#But I think Riley could use some parental support!

[shitpostingkats]

*how I imagine it went down*

Someone, bursting into Crow's office: Crow! There's some weird kids on the street! And it looks like they don't have any parents!

Crow: Get my motorcycle.

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

I don't know if you ever received this ask or had this idea before but here goes nothing Since Ghost already met Jade's family, what if she meets his? ....angst material. Sorry not sorry.

Oh my God... Anon... You sparked something in me, and I cannot go to sleep now without posting this. Thank you so much for the idea.

(I think I'm gonna make a full on comic out of this, and I will make an art at some point for this fic, but let's use this lovely GIF of Ghost first)

She's The One

Jade meets Ghost's family.

Pairing : Simon “Ghost” Riley x Charlotte “Jade” Le Jardin (OC) Word Count : ~ 1.8k words Warning : Medium to heavy angst and mentions of death, but ends with a full on fluff because you know me mate I want Ghost to be happy ok.

Title and story inspired by the song 'She's The One' by Robbie Williams

"...How's your family, Simon?" 

Jade asked Ghost. They had been having a small outing, which included watching the cinema together and going around the streetside shops to find new wardrobes for Ghost to wear. He initially thought that it was unnecessary, but as Jade insisted, he went anyway – as long as he could spend his off-duty time with her.  

He'd met her parents, and though he was apprehensive about it at first, they turned out to be pleasant and strong people. It was such an unfamiliar feeling for him, to have a family to come home to, a supportive family and kind and can take care of their own. He's foreign to that concept.

Ghost just stayed silent to her question, his expression which was usually unreadable turned sorrowful, his eyes gazing down at the pavements they walked. She thought she should change the subject before Ghost muttered,

"You want to see them now?" 

Jade opened her eyes wide in surprise, not expecting him to say anything about meeting his family this fast, and the way he said 'now'...

The woman knew Ghost wouldn't ask her that question if he was adamant as he was a straightforward person. And so, she answered, "Of course, if you don't mind it." He then proceeded to enter his car that was parked not far from where they just watched a movie in a cinema, not forgetting to open the passenger door for Jade beforehand. 

They drove for a full 30 minutes of silence, save for the sound soft songs on the radio. As Ghost drove, Jade looked out the window and understood that they were going to a familiar place that she had passed by a few times in her life. He drove to the nearest available parking area, parking his car flawlessly before stopping the car engine, leaving the both of them in complete silence. 

Jade felt the atmosphere around him grow heavy, his hands still on the steering wheel as if he was still pondering whether or not he wanted to get out of the car. He let out a soft sigh, took his keys and got out of the car. Jade got out of her own and looked at the surrounding area.

Cemetery.

The sun had disappeared behind the heavy grey clouds that constantly covered the England skies. Tiny drops of water had touched her cheek, in such a way it reflected Ghost's inner thoughts right now. 

The man looked at her, "Over here." He walked with Jade following right behind him. After about 10 minutes of walking and treading through the tall grasses, Ghost stopped in front of a group of gravestones, four of them, which were placed more tightly together than the other. The grasses were tidily short, a sign that the keepers attended to these graves properly.

Jade then looked down, reading the engravings on the stones, and her heart shattered to pieces.

"Susan Riley, November 17th, 1965 - December 24th, 2017"

"Thomas Riley, July 21st, 1990 - December 24th, 2017"

"Elizabeth Riley, May 8th, 1991 - December 24th, 2017"

"Joseph Riley, March 19th, 2013 - December 24th, 2017"

It was his mother's birthday. 

She looked up to find Ghost's eyes gazing down at the names as well, noticing that the ground he was standing on was right at the front of his mother's grave. No tears in sight, only sadness, and as an MI6 agent of two decades, she could deduce an expression of regret. Jade didn't need to wonder why, as the dates of their deaths were all the same - the reason he hid his identity, lived as no one, avoided any relationship with anyone, and the reason why he was adamant about meeting her parents – His past came to haunt, and it's target was not him. 

Jade couldn't say anything. What could she say? That she's sorry this happened? She knew Ghost hated that phrase the most, of someone pitying him, that they wished things could be different. But what use is it to wish? It happened. His entire family died because something happened during one of his missions, and his family paid the price for it.

As if on cue, she heard a small sniff from him the same second the raindrops started to grow more frequent, falling harder, creating white noises and wet spots on their clothes. Being the Londoner she was, knowing that sunny days were never really sunny, Jade fished out her floral purple umbrella, holding it above Ghost's head beside her, making sure to cover his broad shoulders fully as her left shoulder grew wet. 

She saw his face, and it was enough reason to stay silent and let him grieve. She didn't know if this was the first time he'd visited their graves after years or if he always come here at some time every year, but no matter which one the answer was, if she could see one thing, it was that his tears never seemed to run out, even after years.

Jade let him cry, the sound of his sobs completely drowned by the white noises of the heavy rain. 

She knew that he wasn't a big fan of any physical touch, nonetheless, she lifted her other hand softly and rubbed at his back, going up and down in an attempt to soothe his sorrow. And after a minute of him not flinching away from her touch, Jade mustered up her will to slowly encircle her arm around his own on his side, their sides touching as she rubbed his bicep, and going even further as she leaned her head to touch his shoulder. 

Ghost's shoulder still shook for a few minutes as he cried his heart out, Jade kept doing what she did as he let his sorrow out. 

Soon after, another surprise hit her when she heard and saw that the rain started to slow down, albeit still going down on both of them. Her other arm started to grow sore after moments of holding the umbrella high to accommodate his height, yet what alleviated the pain was the fact that she felt a small weight on her head, realizing that Ghost had eased his cries, now only soft sniffs, and that he leaned his head on top of hers as well.

He still stayed silent, not a word spoken ever since they arrived, but she knew that this was a good sign that he knew that she would be there for him, even when he was vulnerable.

"Happy birthday, Mrs. Riley." 

Jade muttered softly, the man beside her still looking down on his mother's grave even though he was slightly dazed at her words. 

"This is our first meeting, but I can tell that you were a kind person, and an even more amazing mother and grandmother."

He then glanced at Jade as she continued, "Your son is a very skilled and intelligent man, traits which I assume he got from you. He's confident, a great leader-- oh! And he's handsome as well, so that's a plus." 

That prompted a scoff out of his mouth. Nevertheless, she went on. "He's not much of a social person. He's a little bit intense and stiff - We can work on that. He shot my hand once! I have the scar to prove it. His choices of words are sometimes foul, though, again, we could always work on that." Jade joked lightheartedly, seeing him softly smile above her.

"But if there's one thing about him that I love, is that he's a strong man with a warm heart, and I don't have to assume to know that he got it from you." Jade continued. "Your son is the strongest man I know, and I will stop at nothing to protect him and make him happy."

Ghost looked down at her, astounded at her words. "Thank you for bringing him into this world. Happy birthday, Mrs. Riley." 

As she finished her message, Jade looked up with a soft smile, "I'll be sure to bring some flowers the next time we visit, and every year after that." 

She thought he was going to say something, until the arm that was intertwined with hers moved, though nervously, gliding across her back and found its home on Jade's shoulder, before lightly pressing and pulling her towards him. Jade blushed, not only at the warmth of his body but also at the fact that he initiated the touch. 

"Thank you, Lottie." He muttered in his deep voice, "So much." 

"Anytime, Love." 

After about 15 minutes of standing in front of the graves, the rain had stopped, and the sun showed up to light the rest of the day as the sky turned orange. Jade had stored the wet umbrella back in its container and hung it on her wrist before she walked back to the car per his request. Jade figured he wanted some alone time with his family, and so she obliged.

"How's she, Mum? She's a beautiful bird, isn't she?" 

Ghost finally spoke, his hands tucked inside his pockets. He then glanced at his brother's grave, smirking. "What about you, Tommy? You think she's the one?" He asked no one, not expecting any answer anyway, yet he just wanted to let it out.

"I thought I'm gonna bite the dust on some fucking rathole somewhere, and that was what I wished at some point, but..." Ghost sighed, shifting his weight on his hip, "I kind of want to die an old man, after living my life to the fullest with her-- Fuck, I can't believe I'm saying this." Ghost chuckled at his own words, not expecting it to be this heartfelt. "I'm arse over tit for her. Yeah, you're gonna laugh at me for this Tommy, but at least I didn't laugh when you said the same thing about Beth." 

"And Mum, knowing you, I think you'd like her. She's a bit like you, in a way." Ghost confessed, still eyeing her name on her gravestone, "She cares too much. In a good way, and I find it endearing." He suddenly recalled the memories he had with Jade, from the first moment they met to this moment, replaying them over and over and being surprised about how much she reminded him of his mother. 

"I want to protect her with all my life. I love her, Mum."

And with that, a burden on his shoulders felt like no more. He'd never said those words to anyone, and he might be insane to be in love with someone considering how he'd lived his life, but he'd made a promise to protect her, and if he'd be a fool, then a fool he would become.

"Anyway, she's waiting back there, and I'm hungry. So I'm going to leave you now." Ghost then stood up straight, his hands still in his pockets. He glanced at every single one of the gravestones, before looking at his mother's.

"Happy birthday, Mum." 

-----

(All of the Riley's birthdays are entirely made-up. Their date of death was also made up, but I remembered there were something with Christmas, so I'll just place December 24th to make my heart hurt more) ಥ_ಥ

Anyway, thank you for reading, and hope you love this! (❁´◡`❁)

[erinfern0]

no words were needed.

simon "ghost" riley x gn!reader

— gender-neutral nicknames, gender-neutral anatomy, only pronouns used are you, etc.

summary: you and simon were friends as long as you remember. maybe that was the reason why the two of you were so blind to the feeling hidden so deeply inside.

warnings: hurt/angst to comfort and fluff. cocky teasing, mention of abuse, swearing, smoking, terrible date, insecurities, self-doubt, jealousy, protective simon.

a/n: based on this lovely request, the only thing I decided to change is that i made the reader gender-neutral, not including any specific pronouns, just a little preference of mine.

You and Simon were always there for each other, since the day you two met. Not only because the two of you were neighbors — living just a couple of houses away from each other, but also because your parents were friends. Both of your fathers served in the military, and mothers always found time to chat and see each other when their husbands were away.

You always adored the tiny gentleman in him, he was like a brother to you, always finding ways to comfort you and help whenever you needed it. And you were there for him too, watching him exorcise or patching up all the little scruffs and wounds he had. You spent hours upon hours in your room just so he could escape from the rough household he had to grow up in.

Your house became his home, and he always felt like a brother to you, protecting you from possible dangers and people you'd rather not deal with. That was until high school, when you realized he's not the cute little boy he used to be. He turned a little colder, focusing on his grades and physique to appeal to his father's wishes.

Watching him lose himself broke your heart, especially after you realized you were catching feelings for him. You hid it well, trying not to get too close to him to not add burdens to his already high pile of them. You brought peace to his life that you didn't want to ruin.

No words were needed between the two of you to know exactly what you were thinking, well, most of the time. You always joked that you shared some braincells as you had the same type of humor and shared some interests.

He was slightly older than you, just a couple of months apart, and as soon as he turned 18, he started applying for the military. He worked his ass off, and you just supported him, reminding him how much he deserves to get in and how well he'll do as a soldier.

And you, too, had to work hard, studying for your exams. Ever since you turned 18 too, you felt the pressure of being an actual adult, having to apply for colleges and part-time jobs to not feel like a parasite to your parents.

Now, you were sitting in your room by your desk, spreading notes all over it and highlighting the most important parts when you heard footsteps coming upstairs. Not anyone from your family members. They belonged to Simon. Your heart rushed for a split second before he entered your room, hood covering most of his head and face.

“Learn to knock, Riley.” you turned towards him and smiled lightly. “I could have been naked, you know?”

“Wouldn't complain.” he chuckled as he walked to your desk and wrapped his arms around you from behind. Simon earned himself a light smack to his forearm for his comment. His head fell on your shoulder, watching you write over one of the pages. “Still studyin'?”

You groaned in frustration, head falling back against his body as he just laughed and ruffled your hair. Then, he just patted your shoulders and pulled away from the hug to sit on your parapet.

Closing your textbook and spinning around in your chair, you watched him lean against the wall and grab a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. “So, um… How was your date?”

His question caught you off guard, stopping you in your movements and just staring at the ceiling, thinking about the answer. Telling him the whole truth might be hurtful, not only for him and you but also to him and you'd never risk that.

Well, the only reason you even agreed to go was because he was slightly similar to Simon, a tall blonde gym rat who likes books and video games. You were naive thinking that he'll ever replace Simon. By the end of the date, you decided to tell him the truth, that you already had feelings for another man, and you are sorry for possibly leading him.

He turned out to be less sweet than you believed him to be, immediately getting mad at you for, as he phrased it: 'wasting his time'. This made you think so hard, how could you be anyone's type if the only person you truly want is your best friend?

“It was fine until it wasn't.” you claimed, immediately regretting your words as soon as you looked at Simon.

The hood was gone, leaving you to see the expression on his face. The frown of his brows and that spark in his eye made a chill run down your spine. Concern? Worry? Anger? You couldn't tell, but it wasn't anything nice.

“What did that prick do, huh?” he asked and looked at you while blowing out some smoke towards the opened window. That's when the light hit his face, showing you the bruise forming on his cheekbone.

“Again?” you whispered breathlessly, getting up from your seat to appear in front of him seconds later. Your fingers caught his chin, turning his face so you could see it better.

“Don't switch the topic on me.” he groaned with annoyance, gently wrapping his fingers around your wrist to pull your hand away from him. Seeing your face so upset, analyzing every little scratch on his face, especially the purple mark splashed on his side, he just sighed, shaking his head.

“Answer for an answer?” you asked, recalling a little rule the two of you had since your early childhood. His tongue brushed over his teeth as his mouth was closed, just accepting his fate.

“I asked first.” he barked, forcing a smirk on his chopped lips. His legs part, inviting you a little closer, and allowing you to wrap your arms around his torso. One of Simon's arms rested on your shoulder while the other held his cigarette away from you. “Plus, you already know the answer to your question so...”

“It wasn't that bad, it's just… We weren't a match, that's it.” you started, watching him raise his eyebrow in disbelief, knowing you too well to just believe it was the only reason. “God, you're annoying.” you huff and roll your eyes.

“Proud of it, too.” he shrugged his shoulders, leaning against the window to watch you squirm and collect your thoughts. That's what you thought he was doing, but actually, Simon's eyes were just wandering over your face to admire you, even if for just a couple of seconds.

Every little detail of your face was mapped in his head, knowing every curve and blemish, every beauty mark or scar that you had. He adored every part of you, especially your eyes that looked so lost in thought, so easy for him to get away with his actions.

“He was nice, we went for a walk in the park nearby. Then I just realized he… Wasn't exactly the person I was looking for, and I told him that.“ you met his gaze, dark browns hazed with nicotine, eyelids heavier than usual. His pupils were blown out, twitching as he looked into your own eyes. “I think I wasn't too gentle with it, he got so upset.”

Your gasp made his body stiffen in alert, the hand that rested on your shoulder gently squeezing it to encourage you to speak. His expression was puzzled, as if he was shifting between different emotions, analyzing the way your eyes fluttered. Of course, he didn't miss the water collecting in the corners of your eyes.

“Did he hurt you?” he asked, his voice low and quieter than before, as if you were a deer caught in the headlights. A dainty, sweet little fawn that he wished he could take care of better. His expression softened, the clench in his jaw relaxing under your touch,

“Not upset like that.” you assured, pulling away to rest your hands on his sides, gripping the material of his hoodie. The material is soft and smells so comfortable. The mix of his cologne and cigarettes, despite how much you hated him smoking, the scent always warmed your heart.

“He said something, didn't he?” he asked, teeth clenching as you nodded your head. “Take your time.” as he soothed your hair, the cigarette was thrown into the ashtray you got for him. His now free hand reached to your forearm, drawing calming shapes on your skin, causing goosebumps.

“Well, he just said that I'm wasting his time, how much he regretted seeing me that day because I turned out to be an 'indecisive little baby'. He…” you let out a shaky breath, trying so hard not to show him how much the guy's words hurt you. “He said I was unattractive and boring anyway. He just left me there.”

“Why didn't you call?” he asked, his jaw clenching again, and you felt the muscles of his back tensing under your fingertips. He shifted uncontrollably, trying to stay calm for you. “He'd have to look for his teeth in the fuckin' ground.”

You shook your head, trying to push away the image of Simon covered in the guy's blood, panting heavily with anger. Knowing how much he cared made you feel even worse for telling him all of this.

Simon's mind was somewhere else. Yes, of course, he'd beat the living shit out of your awful date, but what mattered more, the most, was you.

“You told me not to go, and I didn't listen.” you reminded him, biting your inner cheek to keep your composure. “You were right about him from the start, I just… Didn't want to bother you.”

“You'd never bother me, doll.” he assured, leaning closer to you. His face was mere inches away from yours, eyes scanning from your brows to your lips, stopping there for a second before he got right back to your eyes. “All he said was pure bullshit, I hope you know that.”

Your lack of response, and the nervous swallow you did, made his heart sink in realization. Of course, you'd listen to the man who was so direct rather than your friend who admired you in silence. You couldn't see yourself from his perspective.

You couldn't see how much he looked up to you, your soft and kind nature, how much he adored your voice when you rambled about school, friends, and your hobbies. Likewise, you didn't see your body like he did, as pure perfection. Furthermore, you didn't deserve to hear so many lies from such an insecure little fucker who got upset he wouldn't fuck you, as Simon thought.

The room was awfully quiet, as you closed your eyes to stop yourself from crying. He could see it, and it made him even more mad, not at you. At himself. How could he be so blind?

Now, sitting so close to you, thinking over all the ways he could show you how wrong the guy was, it hit him. He felt it before, the way his heart sped up thinking about you. How you were the first thing he thought in the morning after he woke up and the last thing before he went to bed. You were always on his mind, a fever dream of your touch, words, and smile wandering every time he needed comfort.

That's so obvious. He was stupid to believe the reason he was so mad when you mentioned your date was just because he had a bad feeling about him. He just wanted it to be him. All those years, he was just so blind.

Simon loved you like a madman, worshipping the ground you walk on and feeling lucky he could breathe the same air as you. He craved your comforting touch, you were the reason he liked to be touched in the first place, always pulling away from hugs too soon before he met you.

He swallowed harshly, shifting in his seat again, pulling you closer as he cupped your face. His thumbs caressed your cheeks, moving up to wipe a couple of tears that ran down your face.

"Look at me, please." his voice cracked, eyelids fluttering as his mouth felt incredibly dry. Licking his lips, he smiled softly as he saw you slowly open your eyes, looking at him with such a questionable mix of emotions. "You deserve way better than that dumb fuck." he spat out, holding back from saying 'I'd treat you better.'

"He was right, Si. I agreed to go even if I knew I didn't want any of it, I didn't want him." you whispered shakily, your hands resting atop his, Despite your state, you melted under his touch, hoping it'd last forever.

"Even if you knew that, he should be lucky you gave him a chance." his comment made the two of you chuckle softly, catching each other's gaze. You felt lost in his eyes, the dreamy brown making your legs feel weak like cotton. "Who did you want then?"

'You were the one I wanted.' you thought to yourself, immediately scolding yourself for even thinking that. His hands caressing your face felt warm, they felt like the comfort you so desperately needed.

You felt your cheeks get warmer as he got closer, and for a split second, you thought he heard your inner voice. Despite your worries, Simon didn't look away or leave, he just stared into your eyes as if they were the most beautiful thing he ever saw.

"He's a fool for losing you, sweetheart." his voice echoed in your head, making you feel giddy at the raspy sound of the nickname he gave you. He never called you that before. It slipped so easily off his tongue, sounding so perfect.

Seconds later, you felt courageous. 'Now or never.' the little voice inside your head whispered, taking over your body and inching closer to him. Lips almost touching as you clung to his hoodie, trying to pull him towards you.

Simon was faster, his lips hungrily latching onto yours in a rushed, messy manner. It felt like he waited for this moment all his life, fingers holding your face as close to him as possible. His body slid off the windowsill, standing on his feet and pulling your bodies against each other.

One of your hands rested on his chest, grasping the soft material with your shaky fingers, the other running up his body to find its' place in his hair, tugging on the ends. Your action caused him to groan, deepening the kiss with the way you tilted your head, allowing the two of you to lose yourselves.

It was fast, messy, and greedy. The way he turned you around so you'd lean against the wall, letting him cage you in his embrace made you gasp into his mouth. Simon felt himself growing breathless, but it didn't matter.

That's when you felt it. You felt his love in such a different way than before. It was strong, storming into you like a hurricane to leave your mind a hazed mess. All you could think about was the fast beating of his heartbeat under your fingertips, the way he melted into your body as the kisses slowed down, turning into short pecks.

A string of saliva connected the two of you as you pulled away, catching your breaths. Foreheads touching, Simon's thumb rubbing your swollen lower lip, feeling the mix of spit under the pad of his finger.

You felt heavenly, tears almost spilling again as you realized that your crush on him wasn't just a crush. It was hard for you to admit your love to him, but now you could hear the mean voices in your head go away with the way he held you so close to him.

And for the first time in a while, Simon felt at peace, knowing he was right where he belonged. You were the light he was chasing in the dark tunnel of his life and now he could just have you. He felt your arms wrapped around him so tightly, he couldn't focus on anything else. He felt stronger than ever, cared for, loved.

No words were needed between the two of you as you just stood there, bodies tangled, and leaned against the wall to keep the two of you from falling to the floor from how shaky your legs were.

No words were needed for the two of you to admire the moment of quiet, peaceful breaths syncing with each other.

No words were needed for the two of you to admit how blind you were, not noticing or not admitting your feelings for each other.

No words were needed to express the love you felt for each other, just as it's always been.

masterlist | request info

[purplesimmer455]

Stephanie and Riley wait nervously and sigh in relief as they spot two small figures on bicycles coming their way. (If you zoom into the first photo, Nancy’s hand and fingers glitched all the way out 😳😅 but anyway). Riley scoops Haruo up into their arms while Stephanie picks up Nancy and they give the kids a big bear hug. “I’m proud of you, Ru.” Riley says, kissing Haruo’s cheek and he grumbles but grins. “Good job, Nan.” Stephanie says, stroking Nancy’s hair and she smiles and snuggles into her mom. They also get cute moodlets each, and it’s sweet. 🥰 While Aubrey takes his tired grandkids home, Riley stays for a bit with Stephanie. “They���re growing up so fast, soon they’ll be going out with their friends and not spending as much time with us.” Riley says, a wistful look on their face. “Yeah, of course I want them to grow and expand their horizons and make friends, but it’s hard not to miss those years when Nan would come up to me and ask me to read her to sleep or Haruo would fall asleep in my arms.” Stephanie says softly and Riley nods. “Yeah, I think our parents felt the same probably. As a kid, I was always going out into the woods with my sister, or our group of friends would hang out in one of our backyards and play games or roam the neighborhood. My parents trusted us and gave us the support to go out there and explore and have fun, within reason of course.” They say and Stephanie smiles. “I can imagine that. I feel like if we met as kids, we’d have been best friends cause I was the exact same, always exploring around my neighborhood with my friend and two cousins who lived in my block. I know my dads got all sappy when I wasn’t a snugglebug with them in my preteen and teen years but they understood too.” She adds. “Yeah, it’s just part of growing up sometimes*.” Riley adds. Stephanie shivers a bit too, and Riley pulls her close, kissing her cheek. “Let’s go inside, baby. It’s getting cold.” They say and Stephanie nods as the two start to walk back. “I know a way we could warm each other back up,” she teases and Riley blushes, “Is woohoo all you think about, Steph?” They tease. “Wow Ri, I was talking about making some lemon honey tea for us. Get your mind out of the gutter.” Stephanie says, pretending to be scandalized as Riley snorts. “Sure, baby.” They say, but their eyes twinkle as they look at their wife and take her hand.

[kimberlyannharts]

LAST TIME ON RANGER ACADEMY - Dark Specter has taken over the school! And we can't use this as an excuse for free vacation time because if he gets out he'll take over the universe or whatever. Have we seen this before?

Hope comes in the form of Zilan's anti-Dark Specter machine, but a corrupted Mathis has sabotaged it in a fun little prank. That's probably not as funny as they thought it was.

It's Ranger Academy #12!

= Another instance in how Ranger Academy handled the whole Dark Specter corruption plot than Darkest Hour - dear god I wish Aisha had gotten even a tenth of this much emotion when she saw Rocky and Adam were corrupted

= Well sounds a lot easier than going to a Zeo Crystal Planet in another dimension

= Nika's kind of hilarious btw he's only just gotten back in contact with his old friend and they're trying to save the universe from a Dark Specter takeover and he won't stop flirting with that friend who's still grieving his dead boyfriend. He's been waiting to shoot his shot for over ten years

= Rhianth legitimately looks like he got barbecued here but it's fine. He's too hot to die

= Don't get me wrong Lindy/Sage is superior but Sage/Kartyr is also good if I had to pick a het ship. Pink/Green always gets me, man

= My friends and I saw you across the bar and we're coming to kick your ass (we're all underage)

= I still can't believe THIS book gave us Dark Specter's classic design for his final stand rather than the 2016 series. With very passing day I hate the Evil Radiant Red design more and more

= Also him saying "it's allowed me to become more concentrated" kind of supports my theory that Dark Specter existing here is due to him reforming in some kind of regenerative cycle, and he's still in his "early stage"

= Sage: you think you're so evil? We all have MENTAL ILLNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

= That staff becoming a bow is a good twist

= also yeah yeah Dark Specter got taken out too easily whatever, it's still better than the main series

= Headmaster you truly did nothing for me ever. Nothing for anyone, really

= so as I said in my notes, I think this is supposed to answer that the face we saw in the Green tube were most likely Zilan and Tashi's spirits, but not fully-formed. I guess it was just a little confusing due to them appearing as a big head, and Sage saying "is that me??" - I feel that would have made more sense if Sage and Zilan were legitimately brother and sister and you could connect the dots that they looked alike because of that relation (they already look super similar, so why not just take that extra leap. It would also explain why Sage's parents were there and why Zilan was THAT protective of her)

= also live Sage reaction

= Unfortunately now you're gonna have to listen to Green Ranger teachers, and do you KNOW how crazy those guys are???? Ziggy one day and Riley the next. Major whiplash

= GAY PEOPLE ARE SO ANNOYINGGGGGG

= also "maybe it's time I retired!" Nika, you're like.....thirty. Actually wait, I totally understand him

= I'm kind of mourning the fact that we'll never see Nugget Zord come to pass

= But anyway, the end!!!! Goodbye, Ranger Academy. Video review to come....soon

[luverofralts]

Arkhelios Adventures

“Master Thorne? I'm sorry for bothering you at home, I just needed to talk to someone.”

Adam peeked his head into the front hallway, looking for any signs of the warlock. 

“Master Thorne?”

“Adam! What a lovely surprise,” a voice called from the kitchen. Within seconds, Evren Thorne appeared, looking flustered. “I was just helping Luci with her homework. That stuff's has gotten a lot harder than what I had at her age. I mean, math's not too much of an issue for an architect, but the essays and vocabulary sheets? I'm struggling.”

Adam laughed along with the warlock, but still seemed shy. Evren's heart began to sink, wondering just why his stepson's boyfriend was visiting him. It had to be something bad for the teen to show up all alone.

“Is there something I can help you with?” he asked cautiously. “Is something wrong?”

Adam nodded, sinking Evren's heart even lower.

“I need to talk to you about something that I can't tell my parents. Something I don't understand and I don't think they'd like me knowing.”

Something he can't tell his parents? Is he pregnant? Is he suffering from more complications from Theo?

Evren sighed and gestured towards his office.

“Let's have a talk then. I'm always happy to be an adult that you can turn to. You and Theo can tell me anything.”

"Rien, I don't think that Dad would want us to make magic circles on the floor. He got pretty mad last time."

Fiolett pleaded with her half-sister, but Adrienne refused to listen. Everard silently nodded his support, but said nothing. Once Rien got her mind set on something, there was no talking her out of it.

"Fi, we're so close to something, I can't give up now. If I can save lives, then Dad won't mind. Theo's almost home, and this happens before he can arrive! There's a darkness I can't describe and it's coming! Soon!"

“So what's up? How can I help?”

Adam toyed with his fingers nervously, unable to meet Evren's worried look.

“I had a bad dream a few days ago,” he began, and Evren tried not to sigh with relief. A dream or magic question he could answer. “It involved something bad. Something bad is coming. I don't know when or where, but something is coming.”

“What imagery was there? Were there any symbols that you recognized? Was the fear that something's coming a feeling you had or something someone said to you?”

“It was said to me. Victoriana was being consumed by the Void and gave me two names to look into and said something about following currents in the ocean. I don't understand any of it. But I do have a lead on one of the names, but…it's kinda out of my league. I need advice from someone as experienced as you are. If I tell my parents, they're just going to worry. Ever since I was…injured, they think I'm going to break if I try anything difficult. I know I can handle this with a push in the right direction. I wouldn't have had the dream if I couldn't.”

Evren paused, suddenly intensely interested in Adam's questions.

“Names? What were the names?”

“Atem and a Riley Reeves,” Adam replied, looking hopefully at the adult who could help him solve this. “Theo met with Lukas again, and they said that Riley was their sister. Their dead sister.”

“Hmmm. That does complicate things, but it also may help narrow down what these names have in common. I, too, have been given a list of names from a trusted source. The first two are the same as the names you were given, but I have an extra name. One that has proven to be easier to research than the other two.”

Adam stared intensely at the warlock, unable to hide his interest.

“Who?”

“An Alicia Wenlock. It took some digging, but I found her. She was an artist, a mother, a princess and a veteran of the demon wars. She had one biological son and an adopted daughter. She married into the Crystal Cove royal family when she married Prince Cowen Wenlock.” Evren gestured to the pictures behind him. “She painted these. Several are self portraits or portraits of her family during the war.”

“What does an ancient princess have to do with the sister of a god? Who's this Atem guy? Do you have a lead on that?”

Evren shook his head.

“No, but Spector is a Strangetown name. The oldest, most powerful families still carry it. I was told it was Atem's last name, so perhaps our answer lies there.”

“Did your source tell you what was going to happen? Is something bad really coming? We can stop it, right?”

Evren smiled kindly. 

“Anything is possible when magic users work together. Sharing our burdens with our coven makes hard tasks easy.”

“You can't tell my parents that I had the dream!” Adam shouted, starting to anxiously pace. “If they think I'm in danger or a part of some mission, they're going to lock me in the school and never let me leave! You promised that you'd help me!”

Evren rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on.

“I will contact your father and tell him the list of names that I've been given, and add that there was an additional, secret person who corroborated my own vision. If he has any insight, I'll let you know, but the adults will handle this. You and especially Theo are to step aside on this matter. I'm glad that you trust me enough to come forward with this information, and I will not betray your confidence. I'll see if I can get an answer for you.”

“Okay, but just my dad,” Adam replied, looking skeptical. “If my mom thinks this is related to what Theo did, or that he's involved in any way, she'll never let me see him again.”

“Okay. Just your dad.”

Adrienne watched her stepfather leave in a shimmering beam of light. He and Master Maricourt would surely have an interesting conversation, but one that was far too late. It was all too late.

“We have a problem.”

Evren stormed into the office of the coven leader and closed the door behind him. Ewan looked up from his work wearily.

“When don't we? What's this problem? Please don't say it concerns Theo. I'm just finalizing the paperwork for his return to school next semester, I can't protect him if he's already got himself into a mess.”

“No, this is a personal matter,” Evren said, only half lying. “I had a visitation from an old friend last week with a concerning puzzle.”

Ewan sighed, throwing down his pen on his desk dramatically.

“You certainly know how to get someone's attention, Evren. Tell me more about this puzzle.”

Evren recapped the message he'd received from Reogus and added on the disturbing dream from his anonymous source. Ewan's face grew more grim as Evren spoke. He looked just as concerned as Evren.

“Evren, I have to tell you something that you cannot repeat,” Ewan said, his face unreadable. “If you breathe a word of this to anyone else, I will eject you from this coven myself. Do I make myself clear?”

Evren nodded, but his mind was reeling. He'd somehow wandered unwillingly into something big, and while he was capable of protecting himself, he worried about Adam. If Adam was involved with this, then Theo undoubtedly would be too.

Ewan snapped his fingers and a privacy spell slammed against the door, locking in place. The need for this level of secrecy was never a good sign when dealing with magic.

“You've been very clear, Ewan. You have my word that whatever you have to say will not leave this room.” 

“I appreciate that. You've been a loyal member of our coven from the day you joined and I trust you. What I have to tell you concerns Edana and an incredible abuse of magic she witnessed. There is something…amiss with the world lately. There have been ghost sightings for the first time in centuries. Actual ghosts. Translucent and floating in the air, just like in the stories.”

“But the reapers- that's their responsibility, isn't it? No one can reenter the world after death unless they've been trained as a reaper. That's what we were always told back home at least.”

“That's always been my understanding as well,” Ewan confirmed. “Edana had a dream about her brother and visited his grave shortly after, where apparently, he appeared to her with a dire warning. Apparently, she needs to look for Atem, the grandson of Death. Adam was returned to his proper realm before he could say anything else.”

“I don't think I've heard of Atem before this conversation. I just figured he must be from Strangetown with a last name like Spector. How does he fit in with all of this? What does any of this mean? I mean, Riley and Alicia are long dead, and presumably Atem is also if he's a reaper working for Death. How are we supposed to contact them? By séance?”

“Maybe the link between them is a war? Old Strangetown was always at war, and the Demon Wars went on for almost two decades. Did Riley die in a war?”

“How am I supposed to find out where the sister of the life deity died?” Evren groaned. “Where did she live? When did she live? Does she have a record of existing in any country still around today? This will take a long time to research, if I can even research her at all.”

“Leave it with me then,” Ewan decided. “Do I have your permission to share this information with Edana? She's already begun researching Atem and this information will likely help her a great deal.”

“Of course. Please keep me informed on what she finds. I may be able to help if Reogus trusted me with these names.”

Ewan turned to collect his thoughts as he frequently did in coven meetings. Clearly, their meeting was finished.

“I'll come to you if there is any progress. Thank you again for coming to me with this. I truly appreciate the trust you have in me.”

“Good luck. I have a feeling that we're going to need all the eyes on this as we can.”

[keelt9]

Chapter 8

Powder

Masterlist

“Good morning honey.” Sunday morning is always the same, my parents make a nice breakfast for us to eat in the garden. When I was little in the weekends, after dad came from a mission, specially a hard one, dad usually came with a lot of stress some bad nightmares and troubles for keeping calm, so my mother and I opt for isolated him in our backyard with a nice and just made breakfast, as the time pass and my father were related to a calmer position it was already a routine.

“The painting is in the garage.” My dad says, of course, he won’t let split my disobedience.

I watch my mother asking for help but we both know it was useless. “Yeah, thanks.” 

The rest of the day I spend painting the house, my dad takes mercy of me and helps me for 2 hours then he said was enough for today and I got some rest, I take a quick shower and left for go and visit Penny, my parents warned me we have a special guest for dinner and I must be there.

In Hard Deck, Penny was getting ready for a moving weekend, but she stopped when I entered, giving me a couple of minutes of her attention. I told her the reason why I moved from the house that Riley and I bought, and agreed with me but that doesn't mean she didn’t have her doubts.

“So, when you are approved one more time, where are you going to live?” I help her clean the tables. 

“Here, not in my parents house of course, but I’ll find a nice place.” She puts all the balls from the pool table inside the triangle. 

“And if for some reason you don’t approve?” I stop, strangely I already have an answer for that question. 

“I’ll go back to Pearl.”

Pearl Harbor was where everything began, trying to get free from my father's influence; I moved there in my late teens; my mother almost had a heart attack when I told her but somehow works. My application passed most of the time not related to dad; leaving Pearl in one of the carriers is where I found I really have talent for flying and it’s not some kind of mind trick; I was notified in Pearl they sent me to FighterTown. Riley and I celebrate our first honor on the beach;if I think well, Pearl is a place full of happy moments, I don’t mind going back there and settling down.

“Pearl, huh?” Penny didn’t seem to like my choice. 

“Come on Penny, it will be hard to be here in Miramar watching aviators come and go as I stay, meanwhile in Pearl I can have a new start, maybe finish the college, who knows.” She didn’t answer. “You and my parents are the only ones who tied me here, if the navy said no, I would not like to be here and envy the people who get to be up there.” 

I grab her hand. “That means if it’s a no…”

“I’ll quit the navy.” I smile, because even though I know it will be hard, the truth is actually, I don’t see myself in some desk job, I will be so unhappy. 

As Hard Deck star to full of boys, girls, and people from the navy I help Penny a couple of hours before I have to left.I see Payback, Yale and Omaha having around, still any friendly faces, so I grab my things and say goodbye to Penny, just when I was about to enter to the car she came out. 

“Y/N sorry, it’s not the support you expect but… it just will be hard letting you go and not seeing you wearing even this horrendous jacket or just hanging around with those loud guys.” She is clearly overwhelmed by the thought.  

“I know but you still see me, a new me. Let’s not worry about that yet, ok?” She nods. “I love to keep talking but my parents are waiting for me for a special dinner.” 

She hugs me and I feel her sadness just thinking I could definitely go. “Have fun.”

At home my mother has everything set, so we get ready. Even if it’s not a fancy dinner it must be an important guest because dad is really excited watching his clock and reading a book at the same time. 

At 8:30 the doorbell rings and dad goes to open it; my mother and I were about to walk to the dinner room, when we see Pete hugging my father; in a lovely way too similar to the photo hanging on the wall.

Iceman and Maverick smiling and grabbing his hands sealing a lifetime friendship. 

“Who is the best pilot?” My dad asks and Mav smiles. 

“I’m hungry, you don’t?” All of us laugh.

Pete Michell since I have memory is an important person in my parents life, in mine well let’s go to say it’s like having two dads. He always makes sure to be present in my life, even when dad was somewhere on the planet; he always came home with something sweet for me; from time to time he sends me letters asking how I am or just telling me about how much he pisses off his officer. 

Actually, on my 15th birthday I rushed to his home to tell him I already decided what I want to do. He freaked out, so I had a good base for guessing how my parents would react but when he calmed down and saw the strong conviction in my decision he just said. <Just like your old man, head, and hands cold as ice.> 

My parents told him when I got in Top Gun and he made sure to send me a small cake with a little F-14 on the top to Pearl. When I get to be the first in my class dad can’t let this go and barging about one more time a Kazansky is the best pilot. 

And of course, he was there when I crumbled.

Riley and Maverick met when we got our first honor. Riley was on cloud 9 meeting the famous Pete Michell and Mav was glad to know that someone like Riley covers my back all the time.

A couple of days after the funeral, he told me he lost his best friend in a exercise, he understands the pain and the grief I’ve been through, I never ask him more, who was or how he get out of this because I saw the pain still lingering in his eyes, when I decided to get a full recover in my house he refused to left me alone at least until I can walk without the crutches, I’m pretty sure my parents and he having a constant communication was the  reason they left me go so far away from them with a strange calm.

Like mom and dad, Maverick is a big part of me.

I love this kind of dinners where they don’t have filters and talk like the time didn’t pass, and each time I learn something more about them, as the night passes my body screams for a proper rest, so I said goodbye to all and go to sleep. The next morning, I found empty glasses and bottles on the dinner table, and Mav sleeping on the couch. I giggled probably because the night was longer than I imagined.

The clock hanging in the wall marks 11:30 when Mav enters the kitchen with his hands over his eyes.

“I never imagined seeing Maverick hung.” I smiled at him, and he sat in the stool from the kitchen putting his hand over his face. 

“Here.” I put in front of him a cup of strong coffee. 

“The breakfast is almost ready, so I go and wake up my parents.” He nods and smiles, thanking me and raising the cup of coffee. “It’s nice to have you here, uncle Mav.” 

-

“I can’t believe you are thinking that.” Mav said, putting his cup of coffee on the table, my parents just smiled and looked at each other, we’re just in the middle of the breakfast when I told him if I don’t pass, I will decide to move to Pearl. 

“We told her the same.” My mom stands to pick another pancake. 

“Y/N is ridiculous. Come on!” My dad just giggled. 

“IT’S NOT” I pushed my father's shoulder. “Why does no one think they can reject me?” Mav put his hands over the table and laughed. 

“Sky, can you have a little more trust in you, you put me in a really bad position up there, and that's a lot to say.” I smile and wait a little bit for my mother to join us. 

“Listen, I really appreciate all the blind confidence you have in me but let’s be real, my position it’s not sure anymore and I must have a plan B, and that’s ok, I’ll be ok.” All give me a half smile, not wanting to, they let slip the topic.

When we all are saying goodbye to Maverick my dad can’t avoid messing around one more time. “Pete, the next time, told Penny she didn’t need an invitation to come too.” He got shy at the moment, put on his sunglasses and left home waving his hand. 

“You don’t forgive him a single one, right?” Dad smiles and wink at me.

-

“I’m leaving.” I scream getting downstairs. 

“Hold on, hold on, hold on, young lady.” I smile and turn to see my father reading the newspaper in the living room. “Leaving where?” I sat next to him and put my head on his shoulder. 

“Hard Deck, dagger team is leaving, and I want to say goodbye to them.” He turns the page. 

“And?” I laugh. 

“Have a little fun.” 

He kisses the top of my head. “Be careful.” I hug him and kiss my mother cheek who is entering with a glass of water. “Have fun, honey.”

Hard Deck has a full house, when I get to the counter I see Penny talking and having fun with all the people who are asking for a drink, then she turns around, she sees me sitting and watching the crowd.

“You came” I smile and nod. 

“But I think I arrived at a bad moment.” She denied. 

“No, they are all already he…” She sees the same I saw when I sit; Phoenix in intense play with other people on the table pool, Bob is talking with a nice girl while he smiles to her shyly, Jake is talking with other aviators I guess, barging about how good he is and Rooster well his lips are really busy. She closed her eyes and giggled. 

“Can I offer you something?” I ask for mineral water, another drop of alcohol and my liver will bother me all the coming week. “You look great, by the way.” 

I corrected her. “I look cute.” A blue summer dress is my outfit of the night.

I let the minutes pass, focus on the crowd and think about how much I will miss this if I fail, but at the same time it will be painful and hard to be here, suddenly I hear someone call my name. 

“Sky” I turn, and I see a guy who I can recognize from the dagger team. “They left you in the ditch, huh?” He came closer. 

“Well, they are busy right now.” He scoffs. 

“Come on, let’s play, Hangman always presumes about your fine aim.” I doubt but I also start to get bored. 

“Ok.”

I lost track of time,I was about to throw the next dart, Phoenix pulled me for a hug by the shoulders and lost my balance and hit far away from the center. 

“Why don’t you approach us?” She looks like win more than a couple of games. 

“Damn Nat, I have it.” I close my eyes to the missing target.

“You invited her then let her alone, huh.” I smile and try to get free from Nat. 

“You must tell us, Payback, don't steal her.” She is so strong. 

“Ok, ok, you have me now.” She points with her finger to Payback and Coyote and drags me where Bob is now drinking alone, I wave to them and thank them for the games. 

“Oh, it was actually you.” Bob says when I sit at the table. 

“You almost broke my neck, and yeah it was me.” Nat kept searching for someone in the crowd. 

“If you’re busy, why can't I be there playing?” Nat always will treat me like her little sister. 

“Where the hell is Bangman and Rooster?” Bob and I look at each other, I get it, we both know the answer. 

“Well, Jake is in the bathroom and Rooster is…” Is lovely how good team Bob and Nat have built. 

“Keeping his lips and hands busy.” I cut giggling at the reaction of Nat who just looked at us with open eyes. 

“He is what?” Bob points to our six, where Rooster keeps holding and kissing the girl; Nat didn’t have a chance to answer because Jake sits beside Bob.

“Did you have fun cheating on me? You look beautiful.” He is playing with me, and he notices Nat with her expression about killing someone, he points her to us, and Bob denies and raises his shoulders. 

“Are we having fun, or can I just keep playing with Payback and Coyote?” Jake smiles and all stands walking to the pool tables.

Like Cinderella, when the clock marks the 00:00 in my watch I start to say goodbye. Maybe they left on Tuesday, but I have to go tomorrow morning; a family is waiting to enter their new home tomorrow night. 

“Take care, ok? Never stop talking to her up there.” I hug Bob before going to Nat. 

“You better be back, huh?” She holds me tighter. 

“We work harder to be here for the results, ok?” I felt a few tears in my eyes. 

“Just be safe, that’s all you need to do.” She let me go but holding from my shoulders. Jake pulled me as soon as Phoenix let me go. 

“We’ll be here kiddo, we promise.” I put my arms around his waist. 

“Be safe, but never stop looking good.” He laughs and messes up my hair. 

“I’m always looking good.” 

I turned when I took a few steps. “Say goodbye to the guys.” They nod and wave his hands to me, I walk to say goodbye to Penny, she’s talking with the girl who was with Rooster, but he wasn’t there. 

“Y/N are you leaving?” She asks me when sees me. 

“Yeah, I have a flight early in the morning.” I smile at the girl and jump over the counter to kiss Penny's cheek. “I guess I’ll see you next weekend, right?” She lends me my purse. 

“Affirmative.” She smiles at me. “Take care, ok?” I nod and wave before leaving Hard Deck.

In the night while I was sitting on the little “bench” from my window I talked to myself. “Come on Sky, have a one sided crush is the last you need right now. Put yourself together, there is still a lot to do for having troubles with that.” I laid in bed and remembered Riley's words.

<You deserve someone who loves you with all his heart, mind and soul, not settle with less.> 

*

I let go of Lilian with her friends and I stayed with the rest of my team. 

“She is great.” I hear Coyote talking while he’s paying the bill to Penny. 

“A new girl in your sight?” I ask feeling the dangerous eyes from Phoenix and Penny. 

“I don’t think Hangman will let me.” He says waving his hand to Penny and leaving the bar. 

“Totally right.” Jake kisses Penny cheek before going, leaving just Penny, Phoenix, Bob, and me.

“Who is it?” Phoenix punches me in the arm. 

“Y/N…” Damn it. 

“She was here.” Bob ends her sentence. 

“I told you Bradley, no games if you really like her.” Bob and Phoenix said goodbye to Penny leaving me speechless. 

“Penny…” She cut me off. 

“Rooster, you know I love you so much, but I warn you, Y/N it’s not a girl to mess around, and I won’t let anyone mess around her.” Her face is serious let me know I really fuck off. “Go and rest Rooster, you need to be fine for the deployment.”

[the-void-writes]

For Riley!! 🎮📚🩹🎶🔺🌈🍎💔💘😊!!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH 😁💖 I’M SO HAPPY TO TALK ABOUT THIS KID

Here’s some references for Riley. Credit to Wervty and Naylissah on Picrew for the images

🎮 What are three of your oc's favorite hobbies?

Riley loves guitar and wants to learn how to play it. He also likes exercise, even if Rio’s training gets ridiculous or excessive. To everyone’s surprise, he shows a lot of interest in studying health and medicine. Avery makes him his unofficial apprentice.

📚 What level of education has your oc most recently completed/is currently in (GED, undergraduate, grad school, phd, etc)?

Vesely has a school program for patients, so technically Riley is still getting a high-school education. The last official schooling he had was in junior-high.

🩹 Does your oc have any physical and/or mental disabilities?

I’m not sure if it counts, but since his powers generate large amounts of electricity, it scars his arms and damages the nerves. Too much use of it also starts to affect his heart.

That’s why Riley and Thomas work so well together. Thomas’ phasing means that when they touch him, the electricity can move through his body without hurting him, but he also had less control over it.

🎶 What type of music does your oc like? Do they listen to music very often?

Lots of alternative rock, stuff he can turn on during training and headbang to. He also loves the older rock that Jason listens to like Venus Wonder (the Freaks-universe equivalent of the band Queen).

🔺 Does your oc know how to use any weapons?

Aside from his powers, which generate strands of electricity, Rio teaches him how to use a staff as a conduit while he fights.

🌈 What is your oc's sexual orientation/gender identity? What pronouns do they use?

Riley is bisexual and transgender, the latter of which he is very defensive about. He won’t tolerate being called anything other than “he/him.”

🍎 Where was your oc born? Do they still live in/around their place of birth or do they live somewhere else? How do they feel about their birthplace?

Riley was born in a small town somewhere around Preston (I haven’t come up with a name lol). He hates everything about that town, from the school that bullied him, to the church that called him a demon, to the childhood home where his mother called him horrible names and forced him to wear dresses and regularly called the cops to have someone take this kid away. Thankfully, Jason and Rio were the ones to rescue him, and he’ll never have to see that town again.

💔 What are three of your oc's negative traits?

Riley is incredibly defensive to the point where he starts fights that aren’t necessary. He’s so used to pain and having his heart broken that he lashes out the minute he thinks someone is going to hurt him.

He can be grumpy, even with friends. Kevin lives and breathes to pester him, and though their banter is mostly playful, there are times where Riley says something hurtful. He always apologizes later.

He has little respect for grown-ups or authority figures. There have been days where this highly-powerful and rightfully-angry teenage boy has hospitalized trained officers by electrocuting them. The only adults he trusts are Jason and Henry, and eventually his adoptive parents (Avery gets a pass because he’s still technically a college graduate).

💘 What and/or who do(es) your oc consider the most important to them?

His friends are the most important things in his life. They welcomed him, supported him, and loved him when his family refused to. He says he would kill a man for them, even though he doesn’t really want to.

This also becomes true for his adoptive family. He doesn’t trust them to stay, at first, but he grows to love them dearly.

😊 What are your oc's career/general life desires? What do they want to get the most out of life?

Riley wants to be a doctor. Ever since Jason mentioned it as an option, ever since he showed faith that Riley could help people, Riley’s wanted to follow that path. He never thought he was capable of anything other than destruction, and now he wants to live up to the hope that Jason gave him.

[random0lover]

Requests Are Open!!

For the love of god please put your age in your bio or in a pinned post. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED IF I CANT TELL HOW OLD YOU ARE. Also in the end of it all, you are responsible for your own media consumption. If you decide to go around warnings that is your own choice. Thank you.💞 Also, my blog is a safe space! If anyone need’s to vent or just wants someone to talk to my dm’s are always open. <3

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} Masterlist

Key for works

Fluff = ✨

Light Smut = ☀️

Smut = 🔥

Smut with hard kinks = 🔥💥

This includes CNC (CONSENSUAL non-consent), intense bondage, knife play, gun play, pet play, intense impact play, fear play. I think that’s it but more may be added.

Angst = 🌪️

No Comfort = 🥀

Fem!reader = 🌩️

GN!reader = 🌨️

AFAB!reader = ❄️

No Reader Insert = 🍄

• Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley

🌩️☀️✨] A Day for First’s and Adding A Second

- Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x wife fem!reader, slight NSFW, established relationship, pregnancy mentioned, you and Simon have a son, fluff

🌨️🌪️✨] TF141 x gn!reader That Was a Military Kid

-Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x GN!reader, SFW, angst, fluff, reader is mean and dealing with a lot emotionally, talk of parental death, established relationship, Simon is understanding and caring

-mini series-🌪️🥀🌨️] Open Wounds and War Paint

- Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x GN!reader, SFW, Angst/No Comfort, blood, reader death(?)

-part 2- 🌪️🥀🌨️] Her Past is Their torture

- Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x GN!reader, SFW, Angst/No Comfort (yet), nothing to serious for this part but make sure to read warnings

• Johnny ‘Soap’ Mactavish

❄️✨] Johnny Mactavish Head Canon’s - dad edition (kinda)

- John ‘soap’ Mactavish x afab!reader, SFW, marriage, pregnancy, fluff

🌨️✨] Hot Chocolate & Hoodies

- John ‘Soap’ Mactavish x GN!reader, SFW, Fluff

•Captain John Price

❄️✨]John Price Head Canon’s - dad edition (kinda)

-John Price x afab!reader, SFW, marriage, pregnancy, fluff

🌨️✨]Captain John Price Head Canon’s- SO that has Tourette’s Syndrome

-John Price x GN!reader, SFW, reader has Tourette’s Syndrome, John is supportive, fluff

🌨️🌪️✨]TF141 x gn!reader That Was a Military Kid

-John Price x GN!reader, SFW, angst, comfort, reader is emotionally dealing with a lot, established relationship, John’s a sweetheart, talk of parental death

• Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick

-empty

•König

-empty

•Everyone

🍄✨]Bar/pub owners!141, Los Vaqueros, König, and Kate Laswell Head Canon’s

-SFW, fluff, alcohol mentioned, drunk people mentioned, harassment mentioned, ghostsoap mentioned one time, blood mentioned once

} Random One-Shots

These will be anywhere between 1,000 to 1,500 words

🔥🌨️] “What do you want?”

-Male!dom x GN!reader, Smut, NSFW

} Things I absolutely refuse to write

Be aware of clicking the words in purple. The links lead to possibly NSFW things or topics that may be triggering for some.

- Watersports (what is this?) (not judging just not my thing)

- Pedophilia 😡

- Scatophilia (what is this?) (not judging just not my thing)

-Cannibalism (only time you would probably ever see this is if I’m writing an apocalypse fic but it would not be an important part of it)

-anything involving dead bodies or animals (I mean this in a sexual manner (like kinks people have) as this is absolutely disgusting and horrible)

} Things I’m not exactly comfortable writing

This is not to offend anyone as I would never judge anyone for their kinks! This is me just trying to set some personal boundaries <3

- age play

I have nothing against age play (as long as everyone is playing a legal age). I went through some childhood trauma that makes writing it hard and I would prefer not to write it for my own mental health <3

-CBT (what is this?)

Once again nothing against anyone that enjoys this! It’s just really not my cup of tea and I don’t want to offend anyone or spread any misinformation by writing it incorrectly!

-Tentacles

I myself have read a few fics like this but I don’t ever really see myself writing it. I don’t frequent in erotica like that so I really wouldn’t know what the hell I would be doing 😅

-Electro stimulation (what is this?)

Honestly never heard of it until I started looking into different kind of kinks. It’s definitely an interesting one but not something I could see myself writing.

} A Small Warning

I reblog and not very often but sometimes vent about sensitive topics. This can range from SA (what is this?), Abuse may come up at times (mainly mental and emotional), Childhood Trauma can often come up even if I do not go into detail, and things that probably piss me off or make me angry.

That’s all for now but more may be added as time goes on! If you read all that thank you so much <3

Requests are open

Please read the things above before sending in a request. Thanks my love 💕

[oodlyenough]

I finished Oxenfree II after, I dunno, maybe four or five short sessions of play. I had intended to replay the first game beforehand, but ran out of time before release, lol.

Thoughts (spoilers for all of both games):

I enjoyed 2, but I can't say I enjoyed it nearly as much - if I had, it wouldn't have taken me a week and change to play through, I think.

The art was gorgeous as always, perhaps moreso. They made small QOL improvements that I appreciated hugely, like the map getting marked up, the task list, and ESPECIALLY the little icon telling me if the dialogue would continue when I walked to a new part of the map. The climbing was simple, but fun enough. I deeply appreciated the ability to change the font and text size of the speech bubbles, because I found the default hard to read on.

Some parts were spooky - loved the community centre turning sideways, etc, some good jump scares, the dreamscape stuff was cool. Loved the idea of the time bubbles you got to walk into, and how that was used in puzzles (albeit quite sparingly).

Some less positive stuff:

I liked Riley fine, and Jacob was ok, but that's about... all I felt. They both felt a bit like placeholder characters. I think there is just not as much immediate pathos generated by "two coworkers" as there was between Alex and Jonas, stepsiblings meeting for the first time who both have a lot of baggage.

I also think having a majority of the support NPCs be voices on the radio was a mistake. I enjoyed those conversations, but I had to be reminding myself to check in, and it all felt a bit remote. As Alex, I felt responsible for the whole group, even when I wanted to throw Ren or Jonas or Clarissa off a tower because they were infuriating me. There were different personalities, and also that meant there were different character dynamics to explore and combos you could play with in replays. The NPCs interacted with each other as well as Alex and the player had to manage all of it. Riley felt like she was the centre of a lot of single spoke relationships.

Also, while the parenting as a theme is fine, it's just... inherently going to be kind of remote to me, I guess, as a childless woman with no interest in being a mother. VS I felt the first game dealt with grief in a way I found more accessible, despite never having lost a sibling (or indeed having any siblings to lose, lol).

After the buildup with Parentage (and stories of burning people?!?!), I felt disappointed they were just a hippie uwu cult.

The Alex reveal was my fave, and my interest piqued once we knew she was involved. I see people are a bit mixed on her involvement but honestly I loved it, lol. The downside was introducing her meant I was like "ok, will there be a choice between saving Alex or saving Riley/Camena/etc?" and I knew I would choose Alex no question.

Not quite what happened! I was fairly satisfied with my ending, which was:

-befriend Jacob, but leave him behind (I was worried about Athena! lol)... it was a little unfortunate that Jacob and Riley felt a bit distant as a result, but I loved Riley and Alex getting alone time, so whatever. -leave Olivia to the ghosts

The problem with the sacrifice decision was I did not feel the game gave me any compelling reasons to save Olivia, outside of "Olivia is a teenager so you have a duty of care". Sure, in real life I think letting a depressed teenager go into the void with her ghost parents is a bad call -- but this is a story, and in this story, they have done nothing concrete to make me the player feel attached to Olivia, as compared to how I feel about Riley and Alex, two characters I've now spent hours with. Perhaps I'd have sacrificed Jacob if he was around, but... he wasn't, lol. And maybe not! Because I the player have reason to like Jacob, and no reason to like Olivia.

In the first couple scenes with Rex, I thought perhaps he was Riley's child who had died, and that the death was part of why Riley in present day was a mess and an alcoholic with minimal relationships etc. In retrospect, I think that could have been a very interesting device. The downside I suppose would be that there would then be no reason for Riley not to stay in the void with Rex, making the end dilemma moot.

Still, it was rewarding to see Alex and co leave the island. The game prompts you-as-Riley to be mad at her, but lmao, it's Alex, it's my girl, I don't care. I also thought it was sweet that they had Clarissa as the one who lingers for her. Aw.

Overall, I would give this maybe a 7/10... I don't regret buying or playing it, but I don't feel compelled to replay and try other routes. Oxenfree 1 on the other hand I've played probably 6-8 times and will continue to play again every year or so when it gets dark and cold and spooky outside.

[originalwinnercheesecake]

My thoughts on the 4 new sequels Disney Sequels coming out.

Well for one thing I am glad that they are at least all CGI.  3 of those 4 franchises I do not ever want to see live action versions of, and a live action frozen only has the potential to possibly be a little bit cool. ( rule one: do not let M Knight Shamaulon direct it).

But here are my thoughts on them in defending order.

Zootopia 2: Yes please, make a Zootopia 2 and a 3 after that! Judy and Nick are two cutely designed characters, with fun personalities, who at the end of the first one both become investigative cops, who live in a huge metropolises with all different types of animal and multiple different climates and terrains. There so much sequel potential in that set up, and hundreds of years worth of crime history that can be adapted into it.

Here's a thought, since Judy was the POV character in the last one, can Zootopia two be primarily told from Nick's point of view. Maybe a string of crimes starts happening in his old neighborhood and Nick and Judy go to investigate it, and being there stirs up a bunch of old memories for him. Or the the original concept for Zootopia was going to be about Nick opening up a special theme park for predators where they would be able to safely let loose some (originally predators were going to have to wear "taming collars" around prey animals, that shocked them when they got to excited). Maybe the theme park still gets opened by an old friend of Nick's and he and Judy are charged with keeping it safe from Merryweather supporters. Like I said the possibilities are endless.

Inside Out 2. This one has the potentially to be really good, but could also blow. Inside is a really colorful, cute, and thoughtful look at what it's like to be a preteen child struggling with changes. In it Riley moves from her childhood home to a new apartment in a city far away. Riley has a really hard adjustment to her knew area in the beginning. The movers screw up and lose track of her stuff so she cannot make her new room look like home. Her Dad’s forced to start his new job early and mom is swamped trying to sort out the move, so they do no have as much time to spend with her as hey did before. Last she very quickly becomes homesick for her old friends and favorite places. Mom tells Riley that everything will be better once they get things sorted out, so Riley tries to do her parents a favor by burying her feelings and just smiling until everything gets better but that just makes things worse for her and everyone. The movies climax is when she finally admits how hard a time she is having to her parents and asks for comfort.

The imagery in the movie is cool to. with the core memory islands, the shelf of memories that look like brain matter, train of thought, Riley’s imagination, How Joy and Sadness are consistently thwarted for getting back to HQ until the end, because Riley is still suppressing those emotions. Even right down to that annoying gum jingle that keeps getting sent up to HQ, a.k.a stuck in Riley’s head...Basically a lot of time and care; research into stress, depression, and preteen psychology; as well as different animation techniques and metaphors went into showing you as apposed to telling you what Riley was feeling on the inside and the out... This movie went on to be used as an reference for teaching a lot of kids and some older people how to put their feelings into words: ‘Which emotion do you think is at the center of your control panel right now jimmy? Okay what is that emotion concerned with now?”. I also swear remember a college professor/counselor telling me and a group of people once that the reasons Riley’s core emotions were Disgust, Anger, Fear, Sadness, and Joy was that the first four are all the stages you go through before you feel happy again.

Riley was 11 during Inside out and turned 12 at the end... A sequel will probably take place when she is in High school, so like 14-17 years old. So that means she will be dealing with tests, acne, definitely boys, school dances, maybe learning to drive if she is old enough, possibly health class, Unfortunately maybe people making fun of her for liking a traditionally male sport (Hockey). I do not think the movie would age her as far a 18 and going off to college, not in a second movie at least. It probably will not be as cute as 1 because Teenagers are not as cute as kids. Riley aging into a high school student concerns me for another reason. High school is one of the most cliche settings yo can put a movie/show/media piece in. There is very little an audience hasn’t seen 100 times before. Inside Out 2 will work only if Riley and her emotions are able to maintain and expand the level of character they all had in Inside out 1. It will work only if the writers and story board artists can once again show the audience something new and fun, while also being serious when it needs to, heartfelt, and clever. IF it fails at all of that the movie will bomb. If it only does a passably job it will probably still get low ratings and reviews because people are of course going to compare it against the success of the first one. That’s really what makes sequels controversial. Sequels are good when their aim is to raise the bar from the first movie, not just cost on the first’s popularity. We will see which one Inside Out 2 does.

Frozen 3. Speaking of Movie franchises with a really good first movie, then a sequel that just rode the popularity of the first. Frozen one was a really good movie. It was. Ignoring the over saturation of the market afterwards, ignoring how overplayed “Let It Go” and other songs were, Frozen is actually a great movie. The actors are great, the characters funny and likable. The scenery is beautiful, the story is a classic with what was at the time a modern twist (that got repeated in many movies after), and the plot suspenseful. I remember my one critic of it when I saw it in theaters with friends was that I wished they had spaced the songs out a little bit more, because I had noticed that there were a bunch of them in the first half then none in the second half. Then there was Frozen 2. Frozen two’s plot was confusing. It tried to make the audience not want Arendelle to be saved, when the goal of the group setting out was to protect their Kingdom. It could not managed its cast size and just dropped characters midway through the movie until the very end (Hey where did Kristoff go?). Lastly at its core Frozen was about a pair of sisters growing up together and trying to help each other out. The second movie had both girls as adults and ended with them separating. Elsa can control her powers now and for some poorly explained reason decided she would rather live by herself in the woods. Anna and Kristoff got married and were crowned the King and Queen, which means their story is effectively finished and they probably will not be going on adventures anymore. They do have a Kingdom to run. What’s left to do during a third movie?

I know a lot of people would like Elsa to meet a nice women and enter into a queer relationship. While that would be wonderful a.) Pixar’s censors may not be there yet by the time the movie comes out. b.) Writing a women would have chemistry with Elsa, be patient enough to allow her to open up on her own time (she is so shy and introverted), tough enough to handle life in the woods and the occasional flash blizzard, and has the social skills to win over Anna (most defiantly a requirement for dating Elsa) is a really tall order for a character who comes in so late in the franchise. c.) lets say the censors allow it and the writers put in the work to create this absolutely amazing women. That’s still not really enough to fill the 2 hour time slot for the movie, and what would the other characters be doing at this time?    

Toy Story 5. Why? WHY??? It’s finished! That Movie Line is Finished! It’s been finished twice now? There is room for little kitty books and more 2-8 minute shorts on Disney+. IF done right then maybe a season or two long cartoon of Woody an Bo’s gang touring the parks of he world to be played with by kids and helping carnival toys that want to go home with needy children. Buzz and Jessie could show up from time to time when Bonnie’s family vacation in specials. But the movie Franchise is absolutely finished!

From what I saw Toy story 5 is hinted to be about Buzz. Okay Buzz’s arc was finished after Toy story 2. Movies 3 and 4 were super hard-pressed to find ways to include him. While 3′s focus on his crush on Jessie was sweet and his “Spanish mode switch” was really funny; 4′s subplot of him being confused as to what Woody meant by “your inner voice”  only served to anger his fans, who all pointed out how he was never THAT stupid. Is he supposed to be a lead toy now that Woody is gone? Lead toys are a child’s favorite toys right? Bonnie’s favorite toys are Forky, Dolly, and Buttercup (her unicorn). She loves toys that are simple, whimsical, and she gets to decide what roles they take on in her games. While Buzz held her interest longer than Woody (she doesn’t have a female Space Ranger to play with instead) he has never been one of her favorite toys.

The only thing I still want for Buzz is one more 8 minute short similar to Bo’s Lamp life. Show a montase of him with Andy, Bonnie, and a coupleother owners before he becomes an “old, toy” that no longer holds the lasting intrest of small children, so he joins Woody’s band of “lost” or retired toys.

[mis-zoh]

"AITA for Feeling Betrayed After My Friend Group Unfairly Kicked Me Out?"

I [15f] am a freshman in high school. I moved here in eighth grade and have been friends with them ever since. My friend group consists of Riley, Zoey, Leah, Zara, and I. On a side note, ever since I met Leah, it was quite clear to me (and I'm assuming everyone else) that she did not like me. I always tried to be her friend but she clearly never wanted anything to do with me and was just tolerating me.I usually cannot go to hang out with them after school because my parents are really strict and usually don't like me hanging out with my friend group because they are bad influences on me. Recently, my mom allowed me to go and hang out with my friend group at a pizza place after school.

My friends, without telling me, invited another person to join us whom I did not know and was known for sexually harassing a girl and using being 'gay' as an excuse. My friends were all close to this person but I barely knew them and therefore felt uncomfortable hanging out with them. I bailed on them last minute not only because I felt uncomfortable but because I also could not get a ride home and it was impossible to walk home because my house is pretty far away. I had to leave without telling them because my bus was going to leave if I did not leave that second. I texted them and apology and said that I didn't have a ride home and I will try to make it next time. They just ignored my message and Zoey only responded when I mentioned her crush later. A few days later, I had to stay after school for extracurriculars and was at the vending machine with my orchestra friends getting food. Leah and Zoey were leaving school and we crossed paths and Zoey said, "Hey, I know you," and I said "hi" back. Leah, without even saying anything, grabbed my airpod and because of the force, yanked out my earring which I then found on the ground thirty minutes later, broken. Leah knows about my earbuds being dirty all the time because I just have waxy ears, it's not my fault. My ears of kind of tiny so I need the extra support for them to stay in (I have headphones now). Leah threw my air pod to the floor and said, "please clean your air pods please" and I just said okay and said bye. She did it in front of all of my other friends and I was so embarrassed. This is not the first time she has done this. She always physically abuses me and thinks its funny.

My orchestra friend, who saw the whole thing, said, "that's lowkey kind of bullyish" and I did not know what to say. Then, I decided to keep my space for a few days to cool off from that event. I did not say anything to them and they didn't say anything to me. During lunch the next day, Zoey waved to me but I ignored her because I was still mad about the whole thing. At this point, I stopped trying to be friends with Leah and stopped talking during lunch, I started dreading lunch periods and couldn't wait to go to class. Soon, I had to go to an orchestra event and had to leave before lunch. The next day, I found out from my friend, Alice, (who is in the friend group but nobody considers her apart of their group), that Leah said, "Hannah [me] is a f*cking b*tch and she should apologize" I still didn't understand what I should apologize for.

A few days later, I found out that they had cake in the orchetsra room and Zara forced me to get cake. I went in (because of peer pressure) and asked my junior friend to come with me to get some cake because I was terrified of going by myself. When I got back to my table, which had Alice, Riley, Leah, and Zara, they all (except Alice) demanded that I get them cake. I got kind of frustrated because they always make fun of me for being in orchestra and all of a sudden they want cake which was for the people in the orchestra program. I told them I couldn't get them a slice but offered some of mine to compensate. Leah called me a "f*cking fat *ss" after I gave her a piece and did not give her any more. After I left to throw out my plate, Alice told me that Leah called me a "f*cking b*tch" because I wouldn't get them all cake. Skipping to the last day of school, during study hall, Riley wanted to talk to me about something important, which I could already guess was about Zoey and Leah, who are like two peas in a pod.

Riley says how "Zoey and Leah want me to leave the friend group" and basically lists all of my faults of what I did wrong, which basically was, "you're too quiet, you never speak, you always flake on plans" None of them were my fault because whenever I speak they always shut me down and never let me speak about anything I am happy about. Riley tells me to "privately apologize to them and don't blame my mistakes on other people and that I have to own my mistakes" I did end up apologizing privately to Zoey and Leah next period even though we were not supposed to leave our classroom. The whole friend group agreed that Leah and I should both apologize to each other, but instead of apologizing, Leah said, "at least you apologized" and when Riley asked if we all are good, they said okay, I did not see them after that, but two days into summer break and I am kicked out of the group chat. Usually during summer I do not talk in the ggroup chat because I need a break from socials and socializing. Who is the A-hole in this situation because now I feel like it's my fault. Riley and Zara did end up apolofizing to me provately in Snapchat after I got kciked out of the group. People were telling me that Leah felt like I didn't like her when I was just trying to not speak to her because she did not respect my boundaries, or myself. And she clearly did not like me.

[d010811sh]

What’s your comfort movie? Inside Out

This movie was released in 2015, meaning i was 14 back then.

I remember growing up watching this movie, captivated by how unique and cute all the characters are. The way those memories are stored, how each memory has its own category, and the best part is core memory!

Little me watching this movie and seeing how all of these emotions work made me even more excited since i always find it fascinating by how someone's brain works. That never changes and never will.

But i know one that has changed, my point of view for the overall movie. And i can say that i'm totally the opposite from how i felt back then.

Rewatching this movie again because i can't wait for the second one to arrive, that right now i'm pretty eager to break down some of the highlight scenes that (in my opinion) are the main parts of this movie and why everything makes sense when all emotions take part.

Grownups' Emotions : It's interesting to see the parent's emotions. Riley's mom and dad have more balanced emotions compared to Riley, whose main emotions is Joy. For Riley's mom, sadness seems to take control, and for her dad, Anger (judging by how those emotions are sitting in the middle and by how they're the ones that make command for others). This reflects traditional roles, where mothers are expected to be soft, loving and caring, providing emotional well-being for the family, and sadness may be the right emotion that can represent that. On the other hand, fathers use rational thinking and logic to support and protect the family. Hence, anger is the right emotion to represent those traits. Every emotion has its own spotlight because they are grownups and based on this movie, grownups are expected to understand their own emotions and how to control and express them, that is why Riley's parents' emotions seems to have a perfect balance among each emotions.

The Dent Gum Song : This scene is hilarious because it's true! When the workers of memory eraser keep the gum song and won't get rid of it, it reminds me of those unimportant yet funny and entertaining memories that pop up randomly, like a commercial jingle or an embarrassing moment from childhood.

it is a fact when people say, we have to lose something to gain something. Life keeps moving whether we're ready or not. It hurts to lose something, but that doesn't mean it's always bad. It means you're done with that part of your life and you are ready for something better to fill the hole. We are constantly growing, and we can't bring everything with us along the journey. Just like how Bing Bong realized he had to sacrifice himself so joy could go back to the top of the hill. He knew it was time to let go of Riley and let her move on without him, because he knew that Riley is done with him and she's ready for something better.

Feel. Everything. Don't be like joy, who tries to prevent Riley from feeling anything but happiness. We have multiple emotions for a reason. It's abnormal to be happy all the time, as abnormal as it is for us to refuse to feel it. People who think they don't deserve happiness or avoid it won't improve their lives. If you don't embrace happiness when it comes, you'll feel worse when you're angry or sad because you never allowed yourself to feel happy before even if its only for a brief moment. We shouldn't neglect all our feelings, in fact, i think they help us appreciate things even more. Just like when Riley's team lost because she failed to made a score for her team that she felt sad. But then what happened after that made it to the core memory. Her parents and friends were there for her, cheered her up that she felt happy again. See the power how different emotions complete each other to create a beautiful memory there?

Talk and don't be afraid to have "That" conversation. Riley expressing her sadness and homesickness to her parents and discovering they also miss their old hometown, was a "slap in the face" scene for me. As someone who struggles to express my feelings and overthinks others' reactions, i am more convinced that it's important to let others know what we feel. We can't expect people to understand us if we don't talk. They have feelings, not mind-reading abilities. Besides, you want to know what they think too, right? this can lead to effective, healthy conversation with deep (but again, in a healthy way) feelings involved. And nothing is better than that.

I used to hate sadness. 14 years old me agreed with Joy most of the time. Sadness seemed... sad and annoying and intrusive back then for me. Now i’m almost 23, i appreciate her more than ever.

Many people forget that life's formula isn't about feeling one emotion ; being happy all the time, think that by forcing yourself to feel fine most of the time in hoping eventually that sadness or anger will disappear, or even try to convince yourself that one emotion is the only thing that should be in charge above the others, especially when it comes to vulnerability. They see crying or feeling sad as a sign of weakness, thinking it's humiliating or bad.

If so, please answer these :

How do you express sadness? if the answer is you switch it to anger, don't you think you'd get even angrier when you're mad? Is it really healthy to mix up emotions and avoid certain ones? Why is it so hard for you to use your emotion just like how they are built for you? Smile or laugh when you're happy or cry when you're sad.

Or by humor? well not gonna lie, i also still do this to mask sadness too. It might work temporarily and i understand you do this because you try to "buried" that sadness. But here's the reality, that feeling that you tried so hard to avoid or run away from will slowly crawl back to the surface, and you will experience that break down. badly - trust me.

In most cases, neglecting or mixing emotions doesn't end well, whether in the short or long term. It's important to let each emotion have it's own spotlight and embrace what we feel in the moment. Again, that's the main purpose of having diverse emotions, to represent our true feelings in different situations.

On top of everything, it makes perfects sense for Riley to feel just the way how it pictured in the movie. If joy controlled everything and Riley was happy all the time, it would seem weird, like she's a robot that only understand to be happy all the time because she was programmed to only feel that way. And i think it applies to reality too, it would be strange for someone to appear happy or angry or sad all the time right? You are not a robot so at least feel relief about it and try to use that emotions, okay?

Ultimately, try to accept everything you feel. You don't have to do it in front of others of course, just be true to yourself.

Don't feel ashamed of it because it makes you human.

Don't hide it because it's something that makes you, you.

[misscammiedawn]

Going through today and this post has been bugging me. The lack of detail in the unification of the cluster for one thing and the lack of JOY displayed. It's one thing to write about the cluster sharing skills and emotions and working to their commonalities but it bugs me that we... that Dawn... didn't get more specific.

So here are some Sense8 moments that I felt were very Plural Vibes:

At the end of the second season there is a beautiful moment where Will's father is in hospital and crying for his son. Will's dad reminds us a lot of our own father and during that scene Riley is in Chicago and Will is in London so she goes in his place and for a moment CopDad sees his son through Riley's eyes and... we are lucky enough to have a partner capable of seeing us as individuals and recognizing us from facial expression alone. Heaven knows how she does it. She's tried to tell us before... there is something so beautiful and powerful about being SEEN.

The show had a lot of that recognition of the other and acceptance of their truth on display. Nomi's parents correctly naming her and thinking of her as their daughter was a gross sob moment for Cammie when it happened. Though magic pot brownies cannot cure transphobia. God I wish it could.

When Will's dad dies he starts shooting up on heroin as a way of blocking others out and sealing away the pain (withdrawl doesn't exist in this fiction). The entire cluster come to him and say that they understand he wants to push everyone away and hide from the pain but they need him...

And as the Part Most Likely To Hide On The Roof For Months At A Time I get it from both sides. Being the one who is hurting so bad that she cannot face the world and aspects of herself that need to continue functioning and the desperation of a system that is missing a big part of who they are and wish they could allow for hiding and recovering but it just doesn't work like that. When I am gone we lose our discipline and our focus. We missed medication and ruined our sleep schedule because the little voice that says "GO TO BED" or "NOW MEANS NOW, NOT FIVE MINUTES FROM NOW!" Isn't there. I hate that I am that voice and I've heard every part bitch about me in therapy but they need me and I abandoned them. Worse I abandoned my relationships and they notice when I'm gone.

The show, accidentally, did a good job of displaying the dilemma that is what happens when a part elects to go dormant.

But the joy!? The JOY!

The scenes of the cluster listening to the same music and dancing together or singing along with Wolfgang at karaoke. The scenes where Capheus is thrilled that Riley is flying and his joy is literally infectious and makes Riley enjoy the mundane experience of an economy ticket flight. Rajan kissing his wife good morning while Wolfgang is still piloting her body and he just smiles because the love they feel for him radiates through the cluster. The way Lito screams "I am coming Family!" while including Neets in that list.

The way the positivity radiates through them all is gorgeous and it's something we feel every day. This far into our parts work there's no rejection anymore.

Back when we were younger we would war on things without even realizing we were doing it. We'd hate on ourselves for enjoying "immature" things. Me and Wynn in particular would insist that we were an adult and maybe shouldn't be getting giddy over embarrassing media or speaking animatedly about the differences in Sonic comics over different continents and yet... sure enough, these days the joy of Cammie's joy is our joy. Likewise we don't hate on traces of our dad in us anymore and can support his footie team and remember the days we were at the pub with him enjoying the Saturday kick about and know it's not us romanticizing moments with our dad, it's accepting that a part of us harbours joy in those memories and it's OKAY for him to bring that joy into the present. It shouldn't all be pain and trauma, even if the world tries to make it be.

The show even has a twinge of that. The final 2 episodes include the evil BPO organization using pain as a sonar to find the others in a cluster because pain travels well between sensates and it's like... joy does too. Love does too... but those who view sensates as other and a medical curiosity would be fixated on the visceral pain response. It's easier to observe and easier to trigger. Why bother with anything else, right?

Anyway...

I think we're done talking about this show for a bit. I was just bothered that the post Dawn shared didn't include some of my fave moments.

I Am Also A We - Integration and Functional Multiplicity in sense8

CW: sense8 depicts suicide, transphobia, medical trauma, deadnaming, chronic alcoholism, drug abuse, homophobia, homophobic slurs, intense sexual themes, plays sexual assault towards men for humor. Check DoesTheDogDie for more information.

If you watch the show be warned the first episodes involve a family forcefully trying to (allegorically) detransition a transgender woman and circumvent her agency in a medical setting. This may be more than most can handle.

"I've been thinking about my life, and all of the mistakes that I've made. The ones that stay with me, the ones that I regret, are the ones that I made because of fear. For a long time, I was afraid to be who I am because I was taught by my parents that there's something wrong with someone like me. Something offensive, something you would avoid, maybe even pity. Something that you could never love. My mom, she's a fan of St. Thomas Aquinas. She calls pride a sin. And of all the venal and mortal sins, St. Thomas saw pride as the queen of the seven deadlies. He saw it as the ultimate gateway sin that would turn you quickly into a sinaholic. But hating isn't a sin on that list. Neither is shame. I was afraid of this parade because I wanted it so badly to be a part of it. So today, I'm marching for that part of me that was once afraid to march and for all the people who can't march - the people who living lives like I did. Today, I march to remember that I'm not just a me but I'm also a we. And we march with pride." Nomi Marks (sense8 - Season 1, Episode 2)

Humans are fascinating and varied creatures.

Imagine for a moment, a transgender hactivist in San Francisco, a closeted homosexual movie star in Mexico City, a cop in Chicago, a Nordic expat DJ living in London, an orphaned gangster in Berlin, a bus driver in Nigeria who has never lived in a home with running water, a Hindu bio-chemist in Mumbai and a kickboxer in Seoul whose father owns a powerful investment firm.

Lives so disparate that it would be simple to create walls of division to keep them wholly separate and incapable of acting as a whole...

And yet the show is all about erasing the division between people and as the show goes on these 8 people with all their unique and individual perspectives and backgrounds, will become one and many. A collective as one.

That seems like something I may want to talk a little about.

sense8 is a Netflix drama that ran for 2 seasons (and had 2 specials) between 2015-2018. Created by the Wachowski Sisters of Matrix fame and J Michael Straczynski of Babylon 5 fame.

It is a show about radical empathy, the full spectrum of the human experience and the virtues of living openly and connected in the face of a world that pressures the marginalized to hide and remain divided.

Yet in listening to our contributors, especially those with Indigenous ties or who identify as people of color and/or not bound by the ties of Western medicine, dissociation as it’s been described so far [...] can mean many things that are not helpful. A general consensus from these contributors is that trauma survivors ought never be shamed for doing what they have to do in order to survive, especially because so many of the contexts into which people are born promote division, disconnection, and marginalization. Usually this context is shaped by a dominant culture that relies on separation in its most unhelpful and wounding sense to uphold the power that the dominant culture so readily craves. (Dissociation Made Simple - Jamie Marich)

To acknowledge the flaws in both shows and creators, The Wachowski's tend to have a lens of privilege and blind spots to their works that undermine their messages of radical empathy, most famously their fumble in the diversity of Cloud Atlas' cast and the use of white actors in Asian roles (Natalie Portman was originally offered the role that went to Bae Doona).

sense8 is not immune to this and does have issues with connecting the 8 main characters without consideration to certain biases. Some mild examples are that the Christmas special having all 8 unanimously celebrating the Christian holiday (including a Hindu and a character with religious trauma centered on Christianity specifically) to the unchecked Copaganda and the show completely erases asexuality as a valid lifestyle with dialogue even going as far to say that sex is why we exist and to deny it is to deny being human.

Also as someone with an extreme aversion to depictions of suicide... this show does like to offer suicide as The Only Way Out a lot. The show opens on a suicide and the final episode involves no fewer than 3 attempts by various characters when they are cornered. One even succeeds. Lana's experience with her suicide attempt was important to her coming out as a trans woman. A version of that moment is even depicted in the 4th Matrix movie with Neo (allegorically Lana herself) helping someone else wake to their own identity in a suicide attempt. I do not want to rob her of the transformative power of that event and memory. It's clearly important to her and her work, but it's troublesome that averted suicide attempts are always depicted virtuously in her work. Again... it's a matter of blind spots and biases.

I acknowledge the show is flawed in these and many more respects but it does speak to empathy and connection in a way that though not perfectly placed upon the screen, is a message worth internalizing. Though it's okay to be uncomfortable with how it is presented and opt out.

Regardless of imperfect execution and the early cancellation, it is still a miracle of a show. In many ways it is a show that shouldn't exist. It cost $9 million per episode and its filming schedule required flying between 11 cities for 3 weeks of shooting a piece. It features full nudity, multiple sex scenes involving huge swaths of the cast at once.

To put all of that in perspective, the entire experience is literally bookended by a rainbow strap-on glistening from use.

But... this is not a show about dissociative disorders. Mental illness is only represented in that characters briefly question their sanity. So why am I talking about it in my Media, Myself and I essay series on positive representation of dissociative disorders in fiction?

Well... it just so happens to also feature the best depiction of Functional Multiplicity in all of television.

Functional Multiplicity or "Integration" is a goal in treating complex dissociative disorders where the dissociative system are able to function as a single person with minimal division between parts.

It is important to note that intergration and fusion are two separate concepts and are both valid outcomes for treatment within CDD therapy. Where fusion is the concept of merging all dissociated personalities into a single unified personality, integration allows the system to communicate and cooperate with full access to memories and skills with no inner-conflict exacerbating symptoms.

The final approach in Fraser’s article addresses the issue of fusion or integration, a strong area of potential controversy for those diagnosed with or identifying as DID. Many individuals with DID strongly resist or oppose a psychiatrist or any other provider’s insistence that they integrate the various aspects of their personality into a cohesive whole. This process can feel disrespectful to the members of a system, and if you are reading this passage and have ever felt triggered at the suggestion that you need to integrate, you are not alone. (Dissociation Made Simple - Jamie Marich)

The terms “dissociation” and “integration” have long been synonymous with one another—meant to signify that the only reasonable goal in working with splitting and compartmentalization must be the fusing together of dissociated parts to create one single “homogenized” adult. Daniel Siegel, however, makes a strong case against defining integration as fusion. He asserts (2010a) a different view: “Integration requires differentiation and linkage.” Before we can integrate two phenomena, we have to differentiate them and “own” them as separate entities. We can’t simply “act as if” they are connected without noticing their separateness. But, having clearly differentiated them so they can be studied and befriended, we then have to link them together in a way that fosters a transformed sense of the client’s experience, facilitating healing and reconnection. - (Healing the Fragmented Selves - Janina Fischer)

Acknowledging the separateness and clearly differentiating people to befriend, link and foster a transformed sense of experience, facilitating healing and connection.

Now that sounds like sense8 to me.

As mentioned above the shows protagonists are from different walks of life. Nomi, Lito, Will, Riley, Wolfgang, Capheus, Kala and Sun are all "born" into a "cluster", a nest of 8 connected minds who share their every thought and experience with one another.

The core 8 are able to share control of one another's bodies as well as speak telepathically in one another's heads. "Sharing" and "Visiting" respectively, if we are to play the YA Novel game of naming every single concept in a fictional world.

Each character has their strengths and weaknesses and connections that make up for their weaknesses.

To give an example Lito is an actor who has a little bit of a diva streak. He's good at lying under pressure, he can flirt with women effortlessly, he is deeply in touch with his emotions and he lives in absolute terror of his homosexual lifestyle being discovered for fear it will ruin his career and the comfort he has earned in life.

Wolfgang is ruthless and blunt and so leans on Lito's ability to lie under pressure, something that he is typically incapable of doing because he does not value roundabout methods of deception when he can just brute force his way to solutions. Lito helps him lie when the situation calls for it.

Sun is emotionally repressed, choosing to work her emotions through her fists, though she is one of the most privileged members of the cluster she has more than enough reason to be sad with a father who refused to show her love, the worst brother on the planet, a dead mother and a plot that involves her being wrongfully imprisoned and subject to multiple assassination attempts. She can offer the rest of the cluster her fighting skills but it is Lito who helps her to be able to cry when she needs it. In a beautiful scene late in season 2 a depressed Lito is crying in Sun's hotel room and Sun admonishes him saying that she is the one with reason to cry and Lito responds plainly "But you never would. Maybe that is why I am here."

On the flipside whenever Lito is in conflict about his life in the closet he pulls up Nomi, a transgender woman who has been through the entire coming out process, and leans heavily on her.

Though it takes much of the first season for the characters to understand what is happening to them we eventually get to see all 8 of them completely at home with one another's thoughts and perspectives.

They are separate, yes. But they are of one mind.

This is akin to the end result of trauma focused parts work in therapy. When a person is not yet treated for trauma based dissociation their inability to integrate their experiences creates a fracture and a disharmony that breeds emotional volatility and a breakdown in inner experience.

Disowning requires selective attention, a focusing away from whatever is “not me.” The senses fail to register what is taking place around us; we don’t feel our emotional responses, good or bad; we are in a zone. We can’t “own” our anger or dependence or fear when we don’t feel them. We can’t “own” traumatic events that we haven’t witnessed. We can’t know ourselves as whole human beings because only those qualities valued in a traumatic environment are accessible to consciousness. Segregating intense feelings, though, results in affect intolerance: if we can escape our emotions by automatically and involuntarily shifting into a different part of the self or different feeling state, we never get the opportunity to exercise our “emotional muscles,” and all feelings gradually become more and more intolerable. Inner conflicts are never resolved, just distanced. When that happens, acting out (self-destructively or addictively) and “acting in” (through self-hatred, self-judgment, punitive introspection) become the only avenues for regulating emotions and autonomic arousal. Splitting or fragmentation must become more complex and creative. - (Healing the Fragmented Selves - Janina Fischer)

As the main cluster of the show are able to expand their horizons via empathy and connection to one another they are able to challenge their blind spots and achieve a level of comfort in their world that was not accessible before. From our above example Sun can process her emotions thanks to Lito.

In a similar fashion, in Season 2 Kala becomes guilty about her lifestyle because she discovers that the company she works for is sending inferior medication to Capheus' region of the world and through experiencing life through Capheus' eyes she is aware of her position of privilege and uses her power to make positive change.

Had the show have been able to continue on this empathy would have been the center of the show with Capheus running for political office, Lito embracing his role as a queer icon who can inspire others and Riley risking exposure by touring her music and making contact with other sensates.

Alas. We'll never get the promised potential of the show's premise.

Another factor that was promised but was not fully paid off on was the concept of blockers.

In the show other sensates could visit (but not share) with a single member of a cluster if they make eye contact (Cloud Atlas which shared 3 directors and 3 writers with this show also included this concept of eye contact creating a human connection) and the only way to prevent their intrusion was to take blockers. A medication that cut off their empathetic connections and turned off their psychic ability.

The blocker allegory was about masking and hiding and working to blend in with the dominant culture without standing out. Part of the show's humanity was the characters wishing to go against the narrative that they needed to hide and to live loud and proud and inspire others to do the same.

It would have been interesting to see each of the sensates on blockers learning to act in ways their cluster would without being able to let them take control of their body. Show that the integration of the system is not a matter of separate parts in their own boxes but a cluster that is fully connected and capable of sharing their sole life.

To go back to my discussion on functional multiplicity, the concept of being able to share memories and skills is emphasized as a part of both integration and fusion models.

Sharing roles, responsibilities or tasks also enables other parts to help the System’s successful functioning in the outside world. Then, these parts can grow and mature individually. It also gives the System the opportunity to feel first-hand appreciation for what parts have done and contributed to the System’s survival and success, as well as better understanding of what it takes to keep the System functioning well today. (Got Parts? - ATW)

We are all in this together.

A beautiful thing that the show displays outside of the core cluster is the radical empathy and acceptance that exist within the side characters.

In the final episode of the show Wolfgang's surrogate brother and only true family Felix arrives to the help the cluster Capheus rushes over to him and embraces him exclaiming "MY BROTHER, FELIX!" and laughing with joy. This was Capheus' first time meeting Felix but the empathetic connection travels between them.

The same connection causes Kala's love for her husband to be felt by Wolfgang and allow the three of them to engage in a polyamorous relationship. The final orgy scene of the show literally climaxes with Kala's non-psychic husband exclaiming "My god, I didn't think such things were possible" after a threesome with his wife and Wolfgang who share the same love for him. This is the very last line of the show.

In a dissociative system conflict can breed between parts that are not integrated when their needs, desires and drives are not in alignment.

To give an example from our own life, Wynn is a part that is capable of turning off our empathy. When she perceives a threat to us from the idea of someone emotionally manipulating us (a parent trying to shame/guilt us into ceding to their demands or a partner threatening suicide) she will lock out the rest of the system who may be swayed and force us to act with hostility and coldness. More than once this has ended with us in further danger or emotional turmoil and it leads other parts to over compensate to try and "fix" the damage done when we were "emotionally compromised" by the part acting in our interests of survival over the harmony of the system and our relationships. Especially because the dangerous situations that necessitated her existence are not part of our present and her reactions may no longer be appropriate.

This kind of divide is natural in a dissociative system early in their healing journey.

The range of emotional experience, including both positive (e.g., joy, love) and negative (e.g., anger, fear, grief) affects, plays a vital role in human adaptation by promoting closeness in relationships. Relational distortions result when emotions repeatedly fail to achieve their purpose, when they are persistently activated, or when their expression is blocked or punished. Distortions in emotional regulation (and associated defensive distortions of behavior) refl ect distortions in care (Bowlby, 1969/1982) that manifest as dysynchronies between caregiving behavior and child emotional experience and needs (Sameroff & Emde, 1989) [...] A lasting split between self-preservation and integrative self-regulation leads to a vicious cycle. Extreme affective states become infused into the person’s selfand other-representations (“bad objects,” Benatar, 2003), producing disorganized and unstable mental representations, which further destabilize and fragment affect, perception, and behavior. Thus, dissociation results when extreme stressors necessitate a lasting split of the integrated relationship between self-preservation and selfregulation. (Dissociation and Dissociative Disorders, DSM-V and Beyond - Paul F Dell)

But towards the end of therapy parts, even when activated, are able to act in a way that benefits the stability of the shared life, preventing further dissociation and division between parts.

It is when one part, who wants to deny our condition to prevent thinking about our trauma, accepts that our multiple nature is integral to who we are and how one of our closest relationships function and in accepting this allows for us to carve spaces in our life to exist as a system. To take off the mask. To stop hiding.

To march and state boldly I Am Also A We.

There are times where we worry about using the term "Plural". We view our condition through a lens of psychopathology and constantly try to justify our existence through reading psychology textbooks and working with our therapist and constantly justifying.

We play by the rule books written for us and about us but not by us. Not by others like us. Well... mostly.

One of the quoted books in this essay is from Jamie Marich who is openly a diagnosed dissociative system. Her book is written from an insiders perspective there to promote love and acceptance. I selected her quote at the top of this post with care. She does get it. Got Parts? Is also written by collaborators with DID sharing lived experience.

There are so many things which divide us as people who experience plurality. There is syscourse raging in Tumblr inboxes Just Asking Questions about whether a person should be diagnosed to openly present as a system, there is fakeclaiming trying to witch hunt those who really have a CDD and those who are "roleplaying", the tone policing in support communities that admonish anyone who glorifies or fetishizes that which is a hard to live with disorder...

Over the years we internalized many of these narratives ourselves. We lived in fear of scrutiny, worried for the day we were exposed as Not Traumatized Enough, Not Performing Our Disability Correctly, Not Divided Enough or a number of other accusations.

We still are. It's terrifying to think that at any point someone could just deny all of our truth and no amount of paperwork, testimony or evidence would be able to make us any more legitimate than we already are.

In some regards we shouldn't be proud of being who and what we are. The fact that there is always going to be a part of us stuck in London reliving the worst experiences of our life is not a source of pride.

But we survived.

We survived. We kept one another alive. The part that needed to be an adult when we were a child kept us safe. The part that needed to seal off our heart kept us safe. The part that kept our emotions alive kept us safe. The part that pretended to be what our abuser wanted us to be kept us safe... and yes. The part that handled erotic concepts kept us safe.

We survived and we protected one another and we are the only Family who have been here the whole time. Experienced everything. Shared in all the pleasures and all the joys. We survived. And we will continue to... but not we're not surviving anymore. We're living. And we choose to live together. We choose to be 5 and 1. We are an I.

I am proud of that and this show helped us feel just a little bit more confident in saying that outloud. We are plural... and there is no shame in that. None at all.

-

Forgive me for the less than stellar work on this one. This essay was more a vehicle to talk about positive integration and use the show as a framing device for the topic. Plus I just wanted to be a bit Plural Pride because the show made a compelling argument as to why I should be.

The promised Act 6 of In Stars and Time essay and the Umineko follow-up essay are both in the research phase. Act 6 of ISaT is looking at characters who share a common history and I want to make sure I have some good examples without treading on other creators I respect's toes and the Umineko follow-up requires replaying all of Chapter 7 of that game and it's a long one.

Media, Myself and I is a series of Tumblr Essays for positive depictions of dissociative disorders.

Other essays include:

Time Loops and Dissociation (In Stars and Time) A History of Murder Alters Discworld and Plurality Incidental, intentional and accidental representation Gender, Dissociation and Clinical Stigma in The Third Person Recontextualized Memories in Umineko Derealization in Night in the Woods and Metal Gear Solid The Dangers of Hypnotic Personality Play in Penlight System Origins in The Incredible Hulk Relationships with Systems in The Incredible Hulk The Healing Journey in Mr. Robot

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Books I’ve read so far in 2023!

Friend me on Goodreads here to follow my more up to date reading journey for the year!

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18. One for the Money by Janet Evanovich--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I decided to re-read ONE FOR THE MONEY and I'm going to be honest, I don't exactly remember why. It was a fun and quick refresher, though! The writing style is reminiscent of some of the other books I've read that deal with women who either are PIs or deal with crime. I love that writing style, especially when I'm listening to the audiobooks, because of the sass, the sexual tension between the MC and her love interest, and the quick pacing of the writing. While I enjoyed getting re-acquainted with Plum, there was definitely some words used that made me cringe. It just goes to show how much we, as a society, has changed. For example, there's a scene where the MC says to another character something along the lines of "you speak ghetto one second and normal the next". The use of the word ghetto is a little high in this book but I also see that this was regular verbiage in the 90s when this book came out. Heck, I didn't even realize it when I first read this book over ten years ago. Anyway, I want to read the rest of this series, but we will see if that actually happens LOL.

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19. Princess in Waiting by Meg Cabot--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

PRINCESS IN WAITING is by far my favourite book of the series (so far). Although I wanted to just serve Mia a dose of reality because Michael is so obviously in love with her, but remembering that she's only 14 is a very important thing. Despite her insecurities about Michael, I found that Mia was actually the most mature in this one. I could really see her growth in this one, especially when it came to her empathy and her moments of standing up for herself. I'm very excited to see how the next books go!

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20. Off Limits by Riley Hart--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm rating OFF LIMITS 4 stars simply because of how it made me feel and HOW I COULDN'T PUT IT DOWN. I was such a complete sucker for this book and its many tropes. I loved that these characters essentially fell in love without knowing who the other really was and how their chemistry was so powerful, that it jumped off the page. I loved their love and that they communicated and decided to just go for it. The smut in this was great (especially that first time) and I think it was a good amount that didn't feel overwhelming. Riley Hart really knows how to give us some great scenes 😏 My main complaints, however, are how quickly everything at the end was wrapped up. I had an alternate ending in my head that I couldn't let go of, even as I finished the last page. That's on me, but in a way, I feel like the actual ending felt so anti-climactic. I did love the support that the characters gained from one if the families, and how one of the MCs was able to face the difficult relationship he has with his parents, but I do wish there was more of a...punch to the ending--especially with how emotionally charged the rest of the story was. I love Hart, so I know I'll definitely be picking up more of their books in the future!

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21. Vendetta Road by Christine Feehan--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

One thing I have to give to Christine Feehan--I started this series kind of apprehensively because the characters (particularly the men) were a little hard to get behind. They're commanding, a little insta-lovey, and a bit too dominating. But somehow, the further I get into this series the more I start to see the charm of them? They may be very "You're my woman!", but they will treat their partners with respect and will literally die for them. VENDETTA ROAD is my favourite book in this series so far. This was one of those stories where I kept reminding myself that while these declarations of love were happening, they had literally had just met. But I think it is the dark past, the years of loneliness, and the need to find a reason to live that makes this men falling in love seem so desperate, intense, and immediate. The moment they see their light (their future partner), it's all over for both of the people in the relationship. I think this one was my favourite one so far because of how Ice just loved Soleil in the purest of ways. It was established nearly from the beginning that she was for him and he was for her, no matter the fears she holds and the trepidation he feels whenever he tells her about his past. I loved the scenes of them loving each other, then Ice going to avenge all those who wronged her. It was just so satisfying. This series is also incredibly dark with some of its scenes. I don't know how Feehan can write these books when certain characters say such vile things. I would need to take a break from writing after every chapter. Especially the chapters when we hear about who they're hunting, or another POV of the past we got a glimpse of in the first book. I've already started the next book because of the love interest. Hopefully I'll continue to enjoy this series. Please keep in mind any TWs you might come across before reading this series!

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Have you read any of these books? What were your thoughts, if you have?

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Happy reading!

[panlight]

Anon, please? Esme’s baby not having a name until some whacko book signing is like the illustrated official guide too, where no Cullens have birthdays, none of their parents have names, Jasper doesn’t have any family details at all. Alice’s backstory about her mom, dad and step-mother, but none of them have names. Her maker doesn’t have a name. smyer really doesn’t care, everyone else are just props for Bedward’s story and I think she made up most of the backstories years later prolly. 

What’s really weird about the guide is that some characters DO get birthdays--I think Riley and Bree do. And it’s like, really? Riley gets a birthday but Alice doesn’t? Or then you get someone like Laurent who has a named creator and the creator has his own story (vampire Boris pretending to be the Russian ambassador at Versailles), or Alistair’s creator who not only has a real name but a pretend name and a whole backstory. But Alice and Carlisle’s creators? Nope nothing. (Although I do believe one of the storyteller films gives Alice’s creator a name, it’s not in the guide). These ones especially feel like she never once thought about how Laurent and Alistair became vampires until she sat down to write the guide and then had so much fun with it, because it wasn’t something she was locked into from canon and could do whatever, so we get Astaroth Prince of Hell (aka George) and Alistair’s super dramatic turning. But she had already mentioned Carlisle’s dad and how Carlisle was turned so that’s boring so she didn’t bother fleshing that out any more with names or dates. It’s like how Midnight Sun is mostly stuck sticking to Twilight but then when Bella’s not there then SM has more freedom and she goes wild with stuff like the car chase. 

Someone asked SM about birthdays before and she said something like, she’s have to check her notes but that she probably didn’t give a birthday because once she picks a date it’s locked in and she can’t then later decide to use it in the story somehow (I suppose if she needed an excuse for another party in a future book she could just randomly say it was whoever’s birthday, she since she didn’t bother to assign most of the supporting characters one), and I sort of sympathize with that--to a degree. But like, Alice’s parents names? What reason is there not just to be like, “Their names were Robert and Madeline and the step-mom was Bette” how is that going to affect anything, they’re all super dead now. 

And Esme’s baby its like . . . this baby was Esme’s whole world. She was building a life on her own for the two of them. There’s NO WAY she didn’t already have names picked out. There’s no way she wasn’t cuddling and cooing over this baby, even if it were obvious he was sick and not going to make it, and using the name she lovingly picked out for him. Everything about Esme’s (admittedly flimsy in canon) characterization suggests she was already thinking of this baby as like “Joseph or Grace” or whatever months before he was born. SM knew the baby wouldn’t live so never bothered to name it, but Esme the character absolutely would have.