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fandom-necromancer · 4 years ago

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‘You come here often?’ ‘Well I work here.’ Part 4

This was prompted by the lovely AO3 user LoafofCat! Enjoy!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900 [Read complete on AO3]

‘You know, if you just wanted to see me, there would be easier ways.’ ‘Bold of you to assume I come here only to see you.’ Nines smiled looking up to Gavin, who was just untying his apron and sitting down in front of him with a coffee of his own. ‘Am I wrong then?’, the human asked and Nines huffed, letting his head fall. ‘No’, he admitted. ‘Okay, so let me get this right’, Gavin laughed. ‘I had to propose to my boss to get thirium drinks on the menu as a “costumer asked for it” and it might help us crank those numbers up, just so you could plant your ass here in your break?’ ‘It did get you more costumers though’, Nines shrugged pointing to the other tables. ‘That’s not- Nines, do you think I care about this shop? I just work here; I don’t care if… You know what? Screw it. Nice to see you, Nines.’ ‘Nice to see you too’, the android chuckled. ‘How are you?’ ‘Can’t complain. What do you have there?’

Nines looked down on the tablet in his hands. ‘Oh, just work. A case.’ ‘You are on your break and brought work?’, Gavin asked, looking at him sceptically. ‘Tina was right, you really are me just with a little less personality.’ ‘Being nice and polite doesn’t mean not having a personality. You were just an asshole.’ ‘What technically is a personality trait’, Gavin argued, taking a sip from his coffee. ‘Now come on, tell me about your case!’ Nines frowned. ‘I really can’t tell you, it’s-‘ ‘Confidential, I get it. But come on, I’m a former cop I can keep a secret. For old time’s sake.’ The android eyed Gavin and how he looked so eager to get information. It was cute in a way, how he looked in between his eyes and the tablet in his hands. Maybe that’s why Nines showed weakness and caved in.

‘Okay, but you really keep this to yourself. We are investigating a series of murders. They don’t have anything in common in regard to victims or how the deed was done or staged, but at every crime-scene we found the picture of this man.’ Nines flipped through the pictures of the different crime-scenes until he reached a few portraits. They weren’t really the kind of pictures you would expect of a cold-blooded serial-killer. Not after the few flashes of gruesome staging, Gavin caught a glimpse of as Nines had searched for these. They all portrayed a middle-aged man with a small belly you could easily get if you worked long hours in the office and were too exhausted afterwards to do sports. The pictures looked like they were ripped right out of a family photo-album. The guy was at the beach smiling at the camera with a cocktail in hand. The next one showed him in what Gavin supposed to be his home with a small dog on his lap. Then next to a ridiculously oversized barbeque grill all shiny chrome and reds.

Gavin lifted a brow at Nines. ‘Yeah, sorry Nines, but no way this is your killer.’ ‘I ruled it out as unlikely, too’, the android nodded. ‘Although you can never know with people. At the very least it’s a lead. Maybe the killer knows this man. As much as this is a lead, it is also our only link.’ Gavin shrugged, leaning back. ‘Well, why haven’t you solved it then? I mean, you can scan his face and get a name, age, address, likely even social media as creepy as they designed you and Connor. No offense there.’ Nines sighed. ‘As creepy as I might be designed, my scanner has its limits too. I can’t get a name to this man, not even an age. Scanning him just returns an error. Manual research in the police databanks also hasn’t brought up anything yet. We also can’t exactly go around asking for this man. If he is the serial killer, as unlikely as it might seem, we would only alert him.’ Gavin nodded absent-mindedly, staring at the photo, pulling the tablet closer to zoom in on some details. ‘Honestly?’, Nines said frustratedly. ‘We’re all currently waiting for the forensics to find more evidence on the bodies. It’s quite frustrating, but at the same time no one really minds if I spend a bit longer on my break with you.’

Gavin couldn’t help but let out an exaggerated ‘Awww’ at that, Nines reprimanded with an annoyed but amused look. ‘Nah, really thanks, looking at your tablet for what, ten minutes? This was already more exciting than the whole damn month. The most action I had was a drunk guy I had to escort out because everyone else was too chicken shit to risk getting vomited on.’ ‘Understandable.’ ‘Not the point. I mean, I’m happy here, I guess. It is decent money and I have more time for my cats at home. Also, maybe not being confronted with what humans are capable of is nice for a while. But I can basically feel my brain rot here.’ ‘That is also understandable’, Nines huffed. ‘Maybe search for some outside work activity? Something new to learn and keep you active mentally?’ ‘Like what? Knitting?’ ‘If you want that?’ ‘You know what? Maybe not the worst idea. I’ll see if I can find anything and when I have I will-‘

Nines never got to find out what Gavin would do afterwards, as his colleagues called him, pointing at the growing queue. The human sighed. ‘Well, my call to duty’, he announced and walked over to press a quick kiss to the android’s temple. ‘Was nice chatting with you, babe. Good luck with your case.’ ‘Yeah, you too.’

It was a slow Tuesday, without many costumers coming in. The rush of office workers in their break had already stormed the small shop and rushed back to their workplace and now it was mostly a few students and the regular old granny circle in the front judging people and eating cake. Living the life. Gavin had already washed the entire stack of mugs twice now and was out of work, except for manipulating the radio until his co-workers began to wonder why the last song had been so long and found him messing with the system. Then he walked around, collecting discarded newspapers and cleaning the tables while his co-worker told him she would be out for a cigarette. He nodded and continued working until a sole costumer entered. Gavin quickly rubbed the table dry and hurried over, throwing the man an extra smile just in case he wanted to complain about having to wait a few seconds. ‘What can I do for you?’ ‘I’d like a coffee, please. Medium, to go with cream but no sugar.’ ‘Coming right up.’ Gavin was already going through the motions of preparing the coffee and turned around to hand it over. ‘Anything else…’ He trailed off, as he saw the man’s face, but he seemingly hadn’t noticed his slip. ‘No, thank you, that would be all.’

Gavin watched him leave again and was trying to decide what to do next. He couldn’t just leave; he was at work after all. But he couldn’t do nothing either. Frantically he looked through the shop and, in the end, shook his head, rushing past the counter. Outside his co-worker stopped him. ‘Gavin? What are you doing?’ Gavin blinked, but came up with an excuse fast enough: ‘Dude forgot his wallet. Can you take over for a moment? Sorry!’ ‘Sure, no problem. Just hurry, he’s already behind the corner.’

Gavin did hurry. But not to run after the man, but to pull out his phone. ‘Nines? Yes, hi babe I know you are at work, shut up, this is work. Li-Listen, yes. Shut up for just a second! I’m pursuing your office killer. Ye-Yes, exactly, the beach holiday photo model with the ugliest dog I’ve seen in my life. Now will you phcking get your ass here? I will pursue him you can track my phone. Wh- come on, it can’t be that dangerous, I’m still well trained now stop worrying and move your ass!’

He had become louder than he wanted and had caused the man he wanted to follow inconspicuously to turn around. He wasn’t really unsuspicious though, dressed in the silly coffee-shop apron and shouting at someone on the phone. Trying to play it down, Gavin instead tried the open approach: ‘Hey, you forgot your wallet!’ It only caused the man to bolt. So much for being a friendly, costumer-orientated employee. Gavin pushed it all to hell, lifting up his apron and running after the man. So, he did had dirt on him. Gavin followed him down the street and used a streetlight to take the corner with more speed. A mistake he later would regret as he ran face first into a fist that definitely wasn’t human. Seeing stars, he looked up from where he had fallen against the building. The chubby man was surprisingly agile and fast, unfitting to his overall completely average looks. And Gavin saw why: The skin where the man had punched him had retracted to show stern white underneath. The man was an android? Where the hell did he get all these modifications from? Cyberlife had designed all androids to be phcking inhuman models. But maybe that had been the plan. Being as inconspicuous as possible. Remembering the brief flashes of crime-scenes that made him pale. Oh no.

‘How the hell did some barista recognise me, huh?’, the android asked, holding Gavin by the throat, his toes barely touching the ground. ‘You are all over the news!’, Gavin tried. ‘I’m not. None of my doings have even been published yet.’ ‘Well, I was a cop once.’ ‘Were you? Well, who is your contact then? If you were a cop once.’ Gavin really hoped someone would turn the corner and see this to help him. Because the way the android’s hand clenched around his throat, lack of oxygen could soon be his least concern. ‘My boyfriend, okay? But I will never tell you his name!’ ‘Your boyfriend? Alright, thank you. After I killed you, I will go to him next. See if I can’t keep this information from spreading.

The pressure on his throat became almost unbearable, as Gavin saw a flash of white behind the man. ‘I highly doubt that’, Nines voice sounded through the alley and Gavin could see the gun aimed at his head. ‘Now let him down and go.’ The android in front of Gavin cursed, but complied. ‘You are arrested for the suspected murder of three people, as well as the attempted murder of this man. Turn around, hands behind your back.’ Nines handcuffed him, reading him his rights before making the call to the station to send a car.

‘Gavin, that was extremely reckless of you.’ ‘Hey, I got your killer, right?’, Gavin croaked with a cocky grin while rubbing his throat. ‘I solved a case you would have waited weeks on before even getting close to the guy.’ ‘Oh, please, I’m the most advanced android there is. I would have gotten him.’ ‘Yeah, but it was the ex-detective they threw out to replace with you that caught him in the end. Please, rub that into Fowler’s face for me, would you?’ ‘I most certainly won’t’, Nines stated. ‘I will emphasize your involvement in this case though, what at least should keep your employer off your ass.’ ‘Oh, what would I do without you?’ The android in Nines grip struggled against him, causing Nines to return his attention to him. ‘Urgh, get a room, you two!’ ‘Excellent idea actually. Gavin, how about after our shifts ended, we meet at my place? You know? To celebrate.’ ‘Oh, I’d love to’, Gavin grinned and winked the RK900.

The captive criminal got a glimpse of the gesture and regretted it deeply. ‘Oh, please, just kill me, would you?’

#detroit become human #dbh #Reed900 #RK900 #Gavin Reed

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miharou · 6 years ago

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Years’ worth

Title: Years’ worth

Pairing: He Tian x Mo Guan Shan

Rating: T

Summary: It was supposed to be just a fancy bbq. Nothing more.

Note: This takes place after the time skip when the boys are few years older!

AN: This fic was based on this ask (ask concerns chapter 284), it somehow inspired me, but the outcome wasn’t what I expected at all (lol)… Because somehow this turned a lot hornier (and like +1000 words longer) than it was supposed to?? Oh well… Not sure what to think. So let me know what you think!

AO3

Years’ worth

Right now, Guan Shan could immediately tell what He Tian had in mind. He had seen that look on his face before, had seen that body language before, the way his eyes lingered a little longer than usual, his dark eyes staring straight at him before he would come for him. Not that there was much distance to close between them in begin with, after all, he was already right there, sitting next to him, his presence looming over him possessively. Guan Shan had told him to sit on the other side of the table, but no, it was He Tian he was talking to, of course he did just what he wanted. It wasn’t that the seat was cramped, no, on the other hand, it had plenty of room for two people, but being trapped between a wall and He Tian often led to… things. Things that which made Guan Shan often lose his cool and want to punch or get away from He Tian, things that which made his pulse rate instantly rise to heavens and neck unwantedly throb, almost as if expecting, remembering the gentle, barely touching lips on his skin and tightly hugging arms around his body… And this scent. He Tian’s scent. Guan Shan could feel He Tian’s body inching closer to his, his heat prying on his skin. Or maybe the heat and hotness in the air was coming the big barbeque grill on the table, the private room He Tian had reserved for dinner ridiculously fancy and the restaurant surely expensive as hell, the meat on the plates waiting to be grilled looking absolutely mouthwatering.

“Cut the crap, you’re too close,” Guan Shan nudged He Tian with his elbow and surprisingly he backed off a little. Damn his heart was racing. Racing so hard he thought it would jump out of his chest, his palms already slightly sweaty. His eyes darted back to the food the waiter had just brought in. Everything looked amazing, various foods neatly and beautifully placed on the plates, almost too fancy to even eat. The meat in particular, it looked high class, just like the ones he had seen on some tv-shows his mom had watched at home every now and then, some shows about people trying out high cuisine restaurants. He gulped, betting it would taste nothing like he had had before. His mind on the food he picked up the chopsticks and moved some of the meat on the grill, delicious aromas instantly filling the air.

It seemed like for once He Tian was taking the hint, it amazed Guan Shan a bit.

Or at least it seemed so. For 5 seconds or so.

Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched, huh?

Guan Shan could recognize that hand anywhere. Unexpectedly, his heart skipped a beat and he blamed it on the suddenness, the element of surprise his excuse on everything. The fingers curled around his nape, and for a moment he felt uncomfortable. What if He Tian could feel his pulse on his neck? Because his heart was already back to going crazy, tension building in his muscles at his own awareness of the situation. What was it with him today? He was already used to He Tian and his manners for no personal space, his way of invading his personal space and touching him easily, and for some odd reason he especially seemed to like his neck area, it really was his favourite spot Guan Shan had come to notice… But if he was so used to it, why was he so aware of everything today? A slight massage on his nape kept his thoughts on the matter, He Tian’s fingers gently rubbing over his skin again and again. His touch was hotter than usual, a shiver or two running along Guan Shan’s spine along the movements. The air in the room still felt weirdly hot. Guan Shan glared at the grill, determined it was the cause for the sweat slowly gathering on his skin. He Tian’s fingers grazed over the black stud on left his ear, and Guan Shan could feel his stare on him. He tilted his head so he could give him a death stare. He was here to eat, not for any bullshit. He Tian didn’t seem to mind anything, his mood not swayed at all. A teasing smile grew on his lips.

“Little Mo, what’s that look for?”

The chopsticks still on his other hand, Guan Shan’s free hand slashed to remove He Tian’s from his neck, and impatiently he went for He Tian’s neck instead, the distance between them diminishing greatly. The dark eyes staring at him narrowed slightly, but Guan Shan could tell that He Tian wasn’t really that alarmed. Somehow it pissed him off. He gripped a little firmer and long fingers wound up around his wrist, question following from the satisfied looking lips: “What comes next?”

He could feel that breath on his skin, warm air passing softly on his already heated skin. Guan Shan looked at He Tian’s moving mouth, a thought dawning on his mind: since when had he lowered his gaze down to He Tian’s lips? His eyes shot back at waiting dark eyes, the sizzle of cooking meat suddenly loud in his ears. He Tian was already leaning in, Guan Shan’s body instinctively leaning away from him, but black hair was already reaching his eye level and coming closer. He knew what was coming next, what it would feel like, He Tian had done it occasionally, and Guan Shan knew and did not knew what it all meant. His breath picked up, mind slowly going blank as heated blow of air landed on his sweaty skin. He waited for it, wanted it, expected it, but one thing still bothered him: why was it so damn hot in this room? His grip on He Tian was already nonexistent, fingers slipping away from his skin and before he knew it, he had fixed his touch, thump sliding under his jaw while the rest of his fingers rested on the side of his head, his now firm hold forcing He Tian to look up at him. It didn’t take even a second, He Tian’s eyes widening significantly at the change of plans as Guan Shan awkwardly looked down at him, a nervous breath on his lips before he closed the gap and pressed his lips on He Tian’s. He hadn’t planned on doing this today, but he had admitted to himself that this would happen eventually, how, when, where, he hadn’t ever thought that far. Unlike he imagined, He Tian was oddly obedient, not an inch of movement from his side for the second or two his lips rested against He Tian’s. Hesitantly, Guan Shan broke off, his eyes lingering on He Tian’s lips before he was mentally ready to back away and face the look on He Tian. When he finally got back some of his personal space and dared lift his gaze, he was met with a stunned, dumbfounded face, and Guan Shan kind of wanted to mock him for being so taken by surprise. Just as he snickered smugly and was about to retort something nasty, a strong palm reached in his short hair and pulled him back, heavy breath landing on lips before stealing them in another kiss. It was nothing like his nervous, brief, heart beating touch, no, this was clearly hungry, experimenting, He Tian trying his boundaries, desperate desire unleashing as he pried his lips kiss after kiss. Guan Shan was overwhelmed, unable to do anything than kiss back for a moment, accept all of those devouring kisses eating him, breath jagged as he a moment later tried to break apart, his words dropping one by one from lips. Fuck, he was going to kill He Tian..!

“The meat… is going… to burn…!!!”

Guan Shan’s breath hitched loudly as something slipped inside his mouth, He Tian’s tongue soon going over for a brief swipe to taste his. A quiet hum of satisfied moan landed on Guan Shan’s ears, and he felt his already hot face radiate even stronger. Why did that just now sound… that good? Everything was on fire, his senses overloading as he kissed He Tian back, out of breath, lips throbbing hotly against each kiss he received, each kiss he gave back to He Tian. He took his palm against He Tian’s chest, trying to get him to calm down, trying to get him come to his senses and it seemed like he finally took the hint, their hard breaths mingling as He Tian stopped his selfish advances. A second or five passed, Guan Shan easing his death grip on the chopsticks he still held on his other hand. He leaned away, claiming his own personal space back and taking one more look of still a bit breathless He Tian. A stupid mistake, he soon found out.

“Thanks for the meal,” He Tian said, a twist of playfulness and satisfaction on his lips soon after.

“We haven’t even started eating yet?!” Guan Shan fumed, hurriedly facing the table and working on the meat in the barbeque grill, “And asshole, what were you going to do if this meat had burned into ashes?! You shouldn’t waste food! Especially this expensive!”

“So fierce, little Mo~! I’ll treat you something better, come to my place today after this.”

“Go to hell.”

“Is that a yes?”

Guan Shan gathered the half burned meat in a plate and pushed it in front of He Tian.

“This is your fault. You eat it. And DON’T say whatever you’re about to say.”

He Tian reached towards Guan Shan. He was on alert, the greasy chopsticks in his hand swiftly between them like a barrier.

“I’m starving.”

“Eat your food,” Guan Shan nodded coldly towards the plate.

“I’m not talking about that.”

Fuck. He felt the heat instantly on his face. He cursed his expressive body.

“Scram already.”

He Tian retreated back, grabbing a pair of chopsticks for himself from the table. He glanced back at Guan Shan, his face still a match with his red hair.

“I love it when your body’s so honest~”

“What the chicken dick are saying, fuck, you’re ruining the dinner…” Guan Shan grumbled annoyed. It was impossible to make a dent on He Tian’s mood when he was feeling that good. He had tried before a few times and it never worked. It annoyed the hell out of him, but as he grilled the meat, the food was soon the only thing he could think of. The texture and flavour was pure bliss as he expected, nothing compared to the cheap meat he bought for dinner, it was such a shame he could not have this every day. He ignored the annoying pest next to him, He Tian’s chopsticks moving around the burned bits on his plate while throwing side glances at Guan Shan. After the meal, He Tian promised to drive Guan Shan back, telling him he would take him home, home ending up meaning He Tian’s home. That evening his lips throbbed, his red, thin lips turning puffy and sore as He Tian craved for years’ worth of his lips.

#19 days #tianshan #old xian #he tian #mo guan shan #my fanfiction

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arplis · 6 years ago

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Wide temperature range the candy thermometer temp measurement range from 58℉ to 572℉(-50℃ to 300℃) perfect for grilling on your hot oil, home-make dessert, candy, deep fry food, make the restaurant-quality food for your family and friends. Lifetime warranty habor provide a 45-day money back & lifetime warranty feel free to contact us. GDEALER Instant Read Thermometer Super Fast Digital Electronic Food Thermometer Cooking Thermometer Barbecue Meat Thermometer with Collapsible Internal Probe for Grill Cooking Meat Kitchen Candy GDEALER Instant Read Thermometer Super Fast Digital Electronic Food Thermometer Cooking Thermometer Barbecue Meat Thermometer with Collapsible Internal Probe for Grill Cooking Meat Kitchen Candy - Smart design auto-shut off to save battery life if readout stays for 10 minutes stainless foldable tapered probe-length 11cm, simply pull out the probe, insert into your food or liquid and read the temperature. Super fast thermometer instant digital readout within 4-6 seconds for meat and 4-20 seconds for liquid,°f/°cswitchable, auto shut-off and hold feature, large lcd display easy to carry and store in your kitchen drawer perfect for kitchen, outdoor cooking, bbq, liquid, food, meat, candy, coffee, milk and bath water temperature. Detailed meat temperature chart you can quickly check the ideal temperature for your beef, lamb, pork, steak, chicken, turkey or fish. Wide temperature range of -58°f to 572°f(-50-300°c), accurate to ±01ºf (between -4ºf to 392ºf) makes these utensils the best for use when grilling on your gas barbecue or turkey fryer, making candy, using hot oil to deep fry, brewing beer and wine and even making cheese and bread. 100% money back and lifetime guarantee now share it with your family and friends, do not miss the good times this thermometer can bring you. Habor Instant Read Meat Thermometer, Accurate Cooking Thermometer Electronic Kitchen Thermometer with Digital LCD, Fordable Long Probe for Food Christmas Turkey, Candy, Cake, Milk, BBQ Grill Smokers Habor Instant Read Meat Thermometer, Accurate Cooking Thermometer Electronic Kitchen Thermometer with Digital LCD, Fordable Long Probe for Food Christmas Turkey, Candy, Cake, Milk, BBQ Grill Smokers - 【Easy to use】1open and clean 48″ stainless foldable probe 2plug cooking thermometer into meat, candy, coffee, tea, milk or bathing 3press “start” button and wait about 5 seconds 4then readout the temperature on the large digital lcd (never use the meat thermometer in a closed oven). 【Super fast instant read thermometer】this meat thermometer can read out temperature in 4-6 seconds, a must have kitchen tool for christmas turkey, staek, cake, pie, cookie, a practical kit for thanksgiving dinner that works great with baster and roaster. 【More accurate readout】we habor produce high precision sensor chip and super thin thermometer probe tip in the package box, there is cooking temperature guide for those chef’s gift. 【powerful magnetic function】kitchen thermometer built in strong magnet allow to hang candy thermometers on refrigerator door, barbecue rack, cupboard, or any iron surface further more, hanging hole is handy for wall hook. 【Lifetime warranty】we habor grill thermometer provide lifetime warranty please rest assured to get one in your cookroom【lr44 button battery included】(smart battery-saving function with auto-shut off after 15 minutes). 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Longer and foldable probe 48 inches longer sensitive probe,make sure never burn your fingers foldable probe is also a great design for storage. Super fast instant read！habor meat thermometers can read temperature out in 4-6 seconds no worry overcook again a must have kitchen tool for christmas turkey, steak, cake, pie, cookie, a practical kit for thanksgiving dinner that works great with baster and roaster. 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Meat Thermometer YXwin Cooking Thermometer Digital Instant Read Thermometer Foldable Steel Probe Magnetic Kitchen Thermometer Red Meat Thermometer YXwin Cooking Thermometer Digital Instant Read Thermometer Foldable Steel Probe Magnetic Kitchen Thermometer Red - Simple use, press the power on, dislodge the long wireless probe from its folded lock position, insert it into your food and in 4-5 seconds you will have accurate and easy to read temperatures on an lcd display with backlight, no more burning or sweating waiting for the gauge to stabilize. Multi function, yxwin kitchen thermometer measures temperature accurately and ensures perfect cooking not only of hard but also liquid meals it is suitable for gas bbq, turkey/chicken fryer, baby food, making sugar/candy or even baking. Super fast reading, yxwin meat thermometer gets temp readout within 4-7 seconds you know the exact temperature of your meal on a digital lcd display quick thermometer measuring is secure for your baby. Highly accurate, yxwin cooking thermometer includes the high precision temperature sensor, accurate to ±1°f (between -4°f to 392°f), you can grill meat to your perfect doneness knowing and no need to worry about overcooked or burnt any more. Visibility performance, no matter the circumstance or visibility situation, the backlight provides great lighting to enable reading temperatures on display, the digital read is clear even with smoke over the bbq, water,or at night indoor, outdoor and is splash proof. Fayogoo Instant Read Meat Thermometer,Accurate Waterproof Digital Meat Thermometer Kitchen Thermometers with Large Backlit LCD for Candy, Milk, Tea, BBQ Grill Smokers (Red) Fayogoo Instant Read Meat Thermometer,Accurate Waterproof Digital Meat Thermometer Kitchen Thermometers with Large Backlit LCD for Candy, Milk, Tea, BBQ Grill Smokers (Red) - ✓Instant digital read thermometer measures temperature within 2-4 seconds with high precision sensor,unfold/fold the probe,and the thermometer will turn on/off automatically,long-lasting battery life. ✓Long folding probe is made of food grade stainless steel and the case material is reliable and high-temp resistantthe kitchen cooking thermometer inside has a magnet, so it can easily be attached to the refrigerator, also it can be hung on the hook. ✓digital kitchen thermometers has a precision sensor inside recognizes food temp accurately,which control error range ±18℉this is a very excellent performance grill thermometers print meat temperature chart on the backsideyou can refer to it easily and handily when bbq or cooking. ✓Guaranteewe have 100% hassle free money back guarantee immediate replacement or refund without return required. ✓With this meat thermometer you can get the temperature at any time with the backlight buttonthere a large lcd backlit display shows temp readout clearly and instantly. AMIR Digital Meat Thermometer, Waterproof Instant Read Cooking Thermometer Electronic Food Thermometer with Probe Calibration for Kitchen, BBQ, Poultry, Grill, Fast & Auto On/ Off [Battery Included] AMIR Digital Meat Thermometer, Waterproof Instant Read Cooking Thermometer Electronic Food Thermometer with Probe Calibration for Kitchen, BBQ, Poultry, Grill, Fast & Auto On/ Off [Battery Included] - Better accuracy & calibration the instant read thermometer includes the high precision temperature sensor, accurate to ±1°f (between -4°f to 392°f), ensures you can grill meat to your perfect doneness knowing it won’t be under cooked or burnt what’s more, you can calibrate it when it’s not accurate. Hold button & auto on/off before withdrawing probe, push “hold” the digital bbq thermometer will hold the temperature reading until pressed again internal collapsible folding tapered probe with auto on and off perfect for meat, liquid, food, candy tempering in kitchen and outdoor cooking. Super fast readout amir meat thermometer will get food temperature out within 3-4 seconds with an easy to read electronic lcd display, giving you accurate temperature results in seconds no need to wait for a while perfect for outdoor cooking, bbq, meat, candy, coffee, milk, bath water temperature and so on. Built-in magnet & backlight magnetic attachment & hanging hole provide much more choices for the kitchen thermometer to be carried or stored white backlight offers a soft reading background please feel free to contact us if you are not satisfied with it we provide 100% money back and one year guarantee. Heat chart & ip65 waterproof the unique wave design to better hold the cooking thermometer when you use it and you can quickly check the ideal temperature for your food by the heat chart in the box the waterproof level highs up to ip65 the back of the product can withstand splash water no more worried about cleaning problems. #TopProducts

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/23-best-kitchen-thermometers-2019

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bigtomo · 4 months ago

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football but he has that one kickass back tattoo that john wick's got cuz im JEALOUS and i want to get it so bad #godblessss

BARBEQUE CHICKEN ALERT! BARBEQUE CHICKEN ALERT!!!

#football (oc)#the general

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jayankles · 8 years ago

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Not J2

Pairing: Dean x Plus size!Reader → Dean x Bailey[Me :)] - Platonic

Word Count: 3525

Warnings: Mentions of blood and gore, Language.

A/N – for @mrswhozeewhatsis #Not An April Fool’s Joke Challenge. Everyone received the same prompt - Your doorbell rings, and when you answer it, Sam and Dean Winchester are standing there in all of their denim-wrapped glory. Sam gives you the most effective set of puppy eyes you’ve ever seen and says, “[insert your name here], thank God you’re home. We need you.” They are not actually Jared and Jensen sent by your friend as an April Fool’s joke, they really are Sam and Dean Winchester, and they really need your help to save their hunt. - I kinda changed it a little tiny bit but it still makes sense. It was so hard to write in the first person.

Adjusting the thick black rimmed glasses on my face, I rubbed my forehead and closed my eyes, not wanting to continue the torture that was studying. Papers were scattered across the dining room table, some information going straight to my long term memory with enough rehearsal, but some of the others were completely missing the mark, becoming a tangled for me not to recall it at all.

A knock at my door sounded, I breathed out a sigh of relief, able to take my burning eyes off of my laptop screen. I opened my door and smiled seeing my best friend, Jessica. Her green floral bag slung over her shoulder, she smiled as she shook a bag of chocolate in my face.

‘God, I love you.’ I said as I took the bag from her grasp and hugged her.

‘Only when I give you food, you whore.’

I strolled past the full table, nodding with a lopsided smile.

‘Too right.’ I walked to my cupboard pulling out three serving bowls, then ambled over to the pantry, a packet of barbeque beef hula hoops and a few tubes of fruit pastels. ‘You think this will hold us over?’

When she didn’t answer me, I turned around, finding her taking selfies and being her natural, vain self. I rolled my eyes as she tilted her head to the side, getting a better angle, pushing the fringe of her bob cut brunette hair, off her face.

‘Are you done feeling yourself? I’m going to need some of your smartness right about now.’

‘Bailey, you know the answer, you just don’t think you do.’

‘Most of the stuff, I’m relatively okay at, at best. But anything biopsychology related is a big no no. Then there’s research methods and approaches. Fucking hate approaches. Stress convieniently stresses me out, aggression I can relate to and I like relationships even though I’ve never been in one. My memory is like a fish...shall I go on?’

Jess laughed, the sound passing through her red coated lips. ‘Nah, I think I got the message.’

‘Proper food’s almost done. My mom’s out and my sister’s are at my grandpa’s. Just you and me, the house to ourselves. Chicken and mash, you good with that?’ I asked as I poured the contents of the food bags out into the bowls.

‘Bibble, I so cool with that. You’re cooking and I get free food.’ She rolled her eyes, taking a seat up at the table. I punched her shoulder lightly before speaking.

‘Good because whether or not you like it or not, I would have rammed it down your throat, you had no other choice in the matter.’ I smiled sweetly.

Twenty minutes after Jess had arrived, the chicken was ready to be served. I had purposely cooked too much chicken for two people. If I’m being honest with you I told her it was for lunch for a few days in the week but I knew that after she left in the morning I would devour the rest of that poor chicken. I rubbed my plump stomach just thinking about it. Fucking skinny bitches. I love her really.

We ate our dinner relatively quickly, needing to retain and learn as much information as possible.

‘EWT...who studied it and what was their procedure?’ Jess asked, reading from her flashcards as I loaded the dishwasher with our empty plates.

‘Uh, that was Loftus, right?’ when she nodded, I continued, ‘it was a lab study of 45 particpants that were split into five groups. They watched a video of a car crash. Each group was given a verb in the misleading question.’

‘What were the verbs?’ She inquired taunting me as she popped a handful of hula hoops in her mouth, then reached for the fruit pastels.

‘Hit, bumped, smashed, contacted and… shit. It began with a “c” right?’

‘Yeah, come on, you know this, Bibble. Gimme another word for hit.’

‘Consti- nope, that has nothing to do with Psych. Lin’ll kill me.’

‘Dude another word for intersected!’

‘Oh god, I do this in maths...oh wait. Collided! Fuck yeah, bitch got it.’

I started to wiggle my shoulders in a little happy dance, Jess joining in quickly after.

‘Look at you knowing shit, but you ain’t done. What was the speed of the cars in the study that the groups gave, and give me supporting studies or AO2 points.’

‘Hit; 32, and smashed was...41 ish?’

‘Actually it was 31.8 and 40.8 but you got the verbs right.’

‘Do you have to be so pedantic?’

‘Duh,’ she winked, ‘supporting studies, go.’

Just as I was about to answer the knocker at my door alerted me of someone’s presence.

‘Be a doll and get that for me.’

‘Uh huh.’

‘Thanks. Love ya.’ I smiled.

‘I know,’

I scoffed, ‘rude.’

When Jess went to the door, I busied myself, flicking the kettle on for another cup of tea, and tiding the table, straightening a few papers before taking my laptop and plugging it in before it died.

‘Uh Bailey.’ Jess’ voice sounded through the hallway a little shaky. I made my way down there to see who was at my door. My breath escaped me as I saw Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki standing there, in their jeans, flannels and jackets. They looked as if they just walked off of the set of Supernatural still in character.

‘Hi.’

‘Hey.’ they spoke one after the other.

‘Holy shit, you guys are tall...and hot. Damn.’

Jensen looked a bit cocky like he knew exactly how hot he was. When you look like that, though, could anyone blame him.

I turned to Jess, ‘did you do this? You got Jensen and Jared here?’

‘Um no, and a little scared and horny at the same time.’ She whispered.

‘No kiddo. No Jensen and Jared here. Just Sam and Dean Winchester. But Bailey, we need your help.’ “Sam” said.

‘Oh my god. This is a prank, right? Sam and Dean can’t be real, they’re played by Jensen and Jared. This is the Frech Mistake all over again.’

‘Excuse me, what?’ Jared, no Sam, questioned. I didn’t even know what was going on anymore.

‘Sorry, come on in. Can I get you anything? Tea? Coffee? We can talk about it if I get some tea in me.’

The men walked over the threshold and into my kitchen. I was freaking out and not Jensen but Dean had to make it worse and open his big, stupid, beautiful mouth.

‘Coffee’s perfect, thanks sweetheart.’ His deep voice was making my knees weak, I know cliché, but it was true the bastard just oozed sex appeal. It was wrong for me to fantasize about him, but anyone with eyes knew my pain. The twenty one year age gap didn’t make it better either.

‘What about you Sam? Can I get you anything? And how do you take it’ The last part I directed towards Dean.

‘Black, two sugars.’ I nodded my acknowledgement.

‘Do you have a bottle of water by chance?’

‘Sure do, moose.’

Jess raised an eyebrow at me and I just explained that Moose was Sam’s nickname on the show. She followed me around like a lost puppy as I frantically pulled out a bottle of water from my fridge and gave it to Jessica to give to Sam, while I finished my tea and Dean fucking Winchester’s coffee.

‘So lemme get this straight. You’re really Sam and Dean. And you need my help of all people. I got one question. Why me? I’m nobody, I have no talents where it counts. I can’t- no I don’t run, I can’t fight. I’ve gone through so much shit with my dad’s controlling and possessive behaviour. My mom’s nickname for me is “my little goldfish.” All I’m good at is eating and watching twelve seasons Supernatural in three months. So I ask you again, why me?’

Jess heard the quiver in my voice as I put myself down and talked about my family.

Sam was the one that spoke, ‘Bailey, you are so much more than that. You think that we would be here if you weren’t needed, if you weren’t strong enough, if you weren’t good enough?’ He scrambled from his seat and sat next to me, wrapping a large arm around my shoulder. ‘Apparently, this monster is right up your alley.’

‘Yeah, that’s something I want to hear, a monster made for me to take down. That’s great Sam, just great.’ I sassed as I again adjusted my glasses, ripping them off my face and rubbing my tear stained, red cheeks before putting them back on.

‘Bailey, Garth talks about you and your “mad Disney skills.” We need you on this one.’ Dean interjected.

‘Garth? How can Garth know of me? I don’t even exist in your freaking universe, I barely exist in this universe.’

‘Obviously, he’s heard of you, otherwise we wouldn’t be here.’ I was completely stunned, from what I had deduced from the prior discussion, people were dying because they didn’t know enough about Disney. I was freaking talented at something.

‘What do you need me to do?’ I was determined to be good at something and this was it.

The brothers looked at each other, telepathically speaking, if I was honest with myself I didn’t know whether I was impressed or spooked out.

‘You have to be the bait, answer the questions, then the monster dies itself. It should foam at the mouth and then vanish into thin air. It’s body can’t control itself when its prey gets all the questions right.’ Sam explained, his hand waving around, wildly gesturing in the air.

‘And what if I don’t? I become the bait, get the answers wrong. I die then it moves onto someone else to kill?’

Jess huffed and shook me. ‘You can’t think like that, you’re always pumping out unnecessary Disney information. I know you can do this Bibble. You need to do this and you will not die!’

I changed from my pyjamas into a pair of sweats and an old t-shirt. If I did die I’d rather save my clothes. On the bright side, if I did die, I wouldn’t have to worry about the stress that was hanging over my head to do well in my exams at the end of the college year.

‘I don’t even know what this monster is.’ I whisper shouted as Sam and Dean walked on either side of me into the warehouse, of course it had to be an old, abandoned warehouse. Why couldn’t it be a nicely decorated mansion. I’d be happy to die there. Gosh, I am such a drama queen.

Dean knew what was running through my mind, also my heavy breathing was a give away. He stops and grabs my face in his large callous hands. God this feels good. ‘Alright, sweetheart. You go in there, you answer those questions to the best of your ability and kill that son of a bitch. If we think things are about to go south, we come here guns blazing and we save your ass for as long as we can.’ His hands drop and he nods at me.

‘Great pep talk, thanks Dean. Okay but all jokes aside, you and your brother really make a difference; in any world you are in. You truly are my hero, Dean Winchester.’ Sam coughed. ‘You’re up there too but you’ve ruined my moment so let’s go kill this son of a bitch.’

‘That’s my girl.’ Dean grinned before he nodded to his brother, ‘she’s ready.’

‘Wait, one more thing, actually two. If I don’t make it, tell Jess to tell my family that I love them and second thing. Can I get a hug from the infamous Winchesters?’

‘Sure thing.’ I embraced both the brothers in a side hug each, sandwiched between them before I let go, leaving my fate in the monsters hands.

‘Ten cuts, ten facts. The wounds will heal one by one if you answer the questions correctly.’

‘What! Wait a minute, why are you slicing me up? Can’t you just tie me to a chair?’

‘More suffering on your part. You’ll be free but unable to go anywhere until you answer all the questions, but if you don’t answer them, well, my poor child, I kill you. You die a slow death, so much so that you will beg me to stab a knife into your chest just to stop the pain.’ His voice was sinister as he continued to tell me the types of torture that he would use. Apparently, I wasn’t worth killing straight away and I don’t know whether to be flattered or scared shitless; always the latter.

‘Can we just start so I can kill your ass?’ I huffed as I sat on the floor, playing with a loose thread on my sweatpants. Might as well get comfortable, right?

‘Very well. Let’s begin.’ He flicked his wrist, pain serged through my body as wounds scattered across my limbs and stomach, crimson blood already seeping through my clothes. ‘Who voiced Belle in the original 1991 Beauty in the Beast?’

‘Paige O’Hara.’ I felt the smallest of the wounds close up, no doubt that I gave the correct answer.

‘Which two female villains were voiced by the same person?’

‘Maleficent and Lady Tremaine.’ Another wound healed.

‘Who was WALL-E named after?’

‘Walter Elias Disney.’ Another.

‘Who voiced Scar?’

‘Jeremy Irons’

‘Character with the least lines?’

‘You’d think it would be Sleeping Beauty but it’s Dumbo with no lines at all.

‘What’s so special about the Frozen characters; Sven, Hans, Anna and Kristoff?’

‘Frozen was based off of The Snow Queen written by Hans Christian Anderson rearrange the names. Hans, Kristoff, Anna, Sven – sounds an awful lot like Hans Christian Anderson.’

‘The Beatles were supposed to voice characters in a movie, which characters in which movie was it?’

‘The...it was the – um – it was The Jungle Book. They were supposed to be the vultures.’

‘There’s a Disney theory revolving around Anna, Elsa, Rapunzel, Ariel and Tarzan. What is it?’

‘Anna and Elsa are cousins with Rapunzel through their mothers, they are sisters. When Anna and Elsa’s parent’s go on the ship for two weeks they are supposedly going to Flynn and Rapunzel’s wedding but the thunder strikes, the parents don’t die, they’re washed up on the island and give birth to Tarzan. As for Ariel, the ship she looks around for human thingimabobs, the ship belongs to Anna and Elsa’s parents.’

The more questions that were thrown at me the more pain from the contuisions followed as he continued. I’m not a big fan of pain but then again who was? I couldn’t think straight. I clutched my sides as I got to the last two questions, these last lacerations giving me the most amount of discomfort but I had to do this. I knew the answers and I couldn’t put myself down any longer, not if more people would die after my mistake.

I felt light headed, the ground shaking as I went from the sitting position to curled up in the fetal position. A scream through my throat as he asked the next set of questions

‘Name King Triton’s seven daughters.’

‘Arista, Attina, Adella, Alana, Aquata, Ariel’ These were getting harder and harder, it took me a while to remember all of them and it was my favourite movie, I couldn’t remember the last one until it finally hit me. ‘Andrina.’

If I thought that the pain couldn’t get any worse, I was wrong. The penultimate would healed only for me to feel the transference of pain in my right side.

‘Should’ve worn red, dammit. Fuck I feel like I should’ve studied. Alright, last question, come on, Walt. Hit me with it.’

He asked the final question and my heart dropped. ‘Mary Poppins says that this word is a word to say when you don’t know what to say. How do you say it backwards?’

‘Shit,’ “Walt” smiled. ‘Just give me a second to figure this out. Supercali-Supercalifra-supe-’ I pause for a second, the pain still evident and lingering on my side before I look into his muddy brown eyes and smirked. ‘Docious-ali-expi-istic-fragi-cali-rupus. Suck on that you son of a bitch.’ I breathed. And just as the brothers explained, the monster foamed at the mouth, its sternum started to glow before he exploded, some of its gut landing on my face.

‘Great, just what I needed,’ I whispered before shouting out to the brothers that it was over and if they had a tissue or something to wipe my gut covered face with. I collapsed even further into the floor, the pain a little numb before disappearing completely.

Sweat was forming on my face, combining itself with the guts, before it dribbled down my neck. All my wounds were healed and all I could do was lie there in a daze, waiting for the brothers to come through the door. Sam and Dean came through the door, along with Jess.

‘See Bibble, you didn’t die. Good job you watch all those Disney movies, huh?’ When she came into the light and saw your face, she didn’t hold back her comments. ‘Ew, you look like shit, even more than usual.’

‘Thanks for that, just totally saved your ass and you’re giving my shit.’

‘You know I love you.’

She hugged me despite my disgusting state, ‘yeah, yeah.’

Sam laughed at the banter between Jess and I while Dean pulled out a black bandana from his back pocket and handed it to me.

‘Thanks, how many times you had to do that?’

The older Winchester smirked, ‘too many. Let’s just say that it’s enough to own at least ten of them.’

‘Oh one question. How do I get the blood out?’

The drive back in the impala was a dream come true for me. I was with my best friend, in the backseat of the Winchester’s baby.

When we reached my home, the Winchesters got out first. Sam and Dean respectively opening the doors for Jess and I, walking us to my front door.

‘How do you guys go this on a daily basis? I gotta give you guys credit, you live a crazy life.’ Jess was impressed by the brothers, and they hadn’t even done anything today but she soon realised that the episodes that I made her watch, they endured so much pain physically and emotionally. The brothers smiled again and shared a look. Jess whispered, ‘ do they do that all the time?’ I nodded. ‘Damn.’

‘We ever need you again, we’ll give you a call. And if you ever need us,’ Sam grabbed a card from his jacket pocket, handing it to me. ‘Anytime.’

‘Got it.’ I wrapped my arms around his waist and thanked him once more.

Jess went into the house after she said goodbye to the Winchesters, and Sam made his way over to the impala, leaving Dean and I alone.

‘You’re such a Disnerd!’

I punched his shoulder, ‘shut up, I saved...well, myself and future vics and aren’t you the one that’s always referencing Star Wars or anything pop culture.’

‘No, maybe, shut up.’

‘Mmm. That’s what I thought.’ Raising my eyebrows and smirking at him. ‘You heading back to the bunker?’

‘Yeah, ‘bout a three days drive.’

I tsked at Dean, asking him to follow me into the kitchen. ‘That’s what I was afraid of. Good job I’m a fat ass who cooked too much food.’

I pulled out the two containers; one with the chicken and the other with the mash. ‘For the road. Should hold you over for a while, better than gas station food right?’

‘Jeez, kid. I’m glad we found you.’

‘Eh. Gives me a chance to see you guys again. You gotta bring back the containers though otherwise my mom will go ballistic.’ I giggled as he fell into a whole body laughter, his back swinging as he lent back. ‘I’m not even joking.’

‘Got any jerky while you’re at it.’

I knew it was a joke but as I thought about it, I recalled something. ‘Actually, I do. I totally forgot about that. I tried it but didn’t like it.’ I made my way to the pantry and pulled out the packages, handing them to him, walking to the front door.

‘God, kid. You’re better than Sam.’

‘Hold that thought because before you ask, no I do not have any pie. Not a fan.’

He dramatically gasped. ‘How dare you! I should kill you for commit such a crime.’

‘Just means more pie for you, dumbass.’ I pushed his back, shoving him out the door, arms laden with goodies. ‘Alright, come’ere, tough guy.’

I embraced him, when he pulled back, he kissed my temple. We said our final goodbyes and he set off, the familiar creek of Baby’s doors sound as Dean got into his beloved Chevrolet. The brothers both waved before they drove away, heading off to save the world from the monsters that supposedly didn’t exist. But I knew differently.

Wanna Be Tagged?

Buy Me a Coffee?

Dean Tags: @thorne93 @becaamm @you-know-whodoesthat-crazypeople @jotink78 @love-kittykat21 @jensen-jarpad @hymnofthevalkyries @marvelbase001 @kurosaki224-new-blog @supernatural-jackles @cyrilconnelly @purgatoan @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @iwantthedean @goody2shoessmut @ruprecht0420 @mrswhozeewhatsis @feelmyroarrrr @redlipstickandplaid @mogaruke @anotherhunter-blog @sometimes-iwritee @caplanbuckybarnes @pureawesomeness001 @mizzezm @jpadjackles @jesspfly @1amluke @skybinx-blog @aubzylynn @balthazars-muse @deansbaekaz2y5 @plaidstiel-wormstache @lilasiannerd @thewayward-winchester

Tagging: @winchesterenthusiast @avasmommy224 @kas-not-cas @frickfracklesackles @daydreamingintheimpala @dancingalone21 @kittenofdoomage @bringmesomepie56 @katnharper @jalove-wecallhimdean @ravengirl94 @deanssweetheart23 @impalaimagining @riversong-sam @grace-for-sale @sleepywinchester

#not an april fool's joke challenge #dean x reader #dean x plus size!reader #dean x bailey #dean x me #supernatural #supernatural one shot #supernatural oneshot #spn family #not j2 #this was so much fun #prev. buckysmetallicstump #jayankles #jayankles writes #bailey writes

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krogerconews · 7 years ago

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It's not too late to save on groceries for 4th of July parties!

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magic5ball · 5 years ago

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Nature Trail to Hell Arc II: Watt Outta Hell (8)

Chapter 8: A Dik-Dik Screws us Over

If there’s one thing you need to know about the WEEB life, it’s that it doesn’t last.

The day things came tumbling down, F-Bomb and I were just sittin’ in front of the T.V. watching reruns of F-Bomb’s personal favorite series, Sailor Moon high on WEEB (we were using F-Bomb’s favorite method: eating it straight from a bowl covered in milk). As for Sailor Moon (F-Bomb’s pillow, that is), she was sitting propped up on the bed so she could look at the T.V., too. Of course, F-Bomb had insisted that he didn’t like Sailor Moon that much and was only doing it for his girl’s sake, but I dunno. I’d get embarrassed watching myself get beat up and bailed out last minute by a hot guy in a suit for the hundredth time.

Now, when we did these things, I should remind the audience we always watched with subtitles. The first reason was it delivered a more authentic experience that wasn’t dumbed down by an idiot who wouldn’t know a donut from a rice ball if either got lodged in his throat. The second reason was F-Bomb would always, always, always start ranting about his personal problems to Sailor Moon and me. And on that particular day, the topic was how everyone was being an ungrateful jerk to Sailor mini-Moon.

“Like, everyone says ‘Oh, she’s so annoying! Oh, she’s so mean!’ But I know the real reason they all hate her: it’s ‘cause she’s short! She’s small, and clueless, and scared, so they think they can pick on her!”

At times like this, Moon and I would just focus on the screen and roll our eyes. Maybe add in an “Uh-huh.” To look like we were listening. Frankly, I just liked Sailor Mini Moon ‘cause she was cute, but F-Bomb? He always, and I mean always had to go into a five paragraph essay about this stuff.

“And maybe if those noobs were paying attention, they’d realize that she might just be lonely ‘cause she’s been sent back in time with a bunch of weirdos she barely knows, struggling to find her place in the world, while they keep putting her down just ‘cause she’s a kid!”

There was an awkward silence in the room as F-Bomb took several seconds of deep breaths.

“Anyways, what do you think, Moon?”

Silence.

“Moon!?”

Again, nothing. And not just Moon’s usual silence, either. This was deep silence. The kind that eats up all the noise in a room.

F-Bomb paused the DVD and we turned around. Sailor Moon was gone.

For the first time, I saw F-Bomb on the verge of tears. His whole body trembled with shock.

“OhPorecelainGodOhPorecelainGodOhPorecelainGodOhPorecelainGod…”

Thinking fast, I brightened the dim lights. The good news was we found her, resting on her side in a corner of the room. The bad news was she was trapped in the diabolically adorable hooves of none other than Weena.

F-Bomb slowly pulled his machine gun out from under the bed; pointed it directly at Weena. “PUT. MY GIRL. THE FORK. DOWN.”

Weena, not giving a crap, used her hind leg to scratch behind her ear. It was the most adorable freakin’ thing I’d ever laid eyes on. But like most adorable things in the underworld, Weena had a dark side. Mere seconds later the furry abomination was ripping the corner of Sailor Moon with her tiny widdle teeth, pulling out the soft clouds of cotton that made up Moon’s life force. It took all my strength not to hurl. F-Bomb wasn’t as lucky. Before he could pull the trigger on his gun, he was coughing his WEEB up all over the floor, leaving a sickly rainbow puddle at his feet. If anybody was going to fix this mess, it would have to be me. Granted, my mind was whirring a million miles a minute, mostly through stupid anime references, but gosh darn it, I had to do something before Sailor Moon became Weena’s latest chew toy. My legs began trembling, like they usually do when I’m nervous. I reached for my machine gun- only for my eyes make contact with Weena’s. The moment I stared into those, dark, sunken, adorable orbs I found myself unable to pull the trigger. My eyes darted, searching for something slightly less lethal. This turned out to be a very shiny rock resting on F-Bomb’s bookshelf with all his anime figurines. Grabbing it, I flung it near Weena, just enough to scare her away. Yet somehow, someway, I hit my mark square on the leg, leaving a thin red line running down it. At first I cheered, having finally done something right. Then the cheering stopped as I remembered that whenever I thought I did anything right, it usually meant I did something horribly wrong. And who better to affirm my crippling doubts that recently awakened F-Bomb!

“Y-you forkin’ idiot…” he grumbled. “What have you done?!”

Despite Weena’s wound looking like nothing worse than a paper cut (though to be fair, I once spent an entire day in the school nurse’s office because of one) she really put on a show. She’d dramatically dragged her body away from Sailor Moon, leaving only the faintest trail of blood behind, finally resting with her legs in the air and her tongue rolling out of her mouth. My triumph was now ice cold dread. I’d killed Weena! The spirit that kept the entire gang alive! The closest thing the boss had to a girlfriend! If A-Hole found out about this, getting caught smoking WEEB would be the least of my worries. But there was one thing I could do. Swallowing my last shred of pride, I prepared to deliver the breath of life to Weena’s lips. Only for F-Bomb to grab my ankle.

“Oh, for fork’s sake, ya moron. Weena ain’t dead!”

“She’s not?!” Relief shot through me as I realized my first kiss might not have to be a Dik-Dik after all.

“For starters, you barely scratched the girl. Second, and listen close, this is real important.” I leaned in close, eager to hear what wisdom my friend had to dispense. “WE’RE IN HELL, YOU FORKIN’ MORON! WE JUST REGENERATE WHEN WE DIE! HOW DO YOU NOT REMEMBER THIS?!” Several deep breaths later, he continued, his mind slowly sobering up from the WEEB. “A-and to top it all of, of all the weapons on my shelf, you had to use my mint-condition, authentic CashMoney Stone! Do you know what forkin’ happens to anyone hit by that thing?!”

“Uh… something?” Specifically, Weena had dropped her façade and now faced us, lightning bolts flashing in her eyes. Literally. Left sparks on the floor and everything.

F-Bomb sighed. “Just look at it this way: we’re not getting Moon back without a fight!”

The second he finished, Weena charged us, a trail of thunderbolts in her wake. F-Bomb and I tried to dodge, but the little raptor wasn’t able to get his tail out of the way fast enough. He let out a screech of pain as his feathers stood up end on end before crumpling on the ground like a thanksgiving turkey. I tried to run, only to realize my hair was standing on end. There would be no escaping the judgement of the Dik-Dik. Satisfied she’d fried us into chicken dinner, Weena went right on back to pulling the stuffing out of Sailor Moon. You should have seen it. Man, it was GRIZZLY! Of course, even being reduced to a barbeque turkey wasn’t enough to stop the ‘Bomb, especially when his waifu was on the line.

“Watt” he croaked, “if there was ever a forking time I wanted you to do me a genuine solid and not fork everything up, now is the forking time! Now, if I’m right (and you know I forking am), Weena was pokevolved into Weenachu. She can cover anything around her in static electricity, and it gets stronger the closer you are to her body!”

“So we just moisterize our skin?” I asked, remembering something my science teacher taught me.

“Is that what our forkin’ schools are teaching kids these frokin’ days? No wonder American education has gone down the forkin’ tubes! No, ya forkin’ dingbutt! Weren’t ya payin’ attention when I told you about Pokémon? Electric types are weak ta grass types! And I have the most powerful kinda grass in the world right under my bed! While I’m going ta get it, I need you ta get the largest piece of plant matter I own.”

An audible gasp escaped my mouth, almost enough to alert Weena. “Y-you mean, we have to sacrifice our secret WEEB stash?! But I-”

“No, you forking moron! I mean my Naruto Omnibus. Like Hell I’m giving up WEEB!”

The Naruto Omnibus. An epic saga consisting of every Naruto chapter ever published (including spin off series)! It was wider than I was tall and consisted of more pages than the complete works of Shakespeare, Tolkien, and Dr. Seuss combined. As I crept down the shelf, I wondered why Weena wasn’t doing everything. Didn’t take long to find out why, though, ‘cause the closer I inched to the sacred tome, the closer I got to Weena, the more every single hair on my body stood on end, tingling with electrical power, reminding me all too much of the time I crawled up a slide. One bad move, and I could be sparked out of existence. And through this suffering, I could only watch as Weena tore the stuffing out of Sailor Woon and sleep in the cottony aftermath. After what felt like an hour, I finally made it to my destination: the giant omnibus that took up an entire shelf worth of space. So of course then was when I realized I couldn’t carry the thing in my wildest dreams! When I tried to signal F-Bomb about this, he just gave a thumb (though it was more like a finger) up and tossed his secret weapon out from under the bed: a single floret of giga-broccoli. Weena sniffed it tepidly, then, doubting it was a threat swallowed it whole. Keep in mind the little Dik-Dik was a vegetarian, so her head didn’t exactly explode, but based on the way her pupils expanded, it was definitely having some kind of effect on her.

F-Bomb gave me a middle finger from under the bed. It was time to act.

With all the strength I could muster I took that omnibus and slammed it right on top of Weenna. A loud thud, like thunder, shook the room as the tome hit its’ target squashing her flatter than a pancake on Jupiter. When F-Bomb and I finally removed the tome, all that remained was a pink stain that smelled like cotton candy and baby kittens. To the last (until she regenerated, at least), Weena had been absolutely adorable. What wasn’t adorable was the loud sound of footsteps coming from the entrance tunnel.

“Hey, guys, I was wondering if either of you had se- OHMYPORECELAINGODWHATDIDYOUDOTOMYWEENA???!!!”

“Get the fork off our case, boss.” Muttered F-Bomb “It ain’t her. Just Turdsy here spilled his strawberry milk while was was learnin’ to vivisect caribou!” I had to hand it to F-Bomb, when he wasn’t being a curse spouting, animu hoarding spazz, he could really hold his own under pressure.

A-Hole sniffed the air with his undeceiveable Deinono nose.

“You smell that, you forkin’ turds? That’s definitely baby kittens and smiles. You guys can’t forkin’ fool me!” For a split second, I saw an expression that looked jarringly out of place on A-Hole. The rest of the gang, if you ever meet them, will deny it ever happened, but I know what I saw, and what I saw was…

A-Hole crying, a single tear sliding down his hideous, scaly face. “Now how am I supposed to attract the babes?!”

“Oh, for fork’s sake, you forkin’ baby! We’re in forkin’ Hell! She’ll probably forkin’ regenerate in a few days and show up somewhere random like she always forkin’ does!” cried F-Bomb, mustering up one final insult before our inevitable doom. Or destroying any chance A-Hole might have mercy on us, depending on your point of view.

To which A-Hole cried “It’s not the same after regeneration!”

As for me, I stared at the pink splatter on the floor, trying to imagine my life was flashing before my eyes for a good reason and not because A-Hole was gonna give it to us. Sailor Moon still sat in the corner, stuffing pulled out, injured but alive. And just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse (something I really need to stop doing) A-Hole sniffed the air.

“Wait a second, is that…”

F-Bomb, at last, broke. “I-I dunno what the fork you’re talkin’ about! Just take us to our punishment already! N-nothing to hide anymore, no siree!”

Too late. By the time F-Bomb had finished his sentence, our verdict had been laid down by A-Hole, our private judge, jury, and executioner.

One look. Just one look at the stuff was all he needed to know.

All he did was point a single finger-claw at us; the rage in the room palpable “Come to my office.” He beckoned.

#My writing #Nature Trail To Hell #velociraptor #dik-dik #sailor moon #deinonychus

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healthwealthbridge · 6 years ago

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Darjeeling is a favorite destination.I love traveling to the hills. But I don’t like taking long road trips, in parts of the country with poor roadside washrooms. It’s a horror. That’s why any trip more than three hours on the road makes me worried.

This time of the year we often visit Mandarmani, but our favorite resort disappointed us on the last trip and we gave it a miss this time. A long vacation was not possible. Traveling from Malda always adds extra days on the road and I wanted more time to unclutter the brain.

Blossoms Eco tourism :Chota Mangwa

We decided to go off the beaten track and asked friends for recommendations. Our neighbor suggested a boutique property, which they had visited with family a few months before. After seeing their holiday pictures we decided to investigate.

Problem 1 Lack of social proof of the hotel property.It was not a typical Darjeeling hotel, but more of a detour in the Darjeeling hills. Trip advisor listing was sketchy with no fresh reviews. That always worried me. The properties own website was basic. But the pictures looked promising.

Darjeeling hotel at Chota Mangwa

Problem 2 No train tickets were available, Road trip meant a total seven hours journey. But when choices are limited you must take the road. The name of the place was pretty, Chota Mangwa part of Blossom ecotourism.

Why did we want to visit?

As a family, we believe in supporting eco-friendly businesses. The Darjeeling Blossom Ecotourism property was doing just that. The state of the Queen of hills is pathetic. There is poor sewage, dirty roads, crowded pavements in the once pristine hills. If we don’t take steps to preserve nature now, there will be no future left.

Darjeeling Hotel: How to Reach Blossoms Eco-tourism Hotel at Chota Mangwa

By Air: Fly to Bagdogra and drive to Chota Mangwa.

By rail to New Jalpaiguri Railway Station. By road to Choto Mangwa

From Champasari by road: Total time 3hours approx

Last 30 minutes road is challenging for lack of more accurate positive words. You must ask the hotel for a pickup as the terrain needs an experienced driver who knows the road and a TATA sumo.

What will you find at Darjeeling Blossom ecotourism complex?

It’s a pretty complex with multiple small cottages some with a view of Kanchenjungha and others with a view of the green valley. Either way, it’s delightfully green fresh and pollution free. Beautifully manicured bushes and plenty of flowers. There are short trails to explore. They pluck fresh oranges for you to have in winters.

Blossoms Ecotourism:Chota Mangwa hotel Bedroom at New cottage 1

Food The meals are fixed and homestyle.But the limitations are overcome by the freshness and deliciousness of the food. We ate Plain rice masur daal, jhuri also bhaja( crisply fried potato) and chicken curry for lunch on the first day. And a sarson ka saag (mustard greens) cooked the Nepali way. It’s blanched and sauteed with paanch phoron(5 spice blend), turmeric and salt. Breakfast and lunch ended with huge amounts of oranges to devour sitting in the sunny garden. What we loved. were the limitless freshly plucked Darjeeling oranges and cups of fragrant Darjeeling chai(tea).

Staff who made the stay a pleasure

Rajib

Namrata

Mita

Sabika

Prabha

What can you do at Chota Mangwa?

Not really an activity, but you must laze.

Meditate

Daydream

Stare at the mountains

Read

Write

Play badminton with a risk of shuttlecock deciding to get lost in the hills.

In the evenings, you can ask for barbeque and a bonfire to relax and unwind.

What we avoided?

Doing the touristy things like visiting mall toytrain, Ghoom, Batasia Tiger Hill because the road to and from the hotel is really difficult and is dangerous at times. If it’s your first time at Darjeeling visit Cedar Inn for the most comfortable stay. You must do the tourist stuff at Darjeeling at least once.

What we didn’t miss

Noise

Pollution

Wifi

What we missed

A working geizer.It’s really cold at 2degree celsius and lower, so hot water is a must. Though they provided hot water in buckets, it was inadequate.

Colder weather and small kids there may be a problem. They have an inverter,s solar power, and a generator, but the geizer never gave us warm water. They sent hot water to our rooms in buckets. It gets awkward asking for it. But 2 degrees needs warm water

Warmer blankets

Room heaters

Did we survive?

Yes, we did. It was a three-day trip and hence not a problem.

Darjeeling weather in December

Temperature ranges from 2 degrees to 9-degree Celsius and you need plenty of warm clothes, if you are visiting from the plains. The days are sunny and it gets very cold after sunset.There is always a chance of snowfall in December.

What you must carry?

Woolen sweaters,

Warm inners

Coat

Woolen gloves, socks.

Hot water bag

Extra blanket for kids if possible.

Can you see the Famous Kanchenjunga peaks in December?

Yes, you can. It’s during the cold weather the majestic Kanchenjunga and even the famousNathula range is seen.

Healthwealthbridge rating: 3/5

Love the ambiance.

Love the landscaping.

Love the food.

Love the smiling service.

Service was always with a smile.

USP: Ecotourism is important to help us preserve nature and still enjoy it.

Healthwealthbridge Recommends

Government help to develop infrastructure.

Improved Solar power setup to handle the rush.

Geizers which work.Because when it’s really cold there are some things you must have hot water for example. If they want to make a profit, in the long run, this one will need attention

Traveler Alert:

The road is still being cut from the mountain and you must reach by daylight. This is very important In two instances during travel to offbeat places in Darjeeling we were not told the state of the road by the hotel managers. When tourists ask you whether its safe to travel with a child you must be honest.

[bctt tweet=��The road up is always difficult and the journey here is worth it.#Healthwealthbridge” username=”misra_amrita”]

How to Enjoy Ecotourism At Darjeeling on a budget:Chota Mangwa(Blossom’s Ecotourism) Darjeeling is a favorite destination.I love traveling to the hills. But I don't like taking long road trips, in parts of the country with poor roadside washrooms.

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jackieisgran · 7 years ago

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March 2018

The first of March, I went to NC to visit mother for a weekend. We had a good time sleeping and eating. The weather was not conducive to taking her out to eat so I prepared all the meals. She eats well but it needs to be on her schedule.

When I got back I had a week at home by myself. I went to SK’s Soccer game which her to school one day and pick her up at early dismissal. That is a lot to do on one day. Breakfast, drive to school, go home, and then go back to school at noon to pick her up. The Daddy was out of town so I was helping out so The Mom could go to work.

Daylight saving time and losing an hour of sleep after 4 days of ACC tournament games that were played past my bedtime took a toll on me. I was not adjusting well to the change.

Nice thing was that Bud was home for a little over a week. But Friday and Saturday were spent in NC at a funeral for his friend Johnny Lindley. It was a quick trip but he was glad he went. On Monday I went to the funeral home to a visitation for my friend and former teaching colleague . It was nice to see so many of my friends at the funeral home . Sad to say that it had been a long time since I had see them, some them was at the funeral home some time before.

Tuesday we did a lot of work around the house. This year we hired a couple to put out our pine straw. It looked really good and we were not tired. All we did was to write a check. They were quite reasonable. Larry nor I would have put it out for the price we paid them. We then went to do grocery shopping and decided to eat out before we shopped. I said we did not want to shop on an empty stomach. It was Taco Tuesday and I had the fish tacos and Bud had the shrimp tacos. We did grocery shopping on a full stomach. We still spent a lot of money at the Kroger though. We bought pies for friends for $3.14.

Bud had heard from his friend John from Phoenix that he was doing a consulting job in Florence S.C. and was going to fly into Charlotte. Bud suggested that we could meet him for a meal on Thursday or Friday. Bud says we don’t do spontaneous things anymore. The last time we were spontaneous we went to Birmingham to meet another of his friends who was from Kansas. That was a really bad weather day. I suppose that Birmingham and Charlotte are closer that Phoenix and Kansas.

Wednesday was Pi Day and I had some $3.14 pies to deliver before Gym and one to do after the gym class. I went to school in my gym clothes with a nice long sweater over it so I was not much of an embarrassment. Then I went to Gym class and worked very hard at completing the WOD. It is getting harder to keep up with the young whippersnappers who have joined the class. I went home showered and washed and dried my hair. I told Bud I would pack a small bag when I got back from my final pie delivery to go to Gaffney when I got back. John was finished early and was going to try to get out on an earlier flight. I threw an outfit in a bad and a small toiletry bag which did not include my toothbrush, I found out later. We drove to Gaffney which was not a bad drive. We ate dinner at Daddy Joe’s Beach Club and Barbeque. It was a really good meal. It had been awhile since we had eaten there.

On Thursday morning we drove to Charlotte to eat breakfast with John at The Flying Buscuit. It was a good breakfast and a very nice visit with John. We had a long breakfast and then we parted ways. Right next to the Flying Biscuit, was Blackhawk Hardware. It was a wonderful hardware store. Ace Hardware in Daytona is my favorite hardware store and this one beat it by a lot. It was so well organized, clean and filled with such good stuff. We spent a chunk of money there because of the unique items they carried. Checking our I found that they were an Ace hardware but it was a High End Ace Store, I might remember what they called it but High End describes it best. The people were so nice and customer service was not an endangered species there. They all spoke to you and ask us if we needed help and we had some great conversations with several of the employees.

After leaving there we headed home. We stopped in Gaffney for gas and shopping at the rug store and Ralph Lauren Outlet. We found Bud a couple of the knit polo bear shirts which were on clearance and I had a 30% off coupon. They were out of oxfords and said they were gone almost as soon as they came in. Our next stop was Commerce Outlet Mall to check for Bear shirts there. We only got a couple of children’s t-shirts for SK. They were low on Bear shirts as well.

Our next stop was at The Brake Pad for chicken wings and salad for dinner. They have the best chicken wings. Then we headed home. I have gotten out of cooking a lot of dinners this week.

Friday was a gym day and we worked on clear out our clutter. It is a slow project but we are making some headway. It may need a dumpster before we are finished.

I have gone through our closets and let go of things I did not wear this winter. Our forty bags in 40 days for lent is helping but we need to do it for a year. Saturday was a day we just stayed around the house and worked on covering all the porch furniture in plastic just in time for the pollen. Sunday Larry flew to Dallas to teach a class.

Sunday evening I went to Aunt Amanda’s house for dinner. Our friend Corryn was in Atlanta from Germany. She had her soon to be husband with her. He was delightful. Amanda and CJ were great host to several of Corryn’s friends from the area. We miss her but she is so happy living in Germany. She and Jens are getting married in Germany in June in a castle. The paperwork is a real problem for a German to marry an American in Germany. So they are flying to Las Vegas next weekend to get married in Denny’s. Sound like fun. Then it will be legal and they can forget the massive amount of paperwork in Germany and still have a wedding in June in the castle with their families.

Monday was laundry and gym day and some cleaning. I kept hearing about the bad weather in Alabama. I went to bed early but my phone alerted me that I was under a tornado warning. I turned to TV on and the cone was headed my way. I went to basement and watch TV from there and as it got closer. It was very windy and rainy but it hit about 5 miles from here. They had very bad damage to their homes. I pray that they can get back into their homes quickly but some look bad. It was still thundering and lightening when I went back to bed.

Tuesday I took my very dirty car to a car wash. They did a great job. I drove across the street to Publix and there was a yellow tinge to my black car. Oh well, I can now see out of the windshield. When I finished my grocery shopping, my car was yellower. I tired to use the leaf blower to blow it off when I got home but it blew off and attached itself in another area. I will just love a yellow car for a few weeks. I had thought all the rain and the wind we have had the past week would have lessened our pollen but that is not the case.

On the 28 I went to Roswell to get hair repair. After hair repair we headed to Ponce City Market., a market development in the old Sears Building. Using Waze App, we traveled through many neighborhoods that were being revitalized. Also on the way was Trader Joe’s, so we decided to shop there for awhile. When we got to Ponce City Market it was nice to walk around the shops. We found a restaurant with good food and decided we were ready to head home.

On Good Friday, Bud took SK, and The Mama and The Daddy to the airport for a trip to visit SK’s grandparents in Canada. The Aunt and the Cousins went on the trip as well. This trip means we will celebrate 2 Easters this year. When looking at my calendar, I saw that April1 is Easter and April 8 is Orthodox Easter so we will celebrate both this year.

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goodbutnotgreathouse · 8 years ago

Text

Prepping for Paint

This was a crazy weekend. Friday morning we closed (hooray!) and we celebrated with some nice shampaggin and barbeque from the fried chicken joint in Saint Paul, Revival. Man alive was it ever delicious!

Then came the one thing that was stressing me out more than anything else — testing for lead. Our house was built in 1919 and nobody really know about how totally nasty lead paint is. I mean, like really bad. SCIENCE ALERT I minored in neuroscience, and we covered lead and why it's such a dangerous substance in my neurobiology class. There are a number of ions involved in neurotransmissions — the big ones are sodium (Na+), potassium (K+) and calcium (Ca+), which are used to send electrical signals to other neurons. Well, to these cells, lead looks just like Ca+ and they happily absorb it, where it starts to do all sorts of damage to the cells. It will really screw you up, so I was terrified we'd find it in our walls.

And yet! Nothing to be found at all. We used about 40 of these really great 3M lead swabs and found nothing! I checked all the walls in the main floor, the trim, and the varnish, and nothing! (The little bit of red you see on the wall there isn't a positive lead test — that's blood from my finger) I was thrilled, and immediately started scraping out the at-least-30-year-old adhesive stuck to the bottom shelf of the built-in. It was sticky and digusting and horrible.

Right as I finished, it occurred to me that I hadn't spent any time checking for lead in the kitchen. And unfortunately, the news there wasn't as good.

Shoot! It turns out the trim in the kitchen, which had been painted over and over and over, had some lead in it. So now we have to track down someone who abates it. I was bummed, but tried to look on the bright side: no lead anywhere else in our century-old house, which meant we could start tearing into these walls.

But first — upstairs. A fire in '85 cause the entire upstairs to be remodeled, and while they did it right and correctly... they also did it as cheaply as possible. We're talking 2" oak trim, small windows, carpet, and popcorn ceilings. They're inoffensive enough, but they darken ceilings and they're not period-appropriate. They had to go.

Since we know we're repainting, removing the trim, and tearing out all the carpet, we weren't super diligant about taping the plastic up to the walls. We just did it a few inches above the floor, and thank god we did it. Because holy god, what an enormous mess. I read a lot about how messy these things are to take down but I was not prepared for the sheer amount of dust and garbage we wound up creating. It was everywhere.

We did the 'ol spray'n'scrape method, which worked pretty well once we realized that our sprayer wasn't spraying. We were probably about five minutes away from calling in a professional before I realized that water wasn't coming out of it and we were basically dryscraping. Once we got the water up there it started coming down in sheets. We knocked out all three bedrooms in about three hours, getting progressively faster as we went along. Then we went home and had beer and ice cream.

Saturday I aso started cleaning the trim. The previous paint had accumulated all over the wood, and there was a horrendous caulking job that was far from square and accurate — at some points, there was about half an inch of the sill missing and painted over! So I spent a couple hours scraping out all the garbage from next to the trim and cleaning it up so we had nice tight corners everywhere. We used these amazing Goof-Off wipes which, after some scrubbing, took off basically all the old paint left us with clean wood. That, coupled with the amount of crap we pulled out from behind and next to the trim, led to windows that actually look like they sit on top of the wall instead of being sucked into it!

Because I am bad at this, I have no pictures of this process, but I do have this one that shows how much crap was hiding the wood on just one window:

We went from this:

to this:

It's not perfect, but it's a lot better. We did this on all the windows, and most turned out better than this guy, which was by far in the worst shape out of any of them.

My folks came over on Saturday to help out around the place: my mom spackled the numerous holes in the walls, my dad installed new locks, and we just got a lot of the stuff done we needed to do before painting could occur. Right as they were about to leave, I showed my dad our new thermostat and he got excited about trying it out. So he popped off the old thermostat and the horrendous plate it was sitting on, and lo and behold, it was like a time capsule of the house:

We think the light green is the original color of the house, which was later repainted that slightly darker green. The brown goop everywhere is from our lead test, which (re-)confirmed that there is NO LEAD PAINT in these walls! I'm not sure what thermostat technology was like in 1920, but it seems to me that they added something, then changed it out sometime in the 50s for that BIG circular one. The Nest is three inches in diameter, and that big green circle is probably five or six. It must have been there for a while, too, since the white plaster went around it at some point. Then someone installed that faceplate that you can see the outline of, and have been painting over it ever since. No faceplates for us! I patched the whole thing with some joint compound Saturday night, then hit it with spackle Sunday morning. Once it dried I sanded the whole thing and gave it a test coat of paint, and now you'd never guess it was there.

My mom is a huge gardener, and Sunday afternoon she turned our fenced-in weed zone (not as cool as it sounds #blazeit) into an actual, honest-to-goodness vegetable garden! She was out there a long time, and since she's an organic gardener, she pulled all the weeds by hand. I'm really impressed. She planted carrots in the sun (the patch in back) and lettuce, potatoes, and spinach in the front. T and I are happy, and our guinea pigs are going to be very happy.

Sunday and Monday were a bunch of odd jobs to get ready for painting, like sanding down spackle, cleaning up holes around trim, caulking the trim, and taping everything out. I also put a big hole in the wall of the sun room:

There was an old outlet cover there, one of the kind that you screw on when you remove the outlet. When I popped it off (after removing several coats of paint) I discovered that not only was there never any outlet there, there had never been any kind of electrical work there at all! In fact, the electrical box was just nailed in to the studs. I was horrified but not surprised — that's par for the course with this place.

That weird stone-looking material at the back of the hole? I poked it and as far as I can tell, it seems to be the old insulation! There's foam around the hole and behind the wall, but I'm guessing they put this box in first and sprayed around it, leaving the old stuff in place. According to the plans, it's something called Linofelt, about which I can find next to nothing except this cool logo:

Anyway, since the lath was missing, I had nothing to adhere the plaster to. I considered buying some and putting it in there, but it's such a small space with just those two little studs on either side, I figured I could probably only squeeze two in there without making the hole a lot bigger. Plus, that seemed like a lot of work for a four-inch hole. Instead, I got some of that drywall mesh, screwed it into the studs, and then put plaster patch on top of that. I kept adding layers until it was about a quarter inch from flush with the surrounding wall, and once it dries (today, I guess), I'll joint on top of it and put some texture on so it matches the surrounding wall. Then it's just a matter of sanding it down and boom! You'll never know it was there.

With everything patched, caulked, sanded, and taped, it was finally time to start painting on Monday. Here's what it looked like after our first coat Monday at 9:30:

You see the crappy splotchy paint on the big wall to the left? That's where I started. T is secretly a paint master, so I quickly moved to cutting in the edges while she kicked ass with the roller. We only had the time (and energy) to do one coat on one side of the living room, but it already looks so much better and brighter in there. We took the Sweethome's advice and went with Benny Moore in Simply White. Tonight we'll finish the first coat, and tomorrow we start the second. Hopefully we can get the whole ground floor done by the weekend!

—A

#home #renovation #painting

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