#CHOICES WERE MADE

[javelinbk]

Ok, here it is. We've had the 'insane things Paul has said about John' list, now here's 'insane things John has said about Paul'*

*Note: Some of these are ‘John said to me’ quotes rather than words from John himself, so take these ones with a grain of salt.

And because so much of John’s Paul-induced insanity reflected in his actions, some (dis)honourable mentions…

Cutting up a girl's clothes and calling her a whore for sleeping with Paul (from the Beatles Anthology book)

Being mean to Jane when Paul first meets her

Defending Paul after the LSD controversy time and time again

Writing 'I'm always perfect' on a photo of Paul and 'funeral' on a photo of Paul & Linda's wedding

Getting upset about Too Many People and writing How Do You Sleep in response

Mocking the Ram photo with a pig

Using the 'Let Me Roll It' riff in Beef Jerky

Having a fight with Yoko and immediately running off to Paris

Other icebergs…

Insane things Paul has said about John

McLennon - by @frodolives

Paul McCartney - by @frodolives

Sources, full quotes and some others that wouldn't fit under the cut!

"If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with" - The Mike Douglas Show, 1972

"Things are still the same between us. He was and still is my closest friend, except for Yoko" - 1971 interview

"He said to me, 'Artie, you worked with your Paul recently … I'm getting calls … that my Paul wants to work with me and I'm thinking about it … How did it go when you worked with Paul?'" - Art Garfunkel anecdote (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

Mintz: There's one name that has not come up in our discussion [...] Paulie. John: Yes, we did! We got Paul in it. And I object to that 'Paulie' business - 1973 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"If anybody said anything bad about Paul, John'd take a swing at you. He'd say, "You can't talk about Paul like that". Paul was his best buddy" - Alice Cooper anecdote

"I'm entitled to call Paul what I want to, and vice versa; it's in our family. But if somebody else calls him names I won't take it." - 1974 interview

"Paul was one of the most innovative bass players that ever played bass. And half the stuff that’s going on now is directly ripped off from his Beatle period." - 1980 interview

After a late lunch, Linda launched into a long paean to the joys of living in England. When she was finished, she turned to John and said, “Don’t you miss England?” “Frankly,” John replied, “I miss Paris.” - Loving John by May Pang (1983) (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

"The Boulevard Saint-Germainegreer shone in all its springbok glory as he stepped lightly on some French loafers toward the waiting arms of Comrade Amie" (and a lot more) - Skywriting by Word of Mouth

"My cheri my pau pau, do you remember when we were at a cafe on the left bank? You could not find your garter? Because it was on your little prod" - John's song demo (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I'm just like everybody else, Harry, I fell for Paul's looks." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @thegirlwiththeaxe)

"He also looked like Elvis. I dug him." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @lesbianjohnlennon)

As the limousine edged through the screaming fans outside the cinema, John said laconically, 'Push Paul out first, he's the prettiest.' - Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006) (submitted by @fishfingerpies)

I could even hear what they were saying off-mike; ‘Oh Paul, you’re so cute tonight.’ was met with the reply 'Sod off, Lennon.’ - concert anecdote (submitted by @rabiessnail )

'Are those jeans tight, Paul?' That was John. 'What do you mean tight?' 'I can see your suspender belt through 'em and your stockings. You've got ladders in them.' Victor Spinetti, Up Front: His Strictly Confidential Autobiography (2006)

John: It sounds a vaguely good idea but I wouldn’t have my wife or any of me friends wearing them. Paul: Well, you’ve had us wearing them. John: I know, Paulie, but you’re so well-built - 1964 interview

Ringo: And I Love Her, yeah I love that one …and the way you sing it knocks me out, man. John: And the way that camera goes over your head… I thought, 'hello' - 1964 interview

"Meeting Paul was just like two people meeting.  Not falling in love or anything.  Just us.  It went on.  It worked." - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @i-am-the-oyster, @thewalrusespublicist)

"Hey! Did you dream about me last night? …Very strong dream. We both dreamt about it. It was amazing! Different dreams, you know, but I thought you must’ve been there…. I was touching you" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @adriennefrombrooklyn)

"We do need each other alot. When we used to get together after a month off, we used to be embarrassed about touching each other. We’d do an elaborate handshake just to hide the embarrassment… or we did mad dances. Then we got to hugging each other. Now we do the Buddhist bit… arms around. It’s just saying hello, that’s all." - - John in Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968)

Houghton: How do you feel about Paul McCartney now? John: Uh, we’re – haha. [laughs] This is like a joke: “We’re just good friends.” We’re – we’re pretty close now, like I was telling you before. - 1974 interview

"Nobody ever said anything about Paul having a spell over me, when I was with him for a long time. Or me having a spell over Paul. They didn’t think that was abnormal, two guys together. […] Why didn’t anybody ever say, “How come those guys don’t split up? I mean, what’s going on backstage? I mean, what is that Paul and John business? Why – you know, how can they be together so long?” - 1980 interview

"When I’m up against the wall, Paul, you’ll find I do my best" - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @iiiiiiits-m)

"The plus is that your best friend, also, can hold you without… I mean, I’m not a homosexual, or we could have had a homosexual relationship and maybe that would have satisfied it, with working with other male artists." - 1972 interview (submitted by @big-barn-bed)

“When we sang together, Paul and I would share the same microphone. I’d be close enough to kiss him […] So we’d be playing these concerts, in front of thousands of people, but the only thing I could see was Paul’s face. He was always there next to me – I could always feel his presence. It’s what I remember most about those concerts.” - Elliot Mintz, 'We All Shine On: John, Yoko & Me' (2024)

Paul: There’s a story. There’s another one – ‘Don’t Let Me Down’. “Oh darling, I’ll never let you down.” Like we’re doing— John: Yeah. It’s like you and me are lovers. Paul: [reserved] Yeah. [pause] John: We’ll just have to camp it up for those two. Paul: Yeah. Well, I’ll be wearing my skirt for the show, anyway. - Let It Be sessions, 1969 (submitted by @alienoriana)

"The early stuff – the Hard Day’s Night period, I call it – the early period, was the early equi– se– what I’m – what I’m equating it to is the sexual equivalent of the beginning of a relationship, of people in love. And the Sgt. Pepper-Abbey Road period was the period of maturity in the relationship. And maybe had we gone on together, maybe something more interesting would have come out of it." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I mean, there were quite a few women he’d obviously had that I never knew about. God knows when he was doing it, but he must have been doing it" - 1972 interview

“It’s just handy to fuck your best friend. That’s what it is. And once I resolved the fact that it was a woman as well, it’s all right. We go through the trauma of life and death every day so it’s not so much of a worry about what sex we are anymore. I’m living with an artist who’s inspiring me to work." - 1971 interview (note: I know the 'best friend' here is Yoko, but the implications, baby...)

"He rang up and said he’d got this job and couldn’t come to the group. So I told him on the phone, “Either come or you’re out.” So he had to make a decision between me and his dad then, and in the end he chose me. But it was a long trip." - 1971 interview

"This song was written by an old estranged fiancé of mine called Paul" - Introducing 'I Saw Her Standing There' at Madison Square Garden, 1974 (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"The person I actually picked as my partner, who I’d recognised had talent, and I could get on with, was Paul" - 1980 interview (submitted by @crepesuzette2023)

"It would not have been the same. It would have been a different thing. But maybe it wouldn’t either. Maybe it was a marriage that had to end. Some marriages don’t get through that – that phase. It’s hard to speculate about what would have been." - 1980 interview (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist)

"I was living with Paul then, so I wrote with him. It’s whoever you’re living with. He writes with Linda. He’s living with her. It’s just natural" - 1971 interview

"It's like when the lawyers come into the divorce, you know? And that makes it a whole different ball game, you know… 'speak to my lawyer'" - 1973 interview

"It was never a legal deal between Paul and I. It was a deal we made when we were fifteen or sixteen, when we decided to write together, that we’d put both our names on ’em, you know." - 1980 interview

"And “go out and get her,” you know, and forget everything else. So subconsciously I take it that he was saying, “Go ahead.” On a conscious level, he didn’t want me to go ahead. So subconsciously, he… The angel in him was saying, “Bless you.” The devil in him didn’t like it at all. Because he didn’t want to lose his partner." - John talking about Hey Jude, 1980 interview

"When I slagged off the Beatle thing in the papers, it was like divorce pangs, and me being me it was blast this and fuck that" - 1974 interview

"And it’s really lawyers that make… divorces nasty. You know, if there was a nice ceremony like getting married, for divorce, then it would be much better. Even divorce of business partners. Because it wouldn’t be so nasty." - 1971 interview

"It’s like asking a divorced couple, “What day was it that – that decided you to – that the marriage wasn’t going well?” I didn’t – there was no date." - 1976 interview

"I’ve compared it to a marriage a million times, and I hope it’s… understandable for people that aren’t married, or any relationship. It was a long relationship." - 1976 interview

"I’ve only selected to work with – for more than a one night stand, say with an odd thing with [David] Bowie, or an odd thing with Elton [John], or anybody who was hanging around – two people. Paul McCartney, and Yoko Ono. Okay?" - 1980 interview

"I seen through junkies, I been through it all, I seen religion from Jesus to Paul" - 'I Found Out' lyrics, 1970 (submitted by @johns-prince)

“I’m glad that’s over. I feel like I’ve been keeping a vigil for him. Not that I care, you understand.” - John, according to John Green, Dakota Days (1983)

"One girl very shyly gave George a button badge which said ‘George for PM.’ ‘Why would Paul McCartney want you?’ said John to George.” - Hunter Davies’ The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (1968) (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

John: "I was trying to put it 'round that I was gay, you know-- I thought that would throw them off… dancing at all the gay clubs in Los Angeles, flirting with the boys… but it never got off the ground." Q: "I think I've only heard that lately about Paul." John: "Oh, I've had him, he's no good." - 1975 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

And I had a little upstairs, an unusable upstairs, and I kept a radio up there. Very faint. All of a sudden John said, "Is that Paul?" I thought it was somebody he knew named Paul. I didn't see anybody walk by. I said, "No." On the radio, Paul McCartney. We never mentioned anything about The Beatles. This little, low sound you could barely hear, he picked it right up. So, it just made me aware of how much attuned he was with The Beatles after they broke up.. - Gary Tracy, John's optometrist (slightly different version here)

John: "I've always thought there was this underlying thing in Paul's 'Get Back.' When we were in the studio recording it, every time he sang the line 'Get back to where you once belonged,' he'd look at Yoko." - 1980 interview (submitted by @johns-prince)

But in mid-January 1973 Lennon and Ono quarrelled publicly at another party. “I wish I was back with Paul,” Lennon reportedly said. - Peter Doggett, You Never Give Me Your Money: The Battle for the Soul of The Beatles. (2009) (submitted by @notgrungybitchin)

'From time to time John would say to me ''I wonder what Paul is thinking about, right now.'' I said John, I've only met him a couple of times in my life you know … I have no idea. And John would ask ''Do you think he thinks about me at all?''' - Elliot Mintz (submitted by @thewalrusespublicist )

“He was always saying, ‘I wonder what Paul is doing.’ When John and I were together, and this is about a week or two before our relationship ended, I remember him saying, ‘Do you think I should write with Paul again?’ I said, ‘Absolutely. You should because you want to. The two of you as solo performers are good, but together you can’t be beaten.” - May Pang

“Yeah, I miss Paul a lot. It’s been a year since I’ve seen him. He came over with Linda to me place in New York. Course I’d love to see him again. He’s an old friend, isn’t he?” - 1974 interview

"I never thought we’d come to that, because I didn’t think we were that stupid. But we were naïve enough to let people come between us." - 1971 interview

‘Paul? My dear one’ - 1980 interview (submitted by @didwemeetsomewherebefore)

"I’ve read cracks about, “Oh, the Beatles sang ‘All You Need Is Love’, but it didn’t work for them,” but nothing will ever break the love we have for each other." - 1972 interview

'"I just saw a girl who said she saw John Lennon walking down the street in New York wearing a button that said, "I love Paul." She asked him: "Why are you wearing an 'I love Paul' button?", and he said: "Because I love Paul." - Harry Nilsson anecdote (submitted by @bluewater9)

[ballroomeddie]

storylines that could've been, but weren't, developed on screen

madney navigating the difficulties of a second pregnancy as a couple that has experienced a complex pregnancy in the past

eddie reconciling with his son

eddie realizing that he grew up in an unstable household and contending with the emotional repercussions of that realization

the legal and emotional journey leading up to mara's adoption

the emotional ramifications of eddie's separation from the 118 (aside from the buddie of it all)

storylines that were developed on screen

buckneddie's internal conflicts regarding eddie's move

the aftermath of bobby's unexpected death (unlike the others, this storyline had little to no set up. the others were set up in 8a or earlier)

instead of continuous character development we got a montage assuring us that the firefam went through significant emotional journeys offscreen.

kinda feeling like 8b was more about the emergencies than it was about the characters.

[nabi-unveiled]

Hagiwara isn't off the hook.

He shares responsibility in the state of his and Kaori's relationship, and I'm not talking about the cheating.

Put down your pitchfork. Just hear me out.

I adore Hagiwara. He cheated. I don't care. I have mentally added him onto my list of "good boys". I will make a special category just for him.

I'm also not making excuses for Kaori. She must own up that she kept Hagiwara on a string while knowing it was hurting him.

However, their relationship was doomed to fail. They need different things. Kaori needs a relationship where sex isn't expected, and Hagiwara needs a relationship where he can be fully open and honest with his feelings and desires. Frankly, he needs something deeper than Kaori can offer, and I'm not talking about sex.

But the relationship shouldn't have lasted this long, and that's on BOTH of them. It's perfectly okay that Kaori doesn't want sex. It's perfectly okay that Hagiwara does want sex (and intimacy). The problem is that neither of them communicate about it.

Before we go further, there are some points that need to be established. Also note - the symbols are EVERYTHING to me.

1 - Kaori/Hagiwara's relationship is NOT the same as Fujisawa/Sei's.

Their relationships share similarities, but they are NOT the same.

Sei's relationship with Fujisawa developed as a trauma response to a violent car crash. It has carried violent undertones the entire time.

The symbols convey that Fujisawa has methodically trapped Sei in this relationship.

But Kaori and Hagiwara's relationship? It starts with a romantic meet-cute. It was warm. It had saturated colors.

Their relationship does not have a violent undertone. It has an undertone of passivity and complacency. Of note, Hagiwara didn't initiate anything in this relationship. He's waited on Kaori's lead.

The door is open. Hagiwara could leave at any point.

These two relationships also do not have the same power dynamic. Kaori DOES control many aspects of the relationship. However, Kaori has control of the relationship because Hagiwara lets her. Fujisawa has control over his relationship with Sei because Fujisawa demands it. There is a difference.

In fact, the show actually has already acknowledged that there are different types of "controlling". The coworker's relationship isn't painted as unhealthy. Some of us may see it as unhealthy, but the show doesn't give ANY indication of that itself in sound or symbols.

2 - I am in the camp that thinks Kaori DOES like or care about Hagiwara.

Not because I believe her words, but because I believe in the symbols. Kaori made Hagiwara rice.

The rice that represents home and affection? Kaori made it. It's just her version had a sour plum in the middle.

And when she offered it, Hagiwara willingly chose to eat it. He knew the plum was there, and he ate it anyways.

In this week's episode, Kaori explains herself, and she's in black. This is not a typical color for her. She may be smiling, but she is mourning.

We could discuss in length about whether emotional abuse is in play here or if it's just an unhealthy relationship. That's not really the point of this post. Either way, we know that Kaori was finally being honest and vulnerable.

WE SAW HER FEET.

Feet shots happens when our character's true feelings and motivations are exposed. Sei has beautiful heels (desires) but his toenail is broken (😭 Just like his Sim card, but I can't go there right now). Both Kaori and Hagiwara have feet shots too. No broken toenails. In this case, Kaori's feet stop moving. Unlike Fujisawa whose body moves on it's own, her body won't move. We haven't seen Fujisawa's feet.

Kaori can't make herself take action to deal with the situation with Hagiwara. Her choices are selfish, and they hurt Hagiwara. However, I actually think that's very realistic and very human. In unhealthy relationships (and even healthy ones), we can often hurt the people we care about. It's not easy leaving an established relationship. Especially, one that you want. We're not all as altruistic as Hagiwara.

But Hagiwara isn't off the hook.

He shares responsibility in the relationship lasting until this point.

Sei admits his relationship has problems.

But Hagiwara? He denies that they have a problem at first. He's choosing to ignore reality. A conversation with Sei later shows it too.

He wants to believe they've been honest with each other.

Even though he's not verbalizing his actual thoughts to Kaori. For those that don't remember, he has an entire sequence in his head at the BBQ with their friends of what he wants to say. But he doesn't say it. He's not being open and honest with Kaori.

He's also hiding what he truly desires. Kaori didn't say he couldn't drink the sweet coffee. She said it was unhealthy. Sei said it was unhealthy too. He drank it around Sei anyways.

He even bought it FOR Sei even though Sei thought it was too sweet. Hagiwara initiates with Sei.

It's actually been shown that Kaori doesn't care what Hagiwara eats. He's allowed to eat whatever he wants. Kaori isn't telling Hagiwara to go to sleep or eat the yogurt.

She controls sex (and maybe their social agenda). However, unlike Fujisawa, Kaori doesn't keep tight control on Hagiwara as a person.

Unlike Sei, Hagiwara isn't isolated. There's no traumatic backstory. He's more self-confident than Sei. Unlike Sei, he talks about the things he CAN do rather than things he can't. For example, in episode 1, he mentions that "he's good" at organizing parties.

Unlike Sei, he's not trapped in a locked room.

His affection might have been contained and hidden. I think he wonders whether Kaori has things she has to keep inside, because he knows there are things that he keeps inside. But...

He's not trapped. He's stuck. There's a difference.

Hagiwara didn't forget his ID. He didn't forget who he was. He lost his ID, because he's losing confidence in his relationship.

But he's still walking around this building freely. Apparently, he's been walking free without that ID for months. And when he gets a new ID? He chooses to put it back in the case that Kaori gave him.

He wanted to change his picture, but he hadn't taken the steps to do so. He could've changed the situation by being frank with Kaori at any point. Just like Kaori, he avoided. He has chosen to stay.

He chose not to call Kaori out. He doesn't like making people uncomfortable. His nature is to prioritize the other person. Unlike Kaori, his avoidance is inherently unselfish. But it got him stuck. I'm someone who was actively taught to avoid confrontation and to always think of others first. This hits hard.

Kaori was too selfish, but Hagiwara wasn't selfish enough. Being a little bit selfish is a good thing.

He chose NOT to talk about sex with her. He's not comfortable bringing it up with her, because he's not open with her.

Kaori doesn't communicate about sex, because she's afraid that not wanting sex makes her a bad woman. She's surrounded by heteronormativity after all. As @babyangelsky points out, this is what society treating libido as swamp does to you.

Hagiwara doesn't communicate about sex, because he's afraid prioritizing sex makes him a bad man. After all, wouldn't breaking up with his girlfriend just because of sex make him a bad person? Isn't his desire just making the river murky with swamp water? Stupid swamp. He doesn't realize sex is not the real issue. In the end, he has chosen to stay in this relationship even though he's unhappy.

It's why I had positive thoughts about the breakup scene. A lot could be said about Kaori forcing Hagiwara to be the one to breakup, but I was actually glad that Hagiwara said it. It was on both of them that the relationship lasted this long. Neither of them had been willing to speak up about what wasn't working. They both stayed stuck.

Hagiwara is finally speaking his mind. He calls Kaori out.

Hagiwara is no longer being passive. He's asserting control.

Hagiwara is no longer hiding what he wants. He's being open.

Hagiwara is now taking action to change the picture on his ID.

Previous posts about Hagiwara:

The Desire to Be A Good Man

I also have two additional posts about Hagiwara in my drafts. I'll try to get them posted this weekend.

[scarlettohairdye]

Home Ownership Was a Mistake

This is for @trickybonmot, who may or may not use some of these stories in a fic.

Okay. So.

In the year of our lord 2010, my wife and I were lucky enough to be gifted $20k by my parents, which in those days (given it was a historically low point for real estate prices in Seattle) was enough for a down payment on a house. It was an astounding confluence of luck and privilege that led to us being homeowners, because if they gave us the same money now it would go precisely nowhere.

Anyway, it was not enough money for a large house, or a fancy house. We looked at a lot of places, only some of which were move-in ready (and one of which was absolutely just a tear-down) and eventually settled on our current place, which is a 1910 bungalow with a detached garage that was finished and turned into a studio.

Was it the most aesthetically pleasing house when we bought it? No. The walls were white, the carpet was light beige, and the paint had seen better days. That said, it was move-in ready and the owner was pretty desperate to sell, so we took it!

The inspector let us know that some of the wiring was still the old knob-and-tube, so we'd want that updated sooner rather than later, but it looked pretty good. About half the outlets were grounded, so it didn't stop us from plugging in three-prong appliances. We just had to use more extension cords than maybe we'd prefer.

The Electrical

The first big house thing we paid for was to have the entire place rewired. Our circuit breaker was a mystery, we didn't have enough outlets, and we were tired of being stuck with specific layouts of our stuff due to the lack of grounded outlets. We were expecting about half the wiring to be up to code, and the rest would need an update.

Spoiler alert: HAHAHAHAHAHA.

The rewiring took about a week, and every morning the electrician sat down with us and told us what new fire trap he'd uncovered.

"Yeah, so the knob and tube wiring going to the lights in the ceiling? Knob and tube gets hot when it's running, and yours is under three layers of insulation."

"You know how you thought your outlets were grounded? They weren't, actually, the ground wire just went elsewhere into the house and wasn't connected to anything."

"So there's wiring in your crawlspace? Whoever put that in nailed some sheets of wood paneling over it, so we had to rip the wood paneling out to access it."

I think the job was about $15k when it was done, we had many many more outlets, and our house was no longer one bad day from lighting itself on fire. Victory, I guess?

The Studio Window

This was leaking a bit, and we knew it was leaking when we moved in. (South facing walls get all the weather in our region.) We were not handy enough to replace it ourselves at the time and we also didn't have money because I got laid off shortly after we bought the house and was making my living doing costume commissions. Solution: Trade costuming work to an acquaintance who did carpentry.

The window, we discovered, was not so much a finished window as it was a single sheet of glass sandwiched between some boards.

Badly.

The carpenter was not entirely she that she was qualified for the job, but she did manage to remove the single sheet of glass and replace it with a window that was insulated and actually capable of opening. She used caulk around it. It was way better than we had before. Maybe someday we'll have both studio windows replaced by a contractor who actually does windows, but this is not that day!

The Siding

The cedar shingles were no longer cutting it at a certain point, so we had the house resided. (Houses are money pits, in case you didn't know.) This was a $30k job (MONEY PIT!) and had several layers of badness.

Bad: Our house had no insulation. It was cedar shingles over the original siding, with nothing in between that original siding and our INTERIOR WALLS. There was occasionally a newspaper. Our PM asked if we wanted insulation? And we said yes, please!!! We did not have a lot of time to think about insulation or research the best type, so it's just sheets of the pink fiberglass stuff in there, but it exists and we have it now!

Worse: Underneath our laundry room was a horrorshow. The laundry room is an addition that was added to our house probably sometime in the 50s? And, uh...

Well, the siding guys pulled off the siding, took a look at what was under it, and immediately called the project manager. The project manager came out, took a look, and then called us. He said that the siding guys thought it really needed to be reinforced and stabilized before they re-sided it, which is very fair, because I think the people who built it originally were drunk when they did it. It was a fucking Wild West cowboy construction situation under there.

Yes, you heard that right: A LOAD-BEARING SHINGLE.

Our project manager also informed us that the siding guys couldn't do the reinforcement, because they're just siding guys. They don't do structural. This is very fair.

It also needed to be done by Monday so we could stay on schedule for the siding work.

We learned this on Friday.

I immediately called my general contractor dad and got his voicemail, because (I remembered belatedly) he was in Mexico getting dental surgery. There was absolutely no way we could get another contractor out to do the work over a single weekend.

It was up to us.

My wife and I (mostly my wife) went HAM on it. We rented big jacks from the tool library to prop the laundry room up while we replaced one of the entirely rotten support poles. One of the big telephone poles was so wrecked with dry rot we could kick it out of place. (It didn't even touch the BIG ROCK that was supposed to be its foundation!!! It was floating!!!) Several of the joists were also fucked, so we ran new joists alongside them and married them together. My wife dug holes while crouched in a 4' high space, filled the holes with gravel, compacted it by putting a piece of wood on top of it and hitting it with a mallet, and then installed an entire additional support system from 4x4s and deck blocks. She actually attached the support system TO THE FUCKING HOUSE, which was a big improvement from the way it was originally held on by vibes and paint.

Here's a tasty little before and after:

(Yeah, see how that visible joist at the front just... stops at the far left? There's a new joist right behind it now.)

This was completed with resounding cries of, "Good enough!" and "It's better than it was before!" The siding guys thought it was fine and sided over it. Someday hopefully we will be able to afford to tear the whole thing down and rebuild it with a properly poured foundation, but in the meantime the spin cycle on the washing machine no longer shakes the whole house. Victory?!

Ridiculous: The purple paint saga. My wife and I are lesbians who tend toward maximalism in our decoration style. Construction companies find this baffling. We paid extra to our siding company to get the extended color choices (if you order the siding with the color baked in it lasts longer, but you're limited to a particular range of colors) and spoiler alert: 90% of them are boring as fuck. We basically paid extra to have access to 400 shades of white and 400 more shades of beige. There were like three saturated colors in the whole book. Pathetic.

Anyway, we chose the one nice teal that was available and decided we'd paint the door purple, since all the purple colors were gray at best. The project manager then forgot to put in our order, and when he remembered he'd forgotten, ordering our siding through his company would have pushed back the start time by six weeks. We could still make the original start time if we ordered through a different company doing the same thing, though!

Me, immediately: And we wouldn't be restricted to your color palette, right? Him: Yeah, they can do custom colors. Me, slapping down a color card called "Fully Purple": MAKE IT PURPLE.

Bless this man, he went to the siding company and asked for Fully Purple. They told him they couldn't do that color, and also is he sure anyone wants this color? He called them on the phone and informed them yes, we did want that color, and also that he'd worked for them and he knew damn well they could do that color, they'd just have to custom mix it, so they needed to do their fucking jobs. Suitably chastened, they finally sent us a sample of the siding, and it was... okay. It was purple for sure, but a little de-saturated. Not the purple of our hearts.

I asked if they'd actually started manufacturing our siding yet or just sent the color sample. The project manager confirmed they hadn't, and if we ordered this imperfectly-purple siding now, it would be several weeks before we could get started.

"We're gonna paint," I decided, and our project manager put in the orders.

The paint store called him and said, "Hey, are you sure you want this color?" Yes, he assured them, that's the right color.

The guys doing the painting opened up the can and then called him and said, "Are you sure this color?" and he told them yes! They want that color!

At this point I told him he should just start responding with, "They're lesbians!!! Yes! They want the purple! They're lesbians!!!"

Eventually we cleared every hurdle god and the construction industry put in front of us, and now our house is Fully Purple.

It also has insulation, wiring that won't kill us, and a laundry room that hopefully won't collapse anytime soon. We got a heat pump installed that took shockingly little time and worked immediately, and our next project will be having the roof redone. Check back in to find out what fresh horror awaits us then! I think it'll be a second roof under our existing roof made of lead and asbestos tiles, probably!

[imperator-kahlo]

The Last of Us (2023- ) 2x05 "Feel Her Love"

[chillingasavoidcat]

I don't have an excuse and also I blame the fellow people in the walls

[againwithpurpose]

Why does this dude — I guess it’s supposed to be Lestat — look like a horror marionette with icon type hands, crafted in the style of American Gothic? Why are there collage style eyes with abstract, pointy cat ears, which make me think of a cover for The Master And Margarita? Are those hands supposed to be Nikki’s, because they look more like a zombie got creative with Marius’ paints? Why is there a picture of a short haired, westernised Jesus in the background?

I can not be convinced that anyone would have guessed for the contents of this comic book to be TVL, had the title not been there.

[elliethefroggy]

[stranger-nights-ahead]

In what might be the most baffling home renovation decision I've ever seen, our landlord has painted over the ivy growing on the outside of the house

It's truly extraordinary

[loquarocoeur]

i have always read ur name in an obnoxiously french way lmaoo second language coming thru (lo-ka-ra-cœur)

This actually is unironically the original way I intended it and how I say it in my head, but I hadn't considered that maybe I'm not, you know, actually French, my mouth can't really do that

[bisonaari]

I think yall should see what we named the moomin characters in french

[nabi-unveiled]

It didn't start at the museum....for Hagiwara.

At least I personally don't think it did.

Sei is the one that says it started at the museum.

For Sei, that is true.

They had both been developing an emotional connection through e-mail. In e-mail, they were vulnerable with each other. Hagiwara is the one that turned the conversation sexual, but they both engage.

However, the emotional connection didn't mirror what was happening in their physical connection with each other. In real life, they saw each other very differently before the museum.

Before the museum, Sei thought of Hagiwara fondly. Sei gives a small smile when thinking of him. However, he used the same child analogy that Kaori did. He's amused. He didn't see him sexually at this point.

Sei sees Hagiwara as a coworker. Sei notices Hagiwara, but it always comes back to work. He offers to help, but there is nothing in his words to convey anything more than Sei being amused by a coworker who has a tough job. Sei does recognize Hagiwara's effort. It's why he offers to help.

However, Hagiwara definitely saw Sei in a sexual fashion prior to the museum encounter.

That smitten look he had when he first saw Kaori?

He may not realize it, but he gives that look to Sei pretty frequently. He follows Sei with his eyes. He tracks his movements. He's intrigued. Sei's eyes do not follow him.

He leaves a group of coworkers when the conversation was ABOUT him to follow Sei to the bar. He initiates conversation with Sei.

He's the host (and supposedly a very good one), but he follows Sei around ignoring everyone else for a good while. He tells everyone else to get home safe. He pursues Sei in the rain. He tries to share the umbrella. Sei pops up his own. He's offering. Sei isn't taking.

He offers to send Sei a rain app (symbolism I see you). But even if you are not obsessed with symbols, Hagiwara asks Sei to go with him to another bar. None of the other coworkers. ONLY SEI.

Hagiwara has sexual thoughts about Sei. ONLY SEI (besides Kaori). Unlike Sei, he doesn't relate any of his thoughts about Sei to work.

He thinks about Sei a lot period. There are actually several dialogue points where he refers to things he had thought about Sei. But the most notable is probably during the entire walk with the umbrellas. They only talk about Sei (and Fujisawa). Hagiwara initiating mostly.

Sei answers Hagiwara's questions, because he's an incredibly blunt and straightforward person. Sei never asks Hagiwara any personal questions here. He didn't care to know Hagiwara deeper at that point.

Hagiwara offers to buy Sei a cup of warm, fresh coffee after returning the umbrellas. This is symbolism people. The coffee talks.

Once they are at the museum, Hagiwara reaches the statue first. He's already enthralled. However, it's at this point that Sei joins him. They sync up physically. Their movements begin mirroring each other.

Sei actually mentions sending the e-mail first. They sit on the bench together. They discover that the person they've been e-mailing is the man in front of them, and there is joy in that discovery.

The museum encounter changes how Sei sees Hagiwara. Hagiwara is inviting him to listen to the rain, and he now has the link to do so. He reconciles that the stranger he had been e-mailing was the physical man before him. I've ran out of images, but Sei's whole body posture changes on the bench after getting the link to the rain app.

When leaving the museum, Sei's eyes track and dwell on Hagiwara. It's the first time that happens.

Hagiwara invites Sei to dinner. This is the THIRD time he's invited Sei to something with just the two of them (if you count the coffee).

It's the first time that Sei accepts the gesture. (He refused to let Hagiwara pay for the coffee).

Sei now starts asking Hagiwara personal, sexual questions.

But Hagiwara? None of his behavior with Sei changes. It had already started for him prior to the museum. It just deepens.

That's not to say the museum isn't important for Hagiwara. It's VERY important. It's where they synced. It's where emotional and physical merged. It's where they met in the middle, and that makes it special.

I've now written WAY too much about this show. For those that want to read it, here's a master list. I'll keep updating it as I add new posts.

[agendratum]

oh yeah that's too much sauce, this requires chan eating spicy ramen video

[afrenchwriter]

Don't mind me, I’m just here thinking about Sherlock's "John, there’s something I should say, I've meant to say always and I never have...", and Loki's "Mobius, if I don’t make it back...", and the dramatic pauses and all, and how very platonic it all is, how this is definitely what friends say to each other before being sent to the jaws of death. Right?

[locke-esque-monster]

I had a dream earlier, which is a bit fuzzy now, about a SPN episode that would have taken place in season 1. (My brain was convinced it was specifically 1x7 numerically - awake I could not be more wrong.)

Anyway, in this episode Sam and Dean had failed to save a boy during the course of the episode. And in some later season years down the line, they had to come back to this town because the boy's twin sister had also died about a year after they were there, and was now a ghost causing trouble. And the boys had to deal with the failure on this previous case, because the sister wouldn't have died if her twin hadn't (either because of looking into her brother's death/reckless behavior at his loss/taking her own life).

Obviously this episode doesn't exist, but now all I can think is the wasted opportunity of having an episode like this in season 15. Chuck decides a way he can screw with Sam and Dean as the author of their lives by making a whole episode (episodes?) of loose ends he wants to tie up before his grand finale. For example:

The hotel from "Playthings" is about to be demolished and the ghost sisters start acting up again.

Chuck artificially speeds up the timeframe on the baby Rugaru from "Metamorphosis" to make it a problem the boys have to deal with. This also gives a chance to have Sam and Dean revisit and clear the air with their issues from season 4 and the demon blood thing (like the Voicemail) with the benefit of time and distance.

Some kid accidentally rewrites and resurrects the Tulpa from "Hell House", and it spread even faster in the age of social media.

Jesse the antichrist from 5x5 comes back to the states to find something has happened to his parents and goes on a power-fueled rampage.

Ben or Lisa start trying to dig into their missing memories (maybe having stumbled over the books) and get in over their heads, or some monster comes in their path. And either way, the boys end up involved and everyone has to come to terms with that.

Sam runs into a member of Jess's family and has to deal with either his ghosting them after her death and his subsequent "crime spree" he seemed to go on. Or that maybe one Jess's family (like a younger sister) went deep into hunting because they knew something was up with her death.

And I think this would work so well, because first, this is exactly the type of author I think Chuck is.

Second, because it would bring the show full circle to episodes like season 1's "Something Wicked", or "Jump the Shark". Enough time has passed during the 15 years on the air these cases have the similar distance to how much time had passed pre-canon to the episodes above. And how often is a show on the air long enough to be able deal with that? And that like John, their presence had ripple effects. Generally those are positive (the people they saved), but not every case they worked was perfectly wrapped up in a bow. Which could say a lot about endings and writing, and discussing the philosophy of whether it's good as a writer (Chuck) to wrap up these ends or not.

And third, can you imagine if we had that episode before the finale with the vampires coming back from 1x20 to cause Dean's death in the finale? If there was a way Dean's death was going to work narratively, this would be it. Because you have the baseline of however Sam and Dean feel about tying up those loose ends in the previous episode in season 15 now to help set the groundwork of this plotline, so it doesn't come out of nowhere. And it clearly sets the tone of "Chuck won", like in a Quentin Beck from Spiderman Far From Home kind of way. That Chuck still had one ace up his sleeve even if he lost, to make the narrative end on his terms with one last loose end to throw in Sam and Dean's path.

[picspammer]

I was going to make a more... serious? edit to celebrate Songs from the Big Chair's birthday but I kept taking the funniest screencaps so.