#But I will! I'll get there some day!!
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youtuber, covering a horror ARG: this game was developed by just one indie developer-
Me ever since I've been trying to make a game: Ohh my god,,, this was made by,,,, just one personnn,, , ,
#wow actually me talking#Like that shit is just so INSPIRING#like yeah girl!!! You fucking CRUSHED that!!!! I do not know how you pull that#But I will! I'll get there some day!!#Literally doing a course where I'll be taught the ins and outs of model creation#And lemme tell you#The second I learn how to rig a model it's over for you!!#(and program as well but. I have a friend who did coding in college so I'll ask him about it if I really don't get it maybe)
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I read too many stories of "women" throughout history who lived as men and wore men's clothing getting beaten and arrested for it, sensationalized in the press as "man-woman," painted as perverts and monsters, put in literal freakshows, and forcibly institutionalized to sit by quietly while non-transmascs loudly and confidently claim that "female masculinity" has never been targeted as much as "male femininity" has. Read some trans and queer history that isn't only about gay men and trans women before you open your mouths about butches and transmascs, or better yet just listen to us about our history and experiences in the first place.
#not to mention the modern day lived experiences of trans men and mascs we are always trying to tell you about#I get laughed at and called a dyke for the way I present but yeah sure non transmasc tumblr user you definitely know my life better than me#I've compiled a reading/re-reading list for myself using material from my trans studies classes & over the next couple weeks#I'll be posting some important bits from them that illustrate some of these situations I've learned about once I have more details#trying not to engage with transandrophobes online but when this rhetoric is coming directly from trans academics it's like :/#transandrophobia#mine
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Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.
Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).
Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.
Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.
Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).
AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.
But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s
At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.
#mlp#yeah i wrote this last night during insomnia.#yeah i know an embarrassing amount of crap about this kids show#but whatever it's my hyperfixation i'll store as much useless information as i want!!!#i'm gay and neurodivergent i have an excuse#in case you needed more proof that aj's my favorite character#personal#delete later#unless you like this analysis stuff#i get why they didn't reveal aj's parent's death until way later and why they didn't do much with it but i wish they did#cuz narratively there could've been so much material with aj's grief. like. i feel like we gloss over the fact that she lost her#mother and father as a teenager#i tried keeping my personal hcs out of this to keep it unbiased#but i'll put some in the tags#involving rarijack –– i think aj can be (but not always) very self-conscious about her relationship with rarity#anxieties that she's not the right fit or that rarity will move away and leave her some day or that another woman will take her attention#(like in rollercoaster of friendship?? nudge nudge??). basic seperation anxiety stuff#long post#regarding applebloom whenever i think about her and her parents i think about that scene in steven universe where steven looks up at#a portrait of his mother and openly wonders what kind of sack lunches she would've made for him. that episode still fucks me up
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pals drinking together (hand practice that got out of control)
#team fortress 2#tf2 fanart#tf2#tf2 medic#tf2 heavy#heavymedic#im british ok drawing people drinking is part of my hierarchy of needs#i had to draw so many casual outfits so it didn't look like a singular pubcrawl#these are all unrelated doodles i collected together but#i wanted it to sort of look like heavy is warming up to medic over time and medic is learning to shut up and listen#trying to expand my mental library of hands and holding glasses by drawing them a lot sigh#some of these hands are terrible so back to the drawing board (har har) until i get them right#one day i'll draw these characters consistantly
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looking for someone on Tatooine
#commander cody#coday#cody day 2224#codywan#tatooine husbands#looking for obi-wan obviously DUH#ARE YOU GUYS READY FOR CODAY????#I've overdone myself and drawn THREE pieces for today like what????#I did not think I'd get them all done but somehow I did#I'll post them all during this day with little gaps in between#cody my beloved#I gotta say#I've never drawn as good looking rocks as I did here#the ones Cody's sitting on like#THEY AREN'T EVEN THAT GOOD but I suck at any type of background shit so I'm so happy they look decent hahaha#I also live for scavenger/ rebel/ hobo -outfit Cody#and also that he still keeps some parts of his armor#just to be able to kick ppl and droids if the need arises ofc#I love Cody so much I'm so ready for today#star wars#my arts
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𝐊𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐮 𝐑𝐞𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐑𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐇𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐭𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐂𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐍𝐉 - 𝟏𝟎/𝟎𝟖/𝟐𝟑
#*tucks hair behind his ear*#Keanu Reeves#*#kreevesedit#flashing gif#keanuedit#yeah my boyfriend's in a band#THE DAY AFTER I MET AND SAW HIM#keke babe do you not get dizzy doing all that head bobbing#h a n d s#MAJESTIC#hi i love an old man#a hair tie claw clip barrette butterfly clip one of those big ones that looks like a flower#*runs hand down his forearm like it's a staircase bannister*#......it's been a long week......i apologize#people who don't like gray hair are weak#i will give you 43 cents and a cookie if you let me play with your hair#...that was already a tag#but the offer still stands#i'll even throw in a $2 bill i work at a bank i can get some#are backpacks you wear in the front a thing? because i would like to be one#v e i n s#can't believe he's really been here and hot my whole life#that is a long™ torso#more room to wrap around#hands so big they could hold two ankles at once#omg who said that
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toilet quartet!!!
#I'll get back to jrwi fanart one of these days#but first I need to let some demons out#tbhk#jshk#toilet bound hanako kun#jibaku shounen hanako kun#mitsukou#hananene#catt art#I drew their faces really inconsistently :(
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The solver is gone (?) They put Bizcuit in a normal worker body. They really didn’t expect him to grow sharp teeth or a tail. He doesn't need to drink oil to live but that won't stop him from trying. (cw: vomiting)
(I actually drew most of this before episode 7, but I felt like cleaning it up a bit and posting it now)
#I am am working on requests I just really wanted to finish this all of a sudden#I made this and now you get to look at it#<- new tag for things i'm slightly embarrassed to post#nuzi fankid#Murder Drones#uzi doorman#serial designation n#nuzi#I'm gonna make a joke character haha *makes a whole serious thing*#it's fun#elio bizcuit doorman#guess he got a tag now#I actually made a vizzy kid too maybe i'll post her#some day#repost fixed some stuff
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Happy 3/7day 🥰~! 'One day we'll look back on all these memories and smile about it'
Process + detail:
#my art#sasunaru#sns#sasuke x naruto#sasunaru day#sasunaru fanart#I'll post this for now since it's a special day~#but I'm seriously going to think about this whole art posting...#regarding ai and all#I mentioned it briefly before#but ai literally ruined the 2 biggest projects I was asked to work on#and another that I was going to work on#I had another opportunity here where I was going to get paid#for drawings somewhat regularly#but instead the offer changed to paying for my art#only to be trained for ai#so that didn't happen either#I shall not complain too much#I'm just amazed at the careless way some talk about it#because IT IS ruining lives and careers#ai IS already very advanced#:((
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Ma’am, you are deviously incredible 🔥 We’re begging for an exploration of him saying “I love you” while fucking her like he doesn’t 🥹
My brain keeps picking up the storyline a few splendidly torturous hours in when her body’s completely spent & quivering & she’s a blubbering mess & that’s when he picks her up & takes his sweet time positioning her so she can limply yet eagerly watch their reflection has he finally gives her… exactly what her twitching body’s been craving. 🥵
I'm so glad you all enjoyed the thought of this as much as I did because I've been dying to expand on it 😵💫 (Part 1 here)
I like to imagine by that stage, he's absolutely desperate too though. He's got to feel your sweet little pussy clench and flutter around him, contracting so tight every time you cum that he swears it's going to be the end of him.
He's been too hard for too long, buried inside your body and he swears he's never felt you this wet or this hot before. It's been fucking luxurious, forcing you to cum against his fingers, feeling how your body's natural reaction is to coax him to drain his balls into you but that alone isn’t enough. He needs more than that.
He wouldn't admit it to you but he can't take any more. His balls feel like they're fizzing; overfull and beyond ready to flood your waiting, overstimulated body.
He arranges you gently, laying you on your front because he doesn't trust your trembling arms to support you. "That's it, good girl." He coos, hearing you whimper and sob pathetically because he needs to slip out of you to slide a pillow under your hips.
"You've made such a mess." He groans, taking a second to appreciate the delicious, inviting, slick little cunt he's about to indulge in. "You're dripping, sweetheart. God, I just know there's no way I'm going to be able to pull out."
His huge hands are gripping your hips and with one sharp, brutal thrust, he's back inside you and you both sob pathetically at the feeling of your bodies being joined again. This is exactly what you've needed but you don't have the words to tell him that. All you can do is whine and will your body not to cum again so soon.
"I meant. What I said earlier." He punctuates his sentence with soft groans, drawing back until he almost slips out of you before pounding back in.
He leans forward, tilting your chin up, making sure you can see the way he's fucking you in the mirror at the end of the bed.
"I love you. And I don't want you to forget that." He sounds sincere, one hand trailing up from the small of your back to right between your shoulder blades and then back down again. It feels intimate and tender but all that is forgotten by the very next thrust.
"I love you. But for now, you're just a mindless. Little. Drooling. Breedable. Cunt for me." He slows his thrusts down, determined not to cum so soon but it's going to be difficult to last until he gets the first couple of loads out of the way.
"Baby..." You whimper, feeling the tip of his cock nudge against your sweet spot, making you shake from overstimulation.
"I know sweetheart, I know. It's too much. But you're being so good for me. You're so perfect. How have no idea how you feel. So wet and warm and I can feel you fluttering around my cock. It's like you're trying to squeeze every last drop of cum out of me. Is that what you want? Because angel, I'll keep this delicious cunt stuffed full of load after load until I have nothing left to give you."
His thrusts are punishingly fast, thumping against your raised ass, half chasing his orgasm, half holding it back.
"And when I do, I'll remind you just how much I love you. And the baby I'm going to give you tonight."
With that thought, he can't stop himself from cumming, his dick twitching inside you as he shoots thick ropes of his seed right against your cervix. You're so cock-drunk you can only rut yourself millimetres back and forth but that's all you need to send yourself spiralling into another orgasm that leaves you trembling and sobbing.
"Fuck, you want that as much as I do, don't you?" He kisses the back of your neck, breathing you in while letting the euphoric rush subside. He notices he hasn't softened in the slightest despite such an intense orgasm but he knows he needs to be gentle with you for a moment before he can get any rougher.
#asks answered <3#becca writes spice#anon#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x reader smut#needy!bucky#please no one think this is what a healthy relationship is like#but this really really does something for me#the level of nasty in me for someone who'd say stuff like that is truly endless#I'll be the ✨freakiest ✨wife for someone some day#but for now I've fallen in love with the eviee sendal Doc Martens#and I can't do that#because I know if I get them I'm going to feel way too hot#and that would be dangerous for everyone tbh
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i'm about to pass out at my desk, but have this stupid ass doodle i did before i go sleep.
#will i ever post drawings at a normal time of day? probably not#i keep giggling at this i draw the stupidest shit#i'm sorry for the tonal whiplash between this & my first kieran drawing akjsfjkdf#also i need to draw proper refs for mjverse florian & juliana#i'm growing very fond of them i love my silly field research obsessed son that keeps on having shit happen to him >>>#& his big sister that could and will kick your ass#i have one more goofy ass doodle i need to get out of my system w/ these 2 but then i'll draw some actual stuff for them#(expect some future au content soon 😏)#pokemon#pokemon scarlet and violet#pkmn scarvio#trainer florian#pokemon florian#rival kieran#pokemon kieran#ogerpon#tealmaskshipping#ship : florian & kieran#chara : florian russel cavallari#chara : kieran hinoki#mjverse#🎨 : mj draws#sv dlc spoilers#scarvio spoilers
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#worufu draws#sidlink#should just draw basically identical smoochin' pics all day long i mean that's what i like doing#beats not drawing at all#can't this just be my niche forever#let other people make ambitious fine art or whatever i'll just be here doodlin some noses getting smushed against cheeks
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#gravity falls#Alex Hirsch#bill cipher#so Alex is putting on a gravity falls cosplay contest for nycc#Alex when I get you....#Alex if I didn't have 12 days to prepare for this....#and like 7 other projects ongoing at once....#and entire marionette to carve before the con.....#and also didn't have a job to work.......#AGHHHHHHHH#idk what I'd even be#go to party city and buy their entire stock of everything yellow probably#put it all in a pile stab it with scissors and douse it in hot glue then roll in it until it forms a dress#then glue some fake eyeballs wherever possible#bill cipher deconstructed#but nay I shant#i can't. I mustnt.#I'm already dressing in a closet greed cosplay bc that's easy and I'll look cute as hell in it#agh#agh agh aghhhhhhh#forcibly telling myself no you are on such a time crunch rn you can't waste a day of wood carving to make a cosplay#FORCIBLY TELLING MYSELF THIS. AGGRESSIVELY.
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somewhere deep in the forest...
#trying to get some use out of this 30$ game pack i never use#i'll favorite the original lot on the gallery so that you guys can find it on my profile (ceru-bean)#ts4 gameplay#the sims 4#simblr#s4mm#s#ts4#aslo! once im done making the camp tshirts and hats and everything im gonna make the camp counselors!!!! im so excited ^-^#i was thinking of having 4 young adults and 3-4 teens as counselors and then about 12 kids for the camp? idk we'll see#also need the tool mod so i can add activities around the camp off lot like archery or smtg#we'll see how long this fixation lasts and if it'll ever see the light of day but at least i hope it inspires someone else!
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Wow. That could not have turned out worse.
Part 23 || First || Previous || Next
--Full Series--
This comic will be on Holiday Hiatus this December and January! While on a cliffhanger? What a scam! >:/
#Chara finally realizes something is wrong....very wrong#And you get to see little Chara for all of 2 drawings. wow. You guys are so spoiled uwu#Asriel and Chara bbfs#finally out of that darn tootin' Darkworld! WE'VE BEEN THERE FOR 2 YEARS!!!#LORE TIME LORE TIME. I know Chara is very vague about it but player-human relationships are very personal.#it can be hard to talk about them if you've been possessed yourself. especially with some stigmas around it#chara just wanted a glass of water. why you gotta do this to em#I am so so so happy to get here#the full excitement has faded since I first thought up this scene but It's still one hell of an accomplishment#YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA how many times I reworked this and how many rough drafts I've thrown out the window because of it.#tbh. I may post the 10+ rough pages that will never see the light of day#Im glad I didnt go through with that scrapped plot bc It was too many unneeded pages. I've learned to start condensing in a better way#I am also planning on showing off my Patreon soon :) so I'll be posting complete scrapped story lines over there#deltarune chara timeline#deltarune#utdr#deltarune chara timeline comic#art#my art#bread#chara#asriel#saloon darkworld#darkworld#deltarune au#college chara#college asriel
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💖 EVEN MORE DAY 4 SNEAK PEEKS! 💖
#>:3 /hehe /nefarious#+ One extra screenshot to make it look neater ghsjgds#14 Days With You#14DWY#yandere#yandere visual novel#yandere vn#yandere OC#💖 — 14 days with queue.#🖤 — spoilers.#🖤 — updates.#🖤 — shut up sai.#ETA: 14DWY Discord I have not forgotten about you <3 Y'all will get a unique update 🔜 + access to Day 4 before the public (as always)#I appreciate everyone's patience though!! Once my Uni break rolls around I'll be sure to post more consistently and be more active online!#Because right now it's been kinda hard to find the time to go through all my socials AND indulge in my own personal interests/hobbies T_T#Sometimes I wanna Dawn some Trails...... But Ren yearns to be acknowledged...... /silly#Anyways!! I'll stop yappin and complaining now lmao ^^; I hope y'all enjoy these lil updates!!#14DWY Discord... I sill see you all soon....... >:3c /j threat
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