#Because of the shade theme that plays I believe it was intended to be for Hollow. But I also believe the room didn't actually exist

[littlebittyhollowbugs]

Love how the white palace perfectly combines elements of both PK and WL.

The gleaming pale coloring, intricate defensive mechanics, advanced/magic technology, and architecture depicting the king alongside the elegant plant life bursting through the halls, flowery vines and roots framing the floors and the ceilings.

The wings moulds! I hc, that they were constructed to look like the moss flies that live in queens garden. The white lady is fond of the creatures, so the king chose that design specifically for her.

And, The nursery room! One of the most abounding in plant life rooms in the palace, and with the white lady's silhouette etched into the chair beside the cradle..

[dingodad]

if blood/caste = troll gender, then what would that make karkat? off the top of my dome, it immediately reads to me that he would be considered intersex or trans, both even, and at a glance, narratively that feels cohesive. i dont have anything to counter this reading, just curious on your thoughts!!

generally speaking i find it kind of a waste of time to try to identify "exact equivalents" in any given fictional allegory. blood castes are very much like troll genders and i think that's the most pertinent interpretation to homestuck's core themes, but the benefit of inventing a fictional system rather than straight up saying the trolls are segregated on the basis of sex is that the analogy doesn't have to be perfect and it can be used to represent different things at different times - the hemospectrum being a gender spectrum isn't mutually exclusive with the fact that it is also an economic hierarchy, for instance. a lot of discussions about "coding" in fiction end up languishing in the shallows by ignoring this.

so in terms of what the hemospectrum "makes karkat" i don't really think of it in terms of the exact thing that he would be on earth, bc i think the story adequately communicates the broad strokes; that whatever he is, in society's eyes he believes the circumstances of his birth cause him to fall short of the expectations that come with the strict categories alternia expects all trolls to fit into. i have to assume a lot of readers picking up on this is what led to trans guy karkat being such a hugely popular headcanon (besides trans guy headcanons having simply been the most popular thing full stop for a long time), which i think makes complete sense. i also think there are clear lines to be drawn between blood colour and biological sex in the way that biology never cleanly lines up with the social expectations associated with it, and even if i'm not totally sure terminology like "intersex" applies in the same way in a culture with 10+ genders as it does in a culture with just 2, the fact that trolls have a linear "spectrum" of genders clearly lends itself to this kind of thinking.

(this kind of harkens back to a years-old homestuck discourse: a lot of readers took issue with the suggestion that, despite being called a spectrum, in spinoff stories the troll blood colours are always depicted as fitting into twelve discrete categories. but long before i even began to explore the direct intersections between gender, sex and blood colour, the logic behind this seemed clear to me: surely all trolls ARE different and DO have subtly different shades to their blood, but in order to maintain a caste system where each blood colour has its place in the social order, alternian society has to act like there are only 12 colours. this is, after all, exactly how astrological signs are assigned; you can be born on any of 365 days in a year, but for the sake of neatly dividing the population into easily-described groups, each of these days is split among 12 basically-arbitrary signs. this clear parallel homestuck draws between gender and star sign is also why i find it so hard to take class and aspect seriously.)

so even if i don't think either of your options are necessarily what karkat's character is "intended" to convey in the same way i believe caste-as-gender as an intended reading, the versatility of the caste analogy makes them both very organic interpretations. BUT TO ACTUALLY GET TO YOUR QUESTION LOL: like i said in a previous ask, karkat comes across to me as being closeted. in conjunction with his chronically unorthodox approach to troll romance and the role he plays as homestuck's introduction to LGBT themes long before "trolls are bisexual" establishes itself as a canon fact, karkat reads as "the troll version" of a gay guy hiding this fundamental "flaw" in his being because he feels it's standing between him and the all-american ultra-masculine role he sees for himself among the threshecutioners. so like i said above i don't think it necessarily has to be about his "gender" so much as it is about his relationship to expectations of gender, just as troll-caste genders exist across a whole spectrum of expectations rather than in a strict binary.

[juvederm]

raving about trans josh . suck my nuts

i honestly don't see a lot for trans josh in art or writing. and i kinda feel like nobody sees a more feminine look or energy for him which is kind of lame. there's nothing that suggests he wouldn't like feminine things, and maybe it's his brazen dialogue that leads people to believe he's like any other dude who strictly presents masculine. which i mean, yes in the game he's never wearing anything that isn't, much like the rest of the guys.

i bring up femininity and masculinity because of how they are depicted in his concept masks. i have a feeling that people might think i "feminize" josh for no reason but the truth is that i got this idea from his concept mask artwork.

sad girl, sheila. sad girl especially is my favorite. and whatever this could just be me running on high levels of copium, but after already headcanoning josh as trans and then seeing these, i cherished this headcanon even more.

i can honestly see josh as transfem or transmasc, he's trans either way to me. i often think about him hiding his true forms of expression in favor of appealing to others, doing it for your own safety, etc, something i think trans people like myself can relate to.

some masks have themes related to motherhood as well.

and listen. i know sometimes horror plays into the themes of femininity within serial killers in horror media (like some being into crossdressing for example), but like i said. when thinking about josh being TRANS and seeing this, it fuels my belief for it more than ever. especially since it's in a Horror game as well.

like obviously this wasn't intended to be in the game as trans coding, it was inevitable for me personally to not let my favorite character get away with being cisgender LMFAO i had to stomp that out, it's just something i do, i think other trans people in fandom can relate to projecting that onto their faves.

and i know the until dawn fandom is fond of trans chris as it's literally the only trans headcanon i ever see no shade. and i like that one! truthfully, i do. sometimes i'm at odds with the way it's characterized in fics and whatnot, but it's a wholesome and harmless headcanon. i just wish i saw more for trans josh :-(

a lot of this headcanon requires brainstorming i think, you're not gonna use a lot of like. in game proof (besides the concept art) to try and justify it bc you literally don't need to for any lgbt headcanon honestly. esp in a heteronormative game like until dawn. like i know there's no way in Hell that SMG intended for josh to be trans, but it's my favorite headcanon ever and the only headcanon i've ever made a whole TIMELINE for because it speaks to me so much.

i also wanna bring up body horror and transformation. this also has to do with trans hannah. this, iirc, was kind of around back in the days of the fandom, but it's truly one of the best. i don't know if anyone at the time considered it. but i took hannah's transformation (and by proxy, josh's too) as trans coding as well, ofc it wasn't intended that way, i just think it makes things more interesting.

the idea of your body changing and you can't stop it sounds a lot like puberty to me and how it felt when i was going through it. sometimes horror movies even indulge in this idea, leading a lot of people to believe it as a metaphor for growing up trans (i've watched a lot of video essays mentioning this concept) and i wasn't gonna let josh or hannah off that easy. you are both TRANSGENDER.

of course this is all just projecting, but i just want these hcs to get some more love. also feminine josh, come on guys, can you really not see it for him? bc i can. maybe not as something he does Outwardly with confidence, but still, i don't see josh as him being strictly masculine, although i still love that look for him. not saying i don't.

thanks for coming to my ted talk.

+ some more masks. i love the doll related ones because i associate josh and hannah with dolls. like a lot.

[ravencincaide]

 Make it up to you

Summary: Chuuya fucked up. You knew it. He knew it. The question was could you recover from it? Or the time you put Chuuya between a rock and a hard place. 

Pairing: fem!reader x Chuuya 

Inspired by Sweetober prompt 10: Shining shoes

Warnings: Cursing, mention of clubwear/revealing clothes and alcohol,  

Authornote: 

Dogeza - A deepest (and often most humiliating) form of Japanese apology often targeted towards one's superiors or when requesting a favor. As Wikipedia states “By performing dogeza and apologizing to someone, usually the other person would have a tendency to forgive.” More on it here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dogeza

This fic follows a theme where the reader does not know Chuuya is in the Mafia.  I hope you enjoy ~ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You looked good. 

The clothes you picked out hugged your figure in all the right places. The black with golden glitter corset accentuating your figure giving you a smooth hourglass shape. It pushed your breasts up, giving them a perky appearance. The top black shimmery lace gave your girls just the right amount of modesty to not take away the teasing preview, especially since you weren’t wearing a bra. The design of the corset made it natural to look down, following the curve of your hips down your asymmetrical skirt; layers of sheer golden glitter between the folds of black lace. It was especially pleasing around your ass adding just the right amount of tempting volume before the long back piece of it stretched over your legs and down to your black and gold heels. The front of the skirt was shorter and simpler.  Just long enough that it wasn’t revealing too much while still showing off plenty of leg. You chose to forgo tights. There was no point in being modest, you were going clubbing after all. 

Twirling to the loudly playing pop song from your phone you took one more look at yourself. You had curled your hair, the bouncy locks circling over your shoulders and down to your waist and did your nails in matching colours. You were fully intending to show them off, picking a black clutch to match your attire. The perfume you picked was a sweet and playful scent- one you hadn’t worn in years because it just didn’t feel right to your ‘in relationship’ self. Now that you were single and it suited you perfectly. There was no question about it:  You looked fucking hot. 

All that was left were some last touches of make up before you were ready to head out and start pre-gaming. There was a cheap bar just around the corner from your house where you agreed to meet up with your girls- a pack of single ladies ready to get over their trashy boyfriends. 

Ding dong 

Speaking of your pack, your lips pulled up into a pleased smile as you finished applying your mascara before tossing it in the bag together with the rest of your make up. Another doorbell rang making you roll your eyes “ Sheesh I’m coming, I’m coming, no need to get your panties in a twist” You called, unable to believe how impatient your girlfriends were. 

Opening the door you were greeted with a bouquet of hundreds of dark red roses in slightly different shades which rather discreetly spelled out the word “ I love you”. They were held by a gloved hand, which was attached towards a very restless looking, top-hat wearing Chuuya. “ Sweetheart I-” 

Without a second thought you slammed the door in his face and turned on your heel, heading back into your bathroom.  You made a quick pause in the living room, changing the music from pop to club music. You also made sure to increase the volume, which almost drowned out the sound of banging and “oj are you fucking  serious right now?” coming from behind your front door. 

Where were you? 

Eyes done. Mascara done. Lips outlined and coloured with lipstick. Only some lipgloss and you’d be ready to go. You took your time to look through your makeup pouch, hesitating between a plumping gloss and a shimmering one. Would you look too much like a magpie with even more glitter and gold on your body? 

The sound of the doorbell in combination with hits- from both feet and fist- broke your concentration. Your Indecisiveness won out and you threw both tubes into your clutch. You’d apply the gloss in the bar you decided. 

Another prolonged ring of the doorbell.

You closed your eyes, inhaling deep breaths to keep the hot rod of anger in your stomach at bay. With each ring the anger grew, mixing with other unpleasant emotions such as ‘humiliation’ and ‘hurt’. 

Another kick towards the door. 

You swore you could hear the wood shaking- cracking- in the frame. Finally losing your cool you made quick feet back towards the front door, ripping it opened just as Chuuya was about to call out to you again

“ Sweetheart I-” 

“ What the fuck do you want?” you yelled at him. 

Chuuya flinched, anger flashing in his blue orbs before he bowed his head hiding his emotion beneath the shade of the hat. Once more he cautiously held the flowers towards you. Urging you to take them. You crossed your arms over your chest, your nails digging into your forearms. A side of you wanted to slam the door back in his face. While another side of you wanted closure- an explanation, a simple reason why.  

“ I’m so sorry sweetheart” he bowed his head lower as a sign of sincerity in his apology “ I fucked up.” 

“ Damn right.” You snapped back, his apology felt like a hot knife in your chest. It was doing little to sooth you. “ Is that all you wanted?” 

He didn’t raise his head. Like a scolded kid he kept looking at the floor “ I wanna make it up to you.” 

You scuffed at that and shook your head. “ Who the hell do you take me for? I have some self respect! You think you can humiliate me- stand me up, on valentine's day of all days! Ignore my calls and messages. Just ghost me for a month and then stroll up to my door with flowers and all is forgiven and forgotten. Fuck. You!”  

You stared at him for thirty seconds, waiting for him to say anything. To give you a reason, an explanation. Something that would make you understand. That would somehow justify all the suffering you had to put up with during this past month. All this time- and without  a single word from him. Nada. You had grown so desperate after a few days, so fucking worried that you had send a text to Dazai asking him if he knew anything. Not even an hour later he responded with a picture.

The picture showed Chuuya’s reflection in a mirror: mouth wide open with two protruding vampire fangs. Gloves off, poking at them. In the background was a plastic bag from a large and well known halloween and party store, a glass of wine and a lit cigarette peeking out atop a bedside drawer. In the picture, on the opposite side from the bedside drawer, you caught the glimpse of the bed, dark covers and silky sheets. 

Your cynical mind guessed- although you couldn’t prove it- that it was a one bed bedroom. But what you could say with certainty that it was a hotel room. And that was how you found out you were dumped.  And now he wanted to make it up to you? Just when you were starting to pick the pieces back up? Fuck him twice! 

You watched Chuuya take a breath, his voice shaky, a broken plea as he apologized again: “ I’m sorry. I really really am Y/N” 

Your response was slamming the door back in his face. 

Then you leaned your back against it. Your attention was on the ceiling, blinking fast to prevent the tears from falling. If you started crying now you’d ruin your makeup that you spend the last hour perfecting. He was not worth that. He wasn’t– but why did he have to come back now? Just.. why? 

You didn’t hear ringing or banging anymore and heaved sighed. You didn’t know if you were relieved that he left or whether you were sad that it took so little for him to disappear again. Was there perhaps a hint of anger that he treasured you so little? Why did he even bother coming back? 

 You stayed in the apartment until your phone buzzed with a text message. Night out with friends. Right.You went over to your phone and turned off the music, then picked up your clutch and a few other necessities on the way before you put on your heels. Then you opened the front door, freezing in your doorway. Chuuya was leaning against the wall opposite your door. Arms crossed over his chest, the ridiculous bouquet of flowers now laying on the floor. 

You felt a little bit of pity for them- after all the roses haven’t done anything wrong. “ Sweetheart I’m not leaving until we talk, even if I have to follow you to your outing” Chuuya stated keeping his eyes respectfully on your face “ Just give me a bit of your time. You have every right to send me to hell after and I promise I’ll never approach you again.” You looked at him and he stared back. Battle of the wills. Who’d break first? 

You knew Chuuya was persistent. You had no doubt in your mind that he would follow you around, all night if he had to, until you gave him your time. You doubted he would intervene no matter what you did, but you also did not feel comfortable drinking and dancing all night if he was going to sit in the corner and watch you. Let alone complain and critique his actions with your girlfriends if he was just gonna sit behind your shoulder and listen in. 

In defeat you sighed heavily and opened the door wider before turning on your heel and going back inside. Out of the corner of your eye you could see him take a step towards you and you paused in the doorway. The bouquet of flowers on the floor tugged once more at your heart. You didn’t think those beautiful roses deserved to be discarded like trash in the hallway, to be stomped on by passers. Walked on until there was nothing left of them. 

“ Take the flowers with; they did nothing wrong.” You took out your phone and began texting your friends while attempting to kick your heels off in the hallway. After a few moments of struggle your heels were off your feet and you headed back into your living room. You heard Chuuya taking off his shoes behind you. You didn’t bother to wait for him. You finished your text before you tossed your phone and clutch onto the couch.There you stopped and turned to face him, crossing your arms over your chest again. 

Chuuya wore a tired expression on his face: his eyes were slightly red, irritated and you could see black rings under them from lack of sleep. His clothes looked ruffled and far from pristine: crickled and definitely not the first freshness. You could see that his hair was messy, even if most of it was hidden beneath his hat. Despite your anger, the sight of him so tired and pale tugged at your heart. You watched with less anger as he set the flowers carefully on the table as if they would somehow defuse the tense situation. Your eyes lingered on them, not wanting to let go of your anger and hurt quite yet.

“I’m very sorry Y/N” You glanced back at him, your jaw dropping as you saw the proudest man you’ve ever known on his knees bowing his apology. It was not quite a dogeza but considering this was Chuuya of all people this was the closest possible to achieve from him.

The equivalent of a miracle. 

“ I am deeply sorry Y/N. I didn’t leave because I wanted to. Something happened at work that demanded my attention urgently and I had to leave Yokohama within half an hour. I got back today” he explained, his hands in fists at his sides his knuckles brushing against the carpet of your living room. Each word was spoken through squeezed teeth; he was  biting through this humiliating act for a chance at forgiveness.   “So you’re telling me that you stood me up because of work?“ You asked slowly, eyes narrowed in anger. You took a step closer to him. “And you didn’t have the decency to give me a call?” Chuuya sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose, trying to rub away the guilt and regret. “ I didn’t take my phone with me,” he admitted. The action made you raise an eyebrow,baffled. Then you laughed in disbelief. Another step towards him as if you could intimidate him into telling the truth “ You? Did not take your phone with you?” Chuuya nodded slowly, not finding any amusement in the current situation. “ I didn’t.. If I had it with me I’d be more focused on you and us.. Instead of work, sweetheart…I didn’t think a phone call or sms would solve this. I broke my promise to you. A text would not be able to solve that.”

You chewed on your lip in thought, your anxiety pooling in your stomach. Unconsciousely you inched closer to him. Despite your anger towards him, you missed him so fucking much“ You know, I can’t tell if you’re lying or telling the truth when I don’t even know where you work?”  

“ Sweetheart please–” Chuuya reached up and wrapped his arms around your waist. He buried his face in your stomach. He took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. Then another deep breath and another.  

" Seriously, You'd rather humiliate yourself on your knees than tell me where you work?" Your hand reached out and took off his hat, while your second hand began running through the tangled strands of orange hair. Your favorite hair. 

Chuuya did not hesitate to answer your question:" If it keeps you safe, then yes."

" Is it that important that I don't know? Kinda like you'd have to kill me if I found out" You half joked before you moved to sit on the floor right in front of him. Eye to eye, his hands still on your waist. 

Chuuya fixed you with a firm gaze, his blue orbs serious and worried. Not finding even the slightest bit of humour in your joke. “ I would never kill you, sweetheart. '' His gloved hand reached up and tugged the escaped baby hairs behind your ear and out of your face. “ But the more you know the more that could place you in danger–” he trailed off. His gloved hand trailing from your ear and to your cheek slowly stroking your skin. “Babydoll please” 

You surrendered and leaned into his touch. How could you ever say no to this man? To this proud, arrogant yet sweet man who’d gift you the world if you asked for it. You closed your eyes for a second, breathing in the familiar scent. The tension left your shoulders slowly. Anger fading into sadness, humiliation and tiredness, You just wanted to understand. 

Instantly he moves closer and presses his lips to yours. His lips felt chapped and raw, uneven and he tastes of coffee and cigarettes. But also of Chuuya. Your Chuuya. The second kiss was deeper, and you can taste a hint of your cherry flavored lipstick on his tongue. The kiss was hungry- you’re hungry for him, for his touch and taste after a month apart. And he was clinging to you as if you were his everything. 

When you finally ran out of breath you broke the kiss and rested your forehead against his. Your eyes staring into his; seeing all the emotions that were too hard for him to say out loud. " You hurt me very much, you know that. Can you promise me you won't do it again?"

Taking your hand in his own he nuzzled his face into the palm, his lips brushing your wrist every few moments. At your question he sighed. It looked like a part of him died with the answer " No, I can’t promise that” you move to pull away. 

Chuuya’s hold on you tightened, not letting you go, He continued speaking: " But I can promise I'll not leave you alone ever again" His lips were back on your skin, now more boldly kissing your wrist. 

You sighed tired and defeated, weak to those blue eyes of his and devilish kisses. " I guess that's good enough for now" 

Chuuya nodded slowly, a hint of a grateful smile on his lips as he  moved closer to kiss you again. But you stop him with a finger on his lips:" Say Chuu, did your hotel room have one bed?" He looked up at you with a confused and mildly annoyed expression on his face, gears shifting in his head as he tried to figure out what you were getting at. When he didn't reply you continued " were there girls?"

Chuuya gave you the most unimpressed and deadpanned look he could master " I didn't cheat"

You hummed for a moment, beginning to thread your fingers through his ponytail, detangling the knots as his lips pressed kisses to your skin. Suddenly you paused, gears clicking in your head as you realized he avoided answering the actual question : "Chuuya!..."

[reel-fear]

🦴 Nightalon 👀?

OH GOSH,,, welp here we go down the rabbit hole bc Nightalon is actually one of the oldest ocs I have!

How old? Well here was their original design when they were a tfp/YB character who was a Megatron Soundwave baby, purely bc I liked their designs. This design? Is over 3+ years old.

They were actually Just based off their name at first, I liked the name and thought it'd make a cool oc, in this first iteration their character was basically big goof who had an incident where their nodes were fried so hard they never felt pain, but were NOT indestructable. So they would walk into the con base bleeding from the arc and with no idea what was going on.

After that they became a StarSound baby I believe? Though I still barely touched their character. However when it came to figuring giving Radio a girlfriend in TFA I realized that I hadn't touched Nightalon in forever and found an interesting alt mode for them to take and hey I liked Lugwing so why not make them a lugwing baby... thing is this nightalon changed designs but not much in terms of personality.

OOF, yea but hopefully now you can start to see the basis of the modern Nightalon I settled on. I loved the idea of the triangle pattern suggesting stars without being too direct about it. I liked the general concept too but it needed working. So another design came along

So a while after designing that, I had watched a ton of video essays going over crappy romance media, from fifty shades of grey to the kissing booth to other ones, I started really wanting to explore more of the idea of how those kind of stories can warp the minds of young teenagers and lead to more unhealthy ideas of romance and dedication for them.... Then? I grabbed Nightalon and realized I could do something with this... I also really wanted to explore some more themes surrounding being trans n such and that all combined made for a much more interesting version of Night... One that was also HEAVILY based off Rebecca from Crazy Ex Girlfriend.

That leads us to modern Nightalon! With a backstory that faces struggles with her peers and a resentment towards her family. She threw herself into the very media and fiction I just mentioned.

If you've read Just A Girl In Love [If you look up the song lyrics, you'll see why I chose that song to be the title of her debut fic, its just too fitting-] you'll knew where this headed, she sees Radio, falls in love and while I really want to elaborate more on this in the form of another fanfic from her perspective I might as well spell out more of the subtle parts of that fic.

Nightalon is entranced in the idea of finding someone who she percieves as "Broken" and "Fixing" them, but the fiction she consumes has not given her any healthy ideas on how to do that. As her and Radio grow closer, Nightalon feeds into Radio's worst traits, she wants Radio to embrace her emotional instability, because it plays into her fantasies. It's not malicious but it is unhealthy, Nightalon thinks that Radio is perfect, that she doesn't need to change but instead just needs to run away with her forever and embrace who she is. Night does not trust the adults around her to help Radio due to her own truama too, and therefore tells Radio not to as well. She's not intending to, but she's treating Radio, her relationship with her and the world generally as a big novel where she is the main character and has all the answers. Where her delicate female touch will cure Radio of her depression and her issues and the adults around them just need to catch up with that fact. She's stuck up, views most of her family as somewhat beneath her due to their brutish and dumb nature, and sees herself as the protagonist with all the right ideas.

But reality will hit her hard and what will she do when it does? She didn't mean to hurt anyone, so does she double down on her innocence, or come to terms with having hurt the delicate rose no, the Person she loved more than anything in the world?

[seulgiology]

nobody better | lee jeno

pairings: college student!jeno x college student!y/n

words: 3322

genre: fluff, slight angst

synopsis: jeno's always there for you, and you never even ask him; it's just his nature. especially since he's hopelessly in love with you

warnings: cursing, drinking, slight innuendos but nothing crazy

a/n: yer, admin 1 here :P i been feeling real fluffy lately. here's the first post of the year :D. nothing else to say, please enjoy this, and feedback is accepted ofc

disclaimer: This is a work of fiction from our imagination. It is not intended that the plot, theme, original characters, idols, etc. portray any real-life events/people. Plagiarism is NOT tolerated on this blog. If you believe we have copied an existing authors’ work, please message us privately. thank you and enjoy :)

-

You couldn't ask for anybody better. He had to know he was better too, inside and out.

The way he slid you your favorite hot tea, lemon zinger with honey to be specific, whenever it was a late-night and your eyes hurt from staring at your laptop, it made your heart ache from those sweet gestures. He'd press his lips to your temple and whisper little phrases of encouragement. He didn't even know the tight hold he had on your heart- and damn did it hurt so good when did things like that.

"You got this y/n, it's only a couple more pages left." Of course, you didn't want to finish your research paper for your philosophy class. You were burnt out from bulky projects and trying to stay attentive in other classes. Jeno could see it, couldn’t miss it.

Sometimes he'd be in your dorm in the early morning, already prepared himself at his own apartment (lucky bastard). He looked as attractive as ever in that simply loose long sleeve white shirt that vaguely outlined his toned arms and abdomen. You preferred his presence more since you were desolate and your roommate practically lived in her boyfriend's single room. Once again, those lucky bastards.

Nowadays, he'd see your slightly sunken skin under your eyes, a deeper shade than typical. Your sclera was tinted red from the lack of sleep you were getting, and sometimes he swore you were consuming cannabis. Your body tended to slow, trudging back in your room after he hugged you a warm good morning. You genuinely lacked energy and you swore you were seeing colors at this point, the hues seemed to either be dialing up and down, scaring you when by yourself.

Yeah, your headaches were nothing to play around with either. It made it difficult to want to get up in the morning when you knew pain and discomfort were later to follow. However, it felt worse to lay there in pain knowing something could’ve been done.

So back in your little desk space in your dorm room, when you were slowly sliding off your hand because you were falling asleep reading over the last page you wrote, he hoped the sweet aroma of the tea woke your senses. You just hummed in response to his words, your heart swelling a little more with love for him when you felt him slide one of his hands in yours, interlocking your fingers and squeezing it for extra reassurance.

You loved him so damn much.

"I'll buy you those chocolate-covered strawberries from that shop down on Jonesview Ave if you turn it in on time," is what his final words were as he walked away that made you get a B+ on that paper, to say the least.

And when he came knocking on your door later that week at around 10 p.m. because he knew you just came from your "mandatory" boba break on Thursdays, you were pleasantly surprised to see two sheet masks in his hands and a cheeky smile on his face.

"If you think this is an attack it is. I already know you haven't been following your nightly routine," is what he'd say before you could question him. Now don't get him wrong (ever), you still had the face of a girl he couldn't help but stare at, but he didn't want you obsessing over the acne that was going to make a not-so-subtle entrance on your face if you gave up now.

"So," you drawled out softly as you tried not to smile in fulfillment from his tender hands smoothing out the cold and wet sheet on your face. Your legs were a little frigid from the shorts you wore as you sat on the toilet seat, him hovering close in front of you. He tapped your cheek to remind you that facial movement would ruin the placement of the mask. He already finished his, and it was an amusing sight to see his hair in a sprout-like ponytail with your orange scrunchie to keep it together.

"How long do we keep this on?" You questioned cautiously. His face blanked as he tried to remember, but he naively threw the packages away without reading the directions first.

"Uh- that’s a great question, but did you know that this mask actually is supposed to help with hydrating the skin?" He sputtered out to cover his lack of incentive to answer, knowing how to distract you. You had a thing for product benefits and you fell for it every time. So he went on a tangent about the masks potato extract and what the hyaluronic acid would provide for your pores and blemishes.

He was honestly bullshitting and going off of what one of his latest friends, Sungchan, would say. You would enjoy his company.

You couldn't see his eyes become crescent moons when you poached him for more information and he answered with just as much interest. Jeno sat on the bathroom mat in front of the shower and looked up at you with his undivided attention as you waved your hands and widened your eyes in animation. White sheet mask and all. You beamed under that small bathroom dingy fluorescent lights that night.

It was a feeling he didn't know how to describe, let alone acknowledge. A feeling that made him a little dizzy just being in your vicinity. It washed over as if it ran through his nervous system, and he welcomed it every single time.

He loved you so fucking much.

"Shh, stop fussing, Lee. I'm just fixing his mess you call a bedroom," You interrupted his complaining. It truly was a very hypocritical statement from you, considering your room looked like it had its own demons to deal with. He insisted you come over, your place was very depressing and a change of environment might help you get out of your slump to see your active personality again.

It was the perfect size apartment, and the furnishing complimented him well- masculine, mature, and stylish.

You crawled in his memory foamed bed after straightening his space out and instantly regretted laying down on the cloud-like duvet. You needed to sleep, but how could you. There was work that always needed to be done and how were you going to even start them?

The bed dipped beside you, and nothing could wipe that worrying look of the inner turmoil of your pretty features. He had two steaming mugs in hand, whipped cream perfectly swirled. But you looked up at him, a sudden rush of panic beginning to settle in. Something wasn't right when your chest began hurting from your heart pounding and your mouth went dry.

"Hey, you know what, I think I need to head back now that I think about it, there's tons of stuff I need to catch up on," You hurried your speech since your voice was becoming thick with emotion, stumbling over some words. He could read you like a book and knew the last thing you needed was to be alone. He was quick and careful in setting the mugs on the nightstand, brows furrowed as he did his best in comfortably pulling you against him, your body physically quivering now.

"You don't need to leave, y/n," his usual silvery yet husky voice was traded out for a more urging and softer one. His back was leaning against the headboard as he held you safely in between his legs, your form curled against him, seeking security and comfort. You hiccuped into the crook of his neck, holding back tears you simply can't let him see. That stupid lump in your throat was making it hard to breathe properly.

And he let you cry. He let your tears saturate his shirt when you reached to wrap your arms around his neck to seek more of his warmth. It was not a pleasant surprise to see you lose the last bit of control you were maintaining this entire week come crumbling down with the unconditional amount of kindness and care he was showing you.

It was just so, so hard. Being a responsible young adult, while also trying to live life to the fullest. Trying to turn your assignments in on time and have them be of acceptable quality. Worrying about the future, trying to stay level in the fast pace of it all. Needless to say, you were overwhelmed. Nights of avoiding and putting off things till later, or cramming every assignment possible into one sitting.

At times like this where you realized you did have someone in your corner; always there to cheer you on, to show you in every way they can the love that they have for you. You appreciated the fact that he didn't question you as you shuddered against him, the untrollable faucet you called your eyes kept pouring and pouring.

He never loosened his hold around your waist, his other hand holding your nape. He whispered such sweet things to you, encouraging you to feel what you were in the moment. He was so good to you. It felt like an eternity being this close, this intimate.

"I'm sorry," you croaked out after your sobbing subsided. He held you tighter against him and whispered that there was nothing you should ever be sorry about, especially when it came to him. God, you felt bad now. You felt undeserving of it all. But he kept coming back to you, checking on you, making sure you were still eating and taking care of yourself. He pulled you back, making sure you looked him in the eyes

"Listen to me okay, you shouldn't be stressing about these kinds of things. Professor Janes hasn't even graded the papers from the midterm yet, she's definitely not worried about next week's assignment being handed in." Jeno joked, his thumb caressing your cheek and tone light-hearted and mellow. It worked in getting you to scoff and tighten the nervous grip on the hem of his shirt.

"I'm serious, think about it- you're burying yourself into getting ahead of someone who isn't even trying to keep up." He stressed, and it did make sense. Your face dropped when you realized he was right. You were purposely burning yourself out and for what? To compete? Personal gain?

It was in that moment, your watery eyes gazed into inquisitive ones; that puppy dog look never gets old. You came to the conclusion; there was nobody like him. Call it whatever you want, but there was not a single man you'd let hold you at your lowest, tell you truths you were denying in your head, and be so amorous with overall.

And you looked at him, really did. It was cute when he frowned at how quiet you were and looked around the room to avoid that weird look you were giving him. That overwhelming feeling in your chest, it ruptured and spread until it was the only emotion consuming you, panic be damned. His slightly calloused hand could feel how flushed your cheek was getting, but you weren't crying anymore.

"I tried figuring that out on my own, to be honest with you, but I didn't want to realize I was doing this to myself," you concluded and he hummed in response. So you laid back on his chest, closing your eyes and taking in the surrealness of the situation. His fingers lightly glided over your scalp, lulling you to a lax and languid state when the stars plagued behind your eyelids.

"I wish you wouldn't work yourself so hard," was the last thing you heard him murmur before you went to sleep in his hold. And he was filled with unbridled joy knowing you were getting some shut-eye while being by your side.

The t.v. was the first thing you heard when you woke, an R&B artist you didn't recognize singing over slow beats. Your vision was fuzzy when you looked at two miserable mugs in the dim room. It took a few more seconds to realize you were laying comfortably on Jeno's bed, but the owner was nowhere to be found. You stretched and yawned in the most unpleasant way possible when your clothes began itching you the wrong way.

Picking your phone off the nightstand, you scrolled through your notifications and finally found one from Taeyong, Mark, Ten, Haechan, and the samoyed impersonator about 15 minutes ago. What a coincidence, it only happens once in a blue moon.

leader of the lee's: please tell me you have measuring tape and the will to live

lee #4: went to get some food, you know where my clother are, there's a clean towel in the closet tho. and if you steal my blankets, im putting my cold feet on you :/

morkus lee: Hey, sorry to bother you but it's very urgent. So like is it true that my forehead is like big cause hyuck said that he can play tic tac toe on it and ma ybe he's lying but like I tried and now I have...

lee #5: if you respond to markus i'll tell jeno you used to write smutty fanfic about Zayn Malik

lee #10: i ran out of white gouache, so i'm stealing yours, thx love u :3

You snorted to yourself and replied to everyone accordingly, Mark not included. You liked Jeno's message to signal you read and understood. He should be back any second so you got to work on draping his tee over your head and tying the drawstring around your waist from his larger pajama pants.

It smelled like his pleasant scent and it instantly felt like home. You washed your face with his products (they were the same as yours since you recommended them to him) and patted your skin dry.

In the midst of cocooning yourself on the large bed, Two Broke Girls playing on the screen, Jeno, sauntered in with a tied bag that smelled of fried chicken and fries. He apologized for taking so long, he somehow got lost on his way back.

It clinked with the familiar sound and the green hue of Soju bottles pressing against the transparent bag. Ah, your eyes glittered upon the liquor and good food just mere inches away.

"I know it's Sunday at," he proceeded to look at the time before continuing, "7:03 p.m., but you need this. So don't throw up on my floors." He's too good because you were a talking machine with a potty mouth when drunk.

You both sat on the floor with your backs against the side of the bed, the boxes of food empty, about 4 small-sized empty bottles split between the two of you (you drank a little too much) and the conversations shared were random and full of life.

Then, you were yapping his ear off about color theory and how it's a bunch of bullshit at around 9 at night.

"What's even the point? People love whatever shitty color combinations they can pull out of their ass anyways, so what's the goddamn point?" You shouted as your companion giggled at your incredulity, honestly not comprehending a word you were saying.

"Oh wait you have something on your face," he slurred his words, his dark grey hair moving along with his head as it tilted. He scooted closer and reached a shaky hand up to your lips. It was hot in the space, yet chills ran down to your fingertips. He licked his own lips looking at yours and peeked through his lashes into your widened stare. A hard thump, thump, thump, resounded in your ear as your heart couldn't keep up with the trepidation. Your body was attracted to his as you leaned forward, and it quite literally felt as though time slowed with every moment he was getting closer.

You yelped in surprise when he flicked your cheek instead.

"You piece of shit, why'd you do that? I thought you were going to kiss me or something! Stop laughing! What if I did that to you, huh? You'd be sitting there blue balls and all." He was rolled over wholeheartedly laughing at you, stuttering over his words trying to respond. He contained himself but almost lost it again after seeing your childish form frowning at him with the ugliest face you could muster.

A teasing grin took over his face when he motioned for you to come closer. With the alcohol in your system, you didn't have the incentive to hesitate to move in front of him place your palms on his muscular thighs to lean over in his flushed face, your knees planted on the floor. He was delighted to feel you shiver when he moved closer to your ear, hot breath fanning your neck.

"I wouldn't want our first kiss to happen when you wouldn't even remember it y/n." The sultry sweet voice made you feel a little more than love, it was something lustier. You clumsily leaned back from him, wheezing out a breath from the way his lips were barely parted and eyes were hooded. What did he just say?

But he was right too. He wasn't as intolerant as you when it came to alcohol, so his senses were there more than yours were absent. Just a little bolder than his typical observant self. And of course, you end up blacking out some time after.

You awoke once again, this time at 1:25 a.m. exactly upon looking at the laminating analog clock, the same two mugs on the nightstand.

We should really dump those out now.

When should I text Jiwoo about the presentation?

You couldn't but think about your assignments again now that it was technically Monday, a feeling kin to fear beginning to settle.

Your head didn't hurt (thank fucking god) but you were laying on top of a firm body. You wondered how you both ended up in the bed anyways. You instantly began feeling around to make sure that-

"We didn't do anything, don't worry," His raspy voice startled you into sitting up slightly. He was laying on his back, arm draped behind his head, the other around your shoulders shifted to your mid-back upon you sitting up. He was changed into clothes suitable for sleep, you obviously having no recollection of him doing that.

It wouldn't be a lie if you didn't think it was odd that you two always ended up staring at each other in a daze. A silent plead for permission neither of you could figure out. It was comical and so cliche; two people navigating college life very differently end up falling for each other without being able to grasp it completely. Jeno was flawless in the eyes of the beholder, and he always would be.

A lazy, "Okay," was your response, a neutral and calm mood taking over the atmosphere in its heed. You settled back into him and let the aroma of his moisturizer waft through your nostrils.

He loved being close to you, loved giving his love to you even more. Absentmindedly tracing stars, hearts, and even your name on your back with the tips of his fingers, it was enough. Hearts beating shamelessly against each other, he breathed out in content- this is where he could be forever.

You didn't fight your heavy lids drooped once more and you welcomed the sleep, welcomed it all. He pulled the blankets over your bodies and shifted so you were both on your side. And he allowed you to subconsciously tangle your legs with his, a sigh of gratification from it.

Neither of you would figure out what didn't separate you for the rest of the night. One would guess it was the uncanny want and need for each other. It wasn't awkward nor suffocating. Souls moved in sync with each other, matching the others for a lifetime.

It was pure, unrefined love.

[apixrl]

SINCERELY, YOURS.

hanta sero x fem!reader

WARNING(S): none

word count: 3.0k

song: sincerely, yours // nohidea

note(s): i just think that he'd be the perfect hubby tbh (EDIT: I'M SO DUMB I POSTED W/O TAGS PFAHAHHA)

Hanta finally managed to force open the door to the log cabin that had long been awaiting your arrival, the wooden structure welcoming the approaching warmth and laughter of the newly wedded couple. The ravenette smirked joyously and let out a triumphant 'hoorah', your laughter only adding to the display of ego on his face.

"And you said I'd drop you," Hanta mocked your earlier words, looking down at you with that very same smirk. If not for your arms wrapped around his neck and entire weight held in his arms, you most likely would have pushed his face away by the cheek. To avoid that shit-eating, joking smirk that rarely left his dumb and lovable face. The face you fell for so undoubtedly swift and heavy.

"I didn't say you would I said you may drop me," Was your response. "It's not every day we walk through so much snow!"

"Hush now, that was nothing to me," Hanta lifted the arm that supported your back, planting his lips on your forehead in a sweet welcoming kiss. Your lips curled in approval, accepting the gesture as Hanta used his foot to close the door behind you both, driving away the cold breeze from outside as warmth replaced it. "Now would you look at this place!"

Heeding Hanta's words, your eyes averted from his addicting gaze to the bonnie log cabin interior set out before you two. From left to right the cabin maintained an earthy theme, consistent in wooden textures excluding that of the supple beige sofas in the centre of the room. They were accompanied with ripening red cushions, as well as a few other pieces of furniture containing the same colour to maintain an advertising aesthetic no doubt. Lengthy beams stretched from one end of the walls to the other, set out in rows. The deepest wall (opposite to the entrance) was made mostly out of glass and onlooking a gorgeous snowy forest scene, small golden lights lit up outside to only add to the aura already presented. Built-up by red bricks and extending up toward the ceiling was a great open fireplace, already sparked alight and sensing a contrasting warmth to the bitter cold outdoors. In the corner of the room were a set of stairs most likely directing themselves off to the bedroom, though you and Hanta were so taken by the bottom floor's interior neither of you even processed there were more rooms to see.

"Wow... this place is gorgeous!" You said through a whisper, face lighting up at the sight. Never had you thought a place could be so beautifully arranged and so beautiful in general, and the two of you had this place to yourselves for an entire two weeks... it made you feel like the luckiest person alive! That you were really, as you'd just tied the knot the love of your life and were starting an entirely new journey with him. From the very moment you'd both uttered 'I do' in front of all your friends and family - the paths you lead became one that you would waltz down together.

"So you like it then?" Hanta asked, ebony eyes trailing away from the open fire and down to your own E/C irises. His smirk slowly transitioned to an endearing grin upon seeing your face of wonder, heart skipping a beat as your gaze met his and your expression mirrored.

"Of course! It's just how I imagined it - even more stunning than the pictures online," Your hand grazed Hanta's gloved one, though the barricade of wool and cotton did nothing to prevent the love and desire sent through the tips of your fingers. The ravenette admired your beauty in that lingering stare shared between you, exhaling a content sigh. You never failed to astound him with your beauty, the way your eyes glowed whenever you looked at him. How your hair fell perfectly into place no matter the circumstance (even on your worst of hair days you somehow managed to make it work). Not to mention your smile and laugh - those specific factors alone making Hanta fall for you over and over and exceeding limits of love and admiration he didn't even think he possessed.

Just before Hanta was to fall into daydream you shook him out his thoughts, the shifting of weight in his arms struck him to shake out of it, realising that you were attempting to shuffle out his arms in order to stand. So he let you down, grip loosening and reluctantly allowing you to step away.

"I'm glad," He quickly uttered, his hand lifting to his head to remove the woolly hat resting there. Then he proceeded to unbutton his winter coat as did you, the pair of you making light work of it due to the excitement of exploring your temporary home.

"So our suitcases are already here?" You asked Hanta, straightening out your knitted turtleneck jumper which was a soft pink shade. Usually something you wouldn't wear, but it was well-suited for the weather and didn't irritate your skin. So you took advantage of the purchase. From your left Hanta hummed softly, turning towards you once he was done hanging his coat on the rack. He too had a turtleneck on, but his donned a collect of abstract patterns and stuck to more neutral colours than yours.

"Yep, they should be upstairs," Hanta replied, running a hand through his hair as he looked over at you. He shifted over to your side, hugging you from behind with a mischievous chuckle. "But we can unpack tomorrow,"

"I like the idea of that, I just wanna snuggle," You responded with a giggle, leaning back into your husband's hold. After a few seconds Hanta stepped forwards, forcing your feet to follow suit. The ravenette guided you both to the nearest sofa, where he messily fell back against the ruby red cushions and you alongside him.

"That's because you procrastinate more than you've ever been willing to admit," Hanta turned you over so you sat atop his middle, hands settled on your hips like they were structured to hold them. There was a smirk on his face as you rolled your eyes at his last comment.

"I procrastinate because you distract me," You corrected, poking his chest with a prominent finger.

"Ah well, what can I say? I'm just that pretty aren't I?" He replied, laughing joyously. You couldn't help but echo with your own form of a chuckle, shaking your head as the smile on your face sent Hanta all kinds of elated emotions through his veins.

"You're not wrong there, Tiger," You grinned ear to ear, staring lovingly in his direction. Words weren't enough to express how much you loved him, your mind struggling to form sentences most of the time with just how much he took your breath away. In truth, you would have allowed yourself to remain gazing into Hanta's eyes the entire night. But you were due to catch sight of an envelope on the coffee table next to you both, drawing your attention away from him as fast as it came. The item too out of the ordinary to ignore. Peculiarly you leaned over to grab it, tilting your head at the item.

"What's that?"

"I don't know," Was your answer. Your fingers proceeded to slit open the top, discovering a smaller, folded piece of paper inside. Curiously you opened it up, voice filling the room as you discovered golden ink was printed on one side and intended to read it out.

" Dear Mr and Mrs Sero,

We are beyond pleased that you chose to stay with us for your honeymoon. Have a wonderful and splendid time at the start of your journey together and we wish you nothing but happiness and joy during your stay.

Kindest regards,

[resort/name] "

"Mr and Mrs Sero," Hanta repeated with a thoughtful stare to the wooden beams above. "I'm still not used to hearing that and we've already been married a week," A smile formed on his lips, releasing a chuckle from the depths of his chest. Almost like he couldn't believe the words he had just uttered. Tilting your head, you pondered on what he meant.

"How do you mean?" You didn't receive an answer straight away, the man you called your husband gently sighed, almost with the case of the lovesick. Somewhere during the exhale Hanta's eyes fell from the beamed ceiling and onto you, gratitude threaded in his expression as he stared at you.

"I just don't know how I got so lucky to marry someone like you," His hand extended to cup your cheek, cradling the slightly chilled part of your face (thanks to the cold air and wind from outside) as his thumb stroked the surface of your skin. Your eyes widened, all too used to the gesture but rarely ever prepared for it whenever Hanta committed to it. You smiled, nuzzling into his warm hold as your eyes closed.

"Me too," You hummed, sighing out yourself as your heart fluttered higher and higher with each passing second. A short silence ensued, ending as you abruptly let out a little laugh. It caught Hanta's attention, his head cosying into the cushion behind him as his brows raised.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing. I was just thinking about the night you proposed. That's all," Another laugh escaped, humour striking you as you recalled how it had played out. From the manner your lover rolled his eyes, he clearly still hadn't emotionally recovered from it.

"That stupid fire pit," He groaned, eyes closing in annoyance. "I can't believe I let it ruin the moment,"

"I don't think that was the fire's intention, Hants,"

Despite being blatantly confident and bold, when it came to more... intimacy-related things, Hanta Sero's expertise dwindled dangerously. It had taken him months of knowing you to actually ask you out on a date, and when you finally got together? Well, it took him four years before he began to think about popping the question - three months more to actually pop it. Whilst you did say yes once he got down on one knee on the balcony of your holiday home for your fourth anniversary together, the events that proceeded after were what truly traumatised the poor ravenette.

Your holiday was spent somewhere in the Caribbean at a beachside residence that locals rented out for tourists. You and Hanta had always been big on travelling, hence your honeymoon location being such an unconventional place. Or as far as you knew, you didn't have an exact number on how many honeymoons were spent in remote mountain ranges surrounded by blustering winds and snow. It was a nice change of pace to the intense heats nearer the Equator.

During that vacation in particular though, that was the year Hanta finally decided to propose. After a long day on the beach, swimming in the ocean and feeling the sand between your toes as evening approached, you watched the sunset on the balcony of the second floor, neighbouring your bedroom. To set the mood the firepit in the centre had been lit, creating a stunning orange glow in Hanta's eyes as he held you close to his chest.

You noticed he was quite fidgety in his seat, wondering what was wrong with your lover as he gripped his knee tight. Like he was uncomfortable or nervous. Like he needed to get something off of his chest. It was only when you pointed out your concern and his odd behaviour that Hanta managed to shift his stance. Moving from his stiff position to wobbling on one knee, then came the heartfelt speech that gave you a sense of where he was going. A subtle reach into his pocket and before you knew it, you were shouting yes into the night sky and your eyes foggy with tears of complete and utter joy.

Hanta placed the ring on your finger, the realisation hitting him at that moment that you and he were engaged. His excitement got the better of him, the male sweeping you in his arms and swinging you around as he babbled sweet nothings into your ear. The speed wavered his balance, his leg knocking into the table holding a bottle of wine he had ordered specifically for the occasion. Much to both of your bad luck, it all collapsed against the firepit and tipped it over - and one can only imagine what happened next. A rather chaotic ruckus erupted between you as Hanta grabbed you by the waist and flung you both out of the building via the balcony to ensure your safety. Then he 'thwipped' straight back up to the fire and frantically searched for the fire extinguisher to put it out, all whilst you sat on the sandy ground outside, frozen to how drastically the mood had changed.

Luckily the fire didn't spread too far. If not for Hanta's efficiency in dealing with it upfront, it could have spread to the bedroom and the rest of the house. It did not, however, the most damage being the balcony sofas that were scorched no thanks to their wooden frame and white cushioning.

Despite having just been engaged, there wasn't much you and Hanta could do to celebrate. So the night ended with you and he falling to slumber in the early hours of the morning, too exhausted after dealing with the owners' wrath after the slight mishap of nearly setting their building ablaze.

"At least you didn't burn the entire house down," You tried after a few seconds of quiet, earning a scoff on Hanta's part as he ran a hand through his hair.

"It felt like it when I called the owner's to tell them what happened," Hanta answered, softly frowning at the shrieking yells he heard during that call ringing their way through his mind again. Long after he'd shut them out based on the humiliation of being on the receiving end. You giggled, recalling how you were able to hear them despite the phone not being on speaker.

"I'm surprised they let us stay for the rest of the week,"

"That's because I paid the money for the damage caused within six hours of them demanding it," Hanta reminded you, dragging his hands down his face as he groaned out. Probably expelling his inner cringe at his foolishness that night. "Times like that make me relieved I'm a top ten pro, helps out with emergencies a great fucking deal,"

"Are you sure that didn't play any part in their generosity? That you're a top ten pro?"

"No way," He said and sat up to meet your height, hands looping to cradle the small of your back. He held back continuing to briefly peck you on the lips. "The bill they gave me was the complete opposite of generous,"

"How much was it again?" You asked, memory not serving you the answer. The ebony-haired male leaned forwards to kiss you again before he moved his lips up to your ear. His voice became a whisper, telling the sum in Yen which made your eyes widen in astonishment.

"Wow," Was your instinctive reply, Hanta scoffing a laugh in agreement based on your tone of surprise. It was there he nuzzled into your neck, inhaling through his nose to catch a whiff of your scent. The aroma acting as a sedative to wipe the memory from his mind permanently. All he wished to remember of that night was the way your face lit up as he asked you to take his hand in marriage. How your tears formed and how your lips uttered the words he had oh, so desperately wanted to hear after months and months of worry of being rejected.

And look at you both now; husband and wife and on your honeymoon. Holding each other as close as close can be with no doubt or hesitancy in your minds at all. Why he had worried so much was something he would never be able to figure out. As looking back, all of it felt like the easiest thing he had ever had to do.

Due to that, Hanta smiled into your neck. The change could have been missed, but you were far too attentive to not notice. The feeling of his cheeks shaping his smile made you smile as well, your arms wrapping around Hanta's neck in a desperate need to pull him closer. Your fingers ghosted the back of his neck, tickling the hairs that attached with care like no other. You rested your chin on his head, eyes closed gently in comfort. In response, Hanta hummed lowly, hands starting to rub up and down your back like he was giving you a massage.

Silence passed, the two of you simply enjoying the other's company and the intimate moment you had welded together. The proximity created a warmth that could fight any cold, the fireplace behind you both unneeded to fight the swirling snow outside. Your eyes peaked open as the faint crackle of the fire nearby caught your attention. You watched the flames dance for a second or so before you plucked up the confidence to speak.

"Just... let's not set fire to this place. Alright?" You mused, holding your breath as you waited for Hanta's response. Luckily he didn't dismiss it, actually finding the comment quite funny. He voiced a blurt of a laugh, head shaking as much as he could make it whilst it buried into the depths of your neck. Hanta's mouth opened to make his reply, quickly hushing up again to return to the peaceful silence of before, not at all ready to let it go just yet.

"Agreed,"

[sansmania]

its o VER WHY WAS THIS SO LONG? 

part 1 | part 2 | art that goes with the fic

Title: Your Man

Ship: Boss [ @bonelyheartsclub ]/ GN Reader

Descrip: take it im drifting out to sea because HES GONNA BE A COWBOY thE END

Willie had taken his time to take in the damage done to the beloved boots, tutting and frowning at the holes and shredded leather.

"Oh yeah, I can fix 'em for ya, but it'll take a few days, Mr. Boss. That lil' dog did a number to these." Boss exhaled through his nasal bone with a silent nod. It seems 'Toby' had also managed to dislodge some of the pins that held the heels in, which would mean the boots needed to be completely stripped and rebuilt from the sole up.

"That is fine, I suppose. They mean a great deal to me, so take the time you need to get them back to perfect condition." He seemed a bit emotional about leaving the boots behind, and you gently assured the skeleton that they were in skilled hands. Leaving his contact information, the two of you turned to leave. 

Until a bony hand grabbed your neckline again.

"You said this store specializes in leather and boots, correct?"

"Yes?" You held the word out longer than necessary, red pinpricks looking down at you, then to the fluorescent shoes between you.

"I would like to peruse them, then. It would not hurt for me to have a few more sets, anyway. And I am beyond done with these sneakers. I feel like one of those fictional circus clowns."

You bit your tongue at his presumption, knowing Boss wouldn't listen to a word you had to say on the subject, and accepted your fate in the tobacco and wood lacker scented hell.

After a bit of searching, pausing only to laugh at some of the ridiculous 'southern fact' signs they had decorating a shelf, the pair of you found the boot section of the large store.

"Human, I highly doubt if Texas were real, that it would home ninety percent of the planet's spider population." You couldn't help the snort that came out at Boss' comment as he walked over to the wall of shoes.

His eyelights were transfixed on the detailed stiches in some of the leather boots. His phalanges traced over a pair that had some gaudy gems placed into them- a pair that had studs- red stained leather- black snake skin. He was strangely silent as he looked over each set with wonder.

You didn't think any of them were Boss' style, to be honest. They were about classic as classic cowboy boots get- you could have sworn you even spotted a pair made of alligator skin.

"These." He finally spoke, pulling down one of the only sets that seemed to be ankle high. They were a deep maroon, black stitching along the sides and folds, and a very obvious steel toe embedded inside. There were a few gold embellishments and you felt they were gaudy as all hell.

But, that expression of wonder in Boss' eyes made him look like a child on gyftmas morning.

It was cute.

He was cute.

"I mean, sure, if you're into red, black and gold-" The skeleton flicked his eyes towards you, making your mouth snap shut. He took a seat on a nearby bench, listlessly kicking off the offending accessories to try the new boots on.

Boss became silent once again, taking in the shine of leather as he tilted his feet and legs to get a good look at them.

"There is a mirror over there." You mention, pointing a few feet away, and he stood up to admire the shape of the shoes. And while he did so, you also found yourself admiring him.

Boss was very tall- even without the help of his stiletto heels- and his broad shoulders squared in perfect posture made almost anything he wore look breathtaking. His choice of attire today fit snuggly against his ribcage, tapering down his spine- making Boss look, pun intended, skeleton thin. Tight, but soft, leather pants hugged his narrow hips and bony legs, perfectly shaping his body.

"Hmm. A bit lower than what I am used to, but they are quite fetching on me. What do you think, human?"

He caught you staring, once again, in the mirror- just as your eyes had been slowly trailing down his legs, brain becoming grey mush. You curse quietly, turning your head away with a mutter of agreement.

"Sadly, they do not match the rest of my attire. I should see if they have apparel here to compliment my figure and accessories." He made an amused sound when you cocked your head at the suggestion, cheeks burning with new fervor.

Oh. He knew exactly what he was doing now. Boss wouldn't even play with the idea if any of his family was around, but since it was just the two of you, he was going to continue his sadistic game.

When you had first met Boss, you would have sworn he didn't have a playful bone in his body- the serious tone and way he carried himself made it seem he was all work and no play. But, as you got to know him, his true colors seemed to blossom forth. Yes, he hated puns, that didn't mean he had no sense of humor. His humor was dry and a little cynical- and you had nearly soiled yourself in laughter when he cracked his first joke around you.

He also found Blue and Nox's rivalry amusing, egging them on at times just to get under their skin.

And when then two of you were alone, he was much more relaxed, allowing more of his jovial side to come out. Sometimes it was a welcome blessing and sometimes it was not.

As it was at your expense today, it was one of those times that his sense of humor didn't delight.

"Uh, s-sure. Why not? Let's find you a nice pair of chaps-" Boss' amused smile caught you off guard as he held a hand up to stop you from moving. You had hoped he would allow you to help, maybe in a way save yourself from this horrible fate.

"No, I believe I can handle dressing myself just fine. Though, I will listen to your opinion after I have chosen an outfit." The smirk didn't go away as you made a noise of disdain. The skeleton sauntered off on his own, leaving you to scream internally at being caught red handed and was going to make you suffer for it.

When he turned a corner, you were on your feet- tossing the old converse in your inventory- and did your best to sneak around the store behind the him. Occasionally, Boss would turn his head out of suspicion, causing you to duck behind a shelf, while he thumbed through the racks of clothes.

He was enjoying teasing you like this, smirk still apparent on his face. You were by no means subtle, so Boss knew you were tailing him around, and that only added to his amusement.

You peeked over a row of jackets that were fastened with tassels while Boss sifted through some button up shirts. His foot tapped along to the music with perfect rhythm, though, you were more shocked when his low voice was barely audible.

He was quietly singing along to the tune.

Boss Gothic Serif.

Was singing country.

And he knew you were watching and listening.

The next time he glanced over his shoulder, Boss caught your reddened face as a devious smile curled on his skull. He knew exactly what he was doing.

"Human, I have picked out a suitable ensemble. Feel free to wait there for me to change." You didn't hide this time when he spoke up, accepting defeat, stepping out to follow the monster towards the changing rooms.

You knew from the first day of meeting these skeletons that they would be the death of you. You just didn't expect it to be in a dime store cowboy shop in the city.

Flopping down on another bench, you waited for death to finish his wardrobe swap and drag you to the dark depths- knowing now that he was going to be dressed like a cowboy with Shania Twain playing gently to send you off.

The shuffle of cloth behind the barn themed doors caught your attention, the soft click of bones on wood as a lock was lifted and the doors swung open.

Words choked in your mouth as it hung ajar, Boss stepping out of the small room with the most smug look on his face you had ever seen him muster.

His head was tilted down ever so slightly, burning red eyes shaded by the black hat atop his skull. Your eyes dragged down to the crisp maroon and black button up, gold skull bola tie strung in the collar and rested on his nearly bare breastbone.

The shirt was rolled at the sleeves, showing off his battle scarred hands and arms, and the tail tucked neatly into a pair of tight black dyed jeans; adorned and held up by a red leather belt that had a large gold skull buckle to keep it all together. The jeans hugged the skeleton's frame all the way down to the coordinated boots.

Boss leaned against the doorframe, taking in your reaction with sadistic glee; How you couldn't form a single word in appreciation to his wardrobe selection. How your face was red enough to put his shirt to shame. How your eyes lingered over the single undone button at his clavicle.

How your reaction made his soul thrum with pride.

"Comments?" He finally spoke, beyond amused at the way you startled to his rough voice- dropping it an octave or two, successfully getting further reactions out of you. Finally, you managed to swallow the hard, dry lump that formed in your throat, tearing your gaze away to look back to Boss' expecting eyes.

You coughed and looked away

"Yee. Haw?" Was all you could manage as he stepped forward, boots loudly clacking against the hardwood floor. The terrifying skeleton you called a friend, and obviously waxed red towards, stopped mere feet before you, dragging your attention back to him.

"Is that all you have to say? I would appreciate some feedback, maybe I should make another selection if this doesn't suit me-"

"No, don't!" You found your voice as Boss turned heel to find something else to fluster you with. He quirked a brow ridge at your outburst, returning to his previous position, arms crossed as he awaited to hear your real feelings. 

"You. You look good, Boss." You did your best to hold your voice steady as his gaze made you shrink into the bench, like you were going to become a permanent fixture in the store.

"Just ‘good’?" Oh, he was going to make you suffer. Breathing hard through your nose, you looked back up at him. Boss already knew how you felt, so this was just torture to feed his ego.

And you may as well feed it.

"Fine." There was a pause as you found the words. “You look amazing. Handsome. Stunning.” You could feel your face and neck darkening with each admission- at this point, had you even been referring to just how he looked now? He seemed to preen at each compliment, all too pleased to drink in your words of praise.

"Then I do believe I will purchase these items. They may be in start contrast to the rest of my wardrobe, but some variety in life never hurts."

It was interesting to watch Boss fannagle with the cashier about buying all the clothes items while he was still in them- but he managed to do it, and in style, if you were honest.

With his boots squared away, clothes tucked into his inventory, and you at his side, Boss literally strutted out of the store- leading you both back to his car.

"Human, you make it so easy to fluster you, you do realize that." Boss' smile from before had not left his features, even as you pulled into the culdesac in which you lived.

"Yeah, I'm aware, Boss." You heaved a final embarrassed sigh as the car came to a stop at your curb. Gathering your belongings, and what little bit of pride you had left, the car door swung open and you turned back to him. "Tease the human that has feelings for you. Ha, ha."

"But, uh." You pause, leaning on the door to look Boss in the eyes.

"Have fun getting into your room before Red or Stretch see you, Cowboy."

[luvdsc]

ellipsism.

gold is a bluer color than blue.

pairing :: na jaemin x reader genre :: angst / soulmate + high school au word count :: 1,734 words warnings :: gang, blood, violence, death song :: you were good to me (jeremy zucker & chelsea cutler)

You order a chocolate milkshake.

You never had one before, but they were his favorite.

The boy with blue hair drank them so often that they were all you could taste when your lips pressed against his. He would place one hand on your cheek with the other gently grasping you by the curve of your waist, pulling you closer until he kissed you dizzy. The slightest hints of chocolate stained his breath as he whispered sweet nothings that meant everything to you. He mumbled i love you’s between each breath, sang you lullabies before every exchange of good night’s, and called you endearments sweeter than the sugary concoction he found so much delight in.

The drink is placed in front of you. Fingers curling around the base of the glass, you take a small sip, reveling in the nostalgic taste. You smile.

Chocolate milkshakes might be your favorite, too.

The boy with blue hair was a heartbreakingly beautiful enigma wrapped in a well worn leather jacket and a false bravado that fell apart easily beneath your fingertips once you had found yourself occupying every crevice of his heart. He was blue skies turning into cotton candy pink, whispered wishes slipped between birthday candles, vibrantly yellow dandelions peeking out between cracked pavement, the last wisps of dusk settling into twilight, and the nostalgic song that nestled itself within your years of adolescence and yet, you couldn’t remember the title of for the life of you. He was quiet laughter hidden between the dusty bookshelves of a library, kept promises that were sealed with looped pinkies, stolen kisses as the sunset spilled across the sky, and chilled chocolate milkshakes on a warm day.

Falling in love with the boy with blue hair and a heart wrenching smile was never on your list of things to do in high school, and you didn’t think falling in love with you was on his list either, but love had a funny way of working itself out. A chance encounter on your walk home, an innocent offer of tissues towards your usually absent classmate with a bloody nose, and one glance at this vibrant boy who seemed to hold entire galaxies in his eyes were all it took for you to go head over heels for Na Jaemin.

But you’d also have to thank your soulmate—whoever they were—because if Jaemin hadn’t noticed the odd words stating “Save me a milkshake?” tattooed across your wrist in ebony ink, he wouldn’t have offered to buy you a milkshake in return for the tissues. While sitting in the diner on the corner of Camellia Boulevard and Arcadia Street for the very first time, you found out he was much luckier than you as he showed off a neatly written “I promise” on his wrist.

In a world where soulmate signs came in all different shapes and forms, you were fortunate that yours was straightforward and easy-to-hide. It was supposed to be a simple transition of black into gold as your indicator. It was certainly better than Donghyuck’s sign whose hair color changed every few days courtesy of his soulmate. When you told the boy with blue hair about the day your friend was sporting rainbow streaks, the genuine grin gracing his face as he laughed loudly made him look like an angel, and well, angels never hurt anyone, right?

The boy with blue hair never told you why he was sporting a bruised lip and carmine stains at your very first shared interaction, but you were no stranger to all the swirling rumors at school about the wrong crowd he ran with and the affiliations he had with the darker side of the city. However, you never pried, accepting that he would tell you when the time came and he was ready.

And today, he was finally ready. He was ready to leave that part of his past behind, ready to move on, ready to take charge of his life with you by his side. He was going to tell you today.

Friday afternoons were always reserved for you, but unfortunately, he had to meet with someone from his past one final time. He secretly texted you in class, asking you to meet up a little later than usual at your and his favorite diner where the two of you like to argue over the superior milkshake flavor (you adamantly insist that vanilla is better).  When he received your affirmative reply a few minutes later along with a slew of pretty heart emojis, he beamed brightly before sending back a generous amount of cute emojis in response.

He was excited to show you the A he got on his English paper: the one that you helped him outline and that he stayed up all night perfecting. This was the first time he had put so much time and effort into an assignment, and his teacher was more than thrilled when she received the carefully stapled papers with his name proudly stamped across the cover page. His grades were slowly, but steadily improving, and it was all because of you. He even discovered that he really liked his computer science class and began to research potential classes at nearby community colleges.

Clutching his prized paper in hand, Jaemin stood at the intended meeting spot, enjoying the light drizzle of the rain overhead. The sun barely peeked out from behind the darkening clouds, causing the water droplets to glimmer and gleam as they fell. The gentle pattering of tiny raindrops against his face felt refreshing, almost like a new beginning, a quiet reminder of the rainbow that came afterwards.

Jaemin heard the awful squelching noise before he felt it.

It was an uncomfortable pressure at first until it increased in pain and spread across his abdomen, a cold feeling worming its way up and wrapping around his figure. He had found himself dropping onto the damp concrete, curling in on himself as the papers fluttered loosely from his hand, stained in dark shades of cerise that made its way across the ground.

The blurry figure standing above him stood still for a minute before darting off. No loose ends, he could hear his former boss’s voice echoing in his head. It was what he was told the first time he stepped foot on their territory. How naive of him to believe that they would let him go so easily.

Dragging himself towards the wall behind several empty dumpsters, he propped himself up, pressing down on the wound as best he could but the rivulets of carmine spilled much too quickly and easily, slipping between his fingers. It’s futile, and he knew it, the increasingly harsher waves of pain washing over him with every ticking second. He absentmindedly stared at the A and smiley face adorning his paper in red ink, now barely distinguishable from the other glaring hues of vermilion. The rain poured down, turning the paper translucent as it began to tear around the edges.

Mind going numb from everything but the thought of you—you who was still waiting patiently for someone who would never come—he painstakingly pulled out his phone from his jacket, the device almost falling from his grasp. He clumsily fumbled with it for a few moments before he managed to hit the right buttons. You answered on the first ring, and he smiled, small tendrils of warmth blooming from his heart at the sound of your voice. You were the rose among his garden of thorns, the green light on the other side of the shore, and the beacon of light in the midst of a storm.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he said, taking a deep breath. He hoped that you didn’t notice the way his voice wavered nor the way his breath quickened with every passing second. He hoped that you knew he tried so hard to not fall in love with you, so that you wouldn’t get hurt because of him. He hoped that you could forgive him for falling in love with you anyways. He hoped that you could forgive him for being selfish for the one last time.

“Hey, where are you? Are you alright?” Your worried tone was evident, and he squeezed his eyes shut.  He felt tired, his eyelids drooping slowly, yet he still forced himself to stay awake. He’s sorry for lying to you. “Yeah, I’m fine, just running a little late. Are you already there?”

“Yeah, I just ordered a vanilla milkshake for myself. You know, the best flavor,” you teased him, and he relaxed against the bricks, phone held loosely in his hand.

“Oh, really? I think you’re wrong.”

You scoffed, and he could easily picture the way the corners of your lips tug up into a smile that you desperately try to hide. “ You know what? I’m gonna get you a vanilla one right now instead of chocolate. This is what happens when you’re late.”

“You sure you’re not just buying a second one for yourself?” he laughed softly, and you gasped indignantly. “What do you take me for? A milkshake thief? Maybe I should just drink it myself.”

“No!” He weakly protested, breath growing shallower and weaker. He shakily held up his phone, desperately pressing it against his ear. If he closed his eyes, it was almost as if you were right here, talking to him. He could pretend that he was sitting next to you on vinyl covered seats as you share a plate of fries over vanilla and chocolate milkshakes and his fingers shyly brush against yours as he picks up a fry. He could vividly see how your eyes sparkle as you tell him about your day, and he’ll stare at you, enamored and starry eyed, as some retro love song plays from the jukebox in the corner. 

“Can you promise me something?” he said quietly. The pauses between each heart palpitation grew wider and further apart, and he could faintly hear you answer yes over his slowing heartbeats. He inhaled sharply, his breath stuttering, as he forced the words through his teeth, clenching tightly onto the phone like a lifeline.

“Save me a milkshake?”

On the other side of town, in a tiny booth tucked in a corner of a 1950s themed restaurant, four little words started to shimmer in gold.

“I promise.”

The boy with blue hair smiled.

As the sky wept, a splash of gold twinkled innocently against the darkening asphalt.

[magioffire]

🍵 On Fantasy Tropes you think are stupid?

salt salt salt salt ; accepting

ok lets start with some minor ones: when fantasy writers seem to be obsessed with food. now, im not knocking the worldbuilding power of well written descriptions of food, it can give you an idea of what kind of food is not only present in a culture, but also among social classes, the food customs of a cultural group, and individual characters in general, how they might react to new food or 'gross' food, can be an insight into characterization albeit a little one.

but ive sure everyone who reads fantasy novels has had this experience, where the book is going, going, going, normal amounts of description for things, and then the characters sit down to eat and its like, almost pornographic description of the food. like im ngl, the food described often sounds fucking delicious or at the very least interesting, but my problem is when it slows down the pace of the story/chapter, and is way more descriptive than the rest of the story. also a lot of fantasy writers use food scenes as just a way to exposition dump about the type of foods there are, instead of making it a scene about how characters interact with food and food customs and like, conversations around the dinner table. those are the interesting, juicy bits (no pun intended) of food-centric scenes in fantasy novels. i think the reason fantasy writers do it is because its a way to flex their descriptive, worldbuilding muscles with minimal effort compared to other aspects of worldbuilding lol. i dont believe that food scenes serve no purpose, but i do believe its a trope at this point for fantasy writers to go overboard with their obsession with writing descriptions of food haha.

something a little bit more serious and far reaching: how ideas of good vs evil are portrayed in the fantasy genre, particularly tolkien-esque/inspired, high fantasy genre. its no secret to anyone who has spent any amount of time interacting with the fantasy genre that there are racist, xenophobic, or culturally insensitive undertones to a lot of stuff with the genre, that just kinda get swept under the rug. in western high fantasy, the struggle of good vs evil is not only shown as something with very little shades of grey inbetween, characters are often all or nothing, where entire groups or races in fantasy are considered outright evil or good, and also showing the struggle of good vs evil being synonymous with the duality of dark vs light. and not only is this a very flat, western view of duality, it has roots in colorism and white supremacy.

like for example, 'good' races like elves, for example, are overwhelming shown as tall, white and pale, blonde, eurocentric features, and having a very eurocentric model of society, while on the opposite end of the spectrum, 'evil' races like orcs or goblins, are overwhelmingly portrayed as having 'savage, tribal' societies, having non-western traits and exaggerated traits/caricature traits of people of color, the idea of light vs dark gets played into very literally in this case. or like, how the idea of dark elves vs light elves in norse mythology, has been perverted within the fantasy genre to mean "light skinned, good elves' vs 'dark skinned, evil elves'. or the way much of the americanized world views the fae, specifically the seelie and unseelie courts, where the 'summer' court of the unseelie is automatically seen as good and pure, while the 'winter' court of the unseelie is seen as evil and dark, when in reality within original tradition both courts had morality that was considered beyond human morality, and that they embodied both the fruitful and the destructive traits of their respective areas of nature. a lot of mythology and legends that explore duality get boiled down to these extremely eurocentric, colorist, black and white themes that are very present within the genre of fantasy as a whole.

and its not to say that people cant write orcs anymore, or that we cant write stories about the struggle between light and darkness, but we have to be aware of the history and social implications of it in order to make better fantasy fiction. like we need to be aware of just how much the fantasy genre often shows a very americanized, westernized view of morality and the world, and once you see that, you start to see examples of it everywhere, even in very small ways. theres also a lot of anti-semetic tropes in fantasy genre, and cultural appropriation, and idk, i feel like as a writer in said genre i gotta be aware of these things so i dont fall into the same traps that other writers have.

[sketchfanda]

Rate the Champions

Based off of and inspired by @gale-of-the-nomads and @nerdasaurus1200 rate the akuma,for @beebeebombam Lady Fairy AU,or in this case,the blind butterfly girl herself and her champions. According to wha I’ve learned from posts in bee’s posts on the tag,many of the champions like Alya as Lady Wifi,Max as the Gamer,and Nate as Illuscreator aren’t all too different from canon in tems of their abilities and design. mostly just my way of giving some attention and notice to this AU,which for a guy like me who’s pretty recent into coming into this fandom,but coming to know enough,it’s a fun and sweet AU especially for the fact it gives poor Nooroo much better than what he’s got in canon.

serously,poor little guy,and this is like the only gif I ever find for him. So let’s begin with the blind butterfly princess herself

Marinette Dupain-Cheng,blind but as in canon,a girl with a big heart and a deep sense of empathy,wielder of the moth/butterfly Miraculous,Paris’ maker of heroes Lady Fairy

Design: A+ it really plays up th butterfly theme and motif,her mask being a blindfold is a very nice touch that serves to highlight and remind of her condition. The shades of purple and indigo work well to give a outfit that is as graceful,elegant and posied as the animal its based on and suits her name,coming off like a figure out of a fairy tale plus such glitter and sparkle

Powers: A,it’s the butterfly/moth brooch,as in canon it grants the wielder the ability to empower others and make them superheroes. Of course in this AU it’s made to be used as intended,unlike Gabriel’s selfish,wreckless evil purposes. Especially as unlike Hawkmoth,lady fairy serves more to focus on her champions’ positive emotions,guide them and motivate them rather than force control and obedience into being her puppets and twist and manipulate them at their lowest points. while it’s stated that the moth miraculous can utilise both positive and negative emotions,I feel focusing on the positive makes for a better contrast to how Hawkmoth always seeks out the negative. Bee of course adds a sweet touch to how the wielder can see through their chosen’s eyes,allowing the blind marinette to see the world she normally wouldn’t be able to due to her blindness,giviing her a growing appreciation and love for her city,her loved ones and the colours of life.

theme (As in their gimmick):A.the name,motif and design of the outfit all work together,making her seem like a figure from a court of nobility from a fairy tale

Effectiveness:A.when all seems grim,always know if you have a strong heart,this sweet soul will give you the means to do what’s right,because she believes in you. as a true butterfly wielder should.

Personal enjoyment: A I’ve seen maybe one or two,if not near half a dozen fanarts based on kwami swap with Mari as the butterfly miraculous wielder. This is my personal favourite of the bunch in terms of concept and design.

next we come to the villain of the story,grand iceking douchebag and shitty parent,the socially reclusive bastard Gabriel Aggreste,aka Le Paon,wilder of the peacock miraculous,which I assume isn’t as damaged as it is canon Design- A,very sinister and classy,but different and unique compared to his hawkmoth outfit,but just as enigmatic. has a somewhat sens of style and class to it,which makes sense given peacocks and their natural flamboyance and Gabriel’s status as a fashion designer

Powers- A.as in canon,the peacock brooch is similar but different to the buttefly in that rather than use someone’s emotions to empower them,it takes a partciular emotion they’re feeling and gives it a shape and form,granting the wielder a soldier they can command and control. making it range and very in terms of its shape and form. And unluckily,one needn’t be willing for gabriel to create a sentimonster,not that he cares,fitting given his self serving goal.

Theme- A,sinister yet classy looking individual,with an ability to enforce his will on others,much like he enforces and exerts control over his own’s son’s life. it’s one thing when hetting akumatised twisted you into being evil,but one can barely imagine the horror of being taken advantage of at your emotional low,watching as your anger,or sadness,etc are given the form of a monster that will tear all of paris apart to fulfill a mad man’s goals

Effectiveness - A. like in canon,gabriel is just hiding away,unseen by all of Paris as he keeps his sense tuned for someone at their emotional low,looking to control them much like how he controls his own son’s life. because what he believes in and thinks are right matter most,and for the ones he loves,or passes for love,all of Paris will suffer long as he gets what he wants

Personal enjoyment of the akuma-Be it the moth or the peacoc,Gabriel is as he will always be,a cold distant selfish man whose misguided sense of love and family will burn the world.

Nathalie Sancoeur,personal assistant to the villain himself,in this Au for the heroes day battle,wielder of the ladybug,which garbriel has in his possession. yes he’s halfway to this goal,which raises the stakes Design- A,similar but different to canon,a more villainouse edge thanks to the black sections,and seems to hide nathalie’s identity

Powers- A,it’s the ladybug miraculous,one can only shudder to think hw it works when not wielded by a non heroic wielder.

Theme- Unlike in canon,this is not a heroic ladybug. I’ts Nathalie doing what she thinks is right,which is helping her boss achieve his goals. not helping that she seems to love him and all

Effectiveness - hard to say as we will only see her once in the finale arc,but the ladybug miraculous on the side of devils? weep for paris

Personal enjoyment-n/a

Sabine Dupain-Cheng,Mari’s wonderful mama,aka Scilla Design- A,an elegant look and design that fits and suits the motfi of her daughter,fitting given what her powers in this form do.

Powers- A. simple but effective,she can boost and enhance others’ powers,in this case able to increase Mari’s Miraculous’ abilities as catalyst did with scarlet moth,enabling her to create multiple champions. from a lady to a queen fairy,now able to lead and command her warriors on the field of battle.

Theme- A,really plays to the sparkly classy fairy tale motif of her daughter

Reason for Akumatization-Aor championisation in this case,as bee establishes Sabine’s always known her daughter has been a hero,and given the situation in heroes’ day,how could she not want to help

Effectiveness as an akuma- A,the results speak for themselves

Personal enjoyment of the akuma-A,compared to Nathalie and Hawkmth,it’s a nice little take in reminding us how like in canon,Mari has a wonderfu bond with her parents.

Luka,Kagami,Rose and Juleka,aka Distorter,Riposte,Princess fragrance and Monster Witch

Design- A+,very more heroic takes or twists on Luka,Kagami and Rose’s canon designs,while Juleka’s is very suiting and fitting for her given her goth vibe and motif,with the eyees of coruse referencing Reflekta. makes sense esp as reflekta was more about standing out and getting attention.Rose’s and Luka’s looks are tweaked just enough to not seem like palette swaps whie Kagami’ is less silver samurai,more superheroic samurai knight

Powers- A,Riposte’s hardly needed changing or tweaking compared to her design.Distorter meanwhile is more about using sound as a weapon which can have some unique applications. Juleka’s abilities obviously needed an overhaul,as there would’ve been no way of making a heroic take on reflekta’s powers. here of course it’s more about a means of combatting a sentimonster that creates its own army,while Rose’s is more about helping out and aiding others,akin to healer type chars in rpgs and games like overwatch and team fortress 2

Theme- A,you got a heroic samurai magical girl,a disney princess with a perfume gun,a musician who can truly make music a weapon,and his perky goth sister witch,what’s not to love

Reason for Championization-can’t rate per se,but given this Au and the nature of th buttrfly,Marinette wouldn’t pick just anyone to be her champions

Effectiveness as a champion- A,chat is lucky to have this backup no doubt

Personal enjoyment of the champions-A,be it simle tweaks and overhaul of the designs,to whole new design and powersets,creative aspects like this are what I love about this AU

Nino,Alix,Sabrina,Ondine,Ivan,Mylene,aka Bubble Boy,Timestealer,vanisher,syren,stone warrior and braverator

Design- A,Nino’s is a very welcome change of pace compared to the sentient popsicle blowup clown doll from canon and play to his own personal music hobby,Alix’s is more heroic take on her canon form that still playsup the futuristic rollerblader,Sabrina and Ondine’s hardly needed much changing,though Ondine does have some tweaks here and there,like an additonal fish feature or accessories. Ivan’s livesup to the name,making for an opposing contrast as Stoneheart,while Mylene obviously needed something different,as Horrificator is likely more sentimonster material design wise.

Powers- A+,bubbler’s design was whack,but the powers as seen were definitely something,vanisher and syren’s hardly needed much adjusting either. Stone warrior of course,basically takes his stoneheart’s powers and applies them more to a heroic means.mylene’s of course is very suiting for her,an inverse to how horrificator gained more pwer and size from others’ fear of her,she takes others’ fear and inverts it into bravery.which as bee mentions,is very handy for heroes’ day. Alix’s powers of coruse,are more about taking someone’s speed to add to her own,rather than taking someones life to able to go back in time.

Theme- A,vanisher needn’t be said,but the rest are either simple but effective tweaks and adjustments on familiar designs,or something more original and memorable in its own right

Reason for Championzation-see above for previous champion pic set.

Effectiveness as champions- same as above

Personal enjoyment of the champions-same as above

Doll Angel,the Lady fairy Au’s equiv to the Collector,combining aspect of the Puppeteer akuma.

Design- A,it plays to the same soft color palette and elegant classy fairy tale design of Mari’s outfit as Lady Fairy,minus the butterfly motif. Which makes sense of course as the goal of this form is throw off any traces or connection to her secret identity. The wand of course adds to the theme,and like with her lady fairy outfit,the masks adds a nice hint of mystery and highlights as a reminder of her blindness in this au. Given this is her equivalent to collector,it does the job.

Powers- A. As bee states,it’s similar but different to puppeteer,as well as her miraculous powers. It has the personal touch of utilizing a set of items that are very personal to Mari,in many ways representing how much she cherishes and values the friends in her life,many of whom have been made her champions,so unlike puppeteer it doesn’t force them into their forms and be controlled by her. But rather uses the dolls themselves,who serve as her sort of,rpg companion team. The detail of being able to see brought her dolls’ eyes serves a nice callback to how as lady fairy she sees through her champions eyes

Theme- A,as mentioned in design,it plays to the fairy tale motif,but like collector  it’s different enough 8n terms of ability and design in throwing off the fact she is the butterfly miraculous wielder.

Reason-A,obviously as well as helping out her favourite cat,the reason for making herself a champion is key to throwing off that feathered bastard off of her scent. After what Gabriel pulled in canon as the collector,what’s good for the goose and all…

Effectiveness - A. Like with the collector,it clearly serves its goal and purpose.

Personal enjoyment of the champion-A+ the sweetest design for the sweetest girl in all of Paris.

[loominggaia]

New LG Story Preview

A short scene from the upcoming story “As Nature Intended”.

(Content warning: natural death of an animal)

The main theme of this story is exploring the feral nymphs’ mindset of letting nature take its course, no matter the outcome for peoples. They believe technology shouldn’t be harnessed to extend the lives of man or beast, and all peoples should return to stone-age lifestyles “as nature intended”.

Their ideology has its merits, but obviously most peoples consider it way too extreme. The nymphs point to overpopulated, polluted cities and say “See how barbaric this is? This is why you must regress.”

Meanwhile, peoples point to the unfair brutality of nature and say “See how barbaric this is? This is why we must advance.”

I like this opening scene because I think it sets the stage nicely for exploring these concepts.

           LATE SUMMER, 6000

           With Isaac in their company, the Freelance Good Guys were now six crewmen strong. Not only did they acquire the mysterious boy last month, but his family’s hoard of wealth too. They still hadn’t decided what to do with that wealth. They should buy their own property somewhere, suggested Evan, but where? Which of the Great Kingdoms should they anchor themselves to? They had always been adrift in the world with no home to call their own.

           This wasn’t a decision to make in haste, so for the time being, they committed to nothing. They rented a large, ritzy suite in Matuzu Capital City, where they enjoyed heating, cooling, indoor plumbing, and a stunning view of the jungle vista outside their windows. It was a far cry from the cramped, dirty dives they were used to.

           This was the start of a new life for them all.

           Lukas and Evan reclined in lounge chairs outside the hotel, while Alaine swam laps in the nearby pool. Glenvar wasn’t far, hiding from the brutal Midland sun under the shade of a palm tree. His once fair skin was pink with sunburn, and he groaned and cussed as Jeimos rubbed ointment onto his back.

             What a sane and normal time they were having, thought Evan. But he wasn’t used to sanity or normalcy, and he just couldn’t relax. The lycanthrope lifted his dark glasses and did a head-count of his crew every couple minutes. The lounge area was surrounded by a tall gate, and that still wasn’t enough to soothe his nerves. They made a lot of enemies in their line of work. Anyone could jump them at any moment.

             He saw Isaac, still playing in the patch of greenery near the gate, and closed his eyes again. The next time he opened them, he jumped in surprise, for the boy was hovering right over him with fear in his eyes.

“Captain, I found something in the bushes! Look!” said the boy, and he opened his clasped hands. They were cupped around a peeping ball of feathers.

             Lukas peeked over his glasses at the bird and scrunched up his face. “Isaac, that’s unsanitary! Put that bird back where you found it—they carry lice!”

“But I think he’s hurt!” the boy argued.

“Then let nature take its course!” Lukas argued back, thrusting a finger towards the bushes.

             “Don’t be cold,” Evan warned, shooting his commander a dirty look. Lukas rolled his eyes and reclined back in his chair. Turning back to Isaac, Evan carefully took the bird from him and examined it closer. It was no larger than a chicken’s egg, short of beak with vibrant blue and yellow feathers. Such birds were common in all the Midland regions. What happened to it was anyone’s guess, but its left wing was mangled and it was much too thin. It was too lethargic to struggle, and so it remained still in his palm, occasionally tweeting in protest.

             Evan frowned. “Poor thing. It’s very sick,” he mumbled, carefully stroking its head with his fingertip.

“We have to help him! What can we do to make him better?” asked Isaac. His eyes were wide, voice creaking with desperation.

             Evan hesitated to answer. “Well…” he sighed, but just then, a crowd had gathered around them. The rest of his crewmen saw the commotion and strode over to investigate.

“What’cha got there, Squeaker?” asked Glenvar.

“I found this bird in the bushes over there,” explained Isaac, taking the creature back from Evan. “He can’t fly ‘cause his wing is all crumply, see? We gotta help him!”

             “Oh, how dreadful! The poor creature, it must be in terrible pain,” said Jeimos, pressing a hand to their aching heart.

Glenvar took the bird from Isaac and looked it up and down, jostling it around in his hand. It made no attempt to escape. “Yep, thing’s fecked alright,” he decided, then placed it on the ground and lifted his booted foot. “I’ll make it quick fer ya, pal…”

             “No!” screeched Isaac. He leaped forward and tackled Glenvar down, both of them nearly tumbling into the pool. The boy scooped up the bird and hugged it close to his chest, tears welling in his eyes as he cried, “Don’t kill him! That’s not fair! We can help him, I know we can! We have to try!”

             “It’s just a stupid coconut-sparrow! They breed and die like vermin every day. What’s so special about this one?” grumbled Lukas.

Evan quieted his commander with a threatening glare, then patted Isaac’s shoulder and told him, “We’ll do everything we can.”

             The mercenaries took the bird back to their suite, where they began searching for a container to keep it safe. All but Lukas, who complained from his seat on the couch, “This is ridiculous! We’re all going to wake up with head lice, and for what? That thing’s as good as dead anyway.”

             His words made Isaac burst into tears. “No, no, no! I don’t want him to die, we can’t let him die…!” he sobbed. Evan had enough. He pulled his wallet from his pocket and pitched it at Lukas. It smacked into the commander’s belly and he doubled over with a grunt.

             “Make yourself useful and pick up a feeding syringe from the chemist,” ordered Evan. Lukas obeyed with a dramatic groan, stuffing the wallet in his pocket as he disappeared through the door. It slammed shut behind him.

             The others found a wooden box in one of the closets and lined it with cloth. After carefully washing the bird with soap and warm water, Isaac placed it in the box. “Don’t climb out, okay, Coco? You have to rest so your wing can get better,” he said.

“Coco? Is that its name now?” asked Alaine, leafing through a magazine across the room.

             Evan said, “Don’t get too attached to it, Isaac. It’s a wild animal, we can’t keep it forever.”

“I know…” the boy sighed. He held a mortar and pestle in his lap, grinding seeds into dust like Glenvar showed him. He mixed it with water to form a thin paste, and when Lukas returned with a syringe, he fed it to the bird.

             The other mercenaries went about their business, enjoying all the amenities the hotel had to offer. All the while, Isaac refused to let Coco out of his sight. For two days he dutifully cared for the bird, stroking its feathers, entertaining it with stories, changing its soiled cloth, and diligently feeding it on a schedule. His crew tried to beckon him away, tried to encourage him to play outside and do other things, but Isaac simply wouldn’t budge until he knew the bird was well.

             He went as far as to sleep beside Coco’s box on the floor each night. “Don’t sleep on the floor like a mongrel! Come on, we spent a mint on this place so you could have a nice, clean bed for once,” Evan told him as the boy spread his blanket and pillow on the sitting room floor.

Isaac said, “I don’t want him to be alone,” and that was that. Nothing Evan said could change his mind, so the captain gave up and retired to his room.

             Every few hours, Coco would peep to wake Isaac for food. And each time, Isaac diligently tended to the bird’s needs, no matter the hour. Three days after he found Coco, Isaac awoke to sunlight beaming in through the window and realized he’d slept all through the night.

             He sat up and peered inside the box. Coco was still and quiet. “Coco?” Isaac queried, nudging the creature with his finger. It didn’t move. He picked it up and the body was rigid in his hands. “Coco, wake up,” begged Isaac. “Please wake up! It’s time to eat now!” There was still seed paste leftover in the syringe from last night. Isaac offered it, but the bird wouldn’t respond even to food.

             The suite was silent at this early hour. The mercenaries were fast asleep in their respective rooms. The moment Isaac’s wails broke the silence, every bedroom door flew open and all five of his crewmen came stumbling into the sitting room, groggy and half-dressed.

             “Isaac, w-what’s wrong? You alright?” asked Evan, fussing with his prosthetic leg. Isaac sat on the floor with a stiff heap of feathers in his hands, tears streaming down his cheeks. He couldn’t speak through his sobs, so he held out his hands to show them. Evan frowned as he took Coco’s body and set it back in the box. “I’m sorry, son,” he said softly.

             “That’s all? Gods, I thought the kid was being murdered out here, with all his screaming!” snapped Lukas. Alaine snatched his earlobe and squeezed to silence him. Once Lukas was kneeling in submission, she stepped forward and pulled Isaac into a hug.

             “Aww. Don’t cry, small fry,” she said, drying his tears with her thumbs. “That bird could’ve died alone in the wilderness, but you made its final days really special. I’m sure it was grateful for that.”

Isaac’s breath hitched, tears still pouring as he sobbed, “H-he can’t be dead! He can’t be, it’s not fair! I thought he was getting b-better! What did I do wrong?”

             “Don’t blame yourself, Izzy. Sometimes these things just happen,” Jeimos assured him.

“Yep,” agreed Glenvar. “Man or beast, when the stars call yer name, it’s time to go. That’s just the way it is.”

             Isaac wiped his nose on his arm and sniffled, “Where’s he going? What happens after things die?”

The mercenaries hesitated, exchanging anxious glances. How could they answer such a heavy question? How could they explain in a way that the boy would understand?

             How could they admit that they did not have all the answers, when he was already so scared and confused?

             “Er, the answer to that is…quite complicated,” Evan began carefully.

Before he could continue, Glenvar butted in, “Pff, it ain’t complicated! It’s all very simple. Come on, kiddo, I’ll show ya. Let’s give this beast a proper funeral.”

             With that, the mercenaries pulled on their coats and shoes and ventured outside. They had placed the lid over Coco’s box, sealing the body inside like a coffin, and carried it to a scenic park not far from the hotel.

             The park was quiet at this hour. Storks skimmed the water in search of food, morning birdsong chiming in the treetops. Glenvar took the box from Isaac and placed it in the lake, where it floated on the surface like a boat. He poured a bit of alcohol over it from his flask, then dropped a match and set it ablaze.

             “Why are we burning him?” cried Isaac.

Nudging the box with his foot, Glenvar sent it drifting across the lake. “’Cause everything that burns becomes smoke,” replied Glenvar, gesturing to the sky, “and smoke always goes up. It goes up all the way into the sky, above the trees ‘n birds ‘n mountains. The body becomes ash and the spirit becomes a star. Where do ya think all them stars up there came from, huh? Those are all the spirits of our ancestors lookin’ down at us.”

             “Really?” sniffled Isaac. He looked up, and in the early dawn sky he could still see the faint twinkle of stars.

Jeimos began, “Actually, stars are created by a gravitational collapse of nebulous gases, primarily hydrogen and helium, which—”

Slapping a hand over the elf’s mouth, Alaine interrupted, “Coco’s in a better place now. You can’t feel pain or hunger or sadness if you don’t have a body, right? Now he’s a shooting star, flying higher and faster than any bird’s flown before!”

             Isaac’s gaze followed the trail of smoke back down to the pond, where the flaming box slowly drifted away. After a while, it sunk and the fire went out with a hiss. “What about his body? What’s gonna happen to it now?” he asked.

             “It’ll go the way of all fleshly things,” answered Evan. “His body will feed the worms, and the worms will feed the soil. The soil feeds the plants, which feed the beasts, which feed the peoples, and the cycle begins again. Death doesn’t mean ‘the end’. It’s just the beginning of something new, you see?”

             Isaac stared hard at the pond, furrowing his brow in thought. He turned the crew’s words over and over in his head, trying to make sense of it all. “Does that mean everything dies? Even…us?” he asked, eyes rounding with fear.

             “I’m afraid so,” Evan told him. He forced his lips into a little smile, though his eyes were doleful. “But gods willing, we’ll all live full, happy lives on Gaia before then.”

Jeimos added, “Don’t be frightened, Izzy. Even more frightening than death is a world without it! Can you imagine how awful that would be? We’d all be packed together like sardines in a tin with no way to escape! The old must make room for the new. It’s just the natural order of things.”

             Evan nodded and said, “That’s right. It’s the fleeting nature of life that makes it so precious in the first place.”

             Their words were starting to make sense to Isaac. But if what they said was true, why did he still feel so sad? “I don’t like it. It hurts,” he pouted.

“I know. It always does,” said Evan. He placed a hand on the boy’s back and began leading him away from the pond. “I’m sorry you had to go through this. You’ve never lost anyone before, have you?”

             Furrowing his brow in thought, Isaac replied slowly, “I…don’t think so. Um, except my mom. But I can’t remember her. I still don’t remember anything from before my birthday.”

Evan simply hummed back. They were bound to have this discussion sooner or later. He was just glad Isaac’s first bereavement was over an animal rather than a crewman.

             “Well, this day is off to a rather bleak start,” said Jeimos. “We should take the boy for an outing to lift his spirits.”

“Hey, yeah! Let’s go to the zoo or something,” added Alaine.

Isaac sniffled, wiping the last of his tears on his sleeve, and asked, “What’s a ‘zoo’?”

             “You’re about to find out,” Evan smiled. “Let’s head back to base and get ready, shall we? I won’t have any more tears on my crew today.”

             The mercenaries returned to the hotel, and later that morning, they left again for a lovely outing. But even as he marveled at magnificent and exotic beasts, Isaac’s mind kept wandering back to the little coconut-sparrow he lost. Their time together was brief, yet Coco had captured his heart.

             Days passed into weeks, into months, into years. Time healed Isaac’s grief and his memory of Coco faded, drifting away into the rolling sea of joy and pain that crashed against him over the years. The little bird was his first taste of death, but it would be far from his last.

*

[bookcoversalt]

A+ youtube video! I feel like this is a dumb question, but what other sources, exercises, etc would you suggest for a writer wanting to get better at, like, everything you do in that video? I feel like I'm just not intelligent when it comes to writing and reading. I slap down whatever seems fun and I'm sure it makes for a bland story full of stupid plot holes and everything you talked about, so how does one get better at dissecting this stuff and...writing/reading intelligently?

Thank you so much!! There’s a tendency to consider analytical people just “smart”, as if the observations they make come naturally to them. But that super isn’t true: being thoughtful and critical about media, like drawing or writing or playing a sport or learning an instrument, is a skill that you pick up by absorbing reference, learning the language of the art form, and then practicing replicating it through your own perspective.

ABSORBING REFERENCE

My two biggest critical inspirations are Lindsay Ellis, a video essayist who covers film and culture, and Film Crit Hulk, a screenwriter and movie critic, and I’ve been consuming their work since I was 15. (I’m 25 now! that’s a wholeass decade.) I've picked up many, may other sources along the way: other video essayists, pop culture commentators, TV critics, spirited roasts of 50 shades of gray, actual “writing craft” books and blog articles, long goodreads reviews of books I thought I had a pretty good grasp of the flaws on, funny booktube reviews, even “anti” posts. I read “how the last season of game of thrones went the fuck off the rails” articles til my eyes bled, not because I cared about game of thrones, but because there was so much good, insightful reporting being done on How And Why A Story Fell Apart.

LEARNING THE LANGUAGE

Not all of this is good or useful. There’s a lot of bad faith or shallow criticism out there. The cinemasins clickbaity style of nitpicking “plot holes” or penalizing a work for the mere presence of tropes without regard for broader artistic intent and cultural context is particularly insidious and should die. The people who think twilight is stupid because it has sparkly vampires are missing the point. A LOT of people critique YA in particular from a place of bitterness or bias or misplaced expectations (and so did I, to some degree, for a long time. I’ve worked really hard to grow out of that, I hope). But the point is to seek out content in this vein-- not what I consumed necessarily (I would not wish that many GOT thinkpieces on anyone), but stuff that interests you. The more of this you mindfully consume and the more perspectives you collect and compare, the more context you’ll have for what’s being discussed and the more you'll naturally start to form your own opinions on it. You will learn, slowly, by osmosis, to pull what strikes a chord with you from the noise.

REPLICATING IT THROUGH YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVE

The cool and fun part is that to some extent, your brain will start doing this on its own. You’ll read a book and you'll just notice more. You’ll call plot twists faster, or be more cognizant of the pacing, or connect dots you might not have otherwise connected. You’ll see the logistic scaffolding in your own work more clearly and you’ll be more aware of choices you’re making subconsciously. You’ll recognize thematic hypocrisy or worldbuilding inconsistencies and have the language to name them.

And you’ll also have the tools to explore your less clear-cut, more emotional reactions to art. And this is the most important but “hardest” part of this: sitting with vague feelings and unformed thoughts trying to suss out what’s at the heart of them and why, using your hard-won critical “training” and your contextual knowledge.

I like to frame them as questions:

Why did the end of [book] feel disjointed? Why didn’t I connect with the main character in [book]? What really resonated with me about the plot of [book]? Why does [character] appeal to me more than [other character]? Why does [book]’s use of [theme] make me uncomfortable?

Sometimes it comes down to just preference or subjective taste, and that’s fine and good to know. But more often than not, you’re reacting to something concrete that can be identified: 

The ending of HOUSE OF SALT AND SORROWS feels disjointed because it comes out of nowhere and has nothing to do with our heroine’s efforts in the larger story. I didn’t connect with the main character in HEARTLESS because within the context of the worldbuilding, her choices didn’t make sense. What really resonated with me about the plot of UPROOTED is its thematic coherency. The Darkling appeals to me more than Mal because the villain romance power fantasy aspect of the series is better fleshed out and ultimately more rewarding to read than the love story of two flawed teenagers. ACOWAR’s use of trauma and recovery makes me uncomfortable because it ceases to be a sincere element of anyone’s arc or characterization and becomes yet another tool to make Rhys look like the best and coolest and wokest fae boyfriend.

Pulled from an old Captain Awkward article, this is something I have in a sticky note on my desktop as sort of a criticism guide: 

One of the things we try to do is to push past “I liked it”/”I didn’t like it” as reactions to work. What is it? What is it trying to be? Is it good at being that thing? Was that a good thing to try to be in the first place? Did the artist have a specific agenda? How did it play with audiences at the time? Does it play the same way now? What stereotypes does it reinforce/undermine?

Even if it’s only for your own personal growth rather than intended for an audience, I recommend putting burgeoning critical thoughts or questions you’re trying to “work through” down in writing somewhere: goodreads reviews! tweets! blog posts! spamming your group chat! Even just a private word document. The synthesis of thoughts into written content forces you to identify and choose a specific articulation of your idea(s). If it’s in a pubic or semipublic forum, you’ll also be able to see which of your ideas resonate with other people, and that can (isn’t always, but CAN) be useful information as far as having an external barometer for when you’re onto something.

And then..... you do that a bunch of times in different ways for many years, with a lot of different books and movies and games and whatever else. Like any other skill, you will get better the more you do it. (Again: I have been doing this for ten years now, and it still took me three months to write that video script. Forming nuanced, informed opinions and then articulating them coherently is hard.)

As kind of a footnote tip, seek out peers who have the same goals and feelings, and try to connect with them! Lots of my current internet friends found me back when I was posting on my personal blog about problems i had with THE SELECTION or RED QUEEN and we bonded over having similar opinions and being in similar places in our writing/ reading/ careers. These people now beta read my scripts and posts and help me brainstorm or refine ideas. I strongly believe that creatives (and critics) do their best work and grow the most within a network of support and feedback.

But also, in regards to creative writing in particular, i want to be clear that having fun is the most important thing. I absolutely think creators need analytical skills to improve their craft, but without the enjoyment of doing the thing at the core of it, there is no craft at all. If you have to choose between the "smart” thing and the fun thing, choose the fun thing. Tbh, if you’re worried your work is bland, analysis probably isn’t the solution--  figuring out how to have more fun is the solution. And letting yourself lean into the stuff that’s wild and awesome and so incredibly you that it sets you on fire to write is a skill of its own :)

[danwhobrowses]

Why ‘The Karate Kid Part II’ Deserves More Respect

So guess what film I finished watching today? Of course, the Karate Kid franchise is considered iconic mainly for its first entry; Wax on Wax off, Skeleton fights, Sweep the Leg and the Crane Kick all cemented its legacy that allowed Cobra Kai to also be such a success. But imagine my shock when the approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes for Part II is 45% - 21% lower than the Jaden Smith ‘The Karate Kung Fu Kid’ version (and Part III is scored 15%, which is also super harsh but hard to debate outside of the magnificence of Terry Silver). Originally this was just gonna be a general post of how much I enjoyed retreading Part II, but upon seeing that score I had to give it my ‘Deserves More Respect’ posts.

It is an off-chance, but if you haven’t watched this film there will be spoilers within, I encourage you to watch it before reading, and maybe watch it again if you have so it’s fresh in the mind

Let’s start with a controversial point shall we? There are several parts where Part II is actually better than the original. Now I know! There’s a lot about the original which is iconic, but nostalgia does blind you to other shortcomings and while it’s easy to sell the first part because of its mystique, a sequel has the added pressure of rising above and developing on old and new themes set by the predecessor. The Premise In case you decided against refreshing your memory. Karate Kid Part II starts with a recap of Part I, a bit of content that was meant to be Part I’s final scene (in the script, not for filming) and then a timeskip. Ali with an i is gone - brutally dumping Daniel for some Football Player before Senior Prom and after crashing his car, Daniel’s mother is in Fresno for work and Miyagi has received a letter from his home Okinawa in news of his father’s fading health. The stage is set for Daniel and the audience to learn more about the iconic Mr. Miyagi and the life he left behind. Okay, so there is bad in this film Part II deserves respect, but it’s not perfect. It definitely gets messy near the end with Daniel’s antagonist Chozen, he mainly took beats from Johnny Lawrence in physically confronting Daniel when he could with a bunch of no-named goons and he fought pretty similarly to Johnny in catch counters and leg strikes. The opening recap did take a lot of time too, while the ending remained somewhat abrupt having just beaten up Chozen to embrace Kumiko (who had a delayed recovery after being punched once). While not bad, a fair amount of retreaded content felt like downgrades of the original; Chozen and Sato lacked the charisma of Johnny and Kreese, the crane kick was far more impressive than the drum technique and the Tournament setting was grander than the O-Bon festival. But, there are Iconic Moments in this film too Part I may have the Crane Kick and the Skeletons and the Training and Sweep the Leg. But people may forget that Part II had awesome moments too.

Like Daniel chopping through 6 Sheets of Ice! If that isn’t one hell of a power play I don’t know what is. It is a moment genuinely impressive in and outside of the 80s cheese universe of Karate Kid, and it gets referenced in Season 2 of Cobra Kai.

Also referenced in Season 2 is Miyagi vs Kreese. While this is the intended ending for Part I, it certainly acted better at the start of Part II, especially given that is foreshadows the situation Daniel finds himself in at the end of the movie. This moment is equally iconic as it completely encapsulates the character of both senseis - Kreese the confident brute brought to a sniveling mouse when size and power failed him and Miyagi the cool-headed and vastly more intelligent fighter still with the cheeky prankster lightness to him as he honks the scared shitless Kreese on the nose. Perfect.

While I did want to cite the Tea Ceremony as well I think the more iconic moment for Part II had to be Miyagi chopping the log during the storm. The storm itself is a very well-done scene which unmasks several characters in the face of adversity. True tension, worry and stakes are sold as the village are in danger of the cruel whims of nature, an act which is all too real for Sato when the house he’s in collapses on him in the calm before his scheduled deathmatch with Miyagi. Not only is this again some great foreshadowing by the rule of three (Daniel asking if Miyagi can chop a log like Sato is doing with a banner and then Miyagi and Sato meeting and seeing Sato fail to chop a log) it proves a pivotal point where Sato turns from aggrieved antagonist to repenting ally. A great show of power and friendship as Miyagi metaphorically breaks the rift between their friendship that weighs Sato down. Okay, we hear you, but how is it better? I do have to preface that I do still love Part I, I have to because in pointing out where Part II is better I have to pick at Part I’s faults. While the ending is messy Part II definitely has much better pacing, until the skeletons scene Part I doesn’t really pick up because it has to set up, Part II while it does recap doesn’t need to worry about it. Giving Miyagi the main plot was definitely Part II’s strongest suit. Part I profited from Miyagi being the ‘mysterious old teacher’ but learning a lot more about his humanity and history was engrossing and it allowed positive development for Miyagi and Daniel, especially their bond as a surrogate father and son when Daniel personally goes out of his way to support Miyagi on a very personal matter. The main characters maintain their charm as well, still a lovely array of life lessons in Part II more than just finding balance, Miyagi teaches Daniel through words and action on taking time to breathe, to refocus when imbalanced, to forgive rather than to harbour hate, mercy, selflessness and humbleness

“never put passion before principle. Even if win, you lose.” - Mr. Miyagi

The scenes involving Miyagi and his father were some of the most deep and emotive of the series up until Cobra Kai, some still haven’t been topped such as Miyagi’s dad’s first words to his son or when Daniel talked about when his father died.  And say what you will about Chozen, he does have a lot of Johnny vibes but a lot of the character we believed was Johnny due to nostalgia goggles was more fitting of Chozen’s manner. The story did a great job in making sure Chozen was always an asshole, at times Johnny did at least display honour and grace but Chozen was always sore about stuff and quick to claim dishonour even when he was in the wrong. Contrary to Johnny it’s more about his family than it is about a girl, which allowed a lot more freedom in the plot. Whether you felt Elizabeth Shue’s Ali with an i was prettier than Tamlyn Tomita’s Kumiko is up to personal preference, but the messy-haired Kumiko definitely had a slightly improved presence in Part II than Ali did, with actual focus on her own feelings outside of attraction to Daniel, her ambition to become a dancer directly linking to the O-Bon Festival - which in turn related to the Drum technique - as well as the delicately beautiful Tea Ceremony scene and actually contributing to the final fight (granted Ali wouldn’t be allowed to). Also Daniel didn’t try to eat her face which is a general improvement to the romantic subplot, extra applause has to go to Tomita here too because this was legitimately her first role - Shue had her second so that’s impressive too - and both women had good careers going forward. The increased stakes definitely worked in the favour of Part II as well, as sequel culture is forced to do, but by moving to Okinawa (actually filmed in Hawaii) we opened the door to better suit Miyagi’s world while keeping Daniel the fish out of water. I can’t speak too much for appropriation because there is still kinda some ‘white saviour’ undertones but I didn’t feel like Japan was treated negatively in this light, its culture of the O-Bon Festival and the Tea Ceremony was treated with the utmost respect and explained without pandering, the flute music had definitely stepped up its game for the soundtrack as did the imagery. Can also appreciate that Daniel does go for the Crane kick when fighting Chozen but is parried. Added hat tip has to go to costuming too. A lot of costumes would have to have distinct Kamon such as Sato’s twin fish and Miyagi’s bonsai on a lot of their clothing

Between Sato and Miyagi the colours of their clothes often code their emotions towards each other, with Sato usually in grey and Miyagi in white or cream, when Sato and Miyagi prepare for death they are in black and when Sato wants forgiveness he moves to a lighter shade. While Part I also used black and white to differ Johnny and Daniel, Part II put Chozen and Daniel in the more Japanese-themed Red and Blue. While both men wear red, blue and whites at time, Chozen’s clothes almost devolve from the white he debuts in as his darker side comes out before flat out embracing yellow after his chance to prove his honour in the storm is refused (and he’s in white then), while Daniel often moves to Red or red tones even in his blue shirt. Kumiko also moves from white to blue, sometimes even purple, in set up to the final fight to have the primary colours stand out in the colourful crowd of the O-Bon festival, but even in the blue Kumiko had red to pair her connection with Daniel. Also her Yukata at the festival is just stunning, the Great Wave off Kanagawa print is a nice touch.

Anything else we should know? It might not be much else about the film itself I can tell you, but I do appreciate something I’m starting to call ‘The Rocky Connection’ when it comes to Karate Kid. Like Part I’s ‘You’re the Best (Around)’ was shortlisted for Rocky III, Part II’s song ‘Glory of Love’ was shortlisted for Rocky IV’s theme, losing to ‘Hearts on Fire’, Bill Conti also chose to score this film instead of Rocky IV. I like to pair this with Daniel’s Rocky-esque character, he has that same kind of swagger but a lot more naive and childlike. Martin Kove also gets a nod because those bleeding hands were legit, he had an accident on-set and the footage was kept for the final cut. Tamlyn Tomita wasn’t the only film debut for Part II, B.D. Wong of...well, several famous roles including but not limited to Shang in the animated Mulan, Dr. Wu in the Jurassic Park franchise, Hugo Strange in Gotham and many more, also had his debut here in a minor speaking role when he’s handing out flyers for the dance party to Kumiko and Daniel before the Ice Chopping Scene. So, why does it deserve respect A film that adds to a beloved character in a respectful fashion without having really any god awful moments does not deserve a 4.5/10 rating. It may not have as emphatic an ending or as great a villain but it has a captivating plot and a good pace, better stakes and much more emotionally driven and responsive scenes. A lot of effort and dedication went into this film to explore new dimensions of the main characters in a fashion which was enjoyable and at times heartwarming. And characters are given human moments, even Miyagi confesses himself not to be perfect and it keeps each character grounded. Even to this day parts of Part II are remembered fondly rather than the campness that Part III had outside of Terry Silver and his magnificent ponytail, the fondness also continues to reflect in Cobra Kai with homages and fan theories of Daniel going to Okinawa again and even re-encountering Chozen. Not to mention it grossed $113m on a $13m budget and got nominated for a Best Original Song Oscar (losing to Top Gun) Part II was a good and enjoyable film which deserves far more credit than to be rated this low, for that it deserves respect.

[plush-anon]

SCOOB! Stream of Consciousness Review

Here we are folks - I finally review the originally cinematic, fully CGI animated Scooby Doo Movie (one year later... I did not queue this as I thought I had last June - damn you, Tumblr. I’m not changing much here, so enjoy as it was intended).

Created by a team who have professed their affection for this mystery team and their meddling dog too, will this be a lush experience fit to satisfy any Hanna-Barbera fan? Or will it be a hot garbage cash-grab, littered with Easter eggs and references that do nothing to hide a meatless mess of outdated memes and shallow character development?

LET’S

FIND

OUT

Below this cut is my entire stream-of-consciousness review on the SCOOB! Movie, as experienced. SPOILER warning here - I’m digging into everything, no plot points spared. 

Here we go~

And we start off with a decent shot of the California coastline (looks like the kids backstory is front and center), some 90s hip-hop synthwave song about California, and OH SWEET JESUS THESE MODELS LOOK TERRIBLE

Ahem

Yeah, this is a problem right off the bat - some of these people in the opening shots look remarkably unfinished - think three shades above “Rapsittie Kids: Believe in Santa” level - and the animation on them is less than stellar. 

On the plus side, we do see a fantastic variety of ages, sizes, and races - there’s a brief blink-and-you’ll-miss-it Sikh man on roller skates playing a sitar - but when the designs look rushed in the opening shots, it’s not a fantastic sign. At least they’re brief, but it’s hard to see if this is a lower level of the film’s style due to rushed animation, or if they didn’t care to polish it up as much, given that it’s maybe a 30 second scene. 

Still, kudos to actually going for variety in the crowd shots. Minus kudos to making most of the clothes look like Play-doh draped over a Barbie doll. I’m not even kidding on that one, the clothes are super basic and barely have any sign of texture or creasing or even fabric/cut variety. Almost reminds me of the first Toy Story movie’s design for human clothes, yeesh. 

----

Ahh, our first introduction to Scooby Doo at a Greek gyro food stand. That’s foreshadowing right there folks! 😉

Sadly, he is really weirdly animated in his run sequence - he looks out of proportion as he’s running on his hind legs, and the human animation has really bad consistency - some background characters are really janky, while others actually move really nicely. The characters we immediately focus on seem to be pretty smooth at least, but that’s still very strange.

On a side note: Ruby and Spears Sub Sandwich shop. Nice 😁

----

They are reaaaally pushing the super over-the-top dramatic music for a bike cop chasing a dog that stole gyro meat

Why

It’s not even interesting chase music, just generic super-hyped-up chase music

----

And now we finally get to see a young Shaggy, standing next to a tie-dye food stand called Casey’s Confections that… sells meat. Hm. Guess WB hasn’t learned after all these years 🙄

Unfortunately, I’m not a huge fan of the kid they got to play him, Iain Armitage. He’s not a bad voice actor by any means, but he just doesn’t sound right for Shaggy. I know that as a kid he’d be much less likely to have a cracking/squeaky voice, but he sounds… it’s hard to pin down a word, but - precocious? Darling? Either way it doesn’t quite match, especially given how Shaggy sounds when he grows up via Will Forte. Just… no connection there. 

I tie it down to the particular vocal twangs and nuances the gang usually has. I’ll touch base on that note later I think, once we hit the teenage versions of the gang, but for now I’m just not feeling it. 

----

On the one hand, I empathize deeply with Shaggy and his Spotify’s unsettling ability to pinpoint his insecurities with song choices, and also deeply enjoy that one small gesture where his fingers kind of shake & tighten around his phone while he takes a deep breath to calm himself- it’s a very nice, subtle sign of frustration

On the other hand we just passed two guys with no nipples and an unerring likeness to a Ken doll in those Barbie movies, so I’m distracted by that now

(between this and Fred’s no-nipples in Happy Halloween SD!, is WB just terrified of giving men nipples in animated movies now? what gives?)

Also distracted by the thrifty lesbians who bought those two shirts that come together to make a heart in the middle, on the store’s 2 for 1 day

happy pride y’all!

---

Finally got context for the two sand piles!

Very, very sad context, but still! Progress!

Basically Shaggy’s practicing talking to people in order to learn how to make friends, since he either has no idea how, or has never had a friend before. So he’s trying to learn the right way to do it since his own attempts have failed

And him talking to these sand piles not only counts as practice, but he’s using them so that his mom thinks he’s spending time with friends like he told her

Ow :)

---

So ketchup leather is apparently a thing that exists

I’m learning so much today!

---

Given that Shaggy has no friends at this stage, but he’s still called Shaggy, I’m kind of wondering if that was a mean nickname that everyone called him, but he was just grateful for the interaction/pretended it was from friends, so he kept it 🤔

Actually, take it back, his mother is calling him that. Family nickname, maybe…?

----

Shaggy has Blue Falcon (classic) and Dynomutt funko pops

noice

---

Oof, you can reaaaaally hear the age in Frank Welker’s Scooby voice. Can we get Scott Innes back? He sounds almost identical to his performance 20+ years ago :/

Also talking waaaay too much - even SDMI Scooby wasn’t this wordy, and he NEVER shut the hell up 

----

Okay wait

So Shaggy met Scooby on Halloween day - then met the rest of the gang hours later?

Huh. And here I was thinking it would have been a few weeks minimum 

Although I have to say there is a lot here to work with, if it paces out how I think it does

Shaggy meets Scooby. Bare hours later, he buys him a collar (instead of his mom? weird) and asks him to stay with him, despite not really knowing him. Then, only a couple hours after that, he finally makes some friends… but only when Scooby is with him. 

Given that it looks like the gang are all around the same age in the same neighborhood, there’s a solid chance that they’ve taken classes together at the same school. If none of them met/knew/made friends with Shaggy then, but only did so AFTER Scooby came into the picture, that might lead to the argument we know about later when they split up; afterwards, S&SD go to the bowling alley, then get abducted by the Blue Falcon, plot continues. This could make it seem like they were only friends with him at the start because he had a dog. 

And the brief scene earlier with the music device shows that he tries to tamp down on his anger/doesn’t really address it - could lead to something more later 

hmmmm 🤔

---

Wait what

These two kid bullies just came out of nowhere, stole Shaggy’s candy… and then started on about how Halloween is only a marketing ploy to get companies to rot your teeth and go to the dentist more, before throwing the bag through a window and telling the two that ‘your blood sugar will thank us for it!’

Are - are these the brainwashed children of a Karen? Is that what I’m seeing?

I mean we could have had a Red Herring cameo, but apparently informing children about candy conspiracy theories is more important :/

----

Daphne: It’s Halloween - no one should go home without their candy

FD&V: *none of them have candy/candy bags*

???????

(Wouldn’t it make more sense if the bullies had stolen their candy too? What the hey man)

----

I do find it neat that we actually get to SEE the wires the ‘ghost’ uses to fly in full effect - that’s actually pretty cool, and not really something we get to see up close in older Scooby shows. Most of those just have the bad guy randomly flying about, and the wires revealed after the fact 

---

Actually, given how FD&V react to this ghost almost immediately… have they already been solving mysteries? It seems like it, given how smoothly they move together to capture him

That’s kind of odd in kids. Like, even in PNSD they weren’t perfectly in-sync on stuff

This then leads to the gang solving mysteries together… in spite of the fact that all Shag and Scoob did was hide in the wardrobe that had the stolen goods, while FD&V captured the dude 

Granted, they do ask Shag and Scoob if they wanna join in and say yes, but that seems like an strange jump after what could have been a one-time deal

I just find that a touch odd - esp when they could have had a five minute scene or so of them wandering around the house, touching on some old SDWAY traits. Heck, show that they’re SCARED in some way, and don’t immediately move to tackle what looks like a murderous spirit at age 8-9 or so. Even just showing the kids learning about each other would be enough, but what do I know. I’ve only watched Scooby Doo everything since I was 4 🙄

---

Ahhhh, and now for the updated rendition of the theme song

Where they’re all still kids doing everything the teenage gang did in the theme song

It doesn’t look as good as the OG, though - kind of like a computer game simulating the SDWAY intro using the PNSD kids in CGI. It’s honestly strange to see, and a little jarring - especially when we then transition to the older teenage gang right in the middle

Like, we don’t get to see you guys age through the song as you’re chased by/catch different monsters? That could have been pretty neat honestly - shows how long they’ve been doing this

Tho I gotta admit, seeing the Spooky Space Kook with his OG sound effects is pretty awesome, brief as it waoH MY GOD FRED WHY ARE YOU HAVING A ROMANTIC BEACHSIDE DATE WITH THE MYSTERY MACHINE 

THAT WASN’T IN THE ORIGINAL AND NO ONE ELSE GETS A CHARACTER INSIGHT SHOT LIKE THIS

WHY

----

Huh, looks like Ruby & Spears gave up their subway sandwich shop for a coffee shop

That apparently the gang goes to in order to eat malt shop food

okay?

----

Ah, and here’s where we finally look at the voice acting of the older teenage gang. Buckle up folks, cause I gotta lot to say

We’ll start with Fred, bc honestly? I think Efron actually fits him pretty dang well. He’s got a different cadence from Welker, true, but as far as an update goes? I think he’s a solid fit. Very much in line with the all-American kid that Fred’s kind of been slated as for the past 50 years or so, but updated more for the modern perspective. I call it solid (and possibly a replacement for whenever Welker decides to retire). 

Next? Oof. Velma is, IMHO, the weakest casting. Velma, no matter her voice actress, has ALWAYS had some form of nasal twang to her voice - that’s part of what makes her Velma to begin with, and helps her stand out. Nicole Jaffe, Pat Stevens, BJ Ward, Christina Lange (PNSD), Mindy Cohn, Kate Micucci, Linda Cardellini -heck, even Haley Kiyoko from ‘The Mystery Begins’ and Sarah Gilman from the ‘Daphne and Velma’ movie understood this! They all had that nasal twang to their voice - differing between actresses, of course, but still recognizable as Velma. Gina Rodriguez though? Honestly, it just sounds like she’s acting it straight. Not bad acting at all, by any means - she just doesn’t sound like Velma, and doesn’t seem to be trying to. (Honestly wondering if she was only hired bc she voices Carmen Sandiego in the reboot cartoon for the lolz fun reference! type connection) 

Daphne is sort of similar in voices, but hers is more of a pitch her voice hits - Heather North, Mary Kay Bergman, and Grey Delisle Griffin all have that pitch they hit naturally when speaking. Amanda Seyfried? Does not - in fact, her voice is actually deeper than I was expecting - but it’s not quite as big a difference as it is for Velma. It fits her character type okay, and she does well with it overall.  

And finally, the most controversial one: Will Forte’s Shaggy. 

I’ll go ahead and say this: he’s not Scott Menville levels of bad Shaggy voice acting. If I were to place him on a list, I’d probably put him around Billy West level - kind of sounds similar via vocal tics (voice cracking, likes and zoinks, etc), but his own voice just overtakes the impression he’s seeking to hit. When I hear him speak, I don’t really hear Shaggy; I just hear Will Forte trying to do an impression of Shaggy. 

In comparison: when Scott Innes took over for Shaggy, it was like Casey Kasem’s, just a touch more of a twang to his voice and just a dash over-the-top - but it was still Shaggy, and you didn’t doubt that for a minute.

Same thing for Lillard, but maybe moreso - he was pretty much the most perfect casting for a live-action Shaggy there could be at the time Scooby Doo (2002) was made. Him taking over for Kasem from there made perfect sense: he was honestly the best cast Mystery Inc member of the live-actions, and a lot more recognizable to the general public as Shaggy than Scott Innes was. He could also do different emotions with Shaggy that not a lot of the other voice actors had the chance to do (mainly bc script), so for future stuff they have that flexibility, if they wanted to play around a little more. 

With any luck Forte will get better over the course of the movie, but honestly the casting could have been so much better with Matt Lillard and Kate Micucci. 

----

Shaggy Rogers, evading taxes since 2020

----

siMON COWELL??!? 

WHAT THE

WHY?!?!?

ALSO HIS CHARACTER DESIGN STYLE IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FROM THE REST OF THE GANG WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON?!!?

IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE THE SD CELEBRITY CAMEO

LIKE

IF YOU WERE GOING TO DO A CAMEO FROM AMERICAN IDOL WHY NOT RYAN SEACREST 

HE TOOK OVER FOR CASEY KASEM ON THE AMERICAN TOP 40 WOULDN’T THAT MAKE MORE SENSE

aaauuuggghhh

---

Also he’s there as a potential investor in Mystery Inc as a detective agency

A music industry professional… is interested in funding a detective agency.

Like… did he miss out on Josie & the Pussycats? Is that why he’s here?

----

Wait a minute

Oh noooooo

I know why he’s here

I remember this spoiler

Shit

-----

And once again, here is your reminder to tell Simon Cowell a great big fcuk you

Only this time it’s for making Shaggy and Scooby feel worthless and saying that friendship is worthless and cannot be counted on for anything worthwhile

Simon Cowell: Professional Dickhead

---

Welp, at least this gives a solid reason why they leave: Simon Cowell was being a professional dickhead, and the gang didn’t really say anything against him or interrupt him on his whole ‘Shag and Scoob are worthless spiel’

Or, well... Daphne stepped up some, but more to say ‘they’re our friends!’ rather than ‘that’s entirely wrong, our friends aren’t worthless!’ Better than nothing, but yeesh

----

Ahhh, Takamoto Bowling - the emptiest bowling alley in the evenings this side of Coolsville 

(no seriously, the past few times my dad has taken my sister and me bowling pre-pandemic, no matter the day or time? it’s ALWAYS got more than 6 lanes of people there, what the heck)

Also Scooby wears three bowling shoes, which honestly makes more sense than I thought it would - that pup goes spinning and sliding every which way on a normal floor, bowling alley floors would be like ten times worse

----

here’s a nice little detail - when Scooby sees one of the bowling pins peek out with red eyes and he yells that to Shaggy, Shaggy actually squints and walks closer to see if it actually does have eyes

aww

----

Huh, okay 

Panicked Will Forte Shaggy actually sounds more like a good Shaggy voice than normal talking Will Forte Shaggy

I can dig it

---

Still kind of underwhelmed by the Shag and Scoob disguise scene - wouldn’t it make more sense to have them like, dish up hot sauce or something on a plate that nonsensically makes the robots overheat before they discover their ruse?

Idk, maybe they’re off their game after Simon ‘Dickhead’ Cowell

---

Carlton Way - must be named after Fred’s only other voice actor, Carlton Stevens of PNSD

Also Hanna’s Barber Shop is next to Barbera’s Pizza! Cute.

And… Pitstop’s Pink Perfume ad. Wait, who is that? *assorted googling noises*

...ahhh, Penelope Pitstop from Wacky Races! Who, according to Wikipedia, was revealed to have Greek ancestry in the 2016 Wacky Raceland comic book, having been born on the island of Aegina

Now I’m wondering if we’ll see her in this too, given Cerberus...

----

Honestly kind of fascinating to see the gang with a police radio in their van

Also fascinating to see that only main characters are allowed clothing variety and texture/creases/folds

---

it’s actually really sweet to see Fred, upon hearing that Shag and Scoob are likely in danger, immediately makes a 90 degree turn in traffic

---

It looks like they changes Dee Dee’s name a hair - now it’s Dee Dee Skyes, instead of Sykes

It works well for the Falcon aesthetic, so that’s cool

----

Shaggy, after Dee Dee tells them that Dastardly’s trying to kill them: Scoob, someone thinks we’re important enough to *mimes slitting throat*!

Scooby: It’s nice to be wanted.

Excellent! This movie has captured Shag and Scoob’s blasé attitude towards death! Now we’re onto a solid Scooby film :D

Dee Dee: Hmm, I hear that!

And they even have a friend to share in their attitude! Splendid!

----

Christ, I can work photoshop better than Blue Falcon can, and I don’t even know how to use photoshop

I will give major kudos on his costume tho - it maintains the important elements of the OG Falcon, while still updating it with more bird-related aesthetic, like the feathered appearance of parts of his costume, the split cape resembling the tail feathers, and the talon gauntlets & boots. neat!

---

Yooo, Dynomutt, I thought secret identities were still a thing with Superheroes, what the hey are you doing giving it out to a duo you literally just picked up behind a bowling alley

Ngl, I’m kinda hoping we get some scenes where Dynomutt messes up a little like in the OG cartoon - this one feels really serious, which is kind of strange

---

Okay now I want to see older!Blue Falcon come in for a cameo

Mainly bc I’m getting the feeling that this one is a major dumbass, and not in the fun and friendly himbo kind of way 😑

---

Wait, THAT’S our first look at Dastardly? That’s a bit abrupt, isn’t it?

Also his ship must be pumping thousands of gallons of toxins into the air, that smoke cloud looks hideous. Forget logging into his mom’s Netflix account like the trailer said, EPA should probably be hunting him for sport with a laser cannon, jesus fcuking christ

---

Honestly kinda want a plane you can pilot like a motorbike now

---

Welp, it looks like we have a fun, mustache-twirly, puns-aplenty, loves-to-be-bad kind of villain on our hands folks! This is gonna be FUN AS HECK

---

Eurgh, this scene - the super-stiff-but-stretched-out ‘yeeurgh’ faces really squick me for some reason, but I can’t really pinpoint why

---

I have decided I highly dislike the Brian Blue Falcon, or Brian Falcon for short, and would like to see Dastardly tie him to some railroad tracks

---

North St for Heather North, and… wait… Funland Carnival? Like where Charlie the Robot hung out?

Apparently that’s in Romania.

A very yellow-greenfilter Romania at that.

 Like, I’ve seen blue washes on movies trying to portray evening in the middle of the day so they don’t actually have to shoot at night, but yellow? That’s normally used for deserts and hot days and uhhh 

NOT for evenings in a country with landscape like THIS

odd

(I mean I guess they got the mountains and trees right, but still. Yellow filters make a place look arid, which Romania is Not, to my knowledge)

----

Dude, Brian Falcon is such an idiot even Shaggy and Scooby, commonly portrayed as the idiots of Mystery Inc, look at him like he’s a moron.

(They are Not Amused.)

Also Brian Falcon is an absolute coward. That’s new. Even Shaggy and Scooby face off against the robots directly in a Whack-a-Mole game and destroy some. Dude, get your head in the fcuking game already, yikes

--

Woah, Laff-a-Lympics, Wacky Races, Hex Girls, The Banana Splits, Penelope Pitstop, Space Stars, Posse Impossible, and Hong Kong Phooey easter eggs in one shot

Geezus

--- 

Another nice moment: when cornered by Dastardly, Shaggy moves to stand in front of Scooby to protect him

---

Dastardly (to Shaggy): I don’t care about YOU. You’re not REMOTELY important!

*proceeds to shoot Shaggy THROUGH the ceiling and up into the highest car on a Ferris Wheel where Brian Falcon is hiding like a man baby*

Welp, so much for a fun and zany villain. Time for this Plush Anon to kill a bitch *cocks shotgun*

I will, too - kudos to the animators for hurting me so badly with the face Shaggy made right before being shot because

OW

---

Ehehehhehe, yess, the infamous ‘Dick’ scene

Dastardly: No, I’m a DICK. With a D!

You sure are, you sack of dildos with a D!

This scene had to be put in on purpose - if this had been released in theaters, I just know the adults would be dying in laughter 🤣🤣🤣

----

Shaggy: Brian, do something! 

Brian Falcon: Like what?

Shaggy: Like, drop some F-Bombs!

love it 😂

---

Is it like movie law now, that if there’s an action scene with a Ferris Wheel in the background, it has to fall off and roll down a mild incline like a wheel? Because it kinda feels like it

---

Aha! Dastardly said his drats! Perfection.

Now to shoot him through a ceiling to make them matter even more :D

---

OOF. 

Well that hurt. 

Poor Shaggy - basically internalizing now that he’s the worthless one and weak link of the group now that Scooby is considered more important

---

Holy fcuk I’m crying

Shaggy just broke Brian Falcon down to his deepest insecurities without even trying while talking to him

He even used the words ‘imposter syndrome’ 

Shaggy hon, you’re the best

----

Oh hey, Fred, Daphne, and Velma! It’s been a while since we saw you guys again, what are you doing?

Arguing about the metric system and realizing that Shaggy and Scooby reminding them to eat periodically helped them keep a clearer head...

And using the word ‘hangry’.

But then looking through a ridiculously cute photo album of the two and a video the gang took together (the video is honestly really heckin’ cute, 10000/10 would recommend)...

And then getting pulled over so Fred can have a brief ‘oo-la-la’ montage about the pretty blonde cop who honest-to-gods looks like a Barbie doll.

Where Daphne then describes how ugly Dastardly is...

Right before the petite blonde cop who’s maybe like 5’7” at best rips off her outfit to reveal it was Dick Dastardly this entire time, all 7ish feet of him.

And then kidnaps them all along with the Mystery Machine while he makes terribly fun dorky puns

…

...SO BACK TO SCOOBY AND SHAGGY...

---

...where Scooby is making kissy faces in the mirror while wearing his Blue Falcon uniform

Hrm, that’s not really better is it

We actually see Shaggy reading (OG) Blue Falcon’s autobiography, and making hurt but snide comments about Scooby’s ego

Which are actually pretty clever tbh

-----

Cooooooongratulations, Fred Jones! You are now officially a full-on himbo!

----

Alas, poor Daphne. While your knowledge of the tropes of your show might have served you well in other places, this was to be a theatrical release once upon a time, and so such knowledge falls to ruin.

----

You know, I just realized - we’re never really told HOW the Cerberus skulls work, both in how each skull can be used to find the others,  and, presumably, in releasing Cerberus itself. We’re given a brief glance-over of Scooby’s ancestry (and I mean REALLY damn brief), and a quick mention that these are supposed to be Cerberus’ skulls being stolen, but… that’s it. Nothing else is given. 

Now, I read the first few chapters of my SCOOB! Junior Novelization, and it actually went into further detail about the skulls themselves and what Dastardly’s initial plan was early in the book - open the gates of Hades and obtain the seas of treasure therein. It acted as an introduction both to the climatic endgame we’ll face at the end of the movie, and to Dastardly, who uses the same disguise trick he used as the Barbie cop when he stole the first one in South America. 

(They actually DID plan to use this as Dastardly’s intro, but cut this… 3 minute scene for time. Yeah. See below video for the details - honestly think they should have kept it in. Saves time later and definitely more show than tell, compared to what we got)

I feel like that would be a better introduction to him than the one we got - hell, it would have fit in quite neatly after the revamped theme song montage. They could have the scene with Dastardly finding/stealing the first skull as an introduction (as above), then have him answer a call or something. Exposit openly “You found the key! Excellent! Now where are we going next?” 

THEN cut to the diner/coffee shop scene we had earlier. We still wouldn’t know exactly what the key was/entailed off the bat, and they could still have FD&V find out on their own - maybe by hacking the little robot instead? IDK.

---

The final skull is on Messick Mountain.

Cute.

On a side note, I do love how Dastardly’s ship interior looks - very dieselpunk

---

Velma just hacked into Dynomutt… somehow, and I finally get my wacky Dynomutt shenanigans!  Hazoo!

...sadly that was really dang brief. Realistic, yes, but still too brief. 

---

Eyyyy, we finally get the whys of why Scooby is needed! … really dang fast. 

Also Fred says Jinkies. 

----

Hey, Muttley popped up! In a shrine… to his demise… that we find out he reached when Dastardly pushed him forward into the Underworld to steal the treasure of Alexander the Great in a portal he rigged up… only for both of them to find out it was a one-way deal unless they used the key to be able to come back. The key, of course, being Scooby Doo, descendent of Peritas, Alexander’s dog. 

Eh, workable enough-ish. It’s interesting to see that Dastardly, despite how much he disliked Muttley in the older cartoons, still cares about him to a certain extent. 

---

Pfff, Fred’s a poor man’s Hemsworth XD

---

Sweet, we’re in ‘Journey to the Center of the Earth’ now!

---

Um

O W W W

You guys really had to do the ‘me or them’ thing with Shaggy and Scooby… and tHeN hAvE sCoObY cHoOsE tHe FaLcONs?!? Just because they said he was important as “the key” and gave him a spandex costume.

Over at least 7 years of friendship. 

Booooooooooooo

---

actually no I’m Not Done Yet

This whole scene is a mess.

Like

Shaggy’s turn was really dang fast… but I can still see how he gets to it. It’s at least a day between Scooby being chosen as a pseudo-sidekick and the island arrival, during which Shaggy’s talk with the main adult (who has taken up the mantle of his favorite superhero) essentially confirms his feelings of worthlessness and leaves him to stew for HOURS on end (on top of another adult, Dastardly, who also calls him “not even REMOTELY important” at the carnival before freaKING SHOOTING HIM THROUGH THE CEILING NO I AM NOT OVER THIS). Tie that to a teenager who also believes his only friends have come to think he’s meaningless baggage, and suddenly his entire support system is vanishing underneath him to one of his former idols without ANY sign of hesitation from Scooby’s part (with the exception of the collar scene, but I don’t think that that means the same to Scooby, given how quickly he bounces back)

Scooby tho… hrm. It could be that he’s clinging to the good feelings Brian Falcon inspires in him (by choosing him as the next possible Dynomutt), as a way to overpower how FD&V hurt him, while also building on how he came to love the duo because SHAGGY loved them so much. But the movie doesn’t frame that up… at all?? At least compared to Shaggy. 

Idk, maybe I’m missing something, but this scene is a mess through and through

Boooooo

----

Scooby: *tries to leap into Brian Falcon’s arms like he did with Shaggy but falls*

Brian: Uh, what are you doing?

Scooby: Rhaggy never missed. 

Damn straight he didn’t

---

oh hey, it’s Captain Caveman

I was wondering when we’d see him.

---

AAAUUGGHH

It’s that blink-and-you’ll-miss-it scene from the trailers I sobbed over - the one with Shaggy holding Scooby’s collar

Fun fact it actuALLY FADES INTO THE FLASHBACK

THAT WAS NOT A TRAILER THING THAT’S ACTUALLY HERE IN THE MOVIE

OW

---

Oh No

Fred is here, alone, after that whole scene with Dastardly saying he had a use for Fred

...while that’s likely Dastardly in a Fred suit (that sounds creepy just typing it), I’m still going to enjoy this brief but absolutely lovely hug Shaggy and Fred share...

(seriously tho, look at this, it’s a genuinely close, squish-your-lungs-out kind of hug, I love it)

...as well as Shaggy, who's still hurt from his fight with Scooby, immediately gearing up to go help him after hearing Dastardly’s trying to kidnap him.

----

Brian Falcon and Scooby Doo now have to take on Captain Caveman in gladiatorial combat in order to claim the final skull of Cerberus

I love cartoons sometimes

----

Captain Caveman just put the smackdown on Brian Falcon and punched him into the ground up to his CHEST

Then smacked him so far into a wall he cracked the stone around him!

GodDAMN is this satisfying 😆 altho minor question here: how did he gain the rank of Captain? Do cavepeople have a naval force?

---

He just whirled Scooby around his head, then spun him so fast his costume broke off

I may have to look into some Captain Caveman stuff now, that’s fantastic

---

Shaggy and Fred - sorry, “Fred” -  just smashed through to the colosseum in the Mystery Machine

And Dynomutt just fired missiles at Captain Caveman to smash him into an Amigara-shaped hole of himself

I REALLY love cartoons sometimes

---

Oh No

Just as Shaggy starts trying to apologize, “Fred” kicks him in the back, rips off his disguise to normal Dastardly self, and kidnaps Scooby atop the skull, before revealing he destroyed the Falcon Fury jet

New tagline for this movie? Shaggy Rogers and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

...at least the rest of the gang is back together?

---

Brian Falcon: *Immediately tries to blame Shaggy for inadvertently leading Dastardly to them, while storming up to get in his face*

Fred: *upon realizing BrianF is blaming Shaggy for everything, without a SINGLE moment’s hesitation, immediately leaps in to defend Shaggy and physically push back Brian Falcon several feet*

We stan one Himbo, theydies and gentlethem

Also?

Velma (sneering): What kind of hero blames other people for his problems? *Walks over to comfort Shaggy with Daphne, while Shaggy looks dumbfounded they’re defending him bc he also blames himself for Scooby’s kidnapping*

This. This right here, is the kind of Mystery gang content I wanna see.

I don’t care how the rest of this movie goes now, this scene right here is ambrosia to the Scooby fan’s soul, and therefore makes this entire movie worth it, outdated memes, lingo, and all

---

Cackling rn - Fred and Brian Falcon are in a point-off a la the Spiderman meme 😂

or, more specifically, the post-credits sequence of Spiderverse where they’re arguing about who started pointing first

It gets better when Velma and Daphne try to pull each other off of their pushing fight, and Velma grumbles “Toxic Masculinity” I’m crying

---

WOAH

More super Shaggy stuff here (apart from being flung through a building roof without a scratch) - he pushes apart both groups effortless, and even knocks them back several feet

If we estimate Dynomutt as… we’ll say 450 since he’s made of metal, Falcon at 220, Dee Dee at 160, that’s about 830 lbs on one side

Then Fred, Daphne and Velma on the other (hmm, 180, 150, 130?) would be around 460 lbs

Dang boi

---

Oh honey no, it’s not your fault

But dang if he didn’t get a good message from it, one I’ve done my best to transcribe here:

“I was afraid that... things were gonna change. And they did change. But like, that’s okay! People can grow. But it doesn’t mean that we’re growing apart. Because the one thing that will never change is that Scooby Doo is my best friend! Ten years ago, a little boy made a promise to a stray puppy that he’d never leave him no matter what. And I’m gonna keep that promise! Now it’s time we stopped that mustachioed menace from opening the gates to the {underworld} and letting loose that fearsome {Cerberus}. So what do you say we get out {of here}, and go get my always-snacking, never-lacking, often-napping dog back? Who’s with me?”

Honestly not a bad message for kids. Things will change, people will change, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop being friends. (Obvs real life exceptions apply, but that’s not a bad note honestly)

...shame that that conclusion comes right the FUCK outta nowhere

Like

How, exactly, did he come to this conclusion? WHEN? What inspired him to realize this, what was the impetus for this specific line of thought, that it’s okay for friends to change?

It kinda feels like this should have been either the happy ending speech given after they’ve saved the world, or one at the start of the third act, like if Shaggy arrives when Scooby thinks he’s chased him away and ruined everything, and Shaggy & the gang still save him. And Scooby asks him why he did that - when Scooby tried to change himself to fit what Brian Falcon wanted, instead of treasuring the friend he still had, or maybe why Shaggy reacted the way he did. THEN Shaggy gives the speech we hear, a la:

“I yelled at you because… like, because I was scared. I was scared that... things were gonna change. And they did change. But like, that’s okay! People can grow. But it doesn’t mean that we’re growing apart. Because the one thing that will never change is that YOU’RE my best friend! Ten years ago, a little boy made a promise to a stray puppy that he’d never leave him no matter what. And I mean to keep it!” 

At least that would make a little more sense to me. Again, not a bad speech, but a little rearranging would help to really hit home. 

---

Okay, now we’re back with Dastardly in Greece, and suddenly the background people all look MILES better than the ones at the start of the movie. Did they just forget to polish the first two minutes of film, what the heck?

Also, Dastardly’s ship is literally the entire length of the Greek ruins presented o_O

---

HOLY SHIT THE SKULLS TURNED BACK TIME AND MADE THE RUINS INTO AN ENTIRELY RESTORED PALACE WITH THE GATES OF THE UNDERWORLD BEFORE THEM

They’re also colored a very atmospheric neon arrangement that’s surprisingly quite tasteful ^.^

----

The Mystery Machine can fly now!!! eeheeheeeheeheeheeheeee

----

And so we finally see Cerberus, a massive, towering figure with sharp teeth and pffffffhahahhahaa why are all three heads wearing Spartan helmets

To its credit, they’re also wearing basic body armor, wrist guards, tail spikes, etc, but the helmets are killing me 🤣 who thought to stick that onto the dog? Did Hades forget to remove the armor after winning the Gods’ Pet Costume Contest, or was it like that horse in the ATV costume - it felt safer so it didn’t let anyone take it off?

Or was this a precaution against Herakles coming back? These are questions - hilarious, hilarious questions 😁

---

Awww. Scooby immediately runs to the battered Mystery Machine to rip the doors open for the gang!

And… wait. THIS is where that wonderful hug was in the trailers? I thought that was at the end of the movie when everyone was safe!

This now does not bode well. But we’ll worry about that later. Time to enjoy this gorgeous wonderful hug of the entire gang, and Shag and Scoob apologizing to each other for fighting 🥰

Yet another scene to make the rest of this movie worth the rest

(halfway wanna frame this shit and put it on the wall, it’s that lovely)

----

Fantastic! Dastardly is now in Hell, where I’ve been wishing him this entire movie! :D

And dang… he actually apologizes to what he believes is a dead Muttley. Who is, naturally, snickering at all of this. The two bicker predictably, but eventually hug and make up, too happy to see each other to resort to old habits. Honestly a nice little scene, all-in-all. 

---

Back to the gang and they’re doing the glowy eyes in the dark bit! I actually haven’t seen that in a Scooby movie forever, it’s neat.

Also Fred is now going full Liam Neeson over his van, war paint and all, using the tire cover as a shield and… holy shit. 

HOLY SHIT

THE ASCOT IS BAAAnnnnnd it’s gone. Boy, that was… short. 

Fred just ran full-tilt at Cerberus, screaming like a mad man, before getting flicked away by its big toe, and losing the ascot and makeshift shield. It punched so hard his facepaint came off

It was fun while it lasted y’all

---

Heyyy, Shag and Scoob just came up with the plan, and it’s actually solid! I’m so proud, and so is the rest of the gang! Also willingly going to distract Cerberus while the rest figure out how to close the gate and stuff Cerberus back in

I love my boys 😊

---

Annnnd there goes Brian Falcon like the coward he is

To… call his dad? And admit he isn’t a hero.

Only for Dynomutt to point out Shaggy and Scooby are taking him on and are terrified. 

This then cuts to Shaggy and Scooby running around in a chariot and gladiator wear, running back and forth a la the door gag from Cerberus to the OG SDWAY theme

I think I love this movie

(although they’re hinting at Dynomutt being resentful of OG Blue Falcon essentially abandoning him to his incompetent son, and I really wish it had been touched upon more

that’s actually rather heartbreaking, when you stop to think about it, and there’s a lot that could be done with an additional two minutes of screentime) 

---

Huh, another good message for kids: it’s okay to fail and be scared, so long as you keep going and try to do what’s right.

Two good messages for kids in one movie. Not too shabby, on the whole. 

---

Brian Falcon just flew in and punched the three-headed dog, then jumped into its mouth as it tried to eat Scooby, resisted the MASSIVE JAW STRENGTH, and got them out of there safe and sound

Finally, something heroic!

-- 

I was wondering where Dastardly and Muttley got off to - apparently they’re off to take a money bath.

Aight

---

Shag and Scoob have now convinced the Rotten Robots to turn into bowling balls to knock Cerberus off their feet a la the classic marbles pratfall back into the underworld

That is a sentence I just wrote

----

OH FCUK NO

NO

ABSOLUTELY NOT NO

YOU ARE TELLING US THAT AFTER ALL OF THIS - ALL OF THIS - ONE OF THEM HAS TO STAY IN THE UNDERWORLD TO LOCK THE GATE

THAT OCTOBER LEAKER WAS RIGHT WHAT THE HELL

LITERALLY SO

I mean i know its a kids film specifically Scooby Doo so happy ending but what the literal FUCK

---

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGHHH

SHAGGY NOOOO

“Buddy, back when we were kids, you saved me. Now, it’s my turn.”

and he dOES THIS WHILE HOLDING SCOOBY’S HEAD TENDERLY IN HIS HANDS

AND WHEN EVERYTHING REVERTS IT’S JUST RUBBLE AND RUIN AND SCOOBY’S LEFT SOBBING OPENLY AT NOTHING

AND THE GANG ALL COME TO CLING AT HIM AND CRY OVER THEIR FRIEND WHO THOUGHT HE WAS WORTHLESS MOST OF THE MOVIE AND THOUGH THAT THE GANG THOUGHT THE SAME ABOUT HIM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH

---

WELP, TIME TO COPE WITH INAPPROPRIATE HUMOR

Shaggy: I yelled at my dog, got him kidnapped, and ended up helping the bad guy to open the gates to Hell. Guess I’ll die. 

Dee Dee: Well actually, this is more Dastardly’s fault because -

Shaggy, yelling as he slams his hand against the lock: GUESS I’LL DIE!!!

----

Ah, so the writers wrote themselves into a corner, and the only way out was a Deus Ex Machina (at least, I think I’m using that term correctly…) 

Because to get Shaggy back, a giant statue of Alexander the Great and Peritas appears out of nowhere - literally, since it definitely wasn’t there before - with an inscription Scooby has to read to get Shaggy back.

This would have been a lot more effective if we’d seen it when Dastardly arrived in Greece - maybe even as the marker for where the gate to the Underworld was. Have Alexander facing one way, and Peritas facing the other. You open the gate on Alexander’s side, and come home on Peritas’ side. Having this unfold into the gate gives it more purpose than “magically appears right the fcuk outta nowehere” and you could have a pun with the “backdoor” escape. Everybody wins!

And if that’s too good for ya, how about a brief lingering shot by it at some point as Dastardly flies into Greece, behind where the gate materializes, or directly across from it on the plaza? Maybe have one of the gang kick it after Shaggy leaves, and say ‘This is all your fault! Why would you make something like this?’

It’d still be a magical contrivance, but at least it would make some fcuking SENSE.

(Granted it DID lead to this hilariously ominous shot, so maybe I shouldn’t complain:)

---

Velma: I finally figured out what you guys are! You’re the heart of Mystery Inc.

Me: YEAH BABY! *flips over table* I’VE BEEN SAYING THAT SHIT FOR YEARS AND NOW, I’M FCUKING VALIDATED AT LAAAAAAAAST!

----

Shaggy: *rips off Dastardly’s face to reveal…*

ALL: SIMON COWELL??!?

Me, choking on food: I’m sorry WHAT?!?!?

Velma: *takes off mask again to reveal*

ALL: DICK DASTARDLY?!?

Dastardly: Drat! No one ever goes for the double unmasking. 

So I was right all along - Simon Cowell truly was a Dick this entire time.

-----

And so we close on the gang unveiling a Mystery Machine paint job on their official detective agency building, Brian Falcon living the good life as the DJ at their party, the Falcon team gifting a sleek new Mystery Machine to the gang (which honestly looks pretty unique - it’s not the classic, but it is something new that isn’t awful, so kudos there), and the gang on their way to another mystery.

So, at the end of the day is this a good Scooby movie? 

Meh? *waves hand in meh motion* But it definitely had its moments. 

This Scooby film is flawed as heck, no doubt about it - the plot has a MAJOR problem with telling instead of showing, some parts feeling out of order or WAY too short, and of course the deus ex machina ending. I honestly would have loved some more time for their first mystery as kids, where we actually got more character moments/bonding from Fred, Daphne, and Velma as they solved it the more traditional route, as well as not framing FD&V as super duper mystery solvers right off the bat??? 

The stuff with Blue Falcon isn’t AWFUL, per se, but it is ridiculously satisfying to see him get smacked around. Captain Caveman was honestly one of the funniest bits in the movie, same with Dynomutt. 

As far as the character stuff? It all felt fairly natural, progression-wise. Shag and Scoob don’t have this big break-up with the gang - they’re hurt by the literal Dickhead’s comments the gang don’t speak up against, and go to blow off some steam together. Shag and Scoob don’t have this giant blow-up argument - it builds over the film into a hurt spat they both recognize they overreacted to almost immediately. The gang (FDV) go looking for them almost as soon as they leave, and, upon hearing they’re in danger, turn and head towards them to save them, realizing how important the two are to Mystery Inc along the way. They defend each other, help each other, have some of the Best Dang Animated Mystery Inc hugs I ever did see - THIS feels more like the Gang I’ve been waiting for forever to come back to DTV (and in a rough sense, did). While I do wish we’d gotten more screen time of FD&V, what we got wasn’t too bad. 

Weirdly enough, at the end of the day, I’ve actually grown more accustomed to Forte’s Shaggy - it feels like it fits this different style a touch more than I originally thought, and holy hell if I didn’t come close to tears at that ending gate scene, he knocked that one out of the park.  Velma still doesn’t feel much like Velma, but I did get used to it by the end. I kept cracking up at Efron’s Fred, and no complaints on Seyfried’s Daphne.

Jason Isaacs as Dick Dastardly absolutely killed it. Blue Falcon Crew was okay (excepting Mark “The Racist” Wahlburg - it was just him talking, no real effort. You could recognize Wahlburg right off the bat, acting as a goofy douche) and freaking Captain Caveman was awesome. Apparently they combined both Billy West and Don Messick’s recordings for Muttley (awesome!!!), so this may very well be Don Messick’s final role in a Scooby Doo film. 

It got off to a rough start, but ended well enough. The animation was solid, the writing has some unexpectedly clever and funny moments sprinkled throughout, with some pretty fun action sequences on the side. Watching this, I really do believe that the people working on it love Scooby Doo and all things Hanna-Barbera… at least in their own way. 

I ended up buying this instead of just renting it ($5 more, why not) and I am honestly glad I did so. Despite its flaws, it has some great moments with the gang as friends, and I have been Craving That Shit for DECADES

And if these writers/directors ever did another Scooby film? I think I’d be up for giving them a chance - at least so long as we got some more absolutely BEAUTIFUL hugs with the gang

I hope you enjoyed this stream-of-consciousness reaction to SCOOB! (2020)... a whole ass year LATER, admittedly (I didn’t switch my Save Post to Queue, curse my hubris), but hopefully y’all’ve been entertained. Good night everybody!

[spooky-z]

College Françoise Dupont’s talent show [4.1/5]

• 1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 4.1 • 5 • 5.1 •

I put links on Mari, Chlo and Kami's clothes because I suck in description. It has a link to the ring too.

@ozmav @maribat-archive

The big night had come.

Nervous, Damian had been sitting on the Dupain-Cheng's couch since arriving with his family.

The whole Wayne family inside the little house waiting for Marinette to finish getting ready with Chloe's help.

He already felt suffocated even though everyone was scattered around the house.

Bruce talked quietly with Tom, Sabine and Alfred looking at old family albums (Dupain-Cheng), Jason and Tim playing Mecha Strike, Dick with Kori on the couch with Damian, trying to calm down the brunette.

“Damian, calm down, man. I know how you are feeling right now, really, I've been through this. Trust me, everything will be perfect. She'll say yes.” He puts his hand on his shoulder in comfort. “There's no way Minette can refuse. That girl is crazy about you and you know it.”

"Surprisingly. For a while I thought she had a screw less." Kori adds solemnly.

"Kori..." Dick scolds.

But Damian ignored them both, as the hatch in Marinette's bedroom opened softly and Chloe came down, in a long, tight transparent dress with sapphire blue details all along (which looked like lace), a small belt of the same color to accentuate the slim waist.

Her hair was tied in a high, princess-style bun and the makeup on her face was minimal, the only highlight being the black cat eyeliner.

Damian couldn't see her feet from the dress, but he was sure she wore a heel of at least four inches.

He gets up quickly from the couch.

“Go Wayne, Tikkie is distracting her. This is your chance.” She says as he reaches the bottom of the stairs, “Don't ruin things. Remember: Kami will be on the neighboring roof on the left, ready for when it's time.”

“Okay.” And he climbs the stairs quickly, barely hearing the others wishing for luck.

He passed Marinette's room, which was practically empty, not sparing a second and up the stairs leading to the bed, then up the hatch.

The sight that greeted him as he climbed up was breathtaking.

The balcony was decorated with fairy lights, the vines with blooming roses, and the clear sky, sprinkled with stars.

Marinette never lived up to the nickname angel as much as she did that night.

She was divine in a sapphire blue dress (she, Chloe and Kagami would go with the pieces she had made for her debut) of lightweight fabric (which resembled Diana's suit and the Amazon or Greek gods), her legs naked every time she moved and the top with a triangular neckline supported by a kind of belt decorated with beads, two or three shades darker than the dress.

To complement the Greek theme, she wore blue lace-up heels.

Her hair (which had grown so long it almost reached her waist) was shaped into loose curls, framing her small face. A thin golden tiara in the middle of the head.

Her makeup was a little more flashy than Chloe's. In addition to the baby blue cat eyeliner around the eyes, there was a dark cherry tone to her lips. Highlighting them.

Damian felt his mouth dry.

“Look at the time! I have to… go, Chloe is calling me!” Tikki before disappearing downstairs.

"What-Tikki!" Marinette called. She mouthed to say something more, but stopped when she noticed Damian.

“You look stunning, Marinette. Wonderful.” He says coming out of his stupor, but still frozen in place.

"You look wonderful too, Dami." She approaches, the lights making her more surreal. "I still think Chloe exaggerated a little..."

Damian finally moves, catching her halfway. His hands automatically reaching her face, stroking softly.

“So… are you going to tell me why our friends and parents have been weird lately? Something tells me you know why.” She says quietly, her face slightly tilted so she can look him in the eye. Despite her high heels, she barely reached his nose.

He placed a small kiss on her forehead before pulling back and kissing her on the lips quickly.

“Marinette, Angel. When I met you, I didn't think we could get to where we are now. Meet you, meet Ladybug, your parents, your friends... It was the best thing that ever happened in my life.” He says softly “In two years together, we had so many good, amazing, bad, worrying moments… But nothing managed to shake what we have. I'm here, I still love you, maybe even more than in the beginning and I intend to have you with me until I can no longer. I want to be by your side always. Be fighting crime or just deciding whether to eat pizza or dine out, then-” Marinette, who smiled sweetly, widened her eyes as Damian knelt before her.

“Damian what-” she choked out as he pulled a small black velvet box out of his jacket pocket.

"Marinette Dupain-Cheng, would you give me the honor of becoming my wife?" He opened the small box showing the ring.

The ring was a pink gold, a larger diamond in the center and four smaller ones around. Marinette was in love.

“Dami! My God! Damian!” She sobbed “Of course! I do! I love you so much!!” And pulled the brunette to kiss the life out of him.

"I can't believe it... God, I love you." she says as she steps back.

“I love you too, Angel. You're my life.” He whispered. “Here, give me your right hand.”

She pulled back and reached out, her manicured nails painted in a nude tone, her heart beating so fast and hard that she could feel the pulse of blood in her ears.

Damian slid until the ring fit comfortably on the finger.

Marinette admired the ring, still not believing. She was engaged. Bride of the person she loved. She didn't know she could be any happier. Damian pulled her back in a kiss.

“Sabine, she accepted! They are kissing now! Ahh my little girl is getting married!” The two are startled by Tom's loud voice and turned in time to see Sabine pulling her husband back to Marinette's room. Tikki in his head with a dreamy smile.

The movement on the roof of the house also caught their attention.

“DAD?” Damian calls incredulously. “Tim? Wait- Why is everyone on the roof? Even Kori!” Noting that his father was not alone.

Marinette starts laughing when Bruce nods in approval and disappears into the shadows taking the four (Tim, Jason, Dick and Kori) with him.

Tsukuyomi on the next roof, also leaves leaving the two alone.

"... So I think I'll need help getting down with those heels and the dress." Marinette says breaking the moment "I may not be the clumsy 13-year-old, but I don't want to test my luck."

Damian smiles mischievously before scooping her up.

"Lucky for you I came prepared." And he jumped with her toward the limo parked in front of the bakery.

“Damian!!!”

••••••

Lila was absolutely furious. If Hawkmoth was still active, she would have been akumatized at least four times.

She still couldn't believe Adrien had the courage to reject and push her in front of everyone. In front of Dupain-Cheng.

The mayor's daughter's despicable laugh still echoing in her ears and the class's incredulous expression glued to her eyes.

She had arrived early at the theater to avoid any questioning of the idiots. She was also hiding in one of the entrance pillars watching the doors trying to catch any glimpse of Adrien.

There were few people, but the situation was changing ever closer to the school schedule.

Last night she had a plan to get the blonde to apologize for what he had done in front of everyone, thus clearing her path with the class. And if by chance the plan resulted in everyone pitying her and forcing both of them together (perhaps breaking the baker's daughter's heart) she would not complain.

Lila had dressed to impress. A long orange chiffon dress with lace at the hem and sleeves, black heels and striking makeup. Her hair was loose.

She wanted highlight and attention. She wanted Adrien at her feet. She wanted the meticcia humiliation.

So she waited.

The first person of the class to arrive was Alix with her family. Lila wrinkled her nose at the girl's ridiculous outfit.

Who would go to an event at a prestigious venue wearing denim shorts and Jagged t-shirt?

The others were arriving not long after. No one at Alix level, but not as neat as Lila. This until Adrien appears.

The lobby was crowded with students, family, and guests, but she was still able to see him enter. His bodyguard right behind.

Even wearing a simple button-down shirt, dress pants, and polished black shoes, he could still stand out from the crowd.

Lila almost ran from her hiding place to reach him, but stopped when she saw Alya and Nino pull the blonde to talk in a far corner. Their parents and brothers right behind with the bodyguard.

"Shit."

Now she would have to wait until the last second and make a triumphant entry.

••••••

Ms. Bustier's class had found a way to meet among so many people.

The conversation went well, but a tense mood hung over them. No one brave enough to go after Adrien asking what had happened onstage the night before. No one had seen Lila yet and everyone wondered if she would still show up after the embarrassment.

All calm until it was not.

The people closest to the entrance were in a frenzy. The barely muffled whispers, some pointing, others shocked. Everyone moving closer to the doors to see whatever it was.

The class looked at each other confused trying to understand what was going on.

Kim and Ivan, the tallest in the class, followed by Adrien, tiptoed up to see the reason for the confusion, but unfortunately failed to get a good look.

Alya, who could never keep her curiosity in check, patted Kim on the shoulder to get his attention.

“Get me up. So I see and say what's going on.” She says “We won't be able to get through this crowd or see from here. ”

“Okay, I'll give you a boost and you sit on my shoulders.” He replies.

"Be careful, Aly!" Ms. Cesárie asks.

“I'm always careful, Mom!” And there was a general roll of eyes. “Now let me see wha- MY GOD THAT'S BRUCE WAYNE?!” She shouts.

Alix gives a shaken jump. “Bruce Wayne? Like Bruce Wayne? The tech mogul? This Bruce Wayne?”

"Of course! Is there another Bruce Wayne that I don't know?” Alya snapped angrily “Wait... Is that in Bruce Wayne's arms--- MARINETTE!?” She almost falls off Kim's shoulders in shock, but the boy is quick to hold her.

“Marinette?” Lila says, appearing out of nowhere beside Adrien who was still as confused as the class.

Max looks at the frowning newcomer "Why are you so..." he rethinks the word. “Dressed?” Lila might be the best girl in the world, but he couldn't help noticing that she dressed very badly. Very tacky.

She looks at him, eyebrow raised, not even trying the innocent facade, but looks back at Ladyblogger for an answer.

“Oh my god, it's true! It's Bruce Wayne with Marinette.” Alix exclaims sitting on Ivan's shoulders. “Man, I didn't know Mari was so hot.” She whistles in appreciation.

“Alix!” Rose, Nino, Adrien and Nathaniel exclaim in horror.

"What? It's true!” She replies “You should see this! Let’s go! Put me down, Ivan! We will open the Red Sea.”

The boy did as she asked, Alya who was still frozen on Kim's shoulders was poked by Nino. “Aly, let's go. Alix will try to get us there.”

She gets scared but goes down numb.

This was not the Marinette she knew.

"OK! There we go.” Alix says “Sorry! Oops It was bad!” As she pushed people out of the way, the class right behind her.

Lila and Adrien also following the rest. One out of curiosity and one... Well, Lila didn't know what else she was feeling right now except hatred and contempt.

"... And we arrived!" The girl says, her cheeks pink with the effort.

"Oh my god!" They gasp as they understand Alya's shock. And we are not talking about Bruce Wayne. By the way, it was really him.

No. The disbelief had a first and last name. Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

“Marinette…?” Adrien called, not believing his eyes.

And she, who was talking to Bruce, turned in surprise for the class. Her eyes firmed only briefly at Adrien, before turning to another person entering the hall.

He was a tall man, black-haired, well built, dressed in a black suit from head to toe, the suit obviously designer. Short hair combed and styled to the side. Green and cold eyes. His hands automatically going to Dupain-Cheng's waist as if it were normal and routine between them.

The class seemed even more surprised.

“Dad, Jason is trying to kill Tim and Dick in the car.” His voice coming out cold. “Angel, your parents were kidnapped by Jagged. Something about a tour.” Adrien notices the change in tone as he talks to the girl, the way his eyes soften and the corner of his lips curves slightly.

Bruce Wayne also seems to notice the change in behavior because he says nothing before leaving to solve the said problem.

“Is Jagged here? He didn't even warn me he was coming.” Marinette says ignoring the eyes poking holes in her head.

“It was supposed to be a surprise. I forgot-"

“Of course he forgot. That wasn't because he wanted to see you freaking out.” Kagami, who was arriving with Chloe in tow, says sarcastically. "Hello Damian, Mari." She nods.

The brunette wore an all-black suit, gold trim at the edges and sides. The jacket fully open at the front, closed just enough to cover the breasts. Her hair was artfully styled in a mess and there was a ruby lipstick on her lips.

“Kami!” Marinette jumped toward the girl. “I missed you today. Chloe used me like a doll all day. ”

“I've been busy getting everything ready.” She responds “By the way, congratulations. To both.” She adds.

"Thanks," Damian replies simply.

“Where, let me see this diamond!” Chloe pulls the brunette's hand evaluating the ring. “Wow, I didn't think Wayne would have good eyes for jewelry. Good choice.” She winks at Damian and releases the brunette's hand.

“I think it was exaggerated. It's beautiful, I loved it, but if it was a little less flashy…” Marinette doesn't finish, but the others understand what she means.

“Only the best for you, Angel.” Damian caresses her hand, then bends to kiss the ring.

Bruce returns with four other people, three men and one woman. The eldest of the three immediately jumped up to Marinette excitedly.

“What did you think of the ring, Minette?” He asks. “Damian was so concerned about not getting the proper engagement ring. You had to see it! All red and boring. He looked eleven years old again.”

What? Who were those people? Why did Marinette, Kagami and Chloe know them? And the guy who would not let go of Marinette? And Minette? Wait. Engagement Ring?

“MARINETTE GOING TO MARRY?!” Rose screams.

And the group finally looks at the class, noticing them. In Marinette's case, seeming to remember that they were there.

"Wait! Who is this guy, Marinette?! Why did I never knew you were dating someone?!" Alya sputters possessed.

Damian, already annoyed by the ladyblogger, pulls Marinette close to his family and stands in front, staring directly and coldly at the class.

"And who are you?"

“II am Ma-marinette's best friend! Alya!” She fumbles at the words.

Damian smiles humorlessly “Oh really? Interesting.” He says “Marinette and I have been together for two years and I've never heard of any Alya.”

Alya seemed to have been slapped at his words and shut up quickly, with nothing to talk about.

"You never answered the question." Lila says, taking the lead in the group. Damian raised an eyebrow in question, "Who are you?"

“Me?” His smile turns sour. “I'm Damian Wayne, fiancé of Marinette Dupain-Cheng, the one who won't think twice about crushing you if you try anything else against her… Lila Aloisi Rossi.”

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