#Billy had a first love named Trey

[onearmedlegend]

'Cause nobody wants to go it on their own

And everyone wants to know they're not alone

There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere

There's gotta be somebody for me out there

~GOTTA BE SOMEBODY BY NICKELBACK~

Billy was beyond sick and tired of trying to find someone. He had a person back in California, but knowing that it would come tearing down eventually already put a damper in the relationship. It was just a matter of seeing who’d break down first and cut the other loose.

Turns out Neil was the catalyst.

Trey was always a hopeless romantic; he loved giving roses and kisses on the knuckles at first greetings. It was nice to be loved after a long day of being pushed around by his father.

He also loved to write Billy letters. Pages and pages worth of declaring his undying love. Some of them were poems Billy swore could have been made into love songs.

And Billy kept those letters. They were sweet. He’d turn on the light after everyone was asleep and reread them.

One night, he was so tired that he fell asleep reading them. So, he didn’t hide them in time for Neil to come bursting into his room with sweat already falling down his face.

Panic and cold set in before Billy realized Neil was staring at five love letters, from a boy, sprawled along his bed covers.

With a huff, Neil turned around, opened Billy’s door, and stated, “Pack up.”

A week later, they were out of the house and trekking towards Hawkins, Indiana.

It was utter bullshit, and everyone else knew it. Max didn’t say goodbye to her father, Susan didn’t get to have a last meal with her girlfriends, and Billy couldn’t apologize to Trey and give him a goodbye kiss.

He wasn’t ever going to find someone like that again.

Neil pulled Billy aside before the first day of school, grip tight on his shoulder.

“Don’t fuck this up.”

Billy gulped. “Yes, sir.”

He patted him on that same pained shoulder and grinned maliciously. “Good, now go take Maxine to school.”

He tried. He tried, okay? Girls would bat their eyes at him and slap his arm playfully. They’d chew their gum and wink, hoping he’d follow them around. Or they would think he smiled too lovingly at them, and they’d prance behind him.

That stupid Steve Harrington came into Algebra 10 minutes late.

Billy shouldn’t have looked up, because then he wouldn’t have seen that shine in Harrington’s eye or that charm in his smile.

Harrington took his seat in the front. Then he proceeded to spend the entire class time cracking one-liners at the teacher. And this got the rest of the class to giggle at his will.

Billy mentally punched himself.

Max went missing. Neil told him to go find her; she was with Harrington. And three other boys her age. Nope.

He took his fight out on Harrington. If Billy was to feel pain, then he’d give it to the guy that reminded him of what he abandoned back in Cali.

Months went by, and the two didn’t talk. Billy knew when he walked by Steve Harrington in the hallways based on his shiny rich shoes.

They glared and nodded at The Palace parking lot. Turning up his music was the only way to forget Harrington was two spots down.

Billy would drop Max off at the movies instead of going in with her, especially because Harrington was to be their residential babysitter for the night.

Except one night, Neil is out late with Susan. Some dinner with his coworkers.

Billy didn’t hear much.

But Max was out at a movie with those nerds she spends all of her breathing time on. Billy decided to take a nap. He forgot to set an alarm, so when the doorbell rang and woke him up, he ran downstairs and ripped the door open in record time.

Max hit his shoulder as she walked inside. Harrington was with her. Billy choked on his spit when their eyes met.

Steve cleared his throat and pointed his thumb over his shoulder. “Movie was over, and I drove her back.”

“I see that.” Billy could tell he wanted to say something, and he admitted it—so did he. But where do you start with an apology for almost beating someone to death.

“Well, see you.”

“Whatever.”

Billy slammed the door in Harrington’s face.

That was how things usually ran. Next semester started, and they barely saw each other once basketball ended. Billy didn’t mind.

At first.

Billy missed having stare-downs. He missed giving Harrington a nudge when they saw each other around town with the kids. He missed shoving the guy around. He missed the actual half-conversations they’d managed to have.

What the hell is this.

Then Harrington graduated. Then Billy felt like his senior year was going to be boring as fuck.

Billy saw him at Scoops Ahoy, from afar. He never wanted to get too close. He wanted to apologize officially for his actions.

He couldn’t figure out what to say, though. So, he pulled a paper out from the back of his notebook and started writing.

Harrington,

I’m sorry I beat your face in. I was stupid and it was stupid and this is stupid.

Billy groaned and crumpled up the paper. He rubbed his face repeatedly, creating a rough red burn.

What do you say.

Then the summer happened. He was possessed by some creature and killed people. He even tried to kill the thing himself by standing up to it once and for all. Then it would kill him. Then he’d get redemption for himself.

He felt good about seeing that Max lived. Those other stupid kids. And Harrington. Thank God.

Yeah, he felt good about dying then. But he felt sad. He wanted to hang out with his sister and make up for the shit he pulled these last two years. Hell, the whole time they’ve known each other.

“I’m sorry,” he choked out.

Then he died.

Then he woke up.

A monitor was beeping at his side. His vision was blurry, but as he blinked it cleared up. The lights were blinding, Jesus.

What the hell. Where the hell. When the hell.

A nurse walked into the room with a plastered fake smile. But she asked how he was feeling.

Billy thought he said, “Who the fuck are you?”

What he actually said was.

Nothing.

People started coming in. Doctors, nurses, scientists? Everyone wanted to know what he remembered; what he saw, heard, smelt?

They wanted swabs of his spit for testing. He had to piss in a cup for testing, what the hell. After they were done picking and prodding him, an older man walked in.

He had a gravelly voice, good sense of humor, and something of a caring nature.

“Doctor Owens. How are we doing, kid?”

Billy glared.

“Ah, fantastic. Well, William, we’re going to keep you in here for a couple weeks. We good with that?”

Billy glared harder.

Doctor Owens chuckled and left the room.

Max came in a couple days after. Guess word got around. She ran in and hugged him tightly, apologizing for God knows what.

She pulled away, waiting for him to say something. Billy just smiled and waved her off.

“You can’t talk?”

Billy shrugged.

They spent a good, long time being in each other’s presence. A nurse brought in a notebook for him to communicate with everyone. So, Max would ask him how he was. Billy would draw a shit with flies. She would ask him when he gets out, and Billy would draw NEVER.

Max wasn’t pleased. She went home, but she promised she’d be in the next week or so.

The Chief came in. Asked how he was doing. Billy wrote, NOT GOOD. TIRED. The Chief nodded and took off his hat.

“Understandable. Did they tell you what happened?”

Billy shook his head.

The Chief sighed, took a seat, and explained what Billy wanted to be a nightmare.

The Robin girl came in. She had a box in her arms, so she dropped it on the ground. She folded her arms and bit her lip.

“How’s the bod?”

Billy snarled and wrote, FUCK OFF.

“So, it’s awful. Got it. Anyway. Brought you some books.”

She pulled out the Lord of the Rings trilogy, and Billy’s eyes widened. She laughed and placed them beside the bed on the drawer.

“Want me to read them to you?”

Billy ripped a piece of paper, crumpled it, and threw it at her.

She cackled as she waved goodbye.

Mrs. Byers came in. She brought in food. She winked and patted Billy’s hand.

“I was told by a little sibling that you liked lemon bars.”

Billy never loved his sister more. The thought freaked him out, but he was too busy stuffing his face with those dessert pieces.

Mrs. Byers clicked her teeth. “How are you, sweetie?”

Billy sighed, not wanting to answer the question anymore. But he grabbed his notebook and wrote, FINE.

Mrs. Byers definitely knew he wasn’t fine. But she didn’t push it. She just grabbed a lemon bar and held his forearm.

It was comforting.

El came in. She sat beside him, glaring. He glared back.

“You’re not good.”

Billy tried to laugh, but it was wheezy.

He knew he wasn’t a good person.

Not with how he left Trey without another word and came here to the middle of nowhere. He didn’t even send him a letter back.

Not of how much torture he put Max through all these years, especially these last two.

Not of Sinclair when he thought he was bad for Max and caused mayhem. Kid didn’t do anything wrong, Billy knows that.

He didn’t need to be reminded of beating Harrington, almost killing him last year. He wasn’t doing anything, and Billy thought he ruined everything.

Not of all the people of Hawkins when he was possessed and couldn’t fight it. All the confusion when he led them to that drasted place. Their screams when they were tied up.

He didn’t need to be told by a little girl that he almost fed to a large creature. A creature that would have literally eaten her alive.

He wrote, I KNOW. I’M A BAD PERSON.

El looked at his note and shook her head. “No, your body. It’s hurt. You’re tired. Have you rested?”

Billy laughed wheezier, and his coughs could be heard down the hallway.

Max came in that Friday.

Was it Friday. Jesus. What day was it anyway.

She brought in a deck of cards. For Solitaire, Black Ball, Go Fish. Just to keep him occupied in the middle of all the passing doctors to wear him out.

“Have you seen anybody else besides me?”

He nodded and wrote, POLICE CHIEF. ROBIN CHICK. MRS. BYERS. EL GIRL.

Max nodded. “Steve?”

Billy furrowed his brows and shook his head quickly.

“He hasn’t? He’s been wanting to check up on you.”

WHY.

Max shrugged. “He wants to thank you. And between you and me, I think he needs a guy to talk to.”

Harrington came on Saturday.

He looked like a literal kicked puppy; big brown eyes with a swollen purple bruise on the left. Fuck.

He took a chair and scooted it towards Billy. He sat down, stared at the wires hooked up to Billy, and opened his mouth.

Billy glared.

“Okay, I won’t ask you how you’re doing then.”

Billy let out a long, exasperated sigh. He took his notebook.

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYE.

“Oh, this.” Harrington laughed. “Russians.”

REALLY.

“Really. They got mean right hooks. That, and good poison to puke off of.” He laughed harder. “It was one hell of a high, though.”

Billy nodded and looked at his own hands. He didn’t know what to do with them. He didn’t want to look at Harrington and want him.

Because why would he want Billy?

Harrington bit his lip and tapped his feet on the ground. “Hey, man. I wanted to thank you for saving us.”

Billy looked at the window, away from Harrington. Harrington’s hand squeezed Billy’s arm. Billy ripped his hand off, shook his head, and tried to face away from the guy he knew he’d love if he knew him more.

“Okay, I get it. You don’t think you deserve this.”

Billy felt tears slip from his eyes.

“But I say that you do. The kids say. Your sister. El. Hell, if the whole world knew, they would say, too.”

Billy wrote in his notebook. I WANTED TO DIE. I WAS READY.

Steve sighed. “I know. But—”

Billy glared over his shoulder. Harrington saw how red his eyes were.

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

NO.

“Okay, good. Because I don’t want to go home.”

WHY.

“It’s too quiet there.”

They turned on the TV and watched it until the sun set. The nurse had come by for the night round and saw Harrington passed out in the chair. She almost tapped him on the shoulder, but stopped once she saw how Billy looked at him.

He didn’t want Harrington to go. He looked at the nurse and shook his head. She nodded and grabbed a blanket from the wardrobe they had set up by the door.

She made sure his medicine was replaced and running, tucked in his feet and poofed his pillows, and bid him goodnight. He waved at her with a gracious smile.

Steve finally looked peaceful when he slept. He looked like Sleeping Beauty, and that made Billy chortle.

He took out his notebook after a long time of staring. He started writing an apology.

Harrington,

I’m sorry for everything I ever put you through. I was an awful person. Hell, I probably still am.

My point is, I took so much of my anger out on you, and that wasn’t fair. I was so angry at how careless you were. Are.

But you care so much about everyone around you. The kids love you. Their parents love you. I think even that Byers dude with your ex loves you, too. That Buckley girl definitely loves you; you’re probably her best friend. I know her in school, she doesn’t have many friends to talk to.

Anyway, I appreciate all of what you’ve done with Max. You’re her second older brother. You’re doing what it’s hard for me to do. I’ll get there, I promise. Once I get out of that house.

Trey was my first love. He was amazing, funny, and charming. I loved him, I think. But I left him behind and I regret it.

Billy sighed. The pencil danced above the paper for a second. Then, he wrote the most heartfelt, honest words he’s said in years.

I’m not a good person. I know that. I want to be better, and I’m going to try. For the kids, for Max, and for you. Especially for you.

Because I want to love you. I want to take you out and dance with you. I want to kiss you on your doorstep and hope that you’ll kiss me back.

I understand that it will take time, and I want you to know that I want to wait. I can wait.

And I promise that I will love you.

Billy’s hands shook as he finished the letter. He looked at it once over before folding it and placing it on top of the Lord of the Rings.

He’ll give it to him tomorrow.

[piratealt]

TWST’s Favorite Neko Atsume Cats

This has been haunting me for weeks with no outlet. 33 characters + 2 bonus inclusions.

Heartslabyul

Riddle: 

Initially assumed the game would be too time consuming to attempt, but downloaded it after learning that the rest of the Heartslabyul group all play it.

He doesn’t have an obvious attachment to any of the cats, but if asked, he’ll be honest. His favorite rare cat is Conductor Whiskers, and his favorite of the regular cats is Willow.

Feeds the cats on a schedule.

Trey: 

He started playing it after hearing Che’nya and Cater mention it individually.

Did not have a favorite until he started collecting the mementos. Apricot bringing him a toothbrush changed his opinion of the game entirely.

Secretly very committed to collecting all the mementos.

Cater: 

Started playing when it got popular and has played off and on since.

While he says Lady Meow-Meow is his favorite, he’s actually very fond of Pickles.

Redecorates his yard when he’s bored, when he’s not feeling well, when he needs a distraction, during study breaks...

Ace: 

Refused to play for the longest time under the assumption that it would be boring, but caved and downloaded it to understand what his friends were talking about.

He doesn’t have a particular reason, but he’s gotten rather attached to Dottie.

The type to play a lot for a few days then forget to open it for a week.

Deuce: 

His mom also plays! They started together and send each other screenshots sometimes.

His favorite is Whiteshadow, who he has never seen. He’s determined to catch them.

There is never a cohesive theme to the goodies he sets out.

Savanaclaw

Leona:

Does not play. Unfortunately, Cheka plays, meaning he’s heard about it and seen it enough to understand when someone talks about it.

Adamant that he does not have a favorite cat, but he does. It’s Billy the Kitten.

Has considered downloading it, but the thought of his family find out stops him every time.

Ruggie: 

Does not remember when or why he initially downloaded it, but checks the yard every few days.

He doesn’t have a specific favorite cat. Of the ones he’s had in his yard, he’s fond of Gozer, Rascal, and Bandit.

Doesn’t try to get the mementos, somehow gets them anyway.

Jack: 

One of his siblings probably brought it to his attention.

His favorite is Bengal Jack! He loves the little pirate outfit and the shared name.

Refuses to put out Thrifty Bits once he has enough fish to buy better food.

Octavinelle

Azul:

Says he does not have the time, but has been playing in secret for a months.

He will never admit it, but his favorite is Sassy Fran.

Jade and Floyd both know that he plays, but they keep his secret for him. It’s all for naught when Kalim accidentally finds out and starts talking to him about it around other students.

Jade: 

Started playing after seeing screenshots online of the goodies you can put out for the cats.

Another without a clear favorite, but if you really pay attention, you’ll notice he has a soft spot for Pepper.

Enjoys the collection aspect more than anything. The mushroom goodies never leave his yard.

Floyd:

Probably downloaded it from an ad a while ago.

He loves Guy Furry. Of the regular cats, he likes Fred, Pumpkin, Bolt, and Breezy. 

Routinely forgets the game is on his phone.

Scarabia

Kalim: 

Absolutely started playing with a few of his siblings. They have a group chat specifically for screenshots.

His favorite is Peaches! The heart in their fur won him over immediately.

He checks the yard more often than anyone on this list.

Jamil: 

Downloaded it because Kalim and his sister both insisted he give it a try.

Snowball is the first cat you see and often the first memento. He was won over long before he realized he had a favorite.

Depletes his gold fish reserves routinely to stock up on the premium food items.

Pomefiore

Vil:

Wanted to see what the hype was about, got hooked.

While he won’t outright say they’re his favorites, he prefers Maple and Pasty.

Has seriously contemplated spending his own money to buy gold fish. He wants his yard to be immaculately decorated but gets impatient waiting for the funds to buy the goodies he needs.

Rook:

Has been playing for a very long time.

Bob the Cat is his favorite without question.

Epel has caught him talking to the cats multiple times.

Epel: 

Started playing after Deuce and Jack showed it to him.

Señor Don Gato was his favorite for a while, but after getting the Feathered Hat memento, it quickly changed to Mack.

Embarrassed to admit how much he enjoys playing.

Ignihyde

Idia: 

Has played daily since the game came out.

TUBBS.

He owns an unreasonable amount of merch and shows no signs of stopping. His room is flooded with stuffed keychains, figurines, pins and buttons, plushies, etc.

Ortho: 

Not as dedicated as his brother, but he started playing a little after it came out.

Loves Macchiato and Melange. Sends his brother screenshots when they’re both visiting.

Has seen Whiteshadow more than anyone else. He just knows.

Diasomnia

Malleus:

Lilia introduced it to him.

Speckles became his favorite after learning their personality is “lonely.” His grew fond of Tabitha after getting the Random Seeds memento. It reminded him of his grandmother.

Has made it a point to collect every memento.

Lilia: 

Unclear how long he’s been playing, but by the number of mementos he has, it’s been a while.

Fond of Ganache. He doesn’t have a particular reason beyond finding them cute.

Bounces between redecorating his yard multiple times a day and leaving it for weeks at time.

Silver: 

Lilia introduced it to him too.

He really likes Frosty and always keeps a goodie out for them.

Likes to check the yard as part of his morning and night routines.

Sebek: 

Lilia told all of them about it.

He had no discernable preference prior to getting the Flower Bookmark memento from Marshmallow.

Has every power level memorized.

Ramshackle

Grim: 

Was not the one to download it on the phone he and the player / Yuu share, but took over keeping watch of the yard pretty quickly.

He likes Shadow the most and will instigate arguments about why they’re the best cat.

Teases Deuce every time Whiteshadow visits the yard.

NRC Staff

Trein: 

Has been playing for longer than anyone realizes, but had to start over after getting a new phone at some point.

While he firmly believes that every cat is worthy of being a favorite, he can’t help the soft spot he has for Gabriel. He likes tuxedo cats. Sue him.

Lucius will swat at some of the goodies that have animations.

Crewel: 

Picked it up recently after the curiosity got to him.

His favorite is Spots. They match.

Exclusively sets out the expensive food.

Crowley: 

Everyone is under the impression he started playing recently to see what the students have been talking about, but he has every goodie and the yard expansion already.

He likes Saint Purrtrick.

Spends exorbitant amounts of money on this game.

Vargas:

Downloaded it a long time ago, played for a bit, then forgot it was on his phone. He realized he still had it after overhearing some of the students talk about it.

Joe DiMeowgio, without question.

Knows the personality of every cat.

Sam:

Has been playing for a moderate amount of time, but not very dedicated. He mostly plays between customers on slow days.

Ms. Fortune is his favorite cat. He leaves the carboard house out for her at all times.

Can guess your favorite cat with terrifying accuracy.

Royal Sword Academy

Che’nya:

Joined the initial hype when the game came out, stopped playing for a while after getting a new phone, then picked it up again when he started at RSA.

His favorites rotate often, but Ginger and Lexy are always near the top of the list.

His favorite yard style is Clear.

Neige:

Has been playing as long as Idia, but he’s missed a few days here and there when too busy to think about checking it.

He adores Sapphire and Jeeves!

His favorite goodies are the beds that look like other animals.

Noble Bell College

Rollo:

Probably downloaded it to keep other students from recommending it to him.

He doesn’t have a favorite cat. He doesn’t even open the game.

...It’s Spooky.

Misc.

Cheka: 

He’s been playing for a few months, but he doesn’t have a phone, so it’s on a tablet.

Sunny!

Swings wildly between liking Tubbs and getting upset whenever he visits.

Najma: 

Has been playing long enough to collect about a fourth of the mementos.

She really likes Patches.

A Tubbs hater—he keeps showing up multiple times a day to eat her expensive food, and she’s trying to collect the rare cat mementos.

NPC Students*

Red Pomefiore Student: 

Downloaded it per recommendation, but doesn’t check it more than a few times a week.

Favorite cat is Misty.

Favorite goodie is the Burger Cushion.

Purple Pomefiore Student: 

Has been playing for more than a year and checks the yard several times a day.

Favorite cat is Quicksilver.

Has the yard set up like a cat café.

*These are my favorites of the nameless students at NRC. The first is part of the Spelldrive / Magift club and is one of the two who keeps Epel from being pulled into the lake during Vargas Camp. The second is in the Film Club and can be seen in Epel’s Dorm SSR vignette. The colors refer to their hair.

[writerleo86]

Armor Champions - Season 4 - The Cale Arc - Episode 187 (Do Not Copy)

   In a small room of an apartment, both Aaron and Billy hurried to the window. They spotted the android called Cale who stood in the air with his arms folded.

   "Master Trey will be pleased to know about these two. But first, I must rid the world of these humans."

Armor Champions - Season 4 - Episode 187:  Reuniting With Old Friends; Desoto's Shaky Feeling

   The boys continued to watch until their enemy finally flew away.

   "What was he?" questioned Billy.

   "By the way it moves," Aaron responded. "That was an android. We should do what we can to avoid it."

   "We can strike back," replied Billy. "We can go back into the past and ask everyone for help."

   "That may work," answered Aaron. "But we must leave immediately."

   Moments later, the pair hurried into the basement of the large home in Osaka. They found the doctor Danielle Brief sitting by a laptop-computer by two small ships.

   Aaron ran into the nearest ship and sat its controllers up while Billy checked on the ship's fuel at the bottom.

   Aaron now wore a zipped blue jacket with long sleeves, black pants, and a golden belt with a silver rectangular buckle. He also had on a pair of short green boots with black at the center.

   Billy wore a black undershirt underneath a long-sleeved blue jacket that was opened. He also had tight black pants with a red belly band and a pair of short black boots.

   "What happened Guys?" asked Danielle.

   "We saw it," Aaron informed her. "It was an android that attacked the company Mom."

   "An android?" cried Danielle. "After all these years?"

   And Aaron told his mother "We're going back to get help from some friends in the past. We are going to put a stop to these attacks."

   He continued to inspect the entire ship as Danielle sat on her chair with a beautiful smile on her face.

   Aaron announced "The ship is fully ready!"

   "It's night time now," reported Danielle.

   "Good!" cried Aaron. "We can use that for cover."

   And Billy walked toward the ship as he ordered "Get on with it then!"

   Aaron shook his head with a smile and he said "Right. Let's be off."

   Both warriors aboard the small ship as Danielle opened the large opening by pressing a button on her computer.

   After the boys sat at the front, Aaron drove the ship out of the building. Then Danielle hurried outside and waved her hands as the ship flew as high as it could into the sky.

   The ship flew above a large and beautiful park where the emotionless android called Cale remained. Sitting on the swing by his right side was his creator named Trey Chaolan.

   Trey wore a long-sleeved black top underneath a short-sleeved black shirt with a fine collar and a long white tie. He also had on black dress-pants and purple socks. And he had on a pair of black slip-on shoes.

   They both watched the ship soar into the bright clouds. And Trey gave a wicked smirk.

   A large void of purple energy quickly formed before it. And the ship flew into the portal.

   A few moments later, the ship flew out of the hole. Both Aaron and Billy soon found themselves in the light-blue sky of Violet City.

   Aaron continued to ride the ship close into the city. And the pair spotted the large old mansion.

   "There it is!" reported Aaron.

   Billy stared at the building and gave a soft smile.

   "I'm home," He thought.

   They found two people sitting at a small white table near the porch of the beautiful backyard.

   The person sitting at the far side was the lovely Relena. She had on black eyeliner and red lipstick. She wore a pink blouse with long sleeves, tight white jeans, and brown slip-on shoes. And she wore her golden ring around her left ring-finger.

   The other was her husband, Jede Kaballa. He wore a red shirt with long black sleeves, tight blue jeans, and white shoes. He also had on a black necklace with a silver ring at the center. And he had his golden ring around his left ring-finger.

   Once they heard the sound, the couple quickly stood up and spotted the small ship flying toward them.

   "By the gods!" cried Jede.

   "Is it?" yelled Relena.

   Hurrying from the front door were the others.

   Desoto Martin wore a black undershirt, tight blue jeans, and white shoes. He also had his black band around the top of his head.

   His cousin Joey Spade had on a black tee-shirt, tight pale-green jeans, and black boots.

   Kody Perez wore a collared orange tee-shirt, brown dress-pants, and brown slip-on shoes.

   Carla Lewis had on a long white skirt that had no sleeves. And she wore a pair of short brown boots.

   Rico Nonaka had on a buttoned white shirt that had a fine collar and the long sleeves pulled to the elbows. He also wore a pair of tight khaki pants and brown shoes. And his dark-brown band was worn around the top of his head.

   Once the ship landed in the front yard full of green grass, the entrance on its back lowered down and the two boys ran down.

   "I knew it!"

   Relena hurried outside along with Jede and she cheered "It's them! They're back!"

   Carla ran to Billy and gave a warm hug as the others gathered around.

   "Billy!" shouted a happy Jede.

   Joey gave a quick hug to Aaron as he cried "You know how to make an entrance."

   A cheerful Aaron shook his head and replied "I try my best."

   "Welcome back, the both of you," said Kody.

   A loving Relena gave a warm hug to Billy as he shook Jede's right hand with his right hand.

   Then Joey asked Aaron "How is he?"

   Aaron shook his head and told him "It's a work in progress."

   "I missed you so much, Little Bro!" Relena told Billy.

   Billy gave a quick laugh and commented "I wasn't gone that long, you know."

   After she released Billy, he shook the right hand of Joey and the two hugged each other.

   "How's my training buddy?" asked Joey.

   "I'm great!" answered Billy.

   Then he looked at Joey once again and cried "You grew your hair out!"

   "And you grew a beard," said Joey. "You've gotten more handsome."

   Carla stood next to him and told Joey "I think he looks great with the beard too."

   After both Jede and Relena hugged Aaron, Billy noticed a skeptical Desoto standing at the door with his arms folded.

   "Hey, Desoto!" Billy greeted.

   Desoto lowered his head and thought to himself.

Desoto's thoughts:

Inside an old cave underneath the ruins of the enemy's hideaway, the three champions in armor -- Billy of the Ice Dome, Carla of the Golden Grail, and Desoto of the Black Shadow -- had confronted a foe from Desoto's past.

After Kyle Troi told his story, Billy gave out a quick chuckle and responded.

"You're an idiot if you think Joey will go back to worthless worms like you."

Desoto soon noticed the color of Billy's eyes had changed from a peaceful blue to a gloomy black.

Then a black wave rose from Billy's body as he yelled "Lay one hand on him, and I will KILL YOU!"

Desoto slowly back away as he asked "Wat's goin' n wit' ya Billy?"

The black aura around Billy's body grew larger as the area began to shake.

And Billy chanted "Polgoleszhunta, Polgoleszhunta, Polgoleszhunta!"

Parts of the earth rose as both Carla and Desoto watched in horror.

First, a large wave of wind blew from Billy to the enemy Troi who held his wrists to his face.

Second, Billy spread his arms out as he looked up. And he slowly stepped forward as large balls of black fire flew from him to his opponent.

"What is this guy?" cried a scared Troi.

A sinister Billy faced the enemy once again with an wicked grin as small sparks of white lightning came from his body along with more balls of fire.

"BILLY!" screamed Carla. "STOP!"

And Desoto yelled "STOP IT BILLY!"

Finally, a large explosion had vaporized the entire cave.

   After that, a caring Billy walked two steps forward as he held his right hand forward.

   "How are you doing, Desoto?" He asked.

   Desoto took two steps back and turned his head away.

   "I'm fine," He told Billy.

   And a questioned Billy lowered his head as a concerned Aaron found Desoto. Carla turned her head to face an uneasy Desoto. And she lowered her head with concern as well.

   Then Jede announced to both Aaron and Billy "This is Rico Nonaka."

   The brothers found the newcomer Rico Nonaka.

   Jede informed them "He works as a detective for the Space Police Department."

   "Space Police?" repeated Billy.

   And Jede added "Rico is also one of us -- an Armored One."

   "Aaron Brief," Rico implied. "The champion that originally came from the future."

   "You two know each other?" asked Relena.

   Aaron stared at the young detective for a moment. And Rico responded.

   "I know who he is. Anubis of the Time Frame told me about this guy. Aaron is quite a warrior, even though he likes to cross through time barriers a lot."

   "Anubis of the Time Frame?" called Aaron.

   "Who's that?" asked Billy.

   "The champion who guards the portals of Time," answered Kody. "Of course he would have a problem with Aaron crossing through Time repeatedly."

   "Wow..." commented Aaron. "I never thought there was a champion that guards all of Time."

   "Whoa!" cried Billy. "So this Anubis guy monitors our trips?"

   Rico shook his head as he laughed.

   And he told Aaron "It's okay. Just be careful for now on. I don't want to be the one that has to take you in, Brief."

   And a smiling Aaron shook his head.

[dameronology]

you have my number {bucky barnes x reader}

summary: bucky barnes' memory is a little selective, thanks to all the brainwashing - but one thing he'll never forget is his love for you, even if you're a complete & utter pain in the ass. his ass. (based on deja vu by olivia rodigro)

^even tho this fic refers to bucky as having a new gf, the reader is still g.n :)

this is spoiler free! enjoyyy

- jazz xx

Your relationship with Bucky Barnes had been nothing short of a train wreck.

And frankly, that was putting it nicely.

It had been a short & passionate affair; intense and sweet and filled with so much emotion in such high concentrations that you'd both almost drowned in it. For every euphoric moment, there had been one so low that you'd scraped your knees on the ground. Climbing a ladder to heaven whilst simultaneously digging your own graves had taken its toll on you both, and eventually, you had no choice but to go your separate ways. It had been for your own sanity, really.

So there he was, tucked away in a neat little box in your brain, labelled don't touch, ever. Even when you were completely wasted, surrounded by your friends and their respective lovers, you never dared to venture back down that particular memory lane. Forgetting all the bad parts and selectively remembering the good parts was easy enough to do, but you had the common sense to remember why you'd broken up in the first place. Because Bucky Barnes, despite being easy on the eyes and having a charming sense of humour, was a pain in your fucking ass. He managed to press every one of your buttons without even trying and his ability to bring out the best in you was completely and entirely wiped out by his tendency to bring out the worst. That wasn't even getting started on his emotional hold-ups; a can of worms neither of you had dared to open until it became the very reason for your demise.

Six months had passed, and you'd managed to expertly avoid him. You worked different missions and Sam Wilson, god bless his sweet soul, went the extra mile to ensure your paths never crossed in a professional sense. On a personal level, however? That was a little more difficult. New York City felt a lot smaller after your break up. You found yourself occasionally ducking under your hood when you saw him on the F-train, or rushing to cross the road when you saw him coming towards you on the street.

That was when you had the whole city to lose yourself in; streets and shops and little food carts to distract yourself with should you need to. Being confined to the same room for a work party was a different story entirely, and one you didn't want to read. Yet, thanks to some insistence from your boss and a little grovelling from your colleagues, you found yourself rocking up to the former Avengers tower on a Friday night.

"So you do exist outside of your work uniform?" Sam Wilson greeted you with a quirked eyebrow.

"Yeah, yeah - nice to see you too, Wilson."

Despite your initial attempts to elbow him in the rips, he wrestled you off of him and pulled you into a tight hug. Sam was one of your favourite colleagues and oldest friends - he'd witnessed the rise and fall of your relationship with Bucky, and been there for you both during the break-up. That had been an exhausting few days, running between your respective apartments in an attempt to offer emotional support to you both.

"D'you want some champagne?" He asked.

"I'm good, but thank-"

You froze, eyes widening at the sight of James Barnes across the room. He looked quintessentially the same, bar for the fact his hair was a little longer and he had a fresh, pink scar under his left eye. Having ditched his usual attire for a black blazer, he looked good. Annoyingly so, in fact. It made you secretly grateful that you'd chosen to dress up a little more than usual too.

"- on second thoughts." You took the flute of champagne from Sam, also grabbing a shot of vodka from the same trey. It was gone in seconds.

"Need I ask?" Sam gave you a playful frown. His brown eyes followed your gaze over his shoulder, landing on the man you'd been staring at. "Ah. I need not."

"Sorry." You murmured. "We haven't actually spoken since, y'know."

"Since you had a break-up that made Ross and Rachel look good?"

"I don't think Bucky has ever seen Friends." You quipped.

"His loss." Sam shrugged. "You should talk to him."

"Nope." You snorted. "Absolutely not. I don't even know if he's moved on."

"Judging by the pretty blonde on his arm, I think he has," Sam replied. "Would you look at that! They're headed right for us."

That was a lot of information to process at once. You would have needed a week alone for your poor, tired brain to deal with the fact that Bucky had someone else on his arm, and a further three days to big yourself up enough to talk to him. Alas, that was not the case tonight. Instead, you had about five seconds between Sam finishing his sentence and your ex-boyfriend reaching you. It was just as well you found the energy within that timeframe to down your champagne.

You could see the woman on his arm clearer now. To give credit where credit was due, she stunning. She looked like the sort of girl who smelt of strawberries and Chanel, and grew her own vegetables on the fire escape. The kind of person you swore to be with every New Year that came, but quickly ditched after a week, returning to drinking coffee from the Starbucks under your apartment rather than going to the organic, vegan place a few blocks over. There was an ethereal glow about her and fuck. You were mad.

"Sam!" Bucky called out to his friend - for a minute, you thought he was ignoring you, before you realised he genuinely didn't recognise you. Your name rolled off his tongue with a tone of uncertainty, as though he was learning a new language and still learning how to pronounce things. "Wow. You look...different."

"So do you." You shot back. "Who's your friend?"

"This is Katie." He awkwardly smiled. "My...my girlfriend."

"It's nice to meet you." You forced an equally pained grin, taking her hand in a shake.

"How do you and Bucky know each other?" She asked.

"Work." Bucky quickly said. You thinned your eyes at him, almost in disbelief.

"So you're an Avenger like these two?" Katie asked, clearly not picking up on the tension. "That's so cool."

"Not in an official capacity." You replied. "But they'd be fucked without me."

--

The night only got longer from there, really.

There wasn't enough champagne in the world to help the void in your soul. It was a gaping wound that Bucky Barnes had both filled and widened - and tonight, he was doing the latter. It sounded as though him and Katie were having a grand ol' time of it. From the parts of the conversation that you'd actually bothered to listen to, you'd gathered that she'd arrived in New York from London just over three months ago. That meant she had a fucking accent. Of course she did. It made everything she said a thousand times more interesting.

"We were in Paris, in this little cafe. What was it called, babe? Maison de vie?"

"Maison de l'amour, doll." Bucky corrected her. It had only sounded right when he was calling you that.

Your eyes shot up from your drink, immediately staring daggers at them both. The slimy bastard. You had been the one to show him that place. You'd been in Paris for a mission, and after realising it was your four-month anniversary, you'd taken him there for pancakes. It had been a slow morning, filled with hazy eyes and pink skies, and it had ended with him dropping the L-bomb for the first time. The photo you'd taken of Bucky, sat beside a pile of pancakes the same size of him and with whipped cream on his chin, had been your phone background until the day you broke up.

"I've been there." You didn't break away from his gaze, holding cold blue eyes in a trance that he found to be almost suffocating.

"Oh, nice!" Katie beamed. "Did you enjoy it?"

"Yeah." You sniffed. "The company was shit, though."

"Oh, man." She replied. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's not your fault." You gave her a sweet smile - to Bucky, it was a look of venom. "So, tell me more about your trip to Paris."

He quickly cleared his throat. "We didn't do much. Just a weekend getaway-"

"- are you forgetting that we saw Billy Joel?" Katie cut him off with a laugh. "The Billy Joel!"

"Right." It looked as though his mouth had gone completely dry.

"He told me he loved me for the first time to Uptown Girl-"

"-excuse me for a moment." You shoved your glass in her hand, before backing away from your little huddle.

Your brain was focused on getting away and only on getting away. The room suddenly felt a thousand times hotter, and a thousand times smaller too, as though the walls were closing in on you. Maybe that wouldn't have been so bad if they'd just collapsed around you and swallowed you fucking whole. Anything to get away from this situation.

Making a beeline for the balcony doors, you elbowed them open and stepped outside. The cold air of the rooftop gardens was a welcome contrast to the stuffy indoors, biting, night air hitting your face like an icy hug. The sounds of the city rung below you - sirens and yells and tourists - and tangled into the faint sound of the music, all parts of a world that your brain was working overtime to block out.

You focused on the city instead, using the bright lights of the surrounding buildings to anchor you to reality. None of it really even made sense - you were over Bucky. Had been for a long time. It was just the thought of him doing all the things that he'd done with you, with someone else. It made you feel a little bad for Katie, too.

"I was going to tell you about Billy Joel."

You glanced over your shoulder, giving a derivative snort. "Piss off, Bucky."

"I'm serious." He ignored your demand, cautiously approaching you.

"I brought you those tickets!" You turned around to face him. "We were meant to go together. Billy Joel was our thing."

"We broke up!' He reminded you. "Like I said, I was going to tell you that we went together-"

"- I don't care." You cut him off. "I genuinely don't care."

"That was a lot of storming off for someone who doesn't care."

"Okay, maybe I care a little bit." You huffed, taking a seat on a bench. "It's not even that you're with someone else, it's that you're doing all the things we did. The nicknames, the pancake place, the concert."

"I..." Bucky took a seat beside you, pondering for a moment.

"And declaring your love for someone to Uptown Girl is fucking weird." You muttered.

"Do you have a better suggestion?"

"Vienna, obviously."

"You're such a pain in the ass." Bucky replied. "But for what it's worth, I wasn't thinking of Katie in that moment."

You glanced up at him, frowning. "What do you mean?"

"D'you remember that morning when we were in New Orleans?" He asked. "And we had a few hours to kill before our flight, so you started dancing around the hotel room to Uptown Girl?"

"I remember." You softly smiled.

"That was when I realised I loved you." He admitted. "I was replaying that in my head at the concert, and it just kinda came out, and Katie heard."

"Damn." You muttered. "Sucks to be her, huh?"

"I like Katie." He said. "Truth be told, doll, I'm still stuck in the past a little bit. With you, and with what we had."

"We fucking hated each other by the end, Buck."

"I know, but I mean all the stuff before that." He explained. "You were the first person who saw me for who I am and not what I've done. The first person that actually made me feel loved and worthy."

"I do try."

He lightly elbowed you "I'm serious. I think I'm just projecting my longing for what we had onto my current relationship."

"You're being painfully honest tonight." You observed. "It's fucking weird."

"Who taught me to be painfully honest?"

"Right." You rolled your eyes. "So this is how Frankenstein felt when he created his monster."

"You're the worst," Bucky muttered. "I genuinely am sorry, though. I shouldn't be recycling our memories. I should make new ones.'

Dusting off your trousers, you stood up. "You're right."

"Thank you, though."

"For what?"

"For finding me first," He replied, "and for teaching me what love is."

"Well, if you ever need to be reminded? You have my number."

[thorne93]

History Repeats (Part 14)

Prompt: Life’s hard, right? Well throw in a not so great job, a broken heart, and chasing a pipe dream in LA. But could someone come along to make all the bad shit disappear? Or is he just another heartbreak waiting around the bend?

Warnings: language, drug addiction, alcohol addiction, angst/heartbreak, adult themes (??)

Word Count: 2525

Note: Aesthetic made by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo because she’s absolutely amazing Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo . Brainstorming from @carryonmyswansong​

**Song Inspiration: I Almost Do by Taylor Swift; 3AM by Halsey; When The Party’s Over by Billie Eilish

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up, you felt like shit, and not because of the drugs and alcohol that only recently vacated your system. You groaned, squeezing your eyes shut. Did you really kick Hayden out? Were you honestly that far gone? 

Yeah, he broke your heart. He wasn’t the first asshole to do it, but he did stick around. Maybe that was because he had to though.

No, you knew better. He had enough money to stay at a hotel, but he stayed with you. He cared about you. It just hurt so bad to not have him any more. You hadn’t said you loved him, not yet, but you did, you loved him with everything you had and he just… broke everything. 

 Maybe you should go apologize.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you slipped on a comfortable shirt and yoga pants before you trodded out to the guest room, Hayden’s room. You knocked on the door before poking your head in. 

Only, there was nothing there. All of his things gone. His suitcases absent. No note, no letter, not even a post-it note. 

A choked sob escaped you. You knew you kicked him out, but you gave him until the next night. He was already gone?

So much for staying. So much for caring. 

No text, no call, no letter. It seemed as if he truly did want to be gone from you. 

Fine. If that’s the way he wanted it… Wish granted. 

------------------------

Months went by and you tried to forget him, tried to turn your pain into art.

Trey worked hard to get your EP ready. You had several tracks that you wanted to feature and he did enjoy your lyrics and tune. He was happy to work with you and the other members of your band to get the sound you wanted. 

By the time the singles were released, you were already becoming a hit. You hit all of the media platforms and your work exploded, sending you soaring to the charts. You weren’t quite topping them yet, but you were definitely being demanded on the radio and your Youtube and Spotify numbers were great, rising all the time. 

As time went on though, your addiction only grew. With Hayden out of your life, the glaring reminders that you lost all your old friends, and none of your old boyfriends seemed to ever love you, there was nothing to stop you from becoming nearly dependent on the drugs and alcohol. 

You’d never been like this in your life, but you’d never been at such an odd time in your life either. On every romantic and personal front, your life was a total flop, a zero sum. But your career, your dream job was finally taking off. The world was your oyster, you were rubbing shoulders with musical big wigs, meeting huge names and musicisinas. 

Between the complete amazement you were in from being discovered and having your heart broken for the last time, you were a mental mess. 

Hayden wasn’t just another guy. Jason was just another guy, just like every ex before him. 

But Hayden, he was different. When you and Jason split up, it wasn’t the man you mourned, but the death of yet another relationship. With Hayden, you missed him, not being together. You missed the light he brought to your life. You missed the way he supported you. You missed the way you two could joke about movies together. You missed how you could act completely goofy and silly and he joined in. 

You loved him, you were in love with him, and he pulled the rug out from under you.

That was why your habit of using coke was slowly getting worse. You managed to keep your job, for a while, keep the desires away. Then you started to get where you were barely sober for that too and just when your boss mentioned it, you decided it was time to leave anyway. You put in your two weeks and left gracefully.

As soon as you were no longer tied to the hotel, Trey put you in every lounge, venue, and club he could find. You were singing all of your songs on your EP. Every night you did a show, you got off the stage, got drunk or high, or both, and then you crashed. 

Same routine, every night. 

Anything to numb the pain of losing Hayden, of feeling like your life was in shambles. It wasn’t just losing Hayden, it was realizing you had no close friends, no one else to lean on. He’d become your best friend, your confidant, your lover. He was everything you ever wanted or needed, and he was gone. 

Neither of you had sent any messages to each other. It killed you, but you had to move forward, if that’s what you could call drowning your sorrows in a bottle or a baggie. 

Tonight, you just got done singing a set and you were hanging out with Darren, Veronica, Brad, and Tai. Unbeknownst to you, Hayden was actually about to make a stop by this bar. He had some contacts in your circle, a few people he knew in the music world that he asked to keep an eye on you, and if you got too out of control or needed help, they should let him know. He also watched your Instagram and Twitter, keeping an eye on your partying that way.

He’d gotten a few texts before about you, just an update on how you were, but tonight was a red alert from a guy that was somewhat in your circle. He watched you as you did a bump of coke, drink whatever was passed to you, and you were all over everyone in the bar. It was a sloppy mix of drunk-high. You held onto everyone, laughing, trying to crawl on the bar, making a complete ass of yourself. 

Typically your antics were cheered on because everyone in your scene was pretty wild, but even tonight some of them were worried about how you were acting. 

Hayden made his way downtown as soon as he got the text, looking for the bar. Finally, as he walked by, he saw you through the window. You were laughing, throwing your head back, hanging on other people, and trying to dance. 

You were a mess, and that was obvious. 

He pressed his lips into a thin line before going into the bar. He made his way over to you. He wanted to say he felt relief when he saw you, but he didn’t. He just felt worse. He wasn’t an idiot about your drug abuse, he also wasn’t stupid to see what had triggered it. He just thought it was stupid for you to get mixed up in this shit over him. He wasn’t worth it. 

He could see how it was affecting you. Dark circles painted your eyes, your clothes hung loosely on your body, you looked as if you were awake solely from the drugs. He hated how bad you looked.

“Hey,” he greeted loudly over the bar music and patrons. 

You looked over and saw him, your eyes going in and out of focus. “Oh my god, it’s you! Hey! Stay! Have a drink!” you encouraged as you fell all over him, putting your arms around him. In your current state, none of the pain that would’ve normally come from seeing him happened. 

“Hey, no, I’m good. This isn’t really my scene. Y/N, you seem really far gone, do you want me to take you home?” 

You pushed away from him, frowning. “What? No, why would I want that?” You reached in your purse and grabbed something, about to put it in your mouth. “I’m having a good time here, Hayden. You should try it,’ you urged giddily.

“Are you fucking crazy?” he demanded as he slapped the little white thing out of your hand. “Was that fucking E? On top of what you already have in your system?”

“The fuck is your problem?” you ordered, angry.

“My problem is you destroying your life and your body,” he informed.  “I’m taking you home,” he stated firmly. He started to turn you around and push you outside. Everyone started to look your way. 

“No, you aren’t!” you protested loudly, moving wildly, but he just persisted. He went around in front of you, grabbed your wrist, and tugged you outside and started walking you down the sidewalk until you got yourself free of his hold. “Jesus! What the fuck is your deal? Those are my friends. I’m having a good time!” 

“A good time?” he demanded, his voice reigned in anger. “You think this is a good time? You’re out of your fucking mind.” 

“Hey, Mr. Entertainment Business newsflash,a  party-girl image is great publicity. Trey encourages this so long as I’m fine to record.”

“Oh, I’m so glad to hear that your producer endorses you getting high and drunk, as long as you’re off the clock.” 

“You aren’t my handler, you’re not my parents, yo’re not my baby sitter, so just fuck off.”

He stared at you, clenching his jaw. “If you want to stay here and become like---If you want to stay here and party, that’s fine, but I’m done. I’m done with this. I’m done watching you ruin your life and throw so much potential away. I’m not gonna stick around to watch you drive your self into rock bottom when I’ve tried like hell to get you to wake the fuck up.”

“You didn’t stick around! Newsflash, asshole! You left! You left me high and dry.” 

“You kicked me out!” he reminded. “After I tried to approach you about your addiction. And I did stick around, you just didn’t know it.” 

“You didn’t approach me about it, you attacked me about it. Besides, what the hell do you mean you’re not going to stick around or watch me? You haven’t been around.” 

Letting out a sigh, he ran his hand down his face. “When I left, I may have asked some friends to keep an eye on you. I told them to update me if you were getting worse or better.”

“You were spying on me?” you asked, gasping.

“No, I just had people keeping an eye on you. If they were at the same party or something, they’d just let me know how you were doing.”

“Oh, nice to know you cared so much,” you retorted, rolling your eyes. You were getting more and more sober with the fresh air and the anger.  

“I do care. I think I’m the only one you know who does’ fucking care about you. I’m the only one not letting you just become an addict. I’m fighting for you.”

“Oh, is that what you were doing when you broke up with me? Fighting for me?”

He glared at you. He didn’t want to have this conversation. “Yes, I was. I was trying to make sure we were making the right choice.”

“Oh, spare me the bullshit!” you shouted, your head falling back. “I’m sick of this. I’m sick of the lies. Just be honest with me. You didn’t care about me, you didn’t love me, you wanted a rebound. You weren’t worried about the both of us. You’re just like everyone else. You wanted something to distract you from your ex leaving you and I was the perfect replacement. Then when you got bored, you cast me aside.” 

“You weren’t a replacement! You weren’t my rebound,” he yelled. 

“Then what was it?!” you screamed. “Because from where I stood, you and I were perfect, more than perfect. We could spend time with each other, lean on each other, support each other, we lived together, I met your child, we had date nights all the time and all of that just -- you ended it. Without warning. We didn’t even talk about it. You didn’t even ask me how I was feeling, if I cared about you. You just decided for the both of us that it would be better if this wasn’t a rebound. But it wasn’t ever about that. It was about me taking putting someone else before me like I always do, and I’m the one who got fucking hurt, not you.”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry that you got hurt. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It hurt me too. And it hurts like hell to watch you do this to yourself. You think I liked watching you come home high and drunk all the time?” 

“I don’t imagine it bothered you too much. We weren’t dating any more.” 

He shrugged. “So? Just because I’m not dating you, it doesn’t mean I don’t give a shit about you.”

“See, in my world, it does. You don’t break someone’s fucking heart then try to tell them you still care. You’re the one who decided to date me. I asked, you shot me down. Then, when I was really happy, when I thought this was real, that we had a shot, that this was something that would last and you just ripped it away. No conversation.” 

He shook his head. “Yeah, and I’m sorry for that. I am. I should’ve talked to you, but is this really what you want? You want to be so numb and fucked up on drugs you can’t function?”

“I can function just fine, thanks for checking in!”

“I can’t believe you’re fine with this. You’ve been so strong since I met you. Going after your dream, working hard at your job, you never would’ve given into this bullshit, despite what happened between us.” 

“Yeah, well shit changes. Clearly you know that.”

“Nothing changed. I cared for you then, and I do now.” 

You scoffed. “Spare me, alright? It was clear to me after you left you never gave a shit. I licked your wounds so you could heal and then you left me. Fuck off. You don’t get the right to tell me where I can hang out, what I can do, or when I can do it.” You got in his face, your voice low before you turned around to head back inside. 

He stood there more upset than he had been when you two first broke up. He wasn’t sure what he thought he would gain from coming out tonight. He just thought he could save you from yourself. He knew he was the reason you went on the downward spiral but he didn’t know how to fix it. 

He bit his lip to keep from crying as he watched you rejoin your friends and pick up a shot glass and knock it back. He shook his head as he turned to walk down the street.

He couldn’t keep doing this to himself, or to you. He needed to move on. He couldn’t watch you suffer any more. He had tried to help you. Every time he did though, you turned him down - hard. 

With his heart heavy, he took a taxi back to his new hotel and tried to forget all about you.

If only it were that easy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Forever Tag:

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Hayden Christensen:

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History Repeats:

@multifandomblog315​​

[breanime]

Congrats on 2000 babe! Can I request Neighbors Know My Name with Billy Russo? 💜

Warning: steamy

*gif not mine*

You were relatively quiet when Billy first started, sighing against his shoulder and gasping into his neck, but as he started going harder, going deeper, you started to get louder.

He grinned, hovering over you, connected to you by the hips. “The neighbors are gonna hear,” he said. It wasn’t at all a command for you to be quiet—he liked when you got loud. He was just stating a fact that he was perfectly fine with.

And just on time, just as he was pushing against you again, burying himself inside of you, there was a knock knock knock on the wall.

“See?” He laughed.

You clamped a hand over your mouth, but your muffled screams were still very audible. Not to mention the slamming of the headboard—Billy was hoping wondering if you’d break this headboard. If you did, this would be headboard #6 that he’d have to proudly throw away. You’d only had this one for a good three weeks… His head fell back as your legs started shaking, sticking up straight in the air as you scratched at his back.

Fuck, Billy loved fucking you.

He looked down at your lovely face, pride filling him, as you screamed his name. He took your hand and dragged it down from your face; he wanted to hear you.

“Billy!” You gasped out. “Billy, Billy, Billy!”

He came at the same time you did, calling your name in return. He knew the neighbors were listening—Billy could picture them, stressed and probably turned on as he kissed you, whispering how good you were as you both came down.

He couldn’t make himself feel bad about it, though.

“Take this pillow right here,” he said, already ready for more, “I know you’re so excited, but if you bite it, maybe they won’t hear…” He leaned down as he positioned himself behind you, his mouth on your ear. “…not that I give a fuck. They can call and knock and be upset…” He pushed into you, and you gasped into the pillow, burying your face in it as he fucked you again, still sensitive from your orgasm. “…but I bet they know my name, and I bet they know who the fuck you belong to.”

You nodded, tears of desire filling your eyes as you cried out into the pillow.

“Say it,” Billy ordered, grabbing a handful of your hair and pulling your head back, his grin widening as you started screaming in pleasure again. “Say who you belong to. Say my name.”

“Billy!” You screamed. “I belong to you, Billy!”

“Tell me you love me.”

“I love you, Billy!”

“I love you, too,” he grunted, letting go of your hair and letting your head fall back down into the pillow. He grabbed your hips now, slamming into you so hard, the bed was starting to creak. It’d been a while since you’d broken the whole bed, but Billy was willing to take that chance.

There had been times when you two were sexing that he knew the neighbors could hear—like now. While he was banging on your body, loving you and making sure you knew how much you meant to him, they were banging on the wall. Sometimes he’d get a call in the middle of the night when he was buried inside of you as you rode him; a neighbor complaining about the noise, having been woken from their sleep by your aroused screams. And, to be fair, you tried—more than Billy, to be honest—to be accommodating and quiet down, but Billy did not make it easy for you.

If anything, he challenged himself to see just how loud he could get you to be.

“Fuck,” you gasped into the pillow, “Oh shit, Billy…”

He laughed. He loved how much you loved when he was rough with you. You were the kind of woman who took him for what he was, and Billy fell for you faster than he thought possible because of that. He’d always been a receptive lover, doing what he could to make the person he was with feel good, but he was dedicated to making you orgasm. He wanted each and every time you were together to be incredible, wanted to hear you scream his name and tell him how good he was making you feel, he wanted to be the one and only person to reduce you to a symphony of sweet cries and gasps and sighs.

He wanted to consume you, and he wanted everyone within range to know that you were Billy Russo’s and no one else’s.

And by the way you were screaming—

—they knew.

*******************************************************************************************

This was not the first time I’ve used a Trey Songz song to fantasize about Ben Barnes in some capacity...and it won’t be the last. Thanks for reading!

[roguesandsaviors]

First Meetings

Fandom: Grudge Match

Characters: BJ Rose, Billy “The Kid” McDonnen, Trey Rose, Shea Grant (OFC)

Pairing: BJ Rose x Shea Grant (OFC)

Summary: BJ takes on training Kid for his upcoming match with Razor. He finds himself a little distracted by someone else in the gym though.

Word Count: 2,188

Rating: SFW

Warning: None

A/N: I decided to give BJ Sally’s last name since he wouldn’t go by McDonnen. I adored this character in the movie and it doesn’t seem like there is too much love out there for him. Mistakes are all my own as it is un-beta’ed. Hope everyone enjoys. 

****************************************************************************************

He first saw her on the second day in the gym. He was half paying attention to the pull up that Kid was attempting to make, knowing that he really was going to have his work cut out for him. The movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention. Normally, he would be able to brush it off. It was a gym, there were people moving all around him. There was a fluidity to the movement though, a sort of grace that only someone who was naturally talented at the sport. He had watched enough video and had heard it about himself before his father had signed him up for football. 

“Enough of that Kid. Go jump some rope.” He directed the older man, attention back on him to make it seem like he wasn’t distracted. Once the man was settled into a rhythm, BJ shifted and looked towards the ring. 

Whoever the woman was, she didn’t have that sorry excuse of a trainer outside the ring directing her. No, Frankie had someone who knew what they were doing working with her. Though there wasn’t much instruction being given. She was good, really good. It would be awkward to ask about her, making him look like a creep if he did, and he couldn’t spend that much time just watching when he was getting Kid ready for his fight. His eyes were pulled away from her when he heard Trey ask something to Kid. if he didn’t monitor the conversation, he could be in a world of trouble. Kid didn’t know how to interact with children and that was obvious from the first moment. 

********

The next time that he saw her, she wasn’t done up in practice gear and for the first time since he had met Trey’s mother, his breath was taken away. She was laughing and joking with one of the other guys, a smile on her face that was genuine and sincere. It was the sort of smile that lit up a room and he couldn’t bring himself to look away this time. He was going to end up caught staring but it didn’t matter at that moment. He didn’t know her name or even if she was with someone else. Surely a woman like that had to have a boyfriend or even husband. There were a lot of assumptions being made but his mind was in a rush of a million different sorts of thoughts. 

He was saved from embarrassment though when he felt a tug on his sleeve. He had been ready to abandon Kid and go right over to her. As if he had anything to say to her. The object was to not look like a creep and he had nearly failed that. Trey was standing at his side and asking about the bathroom, providing him the perfect escape from the wandering thoughts that had taken over his mind. 

“Yeah, of course. Come on.” He had to walk past the woman and the few guys that she was talking to, doing everything that he could not to stare. Thankfully, Trey had decided to talk, giving him a bit of a distraction, being forced to focus on the eight year old. He was asking about the hand wraps that he was seeing some of the other fighters in the gym working on. BJ chuckled and began explaining it to his son, appreciating the curiosity that had not left him yet. His son was the most important person in the world to him and even small little moments like these were cherished. 

**********

It was the third time that he found himself looking at her did she notice him. He had Kid working combinations on the pads on his hand, pushing the older man to the point of puking his guts out. It wasn’t the first time and he knew that it would set off a chain reaction in the gym so he had at least set up a few buckets. Frankie had been pissed about having to clean that the first time around. Apparently it was a rule in the gym that the guy that had done it had to clean all of it. Kid had skipped out, leaving BJ to do the cleaning. He wasn’t doing that again, having learned his lesson. 

“Faster with the jab Kid.” He grunted out. “Come on.” Kid still had his form but he needed to pick up more speed. He wouldn’t be able to keep Razor at bay if he didn’t move that leading hand faster. It was when the timer went off and Kid took a second to grab some water did BJ realize his eyes had wandered and she had caught him. He gave her a small smile, hoping not to seem like a complete ass before turning his attention back to Kid. 

“We aren’t done yet. Got another two rounds to go.” Kid had been ready to pull off the gloves. The fight was being taken seriously, BJ couldn’t doubt that but he wondered if Kid realized the sort of preparation and training that he needed. One too many Scotches and meals over at Knock Out had really done their number on his body over the years. Kid grumbled but got back up. BJ was thankful that they weren’t really done because otherwise he might have had to do something about the fact that the woman caught him looking. Not that he didn’t want to do something about it, ask her on a date or something, but he still didn’t even know her name. Or how to begin to approach her. It had been easier to approach Kid and tell him that he was the son that he had never bothered to learn about than it felt like it was going to be to approach the woman. 

BJ was pulling off the mitts at the end of the session when he realized Trey was talking to someone. He swallowed hard when he realized it was the woman that he had been watching for the past two weeks. The two were in a fairly animated conversation, with her having taken a seat on the bench besides his son. Trey was all smiles and clearly enjoying whatever it was that they were talking about. For a second his nerves were forgotten about and he enjoyed the look of happiness on his son’s face. Then he remembered that he was going to have to make his way over. 

Setting the pads back, it gave him a second to compose himself before he walked over to them. 

“Hey buddy. You ready to go?” He asked before looking towards her. Licking his lips, he shoved the foolish nerves to the back of his mind the best that he could. “I’m sorry, he wasn’t bothering you was he?” Trey gave him a deadpan look like it was the worst possible question that he could have asked. Sometimes the kid was too smart for his own good. Something that BJ would never discourage but in moments like these it was not convenient. 

“No, not at all. We were having a great conversation about the lovely art project he is working on.” Some relief washed over him and he gave her a more relaxed smile. 

“Showing off again are you?” He teased Trey, who was in the process of packing up his bag. 

“I needed an opinion dad and you were working with Kid.” It was a matter of fact answer and caused both adults to laugh. BJ couldn’t argue with that. Of all the people though, he had to choose her. BJ reached out and ruffled the boy’s hair as he came to stand beside him.

“Thank you,” he offered to the woman before extending his hand to her. “BJ Rose.” His breath was once more caught in his throat when her smaller hand fit against his for a shake. 

“Shea Grant, nice to meet you.” Her eyes flickered over to Kid, who was making his way over to them. “I’ll let you guys get out of here. Let me know how your teacher likes that wonderful picture Trey.” It wasn’t patronizing or belittling. She was being kind to his son and that had him more sold than anything else. Trey beamed. 

“I will.” He watched her head off to talk to someone else, eyes flickering to Kid again. Something was there and he would have to get to the bottom of it. For now, he really did have to get Trey out of there. It was time for a meal and he needed to finish his homework. 

******

The fight was creeping closer and BJ had to devote a little more time to Kid while maintaining a balance of his work and his son. The kids at the college still needed him and his son was always first priority. He hadn’t been able to get to talk to Shea too much more than an occasional passing greeting or a brief conversation about Trey. 

When he entered the gym that morning, he didn’t expect to see Kid there already. Or the way that he was leaning in a little too close to Shea. BJ didn’t like the sight at all and it was clear that Shea was feeling more than a little uncomfortable. Gritting his teeth, he was alone today and didn’t have to worry about Trey seeing anything. Or asking questions that might be difficult to answer.

Making his way over, he quickly caught the older man’s attention. 

“Hey Kid. I don’t see you wrapped up yet. Why don’t you go and do that?” Unconsciously, he had shifted a little closer to Shea. She could handle herself, that much was clear by watching her in the ring. That didn’t mean that he couldn’t step in and offer some assistance. Kid looked a little confused for a moment, smiling before giving Shea a wink and heading off. Anger built up and he wanted to haul off on the other but knew that he couldn’t. He forced himself to turn and face Shea. She had a look of relief on her face. At least that was some vindication that he had done the right thing. There had been a second that he was worried she would lay into him for stepping in when he didn’t need to. “I’m sorry.” The apology came blurting out before he could stop it. 

Shea looked up at him, confused. BJ realized he was going to need to explain himself. 

“You can tell him off if he is making you uncomfortable. You don’t have to put up with any of that just because of who he is…” He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling more self conscious by the second. “I mean, if that is why you weren’t. And if you were going to, I’m sorry that I interrupted that chance.” The man may have been his father but that sort of behavior wasn’t going to fly. Especially not around someone like Shea. He didn’t need Kid ruining anything before it even started. There was another few seconds of silence before she finally responded.

“It’s okay. Thank you.” She shook her head and hefted her bag up on her shoulder a little higher. She was still uncomfortable but less so in the presence of BJ. “Not really sure he knows how to take a hint anyway and I didn’t want to cause a scene.” There was some shyness there that hadn’t been present in their previous interactions and certainly not in the way that she normally held herself in the gym. 

“He can take the knock to his ego. Trust me.” He glanced towards Kid for a second before returning his gaze back to Shea. Now was probably not the best time to make the offer but he felt compelled to. Kid would give him a hard time but if he ended up with a date out of it, it would all be worth it. A date. He hadn’t been on one since before Trey was born. He didn’t let that get to him as he opened his mouth.

“Listen, uh. Trey is at his grandmother’s tonight. I thought maybe you might be free for some dinner?” BJ could have cringed at how he sounded. He wasn’t in high school anymore. Something about the woman had him as nervous as a teenager all over again. Shea seemed surprised by the offer before a more genuine smile came to her face. 

“Dinner would be nice.” She reached into her bag and handed him her cellphone. “Uh, put your number in there and you can give me all the details later. I gotta get to work, sorry.” BJ waved it off, more relieved than anything that she had said yes. He quickly punched his number into the phone and handed back to her. 

“What time do you get off?”

“Shouldn’t be later than five. But I can let you know if that is going to change.” 

“Sounds perfect. I’ll see you later tonight Shea.” He was graced with another smile. 

“I’ll see you then BJ.”

[letyourcolors]

the oc & stranger things? :)

the oc:

my favorite female character: marissa cooper

my favorite male character: hmm i think ryan atwood

my favorite book/season/etc: i honestly love all of them but, while other seasons have some boring or annoying phases, season 2 is the oc reaching PERFECTION it was really the highlight of the show

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): i haven’t rewatched the show in a long time so i don’t really remember all the episodes specifically. 1x07 was definitely the turning point from ‘okay it’s nice’ to ‘WOWWW i love this show!!!!’. i love 2x14 and 2x15 they are soooo pure jfklsfçdg 3x25 is very very sweet too! and i LOVE the finale!!! it’s such a beautiful way to end their story and i’ll literally cry my eyes out every time i watch it

my favorite cast member: hmm i don’t really know them?? i love olivia wilde who isn’t a regular cast member but i guess it counts

my favorite ship: it’s definitely the core four. i don’t care that much about the romantic dynamics and tbh my favorite couple is probably ryan & taylor which is very unpopular lol

a character I’d die defending: marissa cooper! i’d defend all of them but marissa is the only one who actually needs it because everyone hates her when she has done almost NOTHING WRONG!!!! my baby deserved way better

a character I just can’t sympathize with: well obviously i hate volchock, oliver and trey (marissa honey.... such bad luck). one that i really didn’t like for no reason in specific was summer’s dad?? idk why

a character I grew to love: julie cooper and taylor townsend!!!! when i first knew them i hated them but at the end they were my faves i love them so much

my anti otp: the only time i really hated a ship on this show was when sandy cheated on kirsten with that annoying lady named rebecca i guess? don’t really remember but i hated them very much

stranger things:

my favorite female character: ERICA i’m not kidding i thought she was the best part of season 3 (but i love the other girls too)

my favorite male character: i like the boys! i think my favorite one is lucas because the others are constantly praised by the fandom and for me lucas is an incredibly well constructed character

my favorite book/season/etc: i’m gonna say s3 because it was the most connected to the show i had ever felt and it made me laugh so hard and robin & erica were introduced and ugh FLAWLESS. but they’re all pretty great

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): i don’t know if any episode in particular stands out for me but i love the one where eleven saves mike from the bullies and dustin screams ‘SHE’S OUR FRIEND AND SHE’S CRAZY!’ just bc that moment was so pure!!!! and i also love the one with erica saying ‘you know what i love about america? capitalism’ just to get ice cream for life hfkjslhgs

my favorite cast member: i don’t really follow any of the members :(

my favorite ship: it’s definitely the whole squad (and scoop’s trupe specifically) but romantically i guess it’s jonathan x nancy. i think they’re so cute

a character I’d die defending: hmm i guess robin. i mean she doesn’t need me to defend her from the fandom but if they were all real life people i guess i’d always stand up for her cause she’s perfect

a character I just can’t sympathize with: billy??? and btw what is up with y’all romanticizing him he was a PIECE OF SHIT

a character I grew to love: jonathan byers. i thought he was very creepy the first time i watched the show and didn’t like him at all but i’ve rewatched it this year and omg he’s just so soft how could i ever dislike such a pure heart

my anti otp: i don’t really have one. i mean i don’t ship nancy x steve but i did enjoy them while they were together on s1 so it’s not a notp

thank you for sending me!!!! i had a lot of fun answering fjklsdjgs~ljfkla

[usgunn]

September 1, 2019

CLICK HERE for the September 1, 2019 playlist

1.    Furniture - “Transatlantic Cable” (1983)

I stumbled across this band for the first time this week.  Led by Jim Irvin, who went on to be a British music journalist and also has a co-write credit on a Lana Del Rey song?  Only one EP is on Spotify, but I was so smitten with it I had to lead off with something from it this week.  I’m getting a David Sylvian-vibe.

2.    The Late Bronze Age - “King Greed” (1980)

Spotify credits this song to Col. Bruce Hampton and the Late Bronze Age, but when this record, Outside Looking Out, first came out, they were just the Late Bronze Age.  No offense to my hippie pals out there, but due to his frequent visits to the Georgia Theater back when it was a jam-band haunt I always assumed I would never want to have anything to do with Col. Bruce.  But nobody told me he was in a jazzy new wave band in the early 80′s that sounded like what I always wished Pere Ubu sounded like.

3.    Tesco Bombers - “Break The Ice at Parties” (1982)

London band with but one release, the 7″ from which this song comes, on Y Records, which also put out killer music from Maximum Joy and Shriekback.  I only know this from a compilation,  Cease & Desist: DIY!, put together by JD Twitch of Optimo, the legendary Glaswegian DJ team.

4.    Social Climbers - “Palm Springs” (1981)

NYC-band (by way of Bloomington, IN) who made one self-titled record and disappeared as far as I know, later reissued through the combined power of Drag City and Yoga Records.  Now you know as much as I do.  A lot of the album is more vocal-driven, but this track felt right to kick off a run of instrumental tracks coming up.

5.    Fernando Falcão - “Ladeira dos Inocentes” (1981)

Back to Optimo - they also run a label, Optimo Music, which has picked up a sub-label, Selva Discos, that is putting out some fantastic and forgotten Brazilian music--and that label has just reissued two private-press Fernando Falcão albums.  I first heard Fernando Falcão on the great Outro Tempo compilation a couple of years ago of avant-garde Brazilian music from the 80′s (the Os Mulheres Negras track from a few weeks back came from that compilation).  I don’t know what you call this music.  I like it when you don’t know what to call it.

6.    Ennio Morricone - “Seguita” (1971)

I’m not gonna pretend to know much about Morricone beyond what everyone knows (Italian film composer, did several Sergio Leone movies).  But I always love hearing his music, and I’ve always really liked the Crime and Dissonance compilation (from which this song is taken) of some of his lesser-known work put together by Alan Bishop of Sun City Girls and released on Mike Patton of Faith No More’s Ipecac Records.  This menacing jazz tune is from the movie Gli Occhi Freddi Della Paura, if knowing that sort of thing is important to you.

7.    Sons of Kemet - “My Queen is Harriet Tubman” (2018)

One of several projects of Shabaka Hutchings, a British saxophonist and restless collaborator.  Seems to exist somewhere between jazz and afrobeat, with two drummers pounding out frenetic rhythms.  The album this comes from, Your Queen is a Reptile, was The Wire magazine’s #1 album of 2018.

8.    75 Dollar Bill - “Tetuzi Akiyama” (2019)

75 Dollar Bill started as a guitar and drums duo but have expanded to something much different, playing music that seems steeped in the traditions of some mythical country.  This song is like the blues on acid.

9.    5ive Style - “Pledge Drive” (1999)

5ive Style was a Chicago supergroup (if a supergroup can consist of people no-one has ever heard of): John Herndon (Tortoise, Poster Children) on drums, Leroy Bach (Chicago man-about-town, later in Wilco) on bass, Jeremy Jacobson (one-man-band The Lonesome Organist) on keys, and the inestimable Billy Dolan (later of Heroic Doses) on guitar.  Dolan is one of THE great unsung guitar players of the last, I don’t know, 40 years, and you get a taste of that here.

10.   Orange Juice - “Two Hearts Together (10″ Version)” (1982)

Whether you like this song will determine whether we can be friends.  Not really, but I will die on the Orange Juice hill.  Orange Juice was a Glasgow indie-pop band that most people only care about for their early singles and first-draft of their first album, when they were a scrappy, lo-fi band on Glasgow indie-lable Postcard Records.  But I prefer Orange Juice after they signed to Polydor and became an over-produced also-ran.  This Caribbean-inflected non-album single came between their first and second albums on Polydor, when the band had shed its original guitarist and drummer and added Malcolm Ross on guitar (from Edinburgh’s Josef K) and Zeke Manyika on drums, a Zimbabwe-born multi-talented musician who later recorded with The The and The Style Council, and who in my opinion was a catalyst for the best phase of Orange Juice’s career (but who otherwise seems to be a footnote in most people’s Orange Juice histories--to the extent other people have Orange Juice histories). 

11.    Archer Prewitt - “Gifts of Love” (2002)

Archer Prewitt is best known as the lead guitar player for The Sea and Cake, but made several solo albums of his own in the late 90′s/early 2000′s.  No one would ever accuse The Sea and Cake’s bossa-nova inflected, jazzy post-rock of being “hard,” but Archer’s albums really veered into 70′s soft rock territory, in the best way possible.  There’s a lot to like about this song, but the string-laden outro may be the best part, so good that I’m always disappointed when it fades out so soon.

12.    The Clientele - “Bookshop Casanova” (2007)

The Clientele are a long-time Merge Records band that’s never really caught fire like some others, likely due to their spurts of inactivity and seeming reluctance to tour the U.S. in any meaningful way.  Their catalog is deep at this point, full of poignant moments of beauty and deceptively complex arrangements that invite repeat listens.  This song, though, is probably the closest they ever got at translating what they do into something that might catch a casual listener’s ear at first blush.  

13.    Howard Ivans - “Red Face Boy” (2013)

Howard Ivans is the alter-ego of Ivan Howard, co-leader of another Merge Records band, The Rosebuds.  While The Rosebuds always rooted their genre-experiments in the world of indie-rock, the Howard Ivans persona allows Howard to go full R&B, with wonderful results.  This was one of the first singles put out by Matthew E. White’s Spacebomb Records, and they went all out, with horns arranged by White and strings arranged by Trey Pollard, all cut to tape in Richmond, VA.

14.   BADBADNOTGOOD & Ghostface Killah (ft. MF Doom) - “Ray Gun” (2015)

BADBADNOTGOOD is, as far as I can tell, a bunch of nerds from Canada who play really inventine funk, soul and jazz music, and they made a whole record, Sour Soul, backing Ghostface Killa from Wu-Tang Clan.  I haven’t dived in too deep yet, but really like this song featuring the legendary MF Doom.  Doom and Ghostface have been teasing a collaborative album for years under the name DOOMSTARKS, but so far, nothing.

15.    Baby Huey - “Hard Times” (1971)

Larger than life at 400 lbs. and dead at 26 due to heroin, Baby Huey was not around long enough to make much of a mark.  But he did manage to record one full-length, produced by Curtis Mayfield, from which this song comes (the song was also penned by Mayfield).  There’s an amazing, nearly 10-minute performance of “A Change is Going to Come” on there too, but there wasn’t room this week (I reserve the right to put 10-minute long songs on this playlist, though).

16.    Craig Finn - “Something to Hope For” (2019)

I was never much of a Hold Steady fan -- I appreciated them more than I liked them.  But I feel like frontman Craig Finn is really coming into his own on the solo side of things, and the album he put out this year, I Need a New War, has some great moments, including this earnest, soul-inflected tune.

[cardboard-moon]

40 Things You Never Wanted To Know About Me

You probably already know me decently well or else you wouldn’t be reading this, so instead of rehashing the basic (boring) “getting to know me” questions I dug a little deeper and asked myself about what’s really important. Here is the result: 40 Things You Never Wanted To Know About Me. Enjoy!

1. What Parks and Rec character am I?

While I could argue for almost everyone on the show I’m probably most like Ben Wyatt: a white, brunette, and sad man who eats soup alone on a park bench (minus his love of math and rollerskate kink)

2: Top 5 books?

To Kill a Mockingbird, The Secret History, A Prayer for Owen Meany, The Help, 11/22/63

3: Top 5 movies?

Chinatown, Star Wars, Rear Window, National Treasure (nick cage can be good in small doses ok) and Nancy Drew (2007)

4: Top 5 shows?

Parks and Rec, B99, That 70′s Show, Mad Men, Arrested Development

5: Top 10 most iconic vines?

1) Chris is that a weed/Mary is that a police

2) Hi My Name is Trey I have A Basketball Game Tomorrow

3) Rebecca It’s Not What You Think

4) The one where the girl is just hitting elmo with a baseball bat

5) Anything Kermit but esp. the one where he falls off the building

6) You Know This Boy Got His Free Taco

7) 2 Bros Chillin in the Hot Tub

8) Waelcom to my Keeetchen we have bananis and avocadis

9) Whoever Threw That Paper Your Mom’s A Hoe

10) i spilled lipstick in your valentino bag (yOU SPILLED WHAHULAUG LIPSTICK IN MY VALENTINE WHITE BAG)

6: Where do I see myself in 21 years?

One of my dreams in life is to marry the heir to a prestigious winery out in wine country. I have a vision of myself at 39, waking up at 10 AM on a tuesday and standing on my private balcony in my state-of-the-art spanish stucco villa. i am drinking a chardonnay despite the early hour whilst i observe my grape empire in my silk negligee. the only event planned for the day is a portrait sitting for my rottweilers (4 of them), for which i have arranged spaces in the family’s private art gallery. i am aging well despite the harsh california sun and my partner and i have a trip to tuscany planned for the fall. it’s a charmed life and i never tire of eating grapes  

7: Top 5 favorite cryptids

1) Nessie (Nessie is a true lady I believe in her)

2) Mothman (not real)/ el chupacabra (possibly real)

3) the kraken (definitely real)

4) Bigfoot (not real but a legend anyways)

5) the yeti (real only in russia)

8: Do I Believe in Ghosts

It’s a complicated topic and of course we will likely never know for sure but the short answer is yes. in my opinion though, what ghosts are is the important question: are they really the dead coming back to haunt the earth? are they just manifestations of energy that the mind interprets into recognizable shapes? hallucinations? or is it wish fulfillment and the reduction of tensions on a heavy conscience? our brains are capable of powerful things, but it begs the question as to whether if a human desperately wants something to be true does the human mind have the power to make it true? c. s. lewis mentioned once that he never understood the ghost debate since, given that ghosts are real, they have no real power over us or anything interesting to say. but i believe that just goes to show how the mystery is far often more important than the solution.

9: Best/Worst Month of the Year

Best: May/November (spring/fall in full swing, holidays, time off school, great atmosphere) Worst: August (too dang hot & start of school)

10: What is one of my embarrassing secrets

I didn’t learn how to tie my shoes until I was nine (velcro ftw)

11: What is my Dream Date

We go cryptid hunting in the woods and have a picnic in the dark; you supply dogs for entertainment and guardianship purposes, i supply drinks and the cryptozoological myths we are chasing. Afterwards we get gelato

12: Top 3 Presidents

(this is based solely on arbitrary opinion not policies) 1) Barry Obama 2) Lincoln  3) Millard Fillmore (his name is funny) 

Honorable mention: jimmy carter (he was the only noncorrupt man in office for like 30 years before barry)

13: Top 3 Vice Presidents

1) John Adams, if nothing else but for the drama this man caused 2) Walter Mondale 3) the big boy JB 

Honorable Mention: Nichard Rixon

14: Top 3 Secretaries of State

1) Madeline Albright 2) Henry Clay 3) Elihu P. Washburn 

(note: secretaries of state have the funniest names, like Hamilton Fish (1869-1877) rest easy Mr. Fish)

15: Worst Activity they make you do in middle school PE

Middle school P.E. is the worst in general but I’m going to say either grading you on your shotput skills (?) or BMI (??) or just the tuesday run in general (luther kids know)

16: Top 4 Worst Scents

1) Washing a knife covered in peanut butter 2) Really cheap perfume that they sell in checkout lines at convenience stores 3) Olives 4) organic deodorant

17: Top 7 Conspiracy Theories

1) The Denver Airport is an underground military fallout shelter designed to protect the 1% from nuclear warfare

2) A Roman pope adjusted the Gregorian calendar so that his reign would fall on 1000 AD so we’re actually living in the year 1783

3) Paul McCartney is dead and was replaced prior to the Seargant Pepper album by a lookalike named Billy Shears

4) The state of Wyoming is a myth

5) Avril Lavigne died and was replaced back in the early 00’s

6) The Titanic sank because too many people went back in time to prevent it from sinking

7) Not to be cliche George Bush and the military-industrial complex orchestrated the 9/11 attacks (jet fuel can’t melt steel beams and all that)

18: Inside jokes with myself

I’m not usually a “gamer” but every year without fail someone introduces me to a game exactly at finals time and I get hooked and it ruins my gpa and study habits. This year it’s Stardew Valley, last year it was Dream Daddy and the year before that it was undertale and I blame Jojo for absolutely all of it bc they are usually the instigator. Anyway, every year I joke with myself about what game will derail my grades this year

19: Top 5 Worst Tactile Sensations

1) Putting tights or leggings on wet, hairy legs post-shower

2) Running fingernails along cardboard

3) Sweating in a turtleneck

4) Having wet, salty hair after swimming that drips down onto your back and makes the top of your shirt damp

5) Reaching into a bag of grapes and only finding really soft, slimy ones

20: Best Cat I’ve ever encountered

One time my friend and I were leaving Romancing the Bean and walking back to her car and the fattest, fluffiest, softest ginger cat I’ve ever seen came trotting up to us and flopped over at our feet. He was such a good boy!!! And so friendly with strangers!! He was very well groomed and just wanted some love, and whenever we stopped petting him he would jump up onto our legs and leave little wet paw prints everywhere, I wanted to kidnap him

21: Best dog I’ve ever encountered

All of them

22: Best squirrel I’ve ever encountered

My dad has befriended a squirrel named Nutty that likes to sneak into his office when the door’s open and steals peanuts. if the door is closed he’ll bang on it and scream until we acknowledge him

23: If I were a furry what would my fursona be

I do not know because I am not a furry. HOWEVER someone who is well-versed in furry matters told me once that I would be one of those long, nervous dogs like a greyhound maybe and tbh I could see it

24: Favorite/Least Favorite Disneyland Rides

My favorite has always been haunted mansion, except for the halloween season when it’s nightmare before christmas and then it’s thunder mountain. I just love the outside atmosphere of the house bc I’m a slut for that southern gothic architecture style. Worst is splash mountain because there’s no seatbelt and LOGICALLY i know I don’t need one but it doesn’t stop me from having a panic attack every time I get on and we go up the big hill as I worry about being flung from the toboggan across the park

25: Least favorite restaurant within 10 mile radius of my house

I live over by Porto’s so I am #blessed to be surrounded by some really dope food. However there is a hipster place a couple of blocks over in Toluca Lake that only serves bizarre food like fried chicken in maple syrup with waffle fries and it’s surprisingly bland, so the lack of taste combines with how expensive it is probably makes it the worst (it’s also forgettable bc I can’t even remember its name)

26: Rank of JBHS history department according to how good of a parent they would be

9.Mr. Bixler - I have never had this man so I can’t say shit. NA/10

8. Ms. Snowden - I’ve never had her either but I’ve heard enough about her between Burroughs and Luther to know that this woman is kind of scary, intimidating and uptight, all things I personally do not desire in a parent. 2/10

7. Mr. Hatch - I love Scott Hatch but he is a tremendous mess of a man. Judging by his wife’s instagram photos his idea of parenting is taking naps while cuddling his children and letting his wife do the rest of the hard work. Plus he seems like the type to be too wrapped up in his own melodrama and too busy hangin out with his best friend Edward Frankenbush playing Xbox to pay much attention to his kids. However, he did skip the first day of school to take his daughter to kindergarten so he gets points for that. 4/10

6. Mr. Lee - Mr. Lee is a very respectable guy who seems like he does a very good job providing for his family. He’s ranked as middle of the road because he’s a naturally private person so I can’t speak to his parenting tactics or personality much, however the few stories he shared about his daughter were very cute and he does the typical teacher/parent things like making her his screensaver on his computer. Overall, a very quality dad and man, 6.5/10

5. Mr. Fitz - Kyle Fitzgerald is similarly a mess of a man, but the difference between him and Scott Hatch is that he seems to make an investment in his kid. He always talks about current events in terms of what idiocy his poor daughter will have to put up with which shows his devotion to her well-being and survival in a confusing world. Also he brought her in to go swimming once while I was working at Verdugo and I got to see them having a great time on the splash pad and it warmed my heart. Great dad 7/10

4. Mr. Piper - Richard Piper is such a good father but in a detached way. He loves talking about his son and wife just as much as he loves talking about planes. The real kicker? When he talks about taking his son ON planes and geeking out over history together. He also asked all of his classes for people looking for tutoring work when his son was struggling in math which is so cute. Good guy Rick gets an 8/10.

2. (tie) Mr. Frankenbush and Ms. Hacker - Ed and Jan are both beautiful people. I know Ms. Hacker is #divisive but I personally am a big fan and would die to have her guidance in my daily life. She’s always interested in what’s going on in people’s lives and sure she’s definitely chaotic but it’s a loving chaos that’s only looking to help other people. I’ve not had the pleasure of having Mr. Frankenbush but he always is hanging out with his son Joey and they love coming to the Burroughs pool and playing water polo together; they spend a lot of time together since his wife works so much and they have such a buddy friendship. Both of these lovely people are super devoted and invested in the youth and would make great parents. 9/10

1. Mr. Clark - A god. We don’t deserve this man and I can’t sing his praises enough. Were were all lucky enough to be Greg’s children I don’t think evil would exist in the world. 11/10

27: Worst book I read for school

Hands down Tale of Two Cities since it’s the only one I’ve never finished. Dickens just doesn’t do it for me I guess plus I get really tired of the one dimensional characters and how much he romanticizes Lucy

28: Favorite little-known tidbit of history

When Richard Nixon went to Soviet Russia as Eisenhower’s VP during the cold war his secret service agents detected higher than usual amounts of radiation coming from Nixon’s hotel room, so they started talking loudly about it bc they knew the Soviets had planted buds and were listening. Within like an hour the radiation had vanished and they never heard anything about it again so man Soviet’s ain’t sly

29: 5 Places in Burbank That Are Definitely Haunted

1. Coral Cafe for obvious reasons, look up the ghost on youtube

2. The View seems like it would have some kind of el chupacabra-esque creature prowling around, maybe a mountain lion hybrid

3. Fry’s Electronics

4. The abandoned train station under the bridge

5. The LA river by the equestrian center

30: Rank of all the AP classes i took in order of entertainment value

9) AP Bio: I liked bio but the class wasn’t very entertaining. There’s not a lot of humor in bacteria and cells, and Mr. Van Loo is much more of a calming than a humorous and chaotic presence, so overall it takes the hit as the least entertaining class.

8) AP Stats: Math is similarly not very entertaining, but Mrs. Hollingshed’s erratic personality gives it the edge over Bio. Definitely more humorous than expected of a math class.

7) AP Econ: I bombed econ and business/money isn’t very entertaining but Jan Hacker made it so thanks to her chaos (love her though).

6) AP Euro: European history is incredibly iconic because, spoiler alert, Europeans are idiots and historically speaking everything that can go wrong, will go wrong. I just wish I remember it since I think idiot sophomore Lily slept through most of the class so needless to say I didn’t soak up much of the entertainment value. If it were up to me I’d take it over again and maybe stay awake this time.

5) AP Lit: Lit was just as much challenging and intimidating as it was entertaining, so it balances out. Mrs. Caluya is notably iconic and the books we read were all pretty interesting so it gets a high vote from me.

3) (tie) Gov/APUSH: History is always entertaining in my eyes since people do stupid things out of pettiness. These two tie for different reasons: Mr. Piper is a great teacher and that mock trial we did for the industrial age was great, but the subject was also extremely entertaining overall. I loved reading about how John Adams made making fun of him illegal. Gov was mostly just entertaining because of Mr. Hatch and how salty his is about the government. His sarcastic comments about how corrupt everything is gave life to an otherwise pretty lifeless subject.

2) AP Lang: aka the class with no curriculum, or the Kuglen Hour. I love Mr. Kuglen so much and he is responsible for 99% of the amusement in the class. I somehow learned how to be a better writer by listening to him complain about Trump and everything else under the sun for an hour every day so it was well worth it. Also who doesn’t like a class where you read Dave Sedaris for homework?

1) AP Psych: Without question, this is the epitome of entertainment. Psychology is just a mishmash of people trying to figure out why humans are as stupid as we are and why we do dumb things. Add in all the iconic psychologists and history and a class led by salty Mr. Hatch and you have a recipe for an entertaining year.

31: Top 5 Iconic JBHS teachers that I NEVER had (no particular order)

Mr. Peebles: A quirky man who I would have loved were I any good at math whatsoever

Mr. Arakelian: Band kids hate him but the stories I hear are so frickin iconic that I wish I could be an honorary band kid for a day and see the horror firsthand. If you have Arakelian stories please send them my way I’d love to hear about your pain

Mr. Frankenbush: A sad boi who everyone should get to experience and I regret never having.

Dr. Madooglu: He was so kind to me after the failed anti-trump lunchtime protest last year and he didn’t even know me. I wish I could’ve experienced him as a teacher.

Mr. Clark: The man, the myth, the legend

32: List of some iconic swim horror stories

Charlie breaking his hand after he lost a race and punched the gutter as hard as he could

Some idiot JV boys smearing poop all over the Burbank High locker room

The entire JV team getting Burroughs swim banned from Islands

Me almost passing out at the Los Amigos meet last year after I didn’t eat or sleep all day

Everyone always feigning illness or injury to get out of swimming the 4x100 relay

Getting in trouble for watching boys volleyball practice instead of doing the weight room sets

Every. Single. 5AM morning practice before school.

When coach martin finally figured out how periods work and suddenly we couldn’t use that as an excuse for not swimming anymore

33: What Office Character Would I Be

A mix between Angela, Oscar, and Kelly (we love our dramatic icons)

34: #1 Thing I’d Bring With Me to a Desert Island

Castaway for instructional purposes

35: What Would I call my memoir

Schadenfreude

36: 7 Best Buzzfeed Unsolved Episodes (no particular order)

This is one of my favorite shows so these are my recommendations:

1. 3 Horrifying Cases of Ghosts and Demons - one of the very first and best episodes; a 45-minute special where the Boys investigate the Winchester house in San Francisco, the Island of the Dolls in Mexico, and the Sallie House in Kansas

2. The Strange Disappearance of D. B. Cooper - A man going by the name of Dan Cooper hijacked a plane, demanded money and passage to Mexico, and then at some point jumped out of the plane and was never seen again. To this day no one knows his identity or his fate despite some of the ransom money turning up in a river somewhere.

3. The Haunted Halls of Waverly Hills Hospital - Ryan and Shane explore an abandoned asylum in Pennsylvania and some creepy stuff ensues. One of the best supernatural episodes

4. The Thrilling Gardner Museum Heist - An almost hilarious story (with reenactments!) about a seriously inept security guard and the loss of some of the world’s most beloved paintings. This was one of the first episodes after they started making money and the production quality is off the charts 

5. The Scandalous Murder of William Desmond Taylor - Another excellent reenactment story about one of Hollywood’s first and biggest scandals, the suspicious murder of a leading film producer.

6. The Enigmatic Death of the Isdal Woman - A woman’s body was found suspiciously burned in the European wilderness and no one knows who she is or how exactly she was killed. Watch if you like espionage!

7. The Strange Killing of Ken Rex McElroy - An entire town seemingly rose up to murder a douchey, violent pedophile. One of the only episodes that’s actually happy?

37: 6 Things I would Have Changed About High School

1. Definitely would have joined yearbook as soon as I could

2. Wouldn’t have forced myself to swim for all 4 years; if the passion’s gone then you shouldn’t force it. It’s just a sign that you need to move on to better things

3. I would’ve taken more AP’s and maybe tried another stem ap class. I’ve always been self-conscious about how bad I am at math, but I’ve gotten a little better over the years and instead of being too afraid to challenge myself I would’ve liked to see how I could do and prove myself.

4. Worrying less about grades!! I killed myself over my grades for like three years and then I just kind of let myself go. I would have let myself have who knows how many more hours of sleep and taken the L on a couple of assignments; I’m still learning that my health is more important than perfection.

5. Meeting the right people! I wouldn’t have restricted myself to a few friends and would have branched out more by joinng stuff like JSA. It sucks meeting the right people your senior year and realizing that I was hanging out with the wrong people this whole time.

6. Spanish instead of French.

38: What Would I Name My Farm Animals if I had A Farm

I’d definitely name them all after female Shakespearian characters. My cows would be Hippolyta and Titania from Midsummer, my horse would be Desdemona from Othello, my chickens would be Gonereil, Regan, and Cordelia from King Lear and my goat would be named Gertrude from Hamlet

39: Most Useless Talent I Have

I have a really strong internal clock so when I don’t think about it too hard and guess intuitively I can usually predict how much time has passed/what time it is without looking at a clock. It’s really only useful for estimating how much time I wasted standing in the shower staring at the wall

40: Top Regret After Writing This:

Writing this instead of studying for my econ test in seven hours.

Thanks for reading!

[greenandhazy]

it occurred to me that if I'm going to post this I might as well include a snippet. also, I'm a v visual person so when I first started writing these characters, I picked out extras from the Turton's scene that seemed to have at least some visual personality I could work with--conveniently, there are a few shots where you can see almost all of them at once, so I've included a handy key beneath the cut

“Don’t lecture me. I know it already.” Evelyn’s voice is short, and he crosses his legs. “Matter of fact, don’t lecture Teddy either. It wasn’t a habit. But if a toff wants a chicken, of course he thinks the easiest way is to pay for it--you saw him, black tie and all, more money than sense--and if a young skint lad like Teddy is offered two funt to go with a man he wanted to go with anyway, why shouldn’t he take it?”

Chris eyes him suspiciously.

“Teddy wasn’t a renter normally?”

“No.”

“He had no prior charges? He wasn’t walking the streets?”

“No.”

“Then how were the peelers to know where the money came from? He didn’t tell them?” he adds when Evelyn squirms.

“He didn’t want them to think he’d stolen it,” he sighs. “Only takes one look at him to know he doesn’t usually walk around with two pound in his pocket. He told them it was a gift. He wouldn’t tell them who particularly--had enough sense for that, at least. And between you and me, I think the toff’s part of why he’s not doing well, too. Teddy thought he’d be like you, getting trey billy doos a week--”

“Getting what?” Chris interrupts. Bits of slang make their way up north, in the slow rambling way all fashions get from London to York, but no one’s so fluent as Evie. He tilts his head again and grins, a triumphant little smirk that says he’s having a bit of fun at Chris’s expense.

“Love letters. Three a week.”

“I don’t get love letters,” Chris protests, praying to God that his poker face can stand up to someone who knows him as well as Evelyn does. His friend looks pointedly and ostentatiously at the half-finished letter on the table, and Chris pushes it behind him. “Stop that. What’s wrong with Teddy?”

“Well, that toff--Henry, his name is, don’t know his surname--he talked all sweet when they were in the waggon, about how sorry he was and that, and he swore he’d keep in touch and do him a good turn. All the promises men make. Well, he hasn’t. He played the respectable card to the judge, all oh it was his first time there, stumbled across it, overcome with curiosity but terribly sorry and would never dream of going again. Got out in three bloody months and Teddy hasn’t heard a word out of him since. Poor dally lad, his heart is breaking.”

(technically I think the show is too early for it to be in the heyday of Polari but I'm making Evelyn a London transplant so I can get away with it. I've had a Polari dictionary since high school and this is my best chance to really put it to use.)

made some memes to describe my current emotional state

[thefantasysuite]

Arie’s Bachelor Preview

Finally. Maybe it just seems longer because I didn’t post much during ette or paradise, but it’s about time we got some new info on the OG of dating shows. The cast has finally been released. I’m going to assume that like me, your heart skipped a beat when you got that google alert stating as much. I glanced at a few pictures, but have held off reading anything about any of the ladies to make sure I captured first impression. You wouldn’t stand out there greeting each as she comes out of the limo and then get black out drunk and not remember what you first thought the next morning. Unless of course you are a contestant on this show and have already stalked the bachelor for months on end. In that case, pass the alcohol.

If you’ve followed this blog at all you know I like to stay away from off season drama. You had your 15 mins of fame. As Mr. Wonderful eloquently puts it:

But since it’s the season of giving I’ll give you a quick update on last year’s bachelor, Nick. Him and Vanessa broke up. The end. But seriously, this is what they looked like right after they were able to make their ‘arrangement’ public:

Yeah. Good job convincing everyone that was going to last.

Alright Moving right along. The bachelor this year is Arie Luyendyk:

I don’t remember feeling strongly about Arie one way or another when he was on. I do remember feeling strongly about the bachelorette that he was chasing after however:

Back to Arie. He comes from a family that likes to race cars. The F1 circuit to be precise. For all intents and purposes I’m going to group that in with NASCAR because the jokes are easier. Matt and Trey got 22 minutes out of making fun of NASCAR:

I can do a season of the bachelor.

Arie’s bachelor announcement doesn’t come without some controversy. He may have broken up with girlfriend right before he became the bachelor:

http://www.etonline.com/exclusive-arie-luyendyk-jrs-ex-girlfriend-says-she-was-blindsided-bachelor-casting-their-breakup

It also appears Arie has a type when you look at his ex compared to the former bachelorette:

Enough about Arie. Let’s see the skanks that will be racing after his heart (get used to a bunch corny puns relating to his former profession)

Ali

Ali is a personal stylist. Got a quick tip for Ali. Next time ABC offers to have their professional stylist help you out before your headshot, don’t say “I got this”. The most embarrassing thing she listens to is Nickelback. While unrelated, please check out this clip of another Chad Kroeger fighting his local government to keep house parties a god given right:

The Beastie Boys would be proud

Amber

3 people dead or alive you’d like to have lunch with. You can tell a lot about a person in how they answer. Starting your list off with Kim Kardashian says more than enough. What can you possibly ask her in which the honest answer isn’t “sex tape”? How did you get so famous? Sex tape. How did you break into the industry? Sex tape. What drove your step dad to become a woman? Sex tape

Annaliese

I feel like Annaliese misunderstood the question 5 things you can’t live without. She listed 3 different types of food and 2 emotions. I think the producers are looking for you to say something like wi-fi and your favorite hoody. She also listed Miley Cyrus and Chrissy Tiegan as people she would want to be. Guessing there isn’t much going on upstairs with this one

Ashley

Ashley looks super boring. Doubt she makes it past night 1. She hates doing laundry because it takes her a week to go from washing her clothes, to folding, to putting them away. Pft. I leave that shit in the dryer and go grab a pair of socks and underwear as needed. Amateur

Becca K

Becca has quite the jawline on her. Hopefully she has a smokin hot body. Becca is a publicist. You know who was also a publicist? Fucking Shauna:

Something tell me Becca is publicizing people more like Johnny Drama and less like Vincent Chase

Bekah M

Bekah is very intriguing. This might be a first, but her age isn’t listed in her bio. And I really want to know what it is. Her profession is nanny so I would assume she’s pretty young. But past contestant Corrine also had a nanny and she was pretty old. I know it’s because of the hair, but I’m getting a Morena Baccarin vibe:

I’ve got my eye on this one

Bibiana

I’m guessing Bibiana has quite a bit of personality. This has to be the girl other girls hate, right? She’s an executive assistant and former NFL cheerleader. I vote Bibi as most likely to tell everyone that she isn’t there to make friends and to start calling Arie her man

Bri

Bri is a sports reporter. I needed to look it up to be sure:

Now I’m not saying someone that’s already been on TV can’t fall in love with someone else on TV. But if she gets to the final 3 this season, fans like her, and a sideline job happens to open up with ABC she may have her eyes on a prize other than Arie

Brittane J

At the risk of making an off(on)-color joke, I’m going to guess that is a new way to spell Brittany. And is she winking? Lunch with 3 people dead or alive she went with Whitney Houston, Bernie Sanders, Beyonce. When the bill came Bernie made sure that Whitney Houston’s estate paid for her meal before the new tax bill gets rid of the death tax. (Hey. She got political, not me)

Brittany T

Seeing her listed as Brittany T confirms that the previous girl does pronounce it as Brittany. This Brittany would like to have lunch with Chris Evans, Hillary Clinton (shudder), and Beyonce. When Chris Evans goes on a coke binge he better hope he stays away from the bathtub to relax afterwards (See Whitney Houston above). Also, do you think Hillary ordered a side of beef at lunch? I remember when she got chucked into a van like a side of beef at a 9/11 memorial ceremony:

#neverforget

Caroline

I’m out on Caroline. She doesn’t have a dog yet, but can’t wait to find someone to “co-parent” a dog with. You would be a dog owner, not a parent. I bet she also can’t wait to “play house” with Arie. She’s going to be that girl that Arie tries to have a serious conversation with and can’t stop giggling while talking about how much fun they have together

Chelsea

Chelsea is boring and generic. Sticks out in no way. Not pretty. Not ugly. Thinks France is the most romantic city. Listed grade school sports as something she did competitively (read: unathletic). Likes warm weather, but not too warm. I don’t see anything here. I suspect an early pass (racing jokes) from Arie

Jacqueline

I’m trying to figure out who Jackie looks like. Right now I’m stuck on a poor (very poor) man’s Winnie Cooper:

I don’t think that’s the right answer, so I am open to suggestions. I also kind of wanted to look up Danica McKellar so I’m not mad. This will never work out though. She keeps talking about her career and how important it is to her. Career first women don’t win. They usually become the bachelorette. Not that I’m suggesting that will happen. Just that she has no chance

Jenna

Jenna is a social media manager from Indiana. Speaking of, I need to fire mine. When she eventually reads this post I expect https://twitter.com/thebachtweets to be updated with the new season flair. Jenna’s favorite show is Friends. I’m going to diagnose her as Monica. Looks like she is bubbly, can provide some comic relief when necessary, and probably has a nerdy brother named Ross that keeps finding ways to screw up everything with his much hotter girlfriend. How you doin’??

Jenny

Jenny’s most afraid of picking the wrong person to marry. I guess you can’t make that mistake if the bachelor picks you. She probably has nightmares about being the bachelorette. Many of her answers indicate that she’s outdoorsy and loves adventure. She looks just the opposite. Maybe her idea of camping is hanging out in a motor home watching netflix while a fire burns outside

Jessica

Jessica’s occupation is television host and I immediately couldn’t wait to look up which show. Then I saw she was from Canada, which isn’t real tv. Is Degrasi still on? But then I looked her up and it’s worse than Canadian tv host. She has a youtube channel called Jessica Carroll TV.......(So what if I watched the video ‘Get Pool Party Ready). So we have smoking hot girl living in LA that’s used to the camera. Guess who might get called out first for not being there for the right reasons

Kendall

I feel like Kendall has a drink in one or both hands of this picture. This chick is weird. If she could be any animal she went with bat. Most romantic gift was an alligator hand holding an iron heart in a jar because she collects taxidermy. As long as it wasn’t an alligator holding a human hand. Carl Weathers would have been pissed:

Krystal

Krystal is one of those fitness nuts. I feel like that’s a profession/hobby that never does well on this show either. She says she is most afraid of unused potential. Lol. She must moonlight as a life coach. Trying to remember back to when Arie was on the bachelorette he didn’t strike me as a real go getter. I feel like Krystal is going to push him to be better and Arie will end up channeling his brother in name and hit her with:

Lauren B

I think Lauren B goes far. Pretty girl. No weird answers. What is my first rule about going on this show? Don’t be weird. She has a second degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do. By the way, whatever happened to Billy Blanks?

Lauren G

Lauren has the real descriptive occupation of executive recruiter. Her favorite tv show is ‘This is Us’. I’ve never seen an episode, but based on the people that watch it and from what I’ve heard it sounds like one long ass chick flick. It’s like tv networks needed to try and scoop up the ‘Parenthood’ audience that loves mushy feel good/make you cry stories and we ended up here. Those shows are the worst (And no, the bachelor is not the scripted reality version of those shows).

Lauren J

Lauren is honest. Asked if she’s neat or messy, she concedes to being messy. Doesn’t like playing games with guys, just tells them how she feels. Eats full meals in bed. Can’t live without mascara. She’s also 33 so no time to beat around the bush. I think she’ll end up getting super jelly when she sees Arie making out with other girls. I’m gonna say she ends up in the top 5. Arie wants a young girl to parade around for a little while. Lauren is probably trying to have kids tomorrow

Lauren S

The run on Lauren’s continues. We’ve got another social media manager on our hands. It’s funny thinking back to the first season of the bachelor and knowing how that job wouldn’t have even existed. When asked if she could be anyone in the world she went with ‘anyone in Taylor Swift’s girl squad’. You wouldn’t want to be....I don’t know....Taylor Swift instead? Not very lofty girls for this one. She’s an early out

Maquel

Maquel? Whatever. Guess we are just making names up at this point. Her favorite holiday is Halloween. She loves dressing up and creepy/scary stuff. I’m guessing she is more Cady and less Regina:

Marikh

Maybe the weirdest answer to a question that I’ve seen:

What? So you don’t want to accidentally confirm an incorrect assumption? Keep in mind that she was asked this question, had time to think it over, decided to go with that. I think Marikh might break down if asked where she wants to go to eat. “I love Olive Garden but I hate their breadsticks and salad and pasta so let’s go there”

Nysha

Nysha looks like she’s embarrassed to take this photo and have an official Bachelor headshot that will live forever. I don’t see Nysha doing real well this season. Her answer on favorite tv show and fictional character comes off as a bit “I don’t need no man”. Try not to make a scene when you don’t get a rose

Olivia

Olivia is 23. She looks even younger than that. Favorite book is 50 shades of grey. Not sure she was old enough to read that when it first came out. Do you think she secretly hopes Arie has a sex dungeon? Probably would have been a good intern for Matt Lauer. 

Seinne

I’m going to guess that Seinne is this year’s Rachel (you know what I’m getting at). Favorite tv show is Game of Thrones. I don’t care for the show. Watched the first season and couldn’t believe I wasted that much time. Don’t get the appeal at all. If I hear Dilly Dilly one more time I’m going to fucking lose it

Tia

Tia could win this year, be the girl that everyone hates, or be the next bachelorette. I’ll know by the end of the first episode, but right now I have no clue. I’m looking for key things in her answers and she says ‘sassy’ as well as having gone to a swingers resort. I’m going to go with the one everyone loves to hate. But I reserve the right to change my mind

Valerie

Valerie is a server in Nashville (failed country music artist). She’s 25 and has over 50 Halloween costumes. Maybe she celebrates it multiple times a year. I just hope she doesn’t have that thick twang when she talks. That’s so annoying

There they are. The desperate fame whores looking to make their mark January 1st. I do wonder about airing the premiere on the 1st. I know there isn’t a ton of crossover between individuals when it comes to the bachelor and college football, but I can imagine a fight or two between couples when it’s the football semi-finals vs bach premiere. The game airs on ESPN which is of course owned by ABC’s parent company of Disney. I would suggest holding off a week but the national championship game is played that next Monday. 

See ya after the premiere

- Nick

[dustedmagazine]

Dust: Volume 3, Number 12

Pessimist

In early fall, the pace of record releasing and reviewing picks up, and with the new chill in the air, we all realize that we are way behind on everything. So to clear the pipes and celebrate what we’ve been meaning to celebrate all along, here is a new back-to-school issue of Dust. This time, we had a really broad range of participants covering all manner of music -- Bill Meyer, Ian Mathers, Matt Wuethrich, Derek Taylor, Eric McDowell, Michael Rosenstein, Jennifer Kelly and Mason Jones.  

176 — Music in Eight Octaves (Immediata)

IMM011: Music In Eight Octaves by 176

Ever wonder what Conlon Nancarrow’s music for player pianos would sound like stretched out over 50 minutes? If so, this is it. Pianist Anthony Pateras and fellow keyboardist Chris Abrahams of The Necks recorded this 50-minute performance in 2005, but are releasing it now as part of Pateras’ Immediata project, along with the series’ obligatory liner notes dialogue between Pateras and the other performer.  

The only formal structures the two seem to rely on are a stacking of temporal layers, timbral density, and surging intensities. There are no quiet or reflective moments here, the sound being continuous and mostly very fast, but neither is this uncontrolled cacophony. At times, there is so much activity the piece almost reaches stasis; at others, the sheer amount of pointillist notes is overwhelming. The tension between these poles creates, however, an engaging contradiction: hyperactive music that demands absolute concentration.

Matt Wuethrich

 1982 — Chromola (Hubro)

It makes sense that the trio 1982 is named for the band’s baby, drummer Øyvind Skarbø. He was nervy enough to get the project rolling when he asked Hardanger fiddle player Nils Økland, 20 years his senior, to play an improvised gig together after Økland gave him a lesson. Ten years on Skarbø, Økland, and harmonium/pipe organ player Sigbjørn Apeland are still at it, performing music that is simultaneously true to the sonic signatures of their instruments and the impulse to play things their own way. Which means that Apeland doesn’t shy from the churchy sounds his instruments were conceived to make, but he’s also willing to tangle some tone clusters up in Skarbø’s rustle and rumble. Likewise Økland, who also plays a conventional violin, lets his melodies unfold patiently, all the better to let the overtones radiate from his strings and form a halo of sympathetic vibrations. But he’s also right in there with his fellows, complicating the dissonances and accenting the rhythms. Skarbø moves fluidly between measured cadences, pulse-free surges, and patient silences, contributing most by contributing just what the music needs.

Bill Meyer

 Antoine Beuger — Ockeghem Octets (Another Timbre)

The title of Antoine Beuger’s latest for Another Timbre may mislead the uninitiated. Part of an additive series of homages to some of the Wandelweiser co-founder’s favorite artists and thinkers — Dedekind Duos, Cantor Quartets, Favery Tunings for Fourteen — Ockeghem Octets does reference the influential 15th-century Flemish composer of masses, motets and chansons, however obliquely. What Beuger distills from Ockeghem is the canon form: Each of the 25 pieces represented on this disc find the octet divided into two halves, each half playing a different line of four tones, entirely at each musician’s own pace. That playing through these micro-compositions takes nearly 70 minutes (over a single unbroken track) suggests the octet’s approach to the material — unhurried, to say the least. But when you consider that Beuger is the same composer who’s written a piece that asks audiences to listen to a solo musician “basically sitting in silence, very rarely playing one single very soft, rather short sound,” followed by anywhere from 20 to 80 minutes of complete silence, the Ockeghem Octets’ glacially shifting layers start to seem positively gaudy with harmonic and timbral colors. An exaggeration, of course, but phase one of the initiation into Beuger’s sound world is adjusting your perspective.

Eric McDowell

 Dungen — Häxan/Versions by Prins Thomas (Smalltown Supersound)

A couple of years ago, Dungen were asked to create a new soundtrack to Lotte Reiniger’s early 1926 animated film "The Adventures of Prince Achmed,” which led to the first instrumental album from Dungen, Häxan. Here, Prins Thomas takes that album's music and creates a new experience, over an hour of songs constructed using more or less of the originals. Some pieces are based on a few sounds, while others are primarily rearranged from the original tapes.  

When it comes to the recognizable pieces, Thomas mostly finds a way to accentuate the core. Just taking opener "Peri Banu vid sjön" as an example, the original is a slow, reverbed drum beat and floating synth tones, peaceful and vaguely pretty. The version here, stretched to five minutes, takes its time getting going, the warbly synth melody leading to the drums entering with a rather Floydian touch. In this version the reverb's gone, and everything's more immediate.  

Elsewhere, there's some good steady space rock, and plenty of kosmische stylings, with parts that have the head-nodding mekano beats of Neu! and their descendants, and "Kalifen" is one of the most Floydian songs that's come along in some time, harkening back strongly to Atom Heart Mother-era synth scapes. Others, though, come off as kind of soft-psych filler.  

Ultimately, although there's plenty of creative reconstruction here, nearly all of the songs carry on past the length they can support, not surprising given that a 40-minute album was rebuilt to 67 minutes. More aggressive editing could have honed this to a stronger core, but even so, if you're looking for a drawn-out hazy journey you could most definitely do worse.  

Mason Jones  

 The Elks — This Is Not the Ant (Mikroton)

This Is Not The Ant by The Elks

The great thing about the Berlin/Vienna Improv scene is the quirky collaborations that pop up between musicians of disparate backgrounds. The Elks is a perfect example, pulling together trumpet player Liz Allbee, clarinetist Kai Fagaschinski, tape manipulator Marta Zapparoli and audio-visual munger Billy Roisz. Across four cuts (two around five minutes long and two over twice that), the four pile together shredded tones, corroded timbres, arcing oscillations and hissing static into improvisations that buzz and thrum with an unstable energy. What’s particularly striking here is how the four eschew any sense of improv arc, instead diving in to a bucking collective flurry that can break into muted calm or vault to thundering stridency at any moment. One minute, Fagaschinski’s low-end clarinet tones hum and drone against a low-level thrumming electronic pulse. The next Allbee’s sibilant hiss kicks in against a whorl of electronic scree. Overtones meld with feedback, burred harmonics and glitched tapes are scumbled together. Braying trumpet, quavering chalumeau and sputtering electronics coalesce and then break open to dark, tolling low-end reverberations. The seamless mix of acoustic and electronic instruments makes for a rich palette which bares glints of detail within the constantly shifting field of sound.

Michael Rosenstein  

 Footings — Resolver (Don’t Live Like Me)

Resolver by Footings

Hey, a local band! Not living in anything remotely resembling a “scene,” this doesn’t happen to me often, but Thing in the Spring proprietor Eric Gagne slipped me a DL of his alt-country-ish, slacker rock Footings’ latest recording, and what do you know, it’s pretty good. I caught them a month or two ago opening for alt-Baptist-roots-revivalists House & Land, and the main problem then was that the guitar drowned out everything else. Here, with a proper mix, the slash of indie guitar (think Sebadoh or Jason Loewenstein solo) still dominates, but there’s enough space for Elizabeth Fuschia’s viola to seep through, whether in resonant bowed throbs (“Hopelessly”) or pizzicato plucking (“Vibrations, Too”). You can also hear the singing, which alternates from a rough but rueful rock howl a la Silver Jews or David Bazan in the louder songs to a sensitive country croon in the soft ones, which may put you in mind of Richard Buckner. As in the live set, “Pajo” stands out, with its circling, swirling, enveloping melancholy, but stick around for the very acoustic “Pollen” which tamps down the mayhem to minimum and finds a quiet revelation in picked acoustic, string tones, soft duet singing and the roll of cymbals.

Jennifer Kelly

  Joe Goddard — Electric Lines (Domino)

Goddard’s had plenty of side projects outside of his main gig at Hot Chip, but a listen to the accomplished, wide-ranging Electric Lines makes it clear why he calls this his solo debut. The warmth and dancefloor nous Goddard brings to Hot Chip are in evidence here too; the difference is more in sonic terms than emotional timbres. Here Goddard mostly takes the more traditional electronic producer's backseat to a rotating cast of singers (sampled and not) over an assorted but solid set of productions that range from the affectionate throwbacks of "Home" and "Lose Your Love" to the restrained digital ballardry of "Human Heart" and "Nothing Moves" to more purely banging "Lasers" and "Bumps.” The result is a kaleidoscopic but always endearingly humane tour through the various vistas of electronic music, culminating with the heart-rending, melancholy directness of his Hot Chip partner Alexis Taylor's vocals on the title track and singer SLO's joyful resolution on closer "Music is the Answer." That faith in his art form is one of the reasons that Goddard's work, in a band or here on his own, is so fulfilling.  

Ian Mathers

  Lo Tom— Lo Tom (Barsuk)

Lo Tom by Lo Tom

David Bazan first played with the guys in Lo Tom — that’s Trey Many, TW Walsh and Jason Martin — about the time they all started shaving, as part of a surprisingly fertile NW enclave of Christian-centered rock (that also included Damien Jurado, but forget him for the moment, he’s not in Lo Tom). All four of them have gone on to other bands, Bazan maybe the best known of the bunch for Pedro the Lion and his solo discs, but Many in Velour 100 and Starflyer 59, Walsh with Pedro, too, and Martin, also in Starflyer 59. Lo Tom is a kind of low-stakes, tossed off side project, performed mostly for the love of the game, but executed with a loose, comfortable, red-meat-rock brio that bends big guitar licks and rough poetry to the task of exploring mid-life issues. Bazan is in very fine form in these eight songs, exhibiting a trademark mordant directness, which is blunt enough to make you laugh, though you’re never sure whether he’s trying to be funny. The protagonist in “Bubblegum,” for instance, is mystified when he repeatedly wakes up with rubbery clumps of gum in his hair, “You blink your eyes and wonder how did it even get there/it’s not even the flavor of gum you chew/but either way your head’s stuck to your pillow, what’s wrong with you?’  You tell me, humorous or tragic? The lyrics, delivered in Bazan’s buzz cut baritone, are wrapped in a big-shouldered indie guitar racket, reminiscent of early aughts indies like Silkworm and Built to Spill. It’s loud and abrasive on the outside with a soft emotional center, the tough guy with a wry self-deprecating smile and a dog-eared copy of Seamus Heaney poems in his back pocket. What more could you want?

Jennifer Kelly

Milked — Death on Mars (Exploding in Sound)

Death on Mars by Milked

Chicago punk rocker Kelly Johnson has sweetened his sound since his Geronimo! days, kicking up a fizzy, rackety, ear-wormy sound that recalls the Rock A Teens, Red Kross and Exploding Hearts. “White Punks,” which bemoans the life-art balancing act of indie rock wage slavery, churns to a start with monster bass and a careening guitar vamp that owes a little to “Smells Like Teen Spirit.”  “Caledonia” is fizzier, more melodic, jangling like a particularly tuneful key ring in a working man’s pocket. And “Death on Mars,” the title track, is a punk romantic anthem, blaring in hearts-on-sleeve endearing-ness with slow, syrupy, overblown guitars with a plan for life partnership spanning the solar system. All nine tracks are irresistible hits of power pop aggression, rough on the edges and likely loud as fuck in the room, but bursting with a hand-drawn valentine’s worth of good feeling. Death on Mars came out early this summer as part of Exploding in Sounds’ tape series, and if you missed it, stay tuned for the next one. Johnson doesn’t sound like he’s anywhere near done with this exuberant project.

Jennifer Kelly

  Shane Parish—Ballad of an Unarmed Man  (Self-released)

Ballad of an Unarmed Man by Shane Parish

Musicians rarely get to capture their epiphanies in a shareable form, but Shane Parish lucked out. The Asheville NC guitarist, who tours and records with Ahleuchatistas and keeps a variety of other duos with players such as Michael Libramento and Tashi Dorji, has cultivated a formidable variety of playing modes, which has also come in handy in his day job as a guitar teacher. One night in February 2016 he sat down with the charts to a few American folk tunes, an acoustic guitar and the digital recorder that he uses for study. He started playing and found himself in a psychic and musical zone that felt simultaneously new and familiar. He was, at least for the time, home. Parish went on to develop this material into Undertaker Please Drive Slow, a superb solo album that Tzadik released at the end of 2016, but has decided to put out the original flash of inspiration as a download-only release. What’s remarkable about these performances is how at home he already sounds with a fairly personal approach to traditional material. He doesn’t exactly play it straight, nor does he prioritize a particularly improvisational language and he certainly doesn’t hew to the raga-tinged fingerpicking contemporary of American Primitive practice. Instead familiar melodies slip in and out of focus in a matter that feels akin to memories being recovered, even though that’s not what Parish was doing. You could get all speculative and say that maybe he was locking into something unconscious, or that you’re hearing a lifetime of skill-building aligning with the music on some sheets of paper in ways that the player could not foresee. What is clear is that Parish was onto something that night, and that this release provides a timeline node we can look to as we consider what he’s doing now and what comes next.

Bill Meyer  

 Anthony Pateras & Erkki Veltheim—The Slow Creep of Convenience (Immediata)

IMM010: The Slow Creep Of Convenience by Anthony Pateras · Erkki Veltheim

The title does double duty here as aesthetic and social statement. Aesthetically, “slow creep” captures the duo’s formal strategy: Veltheim’s electric violin and Pateras’ pipe organ are deployed as generators of long, continuous sounds, which flow over and against each other in dense layers of overtones and beatings through all levels of the frequency spectrum. Despite the single-minded approach, the performance is full of tension, energy and variety, with the duo having ample time to probe each subtle shift in timbre over the piece’s 50-minute duration. Socially, the title encapsulates the duo’s dialogue in the liner notes, where they dissect current contemporary musical and cultural practices, the discourse surrounding them and the effect technology has on both. This “formless” piece, they suggest, is one effort to reclaim our most valuable commodity: time.

Matt Wuethrich

 Pessimist — Pessimist (Blackest Ever Black) 

Bristol's Kristian Jabs, aka Pessimist, has been releasing EPs for several years now, but this self-titled album is technically his first full-length. Blending bits of drum and bass, techno, dub step, and cold, chilly experimental sounds, it works best when dealing in the combination of complex beats and warehouse ambience. It's difficult to describe the songs here without resorting to words like "cavernous" and "murky", though often the mechanical beats pull things out of the mud and onto the dance floor.  

As the score for an end-times dance, the reverb-laden factory floor beats here will do the trick. But while you can let these songs flow past in the background, they too often resort to the same tricks if you focus more closely. The result is that the first few pieces -- "Bloom" with its skeletal warehouse rhythms, "Grit" blending shadowy tones with mechanical beats, and the murky, panned tick-tocks of "Spirals" -- start the album pretty strongly, but as it continues things get more predictable. The rhythms, while often intriguingly layered, tend to be unchanging, and the move from beats to quiet floating to the sudden return of the beats is an overused trick.  

Taken individually, though, and certainly in the clubs, these tracks mostly work, with the shifting, interlocking beats of "Peter Hitchens" and the aforementioned "Bloom" particular standouts. The mix of sounds and attitudes Pessimist brings has a lot of potential. It shows through here and there, and the future holds yet more promise.  

Mason Jones

Saltland — A Common Truth (Constellation)

A Common Truth by Saltland

Rebecca Foon is (or ought to be) well known to fans of various Constellation acts; in addition to cofounding Esmerine, she and her cello have played with Thee Silver Mt. Zion, Set Fire to Flames and others. With her almost entirely solo project Saltland (here aided subtly and well by the Dirty Three's Warren Ellis and producer/Besnard Lakes frontman Jace Lasek on some tracks), her voice and cello take center stage and prove more than capable of holding that ground. It's relatively rare for an album split between instrumentals and vocal pieces like A Common Truth to be equally strong on both sides of the equation, but whether it's the foreboding drone of the opening "To All Us All to Breathe" or the layered cello and voices of the darkly pulsing "Light of Mercy," Foon's work consistently displays a darkly-hued beauty coupled with an intense, almost liturgical focus that marries the sound of the record with these songs' concern with the perils and complex nuances of climate change. With the summer much of the world is currently having, those issues need to be addressed more than ever; few reminders of this fact will be as enthralling as A Common Truth is. 

Ian Mathers

  Triptych - Michael Thieke : Tim Daisy : Ken Vandermark (relay 019) by Tim Daisy Michael Thieke Ken Vandermark

Michael Thieke/Tim Daisy/Ken Vandermark — Triptych (Relay Recordings)

Triptych is the latest in a series of fleeting encounters that Tim Daisy has documented on his Relay label. The Chicago-based multi-instrumentalist (drums, percussion, radios) invited Ken Vandermark (tenor saxophone, bass clarinet) and Michael Thieke (clarinet) into the studio to play three compositions and a handful of improvisations by the constituent members. It takes a bit of digging to grasp the title’s implications. While Daisy’s pieces celebrate the three musical personalities involved, they all seem to be very much on the same page. While the music shifts between stated and implied swing time, it does so quite cohesively, and the melodies make a case for Daisy’s growing elegance as a composer. But when you factor in the improvisations, it makes more sense. There is a pair of duets, one between the drummer and Thieke and the other between two clarinets, which display more elbows-out jostling than the compositions. There are also three solos that let you into the relationship between instrumentalist and instrument. Three ways of working, connected but separate — there’s your triptych.

Bill Meyer

 W-2—Fanatics (Astral Spirits)

Fanatics by W-2

The notion of battles between instrumentalists is built into jazz. You’ve got Ben Webster and Dexter Gordon on Tenor Titans, Sonny Rollins and John Coltrane on Tenor Madness, and these guys on the New York subway, all battling away. But W-2 say screw that divide and conquer shit; they may be going into battle when they play, but they’re pointing their weapons in the same direction, not at each other. Tenor saxophonist Sam Weinberg sounds like he’s taken a few lessons from Roscoe Mitchell. He’s got a similar affection for his horn’s extremes and a corresponding commitment to occupying the outer edges of pitch. Chris Welcome has his jazz guitar chops down, but in W-2 he sticks to synthesizer, blasting out dirty sputters and catch me if you can squiggles. Surrender while you can; these guys had you in your sets from the second you walked in the door.

Bill Meyer

  Judith Wegmann – Le Souffle du Temps (hat[now]ART)

Critic Brian Morton contributes a pithy and starkly simple piece of advice at the conclusion of his notes to Le Souffle du Temps. Make requisite time to listen to the music, as the musician made time to prepare for it. Play it again. Follow those simple instructions, and Morton confidently contends you’ll be playing it for years. The fourth dimension is a central aspect of pianist Judith Wegmann’s musical conception. Though she started playing at the age of six and studied jazz classical and improvised music earning two Master’s degrees along the way, this disc marks her debut as a leader. The training is evident, but what’s more striking is her mastery of pacing and placement. Preparing her instrument with an undisclosed array of objects and devices, the disc’s 10 pieces (delineated on paper by Roman numerals and temporal durations) transpire with a sustained air of both deliberateness and spontaneity, however incongruous that might sound. The clack of rocks or marbles, the brittle scraping of strings and the whistling creaks of metal on metal join sparely deployed keyboard notes and patterns to create a depth of field that becomes very easy to get lost in.

 Derek Taylor

[adultswim2021]

Aqua Teen Hunger Force #13: “Dumber Dolls” | November 3, 2002 - 11:15 PM | S02E05

Aqua Teen Hunger Force took a little bit of a hiatus and returned with one of their all-time greatest episodes. In Dumber Dolls, Frylock buys Meatwad a budget-priced doll named Happy-Time Harry, who is a sentient miserable prick who’s voiced by David Cross. David Cross is best known for Mr. Show, the world of stand-up, Arrested Development, and also being a sentient miserable prick who’s voiced by David Cross. Happy-time Harry has been beaten down by life, is suicidal, self-harming, angry, and worst of all, MEAN! Meatwad becomes more and more depressed after hanging out with his new doll, to the point where Frylock actually buys Meatwad the expensive doll he actually wanted, Jingle Billy. Jingle Billy is a happy-go-lucky hillbilly that dances at the drop of a hat and has his own pair of night-vision goggles. Jingle Billy blows his own head off with his musket after spending time with Happy-Time Harry. In 2002 I was still infatuated with David Cross and this episode not only didn’t disappoint, but it still resonates to this day despite my views on Cross evolving. I still like the guy more-or-less. Cross has this odd quality that I think can be summed up in a review I read of his first album, which stated that laughing at his comedy felt the same as laughing at your incredibly funny friend you’re hanging out with during a long late night of drinking beers and (does a backflip) ♪ smoking weeeeeeed ♪. I feel like when people fall in love with Cross’s comedy they sorta fall for this illusion that they’re kinda friends with him, because that’s just the vibe he gives off on stage. He’s comfortable, confident, and willing to mock you to your face because you’re pals! But by all accounts (including my own) he strikes me as enormously unfriendly; a bitter misanthropic crank who deep in his heart just wants to be left alone. I’m not judging him at all! That’s how I am most of the time, to be honest. Anyway, this is one of the funniest episodes they ever did. Aqua Teen was really strong during this era and this episode is a gem, and it’d probably make my list of all-time greatest Adult Swim episodes.

One last thing is: I can’t find my source on this, but I remember reading somewhere that this episode was supposed to air later in the season and Adult Swim simply played the wrong episode. This might be true, maybe Dumber Days was supposed to air instead? But I vaguely do remember this being advertised as a different episode airing. I should keep better notes.

MAIL BAG

London Arbuckle writes:

I remember attempting to write South Park fanfic in middle school, literally hand-written on lined paper so I could work on it in class or at lunch. One was just a flagrant ripoff of This Little Wiggy but with Barbrady's son. Another I just went off of the Chinkpokomon episode and did that but about Pokemon cards, because I was a child and into Pokemon cards, you see. Write what you know! Speaking of which, do you think Policy was just Adam Reed humorlessly documenting an actual fantasy of his?

I think it’d be really fun to do a project that involved attempting to recreate bad fan-fiction attempts from childhood. When I was a kid I remember delusionally  convincing myself I was writing a REAL episode, like a spec script that might be made into a real episode if only I could get a writing agent or whatever it is you do. I remembered trying to write a Seinfeld once. The cold open had Jerry doing stand-up about how Mario Bros. was promoting drugs, and the plot involved him trying to look like a badass to impress a girl but Kramer fills his apartment with dozens of cats, and the girl thinks he’s a wimp because he has an apartment full of cats.

Anonymous writes:

Hey its Matt Stone (Hey its Trey I'm here too but I'm just gonna chill out.) We saw your IRA protestant/prostitute idea and I gotta say we really think it's pretty fucking funny. Any chance of you coming to Colorado and fleshing it out along with any other ideas you have? Peace out. (Later.)

Oh wow! Thank you Matt I would love to! I’m not going to give away the whole idea here, but you know how everyone seems to think that cancel culture is good? Well, I have some, shall we say, differing opinions on the whole thing that you’ll probably find PRETTY interesting. Can’t wait to meet up. Are Colorado strip clubs allowing full-contact lapdances now?

Brandon writes:

So happy to see David Cross on Adult Swim again. His third appearance since Space Ghost's "Gallagher" and Night of the Living Doo with Gary Coleman. Hope this guy doesn't make himself a stranger on this late night block!

I think David Cross has a lot more up his sleeve so stay tuned!

This barely has anything to do with anything, but it’s about David Cross and I’ll say it here to my friend Brandon who will enjoy this: I remember a long time ago I saw a trailer for a student film made by a bunch of dopes and the premise was basically that talking junkie sketch from Mr. Show but it was about David Cross, like a guy believes in David Cross and is seeking the truth in the face of stuffy bureaucrats who keep telling him “there’s no such thing as David Cross!” and one of the big jokes in the trailer was they kept cutting back to one of the characters chugging what was probably tap water out of a vodka bottle. I wish I could find it. I wish I could find them. I wish I could help them.

[vulturehound]

Hi, and welcome to SteelChair’s Top 50 Tag Teams of the year. In previous years, we’d given you only the Top 10 teams but tag wrestling has just been so damn good this year, that we had to expand the list by five times (five times, five times, five times, five times). Here, we count down the 50-11 positions, covering the best talent that male and female tag team divisions around the world have to offer. When you’re done here, do check out the Top 10, when it’s live, to see if your favourite made it. Without further ado, let’s get started.

Words by Laura Mauro, Steph Franchomme, Humza Hussain, Tom Mimnagh, Tom Beasley, Joe Raczka, John Dinsdale, Dave Adamson, Bradley Tiernan, Stephen Goodman, and James Truepenny.

From 50 to 26

Click on a pic to open the gallery

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50 – Bea Priestley & Jamie Hayter (STARDOM)

49 – Boys II Men/Crashboat (Pop Punk Kid & Jack Bandicoot) – UK Wrestling

48 – Erick Rowan & Daniel Bryan (WWE)

47 – Cody & Dustin Rhodes (AEW)

46- Diamond Vogue Collective (Jinny & Mercedez Blaze) – EVE

45 – Pretty Deadly (Sam Stoker & Lewis Howley) – UK Wrestling

44 – Mei Suruga & Mei Hochizuki (SEAdLINNING)

43- Mercedes Martinez & Cheerleader Melissa (SHIMMER)

42 – Stronghearts (El Lindaman & T-Hawk) OWE/AEW

41 – Los Ingobernables de Japon (EVIL & SANADA) – NJPW

40 – Yuu & Chihiro Hashimoto (Sendai)

39 – Crazy Lovers (Masashi Takeda & Takumi Tsukamoto) – BJW / Japan Wrestling

38 – The North (Ethan Page & Josh Alexander) – Impact Wrestling

37 – The Young Guns (Luke Jacobs & Ethan Allen) – Futureshock Wrestling

36 – Bullet Club (El Phantasmo & Taiji Ishimori) – NJPW

35 – Birds of Prey (Will Ospreay & Robbie Eagles) – NJPW

34 – The Briscoes (Jay & Mark Briscoe) – ROH

33- Dark Order (Evil Uno & Stu Grayson) – AEW

32 – The Rascalz (Dezmond Xavier, Zachary Wentz & Trey Miguel) – Impact Wrestling

31- The IIconics (Peyton Royce & Billie Kay) – WWE

30 – Heavy Machinery (Otis Dozovic & Tucker Knight) – WWE

29 – More Than Hype (LJ Cleary, Nathan Martin & Darren Kearney) – OTT Wrestling

28 – Club Tropicana (Captain Sexsea & Aidan) – OTT Wrestling

27 – South Wales Subculture (Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster) – NXT UK

26- Tokyo Cyber Squad (Jungle Kyona & Konami) – STARDOM

From 25 to 11

25 – Queen’s Quest (Momo Watanabe & Utami Hayashishita) – STARDOM

One of Stardom’s most dominant stables, Queen’s Quest have been no stranger to championship gold this year. Momo Watanabe and Utami Hayashishita held the Goddess of Stardom Championship until July when they were divested of their gold by Tokyo Cyber Squad. But fear not! With the help of stablemate AZM, Queen’s Quest went on to claim the Artist of Stardom Championship.

24 – The New Day (Big E, Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods) – WWE – Were #3 last year

The New Day’s inclusion in the list of best tag teams may partly be due to their tenure, but despite Kofi’s singles run taking up most of New Day’s time in 2019, when called upon, they have continued to deliver in the WWE tag team scene. A perfect example being their great PPV outing with The Revival at Clash of Champions.

23 – Viking Raiders (Erik & Ivar) – WWE

The booking of the Viking Raiders has been questionable, and that dates back to their debut under the name ‘The Viking Experience’. But since consistently performing on Monday nights, Erik and Ivar have won over the crowd with their unique and breathtaking style (nicknamed “305 Live”), and this was clear for all to see in their fantastic title victory on RAW.

22 – Grizzled Young Veterans (Zack Gibson & James Drake) – NXT UK

Zack Gibson has always been one of the best antagonists on the microphone and NXT UK has rewarded the fans in spades! James Drake is a consistently strong performer and has become the perfect wingman to Gibson. Intense in-ring ability, a naturally dislikeable temperament and supreme confidence, Grizzled Young Vets have come to define NXT UK’s tag team division.

21- Woke Queens ( Debbie Keitel & Valkyrie) – EVE

You have to love Debbie Keitel and Valkyrie. Ireland’s enormously entertaining Woke Queens have only been operating as a dedicated duo since the beginning of the year, but they’ve made quite an impression already. Making their Pro Wrestling: EVE debut in June, the popular coffee-chugging, ABBA-loving pair fought off stiff competition to become the second-ever EVE Tag Team Champions.

20 – Santana & Ortiz (Impact Wrestling/AEW)

What is there to say about Santana and Ortiz? The former LAX have done it all in Impact Wrestling. They dominated Impact as a top draw and held the tag titles in several high-class feuds. Now they have branched out into AEW as Proud N Powerful and look set to do it all again going straight for the Young Bucks.

19 – Street Profits (Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford) – WWE

It has been a hell of a year for this high-energy duo, who won gold for the first time on the developmental brand before making the step up to the main roster. After several weeks as an enjoyable Greek Chorus on Monday Night RAW, Montez Ford and Angelo Dawkins have finally got in the ring, where they’re tearing it up.

18 – Anti-Fun Police (Chief Deputy Dunne & Los Federales Santos Jr) – UK Wrestling

Chief Deputy Damien Dunne, Los Federales Santos Jr, James & Leigh Obstruction (aka The Hunter Brothers, a team who could top this list on their own) and Cadet Joe Nelson have upheld the law in 2019 making sure there’s been no fun (aah) while easily stealing shows up and down the UK and Ireland. But never having fun, no fun, nada.

17 – Kabuki Warriors (Asuka & Kairi Sane) – WWE

The formation of the Kabuki Warriors was rough at best but now they look set to be a dominant force in the Women’s Tag Division. A vicious streak and ignorance of the rules have made them a threat to any woman on any show. They have rid themselves of Paige and are carving their own path of carnage through RAW.

16 – Villain Enterprises (PCO & Brody King)

This somewhat unlikely pairing has become one of the hottest teams in the US Indy scene. Winners of the ROH tag titles, the returning Crockett Cup and the NWA tag titles, Brody King and PCO have gone from strength to strength. And that doesn’t even take into account their success as the ROH 6-man champs along with Marty Scurll.

15 –  Reiwa Ultima Powers (DASH Chisako & Hiroyo Matsumoto)

DASH and Matsumoto are a true force of nature. Between them, Mika Iwata & Chihiro Hashimoto and Medusa Complex, 2019 has seen a resurgence in Sendai Girls’ tag division. The capper to this has been Reiwa Ultimate Powers claiming those Sendai Tag-Team titles. A fitting reward for a team that has pushed the art of tag wrestling like few others.

14 – The Revival (Dash Wilder & Scott Dawson) – WWE

The Top Guys were NXT darlings. They had promo skills, a classic style and the ability to put on excellent matches. Now they can finally do that on the main roster too as they were trusted with Tag Titles and some proper usage. They aren’t quite the joke they had been and should continue to be pushed as top guys.

13 – Best Friends (Chuckie T & Trent?) – AEW

Best Friends, Trent Beretta and Chuck Taylor (and sometimes Orange Cassidy), have a friendship so powerful it has encapsulated the love of many AEW fans. Their patented hug alone is a force strong enough to make any hard cam zoom backwards. Whilst they were unable to progress in AEW’s tag team tournament, they have captured many hearts this year.

12 – Jurassic Express (Luchasaurus, Jungle Boy & Marko Stunt) – AEW

Take Luchasaurus and Jungle Boy, and add Marko Stunt to the equation. It’s divided some AEW fans, yet it works! The wise guardian Luchasaurus is an impressive combination of hard-hitting and high-flying, Jungle Boy with a marketable look and talent to match and Marko Stunt as the annoyingly talented little guy who everyone remembers. Wrestling fans, get on board the Jurassic Express.

11- Guerrillas of Destiny (Tama Tonga & Tanga Loa) – NJPW

That Tama Tonga and Tanga Loa perennial IWGP champions and contenders had another banner year. They took the IWGP titles in February and moved on to the ROH/IWGP title match at MSG as double champions. While that may have been an artistic disaster, they’ve been power players ever since. World Tag League will define their 2020.

All pics courtesy of WWE, NJPW, OTT, ICW, Beyond Gorilla, Sendai Pro Wrestling, Stardom, SHIMMER, ROH, NWA, AEW, Grapple Wrestling, Progress Wrestling, EVE, SEAdLINNING, OWE, Machida Pro-Wrestling Festival, Laura Mauro, and Oli Sandler

SteelChair Magazine's Top 50 Tag Teams of The Year 2019 - Part 1

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Listen To The Music Play: How The Grateful Dead Remain Relevant In 2019 - 1A

In the list of last year’s biggest North American concert tours, among the expected big-name pop acts like Taylor Swift and Bruno Mars was Dead & Company, a mix of original Grateful Dead musicians along with new players mining the band’s extensive back catalog.

Dead & Company are unique on the list. Other older acts like Eagles or Billy Joel had scores of hits. The Dead rarely charted, and only had one top ten single — Touch of Grey, which peaked at number 9.

But it’s not so surprising. The Dead have been on a winding path (we won’t say “long strange trip”) from counterculture fame to modern appreciation. Besides major venues selling out Dead & Company shows, look at the world of fashion, where the Dead’s aesthetic remains en vogue. The latest single from Vampire Weekend has been cited for its sonic nods to Touch of Grey. And on stage with Dead & Company is none other than John Mayer, who has become a type of style icon.

So what makes the Grateful Dead’s words glow with the gold of sunshine? How does a band formed over 50 years ago remain not only relevant today, but influential?

This episode explains. And while you listen, read on to hear what fans, new and old, have to say.

Eric Renner Brown, 27, is an editor at music industry trade magazine Pollstar.

The Grateful Dead are the Great American Band. No other group united so many strains of American music — from rock to blues to country to jazz to psychedelia — so comprehensively, so singularly, and for so long. Like many, I first fell in love with the Dead through their studio masterpiece, 1970’s American Beauty. In college, I began a dive into their live recordings that continues to this day. The depth and volume of the Dead’s body of work keep them relevant today, especially given the comparatively brief and narrow careers of their classic rock peers. From internet databases of old shows to currently active Dead-adjacent groups including Dead & Company, Phil Lesh & Friends, and Joe Russo’s Almost Dead, connecting with the Dead’s music has never been easier. But above all, it’s the timeless nature of their songs, from hardscrabble gambling tunes to flower-power jams, that will make the band resonate for generations to come.

Tom Malach, 29, is the guitarist for Garcia Peoples, a rock band from New Jersey.

The last year or so has been the height of my Grateful Dead listening…They were the cutting edge of live rock music, wrote countless great tunes, were prolifically documented, and formed their own sub-culture along the way. The fact that in 2019 you can experience your favorite songs in so many different ways means there is always more to dig in to. With the Dead you can always come back to stuff you like or push forward to hear new moments…One version the harmonies will make you say wow, another the harmonies won’t be good at all but there will be a solo that is a cut above. New moments jumping out in something that is at the same time so familiar is a very rare thing in rock music.

Casey Rae, 44, is the host of the “Dead To Me” Podcast and director of music licensing at SiriusXM Radio.

The Grateful Dead originally emerged in a time of tremendous tension in American society—the Vietnam War and Watergate era. With America currently facing a crisis of identity, it makes sense that the Dead’s influence is once again ascendant. On one level, the Dead serve as a kind of salve, with good vibes and a sense of community that might otherwise seem elusive. But they also have something to teach us about the American experience, warts and all. The Grateful Dead’s music incorporates a broad range of musical traditions that give us a sense of continuity, especially for younger generations. The band’s ethos balances individual liberty with collective responsibility. And it seems that America needs that mediating influence now more than ever.”

Greg Ormont, 30, is the guitarist and singer for Pigeons Playing Ping Pong.

The Grateful Dead continues to influence us and the entire jam scene not only because of their great songwriting and incredible infectious lyrics but also because they taught us to jam with reckless abandon and let the energy of the crowd dictate the flow of the show. They taught us to let the energy of the crowd lead the concert.

Avery Kleinman, 27, is a producer on 1A (and she co-produced this segment).

The Grateful Dead offer me an entryway into the music of the past and the music of the future. I love comparing the oftentimes dozens of versions of Grateful Dead songs on Spotify to find my favorite. Listening to those old recordings feels like I’m traveling to a different era…but the Grateful Dead are also about the music of right now. It’s not just because I can still see most of the original members live. It’s also about the entire music scene that the Grateful Dead gave birth to. There are so many jam bands- ones formed in the 90s and ones formed this year- that cite the Dead as their inspiration. When I go to see a jam band, it’s very, very common to hear them play a cover of a Dead song. They’re honoring the musicians who came before them, but they’re giving the music their own twist. These shows are always filled with a diverse mix of people. Of all the live music I see, jam bands are most likely to have other young fans like myself, but also fans in their 60s and up. I am grateful for the Dead, and grateful to be “on the bus.

Staci Smith, 45, is the host of the “Strangers Stopping Strangers” podcast.

After seeing Dead & Company in 2015 I felt like I was home again – amongst the Deadheads & listening to the soundtrack of my life. After starting the podcast in May 2016, I have met so many people of all generations. There’s a whole new crop of “21st Century Deadheads.” Why the resurgence? In my opinion, some of the 21st Century Deadheads are kids who grew up with the music from their parents, but many are attracted for the same reasons my (and the generations before me) were. They want to go out for adventure (touring) and find a community that is accepting of people who don’t always fit into social norms (“the land of misfit toys”). They are inspired by the lyrics that transcend 50+ years that guide you through life’s ups and downs.

Dan Horne, 41, is the bassist for Grateful Shred

It all re-started with GD50 [Grateful Dead’s 50th Anniversary concert, Fare Thee Well]. Getting the original band back together and adding Trey [Anastasio, frontman of the jam band Phish] in there to create a really special moment. I think people just remember that the experience of going to shows is an essential part of life! The Grateful Dead are a vocal group first, with songs that move the band in directions that allow for the magical jams to happen. Can’t go to those next level jams without the songs. I became a fan through playing and learning the songs with my musician friends. The Grateful Dead catalog is a place where Rock n Roll musicians can all meet, not unlike the standards of jazz music.

Clay Finch, 25, is the guitarist and vocalist for Grateful Shred

The Grateful Dead have qualities that will always resonate with people, it’s human, soulful and free. It’s jazz and bluegrass and honky tonk and blues and R&B. I saw the Woodstock movie in 7th grade and it totally changed my life. I looked up all the bands that played. I heard “New Potato Caboose” and it was beautiful and vulnerable and very psychedelic.

Produced by Avery Kleinman & Jake Rutter

This content was originally published here.