#But needs to be told to relax
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there is not enough zoro angst in my opinion. I need zoro on the ground crying and sobbing. I need his entire world falling down around him. I need his nakama there picking up the pieces and comforting him. I need that man BROKEN
#i need this all but only with insane comfort also#i need him to be hugged and told hes ok and that he can relax#GIVE ME THE ZORO CENTRIC HURT/COMFORT I YEARN FOR!!!!! PLEASEEE#me and the like 3 fics i have bookmarked with this premise against the world#one piece#one piece zoro#zoro#roronoa zoro
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Kaeya had always been an efficient and hard-working individual (he had to be to support Diluc in the background as his brother rose thru the ranks after all).
He has so much free time because he completes all his work way ahead of schedule. And if he still has enough time, he adds more to the workload in secret.
And once all of that was done and over with, he makes time for everyone. He has to. He feels as if every moment has to be given to someone else.
No one knows how he does it. No one has to know.
Every mission has a dozen strategies in line, and every battle plan is made with efficiency in mind. His perfect record will not be tarnished. He can't risk it (even if it baffles others that he would willingly activate a ruin guard just to prevent a failed mission. Jean disagrees with his methods, but Kaeya can say that the results say otherwise)
He needs to be quick.
Efficient.
Perfect.
And so he comes and goes like the wind.
Kaeya values time because he knew every second counted. He can't just stand there as if he were frozen. Time could run out in an instant.
Kaeya had only been late once his entire life.
He'd rather he never be late ever again.
It took one day of being of being imperfect for everything to fall apart. On that tragic day...had he gotten there on time... then maybe...
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" Come on, let's get moving, traveler. We're not frozen in place after all. " Kaeya teasingly says. He stiffles a giggle at the traveler's exhasperated sigh.
"Yeah yeah, we've heard enough of you calling us a slacker. Can't you be a bit more patient?" Paimon whines at him.
Kaeya snorts, but acquiesces, hiding the shaking of his hands at the thought of being idle.
He imagines hearing a clock ticking.
Kaeya knows that that is his own problem. He tries his hardest to relax as he waits for the traveler to finish whatever they're making on the alchemy table because, seriously, it is supposed to be a relaxing day. There's nothing major going on, and his schedule is once again empty as intended. What's the hurry?
Kaeya taps his foot on the ground as he waits. He wishes he could take his own damn advice when he tells others to relax.
#kaeyachi randoms#kaeya#kaeya alberich#this is actually shorter than it originally was can yall believe?#kaeya with anxiety truther there i said it#kaeya cant stand being IDLE#get it? get it?#you see that is a play of words in reference to when he is stood idle on our screens. he is one of the more verbally impatient characters#and we also see it reflected on his actions both in fighting and at work. he has a speed boost bonus and if he isnt teleporting he is#actually moving so fast that he seems like it. this is what i also concluded that results him in large amounts of free time that only amber#seemed to be hardpressed about. the people of mondstadt find him reliable and approachable despite the lax attitude and frequent nights at#angels share. we also had lore tidbits before of kaeya straight up saying he finished all his work and jean saying that he also did the#backlogged ones. It is actually insane that we hear him relaxing frequently and i bet its not because of the lack of horses COZ LOOK AT HOW#BUSY THE OTHER CAPTAINS ARE. Also id like to think that he is a toned down noelle and that is why jean told him to watch over her training#give us noelle and kaeya interactions pls i kinda need it tbh#to all those that reached this far into the notes i actually have more to say so get ready#if it wasnt clear the only day he was late was when crepus died. everything fell apart for him that day so i can see some obsessive need to#just keep running around and doing things as efficient as possible. I also think that he found the knights slow and inefficient in several#occasions and he is willing to put them in the line of fire just to get their hearts pumping with adrenaline (and fear lol). idk kaeya is#just so anxiety-coded. impatience-core. Mr. dont waste my time type of guy. and also wow look i found a way to make his idles become angst#silly me ehe#oh youre still here? how about i tell you that kaeya-efficiency-alberich probably knows where everyone is at any time of the day?#can we honestly please give him more free time i need more of him tbh#fun reminder that bro is working around 3-4 jobs casually lmao#i also just realized that the notes is a whole nother post on its own#AND THE ACTUAL FUNNY PART IS I CAN STILL ELABORATE MORE ON THIS LMAO#wait let me add this one tiny idea too but he thinks time is so valuable. bro lost 2 dads and lost time with his bro + he significantly#lessened his time at dawn winery for quite some time. i can see why he is extroverted now.
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how do you expect me to respond to this?
· 𓂃 ࣪˖🔪 ˖ ࣪𓂂 . "Well, not like fucking that! Fucking forget it. Get the fuck out of my fucking face then."
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Saw mermaids in Moomins and had to draw them. Those bitches are cute. These two are from episode 4 of Moomins 1990 tv show.
#the moomins#moomin#my art#mermaids#I love moonins#but dude the sexism in it is crazy#Can't fucking relax and watch moomin without getting told that girls are silly and need to cook
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She heard me doing things so she came up to the side of her baby bin and blelelelele'd at me until I noticed her. She greets me every morning where we spend the first hour of every day together, her just resting in my hand and me holding her, often gently petting her head and tiny scales. If there is a heaven, that first hour we spend together is it.
She is getting a larger enclosure for her birthday in a month and a half. :D Hopefully I can get it done in time, as I haven't sculpted a custom enclosure before and will be trying some new artistic critiques. I do have experience sculpting though. My biggest worry is the paints and sealing them properly! Art I can do- but food safe art that will be in a moist bioactive enclosure is new for me.
#From her enclosure camera#hognose#hognose snake#snake#pets#She is getting a bigger enclosure soon it is preordered and we need to wait#She greets me like this every morning#She ate yesterday and should be in a food coma!#You can even see her lump#So I gave her pets and told her I love her#From inside her enclosure the photo of her being held is from yesterday#She really enjoys pets#Especially after a big meal#I need to get a video of her asking for pets#She will pet herself with her chin#And when I stop sometimes she will pet herself with her chin asking for more!#And then I will pet her and she will relax looking like she is in heaven#Those posts saying “snakes cannot enjoy being pet and will only learn to tolerate it” are absolute BS outdated information#from people who are insecure that they are less valid as humans if animals are capable of feeling love and asking for affection#My snake will LITERALLY ASK TO BE PET#And she will pet me too!#I think she saw me petting her#Thought “This feels nice. Is this what we do for each other?”#And when we are snuggling she'll wiggle over to my arm or shoulder and start petting me. She doesn't pet me in any other places.#It is a lot of effort as she has no hands and has to use her chin#moving her whole upper body#So she'll only pet me maybe 20-10 times and take a rest#Does anyone else's snake pet them?#It is unusual but I think maybe she learned it from copying me and it makes her happy ^_^#What a wonderful world we live in where snakes enjoy being pet
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Chilchuck gets a good deal at DSW and runs some errands! (Progress under cut!)
#chilchuck#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi fanart#literally the most relaxed no pressure piece possible with all the hospital stuff these last few days 😓#my wife told me he looks straight like he's gonna kermit and i needed to make him at least smile#i thought he looked happy like content 😭#also the tree is loosely a star magnolia in bloom#scanner absolutely tearing my watercoloring to shreds idk why :(
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I said goodbye to Bomboś today. Up until yesterday I could see he was still fighting, trying to sleep it off. Yesterday he suddenly became more lucid than he's ever been during the entire illness and today morning he went to his cat bed and just crashed. I had to let him go because I was just prolonging his suffering at this point.
Goodnight my sweet Bibu.
#i was suspecting yesterday was just the last hurrah because he was burning up despite being in the weak state that he was#i am very very tired and sad#at least yesterday evening he was almost relaxed and even stretched the way I haven't seen him do in a while#if someone told me even a month ago I'd lose my cat soon I'd have thought they were insane#i'm taking the next 2 days off work I need to put my house in order#I haven't done anything beyond taking care of Bomboś for the last 2 weeks and the house is a mess#I have to take care of Jimi as well#the poor cat started shedding from stress and throwing up bits of hair#he had no idea what was going on#he was even afraid to approach Bomboś when he was sick because he didn't smell like he used to
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against my better judgment, i made another datv character (qunari this time & now all slots are occupied) and i'm going to add him 🥰
bonus preview of evren <3
#the amounts of hours in cc i spent for my qunari are longer than evren and sezer combined 🥹#and i will post the promised starters soon! i just had to get this out there first 🫡 every night i went to sleep#my inner demons told me to give up INSTEAD i won i defeated them 😈 now i can relax read a book touch grass#THE EYES the eyes took me so long to figure out i didn't want them with the whites neither did the all black sclera work for me and#in my sleep during the moments where you wake up for a second and gain some consciousness my first thought was i'm gonna make his eyes red#... slept like a baby right after that i knew it was the thing i needed to do to find peace 🙉#i'm not sure about his name yet nothing feels fitting ... AGAIN !!#° › OOC ‹ 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄 * out of character ╲ MUN .
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my life feels like never ending work i really resent it sometimes
#not all the time#i need to stay busy always or i feel worthless#should probably work on that#but regardless i choose to stay busy most of the time#so in the rare moments i want to relax being told i have more work to do#it crushes my spirit you know#txt
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[ no dl6 au ]
the 5 year gap is an... interesting time
school's almost done so hopefully i'll have more time to draw :D
[id in alt text]
original meme under cut
#ace attorney#miles edgeworth#no dl 6#ive been told that miles would not smoke weed but i think he would in this au jfbfkd#man's best friend is missing give him a break#cw smoking#he needs to relax in some way
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Joachim Löw, former national coach of Germany, Hansi Flick, head coach of FC Barcelona, Andreas Köpke, former national goalkeeping coach, and Oliver Bierhoff, former DFB manager during the Farewell Game Of Lukas Podolski, 1.FC Köln on October 10, 2024 in Cologne, Germany.
#the GOAT under the goat showing up for the other GOAT#all fun and cosy until it really sinks in that this truly was Jogi's first time back since the fucking E*gland match. it's fine.#(btw my mom elaborated on her 'Jogi looked so goood!!' said it was bc he seemed so relaxed and at ease like she hadn't seen him in forever.#brb jumping)#Jogi Löw#Hansi Flick#Andreas Köpke#Oliver Bierhoff#do you. even need me to say anything at all or do y'all. know me well enough to write my tags yourself.#I think maybe I have one more Jogi centric post in me today or tomorrow. maybe I'll save my breakdown for that one. ANYWAY-#Jungens. Ab jetzt einmal pro Jahr immer so? Für mich?👉👈🥺#heart's a little heavier than before (I KNOW!! did not think it possible either) but mainly I am very happy#Hansi jetzt einfach dauerhaft mit der Sommerbräune die Jogi immer in jedem ersten Länderspiel nach der Sommerpause spazieren getragen hat😭#also can't decide what I love me the fact that there are fans who raised their very young kids to know who LP10 is or that there are fans#who told their children enough legends about Jogi that they're now asking for a selfie. Köln fans my club affiliation dictates that I am no#really allowed to vibe with you but actually you all got my heart🫶
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#i have a doctor's appointment tomorrow that i've had in my calendar for 2 months (almost 3)#and because i'm me i have been thinking and stressing about it for those 2 months (almost 3)#tomorrow is supposed to be over and i'll finally relax (for a bit cause i'll probably have to do blood work etc etc)#and now my mom put into my head that maybe (we don't know she's not sure) MAYBE the doc will have to like check me#and so i will have to remove clothing which i was so not prepeared for and i'm not sure what my reaction will be on the day#because that makes me EXTREMELY uncomfortable... and like i get it you're going to the doctor it could happen but also?#i need to at least imagine it for a week i can't be told this THE DAY BEFORE#now i'm freaking the fuck out#and up until today my major anxiety was ''am i gonna ask the doc about starting t? or should i wait until she does the tests i need done#in case she turns out to be very transphobic and i have to drop her?''#like that was my biggest worry now i have like a million more#i hate this i hate my brain and i hate that i can't have ONE THING i need to do IN THE YEAR without going into panic mode for 3mths straigh#my brain is so fucking useless#angel talks#personal
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I hate living in this world.
#misc#negativity tw#first off i had an argument with a colleague at work#we had to move places for the millionth time in this stupid open space#which already annoyed me#but this guy came at bargained like he always do while i said nothing because it's not like we chooae#and he always does that for actual work because and idk at first i made a snarky comment about now that he got what he wanted he better be#ready to work instead of hiding when somebody ask him to do his job#and he told me he didn't understand the remark#and my hot temper that makes me snap every five years took over#i bet he has by now complaining aboutme like he does about everything#anyway i take hours to calm down (not calm after 4 hours)#I'm also pissed at me cause i can't get emotional without shaking stupidly which makes me look like an hysterical person (i mean sadly i am)#also if there has to have an explanation once my anger is gone tomorrow i will be back on social anxiety mode which is gonna make it worse#all of this reminded me that i need to find a new job for ten thousand reasons#but unfortunately all employers are shit and actually i don't even know what i want to do#and as usual i have no energy for anything because i am still a major piece of shit#then i wanted to relax#made the mistake to open Instagram because I'm also stupid#and i know i don't often talk about politics and stuff#but it's really draining me#i barely or read news just enough to be aware#and honestly its exhausting but I dont want to complain cause Im in a privileged position where i have the chance to be able to 'shut off'#and yes my country and especially this government is sickening me#and like its people too#and also insta is full of pride posts#and i am stupid to read the homophobic and transphobic comments#and genuinely these people alongside racist and islamophobic people really scare the hell out of me#hopefully i don't engage but i shouldn't read anything at all tbh#speaking of pride im spiralling because even tho i kinda identify as aro i feel like a freak and i have nobody to tell me im not
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everyday i say and do something more autistic than the last
#me crushing the babybel wax and being amazed that my coworker does not LIKE to crush the wax but thats the most fun part!!!! the feeling!!!#or needing to have something in front of me at all times if im sitting at a table#need to have my hands busy or draw or something because then i can direct that energy somewhere and relax#self diagnosing has alwahs been weird to me bcuz i never wanna take credibility or pretend like i know what its Like to have something if a#professional hasn’t told me#but sometimes i do things that feel slightly like adhd or autism and i dont want to label myself but i at least. have tendencies#i don’t feel like i identify with everything and i dont think i have full fledged adhd or whatever#i think years of ed have shot my memory in all honesty#but in the end it does not matter
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#i think getting nearly firecracker-bombed the other evening affected me more than i realized at the time#because this has been by far the worst new year's ever for me#in the past i was never more than mildly annoyed by it and even enjoyed the midnight fireworks climax#but i think i might have actually gotten a bit traumatized by that experience two days ago#and hadn't acknowledged it to myself / processed it. as today/tonight has demonstrated#it's past 3 a.m. now and i'm still crying too hard to sleep#and my whole body has been shaky for the past... 10 hours. or so.#even though the fireworks at midnight weren't really that bad at all#not even close to being as terrifying as the three explosions earlier this evening#which in their turn were easily outdone by the street explosion on saturday night that deafened me#i think i may be having a legit delayed trauma response to that now#re-triggered every time a firework goes off near me#i've never been someone who feels much fear#i feel stress and anger and discomfort and i worry and overthink sometimes#i've done a lot of things in my life while thinking 'well. this might be about to kill me. but we all die someday'#and never till this weekend did i feel terror on this level#(a technically unjustified terror too. bc inside my flat i'm almost 100% safe. so that again suggests a trauma response)#i don't think i've ever cried from sheer fear for my safety before#and every post i see saying 'happy new year' makes me feel sick bc it reminds me of this horrible weekend#it's wild how my lifelong feelings about fireworks could change so completely in the course of just three days#for the first time in my life i feel the need for one of those drugs that blunts your emotions and helps relax you#what is that... xanax or something like that? how do you get it? do you need a prescription?#i feel like a doctor would just scoff if i told them that NYE fireworks traumatized me so bad i need medication now#i've been trembling for hours. i'm so tired. i wish i could sleep#*three days ago
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i'm such a raging workaholic (years of hustling for my bread for survival and being obsessed with growth and progress does this to a mf who likes nice things like me), so i often ignore my body's cues for rest and nurturance and like. i got a new work laptop for christmas and i have to keep telling myself BITCH GO PLAY VIDEO GAMES. READ A BOOK. IT IS OKAY TO REST and not fcking work on anything.
#i can always feel myself getting sick when i need a Break#and i feel a head cold coming on#if u wonder why it takes me so long to write anything it's because i have a full time corporate job and a full time coaching business#i literally do not chill or relax#i LOVE working and i'm a complete freak who refuses to give up on my dreams#i fully believe i deserve rest it's just hard for me to recognize when i need it.#bc i honestly enjoy my life so much that it feels like play all the time so it's hard to tell when i need Inner Child Playtime (Fiction)#anyways#i think i'm being told to rest and i just needed to yap about how resting means BRAIN OFF NO WORKING to remind myself
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