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novembermorgon · 5 months

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Hello op tis me again!! Apologies for taking [checks notes] 84 years to get back to you I have had A Week. However!!! Cayn and Ysabel continue to live rent free <3 like I'm just so obsessed with how gothic they are which is like. My favorite thing tbh. Part of me is gratified bc everything you said I kept nodding and going yeah I thought so, because your art was so *clear* the vibes were just. So easy to read (in the best way). I THOUGHT the ring was a match with Aegon's and also rip the rat tail long live the rat tail. I have to say Ysabel haunts me but Cayn scratches an Itch. Like. U feel me? Cayn belongs squarely in Hannibal NBC with his palatable person suit that is doing very little to distract *him* from the fact that he's about to eat someone whole and raw and it's probably going to be someone he loves before he moves on to someone he hates. Maybe it'll even be the same person. Who knows!! There's this tragedy to them both but Cayn is almost trying to tell himself he can Change it and Control the way the tragedy will fall (and getting humbled bad lmao) while Ysabel is like. Carrion carted away by the waves. Never stood a chance and at some point she stopped fighting very hard. Also I feel like. There's this Deep Intimacy yet Huge Emotional Distance between Aemond and Ysabel where neither knows how to communicate or really Approach someone so instead they have to consume maim kill leave a mark. I cannot touch you except to hurt you ect. And her obsession with him is in and of itself so haunted bc it's like she wants to Eat Him but she Doesn't but that way she can Control It but. And we stay at that but. While with Aegon and Cayn it's like yes I do like you. I fear writing the stronger word. Instead I will eat you whole and you will remember me by the imprint of my teeth on your side and I will remember you by the way I bloat with desire for you and choke on your blood <3 and it's like wooow. Wooow. Love it. Obsessed with it. As you can tell I do not like them normal. Do u know what happens to them at the end of the war? I can't imagine Ysabel ending up any better than Helaena. But also. I gotta say. Big fan of tragic siblings I am—I have So Many Feelings about these two relating to each other qnd hoe The Love Was Apparently There and it Didn't Change Anything. Too many feelings to put it too words. After all that word vomit (thank u if you read the whole way through) I wish to tell you that u have inspired me to make my Bolton oc more weird and unsettling and haunted. My disgraced Lenora and her legion of skinned animals and skulls <3 My Shadowskin Lady. I want her to be such a Freak while also being so tragic and doomed to being nothing but a third wife <3 but anyway!! I have stolen enough of your time and wish you good luck with your commissions!! Thank uu for replying to me and I look forward to future works on these doomed suckers 😌

under the cut because this got long ..

IM JUST GLAD TO BE TALKING ABOUT THEM !

it did make me sit and stare and giggle a little bit because its true you were very on the mark with them . i do think part of the charm with the boltons Is their inability to be anything but very un-subtly gothic and weird and strange . you look at them and you can immediately clock what's going on here .

and its very true… ill be so real and genuine i STILL havent watched hannibal the whole way through but ive absorbed the vibe enough through many years of being a gay person online to where yeah definitely this guy has some hannibal in him . that bit of restraint in really really trying to put yourself in a square that slowly but surely begins to crack under the weight of at the core needing to feed the urge to hurt something . believes himself to be strong enough to keep it away but ultimately the same fate waits each time …… similarly to ysabel . they both end up in the same place of hurt inflicted on others and in turn on themselves but while cayn fights against it and tries to rise above it ysabel leans into it and accepts it regardless of how much it scares her because she's always been taught to lay down and take whatever comes her way as a polite nice lady that doesn't fight and doesn't say no .

i do like to spin their relationships around in my mind . both separately and between each other . with ysabel i feel like her most intimate moments Are when she gets to be a little unhinged ie biting and chewing on someone etc because its very raw . so entirely separate from anything she knows and anything that's expected of her and so desperate and pleading that it gets very real . whereas cayn for a long time sees that violence as a failure to himself and in turn prefers to sit down and have a polite conversation and only thinks of how it would be to reach across the table and strangle a man . ultimately though that violence is inherent to him i like to think he wants to feel in control of it . wants to have the upper hand no matter what and doesnt like when it becomes an urge that just drives you without thought or reason . ysabel starving animal who cant help it vs cayn predator on a calculated hunt etc in the end theyre both very much formed by being raised by a dad who was so much worse . united in misery and a root of violence and hate and death that was planted in them from the moment they were born . they both have it and they will never escape it because there was never a point where it wasnt there. as for endings ….

i'm a little conflicted on them both partially because i still need to iron out some war details etc but as a general frame of reference it ends aaaalmost the same as in canon beyond the fact that the greens win a little more vividly . well . as much as you can 'win' a terrible tragic war with your own family . in the end jaehaera + aegon + alicent + cayn + ysabel and her kids are alive . aegon iii and viserys ii hang around too like in canon . i imagine errhhmmmm… (taps my noggin) aegon remarries . ive been fond of cassandra baratheon stepmom to jaehaera lately . well.. king's landing politics ensue . everyone is sort of miserable . i swear that i'll get to figuring it all out one day . i swear!!!!

most relevant to court i guess would be ysabel since i imagine she remains in the red keep for most of the war and after it . mentioned somewhere i think but she has two kids - a daughter (aelora) and a son (baelor) both of which make it through the war - but baelor is weak and sickly kind of partially because ysabel is basically left half-bedbound after her second pregnancy that probably shouldn't have happened in the first place . … he dies of illness pretty young which sends ysabel spiraling even worse than she already was post war . girls who have their bodies irreversibly ruined and torn apart to where they can barely function anymore in the hopes of having a son - giving a little boy to a husband who is bound to die at war and having your son follow closely behind and having it all be for nothing . i think she grows to resent her daughter silently for being a girl (westerosi misogyny so deeply seated even in its women) and i don't think they ever really grow all that close . sits and rots in her chambers or in the gardens and dreams about her dead son and her dead husband instead of looking to the family she has that are still there .

i think she's kind of disconnected from court just based on the fact she's entirely too hurt physically and mentally to really even be able to contribute much . she's allowed to sit in her misery because she's family to the targs atp but it's a little rough . in a little twist of weird connections i think she would get along with aegon iii pretty well in the sense that they're both horrendously miserable and she projects some sort of son onto him. sits and reads with him and talks about whatever kids talk about and acts like nothing is wrong for a few hours

i played with the idea of her eventually joining the silent sisters as a sort of final frontier of guilt and shame and horror at what her life becomes but i don't think she would even have the drive to do that much at the end of the war LOL

and cayn …

this one is trickier because he's …. … ……..? i dont know. i think its tough to find a real direction for him in my mind and i cant figure out why . but i think i got it.. more context first > their dad dies during the war, i imagine somewhere around rook's rest after the north is openly split apart or a bit later on when they actually try to go against the starks directly, and in my mind it kind of leaves cayn in (similarly to ysabel) in a state of being trapped in the past in a place he can never return to . their dad represents everything cayn believes he should be and all he should live up to and all his house and family stand for and seeing him die really does get to him . not to mention he also gets hurt pretty bad - just that chunk of harm that comes with war and what it'll do to a man. forever stuck on some field of battle far away and the world keeps spinning but you never quite spin along with it . dons his dad's armor and now suddenly he's saddled with the weight of responsibility and duty and all their family's pain both literally and metaphorically . kind of resembles the bolton skinchanging theories if you really get insane about it ie you take on a man's skin (his weird flesh armor) and now you're just as much him as you are yourself etc

i imagine he returns to king's landing for a while after they've duked it out with the starks for a bit and the north cools off a little . comes back and he's hurt and aegon is hurt and barely conscious half the time and his facade probably drops pretty harshly . spends some time taking care of aegon and doing what he's told and dreams about the fact that there has to be a purpose and a meaning to fighting a war . goes against what he used to want (restraint) and drives himself to violence and hate because if he doesn't then he'll sit down and think and realize that his dad died for nothing and theyve been fighting stupid battles for a cause that he doesn't really care about . rabid guard dog off the leash with no true goal he wants for and no true cause he believes in .

by the time the war ends and aegon remarries i imagine he leaves court because admittedly he would actually seethe a little bit seeing aegon married again . with helaena it was okay because i think he recognizes neither of them chose that and neither of them (from my perspective) really love the other in any romantic sense but when it's an active choice he gets really really upset . silently of course . <3 the gay yearning catches up with him and he faces the fact aegon is barely a person anymore and he has no place at court in turn . goes home to the north and with the greens sort-of-winning he's given winterfell and titles and they settle into some kind of peace for a little while. he marries a karstark girl because it's what his father had intended for him and they're about as unhappy as you can get in a relationship. maybe they have a son in time but more than likely not. i think while everything kind of holds up for a while there are a lot of issues here that don't seem to ever really get resolved properly - lots of unhappy lords and lots of bastard siblings who think they know better and lots of rumors and disagreements and a steady swirling pot of disaster boiling under the surface. i can imagine he goes off to fight off some rebellion after a good few years and ends up dead . maybe for the best .

i dont know if ysabel even really processes it . i think if she wasnt already so unresponsive she WOULD just step out a window

in another reality that im going to manifest in my mind space cayn stays in king's landing after the war and has someone else manage the north . sticks around and tries to ignore the fact that he's jealous and angry and feels no satisfaction or ease even when they've won and the war is over . sticks around and has a toxic evil homosexual relationship with the king that grows strained when he has a new wife and a kingdom to run properly this time and they settle into a horribly tense unbearable distance that's broken only when cayn steps up and poisons him or just chokes him out or something and proceeds to kill himself ala your first gay situationship where dying feels like a good alternative to having to process the fact that you cant really be together . hope you understand . either way the boltons (well . the ones that are relevant in this case there are always cousins and second cousins etc in asoiaf to pick up the slack) fizzle out and end up miserable or dead even after the promise of power and status is fulfilled . don't aim too high or you'll have that much further to fall if you will a whole lot of nonsense being put out here but i hope you enjoy whatever's cooking …. really really appreciate the interest and im glad to provide whatever u might be wondering about + more ramblings… would LOVE to see more freakish bolton ocs also . there is nothing like a horrible house that raises horrible people who reek of tragedy and terror and a doomed narrative and SO many chances to make something so fun please tell me more !

#txt #asks #oc tag #taps my noggin. subject to change .#i was going to do some doodles for this one but i got hit with the commission panic beam so itll have to be for another time .#skipping and giggling and playing etc #ysabel tag #cayn tag #alaric tag

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irrelevantwriter · 4 years

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White Flag

Pairing: Rio (Good Girls) x Female Reader/You

Rating: Explicit, NSFW

Warnings: Language, public sex, unprotected vaginal sex, mention of bodily fluids, slightly vulnerable Rio, declaration of feelings (sorta?)

Word Count: 4.3K

Summary: Part 5. Two months without seeing or speaking to Rio has left a significant mark and feelings finally decide to show themselves. Kinda.

A/N: I hope everyone had a good holiday or at least a chill Friday. I come bearing gifts with the next part of our favorite toxic saga. More smut for my lovely readers. But first, some plot. We jump right into it and just like our favorite non-couple, we gloss over a lot of bullshit and get right to the filth. But as a Virgo I love communication so I have to make these two stubborn assholes talk about their issues a little. At least in a vague way. Also, Rio has his read receipts on bc he is a petty king. There’s one more part after this and it's all naughty fun from here. I hope you guys like it. Feedback is that good shit. 💗

A/N dos: I’m thinking about making the next part strictly from Rio’s POV. I feel like it’ll give us a peek into what he’s thinking and a new take on the series thus far. I’m excited to explore that so let me know what you guys think!

*Read Part 1 here

*Read Part 2 here

*Read Part 3 here

*Read Part 4 here

*Read Part 6 here

*Give and Take series masterlist

*Masterlist in bio.

*********************

“So you’re just gonna eye fuck the hot stranger at the bar all night?”

Your friend’s teasing cut through the haze, jolting you back to the dimly lit bar. The music boomed around you while people drank and danced, enjoying the Saturday night out in the same way you and your girlfriends were.

“I was not.” You insisted, though the coy smile you wore said otherwise.

The group of women scoffed and rolled their eyes, seeing right through your faux innocence.

“Besides,” You started, taking a sip of your drink as the song changed into a bass heavy melody. “He’s not even my type.”

“Oh, bullshit!” Kara interjected with a raised brow, shaking her head.

You opened your mouth in surprise, but bit back your response when the other women chimed in.

“She’s right.” Evelyn agreed, throwing her dark hair over one shoulder.

“We knew you in high school and college, remember?” Nikki threw in, pursing her lips knowingly in your direction.

“Okay, so?” You said with a poor attempt at nonchalance.

“You were all over guys like that when we were kids. Paul ended up being the black sheep of the bunch.” Kara reminded you with a laugh, Evelyn and Nikki joining in with their own drunken giggles.

“Yeah, we were convinced you’d marry a felon with tattoos and not a real estate broker who wore khakis.” Nikki quipped, causing another round of laughter and snorts.

“Okay, okay...I get it. So I had a type. I think I’ve grown out of it.” You cut in, sounding as if you were trying to convince them as much as yourself.

“Not if the hottie at the bar has anything to say about it.” Evelyn joked with a wink.

You shook your head as you took another sip of your drink, unwilling to let them see you flustered. Or that they were in fact correct. You definitely still had a thing for bad boys...bad men to be more specific.

The evening had been going smoothly so far. It was a rare girl’s night out. An event that happened only once every five years when kids were shuttled off to babysitters or their fathers, and the women were able to enjoy an adult meal with adult beverages. Schedules between four busy women didn’t often align so when they did, you all jumped at the chance to indulge in the nightlife you’d left behind in your younger years.

You’d been the one to suggest the bar. It was a swanky, sophisticated space with an air of youth. The perfect mix for your outing. You’d been here only one other time.

With Rio.

Thinking of the man made heat pool low in your stomach, despite your lingering frustrations. It’d been two months since that shit show of a night at your house. You hadn’t seen or spoken to him since. After that debacle, you blocked his number. As childish as it may have been, you were angry. Still were. And rightfully so. He’d been a complete dick. He’d chosen the most inopportune moment to make adjustments to your arrangement. He’d been careless in his deliverance, harsh even. The entire exchange had you questioning everything. And instead of analyzing the situation and communicating like adults, you’d decided to stop all interactions with him. You’d wanted to send a message. Just as he had with you.

After the argument, you’d been an anxious mess in the days leading up to the next drop. But it was all for nothing because Rio wasn’t there. And neither was the new contact he’d told you about. Instead, Mick was waiting for you and offering up no other information. And it’d been that way for two long months.

In the days since, your mind wandered to Rio often. Your body lingered on his phantom presence constantly. You replayed the conversation you’d had a million times over and each time it made deep fury spill over and mix with the lust still raging like white water rapids through your veins. You missed his touch. Missed his desire for you. Missed the way he made you feel, so supremely sexual and wanton. All things you’d been lacking in your marriage. And now they were suddenly hitting you square in the face and begging you to pay attention. Begging you to not lose the source of your sudden awakening.

You missed the toxicity of your interactions. You were two twisted souls fighting for control over a situation that belonged to neither of you. And in truth, the basis of your relationship with Rio was denial and attraction. It would continue to thrive on that as long as you both refused the obvious.

So maybe, just maybe you’d come to the bar in hopes of seeing him in order to test that theory. It was a slim chance he’d even be here, but you were just buzzed enough that you were willing to roll the dice and find out. Plus, your desire for him felt like an extension of your body at this point. You had to satiate it. Had to feed the raw passion that grew stronger each day without him. It demanded it. And it wasn’t for lack of trying. But your own hand didn’t ignite your body the same way his did, asshole or not.

“I’ll be back.” You called over the music, gesturing to the darkened hallway that predictably led to the bathrooms. Your friends nodded and went back to flirting with the handsome blue-eyed waiter.

You shot a meaningful glance in the direction of the bar. To the “hot stranger”. Whether or not he’d take the hint was on him.

You made it to the single-use bathroom easily. It wasn’t late enough for it to be crowded with the surge of a Saturday night crowd, but the place was still busy. You set your purse down on the sleek surface of the sink counter, admiring the emerald green tiles that paved the walls. The fixtures were brass and gleamed in the light of the vanity bulbs. It was a beautiful space. Carefully crafted for a magazine like Architectural Digest.

Your eyes swept over your reflection in the large mirror that sat over the sink. You made sure not a lash was out of place as you surveyed your appearance. You adjusted the low neckline of your yellow dress, the hue radiating more gold than you’d initially noticed. The silk material felt cool against your heated skin, the slit in the skirt offering some relief. The long sleeves of the garment added a sleekness to the otherwise risqué ensemble. You’d never worn the dress. But tonight seemed as good a time as any to debut it.

The sound of the bathroom door creaking open made you pause, eyes watching in the mirror for who entered. You wondered if it’d be him. Wondered if he ended up following you like you’d hoped.

Your stomach knotted when Rio stepped in, closing the door and locking it with a resounding click. He was stoic. Shrouded in black and looking every bit as menacing as he truly was. A sight for your sore eyes.

You turned to face him, your chest both tightening and expanding at seeing him in the flesh. He made your heart stutter and your spine tingle, yet irritation slowly seeped into your pores, reminding you of the last interaction you’d had with him. It was a clash of sensations and feelings. It was utter chaos. And it's what you’d been missing.

Silence hung in the air as his gaze roamed your figure, appraising you hungrily. You shivered, careful to hide the gesture from his intense stare. You schooled your features and angled your chin up in confidence that you weren’t entirely sure you felt. But you weren’t going to budge. You were going to make him come to you.

He was leaning up against the door, a barely there smirk adorning his lips. His scent began to eclipse the smell of vanilla soap that permeated the air. Your eyes wanted to roll back at the familiarity of it. It was soothing. A comfort to your deprived senses.

“You miss me, mama?”

That deep rasp made your panties soak immediately. It was a question he’d asked you many times in the past, but you’d never felt it as much as you did now. Because yeah, you did fucking miss him.

You stayed silent.

He chucked at your refusal to answer. “Still mad at me?”

Again you said nothing.

He licked his lips, eyeing yours as he did. “I tried calling.”

“I blocked your number.” You finally responded, voice icy and detached.

“Damn, that’s cold.” He said with an amused shake of his head and a laugh, the sound making your nipples harden in traitorous lust.

“Why? Did you need something?” You questioned coolly, crossing your arms over your chest to hide your mounting arousal. Your thighs rubbed together, beginning to slid against each other as your arousal made itself known.

He stepped forward, heading in your direction with intent. You straightened your back, unwilling to let him get the upper hand on you. You knew what was going to happen. Knew where this was headed. So why not use it to your advantage? Why not toy with him for a change? He deserved it.

You used the added height of your heels and eased yourself onto the countertop, parting your thighs slightly so that your dress fell between them. You leaned back on your hands, the chill of the marble countertop beneath you reminding you so much of that day in your kitchen.

Rio’s steps halted momentarily as he watched you, eyes zeroed in on the juncture between your thighs that was hidden behind the silk. Your pussy practically begged for his attention. Dared him to see your need through the fabric that shielded you.

You were still upset with him. Still displeased with the way he’d chosen to handle the situation and you. But more than anything you wanted him to succumb to you. You wanted to feel that thrill of having him at your mercy. So powerful, yet so fragile in the midst of his bliss. You wanted...no, needed him to wave his white flag first.

“Tell me then,” You began, slowly easing the hem of your dress up as you spoke. “Business or personal?” You questioned, wanting to know if he’d be truthful about why he’d tried to contact you.

He resumed his path towards you with a dangerous lick of his lips, but his gaze never faltered as it took in every new stretch of skin that was revealed. He tried to reach out and touch you, but you raised a heeled foot to his abdomen and stopped him, keeping him at a distance.

“Answer me.” You breathily demanded.

His face registered your words while his eyes took in the stretch of leg that kept him away. You eased the limb back down and waited for him to comply.

He decided to play along.

“Business.”

He continued walking when you didn’t stop him, standing between your legs and trailing his fingertips along the inside of them. His movements shifted your dress up even higher onto your thighs. The sensation would’ve tickled if you weren’t already deliriously turned on.

“Liar.” You accused, already feeling his warmth radiate onto you as he edged closer. His breath mingled with yours, mint and whiskey assaulting your nose.

“So are you.” He retorted, eyes planted firmly on your parted lips. He moved in until you were sure he could do nothing else but touch his mouth to yours. And yet you still weren’t going to meet him.

“So we’re both liars?” You asked, arching a brow up at him.

“Yeah.” He nodded and swallowed, the tattoo splashed across his throat pulling your focus. You fell captive to his spell as you got lost in memories of licking and sucking the inked flesh, remembering the way he tasted on your tongue. The recollection caused your legs to widen and your back to arch into him, pushing your chest against his. God, you wanted him. You wanted him so badly that your pussy clenched around nothing, as if feeling him already deep inside you. It was a silent call to a lover. One he would never hear. But he’d feel it soon enough.

Your clit throbbed against your lace panties, aching to be assaulted by his talented fingers. With him so close you could feel just how badly you needed him inside you. It felt wrong for him not to be. Felt wrong to not have him share a pulse with you when he was this near. You were going to remedy that.

“Well then,” You whispered, leaning forward to hover over his lips. “I don’t want you to fuck me in this bathroom.”

His hands glided up your thighs while his nose skimmed along your cheek. His breath was hot against your ear as he maneuvered himself so that barely a sliver of air was left between you.

“So I won’t.” He lied in return, the words coating you like his cum had done numerous times before.

In an instant your lips were being pulled to his. His hands were suddenly everywhere and all at once, seeking out your flesh in desperation. It pleased you to know just how badly he needed you. How badly he craved you.

He slid you closer to him, letting your lace-covered lower half come into contact with his crotch. Ragged breaths and low hums filtered through the air as your bodies grinded against each other, seeking firm hands. You could feel him pressed against the zipper of his dark pants. He was hard. The notion made you moan into his mouth, scraping your nails over his scalp.

It was just like riding a bike. Except there was an added layer of intensity this time that hadn’t been there before. His touch burned hotter than usual. Your grew cunt wetter with every pass of his tongue along yours. They weren’t new sensations, but they felt different. Indescribable. Perhaps it was the public sex. Perhaps it was the underlying tension. Either way, it was remarkably explosive.

You pulled away from his insistent lips to take in air. He continued on, mouth moving over your neck and across your exposed cleavage. He nipped at the flesh, his lips sensuously soothing the area as he explored. You pushed into him in invitation, widening your legs so that he could press harder into you.

You waited for him to take the next step. Waited for him to escalate the moment into more than just heavy-petting and sloppy kisses. His hands, as if reading your mind, traveled up the skirt of your dress and found the edge of your panties. There was no hesitation or teasing in his movements as he roughly pulled them off, the elastic popping against your skin and making you cry out.

Rio licked at your neck in apology, his own hands now moving to his belt. You shifted closer to the ledge of the counter and followed the trail of heat that led to his pulsing cock. His flesh bumped against you, the feel of him hot and heavy along your soaked slit making you whimper.

Your nails dug into the fabric of his shirt as he pushed forward and sheathed himself inside of you in one hard thrust. You gasped and tightened your legs around him, your right hand in search of something solid. It landed on the mirror behind you, your palm sticking to its cool surface as you braced yourself for the inevitable.

His facial hair scratched at your skin as he buried himself into your neck. He held your hips steady as he retreated and then plunged back into your welcoming walls, stretching you with a burn that made you hiss. Your pussy massaged his length with fervor, seducing him further inside and begging him to claim you once again.

You reached for anything you could to stabilize yourself as he fucked you into the reflective glass at your back. Moans and groans intertwined as your bodies rocked against each other. The soap dispenser fell into the sink with a loud clatter as you accidentally made contact with it. The stack of towels folded neatly near the faucet became disheveled as your ass knocked them out of place with the momentum from Rio’s cock. The entire vanity shook with each intensely thorough thrust of his hips into your womb. It was animalistic. The very epitome of what bathroom sex in a bar should be.

No words were said. None were needed. Your actions led the conversation.

You squeezed your inner muscles around him, daring him to surrender before you. He twitched, his hips stuttering at the feel of you so tight and wet around him. He growled into your ear, a sure sign that he loved the gesture a little too much.

So you did it again.

“Stop that shit.” He grunted, hips picking up their pace.

“Cum.” You whispered in response, the demand disguised as a request.

“Fuck…” He groaned when you held him to you and clenched around him once more. You trapped him, giving him no choice but to experience your deliberate enticement. His fingers dug into your thighs almost painfully so, forcing you to wince.

He was close.

You reached between your bodies and massaged your clit, feeling your pussy react immediately. Sporadic tremors vibrated your walls and his cock, making both of you moan. Rio’s palm slammed into the mirror at your back as he rutted his hips harder into yours. He was rough and unforgiving, the aggression heightened by your disobedience. It had never quite been like this. There had always been a touch of softness, a soothing placation or word of encouragement. Not tonight. Not as he fucked you so hard you were sure the mirror was going to crack and rain down luminescent crystals of glass over you both.

You showed no mercy as you forced him to submit to you and your body. The precipice was there. It was within reach. You could feel that tightly wound coil ready to unravel. It felt like too much and not enough at the same time. Your mind was a prisoner to your pleasure. You thought of nothing but the sweet release that you knew was waiting for you. And it was. It was waiting for you with open arms as Rio finally came, triggering your own climax as he filled you so deliciously full of himself. His entire body tensed within you as he held you firm and painted your shuttering walls.

The familiar sensation only added to your high as your limbs tensed and loosened with each wave of euphoria that washed over you. You squeezed your eyes shut and catapulted through space as your body struggled to ground itself once again. Rio had gone rigid, letting you ride out your orgasm in peace as you suffocated his cock. His cum was already leaking from your walls before you’d even finished, a trail of him decorating your swollen pussy.

Your eyes fluttered open to see him staring back at you, his lips pulled into a lazy smirk. You mirrored his expression, releasing a breathless chuckle. Your body still hummed in excitement, but this time it was punctuated by the deep satisfaction that radiated from between your thighs.

“You good?” You teased, hands resting on his chest and feeling the rapid beats of his heart beginning to slow.

He laughed, the sound low and tinged with fatigue. “Yeah.”

He licked his lips and took in your disheveled state, gaze catching a glimpse of the lace bra you wore underneath.

“Let me drive you home.” He said suddenly, his arrogance alive and well.

It was on the tip of your tongue to deny him, but you chose not to.

“Sure.”

**********

The car ride was silent.

After your impromptu coupling in the bathroom, you’d made up an excuse about not feeling well to your friends and explained you’d already called an Uber. They were hesitant to let you leave alone, but somehow you’d persuaded them to stay and not follow you. You were sure the alcohol they’d consumed had something to do with it.

With hugs and promises of texts that everyone made it home safe at the end of the night, you departed from the bar with Rio in his Mercedes. He’d been driving for about ten minutes, the air not as tense as it’d once been. He seemed content to let the quiet linger, but you weren’t.

“What happened to the new guy?” You asked, glimpsing his face to gauge his reaction. It was dark in the vehicle, but you could still make out his silhouette amongst the various street lights.

He furrowed his brow and pouted his lips, confusion reading easily across his features.

“What new guy?”

“My new contact. The one I was supposed to have.”

“Didn’t work out. Mick has it handled.” He replied simply, gaze still trained on the road in front of him.

“Okay.” You said with a nod, the dryness in your tone letting him know you didn’t quite believe him.

He wordlessly turned onto your street and came to a stop alongside your driveway, putting the SUV in park. He angled his body to face you, trapping you in his stare.

“It was never about you.”

The question must’ve shown on your face because he continued.

“The switch. It wasn’t about you.”

“Wasn’t very convincing.” You deadpanned, scoffing as you played with the zipper of your clutch.

He didn’t react right away. Instead, he watched you. Watched you in that way that let you know his thoughts were as impure as the counterfeit money he produced.

“You look good in that dress.” He complimented, chin jutting out and gesturing to the fabric that adorned your body.

His praise made warmth bloom in your chest. The kind of warmth that was usually accompanied by butterflies in your stomach.

“Thanks.” You replied evenly, not letting him see just what his words did to you. Though you had a feeling he did, despite not bearing witness to it outright.

“Better without it.” He added with a slide of his wicked tongue across his bottom lip, his teeth following. The action was purposeful. Erotic. Blatant. It was all Rio.

You didn’t respond to his flirting. You only sighed, mirroring his position as you resigned yourself to have an honest conversation with the man.

“So,” You started, forcing your fingers to still. “What is it that you want?”

He eyed you for a long moment. Long enough that you started to feel self-conscious.

“You.”

You nodded, disappointed but not shocked by his reply. The word wasn’t new. Though it was lacking the hollow cockiness that usually accompanied it.

You opened your mouth to respond, but he spoke up before you could.

“In whatever way you’ll let me have you.” He admitted.

The statement caught you off guard. He wasn’t trying to be cute or charming. He wasn’t being placating or condescending. He was being serious, the hardened intensity in his dark orbs softening to a tender resignation that you were sure matched yours.

“What about you? What do you want?” He repeated back to you, eyes narrowing as he waited.

You took a moment to observe him. Your eyes followed the arch of his brows and the sharp jut of his cheekbones. You studied the pout of his lower lip and his Adam's apple as it bobbed with his throat muscles. He was so many things to you. None of which you could put into words. You didn’t think a word had even been invented yet. It didn’t matter. You were both making your own rules. And it seemed, for once, that the both of you were on the same page and playing by the same rules.

“I want you to have me.” You confessed, meeting his gaze.

And there it was. He was resigned to having you in limited capacity. You were resigned to finally letting him have you. Two conclusions coming together at the same moment. You weren’t quite sure what that meant for you both, but it was a start.

“Goodnight.” You whispered into the darkened cab, a small smile pulling at your lips.

You didn’t wait for him to react. You turned and opened the door, exiting the vehicle. He didn’t try to stop you. You rounded the front of the car, hearing the driver’s side window slide down.

“So I’ll see you next week?” Rio asked out the open window, chin resting in his hand.

“At the drop?”

He nodded.

You shook your head and laughed, though there was no real humor behind it.

“You wanna tell me again it wasn’t about me?” You challenged, a wide grin decorating your face.

He could deny it. He would probably try. But you knew the truth. And that was enough.

For now.

“Night.” He called, an amused upturn of his lips showing in the light of the full moon.

He turned to the street, starting the car as you walked up your driveway. His eyes followed you the whole way, ensuring you made it in safely.

You heard him drive away once you shut and locked the front door, your lungs releasing a long breath. You pulled out your cell phone and went to your blocked caller list. You selected Rio’s number and unblocked the listing, adrenaline releasing into your bloodstream as you did.

Almost immediately your screen lit up with a text.

Same time and place tomorrow?

You bit your lip, feelings akin to teenage infatuation bubbling to the surface. You hastily typed a response.

See you there.

The message was read immediately.

Rio Tags:

@tomhardydallasstarsgirl

#rio #good girls rio #rio good girls #rio x you #rio x reader #rio imagine #rio fanfiction #rio fanfic #nbc good girls #good girls nbc

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noobdls · 2 years

Text

a really long and slightly unhinged thoughts and feelings dump about tales of vesperia: first strike

love these frames a lot actually bc you can immediately see the tone being set for both of their characters. flynn being extremely serious and determined and yuri just looking bored, straight away showing how being here isnt really for him. even down to the little detail of his collar being unbuttoned, he does not belong here.

followed by a montage of essentially, yuri just following flynn. its such a simple narrative device but it works so great to displace him. always a step behind flynn, really demonstrating how right now he isnt following his own path but is instead being led along.

i think the movie very blatantly sets up how it will be a journey of both of them growing up. i actually really love how it manages to place yuri as a clear protagonist yet manages to be pretty equally about him and flynn with an overarching arch about the greater world story.

very soon thereafter yuri is practically thrown into a position where he has to grow up. forced to kill off a shell of his comrade and also live with that guilt as he now has to repent and take responsibility. his attitude towards repede changes from seeing him as a nuisance to actively caring for him, checking up on him in the middle of the night, and overfeeding him to fill the hole in his heart (lmao)

this part gets to me because up until now we have mostly just seen them bicker and argue and i think here this was yuri genuinely trying to reach out and seek support but instead ends up being faced with hostility which leads to their major clash. which btw is my fav part of the movie. i think this escalation works really well for them

and to be exact this is probably my favourite line of the movie. yuri deliberately provoking flynn to get him to be fucking real and stop pretending. kinda raw imo. like he’d rather get the shit beaten out of him and it be genuine than have to watch flynn try to upkeep his little fake persona

that being said i dont think his persona is fully just him being fake. i think he’s carrying a lot of baggage and trauma throughout this movie. all the repressed anger and desire to uphold ideals. be the perfect knight follow the orders, thats right. straying from orders and acting on your own gets you killed. its an internal struggle. a desire for things to be simple, black and white, etc

i think this is one of the reasons why i ended up liking the movie so much, i just feel like it adds a lot of depth to flynn’s character. in the game story line he’s fairly put together - neat and proper. but in fs he’s just oh so god damn angry and immature, as expected of a growing up storyline. but nonetheless, i just love seeing him in this conflicted enraged state. and i think it adds more gravitas to his character in the game as we now know composure doesnt come naturally to him and he had his own issues to resolve and grapple with before he could become this reliable ‘boring’ character he is in the game

meanwhile yuri receives a somewhat contrasting lesson. if you want to protect things dear to you, you need to take matters into your own hands. he’s learnt this first hand and it is now being reaffirmed, it could be argued that repede is the first thing he has wanted to protect

this i include because i thin its a very clear signifier to the change in his character. yuri at the start of this movie is very laid back, goofy, playful doesnt really wanna be there. but now he is forced to grapple with the concept of morality, sacrifice and choice. he becomes an active participant in the knight’s mission, really pushing for it and supporting the cause. he joins the knights because he has ‘nothing better to do’ but now he is learning about the importance of protecting others, and treasuring those dear to you.

and then he loses another friend. although this sacrifice is not in vain as it is for the good of the people, he’s still forced into a position where he in essence has to let someone dear to him die. this film is extremely brutal in showing yuri how unfair the world is, and forces him to make a lot of tough choices. which i think very clearly then reflect in the game story line, these choices he’s being forced to make here reflect the ones he makes in the game

in his own way flynn is also learning about sacrifice, and how it isnt always meaningless. he is first hand seeing how fredrock’s actions have impacted the common people. because he took a risk, these people now live. its a bittersweet lesson but i think her flynn can finally let go of some of the baggage he has been holding onto in regards to his dad. it teaches him the kind of knight he wants to be and reinforces what matters the most - people.

finally, in juxtaposition with their arguing and bickering at the start of the movie they are finally able to look at each other earnestly, and be honest with one another. they finally grew up and can acknowledge their own strengths, and take their own paths knowing that each is searching for his own way to make the world better. they are forever bonded by their experiences.

in contrast to the opening montage, by the end of the movie yuri walks past flynn not even looking back. finally ready to take his own path

some closing thoughts mostly shippy thoughts:

i think what i really liked about the movie is that prior to it i had a fairly two dimensional headcanon of their relationship, with flynn just being a simp for yuri, and yuri just being an easy going guy and accepting that love. (again this is just a headcanon i built in my head). a very giver receiver type deal. but in the movie i feel like flynn is just so angry?? he’s just so mad at the world and doesnt know how to navigate his emotions. and while they clearly have a history they almost dont get along? or more like, they know each other incredibly well but they’re not really understanding each other

so while at first my head canon for them was pretty unbalanced i think the movie essentially just added depth to them as characters and balanced out their dynamic for me. knowing yuri had to deal with this angry bratty flynn puts them on a more equal footing for me when flynn has to deal with all of yuri’s bs

because i think it’s true of real relationships that at different times different parties will be more on the giver or receiver end, meeting each other’s needs and being there for each other. so when i didn’t have this backstory for yuri really coming through for flynn (like, sticking with him and helping him understand his dads death wasnt in vain ultimately helping him overcome his trauma). before this the relationship in my head almost felt one sided or as if one liked the other a lot more. but yeah i think yuris words and actions in first strike really demonstrate the depth of their relationship and how much he really does care for flynn

and now i just find it interesting navigating their relationship with all this prior knowledge because i think a lot of depth can be now added to small actions and situations. navigating this push and pull and thinking about how their relationship would organically develop. because i think it’s not until the end of the movie where they sort of end up on the same page again and can move forward, but then how do they go from that to a romantic/ sexual relationship etc

#this was a whole ass ride #i rewatched the movie on a coach then started typing this #spread across like 7h of travelling #u probs shouldnt read this if u have any sanity left inu #tales of vesperia

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tipsydipsydo · 4 years

Text

➳ Dom-/Sub-Dynamics; Subspace

➳ rough Blowjob; deepthroating

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Gender of the Reader: male

Word Count: 826

Rating: 18+

Genre: Smut; literally pwp

Warnings: Sexual Language + Dirty Talk; Dom-/Sub-Dynamics; oral (Dom! receiving); Face-Fucking; Deepthroating; verbal Degradation + Humiliation; slight Mentions of Corruption-Kink; premature ejaculation (sub!); cumming in pants

Status: unedited like always bc I am a lazy Bitch

[Links]:

▪BTS Smut Drabbles | My Writings

▪Blog Navigation

「© tipsydipsydo」

This following story is my intellectual property and belongs only to my blog tipsydipsydo.tumblr.com!

I’ll not accept any kind of reposting, stealing or using/editing my work!

That includes reposting my content on other social media platforms too, even when you link me as the original author.

Thank you.

“Fuck, yesss... that’s a good boy! Taking me balls deep, shoving my cock into that sweet little mouth of yours and down your throat until you’re gagging and choking on my thick tip. Spit and tears are streaming down over your chin and cute pouty cheeks. That’s a view I like to see.”, growls Jimin in a raspy, lustdrunken voice.

His fingers have a tight, almost cruel hold in the hair on the back of your head, pushing you down until your nose is buried in his musky pubic hair. Fuck, he smells so good, it makes you tremble even more and your aching knees are so close to give up under the weight they have to carry. Your own cock, rock hard and in painful need of attention, is straining against the fabric cage of your pants and search desperately for any kind of relief.

The pupils of your teary eyes are blown out by lust and desire and your mind is clouded by the sharp yet pleasing pain of his length in your sore throat. Everything you can think about in this moment is Jimin’s delicious cock and your absolute submission to him. You love it, you need it. You need this rough treatment and the domination by Jimin.

Usual you’re both pretty soft and vanilla, you just seem to be so pure and innocent to him. Your boyfriend didn’t want to rush it and promises to take it slow wit you. Well...who said you want to take it slow and that he has to treat you like you’re a porcelain doll?

Today you told him in a very clear vocabulary that he doesn’t need to hold his real sexual nature back, that you want to experience him raw and untamed, that he can take you like he desire without any leashes. Maybe you dropped the little comment that you’d like to have a rougher session, that you have certain fantasies as well.

Of course Jimin made sure you remember your safe word and your ‘safe tap’, where you tap three times on his knee or any other near object when you can’t speak properly. ...but after that... Jimin’s entire personality shifted to something else... something you could be described as a hungry, sex-craving demon.

“Hm? What’s that? Are you trying to take even more of my cock into your mouth? God, you’re such a greedy and insatiable boyslut. Do you like that? Getting called a needy slut, a little whore, a boytoy? Yes, yes you do. Fuck, you’re such a perfect fucktoy for me, Y/N. I didn’t thought you would like that, I wish have known earlier that this rough manhandling, deepthroating and degrading is what gets you going. You look so pure and decent but behind closed doors you are such a whore. My whore. Correct?

You try your best to nod to his words, agreeing to his statement. Almost automatically your head bobs faster and faster, swallowing his whole length as if it’s nothing, flicking with the tip of your tongue over his oversensitive cockhead. At the same time your right hand moves down to his balls to fondle them, giving him extra pleasure. You want him to call you a good greedy slut, you chase praise and degradation at the same time. You want to hear his raw, hoarse voice calling you a perfect little whore, that’s all you want and need in this moment.

God, you are truly living for it, getting so much pleasure for yourself out of it that it’s hard for you to control yourself. You don’t know what Jimin would do when he finds out that you made a mess all over yourself and come in your pants untouched. Probably he would make fun of you, calling you a pathetic slut with no self control, a shame for him and other things. This thought alone unleash feelings of sexual excitement and desire in your body you didn’t expect you’d ever get them.

Well, maybe you should admit that you may have a certain degradation and humiliation kink.

“Come on, Bitch! Let me fuck your mouth, I wanna shoot my thick, creamy cum down your throat and I want you to swallow all of it! F-Fuck I- I think I’m gonna cum now-”, groans Jimin, a deep moan rumbles through his broad chest while he bucks his hips up erratically. Making sure that not a single droplet of his cum gets wasted and that you swallow everything he gives you.

You’re busy with swallowing and not choking on his cum, not realizing that the incident happened you’ve thought about. Jimin starts chuckling when he looks down at you and shakes his head with a smug smile on his lips, pretty pleased to see the wet patch in the fabric of your pants.

“Tz, what a pathetic little whore are you that you came in your pants after I face fucked you? Hm?”

#bangtanhq #bts smut #bts fanfic #thehouseofbangtan #bts x reader #purplearmynet #jimin x male reader #bts x y/n #kpop smut #jimin smut #bts x male reader #btswritersguild #jimin x reader #jimin oral dom #bts x reader smut #dom!bts #jimin humiliation kink #bts drabble #fanfic by tipsydipsydo

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foodreceipe · 4 years

Photo

Recreate the Ancient Egyptian Recipes Painted on Tomb Walls

Make bread fit for a pharaoh and a sweet treat out of tiger nuts.

by Jess Eng August 21, 2020

The ancient Egyptians left writing everywhere, with hieroglyphs carved painstakingly onto stone steles and miraculously preserved in papyrus. Though historians are able to study ancient texts on subjects from trade to funeral rites, one category is largely missing from the record: recipes. Without any textual directions or menus, historians have looked elsewhere to unlock the secrets of a 5,000-year-old culinary culture. As it turns out, paintings on tomb walls can provide a rare glimpse into one of the oldest cuisines in the world.Around 3100 BC, ancient Egyptians started to systematize their hieroglyphs, mummification techniques, and art, all of which influenced the construction of tombs. The most decorated tombs of the time, especially those adorned with food scenes, belonged to royalty. Workers painted scenes on tomb walls to commemorate the deceased’s accomplishments and to ensure that important ceremonies, from food to burial rituals, would endure in the Field of Reeds, the Egyptian afterlife. Some tomb paintings even included images depicting how workers prepared food.

Historians agree that tiger nuts (hab al-‘aziz), edible tubers found at the end of the Cyperus grass, were the primary ingredient in what could be considered the oldest-known Egyptian recipe, which dates from the 15th-century BC. A tomb painting interred with the vizier Rekhmire details how to make cone-shaped loaves of ground tiger nuts and honey. The scene depicts figures grinding tiger nuts with long pestles, and shaping the tuber-honey mixture with both hands into tall and pointy cones.

These images of tiger nut cones were meant to please the sun god Amun on Rekhmire’s behalf. But tiger nuts were not just used for special occasions. Egyptians also added tiger nuts to medicine and perfume, and ate them prepared in several ways. Some devoured tiger nuts raw, but others preferred it flavored, boiled in beer, or roasted atop a fire.

As popular as tiger nuts were, bread and beer formed the true bedrock of ancient Egyptian cuisine. Bakers usually made bread with emmer wheat and barley, two of the oldest cultivated grains. Bread was so important, in fact, that it had an outsized influence on ancient Egyptian writing. Historians have recorded 14 distinct hieroglyphs for bread.To learn more about the process of baking ancient bread, researchers looked again to tomb paintings. One of the most vivid bread baking scenes comes from the Fifth Dynasty tomb of Ту in Saqqara. One painting shows beer and bread production in tandem, with scenes of cooks making bappir, or beer bread, and the use of bedja, or ceramic bread molds for baking. The scene shows workers cooking bread outdoors through a process called stack heating, which involves baking bread dough inside two preheated bedja bowls clamped together. Additional tomb paintings convey many more steps of the baking process, such as workers kneading dough with both hands or mixing bread with their feet.

Another baking scene, from Ramses III’s tomb, suggests a possible recipe for emmer wheat bread that was sprinkled with grape juice to leaven it and boiled before baking. Drawn in motion, the workers smash grapes with their feet, shape bread into spirals, and bake the bread in a vertical tanoor oven.

These images tell one story about ancient Egyptian cuisine. However, it’s important to note that many did not have the same access to this food culture. The wealthy dead could command elaborate tomb paintings, specialty food items, and even food mummies of many varieties. According to Egyptian food historian Mennat-Allah El Dorry, food remains from the construction of the Giza pyramids show evidence of this divide: the wealthy ate larger cuts of meat and a varied diet, while simple workmen ate poorer cuts of meat and simpler foods. But besides this scant evidence, not much is known about class disparities in ancient Egyptian foodways.

Even though Egypt’s tomb paintings miraculously endured for thousands of years, more recent events have imperiled them. The vibrant paintings within Ramses III’s tomb nearly vanished due to early-19th century floods. Since the floods, historians have tirelessly worked to restore, reconstruct, and upload photographs of the paintings to the internet for future research. For some tasty research of your own, try your hand at these recipes for tiger nut cones and emmer wheat bread, inspired by ancient Egypt’s tomb paintings.

Rekhmire’s Tiger Nut Cones

Servings: 10 small cones Prep Time: 20 minutes Cook Time (plus cooling): 30 minutes

Ingredients 1 cup of tiger nuts, raw (tiger nuts can be purchased online or at many health food stores.)

¼ cup of honey

¼ cup of olive oil

½ cup dates, chopped (optional)

Measure out one cup of tiger nuts. Pour ½ cup of hot water over the nuts and let soak for 20 minutes. Then, drain off the water and use a food processor to grind the nuts into a powder.

Add the tiger nuts, honey, oil, and dates all at once to a pan. Mix constantly on medium heat for two minutes. Then, turn the heat to a low simmer, so the honey doesn’t burn. Continue mixing for the next five minutes.

Turn off the heat and pour the tiger nut mix onto a plate. Let it cool for 20 minutes. Form 10 one-inch-diameter balls with your hands. Shape the balls into cones, and stand them straight up.

Ramses III’s Emmer Wheat Bread

Servings: Six small loaves Prep Time: 1 hour and 15 minutes Cook Time: 15 minutes Ingredients

2 ½ cups emmer flour (you can purchase emmer wheat flour online from sites such as Bluebird Grain Farms or Camas Country Mill)

2 tablespoons honey

1/2 teaspoon instant yeast

1 cup warm grape juice

½ cup chopped dates (optional)

2 quarts water for boiling

⅓ cup of honey

Combine the emmer flour, honey, yeast, and warm grape juice in a medium bowl. Mix the ingredients and knead into a ball. Set aside the bowl, and let the dough rise for at least one hour in a warm spot.

During this time, preheat the oven to 425° F. Start boiling the water. Once it boils, add ⅓ cup of honey.

After an hour, split the dough into six equal pieces and roll each one into a ball. (Add the chopped dates, if desired.)

Roll each ball of dough into a long tube, and wrap until it forms a spiral.

Gently place one bread spiral at a time into the boiling water, using a long spoon. Let the dough boil in the water for at most two minutes. Take the dough out, and put it on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. Repeat with the remaining spirals.

Once all six spirals have been boiled, place the baking sheet in the oven for 14 to 16 minutes. Serve the bread warm, or at room temperature.

https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/ancient-egyptian-recipes

#Ancient Egyptian #Recipes

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nonbinaryresource · 4 years

Note

ive been thinking abt this for a little while & have been needing to ask someone abt it. i am nb & have always considered myself trans but recently ive not been vibing with the trans label bc i am so sick of seeing ppl exclude & invalidate nb ppl. ik that i shouldnt stop doing smth just bc other ppl r being assholes but its so tiring to see ppl constantly say how u dont belong or arent valid. srry this is long & kinda rambly i just dont really know how to feel abt it

I will directly address your ask, but I’m going to start by telling you a story about my journey with identifying as asexual and queer.

When I was about 11, my friends suddenly started drooling over magazines and calling people hot, and I didn’t know what it was, but I knew I did not feel whatever it is my friends were feeling.

Until I was about 16/17, this part of me remained a mystery to me and to my friends. I never had crushes, I never found people hot, I never liked complimenting people physically, I was uncomfortable with sex on TV, and I didn’t even like platonic touch. Now my group of friends were all repressed and closeted queer folk, so I didn’t have to deal with “being left behind” as my friends dated. But the later we got into high school, the more my friends began discovering and exploring their sexualities. A freshman became a part of our friend group and was openly trans and gay. One friend came out as gay. Another as bi. They started commenting more and more about other’s looks and having crushes.

Still, there was nothing on my end. My friends used to think I was just being vague and secretive because this is what I tended to be like. I don’t think they’ve ever realized how much of it was that I truly didn’t know or understand what my lack of sexual feelings meant or that it could even mean anything. I used to just consider it a “nothingness” of myself. Until, by complete chance, I came across the term asexual. I immediately connected with it. It explained so much that I didn’t even know I needed explained.

I came out quickly after that and I was really excited and happy and proud to know who I was and what how I felt meant. My friends were great and supportive. My mom was a little ignorant but overall supportive. AVEN was great and a community for me. But if I tried to talk about it anywhere else online…

Well, the effects of how people treated me would fester for years. See, I came out as asexual before exclusionism (the specific movement of anti-aro and anti-ace erasure and gatekeeping from lgbt+ spaces) was a movement or a named thing. Yet exclusionist attitudes were exactly what I faced. My queer friends all completely accepted me as one of them and I helped co-run our school’s new GSA with the rest of them. But online, as a teen, I was facing 30+ year olds telling me I wasn’t queer and that I was just trying to seem special and that I needed to shut up about my asexuality and my experiences and that I wasn’t valid and that asexuality wasn’t a real thing and that even if asexuality was a real thing it wasn’t valid and it certainly didn’t matter.

I graduated high school and went to college and was no longer really in touch with my group of friends. I therefore completely cut myself off from any lgbt+/queer community, even though a friend invited me to join the college’s queer association. I stopped participating so much in online asexual spaces. I become wrapped up in other things.

A couple of years went by and a lot of things in my life changed. By chance, mod applications for a blog about aro and ace headcanons for a fandom I enjoyed came across my dash. I had extra time on my hands and thought I could help, so I applied and was accepted. This increased my exposure to the aspec community again and thrust me back in… just around the time exclusionism was becoming a specific and named movement of bigotry.

At the same time I resisted these ideals, I was also still hurt and unhealed from what I’d gone through as a teen. I internalized a lot of the hatred and gatekeeping. I was so hurt and so tired. I just wanted to be able to exist in peace. And people I considered myself one of were harassing me and dismissing even my biromanticism. So I struggled with my identity and my asexuality. I did not specifically become an exclusionist, but I turned my back on the lgbt+ community and spaces. I did not consider myself lgbt+ because I learned that doing so only brought pain and upset and made me feel alone and isolated. I didn’t speak a lot on exclusionism or inclusionism, but at some point I did make a plea to my fellow aspecs to just let the larger community go and be our own community and accept that maybe we could be straight. I did it out of desperation and hurt, wanting to stop feeling targeted and attacked and to stop seeing the fighting on my dash and in the tags. I just wanted us all to be happy and feel accepted and supported.

On that post, one wonderfully kind and patient person opened up a discussion with me, explaining their own hurts over exclusionism and being so damn exhausted of them and fellow aspecs being targeted and excluded and written out and not supported and feeling like they had to split their asexuality from their other queer identities and how being asexual was a part of them and how it had strongly shaped their experiences, especially with realizing and coming to terms with the other parts of their queer identity. And through their raw honesty I came to realize… I had never stopped to process the harassment I had faced and the pain and hurt that cut me so deeply.

It was a changing point for me. I realized that I had handled my pain in a bad way and had ended up lashing out at other aspecs instead of the people who were actually hurting me. I realized how much I had hurt myself and held myself back and cut myself down and dismissed parts of myself trying to fit into the box exclusionists had laid out for me, as if I could ever made them happy enough to stop harassing me and just let me exist. I cut myself down for them, but the truth is that exclusionists don’t just want aspecs “out” of the community. They want to hurt us. They want us to hurt. They want us to doubt ourselves. They want to feel strong and powerful, and they feel they can achieve this through bullying us. Perhaps some, like myself, are trying to appeal to their oppressors by pointing out another vulnerable group they could target more/instead. They are passing on hurt instead of standing up to it and so they are actually festering in hurt instead of changing anything.

Today, I am a staunch inclusionist. I understand myself and the issues aspecs face much better. I am a more compassionate person regarding the confusion and upset aros and aces have over their identity and their place in the world. I feel more stable and confident regarding my identity as an asexual - and now as an aromantic - queer person who is lgbt+.

But it was a long, hard, difficult journey to get here. It was full of a lot of turmoil. I wish I would have had a happier journey where I felt more supported and accepted, and I hope I can help provide more stability and support for future generations to not have to go through what I did.

My point (or one among a few, anyway) is that I deeply and personally understand how you are feeling and the decision facing you now. As someone who went through a very similar experience, my advice to you is to take care of yourself and to prioritize your mental health.

It’s okay if you can’t handle identifying as trans right now. Maybe you do need some space from the label (and definitely from the hatred and gatekeeping). Maybe you need to pull back from certain communities or blogs or discussions.

However, I will say that not identifying as trans may not bring the peace you desire. It may end up making you feel even more isolated. Not identifying as LGBT+ certainly didn’t help me. It was reactionary and it only made me feel like there were less spaces for me. That said, you may find peace in this. But I think the bigger action to take is to separate yourself from those who are saying harmful things more than to separate yourself from a label you feel really suits you. Use your block button liberally. Don’t force yourself to partake in spaces where gatekeeping is allowed or encouraged. Follow and listen to more people who are inclusive.

I think burnout like this is unfortunately pretty common. You do not have to force yourself to face this hatred or exhaustion because you think it’s the right thing to do. It’s okay to pull back and just take care of yourself. Just work on some self-care. Work on building up a community of people around you who don’t resort to bigotry and hatred and exorsexism and gatekeeping and identity policing. Engage only with what you can actually, honestly handle.

We will confront and move past this bigotry only by acting as a united front. The responsibility for improving things isn’t on any one person’s shoulders. And no one needs to be on the front lines 100% of the time, especially at the cost of their own wellbeing. Take care of yourself and rest now before you completely burn out and break down.

You do not have anything to prove, okay? I have both hope and faith that there is a lot more to your journey - a lot more good things and a lot more happiness and belonging. Take whatever time it is you need to help heal yourself and recover from the hurt and harassment that’s been plaguing you. You are important and you matter, much moreso than whatever label you use at whatever point in time. It will be okay.

I am here for you.

~Pluto

#mod pluto #validation #exorsexism #gatekeeping #exclusionism #long post #identity policing #self care #identity #coping #queer #lgbt #mod tera #anonymous #ask #answered #asked #nonbinary

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niijsii · 4 years

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TW // nsfw, consent, sexual assault (I guess?), rapist ment, talking/ranting/dissecting my stress about the mature update of km's translation

This is a big word vomit/info dump please don't feel the need to read this i just really needed to get this out NOT on twitter

So the translation of the nsfw has some little moments that make me uncomfortable about WolfShin's sexual relationship and I don't know how to feel about it bc I KNOW Wolfgang is a good person and that he has a lot of love, care, and adoration towards Shin and his general happiness/comfort/pleasure but I really hate how Shin does yelp w/ "no" and/or "too fast" (mainly in Chapter 4) and while my concept of verbal consent is very different than most others, I do think a lot of these bl manhwa's make use of this consent problem w/ characters that are honestly very evil and despicable and openly hurt and traumatize their "lovers" or sexual partners whereas WolfShin have an established problem w/ verbal communication in general so I really can't tell if I am reading too into it but this also comes from someone reaching out to me before the nsfw updates translation about Wolfgang being an asshole abusing his power over Shin and ig what I'm trying to say is that i love my boy and i know haga and kjy love him too and worked hard to make him out to be an empathetic and good man that cares about others and is desperately in love so i just fear how others are going to treat me, km, and Wolfgang in general... i can only hope that this will relate to the big communication issue that they have about their wants and desires ESP bc Shin does very obviously like Wolfgang on both an emotional/romantic and sexual level... i also have personal experience w/ this exact thing where me and my so lacked decent communication until about a few years ago, so maybe that's why I'm stressed— bc I see myself in Shin and I see my so in Wolfgang in reference to this weird dynamic of feeling unable to properly communicate what i like and what I don't or even the concept of no/yes etc. idk im just a little stressed bc i really love WolfShin as separate entities and as a unit bc of how much they do mutually care for each other... i really just don't want to see people call Wolfgang a rapist? I guess? Is he now a rapist? Am i going crazy? I just hate the idea of me or people stopping reading km bc of this little and simultaneously huge addition of information into WolfShin's life, ESPECIALLY bc Wolfgang really thinks he isn't forcing Shin to do anything and that he knows Shin's sexual tastes and how Shin (from what we see/read) DOES like having sex w/ Wolfgang— from how he looks at Wolfgang, how he thinks back about Wolfgang and their sex fondly, how he really DOES want Wolfgang for himself, it's confusing i think to both readers and Shin too since he also does technically see himself as a sexual object due to his sexual trauma? IM SORRY FOR RAMBLING AND IF YOU MADE IT THIS FAR AND I FREAKED YOU OUT and want/need more context feel free to reach out but I just really needed to air out my mind about this bc I really don't know how to feel since I never really read the korean raws of these added explicit sex scenes NOR THE IMPLIED VERSION OF THESE SCENES from the all ages ver in positive way anyway!!!!!!! I've always felt that there was an intentionallly written, confusingly complicated power dynamic at work w/ them that fluctuates in a stressful way, ESP for Shin, and how the sex they have doesn't reflect the real love tht they have and how it's more focused on the HAND HOLDING, the HUGS, the KISSES, the DANCE, that these areas are where WolfShin's relationship FLOURISH and have positive meaning. AM I MAKING ANY SENSE?! Anyway thanks for reading please don't let this make u hate WolfShin or KM I really feel like this might change once they establish better communication about them, their trauma, and the power dynamic in play bc of Wolfgang's "your body belongs to me" issue that continues to exho throughout the narrative of WolfShin's love that DOES exist.

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in-a-cave-with · 5 years

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What are your favorite fanfictions based in any of the Marvel comics universes?

ok this is certainly a . question. lmao . so i..have bookmarked like Three 616 fic on my actual ao3 account and i honestly dont know why. i have read so much 616 fic but i never bothered to make it a habit to .. save them . so rip me. this will be an incomplete list! huge f in the chat lads

there’s also the issue of like. pretty much all of the comics fic i like being, uh, stevetony. im a loser.

anyway.

When The Lights Go On Again by elspethdixon, seanchaiSummary: Aliens have invaded earth, and the Avengers are scattered. While Steve leads the resistance, Tony once again finds himself playing captive scientist. In the midst of a violent alien regime, separated by seemingly insurmountable boundaries, Steve and Tony have nothing to keep themselves going but each other.rec note: i JUST read this fic and it ruined my life. go read it and ruin your life too

Resurrection, Reconstruction & Redemption by elspethdixon, seanchaiSummary: Doom brings Steve back from the dead. Hijinks ensue, some of which might vaugely be considered plot.rec note: a classic! i think this was the first stevetony fic posted to ao3? you should def go ahead and read the rest of the series (yes it is a series yes it is 300k+ words yes it is worth it)

The Roughest Day by elspethdixon, seanchaiSummary: Steve is in a motorcycle accident, Tony catches a cold, and someone is after the New Avengers.rec note: this gives me warm fuzzies because it’s the new avengers avenging and there isn’t enough of that

King of Infinite Space by elspethdixon, seanchaiSummary: A villain from Tony’s past comes back to cause trouble for the Avengers. Maybe it wouldn’t have been so easy, if things weren’t already so awkward over the events of Execute Program.rec note: it’s not a tony stan created reclist if there isn’t a tiberius stone fic somewhere on it

Winter Is All Over You by KiyaarSummary: Tony can’t remember why he’s running.rec note: *soft wheezing noises* oh,

My Mallory Heart [Add Violence Remix] by KiyaarSummary: He keeps seeing that bundle of metal set into Tony’s bare chest, the raw edges around it like Tony’s body was rejecting it. Keeps wondering: what have you done to yourself this time.rec note: *incoherent blubbering*

Sea Stars by MuccamukkSummary: Steve comes back to life somewhere entirely unexpected; Tony doesn’t remember being a hero; something is rotten in the province of British Columbia, and the 2010 Olympics are doomed.rec note: i LIVE for this fic it’s so good. the setting…the mystery…the characterization…top notch

Indelible by PenumbrenSummary: When an experiment goes awry, Tony thinks he may have found an answer to his problems and Steve faces something he’s been avoiding for a very long time.rec note: this turned out to be way sadder than i thought it was going to be

(Not So) Lonely At The Top by foldingcranesSummary: Riri has a bad day, and Tony tries to be An Emotionally Available Adult for her. It doesn’t go so bad.rec note: there isn’t enough riri fic out there…

if you leave by CapnShellheadSummary: After so many months passing each other in silence, Steve and Tony find a marriage counselor to try to work through their issues with communication.rec note: warning: fic is akin to a bat swung to the knees

Marvels: The Bloodstone Odyssey by teaberryblueSummary: The year is 1940. In the middle of the Blitz, Tony Stark and Pepper Potts set out to London to recover Howard Stark’s lost work. But it turns out that they’re not the only ones hunting for it. Tony finds himself contending with Nazis, crooks, and perhaps his most formidable adversary yet: a scrawny, asthmatic, bullheaded kid named Steve Rogers.rec note: this gives me huge indiana jones vibes and it’s GREAT

Emanata (The Comics Will Break Your Heart Remix) by teaberryblueSummary: Steve Rogers has the opportunity to fulfill his childhood dreams of becoming a comic artist when eccentric billionaire, superhero patron, and obsessive comic enthusiast Tony Stark offers him a job drawing Iron Man. But Tony Stark has no idea that Steve Rogers is really Captain America, the newest member of the Avengers. And Iron Man has no idea that Captain America is really Steve Rogers, up-and-coming comic book artist. And Steve doesn’t know what to do about the fact that he’s falling head over heels for them both.rec note: this one has a special place in my heart bc it’s the one that got me into 616 stevetony! the identity shenanigans make my head hurt and i love it

Genesis by teaberryblueSummary: Reluctant to make the truth about their secret weapon known, the American Government tells the world that Captain America is a man named Steve Rogers. According to public record, he died, tragically, in 1945, and he became legend. In 1998, the Avengers find a body trapped in ice. She’s alive. Her name is Eve. She has Captain America’s shield.rec note: i think this is the..only steve centric fic here lmao . and also technically this is a mix of 616/mcu/ults but i’m still putting it here bc it’s…very good

Highest fall you’ll ever grace by laireshiSummary: “You’ll probably want these back,” Tony says at last, and it hurts almost physically to pull the dog tags over his head and offer them to Steve. But they never really belonged to Tony, did they? Steve seems to hesitate for a second, but then he takes his dog tags with a weird expression. “Yeah,” he says. “They’re mine.”rec note: *clutches heart* hhhh

Transmission by laireshiSummary: The incursions are stopped. Steve hopes for things to go back to normal. Instead, he finds himself stranded in an alternate universe with Tony. Getting home won’t be easy. There are too many things they haven’t told each other, too many arguments they’ve never solved. Now, with just each other for company, they might have to face them all—especially as they seem to be telepathically bonded, and can’t keep anything unsaid anymore.rec note: oh boy am i a sucker for Stevetony Finding Out About The Confession

Chasing Shadows by laireshiSummary: Steve is still adjusting to the future. Tony hopes he is helping, but Steve’s and Iron Man’s morals might be too different for them to work together. Then Steve starts to act strangely, and all Tony can do is chase at shadows.rec note: this fic hurt me . that’s it that’s all i have to say

The Counselors Are In by cptxrogersSummary: Steve and Tony from Avengers Assemble open a counseling service for all the other Steves and Tonys from across the multiverse. God knows they need it.rec note: come on Other Universes GET IT TOGETHER

Think of This as Solving Problems (That Should Never Have Occurred) by SinealaSummary: No one knows Tony is Iron Man. Then Tony gets amnesia, and literally no one knows Tony is Iron Man.rec note: ok here comes the sineala spam in the reclist lmao

The Jar by SinealaSummary: The Avengers are ridiculously competitive people, and what starts out as a silly late-night team discussion quickly becomes a contest: their names. Not the code names – the nicknames. Who can go the longest without using them? They pledge to spend a week not nicknaming each other, and they’ll pay up every time they mess up. This hits Tony the hardest, and not just financially. Tony’s got a lot of nicknames for everyone, but most of all for Steve – and when Tony can’t use the names he’s already got, the names he uses reveal feelings he had no idea he had.rec note: super cute! lov those funky avenging dudes

Changeling by SinealaSummary: Instead of deleting his entire brain and reloading from a backup, Tony attempts to erase just the SHRA database from his mind. As Steve later finds out, this is unfortunately not what he actually did.rec note: *ugly sobbing* ttngngjfgnTONY ,.,,,,CAROLLLLL ,,FDF..,,KSDJBVSD ,,,S T E V E..,,,, FVKJD,,,,SFDJKDNFVNKDJFD

If You Want to Live (The Historical Present Remix) by SinealaSummary: The Civil War is over. The SHRA is gone. Steve has been brought back to life. He’s settling into his new duties as America’s top cop. His longtime friendship with Carol Danvers – Avenger, former director of SHIELD, and former leader of the pro-Registration forces – is now a tenuous one. But something is very wrong in the world. This isn’t how it was supposed to be. Someone is missing. Tony Stark was killed at the age of seventeen, and it’s up to Steve to travel into the past to save a man he doesn’t remember from a man he knows all too well: a mysterious assassin from another time and place, a man with a metal arm. And the truth is more complicated than anyone could ever have guessed.rec note: super interesting fic! the Plot is,,……. some güd shit

Straight on till Morning by SinealaSummary: Tony Stark resigned his commission in Starfleet five years ago, after a disastrous away mission, and he swore he’d never go back. He just wants to be left alone to build warp engines in peace. But the universe has more in store for him than that, as he discovers when Admiral Fury comes to him with an offer he could never have expected and cannot possibly refuse: first officer and chief engineer aboard the all-new USS Avenger, a starship of Tony’s own design. What’s more, the Avenger’s captain is Steve Rogers, hero of the Earth-Romulan War. Believed dead for over a century, Steve is miraculously alive… and very, very attractive. But nothing is ever easy for Tony. As he wrestles with his secret desire for his new captain and his not-so-dormant fears, another mission starts to go wrong, and Tony becomes aware that Steve has secrets of his own – and the truth could change everything.rec note: ok there is, like, really weird porn in this fic but it’s a STAR TREK CROSSOVER and that’s all that really matters. and also it’s very heartfelt and the action is r e a l l y i n t e n s e

Your Name on Every Wall by SinealaSummary: The Time Gem throws Steve into the past rather than the future, and in doing so, it gives him the opportunity to undo his past mistakes. But when it turns out that all of his mistakes involve Tony Stark, Steve begins to wonder if he’s ever going to be able to mend things between them.rec note: wow…….stevetony…….. am i right boys?

Get Some Now by SinealaSummary: Avengers Mansion has a mysterious feline infestation. Meanwhile, Steve just can’t figure out how to ask Tony out on a date. And the thirteen teleporting cats sure aren’t helping matters any.rec note: as you all may know. i am an active member of the “tony…..but give him a cat” movement and this fic brings me great joy

Sucker Punch by Sineala Summary: Steve never quite warms to Tony Stark, Avengers benefactor. The Molecule Man never strips Iron Man out of his armor. Life goes on for the Avengers, but as disagreements split the team – and Shellhead and Winghead – again and again, Steve wonders why Iron Man always picks Tony over him. And when Steve finds out, it happens in the worst way possible.rec note: and here is a fic that does NOT bring me great joy and instead goes out of its way to hurt me in every way it can

Tony Stark Advises The Avengers by copperbadgeSummary: Somehow, Tony Stark ended up Team Dad.rec note: ANAD AVENGERS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Zero Sum by CraitSummary: Did you do your best, Anthony? And did your best only make things worse?rec note: let ao3 user crait write marvel comics, they clearly understand tony’s character better than anyone who’s written him in the past 10 years

#fic rec #long post #lmao tumblr user in-a-cave-with exposed as angst leech #a couple of these delve into potentially triggery topics (i.e. suicidal ideation/alcoholism) but theyre all properly tagged #except for. uh. the first two which talk abt the 2nd drinking arc in vol 1 a lot. so just b careful

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xododa · 5 years

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the thing about briar u:

(i haven’t read the 3rd book yet bc connelly and brenna just took my soul with them)

the chase:

two points:

1- I absolutely LOVE The Chase, Colin Fitzgerald for sure reap my heart and this is a real statement: it belongs to him. I don’t i have words to describe what a feel for him, because I see myself there, I put myself in his place and completely understood what he was feeling about everything.

2-I won’t say too much about Summer, just that she’s my animal spirit and for sure a sagittarius, thanks my girl was so compreensive with Fitz feelings.

Well, I feel Fitz in ways i thought I didn’t know it was possible, we both are so similar when it comes of feelings, he has this jungkook vibes (at least the one a put jungkook in to, my virgo baby is so precious) and almost died every time he let go a chance to say something to Summer. But I genuinely understand him because is so hard for restrained people and insecure like us to really demonstrate our feelings just because we think a lot about not being reprocal and those stuffs. Their evolution really was something, thought I would be glad with more moments of them getting to know each other, little steps of Fitz open himself to Summer and her being all comprehensive and patient with him. Fitz, to me, is a unique character in the hole Briar universe, Garret, Logan, Dean and Tucker were all very clear about their feelings, with themselves at least, and in Colin’s case was something that he tried to convince himself to believe HE was worth being loved and more, that he was worth having Summer with him. So the thing about Fitz it’s just that I feel him in every way.

“So yes, Summer is everything. She’s my muse. My sketches of her are already being transferred onto my computer to create the assets for the new video game I’m designing. She’s my laughter, because everything she says makes me laugh. She’s my trigger, because holy shit do we scream at each other sometimes. I never knew I was capable of expressing raw emotion, didn’t think I even had it in me. She’s my desire, because I can’t take a step without wanting to be inside her. But most of all, she’s my heart.“

i will repeat this but my.baby.deserves.the.whole.fucking.world

the risk:

i dont think i’ll EVER get over Jake Connelly. his the most precious thing in this world and I too FEEL him, my baby deserves so much. pls elle kennnedy bring more of connelly and brenna im dying with a hole in my heart.

Ok, let’s begin with the risk, Brenna is amazing no news, I was very moved with her story, but this thing I love about Elle’s writing is that she puts emotion in the male characters, it's so hard to find males with this kind of feelings, but they exist hahah. As with Colin, Jake had in the first moment, i read it somewhere and I agree, Jake has this Logan vibe, he wants to have Brenna and goes for it, its the only Off Campus male I can put together, don’t know whyyyy. I just finish read the risk and I had to put in words what I was feeling because I was very close to ripe my heart out. Their deal lead to a very good thing between them, It shows that a person in much more than what you can see for outside and even with the whole enemy stuff they find a way to be together and the CHEMISTRY my god, its amazing, they feel each other, the connexion is what I call. I think Connelly has this altruistic feeling somewhere, trying to make those who are important to him happy, and I would say he’s a tauros, very comprehensive and also sassy (i LovE iT). The thing about him helping Brenna immediately every time she need it and also always being clear that he wanted her, being clear about his feelings was something that had me falling for him. But most, when he abdicated his happiness due to his talk with the team and regretting was something, man. I’m not good putting words or writing, but the feeling the genuine feeling of falling in love for the first time and don’t know how to react to this, Connelly had it, he was so comprehensive and caring with Brenna, even when they had the confused feelings, maybe things are getting random, but Brenna is amazing, Jake is amazing and I had SO MANY beautiful quotes to put here put man and for sure I’ll read the risk again, but I think those are THE ones:

anyway, thank you Jake Connelly and Brenna Jensen I think I got a lesson coming from both of you (sobbing).

#elle kennedy #briar u #off campus #jake connelly #brenna jensen #brenna and jake #summer and fitz #summer dilaurentis #colin fitzgerald #the chase #the risk #jake and brenna

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isuzukuretsuki · 5 years

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Ikemen Revolution - Edgar’s Route

Sirius | Lancelot | Fenrir

aka the sexiest man in the entire red army the entire cast. the hottest stud in the military. the most gorgeous boy in Alice’s harem. the man who will satisfy your wishes and desires, the man who will make your hopes and dreams come true.

THE SMOOTHEST TALKER EVER

it’s been over a month since I finished Edgar’s route but here is his long awaited and very delayed scream fest. I wrote this up bit by bit over the course of two months but I never had the time to sit down and proof read it until now because of school and I didn’t want to post something half assed because it’s Edgar! Also this is uhh... really freaking long LOOL. As usual, if you you want my actual serious final thoughts on the route, just skip to the final blurb.

Now with literally every red army route so far (except Jonah), OF COURSE the Black Army mofos send Alice off with more NAMELESS, FACELESS soldiers who can’t do shit in the face of kidnappers, and end up getting their ass kicked, leaving poor Alice completely defenseless. This time around, the kidnappers make off with Alice’s belongings into the sunset so Alice can’t return home.

That is until our dashing gentleman aka Edgar comes in going like hey baby I’ll help you find your stuff so won’t you please come home to bed with me and of course Alice accepts because he’s a damn hot stud.

Aw Kyle don’t say that ;;;;;.

SO PRECIOUS.............

I’m going to say it right now but Edgar is ADORABLE. Literally the first half of his route is just him and Alice bonding over their love of candy and playing with animals. Edgar even takes Alice out to see a family of ducks he takes care of and he refers to them as his own family and fucking named them “The Creeks” JUST HOW PRECIOUS CAN HE GET???? Considering how Edgar is portrayed as that “evil scheming asshole here to ruin everyone’s day” in everyone else’s route, I didn’t expect him to be so sweet BUT HE IS SUCH A GOD DAMN SWEETIE as you can see I’m infinitely biased towards LIs who like animals.

What... a .... fucking... dork

lmao @ Lancelot trying to act like a do-s when he’s the complete opposite of that. This man doesn’t have a single sadistic bone in his body... he’s just a big mushy teddy bear.

WHAT A FUCKING BIG MUSHY TEDDY BEAR, BOTH OF YOU.

The red army boys are a bunch nerds you just can’t help but fall in love with after going through their routes... especially Edgar’s! I love them all so much.

OH NO MY BABY DON’T SAY THAT PLEASE.

lmao I love the blatant acknowledgement. But also mood.

Anyway after Zero zeros in on Edgar being a sketchy prick, Edgar mopes around some more because “shit Zero is exactly right” and he has a realization that he has Feelings In His Chest. Of course Alice catches on so she bakes him some super unhealthy cookies to make him feel better (ღ˘⌣˘ღ).

I MEAN... I DON’T BLAME HIM, BECAUSE SAME.

Edgar starts disappearing into the night to do “”family business”” for his totally-not-evil-uncle and I SWEAR to god at the time I was like “this mofo’s deadass going around murdering people” and now I’m just like .... ha ha.

One day Alice stumbles across Edgar coming home from “”family business”” and rushes out to greet him, only for him to freak the fuck out and hide his hands behind his back. SERIOUSLY I THOUGHT HIS HANDS WERE BLOOD SOAKED. Alice’s like wtf you doing and yanks his hands out only to find them freezing cold BECAUSE HE WAS BUSY WASHING THE BLOOD OFF OF THEM.

This is one of my favourite scenes JUST.... WARMTH... THE TENDERNESS.... THE FONDNESS.... THE SHEER AFFECTION SHE HAS FOR HIM IS SO MAGNETIZING. The god damn romantic connotations is overflowing it’s practically on the same level as a damn love confession without the actual confession of love.

I love that sort of duality between their relationship being built on fake premises, but is actually very genuine at its core. Edgar may have saved Alice with ulterior motives, but his kindness towards her both when they first met and their interactions after that was very real. It’s through little things in the writing like Alice commenting on how Edgar’ hands were warm that makes it all the more endearing and heart wrenching.

AGAIN--OH NO MY BABY DON’T SAY THAT PLEASE.

lmao never change, Jonah. Never change.

narrator: she was not fine.

look everything in this game may be a rip off but those LI-perspective side stories are just..............IT’S OKAY MY HEART IS ALREADY MADE OF DIAMOND.

Anyhoo the war between the two armies are starting to get Heated Up™ and Edgar requests Lancelot to go scouting in enemy territory alone, but Lancelot refuses bc it’s dangerous. Honestly idk what’s so dangerous about it considering how Sirius’s route was pretty much Edgar vs Black Army and the Black Army still had trouble but ANYWAY. Alice finds out and gets pissed and they end up arguing, to which everyone starts celebrating and clinking wine glasses in toasts because “holy shit Edgar actually has emotions?!” 😂😂

MY GUY LOL WHAT IS THIS.

In Edgar’s route, you don’t say “I love you”, you say THIS. SERIOUSLY MY HEART HURTS SO BAD ESPECIALLY WITH THE CONTEXT OF EDGAR’S CHARACTER AND THE STORY OF THIS ROUTE.

After Edgar’s leaves on his scouting trip Claudius decides it’s a good time to come out into the limelight and ruin some people’s lives for fun so he sends Alice a letter going like “yo here’s a plot convenient key to Edgar’s safe where he keeps his weed stash so you can see the truth that your boyfriend is a PIECE OF SHIT”. And Alice is all like “ay Edgar isn’t a piece of shit, I’m sure this is just a prank!”

too bad it isn’t.

Zero takes Alice to Edgar’s safe and seriously I was on the edge of my seat wondering wtf was in his safe. I suspected it was gonna be her belongings but with the suspense they kept building in this part I wouldn’t have been surprised if there were fucking dead bodies in that locker.

So on the bright side, there were no dead bodies in the safe. On the not so bright side, Alice finds all the letters she wrote to the Black Army, as well as warning letters from them she never received so it turned out Edgar was fabricating the letters she was exchanging with the Black Army all this time. OH GOODIE.

GAHHHH NO EDGAR.

SERIOUSLY can we talk about how good the writing in this route is?!? All the dialogue and monologues are just structured in a way that gets to my emotions. I fucking cried during this scene because Alice’s emotions and despair was so raw and powerful and the way Edgar just silently took all her verbal abuse because he couldn’t defend himself but he was breaking with every word she said ...... ABLHEAJTARTHEATHJAEKHT.

Anyway Alice miraculously somehow escapes the Red Army Headquarters and races back to the Black Army in one piece seriously girl did you run an entire evening without stopping to black territory??? Adrenaline mixed with terror is something only for the surprise plot convenience robbers to make a reappearance. Fortunately, our MVP Luka dashingly swoops in and saves her. He brings her back to Black Territory and cooks her dinner and is there to comfort her MPH...BABY BOY IS SO SOFT AND SWEET...................

Alice completely breaks down and ME FUCKING TOO. She can’t really say much other than a strangled sob of “You know Luka, I had a lot of fun at the Red Army. Edgar treated me really, really well” or something like that and honestly that’s also she really needed to say to convey her heartbreak and betrayal.

lol I can imagine Edgar doing that.

THANKS I’M FUCKING DEPRESSED NOW.

Luka reveals that he and Edgar were long time friends and muses to Alice on what he’s known about Edgar throughout the years. He drops this information on Alice not to necessarily tell her how to feel, but just as food for thought for Alice as she sorts out her feelings.

THANKS I’M EVEN MORE FUCKING DEPRESSED NOW. Also this is hands down the most powerful admittance of love this game has given me.

lmao never change Seth, never change.

Anyhoo Claudius McDoucheMuffin gets into contact with Alice and is all like “hey girl I got your purse.” And for some reason, Alice thinks he’s perfectly trustworthy ¯\_(ツ)_/¯¯.

ALICE....ABOUT THAT....

OH NO.

Well yeah what do you know ha ha, Claudius kidnaps Alice because THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS EVERY FUCKING TIME THE BLACK ARMY SENDS A NAMELESS BODYGUARD OUT TO PROTECT HER.

Claudius takes Alice to outside Amon’s sex dungeon where Edgar is there lovingly waiting for her. Edgar is slightly surprised to see Alice and is rurl pissed over his daddy uncle manhandling her so he makes Claudius give them some alone time in the carriage while he removes Alice’s ropes and dresses her wounds. Alice isn’t keen on it but she realizes that “holy shit Claudius may be a bigger piece of shit than Edgar” so she lets him spill his token tragic backstory to her.

This is so god damned painful.......

jesus christ this puts the whole “In the Bright family, loving people is practically forbidden” into context.

This makes me wonder what would become of Edgar in the other routes where his pact isn’t abolished-- would he really marry if this was the fate he knew his wife and children would go through, or would he just stay single and let his lineage die with him?

Unfortunately, their touching reunion doesn’t last long because Claudius is pretty much banging on their carriage door going like

“time’s up bitches we got work to do” and pretty much barges in and yanks Alice away from Edgar.

Bring it, asshat.

Claudius unceremoniously marches Alice straight into the thick of Amon’s sex dungeon while Edgar reluctantly dallys along with the Concerned Kermit Face the entire time. Amon pretty much ditches Lance for his new buddy Claudius so they can TAKE OVER THE WORLD HUR DUR. Him and Claudius cackle about their evil plans and Alice realizes that Edgar was more or less being manipulated by them and he’s not the Actual Worst. Amon then orders Alice to be thrown into his Personal Chambers™.

Jesus christ, YOU ARE SUCH AN ASS, CLAUDIUS.

DON’T MIND ME I’M JUST BEING EMO.

We cut back to Amon and Alice and Amon does his typical evil villain monologue, takes off his hood and....

(屮゜Д゜)屮(屮゜Д゜)屮(屮゜Д゜)屮 HE HAS A CHARACTER DESIGN?!?!?!?!

I KID YOU NOT THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME I SAW AMON WITHOUT HIS HOOD AND I WAS SHOOKED TO MY FUCKING BONES. I DIDN’T THINK HE’D ACTUALLY HAVE A PROPER CHARACTER DESIGN. It was three in the morning when I played this and I literally just put my phone down and laid in my bed staring at the ceiling as I contemplated my life choices after that.

After that shocking revelation, Amon throws Alice into the dungeons for Edgar to dashingly swoop in and save. It’s the full moon so he takes her to the gates of hell Hole That No Player Ever Wants To See. Now if this was a black army route, the suitor would have thrown Alice’s sad ass straight down that hole but this isn’t a black army route so we’re spared from that. Instead we have Alice CHUCKING ALL OF HER POSSESSIONS INTO THE HOLE ((((；゜Д゜))), effectively sealing her fate of ever going back. I get it’s supposed to be a power move but my only thoughts were “WHAT IF EDGAR DIDN’T ACTUALLY RETURN YOUR FEELINGS LMAO?!” I mean it’s an otome game so of course Edgar loves her back but can you imagine how awkward it’d be if Alice was like “I’m not going back because I love you!” and Edgar’s just like “...but I don't feel the same”. YEESH.

On a less superficial level, I was still really sad because didn’t they make a promise to go to London together one day? ໒( •́ ∧ •̀ )७ I know it wasn’t really a promise but still! Chances are all gone now.

Edgar: Alice, I’m an actual murderer. Alice: NAH, YOU’RE JUST A WEIRDO, EDGAR! (´∩｡• ᵕ •｡∩`) ♡

I AM SO FUCKING EMO.

Also!!! HE’S THE ONLY BOY SO FAR WHO HAS A KISS CG IN HIS ROUTE. (haven’t played Ray’s route yet so idk about him). You have all these Spicy CGs of the boys and Alice in sexually compromising positions and you have Actual Sex Scenes and yet this game barely has any kiss cgs LOL?! What gives?!

He’s so romantic (ఠ్ఠ ˓̭ ఠ్ఠ).

Since Edgar’s officially betrayed Claudius, he pretty much duels him and kicks his ass and arrests him. Unfortunately, arresting Claudius doesn’t absolve Edgar of his crimes and he’s still put on trial with Lancelot and Ray as the judges. This scene kind of weirded me out because Edgar says some mumbo jumbo about how he’s going on trial so he can “become a man worthy of Alice’s love” like uHHH boy you being worthy of her love ain’t gonna mean jack shit if you’re in jail. Unless you want a nice steamy serving of this ending.

Okay I’m not trying to sound like I’m justifying murder but akjheakthake just FLEETING THOUGHTS YA KNOW. This scene was hella predictable and played out exactly like we’d all know (Edgar doesn’t go to jail hurray!) but even still the trial made me SO EMOTIONAL I STARTED CRYING LMAOO.

Oh Jonah, I know a game you’d love.

Romantic Ending:

Now that things finally calmed down, Alice and Edgar go on a date with Luka tagging along and Jonah acting as the fourth wheel, much to Luka’s chagrin. (ღ˘⌣˘ღ) ♫･*:.｡. .｡.:*･

NEVER CHANGE JONAH, NEVER CHANGE.

Out of all the pet names my fictional boyfriend could give me, being called an angel is my number one favourite IT’S JUST SO SOFT AND MAKES MY HEART GO DOKI FUCKING DOKI YA FEEL.

is it a sin that I imagined Edgar going full blown chokemedaddy yandere jealous.... not exactly a romantic thought in the romantic ending, bUT FLEETING THOUGHTS, FLEETING THOUGHTS.

LUKA IS SO GOD DAMN PRECIOUS KILL ME NOW.

AHHH WHY ARE YOU SO CUTE.....

-------

Honestly I’m not even gonna mince words-- I loved this route and everything that came with it.

Before I go on my rampage, shout out to Luka for being the MVP supporting character in Edgar’s route. It’s hard to imagine them being friends considering how clashing their personalities are but their friendship was surprisingly heartwarming and endearing.

I don’t even know how to articulate my thoughts on what made this route so perfect. For starters, Edgar and Alice have amazing chemistry and their personalities compliment each other well. Their bonding and budding friendship was really endearing and felt very believable. From little superficial antics like sharing candy and taking care of animals and going on silly dates, to more blatant portrayals of the depth of their love like Alice cupping Edgar’s hand to her cheek when he was vulnerable, or Edgar straight up betraying his only family to save her.

Alice’s circumstances of being someone from another world really complimented Edgar’s character. Edgar is a character who lived in a gilded cage his entire life--trapped by his occupation and bound by dirty blood. He’s never once known freedom or has ever had any agency over his life, but Alice shatters that equation. Alice is completely unrelated to the Red Army, or Cradle entirely. She knows nothing about his occupation or his history, and so Edgar is drawn to her because there are no division of titles between them. To her, him being the Jack of Hearts is irrelevant.

He says that without her, he gets “bored”. In the game, he complains that he’s “always bored”. Using “bored” to describe a character usually makes that character seem fickle and that they can’t be serious about anything because everything is just a means to kill time. But in the context of Edgar’s character, “bored” really means “dull”, “lifeless”, or “forced to find happiness through short lived and temporary means”. He copes with his oppression and lack of freedom by chalking up all of his feelings as just boredom. And he’s not wrong-- a life where you can’t make any of your own choices or choose your own path is indeed, very boring.

He constantly calls Alice his “special guest” which on top of being an adorable nickname, carries really heavy connotations. She’s an ethereal guest from another world, from outside of Edgar’s tiny world which he always wanted to expand. I LOVED the scene where Alice says she would like to take Edgar to London with her one day, because it’s the first time you see Edgar start to doubt his world. He’s accepted that his world is small and oppressive, but the first time, it’s almost like Edgar entertains the idea of breaking free from his bird cage.

I want to compliment the relationship development between the two, which was WONDERFULLY paced, something that pitifully cannot necessarily be said about in some of the other routes. Them falling in love felt very natural and the writers did not have to rely on shallow monologues like “he breathed in my direction, what is this feeling in my chest?!” to convince me that they were in love with each other. And when the admittance of love finally happens, it happens at very pivotal moments in the story that just makes the scene so much more emotional.

Freaking 3k+ words and I still don’t think I did Edgar’s route justice. His route was amazingly written, and Edgar is an amazingly multifaceted and endearing character. Best boy truly got best route.

Anyway I’m almost done Loki’s route; Ray is next. After that, the routes I’m REALLY looking forward to and hope do not disappoint are: Harr, Seth, Kyle, and Luka.

#ikemen revolution #edgar bright #ellie plays ikerev terribly #ellie plays

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kuresoto · 7 years

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RFFA: More Than Love Recs

I’m such a slow reader and this week is going to be crazy busy for me but here are some recs from The Great Reylo Fic Drop™ from @reylofanfictionanthology

I was gifted two fics!

Flowers for Every Season Rey uses her skills as a florist to help Hux woo a girl at his law firm despite the interference of his harsh boss, Kylo Ren. Modern AU. (I absolutely adored this, it hit all my fluff desires and had me grinning like an asshole at work :3)

Empire Boulevard 1960s AU where Ben works for First Order security and Rey for a flower shop! They fall for each other at a New Year's Eve masquerade party and the rest is...well you'll see! (Currently 2 chapters up but I’m excited to see where it goes!)

Some that I’ve read so far!

Double Exposure Find the secret lab in the wreck of the Supremacy. Destroy anything she cannot steal. Simple enough orders, even if she has to make it through Kylo Ren to do it. Astronavigation is impossible in a world made of blurred lines, but that doesn’t matter. The Supremacy will never move again. Rey is going to make sure of it. (#sex dreams but it's real because of The Force)

Kind Stranger Ben stares at the text for a minute before opening up his computer and typing “+7793 area code” into his web search. Jakku. Of course he wouldn’t have recognized it. He confessed himself surprised to know that Jakku even had an area code. Did people still live in Jakku? (this fucked me up and made me cry actual real tears wtf)

Remedy After years of living on the brink of starvation, Rey finally has a safe place with the Resistance to call home. As she adjusts to her new environment, her body has some of its own adjusting to do... (ok i’m p sure i know who wrote this, and boi i love it)

Crawl Under Your Skin "Underneath his forehead, beneath her skin, a heat wave’s been building in Rey's lower belly, smoothing and constricting, pushing and pulling on elastic tendrils. Kylo can pinpoint the exact moment when it shatters." (this is the most poetic fic i’ve ever read of kylo eating out rey like wow)

The things one learns Undercover at a Hutt's slave auction, Rey finds herself the new owner of a rather dazed Ben Solo. Shenanigans ensue. (ok but their interactions is so cute)

Currently reading

Causality Kylo Ren has been kidnapped, drugged, and forced into sex slavery by the Hutts. Rey is sent to rescue him, posing as a client, and ordered to do whatever it takes to get him back.And she isn’t prepared for how devastating this mission will be.

Holonet Mail Two work rivals, who despise each other, unknowingly fall in love as they exchange letters through the holonet.

Truth Be Told “Do you even know who you’re working for?” He taunted.She wiped a smear of blood from her lip. “Don’t worry, we’re the good guys.” Spying a workbench nearby, Rey picked up a screwdriver to use as a weapon. This man was relentless.“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” Alias AU: Rey is an agent with SD-6, a secret branch of the CIA. But a chance encounter with the mysterious agent Kylo Ren could send everything she knows crashing to the ground. Could she be working for the very enemy she thought she was fighting? (Quick interjection in that i’m excited af for this bc Alias was my high school childhood)

Can We Pretend? When Rey attends her brother Finn's wedding, to Poe, her single status makes wandering eyes follow her. But, when Ben Solo gives her a choice, that provides her with a way to enjoy the weekend, Rey accepts being Ben's fake fiance for a peaceful week.

Years and Years Or, five times Ben Solo wanted to ask Rey out and one time he did.

Carnivore “What’s wrong, sweetheart? The rebels not feeding you enough?” His thumb brushed across her swollen lower lip. Rey nipped at the tip, unable to resist. Ben chuckled. “My poor Rey. You finally escape starvation on that Maker-forsaken planet only to end up right back in its clutches.” His voice was as dark and thick as raw honey, and Rey whined as he moved out of range of her mouth, a teasing smirk curling one side of his lips. “Don’t worry, little one. I’ll make sure you’re satisfied.”

Holes in the Stories They Told As the bond takes Kylo and Rey deeper into each other, they discover how lies from their pasts directed their futures. But destiny will not bow to a lie.

tear your world apart Rey’s on a mission to kidnap Kylo Ren, bring him home, but it all goes sideways when he takes a blow meant to end her life. She’s his only lifeline now and the messy aftermath will change both of their lives.

Five Perspectives Over The Years Five different perspectives on Ben Solo/Kylo Ren and Rey's relationship with one another at different times throughout the years.

we fill the gaps (you and me make three) He has become hers, he’s the only thing that truly belongs to her only in this desert where everyone wants everything and selfishness is spread through the hearts of its inhabitants like a sickness.

it goes round and round (everything falling) again and again, she slips from his grasp like moonlight (reincarnation au where ben seeks her through their past lives and maybe, just maybe this time this time will be the last)

unexpected For many reasons, Rey isn't the typical tribute given to Kylo Ren as emperor. He's perfectly ready to be rid of her, but she's not sure she agrees.

A Path Chosen Rey. Master of the Knights of Ren, a woman of legend and tales, who took her own Master and bent him to her heel. A terror and a blessing swathed in black wraps; his savior from the endless wastes of Jakku who currently wanted nothing but him to fall in line.But Ben Solo wasn’t one to fall easily. ------- Ben Solo was left behind on Jakku. It wasn't long before he was found by Rey, Master of the Knights of Ren, who promised him a better life and an inheritance he couldn't ignore.

Clean Hands, Light Heart Rey knows how cruel you need to be, to get things clean.She doesn't want to be cruel, though.

every inch between us becomes light years She is Rey of nothing, of nobody, of nowhere, and she is so in tune with the Force that there is no room in her for anything else.

Again, I’m a slow-ass reader and my phone will one day just shut down and fuck me up by deleting my tabs sighs

More Than Love AO3 Collection

#reylo #reylofanfiction #more than love #rey x kylo #reylo fic rec #it's my husbands bday this week so i'm legit s w a m p e d ;-;

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dontmindmedear · 7 years

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Rare Pair Dragon Rider AU

Notes:

pairings may be changed to one’s liking, but keeping them rare pairs would be preferable

individual stories and story development is free for interpretation and changeable

Seriously, this is all just a raw draft. Change it as you like

tbh I just thought this up bc I wanted Bokuto to fuck Oikawa with golden glowing Dragon eyes. Sue me

Dragons:

females:

wild ones live away from humans, in peace. humans don’t hurt them, they stay away from what belongs to humans. occasionally one of them brings an egg to a breeder station on the outskirts as a present and sign of friendship. in exchange, the baby will be brought back to its wild flock if they can't seem to be integrated

living in the breeder station: most of them were born here. by the time they were able to decide whether to get paired with a rider or stay, they developed the desire to breed or take care of young ones. others didn’t want to leave their breeders side, as the breeders have a closer Relationship with them as they have with the male dragons (after all they need their absolute trust for when their instincts run wild during pregnancy)

a female that chose the rider way mostly ends up in the teaching area after obligatory military service, since they calm the young once easier, or are in the spy area.

males:

wild ones protect their flocks. do not fight. do not tease. do not underestimate. do not walk too close. they will fight to death if they feel threatened. they rarely go close to human areas.

breeded ones need to go to the academy. mostly to get their instincts under control, away from all the females, and to have a way to get rid if their energy.

since ‘protect’ is part of their instincts, most of them stay in the military or teach younger ones how to protect. a grown a male Dragon has no problems keeping a younger one under control, especially once they earnt their respect with behaviour or actions.

the calmer ones might help out in the town with house building or street safety or work within the city.

A bonded Dragon:

loses interest in breeding. (another reason why not many bonded Dragons are female) therefore they might help to protect the breeding stations and give the females a sense of safety. (some breeding stations see it as mandatory for their breeders to have a bonded Dragon).

they can communicate telepathically with their human and can find them wherever they are. (their mark is like a gps)

their rider is the most important thing for them. nothing, neither Dragon nor human nor lovers nor hobby nor obligation, is of higher importance

Pairings: (D = Dragon, R = Rider)

OiBoku Iwa D + Noya Daichi D + Aka (due to DaiSugas Relationship, Daichi often flies with Suga and Akaashi has to change his style to match Daichi better, which leaves him hesitant and uncertain (when he and daichi fly alone, and Akaashi trusts him enough, he would often let go and spread his arms, enjoying the wind and trusting Daichi completely) SugaKuro (DaiSugas Relationship wasnt a problem for Kuroo, until their telepathy started and he got literal smutty hc. he kinda short circuited, growled and called Suga ‘HIS’ before leaving utterly embarrassed. DaiSuga talked and decided it might be better to break up after all) Kags D + Yahaba (Kags is from Oiks ranch/breeding farm and initiating class. Oiks wants to teach Yaba in managing kags, but Yahaba only smiles) Kai +Asahi D (first AsaOiBoku, but then Kai 'loses' his old dragon, so he’s given Asahi since A rider cannot get bounded to two Dragons) Tsukki + Lev D (Tsukki was really annoyed by him at first, but after seeing him failing and failing again without giving up and finally getting results, he got interested/felt himself being happy with him and somehow got motivated to train and get better as well) KyouKen D + Shirabu (know each other from the initiating classes. are like bitch besties. both have a tough image but a sweet core)

Goshiki D + Kunimi Tendou D + Daishou (‘Monster Duo’. Don't underestimate. Don't anger. Don't provoke.)

Kenma + Yamamoto D (kenma can sharpen his eyesight to "zoom in") Hinata + Tanaka D (hinata can breath fire)

the flock troublemakers refused to let the flock babies out of their sight

both Hinata and Kenma are humans with Dragon blood due to their ancestors. they are cousins

Semi + Aone D; shiba + Yams D; Inuoka D + Sakunami (shiba’s twin)

Fukunaga + Kuguri D (people assume they use telepathy since they both rarely talk)

Yaku + Kindaichi D (yaku is mothering him a lot. since Lev was too young and troublesome, the leader refused to let go of Lev yet and Yaku needed a new Dragon partner. he was switched to Aoba in the meanwhile, and eventually chose Kinchi for the next test. kinkuni wanted to stay a pair, but already realised that wouldnt be possible, so they held their eyes open for other options)

Free/without partners:

Terushima R (initially enemy)

Sakusa (veteran Dragon)

hoshiumi D

Miya Atsumu

Miya Osamu

yamagata R

kawanishi D Flock Leaders: Ennoshita+Futakuchi Makki+Konoha Ushiwaka+Mattsun (Ushiwaka would love to fly with Oiks and takes Mattsun's humour seriously. Mattsun likes that) Watari+Komi Enemies: Wakunan Johzenji (spies)

Higher-Ups/Elders: Ukai (d) got hurt in the last mission while protecting the new teachers and flock leaders, flew down bc his rider got hurt and got himself hurt in the process. reason why this year a tight relationship between rider and dragon is seen as a bad thing Takeda (r) he limps and cannot fly for a long time anymore Nekomata (d) Ukai senior (d) Mizoguchi (d) Irihata (r) Washijou (r) at fault for proposing the new system after UkaTake incident happened Teachers: Moniwa (raising Dragons, socialising w/ dragons, has the problem class) Kamazaki (flight training) D Washio (Fighting, Swords) D Saeko (flame useage/control) D Narita (d, spionage) the supermarket dude (R, spionage) the tech shop dude (fighting Martial Arts) = R Sarukui (transformation) = D Kiyoko (in charge of the Dragons and their caves. no one is allowed into the restricted area without her seal) = magic seal (D) teaches them inside the caves sometimes (has crystal blue shimmering scales) Managers (general education as well as taking care of their students) Michimiya (d, general education for Dragons) Yachi is a teacher (teaches Dragon health) and doctor for Dragons/healer

Flocks:

people in the Kitagawa Daiichi School: (within the group they often switch partners) the groups are parted due to age (age gap up to one year) Group 1: Daichi (d) Oiks (r) Iwa (d) Suga (r) Kuroo (d) Yaku (r) Boku (d) (Akaashi is from Bo's ranch. as long as he's there, bo's fine. that's why he isn't in group 4) Akaashi (r) Group 2: Tendou (d) Aone (d) Daishou (r) Semi (r) Kyou (d) (will join group 4 later) Kenma (r) Yahaba (r) Kuguri (d) Group 3: Goshiki (d) Tsukki (r) Yams (d) Kageyama (d) Kunimi (r) Kindaichi (d) Inuoka(d) Fukunaga (r) Shibayama (r)

Sakunami (r)

Group 4: they all joined a year later due to their 'mental age' (too aggro, too shy or simply unable to sit still and listen properly) Tana (d) Tora (d) Asahi (d) Noya (r) shirabu (r) too salty (dragon rider family. refuses to listen to people of a lower rank than his parents) Hinata (r) Lev (d) they had a 4th R, but he got very very ill soon and had to stop (dragophobie) every 'flock' is made up of people who applied within a certain time frame, are of similar age and who live close to each other. (the dragon mother decides who will take care of her baby, as she abondons it after laying the egg. these mothers can be wild, but friendly dragons, active dragons from active riders or breeding dragons (voluntarily. like to be pregnant or to help out))

Kuroo, Daichi, Iwa, Kags and Kuni are Dragons from Oiks ranch. Suga and Yaku are childhood friends who lived nearby, same for Kindaichi. Kuroo&Daichi are twins. they like to compete and yaku/suga have to stop them. (active Dragonrider parents) Kags and Iwa have the same Dragon mother (wild Dragon. thus if they dont get along with the others they will be sent back into the wilderness. The Dragon Rider School Licence is absolutely necessary for them), but their eggs were taken care of by different people (Oiks parents had their hands full, so they could only take in Iwa). TanaTora are also twins. Kyou’s 'father' was TanaTake's father’s brother or maybe even the same Dragon, but he was hatched on another farm. (at least that's what the breeders assumed since their mothers were wild; similar features and behaviour but no one is sure whether they were really the same Dragon) first real flock (till final exam): (there are tests to determine whether you join a flock, which one, or whether you have to wait half a year. depending on your behaviour you might lose your spot too. over the stretch of the following year, new people can join until all 10 spots are full) AOBA The Allrounder Senior Pair: Makki+Konoha Juniors: Iwa d Oik r Kuni r Kinchi d Yaba r Kyou d + 4 others KARASUNO The hotblooded/energetic ones/creativity Senior pair: Ennoshita+Futakuchi Juniors: Dai D Suga r Tana d Noya r Asa d Hina r Kags d Tsukki r Yams d Kinoshita r NEKOMA The collected ones Senior Pair: Watari+Komi Juniors: Kuroo D Kenma R Tora D Inu D Shiba R Fukunaga R Lev D Yaku R Daishou R

Kuguri D SHIRATORIZAWA The tricky ones (one main attribute) Senior Pair: Ushiwaka+Mattsun Juniors: Tendou d Semi r Shirabu r Goshiki d Aone d Bokuto d Akaashi r Hoshiumi d

Sakunami r +1 rider kai (r) different School/group and older. close to official partnership with his dragon

Story: (story starts from ~first flock to the final exams)

the senior pairs talk about which group they get, with which members, during breakfast/lunch. everyone pities enno. (no one pities futakuchi) most envy ushimatsu. they have the calm ones. (they also have Bo, but he's 'controlled' by Akaashi. Tendou isn’t really a problem. Mattsun actually is really happy about him. 'he'll make sure no one gets too serious') they talk about how lucky they are that 'the old guys' don’t get involved this year. last year's group were kinda forced into partnering with a dragon just bc they were free/thought they suited each other. WataKomi get Nekoma (aka the collected ones). Komi is thrilled to see whether they are really always collected. "But don’t overdo it, okay? we dont wanna scare them off." Watari glances at Komi and just chuckles at his motivated posture. MakkiKono get the Allrounder. everyone makes jokes of Konoha as 'the jack of all trades but master of none'. "the most important thing is to make them see it's ok not to be the best in sth. I think there are some guys though who won’t like this" *dirty grin* "we'll make sure they won’t get too serious"

Every member of the new flocks thinks they’ll get partnered up with the ones they had been partnering with since they got sorted into flocks, but then the incident with Ukai and Takeda happens and they’re informed that they have to switch. Obviously none of them is pleased about that, their mentors even try to argue against it, but order is order. Most are hesitant at first but eventually give in. Only Oikawa and Iwaizumi still refuse, bc they grew up together, Oikawa had even watched Iwaizumi hatching, and they had sworn at a young age that they would do this together. So now not being allowed to do that hurts them both deeply and they try to fight the order, which brings Iwaizumi in trouble since he might be expelled and sent into the wilderness if he keeps acting like that. Therefore, out of worry for his friend, Daichi and Iwa have a talk about what it means to switch Riders. Daichi and Iwaizumi: "You dont wanna fly with Sugawara anymore?" "Oh, I still do! I do want to fly with him." "then why do you allow someone else to ride you? why do you consider to replace him?" Daichi chuckles. "replacing? is that how it seems to you? no, iwaizumi, no. that is wrong! Im not 'replacing' Suga or anything. No one can replace Suga! He's been my best friend and partner ever since I entered this school. and nothing and no one will ever change that." "then why-" "because! taking another rider doesnt diminish or change my feelings for Suga. It wont diminish or destroy anything. Choosing a different Rider, simply means that there will be someone who will mean even more to me someday than Suga does now. and Akaashi is totally worth to be that one." "... I cannot believe that could ever happen to me. there is no way that anyone could ever mean more to me than Oikawa does to me now." More chuckling. "bc you're stubborn! you both are. you're so concentrated, focused, centered on each other that there is no way anyone could ever reach that same level of synchronized trust and compatibility. You and Oikawa have spend YEARS to create the bond you share now. you cannot expect a bond, that is as deep and strong as yours, to appear over night. you have to give it time. if you don’t allow others to come near you, if you don’t allow yourself to feel close to others, if you don’t even consider to give them a choice, then it'll never happen anyway. that's just the way it is." "..." after Iwa finally gives in he still has a hard time to adapt to others but noya breaks into his heart like a lil whirlwind (he fights with dragons and wins lmao) oiks feels betrayed and refuses to talk with Iwa, which upsets Iwa and therefore Noya. Noya has a 'talk' with Oiks during a time frame where he doesn’t have a potential partner yet (the teachers don’t know what to do with him), so he practices with Ushi who would love to have him as a 2nd rider (Mattsun is a bit miffed, but as that would mean more free time for him and more time with makki and konoha and he's really sure oiks would never accept that offer, so he's all chill about it) and helps out with the hatchlings as he's a really skilled rider. Oiks gets another view on the situation and takes some time off to go home to calm down. when he comes back he's offered to train with Asahi and Boku, as they complement each other, kinda. he's a bit confused at first, only one of them would have been ok, until he realises, that they are the only ones without a partner since both are problematic and their preferred partners are already in a partnership.

Oikawa: Grew up on a Ranch for breeding Dragons, wants to take it over one day. therefore he needs a Dragon Rider License which he can only get after completing the Dragon Rider school.

He was 6~10 (probably 8?) when Iwa hatched and sees in him a younger brother who tries to act more mature than he is. They went to the school together and were in the same initiating class. theoretic riding classes, fighting lessons and later classes like taking care of the dragons they might group up with. Plus basic classes like math and writing. Then they both join the Aoba Jousai flock.

After their "final exam" they were forced into different groups, bc they care about e.o. too much (= possible disobeying of orders in case of injury or panics or loss of concentration and Coolness). Oikawa already interacted with Kags and Daichi during their time at Kitagawa and with Kindaichi at Aoba, so they didn’t try to match him up with them, but tried other setups, which he obviously hindered by refusing to cooperate properly. (OiKuni, OiYaba, OiHina as mentor!Oiks and oiakasuga friendship) 1.OiKuro (shortly, would have lasted longer if Oiks weren't so focused on Iwa) 2.OiTen (Oiks dislikes him and kinda manipulates their work together, but tendou surprisingly manages to guess their moves anyway and they work surprisingly good together. Oiks refuses to work with him after a while though)

3.(OiTana/OiTora) shortly mentioned, doesn't end well bc they can't deal with his attitude 4.OiBoku (was supposed to be a matter of showing Oikawa who holds the reign in the school hierarchy, kinda, but they end up working surprisingly very well together. Oiks is annoyed and sees this as punishment, yet makes the best out of it to prevent further provocations.) 5.OiLev (the coaches wanted to see if he can get along with all problem children. He can. He does. He refuses anyone but iwa. Iwa's talk with Daichi happens.) 6.OiAsa (Oiks is the only one who can bring his potential out, besides Noya and a few others from Karasuno. Iwa sees Noya fights with dragons and IwaNoya gets serious.) 7.Oikawa finds out about IwaNoya and he's kind of pissed at Iwa. Oiks then refuses anymore dragon pairings and starts working with the nearby hatchlings 8.OiUshi (shortly, Oikawa talks with Noya) - Oiks time out - feat. Oikawa flashback of Iwaizumi's birth OiBoku (end pair) = he looks like a starry night sky (Black scales with white dots) At first in a combo with OiAsa, like, Asahi is scared of flying mostly blind at night. (at least Oiks is mostly blind) or Boku cannot fly during the day (bc he’s too easy to notice, same as Kuroo and Daichi) Iwaizumi: Needs to attend the School for Dragons to be allowed to stay in the city and vicinity. otherwise he would be thrown out. Sees Oiks as a baby that cries when he gets a scratch (on his face) and who always needs to be protected bc he cannot do anything on his own. Oiks might have been born first, but Dragons grow faster, so he sees himself as the older one. is threatened to be thrown out of school after being separated from Oiks, which would have greater disadvantages for him than pros. they still meet at night to fly together though, until their Noya disagreement. (tho their nightly adventures lessen before the argument, bc Iwa starts to take Noya serious and Oiks ... Iwa doesn’t know how to tell him)

Dragons learn in the initial classes how to use and control their fire, how to change to human form and to get used to all kinds of smells and being touched and so on. (after they learn to use their human form they attend general education classes with the younger human classes.) During the initial lasses, Iwa interacts with Suga often and during Aoba often with Kunimi, when he isn’t paired up with Oikawa which is really rare IwaKuni (Aoba), SugaIwa (kitagawa) 1.IwaAka (Shortly) 2.IwaKen or IwaShirabu 3.SemiIwa 4.IwaNoya (final combo) = Iwa feels the need to protect him, but Noya is always so full of energy and often gets hurt by fighting dragons in human forms so Iwa kinda gets used to it (actual uses a leash on him sometimes.)

AsaBokuOi:

Bo is really clingy and cuddly, always all over Oiks, bc Oikawa is his last chance on not being seen as a failure, who after being startled and surprised at first (“he wasn't that clingy when i was paired with him the first time”) doesn't mind so much after a while. (occasionally it's Oiks who surprises Bo and slings his arms around Bo's neck or waist from behind or scratches soft spots under his scales (esp when they are still 3 and Oiks returns from a long ride with Asahi, leaving Bo bored with the other riders/dragons) Bo is more than happy to have a rider who returns his cuddles/signs of affection) Bo loves flying at night, but he has problems with the day (the sun hurts his eyes, “owls also fly only at night and they are perfect hunters”, someone told him its annoying how obvious his pattern is on the daysky ...) Asahi is more hesitant and always jumps and flinches when Oiks (and Bo) surprise him or cuddle with him suddenly (cuddly AsaBoku in Dragon form when Oiks is busy and returns late. Oiks still helps out with the new hatchlings at times) he enjoys the affection though and returns them (though never in public) he loves flying during the day, but is scared of the night (his rider doesn't have his night vision afterall so it's dangerous and he's afraid he could miss out on stuff) People often look down on Oiks bc he doesn't have a real partner yet (his favourite had rejected him too) and just the 2 problem children who seem more like kindergarten children when Oiks is with them (always needy of/searching for attention and approval).

No one knew that AsaBoku could get so scary after they overheard them. even as dragons they never were actively acting scary or threatening. In that case though everyone thought they would kill the poor guys. Oikawa’s the one who accepted them/took them in when nobody wanted the, even if he was kinda forced, but he still always praises them and showers them with his affection and they really appreciate everything he does for them. (Oiks is really surprised by their actions and forgets almost to call them back before sth bad happens. he's really ... happy? relieved? afterwards though and calms the 2 dragons who are suddenly scared they overdid it and Oiks hates them now) OiBoku make a lot of 'Riding the Dragon' jokes once they started to cross the line. it starts while Asa is still with them. It wasn’t uncommon for them to kiss e.o.’s cheeks or their hair but then Boku kisses Oiks on his mouth while Asa isn't there, to both of their surprise (he doesn't do it again, but he often finds himself wishing to do so. Oiks notices and allows him to do it, but only when they are alone, and blushes as he says so) and starts to mark him with his scent stronger than before (he actually started before that unconsciously as well, since it’s an instinct thing) Asahi is confused at first, bc the smell gets stronger only over time, but he gets the signal and wants to back off, but he also doesn't want to let go of his rider. Usually they can live with it quite well, but sometimes Bo suddenly snarls when Asahi gets too touchy-feely (matter of personal definition of “too touchy-feely”) and it's getting tense and Oiks soon realises it could become dangerous when they get too riled up. He talks with Akaashi and Noya, but none of them are familiar with their current territorial behaviour, since they never were in a situation where losing their rider was an actual option. Not like this at least. Oikawa decides it might be the best to settle down, to make his final decision… to let one of them go. He can't let the chance of things escalating and them being expelled become reality. While he's gone to talk with the seniors and leaders, Iwaizumi makes AsaBoku 'talk' about it themselves(Noya told him about Oiks predicament). Together they figure out Bo's true feelings for Oiks, which aren't the same as Asahi's. Asa is allowed to ride with him, but only during the day. At night he's Bokuto’s Rider. Cuddling and other signs of affections are allowed. (But Bo always makes sure his scent is the strongest).

[There is a cliffhanger with Oiks in front of the rider building, hesitating to enter, when Takeda walks up to him. “can i help you with sth?” Oiks only stares. Chapter end.] After a while Iwa mentions it to Oiks, he's worried, and they talk about it and Oiks feelings. he tells him to do what his feelings tell him to, but he has to make his feelings clear to the others and be true to them. Iwa promises to go back to their breeder station with him and Noya when their obligatory military time is over, which was one of Oiks greatest fears and wishes. (Iwa would then work in the area of calming wild Dragons down to let someone heal them or to calm a nervous pregnant Dragon down that doesn't trust humans during pregnancy) (Akaashi has quite a few of these talks with Bo himself, but Akaashi never tells him the meaning of his feelings bc he thought Bokuto knew already. 'he always was aware he liked me when he spoke to me or talked about me like that'. the first time it happened he was shocked and perplexed. daichi would tease him about watching the baby leave the nest. akaashi tells him to shut up and actually sniffles a bit to Daichi's amusement.) they find a new routine and when the call comes that their seniors have found a new potential rider (kai) they are shocked (Oiks forgot about it), but then they are kinda relieved yet disappointed and sad. they haven't decided who it would be, so both of them ride with the new one. Bo first, who actually behaves well (Oiks made sure he would. also, Bokuto doesn’t want to be a bother for Oikawa), but as soon as kai rides with Asa it's obvious who it would be. Oiks finds himself walking to Asahi's cave (the one for trainees without connected apartment for riders) and is embarrassed when he turns around halfway there, remembering he doesn’t have to go there anymore, and meets/runs into kai. after a quick talk (kai is very understanding about it and offers to meet up in their free time) Oikawa goes to bo's cave. they weren’t together the last night bc that felt wrong and Oikawa wasn’t really concentrating anyway. “can you believe that? I actually went to his cave earlier and ran right into kai! how embarrassing.” “you don’t have to go there anymore…” “I know that myse-” “you are mine now. only mine. and I won’t let you go anymore.” Oikawa blushes (“...un...” and you are mine now. my Dragon.) and they end up cuddling the rest of the day and fly at night (they are all experienced enough to train on their own after their last exams and don’t need classes anymore, tho they are assigned to other flocks in the meantime, whose leaders keep an eye on their development while they help out the new recruits. they will only be integrated into the military preparation classes after choosing a permanent partner though and moving to the partnered caves.) (in the military classes they have to choose a 'major' after a certain introduction time. Waka wants them in his offensive team, but Oiks chooses spionage/sneak attack, bc of bo's night advantage. (when they have to advance during the day they move with Bo in human form. most people cannot think of them as dangers with their open, amiable, funny streak and Bo being so ... noticeable/conspicuous) Iwa's not pleased with that. IwaNoya are in the offensive back up team. they are more “last defense line”-ish though) As soon as Asa moved out of his trainee cave to become Kai's permanent partner(Or a few weeks after they partnered up and started training together), OiBoku send in the request to be paired officially as well. (Oiks asks Bo why he hadn't done it prior yet, while they were watching the sun going down, and Bo answers that would have been rude towards Asahi. Oikawa’s amazed Bo can show such a matureside. that night Oiks didn’t 'ride' Bo. (at least not public) a week later they move to the caves for official pairs as well the official training can get really dangerous occasionally, bc they are allowed to use any means possible during classes and they might actually get hurt. this gets really dangerous for Noya and Bo. (whenever they come back from field training, tests or a low rank mission it's common for pairs to spend like 2 days with each other to let the adrenaline run dry. noya and bo can be seen together on the 2nd day outside of their assigned caves without their partners (there was this one time where Oiks got a scratch on his cheek by a bird they didn’t see... or that other time where a 'spear' or arrow that had scratched Iwa's side... they don’t talk about it out loud, but they dont really wanna be in the others vicinity when they come to check up during the 2nd day (sometimes when they come back early they find Oiks/iwa without a tee, the others hands pressed against the skin. they know better than to get jealous or angry. though they are more clingy when the other is gone (especially boku who has to scent mark Oiks all over again) )

Obligatory Military years:

During a spy mission OiBoku travel by foot several days before their planned attack or just as a routine. (they only fly there when they arrive at night, but even then without saddle and bo has to let Oiks off before changing back (sometimes he changes back before so he can catch Oiks in his arms. he failed once. since then Oiks always gets grumpy when he does it)

they walk through a forest, not sure whether they are on the right track, when they see a campfire (it's getting dark). they join them (they are really hostile at first but calm down after seeing how dirty and tired and so not spy like they are (the readers don’t know about oibokus major then POV of the guards around the fire) ) and talk about random stuff, talk about the next city and how to get there, 'we are completely lost', 'oh we are actually from XY, but it's soooo annoying there' (enter reasons why it's stupid (waka) and annoying (iwa) ). the others actually help them out and talk about where NOT to go (they treat them like friends after saying their city is stupid) and even say some stuff about a dragon fight and so on (they are not involved in that one themselves. they are only on patrol to make sure no one tries to sneak in. 'other patrols are here and there' they show it on a map, just in case they get lost again). this goes on for a few days with similar groups (they always have either cleaned the maps of any previous marks or use new maps or 'your colleague told me XY but we just cannot seem to find the right way').

one day, after they leave an especially aggressive group they leave a comment about their true reason and leave. when the others processed it and follow them, they are gone.

they are sitting on a tree watching them and joking about them via telepathy ("maybe we should knock them out and wait for the next morning to send the 'alright' sign to the other troups?" "nah. then we might be too late to tell mattsun about the other group's advancement. also, they would just change the signs if they found their companions attacked later. this way we can tell the others about them. just in case. they cannot do anything without their 'weapons'/stuff anyway." "true!" Bo grins wide). then bo grabs Oiks in his arms and jumps, changing during it and carrying a laughing Oiks off in his claws (it’s too dark for the others to see more than a shadow, hear laughing, flapping wings and feel a strong wind that destroys their fires and spreads their stuff into the forest bushes. without a light or their stuff, they have to wait till the next morning to go back to their castle or join their friends which takes at least a day. more than enough time for oiboku to get back and inform their leaders.)

when they do normal runs to check up on the neighbouring country and the borders without finding dangerous information they sometimes actually wait till sunrise to run off or the mid of the day. (when they are out of sight bo stops in midair (hovering) and lets oikawa climb onto his back, which is a bit dangerous without a saddle, and in midair on top, but they don’t have the opportunity to prepare in the forests or towns. Oiks is already used to it and bo is really careful)

boku is thrilled about their success and makes some dangerous stunts to let out some energy (“it was sooooooo annoying to travel for days in human form and not flying once”) with Oiks safely in his grip

the other spy pairs are sugakuro and kentora, but they got different regions. (they change regions and areas often so that they wouldn’t be recognised and exchange information)

when they do get recognized (bo doesn’t remember them at all, but oiks would always) they tell a lie "we got a job there (random place they visited last time) and have to do runs at (another random city)." or when they ask how it went "horrible! we were attacked by bandits, lost all our products and money and had to search for a new job to afford our travel back! I’m sure our boss will be really angry! who knows?! maybe he'll even pretend he doesn’t know us?!" (when they are offered to be escorted or when the others know the person in question) oiks makes sure never to invent some random shop. always makes sure they are real ones and he actually knows them. ("strange. I have been talking with them last time and they didn’t mention new employees" " ... that's bc we aren’t really employees. yet. we'd hoped they would let us work there once we have proven our worth") ... bc of stuff like this it can happen that they are stuck in a town for a month or two and cannot get away until bo loses his patience and stages an accident or gets them fired. Even if Oikawa doesn’t want to stay there anymore, he waits for Bokuto to ruin things bc it’s easier for Oiks to repair Bo’s misdoings than his own. they check in with the others (iwa) regularly through dragon telepathy, but bo can only switch to dragon mode on special occasions and that strains him a lot. ("you know, you could have blown up a lot earlier. I've allowed you to do so." "buuuuut, he was sooooo nice!!!" "yeah, maybe, but now I have to endure your whining!" "buuuut tooruuuuu!!!" "shut up!!" bo slumps down. oiks groans. "fine. I'll buy sth nice once we are back and then we'll have a reeeaaaally long and exhausting ride!" bo's eyes sparkle and Tooru can feel himself getting excited as well.)

Oiks wears his rider mark right over his heart, so when they are working he never shows himself without a shirt (once he was seen and told a story about how he had wanted to become a dragon rider, but then his dragon died on a mission and now he hates all riders, especially his old city, so he never wants to join them again and live a calm life with his childhood friend bo). Bo though can be seen without a shirt often. (much to oiks dismay, but to the town's girls (and boys) happiness. oiks can never decide whether he's happy/proud or dissatisfied/jealous about it)

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Goose Island Bourbon County Stout 2018

Proprietor’s Blend. Chicago Only

GI President Todd Ahsmann is calling this the greatest year of all time for BCS. A record 8 releases are set to drop on Black Friday.

Bourbon County is something that Goose works on all 12 months. In January the internal competition begins amongst brewers and lab technicians. Everyone gets to propose his/her version of BCS in a one-liter jar.

4 rounds and a couple months later, Brewmaster Jared Jankoski decides which finalists get the bottle treatment.

Themes from the Goose Clybourn Preview Event: -RDF (Real Degree of Fermentation) was up this year so ABV is 15.4% ABV up from 14.

-Everything was aged in a blend of 75% Heaven Hill, 25% Buffalo Trace barrels for an average of 10 months. It’s a shift from using all Heaven Hill last year.

– Dorothy is the code name for a collection of six whirlpool stainless steel infusion tanks. These were installed for balanced extraction rates after cold adjuncts are added. This tank re-circulation method replaces adding adjuncts to fermenters and barrels.

-All the flavors in this year’s lineup have made it to trials in the past

8, a Goose Black Friday Record

R &D Manager Mike Siegel sequenced the order of the 2018 tasting. This is was first time Goose staff tried them all. Prop left the bright tank just 2hrs before the event. Bourbon County Brand Coffee Stout is absent this year. It’s a bittersweet reality for the original BCS variant. That beer had been in the core lineup every year since its 2010 debut with an Intelligentsia’s Black Cat Espresso Blend.

1st all new BCS recipe since Barleywine

Bourbon County Wheatwine A very simple, stripped down beer that highlights the character of the barrel aging process. It’s an entirely new recipe, the first new offering in the Bourbon County family since the introduction of Barleywine.

Innovation Brewer, Tim Faith took on the project start to finish from a single barrel trial over 2 years ago. It’s not an unheard of style, but it’s uncommon, for sure.

Back in 2015 Goose Island Clybourn brewers led by Jon Naghski took a silver medal at FOBAB for their Cherry Run Wheatwine. The Fulton interpretation has bright sherry tones and a much less layered complexity when compared to Barleywine.

Wheatwine is a continued exploration of what the Bourbon County can be.

A sweet, expressive barrel showcase with a simple 2 row, malted barley and malted wheat backdrop. The color comes from the extended 2.5hr boil. Fresh viscosity and mouthfeel expose the bourbon barrel for what it is. This extension of the tribe is not related at all to the original Greg Hall stout recipe.

1800 N. Clybourn

Bourbon County Original OG is priority number one for the Goose brewing team and the most important beer of the lineup every year. Not just because of legacy but it’s the base that feeds into most other variants. OG comes out very balanced; historically you expect a little more heat. The fudge and molasses notes are forward this year.

Bourbon County Stout Reserve Fresh 4 yr casks are out. In steps 2017 Whisky of the Year, Elijah Craig’s 12yr casks. Expect distro in Chicago and Kentucky with small quantities headed to NY and GI’s worldwide pubs. An older cask transforms this beer. The level of trust to receive these older casks makes this one special. Expect more toffee, oak, vanilla and dried fruit character than OG. These beers are effortlessly alluring.

Chicago, Kentucky + Goose Worldwide Pubs

Brewmaster Jared Jankoski*

Midnight Orange Oscar Sanchez and Paul Levin both landed on the same concept during trials. This national variant is modeled after delicious milk chocolate candies that reveal individual chocolate segments filled with real orange oil when unwrapped.

Actual broken up chocolate bars and cacao nibs are a labor intensive and costly project to bring into the brewhouse, but Goose has a history of this behavior. This is more about the orange zest than the juice. Minimizing the bitterness that comes from the pith was a goal.

Midnight Orange is accentuated with a round milk chocolate candy profile. Oscar was inspired by dark chocolate orange mocha down in Mexico. Spanish Navelina orange peels had a depth of character that the staff really dug. 2 eastern African cacao nib variants were sourced. The subtle citrus bump makes the stout lighter on the palate.

Whiskey cocktails (Old Fashioned), orange infused beers (Fulton & Wood En Passant) have set the precedent. It’s an odd harmony that was bound to happen. Conversations with Heaven Hill Master Distiller, Denny Potter about appreciating citrus flavors resident already in his single barrel reserve bourbons pushed momentum forward.

Refining orange as a character takes this variant into a slightly different direction than we are used to. The volatile sweet orange peels were maintained with a high quality freeze. Brewers had 2 days after shipment to incorporate.

Spanish Navelina Orange Peels + Eastern African Cacao Nibs*

Bourbon County Coffee Barleywine This happy accident was born at FOBAB 2013 when the big homie, Ryan Tucker connected Barleywine to a coffee randall instead of Coffee BCS.

Layered caramel malt flavors with hints of raisin and maple. It’s a thick, massive graceful barleywine. There are 7 Central American coffee growing regions. Over 1400 meters is the altitude where premium coffees are grown. The team flew to southwest Guatemala to visit Finca La Soledad, a coffee farm that’s been part of the Perez family for 6 generations. One of GI’s 37 brewers was a roaster for 18 years at Intelligentsia.

After cupping 16 coffees, high altitude, classic bourbon was a top 3 for everyone in attendance.

In the past ground up cold brew concentrate was added to the beer. This year beans were added to the infusion tank where it swirled and recirculated through whole roasted beans with no grinding and no delusion.

The controlled environment of the Dorothy allows for a balanced flavor extraction from additional ingredients. Barleywine is a mindful partner for coffee because there’s less roasted malt than stout. This was the most scrutinized of the variants with tastings every hour and overly assessed raw materials.

This isn’t the end of Coffee Stout, it’s just a pivot.*

Bourbon County Proprietor’s Blend (Chicago Only) 12 lbs per barrel of ground dark chocolate bars and two types cacao nibs were added to Prop ‘18. An earthy dark and a milky chocolate, the same ones used in Midnight Orange.

There are no rules in this blend. Introducing new recipes is a huge part of the annual BCS process. The challenge of these beers was to highlight 1 or 2 ingredients in each release. Goose has used cacao nibs for years but never chocolate. The robust depths of raw cacao nibs compliment the milky chocolate.

Mike Siegel insisted on using the actual brittle roasted bean instead of liquid chocolate. Prop was sampled every 30 minutes for a month until it yielded desired flavors. It circulates in tanks during the day and rests overnights. It’s the first time in 15 years that the brewery worked non-stop third shifts on a beer.

2010, 2014, 2018

Bourbon County Vanilla The trucking company didn’t want to insure the vanilla pallets this year because they were too expensive. In the past staff looked at vanilla variety instead of the compounds in the character. This is the latest heavily nuanced expression of vanilla in the lineup following 2010 and 2014 (Vanilla Rye)

After 2 days, classic vanilla and toasted marshmallow begin to rise in the profile. The longer it sits, fruity floral, then deep leathery notes emerge. A hammer mill (food grade wood chipper) gently shredded whole Madagascar vanilla beans just enough to expose the inside beauty of the seeds without pulverizing it.

Prop wasn’t packaged yet, it arrived straight from the bright tank for this sneak peek*

Bramble Rye’s 1st appearance in the lineup since 2011*

Bramble Rye When Brewmaster Jared Jankoski shares his BCS spider graph of nuance, this one sits at the bolder end of the spectrum. Bramble was a brewers and fan favorite back in 2011. It’s easy to fuck up a fruited stout with overly pronounced fruit characteristics…not the case here.

The worlds of rye whiskey and fruit have never layered better. Jammy tannins from raspberry and blackberry seeds and skins are wrapped nicely with a distinct velvety mouthfeel. Rye whisky highlights earth tones. Raspberry puree, whole blackberry and blackberry juice create an opulent, rich intense fruit wave that transcends all.

After a sip Jared’s impression was simply, “It taste like it belongs in the chalice of a 10th Century king.”

–Nkosi

Est. 1988

Other Notes: -There are 37 brewers at Fulton now. Triple the number they had just 7 years ago.

– Tim Faith initially brewed Wheatwine on a 2 barrel pilot system and aged it for a year ago so the crew could have a proof of concept long before its release.

-All 8 variants will flow at Prop Day on November 11th

-* denotes photo courtesy of Brad Chmielewski

-A Bramble Rye Sorbet and a Proprietor’s 2018 Float (chocolate gelato, chocolate whipped cream, chocolate sauce) were served at the event.

-Raw ingredients (African cacao nibs, Spanish orange peel, Guatemalan coffee, raspberry + blackberry) all made appearances to accent this year’s varietals

Source: https://www.chicagobeergeeks.com/2018/10/goose-island-bourbon-county-stout-2018/

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