#BEST BUY BLENDER

[predoom]

[wastelandhell]

[likeswallowstosea]

I'll hopefully be on to rp either tomorrow or this weekend, I'm so sick I'm surviving on strawberry banana smoothies I make in my dorm room today.

[emryste]

31/12/2024 poor health affected me harder this year, but i look forward to continuing to push myself to improve artistically in 2025, and onwards

[mordacitatis]

i am notoriously the worst at taking progress pictures so here's one while im thinking of it!

today, we're making paper (hopefully)

at the boil to agitate the 100% cotton cloth i sliced and diced (with the help my my handy fabric pizza cutter device)

[godofthestupid]

currently torturing my crappy laptop that definetly did not even dream of ever having to be used for 3d programms by messing around in blender

[jinit-shah]

Orpat HHB-187E HM White Hand Blender with Hand Mixer | Orpat Group

Buy Orpat HHB-187E HM White Hand Blender with Hand Mixer, check the specifications and details at orpatgroup.com

https://orpatgroup.com/product/hand-blender-with-hand-mixer-hhb-187e-hm-400w-white/

[kitchenappliancesnz]

Discover the Finest Online Selection of High-Quality Blenders for Crafting Delicious Smoothies

This blender trio has an interchangeable power pod that can be used with any of the attachments: the 48 oz. pitcher for blending smoothies, the 40 oz. bowl for food processing and meal prep, and the 16 oz. chopper bowl to evenly mince herbs and nuts. All containers have convenient storage lids and are dishwasher-safe, which means clean-up a breeze.  Visit : blender in nz

[ribbonprincess]

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

"Do a lil twirl for me,yeah...your ass looks so good baby." Rafe chuckles,fixing his pants as they tightened around his crotch,the sight of you in a tiny white mini skirt the reason.

"You like it rafey? I bought It thinking of you" "yeah,no shit- you used my credit card" he chuckles. Moving from his spot on the bed,he walks over you,laying his hands on your hips as he squishes the skin. "You should wear it today while I go golfing,you can look pretty in the cart and if you're good enough daddy will buy you a drink."

He smiles before tilting his head down to press his lips against yours as you whine almost immediately,slapping his chest "my lipgloss! you just smeared it all over,daddy." Turning around to face the mirror as you try to deescalate the situation of your almost ruined makeup,dabbing at the area around your lips with a beauty blender.

"Yeah yeah,'s just lip gloss,it's nothing serious." Gasping dramatically you turn around,hand on your chest as if you've been shot as you point a finger at his chest "'s not just lipgloss.."

Chuckling to himself Rafe presses a kiss against your shoulder "I'm sorry cupcake, daddy's being mean yeah?" Nodding as you run your manicured fingers over his jawline,pressing your chest against his,making your tits more visible as you smile softly- a tragic contrast to your action.

꒦꒷︶°꒷︶°︶₊˚ʚɞ˚₊︶°︶꒦˚︶꒷꒦

As you sit prettily in the golf cart,sipping at your drink while watching rafe play with his friends,you can't help but feel lonely,so you decide to approach as he stands a few feet behind the others. "rayray?"

Turning around almost immediately Rafe's expression softens a bit before turning hard. "What are you doing here,told you to sit in the cart" "Yeah... I know,but I missed you" Emphasizing your words you run a hand over his chest,playing with the button of his slacks.

"Missed me huh?" Looking over his shoulder he shouts a quick "Little lady is feeling sick!" Before dragging you over the Golf cart and driving over a more secluded area of the field,covered by trees and bushes.

"Since you've been missing me sooo much,might as well show it. C'mon get on your knees" Taking one last look around you move to your knees on the moist grass,quickly unbuckling his belt as you pull down his pants and boxer just as much needed. Wrapping a hand around the base of his shaft you kiss the vein that runs on the underside of it, resulting in a harsh tug of your hair. "Don't fucking tease me."

Wrapping your lips around his tip before slowly moving down,twisting your hand around what you couldn't fit "Deeper...I've trained you better than this,kid" Rafe mumble from above you,shoving your head down until you gag harshly,tears already pooling at your lash line. "Yeah,there you go...nice and warm for me." Looking up through your clamped wispy lashes you start to move your head again,twirling your tongue around his length like a popsicle as Rafe groans from above you "Got myself the best girl,right? Sucking my dick like this where everyone can pass by"

Nodding as best as you can,you pull off him with a loud "pop". "Wanna make you feel good,daddy." Smiling to himself, Rafe wipes at your saliva coated lower lip before bringing your mouth back on him with a satisfied moan,brushing some strand of hair that have fallen over your face away. "Fuck,keep doing that and I'm gonna cum. You want daddy to cum in your mouth? Yeah,you do."

Meeting you midway as he thrust into your mouth,giving you no time to react or even understand. "shit- 'm cumming" As his rhythm gets sloppier,you suck around his tip holding onto his thigh as you feel a milky substance flood your mouth. Breathing loudly he pulls you away from him as he smirks "Show me your tongue,angel" showcasing your tongue with a proud smile you look up at him in search of praise. "good girl,what do we say now?" "thank you daddy!"

[dacrystalsim]

TS3 Functional Closet Mod

The idea for this mod started with my want to convert TS2 Apartment Life closet. I could have used the Supernatural wardrobe as a base, but I wanted the doors to have proper animations and the ability to function like real closet doors against the wall, similar to how doors work in the game. So, this mod was created! 😊

What is this mod?

This mod functions as a dresser but includes a new animation that allows the doors to slide open like an actual closet. When the closet opens and closes, the Sim plays an idle animation, and when changing clothes, they use the spin animation.

The mod includes two different types, depending on the closet:

Dresser Type – Offers the same interactions as the base game dresser. This type is best for closets without mirrors.

Mirror Type – Includes interactions from the vanity table in Supernatural and Showtime (Don’t worry, the mod is 100% base game compatible!).

Important! This mod does not add a closet object to the game by itself. It only provides the necessary functionality for closet objects to work properly!

The Closet Object:

As mentioned earlier, this mod was created because I wanted to convert TS2 closet. The conversion is included with the mod, and you're welcome to use it as a base for creating your own closets! 😊

The closet comes in three different versions:

Opaque

Mirror – This version is split into two parts: the closet and a separate mirror for the animated door. To use it properly, simply place the mirror on the closet—it will slot into place and move with the door 😊

Glass

Both merged and unmerged versions are included—please install only one! (The merged file does not include the mod itself.)

How to Install?

Place the mod and the closet objects in your Mods/Packages folder.

Download links:

[SFS] | [MTS]

Credits: EA/Maxis, Blender, SimPE, S3PE, S3OC, TSRW, ILSpy, Visual Studio 2022 and Battery for the Script Mod Template Creator. Special thanks: @zoeoe-sims, @deniisu-sims, TS3CreatorCave discord server for all the help and Bloom from simlogical for creating a mirror door that I used as a reference to figure out how to make the closet move with the mirror ❤ @xto3conversionsfinds @pis3update @kpccfinds

Additional information, CASTable channels, polycount and how to make your own closet under the cut.

How to Create Your Own Closet?

Choose the version you'd like to clone as your base and ensure the OBJK is set correctly in S3PE for the closet type you want.

For a closet without a mirror: Sims3.Gameplay.Objects.ShelvesStorage.Crystal.Closet

For a closet with a mirror: Sims3.Gameplay.Objects.ShelvesStorage.Crystal.ClosetMirror

Polycount:

The 3 versions share the same polycount. LOD 0 (High Detail): 2430 LOD 1 (Medium Detail): 1070

Additional Info:

The closets are found under Storage -> Dressers in Buy Mode.

The original TS2 catalog description and price.

The meshes were UV edited to make them CASTable.

The package files are compressed.

[pequins]

𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

• doting to the point of annoyance. do you need anything? are you comfortable? are you hungry? thirsty? did you take prenatals today?do you want a blanket? you need a blanket.

• absolutely clueless about what he’s doing, but he’d put on an act like he knows what he’s doing, secretly calling his mom for step-by-step instructions.

• tells everyone you’re pregnant. random cashier? their pregnant btw!

• talking to your tummy as soon as he finds out you’re pregnant and swears the baby can hear him.

• “i will love you forever, unless you’re a red sox fan.”

• definitely forces the baby to listen to his christmas album

• starts referring to you as ‘momma’ much to your dismay

• suggests baby names like ‘blender’ and ‘playbutton’

• stays up for hours on google researching ‘what to do when pregnant’ and giving himself anxiety.

• his research leads him to believe that you need to be in bed! all the time!

• he attends all your appointments and somehow gets more emotional than you

• absolutely pretends like he knows more than your obstetrician, google said so.

• already practicing his horrible dad jokes

• "what did the ocean say to the beach?" "what?" "nothing, it just waved."

• takes pictures and videos of your bump, every. single. day.

• nests harder than you do, buys unnecessary gadgets, organizes baby clothes that wont fit by month 2.

• tries to paint the nursery himself but accidentally getting paint all over himself and the walls.. and the carpet.

• definitely bought himself a ‘worlds best dad’ mug

[milf-harrington]

i read a fic yesterday (return of the king) where Steve swapped with Eddie at the last second at the end of s4 and ended up being the one who died and had to be left behind and then he came back as a vampire and it just got my brain TICKING.

So role-reversal AU where steve is the one who comes back basically kas-ified as is the common trope with eddie, but where eddie goes to steve, steve goes to robin.

lets say, for funsies, that they managed to kill vecna and max only ended up hospitalised for a broken elbow and a twisted ankle (from falling on it), so everyone has the time and space to grieve.

Steve’s death hits Robin the hardest because he was her person. He was her i-wish-we-could-just-merge-into-one-being. Her ride or die. Her soulmate. And he’d been taken from her, torn apart and left to rot in the very world he’d tried so hard to protect her from. 

The others give her space to let her mourn quietly in her bedroom, dressed in steve’s clothes and listening to his music like if she just tried hard enough she could still merge them together and let him use her lungs to breathe, her heart to pump his blood, her head to share his thoughts. that she could single handedly go from a me to a we.

And then, one day, Robin starts acting weird. She doesn’t know the Wheeler’s phone number and on her way to find it in the phone book, she found the Munson’s first, and when Eddie picks up it’s too a very chipper Robin asking for a lift to the shops where she proceeds to buy an alarming amount of red meat and refuses to answer any questions.

And she’s just- happy. She’s weird and happy and keeps calling Eddie to ask him about Dungeons and Dragons lore and if he can take her to the library or to the butcher and if he can let her borrow his jumper please? I get cold easily. And then she just keeps stealing clothes, from everyone. Sometimes she asks, sometimes she’ll just take a jacket off of the back of a chair and act like nothing happened, sometimes she just sneaks off to go rooting through washing baskets.

Then comes the day she invites Eddie over, probably a week or so after her initial journey into Weird-Ville, nervously rambling about nothing right up until she closes the front door behind them and runs into Eddie’s back because Eddie’s just spotted Steve-fucking-Harrington peering at him from around the corner. 

Apparently, a not-exactly-dead-anymore Steve crawled through Robin’s window one night and has since taken up residence underneath her bed. 

“He was kinda- not all there, at first.” She tells him, chopping a steak into cubes and dropping them into a blender. Steve, winged and fanged and tailed, leans against the counter and watches her with sleepy eyes. “But we’ve been working on it.”

After the initial pants-shitting shock of having her dead best friend re-appear as a creature of the upside down, Robin had simply accepted it and moved on. Happy to have Steve back no matter what it looked like. 

And what it looked like was blending raw meat, and reading together in the bathroom to bring back his ability to talk, and stealing clothes for the veritable nest Steve was building in her closet. The next step in her plan to re-domesticate her best friend, had been to introduce him to another person: Eddie, evidently. 

Steve promptly spends 5 minutes being a feral little creature, scenting Eddie within an inch of his life like he’d done to Robin, and then attempting to plant him in his nest like a little ornament. 

Just. idk. feral kas!steve seeking out robin for safety, who slowly re-introduces him to his humanity and then his future boyfriend.

[saveyourblood]

Roll the Dice (Buddie x Reader)

Summary: Buck makes a humming noise, rubbing his lips in thought. “I could do it.” You and Eddie share a look. Eddie is the first to test the waters. “Do what?” “Give someone a lap dance.” The one where you're best friends with Buck and Eddie, the three of you are drunk, and the topic of lap dances comes up.

Word Count: 2.4k Prompt (from @happyhauntt): buddie and reader are hanging out and drinking maybe and maybe they're watching magic mike as a joke or they had a call to a strip club earlier that day and buck asks reader who they think would give a better lapdance, buck or eddie, reader bluescreens and they both give a demonstration. A/N: This was such a fun write! Thanks for letting me steal your idea, Ollie! You can find their work on AO3 too. :^) Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays everyone! Warnings: Spice (not smut), drinking, mentions of vomiting

It started with beer. 

Well, it started with the boys drinking beer. 

You’ve never been a big fan of beer. You’ll occasionally indulge in something on tap at a fancy bar, but other than that, it isn’t your drink. And that cheap shit that Buck buys at the corner store? Absolutely not. 

So, it started with the boys drinking beer and you drinking a canned cocktail. 

See, Buck may have bad taste, but he has a good heart. He always has a 6-pack of cheap beer in his fridge, but since you started coming over, you notice he always has a 12-pack of ready-to-drink canned cocktails. You know he doesn’t drink them; he buys them for you. 

You really don’t drink that much, in terms of both frequency and amount. It takes a singular drink for you to feel a nice buzz, and really, that’s all you need. You’ve never had the desire to get blackout drunk, and more than three drinks gives you a raging headache in the morning. 

You were only going to have one, maybe two drinks, just like you usually do. 

But then Eddie found the fucking tequila. 

“Where’d you even get that?” you giggle. You'd be embarrassed by the sound if you were even a little bit sober. Thankfully, you’re halfway through your second can, and any sense of embarrassment is filled by the warm pool of alcohol in your stomach. 

“Maddie made margaritas the night I moved in,” Buck says, raising his beer bottle to his lips. 

The boys are both on their third beers, but between the lower alcohol content and their stronger tolerances, they aren’t as drunk as you are. Hopefully, the tequila will even the score. 

“Where did she buy it?” Eddie laughs as he inspects the bottle. 

It’s cheap: you can tell that much by looking at it. It’s a 1.75 liter plastic bottle — not exactly top shelf. You expected nothing less from Maddie, since she doesn’t strike you as a girl who sips high-end tequila. No, she’s more like the girl who makes way too strong margaritas and bullies her brother into taking shots in the kitchen. 

Buck shrugs. “Grocery store, probably.”

Eddie starts looking through the cabinets. “You got a blender?”

Buck snorts. “I have shot glasses.”

“I’m not doing shots,” you laugh. “Tequila shots and I have… a bad relationship.” 

Eddie gives you a look. “What type of relationship?” 

“Whatever type ends in me throwing up in someone’s sink.”

Buck tips his head back and cackles. “You did that?! You?!”

“I just graduated from the Academy and went out with some classmates to celebrate,” you explain, cheeks flushing as you smile. “It started with bar hopping and ended with tequila shots at someone’s house.”

“Sounds like it actually ended with you throwing up in someone’s sink,” Eddie points out. 

“And you’re trying to make it happen again!” You accuse as Eddie continues scouring the kitchen. “Shame on you, Diaz!”

“Hey, it would be nice to see the most professional member of the 118 get a little crazy,” Buck says. 

You snort again. “I’m the most professional member of the 118?”

“Professional isn’t the right word,” Eddie says, finally finding a cocktail shaker. 

“Formal?” Buck proposes, looking to the other man. 

Eddie hums in consideration as he fills the shaker with ice, leaving the tequila on the island. “Classy?”

Buck shakes his head. “No, that’s not it either.”

Eddie sets the shaker, now filled with ice, on the island. He then opens the fridge door and comes back with lime juice. “Proper?”

“Proper,” Buck agrees, leaning his hip on the island. His body is turned towards Eddie, watching him as he pours the ingredients into the shaker. 

“Proper,” you echo, your lips wrapping around the word as you say it. “How exactly am I proper?” 

“I don’t know,” Buck says after taking another sip. “Just… the way you carry yourself, I guess.”

“How specific.”

Buck flicks a beer cap, previously sitting on the island, at you. You try to catch it, but it slides off the table before you can catch it. You flip him off. 

“Not so proper anymore,” Eddie remarks. 

The tequila takes you by the hand and leads the three of you into Buck’s living room. You’re on your second margarita on the rocks, courtesy of Edmundo Diaz. The boys decide to take two shots each, back to back, and simply watching them kind of made you sick. 

“You are so full of shit!” you yell. 

You don’t know much at this moment, other than the fact that you’re completely and entirely drunk. Not wasted, not blackout. You’re in that sweet spot where you’re sober enough to know that you’re being obnoxious but too intoxicated to care. As someone who normally presents as ‘proper’ (apparently),  it’s a combination akin to fire and kerosene — absolutely ruthless. 

“I am not!” Buck laughs.

Buck claims he’s never had a lap dance, and you don’t believe him for a second. 

You’re not entirely sure how you got on this topic. It definitely didn’t start like this, that you’re almost entirely most likely probably sure of. It had something to do with the ‘old partners’ discussion. Or maybe the ‘craziest night out’ swapping of stories. It’s hard to tell — you’ve cycled through several topics tonight, and you’ll be lucky to remember half of them. 

“Eddie, do you believe him?”

Eddie chuckles as he raises his hands. “I’m staying out of this one.”

Like you or Buck would let that happen.

“What about you, hotshot?” Buck asks, cocking an eyebrow. “You ever had a lap dance?” 

Eddie’s eyes narrow slightly, almost like he’s sizing up Buck. It makes the alcohol in your belly burn a little warmer. 

“Once,” Eddie eventually answers. 

You turn your head to the side like a curious dog. “Oh?”

“Do tell,” Buck says, leaning forward. 

“It was at my shitty excuse of a bachelor party,” Eddie explains, taking a sip of his fourth beer. “One of my friends in Texas insisted. We went out to a strip club, he paid for it, and… that’s it.” 

“He paid for it,” you echo. “What a gentleman.” 

Sitting in the armchair, Eddie gently kicks your leg on the coffee table. You giggle, pulling both your legs back onto the couch. Buck, at the other end of the couch, puts his feet in your lap. 

“You’re being awfully quiet,” he observes. “Have you?”

You snort. “Have I ever had a lap dance?”

“Or given one.”

You press into the nailbed on one of Buck’s toes using your thumb. He yelps and pulls his legs back. 

“Half an hour ago, you were calling me ‘proper.’ Now, you’re asking if I’ve given someone a lap dance,” you recall. You turn to Eddie. “Can you believe him?”

“Absolutely not,” Eddie says as he shakes his head. “...Have you, though?”

Buck cackles as you kick Eddie’s leg. 

“I’ve never given anyone a lap dance,” you answer loudly. “I almost got one, though.” 

Both the boys raise their eyebrows.

“Do you remember that call we went on a few months back? To a male strip club?”

“Yeahhh,” Buck says. At some point, he replaced his beer bottle with the tequila bottle, which he’s now cradling like a baby. “What was that place called? Thirsty?”

“Just Thirst, I think,” Eddie remarks. “The one where a dancer rolled his ankle, right?”

You nod. “One of his buddies offered me a dance for being such a great first responder.”

Buck smiles and takes a swig of the tequila, wincing as it goes down. You nudge his knee, then pull your fingers towards yourself, gesturing for the bottle. Buck’s smile looks a little more cocky, but he hands the bottle over anyways. 

“You didn’t accept, huh?”

You sip a  little more of the tequila than you should. You can’t help it — it goes down so easily, leaving nothing but fuzzy warmth in its wake. You’ll regret it tomorrow, but for now, you’re basking in it. “Not really my thing.”

“Not even for the story?” Eddie asks. 

“You don’t get to be the ‘proper’ one by doing something ‘for the story,’” you counter. 

Eddie makes a face of contemplation as he reaches for the bottle. “Fair.” 

“You are really hung up on that word,” Buck notes. 

“It was… surprising, that’s all,” you chuckle. 

Buck makes a humming noise, rubbing his lips in thought. “I could do it.”

You and Eddie share a look. Eddie is the first to test the waters. “Do what?” 

“Give someone a lap dance.” 

You can feel your face get hot. You swallow the lump that suddenly took residence in your throat. 

Meanwhile, Eddie laughs. “You’ve never gotten a lap dance, but you think you can give one?” 

Buck shrugs, leaning one elbow on his knee. “Why not? I’ve seen Magic Mike.” 

“You’ve seen Magic Mike but never gotten a lap dance,” Eddie continues after taking a swig of liquor. “That makes sense.” 

You reach for the bottle, which Eddie grants you. You take a long drink, gulping a few times. Pulling the bottle back, you use your thumb to wipe your bottom lip. “Do your worst, Buckley.”

He turns his head to stare at you. He huffs out a laugh, looking at you the whole time. ��What?” 

“Let’s see what you’ve got,” you continue, leaning back in the couch. You prop one arm on the back and the other on the armrest, the tequila bottle hitting the end table in the process. “You’ve never given a lap dance, I’ve never gotten one. We’ll pop each other’s cherries.” 

You’d never say any of this sober. Shit, you’d never say any of this two drinks in. You’re in so much deeper than that now; between the margs and the sips, you’ve had at least 6 shots. You can practically feel the alcohol in your blood. It’s hot, thick, and wanting. 

You're 100% throwing up in Buck's sink tomorrow.

You blink, and Buck is on top of you. His hands press into the back of the couch, holding his weight so he can be face-to-face with you. If the booze in your veins is hot, then his breath on your lips is fucking scalding. 

He lifts his hips and brings them back down in a rippling motion: he’s grinding on you. You giggle, high-pitched and shameless. You move your hands to cover your mouth. You can’t wrap your head around the idea that this is actually happening. 

Buck sits up straighter in your lap. He’s careful to keep his weight on his knees, which are on either side of your legs. He puffs his chest before rolling his shoulders forward and his ass backwards on your thighs in a fluid motion. You can feel the friction of his pants on your bare legs. You thank your past self for choosing to wear shorts. 

He gently takes your wrists, moving your hands from your mouth to his chest. He’s fully clothed, so you’re dragging your hands down his sweater. Still, you can feel the rippling of his muscles under his shirt. You throw your head back in laughter at the sheer ridiculousness of it, but you know the burning in your stomach is no longer entirely thanks to the liquor. 

“Not bad,” Eddie critiques from his seat. 

You laugh harder. 

“What, you can do better?” Buck challenges. 

Eddie narrows his eyes again before smirking. He pushes himself out of the chair, shooing Buck away with his hand. 

Buck raises his hands in surrender, turning on one knee before flopping on the couch beside you. 

“This isn’t happening,” you laugh, shaking your head like you’re trying to wake yourself up from a dream. 

You’ve had a crush on both of them since the first time you saw them. How could you not? They are completely and utterly gorgeous men. When you realized how funny and caring they both are, it just sealed the deal. You never, in your wildest imagination, pictured yourself in a situation like this with either of them, let alone both of them. 

Not that you’re complaining, of course.

Eddie takes Buck’s place, only he’s towering over you since he’s standing instead of sitting. He puts his hands on your sides, trailing down to your thighs. You shudder under his touch, hoping it isn’t noticeable. The way the corner of his mouth turns up tells you that it’s definitely noticeable. 

Eddie’s hands reach your knees, which he loops his fingers under. In a swift motion, he pulls your legs up and presses his body against yours. You yelp in surprise and wrap your legs around his back, somehow pulling him closer. 

His hands move to your back, and he picks you up. You yelp again, astonished by the ease he can lift you. You shouldn’t be so shocked, considering his career. When his grasp moves from your back to your ass, though, he’s no longer Firefighter Diaz; he’s Eddie, the man you have a crush on. And the man who’s currently holding your ass. 

Eddie turns on his heel and carefully lays you on Buck’s coffee table, which makes you cackle again. Your laughter dies in your throat when Eddie places himself over you again. Your chests are touching, as are your noses. 

You look into Eddie’s eyes, and it’s as if you can suddenly read his mind. “Dancers aren’t supposed to kiss the clientele.”

Eddie smiles again. It’s the kind where only one corner of his mouth curls up, and his lips shift to the side. “Good thing I’m not a dancer.”

His lips meet yours, and it’s nothing but heat. He tastes like a mix of cheap beer and tequila, and if you weren’t already, you could get drunk off of it. Your tongues meet and separate like lovers on a dance floor. When you’re out of breath, you wonder if you could suck the air out of his lungs, just to keep you connected to him for a little longer. 

Eddie pulls away first, his chest heaving desperately for air. 

“You lose,” Buck remarks. 

“How did I lose?”

“It was a competition?” you interject. 

“It’s called a lap dance,” Buck points out. “That wasn’t in her lap.” 

Eddie rolls his eyes fondly. They eventually settle on your mouth. “Eh, I think I won.” 

[theoldgodsaredisappointed]

Idk y'all like at this point it just feels like there's nowhere to go for long time mtg fans who are more interested in the game's original settings and stories.

Half of all sets in a release block going forward are UB, and now UB is legal across all formats? Grand, sprawling stories like the Phyrexian invasion are given a set (and a shitty half If they're lucky) to resolve, when they would've been given a whole release block to themselves in the past.

Nothing against those who enjoy UB, I'm not gonna stand here and pretend I didn't buy the fallout edh decks. If you like an IP and it comes to magic it's exciting! If it brings in new players that's great! But at a certain point what's the true priority here?

Old players generally aren't interested in most or every UB set. Players drawn in by their fave IP being in magic are a lot less likely to invest in the next sets. More casual players often can't afford the premium usually placed on UB sets. Wizards has to pay out God knows how much in licensing fees to monster companies with more money than them like marvel. Clearly this isn't sustainable.

But at this point it truly and genuinely feels like magic is not interested in telling it's own stories in its own unique settings. It doesn't care about giving it's writers the time to actually Write. It's more concerned with original settings staying "on theme" then actually feeling like fleshed out worlds with deep and complex lore.

I'll be shocked if magic Doesn't become nothing more then an IP blender game within the next 5 years. And if it does become that then it'll be an even quicker limp into the coffin.

Draft is dead. The future of EDH is uncertain at best. Standard is basically just for competitive players and tourney grinders hoping to make money. UB is going to dilute any remnants of originality and writing magic could be bothered with.

But hey the hasbro stock holders are happy right? Number go up? Number go up good? Damn it all for short term profits. Who cares what happens in the long run.

(I want to clarify that I do not bash the writing and lore of magic to bash the People writing it. Rather the Company that does not properly support them and give them the room to nurture their stories. I don't even necessarily want to heap all the blame on wizards. I have no idea how much hasbro forces their hand. What a slap in the face to see magic have some of its most successful sales ever with lotr and bloomburrow and Still face massive layoffs. This. Isn't. Sustainable.)

These are my opinions I'm venting

[charliegyrth]

A Milkshake a Day - Part 1 of 4

Gary and I Make an Oscar Bet

As the Oscars played, I munched on kettle corn. I knew I shouldn’t. I’d gained 32 pounds since last summer and I’d already had to change my pants size twice. My shirts had upgraded from mediums to XLs. Worst of all, my jawline had softened to the point where I genuinely looked like a different person.

I was never vain about my looks, but I couldn’t help but feel self-conscious sitting next to my roommate Gary. (Even at my thinnest, I felt self-conscious next to him.)

We sat together on the couch, watching the show. He didn’t snack, of course. He never did. He was wearing his skin-tight Barbenheimer shirt. His pecs were so large that they absolutely warped Barbie’s smiling face.

“It’s coming up,” he said excitedly. “Get ready to admit defeat.”

Every year, Gary and I made bets on what would win best picture. This year, I was all-in on Oppenheimer. (And based on all the awards so far, it looked like I’d made the right choice.) Gary went for Barbie. Despite being a gym-obsessed muscle hunk, he was a bit girlish in his taste in movies. I found that very cute.

We sat through the final commercial break, both a bit nervous about the last award of the night. Our previous bets had always been pretty low-stakes. The loser would have to pay the winner twenty bucks. Or take him out to dinner. Or sing an embarrassing song at karaoke.

This year was different. Whoever won the bet had to wash the dishes every day for a year. We both hated doing the dishes (mostly because the blender that Gary used for his protein shakes was an absolute bitch to clean out).

“I dunno, man. I feel pretty confident right now.”

He stared at the TV, trying to hide his nervousness. “Barbie’s a freakin’ masterpiece. How could it be anything else?”

The award was announced (Oppenheimer, of course), and Gary jumped off the couch. He knocked the bowl out of my hands and popcorn scattered onto the floor. (Thankfully, it wasn’t a lot. I’d already eaten almost of all it.) “No!” he screamed.

“Sorry, Gare. Looks like you’ll be spending a lot more time in the kitchen this year.” I felt the thrill of victory, but I also felt a bit sorry for him. Not only did his favorite movie of the year lose out on all the important categories (minus Billie Eilish’s iconic song win, of course), but the thought of all that dish-washing had left him looking genuinely panicked.

He sat back down, grabbing me by my shirt. He pulled, exposing a sliver of my new belly. “Please, man. If I’da known Barbie had any chance of losing, I never would’ve agreed to this stupid bet.”

“A deal’s a deal, man,” I said, handing him the empty popcorn bowl. “Here. You can start with this.”

“Isn’t there another chore I could do? I could… I could take out the trash!”

“Too easy.”

“What about dusting? I could dust every room once a week.”

“Sorry.”

“Please, Bry! Anything but dishes. Just name it. I’m sure there’s something else you want.”

I looked down at my exposed belly. The only thing I really wanted was to lose weight, but I just didn’t have the self-control. My biggest issue was the McDonalds right down the street. I walked by it every day on my way home from work, and I had zero self-control. It was those damn milkshakes. Since that restaurant opened, I’d been bringing one home every single afternoon. I tried to stop, but I think I was addicted.

He couldn’t help with that. I’d sort of resigned myself to the fact that I was destined to keep getting fatter and fatter.

(He’d tried to take me to his gym a couple times, and I hated every minute of it. No will power. Plus, I felt so awkward being the tagalong fat friend surrounded by all his ultra-hot gym buddies.)

Then I had an idea. A ridiculous, weird idea. “How about, instead of doing the dishes, you drink my McDonalds milkshakes for me?”

“What?”

“Hear me out. You know I have this compulsion. Every time I walk by McDonalds, I have to buy a milkshake. I can’t stop myself. How about… I bring them home and you drink them instead of me? It obviously won’t affect you, since you basically live at the gym. It’ll be like I’m vicariously drinking them, but I won’t get all the extra calories.”

“That’s… weird.”

“I know, but it’s better than doing the dishes, right?”

“True.” He was really considering it. He looked down at my belly, which was once again covered by my shirt. I knew he was worried about how quickly I was gaining weight. I also knew that he didn’t quite understand my logic, but that’s okay. I didn’t really understand it either. “You got a deal.”

We shook on it.

For the first time, I felt optimistic for the future. I think I found the motivation that I needed.

***

The next day, I got home with the usual milkshake in my hand. It took a lot of effort not to drink anything on my walk down the street.

Gary was waiting for me in the living room. He was shirtless, still sweaty from his trip to the gym. He was pretty much the most handsome guy I knew, but we’d lived together so long (both cycling through different boyfriends) that I only saw him platonically. I appreciated his pecs and abs without lusting after them.

I handed him the shake. “You ready?”

“You know how weird this is, right?”

“I do.”

We sat on the couch. He held the cup nervously, like he was handling radioactive material or something. I don’t think he’d ever had a McDonalds milkshake in his entire life.

He sucked on the straw. “Ugh. It’s too sweet.”

“Try to enjoy it, please,” I said. If this was going to work, I needed to watch him drink it down and trick my brain into thinking that I was the one drinking.

He sucked some more. I could tell he didn’t like it, but he did his best to hide the look of disgust on his face. He drank it pretty fast, though, both despite and because of his disgust at the taste. He stopped about halfway through.

“You sure you don’t want to have the rest?”

I did. More than anything. My mouth was literally watering. “A deal’s a deal, right?”

He grumbled and kept drinking. Soon, his straw started making slurp noises. He’d finished the whole thing. He leaned back against the couch, holding his still-flat stomach. He did not look happy.

“You’ll get used to the taste,” I said.

“I better.”

Read Part 2 here. You can find the full ebook here. And you can find all my stories here.