#And workplaces don't often encourage you to say 'but here's who can'

[grandmagbignaturals]

I dont normally say this but shout out to the guy from winz who called me back today about a question i had and said "do you want a straight answer"

And when I said oh yes please

Told me the answer to my question, the plans for the future of the question, and name dropped a charity that could help me instead.

I do not remember your name but thank you for giving a fuck my friend.

[ylangelegy]

kaeeeee loml what if i asked u for jeonghan + what? me? jealous? never.

ⵌ lawyer!jeonghan x lawyer!reader. ⵌ word count: 1.1k ⵌ notes: alternate universe: office. hi, my light! do you remember saying "workplace rival yoon jeonghan that has the same academic validation kink as you"? because i do 😃 and here's a taste of it!

The firm's war room is alive with energy.

The partners are gathered, a sea of pinstriped authority, waiting to devour the presentations. You sit near the end of the long table, fiddling with the corner of your folder, pretending not to notice Yoon Jeonghan lounging next to you like he owns the place.

He doesn't, of course. Not yet. But the way he leans back in his chair, perfectly pressed suit catching the overhead light, gives off the impression that he thinks it's only a matter of time.

No matter how many late nights you put in, how thoroughly you prepped for cases, Jeonghan always seemed to glide in a hair's breadth ahead of you. Case won? Jeonghan had also just triumphed with an even bigger client. Article published? His had gone live the same day in a journal with more prestige.

It wasn't enough to be good. He always had to be better than you specifically, and he didn't even try to hide it. It's a game of chess that Jeonghan wins more often than not, much to your sheer annoyance.

"You look nervous," he drawls as one of the interns goes to set up the projector. His voice is low enough that only you hear.

"I'm not," you reply in a harsh whisper.

Jeonghan smirks, brushing imaginary lint off his sleeve. "Good. I'd hate for you to trip up before I get the chance to one-up you."

"Keep dreaming."

The partners call for the first presenter, and Jeonghan is on his feet in a single fluid motion. He glances down at you, a flicker of amusement in his eyes.

"Watch and learn," he murmurs before strolling to the front of the room.

You hate how good he looks up there. Hate how effortlessly he commands attention, his voice smooth and confident as he outlines his wins from the last quarter. He's all charisma and sharp angles, throwing in just enough technical jargon to prove he's more than a pretty face.

And the worst part? The partners eat it up.

When he finishes, the room breaks into polite applause. Jeonghan returns to his seat, pausing beside you. "Your turn," he says with mock encouragement.

You rise, spine straight, and walk to the front of the room. The folder in your hand feels heavier than it should, but you don't let it show. Your voice is steady as you present, every word precise, every statistic delivered with razor-sharp clarity. You see the partners nodding, their eyes fixed on you, and for a moment, it feels like victory is within reach.

Then you glance at Jeonghan.

He's watching you, his chin resting on his hand, a small, unreadable smile playing on his lips. It's distracting enough to make you stumble over your next sentence— not enough for anyone else to notice, but you know that he does. You know that he's going to give you grief over it, too.

When you finish, the partners offer their feedback, but their words blur together. You return to your seat, hyper-aware of Jeonghan beside you.

He leans closer, his cologne faint but maddeningly present. It's a scent you wouldn't expect on a man as cutthroat as Jeonghan: Something fresh and soothing, with notes of cedant and clementine. Who knew that your rival was into more floral fragrances?

"Tripped up a bit there," he teases lowly. "Losing your edge, darling?"

You don't dignify his taunt with a response. You keep your eyes fixed on the partners in front of you two, knowing that nothing would vex Jeonghan more than being ignored.

Sure enough, you can hear the derisive snort that he lets out when you don't even look his way. His chair squeaks as he leans back, leaving you alone for the time being. A corner of your lip twitches upward. Checkmate.

The meeting goes on without much fanfare. The partners promise results in a day or two, which typically means dole outs of the best clients and cases. The real reward, though, are the whispers.

The grumblings about who might be the next partner. Which associate— between Jeonghan and you— might someday ascend.

As people begin to file out of the war room, a couple of people go up to congratulate the two of you. It's a well-practiced charade, how both of you offer tight-lipped smiles and curt nods in response. It's a shark-infested field; you and Jeonghan know that no one can be trusted.

But then one of the partners— Atty. Sy, perhaps the most senior person in the room— ambles towards the two of you.

Your breath hitches in your throat. Jeonghan squares his shoulders.

Atty. Sy pauses. And then—

"Good," he says simply, his eyes trained on you.

It's just one word, barely praise, but it feels like a win handed on a silver platter. You fold into a bow, partly because it's the polite thing to do, and partly because you're trying to hide the shit-eating grin threatening to take over your face.

"Thank you, sir," you answer.

Atty. Sy doesn't say anything to Jeonghan. That's an entirely different win in itself, one that you revel in as you straighten back to your full height.

Jeonghan's expression is perfectly neutral, but you've worked with him for long enough to know the telltale signs of him fraying at the edges. The muscle jumping in his jaw. The murderous flare in his gaze. It's how he looks like when he's facing a particularly difficult client in court, when he's raring for a fight.

God, you wish you could take a picture. It would be so nice to frame this moment in time, to have a tangible reminder of how you one-upped the man, the myth, the legend when it truly mattered.

Jeonghan catches the hint of a smirk on your face.

"I'm not jealous," he says immediately, defensively.

You raise your eyebrows inquisitively. It's an almost innocent look, as if you're wordlessly communicating I haven't said anything.

Jeonghan barrels on, his nerves— for once— getting the better of him. "What? Me, jealous? Never!" he huffs, his hands shoving roughly into his slacks.

"Okay," you sing-song, turning on your heel.

"Yah, you—!"

You don't bother to see what else he has to say. You're already leaving the room, humming happily to yourself.

Jeonghan stays behind, his hands clenched into fists in his pockets; his teeth, grinding so hard that they might cause real damage if he isn't careful. Despite himself, his eyes stray just a couple of inches down your retreating back. To the way your hips sway as you leave, your pencil skirt riding up ever so slightly—

"Damn it," Jeonghan cusses, one hand running through his face in frustration.

Checkmate, indeed.

୨ৎ * GAME, SET, PLAY ! ( JEALOUSY ) DRABBLE GAME.

[grison-in-space]

Hi! Just wanted to say, re:veganism discourse: Excellent Opinions, Great Delivery, Immaculate Vibes 👍 have a great day :)

cheers, ty! it is honestly sort of surprising to me that folks are reading along--as I said to someone else in DMs, I kind of figured that response was mostly something I was putting together in my own head, so I'm pleasantly surprised it's resonating with other people.

I am also just. :| not thrilled to have to be typing up all these "and here's how caring about animal welfare can radicalize you down all these shitty pathways if you add X and Y and Z" because at the end of the day I do think all species are worthy of basic respect; at the end of the day I do think there's nothing fundamentally better about me as a human than any other species. At the end of the day it actually matters a lot to me that my research mice are kept with as much enrichment as I can give them and that their lives and bodies and effort are honored and used wisely. It matters to me that the dogs I teach and the people I teach to train their dogs are learning with minimum stress and maximal confidence. These are all really important planks of my personal code of ethics!

It sucks to feel like I need to sit down and enumerate all the reasons that I think this other perspective of people who start in the same place I do--animals are neat individuals who encompass both the alien and the familiar, which share our lives in a multitude of ways--has developed in such a way that I think it encourages a really toxic way of relating both to animals and ourselves. In general I prefer to focus on places where I can agree with other folks, even if their opinions are different from mine. Someone in the notes brought up "struggle sessions," which are kind of the epitome of toxicity within the left: good values and a desire to help one another get so channeled through perfectionism and backbiting that you wind up with people gathering to literally torture and destroy each other. (Not just in China, either; it keeps happening, cf. Synanon in the US and the dissolution of the Japanese United Red Army.) That's not the kind of way I want to interact with people I'm supposed to be working together with.

So I try not to do that shit too much. I think about the places where people who have values just like mine go down rabbit holes and wind up in bad places, and I try and build barriers so I don't get burned out and angry and dissolve in a puff of flame. (I'm not directly engaging further with this anon for that reason, actually.) But just--aaaaaaaaauuuughhh, ARAs really irritate me because I can see where the roots are, and yet the entire ideology means that there essentially can't be listening. You can see that in the way I'm sitting here going "No, I know what your ideas are, here's why I have rejected them," and still I am getting exhortations to just listen and understand about ARA ideology. No. I did that, the last time there were protests about it in my workplace I went ahead and read the actual detailed IACUC reports released by FOIA that the protestors were shouting about, and bluntly it was a) not convincing and b) exactly the same appeals to emotional knee-jerk reactions and emotional flooding that I decried yesterday. Twenty years I have been checking my responses to these people, and it's never anything different.

I don't think that removing emotion totally from ethics and morals is wise or even possible--we use emotion for decisionmaking and encoding our values, after all, a person without emotion literally cannot decide things--but I do not like or tolerate subcultures that won't leave space to sit, think, and let the first knee-jerk rush of gut response die down. Sometimes, often, I do decide that my gut reaction is right! But I need the space to sit the fuck down and think about it, and if you take that to an ARA space you will mostly get flooded with more emotionally reactive imagery until you agree or leave. And that is coercive.

[mllemaenad]

Right, well, I wanted to write, so I'm going to do that, even if my wrists hurt. Things I will pay for later, but make me feel better now.

Have now listened to episodes 1 and 2 of The Magnus Protocol.

My first impression is that this is much worse than what was going on in The Magnus Archives.

The Magnus Institute was a private institution with no obvious access to other people's information (Magnus's occasional psychic spying notwithstanding). Most information it received seems to have at least been given willingly. There are a handful of instances of John forcing people to talk, yes, but not so many that I am constantly concerned for the privacy of London's citizens. Gertrude is said to have disliked compelling people to talk (Family Business), so while her tally very likely exceeds John's purely due to the length of time she was in the job, it's still probably not very high. It's impossible to account for the behaviour of previous archivists of course but, well, the whole place is set up to entice people in to tell their tales. I would hazard that most of the materiel in the archives was volunteered.

Even in cases where someone was forced – at least they knew about it, because they were there. The lady in Scrutiny who was so deeply disturbed by John's behaviour was also able to make that behaviour stop just by rolling up to The Magnus Institute and reporting it – which is a reasonably straightforward outcome, given the general weirdness of their world.

I don't mean to say that The Magnus Institute didn't do harm – it very obviously did. But even in terms of its final apocalypse, we're looking at a horror that lasted mere months (assuming a passage of time that broadly corresponds to the broadcasting schedule) before a group of disgruntled employees (and Georgie) burned the nightmare tower down, stabbed Magnus and reset reality. There were limitations to The Magnus Institute's reach, and Jonah Magnus's personal ambitions concluded with an utter, embarrassing flop by any reasonable estimation.

Here, though, you're looking at a government department with truly concerning access to people's data. The forum-based statement in First Shift is perhaps not too awful (forum threads can often be read by anyone, even if actually posting requires an account), but the earlier piece regarding the bereaved woman was a private email thread, and the story in Making Adjustments is drawn from a recording of a woman's session with her therapist. Sam calls out the massive invasion of privacy this sort of thing entails, but is shut down on the grounds that it's fine because they "work for the government".

Alice Ok, so looks like it's an email. Sam And I just… read it? Is that even legal? Alice Probably. We do work for the government. Sort of. Sam What about GDPR? Alice Look, Sam, I don't know what to tell you. This is the job. I've been doing it for years and there's never been any problems. Maybe ask Lena? She’d probably know. – The Magnus Protocol: First Shift

While it is too early to definitively establish the worldbuilding rules here:

In The Magnus Archives, giving a statement was functionally feeding an eldritch power

Gertrude Robinson took statements, but kept the archives themselves in a state of disarray, to impede Magnus's plans (Dwelling)

Much of The Magnus Archives played on the difference between knowing a thing and understanding it

The characters in The Magnus Protocol are not just collecting, but blindly categorising statements – they are organising them by keyword, but not encouraged to analyse what they see or hear – Alice notes that they are paid not to care (Making Adjustments)

At least in The Magnus Archives, making a statement tended to come with consequences: typically horrifying recurring nightmares

So you have to wonder – what consequences will there be for these people, who have had their stories stolen from them?

In terms of workplace horror, this is very much coming at it from the opposite direction. The Magnus Archives was about the horrible job you couldn't quit. Most people find themselves stuck in these for economic reasons rather than supernatural ones, although in fairness both Martin (Children of the Night) and Melanie (Dig) are explicitly called out as very much needing the work, but the characters are nevertheless stuck and constantly call back to the fact that they would absolutely quit – if only they could.

It ran on punishing hours and constant exhaustion, the expectation that you would take on tasks you were in no way qualified or trained for (this started with "archiving" and escalated quickly to "apocalypses"), the boss who expected you to "just know" things you couldn't possibly know at all, and a soul destroying amount of responsibility with little hope of advancement. The same person ran the institute since its founding, literally consuming his employees along the way, and if you wanted, say, to be Head Archivist, you were very much stuck waiting for the current occupant of the role to die.

It is significant that, with the noted exception of Eric Delano, all of Gertrude's assistants died on the job (some of them by her hand), and tallying John's assistants is a bit like listing off the wives of Henry VIII: dead, dead, dead, divorced, survived, status unknown. While the story leans on deaths for drama, it gets a lot of mileage out of using historical data, so characters stick around. It's weird for them to be actually gone.

The Magnus Protocol opens with Teddy quitting the OIAR to take a job in insurance. The very first thing you learn about this place is that people leave, and this idea is reinforced a number of times even in the first two episodes: Gwen is pressured to resign by Lena because she is "difficult", and Lena notes outright that, for most people, this job is strictly short term:

Lena Hmmm. I’ve always known you thought you were slumming it down here, but I never actually considered you might think of this as the first step of a career. Most people simply move on within 12 months or so. Gwen I’m not most people. – The Magnus Protocol: First Shift

Moreover, Making Adjustments concludes first with a fraught conversation about possible redundancies and then with Alice accusing Sam (however playfully) of looking to "jump ship" when he's seen researching The Magnus Institute.

This is the horrible job you might lose tomorrow. While the threat in The Magnus Archives was that you were probably going to die in this job, here it leans more toward – if you didn't show up tomorrow, who would question it? People leave.

It is a night shift, for no clear reason – they're doing data entry on what definitely looks like non-essential information so why the hell can't they do that in the day? Employees are not encouraged to think about their work, and Gwen is criticised for favouring accuracy over speed. It is grimly impersonal, and what little solidarity there is appears to be hard won; it's noted, for instance, that Colin is really only social with Alice, and Alice seems committed to team camaraderie.

But above that is the sense that the employees are considered too insignificant to participate in what is really happening here. I mean, among other things, Colin seems to be having a wildly different workplace experience to everyone else.

Alice postulates that they are a fossilised department – one that only really exists because it's been forgotten – although even she notes that the theory only works if you don't poke at it too hard:

Sam I've no real idea what the OIAR even is. Alice You and everyone else. I’ve checked and there's not really much info on it. My current working theory is that maybe it got set up in the 70s, back when everyone was off their tits on LSD and giving ghost-hunters massive grants to wave crystals in graveyards. I reckon at some point they must have put together a small government department to, like, oversee the spending and monitor this stuff and no-one's noticed it's still going. Sam Makes sense. Alice As long as you don’t pay too much attention. – The Magnus Protocol: First Shift

Even if that is a bit extreme, the general consensus is that their work goes nowhere and does nothing. Which fits broadly with the general lack of action and urgency in the department ... unless you happen to be Colin.

Alice Colin! There’s my guy! How's it hanging? Is it an app yet? Do we have a minimalist logo? I assume you’ve finished all the social features? Colin Don't you start. I swear I'm going to shove a cable down that prick's throat, pull it out his ministerial anus and floss him to death. ... Teddy Colin, mate, you know you’re never getting out of here. Colin Christ, don’t say that. Teddy Even if his nibs lets you off the hook, which he won’t, you couldn’t bring yourself to just leave. Not 'til you’ve figured out all these fun little errors. Colin Or they finally kill me. ... Colin I already have to explain to some chinless inbred politician that we’re running on something as old as the goddamn Atari Falcon, now I’ve got some green little smartarse giving me lip for it too? Well you can take your funny little lines and shove them up – – The Magnus Protocol: First Shift

Colin, specifically, is suffering from ministerial oversight. A lot of it, apparently. Departments that only continue to exist because they've been forgotten don't typically have the responsible minister leaning on the IT manager. Not even on the boss – the IT guy. It's interesting because his specific level of stress and frustration seems more consistent with what was going on in The Magnus Archives than here.

And then, of course, there are the stories themselves. It's impossible not to note that the text-to-speech programs sound an awful lot like the protagonists of the previous series. Presumably this is plot relevant, or else it's a really distracting choice. It's impossible to state at this stage whether that means it actually is them or not, but assuming for the moment that it is (because it is not interesting to discuss other possibilities until they become interesting) then what they have to say seems noteworthy.

They are presumably reacting to Sam specifically (welcome to the cursed protagonist club, new guy!), possibly to the box he ticked during onboarding, and likely to whatever past trauma led him to this job in the first place. And both seem to be issuing a warning.

Norris/Martin tells a story that Gwen classifies as "reanimation", but I admit I'm not sure I agree. The thing sounds like an iteration of the Anglerfish monster.

Norris/Harriet Winstead “Arthur? Is that you?” And that voice I have loved for twenty years answered: “Some of him.” – The Magnus Protocol: First Shift

Archivist Are you the same Sarah Baldwin that disappeared in Edinburgh in August 2006? Sarah Some of her. Skin. A few memories. Not on the inside. – The Magnus Archives: Return to Sender

That feels at least in part like an Easter egg – no newcomer is going to recognise the Anglerfish – but it is the crossing of the boundary: this is the first true story they heard, and proof that there is something very wrong with the world. And presumably the themes of grief and loss that pervade the story would relate pretty strongly to Martin's whole ... situation. I'm assuming nobody here chose to be a text-to-speech program.

Chester/John, meanwhile, issues a fairly stern warning about The Magnus Institute. The canary in the coal mine is a bit on-the-nose as a metaphor, sure, but if I were trying to explain to someone what was wrong with that place, I would likely also be blunt. The rough thing, though, is that quite explicitly no one heeds the warning: while the "removed" image is not described it pretty clearly illustrated RedCanary's fate. It's not just that the canary died down the mine. It's that it died in vain, because no one understood what killed it. And of course, it does pique Sam's interest to the point that he starts digging in to what happened. I'm disinclined to believe that curiosity is bad in these stories – if anything, John's issue was that he could never find out the things he needed to know fast enough to make a good decision. But there is a point there ... if you start looking into things, you have to be prepared to deal with them.

The third one, in Making Adjustments seems to be playing somewhat on The Picture of Dorian Gray: Sam and Gwen start the episode by doing practice runs on classification using classic horror, and the story, when it begins, draws on that confusion between art and subject. You can line Dorian up beside Dracula and Frankenstein any day. But the bigger point seems to be that the catalyst for this happened on camera:

Daria Before I could reply they hit a button on their set-up and suddenly we were live streaming with lights in my eyes and their arm tight around my shoulders. I don’t remember much of what they said to their viewers, but they kept telling everyone how lucky I was whilst they dragged me into the chair. – The Magnus Protocol: Making Adjustments

There are nested violations in this story: Daria expected a photo shoot, but at no point agreed to be tattooed on camera. Beyond that, the story she told in private to her therapist is now being recorded and catalogued by the OIAR. And whatever happened to Daria, this "Ink5oul" person seems to have profited by it, and by things like it.

I must admit, I'm not much of a "what entity is this" person, because as far as I could tell the general consensus on that in general fell between "that's arbitrary" and "all of them, probably, if only by their conspicuous absence". That sort of thing is very useful when talking about the people and their particular obsessions – if Simon Fairchild turned up, for example, you knew exactly what sort of aggravating bullshit you were in for – but worrying too much about the exact nature of a supernatural manifestation rarely leads anywhere useful.

I am more interested in the broader implications of how the story is told. In The Magnus Archives, the characters read the stories aloud – and usually adopted the persona, and sometimes even the accent – of the original statement giver. That had supernatural implications, of course, but also played into the broader themes of the story: John is very much invested in the individuals. The tragedy of Jane Prentiss, the mystery of Gertrude Robinson – these are his obsessions. Pretty much the only point he scores in his conversation with Leitner (The Librarian) is being able to instantly spot a passing reference to Gerard Keay: John is crap at the cosmology, but he's been paying attention to the people. Many of the recurring characters are very dead by the time the story starts, but they are kept alive in the narrative because the living characters step into their shoes, and care about what they did and what became of them.

Here, though, there is built in distance between the active protagonists and the individual horror stories. They largely don't even read them – Alice says she "skim(s) the case for keywords" (Making Adjustments) and otherwise tries to ignore what is happening. When a story is read aloud it is done by the text-to-speech programs, and they, as John and Martin did, adopt the personas of the authors in a way that sounds much more fluid than software from the 90s should be capable of. When the story comes straight from the source, it is not told to Sam or Alice or Gwen, but to someone else entirely. There is a reason for the audience to connect with the stories – from that external perspective you're getting pretty much the same thing you did in The Magnus Archives – but the actual characters have no reason to connect, or even to truly listen or empathise with what they're hearing, and doing so is regarded as a mistake.

Which makes you wonder – what might you miss when you're not paying attention to the people?

[fumikomiyasaki]

Officer Daffodils integration in the story

Here Profile is here

-Along With Chapter 2 intermission where Zhu Yuan and Qingyi are introduced… Daffodil could be teased, maybe talking with the two as one of the last cutscenes, reporting she made some interesting discoveries last time in a hollow before stopping to report her seeings when Wise and Belle come, saying her goodbyes and letting them talk alone

-Once the episode with Seth and Jane starts of course she is at the meeting too and she is the one the most worried about this whole plan… she would want to join Seth, Zhu Yuan and Qingyi when they confront Jane but gets pulled back cause they know if she is there the plan with Seth would not suceed so instead she has to wait and has other missions… however there could be after this a segment of her Character story how she felt that time with being nervous given her Colleague was trapped there but N,E.P.S gave her many missions to distract her

-In those missions she would often think back to when she started to become and officer.. how she was not taken seriously… how people thought she was too soft back then… how people didn't trust her with things… which is why she was pissed when this missions not only they didn't let her be the bait instead of Seth and dragged him into this but also cause again… she wants to protect someone and can't

-One part of her character story is the reason why she became an officer in the first place… as a kid she had many friends that were however also way too curious… but even back then… nobody took her very serious… cause she didn't really have much authority and as her besties went into a hollow unauthorized… sure they got saved by N.E.P.S but… some of her friends didn't make it….

-In the end she comes back to see mission was a success and hugs Seth for being back… at least she is glad he didn't get harmed…. however she is after her mission more determined than ever to become and officer to be taken seriously, to be relied on and to not only get driven by her emotion… sure she would have maybe done something reckless but she needs to learn when its her time to help where she can…

-The Proxy meets Daffodil wanting to get a movie about Interrogations and bows with a smile… she has a bit more of a calmer expression… hoping to grow character wise to more than just the worrywart deer

And for another small fun facts: -Her favourite Noodles are actually Fried BBQ Noodles personally… she adores them but also can go secondly for Green pepper ones -She does not like people touching her horns without permissions… if you ask its fine she can prepare mentally -But she does for small events like Halloween or Christmas decorate them to give a bit of Cheer to her workplace (maybe also another reason she is not taken that serious at times) -She does collect stickers and puts them on her notebook at times…. also has stickers to give out to kids who did well too as a cheer up gift -She does like Bangboos too, often headpatting some

Daffodil and Seths relationships: -The Irony is they have in common that out of the officers… they can be at times the ones others don't take that seriously… Seth messing up with Honesty and Daffodil with just trying hard to do a good job but not being able to fully fullfill it… although Daffodil still does better recently and is more respected now… but that is also why Seth feels a bit like he wants to catch up, they encourage another -Its not like he doesn't like her affections just, not in front of the others… he gets a bit red about it. But also he does like that she listens if he has something to talk about compared to some others that would dissmiss him -When it comes to combat they definetly work well, Daffodil freezing the enemies and Seth bashing shield first through them… however at times he also wants to just protect her even more to the point she gets flattered -Janes is the kinda tension in this cause… her teasing Seth and Daffodil being protective does lead to a lot of banter but also to Daffodil being more obvious about her crush and Jealousy… and this blockhead still doesn't see it and is just waiting till the girlies are done -In the end I feel if Daffodil would one day come out directly and upfront with him about it… maybe during a mission they had together… or when they grabbed noodles together… and they be that wholesome police couple who can be quite sucessfull detaining other criminals -However its also Seth really not getting Daffodils hints and nudges for sure. She still rub his ears, kiss him on the forehead, hug him tight to her and it be fine

[a-new-oasis]

From Tamara Fleming's Simtube Video: 'Raising Teenage Boys'

For many mommas intending to raise Watcherly children, the thorn in their side, their test is the teenage stage. Here is where the Watcher tests us all! These kids are growing up, they want to be independent, they want to do all the things the secular media has told them are "cool".

I remember I was a pain for my mother, fiercely rebellious and foolish girl I was. I wanted to cut my hair short, wear makeup and stilettos going on about how I'm equal to men! It's harder with teenage boys, who are some of the most vulnerable to sin in their youths.

So how can you raise teen boys?

Training them up for Adulthood

One of my favourite verses has always been Proverbs 22:6 - Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. I often come back to now as a momma of seven children. It is important at any age, crucial as our boys become men.

My standards for my boys is to be good, watcher-honouring men now so they can be good husbands and fathers. In your teenage years, what you are taught sticks, as I know. So, me and Xavier are training up Asher, and getting Benji ready for their adulthood.

Since I homeschool my children, it is easier than those who are reliant on the system. After all, it is hard to block your ears with all the time and still graduate! But nonetheless, Asher spends his time wildly. As much as the secularists would say our religious education is worthless, he learns more they do with their gender junk!

He helps out with Sunday School, supports our veterans and our unborn brothers in the Watcher. Since my husband's workplace put its faith in the Watcher's plan, he also helps out a couple days a week.

I know, already, I will get some comments about how teaching is a feminine job. I see you people. The holy men taught. A pastor teaches his flock. Teaching in the ministry of the Watcher is masculine! Plus, Asher will be a dad one day I hope, he must provide and occasionally providing as a father does mean teaching your sons and daughters in His way!

Hobbies

You might say, "woah, Tam, you pack your son busy with work". You're right! He's a busy young man. But if you work hard, you deserve to have hobbies. Watcher-honouring hobbies.

He goes to the library a lot. His current favourite is Russian Classic literature, specifically Dostoevsky. Not to mention the Bible! I think my sister has a rival for highlighting. He also works out, Xavier encourages him to take to weightlifting, but he's more interesting in climbing wall! One day, he wants to go Mt. Komerobi, maybe even take the gospel with him.

I still make him do his school work, don't fret! He has a knack for numbers like I did in my youth in between all the feminist garbage I was spoonfed.

Standards

I mentioned before about standards. *cheesy rewind effect* My standards for my boys is to be good, watcher-honouring men now so they can be good husbands and fathers. In order to train them up well in the way of Proverbs and Ephesians, there must be standards like good, Watcherly Moses!

For my sons that means:

No grave sins - no sex, no drugs, no rock'n'roll.

Honour and obey their parents. If Xavier says no. It's a no, that's the law of the land.

Must earnestly pray and surrender their hearts to the Lord

Must attend church every Wednesday and Sunday. In proper, modest attire. No shorts in the house of the Watcher!

Champion being a courteous, amiable person, especially to those struggling with the Watcher. And those less fortunate - the old, the poor, women and youngling.

Devote themselves to the Gospel and its command of evangelism

Media Access

Now, I know some people would call me "extreme" but one place where I'd probably get flack from my colleagues, even within my own church here in Oasis Springs - media access.

I allow Asher to use our home computer for whatever. Schoolwork, writing for our newsletter, spreading the word. He's also allowed his own phone since the Watcher has blessed us with abundance in this season of life. There's two catches there before anyone accuses me of leaving my baby so exposed to sin!

Passwords, give them to me! If he signs up to any website, I get the password just to check for anything sinful. I also check his phone semi-regularly (though he doesn't know when) for the same reason! Teenagers are sneaky - I was one.

Xavier discovered this software called Custodian, it monitors any web access and blocks anything too illicit. He and Asher are accountability buddies. My husband says that's his domain and of course I defer.

[dollopheadedmerlin]

Whenever I meet a new group of people, whether it be coworkers, a community event, or a friend's friend group, I always have to decide in the moment how to introduce myself.

I have two names. Bo and Bonnie. I like then both equally. I started going by Bo in the workplace a while back because less people called me ma'am if I didn't have Bonnie on my nametag. But I work customer facing positions less and less often now, so I tend to introduce myself as "I'm Bonnie, or Bo, whichever."

In my mind, ideally, I'd be called each name about 50% of the time. I like my full name. My boyfriend and close friends from childhood only call me by my full name, and I like it that way. Bo feels too unfamiliar for them. It's like you unlock more letters the closer you are to me.

I call myself Bonnie when I think of myself in my own head. I accidentally use my full name to refer to myself in front of people who I forgot don't know it. "And then they were like 'No, Bonnie' -- Bonnie's me by the way."

The thing I find interesting is whenever I give people the choice, they almost always choose Bo. And I think it's because they assume that I'm perhaps a trans person who hasn't been out very long, and still goes by their dead name along side their chosen name. So they, in an effort to either encourage me, or appear woke, opt to use the more neutral, or even masculine name.

But I'm not that. I've been out as trans for years. I've gotten surgery. I haven't changed names or pronouns since high school. I'm very solidly Bonnie (Bo for short).

So sometimes, when I say people can choose Bonnie or Bo, and every single person chooses Bo, I then kinda get shepperd into being Bo in that setting. If a new person gets hired at work, I get introduced to as Bo. People forget what it is short for. I'm just Bo.

And idk, it just feels weird sometimes. Like Bo is, well and truly to me, a nickname. Bonnie is my real name. I enjoy my name. And when people see me as Bo, without knowing it is short for Bonnie, it feels like a different name than if they had known what it was short for. Bo can be short for Bob, Robert, Beauregard, Beaufort, Bowie, Boyd. And goodness forbid anyone thinks it's spelt Beau (that is NOT my name!!). But it feels different depending on which name it is short for. And Bonnie is probably one of the last names anyone assumes it's derived from.

In the end none of this actually bothers me. I can always tell someone to call me Bonnie if I want. I mostly just find it interesting. How people choose which name to use for me. The reasons I guess they choose by. The way they then tell other people my name, solidifying that I'm Bo in this setting. We call you Bo here.

[moshas-corner]

Pole dancing has made me a better artist (my first ever post here!)

So, a little back story I started pole dancing a year ago as way to exercise since I hate the gym. Working a remote job is fantastic but you can easily spend weeks staring at the same four walls, which fuelled my sense of isolation. Practicing pole has improved my mind, physique, confidence and don't see myself stopping any time soon.

Last night I went to my first ever pole showcase and loved every moment of it. Sidenote, I saw someone from my workplace was there too haha, thought I was seeing things but it was actually her, either way I was not going to let the get in the way of my night. The first half of the show consisted on a twist of Cinderella, but with pole dancers (amazing) and the second half being showcases of students who attend the studio.

Pole dancing is a SEXY sport - don't get me wrong. But, being seductive isn't all the sport is about. Some students did low flow routines, others a mixture of burlesque with pole and others a mixture contemporary with pole. It was amazing. Not everyone fit into one category and that showed me the true beauty of pole, the diversity in it.

Being someone who has drawn for the majority of my life, taking it more seriously over the last 3 years, I have always tried to: find my niche, find my art style, find this, find that. Why am I always trying to find something? That thought-process consuming me and forcing me into stagnation. To the point where I wasn't even producing art anymore. Spending more time planning than actually putting pencil to paper. But, everyone goes through this right? I often times found myself getting frustrated and quite frankly I'm done beating myself up for it.

In my pole lessons, our tutor encourages us to start small and as our strength grows to push ourselves a little bit further. What you don't want to do is attempt a super hard move and injuring yourself in the process. Some days I can do all the cool moves, other days my body doesn't let me. That doesn't mean that I have regressed or I'm not pushing yourself hard enough. I have to give yourself grace and understand that when learning a new skill it is never a linear process and you don't need to figure it out all in one go. Having fun whilst and taking things a step at a time is what makes the journey fun.

All that to say that, this new mindset when it comes to my art. Do I have things figured out? No. Do I need to figure it all out now/ ever? Also no. However, doing the small things like random sketches throughout the day, experimenting with unique techniques (sweet rhyme ;) ), following inspiration online and being patient myself is at the core what my art should be about.

My art is a reflection of me, I am my own art style.

----

If you made it this far thank you! And I hope you stick around to see more from me.

Love,

Mosha XOXO

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

Hi ralph, do you have any advice, my senior manager at work who I work with regularly keeps calling me by another female colleagues name. I’ve seen him do it with two other female colleagues in a different team too. Today he did it in a meeting of around 10-15 senior executive people. He never mixes up the names of men even those he knows far less than he knows me. It made me feel quite humiliated today and I don’t know how to go about dealing with it.

I am probably not the person to ask about this in a lot of ways. There are lots of people (maybe Ask a Manager) who will give a corporate line in how to navigate this - and that can be really useful if you're interested in learning the skills of navigating the corporate world. But that's not the language I speak.

Here's what I'd say - he's giving you information about how he sees you. Your decisions about what you're going to do should start with the understanding that it's hard to make anyone change and even harder to make someone change if they have power over you.

How are your relationships with your coworkers? Particularly women, but also men? Can you build up relationships with them? Will they get your name right?

In general, I think contempt for senior management is a necessary survival skill for any worker. Sometimes they may be nice smart people (often they won't), but the structures of power mean that they will at times act like complete fucking dickheads.

My actual advice would depend on many variables that I don't know, how much you like your job, the job market for you, the size and structure of your organisation, what you want from work and life, your assessment of the senior manager's response to criticism, the nature and personality of your team etc. etc. I would encourage you to to trust yourself to navigate this based on your understanding of the situation.

But my basic advice - which is nurturing solidarity with your coworkers and contempt for senior management improves any workplace.

[swagrum76]

I rewrote a few things with my AU How do you like it?

Oldertale is an AU of Undertale where everyone is elderly and old. For obvious reasons, this AU takes place after the Pacifist route. It also still takes place in the Underground, as the monsters found the surface world boring.

CHARACTERS:

Sans; Sans wears a tan-colored jacket that is a little faded, and uses a walker. He often speaks about who he was in the past, often speaking about how he used to crack puns but doesn't anymore.

Papyrus; Papyrus has a gold tooth now and also has a hunched position.

His personality is a bit similar to normal Papyrus, but he often tries to give the player life advice, but always fails to do so. He would've had several heart attacks by now from eating all that spaghetti, but he is a skeleton, which prevents him from having heart attacks.

Flowey; Flowey is too old to even put up a fight anymore, his colors are faded aswell and the determination keeping him alive has greatly diminished. Therefore, he can only speak in one letter at a time and has a frown on his face.

Asgore; Asgore has partially retired from his job and now works at Grillbys. I say partially because he still acts like a king and does his job as a king sometimes.

Undyne; Undyne can't chase you down in this AU, as they are way too old to do so. She is often seen using a cane.

Napstablook; Napstablook is about the same, but they are more depressed than ever, often telling the player that they wish they could die, but because they are a ghost, they cannot.

He is often seen laying down in his house not doing anything.

W. D Gaster: Gaster used to be the grandpa of Sans, but he died in a tragic work accident at the age of 88. Everyone thinks he fell into the CORE, which split him across time and space, but in reality, he fell into an industrial meat grinder. (the meat grinder was located at his workplace, which was the Core Meat Processing Plant.

Alphys: Alphys has severe PTSD and mild psychosis from having to witness the incident that happened with Gaster. As a result, they often don't talk much, and when they do, they make no sense.

Toriel: Behaves like a grandmother now, and even bakes cookies for the player. All of these years have encouraged her to be more nice.

Mettaton: Mettaton never shows up in thIS AU, as his mechanical parts have become too old and rusted to work.

Asriel: Another character that never shows up, as Floweys determination is too weak to bring them back from death .

Chara: Wears faded colors, and just talks to you for a bit, then leaves.

All the other characters that would show up during random encounters just don't, as they are too old to fight anyone now. Frisk is an adult now aswell.

MECHANICS

The fight button has been completely removed, and replaced by some text in red under the "act" section. This text simply reads "push" and when you press on it, you literally give a shove to any monster you are currently fighting, thus causing them to fall over.

This "push" function has a 50 percent chance to kill any monster you are attacking, and thus, serves as the main path to the Genocide route of this AU. If they don't die, monsters will usually say something along the lines of "Didn't your parents tell you to respect your elders?", before getting back onto their feet again.

Everyone has half the health they normally would have, as aging has decreased their health quite a lot.

Nothing much else has changed besides that.

LOCATIONS

Hotlands - The Hotlands in this AU have somehow all cooled down. All of the lava in this location is now obsidian. Everything else is practically the same.

Ruins - The ruins are completely covered in a thick layer of dust due to the passage of time. You can barely see the puzzles within this location anymore, adding an extra layer of difficulty to them.

Waterfall - The Waterfall location in this AU no longer has waterfalls. That's all the changes here.

CORE - The CORE is literally just an abandoned meat processing plant. After the incident with Gaster, the factory couldn't pay the witnesses of the event or Gaster's family, and as a result, it went bankrupt.

Temmie Village - Every single Temmie here has aged significantly. Instead of paying for the Tem Shop owner's college tuition, you give them money so they can buy back pain medication.

Toriel's Home - All of the furniture within Toriel's home is dusty, but not too badly damaged. It is about the same other than that.

Snowdin - There are more buildings within Snowdin in this AU. Most of these buildings cannot be entered.

Snowden Forest - Snowden Forest has been completely cut down, as Snowden needed materials to build all of those buildings somehow.

It is completely barren. Not a single tree in sight.

Sans and Papyrus's house: The house of Sans and Papyrus has a roof that is collapsing a bit, but other than that, it is perfectly fine.

Grillby's - Grillby's looks like an old-time Western bar now. The store owner is always complaining about one thing or another, but is pretty chill besides that.

Mysterious Door - Cannot be opened

Dog Shrine - The Dog Shrine in this AU is falling apart.

Undynes House - Undyne's house is well-maintained despite all these years. Undyne is often seen here.

Garbage Dump - About the same

Blook Acres - The homes within this location now have faded colors

Thundersnail - The snails races here now take 3 entire hours to complete, as the snails themselves are too old to move at the speed they used to.

Artifact room - Nothing here has changed

Lab - The lab has been replaced by the Core Meat Processing Plant in this au

MTT Resort - The MTT Resort has been abandoned for several years now. It falls down later in the game.

True Lab - The true lab is the name for the deeper regions of the meat processing plant, and you can access this location by taking some stairs. Nothing is special in this location, it's just a few empty hallways.

Art Club Room - the art club room does not exist in this AU

New Home - The new home location has abandoned buildings in the background, and some parts of the floor here will crumble beneath your feet.

Asgore's Home - Looks like a dump now

Last Corridor - The colors of this location have all been removed. It is desaturated and dull now, and the music here is slower than usual.

Barrier - The barrier is even more white now, which probably is not possible.

[mask131]

Alright so there seems to be a slight misunderstanding in the reblogs...

I am not saying "ogre" can't be translated as "oni". In fact, I would encourage and understand "ogre" being translated by "oni" in Japanese, because the "oni" does fulfill well the archetype and idea of what an ogre is. But I am getting a bit annoyed at how the Japanese word "oni" is being translated by American editors (and commonly called by American fans) an "ogre", because while an "ogre" is indeed a part of what is the oni, the oni is far more than a simple ogre. Oni are ogres the same way they can be trolls, and demons, or even angels. To be translating "oni" as "ogre" means you take their more folktale approach as "antagonists of folktales or fairytales, brutal monstrous entities who eat people, get killed by heroes" ; but what to make of the oni who are the guardian of the underworld, or the various spirits who torment and torture the damned in the Buddhist hells?

You know, if one retells the story of Momotaro going to Onigashima, the Oni Island, yes there "oni" can become "ogre".

But if you try to talk about the anime Hoozuki no Reitetsu, an humoristic "workplace comedy" except the workplace is the Hells and the workers are oni... you know, you are here talking of the "demon" side of the oni.

But even then, it is not THAT I am talking about. The actual reason of my annoyance comes from fantasy animes and mangas. Where the oni species that is specific to Japanese culture (and is often one of the very rare Japanese monsters thrown into the standard-D&D fantasy world of elves, halflings and dwarfs and orcs), is constantly translated in America as "ogre".

Like in Dungeon Meshi, to take a recent example, where the oni girl becomes an "ogre girl":

Or the Reincarnated as a Slime anime, where again, "oni" becomes "ogre":

Or Goblin Slayer where, again, we are talking of traditional oni, yet official translation makes it "ogre":

I think I said it before, but the parallel can be drawn to how the troll of Norse folklore/Scandinavian legends can literaly be translated as "fairy", "sprite", "giant", "ogre", "dwarf", "witch" or "goblin" depending on the case and situation in which it appears... But people prefer to go by "troll" because it is more true to the spirit instead of fragmenting it into pieces. And today, as you evoked above, people use "jinn", "djinn", instead of "genies" most of the time. So... I guess an effort can be made, ESPECIALLY since all of the examples above explicitely use the oni imagery from Japanese mythology, art and religion.

You can contrast it to the more troll/giant ogres of Overlord, who here are definitively not oni:

As I said above, it makes sense to translate "ogre" as "oni" in Japanese - but in English (or even in French) the word "oni" can be used... notably because it has been used before.

I don't know about America but here in France the word "oni" is quite known and has been used multiple types in fiction and non-fiction. It is a concept people are familiar with, even if they are not experts. Again this might just be my personal bias because for us, since we have the classic French fairytales, we do know that an ogre is this:

And not this:

I thought people knew about the term since oni is literaly one of the most famous creatures and name non-Japanese people know about Japan. Even the term "yokai" is (in my experience) relatively "young" in the mind of non-Japanese media, and "oni" was well known long before that...

But again, it might be just a French thing. Or even my personal experience. The reason I thought Americans also were more aware of oni was due to how I literaly learned about onis as a kid thanks to an American media. The Jackie Chan Adventures cartoon, which had an entire season centered around the oni, and was aired quite a lot in France back in the days:

I literaly knew about the oni years before I knew anything else about Japanese culture. (That, and the Pierre Dubois Elf Encyclopedia had an entire double-page about the oni). To take a more recent example, Miraculous Ladybug even had an oni-themed villain

But again it might be just a French thing, since in France there was a huge interest in Japanese culture, to the point that France was the first European nation in term of manga and anime following. And English dubs and translations of animes/mangas have a very famous tendency to change terms quite a lot. The most famous being the "jelly doughnut" of Pokemon, but a case I am more familiar with would be the shinigami in Black Butler: in English they went with the cultural equivalent of Grim Reaper, which is a correct translation since not only is it a true cultural equivalent of the shinigami (unlike oni with ogre/troll), but also because the characters of Black Butler ARE based on the European Grim Reaper. But the French translation preferred to keep the literal translation to reflect the Japanese roots: they are "gods of death" or "death gods". Now this case is less problematic and mixed up than the "oni/ogre" case, but it does reflect how there is still a gap between trying to find a cultural equivalent and trying to convey the original term. Both are correct translation methods and for the "shinigami" case it works in both cases.

... But for the oni case problem is that, while a folktale oni works as an "ogre", and a religious oni works as a "demon", there's the in-between case of fantasy oni, who do not fit the traditional ogre role, and do not exist as "demonic" entities, rather as their own species. I guess it fits the idea of an ogre in fantasy as D&D popularized it in America... But honestly when you have a creature famous enough, well-known enough, with its own distinctive imagery and iconography, sometimes Americans could force themselves to do a bit of importation of foreign concept... (Also, mouse, if you think I am harsh about this wait to see about what some manga companies in Japan have to say about American translations! Currently there's a whole scandal about the "localizing" practice in English translations and... it is a hot, hot mess far nastier than anything being said in these reblogs :p)

This was a much-too-long explanation, because it can be summarized in one thing: if you ask me to translate something, I'll translate "oni" as "oni" and I do not like when people do not do this, especially when people keep translating alongside it "tengu" as "tengu" and "yokai" as "yokai" and "kappa" as "kappa". [In fact that's other element to my defense of the translation of "oni" as "oni": back when "oni" used to be translated "ogre", "tengu" and/or "kappa" used to be translated as "goblin". Today nobody does that... but the "ogre/oni" case still stands. I find it so weird how translators expect people to know the intricacies of "yokai" or "tengu", and yet think "oni" is too much for them.]

Speaking of cultural misinformation there is something that drives me nuts, but that all Americans seems to have adopted due to the official translation of Japanese mangas and animes.

STOP CALLING AN ONI AN OGRE!

An ogre is a fairytale character from Western Europe. Oni is a religious and mythical character from Japan.

Yes "ogre" was once used to translate "oni"... Back in the 19th century and early 20th when Europeans didn't give a fuck about the specifics of Japanese culture. Seriously, all these talks of "ogre" but you show "oni" are just a return back to the "One Hundred and One Nights ~ French Edition" days, back when a djinn became a "genie" and a pari a "fairy".

Oni is oni. Ogre is ogre. The end.

[the-feminist-philosopher]

A friendly reminder to TERFs that gender-inclusive pregnancy language was not made for you. It was made for transmen who can get pregnant by the trans community to raise awareness of how pregnant transmen are often denied pregnancy-related and gynecological healthcare for presenting masculine or for having legal documents with an "M" on them.

Even my catholic mother understand this when she called me to ask, "What do you call me?" "Mom?" "Exactly. So, Kathy is saying that the queers are erasing the term mother."

You can still be called "mother" or "pregnant woman" or what have you. This language wasn't made for you and it's hardly erasing you. You, who insists on defining women as "the sex that has the potential or ability to bear offspring or produce ova," which is just the long form of "child bearer" or "ova producer." Other great contributions I've seen to the "define a woman" discourse include: women are people with vaginas, which literally defines women as "people with vaginas" or "vagina havers;" and women are XX people, which literally defines women as "XX havers" or "people with XX chromosomes."

You all are so dense that you don't see that you literally define women by the definitions you claim to hate.

And you're all so dense- so consumed by your echo chamber- that you've forgotten that is has been Feminists and LGB+ Advocates who have championed epicenity, or the lack of gendered distinction. What's included in epicenity? Androgyny. Gender-neutral language. Gender-neutral pronouns. Unisexism. Dismantling the gender-sex binary. Supporting gender-diverse people.

You have epicenity to thank for helping carve out a space for women in the workplace. Because most job titles are and have been gendered. The change from Chairman to Chair or Chairperson, the change from waitress/stewardess/hostess/manageress to Server/Steward/Attendant/Host/Manager, the change from mailman to mail carrier, the change from cameraman to camera operator, the change from foreman to supervisor, the change from salesman to salesperson < all of this was brought forth by feminists because they understood that language creates barriers and influences stereotypes and prescribes behavioral roles. But now you- self-proclaimed feminist- are opposed to the continuation of this trend?

There were people who were opposed to women voting because a woman voting would erase "women" by erasing gendered distinction because they believed it would encourage women to leave the home and not rely on her husband or dote on her children. Because they believed there are fundamental differences between men and women that society should acknowledge and structure society around.

There were people opposed to women joining the workforce for the same reasons. All of these things were claimed to "erase" women by erasing the distinction between masculine and feminine. And you are here defending that?

The first and most patent fact in the family is the difference in the sexes... This difference is not merely physical and incidental. It is also psychical and essential. It inheres in the temperament; it is inbred in the very fibre of the soul; it differentiates the functions; it determines the relation between man and woman; it fixes their mutual service and their mutual obligations. Man is not woman in a different case. Woman is not man inhabiting temporarily a different kind of body. Man is not a rough-and-tumble woman. Woman is not a feeble and pliable man...

This difference in the sexes is the first and fundamental fact... in society... For it must ever be remembered that as the nature of the cell determines the nature of the organism which grows out of the cell, so the nature of the family determines the nature of society which grows out of the family. And the fundamental fact, without which there could be no family, is the temperamental, inherent, and therefore functional difference between the sexes...

Man is not an inferior woman. Woman is not an inferior man. They are different in nature, in temperament, in function. We cannot destroy this difference if we would; we would not if we could... This distinction between the sexes-inherent, temperamental, functional—is universal and perpetual.

-Anti Suffragist Lyman Abbott

Benevolent sexism requires gender differentiation, or the idea that “men are men” and “women are women,” and that these two groups are and should fundamentally be separate. It is responsible for the social prescription that each group must stay within certain bounds of behavior and public and private life.

One of these social prescriptions is a sex role paradigm that assigns to men the role of Aggressor and to women the role of passive Recipient, stripping women of their agency and thus encouraging men to act on behalf of women.

The TERF ideal that women are inherently good-natured, the decent victims of terrible crime who should instead be adored by society for their unique biology, and who are in need of the (masculinist) state’s (paternalistic) protection from those men contributes to placing women on this pedestal. This is responsible for the reification of gendered associations that tend to decrease the perception of women as empowered agents, or even human. Placing women on that pedestal literally strips them of their agency and humanity. And by placing us on the pedestal, the masculinist state and its actors can justify violence against us when we step off.

And all of this requires a rejection of epicenity because it requires the embrace of distinction between male and female.

Male dominant society has defined women as a discrete biological group forever. If this was going to produce liberation, we'd be free.

-Catharine MacKinnon Radical feminist legal scholar, activist, and author Professor of Law at the University of Michigan Law School

You aren't trying to re-order a male-supremacist society because you have embraced it's fundamental goal.

[wisewidow]

Hello, Your Parents Want Me To Have Your Babies

PAIRING: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

SUMMARY: Melina, my workplace’s neighbour, wants to set me up with her daughter.

I'd only ever hear about Natasha every couple of weeks, when her adoptive father, the mechanic that owned the garage workshop beside my father's cafe slash bar, met up with my uncle for beers one day last year. Ever since then, our families have been loosely intertwined, friendly but not too close. Alexei fixed my mom's wrecked car for a cheap price, in return I let his youngest daughter Yelena have free coffees whenever she pops over.

From what my father told me, Alexei's entire family, including his wife, were all involved in the family business of repairing cars, except for his eldest daughter: Natasha, who turned out to be an FBI agent living in Quantico. Dad says they're proud of her but they miss her.

"(Y/N)," my brother calls from the kitchen. I put down my phone and find him balancing three plates of sandwiches and a salad in his spindly arms.

He opens his mouth to explain the orders, but I cut him off.

"Alexei," I say, pointing to the bacon and egg sandwich. "A salad for Melina. The tuna and tomato roll is Yelena's. Did they want drinks?"

Peter nods. "Four coffees and a large bottle of water, they already have them."

I ruffle his hair to thank him and grab the plates, balancing the third on my forearm until I can place it on a tray. I carry it outside, years of waitressing practice keeping it balanced, and head towards the garage.

"Melina?" I call. Moments later the raven haired woman slips out of the office and smiles. She yells something in Russian that causes Yelena to slide out from under a silver BMW, covered in black grease. Alexei appears moments later wielding a spanner.

They hound me for their orders, gratefully patting my shoulder and carrying their food away to their separate stations. Yelena disappears into the shadows with her sandwich, and her father to his desk, but Melina simply brightens and says, "(Y/N), have you heard? Natalia is visiting."

"Yes!" Alexei yells around a mouthful of bread. "Family, reunion! Grandbabies!"

Melina hisses something in their mother tongue. I laugh, and then ask if Natasha was bringing her kids, though I wasn't aware she had any.

"He means nothing of it, Natalia is focused on work at the moment. Too focused, I think. No babies. No partner."

"Tell her about her penthouse!" Alexei encourages.

Melina flaps a hand at him in irritation. "Yes, well, she has broken up with Bruce, the shy scientist from work. And then Sharon, charming field operative, also from work. And now she refuses to date. Because of work."

I chuckle nervously. "Where are you going with this?"

Melina smiles innocently. "Nowhere. What happened to your last girlfriend, again? Your father mentioned something about . . ."  The look in her eyes is enough to egg me on, though the subject is one I rarely speak of these days.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I say, "Carol left to travel Europe."

"Shame," she nods sympathetically. "You don't seem bothered. Are you not looking for a relationship?"

"Not actively, but I'm sure another troublemaker will find me. I don't have a good track record of steady relationships," I admit.

"Neither does Natalia!" Alexei shouts.

"Oh!" I say. "Does she want Carol's number? Or my friend Harley, she's not looking for commitment."

Yelena snickers. Alexei frowns. Melina chuckles. "No, no, Natalia needs someone she doesn't work with, and you need someone serious, and we need grandbabies before we die, since Yelena neglects it."

I flush a bright red. "Grandb— I'm— okay, first of all, neither of us have the equipment for that—"

"Neither did Dad," Yelena pipes up, referring to the fact that she and her sister were adopted.

"Hey!"

"(Y/N)!" Peter calls, rounding the corner. "Ned's coming over to pick me up, we need to finish our physics project. Uncle Ben should be here soon, can you manage the bar until he gets here?"

I jump onto the excuse and yell back affirmation, say a quick goodbye to Melina before speed-walking back to the cafe.

Peter leaves with Ned soon after, and Ben arrives at around the same time. I move to the kitchens while he takes over serving our regulars, as he's friendlier with them than me.

I work on making more sandwiches and tapas meals until four, when my shift ends. I kiss Uncle Ben on the cheek and head home.

The smell of paprikash greets me as I unlock the door to my apartment, which I guess means that my roommate is home. I call out a hello to her and head to the shower.

I groan happily as the hot water rains down on my front. I close my eyes and lean my head back, thinking over how strange the day had been, and lose myself in a trance of relaxation.

"(Y/N/N)!" Wanda barges in. I jump and almost slip grabbing the shower curtain to cover my body as I peek out at her.

"I'm naked," I hiss.

She ignores me and holds up two clothes hangers. "Pantsuit or dress?"

I push my wet hair out of my face. "Uh, are you bar-hopping with Vision or going to a family dinner?"

"Get together with some friends," she explains. "Vis, Sam, Steve and some guy named Bucky who I'm informed we're supposed to be pretending Steve isn't in love with, do you know him?"

"Nope."

"Okay, well, he's bringing some friends, so I'm bringing you. Don't make that face, you know almost everyone."

"I don't feel like getting drunk," I complain.

"Good! You can be the designated driver. Pantsuit or dress?"

Grumbling, I tell her, "Dress."

"Okay, thanks, you wear the pantsuit, be ready by seven. May the Force be with you!"

She ducks as I throw my shampoo bottle at her. We bicker and mock and tease as I pat myself dry and she changes into the scarlet dress.  While she braids her hair, I carefully slip into the navy and white striped pantsuit, and we move into her bedroom to make use of her vanity, since the sun's lowering position in the sky shone straight into the window while my room would be encased in dimness by now. I sit in the chair and she leans over me, brushing her eyelashes with delicate mascara.  We fall into our normal going-out-getting-ready rhythm, periodically handing each other different brushes, comparing lipstick shades, and commenting on our days. She tells me about her brother's latest shenanigans and I make the grave mistake of commenting on Melina's attempted set-up earlier today, much to Wanda's entertainment. The two had never met but they both shared the pure ecstasy that came with matchmaking involving me.

"Do you think she's pretty?" Wanda wonders.

"I've seen photos," I shrug. "She's a redhead. Yelena says she changes hairstyles often."

"That doesn't answer my question! Pretty redhead or no?"

"They were baby photos, Wanda! I didn't have an opinion on her looks past the Wonder Woman pajamas."

She hums, and turns to draw a small heart under my left eye with her gel liner pen. "It would be nice if you wound up with her, but if you do fall madly in love with her beautiful red locks and decide to move to Washington to marry her and have her babies, I will murder you. You pay your rent on time and you're fun and please, please do not make me move back in with my brother."

"Why does everyone keep bringing up babies?" I yell.

An hour later we're pulling up to the bar in the back of  a cab arguing about getting a cat. The debate of whose bathroom would host the litter tray is interrupted by Wanda spotting Vision through the window and quickly smacking my arm and hissing at me to hurry up and pay so she can sneak in and scare him. Unfortunately, I can't locate my purse inside my bag.

"(Y/N), (Y/N), go, go, go . . ."

"Wanda, Wanda, going, going, going . . . Aha!" I pay the driver and find myself being ushered inside before I can put my purse back in my bag.

Sam, a friend of Wanda's from college, ends up foiling her evil master plan by pointing her out as soon as she walks in the door. Vision, being a good sport, pretends to be startled when she yells "BOO!" in his ear. As she cackles manically before sliding into the chair beside him, I notice the only free space is by the pretty blonde woman beside a man with brown hair pulled into a bun.

"Oh, look who I dragged out with me!" Wanda exclaims, taking a sip of Vision's drink and making a grand gesture with her hands. "(Y/N)!"

I'm greeted with a chorus of hello's. I bow and grin as I sit by the woman and offer a polite smile. Steve leans over points to the brunet man. "This is Bucky, we were close as friends. As kids. We were close as friends, when we were kids."

Sam snorts into his beer.

Steve clears his throat awkwardly. "And this is his partner from work, Nat."

I get a closer inspection and my eyes widen in shock. "Natalia?"

"Her name is Natasha." Steve corrects.

"I thought her name was Natalie?" Vision frowns.

"She goes by Nat, who cares?" Sam shrugs.

"Natalia Alianovna Romanova?" Wanda yelps. "(Y/N)! You didn't tell me this was the Natalia!"

"The what? I— Do I know you two?" Natasha asks, bewildered.

"Not me!" Wanda says, and then makes a motion for zipping her lips shut.

Everyone turns to me. I chuckle nervously. "I should probably explain. Hi, I'm (Y/N), your parents want me to have your babies."

[amaya-chwan]

Therapy Game Restart Discussion: Who is Onodera?

Hello everyone! Hope you are all well~ ❤️💛💜 I've had a headscratcher of an ask/message regarding Onodera, so I figured I'll make it into one big post!

Before I begin this Q&A/discussion post (feel free to comment below if you have any thoughts), I have looked through past chapters to gather the information I will put into this post to support my predictions. Not all chapters are readily available for everyone at the moment as only one volume of TGR is out right now, so I shall put the chapter numbers for your future reference! ⚠️ Also, just a note! These opinions are my personal thoughts, conjectures, and opinions, so please don't think I am saying one idea or speculation is wrong--this is just how I see it, and of course I could very well be wrong! And I also am not fluent in Japanese, so I may have some translation errors!

⚠️ Also, a warning, this will be a long post! Keep reading if you're interested and please let me know your own thoughts!

First, in an earlier ask, I was directed to a translation group that said Onodera is a man. With the help of Google and Google Translate (because I don't understand/speak Spanish), I found that post (dated April this year) and the origin of the picture they used in that post. The image is from Hinohara-sensei's 13th August 2020 tweet here and is also below for reference:

Now, all I can remember from first seeing that image is "Woow, so pretty! A female character? A love rival? A threat? OH it's the infamous director they're all talking about???"

This image was released around the time chapter 8 was released, i.e. the first chapter we see Onodera in full.

Looking at the image again, I can see how Onodera could be seen as a female or a male. Onodera has long hair, yet no visible breasts. There is no evidence of an Adam's apple, but that could just be because of the turtleneck as part of their outfit. Furthermore, in chapter 13, we see a view of Onodera from behind. There are no "womanly curves" visible in this view of Onodera.

After searching some Japanese blogs, some fans also had the same thoughts: no breasts = possible male, the shape of the face etc. Here are the blogs I found: [1] [2] [3] but most of these are from around chapter 8.

Just about the breast argument: there are a lot of different shapes for breasts. I learnt that when working at a department store selling bras during university. It is possible that Onodera is really flat chested or just has very little breast tissue. Not sure if that's getting too technical now, ahah, but what I want to say is that the lack of breasts isn't a definite yes to Onodera being a man.

Hinohara-sensei also has not explicitly stated throughout TGR so far (ch1-13) that Onodera is male or female.

From chapters 8-12, Onodera is always referred to as 院長 (director) by Shizuma and the nurses at the clinic. No gender-specific pronouns have been used in the story nor by any characters to refer to Onodera when speaking so far (that I have read). So confirming Onodera's gender is just misleading at the present moment.

We do find out in chapter 9 that Onodera's first name is 昌 akira. Akira is a gender neutral name in Japan. It is often given to males, but it is not uncommon for females to have this name. Which, I think, is genius on Sensei's part. It leaves us all thinking!

Q: So Amaya-chwan, what do you think Onodera's gender is?

Just for me as I've been reading TGR the past 1.5 years, I see Onodera as a woman as I have been "encouraged" to see Onodera as one by the little subtleties in the story, and Minato sees Onodera as a female, so I probably am viewing Onodera in Minato's POV.

(Please keep reading on for more insights and answers to questions! Really, this post is long! 😅)

In chapter 9, Onodera's older brother, who is also Shizuma's university professor (and his last name is not Onodera), makes small talk with Shizuma regarding the staff at his placement:

Shizuma's professor says: By the way, Shizuma-kun, how've you been!? You haven't been bullied, have you!? // The female team here is scary, right~ You know, Nakajou-kun and I were in the same grade...

So here, I'm made to think Onodera's clinic is pretty much all female, including Onodera too.

Fun fact: His professor uses the suffix -kun for Nakajou-sensei, yet Nakajou-sensei is a female and -kun is commonly used for males these days. But, it is also used for females in very specific situations. I'm not too sure what the situations are, but I have heard them used for females before.

In the same chapter (9), while Shizuma is changing out of his scrubs in the men's locker (?) room, Onodera walks in. He is slightly flustered, and kindly reminds her that she's walked into the men's locker room. Her reaction is "Huh? Ahh..." So here, again, I am made to believe Onodera is female.

While no gender-specific pronouns have been used to address Onodera, Minato and Itsuki have referred to Onodera as a female in chapter 13.

The kanji for "female/woman" is 女. In these two images, Minato refers to Onodera as 上司の女 female superior, and from Minato's story, Itsuki hence calls her 職場の女の人 female from (Shizuma's) workplace. This is the only time Onodera has been referred to as a female.

⚠️ Just a note going forward in this discussion, I will now call Onodera "she/her" as that is what I believe Onodera's gender is at the present moment!

Now, I did get a second ask from an Anon! Here they are below with my responses:

This one is about what's behind Onodera. I think she's a pretty interesting character. I actually think she's a trans woman or a non-binary trans woman. Sensei has been dropping so many hints to that... The name her brother calls her might be her dead name. He complains about her hair and what their father would say. She's designed to have flat breasts, perhaps she's not under hormone therapy, perhaps her "trips" and "days off" have something to do with reassignment surgeries...

She most definitely is an interesting character. I wouldn't say Onodera being transgender is out of the realm of possibility because the story is still ongoing. But regarding her name, I don't know if I'd call it a dead name since it is gender neutral already. Perhaps the kanji for a male Akira name would be different to a female one though?

About the hair comment (ch10), I just thought it was unruly? I honestly didn't think too much of it! What I will add is that the kanji for hair (髪) is used, but the reading is あたま head. Not sure why just yet, so I'll just leave that here as some extra information for the moment.

Not sure what I really think about a) her flat-chestedness and b) her insanely long business trips yet! I figured a) might be a character design, and b) she really is a top-notch veterinarian so she's probably in high demand. But I could be completely off the mark!

Also, I don't know where to add this random bit in from the story, but in chapter 12, we find out that Onodera has been calling one of the staff the wrong name for more than 10 years now. Not sure if this new piece of info affects anything?

But again, that is a very interesting prediction/thought you have about Onodera, and I wouldn't say it's not possible!

She's kind of a female Minato, psychologicallly and in appearance, which brings some challenges. And one more thing that I think hints to that: "I'll make it so your body can never be satisfied by any woman", Minato says to Shizuma. As the last chapter leaves it at that, we don't know exactly what he is talking about. [spoiler?] I haven't seen the Japanese text yet to be sure if he's clear about topping Shizuma.

That was exactly my thought when she was first introduced! That's part of the reason why I think Minato sees her as a threat, especially when he saw her for the first time and was told she is a 美人beautiful person (both in chapter 12). She and Minato definitely share some characteristics, but I find she's a bit more socially-awkward than Minato given her background (Chapter 9 & 10).

For the dialogue, the Japanese lines and the most literal translations I can give are:

今から　静真くんを抱く From now, (I'll) hold/embrace you, Shizuma-kun.

どんな女に出会っても　絶対満足できない体にしてあげる No matter the women you encounter, I will make it so your body definitely cannot be satisfied (by any of them).

Hopefully we'll find out what Minato means by that exactly in the next chapter, which I hope comes to me this week!

But if that's what he's talking about, it's 1. poor Minato being transphobic (besides being biphobic towards his own boyfriend)* 2. poor Minato probably foreshadowing his own fall. If Onodera happens to be a woman with a d**k, she can do whatever Minato thinks a cis man only can do. That's not what will make Shizuma stay by his side. Shizuma will stay by his side because he loves Minato. And that's that. Debunks biphobic myths, debunks transphobic myths. *He's not a bad person, he's got issues

Okay, this is probably as straight-forward as I can say this, but I just want to say that I don't know enough about the issues faced by the LGBTQI+ community. My friends have kindly answered all my questions so far as I don't want to be ignorant or rude when learning more about my friends and the community. I don't want to give off the air that I'm assuming anything since I don't want any misunderstandings. And I am fully aware that I need to educate myself more regarding this!

So about Minato, I'm not completely sure what you mean by number 2. But he definitely has his share of trauma, insecurities, and fears regarding his relationship with Shizuma. Having Onodera as a threat in this story really helps drive Minato's growth. The story is titled Therapy Game Restart, so what I gather from the title is that Minato is going to face another fear/insecurity he has, something deeply-rooted in him, and it's going to get really heavy and complicated, but he will eventually get through it and it will help him heal and grow as a character, and hopefully strengthen his faith in his relationship with Shizuma.

So far, I believe this "fear" is carrying on from +Play More, that Shizuma can be whisked away by a female at any moment.

But yes, Minato has to realise for himself that his and Shizuma's love, relationship, and bond is strong enough for him to not worry about Shizuma leaving him so abruptly. He has to learn to trust in Shizuma more, and TGR is slowly revealing that, especially in chapter 13.

I'll stop here. I have already written long analyses on this series and I think about making them public at some point. But it would be nice to hear from you! Maybe I'm completely wrong in my interpretations! I'm really sorry for being so annoying and maybe using inappropriate language. I really didn't mean to bother you. But I never see anyone making these points. I just want to know if I'm thinking unreasonably...

I love reading different analyses, opinions, story predictions, the whole lot!! So please feel free to ask me or post your own ideas. It's always a welcome thing for me to discuss stories and learn new things! Don't be sorry that you're being a bother or annoying, because it's not a bother at all!

We're all allowed to have our own ideas and opinions about stories, and these ideas will change once something is canon in the story, and ultimately is something we will have to accept too.

So yeah, just my two cents. Thank you for being so patient with my response, dear Anon!

To anyone reading at this point, thank you for reading this far! ❤️💛💜

I shall see you in our next set of takeaways~ As always, stay safe and take care of yourselves and your loved ones! 💜

(2021-05-17: Speedy proofreading is done ahah! And yes, my brain is still so full of 山河令/Word of Honor right now, so I have been VERY distracted! Highly recommend this drama, guys! It's up for free on the official Youku Youtube page! Totally not an endorsement, but I love this drama! AHHHHH!! Gong Jun [Simon] be living on my mind rent free~)

[mellometal]

Hey, everyone.

I've tried to compose myself before making this post. This is a subject that I've touched on a little bit in posts, but I've never done a deep dive into JUST this topic. I was going to make a post solely about this subject sooner, but this one in particular is really hard for me to talk about without getting emotional...and yet Dhar Mann has talked about this on quite a few occasions in the most insincere, toxic ways. I'll do my best to discuss this topic without getting too emotional.

It's about a serious subject that people still are ignorant about and don't take seriously. Even to this day, with the body positivity and body neutrality movements. (I don't know of a better way to describe just being neutral about your body. Sorry if it sounds weird.)

For anyone who doesn't know what I'm referring to (honestly, I don't blame you, as this is a subject that's often seen as normal and is encouraged in society for the most part), I'm talking about fatphobia. Hating on people for being fat. Discriminating people because of their weight in the workplace, at the doctor's office, just in general. Not many stores having inclusive sizes. People being treated like they're subhuman because they're fat.

I want to say this first, before I bash on Dhar Mann again: I'm a plus-size young woman. This is something that I have personal experience with. Your weight has no significance to your worth as a person. If you do happen to be overweight, obese, whatever, you're not subhuman. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're worthy of being loved, listened to, treated with kindness, and respected, just like anyone else who isn't fat.

If you treat people like utter shit for their weight, get some help. Why do you care about somebody else's weight? Obviously there's an exception to this, like if they're so big they can't move or they're so skinny their organs are showing....because those are causes for concern, but other than that, mind your own business. Even if they are in those extremities, unless you're their doctor and/or their family, STILL mind your own business. How the fuck does a fat person simply breathing and existing affect you in any way? News flash: there will always be fat people.

Before I get to the weekly ritual of tearing TWO of Dhar Mann's videos apart (the next one will be in another post or I'll reblog this post and continue on there), here's an obligatory trigger warning for the video analysis itself and my response: The following post contains fatphobia, fat shaming, a man being super fucking misogynistic and treating women like they're objects, and there's even a touch of some racial aggression. How shocking. Because Dhar Mann really seems to get a kick out of writing about racism to make it all cute. Oh yeah, you're totally solving racism, Dhar Mann. /s

My response contains my experience with fatphobia, relationships with food, mentioned/implied thoughts of s3lf h@rm, feeling like I'm unworthy of being treated like an actual person because of my weight, and absolute rage. Like usual. My responses are very heated. This one especially. It's LONG. Buckle up.

With all this out of the way, let's get to the first video that I want to tear apart. This one is about the auditions for a record deal. I will get to the video about a kid wanting to be a host of a radio show later.

To sum up the first video, a plus-size white woman (Krissy Elliot) is singing for an agent (Isaac) and his assistant (Evette) so she can follow her dream to become a singer. Isaac cuts Krissy off to viciously bash her for being a plus-size woman. Evette stands up for this woman, and says she sounded fine and to let her finish. Isaac doesn't listen to Evette, let alone take what she said into consideration. He continues to ridicule Krissy for her appearance, that she'll "never make it in the music industry" (WRONG, do you know how many plus-size people are in the fucking music industry? There are A LOT more now than when I was growing up and it honestly makes me so happy. There were more plus-size people in the entertainment industry than in the music industry back then.), suggested that she "become a chef or a food critic" because she apparently loves being around food (being a chef or a food critic are noble professions, but NEVER fucking assume ANYONE'S relationships with food), to the point where Krissy left the room in tears.

Here are a few screenshots for context:

When this skinny, conventionally attractive woman (Jesse) comes in, Isaac's mood does a COMPLETE 180° and he's all sunshine and rainbows. Then right as soon as Jesse did her audition, Isaac is over the fucking moon, complimenting her physical appearance, treating her like an object, and signs her up for a record deal RIGHT AWAY. Pay attention to Isaac's facial expressions in one of these screenshots.

Evette suggests that they sign Krissy for a record deal instead. Because she was "the best singer they've had all day". Isaac, still all hot and bothered by a skinny, conventionally attractive woman that he's treating like an object, tells Evette that people like Krissy don't make it in the music industry because they're "overweight and unattractive", and is verbally aggressive towards her when she does nothing but explain her stance. Isaac sees this as Evette "talking back" (remember how I mentioned that there's racial aggression? He says that Evette is "talking back" because she happens to be a black woman) and fires her. He signs Jesse a record deal and has a blast with her.

The award ceremony comes around, and they're picking a winner for Best New Artist. They pick the winner, and it's....guess what? You'll never get it! It's Krissy Elliot! Why? Because Evette became her agent after Isaac fired her. Krissy goes into her whole story about how she was laughed out of every single agency and that she worked hard. Good for her. Jesse is obviously very happy for Krissy. We gotta love women supporting women.

This video was again another dumpster fire. As usual. Like I said, with this video in particular, I couldn't get through the first thirty seconds the first time around. Because I've dealt with shit like this. Obviously not with the music industry because I don't even think I'd be good enough to step into an agency...but I mean in my personal life.

Being told by my own dad that he was "tired of buying bigger clothes for me" when I was a young teenager, despite him buying almost nothing but "junk food".

Having my abuser make comments about my weight and talking about diets while I'm trying to eat my food, despite her being overweight.

Having someone I know (not anyone I'm friends with) make a comment about me eating a few things (ONE small piece of broccoli, two baby carrots, a small handful of chips, and ONE small piece of pineapple) and said to "save some for everyone else", even though I was saving food for everyone else, which is why I took so little. She tried to justify it with the fact nobody was there yet (why do you think I took very little food?), and she "was saying that to everyone" (why did she look at ME when she said that instead of making it clear that she was talking to everyone [saying "Hey, everyone" before the comment about saving some for everyone else IS NOT HARD]?), even though I know it was just to save her own ass. I knew she said that to me because I'm plus-size. She didn't say anything to anyone else, nor did she make it clear that she was talking to everyone.

Another person I know (not a person I'm friends with) saying that I overreacted (I did not overreact; SOMEONE TRIGGERED ME and you did NOTHING about it) even though they all KNEW my relationship with food is complicated. They KNEW that I don't really like eating in front of other people. I was upset that someone MADE A FUCKING DISGUSTING, TRIGGERING COMMENT ABOUT ME EATING VERY FEW FOOD ITEMS, ALMOST ALL WERE HEALTHY, DESPITE OTHER PEOPLE EATING A LOT MORE THAN I DID AND PICKING AT EVERYTHING. That day, I was begging one of my friends (one of the people I trust to eat around) to PLEASE take me home because I didn't want to be there (never wanted to be there in the first place), I was tired (I worked all night the night before and was forced to go to a meeting before all this happened), I didn't feel comfortable there anymore, there were way too many people (four individuals plus all their staff from another house were in the house I work in), I couldn't breathe (I was either about to pass out, have a panic attack, or just start crying), but nobody listened to me. I ended up getting a bus to go home.

(Sorry about all that. I was trying not to get emotional in this post. I just needed to share how this can affect people.)

Onto my response, which is all in the screenshots below.

ETA: I know the screenshots for my response are very jumbled right now and it’s difficult to read. I apologize to anyone who’s unable to fully read it! Because this is part one of this whole subject of fatphobia (I’m making a post about the boy wanting to become a radio host very soon), my response here will tie into that post. My response to that video is vastly the same, despite not making a comment on that video as of right now (the radio host one). 

I’ll be typing out my full response here. I apologize for weird formatting. Instagram wouldn’t let me break up my response into paragraphs. I’ll break them up into paragraphs here instead.

CC (Combination of the first, second, and third screenshots, aka, the first part of my response):

 I have a few questions before I get into my thoughts on this video. One, how the hell does your weight have any significance on your worth as a person, and if you do think this way, why would you think that? Two, do you know that fatphobia is a lot more than just judging a person for being fat? Three, why do you feel like you can speak for fat people like myself with this piss poor excuse for a video that I could barely get through the first thirty seconds of the first time? 

You can’t speak for any of us. I can’t speak for every fat person because not everyone has the same experiences as me. 

I’ve been bullied for my weight in real life as well as online. People have called me ugly just because of my weight. By the way, your weight doesn’t equal beauty, and that’s what I’m still learning. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. 

On quite a few occasions, I have actually thought about doing dangerous things to my body that I don’t feel comfortable going into here. All because I had people try to boil me down to my weight, call me ugly, and destroy whatever self-esteem I had left. You don’t know what fat people go through, so don’t act like you do. 

There are many factors that go into why a person may be fat, including medical conditions, mental illness, trauma, genetics, etc. All of those things are none of your business unless those people decide to be open about it. 

No, it’s not always healthy to be fat (obviously there are extremities on both sides of the spectrum of weight that are extremely unhealthy), but it doesn’t make a person any less of a human being. Fat people are human too. Quit treating us like we’re not. We deserve to be treated like everyone else who isn’t fat. I’m not saying put all fat people on a pedestal. I’m saying treat us like human beings.

CC (Combination of the fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh screenshots, aka, the second part of my response):

Remember how I said that fatphobia isn’t just about judging people for being fat? Well, there’s the “fat tax” on plus-size clothing (even though it maybe only costs a little bit more in fabric, if there’s any difference in making clothes for people who aren’t fat), limited styles for fat people in stores (making a lot of us have to buy fast fashion or have to spend a fortune on clothes that actually flatter us), not very many stores have inclusive sizes still (if you don’t at least carry max 5XL or a size 38/40 in pants size, you cannot call yourself inclusive), and a lot of other things.

Many fat people, myself included, are afraid to seek medical attention for anything (even checkups) because of doctors who only focus on our weight and not on what we came in to see them for. They write it off as if our weight is the sole cause of our problems, which isn’t always the case.

How about we talk about how expensive it is to eat healthy in a lot of places? Not everyone can afford to make fresh meals every day, let alone once a week. Maybe they were never taught how to due to their upbringing. You don’t know.

I’ve had people comment on my weight, what I’m eating (even if I’m eating something healthy like fruits and veggies), talk about my weight or diets EVEN WHILE I’M TRYING TO EAT, and it’s caused me to wait until I’m alone or around someone I trust to eat anything. As a result, I have a complicated relationship with food now.

Telling someone they’re fat doesn’t help them. They know that. They see themselves every day. People may want to change, but they either are afraid to ask for help, or they don’t know where to start. Some may not want to change. It’s up to them, honestly. If you want to help them lose weight, maybe suggest any physical activity they’d have fun doing and do them with them? I dance for fun. Also, you could help set up meal plans with them. 

If you’re not going to at least try to help them lose weight if you’re so concerned about them (this is all if they actually want to change things and don’t know where to start), I cannot say this in a sweeter way: shut your mouth and mind your own business. Because you’re just being a cunt at that point.

CC (eighth screenshot, aka, the third and final part to my response):

There are quite a few plus-size people in the entertainment industry as a whole who are/were very successful. Remember the late Chris Farley and Aretha Franklin? Chris Farley was big, but that didn’t change how great of an actor he was, how funny he was, or how much of an impact he made in the entertainment industry. Aretha Franklin was a plus-size black woman in the music industry, but she’s inspired SO MANY artists we have today! There are many plus-size men, women, and I believe even nonbinary people in the public eye in general. Like I’ve said, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. That’s why the body positivity and body neutrality movements are a thing.

(I know I implied that I thought about sh here in my response, but please don't worry about me as far as that goes. I'm fine now. I would never go through with anything like that.)

In the last part of my response where I mentioned some plus-size people in the entertainment industry as well as the music industry (the late Chris Farley and the late Aretha Franklin), I was going to name more people, but my comments were getting too long. I'll name some more here off the top of my head:

Lizzo (rapper), the Piggy Dolls (the first K-Pop girl group made up of actual plus-size women), K*v*n Sp*c*y (I don't feel comfortable saying his name because he's a disgusting person, but he's another plus-size man...he was in King of Queens and in A LOT of movies), PSY, Greyson Gritt (a genderqueer person in the music industry), Elle King, Produce Pandas (the first music group in China full of plus-size men), Martha Wash, Chubby Checker, Fats Domino, Big Angel (a J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Chubbiness (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Pottya (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women)...there are so many that I found, but if you want to add more plus-size artists, plus-size actors, plus-size comedians/comediennes, feel free to add them in the comments!

Dhar Mann, you'll never know what plus-size people go through. You don't know what we go through. You have NO IDEA what we go through on a daily basis. Stop acting like you do. Because you don't, and you never will.

By the way, Dhar Mann, this will NOT be the last post I'll make about you or your videos. The more you make fucking deplorable, poorly written bullshit, the more posts I'll make! Teehee!

If you got this far, thank you so much. The next part of this is coming very soon. I'm sorry for not posting too many screenshots from the video. I wanted to fit in my response because it's important for people to see.

Have a good day/afternoon/night, y'all. Love you!

[windbournefree]

AARON SORKIN'S "WOMAN PROBLEM" AND THE NEWSROOM

After binging on The Newsroom (and loving it) created by Aaron Sorkin I got to thinking about his reputed "woman problem" when some YouTube commenter described all the female characters on the show as "twits." That's a characterization I strongly disagree with, and will show why, but also can't shake the intuitive sense that his portrayal is rightly controversial. By that I mean it is right that it should be a matter of discussion, not that it is necessarily wrong. The people holding the discussion need to decide that for themselves.

First the bald facts. Women in this drama hold power: Leona founded and still owns the company, Mackenzie is the Executive Producer of the network's flagship news program with a male second-in-command and many male staff, Sloan is the acknowledged smartest person in the company with far more lucrative prospects awaiting her should she choose them, Maggie is promoted instantly from a personal aide to an associate producer by a woman despite her youth and inexperience. Women are in leadership roles with real power that they do exercise.

In their relationships to men, the women in The Newsroom engage in give and take.

Mackenzie may look at Will like a doe-eyed schoolgirl at times but she's in love with him and is self-recriminating about previous behaviors. She isn't like that with any other male characters. Even with Will she frequently takes charge and makes him follow her direction, which he does. Mac exercises real power in her relationship with Will from episode one on. When Will doles out his "punishments" she only takes them to the degree that she believes she should. She holds the power at any time to say, "That's enough!" which she does in regards to the engagement ring. When she does that he realizes he's gone too far and changes his behavior.

Maggie coddles Don in most of the scenes we see of them and breaks up with him mostly in scenes we don't see. I'd venture to guess that the early breakups happen because the relationship has no room for her passion and she gets tired of soothing his ego to make things work. In contrast, Maggie's drawn to Jim because he awakens and allows room for her passion. Most employees who confront and yell at their bosses as much as she does with Jim would be suspended and/or fired. He lets her get away with it to a degree because he recognizes that that same passion drives her to become an excellent journalist. And because he likes her. Both are true. Every once in awhile he has to reprimand her in public to assert authority over his team or it gives permission to his other staff to behave the same way. Maggie is no shrinking violet. She is strong and self-directed and refuses to allow a man to control her. Most of her errors come from inexperience and human frailty. None of them occur because she's a woman.

Sloan clearly wears the pants in her relationship to Don which, to his surprise, he doesn't mind. Ever once in awhile, though, they switch roles or just relate as equals. Don goes from dating the young intern who part of him wants to dominate to dating the highly intelligent, self-directed professional who no man can dominate and becomes a better version of himself as a result. Sloan's errors in her first broadcast about Fukushima occur not because she is scared by Will as a man but because she's scared by him as respected professional. His gender doesn't matter to her. When Charlie yells at her about it she tells him strongly, "Do not call me 'girl,' sir!" And that's to the head of the News Division.

Leona clearly rules the roost and fights with Charlie as an equal or as a subordinate, never as a superior. They fight the way old friends do.

In no respect are women as a class portrayed as inferior or subordinate to the power of men. So why do I get that intuitive itch that there's something old-fashioned about Sorkin's writing on gender relations?

I think it's that some of the male characters in The Newsroom tend to be the carriers of logic and reasoning while the female characters tend to be the carriers of emotional expression. This isn't always true: Sloan is highly logical (while also passionate) and Charlie is highly emotional (while also reasonable) and Neal carries both in balance. It's certainly true, however, of the Jim & Maggie relationship which is intended as a reflection of the older Will & Mackenzie one. Remember how, in episode one, Mackenzie points out Maggie to Jim and tells him that she's a younger version of her before she grew into herself and got hotter with age? And why has Jim long been Mackenzie's choice for supervising producer? Could it be because he reminds her of Will? I think so. I also think it's fair to assume that Sorkin does not intend for that rational/emotional dichotomy to typify all gender relations since he gives us alternate examples. More likely it's because Sorkin is a brainy guy who prefers an emotionally expressive woman to bring balance into his life. When he writes romance it comes out of who he is, what he likes. That's how he connects to the material at a feeling level. Some viewers may prefer a flip on those traditional associations and the Don & Sloan relationship may have been his attempt to provide that. It's not where Sorkin feels at his strongest or most natural, though, so he writes what he knows.

There ARE problems with The Newsroom, though, that I think if addressed would have reduced criticism. In no way should bosses be allowed to date subordinates over whose careers they have an influence. The producers decide what stories are aired. The career of a journalist rises and falls with the number and quality of stories they get aired. Dating a subordinate in this environment is a breach of ethics and most professional workplace standards. To be fair, Maggie was first an intern then a personal aide and only became an associate producer (journalist) as Don was on his way out so it wasn't a total breach; definitely in the gray area, though. The sexual tension between Jim and Maggie, obvious to everyone (as Sloan pointed out in the finale), often broke out into open conflict. Mackenzie should have addressed this conflict as their supervisor but instead encouraged it. As Jim points out it was Mac's idea for him to get together with Maggie in the first place. Again, it was Mac's advice to Jim to "gather ye rosebuds while ye may" that led to his and Maggie's first kiss and then Jim deciding this was wrong. Mackenzie's regrets about her relationship with Will colored her judgment and led her to offer advice that may have been okay coming from a friend but was inappropriate coming from a supervisor. She could have been rightly disciplined or even fired by HR if found out. Jim does decide that he can't date a subordinate however he feels but Mac should have intervened and threatened to move one of them out if they couldn't handle the tension in a professional manner. In the series finale Jim offers the Supervising Producer position to the woman he's in love with. How is that not an HR violation? How would Maggie's career not be dogged by rumors of "sleeping her way to the top" if she accepts it?

The other thing is the way emotional conflicts between several of the characters break out into office wide battles. Talk about an unsafe working environment! I can't see how the entire management staff wasn't fired on an almost weekly basis. And when Mackenzie commends Maggie for her loyalty by saying she wouldn't complain to HR if her hair was on fire I cringed. Is that the message you want to send out in a #MeToo world?

Aaron Sorkin says he likes to write "very romantically, very idealistically." The chaos in the newsroom is intended for laughs, not to be taken as a serious reflection of a workplace. The characters are flawed and frequently do not do what they should. The lack of HR supervision is even mentioned by a character in season one so there's awareness that liberties are being taken. I don't think there's an inherent woman problem here, just a production not as sensitive as it might be to the struggles women face in the workplace. There are good reasons why "no dating" policies are in place, why it's unprofessional to carry your personal life into the workplace. Workplace comedies routinely feature HR nightmares for the sake of laughs: Brooklyn 99 is a good example. We don't take them seriously. It's the sheer intelligence of The Newsroom and the realistic setting that may make the comedy part seem more serious than it is. Personally I see the show as a kind of joyful fantasy; Sports Night without the canned laughter. If you can separate the fantastic from the realistic I think you'll find that The Newsroom is actually very empowering for women.