#BENING SOAP

[joinmeintheweeds]

In terms of colonization and the enmeshment of religion and politics, Dune is a feast for the mind. In terms of gender and it's hand in all of the above, Dune is a a pack of saltines with only a rare grain of salt to entertain your taste buds.

[courseyoulovemeyoudontknowme]

Mother and Child (2009, Rodrigo García)

06/11/2023

Mother and Child is a 2009 film written and directed by Rodrigo García. Alejandro González Iñárritu, Alfonso Cuarón and Guillermo del Toro join García to capture with great skill the powerful bond that exists between a mother and her child.

The film premiered on September 14, 2009 at the Toronto International Film Festival.

Faced with her mother's insistence, Karen (Annette Benin) gave up the daughter she had at 14 for adoption. Elizabeth (Naomi Watts) is that little girl who now has to face her own issues about family, sexuality and power.

[s0apmactav1sh]

Its been a hot minute friends. I am currently going through a shitty ass time but here have me waffling about my fic im trying to write.

(This isnt an update, i just need to qrite something before i disappear for a bit over shit thats happening)

Crawler, the nickname given to you by the 141 after they got used to you casually crawling around the ceiling so it just came naturally to them to start teasing you with the nickname whenever the found you having a fit and giving out about the recruits while sitting upside down on the roof.

"Ya alright there crawler?" With how usually it was to find you in the prediment you were in right now it was no secret you didnt like the recruits you dealt with on the daily "No! How do they even survive on missions. My gods-" Cue Gaz listening for an entire hour as you ramble on about every mistake made by each individule recruit, names given and all. Once you stop your out of breathe and glaring at gaz because of the stupid grin hes been giving you. "What are you smiling at?" "You."

Spiderman kisses. No matter what no matter where. Could be in a random hallway, an office the debriefing room or any of there rooms at this point with how much time you spend with them. Soaps always the one looking for them no matter if you agrue that your nothing like a spider and he is being silly. But still you give in to the puppy eyes the werewolf man gives you. Your quite the sucker for them.

"No way am I hanging upside down because you want a kiss!" The way soaps ears droop and his tail lessens in wagging has you feeling guilty but what truly sticks it to you is the puppy dog eyes he now has to try convince you. Lips so prettily pouted and everything and who are you to deny that face. Even if you huff and groan as you geting yourself situated and crouched on the ceiling. So he can kiss you like in the spiderman movies. And as soon as its over Soaps rushing off to gaz to bloat over what you did.

Ghost somehow being the one to discover the ear bursting screech you let out when anyones hand even remotely brushes off your tail. He didnt even mean to purposely do it and the wraith was so thankful he was already dead bc the screech you had let out when his fingers lightly touched off the tip was enough to have him wincing and covering his ears to protect them.

It was a pure accident. He didnt even realise he had come in contact with your tail until you let out a horrifyingly loud screech that had him covering his ears. "Jesus. What on gods green earth was that. Are you some sort of banshee aswell." Before he can even get an answer out of you, your gone having bolted for the door as soon as that sound left your lips. What an awkward interaction that leaves you both walking on eggshells around each other.

Price deciding with all the time youve been around and the fact that his boys seem to trust you he adds you to his horde. But in a way that you dont realise that you apart of it. It starts off with him patting your back after missions amd saying goodjob, even if you were just look out. Then it moves on to him giving you random things, youve been eyeing up a new pair of gloves? Hes bought them and left them outside your door the next morning before you woke up. Its not until he leaves one of his scales on top of your desk that your realise what was happen but still you kinda oblivious so you just pocket the scale and run your fingers over it for good luck before every mission.

Ever since the others had become more comfortable and accepting with you on the team Price had bene thinking of making you a part of his horde. You'd be just like his boys, the centerpiece the thing he cared about the most. So whenever he saw your dule eyes light up at the sight of new gloves or a weapon he knew the way of winning you over was sneakily gifting you little presents. Without your gruad up so much it was easier to tell that you were a bit oblivious. Certain signs and things not processing in your mind. So when he leaves the scale down hes not sure if youll even see it but sure enough he manages to walk past your room, stopping when he see you slip the scale into the pocket of your gear before walking away with a goofy smile on his face. You may not know that your now his, but hey you will soon enough when the rest of the boys give you something of significance to them.

-

Silly rambles. Ok ima go take my meds and cry myself to sleep I might bring back king!price at like 4 am tonight.

[captain-mj]

Vampire AU Pt 2

Answered some questions I got but no SoapGhost biting just yet

Interviewer: Why do you not like when Gaz feeds on Soap?

Ghost: It makes him smell… bland. It’s also rude. No one in the house feeds off Soap. Only I can but even there, I don’t. 

The Interviewer checked this information and it turns out to strangely enough be true. No one had ever itten Soap. 

Interviewer: So how do you feel about Soap?

Ghost: He’s my familiar.

Interviewer: And what does that mean to you?

Ghost: He does all of the chores around the house that I don’t want to do and gets me food. 

Interviewer pauses, clearly thinking he’ll continue. He doesn’t.

Interviewer: Do you like him?

Ghost: Like him? No. Absolutely not. He’s just a human. I don’t like… stay awake thinking about him. 

Ghost was once again staying awake thinking about Soap. He stared at the top of his coffin and just… thought of him. 

Soap smelled good. Most of the time. He was only human and he did deal with dead bodies occasionally, so Ghost gave him grace about that. But most of the time, he smelled… delicious. Ghost had a feeling if he tasted him, he’d be savory. Not sweet, Ghost didn’t really like the sweeter bloods like Alejandro did. He’d probably taste buttery too. Warm and so human under his hands. His heartbeat was so loud at times. Always even, never afraid of Ghost even when he should be. Sometimes Ghost would pick him up to get him out of the way of things and Soap would just smile. Ghost occasionally picked him up just so he could hear his heartbeat. It was a melody that he wanted to get lost in. 

This morning, it was clear he wouldn’t be sleeping, so he listened to everyone moving below. Gaz went upstairs to the attic where his bedroom was. 

Soap moved down below a little longer, most likely cleaning. He liked to get it all done before heading to bed so when Ghost woke up, he didn’t have to deal with it. 

The house started quieting down and he slowly stepped out of his coffin. Luckily his curtains had been pulled tight so it was safe for him to escape. He stretched and peaked out of his door. 

Soap had blew out all of the candles and pulled all the curtains so Ghost walked around in the darkness. He crept downstairs to Soap’s room. It was the smallest room in the house, but it was still pretty nice. Soap had bought his own bed and had decorated it himself. Ghost saw books littering the desk and looked at them for a moment. Soap usually put them away, but he must’ve been tired. Price had bene asking him for things all night so it probably wore him out. He’d tell Price to leave him alone a bit more. While Soap acted as the house familiar, he was really Ghost’s familiar and Ghost didn’t want him to be worn out or neglect himself. 

Maybe he also selfishly wanted more of Soap’s attention on him. He wasn’t used to sharing him and watching him pay more attention to the others… 

Something feral and angry pressed against his fangs and Soap would be defenseless right now. He looked gorgeous, strewn among the pillows and blankets on his bed. Ghost didn’t feel bad staring since Soap had a shirt and boxers on. The house had started to get cold but in the summer, Soap sometimes didn’t wear anything. Ghost had learned quickly to knock in the summer if Soap had accidentally slept in. 

But right now, he looked peaceful and luckily modest. 

Soap turned over and Ghost silently stepped back, watching him stretch and get comfier. If he bit him, how would he do it? Would he sink his teeth in and rip a piece out of him? Or would he be gentle? 

Would Soap let him? Not to turn him. A selfish part never, ever wanted to turn him. But if it was just to taste him, would Soap let him? The idea of the two of them tangled together as he took from him. Ghost’s fangs hurt. They ached so bad. 

“So do you do this often?” Price spoke very softly and Ghost almost jumped out of his skin. 

“You were always the only one that could sneak up on me.” Ghost sighed. “Just when I can’t sleep.”

Price nodded and stood next to him. It made Ghost feel weird. It was one thing for Ghost to watch his familiar, but as much as Price was his sire, he didn’t want to let him watch Soap as well. “Let’s get out of here, John.”

“I think he left someone in the basement if you’re hungry.” Price smiled at him. He looked alive in a way Ghost refused to believe he possibly could. Even back then, Price must’ve been at least 200 years old when they met. Simon had been dazzled by him. A healthy amount of respect, appreciation and probably attraction meant he didn’t notice what everyone else did. 

The night he laid on that battlefield, body broken far beyond repair and ready to accept death, Price had told him he couldn’t let him die yet. It was a horrible transformation made much worse by the existing injuries. He had felt so pathetic, having Price care for him for so long. The memories were still quite a sore spot for him. 

Ghost nodded and followed him to the basement. There was in fact a person down there that was only half drained. Price didn’t eat very much as he mostly just caught glances at Ghost. 

“Why do you wear the mask?” 

Ghost groaned immediately and sank down to the floor. “Because I want to.”

“You’re such a handsome man though! You don’t need to cover up!”

“It’s not about that though.” Ghost sighed.

“What is it about then? Those days are so long behind us. No need to hide your identity. You could be anyone now!” Price grinned. “You could just be Si-”

Ghost got up and walked away from him, shoulders tensing. He walked straight up the stairs and through the living room and he could hear Price’s anxiety like it was a force.

“Simon! It’s still fucking daylight!” Price snapped so loud it vibrated the walls. 

Soap was up in moments and rushing over, clearly still sleep deprived, but more worried about Ghost than getting to sleep. “Sir, are you okay? Did something happen? Did I miss a curtain?” He looked up at Ghost who paused. 

Fuck. 

Ghost stared at him for a moment and watched as Soap’s eyes went down to his mouth and he became painfully aware of the fact that his mouth was uncovered. Soap’s eyes widened and his heartbeat sped up. 

Ghost wanted to look in a mirror to know what he looked like, but there was never a reflection. He imagined the scars. Deep lines across his mouth in a harsh mock smile. Big fangs. One of his previous lovers had described him once. They said his lips always looked bloodstained, even if they didn’t have blood on them.

Did he still have blood on his face now? He hadn’t exactly cleaned his face off. Soap was scared. Surely he knew Ghost would never hurt him. 

Interviewer: Man, he looked pretty scary with the blood. He also is the first one I’ve seen that’s actually that pale. 

Soap: He’s so hot. I was so nervous he’d read my mind

Interviewer: Can they do that?

Soap: No, but like… you never know

Interviewer: What were you thinking?

Soap blushed: Very uncatholic thoughts thats for sure. 

Ghost schooled his expression and reached up, pulling down his mask. “No. You did a fine job, Johnny. Are you okay? We didn’t mean to wake you.” 

Soap’s heart sped up instead of slowing down like Ghost wanted. He also flushed a little. “Thank you, sir. I’m fine. Was worried I’d come up and you’d be… anyway. Do you want me to help you back in your coffin?”

Ghost looked behind him and Price was gone. “Yeah. I’d like that.”

Soap walked with him, the two falling into the same pattern they always did. When they first met, Ghost had walked faster and Soap had always jogged to keep up with him. Although it was funny, Ghost had slowed down. Rodolfo had noticed and teased him about it. Just a little. 

Ghost would never ever tell Soap. Ever. But he wasn’t in the best of places when he came along. Alejandro had pointed out when he stopped sleeping for nights on end. Ghost liked to believe it was just having to make sure they didn’t eat Soap, but he knew that wasn’t really true. He just liked… hanging out with the human. 

Soap offered his hand and Ghost used it to get back in his coffin. 

“If you wake up again, just get my attention okay?”

“I don’t need your permission.” Ghost grumbled.

Soap only smiled. “Course not. But I get nervous. I make one mistake and… I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you on my watch, sir.” 

Ghost stared up at him. He saw a glimpse of blond hair and green eyes that did not match Soap’s brown and blue. 

“Alright, Johnny.” Ghost reached up and Soap paused, watching him. He gently traced the scar over Soap’s eye, gloved fingers just barely, barely brushing it. “Have I ever asked where that came from?”

“No, sir.”

“Tell me when I wake up?”

“Of course, Ghost.” Soap smiled at him and Ghost must’ve been much more tired than he thought, because he thought of what his lips would feel like against his. 

Would his fangs cut him?

Soap watched Ghost’s eyes close and how he stopped breathing. It was something that had freaked him out at first. When they slept, whatever made them breathe just stopped. They were also effectively dead to the world, almost nothing woke them up. 

Soap closed the coffin and went back to his room. He put all of the books on his desk away and then went back to bed. 

Soap woke up the next day and saw a giant dog in the living room. He stared at him for a few minutes before deciding that was fine and also not his business. The wolf looked at him for a few minutes before putting his head back on his paws. 

Soap thought he looked kinda weird too, but again, not his business. He walked right past it and went to Ghost, fully intending to tell him about his scar and ask him what he wanted to do today. But as soon as Ghost’s eyes open, he looked angry. 

Alejandro started yelling before he got a chance to really ask him about it. “SOAP WHY IS THERE A MUTT IN MY HOUSE???”

Soap swung around and frowned. “What?”

Ghost was up and at ‘em immediately. “Ale, calm down. We’ll just kick him out.”

“THERE’S A FUCKING WEREWOLF AND YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN!” 

Soap winced. “Werewolf?” 

Ghost rolled his eyes and went downstairs to see Gaz between Alejandro and the wolf. “Kyle, get your pet out of here.”

Soap frowned. “He is still a person?? No need to be so mean?”

“I don’t care! I hope it hurts his feelings!” Ghost scoffed and crossed his arms. 

Rodolfo sighed. “Can you make him take a bath at least? He reeks.” 

Soap sniffed the air, only catching the faintest scent of cologne. 

Gaz hummed. “I like the smell.”

“You’re disgusting.” Rodolfo wrinkled his nose. “It smells like dog!”

Soap looked at the… werewolf. It was weird. He stared at him for a second before seeing it… change. 

Soap pulled away to throw up as its body bent and twisted. That was the most disgusting thing he had ever seen. 

“Sorry about that. I know its kinda gross the first time ya see it.” 

“HE’S AMERICAN??” Price sounded scandalized. 

“My name is Alex.” Alex was naked. Completely. Not a hint of shame about this either. Soap averted his eyes but noticed that Rodolfo and Ghost both looked him over. Alejandro waited until Alex glanced at Gaz to look him up and down, but he certainly did. 

“Get him out.” 

Gaz shook his head. “If you guys can be super gross with each other, I can have my werewolf boyfriend.”

Alejandro gasped. “Our love is not comparable to you coupling with that… that…”

Alex growled. “Don’t say it.”

“That dog!”

“That is so bigoted! I don’t call you guys bats.”

Alejandro growled and they started snapping at each other.

Price frowned at Gaz. “Why don’t you settle down with a nice older vampire? You can pick a rich one.”

Soap gasped and looked at Ghost who sighed. “He’s not… He’s not flirting.”

Gaz grimaced. “Price…”

Price smiled at him. “Don’t you think you need someone who understand you? He’s a werewolf. Also he’ll die in 80 years.”

Gaz nodded. “It’ll be a glorious 80 years and then I’ll find him again when he reincarnates.”

Price frowned. “But he’ll be a baby!” 

“I’ll obviously wait until he’s in his 20s!”

Soap hummed. “Oh, grooming.” 

Gaz gasped. “No! Not grooming! Because I won’t be talking to him!”

“You’re still going to wait until he’s legal. Groomer behavior.”

“You say as if there’s not over 700 years between you and Ghost.”

Ghost tilted his head. “What? We’re not dating.”

Gaz: They act like that and they’re not even fucking.

Interviewer: I’m so glad someone else sees it

Gaz: That’s a little pathetic honestly. Like… seriously? They even smooch?

Interviewer: Not that I’m aware of

Gaz: Wow. Wow. No wonder Ghost is always so unhappy. He hasn’t gotten laid since….

Interviewer: Since?

Gaz glances around: Too many ears. Can’t say. But yeah, I don’t think he’s done anything since then. 

Interviewer: And how long was that?

Gaz: 40 years ago? I mean. Unless he’s slept with Alejandro or Rodolfo and I just didn’t know

Interviewer: Why wouldn’t they tell you?

Gaz: Because I’d want to join. Obviously. 

Gaz smiled at Price. “Look, he treats me well, okay? I like him.” He looks at Alex who was now growling at Alejandro who was aggressively hissing back. “He’s so dreamy.”

Interviewer: What the fuck. 

Alex huffed but decided to leave. Apparently it was a pack meeting or something. He kissed Gaz goodbye and he left. 

Soap was relieved, just so his vampires would stop freaking out. 

Price was sitting at the back porch, which was a bit odd, but Soap decided it wasn’t his business. 

Ghost however went to check on him. He thought he had freaked him out earlier. Yeah, walking around during the daylight wasn’t his smartest move thinking back on it. 

But Price didn’t look upset. He looked… enthralled. 

Ghost frowned and followed his gaze to where their next door neighbor was. Their neighbor was… a person. Ghost hadn’t really talked to him. According to Soap, he was pretty nice. He happened to have a nocturnal schedule as well. 

“You good?”

“He’s gorgeous.”

“We don’t eat the neighbors. Brings too much suspicion.” The neighbor was human and Price usually wanted to eat those. As did all of them really. Earlier hadn’t Ghost thought of devouring Soap? 

“He reminds me of my third wife.” 

Ghost blinked slowly and tried to shuffle through Price’s wives. Not all of them were women. Some were male wives and some were female wives. The third one…

“Oh my god. He does look like your wife.” 

Taglist anyone?

[lya-dustin]

Broken

Or Feyd Rautha is more than Nurbanu believed

Cw: mentions of child sexual abuse, grooming, trauma, murder

The idea of Feyd having some aversion to touch is not mine unfortunately i have no idea who i read it from, if you know who they are feel free to tell me

6/23/24: the post is this one by @thealexandriaarchives thanks @ak-47-666 for finding it🖤🖤

@dunefandomhub

Feyd has an aversion to physical touch.

Nurbanu is careful to let him initiate any physical affection for his sake. Their first night she had made sure to ask ---even out loud at times--- if it was alright to reciprocate his attentions. He had guided her in the ways he liked being touched and didn’t stiffen when she reached out for his hand while they slept.

Even she was surprised to know there is more to him that meets the eye ---even the trained eye of a Bene Gessrit. Beneath the hard shell was the soft mushy inside of a child who was torn from his family and molded into the monster the Baron wanted.

He was groomed to be more than his heir. Rabban as well, but Rabban had been the one to kill their father and hand little Feyd Rautha over to Vladimir Harkonnen to replace him in his bed.

There was a strange sense of understanding between them in this shared pain they hid.

Feyd needed to kill the Baron and his brother for what he did, and still does, to him and Nurbanu needed her father dead for what he allowed to happen to her when she was younger and her mother's and brother's death.

A part of them will always remain dead if their tormentors are allowed to live.

“As your wife, I could forbid even your slaves from touching you.” Nurbanu helps him wash the feeling of disgust and shame that came with the nightmares of his uncle forcing himself on him.

“No one would dare speak against the Na-baroness, your word would be as powerful as mine.” There’s a slight turn in his lips as he considers this small benefit. No one would care what goes on between him and his wife, no one would have to know why they do this.

The princess is careful with her hands, using her gift to make her hands as light as possible while soaping him up. It is a state of vulnerability one doesn’t find in sex; he is sitting on a stool as she washed away the phantom feeling of the Baron on him.

There is a tub here, one she’d love to use, but knows green fields of flowers would have to sprout up in Geidi Prime before Feyd Rautha steps into it of his own accord. As much as he pretended to find enjoyment in the depravity he had been raised in, it was the source of nightmares no one could understand.

“I could kill them for you.” A part of them would remain broken if they ---her father, his uncle and brother--- were allowed to live any longer. She could love him one day; they were not so different. Broken people forced to play the villain in other people’s stories.

But they would triumph, they would avenge themselves and the universe would tremble at their feet.

“You may be Bene Gessrit, but you are no warrior, wife.” He barks a laugh at the idea of her doing the killing, turns to look at her thinking she is joking and yet he knows not to underestimate his bride-to-be.

“Let me surprise you then, husband, let me kill those bastards for you without even lifting a finger.” Nurbanu leans down until the effect of her proximity and her words make darling Feyd Rautha agree to it either way.

“Surprise me, then.”

On their first breakfast in Arrakis, Nurbanu Corrino, the newly minted Na-Baroness of Geidi Prime uses the Voice to make Vladimir Harkonnen and Glossu Rabban fight each other to the death as part of their morning entertainment.

Feyd enjoys his wedding gift so much that he let's her cradle him as they recline on the large pillows watching the spectacle before them.

[omarfor-orchestra]

Qual è il problema di "un professore" su netflix? (Nessuna polemica eh, chiedo sinceramente perché non sono aggiornata sulla situazione del mondo serie tv in Italia, ma è interessante come argomento)

Prima di tutto è strano perché fino a qualche mese fa era di prime video, però sti magheggi di marketing non li capisco molto bene quindi vabbè

Netflix ha una strategia per quanto riguarda i format che è funzionale per Netflix ma non per le fiction che vanno in televisione (episodi veloci, fatti per essere guardati tutti in una botta, superficialità, altre cose che sono troppo fusa per sottolineare) e tende a spremere le serie fino a rovinarle, per poi magari cancellarle per motivi che di solito hanno a che fare con i soldi. Vedi cosa è successo con MareFuori, che scommetto ciò che vuoi che è stata rovinata per gli interventi di Netflix sulla scrittura ed è diventata una soap.

UnProfessore non è una serie fatta per stare lì, è una serie di Rai1 molto molto democristiana fatta per essere vista dai giovani così come dalle sessanta/settantenni pensionate innamorate di AleGassmann, ha un format completamente diverso dalle classiche serie teen che vanno su Netflix e il rischio è di trasformare completamente il prodotto fino a renderlo irriconoscibile, così come è successo con MF. Non sto dicendo che il prodotto originale sia perfetto, assolutamente no, però era fine a se stesso e ottimo nella sua bruttezza che alla fine ha ripagato in ogni caso, perché cambiarlo?

Mi auguro sia solo un accordo di distribuzione, ma purtroppo non sono così fiduciosa

[titleleaf]

more on BG Sister Matilda and the Dune Encyclopedia

The Dune Encyclopedia is put together like a collection of different in-universe articles and commentaries, and the result is really interesting if sometimes very frustrating. This kind of meta storytelling approach allowed the contributors to address some of the inadvertent inconsistencies and unexplored elements of the novels' worldbuilding but also to get a little silly with it. The entry on the mandatory SFF fuck-planet Gamont is so freaking weird that I have to share it with my fellow Duneposters -- we're given a passage from the diary of a humble Bene Gesserit laundress as she records the curious customs and peculiar folk songs she encounters there and we get the flavor of the place through her stubbornly innocent POV. This interlude was written by J.R.M. aka Julia Reed; the text that follows is Reed's, while all transcription errors are mine.

[content note: the cultural insensitivity in this is a little different than usual for Dune -- some of the themed areas on Gamont relate to Orientalist and racist fantasies around sexual enslavement drawn from our own Earth history, handled with all the flippancy of a horny Disney theme park. Also the canonicity of this is... dubious.]

****

Sabhaasdii, nAudrim 28:

Cold and windy again today, but the laundry-room is always warm. Lots of sisters complain about Wallach's weather, but not me. My job is a blessing.

Shannisdii, nAudrim 29:

Entertainment tonight. A very special dinner in honor of His Grace, Duke Philippos from Gallatin and his wife — a great lady, you could tell. After supper in the Great Hall, his musicians played and our choir sang. And that was very nice, but then I almost died! His Grace introduced his mentat — a fine-looking man, but tunic not well pressed — and asked him to very kindly favor us with a demonstration. Well, the mentat looked right at me and asked me what I did, so I told him I was the head laundress. Then he wrote something down on a piece of paper, and asked me to ask him any question that I wanted. Well, I don't know why, but the first thing popped into my head, and I said, "How many stars are in the Lyre Nebula?" Then he passed the note to Reverend Mother and asked her to read it out, and she did — it said "The number of stars in the Lyre Nebula is" — and then some big number. Well, that didn't go over too well. I mean, there was some polite applause, but mentats, after all!

Jehansdii, nAudrim 30:

I think I figured it out, what the mentat did. When I went to work this morning, I picked up the soap box and right on the back there's this big ad for a contest "Name the Stars". And it said, how many stars in the Lyre Nebula, and if you fill it out, you win a prize if you're right. And then I remembered that the mentat asked me what I did first, before anything, I still have his paper for a souvenir. I ought to send it in. Serve him right.

Phyllisdii, neSheustim 15:

I won!!! I can't believe it!!! The mentat was right and I won a Two-Week, All- Expense Paid Trip to Gamont, Planet of Pleasure, wherever that is.

Mothersdii. neSheustim 16:

Well I went to 'see Mother Caius today and it was very strange — very strange indeed. Said no. Said Sister Matilda, the trip would be too strenuous for a woman of your years. My years! I said I'm only fifty-seven add I've been doing laundry for forty years, and the the last eight and you can't be all that weak if you can do that. Then I told her just how much wash there was to be toted around. I promised to take Sister Bertha with me, so Mother said we could keep an eye on one another. Then she said something about innocence being the best protection and sent me off.

Glensdii, neSheustim 25:

I've been so busy I've really neglected my diary. A lot to catch up on. First, I'm writing this from Gamont, which is a very odd place. When we got off the ship, there was a wire fence between us and a line marked "Departures," and over on the other side were some Sardaukars of Salvation playing music and handing out pamphlets and passing the tambour. I was going to give them a donation and get some religious reading for the quiet times, but apparently the law allows them only to talk to a person going home, not one coming in. Then we went outside, and people were singing and natives were putting strings of beads around everyone's neck. These beads are to pay for things on Gamont, you just pop one off and use it like money. A very pretty little boy came running over to me and Bertha and said are you from Wallach, Sisters Matilda and Bertha? We said yes and he winked and handed us two brown envelopes. We looked inside and, goodness, the necklaces must have had two hundred beads on them. Later a man said, "Hey, you're Bene Gesserit." And we said that's right, how did you know? He said the B.G.'s always get their beads in plain envelopes. I don't think I'll ever spend all my beads — I mean, how much can one person eat and drink? Maybe souvenirs for the sisters in the laundry.

Twosday, neSheustim 26:

I'm exhausted. I woke up when it was still dark because I could hear someone breathing in bed with me, and I thought "Poor Bertha, she must be homesick," and I said "Now, now, Bertha," and I turned the light on. But no, it wasn't Bertha but a very handsome young man with a mustache. And I said "Young man, get out of my bed immediately!" and I thought, some hotel to make a mistake like that! Well, I guess I woke up Bertha, too, and she screamed because there was a man in her bed, and my young man said, "But I am your guide to the pleasures of Gamont," and I said it was too dark to see anything on Gamont. Then I called the manager and things got straightened out. He said Ahmed and Pol (the boys) would be available in the morning to take us sightseeing. I think this vacation is going to be more of a strain than the spring cleaning wash.

I certainly learned things about Gamont when it got light. I thought it was for vacations, like the seaside on Kestrel where my parents used to take me, and people would build sandcastles and swim and eat ices in the evening.

Gamont is not like that.

The whole place is divided into what they call little worlds. You go inside one and you can pretend you are someone in the past or future and they do all sorts of unusual things. We got in a carriage drawn by a thorse and Ahmed and Pol started to show us the sights.

First we went to Eden. There was a woman dressed up like a snake at the entrance who wanted us to check our clothing and pick a costume from the rack. On the rack marked "Adams'' were all these leaves of all different sizes (but fake ones — cotton), but they were all marked "Extra-Large." There were different brands, too, Fig, Conan, Stud, though what kind of a tree a stud is, I can't say. Well, I certainly wasn't going to get undressed, so we didn't go in Eden.

I asked Ahmed if there wasn't a seashore we could go to, and he said sure, and we drove off again. We came to a world called Nantucket, and decided to have lunch before going to the beech. There was a restaurant called The Flipping Frog. Food all right. There was entertainment, too — a man and a woman sang a very funny (but sometimes puzzling) song. Here's what I remember about the beginning:

First the girl sang,

"Who's that knocking on my door?" "Who's that knocking on my door?" "Who's that knocking on my door?" Said the fair young maiden.

The boy answered,

"D' ye ken me still, I'm Barnacle Bill, O' the 'Rakis Royal Navy. And here I stand, come from 'neath the sand, With the 'Rakis Royal Navy."

So the girl told him to wipe his feet upon the mat, but there must have been a hundred verses, and our food came, and I don't remember the rest. Afterwards we went to the beach. Bertha and I had a good time wading and enjoying the sun. Ahmed and Pol played cards.

Oh, I almost forgot: Gamont has seven days in its week. They're called Funday, Manday, Twosday, Womanday, Threesday, Tryitday, and Satyrday. When the couple was singing, Bertha almost choked, she was laughing so hard and her face got so red. I asked her what was wrong, and she said, "When in Gamont, do as the Gamontians do." So I'm dating my diary differently while we're here. It'll be a nice memento.

Womanday, neSheustim 27:

I had a scare today. Went to Harem World and lost Bertha. We put costumes on — pretty things, but sheer, my goodness, you can see right through them. Little sheer pink top. Full, gathered pantaloon thing. Pretty gold belt. Hand wash, I guess, in cold water. But anyway, I think Bertha's getting upset by the excitement or something. I kept my underwear on when I put the costume on, but Bertha didn't. And I started to scold her, but she just gave me that "When on Gamont" business again.

Well, we went into the palace, and it was beautiful, I must say that for it, but a little gaudy — soft music and water splashing in fountains and men and women lolling around in little dark alcoves. Two huge men in turbans took us to reclining harem-chairs, and I guess I went to sleep. When I woke up Bertha was gone. I yelled for Ahmed and Pol and they came running from somewhere pulling their clothes on. I guess they were napping too. So we looked for Bertha through long dark hallways with men in turbans in front of the doors. They wouldn't let me in, so I just called out at each door we came to. Then we came to a door that said "Sultan's Chamber," and it was open, and inside there was Bertha, stark naked, sitting on a big red velvet pouffy cushion thing. I told the boys to shut their eyes and went in. Bertha just kept grinning, and saying, "The Sultan chose me, the Sultan chose me." I got her dressed and the boys helped me take her back to the hotel. I told Pol to stay in the room with her all day tomorrow and make sure she stayed quiet and rested.

Threesday, Jehannesdii, neSheustim 28:

After yesterday's scare and today's shock, I know I'll live forever, because if they didn't kill me, nothing will. There is a Bene Gesserit House on Gamont! Why didn't Mother Caius tell me? I think I know.

Ahmed was driving me in the carriage through the streets, and I was looking at the places — Ol' Plantation, Gay Paree — when I saw a little shop called "Ve Haf Vays" and I told Ahmed to stop. I'd been wanting to get some souvenirs for the sisters at home, and this was a leather-goods store with beautiful belts and boots in the window. Not much of a selection though — everything was black, besides there were too many buckles and straps and things. They even had whips, though why anyone would want to whip a sweet gentle creature like a thorse I don't know. Anyway, there I was in front of the store when I saw the B.G. emblem on the house on the comer. I couldn't believe my eyes. But I was so happy. I went right up to the door and knocked.

A little old sister opened the door, but she seemed surprised to see me — she said "They usually send younger ones." Then she shook her head and said "No accounting for taste" and led me into the parlor. And all over the walls of the parlor were these pictures of women. Well, I won't try to describe them, but let me tell you I recognized some. There was that nice young (and smart) Helen Mohiam, and it's beyond me why she would let them take a picture of her sun-bathing.

The head of the house (I will not call her Mother) came in, her face all painted and her eyelashes all long and black with some stuff on them. She says, "You're not one of my girls. Who are you?"

"No," I said, "I'm Sister Matilda, the head laundress from Wallach come to see your house. Who are you?”

And she said, "I'm the Procuratrix. Are you a lay sister?"

"Certainly not. I am a regularly professed sister and have been for forty years. And what, I'd like to know, is a lay sister?"

She said, "Oh, think of it as a little joke." And then she began the most garbled and incredible story I've ever heard. It seems there are three kinds of sisters — the regular ones that live in the chapter houses, and some that go into the world and marry and have families — well, I knew that — but then there are others, the lay sisters (some joke!), whose job is to infiltrate the Great Houses and let the sisterhood know what's going on.

"Aren't the women sent to the courts regular sisters?" I asked.

"Well, they are," she said, "in a manner of speaking. You know."

"No, I don't," I said.

"Well, put it this way," she said, "they serve as concubines and sometimes even wives. They come here to Gamont to learn the best ways of pleasing themselves and their royal lovers."

Maxine (that was her name) wanted to give me some brandy, but I'd never drink anything in that place. I went back to the carriage and straight to the hotel. Bertha was gone again, but I thought, she's on her own this time. I packed my things. And Bertha came back with Pol, and I said "I'm leaving." But she said, "We have so many beads left." "Do as you please," I said, "but tomorrow I'm going."

Tryitday Phyllisdii Matilda's Day, neSheustim 29:

When I checked out this morning, I just sat in the lobby. I didn't know where to go — I don't care about Eden or The Ol' Plantation or Harem World, but I don't want to go back to Wallach either. I'm not young, I know, but I'm not stupid, and I'm not sneaky, either. There are things I can do, and do well, and that ought to be enough for anybody. I won't use other people because I wouldn't want them to use me, and I won’t be a part of anything that does. I know what my duty is — I need to tell the Emperor just what's going on here — then it's his problem and I wash my hands of the matter. Pol and Ahmed are here — they flipped a coin (they said it's a local custom) and Ahmed is my guide today. So this diary goes in an envelope for the Imperial Mail. I'll have Ahmed take it there, then I'm going to take my bags and go ask for a job at one of the other places I saw. With my experience I know there’ll be something for me to do at "Suds and Bubbles."

*

[scotianostra]

Happy Birthday, Filmmaker Paul McGuigan, born in Bellshill September 19th in 1963.

Paul spent ten years working as a professional photographer for the fashion and music press before becoming a film and television director. His first feature, the television adaptation of Irvine Welsh’s The Acid House won him many admirers and awards followed. His most notable work is the popular TV Conan Doyle version of Sherlock, other TV work includes Monroe, starring James Nesbit, American thriller series, The Family and more recently Marvel’s Luke Cage, and Designated Survivor: both for ABC/Netflix.

His films include Push, Lucky Number Slevin and Gangster No.1 and Stars Don’t Die in Liverpool, stars Annette Bening and Jamie Bell.

More recently Paul has been directing stuff for the small screen with the mini-series Dracula, the American mystery-themed thriller Emergence and one of my favourites, the US crime drama Big Sky. His last big production was the mini-series Inside Man, which has David Tennant in the lead role, which had it's moments, but I wasn't overly impressed with it..

Next up for Paul is another S drama series called Judgement which is described as a high-stakes legal soap.

[kneedeepincynade]

🤡 L'ipocrisia di Stati Uniti ed Unione Europea sta tutta qui. Non serve dire altro! 🤔

🌐 Il Mondo, quello vero, non la «bolla di sapone» costituita solamente da USA e UE, sa bene chi lavora per la Pace, e chi - invece - continua a gettare benzina sul fuoco del Conflitto e ad incassare - con la vendita di armi - enormi profitti 💰

🇨🇳 丢掉幻想，准备斗争 🇨🇳

🌸 Iscriviti 👉 @collettivoshaoshan

🤡 The hypocrisy of the United States and the European Union is all here. Needless to say more! 🤔

🌐 The world, the real one, not the "soap bubble" made up only of the USA and the EU, knows well who works for Peace, and who - on the other hand - continues to throw fuel on the fire of the Conflict and to cash in - with the sale of weapons - huge profits 💰

🇨🇳 丢掉幻想，准备斗争 🇨🇳

🌸 Subscribe 👉 @collettivoshaoshan

[wulanctyas]

Pelatihan Pembuatan Sabun Beras di Desa Mojokembang

Wulan Cahyaningtyas, Mahasiswa Universitas 17 Agustus 1945, KKN di Desa Mojokembang

Mojokembang, 20 Januari 2025 – Mahasiswa Universitas 17 Agustus 1945, Wulan Cahyaningtyas sebagai salah satu anggota Sub kelompok 1 KKN R-15 yang diketuai oleh Rafael Putra Dinata dan didampingi oleh bapak Zida Wahyuddin, S.Pd,. M.Si, yang sedang melaksanakan Kuliah Kerja Nyata (KKN) Reguler-15 di Desa Mojokembang, Pacet, mengadakan pelatihan pembuatan sabun beras dengan nama produk "Berasiya Soap". Pelatihan ini dilaksanakan pada hari Senin, 20 Januari 2025, pukul 14.00 WIB, bertempat di Balai Desa Mojokembang.

Inovasi produk "Berasiya Soap" hadir sebagai solusi alternatif perawatan kulit alami menggunakan bahan dasar beras. Sabun beras, yang terbuat dari bahan-bahan alami, semakin populer sebagai pilihan perawatan kulit yang efektif dan aman, terutama dalam membersihkan dan melembutkan wajah. Keunggulan dari sabun beras adalah kandungan bahan alaminya yang dapat digunakan pada berbagai jenis kulit.

Ujar Alivia sebagai pembawa acara pada saat pelatihan “proses pengolahan sabun ini sangat mudah dibuat dirumah, mungkin bisa menghemat pengeluaran untuk pembelian sabun mandi atau membuat usaha di rumah.”

Pelatihan ini bertujuan untuk memperkenalkan cara pembuatan sabun beras yang sederhana namun efektif. Metode pembuatan sabun beras tidak memerlukan bahan yang sulit dicari dan dapat dengan mudah dipraktikkan di rumah, sehingga membuka peluang bagi masyarakat untuk memulai usaha pembuatan sabun homemade.

Bahan-Bahan yang Diperlukan:

Beras Menir

Soda Api

Minyak Kelapa

Pewangi

Air Sulingan

Metode Pembuatan "Berasiya Soap":

Tuang 240 ml air ke dalam gelas plastik.

Campurkan secara perlahan 45 gram bubuk NaOH (Soda Api) ke dalam air.

Kocok hingga tercampur rata, lalu tunggu hingga cairan berubah menjadi bening (larutan lye).

Campurkan larutan lye ke dalam 700 ml minyak kelapa sawit.

Aduk menggunakan whisk hingga adonan mengental (perkiraan 30 menit).

Masukkan pewangi sekitar 2 tutup botol kecil.

Tuangkan campuran ke dalam cetakan (misalnya cetakan kotak susu).

Tunggu hingga tekstur sabun agak kaku (perkiraan 12-24 jam).

Potong-potong sabun sesuai dengan ukuran yang diinginkan.

Masukkan potongan sabun ke dalam kemasan yang siap dijual.

Dengan mengikuti langkah-langkah ini, diharapkan masyarakat Desa Mojokembang dapat memanfaatkan sabun beras sebagai produk perawatan kulit yang alami dan bahkan menjadikannya peluang usaha. Selain ramah lingkungan, sabun beras juga menjadi pilihan yang aman dan terjangkau.

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[dilebe06]

A portrait Of Jianghu: Reincarnated Disciple

Aggiornamento fino all'episodio 10

Più vado avanti con la visione e più mi chiedo se io mi stia vedendo una sottospecie di soap opera latino-americana.

Sai no, le serie dove ci sono intrallazzi amorosi tra gente che potrebbe benissimo fare la scambista dato il valzer delle coppie... e poi tradimenti, accordi, altri tradimenti, gente che non muore anche se dovrebbe essere crepata settordici volte, sottotrame che non portano a niente, giri inutili, personaggi che si conoscono senza essersi mai presentati...

La cosa per me più pesante è però questo terribile gioco delle "tre carte" - a Portrait sta diventando maestra in questo genere- : ossia quando hai una certa situazione dove i personaggi fanno cose o parlano con altri personaggi per mandare avanti la storia...ma alla fine tutto torna alla situazione iniziale.

Ne è un esempio la dinamica tra le tre famiglie Kong, Daoke e Wuzong. La serie inizia con loro in situazione di stallo avendo tutte lo stesso potere e prosegue facendoci vedere come cercano di prevaricarsi una sull'altra. Bene, alla soglia dell'undicesimo episodio siamo ancora in questa situazione. Nonostante accordi, doppi giochi, proposte matrimoniali, tentativi di omicidio, rapimenti...

Questo ossessivo bisogno di girare in tondo fa si che persino i personaggi, poiché devono parlare del nulla quando si incontrano o ribadire le stesse cose venti volte, facciano pure cose no-sense.

Only Fans, per dirne una, viene catturato dai Daoke. Nonostante il loro Capo sia d'accordo con il Primogenito per uccidere Only Fans, chiamano il Primogenito, minacciandolo di uccidergli il fratello se non gli cedono il possedimento del Molo. Che è esattamente quello che il Primogenito vuole.

In un miscuglio di caos senza logica, il Primogenito, prima firma la concessione del Molo - salvando Only Fans- dopodiché non dà manco il tempo a Only Fans di uscire dalla stanza che strappa l'accordo e condanna a morte il fratello.

Qualcuno mi spieghi il senso di questa scena.

Anche perché nei momenti successivi, possiamo ammirare il Primogenito che guarda con sguardo pienamente soddisfatto il fratello fare un intenso revival della sua morte nel primo episodio. i Daoke una strategia per ammazzare la gente hanno! E quella usano.

E mentre ammiro la capacità polmonare di Only Fans e il disordine degli avvenimenti che stanno accadendo, la mia confusione sale a livelli atomici con l'arrivo della salvatrice Divin Codini.

Oltre a pestare uomini grossi il doppio di lei, salva Only Fans... con l'impostazione delle mani?! aura?! il Qi?! è una super sayan?! perché mo' ha i poteri pure lei? e teletrasporta - con il pensiero?" è un jedi?! usa la forza?! - il suo anello nelle mani di Only Fans perché sfondi a pugni il vetro dove è stato rinchiuso e si liberi.

io comunque sono curiosa di sapere se è possibile rompere sott'acqua un vetro a cazzotti.

Io dico di no.

Ma qui ormai siamo alla fantascienza pura.

Scatta quindi tutto un rissone tra Only Fans e i Daoke - con il Primogenito rimasto a guardare manco fosse al teatro - che si interrompe per l'arrivo di Trinciabue ed anche perché siamo solo alle puntate iniziali. Mica vorrai chiudere troppo presto questa "interessantissima" sottotrama?!

Il fatto di essere stato mandato a morte dal Primogenito non preoccupa minimamente Only Fans. Lui non è uno che se la prende e anzi... assicura il fratello che non è assolutamente interessato alla corsa per il trono. Lui vuole solo salvare Barbie Comunione.

Tra l'altro inserisco qui il fatto che sia il Primogenito che Topolino sanno che Only Fans non è davvero il loro fratello. Ma non è che siano particolarmente stupiti dalla cosa onestamente. Ah, contenti loro.

E a proposito di Barbie Comunione 2.0, chiudiamo questa sottotrama con una lieta novella: dopo 6 puntate delle nozze andate a sangue e morti della prima puntata... Barbie Comunione si sposa!

Di nuovo!

Con il Primogenito nientemeno. auguri e figli che sappiano recitare

Ma oltre a questa trama degna delle peggiori serie a sfondo politico che io ricordi, c'è anche la storia della morte del padre di Only Fans e del Primogenito.

Topolino - che è in questa serie SOLO per scoprire questa cosa perché altro non fa - continua nelle sue indagini che essendo identiche a quelle del poliziotto Cazzo Duro e del Primogenito, mi costringono a guardare in loop le stesse cose.

Senza farla per le lunghe perché la cosa è super noiosa, pare che il diletto padre, si sia tagliato mentre sbucciava una mela e si sia poi avvelenato da solo, giocando a Go con il Primogenito con pedine piene di veleno di medusa.

Viene poi fuori che - interrogato dalla sorella - le meduse che Only Fans/Action Man 2.0 ha in stanza, siano state messe lì dal Primogenito per " ...vedere che faccia avrebbe fatto Action Man 2.0."

maaaaa... una scusa migliore non c'era?!

E' quindi logico supporre che sia stato tutto un piano del futuro sposo di Barbie Comunione 2.0 per uccidere il Padre e incolpare Action Man 2.0 e rubargli al contempo la donna. Genio!

E potrei benissimo comprarmi questa teoria. Ma allora, perché ho perso momenti della mia vita che non torneranno più, a vedere il Primogenito investigare sulla morte del Padre? Se è stato lui che cazzo investighi?! Perché mandare il segretario Bogart - per via del baffo - a indagare sul veleno di medusa se sei stato tu ad usarlo?!

mi sono totalmente persa

E a proposito di scuse imbecilli: Bogart, vedendo che stanno accusando il suo Padrone, si prende la colpa per l'omicidio del Capofamiglia, raccontando alla Polizia uno dei moventi più cretini che io ricordi: " l'ho fatto perché il mio Padrone e Signore meritava di diventare Capo della Famiglia. " e venendo pure processato.

Con questo movente!

Se dovessi scommettere su chi sarà il prossimo a lasciarci punterei su di lui il criceto che non ho.

In tutto questo caos non bisogna scordare che ci stanno pure le ship. una marea di ship

Divin Codini approfitta di aver salvato Only Fans per infilargli l'anello al dito e coronare il suo sogno d'amore - signorina, prima dell'anello, ci sarebbero altre fasi...tipo...non so... amarsi? - ma Only Fans, casto come una vestale, rifiuta le sue avances: avrà anche il fetish dei piedi come un maniaco... ma lui è un uomo puro e fedele alla sua Barbie Comunione. Divin Codini rimane per adesso dunque, solo un amica. per adesso

Per tirare in ballo le altre ship e far entrare in scena il mio personaggio preferito, l'unico che sembra normale assieme all'Emo, bisogna fare un passo indietro e gettarsi a capofitto nella tana del Bianconiglio.

Prima ancora di arrestare Bogart, Cazzo Duro arresta Only Fans per la morte del fratello di Barbie Comunione. Anzi, in realtà, è Only Fans che si fa arrestare perché lui è onesto e trasparente a confronto degli abitanti di questa landa senza nome.

Non resta in cella per molto comunque. Come le altre due volte precedenti evade grazie ai suoi poteri, dimostrando che la tanto sbandierata onestà di prima sta ancora molto lontano da qui.. L'occasione della fuga è il compleanno di Divin Codini - se lo può mai perdere?! - ma anche il tragico comico trattamento che le guardie gli rifilano.

Scarafaggi.

Non so come e nemmeno perché, ma gli agenti di Cazzo Duro sanno che Only Fans schifa i bacarozzi e anzi ne è terrorizzato. Tutto questo per fare scenette divertenti al limite del cringe. e per fare minutaggio

Meglio andare a fare gli auguri a Divin Codini piuttosto, comprandogli anche un regalo lungo la via. E proprio mentre si soffiano le candeline arriva il "vero regalo":

sbuca del nulla un foglio dove viene annunciato che quella sera Barbie Comunione morirà, con a seguito convenientemente data, ora, indirizzo e coordinate di dove avverrà l'omicidio. #sospettino

Barbie, che non so perché si è rimessa i vestiti del cordoglio, viene attaccata da quella che è palesemente la sua guardia del corpo con una maschera. Prima che possa però farle del male, il nostro eroe arriva in suo soccorso, mettendola in salvo e preparandosi ad affrontare il nemico.

Ed è qui che, in una confusione anatomica senza pari, scopriamo chi sia la donna con il segno alla caviglia.

Che non è manco alla caviglia... ma al polpaccio.

Ma quindi, la guardia del corpo di Barbie Funerale vuole ucciderla? Ma perché? si potrebbe domandare uno spettatore ingenuo. Ma siccome io mi sono già vista 10 puntate di questa roba, ho annusato che qualcosa non andava - tolta la confusione generale - già da quando è apparsa la guardia del corpo.

Proseguendo la puntata infatti, Only Fans muore.

Cioè, K.O proprio.

La guardia del corpo diversamente alta - vestito come un usciere di un Luna Park - gli pianta un coltello nel cuore, lo percula e non contento.. gli dà letteralmente fuoco.

E mentre Only Fans esala i suoi ultimi respiri, non riesce a trattenere la confusione - e noi con lui - quando si rende conto che Barbie Funerale non sta scappando dai suoi potenziali assassini ma anzi... con un espressione che nella gamma delle sue espressioni sarebbe un "sono sconvolta", parrebbe che fosse d'accordo con loro per prenderlo in trappola ed ammazzarlo male.

Ovviamente, sul piano narrativo, questa scena ha senso solo se la guardia del corpo alla fine, voglia davvero uccidere Barbie Funerale. Sono 10 puntate che la Sacerdotessa/Dea o chi cazzo è, ci ripete che la donna con il segno rosso ucciderà Barbie Funerale.

Come ripeto dall'inizio della serie, Barbie Funerale si rivela avere un istinto omicida non indifferente a fronte di tutti gli uomini di questa serie che la vorrebbero a casa a fare la calza.

A questo punto, poiché il lead è LETTERALMENTE stato arso vivo - gli hanno gettato addosso litrate di benzina e sono rimasti a guardarlo ardere - mi sono domandata chi avrebbe preso al posto di Only Fans.. l'Emo magari?

No...Only Fans.

MA COME ONLY FANS????!!!!

Gli hanno dato fuoco. L'ho visto bruciare come un legnetto nel camino. E perché non ha manco mezza bruciatura? i vestiti non gli si sono manco sporcati! è ignufugo cazzo?!

No, io adesso voglio sapere come cazzo si è salvato! e che nessuno mi dica che è sceneggiatura, un drama, fantasia, esigenze di trama perché sclero male.

Li ho costretti io sti sceneggiatori a scrivere la scena in cui gli danno fuoco?!

Scrivono scene mirabolanti giusto per fare i fighi e dire due stronzate e poi, sul piano pratico, fanno acqua da tutte le parti.

Ma non solo Only Fans - da adesso Torcia Umana - è illeso ma grazie a questo brutto avvenimento, si è scoperto che la pugnalata al cuore del nano in realtà gli ha colpito i polmoni. Questo perché la Torcia Umana è fatta al contrario: nel senso che il cuore è a destra e gli organi che stanno in basso in realtà sono in alto e viceversa.

E mentre mi perdo a pensare a come possa funzionare anatomicamente una persona fatta così, Ariel Minore che lo ha salvato - La Torcia Umana pensa a salvare Barbie Funerale mentre le donne del suo harem salvano lui - si conferma essere un bel personaggio: dolce, profondo, con un minimo di profondità e spessore.

A differenza di Barbie Funerale che dopo l'omicidio di Torcia Umana va in Chiesa a confessarsi dei peccati commessi con un espressione che di pentimento ha solamente il nome. Guardala come è mortificata!

Barbie Funerale ha ragione comunque ad essere arrabbiata. Tolto il lead - di cui prospetta la morte a giorni alterni, non riesce a farsi rispettare manco dal cane.

Tornata a casa dopo la seratina a base di rogo umano, sgrida le sua guardie del corpo, ree di aver orchestrato l'omicidio di Torcia Umana senza averla avvertirla. Gianni e Pinotto le rispondono che lo hanno fatto perché non potevano sopportare che il colpevole della morte di suo fratello andasse in giro bello tranquillo. ma chi siete?! che volete? chi vi conosce? Che è tutto questo amore e rispetto per Barbie Funerale che avete conosciuto sì e no 2 puntate fa?!

E qui il pensiero vola anche a Bogart del Primogenito e mi domando se qui è normale per dei servitori, camerieri, guardie del corpo, segretari, agire alle spalle del Capo e fare come cazzo gli pare.

Soprattutto quando il tuo Capo ti ordina di non uscire di casa ma tu te ne sbatti le palle e vai al locale a bere e con una delle arroganza più moleste di sempre, ti introduci in camera di una tipa per controllare se la Torcia Umana è nascosta qui.

ma come cazzo di permetti?!!

So' questi i servitori e Barbie è il Capo?! Ma non mi pare...

Ad aver salvato la situazione - manco a farlo apposta - è di nuovo Divin Codini che entra ed esce dalle case, camere, stanze altrui senza nessun problema - mai che ci sia mezza guardia - e ne approfitta per requisire l'amato e rinchiudersi in uno sgabuzzino con lui portando avanti la sua relazione con il lead senza che lui effettivamente lo sappia.

Ma mentre tutte queste donne fanno a botte per contendersi il cuore della Torcia Umana, lui ha occhi solo per Barbie Comunione. L'originals. Quella casta e pura del suo universo - anche perché questa versione gli ha dato elegantemente fuoco - che gli manca così tanto da confondere con Ariel Minore.

Ma mentre altre donne si sentirebbero offese dall'essere scambiate per il cartonato biondo, Ariel abbozza.

Persino quando la sorella maggiore la mette in guardia dall'amare un uomo già impegnato, lei non cede.

" Non è vero amore" le dice saggiamente Ariel Maggiore.

"E va beh... mi accontenterò", risponde seraficamente la sorella.

Ariel Minore d'altronde ha la sua occasione sottomano: il lead ferito che dorme nel suo letto e l'occasione è così ghiotta che presa dagli ormoni non si rende conto di star suonando una musica che non va a tempo e non è manco la stessa di quella che si sente sul video. Potere dell'amore?! o sono gli sceneggiatori che non hanno mai visto un pianoforte?!

Poiché la musica non funziona per accalappiare la Torcia Umana, Ariel Minore usa la tecnica delle citazioni: racconta al lead che vorrebbe tanto andare al mare, che il richiamo delle onde è fortissimo ecc ecc. Ma sta citando la sirenetta? è perché ha i capelli rossi?!

Ma il lead ha altri cazzi a cui pensare. Non solo non ha salvato Barbie Funerale e si è fatto "uccidere" - anche se è vivo e nessuno mi ha ancora spiegato come - ma non ha manco idea di chi sia la donna con il segno rosso sulla caviglia/polpaccio.

Inoltre, siccome le sfighe vengono sempre a coppia, il trauma della coltellata al cuore/polmone è stata così grande che si è anche convenientemente scordato cosa sia successo. Sai no, quel piccolo fatterello che le guardie di Barbie Funerale ti hanno accoppato e lei è rimasta lì accanto a loro a guardarlo crepare... non se lo ricorda.

E come dicevo all'inizio del post... siamo tornati al punto di partenza.

Non sono bellissimi tutti questi giri a vuoto per poi tornare sempre alla stessa situazione?!

Per aggiungere altre sfighe, la coltellata gli ha perforato il polmone...ergo non può più trattenere il fiato ed ergo... non può più usare i suoi poteri.

Mi sembra quindi una buona occasione per cadere in depressione e darsi all'alcool.

La sbronza viene però interrotta da quell'angelo di Ariel Minore che gli ricorda che sono dieci puntate che gli è accaduto di tutto, (rapimenti, omicidi, roghi, tradimenti, accoltellamenti, accuse di omicidio..) e che mancano ancora 14 fantastiche puntate.

In quest'arco di tempo, sai quanto Barbie Funerale puoi salvare o quante volte puoi farti accoppare da lei?

Grazie a queste sagge parole, La Torcia Umana torna in sé e ciò si evince anche dal ritorno della sua grande passione: i piedi. Mentre chiede di vedere gli arti inferiori della donzella per controllare il segno rosso, entra in stanza Divin Codini - ormai casa di Ariel è casa sua - e li vede amoreggiare. Non ci vuole un genio della lampada per sapere che le prossime 3 puntate saranno incentrate sula relazione tra lui e Divin Codini. Sono tutta un fremito.

Chiudiamo questo terrificante commento con un Primogenito pronto alle nozze che a giudicare dal vestito sì è scordato che non è lui la sposa al matrimonio.

[invisibleicewands]

Il Principe Andrea a cuore aperto: “Così i Reali diventano una soap”

“A Very Royal Scandal” su TimVision con Ruth Wilson e Michael Sheen

n’ora di tv ha cambiato il Regno Unito per sempre. Disponibile su TimVision dal 26 novembre, A Very Royal Scandalè la miniserie che ricostruisce l’intervista che il Principe Andrea, Duca di York, ha rilasciato alla giornalista Bbc, Emily Maitlis, per Newsnight in merito al suo coinvolgimento nello scandalo su Jeffrey Epstein, arrestato e condannato per abusi sessuali e traffico internazionale di minori.

Diretti da Julian Jarrold e scritti da Jeremy Brock, i tre episodi di A Very Royal Scandal ripercorrono i giorni che hanno preceduto il faccia a faccia tra Maitlis e il Principe Andrea, rispettivamente interpretati da Ruth Wilson e Michael Sheen. Un’intervista in cui il fratello minore di Re Carlo svelava i dettagli della sua amicizia con l’imprenditore americano e dopo la quale venne costretto alle dimissioni da tutti i ruoli pubblici.

«La più grande pièce teatrale mai vista in tv. Da spettatrice ero rimasta sbalordita, e ho trovato affascinante la possibilità di poter andare dietro le quinte di un evento indimenticabile - dice Ruth Wilson -. Emily Maitlis è stata estremamente generosa. Per anni l’ho seguita in tv come una persona estremamente seria, quando le chiesi se secondo lei fosse colpevole mi ha risposto “colpevole di cosa? Lo sai?”. È un passaggio importante per far capire che non è una giornalista investigativa, ma semplicemente una persona che voleva svolgere bene il suo lavoro, fare le domande giuste, senza esprimere alcun tipo di giudizio».

Michael Sheen, che interpreta il Principe Andrea, non ha avuto chiaramente la stessa possibilità di confrontarsi con il diretto interessato. «Sono partito dall’intervista, l’ho trovata una preziosa fonte di informazioni sul comportamento del Principe Andrea, sulla sua psicologia. Le cose che ha reputato che lo potessero aiutare, gli si sono in realtà ritorte contro, ciò fa emergere una sua percezione del tutto distorta di cosa può essere utile per tutelare la propria immagine. Non sappiamo con certezza cosa sia accaduto realmente. Non esprimo giudizi, mai come stavolta il mistero è un elemento determinante».

Sull’intervista al Principe Andrea era stato realizzato anche un altro film Netflix, Scoop , con Gillian Anderson nel ruolo della Maitlis. Questa è una cosa completamente diversa. «Lì il personaggio principale era Sam McAllister, il produttore di Newsnight - spiega Wilson – Per questione di durata noi siamo andati più in profondità, andando oltre l’intervista, raccontando anche le conseguenze e concentrandoci sui due personaggi coinvolti, che nel film erano più marginali».

Ricordando l’interpretazione di Frost, il conduttore televisivo autore della famosa intervista al presidente Nixon, tre anni dopo il caso Watergate, alla domanda se il giornalismo oggi può essere ancora un mezzo per affrontare il potere, l’attore risponde: «Virginia Giuffrè e le altre vittime di Jeffrey Epstein non avrebbero avuto i mezzi per poter far sentire la loro voce. Il giornalismo ha una grossa responsabilità, deve far sì che chiunque possa esprimersi soprattutto con chi gode di privilegi maggiori. Oggi però il giornalismo investigativo non è tutelato, ed è una cosa molto pericolosa».

The Crown a parte, emerge anche una presa di coscienza che ormai la monarchia inglese sia diventata, nel bene e nel male, puro spettacolo: «I Reali sono diventati intrattenimento, e noi siamo complici. Amiamo il gossip, e dunque ci nutriamo delle notizie che li riguardano, trasformandoli nella miglior soap opera di sempre» conclude Wilson.

[omarfor-orchestra]

Personaggi preferiti di mare fuori e perchè?

Eccomi anon, posso rispondere tutti? AHAHHAHA

No allora ne prendo 4 e mentre penso ai personaggi realizzo che c'è parecchio lavoro da fare sullo sviluppo di quelli femminili perché signor giudice, sembra quasi che vogliano chiudere le loro storie il prima possibile ancora prima di iniziarle (coff coff viola coff coff)

Comunque direi:

-Filippo. Dal punto di vista narrativo è stata una genialata usare lui per fare approcciare il pubblico a quelle dinamiche specifiche senza darle per scontate. Le scopri con lui che ne è esterno e ti è trasparente il disagio, il terrore, la confusione. Come sviluppo mi è piaciuto molto, perché si è vista la crescita e la maturazione, si parte da un ragazzino che nuota a fatica in un oceano sconosciuto e si arriva ad un uomo che si assume le sue responsabilità, comprende meglio le decisioni da prendere ed è in generale più sicuro delle sue capacità e dei suoi limiti. Poi ha un neurone che si accende e si spegne ad intermittenza in presenza dell'innamorata making him the wettest most pathetic mewmew in the world che non guasta mai

-Nad. Non sono d'accordo con chi dice che il personaggio è stato sacrificato per la coppia. Parte indipendente, intraprendente, sicura e con il solo obiettivo di essere libera, sì, ma come dice lei. Ad un certo punto raggiunge un fondo che sperava di non vedere mai, rinuncia alla libertà perché non ha più speranza in un futuro (ed è certa di non meritarselo, quel futuro con Filippo che ha sognato, di non esserne all'altezza, che il suo destino è già segnato) eppure lo abbraccia quando se lo ritrova davanti. Ritorna la guerriera di prima appena torna la speranza, si bea della consapevolezza che qualcuno abbia finalmente lottato per lei, per la sua libertà, realizza di non essere più sola nel mondo e, per questo, diventa ancora più forte. C'è qualcuno che è disposto a prendersi cura di lei, ma la spaventa il limite inesistente di ciò che Filippo sembra disposto a fare, la terrorizza l'idea di averlo trasformato in qualcosa che non è lui. Amo questo aspetto del loro sviluppo, il fatto che abbiano dovuto avvicinarsi l'uno al mondo dell'altra quasi all'estremo, per poi ritrovarsi nel mezzo perché sono mondi che si possono mescolare, non è necessario annullare uno e crescere nell'altro. Nad fa un sacrificio enorme lasciandolo andare, per non cambiarlo. Filippo fa un sacrificio enorme con l'evasione, abbandonando la realtà agiata che aveva e che non tornerà mai più.

-Carmine. Il simbolo della serie per eccellenza, ciò che la gente avrebbe dovuto cogliere senza perdersi dietro a drama inutili e inciuci da soap opera. È quello col destino scritto che se ne fotte, quello che vuole cambiare le cose, che non ci sta, che combatte il sistema anche quando sembra inutile e controproduttivo farlo, quello che prova, sempre, a ricordare agli altri che prima di essere camorristi sono ragazzi, che le possibilità ci sono, se le si sanno cogliere. È anche quello che si prende tutta la merda degli sceneggiatori che non sanno dove mettere, ma non possiamo fargliene una colpa perché anche lui aveva bisogno di cadere per rialzarsi più convinto di prima. Unica pecca del personaggio altrimenti perfetto è sta storia con Rosa che ha avuto uno sviluppo affrettato, con poco senso e pure brutto, perché oggettivamente le scene di confronto sono state quante? 4/5? E le battute erano sempre le stesse. Bella l'idea di farle cambiare fazione con la forza dell'ammore, ma in un episodio si menano e nell'altro lei si spara per non fargli del male? Boh ok (è una fiction rai2 comunque, non pretendevo nulla di più)

-Cardiotrap. DA DOVE COMINCIO. Ho dei sentimenti contrastanti sul suo sviluppo, perché gli voglio un bene fisico e vorrei non soffrisse mai però ha abbastanza senso il suo percorso. Ha evidentemente un senso di colpa enorme su cui forse avrebbero dovuto marciare di più (lui si t4glierebbe in una situazione più realistica, siamo onestə) sia nei confronti della vecchietta sia della madre. Ripudia la violenza ma vi si rifugia ancora nelle dinamiche del carcere, forse un po' per stanchezza e un po' per sicurezza, come se volesse lottare ma non avesse ancora i mezzi giusti per farlo. Li trova in Carmine e Filippo (quando smetto di pensare a un profe per questo ve lo faccio sapere) e nella musica, sua alleata e compagna ancora prima degli altri, unica via d'uscita in quel tunnel senza fine da cui non sembra poter scappare. Li trova in Gemma, che è anche la sua rovina. Più che salvarsi dalla violenza ha forse fatto un percorso ancora più importante, che è stato quello di riconoscere la violenza, vederla, prima di poterne scappare. Il problema ora è che l'ha trovata anche dentro di sé e ne sta quasi soccombendo, ma c'è anche talmente tanto amore che salvare Gemma da se stesso è l'ultimo atto che riesce a compiere, prima di lasciarsi travolgere. Non è bello, ma è un passaggio necessario per liberarsi dal male. Tocca trovare la forza per farlo, ora.

[angrennufuin]

Ranking meme: 1. Worst kissers, 2. Best Dancers, 3. Best... hair? O:

Three!!!! I'm gonna answer these in different posts and just link back.

Best Hair

An excuse for me, Mirkwood Angrennufuin, to talk about hair?? Ohoho. >:3

Aysel - I latched on to a blog post about Lhazaareen pirates being very proud of their hair and extrapolated wildly! So Aysel has midback-length black hair (she shaved it when she was young and mourning, but it has grown back) that she keeps meticulously trimmed, oiled, and otherwise cared for. Nobody else on this list spends even a fraction of the effort on hair health that she does, or has as elaborate and specific a hairstyle. I haven't worked out what all her braids mean, but they definitely mean something -- I like the idea of Aysel braiding prayers or good-luck charms into her hair every morning. I'll put Alis's design notes on her hairstyle at the bottom of this post, but the idea was to give an impression of wild, free-flowing hair that nonetheless is kept out of her face in high winds.

Sûl is an elf and therefore has great hair by default, but doesn't get to be top of the list because she in no way places as much importance on her hair as Aysel does. She has wavy, light brown hair that she mostly wears up or half-up; it's prone to frizz in humidity and a little damaged from her periods of illness. She likes her hair well enough, but has no qualms cutting or dying it as needed. Privately thinks she could rock the bald look but Would Prefer Not To.

Linmir has very silky, very smooth, very straight hair that WAS a beautiful silver-grey and has now turned moon-white, and she doesn't do much to it. (Half-)elf privilege strikes again! When she was younger, she wore it loose (slicked back with camellia oil whenever her aunt could grab her for long enough), and then started wearing it in a high ponytail and dying the ends maroon at the suggestion of her ex. She kept it like that until she got a Dramatic Haircut just before the final battle; a dramatic use of her paladin powers had turned her hair white (with a single gold streak), and she bobbed it.

Rosenrot has long pre-Raphaelite curls in dark brown that she does a moderate amount of maintenance on but largely just keeps in two big braids. It was a great trial to her as a kid, because it's a lot of hair to keep track of for a little girl, and she would sometimes cry while trying to get it untangled. Even now, she usually wheedles Bene or his mom Philomena into doing her braids for her. I don't think she's ever cut it, and I don't think it would occur to her to do so. She loves having it played with.

Silence's hair is bobbed because it's the Fantasy 1920s, but also because when she was ten she got chewing gum stuck in it and it had to get chopped. Her mom's declaration was that she can grow her hair out again when she can prove herself responsible enough to care for it, but Silence kinda likes it short. It only takes ten minutes to brush! It's also lavender and thick but almost pin-straight; she's got major my little pony vibes.

Nee has very wild blonde curls that she has NOT been caring for or maintaining properly lately. She was okay at them in Wizard Grad School, but she's been living rough while on the adventure. And magic makes them do strange and arcane things, so she's largely just clipped them back and given up.

Hongyan has lovely hair (black, hip-length, tiny bit of wave) that he almost certainly has not brushed for the... Month? Two months? Ish? That he's been human. He has been bathed but mostly with like, bar soap. It's a mess. He preens it occasionally but he doesn't understand how hair works, really.

Asa is most frequently perceived as an amorphous blob of wild green curls, which they absent-mindedly tie trinkets and treasures and plants into whenever they feel like it. It's great hair! I love it! It is not, by most people's standards, a candidate for Best Hair.

Aysel hair design:

Asa's mushroomy head:

Next two asks:

[Best Dancer]

[Worst Kisser]

[occhidelmondo]

Cara Francesca,

Sei orgogliosa di me? Lo so, potevo studiare di più, ma lo sai come sono.

Sei felice di vedermi crescere? Tu mi manchi tantissimo, ho bisogno di te, ma tu non puoi più tornare qui. Mia adorata maestra manchi tanto... Lo immaginavi che sarebbe stato così?

Sai ho iniziato a capire che per far questo percorso devo imparare a saper stare da sola, ma è così triste non poter più parlare con te. Ascoltare la tua voce, sentire le tue storie, le tue centrifughe scainiche, la storia della musica raccontanta come una soap opera e ambientata ai giorni nostri, insomma mi manchi tanto tanto. Devo studiare di più, lo so bene cercherò di fare del mio meglio.

Vorrei un tuo abbraccio, un tuo consiglio, una tua parola, ti vorrei qui. Mi manchi tanto.