#And to the inevitable person who decides this is about them when it isn't? if i dont know you personally it clearly isnt about you.
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rheakira · 8 months ago
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Would it really make a big difference at this point if this account stopped updating.
My time in fandom has become almost exclusively miserable and while I still want to draw and make things I enjoy, I just feel kind of sick looking at this place. Its like people are either way too comfortable being lame to others or people are extremely cozy with letting people be awful. I don't even want to look at this place anymore even as I'm making works related.
Honestly joining in the first place was a mistake, but it really has just been an overall horrendous. Worse than I ever could have imagined. And what's worse, outing things I know in public will most likely only turn back on me, so I'm permanently trapped. This is probably being read with so much confusion.
I might be disappearing from this site. It won't put a big dent in this fan base because it will move on like nothing happened. I'm just really tired lately. Waking up and feeling like I'm dying isn't worth this nonsense really.
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rainydayathogwarts · 6 months ago
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ᴍᴀʀᴀᴜᴅᴇʀꜱ ᴇʀᴀ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ
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ˋ°•*⁀➷ navigation
꩜ smut ❀ fluff 𖤓 angsty/angry 𖤐 funny
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ʀᴇᴍᴜꜱ ʟᴜᴘɪɴ
✩ can't take my eyes off you - The first time virgin!reader wants Remus to continue (❀꩜)
✩ precious, drunk boyfriend - In which Remus gets more drunk than ever and clings onto his girlfriend for dear life. (❀꩜)
✩ the rabbit hole - In which remus lupin has a way with all the ladies, even the popular girls (❀)
✩ teasing kisses - Basically just dry humping with bf!remus lupin (❀꩜)
✩ off limits - Remus can't help but like the one person who's off limits, but it seems like she likes him too... (part 1 \\ part 2) (❀𖤓)
✩ ground rules - Remus isn't used to someone challenging his dominance until he's paired with a fierce Slytherin for a project. (���)
potter!reader x remus secret relationship au (ft. jily) ✩ the beginning - How potter!reader and Remus end up together (❀) ✩ sirius scolds - When potter!reader and Remus aren't too careful about hiding their relationship, Sirius gives them a scolding... (𖤐) ✩ closed curtains and open doors -  Remus and potter!reader still aren’t careful enough in hiding their relationship from James (꩜𖤐) ✩ low waisted jeans - you don't realise you have bruises on your hips when putting on low waisted jeans, and your brother becomes protective over you (𖤐) ✩ the map - In which james gets suspicious about remus and his sister. marlene, sirius and lily cover up for them (𖤓𖤐) ✩ brief exposure - When James tries setting you and Remus up, Remus stirs up a lie to keep your secret safe for a little while longer (❀𖤐) ✩ a couple months later - Sirius finally reveals the truth to a knowing James (❀𖤓𖤐) ✩ two sides, one door - You go to James after Remus yells at you before a full moon (❀𖤓)
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ᴊᴀᴍᴇꜱ ᴘᴏᴛᴛᴇʀ
✩ how he reacts when you tell him you're in the mood (❀꩜)
✩ not drunk - In which reader is most definitely, not drunk (❀𖤐)
✩ jealousy, jealousy - You kiss Lucius to make James jealous since he was too slow at making the first move (𖤓)
✩ teaching James how to dance (𖤐)
✩ big, strong James Potter - James Potter is just a big softie with a praise kink and a girlfriend who feeds it (❀꩜)
✩ from now on - James gives you head for the first time and quickly gets addicted (❀꩜)
✩ lip combo - James watches you apply your lip combo and tries distracting you from your beloved lip gloss (❀𖤐)
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ꜱɪʀɪᴜꜱ ʙʟᴀᴄᴋ
✩ how he reacts when you're in the mood (꩜)
✩ when we were young - How Sirius and reader's relationship changed when she got sorted into slytherin and how they reconnected thanks to her current boyfriend. (꩜𖤓)
✩ the sniffles - Sirius takes care of gf!reader when she's sick (❀)
✩ ain't no sunshine when she's gone - Sirius can't help but be drawn to the young addition to the order of the Phoenix (❀꩜𖤓)
✩ fancy ride - Sirius gets jealous when you talk about your date with Evan so you put him in his place (❀꩜𖤓𖤐)
✩ productivity boost - When you offer to go for a walk to boost your productivity, Sirius decides he has better plans (❀꩜)
✩ love at first sight - lily's sister who goes to beauxbatons throws the party of the summer which sparks likely friendships, and an even likelier romance (❀)
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ʀᴇɢᴜʟᴜꜱ ʙʟᴀᴄᴋ
✩ (Not so) Friendly competition - Sirius asks out Reggie's best friend, and he is so bothered by it that he has to finally tell her how he feels (❀𖤓)
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ᴘᴏʟʏ!ᴍᴀʀᴀᴜᴅᴇʀꜱ
✩ necklace - The marauders love pulling on your new necklace to get your attention (❀𖤓)
✩ one of us - When the marauders find out you're an animagus, you're forced into the beginning of a friendship with them (❀𖤐)
✩ sirius's magazine - When sirius sneaks his porn magazine into james's backpack, it's almost inevitable for the boy to find it and caught a happy accident (꩜)
✩ come again? - A little blurb about the boys and reader with a thick accent! (❀𖤐)
✩ Sleeping beauty - reader stumbles into the common room after a long night of 'sleep'... the marauders try discovering who she spent the night with. (𖤐)
1 boyfriend, 3 perverts au! ✩ 1 boyfriend, 3 perverts - 'In which your bf loves giving you head... especially when he's high, and doesn't mind having friends around' (❀꩜) ✩ good manners - When your boyfriend's best friends barge into you having sex, you can't just say no to them (꩜𖤐)
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eu-nicola · 2 months ago
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not yours part 1
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summary: Rafe Cameron is the perfect boyfriend… but not yours, but Sofia’s. However, fate plays against you when you become the only person capable of understanding him in his darkest moments. What begins as a dangerous friendship soon becomes an attraction impossible to deny.
warnings: nothing for now
word counter: 9203
author’s note: english is not my first language
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In the eyes of the Kooks, you were always a Pogue. You could have perfectly coiffed hair, impeccable clothes, and an air of confidence that many of them envied, but no matter how hard you tried, you were still one of “the others.” After all, you were born and raised on the other side of the island, where the houses were small, the streets dusty, and the rules of etiquette didn’t exist. 
But that never stopped you. You always wanted more, you wanted to stand out, to shine as if the invisible line that divided the island didn’t exist for you. You liked being the center of attention, being the girl who walked into a party and made everyone turn to look at you. It was part of who you were. It entertained you, it filled you with energy. And maybe, deep down, you enjoyed a little bit of the scandal that a Pogue caused trying to be more than that. 
The first time you met Sofia was at one of those parties that the Kooks organized on the beach. You arrived late, as usual, but perfect. The tight black dress you had chosen highlighted every curve. You made sure every hair was in place and that your makeup highlighted your eyes impeccably.
You saw her alone, sitting in a corner, with a half-finished drink in her hand. She didn't seem comfortable in that place, as if she was out of place. Maybe that was what caught your attention. Unlike other girls, Sofia didn't seem to desperately want to fit in. There was something authentic about her, something that intrigued you.
"What are you doing here alone?" you asked her as you sat down next to her. Your tone was casual, as if you had known her all your life.
Sofia looked up and smiled at you, shy but warm.
"I don't know... I think this isn't my place."
"Well, sometimes, what we think isn't our place ends up being the best place of all," you answered, and without waiting for an invitation, you stayed there.
From that night on, you and Sofia became inseparable. She was quieter, more reserved, but that worked. Your explosive energy was complemented by her calm, and soon you were doing everything together: from afternoons on the beach to nighttime escapades to places where the Kooks didn’t dare to go.
It was inevitable that Sofia began to integrate more into your world. But she also began to enter theirs. Maybe too much.
The first time she told you she was dating Rafe Cameron, you felt like the world stopped for a moment.
“Rafe Cameron?” you repeated in disbelief as you looked in the mirror, touching up your eyeliner.
You were in your room, getting ready for another party. The air smelled of perfume and freshly opened makeup. Sofia was sitting on your bed, nervously playing with the hem of her dress.
“Yeah… I know he’s not exactly the kind of guy you like.”
He wasn’t. He never was. Rafe Cameron was the perfect definition of everything you despised about the Kooks. Arrogant, controlling, with that air of superiority that drove you crazy. And although you didn't say it openly, you knew he looked at you with disdain every time you coincided somewhere. As if you were usurping a space that didn't belong to you.
You took a deep breath, adjusting the necklace that adorned your neck, and decided not to say what you really thought.
“If it makes you happy… then fine.”
Sofia looked at you with a mix of relief and gratitude. You knew how much your opinion mattered to her, and you weren’t going to be the one to take that happiness away from her, even though something inside you told you it wasn’t going to end well.
Later that night the party was at its highest point. Music was booming from the speakers, laughter and conversations mixed with the sound of the sea gently lapping against the shore. The dim lights and strategically placed torches gave an almost magical air to the private beach where the Kooks were celebrating once again. Everything was perfect, at least in appearance.
You were there, as always, impeccable. Every accessory was in its place, every strand of your hair perfectly arranged, and your smile was as dazzling as ever.
But from the moment you walked through the door, Sofia was glued to Rafe Cameron.
He was leaning against one of the makeshift bars, a bottle of beer in his hand and that cocky grin he never seemed to be able to erase. Sofia, beside him, looked different. More radiant, perhaps, but also more… restrained. As if he somehow controlled her every move.
It bothered you. You couldn’t help it. You had arrived expecting to spend the night together, like you used to before Rafe came into the equation. But there she was, practically glued to him, laughing at his comments, looking at him as if the rest of the party didn’t exist.
You sipped a glass of white wine and forced yourself to smile when a couple of acquaintances came over to say hello. You chatted, laughed, and pretended you didn’t care. Because at the end of the day, you understood. He was her boyfriend. If you had one, you’d probably do the same. If you had a Rafe Cameron who looked at you like you were the only important thing in the world, you wouldn’t leave him alone either.
Still, you couldn’t help the pang of discomfort that settled in your chest every time you saw them together. It was like Sofia was slowly disappearing into Rafe’s shadow.
Someone offered you a drink, and you accepted with a flirtatious smile, because that was what you did. You always knew how to have fun, how to attract glances, how to make sure no one noticed that something was bothering you.
But as the night progressed, you realized that your eyes kept returning to them. To Rafe, who had his arm around her as if to make it clear that she belonged to him. To Sofia, who didn’t seem to notice anyone else.
“Are you going to stay there all night, or are you going to dance?” a boy’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. You turned around and recognized him by sight. A Kook, of course, one of those who always tried to get close to you when you were alone.
You smiled at him, playful.
“What if I tell you that I prefer to stay here?”
He laughed, but insisted.
“Come on, I promise you'll have fun.”
You hesitated for a second, your eyes looking back at Sofia. She was still glued to Rafe, oblivious to everything else.
“Okay” you finally agreed, putting your drink aside. “Let's see if it's true.”
You went out onto the dance floor and let yourself go. Because if there was one thing you knew how to do, it was enjoy the moment, at least in appearance. You danced, you laughed, you let the music envelop you. But every time you turned, every time you moved to the rhythm of the music, you could feel Rafe's gaze on you. It was a strange, uncomfortable feeling.
For an instant, your eyes met his. His gaze was intense, cold, as if he were evaluating you. It wasn't the first time he did it. He always seemed to observe you that way, as if he wanted to remind you that you didn't belong in his world, that you were nothing more than an intruder.
But you didn't give him the pleasure of looking away. You held his gaze, defiant, with a smile on your lips, as if you didn't care in the least what he thought. Because at the end of the day, if you had learned anything, it was not to show weakness.
The music continued, the lights continued to flicker, and the night continued.
When the music began to slow down and tiredness settled in your body, you decided that it was enough for that night. You had danced, drank, and smiled enough to keep up appearances. You looked once more to where Sofia and Rafe were, still together, as if the rest of the party didn't exist.
You sighed, resigned. It wasn't your place to interrupt that moment. You knew that if you came closer, Sofia would want you to stay, but honestly, you had no energy left to keep pretending that everything was fine.
"See you tomorrow," you murmured to a couple of acquaintances as you left. No one stopped you, because they knew that when you decided to leave, there was nothing that would make you change your mind.
You took the path to your house, enjoying the fresh air that calmed the heat accumulated on your skin. The silence of the night welcomed you with open arms, and it didn't take long for you to slip under the sheets, leaving behind the noise, the lights, and the discomfort that had followed you throughout the evening.
The next morning, your phone rang earlier than expected. Sofia.
"Good morning," you said hoarsely, still half asleep.
"Good morning," she answered, with an energy that made you frown. "Are you awake?"
“Now yes. What's up?”
“I'm at Rafe's house. I thought you could come. There's a pool, some food... We could spend the day here.”
You bit your lower lip, hesitating for a second. The idea of ​​spending the day at Rafe's house wasn't exactly your ideal plan. The Cameron house had always seemed more like a display of power than a home. Every corner was designed to impress, to make it clear that they were the pinnacle of the Kooks. And although you knew how to move in that environment, it wasn't your favorite place.
“Sure, give me some time to get ready and I'll go.”
“Perfect. I'll wait for you.”
You hung up the phone and stood up slowly, stretching your arms over your head as you thought about what to wear.
You opted for a long, light white dress, which highlighted your tan and fell perfectly. You chose a white bikini as well, simple but elegant. You made sure your hair was styled to perfection, letting some soft waves fall to frame your face.
A touch of natural makeup, just enough to highlight your eyes and lips, but not over the top. You chose a small bag, where you kept the essentials: sunscreen, sunglasses, and your phone.
You looked at yourself one last time in the mirror, adjusting the dress and the necklace that discreetly glistened on your collarbone.
You grabbed your keys, placed your sunglasses on your head, and left the house.
When you arrived, Sofia ran out to greet you before you could knock on the door, her radiant smile lighting up her face.
“You’re here!” she said excitedly, extending her arms towards you.
“Of course I do!” you replied with an equally wide smile as you walked over to hug her.
The hug was warm and genuine. Sofia had always had that energy that made you feel welcome, like everything else disappeared when you were together. She pulled away slightly to look at you.
“You look amazing.”
“You do too,” you said sincerely, noticing how her face glowed despite the simplicity of her outfit. “You always look good when you’re happy, though.”
Sofia blushed a little and laughed softly. You knew exactly why she was so happy. You didn’t have to be an expert at reading gestures to figure it out: Rafe.
“Come on, we’re in the back,” she said, taking you by the arm and leading you to the pool.
They walked through the house until they reached the spacious backyard. The pool sparkled in the sun, surrounded by lounge chairs, umbrellas, and luxurious furniture. Everything was perfectly arranged, as if they had taken the scene from a magazine.
And there he was.
He was sitting by the pool, a beer in his hand, sunglasses covering his eyes. He looked carefree, like the whole world revolved around him. His hair perfectly combed, body relaxed but always in control.
Your eyes met his for a brief second as you crossed the garden. His gaze was cold, distant, as always.
“Hi, Rafe,” you said in a polite tone, keeping the smile light.
He barely raised his hand in a vague greeting, not even bothering to take off his glasses.
“Hey.”
Nothing more. A short, dry greeting, as if you were there out of mere courtesy. Then, he turned his attention back to the conversation he was having with one of his friends, as if your presence was insignificant.
You expected it. Rafe had never treated you with more than minimal courtesy, and that was when he felt like it.
You took a deep breath and turned to Sofia, who didn’t seem to notice her boyfriend’s coldness.
“Come on, I’ll show you where to put your stuff,” Sofia said excitedly, leading you to one of the lounge chairs. 
After you put all your stuff down, Sofia spoke to you again. 
“Come on, let’s go to the pool,” Sofia said, pulling you by the hand. “It’s hot, and the water is perfect.”
You nodded and took off your white dress, revealing the bikini you had chosen so carefully. 
The afternoon passed more peacefully than you had anticipated. The sun bathed the pool in a golden glow, and the soft music coming from the strategically placed speakers made everything seem like something out of a postcard. You and Sofia spent hours laughing, swimming, and enjoying the cold drinks you had brought. At times, the awkwardness that had accompanied you upon arrival seemed to fade away. 
Rafe and his friends were nearby, but they kept their distance, busy in their own bubble of conversations. 
At some point, Sofia stood up. 
“I’m going inside to get something to eat.” Do you want me to get you something?
“No, I’m fine,” you replied with a smile. You didn’t want to move. The sun, the water, and the atmosphere had relaxed you more than you expected. Sofia gave you a quick smile before disappearing through the sliding door into the house.
You were left alone, enjoying the moment. The cold glass in your hand, the soft murmur of the water in the pool, and the warmth of the sun on your skin. You closed your eyes for a moment, letting the tranquility envelop you.
However, that calm was interrupted when you felt a slight tug on your hair. You frowned, opening your eyes. You had leaned against one of the umbrellas, and without realizing it, one of the fringes at the edge of the fabric had become entangled in your hair. You pulled gently, trying to free it, but it didn’t work. The lock of hair was still firmly caught.
You sighed, frustrated. Normally, Sofia would be there to help you in a second, but now she wasn't. You tried once more, this time with a little more force, but you only managed to get it more tangled.
"Perfect..." you murmured sarcastically, resigned to waiting for Sofia to return.
"Trouble?"
The male voice, low and slightly amused, startled you. Rafe.
He was a few steps away from you, with his hands in his pockets and that expression on his face that seemed to mix boredom with curiosity. He was watching you with those cold blue eyes that had always made you nervous, as if he was entertained by your little fight with the umbrella.
"Nothing I can't handle," you said quickly, trying to keep control. You didn't want to give him the pleasure of thinking you needed help. You gently tugged on the lock of hair again, but it still wouldn't come loose.
"Yeah, sure. You're handling it perfectly," he replied in a sarcastic tone, as he moved a little closer.
You looked at him, trying to keep your composure.
“Sofia will be here in a minute, don’t worry.”
Rafe raised an eyebrow, stopping right in front of you. The proximity made your skin crawl slightly.
“Or I can help you.”
For a moment, you were tempted to turn him down again. The idea of ​​accepting Rafe Cameron’s help was… strange. He wasn’t exactly the kind of person to selflessly offer help. But the reality was that Sofia would probably take a little longer, and you didn’t want to be stuck there anymore, humiliating yourself in front of him.
You sighed, reluctantly giving in.
“Okay… but don’t make it worse.”
“Trust me. I know what I’m doing.”
That’s exactly what worries me, you thought. But you didn’t say anything.
Rafe moved behind you, and you felt his hands move closer to your hair. His fingers were surprisingly deft and precise, touching just enough to untangle the trapped lock of hair. You were surprised by how gently he worked, without tugging or causing pain. His closeness was undeniable, and for an instant, you were aware of the warmth of his body, the faint scent of mint, and something else you couldn’t quite place.
“Almost…” he murmured as his fingers slid through the last knot. Finally, the lock of hair came free.
You pulled away slightly, turning to face him.
“Thank you.”
He simply nodded, wearing that neutral expression he always seemed to carry with him. Before he could say anything else, you pointed towards one of the lounge chairs.
“Can you pass me the brooch I left there?”
Rafe calmly walked over to the lounge chair, picked up the small white brooch, and handed it to you. There were no snide comments or haughty looks this time. It was strange.
“Thanks again,” you said as you pinned your hair back, trying to ignore the slight nervousness the interaction had left you with.
“You’re welcome.”
And that was it. No more words, no lingering stares. Rafe returned to his spot by the pool, as if nothing had happened. You stood there for a moment, trying to process what had just happened. There was something about his expression that didn’t fit with the image you had of him.
But you decided not to think about it too much.
Then the night came faster than you had expected. The party at the Camerons’ continued, but the atmosphere was much more relaxed. The pool lights created a soft glow over the water, reflecting the stars that were beginning to peek out in the night sky. You and Sofia retreated from the hustle and bustle of the party, looking for a respite.
“That was great, wasn’t it?” Sofia said, her voice filled with an energy that couldn’t be hidden.
You nodded as you walked over to one of the chairs near the pool, sitting down to enjoy the cool night air.
“Yeah, it was fun. Although, you know, always a little awkward with… some of the Kooks,” you replied, glancing sideways at Rafe, who was still talking to his friends in the distance.
Sofia laughed softly, as if those social tensions didn’t affect her as much as they did you. For her, being with Rafe was the most natural thing in the world.
“You’re staying, right?” Sofia asked, with an eager look, as if she needed to hear the affirmative answer.
You didn’t know what Sofia had in mind for the next day, but her excitement was contagious. You looked at Rafe from a distance, and although you didn’t say it out loud, you knew that if Sofia asked you for something, you would do it.
“Sure, why not?” “I want you to come with us tomorrow,” you replied, though a small spark of doubt lit up inside you. What exactly were they going to do the next day?
“Perfect,” Sofia said with a satisfied smile, as if she had achieved what she wanted. She then leaned slightly towards you, lowering her voice. “I want you to come with us tomorrow. Rafe is going to go racing on his motorcycle. He said he has no problem with you staying the night, if that’s okay with you. Would you like to join us tomorrow?”
You sat there thoughtfully for a moment. The idea of ​​spending another day with Rafe, back in his world of privilege, seemed strange to you. But it was also hard for you to say no to Sofia, especially when you saw how excited she was.
“Okay. What does it matter?” you replied, resigned to the idea of ​​spending the day with them.
The next morning came quickly, and the sun was already rising high when you woke up. The Cameron house was quiet at that hour, with most people still sleeping after the party the night before. When you checked your bag, you realized you didn't have anything suitable for what Sofia had proposed. The shorts and the t-shirt with the embroidery seemed like a comfortable option, but nothing too dressed up.
Sofia walked into the room you had stayed in, seeing that you were still getting organized.
"Are you ready?" she asked with her usual enthusiasm.
"Almost. I just... don't have anything to wear," you mentioned, looking at the clothes you had brought, a little out of place for a motorcycle ride.
"Don't worry!" Sofia said with a mischievous smile. "I'll lend you something. Those shorts are fine, you just need a comfortable t-shirt, right?"
Before you could answer, Sofia turned around and pulled a white t-shirt out of her closet. It wasn't anything over the top, but the edge of the t-shirt was adorned with small floral embroidery. Which might look plain, but it looked incredibly nice.
"Here, this should fit you well," she said as she handed you the t-shirt.
You looked at her, grateful, as you put it on. The fabric was soft and cool, something you needed for the morning heat. Then, you pulled on your shorts, arranged your hair the best way you could, and looked at yourself in the mirror.
When you left the room, Sofia was already ready, her hair perfectly coiffed and her energy bubbling.
“Let’s go!” she said, running towards the door. There was no way you could cope with her enthusiasm.
The two of you headed to the beach, where Rafe was already there, next to his bike. It was a sight in itself. Rafe’s bike, shiny and almost imposing looking, contrasted with his relaxed stance, as if the bike was an extension of him.
Rafe glanced at you briefly when you arrived, his expression somewhat unreadable.
The race began with a roar, and the feeling of speed on Rafe’s bike was electrifying. The wind whipped through your face as the sound of the engine mixed with the adrenaline in the air. Rafe was incredibly focused, and Sofia was smiling non-stop. 
As you continued down the road, you realized how skilled Rafe was. Every turn was taken with astonishing precision, and his ability to maneuver the bike quickly was evident. You and Sofia shared excited glances, both shouting words of encouragement, though you knew the real show was watching him. 
Finally, when the finish line was in sight, Rafe hit the gas. The bike roared as it took the final turn, and it wasn't long before he crossed the finish line with an undisputed victory. 
You and Sofia burst into cheers, though it was clear that Rafe's victory was what really mattered to her. She looked proud, and with good reason. Rafe had won in impeccable fashion, and the feeling of excitement was palpable.
Sofia stepped forward to hug him, while you stayed a step behind, observing the moment. Rafe's face reflected satisfaction. He didn't seem surprised by the victory, as if it was something expected.
You stared at Rafe for a moment, observing his relaxed face as he talked to Sofia about the race, but you quickly decided to leave those thoughts behind. There was something in his attitude that didn't quite fit, and you knew it wasn't worth wasting time on things that didn't make sense. The excitement of the day had already reached its peak, and you preferred to enjoy the moment.
You turned around, looking at Sofia, who had already begun to plan what they would do next.
"Let's celebrate!" Sofia said enthusiastically, interrupting your brief moment of introspection.
It wasn't an invitation, but an affirmation, and before you could respond, she had already taken you by the hand, gently pulling you towards where the others were. The celebratory atmosphere was in full swing: loud music, laughter, and an air of satisfaction permeating everything around them. When they arrived, everyone was there, enjoying Rafe's triumph, and even though you weren't part of that inner circle, you couldn't help but be swept up in the energy emanating from them. 
You sat next to Sofia on one of the lounge chairs by the pool, watching as people gathered around Rafe to congratulate him. The way he accepted the congratulations, calm and almost distant, seemed so natural to you, as if he was already used to being the center of attention. But something in you told you it wasn't that simple. There was an invisible barrier between you and him, as if the distance wasn't just physical, but emotional as well. 
But that night, you decided to let it be. You sat there, enjoying Sofia's company, and without thinking too much about it, you began to soak in the atmosphere. 
People started moving towards the dance floor, the music was getting livelier, and everyone seemed to be in a good mood. Sofia, still full of energy, looked at you with a knowing smile.
“Shall we dance?” she asked, without waiting for an answer, already getting up from the lounger.
You stood up after her, feeling that, at least for that night, you should enjoy yourself without thinking too much about anything else. Somehow, by surrounding yourself with the happiness of Sofia and the others, the feeling of awkwardness began to fade.
The day continued with a festive atmosphere, the music vibrating in the air. You and Sofia had completely let loose, laughing and dancing without a care, until suddenly Rafe approached her. On his face was a subtle smile, one of those smiles that you only see when someone has a deep connection with another person.
“Dance?” he said to Sofia, and she was quick to smile, her eyes shining.
You watched them as they glided to the center of the dance floor, their bodies moving to the beat of the music as if they were one. Something inside you, a mix of admiration and envy, stirred. There was something about the way Rafe looked after Sofia that made you think you might have misjudged him. After all, not everyone was willing to show that kind of tenderness in public. Maybe Rafe wasn't as cold as you had initially thought. 
You stared for a moment, but you didn't let yourself get caught up in those emotions. You decided not to think about it too much. Instead of just standing there watching, you let yourself go with the energy of the party and joined one of Rafe's friends who was nearby. He was outgoing and not afraid to chat, so the conversation flowed naturally. 
You laughed, you enjoyed yourself, and everything kept moving forward without your mind stopping on the images of Sofia and Rafe. But when you looked at yourself, you noticed something that worried you: the way that, with each encounter, you began to see more clearly how attentive Rafe and Sofia could be to each other. It wasn’t just a physical attraction, but something deeper, a connection you hadn’t anticipated. There was an understanding between them, something that seemed to flow effortlessly. And that, somehow, bothered you more than you wanted to admit.
Days passed, and as time went on, you started to see yourself closer and closer to them. Outings became common, and although at first you were a kind of guest in their circle, little by little you began to feel like you were part of it. You saw yourself walking along the beach with them, sharing laughs while watching Rafe throw out a sarcastic joke that made you laugh like never before. The atmosphere between the group was relaxed, fun, and you seemed to fit in perfectly. Almost as well as if you were one of the Kooks, as if you had always been part of that life. 
But something kept nagging at your head, a small knot in your stomach that kept growing. You realized that every time Rafe and Sofia looked at each other or subtly touched each other, a pang of jealousy ran through your body. How had you not noticed that before? How had you not seen how happy it made Sofia just to have him by her side? It was like a spark always surrounded them, and you wanted to be a part of that, of that security and affection that was evident on the surface.
You thought to yourself that maybe, just maybe, you had misjudged him. Rafe wasn't just the arrogant boy you had met at the beginning. There was something about his attitude towards Sofia that made you question everything you thought about him. You could see how he cared for her, how he took his time to make sure she was comfortable, how his eyes always looked for her in the middle of the crowd.
One afternoon, when everyone was on a terrace, and Rafe had approached to offer you a drink, you realized how much your perception of him had changed. There was a softness in his gaze, one you hadn't noticed before, and although it was something that confused you, you also admired it. You felt foolish for having kept yourself distant all this time, and a little jealous too, because deep down you knew you wanted something like that for yourself.
However, you just smiled and thanked him for the drink, not saying anything about what you were really thinking. It was easy to look at everything from the outside, but much harder to deal with what you felt on the inside. You were surrounded by friends, but the small discomfort you felt in your chest never completely went away. You wondered if you could ever be as lucky as Sofia, if you would ever find something that made you feel as alive and safe. 
That same day at night, after several hours of laughter, music, and drinks, the atmosphere at Rafe’s house was still lively. Sofia, as always, was in her element, enjoying the company of the two of you, but you already felt the energy starting to drain away. You had drunk more than you thought, and although it wasn’t enough to lose control, you did start to feel fatigue building up in your body. 
“I’m going to sleep,” you said to Sofia, who looked at you with a cheerful smile. 
“Sure, honey. The room is ready for you. Get some rest” he answered, still smiling.
You walked towards the stairs as you entered the halls of the house. It was a large and luxurious space, and the room you used when you stayed there was decorated with sophisticated details.
But before you reached the room, suddenly, you ran into Rafe. He was coming down the stairs, with a glass in his hand, apparently in a good mood, without the arrogant air he used to have. He stopped when he saw you and, as if he hadn't seen you coming, both of you collided a little. It was a strange moment: your body brushed against his, almost as if you were going to trip, but you managed to keep your balance with difficulty. However, what really made you feel uncomfortable was the look you exchanged. The air between the two of you became heavy for a moment, as if something had happened unintentionally.
Rafe, with a knowing smile on his face, was quick to let out a small laugh, as if he found the situation funny, and that only increased your discomfort. Your face instantly flushed, and for a second you thought you had gotten yourself into one of those awkward situations you always try to avoid.
“Wow, I didn’t see you coming,” he said, still with that carefree smile. His tone wasn’t mocking, but somehow his laugh felt like mockery.
Your mind raced and you didn’t know how to react, you just muttered something that didn’t make much sense, like an “I’m sorry” or an “excuse me,” and without thinking much, you rushed to the bedroom. The door closed behind you, and you instantly felt the awkwardness take over you. You lay down on the bed, covering your face with your hands and thinking about how you had handled the situation.
For a moment, you stood there, trying to calm your breathing, but Rafe's laughter still echoed in your head. You knew it hadn't been anything serious, but still, something about his attitude made you feel like you'd made a mistake by being so close to him. Why did it have that effect on you? The thought of being so close, in such a strange situation, didn't leave you calm.
In the end, you just sank into the comfort of the bed, trying to drown out the uncomfortable thoughts.
The next morning you woke up at dawn, although the sun hadn't yet reached its highest point. You felt a little disoriented at first, the echo of the laughter from the night before still echoing in your head, mixed with the feeling of discomfort that the encounter with Rafe had left you with. But, in the end, you got up the courage to get up and made yourself comfortable a little. You changed into something more comfortable but decent: a simple t-shirt and some shorts. You wanted to dress casually, but you also knew that it wasn't the time to be disheveled.
You walked down the stairs and headed towards the kitchen. The house was quiet, as if everyone was still deep in their rest after the night. You decided to sit in one of the chairs, looking at the soft lights that filtered through the window, observing the garden that stretched outside. Everything was so quiet that it brought you peace.
You were waiting for Sofia, you knew that she would soon appear, probably with a dazzling smile and something interesting to tell, but time passed and it wasn't her who appeared. Instead of Sofia, it was Rafe who entered the kitchen. At first you didn't notice him at all, but when you looked up, your eyes met his. He was still wearing the shirt he had worn the night before. Rafe looked at you with a slight smile, as if nothing strange had happened the night before.
"Good morning," he said, his voice low and calm.
You felt a knot in your stomach, and without thinking about it too much, shame washed over you again. You remembered what had happened the night before: the laughter, the unexpected shock, how uncomfortable you had felt. You blushed and, with a sigh, decided to talk about it, as a way to let go of what was weighing you down.
“Hey, Rafe... I'm sorry about last night,” you said quickly, not knowing if it was really necessary, but you needed to get those words out. You felt stupid for having created such silly tension, but you couldn't shake the feeling of discomfort anymore.
Rafe raised his eyebrows for a moment, as if he didn't understand why you were apologizing, but his expression quickly softened.
“You don't have to apologize,” he replied, smiling calmly. His tone was so relaxed that it reassured you, almost as if the situation hadn't been as awkward as you thought. “It was nothing.”
That, in a way, relieved you, although you still felt a little embarrassed inside. But what really surprised you was how you kept talking to him, as if all of that had never happened. Despite the initial awkwardness, something about his presence made you feel calmer. You realized how easy it was to talk to him. The words flowed naturally, without the nerves you had felt before. They talked about trivial things at first: the house, his life, they had even talked about what you had thought of him when Sofia said they were dating. 
The conversation slowly relaxed, without tension. You found yourself smiling more than you had planned, enjoying the talk without the awkwardness from before having room to grow. Rafe wasn't pressuring, he didn't make awkward comments, he just spoke with an ease that made you feel at peace, as if there were no expectations. 
A few minutes passed, or maybe more, and you were surprised by how much you were enjoying talking to him. You had never imagined that you would have such a relaxed conversation with someone like him.
You were about to make one more comment when Sofia finally appeared. She entered the kitchen with a big smile, clearly full of energy, as always.
“Good morning!” she exclaimed, approaching the table and hugging you immediately. “How was your night? Did you rest well?”
She and Rafe looked at each other for a moment, exchanging a knowing smile that made it obvious how comfortable they were together.
“Yes, everything is fine,” you said to Sofia, smiling. “Just resting.”
Sofia looked at you curiously, as if she felt there was something more between you and Rafe, but she didn’t say anything. The feeling of being there with them, as part of the group, grew stronger. It was strange how the dynamics of that house absorbed you little by little, even when you weren’t completely sure where you fit in.
A few days had passed since that conversation in the kitchen, and although the calm between you and Rafe remained, something in you urged you to step away a little. You didn't have a specific reason, you just felt the need to disconnect from it all. You had your own business to attend to, things you had put aside while enjoying the company of Sofia and the others.
Rafe's house, the parties, all of that was left in the background as you immersed yourself in your own thoughts. The days passed without you going near Rafe's or Sofia's house, without you seeing them or even caring about how they were spending their time. You kept yourself busy, focused on other things: personal tasks, things you had had to put off because you were caught up in the flow of the Kooks' social life. You found yourself returning to your routines.
It had been a while since you disconnected a little from everything. The need to return to your own space had faded, and now, at the end of those days of silence, something was urging you to return. You thought about Sofia and how, even though you had been away, you knew she was still your friend. The idea of ​​her now living with Rafe, as quickly as she had, seemed a little strange to you, but in the end, it was her life, her decisions. You decided it was time to go back, to meet them, although you didn't know exactly what to expect. 
Arriving at Rafe's house, the stillness in the air made you feel that something wasn't right. The door was ajar, and inside, there was an unusual calm. Everything was silent. You assumed that Sofia wouldn't be home; she had probably gone out. 
But as you moved towards the living room, you came across a scene you hadn't expected. Rafe was there, alone, in the center of the room. His posture tense, his hands shaking slightly. The first hint of something strange was that the phone in his hand was still in the air, dangling in his hand. It looked like he had received a call that had left him shaken. You could clearly see his labored breathing, his eyes scanning the room as if he was looking for something or someone, but at the same time as if he couldn't find it. The atmosphere in the house felt heavy, laden with something dark that you couldn't quite place.
You didn't know what to do. You didn't want to interrupt, but you couldn't just leave either. You assumed the call he'd received had left him in that state, though you weren't sure what it had been. The silence between the two of you was awkward, and as you thought about what to do, you cautiously approached.
You called his name.
"Rafe..." you said softly, trying not to startle him any more than he already was.
He glanced at you quickly, and his gaze, far from the arrogance he usually had, was filled with anxiety and some anger. His face was marked by a concern you hadn't seen before, and for a moment, he didn't seem like the Rafe Cameron you knew.
The tension in the air increased, and when he opened his mouth to speak, his voice sounded raspy, almost desperate.
"Go away!" he shouted, his tone a little higher than expected. The sound of his voice, so full of anxiety, made you take a step back, although, despite the sudden fear, something in you told you that you shouldn't leave.
You stood there, motionless for a moment, feeling your heart beating faster than normal. Rafe's panic was palpable, and the last thing you wanted to do was push him further. But, at the same time, you knew you couldn't just leave him like that.
"Rafe," you said, this time with a calmness that you didn't feel, but that you knew you needed for him to calm down. "I'm not going to leave."
His expression changed for a second, and he stared at you, as if trying to process what you had just said. A couple of seconds of tension filled the space between the two of you, but you didn't let him speak, taking advantage of the moment to move a little closer to him.
"It's okay, I understand that you don't feel well," you added, almost in a protective tone, although you said it without really knowing why. You didn’t know him as well as Sofia, but somehow, you cared for him more than you thought.
He took a deep breath, still shaken, and for a moment you thought you wouldn’t make it. But then, something in his gaze changed. His body, which was so stiff and tense, relaxed just a little, as if he was letting the words you had said reach him.
You moved a little closer, this time without him asking you to.
“How can I help you?” you asked softly. You knew that, in those moments, sometimes all you need is someone to be there, without pushing too hard.
Rafe looked at you a little confused, as if he wasn’t sure how to handle the situation, and then lowered his head, with a grimace of frustration.
“I don’t know…” he murmured, his voice still deep. “It’s just that… I got a call…”
You could see on his face that whatever had happened on that call had really affected him. You didn't say anything else, just waited for him to gather his thoughts, for him to feel ready to talk.
A few minutes passed in which the silence stretched out, and in that time, you were simply there, in the same room, giving him space, but showing him that you weren't willing to abandon him. Finally, he looked up, and in a low voice, he said:
“Thank you…”
You looked at him, and for the first time in a long time, you could see Rafe without the layer of arrogance and superiority that he always showed. You realized that, in that moment, he wasn't the self-assured boy that he had always been. He was just a person, vulnerable, dealing with something that he couldn't handle on his own.
You stayed with him as long as he needed, making sure that he wasn't alone in that moment. You didn't know what had happened with the call, or what was going to happen next, but a part of you understood something new about Rafe.
After that moment, something changed between you and Rafe, something that neither of you had anticipated. From that night on, you became the only person capable of understanding him in his darkest moments, without the need for words, without the typical facade of security that he used to have. What happened between you was something silent, almost imperceptible, but enough to leave a mark on both of you. 
At first, Rafe didn't admit it out loud, he didn't even make it clear in his gestures, but there was something in his behavior that was beginning to change. The days passed, and while Sofia continued to be busy with her things, you began to see a side of Rafe that you had never imagined. He became quieter, more introspective, but instead of the usual practical jokes and air of arrogance, there were now moments when he looked simply lost, as if you were the only one in the world who understood what he was really feeling. And you, somehow, began to understand it too.
There was something about the way he looked at you when his thoughts seemed to be beyond his control, when the shadows of his past or his problems came back to haunt him. There was something that told you not to judge him, something that urged you to stay calm and empathetic, even when the situation seemed out of place. Whenever he seemed on the verge of losing control, you knew what to do, how to approach him without making him feel vulnerable or weak. You knew when to step back and when to offer him your company without needing to talk too much. 
One afternoon, several days after that first meeting when you calmed him down, Rafe came home late, more undone than usual. He had had a fight with some of Sofia’s friends, and although no one in the house mentioned anything, you knew. It was as if everything he was trying to hide was crudely on display for you. When you entered the living room, he found you staring at the floor, shoulders slumped, and that expression only he could put on: a mix of repressed rage and deep sadness.
“Are you okay?” you asked softly, without pushing. You knew those words, though simple, could have more impact than you thought.
Rafe looked up, a little surprised by the calmness of your voice. Normally, he would have responded with a wry smile or a scathing comment, but instead, he looked at you and just said,
“I’m not.”
The tone was low, almost inaudible, as if he were revealing something he had never let slip before. You sat next to him without saying anything else, not forcing him to speak, but willing to stay there if he needed to vent. At that moment, you knew something had changed between the two of you.
The silence stretched out, but it wasn’t awkward. You knew Rafe didn’t need you to tell him what he should do or how he should feel. He just needed time, the space to be vulnerable without feeling judged, and in that space, you were the only one who could understand him. You didn’t need words to recognize the small gestures that betrayed him: the way his hand shook slightly or how his breathing quickened when something affected him too much. Those small details were what allowed you to see what others didn’t. 
As time went by, Rafe began to seek you out more often. Although he didn’t say it directly, you began to notice that there were times when he would simply approach you without a clear reason, without looking for a conversation, just so you would be close. On more than one occasion, he found you sitting on the couch, lost in your thoughts, and without saying anything, he sat next to you. No explanations were needed, because you both understood that just being together, without the need for words, was enough. 
There were days when he couldn’t hide what he felt, and without warning, the walls he had built around himself began to crumble. One day, after a particularly bad fight with Sofia, he came into the house, late at night. His face was tense, but there was something different about him. He didn’t yell, he didn’t hurl reproaches, but he just stood in the doorway, staring at you in silence, waiting for you to say something. And you did, you knew that what he needed was something that no one else gave him: reassurance.
“Do you want to talk about what happened?” you asked calmly, as you always did.
Rafe took a deep breath, letting the weight of his thoughts surround him for a moment. Finally, he slumped down on the couch, eyes closed, not wanting to show what he felt. But you knew. You knew that, even if he didn’t say it, he was seeking comfort, not in words, but in the way you looked at him, in how your actions offered him respite.
“Sometimes…” he said, in a whisper, while looking straight ahead, not really seeing you. “I feel like I'm alone, even when I'm surrounded by people.”
You didn't need to say anything else. You knew that what he had revealed wasn't something he wanted to share with many, but with you, he felt safe. Sometimes, just knowing that someone understood him gave him the comfort he so desperately needed.
That was the dynamic between you: you didn't need to always talk, or understand everything. You just needed to be there, to be the only one who, in his darkest moments, could offer him a soft light, without pressure, just letting time and space do their work. And in that silent understanding, you became the only person capable of understanding Rafe in his entirety, in his most fragile and dark moments, when no one else dared to enter.
Despite everything you shared with Rafe, there was something inside you that you couldn't ignore. A desire, an attraction that, even though you tried to hide it, kept emerging with every gesture, with every word he said to you in those moments when his guard was down. You found yourself watching him more than you should have, noticing the little details that had previously gone unnoticed: how the light played in his hair, the way he laughed, or how his tone of voice changed when he was relaxed, when he felt like he didn’t have to be the same old Rafe, the one everyone admired or feared. 
At first, you tried to ignore it. You said it was just the closeness, the way things had developed between the three of you, and that it was a passing phase. But it wasn’t just that. Every time he smiled at you or looked at you in a warmer way, you felt a tug in your chest that you couldn’t control. There was something else in you that was building, something that terrified you. 
You thought about Sofia, how happy she was with him, how much she had supported you in everything, and it tormented you to feel what you felt for Rafe. You felt guilty, like you were betraying a friendship you had cared for for so long. She didn’t deserve that, you thought. Sofia had always been loyal, fun, and even though she could be impulsive and a little blind at times, you saw her happy, devoted to Rafe, trusting him in a way you never could.
There were times when, after talking to Rafe, you were left alone, with thoughts running wild in your mind. You couldn’t stop thinking about him, about the way he made you feel special, about how his closeness disarmed you, how there was something in his fragility that attracted you, a side that no one else saw, but you did. You felt at a crossroads, trapped between what you felt and what you knew you couldn’t do.
It wasn’t just a physical attraction, it was something deeper. Something that made you want to hold him longer than a friend should. Something that asked you to be there for him in a way that went beyond friendship. It was the desire to be close to him, to take care of him, to become his refuge, and it terrified you how much you loved him without being able to control it. 
At first, you tried to suppress it. Every time you felt that need to be closer to him, to share more moments, you tried to convince yourself that it was just a phase, that it was because of the closeness of the last few months. But the more you denied it, the stronger that feeling became inside you, like it was an undercurrent that grew every time he looked at you with those dark, intense eyes. Those eyes that disarmed you, that seemed to see beyond your facade, beyond your friendship. 
Sometimes, you felt like you were walking on a tightrope. You knew that every moment you spent with Rafe, every conversation, every gesture, brought you closer to something you couldn't allow yourself. But you couldn't help it. The desire, the attraction, everything you felt for him, was growing inside you, and no matter how many times you told yourself it was a betrayal, that you should stay away, you couldn't stop thinking about what happened when he was around.
Every time Sofia left, every time Rafe was left alone with you, that feeling grew stronger, as if the air between the two of you became thick and charged with something neither of you dared to mention. It scared you, it made you uncomfortable, but you couldn't stop it.
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stackslip · 2 months ago
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I wanna ask what’s going on with arcane but I feel like I’m opening pandora’s box 😅
the thing about arcane s1's writing, is that every plot beat flowed naturally from characters' choices, and every one of the characters' choices made sense in the context of who that character was, where they came from and what information they are working with at the time they make that decision. it felt like a tightly written tragedy where on a rewatch, it all feels completely inevitable that things would end this way because it made sense to who we learned these characters were. and said characters were layered, much time was devoted to giving them a certain degree of depth and believability (bar cait). you can criticize other aspects of s1's writing such as liberal wishwashiness but s1 of arcane was a *good* tragedy with a genuinely compelling cast! the final scene of the show is a confrontation between three major players who were all working with different information and whose motivations are completely at odds but who have a deeply personal tie, it's about jinx as the end result of the zaun-piltover conflict, it's about vi and silco being two deeply broken people who see her in an idealized version they deeply love and want her to remain this static thing they can be comfortable with until it turns out she can't be and she shatters and at the same time irreversably destroys her relationship to both, leading her in her despair to set off the ticking time bomb that is piltover and zaun's inevitable conflict!
so like, s1 has its flaws but its finale imo was perfect and made the whole thing self contained. i was ok with s2 happening. the only thing i wanted was more the dynamic character writing. i expected wishy washy politcs. and act 1 of s2 already struggled with character, but at least the plot beats were interesting and while not earned, made sense according to the characters we'd left in s1.
s2 act 2 is an absolute catastrophe, even compared to the previous act, nevermind compared to s1. it's not just that the plot beats don't feel earned, it's not just that it's missing connective tissue between them--it's that all the most interesting conflicts and dynamics just cease to exist. they don't get "resolved", they either are completely forgotten or are just waved away magically to pave the way for an utterly stupid, shlocky, wannabe shock value emotional final ten minutes of episode 6 that is honestly infuriating in how it's trying to push you to have feelings about it. i don't have any feelings besides revulsion and bafflement frankly. even before these final ten minutes of ep 6, the sheer lack of buildup or of character moments, the way characters are basically willed by the plot to be there at specific points for plot to happen to them instead of them arriving at it naturally--the way it reframes interesting aspects of s1 and s2 act 1 into shlocky, tropey bullshit--it's honestly near mesmerizing? it's like they brought in whole different new writers specifically for this who decided to back down on ANYTHING the show did that was interesting to try to instead push to the league's status quo instead, no matter how little sense it makes. i'm almost in awe. how do you mess up so badly.
this isn't just like, the plot is rushed and we need to get there as fast as possible--none of these resolutions make SENSE. jinx and vi's relationship was the core of season one, and suddenly magically jinx shows up at vi's door and vi bitches a little and then they go hunt vander down together and then they all hug because he was their father too <333 isha. i'm supposed to have emotions about isha? she sacrifices herself for.... forwhat? what? why? it's like they knew they had to kill her off to give jinx feelings and do so in the most stupid and absurd way possible, i was laughing hysterically when the music came in. it was so blatantly manipulative and uncalled for. ok i guess! sevika helps jinx and then once she's served her plot purpose she just vanishes! doesn't she wanna meet vander??? ekko's disappearance doesn't both people much i guess even his own firelights. ambessa says a single line about mel disappearing, and can i say i'm kinda infuriated that two out of three of the main black characters are just locked away from the plot and main cast for a large period of time. jayce--i guess they'll give us an explanation as to why but here it's like he just...... shows up angry and "ruins" things and that's it. whatever there was to ruin lmfao sky and viktor's heterosexuality mind palace leading to him being cyborg satan or some shit? cait finally FINALLY gets some personality, something interesting to her, she is openly a reactionary fascist who gassed half the undercity to sniff out jinx, and then she meets vi and within a solid minute is now back to being Nice and helping out jinx. i guess. silco and vander's backstory kind of completely destroys a lot of the stuff that made vander and silco's relationship to vi and jinx interesting and goes for a Family Is 5ever approach i guess.
just. i don't think there's a single thing there that's redeemable or interesting. it's comically bad. vi has no personality or motivation. she just does things. she got an emo trauma amv so that we get that she's sad but it might as well not have happened bc she barely is a character. jinx is a sad manic pixie dream girl. her psychosis is gone or barely there now apparently. sevika is plot and then vanishes when her part is done. ambessa is not a mastermind as act 1 hinted at but the most stupid comical villain alive. mel is--is she just going to come back to do a big plot thing in act 3 and then that's it? ekko the same? we have no idea what jayce is even doing or what or why. piltover and zaun are gonna ally now i guess lol. ok sure why not. why anything. why do anything at all! what's the point!
it's funny bc i was willing to give this season a chance despite act 1 being so rushed bc again, the plot points were interesting and while the characters needed more time fleshed out for their decisions to make sense i COULD see the characters making these choices and it was just a question of missing buildup. here it's like everyone is a zombie of their actual self. there's no point to anything. it's so stupid. it tries hard to play the emotion part but why should i feel any emotion except befuddlement? why are caitvi shippers happy? i'd be insulted. i feel insulted. i heard via a friend that riot had intervened in the writing more and so far i hadn't felt it but now i'm wondering if that's not exactly what happened bc it genuinely feels like the writers were fired right after act 1. what the fuck lol. i don't think i even wanna watch act 3 after this, i feel genuinely insulted that i should be expected to think this is the same show as s1 or that i should feel any kind of positive feelings about it. fuck this show so bad lmfao i'm sticking to s1 and pretending nothing happened after it. maybe grabbing some act 1 plot points for fun and that's it. it's so bad
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vettelsvee · 3 days ago
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Hello! I hope this is the correct way to request..., can you write a lewis story for prompt 28? It can be something like, reader is a new wag and there is some online hate, and lewis comforts them. It's completely fine if you don't wanna do this story, Thank you!! 💞
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DON'T LET THEM SAY THAT. YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL | Lewis Hamilton
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Lewis Hamilton x Actress!Reader
SUMMARY: Lewis and you decided to make your relationship public in Maranello before 2025 Formula 1 season starts. However, love from fans isn't there as you expected ↳ REQUESTED: Part of VEE'S F1 PROMPTS LIST (VOL. I)! Feel free to request anything you want <3 Hope you liked it anon! 💖
WORD COUNT: 2043
WARNINGS: Age gap (reader is on her early 20s and Lewis is 40), fans acting like crazy, hate towards Y/N
VEE'S NOTES: I received this prompt on the inbox today and I don't know how I wrote, corrected, translated and corrected once again it today. Also, first ever Ferrari!Lewis fic I'm so emotional right now. Not really happy with the result since like Y/N in this fic, I have many intrusive thoughts about my writing and I didn't have the best of the weekends, but hope you enjoy it anyways! Remember that I appreciate your comments, feedback, as well as reblogs, thank you so much! :)
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© VETTELSVEE (2025). please, do not steal, copy or translate my works. thanks for reading!
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The whirlwind of emotions you’ve experienced since your relationship with Lewis Hamilton became public has been unimaginable... and that’s putting it lightly.  
Although you were somewhat used to the spotlight thanks to your rising career as an actress, flashes from cameras, crowds shouting for you to turn around so they could get a picture, and the occasional fan asking for a photo or autograph, the world of Formula 1 was completely new to you.  
You couldn’t deny that you were unhappy with how drastically your life had changed. The man who had just joined Scuderia Ferrari had become everything you had ever imagined in a partner. kind, undeniably caring, and, most importantly, empathetic enough to understand how overwhelming this sudden rise in fame was for you.  
Lewis had noticed how down you’d been ever since he decided to post those photos of you both in Maranello. You had both agreed to go together so he could test one of those legendary red cars for the first time, fully aware that people would inevitably start talking. That day, you decided to make your relationship public after keeping it a secret for about six months, agreeing that it was best to do so before the 2025 season began.  
Despite it all, despite how much you had started closing yourself off in the following weeks, Lewis remained by your side, making you feel like the most important person in the world. But it was becoming increasingly difficult for him, especially when all you did was act like everything was fine on the outside while you were slowly destroying yourself inside.  
The nightmare began with small comments on the photo Lewis had uploaded to Instagram, just you, posing timidly in front of the Ferrari while he held you around the waist, smiling like never before. At first, the comments didn’t seem like a big deal, with people just wanting to know more about your relationship or if it was serious. But soon, the messages started pouring in, insults and threats far worse than you had ever imagined, many of them coming from underage girls. Eventually, you had to disable comments on every single one of your photos, no matter how old they were.
However, what truly became a living nightmare for you were the Twitter threads and, especially, the accounts dedicated exclusively to Formula 1 wags. They were relentless, tearing you apart, analyzing your every move as if dating one of the 20 drivers on the grid was equivalent to committing first-degree murder.
“She’s just looking for fame now that her acting career is taking off.”
“She doesn’t deserve someone like Lewis.”
“She’s too young for him.”
“And let’s not even talk about how ugly she is… have you seen her?”
You sighed, throwing your phone onto the couch with such force that it ended up crashing onto the floor. But you didn’t even bother to check if it was broken. You had promised yourself you wouldn’t read any more comments, wouldn’t even open your Instagram account, yet you couldn’t resist. After all, you were human, and the weight of it all was becoming too much to bear, even more than you were willing to admit to Lewis, to whom you hadn’t fully opened up yet.
The hotel room in Tokyo, where you and Lewis had decided to stay for one of your last vacations before the season began, fell into complete silence. The only sound that filled the space was your muffled sobs.
“And who even is she? Nobody knows her.”
“Lewis deserves someone better, that’s for sure.”
Tears welled up in your eyes, spilling down your cheeks faster than you could wipe them away.
You couldn’t understand it. It felt so unfair... Why were you being treated this way just for loving someone? Why did people throw venomous words at you without even knowing you, without even trying to? Did being a fan of Lewis automatically mean they had to hate you?
You tried to relax, to break free from the spiral of thoughts that only led you to overthink, but it was impossible. Once your mind started down that path, the only thing it knew how to do was tear you apart from the inside.
As you tried to steady your breathing and quickly wiped away your tears, a knock echoed at the door.
You pulled yourself together as fast as you could, forcing a smile while glancing at your reflection in the mirror. You swore to yourself that you’d do everything possible to pretend that everything was fine, that you were fine.
But the moment you opened the door and saw Lewis, drenched in sweat from his gym session and pulling out his earbuds, you immediately turned around and rushed into the nearest room, the bathroom, locking yourself inside to keep him from seeing you like this.
“Come on, Y/N...”
Lewis knew you too well by now. No matter how hard you tried to convince him otherwise, he could see right through you, he knew you were struggling, and struggling pretty badly.
He didn’t do anything at first. He didn’t know what to do. He was afraid that whatever he said or did might only make things worse, might make you shut down even more. Instead, he rested his forehead against the closed door, feeling defeated, thinking of ways to make you feel worthy enough to stop torturing yourself over what strangers were saying online, people who knew nothing about your relationship and even less about you.
Eventually, you decided to come out. Lewis saw you, completely defeated, and he cursed himself for letting things get to this point. What had he done wrong to make you feel this way? God, you were just a girl in your early twenties who had recently made the leap to Hollywood stardom after moving to Los Angeles at sixteen, waiting tables in a run-down bar, and facing countless failed auditions until you finally landed the role that changed everything.
“Hey, love,” Lewis spoke as gently as possible, his eyes scanning your red-rimmed ones and your tangled hair. “What’s wrong?”
He knew exactly what was wrong, but he wanted you to be the one to speak, to let it all out.
You took a deep breath and pointed at your phone, still lying on the floor. A nervous knot tightened in your stomach, and your hands began to fidget anxiously. As if on cue, tears started streaming down your face once more.
“I just… I don’t understand why they have to be like this. What did I do to deserve this? Am I not good enough? Not pretty enough for you?”
Lewis sighed. He had known from the beginning that not everyone would accept your relationship, but the amount of hate you were facing was beyond excessive. He was exhausted by the senseless comments and social media accounts created solely to spew hate at you. And even more, he was tired of becoming tabloid fodder, followed everywhere by paparazzi eager to capture any moment they could.
Seeing you like this hurt him in ways he couldn’t even describe, and it made him feel miserable.
“Hey, Y/N… look at me.”
Despite speaking to you firmly and holding your hand, gently rubbing your skin with his thumb to calm you down, you didn’t respond. Lewis then cupped your chin delicately, forcing you to look at him.
“I know I’ve told you this a thousand times, and I also know that with how stubborn you are, you probably won’t listen to me, but don’t let what they say about you bother you,” he wanted to say, but all he really cared about was you. “What matters is that I love you, okay?”
“But... why does it have to affect me? Why did I used to not care about anything, and now I care so much about the opinion of strangers?” you asked, hesitantly, biting your lip in an attempt to relax.
Lewis moved even closer to you, wrapping his arms around you. He hated seeing you like this, especially when before all of this started, you were a light in his life, and it was him who used to lean on you when race weekends got overwhelming.
“Because you’re human, babe,” he replied, pressing a kiss to your forehead and holding you tighter. “Even though we sometimes say the opposite, we all care about what others think of us, especially when all they want to do is bring us down.”
“But... what if they’re right? What if I’m not what you deserve?”
“Do I need to remind you again that they’re wrong?” Lewis said, pulling you slightly away so your gazes met. “You need to remember how much you mean to me, but more than that, you need to remember who you are and all that you’re worth. That’s all that matters.”
You didn’t say anything else. Instead, you buried your face in his chest, once again crying quietly to avoid him seeing you like this.
“I’m ugly, Lew. Really ugly,” you confessed without lifting your head. “I don’t even know how you love me, or how you agreed to be with me after all those months we spent talking and hanging out as friends, or…”
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t let them say that. You’re beautiful. You’re beautiful, and you’ve always been, alright? Anyone who says otherwise needs to get their eyes checked.”
You laughed, and Lewis felt that as a small victory.
You closed your eyes, trying to calm yourself down. For the first time in a long while, you pushed aside the intrusive thoughts, the destructive comments you saw daily on social media, and allowed yourself the luxury of, for just a moment, trying to stop torturing yourself and accepting that there were things you couldn’t change.
Lewis’s words, while brief and somewhat familiar to you, brought a peace you hadn’t felt in days. You did your best to let the tension in your shoulders melt away, slowly separating from him and moving your arms bit by bit.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you, Lew,” you whispered, once again wrapping your arms around his waist, wishing you could never let go of him.
“You don’t have to worry about that,” Lewis chuckled, planting kisses on your forehead. “I’m never going to leave you, and I hope you’ll never leave me either.”
Neither of you said anything more. Your bodies remained close, exchanging shy kisses, making promises that everything would get better as you both talked about the changes you’d face in 2025. That was enough for you both to know things were going to be okay.
You both understood that the big, risky changes you were taking, especially your relationship, were going to be difficult, just like what was happening with you and the wave of hate you were receiving. But once you stopped giving it too much importance, or rather, no importance at all, no one would stop you as the newest couple in Formula 1.
“Hey, listen to me, please... I’ve been thinking about something.”
Lewis’s words caught your attention as you were starting to drift off to sleep in bed. You straightened up, your hand still intertwined with his.
“How about we take a walk, and you can get to know the city a bit?” he suggested. “You know… we could go eat out, hit up an arcade, or maybe…”
“Can you get me a stuffed animal from one of those weird claw machines?!” you interrupted him, excited, which made Lewis burst out laughing.
“Of course, I can get you a stuffed animal, or buy you all the ones you want.”
You smiled, and as Lewis went to the bathroom for a shower, you began to prepare for the day. That moment was exactly when you realized you needed to trust yourself more and, specially, just as Lewis valued you. Because if there was one thing you’d learned from him in the short time you’d been together, it was that, no matter what you did, you’d always be the envy of others, so you just needed to remind yourself that you didn’t need to feel worse for living the life you’d always dreamed of and, moreover, you worked hard to have.
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hotheadedhero · 9 months ago
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Now hear me out-
Bayverse turtles giving reader a spiderman kiss. Like maybe the turtles haven't seen their beloved significant other for a while and decide to sneak away from patrol for a split second to give them an upside down smooch.
💜
AN: Hearing you loud and clear my lovely, this is frickin adorable, thank you! Big spiderman fan over here <3 Hope you weren't waiting too long, even being on holiday wasn't going to stop me finishing this 👀
Kiss me
Bay Turtles x Reader
Leonardo
You are in the middle of reading on your couch when there’s knocking at your window. A set of rhythmic taps that play out in a particular pattern. A secret code indicative of who is waiting outside your living room. With a joyous grin, you spring up onto your feet and pull the curtains open. You expected to see your boyfriend outside but you did not expect him to be hanging upside down from your upstairs neighbour's part of the fire escape. Given the fact that yours is currently classed as unsafe to use, this makes a lot more sense.
The set of circumstances that led to such a problem is not your fault. Whoever had lived here prior, assumed it would be a great idea to place a blow-up paddling pool on it for those dreadfully hot summers. The funny thing about chlorine water, however, is that chlorine water accelerates the corrosion of metals. Much to your derisive luck, it didn’t start taking effect until a few months after you had moved in. Without any substantial evidence, the blame is being passed over to you and that is not a bill you have the funds to meet. Hence, you are awaiting a hearing and, hopefully, following approval to get it fixed without burning a said hole in your pocket. Landlords, am I right?
You open the window for Leonardo. “I see you came to hang out,” you quip before smiling awkwardly. “Sorry about the broken fire escape.”
He shakes his head, knowing that you should be the last person apologising for it, but decides to make light of the situation with his own humour. "You may want to look into that."
"If you got a spare grand or two lying around," you joke in return, "I'd be happy to."
Leo breathes a quiet laugh and puckers his lips. Figures that he would only have time for a quick greeting, so you may as well make it worthwhile when you have the chance. Happily, you comply and lean forward for a kiss. You smile into it and, in doing so, you feel him do the same. It can be hard to find the time for small moments such as is but they are always cherished.
"Now go keep us safe,” you mumble against his lips. “I’ll come by the lair when you’re done.”
One last kiss is exchanged, trying to savour it as best you can, before he inevitably has to disappear into the night again.
Raphael
Sometimes dating can be a whirlwind of mystery and uncertainties: days where one wonders if such a thing is tenable. Raphael knew your relationship would come with certain hurdles - albeit this isn't the worst it could be - but he didn't think you'd go this long without seeing each other. With you working during the day and him the night, planning time together is a challenge. For the quieter nights, you’re usually too tired from your job. There’s the occasional drop-in on your days off but it’s a similar problem what with him needing sleep, too. Not now, though. The frustration is settled thickly into his skin. Perhaps that’s why he’s working so hard on his crunches. Replace the mental burn with a physical one.
Deciding to turn up the burn, he lifts himself onto his pull-up bar, hooks his knees over it, and resumes working on his core. Raph gets close to a hundred reps before he hears the rapid pitter of feet coming straight for the lair. He prepares to descend to the ground and greet you but you rush into his gym and grab his face before he gets the chance.
"Just wanted to drop by quick," you sputter feverishly before smacking your mouth into his. "Can't stay long."
Then you kiss him again; a long, deep, and tender press of your lips upon his. He falls into it enough that the raw emotion is clear but not so much that he slips from the pull-up bar. The fact that you’ve hurried in before your shift just to give him some quick love means the world to this big lug. He should think about missing you more often if it means the universe will summon you to him. One hand outstretches to pull your head closer but you move away just as he's about to. Damn.
Sprinting off, you shout out a last, "Love you," before disappearing off into one of the many sewer tunnels.
He just hangs there gaunt, blinking for the after-image of you that is now completely gone. Had he not been taken so sharply off guard, he probably would have made a grab for you, insisting that you call in sick and stay. In a perfect world, maybe. A short huff of amusement blows out of his nostrils and he returns to his workout, now fueled with a new, more desirable burn.
With a smirk and underlays of that soft smile you coax out of him, he whispers under his breath, “Love you, too.”
Donatello
As far as work days go, this one has been a doozy and getting back home couldn’t possibly be a more sweet reward. There aren’t many floors to climb but you’re so tired that you opt to use the lift instead of the stairs; a little self-treat and a decision that you quickly regret when it comes to a halt. Your poor, weary body jostles with the force of it stopping abruptly and you whine. Please, don’t do this. After the day you’ve had, this is the last thing you need.
Just when you think it can’t possibly get any worse, there’s a thud from right above your head. Bandits? Burglary? A raid? All stupid ideas in the grand scheme of things but panic is leading you to such irrational thoughts. With your rucksack as your only defence, you hold it up ready to bring a smackdown if needs be. Clanging. Creaking. Weight shifting. Then, the ceiling’s latch falls and down comes a head.
“Mind if I drop by?” your turtle boyfriend asks as he hangs all topsy-turvy in front of you.
“Oh, thank Mercury, it’s you,” you heave, letting your bag drop to place a hand on your chest. The prior anxiety wears off just enough for a new one to beckon and you straighten up. “Wait, the security cams-”
“Already taken care of,” he reassures with a weirdly cheeky grin. “How’s this for some spontaneous romance?”
Slowly, your face pinches and points up at Donnie, not overly impressed with what’s insinuated here. So, this was all curated by him, was it? Possibly a cute plan from his perspective but you’re much too drained to see it that way.
You rub your eyes with your thumb and finger and sigh. “I wouldn’t consider giving me a near damn heart attack romantic, Don.”
“Would it be considered somewhat romantic if I were to say that I also reset and upgraded your lift system? It shouldn’t malfunction for another 5 years now.”
Knowing he’d find a way to have a sweet reason for this, you can hardly hold back your smile. It’s a bit out there but you also have to remind yourself of who you’re dating. You sigh again, this time in fake disdain, and lean off the wall to kiss him. Judging by the little hum in his throat, he must be feeling pretty proud of himself. When you pull away, you adjust his slightly crooked glasses.
“The best thing you could do right now is let me get to my apartment,” you note with a pat on his cheek. “Please?”
His eyes light up and he disappears back up from whence he came to get things running. Getting back home may have been trickier than you anticipated but it isn’t without its perks for being able to see Donnie. A conversation may need to be had about his choices of flirtatious spontaneity, however.
Michelangelo
In the late hours of the evening, you had decided to start settling down for the night. The typical, run-of-the-mill routine: brush your teeth, wash your face, and get into some cosy pyjamas. A nice movie sounds like a good idea before you hit the hay. You leave the bathroom to get a start on choosing one when you remark something in the air. It isn’t clear but there is an unspecified something different with your apartment since you’ve been in the bathroom. A smell? Or perhaps a few objects that now appear to be out of place. There wasn’t any noise to indicate a new presence. Ah. You know exactly what’s going on. Keeping back a laugh, you place your hand on your hips.
“I know you’re up there, Mikey,” you say, not even bothering to look up at your intruder.
“Aw, babe,” he whines from the ceiling as he lets the upper half of his body fall and hang limply in front of you. “Ruining the moment here.”
These types of hijinks may have pulled a fast one over you back in the day but you’ve grown more than accustomed to them by now, much to your boyfriend’s dismay. He isn’t inherently set on scaring your socks off - as much as that is a bonus - but he likes surprising you, seeing the sparkle in your eyes when you realise it’s him. He looks like a bit of a wounded puppy for the fact, so it only seems fair that you perk him back up again. Playfully rolling your eyes, you take a few steps forward and kiss him sweetly. It’s safe to say that this is much better than getting you all frightened. Regardless of that, you have to quietly question how he’s managed to find the time to come and attempt a prank at your expense in the first place.
“Mikey,” you hear one of his brothers yell from outside, “Don’s picked up on a burglary from the police scanners. We gotta go. Now!”
That answers that, then.
“Duty calls, angel,” he breathes out, clearly bummed out but feigning it against his lax grin. “You know how it is.”
Sensing his disappointment, you peck his lips again and grin encouragingly. “Go get ‘em, hero.”
He shoots you a wink and lets himself drop to the floor before jumping out of your window. You watch him bound off over rooftops, hollering and likely getting an ear chewed off by his brothers. Mikey hates to leave his sweetness behind but you know just what to say to get him fired up. Those thugs shall endure a swift beat down, so he can return for his “hero’s reward” quickly.
If you liked this, there's a real neat one by @theyhavetakenovermylife with the 2012 boyos with the same concept! (and also you just have to check out all of their works, they're amazing 🙏😭💕)
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ramblingautisticman · 2 months ago
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(Okay, for some reason, the repost where I was talking about this just...disapeard?? So here I go. Again. I'm just going to post it as a separate thing.)
(Also, Warning, talking about child hood cancer, experimentation and torture, and the other general dark Logan or Wade things.)
Okay! So- obviously, with the timeline, it wouldn't work- but I can just change that because why not?
Imagine Wade being diagnosed with cancer at 8. He has chemo and some surgeries, then for a good 2 years he is cancer free. Of course, though, it comes back at around 11. There isn't anything they can do this time, though. The surgeries won't work, and chemo will only prolong the inevitable, so Wade has to accept his fate. His parents get approached by someone who promises to cure Wade, though. All they need to do is sign over their legal rights in regards to him, so that's what they do. Sure, they cured him, but only after years of being tortured and experimented on. Wade thinks his parents didn't know at the beginning, but after the first few months, he started to question if they knew what this place was. His parents had never been kind people, and Wade quickly decided his parents probably didn't care what happened when they signed that waver. He survives, though. He gets his mutation, and eventually, the X-Men manages to find the facility that has been doing this. He's glad all of the other kids have been saved and most of them reunited with their parents- he had looked after half of them in that hell hole so he feels responsible for making sure they are all save wherever they go- and he goes back to the school with the other kids who don't have a home to go back to or just don't want to go back home. It's weird to be a whole 17 years of age and not knowing how to function in the world. He knows how to survive, but that's about it. So, it's a struggle to settle into the mansion at first, but he quickly takes on the role of bigger brother to the younger kids. And yeah, he finds it hard to interact with the people his own age, too terrified to deal with the possible riddicule of how he looks.
Logan's been there awhile. He was found by the Professor after a few news articles popped up about some 'strange deaths' and he had investigated. No one at the school knows much about him- they know he lived in the woods for a year when he was 13, and that the Professor found him- but that's about it. Practically all the students avoid him like the plague in the halls and at meal times. It's not that Logan tries to talk to the others anyway, and he doesn't really want too. He's used to being a lone wolf. He keeps to himself, doesn't want to deal with others shit, and he plans to keep it that way. He's gonna leave this place as soon as he is 18 next year. He isn't even sure where he would go, but he refuses to join the X-Men. He can't bring himself too- to many accidents with the claws and panic attacks to be able to help people.
Naturally, Wade decides that Logan is the person he is going to befriend. Even if the idea of being judged terrifies him, he can't help but be interested in the quiet brooding bad boy.
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twstowo · 1 year ago
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hi hi, i saw your ask box was open so i decided to submit a request!
i'd like to ask for the basketball club (ace, jamil, floyd, separately btw) with a reader who is a sleepy person? reader sleeps through classes sometimes and takes almost any opportunity to nap and enjoys using the boys as a pillow ^_^
thank you so much, and take your time !!
˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗SYNOPSIS: How they deal with a sleepy reader
♡︎I’m buying a Jamil body pillow
♡︎Includes: Ace, Jamil and Floyd
♡︎Warning: None.
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⋆⋅☆Ace
Ace is the worst person to be around when you're asleep – he seizes any opportunity to draw on your face whenever he catches you napping. There was one day when you unknowingly spent the entire day with a mustache drawn on your face, and no one had the courage to inform you.
If you lean on Ace to use him as a pillow, he'll quip that he isn't a pillow, but he won't budge either. Now, you have an awkward Ace standing still while you sleep, and he's at a loss for what to do. He's not shy about taking pictures of you, sending them later with playful remarks about how silly you look while sleeping. Little does anyone know, he secretly has one of those pictures as his wallpaper. If you happen to use Deuce as a pillow, Ace gets jealous, prompting him to tease Deuce for acting soft – all in an attempt to secure his position as the only one you use as a pillow.
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⋆⋅☆Jamil
He spots you sleeping somewhere and pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts, especially if you're dozing off in class. He doesn't hesitate to wake you up, and if you seem particularly tired, he might even offer to walk you to Ramshackles. At times, he senses a similarity between you and Kalim, dubbing you "Kalim Number two," although surprisingly, he doesn't find you as bothersome as Kalim.
When you happen to fall asleep on him, he feels an unusual tension. Initially, his mind is preoccupied with thoughts of pending tasks, study materials, and, inevitably, Kalim. However, he soon realizes that this instance is different – he didn't just wake you up as he usually does. Could it be that he enjoyed having you so close? It seems improbable, but the truth is undeniable. He allows you to rest for a while, but with a stack of work awaiting him, he can't linger for too long. If you don't wake up on your own, he gently shakes you awake. The rest of the day is spent with thoughts of your peaceful sleeping face lingering in his mind while he continues with his responsibilities.
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⋆⋅☆Floyd
If he finds you asleep, he will literally squeeze you, sleeping around this guy becomes nearly impossible. On the rare occasion that you somehow, got him to stand still long enough for you to fall asleep on his shoulder, he responds by enveloping you in a spontaneous hug. If anyone dares to make a comical expression while looking at you, he fixes them with the most intimidating glare, sending them running away. If you take too long to wake up, he might grow bored and either make a swift exit or take you on a casual stroll while you remain blissfully asleep. Students may even start thinking that he has kidnapped you. If you fall asleep in class, he will find it hilarious, since he probably has done the same thing before.
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altcvnningham · 2 months ago
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so i was reading this post and started yapping in the tags before deciding i actually just needed to make a separate post because i have brainworms. long unedited ramble sorry this doesn't make sense at all
adlerbell & co-dependency;
the sick irony lies in the fact that the co-dependency that exists within their relationship, most of the time, isn't even of their own volition, and yet they are the constant cause of their own entrapment. they NEED one another as much as they hate one another because they ARE each other. to their core.
bell is everything adler hates and opposes and wars against yet he NEEDS them to catch perseus no matter the cost; adler is bound to bell in a way where he is ironically beholden to them, his fate in their hands, even when he's technically the one in control, with the power and rank over them, the one holding the leash. yet without bell adler has little to nothing. powerless entirely. in that way, bell has power over him, that his whole world rests upon the pinprick that is their loyalty to him, which is a hairswidth away from being shattered the second they piece together who they are, what he's done to them.
and bell is obviously only who they are because of adler. warped god wrenching hands into their head and rearranging it all until they suit whatever he deems his perfect image when he needs it. friend, ally, team member. dog, prey, victim. whatever he needs them to be, they are.
and bell's entire personhood is adler. bell's entire world is adler. half himself, a mirror image, their head a scrambled soup of his memories and fears, of vietnam, of things that didn't happen to bell but did happen to adler, a point in time that existed but they were not a part of, not until adler dragged their body off that tarmac and forced them to be. without adler, bell is dead in trabzon, or nothing. and that kind of co-dependency is indescribable- to believe that this man is one who went through the horrors of war with you, your friend for over a decade, is one thing. but even when bell breaks free of their conditioning- to know that they are possibly only alive because he found them? to know that mk ultra, despite being the very thing that destroyed them, was the only thing that stood between them and an unmarked grave??
bell wants adler. but adler needs bell. and mf wants to stand at that fucking clifftop and claim that none of it was personal?? he created a home for bell within himself, how they trust him, rely on him, believe that he'll always pick them up- because even if not in vietnam, he did, once, in trabzon. and bell is a home to all the worst parts of himself, scraped out of him and put into the empty pit he carves out of them- his weaknesses, his fears, his trauma, his ruthlessness. (i could talk about how adler's hatred of bell might even be a reflection not only of them being the very culmination of everything he opposes, but that they're also an amalgam of every worst thing he hates about himself, but that's another post entirely.)
i just. it wasn't meant to be personal. bell was a tool for adler, and adler was just this figure meant to be imprinted on. all means to an end. but against their own volition, they rely on each other. they need each other. they are dead without each other. i think adler needs bell to make himself feel powerful. but god, if they aren't the very thing he has to tiptoe around and revere because without them he has nothing. no team, no perseus. and to bell, adler is not too far removed from a god, whether they know it or not. he made them. and i doubt the lamb wants to stray much too far from its shepherd. ugh. whatever.
don't even get me started on how their fates are inevitably intertwined. how even the narrative itself demands them be slave to each other's will. fuck everything
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tackykachowch · 1 month ago
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While I'm on the topic of Sucker I remember I read a post abouttt hang on. I can't recite it from memory. One sec. Yeah here.
That when Isha falls on Jinx during the line "Pretty little lamb, don't come down here, you're gone, sucker" it solidified her fate, i. e. she's now destined to die because she crossed paths with Jinx. While it's a great observation from OP, but in terms of meta isn't it like....horribly, horribly cruel? Like what we're supposed to get from this? That Jinx is right? That her mere existence causes people who are close to her to die? Not even people who are currently close to her, but who POSSIBLY could be close to her. And that by killing herself she made a morally good decision?
That's just. *sigh*.....You know, as an actively suicidal person I'm like "Hell yeah I should kill myself too", but when I'm thinking about it separately from these feelings I'm just.....devastated man.
Jinx is an incredibly scarred and tragic character who didn't even have a chance to figure out who she is by herself until the end of s1. She and people around her think of her as a jinx, bad luck, and that something will inevitably go wrong if she's involved. But in reality, all of her "bad luck" is just a chain of decisions made by different people at the wrong time, or simple accidents. And yet because of this she's never given a chance to be happy, to live her life like she wants, to love and be loved. Oh, and Silco? Apparently you're the biggest idiot alive for telling her that she's perfect, because she's actually the worst, like you are, and deserves to rot in a ditch just like you (please guys this is sarcasm please please). It's like she's the only character in the whole show who is sought out by fate itself, because how else would you explain this? "Ah, but you see, Jinx's story is a tragedy" no it isn't, it's a torture porn. When your characters suffer for the sake of suffering and then kill themselves out of guilt and depression this doesn't mean anything. At all. Well, if other characters react to it properly and come to some meaningful conclusions maybe it would be worth something, but this is certainly not the case.
And you know what would actually be worth something? That Isha doesn't die. That the symbolic lyrics were all in Jinx's head, and she doesn't actually bring bad luck to the people she loves. She decided to call herself Jinx in s1, so in s2 she should've decided to stop perceiving herself as *a* jinx. That despite everything she's been through and what she's done she's still able to defy her circumstances and fight for a better future, just like her father did. She should've learned to love herself first and foremost, and that way she can give her love to others. That she makes other people's lives better just by being with them, as opposed to what she thought before.
Man I hate s2 writers go to hell
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lethby · 8 months ago
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What's wrong with lesson 16 (everything)
A list by yours truly, who is about to collapse if she doesn't vent about it (TW: opinion lmao)
⍣ ೋ The time-travel shit
LITERALLY WHY
It creates so many problems and plot holes that could easily be avoided for no reason.
We leave everyone behind and it's never even addressed?? THEY'RE WAITING FOR US???
Barbatos, supposedly the one that cares about balance and timelines, just goes "well you're stuck here and I literally erased the other MC, good ending :D"
He told her "don't run into anyone" and she decides FIRST THING to head where all the noise is coming from, not trying to hide at all
⍣ ೋ No consequences whatsoever
It's awesome to know no one cared about MC dying
Sure, she's "alive" now, but everyone moved on so quickly??? Even Mammon, who was in the verge of a meltdown.
And it's all because we're Lilith's descendant how convenient
Even Belphie, our murderer who has hated humans for MILLENNIA, had a major switch up at this
Also, the brothers begin to completely disregard MC by treating her like Lilith
Look I understand, it's your dead sister and you miss her, BUT MC IS NOT HER. SHE IS HER OWN GODDAMN PERSON
But the worst part is... MC IS SO DAMN CHILL ABOUT IT
Even if she technically isn't the one who died, you'd expect some kind of uneasiness coming from her, SPECIALLY AROUND BELPHIE
Words can't express how much I hate it
⍣ ೋ Solution
I'm gonna make the devs a favor and fix their game
REVIVAL
MC JUST REVIVES FOR WHATEVER REASON (Lilith's will, the last remnants of her powers, Barbatos' precautions...)
Now you don't have to worry about too many plot holes, focusing on just one timeline
Also this allows her to remember her death, making her trauma more intense and veridical
I know it sounds crazy but if they could pull off lesson 16, they can pull this off
Make the brothers indecisive
They got their little brother back, but at what cost?
Everything is fine now, right? But it's not. MC is not "fine"
Make them conflicted between taking MC's side and comforting her but also welcoming Belphie and make up
MAKE MC UNCOMFORTABLE
I can't stress enough how important this part is
Give her TIME to evolve, develop as a character, and understand her feelings
She wouldn't want to be around Belphie, at all
She might not even wanna be around the others, seeing as they treat her like nothing happened
Make her upset, confused, feel like she doesn't belong, ANYTHING
MAKE HER GO THROUGH THE STAGES OF GRIEF
In fact, if you want to make her relationship with Belphie nourish, you can do that too by not just hey lol I killed you but I'm good now
Make her have nightmares
That's it
Make Belphie notice the dark circles under her eyes and the way she avoids him, then discover she has nightmares
The "now" Belphie could feel guilty
He might try to comfort her, only for her to shy away in response
Seeing as his apologies don't work this early into the trauma, he could enter her dreams and chase those nightmares away, every night, sacrificing his own sleep
THAT is a dynamic I want to see, personally
This could have been done with or without the time-travel, btw
In the time-travel, though, I was also missing some grieving from MC
Remember when I said to make the brothers conflicted? Make MC suffer more too
She wants to go back to her time, her universe, her family. They're waiting for her
But she also doesn't want to leave behind these demons, which have just found peace and happiness after a long time
Here's the catch, No matter what she chooses, she's forced to live her life regretting whatever decision she makes, since she can't make everyone happy and one side must suffer inevitably
An MC going through a heavy trauma and eventually (and slowly) overcoming it would just click with so many players
⍣ ೋ Conclusion
To me, the game didn't fully explore the feelings that going through that experience would bring for everyone, even if the idea itself was interesting. No, more like it didn't WANT to. Making MC go through all that would mean a lot of character development for a big amount of characters and little romance, which is what the game is about.
However, if you can't make that sacrifice, don't settle your game in a world rich in lore. And honestly, with all the explanations and back stories, I don't think obey me! is lacking on that. More so that, even if they were fully capable, they didn't want to go through all the trouble. Remember we're coming from an already fucked up scenario that took a lot of chapters.
Finally, this is just my opinion based on my experience. Of course, you don't have to agree with me in any way.
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I have to say, that was relaxing lmaoo
Anyways, since I really like this idea and I've seen several people do it, I'm gonna make my own fanfic exploring how I think lesson 16 would have turned out realistically, hope you stay tuned!
Lethby ༊*·˚
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azriels-shadowsinger · 11 months ago
Note
Hi! Can I please request 1 and 16 for Cassian x reader 🥹
“He treats me well-" "Okay good for you." "-but he isn't you."
Cassian x Reader
wc: 1.3k
a/n: so i couldn’t decide how i wanted to combine those 2 different prompts so i’m just writing 2 separate cassian fics i’m sorry. working on the other one right now, but for now here’s this!
warnings: angst, slight suggestiveness at the end
prompt list
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Cassian was sick of it. He was sick of watching you date these undeserving males, fall in love with them, and then get your heart broken. Every single time, you run to him to console you. And every single time, he wipes away your tears and assures you that somewhere out there, there is someone who will love you and treat you right. Little do you know, he’s silently praying to the Mother that one day he can be that person for you. Not so silently, he prays that the stupid prick that broke your heart will drown in the Sidra, which usually earns a laugh from you.
Currently, Cassian was trying to keep the irritated expression off of his face as you told him about your most recent date with some new guy.
“He even paid for dinner! How sweet of him, right Cass?” You ask excitedly.
Bare fucking minimum, Cassian thought.
“That’s great y/n.” The words come out a bit more annoyed than intended, making you frown.
“What’s your problem?” You ask.
“Nothing.” He mutters.
“Bullshit, Cass. Did I do something to piss you off?” You try to think back over the past few hours to remember what you did to upset him, but nothing comes to mind.
“I just don’t really care to hear about yet another male that you think is your one true love, who will inevitably break your heart in a week.” You stare at him, stunned.
“Well, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I wasn’t allowed to talk about my love life to my best friend.” You argue stubbornly. He lets out a laugh.
“I wouldn’t call getting broken up with every other month a love life, sweetheart.” He regretted the words the moment they left his mouth, but it was too late.
“Fuck you, Cassian.” You storm off before he can even apologize.
———
Unsurprisingly, the new guy ended up being a jerk and stood you up the following evening. You had waited at the restaurant for over an hour, earning apologetic looks from the waitress.
Cassian tried to act casual while he sat on the couch at the House of Wind, waiting for you to return from your date. He picked up some random book that Azriel had left and began scanning the pages when you winnowed home. Cassian can’t help but let his eyes roam over you, admiring your stunning figure accentuated by your dress. As soon as his gaze reaches your face, he notices the tears threatening to spill and stands up immediately. He debates walking over to comfort you with a hug or letting you come to him, still unsure if you are mad at him.
“I don’t want to hear ‘I told you so.’ And I know you don’t want to hear about my dating life anymore, so I’m going to bed.” You rush from the room quickly, leaving Cassian alone once again.
Yeah, you’re definitely still mad. Cassian has to fight the urge to follow you. He knows how your brain spirals in these situations, blaming yourself and doubting your self-worth, all because of a stupid male. He wants so badly to go up to your room and console you. He wants to wipe your tears like always and say some idiotic joke to make you laugh. More than anything, he wants to reassure you that this isn’t your fault. But he can’t, so he just sighs and sits back on the couch, picking up the book again.
———
It had been a few weeks since you and Cassian had a proper conversation, both of you too stubborn break the silence first. There had been a few short exchanges, usually just during training or when others were around, but the tension was apparent to everyone.
Cassian had heard from Mor that Feyre set you up with one of her artist friends, Kallum. He can’t be mad at his High Lady for doing what she thinks is best for her friend, but gods he was pissed about it.
You had gone on several dates with him over the past few weeks. He overheard you telling Feyre about them, describing the romantic gesture that Kallum made recently.
Was this it? Would this be the male who finally stole his best friend from him for good? If this male is a friend of Feyre’s, he must be a good guy.
Cassian hurries past the sitting area, not wanting to be caught eavesdropping, but somehow you catch his eye. He can’t help but notice the flicker of sadness in your stare.
———
After four weeks of stubborn silence, you approach Cassian at training.
“Hey.” He turns to you, surprised.
“Uh, hey y/n.” He notices that you’re picking at your nails, a nervous habit from when you were a kid.
“So, I’m bringing Kallum to dinner tomorrow evening. To meet everyone.” You say awkwardly.
Oh.
“I know you and I are still in a weird place, but can you please be nice? I want to make a good impression and see what everyone thinks of him.” You bit your bottom lip nervously.
“Why do you care what we all think of him?” He huffs.
“Because I care what my family and friends think of the person I’m dating.” You counter defensively.
“Do you really? Or do you need us to like him in order to convince yourself you like him too?” You scowl, but Cassian has that stupid cocky smirk on his face. He’s not wrong, which only pisses you off more. You had tried desperately to like Kallum. He’s a nice guy and he seems to like you a lot, but you just couldn’t find a spark between you two.
“He’s a good guy Cassian!” Your face turns red and you are too flustered to come up with a more clever response.
“If you say so.” Cassian rolls his eyes. You sound like you’re trying to convince yourself, not him.
“He is! He treats me well!” You argue.
“Okay, good for you.” He says sarcastically. You stay silent for a long moment. Cassian turns to leave, not wanting to argue any longer.
“He treats me well…but he isn’t you.” You say softly.
Cassian freezes. Surely, he misheard you. He turns back to face you and is faced with the vulnerable expression on your face.
“Seeing as you don’t seem to want to be my friend anymore, there’s no point in hiding it any longer.” He takes a long stride towards you and takes your face in his hands.
“You’re right. I don’t want to be friends anymore.” Cassian presses his lips to yours, kissing you deeply. You melt into his touch and tangle your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. The kiss quickly turns heated, and you let out a soft moan. Cassian pulls away, and you give him a confused look.
“As much as I want to continue this, sweetheart, I plan to take you to dinner first. I want to show you how you deserve to be treated on a date.” He leans in close, brushing his lips over the shell of your ear. “And then maybe I can show you how you deserve to be treated in bed as well.” Your face turns bright red, and you nod. Cassian lets go of you, but you pull him in for another kiss, this one lasting a bit longer than the last.
“I should probably go break up with Kallum.” You giggle between kisses. Cassian growls at the mention of another male’s name and pulls you closer.
“That is the last breakup you are ever going to have. I’ve waited 500 years for this, I’m sure as hell not going to mess it up.”
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Feel free to keep requesting prompts :-)
prompt list
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tarnished-butsogrand · 3 months ago
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To Liam,
It's so strange that I just couldn't bring myself to create anything to honour the role you've played in my life. It's like I cannot allow myself to say goodbye to you, trying to push back the inevitability of it. This permanent goodbye that I don't want to speak into existence.
"Let's leave it unsaid, just one more second
If you don't say it, then it ain't true yet"
When I first 'met' you, I was newly thirteen and I saw your music video 'One Thing' on TV. I had excitedly texted my best friend at the time, gushing about five cute guys on TV that were singing, "Get out, get out, get out of my bed" which amused my friend to no extent. It was the start of a character defining moment in my life, and I didn't even know it then.
It was hard to keep up with you guys, our access to the internet was limited. Watching YouTube videos back then was a task. I would go to all lengths to do so anyway, because it felt like I had five friends who I could joke around with. That's the strangest thing. I so desperately wanted to be friends with you guys. Not date. Just friendship. Looking back at that time, I almost feel sorry for how lonely I was to depend on five guys who didn't know of my existence for friendship, but then I don't. I don't know what kind of person I would have become if I had been oblivious of your existence. Now, I have had so many friends that I have met/ talked to through you. I am not in touch with all of them, but I felt like a part of a community.
You'll never feel like you're alone
I'll make this feel like home.
You taught me to dream. For the longest time, I was adamant I would form a band myself, and be famous and meet you guys. I was so sure of it! I could never afford to buy albums, or the movies, the books even though I desperately wished to. Then, for my eighteenth birthday, I finally got my hands on your book and the This Is Us movie
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It was my dream, to meet you guys one day, all of you, and have you sign this book. I would tell you how much you inspired me, helped this little girl in a little town dream of going places. Gave her hope she could make it out of there one day.
I am so grateful for that.
It's hard to think you were together as a band for only five years because it sure felt like ages back then. There was always so much... Drama! I still remember the day Zayn left the band. The best friend who had first heard my atrocious interpretation of your lyrics, she was the one who broke the news to me. My chapattis and okra curry seemed extra salty that day. My family was surprised. What is she crying for? I would tell them and they would try to keep from laughing. It felt like the world had ended, but everything carried on as usual.
Life went on, I begrudgingly decided against pursuing a career in music. It's so funny, isn't it? You guys were living the dream and consequently taught me how to dream. And now, you've left us because of it and I'm still here because I didn't pursue it (not saying I would have become as famous as you, or famous at all). I got into medical school. By that time, you were already three years deep into your 'hiatus'. I would hear about you, now and then. Maybe listen to a single or two. Loved Strip That Down. Loved your interviews. Loved For You. Was waiting for an album.
I kind of lost touch with the 1D fandom and you. In the blink of an eye, 2020 was here. I got back to the fandom right in time for the 1D 10 years anniversary. I was sure it wouldn't have any effect on me. I was grown up now. Then I bawled my eyes out to Fireproof and I realised I was still a sucker, and I would always be.
Nobody knows you, baby, the way I do
It's been so long, it's been so long
We must be fireproof
Then I realised. It wasn't the same anymore. When I left, people were excited about everyone's solo careers. Five times the fun, right? Everything had... Shifted. There were camps and groups and, it just wasn't actually the same. I was horrified. Blogs dedicated to hate certain members, the word 'flopped' being used incessantly when it came to them. And bearing the brunt of the most of it was, you.
I don't want to go back and rehash it all, it's too painful, but you know what? I would have that time back in an instant if it meant you were still out there. Alive. When the possibility of this happening was so damn preposterous, not even the craziest fanfiction could have a plot line like this.
I don't want to say I felt sorry for you, because that makes you seem small. You had talked about your struggles, but you had also gotten better. I heard Heart Meet Break and I heard Weekend. They sound so ominous right now.
Heart meet break, lips meet drink
Rock meets bottom, to the bottom I sink.
Fuck.
I come alive on the weekend
I might die on the weekend
Another line for my demons.
All the while, facing vitriol that was frankly alarming. There was nothing you could say or do that wasn't criticised or scrutinized. I felt helpless but I was determined, once again that the tide would turn. That people would see you for the kind soul that you really are.
Let me tell you, LP1 was damn good! I hope you're proud of that album, wherever you are, because you smashed it! And your First Time EP? Still mad that Slow wasn't on your main album, like who made that decision? I am sorry people didn't pay more attention to your music, because it is amazing! Your voice, of course. That note in Bedroom Floor-you aren't real, you know?
And your videos during the lockdown? And your LP shows? You kept us entertained and happy. We loved watching you do the thing you love the most.
Oh, Liam. Then I gradually drifted apart again. I wasn't there when you came out saying you had been sober. I wasn't aware it had gotten worse. I don't know why, but this October, I listened to your music for the first time in a long while. It's so strange. Just a few days later-
I still can't believe it, Liam. I still can't believe you have left us. I can't believe that this is the end, this is how you had to go. With the world still against you. You didn't get your chance at redemption, you didn't get your chance to prove to everyone how amazing you were! You had so much love left to give. Everyone talked about how you checked up on them frequently. I am sorry there was no one to do that for you. I am sorry for the way you were treated. I am sorry you didn't get the help you needed, I am sorry that we can't enjoy more of your songs, your voice, your paintings and most of all, that laugh where your eyes all crinkle up, and your body physically rocks with it, and for a moment you become the embodiment of sunshine.
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You were just a boy, who had one working kidney and the other that miraculously started working. You were just a boy that had a fear of spoons and loved dinosaurs. You were just a boy who apparently couldn't read but wrote so many songs for One Direction that we hold close to our heart. You were just a boy who warned people against snake habitats, and dropped tubs of pasta on your floor. You were just a boy who is loved by so many, whose loss will weigh heavy on our hearts for the rest of our lives.
I'll never forget you. And I promise, I will make all my dreams come true. Maybe not the singing part, but the rest. Hope you're happy, Leeyum. I hope they're treating you better than we did.
How can I forget someone
Who gave me so much to remember?
With love, always
Rini
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jigglypuff1994 · 4 months ago
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I keep thinking about Bugnoire talking to Nathalie about how the world will be her world as she designed it.
It was so dark, so unlike anything we have seen from her before.
I get that she is fourteen.
I get that she probably hasn't slept in like seven business days or really since she became guardian.
I get that she has a *lot* on her plate.
but like.... girl
You have a choice to tell Adrien, and you chose not to. Because you want to 'protect' him.
Why Mutual Respect is important: 101
First off, you shouldn't decide what a person can and cannot handle. Especially not your significant other.
Mutual respect is a real relationship-driven factor.
Taking away a person's choice is a sign of disrespect.
In early child development, experts stress the importance of choice. Allow them to choose a color, an outfit, a snack, an activity. Things that they can comprehend and easy decision-making tools to make them become more confident in themselves in the future.
Adrien can comprehend what happened to his father. He can understand the implications of his father's actions, and by giving him this choice, he would be able to determine for himself whether or not he could've handled it.
By denying him even the choice of knowing the truth is not protecting him, it's hindering him.
He asked for the truth. He wanted to know the truth.
And the saddest takeaway from this is that Adrien trusted BugNoire. He respects her which is why he believes her, both as Adrien and Chat Noir. He believes fully that she, his best friend and partner, would never deceive him.
Ladybug would never lie to him.
Which begs the question: what's going to happen when he finds out the truth?
Marinette: Gabriel Part Deux
Kagami said it best: Marinette allowed her love for him to blind her.
And you know who else allowed love to blind them? Gabriel.
She may have done it out of love, but it's not love at that point, it's still a form of control.
Subconsciously, she wanted to control the situation by making decisions for him.
Her decision was not to tell Adrien. It's the same as what Gabriel wanted.
What she wanted in her world is the same as what he wanted is his world.
I want that to sink in... She would make the same decision for Adrien as his father.
I know Lila is the villain, but like... Mari, girl, what are you thinking?
Why would you do what the villain wanted? Gabriel is dead. Who cares what he has to say anymore or what he would have wanted?
Adrinette: Turbulent times ahead
I don't want to say it, but I'm going to anyways.
The set up is clear. Many other unhealthy things are going to happen between her and Adrien.
And we were teased her obsessive behavior with the binoculars in the s6 cut.
Yes, Marinette has always been low-key/high-key obsessed with our blonde model boy.
Is it healthy? Eh.
About as healthy as Chadrien's shrine for Ladybug.
Let's be honest, they are both little crazy critters in the love department. Which can be cute when you're that age, but it can also set up for some major toxic behaviors in the future.
But here's the thing...
I think they both have been through some life-changing events.
They are not the same people they were before the finale.
Again, coming back to our girlie Kagami because she's always right. Both her and Adrien have changed.
Change is inevitable. It's impossible to stay stagnant and grow.
In fact, everyone has changed since Gabriel decided to become Paris' terrifying butterfly man.
But I think after this special, Adrinette isn't going to grow together, they're going to grow apart.
And don't get me wrong, I don't want Adrinette to break up.
I don't want them to be sad and lonely and fail in their relationship.
I want them to grow and become their best selves.
I just don't think that they need each other right now.
Codependency is a real thing that isn't healthy.
And if they lean on each other as civilians right now, they're going to become really weirdly attached or become so derailed from reality that they become detached.
Its just... I don't see Adrinette lasting at this very moment.
They have so many things to learn individually.
I don't see how they could do those things together.
And you could argue: But Jigglypuff, isn't the phrase "Stronger together?"
And that's an excellent point, it absolutely is... for LadyNoir. They've had each other's backs since the beginning. They've always depended on one another. Especially through season 5 when HawkMoth held all of the other miraculouses. They believe in the strength of their partnership and the endurance through the hard times. They will persevere.
Adrinette is not the same energy. They don't have that mentality of 'we're in this crazy ride together because we were all each other had'. They're a couple of middle school aged kids who adore each other a lot. They are the couple everyone in school shipped and thought were the cutest. And yes, of course, you want them to be together, but like most middle school relationships, we outgrow them. It's not ride-or-die. (don't @ me. you know it's true.)
They both have secrets to keep from one another.
They're both burdened by the shackles of Gabriel's actions/made-up actions.
They're both on shaky grounds right now.
And yes, Maribug and Chadrien may be the same people, but they don't know that. So, they're going to treat their relationships differently.
As an adult, it's hard to grow with someone.
Imagine being their age and going through what they went through... I couldn't imagine a realistically healthy Adrinette relationship would flourish after that.
Marinette will most likely have a breakdown (again)
Marinette has a tendency to push people away when she is overwhelmed. She doesn't want to burden others with what she sees as her problems and definitely internalizes everything.
I get it, girlie. Me, too.
But like... these aren't your problems. They're Adrien's problems.
She'll never look at Adrien the same way, and that makes me sad. She'll always feel that sense of guilt gnawing away, tearing her apart bit by bit until she can't take it anymore.
And if I can predict what she'll do, she's going to run away from Adrien without an explanation. She's going to hibernate and shield herself from the world. She's going to become obsessive with that melted down statue of Gabriel and stare at it and scream and yell and wonder why he did this to her.
Marinette has been through the ringer.
She hit her breaking point during this special.
I hope she grows and can handle stress better in the future.
*****
I'm so excited for this upcoming season.
The special/interlude between season 5 and 6 sets up so many what if questions going into season six.
As much as I love the Paris special, I feel like the London special was the perfect bridge between this upcoming season and the last. I think I have a partial timey wimey shenanigan tips-the-balance scale.
Also, I don't think I should have to say this, but please be kind in the comments. These are my opinions. They are not factual.
You do not have to agree with me.
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kalinara · 1 month ago
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So as someone who immensely enjoys disliking Charles Xavier, I have to admit, I was utterly delighted when the X-Men Unlimited Infinity Comic (in Krakoa age, one of the rare times it did not involve Nature Girl murdering people) decided to do what is, essentially, an "It's a Wonderful Life" plot for the guy.
So if even if you've never seen the original movie that the plot comes from, you've undoubtedly seen a parody or homage, (at least if you're American). Sitcoms particularly like to use the idea, but occasionally even serious shows will do it too. A character goes through some shit, is dreadfully unhappy, and is shown what life would be like without him.
Now the thing about X-Men, is that we did see what the world would be like without Charles Xavier in the Age of Apocalypse storyline. And admittedly, it's pretty bad. Scott has long hair. Enough said.
And of course, the gist of this story is that Xavier ends up in the Age of Apocalypse world (or maybe just dreaming about it), and introduces them to the Krakoa concept and gets a big ego boost.
It is what it is. The part that amuses me is what drives Xavier to the point of needing this ego boost. And it is an AMAZING level of petty.
Since there are a lot of scans, I'm going to put them behind a cut. Enjoy! (These are all from X-Men Unlimited Infinity Comic #62, by the way.)
So we start off with Xavier's daily schedule:
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It's a pretty busy itinerary, admittedly. So now, let's see how Xavier's day actually goes.
We actually start off with Xavier waking up, disgruntled, at 6:00 AM. I'm not actually going to show this, because I am not a morning person either and can't make fun of him for it.
Also, he's shirtless, and not being named Max or Erik, I am not into that. Sorry.
But, let's look at the rest.
6:30's resurrection of Rusty Collins
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Xavier was apparently a bit slow, and Hope decided to resurrect the dude without him. That happens. You can hardly blame a teenager for leaping at the chance at grown-up responsibility.
Also, she's a Summers. So it's pretty much inevitable.
--
So then we get the 7:45 meet and greet.
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A small child adores Kitty. Kitty is a little meta here, but not wrong. After all, part of what the Marauders do, at this point, is rescue people.
Now, Xavier looks kind of neutral here, but given that this is part of the litany of disappointment, contextually, one must interpret this to mean he is disappointed.
But here's the thing, Chuck. You're not an "X-Man". You're the dude who sends them out from the shadows. You didn't even publicly admit to being a mutant for decades. And while, yes, you did have some physical issues that made being a field operative impossible, it's not like you're going out on rescue missions NOW.
Sorry, I shouldn't rant. There's more to mock.
--
So how does the 9:15 teaching session go? We don't actually know. Presumably it's not notable. Despite the fact that teaching is the one thing Xavier can claim he actually does.
Instead, we skip ahead to the 11:05 parole hearing:
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I mean, you can't actually be surprised by this. I'm not even sure that Sabretooth is still IN there. But he's busy torturing people, if he is. So no, he's not getting out.
You could let the kids out though. Poor Idie.
--
This bit makes me laugh:
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Got stood up by the guy whose mind you forcibly wiped. You can't be shocked by this, Chuck. That was a fucking dick move and you know it.
(Especially since you decide that Franklin isn't a mutant after all.)
--
How about the X-Corp Review?
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Huh, who'd have thought that multi-millionaire business people would have the business shit handled?
I mean, to be fair to Charles, he does seem to never lack money, so he likely has business sense himself. But meh. I can't blame Warren and Monet for wanting to go off and canoodle or whatever.
--
I admit to some sympathy here, just a bit:
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I've mentioned that I'm not a really a fan of the Arakko focus on Omega mutants, and how that kind of spoils my enjoyment of Storm basically being amazing up there. (I feel like it'd be more satisfying to have a non-Omega show them that sheer power isn't the only measure of awesome. I did like watching her use teamwork to kick Vulcan's ass though.)
That said, why did you not realize this would be a thing, Xavier? Arakkans make no secret of how their society works.
--
Now, sadly, we skip the legal conference about the X-Babies. Presumably it goes well and no one mocks Xavier, but I'm kind of fascinated by the idea.
But then we get the official Treehouse lighting ceremony:
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...are you really feeling left out because your two former child soldiers are getting honored as "mutantkind's greatest heroes".
Fucking REALLY?
Are you living among humans and saving them from various threats? Heck, are you sticking around to help hand out meals, as the mayor mentions? Because you're not down there, and your itinerary says you'll be having a meeting about Orchis with Beast in like an hour.
It presumably goes well, because we skip ahead to sparring with Logan.
This goes pretty straightforward. They have a heart to heart, which I appreciate, because I'm still utterly boggled by that bit in X Lives of Wolverine where he claims that, despite their respective ages, Logan sees Chuck as a father figure.
By the way, Logan doesn't act like a "son" in this scene at all. He does give some legitimately good advice though and asks the question that's the point of all this:
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And for FUCK'S SAKE, Xavier. The fact that this is apparently an armor piercing question, after a day where the WORST thing that happened to you was having a few appointments go on without you, getting stood up by a dude who's got every reason to dislike you, and seeing Kitty, Scott and Jean get SOME MEASURE of weak recognition.
THAT's what leads to the "It's a Wonderful Life" moment?
I mean, presumably, the interview with Trish Trilby which happens before the sparring match goes well. Meaning you're going to be on the fucking news as the face of Krakoa again. But that hardly matters because the Mayor of New York considers your SURROGATE CHILDREN to be the greatest heroes.
You couldn't even be HAPPY for them?!
(I also can't help but note that upon meeting AoA Cyclops, who assumes Xavier is an escaped clone and tries to kill him, we see no sign of the ACTUAL character's complexity or depth. He's just a random villain here. Because in the end, it's all about Xavier's ego.
He does refer to Scott as "the most pragmatic man I've ever known", which is a really interesting description that I'm not sure I agree with. But that's an analysis for another day.)
Anyway, as mentioned, the rest of the story is basically just fueling Xavier's ego. I mean, Age of Apocalypse IS a hellhole. (Though a friend of mine suggested once that possibly the only thing Age of Apocalypse proved that Xavier was necessary for is preventing Mr. Sinister from regaining control of Cyclops. I think I'd have to reread the story to see if I agree, but since I hate Xavier, I DO like that thought.) And he does bring them Krakoa and joy.
But I'm just going to bask in the fact that Xavier's deepest pain on Krakoa is that someone occasionally recognizes other people instead of him. I bet he hated Scott's Rolling Stone cover too. :-D
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smallidarityfan · 6 months ago
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this is my first ever ask hi I just wanted to say.. u shared that adorable teleporting clip of scar and pearl & Ive been thinking about them ever since!!!!....... & I know this is a smallidarity account but you've infected me so if you have any more scearl thoughts in that large brain of yours. me personally. I am all ears ^__^ ^___^ ^____^
JAHSHS HI im very honoured to claim your first ask and also sorry for replying to this after months 😭 tbh I just wanted an excuse to show this art I made of them like 2 years ago that i recoloured recently
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anyways thoughts:
I watched both their POVs since the start of Season 8 to season 9 and loved their vibe of messy, ambitious architect x bright and passionate artist and caretaker?
( character rant ahead )
In Season 9 to me, Scar is this stressed out architect trying to envision his ambitious dream for his theme park within the limited timeframe of the season. He struggles taking care of himself staying up for projects and inevitably leaves messes around the place (chest monsters and lack of proper base lighting)
Even before the sudden light into his world, Scar already admired Pearl's work as an artist— frequently going to her base just to admire what she's done— and now this amazing artist was here at his theme park working as his designated cleaning lady, as someone who doesn't mind the crummy pay of 64 diamonds per week he was only able to offer...
And then Pearl comes around and decides to offer her cleaning lady services to lift his stresses yk? She offers to help him organize his chests, to clean up the area, and to teach him how to take care of himself again. Scar was appalled by that care since nobody really took that time for him, yet slowly melts into it yk?
Haven't even gotten into the life series aspect of their relationship GOSHHHH with the whole sunflower thing AGHDGGDHSD
In Double Life, there should be something said about how Scar was able to understand Pearl's loneliness after Scar's Magical Mountain in Last Life... and especially how they both loved their soulmates in Last Life/3rd Life before they abandoned them in the series about soulmates.....
And then Secret Life.... Secret task: Be Pearl's Wingman.............. "What's going on here Sunflower?"................ "If there's one thing I learnt, Pearl, is that no alliance is ever sacred." "*chuckle* Y'know what Scar, you're growing on me."............... Scar having to choose a side between Scott or Pearl and decided to side with Pearl..................... She's dead Scar, you won..............
IM ACTUALLY CRAZY
In my head, nearing the end of Secret Life is when they both already internalized their feelings but of course so close yet so far due to their own griefs (Pearl specifically with the Mounders and her failure of sacrificing herself for them. AND MAKES IT UP BY OFFERING HERSELF TO SCAR........) to ever pronounce it to each other and now Life!Series Scar lives with that grief within him forever CANONICALLY....... BECAUSE HE ISN'T DEAD........ STILL IN THAT FREAKING SUNFLOWER FIELD........................ GAHHHHHH
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