#And the.... off to art college (ANGUISH)

[inkyu]

This was an OC doodle page but someone in a discord server requested for me to draw Roxas from KH <333 (Trance is the green guy... his name isn't Chyo...)

[silentmacabre]

IMAGINE ☁️

art donaldson x fem reader (y/n) // slow burn // foundation/universe building // gym romance // college!art // quick read (~900 words)

(a/n: I am such a sucker for reciprocated crushes and mutually nervous meet-cutes so I had to write one with stanford!art. pls let me know what you think and drop any imagine prompts you have in the comments!)

🪽

-

walking into the gym was always somewhat of an embarrassing routine. digging your id card out from the bottom of your bag as keys and coins jingle, receipts shuffling to the side. scanning the card, you offer a ginger smile to the girl behind the desk who doesn't bother to look up from her phone.

on the way to the locker room you pass the weight racks. a group of about six tall, fit boys hollering and talking amongst themselves captures your briefest attention. recognizing a few from around campus, however, only furthers your social anxiety. the first few people file past you into the yoga studio, unrolling lush mats that match their water bottles and headphones.

rushing to the locker room now you turn the corner sharply and hit something solid with a thud.

“shit! im sorry i-” he instinctively grasps your upper arms, prepared to hold you steady.

you look up, frozen from the interaction. the blonde haired boy’s expression is soft and you can’t help but notice his eyes. his pupils are wide despite the blinding fluorescents that line the gym, each iris speckled with different spots of turquoise and mahogany.

“it’s okay!” you rush to offer.

his hands relax their grip, his thumbs in delay as they trail over and then off your shoulders.

you attempt another pained smile like the one offered to the receptionist except this time it’s met with a sweet, slanted grin. his jaw hangs slack slightly, lips parted in anticipation of conversation when another boy, slightly bigger and with a mess of brown curls, turns the corner from the men’s locker room.

“art, man…” he says gruffly, slapping the boy in front of you firmly on the back with both hands. he makes no effort to move.

the taller boy enters your field of vision and his steps halt, eyebrows raised then corrected.

“oh- my bad.”

both boys stand in front of you now, obstructing your path to the girl’s room. adjusting your grip on your yoga mat you clear your throat, the weight of their gaze finally too much to bear.

“well excuse me,”

“oh! sure yeah,” the blonde boy shuffles aside, his friend slowly following suit. “…wouldn’t want to, uh- miss that,” he stutters lazily pointing at the mat under your arm. he lets out an anguished, embarrassed sigh as his friend stifles a laugh.

your eyes lock a final time, the bridge of your nose rosy and hot. as you disappear into the stillness of the girls’ room you hear the two boys speaking in hushed voices.

“who was THAT?” a voice you can only attribute to the brown haired boy asks.

“I- I don’t know. I think she’s in my math?” his voice like gravel, words spoken carefully.

“she’s bangin’, dude.”

“c’mon man…”

“what!”

this observation of you in your self described “frumpiest” state makes your ears burn, the back of your neck prickle with sweat and nerves of having been truly seen.

shoving your belongings into a locker, you collect your water and yoga mat. on your way out of the room you pause at a mirror, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear.

‘I guess im not too bad,’ you allow.

-

as class winds down, you lie flat on your back allowing the melodic whine of the music to rock you gently as you catch your breath. consciously loosening every muscle in your body one after the other, you open your eyes to sneak a look at the others in the class, all lost in their own moments of reflection alongside you. a series of laughs moving through the hallway causes a few of them to open their eyes but their interest quickly wanes. instead, your eyes trail out the door just as the boys from earlier make their way past. their biceps glisten with sweat and otherwise floppy hair sticks to their temples.

a particularly ragged mane of gold glues your eyes to him. his dimples are deep, his flushed lips framed by smile lines as he grins, deep in conversation. your chest rises and falls faster now, seeing him, remembering his hands fixing you in place.

before he’s out of view again, he turns to peek into the class room, eyes dancing from student to student and finally landing on you. the undeniability of your eye contact forces his head down, the beginnings of a blush dusting his cheeks just as he is out of sight.

you release a breath you hadn’t realized you held at the sight of him. he made you nervous, that much was apparent, but why?

-

leaving, the gym feels emptier without the chime of boys’ abrasive cackles. stepping out into cool autumn air, you’re about to start back to your apartment when you see it.

leaning against a fence post lost in something on his phone it’s as if he can sense you’re there. looking up, his blue eyes seem darker under the cloudy afternoon sky but the smile that pulls at his lips is profound.

“hi,”

he had waited just to see you again.

“can I walk with you?”

-

🪽

[soaps-mohawk]

i genuinely can’t think of any advantages to using ai in a creative space. personally i feel ai and robots should be used for manual labor, not creativity. why would you leave the humans to do the soulless work while leaving the robots (with no heart or feelings or just genuine emotion might i add) to do the things that need to have soul in them.

i am currently in college for business admin and after that i’m headed off to pastry school and then to open and own my own bakery (hopefully). Ai hasnt quite transferred over to the pastry arts and i hope it never will. i feel very strongly on this topic and actually wrote my public speaking final on ai in creative spaces. i concluded that there is only one advantage to ai and its speed. that’s it, nothing else. ai writing will pump out heartless and good for nothing media that will take all the joy out of consuming and creating art.

i will always support creatives and if there’s a moment i even think about using ai for creativity purposes my best friend (creative writing major) has full permission to slap me so hard across the face it bruises. and i extent that free slap to all writers.

i will be forever in awe and eternally grateful for creatives, and writers especially. <3

-🍁

AI has its uses and its place, but the creative space is not one of those. If you can't be bothered to take the time and make the art yourself with your hands, then art is not for you. Same with writing. If you can't be bothered to come up with your own ideas, then writing is not for you. That's fine. There's nothing wrong with that.

It's like that Instagram comment that's being circulated about how AI art made them value the human soul because they've seen art without it. Like sure, it's cool that you can put a bunch of words into a computer and have it spit out art, but that doesn't mean it's ethical or it should be used. A computer will never be able to take the trauma of the bombings in Japan during World War 2 and turn them into a 50-meter tall amphibious dinosaur that breathes nuclear fire. AI will never be able to emulate the soul-wrenching emotions of paintings like Anguish by August Friedrich Schenck or Nāve by Janis Rozentāls among many others. Art requires soul and passion and emotion, and there will never be a computer that can emulate that.

It's like the post I just reblogged. I want AI to clean my house and cook meals for me so I can pour more time and energy into the things I enjoy doing, like writing and crochet.

Fuck AI and support creative people.

[offbrandkyoya]

74 Better luck next time

previous | masterlist | next

With your boyfriend and friends touring around the world, you are all alone. You kept yourself busy with college work and the art competition. You even went to hang with Lumine like olds times. However, it didn’t feel right. You miss the boys, you miss Scaramouche.

You let out a long sigh and laid your head on the table. You’re at the twins place and eating dinner with Lumine. The blonde raises a brow, “Now what?” “I miss my boyfriend…” You pout and she hits your head with her fist. “You’ll see him soon! Now eat or I’ll feed it to the rats outside!” You rubbed your head before taking a nibble of your food.

“Why don’t you call him?” She suggests but that just makes you even more sad. “I’ve tried like a hundred times but he’s busy. I’ve left him almost a 100 voicemails!” Lumine shakes her head. “Yn, you’re miserable.” You frown, “It’s true love!” Lumine gives you a look of sympathy. “I know this might sound mean but if you can’t handle being away from Scaramouche then maybe you should take some time away from him.” You sit up properly with a confused expression.

“Take some time away? You mean I should break up with him?” Lumina nods slowly and your brows furrowed. “I’m not going to do that! I’ll be okay. WE’RE okay! Everything’s perfect. He’s just…really super…duper….busy…….” Your voice fades and Lumine sighs, “I don’t know, Yn. I’m worried for you. You’re always so sad. Long distance isn’t for everyone you know so don’t force yourself to do this. I’m sure Scaramouche will understand.” You abruptly stand up causing her to flinch.

“Thank you for the food, Lumine but I’m going to head home.” “Yn-“ You grab your coat and dash out the door in tears. ‘She doesn’t get it. She’s never been in love.’ You get in your car and sit there for awhile. The thought of breaking up with Scaramouche makes you shiver. You can’t do that. He needs you, he needs you a lot. You begin to drive back to your apartment. Once arriving, you enter your home, and head straight to your bedroom.

You kick your shoes off and plopped right onto your bed. You lay there, staring at your ceiling. “I love you, Scaramouche.” You say out loud. How can you break up with him when he’s already told you he loves you? So what, you guys are a million ways apart? You’re in love! You wiped your eyes, ‘Does Scara think the same?’

You take out your phone and scroll through your Twitter feed. So many fancams of the guys that it’s kind of making you uncomfortable. There’s one thing you didn’t like and it was seeing Xiao with his broken leg. You’re still pissed he was forced to perform but there is nothing you can do. You liked almost all of Scaramouche’s fancams but not so much that it’s suspicious. Your heart flutters seeing his pretty face and you smile. You couldn’t wait to see them live.

Unfortunately, you don’t have enough to buy a ticket. You’re kind of poor and tours are expensive. You barely made it on their last one and it ended up a shit show. You lay your phone on your chest and sigh. “I’m tired.” Your phone starts to vibrate and you see the caller ID. “Albedo? He must’ve ran out of paint.” You stay in your position and answer, “Hello?” But you were met with panic coming from the man’s voice. “Yn, please come. Right now.” You sit up, “Okay, I’ll be there.”

Hurriedly, you left your home again and decided you’d run to the building where the art competition is at. You didn’t know what happened but hearing Albedos frighten voice made you worry. You see the building and sped up a bit more. You were out of breathe but you didn’t stop running. You slam the door open, “Albedo! What’s wrong-“ You froze. You stand there in disbelief and anguish. Albedo stood next to you in sorrow. “I’m sorry, Yn. I-“ You started to walk slowly to your painting, pushing pass the crowd that huddled over it.

You wished this was a dream but it wasn’t. Your painting that you’ve worked hard on, that you wanted to surprise Scaramouche with was ruined. It was covered with black ink and different colored splotches of cool colors. You noticed water was dripping down as well with pencil scratches on…

You grit your teeth and, in a flash, grab hold of your canvas and smash it into the ground. You begin to stomp on the painting, breaking it entirely. Albedo rushes to you, pulling your arms. “Yn! Please stop!” You shake him off and cried, falling to your knees. “Why?! Why would someone do this?!” You screamed and covered your face. Albedo kneels right next to you and places a hand on your back. “I don’t know. I’m so so sorry.” He wanted to cry too.

“Ln.” You lift your head up and look behind you. It was the instructor, the one behind this competition. “I’m sorry this has happened. Unfortunately, we can’t really catch the culprit since we don’t have any cameras.” “Bullshit! This is all bullshit!” You replied. “I was almost done! This ain’t fair!” The lady raises her hand. “I understand but there’s nothing we can do. I highly doubt you can create a piece in just a few days before the deadline.” Your eyes widen, “W-Wha-“ “I advise you step down from the competition. It’s for the best.” Your whole world shatters.

You shove Albedo out of your hold and run out of the building, hearing everyone’s whispers about you. You ran and ran and ran with tears flowing. You shakily open the apartment door and head in, running to your room. The first thing you do is sit on your bed and take out your phone, dialing your boyfriends number. “Please leave a message after-“ You bit your lip and dial again. “Please leave-“ You scream and harshly press the numbers once more. “Yn?” You gasp, “Scara! Finally! Listen I-“ “Yn, can you call me another time?” Instantly, you shut your mouth. “I’m sorry but I really have to go. Nows not a good time but I’ll call you when I’m free, okay?”

You grip your phone. “Yn? Yn, can you hear-“ You hang up and throw your phone to your bedroom door. You cry even harder and hide under your covers. “This can’t be happening!” You shout in between tears. You never hated yourself even more than now.

- HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!

- I’ve been super busy with school I’m sorry

- anyways we’re saur back

🏷️ @sakiimeo @coquettemaiden @rmiyuki @kur44pika @theblueblub @jxxji0309 @dreamsofminnie @ohmyfinggod @redactedhimbo @kunisbeloved @akagism2 @sketcheeee @thefandomcrow @beriiov @thenightsflower @yukiipc @scaraapologist @scarletttcroww @samyayaya @crucnhice @monaypo1 @feiherp @myaaones @warcelia @hangecanweholdhands @yuminako @valiryyz @screechingxiaolover @tiddieshakeshownu @ilovechuuyaa @d4y-dr3am3r @dazaisfavgf @swivy123 @ganyusbrideee @sagegreenthinks @the-left-glove @wonderland-fan @kylexzz @kaoyamamegami @whycantscarabereal @rvoulte @eunchaeluvr @lxkeeeee @silvermah @baby-bread-in @yelleloww @magica-ren @itzblazekun @im-inlovewithy0u @featuredtofu @anastaxiah @ask-aph-tanzania @drmyday @what-just-happened-huh @xtobefreex @v4lerixxq @duckyyyx @hannoahs-third-eyelash @brain-r0tt

[ryuichirou]

Replies

Short replies today! A couple of follow-ups and miscellaneous ones, and quite a lot of Crewel/Deuce related replies~ A bit unhinged at times.

Anonymous asked:

anon that wanted more info in Edmund here, can confirm nebula college is going on my patiently-waiting-to-be-fed list

Hehehe YESSS Thank you so much, Anon!! I can’t express how happy I am that you are interested in it. And since, once again, Katsu does the majority of the heavy lifting when it comes to anything Nebula-related, I’m right here with you waiting to be fed >:3

Anonymous asked:

I wanna see a spin off called Mobile bs the World, where Mobile has to fight Wallace’s Yandere evil ex Todd to date him.

Omg Anon, please have mercy, Todd isn’t surviving this. This isn’t going to be much of a fight… I feel like Mobile is a much more powerful psychic than Todd, he also has the power of intelligence and Wallace’s love 😔

That being said, I can picture this battle ending unexpectedly and quickly not because of Mobile’s psychic powers, but because Wallace would be confused about why Todd thinks he is an ex – he isn’t, they weren’t dating after all. After hearing that Todd is just going to disintegrate…

I ship them so much. 💪😔

Anonymous asked:

on april fools we are going to get our lovable robot dog in the global version of twisted wonderland. I feel like this means something

“Oh you thought it was a Disney Otome game? Jokes on you: this is a cyborg dog BL VN, and Ortho is the main character, and he is out to get everyone” 😔 Definitely.

Anonymous asked:

I hate how im now wondering if now duece is going to be imagining teacher x student stuff now, with him being the student. Lol

I think we got this one before posting yesterday’s Crewel/Deuce piece, so uhhh congratulations, Anon, you saw right through us lol

The idea definitely never occurred to him before, I feel like Deuce is the type to get surprised by the fact that his teachers in fact do have their private lives and even have sex… such a big and wild idea for his silly pretty head. But he won’t judge!!

Anonymous asked:

by any chance could that new deuce and crewel art have anything to do with deuce seeing him buy a shit ton of condoms? *Don't mind me and my horny fantasies*

Yep~ This is pretty much a follow-up, although I’m not sure how these pieces are tied story-wise. Maybe they aren’t, but both are teasing the same thing – Deuce would look hot when dominated by Crewel.

I think our conclusion is that this bad boy is being punished for being oh so nosy and falling on the floor in front of his professor… he seemed like he really craved his attention, and he got it <3

(fully ignoring the fact that it was Ace who pushed poor Deucey)

furubatsu asked:

Why do I imagine that last Crewel and Deuce pic just being poor Deucy's dream (or nightmare, depending on how panicked he would be waking up) for the next week after that encounter? Poor boy's squirming every homeroom and potions class for ages until Crewl has to sit him down and talk about it.

Yeah, a couple of people mentioned that it looks like Deuce is having a dream/nightmare, and honestly the concept is very hot lol Especially if this is like you described. i.e. the thought/scenario is haunting Deuce and leaves him extremely flustered, confused, unfocused and freaked out.

He could live in this anguish a little bit before this dream becomes reality… just as he convinces himself that stuff of that sort wouldn’t happen to him.

Anonymous asked:

Looks like deuce is getting some extra credit either that or punishment for failing a test or an assignment

Once again, also an option lol Out of all the student characters, I feel like Deuce fits this “punishment for failing a test/getting extra credit” scenario the most, maybe it’s because of how hard he tries to get better and how prone he is to doubting himself. He is also pretty gullible, so an easy target for Crewel, but not so easy that Crewel wouldn’t even get interested in him.

Anonymous asked:

I rise once again from the dead for one reason. Actually, many, your art is absolutely delicious still.

Anyways, thank you for the Crewel content. Have a funny little storytime from earlier this day.

It's has become an inside joke now because we sent it to one of us who dyed his hair dark slate and cut it short recently. It started with the comic where we noticed he lowkey looked like Deuce. So the next day, when we saw the follow-up, we got his ass while he was on a coffee date with his current fling. I facetimed him like it was an emergency and then immediately showed the picture to ask for clarification for where he was last night. Got a chuckle out of his date[he's a vibe], but our friend is mad at us now

- 🐩 anon

Good to hear from you again, 🐩 anon, I’m glad you’re enjoying our stuff~ And your friends too I guess LOL

Oh god, your poor friend. Being outed like that by some rando’s drawing from the internet, I am so sorry 😔 I’m glad his date found it funny though!

Anonymous asked:

do you have any more twst teacher x student ships?👀

Hmm, I don’t think so? Nothing major that I can think of, at least. But we do think of some boys with Crewel here and there: Epel could fulfill a similar role to Deuce because he also has to work extra hard for good grades + a bit gullible; Idia is our favourite boy and could also technically be used for shipping purposes here because of his unique circumstances (i.e. he doesn’t always go to classes, but has to be present during some lab work, so Crewel has extra reasons to pay attention). We’ve talked about Crewel and Vil before but it doesn’t quite give us the sparkles we need, even though we have nothing against it; and we’ve talked about potential Trein ships (or lack thereof) in this post.

I also have a huge beef with Vargas because I can’t figure out why he just doesn’t click with us. Maybe it’s his design? Maybe it’s his attitude? Which is bullshit, because I can imagine someone similar to him working wonderfully, but with Vargas it’s crickets, unfortunately. Which is SUCH A SHAME, because this man CANONICALLY RUINED Idia’s thighs and physically completely exhausted him MULTIPLE TIMES, and this is SUCH OUR THEME TO PLAY WITH, but somehow it just doesn’t work. 😔  

Anonymous asked:

Is is it bad that part of me can see Crewel having one of his dogs (likely a Dalmatian) fucking Deuce as punishment while Deuce is begging for Crewels cock

Anon, yes. Yes, this is very bad, and we agree with you and support you. You’re saying things that people are afraid of saying out-loud. Pups should play with pups...

Anonymous asked:

Soooo…I saw the don’t look at him art of Idia on Bluesky and….Idia…Baby…I’m sorry but you’re way too pretty not to look at. Or stare at. Or…do other things to. Apologies for the unrestrained thirst…

Ohh, that’s an old one! I’m glad you liked it <3

Idia needs to get over himself and accept the fact that he is going to be looked at. Stared at, event <3 Such a pretty pink thing.

Anonymous asked:

I mean…Idia COULD conceivably cosplay as Hatsune Miku without any issues. Plus, he’d look super cute in pigtails. You could occasionally give one a good tug.

Sounds absolutely wonderful, but I feel like if anyone proposed the idea to Idia, he would reply with the biggest “no way” in return. Not only it attracts attention to his hair, everyone’s going to laugh at him for going for a cute anime girl cosplay! This isn’t fun, this is public humiliation! Yada yada lol

I feel like nothing is going to convince him that cosplaying as Hatsune Miku is a good idea… well, maybe Ortho’s puppy eyes could bully him into considering it.

Anonymous asked:

Dare I ask who was doing Idia while he was a maid?

Hmm,  maybe I’m just shit at remembering my own art, but the only maid-related Idia drawing that I can think of is Lilidia one… and Idia wasn’t a maid on this one either, it was Lilia who banged him while looking all pretty uwu

Anonymous asked:

The day I forget to go anonymous is the day I cry. anyways more Adeuce PLEASE those two idiots are my comfort ship aghhhh they are so cute I will crush them with my bare hands

Thank you so much, Anon! We love ADeuce a lot, and I hope we’ll have more stuff with them in the future. We do have some sketches, but who knows when we’ll get to finishing them :(

Also no worries about being anon; if you ever accidentally forget about it, just shoot me another ask or a DM about it, and I’ll post your ask anonymously. I’m not replying to them directly anyways, so it’s all good.

Anonymous asked:

the way you draw violet is so... delicious. *Eats your art and leaves no crumbs*

Thank you so much~ He is our beloved depressed artistic kitten <3 bon appétit.

[imaginationstimulation]

"Either/Or" : Existentialism, Poetry, Elliott Smith and Søren Kierkegaard.

Either/Or is the third studio album by American singer-songwriter Elliott Smith, released on February 25, 1997.

The title of the album derives from the Søren Kierkegaard book of the same name (Either/Or), reflecting Smith’s interest in philosophy, which he studied at Hampshire College in Massachusetts. Smith has long been associated with the Danish philosopher, and was once introduced as him at a concert in 1996.

Smith propelled into the international spotlight after three of the songs from this album were incorporated into the Good Will Hunting soundtrack.

*

from the album's 2nd track, Alameda:

Walk down Alameda Brushing off the nightmares you wish could plague me when I'm awake So now you see your first mistake was thinking that you could relate

The lyrics imply that whoever he is addressing here wishes that he keep suffering, so that he can keep creating art. This sentiment is found in a Kierkegaard quote from Either/Or:

“What is a poet? An unhappy man who hides deep anguish in his heart, but whose lips are so formed that when the sigh and cry pass through them, it sounds like lovely music…. And people flock around the poet and say: ‘Sing again soon’ – that is, ‘May new sufferings torment your soul but your lips be fashioned as before, for the cry would only frighten us, but the music, that is blissful.”

Alameda's lyric goes on to address that problems arise when a person thinks of themselves as the same as everyone else. This emphasis on subjectivity is a common existentialist trope beginning with Kierkegaard’s Truth is Subjectivity.

*

Søren Kierkegaard was a Christian existentialist philosopher living in the 1800s in Denmark. What is existentialism? It’s the idea that individuals are ultimately free to make their own choices, and are therefore responsible for their own life in this strange world.

People who believe in the sovereignty of the individual are one step away from also being a poet. What individualists and poets have in common is their care for and focus on the subjective, personal experience of life.

[Recalling] Kierkegaard’s words on what it means to be a poet:

“What is a poet? An unhappy man who hides deep anguish in his heart, but whose lips are so formed that when the sigh and cry pass through them, it sounds like lovely music…. And people flock around the poet and say: ‘Sing again soon’ — that is, ‘May new sufferings torment your soul but your lips be fashioned as before, for the cry would only frighten us, but the music, that is blissful.”

Existentialism presents reality as the individual versus the universe — you and your free choices against the infinite strangeness of existing. Very often this comes across as a negative experience. The world is so big, and we individuals are so small. This leads us to anguish.

Most people stay stuck there, in anguish. But the poet... has the power to channel that pain into poetry, music. In other words, the poet takes the raw and painful experience of existing, and reshapes it into something beautiful for himself and to share with others.

What is a poet? Someone who bears the cross of their suffering, and then transmutes that suffering into blissful music. What a skill to learn.

[praeteritus-memories-muses]

Name: Yusuke Kitagawa

Series: Persona 5

Continuity: Base Game / Anime

Age: 18

Height: 5'11"

Birthday: January 28th

Birthplace: Japan

Orientation: Bisexual

Species: Human / Emperor Persona user

Occupation: Student / College student for traditional art

Father: Unknown (deceased)

Mother: "Sayuri" Kitagawa (deceased)

Persona(s): Goemon , Kamo Susano-o

Bio:

As soon as "Sayuri", Yusuke's mother who's name even Yusuke doesn't remember, was pregnant - her and her boyfriend were overjoyed to have a child together as a signal of their love. Unfortunately, Yusuke's father died in a car accident about six months into "Sayuri" 's pregnancy. Devastated and heartbroken, she'd still carry hope within her to go on raising their child alone and that child was Yusuke.

Yet even she didn't last for his mother died when he was 3 years old. She was a pupil under the famous painter Madarame and had created a beautiful self portrait of her holding a baby Yusuke in her arms. Madarame was so obsessed with how perfect that painting was that he relentelssly harassed her to own the rights to the painting that she ended up having a seizure from severe psychological stress. Rather than call the police, Madarame let her die and took off with the painting which left Yusuke an orphan.

With no one to take care of him, as both his parents had no siblings and lost their parents years before Yusuke was born, he'd end up in the foster system for a fairly short time before he managed to come across Madarame and fell in love with the painting of Sayuri. At five years old, he already showed immense talent for art that Madarame saw him as a potential tool to make money off of and adopted him while raising him as his own in a dirty old shack on the outskirts of Shibuya.

Though the Sayuri painting was altered. Madarame painting clouds over where his baby self was as to create a Mona lisa effect with Sayuri to leave people guessing what she was smiling so warmly and lovingly about. The painting became a huge sucsess but Madarame would lie that it was stolen so he could sell copies for it on the black market and pretend it was the real thing to people.

Yet Yusuke knew none of this, he didn't even know that Sayuri was altered or that it was even his mother. As he was so very young when his mother died, he doesn't remember her face anymore. The only thing he can so vaguely remember is maybe her voice saying his name with adoration, but the rest is completely blank in his mind from how many years ago it was.

Though Yusuke was in the dark about how evil Madarame was, he wasn't free from his evil either. He was often starved and had his paintings stolen by Madarame who took them and claimed them as his. He would do this with all his pupils actually, stealing their art and claiming them as his before he'd kick them out or mentally torture them to the point of suicide.

One of them had enough and left, begging Yusuke to come with him. Yet where would he go? He had no one and he was only sixteen, he would've surely been homeless on the streets as an orphan if it wasn't for Madarame housing him and 'caring' for him. His own insecurities telling him that no one or no where could possibly house him as well. He was defensive over Madarame, choosing ignorance over the truth of his evil ways.

Perhaps Yusuke might have died of starvation or mental anguish had it not been for the Phantom Thieves coming in to show him the tragic truth behind the one he once called his master. Yet despite the hurt of the truth and questioning his reality, he embraced the rebellion within him and unleashed his persona for the first time - Goemon.

They managed to get Madarame to confess his crimes and take back the real version of the Sayuri painting. There was still a lot of emotions behind the painting that Yusuke isn't ready to face, mostly grief over the loss of his mother all these years later. Seeing her face in the painting makes him think often of how much she likely wished to live to raise him and how disgusting Madarame was for letting her die like that.

It was enough that Yusuke struggled a lot and went through a deep artist's block. He didn't want to paint for the sake of money like Madarame nor did he want his paintings to feel like someone else's, he wanted inviduality in his work and to expose all of the world. Beauty, pain, desire, love, anguish, etc - all of that he wished to convey in his paintings that it took him a long time and the help of many friends to overcome his artist's blog from everything with Madrame but he's awakened his talent again.

At least Yusuke had a place to live without Madarame there! He was already an honor student in the art department of his school and after hearing about Madarame, Yusuke stays in the dorms free of charge so long as he continues his high grades in the art department which he certainly will. After he graduated high school, he managed to get a scholarship to an art college where he also lives in the dorms free of charge but this time out of love for his beautiful paintings reflecting the true light and dark of the world.

Yusuke is very socially awkward, being a quiet boy throughout his schooling days and sheltered when living with Madarame that he isn't really the best at communication. He speaks elegantly and politely, much like a poet. Though people find his way of speaking like a poet to be weird, he views it as a positive way of being eccentric. He also has a love of beauty and fine aesthetics, anything artistically beautiful and aesthetically pleasing only furthers his love for art and desire to paint something truly gorgeous.

[dailynabu]

nabu: day 0

Hi, everyone! It's Nabu. I'm currently 7986 days old and just now I've realize how young I truly am. By age 18 I already thought I was old enough to deal with life and I thought about how everything that would happen, the idea of all of this distress, anguish, pain and lots and lots of stuff made me uneasy. Of course, consider I had spent more than half of my life inside a box, a house that's not a home.

It feels so strange now, uncanny. How was I once 17 and now I'm 21? Don't come at me with all of these math witchcraft. Where all that time go? I don't think I had lived till last year. I don't think one quarter of my breaths were actual. All fake. I'd say: "but not in a bad way", but there's no "good way" to be fake. You're either bad for people or bad for yourself... And I've been too harsh with this person who stares at me in the mirror.

Everything I could, I've tried. I'm trying so hard to love myself but it is actually so incredibly hard. Went to all forms of therapy, tried every med and form. I don't know how to do it. I don't think that people like me does, but I want it, want it so bad it pains me physically.

Do you ever went outside and met a person that looked so confident you envy them? I did. Everyone always seems so much better than I do and I can't conceive the idea of being wanted even if it's about some kind of interest (not necessarily personal interest). I've worked so hard for so long and still is not enough. I catch myself falling into old patterns again and again.

Another question that just popped out my mind is where is that extroverted, cheerful, positive and bubbly person everyone around me seems to know, yet I do not? That person is always smilig and saying nice things, showing love and smiling, asking about how everyone's doing and mastering the art of telling people about how much they're worthy and how they care.

Not to brag, far from it, but people come to me saying they feel safe and not-lonely around me. I sympathize with everyone, like lots of them, love some and even worship a few; still, I feel lonely. Some of them may say: "you can count on me!" and I know they mean it, but I don't feel it, like it's some kind of sin of mine to count or seek them if I'm in need. Lastly, trusting people and opening up seems dangerous, to say the least.

I don't know. Today I don't feel sad nor upset nor distressed, just a bit tired and sleepy. I slept 4 hours in the last 2 days and I've been studying like a dog so I can have this 1 month off college. Exams and homeworks always make me feel insanely anxious and my heart problems keeps attacking me, but this time everything was... Calmer. Certainly not 100%, as you can see I barely ate and slept. I think that, under this hard skin, there's someone, a child I might add, who's extremely anxious.

For the record, I can't stand watching a match of the team I support. My hands feel sweat, my arms hurts and my heart beats faster. I know it's "just a match" and I don't really care, I barely watch something: but when I do, I do feel anxious like it was something really important. I don't really know if it's because my heart condition or anxiety or both, I run from this a-word "like the devil runs away from the cross".

Boyfriend keeps noticing it, how I hate this word (and a lot more) and he lightly jokes, but I truly get offended. I know, it's stupid. Anyway. Today was kinda... I'd exhausting, but it wasn't. I woke up by 9:20am, studied till 2:40pm and then went to college, do a test. 3 hours and half in only 4 questions, I can't stand seeing numbers nor greek letters, honestly. All of this humilliation for a degree, can you imagine? After it, went to Boyfriend's, watched some short films and cuddle till I got back House. Pretty much it. Not a hard day, I'd say, I had worsts and everyday is my best whenever I see his face.

Not too much to add. I don't feel extremely emotional to be venting, actually I'm so tired I could sleep right now. Normal day. I just wanna save this words and every single day of my life so maybe I start valuing it.

(About how much I want self love, how I feel fake with myself. About trust and difficult of opening up with people I know love me. In a good way, I don't feel bad while word-vomiting).

— 20.12.23

[tmkosonwrites]

Nanowrimo 2023

It's that time again when my thoughts turn to Halloween and writing 50K in a month and the anguish of writing about shifters & vampires and being a Jesus-loving girl. I've participated in this November monthly challenge for quite some time and always tend to walk away disappointed at and with @nanowrimo and my regional leaders. I think it's because I expect to be welcomed listened to and genuinely brought into the group, like it is with the Christian ladies and circle I'm a part of. I'm not in my twenties or thirties, sadly, nor do I know what college life and working and having lots of friends is like today. I have a small group of very good close friends and one or two friends with a lot of similarities. My library doesn't do anything for the month and when there are write-ins it's in a neighboring city I don't want to catch a regional bus and be at the mercy of their schedule. So maybe I see about starting one, is the thought/notion that comes to me. So if that part of the event isn't as I like it then why do I participate? I enjoy the Instagram posts and challenges and that accountability even if no one acknowledges them. That in a way feels somewhat like I'm in a community. After reading Elizabeth Gilbert's Big Magic in 2019 I wrote 35K for that year's Nanowrimo meeting my goal for the first time in quite a long time and proving to myself that I can do it even with other things going on. I've had a running plan as to what to do with the characters I've had since my early teens and the mass of vampires I felt that were truly in the world. I'm finding myself rethinking that plan and looking at the entire thing from a different angle that I haven't ever before. I get so overwhelmed with the entire world that I can't see straight. It's all about the "feels right" and my thoughts are like, I should get it down on paper, thoughts. Like yikes! Did Tolkien write out all about the Elves and Dwarfs? So I think I'm going to try to hang on to this different sort of thinking and feeling and use some of what's written already and try to write 50K with the previous post inspiring me. Directing me... but how? How do I write a Pharoah? I sense it's all about taking your fear and running internal thoughts captive and realizing it's not going to be fully ready when I finish writing. It's an art that you need to get the hair off of polish the frame and dress it properly. I follow a couple Christian writers that have no spice in their books and if these ladies can do it, I am no different and can do it with all the hurt and healing I've survived and done. God willing.

Keep me accountable by finding me on Nanowrimo. Thank you.

[ashley-blair-arcanum]

Campus

A friend and I ran a scam in college. A graveyard rested across the street from campus and we would go there and dig up newer bodies and carry them up to the campus library. He took the feet and I had the shoulders. We’d fill the bodies with words from the oldest, thickest books - volumes people wouldn’t notice missing - and capped off the bodies at the head. This was tiresome, gruesome work, but for the only people in the area engaged in the business, we made bank.

Most people used them in education, as surrogate teachers. A few old people kept them as pets. One customer - a Mr Ember - wanted us to become professional, which was neither workablee nor safe. He called me “bobby socks”, or sometimes “black lung”, and my friend “little king” (and my friend did go on to be a CEO).

Mr Ember could not stop grinning and this caused him great anguish. “But I need more,” he said one evening, being personable but insistent. We were working in the library on a fat woman. I said something like, “This is a side hustle.” He tapped his cane on the fat woman stretched across the tale. We laid out a tarp and my hands were bloody and face smokey.

“And this one?” He asked.

“Chaucer,” said my friend, skimming through the volume, whispering preliminaries.

“Excellent. Very well. I would move you to Cuba. I have arrangements there. We could be gone tonight, and you’d work all day and have new lives but the money would be there.”

I’d heard the market survived in Mexico, but now I know Mr Ember didn’t need party favors and was onto a new kind of business. A very bad scene, and Mr Ember did one day meet a terrible end, which anyone around my age remembers well. I turned him down and we never saw him again and soon quit our scam. He would write me, after I became well known, and we traded letters for years. Dummy letters, of course; nothing usable. He engaged in what we now call abomination, though there were no abominators back then. They called his work “danse macabre”. You can credit much of Robynest Tooker’s deathless war to the foundations laid by men like Mr Ember.

But long before that, our little scam was this - these were no venerated ancestors, no lore-masters of golden ages or even jolly good fellows. We didn’t know who they were, besides that it was a Jewish cemetery we took them from. We prettied them up and said they’d died in prayer, high up in the mountains, or had been castaways and washed up on empty shores. All fiction. Gullible people didn’t realize the reason this practice fell out was lack of supply. But fabrication is possible in all arts.

They never discovered us, and everything we did we did clean. No residue or residual, except what we scrubbed from the library floor. I bought my first car with that money and that night drove to the ridge, parked in the darkness and breathed down the air. A covenant wind blew over from the deep woods behind me, from the mountains; you could smell it in the pines. Were hags so far north? I wondered, and shivered. I didn’t want to know and left the ridge.

[pareidoliaonthemove]

Contagion

It was a rare quiet period for International Rescue, and its operatives were all making good on the unexpected free time.

Maintenance had been caught up on. Household chores were completed by human hands, to the exacting standards of Grandma Tracy, and now they had all scattered to pursue personal projects.

John, having elected to remain on Thunderbird Five, was in deep contemplation of the beauty of the cosmos, via the satellites’ state of the art telescope. Alan was chasing down a league record speed-run of a notably tricky game level. Grandma Tracy was pottering in the small, and largely neglected, flower garden. Kayo did yoga. Brains dusted off a pet project left over from his college days. Gordon had taken Thunderbird Four on a marine wildlife survey expedition in Tracy Island’s surrounds. Scott, having finished a backlog of Tracy Industries paperwork, was now idly spending time in an online chatroom with some old, and much neglected, buddies.

Virgil had drifted, unsettled, from one project to another, before being seized by inspiration, and setting up at the piano to score a piece of music he could hear in his head.

Scott had surreptitiously opened comm channels to Grandma and John, so they could listen as Virgil worked. They both loved the music that Virgil wrote, and listening as he composed brought back bittersweet memories of Lucy doing much the same thing.

So they all heard as Gordon came bounding exuberantly up the stairs into the lounge, whooping excitedly about some rare species of starfish that had apparently chosen to set up shop in their vicinity.

“Hey, Virge! You writing some music there? Great! I hope it’s catchy, ‘cause I’ve spent the last three hours with the ‘Pink Panther’ theme stuck in my head! I need something to dislodge it.”

Only Scott saw the expression on Virgil’s face, but Grandma and John heard as the piano tune slammed to an abrupt halt with a crashing of achromatic chords. The anguish in Virgil’s voice as he snarled at Gordon, “Why. Would. You. Say. That. I. Was. In. The. Middle. Of. Something. And. Now. It’s. Gone!”, was enough for them to abandon their projects and start heading to intercept.

Gordon’s self-preservation instincts kicked in, and he high-tailed his way out of the lounge, Virgil in enraged pursuit.

Scott sat for a long moment, trying to massage away an impending headache. Gordon screaming followed by a bellow from Virgil, was enough to have him out of his seat, and setting off after his brothers.

Humming the theme from the ‘Pink Panther’.

Notes:

The standard disclaimers, I do not own Thunderbirds, either the Original Series, the Movies (both Supermarionation and Live Action), or the Thunderbirds Are Go Series. (Although I do own copies on DVD.)

And yes, I have ‘accidentally’ transmitted this particular ear-worm by simply announcing that I had it stuck in my head.

[justforbooks]

The actor Lance Reddick, who has died suddenly aged 60, played figures of authority with such panache that no matter how many times he was handed such roles, he never seemed typecast. He is best known on film for his part as Charon, the all-seeing fixer in the John Wick movie franchise, but his image was forged playing two ambitious high-level cops on television, Cedric Daniels in The Wire (2002-08) and Irvin Irving in Bosch (2014-21).

In each case he was contrasted with a main character: his anguish at the plight of Baltimore as portrayed in The Wire was expressed with internal restraint, opposed to the knee-jerk reactions of Dominic West’s chronic screw-up, McNulty. In Bosch, he was the politician tormented by Titus Welliver’s relentlessly uncompromising Harry Bosch.

Bosch author Michael Connelly said Reddick “took a character who was paper-thin in the books and made Irvin Irving”. He used his tall, angular frame to express authority; moving his body precisely, deliberately stiff and controlled, his face echoing that pose, covering up the machinations inside his head. Audiences watched as he took in, contemplated, and finally reacted, in a voice pitched with the deep tone of authority. His work in Bosch’s second season, where the death of his undercover cop son opens huge cracks in his closely controlled persona and makes him the centre of the show, is a lesson in transcending ensemble play.

Reddick’s highlights in variations of authority-figure themes came in the TV series Fringe (2008-13), running a unit of Homeland Security; Corporate (2018-20), as a CEO; and Intelligence (2014), where he was head of the CIA. On film he was head of the secret service in Angel Has Fallen (2019), and he played Albert Wesker, boss of the Raccoon Police special tactics unit, in the Netflix TV adaptation of the zombie video game Resident Evil (2022).

He was so good that the star of Wick, Keanu Reeves, given a day off from shooting for his birthday, told his girlfriend he wanted to visit the set, just to watch Reddick in action. Reeves then handed him a note thanking him for “what he brought to the character of Charon”.

Bosch also afforded Reddick the chance to play the piano, thoughtfully improvising at home as if to sort out his thoughts; this might be seen to reflect his own hard path to acting success. Reddick was born in Baltimore to Solomon, a lawyer, and Dorothy (nee Gee), a teacher. His musical talent was apparent at Friends School of Baltimore, and he went on to study at the city’s Peabody Institute, a secondary school specialising in the performing arts. He took a degree in composition at the University of Rochester’s Eastman School of Music and moved to Boston, intending, in his words, to become a rock star.

But his style of music, influenced by Miles Davis and Sting, never fitted a rock star template, and having married his college sweetheart, Suzanne Louis, in 1986, and had two children, he found himself working odd jobs, including as a singing waiter on a riverboat. Crucially, on a night shift at a newspaper delivery depot, he injured his back shifting bundles of papers. Forced to lie in bed, he contemplated how he could support his family, and decided to turn to acting, where he noticed there were more auditions available.

He wound up gaining a master of fine arts degree at Yale Drama School in 1994, and two years later landed his first television role, on New York Undercover; he debuted on-screen in 1998’s ill-judged modern-set Great Expectations.

In 2000 he was cast in David Simon’s The Corner, which led to his part on The Wire, while he also attracted attention with a memorable role as an undercover police officer gone bad in the prison drama Oz (2000-01). Recurring parts in CSI:Miami (2005-06) and Lost (2008-09) followed, and he played James Baldwin in the 2004 movie Brother to Brother. He was the voice of the Falcon in the animated Avengers (2012), and of the villain Ras Al Ghul in Beware the Batman (2013), as well as voicing Commander Zavala in the Destiny video game series, and Sylens in Horizon Zero Dawn (2017) and Horizon Forbidden West (2022).

Along the way he finally got to be a rock star, playing a cop in the music video of Jay-Z and Beyoncé’s ’03 Bonnie & Clyde. In 2007 he released an album of his own music, Contemplations and Remembrances.

John Wick 4 has just been released, and he also leaves behind a store of work that has yet to be seen. Reddick will appear in a remake of White Men Can’t Jump; as Charon in a Wick spin-off, Ballerina; in the Shirley Chisholm biopic, Shirley, and as Capt Blakely in The Caine Mutiny Court-Martial. He also voiced the ultimate authority figure, Zeus, in Percy Jackson and the Olympians for Disney+.

Reddick is survived by his second wife, Stephanie (nee Day), whom he married in 2011, and the two children, Yvonne and Christopher, from his first marriage, which ended in divorce.

🔔 Lance Solomon Reddick, actor, born 7 June 1962; died 17 March 2023

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

[mariacallous]

The strategy behind this Republican battle is to fight off the federal state until they have re-established federal power themselves

Florida governor Ron DeSantis has been grabbing national headlines with his relentless attacks on so-called “woke”. In addition to his Stop-Woke (Wrongs to Our Kids and Employees) Act, which prohibits educational institutions and businesses from teaching students and employees anything that would cause anyone to “feel guilt, anguish or any form of psychological distress” due to their race, color, sex or national origin, he has barred University of Florida professors from giving evidence against the state’s voting law, claimed that professors at public colleges have no right to freedom of speech, and organizing a “hostile takeover” of the New College of Florida, one of the best liberal arts colleges in the country. But he is far from the only Republican politicians to attack the education system.

UCLA Law School’s CRT Forward Tracking Project has tracked 567 anti-critical race theory (CRT) efforts introduced at the local, state, and federal levels. According to the World Population Review, there are currently seven states that have banned CRT, while another 16 states are in the process of banning it. That constitutes almost all states with a Republican governor. While CRT is a highly specific academic theory that is almost exclusively taught at some law schools, the anti-CRT laws are incredibly broad and vague and target all levels of education. In my state, Georgia, House bill 1084 bans the use of so-called “divisive concepts” (eg race and gender) from teaching and, although it includes several exceptions and stipulations, these are so broad and vague that many teachers will simply stay away from these “divisive concepts”.

Although all bills explicitly ban the teaching of classic racism, ie that “one race is superior to another race”, they also ban the teaching of institutional or structural racism, ie the idea racial discrimination is not just the consequence of a few racist individuals (“bad apples”) but that it is structural, engrained in the country’s key institutions – from election laws to law enforcement. The idea is simple: if kids are not taught about institutional racism, and the white supremacy it upholds, they won’t question it later when they are voters. As Orwell knew, historical revisionism is always a project for the future.

Both legal professionals and laypersons have noted that “the bills are so vaguely written that it’s unclear what they will affirmatively cover”. This is not because of incompetence or oversight but by design. The vagueness serves, at least, two goals. First, and foremost, it makes the laws hard to interpret, which leads those targeted (from teachers to principals) to be extra cautious. Second, the vagueness provides deniability, both to the courts and to more moderate supporters. In fact, the prime goal is not for the state to censor teachers and schools but for them to self-censor. That is why it was only a minor setback when a Florida judge struck down the “Stop Woke” law, calling it “positively dystopian”. Across the state, teachers and universities had already started to self-censor. For instance, the University of Central Florida (UCF), the state’s largest university, removed all anti-racist statements from departmental websites, while several of its professors decided to cancel scheduled courses on race out of fear of breaching the “Stop-Woke” law.

Although most of the current laws are targeting public institutions in Republican-controlled states, they are part of a national agenda. In his first speech as re-elected House speaker, Kevin McCarthy pledged to fix “woke education indoctrination in our schools”, while former President Donald Trump has made the “issue” a priority for his 2024 campaign. Building upon the misguided ideas of his 1776 Commission, whose work was cut short by Trump’s lost re-election bid, the former president not only wants to stimulate “patriotic education” but also cut federal funding for any school or program that includes “critical race theory, gender ideology, or other inappropriate racial, sexual, or political content on to our children”. And, make no mistake, university administrators will not risk losing millions of federal funding for a “gender” or “race” class, not even at the private Ivy Leagues in solidly blue states.

The recent Dobbs ruling has shown once again that “states’ rights” are not a Republican principle but a defensive, and temporal, strategy to fight off the federal state until they have re-established federal power themselves. We cannot expect individual schools and teachers to fight this battle alone. We also shouldn’t expect the educational establishment to stand up for academic freedom, as was made clear by the recent decision of the College Board, which stripped down its AP curriculum for African American Studies to appease DeSantis.

To counter the highly organized conservative attack, we need a concerted and integrated campaign from all individuals and organizations that support academic freedom and liberal democracy, from the AAUP to the ACLU, and we need it sooner rather than later, as the damage is already being done – one in four of all teachers across the country have already altered their lesson plans due to anti-CRT laws. After all, as Orwell has taught us, how we see the past determines our future!

[pars-ley]

hi! i just came across your page the other day and i’ve read all of your drabbles and stories multiple times lol! so for my ask, i would love it if you did a college AU with popularjock!jk and have it be similar to the movie ‘A Cinderella Story’. some angst with smut and a happy ending if possible! oh and bestfriendjimin! as well :) hope this is not too much to request! ily

At the stroke of Midnight

Pairing: Jungkook x f reader

Summary: One popular boy + One 'uncool' girl + One school dance + One necklace left behind = A cinderella story.

Genre: Angst / Fluff / Smut / Cinderella au / A Cinderella story au / comedy / popular jock jungkook / best friend Jimin

Warnings: Suggestive language / sex 

Rating: 18+ (NSFW)

Word Count: 4k

Beta reader: @casuallyimagining

A/N: I am so sorry this has taken me so long! I had no clue about this film, so writing this entailed some research and me watching the movie...twice haha. I really hope I did it justice for you and you enjoy it. Thank you for the request!

"So, what's prince charming saying now that's so much more important than your best friend?" Jimin pouts, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly.

You flush slightly. "He wants to meet." Grimacing at the words.

"And that's a problem, why?" 

You bury your head in your hands. "Because I'm me and I'm certainly no one special, what if he's disappointed?" You groan, the dilemma churning your gut and making you feel like your breakfast could make a second appearance.

"Hey," Jimin scoots closer to you along the bench and throws an arm around your shoulder. "No best friend of mine gets away with speaking about herself like that. You are lovely, and if he thinks you're anything other than amazing, there's something wrong with him and he needs to be studied in a lab." 

You laugh in spite of yourself, hearing Jimin’s words rattle around in your brain, knowing that you should not be this hard on yourself. You lean into his snug embrace.

You open up Tumblr and stare at the conversation between you and @gameoverguk. Your favourite gaming blog you’ve followed for ages, by chance seeing your gaming fan art and following you back was one thing, but conversing with him and finding out that he also attended your school was a completely different matter. Trying to solve the equation of who this mysterious creator might be is harder than you thought. And the way he converses with you, so open and honest and sweet, that had to narrow it down surely?

Something slams into your back, pain immediately in its wake. You and Jimin turn to see the popular boy of your university, Jungkook, gawking at you and his best friend Taehyung in hysterics. 

Jimin looks down in the grass behind you at the offending apple and calls, “Hey, watch it guys.”

“Really sorry!” Jungkook calls over, a slight dusting of scarlet across his cheeks but looks like he’s also fighting a laugh. It burns you how someone so smug can still be so handsome, and you hate yourself for even thinking about him in any way other than the airhead jock that he is. 

Taehyung jogs over and picks it up, still somewhat amused. “What, didn’t your crystal ball tell you that was gonna happen?” He says to you, loud enough for everyone in a mile radius to hear.

You cringe inwardly, attempting to fight your embarrassment.

“Aren’t you supposed to be one of the top athletes in this university? And you can’t even catch an apple.” Jimin snarks in your defense.

His face drops as he looks like he’s about to take a step towards you both.

“Tae!” Jungkook calls, an air of command in his voice, breaking the tense air as he looks away from you ruefully. Walking off with Taehyung following, eating his apple and laughing between bites.

“Ignore them.” Jimin says sternly. “Speaking of, are you working tonight?”

Your face falls into an unamused expression, as if he even had to ask.

You were working so much you were almost taking residence at your step-mums 'magic shop', as everyone called it.

He smiles at you, his nose wrinkling, and you can’t help your face softening.

“Ok, ok, my bad. Can I swing by later? I need some more incense.”

You shrug, grabbing your bag and chucking it over your shoulder. “Sure. I’d be glad of the company to be honest.”

“Ooooh, maybe we could do a seance?” 

You glare at him and head off to class causing his melodious laugh to ring out around you.

Sitting in the bleachers after class, with your sketchpad and pencil, the perfect view of the city line and the departing sun staring back at you, you sketch away. The pencil etching fast across your paper as you manage to block out the sounds of the team practicing and their bodies crashing against each other.

Long after you've lost yourself in your landscape, fingers grey and shiny from shading, you neglect to hear some of the team members leaving, climbing over the seats and headed in your direction. That is until your pad is snatched from underneath you as you frantically grapple for it, without success.

"You know, this isn't where the nerds hang out." Taehyung smirks at his two other buddies, clearly impressed with himself.

You let out a bored sigh. "Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you owned the bleachers." Your words drip with sarcasm. 

His face drops and a mean glare spreads across his features as he throws your drawing pad in the air. You watch helplessly as the pages flutter in the wind as it flies away and disappears under the stands. 

"Have a nice night." He says quietly, an attempt to be intimidating, as him and his friends leave.

Your veins alight with fury, hands balled into fists at your sides. You wanted to stamp your feet like a petulant child. This isn't fair. Why you?

It's only then you notice Jeon Jungkook standing on the field watching. Embarrassment suddenly extinguishes your angry flames as he breaks your gaze first, walking off under the bleachers. You grab your bag to leave for work before you suffer any more humiliation.

As you reach the last step you yelp with surprise as Jungkook appears suddenly in your view, you manage to steel yourself before tumbling into him.

You stare at him, wishing he'd get on with it and tease you so you can go...but it doesn't come. Instead he hands you your sketchpad, gently dusting off the pages.

You take it, a hesitant, "thanks," ghosts from your lips.

"I'm sorry about him." He says quietly.

You shrug. "Not your fault, I guess."

Seconds tick by as you both stare awkwardly at each other, unsure what else could be said.

"You're pretty. I-I mean, it-it's pretty." He stammers, tapping the unfinished sketch in your book. "You're very talented." 

Your cheeks flush an undignified fuchsia as you duck your head slightly, letting your hair hide you. "Thank you."

He offers you a weak smile before giving you a halfhearted wave and jogging off across the field, leaving you watching his back, perplexed at the exchange you've had.

You stare at your messages, every moment he can see you're online and not replying makes your cheeks flush crimson and makes your mind run frantic.

Meet me at the Happy Holidays dance.

Could you?

It’s the first holiday dance your university has put on--one you had no intention of going to, because you frankly didn't need the added teasing from the popular kids. It is a masquerade ball however, so no one had to know it was you, you could fall pleasantly under the radar.

Were you really considering this? 

What did you have to lose? You can hide behind the comfort of your mask. If he discovers it's you, it's his problem if he doesn't like that, Jimin is absolutely right.

Ok. Where will I find you?

You press send and chuck your phone down, throwing your head in your pillow to scream. Did you actually just do that!? No taking it back now, it's out there. 

When you hear your text tone sound you scramble quickly back to it.

By the old sundial outside. At 10.00?

You grin dorkishly at your phone, typing a quick reply.

Sure. See you then.

You call your number one speed dial, two rings in and Jimin's voice sounds. 

"I was just going to call you, how strange. Listen, do you remember that time I-?"

"I'm in need of some urgent assistance. I just agreed to go to the holiday dance!"

He cackles excitedly on the other end. "I'll be right over!"

As you step out of Jimin's car you have to lift your ice blue dress up to avoid the floor...and tripping. How Jimin pulled this costume together in time, you'll never know, he's taking that secret to the grave. 

You swallow the nervous lump in your throat and adjust your matching lace mask, making sure it's comfortable.

"Ok, go get him tiger." He roars, as he swipes a clawed hand in front of you.

You giggle at his silly antics and take a deep breath before giving him a final nod and heading into the dance.

From the moment you walk in, you want to go home. This is a bad idea. He won't be interested when he finds out it's really you.

You have no time to continue your anguished thoughts as you get swept up in the crowd, fighting your way through to grab a drink. Standing to the side and surveying everyone's costumes, noticing a lot of dark or bright colour choices, you being one of the only people in a pale colour, making you stand out more. Something you were definitely hoping to avoid.

A few songs later and the clock in the hall catches your eye, noticing you had fifteen minutes until you meet your mystery man.

You head outside, footsteps echoing along the cobbled floor, and see that the outside is empty save for a few smoking and talking. 

You get to the large, metal sundial and wait. Stomach churning from the butterflies that swarm wildly inside. 

"Blue hour artist?" You hear your Tumblr tag spoken behind you and freeze. 

You're about to meet him, come face to face with the person who understands you more than anyone, who opens up to you in ways most people wouldn't and who's creativity knows no bounds.

You turn slowly, not knowing who to expect but definitely not who you're faced with.

"Jeon Jungkook!? You're 'game over guk'?" You ask, your mouth popped open in shock.

He smiles sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck, "that's not fair, you're wearing a mask. How will I know who you are?" 

You stare at him, trying to find words to answer his question, but the fact that it's him stood before you blows you away.

How could this be? The person you've been talking to online is the complete opposite to Jungkook and yet, here he is, one and the same.

"You'll h-have to guess." You try to get yourself together.

His mouth stretches into a toothy smile. "Ok, how about we play '21 questions' to help me guess?"

You nod, playing with your fingernails out of nerves.

"Do you want to sit down?" He asks, looking over at one of the benches.

"Um, no, I'd rather walk, if you don't mind?" 

"Oh, sure." He agrees eagerly and you head off down the pathway around the building. 

A few awkward side glances between the two of you and he finally asks, "Do we have any classes together?"

"No." 

"Ok, narrows it down slightly."

You take this opportunity to look at what he's wearing and he's every part the Prince charming. In a white satin shirt, with light blue trousers and a one shoulder half capelet to match, complete with silver, trim detail. Surprisingly similar to your choice of dress, what a strange coincidence.

"You take art I assume?" He asks, into the comfortable silence.

You nod. "That's an obvious one." You refer to your Tumblr page full of your fan art and projects.

He smiles bashfully and your stomach flips at the sight, feeling like a true-life Disney princess with heart eyes and birds singing above your head.

"I don't know many girls in art." He admits,

 "Ok, what about outside uni, do you go to any popular hangouts?"

Your cheeks flush, knowing you're admitting how dorky and uncool you are. "Nope."

"Ok, harder than I thought." He laughs, revealing his perfect teeth again. "Do you have a job?"

Nodding again, you play with the hem of your lace sleeve, channeling your nerves into the action.

As you're about to answer, your heel gets stuck in between the paving stone, causing you to buckle. Panic strikes you. You cannot fall over and embarrass yourself! Not when finding out who you are will be embarrassing enough. Luckily, you steady yourself against a nearby lamppost before falling on your face but at the cost of leaving your shoe stuck in the ground.

You tuck your leg up under your dress, steadying yourself against the street light, directly underneath the assaulting brightness, illuminating you like a spotlight.

Jungkook rushes over to your lonesome blue stiletto and retrieves it before crouching on one knee in front of you.

You stare at him, eyes wide and alarmed by his sudden closeness as he holds out your shoe in the most sincere way.

You bring your foot down and arch it back into its rightful holster. As you do, his fingertips graze your ankle, sending a flush of heat cascading up your body and neck, stopping only at your hairline. 

He lingers there, looking up at you with huge doe eyes, but with a severe intensity you've never noticed from him before. 

His fingers skate up your leg slightly as he rises, sending a delicious shiver through you. His fingers tips hint at your hand, you yearn to reach out and hold it, as he stands mere centimeters away from you. His intoxicating scent swirling around you like your own personal hurricane, taking your composed state and tearing through it, leaving it whimpering weakly on the ground. His face is too close to yours and yet not close enough. You feel feverish from his proximity and yet you need him closer to sate your heat.

Your breast vibrates from the aggressive pounding of your heart. Having him here on his knees in front of you, something not even acceptable in your wildest dreams and yet, here he is. 

The person you've gotten to know so well, such a contrast to the person you've seen around campus. But then again, he seems to like the person he's gotten to know too, maybe he won't be as disappointed when he realises who you are? Maybe you can kid yourself into thinking that.

A chiming sounds in the distance, barely there and yet it creeps further into your subconscious.

"Your phone is ringing." He whispers, his breath tickling your face, as his eyes still blaze into yours.

'My phone. My phone? Oh, my phone!' Your muddled thoughts clear themselves enough for you to understand his words. You pull it out of your little silver handbag and see Jimin's number on screen.

"Hello?" You ask, staring dreamily at Jungkook who is rooted firmly in his spot.

"Ok, I apologise if you're throat-deep around prince charming’s dick but I really need to make it home before midnight so my dad doesn't turn me into a pumpkin...and by that I mean, pounded, pulped and pressed into pumpkin pie." 

You snap out of it suddenly, realising Jimin's words and not wanting him to get in trouble because of you. "Of course. I'm coming, right now."

Jungkook's eyes flit back to reality with a deep frown. His hand clasps yours as you hang up and tuck your phone back into your bag. Your legs, already moving towards the front entrance where he would be waiting.

"Wait," Jungkook's pleading pierces right into your chest, feeling your resolve bubble up to the surface, enticing you to stay and see where the night takes you. But you don't.

"I can't, I have to go." You say, gently slipping your hand from his and jogging elegantly to the front parking lot.

When you see Jimin's dads silver Rolls Royce, you're suddenly eager to get in and share your news.

"So...did you meet him!?" An excited Jimin shakes your arm as you close the door behind you.

"Yes. You will never guess who he is." You fasten your belt and Jimin pulls off quickly, both of you wincing as he narrowly misses a barrier post on the way out of the campus.

"Who?" 

You smile to yourself, heart fit to burst. "Jeon Jungkook."

Jimin's foot taps on the brakes, lurching you forward.

"I'm sorry. What?" He turns to you, eyes wider than you've ever seen them. "As in, popular boy, sex god Jungkook?"

You scoff. "Who told you he was a sex god?"

"I'm making assumptions. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough." He grins as he elbows you in the ribs and sets off driving you home, while excitement rapidly blooms inside you.

You dropped your necklace.

You read the words over and over, unsure what your response should be. You needed that necklace. The simple silver chain holding the tiny teardrop pearl. It was all you had left of your dad. When he died, your step-mother sold most of his things, including gifts he bought for you. This was your last, most cherished item. The only reason you were allowed to keep it is that you were wearing it at the time and you haven't taken it off since. Losing it had your chest aching. You stared at Jungkook's last message until sleep over took you.

Monday morning. Eyes gritty and burning, you wake to the sea of sleep trying to entice you back to its darkening depths but you fight your fluttering eyelids and get ready for a new day.

How are you going to look at Jungkook now? You should tell him who you are. Yes, you'll do that and get your necklace back and it'll be happily ever after. 

Only it won't.

From your experience happily ever after doesn't happen for most people, even accomplished, brilliant, beautiful people. You're entirely average and ordinary, why would it happen for you?

By the time you get to campus, your manic mind has been changed numerous times. You decide to wait until you see him, which you spend every moment of your arrival scanning the faces that pass you.

"Hey, hey, Jelly Bean. Looking for me?" Jimin's cheerful face comes into full view, distracting you.

He's clearly unimpressed with whatever expression you're portraying currently, as he pouts and turns to the sea of faces. "Clearly, I no longer matter, now you've got big dick Jungkook."

You hush him loudly, looking around to ensure there were no listening ears. "Firstly, I'm begging you, stop talking about his dick and secondly, stop being stupid."

He laughs at your stressed rant. "Ok, ok, jeez. Is he meeting you this morning?"

Your body tenses, knowing, already hearing the lecture he's about to scold you with.

"You didn't tell him, did you? He still has no idea it's you!?" He sighs, throwing his hands in the air dramatically, typical Jimin fashion. "I swear to god...If you don't tell him, I will."

Your head snaps over to him as you walk side by side into the building, glaring menacingly in his direction. "You wouldn't dare."

He shrugs. "Try me, scaredy cat."

You huff and scrub at your tired eyes. "Let me just get through my classes then we shall discuss this."

He laughs as he tussles your hair and heads off in the opposite direction.

Your day passes fairly quickly, even though your struggle to stay awake during lectures only grows.

You do not see Jungkook, which is not unusual as you're not even in the same wings of the building most of the time.

Jimin's frantic waving has you puzzled as a deep frown creases your brow as you walk towards him, his jumping and pointing most unusual. It's only when you see a set of hands directly in front of you and feel your necklace land on your chest as it's draped across your collar bones, that you stop in your tracks. 

Those hands, warm at the back of your neck and a mouth next to your ear saying, "I told you I'd look after it and return it." Unmistakably Jungkook's voice whispers in your ear making you quiver.

When his hands are gone you look down and find relief washing over you with the familiar feel of your necklace, having felt bare and empty without it.

"Why didn't you reply to my messages?" He asks, stepping in front of you with a big bunny smile.

Wide eyed with shock, your mouth gapes open with the slow realization that he is, in fact, talking to you. "How-how did you…" Words fail you as you frantically think of any way you might have let slip your identity but coming up empty.

"How did I know it was you?" He asks, mouth pulled on one side in a smile. "When you dropped your necklace as you left the dance, I recognized it instantly. "

"Wh-what?" You squeak out. You attempt to swallow your confusion enough to form a coherent sentence. "On what planet would someone like you notice anything about someone like me."

A look of hurt flashes across his face, almost as if you'd slapped him as he takes a step towards you, a hair's width away now. "How could I not notice you? You're beautiful and smart, you don't follow the crowd and you're kind to everyone, I've noticed everything the last two years. I've just never spoken to you properly because….well...what do I have to offer someone like you, with endless talents and interests, a charming personality to boot and just when I think that's all there is, I discover something else about you. I'm just the school jock, popularity gets me opportunities, I don't have to work hard for anything...I feel...inferior to you. Worthless."

Your heart aches, hearing the words you feel escaping his mouth. How could that be possible? How on earth could he be so utterly mistaken, so completely wrong about himself?

"But gameoverguk is nothing like that person you're describing. If that's truly who you are?" You question quietly.

He nods, placing a finger under your chin and tilting your head up to him.

"Hi, I'm Jeon Jungkook, I'm a gamer geek, I'm good at sports, I enjoy bike rides on the weekend and finding new food spots and I'd really like to take you out sometime...if you'll let me."

You feel your lips stretch into an undeniable grin. "Nice to finally meet you Jungkook. I'd love to."

As you aim the plastic machine gun, keeping it steady in your armpit and pointed towards the screen, you and Jungkook race through the game, taking down your enemies at every chance. When your team name, "Blue Hour Gamer" flashes in neon letters on screen as the winners, your hollering and hooting fill the arcade. 

You don't even care that people are watching, not when you jump up and high five each other or when that high five turns into a hug, or when that hug very quickly turns into a kiss. You don't care.

You pull away quickly, embarrassment finding its way to dust your cheeks scarlet. Until you feel his hand press your lower back to him, your bodies crushing together and moving in perfect sync, making their own rhythm and inviting you to sing with it.

Heat blazes inside you like a wildfire, capturing everything else in its path and turning into thoughtless ash in the wind. Nothing else mattered, just him, his lips against yours, his hands on your skin, caressing so gently and yet setting your skin aflame.

Before you knew it, you were at his small, studio apartment, realising you had no clue he lived alone but thankful for that just the same.

When your back finds the bed, you sink into it, disappearing into a cloud of euphoria as he roams your body, slow and meaningful. Every touch makes you feel things you never have before, and every movement brings you closer to the edge of the precipice. 

The way his mouth feels on you as he explores your body sends sparks of electricity racing through you. The way he feels inside you with each perfect, controlled movement lights you up like the sunrise after dark, warming you with its rays as you stare off the cliff edge and brace yourself for the impact. His hand caresses your cheek as he looks deeply into your eyes, something so sweet and pure in the action that your chest swells with emotion. His forehead touches yours as he moves in perfect time with your pounding heart. Suddenly you're falling, everything going past in a rush before crashing onto a sea of ecstasy, writhing and moaning until your climax subsides and his has joined in unison.

A tender kiss on your head, his arm winding around you, pulling you to him and encasing you in the perfect safety net is enough. Maybe he'll be your happily ever after, after all.

[astrognossienne]

couple analysis: john lennon + yoko ono - a unique codependency

“At least I had that, one good guy understood me.” - Yoko Ono

“She don't suffer fools gladly, even if she's married to him.”  - John Lennon

The two connected on multiple levels — spiritual, physical, artistic, political — and fell madly in love. The real-life ballad of John and Yoko didn’t really begin until after the Beatles had been left in the rearview mirror. Yoko Ono and John Lennon dreamed of a perfectly equal relationship, one that they symbolized by both wearing white to their 1969 wedding. They were definitely the strangest power couple of the ‘70s. John was suddenly making art and movies, while Yoko was making music. But this experimental sound was often too much for people to handle, with many fans writing their art off as too experimental for their liking. Their eerie, all-in kind of love made a lot of people uncomfortable. It got to the point where Beatles fans were concerned for his well-being and whole-heartedly believed that she broke up the band. While their consuming relationship received a lot of criticism, the famous love birds didn’t exactly shy away from the spotlight. For those who are still trying to make sense of the Beatles’ final split in 1970, Ono was an easy scapegoat. First off, Ono was older than her husband. Second, she wasn’t white. Also, like her husband, she held impassioned political beliefs and was rather weird. Whereas Lennon’s irreverent wit and zaniness, and his outspoken views on politics and religion, were often found endearing by fans, Ono’s did not find such a hospitable interpretation. With a half-century of perspective — and a safer distance from the breakup of the Beatles — it’s easier to appreciate the love story of John and Yoko, not to mention Yoko’s own incredible journey.

Love life of John Lennon: John Lennon dragged his heels into adulthood while clinging to women all too eager to indulge the petulant child. It started with his mother Julia (background of their relationship is covered at length in the analysis of John Lennon). In July 1958, Julia was hit by a car as she crossed the road outside Mimi’s house and was killed. She was just 44.

“I lost my mother twice,” John said later. “Once, as a five-year-old when I was moved in with my auntie. And again, when she actually, physically died...and that was really a hard time for me. It just absolutely made me very, very bitter, my mother being killed, just when I was re-establishing a relationship with her.”

He raged against the loss. Each morning he drew his curtains to see the exact spot where his mother was killed. Isolated in his anguish, he was in desperate need of someone to cling to. He found her at Liverpool College of Art. Art student Cynthia Powell was a year older, pretty, demure, and sweetly spoken. She wasn’t his type. Nor could he be described as hers. But there was chemistry. Always disorganized, John would help himself to her pencils and pens. He couldn’t resist making fun of her accent, her outfits, her “properness”. Powell once overheard Lennon give a compliment to a girl with blonde hair in the college, who looked similar to the French actress Brigitte Bardot. The next Saturday, Powell turned up at the college with her hair several shades blonder. Lennon noticed immediately. After a college party to celebrate the end of term, Lennon asked Powell if she would like to "go out" with him. She quickly replied that she was engaged to a young man in Hoylake; he yelled at her, "I didn't ask you to fucking marry me, did I?" He later approached her and asked if she would go to the Ye Cracke pub. She was confused when he ignored her all evening, but eventually invited her into the group with a joke. Their courtship began.

They began dating, with Lennon now referring to her as "Cyn". In the autumn of 1958, she ended her engagement to be with him, and he ended his relationship with another art student, Thelma Pickles. His jealousy could also manifest itself in violent behaviour towards her, as when he slapped her across the face (causing her head to hit a wall), after watching her dance with his best friend Stuart Sutcliffe. After the incident, she broke up with Lennon for three months, but resumed their relationship after his profuse apology. In August 1962, she found herself pregnant with his child; later that month, they got married (under secrecy at Beatles manager Brian Epstein’s insistence), and after a long, terrifying labour that she was forced to endure in hospital without John as the Beatles were on tour, Cynthia gave birth to his first son, John Charles Julian, on April 8, 1963. John did not meet his son for three days. Three weeks later, he left the worn-out nursing mother and tiny baby at home to go on vaction with Epstein. In 1964, at the height of Beatlemania, he met Alma Cogan (a fading singer 8 years his senior that he used to savagely mock), and they, surprisingly, not only became close friends, they soon began an affair. Alma and Lennon, both heavily disguised, took to meeting for passionate interludes in anonymous West End hotel suites, where they sometimes registered as 'Mr and Mrs Winston' (Lennon's middle name). When Cogan died from ovarian cancer aged 34 in 1966, the 25-year-old Lennon disintegrated. Crazed with grief, he confessed to Cynthia, she said, that Alma was a reincarnation of his late mother. Throughout the marriage, Lennon slept with other women and would leave drugs "lying around the house." Two weeks after Cogan died, Lennon met Yoko Ono, the woman who was to control and dominate the rest of his life. Things came to a head when he drunkenly told Cynthia about his affair with Ono. John then invited Yoko to the matrimonial home, where they had sex in Cynthia’s bed. Instead of doing the decent thing and sitting down with his wife to explain that the marriage was over, he contrived for Cynthia to walk in on them. John filed for divorce and played dirty: Cynthia was accused of adultery and threatened with losing Julian. She was paid off with a pittance.

Love life of Yoko Ono: After surviving the bombing of Tokyo and the great fire raid of 1945, Yoko's family endured some desperate times when the former upper-crust clan feared for their lives and had to beg for food. The family left Tokyo and moved to Scarsdale, New York, where Yoko enrolled as a student at Sarah Lawrence College in Manhattan in 1953. In 1956, Yoko Ono met Toshi Ichiyanagi, a Japanese avant-garde composer and pianist who was one of the leading composers in Japan during the postwar era. They were both young Japanese artists living in New York. Ichiyanagi did not, like Ono, have wealthy parents and thus was not acceptable to Ono’s family, so the couple eloped. They lived like young avant-garde artists, but both retained their affection for classical Japanese culture as well. Ichiyanagi's decision to return to Japan, while Ono remained in New York, rendered the marriage untenable, and they divorced in 1962. Yoko had a nervous breakdown and attempted suicide, and her family committed her to a mental institution. While in the hospital, Yoko would meet another man who would change her life in more ways than one, jazz musician Anthony Cox. Tony had become interested in some of Yoko's avant-garde art pieces. He was so enamored by her work that he tracked her down at the hospital where she was being held and helped get her released. The couple married in 1962, and their daughter Kyoko was born in 1963. Cox claimed he tended to their daughter while Yoko immersed herself in her work. "That was part of something that Yoko felt very strongly about," says Cox, "that if she had kids, the husband should help take care of them. I agreed to it before the marriage," Tony said to People. The couple moved to London in the late 1960s, and shortly after that, Yoko met John Lennon. Within three years, she and Tony divorced. 

Their love life together: John Lennon met Yoko Ono in November 1966 at London’s Indica gallery where she was exhibiting her work. He took a bite out of the apple she’d staged like a Duchamp readymade — at last, she’d found her Eve. Their attraction was instant and their love affair began shortly after that first meeting. Famously, Yoko Ono had no idea who John Lennon was and wasn’t impressed by his fame in the least, even though by this point The Beatles were international superstars. Lennon sponsored one of her art shows and started dropping coded sexual references about Ono into his music. One day, Lennon invited her over while his first wife Cynthia was away on vacation with their son, Julian. John revealed in an interview with Rolling Stone: “It was midnight when we started Two Virgins, it was dawn when we finished, and then we made love at dawn. It was very beautiful.” The heart wants what it wants, and eventually Lennon’s wife Cynthia caught the two of them in bed together. The pair divorced and Ono became pregnant shortly after but lost their first son in a miscarriage. The pair wed in Gibraltar on March 20, 1969 and less than a year later, the Beatles broke up. After connecting with Lennon, it was easy for other artists to dismiss her as a sellout or a gold digger, but really Lennon completed her vision, gave her the populist audience she’d long desired. Ono claims Lennon was obsessed with spending every minute with her, even following her to the bathroom so they wouldn’t be apart for a minute. This new obsession left less time to work with the band and when the other Beatles confronted him about it, Lennon became furious and defensive.

Though her ex-husband Cox had been given custody of his and Ono’s daughter Kyoko, a bitter battle had broken out over Yoko’s visitation rights. The Lennons won custody of Kyoko in the U.S. Virgin Islands, but when they went to take custody of the child, they discovered that Cox had moved to Texas, where he had set up residency and was countersuing them. The battle for Kyoko started all over again, but when Cox saw that Ono and Lennon were on the verge of  winning the case after they agreed to the judge's stipulation that they raise Kyoko in America, he fled with his daughter. Cox felt that the Lennons’ power and money would eventually cost him his daughter. Cox always maintained that his daughter wanted to stay out of the limelight and away from the furor surrounding her mother. Meanwhile, there was trouble in paradise in the Lennons’ marriage and this lead to John’s “lost weekend”. The whole thing came about because Ono and Lennon were fighting all the time. Previously, John had indulged his feverish sex drive whenever he liked. Now he had only Yoko to satisfy his needs – and by her own assessment she was not sexually adventurous. John soon became bored.

In 1973, Lennon reportedly cheated on Ono. The couple attended a party where John was worse for wear. He spied a woman sitting on her own and led her into an adjoining room. Soon, the entire party became uneasily aware of what John and the woman were doing. Yoko, paralyzed, clay-faced with passive indignity, just stood there. Although she protested indifference, the humiliating experience proved a turning point, sowing seeds of doubt that would provoke her next move. Despite (or because of) this, he became overly possessive of her, and his possessive ways were starting to grate on his wife. That’s why Yoko orchestrated the affair with her assistant May Pang for Lennon – to get him away from her and keep him happy. May put up with his endless phone conversations with Yoko, whom he needed more than ever, and with his interminable pleadings with her to be allowed home. May encouraged Lennon to restore his relationship with Julian, whom he had not seen for three years, and who was by now 11. May cooed over Julian, befriended Cynthia, and convinced herself that John was The One. She said John returned to her again and again, long after he and Yoko were reunited. To many who witnessed it, she was no more than a personal assistant with benefits. But then Lennon and Ono reconnected so quickly and dramatically that Pang thought maybe Lennon was brainwashed. One year later, Ono gave birth to the couple’s son, Sean.

Following their reconciliation, John Lennon and Yoko Ono enjoyed seven more happy years of marriage. On December 8, 1980, the Lennons spent several hours at the Record Plant before returning to the Dakota at approximately 10:50 p.m.; Mark David Chapman, a deranged fan, accosted them and shot Lennon five times, killing him instantly. From his late teens John Lennon had been driven to destroy virtually everything that came good for him, from romantic relationships to professional success. What the world regards as a pointless tragedy John, for all we know, may have considered to be a fitting end. As far as Yoko goes, she went from absolutely being John's soulmate and true love to her seeming quite happy soon after his murder and shacking up with younger boyfriend and interior designer Sam Havadtoy at The Dakota. Nonetheless, Ono is responsible for constructing Strawberry Fields in Central Park, New York as a way to honour her late husband and also founded the John Lennon Museum. In 1986, Ono wrote an open letter to her daughter, in which she stated that she loved her and thought of her every day. In 1997, the 31-year-old Kyoko, married, herself a mother, made contact with Ono. The two reunited. Kyoko met her brother Sean and introduced her mother to her two children and her husband.

Next, I’ll go back to my beloved classic Hollywood stars, back to the silent age when the bathtub gin this actress loved was the rage. She was known as the original madcap screen queen decades before comediennes like Lucille Ball became household names: Scorpio Mabel Normand.  

John Lennon

Stats

birthdate: October 9, 1940

major planets:

Sun: Libra

Moon: Aquarius

Rising: Aries

Mercury: Scorpio

Venus: Virgo

Mars: Libra

Midheaven: Capricorn

Jupiter: Taurus

Saturn: Taurus

Uranus: Taurus

Neptune: Virgo

Pluto: Leo

minor asteroids and points:

North Node: Libra

Lilith: Pisces

Vertex: Libra

Fortune: Capricorn

East Point: Aries

elemental dominance:

air

earth

modality dominance:

cardinal

house dominants:

6th

1st

11th

planet dominants:

Mars

Saturn

Sun

sign dominants:

Libra

Taurus

Aries

Yoko Ono

Stats

birthdate: February 18, 1933

major planets:

Sun: Aquarius

Moon: Sagittarius

Rising: Libra

Mercury: Pisces

Venus: Aquarius

Mars: Virgo

Midheaven: Cancer

Jupiter: Virgo

Saturn: Aquarius

Uranus: Aries

Neptune: Virgo

Pluto: Cancer

minor asteroids and points:

North Node: Pisces

Lilith: Gemini

Vertex: Aries

Fortune: Sagittarius

East Point: Libra

elemental dominance:

air

fire

modality dominance:

mutable

house dominants:

5th

12th

3rd

planet dominants:

Venus

Moon

Uranus

sign dominants:

Aquarius

Virgo

Libra

Read more about their astrological synastry under the cut:

Relationship Overview:

Sun-sun synastry: Libra is attracted to strong, almost domineering, confident women, and Aquarius is no shrinking violet. As such, John reveals himself most plausibly and reliably through the formidable females in his life, regardless of whether they cherished or neglected, repaired or damaged, fortified or weakened him. A true Libra man, for all the fierce, influential, indomitable men in John’s life, it was the women who dominated it. Libra men also seem to have a thing for older women; in John’s case, this is possibly linked to the death of his mother when he was just 17. Yoko was the alpha female John needed, the partner he felt he deserved. She could hold her own in sophisticated company where John tended to feel inhibited. He would look to Yoko for guidance and approval in most things, as a child looks to his mother. Tellingly, he called Yoko “mother”. Often this pairing comes from divergent ethnic or cultural backgrounds and Libra inhabits a world into which Aquarius might not otherwise enter. Detractors might say this is no coincidence. So, it was with John and Yoko. This relationship was defined by inventiveness and upheaval. Quite a few think they’re strange. Abstract thinkers, they shared a mental affinity – each impacted the other’s state of mind. Aquarius can be like a drug for Libra. To John, as a Libra, who can feel like something of an anomaly himself, Yoko seemed not to judge him the way he imagines other women do, rating him against other males. There was an immediate mental affinity here, as well as mutual creative inspiration. No other female had the power to so quickly and immediately pussywhip the Libra, to the consternation of his friends and family. Indeed, he fell hard and fast here and was clingier than everyone likes to say Cancers are, as he literally could not leave her side. They can become like one mind and body, if not too insular and a bit smug. She brought out protective instincts he scarcely knew he possessed, opening a wellspring of feeling, making this most conceptual of men feel mighty real. Libra rules Aquarius’ 9th house of the higher mind, education, belief systems, and more literal means for expanding one’s vistas. Yoko was aware that this relationship provided her with the ability to grow, intellectually and creatively. For sure, this was not a traditional bond for Yoko, who here wasn’t expected to fulfill a staid societal or gender role. It was an aspirational match for her, though not in terms of wealth or status (as her many detractors liked to asset), rather more philosophically, in her pursuit of true meaning in life. Aquarius, in turn, governs Libra’s cosmic 5th house of pleasures including love affairs, creative work, children, socializing, and all such amusements. He loved her because there was little baggage that she brought into the bond, and having children with such a lady also appealed to him. For Libra, the scales, the only inanimate symbol in the zodiac, love tends to be something conceptual. But here John felt it acutely and needed to bestow it wholeheartedly.

Moon-moon synastry: In their relationship, their temperaments were mostly on the same plane. Her lunar Sagittarian outsized and vitriolic emotions bordered on insensitivity which complemented Lennon's God complex as well as his general self-satisfied douchiness courtesy of his Aquarian moon. His philanthropy was no more than a cynical smokescreen for how little he really cared for mankind – imagining no possessions while owning cattle herds, fur-coat fridges and multi-million-dollar homes. John sought the same degree of freedom in personal relationships as Yoko did. Of the two, John, the airy Aquarian moon, on occasion, needed to spend more time by himself and enjoy his solitude. Both were intellectual purists, and will have a lot of interesting things to talk about or teach each other. Complete emotional gridlock was avoided when both of them kept letting one another know where they stood emotionally, instead of hoping their issues will disappear on their own. Lunar Sagittarian Yoko may not have been as independent as John, and may on occasion, have demanded more time and attention from him than he could comfortably give. Another note that might helped this couple revolve around the Yoko’s fiery emotions. Jupiter rules the Sagittarius sign and controls, to a large extent, how this lunar sign processes emotions. As such, Jupiter makes Sagittarius types rather intense in their own way and prone to experiencing every emotion in a big way. If an argument occurred, it was very beneficial if the subject was broached calmly and peacefully, as this will have had a better effect on Yoko’s logical lunar Aquarian Moon husband, who shrinks from outbursts and loud accusations. Yoko was a patient and cool-tempered lunar Sagittarian, and as such, she was able to enjoy a long and successful relationship and marriage with John.

Venus-venus synastry: With his Venus in Virgo and hers in Aquarius, there was not much common ground to hold these two together, so this pairing is usually a case of ‘here today, gone tomorrow’. She was too bohemian for his more traditional tastes, and he was too sensible and conscientious for her. However since his sun was in Libra there was a better chance of long-term survival.

Mars-mars synastry: With her Mars in Virgo and his in Libra, they both set very high standards in the bedroom. Spotless hygiene, good manners and refined technique are required before she could relax enough to let go and really enjoy making love together. Minor irritations? She could be overcritical of them, and he annoyed her with his preoccupation with outer appearances. Also, her Virgo Mars in the 12th house accounted for her self-professed “lack of sexual adventurousness”, but it also meant that she was the power behind the public image of John, and often called the shots behind the scenes, often making househusbands of the men she had kids with (ex-husband Cox claimed that he was one when Kyoto was born, and Lennon was one with his son Sean). His 6th house Libra Mars mean that he often deferred to her out of peace but also out of love, and wanted to be of service to her. His power over her was the path of least resistance or passive resistance.

Planet dominance compatibility: His bold and hard-edged Sun, Mars, and Saturn dominance may have been at odds with her progressive and harmonious Uranus, Moon, and Venus dominance. John’s free, assertive and hard-nosed nature made him a bit impatient with her moods and conciliatory nature; however their sign compatibility made them more simpatico than usual.

Elemental dominance compatibility: Their mutual air dominance dictated that they were both communicative, quick and mentally agile, and they liked to stir things up. They likely were havoc-seekers on some level. They were oriented more towards thinking than feeling. They carried information and the seeds of ideas. Out of balance, they lived in their heads and could be insensitive to the feelings of others. But at their best, they helped others form connections in all spheres of their daily lives. His earth dominance grounded this union; her fire dominance provided it with passion.

House dominance compatibility: They had no rulerships in common; her most dominant house (the 5th) and his most dominant house (the 6th) dictated that they jointly believed in expressing themselves, however her need for it was manifested in a creative way; his need was manifested in an effort to refine and better himself as well as serve others. Their second most dominant houses (Lennon: 1st house, Ono: 12th) dictated that he was more of a vicious brute and sniveling baby, and she was more nebulous and vague in her interactions with others. Also this revealed how his childhood shaped his personality; he was the abandoned, needy child had never grown up. John adored and was in awe of his mother Julia and looked for her in every woman he met. Julia was warm, welcoming and bohemian, with a cheap but appealing glamour. Both he and his mother were daring, spirited sorts with a disdain for authority. It was Julia who paid for John’s first guitar, Julia who taught him the chords, Julia who invited him to practice at her place, since his stern aunt Mimi disapproved. Soon, he was spending nights at Julia’s. In retaliation, Mimi had John’s beloved dog Sally destroyed. The pet had been a lifeline to John, a link to Uncle George. John was shattered, and gravitated towards Julia and converted this cruelty into devotion. Their third most dominant houses (Lennon: 11th, Ono: 3rd) dictated that he had a love for humanitarian issues and friendships; she had a love for communication, especially through her art.

Sign dominance compatibility: Their most dominant signs (Lennon: Libra, Ono: Aquarius) dictated that this was a near-perfect match. Relationship-minded Lennon may view the quirky Ono as too independent and bohemian, and she can find his hesitancy and indecision annoying. Even so, these two have a great deal in common. They both tend to live in their minds, and need mates who were mentally alive. Their 2nd most dominant signs (Lennon: Taurus, Ono: Virgo), which dictated that sexually, this pair was well matched. Although she may have been slower to arouse, he had a ton of patience. With tenderness, warmth, and affection, he easily melted her well-known reserve. Overall, these two got along famously, and these two built a rich and rewarding life together. Their 3rd most dominant signs (Lennon: Aries, Ono: Libra) dictated that the chemistry between them was strong, and lovemaking was pleasurable and mutually rewarding. Moreover, they were both fun-loving and gregarious, and enjoyed an active social life. Even so, he could be driven to distraction by her indecisiveness, and she may have felt pressured by his super-fast decision making.

Venus-Vertex: The compatibility of her Venus and his Vertex (her Venus in Aquarius and his Vertex in Libra) as well as her 7th house Vertex that falls on his ascendant in Aries indicated this was a deeply fated and committed relationship. Feelings of friendship were also very strong. John was always desperately looking for love. The trouble with John, whenever he found it, he grew terrified of losing it. So he would react against it, and push it away. Happy love relationships were necessary for his physical well being. For her, marriage for money or status was also a goal.

Lilith: This was a very strong Lilithian relationship, but with their Liliths being in the lighter and noncommittal signs of Pisces (Lennon) and Gemini (Ono), it turned an otherwise dark obsession into something almost innocent and childlike yet still quite unconventional and polarizing nonetheless. His Lilith in Pisces was a powerful muse in his life as an innovative male thinker; he was dangerously attracted to women who were natural born mystics and cultivated their own myth, especially a Pisces rising, sun, moon, venus, mars, or dominant. However, Yoko is 12th house dominant, and her mercury and north node was conjunct his Lilith, so this added to his Lilithian attraction to her. Possible psychoanalytic explanations for Lennon's issues include his tumultuous relationships with his parents. Lennon's father abandoned him—which Lennon never forgave him for, despite his father's repentance—and in a 1979 audio confession, Lennon revealed that as a teen he bore sexual desires for his mother (who was a Pisces). He later regretted not having made a move on her. Ono’s Lilith in Gemini was in a strong positive aspect with two of Lennon’s major planets of attraction (sun, moon) as well as his ascendant, hence their obsessively co-dependent passion; he was obsessed with her mind and way of thinking as well as a harboring a very real romantic nature towards her. She made her mark on him completely.

Notable Aspects:

***orbs of 0 degrees (”tight orbs”) indicate that a relationship gets the full strength of that particular aspect’s energies. The higher the orb’s degrees are, the more diluted that aspect’s energies are to the relationship.***

jupiter square venus (orb: 0°) - Both Yoko and John felt a strong attraction and enjoy many pleasurable activities. Together Yoko and John enjoyed good fortune, exploring the realms of higher learning, culture, religion or metaphysics. They delighted in traveling to foreign lands, meeting new people and discovering different ways of life. Initially this union expanded their horizons and the attraction is strong. The trouble was that John couldn’t seem to settle down, always looking for new horizons. He wanted romance and excitement on a grand scale and expected Yoko to join in. Yoko also wants romance, but needs the security of commitment. John does not want to make a commitment. John enjoyed his freedom and couldn’t understand why Yoko is so insecure about their relationship. As the relationship progressed John became more impatient which in turn increases Yoko's insecurities. saturn square venus (orb: 0°) - On the one hand both Yoko and John loved each other and wanted to form a successful and loving bond. However, on the other hand they have to strive hard to overcome their misunderstandings of each other. Yoko wanted fun and pleasure. She had a lot of love to give, but had difficulty finding avenues through which to communicate her feelings to John. Yoko believed that John may be blocking any progress in their relationship, inadvertently spoiling the fun. At times Yoko feared that she will be stifled as the relationship continues. John took this relationship seriously, perhaps a little too seriously. He had difficulty overcoming his concerns about how the relationship should progress. John was a little too rigid in his beliefs, fearing true intimacy. The challenge for both Yoko and John was to face their fears and find a path forward. With hard work and determination they built a secure partnership based on mutual respect and love. While this combination of planets can indicate a serious personal relationship, it can also depict a partnership formed for the purpose of an artistic or creative project requiring both inspiration and hard work.  mercury trine north node (orb: 0°) - John and Yoko were destined to meet and learn from each other. Yoko gained insight and understanding through her association with John. John was a teacher imparting specific knowledge, or maybe John's presence communicated certain messages that were valuable for Yoko's life lessons. Either way John and Yoko were comfortable interacting with each other. Combined with other aspects in their synastry chart, this association indicates an intellectual rapport as well as a passionate or emotional bond. chiron octile mars (orb: 0°) - Yoko and John had difficulty overcoming past hurts and failures in their relationships. As a result their unresolved problems had an impact on this union. In particular, John's insecurities had a profound effect on this liaison. John was sensitive because of bad experiences in previous relationships. This caused problems in this association, because unwittingly, John reacted pessimistically to certain aspects of Yoko's behaviour. Unless Yoko always behaved in an understanding and compassionate manner, John took offense. This is because John was predisposed to view Yoko's actions in a negative light. It is possible that Yoko lacked sympathy to John's problems, but not necessarily so. The onus was on both Yoko and John to become aware of the problems so that they could heal these problems from the past and progress in a more joyful manner in their relationship. mercury trine mercury (orb 1°) - This combination indicates a meeting of true minds. John and Yoko were able to converse easily with each other, sharing the stimulation of exchanging thoughts and opinions. They also shared a similar outlook on life. John and Yoko understood each other and felt at ease together, enjoying each other's company. Lively conversations and shared pastimes featured in this relationship. They were able to appreciate each other's sense of humour and make light of any difficult arguments, often finding a creative way of approaching problematic subjects. In other words this was a harmonious combination and augured well for the relationship. John and Yoko's communication took the form of letter writing or the exchanging of notes. Whatever the form of communication it was important that both John and Yoko keep in touch. This was an ideal combination for a personal love relationship and friendship. It is also beneficial for a work association, which required an intelligent and energetic approach to a joint project or task. ascendant conjunct uranus (orb: 1°) -  Yoko and John felt strongly drawn to each other. Yoko was enthusiastic about her relationship with John. She enjoyed exploring new territories with John. On the whole this was a positive combination, but only if Yoko and John allowed each other a great deal of independence. In particular Yoko craved the freedom to explore her own interests. Both Yoko and John enjoyed the fun and excitement of a brief encounter and, due solely to the other factors in their charts, made solid plans for a shared future. mercury square saturn (orb: 1°) - Problems these two have could include poor communication, judgmental or critical attitudes to each other or a fear of intimacy. On a positive note both John and Yoko shared a mutual respect for each other and were willing to work towards sound communication. However, they were likely to strike obstacles along the way, which will test their commitment. If John and Yoko overcome these obstacles then they will have strengthened their bond. If not, one or both of them was likely to feel imprisoned by the relationship. John's self-esteem was adversely affected if Yoko was too critical. A personal relationship is the most difficult to balance with this combination. A working relationship is also a challenge. mercury sextile neptune (orb: 1°) - Both John and Yoko felt excited by this union. Their imaginations were enlivened. In particular John's ideas were encouraged by Yoko's creative input, enabling him to better express himself. They worked together on a creative project. Communication had an easy flow, more intuitive than concrete. John and Yoko established an empathetic bond which enabled them both to exchange their thoughts and feelings with ease. John and Yoko felt very much in love, viewing their union through rose-coloured glasses. Whatever the nature of the relationship, John and Yoko shared an interest in the arts, a spiritual path and/or a philanthropic activity. north node trine saturn/south node sextile saturn (orb: 1°) - Yoko's Saturn is combining with John's Node indicatied that this was a significant relationship. Yoko and John felt strongly drawn to each other, perhaps experiencing a sense that their relationship was written in the stars. In other words they felt as though they were destined to meet and form a union.  north node sextile moon (orb: 1°) - This was an important personal relationship, one that changed the course of Yoko's life and deeply affected John. Yoko and John felt strongly drawn to each other, perhaps experiencing a sense that their relationship was written in the stars. In other words they may have felt as though they were destined to meet and form a union. Whether the path of this relationship was smooth or rough, Yoko and John's paths were meant to cross. Passion ignited, anchored by a very real friendship. mc sextile north node (orb: 1°) -  Power was extremely individualistic and desired personal freedom in all personal relationships, including marriage. Annabella’s popularity with others and contacts with the public were erratic and unstable. He tended to suddenly meet and fall in love then end it just as suddenly. She regarded her spouse as more of a friend than a mate.    chiron quincunx sun (orb: 1°) - Yoko and John were presented with the challenge of reassessing their life goals in order that they may head in new directions. This relationship was a significant one enabling both Yoko and John to grow and change, but only after some soul searching. As a result of this union Yoko discovered new talents and a new sense of self and John found a new role as a teacher or healer. However, initially they had to overcome old hurts which stood in the way of honest communication. The path to greater self-understanding was not always smooth and this relationship is one of the lessons on the journey. Through delving into past hurts, this union could be a healing one and through each other Yoko and John can learn valuable lessons. It was important that Yoko and John developed compassion and understanding for each other. Otherwise they may unwittingly contribute to further emotional pain. ascendant quincunx jupiter (orb: 1°) - Power had a transforming affect on his relationship with Annabella and his environment and she was able to accept change and come to terms with new phases of her life with him and without him. They were both able to raise the level of awareness in others by altering their mode of personal interaction with each other. jupiter trine mars (orb: 2°) - Yoko and John were able to combine their talents well under the positive influence of the planets Mars and Jupiter. Their association provided them both with a zest for life. Yoko had the drive necessary for any joint projects, and John had the know-how and planning capabilities. Yoko and John set goals, worked towards them while overcoming obstacles along the way. Together they successfully achieved their ambitions. They enjoyed collaborating, gaining the respect of each other in the process. Yoko admired John's inspirational ideas. In turn John appreciated Yoko's initiative and energy. As well as working together Yoko and John also delighted in playing together. It's possible that they enjoyed sharing travel and sporting activities. Whatever joint project they undertook Yoko and John enjoyed good fortune. saturn quncunx moon (orb: 2°) - Yoko and John can both suffer from feelings of discontent and insecurity within this union. They worked hard to cover up their sense that some emotional warmth is lacking, but there were times when they despaired of getting their needs met. Yoko felt this lack of emotional warmth keenly. It was difficult for her to relax and feel truly appreciated in this relationship. John brought a certain coldness to the union, finding it difficult to generate emotional warmth. John may have felt that his attempts at intimacy were misunderstood and met with an overly-emotional reaction from Yoko. Much work needed to be done in order to understand each other. On a positive note they were committed to resolve difficulties. Therefore Yoko and John had the strong possibility of being able to stay in this relationship on a long-term basis and reap the rewards of a stable and secure union. A satisfying relationship resulted from Yoko's and John's patience and persistence. saturn trine mars (orb: 2°) - Yoko and John were striving to build something concrete whether it be a future together or work project. Together they had the strength and wisdom to achieve a shared ambition. This was not a flighty association. Both Yoko and John were aiming for a long-term and stable partnership. For this reason the union involved a contract, in their case, a marriage contract. There was a strong sense of destiny linked with this union. Yoko contributed the drive and initiative and John possesses the stability and practical aptitude. Yoko wanted to move forward, inspiring John to overcome obstacles that stood in their path. Yoko was full of enthusiasm, whereas John was more cautious. At times Yoko pushed John forward. At others John restrained Yoko, proving that there is wisdom in a slow but sure path. Together they achieved success in their joint enterprises in the long term. neptune sesquisquare venus (orb: 2°) - Yoko and John met and fell deeply in love, fully appreciating each other's unique qualities. Romance abounds. Together Yoko and John felt that they have found true love such as only Romeo and Juliet and Daphnis and Chloe experienced. However, there are problems. Yoko and John found that the initial idyllic love can start to prove illusory in the long term. As the relationship developed it became more difficult for them to escape from the demands of the mundane world into a world of romance. They become disillusioned. They would rather stay lost in a sea of blissful love than be reminded of the responsibilities of their separate lives. Both Yoko and John were vulnerable in this state of pretense. They needed to be wary of circumstances or people who preyed on their impressionable state. In particular they needed to avoid any spiritual groups, drugs and artistic enterprises that may be deceptive in their nature. Once Yoko and John have learned to face their relationship honestly and with discrimination then they were able to enjoy a creative and loving partnership as well as artistic and spiritual pursuits.  uranus conjunct chiron (orb: 2°) -  John and Yoko were able to leave behind painful memories of previous associations and pave new paths of understanding. Together they enjoyed exploring new ways of communicating and learning about each other and their own personal lives. They were an inspiration to each other. John challenged Yoko to enter new territory. John motivated radical changes in Yoko's life, which were healing in certain ways. Yoko offered new insights which inspired John to new creative heights. Together John and Yoko explored unorthodox methods of healing. north node trine chiron (orb: 2°) -  The healing powers of nature, music and the arts played a significant role in this union. John and Yoko had a romantic and empathetic relationship, in which they both placed importance on gentle and loving communication. As a result they were able to forgive and forget loved ones who have hurt them in the past, and move slowly towards a better understanding of their innermost selves and each other. The artistic and spiritual side of John's nature proved particularly healing for Yoko. Under John's gentle influence, Yoko was able to heal past emotional wounds and better express herself. Together they took part in a spiritual, healing or artistic project. north node trine venus (orb: 3°) -  This is the combination for lovers. This association was written in the stars. Yoko and John were in love, desiring to form a close and romantic bond, rather than remain friends only. Passion, romantic love and an intense desire to relate were central to this relationship. Within moments of meeting Yoko and John felt as if they had known each other for years. They enjoyed each other's company, discovering pleasures in common.  This was not an association to take lightly. It easily took over Yoko or John's lives. sun trine venus (orb: 3°) - It's likely that John and Yoko felt a strong attraction when they first met, falling deeply in love. However, John and Yoko were likely to remain friends even if they did not maintain an intimate partnership. Both John and Yoko felt at ease in each other's company, because they both felt that the other person was contributing positively to the union. As a result John and Yoko can relax and enjoy the benefits of their friendship. They seemed to be able to settle arguments in a friendly and loving fashion, communicating with ease. John felt that Yoko enhances his sense of self. He felt valued by Yoko and this helped him to truly shine in the world. Yoko felt that her creativity was enhanced by her relationship with John. The warmth and generosity of John helped Yoko better express herself in relationships. Yoko also benefited financially through her association with John. jupiter square saturn (orb: 3°) - John and Yoko had difficulty find the right balance between boldness and caution. On the one hand John was the risk-taker in this relationship, the person wanting to explore new territories and activities. He was excited by the many possibilities available as a result of this partnership's resources and felt constrained by Yoko. This is because Yoko erred on the side of discretion. She believed that a slow but sure approach was a sure sign of success. Yoko believed in the edict "moderation in all things", whereas John espoused the adage "nothing ventured, nothing gained". Neither John nor Yoko listened to each other. Both had trouble seeing things from the other person's point of view. It is possible that John and Yoko have met in order to learn something from each other in order to become stronger and wiser for future relationships. moon trine ascendant (orb: 4°) -  John's Moon combining with Yoko's Ascendant indicates that this was a significant personal relationship. John and Yoko felt strongly drawn to each other, enjoying a strong and loving bond. This relationship satisfied the emotional needs of John, who felt comforted by relating to Yoko. John gained new insights about himself and relating through his association with Yoko. In turn Yoko was attracted to John's willingness to be vulnerable and loving, and felt supported by this union. While this combination is most likely to indicate an intimate love union, it can also augur well for friendships, family relationship and work associations. jupiter trine neptune (orb: 4°) -  Both John and Yoko understood and shared each other's aspirations and dreams. At times their intuitive understanding of each other was so keen that they almost seem telepathically linked. It was possible that both John and Yoko shared a spiritual or religious conviction and belonged to the same group or church. This may have been a central force in their association. It is also possible that they took part in a philanthropic pursuit such as mission work in a foreign country or working for the same charitable organization. Whatever the outlet for their beliefs, both John and Yoko appreciated and enjoyed each other's values, thus enabling them to better pursue a more altruistic path in life. John and Yoko brightened each other's lives through their shared beliefs. sun opposing uranus (orb: 4°) -  John and Yoko were attracted to each other from the moment that they first meet and continued to experience excitement and joy in each other's company. Despite this sense of adventure, John and Yoko may have trouble maintaining a committed, long-term relationship. The initial enthusiasm can fade as John and Yoko began to experience the need to accommodate each other's needs and desires in this union. John and Yoko were each determined to maintain their individuality, which presented problems for any union that requires compromise. John and Yoko both wanted to do things their own way and became rebellious if the other person presented any obstacles. This was particularly true for Yoko, who stressed her individuality and can be unwilling to adjust to the demands of a serious relationship. Yoko did not want to be overridden by what she perceived as John's strong personality and may have had problems showing a long-term commitment. Likewise John believed that Yoko stood in the way of him expressing his true nature. On a more positive note this association brought something new and original into John and Yoko's lives and they both felt enlivened as a result. venus opposing sun (orb: 4°) -  Yoko and John felt a strong attraction to each other, but they couldn’t seem to communicate in a harmonious manner. Joint decisions about relationships were difficult. Yoko and John argued about subjects such as the future of their relationship, family associations, money matters and creative pastimes. They just couldn't seem to agree. Yoko felt frustrated. On the one hand Yoko was drawn to John. On the other hand Yoko knew that she was losing her identity in this relationship, and is often floundering to express herself. John was also frustrated. He felt overwhelmed by Yoko's powerful personality and was unable to get on with his creative pursuits. Neither Yoko nor John really felt that they were benefiting from this union, and yet they felt drawn to try to resolve the problems. Yoko and John finally decided to resolve their differences. They may have needed to seek counsel on how to resolve their differences. venus opposing mercury (orb: 4°) -  No matter how hard Yoko and John tried they found it hard to relax in each other's company. Disharmony seemed to infiltrate their union at every turn. The problem was that Yoko and John simply could not find any common ground for agreement. Their opinions and values clashed, which made any shared activities fraught with tension. In particular John felt that he was subjected to Yoko's unnecessary criticism. John felt unappreciated and lonely, unable to share warm and loving moments required in his relationship. On the other hand Yoko believed that she couldn’t express her opinions freely without being misunderstood. Yoko lost confidence in her communication abilities and possibly withdrew her attention from the relationship. The positive side is that Yoko and John were attracted to each other and worked towards improving their communication skills. In this way they learned to value each other. pluto trine moon (orb: 6°) -  This is an intense and powerful relationship. Yoko and John felt a strong attraction to each other, one that seemed to constantly draw them together. Sexual attraction may be powerful. Yoko's and John's deep feelings for each other needed to be nurtured in a loving manner in order for the union to be long lasting. This relationship was a positive or a negative experience, depending on how Yoko and John handled intense feelings. Yoko was likely to feel that John has transformed her life in some way. It's possible that John has changed the way that Yoko felt about the world, making her conscious of things that have been bubbling under the surface for a long time. Life was not the same for Yoko once she encountered John. Yoko was able to see through the explosive behaviour to the true heart of John and to nurture John's goodness in ways that he had not previously encountered. As a result John deeply appreciated the emotional support offered by Yoko. This was indeed a passionate union.

[gay-spaghetti]

Evil Celine | Who Killed Markiplier? AU

evil celine evil celine evil celine evil celine evil celine evi-!!! ----

This is something I’ve been thinking about for a LONNNNG time, way back when WKM came out in 2017. I remember being so sure that Celine was bad. When DAMIEN came out though, I realized she wasn’t heartless, just stoic and strong!

Buuuuuut~~ this gives me the perfect opportunity me to go crazy with an AU! So what if Celine was the dastardly villain in all of this?

Here’s a summary of the AU under the cut! I’m planning to do a MAP in the near future, so keep an eye out! :D

In this AU, Mark is still a famous and wealthy actor, but he is widely beloved and rather charitable. He occasionally gets a big head, and isn’t always very modest, but he’s by no means a wicked or selfish person. He cherishes his career as an actor, and loves bringing joy to his fans. Mark is also head-over-heels for his wife Celine, a mysterious, and seemingly-magical seer. They met through her twin brother Damien, Mark’s good friend and town mayor.

Celine prides herself in her supernatural work, but unlike her husband, she views power and wealth as what’s most important. Manipulative, greedy, narcissistic, power-hungry---all accurate ways to describe her. Being extremely intelligent, she dropped out of college, viewing it as a waste of time. When her, slightly-younger, brother Damien became mayor, he introduced her to his friend Mark, a well-known celebrity. With Mark’s gorgeous looks, wealth, status, and sweet, flirtatious attitude, the two of them hit it off instantly, and got married a few years later.

After a couple of short years into their marriage, Celine realizes she’s unhappy and rather annoyed, knowing that she doesn’t really love Mark. Originally, she was going to divorce him, but she realized she didn’t want to lose all the wealth she shared with Mark---which technically all belonged to him. So to solve this problem, she resorts to killing her husband to collect the insurance money.

Celine figured this would be easy enough, but something rather bizarre and unexpected happens. After killing him, Mark just comes back to life within a few hours! The next few weeks, Celine does everything she can to end his life. She stabs him, drowns him, chokes him, poisons him, shoots him, and much more, but nothing is successful. He just wont stay dead.

During these attempted murders, Mark is scared and extremely confused, having no idea that Celine is the one doing this. He doesn’t even realize that he’s actually dying and repeatedly coming back. He goes to his dear friend and butler, Ben, to vent his fears and frustrations, going to Celine for comfort too, but she just tells him that these are all simple nightmares. Of course, that doesn’t convince him. Cuts, bruises, gunshot wounds, occasionally choking up water, and other sorts of horrible things are not typically symptoms of bad dreams.

Finally, Mark somewhat realizes what’s happening here. At the very least, he recognizes that his beloved wife is the cause. Celine attempts to kill him yet again, but this time, he was expecting it. After a fight and a loud argument, Mark forces her to leave his home. She happily leaves, finally revealing how she truly feels about Mark. Not only that, but just a week or so later, she gets together with Mark’s friend Colonel William, who thinks Celine and Mark just divorced.

Stricken with agonizing grief, anger, horror, and anguish, Mark soon devises a plan to get back at his sickeningly evil wife. This plan....is the poker party plan.... but with a few differences. 

Being corrupted by heartbreak and the dark influences of the manor, Mark’s scheme is cold and twisted. Not wanting an actual officer or detective to be involved in this, he hires a good friend he met in college, a fellow drama student and actor named Abe, to pretend to be a detective. Their plan was to expose Celine's horrid actions to her brother, and all of Mark’s friends. Ultimately, Mark was going to make sure that Celine “died” in that house, so she could feel exactly what he went through.

Things... don’t exactly go the way they were intended though.

Celine, Damien, William, and the DA are all invited to the poker party, with Chef and Butler Ben attending as well (Obviously). The plan kicks off with DA finding Mark’s dead body. Most of the same things occur; tensions rise, accusations are made, weird happenings from the house, and more, but this time, Celine is there from the start, and Abe is in on it. Also, the scene in the wine cellar does not happen. 

When Celine starts getting rightfully accused, William throws a wrench into things by repeatedly standing up for her, to the point where he and Abe start shouting and pointing guns at each other.

After hours of intensity, high tensions, and strange evil from the house, Celine attempts to put a stop to this. She goes into that small room with her brother, finally being able to recognize the dark powers lying within the mansion. She figures out what Mark is trying to do, and she tries to end it with her dark magic. Damien is scared, confused, and beyond worried.

Meanwhile, Abe hurries to the room to prevent Celine from stopping Mark’s plan, but William blocks him, wholeheartedly believing that his love is innocent. A loud and angry argument ensues, which leaves both men dead. William, a soldier of war, shoots Abe in the chest. Abe, a simple actor with not as much experience with guns as the Colonel, shoots William in reaction to being shot, getting him right in the head. Of course, he dies instantly, and Abe dies just a few minutes after, completely horrified by his actions and the overall situation. The DA is just as, if not more, horrified, having just seen two people kill each other.

While that happens, Celine is performing her wicked magic, her goal being to end Mark for good. She realizes though that for this particular spell to work, she needs a sacrifice. So, being the cold-hearted person that she is, she kills Damien---someone who loved and trusted her. This backfires, and the manor’s evil is proven to be more powerful than Celine. She, along with her brother, turn into the entity called Dark (Dark’s appearance more resembles Celine in this AU). In a confrontation between Dark and Mark in a black, endless void, Mark uses Celine’s life energy to heal his broken body, although scars still cover his form. He shames and condemns Celine for what she’s done, expressing his sorrow for Damien, and the rest of his friends, as he only intended for Celine to suffer. With that, Mark escapes his mansion for good.

The dust settles.... and the manor is quiet. The groundskeeper, butler, and chef, are all long gone, and death overcomes the building. Panicked, confused, and traumatized, DA leaves the manor, but is surprised to find Mark outside! Seeing the pain the DA went through, Mark is shocked, and even feels guilty. He apologizes, and comforts and reassures them, offering his friendship. Still wildly baffled, and a little hesitant, DA accepts.

Back inside the manor, around 15 hours after Mark and the DA leave, Abe and William awaken from their death. They are BEYOND puzzled and definitely traumatized. Stricken with uncertainty and insanity, the two leave together. Dark leaves too, but she makes sure she is not seen. Her quest to successfully kill Mark is nowhere near over.

Over the decades, Mark continues his acting career, but also starts directing! DA is along for the ride, and the two of them, now close friends, get into all sorts of shenanigans and strange adventures.

Abe and Will do as well, but this time, as friends, not enemies. They both lean into their insanity in their own way. They both suffer through it, but Will eventually starts to embrace is, and Abe is stuck feeling traumatized and helpless. As shown above, they become performers together to find purpose. Will becomes a joyful clown, and Abe becomes an anxious and sorrowful mime.

This Dark is very similar to canon Dark, but is way more evil and harsh. She’ll occasionally stick around with William (now Wilford), but is more often than not trying to sabotage Mark and DA’s adventures and shows.

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@itsjustkyss @smiledog15578 @huffle-puff-ego

So that’s my AU!! I know that’s a LOT of information.... oof :3 I really hope y’all like it! Feel free to ask me questions about it, draw art, and even suggest ideas for it!

Again, I plan to host an animated MAP for this AU, so keep a lookout for that!