#Angela Oberer

[therealmrpositive]

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever (2009)

In today's review, I find more than love is in the air at the local high school. As I attempt a #positive review of Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever #NoahSegan #RustyKelley #AlexiWasser #GiuseppeAndrews #ReganDeal #MarcSenter #MichaelBowen #LindseyAxelsson

There was a time when the fear of infectious diseases was reserved for the offshoots of conspirational thinking, not a major policy to constantly worry about. Teens could go about their lives without worrying about Zoom classes, masks, and the like, while it would be nice to go back to such a time, such precautions may have been invaluable in certain fictional settings. In 2009, a follow-up to…

[valkyrietilvalhalla]

👶 "Do you know the story of how your parents met?" (can be any second parent)

Muse’s Kid Answers | Accepting

“Mama told me that they met when Ober Wash was still new and before they were famous heroes! But I think they’re just my mama and my daddy and I don’t think they’re heroes.” Liam looks partially confused as he speaks, tilting his head, before he’s bouncing again. “Mama said it was love at first bite-”

“Sight,” Angela corrects gently, smiling at the bouncing toddler.

“Sight and when she says that, daddy gets all red and then they kiss!”

[superceia]

My dearest, your Junkrat and Mercy story is fantastic!

OH!!! MY GOODNESS!!!!! Thank you so so so much!!! GUHHHH such kindness, that is extremely sweet of you I am not worthy!!! I always worry about their characterisation so for you to say that is AMAZING and so incredibly reassuring!!! I am honoured that you would even read my story at all and so humbled that you wanted to send this ask, PLEASE DON’T BE SORRY!! I’m so happy omfg ;___;Also in response to you thinking my story is oberaffengeil I can only say -ABSOLUT KNORKE!!!! Ich grinse wie ein Honigkuchenpferd!!!!!!

[rachelisnotatwork]

Sweltering round the Fatherland

I did not leave Berlin willingly. In fact I complained constantly throughout the one final brunch I demanded. And on our way to the car rental place. And most of the drive down to Dresden. After nearly 5 weeks in our glorious Airbnb I felt like we probably had at least some light squatters’ rights.

It didn’t help that our apartment in Dresden was in what I’m sure an estate agent would describe as an “up and coming” area, i.e. a bit of a shit hole. It also managed, no matter what we did, to be hotter than the outside world and our host- clearly dubious about the continence of the guests, had covered the bed with extremely noisy plastic undersheets that heated the bedroom to essentially the equivalent of sleeping in a Finnish sauna. That plus a disappointing evening meal did nothing to discourage my belief that leaving Berlin was a mistake.

We had two days in Dresden and it’s surrounds. Because some of the museums are closed on Monday, we decided to use our Monday to go visit “Saxon Switzerland”. The name Saxon Switzerland sets the bar high and naturally it then disappoints because it’s more hilly than Alp-y. I would blame an over-zealous tourist board committee but apparently it was some homesick 18th century Swiss artists.

First off we visited a place called the Bastei bridge, which is a bridge built between giant rock formations. It is pretty beautiful although I feel someone without crushing vertigo could probably appreciate it more, especially since the top was also frequented by a man with an extremely badly behaved Alsatian, thus combining my fear of heights and dogs in one terrifying location.

Our next stop was more pleasant. We walked through the woods and then took a boat ride along the Obere Schleuse, which is a shallow river in a gorge between Germany and the Czech Republic. The boat was gondoliered by a guy who gave a little tour as he punted us slowly down the river. He had what I strongly suspect was a very thick local accent but Marcel thought there might be a chance he’d had a stroke. Either way it was fairly impenetrable to me, expect bizarrely a few minutes where he talked about lichen growth. So I guess that month at language school was really worth it?

The only downside of the trip was that the walk to the boat had been entirely down into the gorge and thus the walk home was entirely uphill. It was fairly steep and exhausting, and what wasn’t particularly reassuring was to find a gravestone half way up one of the steep climbs with a gravestone from the 19th century with a very specific time of death for a forester from something called a “Blutschlage” (literal translation: blood blow). So I guess I should be pleased we got out with just a few insect bites.

The next day we’d booked onto an English-language tour of Dresden. Almost everyone else was north of 75, which made us feel super young. And had also reached the complaining years. The ticket could be torn off to leave a free postcard of Dresden. One Australian woman then complained to the guide that it didn’t include a stamp and wouldn’t let it go.

The tour was pretty good though. The centre of Dresden is stunning as was mostly built by August the Strong, who really liked to party. My favourite fact from the tour was that he’d weigh guests before and after parties and those who hadn’t gained enough weight weren’t invited again because they were clearly no fun. He built a huge complex called the Zwinger for summer parties in addition to a huge palace for one of his mistresses (he had a lot) so he didn’t have to go far for the night.

The downside of touring Dresden is the crushing guilt you get to feel if you are British (or American) for brutally firebombing it. They have pretty much completed the reconstructions now but when you look at the before photos… well, it was no big surprise that both groups were some of the biggest contributors to the fund to rebuild the cathedral (the blacker stones are the only original ones).

After the tour finished we went up the cathedral for the view.

Then we went into the Mathematisch-Physikalischer Salon. This is largely a collection of clocks and super creepy automatons from the 18th century, so right up my street. Afterwards we had coffee and cake on a cafe on the roof and I went on what felt like an epic trip in the boiling sun to find a toilet somewhere I could use (doesn’t seem to be a legal requirement for cafes to have one here) and ended up begging a cleaning lady to use a museum one. Think Marcel thought I was pretty much dead by then, I was gone so long.

The next day we headed up North. Whilst our final destination was the island of Ruegen, we had a planned stop for the day at a place called Godnasee. This is a lake in the middle of nowhere, where we had a delightful afternoon swimming, sunbathing and reading. The nice thing about East Germany is it is full of lakes and is rapidly depopulating, so it is very easy to find an empty swimming spot.

We got to Ruegen in the evening, just in time for a quick walk before dinner. There were two national parks we wanted to visit in our two days and because the weather was due to be better at the one further away, we went to the Nationalpark Vorpommersche Boddenlandschaft the next day. The spot we picked  to go to was a lighthouse on a beach that was a 5km walk/cycle ride/horse and carriage ride away from the nearest car park. We decided to walk because of my lack of cycling aptitude and because legs are a lot cheaper than horse-drawn carriages (thanks to the endless slow tragedy of UK politics, the Euro to pound ratio could be best described as...sub-optimal for us).

This turned out to be a mistake. Apparently Marcel had showered in mosquito pheromones that morning or something so after a few minutes he was besieged by such a huge crowd of them that, whilst he was the main attraction, some of them by dint of sheer numbers bumped into me. This lead to less of a “walk” through the woods than a mad charge frantically waving our arms until we eventually reached the lighthouse. The beach there is quite pretty and in typical fashion, once you walk a short distance from the lighthouse, quite empty.

We took a route back through some wetlands to stay in the sunshine and hopefully avoid the mosquito plague- a successful plan. It also brought us across a cafe that served the only accommodation in the park (a caravan park) so stopped to eat the traditional hot sunny day beach food of...struedel.

On our way back we stopped in the city of Stralsund. It is a pretty little city that used to be a Hansa city (so lots of nice brick architecture), spent a long time being part of Sweden and is now the political seat of Angela Merkel. We had a nice wander around and came across a Simson pharmacy, so I felt quite at home.

The next day we headed out to explore Ruegen itself. Our first stop was a wander along the chalk cliffs there. Sort of surprised we found them and that they were decently high as driving around the island it had seemed as flat as a pancake. 

The previous day I had been messaging my friend Karo and mentioned I felt like I was the only British person for about a hundred miles and she directed me towards a place called Woody’s Little Britain, which is a British “emporium” featuring scones and cream tea in the middle of nowhere. Naturally we went. It was pretty boiling, which felt pretty unBritish and the cream was whipped not clotted (Debrett’s would be horrified) but the scones were pretty good.

Afterwards we headed to the beach. Ruegen has some huge long beaches, so we parked up and wandered through the woods to about 10km of pretty empty beach. Marcel went for a swim. I declined because the ocean was full of seaweed and also after Australia, I’m pretty convinced the sea is out to murder me. So I remained on the beach, which in the fashion of East German beaches was full of naked people and noted with amusement that the extremely elderly naked woman sitting a few metres down from us had cracked out a pair of binoculars to look down the beach. I initially just thought she was a shameless pervert, but apparently she was looking to see if her elderly nude swimming companion was coming down the beach (or at least I assumed that was what she was doing, because he did eventually turn up. We didn’t cover the vocab for that in language school).

The following day we headed West. Our first stop was the town of Wismar. Or more precisely a cafe within because we’d left without breakfast and then got stuck in traffic so were both hungry, overly-hot and grumpy on arrival.  We then wandered around the town. It is again, a pretty Hansa city, although this one we bombed a bit. We went up a rebuilt cathedral, which I did point out to Marcel that thanks to our bombing could be reconstructed with a lift right up to the tower in (you’re welcome guys!). It is still a port city which apparently brings logs from everywhere to turn into sawdust, or so the giant piles of logs and delicious smell of sawdust that wafts through the town suggests.

After that we went to Schwerin, which is also lovely and historic. It also has a famous castle which looks a bit gauche if you ask me, but Marcel just says looks German. 

We had a late lunch and then accidentally discovered some weird mooning monument with no explanation. A rather lengthily googling seems to suggest it is a scene from the life of the founder of this town, who got mooned by the folk of his home town when returning home for a visit because he’d directed all the trade that used to go to their town to Schwerin. I would have thought this was the kind of thing that merited a plaque as far lesser things have generated one, but apparently not.

We ended up having a subpar dinner in town and disappointed, both of us developed a craving for ice cream. This is apparently not something you can get in Schwerin after 9pm so we ended up driving to an out of town McDonald’s for late-night McFlurry’s and then I got all indignant that the lids weren’t hedgehog-friendly like we have in the UK, confirming to all the national stereotypes of weird British eccentrics who are overly sentimental about animals.

The following day we weren’t due in Luebeck, our next stop, until the evening and beautiful weather was forecast. So Marcel found us an amazing canoeing place to go. This was on the river Warnow and was a 15km trip down river through a nature reserve. The initial part of our trip was a little more exercise than I’d have liked as we happened to set off at the same time as a large school trip of teenagers. Not wanting to enjoy the beauty and solitude of a nature reserve with 30 shrieking teenagers, we decided to use our superior canoeing skills to put some distance between us and them. Annoyingly though either we are shitter at canoeing than we thought or they were perhaps a school canoe team as we had to paddle REALLY hard to keep any distance between us and them. And when we did create some distance, we managed to catch up with a family that had decided to enhance their trip to this protected nature reserve by mounting a boombox onto their canoe in order to play some incredibly loud techno. Thankfully they decided to pull over for a break before I could ram them and knock their stupid boombox into the water, and shortly after that Marcel wanted to take a side stream so we could “have a picnic at a castle”. This involved some very hard paddling upstream through a shady, stinky mosquito swamp that didn’t actually end in a castle but just in a village with the German word for castle in. Thankfully there was a field we could eat our picnic lunch in, and that placated my bad mood somewhat.

The advantage of this stop was that by the time we rejoined the river, pretty much no one was on it. We still had about 8km to go and this was the wilder, less-maintained stretch with lots of weaving around trees to be done. German prep for these sort of trips is also a lot more casual than English prep so a good few times we were left wondering where to go and which part of a rocky course was better to navigate. But it was beautiful, sunny, thousands of electric blue damselflies constantly flitted around us and there was a spot for a gorgeous (albeit cold) swim.

We finally got into Lubeck and our ancient house in the evening. We then had a great dinner at a place called Schlumacher’s, so that was a great day out. We fell into bed pretty exhausted, and then I nearly fell out again, because that is the problem with elderly houses with subsidence.

The next day we decided to go on a tour of Lubeck. Lubeck clearly doesn’t get a lot of English-speaking tourists as it only has a once-weekly tour in English and that did not happen to coincide with our stays. Completely disregarding my previous experience of near total incomprehension with a german tour, I merrily signed us up for one again. This went slightly better initially as our tour guide was old so spoke slowly and bellowed loudly, but it was boiling hot, I rapidly fatigued and the tour was two incredibly hot hours and by the end I was desperate for him to stop talking as by this stage I wasn’t really getting any of it and everyone kept laughing at jokes I couldn’t get. I ate a huge ice cream to recover from the experience.

Lubeck is an ancient Hansa city that is pretty much entirely a UNESCO world-heritage site for ancient buildings. However the original city was built on swampy ground with some eccentric choices (like a fortified gate that had 3m thick walls on one-side and 1m thick on the other, leading the heavier side sinking a lot faster). The whole town is full of extremely wonky buildings, which you are fairly surprised are still standing. On the outside you can see essentially ornamental pole ends that support the floors and hold the two sides of the buildings together.

In the afternoon, hot and having toured most of Luebeck (as it prides itself on being “the city of short distances”), we decided to retire to the swimming lake opposite our front door. There we wiled away an enjoyable afternoon swimming, sunbathing and eating hot chips with mayonnaise. Glorious.

My grandfather was born in Kiel and the next day we had a plan to drop in there on the way to our next airbnb in the countryside. We had briefly considered staying in Kiel before we discovered it was Kieler Woche, which is some sort of sailing festival shebang. So we decided to limit it to a day trip.

It was exceedingly hot and our trip to Kiel brought forth the following observations 1) sailing festivals are pretty dull if you are on shore and thus are mostly a series of kiosks 2) Kiel was apparently bombed to the ground in WW2 but unlike areas that went for a painstaking reconstruction, they went for the construction of multiple ugly shopping malls 3) I know it sounds like it is impossible but apparently the town has absolutely no shade in it and I had forgotten to put suncream on and get extremely grumpy when I’m too hot.

So all in all, I would not recommend Kiel and our trip there was brief. By the end of a hot sweaty couple of hours there we were both dying for somewhere to cool down and so googled the nearest beaches. We found a nearby beach called Heidkate and headed straight for there.

How nice the beaches are around there appears to be a pretty well-kept secret (perhaps real Germans know. Imitation Germans like Marcel do not). Miles and miles of white sand, grassy dunes and the clean, calm Baltic sea. We found a quiet spot, quickly changed into our swimwear and raced into the...well, Baltic water. It was cold, but in a lovely cold way, especially when you are hot. And lead to the strange dichotomy of having a boiling hot upper half that was sweltering in the sun, and a frosty cold lower half. The sea was so calm between the groynes (and shallow) that even with my sea-phobia I swam again and again, in between coming up to lie on the beach and warm up thoroughly. 

It was really tough to drag ourselves away...and we ended up leaving rather late (it stays very bright for a deceptively long time here so what we thought was about 5pm was actually 7pm) so we didn’t end up getting to our airbnb in the North Friesland (apparently Marcel says it is a byword for German hicks) until 9.30pm. It was still light though, so we hung out on our terrace and watched a huge number of bumblebees flitting between the wildflowers.

The next day we decided to visit both “seas”. First we headed to the North Sea. There are huge “sands” here called the Wattenmeer. Or at least that’s what I thought they were. What they actually are is enormous windswept mudflats. This is exactly as appealing as it sounds. It was also 7c colder than where we’d come from, so we hastily turned around and headed over to the Baltic side again.

We found ourselves a lovely stretch of sand near Flensburg from which you could pretty much spit on Denmark (should you so want; I quite like the Danes so didn’t). The sea was incredibly shallow and warm as we waded out over the white sandy sea bed. And then noticed we weren’t the only things who liked the warm and shallow water. There were hundreds and hundreds of moon jellyfish. These can’t sting people, but sharing the water with a huge number of dinner plate-sized jellyfish is just a bit...off-putting. I decided this would more be a reading on the beach afternoon than a swimming day.

The next morning we packed up and set off for Hamburg. Since our last couple of days were city days, we took the car to Hamburg airport, dropped it off in the lengthily car rental queue and took the S-Bahn into town. We checked into our hotel and went for lunch. Whilst waiting for our food, we got a call from Enterprise who were wondering where our car was. Because apparently we are sometimes great planners and book to drop our car off in the downtown area right by our hotel. It turns out though we are not great rememberers and were both convinced we had to drop it off at the airport. Somewhat mortifying. They did find the car eventually though.

Many, many years ago when I was at undergraduate, my friend had sent me a trailer for a place in Hamburg called Miniatur Wunderland as a piss-take. It showed a tiny model train world with dead prostitutes, red light districts and car accidents. I immediately was desperate to go. It took a long time to finally get there, but finally, finally it was time! Now you know when you hype something up massively, and then you go and it is actually a big disappointment? This was emphatically not one of those times! It was even better than I thought it was going to be. We spent three hours there and I could have easily spent longer watching tiny fire engines driving around putting out tiny fires and pressing buttons (there are so many buttons you can press to activate things- pro tip, visit in the late afternoon when all those 4 year olds that would normally be hogging them are having dinner).  It was amazing. And also huge. I mean tiny, but huge in that it covers nearly two floors of a big warehouse.

The following morning we went on a free walking tour of the city. One of the things Miniatur Wunderland has is a tiny version of Hamburg. Having seen all of the sights in miniature the day before, this lead to a rather disorientating case of Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, where I started to doubt what size they were, or I was. It is quite a pretty city though (on one side, on the other is about a million shipping containers and container ships). 

It has always been a big shipping centre so there are lots of historic shipping offices in there. Our guide took us inside one, nominally to see the interior décor but actually so we could ride in a Paternoster lift. These are the endlessly moving doorless lifts that are super dangerous, so everyone else got rid of them. Germans however are weirdly protective over them and refuse to let them decommission them. And whilst I appreciate they are super dangerous for kids, the elderly, anyone moving slowly etc, they are pretty cool to ride. Marcel and I agreed it was pretty much the highlight of our day (nerds4eva).

After that we climbed a tower for the views, then had some lunch. Marcel decided he wanted to do a boat tour of the canals. There weren’t any English language ones but I decided it would probably be okay with German (having again, learnt nothing from prior experience). This time though I was completely screwed because we got on the boat last of all and so were sitting at the back. Where the speakers were broken. So I couldn’t even hear him properly. Anyway, Marcel said he had terrible and monotonous delivery, so I probably didn’t miss much. And it was a nice sunny day to be pottering about on a boat.

After that we decided to go through the Elbe tunnel. This is a 108 year old beautifully tiled tunnel under the Elbe. It has a few additional bonuses in addition to that. 1) you can ride down in giant freight lifts for the occasional cars they let through and 2) It is really nice and cool down there. During a heatwave in a city with no air-con, it was quite hard to feign interest in getting out on the other side to see the view.

A couple of years ago Hamburg completed their new concert hall, the Elbphilharmonie. It was supposed to cost about 200 million euros and take 3 years to build. It overran by 7 years and the final cost was about 800 million euros. Had to admit to a slight schadenfreude in discovering we aren’t the only country that can’t organise a piss-up in a brewery when it comes to accurately and speedily building new projects. The concerts now sell out months in advance but you can get a free ticket to go inside it. So we did. Marcel was very excited as he discovered they have the world’s largest curved escalator. I was too because I imagined it might be curved in the way of a grand curved staircase in some Antebellum mansion. Actually it was just an hump-backed escalator. Underwhelming.

In the evening we decided to take full advantage of the fact our hotel was creepily empty despite being very nice (Marcel being blunt ended up asking why we were pretty much the only guests. They said it was because they’d newly opened, so I recommend getting in there for a stay before they fill up. Fraser Suites Hamburg) to use the sauna. I love saunas. However I normally only think of visiting them when it is cold out. It turns out if you’ve spent all day in a heatwave, it isn’t half as nice. Does mean if you wash your hair though it dries super fast, so less effort than a hair dryer.

Marcel knows me well so had booked a chocolate tour at Chocoversum for our final morning (softening the blow of leaving). I was keen because tours always involve free chocolate. But this was actually a really educational tour. You learnt all about the history of the plant, how to transport it in a cargo ship, how to roast and extract it, what all the machines are called and how they work, plus you get to make your own chocolate bar. So now if the apocalypse comes, I’m extremely prepared to restart civilisation/aka chocolate production.

After that Marcel wanted to walk around the Alster Lakes before our flight. It was pretty hot for walking but Marcel had picked a scenic restaurant quite far away. We got to there and it was a beautiful spot, on a pier so pretty much all of the tables had a lake view. To find it only took cash. And we were nowhere near an ATM and deliberately hadn’t got any more cash out because German ATMs charge you 5.99 to get cash out. So we turned back and found somewhere that would have been perfectly nice if we hadn’t just seen a better one.

And then, alas it was time to leave the Fatherland for the Motherland. It had been an amazing trip and we were pretty depressed to leave. But hey, London in summer is also full of endless sunny days...right?

[toobertsock]

This power of mine, one of my three wishes, to see timers above people's heads representative of their life span, has bothered me for a while.

I live in a rural area, not a whole lot of people, just neighbours and friends, to see. Most of the young people had long timers, denoting decades of time left. Others were tragically short, one sad young boy with less than ten years left to live. It was while I was looking at this boy that I thought of my second wish.

I rubbed the lamp and out popped the genie. The powerful magic within the genie causes it to take on a form that pleases the eye of any who look upon them. That's why my Genie, Jeanie, is quite the attractive, slim red head, simply wearing a sweater, knee length shorts, and flip flops.

"You ready for your second wish, my master?" She asks in her melodic voice. I nod, still looking at the boy hidden from sight. He's sitting on a bench, blissfully ignorant of his short life, observing the small corner of our local park. The clock above his head ticks down slowly.

"I wish for the ability to cure any disease, ailment, affliction, or virus. I wish for the limitless ability to heal." I tell her. She looks upon me with searching eyes. With a small, indulgent smile, she takes my hand in hers.

"Your noble wish, 2 of 3, within my power to grant to thee

Healing hands of peerless might to aid you with your deathly sight

I grant you this, master sublime

A wish of healing, to the end of time,"

A swirl of verdant energy surrounds us, laying into my hands, bringing with it a friendly warmth. I smile at Jeanie, her kind green eyes lit up with glee at her service.

"Go, great master mine, bring life and healing to the world. But be careful, a power such as this would be highly sought after. Many would do you harm to have it for themselves," she said with worry. I simply nodded, fixing my powerful glasses higher upon my nose.

"I know. I'll move to a city, see if I can earn my keep there. Hide a tree in a forest and all that," I said as I walked up to the boy. She faded from view, the worried frown on her face never disappearing as she watched me invisibly. I walked up to the boy, he seemed maybe twelve, observing what was likely his mother and sister playing on the playground. I sat next to him and held out my hand.

"Hey there kid, I'm Paul, what's your name?" He looks at me and smiles sadly. Seems he knows of his imminent demise after all.

"John," he says quietly. He takes my hand and immediately, the clock above his head shoots up.

'JESUS CHRIST, 116!' The years on his clock skyrocketed into the triple digits. The kid starts coughing, hacking wetly into his elbow. The coughing gets harder and harder, and eventually he falls to the ground.

"JOHN!" I hear a cry from across the park. The nother and sister are running towards us as I try to help John up onto the bench. He's coughing up flecks of blood, now.

"Do you know what's happening, ma'am?" I ask, eyeing the clock. The numbers are only ticking down in seconds, just like everyone else, so why was the kid hacking up blood? John starts throwing up the scarlet liquid.

"I-I-I don't know! He's never coughed up blood before!" She says, crying heavily over her son. The coughing eventually gets weaker, the puddle of blood under John tinted black. He seems shocked as he looks at the puddle, coughing weakly intermittently, less like someone had stabbed him in the neck and more like he was clearing his throat.

"Mom?" He asks. He seems scared. She looks at the sister, who herself is crying.

"Get in the car, Angela. We're taking John to the hospital. Your father will meet us there," she says as she attempts to lift John up. I assist her, beinf careful not to brush her hand in case something similar happens. We bring the boy to the car and load him into the back next to Angela, who fusses ober the exhausted boy.

"Thanks, mister...?" She trails off.

"Just Paul, ma'am. I hope John gets well soon." I say and beat a hasty retreat before the woman can say anything. I head home, and turn on the tv, hoping for some form of information about the kid sooner or later.

-------

Nothing shows up that day, but tomorrow holds a different story.

"Miracle in local hospital, 11 year old John Graines, having been diagnosed with Leukemia last year, makes a sudden startling recovery after an episode at the local park," a reporter on tv says. The camera pans over to John's family, all of whom have the biggest grins I've ever seen.

"He was coughing and puking up blood, I thought he might die. Then we get to the hospital, have him checked up in the ER, and what does the doctor say? 'I don't think I've ever seen a healthier set of lungs on anyone in my life!' My son's had Leukemia for almost a year, and suddenly he's cured? It must be an act of god!"

Jeanie scoffs at my side. I look at her and she just smiles back. Neither of us say anything and turn back to the tv, neither of us really watching anymore.

This was a promising outcome.

You are someone with really bad vision problems. Upon finding a genie’s lamp, one of the three wishes you make is to have “depth perception”. However, the genie misinterprets it as “death perception”. Now you must deal with your unusual and morbid powers.

[agneslovesart]

After A Shooting in his Barbershop, Troy Staton Envisions a Greater Mission

New Beginnings Barbershop and Luvs Art Project Fundraise and Focus on Positive Work and Community Engagement by Cara Ober “New Beginnings Barbershop appears like a Kerry James Marshall painting manifested in Baltimore,” wrote Angela N. Carroll in her essay “A Sanctuary for Art and Fellowship: Troy Staton and New Beginnings Barbershop,” published in Issue 04: […] from BmoreArt | Baltimore Contemporary Art

[xxiix3-blog]

California.

I remember at the naive age of 14, I visited California and knew right then and there that I would one day want to call it my home. Everything about it: the weather, the people, the atmosphere.. it just felt so perfect. I made it well known to my family that it was my place that I truly wanted to be, and as much as they knew that very well, they probably thought it was just a small little wish coming from an immature little teenager. But since that time I’ve continued to daydream about the future days I would come back. I daydreamed about being old enough to go there on a vacation with friends. I daydreamed about showing my future boyfriend, and hoping he would fall in love with it too. But I never would’ve thought that it would all come true one day... ♡

My feelings still haven’t changed. Instead, now that I’m older, they’ve only developed into a stronger, raging, urge to really make California my home. In between the 3 times I’ve visited California, I’ve tried to convince myself that I’ll just settle in Jersey, it’s easier, convenient, whatever. But since this recent vacation, I’ve made up my mind: 

California will be home one day.

No more daydreaming, hoping, wishing. It will. It’s just a matter of the next few years consisting of hard work and dedication. I’ve never felt like Jersey was my home. It may sound like I’m making that up, but, I mean it. I just never felt that homey vibe around here. But California is truly where my heart feels warm and complete, and I honestly truly believe I left it behind on this trip. 

"You'll never leave where you are, until you decide where you'd rather be." - Angela Brown Oberer

Everyone has dreams and goals. I’ve had my fair share of them, but this one? It’s taking the cake. California, I cannot wait to see you again and officially call you home. 

[digitalmark18-blog]

Matchbook Creative Adds Social Media Manager

New Post has been published on https://britishdigitalmarketingnews.com/matchbook-creative-adds-social-media-manager/

Matchbook Creative Adds Social Media Manager

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Hundreds of Girls Ignite STEM ‘Superpowers’

By Andy Ober Assistant Managing Editor

2018-09-10T17:47:50Z

More than 500 middle school girls and over 50 exhibitors got together today for an event Indianapolis Deputy Mayor Angela Smith Jones says can be “an igniter” for the next generation of STEM workers. The second annual “Ignite Your Superpower” STEM Day, which took place on the IUPUI campus, allowed students to take part in experiments ranging from chemical crystallization to building and coding droids. Greg Ballard, co-founder of Indy Women in Tech, says…

Source: http://www.insideindianabusiness.com/story/39060634/matchbook-creative-adds-ali-norman-as-social-media-manager

[bmoreart]

Escape Artists: The 2017 Sondheim Finalists in Review :: The 2017 Sondheim Finalists Reviewed by Angela N. Carroll, Bret McCabe, and Cara Ober

[brianrking]

Tweeted

The most precious resource for business people is not their time. It’s their energy. Manage it well.– Robin Sharma #SaturdaySuccess

— Angela Oberer (@AngelaOberer) January 13, 2019

[jamariyanews]

L’Italia “irrilevante” in Europa, qualunque governo si prospetti dopo il 4 Marzo

1 marzo 2018,

di  Luciano Lago Lo ha detto chiaramente Angela Merkel, in modo riservato ma deciso: “l’Italia è irrilevante, indipendentemente dal colore politico”, questa dichiarazione fatta dalla “tedescona” a Davos, nel corso di “un incontro ristretto” è stata registrata e riportata nel dettaglio da Mario Platero, storico corrispondente da New York per il Sole24ore, in un retroscena descritto per La Stampa. La dichiarazione della Merkel è stata fatta in occasione dei colloqui che preparano la probabile nomina di Jens Weidmann, alla guida della Bce in sostituzione di Mario Draghi, quando l’anno prossimo scadrà il suo mandato. Vedi: “Per Angela Merkel l’Italia è irrilevante…..” La dichiarazione sprezzante nei confronti dell’Italia, più che una denigrazione costituisce una constatazione del peso quasi nullo che l’Italia rappresenta nel contesto europeo ed atlantico per quello che riguarda le decisioni che contano. Fra queste decisioni possiamo considerare la nomina del nuovo presidente della BCE, come le altre direttive decise dalla Commissione Europea dove la parte decisoria è sempre e comunque rappresentata dalla Germania, che sia riferita alle normative sulle Banche o alle direttive sulle migrazioni, come anche le normative sul bilancio o sulle disposizioni relative all’agricoltura, al commercio, ecc… Secondo ‘Die Welt’, per la nomina dell’attuale capo della “Bundesbank” la Merkel ha già mosso le sue carte e risulta già definito un accordo con i socialdemocratici (e con portoghesi e spagnoli) per assicurare alla Merkel un uomo di sua fiducia. Non è l’Italia un paese che abbia voce in capitolo. D’altra parte se non hai peso politico non puoi trattare e non puoi incidere, sei l’ultima ruota del carro. Da quando l’Italia si trova vincolata nel sistema dell’euro, priva di una propria moneta, i governi si devono soltanto adeguare a quanto gli oligarchi della UE decidono su “suggerimento” della Germania che tutela i propri interessi a scapito degli altri soci della UE, come attesta il gigantesco surplus della bilancia dei pagamenti tedesca che registra circa 300 miliadi di dollari all’anno. Come dimostrato a suo tempo dalla vicenda del “Fondo Salva Stati” quando l’Italia ha contribuito, con decine di miliardi pubblici, a salvare le banche tedesche e francesi oberate dai crediti inesigibili. La Germania risucchia mella sua economia tutto quello che perde l’Italia in competività ed in buona parte anche in fuga dei cervelli e delle teconologie industriali più di nicchia che emigrano dal “bel paese” in fuga da burocrazia, imposte e vessazioni varie. Della debolezza italiana approfittano le grandi multinazionali per acquisire le aziende più importanti del Made in Italy ed in questi ultimi anni abbiamo assistito all’acquisizione di quasi 500 marchi nostrani finiti in mano straniera, in un saccheggio delle aziende e del patrimonio industriale italiano che non accennano a fermarsi. L’Italia è divenuta il Paese dello “shopping”: non tanto per i turisti che vengono a spendere nei nostri negozi ma alle aziende del ‘Made in Italy‘ che finiscono nelle mani di holding straniere, finendo per perdere la loro identità (e spesso anche i poli produttivi che traslocano all’estero). Vedi: Made in Italy addio…. Questo spiega il fatto che la Merkel consideri” ininfluente” il paese italia e la Germania seguita a trainare il carro della UE ben attenta che tutti i soci seguano il percorso stabilito. Sono i tedeschi che decidono il destino dell’Europa ed in particolare quello di una Italia divenuta “irrilevante” . Merkel con Renzi (“ce lo chiede l’Europa”)Tale è il risultato delle politiche succubi a Bruxelles ed a Berlino svolte dai vari governi ed in particolare da quello di Monti, di Letta, di Renzi e di Gentiloni, perdita di settori industriali strategici, perdita di aziende del Made in Italy e conseguente perdita di prestigio e di peso economico e politico. Un grazie particolare i cittadini italiani lo devono a quanti dicevano “ce lo chiede l’Europa” ed oggi cercano di mantenersi a galla nonostante tutto. Preso da: https://www.controinformazione.info/litalia-irrilevante-in-europa-qualunque-governo-si-prospetti-dopo-il-4-marzo/

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[nofomoartworld]

Art F City: Monday Links: Cindy Cheng Wins Sondheim Prize, “Art Barbie” Fails to Win Art Battle L.A.

Frida Davidsson, winner of Art Battle Los Angeles. Image via @fridadavidssonart Instagram, [h/t artnet News]

There’s now a booming outlet for fanfic, including stories “portraying a near future where the Trump administration has criminalized selfies, radicalizing Kim Kardashian as a freedom fighter for women’s rights.” The Toronto startup Wattpad has moved the online subculture closer to the mainstream publishing world, and former AFC editor Rea McNamara has written a fascinating profile on the subculture and its transition. [NOW]

Designer Raul Lopez has deconstructed the uniforms of corporate America into genderless cubist forms and they’re amazing. [Vogue]

The Broad’s upcoming exhibition Yayoi Kusama: Infinity Mirrors is expected to be a huge blockbuster when it opens on October 21. The museum announced yesterday that they’ll be pre-selling all 50,000 tickets for the show online on September 1st at noon. I’d be worried about servers crashing from that volume of traffic. [Los Angeles Times]

In other L.A. news, Art Battle just took place in the Arts District and it sounds like it was terrible. It’s a live painting competition, which involved lots of paintings of pop culture things, dollar signs, hearts, and someone named “Art Barbie”. [artnet News]

Wow. Add this to the bucket list: the late French sculptor Niki de Saint Phalle left behind a 14 acre sculpture park in Tuscany inspired by Gaudi’s Park Güell. Her “Tarot Garden” is populated by giant goddess figures and a feminist takes on the tarot deck. This looks really cool. [Artsy]

Hong Kong high school students just set a world record for a display of 1,214 3D-printed sculptures of buildings from the city’s skyline. It kinda looks like a Won Ju Lim installation! (The 3D printing marathon was organized to celebrate the anniversary of Hong Kong’s return to mainland Chinese rule… which has been a less than great thing so far for the city’s pro-democracy activists, but that’s another story).  [South China Morning Post]

Congrats to Cindy Cheng, winner of the 2017 Sondheim Prize of $25,000. (As a curator, I’ve worked with Cheng before and can vouch that she totally deserves it!) Here, Angela N. Carroll, Bret McCabe, and Cara Ober discuss all the finalists. [BmoreArt]

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[mredwinsmith]

AcrylicsWorks 5 Competition Winners Announced

Congratulations to the 110 artists selected for North Light Books’ 2017 acrylics competition AcrylicWorks 5: Bold Values! If you see your name below, please check your email for instructions on next steps. You will receive an email from us with the subject line “AcrylicWorks 5 Winner Notification.”

    First Name Last Name Title Côtyne Martine Côté A mother Nature’s succession (Une relève pour dame nature) Christine Alfery Falling Waters Christine Alfery The General Sherman Tree – Sequoia National Park Cher Anderson Fancy Feathers Scott Anthony Sonoma Coast Bloom Scott Anthony Tomales Barn Angela Bandurka Pouring Peppermint Chantel Barber Rising Above RICHARD BELANGER The Observer Gabhan Berry Looking Back BIJAY BISWAAL GREY RAINBOW Darien Bogart Keep Moving Forward Henry Bosak Fleeting Beauty Kim Brandon-Watson Bogie-Jumping(tryptic) Susan Brandsema Wednesday Morning William Brody Blue Sunday David Caesar Sharleen – Arctic World Construction Scene #3 Laara Cassells “Jessica Ford and Lucrezia Panciatichi (after Agnolo Bronzino)” Paul Chapman The Nature of Light: Ice Blue JACYNTHE COMEAU Remnants Jean Cormier The Gillie Ray-Mel Cornelius Fourplex Laura Crabtree Hollenbeck Gene: Portrait of an Artist Ron Craig Ron_Craig_Shop 11 Shipfitters Lynne Cunningham City Looks Pretty to Me Elaine Daily-Birnbaum To the Very Edge shi dong Nostalgia Edward DuRose Crossing the Bitterroot Edward DuRose Teton Sunset Nancy Eckels Autumn Whirl Pamela Edevold Emeralds Pamela Edevold Heart In His Hands Marney-Rose Edge Unknown wayne edwards Sunrise, Coles Beach Tasmania Shannon Fannin 1959 Cadillac El Dorado Debilynn Fendley Ghost Rider Ellen Fuller Wood 1 Lynn Garwood Leaving Lynn Garwood The Magic Shell Shelley Gentry Windows to the Soul – Chimpanzee Nancy Haley You Go Girl Ray Hassard Morning after the Snowstorm Jennifer Heine Steves’ Den Kenneth Hershenson Jack of Diamonds Kathy Hildebrandt More Reasons I Was Tardy Randy Honerlah Emergence Peggie Hunnicutt Kitchen Table Dalliance Michelle Iglesias Tight Rope Walker John Jaster Lady in the Mask Jean Sbarra Jones Orange dress, beach, rocks Jean Kalin Innocence Valentin Katrandzhiev Caressed by the Sun Kitty Kelly Iris – Messenger of the Gods Kitty Kelly Teacher’s Pet Diane Kline 24 Karate Gold Bob Kling “Early Morning Floral Leaves” Bob Kling A Pasture Landing Katie Koenig Baseball and Peanuts Aili Kurtis Effervescence Deborah Leonard Crystal Blue Persuasion TaiMeng Lim Blessed Presence Ober-Rae Starr Livingstone Speaking Softly Diana Madaras Girl on the Couch Marissa Madonna Hair Piece Yael Maimon Storm Angela Martinez Maze of Straws Jim Martinez Utility Pole Darice Machel McGuire Honu At Rest Catherine McMillan Nassau Street Vickie McMillan Nose to the Ground Vickie McMillan Rivalry Thomas Mewborn Cloud Clipper 1 Lilianne Milgrom Le Rouge et le Noir Thyra Moore A Posh Event Andrew Morrison Chinatown Kaleidoscope Andrew Morrison Soirée alla Prima Timothy Mulligan Sacramento River #3 Timothy Mulligan West Coast Pier Geoff Musseau Yes Buoy Mike Nagatani A grand downtown Mari O’BRIEN “Flame Dancer” Kari OConnell Between Two Worlds Sandrine Pelissier Slice of Life- Sisters Bob Petillo Sedona Anne Peyton Stepping Out Anne Peyton The Boys Tony Podue Philippe’s BRENDA POLLREISZ MORNING PATROL BRENDA POLLREISZ SILENT WATCH Nancy Polsky Japanese Alley Tricia Poulos Leonard Discovering a Hole in the Universe Christina Ramos The Critic Christina Ramos The Lookout Scott Ramsay Mellow Yellow #1 Kathryn Repas Nora April Rimpo Lanterns April Rimpo Movement Linda Rossin Big Sky Country Linda Rossin Spring Celebration John Schaeffer Ruby Veronica Schmitt Bike Squad Fred Schollmeyer Frozen Ford Fairlane Dan Simoneau Who’s Next (#whosnext) Jerry Smith Harbor Alliance Carol Staub Desert Plateau Robert Stebleton Florida Gators Peggy Steffens Driving Desire Robert Sweeny las ventanas de san miguel #2 Robert Sweeny oaxaca series #5 Jessica Tookey Be Free Lorraine Ulen Storm Watch Randy Van Dyck Bird Watch Michael Wagner Bill Pat Wagner Distant Gaze Michael Wagner Floppy Hat Marty Walker Alliance Bakery Jingyi Wang Artificial nature Henry Washington All About Line Akiko Watanabe Golden Light Lynn Welker Beneath Iron Mountain David Wicks Blues and Boats Steve Wilda Final Catch Robert Winfree Family of Musk Ox Dale Wolf Evening Snowfall in England Yelena York Butterfly Effect Marsha Zavez Blue Moon Katia Zhukova Frances (PORTRAIT SERIES #5)

  The post AcrylicsWorks 5 Competition Winners Announced appeared first on Artist's Network.

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[doctormyheartbelongstoyou]

Jonathan

„Ich bin seit 3 zu Hause, hab geschlafen und mich hierher bewegt. Außerdem hab ich keine Verwandten in Seattle und es ist Weihnachten. Das spricht gegen den Normalfall. Und bild dir bloß nichts drauf ein.“, die ersten paar Sätze kamen ein bisschen emotionslos über seine Lippen, ehe er bei seinen letzten Worten innehielt und sie verschmitzt grinsend ansah. Dabei zog er den Drehstuhl zurück, damit er sich setzen konnte. Im Beutel lag noch das herkömmliche Plastikbesteck, aber in einer Schublade im Schreibtisch lagen auch ein paar Messer, Gabeln und Löffel, die vom Reinigungspersonal immerzu ausgetauscht wurden. Im Grunde lag überall in diesem Büro etwas rum. John  war meistens zu faul um in die Kantine zu gehen, weil ihn die Arbeit manchmal derartig vom Essen abbringen würde, wenn er nicht hier aß. Die obere Lasche der Box musste lediglich zurückgedrückt werden, ehe sich der Deckel öffnen ließ und den Duft von gebratenen Nudeln mit Ente verströmte. Eine fischartige Tube mit Sojasauce lag auch noch im Beutel, außerdem ein bisschen Chili in einer Verpackung, in der man sonst Ketchup erwartete. „Wie geht’s Angela? Sie ist jetzt auf der Liste. Aber was weiß ich, wie schnell sie vorrückt.“, brummte er nachdenklich. Am liebsten sollte alles Schlag auf Schlag passieren, damit der Fall ad acta gelegt und positiv  verdrängt werden konnte. Sein Blick begegnete ihrem und wartete kurz auf eine Antwort, ehe sein Blick über ihre Unterlagen schweifte, die sie sorgsam zusammengeschoben und beiseite gelegt hatte. Im Plastikbeutel befanden sich auch noch zwei Dosen Bier. Die eine öffnete er jetzt, wartete kurz das Zischen ab um sicherzustellen, dass der Inhalt sich nicht direkt überall verteilen würde und trank dann einen langen Zug.

[agneslovesart]

Escape Artists: The 2017 Sondheim Finalists in Review

The 2017 Sondheim Finalists Reviewed by Angela N. Carroll, Bret McCabe, and Cara Ober This year’s Sondheim Finalist Exhibition is haunted by an odd and eerie spectre: the 1980s in all its optimistic, commercial, and self-involved glory. Of the seven Baltimore-based finalists, only a few can personally remember the ’80s, and it is this sense of […] from BmoreArt | Baltimore Contemporary Art

[thedeborahdavis-blog]

01-28 German Chancellor Angela Merkel (L) bends ober to the daughter Marie of new Foreign Minister Sigmar Gabriel (2ndR) as his wife Anke (R) and German President Joachim Gauck (2ndL) watch on ... http://dlvr.it/NDV3Q8