#BUT THEN IT HIT ME. and i got so emotional i made this in like 30 minutes flat......

[jobean12-blog]

You come home and see that babe got you a present. What's in the box?

The Perfect Gift

Pairing: Joel Miller x female reader

Word Count: 700 (exactly hehe)

Summary: Living in Jackson has given you as close to a normal life as you can get in the post apocalyptic world and Joel just makes it that much better.

Author's Note: Thank you my sweet Cia for sending such lovely thoughts my way! I was doing some yoga this morning and this idea hit me. I appreciate you always thinking of me! I hope you're having the best week and happiest holidays! HUGS and LOVE! ❤️Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the lovely @firefly-graphics thank you Daisy🥰

Warnings: Soft and sweet fluff

Pedro Pascal Character Masterlist

The world outside is muffled in a hush, every sound softened by the blanket of sparkling, cold snow. But inside, there’s only warmth.

A strong arm rests against the curve of your waist and calloused fingertips trace idle shapes on your soft skin. The steady rhythm of his breath is warm along your neck before his lips press delicate kisses down to your bare shoulder.

“Mornin’ darlin’,” he whispers, his voice still deep and rumbly with sleep.

You turn over, burying your face in his chest and mumbling, “good morning.”

He pulls you closer and kisses the top of your head.

“Ready to get up?” he chuckles.

“Is it still snowing?” you ask, keeping your face hidden.

He stirs slightly and after a short pause, quietly answers with a “yes.”

“Let’s stay in bed.”

“What about your present?” he murmurs.

At the mention of a gift, you blink open your eyes and reluctantly drag yourself from his warmth to meet his gaze.

“Gift?”

He nods with a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips. You run your fingers through his mussed hair, twirling a stray curl around your fingers before softly kissing him.

“Ok. I can get up for that.”

“I thought so,” he grins with a wink.

He starts to move but you cling to his biceps. “But I don’t want you to leave,” you pout.

“I don’t have to go far,” he says and sits up to reach into the small makeshift nightstand next to the bed.

He pulls out a package, wrapped simply in brown paper with some twine holding it together. He suddenly looks nervous, his expression wide eyed with worry and your eyebrows draw in.

“Joel?”

Without blinking he stares at you and sets it in your lap.

You give him one last curious glance and pull at the string. The paper opens and out falls one of his flannels, your favorite one.

Your face lights up in a smile and you hug it to your chest, letting the sheet fall from your shoulders, revealing more of your naked skin.

He reaches out to touch you. “Do you like it? I know it’s nothing new, but I know how much you love wearing them. Now this one is officially yours.”

Pressing the soft fabric to your chest you bring the collar to your nose with a deep inhale.

Sighing softly, you whisper, “it’s perfect Joel. I love it!”  

You throw yourself into his arms and he helps you put it on, slowly and carefully closing each button but not without brushing his knuckles along your skin, sending a shiver of goosebumps down your spine.

“There,” he says, looking you over. “My perfectly wrapped present.”

You giggle and run your hands down the front. As you do you feel something hard in the front pocket. You stop and look up to find Joel smiling softly.

“Find something else?”

When you reach into the pocket your fingers close around something small and cool and then you pull out your hand in your palm rests a simple gold band.

Your eyes widen and you suck in a gasp.

He takes it from your hand and grabs your chin between his fingers, tilting your face up to his.

“Darlin’,” he starts, his voice gruff with emotion. “I was so lost before. But now that I have you, I need you. Not in the ways to survive, but in the ways that make life worth living. I was made and meant to look for you and wait for you and become yours forever…that is, if you’ll have me. Will you marry me?”

The tears fall freely down your cheeks, and you manage a “yes,” just before your arms wind around his neck and you pepper him with kisses. He takes the ring and with a gentleness that makes your breath catch he slips it onto your left ring finger.

“I love you.”

Your words are a whisper, and he takes your hand in his, lifting it to his lips to kiss across your knuckles, then your palm and finally your wrist before your hand opens to cradle his cheek.

“I love you more,” he answers, closing his eyes.

[sturniqloo]

° NOTHING ELSE °

pairing: Chris Sturniolo & fem!reader

in which: after a long day at work all you want is to be close to your boyfriend. ♡

~warning: nothing,its all fluff,nicknames,English is not my first language! ~

Wednesdays. How you hated them.

You're currently sitting in your office,having tons of paper to sort out and put into system for company you worked for,the sound of rain hitting the windows,keyboard of your computer clicking as your fingers almost finished all the work,only other sound was little hums you left throughout the time...the sighs,the deep breaths,the melodies that were in your mind.

It was enough of a bad day for you,your period,the stupid rain,the coworkers being annoying..just everything was irritating you,and the tons of work didn't help much.

Only thing that helped your mind ease was Chris..knowing he was at home,waiting for you,made you feel warm and relaxed. He was everything you needed. Nothing else.

As you glanced at the clock on the wall,it was near 01:30pm.

'Just an hour and a half more untill being home.'

You thought to yourself .

Your head pounding and the sudden sound of growling in your stomach breaking the silence. You haven't eaten anything yet,but lunch at home won't be soon enough and at this moment the only thing you wanted was to just lay down,sleep and eat. With a big exhale,you moved the chair and leaned back,rubbing your eyes in exhaustion as your gaze fall to the phone on the desk. Thinking about calling Chris sounded like the best thing possible right now. Without hesitation you picked it up,your finger hovering over his contact before calling him. As soon as he answered you can hear his voice.

'hey ma',what's up?'

'hey baby..nothing..-im just exhausted and bored..wanna be home right now'

Your voice tired and soft over the phone. It was clear you needed rest.

After a long call with Chris,time passed,it was now 2:15pm.

'Ugh,just a little more..'

You said to yourself with a big sigh,wishing the time can just pass as soon as possible.

Fastly enough it was time. The clock hit 3pm. Signaling it was time to go home.

You got in the car and drove to your and Chris's house,opening the doors,the warm cozy atmosphere hitting you immediately,the smell of a welcoming home.Taking your shoes off,and putting your coat away you see Chris waiting for you on a couch,your gaze falling to the table in front of him,with bouquet of flowers and ordered food. You could feel your face grinning into a smile,as he stood up towards you.

'hey baby,m'so glad you're back..finally.'

With a kiss on a forehead he pulled you down on the couch to lay with him.

'how was work darling? anything happened?'

He asked while running his hands through your hair softly.

'no,just ton of works,it was very exhausting today...'

You answered while relaxing into his touch,the headache already feeling better.

'well..we can do something if you want,like go out for a walk or little drive..whatever you feel like doing,im down'

His voice was soft and sincere,always knowing what to say or do to make you feel instantly better.

'mhmm..we can stay home tonight,exactly how we are right now,i don't wanna move,just wanna be like this-close to you..it's all i need at the moment'

Chris instantly got that and just relaxed with you,cuddling you even more and just doing everything he could to be there for you.

'i love you,you know that right?'

His voice suddenly breaks the comfortable silence.The words full of truth and emotions.

'yes baby,i love you too'

The only sound right now was your giggle,you always enjoyed times like this with him.You could do it forever,it was all you needed.

Just Chris,and nothing else. ♡

author's note: sorry if this is not good,or long,but Im trynna get back into writting,i hope you liked it,lmk what yall think and ofc I always take requests! ♡tell me if you wanna be added to my taglist! also wanna thank to @strnilolover my Gabby for giving me an idea,love her so much ♡

° Lili's corner °

no pressure tags: @chrislilcumslvt @chrislilcumslvt @mattscoquette @adoreechxmpion @strnilolover @mattslolita @sturn10log1rl @luvleyangeldust

[deans-queen]

𝐈 𝐆𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐌𝐲 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭

Pairing: Dean x Reader (Y/N)

Summary: it’s Christmas Eve and Reader (Y/N) is thinking about her past relationship with Dean.

Warnings: sadness, emotional topics, smut (just a bit of make up sex), angst. (Let me know if I miss any)

Pre-AN: this story is based on the song “Last Christmas” by Wham!

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫’𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕

The snowflakes clung to the windshield as I sat in the driver’s seat of my car, parked outside my family’s house. I hadn’t meant to get here this early, but the thought of walking in and seeing all the Christmas cheer—the garlands, the twinkling lights, the tree laden with ornaments—made me hesitate. Last Christmas had been so perfect, and this year, I wasn’t sure I could face it.

I leaned my forehead against the steering wheel, letting the memories rush back.

𝑳𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒎𝒂𝒔

𝑰 𝒈𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕

𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒏𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝒅𝒂𝒚, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒈𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚

It had been magical. Dean had shown up unannounced, his leather jacket dusted with snow, a mischievous grin on his face as he held up a box wrapped in red and gold paper. I’d never forget how he looked that night—the way the firelight danced in his green eyes, the way he kissed me under the mistletoe with a hunger that made me forget anyone else was in the room.

And then, a week later, he was gone. No calls, no texts. Just a voicemail: “Y/N, I gotta take care of some stuff. Don’t wait for me.” That was it. He was good at that—disappearing when things got too real.

𝑻𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒓, 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒕𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒔

𝑰’𝒍𝒍 𝒈𝒊𝒗𝒆 𝒊𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍

I spent the entire evening with my family trying not to think about Dean. Later on when I got home, I sighed deeply, turning off the car and bracing myself against the cold. But as I stepped out, I froze. There he was, leaning against the Impala parked across the street, hands shoved in his pockets, looking like a goddamn dream wrapped in flannel and regret.

“Y/N,” he said, his voice low and rough, like gravel on velvet.

I wanted to scream at him. Or maybe throw myself into his arms. Instead, I folded my arms across my chest, keeping my distance. “What are you doing here, Dean?”

“I… I wanted to see you,” he said, taking a cautious step closer. “I know I screwed up. Big time. But I—”

“Don’t.” My voice cracked despite my best efforts. “You don’t get to show up here after what you did. After you left.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know. I didn’t deserve you then, and I sure as hell don’t deserve you now. But I couldn’t stay away. Not tonight.”

“Why? Because you’re lonely?” My words came out harsher than I intended, but I was tired of his games. “Because you remembered how good it was last Christmas?”

Dean flinched, but he didn’t back down. “Yeah, I remembered. Every damn detail. The way you laughed when I tried to bake cookies and almost set the kitchen on fire. The way you looked at me when I gave you that necklace. The way you—” He stopped himself, his jaw tightening. “I remember it all, Y/N. And I’ve been kicking myself every day since I walked away.”

My heart ached, but I couldn’t let him off that easy. “You didn’t just walk away…. You broke me! I gave you my heart Dean!”

His eyes softened, and in two long strides, he was standing in front of me. “I know, sweetheart. And I’ve been broken without you. I’ve been trying to fix myself so I could be the guy you deserve. But damn it, Y/N, I need you. I love you.”

The words hit me like a punch to the chest. I tried to stay strong, but when he cupped my face in his hands, I crumbled.

“Say the word, and I’ll leave,” he whispered, his breath warm against my skin. “But if there’s even a chance you still feel something for me…”

I didn’t let him finish. I grabbed the front of his jacket and pulled him down into a kiss that was all fire and desperation. His arms wrapped around me, holding me like he never wanted to let go.

“God, I missed you,” he murmured against my lips, his hands sliding down to grip my waist. “You’re all I think about, sweetheart. You, and the way you taste, the way you feel…”

I gasped as he backed me against the Jeep, his mouth trailing down my neck, leaving a trail of heat in its wake. “Dean,” I whispered, my fingers tangling in his hair.

“I’m not going anywhere this time,” he said, his voice dark and rough. “You hear me? You’re mine, Y/N. I’ll spend every Christmas and every single damn day proving it if I have to.”

I pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes. “You better mean that, Winchester.”

He smirked, that cocky, irresistible smirk that always got me. “Oh, I mean it, sweetheart. And I’ll spend the rest of the night showing you just how much.”

I wasn’t sure if it was the snow falling around us, the whiskey lingering on Dean’s breath, or the ache of all the time we’d lost, but the second his lips crashed into mine again, the world blurred. The anger, the heartbreak—it all burned away under the heat of his touch.

“Get inside,” Dean growled, his voice low and rough as his hands slid down my hips. “Unless you want your neighbors to get a free show.”

I didn’t trust my voice, so I just grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the door. The second it clicked shut behind us, he had me pressed against it, his hands framing my face like he was trying to memorize every detail.

“You’re so damn beautiful,” he murmured, his lips brushing mine before trailing down my jaw. “I missed you so much, Y/N. I’ve been dreaming about this. About you.”

Before I could respond, he scooped me up like I weighed nothing, carrying me through the house until he found the living room. The Christmas tree cast a soft, golden glow over the room, and for a split second, I remembered last year—how we’d curled up on this very couch, trading kisses and pretending the rest of the world didn’t exist.

Dean didn’t stop until he laid me down on the couch, hovering over me like a man possessed. His hands were everywhere—skimming up my thighs, pushing up the hem of my sweater, leaving goosebumps in their wake. His lips followed, tracing a path down my neck, his teeth grazing my skin just enough to make me gasp.

“Tell me what you want,” he murmured, his voice dark and commanding as his hands gripped my waist. “Tell me how to make it right, Y/N.”

I arched beneath him, my body already on fire. “I want you, Dean. All of you.”

His eyes darkened, and he wasted no time. In seconds, my sweater was gone, and his lips were on my bare skin, worshipping every inch of me. His hands worked quickly, tugging off my jeans and underwear with a single, fluid motion that made my heart race.

“Goddamn,” he muttered, his eyes raking over me. “You’re perfect.”

I reached for him, pulling him down into another kiss, desperate to feel him closer. His jacket hit the floor, followed by his flannel and T-shirt, revealing the solid planes of his chest, the scar that trailed over his ribs, and the tattoo I knew by heart. My hands roamed over him, memorizing every inch like it was the first time.

“You still with me?” he asked, his voice softening as he pressed his forehead to mine. “I don’t want to hurt you, sweetheart. I want this to be—”

“Dean,” I interrupted, my voice steady despite the trembling in my limbs. “Shut up and kiss me.”

That was all it took. He slid his hands under my thighs, pulling me flush against him as he kissed me like his life depended on it. His hips rocked against mine, and I felt the hard evidence of just how much he wanted me.

“You’re so goddamn stubborn,” he growled against my ear, his voice thick with need. “But you’re mine, Y/N. Every inch of you. And I’m going to prove it.”

“Then do it,” I challenged, my nails digging into his shoulders. “Show me.”

Dean didn’t need any more encouragement. His hands gripped my thighs as he sank into me, slow and deliberate, his eyes locked on mine. The stretch, the burn, the way he filled me—it was overwhelming in the best way. He started moving, his pace unhurried but firm, like he was savoring every second.

“You feel so good,” he groaned, his head dropping to my shoulder as his hips rolled against mine. “Better than I remembered. Better than I deserve.”

“Dean,” I gasped, my fingers tangling in his hair. “Faster.”

He obeyed, his movements growing rougher, more desperate. The couch creaked beneath us, but neither of us cared. The only sounds were our labored breaths, the soft whimpers that escaped my lips, and the deep, guttural moans that rumbled from his chest.

“Say it,” he demanded, his voice raw as he buried his face in my neck. “Say you’re mine, babygirl”

“I’m yours,” I whispered, and the words felt like a promise. “Always.”

That was all it took to push us both over the edge. His name fell from my lips like a prayer as the pleasure consumed me, and I felt him shudder against me, his grip on my hips tightening as he followed me into oblivion.

For a long moment, neither of us moved. His weight was warm and solid against me, his breath hot on my skin as he pressed lazy kisses to my shoulder.

“I meant what I said,” he murmured after a while, his voice soft but firm. “I’m not leaving again, Y/N. Not unless you make me.”

I cupped his face, brushing a thumb over his stubbled jaw. “You better not. Because I’m not letting you go this time.”

He grinned, leaning down to capture my lips in another kiss. “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”

And for the first time in a year, it really was.

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞🤍

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone!! I hope you enjoy the time with your families and loved ones 🥰

Last Christmas has always been one of my favorite Christmas songs so of course I’m gonna write a story about it! Feel free to let me know what you think! I always love reading feedback!

Like & follow for more !! Xoxo

Want to read more? Check out my other stories!

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𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

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If you would like to be added on my Taglist for stories please send me a message or comment on this post

[n0vazsq]

Amor | Marc Bernal x Reader

pairing . . . marc bernal x gf!reader

summary . . . Marc surprises you with a tattoo of your initials for your two year anniversary

request . . . yes!! based on this request!

word count . . . 1.1k+

warnings . . . none!

faceclaim . . . N/A

alexavia yaps . . . ok thats it i need marc in my life right now right here

taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 ,, @ilovebarcaaa ,, @notm4d1 ,, @httpsdana ,, @paucubarsisimp (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)

. . . It was a typical day; quiet, simple, and peaceful, until Marc had a little surprise up his sleeve. Literally.

You had no idea what he was planning for your two year anniversary, but when he picked you up in his car that afternoon, there was something about the way he was acting that made you suspicious.

He was unusually quiet, glancing at you with that soft, knowing smile of his, like he was holding onto a secret.

You couldn’t figure out what was going on, but you’d learned that when Marc had something up his sleeve, it was always worth the wait.

"Where are we going?" you asked, raising an eyebrow as you pulled your seatbelt tight.

Marc just smirked, one hand briefly brushing against yours as he drove. "Patience, amor. You’ll see soon enough."

Your curiosity only grew the closer you got to the destination. You’d been to the area before, but never to this particular street, which had several small shops.

Marc turned into a parking lot, then quickly hopped out of the car, running around to open the door for you.

You glanced up at him, confused. "Marc, what’s going on?"

"Just trust me," he said, his smile only growing wider. "It’s a surprise. And I promise you’re going to love it."

With that, he led you inside a small tattoo studio that you hadn’t noticed before, its dark, cozy interior decorated with sketches and pictures of tattoos.

The air smelled like ink and something comforting, and you felt a small flutter of nerves in your stomach.

"Marc?" you questioned, looking up at him with confusion. "What’s happening?"

Marc laughed, a troublesome glint in his eyes as he walked over to the front desk. "You’ll see. Just relax, okay?"

Your heart skipped a beat as the realization hit you. "You’re getting a tattoo?"

His grin was all teeth as he shrugged, but then his expression softened, and he took your hand in his, leading you toward a seat near the back.

"I’m getting something for you, amor," he said quietly, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your wrist.

You blinked, completely surprised. "For me? What do you mean?"

Marc’s eyes sparkled with affection. "For our two year anniversary," he murmured, kneeling down beside you as he motioned for you to sit.

He pulled a small piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to you, revealing a design that took your breath away.

It was simple yet deeply meaningful; a small, elegant tattoo of your initials in Marc's handwriting that seemed to be written with so much love. There, at the bottom, were two small hearts.

Your heart skipped when you realized what it was.

"This is… for me?" you whispered, your fingers grazing over the design in awe.

Marc nodded, his gaze intense as he looked at you with soft, almost nervous eyes. "Yeah. I wanted to do something meaningful. Something that showed how much you mean to me."

You were speechless for a moment, the enormity of his gesture washing over you. "Marc… I don’t even know what to say."

He laughed softly, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. "You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted you to know, in my own way, how much I love you. And how much these two years have meant to me."

Before you could speak, a tattoo artist walked over, greeting Marc with a warm smile. He briefly explained what was going to happen, setting up the equipment.

Marc glanced back at you one last time before taking a seat on the chair, rolling up his sleeve and getting ready for the tattoo to begin.

You watched him carefully, your emotions swirling. There was a nervousness in his eyes, but also a quiet confidence that he was doing something important.

For you. And for the love you two shared. He reached out, taking your hand in his with a gentle squeeze as the needle buzzed to life.

"It’s okay, amor," Marc murmured, his voice steady as you sat beside him. "You’re here with me, right?"

"Of course," you whispered, your heart swelling with affection for him.

As the tattoo began to take shape on his skin, you stayed close, sitting beside him, never once letting go of his hand.

The room was filled with the sound of the needle as the artist worked, but it was Marc’s soft, steady breathing and the way he kept glancing over at you with that same loving gaze that made your heart race.

Once it was done, Marc stood up, revealing the tattoo that now sat proudly on his skin. The sight of your initials, forever etched into his arm, made you feel a rush of emotions.

Love, admiration, gratitude.

Marc smiled down at you, his expression vulnerable and soft. "I wanted to carry you with me always," he said, his voice gentle. "To remind me of the best two years of my life."

Tears stung your eyes, and you could hardly hold back the overwhelming emotions that bubbled up. "Marc… this is… this is the most incredible thing anyone’s ever done for me."

He leaned down to press a soft kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering there. "I’m glad you love it, mi cielo. I’ll carry you with me, always."

You pulled him into a tight embrace, your heart full to bursting with love and gratitude. "I love you so much, Marc. I really do."

"And I love you more than anything," he whispered, holding you close as you both stood there for a moment, wrapped in each other’s arms.

He kissed the top of your head gently before pulling back just enough to look at you. "Happy anniversary, mi amor. Here’s to many more years of love, memories, and tattoos that remind us of how much we mean to each other."

You couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across your face as you looked at him, at the tattoo that symbolized the two of you, your love, your bond, your forever.

"Happy anniversary, Marc," you said, your voice thick with emotion as you kissed him softly on the lips. "I’ll love you for all of time."

And in that moment, with your initials on his arm and your heart completely and utterly his, you knew you were both ready to spend the rest of your lives together.

[rocknrolldecadence]

Hiii, okay so, i've read some of your fics and i really like how you write things, so i wanted to request something fluffy with Axl. Like the reader is really stressed and worn out, so Axl is there for her and in general very sweet with her? I just want you to include lots of hand holding, hugs and kisses (maybe a massage too if you can throw it in somewhere). You don't have to do it if you don't want to, thank you in advance!

˖⁺‧₊˚ ˚₊‧⁺˖✮-------------------✮˖⁺‧₊˚ ˚₊‧⁺˖

i’ve got you

you’re stressed, and axl knows what to do to cheer you up

warnings: alcohol and drunkenness

a/n: tysm!!! sorry this took so long, i hope you like it 😛

life had been hitting you hard recently. real hard. it seemed like no matter what you did, you couldn’t ease the stress you felt. everyday was a struggle, and oftentimes you wondered if you’d even get through a day. with everything going on in your life, it felt like you’d never get relief.

there was one thing you found solace in, though. well… one person. your boyfriend, axl. you’d think since he’s the lead singer of the band many proclaimed to be ‘the next big thing’ in the world of rock n roll, he wouldn’t be very loving or attentive. but he was the complete opposite. axl was the most kind, considerate man you knew. sure, that certainly wasn’t the image he kept up in his music or for the media, but he truly was the best person you knew. so when you went round to his place one day, he could tell something was up.

“what’s wrong, love?” he asked you as you sat down together on his sofa. it was old, and a spring loudly creaked as you sat, but you didn’t mind. there was already a glass of wine waiting for you, the decanter placed like a centrepiece between your glass and axl’s. you sighed and sipped on your drink, hesitant to answer. you felt the liquid run down your throat, warming you up from the inside out. silently, you wondered how he was able to afford it. it seemed very fancy. you met your boyfriend’s eyes and began to speak, but cut yourself off.

“you can tell me.” he encouraged, his soft tone of voice putting you at ease.

“just… life, i guess? its so tough. i feel like there’s so many things just weighing me down every day. no matter what i do, i feel so stressed. it’s like there’s no remedy for it. i don’t know what to do.” you confessed. you knew you were safe to tell axl anything. that was what you liked about him - he always made you feel valued and not like you were crazy.

axl listened intently as you vented to him. when you were done, he grabbed you softly and pulled you into a hug, pressing a light kiss on your cheek. the combined smell of tobacco and wine putting you at ease. you let yourself sink into him, and slowly but surely, you began to cry. tears dripped down your face and were absorbed into axl’s shirt. he held you tighter, letting you get your emotions out.

“i’ve got you. don’t worry.” he reassured you as you cried. you stayed like that for a while with him, just holding onto eachother wordlessly. it felt like the world had stopped. you didn’t know how long you ended up sitting on that dingy sofa together, but it was insanely comforting. soon you started to feel better. but then axl had an idea.

“how about we go get some drinks?”

“oh, axl, i don’t kno-”

“think about it. we’ll walk down, sit and have a few, and then we can come back here and sleep. does that not sound good to you?” he said to you. you tossed the idea around in your head before eventually agreeing. why not? it’d be fun.

you got yourself ready with the few supplies you always left at axl’s place. once you were ready, you left with him and started to walk to the nearest bar to his place. subtly, he linked your hand with his, intertwining your fingers together. it made you blush. you and axl had been together for a long time now, but whenever he did small things like that, it still had you reacting like you did at the start of your relationship.

it was a short enough walk to the bar. you sat down on a stool beside axl. it wasn’t very busy, so you got served right away. the bartender took your orders and you both got them quickly. as you sipped away at your drink, you and your boyfriend quietly chatted. after a while he asked, “how you feeling now?”

“i’m okay,” you answered, “feeling better than before, anyway.”

“i’m glad. i hate seeing you so upset, darling.”

you smiled and the two of you fell back into what you were talking about before. as the hours passed, the bar filled up more and more, until you could barely hear what axl was saying to you. so, when you finished your drinks, you paid and left. your tipsiness had you stumbling slightly as you walked back. axl reached out his arm and you leant on him. you giggled at the close contact. he was warm. comforting. and you wanted to tell him so.

“hey, axl.” you said suddenly, stopping under a street lamp.

he turned to look at you and stopped too. “yeah?”

“thanks for tonight. you always know what to do to make me feel better. love you.”

he smiled. “i love you too, baby.”

and with that, he grabbed you and kissed you, disregarding the cars that sped past on the road beside you. you kissed him back, leaning into his embrace.

[fairyniceyeah]

You made my dawn - Big brother 🍒🦖

Titel from 1 to 13 (SEVENTEEN)

Previous story: Food coma

Summary: They didn’t need her anymore.

CW: /

Main characters: S.Coups/Seungcheol + Dino/Chan

Eunji hadn’t thought that one simple sentence could cause so many diverse emotions.

“I don’t need your help today, noona. Cheollie-hyung helped me with my homework already!”

Chan had been positively beaming at her when he told her, proudly showing his finished worksheets with some notes unmistakingly in Seungcheol’s writing.

Of course Eunji hadn’t really enjoyed doing homework of all things with the trainees - another thing she had not expected she would do when she became a manager - but it sort of had become a ritual for her and Chan to sit down every evening they could and look over his schoolwork. She had patiently answered questions and at points spent her breaks - or schedules she had accompanied the trainees to but wasn’t really needed at - to research some answers on the internet. 

It had been even more work on top of her workload so she found herself surprised that the first emotion she felt was sadness. She had liked those evenings. With being responsible for so many kids it was sometimes hard to keep track of them all and she had enjoyed doing it with him, spending one on one time with the maknae.

Of course she didn’t show it. She just ruffled his hair and told him she was glad he had found help in his responsible mat-hyung. 

But when the scene repeated each evening, she couldn’t help but feel nostalgia. Together Seungcheol and Chan sat down at the kitchen table, pouring over the latter’s homework. They would work diligently most of the time but there were so many moments of laughter too. Whenever Chan had a question Seungcheol would do his best to answer it, finding creative ways to explain concepts Chan didn’t quite grasp. 

“Remember when we cooked for Chuseok? When Jun and Mingyu helped each other out with cutting the vegetables - that’s a symbiotic relationship. They profited from each other’s strengths, Junnie is better with the carrots and Mingyu-yah did all of the kimchi when Jun started to struggle. Jeonghannie, on the other hand, made me cut all the onions until I was crying while he sat and snacked on what we had already prepared - that’s a parasitic relationship. He used me for his gain but I didn’t gain anything from working with that idiot.”

Chan would always end up hugging Seungcheol after each session, eyes sparkling and thanking his hyung profusely. It was cute really, the way he even clung to Seungcheol when he explained something, the older one rubbing Chan’s back while he talked. 

And then, maybe a week after Chan had first rejected her help, she was hit with a new realization. Chan was sitting curled up on Seungcheol’s lap while they did some math homework, the maknae drained and exhausted and Seungcheol doing more of the work than just helping. 

The painful sensation in her chest was jealousy.  

She wanted to be the one helping Chan, spend time with the maknae. But Seungcheol, the natural older brother, had taken over that role for her. Years ago that hadn’t been thinkable - Seungcheol was not a fan of any extra work but seeing Chan struggle with it must have triggered something in him. 

So when Chan needed him, no matter how little he matter was, he was there.

And then she remembered all those little things. All the little ways the trainees had grown to become one team, one family. 

How the trainees noticed when Seungcheol got nervous and overwhelmed with his newly announced role of leader, all of them rallying together to remind him that they loved and trusted him, that he was the right person.

How whenever Jeonghan struggled with his long hair, one of the members already had a hair tie ready and helped him get it out of his face - emphasizing that the long hair the company insisted he keep did not make him look like he was a woman.

How they all instinctively knew when Jisoo was homesick and needed a hug, the same going for Jun.

How they all went to Soonyoung if they needed help with choreography and always praised what he created, knowing he sometimes doubted himself.

How they knew to give Wonwoo space, sometimes even before Wonwoo himself realised he was getting overwhelmed and would take him to a quiet corner so he could recharge some energy.

How none of them teased Jihoon for his height but rather helped him and even anticipated when he needed help reaching something and giving it to him before he even had to ask for help.

How they all patiently waited for Minghao to speak, never rushing him or talking over him, just gently encouraging his Korean and praising him for his massively improving skills.

How Seokmin’s favorite playlist would ring through the whole dorm if he was upset, the other trainees turning it on so he would smile again and sing along enthusiastically.

How they always checked in with Mingyu when they teased him if it was okay and if they went too far, and how they would sometimes even reach for him before he could predictably spill something or trip.

How they knew that Seungkwan thrived on physical contact and they would make sure to hug and kiss him whenever they could.

How they never teased Hansol for his quirks, just made sure the second youngest felt heard and doting on him when they could.

How apparently they were now even helping Chan with unpleasant tasks like homework. 

Once upon a time, all of that had been Eunji’s job, something she was proud of and loved to do for her charges. She had been the one they went to with problems. The one they trusted more than anyone. 

But now watching Seungcheol just sweeping in and taking over her role, guiding the kids like she had done … she couldn’t help but feel obsolete and superfluous. 

They didn’t need her anymore.

Eunji was torn out of her thoughts by a loud gasp and then a worried voice calling: “Noona? Are you … are you crying?”

The manager looked up from her position on the sofa to where Seungcheol and Chan looked at her, both with equally confused and worried expressions on their faces. She reached up and indeed, her face was wet with tears. She hadn’t even noticed she had started to cry.

She hadn’t expected what happened next. Seungcheol and Chan abandoned the homework on the table and rushed over to her. Chan threw himself onto her lap, wrapping her in his arms while Seungcheol knelt down by the couch, taking one of her hands in his bigger ones. Eunji could have sworn they had been so much smaller.

“I’m fine, don’t worry. Noona’s fine”, she said, her trembling voice betraying her. “I’m just being silly.”

Chan looked at her, eyes wide and honest. “Noona, you’re never silly.”

“What’s going on?”, Seungcheol asked gently, squeezing her hand. “We wanna help you for once too. You do so much for us. Let us be there for you too.”

Eunji sniffed, a shaky laugh escaping her. It was so Seungcheol.

“It’s just … I guess, watching you work together on Channie’s homework like that, it made me realize how far you have come. Where are the little trainees I just started working with, the ones who wanted bedtime stories and hugs and held my hand all the time? You’ve all grown up so much and you’ve grown so close, like a real family. You are exactly what I hoped for you to be: The best of friends and a great team. Just … I guess, with how much you have grown… you don’t really need your old noona anymore, do you? You’ve got each other now.”

As she finished speaking Chan leaned forwards, wrapping her in the tightest hug ever. “We’ll always need you, noona”, he sniffed, “don’t say that. We need you. You’ve always been there for you. Without you we wouldn’t be here like this. You make sure we feel seen and are happy and … noona, I think I’ll need you even when I’m eighty.”

Eunji couldn’t help the small sob escaping her and she pressed a kiss to the maknae’s hair. “You are too sweet, Channie.”

“He’s right though, noona”, Seungcheol agreed, sitting on the couch and wrapping his arms around both of them. “You were there when we started. You made us who we are today. Without you there would be no SEVENTEEN. You made our dawn.”

Next story: Hug

[niamh-oshea]

No amount of books, videos or advice could've prepared me for how painful active labour truly was. Let alone childbirth.

So, when I told Isaac that I wanted to give birth without any more morphine, let alone a drop of the highly tempting epidural, I could understand his apprehension. But I wanted my body to do what it was made to do. What I had been preparing for it to do.

My pregnancy had not always been smooth sailing. During my first trimester, my morning sickness was round the clock. And my second trimester didn't leave me glowing. Instead, every day was a battle with my raging hormones and how they strongly affected my mood and emotions. And although all the physical sickness eventually settled by the time my third trimester rolled around, a childhood bully had decided to make yet another unwelcome appearance once again, tormenting me like he had done many times before. Except this time was his worst yet.

Somehow, he had gotten access of my computer, and of my hard drive. Finding where I keep mine and Isaac's most intimate sexctapes, he threatened to distribute it to shame me. The mental and emotional toll it took on me had its physical consequences, urging my OBGYN to put me on strict bed rest. Meanwhile, enraged, Isaac took charge of hiring the best lawyer in the country to fight our battle for us.

I'm afraid to admit that, for a while, I did feel ashamed. But more than that, I was beyond terrified. The repurcussions are endless if a sextape was to be exposed. The damage it could do to a career I worked so damn hard for. And what of my Isaac and his family? It could ruin their high reputation in mere minutes. But the Bourdins' lawyer was worth every cent they paid him, successfully silencing my bully forever and managing to keep our dignity in tact.

Still, it was difficult to find complete peace. The fact that he had seen our videos, even if he couldn't distribute them like he wanted to, made me feel violated. That was, until I talked to my sister-in-law, Annie. She managed to calm me down enough to show me a different perspective I never saw before.

I should own it, she said. There's nothing to be ashamed of. And she's so damn right. The sextape may show us at our most intimate moments but it was of me and Isaac — the man I love, the man I've been with for almost two years now, living with, and having a child with. Though graphic, it was consensual. It showed two people in love in the throes of passion. And how could they shame me for that?

Since then, I've not stopped thinking of Annie's words. But it didn't really hit me until I was at the hospital already. It was then when I decided to own my entire childbirth experience, too. I no longer wanted to be dependent on morphine to ease my contractions. I wanted to feel every breath I took, and every ache that threatened to suffocate and break me from the inside.

So many times, I wanted to give up, thinking the pain would surely win over me. But Isaac, and the idea that we'd soon be meeting our baby, were what got me through it, only for him to remind me that at the end of the day, it was my body that ultimately what got me through to the othger side. What he doesn't realise is that it had everything to do with him, too, for always having loved me exactly as I am.

As a new mother, I'm learning to never again let anyone shame me for who I am or for how I love. And I'll be damned sure to teach our daughter, Eilidh, that too when the time comes.

[vivaballerina]

HOLY MOLY THE ITHACA SAGA

Before I construct comprehensible thoughts- JANASNAKAKAKNSKAKDHBDHCNCJCKDOJSJWNSXLCNKSKSOQIWUWGSGSUDJJCGSJKSKSOAOWISUDUDHHDBEBSBCHDIWBJWIWIQOWNDBSKSKSJSKSJSJJAKQOQOQOSIDYTXTXVSVSHWNNMXZLLZOZSOJWHWHS

Okokokok so- first of all- I spent the entirety of the saga with my hand over my mouth. I said “Oh shit” a lot with varying emotions, and I cried even more with an even wider range of feeling. The best way for me to rant is by song, so:

The Challenge: PENELOPE’S VOICE IS ANGELIC OH MY GODS- and her MUSIC is AHHHHHHH. I love the more ‘classical’ sound (idk I don’t know anything abt music) and Jay was absolutely right about it soaring. Also waiting jumpscare :)))

Hold Them Down: I’ve been waitinggggggg for this song to release ever since I saw the birthday spoof. It did NOT disappoint. Like Ik it shouldn’t be a hype song but I felt so badass listening to it. Actually I think all the “villain’s” songs cuz I felt the same way about Thunderbringer and Get in the Water :)) THE VIBES. Like sending shivers down my spine (in good and bad ways.) AND ANTONIUS’S VOCALS WITH THE SUITOR’S CHANTING IN THE BACKGROUND IS AMAZINGGGGG-

Odysseus: Jaw dropped. The whole dam time. AHHHHHHHHHHHH. Ok so Ody’s electric guitar is BACK and ✨dangerous✨ as ever- ALSO ODYSSEUS BEING CHANTED EXACTLY LIKE POLYPHEMUS’S??? LIKE I GENUINELY THOUGHT IT WAS POLYPHEMUS’S NAME FOR A SECOND. I’ve also been waiting for this one specifically for the “You think I don’t know my own palace?” Line. It was delicious. Also I really love how the final boss battle IS Ody himself- and we’re through the suitor’s pov because symbolism. Imma break this one down a little bit more not at 1:36 am. UM THE SUITOR FUCKED UP WITH THE OPEN ARM SUGGESTION- BUT WHAT REALLY GOT ME WAS ODY’S RESPONSE BEING SO CASUAL? AMUSED? LIKE I WAS SHOOKTH. (Can you tell I’ve been shookth?) AND I WAS DEF JUMPSCARED BY TELE’S MUSIC + QUICK THOUGHT. LIKE ATHENA JUST ADOPTED TELEMACHUS AND I LOVE IT.

I Can’t Help But Wonder: 360 TURN WITH VIBES- and this is where the crying began. It was SOSOSOSOSOSO ADORABLE. It gave me such Dear Theadosia energy and that one makes me cry every time too. And then he hit us with the quick thought. And Athena. AND ATHENA. AND THEY MADE UP. BUT HE’S THE MONSTER. BUT ATHENAAAAAAAAAA

Would You Fall in Love With Me Again?: By this point I was just BAWLING. Before even the song starts after he calls her name I LOVE THE INSTRUMENTAL IT’S SO PRETTY. K, anyways- I love this song. It shows Ody’s character development- his acceptance of the monster rawr rawr rawr- but like by accepting it he can move on? Idk I’m really tired and still kinda crying. But it made me unbelievably warm and fluffy inside while still absolutely gutting me and I LOVE IT. Have I made that point clear yet? Louder for the people in the back? I LOVE ITTTTT.

I’m not ready for criteria yet- I just need to enjoy an overall AMAZING saga and the End. Of. Epic. (Not actually the end but yk what I mean guys.) I literally joined the fandom after the Underworld Saga was released so I honestly have no right to feel sentimental, BUT STILL. IT’S THE END OF AN ERA.

Wait I realized as I put the tags in that the last two titles line up:

I can’t help but wonder, would you fall in love with me again?

[starheirxero]

Lumini angst? Anyone want some lumini angst? (Lyrics are from "Paper Doll" by Flower Face)

[cantdealwiththisnow]

Part 1 - Appreciation post for all the TFP universe Autobot mugshot cameos (known and unknown) in RID2015 3x25 (even if the context is that they've been OUSTED against their will)

[piko-rose]

My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)

When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.

She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.

She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.

She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.

...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.

Remember this line?

You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:

Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?

...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)

As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.

She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.

I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.

...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.

I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.

And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.

She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.

During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.

She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.

But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.

Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.

...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?

But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.

If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.

I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.

She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.

Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.

So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.

She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.

For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.

She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.

But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.

If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.

But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.

He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.

He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)

She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.

He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.

Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.

They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.

None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.

Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.

It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.

Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.

She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.

She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...

She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.

I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.

How much he loves her.

And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.

Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.

It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.

She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.

I feel like this moment here...

-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.

Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.

And it's all thanks to Sonic.

If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.

Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.

He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.

Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.

Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.

They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.

"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

[alongtidesoflight]

so here's my honest thoughts on dragon age: the veilguard, after ~40 hours of playing. i finished the main quest after having finished all companion quests and major faction quests. just to clear up what content i saw, i played as an elven transmasc rook who is a member of the lords of fortune. he romanced lucanis (although after finishing the game i'm now leaning towards taash). i don't know what's happening in playthroughs that have a different race, gender identity, romance or faction going on.

full spoilers ahead, i mean it. don't read further if you want to avoid them. i don't want complaining about it in my asks.

oh and also, if you're worried because of a few negative reviews online i can comfort you by saying don't give a fuck about a certain big name youtuber who is very much tied to bethesda franchises giving this a negative review. i'll explain why.

i'm starting off with the things i liked

the game looks really pretty. i was worried it wouldn't feel like thedas anymore (with them trying to "focus on northern thedas only" i thought they'd make a clear cut in environmental design. they do and they don't. it's complicated. i'll elaborate on it when talking about the negative stuff). anyway it does. minrathous feels like kirkwall. treviso enchanted me like the winter palace did. the hossberg wetlands reminded me of the hinterlands and a couple other inquisition maps. arlathan looked like... arlathan. the crossroads were different, but familiar. overall i like the way it looks and feels. it's thedas, with a twist. it's a good one, and gives everything a solid but unique feel.

combat is top tier. if you're a hardcore dragon age player you WILL miss the tactical aspect of it for a bit, but i promise you, once you're used to the way the combat works, you will be lapping that shit up. and once you get to ability combos you'll mourn the control you used to have over your companions in battle a bit less

the MAIN quest and its story. i expected worse, way worse. and for a while the game even had me tricked (harr harr you'll get it in a second) it is Really That Much Worse. but holy shit was it good. i walked away satisfied ngl.

your choices have SOLID weight. there's consequences, good AND bad. i got minrathous blighted, ruled over by venatori, and the leader of the shadow dragons ultimately died because of my decisions. i made those at the beginning and throughout the game. he died at the end. DAVRIN died because i didn't expect what i was saying to have that much weight. i thought i was in the clear. he had hero status. well turns out, your choices can still get your companions killed even if you do everything right. i fucking love him. he shouldn't have made that sacrifice just because i told him to do everything it takes once.

the inquisitor, morrigan and dorian being there, surprisingly. there's also negatives to this though, see below.

speaking of companions dying and the inquisitor playing a bigger role: the final quest feels like me2's suicide mission. i was blown away by it and the fact that i got to see the results of all my efforts playing out in front of me.

bioware are NOT trying to redeem solas. they love him as a character yes, but i wasn't forced to see any good in him. he betrays you. he fucked my rook over twice. he fucked him over right back, for good this time (the veil wasn't torn down, i anchored it by binding him to it, he's doomed to uphold it). but solas really lives up to his name as the trickster elven god. rip to all the people who grew really attached to him over the years.

varric died. if you like him that's probably as hard reading it as it was watching it. varric died and the game lies about it until the very end. when the realisation hits, it hurts. but in the very best way.

the amount of care they put into gender expression and trans identities this time around. (i'll add onto this with negative points as well too).

rook feels very much ingrained in the world of thedas. he doesn't ask questions that expose the player to lore through dialogue as if he's stepped foot into thedas for the first time. those conversations feel very solid and good. i hope other faction players got as much joy out of this as i did.

and the things i didn't like and boy there's a lot unfortunately

the music. let's just get that out of the way holy shit. it doesn't feel like it belongs in this universe. it gets so incredibly sci-fi-y at times you'd think it's taken straight from mass effect andromeda. there's not a single song unique to veilguard that i really enjoyed. it broke my immersion, real bad. hearing a busker play the tavern songs from inquisition on a lute right after i killed some venatori with wobbly bass songs playing in the background is just odd. weird tonal shift. don't like it. it's made for people who like flashy light-weight cinema.

tevinter nights is required reading. the podcasts are required listening exercises. the game is so fast paced, especially at the start, that there's no time to introduce you to characters and how much weight their names carry in-game. i would not have known who half these people are if i hadn't skimmed over tevinter nights. i'd care even less about them than i already did. there is no time to get properly attached to them. people will act as if you're talking to a legend personified and you'll be thinking man goddamn which chapter of tevinter night were they in again and what did they do???

there's a weird mismatch with the animations. you'll have beautifully fluid ones, like emmrich casting spells. and then you'll have rook's face animating in the most unnatural manner that's sorta reminiscent of mass effect andromeda's "my face is tired" addison, when their emotions SHOULD be landing with the player rn instead.

i'm not vibing with the art style. sometimes it works. most of the time it doesn't. at points i felt like i was watching tangled.

that also brings me to some of the dialogue. same issue. i am watching frozen. i am watching tangled. someone on the writer's team really likes the adorkable trope. bellara is its victim.

for all the talk about identity, bioware sure doesn't like theirs. the grey warden armor got a redesign again and it just makes them look like a generic army. i hate it lol

in general, i don't like the armor design. the wardrobe/appearances system is fine, but it's just not helping if all the armors are just... kinda bland or downight bad looking? and don't get me started on the lords of fortune armor. that is orientalism personified.

the world states should have been carried over, full stop. i know they said they didn't because they want to separate what happens in the north from what happens in the south, which... i could have lived with that. but the inquisitor sends you letters that keep you up to date on... the south of thedas. you learn that there's a blight again, that people are standing strong but it's difficult, denerim's fallen, the rulers are taking care of it, orlais is fighting and they're successful for a while, etc etc. what's good bioware. i thought we don't care about the south this time around. why are you feeding me so much boring generic information. if you're not gonna show any of it and just write letters, then carrying the world state over should not have been an issue. i have a game dev background. those few lines of code would not have broken your budget or pushed your engine's limits. fuck right off.

this gripe of mine carries over to all the cameos. as a lord of fortune you have to deal with isabela a lot. it's fun. i missed her. you get to go drinking with her and taash and bellara! also my hawke romanced her. she's not mentioned once. they had the opportunity to put a sentence or two about her in there with not a lot of effort, trust me.

when varric dies, all she has is a single line about it. for gold, for fortune, for varric. she only says it if you interact with her on your way to the final push. that's not mandatory.

morrigan is there. kieran isn't. the old god soul that mythal and then solas absorbed? who cares at this point, the gods are dead now and solas is locked away for eternity. i suppose? why is morrigan there. she feels unneeded. i wish they'd just left her down south, at least that way i wouldn't have had to witness her god awful redesign.

dorian at least feels as if he belongs in this story. the shadow dragons are a crucial part to protecting minrathous. he's also weirdly underutilised. isabela and morrigan had more lines than him in my playthrough.

on the topic of romance: bro that was underwhelming. no, genuinely. you know when romance picked up a bit? after the point of no return. i heard maybe two lines of companion banter about it before that. maybe i missed something which i honestly doubt, but romance did not play much of a role in lucanis's storyline. i saved his grandmother as he wished me to (and if you read tevinter nights you know she was rather abusive and their relationship not the healthiest) and told him to focus on his family. a reunified family my rook wasn't even introduced to as a partner at the end of all that.

really, do not buy this game if you're only in it for the romances. others might be better, lucanis's basically gave me nothing. except for an outing (the second coffee date i had with him, it was getting repetitive) all of it played out once i committed to the final quest. the sex scene was a fade to black. annoyingly right after davrin died. if you're looking for well paced and good spice, pick up something else. the sweet talk and the final goodbye were nice though.

for all the good the ever-presence of gender identity does, it is brought up in such a disruptive manner too. it doesn't even play out naturally if you CHOOSE the lines that are meant to be said. hearing the words trans and non-binary in this setting doesn't feel right, and i'm saying this as a trans guy. i think it could have been handled more gracefully. the amount of times my rook went "i'm a MAN" as if he's about to start drumming on his chest and roaring any second now got super nerve-grating. "i'm so glad you're into me... the me who is trans. remember?" just. tell me one trans person who'd talk like that to a person they've grown close with and are trying to romance. this game doesn't handle sexuality well, so all this hey my body might not look like the way you're expecting it to look talk amounts to nothing anyway. i feel about this the way i feel about krem: this is partial exposition to trans experiences... packaged up for cis consumption. the ONLY exception to that is interacting with taash. holy shit was all of that heartwarming and bro did it feel good and natural to talk to them about theirs and rook's gender.

rivain and nevarra are new locations added by veilguard. they're also incredibly underwhelming, small and constricted maps. rivain is a coastline with a few ruins. the hall of valor is a partial ruin nestled into a cave on a beach, with a fighting pit. isabela is there in her skimpy outfit commentating your pit fights. that's it. i'm sorry if you were looking for a bustling pirate cove or whatever. you're not gonna get it. the nevarran crypts btw are a long ass dungeon crawl. that's it.

speaking of maps. i thought people were being dramatic when they said you're gonna be fighting the same enemies on them again and again. i thought they were figure of speeching it. they're not. you WILL fight the same amount of enemies. in the same spot. every time you reload the map. best to stay on a map and clear out the enemies and do as much questing on that map as you can before leaving, because you WILL have to do it all over again once you return.

the three choices i made for my inquisitor didn't matter lol she didn't have to face solas and therefore couldn't stop him at any cost as she had sworn (maybe because my rook tricked solas into binding himself to the veil, there was also an option to fight him. would she have stepped in? who knows). blackwall wasn't mentioned. and either her using a small amount of her forces in the final fight was the reason the civilians of minrathous fared so well..... or it just didn't matter. ultimately i think she had very little impact on anything

[ganondoodle]

i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo

[map-of-obsessions]

Is it cringe to say that nerdy prudes has dredged up so many weird emotions for me. Like damn high school really WAS killing me and growing up a loser really sucked

[e-adlirez]

Spoilers for Sinsmas/Sinsmas ramble

So I had Sinsmas paused on my browser to do life stuff as usual, I Will Be Okay was in my head, and I walked back to my computer after life stuff and realized the frame I had it paused on was

D

Do you see what I'm seeing

Their positions aren't just similar, they're reversed. In "I Will Be Okay", Via is on the floor and Stolas's shadow is standing up, looking down on her and reaching a hand to her from above, which she swats away. At the end of Sinsmas, Stolas is kneeling on the floor, with Via looking down at him from above, and her hand resting on Stolas's, which she pulls away from.

AND THE PARALLELS AND REVERSALS DON'T END THERE

From what I could see, it seems like there's only one instance where the parallel doesn't totally apply.

This.

Merry Sinsmas, Helluva Boss fandom :D

:'D

[that-was-anticlimactic]

you know what sucks? when something evokes such intense emotions in like... a good way but you genuinely just cannot explain it and it's not like a normal reaction and like you wanna talk about it with someone who also gets that same amount of emotional over it but no one else does bc it's not an inherently emotional thing?