#Budgeting for loans
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Sorry, I just need to vent a little bit again... Nnnhhhhgggg!!!
No, but I've just come out of two weeks of time off at work. My next two-three weeks + weekends are already booked with work/conventions/meeting up with people, all of which I do enjoy, but it's all very draining for little old introvert me.
Which means that I need some time alone without seeing anyone and not leaving my house so my social battery and energy levels can replenish. Time that I'm not getting at the moment.
The other day I got a message in a group chat about some friends wanting to meet up. One of those friends has a 4 month old baby so we ask her if she and her husband could suggest some dates that would suit them. She suggested a day that I can't because I'm already meeting up with friends (one of which is in the group chat).
And because I already have so much stuff to do and am barely free, I said that I'm available AT THE EARLIEST around mid November (which isn't even a lie).
So yesterday, the friend who's in the group and who I'm already meeting up with next weekend messages me, asking "you're not even free around my birthday?" (Which is around mid November).
And just... that's not really any of your business? If I say I'm not available, whatever the reason may be, I'm not available.
So I tell her, "no, not really" to which she replies "are you that busy?"
Like... Yes, I'm that busy! I have a ton of work, I have to be at work early the next couple of weeks (which my boss pretty much forced me into), I have to work Saturdays, I have conventions that I would like to go to, you and a bunch of other people have already asked me to meet up and I can't postpone that all the time even though I'd like to and, last but not least, I would really like some time to myself, if that's not too much to ask.
And most importantly: I do not need to explain myself to you??? What, do you want me to share my calendar with you so you can see where I am at any point in the day? I'm not asking her what she's up to all the time, because it's none of my business and because I honestly just don't care what she's doing. If it's important, she'll tell me when I see her.
It's just so annoying! I wish I was more assertive and would actually say something about it but I suck at those things ugh...
Ok rant over
#She can be so... idk what to call it? Rude? Blunt? To the point?#Like... at the end of 2022 I was unemployed for a few months#And we were going somewhere with another friend#And I mentioned that I was tired#To which she went “how can you be tired? You don't work?”#Like... excuse me????#That one friend told us earlier this year that she was going to Japan for three weeks#My first reaction was to be happy for her. I asked her when she was going and where and what she would do#The other friend's first reaction was: “are you staying in a hotel for three weeks? That's gonna be expensive”#Like... really??#That's none of your business?#I doubt she'd go if her budget didn't allow it#And even if she'd have to get a loan for it#That's. None. Of. Your. Business#I just don't get it#But people don't owe you an explanation jfc stop it#ok rant really over#Shut Up Char
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#i might as well die#I'm never going to get my tuition paid#I'm never going to get out of debt (with student loans the one card i had and how much my father piles on)#I'm never going to be able to pay rent#I'm never going to get enough steps#I'm never going to lose weight#I'm never going to finish school#I'm never going to get a good job let alone work in the field i want#I'm never going to actually be attractive#I'm never going to be enough#I'm never going to get out of this damn house#I'm never going to get top surgery or a hysterectomy#I'm never going to be good enough#I'm never going to be loved#I'm never going to have a place of my own#I'm never going to get to travel#I'm never going to escape my father#I'm never going to have anything good#I'm never going to be able to afford anything i want#I'm never going to alive#I'm never going to be anything to anyone#I'm never going to be believed#I'm never going to have a chance to get a tattoo#i might as well be dead#i can't keep a job#i can't pick classes correctly#i can't drive without crashing#i can't budget#i can't do anything right#i can't even die properly
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Recent Acquisition - Ephemera Collection
My Thrift Book, Compliments of Beneficial Loan Society. Thrift Brings Happiness. 1927
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so like does somebody wanna buy me a new car lmao
#looking at budget and feeling nauseous#i don't know how im going to afford. anything#i make approx $2400 a month. i have $450 in credit card bills. i have $200 in student loans. i have $120 in car insurance.#lets set a monthly grocery budget of $150. add another $50 for gas money. that gets me to $970 in monthly bills so far.#that gives me $1430 leftover. lets assume my car payment is gonna be $200 so thats $1230.#ive been told electricity bills in the summer can be fucking atrocious so lets go high and say $300. thats $930 for rent.#which is... not terrible ig.#i just. hhhhhhhhhh. i hate this i hate this i hate this i feel sick i want to not be an adult i want things to be EASY.
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I have ideas for abt 8 drawings so far, but I also have like 30+ physics formulas to learn until the 25th Oct. Knowing me, I might take the irresponsible route and push one of my ideas into the WIP stage
#I'll try- key word “TRY” not to slack off bc this is literally the end of my first year of college#I passed 8/10 exams buuut I still need one to get on the school budget#my parents just took a loan from the bank but I'll still give it another shot#hopefully I'll pass so that we'll keep the money and I could finally buy a proper computer#bc rn I'm stuck w a toaster from 2016#hopefully it won't explode from all the dust that's gathered
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for every "how dare you plan to spend money out of your entertainment budget while i, a complete stranger to you, am still poor" post i see i am buying another $3 worth of crabs
#look. i get that people in bad financial situations are tetchy#which is why i talked myself out of reblogging several stupid posts#but this is just the 'how dare poor people buy starbucks' argument except coming from other poor people#if you wouldn't begrudge a fellow poor person their sugary coffee just because you yourself don't have a coffee budget this week#then shut the fuck up about people wanting to give up a week's coffee to maybe help a website they enjoy#'if everybody donated to my kofi instead of to tumblr then i wouldn't be poor anymore'#yeah probably but also no one knows who you are and you're not specialer than any of the other poor ppl who enjoy this site#meanwhile we ALL know what tumblr is. because we live here#it's like 'why did they donate to save the savings & loan instead of to the individuals in the town who had loans out'#also. why does everyone think that solving the moderation problem is free!!!#that shit is very hard work! it's not a solved problem algorthmically at all#this site has 200 employees and 21 million posts a DAY#crab day#tumblr meta#dove.txt
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my financial literacy class has been the most effective class I've ever taken at school by FAR
#bro this class has me paying off my student loans bc I realized can't afford for them to start accruing interest#and its got me budgeting and thinking about saving for retirement#100/10 amazing class. horrible for my constant panic tho#learned about credit and i am THRILLED to learn its just a game#also learned about taxes which was more fun than i thought it would be#what if i just become a finance bro.#tech sector is burning down and we're about to hit a recession so I'll jump from one suddenly unprofitable career to another#I wont. unless....#heckin rants
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someone stop me i keep finding cute apartments in philly
#they're all near public transport. they're pet friendly. they're all in walking distance of food and groceries????? :I#also they're like... if i pay off a couple more of my loans even if i only make what i'm making now they're in budget??? easily????#and i woulnd't need a roommate????#i mean it doesn't matter atm i still need to save up for all the other fees and such + i want to get my license first but like????#this could be a real thing in a couple years?????#finally?????#i still want to move back to london but for now i'll stick to being (mostly) local#shut up ace#also most of these have gym/pool access which just makes me even more O.O#reminds me of the apartment katie had down in louisiana & ngl i'm so fucking game#one of them is even right across the road from a park so extra win~
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i told myself that i would keep working at my current job at least until i have paid off all the money i spent to acquire the degrees i needed to do this job
but today i did some math and realized that if i stick to my current budget, i will actually attain my master's degree at the same time i will pay off my loans.
its really tempting to get my master's degree then immediately turn in my letter of resignation, just for the bit
#personal#my dream job is to work in a coffee shop tbh#and maybe if i dont have any loans i could make that budget work#maybe#doubtful tbh#but maybe
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might make a silly lil ko-fi goal idk
#a video capture device i could use for future streaming purposes is only like. 99€#i say only cause its cheap but its also out of my budget as is lmao#but also its the same one i loaned from my brother at one point to test so i know it works for what i'd do with it so...#maybe. idk. i need to work on everything else related at first#i dont know my brain is full of goop#night is an absolute mess on main
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Empower
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hey I think budget guides don't work if you're up to your eyeballs in debt. this is just something I've noticed. quite recently in fact
#started my 10-month salary this month AND my student loan payment restarted so i am wholly mcfucked unless something changes real big#i am very literally on a rice and beans budget for the forseeable future
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growing up you always hear “never buy a new car it’s a scam” but nobody ever prepares you for the “10 year old used car with 45k miles on it costs $16k”
#like. at this point. why not just get a brand new car. since i’m gonna have to take out a >$10k loan to buy a car anyways#nahh my budget is a hard $20k or less and i can’t get a new car for that lol#personal
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