#BUT I STILL TRY TO MAKE IT PLATONIC SO FUCKING HARD BECAUSE THESE DON'T HAVE TO BE ROMANTIC IS BRO LOVE

[nanamisgirly]

cw geto is maybe bi here idk, chubby nerd!reader with a bit of attitude, tbh there's no cw it's borderline between smut and fluff

part.2 part.3 part.4

˖ 𑣲 comments and reblogs are always appreciated ma girliees :33

womanizer!geto loves fucking women. truly he does! they are all wrapped around his fingers and all he has to do is glancing at them. and this goes for the whole campus!! even boys would fuck him if he'd give them the chance. and maybe, if the mood struck just right at a party or in a messy, drunken threesome/orgies, he does fuck the boys.

but womanizer!geto has also a nerd bestie. the typical nerd girl. she was everything but his type. nothing that looked like his usual hookup girls. she was not fit, but not exactly fat. just chubby. her acne scars from high school still there with still some pimples that comes and go. and of course the infamous nerd glasses that didn't seem to want to stay on her nose.

you were not someone womanizer!geto would ever fuck. that's why you're friends. strictly platonic. he liked how you never batted an eye at his reputation, never judged, never treated him like a conquest. you both grow close through the years together in the same degree, during the late nights session study in the library before exams, for you it was monnnths before exams, you're a little ball of stress.

womanizer!geto doesn't like when guys approached you. not because he cares—why would he? it just...doesn't make sense. you're not the kind of girl men chase. not the kind they brag about. so he makes sure to lecture you about it—especially about frat boys. "they’re the worst," he mutters, arm slung lazily over your chair as his knee bumped against yours under the table. "trust me, nerd. they only act nice 'cause they wanna see how you moan." you rolled your eyes, setting your pen down with an amused scoff. "do you think i've never fucked, suguru?" you shrugged, smirking at his clueless expression "just 'cause i'm shy and a 'nerd' doesn't mean I don't enjoy a good fuck." well, you were lying but he doesn't need to know that. you were probably having sex every couples of months and it wasn't even that good. your voice was light when you added, "thanks for the concern, though." something in his chest stutters. and for some reason, he has to look away.

womanizer!geto has no shame. he lets girls climb into his lap, lets their hands wander, lets them grind against him right on the couch with people around. almost fucking them on the spot. but never when you're around! why? well, he tells himself it's respect. at least, that's the excuse he clings to. because why else would he pull away from a pretty thing palming his cock just to go talk to you? right? he's just...pitying you. that's all. and yet—when he finally starts to feel his cock hardening in his pants, he tells himself it has nothing to do with your wide, innocent eyes blinking up at him. nothing to do with the way your lips part, soft and expectant. his dick is...delayed. yeah. just slow to catch up to the last girl's game. horrible by the way.

and of course womanizer!geto is trying to subtly adjust his pants. he's forcing his mind elsewhere—anywhere else—because if he lets himself think too hard about how fucking pretty you look right now, he's going to have a problem. a big one.

womanizer!geto keeps a polaroid of you in his wallet. only because you are his bestie! don't get any ideas on that. he found the picture cute that's it. the two of you, standing under a canopy of cherry blossom, petals floating around you like something out of a dream. his strong arm wrapped tightly around your plush waist, your round soft tits pressing against his chest. it had been an innocent day. really. he had dragged you out after hours of studying, calling you a nerd and insisting you needed air before your brain cells ended up smeared on the library table. what was supposed to be a thirty minutes walk turned into four hours. and when you reaching this pretty alley he couldn't help but suggest a pic—just for the memory! and obviously his arm was around you only to male sur you both fit in the camera frame. obviously. he was not dying to touch you!

and now here it was. the damn polaroid in gojo's hand. the white-haired menace grinning like he just found the greatest blackmail material of all time. "damn, suguru, you look so whipped." geto's eye twitched.

"look at this! holding our nerd like she's breakable—aww, how so sweet!!" gojo snickered, flipping the photo dramatically. "and—hold on. did she kiss your cheek?" suguru said nothing, jaw locked as his mind instantly flashed back to that moment—how you rose on your tiptoes, one hand pressing slightly on his broad shoulder to steady yourself as you leaned in, brushing a soft kiss to his cheek. he had frozen for a second and he vividly recall your flushed face, wide eyes as you apologized profusely, muttering something about being 'carried away by the moment' and how it was simply a 'friendly' gesture.

his cock begins to stir at the memory of your soft lips against his skin. his heart skipping some beats.

"wait—holy shit." gojo barks out a laugh. "you keep this in your wallet? what, you jerk off to it?" your entire soul leaves your body. geto sees the way your eyes go wide, the way your hands fly to your face in horror.

and that's it. geto slowly stands up, cracking his knuckles and rolls his shoulders. "satoru," he said, voice eerily calm. gojo gulped. he was a dead man walking.

womanizer!geto tells himself he's just messing with you—that the way his fingers linger when he wipes a stray drop of your melting ice cream isn’t because he’s imagining how warm and soft your mouth would feel wrapped around his fingers. he convinces himself that when you lick your spoon, tongue flicking over the tip—his cock is not aching dreaming to be at the metal-stenciled place. and his rock-hard cock has definitely nothing to do with the way your thighs spread soft and full against the couch or the way your tits bouncy sightly every time you shift.

womanizer!geto is totally fine when you stretch on the couch next to him. arms up, back arching, body pushing forward, making your curves more prominent, making that cute little tummy press out—wait what?? geto shook his head trying to get back to his senses. no need to highlight it was impossible with the way his cock twitched in his pants.

womanizer!geto, obviously, does not want something with you..he does not want to bury himself into the plush softness of his nerd best friend, does not want to hear how sweetly you'd whimper his name. she's not his type!!!!

°‧★ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁( 。 •̀ ᴖ •́ 。)

a/n chubby girls are the biggest win 🙂‍↕️☝️

[weebsinstash]

Now that we've witnessed the Invincible War, I can't help but think of a scenario of "it turns out you're Mark's partner/unwilling darling in every single other universe and when the alternate Marks show up for the big battle, they all freak out at the sight of you because all of them have lost you in their own universes"

Like it's almost a Spiderverse scenario where you arrive on the scene and you find out you're dead in every other universe. Maybe you're the only version of yourself that has powers. Maybe you're the only version of yourself that DOESN'T have powers. Maybe you're the only version of yourself that has Mark as a good platonic friend and every other version of him became Nice Guy Incel From Hell that felt like you belonged with them and either drove you to suicide, lost you in an accident, or accidentally killed you themselves, or maybe you were even totally cool with him and someone else killed you or even something tragic like dying in childbirth

Oh, so there's an evil version of Mark that missed his mom so badly he was going to kidnap an alternate universe version of her to take home?? So you're telling me these guys would absolutely have enough screws loose to immediately call up Angstrom and say that taking you is now part of the deal then?

The versions of Mark who were raised on Viltrum or joined his father, the ones who pride themselves in their superiority and violence, being so impressed by this powerful majestic, strong, superpowered version of you, oh so ready and willing to straight up kill them to defend Earth. But on the flip side, these vicious versions of Mark who knew you as that stoic hero now seeing you powerless and vulnerable and scared and so, so easily hurt.

Some of them can't help but immediately freeze up at the sight of you and stare, unable to look away as they process that, yeah, that's really who they think it is. Some of them start crying and beeline for you immediately. Some of them just start freaking out and all but hyperventilating, "holy shit is this for real?! Am I dreaming right now?! Is that really you?!"

Can you imagine one of them grabbing you and saying some WILD shit like, "oh my god, I'm so so sorry, I didn't mean to kill you, you just kept screaming and crying and i-i freaked out and I didn't realize I was squeezing so hard, I didn't mean to snap your neck, I promise it'll NEVER happen again" like genuinely that shit would make me u-turn right the fuck out of that battle and have Mark and Cecil or whomever the fuck get to fight this crazed psycho who looks and sounds exactly like your good friend, but let's be real, the second you try to run you would have EVERY version of Mark immediately after your ass

Picture this: one of the evil Marks is so genuinely euphoric to see you again that he rushes up to you and hugs you so tightly it cracks one of your ribs and makes you cry out in pain. Suddenly he's jerking back, his face cycling through several emotions. He's still holding on to a wrist or your shoulders and he and any other Marks present suddenly realize, oh fuck you don't have any powers? Like imagine trying to pull yourself away with all of your strength and they can all tell it's doing absolutely nothing as the one holding you just murmurs, "wait, why are you so weak...?" with obvious fear and concern trickling into his voice

All of them instantly detouring their plans to start fighting over you. Another Mark knocks out the teeth of the one who just cracked your ribs. A Mark whose entire goal was to use Angstrom to find another you completely unable to stop himself from scooping you up off your feet, promising he's going to tell you somewhere safe and about to fly away with you before getting suckerpunched by another Mark with the exact same idea. One Mark flying up. "Oh sorry, this was your little date-night buddy? They were my SPOUSE"

On the flip side, you being a viltrumite hybrid yourself or some other mutant or superpowered individual that they're completely unused to and the ones who lust for battle getting the biggest adrenaline/endorphin rush of their lives as you're actually strong enough to knock them around. More masochistic Marks all but having their eyes roll back into their heads as you punch or kick or throw them. You being so strong that it takes at least 2 or 3 of them to completely pin you down

Something something "evil Marks having to team up to take you down and once you're finally subdued and are pinned down and helpless they basically run a train on you in the middle of the rubble of a burning city" something something

The good guys and you and your friends managing to win and drive the variants away and kill Angstrom and you ultimately find out "your" Mark is just as equally obsessive and mentally unstable as all the rest and he was just the best one at hiding it. He was happy juat pretending to be your "platonic friend" and looking after you but he was intending to play 4d chess and work his way into your heart. Now that your life and safety were threatened, it finally triggers him to drop off the deep end and start making more drastic moves. Ok, so Cecil wants him to work for the government again and lead the Guardians huh? Maybe he'll consider accepting IF the GDA helps him contain you and keep you safe and healthy. Maybe he'll consider IF Cecil basically signs off on you being a captive of Mark's that the government turns a blind eye to as long as he protects the planet. Maybe you try and fly away and find out YOU have a thingy in YOUR head and Cecil basically knocks you out of the sky because damn it, he's not going to let another however many millions of people die just so you can stay single, let alone risk finding out what Mark is going to do now that he's starting to lose it

Whether you're a human or a hero, you'll be fucked either way

[kastalani123]

Not my usual content, but I just. I wanna ramble, ig.

Do you understand how baffled I was about how the vampire book, written by a man in 1897, is essentially a PSA about how important proper communication is?? Even after I scrolled through Tumblr, saw the memes, read people geeking out about the relationships (platonic and romantic) in Dracula, I was still caught off guard, because. Like. Everything in this book is about communication.

Sure, it's kind of a given, considering it's an epistolary novel partially made up of letters between the characters, but. I dunno. From Dracula controlling Johnathan's lettres, van Hellsing refusing to tell anyone shit, the men keeping Mina out of the loop, to Mina using her telepathic link with Dracula, it's. It's literally all about how important actually talking to each other and sharing information is. Fuck, throw in the fact that "Harker", Mina and Jonathan's, arguably the main characters, last name means "to listen"/"eavesdropper", and that the book is Mina's in-universe creation to help compile, organize, and share what they know about Dracula, and the book's very essence becomes centered around information-sharing!

And I just. The narrative punishes just about every secret hidden, every time the characters don't communicate. There's the obvious, Dracula keeping Johnathan from sending out letters for help and Mina getting bitten because the men leave her home alone, but also. Van Hellsing not telling Lucy's mom that the garlic flowers and closed windows and so on are the treatment and she is not to touch them is what kills Lucy and her mom! They maybe could have survived if he just told them what's happening/what he's doing! And even the godsdamned telegram he sends to Seward! If he had just addressed it properly (communicated to the telegram boy properly!) then Seward wouldn't have been late and maybe could have prevented the massacre!

There's also Jonathan's diary right after he finally reunites with Mina, and obviously Mina's whole ✨ thing ✨ with the diary during their wedding is like. Peak romance, but Johnathan doesn't fully get better until Mina reads and shares it with van Hellsing and van Hellsing assures Johnathan that he's not insane. Sure, it's an oversimplification of PTSD and healing and such, but it makes sense, especially if you consider communication and information sharing as a major theme! Only sharing his experiences, reading through them himself after blocking off the memories, is what heals him! He cannot get better without knowing what happened, and without others knowing what happened, because knowing and sharing is important.

Renfield's also an interesting case. I don't have the book with me right now to check, but as far as I remember, he tries to talk about Dracula, tries to get Seward to release him from the asylum so Dracula can't use him against Mina, but is dismissed entirely; as a consequence, Dracula gets in the building, kills Renfield, and bites Mina.

Even the language barriers! The villagers Johnathan meets on his way to Dracula's castle try so hard to warn him of the danger but they can't. They can't, because they don't speak enough of the same language, but they try so hard. But whatever does get through to Johnathan, such as that woman begging him to take the crucifix she gives him — that might've saved him. It keeps him unsettled and wary and he does keep the crucifix, which wards Dracula off. They can't communicate the full extent of the danger, but what they managed is probably responsible for him surviving.

And the whole idea is even mentioned in-text! Sure, Lucy saying that a wife ought to share everything she knows with her husband is definitely sexism-flavoured, but Johnathan says it too! He says that his idea of an ideal marriage is one without secrets! And Johnathan is effeminate, yes, he spends a good chunk of the book as the "damsel in distress", but he is still the hero! He is still the one who kills Dracula (with Quincey), and can therefore be assumed to be an intended role model. The (male) main character and hero of an 1897 novel says that a good relationship relies on communication. Sure, he doesn't always stick to it, mostly by agreeing to keep Mina out of the loop when van Hellsing pushes for it, but that doesn't discount that that is what Stoker set as the ideal.

I just. I love this book so much. It subverted just about all expectations I might've had about it and I'm so glad for it. It's undeniably a product of its time, with plenty of racism and sexism and ableism, but it's also so. Not, at the same time? It's so good.

[a-hazbin-reader]

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Violence, Kidnapping, Alastor eating bitches

Description: Alastor's X Wife!Reader who gets kidnapped and how he deals with that

Alastor's relationship with you is a strong one, the two of of you drawn to each other in an almost supernatural way

But you also trust each other's strengths and aren't prone to stepping in each other's fights

Regardless of how powerful you are

I got your pinkie fingers bby go kick his ass

Holds your shopping bags for you while you go kick ass

Unless of course you ask him to

He likes it when you fix his hair afterwards, preening like a giant rooster as you do

THE POINT IS-

It's not like Alastor spends all his time glued to your hip or sending you out with bodyguards

You can take a damn walk by yourself

You do have a target on back though, if not because of your own strength/actions, then because of your husband

So it's not unusual when someone tries to pick a fight with you

But when you're suddenly ambushed and kidnapped, against the fact that you fought hard to avoid it

Fucking holy weapons

That's new

Well I suppose you'll just have to wait for your husband to come and get you out of this mess

*spits out blood*

Not you bragging about how fucked your kidnappers are once Alastor gets there

He's already going to be mad that they kidnapped his wife, but the fact that they've now put hands on you??? Made you bleed???

Oh they're so fucked

So just sit back and look pretty while you wait for your boo to come and rescue you

And you do look pretty

Keep your damn hands off

Alastor knows something is up when you don't come home, knows that someone must've gotten to you

If the old geezer watched tv maybe he would've known a little sooner

Maybe he would've known that your little fight made the news

Tf was he gonna do?? Wait for it to show up in the papers??

BREAKING NEWS!! RADIO DEMON'S BABE WIFE GETS KIDNAPPED AFTER EPIC BATTLE!

But when Angel shows him that you've been kidnapped Alastor literally just-

Makes this face:

Oh he's getting his wife back

RIP Angel's phone 😭

He's visibly very calm about the whole thing though, which makes the others even more worried

"Well then! I suppose I'll have to get Y/N back myself, won't I? You all wait here, I won't be long now~"

Alastor does give them a chance to give you back before he comes and hunts them down

It's one of the most terrifying radio broadcasts people have listened to but this is his WIFE we're talking about

On the inside he is VERY ANGRY

Even if they do bring you back he still eats them

Fuck them he never promised them anything

They took and HURT HIS WIFE

If they don't bring you back then they're going to be subjected to slaughter like they've never known before being eaten

Not him using his massive demonic form to rip apart their safe house

Anyone who doesn't know Alastor like you do will think he's being surprisingly playful about it all

But as his wifers you know he's raging by the look in his eyes 👀 not merely playing with his food

Not wifey just sitting back and admiring Alastor while he works 💅✨️

Damn this is really doing it for me

Admires how elegantly you stretch and rub your wrists after your bindings are undone, so graceful even after taking a beating

"Thank you, Alastor~ Right on time as always~"

He begs to differ

"Anything for you, my dear."

Won't really look at you until you grab his chin and force him to, Alastor giving you a guilty smile

Le kiss

Leans in to touch foreheads with you, the two of relaxing in each other's arms amongst the carnage

Casually licks the blood off your face to ruin the moment before taking your arm

"Now let's get you home, my darling~"

Doesn't leave you alone for the rest of the night, trying to hide the fact that he's fretting over you

You want to take a bath and get cleaned up? He'll help you!

You want to lay down and rest after a stressful day? He's actually pretty tired too so you two should go to bed together

Will 100% broadcast their screaming souls as a warning to anyone else who wants to try that little stunt again

Falls asleep to it actually, one arm wrapped around you as he drifts off so that when he wakes up, he'll know you're right there with him

He doesn't think any less of you, he's been beat before too

Don't remind him

Will absolutely call himself your hero for like a week straight and land himself in the doghouse by the end of it

[asce-of-hearts]

hello! I love your writings, I would like to ask you for some headcanons of platonic aizawa, present mic, hawks and endevor (separately) with a girl from the exchange program who stays at her house

Exchange

contents: Headcanons of Yan!Aizawa, Yan!Endeavor, Yan!Present Mic and Yan!Hawks with fem!reader who is an exchange student who is staying at their house. (Platonic!Yandere)

more Aizawa, Endeavor, Present Mic and Hawks content here!!

WARNINGS: IMPLIED CHILD/TEEN READER.

Aizawa Shota - Eraserhead

For someone who looks so relaxed, he's surprisingly strict.

With a death glare he tells you to behave. But he's never rude. He's just very stern, overprotective even.

"If something were to happen to you under my care, ___. What would I tell your parents?" it's his favorite phrase in all the world. Whenever you ask him for permission to do something, that's always his answer.

The only thing he isn't strict about is your sleep schedule. So long your finish your chores and homework, sleep as late as you want and wake up at whatever hour you prefer.

He's like... a dad in every sense of the word. He won't praise you, in fact, he'll tell you you suck ass all the time. In a loving way. Still, sometimes you see that unique look on his face when he's impressed by you, or moved, or whatever.

Enji Todoroki - Endeavor

He's trying to prove he doesn't suck ass. And he fails rather miserably at it.

He tries his best to be cool, a cool dad, a cool mentor, whatever. He isn't, his jokes are bad and being around him is uncomfortable at first. Mostly because he looks so fucking angry all the time.

Getting to know him is hard, takes a lot of patience. But after all, you learn he's not that bad. He's strangely comforting.

He gives you a warm embrace whenever you fuck up. He specially likes it when you cry, so he can pat your back reassuringly as he tells you how special you are to him, how important, how in his eyes, you'll always be number one.

He's fairly easy to manipulate. Just act upset, don't speak to him much and he'll bend and break within seconds, acting to your every whim.

Hizashi Yamada - Present Mic

Hizashi doesn't know what he's doing. It's not usual that they put children over his care, so he really is puzzled on what to do. What do you eat? What do you like? Does he have to take you on walks?

He tries his best, even if that means slacking off a little and eating junk food a lot of the time. But he makes you give your best, and will make you work hard to earn luxuries under his care.

He's loud, he likes loud people and loud places. He likes rowdy children who will break stuff and get dirty. He smiles a lot, he's warm and caring, and a good guy in general.

He's very tender, often getting very distressed at the thought of you doing dangerous things. He always seems about to pop a vessel whenever you go on a mission without him.

Keigo Takami - Hawks

Hawks is absolutely terrified of children. Much more when they're gifted. He sees himself in those eyes, in those bodies. And he panics.

He tries to act cool, non chalant, like he doesn't want to wrap you with his wings and keep you safe from everything around you. Like he won't take a bullet in the head just to ensure you get home safe from school. He's very good at pretending he doesn't care.

Perhaps the most overwhelming of the bunch. He has eyes and ears everywhere, he knows when you're lying, when you're feeling anything, when you crave, when you dream, when you cry. He knows it.

He's all over you. Picks out your clothes, your hobbies, your diets. He's a control freak.

But he's sweet. Always offering you comforting words and reassuring smiles. Always having something to bribe you with, to keep you content. To keep you his.

hope you enjoyed this

have a great day/night

TAGGING: @DollyWonyoung @garfieldthomas @Aki-sazuku @akirahyoshi @pasteldaze @Voidthewriting @rania200527 @mizzhellsingstuff @lilyalone @jessicainhell @duchessofhell85  @rosemary108233 @yukimutsu @repostingmyfavs @artist-in-training-wheels @mod-kyoko @rina-404 @eroscastle @fan4mha @goldenglow149 @hbk99450 @stranger00001 @DelicatelyCraftedBambi @kitzusune @Blueivyoreo @lakxcpsta @stardustdreamersisi @coolnekochan9961 @notreallyablogger @skeletonblush @moondrop-gummies

Like my works? Join the TAG LIST!    (please write your @ correctly or else the tag won't work)

[cultofcipher]

Bill Cipher thoughts (BoB Spoilers Ahead)

I'm really sitting on how Bill's displayed so much of himself indirectly in the BoB. How during the Love section he denies having exes, marking them out. How said exes show up SEVERAL times scratched out or are regarded with this bitterness of someone who did NOT do the breaking up part. Bill got dumped. Every time. And is desperately trying to bury his feelings.

And that's something I think the Book of Bill really highlights in a way. The fact that Bill has feelings. That deep down he's a broken triangle. It's all over the book's writing. Him pointing out how to use denial and rationalization and other bad coping mechanisms to basically ignore and lie to himself (and show us how to do it) and basically convince himself that he is as heartless as he tries to be. Him avoiding his exes. The tone he uses and the avoidance really giving the "I don't handle breakups well and I'm still petty about it". Him constantly telling himself that he's fine. He's not fine. Him crying over Ford leaving and getting wasted. Him being bitter about the henchmaniacs not calling. His regret over what happened to his world. His loneliness. GOD his loneliness. His self-hatred. His scathing remark about definitely NOT having some tragic backstory that humanizes him and how he's not an "I can fix him case". Calling himself a monster. His longing for home. The "Last one breathing". The "I tried to change the past". The "my hands shaking, as I realized I could never undo the". The "until there was no one left but me, covered in blood, alone in the universe". The goddamn "I don't want to die alone" Valentine's card. The last few pages. Just, the last few pages. That isolation, his pained "I'M FINE". The almost sad plea for someone to let him out.

Bill cares. He's fucked up, unstable, violent. But he does care about people he gets along with and he feels understand him. For every "I'm just playing the bit" and using people with nice gestures, I think a fraction of that is somewhat genuine. And he hates it. He hates his own vulnerability. He hates his lack of apathy. He's denying himself his own emotions constantly under so many layers of distractions, eldritch horrors, and repression. He can't think about home, about failure, about how every relationship he's ever had, platonically or otherwise, ended. And it wasn't on his terms.

Him talking about/to his mom when he's drunk. How his mom called him Billy as a kid. How his home life sounded simple. How Bill as an individual is anything BUT simple. And how his drunken state holds such fondness for that simplicity, yet it was suffocating. How he would've broken free eventually, inevitably, because he knew that's who he was. It's his nature. He was destined for more.

How it cost him everything.

How he's constantly chasing insanity like it's a drug. Like he needs the power trip to stay high. To not think too hard. To drown out his emotions and his self-reflections and everything he hates about himself.

How in Gravity Falls he still tried to get Ford to side with him after everything, cause that was his vulnerability showing, for the slightest glimpse of a moment. Cause he doesn't want to do it alone. Him reaching out to the reader in his book, because he doesn't want to do it alone. Can't do it alone. Even when he eventually betrays that person, I think him offering Ford that cushy spot alongside his henchmaniacs makes me think that yeah, Bill actually would've upheld his end of the deal.

He thinks he wants multiversal domination. He thinks Weirdmageddon is his Magnum Oppus. His purpose. But he's so lost. If he ever does get what he wants, he won't know what to do with himself. He'll be faced with the "Now what?". He'll hit the end of the road and realize how unsatisfying it is. How this isn't what he wanted.

How lonely it is to be God.

I think the Axolotl sees that in Bill. It's why he doesn't try to destroy him or attack him or anything. He sees that inner self of Bill. Sees him for what he really is. Someone who needs a LOT of therapy, a true, honest to goodness friend or partner in his life, and maybe a more sustainable life purpose or hobby. He has so much potential and in a way his pursuit of power, rather than being an actualization of his abilities, is a waste of them, because it gets him nowhere.

And he needs help, even if he doesn't think he does. He's a depressed alcoholic frat boy trying to drown his misery in a way that hurts and kills worlds. He's a girlfailure, a bisexual/pansexual disaster (he's at LEAST canonically bisexual or at MOST canonically pan cause this guy has dated both ways).

Bill's book is so incredibly amazing for what it is. All the lies, all the unrealiable narrator parts of Bill's facades and flaws and him being himself and all of his genuine thoughts and feelings bleeding through the lines and showing themselves but only in a way that you can really understand if you understand him and can tell when he's lying and when he's not. To see the real parts of him, and everything else. This book was perfect, and it was perfectly imperfectly him. This truly is Bill's book. It's so him in such a raw and genuine yet dishonest way. I'm gonna cherish this damn book forever.

[oddballwriter]

bbq ena x introvert reader that is very open with her? Like awkward introvert reader that outwardly seems stoic but gets super silly round her cuz ena fucking rocks. Could be co worker even

DREAM BBQ ENA w/ an introvert reader who doesn’t talk to people except for her

Warnings: reader is an introvert and people keep trying to talk to them, ENA lowkey flirting with the reader sometimes

I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.

Don't worry about having to talk to people, ENA does enough talking for the both of you. Her salesperson sidecalls you her "demonstrator/assistant" when showing off her myriads of little products that she's trying to sell to different people or her extra pair of hands since “team work exercises help enhance productivity”. That’s her way of saying that sometimes you help her when she gets stuck on things are is having a moment and needs to get back on track.

She still tries to get you to talk sometimes though but if it fails she will just excuse you and say that “client work is not in their quota today” and occasionally her meanie side flat out calls you “poor with words and not paid for chattering”

ENA appreciates that you feel comfortable enough with her to let your true self shine through since a lot of people don’t really feel or bother to form that connection with her. So when she learns that you goofing off with her and cracking jokes is because you feel comfortable and at ease with her, she’s over the moon and stars about it.

Her salesperson side is always willing to have “partake in workplace and water cooler humor and banter” with you, which is just her freely say all her stupid and ridiculous sales pitches which are clearly scams and prism schemes that she thinks you’ll find amusing. Her meanie side also makes fun of you in a more teasing way rather than her usual insulting manner that she has with other people. If you say something really dumb she says “What’s your head full of? Spare junk? If you got paid for thinking, we’d be piss poor.” while poking your head.

It’s kind of hard for others to tell that her meanie side is just messing with you because she sounds the exact same, but you can just sense the vibe of it from her.

Her meanie said also wards off anyone who’s looking at you for too long when you’re clearly trying to to avoid interacting by calling them out with megaphone and all. “WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, YOU CLAM HEAD? YOU GOT A STARING PROBLEM OR WHAT?”

Meanie is also your version of “They said ‘no pickles’!”

On the other hand, her salesperson, again, will gladly do all the “sales pitching” for the both of you and make sure that all your “work” goes appreciated by also giving you credit too for when a job is done.

“I couldn’t have done it without my faithful companion.”

“My assistant did most of the heavy lifting and being a highly profitable hand.”

She never really calls you her co-worker. Even with her meanie side she says “partner” and even “pal” or “friend”, completely removing professionalism and formally. When ENA says these, they sometimes even sound like more than just platonic too.

Her salesperson side can be a bit of a charmer, “as part of achieving higher likelihood of successfully locking in a sale”, but sometimes she puts it on for you when no one else is around or listening, like she’s willingly flirting with you. You can’t tell if she’s also just messing with you as part of your regular banter but you’d be lying if you said that she couldn’t charm you into doing something for her. She’s actually gotten quite close too. She made her idea of an mlm about t-shirts that say “little noodle” on them sound very appealing and fashionable.

Maybe she is flirting with you. You can’t really tell with how all over the place she is with her words

[wosospacegirl]

New kid thing - Arsenal teen!r

Summary: Y/n gets her period during her first day of training at Arsenal, and the girls make sure she is comfortable.

Warnings: Y/n has a small platonic crush on Leah, but nothing weird since she is just 17.

Word count: 2k

Masterlist here

..

Training with a new team for the first time was embarrassing enough, especially if you were a 17-year-old girl making your debut with a senior team where half the players had played in the Olympics, the World Cup, or both.

Y/n felt out of her depth—nervous and, frankly, like a child trying to fill shoes that were too big for her. She knew she had to be at least a little talented to have signed a two-year contract with the Gunners, but her nerves wouldn't let her relax. 

The team immediately noticed her nervousness and was quite good at making Y/n feel welcome. After a few pleasantries from McCabe and Kyra, Y/n even smiled a little and told the girls about her history with football, and how she got into the sport. She had a nice chat with the two Arsenal girls and felt a real connection with them, probably because they were also foreigners in the country.

“It's going to be a little weird at first,” McCabe said. “A lot of new faces, a new culture, a new way of training and playing, but don’t worry, you'll fit right in.” The Irish sat down besides Y/n and patted her on the back.

“Yeah, and if you need someone to talk to, or want to wind out and maybe go for a walk to get to know London you can call me,” Kyre smiled. “Besides, all these old women have no idea about the cool places in London, I know a few places and would be happy to take you.

“Wow, are you calling us old and lame?” McCabe argued

The two girls began to argue as Y/n laughed and giggled.

The rest of the day went smoothly, much to Y/n's surprise. She met many of the staff and was pleased to learn that Arsenal had a team of psychologists, gynecologists and even psychiatrists. Professional players know how hard it is to find a medical specialty that also understands the toll that sport can take on the body, and how some treatments work for non-footballers but don't for footballers, especially because of inadvertent doping caused by convenient medicine and all that.

The team was doing some cool-down stretches while listening to country music - it was Leah's day to choose the music played during training - and Y/n was humming along to some of the songs she knew. Suddenly the 17-year-old felt a familiar pain in her stomach. 

Fuck no, not now, Y/ n thought to herself. She couldn't be having her period right now. It was her first day on a professional team, she was wearing white shorts and everyone was there, chatting away in a semicircle, even captain Leah Williamson, who Y/n had been fangirling since she was 13-years-old.

Y/n was well aware that periods were normal, and that they happened to every single woman on the team, but she was still embarrassed about it. Would they think she was immature? Not having the fucking capacity to pack at least one pad or tampon in her training bag?

Ok, maybe she was being too hard on herself.

Y/n just needed the older girls to finish their cooldown first, so she could be the last to leave the gym.

Five minutes passed. Then 10, and then 15… All the girls were still stretching their legs and thighs. Y/n looked around, trying to come up with another escape plan as the Arsenal women seemed to be enjoying their stretching time a little too much.

“You ok, Y/n?” Leah asked, catching Y/n off guard. It wasn’t that the captain was unwelcoming or anything, but Leah hadn’t really talked to her besides the classic greetings. Y/n remembered watching an interview where Leah said she was a bit more reserved with new people, and that she needed time to warm up, so she wasn’t very bummed about that.

“Oh, yeah, very much ok… yeah!” Y/n lied, and it was a very bad lie because none of the girls believed it, they just looked at her instead.

“It’s ok to be nervous, Y/n,” Lessie said, patting Y/n’s arm. “Everyone here was new at first, except Leah who’s been here since she was a kid,” Lessie joked cheekily, looking at the captain. “I know you’ll feel more at home in no time.”

Lessie was a real sweetie, trying to make Y/n feel welcome, little did she know that the whole  new kid thing had moved way down the list of her problems today.

“Thank you, Lessie. It will get easier in the next few days.” Y/n smiled. Thank God the girls haven’t known her yet, because they would have been able to tell right away how much of a fake smile Y/n was putting on.

The 17-year-old shifted her position, stretching her arm and trying not to move too much, afraid that the blood would stainfic her kit. Well, who she was kidding, judging  by her flow it was safe to say that her bottom and the middle of her tights were a war zone right now.

She just needed to wait a few more minutes and then the players would all be gone and the girl would be able to take a shower in the changing room, then take a cap home, put a pad on, and clean her kit as if nothing happened.

Just a few more minutes and no one would know.

One by one the girls got up and went to the changing room to get ready to go home. Y/n prayed that they would take their showers at home and not in the changing room, that way they would go home faster and Y/n would be able to get the situation under control.

McCabe and Foord were the last ones to get up from the floor. “Are you coming, Y/n?” The Matilda asked, smiling.

“Yeah, right behind you,” Y/n said with fake enthusiasm.

When the two older women entered the changing room Y/n waited for a few minutes. Y/n stood up very carefully, scared to look at the floor and find a pool of her period blood, luckily the floor was spotless.

“Ok, that was close, I just need to—”

“Oh kid, I think you got your period!”

No, no, no, no.

Y/n froze.

The voice Y/n heard came from behind her back, it belonged to Leah. The young girl was mortified, Leah could very well see the stain of blood in her clothes. 

Fuck, getting your period unexpectedly was very embarrassing, but to have Leah Williamson, team captain, and lioness captain, the woman who you had a very innocent crush on (who wouldn't? come on), tell you you had  period was even worse, Y/n thought to herself, still trying to find the courage to face the captain.

Y/n felt a warm hand on her shoulder. “I’ve got some tampons if you need them, They’re in my locker, c’mon, I’ll give you some, ok?” Leah said, her voice soft now as if she knew the girl was embarrassed.

Y/n turned around, her cheeks warm with embarrassment. “I-I didn’t know I was getting my period today,” Y/n said, avoiding making eye contact with Leah. 

“It’s alright, stuff like that happens all the time, especially here,” Leah said, putting her arm around the young girl’s shoulder and leading her to the changing room. “We are a team of what? 30 women, we just learn to work around periods, and cramps and all that, that’s why we have a gynaecologist.”

Y/n remained silent, looking at the floor and wishing a double-decker bus would kill her right now.

They got into the locker room, half the girls were still in there.

Yeah, I’m definitely throwing myself in front of the first car that drives by, there is no way that this is my first day and I’m already making a fool of myself. Y/n thought as she sat in front of Leah's locker after grabbing her jacket and tying it around her waist. The others didn’t need to see the mess in her training shorts too.

The captain was very calm, whistling Sweet Carolina as she opened a toiletry bag. It looked like she was very used to these types of situations. Y/n wondered if Leah had gone through this t with any of the other girls on the team before.

“What size do you usually use?” Leah asked bluntly, clearly not trying to be subtle about it. Yeah, maybe she was a bit too comfortable with this topic. “I only have like, super plus,” Leah said, showing you a lilac packed with tampons in it.

“Hm, I normally just have regulars or smalls,” Y/n said hesitantly. “But these are ok, thank you.” They were not ok, Y/n looked at the tampons and knew they wouldn't fit comfortably.

Y/n was never a tampon girl, she always thought pads were more comfortable, she only used tampons on match days or during hard training sessions.

Y/n reached out d to take the pack of tampons from Leah’s hand, but before she could do that Leah shouted to the other side of the changing room. “Hey, Kyra, Less, have either of you got smaller tampons? Y/n needs some.”

“No! It’s alright, please, I don’t want to be a both–”

“I’ve got some,” Less said, smiling af if she was very happy to help. “Here Y/n, these are regulars, but I also have a small one too if you need it.” The blonde handed Y/n a blue box, which the young girl took.

“Thank you, you both,” Y/n said sincerely.

“Is that why you were a bit sad during the cool-down?” Less asked

“Hm, yeah, I just was - well, I am a bit embarrassed and all that, I know periods are normal and blah blah blah, but I’m just a little uncomfortable about it.” You confess, looking at Leah and Less.

“Periods are hard to talk about because people think we should be ashamed,,” Beth said Y/n hadn’t even noticed the lioness was in the changing room. “You're gonna get used to it, you are just a teen, when you grow old you’ll just realize it’s a part of you.”

Y/n smiled, feeling more at ease. Maybe she wouldn't throw herself into traffic after all” :)

“This conversation reminds me of  when I got my first period, I was so embarrassed,” Leah said, holding the bridge of her nose. “I was 14 training on the pitch with the Arsenal youth team when the head coach blew the whistle and asked very loudly if I had gotten hurt because there was blood running down my leg.”

“I just put the ball down and ran to the locker room,” Leah said laughing. “Then Maureen, the assistant coach, came down to talk to me and handed me these big pads and asked me if It was my first period.”

“Oh my first period was during the Matildas Under 15 tournament,” Kyra said. “I had just turned 14, but my mum made me carry a bag of tampons and stuff like that everywhere, so the first time it happened I just went to the toilet and told my friends about it. 

Then every girl shared some funny, and not so funny period story, which made Y/n feel calmer. 

Y/n would get along with the Gunners; she knew it.

[aziawow]

now that we're here... (benny weir x f!reader) nsfw, 6.6k words

summary: in the heat of the moment, you and benny sleep together. you don't even kiss. a devilish plot (and teenage awkwardness) keeps you from talking to him about that night. the solution, however, might just be part of the very thing you're avoiding.

warnings: nsfw, loss of virginity, unprotected sex (DO NOT EVER HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX!!! USE A CONDOM EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!), implied reader isn't a virgin, blood, language, devil mention, implied animal abuse, death (of ocs), panic attack. if there are any other warnings please let me know so i can add

notes: no use of y/n, she/her reader, can also double as a rory x platonic!reader bc they're such besties. this fic is so fun pls give it a read!

You’re not entirely sure how it happens. Seriously. Yes, you’re super ultra mega attracted to Benny, but you never expected this to happen, especially as suddenly as it did. 

You’re a planner, extremely detail oriented, and you’re almost never taken by surprise. Impulsivity isn’t you, it’s Benny. So what made you throw caution into the wind and do this? 

You’re not even together; you didn’t even kiss. 

Suffice to say, you’re freaking the fuck out. 

***

You and Benny are chilling together, watching a movie on his bed. It’s rare for you two to be alone, but Ethan had to help his parents with whatever, Rory was doing whatever Rory does, and Sarah and Erica were having fun in town. They invited you, but with the supernatural craziness of the last few days, you just wanted a quiet night in for once. 

Years of familiarity resulted in you and Benny being pretty comfortable with each other, so you were cuddled together, you mostly on top of Benny while you both made fun of the movie and stuffed your faces with popcorn. 

You think it happens because you got thirsty. 

One second you’re reaching across Benny to grab your drink, then another has Benny hissing through his teeth and grabbing you. He held you still, and you glanced up. 

His eyes were squeezed shut, and a peculiar red flush adorned his face. His breathing was quickened, and he was practically shaking. 

Startled by his behavior, you sat up, still half on his lap and completely oblivious. 

“Benny, what’s wrong?” You place the back of your hand on his cheek, thinking he might have a temperature. Hot, but not feverish. You scoot forward a little to reach his forehead, and Benny gasps. 

“Please,” he strains, “stop moving.” 

Your eyebrows knit together. He was making no sense. “What…”

Then, you feel it. 

Your leg was brushing against his very prominent, very hard, erection. 

“Oh,” you gulp.

Benny’s eyes spring open, his mouth starts to move, but he can’t seem to say anything. You know he’d try to shrug this off, tell you it’ll go away, and apologize to lessen the sheer awkwardness of the moment. 

You don’t want him to. 

His lips are parted, panting quietly, face blushing the prettiest red you’ve ever seen, skin sheening with sweat, and his eyes? One part horrified and the other completely and utterly aroused. 

You really don’t want to waste this moment. 

Without thinking, you place a hand on his upper thigh. Firm enough to not get lost in translation but gentle so he could brush you away if he didn’t want this after all.

Your eyes meet, confusion and hope and desperation swimming in his. Slowly, you slide your hand upward, waiting for him to swat you away. 

He doesn’t. 

When you reach his front, you apply pressure and palm him through his pants. 

Benny groans delectably, and his eyes roll to the back of his head. 

You can feel yourself get wet at his reaction, the burn between your legs throbbing as the seconds pass. The fact that one little touch from you elicits a response like this makes your veins rush with power. 

Then, he moans your name. 

You’re done playing. You unzip his jeans and push them down. Benny, who has all but collapsed on his pillows, eagerly helps you slip the rest of it off. 

You climb on him again, fully this time, and take him into your hands. You pump him a few times, having to wet your hands with your spit. He’s shaking under you, making these small pathetic noises that have you grinding on his thigh. 

He’s lasting for a lot longer than you expect a teenage boy to, especially a virgin. 

Benny surprises you yet again by sitting up abruptly, and you let him go. He takes his shirt off, and when it’s discarded somewhere on his messy floor, he presses your foreheads together, mouths breathing into each other but not quite touching. 

His hands play with the hem of your shirt.

“Benny,” you moan, when his fingers disappear under the fabric and press against your hot skin. 

“Can I take this off?” He asks, throat raspy and deep. You nod at him, and your top joins his on the floor before you can blink.

Your hands roam each other’s bodies, just feeling and squeezing. Benny nuzzles your neck and collarbones, pressing kisses and leaving nips here and there. You grip his hair and pull, feeling the whine of pleasure Benny lets out against your skin.

After a few moments of this, you realize Benny is nearly naked, and you still have your pants on. You pull away from him and sit up higher on your knees. When Benny realizes your next course of action, he wastes no time in helping you rid yourself from your pants, and when they’re gone, he grabs a handful of your ass and blinks up at you, wide and ready. 

You reach behind your back and unhook your bra, peeling it off slowly, almost painfully so, for Benny. You toss it aside, and all he can do is stare. 

You reach for his hands and place them on your breasts. When he starts to feel you up and squeeze, you throw your head back and keen at the sensation. 

“Fuck,” you gasp. You look down at Benny, and he’s peering up at you through his dark lashes with nothing but want behind his eyes. Instinctively, you pull his head to your chest, and your pleasure multiplies when Benny immediately starts licking and sucking and kissing you all over. 

Your legs are delightfully weak at this point, so you push Benny back down on the sheets and fall on top of him. You’re still touching each other and it feels like he’s become a second skin. You hardly register his hand going further down until it rests on your lower abdomen, toying with your panty line.

“Can I touch you?” he all but pleads, and who were you to deny him? 

You’re nearly sobbing when he slips his fingers into your folds, feeling the wetness he caused. You can tell he’s trying to finger your clit, so you decide to be a good partner and guide him to its location. You shudder when he finally finds it on his own and begins to rub, the friction nearly too much for you. 

You’re kissing and biting his skin, one hand gripping his sheets and the other skimming along his chest, your nails scratching and digging into him. You grind back on his hand, so he picks up the pace and you know right then you’re about to cum. 

“Benny,” you warn. “Benny, don’t stop.” 

He doesn’t, and you cry into his neck when you orgasm on his fingers. 

You both lay there panting, but you have no time to bask in the afterglow when you remember he hasn’t came yet. 

You get on your hands and knees above Benny, and you lower your face to his, still not touching except your hair brushing his. 

“Do you want me?” you ask. You want him. You want him so bad you don’t know what you’d do if he said no. 

He nods, and your heart flutters. 

“No,” you whisper. “I need to hear you say it.”

He nods again. “Yes. Yes I do. Please,” he begs. He starts to babble his affirmation and continues to do so when you get your underwear and his boxers off. You grip him and slick his head up with your juices, and when you finally sink down, Benny shuts up and you both sigh as you seat him fully inside you. 

You start to rock, fucking yourself with his cock and feeling so, so good. Benny’s hands find your hips and together, you find a pace as you ride him. Your hands are on his chest as you slide up and down on him. He begins to feel you again, your torso, your breasts, shoulders, and hair. You don’t want him to stop exactly, because it makes the pleasure increase tenfold, but you’re in control, and it's so hot when Benny does what you want. 

You grab his wrist and pin them on either side of his head, and the flash of lust in his eyes as you do so makes you smirk. 

You keep holding him down as you pump in and out of him, as you rock against him, but after a while your legs begin to ache. Benny, feeling you slow down, takes the reins. 

You let him go, and he wraps an arm around your body, pulling you down flush against him. The other hand weaves through your hair, angling your head once more into the crook of his neck. Holding you tight, he fucks up into you, and you feel something you never have before. 

For a virgin, he’s a natural at this. Your bodies know what they want and how to get it, the carnal desire guiding you the whole way. You can feel him pulse inside you, and you know you’re both about to cum when his thrusts grow quicker. 

“Benny,” you moan into his ear, and that’s all it takes. His motions get sloppier as he climaxes, but you don’t care because you’re in the middle of coming yourself. 

You’re laying there, trying to catch your breath and clinging together tightly. He’s practically hugging you, and you're running your fingers through his hair. 

You know you can’t stay like this forever, so you pull off of him, both of you wincing as you do so. You want to find your clothes and dash, but your legs wobble and you fall back down on him. 

You expected Benny to crack a joke like he always does, but when you turn around, he has an arm thrown over his eyes. His chest rises and falls quickly, and you wonder if you should risk it and leave after all. 

But then, Benny wraps an arm around you, much gentler this time. “Good night,” he says softly, and he’s out. 

You’re actually grateful Benny doesn’t seem to be aware of aftercare, because you have no idea what to do, and would have even less of an idea if he stayed awake and wanted to talk about what just happened. 

You’re contemplating whether to stay or go, and when you finally decide, your eyes slip shut, and you cuddle into Benny’s warmth. 

The next morning, you have a proper freak out. 

You need to talk to him, you need to not talk to him. You need caffeine and a pregnancy test and a change of clothes. You need an ice pack and a salt bath because holy fuck you’re sore, Jesus Christ Benny. 

You need Sarah and Erica. 

Luck is on your side today, because as you make your way into school, there’s no sign of Benny. You find who you need chatting at Sarah’s locker, and when Erica sees you, she immediately asks what’s wrong. 

“Oh my god, I don’t even know where to start,” you choke. They blink at you and you start to ramble. “I did something so stupid last night, But it also wasn’t stupid except for the parts that were but ohmygod I need to tell you something. It cannot wait and I am freaking out.” You pause to take a breath. “I think my heart is about to give out.” 

“Okay, okay relax,” Sarah calms you down. “We have 20 minutes before first period. What’s up?” 

“Hold that thought, Sarah, I think she needs to sit down.” You nod, so the girls take you to a more private area, which turns out to be an empty classroom, and as soon as you get there you crumple onto the nearest chair.

“So… what's up?” 

You sit up, your whole body jittering with nerves. You wanna tell them so bad but you don't know how. This is a kind of confession that needs a strong lead to get there, but you’re totally blanking. 

“Well?” 

It burst out of you, “Benny and I slept together!” 

Neither girl moved. They stood there, gaping like fish. You knew they believed you, this isn't something you'd lie or joke about. Oh how you wish you were. 

“How?” Erica finally spoke.

You grimace. “Well, it was kind of an accident at first. We were just watching a movie, then we got really horny at the same time, and it just went from there.”

Sarah’s face twisted at your words. “Were you at least safe?” 

You pinched your lips together and avoided their gaze. 

Sarah groaned and Erica exclaimed, “Are you serious? That was so stupid!”

“I told you I did something stupid! I wasn’t really thinking about protection in the heat of the moment and I seriously doubt Benny had a condom laying around.” You stop then. “Oh my god. I took Benny’s virginity.”

At your words, Sarah and Erica looked at each other. “Ewww!”

“You did what?” a voice shouted from the previously closed door. 

Rory. 

Son of a bitch. 

Erica pulled him into the room and slammed the door shut. You’ve never been more thankful for her as she began to threaten Rory within an inch of his undead life. You expected him to wet himself, but Rory’s face was calm, and not the kind of blankness you’re accustomed to seeing on his expression.

He huffed. “No wonder Benny was being so weird this morning. I thought losing your virginity was supposed to change a guy in a good way. His face looked exactly like the time I accidentally dropped him in a dumpster.”

That… did not do anything good for your ego. 

“He hates me,” you pout. 

“I don't know about that,” Rory shrugs. “He asked if I saw you and told me to tell him if I did. Oh, well now that I’ve seen you, I should probably go tell him.” Rory started to walk away, but the three of you shouted after him and dragged him back. 

“Okay, jeez. I don’t get what the big deal is.”

Erica facepalmed and Sarah scoffed. “The big deal is that two close friends slept with each other. That’s not a thing friends do! It’s probably awkward for them!”

You sigh. “Guys, it’s more than awkward. We didn’t even talk about it. I left before he woke up.”

Erica gasps, “You did not.” Sarah and Rory both wince, and again, this did not make you feel better. 

“What was I supposed to say! It happened so suddenly—we didn’t even kiss!” 

The three of them pause and gawk at you. You threw your hands up in surrender. 

“It just didn’t happen. We were kinda focused on other things.” You were pulled back to the memory, his lips and hands everywhere, his whiny little mewls and pants hot and breathy in your ear… 

“Oh my god. She’s thinking about him right now, ewww!” Erica squealed.

“Wait, was Benny actually good?” Sarah asked in disbelief. 

You sigh dreamily, “Let's just say, if he wasn't already a spellcaster, he'd still have magic in his fingers.”

“EWWW!” Three voices cried in unison. Rory gagged and Erica covered her ears. Sarah closed her eyes, her worn expression letting you know she very much regretted asking at all. All three looked rather like a steak to the heart would be a perfect end to this conversation. 

The end, however, came in the form of the warning bell. Before leaving you swore all of them to secrecy, with an emphasis on Rory’s discretion. He gave you a thumbs up and said “You can count on me!” You were not confident in his ability to keep his mouth shut. 

Classes went on, but you were on edge in fourth period, the first class of three you and Benny shared, not including lunch. You got there early, as usual, and Benny came in second before the bell, also as usual. You didn’t dare look up at him when he walked by you, knowing it was him by his clumsy footsteps and the scent of his cologne. He sat behind you, and you felt the weight of his stare on you the entire class period. When the bell finally rang you were first out the door. 

Your whole group usually sits together at lunch, unless the dorks had a mathlete meeting or Erica decided to sit with her boytoy of the week, which happens more often than not. She promised to sit with you and Sarah today just in case a buffer (or a badass vampire) was needed. 

Rory is the first of the boys to sit down and starts yammering about his day. Apparently the stray cat he feeds in the junkyard went missing and it’s been days since he saw it and he’s getting worried. He was in the middle of the “epic” tale of their friendship and why they don’t try to eat each other anymore when Benny sits down. Right in front of you. Where he always does. Very normal, but you can’t ignore the shaking feeling that no, everything is decidedly not normal. 

Unfortunately for all of you, Rory trails off. 

The table is silent for a long, long while.

You want to say something so bad, you hate this awkward tension between the two of you, but you can’t speak. It’s like your voice was stolen by teenage embarrassment. 

You have enough strength of mind to meet Benny’s eyes, only you’re unable to read him. Is he disgusted? Regretful? If so, of what specifically? Is your friendship completely over? He just looks and looks. 

Just as a headache began to form between your eyes, Ethan barrelled into his seat in an anxious flurry. You’ve never been happier to hear the words: “Guys, I think we have a problem.” 

Your focus is 100% on Ethan now, you don’t even notice the pinch of Benny’s brows at his best friend's words, or the way his fingers twitch for his spellbook, or the way he licks his lips like he always does when he concentrates. 

It’s Benny, of course you can’t help but notice. 

Except, something Ethan just said actually pulled your focus. “Wait, you said you saw strange markings in your vision. Was there anything concrete? It sounds like whoever drew them and left the animal hearts and talismans were attempting a ritual.”

Ethan nods. “There were pentagrams all over my vision, and there was a flash of goat hooves and a clock.”

“A clock?” Benny asks. 

“Yes,” he confirms. “The hands were set to midnight.” 

“The witching hour,” you and Benny speak in unison. You snuck a peek at him, almost startling when you see he did the same. You dart your eyes away, and a sinking feeling hits you as you realize what Ethan’s vision most likely meant.

“Rory,“ you start slowly, “what color is your junkyard cat?”

Your friends tense as you say this, also connecting the dots. Rory, bless him, remains oblivious. 

“He has black fur! That's why I named him Shadow Ninja! I hope the little guy is okay…” Rory digs into his sandwich, and you don’t know if he’s being willfully ignorant to spare his own feelings, or if he genuinely knows nothing about superstitions. The group glances at each other, all silently agreeing to keep Rory in the dark. 

“We need to find out who’s behind these rituals. It’s one thing if they’re idiotic humans, but another if they’re witches,” Sarah comments. 

“What do they even want?” Erica asks. “What are the rituals for?”

“Well, if Ethan’s visions and the ritual’s remnants are anything to go by,” you muse darkly, “I’d guess they’re trying to summon the Devil.”

Benny hums. “Making a deal with the Devil is not good, Grandma says that all time. We need to find out for sure where the rituals took place.”

He begins to flip through his spellbook when Ethan asks why the location matters. 

Then, it hits you. “Ley lines.”

“Exactly,” Benny confirms, but he doesn’t look at you. “If they’re doing the rituals on the ley line, it’ll be easier to find out where they’ll go next.”

Sarah puts a hand on your arm. “Hold on, what are ley lines?”

“They’re invisible, mystical energy lines that run underneath the earth. They connect various historical sites, prominent landmarks, and sacred spaces to conduct the energy. They’re said to amplify the supernatural, so it makes sense if there’s one running through Whitechapel.”

“There is,” Benny says. He flips the book around and shows everyone the page he found. It details the line running through your province of Canada, but there isn’t anything you recognize. The map isn’t updated for the 21st Century, apparently. 

You make plans after school to go ley line hunting, deciding to split into three pairs to cover more ground, one vampire and one human in each. Out of everyone, you have the most success at keeping Rory on task, so you’re partnered with him. His protective side comes out most often with you, being the only fully fledged human of the group, no vamp, seer, or spellcaster powers in sight. 

You can fend for yourself of course, though you find fighting magic with magic more often than not solves the problem. It’s no bother to you when you have brains. You help Ethan make the plans and connect the dots, you don’t need to execute them. 

Admittedly, the idea of summoning the Devil scares the shit out of you, it also helps take your mind off of the Benny issue you’re facing. 

You and Rory have been searching for an hour and a half (with you only needing to pull Rory back on task three times) when you realize the section of the map took you to a familiar house in the rich part of town. 

“Rory,” you get his attention. “Isn’t this Jesse’s mansion?” He, briefly serving time in Jesse’s cult, frequented this house more often than that one time you paid an unwanted visit, would know for sure. 

“Oh hey. Yeah, it is.”

The mansion looks different than the last time you saw it. After Jesse’s imprisonment in the cubile animus, the place remained abandoned; and no one, not even the HOA, dared to mess with what he left behind. 

The lawn was overgrown, leaves and vines creeping up and curling around the corners and windows. The siding was darkened with dirt and grime, and some of the shillings had fallen off, leaving a gaping spot where it once lay. 

“Does the magic line go through the house?” Rory questions.

According to the map, it did, but you had a feeling it wasn’t this easy. 

“We need to get in and check it out. Something doesn’t feel right.” 

Rory walks up to the gate and pushes it open, the hinges squeaking and built up rust grinding as it opens. The two of you approach the former vampire den cautiously, the brick driveway filled with green in its cracks and all kinds of foliage strewn over the walkway left by wind and storms. 

Once inside the house, you shudder. It might've been abandoned, but the air felt dark and tainted still. 

“Hey,” Rory called from where he ventured further in, “I’m not sure this place is as abandoned as we think.” 

He’s right. In the corner of the living room, messy sleeping bags and junk food wrappers littered the entire space. There were school bags tossed haphazardly on a table, and books on every available space possible. 

You made your way to the kitchen area, where there was more discarded food, spilled liquid, and even more books. On the dining table, dried blood, a variety of talismans, melted candles, and ashes lay within a pentagram.

You made your way to the island, which was clear of everything except one book in the center.

Rory came up next to you and pointed. “I know this book. It has Jesse’s prophecy in it.”

You skimmed the book, and Rory stopped you on the page about the prophecy. You scanned the page, and when you saw a familiar line, you read it aloud: “The dead take root, the barren orchard bears the devil's fruit.’” You pause. “Rory, check the map. I think the ley line runs under Ethan’s house, specifically the tree in his backyard. They tried the ritual here, and it didn’t work. The other failed rituals happened at the church, the cemetery, and the stump of Whitechapel’s oldest tree. If they found this book, it won’t take them long to figure out their next spot, and I think it might actually work this time around. I mean, symbolically, it seems like the place to catch the Devil's attention.”

Rory’s eyes widened. “Woah. This is getting kinda scary.”

“I agree, we should get out of here before they get back.”

You start toward the door, but Rory stops you. His face twists regretfully as he responds, “Too late. I can hear them outside.”

His words make your blood run cold, and you hear the creak of the front door opening. 

As quickly and quietly as you can, you and Rory squeeze inside the empty walk-in pantry. You’re easing the door shut as the kitchen door slams open. 

“I’m telling you, that geek is onto us. He’s a seer, right? I bumped into him before lunch and I swear he saw something,” a husky, feminine voice said. Through the panes on the door, you can make out a silhouette of her, but nothing too clear. 

A hand slaps the counter. “Why does it matter?” Deep, male, and insanely grating. You can see his hulking frame lean on the island. “He might be shacking up with vampires, but they’re not invincible. They can’t stop us no matter what they know.”

Behind you, Rory murmurs, “I know them from somewhere.”

The first one sighs, apparently not hearing a peep even from a few feet away. “I guess, but his friends are vampires. The small one, Sarah, babysits him on Friday’s right?”

“Yup. But, with some garlic and a sharp wooden steak, it shouldn’t be too hard to negotiate for that virgin’s blood. And he doesn’t even need to die!”

“That we know of. The instructions say the blood of a virgin, who’s to say that doesn’t mean the life of one? The 17th century assholes who wrote it down weren’t very specific with the recipe.”

“And the awful fucking poetry. I could’ve done without that,” the guy scoffs. 

“Whatever,” the girl snaps. “We will do it tomorrow night after his parents leave. We get what we want and hey, maybe once the Devil himself turns us into vampires, we’ll kill the virgin anyway. I hear they taste the best.”

The two cackle, and their voices dim as they clomp away. 

You and Rory tip toe out of the pantry, keeping an eye on the door as you walk. The thing is, you’re not completely aware of your surroundings. In a stroke of bad luck, you trip on a stack of books, and they clutter noisily to the ground. 

You meet Rory’s eyes, horrified. 

“Who’s there?” the guy shouts. You hear the stomp of their boots getting closer, and Rory tugs you away to the other door and up the stairs. You follow him like you’re on autopilot, everything you heard and what’s happened catching up to you at the wrong time. 

You’re being pulled up another set of stairs and Rory kicks the bedroom door open. 

“This one has a balcony. Gord pushed me off it when I was learning how to fly.”

“What a dick,” you mutter and suddenly you’re gasping in the cool outside air. 

Rory grabs onto you right as the door flies open, the two satanists rushing forward. Not a second too soon, Rory takes off. 

A few minutes and half a heart attack later, you land on the designated meeting point, which was, of course, Ethan’s front porch. Everyone was there already, and you felt comfortable enough to have a panic attack. 

You’re still gasping and your legs give out on you. You’re caught by familiar arms, and Benny lowers you down to the porch chair.

“We—we found—the book. The lines—the tree, it just. They’re going to attack you! Take your, your blood. They wanna turn. They need him to turn.”

You’re not making a lick of sense to anyone, and Sarah starts to rub your back. 

“Breathe,” she says softly. She doesn't have the compulsion ability mastered, but you want to listen to her, so you do. 

“You found something? What happened?” Ethan asks. 

“Dude,” Benny chastises. “Maybe wait til she stops freaking out? Rory, what’s going on?”

Rory explains your findings as best he can, and you use the lilt of his voice to calm down. “The guy and the girl look so familiar. I can’t place it, though.”

With a huff, Erica reminds him, “They go to our school, genius, obviously they’ll be familiar.”

Rory starts to protest, “Yeah but, that’s not where I recognize them from.”

“Vampires,” you finally say. Everyone stops and stares at you. “The deal they want to make with the Devil is to become vampires. Why would they go to all this trouble when this town is crawling with them? I think it’s because they literally can’t. Vampires won’t turn them.” You twist your body to face Sarah and Erica. “Does the Council have some kind of banned humans list? Like, “Do not turn these people under the penalty of death” list?”

Sarah hums and furrows her brows together in thought. “I’m sure they do, I’ll go check,” and she vamp speeds away. 

“It’s the only reason I can think of. Anyone else have a theory?”

You look up from your place on the chair, and everyone (again) is staring. 

“That,” Benny declares, “was incredible.”

You meet his gaze, and for the first time since last night, it doesn’t feel weird. It feels… normal. Right. 

You smile at him shyly, and think yeah, you’ll be alright. 

A nudge to your side has your attention on Erica. Apparently she caught that little exchange. She quirks a playful eyebrow at you and you shrug your shoulders innocently. 

After that, it doesn't take too long for Sarah to return in a whoosh of air. “They do have a list! And it comes with pictures. Here,” she hands everyone a stack. Thankfully, it’s not too big. It only takes a few seconds before Rory spots them. 

Ethan nods. “Yup. I ran into her this morning and that’s when I got the vision. She didn’t seem too pleased with me.”

Now that you have all the pieces, you plan. 

A pizza is ordered and you all gather around Ethan’s dining table.

“These people know way too much about us, so what if we give them more?” Ethan suggests. 

You hum in agreement. You reach for a slice, and your hand brushes Benny’s. You lock eyes over the table, and he’s flushing that sweet red again. He retracts his hand, and you grin to yourself as you take the slice. 

“Like what?” Erica asks. 

“They think the ball is in their corner, right?” you explain. “So what if we change it up? Make them comfortable, make it even more easy for their plan to unfold, but what they don’t know is that we’re doing the same thing, only better.”

“Okay,” Rory remarks, voice laced with confusion. “What do we do?”

You and Ethan share a near manic smirk. 

“We’re gonna set a trap. Tomorrow, I will very loudly say in front of them that I’m Jane’s babysitter tonight instead of Sarah. That gets rid of one vampire, they think ambushing us will be a walk in the park if it’s me.” 

“Tomorrow night, you three,” Ethan informs Sarah, Erica, and Rory, “will be waiting in the shadows, ready to attack when necessary.” 

You take a deep breath. “Benny, you need to be with us.” 

Ethan startles. “What, why?”

You ignore him. 

“Benny, do you trust me?”

Instantly, he says yes. 

“Good,” you breathe. “You need to be the sacrifice.” 

Ethan protests immediately, and the others look at you like you’ve grown a second head. 

“Um, they need a virgin for the ritual, right?” Erica speaks up, deliberately slow as if you somehow forgot you were the one to change Benny’s virginal status. 

“Yes,” you confirm, and as subtly as you can, you explain. “They need a virgin to complete the ritual.”

You can see the moment it clicks for Sarah and Erica; unfortunately, Rory is more vocal with his understanding. 

“Ohhh, is it because Benny—YEOUCH!” He yells as Erica elbows him particularly hard in the side. 

Ethan’s eyes dart between all of you. “Uh, okay. Whatever. As long as it isn’t Jane, I don’t care who gives up their blood.”

The next day at school, you get the wannabe vampires hook, line, and sinker when you bring up your status as tonight's babysitter right in front of them. Unbeknownst to them, Jane is going to be safe next door with Benny’s grandma the second their parents leave for date night.

It takes a few hours for the “ambush” to happen, just minutes before midnight. You have fun pretending to act scared and whine when they tie you up, though you could’ve gone without the grass stains as the burly guy tossed you next to the tree. 

They make quick work of setting up the ritual, and hey, there's Shadow Ninja! Anger flares in you at the sight of Rory's friend tied up and muzzled like that.

When it’s all set up, they mix together what looks like the world’s most disgusting cocktail in a gold chalice. 

“Now,” the girl announces as the two stalk up to you, Benny, and Ethan. “Who will it be?” 

“We were gonna do mega geek over there,” the guy said, nodding toward Ethan, but then he points to you. “But what about her?” he asks his friend. 

The girl, the absolute bitch, throws her head back and laughs. “Her? Are you kidding? She’s a slut, no way am I drinking her blood. We need a virgin, not some high school whore, remember?” 

Your mouth drops open, “Well fuck you too! At least I got hot while I was still in high school. You wanna be eternally 17? I feel sorry you need a do-over when some of us got it the first time around.” That might not have been the best response, you think as she backhands you across the face, but it felt damn good to say. 

“Leave her alone,” Benny growls, eyes flaring, and wow, that’s hot. “Do not talk about her like that, I swear to god.”

The guy taunts Benny. “Oooh I think lover boy here just offered himself up! Gimme your arm, nerd.”

They aren’t gentle as they take Benny’s blood. You send them death glares every time he winces and hope this ridiculous ordeal is over soon.

You watch as they mix the blood into the chalice. They chant in terrible latin, and finally, they drink, draining the cup dry.

The air is still as you wait for a long moment.

Suddenly, they’re both doubled over in pain, clutching all over their bodies and heads, screaming so forcefully the veins in their forehead pop out. 

“We’re sorry!” the girl shrieks. “We don’t know what happened!”

The guy falls to his knees. “We didn’t mean to insult you—we did everything right, we promise!” 

“What do you mean,” the girl wails, and she spits up black. You realized then that someone must be talking to them in their heads. Him, possibly? 

The guy is shaking on the ground; he has the same black liquid spilling out of his mouth, and you know then that it’s blood. His eyes lock on Benny, and he began to crawl toward him.

“You!” is all he can gurgle out before he disappears in an ashy poof. The girl gives an ear shattering shrill, and a second later, she’s gone too. 

Sarah, Erica, and Rory emerge from their hiding place, instantly moving to free the rest of you from your bonds. 

“What just happened?” Ethan sputters. He didn’t expect that. What the fuck. 

“They messed up the ritual,” you smile. 

Ethan frowns. “Really? I don't see how.” 

Rory laughs and puts an arm around Ethan’s shoulder. 

“It’s because Benny took a trip to Bonetown,” he snickers, and you punch him in the shoulder as hard as you can. 

Rory makes an offended face at you. “Ouch! What was that for? I was just answering Ethan’s question.”

“Rory,”  You speak calmly, eyes closed. “Shut. Up.”

“What! We should all be thanking you! I mean, if it wasn’t for you, they totally would’ve summoned the Devil. Unless they chose Ethan instead but—”

“Rory, look! There's Shadow Ninja!”

The blond vampire squeals and tears off toward the tree, freeing his very much alive, but incredibly pissed off, feline friend. 

Only, the damage is done. 

You seek out Sarah and Erica, but they just shrug and chuckle awkwardly at you before vamping away. Rory, once he comes back with the squirming cat in his arms, senses the sudden tension he unwittingly created, and after a few seconds of deliberation decides the smartest move is to do the same. Jerks, all of them. 

You really, really wish Ethan wasn’t as clever as he is. You know the instant the explanation dawns on him. His mouth drops wide open and he points to Benny, who gives him an awkward smile. Then Ethan points the accusatory finger at you, and all you can do is pinch your lips together and watch him freak out.

“You—but how—why didn't you say—but that means—you exploded them with sex?”

He shakes his head and spins around, walking away to fetch Jane and muttering to himself like mad. Poor guy.

You and Benny are the only ones left of your ragtag group still lingering, so you walk to his house, and when you reach the steps, you can’t take it anymore. You blurt:

“We didn’t even kiss.” Benny stares at his shoes and bites the inside of his cheek. “We didn’t, so I didn’t know if you actually liked me or not. It was good, it was so fucking good. I should've stayed. I wasn’t thinking when I left the other day. I hate the morning after talk but you deserved so much better than what I gave you. I’m sorry. I like you Benny, I really do and I want to make this work.” You keep rambling, just saying what comes to mind and you’re still rambling when Benny cups your face in both his hands and pulls you into a blessedly mind numbing kiss. 

It’s everything you ever wanted. It's soft and sweet, yet firm and demanding, just like Benny. Your mouths move together skillfully, slotting together like they were made for it, and you’d like nothing more than to kiss him until you can’t breathe any longer. 

He pulls back slightly, lingering in your space, breathing in your air. 

“If I invite you in, will you stay this time?” 

You don't have to think. 

“Yes.” 

[jd-loves-fiction]

Coming back to you with another request cuz I loved your previous work

Boothill, Welt, Ratio, Jing Yuan and Gallagher with the same platonic teen reader premise but reader calls them ,,Dad" on accident and they themselves don't even notice it because it comes so naturally to them

🌑so glad you liked it🥺🥺also the dad's of all time yes yes!! Also my internet has been fucked lately that's why uploads are slow sowy 🥺

✦ 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 ✦

If you look at his lore, he was actually a dad (😭 my Shayla) so yeah big chance he won't notice at all

Because of the trauma associated with his family in general, he'll notice it eventually and be a bit conflicted

On one hand, he's absolutely delighted at the fact that despite being almost entirely made of metal, you are still able to find such fundamentally human comfort within him

And on the other hand, he has a hard time accepting that the man he was before didn't actually die along with most of his body

He won't ever correct you tho, at the end of the day he's just grateful that he's still able to make young folk feel safe around him

Reminds him that he's still human🥺

✦ 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐭 ✦

Did you see the way he basically adopted Sunday the moment he stepped on the express?? Yeah, that's dad right there

He basically adopts every kid (as in, anyone younger than him) that steps aboard the express, so i feel like someone else might've already called him before and he just brushed it off

Same with you, though in his heart he's over the moon

All he wants in life is to make everyone around him feel safe and loved, so to know that you of all people seem to think of him in such a way really warms his heart

Though he'll never point it out in fear of making you embarrassed

He's overjoyed!! But internally :)

✦ 𝐃𝐫. 𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨 ✦

Truly baffled, at first

He's aware of his reputation and he doesn't mind it but he never expected someone to him that way

Though he's (not so) secretly very pleased

At his core, he's a teacher and that's what he loves to do - spread knowledge to all who seek it

And I'm sorry for reminding you of this but most of us have called our teacher mom/dad before so...

There's a slight chance it's happened before... also a slight chance he very dryly corrected them - "last time i checked i have no children" 🙄

Might do the same to you unless he's in one of his moods, writing down information or just lost in thought - then he'll probably just wave you away wordlessly

I feel like he understands on a behavioral level why you did it and because of it, wont comment on it or bring it up again. It's just something people do sometimes, nothing weird about it

The most neutral out of all of them but will make a mental note about how it probably means you trust him at least a little

When he lets himself be selfish and overthink it, it does warm his heart but you'll never know

✦ 𝐉𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐮𝐚𝐧 ✦

Actual father to Yanqing YOU CANT CHANGE MY MIND!!

Ooooh he's tearing his hair out trying not to tease you about it

He knows that if he does you'll crawl back in your shell again and thats tHEEE last thing he wants in life, really

It's easy to feel comfortable around him, i feel. He's just a big lazy cat - pretty independent and chill

He's good at just being there when you need him there as well as talking your ear off as a distraction - peak comfort

Definately called Jingliu 'mom' as a kid, come on

And Yanqing did the same with him

So it doesnt surprise him much since he understands its a pretty normal thing but GOOOOD he wants to acknowledge it so BAAADD

HE WANTS TO MAKE IT SILLY BUT NOOOOO 😭

He's an adult now (a very old one at that) so he understands that now is NOT the time

Will keep thinking back on it fondly tho :))

✦ 𝐆𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐫 ✦

Oh oh my... he gives so much deadbeat dad I'm getting nostalgic IM KIDDING

Anyway, as a bartender, i feel like thats happened to him before

People say weird shit when they're drunk so it's very likely someone's called him dad before

Though that feels very different to him

When people do that when drunk it doesn't usually mean anything - he must just remind them of their father (for good or bad) so he doesn't take it too seriously

But you? Oh he's taking it seriously

Ego? Inflated to hell and back

He's being extra sweet and caring with you

Making sure you eat and rest, etc

Gotta live up to his reputation 😉

The dad who stepped up fr

Might tease you about it, but if you have an adverse reaction he'll stop immediately

Very touched that you think of him that way even subconsciously and will try to make sure he doesn't disappoint :)

[petew21-blog]

Bad dog

"No! Bad! Bad dog... bad boy!" jesus, now he's drinking water from the puddle. If anybody sees this I don't know how I'm gonna be explaining this

You see. The guy drinking from the puddle is... my bestfriend Finn. We have been the best mates since forever. I have been in love with him platonically, but he was definitely straight. I think he knows about me being gay, but he never asked and I never had the guts to tell him.

Today we went to the park. He brought along his dog, Max. Max is the cutest Dobrman I know. Most of the time his is cautious, alert and protecting Finn, but when he is with us, he is enjoying the attention I give him. I always rub him behind his ear, but what he loves the most are belly rubs.

We were just sitting on the ground at the edge of the park. No one in sight. Finn was shirtless, just in his shorts. I was a bit suspicious that he was commando, by the visibility of his bulge. Not like it would mean anything to me. Max was happy as always. Finn was pensive and then kept talking about his new girl crush which I didn't really pay much attention too. Not like he does pay attention to anything I say. He noticed me, not listening and said:"You might as well spend time just with him. You're completely ignoring me today."

"Max here is actually appreciating me and being a great friend. Maybe you two should exchange places." I said jokingly

But out of nowhere. Max dropped down growled and started barking at the two of us. He never did that. I was a bit scared to be honest, but he didn't seem like he would attack us. At the corner of my eye, I also noticed Finn running away from us, dropping down his shorts.

"Where the fuck are you going?! Finn!!! Come back"

He was running around. Completely naked. I looked around, but there were still no people in sight, thankfully. What would they think if they saw him now. What has gotten into him?

Now he got on the ground and grabbed a branch. With his teeth. Has he gone completely mental? Then I realised. That's not possible. I said that as a joke. But when I look at Max, who was now nodding his head, I froze. No way. The really exchanges bodies.

Finn now headed towards the puddle to drink from it. It was funny to see my bestfriend act like a dog, but if I let him keep going, he would hurt his owner's body.

"Bad! Bad dog... bad boy! Stop it!" he stopped, looked at me and ran away from the puddle and headed back to the tree where we sat originally. He must be slowly figuring it out that he is human now. Because he started using his hands as a human would. Swinging from branches and so on. Not like feet.

I ran to him. Grabbed the shorts he took of and tried to get them on him. The best I could do was to get them just above his ankles. He sat down and sticked out his tongue and started hyperventilating. Some manners are harder to let go off, I guess.

"Ok, Max. I know that's you. Do you understand me? Please try to say yes"

"A bark-like noise came out of his throat."

"No, Max. You have to use your voice now. You're a human. Say yes or no. Do you understand?"

After some bad attemps he managed to say:"yy..... yes"

"Good boy. Now. I need you to stop running ok? You are Finn now and Finn wouldn't do that. You have to act like a human now. Ok?"

"No" he answered, but sounded more confident now. He stopped hyperventilating and sat up

"Max. Please don't make this hard for me." as I spoke to Max, I also noticed that Finn has disapeared. Fuck, another problem to solve.

He hesitated and then started speaking:"You want Max. Not Finn. I Finn now"

"No Max. I like both of you. You are his very good dog and he is my very good friend. I love you both and I want you two to be ok."

"I am both now. Good dog and good Finn"

"Max... It's not like that"

"You can rub me like before. On the belly. Please"

Fuck. What the hell do I do? I am horny as fuck to have any experience with Finn, but this feels wrong. So wrong that I was now watching my own body getting closer to Max and rubbing his abs. And by the look in his eyes and now even a smile, I think he likes it. As I was slowly enyoing his well sculpted abs, his dick was getting hard. He definitely noticed, bcause he now tried to get over my leg to hump me.

"No, Max. Stop. Humans do this diferently than dogs. You're human now"

"I saw Finn with a girl many times. I'll do what she did to him." he got over me and unzipped my pants. How the fuck did he get the hang of being a human so soon? He licked his lips and took out my hard dick. I can't believe my wildest dreams are about to become real. He put his lips over the head of my cock and got down. His hand gripping the base of my dick. His other hand got my hand and he squeezed it. Did he just think about that or was this inside Finn's mind? Like some sort of muscle memory. This is amazing. I shot my load really quickly inside of his mouth. I wasn't used to being blowed. Like... ever

He got back on his back and said:"Do me now." I didn't take a second to think about it. I kissed his pecks, my left hand grpping his dick and jerking it. My right carefully protecting his abs form being alone without my touch. I smelled his armpits. He smelled just the way I was used to. I loved his smell. And I could now smell and even lick his hairy armpits. He was welcoming me to do that. Fucking amazing

I started sucking him off. He worked his ass like a pro and kept thrusting into my mouth, his hand in my hair, gripping it. Fucking amazing I tell you. He shot the cum in my mouth and I swallowed it entirely.

I just gave blow job to Finn. I was mesmerized that I looked at Finn and started making ouit with him. He returned the favour and kiss me back. Very passionately.

We were interrupted by the park guard, holding the leash with Max on the other end.

Ok, so we might have a lifelong ban to enter the park, but this day brought us some new experiences. First of all, I got to suck the man of my dreams and now it seems we'll be doing way. Second, Finn probably remembers being a human, but sometimes his animal urges take over. On the way back home he even tried to run after a squirrel. Crazy right?

And third of all, Max really enjoys being human. He really got the hang of it and now is doing an amazing job being Finn. And he is a very romantic boyfriend.

What is weird is his afinity for the Dobrman's. Like today he said he borught one of his friends he knows from the park. He spoke to the dog whole afternoon. But as long as I get to have my new boyfriend, I don't really care

Wait? Do you think they might think about swapping the other dog with someone too? That would be cool, having two great ex-dog friends. Well, depends on who are they gonna choose as the next person.

"Oh, hey Max. What are you...?" and then darkness

[chaos--s]

platonic yandere! couple x reader

context, yandere purge. yans have to send a letter to the darlings they wanna kidnap. @/yanderemommabean for credits because she created the concept.

--

You had been receiving letters from your stalkers.

You took another shaky breath as you stared at the crumpled up pieces of paper that was the letters that was sent by your yanderes. It was eerie and chilling, the way that they wrote about you. In their eyes you were their precious little child, a pure thing that deserved to be saved from a society that sought to corrupt you.

It was disgusting.

You flinched, the sirens were loud and staticky as the message came over.

"This is not a test, this is your Emergency Broadcast System. Announcing the commencement of the annual purge. Commencing at the siren, any and all crime will be legal for 12 continuous hours, May God be with you all. "

The announcement blared through the streets as chaos erupted, the sirens adding to the chaos. You wouldn't be nervous by it usually but this time, it was you that was being hunted. You took your bag and slung it over your shoulders. You didn't want to be another statistic, another darling that fell into the arms of their Yandere.

Now, whatever happens next was your fault. You hadn't prepared for anything like this, you hadn't followed any government-issued tips about how to escape or even how to hide the best way possible. You were about to leave, with a trembling hand you opened the door. Maybe you hadn't heard the footsteps outside your door, or the excitement filled conversation they were having outside.

But they were there.

Right in front of your doorstep, your 'Father' and 'Mother' as they so claimed.

"Oh," She steps forward first, her perfectly manicured hands cups your face, squishing your cheeks together. "Oh you're perfect, aren't they , sweetheart?"

The man that stood behind her was a full head taller than her, towering over both you and the cooing woman. He nodded, a hand resting on her shoulder as he leaned over. You jerked back, the couple's presence are suffocating. God, their letter did them no justice.

They were worse in person.

"G-Get out, right now. I'm not going with you." It was hard to control your voice, you hadn't expected them to come so early so they threw you off guard.

To them, you were just a scared child. They watched as you struggled to grip your metal bat in your hand, trying to defend yourself from them. It just tugged on their heartstrings, it was hard not to just scoop you up into their arms and give you the life that you deserved. Living in this dump was not something that a child of theirs deserved.

"It's alright, honey, you don't have to be scared." The woman started, the same cooing voice that she had as she moved closer to you. Closing the space between you and her, the space that gave you some sense of an upper hand, when both you and her knew that didn't exist.

"We're going to take you home," She took a step closer, you took a step back. "And we're going to make the perfect little family, hm? C'mon, enough playing."

"I'm not fucking playing, go away." You hadn't realized how scared you would be, being face to face with your stalkers. The ones that had been stalking you for literal months, having noted that in the letters. Describing how and when they had decided that you were the perfect addition to their family.

The man that stood behind her who was effectively blocked your only way of escape. It added to the hoplessness of your situation. You glared at them both, your bat still keeping a safe distance between you and your kidnappers.

"P-Please," Your voice was now soft, as you changed your harsh tone. "I-I didn't- I don't want this."

"You don't know what you want, honey. You need your mommy and daddy, and we're here to provide."

She moved to the side, allowing her husband to take control of the situation. His smile soft and paternal as he takes the bat from your hand, his hand envelops yours as he drops the metal bat next to him with a loud clang.

His eyes hadn't left yours. It was loving and adoring, you were truly his child. He scooped you up, carrying you so that your head was laying against his chest.

–

"Why me?"

Your voice was hoarse. You had cried almost the entire way back to their place. 'Our home.' as they kept calling it, it wasn't your home and it never would be. But for now, it was a place you had to be in. Making you change into an expensive pair of pajamas that was your perfect size.

Unsettling. But nonetheless comfortable. Now you were in 'your' bed being tucked in by the woman. She had a soft, maternal smile as she happily tended to you.

"Why not you, sweetheart? You are perfect, a perfect addition."

You could only stare at her. So she was delusional. Picking you of all people to destroy a life. Just because they wanted a kid, when you weren't even a kid.

"Now, I have a little gift for you. So that your room can feel more like yours, c'mon close your eyes." She's giddy now. You look at her  for a brief moment not trusting her.

"Close 'em!" She giggled. You sighed and played into it hoping that she would leave whatever she brought and just left you alone. You hear shuffling before she taps your shoulder.

"Ta daa!" She exclaims. You open your eyes and in her hands she held your favorite stuffed toy. The one that you slept with every night. You took it from her and let out a shaky breath.

"Thanks." You muttered, hugging it to your chest. "Ah, thank you...?"

Just say it. Say it so that she'll leave you alone. Through gritted teeth, you call her what she had been begging you to call her the entire time you were with them. "Thank you, mom."

She gushes, planting a kiss to your forehead. "That's what I like to hear, now go to bed. It's way past your bedtime."

You couldn't get any sleep, even if you were cuddling something that you were familiar with. The room was so eerie, you didn't know if they were watching you through any hidden cameras that were in your room.

So being woken up early in the morning wasn't exactly fun.

You groaned as the curtains to your room was slid open. "Close itttt."

"Nooo, my baby needs to wake upppp." The voice teases. It was deep. A small part of you was grateful it wasn't her. You turn your head to glare at him and he returns your glare with a playful smile.

"It's not good for you to sleep all day." He moves to your bed, too tired to move you watched as he sat next to you. "Up and at 'em, your mom's making breakfast for you, all special for your first day with us."

"Not my mom." You remind him but he agrees with you like you were a petulant child. "Sure, honey. C'mon you must be hungry."

That was true. But you didn't want to give in so you bury your face into your pillows again, tucking yourself deeper into your blanket.

"Alright, you asked for it." You tense not knowing what he meant, then you feel his arms wrap around you and lift you into his arms. You yelped in shock as he cradled you to his chest. You felt more like a baby as he had carried you with your blanket still wrapped around you.

"Aw, how cute. You're truly my baby now, hm?" Fuck no. You start to struggle, his arms pinning you in place.

"Okay!- Okay, I'm sorry let me go. Lemme walk myself, please-"

"Nope, too late. You asked for it." You groaned loudly as he walked down a long hallway and into a giant dining area.

"An eventful morning?" She asks, noticing you bundled up in his arms. You wanted to die then and there.

[thisapplepielife]

Written for @steddie-week.

Long Long Time

Day #3 - Prompt: Mutual Pining | Word Count: 1050 | Rating: T | CW: Language | POV: Steve | Tags: Post S4, Eddie Munson Lives, Idiot 4 Idiot, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication, Platonic Stobin, Robin Knows What's Up

It's not one realization. It's several, over and over again. A steady falling, until he's in so deep, there's just nothing to be done about it. 

"Stop pining, dingus," Robin says, and Steve looks up at her and smiles.

"Impossible," he answers.

"Just tell him," she urges, and he shakes his head. Eddie isn't interested. He's made that pretty clear with the distance he's put between them. 

"Nah, that's not cool. He's getting ready to go," Steve says, "no reason to make it uncomfortable now."

"Dingus. No. Stop it. I can promise you Eddie is pining for you just as hard."

Steve shakes his head. He knows that's not true. Steve's tried all his best moves over the last two years, everything he knows, and has nothing to show for it, except a heart that's maybe not gonna be his anymore.

Steve sits on the floor of Wayne's house, and helps box tapes. Eddie's going. He's really leaving, and soon. 

And Steve's sure that's gonna hurt him for a long, long time. 

"So, what're your big plans for this summer, Harrington?" Eddie asks.

Missing you, Steve thinks, but doesn't say.

"Oh, I don't know. Hang out with Rob, I suppose. Find new jobs. You know we like to change it up every so often. Wreak havoc elsewhere."

Eddie laughs, and it makes Steve smile.

"You could come with me, you know," Eddie offers, but keeps looking down at the box he's packing. "Both of you. All of us."

It's not a real offer, Steve knows that. He knows he's supposed to say no, supposed to let Eddie go, without throwing an anchor around his neck. 

"Oh, you don't want that," Steve rebuffs, and Eddie looks up. "I'll cramp your style."

Eddie laughs, "Yeah, you know me. Party animal."

Steve grins, "You might become one. You won't want me tagging along for that."

"But, what if I do?" Eddie asks, and Steve looks up at him.

"Eddie," Steve says, trying to cut this off before he embarrasses himself.

"You're one of my best friends, and we could have fun together."

They could. Steve knows that's true. But he can't go live in an apartment with Eddie. Can't watch him spread his wings and date, right in front of Steve's face. That'd be too hard.

Even if part of Steve wants to say yes, desperately, just to cling onto anything that's being offered.

But he's trying to be better about that. Trying to grow, and shit.

He can only let his heart get trampled so many times, and he's nearing his limit. He definitely won't be able to survive it happening under Eddie's boot.

"C'mon, Steve. For me."

And that almost does it. He hates to deny anything that Eddie might want, but sometimes, you've got to save yourself first. Put on your own life preserver, then worry about everybody else. Robin's taught him that. Or, has at least tried to.

"I can't."

"Why? Robin? I said she can come, too!"

"Because we don't feel the same way about each other, Eddie!" Steve snaps, and Eddie turns into himself, immediately.

"Oh. Oh shit," Eddie says, "I didn't know you knew. Wow, that's embarrassing," he mutters, and it kind of makes Steve mad. 

"I'm not embarrassed. I can't help who I lov-. Like. Whatever. But I just can't torture myself, man. I want you to be happy, I do. And I'm the wrong guy for making that happen, obviously, so let's just leave it. While we're still friends."

Eddie's nodding, still packing, then he's suddenly frozen in place, "Wait. What? You make me the happiest."

"As a friend," Steve clarifies.

"Well, yeah. But, if you were into it, as more, too."

"Wait. What?" Steve asks, repeating the same thing Eddie had just said. This is gonna turn into Who's on First? if they aren't careful.

"I mean," Eddie says, shying away, "I know you aren't interested like that. But I still want you around."

Steve laughs, fucking cackles, like he's crazy. He feels crazy.

Was Robin right all along? Was Eddie doing the same kind of pining, and Steve just never noticed? Fuck.

They are both goddamn idiots, if that's the case.

"Well, don't laugh," Eddie says, and he sounds dejected.

"Wait, Eddie, hold up," Steve says, crawling across the carpet towards him, putting his hand on Eddie's forearm. "Do we have crossed wires here? Do you like me, like me? Like I like you?'

"You like me?" Eddie asks.

"Uh, yeah," Steve admits, "I have for a while, to be honest."

"Jesus H. Christ, we're idiots," Eddie says, pushing his hand into Steve's hair.

"Dinguses, if you ask Robin," Steve says, smiling, and Eddie's so close he could kiss him. 

Steve thinks he will, and leans in, where Eddie meets him halfway. Kissing him, and it's everything, more than Steve hoped it could ever be.

When Eddie pulls back he's smiling, eyes crinkled at the edges, fucking happy.

He looks thrilled, and Steve decides to go all in. In for a penny, in for a goddamn pound.

"I think I'm gonna love you for a long, long time," Steve whispers in a sing-songy way, because even as happy as Eddie looks right now, Steve's still scared his love won't be wanted.

But Eddie just grins even harder.

"What made you think of that song?" Eddie asks, eyes big and bright, almost shiny.

"You hum it all the time," Steve answers, "under your breath. Like it's soothing."

Eddie wraps his arms around Steve's neck, pulling him tighter. Harder. Closer. They're on their knees, so that kind of hurts, but Steve refuses to let him go as Eddie whispers, "It was my mom's favorite song. She'd sing it to me at night."

"Kind of a sad lullaby," Steve says, and Eddie smiles.

"I was kind of a sad little boy," Eddie admits, and Steve runs his hands up and down Eddie's back.

"Well," Steve says, pressing his lips to Eddie's briefly, "if you'll let me, I'm gonna make sure you're not a sad adult."

Eddie kisses him hard at that, and Steve really will. Even if it takes his whole damn life. 

"I'll definitely let you. For a long, long time," Eddie echoes, the beginnings of a promise.

And Steve will take that deal.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddie-week and follow along with the fun!t

The title is from the Linda Ronstadt song of the same name.

[a-hazbin-reader]

Hii I love your work!

Could you do a (romantic but.. crush stage) headcanon of Alastor helping the reader and the reader gives him a kiss as a thank you and Alastor is like "what the hell was that?" Reader genuinely feeling bad for kissing him and Alastor says "you should be sorry" but then Alastor starts to constantly help the reader (even more than before) and everyone in the hotel knows what he's doing but reader is dense. Then eventually alastor just bursts into her bedroom shouting "FOR FUCK SAKE WHY WONT YOU KISS ME" (maybe not that but same energy)

Please and thank you :>

I'm just gonna...combine these two...

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being jealous, DOORS, Saucy?

Description: ☝️⬆️

You gave affection freely to those around you, everyone got a hug or a small peck on the cheek

So when you're struggling with something and Alastor helps you out? It's only natural for you to give him a quick kiss on the cheek

It's his reaction to it that makes you think you made a mistake in doing so, his body going stiff and gaze dark

You step back as you start to notice a green haze around him and the glass on his monocle cracking

"Don't you ever do that again, my dear."

"I'm-I'm sorry, Alastor-"

"You should be."

And just like that, he's back to normal, carrying on like nothing had happened and humming a jolly tune

But you still feel so guilty for making him so uncomfortable, that was the last thing you wanted

So you work hard to do better, to respect his boundaries and keep a respectful distance

It's not until later when Alastor has time to think about it that he actually realizes that he kinda enjoyed it

And that he's envious of the others who now freely get to soak up your attention and affection for doing little tasks

Like Husk getting scritches and scratches under his chin because he carried a box for you

Angel getting a warm hug with lots of nuzzling and cooing, all because he used his multiple arms to help you cook

Vaggie sheepishly accepting a thank you kiss because she caught you when you almost took a dive down the stairs

Charlie and Niffty are the worst offenders, always helping you and just eating up your praise and hugs

And now whenever Alastor helps you... you just give him a meek thank you and dash off

He's left there waiting for his hug and kiss that won't ever happen

He's not jealous, he told you not to thank him with physical affection

He just didn't realize that he was shooting himself in the foot when he snapped at you

So he starts trying to tempt you into it, taking every opportunity to help you out with every little thing

Alastor will physically shove the others out of the way in order to be the person who helps you out

And he never gets the proper thank you that he's looking for

It's getting to the point where you're driving him insane with those kissy lips and warm embraces

Why won't you just fucking give him some attention!? Oh yeah. Because he ruined it for himself

You do tell him that you're grateful for him and his help, sweetly smiling at him but keeping yourself at a distance

But it's not enough, he wants what everyone else is getting and then some

He hates being excluded or not being special and it's even worse when it comes to you

Alastor's thin patience suddenly snaps when one day while he's out running errands with you

The two of you bump into Zestial and the great overlord opens a door for you, earning a soft kiss on his cheek

It would almost be cute watching you struggle to do that, considering Zestial's height

But instead...Alastor is fucking irritated 😤

Zestial takes it well and you continue to run errands with Alastor for the rest of the day even though he's visibly sulky

His ears are bent back and his eyes are furious

You wonder what you did wrong

He's a bit distant from you for a couple days after that and you miss having him around

Even if you couldn't be with him, you still liked hanging around him and spending time with him

Just when you're starting to feel sorry for yourself and thinking you did something to offend him, wandering the hotel

He shows up by your side and grabs you, miraculously stopping you from almost falling into a fucking hole in the floor that wasn't there yesterday

Charlie is to blame somehow

You're just so happy to see him hanging out with you again that you hug him out instinct

Only to realize you fucked up and try to pull away-

But Alastor's firm grip on you stops you from moving, and he's looking at you in a way that makes your face heat up

"U-uh...um...thank you...Alastor..."

He tuts at you while shaking his head, pulling you flush against him as he leans in closer

"Words won't suffice anymore, my dear~ I'll only accept one thing as payment for my heroic services~"

You definitely don't melt when he suddenly kisses you and if your arms find their way around his neck then...

Who are you to deny him his payment? Kiss that bastard until he's crawling away and begging for mercy

Me hoping I didn't just shoot myself in the foot by bringing up the door thing again..

[ghostofhyuck]

what are we? .☘︎ ݁˖

you're in a situationship with nct dream.

‧˚ʚ ───────── ₊‧꒰ა ୨ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊ ───────── ɞ˚‧

Mark Lee

Everyone thinks that you're wasting your time having Mark as a situationship only. HELLO ??? That's Mark Lee??? He's kind, a gentleman, and everyone wants him but he's there!! stucked in a situationship with you and you're just taking advantage of the situation. But you told Mark many times, you like him yes but you just couldn't commit to a relationship at the moment and he was alright with the setup. You do feel bad but you two consent with the setup, so it's fine. 

Huang Renjun

Having Renjun as a situationship is such a light feeling? You two started as friends who confessed that you two like each other and the next step was what now? You two aren't prepared for a relationship so a non-label situationship it is. It still has that platonic soulmates feeling around but at the same time, you two know when one gives affection and gesture, it's something the other should take seriously. Seriously, having him as your situationship is just having a relationship without the label. 

Lee Jeno

OH. Pulling my hair hard right now because a situationship with Jeno is going to be so chaotic!! It'll be because first, you two have mutual feelings; second, past issues would leave you overthinking about Jeno; and third, you don't want to jump into a relationship where you're the only who wants it. So there's no communication!! And as much as you and Jeno like each other, the mixed signals can be so confusing like why are you so sweet to me, I know you like but do you like me enough to commit ???? tell me !!!

Lee Donghyuck

Another situationship that has a lot of mixed signals. Haechan's sweet, an ideal boyfriend really BUT he already told you that he's just not ready for a relationship BUT he just tends to be so indecisive with his feelings. (cough, gemini, cough) so there's a tendency where he opens up about commitments and stuff but then the next day, it'll be nothing for him LIKE !!!! make up your mind Haechan !!! because you'll be there all confused and wondering where this situationship will go !!! 

Na Jaemin

Hey are you still there? Good --- situationships with Jaemin would probably be the worst, (leos lol) he's the life of the party and if he's bored, he'll be bored. But if he remembers that he has you, he'll go back to you even though there are times that you'll be left hanging. You don't know what to feel about it but hey, it's Jaemin. Even if he calls you at an ungodly hour of 1 am, you'll be willing to meet up with him because you like him, and you hope that his feelings for you haven't fade yet. 

Zhong Chenle

Oh situationships with Chenle would probably be the fun type of situationship ??? It's like the honeymoon phase where you two are clingy with each other, flirt nonstop, and probably had fucked more than once. Everyone is convinced that you two are together but they'll be shocked that you two are not in a relationship. A situationship ??? Really ??? when you are THIS clingy with each other ??? You two probably would laugh it off but wouldn't try to open it to the other because you two are afraid of ruining with what you two have because of a serious commitment. 

Park Jisung

Situationships with Jisung can test your patience. Sure, he's everything and perfect. He treats you nicely BUT why can't he commit? why does he need to put you in a situationship when he is a complete package of a boyfriend !!! You tried to open it to Jisung but he tries to brush it off, he never said that he's not ready for a relationship so what's holding him back ??? probably would ignore all the signs that you want him because Jisung thinks that being a situationship is okay with him and you deserve more (but at the same time, he doesn't want to let you go!)

[scoutswritingcorner]

Little Shit

Alastor x GN! Reader

A/N: A little something while I work on requests! And Since y’all loved the silly little domestic imagine, here is another! PURELY PLATONIC. Alastor does refer to you as “Little Mouse”

TW:NONE-

Now Alastor loves you (as much as psychopathic cannibalistic serial killer can) but he’s also a little shit. He’s just a silly little creature! 

If you trust him (first mistake) enough or you're on really really good terms with him and decide to tell him your deepest darkest fear (second mistake) oh boy, have fun. Now obviously he’s gonna fucking torture you, he gets a good laugh out of it but if it’s actually like causing you to freak out or physically hurt yourself. He’ll chill out big time. But he will still sometimes scare you. He’s sadistic. You signed up for this.

Like- you have a fear of heights? He’s picking your ass up and putting you on the highest part of the hotel. Don’t worry, he’ll catch you if you fall :). But if you scream at him enough he’ll begrudgingly get you down and bring you to your favorite store/ ice cream shop as an apology! You don’t have to accept the apology because he honestly doesn’t care but he’ll actually apologize to you with a side hug and all!

He also likes to watch you all the time, he has a staring problem AND he’s trying to understand what makes you tick the most. Don’t forget the constant tapping you with his cane, he will do it. Don’t try to threaten him, it makes him do it more. He’s an annoying little brat. You could be talking with a random guest or Charlie and he’ll pop up behind you to tap you on the head with his cane and turn away like he didn’t just do it.

Say you have a crush on someone and tell Alastor, he’ll make it his mission to try and embarrass your ass. Just, “Did you know, my little mouse here, takes a bath with rubber duckies.”  (you do not. He’s pulling shit out of his ass by now). Don’t be afraid to snatch him by his ear and chew him out! You’re the only one who can do this! He’ll do it back so be wise on how hard you tug his poor ear.

Oh boy, if you have a crush on someone in the hotel or even Lucifer. He’s ramping it up and will not stop until you’re red faced and hitting his chest. If you have a crush on Lucifer, he’s lecturing you. No ifs ands or buts, he’s pulling that card. “You can not be serious, Little Mouse. The short one? Look at how well he’s run things-” 

He will pull pranks on you, small things that you won’t look twice at until it happens. Like tuning your alarms to 3am instead of the normal time you wake up. Moving something an inch from where it was so you either trip or stub your toe. Or maybe put salt into your coffee instead of sugar. Who knows. He does.

Once again, he will wrestle and play with you (NOT LIKE THAT YA NASTIES) and he will not be gentle unless you tell him to be. You will end up with bumps, bruises, bites and somehow a cut on your arm. He will also trip you himself so he can catch you, nothing romantic like. I mean he will snag you by the back of your shirt before you're an inch from the ground. Don’t try, he'll evade your attempts.

Will make your food really really spicy and then hide all the milk and ice cream until you beg him. You’re in tears and drooling about to drink all the creamer in the fridge before a gallon of milk appears in front of you as Alastor goes back to serving everyone else NORMAL food.

A/N: Older sibling vibes. Don't let him fool you, he was destined to be an older sibling.