#Bro I swear I'm so unhinged.

[katzline]

The screen recording explains pretty much everything...

Im really unhinged

[svtskneecaps]

friends and fiends if this truly spells the Over for the qsmp i may let the brainworms that have been festering in me for MONTHS--A YEAR, EVEN--win.

i may summarize the goddamn fucking lore.

[taasgirl]

blame - driver!reader x grid

summary: driver!reader goes to war protecting her teammate and best friend, max verstappen.

a/n: this is NOT a romance smau!!

liked by user76, user98, and 6, 872, 014 others f1 Following a breach of conditions set by the FIA, Max Verstappen will serve a mandatory community service period.

tagged: maxverstappen1

ynusername just say ya'll can't handle him and move on!!!

user27 be careful y/n, they'll send you too user46 HAHA SHE'S SO REAL

user51 this is so stupid

user90 who decided this???

user75 Okay I understand him getting community service for the Ocon incident, but for swearing?

user21 they're treating max like he's a child

liked by oscarpiastri, redbullracing, and 2, 379, 918 others ynusername unbothered, moisturised, and definitely plotting to overthrow the fia!

tagged: maxverstappen1

user59 My dreams 5 minutes before my alarm:

user61 y/n and max are never beating the platonic soulmates allegations

user87 Get yourself a teammate that fights the FIA on your behalf @/estebanocon

maxverstappen1 I was going to say something nice then I saw the last photo.

ynusername pls still compliment me x

oscarpiastri I agree with the caption

landonorris ur too ashy to be moisturised

view ynusername's story...

caption only the FIA could ruin a beautiful flight @/alex_albon

liked by carlossainz55, alex_albon, and 1, 256, 280 others ynusername me and bro suiting up to destroy the FIA

tagged: carlossainz55, landonorris

lewishamilton This is why you're my favourite on the grid

ynusername this is why you're the 🐐

oscarpiastri Hey I hope you were joking when you said you'd be turning into a grid terror haha (please be joking)

ynusername don't worry ur safe xx

landonorris WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS Y/N???

landonorris If me and my gang pull up ahh post

ynusername yup you're now my number one target for unironically using 'ahh'

maxverstappen1 I hope I am bro

ynusername there's no one i'd rather serve community service with

liked by fernandoalo_oficial, lewishamilton, and 3, 287, 3389 others ynusername don't worry I won't actually replicate crashgate. however, please know that I have free reign over my radio xx

landonorris Thank god u had me scared for a minute

user49 y/n is taking this too far 😭

ynusername oh i can go further if needed

lewishamilton HAHA this is gold y/n

ynusername when I have the praise of sir lewis hamilton then I know that I'm doing something right

user20 OMG Y/N GOING INSANE ON RADIO IS A NEEEED

user91 y/n is the only reason i'm tuning in this weekend

view ynusername's story...

caption: I have some business to attend to this sunday afternoon

liked by user62, user87, and 209, 557 others f1updates Not shy on the radio so far! Y/N on the formation lap, and she'd already quizzing her engineer.

user83 she's so unserious i love her

user90 This is my sign to strictly watch her onboard today

user41 y/n really is going to put on a show huh

liked by user 34, user75, and 1, 722, 981 others f1updates A few of the unhinged thing's Y/N was saying during today's race. Safe to say that she may be sporting a ban for the next race.

user38 her engineer replying with 'affirm' is so fucking funny to me

user92 And ya'll still wonder why she's my fave driver

user47 THE WAY THIS ISN'T EVEN EVERYTHING SHE SAID

user28 what else did she say??

user47 @/user28 she went on a whole tangent about how stroll is a prick that shouldn't be in f1 😭😭

liked by charlesleclerc, landonorris, and 3, 615, 248 others ynusername FIA knew I'd be too powerful for another race (hey at least bestie doesn't have to do community service).

maxverstappen1 You're insane I love you

ynusername dinner is still on you right?

landonorris NOOOOOO RIP Y/N

ynusername bitch i'm still alive

oscarpiastri Welcome back Kevin Magnussen liked by ynusername

redbullracing She might be crazy, but she's our kind of crazy!

ynusername pls keep me employed ya'll

view landonorris's story...

caption Yes, she still has the helmet on

view maxverstappen1's story...

caption Okay time for us to get to work

eeee i hope you guys liked this, please let me know if you did!

[hanniebaeee]

Clueless: Wrong Chat?

Hyunjin x fem!reader

Warnings: None!

Genre: Best friends to lovers, flufffff, texts

Summary: Hyunjin, your best friend, drops you off for a coffee date with your colleague Mingyu. It's not a date at all, but Hyunjin thinks it is. And he rants in the wrong group chat - completely jealous and unhinged.

a/n: Wanted to make a Clueless series! Thoughts?

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Hyunjin sighs dramatically as he flops onto the couch in his apartment. He's been pouting ever since he'd dropped you at the cafe where you're meeting Mingyu, your colleague for coffee.

Hyunjin: I’m actually losing my goddamn mind.

Hyunjin: She’s out with him. With. Him.

Felix: Hyunjin, it's just coffee.

Hyunjin: OF COURSE IT'S NOT JUST COFFEE, FELIX.

Chan: Oh no🙄

Minho: Here we go. Someone hold his leash.

Hyunjin: This is NOT good. Mingyu is - he’s like…

Jeongin: Are you okay bro?

Hyunjin: I AM NOT OKAY.

How is he supposed to be ok when you, the love of his life is out with some guy for "coffee"? Jisung had taken a girl out for coffee a few weeks ago, and now she's his girlfriend.

Hyunjin sighs. He couldn't think of you being anybody else's. You're his girl. And he's gonna win you over.

Meanwhile, you are sitting across from Mingyu, discreetly checking your phone as it buzzes repeatedly with notifications. You freeze when you see the texts. 

Oh, so this is why Hyunjin was in a bad mood the whole morning, you think. He barely said a word to you as he drove you to the cafe. 

Changbin: Dude, calm down. It’s just coffee.

Hyunjin: COFFEE LEADS TO DINNER, DINNER LEADS TO NETFLIX, AND NETFLIX LEADS TO YOU KNOW WHAT. ASK JISUNG.

Jisung: HYUNJIN.

Felix: 😳

Minho: Jisung you sly dog.

Chan: Hyunjin, touch some grass.

Hyunjin: I CAN’T, CHRISTOPHER. SHE IS MY GRASS.

Minho: Let it all out. Keep going.

Chan: Hyunjin. Deep breaths. IN through your nose, OUT through your mouth. 

Hyunjin: I SWEAR TO GOD IF HE LAYS A FINGER ON HER

Changbin: I don't think he's laying anything on her. 

Felix: Okay, Hyun, you need a time-out.

Hyunjin: No, what I NEED is for Mingyu to trip over his stupid perfect legs and fall face-first into a compost bin.

Mingyu smiles at you across the table, gesturing towards his laptop as he speaks. You are trying so hard to focus on the ideas he's laying down in front of you - the startup ideas that you two have been talking about forever. You smile back, nodding, while trying not to choke on your laughter.

Jisung: Stupid perfect legs? Hyunjin, why do you even know what Mingyu’s legs look like?

Hyunjin: Because I have eyes, Ji. I pay attention to the threat level.

Hyunjin: He's like 6 feet tall.

Jeongin: Threat level: Sexy. 

Hyunjin: THANK YOU, JEONGIN. No one asked you.

Chan: You're tall enough

Hyunjin: Not enough apparently

Felix: Hyunjin, calm down.

Hyunjin: No, because LISTEN. Who does he even think he is. Asking my girl out. How dare he. 

Hyunjin: SHE’S OUT THERE WITH HIM WHILE I’M JUST

Changbin: Lonely and deranged?

Hyunjin: EXACTLY.

Seungmin: Someone hose him down 

You are trying to concentrate on the graph Mingyu is pointing to now, but seriously, who are you even kidding. Your cheeks are warming up with the second-hand embarrassment from what's brewing on the group chat.

Hyunjin: And do you know what really sucks? She’s probably looking AMAZING right now. Like, how does she do that? How does she leave the house and make everyone fall in love with her?!

Hyunjin: And doesn't even realize that I love her? She obviously doesn't! Like I'm right here.

Jisung: Why don't you just corner her in the supply closet?? Omg I never thought I'd get a chance to give that back to you 🔪

Hyunjin: Bro. She's my best friend. It isn't the same.

Jisung: Excuses excuses

Felix: Oh SHIT. 

Felix: 🚨 STOP 🚨

Jeongin: Wait, what chat is this 👀

Hyunjin: What do you mean what chat?

---

Hyunjin goes quiet for a second.

---

Hyunjin: Wait.

Hyunjin: WHAT CHAT IS THIS???

Chan: You absolute clown.

Felix: I tried. 

Minho: LMAO

You: Hyunjin.

Hyunjin: Y/N. Baby. Light of my life.

Y/N: Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re picking me up in 20 minutes. And we're gonna talk.

Hyunjin: Ok. Yes. Ok.

---

Hyunjin was still typing and you were about done with this. 

---

Y/N: Baby. Stop typing. 

Hyunjin: Shutting up now.

Changbin: She really did put a leash on him.

Felix: This is why I love her 😁

Y/N: And Hyunjin?

Hyunjin: Yes, angel?

Y/N: I love you too. 

Hyunjin: 😳😳😳😳

Hyunjin’s heart literally stops when he reads your text. You love him back. You love him back!!! He feels faint, his hands are shaky and he just needs to see you. Right now. 

Hyunjin: Picking you up now.

Y/N: Ok baby.

---

And finally, it was all calm again.

---

Chan: Well, at least we get a little peace and quiet now.

---

As you step outside, you spotted Hyunjin’s car pulling up, his face twisted in a mix of nervousness  and relief. His gaze immediately locks onto Mingyu, who waves goodbye. Hyunjin behaves just so that he can show you that he can be a good boy when he needs to.

You grin as you get into the car, and pull on the seat belt. When you look up at him, he's watching you eagerly, well he does look a little scared - like a child waiting to be scolded for doing something wrong.

“You ok, Jinnie?” You ask.

“Perfect. I'm perfect.”

You raise an eyebrow, fully aware of the effect you have on him.

“Is that so?” you purr, and Hyunjin gulps, as he nods.

“Yeah,” he mumbles, looking away. 

“You know,” you said with a sly smile, “if you had said something sooner, we wouldn’t have had to go through all this.”

Hyunjin’s face turns a sweet pink, and he can't help but smile a little.

“Can you say it again?” He asks. 

“Say what?”

“That you love me?”

You feel your own cheeks heating up as you your eyes meet. 

“I love you, Hyunjinnie. I have for as long as I can remember.” You whisper, and Hyunjin's head falls onto the steering wheel as he does his best not to scream out in joy. 

You giggle at his reaction and he looks at you again.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks shyly. 

“Yes please,” You say and that's that.

---

Hyunjin: Guess what, losers?

Hyunjin: WE KISSED.

Chan: Wow. Congratulations?

Minho: Was it a pity kiss? Be honest.

Changbin: I'm sure she did it to shut you up.

Hyunjin: It was magical.

Hyunjin: She looked at me, leaned in, and BAM. Fireworks.

Hyunjin: It’s what poets write about.

Jeongin: Or she just felt bad for you.

Hyunjin: NO.

Felix: Seriously, if you keep this up, she’s gonna see this and run the other way.

Hyunjin: She won't!

Y/N: Hyunjin.

Y/N: GET OFF YOUR PHONE.

Hyunjin: Ok bye.

Chan: Jokes aside, we're happy for you both.

Jisung: Of course we are

Minho: Y/N, sweetheart, get your man a collar

Y/N: Noted.

Divider by @saradika-graphics

Tags: @moonchild9350 @velvetmoonlght @eastjonowhere @pixie-felix @sailor--sun

[f14fun]

pixelated love (!simmer x mv1) - chapter 4

synopsis: in which the famous three time world champion max verstappen wants to learn how to play the sims 4. except, he doesn't really know how to. so what does he do, search up a youtube tutorial. low-and-behold, y/n's video is the first he watches.

smau ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆ prev | next | series index ˚୨୧⋆｡

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 162,823 others

yourusername: AYEEEE wedding day in mc! not the type of content that i usually make but here i am getting married to maxie poo in mc! plz pu 😈💐👰🏻‍♀️

view comments:

user1: rip all ppl who actual believed that this is an ACTUAL wedding LMAO. the biggest joke that she's ever made she is actually executing 🤣🤣🤣

maxverstsappen1: What are you talking about?

maxverstappen1: This IS a real wedding??

maxverstappen1: Huh? I am lost.

user2: out of EVERYONE playing into the joke i didn't expect max to go full on roleplaying mode 💀

maxverstsappen1: I am not roleplaying ❌🤷🏻‍♂️

user3: BYE HE IS SO UNSERIOUSSS 😭😭

yourusername: CANNOT WAIT TO FINALLY MAKE BOO MY BOOOOOOOO

maxverstappen1: 😘😘

user4: aight y/n the jig is up you can STOP COMMENTING FROM UNDER MAX'S ACCOUNT 😀

yourusername: what are you talking about... 🫠😞🔐

landonorris: I am still baffled how you got this man to do so many things, oml...

yourusername: he luv luv luvsss me cuz of my beautiful smile and amazing smexy humor 🥰😌😇🤭🤭🤭

maxverstappen: Oh, okay! Believe what you want!

user5: HE ATE HER UP I FEAR LMFAO

user6: DAMN SAVAGE MAX 😭😭😭

user7: bro im so glad we r getting unhinged max bc of y/n omgghhh 👺👺🤡

user8: BYE i need to see max in full wedding smexy smexy smexy attire UGH pls y/n i beg of u to PLS make him show up in a tux on streammmm 😇🙏🏻👼🏻🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

yourusername: 🤭🤫

maxverstappen: 😐

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taglist: @hiireadstuff @sinofwriting @mehrmonga @the-untamed-soul @glai1023-blog @loloekie @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @sheastri @llando4norris @gwginnyweasley @carmenita122 @ririyulife @pausmoon @ur-fav-ave @eveninggstar @maddie-naps @erin-odonnell04 @rexit-mo @ems-alexandra @si1ver06 @iamred-iamyellow @bibissparkles @percypie @formula1blog @lanadelray1989 @rylieverstappen-sargent @luvsforme @eiaaasamantha @kaysmiles42 @mvaldez7821 @stinkyjax @sweate-r-weathe-r @laneyspaulding19 @mingyusbigrighttoe

some of these didn't get tagged, and i'm having trouble (?) it's being very weird, idk, so please let me know if your name is here and it didn't tag you ❣️

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author's note: ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾

lmao i lied again, part FIVE i swear will actually include the mc wedding, and for al of y'all's confused, ITS FAKE LMAO they are not actually getting married for reals, just for funsies (shout out to my moots for letting me know this bit was a tad confusing 😭)

i'll see if i can get part five out tmr afternoon or evening!

comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

[six-eyed-samurai]

SUMMARY: Rindou loves you and all but...you really aren't supposed to be spamming his phone during a meeting right now.... A/N: This is absolute crack, based off a recent convo and dedicated to my unhinged moot @plebbypebblepleb WARNINGS: Sanzu on drugs and swearing

>>look at this cat I found

>>he's so cute!!!!!!

>>IM GONNA DIE FROM CUTENESS can we pls pls adopt him???

>>never mind

>>HE BIT ME

Rindou felt his eye twitch. He discreetly swiped away the notifications on his pinging phone away under the table. Thankfully no one had noticed yet, although Ran was grinning slyly at him he always was.

Twenty messages.

Barely ten minutes had even gone by in the meeting.

Luckily he had turned off volume for his phone. Mikey wouldn't be too happy to have his Bonten meeting so frequently interrupted so unprofessionally. Rindou didn't have much interest in being laughed at or questioned by the others either.

>>riiiiiiin

>>I was watching some videos

>>would you become a 100 foot boa constructor who eats British children boiled and gets skinned to be used as socks or boots for a Russian lady I consumed three centuries ago (she tasted like coconut)

I'm in a meeting<<

And no???<<

Rindou continued to nod at Mikey's words, doing his utmost best to divide his attention between his rapidly typing fingers and his boss while Ran ducked his head under the table curiously and came up with a wink and a very obvious smirk. Koko eyes them both suspiciously.

He was used to this. Absolutely. One thing that came with dating you was that you had a tendency to spam his phone with updates of what you were doing, odd things you had seen, the most creative of questions and pictures bordering on unhinged.

He wouldn't change it for anything, of that Rindou was certain. He loved you to Pluto and back and in an every day fight he'd take your side over Ran (even despite the elder Haitani’s “miserable” theatrics of supposed betrayal). The texts livened up the dreary work of being part of the number one most wanted criminal gang.

But…

>>I'M NOT FINISHED

>>or drink fruit juice that will give you the seven most deadly diseases

Both are terrible<<

>>[image attached]

WTF<<

>>Like it?? <33

I don't want close up pics of your feet<<

>>how dare you

…it was quite the inconvenience when he was supposed to be working.

Like right now.

Rindou reached up and rubbed his temples. Mikey was getting to the important part and he was really struggling to concentrate. It wasn't like you didn't know he was busy. He had specifically mentioned it today. Rindou couldn't fault you either - this was just your love language and…this was probably revenge for him misplacing your favourite shirt.

He briefly considered ignoring your texts for now, until he could answer them later. But then it'd probably spiral to a 100+ and the vibrations were really starting to get to him. And he did once promise to never ignore anything you said after you apologized for talking too much. You might even call him.

Ugh. What a conundrum.

Ran’s smile widened and a new notification sprang up on Rindou’s phone.

>>Ah ah ah lil bro

>>texting your gf in a meeting?

>>you're very obvious about it

>>I'm sure Mikey will notice soon~~

Great. Two idiots were spamming up his phone now. Couldn't he ever catch a break? He caught Kakucho’s frown at him and adjusted his poker face again.

Shut up<<

You're on your phone too<<

>>I'm just warning you~~

Rindou exhaled sharply and kicked his brother under the table. Childish, but Ran was a child and he deserved it.

>>Rin???

>>guess what!!

>>my fav singer just dropped a new album!!

>>can we buy it later

>>pleaseeeeee

“Haitani Shithead! What are you doing under the table?”

Crap, Sanzu caught him. Rindou shrugged, leaning away from his side-eyeing neighbor. “Nothing, just need to arrange some things on my phone for some debts to be collected,” He lies casually.

The pinkhead is probably too high to realize the holes in the fib. Thankfully he lets it go with another pop of a pill. “Sure, don’t gotta be so secretive.”

“Also, don’t call me Shithead.”

>>[3 images attached]

>>chat wake up what is going on in my friends gc rn

Yes, Rindou wanted to scream, he absolutely had to be secretive…with the cursed pictures you had just sent him. Thirty unread messages already and the meeting wasn’t even ending yet! God, Ran wasn’t helping either - he too was now spamming Rindou’s chat.

>>rindou and (y/n)

>>sitting in a tree

>>k

>>i

>>s

You know what, he could make his excuses later. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Rindou massaged his temples again, sighed deeply and looked down on his phone.

He blocked the both of you.

***

Of course it came back to bite his ass when he went home later that night: having taken extreme offense to the block you had promptly banished Rindou out of your once shared bedroom and he was exiled to the couch.

Which was being hogged by Ran who claimed he was there first for his sixth nap of the day.

Maybe next time he should just “lose” his phone before a meeting.

[imnameimswrld]

ⵌ ׄ ۪ 𝐀 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐒𝐄 ⁰⁰ ׄ ⑅ KSW ‌˖ ֺ ᰮ

— DESCRIPTION ੭ in which sunwoo is everywhere in all the paddocks except for his girlfriend's.

— PAIRING ੭ kim sunwoo x vca!redbull!driver.

— FILE ੭ social media au.

— WARNINGS ੭ language, kinds unhinged tbz but what's new ? (pun very much intended)

— SERIES ੭ "WAIT...THEY MAKE SENSE !?"

❪ main masterlist | f1 masterlist | kpop masterlist ❫

━━━━━━━━━━❪ 🖤 ❫━━━━━━━━━━

f1

🎧 LIP GLOSS – THE BOYZ

liked by kev.in.orbit, ynusername, and 2 343 222 others

f1 sunwoo through the grid's eyes 👻.

View all comments

user I'm sorry, is that kim sunwoo with ROSCOE !? 😭😭

user pls I don't get why bro is everywhere in the FORMULA ONE PADDOCK WHAT IS HAPPENINGIDNDOEND

ynusername *sighs in tired girlfriend* what do I do with him ? send help.

↳ sunwoo u know u love me baby :)

↳ jakeyjbae she is so sick of ur menace ass bro 💀

↳ idisnew ur literally everywhere but ur own girl's paddock

↳ sunwoo what matters is, is that where ever I am, I'm always rooting for her !!

↳ tbzuyeon screw u, y/n I can be the perfect trophy boyfriend 😁

↳ sunwoo MF BACK THE HELL UP TF.

user I'm sorry... GIRLFRIEND !? as in, y/n l/n and kim sunwoo 😀😀😀

user I wish...I...if...words...

ynusername

liked by yukitsunoda0511, thesangyeon, and 978 233 others

ynusername tough day, we'll get 'em next time... well done yuks on p7 tho !!

View all comments

user you still did well y/n ! 🤍

yukitsunoda0511 thanks n/n :)

user okay but did ya'll see sunwoo raging in the paddocks 😭

↳ user girl, WHICH paddock, because I swear I saw bro in at least 3 different ones 😀💀

user y/n, babe, u gotta consider putting a leash or tracker on your boy 😭

↳ ynusername oh trust me, I'm considering it.

↳ sunwoo noooo :( , I just like exploring !

↳ q.feed leash him ! leas him ! leash him !

user the clip of y/n dragging sun back to the vca garage ny his ear will always have me cackling

user bro is like a kid in a candy store I swear

sunwoo

liked by ynusername, yukitsunoda0511, 1 232 222 others

sunwoo I swear she loves me guys :(

View all comments

yukitsunoda0511 yeah...I'm sure she does sun...

↳ landonorris so much, I'm almost sure of it

↳ sunwoo almost !? 😭

↳ oscarpiastri well mate, be still for 5 minutes so she doesn't have to run around like a girl on crack to find you, and maybe she'll be more adoring towards you... just a thought

↳ ynusername a very well said one osc, thank you.

user ain't no one taking sun's side pls 😭

ynusername sunwoo.

↳ sunwoo i love you i love you I love you please don't leave me I promise to never leave ur garage again even if lewis offers me yummy british candy and let's me play with roscoe, and max let's me touch his car when no ones looking, and-

↳ maxverstappen1 dammit sunwoo.

↳ ynusername now you've done it maximus.

↳ maxverstappen1 he wasn't supposed to tell !

↳ ynusername it's like you don't even know him at all !!

↳ sunwoo what's wrong ?

↳ ynusername don't worry about it love 💋

↳ sunwoo ...okay 😊❤

redbullracing y/n, I assume you'll settle this ?

↳ ynusername yeah yeah, I got it.

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taglist: @minkyungseokie @dreamyzhou @treehouse-mouse @ilivbullyingjeongin <3

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[misc-obeyme]

So uh. Lesson 38. Man I swear it was just yesterday I was writing the post about Lesson 37?! Augh.

Okay, spoilers below, and be prepared 'cause it was another CRAZY CRAZY LESSON. No I didn't take another 100 screenshots why would you think that? Also I apologize, this is another rather unhinged post.

OKAY NEW THEORY.

"Father" is Nightbringer! Right?!? Tell me I'm not alone in thinking this might be the case!!

Okay, so maybe not, but we had so much Father talk this lesson!! Way more than any other, I'd say!

And I hated it?!?

Okay lemme backtrack a bit.

So, we got Lucifer in ice and chains and he's yelling at his Father saying what do you want, you never tell me anything, give me a sign!

And then he breaks out of his chains, but he's completely out of control! And then DIAVOLO shows up.

SIR. There is just something about Diavolo in full demon form, getting all angry and ready to fight... But I don't think I've ever seen Diavolo with an ominous aura like that?? I can't remember for sure, but I swear it doesn't happen too often. Anyway, he straight up fights with Lucifer to try to calm him down.

The girls are fighting! I didn't crop this bottom image as much as I usually do because I need you all to see how BIG these two are in their full demon forms like this. All those wings...

Note that the angels and MC are watching all of this from the sidelines... and then Simeon blesses MC and I am in love with him and his beautiful face.

YOU are the only one making me swoon at the moment though.

Anyway, then all the bros show up and save the day! I was like yeah, that checks out. Lucifer & Diavolo are going at it and MC tries to get in the way, but it's not enough until all the others show up, too. As soon as Lucifer sees his brothers are all right, he calms down.

Asmo suggests a hug and Lucifer AGREES. They have a group hug where Lucifer is clearly pulling everyone into it himself. He apologizes to MC (!!) and THEN as if all this wasn't enough, MC's ring starts to glow and Lucifer turns into his angel form!!

Once again uncropped so you can see this ridiculous mf and all his wings.

Diavolo is smitten.

And he kneels!!!!!!

He kneels to Lucifer in angel form!!!! And all the others do too!!!!!

I lost my goddamn mind at this part. And Lucifer's like I don't understand why is this happening? And Simeon is like, "he" heard you and this is your answer. He wants you to feel his love and his forgiveness and blah blah blah (I'm paraphrasing). But I need to tell you all this even though I don't normally go into this much detail and here is why.

FUCK THAT GUY.

This is "his" way of showing Lucifer that he loves him?!?!

Diavolo, get off your knees, you are not helping this situation!!!

Okay, okay, let me calm down.

Here is why this bothers me so much. And please note that this just my personal opinion and the way it all came off to me! I'm totally open to hearing other opinions on it.

I hate this because it makes no sense. This is the same Father that was going to kill Lilith, the same one who allowed the brothers and Lucifer, the one he supposedly loves so much, to fall in the first place.

I don't care if Michael is the one behind everything. If their Father guy can do this, then there's no way he couldn't also prevent all of this.

The only way I'm going to give him a chance at all is if they somehow make it so that he can't do much at all. He's trapped or something. Michael is truly the mastermind behind it all and Father is doing what he can from where he is (like imprisoned or something).

Because otherwise, this makes no sense.

AND WASN'T I RIGHT?? It turned out that the whole thing was orchestrated by the Celestial Realm AND the Devildom! The three worlds have an agreement - powerful beings can be imprisoned in Cocytus for their crimes if at least two representatives out of three agree. One from the Celestial Realm did. This was confirmed by Simeon, who went back briefly to ask Michael. However, Michael wouldn't tell him who did it.

NO. You can't be content with that! Michael obviously knows who it was!! So why would he protect them?? Or is he protecting himself?!?

And then someone from the Devildom did, too! But instead of just being like oh well, guess it's a mystery, Diavolo blames himself and says he's doing everything he can to find out who did it. My money is on the House of Lords.

So they were in cahoots, as I suspected!

Anyway, I just don't understand what all of this was supposed to accomplish for Lucifer's character. If they want to make us question the Celestial Realm, then yo I was already on that train! This whole situation certainly makes Michael look very suspicious. And Lucifer goes on and on later about how he must have forgotten about his father's love and blah blah. And I'm like what???

Also this whole part where Lucifer was dreaming or whatever and the brothers were angels:

Levi says "Our orders always come through Michael." That's the crux of this whole thing. We don't know enough about the state of "Father" to really know for sure.

Again, if it turns out that "Father" isn't terrible and somehow had no say in all the bad things that are happening and was truly trying to help Lucifer, then fine. I can accept that. But from where things are right now, it seems more like "Father" can't let Lucifer go and in this case, that's making things worse for Luci.

Do you really think giving Lucifer back his angel form long enough for everyone to be in awe and even make Diavolo kneel is somehow helping him? Because I disagree. Leave Lucifer alone already.

Though he then passes out and sleeps for quite a while.

And oh! Okay, here is my favorite part hee hee:

Obviously I squealed a lil when he showed up! They were all stuck in Cocytus and couldn't figure out how to get home. And someone was like "if only Barbatos could portal us home" and then this happened.

My knight in shining armor 😭

He's so practical. I'm in love with him.

Then we make a pact with Lucifer. AND THIS MOTHERFUCKER.

Flashbacks to the OG, anyone?? I guess he would still lie to himself like this, we are in the past after all. And I think he genuinely believes that MC is his at first. What a delusional simp he turns out to be, though, huh?

And then!!

Cocytus Hall is destroyed because of course it was named that due to being built on top of the entrance to Cocytus. What was the point of that exactly? Why wasn't it just Purgatory Hall from the start?? I don't know.

Hard Lesson:

Diavolo, Barbatos, Mephisto, and all the Little Ds are discussing the destruction of Cocytus Hall and that's when we find out they rebuild it into Purgatory Hall.

We also see Little D No 1 who makes an appearance for the first time. Barbatos says he wasn't able to maintain a physical form up until now. Diavolo speculates it's because their "Father" couldn't let Lucifer go before.

I do not understand this "Father" at all. I'm so confused about it and it's making me crazy (in case you couldn't tell).

Yeah, we got to make a pact with Lucifer. We got to kiss him. It's heavily implied we did some other stuff with him, too.

But this lesson was mostly about Father and his love and to me that all seemed to come out of freakin' nowhere. Especially since last I checked, it was Father who caused all of this bullshit to begin with???

I don't actually think "Father" is Nightbringer, but wouldn't that be interesting? Father of all demons is also the father of all angels? Why would they be different entities? Maybe they're two halves of the same whole? Maybe they're siblings?

I just don't know.

Yeah that's how I felt when Simeon and the angels were like okay see ya we're going back to the Celestial Realm! It's okay, Barb saved us. At least he seems to be chill about things.

And Solomon told the brothers he wasn't going to take MC back to the human world right away, so it's not the end yet. But can we go back now? I want to! I swear by now, I'd have confronted Barbatos because I think he knows what's going on and couldn't he just take me back to the present without all these other shenanigans? And make Solomon come back with me too, obviously. In fact, past!Barb can come too. You can never have too many Barbs!

Okay I'm devolving into nonsense. I just don't know how I feel about any of this. It's not making sense and I really hope that the next lesson clears some of this up for me.

[tiredfox64]

Hi how was your day? Or night I just want to ask if you still take request 😅 if you don't then you can ignore me and if you still take then I have an idea for you 😆 after I read your hijab reader I immediately fall in love with your writing 😍 the way you write makes me feel like I'm the one in the story and I really really really really LOVE IT!!!!! and today I just came back from the hospital because of the breathing problems and stuff I had to stay for a week in hospital 🥲 I swear staying in hospital drive me crazy 😭 no privacy and syringe needles and medicines are scary! So... Maybe maybe... Can you write something makes me feel a little better?

(Please 🥺)

So the idea lin kuei bros and Earthrealm champions with the reader ... Can you make it female reader? Like the reader loves to dance in her room when she's alone and wearing the boys over sized clothes? And yeah like her boobies juggles bom bom yk yk 😇 Yeah like dancing like crazy or beautifully or anything you want with any song but I think international love from Pitbull will be better and it's okay if you want to change the song you know 😆 and the boys would be walking in her room while she was dancing alone crazy and enjoy herself to ask something or wanted something with her and they like ".......damn!" You know, you can do the reason anything you want you can make the reader not notice them or she did is really up to you ❤

And thank you if you did this for me 🥺 you might don't believe that but I love doing it enjoying myself alone in my room wearing big shirt and dancing like crazy to let out all stress and enjoying myself 😂 and sometimes my mother would caught me and I'm be really embarrassed 😂 even though I'm Muslim I still have a rocking star spirit you know I can't live my life without songs and music 😆 even though my life is s*itty but I'll always find a way to forget it and enjoy my life ❤

The same about you lovely I wish that you do just like me enjoying your life every day also make sure to take care of yourself drink water and sleep well don't be like me believe me staying in hospital isn't fun 🥲

And thank you again you can ignore it if you don't like it I won't be mad 😊 I understand that writing a stuff not easy Thank you ❤🌹

(Damn I talk like grandma 😂)

Swing Your Feet

Prior notes: I hope you are doing better! Hospitals really suck. I used to scream when they tried to use needles. Hopefully my writing can make you feel a little better.

Pairing: Lin Kuei Bros & Earthrealm Champions x Afab reader

Warnings ‼️: Can you handle the beat?

There’s a sneaky weasel that has been stealing some clothes from some important people. Important people that are in the Lin Kuei and who are Earthrealm’s champions. Would you by any chance know where they could have gone?

Of course you do, you’re the weasel. A weasel who is blaring music in her room, spinning wildly like a tornado of rhythm. The boys on the other floor are forced to hear your music blaring while they play a game of Uno. You sure do have a mix of interesting music.

Johnny decided a nice way to get close with everyone was to play a nice game of Uno. Uno is never nice what was he thinking.

He invited the brothers to come to the Wu Shi academy to play as well. Tomas was the only one willing to play so Kuai Liang had to drag Bi-Han over. Oh hell, Kuai Liang decided to play as well. Not Bi-Han. Bi-Han and Uno don’t go together.

Round after round it was getting even more unhinged. Lots of yelling and accusations of cheating. You never heard it. You were too occupied with the blaring music and move your feet to match the beat.

“Ah dang it, Tomas! How do you keep beating us.” Johnny complained.

Tomas had this smug grin on his face. He was just lucky tonight. Or he was cheating. We’ll never know.

Johnny was done. Game over. He was about to pull down his sunglasses since he didn’t need to prevent anyone from cheating, only to feel that his sunglasses were gone. Not again. He looked around him and could not find his sunglasses.

“Come on! How did this happen again?” He yelled in annoyance.

“Another piece of our clothes has gone missing again.” Kung Lao said in defeat.

“Wait, your clothes have been stolen as well?” Kuai Liang asked.

Everyone looked at him in shock. So they too have been missing clothes at random. Not just accessories but full on outfits.

Kung Lao’s hoodie, Raiden’s shirts, button-ups from Johnny and Kenshi, and uniforms from Kuai Liang, Tomas, and Bi-Han. This is not a coincidence. This is suspicious. The only person who hasn’t gotten their clothes stolen is you.

“Alright,” Johnny slapped his hand against the table, “Start placing bets on what might be going on. Kenshi, go!”

“I think it’s you since you stole Sento and still won’t give it back.” He responded passive aggressively.

“Alright I’m not taking you seriously. Raiden, what do you think it is?”

“Uhh…a rat.”

“A rat is stealing our clothes?” Johnny questioned.

“A big rat. The kind that you told us about that challenge people in New York and Chicago.” A good guess Raiden, but no New York rat is gonna bother stealing clothes. They steal pizza and wallets.

“I think it’s someone with invisibility powers.” Kung Lao jumped in.

“That’s seems more reasonable. What else are we thinking?”

“Maybe it is the one who is blaring music in her room.” Bi-Han spoke up.

“What makes you think it’s her.” Kuai Liang asked.

“Because I watched her come out quickly and take his sunglasses before running back to her room.”

These fools were so focused on their game of Uno that they never noticed you coming out and sliding Johnny’s glasses right off his head. Bi-Han was the only one who caught you since he wasn’t playing. He didn’t care enough that you were taking them, he doesn’t even wanna be here.

Bi-Han and Johnny were left bickering about how he never said a thing while everyone else was contemplating about confronting you. You had no ill intent that’s for sure. It’s just nice wearing their clothes. It’s a girl thing.

“She’ll have to give our clothes back eventually. We don’t know what she is doing with them anyways.” Tomas chimed in.

That settles it. They decided to confront you on your actions. What you were doing with their clothes is a mystery to them. Maybe if they know what you are doing with them they will let you keep it.

They make their way to your room. The closer they get the louder the music is. Some of them could even feel the vibrations below their feet and in their hearts. The music you were playing all night was all over the place. Yet you still managed to move your hips and stomp your feet. You were groovin and movin. Some of them approved of the music, some were unsure of this was their type. Whatever floats your boat.

Johnny first tried knocking on your door, no answer. He knocked harder, no answer again. He sighed before trying the handle. You left your door unlocked by accident. He started opening to door.

“Hey, so quick question. Would you by any chance know where—OH!”

All their eyes fell upon you. There you were, jumping around on your bed with Johnny’s button-up shirt. The sleeves were long enough to cover your hands, making the excess material wave around as you moved. Your chest pressed against tightly against his chest. The buttons were putting up a fight as they tried to keep your chest from bursting out. They were jiggling as you pranced around. You had not a single clue that the boys were staring at you. The music was just too loud you never even heard Johnny speak.

It’s probably better that you don’t know. You know what they say: dance like no one’s watching.

The boys just stared in awe, even Bi-Han. If the shirt wasn’t a big clue or even that you are wearing Johnny’s glasses, all their clothes were scattered around your room. Every shirt, belt, and accessories that you scavenged was all over the place. You might have had a little fashion show before deciding to dance in Johnny’s clothes.

I won’t tell.

Your movements were enchanting them. Movements that were fluid and matched the rhythm well. Have you ever thought about being a background dancer? You would do well.

You must do this all the time considering you weren’t slipping up. You weren’t bumping into any furniture or tripping over your own feet. It’s natural to you. You’re having fun. And so are the boys I guarantee.

“Damn-“ Johnny was about to say more but all of them quickly covered his mouth.

They didn’t want you to know they were watching. You were in your natural state they must let you be. The music was about to end soon meaning you might finally realize they are there. No, no, they can’t have that. They slowly crept out of your room before closing the door quietly. It was as if they were never there.

There was a silence between them all. They have this information, what will they do with it? Nothing. They won’t change a thing. So what if you steal their clothes. You seemed to be putting it to good use.

“Tomas,” Bi-Han broke the silence, “do you wish to return for another round of that ridiculous card game? Perhaps next week.”

Tomas immediately nodded his head and so did Kuai Liang. They will be using Uno as their excuse for why they are coming around so often.

“I suggest we make it a weekly thing.“ Raiden knows you do this every week.

“I bet she will wear my hoodie next.” Kung Lao said with a goofy smile on his face.

“I see we are betting again. Fine, we’ll make this a weekly game night with some betting.” Kenshi was in for it.

“And then a show at the end.” Johnny was rubbing his hands like a malicious fly just thinking about it.

So it was settled. It’s like when men start digging holes at beaches it’s a mutual agreement no matter what. The brothers left peacefully while the champions got ready for bed.

And you had no idea that they had caught you red handed. And you won’t for a while.

I certainly won’t snitch for either side. You’ll know when you’ll know. But when you do, keep dancing. It’s the best thing to do in life.

After notes: I know you said one song but there were many options I could have used so I put them all in. Think of it as the music playing and changing as you continue to dance. They were also what I was listening to so don’t mind. I hope you can enjoy and yes I will try to take care of myself. I try my best to enjoy life and on days like this it can feel pretty easy. I hope you have a wonderful life. Adiós!

[kisses4tom]

ᡣ𐭩 UNCLE TOMMY

───────────────

okay so basically Bill had a child with either you or another girl, (we're going to pretend the baby is a girl named Kimberly 😉), but nevertheless Tom is an uncle and uhm yeah i think it's adorable

───────────────

He would be the cool uncle that teaches fun things

He would get her anything she wants from the toy store

Always holding her

Playing with her a lot

He would teach her bad words to piss off Bill 😭

Since him and Bill are very close, he would always be at Bill's house to help him

Would let her eat loads of candy

When Bill told him he was going to be an uncle he couldn't believe it and even if he tried to keep his cool as much as possible, it was impossible for him to hold back tears of joy for his brother

He's very careful and gentle with her

He would pick her up in weird ways and make her laugh (like upside down etc lmfao 💀)

He would tickle her a lot to hear her little laugh

His heart is always full whenever she's around

Personal babysitter

"Come to uncle Tommy, come!"

He would genuinely treat her as his own baby (kind of yk)

Role-playing all the time because she makes him 😭 (lmfao imagine him in a fairy costume that's waaay too small for him 😭 GIRL BYE I WOULD MARRY HIM)

I feel like he would call her "bro" or "dude" at times whenever she does something unexpected or unhinged 😭 (lmfao she's a babyyy)

Always pushing her stroller or carrying her on his shoulders

He would organize Carnival nights with the whole family and take her to as many rides as she wants

He would win prizes to give her

if you're dating Tom, he would ask her if she wants you as her auntie and if she accepts you as his wife 🥹

He would kneel down to talk to her (😩 have my babies)

He would get into play fights with her at the dinner table 😭

Whenever Bill is dropping her off at his house, he would run to the car and get her out of the car seat himself. "come here! uncle Tommy missed youuu!"

He would play guitar for her and when she was younger he would play little lullabies

He could go crazy over that baby's cuteness

He would take her baths every once in a while and put fun toys in the tub

He would take her to the park a lot to get her tired for nap time

The first time he met her it was like love at first sight for him even if he didn't quite know how to act out of shock and confusion (his mind was like foggy idrk how to explain it)

When she's older he would start being more himself (so talk about things freely and make dirty jokes all the time)

I feel like he would try his best to let the baby's first word be "uncle Tom" 😭

He's the overprotective uncle

He loves having her around

Having her around makes him wish he had a child (NO WORRIES BABE COME HERE)

He would be so sweet and cuteeee 😭 I can't guys I'm ovulating sorry 😭

I feel like he would love to play with the toy kitchen for some reason 💀

He would let her do his hair but not his make-up

Kiss attacks when he gets the chance

He's always at Bill's house just to hang with her

"Bill I swear she looks more like me than you"

They have a great bond

When she's older it won't stop him from taking her to places or spoil her

He loves when she's at their concerts

He claims to be the best uncle in the world, and that she's lucky to have him as one

At lunch/dinner he would always sit next to her

At the table he would teach her funny slangs or words

He would make her try to eat a lemon

He'd go down the slide with her 😭

You get the vision right? 🥹🫶🏻

[venusjaynie]

stranger things social media!!

all the older kids are 18-21 and The Party are 15-16

steve harrington x fem!reader

series mastlist

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

y/ns.priv24

Liked by itsbuckleybitch, thefreakmunson, dustybunhenderson, willthewise and others.

y/ns.priv24: "baby, take a pic with this sweet view behind me."

View comments.

itsbuckleybitch: he looks like a stickman

↳ stevie.h: shut the fuck up

↳ y/ns.priv24: you're so right rob

↳ stevie.h: wow babe i expected better from you

↳ y/ns.priv24: you're a very cute stickman

thefreakmunson: the thought of the both of you atop a mountain taking pictures of each other is so cute it makes me sick

↳ y/ns.priv24: love u too eddie

b.hargrove: harrington wtf is wrong with your face

↳ stevie.h: bite me hargrove

johnnybyers: this comment section is the reason i'm fucking insane you are all so annoying (even you baby sis)

↳ y/ns.priv24: i may be annoying but at least i'm mom's favourite.

↳ johnnybyers: i would come back with something equally as harsh but we both know will is mom's favourite

↳ y/ns.priv24: ...yeah that's true. seriously he gets possessed by some fucking demon one time and all of a sudden he's the light of mom's life

↳ willthewise: not cool big sis. not cool

stevie.h

Liked by b.hargrove, nanceewheeler, mikey7 and others

stevie.h: just chillin by the sea with my favourite girl

tagged: y/ns.priv24

View comments.

itsbuckleybitch: wait why are you guys kinda cute

↳ stevie.h: you're only realising this now???

dustybunhenderson: you are literally my parents

↳ stevie.h: not cool dude

↳ dustybunhenderson: mom dad's being mean to me

↳ y/ns.priv24: steve don't be mean to our son

↳ stevie.h: oh my

nanceewheeler: the cutest ever

↳ y/ns.priv24: um not as cute as you and j

↳ stevie.h: excuse me we're way cuter than nance and jonathan

y/ns.priv24

Liked by b.hargrove, johnnybyers, stevie.h, itsbuckleybitch and others.

y/ns.priv24: it's all well and good that billy and steve got over their issues, and i'm glad they aren't at each others throats 24/7 anymore, but can i just point out that they aren't even planking correctly? did no one else notice this?

View comments.

b.hargrove: okay rude

↳ y/ns.priv24: learn how to plank first then you can call me rude

↳ b.hargrove: you bitch

↳ stevie.h: hey cut it out dumbass. that's my girl you're talking to. i'll beat your ass

itsbuckleybitch: i did notice, and i'm really glad someone spoke up about this issue. thank you.

↳ y/ns.priv24: i appreciate your concern for the wellbeing of my boyfriend's and his (boy)friend's back. you're welcome.

↳ b.hargrove: WOAH WOAH WOAH WHAT

↳ stevie.h: yeah dude wth

↳ y/ns.priv24: call me dude again and i'll skin you alive bro

↳ b.hargrove: JESUS CHRIST WHAT THE HELL

↳ johnnybyers: go little sis. you slay.

↳ johnnybyers: WILL TOOK MY PHONE I SWEAR I DON'T SAY SLAY

itsbuckleybitch

Liked by y/ns.priv24, nanceewheeler, stevie.h, dustybunhenderson, thefreakmunson and others.

itsbuckleybitch: amazing show yesterday dingus. we had a blast

View comments.

y/ns.priv24: currently googling how to become a microphone

↳ stevie.h: glad you enjoyed the show sweetheart

↳ y/ns.priv24: i really did. you're incredible stevie

↳ thefreakmunson: oh my god get a room

b.hargrove: loved the show man (also currently googling how to become said mic)

↳ y/ns.priv24: SEE. BOYFRIENDS.

nanceewheeler

Liked by y/ns.priv24, stevie.h, johnnybyers and others.

nanceewheeler: y/n and i's favourite boys

View comments.

mikeymikey: hey i thought i was your favourite

↳ nanceewheeler: why would you think that?

y/ns.priv24: stevie i forgot how big your arms are can you choke me

↳ stevie.h: oh my god

itsbuckleybitch: this is quite horrifying

↳ stevie.h: i apologise for my girlfriends unhinged comments

↳ itsbuckleybitch: no i meant your face in the picture dingus

willthewise: i'm actually y/n's favourite boy.

↳ stevie.h: sure you are buddy

↳ y/ns.priv24: oh steve how do i put this nicely...

↳ stevie.h: you're on the couch tonight

↳ y/ns.priv24: NO STEVE WAIT

johnnybyers

Liked by nanceewheeler, stevie.h, willthewise, mikey7, and others

johnnybyers: my person.

View comments.

y/n's.priv24: stop you guys are so cute get married rn.

↳ jonnybyers: thanks kiddo (ik you only want us to get married so you can be a bridesmaid for nance)

↳ nanceewheeler: correction - maid of honour

stevie.h: you guys are almost as cute as me and y/n

↳ y/ns.priv24: i'd say we're equally as cute.

↳ dustybunhenderson: i agree with steve. my parents are the cutest

↳ stevie.h: DUDE

↳ y/ns.priv24: HAHAHAHAHAHA

[captainjacklyn]

Hey, yo, you probably saw me on one of your posts. I was wondering if you could do the arcana twilight characters reacting to reader training Precious to destroy sisuris's balls l, I'm so sorry for this post, but I had to. You could skip if you want to. Also, sorry for misspelling sisuris name.

HAHAHAHAGHDJWEH- no worries my friend, there is absolutely no harm done on your part, I'm glad you enjoy that crack shit post and I hope you enjoy reading this one as much as I enjoyed writing it.

character(s) : spica, alpheratz, arcturus, pollux, vega

warning(s) : someone's balls being obliterated, a feral ferret and a vengeful summoner that just wants to see blood.

Spica

Speechless and just straight up lost, man is just looking at us for a good minute before continuing to walk down the aisle like nothing happened.

for reference his face looked like this :

He says nothing, he's just confused and tells himself that he needs coffee thinking he's hallucinating due to all the work he has to do.

don't even bother explaining, Spica will pass out and Precious is going to take that opportunity to destroy.

"Wrong target Precious I'm not letting you hurt rapunzel."

"AHDJEREJHR !"

Alpheratz

Hype man right here, he's literally helping you coach that killing machine to end Sirius.

Precious actually stops trying to rip his wig off and is now accepting him as a friend, sort of.

I love this trio ! A batshit crazy animal, their batshit insane owner and the owner's boyfriend who hates the same person they hate.

Once precious is released into the city to found that sexy gun man, it's over for him.

It crawls it's way through the streets, hissing at anything in it's way until it finds the legs of the enemy..and CRUNCH GOES THE BALLS OF THE ASSHOLE-

*screams in agony*

Arcturus

[Name] I don't think you have to- "HAJSKFBEFUEKR-"

Precious held on to his leg for a week, it didn't wanna let go for even a minute. Had to constantly keep this ginger man in a hospital because the moment he got out he would bleed extensively.

Once it got off of him, you just continued to train your unhinged creature.

Precious is really going balls out for the game I'll tell ya that, we're not just speaking about the nutcracker here we're talking about the sacrifice of future generations as well.

This poor dude is just standing on the sidelines like : you don't have to do this but I still support you because that's really all I can do...

Pollux

Oh he means business.

We got another coach right here- bro is going to ANNIHILATE sirius and whatever is left.

Although he keeps wincing whenever it actually happens, I mean they're both guys he knows just how painful it can get.

It's really terrifying to be honest just witnessing something that violent.

I mean who would expect this :

to act like THIS :

That's pollux trying to hold it, Precious is completely calm and rational with it's beloved owner.

Vega

._.

wut ?

like Spica, he will stand there, but not like Spica, he will remain standing there for a very long time.

Even Precious stops bitting the plastic toy that now looks like it's been shredded, even you stop encouraging your cute psychopath of a beast.

why are you giving it more attention ? HIIIIIISSSSSSSS-

He doesn't give a shit, we all know just how much of a simp he gets when it comes to you.

I love how I skipped the part where Precious tried to lunge at him and remove his eyeballs from his eye sockets.

You luckily managed to avoid that, but now you got an animal and a touch-starved white boy clinging onto you for dear life.

Vega I need to proceed with my ferret's training so could you please ? no. ...You're lucky you're just as adorable as my electric saw. BFUKETGEHTK$#$ PRECIOUS STOP SWEARING-

Have a good day I hope you liked it.

[obsidiancreates]

From Regular Wednesday To Regular Whimsday

(I still haven't watched past 41 in OUAW, I keep just restarting it, so for the OUAW gang this is just some unspecified time in the swamps of Hither.)

It starts with Witchlight, of course. A patch of mushrooms, a mysterious artifact that could reportedly "open doors to new worlds of possibilities", and the whims of a 20 year old with ADHD and the ability to write whatever the fuck xey want.

And so the artifact shatters in the patch of Witchlight, and Carnival LeCroux find themselves faced with six deeply confused, highly concerned, and bafflingly identical humans.

"Well this is diffrrrent," Torbek says, scratching his head. "Isn't it usually uuus who Witchlight messeees withhh?"

"Must've been that orb thing!" Kremy searches the mud below them by poking his cane around in it.

"Roman, what is this?" The human in the dark shirt and blue-striped tie asks the one in the white-and-red royal-like getup.

"Don't look at me." Roman points at a human with a similar but more elaborate outfit of green and black. "Whatever this horrid imagining is, it must be Remus!"

"Oh, thank you, brother, it is horrible here! But, I didn't do it! Maybe good ol' Daddo did? He's been a frog before, frogs, swamps-"

"Please, Patton would never bring us somewhere this gr-oss!"

"And I really only looked like that because we were talkin' about Frogger." The human in the lighter blue shirt with the gray covering tied around his neck says, wincing a little and adjusting his glasses. "Virgil? Do you know where we are, kiddo?"

"No." The human in the patchwork purple and black hoodie is tense, ready for either fight or flight (probably flight, based on his general vibe). He looks around, eyeing Carnival Lecroux. "And those guys seem way too active to be any imaginary constructs. ... I told you guys we shouldn't have let Janus convince Thomas to have another glass of wine tonight! We're probably in some... weird nightmare because of it!"

"Oh, blaming me, what a surprise." The final human- well, maybe not. While most of him looks human, half of his face is covered with scales. His cheek has a natural slit implying an ability to unhinge his jaw quite wide but only on that side (so he probably can't actually, because his other cheek would be completely screwed if he tried), and his eye is bright yellow with a slitted pupil.

"Slit pupil means he's venomous," Frost warns his friends. "Right, Gricko?"

"Oh, yeah, yeah. I've never seen a snake-folk before, though, actually."

"He's barely a reptile-folk at all!" Kremy points at the kind of-human. "Either fuckin' commit or don't!"

"Oh, okay, gettin' some strong language here! Let's uh, elt's tone that down, how about, huh?" Patton looks at Remus. "Kinda leaning towards this being you, now."

"What, like I'm the only one who swears between us?! Ro-bro here-" Remus slings an arm around his brother, who quickly shoves it off. "-is the one who came up with Bitchmas!"

"I was in a heated debate! I'm just very passionate!"

"You're a potty-mouth! Even more than me!"

"I have to disagree, Remus. Your deodorant alone is all the evidence I need to contradict you."

"Mmm, but does contradicting me really matter if no-one cares to pay attention, Logan?"

"Oooooh, they've got drama." Twig climbs down from Gideon's shoulders. "This is just like those trashy major images!"

"We are not trashy!" Roman looks at his brother. "Well, most of us are not trashy. And we are not from some... major image!"

"Roman, I don't know that you need to justify us to the imaginary child."

"I'm not a child! I'm a Twig!"

"As in your name?"

"Yeah!"

"Then those are not mutually exclusive concepts."

"Alright, alright, enough of all this!" Kremy points at Logan with his cane. "Y'all explain yourselves right now so we can get a fuckin' move on!"

"Boy, lotta f-bombs being thrown around by this guy." Patton plays with the sleeves of the hoodie around his neck.

"Why would I explain? The only possibility is this is happening within Thomas's mind, so I see no reason to-"

"OH, GREAT FLYNN RIDER'S SMOLDER! Logan, there is another possibility! A whimsical, fantastical, impossible possibility!"

"That... is already a contradiction within itself."

"We... have been TRANSPORTED TO ANOTHER WORLD!" Roman strikes a pose, one arm aloft in the air and the other held close t his chest as he gazes up into the sky.

"That is absolutely impossible."

"Uh... I dunno." Virgil looks down at the mud and swamp ooze clinging to his boots and pants. "I do feel... weirdly solid, right now."

"Yes! Some kind of incredible magic has taken us OUT OF THE REALM OF PRETEND and into a true fairytale!" Roman's eyes positively sparkle.

"First of all, magic does not exist."

The entire Carnival Crew look at each other. These people are either completely insane, or from what sounds like the worst world ever. No magic is like no stones for building, no wood for burning, no air for breathing.

Logan continues. "Second of all, if we have been somehow transported, beyond all possibility and the very logic that makes up my being, where is Thomas?"

Gideon puffs on his cigar. "Quit talkin' between yerselves! Just answer Kremy's fuckin' question, man!"

"The... alligator-man did not ask a question. He told us to explain ourselves."

"Oh-ho my gods! He's worse than Frost!"

Frost doesn't show if he's offended or not. He simply goes, "Mmm."

"I don't care what you say, Logan-"

"Not new information to me."

"-I am going to treat this as a grand magical adventure! Clearly we have been taken away to a world of magic and monstrosities to fulfill some grand quest, and these uh... strange creatures, are the proverbial tutorial for our journey!"

Gideon leans down to Kremy's ear. "Can I punch 'im?"

"Not yet, Gid. But probably later."

"Mmph, fine."

Roman points at the other party. "My good sirs! We are the Sanders Sides, a group of uh- what's the word you use, Logan?"

"Fine, I shall play along until a reasoning more aligned with myself is presented by someone who will actually be listened to. The word I use is Metaphysical, it simply means not actually physical beings."

"Yes! Metaphysical adventurers from another world!"

Frost leans in, intrigued. "What exactly do you mean, you aren't actually physical beings?"

Logan speaks before Roman can give his own explanation- likely for the best, as the words 'Well, nerd,' were clearly to be Roman's next input to the conversation. Logan, instead, matches the energy of Frost with his clear explanation.

"Well, to put it simply we are personifications of various aspects of Thomas's personality and mental processes. Our main function, and reason for existence, is often to externalize an issue that would normally be resolved through an internal examination and investigation."

"Wow, that's uh- that's really quite interesting. And yet you all take on these uh, these-these roles, and personalities, beyond your intended representations?"

"Yes, and the... severity, of these individualizations has increased drastically over the years."

"So you've had a-a growth cycle! You've developed your minds to contain intricacies and um, and greater depth of character, literally."

"Well- yes, I suppose that is not an inaccurate way of stating it, but again we are not individuals. We are not actually capable of fulfilling many of the requirements considered for actual-"

"OH MY GOSHHHHH!" As Patton cuts Logan off with a joyous scream, Logan's huff of indignation goes unnoticed by all but the fascinated Frost. Instead, all attention turns to the creature who has stepped out of the bushes. Giant round eyes, soft and fluffy fur-feathers, a little beat that the leg of a frog is quickly swallowed into.

"I'm going to cry," Patton breathes, hands clasped up by his mouth.

Logan clears his throat and adjusts his glasses. "It is a very adorable creature. And apparently docile, which I assume means it's with these people."

"OH, of course she is!" Gricko throws himself at the adorable owlbear, clinging to her neck with a hug as she muzzles her face into his. "This is my daughter Hootsie, Hootsie T. Cutesie-Grimgrin!"

"Don't you mean pet?"

Gricko looks at Logan with horror. "No! She's my daughter, and a very bright little girl, oooooh Hootsie, he didn't mean it, they must not have adoption in whatever world he's from."

"What? Of course we understand the concept of adoption, but-"

"Well y'all said you ain't got magic where you're from, so it ain't too unreasonable to assume you're lackin' a buncha other stuff as well!" Kremy gestures at Logan with the ground-end of his cane, flinging swamp muck onto the human's shirt.

Logan sets his jaw and looks Kremy in the eyes while flicking the muck off. "Our world lacking in nonsensical magic does not mean it lacks basic concepts such as adoption. I was proposing a correction because, while it is clear anthropomorphic animal-human hybrids are a normalcy here, that... is just a bear with an owl face."

"Hey! You keep shit-talkin' our niece, I'm gonna punch you right in the body!"

"I am not-"

"AWWWWW, you guys think of each other as family?"

Kremy taps the eyehole if his skull cane topper. "Well, I dunno if-"

"Hell yeah we're a family!" Gideon grabs Hootsie, and by extension Gricko, and holds them both in a hug. "Been travellin' together so fuckin' long an' know so much about each other, what else could we be?"

"I mean we could be a group or uh-"

"Ooooooh, but Mr. Kremyyyyyy, Torbek thinks of you all as faaamily."

The screams of the entire collective, Sides and Carnival alike, could deafen someone unused to either party. Twig and Roman especially.

"Oh-ho, geez, man! We forgot you were here!" Gideon thumps Torbek on the back. "You gotta stop doin' that!"

"He does that a lot?!" Vigril, adrenaline leaving him, drops out of his pose to bolt and sinks deep into his hoodie. The words come out more like spittle, forcing their way through gritted teeth.

"Ooooh, Torbek doesn't mean to. People just forget Torbek exists."

"That's not a terrifying notion at all." Janus keeps his cane hoisted up and arm cocked for a swing, just in case. "There's nothing alarming about a seven foot tall glowing monster who can completely vanish from notice without even trying."

"I knew he was still here!" Remus twirls his morningstar and walks over to Torbek, burying his face in Torbek's closest patch of fur and taking a deep sniff. "You reek! It is delightful!"

"Oooooh- huh? Wait, reeeeally? You find Torbek deliiightfuuul?"

"Oh, abso-lutely! What is that smell, I have never whiffed it before! Is it your deodorant? What flavor is it called?!"

"Uuuuuuh, what's deodorannnt?"

Remus blinks up at Torbek with a grin absolutely carved into his face. "You're going to be my new best friend. Sorry Janus!"

"I don't care at all." Janus examines his "fingernails", despite the presence of his gloves. "The title means nothing to me."

"You love me!" Remus begins to literally climb Torbek. "Now let me see these glowing drug implants! This place is a wealth of new ideas!"

"Please do not encourage my brother," Roman says with a look of disgust.

"We ain't, I think he's just encouragin' himself. And trust us, we've tried makin' Torbek a little more presentable."

"Yeah! When he was all tiny in my inn, he got a nice bath and makeover! But it got ruined as soon as he fell out." Twig holds up her tiny satchel-sized inn for Roman to see.

"Your- oh, look at that! Now that is the kind of whimsy and fantastical magic I was looking for!"

"Speaking of looking, let's look for a way home." Virgil is no longer quite so pressed into his hoodie, but the hood is still up over his head. "What is Thomas going through right now? You guys said when I ducked out, things got bad. Now we're all gone!"

"Oh, sweet Tatiana's beignets, he's right! Thomas could be in serious peril!"

"That's assuming our roles as facets of his personality still apply to us at this moment. Given that we have physical forms-"

Remus's head snaps around and he shouts, "You're all aware of your own breathing!"

Everyone splutters and gasps and makes general noises of upset as suddenly Breathing becomes a conscious effort.

"And we've all got heartbeats!" Remus giggles and claps his hands as even more displeasure rings out, and he simply turns back to trying to part Torbek's fur around the implants and see the scars. Torbek shifts uncomfortably, but his ear twitches and his eyes glaze with a bit of relief- Remus is unintentionally helping scratch a few itches and clean some gunk from Torbek's fur.

Virgil has his hand over his heart. "Is mine supposed to be racing this much?"

"Well, everyone has a different resting heart rate, Virgil. Allow me to- oh my goodness. Ahem. No, that is likely because your, well, you, has spiked with Remus's comments."

"Hhhnnnnggg..."

"Okay, Virgil, now would be the time to utilize those breathing exercises you've taught Thomas."

"Little easier to say than do, Logan!"

"Well, simply try."

"Yes, and if the racing nature of your heart causes you other health problems, Gricko may be able to help." Frost gestures at the goblin who, when Torbek had frightened everyone, had dropped from Hootsie's neck and landed head-first in the soft muck of the swamp. Gricko puts up a single thumbs-up, still quite stuck and dazed, though his nose peeks out just enough for him to breath without worry of suffocation.

Logan blinks. "He, is your doctor?"

"Not exactly, he is uh- let me pull him out, actually, he may want to correct you."

Frost does not move to pull Gricko up- but up Gricko comes anyway, a shhhhhplop! following some invisible force yanking him from the mud.

"Oh, thank you, Frosty," Gricko says, his voice becoming mumbled and somewhat slurred at the last word. "Anyway! Um, yes, I am not exactly a doctor, I am a druid. I can help with some basics healings but not everything."

"Like Torbek's various raaashes."

"Ooooh, you have rashes? Where?!"

"Remus, you will get rashes if you touch them," Janus says, reaching up with his cane and swiftly pulling Remus down to the ground. "Having a real body means you can actually get diseases now."

"Oh, Janny, you're saying that like it's a bad thing!"

"Which means real, symptoms? Including things like death?"

"I still don't see the issue here."

"Okay. Does anyone have a leash?"

"Ooooooh, yes, please."

"Eugh."

[zalrb]

PLL 2x02 Review - As Per Anon Request

"And WHY is Melissa answering him?" "I mean is she?" Can you not see the text history?? It's the 2010s, we know how texts works now.

Someone is probably going to have remind me that Jason is Alison's brother.

And Spencer's half brother or something? Is that right?

"He's worried about you" does he pay child support?? You were stealing shit because you refused to downsize, Hanna's mom.

Emily's mom: Leave your phone downstairs so I can regulate who you're calling.

Also Emily's mom: *leaves Emily's bedroom without taking her phone so Emily can just call Spencer*

"omggg how are we going to talk at school??" Aria's mom is the only one who is actually at the school and she doesn't know her daughter is being groomed by her colleague, you can do whatever you want at school, wdym.

Aria needs to stop wearing big earrings.

THEY ARE SO BORING.

"Don't you read the papers or listen to the news?" "No." MONA. The actress commits to the bit. I respect it.

Aria, why are you telling Mona all this?

LMAO is this Toby's hero hair??

Ngl, it's a step up. His season 1 hair was a MESS.

Just let Claire do her regular accent, please.

Samara, how old are you? Why aren't you at college?

They have the most chemistry, though.

Bro, do you pay child support or alimony?

GET OUT OF HERE. I like how the music is dramatic to show how unhinged Jason is but when he throws the newspaper it lands on the ground in front of the dog instead of him actually hitting the dog with the newspaper, and not that we had to see the newspaper hit the dog but they could've cut away so it looked like he hit the dog with it.

The issue with PLL is a lot of the dialogue is rehashing things we already know, like why do I have to hear AGAIN about what's going on with Spencer and the police just because she's talking to Jason. Give me NEW information.

Jesus christ, the scout would be at her house or at a restaurant.

Like, Emily would not be explaining this to her mother herself, the scout would be having this conversation with her.

Toby, I swear to God, you can inflect.

Aria, it's been over an hour. LEAVE. You shouldn't even BE there in the first place.

I do think it's funny that Aria was all Spencer you're the Queen of Time or Master of Time or whatever and Spencer never answered Aria's question, she just sees Toby and is like gotta go. Another show would've had her drop her Time Wisdom before hanging up. But not this one. You're on your own, Aria.

"I'm sorry it seems that way." LOL at least they got deadbeat dads right.

Seriously, Ezria or whatever they're called are boring AF.

Claire's accent is struggggggggling.

Sophomore English ... sophomore high school English or college?

I ship no one on this show more than Mona and Hanna honestly.

No, I don't *ship* ship them, it's just they're fun.

LOL gotta love Spencer and her rationality. "You should've told me he was texting her." "Why? What would you have done?" "I would've done something." "WHAT?" "... ... I don't know." Mmhmm. And she knew it.

Why aren't you two comfortable with each other yet? You fell asleep on his lap, Spencer. Girl, sit next to him.

Aria's shoes are RIDICULOUS.

Well, it was Aria's turn to be attacked.

"The fact that A can just break into our houses??" And none of you have security cameras. It probably wouldn't have mattered anyway since A is a supernatural entity.

She's going to forge the letter obviously but he would just talk to her parents.

Stop using the classroom time to talk to your underage girlfriend through code, Ezra.

"Always read, have a good life!" Shut UP.

Is this the stupid rain kiss scene?

No, but it's a parking lot kiss. Outside the school. Which is ... SHE IS SIXTEEN.

And also NOTHING. N O T H I N G about them, morality and ethics and general ick factor aside, merits a slow-mo jump kiss. THEY DO NOTHING. THEY WHINE. THEY ARE SO BORING.

My link froze so I won't see this episode's epilogue, though I never really watch those anyway.

[killingfrankie]

MY THOUGHTS ON THE OBC CAST RECORDING OF MEAN GIRLS.

‘A Cautionary Tale’: Honestly the best start to a musical ever. I’m obsessed with this song so much it’s insane. The little ‘nice’ from Damian and then ‘thank you’ from Janis after the ‘you can’t buy integrity from the mall’ line is SO SATISFYING. So good.

‘It Roars’: The transition into this song is so seamless and perfect and it’s so catchy. It shows how separated Cady is from society and it helps make sense of who she is, why she acts the way she does and how enthusiastic she is to finally join a more “normal community/society”. Does that make sense?. I am personally thankful that it was cut from the movie and replaced by ‘What Ifs’ because I just don't think it would’ve translated well. And that’s okay! Some things are better left untouched.

‘Where Do You Belong?’: “your mother called you babygirl?” “singing ha ha ha” SO GOOD. Damian is so funny. In the musical and the new movie Damian has so much more personality and more of a backstory and it’s so good. SO MAD THIS WAS CUT THOUGH. Grey slayed this song. The introduction to Damian and Janis for Cady. Perfect.

‘Meet The Plastics’: Silly silly Cady so so so curious. The way they describe the plastics in the beginning💀so funny. “MY NAME IS REGINA GEEEEORRRRRRRGE” LITERAL FUCKING CHILLS I LOVE TAYLOR LOUDERMAN. Her intro is so fucking real. HATE the 115 line tho. Thank goodness they changed it. Mad they cut karen and Gretchen’s parts from the movie tho 🙁 GRETCHEN’S VERSE IS SO GOOD BRO. straight and to the point. Karen’s intro is so funny. I love Karen. They could never make me hate her. “That’s it! :D” kate rockwell oh how i love you. WHEN ALL THEIR VERSES MERGE IS SO GOOD. i'm personally a Regina girl so I sing the ‘heeeeeres where you belong here's where you belong.’ “NO REALLY SAY IT.” SO GOOD. “come sit with us tomorrow! It’ll be fetch!”

‘Stupid With Love’: LOOOOOOVE. I used to not really like this song but it’s grown on me a lot and I love how unhinged Erika gets. “Do you have an eraser?” “i would love to :3” cadyyyyyyyy heroooonnnnnn. SO GOOD. “jinx!” “ha ^_^ IM ASTOUNDED AND NONPLUSSED. I AM FILLED WITH CALCULUST.” I LOVE HER. this song is so good. I also personally really like Angourie’s version too.

‘Apex Predator’: i can play this song on piano. SO GOOD. i love this song so much. Have you guys seen rachel zeglers cover? Cady using metaphors to present Regina’s behaviour and her power is so clever and it’s just so fun to listen to. When janis and cady both sing “she’s queen of beasts” THEY SOUND SO GOOD TOGETHER BRO. “HOW CAN YOU OUTSMAAAAARRRRRRRT THE APEX PREDATOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR”

‘What’s Wrong With Me?’: Gretchen :((( I feel like i cry to this song a lot. It’s just like, gretchen, honey, you dont deserve this.  “Mama called me beautiful. Dont believe her anymore, now im listening to you.” REGINA LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS SHE’S JUST A BABY😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 the final “WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME” AND SHE BELTS. SO GOOD. translated so well on screen.

‘Stupid With Love (Reprise)’: i’ve never been a big fan of aaron but i don’t have any issues with him but this is satisfying to listen to. “So i’m swearing off of dating.” “Shit.🥲” . “hey whats the date?” “october 3rd! MY NEW FAVOURITE DAY!”

‘Sexy’: KAREN I LOVE YOU. this song translates so well onto screen from stage. Kate slayed this song and so did avantika. I love how passionate karen is about halloween. This song is such a BOP too. The beat is so addicting. “I CAN BE” ateeee. She knows who she is and she SLAYED. When she lists the costumes. Chefs kiss. The whole sex cancer bit is so good. Thank you for curing sex cancer karen! “THIS IS MODERN FEMINISM TALKING. I EXPECT TO RUN THE WORLD IN SHOES I CANNOT WALK IN.” ICONIC. PERFECT. INCREDIBLE.

‘Someone Gets Hurt’: literal chills. Like actual goosebumps. “Yes i look perfect” yes you do. I can play this on guitar. SO FUCKING GOOD ISTG. so tense. I’d give in to her immediately. She’s so intoxicating i swear to god. This song captures regina SO WELL. there’s so many astonishing little vocal moments. Taylor louderman is literally one of my favourite vocalists of all time she’s so fucking good to listen to. The amount of emotion in her voice is incredible. “IT’S FINE FOR YOU IT’S FINE TO FLIRT. AND GOD YOU’RE HOT WHY DO YOU EVEN WEAR A SHIRT.” actually fucking insane i love her.

‘Revenge Party’: this song is so fun and actually batshit crazy i love it. It really shows how creative Janis and Damian are. This for me is where Cady turns for the worst. I hate the whole theme where they fuck with regina’s weight to take her down. It’s genuinely disgusting and thats one of my only problems with mean girls. Like ik they’re all mean girls but still. Gretchens whole meltdown is so fucking funny. I love gretchen so much. The final chorus is so fun.

‘Fearless’: gretchen not being able to function without having a “boss” is iconic but also someone get her a therapist. This song is so fun. Like all of them singing about not being scared of regina and then regina coming in and changing the song to the chords of SGH and then basically warning them that she will get them back. Again, CHILLS.

‘Stop’: MY FAV ATM. SO FUN. SO MAD THEY CUT IT FROM THE MOVIE. JAQUEL WOULD’VE SERVED. So catchy and addicting i love it so much. The “stop” before giving examples hits every time. “MY GOD GIRL, HE’S JUST A GUY!” SO TRUE!!! Janis calling out Damian about Phillip is so funny. Damian going insane over phillip is so funny. “For four whole weeks i trolled and dissed her. THEN I FOUND OUT SHE WAS HIS SISTER.” CRYING ITS SO FUNNY. Then all the girls saying their mistakes. It just gets gradually more sad. “Good work ladies lets take a break” A 5-6-7-8 ! “ TAP BREAK. ICONIC. Him calling her out by saying “stop. Being glued to your phone, counting followers and likes and IGNORING YOUR FRIENDS.” and then the. “She’s leaving! JUST LIKE MY DAD!” IS SO FUNNY.

‘What’s Wrong With Me? (Reprise)’: again with the “boss” :( also having mrs george in the reprise is so funny and it makes so much sense. Bless they’re both trying so hard. “You’ll be worshipped for years.. Then she’ll turn three and everything’s wrong with me” REGINA WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR MOTHER 😭😭

‘Whose House Is This?’: SO addicting and fun. “WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS? ITS MY HOUSE NOW.” im so thankful kevin kind of got a song. He’s so funny. “WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS?” “IT WAS ALWAYS MY HOUSE😭” SO FUNNY.

‘More Is Better’: am i the only one who thinks aaron kinda over-reacted here when he called cady a clone of regina… likeeeeee it’s not that deep bro. Also when it alludes to ‘i see stars’ is so cute. She’s JUST a girl. And she’s not wrong. Regina wouldn’t let that girl talk to him in a normal conversation. What else was she supposed to do? Aaron does have some points tho about how she’s changing herself to it in. but he shouldn’t be scrutinising her for it.. Like bro just reassure her that you like how she normally is… cutesy song tho

‘Someone Gets Hurt (Reprise)’: this entire sequence is genuinely insane and so fucking good and i am obsessed with barrett so much like she’s so talented. And Auli'i ate it up in the movie too.

‘World Burn’: GOOSEBUMPS. The start of this scene is so sad in the movie… TAYLOR LOUDERMAN ATE THIS SONG UP. not a fan of the use of the d slur tho. V happy they changed it for the movie. The intensity of this song makes me feel like im entering my villain era. “But you didnt finish my oooooofoffffff. MY NAME IS REGINA GEORGE.” CHILLS BRO CHILLS. “AND YOU CAN QUOTE THIS. WOAHOHOHOOOOOHHHOHHHH.” “MEAN. MEAN. MEEEEEEEEEEAN.” I LOVE HER BRO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND. “SOO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAN. I WANNA WATCH THE WORLD BURN.” I C O N I  C.

‘I’d Rather Be Me’: i can play this song on piano too. It’s so good. I love it so much. Probably my fav when i first watched the musical. My fav thing is the chanting of “janis janis janis janis” and it is so satisfying. Im sad they cut it from the movie. Janis’ redemption arc is so fucking good. Love a queen who will do anything to be authentically themself. “everyBODY has opinions but tht doesnt make them true.” i prefer the ‘every asshole’ from the movie but the everyBODY still hits.

‘Do This Thing’: “YO YO YO MATHLETES STATE CHAMPIONSHIPS, WHAT! FIRST FEMALE EVER ON THE TEAM, WHAT! A BOXED LUNCH WILL BE PROVIDED, WHAT!” SO FUCKING FUNNY BROOOOO. “I’m a lean, mean, math machine” okay cady. Whatever floats ur boat queen. That line kinda hits. The part where they’re solving equations hits so hard. Kevin is so funny. “YOU LIKE THAT MARYMOUNT?!?!” cady ate it up towards the end. This song is so good.

‘I See Stars’: this song is so cvnty i love it. It makes me lightheaded when i karaoke it though so god bless erika henningsen for doing it 8 times a week. This song is so cutesy i love it. The perfect ending. Cady’s redemption was so well written bro. And i love this song. Not my favourite but it’s still on my playlists.