#And threw tantrums whenever things went SLIGHTLY wrong in his plans

[astro-b-o-y-d]

If you think Bill Cipher has tall person energy, that’s because he puts in SO MUCH EFFORT to make you think he has tall person energy, which is a very short person thing to do.

[creepytoes88]

His cumslut

Letting Vinnie do basically whatever he wants tends to benefit me more then most people might think. My best friends are always saying I’m gonna regret letting him go to whatever party or anyone's house. They say he’s a hypocrite because he always has tabs on where I'm at and who I'm with honesty it does get annoying at times but he can't help that he has trust issues. I knew what I was getting into when I said yes to being his girlfriend he has had a bad past with every girlfriend he's had, all of them have cheated and every girl he got with outside of a relationship just uses him. He was very clear on how he feels about unnecessarily revealing clothes “Wear what you want but if I have to kill a guy tonight I'm punishing you when we get home.”

A very common phase he uses but that's the worst of it I don't mind telling him who I'm with or where I am, I never ask him where he is because because I know he won't go looking around anywhere else. I've explained this to them a thousand times “Well tell us why your so confident he won't cheat” I blush slightly and shrug “YOU DO THIS EVERYTIME” I look down “it’s personal” they look at each other and laugh “tell us you prude” I chuckle slightly “promise no Judgement or making fun of me!” they both hold out their pinkeys and nod “wellllll...I let him do whatever he wants-” kay laughs “Yea we know” I look down “i mean anything” I slowly look back up “what he says goes.... Don't wear clothes for the rest of the week.....suddenly I'm busy all week” they look at me dumbfounded “of course there are exceptions but I let him have complete control with the sexual side of the relationship.” I say with a small smile “and he's good at it too” they look at each other and look back at me before busting out in laughter, “no wonder your not worried...your his sex slave” I tilt my head Vinnie had never used that term with me, I grew up with Vinnie me and him went to school together we weren't close till middle school we decided in freshman that we would be best as friends. The second week him and I were in LA we went to a party and ended up hooking up I was a virgin, and I thought it was gonna ruin everything but to my surprise, we just kept getting more and more serious.

After 5 months of living in the sway house, we moved out into our little house, our sex life completely changed when we no longer had people living with us. Vinnie told me his sexual dreams of having me whenever he damn well pleased and having me wear things he likes. Vinnie makes jokes about it but in real life I'm only allowed to call him Vinnie if we're in public inside the house his name is Daddy and that alone. The first time we had a fight in the house I called him by his name and he simply picked me up threw me over the couch, he edged me for hours when he finally let me release the power of it made me faint for a minute scaring the the absolute shit out of Vinnie. ”Honestly your not wrong...he’s never called me that but I guess your kinda right” they are quite for a second so I look at them “what” they look at each other before kay takes a deep breath “are you happy though, Outside of the sex he not controlling or pushy?” I smile “oh he's perfect and so sweet to me honestly I'm more worried of hurting his feelings.” I feel my phone vibrant and then Vinnie’s ring tone I answer quickly wondering why he didn't face time me or text me “hey bab-” I hear him breathing deeply “whats wrong?” I ask with worry “I really need you to head home now baby I’ve had a very long day and I need to release some tension.”

I feel shivers go down my spine and I feel myself already starting to get wet I let out a fake sigh “alright Vinnie if it’s that important I’ll be home in 10 minutes” hoping the girls won’t think it’s about something dirty. Vinnie lets out a chuckle “they are still giving you shit about me?” I laugh “I’ll be home soon I love you” I hung up and give the girls an apologetic face “girls I’m-“ they laugh and stand up “it’s okay Y/n we don’t want him to throw a tantrum because your not naked when you get there” I gasp turning around seeing their playful faces “you guys are ridiculous.” We all laugh as we go separate ways, I get in my car rushing home I want to beat him to the house so I can keep the plan of being naked. The second I step in the house I start stripping and then as I’m about to pull my skirt off I hear a door slam. I gasp and rush upstairs flinging my clothes off just leaving them there. I hear the Door open then slam shut I jump on the bed quickly, I place my head and chest against the bed my ass in the air. I spread my legs as far as possible trying to calm my breathing my heart is basically beating out of my chest as I wait for him patiently.

Vinnie's POV

I pull in to the house and shut off the car taking a deep breath ”Vinnie it's not Y/n’s fault that Justin is a dumbass” I say to myself getting out of the car I slam the door releasing as much anger as possible before going in the house to my beautiful wife to be. I will marry this woman she's everything I've ever wanted or needed but now isn't the time for marriage or at least that's what I keep telling myself walking in to the house and slamming that door too I am already kinda feeling better I'm still fucking pissed but I'm not raging anymore I toss my keys into the bowl and take off my shoes seeing hers just tossed to the side unlike usual. I walking into the living room to see her shirt and bra on the floor I smirk and walk up to the stairs seeing her skirt and her panties along with her socks right outside the closed door. “Hello my love-” I walk in to see her bent over with her ass in the air, her beautiful flower on full display along with her cute little button. The sight takes my breath away I can see her arousal dripping down her legs “well aren't you just the prettiest view.”

I see her wiggle her squishy cheeks making me laugh a little “wanna give Daddy a little dance show princess?” I was kidding but my baby never disappoints she immediately started to shake her butt to an imaginary song I watch with my mouth open a little I truly didn't know she was capable of dancing that way. I watch in awe as she began to make her ass clap (as one does💀) I grunt as I feel my dick become impossibly hard I began to take my clothes off as I pull down my boxers. My cock slaps against my lower stomach making my stomach twist I grab ahold of it watching as large amounts of pre-cum slip out. I swiping my tip letting out a little grunt, I hear her call my name I look up at her to see her look at me from between her legs “can I help?” she asks as she bites her lip. I immediately let go and I feel another large amount of pre-cum drip down my staff again making me blush slightly no one makes me as horny as she does.

Y/n’s POV

I jump up from my spot I roll off the bed dropping to my knees in front of him I take both my hands and intertwine them with his big warm hands. First I lick up the line of pre-cum that's made its way to his balls all the way back to his tip before sinking down till he hit the back of my throat. Vinnie lets out a gasp rocking his hips against my face pushing the rest of his cock down my throat a gag comes out as a result but I continue to bob my head and suck I pull my head off taking a breath or two before opening back up and taking him all the way till my nose is pushed against his naval. The prickly hair tickling my nose I let out a small giggle “Oh fuck what was that” Vinnie moans above me and he grabs the back of my head by my hair in a fist “I'm gonna fuck your throat baby are you ready?” I nod my head best I can with his thick and long cock stuffed in my throat and blocking my airway. He pulls back till his tip is almost out before thrusting back in a popping and gagging sound come from my throat and my eyes rolls to the back of my head. I never thought I would get so much pleasure from giving a man head in my life but something about his taste and the feeling of him stuffing my throat that I just can't get enough of. Once I spent a whole day just sucking his dick he came in my mouth and down my throat too many times to count I had a little stomach bulge after and it kinda looked like a food baby. I remember Vinnie asked if that meant I was technically carrying his children now I smile slightly at the memory but I'm brought back to reality when I hear him calling my name “oh fuckfuckfuck” he pushes his cock as far down my throat as possible “Shit Y/n fuck baby!” shooting a long, and hot load down my throat I grab his hips gargling my throat around his cock making him jump and try to pull away as he continues to cum down my throat. He succeeded in pulling out and the last little bit of cum landing on my tongue “mmmm Daddy you taste so good” I say licking my lips I use my finger to the the rest off my chin and off his tummy I look in his eyes at I take the finger and put in my mouth moaning at the taste again. “Fuck Princess you enjoy that way to much don't you think?” he laughs as he lays down on the bed “my balls hurt” he laughs I crawl back on top of him kissing his cheeks and finally his lips “you taste so good though Daddy, I just can't get enough of you.” I run my hands threw his hair “give me like 10 minutes and ill make you feel so good baby” he says as he kissed my neck I sit beside him rubbing his god like body (somebody said something about licking his biceps in the comments as I kinda like that idea so enjoy)

I run my hands over his shoulders and down his arms admiring his gorgeous skin I feel the need to worship him show him just how much of a slave for him I am he doesn't need to tell me I'm his slave, I already know I am and I'm gonna show him. “Mmm Daddy let me worship you” I whine as I began to kiss his chest and shoulders I run my hands up and down his toned stomach I began to kitten lick his hard muscles sucking little hickeys while I'm at it. “Fuck Princess what did you say” I start to kiss and lick his abs my hands rubbing his hard thighs pulling away I say “when I was at lunch with the girls I finally told them the truth about why I trust you so much they called me your sex slave.” I stop and begin to leave hickeys all over his hips and sex lines his hard cock brushing my cheeks and chin “I thought about it and I agree and honestly I wouldn't have it any other way” I lean down kissing his lips “oh princess I'm gonna make you more then just my sex slave” I sinister smile runs across his face and gleam appears in his eyes “I'm gonna make you my cumslut and your gonna beg for my cum....well everywhere if I have it my way.” he says looking in my eyes I feel a blush run on my cheeks and an excited shiver run down my back “you know you'll have it your way Daddy that my job right?” I say with a cute smile tilting my head trying to look innocent Vinnie let's put a dark chuckle “I can't wait to ruin you and really turn you into my cumslut” he pulls me down before flipping us over so he's on top “you won't be able to think about anything else except the way it feels for me to cum in your beautiful body” that sentence sent a violent shiver down my spine, I just got on birth control a little over 2 weeks ago but we haven't had raw sex quite yet mostly because we wanted to be sure the birth control is in full effect before taking the chance. (let's pretend you can't get pregnant on birth control at all lmao) I guess now is better than never “please Daddy make me your cum slut” I whine hooking my leg around his hip running my hands threw his hair.

Vinnie’s POV

My poor little bunny had no idea what she was doing to me as far as she's concerned these are just words flying out of her mouth but to me they are her words of true love and true trust. She trusts me enough to control her body and soon her mind, once she falls into the state of a cumslut I know she won't be able to control her body or her mind hopefully she feels relaxed in that state. The last thing I would want is for her to have a bad experience with me being the one in charge. I push my head into her neck running my staff between her slick lips a small moan falls from her lips “thank you, baby, I won't disappoint you I promise.” I kiss her lips once more before grabbing ahold of both of her legs pushing my spongy tip into her entrance the feeling completely different from when I have a condom on I let out a low gasp. Goosebumps pop up on my skin and a shiver runs down my spine as I pull out a light popping noise is made “UGH FUCK YOUR SO TIGHT” I let out a loud moan throwing my head back. I look back down seeing my sweet girl looking back up at me with wide innocent eyes and her mouth slightly open her hands hold tight onto my shoulders without even thinking I push inside of her both of us moaning as her wet walls fluttering around my dick about sending me into orbit I quickly bottom out letting out a grunt using my free hand to move her hair out of her face “F-fuck Daddy please I want you to use me” I began to jackhammer into her feeling her wall pulse around me her loud moans filling my ears as I pick up her legs pushing them into her shoulders feeling myself go further inside of her “Da-DADDY” I chuckle “what baby is there something you want” she whines and grinds her hips into me making me go even further if that's possible. “Daddy please cum inside of me I wanna feel it” Her little body was shivering, I feel my balls tighten so I began to rapidly pound inside of her “OH YESSS IM CUMMMING” she yells out thrusting her hips up. I grunt pushing as far into her as I can releasing deep inside of her, I look down to see her tense and shivering “you ok bunny,” I ask slightly worried “i-so um I-please” I look at her slightly confused “what baby?” I say with a little laugh I see her open her eyes a little before spreading her legs again “more please.” she whines out I drop my mouth open at my cute little whiney mess “oh princess you have no clue what you just did”

I have other things coming but should I make a part 2 to this

[streetlight11]

Try Not To Fall In Love

Summary: Being forced into marriage is never an exciting idea simply because you are getting married to someone not out of pure love. So when he was forced to marry a girl he doesn't know, he desperately gets help from his friend, hoping his friend could save him from the arranged marriage.

Theme: fake dating au, strangers to lovers

Genre: fluff, tinge of angst

Warnings: none

WC: 6.6k

Pairing: Bestfriend's Friend!Hoseok x Fem!Reader

a/n: Hello! I got this idea the other day while I was listening to a song by Keshi called Summer, where there was a line in the song which goes, "3 months is all we got, try not to fall in love" so I wrote this before I lost the feel of it ✌

“Shoot, what am I gonna do? My parents are setting me up for marriage with this… I don’t know, this spoiled brat whose parents apparently owns the famous clothing brand in Korea. Ugh, I hate her! I don’t wanna be married to some spoiled girl who only thinks about herself.” Hoseok groans in frustration as he paces around Namjoon’s living room.

Hoseok’s parents were power and money hungry. They thrive to be rich but forgets that the safer alternative was to work hard for it instead of taking a short way out. Since Hoseok was an only son, they used him as a pawn by planning to marry him off to the daughter of the most wealthiest family in the country.

He despised this whole plan.

Namjoon could only frown as he didn’t know what to do for his friend.

“Can’t you like maybe, I don’t know? Tell your parents you’re not interested in her or something?” Namjoon asked.

“Yeah, unless you want me to waste my breath then yeah sure I’ll make that excuse to them. They’re going to make me marry her no matter what I say! Shit! I hate this!” Hoseok growled as he plopped on the couch and threw a pillow across the room, making Namjoon scold him for throwing a tantrum.

Hoseok mumbled an apology as the room fell quiet. Just then, it was as though something clicked in the back of Namjoon’s mind. He snapped his fingers and shot up from the couch instantly, shocking the poor boy.

“I know! How about you get a fake girlfriend? That way your parent’s can’t say anything right?” Namjoon exclaimed as if it was the most brilliant plan ever.

“What do you want me to do if they ask me to break up with this fake girlfriend? Joon, I’m telling you. My parents can be hella desperate, they'd do literally anything to make their plan work.” Hoseok sighed again.

“Look, if you get a fake girlfriend, treat her like a real girlfriend. That way, when they see how much you care and love each other, your parents won’t bother you with arranging a marriage for you ever again. There! Problem solved.” Namjoon shrugged, only for Hoseok to roll his eyes.

“Okay fine, sure. But the problem is, who am I gonna ask to help me with the plan? You know I don’t have any close female friends…” Hoseok frowned worriedly at his older friend before the male smirked.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got that covered.” Namjoon said with a satisfied smirk on his face.

You were just typing away your codings for your assignment when a familiar figure stood in front of you on the other side of that wooden table. You glanced up and were immediately greeted by your best friend, Namjoon.

“What is it now, Namjoon? I already told you the group project is not discussable with members outside your group.” You sighed, earning a blabber from him.

“Yeah yeah whatever. Listen. I need you to do me a favour.” Namjoon began, rendering you curious.

“With what?” You asked.

“I need you to be a fake girlfriend for a few weeks.”

“What? Why do you need a fake girlfriend? Having girl trouble again?” You chuckled at your successful mock directed to him.

“Shut up. Anyways, not me. It’s for my friend.”

Your eyebrow was raised in confusion, staring at him with so much doubt.

“Yeah, I don’t know about that.” You said but he was quick to stop you.

“What? Why?”

“Namjoon, for one, I don’t know who your friend is. And two, this might be a little risky…”

“Why do you say that?”

“Most of the time when two people get into these fake relationships, they often end up being awkward and are close to opposite from what they hoped to turn out.”

“Y/N come on! Please! He’s really in need of help, his parents are forcing him to marry a girl he doesn’t even know and love. Just help him this once, will you? After all of this ends, I promise I’ll make it up to you.” Namjoon begged as you stared at him with worry in your eyes and he could clearly see it.

After much thought, you decided to help out simply because if you were in this person’s shoes, you would also dread the idea of being forced into marriage.

You just hope this plan turns out successful.

It was a Saturday afternoon and Namjoon had texted you earlier saying to meet his friend for lunch to discuss how you want the plan to go. Namjoon gave you the address of the cafe and told you to find a guy with dirt blonde hair and black long sleeved shirt. You didn’t want to have a bad first impression for yourself so you opted to dress slightly nicer instead of your usual sweatpants and oversized sweater.

You chose a simple denim skinny jeans, fitted cropped top with a cardigan to go over. Once you made it to the cafe, your eyes skimmed over the entire interior of the cafe.

You noticed that the cafe was filled with people but out of pure luck, there was only one guy seated near the windows alone and was exactly as Namjoon described him to be. With that, you made your way to him, noticing the two cups on the table. You assumed he bought a drink for you to not get kicked out of the cafe.

He was handsome. You definitely never met him before. Which makes things slightly harder considering this means you would have a lot to learn about this guy if you had to pretend to be his girlfriend for the next few weeks.

Right when you were a foot away from the table, his eyes glanced up from his phone only to lock eyes with yours. For a moment, you saw the way his cute brown eyes sparkled.

“Hi, are you Hoseok?” You asked as he nodded.

“I assume you are Y/N?”

“In the flesh.” You joked, only for him to crack into a smile that seemed too adorable. You took a seat after he gestured for you to sit down. Both of you went silent for a split second before you spoke up.

“How long have you waited?”

“Not too long, I think close to about 10 minutes?”

“Oh, sorry. I got stuck in traffic for a bit.” You apologized knowing you were in fact late.

“No, it’s fine…” Hoseok smiled as his eyes glanced around your face for a second while you looked down at the cup to see that it was a Hazelnut Latte, your favourite.

“I bought Hazelnut Latte with almond milk for you. Not gonna lie, I had to get help from Namjoon on what you usually drink. Didn’t want to buy the wrong one on a first meet.” He said as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. You giggled at his confession, finding it extremely endearing how he asked Namjoon what your favourite drink was.

“Anything is fine honestly, I’m not picky but I guess I can say this is the perfect pick.” You smiled when you saw the corner of his lips curled up sharply.

The two of you began chatting more comfortably with each other, getting to know the other in slight depth so that you would know what to say if someone questions you about the other. You later found out he was your age and that he owns a puppy named Mickey. He was a dancer and he likes to rap when he’s bored.

You also found out that he and Namjoon have been friends since high school. Which means he’s known Namjoon longer than you have.

A few minutes later, you both decided to lay out the plan for his fake girlfriend project. You went through the basic stuff, saying what you can or can’t do in public, all that kind of stuff.

After brainstorming and exchanging ideas or thoughts on the plan, you smiled before saying the one thing that both of you had to try to be mutual about.

“Whatever we do, let’s try not to fall in love with each other.”

Your first few weeks of fake dating went well. Hoseok and you managed to act like a legit couple in public. He would drive you to campus every morning, hold hands as you walked around the campus grounds, sit with you during his free period, have lunch with you and Namjoon on days where your lunch schedules are in sync, walk you to your classes with his arm on your waist, basically everything a couple would do.

Of course, not to forget the little kisses he gives you after every walk, before every separation, in between chats, but those kisses were anywhere but your lips for you both agreed to avoid lip kisses.

Everything was going well so far and despite the little butterflies you sometimes get whenever he holds you or kisses you a certain way, you tried your best to remind yourself this was all temporary.

Besides, you were only doing this to practice so that when you do in fact go over to meet his parents, they would believe that you are dating their son.

Nobody would believe someone is dating if they saw an awkward couple who doesn’t know what to do around the other.

Right?

It was a Tuesday afternoon and you were having lunch with Namjoon and Hoseok when the latter sighed deeply the minute he sat down beside you with his own tray of food.

“Hoseok? What’s wrong?” You asked as Namjoon eyed his friend worriedly.

“My mum’s inviting that girl’s family over this weekend to our family dinner. All my relatives are gonna be there…” He said hesitantly as he avoided your eyes. Hoseok was currently picking his food, not actually eating it.

So you gently placed your hand on top of his that was on the table, successfully gaining his attention when he turned to look at you.

“Hey, you’re gonna be fine. Don’t worry too much, okay?” You tried reassuring him but it looks like he was too stressed out about it.

“I know… It’s just… The last thing I wanna do is to humiliate myself in front of everyone, or even worse, humiliate you. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this mess in the first place.” Hoseok said as he began to have second thoughts.

Before you could respond, he got up abruptly while slinging his bag strap over his shoulder.

“Sorry, I have to go.” He apologized as he began to walk away. You turned to Namjoon who looked just as confused as you were. Namjoon told you to go after him and that was exactly what you did.

Hoseok had just left the cafeteria hall and was making his way towards the Dance Studio building when you ran after him.

You grabbed his hand to stop him and once you were standing in front of him, you took in a breath to speak.

“Hoseok, listen to me. Everything’s gonna be fine. No one’s gonna humiliate anyone. Don’t stress out too much okay? It’ll be fine.” You tried to reassure him but it looks like he was still having doubts about it.

“Y/N, the plan was to bring you home with just my parents and that girl around, not my entire family. I don’t want you to get hurt if they say anything bad about you, about us… We really shouldn’t have done this, I’m sorry for bringing you into this.” Hoseok apologized again but you weren’t having any of it.

With that being said, you cupped his face and caressed his cheeks with your thumbs, not caring about the looks you got from the students that were currently passing by your two figures in the middle of the hallway.

“That’s not gonna happen… Okay? We’re going through this together. No matter what. We have to finish what we started. Besides, if there’s anyone during that gathering who I trust would keep me safe, it’s you.”

Your words hit him deeply and he couldn’t agree more. It has been 3 weeks since you started this whole fake dating thing. And if he were to be completely honest, the very last agreement you made right before all this started in which you said ‘try not to fall in love with each other’, this statement has been washed down the drain since the first week of your fake dating.

After the third day of practicing your fake relationship, he realized that you were an amazing person. You were so humble, kind, selfless, down-to-earth, basically everything a guy dreams of. Seeing how sweet you were with such a genuine heart, makes him go all fuzzy and warm for you.

It was only after the first week of that fake relationship that Hoseok realized, maybe he really was falling in love with you.

With that being said, Hoseok leaned into your hands as you watched his frown get replaced by a smile and soon, he wrapped his fingers around your wrist gently to say, “Okay… Let’s show them how love should really be.”

Weekend finally rolled around and you were currently getting ready for Hoseok’s family dinner. You opted to wear a beautiful lavender laced sleeveless dress with a pretty round neck, where the hem of the dress stops just past your knees. You were going to pair it with your nude heels. You style your hair to a pretty low bun with your bangs framing your face in a middle parting.

You kept your makeup at a bare minimum since that was just your personal preference. You were just packing your important belongings into your purse when you heard the doorbell ring.

You abandoned your purse for a second as you jogged to your front door. Once you opened it, you nearly got your breath stolen by how handsome he looked.

He was wearing a white button down formal shirt, the first few buttons undone, his sleeves rolled up to his forearms, pairing that with a tie loosely hanging around his neck. He wore black jeans with the shirt tucked in, along with a pair of black loafers.

Not to mention his hair being styled in a way that his forehead is shown but at the same time, his fringe flops down with a slight volume so that it’s not too flat.

He looks really good.

“Hey gorgeous.” He smirked upon seeing your outfit.

You couldn’t stop the blush forming on your cheeks but you were quick to respond to him to avoid getting teased by him.

“Hey handsome. Give me a second to get my purse!” You said as you jogged back into your apartment, hearing his soft chuckle behind you. After you grabbed your purse, phone and house keys, you strapped your heels on and soon left the apartment. You made sure to lock your door before walking down the hall with him.

Both of you were talking about random topics when you felt him slide an arm around your waist. For some reason, this made you jump while your breath hitched in your throat a little too loud.

Hoseok chuckled at your reaction, clearly not expecting you to react that way especially since you were always relaxed when he does that out of the blue on campus.

“You okay? You seem jumpy…” Hoseok asked worriedly before his eyes searched for yours desperately.

“Uh, y-yeah… I’m just nervous I guess.” You laughed, earning a soft squeeze to your side before he kissed your temple gently like he always does.

“Don’t be. I promise nobody’s gonna hurt you… I won’t let that happen.” Hoseok’s voice gradually got lower until he whispered those last words to you. It made your heart flip and your stomach swirl from both anxiety and adrenaline.

The drive to his family home was about 40 minutes but you enjoyed the entire ride there. Hoseok made you laugh quite a few times, both of you singing along to the songs on his playlist, you played around with his things in his car, him glancing over at you every now and then only to smile every time he catches you doing something silly or was just laughing at something he said.

Gosh he was sickly in love with you.

He finally managed to park in his parent’s driveway along with a few other cars that probably belonged to the other guests. You got out of his car, suddenly feeling nervous all over again. Hoseok noticed the way you were stuck in place beside his passenger car door, making him walk over to you.

“Hey, relax. We’re gonna be fine. You said that yourself didn’t you?” Hoseok smiles as he cups your face softly while he caresses your cheeks with his thumbs.

You slowly nodded up at him, watching as he plants a soft kiss to your forehead.

Of course this was all for the fake relationship at the end of the day, but was all of this gestures really fake though?

Both of you walked towards the front door with your left hand in his, fingers intertwined while your right hand wrapped itself around his left forearm to hold him close to you. Hoseok stopped in front of the door before turning to you and whispered, “Are you ready?”

“Ready if you are.” You gave him a weak smile and soon, he pushed the door open.

You made it inside without anyone greeting you at the door since it was in fact his house anyway. However, the minute you entered the living room, you instantly squeezed Hoseok’s hand lightly. Clearly overwhelmed by the number of people who were gathered there.

“Oh! Hoseok dear! You’re here!” One of the middle aged ladies said with a smile.

“Yes Aunt Ju, I’m here and I brought my girlfriend with me if you all don’t mind. I figured it’s a perfect time to introduce her to all my family.” Hoseok said proudly, making you feel slightly safe in his arms.

Just then, a voice sounded from behind you and it wasn’t exactly pleasant.

“How dare you bring an outsider to our family dinner! She’s not invited! And who said you’re dating this low life girl? You’re getting married to Lena!” Who you could only assume to be Hoseok’s mother, said in full disgust as she glares and looks at you from head to toe.

Hoseok’s body shook with rage as he frowned at his mother, ready to shoot her down with his words if he had to.

“You can’t tell me who I can and can’t be with, mom. Why should I marry someone who doesn’t mean a single thing to me when I can live happily with the girl of my dreams?”

“Nonsense! I am your mother so you have to listen to my decisions!” You were afraid of what might happen next so you tugged Hoseok’s hand a little to gain his attention. Luckily, he felt it so he glanced down at you for a second and the moment he locked eyes with you, he immediately softened.

He took a deep breath before turning back to his mother and smiled, “Yes, you are my mother. But I get to decide who I want to marry for it is my life and not yours.”

His mother’s face distorts into an offended scowl. She watched as her son brought you over to the rest of his family in the living room.

Upon sitting down, one of Hoseok’s cousin’s greeted you with a hug as she began talking to you.

“Hi dear! What’s your name?” She asked.

“Hi, I’m Y/N, you?”

“I’m Seori. It’s nice to meet you!”

“It’s nice to meet you too.” For the first time that night, you smiled genuinely as Seori warmed up to you pretty quick. Though from the corner of your eye, you could see a girl who hadn’t kept her gaze off you from the minute you entered the room.

For this reason alone, you could only guess that she was Lena, the girl who Hoseok was supposed to marry.

You were just chatting with Seori about Hoseok’s old habits when she suddenly leaned in to whisper something surprising to you.

“Honestly, I’m rooting for you instead of that rich girl. She’s such a brat. Hoseok is definitely too good for her.” Seori smiled, making you chuckle. You couldn’t believe Hoseok’s cousin was actually agreeing with you being her cousin’s partner even though she only just met you.

“Oh… Thanks… I guess?” You said awkwardly, earning a laugh from her.

“No really! She’s such a spoiled brat. I don’t understand why my aunt is dying for Hoseok to marry her. Blegh…” Seori faked a gag at the end.

Just then, your eyes travelled over to the other side of the room, only to find Lena shooting daggers into your skull. You got uncomfortable under her intense gaze which caused you to fidget in your seat. Unfortunately, Hoseok noticed this so he turned to you and whispered carefully.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“H-Huh? Oh, n-nothing. I’m fine.” You smiled at him as he frowned knowing you were lying but he decided to just trust you so he snuck a quick kiss to your cheek before smiling at you.

Why is your heart racing?

An hour went by, Hoseok kept you close to him at all times, making sure Lena or his mother never got too close to you.

You were just talking to Seori and Wooyoung, another one of Hoseok’s cousins when you excused yourself to go to the washroom. You made it down the hall and was about to enter the bathroom when you heard bickerings from one of the rooms.

As bad as you know it would be to eavesdrop, you got even curious when you recognized one of the voices to be Hoseok’s.

The closer you got, the clearer those voices were. However, your heart wasn’t ready for what you were about to hear.

“I want you to break up with that stupid girl and marry Lena!”

“No mom! What the hell? You can’t do this to me!”

“I’m your mother! And I demand you to leave that lowlife brat or else, I won’t take you as my son anymore! You choose. Outsider or Family.” His mom threatened him as she began to walk towards the door.

For some reason, you couldn’t seem to move. Your feet were glued to the ground as your eyes pooled with tears at the brim.

The moment his mother pulled the door open harshly, you flinched.

The tears on your eyes were now falling freely down your cheeks. You locked eyes with Hoseok for a brief moment before you looked back at his mother who had a satisfied wicked smile on her face.

“So, you heard right? Break up with my son if you love him and care about him still being a part of this family.”

Hoseok was frozen behind her as he watched you carefully for your next words. You two were supposed to be strong for each other. You were supposed to come out of this family dinner hand in hand with a proud smile on your face. Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem to be the outcome tonight.

So with one shaky breath, you locked eyes with his mother while your tears streamed down your face, giving her exactly what she wanted.

“Okay. I promise I’ll leave your son alone from now on. This will be the last time you see me in his life, if that’s what you want Ma’am.”

“Good. Now leave. You don’t belong here.”

With that, you gave her a weak smile before you turned in your heels and ran. Hoseok was going to run after you but his mother stopped him.

Your running figure caught everyone’s attention as Seori and Wooyoung called out to you desperately but all you did was run to the front door and left. A few seconds later, Hoseok was seen running down the hall and was about to go to the front door when Hoseok’s mother yelled his name.

He stopped in his tracks, only for her to threaten him again.

“Jung Hoseok! Don’t you dare go after that girl!”

“Why?! Why not mom?! Why can’t I go after the one girl that I love?! Tell me mom! Tell me!”

“You don’t love her…” She scoffed, trying to convince herself that her son isn’t capable of finding love on his own.

“What do you know about love mom? You call marrying someone I don’t know, someone I’ve never talked to, someone I’ve never met before, love? If that’s what you call love, then I don’t want to be a part of it. In all my life, I’ve never known what is the true meaning of love besides a family’s love. And now I know…” He paused to take a deep breath before he continued.

“Call me insane, but I am in love with her. I am madly in love with the girl who you just blatantly threatened to break up with me. It’s such a low move of you to threaten an innocent girl when all she did was love me.” Hoseok said as he turned and was about to leave when his mother threatened him again.

“If you step out of this house right now just to go after that brat, you are never to step foot in this house ever again.”

With that being said, Hoseok turned around and gave her a sad smile. He knew the decision he was going to make. He knew it would probably change his life forever. And yet, not a single ounce of regret was lingering in him when he said the next few words.

“And let the girl I truly love slip out of my hands for good? I’m sorry mom, but I don’t think so.” Hoseok said and with that, he left.

Hoseok’s father had to hold his wife back from slaughtering her son as Seori and Wooyoung cheered for their cousin while Lena was just fuming in her seat.

Hoseok arrived at your apartment building, running up to your unit level only to pound his fist against your door. He waited a few seconds but all he got was silence. He tried a few more times and still no response. He panicked as he ran his fingers through his hair, trying to think of where else you could go.

Just then, it was as though something clicked in his brain that made him rush back to his car and soon drove off to the one possible place you could have gone to.

After a few more minutes on the road, Hoseok practically leaped out of his car and soon sprinted up the apartment steps not bothering to wait for the lift.

Once he was on level 4 where Namjoon’s apartment unit was, he gave it a few knocks.

It was currently 10:40pm so he knew damn well that Namjoon was still awake. Hoseok’s mind was currently running amuck as he tapped his foot impatiently against the ground.

Just then, the door opened to reveal Namjoon who looked worried for something, or perhaps someone.

“Joon ah! Please tell me she’s here…” Hoseok whispered desperately as his eyes pleaded for Namjoon to give him the answer he really wanted. Of course, Namjoon could never lie to his friend. Which is why Namjoon lets out a sigh of relief before smiling at the latter.

“She’s in my room.”

With that being said, Hoseok quickly kicked his shoes off only to walk towards Namjoon’s room carefully so as to not scare you.

Once he was standing in front of the door, he skipped the knocking and went straight ahead to open it.

The moment he did, his heart shattered upon seeing you sit on Namjoon’s bed with your knees up to your chest while you hugged them. You had your face buried in your arms as your soft cries echoed around the room.

Hoseok softly entered the room, closing the door behind him as he carefully made his way to you.

“Joonie… Why am I feeling this way? Why am I so sad? This is fake, isn’t it? All this is fake… So why does my heart hurt so bad?” You whispered in between sobs but still not looking up. You felt the mattress dip beside you which means someone had just climbed into bed with you.

Except, you just assumed it was Namjoon. Little did you know, you were wrong.

“Maybe because our feelings weren’t fake.”

His familiar gentle voice caught you off guard as you slowly brought your head up only to gasp when you locked eyes with Hoseok’s soft ones. He was smiling down at you, and yet, you could see how broken he was.

“H-Hoseok… W-Wha… What are you doing here?” Your voice was weak as you stuttered over your words.

“I left… I couldn’t let you leave.”

“N-No…” You croaked out. “N-No… No… What about your family? Hoseok, did you not hear what your mom said?”

With that being said, Hoseok gently cups your face with both hands as he shushes you to calm you down.

“Shh… Shh… It’s okay. I know what she said. But it doesn’t matter because what’s important is that we’re together.” He smiled as he kissed the tip of your nose, wiping your tears away with his thumbs.

“Hoseok…” Your voice was barely a whisper, earning a soft ‘shh’ from him yet again.

“I don’t care what she said. I don’t care what any of my family says. It's my life so I make my decisions. And right now, I’m so glad I left. That way I can show you just how much I truly care for you…” Hoseok paused as he slowly leaned closer to you until his lips were just an inch apart from yours, foreheads touching gently before he took one shaky breath and finally expressed his feelings for you wholeheartedly.

“I love you, Y/N.”

Your heart was pounding against your chest as you closed your eyes, afraid to look him in the eye. Finally, with one small breath, you whispered your reply for his little confession.

“I love you too, Hoseok.”

And just like that, Hoseok smiled as he caressed your cheeks before he kissed you on the lips.

Your heart almost jumps out of your chest as you slide your hands around his waist. He kissed you so sweetly, you nearly allowed yourself to fall on him. Hoseok pulls away with a soft sound, keeping one hand on your cheek while the other rests on your neck.

He kept his forehead gently against yours as his lips purposely brushed over your lips. You could hear his nervous breaths, only for him to whisper against your lips.

“Let me love you properly this time. You’re all that I want.”

With that, you couldn’t help but giggle feeling your heart full again. You loved him. You don’t know what you did to deserve him. Nevertheless, you promised to love him back equally.

7 months had passed without any of you realizing. Hoseok has been staying with Namjoon ever since that unfortunate incident with his parents, more specifically his mother. Hoseok hasn’t talked to his parents ever since, simply fulfilling her request if he decided to leave the house that night.

You were in a stable relationship with Hoseok in which he has shown you more love than what he was capable of giving you previously when you were fake dating.

He showered you with so much love, it makes your heart melt every single time.

It was a gloomy Saturday afternoon. You went over to Namjoon’s place to hangout with him and your boyfriend. Upon your arrival, Hoseok seemed too excited as he quickly tackled you down onto the sofa whilst he tickled the life out of you.

You had to beg him to stop as you ended up panting for air. You were just cuddling with Hoseok on the couch while Namjoon sat on the huge bean bag chair at the corner while you all watched the movie.

You were just drawing random patterns onto Hoseok’s clothed chest, earning soft kisses at the top of your head when you heard the doorbell ring.

All of you glanced around at each other, only for Hoseok to ask his roommate if he ordered anything.

Upon Namjoon saying no, the male stood up and made his way to the door. You and Hoseok continued watching the show while Namjoon went to answer the door. A few seconds later, you heard Namjoon’s voice calling to Hoseok from the end of the hallway but for some reason, his voice sounded a little suspicious.

You definitely didn’t expect this.

“Uh, Seok ah, you might wanna pause the movie.” Namjoon warned as you both turned around. The minute you locked eyes with Hoseok’s parents, you immediately tensed up whilst he sat up straighter in an alert stance.

“Mom. Dad.” Hoseok whispered under his breath as the two of them smiled at their son.

You could feel the tension rising as Hoseok’s body became stiff. To avoid making things worse, you carefully got up and excused yourself.

Before you could leave, Hoseok grabbed your wrist as his eyes were begging for you to stay.

“You should talk to them.” You whispered as you looked at his parents and soon gave them a small nod before you and Namjoon left them to head to Namjoon’s bedroom.

You closed the door behind you and the minute you were inside, you couldn’t help but let out a shaky sigh. Pressing your back against the door, you slid down to the ground until you were seated on the floor. Namjoon frowned as he went over to you, pulling you into a warm hug as he caressed the back of your head comfortingly.

Meanwhile, Hoseok's parents took a seat on the same couch he was in except there was a huge gap between Hoseok and his mom.

“My dear son, how are you sweetheart?” His mom smiled sadly, knowing Hoseok probably still held a grudge on her.

“I’m fine…” Hoseok said coldly, unsure of how to react.

“How’s school? Everything okay?” His dad asked.

“Yeah. I’m coping okay. Nothing out of the ordinary for me as usual.” Hoseok shrugged as he looked everywhere but his parents. Just then, his mother was the first to apologize.

“I’m really sorry for the way I acted that night… I… I wasn’t thinking.”

Hoseok finally looked at his mom with a deep frown on his face.

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I shouldn’t have treated Y/N that way and that I shouldn’t have made those threats to you and her when I should be happy that you found love and that you were genuinely happy to be with her… I’m so sorry, dear.” His mother started to tear up as Hoseok’s heart immediately softened for her.

Of course he couldn’t hate her.

He could never hate his mother.

So when she began to cry, Hoseok scooted closer to hug her, rubbing her back soothingly to calm her down. His father simply smiled as he patted Hoseok’s back a few times for he wasn’t a man of affection. No doubt, he still loves his family dearly.

A few minutes later, Hoseok pulled away from his mother, only for the lady to sniffle and ask, “Can I see her? I want to see the girl who’s been making my son so happy.” She smiled as Hoseok nodded.

He soon got up, making his way to Namjoon’s bedroom. He gave it a few knocks before opening it, only to find Namjoon and you seated on his bed facing each other, placing a game of rock paper scissors. You were just laughing at Namjoon’s mistake when you heard the door creak open and soon, you met Hoseok’s soft eyes.

“Hey…” Hoseok said as he stepped inside briefly to walk to you and Namjoon.

“How’s everything?” Namjoon asked with a weak smile, only for Hoseok to speak up.

“We made up…”

“Oh? That’s amazing.” Namjoon sighed in relief but then Hoseok looked at you and placed a soft hand on your thigh.

“But now my mom wants to see you.” Immediately, your breath hitched in your throat.

What if she still hates you?

Hoseok could sense your worries so he squeezed your thigh softly and soon reassured you that if anything goes wrong, he’ll be there to protect you. With his words of affirmation, you both finally left the room with Namjoon flopping onto his bed.

You walked behind Hoseok while he laced his fingers with yours. The minute you came into the living room, you locked eyes with his mother and for some reason, her words from that night came haunting you back.

You unconsciously hid behind Hoseok and his mother saw this.

However, the frown on her face couldn’t easily be mistaken for anything else. She knew she would leave this effect on you, but maybe not to this extent. And for that, she feels bad.

Seeing how you wouldn’t budge from behind him, Hoseok gently tugs you forward while he whispers to you, “It’s okay… I’m here…”

This was enough to give you some moral support as you carefully sat down on the couch beside his mother.

“Hi dear, how are you?” She asked as you saw a brand new tear threatening to roll down her cheeks.

“I-I’m good, Ma’am.”

“Don’t worry sweetheart, I’m not here to yell at you… I’m here to say sorry. I know what I said to you that night wasn’t right. And I know that I can’t take back whatever I said. And I totally understand if you don’t forgive me. All I wanna say is thank you for making my son happy. I can see that he truly loves you. I’m sorry once again.” She smiled as the tear finally rolled down her cheek.

All the while, you were still holding Hoseok’s hand as he sat closely behind you but his fingers were laced with yours on your lap while his right hand gently caressed your sides to calm your nerves down.

For some reason, you could see the sincerity behind her apology. Which is why you reached for her hand afterwards and spoke up.

“I forgive you.”

His mother stared at you in shock, surprised that you forgave her despite all the things she said to you.

“You… really forgive me?”

“I understand that all you wanted was the best for your child. And I couldn’t blame you for that. But apart from that, I’m thankful that you finally approve of my relationship with your son. I love him so much but I dread to see him being torn apart from his family.” You said.

His mother couldn’t help but cry harder as you offered her a hug to which she openly accepted.

You rubbed her back to soothe her nerves only to hear her say, “Hoseok did an excellent job at choosing the right girl.”

You pulled away to find her smiling at you before glancing past your shoulder to look at her son with a look that Hoseok seemed to understand. His parents soon took their leave, while you went back to join Namjoon after saying goodbye to Hoseok’s parents.

Hoseok was just standing by the door to say bye to his parents when his mother cups his face and whispers, “Don’t lose her, no matter what people say. She’s a keeper.”

With that being said, she kissed his forehead and soon left.

Hoseok couldn’t agree more with his mother’s sentence, knowing that he would never let go of you that easily nor would he lose you because of other people’s words. He won’t ever let those things happen.

And that’s exactly what he’s going to do.

~~~

[commonwealthoccurences]

What Doesn’t Kill You

CW: Pain, taking of medication, facial scar description

Word Count: 2,194

Prompt: Hurt/Comfort

Day: 5

Gage was perhaps the most difficult part of taking over the role of Overboss for Sole.

He was helpful, for the most part, in his signature gruff way, motivated by his own interests and wellbeing, for which they couldn’t blame him. He was well trained and well equipped, never seeming to get caught off guard in a fight, always quick to be on the defensive. He held his own with the raider gangs and their verbal abuse and the undermining words they threw at him. Gage, overall, was just fine.

Something about that bothered Sole. They had never met a plain person in the Commonwealth, for better or for worse. The trader that hoarded cats made a good cup of tea, the Diamond City school teacher could spin stories off the top of his head to rival Old World novels, and even Dogmeat seemed to hold a world of information in his big, brown eyes. And yet Gage kept to himself, kept quiet, and got the job done. That was it. It was dissatisfying, like an itch they couldn’t scratch; the more he brushed them off and held back, the more Sole desperately wanted to know. The more they wanted to earn their trust, and see his true personality, the person he kept locked away from the rest of the Commonwealth.

They weren’t obvious about it. Any outright questions were dodged or straight up ignored by Gage, so they’d long learned to be more tactical about their approach. Starting with small questions and working their way up. A casual conversation about preferring coffee or tea turning into a comment about sibling rivalry. And yet, as always, he was always one step ahead of them. He responded with a mere shrug when they brought up the difficulty of growing up with siblings. Simply twitched an eyebrow when they brought up a debate over which way of planting seeds was better, attempting to find out if he had previously been a farmer. Nothing.

They were desperate to know more about him, wanted to get inside his brain and unwind him from the inside. Eventually, they sat back and stopped asking questions, waiting for him to crack during the ensuing awkward silences. It was a waiting game to see who broke first.

It was an overcast day in the middle of July, the summer’s damp heat being threatened by an incoming group of storm clouds, cloaking the horizon’s sky dark gray, almost black. Gage and Sole were taking the day off for the most part, settling a few arguments between raiders and managing their plans for the future of Nuka World lounged in the Fizztop Grille. Gage’s boot-clad feet were propped up on an empty crate that once held bottles of Nuka Cola, his arms crossed behind his head, Sole laying across the couch across from him. “We should split the territory evenly so no one throws a tantrum.” They rolled a piece of mutfruit over their tongue before crushing it between their teeth with a spray of juice.

Gage watched them carefully, tensed as he attempted to ignore the pain that shot through his eye like lightning. It was sharp, spreading across his temple and forehead, and caused him to cringe. Stormy days never did good things to him.

Sole glanced up from the writing on the papers in front of them. “What’s wrong?” They swallowed the bit of mutfruit and sat up slightly to redirect their attention to Gage.

“What?” His voice was rough.

“You winced. What’s wrong?”

Gage rolled his eyes and got up, twisting his back into a stretch, and walked over to the kitchen area to grab a few Nuka Colas. On his way back to his seat he tossed one at Sole, not bothering to give them any warning for them to catch it, and settled back into his seat with a huff. They caught it on pure reflex and gave him a perturbed glare before they twisted the cap off. The ice cold bottle provided some relief from the pressing, wet heat that surrounded them at the top of the Grille. 

They sighed. “Really, Gage. What’s up with you? You’ve been off all day.”

“It’s nothin’, Boss. What were ya saying about the territory?”

Even as he continued through the sentence he clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth as he spit the words out. Sole caught their tongue between their teeth and narrowed their eyes at him, drumming their fingers against the cold glass of the Nuka Cola bottle, examining him carefully. Slowly, they eased upright and swung their legs off the couch to lean forward. He shook his head. “Seriously. ‘m just peachy, keep up with the business talk.”

Sole ignored him and eased themself to their feet, grasping their Cola and walking around the coffee table to stand in front of him. In the moment before they continued what they were doing he flinched again, hard, at the electric pain that shot through his eye. They pressed their lips together and nodded when his actions confirmed what they suspected and walked around to the back of his chair.

Carefully, they reached out and gently pressed the side of the Nuka Cola to his cheekbone and temple, sporting a crooked smile when he let out a quiet sigh of relief at the feeling. They smoothed a hand over the side of his neck and moved it down to rest on his shoulder lightly. Gage lost himself for a moment and tilted his head, leaning into the glass and subsequently their hand and closed his eyes. They trailed their fingers back up the skin of his neck and ran a fingertip across his jaw, then turned their hand to brush their knuckles over his cheek. He was drunk on the feeling momentarily, before he suddenly remembered himself. “What are ya doin’, Boss?” His voice was quiet, hesitant, like he didn’t even care enough to ask.

“Trying to get you to relax, at the very least.” Their voice had teasing undertones and he couldn’t help but huff out a laugh.

Breaking the moment, the pain flashed up again. They murmured sympathetically and ran a hand through his hair before pulling away. He started at the loss of contact, disappointed, despite the alarms that were blaring in his head. “I’ll be right back, don’t worry. Gonna get you some painkillers, alright? You’re taking the rest of the day off until this passes.”

“Storm’ll have t’ break.” 

Sole hummed in response and began rummaging through their belongings, looking for pain relievers Curie had gifted them before they left Sanctuary for good. Supposedly, they didn’t do much damage to the internal organs like other wasteland medications, and when they used them once to ease a gunshot wound, it had worked like a charm. Despite the fact that they tried not to show it until that moment, they had a soft spot for Gage, and seeing him in pain was the very last thing they wanted; he deserved nothing but the best.

They returned soon after finding the small, rattling bottle and tapped a couple of pills into their hand as they took the steps to shadow Gage. A clap of thunder echoed out as they held their hand out over his shoulder, tilting their cupped palm when he reached up to take the pills from them. He threw them in his mouth and tipped his head back to dry swallow them, sighing when they finally went down. He paused for a moment, weighing his options. “I’m gonna fuckin’ regret this, but do you care if I take my eyepatch off? ‘s really not helpin’ the pain.” 

Sole responded with a shrug. “Of course not.”

Gage hesitated with his hands poised over the offending metal, debating whether or not he was actually going to remove it. Politely, Sole averted their eyes so as not to put pressure on him, and returned to holding the Nuka Cola against his skin, though the initial ice-cold had faded into a light coolness, hardly keeping back the heat of the evening. The air was still thick with the promise of rain, the humidity choking, but hinting relief in the distant future. They closed their eyes and embraced the electrically charged atmosphere, acting oblivious to Gage’s movements as he unbuckled the leather strap that held his eyepatch on and turned to look at them.

It was something he didn’t reveal to anyone, his eye. Admitting weakness wasn’t exactly his thing, and that’s how he saw his marred eye, despite the way Sole would scold him for it, the scar jagged and harsh against the rest of his skin, his whited-out pupil. He preferred it hidden away, like the rest of his perceived weaknesses, but God was the pain killer whenever it decided to make a comeback, usually whenever a storm was moving in.

Sole’s eyes flickered open and they examined the rapidly darkening sky with a hum of approval, appreciating the way lightning flashed in the distance, barely visible against the horizon. He reached up and removed the soda from their grip, setting it on the table next to him before leaning back into their hand. This caught their attention and they looked down at him, smile brightening when they saw he’d felt comfortable enough to go through with removing his patch.

Their other hand moved up, slowly, to brush their thumb against the bottom of his scar, feather light. When he flinched they simply lowered their hand again to rest on his shoulder for a moment before they leaned down and brushed their nose against the skin just below his ear, tempted to leave a kiss behind, but terrified to overstep boundaries. After a moment of him holding his breath in suspense, they pulled away, their hand dragging across his shoulder as they left and moved to the front of the Fizztop Grille, and leaned against the wobbly railing.

A goddamn tease, as always. It seemed there was an unspoken agreement between the two of them that they were allowed to tease, to push buttons and tiptoe the line, as long as things didn’t affect their professionalism amongst the raider gangs. The day that the raiders sensed a weakness they’d latch on with sharp fangs and wouldn’t let go until the soft spot was ripped apart. 

Gage reached up and pressed his fingertips against his cheekbone just under his eye. The throbbing continued and he resisted the urge to knock his head against the table, inhaling sharply through his gritted teeth. This caught Sole’s attention and they turned away from the now-murky sky and raked their eyes over him in concern. “Lay down.” They instructed firmly, leaving no room for argument as they returned swiftly to stand next to the couch.

He eased himself out of the chair with an annoyed grimace and threw himself down on the couch. He regretted it instantly. Sure, Gage had no trouble making his displeasure at being ordered around known, though he was used to it, but maybe quick movements weren’t the best idea when it seemed his eye was trying to eject itself from his head. He rested his aching head against the arm of the couch and looked up at Sole with wary expectancy.

They tossed the long forgotten papers they’d been looking over earlier to the side and reached under the coffee table, fingers searching for something. Sole let out a pleased sound when they gripped a slick material and pulled, removing a book from the depths of the shelf and plopping their hips down next to Gage’s. “Move over.” They requested, a tad kinder in tone than their previous orders.

Reluctantly, he complied, and shifted himself further against the back of the couch. Sole swung their legs up next to his, not quite as reclined, their shoulder at eye level for him. After a moment of fumbling they arranged themselves comfortably on the cushioned fabric and Sole began flipping through the pages, working their teeth against the inside of their cheek absentmindedly. They reigned victorious as they flipped to the first page of their book and wiggled slightly to emphasize their comfort. Just as they cleared their throat, Gage piped up. “Ya gonna read to me? Not twelve, ya know.” His voice was a grumble, masking the slight bashfulness in his tone.

“You sure as hell act like you are. Now shut up and go to sleep, you big baby.” Their voice had little bite despite their words.

He resigned himself to his fate and attempted to relax into the furniture, his head leaned against their shoulder as they began to read aloud. It wasn’t long before the pain medication kicked in, coaxing him into fully easing his weight against them, his eyes drifting closed. Their voice was a pleasant hum as he drifted off, just as the tension in the air broke and rain began to pour down. The night passed with the thundering drum of rain, Gage pressed into Sole’s side, their arm wrapped around his shoulders, book folded against their chest from when they fell asleep reading, head tilted back against the arm of the couch.

[lame-adventures]

Authors Note: So I know this is more than a week late but I got really busy and haven’t had a chance to publish it until now. I considered abandoning this, but I want to make it apart of holiday themed series. Enjoy!

A perfect Halloween

October 31st, 2020 - A Muggle Quarantine AU

“Oh bloody hell.” Lily murmured to herself, taking in the messy sight of her bathroom. “James! Harry! Get your butts in here.” She stuck her head out the bathroom door and hollered down the hallway.

“Yes love?” James Potter said, clambering down the hallway, holding his two year old daughter at his waist.

“What is it Mum?” Harry asked politely, hoping to avoid an overly-dramatic scolding from a nine-month pregnant Lily Potter.

“Someone care to explain?” Lily said, gesturing to the mess scattered throughout their bathroom.

Wet towels sat in piles on the floor, a whole roll of toilet paper was wrapped across the sink and shaving cream had been sprayed into the toilet itself.

“What the-?”James began, stopping himself from cussing in front of his children.

“Mum you’re a nutter. I would never.” Harry began lamely, rolling his eyes.

Lily eyed him suspiciously, her thirteen year old boy had been known to stir up quite a bit of mischief. And being quarantined inside for the past eight months, had spurred a new level of prankster in the boy.

(Of course it didn’t help that her husband egged on their child every chance he got.)

“Harry James.” James began sternly, his daughter shyly nuzzling her head deep into his shoulder. “This is too far.”

“I didn’t do that.” Harry whined, “I’m not a bloody child.”

“Oi. Language!” Lily snapped at him, she crossed her arms delicately on top of her protruding belly, and tapped her foot anxiously.

“Well? Who did this then?” James asked, setting down the two year old Sophie.

“Why doesn’t Hannah ever get this sort of inquisition?” Harry asked, referring to his eleven year old sister.

“Why are you using words like inquisition?” Lily asked while James bellowed down the stairs for Hannah to join them upstairs.

The Potter’s were, of course, a very rambunctious bunch. Constantly bugging each other and playing childish pranks. But Hannah took after her Mother, the same brightly colored ginger hair and vivid green eyes. Childish pranks were not Hannah’s forte, and her eyes went wide at the mess of the bathroom once she finally met the rest of her family upstairs.

“Oh,” She said, somewhat sheepishly, eyes turned downwards. “That was Sophie.”

“Soph?” James asked incredulously, the two year old in question cowered behind her Mother’s legs.

“Yup it was all Sophie. I saw her a little while ago, before you guys got up.” Hannah tattled.

“And why? In Gods name,” Lily began lowly, “did you not stop her?”

“Or get us?”

“Not my responsibility,” Hannah said firmly placing her hands on her hips.

“Han.” Harry said lowly. “You know this isn’t fair to Mum and Dad.”

“Well Dad kept yelling at me for being a tattletale.” She replied, a knowing smirk growing on her face. It was true in fact, that James had scolded her several times over the past few months for consistent need to tell her Mum and Dad whenever Harry did something slightly wrong.

“Welp. I’m going to put Soph in time out.” Lily said, bending down slightly to pick up the two year old who now sat innocently on the floor, sucking contently on her pacifier and purposely ignoring the conflict in front of her.

“You got this?” Lily asked James, before walking down the long hallway to their shared bedroom.

Lily heard yelling and groaning behind her as she shut the bedroom door, eyeing the armchair that sat in the corner of her bedroom. It had a pile of clothes on it, and with her free arm, Lily pushed the clothes on to the floor and set the squirmy toddler down.

She squatted as best as she could, with her large tummy in the way, and met Sophie’s eye level.

“You do not play in the bathroom.” Lily spoke sternly. “You do not make messes.”

The toddler stared at her mother, suppressing a smile as she sucked on her pacifier.

“This is not funny Sophie Lynn Potter.”

Sophie squealed in response, and Lily groaned loudly in frustration, standing up and pulling the pacifier out of Sophie’s mouth. This prompted the girl to begin screaming, and Lily walked towards her dressing table in agitation.

Her baby sat low inside her, kicking a sore spot near her ribs all morning, and Lily was in no mood to put up with screaming a two year old and bickering children.

It was the morning Halloween; normally her kids would be bouncing with excitement at the thought of classroom Halloween parties, and a night of trick or treating. Unfortunately this year, their new normal involved isolation inside their home while the world raged on outside in a mix of political chaos and a health crisis.

Lily still shudders thinking back to March earlier that year, in the same week the world had shut down and Lily had found out she was pregnant with her fourth child.

For the safety of both her and her unborn baby it was decided Lily would not leave their home at all, lest she come into contact with the virus. And Therefore, Lily has not left her home in eight months.

She looked sadly into her mirror, and took in her worn down appearance. At 33, Lily was at the typical age in which one would have babies. She was always attending some sort of baby shower event for her work colleagues, so getting pregnant at this age was completely normal. Of course she and James had done things a bit out of the normal when they started their family. James was at university, working on being scouted by some of the national football teams, while Lily was working towards a degree in journalism. They had only been dating for eight months when Lily fell pregnant for the first time. They were terrified of course, having a child so young, with so many unknowns of their future hanging in front of them. But once Lily gave birth to Harry, and she held him in her arms for the first time, they fell in love with the baby boy.

James earned a spot on Manchester United’s team, as a second string forward, and Lily got a job as a political commentator for BuzzFeed England. They bought a three story townhouse in the bustling downtown area of Manchester and got married on a chilly Halloween night, soon after they learned that Lily was once again pregnant.

Hannah was born, and for eight years the young family of four lived boisterously and happily. Her friends fawned over her children, and her co-workers cooed in delight when she announced once again she was pregnant when she was 30.

Sophie joined the Potter family in May, albeit her addition was unexpected, and Lily’s children were thrown for a loop with the shock of having to share their parents. Sophie was welcomed with so much overwhelming love that the youngest Potter quickly became spoiled with attention.

When the world locked down, and the five Potter’s learned that they would become six, Lily had been shaken with anxiety this time around. Frustrated with her government, growing bored with being home bound and irritated with her kids constantly yelling, Lily felt like crying.

She buried her face in her hands, and felt her baby kick her gently on the inside. She smiled softly, with as shitty as 2020 had been, there would definitely be a good ending for the Potter family.

James walked into the room, and pointedly ignored the screaming two year old. James and Lily quickly learned that the best way to deal with Sophie’s tantrums was to not give her the attention she was acting out for.

He walked around the side of the bed and wrapped his arms around Lily.

“Happy Anniversary love.” He said, kissing her cheek. “I’m sorry our kids had to start the day out like this.”

“Eh,” she shrugged, sinking into his arms. “I’d be bored without the chaos.”

She moved away from him, peeling off the large tee-shirt she had stolen from him years earlier and threw on a bright orange sweater. A big pumpkin displayed proudly across her belly.

“I made Hannah clean up, Harry is supervising.”

“That’ll end well I’m sure.” She laughed, throwing her hair up into a sloppy ponytail.

“You still up for our plans tonight?” He asked, scooping up Sophie in his arms once she finally stopped crying, and sitting down in the arm chair. He picked up the remote and flicked on the Telly to the morning news.

“Yes, It’ll have to get done soon anyways.” She said, patting her tummy, and smiling when she felt a small kick near her hand. The baby was due in two weeks, and they had yet to put the nursery together.

With four children, their house would quickly become crowded and James had taken to several quarantine projects in effort to make more room for his family. He began with converting the upstairs attack into a room for Harry, complete with his own Telly, a new gaming system and a mini fridge. James then began the task of converting Harry’s old bedroom into a nursery for the new baby.

They had decided to wait on the sex of their child, and opted to paint the bedroom yellow. Marlene had come by a week prior and painted a mural of characters from Lily’s favorite book to read to her kids, Winnie the Pooh.

Harry and Hannah would be spending the evening at the Weasley’s and James’ Mother would be stopping by this afternoon to pick up Sophie for an evening of spoiling, giving James and Lily some much needed alone time. They had incredibly exciting plans, of eating take-away and preparing the nursery.

Soon enough, James had declared he was taking Harry and Hannah to the market to do a little bit of shopping, and Lily sat at home with Sophie. She planted the child in front of the Telly in her bedroom, whilst Lily sat on her bed, editing her latest article for Buzzfeed. This was the last article she had to write before starting maternity leave, and she was hellbent in making it one of her best ones yet.

Her back ached, and she sighed as she noticed Sophie beginning to get restless. Quarantine had been rough for everyone, and being locked up with a whiny toddler began to take a toll only Lily’s nerves.

She slammed her laptop shut and sighed out in frustration, taking in the sight of her daughter. The girl mimicked her Mother, with curly red hair and freckles skin. But she took James' playful smile, and his aptitude for mischief. It wasn’t Sophie’s fault that she misbehaved so often of course, she was bored. Two year olds needed to be out exploring the world, and Sophie was locked inside with her anxious parents.

When the shut downs began, Lily was still required to work. Most days, she was shut away, writing articles and having conferences over zoom. James hasn’t worked since March, and he was tasked with entertaining the kids most days.

Thankfully Harry and Hannah could occupy themselves with school, and once summer came around they got to see their friends again.

But poor Sophie rarely got the sole attention from her Mother anymore, and so Lily took this as an opportunity to spend some much needed one on one time with her youngest daughter.

They made sugar cookies, and the rest of her family came home to find Lily and Sophie sitting in a mess of orange icing, surrounded by dozens of pumpkin shaped cookies.

James presented Lily with a bouquet of sunflowers and she squealed in delight when Harry gave her a box of chocolates and a card.

“It’s from all of us.” He said nonchalantly. “Happy Anniversary.”

James grinned, rustling Harry’s hair and pointed towards a framed photo on the wall next to the stove. It was of James, Lily and Harry as a baby. The day they got married.

“It’s a shame you don’t remember it. You were throwing up from all the cake Uncle Sirius let you eat.”

“It was a beautiful day.” Lily said, shoving a cookie towards Harry. “Let’s not dwell on when Harry threw up all over me.”

At three that afternoon, Mia Potter entered their home, with bags of Halloween treats for Harry and Hannah. She came with her digital camera, demanding the kids get dressed in their costumes for an impromptu Halloween photo op. James had struggled to get Sophie into her Peppa Pig costume, and Harry and Hannah had squeezed into their wizard costumes from the previous year.

Lily begrudgingly got through the picture part of the afternoon, and sat patiently in the living room while James served the tea.

“Any signs of arrival?” Mia asked, the elder Mrs Potter was nearing eighty now. She waited nearly fifty years for her only son, and was more than thrilled when her grandchildren had been born.

“Not yet,” Lily said. “Unfortunately. I’m starting to feel like I’ll be pregnant forever. But I’m trying to enjoy it, because this is definitely the last one.”

“You said that after Hannah.” Mia reminded her.

“We mean it this time.” James said, sitting next to Lily and handing her a mug of tea. “We are stopping at four.”

“Yeah we are out of room here.” Harry said assuredly. “And you don’t want to turn into the Weasley’s.”

James laughed at that, he couldn’t even fathom seven children. The thought of having four was already quelling lots of new anxieties.

“Oh well. I’ve already got four perfect grandchildren.” Mia said, standing up and patting Hannah on the head.

“We best be getting off though, I have quite the evening planned for this sweet girl.” She said, picking up Sophie and kissed her cheek.

Lily kissed her goodbye, and made her way to the kitchen while James accompanied his Mother outside.

“Harry go help Mum clean up.” She heard Hannah whine.

“Well why don’t you?”

“You two better not bring this bickering over to the Weasley’s.” Lily interrupted the brewing fight.

“Sorry Mum.” Hannah said sheepishly, taking the kettle of her Mother’s hands. “We’ll behave.” She said pointedly, staring at Harry.

“Yes. I promise.” Harry said, kissing his mother’s cheek. “Enjoy your night with Dad.”

“What time are they expecting you lot?” Lily asked, leading the way to the kitchen.

“Dad said he’ll drive us over there at seven.” Harry said, moving to load the dishwasher.

“Make sure you take some of those cookies over there with you.” Lily said, it broke her heart slightly. That her kids were at the age where they would rather spend Halloween with their friends rather than their parents.

Halloween had always been a bit of a weird holiday for the Potter’s. It began in their first year of University, when James and Lily met at a party that James and his friends were throwing. Remus had practically begged Lily to join him at their party, insisting she would get along greatly with his friends. Lily’s roommate Marlene had excitedly encouraged Lily to “get drinks and get laid.” Lily did get laid that night, after immediately hitting it off with James. They spent hours talking together, laughing and drinking and dancing. They ended up in bed, in a drunken tangle of limbs, and Lily fell in love. (James had been in love the moment he laid eyes on her.)

The second Halloween spent together was presumed to be when Harry was conceived, again at a party that James had been throwing. Sirius had given Lily a brownie with a little “surprise ingredient,” and she had failed to make sure that James was using a condom that night.

They would never forget their fourth Halloween together. It left a number of scars, and an emotional strain on the young couple for years to come. It had begun with a disasterly dreadful dinner with her sister and her oaf of a husband. They had met at a posh restaurant near Lily’s hometown and the night had ended with Lily in tears after Petunia’s verbal attack. It was the same old conversation; that Lily was a disappointment to her Mother, that Lily was a freak, a failure. A slut for having a baby at such a young age.

She was silent as she walked to the car, hand in hand with James while he struggled to carry their crying infant son at his hip. She insisted on driving, that driving was calming, and James didn’t want to upset her further. He strapped his son into his car seat and climbed into the front seat, plugging in his phone and scrolling through his playlist to find Lily’s favorite artist.

He didn’t notice the red light, the rain was coming down too hard and he was focused on trying to calm the screaming baby in the back. A truck had barreled into them, flipping their car and nearly killing the young family.

Harry was left with a terrible scar on his forehead. The baby had a concussion and slept for days after the accident. James too had a concussion, and shattered his arm. Lily had been in a coma for nearly a month.

They nearly died that Halloween, James and Lily shudder at the thought of everything they could have lost. And they are thankful everyday for the family that they have.

The following year they decided to make Halloween into a happy memory. That morning Lily had taken a pregnancy test and a pink plus sign glared back at her. She cried for most of the morning, frustrated with her inability to use contraception. James was quick to ease Lily’s frustrations, reminding her that they wanted more kids in the future anyways, and that Harry was unplanned and ‘look at how good we are at making babies’. They took Harry Trick or Treating for the first time, dressed in a dog costume and laughed at Uncle Sirius’ tricks.

Afterwards they eloped, James had declared that they waited long enough, and they found a twenty four hour chapel. Halloween was the anniversary of when they met, and when they became a family. It was the day their family lived, and the day that their family was growing. It was the perfect day to get married.

Halloween in 2020 would be different of course. Harry and Hannah hadn’t bought costumes that year, and Sophie would miss out on her first chance to go trick or treating. Lily sat at her kitchen table and thought about this sadly, she had a few hours left before Harry and Hannah left and she wanted to make the most of it.

“Would you like to watch a movie?” She asked, smiling at her kids as they finished cleaning up from their afternoon tea.

“Erm.” Harry said, anxious to get upstairs on his Xbox before he left tonight.

“Han? C’mon guys. We never get time like this. We can watch something scary.”

Hannah agreed, and after Lily said she would make cheesy popcorn, Harry agreed too.

James joined them, and excitedly picked out The Conjuring declaring that Hannah was old enough to watch it.

Lily sat contently, as her daughter curled up next to her and they shared a bowl of popcorn. She observed James as he sat cross legged on the floor, leaning up against the couch, throwing popcorn at Harry.

Lily dozed off after a while, and her family dared not to wake her. Once the credits rolled, Lily stirred and found Harry and Hannah at the front door with their overnight bags.

“Behave.” She told Harry sternly, “I don’t want any calls from Mrs.Weasley tonight. Got it?”

“Got it.”

“I’ll keep an eye on him Mum.”

“Please don’t.” James interjected, “that will just cause a fight. Don’t embarrass yourselves.”

Hannah rolled her eyes, and Lily laughed as she planted one last kiss on her daughter’s forehead.

“Any requests for dinner love?” James asked her before leaving to drive the kids to the Weasley's.

“Something fried.” Lily said, shutting the door behind him.

By the end of the night Lily was ready to sleep for a century. Once James had returned with bags of take-away, she had eaten her weight in fish and chips and spent the rest organizing the nursery. James had mastered putting cribs together by now, and had easily built this new one within an hour. He had put together the dresser, and was now working on the changing table while Lily began to organize the drawers of the dresser.

“You know this is probably going to be the last time we are alone for a long time.” James said, sitting down on the floor and throwing his tools back into the tool box.

“Yeah.” She bit her lip sadly, things were about to get chaotic. They both knew that when they decided to have a fourth baby. “I just wish this was happening at a different time. I mean I won’t even be able to give birth in a hospital. It’s really scary.”

“It’ll be alright.” He said, she moved to sit down next to him. It was awkward of course, she moved slowly, and James reached his arm around her waist to help steady her to the ground. She sat with her legs stretched out infront of her, and her hands resting carelessly on top of her belly.

“Just a few more weeks.” James mused, setting his hand on top of hers. “Are you nervous?”

“Very.” She nodded.

“Me too. But it’ll be fine.” He willed himself to believe it. He had hoped that the pandemic would have been controlled enough by now that Lily would be able to go to the hospital to deliver their baby. But her doctor had advised against it, saying that Lily was healthy enough to deliver on her own and to do so in a hospital would be an unnecessary risk.

“We have a plan for the moment labor starts. Mum, Sirius, and Marlene are ready to spring into action the second we call them.” James spoke simply, the best way to calm down a spiraling Lily was to talk her through it.

He turned his head to kiss her on the temple, and he softly whispered into her hair. “You’ve done this three times already Lil. You’re great at it. Everything will be okay.”

“I guess it will be kinda nice being at home this time. And in my own bed.” She said lowly.

“See? Look on the bright side. And just think love, in a few weeks she’ll be here and things will be better. I promise you.”

Lily looked at him incredulously, “she?”

“Yea. She. It’s a girl, I know it.”

“It’s a boy James. We’ve talked about this.”

“Blah blah. ‘Mothers intuition’ and all that.” He rolled his eyes, “you have been wrong about our other two girls. I don’t trust your intuition.”

“I want Harry to have a brother. It’s not fair he’s going to be outnumbered.”

“You and Hannah were outnumbered for years.” James laughed, reminding her of the years spent with Sirius and Remus as part of her family.

“Exactly! I don’t want Harry to feel like that.”

“Whatever, I’m happy with whatever we get. Even if it means you're wrong.”

She was wrong of course. Her baby came later that night, weeks before her due date, and after hours of screaming at James for putting her in this spot; she gave birth to a tiny, precious girl.

They called her Phoebe, she was small, and wrinkly and very pink. She had a mess of thick black hair and her tiny fingers curled around Lily’s finger while she held her daughter in adoration.

Labor came suddenly, and Lily couldn’t remember her other children hurting this badly. She laid in her bed and cried for her Mother, while James panicked. He called Marlene over, she was a nurse and Lily had insisted that she would only feel comfortable giving birth at home if Marlene was there to act as a midwife.

By midnight Lily was crying into James' chest as she pushed her daughter out into the world.

James held Lily tight, as Lily held her daughter to her chest and began to feed her. He took a quick picture of the newborn, and sent it to Harry and his mother. And whispered to Lily, “you did amazing. Again.”

She looked up at him, smiling wildly. “Shes lovely James, we did this.”

“Well obviously. But you did the hard part.”

“It’s okay.” She sighed, labor had been a bitch. She was horribly sore, and exhausted. She smiled down at the baby in her arms, “it was worth it.”

“Happy anniversary love.” He said.

“Happy Halloween.” She beamed at him.

Halloween was good for the Potter family. They had another happy Halloween story to add to their collection, the day Phoebe was born.

This year may have been shit, but it was ending happily within the chaos of the Potter home.

“Happy Birthday.” James leaned down and kissed his daughter's tiny head.

[k-writer1998]

Who Said Love Was Easy? (11/12)

      There are many different kinds of people who come and go from your life. Some will stay constant and sturdy like a river, growing alongside you, others will come like a whirlwind who wreaks havoc and leaves just as quickly, then there is everything in between. In this twisted maze of connections, that is where our story begins. A steadfast boy, a girl with a past, a little bit of alcohol, mistakes, and some love. Where can you go wrong with that?

angsty fluff

w.c: 1.7k

tw: mentions/ allusion to abuse

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeongin's POV

      What just… my mind was reeling at everything going on as I stared down at the folder in my hand. When did I get it back? How- No, shake it off I have to attend a meeting when I get back. But y/n, she- Stop, gotta get back now…

      Safe to say everything blurred by after that. I didn’t even really realize I was home until I heard the door slam behind me before I was greeted with silence yet again. I collapsed on the couch with a sigh as I covered my eyes. Although I was tired and just wished to sleep, instead my mind played back today’s incident. This wasn’t the first time we’ve argued but this was different, it was the full force of our frustrations and anger. Then there was the fear… the flinch playing back in my mind on an endless loop. After seeing her brother do that then everything at the dinner, I should’ve known but I never thought- don’t make excuses for yourself… What am I even doing right now, arguing with myself?

      A couple days passed and it felt like I was woken from a haze. There were certain aspects of this job I liked but a lot was just something I didn’t want to do. I knew this from the beginning but why has it been so much more prominent in my mind now? Then there was the topic of Gahyeon. For as long as I’ve had my feelings for her, she equaled my happiness. I’ve always wanted to have that smile so filled with love turned to me but when I started to notice it faced someone else, I started to panic. Was it because I was losing her or was it because I was losing what I considered to be my happiness? My head was a mess but thankfully Seungmin invited me over for dinner today and maybe it could take a break before my brain fried itself. Seungmin noticed my worries as I was pulled from my thoughts by him knocking on the table. 

“If you keep staring at the fire like that it’ll end up eating you. What’s on your mind?”

“Hyung…” I explained the whole argument, leaving out the part involving buying the building, to Seungmin who silently nodded along. A few beats of silence passed when I finished before he spoke. 

“This was probably inevitable considering both of you are stubborn but it did escalate further than needed. After having a few days to think about it, do you have some regrets?”

“I mean yeah but the more I think about it the more confused I get. Maybe hearing an outside view would help? I don’t know. I mean my brain can’t burn out more than it already has right?”

“It’s okay using your brain was never your strong suit.”

“Yah hyung!”

“But anyways,” he ignored, “since you’ve been at the company have you been happy? In general or with yourself?”

“Not really…”

“Well when was the last time you were?”

“When I was working at the pub.”

“Why?”

“Everyone treated me as an equal.”

“And?”

“And everyone one was really nice.”

“And?”

“And what else?! Seungmin-hyung, get to the point.”

“Really not your strong point,” He sighs as he continued, “you were happy there because they treated you like family. Something you haven’t felt since the divorce I may add.”

“Ouch…” That one stung. 

“Hey, don’t make me look like the bad guy. We’ve gone over the whole “family” issue enough through our friendship that I can at least say that much. Now the subject of Gahyeon, as your best friend I think whatever thing you had for Gahyeon died.”

      I wanted to argue but I can’t wholeheartedly deny that fact. I’ve felt the doubt in regards to my feelings swimming in my mind since before the argument but I’ve lived like that for so long I didn’t know how to stop myself. I groaned. 

“Am I an idiot?”

“In this situation and in general… yeah. I’m sure you didn’t notice but when I asked why the pub made you happy, you didn’t mention Gahyeon.”

      At the realization I ruffled my hair in frustration. He’s right yet again. Why did I think talking with Seungmin would make me feel better? Our friendship was built off tough love. Now the only thing he hasn’t jabbed at me for was y/n… All I ever do is accuse her whenever we disagree, like a child throwing a tantrum. I’ve only been thinking about myself this whole time and ignored her feelings, like an ass. Before my brain could spiral down to the flinch once again, Seungmin snapped me out of it once again.

“So are we gonna talk about the biggest fault or are you gonna pretend you don’t see that too?”

“I know I shouldn’t have accused her like that… or entered her space so suddenly. I was selfish and hated the thought of losing the argument.”

“At least you know why you were wrong, one less lecture on my part.”

“Wow, whose best friend are you?” I rolled my eyes.

“Yours, that’s why I’ll call you out when you need to be. Y/n never took advantage of your weak moments when something happened with Gahyeon and I’ll tell you this, whenever we talk about you it’s because she’s worried.”

“Thanks… you’re really helping me feel better.”

“Tone down the sarcasm and maybe I’ll help you fix things.”

      We continued to talk over the grilled meat and by the time I came home, I knew what I had to do. The first being to find out explicitly what happened in y/n’s past while I try to fix the biggest mistake. After a few days I met Jaehyung in a café, might as well start where I first heard it right? We caught up a bit with him complaining I needed to come by more often before I brought it up.

“Hyung I don’t mean to be nosey but what happened last year that made you so worried about y/n on her birthday?”

“Ah! Did something happen when you went to dinner with her?!” 

“Nothing like last time,” I quickly reassured before clarifying, “they were just very… condescending to say the least.”

“Sorry, I worry about y/n cause she’ll never say anything if something happens,” he apologized as the tension that shot to his shoulders left just as quickly.

“Yeah she does, that’s why I ended up coming to you.”

“She wouldn’t like me talking about it but it’s because you guys are so close and you practically know already that I’ll tell you.”

      Although he said that as a compliment I felt it jab at me. No, we’ve been over this. Hating yourself won’t fix anything and we have a plan so let’s just stick to it. 

“Thanks hyung.”

“Other than the incident from last year, a lot of it is speculation on my part. I was only given the bare minimum because I saw it happen so I don’t have much.”

      Y/n has been a bit skittish lately for some reason. I know it’s around her birthday but she never acted like this, although it wasn’t really her favorite day either. She has been ignoring someone it seems though. There are times at the pub where her phone rings and her nose scrunches in distaste before she rejects the call or deletes the text. I’ve heard hushed arguments pass through our relatively thin walls but I can never really catch what was going on. That girl really worries me, she doesn’t let anyone in and hides behind snarky comments and sarcasm. I grabbed her some cake on the way home, hopefully she’ll feel a bit better. Exiting the elevator, groceries in hand, I was surprised to spot unfamiliar people leaving y/n’s apartment since she only has a small circle of friends that hasn’t changed much since I’ve known her. Judging by the older woman and two others who look like her, were they y/n’s family? Before I could call out to y/n, my voice caught in my throat at what happened at that moment and my body froze. The older woman grabbed a fist full of y/n’s hair, forcing her to face her, and that was when I noticed the other marks along her face and arms. In that instance our eyes connected and her eyes widened in fear as she shook her head ever so slightly. The woman noticed the motion and cocked her head. Y/n didn’t want me seen so before the woman turned to look I turned the corner and pressed myself against the wall. As I heard their footsteps approach me I quickly pushed the elevator button to make it seem like I just got off. I breezed by them with my head down and practically threw my groceries in my house before ringing y/n’s bell. Silence. With a sigh I entered her code and stormed in. There she was, sitting on the floor of her living room. It was the first time she ever looked so weak, even flinching as the door closed.

“You know how she is. Y/n doesn’t like to show her weakness to others and rarely does she cry in front of someone. That day she cried her eyes out and stopped putting up her act for once.”

“So they really…”

“Mhmm. Can’t say for how long but it was enough. Probably had it worse too, seeming as though the cut on her lip, nail marks on her arms, and the bruises didn’t phase her all that much.”

“Sorry hyung, it must be unpleasant to bring it up again but thank you for telling me.”

      There was a lot to process with that and a lot of things were starting to connect clearly now. God, I suck. I can’t ask her to forgive me but maybe at least with what I have planned she can hate me a little less? I’m not sure what I’m trying to accomplish with this but I do know I don’t want to lose y/n as a friend.

[dreamingofmilk]

Change

Synopsis: After being holed up with Bucky for a while you were excited for a girls night with your friends. Too bad Bucky had other plans.

Warnings: Cursing

Word Count: 1540

ENJOY!!

You were so excited. It was Friday night, and you were going out with your girls for a night on the town. You and Bucky have been boo’d up for a while, and your friends were complaining because they never saw you. The honeymoon phase of the relationship hit both of you HARD. You both couldn’t keep your hands, and other parts, off of each other. But you promised your friends that tonight they would have you all to themselves.

You went online shopping last weekend and bought a really sexy dress to go out with your friends in. The lingerie you wore underneath it had been bought more for Bucky’s benefit than yours. You couldn’t wait for him to see it when you made it back home. You made sure to buy the one in his favorite color.

The dress itself was your favorite color, and it hugged your body in all the right places. Just short enough to tease but long enough that you didn’t have to worry about a wardrobe malfunction once you got drunk. You took the last sip of the alcohol concoction Bucky had made for you to pregame with. You breathed a sigh of relief relaxing and stretching your fingers as you had just finished your hair and makeup. You grabbed your coat and made your way downstairs to say goodnight to Bucky.

He was sprawled on the couch watching the game. He had on those damned grey sweatpants, the ones that made his dick look extra good. The temptation made part of you said ‘fuck tonight, let’s just sit in his lap and get some action’, but you knew you’d never hear the end of it from your friends, so you sucked up your growing horniess and ignored the growing wetness in your underwear. You made your way over to him and leaned down to give him a kiss. “I’m leaving now babe. I won’t be back until pretty late so don’t wait up for me.”

He shook his head and met your eyes, a slight pout on his lips, “You know I can’t sleep without you. I don’t mind waiting up for you.” As he finished his thought, he finally took in your outfit. “Wait, Y/N. What are you wearing?”

You backed up and spun for him, “It’s cute right?” Fashion Nova really outdid themselves with this one.

He frowned, “You look good in anything, you know that. This dress is on another level though. You look sexy as fuck baby.” He took a while to really look you over, taking in all of the parts of your outfit that caught his attention. His smirk quickly morphed into a gaze that could melt steel. ”Change.”

You clutched your pearls, and almost choked on your words “Excuse me? Last I checked I was a grown woman. I’m gonna wear whatever the fuck I want Barnes! I don’t give a damn if I went to the club buck naked!” You’d be damned if he tried to police what you wear. This dress was cute as fuck and you took hours to get ready for tonight. There was no way he was going to ruin your night before it really got started.

Bucky stood up and got in your face. “Y/N it seems you forgot who the fuck I am. Am I a fucking joke to you? Do you honestly think I’m playing with you? You’ll do what the fuck I tell you to! I’ll be damned if my girl goes to a club without me looking like that.” Bucky gestured wildly to your outfit.

You scoffed loudly and rolled your eyes. “You don’t run me Barnes.” You whispered quietly.

Bucky stood up menacingly, his body towering over yours. A dark chuckle left his soft pink lips.

“Maybe I didn’t make myself clear. Either you take your pretty little ass upstairs and change or I’m going to make you and you’re gonna wish you could walk tomorrow.” By the time he finished he was so close your noses were touching and his metal hand was wrapped around your neck and tightening by the second.

Ok so maybe you didn’t think this through. On one hand, you did really want to wear this dress, and you didn’t like that he was forcing you not to wear it since you bought it for this night specifically. But now you were wet as fuck and lowkey didn’t even want to go to the club anymore. You wanted Bucky to fucking wreck you. God, what was wrong with you. What was this man doing to you?

You had to stay strong though. If you let him get away with this now, he’d think it was ok to do it all the time. And there was no way he’d agree with a lot of the things in your closet.

You looked him in the eyes, your teeth clenched, “Like I said, Barnes, I am grown and you are not going to tell me what to wear. If you’re going to have a temper tantrum whenever I go out without you, then we have a problem.” The hand on your throat tightened slightly.

Bucky’s metal hand moved down your neck to the sweetheart neckline of your dress. His face apologetic. “You’re right, I’m sorry babe. I just don’t like the idea of all those guys coming up to you. You’re mine.”

You grabbed his face and gave him several short kisses, “I know, and I understand that baby, I do, but you have to trust me. You know I’m not going to entertain anybody but you.” You gave him a long sloppy kiss, hoping it would help calm him down. When you pulled away, he was smiling.

“You’re right, and I know you won’t entertain any of them. Because you won’t be able to.” And with that he gripped the neckline of your dress and pulled straight down, ripping the dress in half. You watched in shock as he completely tore the fabric apart, all with one pull.

You went to hit him. “You fucking asshole! That was a brand new dress!”

He caught your hand right before it could connect. “I told you if you didn’t change I was going to make you change. I meant what the fuck I said Y/N. Now since you can’t follow directions I guess I have to take care of that too.”

Bucky took a step back to admire you. The look in his eyes made your nipples harden under the lace of the new bra you wore.

“Damn you look good. All this for me baby?” He pulled you close and gripped your ass.

You struggled to pull away.

“It was! Before you decided to be an asshole get off of me. Now I need to go change!”

Bucky smirked as he picked up your clutch and reached into it. He pulled out your phone. You tried to take it back but he held it out of reach and grabbed both of your wrists with his other hand holding them tightly behind your back. You started yelling, “Bucky give me my fucking phone! You play too much!”

“You better watch who you’re talking to. You’re about to get yourself into some shit you can’t handle. I already told you Y/N. I’m not playing with you. Talk to me like I’m one of your little friends again and watch what happens.”

He unlocked your phone then hit a few buttons on your phone and put it up to his ear. After a few seconds he started talking, “Hey, Mona, yeah Y/N won’t be able to make it tonight. She’s coming down with some kind of virus. Yeah I know, she was looking forward to tonight too. Don’t worry I’ll take good care of her. Alright, have fun ladies. Have a few rounds of drinks on me. Goodnight.”

You were seething by the time he hung up. This man was insane! “Why the fuck did you cancel on them?! I’ve been looking forward to tonight all week Bucky!”

He picked you up and threw you over his shoulder, making the trek up the stairs. Your stomach dropped as you realized where this was going. “Because like I said you can’t seem to follow directions, so since you insist on wearing revealing clothes. I’m gonna give you something to reveal. I’m gonna mark every inch of your body baby. We’ll see how revealing you are with hickies and bruises all over you.”

Two Weeks Later

You were finally able to reschedule a night out with your girls. Happy to see them and a bit sore for Bucky’s morning escapades, you meet them at Mona’s house for a night of fun.

“Y/N, you made it! We haven’t seen you in forever!” Mona ran up to give her a tight hug. Once she registered your outfit, her face scrunched up in disgust. “Y/N why the fuck do you have a hoodie and sweatpants on?”

You growled, “It’s a long story.”

Masterlist: @chaneajoyyy​ @aislinnsilver​ @wawakanda-btch​ @marvelmaree​

[ineffable-snowman]

Day 12 & 13: Carolling & Wrapping Paper

combining two prompts again to catch up

***

There were two rolls of wrapping papers in Brother Francis’s little garden hut: a silver one with little angels and a tartan one.

The two harmless objects upset Crowley so much that she stormed out of the hut without getting the woollen coat as intended (who needed a coat anyway, it wasn’t that cold, coats were for wimps, not for demons!). She stormed through the garden, kicking a bush who had dared to grow out of line (who Aziraphale had let grow out of line). Out of spite, she set fire to the fairy lights, thus effectively shutting down the whole building’s electricity. There was confused shouting from the dark mansion but that was not her problem anymore, she had the weekend off.

Time to get drunk in a bar. You see, in 2000 years Crowley had never gotten a Christmas present from Aziraphale, even though she gave one to Aziraphale most years when they were in the same area. It was alright, she understood why Aziraphale did not give her anything. Because a present would be physical proof of not only a working but also a personal relationship. She knew that Aziraphale, if he were free from Heaven, would gladly give her presents. Aziraphale liked giving presents: giving the humans his flaming sword, bestowing blessings, putting food outside for a hedgehog, giving money to a beggar… But Heaven did not always allow him to give as much as he wanted.

It used to be alright. And Crowley did get something in return: a grateful and happy smile and an invitation into the bookshop for a drink or two. It was enough, more than enough. Just – seeing the wrapping paper had thrown Crowley for a loop. Imagining Aziraphale thoughtfully selecting Christmas presents and wrapping them for some random people – for whom? Warlock, that was okay, Crowley herself had bought the little Antichrist a spooky musical box with a skeleton on top of it. But also for Mrs. Dowling and her idiot husband? Maybe for the cook and the cleaning staff, too? Humans Aziraphale had barely known for a few years? It felt stupid. Crowley felt stupid. She didn’t even like Christmas. And anything Aziraphale would give her would probably only clutter up her flat and not go with her style at all. She didn’t need soppy Christmas presents, a glass of Whiskey would do just fine. But…imagining Aziraphale carefully wrapping something for her, putting a bow on top, adding a name tag…

Well, look who was soppy now.

Next Monday, she told Mrs. Dowling that she would be fine to stay for the holidays.

“Oh really?” She looked immensely relieved. Christmas usually put humans through a lot of stress (some of which Crowley was responsible for). “I thought you wanted to go home to celebrate Christmas with…um…?”

“I don’t have family. Or anyone else to celebrate Christmas with.”

Aziraphale chose that precise moment to come into the hall. Crowley quickly looked away.

“Then you are very welcome to stay with us, of course,” said Mrs. Dowling. She then went off to work.

Aziraphale cleared his throat. “I take it you’re not coming over to the bookshop then? On Christmas, that is?”

“No time,” Crowley said.

“Well. I’m sure Warlock will be delighted to have you here with him.”

“We’ll see about that.”

“I suppose there’s really no reason for the gardener to stay for Christmas, is there?”

Crowley averted her eyes because she hated to see Aziraphale looking so sad. She realised that Aziraphale did not have anyone to celebrate Christmas with either. “It’s not like we do anything special for Christmas when we meet. I mean, we eat, drink, talk – same things we always do, right?”

“Yes, of course. Anyway. I’ll get to work.”

Crowley snorted. “Sure.” As if Aziraphale ever did any work in the garden aside from feeding the birds and talking to slugs.

***

Christmas with the Dowlings wasn’t exactly a fun affair. On the 25th they were hosting a huge dinner party but as Mr. Dowling was on an important Christmas party every day and every night, all the preparations were left to Mrs. Dowling (and in turn to the overworked staff). Warlock was keyed up because he could not wait to finally get his presents. The atmosphere could not really be described as festive. Crowley tried to teach Warlock how a clock and a calendar worked and how to tell the time so he would stop pestering everyone by asking when it was finally time to unbox his presents.

Christmas morning was still tolerable. Warlock enjoyed most of his presents (even the boring storybook wrapped in tartan paper) and only threw a minor tantrum when he did not get the right Star Wars action figure. The Dowlings gave Crowley a completely useless gift voucher for a spa treatment. Warlock also had something for her, and it was wrapped in tartan paper, making Crowley’s hands shake a little when she unwrapped it. It was a hastily drawn picture that was labelled in a familiar handwriting: it said “Warlock” next to the biggest stick figure, “Nanny” next to a slightly smaller and black stick figure, “sun” next to a yellow oval and “birds” next to a blue…well, scribble.

“Ah, very minimalist, very abstract, I like it.” Crowley tousled Warlock’s hair and swallowed down the lump in her throat. Then she carefully rolled the paper up and safely put it away.

By midday, the Dowling’s were having an argument again and the cook was close to a mental breakdown (Crowley smuggled the gift voucher for the spa treatment into her bag). Warlock stayed with Crowley when his parents were shouting in the living room, and that meant Crowley could not even get drunk on the eggnog in peace. There was a loud bang from the front door, than the crunching of the gravel as a car sped away. Warlock was trying to behead his action figure. It was ridiculous, what was Crowley even doing here? The world was about to end in a few years and she moped and Aziraphale was lonely in his bookshop and the humans argued over wrong presents and dinner parties that they did not even enjoy, and the present for Aziraphale was in the Bentley’s glove compartment.

“How do you feel about going outside?” Crowley suggested.

Warlock nodded in relief.

When they ran across Mrs. Dowling in the hall, she quickly wiped her tears away and put on a brave smile.

“Do you mind if Warlock and I head out for a bit?” Crowley asked.

“That’s a good idea, thank you, Miss Ashtoreth. What are you going to do?”

“Er, sleighing,” Crowley said the first thing that came to her mind but of course there was no snow in London, “I mean, carolling.” Or whatever it was humans usually did on Christmas.

“Oh, that sounds lovely.” Then she lowered her voice so only Crowley could hear her. “It’d probably be better if you stayed away for a bit longer until, you know, things are back under control here.”

“No problem.”

Mrs. Dowling exhaled in relief. “You really are a godsend, Miss Ashtoreth.”

Crowley winced but managed to control herself.

“What’s carolling?” Warlock asked later from the backseat of the Bentley.

“Eh, we go to some houses and sing Christmas songs very badly and only stop if they give us money or sweets.”

Warlock was all for it and they spent the drive changing the lyrics of several Christmas songs to make them more interesting.

It was fun, standing primly and serenely next to Warlock while he sang the most outrageous lyrics with his cute face. Most people were so out of their depth that they just didn’t say anything but simply gave him sweets and threw Crowley somewhat nervous looks.

When Warlock grew bored and cold, Crowley suggested they go and see Brother Francis. Aziraphale was thoroughly taken aback when they knocked on his door and Warlock was pretty confused, too.

“What happened to your eyebrows, Brother Francis?”

“Oh, I – I trimmed them. For the holiday.”

“And your teeth?”

“Hm?” Aziraphale quickly turned aside and then turned back with his large front teeth miracled back on. “Whatever do you mean, Master Warlock?”

“You look different!”

“Why don’t you come inside?”

“We must carolling first!”

“Carolling, how lovely! What are you going to sing, young Warlock?”

“Jingle hell.”

“Oh dear.”

Nevertheless, Aziraphale listened through the whole song (but sometimes winced slightly). “I believe we have to practise the lyrics a bit”, he said afterwards. “It seems like Nanny mixed up a few things.”

Warlock giggled. “I’m not stupid, Brother Francis. I know that’s not the real song. We changed it.”

“Well. Ahem. What would you say to some hot cocoa?”

Warlock was all for it, and Crowley could not believe she was spending Christmas with her hereditary enemy and the Antichrist drinking hot cocoa that did not even have alcohol in it. It was ridiculous but not nearly as ridiculous as the morning at the Dowlings’.

Aziraphale asked Warlock about his presents and the boy went on another rant about the wrong action figure he had gotten. A few minutes and a gentle lecture from Aziraphale later, Warlock gladly handed Aziraphale the action figure, who planned to give it to some poor kid who had not gotten anything for Christmas. Crowley supposed it was only fair if Aziraphale was allowed to do some influencing towards the good after she had taught Warlock rude carols, so she let Aziraphale do his angelic job now.

Then Warlock went to explore the bookshop, which had Aziraphale on edge. He hovered behind Warlock and shooed him away whenever he got too close to any of his books. “Ah, Master Warlock, these books are really not for young children. They are very old, very boring, you wouldn’t like them. I could –” he frantically looked around until he found what he was looking for “– I could read this to you.” He brandished a first edition of Winnie-the-Pooh.

It was ridiculous enough that there was no alcohol in her hot cocoa but now Crowley was even listening to Aziraphale reading Winnie-the-Pooh, enthusiastically doing all the voices.

“This is boring,” she hissed, “there isn’t even anyone dying.”

“It’s not boring,” Warlock protested. “Come on, Brother Francis, read!”

Aziraphale gave Crowley a smug smile. Crowley didn’t really mind. She just had to, you know, protest for the sake of it – like Aziraphale had to protest against rude carols.

It did not take long for Warlock to fall asleep on the couch. Crowley would have liked to stay but it was already getting late.

“Suppose we should head back,” she said softly.

“Ah, yes. His parents might worry.” Aziraphale wrapped Warlock up in a tartan blanket and Crowley picked him up. “Thank you for coming over,” Aziraphale whispered. “It was nice having you here.”

Crowley did not really know what to say to that, so she just sneered in return and hoped it did not look too nice. She had unobtrusively left the present for Aziraphale in the kitchen when she had gotten them more hot cocoa while Aziraphale had been reading to Warlock. She really wanted to stay.

“So what are you up to now?” Aziraphale asked.

“Get the little hellspawn into bed, see if there’s any decent food from the party left, tempt a few of the politicians there – the usual stuff. You?”

“I’m going to bring a few presents to the children in the neighbourhood who didn’t get anything.” Aziraphale nodded towards the huge bag with presents, to which he had added Warlock’s action figure.

“Ah. Good deeds.” Crowley tried to sneer again. She was not sure if she succeeded. She never wanted it all to end, not even Christmas, hot cocoa, Winnie-the-Pooh and Aziraphale’s good deeds. She also didn’t mind chaotic Christmas parties and rude carols but she really liked all of this, this crazy, exciting little planet and all the humans and the angel on it. “So, er, merry Christmas or whatever.”

“And happy holidays to you, too. Oh, and thank you for the present.”

So he had already noticed. Crowley could feel herself blushing. “Shut up.”

[cottontail20]

The Domestic Life Of The Vision And His Witch, Chapter 20: Forgiveness

Summary:  The twins' playdate with The Hulk brings up old regrets for Wanda.

Ao3 link:https://archiveofourown.org/works/18461504/chapters/48455771

With Clint's help, Wanda and Vision managed to build a suitable large, hopefully sturdy enough Playpen for Tommy and his large green friend. Tomorrow Morning, they would set out some suitable toys, and hopefully, all would be well.

"Are you guys really sure this Playdate with The Hulk is a good idea?" Clint asked as they were finishing up.

"Well.." Vision hesitated, but he trusted Wanda's judgement. "It's not a bad idea.."

"We wouldn't have agreed if we thought it was going to end badly" said Wanda.

"Your call" Clint shrugged. "I mean, I trust Bruce entirely. Bruce is just the kind of guy that you trust. The Hulk, though.. When he's on your side, he's great. But when he's not, well.. It was only four years ago that he rampaged through a city.."

Wanda's cheeks suddenly flushed, a memory rising in her mind. --

"I want to finish the plan. I want the big one."

Wanda remembered invading Bruce Banner's mind as he waited in the Quinjet. Probing deep into his psyche, poking and prodding at the very worst of his memories to spark true fury inside him, drawing out the very worst version of the Hulk.

She remembered Bruce looking at her, in the final moments before he transformed, the tainted Hulk taking over. He'd looked so scared.

"You should run.. now.."

Pietro had scooped her up, speeding them both out of harm's way.

And for just a moment, Wanda felt guilty. But the guilt hadn't fully taken hold, not then. After all, he was one of them.. the enemy.. --

Now though, things were very different, especially since she had truly gotten to know Bruce Banner. Now, the fear in his eyes haunted her. The Hulk that had attacked that day wasn't really The Hulk.

Clint was still voicing his concerns, and Wanda's guilt and shame bubbled over.

"It wasn't Hulk's fault!" she snapped. Billy, still strapped to her chest, whined a little.

"What?" Clint jumped slightly at her raised voice.

"You should remember, Clint. You stopped me before I got to you.. The Hulk only attacked that City because of me!" Wanda stormed off, back inside the cottage. --

Once inside, Wanda took a deep, calming breath. Billy, whining again, reached up a little hand to try and touch his Mother's cheek. Wanda managed a small smile at his comforting gesture, unbuckling the carrier so she could cuddle her son properly.

"Mama has done some bad things, Una pretioasa.." She whispered, kissing the top of his head. She wouldn't hide them from the twins. When they were old enough, they would talk about it, hopefully understand, and she could keep her boys from making the same mistakes.

A few minutes later, Vision entered the cottage. Tommy was whimpering, trying to reach for Wanda. He unbuckled him from the carrier, and Wanda sat down so she could more easily hold both boys, settling them in her lap when Vision handed Tommy over.

"Clint went home" He explained gently, sitting beside Wanda and draping an arm around her shoulders. "He said to tell you that he feels like an idiot, and he's sorry."

"I shouldn't have snapped.."

"I think he understands.. So do I. You're sensitive about these things. What you did then is so far from who you really are.."

"But I still did it.."

"You did" Vision kissed her temple. "But everyone has forgiven you and put it behind them. Perhaps you should too."

"Voi incerca" Wanda sighed. "But it is not easy.." --

The next Morning, Natasha Romanoff woke up, jumping out of her skin when she saw The Hulk sitting at the foot of her bed. She'd only just managed to stop herself reaching for her gun.

"What the hell, Big guy? That is not cool!"

"Playdate" said Hulk, innocently oblivious as to why it was wrong to sneak into Natasha's room while she was sleeping. "'Tasha take Hulk."

"Yeah.. Yeah, I'm taking you" Nat murmured, blinking sleep from her eyes. "Just give me a few minutes, okay?"

"'Kay." The Hulk didn't move.

"Uh.. I'm gonna need you to wait outside, big guy" Natasha almost blushed. "It was warm last night, and I'm not wearing pants.."

Hulk finally seemed to get the hint, stomping out into the hall, and Nat breathed a sigh of relief. --

Not too much later, just as they were done setting out toys, the Quinjet landed near Wanda and Vision's cottage.

The playdate had been going remarkably well so far. Tommy sped around the big playpen, happily showing off his toys to his new big green friend. Billy, a little uncertain at first, had joined in on the fun and games as well. However, Billy had not yet mastered the ability to crawl to the level that his brother had, so whenever Tommy would move on to the next attraction, The Hulk would, gently, scoop Billy into the palm of his large hand and follow Tommy.

Vision was currently supervising, while Wanda had taken Nat inside to get her something to eat since The Hulk's eagerness to get to his playdate had made her miss breakfast. Still, Wanda kept one eye on things through the window.

"He's not really a monster anymore, is he?"

"The Hulk?" Nat munched on a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "Kind of a big sweetie once he knows you. Just.. think of him like a toddler permanently on the verge of a temper tantrum. Keep him happy, and you're all good."

"Right.. bine de stiut.." Wanda murmured. Having the Hulk described as basically a child definitely didn't help with her guilt.

"So" Natasha continued nonchalantly, "Clint called last night. He was worried about you.."

"He doesn't need to worry. Just.. what he said.."

"Hey, we've all made mistakes. Some worse than others, but we've all made them. We know you regret what you did, there's no reason to keep beating yourself up over it."

"I know.." Wanda sighed. "But that particular mistake.. It feels so much worse, because I know Bruce now, and he's just.. so sweet.."

"He is" Nat nodded. "I have similar regrets about him, if that helps."

"You have?"

"Mmhm. On the Helicarrier, right before Bruce hulked out, he looked so afraid. Not so much for himself, but for me. And for a moment, I thought I never should have brought him in. But, if we hadn't had the Hulk during the battle of New York.." Natasha shuddered a little. "Point is, sometimes things just happen the way they're meant to."

"I suppose so.." Wanda glanced back out the window. "I've apologised to Bruce, but I hurt The Hulk too. I just wish I knew how to say I'm sorry.."

"Well.. go try."

"What?"

"Talk to the Big Guy" Nat slapped a hand on Wanda's shoulder, nodding towards the window. "I think you'll be surprised how much he understands." --

Taking Nat's advice, Wanda slowly made her way outside. Vision was still supervising, seeming a lot more relaxed about the situation than he had been the day before.

"How's it going?" She asked him.

"All well" Vision replied. "Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves."

"That's good. Do you think they'd mind if I crashed the playdate for a minute?"

"No. I'm sure the boys would love a visit from Mama."

Wanda swung a leg over the playpen, climbing inside, and made her way over to him. Currently, all three were playing with building blocks. Of course, Hulk's building block's were actually some old crates that Clint had had lying around. The twins' block tower had was a little higher than either of them could comfortably reach, so Tommy was now handing the blocks to Billy, who used his powers to levitate them to the top of the tower.

"Hello, you three" Wanda sat down near them.

Billy cooed happily and began, slowly, crawling over to her. This annoyed Tommy, who had no way of adding to the tower without his brother.

"Hi, Twins' Mama" The Hulk replied.

"Hulk, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?"

"'Kay.." Hulk seemed a little confused.

"I.. I hurt you once" Wanda began, a little nervously. "When I forced you to come out. I wanted to say I was sorry.."

The Hulk stared at Wanda for a moment, confused. Then, he looked surprised.

"You.. Different then.." Hulk stared at her still, unsure he was even seeing the same person. "Angry.."

"I was.."

Hulk was silent for a bit then shrugged.

"That okay."

"It is?" Wanda blinked, surprised.

"Hulk angry sometimes too.." He hesitated a moment. "Hulk come play with twins again?"

"Of course" Wanda nodded. She was left rather surprised when the Hulk shrank away, leaving Bruce in his place.

Natasha, who had come outside at some point, threw a shirt at him.

"Thanks, Nat!" Bruce called.

"You're welcome!" Nat called back.

Tommy, forgetting his annoyance with his brother at the sight of his Uncle Bruce, whom he loved as much as his big green alter ego, happily crawled into Bruce's lap. Bruce smiled at the little boy, then turned to Wanda.

"So, there's something the Hulk and I wanted to say, and he decided I'd probably be a bit more articulate in saying it.."

"Okay.."

"We forgive you, Wanda" said Bruce. "Me and the big guy.. we know better than anyone what anger can do. So I'm sorry too, for the time I threatened to strangle you."

"It's okay" Wanda smiled softly, shrugging. "I almost deserved it."

"No you.." Bruce was cut off by a familiar voice behind them. They turned to see Clint, clutching a plate with a peace offering.

"Hey, where's the Hulk?" He frowned. "I made a big green cake!"

Bruce and Wanda looked at each other.

"I could eat a piece of big green cake" Bruce shrugged.

"Yeah" Wanda replied with a smile. "Let's go eat cake."

Notes:

Translation:

Voi incerca: I'll try

bine de stiut: good to know.

[babywarg]

ironstrange fic: Star-Man

this fic is almost totally SFW, but in case it’s too much for tumblr's delicate sensibilities and i give it the vapors, i’ll be uploading it into my AO3 account soon.

also, taking the opportunity to announce that i have a twitter here: https://twitter.com/babywarg i'm sure this theme has been used in fic before, in a much better way...but i woke up this morning wanting to give mah boiz angst and would not be denied. title may or may not have been inspired by david bowie's song of the same name. that, plus the notion that people who go round in space age really, really slowly compared to us mere mortals. have you guys seen this uber-cute and uber-touching fan art by 黒雨? you really should. it may help set the tone for this fic. or not. but look at it anyway because it's uber-touching and uber-cute: https://twitter.com/blackrain_1019/status/1043466939480174592 many thanks once again to my wonderful beta @eclair <3 on to the dramu! ***

 Tony threw his arms out wide. "You wanted to see me, doc?"

The playful look on his face made it look like he was angling for a hug. But it wasn't a good time for hugs. Not right now.

"Tony," Stephen carefully began, "I'm going away for a while..."

Tony's arms fell to his side. A look of worry crossed his face.

"To where?" he asked. "How long?"

The questions sounded so innocent, they might as well have belonged to a 7-year-old boy who had no idea he was going to be abandoned by his parents. For good.

He almost seemed too young, too simple to understand what was going on - but those were words that had never before been used to describe Tony Stark.

"A long time," Stephen answered. "Something's come up. Can't we just leave it at that?"

Tony began to frown. He crossed his arms over his chest.

"I don't know, can we? Or maybe you know me better than that, Steve."

Steve. The name was a dagger in Stephen's chest. He should never have let Tony know about it. No one had called him that in years, and whenever Tony did it, he only ever did it with complete awareness of how much it hurt.

"I do know you better than that. You deserve an explanation."

"Damn right I do. And you better give me a straight one. No tricks."

Stephen avoided the dare, looked around. "Maybe we should sit."

"Maybe right here is fine." The tone was cold. But still a good deal warmer than unforgiving.

Stephen sighed, and obliged. "Tony...there's a presence approaching the Earth. It's strong. Very strong. I haven't found a way to repel it. The only thing I've found is that..."

"What?" Tony interrupted. "That it's useless for you to look up how to defeat it on your own?" His voice became softer, almost pleading. "Dude, you're an Avenger now, remember? You're part of a team. That means you get people to pass some of the hard labor on to."

Stephen had to smile. Tony prided himself on being the fix-it guy. He liked being hands-on. Thrived on it.

It was Tony's familiar way of saying "let me help you." But Stephen couldn't afford to listen.

"As the Earth's Sorcerer Supreme," Stephen softly replied, "I'm afraid all of the hard labor is on me."

He proceeded to explain that the presence was a uni-dimensional entity, drawn to planets with vast reserves of psychic power - in short, planets with their own Sorcerers Supreme to defend them.

It fed off psychic energy, and when it was done with one planet, it became more powerful, so that the next planet on its path only had less of a chance to survive. Somehow it was able to detect which planets had a Sorcerer Supreme less able to withstand its assault. It had already left several planets completely destroyed on its aimless journey, each planet's Sorcerers Supreme powerless against it.

There was only one way to avoid it...

And that was to pretend that the Earth had NO Sorcerer Supreme.

"Simply put, the creature needs to think the Earth isn't worth bothering with." There was no time to delve into the intricacies of psychic hierarchies, the fact that there were records in magical tomes of this having been done successfully by other Sorcerers Supreme before, laws on unstoppable objects vs immovable forces not applying to preternatural opponents...and of course the futility of moving the Earth out of the creature's path, so he chose to leave those little details out. "While I'm gone, I'll make sure that the Earth will be enveloped in a deceptive shield - sort of a large flashing sign that says 'Nope, no Sorcerers here, not an astrally advanced enough species' so that the entity, whenever it gets here, will move on."

"You didn't answer me," Tony acidly interrupted, and Stephen froze. "Where are you going? How long will you be gone?

"Other worlds. Maybe other dimensions. Being away gives me less of a chance of being ferreted out. And 20 years." He shrugged. "Give or take."

He didn't quite expect Tony's tantrum afterwards. Or maybe he did. He just never thought it would affect him as much.

"20 years?" Tony yelled, close to his face. "20 fucking years, Stephen?!"

At least it wasn't "Steve." That way, Stephen could take the heat.

Tony paced back and forth, fuming.

"What did you expect to hear from me? Good luck, have fun, bring me back a souvenir? Take me with you? I can't believe it, you're just telling me this! You didn't even think of asking me before making such a huge decision, did you? About asking the other Avengers?"

"I have no time to brainstorm with you, or with the rest of the team," Stephen answered calmly. "The entity is coming tonight. I need to get this done now."

"Get 'this' done? What --"

Stephen stepped up to Tony.

Planted his palm gently on Tony's forehead.

Whispered into Tony's ear, "Hush."

There was a brief flash of light where their skin made contact.

And it was over.

Memory spells aren't reliable, the Ancient One had said to him. You can pick and choose the memories you want gone, but there's no assurance they'll STAY gone. You'll have to live with the consequences, Stephen, no matter what.

Tony staggered back. Seemed disoriented for a minute.

Then, his gaze refocused, and he spread his arms wide.

"You wanted to see me, doc?"

There was no playfulness in his voice, this time. Only curiosity.

He'd come because he was summoned. By the Earth's Sorcerer Supreme.

Not by Stephen. Or Steve. Not by anyone he knew more intimately.

Stephen had to fight for the pain to not to reach his face.

One year of fights, of trysts, of kisses, stolen or otherwise, of promises and curses and unspoken vows.

Of love.

Gone.

"Tony," Stephen carefully began again. His voice might have broken slightly, but he hadn't meant it to. "I'm going away for a while."

 ***

 Time moves differently across universes and worlds, and there's much a Sorcerer Supreme could do in 20 Earth years. There were new species to meet, new magic to learn, many new things to discover.

In the meantime, Stephen drew only enough power from the energies around him (not the dark dimension: never that) so that he never aged, never slowed down.

At any rate, it was always a temporary arrangement.

It was the entity's fault for moving too goddamn slowly. 20 years was the minimum wait time for it to pass. If the psychic energy-eating behemoth had been moving faster, it wouldn't be as hard for anyone.

As it stood, Stephen had to wait it out. He had no contact with anyone from Earth, no one who might betray his location to the creature, or compromise his resolve to stay away. This meant Wong, Christine...or Tony Stark.

And then if, after 20 years, he returned to find the Earth in pieces, he planned on using the Time Stone to look back at where things went wrong, then to go back in time, and use the knowledge he'd acquired in all his years away to fix it.

But! If nothing bad had happened to the earth while he was gone...then, well, Doctor Strange's gamble had paid off.

No one knew that he and Tony had a sort of relationship, so no one else's memory needed to be wiped. All he had to take care of was Tony - headstrong, shrewd Tony, who would defy logic and move heaven and earth to find Stephen and be with him again...potentially leaving the Earth unprotected as he went on his futile search.

- that is, if he even remembered what he needed to find Stephen for.

Stephen’s reasoning was this: If Tony's memories of their year together were dealt with, there would be no complications. The Earth would never lose its best defender. And upon his return, they would just be friends again, colleagues again, Avengers again.

Stephen's 20-year escape plan would be so very simple.

And yet...

There were times when he missed Tony so fiercely, that he contemplated visiting other dimensions, other realities, where Tony existed and he didn't. Where there was no Stephen for Tony to fall in love with. Or where they both existed, but were not in love, and would never be. Perhaps they would never even meet.

At the same time, he knew that visiting other dimensions was a risky thing, and there might be no way back for him...especially if he found a particular dimension where he wanted to stay.

There were times when small things he encountered on his journeys reminded him of Tony, and he had to steel himself to prevent his own memories from leaking out and buoying him back to Earth.

There were times when he wished...that when he finally did come home, Tony would remember.

And greet him with open arms. Obnoxiously strong embraces. Warm, fuzzy kisses. The brightest of laughs.

And a ton of stories and shared memories, "remember when"s that would bring a smile to his lips.

And forgiveness.

He often contemplated using the memory spell on himself, but he decided against it for a number of reasons.

One of them was that he deserved to suffer.

There should have been time for a proper goodbye. Then, maybe, being without Tony wouldn't hurt this much.

But it did, and it should.

The only way Tony would end up remembering their time together would be if Stephen's memory spell would fail. And he had worked hard at making sure it would not fail. He had erased every single private moment he and Tony had shared. He had only left the missions, the camaraderie, the mutual respect they had for each other as men of science, as soldiers.

No room for sentiment. No drawbacks.

No tricks.

 ***

 Approximately 20 years later, a Stephen Strange who looked and sounded exactly as he did when he left, braced himself, and opened a portal back to Earth.

And...

He came back to a technological marvel.

Stark Industries had become the world's leading source of scientific innovations - a world that left hardly any room in it for magic. Everything was efficient, streamlined, for a faster and less patient civilization. Shielded from the biggest psychic threat it had ever experienced, and protected by the Avengers and their affiliates from most physical dangers, the Earth experienced a new technological renaissance.

And in the front and center of it all was Tony.

He looked great, for the record. Salt-and-pepper hair and beard, wrinkles where there didn't used to be any, lean and strong-looking even with muscles less defined - but still, brown eyes that shone with intelligence, wonder, and an unquenchable inner light. Still with impeccable (if now old-fashioned) sense of style.

He greeted Stephen with a firm, hearty pat on the shoulders, like a compatriot would.

(This older Tony would never call him “Steve.” Would never push his buttons knowingly. Would never demand to be part of his life outside the battlefield.)

"Back like a star-man, hasn't aged a day," Tony quipped. "Welcome home, star-man."

Stephen only smiled.

He would have been happy to leave their first meeting at that. But back in his old and dutifully preserved Sanctum, he was surprised to find a pre-recorded message from Tony.

In it, Tony insisted on taking Stephen around, as soon as his schedule (Tony's, not Stephen's) permitted. So many things about the world had changed, Tony explained, and who better to keep the bewilderment at bay than one of the chief architects of this bright new future?

Stephen was about to refuse first thing in the morning - one of the mystic arts he'd mastered was, in fact, adapting to radically unfamiliar environments, so "bewilderment" was hardly ever an issue.

But before dawn of the next day, Tony had already parked a very flashy red hovercar in front of the large symbol on his Sanctum, and had woken him - and all the other residents of the Sanctum - up by knocking loudly on the glass and yelling like an attention-starved child.

The rest of the day was basically a joyride through high-tech New York and its environs, with hyper-verbal Tony gladly playing the role of tour guide. It was true, so much had changed - but not Tony.

Exploring a new reality with a deeply familiar Tony turned out to be pleasant.

It was - did he even dare think it? - very much like a date.

Tony all but physically bent over backwards trying to impress him, introducing new and upcoming inventions like a toddler showing off his toys, and how clever he was.

Stephen remembered when Tony used to do that almost every day. He couldn't help it: he still found it charming.

More than once, he caught Tony staring at his face. Whenever he did, Tony would draw attention off it by blurting out an idea or an interesting anecdote from the last 20 years.

And, more than once, Stephen thought he felt Tony standing a little too near, leaning a little too close to him.

He told himself: his own guilt must have been playing tricks on him. Tony didn't remember. He couldn't.

 ***

 The day ended late, with Stephen feeling exhausted. No doubt Tony did as well, because the two men stood on the Stark Tower (v.3.6) deck side by side, without saying a word.

It was like they both knew the hour of parting had come, but neither wanted to admit it.

Presently, Stephen took the reins. "I have to go, Tony."

From where he stood, he could feel Tony stiffen up in alarm.

"To where? How long?"

They were strange questions to ask, and Tony knew it. He dropped his flustered gaze.

"You mean the Sanctum. Of course. Well, it is kind of late, doc. Must be past your bedtime."

Stephen smiled.

"Past yours, too, old man," he couldn't resist shooting back.

Tony stayed silent, not looking at him. Stephen guessed this meant there was no offer of a hovercar ride back to the Sanctum. No matter.

He started to walk away, to a clearer space where he could set up a portal home - but Tony's hand shot out and caught the hem of his cloak.

He stopped. Looked back at Tony. Who still wasn't looking at him. Still wasn't letting go.

"Old man. Yeah, that's me." Tony's voice was so hushed, it was difficult to hear him. "Too old to suit up. Should've ditched all of my suits, or given them away to young blood, but I haven't. Sometimes I take one of them out and go off looking for something. Sometimes I end up finding trouble, but most of the time, I don't find anything at all."

He let go of the cloak, but Stephen didn't go anywhere. He stood, facing Tony, who was starting to seem agitated.

"And I don't know why I'm telling you this, except it feels like I've finally found what I've been looking for. All this time. All this time. And I can finally take off the suit now. Because that's it. I'm done. And..."

His voice broke.

His shoulders started to shake.

He hid his face with one hand, and folded an arm across his chest - folded into himself, in a desperate attempt to hide.

But Stephen didn't let him. Not after all this time.

He drew his arms around Tony. Held him close. As close as he should have held him last time. And all those other times they'd missed.

Tony buried his face in Stephen's shoulder. He let Tony break against him. Wave upon wave of grief and longing and regret crashed down upon them both. It felt to Stephen like standing in front of a storm, and he felt like breaking, too.

A quick, furtive look into Tony's mind said he didn't remember. Not a single detail of their lost year together.

But he didn't have to. The memories weren't stored in his mind.

They were in his aging body, his cells, the very fabric of his being.

As they were in Stephen's.

All this time.

When he had calmed down a bit, Tony stood back, still holding on to Stephen’s arms, and let out a small, bitter chuckle.

"I don't know why I'm asking you this. Think of it as a pathetic old geezer's wish." He looked up at Stephen's face. "But...stay. This time. Please. No tricks."

It was the look in his eyes that finally got to Stephen, reached in and tore him inside out.

He closed the distance between them again and planted a long, lingering kiss in Tony's hair before Tony could see the first tear fall.

"No tricks," he gently promised.

[sleepykalena]

Summary:

Jyn and Cassian have been together for three years, but now that Cassian is on his third deployment, Jyn has to deal with the fact that she has to spend yet another Christmas alone.

For @carr-crashh-heartss, my Rebelcaptain Secret Santa giftee, whose prompt was “All I want for Christmas is you”! I hope this was an angsty enough read with a fluffy ending! <3

[AO3 Link]

Alternatively, you can read more under the cut!

“Are you seriously not going to do anything for Christmas?”

“Curling up on the couch with a glass of wine and Netflix is something, Leia!”

“No, it is not!” Leia insisted. “Jyn, Christmas is in three days; why aren’t you doing anything for it?”

Jyn shot her a look, and Leia’s face softened slightly when she saw the hint of sadness forming at the edges of her eyes.

“Right…sorry,” Leia whispered.

Jyn traced a finger around the rim of her glass and the ice clinked. The bar table they sat in was isolated, but the ambiance around them bustled in the holiday cheer. She loathed it. She wanted to roll her eyes at it. And the only reason why she dragged herself out of her office was because Leia stormed right in and refused to leave until she looked up from her computer and went to lunch with her.

“So how’s Han? And Ben?” Jyn asked, trying to change the subject.

Leia shrugged. “Han’s been busy as usual. Luckily I was allowed to use up some of my leave, so I can watch over Ben while Han finally gets some time to himself.”

“Does he still have temper tantrums?”

“Who, Han or Ben?”

“Han,” Jyn said before sticking her tongue out.

Leia rolled her eyes as Jyn cackled at the accomplishment of her own joke. “You know I meant Ben,” Jyn finally said as she came down from her laughter.

“They’re called Terrible Two’s for a reason,” Leia joked. “Honestly it’s a process to try and understand him.”

There was a contemplative silence between the two after the waitress came back to refill their glasses of water. Jyn continued to trace a finger along the rim of the glass while Leia took a sip out of her own.

“It’s always a bit of a process, isn’t it?” Jyn asked quietly.

Leia nodded. She knew. Jyn was confident that she knew. Being enlisted and married can be taxing in a relationship. Not that she and Cassian were married. But they may as well have been.

Or so she’d like to think.

Jyn sat back and slumped against the tall chair. “I mean, really, me being miserable by all this? I should’ve seen it coming. I don’t know what I was thinking. I even had a rule about it.” Don’t date a man who’s just going to be constantly sent on deployment. It was a rule she broke and, three deployments later, she’s been feeling emotionally drained about Cassian constantly being gone during times when people were just expected to be together.

“You know how it goes,” Cassian attempted to explain. “This is my job, please try to understand.”

She remembered nodding at him. “I understand.”

“I’m hoping I’ll be back within 6 months; at least, that’s what I’ve been told,” he said as he packed his duffle.

Jyn could only nod. She knew just as well as he did that the chain of command was never going to tell him exactly how long his deployment would be; why would they? The fewer the people in the know, the better. That sort of intel was above Cassian’s pay grade. Chances were good that she’d have to go through yet another Christmas without him, and the tone in his voice betrayed the hope he tried to exhibit to ease her.

Cassian stood up and took her face in his hands. “Please say you understand and mean it,” he pleaded, his eyes searching hers for some level of understanding.

Instead of looking him straight in the eye, Jyn had shut herself back into her memories as her eyes were downcast; she remembered the face of her father, and their final exchange before he was practically ripped away from him, her family torn apart and broken.

She opened her mouth, took a breath, and looked up at Cassian’s eyes. “I understand,” she said again, but the words felt hollower in her head as she recited them. The corners of her lips flicked upwards into a smile, an attempt to hide the loneliness she was already pre-emptively feeling.

Cassian smiled back, warm and loving as ever, and pulled her into a hug.

Jyn claimed she understood, but just like with her 8-year old self, saying that she understood was wildly different from actually understanding it. She so badly wanted to, but she just couldn’t, not this time. It chipped away at her with every passing week since.

It took her two weeks to learn that if she buried herself in her work, she could make herself so tired that she’d pass out on the couch and not think too hard about how cold their bed had become since his deployment.

“I’m sure Cassian’s trying his best,” Leia reached out to put a hand on Jyn’s. It twitched under her touch, as if it reviled the contact.

“He is. I know he is.” Jyn sighed. “But that doesn’t change the missed anniversaries, the missed parties, the constant stress of wondering when he’ll come back, assuming he comes back at all, and…”

Jyn couldn’t finish her sentence. No additional words were needed, however. Leia knew; she just came back from deployment herself.

“Are you sure you don’t want to spend Christmas with us? I’ve got my yearly Christmas party, and you can just save your Netflix binge for later that night,” Leia offered.

She nodded. “Kes and Shara already tried to invite me to their place, but honestly you guys are both married and have families to go to for the holidays. I’m used to being alone. It’s probably for the best, anyway- I’d rather not drag a holiday party down just because I miss him.” Because seeing the rest of you together is a reminder of what I can’t have right now.

Leia tried to open her mouth to make a counterargument, but she looked at Jyn from across their table, looking so drained from her crammed holiday work hours, that she thought better of it and shut her mouth. Instead, she closed her fingers around Jyn’s hand and squeezed them gently.

Jyn rolled her eyes, but then looked away shyly with a small chuckle. “That’s too much sentiment, Leia.”

“Alright, well,” Leia lifted her hand off Jyn’s and clasped it with her own in excitement. “Can I interest you in a good bottle of wine for Christmas to go with your Netflix binge-watching instead?”

She turned her head to gaze back at her with a wide grin. “Now we’re talking.”

Cassian sighed as he lay back on his bed and ran his thumb over a picture of him and Jyn at the beach. His skin had tanned a little more easily than Jyn, and he had turned a warm, golden tan as he wrapped his arms around Jyn’s chest from behind. Her pale arms, turning a bit pinkish from the intensity of the sunlight, were outstretched past the picture’s boundaries as she held her phone up for the selfie.

They were wet, sandy, and squinty from the sun. But they looked happy- the wide grin on her face and crinkled eyes paired well with his own soft, gentle smile.

It was one of the few photos they ever managed to take.

It seemed a bit asinine to print a physical picture when everyone had electronic devices. But Cassian learned that it was a lot better to brush a thumb over Jyn’s lips in the picture and not have to worry about swiping to the next photo in his album in the process.

He missed her lips; they made smiles that caused him to melt, they’d part ways as she exhaled in amusement at whatever dumb joke he had to make, and they pouted in such an adorable way whenever he had to go to work on Mondays, when he was back at his duty station.

There was a pang in his heart when he saw those same lips turned slightly downward as she saw him off so many months ago.

He’d been nearing the end of his 8th month of deployment; he wasn’t sure exactly when he’d return at this point. Another missed Christmas at this rate, he lamented.

It started to hurt to look at this beach photo. It was taken on a random date when they went out to the beach, a spur-of-the-moment day that should be cherished, surely, but…

The longer he was away from home, the more the picture became a reminder that this was all he could bring because there weren’t many occasions for them to take pictures in the first place.

“How much longer do you plan on staring at that picture, Cassian?” someone asked, entering the shared quarters he was in.

Cassian looked up. A dark-skinned man with an equally shaved head as his own towered over him, looking down at him quizzically.

“For as long as we’re still out here, Kay; I thought you knew that,” he responded with a chuckle.

Kay took a seat on his own cot across from Cassian. “Have you told her when we’re coming back yet?”

He shook his head slightly. “I’ve tried calling her twice, but she hasn’t picked up.”

“Is she avoiding you?”

“I’m sure she’s just busy at work.”

“To avoid you.”

“Kay,” Cassian reprimanded.

“Tell me how I’m wrong,” Kay challenged. “I’ll even bet she hasn’t responded to your bi-weekly email updates.”

Cassian refused to answer.

Kay hummed in response to the silence.

It was hard to refute that.

On Cassian’s first deployment, the first thing he did was leave an email for Jyn once he had access to WiFi. Her responses were rather quick. The honeymoon phase didn’t last that long, however, and Jyn started to sound more and more dispirited with time. After a few weeks, however, her responses were curt, and came at a much slower rate than before.

Hey Jyn,

We had to deal with some IEDs, but it wasn’t anything we couldn’t handle. Just a minor convenience. I miss you, though. Tell me about your day? It’s been pretty boring here for the past week. How have you been?

Love,

Cassian

Her response?

Hey,

Things are fine. Busy at work, though. Haven’t been getting much sleep. I miss you too.

Jyn

On one hand, this wasn’t a surprise. He found out eventually that Jyn threw herself in her work whenever he left, signing up for back-to-back projects as lead programmer to fill in the time gaps. He was happy to see her do great things for SPAWAR’s software development division, especially as Saw’s right-hand woman, so he beamed with pride when Jyn’s email messages were short and didn’t reveal much about her day. A lack of words meant she was working hard on major projects, as even civilian contractors in the military are bound by stricter non-disclosure agreements.

About a month ago, Cassian missed her more and more, and wrote a longer email:

Jyn,

It’s been getting pretty chilly here. Reminds me of the times we’d cuddle on the couch while watching stupid shit on Amazon or Netflix. Hopefully you haven’t seen anything off our list yet! We still need to see Stranger Things. Please don’t watch it without me? I’ll know you cheated because you always make those cringey faces when you try to act like you don’t know what’s going to happen next. I don’t want a repeat of Kimmy Schmidt, haha

Cassian

Jyn’s response was short, as usual:

No guarantees, Andor. Get home sooner, or get better WiFi so we can binge-watch something again together. Otherwise you’ll have to eat my dust :P

It wasn’t as full of affection as he was hoping for, but perhaps she was busy with work again. Saw seemed like the type of person to push Jyn to her limits, and she wasn’t the type to back down from a challenge. He loved that about her.

But then came the bad news he had to convey to her just over a month ago:

Jyn,

Bad news. I don’t think I can make it in time for Christmas. I know I said this tour was supposed to take about 6 months (obviously, it’s month #7 now), but…you know how it is. They never tell us when we can come back.

I know we made plans to just veg out and maybe have a nice romantic meal together, and I’m really sorry that it’s come to this (again), but I really hope you understand. In fact, I’ll understand if you don’t answer back for a while- I’m sure you’ll need the space. I really am sorry. I don’t know what else I can do about it.

I miss you. I love you.

Cassian

She had yet to respond to that email.

The lack of a response entirely started to worry him. Surely, she would’ve found some time to talk about her free time with Leia and Shara? A complete lack of a response might be exactly as Kay described- an avoidance of him entirely. Have tensions ramped up that much between them because of his absence?

He sat up and buried his face in his hands. “I just want to go home,” he sighed.

“This is what you signed up for, Cassian,” Kay reminded him. “We all want to go home. I imagine you understood this, but surely you knew upon enlistment that you’d spend a chunk of your career being sent to different countries?”

“You know I didn’t really have a choice, Kay.”

“Indeed,” Kay answered. “When money is tight and career options in your hometown are shit, enlistment is a viable ticket out of your situation.”

Cassian’s voice lowered as he said, “The cost of that ticket is proving itself to be a lot higher than I anticipated,” more to himself than to his partner in crime.

There was a contemplative silence from Kay, then, “Your relationship seems a bit ironic though, doesn’t it?”

“I…what? What?” Cassian asked with an incredulous look.

Kay tilted his head inquisitively and said, “Your enlistment was a choice, and yet you knew that Jyn, a civilian, would have to be left behind during your inevitable deployments, even though you kept saying you wouldn’t leave her behind. Going on deployment means getting left behind a lot, no?”

The unusual heat wave today was already suffocating enough, but Kay’s inquisitiveness choked him outright.

“Are you coming home soon?” Jyn asked over the phone a few weeks ago.

“Jyn, you know I don’t know the answer to that.” He ran his palm across his buzz-cut hair as he sighed. If only he had his old hair length back before his enlistment- it was a lot easier to grab onto hair when he was feeling tense.

There was silence- a long silence, actually- made even longer by the satphone’s natural delay. Finally, before Cassian could dare to speak up and ask if she’s still there, there was a resigned sigh on Jyn’s end. “I don’t think you’ll ever be home for Christmas now that your job’s been bringing you out on tours to the Middle East as much as they are.”

“Jyn-“

“But it’s okay, really, I understand,” she said, talking over him though that damned delay. He shut his mouth to let her keep talking before anything broke her focus. “Your job comes first. It’s important to you. The guys in your unit are important to you,” Jyn tried to explain, but there was a pain and loneliness that lingered. “I couldn’t forgive you if you dropped everything like that just for me anyway.”

There was a pregnant silence, and Cassian could sense that she had more to say, but hesitation prevented her from continuing. He remained quiet, hopeful that she was still on the line and just needed time to get her point across.

“I just miss you, is all.” he finally heard her admit, more quietly than she had before, but it was a little hard to hear in the din of tank movement and machine operation happening just several yards away from him. “It’s not the same as hanging out with Leia or Shara. And even they have to be shipped off to other places.”

“People keep asking me what I want for Christmas,” she continued after another pause, “and honestly, all I want is you. I never got to have you for Christmas, or Thanksgiving, or New Year’s. We’ve gone on one Valentine’s date. We’ve only celebrated your birthday together once. And I don’t think we ever got around to doing something for mine.”

“But Jyn, you do know that this isn’t what I want out of us, right? I wish I could have every single one of those occasions with you; you know that, right?”

“I know, I know,” she responded, her voice still quiet, searching for strength, “I’m just…tired. Of a lot of this.”

The statement struck Cassian the wrong way. “What is that supposed to mean?” he asked immediately after she finished speaking in order to get an answer out of her sooner than later.

“Don’t worry about it. This is my problem, I think. This is what I signed up for when we started dating. I should know better. I’ll try harder to get over this, though, and then we can stop talking about it and move on to other things.”

“I don’t think framing it like that is healthy, Jyn.”

“What part of this whole thing is healthy right now?” she snapped, and he could hear her voice quiver at the word “healthy”.

His heart dropped. How could anyone respond to that?

There was a sounding BOOM in the distance, followed by gunfire.

“Jyn, I have to go. I’ll be home soon. I just don’t know exactly when. Hopefully I can call you again soon with better news,” Cassian said hurriedly, searching and reaching around him for his helmet and rifle. “I love you.”

“Please be sa-“

He inadvertently hung up on her as he dropped the satphone trying to grab the rest of his gear when the sounds of gunfire became more frequent. The phone lay on the ground as he ran out to join Kay and the others on the field.

“Jyn had a rough upbringing. She was orphaned, and then bounced around the system a lot. She used to say to me, ’they all leave, eventually’,” Cassian murmured, fiddling with his photo.

They sat in silence, accompanied only by the overlapping sounds of bootsteps outside their room. Kay tried to pat him on the shoulders to ease his tension a bit, but there still felt a heavy weight that Cassian was having a hard time bearing.

“I thought we could have both the job and the relationship,” Cassian said eventually, staring at the ground, his eyes glazed over. “We’re strong people; we’re supposed to be able to handle it. She’s one of the strongest people I know.”

“I believe it was Rook who once said that loneliness can weaken even the strongest of hearts.” Kay’s voice quieted as he continued, “I imagine Jyn surrounds herself with so many servicemembers in her day-to-day because of work that it gets lonely for her if everyone is gone a lot.”

Cassian lay back on his cot and groaned. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Kay fiddling with something in his hands. He tossed his photo aside and turned over in bed. There really wasn’t much he could do but try and get over his moping for a while longer before heading out for lunch.

“Cassian…?”

“What now, Kay?” he sighed.

“Since Christmas is coming up, would you like a Christmas present?”

Cassian turned his head to face Kay, who handed him an envelope.

It was unusual at best and suspicious at worst. Kay never gives Christmas presents. This has got to be a prank, Cassian thought. He propped himself back up to a sitting position and carefully opened the envelope, eyeing Kay with suspicion all the while.

A demure smile played on Kay’s lips, which concerned Cassian even further as he took the papers out. His eyes scrolled through the documents and they widened the further down his eyes scanned. He quickly snapped up to look at Kay. “Kay…” he started.

Kay’s smile morphed into a huge grin. “Merry Christmas, Cassian.”

Cassian felt Kay try to brace himself as he flung across the gap between their cots and pulled his friend into a tight embrace.

Kay merely patted him twice on Cassian’s back and rubbed his upper back briefly with the flat of his palm. It was probably the most amount of affection he could afford to give in one go, but Cassian was thankful nonetheless.

“I’ve learned over the three years of your relationship that her happiness is your happiness. I may be a pain in the ass, but I’d still hate to see my best friend unhappy.”

Cassian pulled back with a bright smile. “’Best friend’? You’re finally going to call me that?”

“Aaaaaaand, that’s enough affection for the rest of the year,” Kay declared as he brushed his shoulders off to scoot Cassian’s hands away.

Cassian was having a hard time trying to find the right words to describe his utmost gratitude towards his rather robotic friend. Instead, he responded with a simple “Thank you so much,” and decided that was more than enough for him.

Suddenly, he had a thought.

Cassian jumped up to his feet and scrambled to open up his laptop.

“Is something wrong, Cassian?” asked Kay.

“Not at all. I need to make a Skype call.”

“To Jyn?”

“No,” he responded with a wide grin. “To Leia.”

Jyn felt a blast of Christmas spirit hit her in the face as she opened the front door to Leia’s house on Christmas day. The air was thick with the smell of a holiday roast, combined with the heat from her fireplace and obnoxious vanilla and gingerbread air fresheners dotted throughout the home. Ben stood at the other side of the front door rug, staring up at Jyn. She couldn’t figure out if Ben was staring in adoration or scrutiny, but she didn’t want to stick around long enough to find out. So she dusted her boots off at the rug, shut the door, and patted Ben’s head a couple of times as she walked past him to head closer to the source of the typical Christmas music playing ahead of her.

“Jyn! Good to see you’ve rolled out of bed to join us!” Leia beamed as she saw Jyn enter the kitchen. She pulled Jyn into a tight bear hug.

“You wouldn’t stop calling me to come over,” Jyn grumbled, her arms pinned down at her sides from the aggressive embrace.

“I had to insist on it- at least come and help us eat all this food before you pass out drunk on your couch!”

“Well, I won’t say no to free food,” Jyn smirked as she handed Leia a bottle of champagne. “Can I leave your presents under the tree?”

Leia was in the middle of admiring the fact that Jyn bought her favorite brand. “Hmm? Yes, of course, thank you!”

Jyn headed over to the tree, where Ben stood yet again, eyeing her.

They engaged in a stare-down as she clutched her five presents- one for each Organa, followed by a present each for Luke and Han’s rather shaggy-haired best friend, Chuy.

“Ben,” she said in a curt greeting.

“Auntie Jyn,” Ben replied, still staring.

She slowly lowered herself to place the presents underneath the tree, not breaking eye contact with Ben. He used to be such a sweet child- the sudden animosity unnerved her.

“I’m leaving these here, but don’t touch them until your mom says you can,” she instructed.

Ben was unresponsive- instead he continued to stare at her as she slowly stood back up.

“Alright, Merry Christmas,” she said hesitantly as she backed away.

At the table, Ben’s mood seemed to have eased significantly as he sat on his dad’s lap, eating mashed potatoes.

“Shame Cassian can’t come home for Christmas,” Han said, taking a sip of his favorite whiskey on the rocks.

Jyn shrugged. “It is what it is. I’d rather not talk about it.”

Han chuckled. “Yeah, just stuff your face and drink with us at the very least- Leia outdid herself and made way too much food.”

She looked up at the spread of food across the elongated table. There was an assortment of hors d'oeuvres on one end, followed by roasted turkey, honey-baked ham, mashed potatoes, and roasted vegetables, which were then padded on the other side by an array of pies, cakes, puddings, and other desserts.

Leia had made all this?

“I mean, I know Luke brought some of the deviled eggs, and you brought the champagne, and Chuy brought the best cake in the table, but…yeah, the second Leia came back from deployment she went to town on her recipe book trying to come up with things to make for Christmas. Eventually she couldn’t narrow it down so she decided to just make ‘em all.”

She gawked. “Honestly, there’s so much food here I feel like I could get into a food coma.”

“Where do you think Luke and Chuy are right now?” Han said with a grin.

Jyn snorted into her glass as she took a sip. She started to feel like less of an intrusion at Leia’s party.

“Hey, Jyn?”

“Yeah?” she responded in between bites of turkey.

“You ever get those problems with internet connections on Skype?”

She thought back to her last Skype call with Cassian. It had been a while…about 6 months now? She felt a little guilty by that realization, but she smiled fondly at the memory. “Yeah, Cassian’s internet was so spotty for a while on-base that he nearly threw his laptop to the wall. It took him 5 tries just to say, ‘I love you’ without the call cutting off.”

Han laughed as he fed Ben a spoonful of ripped up turkey. “Yeah, once I tried to tell Leia that Ben had started to learn his ABCs for the first time, but she demanded proof on Skype, so I put him in front of the camera, but Ben refused to do it at first…When he finally got around to it, the video call kept cutting out.”

“Hah! Did she scream at her laptop?”

“Yeah! but because the video call was spotty, it turned into intermittent screeching that terrified Ben and he wouldn’t stop crying.”

Jyn had to put her fork and knife down to cover her mouth as her shoulders shook with laughter. “You should’ve just sent her a video!”

“I tried! But she demanded to see it live. Like hell that was gonna work with her internet connection.”

“Better than satphone calls, though!”

“Don’t even get me started on those. I swear those delays make up a bulk of our fights while she’s away! It’s a shocker that news anchors don’t blow up when they have a delay in talking to someone broadcasting live from ‘out on the field’.”

They kept swapping stories about the communication mishaps they experienced when their significant others were out on deployment. Jyn knew it was a deliberate attempt on Han’s part to try and cheer her up- as if to say, “you and I are on the same boat!”- and while she knew her circumstances weren’t quite the same, she appreciated the effort. So, she continued to play along with it; at least it gave her something to laugh about.

She and Han kept up their “dependent banter” for a while until Leia showed up with another casserole dish, this time with cheesy scalloped potatoes.

“Before I forget,” Leia started, placing the dish down in front of her on the table, “I do have your present, but it’s too big to fit under the tree, so I left it in my room. You can grab it when you’re done eating.”

“At the end of the hall, right?”

“Yeap! Han, Ben, Kay, and I worked really hard on it, so consider it a mega-present from the four of us.”

Jyn arched an eyebrow. “Kay is in on this present, too?”

Leia flashed a playful smile as she handed Jyn a glass of the champagne she brought.

“I’m afraid to go in your room now,” she said. “Kay doesn’t do Christmas…what the he-“ She paused to look down at Ben, his wide eyes fixated on Jyn, as if he were daring her to get the next word out.

Jyn backtracked. “Double-you-tee-eff are you guys plotting if Kay is in on this, Leia?”

“I promise it’s not a prank, just trust me on this one,” Leia said simply before setting out to hoard Luke’s deviled eggs. “Oh, but if you’re going to get your present, I’ll need to wake up Luke and Chuy- they’ll want to witness this.”

“Okay, now I’m convinced this is a prank. I’m not going to go in your room.”

“Alright,” Leia said with feigned disappointment as she slapped a scoop of the scalloped potatoes onto Jyn’s plate. “Eat that first, have a slice of cake, then go to my room and get your present. I’m not letting you leave without it.”

Jyn sighed as she took a mouthful of creamy, hot potatoes. Leia outdid herself this time, she had to admit- the food was delicious.

But soon enough, her meal was over and Jyn couldn’t eat another bite.

Leia pulled her up and pushed her in the direction of the hallway.

Jyn gulped. The master bedroom door was closed.

Whatever the present was, it was on the other side.

If a clown was somehow hiding on the other side of that door, she resolved to punch the clown, then punch Leia immediately after.

She padded towards the door with extreme caution, carefully listening to any sounds, any ruffles, any…balloon-rubbing or nose-squeaks.

No such sounds were detected when she finally got face-to-face with the door.

She gripped the doorknob gingerly, twisted it slowly, and pushed the door open before flicking on the lights.

There was someone on the other side of that door, indeed, but it was no clown.

“Hey.”

Jyn’s eyes widened.

In front of her stood Cassian, still in uniform, his luggage on the floor. His arms were loosely and playfully wrapped in wrapping paper, and a bright red bow was stuck on the top of his head.

He smiled shyly. “I’m home.”

Jyn stood frozen at the doorway.

She took a breath, then quickly stormed out of the room.

“Wait, Jyn!” Cassian yelled out, waddling at first from the limitations of the wrapping paper. Upon realizing how absurd it was to let himself be held back by the paper, he spread his arms open to free himself and ran after her.

Jyn had slid along the hardwood floor and glared at Leia, who had her phone already poised to film all this.

“WHAT THE FUCK, LEIA?!” Jyn yelled.

Han pressed his hands over Ben’s ears. “Language!”

She pointed at Han accusingly. “NO. YOU SHUT YOUR FACE. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!”

Cassian walked out of the hallway and approached Jyn cautiously. “Should I…not have come back?”

She whipped around to look at Cassian. “You said it would still be a few months. I…” her shoulders sank. “I thought I was going to have to spend another Christmas without you. I spent so much time just trying to forget you for the holidays, just to make it easier on me…”

“You did say that all you wanted for Christmas was me, no?”

He wasn’t wrong, but Jyn found herself at a loss for words. “Yeah but…but how?”

Cassian smiled. “Kay pulled some strings- got me a flight home and a week’s worth of leave.”

She turned to Leia again. “Is this what you meant when you said Kay helped out?”

Leia nodded, the phone still up. “Then Cassian Skyped me to help plan the surprise. Han picked him up from the airport and wrapped him up in paper, and Ben put on the bow.”

Jyn looked at Cassian again, the red bow still adhered to the top of his head. Her vision started to cloud- she just couldn’t believe it.

“I thought I’d never get to spend any holidays with you, ever,” she said, her voice cracking.

Cassian stepped even closer to her, his voice gentle. “I worried about that too. When Kay gave me the plane ticket, I realized I should’ve been trying harder to ease your stress while I’m gone. I don’t want you to keep thinking that I wouldn’t be around when it mattered.”

Jyn didn’t hesitate to run and jump up into his arms.

She was overwhelmed by it all. Her body trembled the more she thought about it, and she clung onto Cassian as if her life depended on it. Her face streamed with tears, and a part of her prayed that Leia wouldn’t use this moment of weakness against her in the future.

Another part of her didn’t care, however, because Cassian- her Cassian- was back home for Christmas for the first time in the three years they’d been dating.

She opened an eye and saw Leia in the corner, her phone aimed at the couple, no doubt still recording this reunion. Their eyes met and she winked.

Merry Christmas, the wink seemed to say.

Jyn nodded subtly at her. Thank you.

Cassian finally managed to pull away just enough so that they could look at each other face-to-face. “I’m sorry I kept making you feel abandoned,” he whispered. “But believe me when I say this: when it comes to deployment, yes, I have to leave…but I will always come back.”

Jyn sniffed and shook her head, “I’m sorry I kept expecting the worst out of you,” she answered back quietly, not wanting to reveal too much to the small group of people still applauding around them.

He kissed her forehead before resting his forehead on hers to nuzzle her nose. It made Jyn warm up a little more, a welcome feeling given her frustration with how cold it’s been. She let herself sink into his embrace a little bit more to bask in the warmth.

She took a deep breath to take in his scent for the first time in several months, and sighed contentedly. “Our bed was cold without you around,” she mumbled into his uniform.

He caressed her jawline and traced his fingers down to her chin to lift her head up. The look in his eyes was loving with a hint of playfulness as his other hand rested at her hips, squeezing gently with desire. Cassian then smirked and licked his lips briefly. “Let’s warm it up tonight, then.”