#But I don't bother to make it... beautiful?

[jellochihuahua]

I think some right-wingers love Fight Club (the movie) because it appeals to a certain strain of "return to monke" anti-modernism that appeals to the kind of guy who reads Ted Kaczynski's manifesto and thinks "hey actually this guy was right". You just have to accept, on principle, that Tyler Durden was right about everything and is the good guy. If you start with that, then what you can get is a very gender-essentialist take on masculinity and a very neo-luddite take on what life is best for humans. As an note, this is my guess at how you look at the movie through this viewpoint. I do not espouse these beliefs, and I also haven't seen this movie in a long time so I might get some details wrong.

The Narrator (Ed Norton) starts the film unhappy because of modern society. When he rejects societal rules and embraces who he really is (a violent, physically imposing, and dangerous man) he is fulfilled. That is because real men are naturally violent and can only be happy by fulfilling their need for violence through actual violence.

Marla in the beginning is suicidal. She stops being suicidal when she begins a sexual relationship with Tyler. That's because women naturally want to be subservient to men, and can only be happy when they are serving the needs strong man.

Modern society is what is preventing men from being "real" men (violent and strong fighters) and women being "real" women (subservient sex objects). By tearing down modern society, Project Mayhem is allowing things to return to their natural state. This will allow people to be happy, because the "natural" state of things is the right one and will make people fulfilled.

Project Mayhem is full of angry men who want to be led by the angriest and strongest man. They are from all walks of life, but primarily the working class. This is because they have recognized that modern society is keeping them from being their true selves, and they can only be their true selves in a patriarchal, anti-modern society. That natural order can only be restored through violence.

In the end, Tyler Durden is successful in basically everything he set out to do. This is because he was right, and is an example of what men should aspire to. Also, it is clear that Tyler is the good guy because he is beautiful, and beautiful people are always the good guys.

If you go into the movie with a mindset that is already gender-essentialist, patriarchal and anti-modern it's easy to see the things you want to see and none of the other things that you don't want to see.

The thing is, everyone knows something is wrong with how things are. Conservatives can also feel that they're being pushed around by forces that don't have their best interests in mind. They are also bothered by the commodification of human life, and sterility and lack of human connection we see in a world that's controlled by corporate interests. They just think that'll all be fixed by forcing people back into roles that they've already rejected time and again. They think we can go back to a way of life "when things were good' not realizing that things were never really good, and that people's innate desire for agency will not actuall fit with shitty, worn-out structures of power.

i dont think fight club was co-opted by the right because they didnt get the satire, it was co-opted because it fuckign kicks ass. they would have co-opted any movie that is that good and has hot sweaty men in it. right wingers aren't aliens, they know a good movie when they see it, the lesson isn't "don't make satire because the wrong people might think its for them" the lesson would be "don't make art that kicks ass" and i'd rather there be art that kicks ass

[karaeilishh]

can u write something about the pet names billie uses 😘😘

☆彡 pet names - b. eilish

✩ - baby

the most common to use. it happens almost all the time; when she wants to comfort you or fuck you. it doesn't matter.

⋆ "come here baby, i missed you"

⋆ "baby, tell me what's bothering you?"

⋆ "thats my baby...you take me so well"

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ love

almost the same, but for her this name means a lot. she prefers to call you like that only when you are alone or she needs to show all her love.

⋆ "its been a terrible day, love. can we just spend some time together?"

⋆ "don't cry my love. i will always be by your side, you know it"

⋆ "come on love, we need to get out of bed”

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ mama

almost always when she wants to tease you or during sex.

⋆ "fuck, mama, just sit on my fucking strap or i'll destroy you”

⋆ "nice dress, mama. i'll deal with you tonight. don't wear anything underneath"

⋆ "damn mama… i can never get enough of you"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ my heart 

at first you found it a little weird, but every time she calls you that, you know she's tired or upset.

⋆ "my heart, can you give me a hug?"

⋆ "i heart you" instead of "i love you"

⋆ "can you not go to work today, my heart? I don't want to be alone"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ my girl 

she mostly uses this name when you are in public or with friends. she likes how you shy when she says "my". billie found it really cute when you first told her.

⋆ "hey my girl. my friends behave well around you?"

⋆ "dude, hands off. that’s my girl."

⋆ "are you cold, my girl? take my jacket, please"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ angel

this name making you shy you a lot, so she always uses it to push you to orgasm or to praise you.

⋆ "i knew you could do it. i’m so proud of you, my angel."

⋆ "come on angel… cum on my face"

⋆ "my angel is needy today, hm?"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ slut

she only started calling you that after you gave her consent. she only uses that name during sex. billie would never allow herself to call you that to really insult you.

⋆ "such a desperate little slut for me, aren’t you?"

⋆ "shallow it like a good little slut you are"

⋆ "you want more? i’ll give you more, slut"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ amore

billie didn't even notice when she started calling you that all the time. but it started after your trip to italy.

⋆ "amore, you wanna take a photo? it's so beautiful here"

⋆ "i turned on the movie you wanted to watch, amore, come on"

⋆ "I just ordered three pizzas for us, amore"

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

✩ princess

she calls you that mostly when she buys you something, which happens all the time

⋆ "I'll buy you this whole store, princess, just ask"

⋆ "you look like a real princess in this dress"

⋆ "don't be shy to ask me for anything you want, princess"

requests open !!

[cheoliedollie]

kiss attack! svt: reactions ♡

☆ ~ OT13

genre: boyfriends svt | sudden kisses | lots of kiss (cheek, nose, lips...)

note by marie: kiss, kiss, kiss ( might be grammar mistakes, srry for that :( ) ♡ as always, hope you guys like it!

s.coups ♡

~ For me, S. Coups would be a guy who gets scared at first, but not so much that he jumps, but rather closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, right after you give him a light kiss on the cheek. He'd put his arm around your shoulders and kiss you back...even harder. To him, you were the most beautiful and precious thing in the world.

jeonghan ♡

~ Jeonghan would tease you until he got something out of you and would wait anxiously for you to freak out and come running to him. But as soon as you, out of the blue, started kissing the top of his head every time he started making a scene, he really understood when his colleagues say they “melt” when their partners kiss them out of the blue.

joshua ♡

~ If you want to be surprised, dating Joshua is the way to go. He knows how to cheer you up even down to the smallest detail and you wanted to do the same for him. So, while watching a movie on TV, you decided to attack him with kisses. At first, Joshua was startled, but once he understood what was happening, he just laughed with you and returned the kisses.

jun ♡

~ Jun was the definition of cuteness, and that was a fact. But it was the boy who always initiated kisses and physical touches, but when you did, after a fit of cuteness generated by him following a computer game, Jun could only laugh and tell all the boys how amazing his girlfriend was.

hoshi ♡

~ Staying at Hoshi's parents' house limited contact between the two of you, even more so because even though you were adults and had been dating for years, his parents put you up in his older sister's room. But nothing stopped you from surprising the boy in his room in the middle of the night, just for a quick “goodnight” kiss and then leaving right after. That certainly left the boy with red cheeks and smiling all the way to sleep.

wonwoo ♡

~ The time Wonwoo spent in the games room was much longer than the time you spent together… almost every time. It didn't really bother you, after all, your boyfriend needed a break from his exhausting schedule. So every 20 minutes, or whenever you felt it was time, you'd run into the room where the man was and leave a kiss on his shoulder. It was a simple thing, no big deal… but when you left the room, Wonwoo would caress the spot and smile as he did.

woozi ♡

~ Woozi spent most of his time in the studio and you proudly accompanied him every day, listening to the songs and even giving him suggestions. And if you think that the moments of affection and love are left out… you're wrong! Whenever he could, Woozi would take a step away from the computer, pat his lap three times and ask you to sit there. You did it with pleasure, wrapping your arms around his neck, kissing him and rubbing your nose against his. For Woozi, this was his favorite part of the day.

dk ♡

~ Dokyeom would scream to be honest. After the little kiss on the forehead while he was reading, he'd look at you, with those sparkling eyes of his, and smile big, asking for more of where that's coming from. Asking for more kisses, hugs, cuddles… asking for everything he should receive. And if you don't… get ready for another Lee Seokmin rambling session.

mingyu ♡

~ Cooking and giving back hugs is a MUST in a relationship with Mingyu! But imagine that specific scene with me...You and Mingu, together in the kitchen, preparing the breakfast after one incredible night together. Your arms involve his waist and suddenly your lips touch his back. He would be SO shocked. Would turn immediately back and try to kiss you back, eventually forgetting about the food on the stove...

the8 ♡

~ The8 wouldn't be the type for too much pda but I think he would be one of the guys who likes sudden kisses the most! Just imagine his little smile after a sudden kiss while he is meditating in the living room. He would try not to show but he is internally screaming.

seungkwan ♡

~ Yk that video of Seungkwan trying to bite/kiss Hoshi? He would try to do that often to you and would get upset when you don't reciprocate it. But one day, he came back after a long tour you attacked him with kisses, love bites, and tight hugs. He fr became the happiest man in the whole world, even got surprised at first, but wouldn't stop talking about it after.

vernon ♡

~ "Wth are u doing babe?" Vernon would be like that at first...but when you say that you're trying to do a TikTok challenge like "kissing your boyfriend and see what happens" he would melt and be like "yes I'm your boyfriend pls do that to me whenever you want"

dino ♡

~ He would find it so cute when you guys are at home. You know that cozy vibes? He laughs as you shower him with kisses and of course, gives you triple back. But please, don't do that in front of Dino's friends. The way they would tease him for the rest of the week, month, even the year...the poor boy won't have peace.

[weirdsht]

How are you, beautiful?. How about your life?. If it doesn't bother you, can I make a request Cale Henituse x isekai reader?.. Where does the reader not want to interfere with the story even though the reader loves this story but the reader is more important and chooses a peaceful life.. However, the reader often ran into Cale and his group made the reader always run away (just helping silently) because the reader didn't sign for it...Cale started to suspect because they met often.Reader often rejected Cale's offers 😂😂..Comedy and chaos

Leave Me Alone! - LoTCF & Reader

tags: gender-neutral reader, transmigrated reader, cursing at the end

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are open and welcome

Buy Me Dessert

Navigation Masterlist

“Ugh… what time is it..? Wait am I late for my classes!?”

You jolted up and rushed to feel for your phone, only to not get a hold of it making your heart drop.

Frantic, you rummage through the bedsheets, hoping you will soon find your beloved device. However, instead of your phone, you instead notice how you don’t seem to be in your room.

As you finally look around your surroundings you can see that you’re in a completely different place. Everything around you looked extra luxurious, you were almost blinded by how shiny everything was. Aside from that, unknown tools are also neatly scattered around the room. You don’t recognise them, but they look like magical tools that one would see in a fantasy anime or manhwa.

Creek.

“Oh my! The young master is awake! I shall fetch the healer!”

Before you could think about where you were and what happened to you, a woman wearing a traditional maid uniform opened the door. She seems to be in shock to see you awake. And so, she disappeared as fast as she came.

Not even a minute later, she came back to the room you were residing in. On her tow seems to be a healer. Once they settled in, the healer immediately got to work to check your body. As they do you wonder how you would be able to play this off. It doesn’t look like you’re in your world anymore, nor does it look like you have a way to go back.

“Miss, who are you? Where am I?”

The amnesia route it is.

“Who am I?”

The maid looks like she’s about to cry and have a heart attack at the same time. You feel bad, you really do, but it’s not like you can pretend to know information when you don’t even know where you got transmigrated. 

“Everything else is okay now except for their memory. The cause is most likely from the impact they sustained during the accident. We don’t know when those old memories will resurface. In fact, we can’t be sure if they ever will. My only advice is to not force them to remember anything as it could do more harm than good.”

With that, the healer excused himself to go to his next appointment leaving you with the maid.

Looking at the maid made you wonder if you’re in a historical manhwa and that you’re a child of a wealthy noble. Maybe you’re in one of those cliche tropes where you transmigrated as the villain and need to try to take down all the death flags waving.

“What are we going to do now young master? First, you lost your parents and now you lost your memories…”

The maid sobbed for a few more minutes before gathering herself and finally explaining your predicament.

Apparently, the only part you got right was the wealthy part. Your name is still [Name] [Lastname] surprisingly enough and you’re a magician’s child. Unlike other magicians who are neck-deep into their research, your parents focused more on commerce. The result of their efforts is the wealth your family has now, the [Lastname] family are as wealthy as nobles because of various magical tools they invent and sell.

“Of course, we are not as wealthy as the Henituse family or any of the duchies in the kingdom.”

Well, that’s a given since the Henituse is on a different level.

…wait Henituse? Like Cale Henituse? From the holy trinity of web novels? Lout of the Count’s Family?

And so that was how you confirmed that you have been transmigrated in your beloved manhwa/web novel as a no-name extra that isn’t even mentioned once.

The life of a wealthy, orphaned amnesiac seems to be good to you. You have everything at your disposal as there are servants at your every beck and call. Income is also a no-brainer as your body seems to remember mana and how it works. Creating and modifying magical tools and potions come to you easily.

In the midst of everything you still manage to find time to support your favourite characters from behind the scenes. You don’t have any plans on stepping into the limelight but you also can’t help but meddle a little since you hold those characters belovedly in your heart.

‘If Cale Henituse can’t stay still and live as a wealthy slacker then I shall do it for him!’

That was supposed to be the plan.

“Good day I am Ron and I am a servant of young master Cale Henituse.”

So why is this goddamn assassin interrupting your tea time at your favourite cafe!?

“Ah, the new hero of the kingdom. What could such a person need with a humble person like myself?”

You blatantly put your guard up, showing the cunning man you won’t give in to his whims.

“A prodigy such as yourself can hardly be called humble. But on that note, our young master would like to avail your services.”

…what now?

“I’m sorry Mister Ron but I do not do commissions. I work to provide for the masses, free from the constraint of an employer even if it’s a temporary one.”

You composed yourself and pushed down the urge to throw a fit right then and there. But Ron didn’t seem to notice your efforts as he slid a bag of gold coins across the table. He probably thinks you’d do the job at the right price.

“Money won't change anything. I have enough to sustain me for a lifetime. Now please excuse me as I only wish to lounge around.”

With that, you stood up and left the cafe.

The days following that weren’t easy. Everywhere you go, you seem to bump into one of Cale’s people. It has gotten to a point where you have to pause your meddling endeavours because they almost caught you a couple of times.

But since when has fate been on anyone’s side in LoTCF?

“I’m Choi Han from the Henituse family I am here on behalf of Cale-nim.”

“I’m Hans visiting on behalf of young master Cale.”

“I am the priestess Cage, I am visiting with Marquis Taylor Stan to conduct business.”

“Can you help this poor soul named Bob?”

“Hello, I’m Cale Henituse. I’m sure you’ve met the people I sent to your house.”

Cale Henituse is more persistent than you thought. He wouldn’t stop no matter how much you try to refuse his antics. It even came to a point where he had to visit you himself.

But still, even if you love his character deeply… there’s no way you would let yourself be caught up in his whims.

It’ll be the end of your peaceful life once that happens.

“Young master [Name] the prince, his Highness Alberu Crossman has ordered your presence in his castle.”

“That fu–”

“Did you say something, young master?”

“Ah no… you must’ve heard wrong.”

You plastered a smile on your face as the maid handed you the summon letter. The maid excused herself after handing you the letter to give you privacy. 

Just before you could open the letter you could hear some rustling from the window. You cautiously approached it as the noise seemed to be deliberate. Once you got on the windowsill you noticed a piece of folded paper neatly tucked in.

Goodluck 

“That fucking piece of shit! Favourite character my ass!”

[ashnwonderlan]

Fuck around and find out, I guess. We tried to tell the dumb SOBs we share a country with, but they're convinced the cheeto will make prices go down, so, sure! burn everything else down. Never mind that the Trump proposed tarrifs will wreck the economy and cost middle class households $6000 a year and another tax break for the uber wealthy will exacerbate both income inequality and the deficit. These dumb fucks could be bothered to pay attentive in civics or econ in high school, or develop critical thinking skills, so here we are. Matt Gaetz for attorney general and elon musk making govt "efficient". I just can't even. I'm pregnant with my 2nd child and I feel low key guilty because what kind of world will I have to raise my kids in. I worry that no matter what I do society will warp my beautiful kind 2 yeast old son who is always smiling into a brain washed misogynistic man convinced women are his due. It's a fucking lot and I'm in a relatively privileged position. My mom is widowed, retired and on a fixed income. She's worried that social security will get cut and she won't be able to afford to live in her house. I don't know what to tell her, cuts to SSI were in all of Trump's budgets the first time around.

It's like having Putin in the White House.

No ideas. No hints of a plan. Just chaos.

[mustainegf]

reader is insecure about her appearance and Jase comforts her :')

FIRST JASON FICCCC!!!!!

𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 ¹⁹⁸⁷

I watched him across the room, his back to me, scribbling down notes on a scrap of paper he'd found on the coffee table. Jason was lost in his own head, humming a bit to himself, tapping his fingers on his knee. That was Jason for you, dedicated. I loved it so much, but a part of me couldn't help but sometimes wonder how someone like that could have ever fallen for someone like me.

I turned away from him to look at my reflection in the mirror, and I caught sight of the small curve of my stomach, the way my thighs touched, how I never seemed to look like the girls in magazines.

The rational part of my mind could recognize that I was being too hard on myself, but at that moment, another voice inside me had almost grown comfortable to tearing myself apart. I let out a sigh that was a little too loud, and he must have heard it, because the next thing I knew, there Jason was right beside me, his hand on my back.

"What're you thinking?" he asked, his voice low and soft, as it was only when it was just us. His calloused fingers slid along my arm, warm and comforting.

"Nothing. Just…" I replied, though my voice cracked, belying me. He narrowed his eyes slightly, seeming to see through me. Jason would sometimes have this weird feeling for things, like he could tell the storm brewing in my head when I hadn't even said anything.

He spun me round to face him properly, his hands coming to rest on my arms. "I don't buy that for a second," he said, his lips twitching in a little smile. But his eyes held that softness that always melted my heart. "C'mon, what's bothering you?

I bit my lip, looking down. "I just...I don't know. I was looking at myself, and I guess I just don't feel good about how I look right now. It sounds stupid I know, but it gets to me."

Jason was silent for a moment, just easing his hands down to take mine. His thumbs circled over my palms in gentle arcs, soothing me, anchoring me. "Hey," he whispered, leaning his head down to look at me. "Listen, it's not stupid. It's real and I get it. But it's also not true. Not even close... you know that right?"

I shrugged, feeling my throat well up into a lump. "You're just saying that because you're nice, Jase. I mean look at the girls around you all of the time, the ones at your shows, the ones in the magazines. They're perfect. I just… I don't measure up."

He shook his head, and I could almost see the sad tinge in his eyes. "Those girls?" He waved his hand like he was shooing the very idea away. "They're not even real, babe. Half of 'em are pretending, the other half don't even know what they're getting into. And anyway, that's not what I want. You're what I want.

I opened my mouth to protest, but he leaned in closer, his forehead pressing softly against mine. "I know you're not seeing what I'm seeing," he said softly. "You're kind, and funny, and smart, and you're beautiful. And when I'm with you, that's what matters."

My face grew hot, and I couldn't force away the tiniest smile, though I knew I wanted to stick to my skepticism. "You make it sound so easy, Jason."

"That's 'cause it is." He chuckled, his thumb brushing over my cheek. "I'm not saying this 'cause I think it's what you need to hear. I'm saying it because it's the truth. You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and that's the first thing I think every time I wake up next to you."

My cheeks flamed red, but his words picked at the lump in my chest until it slowly unwound. "I wouldn't trade you for anyone. Not those girls, not anything in the world."

Jason wrapped his arms around me, pulling me close and I buried my face in his chest, letting myself just feel his heartbeat steady and strong against me.

He leaned back just far enough to cradle my face between his palms, his eyes delving into mine. "You're perfect to me. Every fuckin' inch, every curve, every part of you that you think is to big or too small. And even if you can't see it yet, I'm here to remind you, every single day if that's what it takes."

My throat constricted, but this time it wasn't from the insecurity. It was something else altogether, something warm. I nodded, burrowing my head against his shoulder as the words soaked into me like a sponge.

Jason didn't let go. He just kept holding me, and for a long time, we stood there wrapped up in each other.

[celmian]

"Cooking for Alfred" Damian Wayne x OC's short fanfic.

/Adult Damian (University)

/warnings/ Dirty joke, (18+) language/

Hi, first of all this is just one of the part of the main fanfic I have been written. The oc is now dating Damian and she wants to cook for Alfred on his birthday. You can follow-up the main story in AO3. The fanfic is called 'Damian Wayne x OC : Hunting the witch'. English is not my first languages so, I hope I didn’t mess up anything.

Also, the oc name is Celine Constantine. She is John Constantine's daughter. Hope you enjoy.

_________________________________________

“…Celine, didn’t you used to tell me that you know how to cook?”    “Well, cooking is not baking...”    A picture of two teenagers approaching adulthood walking chaotically in the kitchen… Around the counter island there was powder and the egg panels all over were probably a strange sight that happened in Wayne Manor…a sight that Alfred Pennyworth would not have allowed to happen in normal situations because he wouldn't have to bother cleaning up the mess later. 

...but today is Alfred's birthday. 

  So Celine has a crazy idea. As a resident, she wanted to give him a surprise. So, they have Bruce take the old man into town while the two young men,Celine and Damian, prepare a homemade birthday cake for the butler. The witch Constantine claims to have worked behind the stove at Fine Dining restaurant before...Damian doesn't know in which position. But from the looks of it, she isn't a dessert chef definitely... 

“...Okay, I'm just one of those people who helps prepare the cold kitchen where they serve appetizers and such...but back when I'm in London, I always cook for myself. I just never made dessert. That’s all.” The girl immediately defended her cooking skills. “The pasta with grilled vegetables that you ate the other day was made by me...” With that, both of her hands are now placed on the hips..    “Really?”    Damian Wayne had known that his girlfriend liked to help Alfred prepare food…but he thought she might just be chopping vegetables, preparing meats, whatever like that. Instead of making her own menu like she claimed. 

…The other day, the pasta that Damian packed to eat at university for lunch was so delicious that he asked Alfred to make it a daily menu. The old man smiled suspiciously. It wasn't him who made it, but it was the witch. 

“…Shall we make pasta instead then?” the young man suggested as his head recalled the rich flavor of the fresh pasta and grilled mushrooms, he had eaten the day before…    “It's Alfred's birthday, Damian. We must make a cake...”  

“But the others will come here soon…we have to prepare other kind of food anyway. Why don't you go take care of the savory and leave me here with the cake?” Both Richard Starfire, Raven the witch, and Stephanie Brown...including Tim Drake will be here today for the old man’s birthday. So, if they both waste time on one cake, they won't get anything done into pieces. The young man waved his hand and chased his girlfriend away from his dessert making area, earning a look of pouty face from Celine Constantine. 

"..You? Are you sure you know how to bake?" The girl looked at her boyfriend's face judgmentally... 

“Better than you do.” His hand moved towards the first cake that had been baked, which was so crumbly and incomplete that the whole thing had to be thrown into the trash… Only then the black-haired witch calms down and walked away to do her own duties as well... 

A long time had passed and the whole kitchen was quiet…no sound except the sound of boiling water, the sound of beating eggs, and other sounds of cooking. Celine walked back around to find her boyfriend in the dessert kitchen area, which was also quiet. She saw him in an apron Standing and squeezing cream into a round disc of something. With diligence and expert look. The young girl watched as those slender, beautiful fingers gently put the round plates together. so, she couldn't help but tease him about how skilled he was. 

“You make macarons? Wow. I didn't know that I slept with the Master Chef of dessert every day.” ...This French dessert is so hard to make. Even Celine couldn't make it through just baking a cake...but this Baby Bat showed off his skills in making macarons? Why he’s so annoyingly talented? 

Damian didn't answer…he shook his head and wiped the sweat from his chin. That's when the young girl came to help. using the handkerchief that was placed on his shoulder to wipe away the sweat that was flowing down the small frame of his chin before smiling at the face's owner.    “..Does this mean that if we get married you will be the househusband? Hmm? Dami?” 

“Dream on.” Damian shook his head, expanding his words as he looked proudly at the work on the table. “...Housework is a duty that we must help on both sides. And I have to go to work…Father's company will soon be mine. If I only act as your butler, who will run the company? Hmm, Celine?” Those words weren't very serious... The young man kissed his girlfriend's head as a thank you for helping him wipe his face before walking off to explore the savory side..    “…You....You make a heck lot of pasta.” Deep voice hurriedly commented on the amount of fresh pasta that the young girl had prepared in a pot for the people coming to the party to eat.   “Well, don't you remember the last time Dick ate the entire pot of meatballs by himself?” Celine reminded the young man of Bruce's birthday back in the middle of the year when the eldest of the family accidentally ate a meatball that Alfred had made for everyone all by himself.  “You’re right. Richard must have eaten it all by himself.” Damian Wayne immediately agreed…he nodded before quickly helping his girlfriend clean up the kitchen. Prepare a plate for the guests who will be coming to the old butler's birthday dinner in a few hours. 

In the evening, Bruce, Alfred and Stephanie, who went to help Bruce, arrive at the manor with Damian, Dick, the two girls from Titans, and Tim Drake is waiting. Of course, Damian briefly relents with Tim to stop his eldest brother from eating all the food before the birthday owner arrives.    The old man walked into the house, filled with joy. Starfire and Raven were the ones who brought out the cake. The remaining people sang songs of blessing to the talented butler. Damian stood and applauded silently. Dick sings off-key and loses his voice as Stephanie tries to save the song from crisis but failed. And after Alfred blew out the candles, they all gathered around the grand dining table of the mansion that was full of guests today…    “..This pasta is very delicious. Miss Celine, did you do it yourself?” The old butler was happy… that today he didn't have to prepare huge quantities of food himself. But what will the condition of the kitchen be like? This is something to worry about.    “Yes.” Celine smiled as she proudly watched Richard gobble down her pasta from the pot… 

“...What about macarons? Did you make it yourself? It's just as delicious as the one my friend brought from France.” Tim tried to compliment the new girl in the Bat House that he hadn't talked to much before Damian put down his fork and a smile curled his lips. It was then that Red Robin knew exactly who the person that made this tray of macarons was. “Oh my gosh…”  Tim shook his head, his hand hurriedly put down the dessert… but after a while he reluctantly picked it up and ate it again.    “Wanna bet on who made the cake?” On Dick's side, his hand was still holding the fork around the pasta. Turning to Bruce, who had been eating quietly by himself for a long time… The Dark Knight shook his head. Looking at the large chocolate cake with candles that had been sliced ​​up by Raven and Starfire for the party. Those blue eyes looked at the cake for just a moment and then responded immediately. 

“It’s Damian, obviously.”    “But I think it’s Celine,” Dick quickly bets against…    “..Ahem, Master Bruce, Master Richard. Gambling is not a good behavior to do on this kind of celebration....”  The birthday man sitting next to Bruce couldn't help but cough after hearing that conversation… He took the cake from Starfire and held it in his hand before considering it without tasting it. “I think they both do it together.”    “Accept the bets” Nightwing gave the old man a challenging smile before turning and asking to the two young men who the winner of this bet would be… “Hey! Little D! Celine! Who made this cake?”    “It’s Damian.” …and the answer from the young witch made Alfred stunned because even though he was the one who taught Damian how to bake, he had no idea that the boy would be able to use what he had taught him to do it all by himself. Dick was annoyed but managed to get a smile from Bruce as the old butler and Nightwing took a cash from their pockets and paid the manor a bill each. 

…and soon after the cakes, pasta, macarons, and all sorts of food were eaten by the people in the house, most of whom was Dick, the guests gradually left. They left Alfred a gift. Stephanie left the baking equipment. Damian gives him a cookbook. Dick gives him a new suit. Raven and Starfire buy him a new portable oven. Bruce gave him gloves and a winter coat, but Celine unexpectedly gave the same book as her boyfriend… 

“Damn, I didn't know we were going to buy the same book... and it's the exact same one but in a different language,” the young witch complained about when Alfred has to have the exact same gifts but in difference language without nobody knowing it beforehand. “...And why are you buying a Chinese text cookbook? Shouldn't those things have to be transported by ship?” The two young men were cleaning up the house while Alfred was sent to sleep by Damian. Meanwhile, Bruce handles company work before leaving on late-night patrol. And Celine complains loudly about the gift she has just given the old butler. 

“...Chinese recipes should be read in Chinese. Do you think Pennyworth couldn’t read Mandarin?” Damian frowned at the witch's question. She usually likes to buy books about the same story but in different versions or sometimes in different languages. But today she suddenly complains to him about it… “You can't read Chinese? Can’t you?” So, the young man made this assumption.    …and damn, Damian Wayne really has good instincts for matters that don't matter. 

The girl rolled her eyes, and the young man knew immediately that she was complaining about the whole Mandarin language stuff because she couldn't read it herself…    “I swear to you. Damian…if you start speaking Chinese to me. I'm going to suck your dick until it's rotten-”    “-下流 (Xia Liu)” …and of course, the mouthy young man wasn't easily fazed by that threat. He chuckled before starting to spit Chinese at the other person after knowing that she wasn't good at it...well, he's always been like this...loves competition like a psychopath.    “坏蛋 (Huai Dan)” But then the black-haired witch immediately shot back… she put down the powder box she was holding and put it on the countertop with a look of trouble on her face amidst the young man's bewildered expression.    “..I thought you couldn't speak Chinese?”    “When did I say I couldn't speak Chinese? I just couldn't read it.”  Celine raised her eyebrows with a defiant expression on her face…    “Then from now on, I'll send you a text in Chinese-”    -wad!    And then the box of powder that had been put down in the first place flew towards Damian Wayne immediately as he continued to annoy her. The witch already knew that an ex-assassin like him would definitely be able to catch that thin cardboard box. So, she crossed her arms over her chest, as her boyfriend caught it with precision and looked towards her.    “Did you know…one of your bad habits is throwing things when you don't get what you want?” Damian had seen Celine throw a pillow or sometimes an entire cigarette box at her father...sometimes she had a good reason for doing that. Sometimes there is no reason at all. Celine Constantine was spoiled rotten by her irresponsible father. But she is a spoiled person who knows that she has a bad personality…so Damian can accept it in somewhat of of way.

Because he's like that too.    “..So? Do you want me to describe your bad habits too?” The girl folded her arms across her chest and raised her head to look at her boyfriend with another look of trouble. 

“Go on…” The young man looked at those expressions. He didn't feel annoyed. Instead, he slowly walked towards his lover... a mischievous smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as his girlfriend smiled back and knew that he was definitely going to find something to get back at her... 

“Let's start with what? The size of your dick? I think it should be illegal-”  

“-Celine, we are talking about my bad personality, not what you like but denies that you don't like...” Damian, on the other hand, quickly used his strong hands to gather his girlfriend's mischievous body into an embrace...watching her laughing, pretending to run away but not getting anywhere.    “..So... What about your competitive personality? I swear, if I say I like a horse's cock, you will definitely going to lengthen it to compete with the hoarse-” 

Phew!!    ...and Celine's foul mouth made the arrogant boyfriend unable to bear it anymore. He took the box of powder in his hand that his girlfriend had thrown and dumped it on her head. He knew that Alfred would definitely curse him if he saw the kitchen floor right now. But believe him, it was very satisfying to see a person with a good mouth become silent because of the amount of flour stuck in her throat. She choked, the powders are now all over the sweet face attached to that bad mouth... 

But Celine Constantine wasn't the type to give in even in the most demanding situations… She turned and smeared the powder on her boyfriend's face. Smeared white powder on his perfect body. Damian is inferior. His hands scooped up the powders that had flown onto the counter and threw them all over his girlfriend's face, causing a small war in the kitchen. The one that ended up with Alfred walking in… The old man wanted to come get some water to quench his thirst after waking up late at night. Before coming to see his nightmare come true. Two young people threw cooking flour at each other. Rubbing each other's hair like it was a fun idea...Even Richard, at his most naughty age, had never done anything like this before...Then both young adults get warned by Alfred. Damian Wayne, who even used to be a child with a loudmouth that caused a lot of troubles, but he never caused any mischief like this before. So, he gets warned too. 

…but hey! At least this time Celine didn't start it.    Didn’t she?            “I got 1 point, and you got 0…” 

After fighting until they both were satisfied, the two young people came to take a dip in the water to clean themselves together after the war ended before Damian had to go on patrol with his father... Celine acts like a little kid who likes to play with a duck. She lets the plastic ducky float on the water in the tub. Damian was forced to watch her play with it while having his lover sit on his lap in the tub. 

“Why did I get 0 points when I really am the one who started it?” His thin lips gently kissed the shoulder of the person on his lap. His eyes looking at his wet girlfriend, he is frowning while asking...    "..It's easy because I'm the one giving the scores." Celine pinches her boyfriend's nose at the same time as squeezing the duck in her hand...it very well triggers a feeling of annoyance from her lover. A strong hand squeezed that round cheek, causing her to scrunch up until he had to let go before the two of them could continue their war in this bathroom.    “I think Pennyworth looks very happy… I have to thanks you for organizing this event for him today.” After pounding his girlfriend's face until he was satisfied, Damian Wayne hurriedly changed the conversation to the serious subject before Celine could react… Her expressions changed and nodded her head softly. Continue squeezing the duck in her hand instead of getting revenge on Damian... probably because she was thrilled that her idea made the old man smile this much. 

“...Come on, don’t act like you guys have never done this before…” Celine pouted a little while Damian's smile twitched slightly at the corners of his mouth before he looked away. 

“Actually… Normally we are all busy that no one takes the lead in this matter. Richard and Drake would just stop by for lunch on the day. Gave things to Pennyworth and left… We never got together like this. Until you are the one who suggested it.” ...It was probably the nature of Bat House to always forget the most important matters outside of their night duties… They often forgot the daily lives of those around them. It's something that almost every Bat member been.    “..So, I'm glad you chose to be a normal person and stay here with Pennyworth.” Ever since Celine Constantine entered the mansion, things had started to change a little… Even though she is that kind of person who don't celebrate her own birthday but she did it for others. After receiving Damian's first birthday present. She organizes a party for Bruce. And this time it was Alfred. She comes from the house of an occult detective but doesn't want to continue being the occult detective. Like she knew how lonely their careers were…she chose to be a normal person and spent her time doing things that Damian and the other Bats couldn't. Both are things that John Constantine couldn't do either. 

She chooses to spend time with those who she loves.    Celine gently touched her lover's face when she heard that. Her hand slid down his face before embracing it. 

“...Don't worry. Damian…Whatever you feel like you can't do or find it difficult to do. I will do it for you. You don't have to say or express everything to me. Just be with me, be happy…and I will do whatever you want to do for you.” A sweet voice whispered softly, kissing her boyfriend's forehead once...it was a voice that the young man felt calm after listening to. It felt like he didn't have to try so hard anymore…it felt natural. That would be more accurate to say... 

…Damian Wayne closed his eyes and immersed himself in that embrace for as long as he could. 

______________________________________

P.s.: Damian in this fanfic became softer after dating Celine and she moved in his manor because she decides to study at Gotham's university. Her back story made her father doesn’t celebrated her birthday because John Constantine didn’t celebrate his own birthdays too. Hopefully I will post more of them in the future.

P.s.2 : Yes, She has a foul mouthed like her dad lol

[edwinspaynes]

Why don't you like Cryland? I'm p neutral to them but think they have a couple good scenes

Thanks for the ask! It's rare for me to hate a ship while loving both characters in the ship. Usually I hate ships when I think one doesn't deserve the other or when I hate both characters.

I ADORE both Charles and Crystal. So this is new!

Disclaimer: If you ship Cryland, you may want to skip this post. But if you to read it, I do not have any beef with you. Ship and let ship <3

So, first, they have absolutely no romantic chemistry whatsoever. Like what are they even doing. The chemistry meter is just at 0.

But I think it goes a step further than that for me. I understand that Cryland is almost certainly bi4bi, but the ship reads as very... comphet to me. Not for the bi characters were made straight, but it feels like the show itself felt like it needed to have a compulsory M/F ship so they were inserted. The lack of chemistry especially makes me feel like the writers were like "oh, we should have the girl and a boy have a mid romance so there's something for the straights." It especially bothers me in a show that otherwise does NO pandering to the straight gaze whatsoever, and I find it confusing. Maybe it was an attempt to evade the Homophobic Canceling Chopping Block, but a) Edwin is so gay that a random forced M/F ship wasn't going to make a difference, and b) look how that worked out for them.

Finally, and I think this is probably the real nail in the coffin for me, is that I REALLY WANT TO SEE THEIR PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP. Like, they have a ton in common! They're both mixed kids who dealt with abusive upbringings, and they're both almost certainly bi and seem to be kind of in denial of that fact. They have compatible senses of humor, and Charles welcomed and supported Crystal when she came to the agency. WHY DID YOU WASTE THIS POTENTIALLY BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP ON A FORCED RELATIONSHIP? I want to see them being besties! Shooting the shit! Not flirting in a really silly, forced way!

Last, my petty greivance: "I will always hit a demon with a cricket bat for you" is a great quote. I wish it could have been Charles to Edwin.

[megamindsecretlair]

Oh hon 🫂🫂

I read your url as all one word, so hearing the explanation behind it, it's beautiful 🥹

Whew. I was on tumblr back in the 2013-2014 days before fanfiction was a huge thing on here. I was mostly there for gifs of Sherlock (and as a bonus I still have that random Tumblr Sherlock-inspired song on my iPod lol)

When tumblr announced the porn ban, idk what i was smoking on. I thought it meant tumblr was shutting down for good. But then I got back into Sims during covid and knew that tumblr was still around but juss never bothered to explore.

Last year, my friend asked if I had one and I said yes and ended up discovering a whole world on here lol. I was reading mostly white-coded fanfic and I thought, yknow, I could make a new tumblr and share my writing. I wanted a blog where no one knew me, no one knows it's me, I wanna sink or swim based on just my writing. And when I discovered x black reader? Baby, I never looked back.

And i had juss read a post about someone completely misunderstanding Megamind and the story. They tried to call him sexist and all kinds of BS and I was like nooooo. So megamind stuck in my brain. Chuz ya I'm often misunderstood and I overexplain a lot (as in this post)

And i thought well, I like the secret part. I didn't tell anyone irl either for the longest. My cousin knows now. And I juss went with the dastardly, villainy, underground, spy theme of it all. So it became MegamindSecretLair. 😁

It was supposed to be a placeholder name but ppl started referring to me as Mega and i love it so I don't want to change it.

No pressure tags: @chaos-4baby @sweettea-and-honeybutter @tvchi

what's the story behind your username?

pygmi-cygni

mine's from my favorite constellation, 61 cygni, which is a binary star in the larger constellation Cygnus. it's also very tiny, hence the pygmi bit.

tag someone whose username intrigues you!

@ominoose

@my-secret-shame specifically your ao3 one though

@silvernight-m

@alwaysmicado

[bsaka7]

read a book so lovely u start thinking about shit like "intentionality" and "structure"...

[lesbianelsas]

"I think Rhaenyra is primarily motivated by a deep desire to be known and seen." (x)

"She definitely yearns for the old physical intimacy that they shared. It’s different from what she shares with her current husband and her children. A different form of contact." (x)

"I feel like Rhaenyra is a character who really, really struggles as an autonomous agent. She actually requires at least one person to make an ultimate act of devotion in order for her to find confidence and independence." (x)

"Honestly, I think initially there was just such a desire to connect. I think what you see initially is intimacy, and an intimacy that Rhaenyra shares so rarely." (x)

_

Bonus:

[wonderfull-star]

What is WRONG with him

Peri looks like he just won a competition and is taunting Irep with the prize in his handsXD

And… does Peri often play out such "performances"? I imagine how in school years he often played out such things with Irep, pretending that he was really leaving. And Irep really fell for it. Too bad for him, he was once again subjected to the manipulations of his "enemy".

[glorious-blackout]

Introduce yourself! What’s the story behind your username/what should people call you? 

Picked the username Gloriousblackout for my fanfiction.net account at the age of 15 because those were my favourite Muse songs at the time. Twelve years later, I'm simply too attached to bother changing it 😅

(I also answer to Rachel)

How will you be participating in the Shadowmonkeys Big Bang 2024 (e.g. organiser, artist, writer, artist, reader etc)? 

I'll be a writer, and also looking forward to taking part as a reader 🥰

What are your favourite fic tropes? 

I'm a sucker for a good 'Friends to Lovers' fic or anything with a 'Sharing a Bed/There was only one bed' trope... I also just love angst and hurt/comfort in general more than I should.

If you’re a writer/artist, what’s your favourite piece of work you’ve created for this fandom? Feel free to link it! 

It's been a long time since I revisited it so I'm not sure how well it's aged, but I'm still very proud of my 'You've Always Been Here' series for being my gateway into writing for this lovely fandom and for marking the first time in many years where I was writing a fic purely for sheer self-indulgence. The fact that other people seemed to like it was a lovely surprise 💖

What’s a fic/piece of art in this fandom you’ve loved recently?

I absolutely adore 'Four Walls' by @uhbasicallyjustmilex which I recently binged while stuck in bed for a few days with a chest infection - it was a beautiful, gorgeously written distraction which I was very grateful for and can't wait to read more of 💖

Can also highly recommend 'Maybe Tomorrow' by @applysome which is the most recent fic I read - it's such a beautiful little piece 🥰

Do you prefer reading/writing from Miles or Alex’s POV? 

Don't have a strong preference! I have more multi-chaptered fics written from Alex's point of view so I suspect I'm more naturally drawn to him, but I've finally broken that pattern with my Big Bang fic 😅

What’s an album that you love reading/writing/drawing to? 

'Songs of Leonard Cohen' was an album I kept revisiting during the writing of my Big Bang fic, but my writing playlist changes with every fic. 'Tranquility Base Hotel and Casino' has been an endless source of inspiration in the past and I find classical or instrumental music quite helpful as there's no lyrics to distract you from what you're writing.

Here are some of the songs I listened to on repeat or referenced during the planning/writing of my Big Bang fic 💚

If you’re a writer/artist, what do you struggle with most in your creative process? Is there anything that helps? 

Mostly just motivating myself to write that first paragraph - honestly that stage alone can take months. Once I've gotten over that hurdle I tend to really enjoy the planning and writing process and working through the first couple of drafts is enormous fun. The stage I'm at right now (i.e. the final few edits) are when it starts to feel a bit like a chore - the novelty's worn off and my eyes are more drawn to the flaws in the text rather than anything that makes it good 😅 Chatting with other writers certainly helps me though, as does creating a good writing playlist that fits the mood of the fic.

Have you participated in a fandom big bang before? 

I have! I wrote this fic for the last Shadowmonkeys Big Bang which was immensely rewarding, not least because it inspired the cutest artwork ever from @rock-n-roll-fantasy:

On a scale of one to ten, how excited are you for the Shadowmonkeys Big Bang 2024?

9/10. I'm docking a point for the fact that I'm also a little nervous after working on my fic for so long and the fact that the week I want to start publishing it is a nightmare in terms of my work rota 😅

✨ SHADOWMONKEYS BIG BANG GAME ✨

As we're now officially into the second posting window and the gloomier half of the year, we thought we'd share something hopefully a little fun to keep everyone feeling motivated!

If you're taking part in this year's Big Bang in any way (whether that's as an artist, writer, beta-reader, or just as someone who's going to be reading and supporting the collaborations when they're posted!) and feel like sharing a little about you and your relationship with fanfic/fanfart then please reblog this post with your answers to the questions below 🥰

Introduce yourself! What’s the story behind your username/what should people call you? 

How will you be participating in the Shadowmonkeys Big Bang 2024 (e.g. organiser, artist, writer, artist, reader etc)? 

What are your favourite fic tropes? 

If you’re a writer/artist, what’s your favourite piece of work you’ve created for this fandom? Feel free to link it! 

What’s a fic/piece of art in this fandom you’ve loved recently?

Do you prefer reading/writing from Miles or Alex’s POV? 

What’s an album that you love reading/writing/drawing to? 

If you’re a writer/artist, what do you struggle with most in your creative process? Is there anything that helps? 

Have you participated in a fandom big bang before? 

On a scale of one to ten, how excited are you for the Shadowmonkeys Big Bang 2024?

[theotherrichardpapen]

...because any moment may be our last. everything is more beautiful because we're doomed.

[aquanutart]

When she was a little Kiko, Lulu loved to put on ribbons and appear before the world to show her precious Slorg! Sadly her owner was such a recluse that nobody noticed much, and over the years she forgot performing for others...

Until recently she found all the ribbons she saved over the years and wanted to have fun again!

(She didn't know which ribbon to wear, so she is wearing them all!)

(Lulu won a trophy!!! She is absolutely delighted and is using it to store her ribbons!)

[possamble]

realizing im kind of a weirdo about laios and marcille