#BUT STILL TY
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Thank y’all so much for 69 followers
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I LOVE THE NEW THEME
THANK YOU
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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Hi. I'm feeling very soft about our fandom and wish everyone here feels good tonight. So here: have some love and feel free to spread it 🫶
Tysm anon :(<3
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#in the year of our lord 2024 I can’t believe shit is still happening#supernatural#spn#spn memes#ty olsson#dj qualls
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#tim drake#red robin#robin#dcu#dc comics#timsteph#timber#timcassie#curse you dc for making two regular fixtures in Tim’s life be named cassie and cassandra both shortened to cass#do any of the rest of these mf have tags#prolly not#this is so much responsibility#redlynx#timdar#timtam#HOW IN THE FUCK IS THAT NOT ALREADY A SHIP TAG#NOT ONLY WERE THEY IN A SITUATIONSHIP FOR MOOOOOST OF RED ROBIN#LOOK AT IT#TIMTAM!!#SO GOOD!!!#anyways every time another hot person kisses tim drake and he’s like ‘wtf’ and then ‘hmmmm this is not a good idea prolly’ take a shot#like dick grayson is Known for being flirty or whatever (a perception discussed in Detail elsewhere) but tim is (still) SEVENTEEN#and has been in SEVERAL serious relationships and also a few situationships and also had several ill-advised kisses#anyway the reason that timkon (and to a lesser extent jaytim) will always be my faves#is cuz tim can be All Of Himself#and he couldn’t be in p much any of his earlier relationships really#also kon (and Jason when he is Less Murdery) are caretakers and tim Needs That Shit#and he also needs someone to pour all of his Immense Loving Heart into loving and kon and Jason both Need That#they can be So Normal about each other#anyways ty for coming to my tim drake romance ted talk
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get jizzied
I kinda meant for this to be Joel current hc season but in mezalean colours and reminiscing about Lizzie, but dunno if I captured that
#the hair took forever broo#smallishbeans#hermitcraft#trafficblr#hermitblr#life series#life smp#empires smp#empires s1#lizzie ldshadowlady#ldshadowlady#ocean empire#mezalea#jizzie#the superior name#shadowbeans#is for cowards!!!! and you are a smelly idiot if you use it#read that in joel's voice please and ty as it is a joke#jizzie is still superior tho#joel smallishbeans
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The Piedra sisters.
Born and raised in a small mining town in New Mexico. Calida and María Molina have stayed behind to support their parents while Rosita and Madelina have gone off to pursue their dreams. Madelina recently obtained her Ph.D. in geology from Las Cruces College. Rosita works as a baking apprentice and entertainer in Ponyville, Nebraska. Madelina is the eldest, Calida the middle child, and Rosita and María Molina (non-identical) twins.
#mlp#pinkie pie#maud pie#limestone pie#marble pie#my art#fanart#character designs#the grand galloping 20s#ty to everyone who helped with their names#hopefully the puns in their names work#some quick design notes: i wanted all the sisters to wear a dress/skirt; belt; and some sort of hairband that informs their#personality. so pinkie has bows all over. maud has a buttoned skirt and very basic hairband. limestone and marble wear bonnets#their bonnets are also meant to mirror the shape of their wacky hair in the show#they all sorta stand on their tippy toes too#no reason why#also gave pinkie and marble the same eye shape freckles and curly hair to show they're still twins
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Trick or treat ! 🎃
TREAT!
Well just a wip so maybe a treat?
#chip!ask#mai#ty lee#mailee#sokka#zuko#zukka#i had today off#but not egnouth time to finish stuff hahah#(either way good to know that i still know how drawing works!)#this is a wip! sorry!!
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It’s hard for us bitches with auditory processing issues out here :/
#original art#my art#smarty draws herself#comic#1k#2k#3k#EDIT: ty guys for the love. to clarify I made this about a guy I had recently started dating. somehow we are still dating 😭#4k#5k
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mourning black and the death of ideals
#i haven't moved on from this yet. btw. i'm still here#finally decided to draw the thought i've been ruminating over for days on end bc it's like a parasite eating away my brain#stated this on the initial post i made days ago but there's just smt so gut wrenching and sickening#about how dazai will have worn black exactly twice in his life: once as a member of the mafia and now at kunikida's funeral#a color that initially signified devotion to the mafia and his demon prodigy alias now signifies his grief#him having to wear black again at the funeral of another doomed fatalist who chose his heart over his survival. his own partner.#kunikida's death being so reminiscent of the tragedy that initially caused him to defect and flee#and everything tying together full circle and effectively breaking him#asagiri rly said fuck knkdz it's doppover we lost gang 😭😭😭#why did bro leave that fucking notebook behind#fool. do you know that angst potential you have left me to work with?#love never won in bsd. it lay dead and festering#i don't know how much longer i can keep saying i miss them. i'm going to kill myself if he doesn't come back#i've never wanted something to be death bait so desperately#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#(??? technically. its implied anyway)#lotus draws
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happy bkdk day! 😁 (8/9)
#eventually deku will learn.. also the reason why his tie's still fucked up in the anniversary illust is bc bkg couldn't finish tying it LMAO#glad i got this out on time! i am now going to bury myself alive. goodbye#bnha#mha#midoriya izuku#bakugou katsuki#uraraka ochako#bakudeku#bkdk#comic#fan art#becki draws stuff n stuff#bakudeku day
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sometimes you gotta lure your overly-studious ravenclaw gf into spending time with you 🥰 📚 ( from 'Every Teardrop is a Waterfall' by Kat_12739 on ao3, GO READ IT!!! the first story is about seb falling sick and still pushing himself/not admitting he's sick until he ends up in the hospital, the second story is about the birth of seb and clora's daughter and seb's reaction to clora almost dying in childbirth, and the third is about dealing with a fussy newborn lewis😭🥹THEY'RE SO GOOD AND SWEET AND SOMEWHAT SAD (not to mention beautifully written) so go check it out!!💖💖 )
#READ SO I CAN YAP TO SOMEONE ABOUT THEM🙏😩💘#the seb sickfic made me realize how much i needed barely functioning and sick seb (but him still trying to be tough)#theres also a part that cracked me up bc at one point seb is so sick he cant even see straight but he just thinks to himself:#eh its fine.... ill just ask ominis how HE functions without vision later🤷 LMFAO#so stubborn...JUST LET CLORA TAKE CARE OF YOU MFER🤺🤺🤺#defs gonna be drawing more from it especially sick seb LMAO but also seb having a tea party with celeste🥹🥹#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow fanfiction#hphl#choccyart#also i was never planning on writing anything about clora giving birth or abt the kids so to be able to read it WAS AMAZING#THERES A PART WHERE SEB IS HOLDING CELESTE AND CRYING AT CLORAS BEDSIDE THAT I NEED TO DRAW😭😭#LIKE SRSLY seb being conflicted and not even wanting to HOLD celeste bc he doesnt know if clora is alive or not... IT WAS SO SAD BUT GOOD#i honestly dont know what seb would do if clora died in childbirth tbh.......i could honestly see him resenting celeste#esp since she looks so much like clora😭😭#LETS JUST NOT THINK ABOUT IT!😃👍#(still thinking about it)#like this line in the fic: “Sebastian hesitated; if this was Clora’s last gift to him he wasn’t sure he wanted it.”#😭😭😭ITS SO GOOD UGHHHHH😭 TY AGAIN FOR WRITING THESE💖IM SO TOUCHEDDD💖💖
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set after leafpool dies, before the bonus scene w jayfeather dealing w that grief gets resolved. guess who was bitter over a certain cardboard character bitch not being included in that
Next
#welcome to my blog where i *gets hit on the head by an anvil and i fall to hell*#do NOT underestimate lionblaze fans. there are five of them and theyre all fucking stupid#warrior cats#lionblaze#leafpool#squirrelflight#hollyleaf#jayfeather#to the anons in my inbox this is why i havent responded am sorry... will get to u guys when im done w this monster#art#im also having a lot of trouble figuring out the alt text for this. if anyone wants to help itd be greatly appreciated T_T#added ID in alt text! ty curlfeatherstar!!!!! (made a few minor adjustments since that is still in fact leaf in the third image-#squilfs walking towards her!)
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grumbo at the cost of several hours of struggling to draw
i hate anatomy and i hate perspective and i HATE anatomy in perspective !!! It's ok theyre cute :3
#grumbo#hermitshipping#waffleduo#grian#mumbo jumbo#i'm still so full of hubris like if people find my main i am cooookedd lololol#anyways the response on my first post was so sweet ty everyone !! ;u;#my art
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"Soul torn from flesh, nevermore to return"
#ty for the good read dandy!#i may be invisible but i still look good#fanfic#fanart#azzy art#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#art
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