#BUT NOOOO i think i like what i have so far... i spent all evening working on them

[todayisafridaynight]

not to make people believe in me and my work ethic but im lowkey a liiiitttttleeee stoked to share the fics ive been cookin lately..

[dark-and-kawaii]

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ Tease ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

⋆˙⟡♡ Summary: You aren’t sure when teasing your sensei over text became such a ritual, but honestly you wouldn’t want it to be with anyone else. You just never expected him to show up at your door.

⋆˙⟡♡ Notes: (Y/N) is aged up to 18 and is a third year!!! Please enjoy!!

⋆˙⟡♡ NSFW | Sexting | Gojo Gives You Head | Masturbation | Jealous Gojo | Gojo Plays With His Beautiful Thick Cock

(Y/n): “I just want you to know how disappointed I am in you, Sensei."

You decided to tease him over text. 

(Y/n): “Ya know what you did is technically illegal, right?”

Ghoejo Sensei: “~Oh?”

(Y/n): “Mhmm.”

Ghoejo Sensei: “~It’s only illegal if you didn’t like it, but you liked it. Didn’t you?”

With a subtle twitch, you giggle at the memory from earlier… 

You and Itadori were training with the others while Gojo Sensei observed everyone from his spot on the school building. Exhausted, you had decided to grace him with your presence, joining him leaned back against the same wall.

“Aren’t you going to get in there and rough us up, Sensei?”

He could feel your beaming warm smile. Just being around you made his day.

Laughing, Gojo’s voice was filled with pure excitement as always when with you, “Nah, i like watching everyone get thrown around…” -his voice was low so only you could hear-, “…(y/n), you really shouldn’t wear such a short skirt during training.”

“Oh?! Why’s tha-“

“Some might try to sneak a peek.”

That damn smirk of his practically had you melting while your face felt like it was about to catch on fire. 

“S-Sensei? W-why would you say that!?”

Just as you were about to adjust your skirt, you heard the unmistakable snap of a camera shutter, indicating that a photo was being taken on a phone. Glancing down where the noise had come, you were shocked -not really- to discover your sensei positioning his phone under your skirt at an angle where he could see right between your legs…

Staring at the screen, you could see your black lace panties staring back at you as he tried to get another good shot.

He’s never been so bold like this in front of other students… Let alone out in the open on school property. If one of the others saw anything you- fuck, or the higher ups… you both would be kicked off the grounds and- and- oh god the reputation!

Gojo’s would be tarnished and you- … Okay you didn’t really have a reputation to worry about, but still! You damn well would after everyone finds out you’ve been sleeping with the famous sorcerer, also known as your Sensei!! This was far too risky of him-

Slipping his phone back into his pocket, Gojo never once looked in your direction, “~Shhh… No one saw, (y/n). Go back to training though, before i puni-”

“Hey! (Y/n)! Are you coming back!” Itadori was waving for you to come back over to them, his foot on Megumi’s back. 

Now here you are, back in your room, lying on your bed with restless legs as you texted your beloved Sensei.

(Y/N): “I didn’t say I enjoyed it, Sensei 🥺.”

You tried to make the text sound innocent, but you knew how he liked to play games. So, why not play along?

(Y/n): “What did I gain by you snapping a photo? Perhaps I should tell the higher ups?”

GhoeJo Sensei: “~Oh ho, are you threatening me little girl?”

Chuckling to yourself, you could just picture the smug expression on Gojo's face. He wasn't intimidated by you at all, and you were well aware of it. Yet, you found the whole situation amusing.

(Y/n): “Noooo, never! …But… what if I confided in Itadori? Sukuna would hear what happened, and I don’t think he’d like that all too well, now would he?”

Although you couldn't see it, Gojo's playful smile vanished immediately as he read your latest text. He spent several minutes just looking at the screen. It was true, Sukuna had grown quite fond of you- to an extent that was hard to ignore. Sukuna had even managed to gain control over Yuji, solely to rescue you from a special grade curse. On another occasion, Sukuna took control of Itadori's arm, just to drape it around your waist according to what Yuji had told him… And there was that time the notorious king of curses forcibly broke down your room’s door...

Not even realizing how hard he was holding his phone, Gojo’s eyes snapped open fully to the sound of his delicate screen cracking… “tsk..”

Several minutes passed before his phone chimed. It took him a moment to register that you had sent him a photo, a close up shot at that, and it left little to the imagination. You were pulling up your thong so that the contours of your pussy lips could be seen through the thin fabric. Gojo took note of the small little damp spot… It was a simple yet effective tease, but before he could fully appreciate the image, another photo arrived.

In this one, the fabric was pulled taut, accentuating the details even more explicitly. This time, you were pulling up your panties high enough so that they were digging into your crotch, exposing those sweet little pussy lips he could lap at all day long.

(Y/n): “That’s what you wanted, right Sensei? You know if you just wanted photo’s all you had to do was ask 😉.”

After pressing the send button, you swiftly undressed shedding each layer of fabric from your body. As you stripped down the anticipation grew, wondering what your sensei might have in store for you. The silence that followed the Sukuna text left you questioning if it had truly affected him though…

Now completely naked, you position yourself on the bed, ready to capture one final enticing image. On your knees, your tongue playfully extended from your mouth, while your lips form a 'O' shape. With the camera angled just right, it captures the perfect view deep down your throat. Using your free hand, you do your best to mimic the imagery of holding a cock next to your plump lips mouth, your drool cascading down the corners of your lips…

(Y/n): *image*

Ghoejo Sensei: “You’re such a naughty girl for me. ~I’m gonna have to spank you the next time I see you.”

Taking a deep breath you press your face into your bed, raising your ass in the air. Your arm stretched back with your phone, positioning it so that your wet folds could be captured along with your ass.

(Y/n): *image*

Ghoejo Sensei: “Are you touching yourself to my texts, baby girl? Is that tight little pussy craving my attention?"

Your hips moved back and forth as the pad of your middle finger slowly rubbed your clothed clit. It was so sensitive that just the slightest touch would cause a small jolt through your body.

(Y/n): “wouldn’t you like to know.”

Ghoejo Sensei: voice message

Pressing play on the voice message, you can hear the rustling of sheets and clothes being thrown around. Your body shivers when his voice begins.

Ghoejo Sensei: “Don’t worry, daddy will come take care of you.”

A soft whimper leaves your lips. Closing your eyes, you imagine your tall, lean sensei standing in the doorway. His head tilted slightly downward, allowing the shadows to conceal his face except for that damn smug smile…

You could feel your face flush, this was so embarrassing… What if someone barged in your room… Especially Itadori, well Sukuna… Burying the thought deep within your head, you lift your phone above your ass again with the camera pointed down and with your other hand you did your best to spread open your delicate asshole. With a snap and a simple click, you send it…

(Y/n): “I’m ready and waiting.”

Gojo was lying on his bed, his pants undone, hand pumping his cock slowly. With each text he would read, his hand would increase its speed.

(Y/n): *image*

When he saw the last photo, his phone was practically crushed by his tight grip. He could feel his balls tighten as precum began to spill from the tip of his thick cock, the veins swollen around it giving it a nice texture. The sight of your tight hole had him biting his lip as the image replayed in his head, and the fact that you were spreading your asshole to reveal it just for him made him cum instantly.

He could barely breathe, his chest rising and falling as his cum spurted across his chest. His head was thrown back as he released a strangled groan, “such a naughty little tease”.

Of course he wasn’t tired quite yet, he had the stamina of a god and he became rock hard once again. He already looked at you differently from his other students and now after this he really wasn’t going to be able to look at you as just his student he’s having a fling with again. You were a sexual object to be desired now, someone he wished to keep forever, but at this very moment he would give anything to be the reason your asshole was gapping in this picture or why you were drooling in your first photo.

Ghoejoe: “You should come sneak in my room, again.”

You didn’t obliged, instead you sent a string of photos detailing you fingering your ass and probing your slick pussy with two fingers after. Playing with your breasts, rolling your nipples between your fingers, you even captured yourself throwing your head back as you tugged on one of your nipples, as if you were a cow ready to be milked.

You had to admit to yourself that you loved doing this, spreading your legs like some whore for her sensei… The thought alone sent shivers of pleasure throughout your entire body.

Gojo: *image*

It was a photo of his beautiful cock, the head still a deep red and swollen. His thick shaft was covered in his own cum and a bit of precum. You could feel the juices leaking from your pussy as you stared at the photo.

Grabbing your pink vibrator from your dresser you pressed it into your welcoming pussy, your eyes glued to the photo the entire time. Turning the dial to its max setting, the buzzing could be heard as you slid the toy in and out. Pulling the toy out, you quickly placed the head to your sensitive clit, rolling it around your nub. The thought of his large hands on you again was turning you into a moaning mess, you could feel your juices slip past your toy and onto the sheets, could feel yourself cream around the base of it. Fuck, why couldn’t he be here with you now, you needed your sensei, needed your Satoru to come take care of you.

Your hand was trembling making it hard to hold onto your phone yet you still managed to capture a photo of you mid orgasm. There was a stream of clear liquid in the frame, your face full of shock at having squirted was apparent. You couldn’t believe how dirty you felt, it was intoxicating.

“~Oh baby girl, you’re so filthy! Look at you, you’ve gone and made quite the mess.”

Your phone flung across the room while you made the cutest little yip noise, your legs shutting together at the surprise voice. Gojo appeared in your room, his heavenly blue eyes peering at your from behind his sunglasses. His large hands come to your knees and parted your legs so he can rub between your pussy lips with his thumb…

“S-Sensei… I- Why are you h-here…?” Your voice was so cute to him, you could barely even speak as he rubs your slick entrance. “You know why i’m here, (y/n). Now, why don’t you tell me what a dirty little girl you are, and maybe I won't have to punish you so hard this time, hm? Tell your sensei how much you were enjoying yourself and maybe I'll let you suck on this cock.”

He leaned down, his head between your legs. Goosebumps forming whenever his snowy hair tickles your soft thighs. With no hesitation he sticks his tongue out to licks up your folds, lapping up your arousal from before.

“Mmm… Sensei~♡! I-i'm a dirty girl- A dirty little whore for you~!” His tongue was licking all over, teasing your clit with each swipe. He had one hand keeping your legs apart and the other was gripping the sheets.

“Tell me what you're a whore for, baby girl~.” His hot breath against your wet pussy, the way his nose nudges against your sensitive nub.

“I-I'm a dirty- A dirty little cockwhore, S-sensei~. I want you- Need your cock in my- ah~! in my mou-mouth, in my pus- pussy, my ass~~~♡!!”

The way your hips bucked with every swipe of his tongue, the way your breathing was uneven and shaky. Oh the sounds you were making, the moans, the whimpers. His eyes almost rolled back at the feeling of your juices against his tongue, his lips, “That’s my girl.”

Before you could scream his name you bit down on your lip to silence yourself. You can’t afford to have someone hear this… Not when these walls were so thin… You were finally getting what you wanted tonight, attention from your sensei, Gojo Satoru, and you wanted nothing more than to scream his name… But with Sukuna around, quite literally on the other side of these walls, the price you’d pay would be far greater if he heard you and Gojo going at it…

As your back arches, he moves his hand to press it firmly down on your lower abdomen, a way of trying to pin you down as his tongue delves deeper. You were so close to coming undone, your body was trembling.

Gojo knows he’ll drag this out since it was his favorite form of punishment. And he also knows you hold back your noises so that Sukuna wouldn’t hear, and he knows its for your own safety… However, you had him to protect you, he wouldn’t allow anything to happen to you.

Pulling back from between your legs, you both make eye contact, your chest rising with every heavy breath you take…

“(y/n), don’t hold it back… Say my name tonight. Let him hear it, let him know who you belong to tonight.”

A blush forms as you realize what he said.

Gojo wants him to hear you tonight, to hear how good you were for him. To know that he had a claim on his favorite little student…

“B-but…”

“Tut tut, no buts my sweet little cinnamon swirl. The only buts i’m allowing is this one.” He squeezes your ass, earning another cute little noise from you.

“Goj-Satoru… You- I.. We ca-can’t get caught by anyone though.” There’s tears in your eyes, he can see you’re genuinely afraid for him, not for you…

“(y/n). Let me handle the higher ups and everyone else.” Looking down, he watches as your pussy glistens with his saliva… His thumb brushing over your skin, “I’ve always wanted a good excuse to piss off the higher ups,” -His features soft- “You’re a good reason to fight them, so let’s just enjoy ourselves tonight, and don’t worry about Sukuna.”

His lips came down onto yours tenderly, as if you had both been lovers for years. Your eyes shut tight as his tongue glides across your bottom lip, requesting permission to enter. Opening your mouth, his tongue delves into the warm cavern and his cock twitches.

“I’m stronger after all.” He sticks his tongue out at you with a wink before thrusting his cock inside of your waiting pussy. You cry out his name, arching your back so far that it hurt, but the pain was forgotten as soon as you felt his hot cock buried deep within your needy pussy.

“Tonight, let me hear you scream my name.”

[astonmartinii]

hi, i was wondering if you could do one of y/n dating carlos but people start realizing she flirting with charles in the comments, at the beginning in a very discreet way, but after a while she and carlos break up and when the new season starts she’s with charles

all is fair in love and war | charles leclerc instagram au

pairing: charles leclerc x reader

y/n is happy in her relationship with carlos but all that time in the ferrari garage might have her eye wandering

(obvs no intentions to demonise anyone, this is a work of fiction and purely for entertainment purposes)

yourusername

liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc and 55,607 others

tagged: yourbff1, yourbff2

yourusername: no one i'd rather play mermaids with than you two xx

view all 9,231 comments

yourbff1 always the best time with you guys <3

yourbff2 platonic soulmates for real

carlossainz55 my pretty lady

yourusername thank you baby

charles_leclerc i thought i was your baby ?

yourusername just cause you act like a baby doesn't make you mine x

user5 what is going on here lol

user12 not them flirting under her own boyfriend's comment i can't

user34 god i wish i was her

carlossainz55

liked by yourusername, landonorris and 112,309 others

carlossainz55: let's go spa - the second half of the season is a go!

view all 13,405 comments

scuderiaferrari let's go smooth operator

yourusername good luck baby

charles_leclerc where's my good luck

yourusername i'm literally sat with you right now

user33 the hair routine is a need not a want

user19 charles and y/n once again flirting in the comments - am i the only one who finds it weird?

uer13 i mean a bit? but also like the comments are clearly jokes

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 452,091 others

charles_leclerc: monza ready 🇮🇹

view all 14,562 comments

pierregasly you clean up well calmar

yourusername part time driver, full time model

charles_leclerc you'd know all about being a model

user48 i know there's weird vibes with carlos and y/n but like as far as we know they're still together so ^^^ that is still weird

user20 call me a bad person but i want charles and y/n to get togetehr

user1 no cause their vibes have always seemed much more suited than hers and carlos

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, yourbff1 and 60,076 others

yourusername: the only man i'll ever need is mauricio (even if his hair has ruined 50% of my wardrobe)

view all 11,066 comments

user47 this caption... something is off

user60 carlos hasn't liked either and he just posted on his story so he's been active on the app

charles_leclerc but does mauricio have a boat?

yourusername you got him there

user8 okay but like at this point does she just come with the ferrari seat?

user3 tbf i wish i could be with both carlos and charles

carlossainz55

liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 223,098 others

carlossainz55: time well spent with family ❤️

view all 15,203 comments

user44 okay i'm going full conspiracy mode, but y/n has always visited carlos' family with him and the fact she's not been seen at a race since she was left at the airport... i think they've broken up

user11 noooo they were my faves but i think you might be right :(

scuderiaferrari can't wait to see them back in the garage

landonorris where was my invite?

user2 y/n rn^

f1wagsupdates

liked by user1, user2 and 220 others

tagged: yourusername, charles_leclerc

f1wagsupdates: charles and y/n y/ln seen together in abu dhabi - this comes just weeks after her and carlos' break up... do we think that all those flirty comments mean they did actually cheat?

view all 13 comments

user35 they defo cheated but it's also charles so like i'd also be tempted

yourusername people can just be friends you know

user45 so true !! also like carlos has already been spotted with a new girl multiple times all the way back to when he left her at the airport, but for some reason he's the victim ???

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, yourbff1 and 61,207 others

tagged: yourbff1

yourusername: despite popular belief i am a single woman

view all 10,455 comments

charles_leclerc doesn't have to be for long

pierregasly man, you're playing a dangerous game

yourusername maybe we like a bit of danger

user32 yep i'm officially on the charles and y/n train

user10 i know we've said they're probably just joking but i genuinely hope they get together, they seem like they're good for each other

carlossainz55

liked by scuderiaferrari, landonorris and 429,561 others

carlossainz55: no better way to do winter break

view all 14,034 comments

user13 they're so so cute

user55 omg maybe carlos might actually have a girlfriend who doesn't constantly flirt with his teammate

user30 the way that she's still be demonised for harmless comments when he was seen with isa way before carlos and y/n broke up and got with her officially within a week of the breakup

comments have been limited on this post

yourusername added to their story

[caption: pasta day is my favourite day]

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 709,822 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: all is fair in love and war

view all 94,034 comments

user56 HOLY SHIT

user21 AHHHHHHHHHHHH

yourusername i'd fight this war all over again to end up with you

user48 I KNEW THEY WOULD BE CUTE

user88 okay now i don't feel so bad for rooting for them

f1wagsupdates

liked by user5, user9 and 330 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, yourusername

f1wagsupdates: though controversial in the way it came about, i for one love this relationship - what do you guys think?

view all 14 comments

user11 carlos did this and way sooner so i am defo a fan of this relationship

user49 they slay i don't care what anyone says

user2 i love it and she's a smart queen cause she doesn't even need to buy any more new merchandise

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 98,134 others

yourusername: made the super long journey to the garage next door

view all 17,560 comments

user31 she's so so pretty

charles_leclerc thank you for making such selfless sacrifices

yourusername good thing you're worth it

user41 i need to meet her

user10 the shady hand covering the other one

charles_leclerc

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 1,023,671 others

tagged: yourusername, scuderiaferrari

view all 21,067 comments

user46 SLAY CHARLES

yourusername pretty boy with a pretty trophy - i'm so so proud of you xx

charles_leclerc you're much prettier than my trophy baby

user90 parents

carlossainz55 happy for both of you

charles_leclerc thanks bro

yourusername it was unorthodox but we're both happy now and that's all that matters

note" hope you enjoyed, this ended up so much longer than expected but i had a lot of fun writing this !! my asks are still open for any other requests xx

[keyotos]

disgusting

summary ⎯ after a long day, all you want to do is relax with your boyfriend.

tags ⎯ gn!reader. tooth-rotting fluff. ONE minor innuendo. basically alhaitham is in love.

tana's words ⎯ hi guys sorry for the mini hiatus but i'm bored and i am going to write this very quick and very simple drabble just bc

"why do they always have to run?" you complain as you settle onto the couch that alhaitham was quietly reading on. "i mean, it's never gonna do anything. like, we are the matra. we can catch up to you at any second, but noooo, running will most definitely allow you to evade us," sarcasm dripped from your voice.

alhaitham puts down his book and turns his attention towards you. earlier that night, when you arrived home, you barely even greeted him. now, alhaitham is not one to get clingy due to the fact that you didn't greet him with as much affection as usual, but he was missing you quite a bit (not that he'd ever let you know that), so he was concerned.

the affection you had given him prior tonight was a chaste kiss on the lips. it wasn't much, but it still meant a lot to him, whether he showed it or not. tonight, you pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek. ridiculous, alhaitham is well aware, but it still raised some concern within him. your actions meant you probably had a stressful day, which made alhaitham want to know more.

when did he start finding himself enthralled with your very essence? there was no switch to define when his feels for you developed to more than just friends. only a heavy beating in his heart when he was around you. only a feeling of airiness in his chest when he spoke to you.

"what happened today?" alhaitham asked calmly, being the complete opposite to your frazzled antics while describing your hectic day. to help you relax, he began to rub his hands up and down your thigh. you melted into his touch instantly, letting out a deep breath.

"oh you know. the usual research fraud. wasn't even that bad actually. he was probably going to get like, what, two months of suspension and eight months of community service? better fate than most. but instead of surrendering, he chose to run all the way from sumeru city to gandharva ville!" you ranted, throwing your hands in the air to indicate your frustrations. "and he even tried to hide. from the matra. from me! like, you're cornered like a deer here, might as well surrender and make it easier for everyone else."

you rubbed the thigh that didn't occupy alhaitham's hand, "also, i'm sore as hell. all that running from sumeru city to gandharva ville and then all the way back has me spent. i feel like i'm not gonna be able to walk for days."

alhaitham lightly scoffed in response. you were tough, one of the matra's best at that. alhaitham could also think of instances where you couldn't walk, yet pulled through for the next day (ignoring his advice to stay home). however, he wasn't going to comment about that at the moment.

his gaze never left you the entire time. alhaitham was so incredibly focused on your face, studying you and focusing on you like a researcher would, hoping to never let something as brilliant as you go. his eyes traced the movement of your mouth every time you groaned; the way you squeezed your eyes shut when you raved about another frustration; the way your hands moved sporadically through the air.

again, when did go from simply observing you to essentially admiring your every move? and why is it so easy to do so?

"hey," you dragged out the word and poked his cheek. "were you even listening to me? or were you just gawking at me?"

alhaitham is snapped out of his daze, refocusing back on your words. well, he was always focused on your words. just not at this moment. "of course i was listening," alhaitham rolls his eyes teasingly, "if he ran all the way to gandharva ville, maybe he had more to hide. why else would he go through all the trouble? or maybe your face scared him so much he felt he had to run far, far away."

you rolled your eyes, "very funny, acting grand sage. are you trying to get involved in matra business now?"

"quite the contrary," alhaitham countered, "just wanted to get involved in my partner's life. is that a crime?"

"yes," you replied instantaneously. "you'll be arrested now. hope you know that you're getting the life sentence," you grinned, grabbing his wrists and placing them by your hips. you were caged underneath him, smiling wide as ever.

alhaitham finds it hard to not smile back at your antics. most of the time, he tried to keep a stoic composure to keep people away and hide his intentions. but with you, he finds that it all melts away, leaving it only you and him and nothing but bliss.

you were the first to break the silence, "so... were you actually listening to me or were you just making inferences based on what i was saying earlier?" your voice was nothing above a whisper, letting it be known that it was only you and him in the house.

"'course i was listening to you," his voice matched your soft tone, words filled with sincerity and admiration, "how could i not with a voice as sweet as yours?"

and that's when you lose it. you lose it for two reasons: alhaitham was teasing you and you knew that during your entire rant you sounded anything but sweet. malice and exasperation flowed through you as you spoke about today's events. alhaitham was simply pulling your leg, the bastard.

but, that did prove that he was listening. only he would be able to distinct the way your words moved through the air, tainting it with annoyance and irritation. only he would know.

you shoved alhaitham off of you, sending him back to the other side of the couch. "you're disgusting!" you giggled and shoved his shoulder, "i've had enough of you. i'm going to bed," you grabbed a pillow from the couch and shoved your face in it, hoping that alhaitham wouldn't be able to see your blush.

but of course, alhaitham sees through you yet again. "okay. i'll see you soon," he picked up his book and continued to read, knowing that you'd be next to him in a matter of seconds. if you weren't in the matra, you would have had a fulfilling career as a researcher with your curiosity.

"what are you reading?" you rest your head on his shoulder, peering at the pages. you let the pillow that you were holding go, now discarded to the side as you moved towards your boyfriend.

alhaitham closed the book to show you the title, which you read out loud, "remarkably bright creatures. taking a break from nonfiction?" you turned your head to look at him. that feeling alhaitham had in the beginning of your relationship came back, his heart thumping wildly in his chest. no matter how many years you two have been together, alhaitham thinks that he will never be able to shake off the feeling of being in love with you.

"needed to replenish my pallet," he shrugged simply. his vagueness made you even more curiouser, alhaitham's goal in the first place. you could chalk this up to him trying to engage your interests again, but really, alhaitham just wanted your affection. as stupid as it sounds, alhaitham is a man who (at the end of the day) just wants his partner's touch.

you let out a hum and move closer towards him. you had your knees raised up to your chest, reading the words alongside him. your arms were touching, your head almost leaned onto his shoulder.

once you found yourself fascinated enough with the novel, alhaitham took this as his chance to get you closer. he grabbed your waist and pulled you into him, now so close that he could feel the air exhale from your nose. you, too distracted from the words in front of you, didn't seem to pay any mind.

"'as a general rule, i like holes,'" alhaitham began to read from the book, causing you to subvert your gaze towards his face, "'a hole at the top of my tank gives me freedom. but i do not like the hole in her heart. she only has one, not three, like me. tova’s heart. i will do everything i can to help her fill it.'”

"you know," your fingers dance along the bicep that you've curled under, "this octopus reminds me of a certain someone. impassive on the outside, yet he cares about others on the inside."

"comparing me to a sea animal now? i'm surprised you've hit a new low," alhaitham teases you. he accepts your compliment by kissing you on your jaw.

"shut up!" you swat at the same bicep you were just relaxed under, "if i was really comparing you to a sea creature, you'd be a sea lion. cute on the outside, but horrible on the inside," you exaggerated.

alhaitham smirks, "you think i'm cute?"

you immediately notice where you've went wrong. you can't hide your flustered expression from alhaitham this time. you wouldn't be surprised if the bastard planned this. "i also said you were horrible."

"but you also said i was cute," he retorted as if he was boasting.

"emphasis on was. maybe not anymore," you couldn't help but smile at your response.

alhaitham pressed a kiss to your temple, "really? not at all?" he raised an eyebrow as he looked down into your eyes. they say eyes are the window to the soul, and alhaitham is one to think that it is true. he didn't really believe it before he met you, but now, everytime alhaitham looks at you it's as if he can understand everything you're trying to say based on one gaze.

alhaitham was already leaning forward when you decided to kiss him, like he knew that it was coming. cocky, you wanted to think. but you know that's not the truth.

alhaitham knows you so well that it's disgustingly endearing.

hi guys!! sorry i've been away for so long. my writer's block has been so bad and it also doesn't help that i've began my six-week volunteer program as well as other work. i'll try to regulate updates to be asap, but i still dk bc of my crazy schedule. hopefully i'll be able to update more often, but until then!

[seaofreverie]

They Might Be Giants at the Roundhouse, London, 17th November 2024

Happy 35th to Flood, hooray!!!! So here's this thing that I've put together just in time for this occasion, my written record... I mean, my very lengthy and detailed review of the first and so far only TMBG show I’ve attended, on November 17th 2024 in London, so, the last show of the so-called “30th anniversary” Flood tour.

And yeah, I mean it that this thing is lengthy and mostly my personal insights on stuff but still, I wanted to share it since this was an event that I’d been anticipating for many many months, and I tried my best here to capture all the feelings this day brough and the whole magic and all the amazement surrounding it.

I’m also going to put here all of the 7 videos I took during the show, ranging in length from 7 seconds to 7 minutes. And they were taken from the front row, so the view is pretty great and something worth sharing I think!

So yep. Hope you enjoy!!

Every once in a while a day comes along in your life that feels like it’s been taken straight out of a movie. It’s hard to tell how often that happens, but probably not too often, since I can’t remember the last time it did before this. And what I mean here is that the day of my first TMBG show was pretty much nothing but moments that somehow felt just RIGHT, like everything was coming together just PERFECTLY, so that I could have the best possible experience and the best imaginable time!! Starting with my biggest wishes and hopes, down to all the extra details that I didn’t even think about previously. But anyway…

Before the show…

You’d think that I would start officially #freakingout about one of my biggest dreams in life coming true (seeing my favourite band, who are also one of my biggest special interests, in REAL LIFE, and enjoying one of their amazing live shows IN PERSON) earlier than this, but that only actually started on the evening of the day before the show. And because of that the entire next morning and afternoon felt really weird and tense in a way that I can’t really describe. But I hope you get what I mean. It’s like wow, it’s finally happening, but noooo wait hold on, I’m not ready yet…

And so my travel companions and I spent most of the day walking around Camden Town where the show was taking place, but for me that whole time was this really weird mix of feeling like I’m walking on clouds and like I’m just entirely somewhere else and also awaiting the scariest most important exam of my whole life.

We arrived by the venue sometime around 1 PM and when I saw the poster plastered on the wall that listed “An Evening With They Might Be Giants” among other acts, that was the moment when it maybe finally hit me that THIS THING WAS REAL. And maybe this is a good time to mention that the only thing left on the long list of all the things that could possibly still go wrong at this point, was managing to get a spot as close to the stage as possible, so, in the first row. And there were already two people just standing there by the venue when we got there and I actually couldn’t tell if they were already queuing up because, well, it was still so early. But I’m about 100% sure now that, in fact, they were.

Another important thing to note is that I was hoping to meet my friend at the show, who also attended the previous night’s show in Bristol, and me impatiently awaiting any sort of updates on how all of that went definitely added to all the nervousness I was feeling that whole day. And also, when I decide on something, well, I’m stubborn as hell so it HAS to go the way I planned it or I will be pretty much devastated.

But it was still super early and we had to get dinner and all that stuff so we left for now. And after some time I eventually got a message from my friend saying that NO, 5:30 will be too late for the first row, probably, and I was uhhhh, very on edge at this point. But ok. Better wait too long in the queue than regret not getting there earlier forever.

It was probably a pretty unusual sight to my brother (who I dragged along with me to the show) when I practically RAN to the venue when we were close to arriving there sometime past 4 PM. I swear I remember imagining that I’m already seeing a huge queue of people in front of me somewhere in the distance until I get closer and am relieved that no, no such thing happening, thank god. I mean, well yes, I was REALLY not even remotely chill about this whole thing guys. And yeah, it’s important to mention that I did travel over 1500 kilometers or so just for this show and nothing else. The whole trip and all the sightseeing I did in London in the days leading up to this day and afterwards was just an added bonus.

But alright, we got there. And what we were met with instead were maybe 15 or so people who were mostly scattered in small groups around the entrance. And a guy playing an accordion. Just in case I needed that extra confirmation that, yes, the gig I’m going to will be HERE and not in some other place. Yet I still had this worry as I started talking to one group of fans that waitttt, maybe they’re actually talking about some other band and I’m making a fool of myself…

But well yeah anyway, we were there, it was time to just wait for the big event now, time to be brave and use this opportunity to chat with other fans even a bit… And so I did, and despite not really having any opportunities to actually TALK in English to other people most of the time, I think I did pretty well. One thing that stuck with me the most for some reason was how these two guys were talking about how one of them doesn’t like BOOK and how that’s scandalous according to the other guy pretty much, and the other guy's statement on Synopsis For Latecomers was that whatever your opinion might be on the song, it’s still definitely a THEY song (I love that and I think about that all the time now, like man, it really is just They in a nutshell in a way).

And then my friend and their bestie arrived!! Just after we (all the people who were waiting already) decided to form some sort of actual queue. We found ourselves at the end of it, at least for now… And the remaining 2 hours of waiting for the doors to open were before us. It dragged on a bit of course but not TOO terribly, since I could catch up on all sorts of stuff with my friend, because we haven’t actually seen each other in oh, well over a year!

We talked about the Bristol show too among many other things, and I learned some important things, such as how Lie Still, Little Bottle got played already the day before, soooo… probably not much of a chance of it returning this evening (this might be like the only real thing I wish was different about this day because, AAAAHHH, THE STIIIIIIIIICK!!!!!! how I’d have loved to see that… But never say never, maybe it just wasn’t meant to be just YET!). And also how today the queue was luckily much smaller so, no being stuck in the third row this time!

Also, it started raining eventually, as it does in the UK, right, (it actually wasn’t rainy at all for most of the week I stayed there, just that day pretty much… another one of very few somewhat unfortunate things about this day) and it rained for probably close to an hour, and by god, did it get freaking FREEZING very fast. I inevitably had a huge cold for several days afterwards because of this, but well, what even is this sort of sacrifice, when in exchange you get the best possible concert experience. Because yeah, it definitely paid off to get there early, the queue never got SUPER long but still, wouldn’t have ended up where we did if it weren’t for that long wait.

And maybe now I should say some more general things about the wait, which is that this whole time, when I wasn’t feeling impatient, I was really just, truly soaking it all in (and not just the rain, lol). And a crucial part of that whole wait was that the accordion guy was still playing his songs, many songs of TMBG and at least a couple of John Linnell’s State Songs. I realize now that I should have written them down right after the show, because now all I remember him playing are Erase, South Carolina and West Virginia.

One funny thing that happened was when some guy walked by our (by then) pretty long queue and seemed surprised that there were so many people waiting for something. So my friend told him that we were waiting for a show and that it was a They Might Be Giants show, but what did he actually hear??

The guy: …Michael Jackson? But he’s dead!

So I guess that English speakers will also get the band's name terribly wrong sometimes, not just every vinyl vendor I’ve ever talked to back at home, lol. But yeah, he eventually got the name right but still, it’s really funny to think about… There May Be Giants, Michael Jackson… it’s all the same thing.

But alright, the last few minutes were drawing near… And then, at long last, we were in! And I guess I was so caught up in the moment (and also the fact that the security guy had a bit of an issue with my metal pins that I put on my jacket without really thinking about this possibly being a problem, oops) that I almost screwed up big time in a way because hey, we’re in, you’re free to go now, get your spot by the stage as fast as possible!! And so I got myself together, followed the example of my friend, and did that.

And ok, all in all, this was absolutely surreal to me. Only the very first of the many biggest this CANNOT be real moments of the night. Realizing that wow, we’re actually here… Nothing went terribly wrong in the end, we travelled all this way just to get here and here we are. And we’re in the first row!! OH MY GOD!! The folks who were ahead of us in the queue lined up by the left side and the middle of the stage, so we ended up to the right of Linnell’s keyboard and right in front of Marty’s drumkit. So we still had a very good viewing point if you ask me!

And I could NOT believe how close we were, the stage and all the instruments were SO CLOSE!!! This was actually my first time being in the pit at a concert, I’ve only ever known the balcony view… Meanwhile here they were, the legendary Main Squeeze in the REAL WORLD, the jackalope thingy on the drum kit that says They Might Be Giants… The pre-show music was blaring, everyone else was getting excited and I was suddenly HIT by all of it and how unbelievable and amazing and perfect it was and I was so so close to just crying right there because of it all…

But well, I collected myself and faced the fact that there was still at least an hour of waiting ahead of us (turned out to be an hour and a half, because the doors opened earlier than originally scheduled, but the show didn’t start until the original 8 PM anyway). But at least we were inside now, so no more freezing! And we could actually even sit down for a while finally (not that anyone besides me or my two friends did that from what I could tell, for once I managed to not care about how I appear to others and do what’s considered “normal” and it’s so great and important and such a big part of why this was such a wonderful evening in the end).

I also need to say that wow, Flansburgh’s intermission playlist really is so good. Not gonna lie that I was really excited for this part of the show as well, and I even had some very satisfying moments of recognizing a song or two and telling my friends about it (Funkadelic’s Can You Get To That will have a very special association for me now because that’s what was playing when we first got there). Some other memorable moments include when crew members were milling around the stage, and I’m pretty sure that none other than Stan Harrison walked in for a moment too?? Because those moments also served as constant reminders that THE GUYS will be here too, so soon…

Show time!!!

Set 1

Alright, time for what we all actually came here for. Time for the show. The lights went down for a moment, there were moderate amounts of screaming that made me feel like I’m back on a school trip visiting a theatre with other kids, who start screaming the moment it gets dark right before the play starts. But this time I was (even if just mentally) screaming along.

The recording of the song They Might Be Giants started playing, we watched a short animation on that huge screen at the back of the stage, and then, the scariest and most unexpected thing happened. The whole band walked in and after a couple seconds launched right into Synopsis For Latecomers. And I’m saying this kind of as a joke but actually though, can we agree that the emotion that comes with the first time you see *your band* in the real world is just something else completely and kind of impossible to describe. Because in a way it’s also just so funny: you arrived here specifically with the intention of seeing these guys and then, when that actually happens, it feels like the most shocking event of your entire life. A little MIND ERROR moment, wait hold up kind of moment, or even… a Brain Problem Situation, if you will.

But ok, I also need to admit that it didn’t help when I got distracted over the fact that less than half a minute into the song, someone from the crew walked onto the stage to fix something about Danny’s guitar. And with all that stuff put together I was only half aware of what was even happening and being played most of the time, and like a second passed before we got to the horns part of the song, and the horns entered the stage (accompanied by cheering from everyone). And it was all just. Happening. Right in front of me. Like it’s nothing and no big deal at all.

But anyway. While I’m still on the topic of this song I need to say that out of all songs played this one still stuck with me probably the most in a sense. Because days after the show I could still hear it still playing in my mind aaaaaaaall. the. damn. time. So all in all, this was definitely a total BLAST of a first impression. This is an amazing live song, and a 10/10 show opener, which I think is also fully supported by my reaction to it, as documented here. And the horns!!! The horns, ladies and gentlemen!!!

After the first song we got greetings and an introduction from Flansburgh, who said that this was the last show of the run of Flood shows… and that they had to figure out a way to include all songs from Flood in the show. So what got played next was the obligatory Particle Man, something that I found myself being all sort of like “alright, of course…” about at first... I mean… it is funny and don’t get me wrong, this song is great live, and I loved the whole “Triangle Man, take off for the planet, for the planet VENUS!” bit of course (oh it was really really great and GRAND and loud), but I guess this also shows how very quickly I got into this whole spirit of a regular TMBG show goer of sorts, who already sort of resents one of the most played songs… even before actually hearing it.

Next up was Meet James Ensor and here’s another really funny thing: how surprisingly hard it can be to identify the song that’s being played during a show. You know them all and know all the lyrics, and yet you aren’t aware of what you’re actually singing??? *HOW* does that work!! Because the whole time I thought it was actually James K. Polk, later I couldn’t remember which of the two it was actually… And I only realized which song this actually was on the next day, when a random bit of conversation reminded me that yes, those were the lyrics of Ensor that I was singing yesterday.

However, you must forgive me for these follies, because it’s hard to think clearly when you have to catch up with the fact that without pause, the next thing played is The Famous Polka. It’s like oh my god it’s actually THE Famous Polka. The infamous Famous Polka stage collapse incident (so, the first thing that comes to mind concerning this song, to me) aside, another notable thing about this song is that it’s SUCH a blast of energy live. I want to say that around this point of the show I started really getting into it and singing along and stuff (well, not singing yet on THIS song) and I’ll add some more general thoughts of this nature at the end of the post but by god, is the pure energy and excitement of a TMBG show impossible to convey in any recording. I think you just really have to be there to really understand what it’s all about. And a song like this one might be one of the finest examples of that.

And now, for something completely different… Moonbeam Rays! Lovely song that mostly helped me get into the mood of how beautiful this whole moment was, you know… I might be wrong about when exactly that was, but I got seriously close to crying once more during the show, and it’d be probably a fair guess to say that it was sometime during this song. And afterwards, we got some more insights from Flansburgh.

JF: This is the last show of the Flood show thing. (audience makes a sad “oooooh” sound) Yeah, it’s a little bit sad… it’s a little bit *excellent!* (audience laughs)

And then the Johns started talking about how they “started doing this pre-pandemic…” And it delighted me SO MUCH that they pointed this out because I could never get over how the Flood anniversary tour started when the album turned 30, and at the time of the last show of the tour it was two months away from turning 35!!

JF: It’s taken more years to celebrate the anniversary of Flood than it took to *make* Flood.

But as Flansburgh said, it was time to move on to some other, less popular things… And also he shared with us that he walked through a beautiful part of London today, wondering how it would feel to have enough money to “belong there”. Linnell said that he was resting up for the big flight, and that he was actually resting up for it RIGHT NOW.

JF: There’s nothing John Linnell likes more than a *paid rehearsal*.

JL: It’s a sweet ride… When you get to be *this* age…

JF: Nothing matters at all.

JL: Every day above ground is beautiful.

If you ask me, that last sentence deserves to be immortalized as one of the most iconic stage banter moments, and in a way it already has, because it inspired this wonderful piece of art, and who knows what else.

The following songs were Letterbox (and a short break from singing from me, because that song is already impossible to follow with, and then you add all the excitement of the moment and it’s impossible impossible) and Twisting!!! This started a long series of songs where the moment it starts I get super excited because I KNOW this song is a huge deal and a favourite but it takes me at least a couple of seconds to get to WHY this is a huge moment… through remembering and recognizing the song. And AAHHHH this song was so amazing, the bridgeeee, and then also the extra outro with the guitar solo and all, the energy!!! God, it truly is incomparable. And I totally didn’t expect that outro so that made it all an even better time.

And so we were well into the Flood songs segment, because next up was another of my top favourites from the album, Someone Keeps Moving My Chair! And another wonderful sing-along moment, but honestly, which of all these songs was not… (other than Letterbox, but that was just because of my lack of practice with that one). Chanting the title of this song, especially that one penultimate, elongated CHAAAAAAIIIIIIIR, kind of healed something in me I think.

After that was done, the Johns gave us some more insights into the performer’s life and all the things that they’ll never get used to, such as crowds that continue beyond your line of sight.

JF: …So you sort of think like: “I gotta get these people going, I gotta rock these people…” And then it’s like: (said in a silly, high-pitched voice) “But there’s no end!...”

Flansburgh remarked on the special challenge that they had come across this time, which was that we were all in a circular room, which is exciting, but means that people continue past where the stage is…

JF: I hope you guys got your tickets on Stubhub or something. I mean, can you even see us? I can barely see *you*. In a hockey match this would be unacceptable.

Another thing that Linnell would never get used to was when there’s a huge crowd of people, all of them happy and singing along, but then there’s one guy “who’s got this sort of Charles Manson expression”. This one really made ALL the people laugh. The Charles Manson guy included I hope.

JL: Never got used to that! For some reason.

JF: Tomorrow: Get. Linnell.

(JL pretends to be writing something down)

JL (addressing the audience): Not to put any ideas in your mind…

But moving on, as I said it was more Flood time indeed, with Whistling In The Dark. Me calling each single song amazing and a blast and so much fun is probably already getting a bit repetitive by now, so one special point of interest with this one and its live version is when near the end we get this little vocals only moment and then the horns come in again, then joined by everything else with such fanfare… simply triumphant.

Also, maybe this is a good moment to say that man, on one hand thinking about this show and how I’m going to hear THE ACCORDION was always a huge deal, but even then, I wasn’t prepared for how cool the accordion really is in person. It sounds kind of different from what I’m used to from recordings, and definitely makes a heck of a great impression all in all. One could wonder why it’s not more popular in rock music, because really, just how amazing is it?? And it can create all sorts of moods.. which is something I’m just about to get into properly too. Also, speaking of horns, Flansburgh gave a special shout out to the horns at this point, and began to introduce the next song.

JF: This next song is called The D-... uh, I forgot what it’s called, but… (JL laughs)

Even if it weren’t for this slip-up with the name, I already could tell from how Flansburgh went back to talk about how this was a song put together by Stan Harrison and introduced all the guys individually… That *IT* was in fact happening, one of my biggest hopes when it comes to songs I wanted to hear in person the most. The Darlings Of Lumberland - THE horns song to beat them all. And at this point I had to get my camera ready and start recording because well, this would definitely be one of the most preservation-worthy and outstanding moments of the show.

I was not mistaken of course, the way all the instruments complement each other here, most importantly the horns and the accordion, is something beautiful. This is one of the best examples of how the studio version just sounds so WEIRD to me now, even though it’s been my big favorite for a long time in that form as well. All in all a hypnotising moment, and coming back to my earlier question, maybe THIS was the only other song that you don’t really sing along to, because you have to just. Take it all in. Soooo much going on. And yes, no less important, THE CHOREOGRAPHY - *EVERYONE* did the hand thing!!! So you know, another good reason to have this one specifically caught on film.

Anyway, I was going to put my phone down for the time being but THEN... could it be, another of my top wished-for songs?? Cause yeah, without a pause we got the one and only screaming introduction to Let Me Tell You About My Operation from Flansburgh and oh boy, is this yet another song I could talk for many minutes about. First of all, I had very very high hopes for one of, what I think is often referred to as, Flansburgh showman moments. So, songs such as this one, Lie Still, Little Bottle, She’s Actual Size, and a couple others.

This song is a whole new story live, alright. Again, you have to be there to really get what it’s all about I think. JF’s energy is very infectious and awesome here to put it just mildly, and the horns add a whole lot, the whole song is just one big moment of old-timey big band-style musical bliss. And then there is also time to shine for all the other guys in the band, with awesome solos from Dan and Marty (ok, it appears that there was no special Danny time though?? Sad), AND the horns on the horns. Also Linnell doing this sort of thing on the keyboard where he plays all the notes quickly, sort of sliding down or up all the keys… Ok, I looked it up, I think that’s called glissando? So yeah, that also stuck in my head especially, because it was so fun. One of the top 5 moments of the show, without a doubt.

And now, alright, When Will You Die? is not a song that ever struck me as much of a favourite, besides being a very outstandingly hilarious and real song when it comes to lyrics of course, but I can’t lie and say that I wasn’t very happy to hear this one too. Singing these lyrics in a room full of hundreds of people who did the same was an incredibly grand moment, ok.

And then… then we were met with the haunting sounds of the intro of Road Movie To Berlin. A song that’s still, even after dozens of relistens, a whole experience each time I hear it when listening to Flood, and, as you might expect, it’s even more of an experience live. And I’m of course mostly talking about this whole sort of breakdown section near the end, but just the whole entire thing really hits anyway.

So when it started I definitely had a little moment of “oh shit, here we go, THE moment is here…”. Something akin to this happened over and over during the whole show obviously, but still, I feel like it was especially big here. Another thing is how later my friend laughed that they once again felt like they were the only person singing the secret third verse. Well, at least one more person did (me). Anyway, all in all it was just, magical, truly.

So, uh. Now, enjoy some top-notch banter that followed.

JL: So, uh, what’s going on here.

JF: We’re in London, John.

JL: We’re in London, we’re doing songs from Flood.

JF: We’re in yet another circular building.

JL: Right.

(a moment of silence)

JF: We’re doing songs from Flood. This is one of them.

(some people in the audience make clearly audible “wooo” noises)

JL: We get to woo.

(people laugh and woo even louder)

JL: There’s this thing in Britain where people get creative with the interactive thing. And it’s kind of good and it’s kind of, like… it worries us. The drunken part of it. It’s a problem.

(someone in the audience laughs in a very pronounced drunken manner)

Ok, Women And Men, that was the next song. Not much to say about this one to be honest, or like, anything at all really. And then more Flood, in the form of Your Racist Friend, which totally rocked, and we, I mean WE specifically, had the pleasure of standing where we could enjoy how Jordan Katz played his trumpet solo right in front of us. Honestly, this was kind of the only major downside of standing where we stood, that the horns were kind of hidden from our view for the most part… So this was a GRAND moment.

I have found that no matter how many times I watch recordings of it, the way Stellub gets introduced at these shows is always extremely funny to me, so here’s, like, almost all of how that went this time.

JF: Folks, we’ve got a very special treat for you right now. When we first embarked on doing these Flood shows, we thought: what can we do to make the show a little more challenging, a little more of… an endurance test. So we thought, we’ll take the time out to learn a song *sonically in reverse*...

(a long pause prompting audience laughter)

JF: …present it to the crowd… who might not enjoy that. (audience laughs) But then, we’re going to record it, on our very special fancy video recording machine, and we’re going to reverse the tape, and present it to you at the top of the second set, which will be… *pure entertainment*.

(audience laughs and woos. claps, also)

JF: …so think of the next two and a half minutes as a *musical investment in your future* (audience, well, laughs). If you brought friends here, we understand; they might be looking at you, going: “WHY?” (audience laughs some more) “Why this, why now? Life is complicated enough, why do bands *insist* on performing songs in reverse?”. But I can assure you, it’s a huge payoff. Especially if the machine works.

At this point I should give a shoutout to my uninitiated brother, who is not a fan of TMBG and whom I sort of dragged along with me here, although well, he did agree to this whole thing (besides the standing in the rain for two hours. He says that’s the part that he didn’t need to experience but well, what could *I* possibly do about that). Because he told me later that yes, the song in reverse thing was pretty cool. Well, I guess I could say as much anyway from how he definitely seemed very amused by Flansburgh’s introduction. But he also told me that if they didn’t say anything about this song being played in reverse, he wouldn’t even be able to tell, because it didn’t sound all that different from all the other songs. So I guess that answers my question of how newcomers may perceive TMBG’s lyrics, in a way. At least in the live show environment. It must be a lot to take in at once.

But anyway, the Johns joked about this whole thing some more (and how the screen was unusually huge for them and had this whole sort of 70s delay effect) and Linnell informed us that he would kick one of his shoes off at the end of the song and that we would also see THAT backwards.

JL: It’s just gonna be CRAZY! It’s gonna look… can’t even describe it.

JF (in silly gruff voice): Tonight! On video tape!

So, Sapphire Bullets Of Pure Love. You know, it’s just yet another of those things where I’ve been awaiting THIS MOMENT, IN REAL LIFE for so long. Very fun and at this point I sometimes even feel like I might be more familiar with the reversed sound of this song than the original… Like, it comes to mind more often. “stiiiiillub rah-fahs”, “stosh-nog, stosh-lut-sip” and similar phrases followed me around for days after the show. And I love how expressive the Johns are during this song, it’s just this whole theatricality of it that makes it very funny and awesome.

My favourite moment was when, in spirit of, well, all of this being performed in reverse, Marty also did the counting down to the start of the song with his drumsticks, but at the end. I read later that Linnell also used to sometimes instruct the audience to applaud before they start playing the song and damn, I wish he still did that because that's just hilarious.

And could this really be… the last song of the first set already - Brontosaurus. One thing about this song is that I used to not care about it much, until I saw a recording of their first live performance of it all the way back sometime around the end of 2022 / beginning of 2023, when I just about cried from the wonder of it all. This song is just a whole new thing live, in huge part thanks to the horns of course. Cathartic maybe is the right word for it. One of those songs that I could be pretty much 100% sure I would hear on this day but even despite that, when it actually came to it… Very very beautiful moment. Maybe this is when I almost cried again actually? Well, there were many contenders.

Set 2

So as you just read here, there was an abundance of stuff in the first set already that had me all like “this is the BEST!!!”, yet… We had this little moment of doubt with my friend, because: a) they were hoping to still hear at least a couple of songs that they didn’t already hear the previous night, b) I, having “analyzed” the setlists from this leg of the tour so far, in order to assess how likely I’d be to hear some of my favs, and if there’s any logic to how they change from night to night, decided that there’s two main setlist that the band alternates between. But based on the first half of the show so far it seemed to me like this was going to be a very similar set of songs to last night’s, and out of those two variants, the one I was hoping for less than the other… It was mostly them playing Darlings today once again that made me think this.

And all in all in my head it was like, well, I’ll probably get either the show with Darlings & Lie Still, Little Bottle (+the STICK!!!) OR the show with lots of miscellaneous songs that were very high on my wishlist. So, in either case I’d be happy, but maybe a bit more happy if we got the second option here…

Anyway. What I’m saying is that, keeping all of the above in mind, and how my expectations for the second set were shaped by that… I really can’t overstate how much of an UNREAL NO WAY YOU GOTTA BE JOKING THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT??? time it turned out to be.

So let’s get right into why. And boy, there’s a lot. In a way this is when this show REALLY started for me, not that what was earlier wasn’t incredibly fun and amazing already but. This was just a whole different league. It’s like, I could say that earlier I felt at moments like I’m sometimes transported into some alternate dimension, and from here on it was all just, being transported into that joyous alternate dimension for the whole duration of the show. The TMBG dimension. I’ll get back to this, but being here was really just something like, a different type of existence, so different from the often bleak daily life that I’ve been way too familiar with until then.

One thing that sort of added once again to this whole “it’s all perfectly falling into place” feeling, even before the show started up again, was how I tried to pay attention to the intermission music again, and remembered from my days of watching many live show recordings in late 2022 how someone pointed out that when this one specific song plays, you can tell that the show will start in just a moment. And yeah, they were right. Girl Don’t Come started playing so I knew…

And so the second set started with the reversed recording of the Stellub performance of course (how many times have they performed it by that point? Over a hundred? But yeah, it was scarily accurate, as always), and the alternate version of Hearing Aid with this whole little animation thing, which was also a lot of fun to watch actually.

And so the band was back for the second round… with Memo To Human Resources! So I’d known for a while that this song has been a pretty oft played one recently, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen any recordings of it live? And to be honest my memory of this song is really blurry, so it’s still kind of an enigmatic moment to me now, all in all I’m sure though that it must have hit the same way Moonbeam Rays or Brontosaurus did, and that might explain this whole effect it presumably had on me, heh.

And now, ok. Man, It’s So Loud In Here will never ever feel the same way to me again. Because actually nothing could have prepared me for how amazing it was live. And I didn’t even particularly anticipate this one, but when we got to it… I knew already that it was going to be a blast.

I remember thinking that this is one of those moments that you simply can’t capture in any way, you’re just fully here in the moment and you live it there and remember it forever. I was also thinking about the meaning of the song, about this classic TMBG fashion of singing this song in this huge room full of people, a song about how it’s so loud in here. And I was wondering if that’d be another of those little confusing moments for people unfamiliar with TMBG because yes, I suppose it’s pretty silly… On top of being an incredible and actually moving experience. I’m shedding a tear just thinking about it all now.

So now, more Flood time! Minimum Wage, a song that, per Linnell’s words, they’ve been playing “for 40 years”...

JL: …And we just got to the point where we all end at exactly the same time. We had so much integrity for so long… And now we’re just sleek… robots up here.

JF: Yeah, that AI showbusiness stuff. Nobody likes it - you gotta do it, you know. It’s the way people DO IT!

JL: I’ve got six fingers…. (JL demonstrates how he has six fingers, apparently)

JF: Yeah, yeah… (with emphasis) *AI*.

(long pause prompting audience laughter)

JF: It makes its own punchline!

But um, what was next on the agenda (John)? More songs from the Flood album, oh yes! Let’s give the people some more of what they want!

JL: That feisty… that album by that bunch of maverick… young… rulebreakin’... (pause) But those days are gone.

JF: Well, the one thing that remains is the barricade putting eight feet between us and the front row. That’s the important thing. The distance.

JL: And you know, it’s not for *our* protection, it’s for *yours*.

Alright, so here’s another song. Here’s another song from Flood. And that song is We Want A Rock. What I remember the most about this one is, once again, the beauty of being able to sing these “ridiculous lyrics” when everyone else is doing the same thing, when we’re all singing about how everyone wants a rock to wind a string around and about how everyone wants prosthetic foreheads on their real heads but someone in this town is trying to burn the foreheads down. At some point I just couldn't help having a little laugh over the joy of it all. And also, *boom boom boom* “ooooOOOOOOH!!” *boom boom boom* “oooooOOOOOOH!!”

Then it was Marty time, starting with the drum intro and the BUZZER, for it’s time for Hot Cha! Which becomes even more of a blast with the HORNS of course, and at the very end, can you believe it, I forgot that they change the last line of the song to “please come home” live, so I was slightly taken aback by that. Yes, that’s important to mention here, somehow.

Flansburgh introduced the next song as a song from the Lincoln album and for some goddamned reason the only song I could think of at the moment that fit that criteria was Shoehorn With Teeth.

It was not Shoehorn With Teeth. It was the song that came back to live rotation earlier in 2024 during the spring US tour, but seemed to fall from it afterwards once again, which was a shame, because it’s like, probably my favourite TMBG song to be honest and its newest live rendition was absolutely breathtakingly amazing from what I’ve seen from recordings online. I’m not sure if I was aware by that point of how it miraculously returned as an encore at the show of the night before…

But still, this was like the biggest “this can’t be real actual and happening right now” moment of the night, and maybe. of my. entire life?? And it of course took me a couple of seconds to recognise the song STILL, besides the instant punch of that *feeling* that happened the second the song started. Yeah, Where Your Eyes Don’t Go, played live at my show just like I dreamed about, no big deal, everyday stuff, haha.

The song really IS freaking amazing live though. Where would we be without THE HORNS!!! And honestly I could say a bit more about this “fav song” situation, because not only is it of course among my most beloved ever songs at this moment and has been for over two years, I also remember distinctly that it was the FIRST TMBG song that I loved and couldn’t get enough of and replayed over and over, and it’s a big reason behind why I became a fan in the first place. So, the extra beauty of the significance of it all, it just blows my mind completely.

So, Lucky Ball And Chain was a short little break for collecting myself again, because obviously we were far from done with all the biggest wonders of the night still. And I’m not saying that the song wasn’t a good time, it of course was just like everything else here, so it’s safe to just assume that without me specifying each time. Lol.

But, as I said, the break was short. I would have put seeing Spy live somewhere at the top of my general life goals / bucket list thing, if I had one, that is. I had been very vocal about wanting to see THAT song in particular in discussions with my friend, so the excited glance we exchanged the moment this song started was absolutely priceless and a thing of pure wonder.

Anyway, we all know Spy. We all know that it’s one of the most often played live songs of theirs, and that the reason behind its live durability is the several minutes long improvised jam band section at the end. And I might be one of those maybe rare kinds of people who wouldn’t mind hearing it a hundred times more. It IS improvised after all, so… different each time, ha! It was also very vital to me that I get to take part in the audience participation segment of it… and this is also what was granted to me on this magical evening by whatever godlike forces exist above.

So yeah, this was yet another among the top 5 show moments of course… The biggest highlights here were when Linnell did this sort of old-timey speech (“THIS! Is the *sound* of the thirties. The sound of the SWING ERA!”) that’s probably a reference to something that I’m completely unfamiliar with so that only makes it funnier, and the whole audience conducting part from Flansburgh at the end, because man, he was having a total BLAST with this, it was such a joy to see. And we were all also having a great time, by doing our part and screaming as if we’re in hell. All I’m trying to say here is. I love hellish noise, I love cacophony. This is my perfect kind of show experience, I won’t be hearing any arguments about this.

Ok, so what was the next thing that the Johns prepared with the intent of dealing the biggest emotional damage imaginable to us? Well, remember how Last Wave had never been played live until earlier this year and then they never played it again. Guess what happened now. Well, that’s yet another of the huge and one of the earliest personal favourites of mine returning onto the setlist on the previous evening actually.

This song is. Augh. I just love how it has this sort of elegant, but emotional sound that kind of sets it apart. It’s a completely singular song to me in every sense and I always wondered why they never played it live, but now I’m just glad they finally started playing it. Gotta love yet another AMAZING trumpet solo from Jordan Katz and the Johns’ overdramatized delivery of the lyrics, it’s so much fun. And this song also provided us with some more epic Marty moments, especially the solo and the ending, both just like on the studio recording technically… So maybe that’s why they were so great to see recreated in real time too?

JF: I think we were all a little stunned by the majesty of the ending of that song.

Two days before the show I went to the Natural History Museum here in London, and that's actually very relevant here because when I saw the exhibit that was entitled “Mammals” in that museum, that was when the SONG Mammal started following me around in my mind, for like, most of the remaining time of that day. And I had the amazing realization that oh, it’s not impossible that I could hear this song this next Sunday, played live, so awesome!!

So yeah of course, they played Mammal next. And honestly I’m not even that attached to this song, I do still love it though and it’s one of those situations where I see myself become excited over songs that I feel like are big fan favourites and something that other people are probably very happy about hearing, heh. But maybe even more important yet is that this meant APOLLO 18 representation!! So special to me.

Now I’ll just say that it’s worth it avoiding spoilers sometimes. Like, show spoilers, because I guess I didn’t actually watch that much recent footage and so I had no idea about what other awesome fun stuff was just about to happen.

JF: Folks, folks… we’ve been informed by the people who work here that every single person in the audience tonight is carrying a silly little phone with them. And we'd like to take full advantage of that right now…

We were instructed by Flansburgh to get our phones and open our camera and set it to selfie mode! And then Turn Around, Turn Around, (there’s a thing there that can be found)…

JF: We can see you now and I can tell that nobody is doing what I’m talking about.

You know, so this is when you get to live that wonder of actually BEING THERE once more. And enjoy the way that specifically TMBG shows are, because I’ll be real, I can’t think of any other concert where I could see something like this happening.

JF: Everybody, spin around for just a little bit, get a selfie and we’re gonna photobomb your selfie.

JL: Which we tried to do last night and nobody was getting it!

JF (interrupting): That’s not true! On social media you’re gonna see some very good evidence that some people got together over the course of the twenty minutes we dedicated to this portion of the show.

So yeah, now I can even keep on living my life knowing that I technically have a photo with my favourite musicians in the world. Definitely not something I expected to gain after this day.

JF: We’re gonna take a lot of time doing this. This is possibly the least important thing we’ll be working on…

So that was awesome!!! BUT WAIT THERE WAS MORE!!!!!!

JF: Ok folks, this the second part of the test: see if you can find the flashlight portion of your phone - the more traditional rock portion.

That “more traditional rock portion” part must have been lost on me then, because this was still a singular moment to me (I haven’t been to many live shows before this anyway), and I could only really think of one other thing that this immediately reminded me of. I like yearning for all sorts of things, including those that are in the past now and that I never even could have had a real chance of participating in. Such as the Hollywood Bowl show in 2023, where TMBG opened for Sparks, and during the Sparks show and the song All That everyone in the audience took out their phones and there was this whole sea of lights, people swaying with their phone torches to that song. So, yes, I was NOT expecting either that I’d get to experience THIS as well. After all.

At first I wasn’t even aware that all the stage lights had been turned off for the next song, because with all those torches facing the stage it was so bright in here!! And the song that got this special treatment was Dead - very fitting I must say. The large procession waved their torches AND sang, and I can hear it on the recording of this song especially that the audience was really into the singing part. Loud and beautiful and touching to be there.

And then it was time to thank the band, since the end of the show was actually drawing closer and closer, as absurd as it may have seemed to think about… (not that there was really time to stop and think about that anyway). And I think the Johns did some sort of jab at Elektra Entertainment here, but I unfortunately couldn’t catch what they were saying, rip. Anyway, it must have been very funny I’m sure.

So what songs could possibly still be left and ahead of us now? Two more songs from Flood, here we go.

Why is the world in love again? Because it's time to be marching hand in hand and singing Theme From Flood! And once again being reminded of how WE'RE ALL HERE TOGETHER. All in all, the moment of this song, and it going right into Birdhouse In Your Soul, yes, that was just as ethereal and unreal as I imagined it would be. Even now, as I'm thinking back to it, I start to feel overwhelmed with the excitement, how I was just sort of going “YES YES YES!!!” in my head, after the “I'm your only friend” bit, when it gets kind of quiet for a second and it starts up again we're all jumping and cheering. I could only try to picture an approximation of this scene in my mind months earlier, so thinking about how this actually happened is still absolutely surreal to me. There's just nothing else like Birdhouse.

…

Damn it, I still have a bit more of the show to write about, it’s not the time for tears, brother.

I didn’t want the song to end and it almost seemed like the band didn’t either, because Linnell kept singing the “soul” at the end for several more seconds and also making it goofier still.

Encores time

End of show? No, two encores now. The encore waiting and clapping time until the band comes back on stage felt much much shorter than it always did when I watched recordings of shows. Shouldn't be surprising but everything here felt like it took 10% of the time it actually lasted.

So it was time for the most wondrous thing, a John and John only performance as a duo! This wasn't a total surprise to me, because I knew they switched up the way they play this particular song once again, on some nights at least, but I couldn't be sure that I'd be blessed enough to witness it myself too… And here it was, about to happen!!!

People were screaming Istanbul a lot. I could’ve been easily more annoyed by that, but you know what, I think this is necessary too. How could this be a REAL concert experience without a bunch of presumably drunk people shouting out the titles of songs and being annoying. Maybe if one of those people was standing close to us I'd be talking differently, but… It's part of the charm, sorry.

It was in fact Istanbul (Not Constantinople) time. I’ll be honest, if it weren’t for the duo format I would have not cared for this song any more than I did for Particle Man. But it turned out to be one of my favourite things on this show, yeah, this evening subverted so many expectations in every sense, alright.

You could argue about the significance of the duo format here because OMG, it’s just like in the old days!!!! The good old days or whatever. But no, it’s also just… I don’t know. Even to me, who obviously hasn’t known TMBG for that long, it was another of those kind of touching moments. And what made it all even better was when soon after this show, I happened to watch a video of a Flood show… from 1990. Like wow, this really is kind of just like the 1990 duo days. EXCEPT it’s much cooler now actually.

I didn’t record this song but definitely would have if our view for it was better. Well, thankfully someone else took care of that anyway. And I think that instead of me trying to describe it here, everyone should just do themselves a favour and watch it. I can't get over how beautifully unserious and funny this performance was, watching that must have been the most fun I've had in a looooong time. Again, top 5 moments of the night, maybe top 3 even.

Now, what were the funniest bits. “Peoplejustpeoplejustpeoplejust…” and the Get In The Car bit. And the “yeeeeeees”. And the “noooooo”. And the “istanbuuuuuuul…. ouuuuu…. oouuuuuu…”. You get it, right.

Can’t Keep Johnny Down was the second song of the encore and this performance is the only reason why this song suddenly became like, a literal favorite. The power of live shows! Now whenever I hear it I'm just like. OOOOOH Johnny. Save me Johnny, save me.

Linnell told us “thanks so much, you guys are great!” before they all left the stage :) And of course there was still one more song that I had to hear today. So after more clapping and cheering they were back on stage again.

JL: Yes! Thanks a million. No! Two million! (in a bit of a jokey voice) …I’ve never thanked that much before.

And you know what, I choose to believe that he meant it.

The last song of the night was Doctor Worm. I don’t know what else I can say about this song now, just that upon relistening to this whole show again I’m realizing that I could just. call this song kind of a perfect live song. Maybe I associate it with live shows more than anything else since it's not featured on any studio album and I've definitely heard it wayyyy more times in the form of live recordings than the studio version. And also maybe I lied that Synopsis haunted me the most after the show, Doctor Worm must have been even more insistent in that sense, and I had no issue with that honestly.

And so, with the last one “They call me Dooctooor WOOOOOORM!!” and a finishing BWAAAAA from the horns, the show was over.

After the show

Don’t worry, there’s much less to talk about now in terms of the after show stuff compared to before the show. Just this one important thing that, yet again, as if this wasn’t ENOUGH ALREADY…!!! We had to hang out by the stage for a bit longer still, because there’s a chance of ending up with a SETLIST. Or a drumstick. But I guess the setlist was more important.

And Marty walked over to us. And handed us the setlist. I mean, it was my friend who grabbed the setlist, but to me that was just like we all were chosen, it really didn't matter to me who actually had it. So it was a win! I really couldn’t ask for anything else by that point. I got it all.

Then we had to wait for a bit by the merch stand because lots of folks gathered there and thankfully, there was still lots of stuff to choose from! I would have loved to go a bit more crazy with this maybe, but since I still had to keep in mind having to travel back with all this stuff, flying, customs and all that… I settled for a tour shirt, because yeah, a shirt with the dates of the tour I ATTENDED printed on it? I needed that, that would do as the only physical souvenir even, no need for anything more (well, I actually did get a bit more, because the very next day I went by a random record store here in Camden Town in hopes of finding THE album somewhere in London still. and guess what I found….., but that’s a whole different story so let me just limit myself to only the day of the show in this post). The shirt is a total slay by the way, I love the burgundy color.

After we left the venue we still managed to bump into more folks going back from the concert. And like 3 different people in total who asked us about the setlist and where we arrived from, said that woooow, you deserve to have it then. Thank you people for also appreciating all the hard work that went into this.

My brother & I had a very short way back to our hotel now, so in the end it really felt like we just returned from a quick little fun event just down the street. Even though we travelled pretty far to get here, you know. So it didn't even feel like some huge endeavour or anything all that unusual, and I mean that in the best way possible.

So my day ended with my head full of thoughts and images and fragments of songs looped ad nauseam. And also with an aching back and no energy left in me to stand for even one more minute. The tiredness was very real but I must say that tired-happy might be one of the best emotions / states one could have to deal with. I hope I can do all of this again someday, because I’m actually so serious that I wouldn’t mind going to a TMBG show every other evening if I could. That’s the dream actually.

Miscellaneous T(houghts) time

Ok, I swear I’m almost done. Just a couple general / finishing observations about the show as a whole now.

● First of all, I want to come back for a bit to that TMBG dimension thing. Because this whole thing really was sort of like entering some sort of different mode of existing. The Johns are very funny guys and the whole band’s energy is extremely infectious, but I also think it’s a very special thing how their stage presence creates this whole atmosphere that’s just completely laid-back and fun in the purest form of fun. Even when there’s a big crowd and we’re in an “important” venue. Because you sort of really feel at home, like you’re exactly where you belong. And earlier I could imagine it being more like, oh the stakes are so high, because this is THE EVENT, finally. And in reality this was the most relaxed I’ve felt in a very long time. And I was almost painfully aware of how I was watching it all with sparkly eyes, hoping that it’s maybe not too obvious because waaaah, embarrassing, it’s not like I’m having the best time ever right now or anything, please.

● However, all of the above definitely had a lot to do with how the audience was at the show, and I was just really surprised by how very awesome the audience's energy was. Like I could imagine it being maybe less enthusiastic after all because uh well, maybe a lot of people actually could be here more for Flood and Birdhouse and all that rather than the actual band… Shouldn’t have underestimated this fanbase, because the audience was so responsive to everything and just made it feel even more like the explosion of joy it really was. And I really felt like I was with *my* people, and, especially when it’s a huge group like this.. that’s very rare and special to me.

● I’ve discovered that in TMBG dimension time isn’t real because I swear, when the first set was coming to a close, I felt like maybe only 20 minutes passed and we’ve only heard maybe 6 songs so far, instead of the actual. 17 songs. 17?? damn, that's a lot of songs. I actually haven’t counted them until now. And it was 33 songs in total, 36 if you add the intros and reversed Stellub, huh!

● You people weren’t lying about the Linnell stare. Actually, related to this, another worry I sort of had before this was that should I end up close to the stage, I might feel too awkward about being possibly perceived by the band in any way to truly enjoy myself. But that actually wasn’t the case at all, not counting like a couple of moments only where I’d make maybe-imaginary, maybe-real eye contact with someone from the band and have to look way fast because noooo, don’t perceive me actually, lol.

● And again, you people weren’t lying either that these guys have unbelievable amounts of energy that make you feel like an old man who can barely stand for a couple hours in comparison. This is coming from a 23-year-old, maybe not the most athletic person in the world, but still. Also, Marty really is the guy of all time, loved watching his antics. And one more special shoutout to the Tricerachops Horns, because yes, these songs I’ve loved for a while already CAN get even better and simply epic and beautiful.

All in all, best show ever! Honestly, I don’t know if any other show could possibly top this. I would be very happy to be proven wrong of course, especially if that were to happen because of another TMBG show. Thank you Johns and everyone else for this evening, it was a dream come true and I’ll never forget how out of this world and amazing it was!!

[away-ward]

Nah fr like idk if I’m remembering this right but aydin barely knew Alex no? Like sir what is this stupid revenge plan of yours lol. Like if you want revenge so bad and you are bored take it on those weird parents of yours . And the way he was calling her “the artist “ and when he said “ she’s a fucking Viking “ I couldn’t stop laughing lmaoo so cringe .

Man, I couldn't agree more!

Anyone can correct me, but as far as I can remember, the story goes:

As a college freshman, Alex and her roommate got along great. Best Friends. So much so, that when the roommate was on a video call with her boyfriend, Aydin, she and Alex started touching each other while he was watching.

Aydin was so taken by Alex that he wouldn't let it go, and eventually the roommate got jealous, took it out on Alex, started rumors about her that ruined her reputation with friends and she somehow lost her scholarship.

Alex transferred to Trinity College and started escorting so that she wouldn't have student debt. Meanwhile, Aydin was trying to stay away from her (at this point, they have never met in person? I think?), and be the good son his father wanted. His father arranged a marriage for him, but he couldn't go through with it. He only wanted Alex. But by the time he was ready to go to her, she'd already saved herself and didn't want him. But she really did. But she wasn't ready to forgive him for abandoning her when his girlfriend was sabotaging her entire life..?

Oh, and he wanted her to stop escorting because that was gross - letting other men touch her (did he forget where he met her? Or was that okay because it was his girlfriend and for his pleasure?). And Alex refused because she wasn't going to let anyone else pay for her way, or let a man tell her what she was going to do (even though her plan was to eventually stop escorting anyway.) She was an fully independent woman who didn't need anyone's help.

I think?

I don't understand their relationship at all. They'd never even met in person before they decided that was the person for them. I mean, even Kai and Banks spent more time together before they got married, and their timeline is insanely short. The whole thing echoes the same idea that was started in Corrupt, which is that Alex has some sort of magnetism that draws people to her, and even though her attitude is in your face all the time, it's impossible to hate her because she's just so warm and delightful. Give me a break; she can't be this perfect.

Aydin planning this whole thing because Alex didn't want him even though he'd never really spent time with her screams pathetic to me. Sir, kindergarteners act more mature than this. And the fact that he was right and Alex wanted him all along, therefore making everything that happened in Nightfall seem worth it. Noooo.

He could have ruined Emory's life, but oh, it's okay because he was so in love with Alex and that's understandable🤩

And don't even get me started on the three pages of Emory just sitting there narrating while horsemen go all out defending Alex, demanding a large wedding and whatever else, for their darling. Meanwhile, she's in the room giggling about how cute he is. Gag. My patience for Alex had long expired by that point, but that was the final nail in the coffin. We just didn't need it, when there was so much between Will and Emory left untouched.

I mean, I'm more relaxed about Alex than most around here, but I really have no patience for Aydin. However, I've said before, that I think his story arc would have been helped if he'd been at least in his thirties during his time in Blackchurch. Not that I would've liked him - just that it would have made more sense. He still sucks either way.

[kirasworldofwords]

I don't think I ever really introduced myself here so here goes!

First of all, hi! My name is Kira, but you may call me Kiki if you'd like. On AO3, I'm known as "chiquita_chequito", I'm often there just lingering and reading or writing, lol. I'm 22 years old, German with Polish roots and live in a small German town where nothing ever really happens, lol. I have many interests, like certain anime and F1 (especially that as of late) and consider myself a decent writer at least. You're free to quote and/or correct me on that though, lol.

A few random facts about me:

✨️ I'm neurodivergent! I have OCD, ADD and Autism paired with hyperesthesia and ARFID (I know, I know... I should pick a struggle, but alas).

✨️ I also happen to be queer - bisexual as well as somewhere on the aro-ace gradient plus bigender, to be exact. My pronouns are they/she, meaning I prefer "they/them" but am also okay with "she/her". Anything but "he/him" and "it/its".

✨️ My hyperfixation has been cars (as in the vehicles, not the movie) ever since I was a baby. After my first two words, "Mama" and "No", my third word was "Car" in German - the fourth was "Skodda", as per my mom's telling. Surprise surprise, I still love Škodas. 😂

✨️ I play in a sort of marching band that we call Schalmeienzug, there's no direct translation though. It's really fun! Been there for five years now and still love it. 🫶🏻

✨️ Don't ask me how or why but for whatever reason, I can get any song I want stuck in someone else's brain. It works every damn time with just about anyone and yes, I am quite shameless about it. If I have to suffer through having Spongebob music stuck in my brain, then so do you. I have spoken.

✨️ My sense of humor is... skewed at best, fucking dark at worst. That's it. I refuse to elaborate.

✨️ In my free time, I also study Finnish. Thanks, Käärijä, lmao.

✨️ And yes, I love Eurovision. As a queer European girlie, that's a must, lol.

✨️ Regarding F1, my favorite drivers of the current grid are Oscar Piastri, Daniel Ricciardo (noooo, I don't have a thing for Aussies, wdym [also RIP, I am not okay, even if he's not a driver anymore, I will always love him]), Nico Hülkenberg and Sergio "Checo" Pérez (Christian Horner, when I catch you). Of the old grid I still somewhat remember (I've been watching F1 since childhood days), my favorites used to be Sebastian Vettel, Kimi Räikkönen and the Nicobergs - aka Nico Rosberg and Nico Hülkenberg. My heart has a special place reserved for Michael Schumacher, though, and it's shaped specifically like his stature. ❤️

✨️ I swear a lot. Like, a lot. I'm not kidding. So... proceed with caution if you're sensitive to that.

✨️ My free time is mainly spent playing video games - I don't have many friends and those I do have don't always have time for me so this is what I revert back to if I don't have somewhere else to be like a performance, lol.

✨️ I drive a black four cylinder Opel Corsa D ecoflex from 2013 and it is my pride and joy. 🫶🏻 Already jokingly told my mom that, if she wants grandkids, she already has one. My car. 😭

✨️ Last but not least, my writing style is quite distinct in the way that I usually write melancholic, if not downright depressing stuff. I guess it's a reflection of my life thus far - again, I will not elaborate.

That should be it from my side for now. If anything else comes into my messy little pea-sized brain, I shall let you know through editing this post - or just completely rewriting it, lmao.

Which means, for now, have a nice one and don't let the bedbugs bite!

- 🍸

[honey-beann]

I'm so in love with ur Ruiner, Ruination fic omg ヽ(o´3`o)ﾉ i love how you actually put a case inside so it felt like i was solving the case with him... love when i have to actually use my brain sometimes. And gwyneth girly noooo.. rlly love how the way she asked reader abt connor before the thing happened :-(. sorry if this sounds like a Canvas discussion post I just rlly rlly love ur fic hahaha.

Also love the aesthetic posts u reblogged :3

Omg thank you so much for all of your kind words, and no worries about this sounding like a canvas discussion post lol, it totally doesn't!

Also, I'm super glad to hear you enjoyed the case-based chapters of the series so far! I definitely spent a decent chunk of time planning that whole thing out (I'm more of an illogical thinker than I am a logical/sensical one, so trust me, my brain was in sport mode trying to think up an interesting case that would make sense lmao) , so it makes me really happy to hear that it felt like the two of you were actually solving the case together like I intended :)

I also am super surprised at how many people liked the little detail about Gwyneth mentioning Connor! I was worried it would come across as a random, so it really makes me happy to know that I was able to properly convey the idea that he was a hero to her the same way that human revolutionists are heroes to those they help revolutionize!

And thank you for appreciating the aesthetic reblogs :) I try to collect the things that inspire me and have them in queue so people can see some of the ideas, factors, and imagery that may drive the stories I write forward in the future! I thought it would be a cool way to show people what might be coming up fic wise without writing out a bunch of posts about ideas, excerpts, etc.

Anyways, this is a long ass response, so I'm sorry for the word vomit, but I really appreciate you taking the time to let me know all of your thoughts! It really made my day when I read all of your kind words, and I just wanted to acknowledge how amazing it is when writers get feedback like this.

People like you are what keep us writers writing even when we don't get a ton of engagement, so thank you for helping keep the inspiration and drive alive! <3

[mt07131]

I mixed up my ask games and @grapecaseschoices meant this one for all my girlies so let's try this again Properly

Is your Tav Baldurian? If yes, did they grow up in Baldur’s Gate? If no, where are they from?

Xuna: She is now. She grew up in Menzoberranzan, but she has not been back in years and frankly never plans to so as far as she cares, she’s Baldurian now. Solanine: She is. Baldur’s Gate is the heart of the temple of Bhaal so even if she doesn’t remember it, she is. Ardanthe: She considers herself Baldurian. Her enclave was just outside of the city but she spent a decent amount of time in the city growing up. Artemisia: Born and bred baby. The streets of Baldur’s Gate are as familiar to her as the back of her own hand. Lethe: Similar to Solanine, she is, even if she doesn’t necessarily recall it.

4. Is your Tav close with whoever raised them? Xuna: HA. No, absolutely not. Also “raised” is a strong word for what Xuna’s mother did, “tolerated” would be a better fit. Solanine: No. She also doesn’t remember them and uhhhh killed them in baby’s first murder spree so it’s no skin off her back. Ardanthe: Yes, absolutely. Her parents were her first support system and continue to be so, and the same goes for the rest of her enclave. Artemisia: She wasn’t necessarily close with her parents when they were alive, but they’re dead now. Lethe: She was, it was the first taste of what being in a family was like. Now they’re all just phantoms to her mind and old bloodstains on her hands.

5. Is your Tav religious? Were they raised that way? Xuna: Noooo no no no absolutely not. She sees no sense in worshipping any gods when they (supposedly) deemed her cursed right out of the womb. She was raised to worship Lolth but uh, she did not agree or comply. Solanine: Technically, yes. Everything she does is to please daddy dearest and he’s a god so yeah. Ardanthe: Not particularly. She doesn’t worship any gods in specific, if she were to worship anything it would be nature as a force rather than One Specific Deity. Artemisia: Nah, she couldn’t care less about the gods. Doubly so once she and Gale start smooching. Lethe: She never saw herself as particularly religious, and after finding out who is she, she wants nothing to do with anything divine if she can help it.

11. Did your Tav know or know of any of the other characters? Xuna: Nope, they were all strangers to her. Solanine: Obviously she knew the Chosen (close to Gortash in particular wink wink), and I like to think she knew of Karlach in passing because of her connection to Gortash but other than that, no. Ardanthe: She definitely knew of Halsin and Jaheria by reputation, druid to druids y’know. I think she would also know of Wyll, but nothing substantial enough to say she knew him. Artemisia: She had no idea who any of these people were. Lethe: As with Solanine, she knew the Chosen but beyond that she wouldn’t have heard of anyone else.

21. What kind of education did your Tav have? Xuna: The best that money could buy in Menzoberranzan. As long as it kept her quiet and out of sight. Solanine: Nothing formal, most of her education was in the art of killing once she was taken to the Bhaalists. Ardanthe: She learned mainly from just watching the other druids, eventually getting into leatherwork with an apprenticeship. Artemisia: She didn’t have the means for anything formal, everything was learned by doing on the streets. Lethe: She doesn’t recall, but her foster family did try to teach her the basics. Shame she ended up killing them in a bloodthirsty haze.

[televinita]

All The Songs Make Sense

I am regularly sad that Tumblr doesn't have access to this post, because it's one of my favorite things I wrote during my first go-round with Doctor Who/while processing my feelings about Journey's End, so I am transplanting it here. Which I've thought about doing at least twice before, but I don't think I actually ever did, so here goes nothing.

CONTEXT: I had my music library on shuffle, and 3 songs in a row were either explicitly written about the Doctor/Rose or on my ship playlist for them, and so I said...

Wait, wait, I HAVE A NEW GAME.  For the next 20 songs, I will magically relate lyrics to Doctor/Rose. I was this close to turning this game into the fic meme [where you write a tiny story related to/inspired by the song], but since I've never even tried to write Doctor Who fic, it would all pretty much come out sounding the same: me frustratingly working out my issues with Journey's End in terrible, thinly-veiled third person POV.  So instead we'll just pluck out lyrics and comment on them, as I do.

And so this was born, bringing into existence lyrical associations that, in some cases at least, persist to this day.

1. Blackbird - Evan Rachel Wood You were only waiting for this moment to arrive

(cue "Rose's Theme" and an otherwise-empty street)

OR

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

(broken wings, a phrase here meaning Ten II and/or her suddenly clipped joy)

2. I Will Show You Love - Kendall Payne

Well that's just too easy:

Watch your dreams like falling stars, heartache made you who you are

3. In This Life - Delta Goodrem I have faltered, I have stumbled, I have found my feet again I've been angry and I've been shaken, found a new place to begin I think that works pretty well for Rose in Pete's World

4. Do You Want to Play? - Jewel (A CHALLENGE, SIR?)

Don't ever give away what you can't take back

Which sort of implies that Rose is an object, but WHATEVER.  He essentially handed her off - gave her away - and now the next time the universes magically break down and they're reunited, it'll be too late.

5. Taxi Ride - Tori Amos (ohoho!  You think you're gonna throw me for a loop?) We've all been pushed too far today

Almost anywhere in the two parts of the finale, really.

6. Hard Candy - Counting Crows

All the regrets you can't forget Are somehow pressed upon a picture In the face of such an ordinary girl This is where I really wish I was doing the fic meme...not that I actually have an idea, but, you know.  I have a mental picture within the TARDIS. 

7. Larger Than Life - Backstreet Boys

All of our time spent in flashes of light

YOU THOUGHT I COULDN'T DO IT.  BUT I DID.

8. Awake - Josh Groban (oh, I see we're back to the easy ones) We can't stay like this forever But I have you here today

9. Dignity - Hilary Duff Curses!  The game has defeated me.  This round. (unless we go meta and relate it to my lack of dignity in posting this) [let alone re-posting it]

10. Emily - Jewel One moment here, then gone With no forwarding address

Hard to pass mail between parallel worlds.

11. Ooh Oh - Keri Noble (ooh, oh, challenge?) What if I want you just to walk away From all the pain we have both been through?

*tilts head*  I mean, isn't that what he asks in the end?  Essentially? 

12. What Child is This - Josh Groban *rolls eyes*  Way to make it impossible on the very next selection.  See, in the fic meme, I could have set something during one of the Christmas specials.  But noooo, I had to be lazy. 13. Wait for You - Elliot Yamin (Oh, hell yes.  Just watch me.) Rose -> Doctor You're still in love with me Don't leave me crying

Doctor 2 -> Rose Why can't we just start over again, get it back to the way it was? If you give me a chance, I can love you right 14. Goodnight and Go - Imogen Heap

We'll have drinks and talk about things Any excuse to stay awake with you

The chorus would work beautifully for Martha, but this is about as good as I can get for Doctor/Rose. Still, not terrible; better than nothing.

15. A New Day Has Come - Celine Dion Televinita forfeits this round on the grounds that the song mocks and taunts her and sinks her further into the pit of despair.

16. Telling Stories -- Tracy Chapman Sometimes a lie is the best thing

Lie, a noun illustrated in both the sentence "and I'm him," and Rose's kiss.

17. Stay - Beth Hart When I was young, just a little girl I'd sing to the sun & dream with the world Now I got a suitcase full of memories ...I don't know; is a slight stretch.  I again wish I was doing the fic meme.  Little Rose would be delightful.

18. Still Standing - The Rasmus Wish I could have you by my side Tonight when the sky is burning Think I am going to Turn Left places with this one...

19. What Goes Around Comes Around - Justin Timberlake (BWAHAHA!  And yet:) Don't want to think about it Don't want to talk about it I'm just so sick about it Can't believe it's ending this way Sorry, that's my reaction to Doctor Who.  Here's the Doctor/Rose bit:

Is this the way it's really going down? Is this how we say goodbye? See, it's slightly different!

20. Buildings - Regina (slightly edited for repetition) She would ask for time And she would beg for time And he would give her time But time is not given and time is not taken Which clearly sums it up. 

Also, haha, WAY TO SIGNAL THAT THE GAME IS OVER, LIBRARY ("Doomsday").

...my music library and I have a special relationship.  Be quiet. 

And finally, just because I really want to share what sparked the game off...

Goodbyes - Jess Anderson Is it so wrong to want to stay now that I've found you?

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 67

Metamorphosis/Daleks In Manhattan

“Metamorphosis”

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: I would legitimately never be in this situation, so sure

ooooooo now we get to find out all the things Sam’s been up to…and so does Dean…

This is only slightly more awkward and strained than the McElroys’ “don’t do a hit” PSA. Maybe both of these are signs to separate business and family

This show’s so fucking weird. They spent the first three seasons either ignoring the existence of a god or just flat out not believing in one, but now…NOW god does not want Sam to be doing what he’s doing

Whatever is happening to this man is really difficult to take while I’m eating lunch and having the sound pumped directly into my ears. It’s like bones cracking or even breaking. Eugh

I forgot Dean didn’t know Sam knew about the demon blood……it’s getting FAR more awkward than “don’t do a hit.”

Ew. Dude, is that RAW MEAT??? I hate watching this on my lunch. It’s always the WORST episodes…

They really use the most thinly veiled metaphors to parallel whatever conflict is going on between Sam and Dean, like, one sheet of saran wrap thin

I miss the days when they’d pull off to the side of the road to have nice little heart to hearts not yelling “I’VE GOT DEMON BLOOD IN ME, DEAN!!”

How long after hearing the phrase “long pig” did Dean start to come up with alternatives like “manburger helper”?

It’s not funny to have two men in their mid to late twenties carrying makeshift flame throwers break down your door, but hearing “we’re here to save you…I guess” and “we should leave” “yeah” almost immediately after kinda is. It’s only funny because the audience knows Sam and Dean

Aw, fuck. The other hunter’s gotten involved now…noooo, is this guy’s wife pregnant??? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck…

It’s the gross, wet sounds of this dude LITERALLY feasting on this hunter for me…can’t blame the wife for running away screaming after watching that

The boys showing up 15 minutes late with Starbucks…ooooo, a floor fit for a children’s hospital (how many times will this show give me the opportunity to use that joke??)

Well, that COULD have been a nice moment for Dean to reassure Sam if Jack hadn't attacked.

I’ll have to find it (maybe) but I once read a post about how Sam’s storyline in these first seasons especially tells a very queer coded story, and this episode really really hits you in the face with it. Like, yes, bi Dean and whatever…but there IS something to the heartache that Sam feels being othered to his own family by this thing he had no control over. This wasn’t his choice. It’s really resonant when Sam makes the decision to stop using his psychic powers because they made Dean uncomfy...Dean who has used "god doesn't want you doing this" but also only very recently started MAYBE believing there's a god? Sam think Dean believes he's a freak and less than human or at least other than human, sometimes saying that he's getting closer and closer to the things they hunt instead. I just...I see it.

“Been On My Mind…”: I think I’m gonna do a countdown…if in 10 episodes’ time I haven’t had a yes? I’m discontinuing this segment

"Daleks In Manhattan"

Lazlo should watch Supernatural. Then he wouldn't have gone investigating that weird noise and not gotten turned into a strange pig hybrid

I have a terrible feeling this is one of those two part episodes based solely on the fact that I'm struggling to say anything about this one. The Doctor and Martha are in 1930 NYC, and we're getting a lot of character introductions: the people and specifically the leader of Hooverville, the workers at the Empire State Building, the theater workers (performers and backstage), but nothing's really HAPPENING yet. Though, we're about to get our first glimpse of the Daleks, so that's something at least

There are so many times I'm glad I accidentally fucked up the scheduling and missed an episode of spn because having to hear the term "long pig" all during my lunch and now having these human/pig hybrids has mad that incredibly worth it, and there have been so many other small things that have lined up

Awww baby Andrew Garfield. He's precious, lookin' out for Martha

Somehow I think this foreman trying to get the Empire State Building built for the Daleks is gonna get either killed or turned into something at least close to a Dalek...either way, it's not what he thinks he's gonna get

Nooo, poor baby Andrew Garfield.

oh. that's equal parts terrifying and terrible...the guy who was getting "rewarded" by the Daleks just got...absorbed?? by one? And the CGI!!! Simply atrocious (affectionate)!!!

The showgirl did NOT sign up for all this...well, she's signing up for it NOW, I guess

I can't take this seriously...this is one of the weirdest story lines they've done and......the costuming...again, atrocious (affectionate) The guy who got combined with a Dalek? it looks so bad...

[moonsplit]

HIIIIIIIIIIIIII

i was wondering if i could request some fluffy or angsty toh hunter×gn!bard!reader headcannons.

that's the overall request, but if i can get a little specific, i would like if you'd include something about the reader being an actual half witch half human, maybe they get angry/sad because everyone uses the term half-a-witch as if it's something to be ashamed of being.

seeing hunter being so appreciative of willow in for the future made me get back into my hunter brainrot and honestly your fluffy hunter hcs were one of the only good hunter×reader work i could find here, i got SO SAD when i realized that was the only work you had published, so here i am, begging for more.

anyway, thx byeeeeee!

↠ "Half-a-witch, huh?" ↞

* pairing ↠ TOH - Hunter x gn!bard!reader * word count ↠ 881 * tags ↠ fluff, soft angst,

* notes ↠ This is the biggest compliment ever omg!! Thank you anon :D

You had a rough time growing up, hearing everyone use what you were as an insult

"Half-a-witch" this and "half-a-witch" that

It wasn't fun having everyone berate and doubt you for it either

People with better intentions would praise you for basic spells

Things you learned in grade school

Even if it did take you a bit longer to learn, they didn't have to treat you as if your existence was weird and wrong

Joining the bard track at Hexside was a choice you'd never regret, but some days people would get insufferable

As if using an instrument was "easier" than spell circles and didn't take even more training and practice just to get right

But noooo, the only thing easier than the bard track was potions, clearly

Meeting Hunter for the first time was certainly.. an experience

Why was this guy camping out at school?

The Boiling Isles was unique, sure, but as far as you knew there weren't many people living in the hidden areas of school

He stumbled over his introduction before running off, you chasing after him

Through a series of convoluted events, you got wrapped up in everything

It started with Hunter, you bringing him snacks and trying to pry any information from this weirdo you could

But, well, the whole school got covered in illusions

You managed to run into him and Gus, the three of you joining forces

Music was useful after all, while Gus could see through the illusion, you could use what was essentially echolocation

The panic attack he had.. wait-

He was the freaking golden guard??

Okay, okay, more important things to think about

But still, pretty important revelation that you're definitely gonna ask about later

And.. the day of unity? It was a sham?

You learned so much in the past day it was hard to digest

You went home, sulking into the familiarity of your bed

And the next day, or, next few days- leading up to the day, you joined the CATS, and their plans-

You were too deep, even if you didn't want to help, which you did, you also probably had a target on your back from being seen with Hunter

When the day came, you were shaken to your core

Everything was happening so fast, so many people to their knees-

Not to mention you were in the freaking human realm

You had been told by your mom that she managed to wander through a door, getting trapped in the demon realm

So you'd only ever heard stories of rain that was cold, the lack of magic..

You had always wanted to see it, your other parent had too- but the two of you only ever got stories from your mom

The victory of it was overshadowed by the fear

Everyone was badly injured, only one of you had been here before, and oh yeah, let's not forget to mention, you had no way of knowing what happened after you left!

It was high tensions for everyone

You spent the months growing close to the group, particularly Hunter

He was the first person you had made your friend, it was only natural you gravitated towards him

You ended up spilling your life's story to him, just a smidge

He listened as you told him about your parents, a brief complaint about "half-a-witch" sending him into a rant

"That insult is stupid, you have some of the most unique bard magic I've seen despite being half human! Luz beat me in a duel with her glyphs, and she's not even half witch, Willow's plant magic is seriously powerful, even-"

He cut himself off, faltering and putting his hands back in his lap. "Sorry."

He shook his head, when you tried to get him to keep going. Well, that was alright- baby steps, I guess.

"You think my technique is unique?"

"It's similar to old wild magic, your spell circles- were they plant or construction? They could both be useful with bard magic now that I think about it..." he trailed off, mumbling as he tried to work it out in his head.

"You saw those? I thought I was subtle! They were so tiny too,"

"It's my job to be observant, I'm the Golden Gua-"

It went silent

Hunter fiddled with his hands and shirt.

You put a hand over his own, causing him to flinch harder than you had seen someone flinch before and push your hand away

"It's okay, it takes time."

"How long is this going to go on? I can't take it."

Neither of you had an answer, of course.

Sure, you guys were safe- relatively, at least

But you couldn't stay in the human realm with no way back

And neither of you had gone through what Hunter was going through

You didn't even know the full extent of it

You spoke up after a few moments of pure silence, save for breathing

"I don't know, but I'll stay by your side. If you'll let me."

"I think I'd like that. Is that weird? That feels weird?"

"Nah, I think Luz made a bet on it though."

"A bet on what?"

You shrugged. "Who knows? It's Luz."

If you could capture the snicker that came from him for eternity, you would.

[plounce]

continuing to play stormblood. i have really enjoyed running around the azim steppe and doing all the people’s errands, chatting with them and learning about them, meeting the lesbian, and im also really in love with traditional mongolian fashion now. however. um. im sure other people have spoken about this. but it really is shocking how much this is basically a racist fantasy novel trope. hien is the Chosen Prince who goes to another country, adopts himself into a Downtrodden And Meek Clan, and then leads that clan to victory against the Violent Mean Clans so he can take control of their warriors by right of THEIR traditions and take them to his homeland to further his own political ends. AND YOU HAVE TO HELP HIM DO THIS! right after the naadam when the game has you /victorypose to the mol warriors and they all go YAAAAAAAY YOURE OUR KHATUN!!! WE LOVE YOU!!!! i was just like. AUUUUUGH NOOOO. I DON’T WANT THIS

there are so many other ways to do this... even little tiny tweaks so it isn’t so outrageous. you could convince each clan using diplomacy or diplomatic duels to lend their aid to the anti-imperial cause! you could aid the mol and guard cirina as she claims the ovoo! hell, this isn’t perfect, but what if hien had spent most of his life living on the steppe instead of like... six months?

that last one ties back to one of my other major discomforts with stormblood: lyse. there’s the biggest glaringest obviousest problem of her being the only white/blonde/blue-eyed ala mhigan, but also the fact that she’s our npc viewpoint on the ala mhigan struggle... but she has very few concrete connections to ala mhigo and has never actually lived there (if i’m remembering right - yda took her to live in sharlayan at age 5?). and a lot of the time, she’s our audience surrogate for getting Explained colonial oppression by somebody else in a resistance group after she blusters about “i don’t get it!! why don’t they fight back!!!” . i’m not going to go into the politics of diaspora and liberation struggles because that is something that is 1. far out of my lane 2. very very subjective especially wrt Real Life and not Fantasy Allegory. but it’s just an deeply weird and bad-optics character (very White Savior optics) and storyline. i’m sure other people have written much more coherently and in-depth-ly about the problems with lyse, so i won’t go too much into it here.

lyse and hien are two foils to each other within the text - the Chosen One who must Return To Lead the Liberation of Their Oppressed Homeland after spending time in other nations doing other work. and what’s really strange is that their character backstories would work better if they were switched. hien as the young man who spent most of his life as a warrior of the steppe; he literally says he doesn’t remember a free doma, because he was literally a fetus when doma was conquered - what if he only has memories from childhood of doma? he lived there when he was a small child, and thus still has an emotional investment in doma, but he also has a place on the azim steppe. and lyse as a recent refugee from ala mhigo - her sister rescuing her from some kind of major peril and bringing her to sharlayan or eorzea, leading to her involvement with the scions. the ala mhigan resistance seems much more active and current at the start of stormblood than the doman liberation front: it makes sense to have a character who just came from there be paired with it, and for the relatively more quelled DLF to be trying to bring in their long-lost prince as a last-ditch effort to rally the people before a figurehead after his father was killed in their last rebellion.

obviously any story that borrows so much allegorically from real political struggles is going to have some snarls and problems upon which to think critically. especially when that story is created by a team from a country that has been an imperial and colonial aggressor (as well as been subject to imperial powers itself).

it’s most keenly deeply uncomfortable (to put it lightly) when so much of xaela culture in FFXIV is borrowed from real mongolian cultures. the naadam is a real thing, but it’s not a Glorious Battle To See Who Rules The Steppe, it’s a traditional athletic/training festival. an ovoo is a real type of shrine/altar used in mongolian folk religion. the wikipedia page is right here. the azim steppe is not painted in a wholly negative light, and as always the sidequests give you a lot of sympathy and texture to the people in the area, but the borrowing from real mongolian culture is... well: imperial japan literally tried to seize mongolian religious relics when it was occupying china! this is not a clean slate that squeenix is working on.

stormblood gives you a lot to think about, and a lot of it isn’t good. it’s a story about resisting imperialism and how to go about doing that, which is bound to get people thinking and arguing. ffxiv is certainly a more politically incisive story about imperialism than star wars and many other pieces of genre fiction, but it’s also far from the most leftist story in the world. there are other problems within the game’s politics as of stormblood: most glaringly, the “beast tribes” (i am looking forward to that improving as ive heard it does in later expansions).

i’m obviously far from the best person to talk about this subject (white american), which is why i’m giving a stream-of-consciousness mini-essay on my personal tumblr blog, rather than publishing a book/article or otherwise getting paid to speak on this, or inserting myself where i shouldn’t be. but i do think that it’s not a bad thing for anyone playing ffxiv to think about stuff like this, so i am putting on my critical thinking cap and posting about it. as one does on their personal blog.

UPDATING EDIT SECTION: went out googling for more informed takes on this and here’s an article that talks about the problems with the azim steppe storyline way more incisively than my natural rhetoric.

[astaroth1357]

Brothers Accidentally Make the MC Cry

Hello, this is the obligatory italics blurb that I have to put under my titles or else things look weird and it bothers me. Don’t mind the blurb. The blurb is a friend. (Though I could start writing pieces of a little story up here just to see if anyone even reads them… Hm…. Ideas, ideas...)

Warning: Angsty

Lucifer 

If he were being honest, he’d say that a part of him had always feared this would happen...

Lucifer likes to tell himself that he’s invincible, but everyday stresses can get to him just like anybody else. And like other people, he may not always act his best when he’s dealing with a full plate…

The MC hadn’t meant to make his day harder when they told him that they accidentally broke a lamp. It was a genuine accident! But Lucifer was still dealing with the fallout from another one of Mammon’s failed schemes, Satan had cursed all of his ties again, and Beel had eaten every scrap of food in the House… for the second time that week...

In comparison to everything else, a broken lamp was quite minor, but for Lucifer it was just the last straw and, for just a moment, he lost control…

His palm slamming against his desk hard enough to snap its legs and send it crashing to the ground. He scarcely knew what kind of look he had on his face, but whatever it was, he had made his human jump back in shock...

Really, it was silly for them to assume that he had gotten that upset over a lamp, but he saw tears starting to gather in their eyes all the same as they stammered out a quiet apology… 

It felt like an ice spike to the heart. Damn his temper… He really ought to have been more careful with them after… well, everything he’d done before…

He was quick to go over to them, catching their face with his hand and giving them the most sincere apology he could muster while wiping away their tears… Overreactions aren’t becoming of him and he hated to cause them pain… 

He, of course, took care of the lamp himself as penance and on the surface that seemed to be it (but to anyone paying attention, he had softened up on the MC considerably for at least a week. They probably could have sworn in front of Diavolo and he’d let it slide, he felt that bad about it...)

“I’m sorry, MC, I shouldn't have reacted like that… You haven’t done anything wrong, I promise… Please, there’s no need to cry…”

Mammon

Oh? What's that? His heart is now in a million pieces now...? Well, that seems fair…

He and the MC were out on one of his gambling nights and he was actually on a killer winning streak for once! Jackpots around every corner, he was rolling in it!

The MC had tried to convince him to just throw in the towel early, take his winnings while he had them and bail, but he wasn’t hearing any of it.

In hindsight, their insistence must have really shown how much the MC cared about him and wanted him to keep his earnings... but in the heat of the moment all he saw was someone trying to spoil his one night of fun.

To be fair to Mammon, it’s rather rare for him to lose control of his anger like he did. But when they tried to pull him away from the roulette table, he genuinely snarled at them and told them to get lost...!

Fortunately, he regretted his actions immediately after he saw the hurt in their eyes…

If their goal had been to get him to step away from the table, they achieved it. But only because he got up to pull them into a hug while stammering out apologies… Watching them actually shed tears hurt worse than any rope Lucifer had ever tied around him...

He spent the rest of the night away from the casino and trying to cheer up his human like his life depended on it... Seeing them in pain just tore him up that much.

"Ah, come on MC… I'm sorry, honest…! Please don't look at me like that, I'll do whatever ya want okay...? Just no more cryin…"

Leviathan 

Now thinks he's the worst, literally the worst. Lower than lesser demon spit. Lower than Cerberus' shit. Lower than… well, you get the idea…

Levi can get very… intense when things involving his passions are brought up. This can be a fairly endearing quality… but it also means he gets disproportionately impassioned about seemingly minor things.

Levi ended up snapping at the MC when they let him over-sleep one day. This wasn’t unusual for them to do as Levi’s sleep schedule was notoriously shitty, but they shouldn't have done it that particular day…

An item he wanted on Akuzon was going to go live that morning and he had to be awake to participate in the bidding. He had mentioned it to the MC the day before, but he blew past it so quickly they didn’t actually remember…

He found out that he missed the bidding after he woke up and he was pissed. Genuinely enraged that they didn’t remember to wake him up to the point that he was shouting and baring his fangs! 

… Really it was not a good look and he should have known better.

The look of fear and the tears gathering in the MC’s eyes snapped him out of it like a hard slap to the face, and somehow, it stung even more than that would’ve... It wasn’t long before he was crying along with them, practically begging for forgiveness...

He made it up to them by having a private showing of their favorite movie using a projector in the Planetarium, cuddling with them under a blanket while still, occasionally, muttering apologies under his breath.

“M-MC…? MC don’t cry…!! Please don’t cry, I- I’m sorry!! I… MC… I’m so sorry…”

Satan

Like Lucifer, he always worried this would happen and he hated when it finally came to pass…

He’d spent all his life learning how to restrain his temper, but it’s not a perfect science. There are the occasional times where the heat of the moment gets the better of him and he does something he regrets…

The MC had walked in on him one morning while he was fuming about Beel leaving the fridge empty again. It hadn’t been the first time they’d seen him like this, but this time he was absolutely furious.

He had told Beel again and again and again to get his snacking under control or to, you know, get up early and get more food so the whole family wouldn’t spend the morning starving but noooo! Mr. I’m Hungry never thinks about anything but his own stomach and then leaves whoever’s on kitchen duty to pick up the slack like some dimwitted muscle-bound meathead and THEN-!!

When the MC tried to take his arm to calm him down, he jerked their hand away from him and roared right in their face. He may not be a lion, but the full sound of a pissed off demon could make humans have breakdowns all on its own…

Which was more or less what the MC began to do as he gripped their wrist, panicking while taking shallow, stuttered breaths…

Satan's anger left him swiftly and he let them go, only reaching out to touch them again when he tried to wipe the tears from their cheeks… He had to coo and beg for them to calm down, which was only so successful because he was fighting back tears himself… 

On a scale of 1-10 of the worse things his temper has ever done, he'd rank this a firm 200... He refused to touch them for about a week afterwards and it took a long time for him to trust himself again… He just didn't want to hurt them...

"MC?? MC…? M… Oh no… MC, I'm so sorry, I would never hurt you! I… I wouldn't dare… please believe me..."

Asmodeus 

Oh baby! Sweetheart! Love of his life!! No, please no… don't subject him to this…

MC and Asmo were out dancing and some witch came by to try and flatter him.

Now, Asmo is a flirt normally, but get a few drinks in him and well… Let's just say his love of attention overrides his better judgment far more often than it should and friends don't let friends go home with creepy witches.

When the MC told the witch to scram, Asmo was confused and, frankly, quite irritated. That lovely lady had been stroking his ego in all the right ways and his human just scared her off so rudely!

Under most situations, Asmo would have kept his cool better but the haze of Demonus made his tongue loose... which let the venom fly…

He couldn’t quite remember what he said. The words left his mouth so quickly that they slurred together on his clumsy tongue, but it must have been enough because the MC flinched away from him.

That hurt all on its own, but as he started to process the pain in their eyes… he had never sobered up so fast...

He had their cheeks cupped in his hands and were kissing away their tears within the instant. Though the loud music at the club should have drowned out his apologies, the MC could see it written all over his equally tearful face…

He pulled them into his arms and then out of the club shortly after, the fog of Demonus that plagued him just moments before had long left him and all he knew was that the MC needed to be brought home and cuddled… stat.

“M-MC…? I’m sorry was it something… did I…? I’m so sorry… Please don’t cry…!”

Beelzebub 

He really didn't mean to shout so loud… honest... 

Beel becomes a completely different person when he’s hungry. He’s not entirely to blame, as his hunger can get so intense, but he still can snap from time to time when he really doesn’t mean to…

It was right after one of his practices and Beel hadn’t gotten a chance to eat in a few hours by the time the MC came to grab him from RAD. That already had him in a bad mood, but practice hadn’t gone too well for him either… 

He honestly didn’t realize how sharply he snapped at the MC when they asked him how he was. The irritation and frustration of the day all hit him at once and he became much harsher towards them than he ever intended…

It must have been the shock of seeing ever-sweet Beel suddenly get so aggressive with them that startled them so. He saw a couple tears gathering in their eyes before they could hide them and his heart just sank…

The MC was picked up in a crushing bear hug before they even let out their first sniffle. Beel didn’t even have to say how sorry he was, they could feel it in every squeeze he gave them. All while he completely ignored the growling of his stomach...

Beel wouldn’t let them go until he was certain they’d forgiven him which, honestly, took a while. Mammon was the one to ask why he had carried them all the way back to the House like a baby but… well, he didn’t need to know, now did he?

“MC, I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have shouted… Are you alright...?”

Belphegor 

Stubborn boi is stubborn and trying really, really hard not to crack right now...

That's not going to last long.

Belphie can be a bit of a brat and since he's the baby of the family so he's used to getting his way. He and the MC don't argue a ton, but when they do, he always digs his heels in and refuses to budge an inch on anything.

So what started out as a simple disagreement on how often Belphie would flake out on his chores turned into a kick-the-door-down argument over how much his laziness left the MC to pick up the slack...

It ended as all their barn burning arguments do, with demon-form Belphie sitting cross-legged on his bed refusing to look at them and the MC angrily pacing about the room until he cools off…

And then he heard it.

First a sniffle… and then a hiccup. Another sniffle then muffled whine…

Oh no… not this… Why are they crying…? They don't normally cry…

To his credit (or perhaps discredit), he managed to hold out for about two minutes before he finally glanced back at them. Seeing the MC wiping their tears all alone on the floor crumbled his resolve real quick.

The MC found themselves enveloped by Belphie's arms before they even noticed he got up. Naturally, he was pouting and trying to make it seem like "not a big deal or anything" but they could tell by the nervous twitch of his tail that he was hurting too…

Needless to say. Belphie started remembering his chores a lot more after that.

"Humans are so fragile… I didn't mean to make you cry, you know? I'll get things done just… Don't cry… please…"

[gachagon]

Yeah... Marrow is the least controversial of the Ace Ops on account of being the only one to turn against Ironwood when it had become clear that he was more concerned with "winning" than saving Atlas.

But a lot of people (myself included) feel that the Ace Ops' sudden last-second redemption in the final episodes of the Volume (Harriet's especially) came out of nowhere. Like, Harriet especially felt to be in poor taste to me, given the whole "cops can get away with murder as long as they have the right friends" thing in the real world, thus making Harriet being able to get away with trying to nuke a city by accepting friendship with the other Ace Ops more INSULTING than inspiring.

(Seriously, they should've either had her sacrifice herself to fly the Nuke away from Mantle or just had Watts remotely hijack the nuke instead of having Harriet attempt genocide out of spite, and most of the issues with her arc would be resolved. Like this wouldn't have resolved any of the issues with the Ace Ops bodyshaming and dehumanizing Penny and then never having to confront their biases because they turned Penny human and then immediately killed her off, but at least Harriet wouldn't be getting off scott free for a literal war crime because she shed some crocodile tears.)

I really feel like the Ace-Op's are my only real criticism of the story so far just because they've done too much that's just irredeemable and the show never spent enough time really talking about how fucked up it was that they were willing to just kill a bunch of innocent civilians for seemingly no reason, because at that point there really WAS no reason to murk Mantle. Salem had already arrived, she was already at their doorstep, and the people of Mantle were evacuating without his help. If Ironwood really didn't care to save mantle, why waste a bomb trying to get rid of it? Really just to spite them. He wasn't thinking clearly at all and seemed to think for some stupid reason that killing everyone in Mantle would make RWBY work with him, when I can just see that making them even more upset with him.

And I don't really like what they did with Clover just because he's such a new character not just to us, but to Qrow as well. I think it'd have been better if Clover was different from the other Ace-ops like maybe he was from Beacon like Qrow and that could give them some kind of connection, and make us think Clover would've been different from the rest of them. As it stands though, their whole confrontation just seems to be too stupid and silly. Because Clover dies so early, we don't really see him do anything that makes us think he's a good person.

In fact, after he dies his teammates prove to just be even worse then what we imagined. Every time they were like "Noooo Clover was better then all of us :(" I kept thinking Was he? Lol he tried to arrest Qrow for no real reason, and got himself killed by a serial killer. Sure Qrow blames himself for working alongside Tyrian in that moment, but knowing what we know now about the Ace-ops and how they were willing to legitimately genocide all of Mantle to fuel Ironwoods ego and fear........maybe getting rid of Clover was good luck on Qrow's part, but he is too lovey dovey and sad to understand that right now.

[luckydragon10]

P&P Chapters 32, 33, 34

(Chapters 29, 30, 31)

Score check:

Mr. Darcy returns! And the man learned to flirt. Now at -5.

And Lizzy rose to +25 for being ballsy.

~~~

Chapter 32

...when she was startled by a ring at the door, the certain signal of a visitor.

Okay, this is a bit silly. Yes, doorbells mean visitors.

Mr. Darcy: “It is a proof of your own attachment to Hertfordshire. Anything beyond the very neighbourhood of Longbourn, I suppose, would appear far.”

You were doing so well last time. Are you only allowed the ability to flirt once a year, Mr. Darcy? Hopeless. Boy has such a case of the awkward.

But why Mr. Darcy came so often to the Parsonage, it was more difficult to understand.

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU, DUDE. It's no wonder Lizzy isn't catching on.

Colonel Fitzwilliam’s occasionally laughing at his stupidity, proved that he was generally different, which her own knowledge of him could not have told her; and as she would liked to have believed this change the effect of love, and the object of that love her friend Eliza, she set herself seriously to work to find it out. 

Is Darcy so tongue-tied in love that he can't figure out what to do with himself? I can't even justify taking points off. He's too pathetic for that.

~~~

Chapter 33

Oh wow, more of Darcy trying so hard to flirt. This is a train wreck. Someone help this man. I can barely watch.

Lizzy: “Do you certainly leave Kent on Saturday?” said she. Fitz: “Yes—if Darcy does not put it off again...."

OH FOR THE LOVE OF FUZZY PEACHES. Is the reason why everybody loves Darcy the fact that he's the ORIGINAL pathetic blorbo? Is that it?

My dude has spent all this time trying to get her attention, delaying his departure, and it's not working. Because he is hopeless.

Gossip gossip gossip! Lots of gossip with Fitz.

Well shit. Why do I have a feeling there's a HUGE misunderstanding brewing?

There's definitely a huge misunderstanding brewing.

Honestly, this chapter had ONE purpose and one purpose, and that was to make Lizzy think Darcy got between Jane and Bingley. No other great insights needed here, moving on.

~~~

Chapter 34

When they were gone, Elizabeth, as if intending to exasperate herself as much as possible against Mr. Darcy, chose for her employment the examination of all the letters which Jane had written to her since her being in Kent. 

We do love a good hate read.

Mr. Darcy: “In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.”

Meanwhile, Lizzy:

His sense of her inferiority—of its being a degradation—of the family obstacles which had always opposed to inclination, were dwelt on with a warmth which seemed due to the consequence he was wounding, but was very unlikely to recommend his suit.

I SEVERELY regret that this is in summary rather than dialogue.

He concluded with representing to her the strength of that attachment which, in spite of all his endeavours, he had found impossible to conquer;

OMG, dude, your love confession is bombing, MAYDAY, MAYDAY.

I gotta do it. I gotta take 5 points off. Bro. You are drowning.

Maybe JUST confess the love and don't rush into a proposal?! Get the mutual love first before jumping in any deeper. OMG, noooo.

Lizzy: "I have never desired your good opinion, and you have certainly bestowed it most unwillingly."

I almost feel bad for Mr. Darcy. BUT, "almost" is not "do."

“I have no wish of denying that I did everything in my power to separate my friend from your sister, or that I rejoice in my success. Towards him I have been kinder than towards myself.”

Wait wait wait. It wasn't a misunderstanding?

Okay, I guess that's another thing I'll be awaiting an explanation for, along with whatever the hell was up with Wicky. (Reminder: I hate spoilers, so shh.)

Mr. Darcy: "Could you expect me to rejoice in the inferiority of your connections?—to congratulate myself on the hope of relations, whose condition in life is so decidedly beneath my own?”

I'll just be taking another 5 points off, sir.

Lizzy: "...and I had not known you a month before I felt that you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry.”

That's gonna come back to haunt you.

~~~

That was eventful.

(Chapters 35 and 36)