#As if we have a homoerotic anime rivalry

[get-shakespeared-nerd]

"f'rgive and f'rget" wrong! wend to hell

"forgive and forget" WRONG! go to hell

[cdyssey]

Agatha All Along (1.05) Reactions:

THESE CREEPY ASS ANIMAL WITCHES

“… because her own mother tried to have her executed.” Defending her ex-wife <3333

“Are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker?” KQKSKJDWIJEJS, never change, Jen

“When Agatha murdered her sister witches, she spared their young children.” Agatha has a noted/known soft spot for children.

LMAO, AGATHA RUNNING IN LIKE A BAT OUT OF HELL. “Whoooooa, the moral of the story, kids, is always finish what you started. Also, mercy is overrated.”

I fucking love her so much

“All right, everybody. Pack up your shit. Let’s go!”

Rio being the only one who agrees with Teen suggesting the broom thing.

There being no question that Agatha and Rio are going to exchange brooms. They just DO it. love that Agatha makes rio’s pretty as well

Lilia, criticizing Jen’s broom: “You could have done better.” KQOWOFSJS. All these catty ass witches.

love Teen and Alice’s friendship.😭

The witches flying during a Blood Moon, and they’re all so happy omfggggg. That’s my coven of mothers (and one teenage boy).

AGATHA LOOKING BACK AT RIOOOOOO AUGHSHSHHSHS

SLUMBER PARTY FITS OMGGGGGGG. 80s???? 90s???

I LOVE LILIA’S HAIR

AGATHA’S TRIAL ALREADY??? HELLO??? I thought they’d keep that in their pocket until later in the season.

“And who better than to commune with the dead than someone who’s put so many in the grave?” Rio says with a smirk. Work and play.

“Do not speak over each other.” / [All the witches start speaking over each other.] lmfao

Jen @ Mrs. Hart: “Hey, girl. Feeling better?” AKqoqodjwiowkwjs I would die for her actually

Alice holding Jen by the shoulders 🥹

KATHRYN’S MRS. HART IMPRESSION.

“BAKING CASSEROLES, LINKING IN TO CONSPIRACY THEORIES ON FACEBOOK, DRINKING BEFORE NOON”

AGATHA BEING AN ASSHOLE AOQOWKDJDJSJ. goddamn I love her

“She’s just scared.” Rio clocking Agatha’s shit so easily. When Agatha’s scared, she absolutely puts on a repulsive performance to hide that very fact.

The reluctance in Agatha’s voice when she has to do it for real this time. Hhhghhhhh

“D-E-A-T-H.” Cue Rio laughing.

Agatha being the first to let go out of fear aufhshhshhhhhhhhh

“I hated this the first time!” Lilia’s already seen this particular trial in her premonitions.

HHHHHHHGH, the coven immediately turning on Agatha

“I mean, or we could just slit her throat.” she really loves threatening her wife with knives. <3

“When people ask me why I don’t have female friends.” Lmao, it’s because you’re always in psychosexual homoerotic rivalries with them. Hope that helps, Agatha. <3

FUCKING AGATHA JUMPSCARE GODDAMN

Sweetheart, you okay?” LAOQOWKWJDJEIWIEE

AGATHAS FUCKING MOTHER

“Hey, Mom. It was nice having you in my body for a second there. I’ve never felt so close to you before.” Agatha sounds so young and childish here, and I think that’s exactly the point, both of Kathryn’s acting choices here and the setting of the trial. Agatha is being taken back to her teenage years in a sense where so much of trauma began

Rio, more angry than we’ve ever heard her before: “No, no way!”

“A minute ago, you were ready to slit her throat.” Bc it’s foreplay for Agathario, Jen. Keep up!!

“Yeah, well, her mother can’t have her.” FUCK YES

goddamn, this really is Regina and Cora mills all over again, down to the ghost possession story

“Mom?” The fragile way that Agatha says it.

“Why do you hate me still?”

“You were born evil. I ought to have killed you the moment you left my body” FUCK OFF. NO ONE IS BORN EVIL

Agatha reflexively starts to tear up and Rio looks down. And the rest of the coven sees what clearly made Agatha Harkness too

Agatha fucking BEGGING them not to leave her

“I can be good.” DIDN’T SHE SAY THIS WHEN THEY TRIED TO EXECUTE HER SHUT UP

SOBBING ALICE TRYING TO PROTECT HER. AGATHA DRAINING ALICE. I CAN’T NO NO NO WHAT

AGATHA’S FUCKING SON, CONFIRMING HE’S DEAD

MAMA! STOP!

SOBBING???????

ALICE FUCKING DEAD.

I CAN’T DO THIS

NO

AGATHA GOING TO ALICE IN SHOCK UUGGGHHGFFFFFGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGG AND TEEN REJECTING HER AND—

FUCK I CAN’T BELIEVE ALICE IS GONE GODDAMMIT. SHE JUST BROKE HER FAMILY CURSE FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Agatha alone, and she’s got a bit of Alice’s powers.

“I couldn’t… I couldn’t control it.” And Agatha swears she’s not lying to him. I think I believe her—that she currently can’t control her own ability kicking in when she’s blasted with powers and that what happened to Alice was an accident, but I equally think that she instinctively and automatically ENJOYS the sensation of the absorption/draining. Very much like a vampire or a succubus—when the power starts flowing, animal instinct takes over.

AGATHA SNICKERING. OH, SHE’S ABOUT TO READ HIM

IS KATHRYN HAHN THAT MUCH SHORTER THAN JOE LOCKE LMAO

“YOU’RE SO MUCH LIKE YOUR MOTHER” YES OMGGGGGG

IT’S BILLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY

AND SHE WALKS OFF CUNTILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Okay, but serious side note here. I think this particular confrontation is in conversation w/ Agatha pretending to be possessed by Mrs. Hart earlier in the episode. When she’s scared/vulnerable, she puts on a show. And the moment when Teen indexes that he doesn’t believe she’s telling the truth about her powers, she LEANS into the villainy. She digs her heels in. It’s protection. It’s control. It’s facade.

JEN AND LILIA THROWING HER INTO THE QUICKSAND. BILLY BLASTING THEM

HOLY FUCK

NOT THE BILLIE EILISH NEEDLE DROP OHBMY GOD?

WHY IS THE EPISODE OVER WHAT

AND WHERE DID RIO GO OOIUFHHSHSHS!!!!!!!!

[batsplat]

the anon who sent the biopic ask here. afsfdfhhjkk I did in fact sent it to get you to talk about the movie version of sete/vale rivalry! I am also the sete anon after all.

anyways.

the vale selling his would to curse sete stuff had me screaming bc you see…….a while ago there was this gif set going around where 2020 or 2021 valentino’s leathers are unzipped and you could see how concave his chest is. and my first thought upon seeing it was “haha it’s actually concave bc valentino made a deal w the demon and gave him his heart in order to become the god of motogp, and also to curse sete:)))”

love the casey stuff, I think if we get the minds that worked on revolutionary girl utena in on this they could make it work. mainly bc rgu had really great visuals, lots of surrealist stuff and all that while having a pretty low budget. (yes rgu is also very complex and deals with stuff like csa, escaping the cycles of abuse etc but we’re not getting into that.) so, in some far far away alternative universe that studio makes a casey stoner inspired animated film (with huge budged) and it a cult classic. alternatively, satoshi kon could have also worked some magic w that set up I know. lots of great imagery there.

dovi biopic could actually work, if we use his story to make into a movie about the man vs corporate machine, how futile that struggle is, disillusionment and ultimately choosing to walk away. so, actually it won’t be a dovi biopic in the sense most ppl think of what biopics are? it would end up more grim than general audiences realize bc the movie will show that in the end ducati succeeded and have won world titles etc and dovi was a cog in that machine, and had his imput being downplayed etc. but also like dovi has his family, his inner circle, his self of self to fall back onto and the audience is obviously ends up on his side so it’s not downright depressing. (I wrote this w a specific director in mind even afdgghjk)

w dani&jorge………ok I’m gonna sound insane for this but. we need to maybe fully fictionalize this. have original characters, who are totally not heavily inspired by jorge&dani *wink wink*. get pedro almodovar to direct or something. this movie is now about jorge-inspired-character dealing with his closeted homosexuality, his fraught relationship w his father….like I am in no way trying to suggest that real life jorge lorenzo might be gay here! but his story does land itself to these themes if you think about it. the rivalry is underlined by homoerotic tension the two characters cannot acknowledge (even to themselves) within the setting of competitive motorcycle racing. buttt after their retirement? they discover that there’s a life outside of it all and maybe mayyybe the movie implies they could get together or something.

also love the sepang 2015 movie framing but yeah it would be considered the worst racing movie of all time, like 5.4 out of 10 on imdb, tge director wouldn’t be able to make another feature film for another 10 years after that. but good news it gets some reappraisal and a small but dedicated cult following like 15 to 20 years later.

wow, did not mean to type all of this out actually! but I do want to say that your answers never disappoint and it’s always a good read. have a nice day!

(follow up to this post) omg pls I love long asks, I'm gonna not take this in order because I NEED to skip to the casey/valentino rgu vision because?? yes? casey is like... such a magical girl... (magical girl transformation into leathers, is this anything) the rose imagery!! I want to rose imagery casey!! obviously again yes the thematic overlap between these two things is only,, loose at best, we are very much ignoring many of the things utena is actually About,, but. disparity between idealised roles and how those roles actually function, having those images interrogated/torn down... growing up!! casey realising his parents' dream was imposed on him rather than chosen... even just kind of. the aesthetic make up of utena, the core components of how it actually tells its story. the focus on duels and being challenged... formalised process of DEMANDING to fight the current 'champion'... the shadow plays...

this to me is casey and valentino

anyway if u squint it is like. kind of the same energy as paddock gossip. the skits are also.... yeah hm. hm

moving away a bit from utena and its very specific themes, I think what you really can also do with this vision is like... play up the culture clash vibes for casey? I've been meaning to make the post on this forever, but there's a specific theme that comes through in a lot of the stuff casey's said and written over the years that's really concerned with... well, the trip from australia to europe, the hardship associated at various stages with that, never quite feeling at home in this new environment, zero paddock friends, never learning italian and being sick with the concept of italy by the end of his ducati tenure, saying that europeans weren't as straight talking and honest as the anglos (valentino did also help turn him off the concept of the british, mind you), saying the europeans were more partisan, bad sports fans, really kinda... wrestling with a lot of his loneliness and feelings of isolation by attributing a lot of this stuff to this different european mindset. where some of his competitors were nasty in part because that's what they're all like in big bad europe. and idk, that's something that you can really dig into with these abstractions, when you're isolating casey and then making him accept this Challenge of facing the god - through motorcycle racing but also through ritualistic sacrifice - and eventually he takes on this task that he's supposed to, that's supposed to be his duty, but for some reason everyone still hates him for it... and you play up how it's not necessarily his individual agency that even brought him there. he's there to win, and yet they hate him for winning. everyone wants competition, nobody likes the competition when it's actually there

also like. sleeping beauty him. pricked by the thorn of a rose and he's taken out of competition and has to recover and everyone criticises him for 'just' having his finger pricked with the tiniest drop of blood. idk a lot of his quite specific baggage and struggles are really made for abstraction. he's also got this... look. just a very specific vibe that I think you can magical girl-ify. vibrant red, a little bit delicate, as the shadows creep in on him

where it's kinda... he's unique, he's special, he's got All That Talent that allows him to take on a task nobody else has managed... but that's also part of what isolates him, that x factor of his raw natural ability that allows him to make it at the top of the sport In Spite Of All The Odds but also means he CAN'T get a quiet peaceful existence

and the rivalry with valentino, which, first of all they both make for great animated characters because they're incredibly distinctive (I would make utena!valentino so very very tall), but also that slight... element of menace. valentino constantly in the spotlight, and the brighter casey shines the more he's in danger - even if he rather wouldn't be the centre of attention. he still is.... even if he shies away from it, the world is still watching. valentino is still watching. and the gaze itself has consequences

literal glare of the camera lens, exposing casey in a way that makes him uncomfortable. unnerving and too bright and trapping him

casey looking at valentino and the changes in what he sees over time. the gradual adjustment of perception when he comes to learn of a different version of valentino (who is in turn still separate from Valentino The Person)

and that kind of animation style for the motorcycles and everything... thinking about specifically casey's phillip island 2009 which is his very first race win after his illness-induced absence and I've never personally been THAT big on white liveries (he still loves it though) but like. symbolism-inspired colour change for key step back into the fray, to a new moment of hope

his leathers also have like. a very specific vibe here. as do his interactions with valentino. the specific way they grasp hands idk I've got a vision

(they do also hug pretty warmly in parc fermé and there's a bit more to this race given it was a massive W for valentino as far as his title bid was concerned but he'd also been informed of a personal tragedy the day before - but we're gonna ignore all that here)

also OBVIOUSLY

the assen 2007 fight was SUPPOSED to be animated

it also lets you dig into kinda likeeee the weird elements of that rivalry where it switches from being a primarily on-track one to being a completely off-track one. like idk it feels you can play with that switch of them being real duels to just being. casey stabbing him while valentino taunts him. this disconnect where casey is now on top of the world in all the Actual Motorcycle Racing but the whole picture isn't quite as simple as that.... the ways in which casey can't entirely win....

other random fun bits of imagery/vibes:

again, you can have random animals running around in animation... tortoise turtle and the hare laguna '08 I will keep saying it

speaking of laguna '08, the most memorable move happens at the corkscrew... I think you can do something with concept of a corkscrew

laguna '08 overall is just a top ten anime battle isn't it, the fact that the whole thing depends on this. reversal. where rather than valentino always stalking his victims (inherently evocative) but is committing to obstructing casey from ahead (btw today's their anniversary!!! <3)

you have GOT to do something funky with pressers, like casey's relationship to the media is so fundamental to his entire story... essentially treat it as another form of combat imo. like give it the exact same visual lead in as the actual on-track battles, so that you have this collapse between the on-track and off-track

collapse between the identity of the rider and the bike. common thing anyway in the weird way these blokes talk about their bikes, obviously valentino is like. a number one offender for this. and obviously you can easily exploit this in animation!! and also if we're sticking with the yellow = infection stuff, then casey is constantly being at risk of overwhelmed by the yellow.... and once he's stepped away from that bike to go to honda instead, he has to see this thing that's separate from him but still somehow a part of him be infected

playing with how casey was inspired by valentino... you know the utena kinda. prologue of utena being inspired to become a prince... basically that vibe. stepping up to become a deity and being presented the blade to challenge a god. But Was That Really Such A Good Idea

you can do something with chequered flags I reckon. idk what but you do something with them

casey's obsessed with fishing. a symbol of childhood innocence and one of the things he would have loved to do when he was essentially being forced into making motorcycle racing his dream, something that caused controversy back in 2009 because he got backlash for going fishing during his injury absence (yeah I don't know what they were on back then too) and something he references when he retires on his pitboard 'going fishing'. it's innocence, it's his individual dream, it's peace away from the track... you can work with that

obviously valentino himself makes all this symbolism shit very easy given he did canonically give himself an eyeball helmet during one of his ducati races. like we get it buddy. that would SLAP in animation

okay I just need to say it. you know how in catalunya 2009 casey is just like. two seconds away from fainting on the podium and valentino/jorge are having their whole intense thing going on and are just. ignoring it. gets me every time, it's just such a bizarre discrepancy of vibes. like two different narratives are going on during that podium and they're just pretending like the other one isn't happening, except in casey's case that's extremely understandable and in the others' case?? idk I'd check on him?? power of animation I'm having casey literally faint and everyone ignoring it. maybe several times. sorry casey this is social critique on your behalf

if you have an equivalent utena walking up the stairs pre-race build up, it is so important to me to remember that casey crashed during the valencia 2009 warm up lap

something something valentino catalunya 2008 special italian football team leathers something casey's issues towards italy something them actually having a duel in that race while casey is just about trying to wrestle his italian manufacturer into making themselves useful for once... this is the first... second? turning point of the season. okay look there's several turning points. but crucially that's one of the big ones, when casey is starting to get the ducati situation sorted and they have a post-race test at catalunya and then casey goes on his little win streak that leads you to laguna. I think you can do something with the concept of italy here

something something taking on the number one plate symbolism

thinking of the utena stopwatch thing and how casey's mum was always making the notes for casey's races as a kid and they're included in his autobiography... like you've got this little kid with essentially performance reviews... idk something about constantly recording what he's doing. I can SEE that scene of animated kid!casey going around the dirt track while his mother is recording his progress with a stopwatch and notebook in my mind...

two-faced valentino... make it literal. Valentino The Racer and Valentino The Character and Valentino The Person as entities that casey meets separately

something about valentino's fucked up little fingers as his one vulnerability

valentino reeling in casey like a fish, is this anything

anyways. I love the dovi description... I still get like. nebulously sad about his 2020 where it's both kinda I get how this fell apart but it's so unsatisfying? which is the fun of it! narratively speaking. and the fact that he was such a big influence on the development of that bike, how possessive he got over that project and really saw it as his, how he ended up being unceremoniously dumped and he's seen them win again and again... again he does have the whole 'being well adjusted' thing working against him BUT idk there's a satisfying suitably cinematic story in there somewhere

and yeah I do see the jorge/dani vision!! I think that one's the one where I'm like. the least attached to the literal details and am quite happy to fictionalise it!! especially because lbr his path to his first title just Does Not Work narratively. like 2010 only works as a good conclusion of that arc if valentino is actually THERE to be defeated, or if jorge and dani actually have more of a title fight. and he does have an extremely queer-coded narrative!! you kinda have the actual family right, then the way he kinda... cycles through a few versions of what are essentially all found families, like he's got the whole manager situation which obviously in itself ends up a nightmare, then the coach turned manager he also split from then ?? it's kinda... that dimension of athletes where they're CHOOSING the people close to them (not that he's fully in a position to make a lot of these choices!!) and then has to cut ties when he becomes more aware of how those people are attempting to exploit him.... the whole number switching thing is explicitly framed as a form of liberation. his tendency to get Obsessed and a little Weird about all his major rivals (dani, valentino and dovi get the worst of this) like it's just a fun vibe to play with... the way the rivalry with dani is also a little Imposed from Above and also jorge doesn't get why dani keeps him at such a distance and is constantly trying to like. bug him into paying attention to jorge. he just makes for such a good coming of age story protagonist, like he's so vibrant and awkward and cocky and kind of ridiculous,,, prone to way too intense introspection and just overthinking EVERYTHING and he's trying to play a character while also wanting to find his authentic self or whatever... he's just such a Young Guy and his story with dani is full of that energy... yes

anyway. on to sete. you and me anon

valentino!!!! cuts!!!! his heart out!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THAT omg.... I love the idea that he'd just. be motivated to destroy sete enough that he's willing to take the final step.... the one that ensures his rule over the sport will never be challenged in any meaningful way but he also cannot return from, a line that he can't un-cross.... AND y'know I've banged on enough about this idea that valentino really DID change his approach to his rivals after that, acquired a bit of distance which would be!! fantastic, it's also that element of not just him Losing something but also him not wanting to go through those kinds of complicated emotions at the hands of someone who had been a friend again... removes his heart!! exorcises his softness!!

I kinda love the idea of making it... the natural conclusion of where that particular journey was taking him. like the idea that that's kinda always where he was headed... it's why I think the sachsenring/brno 2003 thing is so neat, like the fact brno is the site of both the big comeback win against sete but ALSO where he agreed to ride for yamaha in the middle of the night. that you're drawing the line between 'he wanted to be his own man' (seemingly a harmless motive, even admirable) with what 'being his own man' involves, aka psychologically torturing his rivals (possibly a little questionable). another thing I adore here is his phillip island 2004 celebrations when he seals the title..... what a spectacle!!!! in retrospect it's just kinda,, oh look what a fun celebration! he's having fun!! it's all a show!! because sete has been erased from that celebration. and that race is the culmination of BOTH those arcs set in motion at brno 2003, it's his great yamaha victory while also being deeply cruel... and before that the sepang celebrations... I just like the idea that what people tend to see as Good valentino traits (joyous, fun celebrations) and Bad valentino traits (working to destroy his rivals) are fundamentally impossible to detach from each other, and the only way you get rid of them both is by suppressing who he is as a person... now I'm not saying that the devil tempted him to join yamaha but I'm not not saying that? works with the ibiza trip between sachsenring and brno too, like you can parallel that to sete contemplating honda the previous year (this did Not canonically happen but narrative efficiency). it's all their choice!! but they were also Twisted By Circumstances.... valentino's corruption arc why does nobody see this is valentino's corruption arc....

[drink-tang-gang]

do u have any thoughts about tiny toons looniversity?

It was fine! I grew up liking animaniacs more than tiny toons (personally, I thought them the more apt successors to the tunes compared to tiny toons, but that thought blurb is for another day). Whenever I watched tt I was more focused on the lt cameos.

So it’s funny that I had a better time with looniversity than the animaniacs reboot! I definitely enjoyed the slapstick. I also loved the introduction of VERY creative toon lore and had a blast seeing it incorporated into the show. laughter literally as the backbone of the endurance of toon dna? How some toons are drawn with a bounceback deficiency (because not all cartoons are funny?) brilliant.

I still disagree with the babs and buster sibling arrangement. It created cliched problems in the show that the core of their characters had no issues with in the original… such as babs and buster learning to develop themselves outside the tight bond they have?? like in tiny toons, they were a duo through n through (so much they had to remind the audience there was no relation) yet they had no issue doing their own thing with their friends. it’s just a weird problem to create to me, and tiresome for twin archetypes. I joked with some friends that the decision was made so that there’d be room for the inevitable buster/plucky homoerotic rivalry and??? Honest to god dead of ass I was joking but the damn show coined their ship name by like. episode two. 🤣 they blow kisses at each other and then say they hate each other n everything. It’s like they’re trying to be giving baffy but baffy is so much funnier and spicier that I really don’t care for whatever thing they wanna tease in the future (because we all know Jokes is as far as they can legally go) with those two😭

haha, tangent aside I liked looniversity because of the creative location and use of both tunes and tiny toons. I could tell the crew had so much fun with Granny, she stole the spotlight for me whenever she appeared on screen. There’s so much respect and love for the cast in this show, it’s great! Some jokes didn’t land, of course, but they didn’t fall so hard to where it interrupted the flow of the story. More like little hiccups. I wasn’t too hot about some episodes being tweened (different studios for different episodes I suppose?) and the quality of anim imo, suffered. I probably won’t binge the next batch and watch episodes as I feel like watchin em :D

[homoerotic-shonen-rival-showdown]

Round Two Match Eight: Sasuke and Naruto (Naruto) vs Gojo and Geto (Jujutsu Kaisen)

why should you vote for them?

Sasuke and Naruto (autoqualified but still got 4 submissions):

duh

Idk I don’t go here I just wanna help them for all the tumblr girlies

because of every single crazy quote they’ve said

Gojo and Geto (3):

uh…divorced. i love them

STSG ESSAY TIME >:)))))) Warning for Jujutsu Kaisen anime/manga spoilers ahead! I had to explain deep dark depths of the story to prove that they deserve to win the crown. Here I go. Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru (also known as Satosugu or simply stsg) deserve to win the crown for the following reasons. Please bear with me throughout this whole essay because I am unequivocally insane about them. First of all let’s get into the rivalry side of things.

In high school, Gojo was an absolute menace. The first time Gojo and Geto met, the latter hated the former because he was annoying, rude, and arrogant. Now eventually they became best friends, but you see, their rivalry returned when Geto was exiled from the school because they had a stark disagreement in moral ideologies, which resulted in a dramatic breakup in front of a KFC (yes, this is actually canon). Gojo was supposed to execute Geto because he did some Bad Things (that we don’t need to get into right now) but as Geto walked away he said (paraphrased) “Go ahead and kill me. There’s meaning to that.” And My Lord is that a line. So for the next ten years of their lives, these two were separated, now on opposite sides, now each others’ enemies. Eventually this came to a climax when Geto declared war on Gojo, but before we get to that, let’s pause for a second, and talk about the meaning behind this all. I’ll try to make this part quick because without restraint this would become excessively long. So technically, Gojo and Geto’s breakup directly caused the plot of Jujutsu Kaisen to unfold. If they hadn’t broken up, then Geto wouldn’t have declared war and then died. If they hadn’t broken up, Geto’s body wouldn’t have been possessed; his body wouldn’t have, completely against his will, trapped Gojo in a prison, as Geto sat back helpless, unable to do anything to stop his best friend from being sealed *by his own hands*. Every single other tragic event that happened in Jujutsu Kaisen would not have happened, because, assuming you have never watched/read Jujutsu Kaisen, no, Gojo and Geto are not the main characters, and the whole rest of the cast was affected by this event. Yes, this homoerotic rivalry breakup is the very Big Bang for Jujutsu Kaisen, because if it didn’t happen, Jujutsu Kaisen wouldn’t have the incredible plot that it has. Butterfly Effect at its finest. Anyway, now that their rivalry is out of the way, I will now get into their homoeroticism.

My first piece of evidence for their homoeroticism is that… it’s in the name. Both of their first names start with “s” and end with “ru”. Both of their last names start with “g” and end with “o”. And both of their full names have the same amount of syllables. There is no possible way that this wasn’t done on purpose to get the point across that they are literal soulmates. Do I sound insane yet? In addition, Gojo called Geto, and I quote, “my one and only”. Now if that isn’t some fruit ass shit then idk what is. And now the most damning evidence of homoness, comes when Geto died by Gojo’s side. This was after the war that Geto declared on Gojo, and Geto ended up on the losing side. Even though they had been rivals for ten long years, they still had an important and heartfelt history together, so as Gojo walked over to his dying best friend, Geto smiled, glad to see not only an old friend, but the most important person in his life, for the last time. Gojo’s last words to Geto as he died were NEVER REVEALED. Only very very few producers of the anime know the words. They will be released soon but for now we don’t know. But it was confirmed that his last words were THREE WORDS. Now I don’t wanna put any words in Gojo’s mouth but the most obvious theory here is that he said “I love you” as his best friend and rival of 10+ years died by his side. This is even further affirmed when, after hearing those three words, Geto BLUSHED, SMILED (as he was in the process of bleeding out!) and described the words as (paraphrased) “embarrassing words that they had never said to each other before”. IT’S BARELY SUBTEXT AT THIS POINT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THEY’RE GAY AS HELL!

Now before this gets any longer I will cut myself off here. Thank you for coming to my way-too-long Ted Talk about these stupid ass anime men who have been plaguing my mind for months, I hope you take my submission into consideration! I don’t expect them to win but I’m just happy I get to aggressively type an essay about them in this google form :D

[floatingcatacombs]

Bandai Taketh Away

12 Days of Aniblogging 2023, Day 1

Last year I wrote a post extolling the virtues of Birdie Wing, 2022’s breakthrough “how the fuck did this get made” mafia golf campfest. It’s the little show that could, animated on a shoestring budget to an audience of maybe two dozen extremely online yuri fans who tried their hardest to get literally anyone else to watch it.

It was almost certainly a financial failure for Bandai Namco, whose hopes for kicking off a VR-focused franchise fizzled in real time during season 1. But the resulting anime was a blast, a shoujo sports melodrama where literally anything could happen.

Birdie Wing took a few seasons off between its cours, during which Bandai Namco’s second lesbian anime of the year began airing: Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury. My jaw dropped as I watched the first episode recreate Utena’s setup beat for beat, including the female main character taking another girl as her fiancé. It’s a gutsy move which set my expectations high. G-Witch was my introduction to Gundam, and the highs of the first season were amazing. Even if I had some occasional complaints with the pacing, the cliffhanger ending and narrative ambition left me very excited for more.  

Season 2 of Birdie Wing was set to fill the gap between cours of G-Witch, but ~something~ happened behind the scenes. It ended up being delayed to Spring 2023, where the two shows would air together. Great! That means double the lesbians. Or…zero?

Fair warning: From here on out I will be both a hater, and a spoiler.

Both seasons start without a hitch. G-Witch finally pops the safety bubble of its setting, with a terrorist attack on the academy followed up by an episode from the viewpoint of Dawn of Fold soldiers trying to survive a retaliatory crackdown from the Spacians. It pulled no punches with its violence and war orphans and trauma, a good sign for the struggles that awaited the main cast. Meanwhile, Birdie Wing continued to pay tribute to old-school Class S after its boarding school arc by involving its cast in a nightmare incest soap opera concerning Eve and Aoi’s parentage and the sins of the previous generation. Both are great developments for their respective shows, suggesting plenty of good stuff ahead.

Unfortunately, this is when both of these shows begin to fall apart. Eve and Aoi manage to beat the incest allegations, but afterwards their relationship just…stops. Their chemistry all but dissipates, the homoerotic rivalry giving way to their personal relationships with golf instead of with each other. The plot keeps the two of them apart as much as possible, devoid of the angsty longing from season 1, as the girls each succumb to a different form of golf cancer (even without the gay-baiting, at least Birdie Wing is still insane).

For G-Witch, a much more ambitious anime, this decline manifests as a creeping realization that they’re simply going to drop most of the open plot threads. The show takes its sweet time, even as it becomes clear that it’s barreling towards a finale at 24 episodes. The long-awaited plot twists are handled fine, I guess. But any sense that the show is aiming for greatness fades away, as it simply tries to drag itself to the finish line, buckling under its own weight. What we see on screen is what we get, and you’ll have to fill in the blanks yourself to really be happy. The Earthian-Spacian conflict ends up as mere set-dressing, and characters who clearly had intertwined backstories never even get the chance to interact. The obvious examples are the man who killed Suletta’s dad in the prologue resurfacing and that never really coming up, and everything to do with Chuchu and Nika’s backstories. I’m not here to nitpick, but it’s a shame that everyone’s characterization is left so thin. G-Witch really feels like it was meant to be a full 50-episode series, and I’m led to believe that this trimming down happened during production, as there’s just no other reason to set so much up without resolving it.

At last we reach each show's conclusion. Birdie Wing is saddled with a final arc full of professional tournaments, which is always going to be weaker than the dirty mafia golf on a conceptual level. The timeline begins to rapidly accelerate and suddenly we’re skipping ahead months, and then entire years. We don’t get to see most of Eve and Aoi’s final game, or even the period of time where they reconcile. An enduring friendship and rivalry is implied at the end, but it’s nowhere near the mutual obsession that the prior season depicted. Not an ounce of queerbait remains, even for the terminally yurigoggled such as myself.

Meanwhile, G-Witch dedicates some of its precious final minutes to a fight with Lauda (Jesus Christ is the Schwartzette is wasted on him), and just like Birdie Wing the two girls at the heart of the show barely get any time together as the end draws near. They ultimately opt for a Macross-Symphogear ending in which Suletta pilots a Gundam that shoots gay rainbow lasers and defeats her mom with the power of love and friendship. That’s fine! But that’s the ending for a show that didn’t happen! In its last act G-Witch retreats into its shell, unable to commit to the moral weight of the world it had built up. Laughably, the epilogue time-skips to a neoliberal utopia where Miorine solves the earth-space conflict through her sheer girlboss acumen. Suletta and Miorine’s gay wedding is implied at best, and an after-credits message states that this is the conclusion of The Witch from Mercury as a story, prematurely killing any potential follow-up.

The rest is history. Kadokawa redacts an interview to remove references to Suletta and Miorine being married, Bandai releases a statement that their status at the end of the show should be left up to interpretation, and everyone is mad forever.

What happened? Both of these shows fell apart at the same time, and both in a manner that defused their implicit queerness. Birdie Wing was always a bit of a trainwreck even at its best, so in a vacuum I would have just concluded that the production ran out of steam, unable to live up to its earlier writing. But the timing of Season 2’s delay, combined with the corporate meddling that affected G-Witch, makes me downright conspiratorial. Something went down at Bandai Namco, and it led to them ordering their productions be revised halfway through to scrub out all the gay shit and play things safe. I wouldn’t be surprised if this occurred at the same time as G-Witch was trimmed down from its initial 50 to 24 episodes with no chance of a continuation. It’s also not too much of a stretch to imagine Birdie Wing receiving a “stick to sports" mandate and Yosuke Kuroda subsequently phoning it in. I don't know how else to say it: there's no reason to do an incest fakeout if you're not even going to follow up on it afterwards once you've gone through the difficult work of exonerating them.

Witch from Mercury was a commercial success (it sold a shitton of gunpla, at least!) so it seems like a surprise that Bandai Namco would clamp down creatively in such a destructive way. Or maybe not. This may be the first female-led Gundam, but in a lot of other ways it’s fairly restrained as far as Gundams go. Perhaps BN decided that G-Witch had to be a balancing act to please everyone, preventing the creative staff from truly swinging for the fences in the end. Of course, that backfired horribly and they ended up pissing off himejoshis and regular mecha fans alike. I know it’s something of a fool’s errand to expect undeniable LGBT representation from anime, but when you begin with an explicit Utena homage, I expect better.

This has all been a bit of a downer, so I wanted to end things by sharing the anime I watched this year that actually gave me what I wanted out of those two shows.

Watching through the original Mobile Suit Gundam made me realize just how conservative G-Witch is in a lot of its storytelling. 0079 is a deeply radical show for its time, and still would be if you made it today. The unhesitating depiction of war and death through the aesthetics of a 70’s children’s show is particularly bold, and even the parts of the anime notorious for being overlong successfully reinforce the overall mood of the work. Amuro’s transformation from innocent child to unrelenting psychic soldier is as inevitable and upsetting as it should be, and even with all the “filler” the script feels much tighter than the G-Witch, which ambles around with side stories that don’t resolve and characters that don’t go anywhere. Imminently watchable. I love that the mommy issues in Gundam go all the way back, and I'm also starting to understand why you fuckers have been arguing about Char Aznable for 40 years.

you.

I also watched Kakegurui this year, which served as a great alternative to Birdie Wing. It doubles down on the best parts of that show – mostly-female cast, high stakes gambling, dubious lesbian rep – with an all-consuming sleaze to it. Grab some friends who aren't easily scandalized and try not to worry too hard about gaze or the intended audience, and it will be a hoot. The production values are great, even if most of it inevitably goes to girls making upsetting faces. The first opening in particular is an animation highlight. Of course, this is a MAPPA production, so they’re far too busy flaying their workers alive in the pits of hell to ever get around to another season. May their company unionize or perish.

[just-a-shark333]

Theres this one Person who has me blocked (because they're offended by the gimmick blog I run(@get-shakespeared-nerd)) but they made an addition on this one big "I've only seen this reposted elsewhere" post that jeeps popping up on my dash, so it's always like a ":0 you!!! :D" reaction from me because I like to pretend we have a homoerotic anime rivalry (even though I'm pretty sure they genuinely hate me)

[why0should0i]

I love blue lock but i would have really like it if blue lock was about girls instead of boys... They keep the premise and characters same but they are girls... All the girls are crazy and obsessed with soccer... They talk about egos and they steal the ball from their teammates... Girl Raichi is still as agressive... Girl Bachira is still as crazy... Girl Shidou and Girl Rin are the same and they fight each other by punching and kicking and pulling hair... Girl Reo and Girl Nagi are the same and they still are gay and Girl Reo braids Girls Nagi's hair and does her mackup and picks out dresses for when they go out cause is still a lazy slacker and those entire interactions are so queer coded that the subject becomes text... The homoerotic tension and rivalries and undertones are all there... They are girls... No, they don't have an eposide dedicated where the talk about boys... Yes the matches are still as intense... No there aren't any wierd boob and ass and panties undershots... Why can't people be normal about teenage girls and their bodies... Why do they always have to sexualized in media... Every time I take a bath i don't bathe in this uncomfortable sexy way... Ego jinpachi is a woman who is crazy... Anri chan can be a man for once... The characters have different body types... Not all of them are slim or curvy and whatever thier body type they are not sexualized...

In fact having girls in a sports manga can mean more drama added to the plot and no i don't mean boys and fighting over crushes🙄🙄... The women's team isn't being taken seriously even though they won more than the men's team on a national and international level... The funding is low... Parents hesitate to send their daughters because "playing pro is a boy's thing... Girls should have more realistic dream"🙄🙄... Yes that is a widely prevalent attitude in more conservative countries...

Just imagine a character who was routinely berated by her parents for playing soccer because it was too masculine and a woman becoming pro would be a) bad face for the family for stupid patriarchy reason b) becoming a pro as a woman is harder due to funding reasons and such so the character is forced to drop soccer and she drops her dreams into the trashcan and just when she loses all hope she finds a letter for her from blue lock she rans away from home into blue lock and bows to never return home and when the other characters find out and say where will she go back if she loses in blue lock she says she will live and die for soccer but she makes it as a regular member in the u 20 match where she plays with such a smile on her face and she is so amazing and happy that her parents realise how shitty they are and then the manga panes the the character where she says that even if she has to make an enemy of the entire world she will play soccer and that is her ego and we all wait for three years for the scene to be animated and when it does we lose our minds because it is so amazing and everything is better because it is girls and there is so much lesbian fruity vibes coming from the character and another character who is like I've always believed in you and she says to the character play soccer all you want I'll never be your enemy only your friend... And the hug each other and look lovingly into each other eyes and there are no guys and it's amazing...

And also you can go a bit darker where you can touch on the topic of how old sleazy men are often in positions of power in women's sports and they coerce the young aspiring teenage girl players into sexual relations and maybe the reason girl sae wanted girl rin to quit was because something terrible happened in Spain and she wants to protect her sister... And there can be discussions of body issues and eating disorders not that boys don't suffer them either but teenage girls are statistically more affected by them...

But anyways i think it would be amazing if there was a sports manga where there are all the traditional tropes of popular sports manga like haikyuu and kuroko no baske and prince of tennis... All the extensive sports analysis and commentary and insane matches and skill that borders on Naruto powers and the hype and rivalries and the underdog defeating powerful opponents and a huge cast of different various players where some are nice some are mean some are arrogant and they all have thier own insecurities and feelings that they are not enough...but instead of teenage boys it's teenage girls and i would really like to see crazy ass teenage girls play soccer like in blue lock... It would be so much better... Thank you...

[nutzworth]

got an anonymous tip for some more hunter x hunter yaoi. so here we are.

short reminder: in another assorted yaoi rating i rated kurapika x leorio 8/10 theyre really anime and really 2000s but the thing that gets me is that kurapika is so... girl? why is he a beautiful woman? its like straight yaoi. but its an 8 and thats still good

anyway: new yaoi on the chopping block. ging x pariston. its good. its really good. stupid divorced old man yaoi rivalry. oh yeah. guy who doesnt care about anyone except this one guy, who he hates. and the feelings mutual. they seem like theyd chain themselves together L and light style. theyre getting an 8/10 im tempted to bring it down to 7 cus theyre not widely known but JESUS. theres this one panel that is SO YAOI. i think they have to stay at an 8. here i can just put the image in here

like.... jesus? oh my god? okay. Okay. theyre having sex. okay. but theyre not a 9 cus i couldnt find more homoerotic tension other than this 1 page. 8/10 thanks

oh i should do gon and fuck whats his name. the white haired boy. killua. i should do them. theyre like 12 but whatever. i remember this one little voice clip of one of the anime intermissions or something? and killua was like SO HOMOSEXUAL toward gon. and gon was like Haha. What? ^^ killua was like I Want You. i think theyre cute. its not PURE yaoi but its silly. 5/10. childhood friends turned boyfriends. but its not YAOI. theyre in a gay relationship but its not yaoi. you get me. im not explainig any more

[cacklingblobbittyrabbitty]

unhinged rainbow magic post 11 of 12

Ok most of this is insane rambling but for one part of it you’re going to need to remember Bethany the Ballet Fairy’s tragic backstory of having a gay quarter life crisis because of a homoerotic ballet rivalry with a girl who she loses the lead role in a show to please and thank you

MAGICAL CREATURES FAIRIES (hurray for cute animals again!)

Ashley Dragon looks like a dragon version of nessie the loch ness monster, which is a great design tbh DRAGON ON THE JEANS YES Also different versions of dragons! we love diversity Outfit does not match but she makes me not care! It’s different colours but its the right shade of each colour (this is such good colour theory knowledge El well done) HAIR EXCELLENCE Pockets! Sandals are not the right shade of yellow, it should match the top or the dragon on the trousers - also the chunky looking design is ugly, she needs to either go barefoot or have jesus sandals

Lara So well put together oh my god This is a witch not a fairy Adorable kitty! Cat lady vibes (cardigan) but super super cool (skinny jeans and boots) I am WEAK for those boots omg Lovely hair as well

Erin How is her hair literal fire??? Idk but I am Loving It Lara’s a witch, Erin is a goddess Freckles!!!!!! THIS is how you do a headband! The honeysuckle fire flower thing? ADORABLE Viking esque fur neck thing is NICE it has how to train your dragon vibes She’d take me to a pagan ritual involving a bonfire and I’d enjoy it Dress? INSANE This is a GOOD BELT TAKE NOTES it’s a lovely asymmetrical waist ribbon band thing!!!!!  Her delightful sandals have greek goddess vibes I’m living Girl could set me on fire and i’d thank her

Rihanna AHHHHH THE LIL BUBBLE AND THE SEAHORSE ARE SO CUTE Congrats on having decent blonde hair! Barefoot + anklet = beach ass vibes babey Her dress gives me the feeling of being underwater and looking up at the sun Mamma Mia vibes! Groovy and beachy and blonde This dress is kinda growing on me ngl The hem looks good on her and I like the shape of the neckline, but it should be a thinner line of green Rihanna absolutely votes for the Green Party btw

Sophia  Her creature is a cygnet cos it’s small and raggedy but it’s white instead of grey? First impressions she kinda looks like a bad art project but still cute I really like her hair tho its very cute with the ribbon Movie sleepover vibes This girl is wearing slippers. A pyjama top. And a really nice skirt. Is she halfway through getting dressed???? Feathery inspiration of her skirt is good, it looks like she’s halfway through a swan transformation Colour scheme is very cute and dreamy vibes

HEADCANONS: please remember Bethany’s backstory again thank you! This is the girl who takes the role of Odette in Bethany’s dance company, and the girl with whom Bethany has a homoerotic rivalry. Sophia weaponises flirting because it amuses her, especially aggressive flirting, like Bethany can be leaning against a wall and Sophia will come and put her leg up on Bethany’s shoulder. Sophia just delights in getting really close to her all the time. Sophia is into Bethany, Bethany is into her, Bethany knows neither of these facts. She has a high ponytail when she’s doing ballet and it just makes Bethany's brain go offline. Later in life they’ll run into each other, when Sophia has a high-powered ballet girlfriend and Bethany has her wife the costume designer and her really chill life. Sophia will apologise for making Bethany freak out but she really was into Bethany, and Bethany will reply yeah you fucked up my life for sure, but I don’t think I would have quit without you so thanks. Also your leg gave me horny nightmares. 

Leona (unicorn) Shit this is horrific I hate it all Well done on having a cute animal and absolutely nothing else Long flowy blue dress with more renaissance vibes please (see below picture) 

ok good we fixed it moving on

Caitlin (ice bear) The bear is so fluffy and it looks like shiver from barbie and the magic of pegasus awwww Swiss ski resort vibes are top notch Colour scheme? Yes Fluffiness? Yes Cosiness? Yes The haircut is really cute but I want more of a brown shade with less green in it thanks

[chronicmoirail]

Different types of potential Kismesisitudes that i have rattling around in my brain

I can fix him but I am not going to like it.

Prank wars but we are giggling and kicking our feet the whole time (leprechauncore)

they are everything I want to be and it pisses me off and I am going to stick with them for the betterment of both of us.

this fucking asshole- *makes out*

I have got to become better than this freak *intense homoerotic rivalry ensues*

*villain monologue* *hero monolouge* *intense anime battle* *everyone turns out alright in the end because they love each other* Okay see you next Wednesday Terry! <3< ^_^ 💖💖💖 (aka whatever doofenshmirtz and perry have going on)

I don’t like you very much, frankly you piss me off, just thinking about you makes my blood boil, talk to me and I will be soooo fucking mad afterwards. But also I want to have sex with you. (Can be unhealthy. Would not recommend this type)

*flirting but mean* *flirting back but mean*

death threats written in glitter pens

Fuckin. Fuckin love this quadrant.

[corviacore]

Ok but I don't want pink pretty girlies that have colourful transformations and are all conventionally hot and have the same bodytype.

Ok that sounded very mean, many of those shows in the magical girl genre are good ,but it's not what I and other people mean when we say we want shonen with girls.

I at least want gritty combat, the fucking stupid homoerotic rivalry and the betrayal and bs we get in shonen I want a *shonen* with girls not a magical girl anime.

friend was lamenting the lack of girls in the shonen she was watching so I had some advice for her

[possesseddog]

anyone wanna be anime rivals with me

requirements: must be willing to get really close to my face when yelling at me, corner me to "intimidate" me frequently, argue with me over petty things, get into a fist fight and scream at me when our rivalry boils over,

appreciated but not required: heavily identify with the color red (i'm blue-coded), be a biology or marine science major (we don't necessarily have to major in the same thing to be rivals, but it will help)

please submit your resumes in the ask box, if I call you in for an interview please prepare your best insults, and be ready for a demonstration of your homoerotic fighting and/or arguing skills

[youreaclownnow]

if i knew nothing about gundam, which i don't, what would you tell me it's about. in plot, theme or characters, etc. whichever you like. how would you sell it to someone basically lol.

well the first thing i should say is that there is a lot, and i mean A LOT of content. its an over 40 year old anime (and manga and light novels and plastic models, but for the sake of this ill just discuss the anime) franchise, with the very first series being released in 1979. theres many series under the gundam umbrella, some series are connected to others, yet there are also plenty of stand alone shows as well. Gundam at its core is a story about war, featuring giant robots. its about the horrors of violence and fascism, the impact of war on the people living through it, and the humanity we all share.

as an added bonus we also have:

-homoerotic rivalries

-space autism

-a great variety of unique and fun characters

-some of the best OST ive ever heard in my life

-haro

[homoerotic-shonen-rival-showdown]

Round One Match Sixteen: Yusuke Urameshi and Kazuma Kuwabara (Yu Yu Hakusho) vs Gojo and Geto (Jujutsu Kaisen)

why should you vote for them?

Yusuke Urameshi and Kazuma Kuwabara (4):

OH MY GOODNESS Kuwabara is SO whipped for Yusuke like im not kidding. he constantly is trying to beat Yusuke in strength, but most of all he seems to want his acknowledgement and attention. we see Kuwabara actually GRINNING with JOY when Yusuke remembers his name for the first time. theyre constantly at each others throats, but trust each other with their life more than anyone else. crazy kids!!!

There are a number of times where they each almost die or actually die and the other has a full breakdown about how the other's not allowed to die because then who would they beat up? The first time this happens is at the very beginning of the series before anything even happens and they're supposedly just normal middle school punks. They say they hate each other but they very clearly don't. Gay af

they start off as rivals and then go to teammates, but also in a "I will still win over you" way, and in a "no one can kick his ass but me" way, and they should kiss about it

Gojo and Geto (3):

uh...divorced. i love them

STSG ESSAY TIME >:)))))) Warning for Jujutsu Kaisen anime/manga spoilers ahead! I had to explain deep dark depths of the story to prove that they deserve to win the crown. Here I go. Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru (also known as Satosugu or simply stsg) deserve to win the crown for the following reasons. Please bear with me throughout this whole essay because I am unequivocally insane about them. First of all let's get into the rivalry side of things.

In high school, Gojo was an absolute menace. The first time Gojo and Geto met, the latter hated the former because he was annoying, rude, and arrogant. Now eventually they became best friends, but you see, their rivalry returned when Geto was exiled from the school because they had a stark disagreement in moral ideologies, which resulted in a dramatic breakup in front of a KFC (yes, this is actually canon). Gojo was supposed to execute Geto because he did some Bad Things (that we don't need to get into right now) but as Geto walked away he said (paraphrased) "Go ahead and kill me. There's meaning to that." And My Lord is that a line. So for the next ten years of their lives, these two were separated, now on opposite sides, now each others' enemies. Eventually this came to a climax when Geto declared war on Gojo, but before we get to that, let's pause for a second, and talk about the meaning behind this all. I'll try to make this part quick because without restraint this would become excessively long. So technically, Gojo and Geto's breakup directly caused the plot of Jujutsu Kaisen to unfold. If they hadn't broken up, then Geto wouldn't have declared war and then died. If they hadn't broken up, Geto's body wouldn't have been possessed; his body wouldn't have, completely against his will, trapped Gojo in a prison, as Geto sat back helpless, unable to do anything to stop his best friend from being sealed *by his own hands*. Every single other tragic event that happened in Jujutsu Kaisen would not have happened, because, assuming you have never watched/read Jujutsu Kaisen, no, Gojo and Geto are not the main characters, and the whole rest of the cast was affected by this event. Yes, this homoerotic rivalry breakup is the very Big Bang for Jujutsu Kaisen, because if it didn't happen, Jujutsu Kaisen wouldn't have the incredible plot that it has. Butterfly Effect at its finest. Anyway, now that their rivalry is out of the way, I will now get into their homoeroticism.

My first piece of evidence for their homoeroticism is that... it's in the name. Both of their first names start with "s" and end with "ru". Both of their last names start with "g" and end with "o". And both of their full names have the same amount of syllables. There is no possible way that this wasn't done on purpose to get the point across that they are literal soulmates. Do I sound insane yet? In addition, Gojo called Geto, and I quote, "my one and only". Now if that isn't some fruit ass shit then idk what is. And now the most damning evidence of homoness, comes when Geto died by Gojo's side. This was after the war that Geto declared on Gojo, and Geto ended up on the losing side. Even though they had been rivals for ten long years, they still had an important and heartfelt history together, so as Gojo walked over to his dying best friend, Geto smiled, glad to see not only an old friend, but the most important person in his life, for the last time. Gojo's last words to Geto as he died were NEVER REVEALED. Only very very few producers of the anime know the words. They will be released soon but for now we don't know. But it was confirmed that his last words were THREE WORDS. Now I don't wanna put any words in Gojo's mouth but the most obvious theory here is that he said "I love you" as his best friend and rival of 10+ years died by his side. This is even further affirmed when, after hearing those three words, Geto BLUSHED, SMILED (as he was in the process of bleeding out!) and described the words as (paraphrased) "embarrassing words that they had never said to each other before". IT'S BARELY SUBTEXT AT THIS POINT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THEY'RE GAY AS HELL!

Now before this gets any longer I will cut myself off here. Thank you for coming to my way-too-long Ted Talk about these stupid ass anime men who have been plaguing my mind for months, I hope you take my submission into consideration! I don't expect them to win but I'm just happy I get to aggressively type an essay about them in this google form :D

[baebeyza]

Rating the homoerotic tension between all opposing leaders

@quetzalpapalotl asked for this, so I shall deliver

SAY GO! (note: I will use the japanese names for the animes)

G1: Optimus Prime and Megatron

They got that homoeroticism alright, seen clearly in their hilarious banter and one-liners.

Also, Megatron kept clones of the guy. That is the most villain homoroticism you can think of. 10/10

G1: Rodimus Prime and Galvatron

They got some carnal stuff going on, I mean this?

That's some chef kiss stuff right there!

Sadly, their homoeroticism isn't continued that much in season 3, and Galvatron cries out for Ultra Magnus' blood a few times. 6/10 Headmasters: Fortress Maximus and Megazarak

Oh dear this is such a one-sided dynamic!

Megazarak is all about wanting to take revenge on Fortress for casting him out of their home planet Master, but Fortress never acknowledges that!

Not even a "Ah, Megazarak hates me for this", like he legit couldn't give a shit about that dude's reason if he tried! 0/10

Masterforce: Ginrai and Overlord

I'm writing this only to gush about these two because I LOVE THEM!

They have my favourite opposing leader dynamic in all TF media I watched.

I mean it starts with Ginrai losing to Overlord on their first fight! He almost dies, and I love it! Because after that, Ginrai starts to be fearful about fighting again, something he pushes through because his need to protect Earth is greater than his fear! QuQ

And when that stupid orb Devil Z is vocal about hating humanity, Overlord seeks to defeat Ginrai, his enternal rival, with just pure strength instead of any robot gadgets. He needs Ginrai to prove the strength of his own humanity.

And MATES, when that stupid orb Devil Z wants to kill Overlord, who saves him? GINRAI DOES! Why? Because of his humanity!

LISTEN!

They have a rivalry going on as two leaders of opposing sides, but they connect over their shared humanity! Humanity that is defined by mercy and love!

Is it homoerotic??? MAYBE NOT, BUT I LOVE IT ANYWAY! QnQ

At the very least, I find this little fight scene to be homoerotic, the way Ginrai traps Overlord in that hold and how Overlord says Ginrai's name, das nice- ~

10/10, I don't care that Overlord is two people and half woman

Victory: Star Saber and Deszaras

I have to give credit to their homoeroticism for their last fight at least, that was nice!

I also liked that Des' super weapon is connected to his crotch, that adds a little naughty touch.

But come on Des, you can't be all erotic with your enemy-boo if you never get out of your stupid throne! And Star Saber? Why do you never care to engage your rival with something personal once? Huh? Get petty, get nasty! Don't just stand there not caring and just spouting heroic bullshit!

They hardly even try :/ 2/10

Beast Wars: Optimus Primal and Megatron

Primal and Megatron just don't do that stuff, really. Megatron tried once when he wanted Primal to join him, but thats about it. Megatron has plenty of homoeroticism, but not much for Primal u.u 1/10

Beast Wars II: Lio Convoy and Galvatron

Lio Convoy and Galvatron had one moment of gay, and it was when Galvatron helped to save Gaia from destruction. Lio Convoy offered him peace, which Galvs refused.

This would be about it, really. 1/10

Beast Wars Neo: Big Convoy and Magmatron

Magmatron got a bit more heat for Big Convoy, like he really wants to defeat him after having lost once before. Sadly, we just don't see much of that.

One episode has them fight, but then never again.

The only other good scene I could remember is when Unicron "kills" Magmatron, and Big Convoy wants to save him. Big Convoy also gave Magnmatron credit for trying to defeat Unicron - He did that before anyone else did!

We could have seen more, but I liked their dynamic overall! 3/10

Beast Machines: Optimus Primal and Megatron

Primal and Megatron do hate each other so much in this show, but its not gay.

It doesn't have the fun part of teasing and getting under your rivals skin, its just hatred. They just want to beat the shit out of each other. (and Megatron even does!)

It's engaging enough, but just not gay 0/10

Car Robots: Fire Convoy and Gigatron (RiD01)

These two have a similar problem as Star Saber and Des - Gigatron just hardly leaves his room, so they hardly ever fight!

They get this bitter exes talk in the first episode, but then we just never see that again, really.

The only saving grace is Black Convoy, who counts as love baby between them. He's worth 1 point! 1/10

Micron Densetsu: Convoy and Megatron (Armada)

Their final fight. Just that last fight. It says it all. 10/10 for that last fight. Overall though? They weren't built up properly, so I can't give them a high score 5/10

Superlink: Grand Convoy and Galvatron (Energon)

Galvatron in this show is so unhinged and feral for Convoy, I just love it! That dude gets a mental breakdown about the idea of someone else killing Convoy!

Sadly, Convoy doesn't return the feralness and wish to fight as much u.u 6/10, and its all from Galvs

Galaxy Force: Galaxy Convoy and Master Megatron (Cybertron)

There is one gay scene between them and it's this

The rest is just eh. I appreciate Master Megatron's determination to be a constant pain in the ass for Galaxy Convoy, so he gets points for that. 3/10

TFA: Optimus Prime and Megatron

I would share a video that shows how homoerotic their final dynamic is, but I can only share one video per post and I refuse to take down the one with Ginrai and Overlord, so just enjoy me quoting:

Megatron: The question should be, don't you recognize your own enemy? Optimus: Megatron? Megatron: Ah, then you do remember my name! Pity I can't remember yours.

Megatron: You're a persistent little Autobot! Optimus: My name is Optimus Prime!

Megatron: If I cannot save my clones, I'll at least have the satisfaction of destroying you, Optimus Prime! Optimus: So you can remember my name.

Three different scenes, all building up for some really nice gay :D 10/10

TFP: Optimus Prime and Megatron

They got something sweet - A nice angsty backstory of friends being torn apart!

Optimus fights because he has to without being happy about it, while Megatron lost sight of what was once important and only cares about rubbing his victory under Optimus' mask!

It's tragic, its intense, its gay as fuck, and it deserves a 10/10 for that scene in which Optimus lets his tires run over Megan's face

RiD15: Bumblebee and Steeljaw

I will say one thing about these two - Steeljaw really learnt to hate Bee on a personal level!

At first, Bee was just obstacle for him, but the longer their fight went on, the more anger Steeljaw showed him! It got feral man, it got feral!

Steeljaw got to a point where he was like "and fuck you in specific!"

And then they even worked together at the end, but not before Bee kept Steeljaw in a cage for a while - das gay UvU 8/10

Transformers GO!: Optimus Prime and Dragotron

Hahaha, gosh, the gayest thing in that toy ad with an intro are the bois! I guess 0/10

Prime Wars: Optimus and Megatron

I wouldn't have added them because they are neither leaders nor enemies, but Barbie said to do it-

They got some nice old man gay energy, simply because they get along. They got some chats, Optimus trying to be nice and peaceful and Megatron is all condescending in a jokey way uvu

"You're precious!" best line.

They work together perfectly without words and that creates some nice homoerotic moments! 8/10

Cyberverse Optimus Prime and Megatron

Gay enough to actually manage a mild peace and for Megatron to die pathetically in another mech's arms, being called old friend. Which is just old men talk for lover.

Fine, I'll give'em some points. But don't complain 7/10

War for Cybertron Optimus Prime and Megatron

I wouldn't say it was gay as such - They both had their own inner turmoil to deal with and their dynamic was festered with all that.

Megatron hated Optimus and blamed him for everything going wrong, refusing to work with him and was determined to view him as the bad guy while he is the hero!

And that is hardly gay drama 2/10

Extra: War for Cybertron Optimus Primal and Beast! Megatron

They didn't interact much but they had one fight in which they had some nice conversation OuO Imma give that some points! 5/10