#But also even though i have food i can't seem to bring myself to eat it bc no interest whatsoever

[romaniacs]

▌ㅤNATASHA ROMANOFF — I MISS YOU MORE THAN LIFE

( read more ) synopsis — natasha's harsh words are like a knife twisting inside your already mean brain as she's been dealing with an imminent breakdown due to work-related stress, and so she soothes you from the pain she causes herself. warnings — female reader x natasha romanoff, crying, a little bit of everything; fluff + angst… so hurt-comfort.

"y/n- you're still up?" natasha sounds tired just before her breath catches in her throat as she sees the mess she's caused, your teary eyes lifting to rest on her worried face. "baby, no, why are you crying? are you in pain? having cramps?" and your silence is brief yet loud. "is it something i said? did i… did i make you cry?"

her hands roam over your wet cheeks as she feels a wave of that nurturing energy she usually has taking over her again, as strongly as it could be after a long time of giving you nothing. when she said i don't think i wanna go out in a stressed-out tone, looking over the paperwork she had to finish yesterday, it felt a bit off to you. when she had the last bites of the food you had kept for yourself, you just sulked in a corner. woman had to eat, it was fine. when she stopped kissing you goodbye before leaving, you understood. but when you were on a call and she started cussing out as she dealt with a sudden work issue that popped up and sounded rude to you too, it was a bit too much for you.

i'll hang up, she said not long ago. i'm a bit too mad to talk right now and you're not helping. your headache will pass, just go to bed.

you feel the distance natasha's putting between you two solidifying with time, and things don't seem to be going well with your job either.

it's just been hard. in general.

and now that she finally got home and entered your bedroom, reality hit her like a truck.

"it's nothing" you bring her hands down, off your face, but don't want to be rude. it really is nothing much. you just want to be left alone, as she seems to have been trying to make happen. "it really isn't, don't mind me. just sleep. it's late."

"are you kidding me? you're crying, y/n" her voice is not as soft, strangely. "if i did anything wrong, you can just tell me."

"can't you see it yourself?"

her eyes are suddenly locked onto your face, even though it's dark. she's also finally coming down from the long-lasting stress she's been through. "well, yeah" she sounds weird. calmer. confused. way more aware of herself, and consequently her eyes water up in a second. "yeah. sorry. i think i've been a bit harsh lately. it's just…"

"work, i know" you pat her hand softly as you give her an understanding look. "it's fine. just rest, okay?"

natasha can't bring herself to say much anyway, so she takes the chance to take off her jacket and lay down beside you. after a while, she rests an arm around your waist, pushing some hair off your forehead.

"i'm really sorry, y/n" natasha mumbles on your back. "i don't love you any less. i just haven't been doing so right. it's hard keeping my cool, and i try not to be harsh, but…" her voice trails off. "i've been under a lot of pressure. and not managing it well. but i love you."

"you don't have to explain anything to me, i understand. just don't treat me differently if you can just not treat me in any way and avoid making me second-guess my own actions" you whisper. "i love you a lot, nat. i don't need calmness, i just need to be sure you still love me. so it's okay."

"mhm. just hate myself for making you cry, you don't deserve that" she places a gentle kiss on your skin, her body warmly placed behind yours. and things almost feel normal for a second, just as they used to be before the mission she's been on. "i won't stop loving you even when hell freezes over, detka. trust me."

and you do, you can finally fall asleep. you feel wanted again, even if things still hurt, even if work won't stop on the way of your relationship, but whatever it is that tries to bring you down is fortunately none of your heart's business; even when your heart is heavy, it's still hers.

[moonlits-ocean]

Long Way Home [Part IX]

[Azriel x Reader fanfic]

Synopsis: Y/n is the daughter of a healer in the city of Velaris. After a small incident, she moves to the House of the Wind to work for the High Lord, Rhysand. Everyone in the house seems to welcome her except Azriel, the second in command. Even though he is just blankly polite and does not acknowledge her much, she can't help but fall for him. Does Azriel return her feelings or remain unfeelingly aloof?

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

Read Part 1 here. Read Part 7 here.

Read Part 2 here. Read Part 8 here.

Read Part 3 here.

Read Part 4 here.

Read Part 5 here.

Read Part 6 here.

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

Part IX

The heavy rains continued for a couple days more before stopping. It was impossible for Azriel to visit at the time, but I began to grow anxious when I didn't see him even after the weather turned clear. 

I caught myself waiting, looking outside my windows as I continued with my day. It was an agony, and I didn't know what else to do. Had he given up? Was he wounded? I grew more worried, and after a week passed by with no sign of him, I decided to visit Velaris in person and check. 

The following morning, I woke up early to have a quick breakfast and then pack an overnight bag. I was in the middle of washing the dishes when there was a knock on the front door. 

Abandoning my task, I ran to the foyer, drying my hands with a dishcloth and anticipating Azriel's face. 

My face fell when I saw Rhysand, Cassian, and my father framed by the open doorway. I immediately schooled my expression, mentally chastising myself for being so excited. They were wearing somber expressions as I led them to the living room. I felt my heart thumping in panic as I asked them for refreshments and they declined. What could possibly have happened that they came all the way here instead of Azriel?

We all sat down, and I couldn't stop bouncing my knee as Rhys and Cassian took in the villa. 

My father was the first to speak. "Azriel's taken ill."

I couldn't stop the concerning expression that plainly showed only face. I was in love with Azriel, after all. "Is he wounded?"

He shook his head. "It's a fever, headache and stomachache. He should've been healed by now. But—"

Rhys took the rest of the explanation. "But he's not eating or drinking anything. Any medicine that your father tries to give him he rejects it. He's become delirious, confined to bed and keeps saying your name all the time. Everyone of us have tried coaxing him to have something. He's just not listening. We don't know what to do."

Cassian's voice had lost its usual liveliness. "We know that he has hurt you. But please, I beg you, come back and treat him. Save our brother. He'll really die from a simple fever at this rate."

I swallowed, my eyes filling with tears. Our mating bond had a weak pulse, and now I knew the reason. Azriel...

I had been hurt, but I wasn't heartless. And maybe, it was now the time to move on and let him in. 

"Bring him here, I'll nurse him back to health."

Relief was visible on their faces, Rhys and Cassian engulfed me in a group hug before immediately taking off to winnow their brother here. Father lingered back, and he gave me instructions on the medicine and food to prepare after which he too, had to leave. He had patients waiting in the city. 

He left after engulfing me in another hug and told me that he loved me. 

I took a few moments to steady myself. Then I started on the preparations as per the instructions, anticipating Azriel's arrival. 

My mate's arrival. The words put a smile only face, despite it all. 

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

Tags:

@kalulakunundrum @thelov3lybookworm @hnyclover @impossibelle @sourapplex @brujitafantomatico @venuseuripedis @darling006 @fightmedraco @lees-chaotic-brain @thesunloveschips

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

Read Part 10 here.

This fanfic can also be found in Wattpad, along with other exclusive parts like playlists and pictures. Here's the link: https://www.wattpad.com/story/358573037-long-way-home

Happy reading! <3

[always-sleeepy-headd]

Happy Birthday, Your Present Is Angst Because I'm Tired and Kinda Emo Inside

This was written for Cross's birthday ages ago and I'm only now posting it lol (Sorry!)

Summary:

It's Cross's birthday today, he wants to forget and he tries his hardest too. Although it never seems to work and just leaves him with more scars and more pain.

Cross is beginning to love that pain.

Notes:

Cross burns himself so if you don't think you can handle that I just wanted to let you know.

Also he purges and I know that's a sore spot for a lot of people including myself but I'm tiny bit of a masochist lol (I actually enjoy writing about things that have happened to me or to someone dear to me and projecting on my poor Crossyboo 😔✊)

Don't purge guys, it's not good and can seriously damage your body, and if you have before, I got you babes everything will be alright <3

Even if you're just going through a tough time right now remember everything is temporary, you and I, the world, sadness, you name it, we'll all make it through if we keep trudging on!

_________

Cross wasn't the type for celebrations, it made him nervous and want to hide under something while everyone just chatted it up like they weren't all dead.

He was sure nobody knew this year though, just like the last, and the one before that. A third unnoticed birthday is what he was hoping for when he checked the time this morning, he could go on with his usual day and hopefully not pass out again.

That was really close with Nightmare the other day, he was out training for an especially excessive time and Nightmare came in and had told him to take a break and Cross had barely registered him.

He had turned to the noise but all he heard was a ringing in his ears, he heard Nightmare's voice a second time and he was able to make it out then, "And take a shower or something."

As soon as he heard the door close he had stumbled and blacked out, it was only for barely a minute thankfully. When he got up he found himself on the floor and his heart beating quickly, thank the skies nobody had come in just then.

He had eventually managed to get up and take a shower before being called down to eat dinner, it was a very strange tradition for someone like the Bad Sanses, they always ate meals together. But honestly if you really think about it it makes sense, Horror needed to know everyone was eating, he could go into panic mode if not.

It also made it easier to figure out if something was wrong with someone, that's one of the reasons meals were dreaded in Cross's mind.

That and the fact he can barely handle eating the food, much less keeping it down, and don't get him wrong, Horror's an amazing cook... he just can't. Especially when he's already frustrated with himself.

He barely made it though dinner, Nightmare gave him a few looks but he must have chalked whatever it was up to low self worth and Cross overworking himself, which was what Nightmare thought were the only things wrong with Cross, making it so much easier for him to do what he does next.

Cross's nightly routine always starts hunched over a toilet throwing up his insides and silently crying while doing so, this was easy to do without Nightmare noticing because Dust almost always had at least a small freak out during this time of evening.

Then when he's done throwing up anything and everything he's eaten and kept down he collapses onto the floor and desperately rummages through his box of 'special' things, pulling out a lighter and lighting it across his bone.

The intensity of the heat calms him while at the same time making him restless, he needed something, something.

Anything.

He would burn and burn and he would even shed a few tears at the pain, just to do it again just to feel the heat of reality mix with fiction.

It was like a dream.

A terrible, awful, dream.

That would eventually bring him to today, he was putting on his overly complicated outfit again and would stare into the mirror as he splashed water on his face.

It was cold.

He wanted heat.

The pain of his burns hurt, he wanted more, more, anything for feeling and control, he would run them under cold water and this was the time of day Chara would say something to him. Chara would run off away from him to look for Killer to watch him play video games or mess with the others.

It was always along the lines of, "Cross, this is seriously getting bad," Or, "I think you should let that heal at least before doing it again..."

Cross didn't trust those words, not from Chara, not from anyone.

He walks down the stairs only to see an unhappy Nightmare and a on the verge of a panic attack Dust.

That was not a great thing to start his morning with, oh well he'll just ignore it at least means the attention will stay far away from him this morning.

Cross doesn't bother a good morning, he didn't feel like speaking. Nor did he really ever but that's life.

He walks into the kitchen to see how Horror's doing as he does every morning but Horror seems quite on nerve so Cross doesn't walk too far into the kitchen, it was a small gesture but very much noticed by the big guy.

"Good... morning Cross," Horror starts, sounding a little on edge, "The boss told me to keep everybody occupied this morning... although I know you usually train.. I was wondering if you'd help me out...?" He asks.

Cross was startled but he would never say no to someone asking for help, it's a habit he could never sway, he nodded but in a more 'are you sure?' way.

"Thanks... I asked Killer but... you know how he is..." Horror says, shuffling around, seemingly understanding Cross's not speaking as him not being up to conversation and handing him a bowl and some chocolate.

Cross gives him a questioning look, "Just... heat up the chocolate so it melts..."

"A-" Cross attempts but his voice fails him, "I- Is there a specific reason that I'm heating up... chocolate...?" Cross asks, they didn't usually even have chocolate in the house, let alone anything sugary but it seems Horror either had a stash or got this special to make something.

"Wanted... to make something." That was enough for Cross, he didn't care to question it any further, besides he really just wanted to get Horror's approval.

Cross, without a word, easily heated up the chocolate over the stove, it began to bring back memories of his AU he didn't want surfaced.

The sound of laughter, the taste of chocolate in his mouth, his arms didn't hurt, the worst he felt was a little sore. Speaking to everyone, not holding his tongue, no, actually feeling the urge to speak real words out loud.

The smell of chocolate cake, kind words he'll never hear again-

His palm burning.

Cross blinked in surprise and lifted his arm off of the stove quickly, he had accidentally set it down on the burner and hadn't noticed, the feeling already so normal to him.

Horror looked over at the sudden movement and asked him what was wrong.

Cross didn't respond.

The words were so caught in his throat, they refused to leave, he didn't want to speak, he didn't want to speak, he didn't want to-

"Cross." He hears a powerful and commanding voice that was unmistakably Nightmare's.

Still he didn't speak but his hand fell from where he was apparently clutching it.

"Is something upsetting you Cross? I can feel your emotions you know, so it would be best not to lie, I will know." Nightmare asks, Cross barely understanding.

Nightmare wanted him to speak.

He didn't want to speak.

He turned towards Nightmare, but still he couldn't even manage to get his mouth open.

"Cross, respond to me." He says and Cross could barely even think, his brain suddenly filled with images of his family's death.

A death of his own, maybe.

And then, his lack of food and therefore energy caught up to him yet again, he stumbled and then blacked out.

...

When he awoke he lay on the couch with a damp washcloth on his head and a bandaged hand, he almost panicked but realized his arms had no such care, Nightmare hadn't felt the need to check for other injuries thank gods.

Cross sat up and took the washcloth off of his head, staring at his hand for a moment before a smell hit his nose.

Chocolate cake.

He couldn't handle this, not right now, not ever.

It was his birthday, a day that he dreaded every year now, October 10th, the day Cross was born.

A day he considers to be the worst day of his life.

Celebration was no more, he needed a way out, he needed to get his frustration out, he needed to burn every piece of bone on his body until it was unusable, then use it anyway.

"Cross, you're awake." Nightmare says, startling slightly.

Cross didn't say a word.

"What's going on, you've been strange all week, more so than normal. Your little nightly negativity bursts have been getting larger and more prevalent every night, I think now is when I interfere." He sighs and Cross almost gasps, Nightmare knew something was wrong.

He didn't want to speak, his body would not let him.

He wanted to cry, his body could not.

He wanted to burn, he wanted to burn, he wanted to burn, he wanted to burn-

"Cross. Are you listening to me?" Nightmare's voice suddenly bursts through his thoughts of self harm. "Cross I'm not kidding, have you suddenly gone mute?" Nightmare says, his voice turning stern but softening a second later, "I promise I won't judge if something is bothering you."

Cross manages to open his mouth this time, nothing comes out though. So he closes it, unsaid words threatening to spill out now and that scares him more than not being able to get anything out.

Nightmare sighs, "At least tell me what happened, Horror was terrified..." Nightmare mumbles.

Cross opens his mouth again, but this time it worked, "I... got distracted..." He manages to mumble, his voice hoarse from little use.

Nightmare sighs again, "Distracted how? You end up with a burn on your palm, which you should have noticed right away if you had your hand on the burner by the way, that's really weird and you might need to figure out what that is supposed to mean, Horror is concerned you haven't been eating enough and passed out due to lack of malnourishment, although I'm going to guess it was overexertion, but then again you just woke up-" Nightmare sighs a third time, "My point is, what the hell got you so upset?"

"Ch-" Cross coughs slightly, rubbing his throat, "Chocolate..." He muttered, "The smell reminded me of something."

"...Oh boy." Nightmare says, realizing this was probably a mistake.

"...What...?" Cross mumbles.

"I think I should just show you, follow me." Nightmare says, gesturing to a door.

Cross got up and followed Nightmare without a beat, anything to get his mind off of his-

...

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY CROSS!" Mostly Killer yells, Cross is suddenly hit with a dump truck of emotions.

"I- I- H- How- I don't-" Cross whispers just loud enough for everyone to hear.

"You told me one time when I was upset about something." Dust says, who happens to be covered in colorful streamers.

"And you told me when I was half asleep!" Killer yells excitedly, he's covered in silly string and Cross realizes that Nightmare has a tiny piece of it on his shoulder.

This made him cry.

He didn't cry in front of others, it was so taboo in his brain.

It wasn't sobs, it was just tears, he barely changed expressions.

Everyone looked startled, they had been expecting Cross to say they didn't need to or maybe even get a small smile out of him, not tears.

Killer immediately ran over when he realized what was going on, "Hey, hey, what's wrong? I thought birthday parties were supposed to be happy?"

Cross couldn't explain so it came out in sobs, Killer grabbing onto him while Cross cried on his shoulder.

Killer caught Nightmare's gaze and gave him a panicked look and Nightmare just shook his head.

...

Once Cross had calmed down and there were just occasional sniffles every now and then, they had moved one of the couches, "So... is this why you've been acting strange this whole week then?" Nightmare asks.

"S- Sorry." Cross mumbles.

"Do not apologize for things you are not at fault for."

"Sor- uh."

"Poor Crossy baby, he can't stop being a people pleaser~" Killer says, smooshing his face against Cross's in a manner that could be taken as mocking but Cross knows Killer well enough to know it isn't, still doesn't stop him from shoving him off though.

Killer is undeterred, he just hugs onto Cross harder.

"...Are you... okay?" Horror asks, looking worried.

"...Yeah. I'll live." Cross mumbles an 'unfortunately' afterword that only Killer and Nightmare could hear, Killer squeezed a little tighter at hearing that.

"Why did you pass out...? Do you... know?" Horror asks.

"..." Cross can't bring himself to tell them the way he treats himself when they aren't looking.

"You do know, don't you?" Nightmare asks, his tone only slightly accusing, Cross flinches either way.

"Criss-Cross, are you doing something to yourself?" Killer asks.

"Yes." Is the only word that Cross can manage to get out of his mouth, everyone's frown deepens at the sound of it.

"What...? If I may ask." Nightmare says, even though it sounds like you have a choice, you'll have to tell him anyway, he'll just ask you when nobody is around.

"I can barely eat..." Cross whispers, "And when I manage too, I throw it all up, I can't keep food down anymore, I don't even need to make myself throw up anymore... I can do it on command."

"...What?" Horror says, looking horrified.

"I'm sorry..." Cross says and his voice starts to waver, tears threatening to spill again.

Suddenly Chara's voice pops in, "What about your arms?" They say, "I know you already told them some of your bullshit but every morning when I see them they get worse."

"That's not... the only thing..." Cross mumbles, clutching at his sleeves.

"Of course it isn't." Nightmare sighs.

"..." Cross slowly rolls up his sleeves and a series of gasps and exclaims are heard, one from Nightmare as well.

"W- What the hell are you even doing???" Dust asks, his horror not even hidden.

"Burning." Cross says.

"... How much is there?" Nightmare asks.

"All over my whole body... but mostly my arms." Cross says, wincing.

"I- I don't even know-" Nightmare says, seemingly astonished. "You know what? Come here, let me heal you."

...

Cross was super embarrassed the entire time Nightmare was healing despite Nightmare telling him that it was fine over and over.

It... went away.

The burn is gone.

He needs the burn, the painfully awful heat on his bones to stab at his regret and shove it so deep down it disappears momentarily.

Nightmare notices his... unhealthy... thoughts and lets out a frustrated sigh, "Cross, you do know you're definitely not allowed around lighters anymore right?"

"Okay." Cross says, his emotionless stature coming back, but Nightmare, being so close to him, could feel the addiction in his aura, the temptation and pain that Cross was so good at hiding.

Nightmare frowns at this.

"Come on, I thought we hit something and you wouldn't be an emotionless robot around us anymore." Killer grumbles and Nightmare sends a glare his way, Cross knew Killer was actually worried about him though.

Throughout his entire time at Nightmare's he's seen everyone but Nightmare cry before, Nightmare obviously has his own problems though, he's seen him flinch when he gets glared at or Killer and Dust's roughhousing gets a little too close to him and a hand goes up near him.

They never seem to notice though, they just keep going and Nightmare will sigh and tell them to be nice and that he's going to take a nap. He never does though, he goes and sits in his library and reads what are 'not' romance novels. Cross had seen it himself, Nightmare was reading a book that Cross had read and of what he remembers it was all schmoopy feelings and smut.

He leaned over and said, "Whatcha reading there?" He giggles as Nightmare flinches and turns his head around quickly, his face turning extremely confused as it was not normal for Cross to act like this at all.

"Sorry about startling you, I just recognized the book you were reading." Cross says, holding back giggles.

The horror that showed on Nightmare's face when he said that was unmatchable with anyone he's ever seen die at the hands of any of them.

"You. Didn't. See. Shit. You hear me?" Nightmare had said, Cross replying with a thumbs up and giggling a little.

Nightmare was interesting, although seeing Killer cry was the craziest thing Cross thinks has ever happened.

Killer was supposed to be emotionless, he wasn't supposed to feel anything at all.

And the funny thing about it was that Killer wasn't crying about regret, or his own sadness, or even for someone dead.

Killer was crying about a fake comic about two cats.

Nightmare's face when he heard Killer's sobs in the corner of the room was completely shocked, Killer per usual was sitting on the bright pink beanbag in the corner of the room that had been there as long as Cross has and longer.

As it was just Cross, Killer and Nightmare home at the time, they both had looked over immediately and seen Killer sobbing over his phone, Nightmare had run over as quickly as he could and asked what was wrong.

"The cat dieddd!" Killer responds, sobbing into Nightmare's shoulder.

"...What?" Nightmare had said, confused as ever.

This was also the first time Cross had heard of Color, apparently Color had sent Killer a link to this super cute cat comic about two cats who were siblings but then a human killed on of them near the end of the comic, Color had also apparently sent that 'watch this being back your emotions' and Killer had been like, okay, whatever I guess I'll read it.

But then the cat died and he started sobbing.

Cross had felt bad but then he realized the hilarity of the situation and started to uncontrollably giggle.

Nightmare had looked at him and given the most 'are you kidding me' face in the world and Cross started to laugh more.

Killer's face when Cross started to laugh was so...

Let's just say there was no words to describe the mix of hurt and then awe at Cross's laughter.

Cross didn't emote, that was how it was and how Cross thought it would always be.

Nightmare was the first to change that, then Killer started to hang out with him after that, Cross never realized how funny Killer was. It was hard to see through the insensitive bitchass Killer was when he first met him.

Killer had... changed in his eyes a lot since then, like right now, with Killer hugging on his arm that had already been healed to the best of Nightmare's ability.

Like right now? Killer was the cutest thing Cross thinks he's ever seen.

Killer and Cross weren't dating, neither of them were good enough with their own feelings to deal with eachothers. They liked each other, maybe.

That's how it was and Cross didn't mind, Killer wasn't as much as a bitchass as he'd first thought.

"My apologies about all the festivities Cross, we just were excited that we finally found out when your birthday was and didn't think about how you hadn't said anything for the past three years, or how it might have painful memories attached to it." Nightmare says, finishing with his other arm.

"... I'm fine, I just..." Cross sighs, "My birthday was never a bad thing before... It's not like I have these terrible birthday memories, it just reminds me of... my AU." Cross says, stopping himself before he says family, he couldn't call them that, it hurt too much to think of how they were gone.

"I understand, if you want us to ignore it from now on we will, but I think it might help if your memories of your birthday are not all of things that cause you pain." Nightmare says and Killer nods and whispers.

"I got you a special present." he says in Cross's ear, seemingly excited about it.

"Okay," Cross says, talking feeling so much easier than usual, "I think you're right..."

"Yay!" Killer exclaims, "I can't wait to show you what we got you~!"

Cross exhales and smiles a little at Killer, who sees it and his eyes light up in a triumphant way. "I knew you could smile." He says, getting in Cross's personal space a little.

Suddenly, Cross knew everything would be okay.

[yandere-fics]

Theanna's NSFW Alphabet

♡ A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) ♡

Aftercare involves her asking a maid to draw a bath for the both of you, of course she keeps you both wrapped up in robes as the maid runs the bath because while she's an exhibitionist slightly she doesn't want anyone to view either of your bodies. If there's not time for a bath then she'll just wrap you up and carry you wherever she was going so you can doze off on her lap.

♡ B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) ♡

Her tongue since you seem to enjoy it so much whenever she's eating you out. It always makes you so loud even though you don't want to be loud because the councilors are literally right outside the door waiting to be let in while she insisted on undressing you and since she doesn't allow anyone to look at your body they had to leave the room.

Your thighs, it's like all this woman does is think about eating pussy, she also doesn't mind eating ass either if you don't have one, she just wants to have her mouth on a hole, it's like it's what she was born to do, anyways getting back to the main point, she loves the way your thighs try to close around her head and how easy it is to force her apart.

♡ C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) ♡

It's obviously going to be happening on her face or her fingers, if it's on her fingers then she'll lick them clean and then possible go down there to get a full taste because what she got from her fingers wasn't enough which leads to her eating you out like five times until you're trying to push her away because you literally feel like you might die if she does anymore, then she'll chuckle and call for a maid to bring in some food or water for you. In the omegaverse she'll give you her knot when she's in rut or you're in heat but otherwise is mostly the same and wants her mouth on you.

♡ D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) ♡

She likes threatening to make her advisors clap when she makes you orgasm if you don't stop fidgeting on her lap and trying to get away from it, of course she's not actually going to do this but it's cute when you lose the strength to fight and she laughs a bit because all the advisors in the room having to hear this and pretend they heard nothing are all very very tense.

♡ E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) ♡

She had a few dalliances in her teen years but it's been a very long time since then and most of them are dead because a lot of her allies in that time period either died or betrayed her(excluding the loser squad and a few advisors who were on her side). She a bit rusty but she picks it up very quickly again.

♡ F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) ♡

Anything where her head is between your legs, she particularly is a fan of you sitting on her face because you always try not to suffocate her at first but eventually your legs can't hold themselves anymore and she gets what she wants which is very nice in her opinion.

♡ G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) ♡

She makes a few jokes here and there, mostly about how you can't escape her and how funny she finds it that you even tried in the first place, or she'll laugh about how the advisors can't say shit when she's fingering you in the conference room and then licking her fingers off. It's all a bit of a joke to her actually.

♡ H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) ♡

She doesn't grow enough hair that she needs to shave, she only has a bit of arm hair on her and the rest is a very very thin fuzz you can't even see. She doesn't care what hair you have really but if you do have pubic hair she might suck it into her mouth to make sure she gets all the flavor of you.(I hate myself for writing that and if she did that to me our relationship would actually be over.)

♡ I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) ♡

It's not intimate because she keeps taunting you about how you'll never be able to escape her and how weak you look under here, even when you're queen and you've been cooperative and have never tried to escape she's still taunting you like "it's good that you've always known escape from me is impossible."

♡ J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) ♡

She only gets herself off in the omegaverse, usually jerking it as she eats you out otherwise she just doesn't bother, masturbating would only be taking more time away, valuable time she could be using to eat you out, she is not letting even herself take away from her valuable meal time.

♡ K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) ♡

Has a master thing going on but it's not towards you, it's towards everyone else, she loves that she can just do with with you everywhere and no one can say a damn thing about it, of course she would never let them see your body but everyone hears you and obviously knows that underneath the coat she's draped over you, she is fingering you. She's also very very into overstimulation.

♡ L = Location (favorite places to do the do) ♡

Anywhere is game but especially the council room if she's sure she has enough time to do it there. She might start doing it when you during a meeting and then make everyone leave the room so she can actually strip you away from prying eyes, have you for a couple hours, and then everyone has to stand outside for two whole hours waiting to be allowed back in. Or she might just cover you up and start fingering you right there as they all try desperately to pretend this isn't happening and their life doesn't suck.

♡ M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) ♡

Knowing she has enough time to fully satisfy her desire for you is what gets her going. She's always down for you but she doesn't always have enough time which means that she's going to suppress that desire but the moment she knows she's about to have enough free time she's going for it even if it's towards the end of a meeting and she still should be technically busy.

♡ N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) ♡

She won't let anyone see either of your bodies unless it's someone she's sharing you with but if she's sharing you it has to be with someone she views as having equal importance to her in which case the only two people who have that status and are capable of sharing are The Evil Dragon, or Raphael her most important advisor, they might be allowed to see you naked.

♡ O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) ♡

Even in the omegaverse she never lets you give. She just thinks she'd be bothered if you were to give because then it's more time where she can't taste you or if you are 69ing then you're not fully paying attention to what her tongue is doing and either case is just simply unacceptable, she needs your full undivided attention on what she's doing.

♡ P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) ♡

She never rushes things and she always takes her time, don't worry though even if she's being slow you're still walking away with this experience with more orgasms then you think the human body should possibly be able to handle.

♡ Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) ♡

She doesn't do quickies, it's all or nothing with her and if she knows she won't be able to fully satisfy her desire for you then there's no point even starting anything because it's going to just make her a bit pissy that she had to stop being with you in order to attend some ball that she's supposed to be knighting the candidates that Abigail allowed to pass the test at.

♡ R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) ♡

She's always down to experiment just a little bit as long as in that experiment she can still taste you. Ainsley might bring her nipple clamps that electrocute you a bit just to make you squirt on her face just the slightest bit harder. She still prefers to stick to the tried and true method of eating you out until you start sobbing though.

♡ S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) ♡

She's not going for as long as someone like Ellie but she's still going for quite awhile, she is not stopping ever until she's had your for at the very least five hours, though she may give you a pause in the middle for food and water. So her stamina is pretty good.

♡ T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) ♡

No she prefers to use her fingers and hands on you if you have afab genitals, if you have a dick though then she's going to use a fleshlight on you(only if you tell her you don't want her eating your ass of course) and she'll get one of the really really weird ones that Ainsley makes so it's probably better to just let her eat your ass instead cause you don't want to know what Ainsley might come up with in that demented head of hers.

♡ U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) ♡

She's a bit teasing if you aren't giving her what she wants, if you're squirming away from her she'll let you squirm just enough so her tongue is on you and driving you crazy but not giving you any real release so that way you'll realize squirming is only hurting you in the long run, it's best not to run from the pleasure because it'll only prolong your suffering.

♡ V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) ♡

She comments on everything the whole time she's down there from how much you're squirming to every tiny sound you make to how she's going to make you queen and there's nothing you can do about it, look how weak you are under her right now, she also makes sounds like this is the most delicious thing she has ever eaten, like all the chefs in the palace can be fired because this is all she needs for the rest of her days to satisfy her.

♡ W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) ♡

She gets a little bit turned on feeding you, it's not that she's into feederism or anything, she's not going to make you gain a lot of weight but if you're skinny she's gonna want to feed you enough to make you a bit chubbier and if you're already chubby she'll feed you enough to make sure you stay that way. If you're fit Abigail at least lets you jogging lightly, the most Theanna lets you do as queen is walk with her and dances with her are parties.

♡ X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) ♡

She's got no chest and her legs aren't the best but her arms are very very nice to look at, very muscular and she's got a bit of flab on her stomach so sitting on her lap after she overstimulates you to the brink of insanity is very very nice.

♡ Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) ♡

Not super high, don't get her wrong she loves having you but she can go days without initiating because if she knows she doesn't have time to actually do this thoroughly this so will force any horny thought she has to just disappear, or she'll start fucking you towards the end of a council meeting because sure she's technically busy now but she has hours of freetime after this so what's the harm is starting just a bit early.

♡ Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) ♡

She's not going to fall asleep quick afterwards but she's going to want you to fall asleep quick afterwards. She still has plenty of work that needs to get done but she loves walking into a council meeting with you asleep on her lap as the advisors have to keep their mouth shut about the entire thing. Plus it's just cute to have her darling maid and future queen asleep on her lap.

[yanderes-galore]

I know that tomorrow’s the 17th and that the time period for requests is later in the west, but I had to request it know knowing JoJo’s on the list! Where there is fanfics, I’ll be there. When headcannons are afoot, I will be there!

Anyways, sorry for the ramble on my current hyperfixations. Prompts 3 and 10 for Narancia.

Sure! Sorry this took so long, I was struggling- Hope this works for you... I appreciate feedback!

Yandere! Narancia Prompts 3 + 10

"You'll love me, even if we have to sit and wait for it to happen."

"I've given myself all to you! Yet you call me a monster!"

Pairing: Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Violence, Implied attempted murder/Murder, Manipulation, Clingy behavior, Possessive behavior, Stalking, Overprotective behavior, Fear of abandonment, Angst, Delusional behavior, Forced relationship.

You remember when you first met Narancia. Part of you wishes you could go back to those simpler times. Maybe then you'd be a lot less... stressed.

When you met Narancia you did petty theft. You lived with a relative of yours and you grew up rather poor. You still went to school most of the time... but you barely had enough money to eat.

That's when you met Narancia... a friend who also seemed to be in a bad spot. He felt that the best thing in life and survival is friendship... it's no wonder he befriended you. Friends help each other.

You two became close. Narancia helped you steal to get money and even knew your relative. You two might even be partners in crime.

Then disaster hit.

Your relative was caught and sent to jail. Narancia was set up and also went to jail. Now... now you were all alone with a dwindling food supply.

Soon you dropped out of school. You yourself ended up thriving on the streets. This was your life for years as you grew up.

Soon you yourself ended up signing up for Passione. You needed a job, you needed money, you needed somewhere to go. You were tired of being some sort of street rat.

By some means you pass Polpo's test and gain yourself a stand. This leads you into Passione... where you end up meeting an old friend.

Truthfully you both never thought you'd see each other again...

Maybe it was best you didn't?

Narancia was ecstatic when he saw you again. The other members of Bucciarati's gang were surprised when Narancia leaped onto you with childish joy. You yourself even froze for a moment.

There he was... once again... your friend. You can't help but sadly smile as you hug him back. It was after this you were introduced to the gang.

From there you thought things were rather normal. Narancia hovered around you but that was expected when you catch up. You two talked a lot and the gang noticed Narancia got less angry at times.

Especially during studying with Fugo... his temper goes down to a simmer when you're around eagerly listening to the lesson.

The gang became your family along with Narancia. For a long time you feel happy. There's always moments between the members, both good and bad, but you love it.

Well... loved it... things got strange with Narancia after awhile.

Narancia got more and more clingy with you. At first you assumed it was just him being protective. After all... now he knows how easy it is to lose you.

But now he clings to you as though you'll abandon him. Instead of being calm his aggression spikes when you speak with others. It scares you how fast he pulls his blade on people around you now.

It's as though he's scared they'll take you.

The way Narancia looks at you is so different now. His eyes don't hold that same friendship anymore. Instead it's drowned out with a certain darkness as looks at you.

You hate that he seems to know exactly what you're doing at all times.

You know something's wrong. You just aren't sure how to deal with it. As a result you end up distancing yourself from Narancia. You instead find yourself talking to other people, not just the people in the gang.

It only seems to bring more issues.

You don't realize how far Narancia's gone until he does something drastic. You see him come back from a mission smelling of soot and blood one day. When you ask him what happened...his answer scares you.

"Oh... well I was off on a mission for Bucciarati... then I saw a certain guy you've been talking with... then I got a bit... carried away-"

The thought of what he means scares you. As a result you instead close to the gang more. However... even then it's not enough.

Narancia doesn't even like that anymore.

Soon Narancia corners you in private. You already fear to be around him... but you listen because you're friends, aren't you?

"Do you like me?"

Not anymore....

"Of course I do, Nara, we're friends until the end... always have been-"

"No, not like that. I mean... I want to be your boyfriend. We've been through similar pains, haven't we? ... don't you want to be with me?"

"Narancia..."

"Why have you been ignoring me?"

You curse yourself when he pins you, purple eyes swirling with a certain possessive tinge. Your fear increases when when he tightens his grip. It's then you try to reason....

"Narancia, please-"

"Answer my question..."

"You... you scare me, Nara. You won't let me talk to anyone but you-"

"You aren't supposed to!" He sneers. "You talk to anyone else... I'll lose you again."

"You won't Nara-"

"I need you to be with me... please say you will. I'll do anything!"

"Nara, I can't-" You whisper, trying to push him away.

"What do I need to do? Do I need to kill for you? I've done it before, I'll do it again!"

You pause for a moment, staring at Narancia. He seems to caught up in the moment to realize what he's said. He only pauses when he sees you shaking.

"So that's what happened..." You whisper, thinking of when he came back covered in blood and smelling of fire. "You're a monster..."

Then you see Narancia snap.

"I've given myself all to you! Yet you call me a monster!" Narancia yells, his grip tightening. His temper flares and it causes you to cry a bit. You want to go back to the rest of the gang.

Narancia seems to notice your shivering and sobs. His heart pangs in guilt. He's hurting you...

He's hurting you because he's selfish...

He doesn't want to lose you.

You don't move when Narancia pulls you into a hug. His gaze holds a delusional glint as he holds your shaking figure against him. He loves you too much... too much for his own good.

Why won't you reciprocate?

"You'll love me, even if we have to sit and wait for it to happen." Narancia whispers, kissing the top of your head. To him, he wants no one else.

You two belong to each other...

He's known that since he's met you... this is fate... he just has to be even more patient.

[rainbow--skies]

I don't talk about my food allergies much on here because them being the One Thing half my classmates knew about me growing up and the excessive paranoia my parents shoved on me about them genuinely makes me hate doing so, and I also don't really PERSONALLY consider my allergies a disability (but I have no problem with other people doing so).

However I have noticed that whenever they get included in disability posts on here, it's always by people without food allergies who have barely any idea what the fuck they're talking about. So many people (including people with allergies!) are SO uninformed about how they work and it's worrying so here's some stuff I wish more people knew:

An Epi-Pen does not cure you it helps with some of the symptoms so you can get to the fucking hospital. You still need to go to the fucking hospital.

Food allergies CAN kill you- many people's are not that severe but they CAN kill you. Take them seriously please

Your little "haha people with food allergies are the weakest link" jokes are harmful and offensive and part of why so many people don't take allergies seriously. Stop it. You're not funny. Find a better joke. So many mainstream TV shows even do this it's disheartening

Many people with food allergies also have eczema (I used to when I was younger) or asthma (I don't but I know people who have both), the comorbidities are very common, but not universal

Airborne allergies are not very common at all and usually do not cause severe reactions and it's weird to me that people act like this is common (it kind of feels like excuse to isolate people with food allergies when food is being served sometimes) but if someone has said they do not want to be near their allergen at all you should respect this you do not know what someone's symptoms are

Cross contamination is also something not everyone suffers from (some people have low level allergies) but many of us do (including me) and you should not get offended if someone doesn't accept food they can't see ingredients/health info for or homemade food for that reason

You can be allergic to any food to any degree- people seem to have this weird misconception that it's just peanuts, nuts, dairy, eggs, and other more publicized foods but that's not true at all

If it's possible, ask people what they would prefer as an accommodation when food is being served PLEASE. Some of us would rather eat before, some would rather bring food, some would rather alternative options be offered or restaurants they can eat at be chosen. Some are fine sitting near people eating stuff we can't, some would rather sit in a separate space, and some would rather if the food was just not eaten when they are present at all. Myself and many others that I know actually would rather sit next to someone eating something we can't because it doesn't actually affect us to be near them if we're careful enough not to touch it than to sit at separate "allergen free" tables and such because it's a socially isolating experience, but there are people who would feel more comfortable eating away from others and this is okay too.

Many of us are only allergic to one or two things, some are allergic to a ton

There are less common types of allergies that don't follow the typical pattern of food allergies- as an example I have some allergies that come from oral allergy syndrome, which basically means that my seasonal allergies to certain types of pollen makes me slightly allergic to some fruits and vegetables too

Food allergies can sometimes randomly develop in teenagers and adults, they are not always there from birth or early childhood like many people think (though it's incredibly common for them to start that early). There is not a guarantee you will never get one but your chances are higher if your family has a history of them. Sometimes they can go away or decrease in severity over time too, though, but that does NOT happen to everybody

Lactose intolerance and Celiac Disease are not food allergies! They are separate conditions with separate symptoms and needs! Please educate yourselves about those too and not assume they are synonymous with food allergies

[smimon]

😮‍💨😮‍💨

Maybe the reason I always sucked at PE isn't that I'm just bad at having a body. Maybe that was just because I was always hungry.

Oh fuck, I need to get this out. You know why I was always hungry at school?

Every day my mom packed me one cheese sandwich for the whole day. And at some point in elementary school, the cheese sandwich became unexplainably disgusting to me and I couldn't eat it anymore.

When I told her, she reminded me that I like cheese and told me to stop being ridiculous. And it's true, I love cheese, but having exactly the same sandwich every day for years will finally make your body reject it, even if it's your favourite flavour.

(I might also have some medical issue with digesting fat and that cheese she used was very fat, I still have to get a diagnosis here)

So mother kept packing me the same sandwich every day, and I couldn't eat it most of the time. When I got hungry, I would try to eat it, but even looking at it made me lose all appetite. Sometimes I forced myself to eat it because I knew I need some fucking food, but just one bite made me feel sick.

I kept bringing the sandwiches back home, and every few days mother was taking them out of my bag, some already moldy, and just looked at me disapprovingly without saying a word. And then she packed me a new one.

She made it clear that I won't get anything else to eat because in her opinion a cheese sandwich is the perfect lunch, and I am not eating it specifically to make her look bad. She also assumed I was stuffing myself with snacks from the school store, even though I did not even receive pocket money.

A few times I asked if she could put something else in my sandwich for a change, and she snapped at me that what else could she possibly use for a sandwich? I suggested ham maybe (I wasn't that good at making sandwiches but I was just a kid ok) and she just rolled her eyes because ham is too expensive and cheese is cheap and I like cheese and this discussion is pointless and I'm only trying to make her angry 🙃 (same when I asked if I could get dinner at school canteen - she won't spend money on food if I can get dinner after school)

In middle school I learned how to press my stomach so it doesn't growl, I didn't want to hear it during tests, it was just so embarrassing.

(Then I went to boarding school at the age 15 and started getting five meals a day and the world suddenly started to seem like a nice place)

And this is probably the main reason I can't really trust her with any problems, as every time I tried to tell her about anything she just said this wouldn't be a problem to her if she was me, and I should just stop having this problem, and I am probably having it on purpose of just making things up to bother her because she is a good mother who has everything under control so if she says I have no real problems then I am not allowed to have problems.

Also the reason I still struggle to talk to anyone else about my problems up to this day, because there was no other adult in my life who I could talk to, and my friends were just kids so they couldn't really help me, they only felt sad, and I don't want them to be sad so I just kept quiet.

It's all connected you know. My inability to talk about my problems, leading to internalizing, then having them resurface in my writing. Trust issues, communication issues, eating disorders. Shame, alienation, worthlessness. But I'm already healing.

My mother basically said "fake it till you make it" and never asked for anyone's help with parenting, even though she should.

Oh and in high school I finally had fun at PE, because we had two hours weekly of a sport we chose individually, and I picked handball because I love handball. I still sucked at it (probably from never having been able to learn how to move properly) but I had fun anyway (I don't play to win, I play to move okay) and I guess it's not a coincidence it was at the same time when I started to get, you know, nutrition.

[theamityelf]

28 for prowlerbyte? 👀👀

28. "your smile brings me so much joy."

(Okay, I brought this on myself, but forgive me if I don't have Prowler Miles' characterization down. Also, I ran out of steam when it came to trying to actually incorporate the line in the dialogue, but the vibe/sentiment of it is definitely there!)

~~~

Their first one-on-one conversation happened in the food court back at Headquarters.

Nearly everyone who had taken part in the day's (huge, exhausting) battle was there, but most of them had crashed before their food even arrived. Meaning, rather than a comfortable group of all five people who had crammed into the booth together, it was just Margo and Miles 42 eating their food in silence while Malala Windsor, Lego Peter Parker, and Peter Porker snored unhelpfully two feet away from them.

But it was a comfortable silence. Because they were both starving.

And once they had eaten their fill, it came to light that they both had the same favorite TV show.

Sort of.

They were from different universes, so it was more like they both liked shows with the exact same template and extremely similar character names but different everything-else. Which was even better, because who wouldn't want to binge a slightly-warped version of a show they already liked?

"Waitwaitwait, so Cassian and Luxer never kill each other in your world?" Miles demanded, his eyes piercing and invested.

"No!" Margo exclaimed, struggling to keep her ecstatic energy at bay. "They literally talked it out! Yours killed each other?! When?!"

"Season 2 finale, at the abandoned chemical plant! One scene after Dallas becomes king of the Society of Mages!"

"Okay, first of all, in mine Dallas is Dalia, and second of all Dalia never gets the respect she deserves! Caspian and Lucius are literally allowed to walk all over her while she does spells for them whenever they ask. In mine, Season 2 ends with her confronting the Society of Mages and them basically excommunicating her."

"Word?! I'm almost more mad about that than Cassian and Luxer killing each other."

"In mine, they kiss in Season 3. They weren't endgame, though. There was this thing with the actors- and they say it wasn't the reason, but it seriously seemed like it was..."

Margo didn't notice the way Miles' face softened as he watched her ramble. The passion in her raised voice, the barely-suppressed laughter, the adorably spastic gestures of her hands as she raced through the overview of actor drama and coinciding plot points-

"Oh," she suddenly broke off, having accidentally kicked him under the table. "Sorry about that. Usually I'm a hologram when I'm here, so I don't have to be as aware of my surroundings." She took a bite of her quesadillas before continuing, "But yeah, they nerfed Caspian hard after the Season 3 finale..."

Miles hid a smile by drinking more of his soda. In his own universe, he didn't spend a lot of time with people his own age. Unlike Spider Miles, he wasn't enrolled in any fancy science school, and thanks to a heaping helping of unaddressed emotional baggage, his time at public school had mostly amounted to devoting minimal attention to classes that felt kindergarten-easy and keeping his cool when bigger guys thought his lanky frame meant they got to start something.

"I can't tell if your world's version of the show sounds slightly better or slightly worse," he mused, "but I think I want to watch all of it."

"Oh, I fully plan to binge yours at the first opportunity."

"Well..." He tried out the charming voice he'd learned from Uncle Aaron. "We both have wristbands. If you want, you could...swing by my universe sometime, you know..."

"Yeah! We gotta meet up. I..." She grimaced. "If you want to watch it in my world, too, we'll probably have to do it somewhere other than my house, but I can make it happen."

"Well, it's a date." And he seamlessly concealed the sudden rush of embarrassment at his impulsive statement by taking a huge bite of his food.

"Technically right now it's just a concept," Margo teased. "It's a date when we have a date and time."

"If we want to watch the whole show in both worlds, how about Tuesday at 7 we watch three episodes of my version, then Thursday at 7 three episodes of your version?"

"Alternating as we go? That'll be trippy; I love it." With a grin, she added, "Now it's a date."

And he was not fighting back a smile. He was just drinking his drink. The Prowler did not have butterflies in his stomach. No indeed. "'Swing by' was a pun, you know."

"Oh, shoot. That one snuck by me."

"It prowled by."

"I was about to-! You didn't give me time to say it!"

"Too slow. I thought you spider people were supposed to be fast."

"Oh, you just keep talkin'. Season 3's gonna hit you like a truck."

[cedar-sunshine]

Star Excerpt

I've been going back and forth on posting this for a while, but here it is! Feat: Tristan being depressed, Ori being a little off-putting. This is the VERY beginning of star, the opening words. Comment if you want me to post more anytime/if you liked it!

TWs- internalized transphobia (not incredibly overt), discussion of SI, discussion of death, discussion and minor representation of visual hallucinations.

I wrote this when I was dealing with REALLY severe depression and it hasn't been seriously edited since, so I can't vouch for it being great. Hope you enjoy it!

Tristan

It's getting cold faster than usual this year.

It feels like just yesterday that the first couple of leaves fell from the maples, but now I'm walking over ground that cracks and snaps with frost, and my breath hangs in the air like fog.

With hope, the coming winter will pass just as quickly as fall has been, collapsing in on itself in what remains of my mind. Realistically, I'll probably die before that can happen. The main question now is whether I'll die from the sickness, starvation, hypothermia, murder, or the other option. Guessing which one is going to finally take me out is the only thing left in my life that I could call entertaining, in a twisted, fucked up way. There's also a chance I eat the wrong plant and die from poisoning, but I'd argue that that falls under the last option, especially as I've practically memorized the plants in the northwest. It's been my only pastime for the past year and a half, if you don't count vivid fantasies of my own impending death.

You're never really aware of all the interesting ways one can die until you are, aren't you?

As it is, I've decided that my most likely fate will be turning back on my trail, finding the people who I've been running from with less and less conviction for the past eight months, and letting myself be ripped to pieces in whatever horrifying fashion they desire. It wouldn't be much worse than what's going on in my head already, I'd guess. And they'd be right in whatever gruesome thing they have planned for me. It's not like I haven't been asking for this since I ran.

I'm not exactly sure where I'm going, other than a vague idea of 'east'. If I even have the direction right. For all I know, I've been going in circles for months. I can see the mountains in the distance, though, so I can't be too far off. I know the silhouette of the rockies.

My half-formed plan when I first fled was to get to the rockies and find refuge in a cave, gathering food like a bear in the fall, and then count on my pursuers not being able to survive in the mountains. I'm not sure why I had thought that a half-dead, psychotic fifteen year old with identity confusion would survive out there any better than they would, but it's the only plan I have, and without a plan, I don't really have much to do other than sit down and die.

Honestly, that option has been sounding pretty nice lately.

Still, I'm nothing if not a creature of inertia. Every step, every breath, every heartbeat, only exists because I've lost the energy to do anything other than stay the same. What is in motion stays in motion, even as the friction of my brain tears at me to just stop.

I'm not sure why I don't.

The sun is bleeding up from the horizon, lighting the clouds near it a pinkish golden color, bringing color to a gray sky. The mountains are saturated with dark, vivid blue shadows and patches of gleaming white snow that hurts to look at.

The light burns my eyes, and I refocus my gaze on the ground in front of me where brown and orange leaves are encased in frost, crunching under my footsteps. With the frost, I'll be leaving pretty clear footsteps until the sun fully rises, but I can't bring myself to care. A brutal, ritualistic death, no matter how gory and painful, seems no worse than the other option.

I try to avoid thinking about the future. Whenever I do, the pull to just stop gets almost overwhelming, and the panic that causes makes everything around it worse. The stability of my mind is nothing but a coin flip, and when it's landed on heads, I try to do all I can to avoid flipping it again.

Still, the future isn't the most avoidable thing.

As I watch my worn-out shoes leave a trail in the frost and leaves, my thoughts can't help but drift towards one of my many taboo subjects.

What happens next is perhaps the scariest question I can pose to myself, mostly because I don't actually know the answer.

I can feel my pulse lift and the fog of my mind start to thicken and creep towards the lucidity I've held for almost a week now, if you ignore the flashes of blood and corpses that don't exist hanging from trees in the edges of my vision. My hands clench and unclench, fingers racing along my palms, ruined nails scratching at my rough skin.

It's not proper for a girl to have such un-ladylike hands.

It's not proper for a girl to cut her hair and hide in the woods on her own, either, is it?

Perhaps the question of what's proper for a girl isn't the most important thing right now.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm my burning mind. This part of the forest doesn't have as much undergrowth as usual- notably, it's missing the rampant salal and huckleberries that I've been seeing around here, along with the old growth trees and logs that scaffold the way for smaller plants. I'd guess that it was clear-cut before the disaster, and is maybe five years out from it.

I wonder if the forest knows that it's safe now, that the power tools are dead and the constant consumerist demand has died with most of the world's population. I wonder if its trauma will live on in its occupants, teaching its deer to flee at any movement and its flowers to hide in the deepest, thickest tangles of plants. I wonder if it knows that the world has changed. Maybe it can feel that the human feet that used to trample it have lessened, and maybe it feeds on the corpses and can taste their disease and fear. Perhaps it remains unaware, always living in fear of the next hunting season or the return of the lumber companies and hikers who tear up the native plants and bring with them grasses and Himalayan blackberries. Perhaps it can see me walking through its trees and it wonders what a child so clearly unfit for this life is doing. Perhaps it waits for me to give up and die, so it can welcome me to its soil and bring me home. Perhaps it sees me as only another of the ones that have torn it from its roots and killed its children and brothers, and it only feels distrust and hatred. Perhaps it still wishes I would give up and die, but only so my threatening existence ends.

Perhaps it's just wood and leaves, and I've truly lost what's left of my mind.

I wonder what it thinks of me, if it looks beyond my humanness and sees that the blood running through my veins is the same as what pulses in its children, a cousin of the golden sap that bleeds from its bark. I wonder who it sees.

A girl with rough hands and a shattered mind, maybe. Or a boy who's met death and come back, rather unwillingly. Maybe it only sees a scared child running blindly, or an animal that sacrificed its humanity to keep its straining, breaking heart beating in its chest. Maybe something else entirely, something that's fading away from the inside out and barely even still going.

I wonder who I would see, if I was brave enough to look.

Orion

I go over the bear trap one last time, making sure that it's not being blocked by anything. It's on its last legs, rusty and creaky. It's not a pretty beast, but it does the job, even if the job might give me tetanus one day. I don't really have another option right now, so I choose to remain positive. I have it set on a rough game trail, with the jaws and trigger covered in vines and leaves. I've got a camp set up in a small cave by a cliff less than a mile from the trap, so I can check it every evening, along with the rope ones that I have on other trails. With luck, I'll get something in a couple days, hopefully big enough to last me through the winter. I dream of the day when I get a moose in my traps.

Once I get a catch, I can dry the meat for the winter, and then next spring I'll keep going east and get over the mountains. The east of the mountains is more habitable than the west, so I'll keep looking for a town of survivors there.

I know that there are people out there, and I know that those people have probably grouped up and started rebuilding societies. It'll take a bit to convince them that I'm not sick, and that I'm not there to steal their resources, but I know I can do it. People like me. I like to think that I've held on to most of my charm through what I can only really describe as the apocalypse. Maybe I'll start a family, if I meet someone there who's sweet and pretty, someone who thinks I am too. Maybe we can find a stray dog and live a small, nice life. I just need to take it step by step, and the next step is finding food.

I've always wished that I knew a bit more about plants, especially since the sickness hit and I've been doing this all on my own. I know the basics- thimbleberries, chanterelles, cedar- but not much more than that. I think it'd be helpful to be one of those people who can dig food from the ground during winter. I'm dealing, though. Perhaps a diet consisting mainly of meat isn't the healthiest thing, but I'd say that I'm actually doing pretty well, given the whole apocalypse situation.

The cliff that I've made my temporary home in is only maybe ten or fifteen feet tall, on the base of a relatively steep hill. The cave's entrance is much shorter than me, but if I crouch, I can get in and into the more sizable inner part, where I still can't really stand up. I have coils of rope shoved into a corner, and I toss my beat-up backpack on top of them before sitting on my equally used sleeping bag. It's developed rips and holes that make it not much more useful than a warm blanket, but a warm blanket is still something.

I've adopted a crepuscular lifestyle more recently, altering my waking time to match that of the wildlife. I set my traps early in the morning and check them long after the sun sets. It took me a bit, but I get around five hours of sleep every time I try, amounting to maybe ten every day. I spend the rest of my time either maintaining my body or fantasizing about the town I'll find in eastern Washington. It's not the most exciting life, but it's nice to have some routine in a world like this.

I don't feel very tired yet, so I pull over my backpack and dump its contents on the base of the cave, searching through them. My two extra knives are tied together with a worn out length of twine, along with my flint in its' case, and my bunched-up, too-large raincoat unfolds on the ground, along with a medley of other things, but it only takes me a few moments to find what I was looking for.

When I was a kid, I got three journals for one of my birthdays. I wrote through one of them before the virus hit, and the second one was finished frantically in the first few months. Those two will be burnt to ashes when I have the time, kindling soaked with things that aren't worth remembering. The one I've been using for the past year or so is about halfway through, with my ideas and feelings journaled about once a week. Most of it is plans, maps, paths over the mountains, dotted with records of where I set traps. I'm no artist, but I've sketched out ideas of what a surviving society might look like. Abstract maps are my strength.

I flip to a new page and pull my pencil out of the inner pocket on my backpack, and begin writing.

When I wake in the evening, my head rests uncomfortably on my open journal, with a messy, half finished list of the steps I'll need to take to get over the rockies. My spine aches from being curled up like a dead shrimp for hours, and when I stretch it cracks more than I think should be healthy. It's colder than it was in the morning, but I push myself to get up and shove my stuff back into my bag.

The sky is gray outside, and the air is that sort of sharp cold that hurts a bit to breathe. Every inhale reminds me that winter is soon, and that I'll be over the rockies by this time next year. Maybe I'll even have found my survivors by then, and I'll have my little life set up. I'm sure any little budding village would be happy to have a young member with trapping knowledge, someone who can contribute and still has his whole life ahead of him.

The trail I've set my traps on takes about two hours to fully complete, and a bit more with my care to avoid my own traps. I've made that mistake once, and I never plan to make it again.

The bear trap is surprisingly well hidden for a metal jaw in the leaves- its rust blends in with the leaves scattered over it, and if I wasn't aware of its existence and studying every step I take, there's a good chance I'd lose a leg to it. I feel a twinge of apology for whatever poor thing gets caught in my trap, but we all need to eat. Anyways, it's probably no more violent than any of the other ways a thing could die out here.

I return to my little cave as the first couple of raindrops start hitting the leaves, and I curl up in my sleeping bag to stay warm as I watch the rain fall.

It's hypnotizing, in a way. The quiet roar is the loudest thing in the woods, and it drowns out any other sound. Within half an hour, the rain has turned from a gentle patter to a downpour, turning the world gray outside of the cave. The cave has a helpful slant that keeps the water from running down to where I'm sitting, but the cold still ends up saturating my skin, soaking through me just as quickly as the rain would.

I lie down and turn away from the cave entrance. There's no better time to sleep than during a rainstorm.

☆☆☆

That's chapter one of star! Thanks for reading (:

[vanikolya]

Hi, you do x readers, right? Can i ask for some relationship Hc for spaceboy?

cw: none

reader info: they/them, no gendered terms used

notes: i love him so much ty for this request!! i call him halkenna / kenna in this sinceee it's his original name, you can google for more info if you want it since i'd like to keep this note short but it's not too hard to find if you just search "halkenna fairway" &lt;33 also to the person who requested something similar, i'll still probably be writing a oneshot for you! you'll have to bear with me though as i haven't written anything other than headcanons for a while

SPACE BOYFRIEND / HALKENNA FAIRWAY RELATIONSHIP HCS

his main love language is physical touch so he's very touchy if you're comfortable with it, lots of hugs and kisses and hand holding

the type of person to be like cuddling with you in a morning and get all whiney when you try to get up and he's still half asleep, until you get back into bed or have him begrudgingly accept that you have plans and things to do and you have to be up etc etc

expanding on the previous point a little, i feel like he's not really the type to have many lie ins? idk i feel like being a space pirate captain is kind of a busy, "get up early" kind of ordeal especially if he and his crew have something planned

but especially if you're not always one for adventures and you decide to stay home sometimes, kenna will probably end up being extremely clingy with you when he gets back and spends the time he can to relax with you and have lie ins where he can just cuddle with you since there's nothing exactly impending he has to sort out

probably second is quality time fr kenna will jump at the chance to spend time doing things with you, most often he will also invite you on his funny little space adventures unless he knows it's going to be something dangerous (although fair play if he knows you could handle yourself there)

although aside from adventures i seem to have convinced myself that kenna likes playing videogames despite the fact i'm not even sure if he'd 100% canonically have any lmao i forgot if they're ever mentioned to be a thing in the dream world but oh well

"YES I WON AGAIN OMG" and then kenna's there being all proud of you for winning as if he wasn't consistently being distracted by how excited you were whilst playing the game with him so technically it was an easy win but he's not going to tell you that so-

he will like bring you cool things from other planets he goes to, like especially if you're a "collects little trinkets" type of person (im guilty of this ;u;), like cool little crystal things and stuff, or just things that he can reasonably bring back that reminded him of you

i feel like he can't cook because he's like never really had to? like he has his dad who woulda looked after him as a kid and then he inherited his position from his dad so he'd probably have people in his crew who cook for him now, or he just exclusively eats out or eats pre-packaged foods (wow i went on a little tangent here) but like yeah if you cooked for him even like just once he'd adore it so much, even if it was just like the simplest meal you've made in your life

he doesn't leave you alone when you're sick, of course unless you want alone time, but otherwise he is just completely unfazed by "but you might get sick too if you're staying with me for so long" and more concerned with keeping you company and making sure you're okay and looking after you

this one's kind of a given but he writes you music!! he's probably a little shy at first about showing you because what if you don't like it or what if you think he's being too much and it weirds you out? that doubt is completely gone after the first time he shows you something he's written for you though

he has. he has a little notebook he just carries around with him and it's like one of his most treasured possessions fr because he writes little snippets of things that could become song lyrics or he writes little ideas for "oh this song could sound like this" except it's just like the most wholesome thing because ever since you two started dating it's mostly just been like cute romantic stuff and like "i like (name) i like them a lot and this song is about them brrrrr <333" sjdhsjdsjd

gives you his cape to like use as a blanket (wrap around yourself, drape on your shoulders etc) if you're like waiting somewhere for something and its cold, even though it's not exactly the best solution but at least it's some kind of solution i suppose and he's trying sjdjdjd

also btw just know he'd probably go to the ends of the universe for you or something if you ever needed anything so don't hesistate to communicate about anything you need (i say, having communication issues myself help sjdjfjdd) i don't think he actually has the capability to ever see you as a burden

also goes pretty much the same with how he'd defend you with his life if he ever needed to go that far

you probably had your first kiss after some particularly precarious space adventure, either when kenna came home or when you had a peaceful moment if you were there with him, idk the whole "i know we've been taking things slowly but we could have lost each other today" type thing

but now at this point he will literally just pepper you with kisses whenever he gets the chance like fr he's literally just- most affectionate man to ever have lived. has also probably like kissed the back of your hand all fancy like or swept you up into his arms and kissed you all dramatically at least twice

you've seen how he reacted to a breakup now imagine how wholesomely dramatic he can get when he's actually in a relationship

he's also a really good listener!! he loves hearing you talk about your interests as well as listening if you have a problem- your happiness is his happiness so as mentioned earlier with the "ends of the universe" thing he won't hesitate to try to help with anything

do the same for him tho okay :(( he needs holding gently both physically and emotionally after his whole ordeal with sweetheart

i have no idea why i left this until so far down but space related (ig) pet names for each other are a must, like starlight and moonbeam and i don't actually have any others to hand rn those two just live in my brain rent free. also expect a lot of likely cheesy compliments of the same nature like "i've been travelling this universe my entire life and you're still the brightest star i've ever seen"

[ishouldbedoinghw]

You Can't Erase Me

One Piece Fanfic, Part 5

Previous parts are in my pinned masterlist.

A woman enslaved by the celestial dragons is found by a man with red hair. Angst ensues.

A/N: This story will follow the canon loosely; some events will stay the same, others will be edited for the plot. The timing of events will also be slightly edited from canon so that certain characters are included. The main character is an OC of mine and in her mid-20s. Yes this is important. Character design will likely come soon.

TW: discussion of trauma, general angst, Shanks,

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My world stayed confined to that room at first, Hongo bringing me food and examining me daily. The medicine he gave me kept the pain in my back down to a dull twinge, and he changed the bandage occasionally, cleaning it as he did so. He kept silent at first, then over time, as we continued our little daily ritual, he talked more and more. It was mostly complaining about Shanks or other members of the crew, or muttering about how each of the treatments he gave me worked. He seemed nervous to mention he and the crew were all pirates, but as I wasn't sure I knew what a pirate was, I couldn't find a reason to care. I enjoyed listening to him chat, and tried picturing each of the crew members when he spoke of them.

I didn't reply often, choosing instead to listen in silence. It wasn't that I wasn't curious, I simply didn't want to irritate him.

True to his word, Shanks returned to the room every now and then, mostly cracking jokes, bugging Hongo, and occasionally asking me questions. He was certainly more talkative than the grumpy doctor, and seemed to be on a personal mission to make me laugh. He hadn't managed it yet, but he never faltered with the corny jokes, often more stupid than funny.

I grew comfortable in my new routine; I'd wake up from a deep, dreamless sleep to Hongo waiting with a plate of food, ready to check me over. I'd eat my fill and listen to him "bitchin'," as Shanks called it, about whatever crew member had already irked him that morning. When it wasn't Shanks, it was Yasopp or Lucky Roux. Hongo often complained about them being too loud or too messy, but I couldn't help but wish I could hear the life he described outside the door.

The one question I'd dared to ask was in regards to my hearing, to which Hongo replied as gently as he could that he really didn't know if there was anything he could do to help.

Under his watchful eye, I slowly started moving around more, feeding myself with ease, and even walking around, though I couldn't hold myself up for long periods of time. Often, when he was gone, I would creep up to the door and strain to listen. Occasionally, I'd catch some muffled conversation or laughter, or heavy footsteps. I quickly learned how to discern Hongo's or Shanks's gaits, and would quickly retreat to bed if I heard them approach - Hongo didn't exactly like it when I roamed around without him.

What I wanted to hear the most, however, was the sea. The only clue I had that I was even on a ship was occasional rocking or the creaking of wood.

I wasn't sure how, but I knew that the sea was salty, and I could recall some feeling of wind blowing my hair and the smell of salt and fish. As I felt the short, prickly hairs on my head, I wondered if the memory was real, or some fantasy I'd made up on my own.

With each passing day, I had more and more questions about who I was, and where I really came from. There had to have been a before the cage that I just couldn't recall - but what was it?

Was my hair long once? Did I have a family? How old was I? What was my name? Why did I like sea king meat better than squid? Had I always preferred one over the other? Why had I been in that cage? When had I been put there?

The muddle of questions in my head was always confusing. It felt a bit stupid to wonder about things like my hair when I couldn't even remember how old I was, or if I had parents. I constantly stared at the wall across from my bed, trying to picture myself with parents or siblings, seeing which combination of the two made the most sense.

I had to have parents, the picture in my head always had a mom and a dad. I would've sworn up and down I had a brother, it didn't feel right to not imagine one. Sisters were the one thing I couldn't grasp at all- or maybe I was wrong about all of it, maybe I never had a family and my life had always been the cage, maybe I hadn't come from any place of love, like I pictured a real family to be. Had I ever been given a hug? Had my mother ever kissed me goodnight? Had I ever played with other children? Did I ever have friends? It made me sick to my stomach to think the only person that had ever touched me was that man- no, Hongo and Shanks touched me.

Touched me because they had to? Or did they really want to?

I groaned, leaning my head back and pinching the bridge of my nose.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

One, two, three, four.

Four, seven; seven, four.

What did these damn numbers mean? Why couldn't I get them out of my head? Were they important?

Counting to them was soothing, at the very least. The itch that they meant something wouldn't go away, but I found comfort in repeating them regardless.

The door slammed open, making me jump.

"Hey, girlie." It was Hongo, and he seemed a bit more cheerful than usual. "Ship's empty, and you reek. Since you can move around, I figured you'd like to wash up."

"I'm leaving this room? Going out the door?" I blurted before I could stop myself.

Hongo seemed to grimace a bit. "I guess I'd go stir crazy looking at the same four walls, huh? Sorry, girlie, I should've known you wouldn't like being all cooped up like this."

He seemed lost in thought as he held out his arm for me. I gripped his forearm tightly, and for a moment I was surprised to feel nothing but thick muscle under the doctor's skin. It would make sense, I reasoned, that he would be ridiculously strong - he was a pirate.

But how did I know pirates were strong?

I held my breath as he opened the door and we stepped out into the hallway. The sight was - a bit anticlimactic, but it didn't do much to quell my excitement.

The ship wasn't rocking too badly today, I noted, and the lack of a crew made me wonder if we were docked somewhere.

That's a stupid thought, where would the crew even go if we weren't docked.

I flushed in silent embarrassment. Hongo didn't notice, only looking down at me if I stumbled.

The bathroom wasn't anything extravagant, but I was giddy to see it anyway. It sported the same wooden walls of my room, with a row of showers along one side. A white tub stood alone against the opposite wall, and a row of sinks I wasn't sure I could even reach stretched directly opposite the doorway.

"I cleaned it best I could for you," Hongo said as he led me to the tub. "To be honest, I'm not sure how many of the crew members even bathe regularly, so it doesn't get too dirty anyways."

He left me leaning on the side of the tub as he strode quickly over to one of the sinks, retrieving a fluffy towel and a couple of bottles.

He looked a bit sheepish as he set everything down on the tub's rim.

"I got these for you - didn't think you'd want to use our shit."

"Thank you."

He looked a little surprised to hear me so eager, but seemed pleased nonetheless.

"Let me take your bandaging off, I can replace it when you're done."

My fingers were fidgety as I held the back of my shirt up for him, eager to get out of my grimy clothes. He worked quickly, balling up the bandaging in his fist. when he was done.

"I'll leave you to it - yell if you need anything." and he was out the door.

It seemed a little silly to be excited over something like a bath, but as I turned the knobs attached to the faucet, I found it hard to contain my excitement. As the tub filled with warm, steaming water, I shakily undressed myself, tossing the ratty shirt and shorts to the ground. For some reason, it struck me as odd to not be wearing anything underneath, but I shook the feeling away as I lowered myself oh-so-carefully into the water.

It was a tad too hot, but I groaned in pleasure at the sensation anyway. I soaked up the warmth and relaxed my limbs completely, sinking down and submerging my body in the water. I stayed like that for a while before grabbing one of the bottles Hongo had left.

Strawberry scented shampoo. For sun-damaged hair.

I let out a small giggle. I had hardly any hair, but I couldn't help but lather it over my scalp anyway, reveling in the feeling. The other bottle was also strawberry-scented, and I studied every inch of skin I could see as I scrubbed my body.

The bruising around my hips was a dull yellow-green now, and any scratches I'd gotten were barely visible. I had a dark birthmark on my right calf, and I counted seven or so dark dots over my torso and legs. My feet were calloused, and the skin around my neck felt rougher than it should be.

The thing that drew in my attention the most, however, was the odd pattern of white scars that stretched over the top of my right thigh. For some odd reason, I couldn't shake the feeling that I'd seen these marks before, and as I pressed and pinched on the skin, I tried to see what shapes they seemed to make.

Over a dozen little scars, three separate groups of them. As I leaned in closely, stretching the skin to make the color clearer, I choked.

They were letters.

J. I could make out a capital J. I tried to convince myself I was seeing things and making a big deal out of nothing, but the more I looked at the little scratches, the more prominent the letter became. It had to be J.

The next little group was so obvious I could've slapped myself. E.

J. E. H? The last few scratches were messier, two vertical, parallel lines with a large, perpendicular slash through them.

What did they stand for? Were they initials? Something else?

No- H didn't seem right. I felt it in my bones that H wasn't right. I pressed my lips together, studying the marks.

My blood went cold. TT. It was TT. J E T T.

J E T T. JETT. It had to be. What was JETT? What did it mean? Was it an initial, as I'd thought before?

JETT. Jett-

I screamed. I screamed until there was no air left in my lungs, and my throat ached. I clamored out of the tub, trembling and grabbing the towel, wrapping it around myself before I crumbled to the floor.

"HONG-" I didn't even have to finish before Shanks burst through the door, chest heaving. My head went fuzzy as I met his gaze, and my eyes grew heavy. I felt forced to the floor, about to lose consciousness- and then nothing. The feeling simply left, and I struggled to push myself upward again.

"Spooky! Look at me, are you hurt? What's wrong-"

"Nothing," I rasped, struggling to form words. "Shanks, I-" I tried to swallow, but my throat seemed to stick to itself.

"Shit, I overdid it, I'm so sorry," Shanks knelt next to me, holding me upright and scanning me over.

I steadied my breathing, then gripped the arm holding me.

"I know my name," I choked out finally, "My name is Jett."

Shanks visibly relaxed, settling on the floor a bit. Not even a full minute had passed when he started laughing. Full on witch-like cackling, as if I'd just said the funniest thing in the world.

He didn't speak when he finally stopped, he just withdrew his hand from me to shrug off his coat and sling it around me. I had barely registered that he only had one arm when he pulled me toward him, crushing me into his chest.

I didn't understand why I started sobbing. I was so unbelievably happy, but I couldn't stop hot tears form pouring down my already-soaked face.

Shanks leaned down and pressed a kiss onto the top of my head, squeezing me tighter.

"Nice to meet ya, Jett."

[ourlittlevampire]

Imagine Early Sunsets Over Monroeville but it's Mikey getting turned into a zombie. There's no way Gerard would be able to bring himself to kill Mikey, even when he's in that state. He lets him live, trapping him in his basement room so he can't hurt him. For weeks he stays in their childhood home slowly running out of food. Gerard is also slowly losing his mind. He's used to being alone and not going outside, that's not the problem. The problem is that Mikey won't shut up. His little brother is constantly growling, moaning and banging around down there at all hours of the day. He can't sleep with that sound. He can't sleep because he's starving. He wishes Mikey would just shut up. He doesn't know why he's making that much noise. He wasn't like that a couple weeks ago, when he had first turned.

Starving, Gerard realised. Mikey is starving, just like him. He knew what those shambling things outside ate. Watched them attempt to do that with his beloved brother. It made him shudder just to think about. But what if Mikey didn't eat? He couldn't claim to know the first thing about. He didn't know if they could starve to death. What he did know was that the zombies he saw outside seemed to be less now. Maybe they had just moved on from New Jersey... or maybe they had eaten all the humans they could and starved to death.

Coming out of his thoughts, Gerard suddenly realised that the house was quiet. Quiet for the first time since his brother had first turned. He had an overwhelming feeling that something was wrong. Against his better judgment, he unbarricaded the door to the basement. It was so dark in there. All of his stuff was thrown around, his precious comic books torn to pieces. He would be furious, if he wasn't more focused on his little brother sprawled out on top of those shredded comics.

"Mikey?" He called out, concern rising in his voice. At the sound of his voice, the zombified man lifted his head. It looked like it took all of his strength to do so. He growled weakly, a hand barely twitching toward him.

This wasn't good. When he'd gotten Mikey into this room, he had had to beat him off with a broom. His little brother had been strong, almost stronger than him. Now he couldn't even get up. His little brother had always been skinny, but his body underneath the shreds of his t-shirt looked positively emaciated.

Mikey was starving to death. He knew that now. But what could he do? Feed himself to Mikey?

That thought played inside his mind for an uncomfortable amount of time. He was only pulled out of it when he heard screaming. Human screams. In the early days of the infection, it hadn't been uncommon to hear suffering. Now, though, it was something startling. He rushed upstairs and looked outside.

A woman, a relatively young one, was on the street outside of his house. She was covered in blood and holding a hand to her side. She was screaming for help as she limped down the lane. He didn't know what had happened to her, but she was probably bit. He already had one zombie to deal with, he didn't need another. Gerard moved from the window, content to be a bystander. Then, he rethought.

Gerard opened the front door. He cautiously peeked out. Surprisingly, no zombies around.

"Hey!" He called out. "Are you bit?" He asked.

The woman whorled around to look at him. Relief washed over her face. She started coming towards him.

"No!" She replied. "I cut myself climbing through a window." She moved her hand to show a giant gash in her tank top. He couldn't really see the wound, but all that blood did not look promising. "Do you have any medical supplies?" She asked.

"Yes.... They're down in the basement." He replied.

-

The screams had been horrible. It was worth it, though, to ensure his little brother would stay alive. He could hear him banging around down in his former room once more. He just hoped Mikey wouldn't get hungry again any time soon.

[umihoshi]

some tips for people who just started living on their own

It's been 4 years now, and I'm not regretting a single day that I moved out. No more adapting to what my parents want, no more reporting where I'm going or who I'm bringing over, I can create my save haven the way I like it. For me, it was really the start of becoming myself.

But, there's a bunch of stuff here and there that would've been nice if I had known it from the get-go. And I thought: let's share them!

1 what appliances to invest in?

one thing that is going to come back every single day is cooking. and food is expensive AF if you're not careful. I found 2 great ways to save a bunch of money and they both rely on one thing: Invest in a good freezer! Many grocery stores have systems where they price down things that are close to the shelf life date. One of our local grocery stores can go up to 70% discount! But the problem with those is, you need to eat it right away.... OR DO YOU??? Freezing things close to expiring will let them last for a full freaking month extra. and vegetables go even longer. Plenty of time to use it when you need it (just don't forget to thaw) Be careful though: once you thawed it, you can't freeze it again.

Items are usually also WAY cheaper if you buy them in bulk. Chop them up and in the freezer they go! This one's also great if you don't always have the energy or drive to cook: cook up a large pot of whatever you like, put it in containers and freeze them. I always like doing so with pasta sauce and then cook the pasta fresh~ But it also works great with stews, curry and other types of sauces. stores like IKEA have containers that are just the right size for one meal.

For some of you, the next one may be a no-brainer, but.... My mom was really proud of how fast she was with doing the dishes. She was always like 'why get a dishwasher, I'm faster if I do it myself'. And I have lived up to that same idea up until half a year ago. My kitchen was always a mess, I didn't feel like cooking, inviting people over was embarrassing. I exhausted myself every time visitors would come and I had to fight that monster pile. Please, if you recognize these problems: invest in a dishwasher. Life became SO MUCH easier. My house is clean, my mind is more at ease, social contact increased cuz it's not as big a hassle to clean before guests show up. I really wish I wouldn't have wasted those 3 years fighting a monster that was this easy to tackle in the end...

2 easy cooking

Though it's also a bit of an investment: cooking becomes fucking easy with an airfryer. No oil is added, so it's a bunch healthier. you just put the temperature and timer and it's done. and a lot of things can just fry simultaneously. chuck in some meat and potato's at 400F (200C) for 20 minutes and all you'll have to worry about is adding some vegies with it. springrolls, pizza, potato's, meat. it all gets nice and crunchy too. (prepare vegies in a rice cooker for the same don't-have-to-keep-an-eye-on-it experience. you can cook them simultaneously with rice too!)

Something that became one of my fave dishes of the late is 'stir fried whatever'. it goes like this: Bake whatever meat you fancy, great with egg or tofu too. add whatever vegies (straight out of the freezer is fine). add stir fry sauce in whatever amount seems nice (little for coating, more if you want it to be saucy). make some carbs and you're fucking DONE! no measuring, no thinking what spices to use, it goes with anything and everything. and your local grocery has probably like 5 different flavors. (or at least, it does here. dunno if that's true for America...) like it creamy? add half a cup of soya milk. it takes like 10 minutes tops (not counting the cooking of rice/pasta/potato/bread)

3 think in money or think in space

With tricks like a good freezer, saving money with discount products becomes a whole lot easier. But there are also different discount products that can save you a lot of money. my mom always used to buy like.... packs of 4 toilet rolls. and if you calculate it, buying 3x4 rolls is so much more expensive than buying a 12 pack. But what you'll need for that is space. Try keeping account of a spot like that in your house. cupboard underneath the sink, the spot where they installed the boiler, top shelves you don't often use cuz it's high up, on top of the fridge, garage. I live in an apartment and have a small storage space for my bicycle. Perfect spot for non-consumables. (be careful to keep them out of reach for mice) think toilet paper, tissues, cat litter, soap, shampoo, toothpaste. they'll be good in 2 years too, and you'll still be needing them all the same. I once found this 6 pack of toothpaste for like 3,-! aint no one selling 1 tube for 0,50 when I buy it once I need it.

dunno if this is of any use to someone, but I hope this can help out anyone to safe some money, time or energy! Because it sure did for me.

[torihakaraublog]

Obey Me! Nightbringer "The Great Devildom Outdoors" Pop Quiz

!SPOILER WARNING FOR THE EVENT AND THE OM! ANIME!

My thoughts on Beel-centric 2023 event! Includes mention of the Obey Me! anime.

Finally a Beel event!! The theme of camping wasen't a bad option, but the timeline if connected to the anime at all is a bit wonky (will explain more later). If you haven't seen the anime my guess is it takes place sometime durring the original game timeline. Basically the plot is MC takes a long trip to the human world and the brothers are a mess.

Okay these options make the most sense; Lucifer is stated in the anime as being a caping expert of sorts (whole episode on this), Levi probably saw a camping anime and would want to go, Bel obviously is going to support his brother and Simeon + Luke like trying new things.

Now where things get funky. It's implied in this event this is everyone's (except Beel) first time camping and they know very little about this. In the anime Lucifer is an experienced camper and takes Beel, Mammon, and Asmo camping with him one day for their first camping experience. The trio wants to enjoy their first camping experience and try new things, but Lucifer is so overbearing they all end up leaving. So I think it's safe to say this pop quiz event does not take place in the Anime! timeline. Unless this event is what gets Lucifer into camping (started doing it solo) and he just kind of ignores the fact Beel got him into camping as he is 'better at it.'

Anime Lucifer is unhinged for real tho.

Moving on the group is split into two teams; cooking and food prep. I got to help with the tent! I appreciate it was a pop up one xD

Yes, yes! Solo trip with Beel! This is what I wanted!! Tho I'm not sure I agree with their definition of glamping? It seemed more like going to a rustic resort that offers activity and meal services. Where I live glamping is often referred to using a nice trailer instead of a tent to go camping.

These moment's here officer these are the moments that made my heart squeel. I dry him off and we are SHARING A BED.

All the food sounded really yummy! It was particularly preped and we assembled + cooked? This choice above was kinda weird tho? It's in response to Beel saying the ingredients look good enough to eat raw. I picked the bottom option cause a lot of the ingredients could be eaten raw (not the srimp).

Going to the lake with fireflies was so cool! Very beautiful :3 and Beel saw a shooting star.

I always try to never shame/bring down, Beel for being hungry as he has little control over it. I picked to have a pastry in my bag instead of candy because irl I often have some kind of, bread, muffins, crackers in my bag as back up.

picked the top option cause I just have trouble sleeping in general and often the location dosen't have any impact. Though my perfered sleeping spots are cars and nice hotel beds xD

Beel you can't say such a suggestive thing while we are sleeping away together >_<.

(This isn't the whole interaction- more a note to myself that I have more photos saved)

Aaa-a kiss?! As much as I was feeling the option in the moment I was playing I still went with the top one cause that's something I would be more likely ask for even if I wanted the kiss (*cries in lonely irl person, but not lonely MC*)

Please someone cuddle with me!!

The other root was camping on the lawn which was fun! Luke put our tent up all by himself! I was not allowed to eat burnt food xD It's not specified what we are eating here.

Overall I greatly enjoyed the event. But I do think this could have also been framed as a Lucifer event to match some existing lore (to be fair I have not completed the og game so maybe it makes more sense with that context) and Beel's event could have been one of the past events, specifically the fangol one.

Foods Mentioned

Lava Cheese Fondue (Made By Levi)

Clam Risotto (Made by Simeon + Lucifer)

Black Tapir (Glamping)

Bone-in Sausage (Glamping)

Garlic Fried Shrimp (Glamping)

Seasonal Vegetable Salad (Glamping)

Paella (Glamping)

Crème Brulee (Glamping)

[superfluouskeys]

2 and 4 for Melanie Cavill | 5 for Althea from known media “wip whenever parts 1, 2, 3, and 4” | 20 for persephonestraygods And hmmmm hMMMM 9 for Alastor from HH

oooohoohhohohoo these were much food for thought thank you definitely anonymous and mysterious and unknowable friend!!!!

MELANIE CAVILL

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

*LOUD WAILING* I just loooooooooove the way she is set up and portrayed in literally all of s1, the way she is consistently humanized despite how her actions might look (showing her in her lil MIT sweatshirt with her lil lunch box before the reveal that she's running the train; showing her getting sick after she tortures josie; her consistently being like i am an engineer i should be doing That not This).

I was just thinking, I think the main reason the daughter coming back plot rubs me the wrong way is because her having a daughter at all seems a bit incidental to her character; it only really matters bc it shows that she "chose the train" over her daughter. I just really dislike it when shows use 'but she loves children' as a way to 'humanize' female characters. The reconciliation arc feels like such a ham-fisted way to show another side of Melanie when they were doing that already in subtler and better ways.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

ONE THAT APPRECIATES HER!!!!!!! I'm having such a hard time taking her off the train in my mind LOL no one escapes the train. I think something else similarly futuristic/dystopian would also fit her though. And she just has SUCH antihero/reformed villain turned protag potential. Let her go from "I went about this the wrong way" to "I'm the only one who can fix this new disaster that happened after my fall from grace, let me make it right."

ALTHEA BLACKTHORNE FROM KNOWN MEDIA UNNAMED WIP (actually the wip does have a name but I do occasionally keep some things to myself)

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Okay I spent some time second-guessing my first thought but honestly no I stand by it, "Elastic Heart" by Sia.

PERSEPHONESTRAYGODS

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

Hmmmmmmmmm okay okay okay hear me out, Persephone really seems to like people who see past her tough exterior and call her on her bullshit, and of course she needs a drinking buddy. I think she wouldn't really mind someone who has a really different life experience from her or someone who can't fully understand everything she's been through. It's more important to her to be seen clearly in the present than to be understood completely, if that makes sense. Hear me out but. I think Persephone and Korra could be friends.

ALASTOR FROM UNIVERSALLY BELOVED HH

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

All right we've got some pros and cons here.

PRO: Hates infernal picture boxes. Would not blast tiktoks without headphones or try to get me to watch some show I would hate in the name of roommate bonding. CON: Might spontaneously cut the power or short-circuit something for reasons unknowable to me.

PRO: Seems perfectly happy to take care of simple home repairs. At worst it would cost me one (1) soul.

PRO: Loves electro-swing and drinking, zero downsides here.

CON: Eats exclusively raw, rotting animal carcasses, BUT hear me out. PRO: I would never have to wait to use the kitchen. Has immaculate table manners while eating raw, rotting animal carcasses. Very important.

CON: Has weird friends that might spontaneously show up and bring untold disaster to my doorstep, but that's pretty much always what it feels like when your roommate has friends over.

Result: Yes I think we could be roommates I think it would be fun at least for awhile and honestly would not be even close to the worst roommate situations I have had.

Character Ask Game!

[hughungrybear]

Me watching Dangerous Romance Ep.7:

1. I'm excited! Who's excited? We'll finally know the aftermath of the kiss. I mean, after Kanghan explicitly told Sailom that all he feels for him is guilt, how would he explain the kiss??? 😤😤😤

2. Waaaaait, hold up. Is grandma sick??? Also, Sailom is back in Kang's house eating dinner with the family but the two still seems a whole lot of awkward with each other. 😶

3. Oh, so Kang and Sailom didn't get to talk? Dammit, Guy and Auto. Also, that's no fair, Kang - telling Sailom you don't want to see him with anybody else but still have not retracted the part that all you feel is guilt and pity for him.

4. I almost forgot that they have connected bedrooms via a shared bathroom. Oooh, the possibilities lol 😅😅😅

5. Kang: "Give it to me straight". Me: "He can't. He is gay/bi." 😂😂😂 Yeah, I'll see myself out 😅😅😅

6. I laughed when Kang asked if Sailom wants to be his boyfriend. I mean, really? Really? Just the previous episode you were ready to punch Sailom for breaking Pimfah's heart and has also broke his heart in the process. No apologies? No backsies?? WTF. 😭😤

7. It's awfully quiet back there that if I'm the car driver, I would be suspicious 😂😂😂 Also, look at Kang's smile when Sailom opened the (bathroom) door for him.

8. Okay, Kang being completely honest about his feeling for Sailom is 😭😭😭😭 but his way of flirting is 😅😅😅😅😅 .

Guys, I died laughing. I already ascended to heaven (or descended to hell, am not really fussy about these things lol)

9. On the bright side, having Kang as a boyfriend means Sailom (and his friends) will never be hangry as he kept buying food/feeding Sailom tasty treats lol

10. Oooh, so Kang decided to start gaining Sailom's friends' trust by bringing them food? What are Guy and Auto, alley cats??? Lol.

11. Oh no! Grandma, be well 😭😭😭 Why were you lifting heavy objects? You are rich! Call someone to do it for you next time 😭😭😭

(Sidenote: My Grandma did something similar. She went ahead and used a ladder to change a lightbulb in her house but the ladder collapse under her weight and she hit her hip. After that, her hip deteriorated as she did not go to a doctor because she didn't want to 'waste' money. She was never able to regain her ability to walk and had to use a wheelchair until she died.)

12. Lightning striking just as Saifah swearing that he will never manipulate Kang's grandma to buy him things is peak comedy 😂😂😂 Also, yeah I don't trust Saifah. No offence but he hasn't done anything (in this series) that paints him as trustworthy lol

13. I forgot that Sailom's fave dish is grilled fish and veggies. But how did Kang know? Lol. See, told you Kang is treating Sailom's friends like pets 😂😂😂 Ngl though, I would have eaten the snacks and still not trust Kang to pull a prank or two lol

14. Wait, did Pimfah really asked Kang or is that an excuse? Also did they tell Pimfah about what is happening them or did they just let her figure things out? 😑

15. I would ignore the fact that Kang raided Sailom's drawers (without asking, mind) to get that shirt, but focus on his relentless cheesy flirting in a public transportation lol

16. Another sidenote: I cannot believe, not even for a second, that Kang's noodle is NOT spicy. For better or for worse, authentic Thai food is almost always spicy even without the chilis. Lol. Also, not related to the plot or story, if it's available in your local Asian grocery and don't mind spicy food, try the MAMA and MAMA OK instant noodles (esp. the salted egg flavour).

17. Tbf, I don't think it is just the spicy noodles. I doubt Kang has any experience shopping in a crowded public market. I mean, as a kid, my mum also used to drag me to our country's Chinatown market (because that's where all the cheap goods are) to shop and hated every minute of it because of the crowd, the heat, and the smell of wet goods exposed under the hot sun.

18. Auto: "We are not down to earth. We are just dirt poor". Harsh, but extremely accurate lol

Also Auto: We don't mind that (Kang spending money on them). Throw it all you want. We're all for it. Throw it this way. Screw dignity! Keep throwing! Don't hold back! 😂😂😂😂

19. Kang's road to romance is a bit rocky. It's a given that Auto and (more specifically) Guy will have a difficult time trusting Kang after the bullying incident in the first episodes. However, Kang's friends are also bonafide a**holes, even without Kang's prompting. 😅

20. Where is my Guy and Nava ship??? I swear if GMMTV does this like they did TiwPor in MSP (as if an afterthought), I WILL RIOT. 😤😤😤

21. Wait a freaking minute. These are high school students. I'm not saying I was a saint at that age, but I drunk beer in the privacy of my friend's backyard lol. Pretty sure underage drinking in a public place like a bar is illegal even in Asia.

22. It turns out, Auto is the worst kind of drunk lol. Also, I believe Chimon when he said Sailom cannot dance. You'll understand if you have seen an episode of the School Rangers 😂😂😂😂

23. Uhm, Miss, stop grinding. He is gay. Lol.

24. I mean, alcohol is not the best relationship starter, but if it will set my GuyNava ship to sail, I will take it (as long as everything is consentual, ofc) 😅😅😅

25. See, it is illegal. But Auto, learn to run faster, gawd dammit. Also, what would happen to Kang? Will his father scold him? I highly doubt it since they have been painting the man as "doting" to the point that Kang cannot disappoint him because he does not expect anything great or good from Kang. However, this might ruin his political dreams, so we'll see.

26. The dad finally getting angry with Kang only because it can potentially ruin his election run is all kinds of messed up. 😑

27. At this point, Sailom has displaced Kang as the favourite grandson lol

28. Ugh, Saifah. What are you planning??? Don't ruin this for Sailom 😭😭😭😭

29. Oof. The cheerleader outfits are cute. They look like Sailormoon's transformation outfit. 😍

30. Why are you flirting in front of everyone's salad, Kang? 😅😅😅 You have a game to play. Focus. 😆😆😆

31. I know people have been pointing out the similarities between this series and BBS. I guess the true test of acceptance is when your bff learns to play well together with your (not-yet) bf in a football match 😂😂😂

32. Kang being anxious that Guy (and Auto) will never like him for missing that goal is 😔😔😔 Also, I commend Guy (and Auto) for being so sharp, it hurts lol. Unlike some "friends" (looking at you, Wai) 🙄

Officially boyfriends!!! Will Kang ramp up his cheesy flirting? Also, Saifah being on Ms Ging's medical team CANNOT be a good thing. The man is not above stealing from patients. I can smell trouble.