#Buck fell first Eddie fell harder

[antisocialpyromaniac]

Buck fell first…

but he also tripped down the stairs and face planted into a wall and the ground simultaneously causing multiple fractures, a concussion and several large bruises. The doctors then told him he was lucky to not be dead again.

[flowersonmymind1016]

Maybe Buck said what he said at the cemetery because he’s afraid of his feelings for Eddie and is trying to convince himself that he can move on/not ruin their friendship🤔

[gayandbifiremenofmine]

Thinking about Eddie confessing his feelings as a way to move on, and Buck completely... Not understanding. Like, why? Why would Eddie, of all people, love him? And for how long? Even if Eddie liked men, he'd never like Buck, not in that way, never in that way.

And it hurts him, to think that Eddie was in love with him, that he hurt Eddie by dating in the same way he once was hurt by Eddie dating Ana, or in the beginning, by him going back to Shannon. He spends so much time feeling like Eddie has just ripped his heart off his chest and bitten into it, blood gushing all around, that he doesn't realize Eddie still hasn't moved on from him. That he still is trying to forget those feelings, which mean they're still there. He still has time, even if it's counted.

So he goes. He tells Eddie. And it's Eddie's turn to not believe him, of telling Buck that he shouldn't force himself to feel something for Eddie just because he fears loosing him. That he doesn't have to pretend.

And Buck tells him. About the small bout of hope in his chest when Eddie told him his wife was not around, even if at the time he was still hung up on Abby. Then how he felt a little disappointed when Shannon was around, but it wasn't that serious then, just a crush. How he let himself get back into old habits with Taylor and then started dating Ali, and how Eddie holding his hand while he was getting wheeled away and into the ambulance was so important to him. How he felt important, seen, found in the middle of a whole ocean when Eddie looked into his eyes and told him he trusted him with Christopher. How the lawsuit and subsequent cold shoulder hurt more than he would ever admit, even if it was his fault. How he felt something between then when they talked in his kitchen and that hope, that crush, came back ten times bigger. How he thought they were walking towards something else, something more. How looking at each other when asked if they were single was a "not for long". How building that skateboard made it cement in his head the thought of having a family, and being a family with Eddie and Chris. How he lost it and felt his whole body, not just his heart, break when Eddie was under 40ft of earth. How he had so much hope for them.

And then it all went sideways, with his family drama and going to therapy, and then. Then Eddie was dating Ana and it was easier to just convince himself it was all in his head.

It didn't make it go away, but he buried it deep into his insecurities and fears so it wouldn't hurt as much, like wrapping sharp shards of glass in cloth, knowing that if pressed it still can hurt. So you don't.

Until a sniper and his large caliber bullet opened it all up for a moment in the middle of the street in downtown Los Angeles.

Buck had to quickly, hurriedly, shove all the pieces of his heart and soul back into the cloth, then wrap it over and over again and try to put it into a box so it would hurt so much anymore.

And then he started to push away, to accept his role as a friend, and be content with that. It was all he could possibly get.

So every glance, touch, affectionate word or gesture from then on were mostly the sharp points peeking from where they should be safe. And that his mind supplied a thousand excuses every time Eddie looked at him with more warmth and fondness.

Until now. Until Eddie told the exact same thing Buck spent years trying to convince himself wasn't true, was all in his head, so thirsty for love that it was seeing mirages.

In turn, Eddie tells him that he didn't know until recently. That everything happening last year was an eye opener in more ways than one. How he hadn't seen Buck as an option until he went to therapy to try and unrepress all of his feelings. But then, when he started to unfurl the jumbled wool and try to make something of it, it hit him like a bus, or a train.

It was so obvious when Eddie started thinking about it, and he felt so dumb, but then everything was in peace so he had time. And with Chris getting older, he just wanted somebody to stay and keep him company. To lay in bed and sleep safe. And he realized almost instantly that that somebody was Buck.

And then, in a flash, Buck was gone. And then he came back, but he wasn't okay, and Eddie knows best than try a relationship when someone's not in the right mindset for it. And the more physically close they got, more emotionally distant they became, until Buck hit him with the opinion that someone else sees him better than anyone else.

That sealed the deal for Eddie, that it all would never amount to anything, really. So he gave up. But he couldn't move on, not really, not without hurting others, if he didn't tell Buck about it all. About the absolute fear of loosing him, about how he wished Buck the best but that he needed time and space to stop wanting Buck so selfishly.

But the thing is that Buck wants him back, maybe even more selfishly than that, but he... He's not the same person. He's changed, and he saw a world where everything was perfect until Eddie wasn't there. He saw how horrible it would feel, not having Chris of Eddie by his side, and if this time it happened and it was his fault... He doesn't know if he'd survive.

But now that everything is out there, said out loud, with true words and tears and heaving sobs... Maybe they can try, and all Buck asks is a little time. To get better, to get on the same paragraph as Eddie because they've been on the same chapter but have missed each other on the turning of pages.

And they can walk together, crawl together, run together. Finally stop and lay on the couch together, because it's not right now but it's in the horizon, and the sunrise never felt more hopeful.

[lover-of-mine]

You know, i think Eddie had his oh! moment already when it comes to Buck, but i don't think Buck had his. I think Buck knows in some level that what he feels for Eddie is different, but i don't think boy did enough soul searching to know why yet.

[softmiso]

suck it and see | eddie munson x reader

🦊 kinktober day 22: deepthroating (ft. eddie and reader's first time together, finger sucking)

🥮 other details: nsfw/18+, ~600 words, realized this could be gn!reader :)

🍁 cross-posted on ao3

“Oh, God,” you gasped at the first sight of Eddie’s cock.

“It’s just me, sweetheart,” he joked.

You looked up from where you were kneeled in front of him, taking him in your hand. Something about the look in your eyes, the feeling of your soft skin against him, halted his joking energy.

Eyes still on him, you sat up a little, mouth hovering over his length. He braced himself, a hand threading itself into your hair. Rather than putting your mouth around him as he’d expected, you pursed your lips and let your spit fall onto his tip. Eddie chuckled in disbelief.

With the added help, you let your hand glide up and down his cock. You went on like this for a tad too long, wanting to rile him up, get him sensitive for what was to come.

“C’mon, baby,” he groaned, “if you keep going, I’m gonna cum like this.”

“We wouldn’t want that, now, would we?” You asked almost mockingly.

Eddie shook his head, gaze still upon you. The look in his eyes was hard to decipher. It was something between desperation and lust—no—greed. He wanted so badly to use your mouth.

And who were you to deny him?

You circled your tongue around his head, tasting the precum that had gathered at the tip, and Eddie’s mouth fell open. Tilting your head, you licked up the side of him, right up a vein that protruded from the supple skin.

“Fu—oh!” He moaned out, taken by surprise when you finally took him into your mouth. You started to bob your head slowly, at a torturous pace, really. You sucked gently on the downward movements, earning a moan from him.

Soon enough, you started to speed up the pace. After a few moments, however, something felt like it was missing. You loved the feeling of his cock in your mouth, but it wasn’t enough. You needed to feel fuller; you needed him deeper.

With that, you took him down, down, down, until he was as deep as possible. You hummed at the feeling of his cock down your throat. It was euphoric, all-consuming. Eddie felt the same, more intensely even, being on the receiving end.

You found a new rhythm, never pulling off too far. You could feel Eddie’s hand tighten in your hair, his hips twitching to buck up. For a moment, you pull off fully, and his eyes widened.

“Use me.”

And back down you went. With that, Eddie’s gaze darkened, and his other hand found its way into your hair. He held your head firmly, pushing down experimentally. You looked up at him, a hand coming up to his hips, silently telling him to move them to his heart’s desire.

Finally, you felt him back where you needed him. He set a good pace, giving you time to breathe every few strokes. Shortly, you’d feel his thrusts become more erratic, his hands trembling where he held you. With every new stroke, his cock hit your throat harder and harder. Tears started to stream from your eyes, and you hummed against him as you had before.

With one more thrust, and a loud groan, he held you down as he came down your throat. You savoured every drop before finally pulling off him gently, so as not to overstimulate him. You both panted slightly, staring into each other’s eyes in awe of what had just taken place.

Eddie’s hand then made its way from the back of your head to your face. His thumb stroked your cheek, gather some of the tears that had fallen earlier. His thumb kept moving, though, now to your lip. Almost instinctively, you took it into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the digit. You saw a glimmer in his eyes.

“You’re amazing, angel.”

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

[kenneth-black]

Eddie fell first but…

…Buck fell harder 🙂

[buckevantommy]

What about all of this is real? We are.

This is not how they end. 

It hasn’t even been a week but it feels like a fucking eternity. It’s not the first time Buck’s been dumped, not the first time someone has walked out on him when he wanted more, but it’s the worst heartache he’s ever felt and he knows– he knows it’s because this isn’t how things are supposed to go for them. 

He’s done feeling sorry for himself. He’s not giving up on Tommy, on what they have together. 

And he doesn’t think Tommy is done with them, either. 

* 

The drive to Tommy’s house isn’t fast but it passes in a blur; between the peak hour traffic and usual gridlock he has plenty of time to ruminate on everything he wants to say, and all the arguments Tommy can throw at him and all the ways Buck can rebut them. 

Pulling into the drive, he doesn’t notice the unfamiliar car parked next to Tommy’s truck. He’s walking up the front path and knocking with insistent force before he even registers leaving the jeep. He’s on a mission. 

Soon as the door opens Buck is barging his way inside. “You don’t get to decide what’s best for me or how I feel!” 

With a resigned, if somewhat bitchy sigh, Tommy mutters, “Come on in,” and closes the door behind him. 

“I know how I feel about you and it isn’t some passing infatuation, Tommy– I love you!” He goes harder than he means to, and heavier on the blame, but he thinks he gets the main points across. 

Tommy stares at him for a moment, not saying anything. Buck starts getting restless again. If Tommy has nothing to say to that then Buck has plenty more. He gears up to lay the rest of his cards on the table–

When someone clears their throat behind him. 

Buck whips around to find a strange man standing in Tommy’s living room, beer bottle in hand. 

“Oh.” A pang of something ugly lances through Buck’s heart. “Guess you moved on faster than I did,” he mutters darkly.

The mystery man cracks a humorless laugh. “Not fucking likely.” 

Buck doesn’t know what to do with that.

“Sal Deluca,” the man says, stepping forward and extending his hand. Buck takes it, incandescent jealousy and the throbbing heartache that’s made breathing difficult all week making way for a numb sort of recognition. He’s heard mentions of Sal, and the face clicks with some old photos he’s seen in Tommy’s photo albums; because Tommy’s old school like that and has printed photos in physical albums people can flip through. Sal is an old friend of his who moved away years ago. “Worked with this lug back at the 118,” he says. “And we are not boning or romancin’ each other.” 

Buck catches Tommy rolling his eyes. 

“In fact, I’m in town for the first time in almost a year and what do I find? This idiot throwing away the best thing that’s ever happened to him.” 

“Sal.” 

Sal ignores Tommy’s warning tone, trains his eyes on Buck, his voice pitched low and sincere. “I don’t even know you, but I know that much.” 

He leaves with a clap to Tommy’s shoulder and something muttered that sounds like, “Don’t screw this up again,” and then he’s out the door. 

“You should go,” Tommy says quietly, when it’s just the two of them standing there, too far apart.

Now that Buck gets a better look at him, Tommy looks tired. Ragged. Like he hasn’t slept in a week. Buck can relate. “No.”

“Buck–”

“Don’t you dare.” He tries sounding fierce but it just comes out broken. He’s never been ‘Buck’ to Tommy and he sure as hell doesn’t wanna start now. That name means they’re over, and he’s not letting that happen without a fight. “I said, I love you.”

“I heard you.”

“And, what? You don’t believe me? Or you think I’m too dumb to know when I’m in love with someone?”

“I never said that–”

“I’ve been in love before, Tommy– more than once. And just because they were women and you’re the first guy I fell for doesn’t make what I feel any less real!” 

“But it doesn’t mean it’s going to last.”

He sounds tired, too. Like maybe he’s been up all night every night thinking about them. Maybe he leaned on Sal like Buck’s been leaning on Eddie; a good friend who lets you pour your heart out until there’s nothing left but a hollow ache in your chest, drained eyes and confusion. 

But the worst part is how resigned he seems, like it’s over and there’s nothing to be done about it. There’s a lot Tommy hasn’t thought through properly. 

“I may be new to being bisexual, but that doesn’t mean my heart is new. And frankly, it’s pretty insulting of you to assume I don’t know what I’m feeling, or how I’ll feel months or years from now.” 

That seems to land like a blow, Tommy’s already creased brow pinching as he looks away. “You don’t have experience with men–” 

And that fucking does it. “I’m not a kid, Tommy! I don’t need you to tell me what I need! And I’m not any of those guys who hurt you– doesn’t matter if they were gay, or bi, or whatever!” Buck wants to yell at him some more: call him a coward, an asshole for predicting the worst in people.  

Tommy shakes his head. He still doesn’t look at Buck.

“You don’t get to just end this because you’re scared. That’s not how this works– we’re supposed to talk about it.” It’s been a constant in their relationship: talking things through. It’s the first relationship Buck’s had with such an open and honest line of communication, and there’s no way he could go back to anything else. 

Tommy looks up, then, and meets Buck’s gaze. His eyes are watery and his words come out choked. “I don’t want to end this.” 

“Then don’t,” Buck pleads, daring to close a bit of the distance between them. 

Tommy pulls back. Not far, and not much with his feet, more with his shoulders, but it’s enough to make Buck’s heart sink. 

Because Tommy is denying himself – like that night before he first kissed Buck and changed his life for the better; he was so hesitant to believe that he was part of their team, too – he’s not letting himself have something good because he doesn’t think he deserves it, doesn’t think it’s real. “We’re not too good to be true.”

“What?” 

“You said that, about the parking space,” Buck recalls. He’s run the conversation over in his head a thousand times since that night.

“That’s.. not what I meant.” Tommy seems less convinced by his own words, now. 

“Every other relationship I’ve had has fallen apart because I didn’t see the end coming,” Buck admits. “Because we weren’t compatible. And part of me was worried with you, at first, because I’d always been the one who ends up alone.” It’s painful to think about, to think Tommy could be just another in a long line of people Buck wore his heart on his sleeve for but who didn’t want him as much in return. “But you kept proving to me over, and over that you were there for me, and you wanted me around, and you didn’t think I was too much.” Buck has to swallow around the desperate rasp coming through in his voice now. He blinks to keep his vision clear.

There’s something there, then: a look on Tommy’s face telling him plainly that he could never be too much for him, that that’s not what this about. And there’s something else familiar, too: fear. The same glimpse of fear Buck saw that night before Tommy walked out on him. The same kind of fear Buck’s seen in the mirror his whole life. 

Tommy’s afraid they won’t last. 

Tommy’s afraid he’s not enough. 

“Please don’t think like that,” Buck pleads again. “Like there’s an expiration date for us.” 

“I can’t help it.”

“Yes, you can!” Buck erupts again, frustrated with how willing Tommy is to just roll over and let their relationship die. “Just believe in us! Tell me what I have to do to get you to believe how serious I am about you– how much I care about you, and see you for who you are, and want all of you for as long as possible.” 

Tommy shakes his head, eyes downcast, and Buck can’t take it anymore– he closes the remaining distance between them. Stands toe to toe with Tommy, proximity alone silently demanding he listen to what he has to say.

“Hey,” he says softly, but with that same dogged determination that’s been distilled over the years into something less reckless and more mindful. He curls a finger under Tommy’s chin, gently nudging it up until he looks at him. 

There’s armor in place, but Tommy’s peeking through. And he hasn’t moved away. He hasn’t given up, not completely. He needs Buck to fight for them, to know they’re worth fighting for. Maybe then he’ll finally believe they can make it.

“I love you. I’ve been searching my whole life for a love like this, so don’t tell me this isn’t real– I know how I feel,” Buck insists, then calms. “And I think you feel the same.” 

“Evan–”

“I’m not giving up on us. So you can fight me, or you can fight for us.” 

Tommy exhales a shaky breath, averting his eyes again. Buck can see the tears making them wet, tracking down his cheeks as he ducks his head. He can hear them in the way Tommy’s voice wavers. “You think too highly of me, kid.” It’s not a jab, the name. Tommy’s protecting his vulnerable underbelly. 

“Do you trust me?” 

Tommy takes a beat. “I want to,” he confesses, quiet in the small space where their bodies don’t touch, could touch but not yet; he’s holding his breath. 

Buck braces himself. “Do you love me?” It’s a simple question, one he’s pretty sure he knows the answer to. But those few seconds before Tommy speaks are nerve wracking as hell and long enough for a thread of doubt to try to weave its way back into his mind – the same doubt he’d finally quashed before he jumped in his jeep and drove across town: what if he read this all wrong? What if Tommy doesn’t actually love him? His own breath catches painfully in his lungs; he’s on a precipice, heart balanced for a freefall that could see him plummet to the ground, or.. or spread wings, and.. fly. 

Tommy lifts his head, his beautiful eyes rimmed red and making his irises that much bluer by contrast. “Evan, I’m so in love with you,” he breathes out; a sigh of anguish, like truth and painful honesty, airing grievance out into the world so that it might ease the weight sitting on his chest, the kind that makes it hard to breath, hard to exist. “You’ll be the death of me, kid.” 

It’s not the first time he’s said that, although the other times were under very different circumstances. But it was always playful, and Buck can see the words for what they are now: a defense mechanism. Buck’s heart aches for him, but Tommy’s admission also sets something aglow in his own chest, something warm and pure and precious. “I’m not going to hurt you,” he promises. 

“You don’t know that.” 

“I do know it. We’ve both been hurt before– but we don’t need to hurt each other. And, I get it– you were trying to protect yourself when you walked out on me that night.”

Tommy moves to turn away, ends up just shuffling in place. He still wants to be close to Buck. 

“Why can’t we just try? ‘Cause if you think you’re the only one who’d be heartbroken if this doesn’t work out, you’re wrong.” He’s realized some things this past week: he doesn’t adhere to whatever bullshit stereotype there is about men who are bi or people who come to terms with their queerness later in life – he doesn’t need to play the field or experiment or whatever crap Tommy tried to pass off as reason enough to justify his fears. He also realized that he loves Tommy – more than he’s ever loved anyone, more than he thought was possible to love someone but maybe always secretly hoped was in his future, even when that dark voice in his head tried to convince him no one would ever love him as much. 

But Tommy does. Tommy loves him so much the thought of Buck breaking up with him scared him into ending things before he could get his own heart broken. But what he feels for Tommy isn’t some kind of puppy love or something he’ll grow out of or get bored of; it’s real, and Tommy thinking he’s not enough, that he’s not forever-kind-of-love material doesn’t dissuade Buck any; he’s intimately familiar with issues of self worth.

Whatever insecurities Tommy has about being someone’s last love doesn’t apply to Buck. “You’re enough, for me. You’re everything, actually. Everything I ever wanted and more I didn’t know I could want.” 

A heavy moment passes between them where Buck sees his words sink in. They seem to weigh Tommy down, even more. 

He wants so badly to reach out, to speak the words into his mouth, press them into his skin until Tommy can’t deny how real they are because he’ll feel them with every breath, every movement.

“I don’t want to lose you,” Tommy admits, voice soft and more vulnerable than Buck’s ever heard it. “I can’t lose you, Evan. If you ask me to try, and then–” he cuts himself off, shakes the thought away, tries to barricade himself back behind his armor. 

Maybe Buck can’t fully understand Tommy’s fear because he hasn’t experienced what he has, but he knows what it’s like to try and fail, to love and be left. But the two of them are on the same page this time – for everything that matters – not reading from separate books like Buck and all of his exes. “Did I ever tell you about Thomas and Mitchell?” 

“Um, no. I don’t think so. Friends of yours?” Buck can see Tommy’s still raw, still hiding, but he goes along with it, gives him the opening, like he’s always done.

“No, they uh.” Buck swallows, the memory still affects him even all these years later. “They were an elderly gay couple I met on a call a few years back. Well, I met Thomas. Sat with him after he watched his husband die.” 

Tommy tries to look unimpressed with having to listen to a sad story – he’s more of a romcom guy; lighthearted storylines and happy endings, Buck knows – but his face crumples a bit in sympathy. 

“He said, Mitchell was his heart, and that they wanted to go together. I could see how heartbroken he was, and the thought of loving someone like that and then losing them? I couldn’t imagine what that must be like.” 

Tommy doesn’t say it but Buck can almost hear his gently snarky tone: we’re not dead, Evan. He can see the words held back behind the purse of Tommy’s lips. 

“I told him I hoped to find a love like that some day. And he told me something I’ve carried with me ever since.” Tommy searches his face, and Buck feels the truth of Old Thomas’ words in this moment. “He said: you don’t find it, you make it.” 

Tommy blinks. “Are you saying you want to grow old with me?”

Buck can’t help his smile; it’s the first real one he’s had because of Tommy all week– one not tinged in pain and regret. There’s the Tommy he knows and loves. “I’m saying, I want to make it with you. Because these past six months have been the best of my life, Tommy. And I realized it’s because I found you– my person– and I want to make a future with you.” 

And there’s that tentative smile – the same one Tommy wore on their makeup coffee date all those months ago when he gave Buck a second chance. 

They deserve a second chance, now. They deserve to try. 

“I can’t move in with you,” Tommy settles on, and it sounds like a but, like: I can’t move in with you, but I want to be with you. 

Buck shakes his head before Tommy even finishes. “That’s okay, we don’t have to live together.” He knows the unspoken yet doesn’t go unnoticed for the way Tommy’s narrowed eyes assess him. There’s no use hiding it. “I do want to live with you, some day. I want to build a life with you. But, we can take it slow.”

“I don’t think ‘slow’ is in your repertoire.” It’s a joke. Tommy’s smile is less fragile, his armor lowered. 

Buck smiles again, hopeful; Tommy’s coming out of hiding. 

He reaches out, fingertips grazing Tommy’s, his movements unhurried. Tommy lets him tangle their fingers together. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Tommy says, “Okay.” 

Buck’s falling, diving, soaring. And he’s not alone. “Would a kiss be out of the question right now?” 

That crinkly smile that Buck loves so much finally makes its return, creasing around Tommy’s eyes like rays of sunshine. He didn’t realize just how much he missed the sight of Tommy’s joy until he’s faced with it head on, bright and gorgeous. He feels nourished in its presence, especially knowing he’s the cause of it. He thinks it’s okay to be a little proud of that. 

Tommy kisses him. Oh– this.. he’s missed this: the press of Tommy’s lips on his, his stubble scraping against Buck’s skin– catching on Buck’s own scruff. He slides a hand up Tommy’s chest, feeling the warm, toned bulk of him. Hooks his fingers around Tommy’s neck to pull him in more, bring their bodies flush, slip his tongue into Tommy’s mouth and get a proper taste of him.

One of Tommy’s large hands fits tentatively to Buck’s hip, one last show of hesitance. Buck disentangles their fingers and covers both of Tommy’s hands, moving them to rest heavier, grip him firmly, with no room for uncertainty.

“No more running away,” Buck murmurs, nose brushing alongside Tommy’s. He feels more than sees Tommy shake his head.

“No more running,” he agrees, following with another lingering kiss that’s begging to be deepened.

Buck breaks it to add: “We’re in this together.” 

Tommy nods. “I’m with you.”

It’s not how he thought their first love confessions would go, but they’ll be stronger for it, he knows that much. And he knows Tommy loves him. And Tommy knows Buck loves him in return. And that’s a pretty good starting place for a second chance. 

[capseycartwright]

every moment of season eight for me is just confirming that buck fell first but eddie fell harder. like. buck has known for longer how he feels (even if it was subconsciously) but he’s learned how to live with it and it’s a box he’s not actively trying to open but eddie is only Just realising and he can’t pack his feels for buck away. they’re just spilling out now and there’s nothing he can do to contain them.

[blorbodiaz]

enough with all the who fell first who fell harder shit. buck fell too early and eddie fell too late…isn’t that the most tragic thing you’ve ever heard.

[ruewrote]

𝑢𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑.

PAIRING: evan buckley x fem!reader WARNINGS: blood, reader getting injured GENRE: angst, fluff SONG INSPIRATION: departure by jaron WORD COUNT: 1.1k

navigation | ask | evan buckley masterlist

you had just finished shutting the doors of the ambulance, giving it two loud bangs for them to drive before re-joining the crew.

"another great save guys, good job!" bobby says as he pats eddie on the back, walking over to ready the engine.

"god im hungry!" he blurted out and you just laugh, "what?"

"i just seriously don't understand how you're hungry after all of that," if anything you felt incredibly nauseous.

that's when you felt the sharp hot pain in your side, suddenly finding it hard to stand, it had become apparent that your adrenaline had worn off.

falling to your knees as you cried out in agony. your hands pressed to the hurt area, pulling it back to find your hand soaked in your own blood.

buck worriedly rushed to your side, his hands gently pushed your shoulders back so you laid out flat on the ground. only to find the cause of your discomfort was a large piece of glass was sticking out of your stomach through your jacket.

his first thought was to curse you as you had recklessly climbed through the windshield when you helped the young woman out of the recent car wreck, only for her to be okay and for you to get injured yourself.

he rummaged through his medical bag for something to stop the bleeding, struggling but finally found the right supplies. using his teeth to rip open the packaging before putting pressure around the glass making you groan out in pain.

"i know, i know sweetheart. you're gonna be okay." no words left you just sharp little breaths as you lightly gripped onto bucks arm, trying to give him some sort of reassurance.

he screamed out for the rest of the team, voice breaking as tears streamed down his face. the glass was deep like really deep, all evan could think about was you and if anything had been nicked internally.

bobby and eddie ran over to the two of you, you could hear one of them call for another ambulance as soon as possible. something about a firefighter down, but all you could focus on was how cold you had gotten.

"buck i don't feel s-so goo-d..." for the first time in a long time you were afraid.

"they're on their way, you gotta hold on for me, please!" he begged as he smoothed the hair that had fallen across your face with his spare shaking hand, the other still tightly pressed against your wound.

shakily you lifted your hand to brush his tears, your thumb very slowly caressing his cheek. "you'll be oka.."

the pain was all too much, it was too difficult to keep your eyes open. evan shook your face, "no. no you've got to stay awake! i can't lose you." he shouted, as eddie pulled him away from you. the paramedics put you on the gurney rushing you into the back of the vehicle immediately hooking you up to multiple medications.

bobby and buck shared a look, the captain gave him a swift nod, that's all it took for him to jump into the seat next to you. grabbing a hold of your hand, squeezing it tightly in his own as you made your way to the hospital.

beep. beep. beep.

your vision was blurred as you opened your eyes, first seeing the heart monitor and the dark sky that peaked out from behind the wonky blinds. the hospital was quiet, a little too quiet for your liking.

you turned to your other side, finding a sleeping evan in what looked like the most uncomfortable chair with a blanket wrapped around his body.

a smile tugged at your lips, he stayed with you. your smile soon fell realising the last thing he saw of you conscious was you nearly bleeding out in his arms.

readjusting yourself was harder than you thought, grunting at the pain, holding your side.

buck woke up startled, jumping up to help you lay back down.

"that was one way to get your attention," you laugh before wincing.

"you've got to be careful, that glass got you good." he says as he straightened out your blanket.

he was trying to not show his worry, you had known him far too long to see through that. "buck, buckley!" you whisper yelled, grabbing his hand, pulling him close to you the best that you could.

everything fell still. his bigger hand intertwined with yours.

"i was so worried," his voice wobbled, it was only loud enough for you to hear.

"i should've stopped you, if i did you wouldn't be here right now."

you squeezed his hand, looking up at him. "you know you couldn't have stopped this, ev."

tugging on his hand to bring him closer to you, shuffling over in your bed, patting the small amount of space next to you. "hop in?" you questioned with a smile.

"there's no way there is enough room on that thing for the both of us!" he exclaimed

"well you better squeeze in then."

and so he did, your bodies pressed up against one another. only after buck extensively checked that he wasn't hurting you or laying on any tubes.

you were now both settled face-to-face, hearing nothing but each others breaths and the beating of your machine. your heart rate elevated when he leaned in closer to run his fingers through your hair.

feeling your face heat up, closing your eyes, embarrassed how a simple action could do that to you, let alone him being able to hear it. the sound of him chuckling worried you. but the feeling of him going back to gently brushing the stray hairs out of your face comforted you.

"i know we deal with close calls every single day, but i... god. all i could think about when they took you away was all the things i hadn't told you yet."

your eyebrows furrowed and eyes reopened, "what things?"

"uh, well things like 'i love you' and also to let you know that 'you stink'," he laughed as you playfully punched him in the arm.

"hey, ow!"

"took you long enough." you exaggeratedly sighed whilst trying to keep a straight face.

"you knew?!" he exclaimed as he sat up still looking for answers.

laughing at his reaction as you held your bandage, "no, you c'mere!"

he scooped you up in his arms, your arms wrapping around his shoulders, laughter now gone. he leaned in close, his lips brushed softly against yours. smiling into the kiss you pulled him closer to you.

you stayed like that for a while, cuddling, kissing and talking. that soon came to a stop when you fell asleep listening to evan's voice, he only realised this mid ramble. pulling the covers up over you, closing his eyes, slowly wrapping his arms around you. not before giving you a kiss on the forehead of course.

© ruewrote.

[dinogoose]

i’m a believer in buck falling first but eddie falling harder. i think buck started falling for eddie while shannon was still alive, and obviously, eddie at that time wasn't looking (nor was he ready to after shannon died) but once he did, he fell harder because that’s how he loves.

[loullaby]

i posted my donations for @alliwantforchristmasislou earlier, but i wanted to make a separate post about how much bucktommy changed my life this year.

before i tell my personal sob story, i just wanna thank all my bucktommy friends for making me smile again. to my 20 tommy fans and my lou fuckers, you really did save me 💜

@shannondiazs @half-oz-eddie @theweewooshow @louisjude @xofemeraldstars

@disaster-j @reginamillls @wikiangela

@tommykinard @aringofsalt @apartmentsmoke

@kiinard @ohithankyou @shaunashipman

@tommykinard217 @louvemeanyway @loucifersbitch

@kinardevans @louferrignojrofficial @teenmaximoff

and to all the people that support my silly little posts and icons, thank you, i appreciate you so much!

i started watching 911 in 2020, but i never really connected with the fandom. I always felt like I got to it too late, and everyone already had their friend groups, so I just watched the episodes and read fics on my own.

at the end of 2022, i moved to portugal, because my mom got a brain tumor and she was living there, and my husband got accepted to a doctorate program there, so it made sense for us to move. after we moved, my mom lost her pension because of the stupid brazilian government, and my husband wouldn't get his scholarship approved because of the stupid portuguese government, so i had to financially support everyone. that made me work 3 times as hard, which led me to a terrible burnout and depression, but i couldn't stop working or we wouldn't have any money.

i kept going kinda like a zombie, just working, sometimes eating, sometimes sleeping, nothing sparked joy anymore. until april 4th 2024, when bucktommy kissed for the first time. i was still watching 911 through all of this, but i wasn't checking tumblr anymore, but that was such a shock that i had to see what everyone was talking about.

and what i found was a bunch of people that were just as happy as i was to see buck be happy. as we got to know tommy, we fell so deep and so hard for him. and we fell even deeper and harder for lou. we joke that someone put drugs on that man, but his big heart and big tits bewitched us, body and soul.

i found my people, i found a reason to smile again. i was inspired to create for the fandom, something i hadn't done in over 15 years. seeing such a loving relationship and a positive queer representation gave us all hope, and that's why the breakup hurt so much.

let's hope that 2025 brings them back to us, and if it doesn't, we'll always have each other 💜

[pikapitou]

buckeddie 🕸️!!!

yayyyyyyy I love when characters are TRAPPED together !!!

They're probably not going to die. 70/30. Maybe 60/40 if they get unlucky and the debris pile shifts, but there's nothing they can do about that. Neither of them got hurt, Eddie says oxygen shouldn't be a problem, and two floors above them is a whole crowd of first responders looking at the blinking lights of their transponders on a screen right now. Their chances are really, really good. 

Buck's not gonna be the one to say that, though. 

He shifts closer so he can brace himself over Eddie on his elbows. It's cramped in their little safe pocket, but there's enough room to roll off him if he wanted to. He doesn't. Eddie doesn't say anything; his big hands are still at Buck's waist, under the turn-out coat, where they fell to steady him when the structure groaned and Buck knocked them both to the ground. It’s hard to see each other; their headlamps cast strange shadows from where they're discarded next to their busted radios—when they radioed for help nothing happened but their voices echoing back to them, like he and Eddie are the last two people in the world.

"Eddie," Buck starts, voice low and raspy so the words only fall between the two of them, "This is... bad, right? What—what if we don't..." 

He can feel the give of Eddie's exhale underneath him, the hot rush of it against his face. They're both breathing way too fast for all the concrete dust in the air, but Buck thinks the danger is probably halved if they're sharing it.

"Buck, listen. We're not there yet, alright?" Eddie says steadily, or trying to be. There's a breathless quality to his voice that Buck wants to bottle up like a firefly. 

"Yeah, but," Buck trails off, then deliberately drops more of his weight onto Eddie so he can feel the way he doesn't even flinch until their foreheads brush. "We... we have to be realistic, right?" 

He counts the seconds as Eddie stays silent underneath him. Precious seconds, Buck knows in the back of his mind, and doesn't think harder about why.

Then Eddie's hands at his waist squeeze, once, then slowly, like they're barely even moving, splay out over Buck’s ribs, big and warm and solid. Buck takes an inhale and holds it, so he can feel his chest expand under Eddie’s touch. "Yeah," Eddie says, practically voiceless, into the space between their mouths. "We—should be. Realistic." 

The radio crackles—out of range, not busted—with Gerrard's stupid fucking voice, "Firefighter Diaz. Buckley. Do you copy?" 

Eddie doesn't do anything like spring apart, but he does let go as he reaches for the radio and responds, the loss of contact like pressure taken off a wound. Buck has to sit up and grit his teeth against the blinding urge to—what? Smash the fucking radio? Find a piece of rebar to start bleeding out on? He doesn't get to do any of that, because they're starting excavation efforts now, and Gerrard is signing off with a condescending don't do anything stupid down there, and then it's just them again, staring at each other with the real world right there with them. Buck is still panting, can't get enough air, but underneath him Eddie's breathing is slow, even, and steady. 

"Looks like we're gonna be okay," Eddie says. Smiles. And doesn't touch him again. 

[cherryc1nnam0n]

A rose for you | Modern!Eddie Munson x AFAB!Reader

Summary: Eddie wants to play with your new rose toy

Cw: Porn with little plot, use of toys, unprotected PIV, dirty talk, creampie

The idea had come from Eddie's deepest thoughts of perversion with you

When he knew you had ordered the infamous rose toy he knew he needed to use it on you as soon as you got it

But what you didn't expect was for him to be the one to use it first, and by that I mean literally using it himself

You were bouncing on his cock as he had the long part of the toy that moved inside his ass and the rose itself against his asshole as you kept riding him

"Fuck baby, it's licking my ass so good" he kept saying as he bucked his hips up to meet you down

"Can't wait to use it myself" you said needy to feel it inside you, kind of jealous of Eddie's pleasure

"Soon baby, you'll know how good it feels"

The vibrations in his ass were too much and he was nearing his end "Fuck baby I'm cumming, I'm fucking cumming!" He fucked you harder as he shot his load into you "Fuuuuck yes yes fuck yes!"

You got off him and saw the beauty he was, chest and cheeks flushed, sweaty bangs stuck to his forehead and his ass gaping around the toy

"Feel good?"

"Hell yeah, your turn" he said out of breath bit determined to make you feel good too

Now with your legs wide open he was licking your pussy while the rise licked your clit, he kept fucking his fingers into you while the rose did it's job at your nub

"Like that baby? Feels good?"

"Mhm yes Eddie, fuck"

"Let the toy fuck you baby" he said grabbing the other part of the toy, sticking it inside your needy pussy "Let's turn it on baby" he pressed the button and the toy started to fuck you

"Oh fuck Eddie!" You moaned, it felt so good and he was holding the rose to your clit which made it even better "Oh fuck yes!" You shut your eyes, feeling tears filling them from the overwhelming pleasure

"Yeah feels good baby? Is it fucking you good babe? Yeah?" He started kissing from your belly up your tits, were he took one into his mouth, sucking it like a newborn as he held the rose to your clit, making you moan even louder

"Fuck Eddie I'm gonna cum, fuck gonna cum!" You hollered as you felt your legs tense and shake as you finally had the best orgasm ever, the toy pushing Eddie's cum deeper into you "Fuck fuck shit aah!"

"There we go, good girl baby, good girl, cum all over the toy baby, yes"

Your vision was blurry, the rose still going at it on your clit

"Fuck that was hot, I love this thing" he said to the rose

You just fell down on the bed, he was always so silly

[lover-of-mine]

It's kinda like you have Buck having these intense feelings at first impression, still being hung up on Abby and the idea be has of what loves is supposed to look like, taking that once he got to know Eddie a bit better, deciding is admiration, putting in the best friend box and never looking at it again and then you have Eddie who was guarded at first because of the complications with Shannon but slowly but surely walking a road that only ends with him in love with Buck starting back as early as the situation with Carla but having too much shit to deal with before allowing himself to consider doing something about it. Leaving them is this very cool chronic bad timing situation.

And I think that applying the chronic bad timing as a trope to them works so well when you consider the way their love lives move parallel to each other in show. They are parallel but they never line up. Hence we have chronic bad timing.

While I do think Buck had a crush on Eddie when they first met, I still stand by Eddie fell first because there's a difference between having a crush on your hot coworker and ignoring that because he grew to be the best friend you ever had and realizing you're in love with your best friend.

[poughkeepsies]

"Fell first, fell harder" doesn't actually work with buddie cause they're both the most embarrassing U-Haul lesbians - Buck fell with "you're a badass under pressure" and 0.2 seconds later Eddie fell with "or, you know, you could have mine" and then they both cannonballed into the deep end when Buck drove Eddie to get Christopher after the earthquake