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forestwater87 · 4 years ago

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Chapter 15: Grand Gesture

Summary: GRAND GESTURE: He or she must be willing to put it all on the line now or risk losing the one thing they need to become whole-hearted. It’s life or death now.

CW: Smut in the last third of the chapter. Questionable quality.

Summer 2017

“Fuck!” Gwen felt her center of gravity shift as she leaned forward, overbalancing on the rickety chair she’d been using to reach the ceiling. It tipped perilously on two legs, then lost the fight with physics and sent her sprawling with a crash that shook the dozens of tiny papers taped around the room. She hit the ground with her hip and the side of her face, one of them making a disturbing crunch sound and both shooting bright white pain down her entire right side. “Shit!”

She was halfway to her feet, wondering if the crossed-eyes dizzy feeling was from lack of sleep, hitting her head, or marker fumes, when fingers closed around her upper arm and she was hauled upright. “Gwen! Goodness, are you okay?” David let go of her, his gaze roving around the room as he took a step back. “What happened in here?”

She looked around, taking a deep breath and noticing for the first time in hours the thick perfume of tacky glue and paint, as though David walking in had turned her senses back on. It was done, mostly. Well, no — it’d never really be done, but it was enough to prove her point.

She hoped.

While she was panicking, David had wandered over to the center of the room, ducking to avoid a string of origami animals dangling from the ceiling. “Is this for camp?”

“Yes — I mean, no, it’s from camp, and maybe we can reuse some of it but no, it’s . . . not really . . .” She’d planned this, during her mad crafting frenzy: how David would come home, wonder what she was doing, and she’d carefully tour him through everything — or maybe she’d let him get on with his morning routine while she added a few more things, made it just a bit closer to perfect.

But his presence had pulled her to a halt. She’d been like a shark all night, afraid to stop moving or she’d die, but now that he was here she felt drained, the giddy, terrified adrenaline that’d been keeping her going evaporating in an instant.

Though hey. At least she had a good reason to be tired, for once.

He frowned at her discarded supplies strewn carelessly around the room. “Are these from Art Camp?”

The question jolted her into action, and she stumbled forward jerkily, like the Tin Man without oil. “Yeah, but I already took it out of my paycheck, it’s fine. I’ll go shopping tomorrow for new stuff.” She wanted him to hear what she really meant, what she was trying to put together through exhausted babbling: that this was important, that it was worth sacrificing sleep and money for, that she loved him and she respected him and she wanted him to know that.

Finally, finally, he turned his attention to the walls. “Gwen, what is all this?”

“It’s you,” she blurted out, then winced and rested her forehead in her palm. “No, that’s not — it’s — some of the stuff you’ve taught me, look . . .” She took his hand, her nerves trembling at the brush of his fingers against her own, and pulled him toward the doorway. She’d made a messy semicircle around the room, right to left like a supermarket. Dropping his hand, she took a step back, steepling her fingers like she was praying and pressing them to her lips with another steadying breath.

She had one chance.

“Okay,” she began. “So . . .”

---

Gwen looked like she was on the verge of falling over, listing dangerously to the side as she led him across the room. There were feathers in her hair, and scraps of paper; she was speckled with color, marker and paint and even a smear of glitter glue on the tip of her nose, the pads of her fingers nearly black with a rainbow of ink that stained his hand as she held it. It was obvious she hadn’t slept, even more obvious that she desperately needed to.

But her eyes were bright even if the circles under them were dark, and she thrummed with an energy and animation David hadn’t seen all summer.

And he couldn’t bring himself to interrupt her, not when it finally felt like she’d returned to him.

“— song you taught me last year,” she said, and he felt a flash of guilt that he hadn’t been listening. She tapped the paper she’d stuck to the wall, the lyrics of his Camp Campbell song scrawled across it in uneven lines. “All the camp activities, remember? At least the most important ones.”

(It was really just the ones that fit best into the rhyme scheme, but he didn’t correct her as she moved on to a second piece of paper.)

“This is a list of all the facts about nature I’ve learned since I started here,” she continued, gesturing. This one was crammed so tightly with writing that he could barely read it, bullet points snaking in all directions and increasingly smaller handwriting as it moved down the page, until finally Gwen had started attaching sticky notes to the wall below and around the list. “I had to keep going back and adding things as I thought of them. I know I’m forgetting something, but I can’t —” She gestured around her head in a classic “scatterbrained” motion, chuckling weakly. “I’m kind of all over the place right now.”

Next: a bullseye, a pencil stuck point-first into the wall. “I couldn’t really shoot an arrow,” Gwen explained, “but remember that summer you taught me archery? I’m still pretty good at it — we went to a shooting range for Claire’s birthday last year and I was the only one who hit the target every time.”

Next: a messy drawing of a forest, a little stick figure kneeling next to a moss-covered rock. “That one time we got lost in the woods trying to find a good place for bug-catching, you got us out because you knew how to find north. You’d be pretty great in a zombie apocalypse.”

Next: a sheet of black construction paper poked through with holes, hastily taped to the back window so light from the lamp outside shone through in little pinpricks. He leaned closer and realized that they were in the rough shape of the constellations visible above Lake Lilac. “I didn't know much about stars and shit outside of, like, horoscope stuff — I mean, in the city you can’t even see them — but you always pointed out which constellations and planets were out during the summer and now I know them all too.”

And on, and on. Scale models of the crafts and activities they’d done at Camp Campbell, nature facts, and on one wall she’d tacked up a typewritten letter to the Director of Admissions at Queen’s University Belfast. Skimming it quickly, it looked to David like an application.

“I was trying to get into their Environmental Science program. I wrote about Sleepy Peak Peak and Lake Lilac,” she admitted, looking almost embarrassed. “I got in. And I mean, they’re not the best program out there, but they’re still in the top 300 worldwide so that’s pretty cool, I guess —”

“Belfast?” He leaned in closer, confirming that he’d read correctly. “Isn’t that in England?”

“Yeah.” She looked impressed, and he suppressed a weary smirk; yes, he did know a bit about the world outside of Camp Campbell. But she surprised him by adding, “I had to look that up, actually.” She shrugged. “Guess I should’ve just asked you, huh?

“Anyway, that was a couple years ago. I didn’t go, obviously,” she added, responding to his unspoken question. “International travel’s a bitch. I needed a scholarship, and my grades weren’t good enough. I think I only got in at all because of my letter.” She gestured at it, not quite meeting his eyes. “Which I never thanked you for. Or most of the stuff I’ve learned from you. I’ve been . . . kinda taking all that for granted. So, uh . . . thanks, David.”

He wanted to tell her she was welcome, that she didn’t need to thank him at all. That sharing these things with her had been the highlight of his life since they’d met, even if it hadn’t seemed like she cared about any of it. But there was a lump quivering dangerously in his throat and he didn’t trust himself to speak, so he just nodded.

After a second she cleared her throat awkwardly and led him over to a row of stick figures hanging from the ceiling. “Some of these are from Yoga Camp,” she said, pointing at a few of the ones contorted into uncomfortable shapes, “but also all that other stuff you do. Like smile exercises —” and yes, one of the stick figures had a big pink smiley face, “— and breathing techniques and stuff. I use those sometimes when I’m having a panic attack. They really help, even if smile exercises still make me feel like a dumbass most of the time.”

The decorations started to get more abstract as they made their way around the room, simple crafts and trivia giving way to colorful scribbles and symbols, representing things he’d said to her about her relationship with her parents, her love life. “You have really good advice, you know that? You could be the next Dear Abby or something, seriously. I think that’s still running.”

(It was; he read it every morning with his pre-breakfast tea.)

“These get worse, sorry . . . I was getting tired.” Gwen jerked her chin up at a wobbly butterfly — or was it a bird? — dangling over their heads. “I use your advice about hummingbird-ing all the time. With writing, mostly, but sometimes at work or something, too.”

He gently reached up and touched the bird’s feet, watching it spin in a lazy circle. Technically the idea had been his mother’s, a way to avoid burnout by flitting from one project to another and adding just a little bit to each, instead of devoting all energy and resources to one thing and slogging through until it was done. The whole idea was part of his ethos of being a counselor — wasn’t Camp Campbell a place to get a little taste of everything, after all? He remembered explaining it to Gwen during her first week at camp, just over five years ago.

He wouldn’t have ever imagined that she’d actually remembered.

He didn’t think she remembered any of this.

But the evidence was all around him — on the walls, hanging from the ceiling, dozens of examples, mementos of the tiny moments that meant everything to him. Immortalized, remembered, in increasingly sloppy handwriting and doodles.

In the corner was a bright red card that looked familiar. David moved over to it and laughed in recognition: it was one he’d sent her after her first or second summer at Camp Campbell, when he’d seen on Facebook that she was looking for work. He tugged it off the wall, careful not to damage the cheap cardstock, and smiled down at the deer wearing a plaid hunting cap, which he’d made out of tissue paper and markers (he’d gotten much better since then, thanks to a few years of Decoupage Camps).

‘Good luck on your job HUNT! I know you’ll slay the interview!’

“I’ve kept that for years to show my friends,” Gwen said, making him jump; he hadn’t realized she’d come up behind him, but she was close enough to nearly rest her head against his. “I felt like it really captured the kind of guy you were.”

Her breath prickled the side of his neck, and he distracted himself by opening the card — ‘oh deer, is this joke going on too long? I feel like it’s overkill!’ — noticing how worn the crease was, like she’d opened and closed it hundreds of times. “Does it?”

He felt her shake her head without having to face her, stray wisps of hair that’d escaped her ponytail tickling his cheek. “Not even close.”

Unable to resist, he looked back at her over his shoulder, and she took his arm, turning him around the rest of the way. He thought she was going to kiss him — she was close enough that he could see a smeary glue thumbprint on her cheek and what looked like half a smiley-face sticker in her hair — but she just took the card from him, setting it carefully on the couch before taking hold of both his hands. Her expression was grave, shining faint with hope, and between the craft debris and her naked earnestness, she looked incredibly young and vulnerable.

“There’s more,” she said, gesturing with her chin toward the far wall, “and I’ll let — I want you to look at it, but . . . I just had to tell you, I’ve been taking you for granted and it’s not right. I’ve been pretending I still think of you as this —” Pulling one of her hands away, she picked up the card again, her fingers shaking so the deer’s toothpick antlers clacked together, “— sweet, silly, kinda childish David, who belongs with someone sweet, and silly, and kinda childish. And I tried to be that and . . . I mean I sucked at it,” she said, breaking off with a weak laugh, dropping her eyes to their joined hands. “And it . . . kind of broke me. But I didn’t even think to ask if that was what you wanted, because I thought I knew what you needed, and that was — so, really fucked.” She looked back up at him, her eyes dancing with purple fire, her grip on his hand tightening. “And I — I don’t, you know so much that I don’t — I could fill the entire cabin with stuff I’ve learned from you, this doesn’t even scratch the surface.”

She paused, like she was waiting for him to interject, but David felt like he’d been turned to stone, paralyzed and unblinking while his brain whirled.

“But none of it matters if it doesn’t show . . . if you don’t know —” Her voice cracked, and she dropped his other hand, pressing a fist to her mouth. “— h-how amazing you are, how much you matter to this camp and to me and . . . and I didn’t know people could actually be happy 'til I met you. I mean, I guess I knew technically, but not that it was a real thing people actually were. But you figured it out. You’ve known what you wanted since you were a kid and then you got it and I’ve never done anything without second-guessing myself a million times but you just did it, and it meant making so many decisions about your life that could’ve turned out wrong but they didn’t because they were the right ones for you. And you knew it. You always have.” She swiped at her eyes with the heels of her hands, crying in earnest now. “You’re a marvel, David. I should’ve said that every fucking day. And I know it’s probably too little, too late, but I’m sorry. For not telling you and — and for everything.

“And I . . .” She swallowed hard, taking a few heaving breaths before continuing, and he knew she was trying to hold onto her composure even as tears poured down her cheeks, “I don’t know what you wanna do. With — with us, I mean. But you’re right, I haven’t been a good girlfriend to you, and if you don’t want to . . . if you want me to leave right now or after the summer ends or if you just wanna be friends or whatever , that’s fine. A-and — if you do . . . y’know . . .” Her face crumpled, her shoulders curling in on themselves. “I love you so much,” she managed, her words harder to make out through damp, hiccuping breaths. “Whatever — whatever you want — I — I — I trust you.”

Understanding pierced his chest, a small pinhole that allowed light to pour, warm and white, into his heart.

“I trust you.”

David hadn’t realized how desperately he’d needed to hear those words until that moment.

He stepped forward, plucking the card from her hand and tossing it onto the floor (he could make her another one, dozens if she wanted, hundreds) and tilting her chin up so he could kiss her. Her cheeks were wet under his palms, her mouth salty and acidic with the taste of not-quite-morning breath, and each brush of his lips against hers was broken by her pulling back to drag in a sobbing gasp, her mouth moving clumsily like she was as close to fainting from exhaustion and emotion as she looked.

It was, without question, the best kiss of his life.

He broke away to press his forehead against hers, sliding his hands from her face to cup the back of her neck and closing his eyes. “I love you too, Gwen,” he murmured, his heart fluttering at the giddily-incredulous, teary laugh she gave in response. “And I think you need to go to bed.”

She leaned back, and the bleary confusion on her face was so precious he rose up on his toes to press a soft kiss to her forehead. “Huh? But what about . . .”

“I’ve got some stuff to think about,” he said, then gestured at the crafts she hadn’t shown him yet, “and look at. And after that . . . we should talk. But it won’t be a very good talk if you fall asleep,” he added with a laugh as her eyes drifted closed.

She opened them halfway, just enough to glare at him, but the effect would’ve been more intimidating if she hadn’t been swaying slightly. “’m fine.” The adrenaline that’d been keeping her going was clearly wearing off fast, and David was a little worried she wouldn’t make it to bed, that he’d just find her unconscious on the floor of the hallway. “You didn’t sleep either,” she accused, pointing at him with a finger stained silvery with graphite.

Goodness, he loved her so much he couldn’t stand it. “I had a nap.” Not a long one, but he was used to not sleeping much. “Get some rest. We’ll talk in the morning.”

“It’s already the morning,” she complained, but like a sleepy robot she turned and shuffled back toward the front of the cabin. “I’m gonna brush my teeth and shower and stuff. So I look less like a sludge goblin.”

“You do that, Gwen.” He waited until the bathroom door had clicked shut before turning back to the mess she’d made of their living room. It was almost hard to tell the difference between what was art and what was trash left over, there was so much of both; it looked like an explosion had hit a crafts store.

Gwen wasn’t someone who put a lot of effort into things she didn’t care about. It was one of the most frustrating things about having her as a coworker, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t love how unabashedly honest she was, how he could read her feelings just by looking at her work.

There was the soft sound of tape unsticking and one of the decorations sagged, a corner curling away from the wall and drooping down. He pushed it carefully back into place and fumbled for his phone, setting it to camera mode.

This was worth remembering.

---

Gwen was positive she’d never be able to fall asleep; how could she, when things were still so up in the air? But she wasn’t twenty anymore, and after the exhaustion and emotional turmoil of the last few hours — days, weeks; hell, if she was being honest it’d been years since she’d truly felt well-rested — and despite the anxiety buzzing inside her skull she was out in moments.

Soft fingers in her hair drew her back to earth, and when she opened her eyes David came into focus, crouching next to her bed so they were at eye level. He smiled as she blinked at him, warmth and sunshine he probably didn’t even know he was emitting. “Goooood morning, Gwen!” he chirped, his voice way too loud for how close they were, and she winced. “Sorry,” he added, his voice dropping to a murmur. “Habit.”

“It’s fine,” she said, because she’d missed his morning bellow so much more than she could ever miss having non-punctured eardrums. She sat up, clumsily swiping at her face to double-check for drool or errant eye gunk. “Morning.”

“How are you feeling?” He hopped onto the bed, making her and everything else on the mattress bounce. He was being so . . . normal, like all the drama last night had been a dream.

Fuck it. They had some hard, painful conversations coming; she could enjoy a little bit of normalcy while her brain booted back up. “Good,” she replied, yawning. “I mean, tired, but I’m always tired so —” Her blood chilled, and suddenly she was wide awake.

There went normal. All because she had to remind him of what an unloveable disaster she was.

But when she looked back up he didn’t seem annoyed. He leaned against the wall, stretching his legs out so they dangled off the edge of the bed. “It’s okay. I don’t mind.” She scoffed before she could stop herself, and his gaze flicked up to hers, taking her breath away. (God, how she’d functioned for almost four years without feeling more than a flicker of attraction to this man was unfathomable.) “Really. I want to know what’s going on with you.” His hand landed on her knee, light as a bird but blazingly warm even through her blankets. “All I want is for you to let me in.”

A swell of emotion swept up from somewhere in her chest, causing her eyes to prick with tears for the thousandth time. She looked away and sniffed as discreetly as possible — which wasn’t very, she assumed, since he immediately reached over and handed her a tissue from the pack he kept stashed in his pockets. “I mean, if you want me to complain, I can do that,” she muttered, tamping down another flow of tears through willpower. “I can complain about fucking anything.”

David’s laugh made her turn back toward him, because it didn’t have a trace of sadness or pity or anything she’d expected. It was so purely, entirely delighted , more than even he could fake, and he was looking at her like she’d said something surprising and wonderful.

“You really like it,” she blurted out, unable to hide the awe in her voice. “That I’m like this. Whiny and —” she waved vaguely “— bitchy, and whatever.”

“I don’t.” He shook his head and her stomach plummeted. But as she took a breath to respond he shifted closer, gently cupping the back of her neck so he could tap his forehead against hers. “I love it, Gwen. I love everything about you.”

A laugh burbled out of her before she could stop it, and she pulled away to hide her face. “Oh my god. You bastard. You’re so cheesy.”

His fingers closed around her wrists, tugging her palms away from her face. “I love you,” he said, kissing the skin she’d covered with her hands — the tip of her nose, each cheek, her top and bottom lip, her eyebrows.

“I love you, too.” She could already tell that if he was going to keep saying that to her she’d spontaneously combust, because this was all too cute and romantic and lovely and she still didn’t fully understand how this was happening, why he didn’t hate her.

But she’d promised she wouldn’t question his decision, whatever it was. She owed him that much.

His smile faded slightly, a faint line appearing between his eyebrows. “What’re you thinking?”

“Nothing,” she lied automatically, and when that only made him sigh she added, “I said I was going to trust you,” hating the note of defensiveness in her voice, because of the two of them she didn’t have much grounds for righteous indignation.

“Then trust me with how you feel.” It should’ve sounded too much like a cliche, something she’d tease him for, but he was right and they both knew it.

She’d put him through hell by not telling him the truth, and they both knew that, too.

Gwen closed her eyes, taking a deep breath and forcing herself to relax. Things were — they seemed okay, didn’t they? Almost normal, but better, because all her ugliness was out there for him to see and he knew about it and he didn’t seem to mind. And wasn’t that something she’d never thought she’d ever actually find? “I don’t get it,” she admitted, her voice sounding small and stupid. “I keep feeling like . . . like I tricked you somehow. Like I didn’t explain well enough why you shouldn’t want me, because if you really got it you wouldn’t be here. Not because I think you’re stupid,” she added quickly, desperately, “because I don’t, really! But — but even smart people can be . . . I don’t know, manipulated?”

The confusion in her voice made her pause, sit back. Manipulated? That couldn’t be right, could it? She wasn’t trying to manipulate anyone, and she was pretty sure you couldn’t manipulate someone by accident.

Or maybe you could; she hadn’t always paid a ton of attention to her psych classes in college.

“I’m sorry,” she managed after a few deeply uncomfortable moments of silence. “I’m trying, I promise, but I understand if . . . you know. Whatever.” (She still hated saying it, especially now that it seemed like it might not happen. Breaking up with David was hard enough without having to say it.)

He put his arm around her shoulders, tugging her into his side and kissing her temple. “Thank you for telling me, Gwen.”

“You’re not mad?”

She felt him shake his head as she rested hers on his shoulder, scooting down to make up for their (lack of) height difference. “I wasn’t really mad when I came back this morning,” he said, “even before I saw everything you’d made. I had some time to cool down, and I . . . started thinking, I guess.”

Gwen wanted to look up at him, but she wanted to soak in his warmth more so she nuzzled into the curve of his neck, inhaling the smells of floral detergent and piney-woodsy cologne left over from the day before. “About what?” she asked, like there could possibly be more than one answer. Like maybe he’d been pondering the sociopolitics of Malaysia or something.

He let out a little huff of laughter, and she knew without looking that he’d glanced up at the ceiling in a slow blink (that he insisted was less rude than rolling his eyes outright, even though it was just as obvious). “You. Everything that’s happened this summer — and before it.” His shoulder shifted slightly under her cheek, a shrug aborted halfway through so she’d be comfortable. “Things started making more sense after everything we talked about tonight. Like the day we . . . well, when you told me about that gentleman you . . . almost took home.”

“He wasn’t a gentleman, he was a douchebag,” she interrupted, immediately feeling like an asshole. But David chuckled and squeezed her closer, like he enjoyed her company even when she was being annoying (which he did; somehow he actually did) and she let herself relax against his side, believe that maybe things were going to be okay after all.

“I’ve thought about the stuff you said a lot since that day. Mostly the parts that made me feel the worst.”

She flinched. “I’m so sorry —” she began, but he cut her off with a kiss to her forehead.

“I have trouble with . . . rejection,” he continued, sounding embarrassed. Like that minor character flaw even came close to the millions of ways she was fucked up. “I — I guess you could call it ‘abandonment issues’? But at first, and for a while, all I could hear were the ways you didn’t . . . seem to want me around anymore.”

“But I did —”

“I know.” Another soft kiss, and she wasn’t sure if it was to reassure her or himself. “I know that now. And I think, knowing that . . . it made what you said sound different.

“You were drunk — I know, you downplayed it, and it wouldn’t have excused . . . but your judgment was still impaired. And you didn’t kiss him. Thinking back, it didn’t even sound like you really wanted to. Did you?” She shook her head, not willing to look up at him because no matter how gently he tried to frame this she still felt like it was her fault. “And I just couldn’t stop thinking, how if this had happened a few years ago you would’ve told that story so much differently. If we were still just friends, maybe. You would’ve stormed into the cabin raging about how some jerk had ‘put his mitts all over you’ —”

Gwen couldn’t help it; she burst out laughing, pushing away from him and resting her head in her hands. “That can’t be how you think I talk!”

“It was an edited version,” he admitted, flushing. His smile was wide enough to illuminate the room, catching and refracting the dreary dawn light. “Please come back?”

She snuggled into his outstretched arms, her heart panging at the plaintive note in his voice. She wrapped herself around him, legs entangled with his and arms squeezing his waist; she’d missed him just as much. “Your impression of me is really bad,” she said with an uncontrollable giggle that made her feel like she was fourteen.

“I’ll work on it.” For a moment he just held her, soaking in the relief of being together and being okay. (At least, that's what she was doing.) “Why did it bother you so much?” he asked after a minute or so. “It doesn’t . . . well, it just doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong.”

“I guess — yeah, maybe not, technically anyway. But you’d just visited and saw how terrible my life is, and I was having an even harder time being a less-shitty version of myself . . .” He made a soft noise, almost pained, and pulled her closer. “So when this asshole showed up and was, like, exactly the type of guy I usually go for, it felt like . . . I don’t know. Like the universe was telling me we didn’t belong together. That sounds stupid. Never mind.” She pressed her face against his chest with an embarrassed groan. “Pretend I said something that doesn’t make me sound like I write horoscopes for a living.”

“I like horoscopes!” he replied, because of course he did. After a moment he added, “Thank you for telling me. It . . . helps confirm some things I was thinking earlier, when I left. Because what you said, and what you’ve been saying for a long time . . . I’ve been hearing it the way that’d hurt me the most, but I think you meant it to make me hate you.” He paused for a second, then added, “Do you think I’m right?”

Gwen shrugged, feeling more than a little like one of his campers receiving an aggressively pacifist talking-to. “Yeah. I don’t . . . like myself all that much.”

“I’ve noticed.” And David pressed another kiss to the top of her head, like he was rewarding her for being honest. Or like he just couldn’t help himself. “You haven’t treated me very well lately, Gwen. And I was — am very unhappy about that. But I don’t think it holds a candle to how you treat yourself.”

She wriggled away enough to sit up and look at him, frowning. “So you’re, what? Willing to come back to a shitty relationship because you feel sorrier for me than for you?” she demanded, even though it would’ve been smarter to just not say anything and enjoy his pity while she still had it.

But again, she said she’d be honest. And the true Gwen was kind of a bitch.

His smile turned sad, and he carefully tucked a flyaway hair behind her ear. “See, that’s what I mean. You never give yourself the benefit of the doubt.” When she frowned, not understanding, he took her hand and began playing with it, wiggling her fingers and twining them with his. “I understand better, now. How you’re feeling and what you’re thinking. And I’m not going to let you treat me like I’m a kid, or — or stupid, or whatever. I know you don’t really think that,” he added as she opened her mouth to argue. “There’s a whole cabin’s worth of proof in the living room that you don’t really think that. That’s why I wanna try again. Miscommunications, misunderstandings . . . those are fixable. And now that I know what’s been going through your head, I don’t think you’ve done anything I can’t forgive.”

Her eyes filled with tears — again, and she was going to die of dehydration if she didn’t get ahold of herself — but this time she couldn’t resent them too much, not when it felt like she was brimming over with hope that was eager to burst free. “What’re you saying, David?”

He shifted back, turning so he was sitting cross-legged facing her, and took both her hands in his. “I keep . . . trying to find a way to say it,” he admitted, looking down at their twined fingers and flushing pink, “because ‘do you want to be my girlfriend again?’ is maybe too middle-school, but ‘dating’ sounds too casual, and —”

Gwen pulled out of his grasp and closed the distance between them, straddling his lap and taking his chin in one hand. His face lifted toward her before his eyes did, darting from her chest to over her shoulder before finally meeting her gaze. She wound her free arm around his shoulders, sliding her fingers into the short, soft hair at the nape of his neck. With the hand cupping his jaw she gently swiped her thumb across his lower lip, slightly chapped but still warm and softer than it looked, each breath skating across her skin feather-light and making her skin prickle. “Yeah,” she said, closing her eyes and pressing her forehead to his, holding back a laugh — or maybe a sob, she wasn’t quite sure; the emotions roiling inside her were too much to separate between happy and sad. “Whatever you’re asking, yes, I want it.”

She felt his smile spread under her thumb before he brushed her hand away, tilting his head so he could kiss her. “Good,” he murmured with a breathless chuckle, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her closer. “I mean, I was pretty sure you’d say that, but still — that’s a relief.”

She laughed, shaking her head. “You idiot.” Her blood turned to ice, and she pulled away from him, stricken. For fuck’s sake, couldn’t she be anything but herself for five minutes? “I didn’t mean — !”

David smiled, far more fondly than she deserved. “I know, Gwen.”

Groaning, she buried her face in his shoulder. “I’m trying, really I am.”

“Don’t.” He put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her back until she was upright, looking down at him again. “Please don’t try so hard to be what you think I want. Just be you.”

“Right.” She forced her shoulders to relax, tilting her head back and rolling her neck until it cracked. “I’m . . . gonna have a hard time with that. ‘Just me’ is kind of the worst.”

“I know you think that,” he said, pressing his half-open mouth to the hollow of her collarbone and making her shiver. “And I’ll keep reminding you until you don’t think it anymore.”

She managed a weak chuckle, leaning into his lips as he moved up her neck. “Good luck with that.”

His answering laugh rolled over her skin, warm and teasing. “Haven’t you heard, Gwen? I like projects.”

Jesus. Grabbing a fistful of his hair, she tugged him upright, taking a moment to appreciate his gasp that wasn’t just surprise. “I love you,” she said, loosening her grip and kissing his forehead, petting away the furrows her fingers left in his fluffy red hair.

His expression softened. “I love —” he began, and Gwen tightened her hold on his hair and pulled back, just so she could watch his eyes flutter shut and his breath catch, “— y-you too.”

Dragging her palm down the side of his neck, she settled her thumb on his throat, feeling his pulse flutter rapidly, and bent to kiss him again. She hadn’t necessarily meant to turn it into anything, just wanted to feel his lips against hers, but her fingers tightened involuntarily in his hair and he moaned, and it was a lit match dropped down her throat to a stomach full of gasoline, a whoosh of heat blazing to life in the pit of her belly. “David,” she breathed, not so much because she had anything to say but because she needed to say it, to roll the sound of his name around in her mouth, let it melt like chocolate on her tongue and infuse her whole body with sweetness.

“Gwen,” he said, and she thought he was doing the same thing, saying her name just because he could, but then his hands were on her shoulders and he was pushing her away, gentle but firm. “Gwen, wait, we should — talk about this —”

“Oh, shit, yeah. Okay. Sorry.” She sat back, her face warming. But as she settled her weight more firmly in his lap he jolted; and if she’d thought she was embarrassed it was nothing to the way his already-flushed cheeks flamed pink, spreading in blotches up to his hairline and the tips of his ears, down to disappear underneath his bandana. He stammered out an apology, avoiding her eyes even as his cock twitched, like bashfulness could disguise how hard he was against her. She quickly rose back up — the last thing she wanted was to make him feel ashamed, or pressured; everything between them was as tremulous and new as the first time — but realized almost instantly when David squeaked that this just shoved her chest in his face.

She hovered there for an awkward second, the two of them staring at each other in mortified horror. Then his whole expression wavered, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth before quickly flattening into a thin line, and the break in his composure took hers out too. She snorted, and they both burst out laughing. “I’ll just sit over here,” she said through giggles, rolling off his lap and settling on the other side of the bed with her feet curled under her so they were no longer touching. He made a small sad sound like a squeeze toy deflating, and Gwen rolled her eyes and stretched out one leg until her foot brushed his knee. “Here, hold my foot if you’re that lonely. It’s practically holding hands.”

His eyes widened, hands closing around her ankle and setting it on his thigh with something like reverence. “Thank you,” he murmured, gently tracing the outline of her foot with his fingertips. “That was very sweet, you know.”

God, she was blushing, wasn’t she? She had to be. “Yeah,” she agreed, trying to ignore the ticklish feeling as he kept playing with her foot like it was a toy doll. “Felt weird, too. I kinda wanted to insult you or something, just to balance it out.”

He smiled, wiggling her big toe like he was playing that little piggies game she used to do with her nieces when they were babies. “That’s my Gwen.” And he sounded pleased, almost proud, like she’d done something wonderful.

But that was David; even though sometimes he was completely oblivious, sometimes he noticed and appreciated the tiniest, most inconsequential things. That’s my David, she thought, her heart swelling like it was going to burst. “You wanted to talk about something?” she reminded him, waggling her toes to get his attention.

“Oh! Right.” He gently took her foot and set it on the bed next to him, grabbing a pillow and hugging it to his chest. “Sorry, I was getting distracted, and that was the whole point of you moving over there.” (He said it with a pout, like she’d gone to Spain instead of just out of arms’ reach.)

“I thought the whole point of me moving over here was so you could cool down, tiger,” she teased. But when he didn’t respond except to flush darker, his gaze firmly on a fraying edge of the pillowcase in his arms, something weird and hilarious clicked in her head. “Oh my god, are you into feet?”

“No!” He lifted his head to give her a tragically betrayed expression. “Not a weird amount!”

She grinned, poking his thigh with her outstretched foot. “What’s a weird amount?” she asked.

He shrugged, not quite able to maintain the kicked-puppy look when a smile kept trying to break through. “I don’t know. Watching people in heels step on fruit. I don’t like that sort of thing, I’ll have you know,” he added defensively, and for a second Gwen was sure he’d stick his tongue out at her.

“Sure, but you’re into them enough to know those videos exist.”

“I think I’d like to go back to you being nice to me,” he muttered, and she felt a stab of panic before he gently patted her ankle and met her gaze with a slight smile. Like he knew what she was thinking.

So she shoved past her nervousness and said, “But I thought you wanted me to be myself. And as myself, I can’t believe you never told me you were a foot guy!”

“I’m a you guy. And . . . you know. All of you. You’re perfect.”

“Yeah, but the feet are a thing, huh? At least a little bit.” When he didn’t answer she laughed, shaking her head. “So do you, like, want a footjob or something?”

“I really don’t.”

“How have we been dating this long and I didn’t know about this? What other freaky sex things are you hiding?”

“Nothing!” he said, hugging the pillow tighter. After a moment he looked away and added, “I didn’t want you to think I was weird.”

“David.” She leaned forward, waiting for him to look at her and see in her expression just how ridiculous that was. “You can’t get weirder than I am. You know that.” When the color in his face receded just a little bit, and his eyes flicked back toward her hopefully, she sighed and attempted to dredge up one of the strangest kinks in her vast library. “I’d totally fuck Drogon.”

He frowned thoughtfully. “From Game of Thrones? So would I- Iiiiiii mean, s-so would most people.”

“No, not Khal Drogo, Drogon. The dragon. Not like a humanized version, either — just full lizard.”

“Oh.” He smiled a little, almost a smirk, and Gwen felt distinctly, lovingly judged. “That does make me feel better. Thank you.”

“No problem. And tomorrow I’m gonna go into town and get a pedicure, just for you.” She wiggled her toes at him, grinning. “I’m thinking something slutty, like hot pink.”

“Gwen!” He shoved her foot away, laughing. “I was trying to have a serious conversation before you started talking about — about slutty toes and dragons!”

She cracked up too, falling over onto her side and nearly toppling off the bed. “Slutty toes,” she repeated breathlessly, and it took a few minutes to recover; every time they tried to make eye contact they burst out laughing again.

“Okay, okay.” Gwen finally sat back up, trying in vain to smooth her hair out of its mass of tangled bedhead. “I’m sorry, you were trying to say something serious. What’s up?”

“Right.” He took a deep breath, fingers knotting in her blankets until his knuckles were white. “It’s just . . . it was starting to seem like we were going to — um, you know. Be intimate.”

She resisted the urge to tease him for his word choice. “I was open to it, yeah.”

“M-me too! That’s why . . . well. Okay.” He took a deep breath, dragging his hands down his face, and Gwen noticed for the first time how tired he looked.

“Hey, we don’t have to do anything,” she said, shifting closer so she could put her hand on his shoulder. “You know that, right?”

He nodded, patting her hand before brushing it away so she didn’t feel rejected, and once again she felt a rush of love so intense it almost brought tears to her eyes. He could be so simply, effortlessly kind, without even thinking about it. “I do. At least, I think I do. I- I mean, I know I do, but it’s hard to . . .” He waved his hand around his head like his thoughts were scattering birds.

“The night before we . . . well. Ended things.” He flinched at his own words, and she felt the same pain flicker over the surface of her heart.

It’s okay, she reminded herself, wishing she could sweep him up in her arms and block out all the bad memories she’d put there. It still hurts, but we’re going to be okay.

Like he’d been thinking the same thing, David stretched out his hand to find hers, squeezing her fingers. “I said I didn’t want to,” he continued in a rush, “you know. Be together like that. And you . . . seemed to get mad — at me. And then the next day you broke up with me.” He squeezed his eyes shut, taking a shuddering breath that had tears behind it, and she tightened her grip on his hand. “It’s okay,” he said, opening his eyes and giving her a slightly-watery smile. “I’m okay. But I just need to know . . .”

“God, no,” she jumped in, taking up the thread of his question as it trailed off into nothingness. “David, no, it had nothing to do with — I freaked out, but I was already — I mean, I was gonna fall apart over anything, it didn’t have to be that. You didn’t do anything wrong, I promise.” She couldn’t stand it anymore, so she pulled his hand to her lips, kissing his knuckles because she wanted to respect his need for space but she had to touch him or she was going to die.

He swallowed, watching their joined hands for a moment before looking away. “You — that really hurt me, Gwen. I just needed to tell you that.”

All the anger he’d thrown at her in the past several hours, all the pain and frustration, and it was those small, matter-of-fact words that slashed her heart in two. “I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”

She hated apologizing — it always felt weak, or dangerous, or something. Like it was an opening for someone to hate her even more, like she was handing them a weapon to hold over her head for the rest of her life. (It was why she hated receiving them, too; she could be spiteful and vindictive as anyone, but it was uncomfortable watching someone flay themselves in front of her.)

But with David . . . it didn’t feel like she was giving him leverage when she told him she was sorry. She wasn’t scared he’d hold onto it and throw it back in her face someday. She wasn’t resentful of him, and she wasn’t worried about how he’d react.

She wasn’t anything but truly, genuinely sorry.

And he didn’t brush it aside, act like she had no reason to apologize the way she’d half-expected. Either she hadn’t been giving him enough credit, or he’d grown up while she wasn’t paying attention. Maybe a little of both. But whatever the cause, he just stroked her cheek with the backs of his knuckles and nodded, a ghost of his smile returning for a second. “It’s okay,” he said, looking at her like she was — god, like he loved her. “Hearing it helps.”

She wasn’t sure if he needed more than that, but she wasn’t going to let a single doubt linger in his mind. “Seriously, David, you can — I won’t ever be mad at you for saying no, ever. For any reason, or no reason or . . . whatever. It’s okay. It’ll always be okay.”

“I — um, I had a reason.” He spoke fast, his eyes wide like he’d surprised himself. Still, he pressed his lips together into a flat line and met her gaze, clearly nervous but just as clearly not intending to end the conversation until they’d said everything they needed to. He was so brave. “I should’ve mentioned it at the time, but I guess I was scared.”

Gwen snorted, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, I can relate to that.”

He rewarded her with a small, soft smile before continuing, “The thing is, everything had just been so gosh-darned strange between us, and it felt like you were avoiding me all the time — except when we were together like that.” He scratched the back of his neck, looking embarrassed. “It sounds silly, but I couldn’t help but worry that maybe that was . . . all you were interested in me for.”

Her stomach sank. “And then when you said no, and I freaked . . .”

David nodded, his throat moving as he swallowed again. “Yeah,” he murmured, looking away. “It — it sure felt like you only wanted me for that one thing, all of a sudden, and when you couldn’t get it . . .”

“I dumped you,” she finished, covering her mouth in horror. “Oh, David.”

“I was a little nervous to tell you to stop.” He pulled his hands from hers so he could fidget, twisting his long fingers together. “Earlier — just now. A minute ago. So we could talk. I — I know it wasn’t fair, but I couldn’t stop thinking you might get mad at me again.”

“I wasn’t mad,” she replied, her hands shaking with how badly she wanted to hug him. (And god, what a change from their normal paradigm, that she was the one who had to hold herself back from a hug.) “I mean, I was, but never at you. I was mad at me, for screwing things up. I — you’re right, I was avoiding you, or avoiding talking to you, I guess. Because I didn’t know how to talk to you, how to act so you wouldn’t find out that I’m . . .” Her throat closed, thick and gummy with tears, and she took a deep breath and swallowed them back. “Rotten,” she finished, which was a stupid, melodramatic word but it felt right; it described the way she still felt despite everything, squishy and overripe and putrid. “It was getting harder to hide, once we were together all the time. And when we were fucking —” She couldn’t tiptoe around the words like David, not when she could just say it and watch him flush red. Even her rotted heart skipped a beat whenever he smiled. “It felt like I didn’t have to try so hard. I couldn’t be amazing, but I could make you feel amazing. And if I could do that . . .” She sniffed, looking away and wiping her face clean. “I thought I was letting you know how much you mean to me,” she admitted, the realization coming right on the heels of the words. “I mean, obviously I wasn’t — add that to the list of things I suck at — but when you didn’t want to have sex, it . . . I took it really hard.”

Her face was turned away, so his hand on her shoulder made her jump. “It felt like I was rejecting the only thing you had to offer,” he guessed, his voice soft and sad but no longer on the verge of tears. “Gwen . . .”

“It’s fine,” she said, shaking her head like she could rattle her self-pity out of her head. “That was just me being stupid, I know that. More importantly — seriously.” She looked back at him, at his beautiful open face, at the way he was watching her like she could possibly have something to say that mattered. “It’s never been about sex with you, David,” she said. Felt the encroaching tears yet again and decided to ignore them. If they came, they came; they weren’t going to stop her, because it was the most essential thing in the world that he knew, that he believed her. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, the sex is really good —” He chuckled, blushing exactly the way she’d hoped he would, and it gave her a little glowing spark of strength, “— but it doesn’t even come close to being what I love most about you. None of that stuff —” She gestured toward her bedroom door, and the mess of crafts cluttering their common room. “— comes close. It’s — everything, a billion other things I don’t know how to explain or describe or show you but I love you, so much, more than I’ve ever loved anyone and it scares me, and — I’m rambling. Sorry.” She shrank back, feeling like an idiot again. “I just wanted you to know that. It . . . we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, ever, and I’ll never be mad at you, or disappointed, or anything like that.”

“Thank you, Gwen.” He was quiet for a minute, and she felt the tension ratcheting up in her shoulders with each long, spiraling second. Part of her wanted to snap at him to just say something, finish the damn thought before he gave her a heart attack, but that was her anxiety and regret talking, and she never wanted to take her own issues out on him ever again.

(She probably would, considering what a mess she was. But she sure as hell wasn’t going to do it on purpose.)

“You’re right, though.” David’s voice was a surprise, as was the soft laugh accompanying his words. He was sitting with his head tilted back against the wall, looking up at the ceiling like he could see through it to the fading stars and brightening sky. His gaze dropped to meet hers, and he immediately looked down and away, biting his lip to try and hide a smile. “We are pretty darn great together.”

A massive weight dropped from Gwen’s chest, rolling away like a stone. “Yeah,” she agreed. Then, to test the waters: “I taught you well.”

It worked; he turned back toward her, his shyness replaced with half-serious indignation. “I like to think some of it was natural talent!”

“Ehh,” she teased, holding her hand out flat and seesawing it back and forth in a “so-so” motion. “Pretty sure enthusiasm was doing most of the heavy lifting in the beginning there.”

He crossed his arms over his chest with a disbelieving scoff. “Well, I never!”

She pressed her lips together to keep from giggling. What a dork. “Y’know, I should say we were insanely good. But I dunno, for all I know you’ve totally lost it.” Shaking her head mournfully, she quickly glanced over to make sure he wasn’t actually offended.

His mouth dropped open, his eyes growing wide before narrowing. “I haven’t lost anything!” he snapped, and — oh, the playful irritation in his voice made her stomach twist. Not in the awful sick way she’d been tied up in knots earlier, but with a flush of heat that took her breath away.

Managing a smirk, she laid back on her elbows, a warm glow of satisfaction blooming in her chest as his gaze dropped to her stomach, to the narrow strip of skin where her camisole had ridden up. She waited until he dragged his eyes back up to her, dark and intense like the ocean in a storm, then grinned at him.

“Wanna bet?”

His face lit up — or, not quite. Because his smile was bright and warm as sunshine, but underneath the tenderness was a sharp competitive edge that he almost never turned on her. It was almost intimidating, but the shiver it sent down her spine had nothing to do with fear. “Always,” he replied.

Before she could respond he’d pushed himself to his knees and grabbed her just above her calves; a quick tug forward and Gwen was pulled flat on her back, dragged down the bed until her body was sprawled out beneath him. He let go of her, bracing his hands on either side of her head and bending down to capture her mouth in a kiss.

She curled one hand around the back of his neck and pulled him closer, bending her knees so he was caged between her legs and arching her back to bring as much of her skin against his as possible. He was warm, almost uncomfortably so — her furnace, her own personal sun, and she wanted nothing more than to melt into him. When he abandoned her mouth in favor of trailing long, suckling kisses down her neck she pressed her lips together, biting hard on the inside of her cheek to keep from making a sound.

“You could’ve —” A gasp, too sudden for her to swallow it back, and she felt David’s satisfied smirk against the base of her throat as he bit down again. “— given me a concussion, you asshole.”

He hummed in assent, his lips skating up to her ear and his tongue lapping at the sensitive spot just behind it. “I know,” he said mildly, “but I didn’t.”

He gently took her earlobe between his teeth, and she couldn’t help the strangled noise that was somewhere between a moan and a sigh. Grabbing his hair again, she dragged his mouth back for another kiss, enjoying the shudder that rolled down his spine and made him tremble everywhere his body was touching hers. For a few dizzying minutes she held him there, barely allowing either of them to draw breath. His mouth was blood-hot, warmer than even her fevered skin, and she didn’t know exactly where she wanted it because she wanted it everywhere — against hers, his tongue lapping at the roof of her mouth and making her shiver; around one of her nipples, his teeth catching on the pebbled skin; sucking bruises into her inner thighs, closing around her clit, dipping inside her cunt, her asshole, along the sensitive strip of skin between the two. She wanted him to kiss her places that weren’t even close to erotic but she knew would burst into flame if he so much as brushed his lips over them: the bone jutting out from her ankle, the ticklish spot inside her elbow, wherever the fuck he wanted to press the gorgeous wet heat of his mouth she wanted to let him, because from the very first kiss he’d been good, better than he’d had any right to be but time and experience had worked their magic and now his mouth could ruin her; without even trying he could reduce her to twitching, shuddering goo.

“Take this off,” she gasped, not sure if she meant her clothes or his because she was wriggling out from under him and trying to remove both at the same time, her fingers clumsy and shaking with how badly she needed to touch him without any fabric in the way. She struggled to her knees, practically yanking her camisole off and throwing it across the room before hooking her fingers in his belt loops and dragging him close enough for her to undo the buckle. “Come on —”

“So I won?” He laughed breathlessly, untucking his shirt and pulling it over his head in one fluid motion, smugness making him unfairly graceful like he was trying to show off.

“Sure, whatever,” she muttered, because who cared about some bet when he was kneeling half-naked in front of her? They’d had silly, jokey sex but that was not this, not when he was so beautiful she was having trouble looking directly at him, hair mussed and lips damp and swollen and pink blooming in blotches under the light constellations of freckles across his skin. He looked debauched, flushed and obscene even with half his clothes still on, and there wasn’t room in her brain for humor when all she could feel was clawing shaking need. She dropped onto all fours, leaning down to trace the hard outline of his cock with her tongue, and even through his shorts he was burning warm. He sucked in a sharp breath, his pulse spiking under her mouth, and Gwen couldn’t resist closing her lips around the shape of his erection, breathing in the salty-ammonia smell of precome and feeling her mouth water. “David,” she began, but there was no end to that sentence so she lifted her head slightly, bit the delicate ridge of his hipbone where it peeked out from the waist of his shorts, caught him as his hips stuttered forward. She kept him steady, one hand splayed across his lower back, as she rose to her knees without lifting her mouth from his skin: over the barely-there softness of his stomach (no werewolf six-pack here, despite his lean strength), tongue swirling among the faint red hair below his belly button, following the curve of his ribs, just barely brushing one nipple — he made a small, strung-out noise in the back of his throat, almost despairing as she moved on up to his neck — until she found his lips again, dragging him into a bruising, breathless kiss.

When she pulled away David’s smile was gone, drawn out of his mouth and leaving him panting. “Okay,” he murmured, soft and almost reverent, but before she could figure out what specifically was okay he hauled her forward like she weighed nothing, capturing her lips for a second before trailing down her throat, pausing at a sensitive place above her pulse point and biting down hard, sucking the skin between his teeth.

Pain bloomed under his mouth, rippling out into shockwaves of cold-hot pleasure, and when he bit her again she couldn’t hold back a moan. “You’re gonna — leave a mark,” she gasped, gently shoving his head away and running her fingers over the damp skin. It was already tender, and judging by David’s expression, contrite and amused and darkly heated, it was going to be a hell of a hickey. “I can’t hide this!”

“I’m sorry!” he tried, but it wasn’t close to convincing when he couldn’t hide his grin. His eyes drifted down to the mark again and he licked his lips, expression growing dazed for a moment before he snapped back up to look at her face. “I can make you a bandana, if you want. Just until it fades.”

“Fucker.” Gwen laughed, not so much because it was funny but because it was him, and she loved him more than she could possibly stand. Tired of the overheated, confining clothes she was still wearing, she shimmied out of them, tossing her pajama shorts and half-soaked underwear without bothering to see where they landed. “Come here,” she said, pressing her legs together and shivering at the wet slide of her inner thighs and labia, a thousand nerve endings sparking to glistening life. “You can make it up to me.”

She swore she could almost see his mouth water, his gaze dropping between her legs as he took a deep breath and swallowed hard. “Yes, ma’am,” he said — and they’d never tried that before, but judging by the way his cock twitched and his eyes jumped sheepishly to hers, it was something he’d thought about a lot. Filing the information away for later, she held out her hand and pulled him closer when he took it, resting her forehead against his. It took just the slightest shift in the angle of her head to kiss him again so she did it without thinking, her hand sliding between their bodies to curl loosely around the outline of his erection.

He gasped shakily against her mouth, his hands fluttering up and down her waist like he couldn’t decide where to touch her. One of them dropped to her ass, a light, almost hesitant touch, and she rewarded it with a soft groan; he made a weak noise in the back of his throat and pulled her closer, kneading her ass before slipping lower, between her legs. The heel of his hand brushed teasingly against her clit as he pressed two fingers into her, and she mimicked his pace, gliding her palm down the length of his clothed cock and relishing the way his fingers twitched against her inner walls.

He fingered her like that, slow and steady, for — she didn’t know how long. Lost track of the strokes that sent warmly buzzing tendrils up her spine, lost count of the breaths gasped raggedly between their lips, of the kisses that melted into one another until she wasn’t entirely sure where she was, she was hyper aware of the heartbeat pounding in her clit and every too-gentle drag of his hand but numb to literally everything else that wasn’t right here, wasn’t David —

“Fuck,” she breathed, pressing her forehead against his shoulder with a shuddering sigh. She turned her head and lapped at his throat, sucking his skin into her mouth and biting down hard enough to make his fingers jolt inside her, pressing against her g-spot for one delicious moment. “God, I -- please, David, just make me come, please --”

Another shiver, another twitch of his fingers that took her breath away. “Okay,” he said, his voice strangled and hoarse. He pulled out of her and sat back on his heels. “Lay down, all right?”

Yes, yes, whatever he was thinking was 100% all right with her. She almost kneed him as she scrambled into position, but her embarrassed giggle evaporated as he lowered himself onto his elbows, scooching her up the bed like she weighed nothing and settling between her legs. Alarm cut through her arousal, her mind immediately trying to calculate the last time she’d showered, let alone shaved --

His eyes flicked up to hers, a small smile tugging at his lips. “I know,” he replied before she’d even opened her mouth. “I promise, I really want to.”

Oh, god. She covered her face to muffle a squeak, flopping onto her back and looking up at the ceiling. “I’m that predictable, huh?”

David hummed thoughtfully, the sound vibrating up the inside of her thigh. “Only with some things. Other times you surprise me quite a bit.”

“Yeah?” He kissed the top of her mound, his tongue dipping into the V formed by her lips and just brushing her clit — a teasing touch, his mouth moving away even as she lifted her hips instinctively. “I’m surprising?”

“You are,” he said, the camp-counselor cheer in his voice making what he was doing feel even more obscene. He traced the line of her cunt with his mouth before gently fingering her open. “The first time you did this, for example. That surprised me quite a bit!”

“This?” She knew exactly what he meant — her stomach still dipped and swooped at the memory of kneeling on the floor of his shower, the heady rush of confidence and vulnerability she’d felt looking up at him with his cock at her lips — but she tilted her head back with a sigh and breathed, “Pretty sure I’ve never eaten you out before. Not that I wouldn’t be into that, just saying.”

He gasped and spluttered, pulling back to wipe his mouth and staring at her with wide, shocked eyes, then coughed, tapping his chest with his other hand. “Excuse —?!”

When he lowered his head to cough again and take an unsteady breath, Gwen sat up on her elbows, not sure if she should be amused, worried, or mortified. “Oh my god, please tell me you did not just choke on cunt juice!”

David gave her a disgusted look, shaking his head and clearing his throat. “There had to be another way to word that,” he said, as primly as he could while still struggling to catch his breath. “But — um, you didn’t…w-was a joke, or…?”

“I meant it,” she admitted, “but I get it if you don’t want to, don’t feel pressured either way —”

“No — I want to.” He looked startled by his own words, and immediately dropped his gaze, smoothing his palms down her thighs like he could disguise how his fingers trembled. “Sometime. If — if you do.”

Gwen let the awkward silence linger for another moment, not quite sure how to move forward. “Good. That’s…something to put on the to-do list.”

“Y-yes. Okay.” He did meet her eyes then, brightening. “See, you did it again!”

She frowned. “Did what?”

“Surprised me.” He leaned over her body to tug her into a slow, sweet kiss. When she pulled back to breathe he cupped the back of her neck, holding her close and brushing his nose against hers. “You’re an adventure every day, Gwen,” he murmured.

“Yeah, I’m a real goddamn roller coaster,” she grumbled, shifting her hips upward in a blind search for his touch. “And I’d appreciate it if you’d fucking ride me already.”

David laughed softly against her mouth before turning his attention to her jaw, throat, collarbone — a damp, shivery brush of his tongue against her skin moving down her body. “Well goodness, Gwen, now I’m confused.” She both hated and loved the smug, teasing tone he got whenever her composure cracked. “I could make love to you,” he continued, nipping the skin just below her bellybutton and making her jump, “but I thought you wanted me to do this first.”

He closed his lips around her clit and sucked gently, catching her with an arm behind her back as she arched toward the maddening wet heat of his mouth. Lowering her hips back to the bed with infuriating tenderness, he paused, resting his cheek on her inner thigh and looking up the length of her body. When she met his eyes he smiled, pausing to press a chaste kiss to her leg before returning her gaze.

“What do you want, Gwen?” And he asked it untauntingly. Seriously. Like he wanted nothing more than for her to tell him what to do, and like he’d do it without question.

His sincerity was going to be the death of her, she decided with a groan, burying her hands in her hair and shielding her face from his view with her arms. “Fuck. I don’t know. Everything.”

When it came to David, she always wanted everything.

“That’s a real swell coincidence, then!” He traced the seam where her hip and leg met, then dipped down, dragging his fingertips through the wetness smearing her thighs before swiping them up to circle her clitoris. “Because ‘everything’ is exactly what I’d like to give you.”

She barely had time to absorb the statement before his mouth was on her again, sliding the hood back with his lips before swirling his tongue beneath it and around the exposed clit. It was almost too much, too sensitive, bordering on painful and if he stopped she might actually die; she knotted her fingers in the flimsy sheets to keep from pushing his face harder against her, vaguely aware that she was mumbling nonsensical pleas, an incoherent litany of “oh god yes please fuck don’t stop” —

He didn’t. Without lifting his mouth he braced one hand under her knee and pushed it toward her chest, bending her leg and using two fingers of his other hand to enter her. It took him a second but when he found her g-spot he pressed up hard, stroking with the same rapid pace of his flicking tongue. It was more pressure than she was used to, strangely achy but pleasurably so, and it was impossible not to writhe under his touch as the need to come coiled tighter, dragged her higher, kept her suspended on the brink for a frustrating, dizzying, electrifying moment that stretched like a rubber band…

Then it snapped — a dam breaking, a wave cresting and finally letting gravity take over — and she curled forward with a sob of relief, pleasure rippling through her limbs and turning her bones to liquid, trembling through the aftershocks.

The shift from overwhelmingly perfect to just plain overwhelming was a split second. “Nngh, stop, stop —” She pawed weakly at his head, just barely smacking the edge of his fringe with her fingertips, but he lifted his mouth from her with a look of concern. “You’re fine,” she added quickly, struggling to catch her breath and shivering from the buzz of overstimulation, “s’just too much.”

David nodded, relieved, and sat back, wiping his face with the back of his arm. “Wow,” he murmured, eyes wide and awed. “Wowzers. Gwen, have you ever done that before?”

She sat up, frowning. “Come like a train? Like every time we — whoa.”

The sheets between her legs were wet. Not damp, wet like she’d spilled a glass of water (and cooling rapidly, she realized with a grimace, shifting to avoid the blotchy patch). Presumably the same wetness dripping down David’s chin.

“Oh my god.” She groaned, hiding her face in her hands like if she couldn’t see it, it would disappear. Or feel it slicking her inner thighs. “And uh, not really,” she finally muttered, a belated answer to his question. “Once or twice, but you’ve really gotta work over the g-spot to make it happ --” She glanced up just in time to catch his expression, a flash of recognition mixed with pleased sheepishness. “Which you were.” David quickly looked away, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth and flushing pink. “On purpose?”

“I -- I’d read about it, that’s all!” he said, meeting her gaze defensively. “I knew it was, well . . . a thing. That some wom- people can do. And I was -- I’ve seen -- I was curious!” Gwen tried to stifle a laugh and failed, turning it into a choking snort, and he blushed even darker. “I know I should’ve just asked, but I couldn’t figure out how to say . . .”

She waited for him to finish the sentence, but when it became clear he had no intention of doing so, she injected as much demented cheer into her voice as possible and chirped, “‘Golly gee, Gwen, could I try making you squirt sometime?’”

Her imitation of his voice was passable -- she’d spent enough years making fun of him to get good at it -- and though he turned his head away she was positive he rolled his eyes at her. “I don’t know if that counts as bad language or not.”

“Oh no. It’d be so shocking if I said one of the no-no words.”

He chuckled, trying and failing to disguise it as a sigh, and climbed out of bed, tugging the rest of his clothes off. (As he picked up his shirt and wiped his face clean, Gwen quickly bent forward and sniffed the damp spot on the mattress. A little like saline, mostly like nothing. Good to know.)

“So how often do you trawl the internet for sex tips?” she asked, grinning. “Or -- god, tell me you’re not checking out books from the library.”

“Of course not!” He looked horrified at the thought. “And . . . sometimes. More often, after we started dating. I . . .” He paused, looking like he was reconsidering the rest of that sentence, and joined her on the bed to lean back against the headboard. “The time you visited, when I -- used my mouth on you for the first time.” (And what was it about his delicate tiptoeing that made it sound so much more filthy than if he’d said it outright?) “I thought -- or, well, I hoped . . . anyway, I did a little reading. Online, obviously. Just in case.”

So that was how he’d been so goddamn good right off the fucking bat. Always prepared, her boy scout. “Well, I appreciate it,” she said, and sat up, throwing one leg over his lap and draping her arms around his shoulders. “Can I please fuck you now, Mr. Greenwood?”

He sucked in an unsteady breath, his cock twitching up against her; the tip of his head slipped between her outer folds, making them both gasp. “C-condom,” he breathed, his voice raspy and uneven, and she scrambled off his lap before she could give in to the voice in the back of her head insisting they didn’t need to stop and get anything, he was right there , if she’d angled her hips right he could’ve been inside her already --

Her fingers were shaking as she retrieved the foil packet and brought it over, letting him take it with relief. (There was no way she wouldn’t have ripped it, with the way her whole body was trembling like the room had dropped ten degrees.) She watched him roll the latex down his cock, unable to tear her eyes away from how beautifully flushed it was, precome beading at the tip and slicking the inside of the condom.

God, she needed him inside her. Immediately.

David caught her with a breathless laugh as she vaulted back up onto the bed, curling his fingers around her hips and holding her steady. “Careful,” he murmured, and she rolled her eyes, fumbling blindly between her legs to line him up. “Have I- hhha --” He cut off, squeezing his eyes shut with a sigh as the head of his cock pressed into her, “t- told you how beautiful you are?”

Gwen frowned. It was kind of hard to focus on the question when her body was fluttering and pulsing as it adjusted to the welcome intrusion. “A lot?” she guessed, sinking down the last few inches too fast and bottoming out with an electric shock of pain and pleasure. “Fuck.”

“No. Not like that.” He slid one arm between their bodies, parting her folds to see the way she stretched around him. “I -- think you’re so pretty,” he managed, gently tracing her inner labia with his fingertips. “I like your colors. And how we -- um, contrast.”

No one had ever told her that her cunt was pretty before. It was just the kind of stupid, romantic thing David would do. And he was right; his cock looked so pale against her, where she faded from shocking pink into a dark purplish-brown that lightened as it blended into her normal skin tone. There was something about it that reminded her of a sunset -- which was just the kind of stupid, romantic thing David made her think.

“You’re an idiot,” she said, pressing her forehead against his and raising up a few inches, “and I love you so much.”

“I — love you too.” Suddenly he froze, his eyes widening and his grip tightening around her waist, keeping her from moving.

“David? Everything okay?” God, he wasn’t having some kind of terrible flashback, was he? Maybe they shouldn’t be doing this.

His eyes flicked up to hers, and a wide, sunny smile spread across his face like spilled honey. “This is just like the first time.”

It took her a moment to understand what he was talking about, but then it hit her: this was like the night they’d first had sex, from the position to the location to the dizzying, giddy strangeness of it.

God, he was perfect.

“Sort of.” She pressed a hard, quick kiss to his lips before grabbing a fistful of his hair and tugging his head to the side so she could reach his neck; he whimpered and twitched twice, each pulse against her inner walls taking her breath away. “Except I know you way better now.” She punctuated the statement by licking a wide stripe up the side of his throat, then sucked a mark right beside his Adam’s apple, where it’d be safely hidden by his bandana. “All your weak points.”

“I—” He swallowed, tilting his head obediently as she trailed a line of open-mouthed kisses up to his ear, “d-don’t know what you’re talking about.”

She just hummed; that wasn’t worth dignifying with a real response, and the vibrations against his damp skin made him shiver. Instead she toyed with him: tracing the shell of his ear with her tongue, nipping at his earlobe with just a hint of teeth, exploring the delicate area around his ear and neck she knew so well, had staked her claim to a hundred times before.

David’s breathing quickened, roughened, and she had to tighten her grip on his hair to keep him from squirming. Her hips weren’t moving but his were, minute jolts she was positive he couldn’t control. “Gwen,” he gasped, “please, I -- hhit's too much, I can’t --”

“Could you come like this?” she asked, fighting to keep her own voice level. She could feel his pulse pounding in his cock and in his throat, under her lips; her clit throbbed in response, a metronome perfectly attuned to him. “Without me even moving? Or just . . .” She squeezed her internal muscles, clenching around him in a quick staccato pattern, and lapped her tongue against his neck in time.

“Nnno. Or -- yes?” His fingers tightened around her hips, a helpless spasm. “I don’t know. It’d . . . be torture.”

His voice was so low, wrecked, and Gwen’s stomach went into a dizzying, delicious free-fall. “Good,” she said before she could stop herself, think it through and reject it as sounding weird and freaky. David successfully pulled back from her, his eyes wide and blown out with arousal, and he looked so beautiful she couldn’t stop herself from blurting out, “I want to torture you sometime. Nothing you’re not okay with -- and not now, but . . .”

“Yes,” he breathed, and the word was barely out of his mouth before his hand curled around the back of her neck and he was dragging her mouth to his, a kiss made of teeth and desperation with words gasped out against her lips: “yes, god, whatever you want Gwen please I love you --” His other hand slid to cup the curve of her thigh, urge her up onto her knees so he could fuck her properly, pull her back down to set a rhythm that bordered on frantic.

She couldn’t help but laugh, even as she braced her palms against the headboard for better leverage to ride him faster, harder. “Told you,” she teased, biting his lower lip hard enough to drag a breathy whine from him. “Weak.”

That made him moan, drawn-out and broken, and he slipped one hand between their bodies; curling it into a loose fist, he splayed his index and middle fingers just enough for her clit to glide between them, adding an extra jolt of friction every time she moved her hips. Gwen gasped, clutching at his back with one hand as her second orgasm coiled tighter at the base of her spine.

She bit his shoulder because she could, because she had to, because he’d like it and because it was that or scream loud enough to wake the entire camp. “Fuck, god, David --”

He shuddered and buried his face in her hair, his breath hot with a stream of pleasured mumbles beginning and ending in her name --

Gwen didn’t know which of them came first. It didn’t matter, really, because they dragged each other over the edge. His cock was almost painfully hard, unyielding as iron as her muscles tightened and fluttered around it, and the sudden snap upward of his hips as he came nearly knocked her breathless.

She was going to be sore tomorrow. Or . . . later today. She turned her head and mouthed at David’s neck, relishing the sweet-salt taste of his sweat, and let him hold her up as they caught their breath.

“I love you too,” she whispered belatedly. David huffed a weak laugh into her hair, stroking her back with a touch that was light and ticklish. “But we’re sleeping in your room tonight. I don’t wanna deal with the wet spot.”

Yeah, she was going to be sore, and exhausted, and facing a hell of a cleanup both in her bedroom and outside of it.

David groaned and gently pushed her upright, sliding out from under her and taking her hand, like she was a camper who needed to be ushered back to bed. “Phone,” she bleated, weakly reaching for it as they walked past, and he paused to pick it up for her, and in that second she loved him even more, more than she’d ever thought possible.

Worth it.

#campcamp #camp camp roosterteeth #gwenvid #cc gwen #cc david #this ending is too awkward to put in the main tags but fuck it #i spent weeks working on this okay #maybe even months #i am exhausted and cannot look at this anymore #hope y'all like your smut interspersed with pages upon pages of talking #because that's what you're getting #the only reason this isn't a total disaster is raenbows and don't anyone forget it #forestwriting

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crimsonrae · 5 years ago

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Oh, I am excited then! May I please request a Captain Syverson or Clark Kent/Femme! Reader oneshot where it's the reader's birthday, but she doesn't tell Sy/Clark because she doesn't celebrate/forgets and they find out and do something for her? Maybe a surprise dinner or something? Thank you so much, darling!!

Hey Nonnie,

As requested a birthday fic with Mr. Kent. Fluff fic - I hope you like it.

Clark KentxReader

Falling, Flying

Happy Birthday!

You sighed wearily as you eyed the balloon decorated card from the florist. A beautifully arranged bouquet of sunflowers and chrysanthemums rested on your desk. Admittedly, the amber and wine tones were striking and brought a brightness to your office that was usually lacking, but it was also like having a bright neon sign to remind you of a day that you usually wanted to ignore.

This was the problem with having with life-long friends... they liked to torture you.

You chucked the card into your trash and moved the flowers to the window. You’d text Maria later to call her an asshole and thank her for the little gift.

“Hey, nice flowers.”

Your butt had barely touched your desk chair. Biting back another sigh, you glanced up to see Lombard loitering in your doorway, “Thanks... Did you have that election article for me?”

“Y/N, it’s all work and no play with you.” Lombard complained loftily as he leaned against the threshold.

You shook your head, ignoring him as you logged into your computer. Your fingers clacked hard at the keyboard when he didn’t disappear nor answer your question. He stood like a creepy grotesque and it only took another minute of stunted silence before you broke.

“Lombard, what do you want?” He grinned victoriously while you threw a mocking scowl at him, “Article?”

He sauntered forward and dropped into the chair before your desk, “So, what are the flowers for? Did Smallville screw up? Apology flowers? Or an anniversary? Don’t let Lois see if it’s the second, cuzzz I don’t think it’s been quite a year since they’ve broken up.”

You rolled your eyes and grumbled under your breath about reporters. Never mind that you used to work as one, editing was more in your comfort zone anyway. You and Clark had only managed to date for two weeks before the office found out.

Bloodhounds – every single one of them.

Including your boy.

“You should work for a gossip rag, Steve. You’d really shine there.” You stated dryly, focusing back on the screen as a few new articles showed in your inbox. It was going to be a busy day of fact-checking and proofreading.

“Oh, don’t be mean. I’m just taking a healthy interest in my colleague’s life.” A smugly amused smirk crossed his lips before a pen came flying at his face, “Hey!”

Unapologetic, you pointed at the door “Get out of my office and get your article done.”

He moved to protest or retort, you weren’t sure, as a new voice interrupted.

“Harassing my girl again, Lombard.”

A feeling of déjà vu fell over you as you and Lombard looked to your door to see Clark leaning in the threshold. You smiled faintly at him becoming amused as Lombard actually shifted to stand. As nice as Clark was, Lombard was well aware that his arms were the size of his head. He felt it better for his ego if he never stood to close to the other reporter...or pissed him off.

And yet...

“Nice choice of flowers, Smallville. So, what did you do?” The smaller man queried jovially.

You threw another pen at him as Clark zeroed in on your present and frowned. He tilted his head curiously and came over to have a better look, allowing Lombard a direct escape if he wanted, “Those aren’t from me.”

You could practically feel a whole new level of intrigue pour from Lombard at Clark’s words. You sent the nosy reported a pointed glare and lifted a pen threateningly. He finally took the hint and left as you spun your chair to face your boyfriend.

You couldn’t stop a cheeky smile as he arched a brow at you, “Yeah...I’ve been meaning to tell you – I've been seeing other guys. You’re gonna need to step up your game, farm boy.”

Clark snorted and slanted a mockingly stern gaze at you through his glasses. You still couldn’t decide if you liked him better with or without the frames, but the meandering thought flew from your head as he nudged your legs apart with his knee and leaned into you. You spared a quick glance towards your open door before meeting him halfway for a kiss.

A soft warmth enveloped you as he nipped your lip and gently coaxed your mouth to open. He stole your breath as he delved deeper and you tasted each other thoroughly. Somehow, you always forgot how good a kisser he was.... it was almost unfair. Especially when he pulled away with that knowing glint in his eye that made you want to smack him and climb him like a tree all at once.

He smirked, “Somehow, I’m not worried.”

“You don’t play fair.” You grumbled though an affectionate smile pulled at the edges of your lips.

“Says the woman who’s receiving flowers from someone other than her boyfriend.” Clark drawled pointedly as he leaned against your desk.

Unwillingly, you glance at your flowery neon sign. You had no desire to share the real reason for the bouquet. Your birthday had never been a particularly good day for you and the only good ones that you had celebrated had been when you were alone.

A cup of tea and a good book to read as you let the day pass you by and ignored the fact that you were another year older... that was your perfection.

You sighed and shrugged, “They’re from Maria, so no need to be jealous.”

His brow furrowed. He had only met Maria a few times and was still trying to wrap his head around the friendship you two shared. Insults, practical jokes, and a fair bit of clothes thievery made up the majority of your relationship.

“You guys aren’t in a prank war again, are you?” Clark asked leerily.

He had been the unintended victim of a couple of your pranks the last month and you couldn’t help, but smirk at the memory.

You shook your head, a lie spilling from your lips before you could stop it, “No. I think I need to check my closet for those new Jimmy Choo's I bought. They’re probably gone now.”

Clark rolled his eyes, “I really don’t understand you two.”

“You don’t need to.” You replied calmly but made the mental note to check your closet anyway. You never knew with Maria.

“Y/N! Stop canoodling your boyfriend! You’ve got papers on the printer.”

A low groan left your lips as a faint heat filled your cheeks at Lombard’s voice, but you moved to get up anyway. You had no desire to have him hover in your office again.

Clark moved to follow before a colorful glint caught his eye. A quick check showed him that you were already out of the office as he reached down to pull the florist’s card from the trash. A deep frown marred his features as he took in the festive balloons and quickly scrawled birthday wish.

Why wouldn’t you tell him it was your birthday?

He quickly nabbed Maria’s number from your phone and disappeared from your office.

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

Your eyes had begun to sting as you stared at your computer screen. A small headache forming at the base of your neck, as you continued to work. You hadn’t been wrong when you assessed that today was going to be busy.

Five more articles had appeared on your desk before lunch and about a dozen phone calls placed and taken before and after that – notes were scribbled into margins and glaring errors corrected. So far, you had only been able to toss back a couple pieces and it was well after six already. Tiredly, you rubbed at the bridge of your nose, more than ready to go home and collapse into bed...but there was still so much you needed to do.

“Hey, you about ready to go?”

You started at the sound of Clark’s voice, nearly sending your keyboard skittering to the floor, “Christ! I swear you need a damn bell.”

He chuckled lowly, watching as you clutched at your chest and glared mildly at him. He came to stand next to your desk, noting that you hadn’t even begun to shut down for the night while his shoulder bag was already tucked under his arm, ready to call it quits, “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. Grab your stuff, I’m taking you to dinner.”

A rueful smile quirked at your lips as you wave him off, “Raincheck, babe. I need to get this done or Perry’s gonna have a fit.”

He frowned glancing over the mess of papers on your desk. He hadn’t planned for you to still be working and almost wondered if you had taken on extra articles on purpose, “How much more do you have to do?”

“Don’t know. Maybe another hour – two tops.” You shrugged and smiled softly at him, “You’re free to roam the skies, Captain.

Clark raised an incredulous brow. Not because you had alluded to his alter-ego, you had known for a few months now and had slowly been coming to terms with the fact that your boyfriend was a superhero. It was a road that had not been easily traveled by any means. No, his disbelief came from now being certain that you had taken on extra articles.

You didn’t often seek solitude, but when you did it was by diving into your work... he had learned that particular quirk relatively quickly and almost painfully. But not tonight – tonight you and he had plans and he wasn’t about to let you break them.

He reached over your shoulder and hit a couple buttons on your keyboard to send your computer into hibernation. You stared in shock at his gall, “Clark!”

He was already grabbing your coat, “Dinner, let’s go.”

Your gaze swiveled from the computer to him, your headache becoming full-blown as your expression creased into annoyance, “I told you, I have work. I’m sorry if that ruins your plans, but we’ll just -”

“You didn’t have lunch.” He cut you off and crossed his arms with a mild glare of his own, “You’ve been mainlining coffee like there’s about to be a tariff placed on it. I wouldn’t be surprised to find that all you ate today was a bagel from Guillermo’s. And I know for a fact that no one has a deadline that needs to be met today or tomorrow. Dinner. Now. Don’t think I won’t drag you out of here.”

You glare at each other in a silent standoff. It wasn’t until he stepped toward you that you gave in with a heavy scowl, “What are you? My mother?”

“A concerned boyfriend.” He retorted as he held out your coat.

You accepted it grudgingly and grabbed your purse before stepping out of the office. Clark followed behind you, not wanting to give you a chance to close the door on him. You had done it before.

He watched you from the corner of his cerulean eyes. Your annoyance didn’t last long, but a deep weariness seemed to fall over you as the two of you left the Planet. He slid a warm comforting hand across the small of your back to grip lightly at your hip. Relief flowing through him as you leaned into his side. You weren’t too annoyed with him, then.

You made it down an entire block before you realized you didn’t know where you were heading. Both of your apartments were in the other direction and any decent restaurant required calling for a cab to get to...

You blinked in confusion, “Clark...where?”

He smiled wondering when you would ask. Glancing around discreetly, he pulled you into an alley and firmly against his body. Your brow rose, a questioned poised on the tip of your tongue that turned into a startled scream as you suddenly found yourself in the air.

Your arms wrapped around his neck like a lock as you buried your face into his shoulder. Muffled curses and small whimpers spilled from your throat as the two of you flew. Even when he slowed, now safely away from prying eyes and telescopes, you refused to look up.

“You can relax. I won’t drop you.” He murmured into your ear, feeling mildly guilty for scaring you. He could feel you trembling and knew it wasn’t from the cold air.

A muffled curse was his only response as you gripped tighter. You did not like this.

Luckily, you were soon on the ground again, though it took you a few minutes to remember how to unlock your frozen limbs. Your heart pounded in your chest as you swallowed against a noxious turn of your stomach. You couldn’t stop shaking...

Clark rubbed soothingly at your arms as you tried to find some semblance of control over your body. Your eyes slowly opened into a dark glare, your hand already moving to smack him in the chest. It was infuriating to know that it wouldn’t hurt him, “Don’t ever do that again, you jackass.”

His eyes widen in a way that reminded you of a scolded puppy, but you refused to bend and stumbled back a step. You turned intending to see where exactly he had dropped you and figure out how to get home but froze at the sight you found.

Twinkle lights shimmered in the burgeoning night sky as they danced about the branches of an old willow tree. A small wooden table set for two was guarded by the fluttering leaves while being showcased by the light. It was startlingly quaint and romantic all in one.

Martha smiled as she placed a covered dish in the center of the table and waved at the two of you. You were on the farm...

“Happy Birthday,” Clark murmured behind you.

Your mouth moved silently before you turned confused eyes on him, “...How?”

“I saw the card in your trash can. Called Maria... then I called mom.” Clark explained casually as if he were talking about the weather.

Stunned all you could do was blink, even as Martha came up to greet the two of you.

She wrapped you in a quick hug, “Happy Birthday, dear.”

Then turned to place a kiss to her son’s cheek before shooing you towards the table, “Go, eat before it gets cold. I need to finish your cake.”

Cake. The word jolted you back to reality, “Oh Martha - you didn’t need to go through all this trouble.”

“Nonsense.” She called back, already halfway back to the house.

Distracted, Clark slipped his hand into yours and gently tugged you towards the table. Smells of garlic and tomato and cheese wafted toward you and your mouth began to water. Sheer wonder filled you as Clark pulled your chair out for you and then moved to uncover the dish Martha had left. Steam rose into the air as he revealed a freshly baked lasagna. Salad and garlic bread next to it.

Your throat constricted as you took in the care that had gone into this... A home cook meal shouldn’t bring you to tears, but you felt the sting at the corners of your eyes.

“Y/N?” Clark called quietly. Worried that he may have overstepped his bounds with this surprise.

Your heart felt too big for your chest as you met his gaze. It was with tremulous movements that you left your seat to place a grateful kiss to his lips, “Thank you...I didn’t...You didn’t need...”

You couldn’t find the words to express just how overwhelmed you were feeling as you fell back to your seat, but not letting go of his hand.

Clark watched you with a soft smile, “I think it's my right to spoil my girlfriend on her birthday, though it would help if I had known sooner.”

A stray tear spilled down your cheek as you shook your head, knowing that you would have to explain your distaste for this day...but you also didn’t want to dwell on those thoughts, “I didn’t expect you to...Clark -”

He squeezed your hand as if he already knew, “Tell me later, I have more spoiling to do.”

You huffed a laugh and shyly smiled, “You know Clark Kent, you really know how to make a girl fall.”

He grinned widely, “And to think you hate flying.”

“You’re still not fully forgiven for that... but I think I’ll get over it.” You murmured, joy burning your veins as his expression turned relieved.

He pressed a kiss to your joined hands.

It was the first birthday you could say that you truly enjoyed. Over a plate of hot lasagna in the late summer night as crickets chirped and frogs sang and with a man... a man who looked at you like you were the only thing that mattered. That was the only present you ever needed.

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

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#man of steel #superman #clark kent #clark kent x reader #fanfiction

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free-pancakes · 4 years ago

Text

Kiss the Drummer

Summary: a LeviHan Jazz!AU

Levi, a talented trumpet player famous in the jazz clubs of New York, is struggling with his instrument and feels burnt out—he wonders if he chose the right path in life.

The bassist of his quintet, an old friend named Erwin, invites a quirky new drummer to play with them, who brings a new spark into Levi’s life.

Notes: Drum "chops” describe a drummer's technical ability, including a large vocabulary of licks, and how freely they express themselves on the instrument. BPM = beats per minute Songs: Giant Steps - John Coltrane

sorry this AU fic is pure self-indulgence and has become much longer than originally intended lol

crossposted to AO3

CHAPTER 1

He licked his lips and pushed them readily against the smooth, silver mouthpiece, ready to hit the first note of the song, Giant Steps. He suppressed his desire to grumble at yet another fast swing tune.

He stared out into the audience, peering at the people sitting around the tables of the club. Their faces were slightly lit from the reflection of the stage lights, wearing expressions of both excitement and anticipation. “Just another night of the same old thing,” Levi thought to himself, letting out a soft, exasperated sigh, one only he could hear. His stance conveyed confidence, but his eyes spelled apathy.

He heard snaps on 2 and 4 marking their starting tempo at 289 bpm and Levi quickly puffed warm air into his trumpet.

“One… two… one two three four—“

——

Levi wiped down his trumpet, carefully cleaning the beautiful brass after yet another great performance. He gently placed it in his case, and looked up at himself in the dressing room mirror. He stared blankly at his reflection, noting the tinge of purple beneath his eyes—he knew his body was aching for sleep. It had been restless upon restless night for the past year or so, and he wasn’t completely sure why. He looked down at his trumpet case with both affection and disdain. Maybe... he just wasn’t meant to do this for this long.

He didn’t hate playing, but the truth was, he had simply been good at it all of his life. Quite gifted at it, one would say, and thus he passively let it lead him to success. It was just what it was. He was good at jazz, he was good at trumpet. Naturally he studied it at a top university for jazz performance and joined this famous quintet, and naturally he worked hard to improve his skills. But as any routine would, practice and rehearsals became monotonous, grunt work.

While lost in thought, his eyes trailed over to his small, neat pile of math textbooks at the edge of the dresser.

If anything, he did enjoy jazz theory. It was just math, anyway—circle of fifths, cadence patterns, fancy scales—it all just added up and broke down for any message or feeling you wanted to convey with a melody for your solo, and those tools were simply available in your brain to make it happen—tools to play some straight dirty solos that make you smirk satisfactorily when listening. To Levi, it just made sense, to a lot of other people, he was called “genius”. But after years and years of this, he was burning out and he was quite aware of that. He felt like he was losing his edge, and he was just a machine clunking out music most nights of the week. Again he thought, maybe he just wasn’t meant to do this forever. But what else would pay the bills?

Shaking his head, he let his jumbled thoughts fall away momentarily. He picked up a textbook, and leafed through the pages. He clicked open a ballpoint pen and began adding to his lesson plan for one of his students, a young girl named Sasha. Honestly, she seemed utterly hopeless with math at times, but he was determined to help her at least pass her algebra class. Her little friend Connie on the other hand…well that’s a story for another day, he thought, and chuckled softly to himself. If anything, he did enjoy his side job as a math tutor for the local school system. He didn’t really need the extra pocket money, but something compelled him to keep up with it.

As he jotted down notes, muffled noise of cheering and commotion rocked against the door. Tonight’s gig was Nile’s last performance with them, as he was moving out to the west coast to play with another group and accept a teaching position somewhere out there. Levi didn’t care much for his drumming or his personality for that matter, so he wasn’t particularly sad to see him go, nor was he keen on joining the celebration out in the bar. He yawned and continued finish up writing his lesson plan, as he knew he’d probably have to drive his drunk colleagues home.

——

“Levi! I’m gonna miss you buddy!” Nile exclaimed as he aggressively ruffled Levi’s hair, causing the cowlick he spent every morning trying to gel down to stick straight up embarrassingly at the top of his head. “Yeah, yeah, yeah… good luck Nile.” He shoved him and Mike into a cab, as they lived in the same apartment complex. He turned back into the bar to Erwin smiling drunkenly and Nanaba knocked out cold, sleeping soundly as she sat with her head down on a table. Levi grumbled and picked up Nanaba’s saxophone case to haul into the trunk of his car. He returned to pick up Nanaba and carried her on his back, and Erwin walked with them to Levi’s car.

“Hey Levi, Our new drummer is flying in tomorrow. I told her I’d come and pick her up from the airport at 7am.”

Levi looked Erwin up and down with a look of disgust. “In that sorry state, Eyebrows? Tch, go sleep off the hangover tonight, I can go to the airport. What’s her name and what does she look like?”

“Her name’s Hange. She has messy brown hair usually worn up in a ponytail, wears tortoise clubmaster glasses and well… honestly you can’t miss her, I’m sure you’ll find her right away.”

“Okay. So why’d we need to bring in a completely new drummer anyway? Couldn’t we have just brought in Moblit?”

“Ah you know his style doesn’t fit ours as well, plus he’s doing well with his band right now. Don’t worry, Hange and I played together all 4 years of college together, she’s got chops. Plus, I think Hange will probably bring in the change we need. Your playing’s gone a bit stale... hasn’t it, Levi?”

“Stale?! Pfft you’re just drunk,” Levi muttered, irritated as Erwin raised his eyebrows at him. They arrived at their apartment complex and Levi begrudgingly unlocked the car doors, gently woke Nanaba, and the three of them walked up to their floor. Erwin fumbled with his keys, and Levi snatched it out of his hands, frustrated at how long it was taking him. Erwin chuckled, and Levi scrunched up his nose at the stench of alcohol in his breath. As soon as the door opened, Nanaba immediately ran to the bathroom, retching into the toilet.

“I got her,” Erwin laughed. “Go to bed, Levi, you’re the one getting up early. Flight info’s next to the door.”

Levi nodded, turned into his room, and plopped down on the bed. He stared at the ceiling, and wondered how much longer he’d keep playing, or more like, how soon he’d quit. If this Hange person was as annoying as Nile, well… he probably wouldn’t hold out much longer.

——

Levi stood with his hands in his pockets, eyes peeled for this Hange person. He looked at his watch—“Maybe she was still waiting on her luggage,” he thought. He walked over to the small cafe to his left, and waited in line, squinting for any decent teas on the menu. Before he could decide, he suddenly heard a small yelp, and something shoved right into his chest, feeling piping hot coffee running down his white, longsleeve shirt. Before he could yell obscenities at the moron who just ruined one of his favorite shirts, he was met with frantic apologizes.

“I’m so so sorry! Oh my goodness it was a complete accident, can I get you a drink to make up for it? Man I am so clumsy...oh! Maybe you can wear one of my shirts I have here, free of charge! Or I could just—“

He looked up in the middle of incessant rambling to see the culprit—a tall brunette, hair messily tied up in a bun, wearing tortoise clubmaster glasses, and a bright yellow coat.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Levi thought to himself. He looked down to see a large black cymbal case and a stick bag with yarn mallets and drumsticks poking out of it.

—I could just buy you a new shirt! Oh, how bout—“

Levi was livid—this clown was potentially going to be playing gigs with them over the next year? The coffee stained fabric was sticking uncomfortably to his skin and he felt the biggest headache coming on—all this pain just from one person. He reached up and gently placed his hand over her mouth to physically stop her chattering.

“Is your name, Hange?”

She nodded, Levi’s hand still covering her mouth.

“You’re Erwin’s friend?”

She nodded again, her eyes lighting up at the name, Levi feeling her lips forming a smile under his palm.

“Okay, I’m taking you back to our apartment.”

Levi reached for her bags to carry them, but was interrupted.

“Wait—the least I can do is give you the extra shirt I have in my backpack so you can change out of your soiled one,” she said softly. She reached in her bag, and pulled out the shirt and Levi felt his eye twitch in annoyance at the words printed on its front. He sighed, and debated sitting in his wet shirt, but it seemed like he didn’t have much choice—he’d have to wear it.

——

Levi blinked his eyes open. He felt oddly rested, but one thing was strange—he was sitting up, and he felt something unusually heavy on his shoulder.

“What the—“

He looked to the side and saw a mess of brown hair immediately to his right, heard the soft sound of snoring, and felt… something wet on his arm? He looked down and grimaced. “Drool. She’s drooling. On my goddamn arm.”

He looked around for some kind of napkin. He didn’t remember falling asleep, let alone letting this absolute stranger curl up against him. How in the world did he let his guard down this far?

He stared blankly at Hange and thought, “What a mess—what was Erwin thinking? We’ve known each other for less than 5 hours, and she seems to have already made herself right at home. I haven’t even confirmed whether she was good enough to play with us, yet.” He tried to shift out from underneath Hange, but before he could wriggle is way out—

“Kiss the drummer?”

Erwin and Nanaba stood before Levi, both with hair in a complete mess, having just woken up from sleeping off their hangovers. Smirking and holding back laughter, they stared at the scene—Levi wearing an oversized t-shirt with the words “Kiss the Drummer” in bold letters plastered across his chest, along with Hange sleeping quite cozily on his shoulder, her glasses held gently between his fingers. Levi tried covering up the words and scowled at his two friends.

“Laugh it up,” he muttered. “What is this, Erwin? She’s clearly made herself at home already—and we haven’t even gotten to play together yet.”

“Relax, Levi, she’s a great musician. And look, she likes you!”

Levi grimaced at Hange draped over his shoulder.

“Hmph, I still have to hear her play and have my opinion considered. We all get a vote yknow…”

Over their hushed voices, Hange shifted groggily towards all of them and rubbed her eyes. “Erwin?”

Hange’s eyes lit up immediately in recognition, shoving Levi back further into the couch as she jumped up to wrap Erwin in her embrace, excited to finally be reunited with her friend after so many years.

After a few minutes of catching up, Erwin smiled brightly. “Yes, we can take you around the city a bit. Rehearsal’s not til this evening anyway—we did have a gig lined up last minute for the middle of this week if you were comfortable with that, Hange.”

“Of course I’d be down to do that! I—“

“Oi. Like I said, we still vote if you get to play with our group officially. Don’t be late to rehearsal tonight.” Levi then slowly stood up and walked quietly towards his room.

“Don’t mind him, he’s just being strict about our technical audition policy,’ Erwin reassured. He and Nanaba quickly darted for their rooms to ready themselves to take Hange sightseeing for a little while and introduce her to the city, leaving her standing alone in the middle of their living room. Her eyes trailed after Levi, curious about his calm yet sad energy. She felt that she saw through that aura, noticing every little kind gesture he made towards her from the time they met at the airport to the moment they fell asleep on the couch. Hange was determined to get him to show that side of himself a little more. As he turned to grab the door behind him, she smiled at him, and was quickly met with a scowl and the slam of his bedroom door in her face. Seemed it might take some more effort to get through to him than she originally thought.

#levihan #levihan fanfiction #levihan fanfic #levi ackerman #hange zoe #hanji zoe #lol idk what this but here ya go #inspired by the movie Soul and because i miss playing drums

50 notes · View notes

simpsiren · 4 years ago

Text

sticky notes: the story

mark lee x reader

introduction

main masterlist

description. you use sticky notes to get into contact with your soulmate.

genre. soulmate au, high school au, strangers to lovers au

warnings. nonee

a/n. so some people requested for a full story of this so here it is! i really liked making this because the concept is just so cute cudndn oh and i did include the same idea as what i did in my previous post but i had to change it a little so that it would fit the plot. this is a really really long ff since its a slow burn typa thing so please try to stick with me on this one HAHA anyways enjoyy! :D

“you actually believe that?”

you lift your head up from your notes to look at soyoung. she nods her head and hum eagerly. you rub your temples from seeing her respond. “i do believe soulmates exist. but sticky notes to talk to them? what’s social media for then? and how is it even scientifically possible?” you question soyoung, bringing your eyes down as you continue to do your homework.

“that’s the beauty of soulmates, ray!” soyoung whines. you shake your head. “you’re dumb to believe it without confirming the information with other relevant sources.” you mutter out bluntly. you hear soyoung letting out a ‘tsk’. “here you go again being a history student. i swear im glad i never took it.” you scoff and slam your pen on the table gently.

“excuse me, woman! at least i dont have to memorise the whole textbook and only having 5 pages of content coming out in the exam.” you stick your tongue out playfully to tease soyoung. “i cant get over the fact that valcanos didn’t come out eventhough i memorised so much for it.”

the both of you laugh, knowing that the two of you can never stop debating on whether history or geography is the better subject.

“ray complete your homework at home. we cant stay in the classroom for long you know?” soyoung stands up to get to her seat, which is 2 rows down yours since you were sitting right at the back. you liked sitting at the back. it allowed you to always be able to use your phone in case you get bored in class. you still cant believe that your teachers think you’re a good and obedient student. you figured they only assumed that due to your high grades.

you sigh “that’s true.” you turn around to grab your back that was hanging in your chair and start packing your materials. once you were done, you grab the class key and walk over to soyoung’s seat, waiting for her to finish packing. you notice soyoung has finish packing and went to switch off the lights. you allow soyoung to step out first before you close the door behind you and lock the classroom door.

you and soyoung walked down the hallway silently, you were looking out the window to watch the sunset while soyoung had her eyes on her feet. only your footsteps could be heard as almost everyone has left the school grounds except for some teachers who were working late. the school normally closes at 7pm and you’re walking out at 6:50. to break the silence, soyoung opens her mouth to start a conversation.

“okay if you dont believe me why dont you try it yourself? like write a simple introduction to your soulmate.” you raise an eyebrow as you shove your hands into the front pockets of your mom jeans. “why dont you do it?” you fought back as you huff. soyoung bites the inside of her cheek as a moment of silence passes for her to think of an answer.

“because i believe it. and you do not. so you should try it.” you smacked soyoung’s arm, making her flinch back and shouting a loud ‘ouch’. you roll your eyes, knowing you didn’t hit her hard and she was just overreacting. “brilliant excuse,so. but if its going to make you stop talking about it, i might as well.” soyoung face lit up as she jumps happily and starts skipping ahead of you. you laugh and pull the handle at back of her bag to keep her explosion of excitement to the minimum.

“you owe me brown sugar milk tea. large.” you taunted. soyoung waves her hand lazily. “i’ll buy you one after school tomorrow. but you better update me during math.”

you wanted to say how you could just text soyoung to update her, but you remembered the fact that soyoung’s mother took away her phone since she didn’t do well for this year’s midterms. although to you, soyoung’s grades were decent. unfortunately for her, soyoung has to live up to her asian mom’s high expectations. the thought of this made you want to frown, but you showed a bright smile regardless as the two of you finally made it to the school gate, waving to each other and bidding farewell before walking down opposite paths.

once you arrived at home, you took out your phone from your back pocket. you saw a notification from your mother saying that your parents would be home late. you shrug your shoulders as you walk to your room. “as always.” you breathed out.

you did your normal routine of showering and eating leftover dinner that you needed to heat up at the couch while you completed one episode of the anime series you were so hooked on. you continue watching but with the amount of homework you have, you might finish them all by midnight if you dont slack.

you turned off the tv and washed your plate before heading into your room. as you close the door behind you, your eyes immediately went to your desk, which was pretty messed up since you had a test to study for yesterday that you completely weren’t prepared for and had to squeeze in as much information as you can. hence, the scattering of notes and textbooks.

you stroll over to your desk and sat down. you take out your homework from your back which was beside the desk. looking at the stack of homework, you groan in despair as shove it to the back of the desk till it hit the wall. “ah fuck it! im just going to ask kun for help.” you admitted your defeat depsite thinking you would be able to gain some energy from your dinner. you also thought about how you’ve done your homework in the morning plenty of time so i shouldnt be a problem unless kun doesn’t offer his help.

you jump to your bed and lay down, bringing your phone out and immediately start scrolling through instagram. as you swiped your finger up to look at the posts of the people you follow, you stop at one. a picture of a couple who met through the sticky note theory. or so they claim. your thumbs hover over the screen as your eyes look up to the ceiling, starting to remember what soyoung asked to do to get your bubble tea.

yoy tap your index finger on the side of your phone as you constantly started to think whether you should do it or not. you’ve heard the rumours. but are they even true? the more you thought about it, the more intriguing the idea got. but at the same time, you also thought of how stupid it sounded and was probably made to fool people.

after contemplating and having in a debate in your head that felt like forever, you finally place your phone down beside you and take a deep breath. “ill do it.” you groan to yourself, letting curiosity take over your other feelings.

you gather up your strength to stand up from your bed and walk over to your desk. you push all the papers and textbooks aside, grabbing a yellow sticky notepad from your stationery organiser. you had other colours too like pink and purple, but you figured that you should go with the classic.

pulling out a random pen that was laying in between the pages of one of your textbooks, you tilt your head to the side as you start thinking of what to write, unconsciously biting the end of your pen in the process.

you bite the side of your cheek and shrug, deciding to go with the plan of writing whatever that comes to your mind.

um hi? i dont even know if you’re going to see this. its funny, really. i heard a rumour that you can communicate with your soulmate through sticky notes. it’s probably just fake news and im writing to a nobody. that would honestly be embarrassing but it’ll be like love letters.. to myself(?) or my soulmate. write back? haha

you read over what you wrote an endless amount of times, thinking if you should make changes. you groan and immediately stick the sticky note onto your wall, giving up on giving second thoughts about what you call this ridiculousness.

you went about your night, forgetting you have left the sticky note on the wall. as you were on you bed scrolling through tumblr at 2 in the morning, you hear something. it sounded like a piece of paper had fallen from your desk.

unable to see in complete darkness, you turn on the flashlight from your phone and walk around your room, trying to find whatever it is that fell. it didn’t take you long to find a small yellow sticky note that you accidentally stepped on.

you pick it up, remembering that you wrote on the sticky note and thought that it was yours. however, once you were able to get a closer look, you noticed that the words on the sticky note have changed. so has the handwriting.

holy shit. i dont know what is this. but apparently a sticky note appeared on my wall saying i have a soulmate. my friends told me i should write back because of some rumour. so here i am trying. hi im mark. i dont know your name, but hope you’ll tell me once you recieve this. you’re in luck because apparently the rumour is true. im just as crepped out as you are.

you froze in your spot. your fingers shaking as you read the note again. you scratch your head. being too tired and unable to think straight at 2 in the morning, you place the sticky note on your desk and went back to bed to play with your phone. you soon forget about the fact that your soulmate has replied to your message that you have written on your sticky note.

as you got ready for the next period which was math, soyoung immediately runs over to you, dragging the chair from the desk beside you and taking a seat. you flinch a little when you suddenly see her close to you.

“so did you try it?!” soyoung asks, her voice filled with enthusiasm . you brushed a few pieces of hair behind your ear, nodding your head as you take out your textbook from under the desk. “did you get a reply then?”

your mind started to take you back to the mysterious encounter that you had last night. “mhm.” you reply simply. “though the only thing i remember because it seems to be the only relevant information is that the person’s name is mark.” soyoung gasped loudly, making you crease your forehead as you watch her overreacting again.

“your soulmate’s name is mark then.” soyoung concludes, folding her arms confidently as if she made a great discovery. you laugh, rolling your eyes sarcastically. “isnt it obvious?” soyoung frowns fakely.

your mouth gapes open as you hit soyoung’s arm lightly. “buy me my milk tea!” you demanded with a wide smile. soyoung places her notebook on your table and nods constantly. “i will you addict.” she groans. you happily say thank you as your teacher comes into the classroom and class began.

“what are you going to do about it now though?” as you recieved the question from soyoung, you kept silent for a moment, giving time to think of an answer.

“ill write something back? i dont know.. ill have to read the letter again when i get back home.” you whispe to soyoung. she nods in reply as the two of you payed your attention to the front again. it surprised you that soyoung was paying attention but you only assumed that she wanted to do better in class and shrug your shouders, writing down the notes youve missed while talking to soyoung.

as for you, your concentration in class dipped slightly because now, the thing that is occupying your head the most is the thought that the sticky notes theory might actually be real and you cant say its not possible anymore, making you even more shocked than you did last night.

lucky for you, today is the only day of the week where your class ends the earliest, along with two other lower ranked classes. you and soyoung quickly pack up to go to the mall to get your reward. after soyoung buys you your drink, you and soyoung went your separate ways.

after about 30 minutes of taking the bus and walking, you finally arrived at home. you place your drink on the living room table and proceed to place your bag in the room and head for the showers.

once you were done showering, you walk out of the bathroom to head to your room while drying your hair with a small towel. opening the door, you enter and went straight to your clothing rack. just when you were about to grab a shirt from the hanger, you heard the same noise last night. another piece of paper has fallen on the floor.

you turn your head and look down. this time, you found another sticky note right in front of your feet. the colour of the sticky note changed from yellow to a light blue. you tilt your head as you pick up the stick note from the floor, finding it odd as you wonder how the colour of the sticky note changed.

you take a deep breath before reading it, noticing that the handwriting was similar to the one you read last night. a little messier, but still readable.

hi again.. im not sure if you’ll recieve this since its the afternoon and i know people are busy with work or school. i skipped school today so haha. um i just wanted to write to you, despite me not knowing a single thing about you. its odd really. its like i feel the need to write something to an unknown identity that people assume to be my soulmate. i still dont know your name, so i hope youll reply soon. take your time and take care :)

- mark

“skip school? what is he, a bad boy?” you scoff to yourself. you try to take in whatever’s on the note, but another thought comes to mind. you walk over to your desk and saw that the yellow sticky note with mark’s reply was still there. you find everything about this weird and just odd in general. a lot of questions sprouted, but you didn’t want to think of it since you were afraid you would complicate your thoughts and just throw yourself into a stress hole.

you continue to dry your hair with one hand while the other held onto the light blue sticky note. you bit your lip and gulp. after letting out a long sigh, you place the sticky note next to the other one and changed into your clothes, as well as bringing your drink from the living room table to your room, placing it on the desk as you sat down.

you take out your pencilcase from your bag and brought out your fresh new black pen that you just bought at the school’s stationery store. the previous pen you had was full of ink till soyoung was dumb enough to drop it, spoiling the pen and was unable to be used again.

peeling off another yellow stick note from the stack at the edge of your desk, you were about to put your pen on paper when you realise you dont even know what to write. what do you say to this person you barely know about? you continuously tap the edge of the pen against your desk as you take a sip of your drink. you look over to the two sticky notes with the messages that the person has left. its funny how you have to think so hard just to write a short message.

hey again. i actually ended school early today. my name’s raven. but my friends call me ray. i honestly don’t know what to say to you. im still dumbfounded over the fact that you’re my soulmate and we’re here communicating over sticky notes. the world really does work in a strange way. if you dont mind, i guess i want to know how old you are and you’re education status?

you held out the sticky note in front of you and sigh in satisfaction. why? it’s because of your neat handwriting. it was always a trait of yours that you deeply appreciate. you place the sticky note on the wall and advert your attention to the other sticky notes, placing them on the wall beside the new one you have just written.

“will this drive me insane? i might end up with a whole wall of this.” you say to yourself, rubbing your face with your palm before going to your bed and laying down, wanting to have your evening nap.

“this is awesome!”

“no its scary.”

mark and his group of friends stared at the sticky note that has a message written with beautiful handwriting. mark flinched when he felt an arm on his shoulder, turning around to notice it was chenle’s. “when did you write your previous sticky note?” renjun suddenly asked. mark tilts his head as he tried to find an answer.

“less than an hour before you guys came i guess?” mark shrugs, standing up from his desk and taking a seat at the edge of the bed beside jaemin and haechan. “this raven girl is your soulmate then.” chenle walks towards mark and stands in front of him. mark nods slowly. the room grew silent again with everyone having the similar thoughts.

“you know what would be funny?” haechan smacks mark’s thigh, the sound making everyone turn their attention to mark and haechan. “what?” mark asked with a sigh, running a hand through his hair.

“why dont we prank her and say you’re a sugar daddy and live in a mansion?!” everyone gave yuta weird looks, making haechan laugh hysterically. “are you crazy? do you think i want to chase my soulmate away?” mark scolded haechan, smacking him hard on the chest, resulting in haechan’s back falling onto the bed.

“you’re always asking for a beating i swear.” renjun comments, walking towards haechan and balling his hand into a fist and acting as if he was about to attack. jaemin laughs to try and calm them down. “kids let’s not fight.” jaemin announced, looking over to jeno only to find him standing there watching quietly.

“go ahead, mark. you should write something. we cant keep her waiting.” jeno finally spoke up, grabbing the sticky notepad and a random pen from mark’s table and passing it over to him.

mark stared at the blank paper while the others were talking about what to have for dinner. it didn’t take him long to decide what to write. when mark starts writing and began to be in full concentration, everyone crowds around him to see what he’s writing.

sup raven! i wont call you ray since we aren’t friends yet. im still shocked. like the possibility of things like this being possible is just another possibility that can possibly happen. but anyways, to answer you question, im a high schooler from dream high. im in my third year. its kind of awkward for me while im writing this since my friends are reading every word im taking down. i guess i should ask you the same question back then. hope to hear from you soon.

“will you guys stop being nosy?” mark groans, standing up and pasting the sticky note on his wall, along with the other sticky notes he received from you. “you didn’t have to say that we’re here.” haechan retorts. mark rolls his eyes. “jesus..” mark mutters under his breathe. “anyways, yall are paying for dinner since you guys bribed me to write back.” mark sticks his tongue out playfully and runs out to the living room. everyone follows suit.. except for jeno.

jeno slowly walks towards the wall and leans forward to get a closer look of the sticky notes, specifically the two others beside the new one that mark just wrote. “raven? why does that sound so familiar? the handwriting...” jeno brings his finger up and lightly hovers them over the uniquely written words. it looked like calligraphy, and retro looking. jeno felt as though he had seen it before somewhere, or knew someone who wrote like that.

jeno snapped out of his deep thoughts when jaemin called out to him, making him walk towards the door and glancing at the sticky notes once more before joining the others in the living room.

you were currently video calling your friends when you heard the crackling of a piece of paper. of course you knew what that meant. you peered down the the floor from your bed and reached your hand out to pick up the sticky note. “ray?” doyoung called out to you when he noticed your face wasnt on screen. you lay back down on the floor and brought your phone up to show your face.

“what was that sound earlier?” lucas asked, currently sounding hyper. “the mysterious mark sent me another sticky note.” you reply sarcastically, waving the sticky note to the camera to let everyone look at it. everyone nodded their heads at the some time, some letting out a long ‘ah’ as well. “read it out loud!” yuta shouted.

“the fuck no!” you shouted back. you stared at the sticky note, but didn’t bother to read it. you thought of doing that once you’re done video calling them.

“how was today for you guys?” you asked, wanting to know how they’re doing.

“its tiring! we had dance practice, then we have to do recordings for our new albums. we barely get any sleep.” ten whines, his tone filled with stress. you laugh loudly. it made everyone frown and pout. you sigh. “pursuing your NCT world domination is never easy.” you commented, highlighting the word ‘world domination’ with a change of tone.

everyone lets out a long sigh and started to complain one by one, making the whole video call chaotic for almost 10 minutes. you could only smile and shake your head.

after about an hour or so of talking about basically everything and catching up with each other, everyone decided that they should end the call here since it was beginning to get dark and they needed to start practice soon. you bid your goodbye to them once more and ended the call.

you now adverted your attention to the sticky note. reading the letter, you raise both eyebrows. “dream high? that’s not far from here..” you mumbled to yourself. you started to think about everything you know about dream high. you know it’s was about an hour’s journey from where you live. it wasnt really well known either. the overall vibe of the school was mediocre.

however, you felt like you were missing something. something about that school is somehow related to you. you just couldn’t think of an answer despite squeezing all thoughts that you have in your brain. you groan and stood up from your bed and to your desk, proceeding to wanting to write a reply to mark.

hey. sorry if you get this quite late. i was busy video calling my friends. to answer your question, im a third year as well from jookin high. i would ask for your number so we dont have to do this all the time but my friend would scold me saying “but you’re removing the fun out of it.” but anyways, mark aka my soulmate, tell me about yourself, to start off.

you stick the note onto the wall, looking at the row of messages you’ve had recieved so far. you found it weird how the first time you’ve sent the note and got a reply back, it was on the same sticky note, just different handwriting. but you had to write on a new sticky note to send a new message only to get the same sticky note with a different message in return.

you only see his answers lined up on your wall. you started to wonder how this mark guy looked like. is he good looking? what are his hobbies? his attitude towards school? you really wished you could just text him through instagram and not have to go through all this trouble. but that option would earn you a large smack on the back by soyoung and your really didn’t want that.

“do we really need to be here now? like now?!”soyoung whined, while pushing the cart and following behind you while you tossed some packets of frozen bacon. you stopped walking and turn around, nodding your head intensely. soyoung groans and took out her phone, proceeding to use it while still pushing the cart.

you walk around the supermarket, trying to find the ingredients listed on your notes in your phone. it was the weekends and you’re parents were going to be away for a business trip for a week so you thought of inviting soyoung over and making home cooked meals as a bonding session for you two.

after about 30 minutes of gathering the ingredients and having soyoung constantly screaming and fangirling over tiktok edits of jaehyun from NCT. one note: she has yet to know that you know them and that they’re your friends. you figured that it would be best to not let anyone know so as to avoid any situation that would put your friends in a tight spot, since well they’re idols, you were looking for one last item that you had trouble finding.

“soyoung help me! stop watching tiktoks!” you groan, snatching soyoung’s phone away and shoving it in her back pocket. soyoung rolls her eyes lazily and the two of you proceeded to scan the different isles and shelves, looking over every item.

while you were too concentrated looking at the bottom shelves, you felt that you have bumped into someone. you squat down, letting out a soft ‘ouch’ before standing up and looking to see who you bumped into.

“wait. jaemin?” you furrow your eyebrows as you tilt your head, pointing your finger at the guy in front of you. “raven!” you noticed that it was jaemin after all, and both your faces lit up and the same time, grinning widely at each other.

“uhhh..” soyoung says out loud, you and jaemin turn your heads to face soyoung who was behind you. “oh! this is jaemin. we used to be neighbourhood friends before he moved out 4 years ago.” you introduced jaemin to soyoung. jaemin nodded and gave her a bright smile. soyoung only shrugged her shoulders and took out her phone. you turn your attention back to jaemin.

“why are you even here? dont you live quite far?” you ask, your fingers interlocked behind your back. jaemin nods, running a hand through his hair.

“well yes. but we came here to find something that only this supermarket sells.” jaemin replied back, his warm smile never leaving his lips. you smile, reached your hand out to ruffle his hair, laughing softly afterwards. “we? who’re you with?” you stared at jaemin with eyes of suspicion. jaemin started pinching your cheeks, making you whine and begging him to let go.

“with my friend, ray chill. im still single.” jaemin pulled away and folded his arms, pouting. “im sure you’ll find one soon.” you reached out to ruffle his hair and give off a wide smile.

while you and jaemin were catching up and being in your own world, soyoung got too bored of watching the two of you and decided to walk around the supermarket, leaving the cart behind you.

just as she was looking at the drinks isle to get her favourite sweet drink, she sees someone picking up a bunch of bottles one by one and placing them back on the shelve. out of kindness, she decided to help, picking up a bottle and placing it on fhe shelve before looking up to face the guy, who had a straight face while looking at her.

“i was just trying to help. im soyoung.” soyoung smiled, reaching her hand out and waiting for thr guy to greet back. he looked at her but doesn’t respond, proceeding to pick up the last bottle that was seen on the floor. “im jeno.” jeno stands up and nods his head to greet soyoung. soyoung nods back, walking down the isle to grab her drink from the shelve. “have a nice day.” soyoung says before leaving the isle and disappearing out of jeno’s sight. he only shrugged in response and went to do his own thing.

“you met who?!” haechan asks as he takes a sip of his ice cold water. everyone had their heads turned to jaemin, who raised an eyebrow at everyone’s weird expression. “i met my old friend raven. what’s so shocking?” jaemin asks back casually, picking up a few pieces of fries and dipping it into the sauce before shoving it in his mouth.

“dude that’s the name of mark’s soulmate!” haechan screams, making everyone flinch due to the loud noise. “i highly doubt it. there’s plenty of girls in the world with the name raven.” jaemin protests with his mouth full and chugging down gulps of coca cola.

“i mean that’s true. jeno you were with jaemin, right? dont you suspect anything?” renjun starts to question jeno, who was silently playing with his phone. looking up at the others, he gulps.

“i didn’t know he met his friend. i was picking out drinks. i just met a girl named soyoung.” jeno shrugs, taking a bite of his burger. mark scratches the back of his head, now starting to think of the fact that jaemin might have met his soulmate. though he also thought about how that could not be totally possible.

“nah i dont think its her. like really ‘raven’ could be anyone.” mark says, siding with jaemin. haechan tilts his head in awe. “jaemin do you know what school she’s going to?” jaemin only shakes his head.

“i lost all contact with her when i left her neighbourhood. plus we were young. i barely knew her honestly.” the living room falls silent, everyone trying to think of a conclusion to this.

chenle groans, standing up from his seat and slamming his hands on the table, gathering everyone’s attention as their heads shot up. “instead of pondering as if yall are solving some crime, why dont mark just ask her through the sticky note god dammit?” chenle pinches the bridge of his nose.

everyone’s mouths gape open as the room was suddenly filled with ‘ah’s all over. chenle shakes his head. everyone was now looking intensively at mark. mark furrows his eyebrows. “okay guys hold up ill grab the stick note.” mark stands up and takes one bite of his burger before going into his room for awhile and coming out with a sticky note and a pen.

jaemin noticed jeno being silent the whole way. and althought thats normal since its jeno’s nature and personality to not be so outspoken like the others, jaemin could sense that jeno was off and seem to be in deep thoughts.

and jaemin was right. jeno couldnt stop thinking about jaemin’s encounter with ‘raven’. the name sounded so familiar. he tried to recall every girl he has came into contact with during his life. why did he feel like the name was tied to the handwriting he saw on the sticky notes?

“jeno.” jaemin nudged him in the shoulder. jeno mumbled a soft ‘oh’ before turning his attention to mark just like the others. “she didn’t send me a reply after my last one though.” mark says, looking up.

“its fine. she probably didn’t see it. just write already.” chenle says in anticipation. mark shakes his head. “calm the heck down its not like we can get an answer immediately.” mark rolls his eyes and began to write.

hey raven. um i know this may sound weird. but have you gone to a supermarket and met a guy names jaemin? im not a stalker i swear. its just that he’s my friend and apparently you know him. though i dont think that such a coincidence and come by just like that. hope you hear from you soon.

jeno stared at the sticky note that mark proceeded to place at a random wall of the living room while everyone continued to eat and chat. his thoughts finally linked and a imaginary lightbulb appeared on above his head when he finally realises why he was so drawn to mark’s soulmate.

you were focused on wanting to solve a math question when the sticky note above your desk’s wall had fallen in front of you, revealing a new message. you place your pen down and let out a sigh, remembering that you hsve forgotten to write a reply and that mark probably sent you another one.

you tied your hair in a messy low bun before picking up the sticky note to get a closer view. you blink your eyes rapidly as your eyes furrow in awe. what the note said really shocked you and made you freeze in your spot. jaemin is friends with your soulmate? there’s no way.

you sat there for awhile as you constantly read over the words, still in shock with your moutb hanging open. you just couldn’t believe it. was it really what it seemed to be? another thought came to your mind as well. the thought of just who is this friend of jaemin’s? could it be mark? was your soulmate literally in the same place as you yet you never knew?

you grab a fresh new piece of sticky note and proceeded to write a reply after staring at it for so long and thought that it was finally time that you do something.

okay what you wrote really was weird. jaemin’s my old neighbourhood friend. its such a coincidence how you know him. i guess the connections are there. so haha yeah. damn. im very mind blown right now.

you take a look at your handwriting again, smiling to yourself. “i really do love my handwriting.” you mumble under your breath. you stuck the sticky note on the wall and resumed doing your homework, hoping that mark would reply soon.

while the boys were immersed in the horror movie they were watching on friday night, everyone turned their heads to each other when they heard the noise of a piece of paper falling onto the floor. in unison, everyone turned their head to where the noise came from and seeing the sticky note that fell.

jisung grabs the controller and pauses the movie. “we’re watching a scary movie and creepy stuff like that happens?!” jisung asks, stuttering out of complete fear.

mark decided to be the brave one after seeing everyone’s terrified face and stands up to pick up the sticky note, going back to take his seat on the couch soon after. “d-does that always happen?” mark shrugs. “well duh. that’s how i know she sent a reply. it wouldn’t be this scary if we weren’t watching a horror movie.”

everyone’s heads once again gather around mark as he read the note out loud. everyone gapes their mouth open, some covered their mouths while jeno could only stare at it in disbelief. “i guess we’ve confirmed its her.” mark breathes out, placing the sticky note on the table.

jeno reaches out to grab the sticky note to have a look. the unique handwriting that he suspected would belong to you really was yours. out of anger, he tears the sticky notes into two. everyone had their eyes widened at jeno’s sudden shocking action. mark snatches the now torn note back, looking down at them before facing jeno.

“what the heck was that for?!”

“dont talk to her anymore. she’s trouble.”

everyone lets out a sigh in unison except for mark, looking at everyone’s weird reaction. “what do you mean trouble? and why does it look like you all know something except me?” mark furrows his eyes as everyone exchanged glances continuously for a moment.

“she’s just not someone you should be with. that’s all.” jeno stands up and walks to his room, slamming the door shut and produring a piercing noise. the room was silent for awhile until mark speaks up.

“what am i missing here you guys?”

no one replies.

“we’ve been friends for a year and you guys are all keeping secrets for me?” mark scoffs in disbelief, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“we arent in the position to tell you. its jeno.” jaemin murmurs under his breath, looking down on the ground just like the others.

marks keeps silent and stands up from the couch, the palm the torn note was in is balled into a fist as he goes into his room as well.

haechan sighs. “jeno has to tell the truth. he’s been holding onto that grudge almost forever now.”

everyone nods their heads in agreement. “if not, he’s going to live in despair now that he knows she’s his best friend’s soulmate..” jisung adds on.

everyone could only silently hope that things could go well.

after that day you’ve sent a reply, you havent heard from mark since. you dont know why. due to your lack of information on him, it felt as if he disappeared into thin air. although only a week has past by, you felt concerned and somewhat worried for him. did something happen to him? what made him cut off his connection with you? its not like you did anything wrong.

out of pure desperation, you decided to skip school today. youve never skipped school before, and you felt so rebellious and bad. why did you do this? so you could go to dream high and meet mark in person. youve had enough of the sticky notes. you just wanted to see how he was like in real life, not having to think about it through notes.

with a little help from jaemin by texting him on instagram, you knew that mark’s class should be ending by 4pm, and you were there at 3:50 in the canteen where jaemin told you to wait. funny how the security guard lets a student from another school come in with a pass or anything.

you slowly start seeing groups of students going down the flight of stairs that lead to the canteen which had a path leading to the front gates. some eyes glanced at you as they notice someone who doesnt belong at their school, you couldnt care less though. your thoughts were only filled with mark. how he looked like, how he would carry himself. your anticipation was the only thing you felt.

you wore your headphones yet you could suddenly hear a lot of squealing and shouting. you look up, turning you attention to the stairs. a large group of girls crowding around another group of people, who you assumed to be guys. you scoffed, thinking about how there’s always that one group of good looking guys all girls seem to go crazy for. you watch as the group of guys push through the large crowd.

once you got a closer look, you tilt your head to the side. you slowly bring your headphone down from your ears and let them rest on your neck, getting intrigued by how the girls were getting so crazy, even more crazy than the ones from your school.

“its mark! he’s so cute!”

you widen your eyes as you heard the word ‘mark’. you stood up from your seat, peering your head up to find which one is the girl referring to. you only see two guys walking. one smiling sheepishly while the other kept a straight and cold face. just which one is mark?

suddenly, you felt an arm grabbing yours and pulling you back. you jump out of fear and turn around noticing it was jaemin. you calmed your breathing as you look at jaemin.

“meet mark under the block nearby. its too hectic here for you to talk to him.”

jaemin dragged you out of the school grounds and to a secluded block where only a few students where walking past and left you there. you were lost in confusion but decided to trust whatever jaemin was doing, sitting down at a random bench.

“jaemin told us to meet him here where is-”

“raven.”

“what?”

you immediately stood in front of the two guys you saw at the canteen as you notice a familiar face. you werent able to get a clear look at them before, but now you realise that you knew one of them. “jeno..” you look at a different direction a you tried avoiding his gaze, though you knew you couldnt, forcing yourself to meet his eyes.

mark looks at the both of you, utterly confused as his attention shifts from you to jeno constantly. “this raven?” mark points at you, tilting his head. you nod slowly as your turn your head to face mark. you observed his body up and down. he was good looking, just like jeno.. yet his aura told you that he was way more outgoing and open than jeno.

“you look...”

everyone was silent.

you gulp in nervousness. “im busy. bye mark.” before jeno could go, mark pulled on his arm to bring him back to stand beside him, earning a glare from jeno. the one you could never forget. “stay. i know something happened. you were always quiet whenever we talked about this girl. and i also know you all kept something from me.”

you slowly turned to jeno. you could he was annoyed whenever he looked at you. you felt it through his eyes, and it was terrifying. jeno took a deep breath in, folding his arms and placing his weight on one leg.

“if you remember clearly, chenle told you that before we became friends with you, we had a fight and didnt talk to each other for a long time. we didnt tell you this, but it was her who caused it. she brought chaos into our group. everyone forgotten about it clearly, but i cant. after what she did.. i cant forgive her.”

you opened your mouth, wanting to reply but your words were somehow stuck in your throat. you didnt exactly know what to say or do in this awkward situation.

“it.. it was a long time ago jeno, please. my feelings for you were real, even if we werent meant to be. i dont know how many times you need me to say sorry.” you pleaded, biting your lip as you waited for jeno’s reaction.

jeno sighs and runs a hand through his hair as he lets out a huff of rustration. “then why did you leave? you left me stranded, and because of you, i almost left my friends becaused i lived in agony since i missed you so much. i almost pushed everyone away.” you shivered as jeno’s voice started to raise.

you also glanced at mark, who still kept his confused expression on his face. through his gaze never left you as you felt his eyes scanning you body up and down.

“you two used date?” mark asks. you nod in reply.

“we were kids. we didnt know about all this soulmate stuff. but now..”

“you know what? be together. im not going to leave my friends just because of my pent up grudge and feelings. i cant control fate either.”

years had now past since you met mark. it really was fate. the two of you became close in no time and now.. you were fianally married. you couldnt be more happy to be with mark. who you were destined to be really was made for you, and you only. and to think this all escalated due to a note you sent out in pure curiosity.

you still remember what happened with jeno after that day, despite the lack of interaction between you two, jeno was open enough to accept you as his friend again. you are now living a happy life with mark, and always being able to hang out with his group of friends. today was no different.

“haechan get the chilli sauce!” you hear mark shout as you smile widely, feeling his arm snaking around your waist to pull you close. having a barbeque was a great idea to celebrate jisung’s birthday.

you soon see haechan with the bottle of chilli sause, placing it on the table where everyone gathered around the table which had jisung’s birthday cake. “before we do anything with the cake, let me announce my wish.” jisung announces proudly. you raise an eyebrow. “you cant say you birthday wish out loud!” you scolded jisung, but everyone laughs.

“his wish is something we all know.” jeno says, winking playfully at you. you tilt your head in confusion when you suddenly feel mark’s arm leaving you waist. you look over to mark who was shoving his hand into his pocket as if to find something.

you were completely clueless when mark nods towards jisung, to show some kind of signal. “i wish for mark and raven to get married!” jisung shouts.

you gaped your mouth open in shock when mark pulls out a small box, opening it in front of you to show a ring. you cover your mouth in disbelief. “did you guys really-”

“please marry me, raven. my sticky note soulmate.” you hear everyone clapping s a tear of happiness drips from your cheek. you quickly wipe it away as you heard the nickname that mark gave you. “we wouldnt normally do this but it was jeno that suggested this.”

you look over to jeno who had a soft smile on his face as he nod his head. looking back at mark, you grin widely as more tears started flowing out. “of course ill marry you, you dork.”

92 notes · View notes

hidden-otaku-stuff · 5 years ago

Text

Lockscreens (ch. 2)

tw: Drinking

Word count: 2.9k

Genre: Angst, fluff

All trigger warnings will be tagged and posted at the beginning of each chapter! This will have *manga spoilers*

Pairings: Bokuto x fem!reader, Kuroo x fem!reader

Summary: Nearly four years ago, Bokuto left the love of his life for volleyball. Despite all the time, he’s still very much in love with her. He comes home to a major surprise leaving him wondering…What happened while he was gone?

Masterlist | prev | next

ch 2: Broken and New Promises (Month 1)

Nearly four years ago...

“Babe, guess what?” She looked up from the tea-cup that sat in front of her, over the pastries as (e/c) eyes made contact with gold. Her eyebrows quirked up as she took a sip, swallowing it and her apprehension. She had invited her boyfriend to their favorite cafe to tell him some life-changing news. “I just got scouted!” Her eyes widened, choking slightly on the hot beverage.

“Really? That’s great!”

“Yeah, it’s a two-year contract for now. They want to send me to their training camp starting next week and I’ll be gone for the next six months. After that, I’m going to officially join the team and everything!” A soft pout made its way to his face as he played with his fingers. “That means I have to leave this weekend.”

Delicately placing the tea-cup down, a soft hand reached out for his. “Kou, it’s okay. This is the opportunity you’ve been looking for all of your life.” With a thick swallow, she steeled her nerves. “I’m not going to keep you here. Please, go live your life and you better be the best ace out there, okay?”

“We can make this work! I’ll come home to visit, and we’ll call every day, I promise.”

A sad smile; a clenched fist under the table. “I’m sure we can.”

“I love you.” A kiss to her hand.

A squeeze from hers. “I love you too.”

****

It wasn’t long before those promises were being broken. It started with skipping the ‘good morning’ and ‘good night’ texts. Then it became unresponded texts spanning over multiple days. Phone calls were missed. Video-calls were forgotten and ignored. Visits planned and cancelled. The phone rang. (Name) glanced down at her purse at the sound, pulling the phone out. “Hello?”

“Hey, (Name)! Was wondering, have you heard from Bokuto recently?”

“No, I haven’t.” She couldn’t bring herself to smile. “He’s been busy with his new team.” A veiled sigh. The phone was squeezed between her shoulder and ear as she readjusted her basket.

“I’m not even surprised, it’s only been a month since he’s left after all. He was supposed to come back for the Gym 3 reunion dinner this weekend but nobody’s really heard from him in the group-chat.”

She let out a soft laugh. “I’m surprised you and the others still have time to meet up.” (Name) bent down, comparing two different packs of vitamins.

“Yeah well, I like to remember my roots unlike some people.” His laughter warmed her heart. “Say, even though Bokuto isn’t coming, we still want you there! I’m sure the others prefer you over him anyways. Besides, I miss my best friend!”

A gentle hum in response as she reviewed her calendar. “This weekend right? I should be free, just send me the details.”

“Great! See you soon.” She ended the call, staring at her phone screen for a moment longer. It was a picture of (Name) and Bokuto underneath the sakura trees, petals falling onto their heads as she pressed a kiss to his cheek. Another drawn out sigh before she locked the phone, tucking it away to finish running errands as she placed a bottle of vitamins into her basket.

****

“Hey, you made it!” (Name) stepped into the restaurant, glancing around only to find a tall, dark-haired idiot waving his arms aggressively.

“I said I was coming, didn’t I?” Her good-natured laugh made the others around the table break out into chuckles. Kuroo patted the empty seat beside him, gesturing for her to take it. “Where’s Akaashi?” (E/c) eyes scanned the table. Across from her, Tsukishima was sitting beside Lev, looking as if he’d rather be anywhere else but there. An empty seat was left on Kuroo’s other side.

“He couldn’t make it. Something about deadlines.”

“Guess the Fukurodani boys aren’t loyal to their roots,” she teased, elbowing Kuroo. His loud laugh caught the eyes of the rest of the patrons as she rolled hers. Kuroo always had an obnoxious laugh, one that fit his messy hair.

“At least you came.” He pulled her into a side-hug. “Missed you, Manager-chan.” Soon enough, they had all placed their orders. Smiling behind her glass of water, she observed as Lev and Kuroo finished their beers, bellies shaking with the roar of their laughter. Tsukishima wasn’t quite as vocal, but his cheeks had also become tinged pink from the beer. Kuroo wiped a tear away from his eye, trying to speak before Lev made another comment that sent the older male into another fit of laughter.

“So, how have you been, Tsukishima?” She sent the boy a sympathetic smile, coaxing him to join in the conversation.

“You know you can just call me Kei,” the boy rolled his eyes, cheeks becoming slightly more bright. “I’ve been good, just focusing on school work. How are you (L.Name)-san?”

“And I told you years ago, Kei, call me (Name),” she giggled, taking another sip of water. “I’ve been okay, just about finished with my degree.”

“Right, what are you studying again?”

She cleared her throat, ignoring the other boys who began another round of beers. “I went to school for sports medicine.”

“And it’s all because of me!” Kuroo proclaimed, throwing an arm around her shoulder. Warm breath tainted with beer blew on her face.

She rolled her eyes. “Keep telling yourself that if it helps you sleep at night.” She looked back to her audience jabbing a thumb at her former captain, “Kuroo ended up throwing his back out like the old man he is, so I ended up helping him with his rehabilitation.” The smile froze for a second, contemplating the secondary reason why she had chosen this route. All along she had known that Bokuto had plans to become a professional athlete. Going pro had always been his sense of normal. Her chosen path had made sense at the time if she had wanted to follow besides him on his climb to success. Them against the world. Another broken promise.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Kuroo’s loud whine. “I’m not an old man!”

Immediately, she and Lev replied, “yes you are.”

Kuroo clicked his tongue in dismissal, finishing his beer. He placed it down, smacking his lips. “This has been fun. Why don’t we head back to my place and watch a movie or something?”

“Can’t, got an exam coming up,” Tsukishima replied immediately, as they all stood up to make their way out.

“I promised my sister I would help her move tomorrow. She just got a job offer so she’s moving to be closer to it.” Lev whined. All three boys turned to look at her. A moment of hesitation.

“Sure, I don’t have anything to do tomorrow.” With that, she hugged the other boys good-bye as they walked off together in the opposite direction. “I’m guessing you didn’t drive?” She glanced at the tall former captain beside her. At the shake of his head, she escorted him to her car, unlocking it for him to get in.

“Wow this is small.” He groaned, his head accidentally hitting the roof as he clambered in.

“You’re just freakishly big, Kuroo.” She teased, starting it as she reversed. Soft music played as they let the silence wash over them. The only interruptions came from Kuroo as he navigated her to his complex. Soon enough, they were standing in his living room. She stepped in, not having been there since Kuroo had first moved in. “It looks much homier now,” she commented, slipping her coat off as she hung it up on the hook.

“Kuroo, where do you want this box?” (Name) called, stepping in through the doorway only to be greeted with a loud crashing noise followed by a loud curse.

“Bokuto! I said over there, not here!” Kuroo jabbed his hand in the direction of the kitchen, scolding her boyfriend. Kuroo rubbed his foot, having kicked the box on accident. The box laid on its side, photo frames spilling out.

“I’m sorry, I thought you meant here!” Bokuto argued, crossing his arms and pouting. “I don’t wanna help anymore.”

“I was gone for five minutes.” She sighed, lips slightly pursed as she placed the box of kitchen supplies down on the counter before bending down to collect the frames. “Babe, can you just go get another box from the truck?” Bokuto bent down, hugging her around the shoulders. He peppered kisses along the side of her face. Bokuto huffed, his warm breath bathing her neck and causing goosebumps to prickle through her skin.

“Do I have to?”

“Please babe? The sooner we finish here, the sooner we can head home and cuddle.” He sprang up, giving her one last peck on the cheek before disappearing down the stairs. (Name) picked up a sleek black frame, turning it over to reveal chubby smiling faces. “I didn’t know you still had this.”

Kuroo crouched down besides her, looking at the photo. It was a photo of them on their first day of middle-school. She was in a yellow frilly sundress, her hair in pig-tails. Kuroo was beside her, boyish cheeks puffed in a wide smile. He wore a blue t-shirt with a photo of a dog on it and yellow shorts. He snorted. “Of course I do, you looked absolutely ridiculous in that.”

“Those yellow shorts didn’t do you any favors either,” she rolled her eyes, fixing the box so it sat up properly as she tucked the frame back into it. They looked around the apartment. Brown boxes were stacked everywhere, and the only furniture available was a wooden table in the living room. “Where’s the rest of the furniture?”

“Ah right, I should help Bokuto bring that in.”

“Well, that happens when you live somewhere for awhile,” he chuckled, hand reaching up to scratch at the back of his neck. The other hand gently guided her to the living room by the small of her back. “Pick something, I’m gonna change and get you something more comfortable to wear.” She hummed in response, tapping the buttons on the remote to select some random wildlife documentary before a sound interrupted her. Turning her head, she looked at Kuroo as he slipped back into the room, wearing an old volleyball tshirt and shorts. “Here you are,” he tossed her a shirt and shorts.

“Thank you,” she replied, heading to the restroom. As she undressed, she couldn’t help but look at her stomach in the light, examining it at all angles. She had worn a loose sweater earlier. She let out a soft sigh. She’d have to start investing in more loose-fitting clothes. A sudden wave of nausea hit her as she flung herself onto the toilet, dry-heaving.

“Hey, (Name)—” The door creaked open as Kuroo knocked on it, she hadn’t closed it all the way. He stopped, eyes widening at her as fear-stricken eyes met his face. “Are you…”

“Yes.”

Kuroo shook his head, gently closing the door as he stepped back out to give her some privacy. She scolded herself as she cleaned up after herself. She had been hiding the secret for a while now, she hadn’t planned on letting her friends know quite yet. (Name) didn’t even know what her relationship status was anymore ever since Bokuto had left to pursue his professional career. Stepping out, she tugged the red t-shirt down more. Kuroo was seated on the couch, fingers interlocked as he stared passively at the frozen TV screen. She slipped behind the couch, coming around to the other end as she took a seat at the very end. “How long?”

A deep gulp. “Two months.”

“His?” Kuroo’s eyes left the screen, hazel eyes piercing hers. Biting her bottom lip, she could only nod. “Are you keeping it?” A moment of hesitation before she nodded. “Does he know?” She tore her face away, swallowing thickly as shame surged through her. “Why didn’t you tell him?”

“I didn’t want him to give up his career for me.” Her soft words broke the silence. Kuroo sighed, moving to sit closer to her. A warm hand pulled hers away from her lap.

“You didn’t have to be alone through this.” Fingers tilted her chin back to his face. “You know I would’ve been there in a heartbeat.”

“I didn’t want to be a burden.”

At this, he snorted. “(Name), you’re one of my closest and oldest friends. When have you ever been a burden?” A small smile made its way to her face. Gentle hands pulled her head into his chest, a hand lightly stroking her hair. “Even if you don’t want Bokuto involved here, I want to be. You can’t get rid of me that easily, especially now that I know.” He pressed his lips against her forehead, his warm breath fanning across her face. “Now, let’s watch this documentary!” He pulled back, a wide grin appearing on his face.

****

The next morning, she woke up in an unfamiliar place. In the corner of her eye sitting on Kuroo’s desk, she caught a glimpse of two familiar kids beaming back. Her nose violently twitched as the smell of oil invaded her senses. Launching herself onto her feet, she disappeared into the restroom heaving over the porcelain throne. Behind her, she heard curses and loud foot-steps. “(Name)?” Kuroo made his way behind her, pulling her hair back as she retched. ‘Just like old times,’ she thought, remembering all the times she, Bokuto, and Kuroo had gone to town in the clubs and bars during the earlier years of college. “Shh, it’s okay,” Kuroo whispered, rubbing her back as she groaned. Panting, she wiped her mouth on the back of her hand, grimacing. “Are you okay?”

She waved him off. “Just morning sickness.”

“Have you been to the doctor’s yet?” She shook her head. “Don’t be stupid, you’re already eight weeks in.” She flushed the toilet, feeling her nausea subside. Standing up, she washed her hands. Kuroo left as she examined her reflection. Her skin was pale, beads of sweat dotted her forehead. She smacked her lips, face twisting at the taste. Kuroo reappeared, handing her an unopened toothbrush. “Toothpaste is in the cupboard,” he said, leaving her to her own devices.

Quickly freshening up, she was greeted with the sight of two plates of grilled fishes and rice as she stepped back out to the living room. Another wave of nausea crashed over her, but she swallowed back the acrid taste. “Kuroo,” she sent him a glum expression. “That looks delicious, but I’m afraid I don’t think I can eat it.”

He frowned, “It’s never too early to give your baby docosahexaenoic acid, (Name)!”

She rolled her eyes, laughing as she made her way into his kitchen to make herself some natto and miso soup. “Of course you’d say that, Kuroo.” Turning back to the stove, she gestured for him to eat. “But unfortunately the oily nature is making me a tad nauseous.” She tapped her nose.

“Ahh, that’s fair. I’m sorry, I’ll keep that in mind.” At this, she stopped slicing the tofu to give him an incredulous look.

“And why’s that?”

He smirked at her. “Well I did promise to help you, didn’t I?”

She turned back to her cooking, cheeks flushing. “You don’t actually have to follow through with that,” she mumbled. “You were tipsy when you said it anyways.”

“Oh hush,” he waved her off as he took another bite of the fish. “You took care of us all those years in high-school. You’ve taken care of me for most of our lives. This is the least I can do for you.”

“Well aren’t you chivalrous,” she teased, fiddling with a knob on the stove.

He swallowed his mouthful of rice, “now, do you have a doctor in mind already or do I need to go search for one?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll make an appointment after this is finished,” she promised, shooting him a look. He stood up, collecting his empty dishes and placed them in the sink.

Looking at her ingredients, he sent her a cheeky smile. “Mind making me some too?” He picked up the second meal, neatly arranging it into a bento before he placed those dishes into the sink as well.

“Only because you took the couch and made me breakfast,” she replied, bumping his hip with hers. Kuroo sent her a sly grin, before heading back to the table to pull out his laptop. As she finished up her meal, she and Kuroo caught up on life. Prior to this, they hadn’t seen each other in over a month. Her phone was filled with unopened messages and missed calls from everyone but the person she wanted the most. She placed the bowl of miso soup beside him, glancing at his laptop. “What are you up to?”

He tilted the screen back in response, revealing the web-page. “Just doing some pregnancy research, my dear (Name).”

She thumped him on the forehead before she took a seat across from him. “You really don’t have to do that,” she reminded him. “I was already fully prepared for raising this child alone if it came down to it.”

He glanced up from the screen, raising his eyebrow at her. Kuroo cleared his throat. “That may be the case, but you don’t have to go through the pregnancy alone.” Leaning forward, he ruffled her hair causing her to scowl at him. “I’m your best friend, (Name). Just let me help!”

“Sure, sure, whatever you say Kuroo.” They sat in silence. Kuroo continued doing his research while she contemplated the implications of Kuroo’s promise.

Taglist: @toaster-stick @thatartsybitch @brazil-hinata @sawamooora @lastminaddition @anejuuuuoy @abby-rutledge20 @babybluebisexual @badboysdoitbetter2 @liathachcapricious @cosmiclunas @wishingforanother (If your name is bolded, I had trouble tagging you!)

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 5 years ago

Text

From Eden: Two

Warnings: noncon sexual acts, mentions of mental illness; tags to be added throughout series

This is dark!Bucky. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: The mc suffers from agoraphobia. After a new neighbour moves in across the street, her home becomes even more of a prison.

Note: Yo, so here’s part 2! I hope you all enjoy. As before, there is a transcript at the end for anyone having issues with the images.

Thank you so much for your patience! And support!!

As always, if you are so inclined, please like, reblog, and comment. <3

Transcript:

Sunday

I called Dr. Tisha this morning. I told her about the neighbour. She said it was nice of him to help with the garden but ignored me when I mentioned the broken gate. I don’t know if she believed me. It didn’t seem like it.

She’s coming by tomorrow to check on my progress. That means I can’t keep those magazines on the dining table anymore. The last time she made me throw half of them out. She didn’t listen when I told her some were so old they were priceless. Sometimes it feels like she doesn’t listen to me at all. Well, what do I pay her to do then?

I haven’t been back outside. I should water the garden as it’s only getting hotter but I don’t appreciate the unwanted audience. An intruder!

Later

I still haven’t found the courage to venture out. I made sure the bike lock was still in place from the front door. It is. Though, if that man’s metal hand could break the old lock, it will likely shred the chain lock.

Thinking about it makes my heart race. I should go lay down. I’m dizzy and the humidity is making me sick to my stomach. Or maybe it’s something else.

Monday

Dr. Tisha came by early today.

I showed Dr. Tisha where I kept my medicine in the bathroom cabinet, the pills divided into the days. I check off each day on the calendar so I don’t forget either. She said that was good. The last time she was here, it was because I’d stopped taking the pills so I hope this made her happy.

Then she walked through the house, she said she was happy to see the top of the table this time. I laughed but it wasn’t really funny. Then she went to the kitchen and checked all the drawers.

She found some books hidden under the sink and asked if I’d ever read them. I mean to but haven’t yet. She took them to the guest room where she found the bins of books stacked in the corner. Better than last time when they were a pile on the carpet.

She said I have too many things. Too many things that aren’t mine. She says it’s okay to be sad about grandma but that holding onto all her stuff won’t bring her back. Like I don’t know that! I do know! But she left me these things so yes, they are mine.

Then we went to grandma’s old room. It’s the same as it was. As it’s always been. Dr. Tisha frowned and went to my room next.

She asked me about the broken bed frame. I told her it was nothing. I made sure to replace the duvet I’d dragged out the couch to sleep without threat of rolling onto the floor in my sleep. Not that I sleep very much.

She opened my closet and found the magazines. That didn’t impress her either.

We had tea in the kitchen and talked. She asked me how I was feeling. About side effects and all that. Besides the occasional bout of nausea and vivid dreams, I’m fine. She agrees.

Then she asked about the tall shelf of vinyls in the living room. Which one is my favourite? I told her the old Vera Lynn record reminded me of grandma and it was still on the needle.

Then we argued. She wants me to get rid of the ones I don’t listen to. And the magazines in my closet! And she wants me to go through all the books, too.

She also suggested that I think about redecorating. I told her I didn’t want to do any of that. I like the house the way it is. Who is it hurting if I have a few extra books laying around?

She calmed me down after I raised my voice. She made me count my breaths and explained that I don’t have to get rid of everything, just a little. She says it would help with my progress. And, she said, I could probably make a healthy profit off a yard sale.

Well, I don’t care about the money, I don’t want to have a sale. I don’t want to deal with people and them thumbing through grandma’s thing for pennies.

Dr. Tisha said she’ll make some signs and we’ll have the sale on Saturday. My task for the week is to decide what to sell and prices. We argued again but not very long.

When she left, I started crying. Everywhere I look, I see grandma and this place is empty enough without her.

Tuesday

Lorena showed up today.

I gave her my list, it wasn’t very long. She asked about the bike lock and I asked if she could stop by the hardware store and get a new mechanism. She asked me if I even knew how to fix it. I said I’d figure it out.

I told her about Dr. Tisha’s idea for the yard sale. She said it was a great idea. I still don’t agree but she offered to help me sort through the guest room. I shrugged and asked her how long she’d be at the store. She said the usual and left.

I waited by the door. I watched the front gate for her return. She had the combination to the bike lock now and could let herself in. I just wanted her to come back and drop everything off so I could be alone.

When she did return, she wasn’t alone. I saw her at the gate, fumbling with the lock. As the gate shifted open, a metal arm reached past her to push it all the way. The man held a paper bag in his other arm as Lorena carried the other.

He was smiling as he spoke to her and let her pass. He followed her to the door and he saw me before I could back away from the slated window in the door.

“Open up,” Lorena called as she tapped the door.

I didn’t know what else to do but open the door. When I did she handed me her bag and reached for the one the man held.

“Sorry, but… I can’t let you inside.” She said glumly. “But thanks for the help.”

“No problem.” He glanced past her and I tried to hide behind her but he’s taller than her. He’s very big up close. “You have a great day. Both of you.”

“You, too.” Lorena said and he strode away.

When the gate clattered closed I waited until I was sure he was gone. I dropped my bag and rushed to check the lock. He’d secured it. Good.

I went back to the house and locked the door too. Lorena already had both bags on the table.

“He didn’t mean any harm,” She said as she unpacked the groceries. “He was just helping me so I figured--”

“You shouldn’t have let him in.” I told her.

“He was only in the yard. He didn’t come into the house.”

“I could have helped you.” I said.

“When’s the last time you went past the gate?” She asked as she pulled out a small plastic bag and slid it across to me. It was the new lock. “That should fit, if you can figure it out.”

“That’s not the point, Lor,” You slapped the table. “You let him into my space. A stranger!”

“He’s your neighbour. I’ve talked to Dr. Tisha and you know you’re supposed to be working on your socialising. This yard sale will be a good first step.”

“This yard sale is bull shit,” I was so angry I could have yelled. “I like being alone. I like it here. This is my home and these are my things!”

“Calm down.” She set down the carton of milk and neared me. “Look, I’m sorry. You’re right. I should’ve asked before I let him past the gate.”

I felt so tired. Suddenly weak, like the air had been let out of me. I felt bad for being so mad with her after she went all the way to town for me.

“I’m sorry I got upset.”

She forgave me and I forgave her. She convinced me to fill one bin for the sale before the end of the day. She left shortly after. Her and Shelby are going to see a movie. I’m watching one too. An old black and white movie Grandma had on her shelf of cassettes. It’s interesting but the edges are fuzzy and the audio is muffled.

Oh, well, I’m tired. And I’ll be sleeping on the couch anyway.

Wednesday

I tried to fix the lock today. I haven’t been outside that long since last week. The garden needs to be watered.

I took out grandma’s old toolbox, the tools half-rusted but intact. I got what was left of the old lock off easily but the new one was more of a task to get in. I had to open the gate to get it in. The holes for the screw were off-kilter but I couldn’t turn the lock enough to get them to line up.

Then he showed up. That man. Bucky. The lock slipped out as he scared me and my screw driver hit my shoe. My toe still hurts.

“You need some help?” He asked.

I shook my head and tried to close the gate on him but he was already picking up the mechanism and screwdriver.

“I can do it.” I sound like a dying mouse. I reached for the lock but he didn’t even seem to notice. “Hold the door steady and I’ll just--”

“I can do it myself,” I said louder but he still didn’t seem to hear me. Or chose not to.

He reached around the gate and pulled it closer to him. I grabbed the bars and he slid the lock into place. His metal fingers shifted it and aligned the holes.

“Do you have the screws?” He asked.

I found the box on the bunch of rocks just beside the gate. I handed him each long screw and he easily twisted them into place.

“There ya go,” He gave the screwdriver back and smiled.

I closed the gate, as good as pushing him out of the yard. He let me but looked confused. I took the key from the box and slid it in the slot. I turned it and the click slowed my racing heart.

“I still don’t know your name,” He said.

I didn’t tell him and left him there. You think he’d get the clue.

Thursday

It’s not even 5am. I woke up in a sweat. The fan is dead and the house has grown stolid, even as the night air slips through the open window.

I thought I’d closed it more but it is wide open and the power is out. There is an eerie silence as the buzz of the fridge is entirely gone and the house is pitch black.

I swear I saw something move in the window. Maybe a bird?

I tried to get back to sleep but it’s too hot. I guess I’ll just sit and wait for the sun to rise. It’s already starting to.

I want to go out in the garden today. I just hope that man doesn’t bother me again. I hope the lock is still in place.

Friday

Well, yesterday was fine. The power came back on at noon as I watered the garden and trimmed some overgrown plants. The freesias had grown despite my neglect.

Today was just as boring. I read at the patio table for a while but then the phone started ringing. Dr. Tisha was checking in. She said she put the signs up yesterday and hoped the turn out would be good. She asked me how much I got done. I lied and said a lot.

Now I’m going to go sort through the guest room and toss a few records on top to get her off my back. I guess I’ll just have to hide under the table tomorrow.

Saturday

Everytime I think I’m doing better, it all goes so bad!

Dr. Tisha and Lorena arrived early to set up the yard sale. They unfolded a table just inside the gate, leaving it wide open, and helped me arrange everything on top of it. I was nervous and tired. I didn’t sleep very much.

I waited nervously and the first customer showed up. Gladys, an old friend of Grandma’s. She bought an old pin cushion and the Miles Davis record. I should have kept that.

I watched mostly as Dr. Tisha and Lorena took the money and helped people, both familiar and not.

Dr. Tisha made me introduce myself to them at least. I hated it but they were mostly friendly. A woman with two children, I think she said her name was Essie? She said she liked my shirt. That was nice.

But then he showed up! I ignored him at first as he played with the ornamental cowbell. He took that and a few records from the table. He didn’t even seem to notice Dr. Tisha or Lorena as he came to me.

I kept my head down as I lined up the thimbles beside the painted sewing box.

“How much for the records?” He asked.

I didn’t say anything and went to the other end of the table. He followed and I turned back and went back to the other end again. He followed me. Again.

“Now,” Tisha stopped me. “What are you doing? He asked you a question.”

I looked up and blinked dumbly. “What? I didn’t-- I was--”

“Bucky,” Lorena greeted him as she neared. “Tisha, this is the neighbour who helped with the groceries the other day.”

“Oh, hello,” She held out her hand as she blocked me from getting away. “I’m Tisha.”

She introduced me then and told me like a child to say hello. I did, quietly.

“Are you… the one who gave her the flowers?” Tisha asked.

“I did.” He smiled. “But I guess she already has enough.”

“She’s shy,” Tisha lowered her voice. “She’s working on it. Now,” she turned to me, “how much do you want for the records… and bell?”

I didn’t know what to say. The man watched me and I felt as if I would melt.

“Come on.” Tisha poked me. “We talked about this, right? This is your sale.”

“Ten dollars each,” I doubled the price. “And twenty for the bell.”

“That’s a bit pricey,” Lorena said. I shrugged.

“Sounds fair to me,” The man took out his wallet as he leaned the record on the table beneath the bell and used his leg to keep it from falling. “I’ve never listened to these bands before and I’m trying to expand my library.”

He held out the money. Tisha had to elbow me to get me to take it. I snatched it from him and counted it. Another elbow as Lorena kept me from turning away.

“Thank you,” I said to him.

“I hope you enjoy the records,” Tisha offered gently before she pulled me aside.

She took me closer to the house as Lorena watched the table. She lowered her voice. “What’s going on?” She asked.

“Nothing.” I lied.

“Nothing? Why were you so rude to him?”

“I don’t like him.”

“You don’t know him.” She insisted.

“I don’t want to.”

“Look, I know you’re uneasy around men, but he was nice. And he’s your neighbour. You’ll be seeing a lot of him so I think you should at least try to be friendly. And remember what I said about friends?”

“My only friend is dead.”

I was so upset I ran inside. And now I’m locked in my room, waiting for them all to just go away.

#bucky barnes #dark bucky barnes #dark!bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #dark bucky barnes x reader #dark!bucky barnes x reader #fic #dark fic #dark!fic #series #from eden #agoraphobia #mcu #marvel

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chayacat · 4 years ago

Text

Devil’s Sweet Star (1)

Fandom: Dead by Daylight

Ghostface x Female Reader

Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut

***

Finally. After months and months of searching for a suitable space, you have found it. Even if it means leave Indiana. After all, you no longer have anything to hold you back there and a change of landscape will do the greatest good. You’ve moved to Roseville, Ohio in order to open your own coffee shop and found locals curious but welcoming to you. Your new apartment, big enough for a couple is certainly simple but with all the decorations you have in your boxes, you will make it as comfortable and warm as you can. You get your apartment keys from James Lawson your landlord, an adorable old man who lives with his wife for forty years.

He warned you about the hot water system that was shared among all residents, so keep it in mind if you don’t want to have some complaint from them. Rent is reasonable and if you have any problem or just want to talk, you just have to knock on his door.

“One last thing young girl! Be careful outside! With these little hooligans, filthy little scoundrels who give no respect for their elders, smoking their bullshit drugs and...” he said becoming grumpier before his wife puts his hand on his shoulder

“Calm down my dear...think of your heart. But I agree and that’s not the worst. Robbery and aggressions happen often if they saw you weak or alone. Just for...Fun as they said. It's really worrying to see such a thing when they could do something better for everyone.” She said.

“No worries! If someone try to piss me off, I'll just kick his ass! It’s not the first time and I know it wouldn’t be the last. As my father said: hit a man where it hurts! But thanks for warning me anyway. You answer with that smile of yours before going to your car get your boxes.

It was exhausting and you sigh in relief when you put the last box on the ground to close the door behind you. After two hours of household and storage with some music to give you motivation, you decide to go out to take care of what will soon be your coffee shop. Located two blocks away, the old building, once a diner, was bigger than you thought. Fortunately, the companies you hired to do work have finished the day before, all that remains is to place the material and decorations, tables and chairs and wait for the delivery of coffee.

“Damn it’s much bigger than I expected. But that’s not bad after all! Still...I have to find a name. Not always the easiest part. The Nebula? Galaxia? Sugar Star?” you said tilting your head thinking of many names as you enter into the shop.

Everything was as you imagine. From walls to the smallest decorations, everything, without overloading, reminded space. Pleasant, relaxing, a real place to escape after a busy and stressful day while drinking a good coffee and devouring a slice of pie or other pastry. You start to organise everything, placing seats, tables and chairs to maximize space allowing future customers to move freely without getting in the way. Suddenly you hear someone knocking on the door and when you turn to see who it is, you notice a woman, in her forties, wearing an apron adorned with flowers that stood in front of the entrance.

“Wow...I didn’t think this place would change that much. and I love it! Much more than Joe's old dinner. I assume you're the new owner? I’m Lindsey Parson, I own the flower shop” she said with a bright smile offering her hand.

“Yes ma’am! Nice to meet you!” you answer as you introduced yourself shaking her hand.

“I hope you’ll enjoy Roseville. And that your business will succeed. When do you think you're going to open it?

“Oh...Well if all goes well, I think I could welcome my first customers on Wednesday! I just have to...find a name.”

“It's always the hardest thing to do when you open a business. I’m sure you’ll find it. And if you want, I can talk about your coffee to my friends. They’ll be delighted to go in a new place to share some news over a good coffee or tea.

“Thanks a lot! that’s really nice of you! I think I’ll be happy to live here than in Indiana.”

“If he’s not decided to make you his prey...” whispered Lindsey turning her face outside slightly worried.

You tilted you head at her words. His prey? Who? Who is she talking about? She breathes deeply and turn her face again to you with a little smile like she doesn’t want to scare you. Not when you’ve just arrived here.

“You know I'm not afraid about some weirdo punk or pervert bastard. If someone looks for troubles, I’ll kick them where it hurts: nuts or ass they’ll choose.” you reply by shrugging your shoulders.

“You’ve got guts, but it won't stop Ghostface from killing you if he decided to make you his next victim. Since many months, he killed many persons and no one know who is he. He’s a real shadow, stalking you and waiting for the perfect moment to hit his victim. Even if you’re not afraid, you should be careful, because he will not give you time or opportunity to defend yourself or run away.” said Lindsey.

“Great. I always move in at the right moment. Well, I guess I'm cursed or something.” you say with a sigh. “Cops have no leads to find him? he must have left traces, clues! no crimes and criminals are perfect. Except in thrillers.”

“He’s not called Ghostface for nothing girl. With him It’s like you try to catch the air in your hand, he plays and makes fun of the cops. He humiliates them and it pissed them off. So please, take care of yourself. and If you see something weird call the cops immediately. Well, I’m going back to my shop. See you around! And good luck!”

She waves her hand, and you wave back at her before she leaves. A few minutes later, you leave the coffee shop making sure all the doors are closed. Since coffee delivery doesn't arrive until tomorrow morning, you have the rest of the day and tomorrow to find a name. the hardest is yet to come. You make your way at home and once you arrive, you park and read the newspaper you bought on the road. After what you’ve heard from Lindsey, you better know more about that Ghostface guy. If cops don’t have any clues about him, the journalist who made the article on the other hand, named Jed Olsen, seems to make a real investigation work.

It's real impressive to see how many details he wrote about the last murder and the victim, a young man named Travis Maloney. Maybe he’s an experienced journalist, working for 25 years, in the fifties, dressed surely with old suspender pants, a slightly mis tied tie, dual focus glasses and an onset of baldness. And also, some smell of tobacco that smokes your nostrils. Imagine all this makes you wince, hope you will never deal with this guy, you will be good at disinfecting the whole apartment after. Once in the building you go to your mailbox to pick up the mail you have transferred as well as some advertisements. As you reach your home, you turned the corner and lost in your throughs you met with someone’s nose.

“Ouch...damn It hurts. I’m so sorry I wasn’t paying attention. Are you okay? “you start to say before raising your head to your unfortunate interlocutor.

Then you freeze. He was a little taller than you, his coppery blond hair almost approaching red, slightly wavy, came to the shoulders to fits his thin face. He was wearing a black shirt covered by a khaki jacket, black pants and shiny brown dress shoes. But what attracted you the most was his piercing blue eyes hidden behind thin rectangular glasses. He’s handsome, even if he looks like a nerdy boy. He groaned a little as he rubbed his nose before looking at you.

“Well...at least I can say it’s a way to say hello. I'm fine my nose is not fallen so...you can breathe you need more strength to broke it.” He laughed putting his glasses back in place. “What about you?”

“I’m okay, my brain still okay...even if sometimes I should use it more often to avoid something like this.” You answer with a nervous laugh as you introduced yourself. “You sure everything is okay? I didn’t break your glasses or anything?!”

“No worries really.” He assured with an angelic smile. Damn he looks like an angel. “Anyways, I have to change them sooner or later so...it’s doesn’t matter. Nice to meet you, I'm Jed Olsen, it’s seems like you’re my new neighbour, I live the door right next to you.”

You froze again. Okay. Do you remember what you thought before about him? Forget it. Jed Olsen is not an old man that stinks of tobacco but that handsome nerdy boy right in front of you. More he is your neighbour. You mentally slap yourself to have disfigured him in this way.

“Jed? I don’t want to be rude but you look very young to carry a name too ... Old. When I hear that name, I feel like we're talking about someone who has fifty / sixty years old...No offence.” You reply a little embarrassed.

“Let’s just say my parents considered me as a mistake. Maybe that’s why they gave me this old name. To remind me that I was not wanted” said Jed.

“Sorry. But at least they wrong! Look at you! You pull off the nerd look very well! If all the nerds, and more all men were physically like you, this would-be paradise on Earth!”

Oh Shit...did you just say this out loud? Yes, you do, and you mentally slap yourself again to say that JUST in front of him. Jed’s eyes blinked for several seconds, a little surprised about what you say before giving you a little smile scratching the back of his head.

“Well, I got to go! I still have storage to do in the apartment and I have to think about two, three little things! You laughed awkwardly “H-have a nice day! See ya !”

You walk fast to your home door, quickly open and close it after entering inside. You facepalm yourself many times, cursed you in all languages.

“Good job, pickle brain! For a first good impression It’s a failure. He's going to think I'm an idiot and pervert as a bonus. What did is done anyway...I should focus on the coffee for now. I will find a way to apologize to him later. But first a shower is welcomed! I smell like a camel...and I'm being polite.”

You spend the rest of the day thinking about the name of your pastries, in harmony with the theme of the coffee as well as the very name of the coffee shop. If it was easy enough for the first one, you come out empty-handed in your name search for your shop. As Lindsey says, it's not the easier part. And she's right.

***

(Well, this is the first time I write a fiction and especially an English fiction because I’m a French potato x) Sorry if my English causes headaches XD Do not hesitate to tell me what you think, I take all positive/negative/neutral opinions! This will allow me to improve my writing talent which is at the same level as my talent in drawing (0/20 in fact XD) if you want a better view of Danny aka Jed Olsen, check out @arkkosun ‘s page who allowed me to use his/her version of our Danny boy! i thank him/her again by the way! So as promised @arkkosun @sleepydaydreamz and @horror-ink here’s my first chapter! And i hope not the last 0.0″)

#dbd #dbd fanfic #dead by daylight #ghostface #danny johnson #jed olsen

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bellalikeskitties · 5 years ago

Text

tattoos and tea ☾

pairing: nakamoto yuta x reader

you work at a flower shop and a tattoo artist from across the street comes in to practice drawing flowers for his next tattoo

word count: 1.9k+

genre: fluff,fluff,fluff tattoo shop au, flower shop au

It started as something simple. A customer emailed, asking for an elaborate tattoo. The whole shop was in shambles because the request was something they weren't quite used to. They tattooed blood, curse words, and even dicks. They were surprised when they were asked for a tattoo of flowers. Everyone was ready to refuse the customer, but Yuta was always one for a challenge.

"Yah! Don't worry! I'll take this!". He was confident, his skills as an artist never let him down. All his customers and co-workers said his work was fantastic and he was ready for this one to say the same.

Unfortunately, this task wasn't an easy feat. He scoured the internet for a usable reference, but for some reason, none of them resonated with what he wanted. That's when he approached you. You owned the flower shop and cafe just in front of theirs. He didn't know you personally but you did give them a bouquet as a present for their grand opening.

He fixed his hair again before he pushed the doors to your shop. A bell chimed and your head rose out from the corner. "Welcome! Are you here for the flowers or some tea?". You beam at him and he stops momentarily. He wasn't used to smiles and sweet greetings.

"Uhm, hey. I'm from, uh-". You move closer and notice his fidgeting. "I remember you! You're from up front, aren't you? Go take a seat, I'll get you something". He nods and waits until you retreat to the back before letting out a breath.

He knew you were a kind person. He sometimes sees you handing out roses to the old couples or small daisies to the kids who walked by after class. He just didn't expect you to be out-going as well. Yuta set his sketchbook and utensils on a table before slipping into the lush seats.

His eyes wandered over the shop. It looked like his grandmother's house, but more sweet-smelling and flowery. Flowers lined on one side of the shop and the other was filled with jars of dried tea. His gaze lingered on the flowers. Watching how the light hit them, the curve of their petals, and the assortment of colors.

"I guess you're here for the flowers then?". He falls out of his daze, not even realizing that he had started sketching one flower he couldn't name. "I didn't get your name earlier?". He coughed and set his pen down "It's Yuta". You smile and place a small cup on his table. "It's chamomile tea. I figured it would help your nerves. I'm (y/n) by the way". He gazes at the drink and takes a sip, "Even the cups are pretty, huh?". You tilt your head and giggle. "Thank you, Yuta".

He takes another sip before speaking. "I'm actually here for a favor. Would it bother you if dropped by from time to time? My customer asked for a tattoo of flowers and we don't really deal with stuff like that and-". "Sure! You can come to hang out". "What?".

Your eyes glance at his drawing. "Sure! I'm fine with it. Just as long as you taste test some of my new tea!". Your smile blinds him and at that moment, he thought you were a literal angel. "Deal". He extends his hand and you reach to shake it. Before he could even continue, his phone buzzed. "Looks like I need to go, thank you so much (y/n)". He gathers his things before heading to the door. "Your tea was delicious by the way!". You wave and watch him cross the street to his shop.

The next day, he's back. This time he isn't stuttering. He's ready and you are too. "Here, it's white tea". You press the tray to your chest and he takes a sip. "I'm not sure about adding it to our menu since it looks too bland".

Yuta sighs at the warmth. "It's filling, it would be nice to drink with something though". You take a seat in front of him and lean closer. "Like cake or cookies?". He purses his lips and thinks for a moment. "I think a cake would be better". You hum and mentally note his comment.

"Anyways, what's this called?". He picks up a bundle of violet flowers. You prepared a handful of flowers for him to examine while you had prepared his tea. Remembering how his eyes sparkled when you said they were for him. "Those are Sweet Peas, take a sniff". He looks at you questioningly before taking a whiff. "Woah! Sweet indeed!". He quickly writes on his sketchbook before reaching for another flower.

It was a fun activity for both of you. Asking each other questions on end. For you, it helped you add more things to serve and to share your knowledge. For Yuta, it helped him broaden his artistic skills and hopefully help your pretty shop.

"I'm so nervous. They're coming in tomorrow y'know". It had been a week or so since you started your everyday fun. He was comfortable with the ins and outs of your shop now. Sometimes even helping you take orders or serve. A few of the ladies now come to your shop just to watch Yuta.

"I know, you told me yesterday". You struggle to reach for a mug on the shelf and he moves behind you. "Need this?". He holds the said mug out and you flush. Even you couldn't help but follow him when he attended to your customers. He looked fitting next to the flowers, his smile refreshing and pleasant. He was really a beautiful man. No one would believe you if you said he worked as a tattoo artist, his looks would make you think he was a model or celebrity.

You thank him and continue to make another cup of tea. Yuta just watches. The last time he tried to help you, he burnt the tea. He chuckles as he recalls your panicked expression when he called for help. Your pouting face engraved in his head. To him, your daily hangouts were precious. He'd never met anyone like you. You and your love for flowers and fragrant teas.

"So, what are you planning to give them?". You hand him the now tea-filled mug to serve. His face scrunches and he sheepishly laughs. "I'm not sure. I guess I'll just do it on the spot". You gasp and almost spill hot water on yourself. "What do you mean 'I'll just do it on the spot'?!". He smiles at one of your customers before looking at you. "I mean, I'll just know when I see them". Your hands find your temples and you rub them in frustration and panic.

He laughs at your irritation. "Aw, c'mon (y/n). I'm not a bad artist at all! Don't worry! I'll even show you a photo of the finished product!". He ruffles your hair as you sigh. "How? You don't need to come here anymore after tomorrow". You mumble. His hand rests on your head. He realized that too. He doesn't have a reason to come over. After tomorrow, he didn't need to have flower lessons anymore.

He huffed. "What do you mean? Aren't we friends now (y/n)? I'll come over and hang out again. I promise!". A smile graces both your lips and you shuffle back to work. Yuta was determined not to let you go that easily. After tomorrow, he'll ask you out for sure. The bell chimes and he smiles, "Welcome!".

Finally, the day arrived. Yuta sat in his booth, glancing at his wall. It was filled with the sketches he made at your shop. Each flower was to his liking. You taught him so much, that he could probably be able to open a shop for himself. He scans over them again before checking his watch. "They should be here by now?". At that his buzzer rings and he jogs to the receiving area.

He wondered what his client looked like. He expected maybe a young teen wanting something simple for their first time or a middle-aged man wanting something to talk about to women. What he didn't expect was your smiling face as your were talking to Taeil. You were wearing a yellow summer dress and your hair was up, revealing the nape of your neck. You looked so perfect to Yuta. But it didn't explain why you were there.

"(y/n). What are you doing here? The tattoo isn't even done yet?". You scratch your head and glance at the man on the counter. "Oh? You know her? That's perfect then. She's the flower, Yuta". Yuta's eyes widen at the code name. You were his client? You, Miss "I-won't-even-hurt-an-ant", were getting a tattoo? "Oh, uh. Sure, follow me". You smile at Taeil before following Yuta to a more secluded room.

"Are you mad? I was going to tell you, but I didn't really know how to tell you". You walk next to him and peek at his face. He sighs. "I'm not mad. Just surprised, I guess. I never thought you would ask for it. It's my fault for not checking the name anyways". You enter his booth and gasp. Staring at the sketched on the wall while Yuta prepared a few more things.

"So you saw me, and you met me, and you even worked with me. What are you going to do?". He gazes at you and the wall, contemplating. Just imagining you inked with his work made his heart swell. He wanted to mark you with all the flowers he'd seen, but he knows just what do to.

"You'll see. Sit here". He tapped the leather chair and you obliged. "Will it hurt?". He laughed and you whined. He moved around before settling himself on your wrist. "You ready?". He starts the initial sketch, eyes focused on your skin. His needle hits something and you wince. He lifts his hand momentarily. "So, why'd you decide to get a tattoo?". He starts a conversation, hoping to take your mind off what he was doing to you.

"I have a friend, you might know him actually. He's Thai and he got a tattoo here once. He showed his tattoo to me and I thought it looked pretty". His lips curl into a smirk. "Thai? You're friends with Ten? Didn't expect that. I do all his tatts’". You snicker. "Oooh, that's cool. I really liked the thing on his chest by the way".

The pain suddenly stops and you turn to him. "How'd you even-? Are you dating him?". His eyes show anxiety and you realize what you said. "What? No! Ten just likes wearing flashy clothes. I just happened to see it". He sighs and continues to work on your wrist. "Wait, is this why you were panicking yesterday?". You groan and this time he laughs.

You continue chatting. You were amused at how Yuta had a steady hand, even as he laughed at your first meeting, but in your view. "I only gave you the pretty flowers to give you inspiration, I swear!". He chuckles and finally lifts his instrument. He gives your skin a few wipes before asking you if you wanted to take a look before he added the ointment.

"Woah! It's pretty". On your wrist was a red chrysanthemum in its prime. It looked like it belonged in your hand, the red petals complimenting your skin. You trace the lines in amusement. It actually looked like it was glowing.

Yuta watched you stare at your wrist. He felt like he was in heaven. You looked so pretty right there and then. "But doesn't this mean?". You feel Yuta's gaze on you and flush. "Yeah, you taught me yourself. So, uh, do you maybe want to get dinner after this?". He held your hand and you trembled a bit.

"Sure I would love to".

another yuta one 😔😔 and a flower shop and tattoo shop au!

btw red chrysanthemums mean love or i love you 🤭

#nct 127 #nakamoto yuta #yuta nakamoto scenarios #yuta nakamoto #yuta #nct imagine #yuta imagines #yuta scenario #nct yuta #nct fic #nct au #nct #yuta au #yuta fic #nct 127 yuta #nct tattoo artist au #bellalikeskitties

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nahimjustfeelingit-writes · 5 years ago

Text

Imagine:

Erik cuddling with Reader while she is on her period/having sex with Reader while she is on her period.

Warnings: FLUFF, SMUT, mentions of blood, cuddling, College Boy Erik.

Y/N woke up from an hour nap with her books at the foot of her bed. She was in the middle of studying for her Bio Chemistry class that she had to take as a prerequisite for Dental Hygiene. The pain is what woke her up after tossing and turning. Sharp, painful cramps sprang to life out of nowhere causing her to wince in pain while reaching down to rub her lower belly. Y/N pauses, picking up her phone to check her period app.

“Seriously? I thought this devil was coming tomorrow. Screw probation.”

Y/N called it probation because she couldn’t get any dick that she would surely crave since her menstrual days are her horniest days. Y/N groans, lifting out of her bed carefully in the loose fitted grey sweatpants that her boyfriend, Erik, left when he spent the night a few nights ago. That wasn’t the only thing he left. His durags, t-shirts, sneakers, and some hoodies were in her room as well. Y/N stood up with her shoulders slouched forward and her body feeling weak. Sure enough, as she pulled the waistband to Erik’s sweats, fresh crimson blood stained the crotch area of the pants heavily. Y/N then turned to the bed to see a stain in her white sheets. She was used to this. She wore underwear and certain clothes for things like this but this time around she wasn’t prepared. Frustration flowed through her veins as she walked with her knees buckled to the bathroom for another shower.

Y/N reaches under the sink to grab the peroxide so she could soak and scrub the blood from Erik’s sweats. Stripping naked, she felt the fresh blood trickle down her inner thighs since she always had a heavy flow during her menstrual cycle. Rushing so she wouldn’t stain the new white faux fur rug that she purchased for her bathroom, Y/N steps into the shower the blood only splattering on the edge of the tub. She made the water run hot while she lazily stood under it, staring at the wall and hugging her lower belly. All she wanted right now was a rub of Haagen Dasz coffee ice cream, some herbal tea, her favorite long u-shaped plush pillow that Erik purchased for her and watch crap TV. Another thing Y/N craved was her man’s big, strong arms wrapped around her while he rests his chin on her shoulder. Erik’s rubs to her belly always soothes the ache she felt. Then he gave Y/N soft kisses to her cheek and forehead. She was going to text him when she gets out of the shower.

———————

Pain on 1000, Y/N twists painfully from side to side in her freshly made bed. Erik didn’t reply to her cry for help. Where was her big strong boyfriend when she needed him? Then, it dawned on her. He had an evening course for school since he was going back to become an MRI Technologist. His evening hours where from 6PM to 9PM. It was currently 8:45PM. In the fetal position, Y/N whimpers, tears forcing out of the corners of her eyes like a pipe ready to burst because of how hard she squeezed her eyes. All the medicine in the world couldn’t stop her from being in pain.

As if Erik could hear her cries, Y/N’s phone vibrated with an incoming call. She reached out for her phone from its wireless charger on her bed, hitting the green button to accept his call.

“Baby, baby, where are you?” She spoke before he could even say what’s up or what’s wrong.

“I’m driving, class got out early. Everything okay, love?” Erik asks with concern.

“I need you,” She spoke softly with a whimper, “Can you come be with me?”

“I was going to do that anyway,” Erik chuckles, “I haven’t seen you since a few nights ago I need my baby girl.”

“Good, because my period decided to creep up on me and I’m having cramps right now. I need you to cuddle me and rub my belly.”

“Aww, Damn, no loving for me then, huh?”

“Sorry, Erik,” Y/N’s body tenses up from another affliction that made her tear up more.

“It’s okay. Did you need me to bring anything before I come over?”

“Just some ice cream. The coffee kind.”

“Bet, my sweats still over there, right?”

Y/N knew that he would ask about that. She had them in her washer right now. The blood successfully came out but it took a lot of effort.

“Um...about that-“

“You stained them?”

Y/N felt embarrassed. She didn’t want Erik to think that was disgusting.

“I’m so sorry, I’ll buy you another pair-“

“Girl, chill out. I don’t care about all that I just wanted to know if I needed to make a stop at my place before I came to you. Don’t trip, I don’t give a fuck about that shit.”

Y/N giggles while rolling over into her back, “some guys do-“

“Well, I ain’t some guys, I’m Erik, and I don’t think it’s gross.”

Y/N blushes while biting her lip, “Thank you,” she spoke timidly.

“Always, baby, listen, I just pulled up to 7-eleven I’ll let you know when I’m close, okay?”

“Okay, love you,” Y/N smiles.

“Love you too.”

She adored him.

—————————

Erik Stevens had a key to his girls apartment. He opened the door, stepping inside of her darkened living room. The chain lock secured, Erik takes off his sneakers by the door, heading into the kitchen to grab a spoon for her ice cream. Erik walked down the narrow hallway leading to her bedroom, finding Y/N on the bed laying on her right side staring at the TV. She was currently watching Family Fued. She had on a long plaid buttoned shirt that Erik remembers her purchasing from Good Will since she loved thrifting. Her big brown eyes went from sad to happy in a millisecond when she saw her man. She hopes up onto her knees, arms out like she was a toddler asking to be picked up. Erik smirked, walking over to his girl, bringing his arms around her waist and picking her up from the bed so she could straddle him. Her lips found his, kissing him gently at first before the taste of his tongue took over her senses, her kisses more forceful. Erik’s hands ran over her ass, palming it and squeezing it. She made sounds of pleasure in his mouth, her eyes closed.

“How is my baby feeling?” Erik looked up at her, “You look like you need all my love right now.”

“I do,” Y/N played with one of the strings of Erik’s hoodie, “I need my big, strong man.”

“Aww, my baby is so needy right now,” Erik kisses her forehead, “Come on, let’s get you on the bed.”

Erik lays Y/N down delicately before walking away towards her closet. He removes his khaki colored hoodie, revealing a loose fitted white tee underneath since he has so much muscle mass. He had on another pair of sweats too, the same design except they were black. His kinky fro was covered in a beanie but he snatches that off, using the tips of his fingers to pull out his curls. Y/N always found watching Erik undress to some degree satisfying. Erik comes back to the bed, bringing the 7-eleven bag with him and the spoon. He grabs the ice cream, removing the seal, and sank the fork directly in the middle for her to have at it. Y/N sits up, Erik wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling her over in one motion so she would lean against him while his arms rubbed her belly. She went limp against him, making sounds of pleasure and relief to finally have her ice cream and her man.

“Are you going to spend the night with me?” Y/N asks in a sweet voice, “I don’t think I would be able to sleep if you weren’t here.”

“Yeah, baby,” Erik looked from her tongue licking the ice cream from the spoon to her angelic brown eyes, “I’ll keep you nice and warm.”

Y/N giggles, scooping some more ice cream, “You treat me like a princess.”

“It’s because you are.”

Y/N wasn’t helping situations. She smelled like coconut oil, touching her belly made him want to rip the buttons on her plaid shirt so he could see her naked body, the way her curly hair tickles his chin and neck from the pineappled fro she had made his body shiver, and loved to bat those pretty brown eyes at him which got her whatever she wanted. He was horny for her. No sex since a few nights ago. That’s always how it was. Erik craved Y/N every second of every day. Now, his dick was hard and tenting the front of his black sweats. This night was about her and making her feel better but every little thing she did made him horny.

“What do you wanna watch,” Y/N looked over into his eyes, “We can watch Blade.”

“Sure,” Erik was always down to watch that it was a favorite of his, “I really just want to feel your ass on my dick while we cuddle.”

“Baby...stop it,” Y/N rolls her eyes. She was already horny just from him rubbing her belly, “You can’t talk like that when I’m on my period.”

“I can’t help that I’m hard right now and that I need some.”

“You are not helping,” Y/N places the ice cream on her side table in her room, “okay, let’s cuddle.”

Erik helps Y/N down on the bed, pulling the comforter over them both before pulling her close with his big arm. The second Y/N’s ass hit his dick, Erik’s nose went into her curls and his jaw tightened. His hand ran up and down her belly, eyes watching her lashes move up and down from her blinking while she puts on the movie. Erik pushes his dick further between her cheeks, eliciting a tiny moan from Y/N.

“Babyyy,” She complains, “Stop.”

Erik kisses his teeth, “Didn’t you tell me that masturbating and sex helps with cramps?”

“I did,” Y/N looks over her shoulder and back at Erik, “what are you suggesting?”

“I want to have sex so I can make you feel better.”

“Baby...that’s gross,” Y/N chuckles, “Plus, I’m not in the mood I just want to cuddle and be near you.”

“You are in the mood,” Erik reaches up to pinch one of her nipples, “That’s reason number one. Reason number two I can’t figure out since you don’t want me down there.”

“I’m wet regardless because I’m bleeding out,” Y/N cold feel it leaking as she spoke, “It’s messy and too much-“

“I don’t care. It’s a natural thing, Y/N. Period blood doesn’t bother me, girl.”

Y/N didn’t respond, she just turned her head back to watch TV. Even if she did say yes how would that feel? She thought about sex during her probation before but then that all ended because she assumed every guy wouldn’t be in to that. Here comes Erik Stevens, a guy who doesn’t give a fuck and who thinks pussy is pussy no matter what.

“Have you done this before, with another girl?” Y/N was curious.

“Nah. This would be my first time if you let me do it.”

Erik turns Y/N around to face him, using his fingers to stroke some hair from her eyes. Y/N knew that staring into those eyes would make her second guess the disgust she felt about having sex on her cycle. His fingers lightly stroked her lower belly directly over the area that hurt.

“The pain is right there,” Y/N spoke with a crease in her brows.

“Right here?” Erik rubs while looking her in her eyes.

“Uh-huh,” She bites her lip, “That feels good.”

“I can make you feel better though,” Erik pulls the waist band of her floral cotton panties, “Can I see?”

“Why?” Y/N felt her heart race.

“I just wanna see what makes you feel so icky. I wanna see why you’re shying away from me having sex with you.”

“Erik...it’s just not sexy,” She laughs nervously, “I’m bleeding-“

“I don’t care.” Erik reassures her.

“You are serious?” She couldn’t believe it for a second.

“YEAH,” He spoke with annoyance.

“I’m sorry it’s just-I just-I’m shocked I guess.”

Erik gave Y/N a soft smile, “I told you, I’m a different breed of man, Y/N. Consider yourself lucky.”

“Trust me, I do. Everyday.”

Erik leans forward to kiss her before trailing those soft kisses down her neck. He left a wet trail behind each time. Y/N’s body arched and she couldn’t tell the difference between wet pussy versus the blood. What she did feel between her legs however was a throb for attention. Her pussy felt neglected in all of this.

“So, what’s up then? Can you show me?”

Y/N looks away from Erik shyly, “Okay.”

Y/N watches as Erik pulls the comforter back from her legs, her panties revealed. His large hand cupped her pussy, rubbing it up and down. That felt amazing too. Y/N always felt a little sore down there during her cycle. Her legs opened further, her hands shaking from how nervous she was.

“Erik, maybe we shouldn’t-“

“STOP.” He ordered her.

“But, baby,” Y/N gasps when she felt Erik’s finger rub between her pussy lips over her panties.

“Shhh, cut it out,” Erik thumbed her clit, “Stop, tripping, okay?”

“Okay.”

Erik takes his fingers, pulling her panties down and over her knees. She has a tampon on right now. Her panties weren’t stained. Erik folds them and places them on the bed next to him.

“You okay?” He whispered to her.

“Yeah,” She could feel him using the tips of his fingers to spread her, “Baby, Wait, Wait...I have a tampon on,” She was overly bashful, “Why do you want to do this so much? I don’t feel confident.”

“You shouldn’t feel like that. I love you. All of you. I don’t care about blood, ma. It’s the same pussy I fuck when it’s not bleeding. Relax, baby. I got you, okay? Now, let me see.”

“Can I at least remove my tampon first?” Y/N sat up, thighs clenched so blood wouldn’t mess up the bed.

“Go ahead,” Erik helps her from the bed, “I’ll grab a few towels.”

He was dead fucking serious.

Y/N went to her bathroom, closing the door halfway and sitting on her toilet. She removes her tampon, wrapping it, and then throwing it in her trash can. Y/N nibbled on her bottom lip nervously. She wanted to try it and see if she liked it but on the other hand she didn’t want to make a mess and appear disgusting. Even though Erik said he did didn’t care there was still a small part of her that thought he did.

“Baby?” Erik’s voice could be heard calling out to her. He smooth, husky voice, “Do you need my help?”

“No, I’m coming,” Y/N wipes herself before flushing the toilet and washing her hands. Quickly, she made it back to the bedroom, Erik laying out black towels with the sheets pulled from the bed. He was in nothing but his black sweats, shirt off and tempting. She gets onto the bed, laying back on the towels with her thighs tightly shut.

“Are you gonna be difficult?” Erik questions with a raised brow, “Because I told you, I don’t give a fuck. Ain’t gonna stop me.”

“I’ll try not to be,” She spoke truthfully.

“Try really hard for me, okay?” Erik got onto his knees in the bed between her legs, “Now, spread your legs for me.”

With a shake of her thighs, Y/N opens them, her beautiful pussy spread open for Erik to see. She couldn’t look at him while he stared at her pussy. Y/N turned away, eyes closed. His silence is what made her close her thighs.

“Did I tell you to close your thighs?”

“No,” Y/N opened them again, “You just didn’t say anything-“

“It’s because I was admiring that pussy, ma. Stop reading into everything.”

“Ugh, okay,” She opens her thighs again, “Just...day something, anything.”

“It’s beautiful, even with the blood, it’s still beautiful.”

Y/N glances at Erik, “Really?”

“Of course, I wouldn’t lie to you, wouldn’t do you like that,” Erik takes his fingers to spread her more, “Fuck,”

“Huh?” She got up on her elbows, “Is something wrong?”

“No,” Erik didn’t remove his eyes from between her legs, “How could a nigga find this nasty? It ain’t nasty, it’s precious.”

“Erik,” Y/N couldn’t believe that’s how he felt.

“I’m so fucking horny right now,” Erik leans over Y/N while his fingers rubbed her clit, “Damn, baby, you’re so damn pretty down there.”

“Erik,” She couldn’t say much but his name. His free hand unbuttoned her shirt, her breasts with extra hard nipples ready to be sucked on.

“Keep saying my name like that. It’s only gon’ make my dick harder,” Lips sucked on her nipples, “You gon’ let Daddy fuck that pretty pussy to make you feel better?”

“Yes,” Her nipples were electrified from his licking and sucking.

“I just want my baby girl to feel better,” Erik picked up the speed of his fingers on Y/N’s clit.

“Mmm, fuck,” Y/N could feel her hips moving in tandem with his motions, “Erik-“

“What?”

“Fuck, Erik, that feels so good.”

“Your so messy on my fingers,” His teeth lightly grazed her left nipple, “Cum on my fingers, girl.”

“Please,” She begged him to keep going. Y/N was past the point of caring about her bleeding when Erik deliciously rubbed her hardened clit the way he did.

“Say my name again,” Erik ran his tongue up Y/N’s neck.

“Erik”

“Good girl. That pussy cumming ain’t it?”

“Uh-huh,”Y/N gasps and pants heavily, “Yes, I’m gonna cum, baby.” She bites down on her bottom lip as her release rocked through her. Her thighs closed around Erik’s hand. She could feel herself creaming on the towels.

“Damn,” Erik looks at his fingers covered in her wetness mixed with blood, “Fuck, baby, fuck.”

“Y/N reaches out to feel on Erik’s dick, “Umph, baby, it’s so fucking hard.”

“I know, that’s why I need you. You ain’t even gotta suck it,” Erik whips his fingers on the towel before getting off the bed to take of his sweats. He pulls out his wallet, grabbing one gold wrapped condom before crawling back onto the bed. Y/N watched Erik’s dick bounce up and down as it stood straight from how solid it is. He was fully erect, 100% rigid. All of that because of how much he needed to be inside of Y/N no matter how much she bled. Erik pulls Y/N’s thighs up and over his shoulders to decrease the amount of mess. With his dick in his grip, Erik slips inside, no resistance, just sliding right in because of how messy she is. It was so slippery from the blood and her natural lubricant. The sensation sent tingles from the tip of his dick all the way down to his heavy sack filled with cum. Erik looked down between her legs to see his condom covered dick crimson. He couldn’t stop himself from fucking her fast. That’s how good it felt.

Y/N could feel all of Erik inside her aching pussy. The slippery sex felt so damn good that Y/N couldn’t muster a word or a sound. She wanted to kick herself for not trying this before. She felt the exact same pleasure from when she wasn’t on her period but sloppier and wetter. The noises her pussy made turned her on so much. It was like music.

“Fuck, you feel so damn good, girl,” Erik mumbled in her ear, “oooooo I don’t wanna get out of this pussy.”

Y/N drags her nails down Erik’s back, “You don’t have to stop, Daddy, remember, you’re supposed to make me f-feel better,” Y/N’s eyes rolled shut.

“That pussy feeling better already,” He swiveled his hips deeper, “Mmm, girl, I wanna feel you cum on Daddy’s dick while I beat it up.”

“Yes, yes, Daddy, yes,” Y/N felt the pressure from his dick dragging over her G-spot and pulling on her clit, “Shit-shit, Daddy, that dick is on my G-spot, Umph, ima squirt-“

Y/N felt the rush of liquid fall to the towels and on Erik’s dick. Her hips moved up and down with his strokes because she needed to feel him inside of her.

“Keep still, let Daddy fuck you,” Erik held her hips in place, “Ain’t so disgusted now are you? The way you fucking me back let’s me know you don’t care about that silly shit. Who in this pussy?”

“Daddy-“

“Daddy a man, baby, Daddy ain’t no little boy. Daddy don’t give a fuck about some blood,” Erik felt her walls hug him, “mmmm, such a greedy little pussy.”

“YES!” Y/N gave herself to him. She couldn’t keep up with his strokes to her walls.

“Damn, you about to make Daddy bust a nut already?” Erik slows down, “This what you do to me, girl, you always get me like this. It don’t matter what you do, you always get Daddy’s dick hard.”

“Fuck, baby, you’re so big,” Y/N could feel her warm wet pussy leaking, “you feel so good inside of me.”

Y/N tightened her walls around Erik’s dick, pulling him further inside until his hips let hers. His groomed pubic hair was warm and wet from her blood mixed with her wetness. The more he tried to pull his dick out all the way to the tip, the more she pulled him back with her greedy pussy.

“You don’t want me to go huh? You like me in this pussy? You don’t care about making a bloody fucking mess on me? Answer me.”

“Fuck! No!” Y/N shook her head from side to side, “No, Daddy, I just want you to keep fucking me!”

Erik’s sweaty face rested on Y/N’s cheek while his fingers squeezed the fat of her thighs to keep her still and for leverage so he could pound her pussy. Slippery and messy, Y/N squeezed her eyes shut, an arm wrapping around Erik’s neck to hold on while he aggressively pounds her pussy.

“Daddy! Slow down! It’s gonna get everywhere!”

Erik completely ignored her.

“Fuck!!!!! Oh my God, oh, oh, shit, baby, fuck!!!” Y/N opened her mouth and her voice went mute. She beat the on Erik’s back weakly with her fist with her powerful release trying unsuccessfully to get him to slow down since she was overworked and sensitive.

“Baby, fuck, this precious little pussy on you got me cumming, “Y/N’s thighs almost choked him, “Stay fucking still.” He spoke through clenched teeth with a barely audible voice. Y/N stomached the deep penetration she felt and the way her walls tingled while Erik’s dick grew to a cum inspiring length. Filled and stretched, Erik grunts in Y/N’s ear as his cum shot into the condom, filling it up and damn sure almost breaking it with how much he exploded. It was like opening a cap on a shaken soda bottle.

“GODDAMN.” He was swimming in her tight pussy, “GODDAMN GIRL.”

Y/N looked towards the ceiling with disbelief.

“OH MY GOD,” Erik pulled his still hard dick out hesitantly. He still wanted to stay inside of her but his girl was whimpering. The condom was so tight around him from his cum stuffed inside. Erik could see Y/N’s cream coating her clit and labia and all of her menstrual blood mixed with her lubricant making her pretty pink pussy shine and glisten. Her outer lips were puffed and engorged from the beating Erik gave her. Watching her pussy convulse and jump, releasing more cream made Erik want to put on another condom, turn her over, and fuck that pussy some more.

“I actually feel better,” Y/N rubbed her sweaty belly, “I don’t feel the cramps anymore.”

“I told you, baby,” Erik leans forward to kiss her, “Now, you know how we can take care of that, right?”

“Yes,” She smiles weakly, “It was exactly what I needed.”

Erik leans over with a flex of his abs to see her fluids that stained his pubic area. The sight of it turned him on so much. Y/N sat up carefully, her thighs trembling. Even though her cramps were gone, her pussy still aches.

“I’ll run a bath,” Erik walked into the bathroom, flicking on the light and removing the condom. It was heavy with his cum. He grabbed some of Y/N’s natural soak with Aloe Vera, coconut oil, and lavender oil, placing it in her bath and spreading it around with his hand. He walks back to the room, spotting Y/N undressing.

“Come on, we’re taking a bath together.”

“How are you going to fit in my small ass tub. You know your much taller and bigger than me, Erik.”

Erik shrugs, “we’ll make it work. How do you feel though, you’re good?”

“I’m better. You just beat my pussy up, that’s all,” Y/N walks towards him with shaky knees, “Nothing I’m not used to from you, Daddy.”

Erik bites his lip at her, watching her walk past him before his hand reached out to lightly tap her but, “Mhm, that’s right. I’ll beat it up no matter what.”

#killmonger imagine #killmonger x reader #killmonger fanfiction #nahimjustfeelingit-writes #erik killmonger

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softbiker · 5 years ago

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Born to Run - Chapter 17

Warnings: angst, alcohol abuse, anxiety, heartbreak, police violence (potentially triggering encounter, please heed the warning), language

Word count: 3.2k

A/N: Well, here it is. All I can do is say...I’m sorry. But I promise I’ll fix it. I decided to go ahead and post this tonight because I haven’t gotten to write much lately, I’ve been working constantly and now I’ve got a second job - so I just love getting to write and post when I can. Thank you for sticking with this story. It’s almost a year old now! As always, let me know what you think!!

“I dunno, Mom - I mean it’s not like I planned this-”

“Well, no, honey,” her mother huffed over the phone. “It doesn’t seem like you planned any of it.”

Y/N winced at the sting of her words but didn’t argue. With her phone wedged between her ear and her shoulder, she grabbed another stack of underwear and socks from the dresser and turned back towards her bed, where a suitcase lay open. A few pairs of jeans and a couple of sweaters were already folded inside. Off to one side, her toiletry bag was stuffed full - skincare and toothpaste and hair products she might not even use but tossed in anyway in her flustered packing frenzy. Her grip on the socks in her hands tightened to keep her fingers from trembling.

It had been 2 days since her fight - breakup - with Bucky. For the first 24 hours, she fell into an anxious, disorganized catatonia; she shuffled from room to room in her house, pacing and biting her nails, opening cabinets at random then promptly closing them. Her fingers tapped restlessly against her thigh, and her heart raced at a breakneck pace. If a single clear thought managed to arrange itself from the scattered clutter of her panic, it was only Bucky’s face, red-eyed and tear-stained as he pleaded with her. After splashing some water on her face and changing into sweatpants, she had put herself to bed, settling in for the longest night of her life. She tossed and turned, hearing the minutes tick by from the clock on the wall. At around 3 am, she threw off the covers in heartbroken frustration and stalked to the kitchen, setting the kettle on for tea and raiding her cabinets for any treats she could find. Thank God she still had that fancy dark chocolate she’d gotten last time she went to the city; it was the only thing her cupboards could provide in the way of comfort food. Armed with a steaming cup of lavender chamomile and an entire half-pound of dark chocolate she settled back under the covers and grabbed the T.V. Remote from her nightstand. If nothing else, she prayed Netflix could distract her, fill her mind with different faces, different voices - drown out the one that wouldn’t leave her.

She managed to doze off towards the end of Breakfast at Tiffany’s, tearful confessions playing in the background of her not-quite-dreams, and woke just before 7. A cold, clear morning greeted her through the window, the air in her room practically frigid, but something in it settled her. Quieted the static that had blurred out all thought since Bucky walked through her door the day before. With a deep breath, she threw off the covers and swung her feet out of bed, leaving the tea cup and chocolate wrapper to deal with later. It was her running shoes she reached for.

An hour and 10 kilometers later, she jogged back up her front porch steps, breathing heavy and feeling light. Her cheeks were charted from the wind, and her nose was running, but the grip on her heart had shaken loose. And as she clambered into the shower, stinging hot and billowing steam, new thoughts began to string together - thoughts for tomorrow, and the tomorrow after that.

Still in sweatpants, hair dripping, she’d scribbled down a list while she sipped her coffee. Names, to-do’s, a seed of a plan. In order, she phoned the clinic, her best friend, her residency program coordinator - and now, at last, her mom.

“I’m driving up to stay with Kat for a few days - maybe a week,” Y/N sighed, ignoring her mom’s comment. “Just to…clear my head, you know?”

“Sure, sure,” her mom agreed. “Though I don’t know why you couldn’t come here…I haven’t seen you since Thanksgiving-”

“Mom.” She closed her eyes, one hand settled on her hip. “It’s not a vacation.”

“No, sweetie, but it doesn’t hurt to come let your mom take care of you…”

Knuckles pressed to her eyelids, Y/N sat down on the edge of her bed. The old mattress creaked, as it had every night she slept in it for the last several months.

“I-I just,” she licked her dry lips and tried to swallow. “I need to be alone for a little bit, Mom. Once I’ve got it all figured out, I’ll let you know. And maybe…who knows, maybe I can come visit soon.”

“Sweetheart.” The voice on the phone is tired, resigned. “Why do you always try to do these things by yourself? You don’t have to be alone.”

Y/N’s throat tightened, her fingers curling into the fabric of her pants. She breathed slowly, warding back the lump that threatened to close off her voice.

“I’m sorry, Mom. But this time I do.”

**********

“You’ve got to go in there and wake him up-”

“I’m not doing it - I wouldn’t touch him with a 10 foot pole when he’s like this.”

“Well, someone’s got to. We’re bugging out in just a couple days-”

Heavy-eyed, and feeling like death warmed over, Bucky stirred at the sound of the voices outside his bedroom. Harsh winter sunlight burst through the blinds over his window; even before he opened his eyes it hurt. Something throbbed inside his skull, and his tongue felt thick and heavy in his parched mouth. Why the hell did he feel this bad? He couldn’t remember the last time he drank like this, to the point of blacked out nausea. His stomach roiled as he turned over, and he felt far too old to be drinking like there was no tomorrow, like he hated himself-

And then he remembered.

Y/N.

Suddenly he had no interest in getting up, getting water, getting something that would settle his stomach. He covered his face with his hands, fingers pressing firm against his eyelids and blocking out any light that came through. It was hot in his room, the combination of heating and a pile of blankets that someone had tucked him in with, but he didn’t move the covers, choosing instead to sweat underneath them.

How had he fucked up so badly? The best thing that ever happened to him - and now she was gone, baby, gone. It would’ve been alright, maybe, if Natasha had allowed him to talk to Y/N himself, but-

Natasha. Just the thought of her set his blood on fire, and he sat bolt upright in bed, his eyes flying open - only to immediately regret it as a stronger wave of nausea threatened to claim him. He quickly folded himself in half and put his head between his knees. When his head finally stopped spinning, he propped his elbows up against his knees and threaded his hands through his hair.

Already, he felt a thread of shame and guilt tugging at his gut. It wasn’t right to blame Natasha. He knew that. The lies were all his own; all Nat had done was reveal the truth.

But, God, the look on Y/N’s face - she had never looked at him that way, not even in the beginning when she was afraid he might be a criminal. It chilled him - right down to the marrow of his bones - the cold anger, the mask of disgust and disinterest that she wore to hide the way she hurt. And she did - he could see her pain cracking the ice in her eyes, no matter how she tried to hide it.

He hated himself for it.

A soft knock at the door, and Steve’s blond head poked in.

“Oh,” he said, eyebrows jumping in surprise. “You’re awake.”

Bucky’s scowl deepened as Steve and Sam kindly let themselves into his room and took up post at the foot of his bed.

“Yeah - thanks to you two. You wouldn’t know how to whisper if your life depended on it, Wilson.”

To his credit, Sam didn’t respond - merely rolled his eyes and cast an exasperated glance at Steve. With a sigh, Steve crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes down on the soft blue quilt Bucky had haphazardly wrinkled during the night.

“Look, I understand that you’re really upset right now.” Steve’s voice was soft, barely more than a murmur. “I know…I know how much she meant to you.”

Bucky felt his eyes starting to burn as he stared at his friends, and he hastily scrubbed at them with his palms, sniffing.

“But,” Steve continued, licking his lip. “We’ve got our marching orders - we’re on standby to pull out any day now. We - I - can’t have you going on binders, AWOL for 24 hours, and then stumbling in here piss drunk at 3 in the morning.”

“We thought you were dead, Barnes,” Sam added, clenching his jaw. “We’re on fuckin’ suicide watch, man. You’re gonna drink yourself to death over a breakup? Huh?”

Growling, Bucky reached behind himself for a pillow and hurled it at Sam’s head.

“Shut the fuck up-”

“No, Buck, Sam is right.” Steve’s brows were knitted together tightly. His eyes were sympathetic, but the rest of him was unflinching as stone. “You can’t do that again. What if you’d run yourself off the road, or gotten hit by a car?” Bucky scoffed, but Steve didn’t back down. Raising his voice he went on. “No, I really want you to think - would you be better off dead? Is that what you want? Is that what she would want?”

Eyes squeezed shut, Bucky saw her face right before him once again, her smiles, the way she used to look at him. The panic in her eyes during his parking lot showdown with Rumlow, the way she bit her lip when she was concentrating on something, how sleepy her eyes were in the mornings - each little piece of her, precious secrets he had tucked away in the hidden corners of his heart. He had thought, dreamed, that he had a lifetime to collect them all, fit all her parts together like a puzzle one piece at a time, and love every moment of it. Now, though. These lone pieces are all he has left, and they will never be enough.

What did she want? He knew only one thing for sure - that she was the only person who could say.

“I don’t think it matters to her either way, punk.”

**********

A few miles outside of town, just past the last lonely gas station, was the exit ramp to the interstate. The road had seen better years; the pavement was pitted with potholes and cracks, haphazardly patched with uneven lumps of asphalt that left drivers weaving between lanes and wondering which would do more damage to their tires. But, since this part of the state saw less traffic than other areas, infrastructure money was slow to trickle down towards repair and reconstruction.

Y/N had driven this road a handful of times - as she moved into town, and then when she had taken the drive a couple of times to visit her friends in the city. It was desolate enough to be a slightly depressing drive; nothing but scorched fields for miles on either side of the road, and the steep ditches that banked it on either side were overgrown with wispy stalks of dead grass. Overhead, a grey and overcast sky shadowed everything, promising a winter day best spent indoors.

She tuned in and out of a true crime podcast while she drove, hardly seeing the road in front of her. Her mind was too far gone on the events of the past few days - and everything she had to do with the coming ones. But there was something comforting here, in the grip of the wheel in her hands, a travel mug of coffee still steaming in the cupholder, an open road ahead of her. She felt…awake, present. Bruised, but not broken. And ready to get back up.

Of course, it shook her when a cop car pulled out of the overgrowth on the shoulder of the exit ramp, putting on speed to keep up with her. Mentally she reviewed her driving - still only 5 over the speed limit, her lights were on and working, her tags were in date. They had no reason to pull her over, she rationalized.

And they didn’t. The car stayed right behind her for the next 10 miles, quietly driving at her speed, keeping a couple car lengths’ distance between. No flashing lights, no sirens.

So why were her palms sweating?

After 20 miles, the sirens finally started blaring, blue and red flashes blinking in her rearview mirror. Despite being raised to respect the law, she felt nervous as she glanced back at the car, easing her foot off the accelerator, but not quite braking to pull over. She bit her lip, hesitating another few seconds as the alarm grew louder behind her. Her stomach clenched nervously.

Stop freaking out. You’re just worried about getting a ticket. Sucking in a deep breath through her nose, she scolded herself and gently pulled her car over to the side of the road, careful not to get too far into the muddy grass along the shoulder. Fingers fidgeting nervously on the steering wheel, she watched as the officer got out of his car and strolled up to her window at a leisurely pace. His head was shaved, and he wore dark mirrored sunglasses, in spite of the gloomy light of the day. As she rolled down her window, she squinted at his face, trying to recognize him from the adrenaline-blurred memories of the night Bucky killed Brock Rumlow - but the low slope of his cheekbones, the clean-shave, the firm-set frown are all unfamiliar to her.

“Good afternoon, ma’am,” he greeted her, one hand on his hip. It drew her eyes down towards his gun. “License and registration please.”

Instinctively, she nodded and reached towards her wallet lying in the passenger seat to dig out her license. The officer was silent, propping one hand against her car while he waited; she could hear her own heartbeat in her ears and willed herself to calm down.

Clearing her throat, she gathered her courage and spoke up.

“Excuse me, officer-” He barely glanced up from where he was perusing her car registration. “Why did you pull me over?”

He looked up at her fully at the question, shifting his stance and licking his upper lip.

“One of your tail lights is out,” he said, shoving her papers back through the window. “That’s a real safety issue.”

“My tail light…?” Her tail light - which had been changed only a month ago. She knew, because Bucky did it himself. He had always been worried about her safety; every time she was going somewhere without him, he did a full inspection of the car, testing brakes and changing the oil, going over every last inch of it and then filling up the tank with gas before she left. Last time, she’d sat in the garage nursing a cup of cider as she watched him fiddle with the lights…

She shook her head to lose the thoughts of him.

“I’m sorry, sir, but my tail lights are working just fine, I just had the bulbs changed.” She leaned forward in the seat, peering up at the officer. “Are you sure that there’s something wrong with them?”

Frown deepening even further, he crossed his arms and widened his stance.

“Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you to get out of the car?”

“Excuse me?”

“Get out of the car, ma’am.”

“What? Why?”

“Please, just calm down and get out of the vehicle.”

“But-” her protest broke off as he shifted his stance back, one hand inching towards the mace in his belt. She glanced at her phone, sitting in the unoccupied cupholder with her aux cable connected to it. Her fingers twitched - for a microsecond, she contemplated the very bad idea of reaching for it, refusing to get out of the car, calling-calling…someone. Someone.

But surely, if she cooperated, this would all be worked out with just a minor headache, or maybe a ticket, she reassured herself. She repeated it in her head as she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the door, climbing out of the car carefully, her hands held out to her sides where they could be seen.

Once she was out of her car, the officer took a step forward and pushed on her door, shutting it with a resounding click.

“Okay, I’m out of the car…”

“Turn around and put your hands on the hood.”

“I’m sorry, what?” she exclaimed, hearing her voice hitch in alarm. Her eyes cast up the road and back towards the exit ramps - there were no other cars in sight. No witnesses. “Am I under arrest?”

“Shut the fuck up,” he growled, out of patience. His hand went to rest on his gun now. “Turn around and put your fucking hands on the hood of the car.”

Her fists curled and she stood her ground. She willed away her thoughts of Bucky.

“No. I haven’t broken the law, you can’t arrest me for having a tail light out-”

In a blink, his gun was up and trained directly on her.

“Put your hands on the fucking car!” he yelled, loud enough to make her wince at the volume. Her thoughts tunneled on the barrel of the gun aimed at her chest.

Wordlessly, she turned and planted her hands on the cold metal, shivering in just her sweatshirt, her winter coat tossed in the passenger seat while she was driving. The tips of her fingers went numb and her eyes watered, stung by the wind. Her dry tongue pressed against the backs of her teeth - if she tried to swallow she’d choke.

“Who are you?” Her voice shook, but she managed the words. Scared and alone, but she’d fight, goddammit. She’d fight. He would want her to fight. “Who the hell are you and what do you want?”

“Shut up.” A firm, cold point of pressure between her shoulder blades as he pressed the gun against her back. There was a faint buzzing sound and then the rustle of fabric; when he spoke again, it clearly wasn’t to her. “Yes, sir?” He answered his phone. “Yes - we’re on schedule. I have the package. Will confirm when its secure and en route.”

Her heart raced wildly and her mind went white with fear. What was he talking about? This had to be some kind of mistake, a misunderstanding-

Just as she opened her mouth to speak again, the butt of his gun came down against the back of her head; her vision exploded in stars, and then faded to black as she slumped against her car. Barely conscious, she felt herself being dragged away down the road, lifted and shoved into the backseat of the squad car, unceremoniously dumped with her face down against the cold leather. The engine hummed to life; a seatbelt clicked - not hers.

“Sir?” He spoke again from the front seat. “Package is secured.”

She wondered if Bucky was coming to find her. He would, she told herself. He’d come.

And then, nothing.

#bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky x reader fic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #born to run #biker!bucky #biker!bucky au #biker!bucky fic

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anniesocsandgeneralstore · 4 years ago

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Your Power Over Me: One - Beginning

Summary: this movie was not that great.....it had so much potential. But I’m going through some sort of weird JGL phase and I really like his character in this. Another cop but at least he’s not a bastard. His character has zero backstory besides loving and living in nola so I’m giving him a FAMILY BITCH. This’ll prolly take place right before the events of the movie.

Pairing: Frank Shaver x OFC (Michelle Shaver)

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: mega fluffy so wooooo

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Frank pulled up to the house and parked the car on the side of the street. It was late. Later then he said he would be. He definitely missed bedtime by now. Again. Third time this week. At least this time he’d remembered to shoot her a text. He sighed, pulling his hands over his face. He was so tired. He killed the engine but continued to sit there for a moment.

What he saw tonight was indescribable. Unfathomable. That suspect…What he could do was beyond any normal human. Almost like he had….

Frank shook his head. No. If he thought about it too much it would make that next word a reality. Something that was plausible, tangible, something that wasn’t just on the movie screen or in the pages of a comic book.

He got out of the car.

The path that led up to the front porch was lined with purple flowers, freshly planted for the new, colder season. She had told him when she was working in the yard that day what they were. Something that started with an F — he couldn’t remember. His mind had probably been too distracted that day thinking about a case. He’d look it up later. The white paint of the porch was chipped, but the matching siding was pristine. Newly painted over after she finally convinced him that the periwinkle purple that the house was before was rather hideous. She wanted the front door untouched though, a bright turquoise blue.

The house was dark and quiet when he came in. He kicked off his boots at the door, adding them to the pile of tiny sparkly slip-ons, pink Crocs, and flip-flops with the little elastic strap on the back to keep them on tiny feet better. The living room was speckled here and there by toys. She had probably given up on forcing the issue of cleaning when they were just going to get pulled out the next day anyway. He smiled. He hoped they had a good day — he wished he could’ve asked her about it.

He stopped in Claudia’s room first. The bedroom had a pink haze, the little machine on her bedside table projecting hearts and unicorns on the ceiling to help her sleep. Claudia had moved into a big-girl bed just a few weeks ago. He thought she still looked so small in it. Wasn’t it just yesterday he could fit her entire body in one arm? Now she was old enough to sleep in a bed with no rails? The crib she had been using before was pushed into the corner of the room, waiting for the newest Shaver to arrive.

God, he hoped it was another girl. He didn’t know if they could afford to buy all new clothes for a boy.

Claudia was asleep in the center of the bed. Frank chuckled quietly to himself. Just like her mom. Pillow still at the head of the bed, curled in on her side with the blankets barely covering her legs. Her dark hair just like his in messy double french braids. He sat down quietly at the edge of the bed. He looked at her for a moment.

When she was born, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. She came into the world bright blue and not breathing. The first time he saw her he had been so scared. Scared for her life, scared of failing her. And for a long time after, even when the doctors got her breathing and free of the umbilical cord, he only looked at her with fear in his heart. A whole life — his responsibility. But now he only looked at her with love. A love so strong he was sure it would make the wind change directions. Everything he did, he did for her. His little Claudia.

Then he leaned down and pressed a kiss to her warm cheek. God, she got so sweaty at night.

“I love you, Cloudy,” he whispered, “Sweet dreams.”

He left her with one final kiss and the door cracked open how he knew she liked it. From the dark hallway, he could see that their bedroom light was on. He sighed. She shouldn’t have waited up for him. But he also knew that he was powerless to stop her.

Michelle was sitting up on her respectful side of the bed under the covers. Her bright, copper hair was thrown up into a bun at the top of her head. She held a book, about halfway finished, in her hands. An empty mug that once was filled with tea if Frank had to guess sat on her nightstand. She smiled at him when he gingerly opened the door, a soft, tired thing that made him feel even more exhausted than he did before.

“Hey, baby,” he sighed as he shut the door behind himself.

“Hi,” Michelle whispered back. She closed her book and set it down beside her empty mug.

Frank let out a long breath. He might have been in his house for nearing on five minutes, but he didn’t feel like he was home until he saw her. Then the more he looked at her, the more he thought about the things he saw that night; and the more he thought about that the more tired he became. He felt surprising tears prick the backs of his eyes. And she seemed to notice them, those unwanted tears that hadn’t even fallen yet, her face buckling in concern.

“Frankie?”

She moved to get up but he held up a hand. He groaned as he pulled at his nose, rubbed at his eyes. Trying to force the tears back and keep his head on his shoulders. He pulled off his badge and gun first, setting them on top of the dresser by the door. Then he stripped himself down to his underwear, leaving his clothes where they lay. He’d pick them up tomorrow. He slid in beside her on top of the covers, laying his head on her chest and placing a hand on her swollen belly. Michelle instantly wrapped him up in her arms, one hand running through his short hair.

“Rough night?” she asked quietly, giving the top of his head a quick kiss.

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Not yet.” He pulled her a little closer. “Just talk to me for a little while? At least until the baby cries.”

Michelle chuckled. “She’s not a baby anymore, Frankie.”

“She’ll always be my baby girl.” He moved down and pressed a kiss to her stomach. “At least until this one gets here.”

They had never discussed having a second kid. Both of them were perfectly content with the one — especially for financial reasons. But then Michelle’s period never came, she took a test, and sure enough, she was pregnant again. About five months along now. They were happy, Claudia was ecstatic to be a big sister. But they also had to live with the reality that Frank was an underpaid detective, Michelle worked part-time as a florist, and they lived in only 700 square feet of house. Things were going to be tight until Michelle could go back to work full time and Frank finally got that raise he had been promised. They had made it through worse. They could make it through this.

“I don’t know — I just have a feeling this one’s a boy.”

Frank looked up at her with a smirk. “A feeling? A feeling where?”

“In my…Motherly instinct.” She hit him gently when he laughed. “You cops follow your gut — we mom’s gotta follow our instinct. Millions of years of evolution was not for nothing.”

“Okay, fine.” He chuckled a few more times before he moved so his head was back on her chest. “How was your day?”

“It was good. Worked today. Donna says hi by the way. First arrangement of the day was an apology. The client specifically asked for Star of Bethlehem and Ivy. Donna and I are sure he cheated. Then I did an anniversary piece with Eucalyptus, Scabiosa — they’re a dark dark purple flower, I think you’d like them — Sweet Peas, Spirea — “

“The guy picked up the car and threw it at us,” Frank suddenly spoke, eyes lost somewhere between the present and the past.

He was sure that Michelle heard him, but she still asked, “What?”

“Suspect robbed a pawn shop — we had him cornered in an alley. Then he picked up an abandoned car and threw it at us.”

“Was anyone hurt?” she asked.

“No — well, just the suspect. Next minute he was rolling around on the ground screaming his head off. Medical said that nearly every muscle in his body had detached from the bone.” He felt her shudder beneath him.

“That sounds awful,” she whispered, “Must be some kind of new drug or?”

“Nobody knows,” he sighed, “Captain didn’t even wanna talk about it when we got back to the station. We’ve been getting…A lot of weird calls lately.”

Michelle adjusted herself so that she and Frank were laying side by side. Curled on her side and nose to nose with the man she loved. “Just stay safe…That’s all I ask.”

“You know I do, baby.” He reached out and cupped her cheek. “Anything to come back to you.”

“You’ve got a power over me, Franklin Shaver.” She smiled, her light brown eyes crinkling at the edges, and he could feel his heart lift in his chest. A weight lifting off of him. “You gonna hold it over me?”

This, right here, was warmth and light and home. As long as she was there waiting for him, with open arms and a smile, nothing could get him down. No case could be too dark, too dangerous, too bleak. She was his source of power, his energy, his everything. What more could he possibly need than his family?

“For the rest of our lives, baby.”

The door creaked open. Frank instantly shot up in bed, that gut feeling taking over him as he shielded Michelle with one arm. But then he saw little Claudia standing in the doorway. Messy braids hanging limp on her shoulders, favorite blanket cradled in her arms, and chubby cheeks red with sleep. Her eyes were barely cracked open as she walked into her parent’s bedroom.

“Cloudy, baby, what’s wrong?” Michelle asked as Frank visibly relaxed beside her.

The toddler walked further into the room, to Frank’s side of the bed. She shook her head. “Daddy.”

“You just want Daddy?”

Claudia nodded her head and Frank scooped her into his arms. God, she was sweaty. “All right, let’s go back to bed, okay?”

He moved to get up from the bed but Claudia began to fuss. Whining and kicking at him with her little feet. Frank held her legs down. “Nah-ah. Use your words.”

“Stay ‘ere with…Daddy.”

Frank looked over to Michelle. She had her head cocked to one side and a smile on her face. “I think someone missed you today.”

“I missed you too, baby-girl.” Frank kissed the top of her head and tucked her into bed between him and Michelle. “Let’s go to bed and you can snuggle me all night long.”

Frank got under the covers and Michelle turned off the light. Claudia burrowed herself into his chest, her favorite blanket tucked between them. Frank looked at Michelle one last time in the darkness. She had let her hair down for the night. Copper tresses hanging well past her shoulders and fanned out across her pillow.

He had been so tired before. So drained of all energy. But now, laying there with his little girl against his chest and the love of his life beside him, he could feel all that energy coming back. The power he needed to get up in the morning and face another day of crime, cruelty, and corruption in New Orleans.

#project power #project power fic #project power fanfic #project power fanfiction #frank shaver #frank shaver imagine #frank shaver x reader #frank shaver x you #frank shaver x oc #joseph gordon levitt #jgl

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letshaikyuu · 5 years ago

Text

ᑎO ᖴᒪOᗯEᖇᔕ ᗯEᖇE ᗷᒪOOᗰIᑎG (ᗩKᗩᗩᔕᕼI KEIᒍI ᔕᑕEᑎᗩᖇIO)

Synopsis: Akaashi and you were childhood crushes that got separated when you moved away. Social media was never enough to fill the void. What will Akaashi do when you come back and one of his teammates seems to have a crush on you?

A/N: I am not very skilled in writing scenarios so bear with me here. It’s also a female reader insert, sorry boys :(

Word count: 2522

No flowers were blooming in spring anymore for Akaashi Keiji. He was making towards the school grounds like it was just any other day. It was just another dull start to his second year of high school without you by his side. Akaashi would never forget the time you two picked flowers for your flower crowns that one spring day, mere days before school was supposed to start and you were to crouch into new school adventures. It felt like any other ordinary day outside while your mothers were sipping some tea inside the house. But, Keiji was not unfamiliar with emotions and facial expressions, even at a young age he was able to differentiate different emotions even though people tried hiding them. You were nowhere near the happy and cheerful girl that filled the silence with your childish glee and laughter. You were so quiet.

»»---------------------►

"Keiji..."

A whisper that would have been hard to hear for many, but Keiji knew your voice by heart. Looking up, his eyes were fixed on the tears filling up your eyes that were dangerously close to falling. Keiji was never the one to show much emotion or care, but this situation didn't fail to angrily burn his heart. What was going on?

Your next words burned his already aching heart even more as you let your tears freely fall down your face. Keiji didn't move. You didn't have the heart to wait for his reply so Keiji was left alone, eyes locking on your running figure that found comfort into your mother's arms. You two left soon after. Keiji was still sitting on his knees in the garden. Your neatly made flower crown on the ground was beside him and fallen apart. Was this happening?

"Keiji...I'm leaving Japan tomorrow."

»»---------------------►

The first day of school was over and he was already tired. He wanted to go back home and close himself off from the outside world for a few hours. Grab his phone and go through his gallery. Besides the huge amount of Bokuto's selfies on his phone, here and there a screenshot from his social media accounts popped up. Keiji was never the one for social media. It was a waste of time, he would say. What was the point in endlessly scrolling and looking through profiles of people you probably don't even know? But Keiji does have social media. It wasn't his choice. His mother bought him a newer phone shortly after you moved away. "So you can stay in touch even when she's so far away," his mother said to him when she gave him the phone and ruffled his hair, "there's no point in giving up, is there Keiji?"

That is how Keiji tried to stay in contact with you. You easily found each other on social media and he was glad you still wanted to talk to him. At first, your messages were frequent and filled with stories about your new school and friends. There wasn't a moment to put away your phone cause the messages kept coming. Keiji would merely reply with a "that's nice" and "hope you're liking it there", but he always read them all with a sad smile on his face. You seemed to fit in well with the people there. Keiji always admired you for that. It was you who decided to befriend this quiet, little boy in the house beside yours when you were little. He will never admit how much he appreciated you for that.

The worst part is that Keiji started developing a crush on you. He tried to talk himself out of it by seeing it was normal to have such feelings at a young age and that they will evaporate as he grows older. But they never did. You were becoming more and more beautiful as the days and seasons went by and Keiji couldn't wrap his head around what was happening with him. That little crush of his didn't go unnoticed. His mother figured it out very quickly and never failed to embarrass Keiji whenever he announced he was going out to play with you.

"You'll make a fine gentleman one day Keiji. Don't you forget that."

Unconsciously, he smiled at his mother's words as he entered the hot gym. The sounds of volleyball hitting the ground were enough to snap him out of his thoughts and refocus at the task at hand. He had practice. Bokuto Koutarou was loudly yelling at his kouhai and teasing him about how he's late and he was to do extra laps at the end of the training. The rest of the team chuckled at his words because there was no way Bokuto was going to stick to that.

"I apologize Bokuto-san. It won't happen again." Akaashi's words cut through the once cheerful atmosphere like a knife as he walked towards the locker room to change. Bokuto looked at the figure of his best friend that was soon lost with the door closing behind him. He was named captain for a reason. Bokuto Koutarou, no matter the excessive amounts of mood swings he has, knows when something is going on...and in Akaashi's case, he had quite a good guess as to what is bothering him.

When Keiji stepped foot on the court and started playing, there was no doubt in Bokuto's mind that his bad performance was caused by overflowing thoughts in his head. There was no beating around the bush in this situation, especially when the others knew about this.

"Oi Akaashi." His voice was rather serious for someone who's usually so cheerful and filled with positive energy. Keiji knew where this was leading to and he was dreading every second of it. "Isn't Y/N coming back soon?"

There it was. The ever-so sensitive topic to Akaashi Keiji. How Bokuto found out was still a mystery to him, but it was futile to hide anything from his curious senpai. He didn't mind. It was something that was in the past and there was no need to run away from it. Or at least that's how Keiji wanted his feelings to be portrayed. The ball that was being held in his hand was tossed back in with the others in the trolley as Keiji called it a day. The practice was soon to be over anyway. His teammates, especially the senpais, knew him well enough to know when Keiji is done with something so they didn't want to meddle. But meddling was Bokuto Koutarou's middle name.

"Akaashi I'm-"

"There is no need to apologize Bokuto-san. I am doing just fine and there is no guarantee that Y/N is coming back." Keiji knew he was lying, but the way those words effortlessly came out of his mouth made him think otherwise. He has told himself this lie over and over again that it sounded like the truth.

Back home, Keiji took out his phone to scroll through his gallery. He knew by heart where those screenshots of your conversations were. He started looking at them.

»»---------------------► Sept. 12th

"Heeeeey Keiji I just saw this cool painting of flowers the other day! I remember how much you loved hydrangeas! They always made your eyes pop heh"

"That sounds nice Y/N"

"You know I always think of my best friend Keiji ;)"

"Of course I do. I do the same"read 11:17pm

»»---------------------► Dec. 17th

"Hey...is everything alright there? We haven't talked in a while...I know we're both busy, but let's not let that stop us from talking!"

"Don't worry about that, but I have to go now. Sorry."

"Oh...that's okay...Take care Keiji"

"You too."read 10:47pm

»»---------------------►Feb. 8th

"Akaashi guess what! I'm moving back to Japan this year!! I can't wait to see you, I missed you so much..."seen 00:23am

»»---------------------►

Keiji would be lying if he said his heart didn't skip a beat when he saw your last text message. He didn't know how to feel. That childish glee he felt years before, while you were still here, warmed his heart and he didn't know how to react. The memories of your childhood adventures made him smile in remembrance, but was he ready for this? Were flowers blooming again in his heart?

»»---------------------►

The following day had an eerie feeling to it. Keiji wasn't sure what was happening, but it felt odd. He felt odd. Like there was a nest of angry crows battling inside of him. His head was hurting as well. Walking towards the gym, he felt as if he would pass out at any moment. Were you moving back to Japan? In the back of his mind, Keiji knew that neither his heart or his head was ready to see you again and confront you about his feelings. Maybe you were leaving a boyfriend behind. Maybe you even found a loving girlfriend. You were probably heartbroken that you had to leave your friends and move back here at such age. Was it necessary to list all the bad things about mo-

"Keiji?"

Just like a flower's bloom in spring, Keiji's heart fluttered at the sound of such a sweet and loving tone. To some, it was just an everyday voice that you could hear everywhere. To Keiji, it was a bird's chirp, a kid's giggle, a heart's warmth. There was no doubt in his mind that it was you.

"Y/N?" His eyes looked up and in the crowd of tall figures, he easily spots you. You grew up into a beautiful girl. Your face matured and so did your body. But your eyes...your eyes still held that mischievousness and happiness they had years ago when Keiji saw them filled with tears. That was a sight that haunted him for years as it was the last time Keiji saw you before your move. He couldn't have you walking out on him at the airport, your small body growing further and further away. It was a big bite to swallow for little Keiji.

But here you were, looking as beautiful as ever...with Konoha's arm over your shoulder? What even-

"Omg Keiji it's really you!" You smiled widely at the sight of your childhood friend, but your feet were planted firmly to where you were standing. You two kind of drifted apart these past few months, there was no doubt about it. He didn't even read your last message to him and you were so excited about moving back and possibly confessing to him. Would it be too much to run to him and hug him tightly? To feel all the emotions begging to be released on the surface as his arms tighten around you?

"Would it be that bad to feel your love again?"

»»---------------------►

There was no way in hell that Keiji was going to let you date Konoha. There was no problem with him or if he had a girlfriend, but it was not going to be you. It was official. You moved back to Japan for what seems forever, you were in Fukurodani and Konoha Akinori had a crush on you. Akaashi Keiji was jealous. That too was official.

Unfortunately for Keiji, you became close friends with the team so you frequented coming to practice a lot. Although the awkward silence that filled the gym whenever you and Keiji were in the same room wasn't easy to ignore, the team tried to let you two clear the air by yourselves. And no, Konoha did not have a crush on you, but he did have a plan. Make Akaashi so jealous that he has to confess to you to move on! That's right, Fukurodani does not meddle.

Konoha was pushing his limits very much and Keiji's tolerance was reaching a big, fat zero very fast. It wasn't until he bluntly asked you out on a date that Akaashi felt like waiting longer would mean losing you forever. Storming out of the gym with your forearm in his grasp, Keiji left the gym with a smirking Konoha behind.

"Akaashi- What is wrong with you!?" You pulled your arm out of his grip and stood your ground. "Who gave you the right to pull me out of there like that!?"

You were prepared with an onslaught of comments regarding his unusual behavior, but you bit your tongue. Why was he fuming in rage? There could've easily been steam coming out of his ears. But your words made him even angrier and sadder. What happened to calling him Keiji? To teasing him about how much you found his name gorgeous and fitting for such a guy like himself? You always brought a smile on his face whenever his name left your lips. Now, it was nowhere to be heard of.

He tried to calm himself down, but the years of keeping quiet and not having you around were too much for him to keep his usual calm demeanor. Turning around, he took a deep breath before opening his eyes to look at your shocked face. Taking a cautious step forwards, he took hold of your hands before continuing.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted Y/N back there. I'm also sorry for letting us drift apart." His mellow voice sounded out into the quiet, night background. There was no one in sight and Keiji felt it was easier to voice out his thoughts. "You can't imagine how much I missed you and wanted you to come back to me."

Tears were brimming in your eyes again, but this team Keiji was there to handle them when they fall.

"I love you Y/N...I did when we were kids and I...I still do now." His hand moved to wipe the stray tear slowly trickling down your face and he was quick to pull you into a hug. He was not letting you run away from him this time.

"Keiji w-why didn't you say anything before?"

He chuckled and that wonderful sound was music to your ears. "We were just kids back then. Nothing would've changed you moving away, wouldn't it?"

Keiji knew he was right. He may have doubted his decision before, but now it felt like it was the right thing to have waited this long. In the end, you were in his arms as both of you have already wanted and there was no doubt in his mind that this was exactly where you belong.

"You know what Keiji..," you moved away from his chest and lovingly took hold of his face. You couldn't have even dreamed about Keiji growing up into someone this handsome and beautiful. It was better than any painting your eyes saw of hydrangeas that reminded you of him. This in front of you, was a true piece of art. And you were happy to call it yours.

"I love you too Keiji...ever since we were kids."

No flowers were blooming in spring for Akaashi Keiji. Now, flowers were blooming in every season. In spring they were at their peak. In summer they were constantly with him and keeping him company. In autumn they would slowly start falling asleep and in winter there has always been this one flower that survived the harsh weather and snow that keeps blooming only for him. And that flower will always be you.

#akaashi keiji #akaashi x reader #akaashi #hq akaashi #akaashi angst #akaashi fluff #akaashi scenario #akaashi imagine #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu scenarios #haikyū!!#haikyuu headcanons

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gustafsnightangel · 4 years ago

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Shattered Lives Ch 34

Moving day. That was the first thought to hit his mind as he woke up, Lily’s happy chattering coming through the monitor calling for her dad dad. He looked at the sleeping woman sprawled across him and smiled before kissing her head, she was still out cold. Leaving her to sleep he slipped from the bed, pulled on a pair of sweats and padded down the hall to Lily’s room. “There’s my little lady.” He murmured and Lily squealed, her face lighting up as he came into the room. “Big day today Lily.” He said softly as he changed and dressed her for the day, she was such a happy baby, her smile and giggle always bringing her sunshine into his life. “You’re my sunshine aren’t you.” He grinned at her as those big eyes focused on him, her tiny arms wrapped around his neck as he hauled her into his arms. “Shall we go get the boys up?”

“In.” She chirped, clapping her hands.

“Yes.” He laughed. “Even Finn.” He snuggled her in, her fingers gently playing with his scruff, before tugging on it hard.

Sildie rolled over, the bed empty, the sheets still warm. Groaning her displeasure of not having him there, she sprawled out over his side of the bed and breathed him in off the linen, a smile touching her lips as she heard him and Lily over the baby monitor. The soft dad dad chattering as he changed her, the giggles as he kissed her neck while he dressed her, the firm no as she gripped his longer scruff, obviously a little too tightly. That had become a favorite past time for her, gripping his scruff and pulling hard, dad dad made interesting noises when she did that. She lay there knowing she should get up, but was too relaxed. Moving day, it would be busy, yet she wanted to drift back to sleep, the contentment she felt here in their room pulling her back under. It was short lived as the door opened and Gustaf came though with a cup of tea. “Tea in bed?” She mumbled.

“Tea in bed.” He smiled as he sat it on the nightstand and bent to kiss her. Throwing her arms around his neck she pulled him down into her in a fit of giggles. “You need to get up love.” He chuckled.

“I know.” She said kissing him sinfully.

“I love it when you kiss me like that.” He murmured.

“Were moving in together today.” She smiled, she was much happier this morning. She’d made it past Christmas and meeting his family and felt settled, even more now they were moving in together, becoming a family. This was a big move for all of them and she wondered if there would be any fallout with the boys over it, anxiety over such a big change.

“We are. Sit up and drink your tea, then come have breakfast, I think Brendan’s making pancakes.” He kissed her, that slow delicious torment. “Bill and Valter will be here around nine.”

“What time is it?” She asked nipping his jaw playfully.

“Just after seven. I think Valter wants a rematch.” He grinned and Sildie’s laugh warmed him. “I tried to warn the guy.” He loved seeing that smile, hearing that laugh.

“Maybe we can do food and games tonight, let the boys settle in a bit.” She said softly, this was going to take some getting use to that this was their house not just Gustaf’s apartment.

“Sounds good. Now, drink your tea, I need to go supervise.” He kissed her and left her to wake up fully.

Out in the kitchen Brendan was in master chef heaven as he flipped the next pancake. The twins were sitting up at the counter and Lily was getting into all sorts of mischief at his bookshelf, the place was too new for her to be focused on toys. He would have to baby proof a little more once they were moved in, he thought, as Lily pulled more books from the bottom shelf.

“You little lady, are a terror.” She squealed at him and gave him an excited dad dad as he picked her up. “Not even moved in and you’re already rearranging my stuff.” He growled playfully and kissed her neck until she giggled before putting her down again letting her wander. Watching her explore he made a mental note of what they’d need to baby proof. Also the furniture they needed to swap out from Sildie’s, the dining table being one. Not only did they need a bigger table, it was from Dana’s side of the family. He’d also feasted and fucked her on that table and liked having the memory of that night staring him in the face every morning. They were about to start their life together, as a family, and he wanted as much of her life in his as possible, furniture, stuff, emotional baggage and all. It was terrifying, yet oddly satisfying.

“Are we moving in today?” Liam asked as Brendan put pancakes in front of the twins and Gustaf picked up Lily to stop her from getting into his jazz record collection after a stern no.

“We are. Uncle Valter and Uncle Bill are going to come over and help, and then we can have some game time tonight.” He said taking a pancake and holding it for Lily to eat, they’d remembered the high chair but he just wanted Lily close, the tiny girl grounded him.

“Can we have pizza?” Finn asked as he ate.

“We’ll see, depends on how many vegetable you had yesterday.” He said with a deadpan expression.

“Aww maaaan.” Finn sulked and Gustaf chuckled.

Gustaf was about to head back into the bedroom to see if Sildie had fallen asleep when she came out showered and dressed. The boys greeted her and Brendan was all smiles telling her how much he loved Gustaf’s kitchen. He watched her snag a pancake and stand around chatting with the twins while he and Lily stood by the window.

“Our family Lily bear.” He murmured as she fed him a crumb of pancake she was shredding between her fingers.

“You making sure dad dad eats huh?” Sildie said as she stopped in front of Gustaf giving him a blazing lip lock, slow and seductive.

“You keep kissing me like that and I’m going to give the kids an education.” He growled as he nipped her bottom lip.

“I’m happy.” Her smile told him as much.

“I can see.” He chuckled, those ice blue eyes sparkling. The weight had been lifted, Christmas was done and she’d met his family, survived the grief and seemed to have turned a corner. “I love you.” He murmured and kissed her so her toes curled and that soft little whimper fell from her lips.

“I love you too.” She was humming with energy. “Go shower, I’ll take this monster.” She kissed him and took Lily. “You little miss are a disaster.” She said and Lily grinned at her with a mouthful of pancake. “Charming.” She chuckled and headed to the bathroom so she could clean her up.

With children fed and dressed they headed next door, the morning going by in a blur once Valter and Bill showed up. Valter, with a twin in either hand went to help them pack up their room and bring it down the hall to their new home, smiles and laughter filled the space. It gave the twins time to bond with Gustaf’s youngest brother, and for Valter to try and figure out how Finn was so good at Mario cart. Bill helped Brendan pack up his room and she couldn’t help but smile at their conversation.

“You made the Kladdkaka?” Bill said stunned almost stupid. “Get the fuck outta here, really?”

“Yeah, really.” Brendan’s smile was huge.

“Damn, kid, you got some mad tasty making skills. Dad couldn’t stop raving about it and I know Eija hid one all for herself.” Bill told the teen as he placed more books in a box, the kid had enough to open library.

Leaving them to their packing Sildie took a few boxes of personal items over placing them in the bottom of her closet, she’d get to those later. They were memories she wanted to keep but too painful to have out. One day she’d sit on the floor with a bottle of wine and sort through it all. Memories of her brother, her parents, of her family that had left her. She shut all the emotions down that went with it, not now. She collected Lily from Gustaf, the little lady overwhelmed with so much activity around her she was clinging to mum mum or dad dad like her life depended on it.

“Hang over here with her for a bit. We’ll get the rest, there’s not much more anyway.” He said gently, he could see she was a little stressed, emotions sitting just below the surface.

“Are you bringing the table over?” She asked as her hand rested on his chest.

“Yeah we’ll get that here in a little while. Any other furniture?”

“Just the display case but I have to take everything out and I’d rather do that tomorrow when we know where it’s going to live. I was thinking my office so it’s out the way.” She said not really wanting to deal with all that glass and crystal at the moment.

“Where would you like it to go?” He asked snaking an arm around her and kissing her forehead, he sensed her unease.

“I don’t know.” Her exhale was tense. “It’s all full of family crystal and glass and I don’t want it in your apartment cluttering up your space.” She said quickly, without thinking.

“Look at me.” He gently hooked a finger under her chin and waited until her eyes met his. “It’s our space, our home, you can put it wherever the hell you want, love. It’s important to you.” He kissed her, that slow tenderness that filled her with love. “And if it’s important to you, then it’s important to me. This is our home now, you and me. There’s no more Gustaf’s apartment, it’s ours.” She nodded, resting her forehead against his and just settled herself. “Be with Lily, maybe curl up and have a nap. We can do more tomorrow, there’s no rush and it’s only next door.” He toyed with a stray wave that had come loose from her clip.

“I might just lay with Lily for a bit, see if she’ll go down for a nap.” She kissed him. “I love you sweet man.”

“Love you too.” He kissed her and watched her walk to Lily’s room and close the door. She would be ok, he thought, just overwhelmed. He was expecting tears later tonight and hoped the grief wouldn’t consume her, she’d got past Christmas and he was determined to have today go smoothly and as drama free as moving can be.

Gustaf was just stepping out of his apartment to check on the boys when he spotted Lucas walking to Sildie’s door, bouquet of flowers in hand. Fuck me, he fumed, does the guy ever fucking quit? So much for drama free. He wanted to storm over and throw a fist in his face for being here and for the pain he’d caused Sildie, but the defeated look that hunched his shoulders held him in check. “Lucas?” He said as he closed the door to his apartment for the moment until he knew exactly what was going on. He would shield Sildie from this if necessary.

“Gustaf, hey.” Lucas turned facing him, his hand raking through his hair, the guy looked emotionally beat to hell. “Sildie not home?”

“She’s home.” He said and hiked a thumb over his shoulder. “We’re in the process of moving everything in.” Gustaf kept a lid on his anger, something wasn’t quite right here, he could feel it.

“Ah, gotcha.” Lucas was nervous, how did he apologize? How did he make everything right between the three of them? He’d fucked up royally and may have lost a good friend because of it. Suck it up and just fucking say it, he scolded himself. “Look, I owe you an apology for the other night.” He said quietly and looked Gustaf dead in the eye.

Gustaf stayed silent, giving the man in front of him time to say what he had come here to say. Had it just been Lucas, he would have decked him for showing up after the shit storm Saturday night, but with Ana in the mix, things weren’t what they seemed on the outside.

“I was an idiot. I was also disrespectful and rude.”

At least he was honest, Gustaf thought.

“Sildie was right, I’d let Ana hoodwink me into thinking you were something that you’re not. It’s no excuse and I should have seen it for what it was, seen Ana for what she is and not allow myself to get caught up in her lies.”

Gustaf let the breath slowly shudder out of him, relieved the guy had seen the light. “She’s nasty business is what she is.” He murmured. “And seeing that while in a relationship with her isn’t as easy as it sounds.”

“No, no it’s not...” Lucas sighed. “...and she’s not someone I intend on seeing ever again. She used me, stole from me, hurt me, hurt those that I care about.” Lucas took a breath.

Lucas saw Gustaf’s eyes flick to the flowers and then back to his.

“Peace offering for Sildie, an apology.” He said quickly. “Ana had painted an ugly picture of you, using the ’my friend dated him’ story. I don’t know why I believed her over trusting Sildie’s judgement. I said some things I’m not proud of, she deserved better from me. I don’t even know what’s true and what isn’t anymore.”

“You’re damn right she deserved better. She doesn’t need any more grief than she’s already been handed.” Gustaf said and let the fury ride the edge of his voice. He waited a beat to let that sink in. “However, it’s difficult to see a full picture when you only have half the story, or told half the story, and more difficult when that half of the story is full of lies with the intent to be misleading.” Gustaf murmured.

“You should be a lawyer.” Lucas said with a wry smile.

“So I’ve been told.” Gustaf smirked.

“One thing I know for certain is Sildie’s happy with you. You only have to watch the two of you together to see it. She made her choice and I have to respect that. You were right, she deserves to have her choices respected and I didn’t. I crossed a line on Saturday, several actually, but none more so than your sobriety. It’s none of my business and for what it’s worth, I’m sorry. There’s a lot I can’t take back and apologizing doesn’t seem enough.”

“It’s enough.” Gustaf said simply. He wasn’t about to drag this out just to be an asshole, he could, but the guy was clearly hurting. He’d just endured and survived Ana, and he needed to know there was some restitution that wasn’t going to cost him another piece of his soul.

“Thank you.” Lucas breathed out a relieved sigh. “And thanks for not punching my lights out even though I deserved it.” He said seriously.

“I made a promise to Sildie I’d keep my hands to myself.” Gustaf said.

“I’ll be sure to thank her for that too. Any chance I could talk to her?” Lucas asked, chewing his lip nervously. “I need to give her this.” He held up her award. “She left it on the table.”

“She doesn’t want it.” Gustaf shook his head not wanting to have that fucking thing shoved in her face today.

“I know.” Lucas sighed. “Something else I have to apologize to her for.” He said quietly as he looked at it and Gustaf looked at him puzzled. “Long story.”

“Wait out here, I’ll go see if she wants to see you. It’s been an emotional few days, I won’t push her.” Gustaf’s tone was friendly, but with an air of don’t fuck with me on this.

“Fair enough.” Lucas said as Gustaf walked away. “I wouldn’t blame her if she never wants to see me again.” He mumbled to himself. Gustaf left Lucas near the elevator and headed inside his apartment. Oh fucking fuck, he thought as he walked through the door. This had the potential to blow up in his face and for Sildie to lose her shit, or fall apart, neither of which he wanted to have happen, especially today.

“There you are.” Sildie beamed as he shut the door, Lily apparently not happy about their idea of a nap, hot on Sildies heels. “I was wondering where you’d disappeared to.”

“I’m here.” He kissed her tenderly.

“What’s wrong?” She said looking at him, picking up on his hesitation at telling her who was outside their home.

“Lucas is outside, he’d like a word.” His tone gentle. “He came to apologize to me and would like to speak with you.”

“He apologized to you?” Her shock was genuine, she hadn’t expected it, at least not yet with Ana fucking with his head.

“He did.” He kissed her sweetly. “The guys a wreck Sildie, hear him out.”

She looked at him as Lily started to fuss and wanted to be picked up. “I’m not sure I want to talk to him. I’m still pretty pissed at him actually.”

“Then let him see it. He needs to know he fucked up and you’re not ok with it.” He kissed her temple tenderly. “But he also needs to be able to apologize. She fucked him up love, remember that before you rip him to shreds.”

“Yeah you’re right.” She sighed, her shoulders slumped. Could they just get through today without shit hitting the fan? “Can you put him in my office while I try and get Lily down again? I have a few things to say to him too.” She picked Lily up and the kid snuggled to her.

“Sure.” He kissed her tenderly. “You ok?”

“Yeah, I will be, and you’re right, we need to clear the air.” She kissed Lily’s head as the little girl sobbed quietly. “And this one is all out of sorts, she doesn’t know what or who she wants.” She kissed him softly.

“Big changes today.” He wrapped her in a hug. “My two best girls. She’ll settle tonight once everyone’s here and we get back to normal.” He kissed them both and watched them walk down the hall to Lily’s room.

He waited until Sildie and Lily were tucked away before collecting Lucas and putting him in Sildie’s office. As he came out he took Lily from Sildie as she walked past, the little lady not happy about her nap at all, and kissed her sweetly. “No redecorating.” He murmured and her chuckle made him breathe easier.

“I’ll keep my hands to myself.” She promised.

“Make sure he does too.” His tone was serious. Even though the guy had apologized and said he was moving on didn’t mean shit when his heart still wanted Sildie. He sent Lucas a glare over the top of her head, touch her and you’re dead.

Lucas could clearly see the message in his glare, don’t touch my woman, don’t fuck with my woman, it was not unexpected. Gustaf looked down at Sildie once Lucas gave him the slight nod that the message had been received, loud and clear. He realized he’d judged Gustaf unfairly. He was a gentle soul, a far cry from what Ana had painted him to be. He watched him with Lily, the boys smiling as they ran past. Seeing Sildie and Gustaf together broke him, the love she had for him. His shoulders slumped as he watched the photos on the digital frame. She was happy, the kids were happy, she’d never be his now and he had to move past it. He had to find a way to get over her.

He’d fucked up and he was expecting Sildie’s wrath. The woman was formidable and he’d only seen her lose it with Quinn once, he braced himself for what was to come. She had a temper and he’d done everything perfectly to be on the receiving end of it. What’s worse is he knew she’d fight for Gustaf too, because that’s the sort of person she is.

Bill and Valter were in and out of the apartment with boxes from storage for the kids as Sildie closed her office door. Lucas stood staring at the digital frame, the photos cycling through the trip to the snow. “Hello Lucas.” She said bluntly, she could see the guy was hurting by the slump in his shoulders, the tiredness in his smile. She’d seen enough of that in Gustaf at Ana’s whim. Didn’t mean she wasn’t angry at him. She’d let him say his piece and depending on what that was entirely depended on whether she lost her shit at him.

“Hi. He looks like a younger version of Quinn.” He said pointing to Brendan in the photo.

“Yeah. It’s like looking at a ghost from the past.” She said softly.

“Lily looks so much like Dana.” He said wistfully, staring at the photo before it changed and he focused on Sildie.

“I came by to give you this, you left it behind.” He said handing her that damn award she didn’t fucking want.

“Thanks.” She sighed. “I don’t know why they gave me the bloody thing. Seems kind of stupid to award me the award that I helped set up.” She sat it on her desk, at least it was pretty. Hand blown glass of different shades of blue, maybe she could hide it at work somewhere on a bookshelf.

“It didn’t go to you, not at first.” Lucas said looking at the law books in the shelves. He smiled remembering Quinn and Sildie huddled around a table studying from the same books at college.

“What do you mean?” She frowned, puzzled at his remark.

“It was originally given to me.” He said and turned to look at her. How could he not fall for her, those eyes he’d always drowned in.

“Ok, I’m confused.” She said and leaned a hip on her desk crossing her arms. She’d have to look at getting a chair for this room for visitors.

“The Bar Association told me I was receiving it so I’d be at the dinner. I declined the award stating it should go to you.” He said quietly, her eyes landing on his, all he saw was pain.

“Why Lucas? Why would you do that? You’ve worked hard and should be recognized.” She said abashed. “And why the fuck would you do that to me, shove all that grief in my face, in front of everyone?”

“Because I’m obviously a self centered asshole.” He breathed out honestly. “I didn’t think Sildie.”

“No, no you didn’t fucking think.” She growled.

“I’m not half the lawyer you are Sildie and if I didn’t decline it, you’d never be recognized for the incredible work you’ve done.” He continued, his voice defeated. “They would never have awarded it to you because you helped create it, even though you are everything that award encompasses.”

“Shit Lucas.” She sighed.

“I’ve watched you get overlooked so many times. Always paying second fiddle to Quinn. I loved the guy like a brother, but his arrogance and ego cost you opportunities to excel and to be seen in this country for what you’re worth, his shadow was large and far reaching. Don’t get me wrong.” He said seeing the touch of anger on her face at his words and held up his hand to stop her interruption. “Quinn was everything you and Oliver laid out in your speeches, but you are so much more, you always have been. The Association fought me on it, they didn’t want to give it to you, but I pushed them because you...” He choked up. “Because it was the one way, the one thing I could do to show the world, to show Quinn, that you are as good as, if not better than your brother ever was. It was my idiotic way of trying to let you fucking shine for once, to be recognized for not only the incredible person you are but the attorney you’ve become.” He looked at her and let the breath go. And because I love you, he added silently. “I’m sorry Sildie, I fucked up. I realize now that it hurt you, I hadn’t thought it though enough to see it.”

“It did.” She said softly. It had hurt so deeply, but she’d never let anyone see it but Gustaf. Lucas didn’t get to see that side of her, he hadn’t earned her trust. “Not many know this but I left for those exact reasons. Quinn was a damn good lawyer and he overshadowed everyone Lucas not just me. It was easier for me to leave than cut him down.” She looked at him. “Thank you for the nod, and although it’s appreciated, it wasn’t necessary.”

“Well again, I’m sorry that it hurt you. That was never my intention. I didn’t want to hurt you Sil but I have and I feel like dirt.” His heart was bleeding, he wanted to beg her to be with him but knew it wasn’t what he’d come here to do. No, he’d come here to let her go, to let himself grieve for her, and the life they would never have.

She let him have the silence sensing he had more to say.

“These are also for you.” He said, once he had his emotions under control and handed her the flowers. “A piss poor attempt at apologizing for everything. I stepped over several lines the other night and I need to make it right with you.” He held up his hand to stop her from speaking before jamming both in his pockets. He couldn’t touch her, wanted to, but she wasn’t his to touch, she wasn’t his to love. “Please, hear me out I need to get all this out before I fucking lose it.” His huffed chuckle was stiff as he leaned against the wall and fought the emotions that wanted to erupt from him. “I love you, Sildie, I’ve been in love with you since college and I don’t think that’s ever going to change. But, I crossed a line in your office a few months ago and the other night out of jealousy. Not my finest moments and I’m not proud of what I said or how I made you and Gustaf feel.” He breathed and thought about his next words carefully. “I figured if I could show you what he was... if you knew.” He left it hanging not able to find the right words. “I was so fucking stupid.”

“Lucas he told me the first real date we had. For the record he’s been clean for seven years, sober for five. Do you honestly think I’d let him anywhere near the kids if he was high, or drunk?” She spat, her anger getting the better of her briefly.

Lucas shook his head. “I was too far up my own ass to see it. All I saw was someone with a checkered past being with you the way I’d always wanted, while being fed lies about a man I wanted to watch you kick to the curb. It made me fucking crazy.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair.

“I’m in love with him Lucas.” She said gently, the guy was reeling enough from Saturday to not have her kick him in the guts about it all over again, but she had to make sure he heard her. “I meant what I said the other night, I don’t love you, not like that. You’re my brothers friend and a colleague that I respect. That’s all we’re ever going to be.” She said it calmly and kindly. “You need to get past that.”

“I know, I get it.” He smiled. “I don’t like it, but I get it. I’d like us to be work friends, be able to talk after a case. I miss that.” His smile was one of acceptance. He knew she was never going to be his, friends would be better than cutting her out of his life altogether. Though he was going to have to stay away from her for a while until the sting of seeing her and Gustaf together faded.

“I’ve missed it too. You’re a good adversary Lucas, but an even better sounding board.” Her tone remained gentle as she reigned in her fury, that wouldn’t solve anything now.

“I hope he knows how lucky he is.” Lucas said looking at her from under his lashes, his head still bowed.

“He does. He also knows what he has to lose.” She told him.

“Somehow I don’t think he’s going to let you get away.” He smiled and took a deep steadying breath. “Can I tell you what happened after the party? I’d like you to know but only if...”

“Sure.” He was wiping the slate clean, or trying to at least, she had to give him the opportunity to be heard. She didn’t really want to hear it but for the sake of the man in front of her he looked as though he needed a friend to talk to.

“Before I met Ana I was only aware of Gustaf’s addiction and drinking from what I heard in the tabloids like everyone else. She, as you are no doubt aware, spun a completely different story. You were right, I should have seen it for the bullshit it was, I should have kept my nose out of your business. Hindsight is a wonderful thing and she is very convincing. She played me, especially with my love for you, played me like a fucking fool. For all of that I’m sorry, I’ve apologized to Gustaf as well, I fucked up and I feel like shit because of what I let happen.” He looked to the ceiling and wrestled with the tears, she could feel them wanting to burst from him. “To cut a long story short we had a rather heated argument once we got home Saturday. After what had transpired Ana and I split that night, but not before I found out she was high. Her sob story, all the lies and bullshit, nothing was adding up, more questions than answers, her stories becoming more elaborate to cover her own ass. She lied to me, cheated on me, almost drained my savings and it would have been water under the bridge until I found the stash of drugs in my apartment as she was packing them into her suitcase.”

“Shit Lucas.” Sildie’s gut plummeted. “What?”

“Yeah.” He scrubbed a hand over his face.

“What are you going to do?” She asked tentatively, her voice catching. She had so many questions spring into her mind.

“Already done. As she was packing her bags calling me every name under the sun I called the police. She was charged Sunday with possession with the intent to distribute, and were not talking party drugs Sil, were talking heavy shit.” He looked at her, she saw it now, fear.

“She used your money to buy it?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“Looks that way.” He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face. The guy looked as if he’d aged overnight.

“You could be disbarred for this?” Her gut sank further, this could ruin him, his life, his career, everything.

“I know.” He said softly. Sildie was stunned.

“Do you have a lawyer?” She asked gently, not wanting to pry but also wanting to make sure he was protected as much as she could.

“Lindstrom.” He said simply. “They haven’t charged me with anything... yet.”

“Good choice.”

“He has my statement and all documentation. I can’t tell you anymore than that. This is probably going to drag you into court Sildie, especially after the conversation Saturday, and maybe Gustaf.”

“Shit.” She breathed.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what her end game is, it’s a fucking mess.” He sighed. “I don’t know if she went through me to get to you because of Gustaf or what, but she’s fucking crazy and I don’t know what she’ll decide to do.”

“It’s ok. It’ll be fine, and it’ll give me a chance to serve up some karma.” She spat. “I’ll talk to Gustaf, he has his own team of lawyers if it amounts to anything.”

His chuckle at her tone made him smile, the first one she’d seen since he’d been in her office. “You always were a spitfire.”

“Still am.” She snorted.

“Fuck Sildie, I’m so sorry. I never meant this to drag you through the shit too, but it might.” His sigh was a mixture of defeat and relief, his body and mind done what it had to do and now needed rest.

“We’ll deal with that if and when it gets to it.”

“She’s going to drag everyone into her shit storm.” He mumbled. “I wish I’d never met her.”

“She can try. Lies aren’t going to get her far, not with Lindstrom in your corner. I’ve gone up against him, he’s hard core and ice cold.” She said strongly, she hated seeing him so beaten up. “Lindstrom will see you taken care of. Has she lawyered up yet?”

“I don’t know if she’s lawyered, but I’ll do everything I can to keep you and Gustaf out of it.” And he would, he’d take the hit to keep her out of this crap.

“I appreciate it, but understand if you can’t we’ll just have to ride it out.”

There was a polite knock on the door before Gustaf opened it, Lily wailing for her mum mum. “Sorry to interrupt, but this little lady wants you.” He said chuckling.

“It would seem so.” Sildie said with a smile as Lily reached out for her and curled in close once she’d made contact, the soft hiccuped sobs of a child well past the point of no return.

“I need to get going anyway and let you guys finish moving in.” Lucas said knowing he couldn’t hang around and see them together and remain sane, not yet. He needed time and he had bigger problems. “I’ve chewed up enough of your time. Thanks for the ear.”

“Anytime.” Sildie said as she walked him to the elevator.

“Thanks. And thanks for not decking me the other night, even though I deserved it.” He pushed the button for the elevator.

“Had it not been Ana, had I not known the history between her and Gustaf, I might have.” She smirked. “Don’t come at him again Lucas.” Her warning needed no elaboration and he nodded.

“Understood.”

“Question, is she still in custody or out on bail?” Sildie asked as the elevator doors opened.

“Out on bail I think, I can check.”

“Do me a favor and keep me in the loop as much as you can. I want to know where she is at all times.” She chewed on her bottom lip thinking.

“You think she might make a run for the kids?” His heart lurched. Oh fuck, he thought, what have I done?

“I sort of pissed on her parade the other night. I wouldn’t put it past her to try. She’s not one to hold back on spiteful revenge on being stood up to, she didn’t like me calling her out on her bullshit.” Her shrug wasn’t convincing, she was worried too. “If she’s the narcissist I think she is she’ll know that getting to the kids will hurt me more than coming straight at me.”

“I’ll keep you updated.” He nodded. Hell he’d hire a fucking PI to follow the bitch.

“Brendan’s room Bill.” She said, as Bill walked past with a box and a questioning look. She said her goodbyes to Lucas and headed into her apartment as Valter helped Finn with some of his toys. They were nearly done as the rest of the furniture was staying.

“You ok?” Gustaf asked as she stood in her room that they’d cleaned out earlier and slipped his arm around her waist, his lips nipping her neck.

“Yes and no.” She said vaguely which told him her mind was elsewhere as she rocked Lily side to side, at least she’d stopped crying now.

“Good talk with Lucas?” He pushed.

She blew a breath out. “Yes and no.” She chuckled. “He apologized and gave me the damn award back.” She told him about why it was given to her and Gustaf shrugged. “It’s like a fucking boomerang.” She muttered.

“Can’t fault his logic. I never knew your brother but you’re a kick ass lawyer. I’ve seen you love, you’re everything that award stands for.” He kissed her temple and breathed her in, home. No matter where they were as long as she was with him he was home.

“You ready for the kicker?” She sighed, not really wanting to put Ana in his head again.

“Kicker?” She turned in his arms and kissed him tenderly before filling him in on Ana and Lucas.

“Well fuck me.” He groaned looking skyward.

“Yeah, kind of what I said. It’s bad, he could be disbarred for it.” Her fingers wandered under the hem of his shirt, the need to feel him, to ground herself.

“Shit, really?” His gut lurched. He didn’t like the guy, but he didn’t deserve to lose his career over it.

“Yeah. They haven’t charged him with anything yet and he’s lawyered up. Here’s hoping that’s enough.” She sighed.

“Is there anything we can do?” She was a little taken back by his question. “He’s an asshole Sildie not a murderer, he doesn’t deserve to lose his livelihood because of that woman.” His tone had an edge of ice to it.

“We may get dragged into it.” She said gently, his eyes widening slightly at the possibility.

“Fuuuuuck. Ok.” He breathed out. “I need to call a few people.”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “I’m sorry love.”

“No.” He growled. “No. You don’t get to apologize for her.” He hugged her tightly, the kiss at her temple lingering as he breathed her in and calmed. He would talk to his lawyers and see what he could do to protect them and then see if he could help Lucas out. He didn’t want to see the guy swing for it. “You don’t apologize for her, ever.” He murmured and held his two best girls close.

By six they were exhausted, drained from the packing and unpacking and merging two households together. There was more to move across but the kids were successfully moved in and unpacked, which was the main objective of the day. With the kids on the couch starting a Mario cart game, Valter and Bill moved the dining table into Gustaf’s apartment and moved his smaller one into Sildie’s. Gustaf snuggled Lily in as he ordered pizza, both he and Sildie didn’t care what the kids ate tonight as long as it was food. “That’s a solid table.” Bill chuckled as Sildie came into the dining room and helped with the chairs.

“It is, Dana’s grandfather made it for her grandmother as a wedding gift.” She’d heard the stories from Dana, the love for the table when she was growing up, it was excellent for hiding under. “And I think there’s a story for every nick and scratch on it.” She chuckled.

“Is that it for today?” Bill asked.

“Yes, thanks so much. You guys made the day much easier.” She said walking back to the kitchen to find Gustaf putting the kettle on.

“Pizza is on its way.” He said to the adults.

“Awesome, now excuse me while I go kick this kids ass.” Valter grinned. “I’ve been waiting patiently all day.”

“Ha! Good luck with that.” Gustaf laughed as he prepared to take on Finn yet again.

“She’s so tired.” Sildie said, gently stroking her knuckles down Lily’s cheek, the little girl sobbing quietly. She’d been beyond it for half the day and had refused to nap in case she missed anything.

“She’s had a busy day exploring.” He kissed her brow and lingered before kissing it again. “Our home.”

“I know.” She smiled up at him. “Feels so different, good different.” It would take some time to process it all, for their mental and emotional state to catch up with reality of living together, even though they were practically doing that in her apartment minus the stuff.

Bill answered the door to collect the pizza and the Mario cart war was placed on hold while they ate. Finn and Liam had taken a shine to Valter, almost like an older, bigger brother. Finn happily sitting in Valters lap while he drove Mario cart rings around him. She smiled as her phone pinged, the incoming text making that smile drop from her face. Four words that made her gut churn.

She’s out on bail. Karlsson representing. When I know more I’ll call.

Sildie showed Gustaf the screen and his face revealed nothing. She was good at reading him, but he had a poker face when it came to Ana. He snaked an arm around her hips and pulled her close.

“Good to know, but we’ll be fine.” He kissed her on that one spot below her ear and she relaxed into him.

He was right, the cameras and door feed he had installed Christmas Eve on his hunch gave them an unobstructed view of the hall, elevator, and stairs. If she got in the building they would see her before she got to the door. Gustaf also had a panic button installed on the touchscreen to alert security in the building which was attached to an app for her phone. “I’ll keep us safe love.” He said softly. “At whatever cost.” He was not going to let that bitch destroy this, this home he’d made for them, for the kids to feel normal, for them to move past all the grief in their lives. No, he thought, she doesn’t get to set foot in here and touch this, to fuck with this.

“I asked Lucas to keep me in the loop.” She murmured and kissed him, that sweetness relaxing the tension in his shoulders.

“As he should. I don’t think she’ll do anything, but it doesn’t hurt to know what’s going on.” She was worried he could see it in her eyes as she tried to soothe him. “Who’s Karlsson?”

“Her lawyer. He’s good, not as good as Lindstrom.” She said quietly. “It just depends on how much bullshit she spins, but he’s no idiot. If she lies to him she ties his hands and he can’t help her. It’s going to be very interesting because all her lies, her entire facade is about to fall down around her.” She shrugged. “Karma’s a bitch when you screw with her.”

“Can’t say I’m shedding any tears for her over here.” He chuckled.

“Me either. She deserves whatever’s coming to her.” I just hope we can stay the hell out of it, she added silently.

After dinner and ice cream he put Lily to bed and watched her a moment. “You are my sunshine Lily bear.” He whispered, sitting on the floor she held his finger, her eyes dropping and eventually closing. “Sleep little lady, I’ll be here tomorrow when you wake up.”

He closed the door quietly before heading back to the living area and grabbed the monitor from the kitchen counter. Sildie had just made tea and set it on the coffee table and he waited for her to pour before pulling her into the one seat with him. They sat watching the game, the kids, and a pair of brothers smile and laugh, until those laughs turned into yawns. Bill used the same line as Sildie when the twins started to whine about having to go to bed a few hours later. “I want to come play another day guys but I can’t do that if you make a fuss. Mum said bed. Hop too.” He said quietly.

“Can you come over tomorrow?” Liam asked.

“Not tomorrow buddy. I have a few things I have to do at my own home, but soon ok? After new year.”

“Ok.” Liam’s tone was disappointment.

“Sorry Sildie.” He chuckled as Liam sulked off to bed.

She laughed. “It’s fine, they’ll get used to it. Besides, Liam’s the button pusher. He will push the limits to the furthest degree possible.”Sildie and Gustaf walked his brothers to the door, a promise of a get together after New Years for more games and pizza. With the door shut and the kids getting ready for bed the apartment was quiet for perhaps the first time since early this morning. Gustaf read to the twins while Brendan read his book curled up him his new room, normal, routine.

“You ok?” Sildie asked as she stood at the door looking at all the other stuff he’d put away in his room.

“Yeah, tired.” He yawned.

“You’re ok with living here?” She was hoping he was still ok with it as he’d not said anything against moving in with Gustaf.

“Yeah, it’s different but I like it. Bigger room and my stuff’s all here now.” He looked at her and then around her to make sure Gustaf wasn’t there and only continued when he heard him reading. “Did we upset Gustaf with the dad thing?” He asked nervously.

“No honey, he just needs time.” She sat on the bed with him and squeezed his foot. “He’s more worried that he’s going to overstep a line with you guys and the memory of you father, that’s all. And though your logic is sound, Quinn’s not here and Gustaf is, he needs time to feel like he can be that person for you, within himself. He knows he can be, he just has to believe in himself, that takes time. Make sense?”

Brendan nodded. “We wanted him to know but we didn’t want to upset him.”

“Give it some time, there’s no rush. Just let it happen. If the moment feels right for you to call him dad then do it, otherwise just call him Gustaf. It’s a learning curve for all four of you.” She said softly and Brendan nodded, he understood. “Don’t stay up too late ok? I’ll need you to help with some stuff tomorrow.”

“Sure. Love you mum.” He said grinning slyly.

“Oh I see, give Gustaf the ease in but not me.” She grinned as she walked to the door.

“You’ve always been mum, you just didn’t like it.” He smiled.

She didn’t have it in her to tell him she still hated it. She wasn’t mother material. “It’s grown on me.” She chuckled as she closed the door.

With the twins seen to Gustaf came out to the living room and closed the hall door as soft jazz wafted through the apartment. He saw Sildie sitting at the table staring out the window, lost in thought. His kiss to the nape of her neck snapped her out of it with a sharp inhale.

“Far away there love.” He chuckled.

“Sorry.” She snorted. “I was far far away.”

“You ok?” He massaged the rocks in her shoulders hoping her time off would ease that stress in her body now Christmas was done.

“I am, you?”

“A little tired but ok.” He kissed her head and sat next to her. “We got a fair bit done today.”

“It feels good, but so different.” She said, that smile lighting up her face.

“I love you.” His tone soft.

“Sweet man.” She climbed into his lap and straddled him. Her kiss was hot and hungry. “I’m so in love with you it’s ridiculous.” His laugh made all those crows feet dance at the corners of his eyes and she brushed her thumb along them before stifling a yawn.

“Let me take you to bed my love. You’re tired and need sleep.” He was happy beyond words, she was here with him, together.

“I’m not that tired.” She said mischievously and ghosted her lips with hers.

“Then I had better see to it that you’re sufficiently worn out.” He growled and her giggle made his cock twitch.

She climbed off his lap and cleared the pizza boxes and teapot while he locked the front door and engaged the electronic lock at the top. That was new, even if Ana managed to get a key, she still couldn’t get in once that was engaged, and the kids couldn’t reach it. Was it overkill, sure, was it being paranoid, perhaps, did he give a fuck, not one. He would keep Sildie and the kids protected, especially from toxic, fucked up people like Ana. He’d come too far to let her get her claws into him again, and he sure as hell wasn’t letting her anywhere near the kids.

She stripped and took a quick shower before crawling into bed, Gustaf doing much the same. It felt good to wash off the sweat and dust from cleaning out her apartment. His groan as he got horizontal made her chuckle. “I know right.”

“It’s been a long ass day.” He sighed and rolled over so he was pressed against her. “We’re in our room, with no baby in here with us. It feels weird.” He chuckled, his fingers teasing her hair, he loved the feel of it through his fingers.

“I know but I’m liking it.” She purred and kissed him until his brain melted, that soft groan doing things to her. “I’m liking it a lot.” Her hands cupped his face and held him to her as she kissed him, that sweetness flowing out of her. She was so damn happy. Things felt right with him, moving in together, the kids, everything.

She felt him harden against her thigh, the feel of that thick length arousing her system. “Touch me.” She breathed as those skilled hands did as she asked, with a tenderness that almost made her weep. His head dipped down to kiss her neck, her throat, as a hand palmed her breast. She wanted to feel him against her, his soothing weight, a toned body that danced with hers so beautifully.

He slipped his arm under her and cradled her head, mouth devouring hers, passion, heat, love, poring out of them both. “My Sildie.” He murmured as he hooked her leg over his hip and stroked his fingers down it, he couldn’t touch her enough. “My goddess.” He groaned as he slipped into her, silky walls enveloping him. “God you’re beautiful.” His tone deep as he took her slowly. Wrapping her legs around him she arched up to meet his thrusts taking him in to her core, fingers digging into his back keeping him close. He made love to her, strong, powerful, loving, the emotion welling up in both of them. She came, that soft cry as he tipped her over the edge into bliss, the way her pussy stroked him to release. She felt his cock pulse inside her as he came, the long, deep thrusts filling her until they were sated.

Relaxing on top of her he kissed her thoroughly, enjoying the feel of her under him, loose and soft. “What’s your plan for tomorrow?” He asked taking his time kissing and tasting her neck.

“The display case.” She said quietly, her fingers trailing his scruff, her eyes drinking in the sight of him.

“It makes you sad doesn’t it?” His kiss tender.

“Yeah, but I need to just get it done. Emotional can of worms, you know? There’s a lot of my parents in there as well as Quinn and Dana.” He kissed her, wanting nothing more than to take that grief from her.

“It doesn’t have to be tomorrow love, it can wait if you’re not up for it.”

“I want to get it done.” She breathed out, her voice on the edge of breaking.

“Fair enough. I’ll keep the kids busy, you get it done, do what you need to do.” His fingers trailed the line of her jaw. “I love you.” He said gently. “Get it done and you can fall apart after.”

“I love you too sweet man.” She pulled his face to hers and kissed him. “So much.”

“Don’t let tomorrow worry you now, ok?” He kissed her tenderly. “Time for sleep, for rest.”

“Taking care of me.” Her smirk playful.

“Always love.” His kiss was devastating, completely overwhelming her system.

“Illegal.” She breathed when he let her up for air.

“Still gonna go it.”

“Mmm good.” She felt him harden inside her, as she deepened the kiss to borderline smoldering, her hips rocking against him, the slow hit grind.

“God Sildie.” His growl making her giggle wickedly. “On your side.” He whispered, nipping her throat as he moved to roll her over. Getting to his knees he straddled her bottom leg and thrust slowly as he hooked her top leg around his hip. He caged her in pressing his body to hers as he thrust, mouth devouring her neck. “Fuck Sildie, you feel so good.” He choked as he buried himself deeply, her soft cry making him throb for her.

She gripped him behind the neck and turned her head to kiss him, slow strokes of his thick cock filling her. “Gustaf.”

“Come for me love. Let me watch you come.” He got to his knees and pushed her hips open, driving into her. She gripped his thigh and arched with the change of angle, his cock caressing every inch of her. He watched as she arched and cried out, her pussy pulsing around him. “So beautiful.” He growled, his pace quickening slightly before he erupted, coming hard. He collapsed on top of her and rolled so she was sprawled on top of him, panting as much as he was. She giggled as he peppered her forehead with kisses.

“Mmm you feel good.” She purred sleepily, her hands roaming, lean muscle, those dips and valleys of his body moulding with hers.

“So do you love.” He growled, those soft curves pressed against him, his hands fanning out over her back and the sweep of her ass. “Sleep now.”

“You wore me out.” She yawned.

“All part of my plan.” He chuckled.

“Were a family.” She mumbled into his chest.

“Yes we are.”

“I love you.” She breathed.

“I love you too, sleep now.” Kissing her temple he pulled the covers over them, quite content to be smothered in her scent, her body draped over him. He felt her melt into him as his arms wrapped around her, holding her close, safe, secure.

She’d moved in with him, all her things were here, the kids were here, their life was here, with him. He’d never felt so full of joy and fear at the same time, a fear that he’d somehow, one day, fuck this all up. He banished those thoughts, knowing it was Ana and all her manipulation, her vindictiveness that gave him those feelings. Chewing over her conversation with Lucas, his own thoughts drifted to worse case scenarios as exhaustion pulled him under.

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#gustaf skarsgard #gustaf skarsgard fanfiction #shattered lives

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