#BETTER THAN WATCHING AN ACTION MOVIE TF????

[amethyst-huntress]

In the Heat of Battle - P x Reader

Requested by @amethyst-huntress

Notes: The premise of this fic was requested by Amethyst-Huntress and I started absolutely foaming at the mouth at the idea, so huge thank-you’s are in order for that nugget of inspiration. Unfortunately, same as last time, I have still barely progressed through the game thanks to my lack of patience and skill, so please forgive that both of my fics take place extremely early in playthrough. Other than that, thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoy!

— 

Where is that damn puppet? You think to yourself, teeth gritted at the deadly inconvenience standing in front of you. 

In the dark and the rain and the constant buzzing noise of Krat, you admit it's easy to get turned around. Even traveling with a companion -in your case, with Gepetto’s puppet- it’s easy to lose track of which gloomy alleys you’d already traversed. Even standing back to back, nudging each other with your elbows, even checking in every so often,“You still with me?” It was easy to get lost. But now, standing face to face with a candelabra wielding automaton and a rabid mechanical dog, you’re  not feeling very generous towards your puppet companion. He’s probably searching for you in a frenzy at this very moment. 

Ha.

Fat load of good it does you. 

The automaton winds up and its eyes flash red across your face. Target locked. The candelabra comes crashing towards your head, but it's met instantly with the clanging cold steel of your sword. The automaton stumbles backwards. Its head cocks unnaturally to the side and you hear something whir, as if in frustration, beneath its face. It winds up again to strike you, but you’re quick and clever; you land a blow in the dead center of the loathsome thing's torso. A sick crunch of metal echoes as you draw the sword out of the brand new gaping cavity in its chest. The automaton sinks to its knees. You look down your nose at it, satisfied at your own skill. The enemy looks to be shutting down, but in a quick, almost desperate motion, its hand shoots towards your foot, grasping wildly. It's cold fingers close around your ankle, but you quickly stamp it out with your free foot. The automaton lets out a weak mechanical wheeze as its hand is crushed beneath your boot. For good measure, you take the hilt of your sword in both hands and slam the base through the miserable things forehead. It crackles, then collapses finally on the ground. You smile darkly at its now lifeless shell. Perhaps a little early. 

A sharp bark cuts through the air and your head snaps to attention. Shit. You forgot about the damn dog. Before you have the chance to raise your sword again, the dog lunges at you. Razor sharp teeth clang dissonantly together and the sound ripples against the glistening walls of the alley. In an instant, you’re knocked to the wet, muddy ground; the iron paws of the mutt are already upon your chest. The mongrel snarls mere centimeters from your face, black oily fluid spilling from its mouth as if salivating. You groan and struggle beneath its weight but regain your grip on your sword just in time to catch its rabid jaw. The dog bites down on your blade, thrashing its head to either side. You strain against its unnatural strength, attempting to pull your weapon free. In one fell swoop you’ll rip it free and decapitate this fucking thing. Your fingers curl tighter around your hilt, you ready a strike, suck in one sharp breath and then-

You freeze.

A second blade appears, glinting in the gaslight, right between your eyes. Thick black fluid goes splattering across your face. The mutt goes limp, its full weight crushing your lower torso. A gasp is pushed from your lungs and you roll to the side, quickly shoving the robotic corpse away from your body. You kneel, palms pushing into the slick ground. Your heart is thundering beneath your shirt as you swallow frigid air hard and fast. When you finally catch a breath, you turn your head towards the owner of the blade; Pinocchio, your companion. He wipes the rapier against his trousers, cleaning the sludge from its razor sharp surface. You huff, blowing matted wet bangs out of your face. 

“I had that under control.” You say sharply. P cocks an eyebrow at you, unconvinced. You feel your face burn in annoyance. “I did!” You insist, “Had you given me just one more minute I would’ve been fine. And probably less covered in this.” You jab your weapon in his direction, flecking dark oil across his shirt. He shoots you a slightly apologetic smile. 

He knows you can handle yourself, he does. He just worries. You can’t blame him; you do the same thing. You’ve gotten quite close on these arduous journeys, saving each other's skins more times than either of you can count. As you wipe the sludge from your face, P extends his hand to you and begrudgingly you take it. Swiftly, he helps you to your feet. His eyes flicker up and down your face, narrowing on your cheek. He licks the thumb of his legion hand and streaks it across your cheek, lifting the remnants of black. You scrunch your nose up at him.

“Eugh- enough-” You whine, swatting the hand away. “Where did you run off to anyways?” 

Pinocchio’s legion arm gestures behind his head. You squint through the darkness at the distant yellow lights of Hotel Krat up ahead. You grimace. It’s further still than you thought. “I don’t suppose you found some kind of underground shortcut?” P shakes his head apologetically. You both sigh, knowing you’ve got plenty of dangers yet to face before you’re given any time to rest. These days spent traveling have taken their toll on your bodies, but you’re at least grateful to have a friend in the gloom of Cerasani Alley. Your sword slides neatly into your belt as you walk ahead of Pinocchio. “Back to it then.” 

As the two of you push forward, you notice a concerted effort on your companions' part to stick close to your side. At any strange noise or eerie shadow, P reaches for your hand. You squeeze back in reassurance that all is well. A bit unnecessary? Sure. But you don’t fight it. It’s much preferred to losing the poor boy again. 

Drawing closer to your destination with only a few minor scuffles to slow you down, you reach a dilapidated fairgrounds. Sickly yellow light bulbs buzz overhead and cast an ominous glow across the entire scene. A ghostly music box melody plinks and permeates the air. You look to P quizzically. 

“You’re sure this is the right way?”

P takes in his surroundings and gives you a curt nod. You grimace in reply. This decrepit place gives you the creeps.

Together you silently weave through wooden cutouts of circus performers, checking carefully for hidden enemies. It's suspiciously quiet, save for the phantasmal carnival music that grows louder as you approach an iron gate. Another barrier. Excellent. 

“P?” You step aside and gesture to the locked gate. Pinocchio smiles slyly at you, boyishly pleased that there’s still a few things you can’t do without him. You want to roll your eyes, but you watch reluctantly impressed, as deep violet energy crackles around his fist. In one swift swing, he punches through the gate and leaves a smoking crater where the lock once sat. He shoots you a sharp smile, satisfied with himself. 

And then you feel something. A great mechanical thud rippling beneath your feet. Your heads snap in unison towards the source and your eyes go wide at the sight of the staggering monster in front of you. At least 3 times your size looms the Parade Master, constructed of decaying parts and craquelured paint. Its massive fist alone is as wide as your body, and sways heavily at its side. 

You unsheathe your blade, and its weight sinks your shoulders. It's not ideal for speed you admit, but the vindication after landing those obliterating killing blows to your enemies is unbeatable. Keeping your eyes locked on target, you whistle to catch Pinocchio’s attention. You started doing this early on. Whistles were a good line of nonverbal communication when you couldn’t afford a glance in each other's direction. 

“Flank him?” You suggest. Pinocchio whistles quick and sharp in agreement. Your fingers tighten around the great sword and your chest thrums with anticipation. You jut your chin in the direction of your common enemy. “After you.” 

Without looking, you know his brows are furrowed together in deep focus. You can perfectly visualize the way he lures the puppet away, his steps meticulously timed and graceful. As you wind your way behind the thing, you hear the clang of P’s rapier against tarnished metal. Your enemy rears its arm back, and you follow suit striking its vulnerable back with a satisfying SHUK! You yank the blade out of its now damaged shell and catch the briefest glance at your companion and oh. Oh. The way he looks at you. 

With fascination?

Admiration?

It’s something greater, deeper than that. Your heart skips. But you shake yourself out of distraction, startled at the sound of your own voice calling out. Your lips move before your mind has time to catch up. 

“MOVE!” 

Exactly as you shout it, P dodges a strike from the Parade Master. The brute’s fist lands in the brick pavement, blowing a hole through it instantaneously. You gulp at the thought of your companion lying there instead, crushed. Your skin goes cold. 

No. Never.

Knowing neither of you can afford another lapse in attention, you suck in one long loud whistle between your teeth. The Parade Master whips itself around to face you. Two huge lamp-like eyes glow sickly in your direction. This was intentional. You can distract for now and give your ally a moment to catch his breath. You ready both hands on your weapon and take a step back. The monster lurches forward, its steps accompanied by a horrid clanking sound. 

“Get over here you fucking rust bucket…” You mutter grimly under your breath as the space between you and the looming threat of death shrinks. You breathe deeply and steel yourself, heels digging into stone. You watch carefully as the puppet rushes towards you, arms swinging wildly. Just when the behemoth is about to crush you beneath its huge frame, you duck between its legs and emerge from behind. There’s just enough time to land a solid blow. P’s rapier crosses with your greatsword, both your weapons plunging into the deteriorated creatures back. 

“This one’s mine, P.” You snap, pulling your blade from its fresh wound. 

“Mine.” P parrots with a smirk, retrieving his rapier as well. Being a man of so few words, you can't help feeling amused even given the circumstances. This is good. The beast is growing weaker. If you can both keep level heads this will all be over soon, you think to yourself. 

At least until your enemy decapitates itself. 

Your jaw drops as the Parade Master rips its own head from its massive shoulders. It wields its shiny new weapon like an enormous mace and swings it your way. It makes contact with the ground, and the impact alone is enough to shake your balance. You dive to the side, narrowly avoiding collision with the wall. You struggle to recalibrate, to size up the situation while keeping yourself out of the range of attack. You hear P whistle pointedly across the arena, waiting on your instruction. Your mind races for a plan and comes up blank. 

“Hold on!” You shout, “Just- Just hold on, I’ll think of something.” You’ll have to if you want to leave this place in one piece. There’s nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. All you can think to do is attack. And you do; your blade leaves white hot gash marks on the enemy, but it hardly seems to be enough against such a terrible and towering foe. You’ve angered it now, and it’s in a total frenzy. The Parade Master swings its massive head in your direction again and you raise your sword to block it. Half a second too late. 

As your weapons collide, the impact sends you to the ground. You gasp at the sharp pain that shoots through your skull. There’s a ringing in your ears and a soft dark edge to your vision. You struggle against unconsciousness and fight to keep yourself upright. Things are moving slow; trails of light obscure the events unfolding in front of you. 

You comprehend something catching the Parade Masters' attention, you watch the goliath wind up, you hear something cry out, and then hear nothing at all. A sick feeling churns in the pit of your stomach and bile rises in your throat. Something’s wrong. You search the scene frantically for your ally. Your line of sight flickers from the Parade Masters head to the ground slick with rain. Your throat tightens. With his face turned to the ground, his eyes fighting to stay open, lies Pinocchio. His rapier skitters across the stone, coming to a sudden halt beneath the foot of the Parade Master. 

Something flashes through you, anger, grief, adrenaline; whatever it is, it propels you forward. Your weapon is suddenly weightless as you skid between the monstrous puppet and your companion. The head of the Parade Master collides with your sword and the sound echoes through the arena with an arresting ring. You breathe hard in disbelief of your own courage. Your teeth are bared and your furrowed brow is sticky with sweat. 

“Don’t. Touch him.” You command, and you swear even your mindless enemy hears it. A deep guttural sound is forced from the very bottom of your lungs as you thrust your weapon through the center of the automaton's body. It doesn’t die, but you hear something inside it break, and the creature slows significantly as if becoming too heavy for its own armature. 

You risk a glance over your shoulder. P looks like absolute hell, covered in grime, barely staggering to his feet. Your chest tightens at his condition, but he’s alive. 

Alive. It’s enough. 

The enemy screams in frustration, rippling orange flames and black smoke billow from the place its head once sat. You stare at the hilt of your great sword, still lodged in its heart. 

“P, your sword-” You start, but your ally is already on it, your strategic minds miraculously attuned. He sends the rapier sailing -now free of the parade masters foot- towards your open hand. It whips past your head and slides perfectly into your grasp. With what's left of the enemy in your sights, you take a running start. 

Time seems to slow; the taste of victory teases you. Your head is about to collide with the hulking hunk of metal just as you raise your boot and dig its heel into the hilt of your great sword. Its placement serves as a stepping stone, and you scale the furious beast. You clamber up its torso towards its shoulders and feel heat radiating from the inside. It burns your hands, which grip the edge of the cavernous socket of its missing head. The monster thrashes beneath you like a wild bull, desperate to throw you off. You tighten your grip, the white hot metal searing your palm. You force yourself to ignore the pain as you raise the rapier and plunge one final devastating blow into the blazing cavity. You feel the rapier obliterate whatever mechanism kept the Parade Master alive, and it crumbles finally beneath you. 

Atop the shoulders of your freshly slaughtered enemy, you fall forward with a deafening CRASH. Your body tumbles to the ground. Your grip on the rapier goes slack. Exhaustion ripples through you, and you surrender to its sweet embrace. 

You hadn’t even realized you’d lost consciousness until your eyes flutter open, met by the stunning blue gaze of your companion mere inches from your face. For a moment you forget yourself, the urge to sink into his arms is so tempting. But your pride wins out and you scramble into an upright position, barely awake. Pinocchio lets out a sigh of relief and you see his shoulders relax. Had he been just as terrified as you were at the prospect of losing him? Did that same dread sit in the pit of his stomach? 

Your head swims with what-ifs, but you have no energy to find their answers. With strength that you’re shocked to still possess, you throw your arms around the puppet. Your fingers clutch the wet fabric of his shirt as if he might disappear the moment you let go. His body tenses at first, then melts under your touch. You feel his head settle between your neck and shoulder, solid and secure. Silently breathing in the smell of him feels like waves of relief crashing over your head. 

You wish the journey could end here in the peace and quiet of this embrace, but you feel him begin to pull away and your heart sinks. Face to face with you, his eyes search for signs of damage, for something to mend. His hands find yours and you hiss involuntarily. His eyebrows knit together in concern. You try not to grimace. 

“It’s nothing.” you promise, “Burned my hand, that's all.”

P looks down at your hand and cradles it gently in his own. With painstaking care, he lifts it to his mouth and places a feather-light kiss in your palm, then on each of your scraped and bleeding knuckles. He looks up at you through those thick raven-wing lashes and you notice a trace of your blood left on his lips. The sight makes your head swim and it takes the entirety of your willpower not to catch his mouth with yours. Your posture stiffens as you try to regain your composure. 

“Well it’s not far now, is it?” You ask, deflecting back to the mission at hand. “There will be plenty of time to patch each other up at the hotel. Right?” You offer, already stupidly aching for the return of Pinocchio’s delicate touch. He blinks a few times, as if he were struggling to focus himself. But he nods enthusiastically. You feel a smile creep across your lips. 

As you leave the destroyed fairgrounds behind, you let your good hand slip into that of your companion. The two of you venture forth, certain to never lose track of the other again. 

— 

If you read this and enjoy it please let me know! Seeing your positive comments and tags absolutely warms my heart and motivates me to keep writing. Thank you so much to those of you who took the time to leave me some kind words on my last fic <3

[qatheauthoress74]

Transformers One Spoiler Review

There are so many spoliers in this review. I am not kidding when I say go watch the film (five times at least) before reading this. Okay? Good.

I’m gonna be honest here. Growing up I wasn’t all that invested in the Transformers franchise as other kids were. I ocasionally watched a random episode of Transformers Animated or Prime whenever they were on TV back in the day but I wasn’t what you’d call a fan. All that changed after I watched Bumblebee (2018) on a whim and it changed my brain chemistry in the best way. Seriously, that film is still one of my comfort movies and I love it so much that I even began to write fanfiction again with several TF fics, including my Riding A Sunset story (https://archiveofourown.org/works/17648414/chapters/41617823).

But before Bumblebee, theatrical Live Action Transformer films had the infamous status of being bad to downright terrible for overusing bland human characters over the Autobots or Decepticons as well as being very inconsistent with their own established continuity. Not to mention making some characters act very out of character. Seeing a film like Bumblebee helped me believe that filmmakers are capable of telling a story that not only respects the lore but also genuinely cares about substance over spectacle outside of the well-made fight scenes. That was why I wanted to give Rise of the Beasts a chance when it came out but I was sadly a little underwhelmed. It is still better than any of the Transformer films Micheal Bay directed, but personally, that’s like saying the Eukrea 7 film “Pocket Full of Rainbows” is better than E7: Ao and the follow-up film trilogy, which isn’t saying much. Again, that’s just me and my biased opinion. Which is the whole point of this review.

But believe me when I say I did want to give Transformers One a chance. I was hopeful after learning it was going to be fully animated and would actually focus on the Transformers instead of some random humans. So, what kind of plot would the film be about it’s a prequel set on Cybertron?

Well…

Plot: The premise is the origin of the mighty leaders of the Autobots and Decepticons, Optimus Prime and Megatron, and how the two factions would eventually fight over control of their home planet, Cybertron. Both started as lowly miners unable to transform into vehicles like the other half of their race can and so are forced to work day in and day out in their underground home of Iacon City to collect the fuel source known as Energon. The reason they need to do so is because 50 cycles before the events of the story the leaders of Cybertron, The Primes, died in a war against an alien race called the Quintessons. After they were killed an important relic known as the Matrix of Leadership disappeared and it led to the Energon dwindling until it could only be found deep under the planet’s surface. Without Energon, the Cybertronians would perish, which is why Orion Pax (Optimus Prime’s identity before he became a Prime) wants to find out what happened to the Matrix of Leadership. The current leader of the Cybertronians, Sentinel Prime, is trying to find it out on the surface but has been unable to do so. D-16 (Megatron’s original name) would rather keep his head down but constantly gets dragged into whatever zany scheme Orion has come up with at the moment. Thanks to unintentionally antagonizing a Cybertronian named Darkwing the two get dumped into the lowest place imaginable and meet an overly talkative but friendly bot called B-127 (aka Bumblebee). There they discover a warped message from one of the fallen Primes, Alpha Trion, calling for aid. Orion sees this as an opportunity to find a clue to where the Matrix might be and convinces D and Bee to help him reach the surface and inadvertently brings along Elita-1, Pax and D’s former boss, who recently lost her job thanks to them breaking protocol to save another miner’s life. The four bots end up discovering Alpha Trion’s unconscious body and manage to wake him up. He reveals to them that Sentinel is not what he seems and tells them a horrible truth:

Sentinel was never a Prime and was the one responsible for killing the original Primes with help from the Quintessons.

And all of the Energon the Cybertronians have been mining was being given to the Quintessons by Sentinel as a form of hush money to keep them from revealing his true colors to the Cybertronians. The heroes later learn that he was also the one responsible for taking their cogs as newborns so they could never have the freedom to be anything else but miners. The story then goes to show how Orion, Elita, and Bee want to bring Sentinel to justice while D (who gets slowly consumed by his deeply suppressed anger) wants to seek vengeance against Sentinel for what he has done and kill him for his crimes. The story gradually unfolds as lines are drawn, and tragically, the beautiful friendship between Orion and D ends with them becoming bitter enemies under their new personas, Optimus and Megatron. The movie ends bittersweetly with Optimus inspiring his former fellow miners into becoming Autobots and bringing Energon back to the planet as soon as he was given the Matrix after he sacrificed himself trying to save Sentinel from D/Megatron’s wrath. He also gave the miners their T-Cogs back, restoring their freedom and autonomy. Optimus then sends a message to the Quintessons, telling them he and the Autobots will be ready to face them when they return. Meanwhile, Megatron forms a new faction consisting of the previous members of the dead Primes' High Guard and calls them Decepticons to remind themselves to never be deceived by anyone again.

Damn.

Characters/Voices: The film leans heavily on established lore from pretty much all of the comics, the Aligned Continuity, some Live Action stuff, and Transformers Animated. I wasn’t bothered by the celebrity voice cast. Don’t get me wrong, I will always choose professional VAs over celebrities anytime, but I genuinely thought everyone did a great job, especially Chris Hemsworth as Orion/Optimus and Brian Tyree Henry as D-16/Megatron. Henry said in interviews he was using his experience as an activist in college as inspiration for how resentful and angry D-16/Megatron sounded in wanting to change things and I say he succeeded. Hemsworth had done his homework by consulting with THE Optimus Prime himself, Peter Cullen. I personally like to believe Cullen shared his “how I became Optimus Prime story” which is summed up by how Optimus should “Be Strong Enough To Be Gentle.” The reason I think that is because I felt it in Hemsworth’s performance, especially at the end of the film. I loved how they gradually sounded more like Optimus and Megatron as the story progressed. Which is both amazing and heartbreaking at the same time because you could see from the start how close Orion and D-16 were to each other before learning about the truth. It gave me the same feelings after seeing other great friendships/sibling bonds like Vi/Power/Jynx and Moses/Ramses fall apart in Arcane and The Prince of Egypt. Also, was anyone else reminded of that scene from The Fox and The Hound Todd and Copper's promise of staying friends after seeing Optimus' flashback of his first meeting with D-16? );

Other standouts include Laurence Fishburne as Alpha Trion. He gave the Prime a grand presence that almost reminds me of James Earl Jones as Mufasa from The Lion King. RIP.

Scarlett Johansen was great as Elita-1, but I already had zero doubts since she had experienced voice acting before this film.

Vanessa Liguori did a great job of giving Airachnid a sinister personality.

And I have no idea who this “Jon Bailey” is, but he certainly gave Soundwave an “Epic” voice that I liked. ;)

Steven Buscemi as Starscream was a delightful surprise, even if I learned way more about Starscream’s kinks in this film than I would like, but hey, if he likes getting hit and choked, I won’t kink shame him.

Jon Hamm made me hate Sentinel so much. Give him an Oscar, please.

Now, the one actor who I was a bit wary of was Keegan-Michael Key as B-127/Bee. Bee has quickly become one of my favorite Transformers thanks to Bumblebee (2018), and I was worried Key would make him unbearable to sit through. But as I said earlier, the script (and possibly the voice director) made Bee come off as annoying in a “doesn’t know better” kind of way that almost leans to obnoxious but more akin to a hyperactive young adult who’s happy to have friends. Heck, the film even knows his voice could get annoying and made several funny jokes surrounding it. Also, the film knew to only have Bee talk too much during scenes that were supposed to be funny. When it came to the more quiet moments Bee was able to take things seriously as well as the rest of the characters.

And yes, I noticed Steve Blum was the racer announcer and archive guard. He did amazing as per usual. No notes.

Animation: I can’t stress enough how beautiful the animation for this film is. Industrial Light & Magic did an excellent job with the animation and I hope to see them do another Transformers film like this again. I loved the way Iacon City was designed.

The director, Josh Cooley, said the filmmakers were inspired by the Art Deco movement and you can see it from how the buildings look. It gives off a Metropolis meets Blade Runner in the best way. I also liked the way the roads and rail tracks would “magically” appear when someone was driving on them. And the way the planet’s mountains moved was also nice to look at.

And this is something that my mom liked while she watched the film was how Alpha Trion used sand to show the past and what happened to the Primes. (Who knew Alpha Trion was an Earthbender? XD)

One touch that I really like was when after the quartet learns of Sentinel’s alliance when the Quintessons you can see D-16 is sitting further away from the others and has his back facing them. A subtle sign showing the growing distance between him and the heroes. And the way his optics gradually changed from gold, orange, and finally to red was done very well.

Also, when Orion reunited with the miners he made sure to kneel so he wasn’t towering over them. It’s a nice way that show how humble he truly is compared to Sentinel and later Megatron.

And another thing was when D-16 shot Orion his left arm got destroyed. D-16 originally ad the Megatronus Prime decal Orion gifted him at the beginning of the film on his right arm, too. It truly feels like D-16 is destroying his old self in that moment.

Did anyone else notice that Shockwave and Soundwave initially had yellow optics and visors, but they were changed to red in the post-credit scene? They must've did it to match their new leader, which I'm sure Starscream was very "happy" about since he was originally leader of the High Guard and had red optics before Megatron. XD

I didn’t expect this film to get violent, but the shot of Megatron killing Sentinel by pulling him apart was brutal. The film did not kid around with its PG rating.

Nitpicks:

If I could complain about a few things I would say that I wished the film had a slightly longer runtime. At least 10-15 more minutes in the third act. I would’ve loved to see more of the final battle with the miners fighting Sentinel’s soldiers and Optimus vs. Megatron. I did mean it when I said Hemsworth and Henry killed it as Optimus and Megatron. But hey, if their performances were that good it definitely convinced me to go see the next film with them in it.

I would’ve liked to have seen other animals on Cybertron’s surface besides those metal deer but that’s just me.

Also, this is just a me thing again, but I kinda wished the miner characters (or minors XD) had more distinct voices. It’s just that since the Generation 1 cartoon, all of the Autobots were known for having unique accents like Ironhide’s southern drawl, Wheeljack’s Brooklyn accent, or Jazz’s smooth way of speaking. I mean, if the High Guard/Decepticons were allowed to have voices based on their original counterparts the Autobots should’ve had the same thing, ya know?

And how dare they tease me with namedropping “Medic Ratchet” but not actually have him appear in the film. I want my grumpy doc-bot. And Drift. I don’t think I saw Deadlock with the High Guard. Did anyone? I think I mostly just saw Seekers and Coneheads in the crowd shots.

HC/Theories:

The reason mining Energon was so dangerous had to do with Primus himself deliberately trying to halt it as much as possible. Think about it, Primus sent the Matrix of Leadership away before Sentinel could use it. I bet Primus didn’t want Sentinel to give Energon to the Quintessons which Sentinel ended up doing by making Cybertronians mine for it. Primus also probably made the mountains move while the group was on the train because we later learn it was full of Energon and not waste like Elita initially thought. Primus has been trying to undermine Sentinel’s plans all this time but probably couldn’t do too much damage as he didn’t want to hurt innocent Cybertronians in the process. And another thing to add is the fact that it looks like the planet itself is moving after Orion was dropped by D-16/Megatron so that Primus himself would bring him to the planet’s core and bring him to life as Optimus Prime because he knew the young miner was worthy of the Matrix.

I’m pretty sure Jazz became one of the first Autobots because he wanted to show his appreciation to Optimus for saving his life earlier in the film.

I like to think the reason why B talked so much in One was probably to make up for the fact that he barely talked at all in previous TF films. Though, there is another theory going around that in the next movie, the filmmakers are planning to make him mute which is why he talks alot in One. I seriously hope that WON’T happen because I’m sick and tired of Bee losing his voice so often. I know some later shows have avoided this, namely Robots in Disguise (2015) and EarthSpark, but I would seriously love the films to follow the same example.

Overall:

I love this movie a lot. I’m pretty sure if this was my first time seeing it instead of Bumblebee (2018) I think this would’ve altered my brain chemistry as much as that film did. If you haven’t seen this movie go watch it and if you have, go see it again. I WANT this movie to do well in theaters and not be a failure. The fact that it took us this long to get a film that captures the Spark of Transformers and be something both fans and newcomers can enjoy is nothing short of a miracle. We need Hasbro and Paramount to know this and Bumblebee are the kind of content we want to keep seeing and not the same movie with “Bayhem” over and over again.

Thank you. I’m already writing another blog about this movie soon. It’s going to be about why TF: One is a better Wish movie than Wish (2023). Trust me, it’ll make sense once I post it. XD

Keep on Writin’ and Rockin’

[icyrambles]

one of the things i find consistently weird about transformers as a piece of media is how the decepticons keep being the bad guys without any really attempt at reworking them as a faction

pretty much every continuity that exists has the decepticons filling the role as the primary antagonists. here's a list of the tf media i've consumed over the past year; g1, animated, prime, cyberverse, earthspark, rotb, first 2 bayverse movies, idw1 + idw2, the first 5 issues of tf skybound, shattered glass, the first 10 episodes of rid15, and a few episodes of armada and beast wars. and literally all of those have the decepticons fulfilling the role of antagonists.

now i'm specifically not taking issue with the fact that the decepticons are the bad guys. that's not my problem here. my problem is that the franchise as a whole seems to have a problem with actually developing the decepticon characters and the faction as characters/concepts worth being antagonists

this isn't a dash on the existing pieces of transformers media just to be clear, i enjoy cartoonishly evil shenanigans as much as the next person (my favourite character is fucking tarn for goodness sake). instead please read through the rest of this post as a single person's critique of a tonal inconsistency throughout the franchise of transformers

with the more recent pieces of transformers media attempting to paint the decepticons in a more sympathetic light (see cyberverse and earthspark) i noticed a core writing flaw with how the teams behind these works tackled making the decepticons more morally grey characters.

and that's the fact that they decepticons are still just as evil as they are in the original g1 cartoon, just with a little more grey paint thrown over their war crimes. it's one of the main writing flaws i have with both idw1/2 and earthspark.

because those writing teams really want you to view the decepticons as less evil. they really want you to watch/read through their content and see the decepticons as a group of individuals who, while not right in their actions, still deserve to be treated as more than a villain of the week.

and i agree with this sentiment. i think the decepticons should be more than villains of the week who need to be defeated at all costs. i think the decepticons should get the opportunity to be fully developed characters with hopes, dreams, aspirations, flaws, and emotions just like their autobot counterparts.

but there's a problem with how these writing teams interact with the decepticons. and it's the fact that they're still the bad guys. even if you give megatron a redemption arc in earthspark, there's still the looming implication that he, along with an army, invaded a random planet and potentially killed millions. (it's a kid show i'm not expecting them to go into detail with all of megan's war crimes, but earthspark does imply that megatron did fuck up a lot of earth's shit)

idw does a slightly better job with this, showing that the autobots have their fair share of war crimes, but the decepticons are still the primary antagonists throughout the comic's run.

even shows that paint the decepticons as purely the bad guys have tonal issues with how they're written

taken animated for example. the autobots get to be fully developed characters with personality traits outside of just being the good guys. bumblebee is impulsive, he likes video games and racing and being a little shit, he's not a beacon of virtue. prowl is antisocial, he doesn't like communicating with his team, but he fucking love nature, he loves meditating. he has a whole backstory about wanting to avoid being drafted into a war for fucks sake.

but the animated decepticons don't get that. there's nothing about blitzwing or lugnut or starscream that makes them uniquely suited to being in the decepticon cast. none of them get to have defining character traits outside of being decepticons who need to be beaten.

the same can be said for prime.

while i don't particularly think that any of the tfp characters are written well, at least the autobots have reasons for their personalities. arcee is a jaded bitch because she watched both of her partners die right in front of her. optimus is distant because he lost his best friend to differing ideologies. ratchet is grouchy all the time because he's constantly running low on fuel and is probably worried about his only family dying horribly in a war while he sits on the sidelines.

but the decepticons. they're just evil. megatron gets so addicted to power that he hypes himself up on the space equivalent of hard drugs for most of the series. soundwave.... he's there i guess? shockwave decided to violate the laws of nature for shits and giggles because the series never decided to expand upon his character except for evil scientist. starscream gets to be a sniveling coward who gets beat up whenever he appears and we never learn why he acts this way.

time and time again, transformers has an issue with writing decepticons as anything more than the bad guys.

and the reason why i take issue with this, isn't just because it's "bad writing" it's because the decepticons have a habit of having backstories that involve being discriminated against and it leaves a very bad taste in my mouth when the group of people who are more than often classified as second class citizens on their own planet get lumped into the role of "bad guys who want to steal and murder and pillage" when they want to change the system that is actively discriminating against them

and this all sounds like a lot of complaining. and it is. but i do have a method of trying to remedy this mess. two ways actually

#1: the hard way. (aka, this is the harder of the writing solutions because it requires viewing the decepticons as more than villains)

instead of having the decepticons being a group of revolutionaries who loose their way and become evil and genocidal seemingly for no reason other than "oh well revolutions don't really work and anyone who starts one just wants to cause problems against the system" why don't writers actually try and view the decepticon faction for what it is in most cases a group of people who were heavily discriminated against and who want to change their planet to actually treat them more than objects.

cybertron is shown to be a shitty planet to live on in more continuity, i can find it perfectly believable that people would want to change the system through radial reform.

show me why the decepticons became the way that they are. don't just tell me that megatron was always a bad person who wanted to become a dictator. that's stupid and highly uncreative after it's been done 15 times in a row in every single continuity

i would highly prefer a series that takes place from the decepticon perspective. i wanna know more about them. why is starscream constantly trying to overthrow megatron? is it because he thinks megatron is a bad leader? does he have a plan for how he would change things if he did become leader? if he's just doing it because he's egotistical, does he have a backstory that made him the way that he is?

give me decepticons with hobbies and personalities outside of wanting to kill everything.

#2: the easy way (this is easier because it doesn't require radical re-imagining of the decepticons as a whole)

just make the decepticons the ruling class. genuinely, just make the decepticons the people in charge from the beginning. you wouldn't have to imagine that many changes. megatron can still be a warlord intent on conquering the galaxy (it's just re-framed through the lens of him always being this way instead of having to learn violence is a solution), starscream constantly vying for the throne is now much easier to understand because the faction isn't rising up from the lower class, they were always in power and starscream wants more of it.

it even works out for the autobots because them being the lower class rising up against a tyrannical force re-contextualizes their desperate want to defend planets being attack by the decepticons. they're not just doing it because it's the right thing, they're doing it because they know what it's like. and that makes their motivations seem more sympathetic than a fucking god complex of saving the "tiny pathetic humans who can't defend themselves"

the decepticons being purely the bad guys is actually the reason why i'm not gonna read the rest of the skybound comics. i have no interest in another comic that is functionally (at least from the five issues i've read) just a bloodier, more violent g1. it's disappointing that instead of trying to explore the existing transformers characters through a different lens other than "evil" tf writers keep making the decepticons the same old bad guys.

this franchise has so much potential for interesting stories, cyberverse proved that to me when they allowed the autobots to team up with clobber, dead end, and soundwave, but it's being held back by the pervasive trope of the decepticons being the bad guys in every single story

[tigressaofkanjis]

I heard the rumors of Transformers Earthspark maybe on the list of being cancelled for a new Transformers show and honestly, I'm quite neutral on it. It's not bad but Earthspark definitely didn't leave any impression on me, and I go into a series usually with a fresh mind. I don't like to compare off the bat. I will always give things a chance. Earthspark was one of those Transformers series that just never stuck to me no matter what I tried.

They say the cancellation may have to do with toy sales and bad reviews but the thing about the bad reviews is that they are mostly bad because of bias factors. That's in no way fair on how you are supposed to judge a series. Absolutely not. It should only come down to plot and characters interacting with the plot. It doesn't matter what their ethnicity or gender is, it's what they bring to make the show work.

Earthspark fell flat for me because of the introduction of the Terrans and the overall plot did not match what they were bringing to the table. The show would have done honestly better without them. I understand it's a kids show but you know Rescue Bots was for toddlers and they handled their plot really well for something that was made without a single Decepticon because they knew how to make their characters work in their setting. If I can't find that key element, no show works. I was fine the humans this time around which is often a problem element in Transformers. They weren't bad honestly. It's the Terrans I hated; they somehow took the qualities of human flaws and made them into a weird, worse mix.

One of the reasons I do see why it failed to appeal to children compared to the TF fans is because children are in no means more or less important than us in their opinions, but they prioritize what they need compared to what they want to keep themselves entertained. As soon as we had representation, new content, and other returning characters not used in forever in a Transformers show, it appeased what we wanted all along, but the catch is was it what the show needed against it's already experimental Terrans adding to boiling pot that is already overcooking. Children don't have the tendency to care as much as we do about connecting with their characters in this particular instance of a show with fighting robots. They like action, they like the awesome plots of the heavier shows and movies that make them pop with excitement over who wins and why. Autobots or Decepticons.

In fact, a good example of need versus want is what I said once in a post about I think the They/Them controversy with Nightshade that telling the audience directly they went by those pronouns subtracted from the character because good writing involves being able to present the fact they go by those pronouns without having to waste a minute explaining it in words. A child watching isn't going to give a shit they go by They/Them. They are going to like Nightshade by what they do and kids will memorize pronouns naturally by the effort the character makes to be involved in the plot that drives what they need out of the series to make it interesting to them. You don't have to graze a minute of this weird interjection that makes no sense explaining pronouns and as a writer, that scene kind of threw me because that was the worst way you could introduce a non-binary character...and children can tell stuff like that being off in how it is presented. if it doesn't add to the plot, throw it away and figure out another way to introduce those characteristics into your character.

So, back to the main point, you end up having all these characters that present nothing to enhance themselves other than being mostly nuisances to the main characters the kids actually wanted to see like Megatron and Optimus, so why would the general audience be interesting in buying their toys if they are forgettable? That explains your toy sales without explicitly blaming it on ethnicity or gender. As for the bad reviews, I assume the bias ones were filtered out because I have seen ones that aren't too far from my type of judgement who bring valid points as to why the show isn't the best at what it does. It had potential after that first season half, but it never seemed to really grow into something I and apparently others cared enough about. And children aren't stupid; they can kind of go by that judgement too.

Now, this is a rumor that it will be cancelled, no solid proof yet. But if it is, it's going to be less surprising than it is if it continues to Season 3. The only reason so far Season 2 exists is because it was greenlit during the first half of Season 1 which wasn't terrible per say but it had the excitement it was going to grow on you in the second half. The second part of Season 1 was...eh.

But that does raise the next question as to what this new Transformers series is and what it's going to put up against Earthspark? Is it influenced by a specific show, is it its own new thing like Earthspark's route? Will it feature humans at all? Will it be even on Earth and take Cyberverse's route in abandoning the typical Earth setting which is a route we really should start venturing into for a while in my personal opinion to kind of explore more about the world of Transformers themselves. If this new show has the better elements of what Earthspark failed to appease to its grand audience (kids, sorry TF fans), it's going to be better off. If it starts off good but falls into the same category, maybe their will be a finalized central element that can be confirmed as to what is really driving the general audiences away.

If the rumor is proven false and there is a Season 3, I will try my hardest to watch it at least once, see if it gets better than what we have currently. I said before I was going to stop watching Earthspark quite early because nothing was going for it for me but I came back to see the second half of Season 1 when it came out. I will see Season 2...but man, this is a tough show to watch.

[quetzalpapalotl]

Watched Sonic 3, here are some assorted rambles about it

There were more adults by themselves at my function than on the TF One one, which was basically just me, the friends I dragged with me and everyone else was kids with their chaperones. It speaks to the popularity of Sonic vs Transformers in Mexico so I'm not surprised. Also unlike Transformers, kids where actually pointing out Sonic lore, whicj was cute.

Thankfully, this movie referenced the Most Important part of Sonic Adventure 2 and the only thing for which I have felt maternal feelings the Chao!!!! They work great as a Japanese mascot franchise. I hope they have Chao tamagochi in this world.

As expected, I didn't need to watch the other two movies to get what's going on. Tho maybe if I had, I would have felt something about that GUN commander dying. But then again while he drew the line at shooting children, he was completely okay keeping one in permanent slumber instead of like, getting him teraphy or something, so I'm not too sympathetic.

Anyway we have him to fill the quota of not portraying the military as unquestionably bad, but I'm quite pleased at how dubious GUN is portrayed otherwise. And that they very much meant to shoot the children. I quite liked that GUN lady and I was hoping she would get a big villain role but I'm kinda confused with her plot line??? She doesn't seem to want the keys for sinister reasons, just to keep them out of reach from other people. Doesn't mention any plans. So why was it bad she had one?? Did I miss something??

I liked Sonic a lot. He felt cool but also very much like a young teen trying to be cool, even when he made pop culture references it felt more natural for who he's supposed to be like just adult writers trying to appeal to kids. Unfortunately there was some quality to his voice that I found annoying, it wasn't the acting, the actor did a good job, but I just didn't like how he sounds.

I knew about the ship tease between of Eggman and Stone (called Roca in Spanish so that's what I'm calling him), but damn, that was gay. Roca is the best character in this movie after Shadow and I hope he find a fulfilling career until totally-not-actually-dead Eggman comes back.

I switched back and forth between finding the Robotniks entertaining and annoying. The children were laughing way less than in TF One which would have made me more tolerant of them.

Everything about Shadow was perfect. I love him. He's so done with everything. Too done, actually. I was surprised that his and Robotnik's plan was explicitly to kill themselves alongside Earth. Then I started wondering why does suicide feel so much darker than killing everyone on Earth. Maybe because kill everyone on Earth is such a cartoon villian plan. I have to admit it's an upgrade to have him just be plain overcome by grief than having him believe Maria would actually want him to kill everyone. I also like how seeing Sonic crying over his dad (I actually felt something and Sonic calling him dad) got to him, because yeah, it makes sense he has never thought how his actions would affect other people since he has had barely any contact with people.

Overall, the movie was too corny for me even for what I'm willing to put up with for a children's movie. I like that it explicitly compares that Sonic got a much better deal than Shadow and that's what makes them different, but also the way it develops felt weird. I get that Sonic using the emerald for revenge is bad but they also needed it to stop them from ending the world. Shadow telling Sonic that he made the same choice as him also feels weird when he's trying to end the entire world.

Regardless I am pleased with what I came for, though I won't watch it again and OH MY GOD THAT'S AMY. SHE'S BEAUTIFUL aaand now I have to watch the next one I guess (especially bc I doubt Shadow is actually dead), though maybe not in teathers. Amy, I love you.

[doubleddenden]

Damn the more I hear about Velma the worst it gets. This saddens me because I've been watching Scooby since before I could talk :(

Mainly what I'm seeing is that someone has contempt for the series + their own ideas for their own incredibly generic show and rather than make something unique, they're just insulting an established series.

My biggest gripes so far:

1. How tf do you got a Scooby Doo show without Scooby Doo? Is he too kiddy for your generic ugly adult cartoon?

2. Shaggy- oh sorry, NORVILLE. Look, I have no problem with the race thing- my literal main issue is that he's called SHAGGY for a reason. How hard is it to give him thick hair? On top of that they make him an actual druggie- let's pretend there's not some subtle racism behind making the perceived 'stoner' of the group black- it's boring. Yes yes we know the gang is a bunch of stoners, but isn't it funnier when it's just IMPLIED? Isn't it funnier that a man just REALLY FUCKING LOVES DOG TREATS and is willing to risk his life on a regular basis for god damn DOG TREATS? Instead they just turn him into yet another Seth Rogan tier predictable disappointment

3. The overall mischaracterization from what I'm seeing just... sucks, and again, I think part of that comes from a contempt for the series. You don't have to make the characters assholes to make them likeable! I know Rick and Morty and Seth McFarland have poisoned the well for a lot of people but you really don't!

Across the franchise there's plenty of fun ways to interpret the characters:

Fred: himbo that loves his friends, dad friend barely holding it together, obsessed with traps- take your pick, none of these are spoiled boring asshole rich kid.

Daphne: if you're opposed to damsel in distress, how about the cool martial artist fashionista made prevalent in the What's New Scooby Doo series or the live action movies? What about being a good reporter? Hell, even her goofy dorky self in Be Cool Scooby Doo is better than the stereotypical snooty popular girl. Props at least for keeping the red hair.

"Norville" is not a self friend zoning beta male and he's not really obsessed with drugs. Literally the man across DECADES of this franchise is ridiculously talented. Ventriloquism, improv acting, gymnast and athlete- seriously, why do you think they have him and the dog constantly running away from monsters and leading them into traps? The man was literally so good at that that he became a COACH. for MONSTERS. Let's also not forget that he was a race car driver! And had a hot girlfriend! In fact, fuck this friend zoned beta male shit- Shaggy literally pulls more girls (and men I think) in the entire franchise than the others COMBINED. If anything he should have dense harem protagonist energy. I'm talking more than Velma, dude also pulled her LITTLE SISTER- and she was okay with it because she knows he's a good guy(mind the AUs)! Pulled a girl that was kinda a monster fucker for him specifically when he was a werewolf, an actual fucking alien, several foreign girls of various nationalities, several average girls, a crazy but hot redneck girl that tried to SCHWOOSCH his bones after seeing the red shirt ONCE, pretty sure he did something good for Daphne to hang out with him for so long with just a bunch of dogs and a random kid they picked up, very sure actual monsters fell for him- and he's a nerd! He and his beloved best friend the talking dog are massive nerds! I reckon people still latch onto that and think he's the stereotypical nerd but no, no, Shaggy has so much going for him! Not to mention- not to mention! Animal lover! Doy! How do you miss that? He's always paired with the animals! The man is a collective family friend of the entire Doo clan! Every time there's a guest appearance with a non human entity, he's hanging out with them!

Velma... alright look. I'm about to say something real controversial. Real controversial. You ready? She is kinda boring and bland. She's smart and a good investigator, but really? This is who you base the show on? Recently she was allowed to be bisexual- that's great! She's well read, well informed, and if you want to skip the bitchy "its me or the dog" persona from Mystery Inc or the snooty geek from Be Cool, you could fall back to the quiet but cute and thoughtful personality she had in A Pup Named Scooby Doo. If not, she's just boring. I feel like most of the hype for her comes from memes or the people that think they're unique for finding her more attractive than Daphne (you're not btw). Like what does she do that the others cannot do? I'm pretty sure Daphne can do her job but without the min max on intelligence and some points in kicking ass. In fact, why are Fred and Daphne the assholes when Velma in TWO separate series has been the judgey bitch and overall asshole? If anything she should would fit the perfect "beta incel self perceived victim that's actually just a massive douche" trope!

And Scooby. First off fuck the writers for not including my boi. Second, you really couldn't make an adult comedy of a talking dog? If Scooby said fuck- scuze me, 'ruck'- I'd cry laughing! If Scooby was the druggie and Shaggy was normal, that'd be hilarious! Literally if they took every negative trait they forced onto the others and put it onto Scooby, you'd literally have a prime adult cartoon character right there. He's a gag character! Utilize it! I know in the recent series he's been pushed to the side for the others, but he's literally a comedic gold mine waiting to happen! Make him an arsonist! Make him have questionable opinions! It'd be hilarious because he's a literal dog that can't speak understandably half the time!

Look, if you want to make an "adult scooby doo" then I guess I can't stop you. Velma ain't how you do it though.

Btw before anyone jumps on me to defend the new show, the creator of the series supports JKR soooo

[rillils]

imagine post endgame bucky having to go alone, without someone to support him, to say sorry to all the people whos family he killed and he keeps saying that he didnt have a choice as his excuse

and he keeps thinking that its not a good enough excuse, that hes not good enough

no, you see, you see!! one of the things that made me uncomfortable about their treatment of Bucky, back when I was watching tf*ws, is precisely this

gonna slap this under a cut because BOY I have things to say

I WWILL NEVER STOP BEING MAD ABOUT THIS. I MEAN.

deciding that he has to apologize for all those deaths implies that he murdered those people willingly, while he was perfectly aware of his actions, of their consequences, and just did it anyways. so now, you know, he has to "atone for his sins", or make amends or whatever. so we're just going to send him off to those dead people's relatives to immolate himself because of course that's the only right thing to do. BUT idk, say what you will, this entire concept just sits wrong with me, I can't help it.

like first of all, we're acting as though killing all those people was a conscious choice on his part, as though he were completely 100% in control of himself and actively chose to murder a bunch of people, just because it suited him or something, when we know, WE FUCKING KNOW, WE HAVE BEEN LITERALLY SHOWN THIS, IT'S A RECURRING THEME IN AT LEAST 2 OF THE CAP MOVIES, that THIS. was NOT. the CASE. and fuck anyone who says any different tbh, mcu included

second, they might argue that by walking up to the victims' relatives and apologizing, Bucky's giving them closure or something, but. just. look at this from their point of view, right. as far as they're concerned, this is the guy who murdered their loved ones in cold blood, and he's just! walking free! getting away with murder(s), apparently without suffering any consequences whatsoever for all his crimes and all the grief he has caused. is that REALLY gonna give anyone closure? or is it just going to hurt them more/make them even angrier/unnecessarily reopen old wounds when there's nothing, really, that can heal or soothe them at this point, but rather just make them more painful than they already were????

so, it doesn't give them closure. and it sure as fuck doesn't give him closure, either.

they send him on this horrible, tragic, terrifying, sad errand, and all he gets out of it is torturing himself some more. seeing the pain and the hatred for him on all of these people's faces, the moment he says "yes, it was me, I pulled the trigger, I killed this person you loved". like, torture, yes, torture!! that's all this is!!! that's all it earns him!!! no peace of mind, no sense of closure, no hint of forgiveness! just more pain!!!!!!

just. I just hate this, you know, I just. I really, really hate this. I especially hate how, as you said, the way they insist on him having to personally apologize is just going to make him feel like his own hardships (aka being physically and emotionally tortured until he broke down and had his identity, agency and free will stripped away from him) were just "an excuse". as though a victim (because THAT'S what he is, THAT'S what he always was, a victim himself) needed an excuse for all his suffering. as if he brought it upon himself. as if he was "asking for it".

nah, all of this, it's just going to make his sense of guilt grow stronger and deeper over time, making him feel even more Unworthy (unworthy of love, unworthy of acceptance, unworthy of living a normal life after everything he's been put through, unworthy of friendship, unworthy of being seen as a whole person, as a human rather than a murderer) than he already felt before, making his own pain so overwhelmingly powerful that he might end up feeling like his entire existence is a mistake, and everybody would be better off if he just wasn't around anymore. and that's just so horrifying that I refuse to contemplate it.

[joemothersfavoritechild]

“don’t leave” mike schmidt x reader

-mike schmidt x childhood best friend reader

-a couple words probably

an: um.. hey guys. first off, i’m sorry that i completely abandoned my mike fic. i’m still very much obsessed with him, but the obligation of doing it and hoping that people would like it freaked me out. sorry :)))

on another note, here’s a little something that i wanted to share. i got my inspiration from a tiktok comment lmao. also this is a one shot, i have no motivation for another one (maybe MAYBE an epilogue).

also where tf did you guys go? ik i stopped posting but that doesn’t mean that you’re allowed to :(

summary: you’re about to leave for college when your childhood friend texts you.

———————————————————————————-

i’m here

The text was a little jarring. The blinding light of your phone reminds you of the fluorescent lights of the high school you just graduated from. It’s been two months since you wore the cap and gown and it was time to start becoming an adult. You looked back towards the box, marked with your name, as you tossed a pair of socks into it.

You were packing to leave. You had lucked out, with a scholarship to a college that was widely out of your price range and states away. You worked your ass off and it meant something, it was a dream. You’d have free housing on campus and finally get to see what it was like to be on your own. As you looked back at your phone, you wondered if maybe it was a nightmare.

Mike had texted you, your best friend of years. You’d met when you were seven when you’d moved into his neighborhood. You were young and scared but Mike pulled you down the street and you never looked back. You’ve gone through literally everything together, puberty, fights, and that one time in middle school when you dated (but don’t talk about).

You were sixteen when you realized that you were in love with him. The two of you were at his house, watching tv on the couch while his parents were gone, which was most of the time. You can’t remember what you were watching, it was probably some shitty action movie that he had been bugging you about. You were laid down across the couch, legs in his lap, not paying attention to the screen. You felt his hands on you, rubbing into the skin of your calves. Taking in a sharp breath from your nose, you realize that this isn’t something that “normal” friends feel. The realization laid heavy in your chest for years, far too scared to lose him if you said something.

Now you were going to lose him anyway. You’d be gone for four years, a lot could happen in that time. People say that they’ll still talk, text every day, but you know it’s a crock of shit. People change and fall out of touch in a few months, who knows what could happen in years. Maybe he’d realize he was better off without his friend who was constantly staring at him. Maybe he’d get an actual girlfriend, or maybe you’d be able to move on.

You narrowed your eyes at the words on your screen, what was he doing here? It was like 3 am and you were leaving in the morning. You’d already said your goodbyes. Mike was staying in town, saying that he’d rather start working than go to college. He’d never admit it, but you knew it was because he couldn’t afford it.

You left your phone as you stood up from the ground and creeped out of your room. Your parents were sleeping, like you should’ve been, but you were a procrastinator at heart and put off your packing till the last minute. You slowly closed your door behind you, tiptoeing to the front door.

Holding your breath, you inched the front door open. Mike was standing there, staring at the ground, his bike thrown carelessly behind him. He looked up as he heard the door. Your eyes widened as you took in his appearance, was he crying? It was dark, all the lights were off, but you could see a familiar glisten in his eyes. You slipped out onto the front porch, shutting the door with a quiet click.

“Mike?” You asked, not sure what was happening.

He gave you a small smile, “Hey.”

You gave him an uncertain smile of your own, crossing your arms around yourself to try to warm up. The air was bitter and whipped at your skin.

“What’s going on?” You asked quietly.

He looked away from you, letting out a deep sigh. You watched his every move, noticing the fast pace of his breath.

“I- I just. I’m going to miss you.” He whispered, his voice wobbling.

You couldn’t respond as he pulled you into a bone-crushing hug, knocking the air from your lungs. You quickly reciprocated the embrace, wrapping your arms around his middle. He nuzzled his face into your neck, wetting the t-shirt you wore. Now you knew he was crying. He was practically shaking in your arms, and you couldn’t help but feel tears of your own fill your eyes.

Mike was all you’ve known for a decade, your dearest friend. You’d be moving in with strangers and having to start from scratch. In all the excitement, you didn’t realize that you would be leaving him alone. You sniffled as you cried harder.

“I’m not leaving forever, you can visit. And you’ll always be my best friend.”

He scoffed into your shoulder, momentarily stunning you. Had you said something? Was he not wanting to visit? Your mind raced as he was silent.

“Jesus, I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since we were kids.” He said, almost knocking the wind out of you.

What the hell was he talking about? Your world shattered as he held you closer, crying a little more into your shirt. You weren’t sure what to say. He was saying everything you’d wanted to hear at the worst moment. You’d be states away from him for years.

You pulled him closer with a hand on the back of his neck, feeling hot tears run down your cheeks. You laughed a little at the irony, a back-door confession at its finest. You responded quickly, the words leaving your mouth before your brain could catch up.

“I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing because I have to leave in a few hours and I’ve loved you ever since I’ve known you.”

He shook in your hands as he cried harder.

“Great timing, huh?” He joked softly.

You let out a silent laugh that turned into a sigh. Looking at the dreary view of your neighborhood after dark, you imagined a world where you weren’t the scared sixteen-year-old girl who couldn’t make eye contact with him for a week after realizing she liked him. Would you have been able to have a few good years? You imagined him asking you to prom, kissing him goodbye in the school parking lot, cuddling on couches when it would mean something.

“This sucks.” You muttered.

“Absolutely.” He responded, pulling himself off of your neck so he could see you. He gave you a sad smile, holding your face in his hand, as he swiped your tears away with his thumb.

You looked at each other for a moment, not sure what to say. Then his mouth was on yours, your eyes closing out of instinct. It was complete desperation; wet and salty from the crying that the two of you had been doing. You pulled him closer, feeling something warm pool in your stomach. He held you closer in his hands.

You might not have had any idea of what you were supposed to do after this, or what it meant for the two of you, but all that mattered was this moment. His scent, his taste, and the way he felt on your lips. Thoughts of road trips and unpacking were forgotten, the only thing that surrounded you was Mike.

———————————————————————————-

** i still don’t give you permission to use my work as your own. this belongs to @joemothersfavoritechild **

[cloudinterlude]

I get to dump all my Steve Rogers takes here!

I barely know where to start! I guess in general, Steve's character arc in the MCU is straight up depressing. Like, I didn't fully realize until I re-watched the movies how tragic his story is. I mean, the end of his first movie is him sacrificing himself for the world, freezing to death and waking up 70 years later where his entire world is completely gone and everyone he knows is dead and only TWO WEEKS LATER he has to suck it up and lead the Avengers into battle in Avengers 1. That's insane! We don't really get a lot of superhero character-centered movies with such hopeless endings like that. His last lines are "I think I missed a date" - That's dark when you really think about what it was like in that very moment to realize what's happening to him.

And going into his second movie, his current world is tilted once again. He's been unknowingly working for HYDRA who he lost his life fighting against, who he hates more than anything and everything quickly goes to shit when he realizes that his absolute best friend was alive but being tortured for the 70 years he was asleep. The only person in the entire world who could possibly relate to him a little bit - the only person who knew him before he was "worth" knowing doesn't even remember him because Steve dropped him. All that guilt and horror is way too hard to imagine. There's a lot more to say about TWS but God...yeah, horrific.

And Civil War...His world is tilted AGAIN. I cannot explain to you or anyone else how absolutely gobsmacked I was when I came out of that movie loving Steve Rogers just to find out everyone fucking hated him. I am very obviously team Cap, but only because I agree with his position, his actions and his morals. Imagine you just found out the government is HYDRA and now some rando (Ross) walks in with your teammate in tow to tell you to sign over all your civil rights to the government that will not only put you in danger but also set a dangerous standard for how enhanced people can be treated. I read what was in the Accords (and Steve was the only character on-screen looking over it). It's beyond reprehensible. I wouldn't sign it either especially since it was sprung up on the whole team with only 3 days to review it. Despite that, Steve was open to the idea of signing it as long as safeguards were put into place (he explicitly states this)...until he found out that they were somehow already enforcing the damn thing by keeping Wanda in internment. So, since the only two options are sign this or retire - he leaves. During all this he learns that Peggy dies, goes to her funeral, deals with Bucky being framed.

[I just found this deep in my drafts and realized I'm never finishing this jkdshfkjsdf, so here y'all go! <3 TLDR Steve's life is a big ball of pain and he deals with it better than any other character or person would and honestly, I don't blame him for any of the deicions he decided to take because he deserves the space, time, and freedom to do whatever tf he wants after his tragedy we call a life.]

[spymeister]

OOC Post here:

TF1 spoilers, if you haven't already seen it- below the cut.

Please keep in mind that these are just my opinions, and it did not deviate from the fact that I enjoyed the fuck out of it, and would happily see it again. I'm pretty much placing it RIGHT below the Bumblebee movie, which is my all time favorite Live-action TF movie.

Most of my nitpicks are kinda lore and technical based, which I know couldn't be touched on because they ONLY had an hour and a half to extrapolate a tragic love story caused by the Narrative™.

So, all in all. Pretty solid movie. I'm well aware it's geared towards kids and preteens, though most of us are well beyond that. So, just to be succinct- here is my pros and cons:

Pros:

Excellent world-setting. I loved the look and living nature of Cybertron as a planet, and how it was presented.

HOLY SHIT FLYING TRAINS THAT MAKE THEIR OWN RAILS, HOW IS THAT NOT COOL.

Cyber. Fauna. BRUH. We got Crysdeer, we got a pseudo-organic styled surface. SURFACE. THIS IS SO NEAT.

The fact that iacon made me think of Coruscant made me laugh.

The first mention of the thirteen Primes since Primeverse, and also IDW. Spot on. Well done.

No humans. Don't get me wrong, I do love the human side kicks, but it was SO NICE to see just the bots for once.

HOMELANDER. AS. SENTINEL. TOP NOTCH.

Elita is my fucking role model and I will not take no for an answer. I loved her so. so. so much. ALSO ARACHNID. HOLY SHIT, HOW AWESOME. I LOVED THE USE OF THE EYES AAAAAAHHHHH.

Cons:

Didn't care how quickly they pigeonholed Megatron in the bad guy for the narrative. I do understand that this is a MUCH younger, angrier Megatron- but at the same time, I really feel like we didn't get much of an explanation. I hope that maybe a movie novelization or comic might kind of go deeper in to that.

Chris Hemsworth, not a bad OP, but we had better options, IMO.

How the fuck did Sentinel get a jump on the Primes? Why didn't we get more info about the Primes. I could legit watch an entire movie based around all of that and Cybertronian prehistory.

T-cogs. Nitpicky, but I reeeeaaaally feel like that should have been somewhere other than the chest.

[jenna-of-eluria]

Why is no one talking about how Chani is completely different in Villeneuve’s adaptation? I love the change, I think it’s true to her character and true her reaction to Paul’s sudden turn to imperialist warmongering/political plotting. I can’t wait to see what she does next.

Chani as the faithful true wife who just idly sits by while Paul does his thing is one of my many gripes with the original story.

I was kinda bummed they eschewed the spice orgy scene. I wonder how people who never read the books would react knowing it was supposed to be there.

Rapid fire thoughts:

I didn’t like how much power Jessica had, really liked how Giedi Prime was depicted, this film could just be called Zendaya stares down the camera menacingly, I guess they’re saving momoa’s reincarnation for the next film, the way they depicted Stilgar’s group justifying Paul’s actions was - even if unintentional - funny af and the whole theater laughed every time I wonder if Villeneuve did that on purpose, Florence Pugh ugh what a vision, the costumes in this movie better win an award, why tf weren’t Gurney’s eyes blue? Man’s been on Dune the whole damn time, matter of fact how come half the shots of people their eyes don’t look blue? I saw this movie in IMAX shouldn’t it be extremely clear if their eyes are blue?

I’m sure I’ll have more thoughts but like. It was an experience. Things that should have taken longer to develop went by SO fast (Paul and the water of life) things that should have been shortened dragged on forever (why was Rabban in this movie so much damn).

The big takeaway was just how forcefully Paul pushed back against his destiny. Pretty sure in the books he’s resistant in the way a five year old resists taking medicine but then finally accepts - 5 mins later they are back to watching Caillou and sipping juice or whatever. THIS Paul was scratching and clawing to keep his fremen life. He did everything to keep from going south. He even cried over it which is insane in this universe.

I’m interested to see where this goes tbh. I think it’ll be much better than the original (thank fuck for that).

[iamfabiloz]

hi idk anything about transformers which i think means you should educate me . eye emoji

GOES NUTS i was abt to finish what i typed n posted but i lost my og draft ACK!! sorry this took a bit to answer i wanted to answer properly EEEE TY FOR ASKING I LOVE THE ROBOTS!!!!

BASICALLYY the transformers r alien robots from the planet cybertron!! they are fighting a civil war and eventually all the fighting wrecks the planet n the battle gets moved 2 earth!! there r two sides, the good guys called the autobots (led by a guy called optimus prime he is popular n beloved in the franchise n fandom) and the evil bad guys r called the Decepticons!! they are led by their evil leader Megatron!! OP and megs are sworn enemies n fight sm, the wars been going on for like over 4 million years (these guys live a LONGGG time) on earth, the autobots r nicer and treat the humans better than the cons anyways (tho no bot/con is rlly pure their like all war criminals LMAOOO) u would not BELIEVEE their mfing drama!! the pettyness of these mech mfs fr

ANYWAYZZ another rlly cool thing abt the series is the many canon queer bots!!! :D their mostly in the idw comics tho, such as the comic series 'more than meets than the eye' and lost light' which features multiple main characters who r gay and have a bunch of mlm relationships, as well as lost light having some t4t lesbians who r prominent EEE it so cool to see!! another example of transgenderformers is in the newest show 'transformers earthspark' which features one of the main characters who is nonbinary!! their sooo cool :]!!

now AHEM some recommendations r below for tf shows that I rlly like (NO PRESSURE TO WATCH/CONSUME ANY OF THESE THO!! i just rlly always like linking tf stuff it makes me happy :3 i wont mind at all if these just sit here foreva i just am like YAYY when i have to find linkies it is very fun!!)

the first tf show I ever watched is Transformers Prime!! I’d def start here bc it’s good for beginners new to the series, has lore, action, rlly good characters r plot!! Very dearly beloved by the fandom :] has three seasons n a movie! links to view it 4 free below:

YouTube Playlist with all eps + Movie

Seasons 2-3 on tubitv.com (Season 1 is on U.S Netflix if you have, idk why season 1 isn’t on tubi 🤔)

(ALSO THE ORIGINAL 80s G1 SHOW IS ON TUBI AS WELL, it is very funny i like it even tho i havent finished all the way EE)

If u want smth short I’d also recommend TRANSFORMERS EARTHSPARK!!! It’s ongoing tho, not fully finished like Prime, n is the newest tf show as of late, but it’s proven to be wonderful so far and I’ve actually gotten people who haven’t seen any tf stuff before to watch it and they’ve been fine and liked it HEHEEH :3 only 18 eps rn, here is my google drive w all the eps so far if u want!

other shows that I have links to watch to r:

Transformers Animated (3 seasons, 2d animated, more stylized, very fun)

Transformers Cyberverse (3 seasons and two 40 minute specials more kiddy and not as serious and a little shallower than the other shows, but I really enjoyed it, it was so so funny and it was my top tf thing for a while before Earthspark stole my heart 😨 cyberverse season 3 has no right to go so hard)

and the idw comics can be read on readcomiconline.li (tho beware of the weird ads n pop ups if u go on here, their rlly AAA so its best viewed w adblock) theres some mlp and transformers crossover comics on there also THEIR SO GOOD AND FUN i dont think u need any prior knowledge to enjoy them tbh their great

ty again for letting me explode abt robots

[connorgreens]

guessing the ilw crew's favorite movie genres:

lincoln: for some reason i see lincoln being into dramas, especially crime dramas. i'm thinking along the lines of fight club and taxi driver. but he's also a secret fan of anime movies, because he used to watch them when he was younger and now they're nostalgic to him

abel: we know he likes indiana jones, so i'm guessing he's an action/adventure type of guy. he probably prefers movies to be on the lighthearted side, and cries at movies with sad endings. he also probably genuinely enjoys watching historical documentaries

jocelyn: i feel like jocelyn can't resist a good horror comedy. it has to be a very specific type of comedy though, because she can't stand bigoted jokes in any way shape or form. movies with strong female leads like jennifer's body or heathers are right up her street

amalia: amalia is tough because i haven't played her route yet but i'm gonna go out on a limb and say she loves a good documentary. they're the only movies she'll choose to watch on her own, because she likes to feel like she's learning and being productive even if the documentary isn't meant to be educational. i can see her being really into true crime docs, but only if they focus on the victims rather than the killers

bonus because i'm having too much fun with this:

connor: connor strikes me as both an action movie dude and a comedy dude, but i also think he's the type of person who can watch anything and enjoy it. i feel like a lot of what he watches is just stuff his friends recommend, because he trusts their judgement more than his own about stuff like this

noah: noah is a total fantasy nerd but he would never admit it out loud. he tells everyone he likes horror movies, which isn't technically a lie, but if it's between lord of the rings and friday the 13th i think he would absolutely pick lotr. also, his stuffed moose is named "kenna" which im assuming is a reference to tc&tf (an in game fantasy tv show), so that pretty much confirms my theory

genuine!mc: i think genuine!mc would enjoy romantic comedies. anything sweet that can make them laugh is a good movie in their book, if it's corny and cute they've likely seen it. they don't like sad or heavy movies, and much like abel, will cry if a movie has a sad ending

sarcastic!mc: sarcastic!mc likes watching so-bad-it's-good movies in the spirit of making fun of them. they don't take any movies too seriously and are probably the type to commentate over anything they watch, whether alone or with other people

aggressive!mc: i feel like aggressive!mc is a big fan of horror movies, the gorier the better. they don't get scared very easily and will make fun of the movie if they think it's boring or the effects are lame. i also think they like to talk during movies, unless they're really invested

ilitw!mc: this one is also tough but i'm gonna say ilitw!mc likes action/thriller movies, although they will watch literally anything as long as it has a compelling plot. they probably prefer watching movies with people to watching them alone, and they're pretty chill about letting others pick the movie, so they've probably seen a variety of films in different genres

[istherewifiinhell]

[Chin in my hand. tilting head back in forth] no its just like. is anyone else a sicko enough to watch that tf 86 without me telling u more about it.... its only an hour 25. took me like 3 cause. im Unwell. this is the emotion they gave kids in the 80s isnt it. what in the god damn. what did they put in this shit...

Okay well i dont actually care what other people do but a lot of what im getting out of this is based on. knowing only meagerly more than if i was there when it was happening. so. thats the angle.

okay the most important thing i could lead with its not flashing light free. unfortunate tho unsurprising

how to get into this... what im. doing here. is i think entrusting myself to the absurd. and letting myself go with it. and how much i can care (the answer is usually. very much). so. this installment:

Transformers: The Movie. 1986. what is it?

It's 80s kid's movie shit. Aggressively so. pure. saturated. 80 proof. directly into my brain stem. And I'm a fucking sicko for it.

It is... the movie that is technically based on the 84-87 show. I mean. it is that. Its the same world, its the same continuity…. i assume. I had to watch it before starting season 3. What awaits me there, I do not know.

It is also the hypothetical "he is so outside of the original scope of the material the text no longer offers guidance on whether or not He would fucking say that".

…I exaggerate but the movie is... different enough in tone and situation, and but of course, character cast, that it's more in the realm of value add to seen the show than. Necessity. The cross over characters with the most screen time are, I think, the dino bots. and i love the dino bots. but, you get their gist.

was new toy opportunities: (characters, accessories, locations for play sets), obviously.

What I knew going in was: that its better animated. darker. and that characters…. Die!

so in general what i expected to see, and did receive

new lore: the shit keeps popping outta the ground anytime they have to readdress the transformers home planet, cybertron. even in the show. just suddenly. randomly. take some [conflicting to previous examples] lore.

general kid movie tropes and goofing

… the character death thing. more on that later

I'll touch on animation. cause. ofc. for context. im sicko. im. silly guy but. people aren't lying about the show's animation quality. that sort of thing doesn't bother me so much, but more than just. looking jank. It also effects like editing and shot/scene construction it a way that can be. noticeable to jarring. so the movie is a treat cause its not just a upgrade to theatrical animation (which. when considering comparable weight classes, just IS gonna be a step up from television) but on top of that you just get overall better flow and continuity.

BUT that, does not exclude it from old kids movie WILD tone/scene swings. From fun goofy action, to the horrors, to main plot action, to grief, to funny comedic bit characters. It is, I imagine, exactly as it intends to be… and I fault it not an iota. It's very funny to me to just. experience it and let that happen. Especially considering its still delivering on cool ass scifi visuals, just big beautiful impossible machinery, and nice action scenes even when being goofy as shit.

The easiest thing to mention I did NOT expect. the soundtrack. hol lee shittttt. the synths are hitting, the guitars are shredding, old rock men are crooning. like think of the phil collin's disney movies. times. a thousand. a million. I'm listening to right now writing this. Bangers.

SO that's I think, my vaguest recommendation for the movie. Fun to look at and listen to, big robot aliens face adversity and strange situations and hopefully come out on top to the killer score. I'm a simple man. Do experience childlike wonder from time to time. And regardless I really just enjoy the amusement I get from corny shit.

Specifics

Setting: So this is not the world state of the show, of two battling forces stationed in headquarters on earth foiling each other. They do this with a time skip as denoted by the resident human character, Spike, now having a son!

This future state of affairs has "new cybertron", a city on earth. I really like that, its a good vibe for like, aliens are real, they're here and some are our friends (and also maybe. losing the war on their home planet. just a tad). And equally cool vibe, our bots have two moon bases, (their moons, not ours), hunkering down as more rebellious force, than an equal power. And this is where most of the classic show characters are stationed. Including Spike, in a transforming mech suit. That's just fun.

Lore/Plot: Were the robots in disguise not weird enough for you? Okay, how's this. A giant robotic planet eater (is a robot and eats robotic planets specifically it seems). Voiced by Orson Welles.... OKAY. So, incalculable powerful? Pretty much, but there's one thing he's weak to.

The matrix. No, not that one. This Matrix is a big, glowy. thing. That the leader of the autobots carries. It's said to. Light the way in darkness, and has something to do with... "Till are are one" or becoming one with it when you die? Unclear. Its magic, its good, its only for the pure of heart. Etc. Antithesis to big robot planet eaters, I guess. It also uh. confers… prime-ness? No never mind how the show said Optimus Prime was just a normal smaller guy and then got built back different. Magic Box.

Tone/Story: so ive dragged it on long enough. if you've heard of this movie. this is probably why. they KILL CHARACTERS! There getting shot, murdered, general, combat things. Also execution. And being planet eaten. Those sick action sequences to even sicker jams. As your beloved toys are slaughtered. Notably Optimus and Megatron have it out, for real for real. Primes grievously wounded, Megatron's fucked up after falling SEVERAL stories. Which leads to leadership change on both sides. Cause, prime fucking DIES! DEATHBED SCENE! Dad of the autobots, gone. Countless children, traumatized. And this adult in 2023, moved, also.

And Megatron? Instead of dying surround by loved ones, gets picked up by the planet eater. Is it a Faustian deal if your options are "work for me and destroy the magic box of power. Or die an agonizing death"? The deal also nets him a forced rebuild, new name, and... being voiced by Leonard Nimoy for the rest of the film? New game plus Megatron goes a bit harder than original flavour, killing Starscream (Rip baby girl your coronation outfit was nice). Though it does not totally subsume his character, just any time he tries to get out of it, and even wanting to team up with the heroes, the robot god turns on the agonizing death mode again. Cowabummer, dude.

THE SILLIES: This might sound like a crazy thing OR you might be well versed in the art of kids movie yourself and get this picture. Those are some pretty GRIM and heady details I pulled out. But, did I mention there's a weird al song in this? You couldn't find a better thesis statement than it's title: Dare to be Stupid. It's fucking dance parties with. australian? junk bots "batteries not included" style speaking in TV commercial gimmick characters. There's some little freak who speaks in rhymes. The hero of this movie is called HOT ROD. He's almost executed by being fed to robot sharks. But hes not, because the DINO BOTS come save him :D.

So i'm saying, if people have this idea that you can only come to old kids media if you were there. Cause, the nostalgia and history you have. You like remembering confronting serious emotions as a kid, characters that find the will to go on. To be brave and kind. And the enjoyment outta sick fights and crying cause it was too sad. And everything else is just the baggage. Dead weight.

Well, I dunno! I still like it! I can see the animation errors (of course there still there, do you know how many drawing make up a movie?) But I also like cell animation were you see the smudges. There's annoying characters, there's jarring needle drops. There's... baw weep gran nah weep ni ni bong. But. Movies can be good AND be stupid. You don't gotta choose between only completely sincere first order enjoyment, or ironic amusement. I wanna do the secret third thing. And, so, I'll be out here acting a fool! And I'll have a good time.

I think, in general, I really like being surprised by media. And I know how to expect bad media. I did not know how to expect this, though. This beautiful mess. This lovely thing. It has fed my heart and soul. Cause it's fun.

[cookie-waffle]

My thoughts on Rise of the Beasts (spoilers)

Not as good as Bumblebee and was a bit too fast paced in places. But, still about a million times better than the Bay sequels. It’s a perfectly serviceable Transformers movie and, honestly? That’s pretty good for a live action TF movie.

Best part for me were how lively the bots were. The movies are def getting better at writing them like actual characters and not just shoving them to the sidelines for the majority of the run time. I do think the human stuff dragged on for a bit too long at first, but, it’s still a lot better at not taking away most the attention from the bots than most of the Bay films were.

Mirage was hot okay I’m gonna kiss him. And Nightbird actually getting to be in a movie was fucking AWESOME. This also had to have been the most well written Optimus Prime in the movies so far. He’s angry, yes, but this time he’s not threatening to kill humans and he’s still trying his damn hardest to be a good leader. Also, that smile at the end added like 13 more years to my life.

And speaking of the characters expressing, they are SO MUCH more emotive than in the Bay films. (MAJOR SPOILER COMING UP)

Primal having to kill Airrazor was so heartbreaking, largely due to the fact that he was actually showing visible grief while doing it. He didn’t just shoot her and then say something like, “aw man that was my friend. I’m sad.”. The scene actually tried to give the audience a genuine emotional impact.

All in all: This felt like I was watching Transformers. As in, the show/comics. Which is exactly what I asked for, so I can’t really complain too much. I do wish the story had better pacing and that it was as good as Bumblebee, but, compared to most other TF films, it’s pretty enjoyable.

My only major complaint is that they retconned a PERFECT character design for Wheeljack and replaced it with one that looked absolutely nothing like Wheeljack. But, pretty much everyone has already complained about that.

[cookie-waffle-art-and-stuff]

my honest opinions on all the Transformers films so far:

- 1986: This one is just fun. Objectively, it’s probably not a “good” movie. But the 2D animation is great, the art direction is gorgeous, and it’s just all around a fun romp. Ntm the music being the best out of any of the movies, imo. I absolutely adore how colorful and energetic this movie is.

- First Bay film: Good movie, very poor adaptation of the source material. If you want to watch a fun action flick with really good CGI that still holds up to this day, then you’ll probably like it. I just don’t think it adapted the cartoons or comics very well at all, and the character designs are objectively bad.

- Revenge of the Fallen: This movie is probably objectively the worst one, but not my least favorite. RotF was made during a writer’s strike, meaning Bay had to write it himself. And lemme tell ya, it SHOWS. At some points, this movie is so goddamn stupid that it loops back around to being funny. Character designs are still awful, and this movie also started the trend of writing Optimus Prime EXTREMELY out of character.

- Age of Extinction: I actually liked this movie as a kid, but as I grew older I started to see a LOT of issues. The character designs this time around were actually somewhat improved, and the autobots were actually really fun to watch. But those moments were way too few and far between. Also the age gap thing with the teenage human character was uh…. weird as shit

- The Last Knight: Good lord… was this a bad one. This is the first TF movie that I didn’t like since I first first I saw it in theaters. It was also the first TF film to ever bore me. There was clearly SOME genuine transformers fans working on this film and contributing ideas. But NONE of them actually felt relevant to the story. There are also several characters who are there for just no goddamn reason at all. Theres just… so much wrong with this one that I honestly can’t fit it all here without making this post too bad.

- Bumblebee: An actual, genuine, honest-to-god GOOD movie. There was so much passion and heart put into this film and it shows. I’m just sad that it’s not nearly as popular as the others, because most people think it’s another Bay movie, when it’s actually a reboot. It’s also the first live action TF movie with good character designs. It’s technically a period piece, since it’s set in 1986, which I absolutely love.

- Rise of the Beasts: This movie really got the shit end of the stick. People didn’t watch because, again, they thought it was another Bay film. It is nowhere near as bad as the box office sales would lead you to believe. It’s not as good as Bumblebee, but way better than the Bay sequels. And there’s some actual emotional weight with the bots in this film too. I do think that there was a bit too much human-only screen time, but the bots were still very likable and visually appealing. My only actual major complaint about the character designs is that they completely retconned Wheeljack’s G1-inspired design for no reason whatsoever.

- Transformers One: Straight up, this is the best one so far. It’s SO good. The animation and art direction is outstanding, the writing is good, and the characters are super fun. You really don’t even have to be a Transformers fan to enjoy this film, as it basically shows you everything you need to know at the beginning and throughout the film, anyway. It’s an amazing adaptation and probably the first (non-comedy) western PG13 animated movie I’ve ever seen in theaters. Western animation tends to really lack in making any animated movies that are a rating above PG13, unless it’s an adult comedy. So it’s actually incredibly refreshing to see a western-made PG13 animated movie that isn’t an adult comedy