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bbina · 27 days ago

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alone together ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 . . . stay

── taking comfort in the thought that you are together in aloneness through late night talks, heartfelt confessions, and a genuine connection. with your shared experience of recent heartbreaks, you wonder if getting together would be all worth it. in which you find solace in each other's company, that you are alone together.

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꩜ notes .ᐟ whooping 4.2k !! i really like this chapter to celebrate forty fucking chapters . i hope everyone enjoys!!!

꩜ taglist .ᐟ @onlywonb @rosesfortaro @starwonb1n @wonychu @totheseok @dolloie @hyunjinsnumberonefun @binluvsu @onlyhyunjin @annswwa @wonbinsvlle @hakkkuu @ilovejungwonandhaechan @artstaeh @lecheugo @odxrilove @bunni @saranghoeforanton @nujeskz @nakam00t @kyusqult @nctsshoes2 @revehosh @s9nwoo @daegale @palchokitty @dutifullyannoyingfox @oshakyao @koryutte @b-riize @meowbini @peterm4rker @winuvs @i03jae @rsatoru @enhacolor @dalliesque @sweetiejaeyun @dearestjake @cupidslovearrows @sasfransisco @kkumistars @sngj08 @taroddori @nshmurarki @ennycutie @sa3ha @koeuh @astro-doll-the-star @amouriu

wonbin hates the club

don't get him wrong, he likes the concept of having a nightlife and all that but something about clubbing just irks him one way or another. maybe it's because of that one horrible experience he had when he got dragged into going clubbing thanks to shotaro, after receiving the news that he, wonbin, got ghosted once again, but in all honesty who really knows

wonbin hates the feeling of bodies pressing against each other in a tight space. he hates the feeling of not hearing people properly over the loud music on those bass boosted speakers, he hates that you can't even hold a decent conversation at the club. he hates getting drinks spilled all over him when people can't walk due to the amount of people dancing around him

he just hates it

but here he was, in the club where you shared your location, at god knows what time, looking for you

wonbin doesn't know why he felt the need to do all this. he could've easily asked seunghan instead to come get your ass when you called him but nope. he got up from the comfort of his warm bed in his cold room, threw on a jacket and went straight to you. ignoring shotaro’s curious stare when he walked passed him in the living room in a hurry

on the way to the club, he can't help but think about how your conversation went on the phone. you called him out of the blue amidst your drunk updates, talking about how some of giselle's other guy friends came and ordered even more drinks and how you had a blast for the first time in a long time

"can you pick me up i want to go home" you whine through the phone. there were some ruckus in the background and wonbin can only make out some words such as "another shot", "let's dance"

wonbin removes the phone from his ear and stares at the screen, making sure that it was actually you who was calling and not some random person with wide eyes

was this just some drunk call or were you actually dead serious?

"wonbin" you drag out his name, voice going an octave higher than normal. "come get me" you demand, slurring your words

wonbin snaps back to reality when he realizes that you were in fact, dead serious

"stay where you are. i'm on my way"

wonbin sucks in a deep breath when he scans the place, looking around, trying to look for you amidst the crowds. he sighs in relief when he finally spots you

wonbin makes his way through the sea of people as he approaches the lounge area where he finds you slumped against the plush couch while some of your friends were trying to take care of you by making you sit up properly. wonbin couldn't help but laugh a little when he watches you swat your friend's hand away cause you were starting to doze off

wonbin approaches your table and taps your friend on their shoulder, it was karina

"oh my!" karina reacts, a hand flying to her mouth. she didn't expect that you'd call wonbin out of all people to come pick you up. she expected that you called seunghan

wonbin sheepishly smiles and throws a peace sign before he motions his hand towards you

"i'm here to pick y/n up? she called me" he says, unsure of what to say really. in wonbin's defense, what else was there to say?

karina nods and moves out of the way so wonbin could come and haul your ass out of the club

"she had way too much to drink but she had fun so" karina notes, watching the way wonbin was lightly tapping your shoulder to wake you up

you click your tongue in annoyance when you feel someone tapping you awake again. you peek an eye open but your vision was blurry

"y/n wake up. i'm here. let's go" the voice you know all too well speaks

you don't know if it was the alcohol running in your system but you know that voice anywhere. your eyes flutter open and the first thing you see was a guy's face

it was wonbin

"wonbin?" you squint your eyes, trying to sit properly but your head was spinning that it was hard to do. your head feels weighted that you feel your head falling back but a hand stops it from doing so

"yeah it's me" wonbin affirms, holding your head from falling back before he fixes your position so you'd lean back properly on the cushions behind you

when you realize it was wonbin, your face lights up. you didn’t expect that he’d actually come get you

"you actually came" you giggled, clearly in a drunken state

"well, you called" wonbin smiles lazily, he knows you don't know what you're saying right now. he then takes a mental note of your current state and assesses the situation. first of all you were drunk out of your fucking ass to even handle yourself, second you were wearing something that would make it hard for him to move you properly

suddenly there were loud cheers coming to the table. wonbin looks around and sees giselle, the birthday celebrant, and some other people he doesn't know coming to the table

giselle sees him and her eyes almost pop out of her sockets

"holy shit is that wonbin?" she shrills, looking at karina for confirmation who nods her head yes and covers the side of her mouth to say something to giselle

wonbin smiles awkwardly at the birthday celebrant and even greeted her

"happy birthday by the way" wonbin greets, before he diverts his attention back to you who's suddenly wide awake

"thank you! here take a shot!" giselle chirps, pouring some liquor into the little shot glass she's been carrying around the club, handing it to people

wonbin was about to refuse but suddenly you stood up and grabbed the shot glass from giselle

"i'll take it!" you cheer in delight until wonbin manages to stop you from drinking it by prying the shot glass off your hands

"no you won't. you're drunk already" he lightly scolds you before taking the shot himself. wonbin grimaces a little at the taste. he hands the shot glass back to giselle, who was seemingly smiling widely at the sight in front of her

her eyes dart between you and wonbin before she ushers herself out of the conversation, dragging whoever was beside her to parade around the club again. the victims being jaemin, jeno and karina

you plop down back on the seats, pouting while crossing your arms, mumbling about how wonbin didn't let you drink

wonbin sits next to you as he watches you look upset beside him. you weren't even looking at him. he couldn't tell if he should laugh cause you clearly won’t remember all this the next day and the fact that he might have another thing to hold over your head again (last time it was the drunk call)

"let's go home now?" wonbin asks softly, leaning his head a bit closer to you, who only scoffs in response

"nuh uh" you roll your eyes

wonbin sits back in surprise. did you really just say nuh uh?

"what do you mean "nuh uh"?" wonbin quotes, "i thought you called me here cause you wanted to go home?" wonbin bites back a laugh. talking to drunk you in person almost sounds like talking to a child

"you didn't let me drink" you huffed, whining a little, finally turning around to look at him in the eye

wonbin couldn't help but laugh at the look on your face. he couldn’t believe that you actually got upset that he didn't let you take a shot. like a kid who just got denied off of candy with the way your lower lip was jutted out with your pout

"when we get you home, you could have all the shots you want. how about that?" wonbin suggests, tucking some hair away from your face. he was trying to fool you into heading home cause god forbid how much longer can he stand being in the club. he already took a sacrificial shot for you so the least you could do is to cooperate with him so two could go home even if it meant into fooling you into doing it

he sees the way you suddenly perk up at the sound of his bargain. he smiles in triumph when he watches you nod your head excitedly

"do you mean it?" you ask with your eyes glistening with anticipation

wonbin smiles and nods. "all the drinks you want. on me"

"okay!" you chirp, "so when are we going?"

wonbin checks the time on his phone before ordering an uber to come get you guys at the club

"we can leave now if you want" wonbin says, tucking his phone in the pocket of his jeans before looking back at you who's now leaned back on the cushions again

"let's just tell karina and giselle we're leaving" you yawned, feeling drowsly all of a sudden

wonbin nods, standing up from the couch. he stretches his limbs before holding his hand out for you to take. you gladly accept his hand as he helps you stand and stabilize yourself by putting his hand on the small of your back before scurrying out of the table with you in tow

you were walking around the dance floor looking for karina or giselle to bid them goodbye. wonbin sees karina talking to someone by the bar. he tugs your hand and points over to the direction where karina was. you nod your head as you two walk over to her

"rina!" you yelled over the music. karina stops talking to the person in front of her which was jeno, as she looks around for the person who called out her name. she then sees you and wonbin making your way towards her

"we're leaving. just wanted to let you know. if you see gigi tell her i went home and thank you for tonight" you ramble, hoping your voice was louder than the music. karina nods her head yes and tells the two of you to make it home safe and to text her if you've arrived

karina then bids you two farewell before she makes her way back to jeno, who was also waving goodbye at the two of you

with that, you and wonbin head out of the club, hand in hand

you two were now outside, waiting for his uber ride that he ordered a few moments ago. the air was cold and you weren’t exactly dressed according to the weather. you stood next to wonbin with your arms crossed to keep yourself warm while you two waited. just not too long ago you were feeling a little hot inside the cramped building but now that you were outside, you cursed yourself for only bringing a light cardigan

not only you were cold but you were slowly feeling like shit. you can feel your hair was sticking on your face, the way your heels were slowly killing you, almost everything was crashing down on you in this instant

wonbin watches the little car icon that was still on the way to where you guys were waiting in when he notices you shivering in his peripheral vision

without hesitation, he removes his jacket and drapes it on your shivering shoulders

before you could even say anything, the uber driver arrives. wonbin opens the car door and motions you to get in first. he makes sure that you don't bump your head against the car by putting his hand just above your head before he slides in next to you

"you good?" he asks, making sure you were okay

instead of answering him, you nod your head drowsily. the warmth of wearing his jacket making you sleepier by the minute. you can feel your eyelids grow heavier as you can barely make out the conversation between the uber driver and wonbin

the next thing you know you were out like a light next to wonbin

wonbin was busy having a conversation with the uber driver when he suddenly hears light snores coming from you. he turns his head to the side and there he sees the sight of you sleeping soundly wearing his jacket

he fights back a smile when he sees how snug you look wearing his jacket that was obviously bigger on you. wonbin then adjusts your head that you were now laying on his lap and not against the window

there's a sense of solace that he feels whenever he's with you. so much that he can't even directly describe what it actually feels but he knows what it is when he's with you

wonbin gently runs his fingers through your messy hair. he couldn't help but laugh at the thought of how you'd feel the next morning when the realization will dawn upon you that you called him to come get you at the club. that you had him to take care of your drunken state

it almost feels deja vu to wonbin that he was out here taking care of your drunken state. he finds it a little funny of a coincidence that it happened twice. the first time it happened was when you didn't even know who he was, and the second time being right now where you two have developed a deep connection through the constant late night talks and shared comfort in one another

it isn't much to say anything but he finds it funny that it happened twice

wonbin leans his head back, staring at the window. the city has always been quiet in times like this, just how he likes it. quiet enough that he can still hear his thoughts but loud enough to distract him from everything going on

he doesn't know why but he's silently hoping that this drive would take a little longer

. . . ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

"i'm tired" you complained, eyes still closed as you and wonbin stood outside your apartment building. you two just got dropped off by the uber driver courtesy of wonbin who ordered and paid for it now here you were, leaning on wonbin for total support.

you were now quite literally on your last legs. your feet are killing you with your heels and the fact that your head was pounding. all you wanted to do was just lay down on your bed and doze off

but of course, you still had to get inside your apartment, get unready, prepare yourself medicine and yada yada yada. just thinking about it while still under the influence just made you feel worse

"my feet hurt" you hissed, kicking off your heels on the street, startling wonbin at your sudden outburst

you were getting cranky by the minute. maybe this was all the drinks you had coming back to get your ass

"we're almost home. just a little more walking okay?" wonbin gently says, trying not to piss you off. who knew you become so cranky after a night out?

wonbin takes a deep breath, realizing the sticky situation he's in. he figures that you won't be cooperating anytime soon so he grabs your heels and wraps an arm around your waist so he could stabilize your posture as you two walk inside your apartment complex

it took a while for wonbin to basically haul your ass to your floor. you had no elevator in your building so that meant stairs. you were so close on giving up due to how exhausted you were that wonbin had to carry you on his back

"are we there yet" your words were slurring. the way you nuzzled your head on wonbin's neck, catching a whiff of his scent that smelled like a mix of vanilla and roses

"almost" wonbin huffs. not only he was carrying you, he was also carrying your purse and your heels with his free hand

you hum instead of answering. leaning your weight on wonbin. he was just so warm that you can’t get enough of it

“wonbin” you call out after a while. you don’t even know what floor you two are in but one thing for sure is that your unit was on the 9th floor

you're gonna owe him a lot for this

“yeah?” he answers, glancing back at you ever so slightly

he can feel shivers on his skin when he feels your lips accidentally brush against his exposed nape

“thanks for coming to get me” you say quietly

wonbin laughs, ignoring the feeling in his chest

“wouldn’t want you to call anyone else to be honest” he jokes. he’s still in disbelief that you called him out of people. “you owe me for this by the way”

you hum again, closing your eyes, just letting wonbin take you home

wonbin finally gets to your damn apartment unit. he crouches down so you could get off of his shoulders. you groggily get off his back to walk up to your door to input your password so you could get in

finally, home sweet home

you never wanted to just fall face first onto your covers

wonbin laughs at the way you were basically crawling your way to bed. your feet must've been so tired wearing those heels all night long. but then he realizes that you were wearing outside clothes

he puts your things down on the counter before he makes his way towards you, who was now laying peacefully on your bed

"get up. let's get unready first" he says, grabbing your arm, pulling you back up

you let out an irritated growl. snatching your arm back

"don't want to" you grunt, lying back down when wonbin stops you

"i just want you to be comfortable before you sleep. please?" he pleads, watching your face contort into something he can't decipher. although it looks like you were trying to glare at him

looks like he had some magic spell whenever he says please cause you just silently went along with what he said. you stood up, wobbling over to your bathroom so you could get unready

wonbin laughs at the way you were stumbling over yourself. tripping on your own feet trying to get to your bathroom with your eyes closed

he then watches you sit on the toilet lid. he waited for a few minutes in case you were just trying to compose yourself but you just sat there in silence. essentially he took out his phone out and took photos of your state. this was too good of an opportunity not to take pictures of you for future purposes (blackmail basically)

"y/n" wonbin calls, waiting for you to respond. when you don't say anything back, wonbin makes his way towards your bathroom

"are you seriously sleeping right now" wonbin laughs out loud. the way you were just sitting still with your eyes closed

"huh?" you blurt, trying to peek an eye open but no avail

wonbin couldn't stop laughing. the next time you plan on drinking all night, he'll make sure to remind you to think twice before doing so cause just look at you right now

"where are your makeup wipes?" wonbin asks, wiping a tear from his eye from laughing so much

it took you all the remaining energy you had in you left to even lift your hand to point where your skincare stuff was at. wonbin follows where your fingers were pointed at and opened your drawers looking for some makeup removers and the like

when he finds the packet, he takes one out and kneels to your level. he gently grabs your face and starts to wipe your makeup away in a gentle manner. just enough that your face would be deemed as clean so you wouldn't sleep with your makeup on

"are you done?" you murmured, still sitting on the toilet lid. wonbin pats your head, ruffling your already messy hair in the process

"yep. just brush your teeth and change then we're good" he says, getting up from his kneeling position off the ground, throwing away the wipes to the trash can

you begrudgingly get up from the toilet lid and pushed him out of the bathroom to change and brush your teeth

wonbin can't help but laugh a little. how this night turned out was beyond his expectations. he didn't expect that he'd actually take care of your drunk ass all night

while you were busy doing your thing, wonbin looks around your cabinets for some medication like painkillers or advil for tomorrow. he prepares them near your small fridge so you won't need to look for them first thing tomorrow with a pounding headache

after what seems like a while, you emerge out of the bathroom in your pajamas while still wearing his jacket, looking ready to sleep in the next day

wonbin watches you slowly make your way towards your bed. it was a good thing you left your ac on before you left hours ago because your apartment was freezing cold, just the way you like it

you didn't even bother to cover yourself with your blanket the way you just straight up plopped down on your bed face first. the cold pillows hitting your face immediately and almost knocked you out like a light

wonbin, who was still in your apartment, couldn’t help but smile again at the sight. you were finally comfortable enough that he wouldn’t have to worry about any other complaints besides the impending hangover you're surely going to have soon

he walks near your bed and covers you with your blanket, making sure you were comfortable and cozy. he waits for a moment, hearing your breathing go steady til he takes this a sign to leave

man, what a hell of a night has it been taking care of you

though your hand stops him from leaving just yet

"wait" you murmured, your hand circling around his wrist, making him turn to you

"yes?" wonbin hums, leaning down close to you in case you had any more requests

"stay" you mumbled, tugging his hand that he stumbles a bit

wonbin hesitates for a bit. you were obviously not in the proper state of mind and you were just saying shit. he's not sure if he should comply with your wishes or not cause when you wake up tomorrow there's gonna be a lot of questions like why were you in bed with him and that's the last thing he wants

"wonbin" you whine, tugging on his arm, “stay with me. please”

he really can't resist you, can he?

wonbin slowly slides in your bed next to you, thankfully there was still an ample amount of space between the two of you. he'll just stay til you really fall asleep just to avoid any awkwardness throughout the night

though that goes all out the window when you suddenly wrap your arms around wonbin and rested your head against his chest

"so warm" you comment, sighing in content

wonbin freezes and rethinks every decision he made tonight that led to this

what the actual fuck

"you're drunk, y/n.." wonbin mumbles, arms itching to wrap themselves around you, "you'll forget about this later in the morning.."

"what are you even saying? i'm saying you're just warm to be with" you drunkenly rant, raising your head a little to glare at him. “hold me” you huffed, snuggling closer to wonbin if it was even possible

wonbin is unsure with what to do with his hands. he feels like this is all so wrong but at the same time, it feels so right. thinking that it wouldn't be much of a problem later on (and you did basically grant him permission), he eventually wraps his arm around you too. fingers delicately tapping beats on your exposed shoulder, slowly lulling you to sleep

"wonbin.." you murmur against his chest. wonbin hums, indicating that he was listening and paying attention

"i'm so happy that i met you" you mumbled, "i never met.. anyone like you..”

wonbin chuckles, you were just sleep talking at this point but it did make him feel warm inside that you felt that way towards him. because if he was being honest, he felt the same too

it's silence after that. the only sound that could heard was your light snores. looks like you finally fell asleep

in wonbin's arms at that

wonbin takes this time to take a good look of your face up close. this was the second time you two are this up close with each other. something really did shift between the two of you ever since that kiss cause why the hell were you so comfortable with him like this ever since

he tucks your hair behind your ear again. fingers delicately tracing your face before he gently rubs his thumbs across the apples of your cheeks, smiling softly as he watches you sleep peacefully

"i'm happy to meet you too" he lightly chuckles, knowing you couldn’t hear him.

too tired to get up and cross the street to go back to his own place, he figured that it wouldn't be much of a problem to sleep over for the first time and you did tell him to stay after all

with his eyelids growing heavier by the minute, he drapes the blanket over the two of you before he dozes off to sleep with you in his arms

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rip-quizilla · 3 months ago

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Impossible to Hate You ~ Part 8

Pairing: Eddie Munson X fem!Reader

Summary: "We were friends for a long time... and then we weren't."

Word Count: 4.3 K

Divider was created by @hellfire--cult ❤️

New Years Eve, 1983

There was always so much noise at Granny’s house.

People were everywhere. In the kitchen, in the bedrooms, in the den, even outside in the cold. There was no escaping from the noise no matter where one went in this house.

So why, then, as you sat on Granny’s little gossip bench staring at her pale yellow phone, did you feel completely suffocated by its silence?

“Are you expecting a call?”

Startled, you looked up at your grandmother and answered, “Yes… maybe…” you looked down at your lap, feeling utterly childish as you tumbled through your sentence. “He didn’t say when he would call, exactly. Just said that he would.”

Granny watched you with understanding, nodding her head as if you were making complete sense and not ignoring what an entire week of silence from that phone must mean.

“Well dear,” Granny said softly, “the way I see it, you have two options.”

You listened intently, worrying the telephone cord between your fingers as you had been for who knew how long by now.

“-Ether you risk missing that call- which I’m sure any sorry soul who waits a week to call a girl as pretty as my granddaughter would understand- and spend some time with your family,” you didn’t miss the knowing smile she gave you or the raise of one near translucent gray eyebrow. “-or you can sit by the phone for the rest of your time here letting some boy take over your entire holiday.”

You cringed, looking back at the phone for one more longing second before smiling at your granny as you stood from the chair.

“Need any help in the kitchen, Gran?”

She grinned, hooking your arm with her own as the two of you made your way to the already crowded kitchen to find something to occupy your mind other than some boy.

However, you still chanced a look over your shoulder at the telephone before it disappeared from your sight. Eddie said he would call. It’s been a week, why hasn’t he called?

He said he would call.

Eddie was staring at the phone too.

He’d been staring at it ever since Robin had told him what happened with Alan. Been staring on Christmas Day, been staring every day after that, stared at it on New Years Eve when he wondered if he’d ever get to claim your New Year’s kiss one day. Fantasized, more like. He knew it wasn’t a possibility now.

He’d already made up his mind, and that was why he wouldn’t touch the phone.

For the best, he told himself. It’s for the best.

The radio silence continued for far longer than you’d thought it would.

Eddie knew when you were coming home- you’d told him that he could see you as soon as you got home the Friday after New Years’. He’d said the two of you could make up for the lost holiday time over the weekend before school began.

But there was no call from Eddie. And even though you knew he was in the wrong, there was a part of you that was laughing at yourself for being so naive that you’d expected this to actually happen. Dating Eddie Munson… who were you kidding? He didn’t even want you wearing his jacket around school; for a moment you had thought that he may feel the same way about you as you felt about him, but even if that were true he wasn’t about to let the whole of Hawkins know that. Now, you weren’t even worth a phone call.

You shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up.

These were the thoughts that plagued you as you crossed the frigid parking lot of Hawkins High on the first day of the spring semester. It felt strange to drive yourself to school again… it had been almost a year since you’d done that, since your usual ride was a 1971 Chevy Astro. You couldn’t help searching the lot for that very brown and yellow van, and weren’t sure if it was relief or disappointment you felt when it was nowhere to be seen.

You didn’t see him in Latin class. Or History. Or Pre-Cal. You were beginning to think he’d just cut school for the day when you walked into the cafeteria and saw him sitting at his normal spot, head of the table as always.

Your face started to get hot, palms sweating and heart racing- you thought about sitting at a different table since he obviously didn’t want to see you. Let yourself down easy, let the memory of him fade from your life, let him have his way.

But then he saw you.

For a split second, he looked as ghost-white as you felt. The next second, he was smiling and laughing at something one of the guys was saying.

As if you weren’t even there. As if the elephant- the mammoth- in the room wasn’t even there.

Maybe… maybe everything was fine? Maybe he had simply forgotten that he’d said he would call? What if you had remembered the conversation you’d had wrong, and it was you who was supposed to call him, and he was only avoiding you because he’d thought you were mad at him.

A thousand possibilities were running through your head as you made your way to the lunch table, setting your things down and sitting in your usual spot beside Eddie.

You received a couple of greetings from the guys, but not from him. That wasn’t good.

Your heart was racing; you must have done something, said something. There was some kind of misunderstanding, but you would work it out. You just had to extend an olive branch.

Nudging Eddie’s elbow with your own got his attention, but not how you’d wanted. Instead, he flinched away as if you’d burned him. Flinched. His eyes were wide, surprised and slightly skittish as he looked at you for the first time since you’d sat down.

Why is he so jumpy? You thought, What did I do?

“How- ahem,” your voice was surprisingly hoarse, and it dawned on you that you’d hardly spoken since you’d told your parents goodbye that morning. “-how was your break?”

He stared at you for a moment, blinked, then donned a mask of indifference as he turned his attention back to his meager lunch of pretzels and a Slim Jim and shrugged. “Good.”

His voice was light, airy. Noncommittal and monosyllabic. The tone of voice someone used when speaking to a person they’d rather not be speaking to. You’d heard that tone from him before, but never directed at you.

“You…” you stuttered the end of that word, struggling to make up your mind about which words would follow it. “...you said you would call, Eddie…”

If you’d thought his face was white before, you knew it was now. You noticed his chest heaving underneath his layers of jackets, and for a split second you wondered if maybe everything would be okay after all. Maybe you were just in your head, and this was all some big mistake, that everything was fine and you were just being dramatic.

“Yeah, I…” Eddie gulped, and suddenly he was indifferent again, aloof and uncaring. “...I was busy. Sorry.”

Nothing about this made sense. Not a single thing about this interaction made any damn sense. Eddie was never aloof with you. Never uncaring.

“You were busy?” You repeated, and the edge in your words must have been stronger than you’d intended because the conversations around you were starting to taper off into silence in favor of listening in on the quarrel at the head of their table.

Eddie narrowed his eyes on you, annoyed. “Yeah, I had a busy week, I already said I’m sorry.”

“So busy you didn’t have time for even one phone call?” you whispered, keeping your voice down. You were upset, but giving the boys a show wasn’t on your agenda. “Eddie, I… we… I had a good time before we left, I thought it…” you were feeling so many emotions right now, a cocktail of embarrassment, anger, frustration, everything but sureness of yourself was swirling in a cyclone behind your eyes, and Eddie saw all of it in only one glance. It’s why he looked away and searched desperately for something else to train his gaze on.

“...Eddie, I thought we-”

His eyes refused to meet your own, but his tone was biting when he interrupted your whispered plea with a bitter mumble. “It was one date, you’re acting like we’re married or something. Don’t be so dramatic about it.” Then he bit down on a pretzel, breaking it in half with a single crunch.

You felt like you’d been slapped across the face. “I…I- you…” What were you trying to say? What could you say? Nothing came to mind. You didn’t have words for what you were feeling, and your brain was already moving a mile a minute. You’d thought things would be different now, but not like this. Not worse. That one date hadn’t just made things weird, it had apparently caused irreparable damage to your friendship. It was too late to take anything back. You couldn’t go back to normal after this. You didn’t want normal after this. Not when you knew what what could have been felt like, and especially not now that you knew he wanted absolutely nothing to do with what could have been. Nothing to do with you.

The thoughts were swirling, and the cyclone was growing louder and more dangerous. Suddenly your eyesight was blurry, and something wet was falling down the slope of your cheek, and your heart felt as if it was clawing its way up your throat. So up you stood, snatching your unopened lunchbox from the table and crashing through the exit door. You didn’t care that it was freezing out and that you had nothing but your cable-knit red sweater for warmth, you ran anyway. You ran until you reached the black cherry tree, collapsing against its steady bark as you finally let the tears fall.

Your heart finally found freedom from your throat when a sob wrenched its way out of you, shaking your shoulders with a violent gasp. How did this happen? How had you gone from being completely and totally sure of where you stood with him one week, and weeping over him the next? You had whiplash, you felt like you were dreaming. This wasn’t your Eddie; he was acting like a different person, why? What had you done to upset him like this?

You heard footsteps crunch across the dry, dew-frozen grass behind you, and you didn’t need to look to see who it was. You also didn’t want this particular person to see your tears; they would only serve as proof that he was right about you being too dramatic. You stared daggers into the trunk of your tree and tried to sound as unfeeling as he had.

“I want to sit out here today.” you said, cursing the hiccup that escaped you in between sentences. “You can go back inside.”

Eddie just stood there, silently. He didn’t know what to say. This wasn’t in his nature- being hateful. Being mean. It killed him to do this, to know he was even capable of hurting you. Yet here he was, doing it anyway.

“Okay.” he mumbled, “If you’re sure.”

Every fiber of his being was fighting him. No rational part of him wanted to go along with this twisted plan that the darkest part of him had created- the side of him that knew deep down that he never deserved your friendship in the first place. The side of him that knew if he stayed on the path he’d been on until last week, you would get hurt again- people like Alan would make sure of it. He would drag you down, he would hold you back, and you would stand by him taking hit after hit for him all the while like the perfect angel you were.

Simply put, he hadn’t done a damn thing to deserve you, and you didn’t deserve the shit that came with having anything to do with Eddie Munson. So here he was- righting the balance.

He turned to walk away from you, leaving you shivering and sobbing in the cold, and just when he didn’t think he could feel like any more of an asshole, he heard your soft quavering voice from over his shoulder and his heart just about shattered.

“What did I do wrong, Eddie?”

He was glad his back was turned, or else you would have seen his expression crumple for a moment before he regained his composure.

“Isn’t it obvious?”

He had to make it hurt. He had to be brutal, he had to be heartless. If you thought there was a way to talk this out, you’d take it, and he’d be weak enough to let you. Then all of this would be for nothing.

He had to hurt you now; it was the only way he could make sure he never hurt you again.

“I mean, come on. You’ve had a crush on me from day one, if I’d wanted anything serious I would have acted on it before now.” Eddie was facing you now, but he couldn’t look at you. His eyes were staring at his Reeboks with such intensity, he wondered if he might burn a hole through his toes. “I only asked you out because I felt bad for you. You were so desperate for attention… I mean, we had some fun, yeah, but that was all it was. Girls like you are just too easy to be anything serious.”

He saw your head snap up out of his periphery, and despite his better judgment, he lifted his gaze to get a better look.

Your eyes were red and wild, tear stained cheeks grayish from your makeup and upper lip slick from what your sniffles couldn’t quite catch.

“Girls like me?” You repeated; he felt a chill run down his spine at the tone of your voice, and he knew it wasn’t due to the cold. It was low, eerily quiet and foreboding. He couldn’t help but feel like he may have gone too far, but it was too late to take it back now.

“Well since you’re an expert on girls like me, Eddie Munson, let me tell you a thing or two about boys like you.” The tears were still flowing down your face, but the look in your eyes was anything but sad. He’d seen that look on everyone important in his life but you up until now.

Disappointment.

“Boys like you,” you said, “are liars. Because the way I see it, either you’re lying to yourself and to me right now, or you’ve been lying to me every day since we met and you’ve finally decided to show your true colors.”

You hiccupped through a breath, stifling a sob as your composure threatened to crinkle in on itself.

“I can’t reconcile that the person I’ve known this whole time and the person you’re being right now are the same guy! I don’t know if you’ve always been this way and pretended you weren’t or if you’re lying right now for some reason that you aren’t telling me… But Eddie, you’re a liar either way.”

You saw right through him; he’d almost hoped that you would. He couldn’t do anything about it, though- he wouldn’t deny nor confirm, because if he spoke he might break. He just stood there, eyes lowered to the ground like a scolded child.

You marched toward him, and his heart felt as though he’d put it behind bars. He’d silenced it, shoved it in a cell and locked the door. Even when you were standing within arms reach, he couldn’t bear to look you in the eye. “I know when I’m not wanted, and I’m not going to fight for something that means so little to you that you’re willing to throw it away without even telling me why.”

You reached down to pick up the lunchbox you’d dropped during the onslaught of your sobbing, and caught his eye contact on the way back up. You held it menacingly and without question as to who held the authority to break it and who didn’t. “You want to let this lie? Fine. I’ll let it lie. It can lie right under a gravestone for all I care.” You shook your head slightly, face crumpling into bitter disappointment. “Bye.”

Then you walked right past him, and he did nothing.

He didn’t chase you. He didn’t argue, he didn’t fess up about how all of this is an act meant to convince you not to spend another minute associating yourself with the likes of him. He didn’t even say ‘bye’ back. He stared at the ground and prayed to whatever god was listening that it would swallow him whole.

It was surreal how quickly a routine could change when necessary.

One day, Eddie was an integral part of your life. He was the reason you were excited to go to school every day. He was the source and recipient of nearly every smile you gave.

The next day, he was gone. His presence in your life had disappeared into thin air, and while there was a part of you that had started out hoping that Eddie would come back to you with apologies and explanations, that part was never satisfied.

It was like the last year had never happened. Eddie hung out with his Hellfire friends and you hung out with Robin. You gravitated back into your old social circles and never overlapped.

You had explained everything to Robin immediately, reeling when she told you what she’d divulged to Eddie about the incident with Alan and wondering if somehow, that had something to do with Eddie’s sudden shift in behavior. But in the end, it didn’t matter- he’d dropped you this quickly, and no reason could justify that to you. You wanted nothing to do with someone who didn’t care enough to try harder to keep you.

Winter subsided to spring, and when the time came to think about college you set your sights on schools as far away as possible- Hawkins might have been your home, but there were so many pockets of your small town that reminded you of Eddie. The lake, Benny’s, the Starcourt mall… so many places were haunted by memories of him, preserved like flowers that had begun to mold because they hadn’t been pressed quite right.

You passed your exams in the spring easily. Despite your better judgment, you worried about Eddie doing the same without you to help him study, and that worry proved it wasn’t in vain when you heard down the grapevine that he had failed enough of his core classes that he wouldn’t be graduating with the rest of you. Funny, you thought, how you had spent so much time helping him figure out his learning style only for him to forget all of it the moment you were gone.

If you could have seen through Eddie’s eyes, however, you would have known that he remembered everything. Painfully so. He wished he could forget, that way he might not feel so guilty when deciding not to try anymore. At a certain point, graduating just didn’t feel like something he deserved anymore.

And graduation came and went without him. You moved out to New York for college at the end of the summer, and Eddie stayed in Hawkins. You remembered hearing a rumor that he planned on dropping out. You tried not to feel responsible.

You resolved to remember your friendship with Eddie Munson as a strong, but short lived connection. You told yourself that’s all it was ever meant to be- a powerful connection with an expiration date. With time, the pain would begin to numb and you would learn to forget about him.

All it would take was time.

~ 10 Years Later ~

“Okay, how about this- I take the monstera, but you get to keep all of the succulents.”

You sighed, keeping your new wireless telephone wedged between your shoulder and your ear as you worked your way through unloading the dishes from your dishwasher. It was a quaint, compact appliance designed to fit perfectly in one-butt-at-a-time kitchens such as the one in your New York City apartment.

“Kate,” you started, wondering if she was ever going to drop this or if you were going to have to force her to take all of the plants with her when she moved out. “You have always been the one that takes care of these damn plants. You know me- am I ever going to remember to water these things?”

Her voice was quiet for a moment before you heard her defeated “...No.”

“Correct.” you confirmed, nodding sagely as you lined thrifted mismatched water glasses into a cupboard. “Do you want a single one of your precious babies to die while in my care, Kate?”

“But maybe you’ll decide you want to take care of them because they make the apartment so pretty!”

“I will not! You know that I will not, and that is why you are taking all of the plants.”

You snorted when you heard her disgruntled sigh garbled through the phone. “Don’t you want at least one of them? They brighten up the place so much, and I’m sure your new roomie would appreciate the extra oxygen it would bring-”

“-Then he can bring his own plants.” you countered, drying off your hands after unloading the last dish.

“I still can’t believe I’m moving out…” Kate’s voice took on that nostalgic, mirror-glazed tone that you’d heard so many times this month already. It broke you down a bit- always did. You and Kate had lived in this little apartment together for the last five years. You’d seen each other through college graduations, new jobs, good dates, bad dates- and now, new living situations.

“Kate,” you warned, “if you were going to talk yourself out of moving, it would have been a lot more convenient before you signed a lease across town and I found a new roommate.” You let yourself fall into the worn out corduroy sofa under a window where your cat, Icarus, liked to perch on the sill and soak up the sun. You reached up to scratch between his ears absentmindedly. “He’s on his way here now, so it’ll be pretty awkward if I have to tell him to get lost.”

“You’re sure this guy isn’t some weirdo?” Kate sounded concerned, which was typical of her. While she may be two years younger than you, she still worried about you like a doting big sister. “You haven’t even met him, and he’s already moving in.”

“Well if he is,” you said, gazing at the door to what used to be Kate’s bedroom. “Then I just don’t resign the lease with him. He’s only subletting until the end of the summer anyway, so there’s nothing binding that’s keeping him here. And besides, he’s friends with one of Cathy’s brothers’ girlfriends.”

You could practically hear Kate rolling her eyes through the phone. “Right, he’s basically family at that point.”

A knock at the door caught your attention, Dun-dun-dudun-dun… dun-dun.

“Well he’s here now, so if you don’t hear from me by tonight you’ll know he’s an ax murderer.”

“Not funny!”

You chuckled, finding it very funny. “Love you!”

“Love you too. Seriously, call me tonight!”

You hung the phone up on its wall mount as you made your way to the door. You were curious who this mystery roommate was. When your coworker had heard you talking about how Kate was taking a job that would relocate her across town, she’d raved about this person who she’d met at a Christmas party back home who would be moving to New York and needed a place to stay. She went on and on about how he was the nicest guy, easygoing and down to earth- you’d initially wondered why Cathy wasn’t inviting him to move in with her before you remembered that she was married.

You plastered on a welcoming smile as you turned the knob of your front door and swung it open.

You saw the eyes first. They still looked the same, sweet chocolate brown eyes framed in lashes that a Covergirl would envy. You noticed traces of eyeliner around the edges- that was new- but the eyes were the same.

The hair… there was so much more of it now. It was longer, it was shinier… it fell over his shoulders in waves and matched the scruff that dusted his cheeks and jawline. You saw light glint off an earring somewhere in all that hair.

Your eyes zeroed in on the bats before you could focus on any of the other tattoos that now littered his arms. They were more faded now, patchy and fuzzed at the edges. Yours didn’t look too different- it looked pretty much the same, minus the bluish tint that his had taken on from too much sun exposure.

He dressed a little differently; seemed taller too- but it was him. There was no mistaking those eyes.

On one side of your doorway, you stood in complete and utter silence. On the other side, a ghost stood in equal silence with a suitcase in one hand, a beaten guitar case in the other, and a duffel bag slung over one shoulder.

The irony of it was funny, really. The person who had shut you out all those years ago, standing at your door, waiting to be let in.

It just had to be you, you thought bitterly, didn’t it, Eddie?

It had to be you.

Part 9

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