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Gnashing of Teeth - Chapter 2
Previous // Next (tbd)
CW: pet-adjacent whump, instituzionalized slavery, nonconsensual fighting, fight scene, violence, blood, strangulation, non-con drug use
A/N: Detailed fight scenes are not my forte in writing (and I know they can be a bit boring to read), but they will not be frequently featured in this story. I felt that this one was necessary for setting the scene of the story, describing Sasha's mindset, and situating the reader to just what's at stake.
Sashaâs drug tests had come back clean. Of course they came back clean. They were smart when they dosed him, carefully timed around the fights he would be put in for, just enough days apart for his blood to come back pure.Â
Given the intensity of the prior dayâs workout routine, Sasha knew that he must have been a last-minute replacement for this bout. Maybe one of the other fighters hadn��t passed their blood test. Maybe theyâd had a rash of resistance and been forcibly subdued.Â
Maybe, as was common among Sashaâs kind, they had finally killed themselves.Â
âYou ready?â Bossâs voice spoke right into Sashaâs ear, the breath hot and rancid against his skin. If Sasha had been permitted any food in the last six hours, he knew he would have thrown it up. But he mustered the strength to answer rather than gag.
âYes, Boss.â The answer was pure reflex, nothing more. Just enough words to get Boss to back the fuck away.Â
Sasha tried to focus on the pounding in his chest, the angry heart that fluttered against his ribs, a side effect of the caffeine and other stimulants he had been force-fed hours prior. His eyes were fixed on the doors straight ahead. As soon as they opened he would be forced into the pit, and he would find himself face to face with another man - no, another thing - like himself.Â
His life depended on his strength.Â
Naked except for the collar around his neck and the tight black briefs that hugged his hips, Sasha struggled to control his breathing. Every part of his body was vibrating with the urge to fight, to let his bruised knuckles smash into flesh, his teeth wrap around any visible fingers or ears. He likewise anticipated the bloody thrill of his gums getting sliced open by his own teeth and nails scratching down his scarred forearms. Adrenaline flared and he rolled his shoulders back.Â
âAtta boy,â Boss said and smacked Sasha on his sweat-soaked shoulder. âYou get âem down and keep âem down, and weâll give you a rest day tomorrow.âÂ
âYes, Boss.â
That final promise of reprieve was always the sign it was just a few seconds away from go-time. Mere moments until the guillotine door would pull open and reveal the dirt pit with impossibly high walls, the crimson-splattered ground illuminated by blinding white lights. Spectators and bettors would cheer with unabashed bloodlust, always just out of sight behind the rails atop the walls. It was a cacophony of utter violence.Â
And just as Sasha let out a sharp puff of breath through his nose, the door lifted open.Â
Sasha rushed forward with a roar building in his throat, just as his handlers had taught him. Donât think, donât wait, donât hesitate. He ran until he collided with another body moving at almost the same speed, their flesh hitting with a sickening smack. That first moment was the only chance Sasha would get to size up his opponent before they attempted their first strike.Â
The other fighter was shorter, Sasha could tell just from the way their head had collided with his collarbone. But they also were broader, which he had determined the way that his own feet had slid back upon impact. As for strength he could only guess that they were about evenly matched. For a moment, Sasha swore he saw a glint of fury from blue eyes, but it could have just as easily been his imagination.Â
Sasha drew back his left fist and sunk it deep into the other fighterâs abdomen.Â
Boss liked Sasha to keep the fight on his feet for as long as possible, Boss said it made fighters look dignified as they pummeled their opponent. âPatrons donât pay top dollar to see two brutes wrestling with each other in the dirt.â Grapple holds and headlocks were the most effective way to win, but it was always more thrilling to see the loser sway on their feet before toppling unconscious to the ground. At least, thatâs what Sasha had been told in his training.Â
After assessing his opponent, and after landing the first blow, all rational thought left Sashaâs mind. He gave in to the bloodlust and anger that so often overpowered him. Nothing less than nuclear fury would get him through the end of this match, whether the match was seconds or minutes long, and he would be one day closer to earning his humanity back. He was going to be a winner, then he would go back to the showers and get the blood washed from his knuckles, and sleep for twelve hours.Â
It would be pure bliss.Â
The only thing Sasha could hear as he sunk fist after fist into his opponentâs sides was the rush of his own breathing. Deep, guttural, animal breaths. He was an animal now, after all. The transformation had taken place as soon as he stepped in the ring.Â
Warm liquid splattered across his face and he knew it was blood, but not his own. There was a spark of glee at the thought that he could win. The other fighter wasnât making as much contact, and hadnât yet landed a blow on Sashaâs face. Those training sessions had made Sashaâs instincts sharp enough to dodge uppercuts without a second thought.Â
Then they both went down in a tumble of limbs as the other fighter lost his balance. Sasha reflexively bucked his hips, as he intended to roll the other fighter so he could end up on top.Â
The other man tried to do the same, but he was too late. Sasha had already leaned forward and wrapped his teeth around their collarbone. This earned Sasha a ear-piercing shriek of pain before other teeth returned the favor, foreign enamel sinking into the skin above Sashaâs pectoral muscle. That was alright - so long as they were focused on biting, Sasha had the chance to move in for his finishing move.Â
Other fighters didnât like this method, Boss had said. They thought it was too inhumane. Sasha didnât mind. As soon as the fighter bit down, Sasha pulled them in close to his body and released his own bite hold. Now they were trapped close to his body, and being stuck on the ground, they didnât have even an inch of leverage. Then, and only then, did Sasha wrap his forearms tight around their throat.Â
This fighter released their bite hold immediately and fell back to using their nails, but they were flat against the dirt, pressed beneath Sashaâs full weight as his forearms pushed against their jugular. Now their adrenaline-filled body was being deprived of the oxygen it so desperately needed to keep going. The desperate squirming told Sasha that he was close, so he pressed harder, his own forehead almost against the ground. Blood and sweat made their exposed bodies slick against each other, and Sasha knew that this was as close as he would get to an embrace until his next match.Â
Blood thundered in his ears. Reality was starting to drift away as the wriggling form beneath him began to still, go limp, become little more than a prey animal. It wasnât human to begin with, was it? A growl mounted in Sashaâs throat and he put his whole weight into the maneuver, every pound of muscle meant to crush, crush, crush-
Instinct was cut short by electricity freezing him in place. Sashaâs lungs seized and he fell off the other fighter, now in the dirt next to them, and he writhed beneath the current and its familiar agony. When the sensation ended he was on his back, staring up at the spotlights, his chest rising and falling with every gasp. The buzzing in his ears faded, and he heard the roar of whistling and hollering from the stands above, the sound of satisfied spectators who had won their bets. Through the fuzz of animal instinct, Sasha felt a small hint of pride.Â
Heâd won again.Â
The victory was short lived as the catch pole tightened around his neck and hauled him to his feet. He struggled to go in the direction the handlers were pulling him, relying only on the tugging at his neck to guide him back to the darkness behind the door. Sasha still let out soft growls as he panted in spite of himself. Something in the pit was transformative, lighting his blood on fire with the urge to destroy.Â
That very instinct was why victors were subjected to the catch pole, a stick that secured them a solid ten feet from the handlers. This was the only safe way to pull amped-up fighters away from their opponent and back to their cages. It would take Sasha the better part of two hours to come down from the animalistic high of fighting, and in that time he was a liability even to the handlers that had conditioned his obedience.Â
When Sasha came to from the fugue of predatory bloodlust, he would be rinsed down and clothed. Severe wounds would be treated - often Sasha couldnât feel them until the pain set in hours later - and the others would be left to heal on their own. If he had won, they would also feed him dinner, and fulfill whatever other small comforts had been promised.Â
Darkness surrounded Sasha as he was pulled back into the tunnel and the doors to the pit shut behind him. He strained against the catch pole for just a moment when he thought he saw a silhouette, but another rough yank kept him moving forward.Â
âGuess you earned yourself the chance to sleep in,â a distant voice said.Â
Sasha only growled in response.
Taglist: @honeycollectswhump
#gnashing of teeth#whump#whumplr#whump community#whump writing#whump blog#mind the cws#sasha oc#Boss oc#I really feel like this scene drags#I am really bad at starting stories and getting the momentum going lol#anyway thanks for reading!#I appreciate every set of eyes on my work
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My Minecraft oc
So his name is Carnivoro and he is a boss (i didn't have any idea for names) he can spit acid and make "small" plants to attack the player (Steve) so, yes you can tame it only if you have a stack of steak (yes a stack (64)), also if your sword as an fire enchant it do much damage to it
#oc#plant#Carnivoro#carnivorous plants#minecraft#minecraft oc#minecraft oc boss#boss oc#minecraft boss#I LOVE IT SO MUCH#idk for his name
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Boss Masterlist
Bosslist?
Anyway... (This whole series is VERY DEAD DOVE.)
0: Prelude - CW: Suicide mention, poison mention, fear, whumper pov, sadistic whumper, war context, spy whumpee, captivity, guns, begging, honorifics, forced to strip, graphic threats (broken bones, amputations, mutilations), begging for death, dehumanization, mentioned past face whump, past eye whump, fate worse than death, bondage, noncon touching (not sexual), medical whump, justâŚa lot of suffering okay?
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I cleaned up some backgrounds for screenshot edit purposes would love to be linked if used just so I can see your art :3c
first batch (you are here!) | second batch | third batch | fourth batch | fifth batch | sixth batch | seventh batch (coming soon)
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Redrew another OC last night:
Just a big boss robot constructed by Doctor Fulgur - the Iridescent Goliath!
Big inspiration taken from the devil-robots from the RockMan/Megaman franchise.
(originally I named this 'bot the Iridescent Titan, but I renamed it to Goliath since Titan is a term to refer to my kaiju "pantheon" now.)
#yellow devil#art#digital art#robot oc#robot monster#slime monster#rainbow colours#oc#character reference#character design#artist on tumblr#antagonist oc#boss oc#boss monster
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I'm getting a little too worked up over Boss.
Imagine being the yakuza boss' beloved Darling. He's always in a good mood, always relaxed. Nothing seems to startle him. You sometimes think it's foolish for someone in his shoes to be this careless. But then you remember this man has murdered his way to the very top. He doesn't take shit from anyone. People follow him like obedient dogs out of fear and admiration, because they know he's the real deal. They know he'd take a bullet for them without a second of hesitation.
And now you're in his care. He's almost afraid to handle you, too frail and precious compared to someone like him.
"Are you sure it's safe to be seen together?" you ask, fidgeting in his lap.
"Hmm? Did Kazuya put nonsense in your head again? Let me guess, something about you getting me in trouble, being kidnapped, used as leverage, all that crap?"
You shake your head hesitantly. He grabs your chin, gentle yet firm. His fingers are harsh, save for the prosthetic one.
"Miss, have you forgotten who you're dealing with? Do you think I'd let anyone touch you? Answer me."
You can only nod. Itâs not indifference and foolishness that you see, but the confidence of a man who is aware nothing can get past him.
#yandere#yandere yakuza#yakuza x reader#yandere x reader#yakuza boss#eiji ichiji#mafia x reader#yandere imagine#yandere oc
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Satan your staff is dumb af đđĽ
#Helluva Boss#helluva#Helluva Boss Satan#satan helluva boss#satan#helluva boss yogirt#yoguirt helluva boss#yoguirt#helluva boss oc#oc#oc art#helluva boss fanart#helluva boss fandom#MarComie_
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I PARTICIPATED IN HELLUVA BANG 2024 AND GOT TO MAKE ART FOR CKATMYLA'S EPIC FIC "cure for a clown"!!! (this was drawn before we got the official belphagor design btw haha)
GO CHECK IT OUT! was sm funđđđ
#my art#helluva bang 2024#helluva boss#helluvaboss#helluva boss fanart#fizzmodeus#fizzarozzie#asmodeus helluva boss#asmodeus#ozzie helluva boss#ozzie#helluva boss asmodeus#helluva boss ozzie#blitz helluva boss#blitzø#helluva boss blitz#blitzo#lucifer hazbin hotel#lucifer#hazbin hotel lucifer#helluva boss oc
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been normal over Pressure guard OC's with my friends :] silly AU that lives rent-free in my brainnn
characters featured belong to me, @allbically, pink, seth, and zerum
#who belongs to who? lmao#pressure#roblox pressure#pressure ocs#my ocs#friend's ocs#BUDDY HAS MANY FRIENDS NOW YAY!!!#and a situationship with his boss#made use of blender to make the bgs so i could paint over themm
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vs The Hellsiren (Chapter 4 Secret Boss)
#sorry about the bad quality#tumblr wouldn't let me upload the bigger gif#beltrowel#the hellsiren#noelle holiday#kris dreemurr#ralsei#deltarune#deltarune au#andromedia chapters#deltarune oc#deltarune secret boss#pixel art#my art
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uhh...he's right behind me, isn't he?
(tried to pull this joke in cosplay with @ingo-ingoing-ingone at ALA as they were handing out missing posters, but nobody really got it dfhsgdhs)
#submas#subway boss emmet#ingo and emmet#warden ingo#fanart#not oc#this was originally a drawing that looked more like blue and me which is why ingo is taller than emmet#but i changed it bc i wasn't liking how it was looking#so just pretend he's standing on a step or something GSJDHGSHJ#missing poster is based off the ones that blue printed off to hand out to people lol#some of you may even have one!
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Stayed Gone⌠but itâs Lucifer & Satan đđ
#hazbin#hazbin hotel#hellaverse#hazbin art#hazbin lucifer#lucifer#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel lucifer#pride#wrath#satan#helluva#helluva boss#helluva fanart#helluvaverse#helluvaboss#helluva boss fanart#helluva boss art#helluva boss oc#stayed gone#artists on tumblr#my art#sins#7 deadly sins#seven deadly sins#mastermind#helluva boss mastermind#helluva boss season 2#mastermind helluva boss
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I Want You to Stay (14) - FINALE (JJK)
Pairing:Â Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption; arts, business/property devt, and book publishing talk thatâs probably inaccurate; mentions of trauma & family drama; lots of fluff; explicit sexual content (lots of making out, oral (m & f receiving), body praise, un/protected sex)  (18+)
Chapter Word count:Â 32.8k
Series Masterlist
Status:Â Complete
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isnât the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesnât smile, he doesnât appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesnât help that heâs incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. Youâve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
Playlist đś: on the way home
A/N: And then it ends! Please bear with the length of this final chapter - it felt right to finish the series with all this đ¤ This was so satisfying to write despite the emotional roller coaster, and I just want to thank you for sticking with me through this and showing me/it so much love. It's a fanfic writer bucket list of mine to write boss JK! I hope you enjoy! 𼰠Like I've said before, I have plans for season 2, but I don't know if I'll actually be able to write it so đ¤đ˝
And like always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight for listening to me talk about this for months. đ
##Â
Your heavy eyes flutter open before they close again, and for the briefest moment, you think you see Jungkook smiling at you, his doe eyes gazing at your sleeping form. You do it again, and right after your eyes fall shut, you feel soft lips on your bare shoulder, his warm breath heating your shivering body.Â
His absence causes you to quiver, but youâre too tired to move. Even if you werenât, you probably wouldnât be able to pull the covers over you, not when you have the said man leaving kisses down your spine and then back up to peck on your exposed cheek. Yet no matter how tempting it is to return them, your mind decides it just needs a bit more time to wake up, and so does your sore body that feels like it ran a marathon that you just werenât trained for.
Because much as you took on Jungkookâs challenge last night about being able to have sex all night, as it turns out, youâre the one who couldnât do it.
He first had you on top of him, kneading your ass and directing your movements while he pounded on you from below. The way he felt from that angle had your stomach in knots, and when he wrapped his arms around you to keep you steady while he tried to go deeper as he sucked and licked your neck, you were a goner.Â
You were on your back before you knew it. And while he aided you in coming down from your high through languid kisses and licks on your mouth, it wasnât long before he had you keening again. His tongue lapped up your folds and swirled around your sensitive nub, and despite your mind feeling numb by then, your cunt throbbed for him. It wasnât long before he was inside you again, thrusting into you fervently before slowing the pace and taking you more gently.Â
The way he grunted as you whispered for him to come suddenly rings in your mind. Coupled with his morning kisses all over your body, you moan in pleasure, and he hasnât even done much yet.Â
Perhaps itâs also because of these luxurious Egyptian cotton sheets that are making you feel like youâre in heaven. Or the fact that they smell so good, too, like fresh laundry but more delicate, and all you want is to drown in this softness. So you do something close and bury your face on the pillow while you remain flat on your belly. You take a deep breath and release it with another moan.
âSounds like someone slept well, huh?â You hear him chuckle, his mouth now detaching from your skin.Â
âYou tired me out, Jungkook,â you hum, your eyes still closed as you bask in the comfort of his bed. âWhy are you even awake?â
âBecause I always wake up early. And itâs past 10,â he reasons. âI went for a run then hit the gym. I figured youâd be awake by now and well⌠you arenât.â
âIââ
Your mind slightly catches some life as you hear that heâd just done a workout, so you take a peak and the sight doesnât disappoint. He stands by the bedside with only his track pants on, his hands in his pockets with damp hair while he looks on as you slowly twist and turn on the bed.Â
âIââ you repeat.
âYou donât have to get up if you donât want to. Iâm sorry I woke you,â he says softly.Â
You catch on to his apologetic tone and itâs what forces you awake. You know heâs used to starting his day early and you⌠youâre used to burying yourself in your bed until you have to get up to eat. Having someone to spend your days with is probably something youâre both gonna have to start getting used to.
Your eyes finally open and stay that way, and despite his sweat having dried already, Jungkook still looks like heâs glowing against the late morning sun thatâs shining through his bedroom window. You shift yourself and sit up, suddenly hyper aware of how naked you are⌠in his bedroom, and for a brief moment, you think it was all in your head.Â
With the sheets finally covering your body, you look at him, prompting him to sit on the edge of the bed and smile at you. You take his hand and caress the fingers that held you, that gave you pleasure, that traced patterns on your skin that you feel are now etched in its memory.Â
âLast night wasnât a dream,â you utter, as if proclaiming it to the universe, as if claiming this reality for yourself.Â
âIt better not be,â he laughs, softening when you do. âYou, uh, you found me.â
âWell, you did tell me where to go,â you point out.
âYes, unlike you,â he counters, recalling how your letter had just told him to find you with no instructions of where.
Your pout makes him laugh and itâs the sweetest sound youâve ever heard, one you didnât know when youâd hear again. But you give him a pass because heâs right, and all you want to do is make it up to him for making these past few weeks quite unbearable.
But he gets to you first, as he kisses your cheek. Thereâs adoration mixed with shyness in his eyes and tenderness with his every touch. You wouldnât say itâs something you didnât expect despite his usual detachment, but it strikes you just how much of this softness has been hiding underneath. Youâve seen him be protective of you and be caring, but this side of him is new. You suppose being mellow and giggly comes naturally once heâs allowed himself to be vulnerable and open up. Maybe itâs also just a result of last nightâs events.
He removes the strands of your hair that had stuck to your face, and it dawns on you again that itâs morning and you had indeed just woken up. You whine that youâve got crusty eyes and morning breath so you create some distance, but he just laughs and says he doesnât care one bit.
âYouâre pretty even in the morning,â he adds.
Jungkook watches you nibble your lips as you try to suppress a smile that you make anyway. When youâre bold about what you want from him, something inside him stirs, a certain kind of desire that explodes because he wants to fulfill your need, to make you feel good, to let you know that you affect him the same way.Â
But when youâre shy the way you are right now, as if youâre still trying to wrap your head around your new reality with him, giggling and grinning like a schoolgirl with a crush, he wants to just hold you in his arms and keep you there. Something softens in him because you - strong and stubborn you - gets flustered because of him. The competent and confident woman he knows suddenly doesnât know what to say when he calls her pretty, which heâs glad heâs able to verbalize now. It used to be a thought that just constantly rang in his head, but one he tried so hard to quell. He gets to say it to you with confidence from now on and heâll be able to say it everyday.Â
Once your face settles with a comfortable smile, he sighs in contentment, once again feeling like that dark cloud that hovered over him for years has gone away. Things used to feel so heavy as he wandered around an unknown place he's been in for so long, not knowing where to go. Itâs as if the days just passed him by and heâd forgotten how he spent them because there wasnât really much that he looked forward to.Â
Now he does, and he realized it when he woke up this morning and found you lying next to him. You were in deep sleep with your lips just slightly parted. Your hands were curled under your chin as you laid on your side, and there was this calmness on your face that gave him so much relief.Â
He felt light; he felt the darkness subside, too, and the unknown place heâd been wandering about suddenly looked familiar, yet it was still somehow new. There was that feeling of safety, of clarity, like he could do or be anything with you around. Those were things you gave him when you were still his assistant, and he gets to feel them again now that youâre so much more than that.Â
âWhat?â You ask, nudging him with your foot as he briefly zones out just thinking about all the things he wants to do with you.Â
âI was just savoring the look of you being flattered,â he hums. âItâs kinda cute.â
âOh shush,â you laugh. âIâm just not used to it.â
âWell, itâs not like I could just say youâll looked pretty when I was still your boss,â he points out.Â
âTrue,â you nod. âGood thing you arenât anymore, then.â
âExactly. So youâre just gonna have to get used to it.â
He looks at you as if itâs a warning, and you feel the heat rush to your cheeks.
âNoted, Mr. Jeon,â you whisper to tease.
âFuck,â he groans. âI want to kiss you right now.â
âDonât tell me that turned you on!â You gasp, giggling now as he shakes his head.
âOnly if you say it like that!â He whines, the sultry tone of your voice echoing in his ears. âYou know what, Iâm gonna take a shower.â
âAnd Iâm gonna brush my teeth so you can kiss me all you want!â
âIâm gonna have to get used to that, too,â he smiles.
âWell, itâs not like I could say that to you when I was still your assistant,â you repeat his words.
âAnd good thing you arenât anymore, Ms. Cho,â he laughs, not wanting to get carried away right now.
You laugh as well before he leaves to take a shower. You give yourself this quiet time on your own to process where you are at this moment. Youâre in a room you used to enter everyday, and your mere glances made you curious about what Jungkook kept in his personal space.Â
Youâre here now, and you see that thereâs really not much, other than a floor-to-ceiling window, a television, a bar cart, and a couch. Heâs got an interesting light fixture and abstract art on the wall. His decorative pieces consist of small sculptures and framed buildings, but there are no photos or other mementos. You suppose heâs not really the type, and that just makes you hope that you can help him add a bit of personal touch so that his room could feel more comfortable, or maybe add a bit of warmth to an otherwise cold, monochromati space. You decide thatâs something youâll eventually figure out.Â
You take your phone from the bedside and finally reply to your mom and your friends with more details about last night. You merely told them that you and Jungkook have made up, but itâs just today that youâre telling them how it happened.Â
He converted the archives section to a childrenâs library, you say in your message. Found him in his office, we talked, and I spent the night at his place. Thatâs all for now. Iâll talk to you soon.
Soominâs barrage of excited curses is immediate. Jimin says heâs happy for you. And your mom sends you a heart emoji and tells you to stay happy.
You send a message to Yoongi, too, saying that you found Jungkook and that now you can learn what your heart is capable of. You thank him again, even if you know that those words will never be enough.
Standing from the bed, you head to the bathroom to finally wash up, thinking that itâll take a while more before Jungkook finishes. You brush your teeth as you face the mirror, seeing his silhouette behind the frosted glass of the shower enclosure from the reflection. He exits before you finish, and you slow your movements once he comes into view, naked and all wet, and somehow even more breathtakingly handsome than usual.Â
You try to act unbothered as you wash your face, only glancing up to see him with a towel around his waist and another one that he uses to dry his hair. The flex of his tattooed arm brings back memories from last night when it was propped up on your side, supporting his body while he thrusted relentlessly inside you. You gripped that arm when he went deeper, and it was the same one that held you when you started drifting off to sleep.Â
He stands behind you and gives you a boyish smile before wrapping his arms around your waist. You jerk a little in surprise but soften when his chin rests on your shoulder, and the way he looks comfortable and content has your heart soaring at this side of him - bold and vulnerable as he expresses the things he feels for you in action.
âCan I do this?â He asks as he buries his face in your neck.
âJungkook, weâve done a lot in the last 12 hours,â you remind him. âWhy are you asking permission to hug me?â
âI just donât want to overwhelm you.â
You turn around to face him and look at him questioningly, unable to follow. Youâd think that given all that youâve both done, simple affection like this is far from overwhelming.Â
âWhat I mean is⌠Sex is sex. With you, itâs meaningful and intimate. Weâre so lost in the feeling of desire and all that but thisâŚâ he says, wrapping your arms around him as if to explain. âThis⌠this is a different kind of intimate. Waking up next to each other, morning kisses, random hugs⌠they say something else.â
âAnd that is?â You ask after a beat of silence, needing that quiet to take in his words.
âThat I want you beyond all that lust and that high,â he answers. âAnd this⌠This takes more from us. And I know that because this used to scare me. This⌠I donât know, vulnerability I guess? Having someone next to me while I sleep, being the first thing they see in the morning, doing ordinary things with them like taking a shower or something. Holding their hand. Hugging them because it just feels right. I donât know if Iâm making sense butââ
âYou are,â you interject, knowing exactly what he means.Â
You used to say how you were intimate with the men you dated but you couldnât say that you shared intimacy with them. It was such an abstract concept for you. That familiarity, that emotional connection, that feeling of safety and belongingness, and of certainty and clarity seemed so intangible.Â
Thereâs a reason why you never had them over at your place, why you could sleep and wake up next to them in their homes but prefer to spend the rest of the day by yourself or with your friends. Thereâs a reason why you were cautious about the personal things you shared, about your dreams and fears, why you never let them close enough to know how to love you. Something was always lacking and a part of that was because you never allowed yourself to give them more than what they could touch. Your body was as far as they could go; your heart was a restricted place that no one could enter.
Until Jungkook, and suddenly that intimacy is something tangible. You can feel it when his arms are around you, you can hear it in his giggles, you can see it in his smile, you can smell it as he stands a breath away, and you can taste it in his mouth, one that welcomes you in when you kiss him tenderly. You know thereâll be more ways that it will be tangible to you, that itâll be something real and definite, something your mind could at least try to grasp. And heâs right - doing this takes more from you than sex for the sake of it ever could.Â
Youâre letting someone into a place youâve kept to yourself for so long. And that itself could be quite disorienting and overwhelming. He gets it because itâs something heâs probably done before, and heâs doing it again now.
You tell him with the way you kiss him that you get it, too. You tell him by the way you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer that thatâs where you want him, and that heâs settled in your heart so suddenly yet so certainly that you donât want him to go anywhere.Â
Youâre content with this. You feel your need for pleasure heighten, you feel that slight throbbing of your cunt and the need for friction, you feel that desire course through your veins but youâre satisfied with this intimacy you share. You say it with how tenderly your fingers graze his face, with how your hand gently rests on his bare chest, and with how your movements remain slow, focused on the feel of him more than anything else.
He understands your contentment, too, and he says it with how he follows your pace, with how he softly palms your bare thighs, and with how he nibbles your lips in affection. You both pull away to get some air but he tells you, too, through his soft kisses on your cheeks and your forehead before a final one on your nose that this is enough, and that right now, this is all he needs.Â
âI bought breakfast,â he tells you as he takes your hand in his then leads you out of the bathroom. He grabs a pair of shorts from his closet while you watch on. âI got those street toasts and some pastries. Iâll warm them up and heat the coffee. Is that okay?â
âOf course,â you respond, giddy at the thought that he bought those for you. You mentioned in passing last night that youâve missed eating them after being at your momâs place for much of the week. âYou still donât have anything in your fridge or your pantry.â
âExactly. So uh, I was thinking we could go do some groceries today and I can make something for you for a change, and no, the eggs on toast that one time donât count.â
Youâre endeared by the shy look on his face, and itâs not really one you can say no to.Â
âSure, that would be nice,â you smile.Â
âI was hoping youâd, uh, stay the night again. And again. I canceled work for the team on Monday but I have to meet Hoseok and my father. Maybe I should cancel that, too.â
âAnd tell them, what? That youâre gonna be with me?â You chuckle. âThatâs not happening. This⌠this canât come between you and your job, okay?â You remind him, as you donât want your newly formed relationship to negatively affect him, especially after all the work heâs done to be what he is now. âWork comes first. Iâll always understand.â
âIt goes both ways,â he hums, as he sets the food in front of you. âSo, when do you start your new job?â
âNext Monday,â you answer. âWhich reminds me⌠I have to shop for trousers and dresses.â
âSo, a wardrobe change, huh?â He asks, placing the cup of coffee and glass of water on the table before taking the seat next to you.Â
âSort of. The pencil skirts feel restrictive. Plus, every time we ate out, I was always scared that the zipper would pop or something,â you laugh.Â
âIt always felt odd that that was the recommended outfit for assistants,â he says. âI liked them on you though⌠respectfully speaking.â
You playfully shake your head at his statement, but he defends that they always paired well with your pastel-colored blouses that he claims bring out the color of your eyes.Â
âWell, Iâll still be using those. I just need to pair them with something else less formal.â
âWe can go shopping today then,â he suggests. âNot unless thatâs something you want to do on your own. I understand if it is. I mean, I⌠I donât want to impose. I⌠I didnât even ask you what you wanted to do today.â
âI didnât really have anything in mind. My weekends are usually just spent doing chores and errands or watching stuff at home or in my local theater,â you say. âNot unless my friends visit or I go home. Other than that I just⌠do whatever I feel like on my own. And you? What do you usually do on weekends?âÂ
âWork, gym, drink, watch sports, sleep,â he chuckles, recalling those days of loneliness and nothingness, which really wasnât that long ago. âMeet my parents if I have to, hang out with my friends if Iâm in the mood.â
âAnd go to the clubs?â You cock an eyebrow.Â
âYeah, I guess,â he hums, knowing what youâre alluding to. âI do it less frequently now, though. I just go there to catch up with them then I go home. Donât you do that, too?â
âOnly when Jimin and Soomin are here. Socialite stuff, you know?â You explain.
âI guess,â he shrugs. âBut we can do anything you want today. Itâs up to you.â
âOkay, then shopping it is,â you smile at him, thinking itâs something fun that you could do together.Â
You think anything with him would be, and it excites you to know that many of the things you used to do alone is something you could now share and do with him. Maybe you could even do something new, like some outdoor activity or go to the arcades or even do a ghost tour just because.
But something ordinary like going to the groceries and shopping for new clothes are things you want to experience with him, too. Theyâre those intimate acts that he talked about earlier - simple and mundane, yet special and comfortable.Â
As you watch him in his plain shirt and shorts with his legs spread out as he sits on the chair beside you, and with him asking if youâre full and if thereâs anything else you want, you think about all the days youâd spent on your own. There was always a certain kind of peace you felt then; you were alone but you werenât lonely.Â
There were days when it got to you though, as you thought that it was probably nice to have someone to share a meal with, to laugh with as you watched your variety shows, and to lay next to as you talked about your day. You dwelled on the scenes that played in your head only briefly, knowing that there wasnât anyone in your life then that you wanted to do those simple, mundane things with.Â
But with Jungkook here with you now, sharing those with someone does seem to require a level of vulnerability you hadnât really thought about. Youâre letting him in a space thatâs always just had you in it, doing things that gave you peace, that gave you energy, that gave you those bits of happiness. Heâll no longer just be getting a peek into the world you carved for yourself; heâll now truly be a part of it. And you want him to know that even if it may seem like itâs overwhelming, you welcome him completely.
âWhat you said earlier about not wanting to overwhelm me,â you start, âI⌠I appreciate that. This isnât just a new side of you Iâm experiencing. This is also a new side of myself that Iâm getting to know, that Iâm going to get used to.â
âI know. And I understand that,â he responds, turning to face you now. âPeople bring out parts of ourselves that we didnât know we had. Or forgotten we had.â
âI guess. Iâve just⌠Iâve just never had a proper relationship before, you know? Iâve dated people but there were sides of me I didnât wanna show, and there were things that I couldnât really bring myself to do.â
âSuch as?â
âLingering,â you say after a beat of silence. âLittle forms of affection that you mindlessly do,â you continue, fiddling with his fingers. âAnd meeting the parents. That was always too much for me.â
âWell, youâve met mine,â he points out. âYou knew them before you even knew me.â
Thereâs no bitterness in his voice but youâre reminded of the secret you kept, and that itâs something you still havenât really acknowledged.
âIâm sorry about keeping that from you,â you bow your head. âI didnât plan on deceiving you or anything. And I didnât think it mattered. It only did once I started liking you. And I got too caught up with what I felt that I didnât tell you right away.â
âHey, you had your reasons,â he nudges your knee so youâd look at him. You look up and see the softness in his eyes. âAnd Iâll never fault you for them. You did what you had to do and Iâm just glad you stayed long enough for us to meet again. I admit I⌠I thought that maybe you mistook your feelings for loyalty. That you cared because you thought you had to. And Iâm sorry I did.â
âYou had your reasons, too,â you answer. âAnd Iâm sorry thatâs what you thought after I kept it all from you. But it wasnât hard to care about you, Jungkook,â you smile now. âWhat was hard was stopping myself from doing so. Even your parents noticed that. I guess I donât have to prove that to them anymore. Iâd like to think that with all the talks I had with your father, they already approve of me being with their son.â
His shy smile makes you feel giddy, as he bites his lip and the little dip on his cheek turns up.Â
âWell, I hope that your mom approves of me being with her daughter after that one talk with her,â he says worriedly.Â
âAfter expressing your feelings for me like that? Of course she does,â you giggle. âShe told me not to go back to the house unless Iâm with you so⌠yes, she definitely approves.â
âThatâs a relief. I mean, after everything I put you through?â
His face falls a little and youâre starting to learn that he needs assurance every once in a while. So you give it to him, as you surprise him by sitting on his lap and cupping his face with your hands.Â
âWe put each other through a lot but weâre together now,â you remind him. âWeâre done with being idiots.â
âWe are,â he chuckles, agreeing with Yoongi and Mr. Ri who fondly and frustratingly called you that. âBut your mother might be serious about not welcoming you back there until Iâm with you so letâs schedule that trip, okay? Maybe I could meet her husband, too?â
âTheyâre not actually married,â you sigh, shifting so that youâre leaning on his chest now. âTheyâve been together for over 10 years and Min-woo has even proposed but she doesnât think marrying is necessary. Theyâre committed, theyâre happy, she treats Yoon-chae and Yeo-jin like her daughters. This⌠this family is all they need, not a marriage. Plus, itâs quite expensive to do that and sheâs just being practical.â
 âDo you agree with her?â
âI guess,â you shrug. âI mean, what else is stronger than love? Than committing your whole self to that person?â
âCommitting the rest of your life to them,â Jungkook responds.
He knows itâs not easy though. Heâd seen his parents drift apart but he also saw them stand by each other after all that. Maybe they had to because thatâs what commitment means - itâs an obligation, a duty; it gives the person no choice but to stay. But then again, after speaking to them more regularly these past weeks, heâs seen their little acts of care and support for each other, of understanding and trust. Perhaps commitment is also that devotion, that promise and constancy, that tangibility of connection and permanence. Â
âMaybe,â you hum. âI think itâs just a fear that she never really got over. Her parents divorced. My biological father had plans of marrying her only to leave before I was born. She says she doesnât want to taint what she already has with Min-woo over some symbolic act thatâs hurt her twice before. And I donât blame her. Things hurt us and then⌠we just get scared. Itâs human nature, I think.â
âThatâs true. I⌠Iâm proof of that,â he whispers, as if in shame.Â
âSo am I,â you utter, shifting now so you can look at him again in assurance. âIt wasnât even my pain I carried; it was hers. But that still kept me from accepting good things. I was scared to open myself up, I was scared to loveâŚâ
Love. Itâs a foreign word to you in the context of romance. Itâs something that seemed easy to understand but you realized that feeling it isnât. Nor is finding it. You know youâve never felt anything like how Jungkook makes you feel, and you wonder if love is something like this, and if itâs something that he feels, too.
âI get it,â he looks away. âItâs not easy to do nor is it easy to take. You never know if youâre good enough for it or if you deserve it. I learned that the hard way, and I still donât think IâŚâ he trails, shaking his head, as if itâs too much or too soon for him to say.Â
You suppose it is. You donât know much about his relationships but you do remember Taehyung mentioning an ex-girlfriend before, someone whom Jungkook seemed to have loved so much, given the heartbreak he suffered through after the breakup. You wonder if heâll ever talk about her, or if it even matters. Heâs already let you in, and you donât want to give him a reason to shut you out or feel like youâre intruding. Your relationships are hard to talk about, too, not because they hurt you but because you feel ashamed of them. There are crevices in your heart that you want to leave untouched; you suppose that so does he.
âItâs okay,â you tell him, hoping heâd look at you again.Â
He eventually does, the softness on his face returning when you tell him you understand. He nods and smiles, pulling you close for a languid kiss, his grip on your waist tightening as you match his slow place.Â
Jungkook feels you smile against his lips. Whatever heaviness he felt earlier as he talked about love, something heâs been afraid to have again after he shunned it away, disappears.Â
Thatâs what kissing you does to him, heâs learning now. It makes the pain hurt less. It makes him forget about his burdens. It makes him feel something he hasnât in a long time. It makes him hope that heâs capable of doing right by you this time.Â
And with how you hug him tightly after you pull away to breathe, he knows that kissing you gives him that strength to face whatever it is heâs still afraid of, and that youâll stand by him until heâs ready.
You watch Jungkook from next to your closet as you wear your slip-on dress, a practical outfit given your shopping plans this afternoon. Youâve gone back to your apartment for a change of clothes and to bring some back to his place, and you left him in your living room as you packed your stuff from several meters away.Â
He stands by your couch, hands in his pockets as he looks at your photos on the shelf. He has a faraway look in his eyes, one thatâs different from the times he zones out and temporarily escapes to somewhere in his head. You wonder what specific photo heâs focused on and what heâs thinking, so you walk over to him and stand on his side.Â
Itâs the one of you in your uniform during your first day at your new school in Busan. You donât remember much from that day but your mom said you were shy to make friends. She told you that she was going to just be around because she worked there, too. You smiled just like she asked as she knelt down next to you while a moment marking your new life in a new town was being memorialized.Â
You donât recall taking that many pictures growing up but apparently she did, as she gave you a box of them when you moved back to Seoul on your own. They were all memories from a past you either couldnât remember or tried hard to forget, but somehow she kept the good ones, perhaps to remind you that in the midst of all that nightmare, she did her best to keep you safe and happy.
âYou have your motherâs smile,â Jungkook says. âItâs very warm and encouraging. I get it now, why my father thought you were just like her. Youâve always had this tenderness ever since you were young.â
âI guess,â you hum. âWhoâd know the pain underneath all that, right?â
âIâm sorry for what you had to go through,â he turns to you, feeling that tinge of pain in recalling what you experienced as a child.Â
âAnd Iâm sorry for what it did to your family,â you sigh, an apology that took you this long to give.
âIt wasnât your fault,â he responds, turning his gaze back to the photo. âI let the resentment get to me. I guess⌠my parents didnât deserve that.â
âIt doesnât change the fact that you were hurt, Jungkook. Your parents will always carry that with them. But they⌠they saved us. They helped us get away,â you remind him.Â
âI know. You get to be next to me because of them and that⌠thatâs helped me alot,â he admits. âIt helped me understand and forgive.â
âThatâs good. Iâm sure that means everything to them.â
Thereâs silence as his eyes remain focused on the photo, and you wonder what else heâs thinking, if thereâs anything else heâs sorry or thankful for.
âIâm trying so hard to remember meeting you that day,â he finally says, with a hint of desperation in his voice. âIâve buried so many memories and this is the one I wish I kept but I⌠I canât because itâs gone. I hate that it is.â
âIâve been trying to remember you, too,â you respond. âI almost didnât believe my mom when she said that weâve met before. She never told me about it but she said it slipped her mind. It was a long time ago and so much happened that day. Seeing you with that chocopie triggered that memory, I guess. We donât really talk about that time anymore. And I hate that itâs buried somewhere in my mind. But itâs a nice thought, isnât it?â You turn to him. âWe met all those years ago and we never knew. But I kept you with me in the form of a dessert that I still absolutely love, that I eat whenever Iâm sad or alone or upset. Connections arenât fleeting, Iâm sure of it now. Youâre proof of that.â Â
He returns your look, one of sadness but acceptance. Itâs one of those things youâre both going to have to deal with, as all the truths about your past come to light. You hope you can just focus on the good things from now on, and with how his lips slowly turn up in a smile, you think that so does he.
âThatâs true,â he hums. âYou stuck it out for me without even knowing. Thatâs⌠thatâs pretty special.â
âIt is,â you say, wrapping your arms around his waist for a hug and hearing him release a breath when you do. He returns the affection immediately, and realizing that itâs something you both naturally give to and receive from each other makes you smile. âItâs as if there was some invisible string that kept pulling me towards you. Itâs kinda stubborn like me, I think.â
Itâs a thought you hold close to your heart. Youâre not really one who believes in fate, but with Jungkook, itâs easy to fall into it. You canât help but think that beyond the debt you felt you had to pay, you unknowingly stayed in the company for another reason, and perhaps thatâs so you could meet him and remember it this time.Â
You held out so you could build something with him, so you could learn to want to be free, and then want it enough to finally put yourself first. Youâre only able to be with him because of that choice, and despite what it took for you to get here, itâs that same string thatâs keeping you from regretting all your decisions.Â
He responds with a soft kiss on your lips, one that you quickly melt into. The tender moment is slightly disrupted when he kneads your ass, something youâre also learning heâs quite fond of doing, causing you to yelp in surprise and laugh in response. But he just giggles and says he canât help it. He buries his face in your neck, the feel of him so close warming your insides as he seems to crave that proximity, too.
His phone ringing prompts him to pull away, and you let him go once he greets his mother on the other line.Â
âHello, my dear,â she chirps. âHow are you feeling today? Your father told me that you left the Arts Center quite early last night.â
âUh, yeah, I did,â he hums, sitting on the couch now while he watches you finish your packing. âI was just tired from all the socializing.â
âI understand. I can imagine how exhausted you must feel. Were you able to get some rest?â
âSort of,â he answers, smiling internally at how the night went.Â
Sure, there was a bit of rest, if he counts the four hours of sleep he had because he just couldnât get enough of you. Even when he was spent from all that you did, heâd just take you in his arms and all you had to do was smile at him or softly kiss his lips and then he wanted to go another round.Â
He supposes that all the built-up tension and months of holding himself back had just exploded, and he wants every opportunity he could have to show you how much you mean to him.
âWell, even then, I was hoping youâre free for dinner tonight,â his mother says. âThink of it as a celebration now that your big project is completed.â
âI, uh, Iâm kinda busy tonight,â he responds. âMaybe we can have dinner another time?â
âWhat else could you possibly be busy with this time?â She asks, but she doesnât sound offended.Â
Thereâs a tone of acceptance in her voice. Jungkook knows sheâs used to this, but he doesnât want this to continue being a norm. He genuinely wants to make time for them, and itâs something you encouraged him to do, too. But heâs still caught up with his new reality with you, so he decides to be honest instead.
âBeing with ___,â he admits. âWe finally talked and we, uh, we spent the night together. And weâre going out today.â
âOh, thatâs amazing news,â she sighs in relief. âYour father can breathe easy now. And he can finally claim to be a matchmaker,â she chuckles.
Jungkook hears his old man in the background say that it took 20 years but heâll take it.
âIs he next to you?â Jungkook laughs.Â
âHe is,â she responds. âHe said he saw ___ last night and she was looking for you, but he wasnât sure how to ask you how it went. So he asked me to invite you to dinner and see if you had plans and well, weâre glad you do.â
âYeah, we just have a lot to make up for,â he explains, glancing at you. âIf you were serious about a celebratory dinner then we can have it another day. Is that okay?â
âOf course, my dear,â she responds. âWhat about next weekend?â
âIâll confirm with her and let you know.â
âAlright, son. Well, we donât want to keep you,â his mother says. âYou and ___ have a good day, okay? Weâll see you soon.â
You watch Jungkook smile through the conversation with his parents, something you assume hasnât happened in years. Itâs nice to see him slowly start to mend their relationship. And though you want him to spend time with them, you also canât help but want to have him all to yourself, and staying in where he promised to cook you his speciality for dinner is how you want to spend your Saturday evening.
The thought excites you. Everything that happened last night just intensified your desire for him. For months, the affection you felt towards him slowly developed. And for months after, you tried to downplay it and hold yourself back from all you could feel. Now, you get to have him in all the ways you want, and itâs overwhelming. What once was a battle of conflicting emotions in your head and heart has been replaced with an overflow of them - all good ones, and itâs a new experience.Â
Itâs a new experience being able to talk about the things that hurt you, that scared you, that you dream about, just like you did last night while you sat on the couch. Itâs new being entangled with someone under soft sheets and actually wanting to stay. Itâs new sharing a meal with someone while you talk about your plans for the day, and then holding their hand while they drive later on. Itâs a new experience welcoming someone into your home and imagining spending days with them here.Â
Itâs also a new experience being able to openly ogle them, like what youâre doing now as you gaze at Jungkook sitting on your couch, phone still in hand as he now talks to Seokjin on the phone.Â
Heâs donned in a pair of jeans and plain white shirt with a baseball cap on, a casual ensemble that still has you melting because of how comfortable he looks. The thin, silver chain is an unexpected accessory, and he said itâs something heâs always had but rarely wore. But upon seeing your satisfied look, he said heâll wear it from now on. The way he smirked at you plays in your head, and with how heâs got his legs splayed out and his hand behind his head, you start to feel that familiar knot in your belly. You turn around before you get tempted to do anything. And while youâre free to do so, some self-discipline wouldnât hurt.Â
Youâre not pressed for time so you let him continue with his call. Based on what you hear, heâs updating his best friends about what happened last night, and his groans tell you that theyâre probably teasing him about it. Affectionately, you assume.Â
You decide to water your plants while waiting. It's been days. Some leaves have started to dry up so you remove those, too. Youâre focused on what youâre doing and jerk in surprise when you feel Jungkookâs arms wrap around your waist. But you settle in his hold immediately, leaning on his chest and humming in contentment now that your plants look better and more alive.Â
âSorry I kept you waiting,â he says, his chin resting on your shoulder now.Â
âItâs alright,â you reply. âHow did the talk with your parents go? And your friends?â
âAll fine. My parents want to have dinner and the guys want to go to a club,â he sighs. âBut I said youâre my priority right now and not them, so they just have to wait until Iâm free, which probably wonât be for a while since we have plans and all.â
âAnd what are those plans?â You turn around and ask.Â
âI donât know, weâll just have to make them.â
You playfully shake your head and lay your hands on his chest, a habit you think youâre going to develop with the way he constantly pulls you close.Â
âWe could make plans with them,â you say softly. âNot unless you, uh, donât want to.â
âDonât be silly,â he frowns. âOf course I do. I just donât want to impose and have you spend time with my family and friends if you donât want to.â
âWhy wonât I want to?â You frown back. âPlus, thatâs part of being with you, isnât it? Spending time with the people you care about?â
âIt is,â he smiles. âSo, uh, what do you think about next Saturday? We can have dinner with my parents then go out with the guys and then say weâre tired so we can leave early?â
âThatâs⌠thatâs quite the plan,â you laugh.Â
âOr we could just reschedule time with Seokjin and Taehyung. Theyâll understand.â
âIâm fine with that, too,â you nod. âAnd then maybe we could also, uh, make the trip to Daegu and I can properly introduce you to my family?âÂ
âThat sounds good,â he nods. âAnd what about your friends? That is, if they want to spend time with me. And by they, I mean Jimin.â
You snort in response to Jungkook's statement, which heâs not wrong for making. The last time they were in the same room together, you felt the tension through the roof.Â
âHeâs just being protective, as he should,â you explain. âHeâs seen me date men who turned out to be shitty and he just wants to make sure Iâm treated well. And that Iâm happy. And I am, so heâll be fine.â
âAre you sure thatâs all?â Jungkook questions.
âYes,â you assure him. âWeâve been best friends for 20 years. Itâs natural to be cautious about people. At least he is because Iâm clearly not.â
âOkay,â he hums. âWeâll make plans, then. And then we can go to one of our properties in Gwangju. And Jeju. And anywhere you want to go to. We could fly to Japan or Europe or wherever, really.â
âAlright, one at a time,â you chuckle, the mix of excitement and nervousness filling you up. âLetâs not forget that I have a budget and limited leaves.â
âWhich weâll work out,â he says, adding that heâs definitely not going to make you spend a single cent. âBut we could also just stay in or go to a park or watch movies. Anything, really.â
Thereâs a sadness in his eyes that you recognize, like this admission of longing that he doesnât want to acknowledge. You soften as you caress his face, wanting him to know that whatever it is he wants to do, you want to do all of those with him, too.
âI⌠I donât know when the last time was that I actually looked forward to the weekend,â he admits. âI didnât actually like it, only because I was forced to not work. And I always wanted to work. It⌠it made me forget how lonely I really was.â
He looks away, as he reveals a part of him that heâs never shared to anyone.Â
It wasnât always like this. His teenage years were filled with holidays with his parents and weekends in their scenic properties despite the distance he felt from them. But he couldnât wait to grow up, to be independent and live life his way. He studied hard and by the time he was in university, he was working at the company already, eager to learn and earn money, something he continued to do when he did his postgraduate studies in Singapore.Â
But he had Chaerin then, and his life was filled with excitement and happiness. There was always something to do, something to look forward to, until he lost it all and became a shell of who he was. There was so much void within that continued to get larger the more he spent time on his own after the breakup.Â
He worked even harder because he didnât know what to do with his time. He bought useless things because he didnât know what to do with his money. He went to clubs and slept around because he didnât want to be alone with his thoughts, only so he wouldnât be faced with the reality that he wasnât happy, that all the things he wanted - a sense of purpose, a hand to hold - were out of his reach.
The Arts Center was his saving grace. It gave his life meaning, as he sought meaning through it. And thatâs what allowed him to be here with you. In building something for others, he realized how strong his desire for intimacy was, and how much he wanted to experience the world with someone, to share in its joys and difficulties, to learn what more he could give and get from it. And youâre everything tangible that used to just be a blur to him.
In building something for you, he realized how much he wants you to be happy, how much he wants you to always be safe. And he gets to be that person who makes it happen.Â
Itâs barely been a day but he supposes itâs why he canât get enough of you, why he constantly reaches out, needing to know youâre next to him and not some image he conjured in his mind. Itâs why he wants to make all these plans, so he could experience all the things heâs wanted but was always afraid to feel because of the fear of losing it one day.Â
âThere are so many places I want to explore and I want us to do them together,â you whisper, tilting his chin so he faces you again. âThere are all these things I want to try and experience, even some things I usually do on my own that I want to share with you. I get you, Jungkook. I let days pass me by. All I did was look forward to something I didnât even know. Now I know what I want, and that includes having them with you.â
His eyes soften as you utter the words, with your fingers tracing his face as if to see if heâs real, too, and if happiness is something that you can finally touch.Â
âYou donât have to feel alone anymore,â you continue. âAnd I donât have to feel that way, either, because youâre there. I want you to always be there.â
âI will,â he smiles, gently pressing his lips onto yours. âAnd we can do whatever you want.â
âOkay. A ghost tour is on my list,â you say, thinking to lighten the mood.
âIt is, huh?â He laughs. âI mean, sure. I can definitely protect you.â
âYou mean, I can protect you,â you counter.Â
â___, Iâm scared of thunder, not ghosts. I think Iâll be fine,â he chuckles.Â
âAnd Iâm scared of the living, not the dead, so Iâll be fine, too,â you point out. âIâve always wanted to try it but I didnât want a spirit to latch onto me because I was alone.â
âI donât think thatâs how it goes,â he playfully shakes his head. âBut sure, we can do that. Anything else?â
âHmm. Something outdoors? I⌠I really liked it when we were at your lake house and we sat on the rocks by the stream,â you reminisce. âIt was very peaceful and it was just nice being out there.â
âDid you like it when you had your arms around me during the ATV ride, too?â He smirks. âBecause I did.â
âIt was bumpy,â you pout. âI should drive it next time and you can be my passenger.â
âGotta learn how to drive first,â he teases. âHow come you never learned?â
âBecause it didnât seem practical to learn and not have a car to drive,â you reason. âIâll just forget it so I never bothered. Probably when Iâm in my forties and I can afford to buy one.â
âOr I can get you one.â
He looks at you like heâs serious, and he probably is. So you draw the line before he thinks itâs okay for him to do that.
âYou wonât. I will not accept it,â you say sternly. âAnd you will not buy me anything of that kind.â
âFine. But I can buy you other things like jewelry and clothes andââ
âJungkook, you know I donât like you for your money, right?â You frown. âI know weâre leagues apart in terms of wealth and Iââ
âI know,â he says, pulling open your crossed arms and wrapping them around him again. âIâm just saying that I want to buy you things because I like you. Itâs⌠just a way for me to show you how I feel. No cars, I promise.â
âGood. Iâm not gonna be able to drive it anyway,â you laugh.
âI can always teach you,â he says. âItâs still a good skill to have, you know?â
âHmm, maybe one of these days,â you smile.Â
âSo in the meantime, I can get you something else. Maybe something for work? Please?â
He uses his doe-eyes to convince you, and it doesnât take much. You suppose that for someone whoâs not always good with words, buying you things is a way for him to make up for it. He built you a library, after all. Youâre not always good with words, either, but perhaps accepting what he gives is a way for you to show him how you feel, too, among other things.Â
âFine,â you give in. âJust one thing.â
You find yourself hours later in a boutique shop on a quiet street in Incheon.Â
You and Jungkook agreed that doing your shopping in the neighboring city will keep you from running into people that you donât want knowing about your relationship at this point, such as the management support team or anyone else, really.Â
You went to a shopping center after the hour-long drive. You opted for mid-range brands that offered comfortable basics, stocking up on slacks and tops to match the blazers and coats that you already have. You picked some flowy skirts and dresses, too, while Jungkook convinced you to get some of the statement pieces that caught your eye.Â
He was an engaged companion, carrying your basket as you walked around and then finding you when you wandered too far. He gave approving nods whenever you showed something to him, surprising you when heâd comment that you already have a similar colored top. He looked embarrassed then, when he explained that you had outfits that stuck with him. You admitted that so did you, with his charcoal and navy suits as your favorites.Â
He sported that shy smile again, a sight you never thought youâd one day be spoiled with. It always gave you a kind of comfort that youâve never felt before, and you suppose itâs why you wanted to keep seeing it. Doing this with him today has given you that same feeling, especially when heâd look at you satisfied and say that he really likes how the outfit looks on you.Â
You passed on the premium outlet shopping center, stating your case to Jungkook that youâre not one to wear luxury brands to a place as constant as your workplace. And while you agreed to him buying you something, you said you preferred it to be one of quality, and not just because it was expensive. Which is why youâre currently in this local boutique store selling the prettiest shoes youâve ever seen. Â
The name sounds familiar, and you remember going through some fashion magazines at Taehyungâs shop and seeing this listed on a best new brands list. Deservingly so, it seems, as the collection before you boasts of a variety of simple and statement designs that look soft and comfortable, too. Youâre particularly drawn to the colored ones, since you could never wear those styles before. Your recommended outfits only allowed basic and muted colors, so your black and nude pumps were your go-to. And while youâll still be wearing those, you definitely want a pair that would stand out. Or two.Â
âSee anything you like?â Jungkook breaks through your thoughts.Â
You turn to him with a sparkle in your eyes as you nod shyly.Â
âSee anything you really like?â He chuckles as he walks towards you and you nod again.Â
âTell me,â he urges.
You get the ones that caught your eye - a pair of orange satin pumps and these olive green suede heels with ankle straps. You love the hues and how theyâll contrast some of your neutral-colored outfits, but right now, you donât know which one you want more.
âI canât choose between these two,â you say, scrunching your eyebrows.Â
âEasy. We get both of them,â Jungkook replies as he asks the staff to get your size.Â
He stands in front of you as you try each pair, his eyes following you as you walk around the store and check yourself in the mirror. He softens at your smile as you look at your reflection. Thereâs wonder in it, and heâs glad that heâs able to give this to you, of all things. Itâs cliche but those shoes will take you to places; he looks forward to being next to you when they do.Â
He giggles when you wear one of each pair and keep turning positions to see how you look in them.Â
âHey, Iâm serious,â he says. âWe can get both of them. You can even get more.â
âBut I donât want you to spoil me,â you pout.Â
âBut I will,â he insists, standing in front of you now. âI liked the smile you had earlier. I want to keep making you smile like that. And no, I donât think youâre being materialistic or anything,â he adds before you unnecessarily defend yourself. âTheyâre pretty things and I want to give them to you.â
âFine,â you pout again. âDo you like them, at least?â
âTheyâre nice,â he compliments.
âJust nice?â You frown. âThatâs what you said the first time you saw me in a dress.âÂ
Your teasing smile makes him laugh, but it somehow comforts him. He remembers that day clearly, when you accompanied him to Taehyungâs shop to fit the suits made for him, and you tried on the gowns that his best friend made for you, too. Seeing you in that burgundy attire made his heart drop, and thatâs whatâs been happening every single time that he sees you all dressed up. He didnât think youâd remember but apparently, it stuck with you.Â
âItâs not like I could say that you looked stunning then, now could I?â He cocks an eyebrow.Â
âSo thatâs what you thought, huh?â You nibble your lower lip.
âAlways,â he responds. âItâs been hard keeping myself together ever since.â
The heat rushes to your cheeks at his confession, and for all the times you cursed yourself for being unprofessional for finding him attractive, you at least donât feel too bad now that he thought the same.Â
âThat makes both of us,â you smirk, liking how he playfully shakes his head and turns away.
He wants to kiss you right now but he knows itâs not the time nor place.Â
âSo, both of these shoes, then?â He confirms. âAre you sure you only want two?â
âYes. Youâve spoiled me enough already,â you state.Â
He concedes, even if he really wants to buy you more. He wants to shower you with so many things but he doesnât want to overwhelm you with that side of him just yet, so heâll take things slow for now.Â
He walks with you to the counter where he pays for the shoes. He sees the sparkle in your eyes when he takes the shopping bags from the staff and thereâs something so wholesome about how you look that has his insides warming up.Â
âYou like them, too, right?â You ask as you both walk out the store to head back to the car.Â
âOf course,â he hums. âTheyâre pretty and you like them. Plus, I saw the reviews that said the shoes are comfortable and sturdy. And you need that. I canât have you tripping yourself because of unstable heels and then falling into the arms of some man again. I wonât be there to catch you anymore.â
âHey,â you pull his arm to get his attention, frowning at him when he turns to you at the reminder of that Arts Center incident. âThat was one time.â
âYou trip on yourself when youâre on the ladder, too,â he points out. âAnd Iâm always there breaking your fall.â
âAnd why are you?â You cock an eyebrow. âYou always had your eyes on me, didnât you, Mr. Jeon?â
âCouldnât help it, even if I wasnât supposed to,â he says. âI just found myself always looking out for you. And you just happened to be tripping a few of those times.â
You laugh in response because heâs not wrong, but itâs also a way for you to tell him itâs okay. You suppose you werenât the only one paying attention because he seemed to do that a lot with you. And the more you think about it, the more you realize that the feelings you once doubted were sincere have been present all this time. But he held himself back, just like you did. He tried not to cross the line because he knew it wouldnât be right until you did, and all he wanted was to keep you close so he could be there for you. Because the moment he knew what was keeping you there, he made the difficult decision of letting you go.Â
You smile at the thought, learning now that when it comes to you, Jungkook is attentive. Heâs protective and he wants to make you happy, to shower you with gifts, to make you experience good things in life because itâs his way of expressing his feelings. You may be starting a new job that requires you to be apart from him, but in his own ways, heâs still looking out for you.Â
You want to carry him with you as you take on a new challenge, too. And youâll look back on today as a way for you to do that. Itâs in the shoes that he bought for you; itâs in his company and patience as you went around looking for clothes earlier; itâs in the experience of doing something together.Â
A sigh of relief escapes you as you settle in the passenger seat. Itâs been tiring but also really fun, and you smile again at the thought of being able to do this for yourself.Â
Since your first visit at Rkive Publishing, youâve been envisioning how youâd look and how your days were going to be. It filled you with excitement seeing that image of you in your mind - dressed in clothes that made you feel comfortable but powerful, in an environment that was challenging but exhilarating, in a place that didnât make you feel stuck or constrained. It truly feels like a new beginning, and you didnât realize that the simple act of shopping could make you see yourself differently, that it could make your approach to work feel more relaxed.
âI didnât know you enjoyed shopping that much,â Jungkook says. âGuess weâll have to do that again.â
âI didnât know, too,â you chuckle. âBut I think itâs more than that,â you turn to him with a soft smile. âI donât think Iâve ever really shopped for a full wardrobe before. All my office clothes were hand-me-downs from my mom when I started working and I just gradually bought my own over the years. But now I get to buy all these new things for what I feel like is a new chapter in my life, you know? It sounds silly but Iâm pretty sentimental about it.â
âItâs not silly,â he replies. âYouâre doing something that you chose, that youâre happy with. That means everything.â
His eyes soften and you realize that you havenât really talked about your resignation. And with all your excitement for your new job, the last thing you want is for you to think that you felt burdened by working for him.
âJungkook, I⌠Iâm sorry for resigning when I did,â you start, earning you a shake of his head. âI donât want you to think that I wasnât happy working for the company. Because I had great moments, and you were one of them,â you explain.Â
He nods as he takes in your words, and you take his hand to tell him you mean them.Â
âIt was hard at first but I stuck it out because it felt ungrateful of me to leave,â you continue. âThings got better when I was under Hoseok but there was always that feeling that I didnât deserve everything, even if I was giving all of myself to the job. And that was all on me. I realized that I was the one who couldnât move on from my past. And I just constantly felt stuck. Working hard was all I knew how to do until I didnât know myself anymore but you⌠You helped me realize what I was missing. You helped me realize what I could be.â
âHow?â He asks.
âThe Arts Center,â you say. âLearning about why you wanted to build it showed me that itâs what I wanted, too - to create meaning, to connect people to something, to experience something tangible that could stay with us. You were so passionate about it and I wanted to be passionate about something just like you. And Iâm sorry I had to leave because of that. And well, I also really like you and it didnât feel right to stay any longer after what happened.â
âI didnât realize that it meant that much to you,â he responds, caressing your hand now.Â
âIt did. It still does. Being there last night made me feel so many things, especially the library,â you say. âI think Iâll need time to really soak everything in.â
âWe can do that tomorrow,â he suggests. âItâll be open until late all weekend and we can go around if you want.â
âIâd really like that,â you smile at him.Â
He smiles back but thereâs still that tinge of sadness in his eyes, and you continue looking at him to urge him to say what he wants to say.Â
âI shouldâve asked you why you wanted to leave instead of asking you to stay,â he sighs. âI probably wouldâve understood. I mean I⌠Iâm working for my family and itâs all Iâll ever do. Iâve lost myself in it, too. I know itâs not the same but I guess thatâs why constructing the Arts Center mattered that much to me. It was different. I felt like it was the only way I could find meaning in what I was doing, something that went beyond my duties to my family. I⌠I learned what I wanted to be for someone, too, because of you. So I understand why you have to do this for yourself, ___,â he turns to you with an assuring look. âAfter everything settled, I knew that leaving would be the only way for you to be truly happy because then, you get to do something for yourself. And I just want you to know that I really want this for you, too. Iâm just glad I get to be next to you like this.â
You feel your eyes turn glassy. You hadnât realized just how much you needed to hear that from him. And given all the new experiences and challenges youâll be facing, having someone to hold your hand and tell you that things will be okay makes it more meaningful. You wonât be going through things on your own anymore. And you get to tell him that he wonât, either.Â
His smile tells you that he understands, and itâs one that you mirror.
âYour new boss seems nice,â Jungkook says as he looks back on the road. âHe called me one day and asked about you.â
âNamjoon did say he spoke with you,â you respond. âAnd yes, heâs very kind. He rambles a lot but heâs just very passionate about books and literature. Iâm sure Iâll learn so much from him.â
âThatâs good. Itâs a new industry so itâs important to have a mentor like him,â Jungkook hums. âJust, you know, donât trip and fall into his arms or something.â
âThat is not going to happen,â you laugh. âAre you jealous?â You nudge him. âAre you the jealous type?â
âNo,â he frowns.Â
âGood. You have nothing to be worried about, okay? He has nice dimples but I like yours better,â you tease.Â
He pouts at you but you just kiss his cheek to appease him, your own affection surprising you. You find yourself constantly showing it to him, wanting him to know how you feel instead of words you donât think youâll be able to say.Â
âAre you the jealous type?â He asks now.
âI actually donât know,â you wonder.Â
Your past relationships werenât really exclusive so you didnât have a reason to be jealous.Â
âWe should go to a club and see,â he says.Â
âHey,â you whine. âAll the women will flock to you.â
âAnd who says the men wonât flock to you?â He arches an eyebrow. âYouâre the one that people fall for.â
âAnd youâre not?â
â___, Iâve slept with women but letâs not pretend they wanted to be with me,â he chuckles.Â
âMaybe they did, and you just never gave them a chance,â you reason.
âWell, I never let them stay long enough to know,â he shrugs. âItâs not something I do, and itâs not something I ask of them.â
But you asked me to, you donât say. You remember the look of rejection in his eyes that night at his office and how you turned him away. Perhaps to him, youâre also someone he was willing to crawl out of his walls for, and for a time, he thought you didnât want him enough.Â
You promise yourself that youâll make it a point to show him that you always do, whether itâs through words or actions but especially through your way of opening up yourself to him completely.Â
You nudge his hand thatâs still in yours, prompting him to look at you.Â
âIâm here to stay,â you tell him, wanting him to feel the weight of your words because you donât do that for anyone, either. âIâm not going anywhere.â
You say it almost in a whisper, like itâs a promise you want him to know youâll always keep. He lifts your hand to his lips and he kisses it, a way to let you know that heâs not going anywhere, too. Heâll keep holding your hand wherever you or he goes because he knows that right next to you is where he wants to be.
Itâs a very intimate act, and itâs barely been a day but heâs done so many of those already with you, including expressing his honest and sentimental feelings. He supposes itâs all the time heâs held back. Or maybe all the years that he kept himself from feeling and showing any of that.Â
But you have each other to share those with now and he hopes that however he chooses to show them to you, youâll understand and accept them and like you said, youâll stay and not go anywhere.Â
You spend the rest of the car ride back to Seoul talking about the posts and articles being written about the Arts Center. You go on social media and read them out to Jungkook, warming at how softly he smiles with every compliment from the visitors and artists. Even if you werenât there during the ceremony last night, youâre glad that youâre at least able to celebrate with him from this day forward.Â
You arrive at a supermarket and let Jungkook take the lead. But while heâs buying to fill up his fridge and pantry, heâs taken it upon himself to make sure you have everything you need and want, too.Â
He picks up the coffee pods and grounds that you mentioned you like. He asks you for your preferred snacks and desserts on top of the chocopie that he gets boxes of. He lets you choose your skincare and bath products. He grabs containers of side dishes and an array of meat and vegetables, as well as a sack of rice. There are other ingredients he gets and before you know it, youâve got a cart filled to the brim and a satisfied man pushing it to the counter.Â
He pays for his purchases and you realize just how much heâs actually bought.
âAre you throwing a party that I donât know of?â You tease, as he hauls all the groceries in his trunk. âThatâs a lot of shopping for one person.â
âI, uh, I was hoping to have you stay over during the weekends,â he says shyly. âI mean, we can also stay at your place if youâre okay with us being there. But I just thought about buying a lot of what we want when we stay in and stuff.â
âAre you bribing me with food so that Iâll spend more nights with you?â You cock an eyebrow.
âYes? Well, Iâd like to think Iâm good company, too,â he chuckles. âAnd that youâd, uh, want to spend time with me. Is it too much?â
âOf course not,â you say. âItâs sweet actually, how youâre making a space for me in your home. And you donât have to bribe me, you know? The place is good, the companyâs good,â and whispering in his ear, you add, âthe sex is good. I⌠Iâd like to spend time with you, too.â
âThatâs comforting,â he laughs as you both head inside the car. âAlthough Iâd prefer for that last one to be more than good.â
âHmm. Good thing you have tonight to show me, then,â you teasingly smile.Â
He groans as he playfully shakes his head, this bold version of you still flustering him. But he wants to tease back, so he turns to you and pulls your face close to him. He gives you a deep kiss before booping your nose with his.
âJust make sure to keep up, yeah?â He answers.Â
âRude,â you gasp, earning you a laugh. âItâs not my fault you donât get tired.â
âItâs not my fault that you do.â
Your pout makes him want to erase it with a kiss so thatâs what he does again, and he likes that he can do this over and over, as many times as he wants.Â
âIâm kidding. Iâll do whatever you want,â he smiles. âJust as long as it makes you feel good.â
Youâre only able to nod now, not wanting to provoke him any further because another word of him telling you what he can do is gonna cause you to spiral.Â
The sun is still out by the time you arrive at his penthouse with everything you bought for the day. He insists on having your clothes washed - a perk he has as owner of the building, and you give in. He says itâs so theyâre all ready for you next week, and youâre once again reminded of this thoughtful side of him. Sure, money helps, but you suppose itâs easy for a rich man to just think of what conveniences him but not others. In many ways, heâs shown you that heâs more than that. Youâre able to see it all up close now, and you canât help but like him even more.Â
After he hands your bag of clothes to the butler, he heads to the kitchen where he says heâs going to prepare dinner. You follow him and look on curiously as he brings out a few of the ingredients you bought earlier.
âWhatâs on the menu?â You ask, sitting on the counter right next to where heâs got his work space laid out.
âBuckwheat noodles with my special sauce,â he answers. âAnd some boiled pork.â
âThat sounds delicious,â you hum. âAnd here I thought you hire people to cook for you.â
âCanât really call someone over at 2AM to make me dinner, can I?â He laughs.Â
âWhy would you have dinner at 2AM?!â
âBecause itâs how I am,â he shrugs. âI mean, sometimes I have dinner out. Some nights Iâm so tired from work so I take a nap and wake up at odd hours, or Iâd just work all night and realize I havenât eaten so I make something then. Meat is easy to grill, noodles are quick to make, but for you, Iâm making special versions.â
âI feel special already,â you giggle. âBut thatâs not healthy, Jungkook,â you turn serious. âMeal time is meal time and rest time is rest time. You always work so hard, you need to take a break and not overdo yourself.â
âI know. You used to tell me that all the time,â he smiles softly. âIt was nice to hear, and I listened to you. I guess those were the only times when I let myself take a breath. You were pretty stubborn about it.â
âBecause you were a hard-head about it,â you frown. âSo much for being protective of me when you couldnât even look out for yourself.â
âI know, thatâs why you were there,â he points out. âAnd you were the same, so thatâs why I was there for you, too. We, uh, I guess we complemented each other that way.âÂ
âI guess,â you smile now.Â
Thereâs some sadness in that thought, though, at how you both went on years just focusing on your respective jobs individually and not having much you share with others. Sure, you had your friends and so did he, but in the silence of your own homes, you lived through every day just waiting for the next, not knowing what to look forward to about it.Â
You suppose thatâs what happens when you share only the most shallow parts of yourself to someone - your body, your time, your energy - but even those were limited. Now, you get to feel what itâs like to share more of them, in ways that require more. But youâre willing to do all that, and you can see that so is he.  Â
Jungkook boils the pork in some spices and says that itâll take some time. He gestures towards the balcony where you see the sun about to set. Youâve never seen it from this high, and he says that he hasnât watched it from here in months because heâs been getting home late. His office doesnât offer this same view.Â
You head out and take a seat on the couch where he follows. He positions himself next to you, wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you closer until youâve got your legs on his lap and your head on his chest. Being with him like this, you feel comfortable again; you feel safe.Â
The sky is beautiful and itâs another version of it that you get to share with him. You know thereâll be more of this that youâll have, and youâll keep this in your memory just like all the other times that you did.Â
His free hand draws patterns on your knee and you try to decipher what they are, recalling those days of watching him doodle on his leather notebook and wondering whatâs on his mind.Â
Itâs something you ask him and there's a beat of silence before he answers.
âThereâs a lot of things I think about,â he says. âMost times I donât know how to make sense of them or express them so I just draw whatever I feel like. Theyâre mostly figures and structures because they at least make sense to me even if my feelings donât.â
âWhat about now? Do your feelings make sense?â
âA little bit,â he hums, but he assures you itâs not a bad thing. âYou always felt familiar. I think thatâs why I was so hesitant to get to know you and why I felt like I had to keep my distance. It wasnât right to feel that way for my assistant. I know now why that was. We crossed paths a long time ago and I guess we made each other feel something that we couldnât find in others or that we couldnât find ourselves. Itâs familiar but itâs all new. Isnât it contradictory?â
âMaybe. But it also could be that we felt something like that before and we lost it along the way. And we met again and so weâre feeling it again, but in a different way,â you try to explain. âFamiliar but new. Do you doubt it?â
âNot at all,â he shakes his head. âI just couldnât help but think about it because this version of myself feels different but itâs still me.âÂ
âI get you. Iâm not really like this, either. Iâm not fond of affection. Iâm not this giggly or this⌠honest or this bold. Iâm terrified of many things so Iâm also not this brave but you⌠you bring all that out of me, Jungkook. And it feels really good.â
âIâm not this honest, too. I donât know where my words come from,â he chuckles.Â
âI was about to say that youâre able to express your feelings just fine,â you smile.Â
âThatâs barely scratching the surface,â he says. âThereâs still a lot I donât know how to say.â
Regret is one of them, Jungkook thinks. And guilt and fear and an overwhelming joy and clarity that he canât fully express. Thereâs still hesitation somehow but vulnerability, too. Thereâs a feeling of inadequacy and a desire to give you everything he can.
âMe, too,â you sigh. âWe can always just keep showing it to each other in different ways. I know thatâs not always easy, but we can⌠we can keep trying. I held so much of what I felt for months and Iâm just glad I donât have to do that anymore.â
âI held back for a year,â he blurts, surprising you. Your questioning eyes urge him to continue. âI⌠I thought you were pretty. And you put me in my place, youâre honest and caring, youâre so good at what you do, youâre⌠someone I wanted to be around, even if it didnât seem like it. And Iâll always be sorry for how I treated you.â
âI have a lot of shortcomings, too, Jungkook,â you admit. âI judged you before I met you because you never smiled during the times I saw you. And then I constantly compared you to Hoseok and I shouldnât have.â
âWell, look at me now. I donât think Iâve ever smiled this much,â he chuckles. âBut itâs okay. We⌠we were getting used to each other.â
âWe were. And I⌠I like seeing you smile. There would be nights when Iâd fall asleep thinking about it,â you confess.Â
âHere I thought I was the only one doing that,â he laughs.Â
âWeâre so ridiculous,â you laugh back. âWeâve said too much. Now we can kiss.â
âYou like doing that, huh?â He smirks, pulling you to sit on top of him now.Â
You shift on his lap and find a position that has your heart racing. You moan when his hands guide you in grinding against his slowly hardening length. And he watches you move before his eyes flit to meet yours, the desire heightening and the tension building.
âI do, very much,â you whisper, bending down to graze your nose against his before you kiss him.Â
It starts off tender but with the feel of him underneath you and his tongue amorously entangling with yours, it gets rough soon enough. Youâre thankful that youâre seated closer to the door, leaving you less exposed than if you were near the railings. Itâs enough privacy that heâs able to sneak his hand under your scrunched up dress without you minding, and you moan louder when he pulls your bra so he could flick your nipple thatâs clearly screaming to be touched.Â
You return the favor, untucking his shirt so you could touch his chest, too. It reminds you of how youâd mapped this out last night, the tautness of it making you imagine all the ways you could pleasure him there. But you settle with your nails grazing against his smooth torso this time, knowing you have all of tonight and perhaps tomorrow to do it.Â
âFuck,â he mumbles against your lips. âBaby, weâre gonna have to take this inside,â he says, although he doesnât stop nor let you go. He continues to kiss you and drag his hands all over your back.
âWe should,â you say, not stopping either.Â
It takes a few more nibbles on each otherâs lips before you finally pull away, heaving in pleasure and wanting more. But you remove yourself from him before you get into it again. Walking back inside, he surprises you with another squeeze of your ass, prompting you to turn to him.Â
âYou like doing that, huh?â You repeat his words.Â
âI do, very much,â he hums. He hugs you from behind and says, âthis, too,â as he nuzzles your neck.
You only laugh in response but deep down, thereâs this warmth you feel at how much affection heâs giving you and how much youâre accepting and returning it. You werenât big on intimacy with your exes. You werenât the type to hold their hand or cling to them or caress them outside of sex. They werenât natural for you, and you suppose those kinds of acts required more openness and emotional closeness that you didnât feel for them.
But with Jungkook, itâs as if itâs all you want to do, and it seems to be the same for him. You didnât realize how holding his hand could be so assuring, or how feeling him wrap around you could relieve you of your tiredness, or how kissing him could make time stop yet you still feel thereâs not enough of it when youâre with him.Â
And as he stands by the stove, pan frying dumplings for your appetizer while the pork continues to boil, all you want to do is watch him be.Â
Youâve always admired him for his dedication to his craft. Youâve sat through countless meetings, watched him draft blueprints and plans and present them, and listened to him put together ideas and designs. Heâs creative, rational, and very smart, and it always impressed you how much technical knowledge he has. He always had such confidence in his abilities and that also made him very attractive to you.Â
But seeing him in a domestic setting in his casual clothes while cooking your dinner ignites something else within you. Itâs this desire to see and experience all sides of him, and to be welcomed in every nook of his big heart.Â
He arranges the dumplings on a plate and mixes the dipping sauce, then places the dish on the counter for both of you to enjoy. He takes a piece, blows on it, then feeds it to you, and you laugh to yourself because this is something that you used to tell Hajoon that you could do on your own so he doesnât have to. But with Jungkook doing it now, he triggers a swarm of butterflies in your belly that has you giggling.Â
He just smiles, the warmth in his eyes telling you that this is something he wants to do for you and you let him. Heâs told you he wants to take care of you and you want that, too. You want to show him that you can do it as well.
Jungkook gets a bowl and starts making the sauce while he boils the buckwheat noodles. Itâs something he came up with one late evening, adding perilla oil and egg yolk to the different condiments he had on stock. You feed him dumplings while he mixes the ingredients, which he eventually pours over the noodles then sprinkles seaweed on top of it. It looks creamy and delicious, and partnered with the boiled pork that he plates on a wooden board, your mouth starts to water.
Itâs all surprisingly delicious, as you tell him that you didnât think that just putting a bunch of sauces together would create something that good. You enjoy dinner over beer and then insist that youâll clean up while he takes a bath.Â
Itâs an hour later when you exit his bathroom, your heart skipping a beat at seeing him sitting on the bed, his back across the frame with the covers over his legs while he scrolls through his phone. He doesnât have a shirt on, leaving his toned upper body in full display for you to stare at. Youâve already seen this last night; ran your hands all over them, even, but somehow you know itâll always take your breath away.Â
He looks up when he senses youâre back, and he smiles seeing you donned in one of his oversized shirts. He likes you in his clothes. Thereâs something so domestic about it, even if heâll end up taking them off of you anyway.Â
And thatâs what he does, as he moves to sit on the edge of the bed while you remain standing in front of him. He caresses the sides of your thighs while he looks up at you, before pulling up your shirt that you help him remove.Â
You giggle when his lips immediately plant themselves on your torso, where he kisses and sucks the soft plane of flesh that has you moaning in pleasure. His hands travel around - kneading your ass, sliding up then fondling your breasts, before theyâre removing your underwear and then cupping your bare cunt.
âJungkook, baby,â you whine, feeling the sensation all over your body. âWant you, please.â
Itâs the words he loves hearing from you, knowing the desire comes from somewhere deep. Itâs because youâve allowed him to a place that no oneâs ever been to before, and itâs a place he wants to stay in for as long as youâll let him.Â
And he takes it to heart. He wants to feel you feel good; he wants to hear it, to breathe it, to let your pleasure course through his body and let it linger, and thatâs the only way heâll feel good. Itâs not just about chasing his own high like it used to be. With you, itâs always more.
He switches places with you, lays you on the edge of the bed while he kneels on the floor for that angle that lets him taste all of you. He laps you up and he feels your clit pulsate against his tongue, your breathy curses complementing the way your body screams for him. He increases the pressure to build you up then slows down to prolong it.Â
You seek him. Your hands pull him forward, your cunt thrusts against his face, you yell out his name, and when you come, his lips are what you want all over you, all over again.Â
Youâre eager. The short second it takes for him to stand up, youâre pulling his boxers down and stroking his length; youâre swallowing him whole before he could even catch a breath. But itâs everything he wants, as your warmth coats his aching cock and he pushes into you, hearing your obscene sounds as you take him in.Â
âYou feel so good,â he grunts, your tongue swirling around his slit. âFuck, baby, just like that.â
He manages to open his eyes, and the sight of you eager to please him sends shivers down his spine. You fondle his balls, you play with your breast, you thrust against nothing while you moan with your mouth full of him. He softens for a while, tucking the damp strands of hair behind your ear, before he pulls away then guides you to flip over with your hands and knees on the bed.
Youâre able to take a breath while he puts on his condom, but you're already dazed, your mind completely hazy from everything that Jungkook makes you feel.Â
The way he fills you up is heavenly. He hits your deepest spot, and the pace of his movement has him grazing every inch of your walls. He pushes your waist down with his every thrust, making both of you feel the sensation in a mind-numbing way.
Your knees are trembling but you donât mind. Your knuckles are probably turning white from how hard youâre gripping his sheets but itâs your only anchor for now. Your neck is straining and youâre breathless as he relentlessly bucks his hip against you but you donât want him to stop.Â
He switches it up, both his hands on your waist now to keep it steady while he drags himself in and out of you. You clench around him and push against his movements, and it has him moaning curses with your name. His pace becomes erratic, and thatâs how you know heâs close.
âTouch yourself, baby,â he instructs you. âCome with me. Fuck, fuck, I want you to come.â
You do as youâre told, reaching down to stroke your clit while he pounds you from behind. And when you hear his deep breaths and a prolonged moan, you quicken your pace until youâre coming once again.
He pants, all the energy being drained out of him, but you still feel him gently kiss your shoulders, then your spine, then your ass cheeks before he lays in bed next to you.Â
He breathes heavily but he manages a soft smile that mirrors yours, and all you want to do is wrap him in your arms until you both fall asleep.Â
âSex just good?â He teasingly asks.Â
âWere you trying to make a point?â You cock an eyebrow.
âMaybe,â he huffs.
You shift your position, your arm now supporting your body as you lay on your side. Your hand traces his bare torso, which still rises and falls from the ordeal, and he hums in satisfaction.Â
âDid you like that?â You whisper in his ear, biting your lip in anticipation of his answer.Â
âUh-huh,â he breathes out. âFuck, you feel so good. You take me so well, baby. That was justâŚâ
âI want to keep making you feel good, Jungkook,â you moan, liking how heâs at a loss for words. âAnd I want you to keep fucking me like that.â
Your vulgar words contrast the tender way you graze your nose against his neck, and it somehow makes his mind even more hazy. Youâre everything he wants, and heâll do everything to keep you next to him.Â
âI will,â he promises, turning to his side to face you. âIâll do that and more.â
And he does, as he cleans you up and tucks you under the covers with his arms around your body. Youâre cradled in his, and the clarity you feel after such a mind-numbing experience is so satisfying.Â
You suppose this is what intimacy is - feeling that high and then landing on a soft field of everything beautiful, and you decide that this is the only place youâll ever want to be in. Jungkook smiles at you and you just know he feels the same way you do.
You wake up with Jungkook next to you this time, your limbs entangled with his under the comforts of his soft blanket. Your eyes flutter open and you see him propped up on his tattooed arm, smiling at you.
âWere you just watching me sleep?â You mumble.
âMaybe,â he teasingly shrugs. âItâs nice to see you resting well.â
âItâs your sheets,â you say, earning you a laugh.
âGuess I know what to spoil you with next time,â he winks.Â
âWhat time is it? And why arenât you working out?â You ask, knowing itâs how he always starts his day.Â
â11,â he answers. âIâm surprised I didnât wake up earlier. But when I did I just thought to sleep in with you.â
âHmm, good decision,â you grunt, your mind still half asleep but awake enough to appreciate his half naked form next to you. You scoot closer and hug him, causing him to lay flat on his back while he wraps his arm around your bare body. âThis is better than a workout.â
âWell, I kinda had mine last night,â he giggles.
And heâs not wrong. After he tucked you in bed, you spent another hour or so just talking and cuddling and that led to another round of him pounding into you from the side, and then another one with him over you. He went so hard that he had to take another shower at 3 in the morning and heâs probably done his arm and core exercises for today.Â
You donât even know how you managed to withstand all that, but you did, and you loved every second of it. You loved how he bit his lip in pleasure and how his neck veins popped out as he pounded into you intensely. You basked in his whimpered sounds and the kisses he showered you with as he came down.Â
And now youâre in his embrace, curled against him. You'd do this all day if you could.
âBut this is nice,â he hums, as he strokes your back while also combing your hair with his fingers.Â
He kisses the top of your head while you moan in satisfaction, a kind of soft pleasure that relaxes you, that makes you feel like youâre floating but also enveloped in pure warmth. Thatâs what hugging Jungkook feels like, as his toned but smooth arms wrap around you. His rough fingers tenderly roam your body, and it eases your tired being; nuzzling his neck, you feel like you could fall asleep again.Â
But youâre quite hungry and you assume that so is he, so you slowly disentangle yourself from him and say that youâll be cooking lunch when he whines.Â
âI told you Iâll make something for you this time,â you say, appeasing him with a kiss on the cheek.Â
âFine,â he concedes, stating that heâll go over the interview questions that a few reporters have sent over for him to answer while youâre cooking.Â
He follows you to wash up in the bathroom - then gives you a deeper kiss right after - and then to the kitchen. He sits on the stool by the counter while you cook rice and seafood pajeon, something you boasted about last night.Â
âBabe, you think you could help me with the questions?â He asks, catching you off guard with the pet name that he uses in a different context for the first time.Â
âSure,â you hum. âRead them out loud.â
So he does, and you spend much of the hour going through them and sipping your coffee, with him pulling you for a hug when you wander to his side.Â
You eat lunch while watching sports highlights on TV, then you spend the afternoon laughing over the variety TV show episodes that youâve missed these past weeks.Â
Itâs 5PM when you both start dressing up for dinner that heâll treat you to for your first official date, heâd said, insisting that he likes eating at nice places. He has you to share the experience with this time, and he doesnât want you to worry about expenses of any kind. He wants to eat at your favorite noodle houses, too, and thatâs a plan for another day.Â
You have on a skirt and top outfit that thankfully matches your new pumps. Once you finish putting on your makeup, you head to Jungkookâs walk-in closet to check on him, your throat drying up at seeing him in an all-black denim ensemble. Heâs sexy enough as it is, with the skinny jeans accentuating his ass and his thick thighs. But when the sleeves of his shirt are rolled up to his elbows and when the buttons are undone just up to his chest to show the tank top heâs wearing underneath, sexy becomes too simplistic. Even more so when you spot the silver chain around his neck again, simple and classic but definitely dangerous.
He turns to you and takes in your look before he smirks. But just as you expect him to compliment you or even kiss you, he instead reaches out for your hand and interlocks his fingers with yours when you take it.Â
âLetâs go,â he says, leading you out.Â
He doesnât say much on the way to the car. He just gazes at you then smiles when you look at him. Itâs during the drive when he kisses your hand, surprising you, and thereâs that warmth that you feel again. You listen to the soft sounds of the radio this time, sharing in the silence the way that you used to, and itâs far from uncomfortable, especially with him thumbing your hand that heâs not letting go of.Â
You make it to the restaurant where youâre seated by the window, able to appreciate the setting of the sun. The food is delicious, with the variety of tender meats causing you to silently moan at how good it is. Thereâs an array of dishes that Jungkook orders, and you spend the rest of dinner talking about your favorite food and the other places you want to try.Â
Satisfied from the meal, you both head to the Arts Center. You know youâll have another time to fully explore. Youâll remember how the areas looked before renovation and youâll look on in pride at how different they are now. Thereâll be opportunities for you to check every exhibition and watch performances here. When the Center hosts some of the international film festival events in two months, youâll definitely attend and pay attention to the halls and other spaces. Youâll come during the day and appreciate the light coming through the windows, and youâll be able to gaze at the art installations outdoors.
But tonight, you want your focus to be on the childrenâs library, the one that Jungkook had built for you.Â
The Center closes late on weekends so you have time to savor it. You want to remember the feeling of being inside it with him, as if youâre making him part of the memory, as if youâre including him in the best moments of your childhood.Â
You finally enter the grand library, appreciating the details and the grandness of it. You ask Jungkook where the archive section is now, and what the process of moving it was like.Â
âI had to incorporate it in the main area instead of separating it,â he explains. âYoongi and I found a corner to establish its presence and then scattered the pieces beyond that, putting them in glass enclosures around the desks and on the walls. I think itâs better that way; visitors become intrigued and want to learn more, so they could go around and end up exploring more of the library.â
âThatâs strategic,â you say, appeased that there were gains in making the change. You stand at the entrance of the childrenâs space and then to him. âSo, what made you decide to do this?â
He talks about his late afternoon jog one weekend and discovering a park that reminded him of the playground that his father built for him. He tells you about all the apologies his old man couldnât make, and all the words left unsaid that Jungkook realized had held them together despite the distance and the detachment.Â
âI thought about all the times that you needed someone and I happened to be there,â he continues as he follows you around inside. âAnd then the times when I wasnât or no one was. I donât ever want you to feel alone. I thought that if Iâm not in your life anymore, I could at least build you something that would make you happy, that would protect you, the way you said your old neighborhood library made you feel.â
His words leave you speechless. You suppose that for someone not good with them, he finds the right ones when he needs to. You were overwhelmed with emotions the first time you saw this, and you couldnât fully grasp how he could make something like this for you.Â
That playground mattered to him, the way your old library did. Only he would understand how a space or a structure could comfort you, how it could take your fears away, and how that feeling could stay with you for a long time. He wanted you to continue feeling that whether you found your way back to each other or not, and now that you have, you feel that happiness and that safety even more.
You run your fingers across the murals then sit on the couch with the fluffy teddy bear next to you. The more you look around, the more you realize that this isnât just meant for children. The seating areas are big enough for adults, so is the activity space at the back. Itâs where those with child-like hearts and minds can stay - to reminisce perhaps, or to make new memories. You think youâll be doing both.
âIs it close to how your library looked?â He asks, as you both walk past the shelves and you scan the books they have.Â
âJungkook, that was a semi-rundown library that used to be someoneâs house. It had chipped wallpapers and creaking wooden floors,â you giggle. âThis is definitely much prettier but I see so much of the old one in here. The warm lights, all the colors, the different areas to read and draw and color. The paper dolls,â you squeal. âItâs⌠familiar but new, just like everything with you is. I⌠I donât know what else to say.â
âA thank you is fine,â he smiles, pulling you close to him. Youâre behind one of the shelves, and with no one else here this late Sunday evening, he wraps his arms around your waist. âI wouldnât mind a kiss, too.â
âYou deserve more than all that,â you whisper, kissing him softly. âThank you, Jungkook. Iâll be spending weekends here. Or when I have a tough day at work. Or when youâre away and Iâm missing you.â
âGood. That way I know that when youâre down, you have somewhere to go so you could feel better. And less alone.â
Thatâs all he hopes, after all - that on days when he canât be what you need, thereâs a place that he built that will make you feel better.Â
He treasures your smile and the way your eyes shine as you go through the picture books that have their own row of shelves. He beams at how beautiful you look being enamored with the space that reminds you of the best parts of your childhood. And he softens when you look at him with so much adoration, words seemingly not enough to express how you feel.Â
You donât say much as you walk back to the car though. When he drives to his penthouse, you hold his hand. But something inside you stirs so you guide his palm to your thigh, smiling when he caresses it. He sees you bite your bottom lip at the act, and though heâs tempted to do more, he decides that tracing your skin is what he wants to do for now.
The feel of Jungkook touching any part of your body is electrifying. He ignites a kind of desire in you that youâve never felt before, whether itâs simply holding your hand or stroking the inside of your thigh.
Being back in the library made you feel many things. It brought back memories and made you imagine all the new ones youâll make. It also filled you with an overwhelming need for him, as you think of all the ways you could show him your appreciation. Including one that you could do tonight.
So after making it past the door of his apartment, and after briefly watching his impeccable figure walk down his hallway, you donât hold back. He turns around and you donât even hear what he asks. You just head towards him and kiss him.
You kiss him hard and deep, your hands wrapping around his neck to pull him as close as you can get him, even as you guide him towards his living room, knowing where you want him. He moans when you bite his lower lip, your fingers desperately gripping his shirt now as you want more.Â
You pull away to catch your breath, your intense eyes saying everything you want to do to him. He caresses your cheek but only briefly, as his thumb traces your lips before pushing it past them. The sight of you sucking his finger - gentle at first before you do it desperately - has his cock throbbing, impatient to feel your mouth wrapped around it.
âFuck. Good girl,â he says under his breath, as you lick his thumb teasingly to tell him what you want to do.Â
You kiss him again, your fingers now eagerly undoing his buttons. He removes his shirt then you pull his tank top off him before you push him to sit on the couch. You stand before him and stare at him shamelessly, as he sits comfortably and stares back at you. His hands are behind his head now, with his taut arms in full display for you to salivate over.Â
But itâs his chest that you want to pay attention to rigjt now, all perfectly toned and every bit breathtaking.
âTake your clothes off,â he says before you can make your move.Â
âIs that an order, Mr. Jeon?â You breathe out, knowing how the name affects him.Â
âYes,â he huffs. âAn urgent one.â
You smirk as he plays along, and you take your time in undressing. You watch his eyes move with you, his breaths deepening now as you bare yourself in front of him.Â
âDon't touch yourself. Iâll do that,â you instruct. âAnd thatâs not a suggestion.â
He chuckles in response but he seems to enjoy it, relaxing in his position. You take that as your cue, settling on his lap and then mapping his torso with your hands as you lick and suck his neck. He angles it to give you more space, and he hisses when you take advantage.Â
Your mouth travels south, leaving kisses on his collarbone and sternum before twirling your tongue around his pert nipples that are aching for attention. He starts to pant and you decide to take your time, wanting his pleasure to build up so you could hear him beg for you this time. You moan as you nibble his buds, but your own pleasure builds, too, and with your hand feeling his thick length underneath those jeans, you suddenly canât wait any longer.
âYou like that, baby?â You whisper in his ears. âYou like it when I do that?â
âFuck, yes,â he wails. âFuck, baby. Thatâs so good.â
With a few more kisses towards his hips, you move as well, now finding yourself kneeling on the floor and quickly undoing his belt. He lets you do all the work, and you donât mind. You like how his chest rises and falls in anticipation, and when you finally free his cock, you let out an obscene sound that even youâve never heard before.
Youâve been graced with this scene these past days, but it still leaves a lump in your throat. Heâs thick and veiny and everything you want to taste and have inside you. You pull off his jeans until heâs bare as well. You stroke him once and the moan he makes is all you need.Â
With your thumb on his slit, you lick up his shaft until youâre swallowing him whole, his tip hitting your throat that it makes you groan. The vibration has him grunting and it pushes you, so you start moving your mouth and hand up and down his length, with your tongue swirling over his tip and all the other sensitive parts of him.Â
Your free hand explores. You stroke his leg and then brush your fingers over his inner thighs. You caress his torso when you go deep and bask in the way he breathlessly curses, over and over again.Â
Needing a quick breather, you let your hands do their work. But Jungkook takes this chance to bend over and capture your mouth in his. He kisses you fervently, sucking the air out of you and you donât really mind running out of it, not when he tastes as good as he does, when heâs as desperate for you as you are for him. He pulls on your hair gently, slowly tightening his grip when your kiss gets more intense.Â
He eventually pulls away, leaving you free to tease and suck his cock once again. He moans continuously, cursing under his breath once you let him guide your head to take all of him in. His obscene sounds make it all worth it, especially once you feel his body tighten.
âFuck, baby Iâm close,â he whimpers. âFuck, IâI need to come inside you, fuck.â
You slowly remove yourself from him, but your hand remains wrapped around his length. You look at him with your glassy eyes, desperate to feel every inch of him possible.
âCome inside me, please,â you whisper. âI want to feel you come inside me. I needâŚâ
You pant, your eyes telling him what you really mean. You donât want any more barriers. You want to feel him drag against your walls, to release his warmth and fill you up completely. Youâve mentioned being clean and so has he; you said in passing how youâre on implants, too. He looks at you and nods in understanding, just like all the times that youâve spoken to each other through your gazes. With the way he heaves, he seems to want it just as much as you.Â
He pulls you towards him and guides you to sit on his lap. He strokes his cock and drags his tip through your folds, teasing you before slowly pushing it inside you. He feels even more immaculate like this, and your walls embrace him immediately, as if heâs always meant to be there. You get on your knees as you position yourself to ride him, and your gentle movements follow a pace that has you keening, especially when he starts licking your pert nipples thatâs been needing his attention.Â
You grind against him with his hands kneading your ass to guide you. You feel him deep, and it has you breathless and wanting more.You sit up and wrap your arms around his neck for support as he pounds on you from below, and with his tight grip around your waist and his mouth sucking your breasts, you start to feel hazy.
âYou feel so good around me, shit,â he moans. âFuck, baby. Youâre so perfect for me, fuck.â
He continues his thrusts and youâre so lost in the overstimulation. Your body starts to shake as you chase the high, letting it all overwhelm you.Â
âBaby, Iâm gonna come,â you whimper. âIâmââ
Your orgasm is a loud crash, and you feel it linger. You feel your essence coat him; you feel the slick drip out of you and stick to your bodies, mixed with the sweat from all the work of building each other up.  Â
He curses again as he feels the wetness all over his cock, and itâs heavenly. Feeling you like this does something to him, and he wants you to do it again.Â
So he pounds even harder, not giving you much time to calm down. You moan in response, scratching his back as you hold onto him tightly while he releases all his energy onto pleasuring you and him. He slows his pace and moves in circular motions before he lays you on your back. Your eyes are glassy. Your mouth knows only his name. Your hair is damp and youâre panting. And you look absolutely beautiful as you beg for him to make you come again, and for him to finally come inside you.
Watching you feel all that he can give is what he needs. With his arms propped on your sides to support him, he goes hard and deep. Heâs been somewhat gentle these first few times, and he knows that that drives you wild. But he also knows that going a bit rough would make you lose your mind even more, so thatâs what he does.Â
He pins your arms down as he slowly pushes inside you.
âYou like it like this, yeah?â He pants. âYou like it when I reach this deep?â
âYes, baby. Yes, please. Please donât stop,â you whimper, this view of him with his damp hair and his silver chain hanging over you making you crazy.
Your eyes roll to the back of your head with how good he feels, especially when he hits you at an angle that makes your body come alive but also numb, and itâs a feeling you canât get enough of.Â
He hums in satisfaction, choosing now to suck on your neck while he continues his assault on your pussy. He licks the shell of your ear and whispers how good you make him feel.
âYou take me so well, baby. Such a good girl, yeah?â He grunts. âFuck, youâre so good.â
You can only moan in response, unable to form proper words now. And he senses it, with your mouth hanging open and your erratic breathing escaping it.Â
He straightens himself, knowing what he needs to do. So he plays with your clit while his other movements continue, and thatâs how you find your voice again. He quickens his pace, his thumb doing its work on your most sensitive spot while your walls pulsate around his throbbing cock. Your legs start to shake until youâre wailing in pleasure, screaming his name as you orgasm another time. He knows enough to focus on kissing you, swallowing your sounds as you come down.
But you want him to reach his peak this time, so you tell him to keep going, to find his spot so he could fill you up this time. He spreads your legs open in response, giving him a view that makes him throb even more. Itâs what he needs, as he focuses on his pleasure like you told him. He bucks his hips, finding his pace that quickens then slows down then quickens again, until his erratic movements signal that heâs close, too.
âYes, baby,â you urge him. âYouâre gonna fill me up so good. I want it so bad. Come for me, please baby.â
He does a few more thrusts before heâs spilling his warm seed inside you, with him moaning out curses every second. His cum drips from your hole but he catches it with his tip, pushing it back inside you until so is he. He stays there for a while as you both catch your breaths, with him collapsing to your side while you move along with him. You can still feel his cock pulsate against your walls, and it causes you to moan. Youâve never felt that before, and itâs another intimate thing you share with him, as he wraps his arm around you and languidly kisses you after.Â
âThat was amazing,â he breathes out.
âIt was,â you hum, smiling at him looking spent and content. âI like you here. Stay a while, please.â
He chuckles at your request but he doesnât mind it either. Itâs intimate, as all things with you beyond sex are. He just wants to stay close to you, to hear your soft breaths and revel in the feel of you, sweat and slick included.Â
But as much as he could fall asleep here, he knows he shouldnât. He pulls away and lets you head to the bathroom to clean up. He follows soon after and he catches you on the sink, removing your makeup then turning to him once you hear him arrive.
âMy bodyâs kinda sore,â he says. âDo you wanna have a bath?â
âI wouldnât say no to that,â you smile. âBut we canât stay long. You have work tomorrow so you need to sleep soon.â
âAlright,â he nods, walking to the bathtub now. âIâll try to keep my hands off of you, then.â
Jungkook doesnât. And neither do you, even when you both head to the shower to rinse yourselves.Â
You curl in his arms right when he lays next to you, and despite all the intensity from earlier, you know that this will always be your favorite part - his fingers tracing patterns on your back, his lips constantly finding yours, and his eyes telling you all the other things that words or actions canât say. Heâs your safe place. You think from now on, heâll always be.
You wake up to your alarm the next morning, the ringing pulling out a groan from you; you havenât needed it this past week and you suddenly miss just sleeping in.
But itâs Monday, the start of a new week. Jungkook will be off to work and youâll have to go back to your own apartment and start preparing for your own job that will start next week. You manage to get yourself off the bed and his soft sheets and go to the bathroom to wash up.
Once you finish, you head out and immediately hear his grunts from where you are. You know heâs in the middle of his workout, so you peek inside the gym, finally shameless to be doing it this time. Heâs shirtless doing some arm exercise on his equipment, but he has his back turned on you so you stare at it instead, instantly feeling hot at the view of his broad shoulders and slim waist. His muscles contract with every movement and you remember how that felt when you held onto them last night to keep you grounded as he pounded into you from every angle.Â
His set finishes and he turns around and sees you, donned in his shirt and standing by the door. He moves to another machine, takes a seat, and starts doing a shoulder press while gazing back at you. Half of you is tempted to sit on his lap and kiss him stupid, but the other half wants to stay rooted on your spot to watch him.Â
The latter wins and you stand there, thighs squeezing at the sight and sound of him, as he grunts with his every push of the weights. His eyes donât move away from you and you just know heâs enjoying this, too, especially when he smirks once your mouth slowly opens.Â
âEnjoying yourself there?â He cocks an eyebrow. âYou like how I look? How I sound?â
âOh, shush,â you frown at being teased. âYouâre overdoing it. Youâre not that loud when you exercise.â
âSo you listen to me, huh?â He smirks again, walking towards you now. âHow did that make you feel?â
âI used to come here every morning, Jungkook. I couldnât not hear you,â you cross your arms. âAnd I just looked away.â
âYouâre not looking away now.â
âHow can I when youâre teasing like that,â you scrunch your eyebrows.Â
âIs it working?â
âWere you always this cocky?â You laugh now.
âNo,â he chuckles. âJust now. Only because I see your jaw dropping and your thighs squeezing.â
âAnd what are you gonna do about it?âÂ
âOh, donât challenge me like that,â he warns, caging you against the wall.Â
He eyes your lips but he bends down towards your chest instead, biting your pert nipple thatâs gotten so obvious under his cotton shirt. He nibbles on it briefly before swirling his tongue around it. You hiss, feeling the sensation all over your body with that small movement, and itâs what urges him to face you again.
âCute,â he whispers.
He licks your mouth, prompting you to open it and let him inside, and your moan at the taste of him is immediate. Your hands move on their own, pulling him by his neck then caressing his chest like itâs natural. You start to feel the dampness in your underwear and pull away, knowing that you canât fall into this early in the morning, and not when he has a job to go to.
âJungkook, you have work,â you say, hating that you have to cut this moment short. âIf we start thenâŚâ
âI know,â he sighs, given how you both canât seem to stop once you get into it. âIâll just do a bit more and then wash up. You can still watch if you like.â
âTempting, but Iâll be making us breakfast.â
âAnd whatâs on the menu?â
âFried rice,â you smile.
âFuck,â he groans. âNow I donât need to hide how much I enjoy that.â
You giggle and let him go then head to the kitchen where you work on making enough for tomorrow, in case he wants to have it again before he leaves. You brew coffee and work around just like you used to, but with a bit more freedom this time. You hum while you cook and prepare in excitement. Youâve learned that you like doing things for him, and this is one way that you could spoil him.
Jungkook exits his gym after some ab workouts and stretching, his heart racing in a different way when he sees you in his kitchen again. It brings him back to this past year of his weekday mornings and his favorite routine.
But youâre not in your work outfit this time, and it wonât be stolen glances or comfortable silence youâll be sharing. Thereâll be more, and though this wonât be the norm, given your own job that youâll be starting next week, Jungkook decides this is another favorite of his. He hopes for more moments of domestic bliss where itâs just you and him in his home, sharing meals and hugs and kisses in between.Â
He gives himself some time before he calls your attention, wanting to savor this first before he faces a busy week, one heâll have to go through without you.Â
âEnjoying yourself there?â You tease this time.Â
âYes,â he chuckles. âItâs just⌠nice to start a work week with you again.â
You smile softly at him, knowing that it hurt him to be without this for weeks. You show him the bowl of fried rice youâve made, and even youâre salivating. Perhaps itâs also because of the man standing in front of you, and the sight of him like this just never fails to take your breath away.
âItâs nice to start with this, too,â you gesture towards the food. âItâs a new recipe but I think youâll like it.â
âIâm sure I will,â he smiles back, following you to the table and sitting next to you.Â
He hums in satisfaction after the first spoonful. You watch him as he eats, endeared by the way heâs enjoying the dish despite looking like a whole meal himself.Â
You both finish and you clean up while he takes a bath, quickly dressing yourself then heading to his closet. Itâs no longer your responsibility but itâs a task you secretly enjoyed, so you put out a navy blue ensemble for Jungkook and set aside a few outfits that he can pack for his trips this week.Â
He walks in with a towel wrapped around his waist, and you stop yourself again from wanting to do anything. Itâs hard when he looks as good as he does at any time of the day, but itâs something youâll just have to get used to. You get to be around while he puts on his clothes now, and he doesnât seem to mind at all, given his teasing smile and soft laughter.Â
You stand in front of him and fix his necktie. His eyes flit from your fingers to your face, liking that heâs able to do that this time.
âYou know you donât have to do this,â he says. âBut⌠I like that you are.â
âItâs intimate, isnât it? Dressing someone?â You glance at him.
Youâve done something similar in the past, like when you fixed the creases of his suit or the time he put his jacket over you. They were so simple but they stuck with you, and something in you stirs as you do this for him now.Â
âIt is,â he smiles back, nibbling his lower lip.
You help him wear the coat then fix his tie again. You meet his eyes and then his lips before exiting the room, your gazes saying more than words could. He picks up your bags then you both walk to the car so he could drive you home before he heads to work.
âIâll see you tonight?â You turn to him.
âOf course. Iâll get to you at 6, is that okay?â
âYes, Iâll make dinner,â you smile.Â
He lets you go after a kiss and you head inside your apartment with all your freshly washed clothes and new shoes. Itâs a nice feeling being able to go through them and then fixing them in your closet. Itâs nice having this time for yourself, too. While you like being with Jungkook, you know itâs important to not forget how itâs like to be on your own.Â
You do your chores for the rest of the morning while talking to Soomin and Jimin on the phone, as youâre finally able to tell them most of whatâs happened since Friday night. Theyâre supportive, as they often are, and they seem to be looking forward to hanging out with him like you suggested.Â
You go out for lunch at a small noodle house before settling at a nice cafe where you read the book that Namjoon gave you. At mid-afternoon, you head to the supermarket to buy your groceries for the next two weeks, including tonightâs dinner. Thinking about what youâll make for him was easy; you just hope youâll do it justice, considering that itâs one of Jungkookâs favorite things to eat.Â
You donât hear much from him during the day. He messaged you during lunch time just to say he was eating out with Yoongi then asked how you were. He didnât respond after a few texts, which you didnât mind. You always felt that he wasnât the texting type, which is good because you arenât, either. Thereâs at least that level of understanding and expectation on both sides. You know of his tendency to hyper focus; heâs also a very busy man, which is why you know that when heâs with you, heâs focused on just you and nothing else, which is really what you prefer.Â
He calls when heâs on the way to you and before you know it, heâs ringing the doorbell and youâre being greeted by the said man who still looks impeccable after a long day. He hands you flowers and a bottle of champagne.Â
âYou didnât have to but this is lovely,â you smile at him.Â
You put the bouquet on a vase then place it on the coffee table. After taking his seat, you serve the dish that youâve spent the past few hours making, wanting to make sure that the meat is tender and flavorful. The beef looks so soft and the aroma is filling your apartment. You watch him after the first bite, your heart soaring when he smiles and hums in satisfaction.
âThis is so good,â he says. âReminds me so much of the beef brisket from that restaurant near the office.â
âGood. Thatâs what I wanted. That dish is your favorite,â you explain. âYou order it often. It was also the first dish you ever bought for me.â
He stops his movements and looks at you questioningly.Â
âIt was after the first board report submission,â you recall. âYou instructed me to buy the team lunch from that restaurant and this is what I ordered because you always did. I⌠I treat it as the first meal you got for me and I wanted to try making it for you.â
Jungkook remembers that day. You were surprised that he gave that instruction. You also made sure that the team enjoyed it and thanked him for it. He liked that you enjoyed it as well, but claiming that that was the first dish he got you is technically untrue. And heâs unsure if telling you the truth is a good idea, but he supposes itâs one he can share now.
âIt was actually pork cutlets with curry,â he says, prompting you to look at him questioningly. âIt was on my first day. I⌠I made you do so many things and you missed lunch.â
The memory comes back to you. He had you annotate documents and attend meetings and you were starving the whole day.
âRight. I stayed late that day and I think Yoongi got me dinner. How was thatâŚâ
You remember more. Yoongi had spoken with Jungkook before he left then came back with a rice bowl. Is it possible thatâ
âI asked him to get it for you and not say it was from me,â Jungkook interrupts your thoughts. âThe pastries during the meeting, too. Those⌠those were the first things I bought for you, all because I was guilty about how I treated you that day.â
You see the sadness and apology in his eyes. You suppose with how you both started, itâs easy to fall into a cycle of feeling bad about what happened, forgiving, moving on, and then remembering something again. But maybe itâs necessary this time, as you both get to know each other and settle in this new relationship. Mistakes will come up, and itâs on both of you to assure each other that itâs all okay.Â
So thatâs what you do, as you tell him youâre not upset when he asks if you are.
âI guess in a way, youâve always looked out for me,â you smile at him.Â
âI guess thatâs one way to look at it,â he sighs, wanting to be positive about it like you are.Â
But you donât want to dwell on the past. Youâve been apologizing to each other for days and you know youâll have to stop that at some point.Â
âYouâve been soft for me since the start, huh?â You wiggle your eyebrows at him in an effort to lighten the mood.
âI was attracted to you from the beginning,â he admits. âYou were nothing like I imagined and you kept proving me wrong. Iâd zone out when you spoke to me, Iâd hold my breath when you were close⌠so I detached myself from you and that hurt you in some ways. And I knew that was wrong so I fought the feelings and that made it worse.â
âWhat changed?â
âI hated seeing you have a hard time, whether it was because of me or not,â he says. âOne moment it was out of guilt and then the next⌠it was just about wanting to see you happy and safe. And then wanting to see all of that up close.â
âYou get to do that now,â you smile at him. âHappy, safe⌠thatâs what I am.â
âGood. Me, too,â he smiles back.
You continue with your meal while he talks about his relatively quiet but busy day and you talk about yours. Itâs nice being able to share mundane things that happened to you with someone who does the same.Â
The sadness in his eyes eventually disappears. He insists on doing the dishes this time and you both laugh as he navigates washing in the tiny sink. You sit on the couch with him, the sounds of the TV in the background merely white noise, and with your head on his chest and his fingers tracing patterns on your arm, you think that ending your days like this is a lot more peaceful and satisfying than being on your own.
âWhat time do you leave in the morning?â You ask.Â
â7,â he responds.Â
Heâs got a busy week ahead - a trip to Incheon then Busan tomorrow to do some promotions of the Arts Center, and then he goes straight to Japan on Wednesday for meetings with culture and tourism ministers. He comes back on Friday evening, and thatâs four days without you. It may sound silly, but thatâs four days too long. He managed before though, but then again, he didnât have much to look forward to after other than seeing you once he returned. Now, itâs that and so much more.
âI canât believe that we just got together and now we have to do LDR,â he shakes his head.
This causes you to laugh. You angle your head and look at him, with your arms wrapped around his waist now.Â
âWow, Mr. Jeon. I didnât think you were that dramatic,â you tease.Â
Heâd laugh back because he really does sound silly, but the way your soft eyes gaze at him makes him feel a little more sentimental. And definitely honest. Â
âJust wanna be with you, thatâs all,â he shrugs.
âYouâre clingy and needy and cheesy too,â you laugh, kissing his cheek after every word.Â
He groans and youâre endeared by how he pouts at you. Heâs definitely been expressive about how he feels, but youâll be apart for the next few days. Youâll be outside your little bubble of affection this time and now have to learn how to balance your relationship with every other responsibility you both have. But you want to assure him just like you hope heâd assure you.
You climb onto his lap, interlock your fingers with his, then smile at him.Â
âI like it because itâs you,â you whisper. âAnd I like you a lot. And I wanna be with you, too. But you have duties and so do I. So youâll get through this week and do well in those appearances and meetings, and then I can meet you on Friday for dinner and spend the weekend together. Does that sound good?â
âIt does,â he smiles back, kissing your hand that has your heart racing because of how tender he does it. âIâm not really uh, a texting kind of person, but let me know how youâre doing, okay? We could talk at night and you can tell me how your day went.â
âI will. And you can tell me, too.â
You nod in agreement and hug him. Youâre flushed against his chest and thereâs just so much comfort in this. You exhale a deep breath as you feel relaxed, especially when he starts to rub your back. Itâs calming, until his hands slip underneath your shirt and his touch slowly rouses you. You feel his desire as he hugs you tightly, and now all you want is for those hands to touch everything else, and for yours to do the same.
You sit back up then pull him forward for a deep kiss, cupping his face and inhaling him, tasting him, feeling him. You slowly unknot his loose necktie, and you feel him smile against your lips, knowing exactly what comes next. You pull away and let him lean back, giving you the space to unbutton his dress shirt while youâre snug on top of his length, liking the bit of friction you feel while you expose more of him to you.Â
You reveal his torso, and he watches you admire him from this view. Youâre stunning like this, especially with the desire for him painting your face. Your hands map out his body, and he tries to steady his breathing but to no avail. Itâs only been a few days but he doesnât think heâll get over how your touch affects him anytime soon, not when it ignites something feral in him.Â
But heâll take his time just like you seem to be doing. Even your kisses on his neck and chest are slow and tender, as if youâre savoring all this, knowing youâll be without it for a few days. Youâll both have to be outside this bubble of safety while heâs away, and he supposes itâs the start of how things will be from now on. But heâs excited for it, if his week will start and end this way. Itâs something he can now look forward to, and that carries with it excitement and relief.Â
Your lips trail south, the soft pecks being accompanied by your tongue and teeth doing more now. You start to rhythmically grind against his semi-hard length, and when you guide his hand under your shirt and on your breast, he lets out a low growl that has you biting your lip in anticipation.Â
Itâs what does it for him, and soon enough, youâre both undressed, moaning each otherâs names, and damp from sweat. Heâs holding you in his arms by the end of it, both your chests still heaving and minds probably hazy. But this is what he wants with you - this feeling of passion and overwhelming desire, of a kind of intensity that he hasnât felt in a long time. Or maybe even ever.Â
But he has to let you go, and when he does, thereâs that comfort he didnât think that letting you go would make him feel. Heâll go home knowing youâre thinking of him. Heâll go through his days knowing heâll be hearing from you. And heâll meet you eventually, knowing that it will be this same desire youâll be sharing and expressing, and thatâs definitely something he canât wait to do again.
Youâre a little disoriented when you wake up in your bed the next morning. Itâs not soft sheets that you bury yourself into this time, but then again, the body soreness is quite familiar. Itâs something you donât mind though, not when you know the reason why.
Itâs only been a few days but Jungkook just seems to know your body. He seems to really like it, too, with the way he takes his time kissing it, caressing it, and praising it. He knows just how to work his tongue on your most sensitive parts to make you reach your peak. He knows just how much strength to exert, or how deep he should go in what angle, and when to increase his pace or slow down. He knows just what to say, vulgar or otherwise, or when to look at you tenderly or as if heâll devour you, or when to grip you tightly and when to hold you softly.Â
And heâd done all of that last night. While your tiny couch could only make you do so much, you both still knew what to do whether you were on top of him, on your knees, or under him.Â
It was definitely a good way to say goodbye, and he wouldâve gone another round if it wasnât for you convincing him that he had to go home so he could pack his things and be ready for an early trip. You donât want him to be too tired then oversleep, and youâre glad that he didnât.Â
You check your phone and see that he messaged you at 7:15 to say that he and Mr. Ri have already left and are on their way to Incheon. Heâll attend a meeting and then appear at an event before they take the long drive to Busan for another event where heâll present the Arts Center and make a speech. Heâll spend the night there before an early morning flight to Tokyo. Itâs the first of many post-opening promotions heâll be doing, and you know thereâll be more of these business trips that youâll have to get used to.
But you donât mind being alone this time, not when you have your own preparations and rest to do, and not when you know that youâll be hearing from him at the end of the day. Thereâs the weekend youâll be looking forward to with him.Â
Your mom had reminded you during a brief call yesterday about making sure you preserve your independence and identity, and you tell her that you always had.
âYes, because those relationships were different,â she said of your exes. âYou did that because you didnât want to share much of yourself with them. But with Jungkook, you are, and itâs also the first time. Just⌠make sure to hold onto the things that made you happy before him, and he should, too,â she advises. âShare them, but donât forget them. Donât lose what makes you, you.â
Itâs wisdom from someone whoâd gone through relationships herself, whoâd loved and lost and loved again. And itâs a good reminder.Â
This is all new to you, and you suppose itâs easy to fall into this trap of dependence with your partner, of the honeymoon stage and the giddy, euphoric parts of romance. At the end of the day, Jungkook still has duties and you have a new path to take on. Youâll both have days of being too busy, too tired, maybe a bit frustrated, too. Youâll need to ground yourself in other ways and like your mom had said, not depend on the other person to always make things better, even if most days they could.Â
Itâs the same thing that your next-door neighbor tells you when you decide to have lunch with her after she lures you with some grilled fish. She tells you about the encounter with Jungkook and you narrate how you got together. It may all seem too much, too soon and now that youâre apart from him, maybe it is. Maybe itâs also just all the emotions you both kept in finally being expressed.Â
And you think that maybe itâs also good that you have this time for yourself to remind you of all the other things you enjoy in life. Now you donât have to treat them as substitutes for what you really desire because you already have that connection and intimacy youâve been yearning for. You get to truly feel the joy of immersing yourself in your interests, and you suppose thatâs one way to not lose yourself.
So you go back home and tend to your plants. You go to the theater and watch a local film and not feel like youâre escaping your life or anything this time. You bake cookies after your chicken in broth dinner because itâs something youâve always wanted to try.Â
You share all these things with Jungkook later that evening while youâre on a video call with him, including what your mom and neighbor had said.Â
âI was a little down that youâll be away but now I⌠Iâm thinking I shouldnât be,â you say. âIâll always miss and think about you but I donât want to feel like I miss myself when Iâm with you. Am I making any sense?â
âYou are,â he smiles on the screen. âItâs the same reason why you didnât want me to miss my meeting with my father and cousin yesterday. I still have a role. Now that Iâm with you, I feel like Iâll stop feeling like that weighs me down. It used to because all I was was tied to that title. I didnât feel like I was anything else.â
You think about his words and how resigning felt liberating for you. Beyond feeling indebted, itâs clear to you that you felt stuck because itâs all you knew to do; being an assistant was all you knew how to be. It wasnât just the stress or the pressure because you know every job you take will have those. In fact, you look forward to it in your new position. You realize that you like working, you like the hustle, you like the grind. But if itâs all you do, you lose the joy.Â
Now, you have a hand to hold and a warm body to wake up to. You have someone to share your days and joys and frustrations with. You have someone to laugh with and cry to. And so days on your own feel like much-needed time to enjoy things you prefer doing by yourself. And work could feel more challenging in a good way, pushing you to be better and seeing what else you could accomplish. Somehow, being with Jungkook makes you feel like thereâs so much more you could do because at the end of the day, thereâs someone to celebrate with, to share your thoughts with; thereâs someone to cheer you on and support you.
You tell him all this and he seems to reflect on it as well.Â
âThe councils were very impressed with the Arts Center,â he says after a while. âThey said itâs a good complement to their efforts of promoting local artists because of the opportunities for exhibitions. At that moment, I felt proud of what weâve done. And it reminded me of why I wanted to focus on this aspect of the job. I always told my parents that I wanted to be responsible for the creative side of the company and I am but it felt so heavy even if I asked for it. I donât have to carry that pressure with me all the time. I get to take a break from it when Iâm with you and I think thatâs made me enjoy it more.â
Itâs a realization Jungkook had on the way home after that dinner meeting with a local artist in Busan. She talked about envisioning her pieces displayed in a space like the Arts Center and he felt that joy of being able to create something for others to be a part of. Structures are beautiful on their own, but then the meaning deepens because of what they mean for users; the sense of fulfillment is different. He supposes that heâs able to appreciate that part of the job even more now.Â
âThatâs good for us, then,â you hum, as you slowly succumb to sleep. âI have quite the day tomorrow and so do you. Rest now, Jungkook. And Iâll talk to you again.â
He says goodbye with such softness in his eyes. You miss him, but youâre happy that heâs able to experience all this on his own, too. Hearing him talk about it is different than witnessing it yourself and thatâs perhaps the joy in being with someone. Itâs not just about experiencing what they experience; itâs also about being on the receiving end when they try to make sense of it.Â
Maybe thatâs what partnership is about, and you canât imagine sharing all this to anyone else but him. And thatâs the difference this time. This is a person you admire and who admires you back. Heâs someone you could trust and feel safe enough to be your true self with, and after tonightâs conversation, you feel like youâre that same person for him.
You wake up early enough the next day and manage to send Jungkook a message wishing him well on his flight to Tokyo. He gives you a call as heâs about to board and says he has so many things lined up this Wednesday but that heâll talk to you again in the evening. Itâs a promise of tonight despite the distance, and you suppose that makes all the difference for him this time.Â
You go about your busy day, too. You make yourself a simple breakfast and then head to Rkive Publishing for your onboarding. You requested this to be done earlier so that you could focus on your tasks when you start on Monday, and Namjoon gladly agreed to your request.
He introduces you to Won-woo, your co-production officer whoâll be handling projects alongside you, and to the associates and assistants whom youâll manage to get the books ready for selling. The team seems a lot more relaxed than what youâre used to, and they share your excitement in working together soon.
Namjoon shows you your desk and turns over your laptop. He introduces you to the rest of the staff and lets the HR go through all the administrative matters with you. He gives you a folder with all the existing and upcoming projects that the associates prepared, including the processes and suppliers list, as well as your teamâs personnel files.Â
You smile at the documents because preparing these used to be your job, and now youâre at the receiving end of it. Itâs a different feeling, but being here today excites you even more.Â
You join them at a book launch and take notes of how itâs being run. As a small company, planning these events is done by a special team composed of a staff member from every department but there isnât really someone who manages it. Thatâs a responsibility given to you because of your background, and itâs a challenge youâre willing to take. You have more freedom this time and you have ideas. You observe how Namjoon and the other managers engage with the author and his team. Itâs definitely different from what youâre used to, and you feel thereâs more sincerity in these people than the millionaires you had to deal with at your old job.Â
You feel accomplished at the end of it, and itâs something you share with Jungkook again that evening when you eat your Chinese takeout while he munches on some dessert over the phone.Â
Not wanting to stay home the next day, you go to a park and finish reading your book. You decide to go to the library at the Arts Center and go through the project documents. You walk around, too, able to take in more of the surroundings with the sun still out. Itâs a calming place that has you coming up with ideas for book launches, as you take note of the indoor and outdoor spaces that could definitely hold those types of events. You feel fulfilled, and itâs something you share with Yoongi during dinner later that night.Â
You share it with Jungkook, too, over a late evening video call after he had drinks with some business partners. He sounds quite tipsy, and he goes on about having your lemon ginger tea that you convince him to ask room service to make. You remind him of his lunch breakfast meeting and afternoon flight, and tell him that you could both meet for dinner after he clocks out of work.
Itâs what you do the next day, as you wait for him at a French restaurant that you reserved for tonight. You turn around when he calls your name, and your smile is immediate when he comes up to you and hugs you tightly. He sounded tired when he called on the way here, and you suppose that he hasnât really properly rested these past few days. Heâs been going from one meeting or event to another, and heâs said before how the socializing drains all of his energy.Â
You feel that now, as he exhales deeply while his arms wrap around you.Â
âLong week, huh?â You say after you both take your seats.Â
âCrazy,â he shakes his head. âTalking about the plans was exciting but the actual talking was tiring.â
He goes on about how the rest of his trip went and you laugh at his commentary about all the people heâs met and his observations. You realize just how much is on his mind, and it reminds you of all the times that youâd seen him look detached when in fact, heâd been making notes and plans in his head.Â
Once the food arrives and you salivate at the dishes, he says heâll stop talking about work now.
âItâs part of your day. Why should you stop talking about it?â You turn to him with a pout.
âI donât want to bother you about it.â
âBut I like hearing you talk about it,â you say. âI like knowing whatâs going on in that brilliant mind of yours.â
âThereâs always too much going on inside it,â he laughs. âI donât always know how to make sense of them.â
âItâs because you donât talk about them,â you point out. âIâm here to listen. I always am.â
He smiles and shares what happened today during the meeting he had with the team to discuss all the proposals theyâve been getting with regards to promoting the Arts Center. A subsidiary company is handling operations and marketing, but other than the planned partnerships with the Culture Ministry and the International Film Festival organizers, Jungkook didnât expect other industries, as well as local and foreign companies and institutions, to want to partner with Jeon Corporation as well, specifically him.Â
He had a phone meeting with his father and Hoseok during the drive from the airport about how they can strategically go about this but that requires more canvassing and research. This is something they can tap on, and itâs good for the company image and sustainability. Residential and commercial infrastructure have always been their expertise but they can build on the cultural sides of property development, too, and Jungkook would be at the forefront of that.
âMonitoring the Arts Center is a big task in itself. Iâm gonna have to set a plan for how the VP Office is going to handle it, among many other things,â he says.Â
âMaybe itâs time to revisit each team memberâs portfolio and responsibilities,â you suggest. âUnder Hoseok, only Manager Lee and Chin-sun directly handled projects, but they were all small ones so they could handle multiple. Do-hyun and Yohan managed all administrative affairs and I oversaw a bit of everything. Monitoring the Arts Center might require more than one person so maybe Chin-sun could do it with Do-hyun as a form of mentorship. You have the call to give projects to the young ones now, and maybe add another person to help with administration and events planning. Lucas could need that support.â
Jungkook is quiet and youâre afraid you mightâve crossed a line by advising him on what he could do as VP. You may have been his assistant but that doesnât mean you could just go on and suggest things. You donât even know if itâs appropriate to do this. He didnât even technically ask for your opinion.Â
Youâre about to apologize when he speaks.
âThose are great ideas. Iâll be meeting them about their development and professional goals soon. Maybe I could align expanded responsibilities and portfolios with that,â he hums. âAnd mentorship is good, too. Hoseok said he planned on doing that but he had to oversee so many projects that it got pushed back so maybe I can institutionalize that now. And yeah, Iâm seeing now that weâd need another person to ease the load off the others. I donât want them to be overworking and actually, neither should I.â
A smile forms on your face as the ideas come flowing. He probably had thought of those already but needed a sounding board outside of the team. That would usually be his assistant but if itâs about them, heâd need another person for it.Â
âIâm sorry Iâm bringing this upon you,â he shakes his head. âThatâs⌠thatâs not your job anymore. Youâre not my assistant anymore. I donât want you to think that Iâm using you for that.â
You didnât really think of it that way but you donât blame him for thinking about it. You did accuse him of wanting you to stay for the convenience of it, and maybe thatâs still weighing on him.
âI donât mind,â you assure him. âThis is new territory for us, I guess, and itâs something we have to learn to navigate but this is important to you, which means itâs important to me, too. If we treat it like that, then itâs all okay.â
You caress his hand to assure him, and his smile says he understands. Heâll seek advice from his father, he tells you, and youâre glad that heâs actively working on that relationship personally and professionally.Â
âHow are you feeling about your first day?â He asks, his hand on your bare thigh now while you eat the chocolate mousse dessert. âDo you feel like youâre ready?â
âIâm really excited. And I think Iâm ready to just get on with it,â you smile. âBeing there last Wednesday helped, and I just have all these ideas for the projects weâve got lined up. I⌠I even thought of having book launches in the Arts Center. As long as, you know, itâs not a conflict of interest or anything.â
Your shy smile endears him, and he assures you that itâs not a problem. Youâre just using your network. At the end of the day, itâs still the managing companyâs call and your own bossâ decision. But you end up bouncing off ideas with him, too, like the Arts Center hosting writing workshops or spoken poetry sessions with the authors whose books youâll be publishing.Â
âWe make a pretty good team, donât we?â He says after youâve finished dinner and youâre walking to his car. âWeâre out here just coming up with these ideas.â
âWe work pretty well together so itâs not a surprise,â you smile at him. âI like that thereâs no pressure, too. And that we could just share these things with each other, you know?â
âThatâs true. I mean, Iâm not assessing you or anything,â he laughs. âBut I can openly admire you for it. And then think itâs sexy when you use publishing terms that I donât understand.â
âSo thatâs what you want, huh?â You giggle. âI mean, I understand. Itâs how I am with you.â
âAh, so you find it sexy when I talk about the blueprints and design stuff, then?â He teases.Â
âI do,â you smirk. âA hot guy with a big brain? Of course thatâs sexy.â
âHmm, thatâs nice to know,â he says, caging you against the door of the car.Â
His eyes soften as he takes you in and you mirror the way he looks.Â
âIâm happy I get to be with you again,â he whispers, his lips inching closer to yours.Â
âMe, too,â you whisper back. âAnd I get to sleep and wake up next to you.â
âThatâs always a good plan,â he hums, kissing you deeply, something he could definitely do in an empty basement parking that he couldnât do at a restaurant.Â
You fall into him immediately, and all you want is to do this without worry. âDo you mind if we spend the night at my place?â You suggest. âItâs closer.â
He laughs when he pulls away but agrees that getting home as quickly as possible is a good idea. You both enter the car and his palm is glued to your thigh again and you feel the desire heighten now that youâre alone.
Once the door of your apartment shuts, his hands are all over you immediately. Youâre undressed by the time you make the short walk to your dining area, and before you could breathe from your rough kissing, youâre whimpering already with how his tongue expertly laps up your sopping cunt.Â
Youâre bent on the table one minute, coming on his mouth and then the next, youâve got your leg on it while he pounds you from behind, his mouth on your neck and his hands on your breasts.Â
You go another round in your tiny bathroom, and then another one on the edge of your bed before youâre able to properly lie on it. Youâre spent after another quick shower, but itâs worth it when he fucks you as good as he does, especially after not seeing him for a few days.
Youâre laid on your side, facing him who does the same. The lamp from your living room is the only source of light you have, but itâs enough for you to see his face and the smile that paints it as you explain that your bed is not as comfortable and your sheets are not as soft as his are. He says that heâll get used to it, but you insist on passing up on your apartment next time because itâs definitely not sex-conducive unlike his penthouse. He laughs at your comments, saying that he could have sex with you anywhere and it would still be amazing.Â
But that cheekiness quickly fades away, and the anxious look in his eyes starts to worry you.
It takes a while but you hear it - the pitter-patter on your window that slowly starts getting louder. You turn around and watch helplessly as the drizzle turns to a downpour in seconds, and you rush out of the bed to close the curtains.Â
Jungkook looks uneasy - his jaws are clenched, his eyes flit from the window to you, and his breathing starts to quicken. His body shrivels, as he pulls the covers tight around him and you canât imagine how anxious he feels. You turn on your speaker and put on some soft music to hopefully drown out the sounds. It works only a little, and youâre reminded of all the times that you felt powerless and unable to give him comfort.
But thatâs not the case now, as his words prompt you to move.
âCome here, please,â he mumbles. âI need you with me.â
You return to your spot next to him, and he loosens his hold on the blanket to let you in.Â
âIâm here, okay?â You whisper, cupping his face and looking at him in the eyes. âIâm not going anywhere. Youâre safe with me, Jungkook.â
His eyes soften a bit before they close, and you cover his ears with your hands the way you did all those months ago to block out the noise. It works, as his breathing starts to slow down. But his hold on your arms tightens, and you feel that he needs you as an anchor to get through this, so you shift up and let his arms wrap around you. He finds purchase in your neck while you caress his back, and you pace your breathing with his to let him know that youâre with him, and that youâre not letting him go.
The thunder doesnât come, but you hold Jungkook the entire night to tell him that youâre there to comfort him even when the storm has passed. You drift to sleep once you hear his soft snores, letting his warmth envelope you as well.
You awake the next morning laid on your stomach like you tend to be, with only the warmth from the blanket covering you. Youâre no longer hugging Jungkook. He also isnât next to you.Â
You shift on your back and then find him by the balcony, the curtains open now, allowing you to see the clear skies outside. He stands looking out, with a faraway look in his eyes the way he had the day after his nightmare. You watch him for a while, wondering whatâs on his mind, if the fear still remains, or if your comfort helped him get through the night.
He senses youâre awake, so he turns around and faces you. Thereâs a softness in his eyes now and you wonder where thatâs from.
âHey,â he greets. âDid the light wake you?â
âNo. The empty space next to me did,â you say softly, sitting up on the bed now.
âIâm sorry. I⌠I had to exercise a bit to expend the negative energy,â he explains.Â
âWhat did you do?â You wonder.Â
âJust some push-ups and lunges. I didnât want to disturb your sleep. You looked pretty peaceful,â he smiles.
âI donât even know what time I slept. But it wasnât long after you did. How do you feel?â
âBetter. It was one of those nights, you know?â
You nod, suddenly overcome with a wave of sadness and regret. He notices the change in your expression and sits on the edge of the bed facing you.Â
âHey, is everything okay?â
You look at him with a pout. âI asked you to come here. Then it rained. And I know how you like to workout in the mornings and I have nothing to offer here.â
âYou know you canât control the weather, right?â He nudges your knee. âI wouldâve asked if we could come here if you hadnât because it was closer. And you⌠you were all I needed last night. I held onto you like a lifeline, ___.â
âYou did,â you nod, appreciating his words, even if heâs not the one who should be comforting you after what happened. âIâm glad I could do that for you. I guess Iâm just⌠a little ashamed because this is all I have andââ
âBaby, Iâm gonna stop you there before you say anything else,â he says, scooting closer to you and tilting your chin so you could look at him. âThis is your home and I⌠I know you donât just let anyone in. I like being here. I like being with you. And last night, that will be one of many. I know I wonât be going through that on my own anymore.â
âI canât control the weather, right?â You repeat his words. âWhat if it happens and Iâm not with you?â
âIâll just imagine that you are,â he hums. âAnd then I can head to you the next day and Iâll feel better. And thatâs⌠thatâs new for me.â
âOkay,â you mumble, thankful that youâre able to give him as much comfort and safety that he does with you. âIâm just here even if Iâm not around.â
âI know,â he smiles, leaning close to kiss you.Â
You give him a soft one then pout again, saying you still have to brush your teeth, so he lets you go and you scurry to the bathroom. You return to your bed with him lying on his back now, his arm folded behind his head as he gestures to the space next to him. You climb up and lay on top of his chest, kissing him languidly as his arms wrap around your waist to hold you in place.
Heâs gentle with the way his tongue rolls around with yours, and with how his hands stroke your back as theyâve snuck underneath your shirt. Thereâs something about the rare cool morning that has you wanting to just lazily make out with him while you feel each other up.
And thatâs exactly what happens. You hum and giggle against each otherâs lips, and your hand maps his torso while he palms your waist down to your thigh.Â
Laying on his chest now, you turn to him.
âIâm nervous about tonight,â you confess.
âBaby, you know my parents. And you know they like you,â he says, turning to you. âEven you think that they already approve of you.â
Itâs true, you remind yourself. They have always been kind to you. Youâve had several conversations with CEO Jeon and he was the one who showed you the library. They also sounded excited about dinner when they called Jungkook last week, but being around them in a different context this time makes you anxious.Â
âApproval is one thing but meeting expectations is another, and thatâs what Iâm worried about,â you explain. âThey know me as an employee but not as the woman youâre, uh, currently seeing.â
âYou mean dating.â
âYes, that,â you shyly smile. âI worked for their family and now Iâm⌠dating their son. And there are standards to that.â
âStandards that you already meet,â he assures you. âFor all that my parents are, I at least know that what matters the most to them is that Iâm with someone who genuinely wants me, and considering how you canât get your hands off me, I know you do.â
You laugh at this teasing but you donât deny it.Â
âYouâre quite irresistible, if Iâm being honest,â you giggle. âIâm still getting used to the fact that I could, uh, do all this with you.â
âWell, I hope you donât get tired of it. Because I wonât.â
âLook at you being good with words and all,â you smirk. âYou surprise me, Mr. Jeon. I canât wait to know what else is inside that heart of yours.â
âMe, too, actually,â he hums, realizing that thereâs still so much he doesnât know about what heâs capable of doing and feeling this time around. âI guess we can find out together.â
You smile at his honesty and think the same. Youâre on this journey of learning what your heart can do and heâll be the one to show you that.Â
You lay in bed with Jungkook for the rest of the morning, having short naps and then lazy make out sessions before deciding to wash up. You eat at a cafe for lunch then head to his place this time. He works out for a bit then joins you on the couch as you watch a show before you both prepare for that dinner at his parentsâ estate.Â
Mr. and Mrs. Jeon warmly greet you when you arrive. They lead you to the dining room and you tone down your amazement at the spread before you. There are all types of meat and seafood and other fancy dishes that get you curious, something Jungkook seems to notice as he fills your plate and tells you to let him know what else you want more of.Â
âDonât be shy, dear,â his mother says. âHave as much as you want. We want you to feel at home and comfortable, okay?â
âYes, Mrs. Jeon,â you smile.Â
You try to loosen up but still act proper, not wanting to give the impression that youâre uncultured and ignorant. Their family has so much experience of traveling the world and you want to show that you can keep up, that youâre worthy of sitting and walking alongside them and their son. You seem to be doing okay, but you donât realize how nervous you really are until you feel Jungkookâs hand wrap around your own and then his fingers interlocking with yours.
Heâs warm and stable, and when you tighten your grip, you see him smile from your periphery. You smile as well, wanting him to know that you appreciate the encouragement heâs giving. And it helps, as once youâre asked about your new job, you feel yourself relax in his hold, until he slowly lets you go, showing you that youâre doing well and can hold your own.
You talk with confidence and excitement about the publishing house and your responsibilities. Jungkook watches you beam when you mention your upcoming projects and the things youâre looking forward to learning, and he thinks youâre incredibly beautiful like this. Itâs new and exciting for him, too, and itâs at this moment when all the pain and frustration from losing you the first time that it all feels truly worth it.Â
Jungkook doesnât expect to be as engaged as he is once his mother asks about his trips this past week. Oftentimes heâd give simple and straightforward answers, but with you around, thereâs this new kind of comfort and feeling of openness towards his parents. Perhaps itâs gratitude that they helped you and your mom all those years ago. Maybe itâs also you, because being around you makes him want to be better. It might be both of that and more - it might also be him, realizing that heâs capable of receiving and returning the love of the two people who've given him the most.Â
After dinner, you all proceed to the sitting room outside that overlooks the garden. You settle with a flute of champagne and sit next to Mrs. Jeon, appreciating the moon casting over the grand space filled with big trees and flower beds and a fountain.Â
âIâve added more outdoor lights,â CEO Jeon informs Jungkook as they sip their glass of whiskey. âIâll show you the new ones.â
Jungkook nods and gestures to you that heâll just go with his father. You watch them head out and walk around, with the older man pointing to different posts and seemingly explaining the lighting. Jungkook engages with him, and compared to what youâd witnessed in the past, his body language this time is no longer of detachment.
âYouâve done so much for our son, ___,â his mother breaks through your thoughts, prompting you to turn to her. âI hope you never doubt your place in this family. I know itâs all new and itâs just been a week but I want you to feel like you belong here, with him and with us.â
âThatâs an honor to give me, Mrs. Jeon,â you respond in gratitude. âPlease know that I wonât take that for granted.â
âI feel more grateful that youâre around,â she faintly smiles. âWeâre just like most families, you know? I donât want to be ignorant in saying that but we⌠We have our troubles. We never say enough, we say things we donât mean, we let distance keep us apart, we love but we donât show it the right way. But we try. We try with our sons but it doesnât always get through. I always feel like too much has happened and we just never knew how to make up for it.â
âI think Jungkookâs seeing that now,â you assure her. âHeâs told me about wanting to spend more time with you, to celebrate birthdays and holidays. It might take time but he wants to make plans. He wonât feel so far away from you anymore.â
âAnd we thank you for that,â she says. âWe didnât know how to make him open up to us and there are still things we donât know about him. We lost so many years and I⌠Iâve been hoping that in being back here, heâll give us a chance and now he has. And thatâs because of you. You showed him the good thatâs around him and you made him open up to those good things. All it took was you.â
âHe did the same for me,â you point out. âI carried a lot of pain, too, and Iâve only started to embrace the good things around me because of him. Your son has such a beautiful heart, Mrs. Jeon, and regardless of what happened, I know he took that from you, too,â your voice cracks now.Â
âOh, dear,â she huffs, taking your hand in hers. âYou have no idea how much it means to me to know that.â
She wipes the tears that form in her eyes and you give her a comforting smile.Â
âHe cares about you, Mrs. Jeon. And heâs slowly learning how to express that.â
âThatâs wonderful to hear,â she smiles. âI hope you always stay by his side, dear. It can get hard sometimes, as it is with all relationships. But⌠I hope you hold each otherâs hands throughout all of that.â
âIâm sure weâll learn that, too,â you nod.Â
You turn to where Jungkook and his father are and see that theyâve gone a bit further down. You ask his mother where they might be and she answers that theyâre probably by the playground, as new lights have been installed in that area, too.
âYou should go to him,â she urges. âThatâs such a special place for him and Iâm sure heâd want to show it to you.â
You nod and head out, your heart warming at finally being able to be in his safe space this time. You get there without catching their attention, and you look back at the humble structure before you, seeing the love that created it for a man you hold so close to you.
âThatâs such a lovely playground, Mr. Jeon,â you say, prompting both men to turn to you. âDid you build this all by yourself?â
âOh, I thought you were talking to me,â Jungkook states.
âYouâre only Jungkook to me now,â you playfully shake your head, although you donât miss the teasing way he cocks his eyebrow because you definitely still use the formalities as you please.
CEO Jeon laughs but gets back to your question. âI did. It was the first time I ever designed and constructed one and it took a while to do it. I had to figure out how to hide it from Jungkook because he would follow me out here that I had his mother take him to one of our properties in the mountains for the weekend just so I could finish it,â he laughs at the memory. âBut it was all worth it. He loved it as a child and it stood the test of time.â
âItâs because you maintain it, father,â Jungkook points out. âThatâs, uh, thatâs dedication.â
âI knew how much it mattered to you, and that mattered to me,â the older man hums. âI wanted you to have a place where you felt safe every time you were here. Maintaining it was my way of feeling close to you.â
You watch as both of them share a look of gratitude and acceptance, and though mending this relationship will also take time, you know that with this, itâs starting to.
âWell, Iâm sure Jungkook would love to show it off,â CEO Jeon smiles. âIâll leave you both to it.â
Youâre left alone with Jungkook now, and with his hand around your waist, you rest your head on his chest and hug him tight. You imagine a young boy running about, excitedly riding the swing and going down the slide and then sitting at his favorite spot while he draws buildings and the sky on his sketch pad. That same boy stands next to you now and holds you close, in a way sharing those memories with you as you stand in silence and take in the beauty of a humble playground.Â
Jungkook turns and kisses you on the forehead.Â
âThank you for tonight,â he whispers. âIâm glad youâre here with me.â
âAlways,â you smile. âThank you for taking me here.â
You know that for him, itâs not just about how you managed the evening with his parents. Itâs also more than just a celebratory dinner for the Arts Center. Tonight is a way for him to show his parents that heâs ready to receive all the good that theyâve been showing him.Â
And itâs his way of telling you that as long as youâre both navigating your pains and your fears together, everything is going to be alright.
You spent the rest of Saturday night curled in Jungkookâs arms as you both watched a horror movie on his living room couch. On Sunday, you slept in and cooked lunch together before he took you to a spa. He insisted on getting a massage to help you relax before your big first day, and with the steam room and afternoon tea included in the couples package, you couldnât say no.Â
He looked happy seeing you satisfied. There was something about the soft kisses and sensual touches that got you relaxed and definitely turned on. You had dinner out after that then he took you home where he stayed until you started dozing off, wanting to spend time with you as long as he can before another busy week.Â
Your alarm goes off on Monday morning and you immediately get up, feeling that excitement of your first day rush through you. Itâs a different feeling this time - youâll be establishing a new routine, be around a different set of people, exploring new food places to eat at for lunch, and your days will be filled with new tasks and responsibilities that you canât wait to get to.Â
Youâll learn new things and manage a team this time, and it will challenge you in so many ways. Youâll also engage with authors and artists, and you suppose that's what youâre most excited about - you want to connect with your inner self and your surroundings more, and to find peace and strength in other peopleâs words.Â
Looking at yourself in the mirror after your shower, you canât help but smile. Thereâs that joy on your face thatâs new. Thereâs a bit of fear, too, but even then, you wish Jungkook was here to see how excited you look, or maybe to remind you that things are going to be alright. He messaged earlier to greet you good morning and youâll probably settle with texts for now, as he might be on the way to work with Lucas next to him.Â
Wrapping a towel around your body, you head out the bathroom to dress up. But thatâs when your doorbell rings, and you freeze for a moment because youâre not scheduled to have anyone this early in the morning. It might be your neighbor. But it could also beâ
âBabe?â Jungkook calls from the other side. âAre you still there?â
You immediately open the door to let him in and you stare at him, all dressed and ready for work.
âHey,â you say, returning his kiss. âWhat are you doing here? Did Mr. Ri drive for you?â
âNo, I did,â he smiles. âI told him and Lucas that Iâll just meet them at the office and I wonât be in until around 9.â
âWhy?â
âWell, itâs your first day. And I wanted to get you breakfast. And drive you to work,â he explains. âMaybe ease your nerves if youâre a little anxious.â
You soften as you watch him lay out the pastries and cups of coffee on your dining table. You were just thinking about him, and now heâs here, making sure heâs got your first meal and transportation covered on this pretty important day.Â
âIâm actually quite excited,â you beam. âAnd Iâm really glad youâre here.â
âGood,â he smiles, taking his seat. âI⌠I know youâre a grown adult and all but I didnât want you to go through this on your own.â
You want to hug and kiss him at this moment but doing so while wrapped in a damp towel isnât a good idea. So you ask for a second and quickly wear your nightgown from last night, then you scurry towards him. You sit on his lap and bury your face in his neck, taking in his scent while your arms wrap around him.Â
His arms wrap around you, too, tightening his grip on your waist the more you curl into his body. He adores this giddy version of you, the one that melts in joy when he does something nice. Itâs wholesome, he thinks. He always believed you deserved that kind of care and treatment. Heâd spoil you with whatever you like, but itâs this tenderness that he learned from you, that he wants to try to keep showing.Â
You cup his face with your hands and kiss him softly while he palms your outer thigh as your legs lay on his lap. You pull away before you start to want more, grazing your nose against his instead then going to your seat.Â
The pastries look divine and you already feel energized. You thank him again for making the effort to buy all this and drive to you, and his proud smile makes the butterflies in your belly go off.Â
âDress up now,â he says once you finish. âIâll clean up here and make you coffee to-go.â
âOkay,â you mumble, leaving him to finally get ready.
Jungkook puts away the remaining food and wraps it for your breakfast tomorrow. He uses the coffee machine that his office gave as a farewell gift to make your drink that youâll be needing to get you through the rest of the morning. He glances at you and sees you choosing between two blouses. You turn to him to show both of them, your eyes asking which one you should wear.
âBlush,â he answers. âPairs better with the green.âÂ
He gestures towards the shoes next to your closet, the ones he got for you last weekend.Â
âThought so,â you smile, turning around to put it on.Â
He walks towards you as you tuck it in your beige slacks and look at yourself in the mirror. He watches as you tie the knot by the neckline of your top, aligning the bows constantly. You donât seem to be satisfied, as you pull the tails then do it all over again, straightening the bows once more. He knows you can do this even with your eyes closed, but a bit of help wonât hurt, especially as he senses that somethingâs causing you to be quite jittery.
âHey,â he calls out. âLet me.â
You meet his eyes in the mirror then turn around to face him. He tightens the knot and aligns it, and you watch him the whole time he does. Something about the way heâs focused on this makes your heart race, and you smile to yourself at how the roles have reversed.Â
But unlike how both of you used to stand still and hold your breaths when it was you on the other side, this time, thereâs calmness despite what youâre feeling.
âOkay, maybe Iâm a little nervous,â you admit, prompting him to look at you. âItâs just that⌠so much has happened for me to get here and I want to do it right. I want to do well. I donât want to fail at this, Jungkook.â
âAnd you wonât,â he comforts, cupping your face now as he looks at you tenderly. âYou worked hard to get here, to have this kind of freedom. You deserve to pursue what makes you happy, ___, and you deserve to want it, okay? Youâre gonna go there and impress everyone with your beautiful mind and admirable work ethic and kindness. And that boss of yours is going to constantly be thankful that you gave him a chance and didnât shut him out when he spoke to you at that bookstore.â
He thumbs your cheek as you slowly smile, and he mirrors your look of adoration.Â
âIâve seen what you can do,â Jungkook continues. âAnd this new role, this company⌠theyâll test you but I know you. Youâll make them believe in your capabilities and your vision. Your heart will make them trust you. And youâll lead them well; I donât doubt it one bit.â
âOkay,â you nod, feeling the warmth of his words all over your body.
Youâre thankful that he decided to come today, as you probably wouldâve stressed about so many things and then become anxious right as youâre entering the office.Â
But you arenât. You feel confident and excited and for the first time, you feel like yourself. Itâs not because youâre tying your identity and purpose to a job again, which is what pulled you down before. But right now, you donât feel the baggage of your past. You donât feel like youâre performing a role. You donât feel emptiness or disconnection from things and people around you.Â
Perhaps this is when you start to really get to know who you are - as a professional, as a leader, as a potential artist⌠Maybe as a lover and someoneâs partner, too, as you take what Jungkook is giving you. This is when you get to know yourself as a person and what you can give to others and how much you can receive. This is when you get to know yourself outside of what you do and let it be about what you feel and think and enjoy.Â
This is when it could be about what you love. And perhaps this is when you learn what your heart could truly do, and you canât wait to explore all that with him.
âThank you,â you mumble, exhaling a sigh of relief once you feel his soft lips against your forehead. âIâm glad Iâm not doing this on my own.â
Jungkook just smiles, content on seeing that joy and calmness on your face. You stop him when he pulls you to finally leave the house, and you think thereâs one thing you can do for him this time.
You align his necktie, and while heâs been doing it correctly recently, you canât pass up on this part of your routine together.Â
He smiles again and kisses your hand in thanks, then he leads you to his car where he drives the half hour to your office, all while your fingers are intertwined with his. Itâs calming and everything you need before your big day, one that will start with a meeting to prepare you for your operations planning at the end of the week.Â
Jungkook pulls over on the street and faces you. And just as youâre about to kiss him goodbye, he tells you that thereâs something he wants to give you as an added gift.Â
You look at him in warning because you said you didnât want anything else.
âItâs nothing grand, I promise,â he chuckles, as he retrieves a bag from the backseat.Â
He hands it to you and you excitedly peek in, feeling a wave of emotion as you hold up a snake plant.Â
âI heard itâs good for positive energy,â he says to fill up the silence in the car.Â
Heâs right because you told him that. And heâs been taking care of the one on his office desk, the one that you gave him for his birthday. He also told you the other day that looking at it now makes him feel your presence, as if youâre rooting for him even when youâre not around. You suppose thatâs what heâs trying to tell you, too.
âIt is,â you smile. âI heard itâs also good at reminding its owner that someoneâs always there for them.â
âI can confirm that saying,â he chuckles.Â
You lean over and give him a soft kiss.Â
âThank you, Jungkook,â you smile, feeling the calmness wash over you.Â
âYouâre welcome,â he smiles back. âNow go. You canât be late on your first day.â
You laugh and open the door. âIâll see you tonight,â you say before walking out.Â
You turn back and wave him goodbye one last time.Â
Itâs quite symbolic, as you think about Jungkook as happiness, dropping you off at a new place that already gives you another kind of fulfillment. You used to think there was only one way to feel it, that it only consisted of one thing or person.Â
You realize that happiness could be in many forms, and that the feeling of connection and intimacy is alive, itâs ongoing, itâs a constant pursuit thatâs both tangible and elusive, and it requires vulnerability; it requires strength.Â
As you enter your new office and greet your new colleagues, and as you place the plant with the âgood luckâ note on it on your desk and retrieve the supplies that your former team gave you, you see all the things that connect you to your past and the ones that clarify your new present. Thereâs so much to learn and unlearn - how to be good to yourself is one of them, and you canât wait for that, too.
âMs. Cho,â a deep voice calls out.Â
You look at the man in front of you and you both share a brief moment of silence before bursting in laughter.
âIt feels weird,â Namjoon says. He straightens himself before turning to you again. â___,â he corrects. âMeeting time, letâs go.â
Itâs casual and comfortable and everything you need. You donât want the formalities either, and itâs this type of environment that you truly believe will make you better.Â
You follow him to the meeting room and thereâs a wave of nostalgia that hits you, especially once you start taking minutes that you shouldnât be doing anymore.Â
You laugh to yourself. Maybe thereâll always be that person in you, but you donât pity her anymore; in fact, you admire her. Itâs her strength and grace that got you here, and you know itâs the same things that will make you appreciate and protect and fight for all the things that you have now.Â
That includes your job. That includes yourself. And that definitely includes Jungkook.
END.
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#jungkook fic#jungkook x reader#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x you#jungkook x oc#jungkook fanfiction#jeon jungkook#jungkook series#bts jungkook#boss jungkook
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Let's do a combination teaser / handwriting reveal!
#salome speaks#boss oc#my handwriting#im honestly so excited for this installment#its the reason i revived boss now#because they seemed like the person for the job
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Yandere Mob Boss x you
*This is inspired by the show called My Sweet Mobster! And this is just a short little drabble! I just quickly wrote this, so if thereâs any mistakes, I am probably going to fix it.*
Synopsis: Youâre a mommy blogger who shares your life on the internet, and unbeknownst to you, a terrifying and dangerous mob boss starts to watch all of your videos.
He just wanted to wind down for the day. There was nothing more tiring than coercing information out of stubborn little fuckersâpeople who were a huge threat to his empireâand ending up with nothing when they succumbed to their wounds from hours of torture. He sat in his huge California king bed with the softest sheets known to man, the air conditioning blasting at the perfect temperature for the room, and he scrolled through his YouTube recommendations.
He used the remote to flip through all the channels he had previously watched and liked. But one really caught his interest. He first rolled his eyes when he realized it was one of those mommy âbloggersâ who just boasted about how their lives were better than everyone elseâs, and how they conveniently got a pass to post the craziest and most intrusive things about their children. Kids getting exploited wasnât something he wanted to watch, and he was surprised to even see your channel show up on his flat TV screen.
The yandere mob boss mostly watched primitive cooking videos or those men who went out into the wilderness and built houses from the ground up. Although, he was too lazy to click on a button to skip your video, so he decided to give you a shot instead.
You were perfect. Too perfect. It was hard for him not to get sucked in and binge-watch every post you had made. He was absolutely enamored at the sight of you and your adorable children. He barely blinked whenever you came on the screen, and his eyes tried to get a good look and memorize your face completely.
You were just talking about how you liked to make things from scratch, how you kept a little garden in your backyard, and how you got the kids to help you out as a fun activity. He learned that the father of your children was a deadbeat who never wanted to do anything with the kids and left the moment he could. Judging by your frustrated tone in your âGet to Know Meâ video, you were upset that he had left you so soon and suddenly. It certainly wasnât easy for you at first, and you talked about how you wished you had a mentor to help you. Thus, this channel came to be. You wanted to help other women and help all the families that were going through the same thing as you. You were an amazing person, mother, and you gave helpful advice to all the new parents out there.
You were the total opposite of him. You were better.
You wouldn't kill people, you wouldn't threaten and torture them to the brink of death, and you were sickly kind and sweet to everyone. It was nauseating for the man to even think about dealing with hate comments (he got them daily from the news outlet), to edit and figure out what to do for each video, and you started to open his eyes and made him realize that you were practically superwoman.
The yandere mob boss was so grateful that you had posted about a hundred videos on your mommy blog. A hundred videos for him to see a glimpse into your life. There was nothing safe about how you were so open and honest, and certainly, you should have kept your mouth shut about the new place you were about to move into.
For someone who was a YouTuber, you knew nothing about internet safety. He took a mental note of how the interior of your new house looked, and you even showed a bit of the exterior and the neighborhood. He wrote down in his notes to remind himself to look for the exact house on Redfin or Zillow.
The yandere mob boss knew your two childrenâs names: Lila and Finn. Lila was the youngest of the two; she didnât look anything like you, which meant she looked like the baby daddy. It was a shame, really, that the cute small girl had to end up with genes from the horrible parent. The eldest stuck to you like glue. He clearly held a candle for his father still, and was having a hard time adjusting to the new lifestyle. Despite that, you continue to push on.
And so did he.
Yandere mob boss binge-watched all of your videos to the point where he knew everything there was to know about you. He knew all the schools you went to, all the partners (you were willing to share) you had previously dated, and he could feel his cold exterior start to crack when he let out a genuine laugh at your witty jokes. He spent hours, weeks, and now months watching your channel flourish and grow.
He smiled when you did. He too let out a sigh of relief after you saved your kid from tripping. He laughed, cried, blushed, and got angry when you did. The expressions and emotions he was feeling were all controlled by your content, and by you personally. You truly had him in the palm of your hand.
#Allurilove yandere writing#yandere mob boss x you#yandere mafia#yandere male#yandere oc x you#yandere fic#yandere drabble#yandere x you#male yandere x reader#yandere x fem reader#yandere x reader
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