#And that my entire existence is a bother to everyone else so i need to take up as little space as possible and be silent
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Why do i feel like im breaking 35 rules when I ask my friends if they want to spend time with me?
#Its the anxiety and my internal past trauma thats telling me im not allowed to bother people i like#And that my entire existence is a bother to everyone else so i need to take up as little space as possible and be silent#Its bc i want to spend time with them like all the time so instead im like.... Ok i cant ask once every month I'll tire them#I always am so aware that im expendable and forgettable so i feel i am not allowed to ask for anything and must#Always just stand around and be able to come by whenever my loved ones need me#Like i can only exist and see them when they initiate it and ask for me otherwise its not okay#I feel ive gotten better at being 'selfish'#But this is still so hard. Reaching out feels like asking for too much and even when they say yes i worry ive caused them#Problems. Cant imagine anyone liking my company and wanting to be around me
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A Cup Of Sugar
TW: age-gap (reader's over 18.), dirty talk, sex without condom, manipulative behavior.
SUMMARY: Your next door neighbor and crush asks for a favor and leaves with something else...
A Cup of Sugar
The blue house with the white shutters has always been a staple to your cul-de-sac community since you could remember. Block parties pulled everyone together through fake smiles to save face for those who would more than likely be thrilled to not have to speak ever again. But in the politics of jealous wives and HOAs came one glimmer of peace in your existence.
The man in the blue house and white shutters.
Rafe Cameron.
He stood classified to his thoughts, his eyes always dancing over some shaven blades of grass paid to appear so perfect. He offered the waves to those to his caliber and always left you with a kind smile before slipping back inside. And this is how it had been for two decades. Since you were the little girl with pigtails who walked over with your parents to welcome him and his wife to the neighborhood before you could even look him in the eyes. And now, you dreamed of those eyes looking down on you for an entirely different reason.
You were always on the cusp of being noticed, putting increases effort when it was least expected. Even going out to check the mail you made yourself flawless in what you could, only ever getting the politeness from him.
At least until your eighteenth birthday. You caught his gazes lingering, your heart picking up speed, and his words a bit more adult than normal.
-------
A knock pulls you from the mundane afternoon where even the recent slew of TikTok trends over your FYP page do little to pass the time. Once opening the door, you silently curse not giving yourself a once-over in your camera before pulling it open.
"Mister Cameron. My dad isn't here..." The corner of his lips pull upwards.
"I know. I'm sorry to bother you, uh...do you have any sugar?" You stare, helplessly lured and anchored into the beckoning of him. Having always been attracted to the forbidden man across the street of blue eyes full of intimidation and cautious hands silently strong, you find it difficult to keep from showing it.
"Sugar? Um...let me check..." You move inside and hear him follow in uncertain steps before the door finally closes.
Once you come to the cabinet full of baking ingredients seldom used, already aware if you have any sugar it is probably more in brick form than edible, you play the time anyway to keep him in your company.
"Is Madison making something for Cheer or-"
"Let me help..." He stands behind you, shadowing you enough to nearly swallow you in his height alone, as he reaches over the cabinet.
"This cabinet?" You nod, facing him. His smirk remains on you as he makes no effort to actually seek out the sugar and simply holds his hand beside you as if to block you in.
"Mister Cameron..."
"Did you know that when your window is open at night that I can hear you in my backyard?" You blush, trying to imagine if there was anything embarrassing you had done. Played music too loud? Argued with your (now ex) boyfriend and it keeping him awake? Talked to yourself? Only God, it wasn't about him was it?
"Did I? I'm sorry. If I was too loud-"
"I can hear everything from the concerts you put on...to that which you do after you think everyone has gone to sleep..." He leans against you, his cologne dizzying you.
"I..." There is no mystery to his thinly veiled innuendo.
"You heard..." You can't say the words aloud, never having the chance as nobody else has ever been so brazen.
"Everything, Y/N. Or at least enough to know exactly what it is you need..." You blink in disbelief as all words thicken on your tongue, refusing to formulate.
"I-"
"You don't have to deny it. I know exactly what you need....Let me give it to you?" You swallow hard, trying to understand how this is happening. Manifestation truly works if your silent prayers had gone unanswered.
"I don't know-"
You are lifted onto the counter and he stands between your parted legs. It is a quick moment that feels as if it is in slow motion to the feeling of his hands on you.
"You want to know what else I know?" You swallow and nod, curiosity succeeding over logic.
"You can only come with my name on your tongue..." He kisses you with intent. Not to be gentle or loving but to claim. He doesn't wait for you to find breath or even steady against him as he uses the grip on your hips to pull you to him. You hold at his shirt for stability and it only makes him growl as your nails find him instead.
"You need what only I can give you, isn't that right, sweetheart?" You nod, too intoxicated by his touch to want to tempt fate to sober.
"I know nobody will be home for at least a few hours. You know how I know? Because I made sure of it. Now open those thighs for me-" You open and he scoffs, rubbing his jaw as he sees you not only eager but ready as you've completely soaked through your panties.
"I've had to listen for months while you got yourself off thinking nobody could hear you. But I did. And I wondered if you were doing it just to fuck with me or if you were really REALLY that desperate to come...next time, you say my name I'm taking it as a call and I'll make you come. Bet this sexy fucking ass on that." He grips the part of your ass exposed to him before he leans forward.
"Because I've had to hear you and now, you're gonna show me..." He pulls your panties to the side and rubs his cock up and down those lips.
"God, you're so fucking wet, it's almost pathetic." He moans before pushing the bulbous head of his dick closer to your entrance.
"Yesssss." He hisses as you gasp. He's wide, thick, and hot in every sense of the word. The coarse hair usually hidden to the naked eye is now stroking against you as he pulls back far enough to see the slickness you left behind on him.
"That's it....coat my fucking cock." He groans as he continues to thrust brutally and withdraw in almost torturous strides as you are breathless and wordlessly in awe. It is erotic, and almost painful, before he huffs.
"You sound so much better stuffed with me than whatever you were doing. What was it? Hmmm? Your fingers?" You nod, embarrassment rising up your body.
"And it was only me you thought of, yeah? None of those useless boys who can only dream of filling you like I can, right?" When you don't answer, he grips the back of your neck. "RIGHT?!"
You nod as he hoists your flat feet up to the counter so you're completely wide to him. His speed is no longer traceable as he's just pounding into you. Hand stabilizing himself in the cabinet above you, he rams into you with the force awakening something bold within you. You claw at his back and through his hair before kissing him again, instigating it all as he reciprocates with heady excess.
"Trying to get me to notice you in those bikinis and shorts like I could ever ignore you? Fuck, Y/N you're so wet for me aren't you? Gonna come hard? Maybe I should make you wait like you made me." He patronizes behind a humored growl. His head comes back, throwing it in pleasure as his face comforts, mouth wide and almost in disbelief as he grips the flesh of your hips with a punishable clutch.
"You need to come, you come to me. For me."
"Mister Cameron-"
"You call me Rafe when I'm this deep inside of you. Understand?"
"Yes R-Rafe."
"Good. Now scream it while I make you come and then I fill you up." The kitchen shudders around you as he thrusts and retracts, in and out, hard and deep. You were already sore but now you feel expanded and exhausted as he grips the back of your neck and pushes his mouth against yours. Not to kiss, to inform, and maybe even earn through a clenched repetition of "mine".
"Say it!" He calls out as you nod, agreeing in desperation as he showcases his approval on the final snaps of his hips before you feel him flood your womb in all that you were responsible for.
"Ahh fuck, yes I needed that..." He sighs as you keep your eyes on him as he pulls out of you. Without a care to clean up anything more than the space between you, he conceals himself back within his pants and shakes his head.
"So fucking sweet." He walks to the door and you're suddenly left half naked and empty.
"Wh-what about the sugar you needed?" You question, hoping it'll make him stay. With his brilliant smile and tempting lips purposed to a smirk, he grins.
"I got what I came for,. sweetheart." You sit in awe, realizing he took more than he left, including the fact you hadn't come. It was a play for power you gave him willingly and as much as you wanted to be the one in control, you knew you'd falter against him. Having a taste of him, you were eager for the next. Suddenly addicted to the man across the street you've loved and lusted for in equal measure since you could remember...
MASTERLIST
#rafe cameron outer banks#outerbanks#obx#drew Starkey#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron#outerbanks fanfiction
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The Witch and The Carpenter
For the @steddie-spooktober day 23 prompt: Witch Rated: T | Words: 2862 | CW: None | Tags: fantasy AU, witch!Eddie Munson, carpenter!Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington gets migraines, Eddie Munson needs a hug, Steve Harrington needs a hug, they're perfect for each other hugs all around Divider credit: @saradika
Eddie hears about the new carpenter within hours of his rolling into town – of course he does; any witch worth their salt knows exactly what’s going on in their town at all times (it’s hard not to, when you’re the one providing the potions and charms that help everyone else keep their secrets).
His name is Steve, and he’s come with hopes of filling the hole left when Benny, the previous town carpenter, had died without an heir to his business. People say that he seems hardworking and capable, that he’s strong and handsome, that he’s friendly enough, but that there’s something a little distant about him – a little lonely (though the older ladies who give Eddie gossip do tend to romanticize at times).
Eddie doesn’t expect to meet him as soon as he does, but before even his first week in town is out, Steve turns up on Eddie’s doorstep, looking at once earnest and wary, and just as handsome as the gossip had said.
(Not that that last bit has any bearing on anything.)
“People in town say you’re the one to see for remedies,” Steve says when Eddie gets the door open.
“People in town say a lot of things,” Eddie replies. “But in this case, they’re right. Come on in.”
Inside, Eddie finds out that Steve is seeking a remedy for headaches. But not just any headaches; these seem to be full-body affairs that can keep Steve down for days at a time. He gets dizzy, nauseous, is bothered by any noise, and even candlelight can be too bright for his eyes.
Eddie mixes him up something strong, gives him strict instructions on how it’s to be taken, and then moves on to the matter of payment.
At that, Steve begins to look sheepish.
“I’ve only just set up my business. I… don’t have much money yet,” he admits. “I was hoping you might be willing to do a trade.”
Eddie cocks an eyebrow at him. “And what do you have to trade that you think might interest me?”
“Your door?” Steve offers.
“…what about my door?” Eddie asks after a long moment of confused silence.
“It sticks. You were having trouble getting it closed earlier. I could fix that,” Steve says.
And it’s true – Eddie’s front door does stick. So does the back door. The shutters often refuse to open or shut properly, and the porch sags a little, and there’s a leak in the roof when it rains hard enough. While Eddie is the best in the business when it comes to working magic, he’s not so handy with home repairs.
(It doesn’t particularly help that witches exist in an odd sort of social limbo. Every town needs one—this is generally acknowledged as truth—but no one particularly wants them around. Eddie lives a little ways away from town, up against the forest line, where it’s easy to ignore him and his shabby house unless someone needs something from him. No one has ever exactly been chomping at the bit to come help him fix the place up.)
Eddie shouldn’t say yes. He often trades goods and services, but he doesn’t know this man. He doesn’t know if he’s reliable, doesn’t even know if his work is any good – but something in him wants to agree, anyway.
Maybe it’s the earnestness of his offer, or the hope in his expression that he’s clearly trying to quash, or maybe Eddie’s just a sucker for a pretty face, but eventually he finds he can’t say anything but, “Okay, sure.”
“Thank you,” Steve sighs as he accepts the potion. “How would tomorrow work for you?”
Still not entirely sure he expects Steve to show up, Eddie says that tomorrow is fine. If he doesn’t show, if he thinks he can fleece a witch and continue living peacefully in town, he’ll quickly find out otherwise. And if he does come back – well, it would be nice to have a door that doesn’t stick anymore.
“What’s your favorite color?” Steve asks before he leaves.
“Red,” Eddie answers, one brow raised in a question that Steve doesn’t answer.
“Red.” Steve nods. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The next day, Steve is back bright and early with a bag of tools and a pot of paint. He tells Eddie not to mind him, he’ll just get to work and try to stay out of Eddie’s way, but Eddie can’t help but watch as Steve inspects the door hinges, the frame, and then not only trims the door down, but sands and paints it, too.
Red: Eddie’s favorite color.
Anyway, it isn’t Eddie’s fault for getting distracted. There’s an unfairly attractive man doing manual labor in front of his house, what’s he supposed to do?
Eventually, though, Eddie does force himself to look away. He shouldn’t get attached to things he knows he can’t have. He’s the witch; he’s in the background of everyone else’s story, he doesn’t get to have one of his own – especially not with someone like Steve.
And that’s fine, Eddie had accepted that long ago. He likes being able to help people, and it’s sort of the only thing he’s any good at. He won’t deny that it stings sometimes, the way people talk about witches—about him—but what should he care about what other people think?
In any case, it doesn’t matter, because once Steve finishes with the door, it’s unlikely the two of them will cross paths again any time soon.
Steve finishes the door (it now opens and closes smooth as butter) and goes home.
And comes back the next week.
“Finished what I gave you already?” Eddie asks.
Steve shrugs. “Stress always makes the headaches worse, and with travelling and setting up shop…”
Eddie nods, pursing his lips in thought. “I could make you a bigger batch, but it would cost you more.”
“I can fix those shutters.” Steve nods towards the windows. “And you mentioned something about the back door?”
“You’re going to neglect your real customers, spending all your time fixing up my house,” Eddie teases.
“I can make the time,” Steve says, smiling at Eddie. “I think it’s worth it.”
Eddie has to turn away again, reminding himself that Steve is talking about the medicine, not him.
He fixes up a bigger batch of that same strong potion he’d made the previous week (“I’ve never had anything work so well,” Steve had practically gushed. “It was more than worth my work.”) and Steve comes back the next afternoon to start work on the back door.
They talk more this time, when Steve takes breaks, when Eddie is between tasks and brings him cool water to drink, and Eddie finds that Steve is funny and sweet, and catty and sharp, and a bigger gossip than even Eddie himself. And he reminds himself, again and again, that Steve is not for him. This isn’t how the story goes.
Witches don’t get nice things.
(And that’s fine. Eddie is fine with it. He’s fine.)
They do, however, get increasingly nice houses, apparently. Or at least Eddie does. Steve paints the back door red, too, and then gets to work fixing the shutters. Those, to Eddie’s bemusement, he paints a buttery, golden yellow.
“They don’t exactly scream ‘witch’s cottage’,” Eddie points out.
Steve only shrugs. “It’s my favorite color,” he says, flashing a grin at Eddie. “Besides, I think they go with the doors.”
Eddie doesn’t argue.
It goes on like this. Eddie brews medicine for Steve’s headaches, and Steve finds things around the house to work on. He fixes the leak in the roof, the creaky porch steps, the drawer in the kitchen that will never stay closed; his business picks up in town, but he always makes time for Eddie.
As much as he can, at least.
“I’ve got a few big orders built up,” he says apologetically one afternoon as he collects his medicine from Eddie. “I’m not sure when I’ll have time to get to the cabinets like I said I would, but I can pay you–”
“Nah.” Eddie waves Steve’s offer away before he can pull out any coins. “I’ll just put it on your tab.”
Eddie doesn’t do tabs.
Steve looks skeptical. “If you’re sure…”
“Of course I am. And if, for some reason, you welch on our deal,” Eddie gives Steve a sharp grin, “I do know where you live.”
“You should come visit, then,” Steve says.
Eddie falters. “What?”
“If you want to, I mean.” Steve shrugs, avoiding Eddie’s gaze. “Just– if I can’t make it out here, maybe you could come see me, instead.”
And again, he’s so earnest, trying so hard not to look too hopeful, that Eddie can’t say anything but, “Alright, I will.”
The way Steve lights up at that is worth just about anything he could have Eddie do.
Eddie tries to remind himself of this as he ventures into town the next week.
He doesn’t go into the town proper very often; he grows a lot of what he needs and trades for a lot of the rest of it with customers; he’s a rare enough sight that some people stare, and whisper, and Eddie does his best to hold his head up high and walk without a care.
And if he pulls faces at some of the more egregious offenders, causing them to gasp and scurry away, scandalized, well – Eddie is allowed his simple pleasures.
Anyway, Steve is all smiles when he finds Eddie at his door, and that’s the most important thing. He ushers him through the shop (a large, warm space that smells of wood shavings and sweet smoke, just as Eddie’s come to associate with Steve) and into the living space above. He serves Eddie tea and cake with a studied nonchalance that says he doesn’t want Eddie to realize how excited he is.
How excited he is to see Eddie.
Eddie searches for anything else to focus on before he does something ridiculous, like act on the rising warm feeling in his chest. He finds it, oddly, in Steve’s eyes.
“Have you been sleeping?” Eddie asks him; the shadows beneath his eyes look almost like bruises.
Steve shrugs. “I’ve been busy.”
His hands are shaking, Eddie realizes, as he pours the tea for the both of them. Steve must notice Eddie noticing, because he folds his hands back into his lap with a little huff.
“Happens sometimes,” he says brusquely. “More annoying than anything. Carpenters are supposed to have steady hands.”
(Eddie wonders sometimes what must have happened to Steve, but he’s seen some of the scars that adorn his body, has seen the faraway look that gets into his eyes from time to time, and he thinks he knows. Steve has the bearing of a soldier, and the eyes of a man too kind to have ever been made to fight for a king who doesn’t give a damn about him.)
Taking the hint, Eddie changes the subject, but the thought of Steve’s shaking hands follows him home. All those tools, all those sharp things he works with – maybe Steve isn’t his, not his to worry over or to care of, but Eddie decides he’s damn well going to do it anyway.
The next time Steve comes by, Eddie slips him an extra packet along with his usual potion.
“You brew it like tea,” Eddie says to Steve’s confused glance. “Should help steady your hands, when you need it.”
Steve stares down at the packet for several silent seconds. “You didn’t have to–”
“But I wanted to.”
Shaking his head, Steve looks back up at Eddie. “How can I–”
Eddie waves him off before the question is fully formed. “Let’s say it’s on the house, for my best customer.”
“I’m not sure that’s a compliment,” Steve says, not without amusement.
“Then how about my favorite customer?” Eddie offers.
Steve is smiling now. “Are you allowed to have favorites?”
“I’m the witch,” Eddie reminds him with a smirk. “I can do whatever I want.”
And so it goes.
And so it might have continued going, if it hadn’t been for the night Steve turns up at Eddie’s door well after dark, looking grey and haggard and haunted.
Eddie ushers him in, sits him down, makes him some tea, and tries to get some words out of him.
“Do you make anything to help people sleep?” is what Steve finally asks.
“I can,” Eddie says slowly, watching Steve carefully.
Steve drops his face into his hands, rubbing harshly at his eyes. “I just– I just want to sleep. I don’t want to dream, just for one night,” he says, so low that Eddie has to strain to catch all the words. “Just once.”
Eddie weighs his options. He knows how to make an elixir for a deep, dreamless sleep; he won’t deny that he’s used it himself, when certain memories had become too much, but that’s exactly how he knows that it hits hard and fast. It can be disorienting – maybe even a little dangerous, if you don’t know what you’re doing.
“I can make something for you,” Eddie says, “but only if you stay here tonight. I don’t want you walking back home in the dark, it isn’t safe.”
“I don’t… I don’t want to impose,” Steve says, as if he could ever be an imposition to Eddie.
“I’d feel better knowing you’re here,” Eddie says, and that seems to break Steve’s resolve.
By the time Eddie finishes the elixir, Steve is barely awake in his seat. He doesn’t even argue when Eddie leads him to his own bed, lays him down, and tells him to drink.
He’s out like a light in minutes.
Eddie closes the bedroom door and sets himself up in a chair by the fire, but he doesn’t sleep for a long time.
He wakes in the morning to the sound of someone moving around in the kitchen. He follows the smell and coffee and sizzling bacon to find Steve there, flitting around the room, cooking.
“Hey.” Steve smiles, broad and true, when he sees Eddie in the doorway. “I was going to come wake you soon, breakfast is almost ready.”
Eddie blinks at him, wondering if maybe he’s the one who took the sleeping elixir, because he can’t quite fathom what he’s seeing: Steve, happy and sleep-rumpled, using his kitchen to cook breakfast like it’s familiar to him, like it’s something he does every day, smiling at Eddie like he’s the final piece missing from the morning.
“I don’t know how I’m going to repay you for what you did last night,” Steve says, determinedly poking at the bacon in the pan. “I can’t– I can’t tell you how much I needed that. How much it helped. But I figured I could at least start by making you breakfast.”
Eddie watches him cook, and feels like his heart is about to crack, because for some reason he’s getting this taste of what life could be like, but he doesn’t get to keep it.
This isn’t for him.
(And Eddie wants to be fine, but he isn’t. He isn’t.)
Something must show on his face, because when Steve looks up at him, his own expression falls into a concerned frown. He forgets all about the bacon and moves over to Eddie, arms outstretched to place his hands on Eddie’s shoulders.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, so invested, so concerned, that Eddie feels like he might lose his mind.
“This isn’t right,” Eddie manages, and Steve only looks more upset.
“Should I– should I not have done this? Did you want me to go, or–”
“I never want you to go!” Eddie blurts. “I always want you here, but this—this morning, breakfast, you—I don’t get to have this. It’s – it’s not right.”
Steve’s expression softens, eyes warming with understanding. “You can have it, if you want,” he says softly. “You can have me. You always could have. Since the beginning.”
Eddie shakes his head. “This isn’t… this isn’t how the story goes.”
“Then let’s write a new one,” Steve says.
There isn’t anything Eddie can think to say to that, but that’s alright, because that means his mouth is unoccupied when Steve leans in to kiss him.
Steve never has to trade anything for his medicine ever again, after that, nor does he have to come over to fetch it – he’s already there. Eddie’s house becomes the nicest in town, what with his live-in carpenter, and all. It���s painted in bright colors, and it draws people in, and makes them want to stay just a little longer, exchange pleasantries just a little more, and get to know Eddie just a little bit better.
Steve keeps his workshop in town, goes there every morning, and returns to Eddie at night. They start their days with breakfast together, and they end them in bed, pressed together like spoons in a drawer, and with every day that passes by, Eddie believes, more and more, that maybe this is something he gets to have.
Maybe this is something he gets to keep.
#steddie#eddie munson#steve harrington#stranger things#steddie-spooktober#this is one of my absolute favorites for this month#it wasn't at all what I'd planned on writing but I'm so pleased with it anyway it was so fun#solar wrote#eddiesteve
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Starting Over: Chapter 5 - Better
Mob!Bucky x Female Reader
Series Masterlist
When Bucky throws you out of the house for a betrayal and won't listen to your side of the story, you know the only way out is through - it's time to start over. Maybe this was never going to be your happy ending.
Hi! I'm sorry this took so long, work has been kicking my bum lately and I haven't had much writing time. But it's here - the final part! I hope you like it. Thanks to everyone who has reblogged/commented/engaged with this story - it means so much. Thank-you!!
💔
One week later…
You were cleaning tables when you glanced at the diner’s clock and realised it was almost 9am. Friday was here once again…
…Would he be in as usual?
It was raining heavily outside, throughout the early shift your regulars had rushed in and shaken the sogginess off their coats and umbrellas once they were safely over the threshold of the diner. You’d chatted with them, commiserating with them about ‘this damn weather’ and promising to warm them up with coffee and breakfast.
You’d spent your time off this last week popping into the hospital to see Lou. He was doing well, making progress, but the road to recovery was long. He needed to make major adjustments to his lifestyle and potentially engage in physical therapy as they think he’d also had a small stroke. He got his personal mail delivered to the diner and asked you to open it and keep him updated with anything pressing. The medical bills you’d seen were already dizzying and his insurance only covered part of it, but you couldn’t bother him what that just yet – he didn’t need the stress on top of everything else. You’d figure it out. You always did.
Lou had made you acting manager to pick up the slack while he was gone. You were pulling extra hours, working overtime to ensure the ship remained afloat while the captain remained on the shore. It was tough, but you couldn’t deny you loved the buzz of being in charge – of keeping everything moving.
You hadn’t seen Bucky since that night at the hospital. He’d insisted on driving you home after you’d said goodbye to Lou, ignoring your protests that the subway was perfectly fine…
“The subway, doll? Fuck no. Not on my watch”.
You’d rolled your eyes, knowing you didn’t have the energy to fight him after the evening you’d had. He knew it too. You’d merely sighed and hopped into the back of his SUV as you gave him your new address, giving a little wave to Clint who was driving.
The two of you sat in the back in silence for the entire journey, you watched the city flying past you from the window and it felt strange that the outside world was just continuing around you like normal while yours had almost collapsed.
The car rolled to a stop in front of your building, and you turned to Bucky. He seemed to be studying you carefully, concern drawn across his features. Even after all this time and distance, the beauty of his face still took your breath away at times.
“Thank-you…for the ride. For dinner. For showing up…all of it,” you said softly.
He nodded stoically, “always. Look…no matter what happens between us, I’ll always show up for you if you need me. Any time, any place. And Lou is going to be just fine, alright?”
Almost instinctively you found your hand sliding across the leather of the seat towards him. He looked down as your hand moved to find his. You clasped your fingers around his metal digits, the cool sensation against your skin was something you hadn’t felt in a long time. They in turn wrapped around yours and the two of you sat holding hands for a short while. You didn’t speak or look at each other, just both existing in the moment and concentrating on the feeling of your hands entwined. You paused, wanting to say more – but unable to quite find the words.
Eventually you couldn’t bear the strange tension in the air. You gently withdrew your hand and cleared your throat as you shuffled across the seat towards the door.
“Well, thanks again. And for the ride, too”.
“Anytime. Nice building…” he peered out of the window at your apartment block.
“Ah yeah, thanks,” you said proudly.
“You doing okay, living there?” he asked quizzically in his Brooklyn-lilt, his brows furrowed.
“Mm…I mean, it’s not as fancy as your place,” you chuckled, “it’s kinda cramped and small, but it’s cosy and warm. And it’s mine,” you told him with fondness.
He smiled, but it didn’t quite meet his eyes. “My place was yours too, you know”.
You chewed on your lip, you hadn’t intended it as a slight against him. “I-I know Buck…but…you know what I meant”.
He nodded reluctantly. “Yeah…that’s good. I’m pleased for you, really”. His nose crinkled as he looked at you fondly. It was a little mannerism of his that you’d missed.
You shared a small smile before getting out of the car and heading inside. You couldn’t quite bring yourself to look back at the car, a storm of emotions fighting to escape you. Your fatigue mixed with your anxieties about Lou, confusion about this sudden shift with Bucky now swelling. You could tell from the quiet behind you that the car hadn’t pulled away yet, no doubt waiting until you were safely off the street. You put your key in the door and quickly moved inside.
That was last week. You hadn’t spoken to him since, although you’d wondered if you should reach out. You thought he might’ve been in touch – a text, a call, but nothing. It was nice, he was leaving the ball in your court and not crowding you, respecting the boundaries you’d established. But part of you couldn’t shake the small sense of disappointment that lingered, too.
The fact was you couldn’t deny that something was stirring. Bucky, who you’d long written off and blacklisted for his betrayal, had started to be on your mind more and more. He had crept back into your brain.
You didn’t believe the old adage that time healed all wounds, but it had certainly helped. The space you’d had from him a year on from the incident had allowed you to find yourself again, the parts that you hadn’t realised you’d lost after diving headfirst into your relationship with Bucky. You still felt immense pain when you thought about what happened…but you also thought about how he had been true to his word. He hadn’t tried to force you back, not aggressively pursuing you or trying to talk you round. His weekly mornings at the diner had never felt pointed or manipulative. You believed that he was just happy to have you in his life, like he’d said. You’d since found your own place, started therapy and looked at your own issues, thrown yourself into work. Remembered who you were before you were ‘mob boss girlfriend’. You knew that what had happened with Bucky was not your fault, it wasn’t your job to reflect and change accordingly – that was all his. But still, having the space and time to work on yourself…it was refreshing. One small silver lining on this ugly, black cloud.
You’d also been on a few dates over the last few months. Nothing to write home about. A few nice guys, a few less than nice guys. Nothing had truly sparked for you; nobody had piqued your interest enough to want to really explore more than a few dinners or coffees. Maybe it was because of how things ended with Bucky, or you just hadn’t met someone right for you, or maybe you were just off dating altogether…But it wasn’t something you felt real enthusiasm for at this point. But that was okay. It had been fun to dip your toe back in the dating pool, and you weren’t averse to trying again when the moment was right, or you met the right person.
Unless of course, it was because someone else was on your mind.
Your slow burn friendship with Bucky had crept on you, taken you by surprise. The man who had once broken your heart now had a new place in your life. It was strange, but in some ways, you knew him better than you had when you were together. Despite your previous connection - your conversations had opened territory up you’d never covered together before, previously too caught up in passion and heat to dive as deeply as you had now.
And most importantly, he had shown up for you that night at the hospital, been there for you without you needing to ask. He had brought you dinner and stayed by your side without a word, because he knew you needed not to be alone – needed support. You were touched by his care for you, his willingness to clear his schedule for you at the drop of a hat. It meant a lot. It meant everything. He had intuited how you felt and acted immediately. He was there.
You didn’t know what it meant, if anything. Something had changed, the safe barrier of diner breakfast chats had been crossed. Part of you was panicking – no! Don’t let him get close, not again! Remember what he did! But another part of you had missed him deeply, longed to hold him again and wake up to him each morning. Your thoughts were a spiralling mass of contradictions and conflict, nothing made sense.
You weren’t sure if you could ever truly forgive him for what happened.
But could you try?
Roscoe snapped you out of your thoughts as he passed you the latest batch mail on his way by. You thanked him, flicking through the junk mail until your attention was caught by the hospital logo on one of the envelopes. You winced, tentatively ripping open the paper as you braced yourself for the latest bill.
You cursed under your breath as you unveiled the total figure, a stupid amount of money. You spiralled as it sank in, wondering if Lou would have to sell the diner in order to settle his debt. You knew he didn’t have anywhere near enough in his savings. You thought about all the jobs that could be at stake, including yours, and your heart ached most of all knowing that the restaurant was Lou’s baby. It would break him to give it up.
Maybe you could call them, sort out a payment plan…something?
You tried to calm yourself down, thinking about what your therapist would say about your immediate jump to the worst-case scenario. Relax. You can fix this. Remember your mindfulness exercises. Life would find a way.
The opening of the front door pulled you from your catastrophising. You glanced over, making eye contact with a rather damp Bucky as he entered the diner. He sighed, shaking the rain from his coat as he scoffed and rolled his eyes.
“A lovely morning…” he muttered, deadpan.
You smiled, stuffing the hospital bill into your apron pocket and going to grab the coffee jug, “Morning, Buck. Get a little wet?”
“A little,” he gruffed, slotting himself into his usual booth.
You chuckled as you filled up his mug.
“How’s Lou?” he asked, shaking the rain from his hair.
“He’s doing better, thanks for asking. They’ve got a whole treatment plan worked out for him - so that’s positive”.
“Good. Glad to hear. You over here running the show while he’s out?”
“Something like that,” you smiled, then shuffled on your feet as you realised you needed to talk to him. “Bucky, I-”
A loud clatter and exclamation from the kitchen cut you off, causing you both to look over at the disturbance. You sighed with exasperation.
“Ah. Duty calls…I’ll put your order in while I’m in there”.
You rushed off to sort out whatever mess waited for you in the kitchen as Bucky smiled playfully at your annoyance.
He noticed something had fallen out of your apron as you dashed off. A piece of paper. He leaned over to pick it off the floor for you in case you needed it. Before he realised it was private and had a chance to look away, his eyes were immediately drawn to the monstrous sum at the bottom of the page. Ah. He grimaced as he quickly put two and two together, folding the paper neatly and leaving it on the table. He took a sip of his coffee.
You appeared a little while later with his order, sighing heavily as you placed the plate in front of him.
“Sorry about that…Roscoe and Ron were fighting about if the bacon was too crispy, and some trays got caught up in the carnage. Never a dull moment around here…”
You suddenly noticed the paper on the table, your words trailing off as your eyes locked onto it. You snatched it away quickly, shoving it into your apron.
“That’s not…that’s-” you floundered, embarrassed for him to have seen it.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to snoop. You dropped it, so I picked it up and then realised what it was,” he explained softly.
“It’s fine. I’m dealing with it,” you shrugged, desperate to appear nonchalant.
“Sit down, doll”, he said sternly.
You scoffed, “Bucky…I’m busy running a restaurant here…”
He paused, looked up and bellowed across the diner, “Roscoe! Ron! Handle things while your boss takes a break!”
You rolled your eyes, turning to see Roscoe and Ron nodding furiously as they scattered and suddenly started working harder than you’d ever seen them. They had always been afraid of Bucky. You stifled a laugh.
“Problem solved, now sit,” he gestured.
You reluctantly sat down opposite him, “Bucky…”
“We’re gonna talk”.
“I don’t need-”
“No. Let’s do this”, he said sternly.
You folded your arms in front of you, fully aware that you resembled a petulant teenager but not caring enough to stop.
Bucky cleared his throat, taking a sip of his coffee before picking up the letter. “Now, I don’t want to overstep…but I can take care of this you know…”
You shook your head. “No. Thanks for the offer, but no,” you told him firmly.
“Alright. That’s fine. So, Lou has enough to cover it?” he asked, “all of it?”
You nodded a bit too quickly, “mmhmm”.
Bucky caught it immediately, your lie. You noticed the quirk of his brow and the subtle rubbing of his lips together. Damn him.
“Well, that’s a relief,” he sipped his coffee again and ate a few forkfuls of his meal, then wiped his mouth with a napkin and tilted his head quizzically. “Guess it’s all wrapped up, then”.
You nodded again in agreement, but knew he wasn’t done.
He took his time, casually taking a few more bites of his breakfast and sipping his coffee. You knew his relaxed demeanour was a careful façade…you had somehow found yourself at the centre of a famed Bucky Barnes interrogation.
You tried to appear relaxed, as if you had nothing more to add.
“Because…” he started.
Ugh.
“…because, if he didn’t have enough. That would be a problem, wouldn’t it?”
“Mmm. It would. But it’s not…so…”
“Right”, he cut you off. “But if he didn’t – great eggs today by the way – if he didn’t, that would be putting this place at risk, right? All the staff here and their jobs. Your job?”
“Right,” you replied, your voice a little strained.
“And of course Lou himself…he loves this place. It’s his baby. I’m sure he’d be devastated if he had to give it up to pay his medical bills. Especially as the last thing he needs right now is more stress and financial worries on top of his ill health”. He paused again to eat, not even looking up.
You nodded; your eyes now slightly cloudy now.
“Yep…” you said meekly.
He looked up at you, his eyes intensely locked onto yours, gesturing towards you with the fork. He was in full swing now. The diner suddenly felt much hotter, you could feel tiny beads of sweat forming on your forehead and the back of your neck.
“And I hope it would be known, if that was the case of course, that my offer would have no strings attached. Because I could imagine someone might decline it out of pride, or concern that it would have conditions and that person would then be in some sort of debt to me…either financially or emotionally. And if that was the case, I’d want to reassure them that it would only be a friend looking out for a friend, helping because I want to, and I can, and God knows I should do something nice once in a while to even out my moral scales…”
The barrier broke and your tears finally escaped, the stress about Lou and this intimidating bill, and your confusion about how you felt for Bucky, all finally coming to the surface. You cupped your face in your hands as you quietly sobbed.
“I’m sorry, I just…I…”
Bucky moved like lightning, whipping around to your side of the booth as he swung in next to you.
“Hey…hey, it’s okay. I’m sorry,” he said softly, “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just wanted to be clear what my offer entailed; but I understand why you’d be reluctant to accept my help”.
He pulled a few napkins from the dispenser and tenderly wiped away your tears.
“It wouldn’t be a loan, doll, and you wouldn’t need to make nice with me to say thanks. You could call me an asshole and dump these eggs on my head, and I’d still pay in full with a smile. There’s no expectation here, no contract – legal or implied”.
You sniffed, looking up at him blearily, “you’d really do all that for me…but…why?”
He paused, then very delicately used his thumb to collect the tears forming at the side of your eye.
“You know why,” he said plainly.
Your heart panged, and you looked down at your hands in your lap, clutching at one of the now-soggy napkins he’d given you. You sniffed again as you regained your composure, suddenly feeling exposed in front of him. The two of you stared at one another for a few moments and you were so desperate to tell him everything, but you couldn’t form the words. You hoped he would elaborate and fill in that gap for you, but he didn’t.
He quietly got up, putting on his coat and placing some bills down on the table to cover his check. He leaned over and kissed you on the crown of your head, then used a finger to tilt your chin up to look at him.
“You don’t have to decide anything now,” he told you as he looked into your eyes, “Think it over. I’ll be back here next week like always”.
He smiled at you, then disappeared out into the street. You heard the roaring of the rain outside as the diner door opened, the little bell above the frame chiming to announce his departure.
You missed him already.
You looked down at the hospital bill in your hands, the total at the bottom practically screaming from the page.
He’d hurt you so badly, you weren’t sure if you could ever fully forgive him for that fateful night. You understood it had been his insecurities, you understood he had lashed out after he thought his worst fears were realised – but that had only even explained his actions, not justified them.
Although…he’d always been there over the last year. Slow and steady, but he’d taken the time to rebuild his relationship with you platonically. He’d let you manage the pace, never tried to force anything more than you were willing to give him.
…and he’d been there for you.
He continued to be there for you.
It wasn’t about the money. He wasn’t trying to pay you off to win favour. He was just trying to be there for you, and this was something he had the power and resources to help you with.
He was your friend.
He loved you. He’d continued to love you…
“Are you back off break, boss?” Roscoe rudely interrupted your train of thought, “Ron said that the fryer-”
You were pulling off your apron before your brain could even catch up with your body.
“Nope,” you shot back, firing out of the booth at full speed as you tossed the apron at him on your way out, “a little longer…”
You left Roscoe gawping in your wake as you sailed through the front door. You yelped in shock as you stepped out into the downpour, you’d forgotten about the mini storm happening beyond the restaurant doors. It was so dark outside it looked more like early evening than the morning hours. You looked down at your immediately soaked uniform, your work shoes flooding as you traipsed through the puddles…
Focus!
You surveyed the street, your eyes catching a brief glimpse of the SUV turning the corner. The instantly recognisable JBB107 plates drawing your focus in the split second before they vanished.
And so you ran.
You sprinted after the SUV waving your arms, shouting for it to stop. A concerned elderly lady asked if you were okay but you sailed on by. You must’ve looked utterly insane.
You rounded the corner and rushed up behind the SUV as it slowed. The back door flew open, and Bucky suddenly appeared out of it, a look of horror on his face as the vehicle pulled over.
“Doll! Jesus Christ, what the- are you okay??” he shouted to you as you approached.
You didn’t answer, just flung yourself inside the car as you desperately tried to catch your breath. Bucky slid across the seat to give you room. The divider screen was up so you couldn’t see the driver. One less person to witness your mortifying display, at least.
“Fuck…you must be freezing,” he muttered as he pulled off his jacket, wrapping it around your shoulders and leaning over to close the car door behind you.
You were, your teeth chattered. Your hair was wet and matted, your uniform soaked through.
“Bucky…” you said hoarsely as you dripped all over his plush car interior.
“What is it, doll?” he asked, his eyes wide and alarmed, “what’s going on??”
You couldn’t find the words so you acted purely on instinct, you cupped his face and kissed him. Kissed him hard. Kissed him longingly. He caught up quickly and kissed you back, his fingers tangled in your soaking hair. It was desperate, messy. Your teeth clashed and your cheeks bumped. It had been so long that you’d lost each other’s rhythm with this. But it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. You couldn’t have waited any longer.
He pulled away, gawping at you incredulously as he held your face in his hands.
“Doll…does this mean?”
“Let’s go slow,” you whispered, “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. The effort you’ve put into rebuilding us from the ground up…for being my friend…for never pushing me…for Lou…but I’m not sure I’m ready to jump into this headfirst…whatever this is…”
He nodded, “of course, anything you want”.
“I’m not sure if I can…fully forgive. But I want to try,” you told him softly as you pressed your forehead to his.
He wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly as he sighed. A sigh of long held tension, of relief.
“Thank-you for giving me a chance…I didn’t think you ever would again,” he admitted.
“Yeah…well neither did I,” you laughed,
“What changed your mind?”
“Well…. how you showed up for me with Lou has made me rethink a lot of things. Plus…the money”.
He laughed, “the money? Really? This whole time I just needed to pay you off?”
“No…”, You rolled your eyes, “it was more that you offered, but you didn’t force anything, and you made it clear it was no strings attached. It’s like…you want to help me, but you trust me to make my own decisions and don’t just try and fix it all for me, like you used to. I just…it made me realise how much I’ve missed you. But it’s gotta be different this time…”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah…like…I want to stay in my apartment. And I want to keep my job,” you said firmly.
He nodded, “yeah. Of course”.
“Maybe I’d move back in with you one day…but I want my space”.
“Okay. You got it,”.
You smiled, “yeah?”
He smiled back at you, the smile that still made you weak at the knees. “Doll? If it means you’re by my side…Of course ‘yeah’. Anything you want. And I have some conditions too…”
“What?” you frowned. “This isn’t exactly a two-way negotiation, Buck…”
“Just…listen. They’re conditions for me. I promise I’m going to trust you entirely, and to communicate you with you properly – not let my emotions get the best of me. I’m a different man to who I was the last time we were together. I know how lucky I am to get this second chance with you. I’m not fucking it up. I'm gonna be...better”.
He spoke earnestly with such conviction that it was almost aggressive. You nodded gently, squeezing his hand. You believed him.
“Alright…well, let’s give it a shot, shall we?”
He grinned, “I can’t believe you’re here…”
“Me neither. But…I’m sorry I’m dripping rainwater all over your car”.
He shrugged. “Fuck the car”.
And then he kissed you again.
Maybe you did believe in happy endings.
THE END
There we have it! I hope you liked where it went. I know some of you didn't think she should ever forgive him and I understand, and I'm sorry if you're disappointed! But in my eyes he had shown her he was willing to change...and she wasn't trying to rush back into anything heavy. Thank you for reading!
If you liked this story, please consider supporting me with my Ko-Fi link 💐
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Strawberry Shortcake
-M.S
Synopsis; You won’t deny it, you are a very attractive girl. You were now a senior in highschool, and everyone seemed to have their eyes on you- except one boy, who just so happens to be the one you want the most.
Pairing; Virgin!Nerd!Sub!Matt Sturniolo X Experienced!Dom!Fem reader
Warnings; Smut, mentions of sh scars!!!! unprotected p in v [don’t do that you silly willy.], oral (m & f receiving), foul language, praise kink, pet names (baby, sweet boy, sweetheart), mommy kink (im sorry.), bondage kink, choking, BD MATTTT‼️
“Now, the boys want a taste of the strawberry shortcake
Thats my bad, thats my bad, no one taught them not to grab
Now, the boys want a taste of the strawberry shortcake”
{3rd Person POV.}
As you strolled through your school’s halls, you noticed everyones’ eyes were on you. It was inevitable. They always were. Sure, you understood that you were attractive, but so attractive to the point everyone needed to stare at you? Not nearly, in your mind. It hadn’t necessarily bothered you, it was only when people began getting bold, did it bother you. Constantly being cat-called with disgusting remarks about your body, people calling you a whore, (even though you had three bodies, which was quite a bit for a senior, but not nearly as much as others in your grade.), and people even asking you out, and you didn’t even know them.
There was one boy, however, that you did have your eyes on. Matthew Sturniolo. A name not known to many besides teachers, his brothers Nick and Chris, and obviously you. You weren’t sure why you have always been so attracted to him. The one boy who never paid you any attention, the one that might not have even noticed you existed, was the one you want the most. Odd how that works.
Matthew always seemed to pay attention in class. Him being one of the very few kids actually participating in class, most- if not all- of his responses being correct. He was seemingly brilliant. You always caught yourself staring at him in class, but he didn’t notice, so you never cared to stop. You realized that when he concentrates so hard on writing all of his notes down, he looks down at his paper, scribbling what seemed like his entire world, yet complete and utter nonsense to you. His glasses always fell slightly down on his nose, his tongue poking out of his plush lips, his hair draping down into his face.
You had always wanted to approach the boy, yet you could never find the words to. This never seemed to be an issue with anyone else in the school, just Matthew. You thought of just upright asking him on a date, but he seems to be the type to not like going out much. You thought about asking him for a book recommendation, but then you would probably have to actually read the book. Also, not a good idea. However, there had been one idea that had stuck with you. A tutor.
You wouldn’t technically be lying if you tell him you need a tutor. You were borderline failing all of your classes. You weren’t trying to- you just simply didn’t understand, and whats the point of trying if you’re not gonna get it anyways? You’d decided to ask Matthew after class today.
The bell rang shortly after, and the whole class left, as they all packed up early. It was the last class of the day, so you couldn’t blame them. Not Matthew, though. He didn’t want to miss a second of the lecture. You found it adorable how much he listens. Hot, even.
“Hey! Matthew, right?” You asked, approaching his desk. He looked down at you, and nodded. You’ve never actually been this close to him, before. His sharp jawline and accentuated cheekbones, his light stubble and his piercing blue eyes. You also hadn’t quite realized how tall he was, either. Not the tallest boy you knew, but you were much shorter than he was. “I was wondering, do you like.. Do tutoring?” I asked shyly, and the boy tilted his head.
“I.. I mean,” He started. His voice was soft, but slightly deep. “I’m sure I could, if necessary.” He shrugged. You let a small smile form on your face.
“Well.. Um.. Do you think you could tutor me?” You gulped. You don’t remember the last time you’ve been this nervous around a guy. Its just the affect Matthew has on you.
“I.. Yeah, I guess so.” The boy shrugged. “Um.. When do you wanna.. start?” He asked, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, his plain white short sleeve rolling up just the smallest bit, revealing a bit of black ink on his arm. Does he have tattoos that no one knows about?
“I’m free today, actually.. If that’s okay. We can go to the library?” I hummed. “Or my apartment, if you’re comfortable with that. I don’t live too far from here.” You offered, leaving the ultimate decision up to him, expecting him to choose the library.
“Well, it’s Friday. I’m sure there’s gonna be a lot of people in the library, and I don’t want to disturb them with us talking, so.. Your house, if thats okay?” He hummed, and your eyes widened. You were surprised that he agreed to your house, but not upset. Not upset at all. You could now have more ‘alone time’ with the boy.
“Yeah! We should probably hurry up, though. I don’t have my license yet, so I have to take the bus.” You spoke shyly, but he smiled. God, even his smile was amazing.
“No, don’t worry. I have my license, I can drive us.” He states, slipping his bag onto his shoulder, walking out of the classroom, leaving you to trail closely behind him. You figured Matthew would have his license, he seemed like the type. You jogged up to him, staying at his side. “I have to drop my brothers home first, if thats okay.” He states, more telling you than offering. You just nod.
You both made it to his car shortly after, and he offered you the front passenger seat, and he told you his brothers could sit in the back. You were the guest, after all. You both waited silently for his brothers to show up, and they eventually did. The slightly shorter boy with longer hair than Matthew and his other brother pulled the passenger door open, and his jaw dropped.
“No fuckin’ way.” He gaped, staring dead at you. Your eyebrows furrowed, and you quickly looked over at Matthew, whose face was bright red with embarrassment. “Matty! Ya finally pulling! Fuck yeah!” The boy laughed. Matty. Cute nickname.
“Shut up, Chris!” Matthew gasped, and you couldn’t help but giggle. Chris almost read your mind— probably not Matthew’s, though. The boy looked as if he’s never thought anything sexual in his life. “You’re so immature.” He scoffed.
“Aw, shut up. Don’t act like ya ain’t wanna hit that.” ‘Chris’ chuckled. “In the most respectful way, though,” Chris looked at you, smiling.
“Chris! Shut the fuck up! You’re so disrespectful!” Matthew grumbled, turning the key, the car starting. He swore. It was adorable.
“No- It’s okay. I’ve been called and told far worse.” You shook your head, reassuring both boys.
“Oh. ‘M sorry to hear that.” Chris frowned. “I hate people who degrade woman. Fuckin’ dickheads for real.” Chris scoffs.
“Yeah. I know.” I hum in agreement.
“Chris, get the fuck back here before you embarrass Matt even more than you already have. Look at the kid, for Christ’s sake!” The boy who was already in the back scolded. Both Chris and I peered over at Matthew, who’s eyes widened.
“No! Don’t look at me!” He whines, quickly turning to face the window. Chris chuckles, and shuts the door, heading to the back.
“It’s okay, Matthew. I think you’re hot, if it helps.” You shrugged, and the boy in the back fake gagged, and Matthew shot back around to stare at you.
“Hot?” He repeats. He acts like no one has ever called him hot before. It is a possibility, though. Matt was attractive as fuck, most people just chose not to compliment him, though, because he didn’t talk much. They call the poor kid a weirdo. You don’t think he is, though.
“Yeah.” You nod, and Matthew smiles.
“Just call him Matt. Matthew sounds too formal.” The boy spoke up, as Chris got into the car.
“Oh shut the fuck up, Nick. Always complaining about something.” Chris groans, buckling his seatbelt as the car began to move. The boys home wasn’t far from the school at all, so its not too far out of the way to your home. The boys teased Matt about going to my house, claiming that Matt was gonna get laid. Hopefully it was true.
“It’s that one,” You announce, pointing to a large building on left. Matt nods as he pulls into the large parking lot, which wasn’t very full. You led him to your apartment, digging in your pockets for your keys.
You lived alone, unlike most other seniors. All though they were eighteen, they didn’t have jobs or such, but you did. Your parents allowed you to move out when you were seventeen, and you’ve been doing just fine since. You pushed the door open, and walked in, kicking your shoes off, Matt doing the same.
“It’s.. nice, here.” He complimented; and you offered a bright smile. You usually did try to keep your place tidy, since it was only you, if you kept it clean, it’s the less cleaning you have to do overall.
“Make yourself comfortable on the couch,” You spoke, gesturing to the couch with a nice wooden coffee table in-front of it. “Want anything to drink?” You asked, but Matt shook his head.
“No, thank you.” Matt spoke, pulling out the math homework your teacher had assigned you. You made your way back over to Matt, sitting beside him.
Matt shortly after began his lecture, and if you were being completely honest, you actually caught onto some of it. Not most of it, just a little bit. But it was more than what you had understood from before. You knew that the math thing wasn’t what you cared about, though. Plus, knowing Matt, he’d never make the first move.
“I’m getting hot, i’m gonna go change real quick.” You announce, heading to your room. You weren’t hot. You were wearing jeans and a t-shirt, which in your opinion wasn’t revealing enough. You wanted Matt to make it obvious he wanted you before you tried to do anything. You don’t want to embarrass yourself. Once you get into your room, you rummage through your clothes. You finally found something that would do perfectly. Small cut shorts, that used to be sweatpants, and a tight cropped t-shirt. You went for more of a ‘casual’ look, so Matt wouldn’t get suspicious. You slipped your shirt and bra off, sliding the crop top on over your body, accentuating your curves and tits.
You found a pair of black lace panties, that didn’t do their job of covering you very well. You slip those on, and then slip the shorts on over them. You felt satisfied with your outfit choice, and you hoped Matt did too.
You made your way to the couch again, and as you looked over to Matt, he looked up at you. His eyes widened ever so slightly, and you could see his adams apple bob, his face turning the slightest shade of pink.
“Um.. R-ready?” He asked, and you nod, sitting next to him on the couch. You were so close, his leg brushed yours, but neither of you moved. “U-um.. So this-“ He said pointing at a random equation. “This is..” He sighed.
“Thats not the one we left off on, Matt.” You state, and he lets out a deep breath. “You don’t look so hot. Are you okay?” You hum, placing your hand on his shoulder, leaning forwards, giving him a glimpse of your tits. He glanced over, his eyes glued to your tits. “Eyes up here, Matty.” You giggled, grabbing his chin, making him look you in the eyes. His entire face was bright red.
“I-I’m sorry, ‘m so so so sorry-“ Matt whined. “I-I don’t know why I did that! Fuck! I-I just-“ Matt panicked. You took this opportunity to press your lips on his, immediately shutting the boy up. Matt seemed hesitant, but slightly kissed back until you pulled away.
“You’re okay, Matt.” You state, and Matt nods with wide eyes. “Did you not like that? I’m sorry,” I started but Matt shook his head.
“No! I mean.. I’ve just never.. done it before..?” He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. Sure. you figured Matt was a virgin, but surely he’s kissed someone before.. right?
“You mean you’ve never kissed someone before?” You questioned, and he nodded.
“Oh god… please don’t think i’m weird!” Matt pleads, and you let out a small giggle.
“You’re adorable, Matt. Why would I think you’re weird? You do know why I actually brought you here.. Right?” I asked.
“Oh- yeah. Sorry.” He states, slowly turning to face the paper again.
“No, Matt. I didn’t invite you here for that.” You hum, taking his hand. You slowly and gently place it on one of your tits, and Matt gasps and closes his eyes. You let out a small laugh at this action. “Open up, Matty. You’re okay.” He does as you say, and looks at you, wide-eyed, and mouth slightly parted.
“I..” He gulps. You could tell the boy obviously had no clue what he was doing. You knew you’d have to take lead, which was no issue to you at all.
You place your hands on his chest, pushing him back on the couch.
“Is this okay?” I asked, waiting for his response before moving on.
“Y-yes..” He nodded.
“Good boy.” You praise, and the boy whined. His sounds were euphoric to you. You straddled the boys’ lap, and his hands hovered over your hips, not touching you yet. “You can touch, baby. ‘S okay. I’m yours.” You reassure, before placing soft open mouthed kisses along the boys neck.
His head tilted backwards, allowing you more space on his neck. His hands gripped at your waist, having no other idea where to put them. You rolled your hips on his crotch, and he let out a high pitched, almost feminine, moan. You continued to kiss along his neck, rolling your hips on him, the boys’ grip tightened and loosened on your waist, as you pulled away from his neck, admiring the purple marks you had left on his neck.
“P-Please; I need you,” Matt whines, and you feel his throbbing cock through his sweats and boxers. You could tell he was big.
“It’s okay, sweet boy. Let me take my time.” You hush, and he pouts.
“Need you now,” He whimpers, and you shake your head in disapproval.
“So needy. Can’t even wait.” You scold. “Maybe, we should just continue with our lesson if you aren’t gonna have manners, hm?” You shrug, slowly removing yourself off of his lap.
“N-no! Please, mom..” He cuts himself off, throwing his hand over his mouth in embarrassment.
“What was that, sweetheart?” You hum, and Matt shakes his head. “What did you say, Matthew. Be a good boy and tell me.” You demand, gently but firmly placing your hand around his throat.
“Please, mommy. Please, I need you,” He begged, and your core throbbed. You sigh, before speaking again.
“Okay, sweet boy.” You nod, your hands resting on his waistband.
“Wait- I want to make you feel good,” He offers. How could you pass up something like that?
“Yeah? And how do you suppose you do that, Matty.” You tilt your head, stilling your movements.
“Can.. Can you sit on my face..?” He asks quietly. “Please..” He eyes your body up and down again, before looking away, seeming ashamed of himself.
“Yeah? Is that what you want?” You hum, and he nods eagerly, letting himself look back at you.
“Yes! Please, mommy.. I wanna make you feel good,” He whines. You nod, standing up, slipping your shorts off, leaving yourself in your lace panties, which hardly did their job of covering you up. “I… I’ve never done something like this before, so.. let me know if im doing anything wrong..” Matt whispers slightly ashamed of himself.
“Okay, Matty. I’m sure you’ll do fine.” I reassured him, before crawling back onto the bed, this time positioning myself over his face instead of his lap.
“Please sit, mommy,” He pleaded, and you smiled and gave him what he wanted. His tongue found it’s way between your folds, his lips wrapping around your clit.
“Oh- fuck! Good boy, you’re such a g-good boy!” You moaned out. For this being Matt’s first time at anything intimate, he was fucking amazing. The way his hands grabbed at your thighs gently, almost unsure of them being there, and the way the frames of his glasses rubbed against your inner thighs as he shook his head vigorously was driving you mad.
Matt whined at the praise, the delicious sound sending vibrations through your body. How the fuck was he so good at this? Does he watch porn all the time like a bad boy? Did he have his brother teach him? His brother was clearly a fuck boy.
“Oh, god, Matty.. Fuck-“ You panted, your stomach clenching. “Fuck,” You whined, “G-gonna make me cum,” You warned, and he let out a small whine. You felt yourself release on the boys tongue as his nose brushed perfectly over your clit, sending shivers down your spine. You began to stand up, but Matt pulled you back down onto his face, allowing himself to lap up your juices. You let out a small hiss, and he immediately lifted you off of him.
“Did I hurt you? I’m sorry, ‘m sorry,” He apologized quickly, his hands gently massaging your hips.
“No, you’re okay sweet boy. It wasn’t your fault, I just got a little overstimulated,” You run your hand through his soft hair reassuringly. He leaned his head into your touch, and you admired the way his glasses were slightly fogged up, your juices dripping down his chin. “You’re so pretty..” You hum, your hands slipping up his shirt. “Can I take this off, pretty boy?” You asked, gesturing to his shirt. He hesitated, before nodding.
You slowly lifted his shirt off, admiring his body. He was perfect, to you. You slipped his shirt off, over his head, and tossed it elsewhere in the room. Thats when you notice the tattoo you had seen earlier. It was on his inner bicep, and you admired it closely. It was a ‘N’ and ‘C’. Initials. Thats when you noticed something else. It was placed over scars, that Matt had done himself. Your heart sank; when you realized what they were from. You didn’t point it out, though. The tattoo must’ve been for his brothers, Nick and Chris.
“You’re so pretty, baby.” You hum, looking back at his face. When you said that, you saw all the worry leave his face. You leaned forwards, placing kisses on his collarbone, matching the ones you had left on his neck.
“Please.. Wanna see you,” The boy whimpered, and you pulled away from his collarbone, wasting no time slipping your own shirt off. This left you in your bra, shorts, and panties. “You’re so pretty, mommy.” The boy complimented, leaning forwards to kiss you.
You leaned into the kiss, slowly pulling his pants down, making sure to leave his boxers on him.
“Please—“ He whined, pulling away from the kiss. “I need you.” He hummed, and you let out a small giggle.
“Patience, baby.” You tutted, and the boy squirmed.
“No!” Matt cried out, slipping his own boxers off quickly. “Now!” Matt demanded, his voice loud, yet still submissive.
“Matthew!” You growl. “Stay put, and don’t fucking touch yourself. Got it?” You demanded more than asked, and his eyes widened.
“I— I’m sorry mommy, I-I didn’t mean to!” He wails, but you ignore his cries. You walked out of the living room, heading to your room. You rummage through your bedside drawer, pulling out three long strips of lace, perfect for what you need them for.
You walk back out to the living room, seeing Matt on your couch. You eyes widened and you stopped your movements. Matt was completely naked, rubbing his cock against your couch slowly, your shirt in his mouth stifling his moans and whines, his eyes shut tightly with tears rolling down his face. It was now when you realized how big he was. What a shame that he was keeping something so pretty away from everyone.
“Matthew!” You gasped, acting as if you had just walked in. “You’re such a dirty boy. How pathetic.” You scoff lowly, walking towards the boy. Hs eyes were now wide open, his movements stilled. He took your shirt out of his mouth, quickly covering his cock with it, insecure of the way you were commenting on him.
“‘M sorry! I wasn’t touching myself, mommy!” He whined. “I-I just need to…” He trailed off, clearly embarrassed.
“Thats still bad, Matthew. I thought you said you were a good boy?” You shook your head. “Sit up, hands behind your back.” You demanded, and Matt looked as if he were about to cry.
“N-no, please! I am your good boy! I-I promise! P-please..!” He cried out, but you shook your head.
“Good boys don’t do that, Matthew. Up.” I demanded once more, and he reluctantly listened, slowly sitting up, putting his hands behind his back.
“I’m sorry, mommy. ‘M really sorry..” He whined the entire time you tied his hands up. Once you were done, you laid him back down, moving down to his legs. You tightly tied them to the coffee table right at the end of the couch, so he couldn’t pull out of the restraints, but it wasn’t hurting him.
“Now you’re gonna have to hold still, hm?” You teased, walking along the couch, scraping your nails gently along his body, making sure to run them up his cock and back down. The boy was holding in his breath as to not moan already, at the slightest touch. You let out a small sigh, brushing the hair out of his face. “Such a shame you were a bad boy and now you have to be tied up.. I could’ve let you touch me..” You shake your head in disappointment, moving back down by his cock, before getting on the couch.
“I-I’m sorry, mommy.. Wanna touch you s’bad,” He cried, and you lick your lips, staring at his cock in awe. Out of the three others you had seen, Matts’ was by far the prettiest and the biggest.
“I know, pretty boy.. I want you to touch me, too, but you were naughty..” You tutted, and Matts’ jolted the second you rubbed your fingers gently over his tip. You leaned down, licking the vein along the underside of his cock.
“Oh! Fuck!” He yells out, squirming below your touch.
“Yeah? You like that, baby?” You tease, and the boy eagerly nods.
“Y-yes! Fuck, yes!” He yells out as you take his tip abruptly in your mouth. “Oh god,” He whimpers, as you swirl your tongue, collecting the salty precum, licking his slit. His stomach flexed and his back arched slightly. You knew this was his first time, so he obviously wouldn’t last long.
You slowly took the rest of him in your mouth, the boy’s hips sputtering, not thrusting though because of the restraints. You bobbed your head up and down, swirling your tongue around his warm wet cock, humming around him.
“F-fuck, mommy! I-I need to cum!” He warned, but to his surprise, you pulled off. “N-No! Please!” He wailed attempting to squirm out of the restraints, and you shook your head.
“This is what you get for not listening.” You explain, and he pouts, feeling his much needed release slowly fade away.
“Please…” He whines, and you move to hover yourself over him.
“Tell me if you want to stop, okay, baby?” You reassure, placing your hand on his cheek. “I’ll stop immediately.” I speak softly.
“O-okay.. Please..” He nodded, letting out a shaky breath. You began to lower yourself down onto him, sliding his tip into your wet cunt, causing the boy to attempt to buck his hips up. “Fuck, mommy!” He yells, his back arching and his eyes squeezing shut, as you took him deeper, bottoming out.
“Fuck, baby- filling me up so well,” You moaned out, beginning to bounce up and down on his cock slowly. He tried lifting his legs, but the lace ropes were not allowing him to. He let out loud moans and whines, hearing his sweet noises were beautiful. His legs began to shake as you rutted your hips against him, your clit brushing against him each time you threw yourself down.
“I-I- please, mommy! I need to cum..!” He cried out, and you leaned forwards, gripping his shoulders tightly, your boobs falling in his face. He took this opportunity to take your tit into his mouth, swirling his tongue around your sensitive nipple.
“G-Good boy, Matty!” You praise, and Matt lets a loud whine out as you clench around him. He came, but he felt bad for cumming without your permission. Even though you wanted to yell at him for it, you were too focused on how good you felt as you were fucking him, his face scrunched up in pleasure, as he licked at your tits.
You slow your movements as you let yourself go on his cock, letting a loud moan out in the process. You slowly pull off, immediatly plopping down on Matt. He let out a deep breath, placing open mouthed kisses to your neck, matching the deep marks he had on his.
A few minutes of you catching your breath and Matt sucking and biting at your neck, he pulled away. He began to stand up, and your heart dropped. You don’t want him to leave. You wanted to fuck him, sure, but you want him too. In more ways than just sex. You reached out to grab his wrist, stopping him from moving, causing him to turn to look at you.
“Please don’t leave,” You pleaded shyly, and he smiled. He leaned forwards, placing a kiss to your forehead.
“I wasn’t planning on it, darling. I’ll be right back.” He states. He then begins walking down the only hallway you had in your house, before turning to walk into the bathroom. You laid flat on your back. waiting for Matt to return, which he did soon after. He had a wet rag in his hand, which he used to gently wipe you down with. He then wipes himself down, and grabs your panties, slipping them back on for you, and rummaging through his backpack.
He pulled out a hoodie that he must’ve kept in there, and slid it on you. It smelled like him, bringing you comfort. He slipped his own boxers on, before picking you up gently into his arms. He begins walking down the same hallway he was down moments before, peaking into all the doorways to figure out which room was yours.
He finally found it, and placed you down gently on your bed.
“I’ll be right back, sweetheart.” He states, before exiting your room. You cuddled into the hoodie, pulling your soft blanket over you. Matt came back, moments later, your phone and his charger in one hand, and his phone in the other, which he held up to his ear. “I’m stayin’ the night here tonight, so have ma drive you and Nick to school tomorrow, kay?” He asked into the phone. He waited a minute, before scoffing and hanging up. “They keep makin’ jokes about me gettin’ laid.” Matt shakes his head, and you giggle immaturely.
“To be fair, they are telling the truth,” You shrug, and he lets out a small sigh, before plugging his phone in and crawling into the bed besides you. “Good luck at school tomorrow with them.” You joke, and his eyebrows furrow.
“Hm?” He asks, tilting his head.
“I marked ya up, pretty good.” You hum, and Matt’s eyes widen.
“Oh.. well, it’s okay. At least they’ll know im your man, and your my girl.” He smirked, gesturing to the same marks you had on your neck.
“My man? Your girl?” You teased.
“Yeah? Are ya not my girl?” He asked, but you shook your head, placing a kiss to his lips.
“Only yours.” You state proudly, tucking yourself into his body.
“Now, the boys want a taste of the strawberry shortcake
Thats my bad, thats my bad, no one taught them not to grab
Now, the boys want a taste of the strawberry shortcake”
『 ↳✧・゚ Finn yaps❕ ;
IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO WRITE.
˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱ I do NOT give permission for my work to be published on any other site, nor to be claimed as your own . However , reblogs , likes , and comments are much appreciated ! 🤍
ੈ✩‧₊˚ @bernardenjoyer @lovely-calypso @75sturn @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @junnniiieee07
#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#fanfic#christopher sturniolo#fluff#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#angst#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo fluff#sub matt sturniolo
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You know, given all of the cloning and other evil experiments that Palpatine apparently had going on, it's a little remarkable in hindsight that he never targeted Shmi Skywalker personally.
Like, this woman apparently reproduced asexually and gave birth to one of the most powerful Force-sensitives of all time; I don't generally characterize Sith Lords as having great scientific curiosity or a sense of wonder for the universe (or bothering to remember "little" people exist most of the time), because their whole deal kind of precludes that, but it seems reasonable that one might conclude that there's potential power in investigating this.
If Anakin was friendly with Palpatine for the latter half of his childhood, it seems like it could have been relatively easy for Palpatine to learn things like 1) Anakin's midichlorian count (which he can use to tell Anakin that everyone else is just jealous of his power) and 2) Shmi's situation on Tatooine (which he can use to foster resentment between Anakin and the Jedi Order for not helping Shmi too). Just get Anakin a little frustrated and he'll probably start talking! Palpatine could make some concerned offer to send someone to check on Anakin's mother - it is the least that Naboo can do for the family that helped to save them, the Chancellor might say, but he would prefer that such favoritism remain a secret between them - and then Sidious would have Watto's exact address no problem.
And it's not like it would be hard to kidnap Shmi. Palpatine (as Sidious?) could pick some random bounty hunter and order them to go buy her, because this amount of money is presumably pocket change to him, and if Watto resists selling her off to a stranger, the bounty hunter can claim that they've come on behalf of her son. And if that doesn't work or if Shmi is already with the Lars family, there's always violence. Palpatine can just lie to Anakin and say that his agent discovered Shmi was targeted by enemies of the Jedi Order. Oh, what a shame they didn't protect her!
I don't know what would happen from here. Sidious could potentially contract the Kaminoans as a private, anonymous citizen to research Shmi and see if she'll be useful to him at all; the Kaminoans seem to be in the business of designer babies for specific clients (Jango + my vague memories of some "Clone Wars" comic). Which means that Shmi could be unhappily, awkwardly hanging around Kamino, probably still enslaved, when Jango Fett and the clones business is going on. For years, potentially.
Ideally for the Sith, the Kaminoans would be keeping Shmi in an entirely separate facility most of the time, away from the army intended for the Jedi and the Republic. But Jango might be sent around the planet on errands or something and the Kaminoans might need to use very specific equipment at some points, and I am a fan of grand plans being ruined by chance encounters or workplace logistics, so I think it would be fun if Shmi met Jango or Boba. Maybe Palpatine assumed that the Kaminoans had already disposed of Shmi or were keeping her on ice, due to a badly worded email or something else mundane, because the Kaminoan forgot the right Basic word (it's not their first language!!! or a translator malfunctioned or something) during their space phone call.
There's lots of Canon Divergence directions for this, like more serious angst or drama or thriller horror being imprisoned by a Sith Lord (somewhere besides Kamino) or discovering what's being done to the clones. Shmi could end up being rescued by Jedi and helping uncover Sidious. Or she could have a different tragic ending.
(This whole post regarding Shmi and cloning is partially inspired by that one post pointing out that Rey looks a lot like Shmi, and given the strange circumstances of Anakin's birth, any attempt to clone Anakin might have created a clone of Shmi instead. I still think a "Rey as Anakin's clone" is a fun sequel trilogy AU.)
I'm leaning towards fix-it and comedies of errors ideas because the prequels are tragic enough for me. Currently, I'm thinking about Shmi eventually ending up as part of young Boba Fett's gang somehow, because it's amusing to me that he was somehow a recurring antagonistic figure on that TCW show despite being a child. The other bounty hunters are like, "Kid, did you... bring your mom on this mission...?" And Boba Fett is like, "No!!! She's my ship mechanic!!! But if you touch her, just so you know, I will fucking kill you."
I think that both Anakin and Boba would fucking hate being adoptive brothers in any way, shape, or form. And the idea of Luke and Leia someday having an "Uncle Boba Fett" is also very funny to me.
(EDIT: I'm currently dubious regarding a Jango/Shmi ship because Jango does participate in the creation and enslavement of the clone army. Like, it's the Kaminoans who do it, they hold most of the blame and they would have gotten someone else if Jango hadn't done it, but Jango is very much there and at the very least complicit in a horrifying series of crimes against millions of people. Depending on how you characterize Shmi Skywalker, an enslaved woman, I don't really think she'd be cool with that. She let her child go off to become a Jedi because she thought it would be a much better life for him, while Jango sold his own "children" off into war for money. So, I'm currently thinking that Shmi might like the innocent child Boba, but she might honestly dislike Jango quite a lot.)
#I can't resist a “the dead mom lives” fanfic premise#tossawary star wars#fic ideas#shmi skywalker#boba fett
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Revenge Body
The day he dumped my sister...
This is a photo of Eric the day he dumped my sister. According to him, she wasn't good enough to be with a hotshot architect like him! Eric thinks highly of his career and appearance, and he loves himself more than he could love any woman.
My sister had to find that out the hard way.
What Eric doesn't know is that his ex-girlfriend comes from a family of witches. In fact, her speciality is contacting the dead, and that's exactly what she did...
My sister summoned me, her dear-old brother, from beyond the grave and spilled the tea on her ex-boyfriend. Even though I was dead, I was furious with the man, so I agreed to help with my sister's revenge scheme. It might've been petty and unethical, but I was in! Eric needed to lose what he loved most...
2 months later...
"He's fattening right up!" I sent a selfie to my sister, cradling the bloated gut that hung from my chest.
That's right. I jumped into Eric's body and possessed his ass! In only a short time, I'd completely transformed the jerk's entire existence. I was dragging his perfect body and career down the drain!
After performing Eric's dramatic emotional breakdown at his architectural firm, I got fired and kicked out of the building. I strutted his body back to his place, and quickly sold everything he owned. I got rid of his fancy clothes, his shiny sports car, and his luxury apartment. All the money went directly to my sister. I used what was left to rent out the crappiest little apartment I could find.
It was in that seedy rat-infested motel that I gleefully began to destroy Eric's carefully maintained body. I packed his tight stomach full of beer and fast food, shaved his perfect head of hair, and donned an unwashed outfit I thrifted from a GoodWill.
Now that he was unemployed, I got him a job with a construction company. I made sure to get started with the same crew that Eric used to supervise as the architect. Needless to say, there were a lot of angry tradesmen who weren't happy to see him...
6 Months Later...
Apparently, construction workers really don't like architects, so they were all constantly badmouthing Eric behind my back. I didn't really stop them, but I also didn't really keep them from doing it to my face either. With me in control, Eric was just a pathetic, submissive loser, and all his new coworkers knew they could push him around.
I didn't wash Eric once while wearing him. My nose eventually became numb to his ripe body odor, but I noticed the disgusted looks on everyone's face when they were near. His skin was constantly itchy with dry sweat and dirt too, but I didn't bother buying him anything else to wear. As far as I was concerned, Eric would get up, work, and sleep in the same repurposed clothes I bought for a few bucks.
By this point, the lean muscles he'd been so proud of were long gone. A heavy layer of blubber hung off his whole body, and he was practically unrecognizable with his shaved head and unkept beard. Giving his heavy beergut a jolly shake, I chuckled and knew it was finally time to move to the final phase...
Present Day...
It was mid-afternoon when I jumped ship. I abandoned his body after a long morning of heavy lifting, leaving Eric exhausted, sweaty, and caked in mud.
Eric regained control of his senses for the first time after 6 months of being possessed by me. He stood there for a moment, all 280 lbs of him, simply staring at his surroundings in disbelief and confusion.
He didn't start yelling until he looked down and saw the state of his precious body. I doubt he had ever felt so slimy and gross before. As I said, I made sure to leave his body as disgusting as possible for him.
Don't feel bad for him though. My sister and I just made Eric as disgusting on the outside as he was on the inside...
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This weekend I sifted through hundreds of screenshots for the OJ fandom bullying report. Made a ton of progress on it, and I hope to release it soon, so that everyone can see the evidence I discuss here! 🫂❤️
One thing I noticed was that a common theme of how fandom bullies justify their hate/cyberbullying is claiming the Throzzy ship, the way I and other contemporary artists draw it (or inherently), is “unhealthy.”
This is fucked up for 2 reasons:
1- This ship isn’t canon. Thus EVERYTHING about the ship is determined by the artists. No 2 artists are the same, thus no 2 depictions of the ship are the same. There is no common “throzzy” ship- everyone has a unique take on it. Without even bothering to read/investigate the source material of each artist’s unique depiction of the ship, the bullies just flat out lie about the content, and project onto the entire ship ideas they got from creators from 10+ years ago that aren’t even active. You’ll see so many of them have “Throzzy DNI” in their bios as if we’re some kind of cohesive political party or some shit LMFAO.
2- Telling women and queers what’s “healthy” for them is wrong and controlling. So many of us are fighting against misogyny/queerphobia in our irl relationships that’s been normalized as “healthy.” Nobody else can tell you what’s healthy- only YOU can decide that.
How I depict Throzzy is literally what I WANT in a relationship- loving your partner for the ways they’re different, healing eachother from trauma, and having loads of nasty kinky sex.
NOBODY can know what’s healthy for you in a relationship more than you do. We’re adults, we decide it for ourselves. And it is ESPECIALLY ridiculous when it’s a fictional ship of two microbes LMFAO.
There is NO one right way to love someone- and anyone that claims YOUR ship is unhealthy needs to stop telling other adults what they should desire and how they should live their lives. Doing so is simply the newest way men/misogynists exert heteronormative forms of control over women and queers.
Queer minorities who enjoy kinks exist. Consensual and healthy age gap relationships between adults exist. Kink shaming + hating on diverse REAL relationships we project onto fictional ones, just because they don’t fit your narrow minded view of what YOU want, is frankly bullshit + sexist.
Women and queers don’t need you to tell us what WE want is wrong. We’ve taken that bullshit from men all our lives. We decide for OURSELVES.
You have a problem with it? That’s fine. Just shut the fuck up and focus on your own relationship, or lack thereof, instead of calling us groomers/pedos/racists/whatever label suits your fancy (or falsified screenshots) because you’re mad that we’re fucking confident, happy, and FLOURISHING doing something you don’t like.
And to my fellow Throzzy artists, NSFW artists, or frankly any artist from any ship that antis get a hardon from targeting- KEEP DOING YOUR THING! This fandom belongs to YOU just as much as anyone else. Your artwork belongs to YOU. Your blog, page, profile is YOURS and no one else’s.
Making art is the greatest form of self love- and no one else can tell you how to love yourself. KEEP MAKING ART!!! ❤️❤️❤️
#osmosis jones#throzzy#we want osmosis#ozzy x thrax#drozzy#lozzy#throzzix#fandom#osmosis jones fanfiction#artists on tumblr#ozzy and drix
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Bi-Han doesn't hate Tomas
I've talked about the relationship between these two in other posts of mine before, but I think a proper analysis of it is long overdue, especially with the ridiculous misconceptions still going around in the fandom.
Of course, someone had to comment this on my post about Bi-Han being a good brother.
Please, allow me to prove you wrong.
Bi-Han respects Tomas. Proof? He selected Tomas for an incredibly important mission, one where the stakes couldn't possibly be any higher, and assigned him the task of preventing the activation of the soul stealers. He trusted Tomas to be capable of doing that all by himself. He let Tomas join Kuai Liang and him for the mission when he could have picked any other Lin Kuei instead. He could have chosen Cyrax or Sektor, his two most loyal Lin Kuei, but no, he specifically chose Tomas. Because he knows Tomas is a capable fighter and because Tomas is his brother.
Need more proof? For most of the story mode, Bi-Han is the ONLY ONE talking to Tomas and addressing him directly, while Liu Kang, Kuai Liang and everyone else treat Tomas as if he's invisible. They don't acknowledge his presence and don't speak to him until after Bi-Han joins Shang Tsung. When Bi-Han snaps at Tomas, Kuai Liang doesn't even bother defending him. He only shows that he "cares" once he needs Tomas on his side.
I've elaborated on this in detail in another post, so I won't repeat it all here, but when Bi-Han scolds Tomas, he's only doing so out of frustration because both his brothers keep comparing him to their father and refuse to acknowledge his authority. Bi-Han can't even utter one word of complaint without these two immediately bringing up the old grandmaster. He was furious and Tomas looks shocked and confused at Bi-Han's outburst. What that tells us is that he did not expect Bi-Han to talk to him like that because he never saw his brother act like this before. It proves that Bi-Han didn't put Tomas down on the regular like people always claim. The fandom reads too much into that one short scene and they don't even take the characters' body language or any other subtext into account.
When Tomas asks Bi-Han if they will always be enemies, Bi-Han tells him they will be enemies unless he submits. He doesn't seem opposed to accepting Tomas back into the Lin Kuei or to at least have a truce between them.
Tomas used to admire Bi-Han. He wouldn't have idolized or admired a person who mistreated him. When Tomas poses as the "leader" of the Lin Kuei during the tea house fight, he adopts Bi-Han's body language and expressions. That is how much Tomas looked up to Bi-Han.
Again, I mentioned this before, but Tomas was Bi-Han's second in command in the Sub-Zero invasions mode timeline. While there's no actual evidence for it, I've also had the theory that Tomas might be Bi-Han's second in command in the main timeline too, should the ribbons they both wear around their bicep indicate rank. If the most ruthless and actually evil version of Bi-Han, dark!Titan Sub-Zero who destroyed entire timelines because their inhabitants were not Lin Kuei, regarded Tomas, whose blood is not Lin Kuei, so highly, what makes people think the main timeline's Bi-Han doesn't respect him just as much?
And to answer the final question, no, there were not "multiple intros" saying that, there was just one and yes, Bi-Han was cold towards Tomas because his blood is not Lin Kuei and that's perfectly reasonable if you actually consider the context. The Lin Kuei live secluded and isolated from the rest of the world. Their existence is supposed to be a secret. Of course, they would be wary of any outsiders. Judging by how easily Tomas left the Lin Kuei, I doubt that he had any other friends within the clan aside from his brothers. They were probably all hesitant to trust him, including Bi-Han, whose duty it is to protect his clan. Tomas's family was murdererd by Lin Kuei warriors. Naturally, Bi-Han would be suspicious of his true intentions and worry that he could try to seek vengeance for their deaths one day. It doesn't mean that Bi-Han hated Tomas or didn't consider him a brother.
Whenever Tomas refers to Bi-Han's and Kuai Liang's parents as his parents, Bi-Han does not comment on it or correct him. He doesn't disagree or tells Tomas that they are not his parents. Tomas is a brother to Bi-Han or at the very least, he used to be before their falling out. Bi-Han never calls Tomas adopted, he only tells him that he is not Lin Kuei. Bi-Han was also worried about Tomas when he fell after Nitara attacked him. And again, no, he did NOT kick the rock to try and kill Tomas and here's the proof.
( @trixievrbada tagging you because I know you'll want to read this )
#bi han#bi-han#mk sub zero#bi han sub zero#mk bi han#tomas vrbada#mk smoke#mortal kombat 1#mk1 2023#mk1
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Apologies if this has been asked already, but is there any chance we might get to see what those conversations between sun and moon were like? I just started reading (Don't) Fear the Reaper and now that I know they talk when Sun is quiet, I can't help but wonder what's being said.
When I eventually get around to writing the follow-up fic (which will explore the story from Sun's pov) you'll get to see each and every conversation they had!
Since I'm not sure when that will be (and I have a rough version of what it might look like already written up in my notes) I'll go ahead and drop it here for you to chew on in the meantime :3
This conversation occurs in their personal cabin when y/n first finds out about Moon's existence. I've left the original lines in for context, but they'll be indented so you know what is and isn't internal.
“We?” You watch with growing curiosity as he freezes in place and winces, like he’s just been caught in a lie.
“Sun—”
“I know, I know.”
“Fix it.”
There it is, again. That distant expression like his mind is somewhere else entirely. You aren’t sure if robots are capable of internal monologue, but if they are, his must be pretty intense for the absolutely guilty expression he wears before smothering it with another mocked up smile. “Me and…Moon,” he answers, voice pitifully small.
“What are you doing?”
“It’s better to be honest, isn’t it? They’re going to find out eventually.”
“No. No. You’re going to say something you shouldn’t.”
“I can handle myself in a conversation just fine, thank you very much. I have so fa—”
“You don’t know when to shut up.”
His smile falters, eyes panicked like a child being scolded.
Moon. You recognize the name from the conversation with Oscar earlier, how scared he had looked from the mere mention of it. You aren’t entirely sure how to navigate this situation, but if this Moon has everyone up in arms, there must be a good reason for it, right? “Is he…dangerous?”
“....Well? Am I?”
“Oh, now you want me to talk?”
“Just thought they should know all the grisly details, since you seem keen on being truthful.”
Sun hesitates to answer. He bides his time by tending to your ankle, instead. Carefully drawing your shoe away like a reverse cinderella, then gently turning your ankle in all directions to get a feel for the damage.
“You’re not being fair.”
“Go on, tell them.”
“I don’t think that’s a good ide—”
“Tell them how I butchered her. How I didn’t stop until her pulse flickered under my hand.”
“Moon—”
“Tell them how much I regret letting go.”
“I—”
“Tell them how often we think about her blood caking our palms. How relieving it felt to finally—”
“It doesn’t feel broken,” he tells you.
“Don’t ignore me.”
“I think you might have just twisted it. Should be in tip-top shape by morning!” He faces you with that telltale smile once more, only for it to droop significantly when you don’t immediately mirror his relief. It’s not the answer you’re waiting for.
“Hypocrite.” Moon snarls. “Cornered yourself. Now you’re the animal stuck in a trap.”
“Little rabbit…” he sighs. “You are very, very lucky, you know. This could have been much worse.”
Pebbles climb in your throat, brought on by his words. Each bigger than the last and taking up space where you need to breathe. They rattle with every inhale, collecting in great heaps the longer he fits you with that emotionless stare. You don’t think he’s referring to your ankle, anymore.
“Cruel. Warning a rabbit with one foot already in a trap.”
“They’re smarter than you think.”
“It’s too late to save them.”
“...I know.”
“Then why bother?”
A twig snaps just outside the door, relieving you of his piercing gaze as his neck wrenches to follow it. Just a squirrel. “Sun, I—” “Anyone can be dangerous,” he whispers, eyes still zeroed in on the animal.
“Caaareful.”
“I told you, it’s better to be honest," Sun's optics twitch ever briefly. "They ought to know it isn’t you they should fear.”
#DFtR au#DFtR au spoilers#snippets#decided to drop it through text instead of screenshots due to the length#again this is a VERY rough concept of how it might go. all of this is subject to change once i get to the final draft
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Sunsets.
They were always better when you watched them with someone else.
You glanced down at the hands in your lap: yours and Sam's, twined together like your lives have been for the past 5 years. The best of friends from the moment her family moved into town. You couldn't remember a time when you existed without her.
She's chatting now, telling some story about her boyfriend's dunce behavior to cheer you up after Mark broke your heart. Douchebag. You don't really know how you got here of all places; how things seemed to go so right with him and then so terribly wrong.
Sam made a joke at both Patrick and Mark's expense. You laughed and the sound of it was unfamiliar and almost roared in your ear, like a hundred people were laughing.
Everyone always laughed at Sam's jokes. Everyone loved Sam. Everything always worked out for her, even in the most unlikely situations. She was just lucky like that.
You told her once, after she won the talent show at school, that it almost seemed like she was the star of The Samantha Show or something. She found it hilarious, apparently, but you had an inkling that her feelings were still hurt. This was real life, not TV. She didn't just win because she was some main character, she worked really hard on her dance routine.
You felt a little bad after that, never brought it up again. The dark little voice deep down inside you smothered for now.
Because yeah, she did work hard. You knew that. She was smart and talented and funny and caring and a great friend and neighbor and that's just how it was because...
Because...
Because she strived to be all of those thing.
Things you…really didn’t bother with.
Because you were…
You.
Average, squeaking by a three-point-something GPA, wannabe artist who could barely draw, never left town before even when there was that field trip to DC because you got the mumps. A little nervous, a little clumsy, a little romantic with your head in the clouds. You always had a crush but nothing ever really came of those crushes until Mark.
The only boy to ever like you back and then he broke your heart.
“I just want to disappear,” you muttered pathetically and let go of Sam’s hand to cover your eyes again.
"So do it!" Sam finally hopped to her feet in the way that only she could, raring for another passioned, motivational speech that she was known for. You really needed one of those and also loathed that she was about to give you one. "Disappear! Leave!”
This was not the speech you expected.
"Uh, what?" you let out a mixture of a scoff and a laugh, tears forgotten for now. "What do you mean leave? Hello, graduation in a few months. Prom? Then college. What happened to your big plan last week? One last summer in Port Geneva?"
"Forget one last summer," she waved her arms wildly. "This is your life! You're my best friend, I want you happy. Tell me the truth. Do you really even want to go to college? Wouldn't you rather pack up big blue and go on that adventure like you talked about in 8th grade?"
At your blank stare, Sam grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you.
"That's the whole reason we're friends in the first place don't you remember? The ice breaker?! Are you kidding?"
"I don't have a clue," you giggled as she jostled you around.
"Our entire friendship built on a lie. UGH. Ok. Mrs. Mills what-do-you-wanna-do-in-10-years activity? And everyone's was stupid. Tina wanted to be on the cover of Tiger Beat for the Girl Superstar issue. Patrick...gotta love him...but he wanted to be the starting quarterback for the Miami Dolphins. Mine was so dumb I don't even want to say it, great first impressions I made as the new kid.
"But you wanted to see the world! Pack your bags and board a train around the US. Paint the sunset at the Grand Canyon. See glaciers in Alaska! Hell, you even said you'd travel to Middle Earth if you could. And I thought you meant the equator!"
You both laughed and as she went on and on about things you apparently said 4 years ago and as the memory came back to you, your heart ached.
Yeah, you did say that stuff didn't you? You’d been such a silly, idealistic kid before you grew up and reality hit you time and time again.
"That was just kids stuff Sammie," you laughed dismissively. "I'm...I'm gonna take classes at State, and I'm gonna work at the furniture store and I'm gonna..."
"You're gonna pine over Mark Greckman over the rest of your life?" The hands were on her hips again. "No, ma'am, you...you're gonna go on your adventure and...oh my...you're gonna find a prince of some European kingdom or...or a handsome stranger in an Italian villa. Or both. Hoards of men fighting for your affection."
"Please stop," you stood up and grabbed her as she started waving her arms around and pantomiming kissing a tall stranger. "Stop it."
"Ok I'm done, I'm done," she promised. "I just don't want you to be crying over that idiot anymore. And we might be close to graduation but...I don't know...you can still change your mind."
"Hmm," you shrugged. "I dunno. If just sounds so…”
“Unlike you?”
“Yeah.”
"Just think about it," she urged you. "You and your Volkswagen Beetle…and the world...the whole universe if you want it! The possibilities are endless. I just feel like...1985...it's gonna be your year."
There was a spark of inspiration that grew inside of you, and in your heart, you knew she was right.
You pulled her into your arms, grateful to have your best friend.
"Port Geneva was filmed in front of a live studio audience."
Eddie hit the rewind button on the remote and watched the scene speed in reverse until it hit Sam’s big speech. He hit play and watched for a minute then paused, the blurry image of your giggling face frozen on his screen for the foreseeable future.
He sighed and leaned back on the couch to enjoy your company for a minute.
The living room was dark, only illuminated by the glow of the TV and the street lights outside shining through the windows. There was a stack of tapes on the coffee table, along with his abandoned homework. The pizza he ordered would be here soon but for now…it was just you and him.
“M’sorry Mark was an asshole,” he said aloud into the still room. “To be honest…I kind of warned you about him way back.”
You don’t say anything. You never do.
“I know, the heart wants what it wants.” He picked a piece of lint off of his jeans. “I just want to look out for you honey.”
You stay smiling on the screen, and he can imagine it got the slightest bit bigger when he said that.
“I know you try to look after me too. Guess that doesn’t stop either of us getting hurt right?” He chuckled and pat his hands on his lap.
This was pathetic, talking to a fictional character like they were really in the room with him.
You were just…you were everything. And you’d been there for him, a balm to his woes. You had been since he started watching Port Geneva way back when, but especially since everything went down last year.
With his dad and the house and…
There was a knock at the door and Eddie hit the eject button so he could put in the next tape in watch with dinner. It was gonna be a good episode, you tell Mark off and even punch him; he remembered it fondly.
Defending yourself. He was proud of his girl.
Eddie ate his dinner and watched his episodes, taped from when they originally aired. Wednesday nights at 9pm, right before the news. He did his homework and occasionally repeated the rewind-pause-play act that he had perfected over the years so he could make another joke or, just once, complain about his chemistry homework.
Life was hard. For everyone. But especially if your name was Eddie Munson. Still, he endured. He’d never been a stranger to fantasy and escapism, he had his books and his game and his movies but there was something so…comforting in the realism that was your show.
A small suburban town full of normals. All sorts of mundane activities that mostly everyone made feel were…life altering events. And a handful of misunderstood outcasts—like you and Scott and Bonnie—who played supporting characters to the stars. Stars that were, quite frankly, unrealistic and annoying.
Eddie felt that way sometimes though, like he was just some background character waiting for his chance at the spotlight. Who had been the main character in his story, huh? Ronnie? Yeah…he could see that, now that she was on her great college adventure.
But with her gone, what would come of his storyline? Did he just fade into the background again?
Eddie ejected the tape before the current episode finished and propped his feet on the coffee table as he flipped the channels to something else. He needed to focus on something else. He would come back to his tapes, to you, another night and he would wish that you were real once again. Knocking on his door, taking him on a grand adventure with you.
But for now he just needed to stew in his…sad secondary character thoughts.
You got your time in the spotlight, a 2-episode arc at the end of the season, and as much as he hoped that it would be his turn soon…to be the character everyone loved…the person everyone loved…he knew it might never happen for him.
Eddie the Freak. Eddie the outcast. Eddie the idiot.
He would even take a single scene dedicated to him at this point.
Was that too much to ask?
Coming in 2024.
Find the Masterlist here. And the original blurb here.
#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fluff#Eddie Munson angst#stranger than (fan)fiction#eddie munson#Stranger things fic
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Just read the second Wild Robot book (VERY big spoilers for The Wild Robot Escapes)
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Alright I finished The Wild Robot Escapes and… what? What was that?! The ending floored me, and not in the good way. And everyone else seems to love it. Am I crazy? I’m organizing my thoughts here because I’m honestly quite upset. Spoilers ahead, naturally.
So the story reaches climax when Roz is cornered by a group of RECOs, who are hunting her after she escaped the farm she belonged to. Robots are slaves in this world, this is the status quo. She is shot, and wakes up in front of the woman who is revealed to be in charge of creating the robots, Dr. Molovo.
They have a chat about purpose, the nature of consciousness, love, personhood, etc. Roz asks if there are any robots like her, to which Molovo replied they’d all be killed by now, and Roz seemed satisfied with this answer.
Molovo is convinced and agrees to free Roz from her shackles, but not before melting down her body to prove to the humans (and to any robots watching) that the rogue robot has been killed. She then bestows upon her a brand new body, free of her serial number and model name, granting her proof of her autonomy.
Roz and Brightbill stay with Molovo for a while, and Roz decides to view Molovo as her mother, developing a familial relationship with her. When Molovo flies Roz back to her island, they have a teary goodbye, and confirm they love each other.
Now, for my thoughts. I don’t think you’re supposed to think too hard about this ending, and I don’t think the author did, but I had this sinking feeling as I finished up this novel. At first I thought it was meant to be bittersweet, like the first, but it kept bothering me. So I dug a little deeper and realized the implications that were bothering me so much.
Roz ends this story loving Molovo, in her eyes the best human she’s met on her journey. Molovo, who is the human responsible for creating her kind to be enslaved in the first place.
I’d be fine with this if either: a. Roz was just going along with Molovo so that she could escape and survive, and never really agreed with her views, or b. Molovo changed her ways upon meeting Roz and stopped with the robot enslavement. But no, Roz becomes family with her oppressor. She agrees with her viewpoint. She believes other robots are deserving of being enslaved, because she’s “special.”
Now, I don’t need Roz to change the world. She’s just one member of a marginalized group, who’s struggling to survive as it is. But to side with the human most responsible for perpetuating robot oppression in the end? It’s too much for me to bear. Not my Roz.
Not to mention that Molovo faked Roz’s death and published the video out to everyone. Her explanation is that she wants to do this to assuage the humans’ fears of a, ahem, Wild Robot on the loose. And she does do this. By sending the message to everyone, human and robot, that dissident robots will be executed. She has made Roz an accessory to the oppression of her own kind.
The argument for Roz deserving freedoms that other robots do not is that she is “special.” I.e. there is no other robot in existence that has gained or could gain the same level of sentience that she has. Not only do I disagree with this idea, I think if it was actually true, we’d have a worse story.
Roz’s entire arc in the first book was learning to be wild, to survive and thrive in the wilderness. She did this because her programming prompted her to prioritize her survival and being good to others. The idea that she was somehow more fated to develop a sense of self than the other robots not only feels disrespectful to the others, but also takes away her agency. By claiming she was born differently, in a way that made her somehow better than the other robots, you cheapen all the hard work she put into becoming a better person despite being built to serve. She is special, not because of what she was originally, but because of what she became. Or at least, I thought she was. Now I’m not so sure.
I also don’t think the text really supports this interpretation either. Roz was able to hide her identity in order to fit in as a “normal” robot, you’re telling me that nobody else out there did the same for their survival? No other robot is feigning soullessness so as to not be killed? They’re programmed to do anything they can to stay alive, just like we humans are.
I think it’s incredibly unlikely that the only robot who had the ability to self realize was the one who needed it most to survive. I think there’s more support for the idea that most robots have the capability to learn and grow, just as Roz did. Hell, mass produced computers in real life all have the same starting point, after all. It’s just that most of them were not put in the same situation where they had to change themselves in order to fit in like she had. Most, but not all, as I’m sure with this capability, some of them are just going about their work and pretending to be “normal,” just as Roz did while on the farm.
Interestingly, while the original books leave the question up in the air about Roz being truly special, the 2024 movie actually answers this question outright. The movie added Vontra. Yes, she is awful and a foil to Roz in almost every way, but you can’t argue that she lacks sentience. A “normal” robot would not need to physically dominate someone else in order to feel power over them, and they wouldn’t become so upset when their target tried to escape. Vontra treated Roz horribly, but in doing so, proved that she too had whatever mental difference that made Roz so special.
I didn’t like Vontra’s addition in the movie at first, I thought she was unnecessary and, well, she reminded me a little too much of the abusers I’ve come across in my own life. But after reading the second book, her inclusion gives me hope. By including her, the second movie can’t argue that Roz is unique in her experience, because we’re shown that is simply not the case. I really hope the ending to the second movie sees some serious differences to the second book.
In my shock after reading that ending, I absentmindedly flipped through the last few pages, all the extra content that came with the book. And then I saw reading questions, for the kids who read this book in class. I can see people arguing that “it’s not that deep” and “it’s just a kids book,” but I think the fact that it’s for children just makes the ending more disturbing to me. If I had read this as a child, I would have cried, and I just wouldn’t have the words to explain what I felt was wrong. But now, I do. This ending shows that the only members of an oppressed group that deserve rights are the ones that the oppressors deem “special.” The “good ones.” And that all the ones who don’t fit so nicely into that subjective category should be stripped of their personhood and enslaved. Not a good look.
I know flawed characters exist. But I don’t think Roz was meant to be morally gray. This ending was written in a way that felt more like we were expected to feel happy for Roz for making her way home, despite the fact that she blinded herself to the injustices faced by her kind back in human society. We don’t even get an inkling that she realizes something is wrong. The only part of it that we’re supposed to be sad about is that she could never see Molovo again. And yet, that’s the only part that didn’t upset me. Good riddance!
All in all, before I read this I was so invested in Roz. I’m autistic (yes, I know, you can tell), so I hold certain interests very dear to my heart, and The Wild Robot was one of them. Roz was my everything! To me, this ending felt like a betrayal from someone I love.
If you agree or disagree with this take I want to hear your thoughts! Hey, maybe some of you can make me feel better about all this.
TL;DR: Roz kind of ends the second book as an apologist for the slavery of her own kind, and is not challenged by the author in this notion. I am heartbroken.
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my problems with discovery's spore drive have nothing to do with the wacky mushroom science. Like this is Star Trek™ not some bonefide diamond on the Moh's Scale of Sci-Fi hardness like The Martian. I know to expect the writers playing a bit fast and loose with physics and how the real world works. I'm here for that wackniess, actually. Love me some technobabble about mycelial spores or tetryon particles or whatever! the thing that doesn't work for me is the way the spore drive acts narratively, and how the technology was introduced within the timeline of the series. Like it's just obvious that the writers aren't willing to let anyone else but Discovery have access to the spore drive. They twisted up the Glenn in season one, so Discovery is the only ship with a spore drive. They hemmed and hawed about genetic modification in season 2 so no one else got a spore drive. They purged records of the spore drive's existence from history and claimed that no one else had tried to make anything like it in 900 years despite a massive dilithium shortage and canonical search for other methods of propulsion in season 3. And then at the very end, just when you think, oh hey maybe the entire population of Kwejian will make for a nice crop of new spore drive pilots, the writers fucking blow up their whole planet just so they don't have to let anyone else have the spore drive. And to be fair, they can't really let anyone else have it, or else Discovery loses it's right to be "the only one we can turn to in a crisis". And that's really all it has going for it. So, I get it! Still hate it, though. And, even moreso than all the silly narrative contrivances that are used to nerf transporter technology so that the plot can still happen, this bothers me. Because sure, all the ion storms and interference can get a bit stupid. We all make fun of star trek for inventing a technology that could immediately yoink our blorbos away from their problems, only to turn around and force it to not work when it's needed most. But at least there isn't just one ship that has the ability to use the transporter at all. That would be ridiculous. Everyone would want their own transporter. And yet, that's the situation we have in Discovery. Only one ship can travel across the galaxy in the blink of an eye. The show writers keep contriving to keep it that way. And given how useful instantaneous travel is, the fact that it hasn't been replicated once, by any species in the galaxy, not just the Federation, in 900 years is just stretching the limits of my willing suspension of disbelief.
#sporkandpringles original#gripes#star trek discovery#the spore drive#I think it's a cool concept#but the timing is weird#and even if we say 'oh the Federation didn't use it for moral reasons' like...#...do you think that would stop the Orions? the Romulans? literally anyone else who isn't the Federation?#I don't think so#'oh it was top secret'#so is no one studying the mycelial network?#are there no other mushroom scientists? stamets is the only one?#we know that's not true another one was on the Glenn#if different societies are expected to independently invent warp drive then why not also the spore drive?
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Definitely, Jim and Pam
Summary: Part two of this thing is feeling like Jim and Pam
A/N: It took a long time to finish, but it's finally here. Thanks to all the peole who kept asking about this part two. And sorry for the waiting. This is about 10k+ words so, enjoy!
Remember this is inspired in Jim and Pam from The Office!
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Los Angeles was nice.
It's been a month since you started college and you could say you had blended in pretty well.
The classes were exhausting but everything else was new and exciting for you. You felt like it was your chance for a new beginning, and you definitely needed one.
After that terrible prom night you isolated yourself for two entire weeks. No social media, no calls, no messages, no visits. You only bothered to send your application letter for college.
When you finally decided to turn on your phone again you realized some of your friends tried to reach out to you. You answered every single message, letting everyone know that you were okay. But your heart broke a little when you realized that none of those messages or missed calls were from Wanda.
And that was your breaking point. You understood that you really screwed up things with her. She wasn't even concerned about your absence, if anything you thought she was relieved that you didn't tried to talk her anymore.
For the next months you avoided anything related to Wanda. Before blocking her number you sent her one last text apologizing and explaining your reasons to go zero contact with her.
You didn't expect her to answer anyway.
Although Pietro did call you to know about how you were doing, the moment he mentioned Wanda you stopped him right away.
"Please let's not talk about her, it still hurts too much". That's what you said.
He sighed but changed the subject immediately. That's when you found out he got into a foreign university in Switzerland and that he was moving out of the country.
You smiled happily and extended your congratulations to him.
Some time later you found yourself moving to Los Angeles and starting your first year of college.
Some of your friends ended up with you there, like Kate, Peter and MJ. It was awesome to have old friends with you, but meeting new people was also exciting.
You heard from a random conversation between MJ and Peter that Wanda and Vision ended up together in NYU.
Your felt your stomach flinch at the reminder of Vision stealing your college dream with Wanda. And you hated yourself for it. By that moment you should've been over Wanda, she didn't love you, there was no reason to grieve a love that never existed in the first place.
But you excused yourself to your friends and ran into the nearest bathroom to cry your heart out. You knew you shouldn't, but you couldn't help it.
After washing your face to prevent anyone to notice your were crying, you looked at yourself in the mirror. You couldn't keep going like that. You felt like you were a ghost: lifeless.
Wanda really hit different but you needed to change, to take control of your life again.
You knew what you needed to do.
You needed to move on from Wanda.
I know Pietro, she's great but, she's my best friend - Wanda said to her brother, tears dried all over her cheeks - I just never thought she would feel the same way. I didn't know what to say, I just wanted to run. Now I think it's all messed up, it's too late. There's nothing left to do. She probably hates me. But... I think I'm still in love with her.
Wanda had really screw things up with you.
She knew it.
She couldn't help it though, the moment you told her about your feelings she froze. She never expected that those words would ever came out from your mouth.
You loved her.
You really loved her.
How did she never notice it before?
And why did you never say anything?
She had so many questions running trough her mind.
It was prom night, she was about to leave with Vision, she wanted to stay a little longer but they were already late, you were there with Kate, she didn't even know you liked Kate, did you really like her? Why did you never mentioned it to her before? Why was she so mad when she found out?. You loved her. You loved her.
You loved her.
Maybe it was a joke.
She looked at you expecting for you to laugh and tell her it was all a joke.
But you didn't.
- Y/N... Why are you doing this? You know I... I can't, he's there and...
Vision and his parents were waiting for her. She just started walking as you kept apologizing. She felt numb through the rest of the night.
Her boyfriend and his family did the most of the talking during the dinner.
She couldn't focus on anything that wasn't you. She had just left you. Alone. You had poured you heart out for her and she left.
You probably were devastated.
But what was she supposed to do?
She really was clueless. Everything happened so fast. And for some reason she felt like she needed to stand up for Vision. But she probably got too defensive.
Oh god it was really a mess.
He was always right.
They used to have recurrent fights or disscusions because Vision felt like you liked Wanda more than just as a friend. But she always defend you from the accusations saying you were her best friend, nothing more. Maybe she tried so hard because she wanted to convince herself too.
That night she came home exhausted. She felt her body drained from any energy or motivation.
Her brother was still awake and when he heard she was back he walked to her room to ask about how her night went.
She tried to put on a brave face but the moment Pietro flashed her a warm smile she broke down in his arms crying.
She vent to her brother all night long, letting him know everything that had happened at prom with you.
He didn't seem too surprised when she mentioned your love for her. Instead he only hugged her harder.
Pietro had been there for his sister since forever, their twin bond was something sacred for them, they were each other's best friends and obviously, each other's best confident.
He could still remember when a little 10 year old Wanda confessed to him that she wanted to kiss you. Some kids at her school had have their first kiss at recess that day and Wanda wanted to have her first kiss. With you.
That conversation followed so many others about her little, pure and innocent attraction towards you.
As she grew older those confessions ceased but Pietro remained as the front row witness of your undeniable love for each other.
- What am I supposed to do Pietro? I'm just really confused.
The white-haired boy smiled kindly at her.
- What do you feel like doing? Wanda we both know very well that you used to have feelings for Y/N, let's not fool ourselves.
Her brother was right, Wanda was well aware of her old feelings for you. Although she had worked so hard to buried them in the deepest place of her heart and mind, she could still remember how it was.
Who could blame her? She thought that forget those feelings was the best decision in order to protect your friendship. She never expected that some day you would feel the same way.
But there she was. Crying in her prom dress, secured in the safety of her brother's embrace, regretting every single second of that night.
- I truly don't know what to do Pietro... I feel like such an idiot and a bad friend.
- No Wanda, you're a human, there isn't a correct way to react to this kind of situation, you act out of impulse and natural reaction, there's nothing wrong with that.
- But I feel so bad... Y/N didn't deserve that... What do I do Pietro? Tell me...
- No sestra - her brother told her with a soft voice - I know, guilt it's a tricky feeling, but you need to figure out how to solve this problem, you can take your time and think about it but in the end it's gonna be up to you... Not me, Vision or Y/N... It's your decision Wanda.
Pietro gently kissed her sister's forehead and walked back to his room.
Wanda barely slept that night, too busy thinking in every possibility.
The next morning she received a text from Vision asking how she was doing and letting her know that he was gonna post a picture of the both of them from last night. She quickly understood the not so discrete hint and also posted a picture. She didn't feel like writing any caption so she just limited herself to type a red heart emoji.
The days passed and she used any possible excuse to avoid seeing Vision. She felt so bad for him too, he was oblivious of the situation, it wasn't fair for him either that his girlfriend was having doubts about her love for him and their relationship. It wasn't fair for him that all Wanda could think about was you.
A week later she got a text message from you. The first text you had send her since prom.
She doubt about opening it or not. What if it was a letter telling her how much you hated her now, asking her to never come close to you again, that your friendship was over and from that moment on Wanda had no place in your life.
After twenty minutes of debating with herself she opened the text.
It wasn't what she expected.
The text was long, as she expected, but there wasn't any hate on it. It made her cry, the way you expressed yourself and the way you perfectly described your feelings. She felt terrible when you apologized for making her feel uncomfortable. You could never.
She would never let anyone know the content of the letter, it was something she decided to keep for herself. A secret between you and her for only your hearts to know, hence she never mentioned your text to anyone. Not even Pietro. The letter becoming the first secret between the Maximoff twins.
Wanda's life froze for days, she didn't isolate herself like you, she just felt dead-walking everywhere she went. She was physically there but her mind was somewhere else. She was thinking about you.
But your text was clear. You needed time and space away from her. It hurt like hell but she respected you decision. Even when she wasn't sure if she wanted for you to forget her.
She got accepted into NYU, just like Vision. Her family threw a party for her and for the very first time in years you weren't present in one of her celebrations. Not that Irina Maximoff didn't call you, but mostly because you politely declined her invitation making up some lame excuse, thanking her though.
Some time later she was packing her entire life in a set of gray suitcases, ready to take a flight to New York and start her new life at college with her boyfriend by her side. It sounded like a dream if you hear it that way.
But for Wanda everything was like a nightmare. NYU was her college dream just because she always thought you would be with her. She wasn't even sure of the path she was following, she didn't know if she really wanted to study there anymore.
Her relationship with Vision was fragile. Since prom night Wanda drastically changed her affection towards him. She didn't kiss him anymore, they only had been in a few two or three dates after and the PDA was completely gone.
Vision wasn't a stupid guy. He noticed this changes since the very first day, but decided to keep silence. For some reason he thought that Wanda would come around again once they were in college together.
But during the first weeks in NYU everything went downhill. They both had classes all day and different schedules, so they didn't had too much time left to spent together besides the weekends. But even those days Wanda always had an excuse to avoid any plan: homework, an exam to study for, books she had to read, etc.
Vision grew tired of it by the end of the fifth week, after Wanda had canceled him for the third time in a row. Not caring about the fact that the girl told him she needed to finish a report for one of her classes he walked straight to her dorm and knocked on her door.
- What are you doing here? Vision I told you...
- I know, I know what you said, but I'm tired of it - he interrupted her - Weeks Wanda, it's been weeks since the last time we had a date, weeks since the last time we spent time together, I don't know what's happening but I demand an explanation now...
Wanda stared at him.
- I don't know what are you talking about Vis, I have so many things to do and...
- No! - he interrupted again - This isn't something that started just now. I felt it since a long time ago - he paused for a few seconds, stepping in completely in the room closing the door for privacy - Something happened at prom night, something changed that night... I don't know what it is but... Just tell me what is happening to us...
Wanda, who was now sat at the edge of her bed looked at him with teary eyes. She knew this had to happen at some point.
- I'm just tired Vision, I'm exhausted... - she said with trembling voice and some tears already falling on her cheeks - I'm going through so many changes in my life right now, I had this huge fight with my best friend and now we're not even talking anymore... Now I'm here in New York and I'm not even happy about it, I don't like the way my life is going right now... I'm not sure if NYU is what I really want and I'm questioning every decision I've made since the moment I decided to leave my prom party to go with you and your parents for dinner...
Vision didn't know what to respond to that. When he walked to her dorm that night he wasn't expecting this outcome.
- You wanted to stay? - he asked cautiously.
Wanda nodded.
- Why didn't you say anything then? We could've done something...
- I just thought that if told you I would've dissapoint you and your family. You are my boyfriend Vision, sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the relationship... And at some point I felt like I needed to make you happy...
- But were you happy? In our relationship?
- In the beginning, yes, I was delighted with the idea of us, of you... You made me really happy Vision... But then we started having all this problems and I always felt like a was giving too much without getting anything back.
- And why did you never say anything? - he said exasperated.
Vision wasn't one of those boys who are bad boyfriends and are aware of it. He truly didn't saw any of this coming.
He listened to Wanda attentive, letting her express every single thing she had to say. And as the girl talked he realized how trash of a boyfriend he was. He was respectful and never treated her bad, but he took Wanda for granted, not being the same boyfriend she fell for at the beginning. He understood the girl's disappointment on him, and as much as he wanted there was no way to turn back time.
After forthy minutes of talking, he stood for up from his seat in her bed, hugged her one last time and started walking out of the room.
- I'm sorry I wasn't a better boyfriend, you deserve so much better, I'm sorry this didn't work out - those were his last words for her before closing the door.
Wanda remained in her place for some seconds before start crying. She called her brother, although she knew it was probably and odd time in Switzerland she didn't know what else to do or who else to call for comfort. Vision was her boyfriend after all, they had been together for almost three years and it was impossible for her not to feel a hole in her heart. That night she cried her heart out, and did not attend her classes the next day, too energy drained to take a step out of her room.
Eventually she got better. After three weeks she bounce back from the break up. Although she still had a lot of issues to deal with, she felt relieved. For some reason it felt like someone had taken away some of the weight on her shoulders. She felt lighter.
Los Angeles
You were doing a lot better. Two months after your last break down you were happier than in the earliest months of college.
You decided to focus your attention on anything else but Wanda. You started to study a lot harder, focusing more on your notes and classes, and also got yourself into a hobbie: tennis.
Kate was in the tennis team since the beginning of the year, and when you told her you were looking for extra curricular classes she suggested her club.
You used to occasionally visit her during her trainings, you already knew the coaches and the rest of the team, so you figured it wouldn't be so hard to fit in.
The coaches were happy to welcome you and a few days later after filling your proper application you were officially in. The only condition was to do some extra training for some weeks until you could keep up with the pace of some of the other new girls. You promised to train after hours until you were as good as them.
That's how you met Sharon Carter.
The first day you stayed after hours to train you noticed immediately a blond, beautiful girl who arrived at the practice court about ten minutes after the other girls left.
You didn't recognized her, she wasn't part of the team, or anyone you've seen before.
She was also surprised to see anyone staying later in the tennis court after the usual practice.
- Oh hey, hi - you said approaching to her with a kind smile.
- Hello, uhmm I'm Sharon, Sharon Carter...
- I'm Y/N, Y/N Y/LN, a pleasure... Are you new here?
She laughed a little, denying with her head.
- No, I don't study here, I'm coach Peggy's niece, she allows me to use the court sometimes after her team's practice.
- Ohh, well it's a pleasure... I'm new in the team and I need to practice more hours to keep up with the rest... So I guess you'll see me around here more often
She smiled kindly.
- That's great, it will be good to have some company.
You smiled kindly and nodded.
A month after your first encounter Sharon became one of closest friends. You two had so much in common, you liked the same kind of music and most of your favorite sitcoms were also her favorites, so naturally you spent a lot of time together, getting to know each other deeper.
She told you about her sabbatical year and how she was still thinking about what college she would go to.
Eventually you became a better tennis player, but even when the coaches told you there was no need for you keep staying after hours, you kept doing it to spend time with her. And she would visit your dorm on a daily bases after classes
When Peter, MJ and Kate got to know her they didn't hesitate to start to tease you, referring to Sharon from that moment on, as your girlfriend. You just smiled shyly denying whth your head. Of course, Sharon was beautiful, but you couldn't say you were something more than just good friends.
You wouldn't even thought of that possibility until some weeks later when she suddenly asked you out. It wasn't that explicit, but the invitation was kind of obvious.
- Do you want to do something tomorrow? Like go to see a movie or have dinner? - she asked you nervously one afternoon while you were doing homework at your dorm.
- Sure - you answered without thinking too much - Where do you wanna go?
She paused for a second and you looked at her intrigued.
- Sharon?
She looked back at you smiling shyly.
- Well, I was thinking on going to have dinner at a nice restaurant, you know I have a reservation and everything...
- Oh - you said surprised but smiling too - Like a date?
She nodded nervously.
- Yes... Like a date... Would you like to go in a date with me?
Long story short, that date was the first out of so many others that followed it right after. You had a great time with her, and the affection felt almost natural between you.
Sharon never mentioned and label for the two of you, she would only say you were dating. She probably didn't want to push you, and you were thankful for it.
But she did used to hold your hand, kiss you, take you out, wait for you after classes and open all the doors for you. And you of course, reciprocated every kind action to her. You two were basically a couple without the label.
The first vacation came sooner than you thought and you found yourself saying goodbye to Sharon with your luggage ready on your cab to take you to the airport.
- You know, you can visit me anytime - you said kissing her on the lips - If you need anything just call me okay?
She nodded and promised to visit you during your break, she would stay in Los Angeles for a while.
You knew it was a weird situation for you. Sharon was beautiful, kind, funny and you could definitely say you had feelings for her.
But deep down you knew Wanda was going to be back in town too, and you were well aware of the possibilities of you two finding each other at some places. It was impossible not to considering it was a three month break from college.
You felt you were doing a good job keeping her away from your mind. But you didn't know how it would affect your progress seeing her again. You weren't sure if she would speak to you, or if she would just pretend you didn't exist.
----------------
Being back at home was good. You had missed your parents more than you would admit, and you definitely missed your mom's meals, finally getting to eat homemade food for the first time in months.
Your first week back was calm. You stayed at home most of the time hanging wi your parents and called Shaeron every night before going to bed.
It was the very first day of your second week when everything took a turn. You were talking with your mom about college and your classes when she mentioned Wanda.
- She left college after her first three months, she's been home since then and looking for a new option.
You were surprised to hear the news. NYU was Wanda's dream since forever, and you couldn't understand why she would drop it.
- She didn't tell you? - your mom asked at your astonishment.
She never heard the story of why you and Wanda stopped talking. In fact, she didn't even know you two weren't friends anymore.
- No, we've been distant since prom, we had a fight and we just... We're not friends.
- Oh I'm sorry honey, but maybe you can talk it out with her and fix things up, you two have been best friends for so long... Don't let this ruin all those years of friendship...
You smiled sadly nodding your head, not wanting to keep discussing about it.
On wednesday you, Kate, MJ and Peter went to the theater to watch the new terror movie. They mentioned some of your old high school friends were tagging along but you never expected to see Wanda. Ever since she dated Vision she stopped going out with your group of friends.
But she was there. It felt like slow motion for you. You were already inside the the theater when she stepped in. She looked at you shyly while greeting all of your other friends, never breaking eye contact with you.
When she was in front of you she hugged you tightly.
- Hi Y/N
You reciprocated the affection dumbly.
- Hi Wanda
- How are you doing? - she asked.
- I'm good - you answered shortly, awkwardly smiling - How are you doing?... My mom told me about NYU... I'm sorry it didn't work out.
She sighed.
- Yeah well, I'm better now, I realized it wasn't what I needed or wanted and I just dropped it...
You nodded.
- I hope you find something soon, you're brilliant, any school will be lucky to have you.
She smiled.
-Thank you Y/N...
Peter said the movie was about to start and you two followed him inside.
Wanda sat two spots from you, Kate and MJ in the middle and Peter on your other side. Some of your other friends sat next to Peter.
The rest of the group probably didn't notice it, but there was a certain tension between you and Wanda through the whole movie.
She was nervous.
From the moment Kate told her you were gonna be there she imagined a thousand of different scenarios of how it would be like.
Just like you, she wasn't sure if you would speak to her. After your last message to her she didn't have any contact with you. Not even when she wanted to tell you about her situation with college.
She knew she hurt in the past, but she missed your friendship more than anything. Even though she had deeper feelings for you, she would be happy if you wanted to be her friend again.
You, on the other hand, were really confused about how you felt. You thought that you would feel anger the moment you saw her, but you just felt awkward around her. Even after she broke your heart in a thousand pieces you didn't feel mad. Maybe those months of healing really made progress in you.
When the movie finished everybody said goodbye and walked to their respective car. When you were about to leave you saw Wanda texting on her phone and walking to sit on a bench.
You wanted to just ignored her and go back home but you just couldn't. So, against any common sense you walked straight to her.
- Hey, are you going home now?
She looked at you a bit confused.
- Yeah, well I'm texting Pietro to see if he's on his way, he told me he would pick me up...
You nodded.
- Oh sure, I forgot Pietro was home too... How is he doing? - you asked.
- He's fine, he told me he's doing great at college and at the athlete team... Ohh and that he met a girl, I think her name is Monica... They've been dating for a while now..
You smiled.
- Wow, I would never imagined Pietro finally settling down... That's fantastic.
- I know, he's really happy.
There was a moment of silence interrupted by a ding on her phone.
- Dang it... - she said after reading the text.
- What's wrong?
- Pietro forgot to pick me up... He's leaving the house just now....
You looked at her texting. You knew you would probably regret your next comment but you couldn't just leave her there at a parking lot.
- Tell him not to worry, I'll take you home - you said.
She looked at you surprised.
- Really?
You smiled kindly.
- Yeah, just like the old times, let me drive you home Wanda.
She accepted and the two of you walked to your car.
You turned the music on and drove to her house. But even with the noise from the radio, it felt like there was a dead silence in the car.
After the first three minutes she finally got the courage to speak.
- So, are you doing well? How is it like living in Los Angeles?
- It's been great so far, college has been fun and I really like the city, it's amazing.
- That's great to hear Y/N, I'm really happy for you.
- Thanks.
Another moment of silence. You decided to be the one to speak this time.
- I know I said this before but I'm sorry about NYU, it must have been really difficult to take a decision like that...
Wanda sighed nodding.
- Yes, it was, but at the same time it was easy for me to understand that it wasn't something I liked, it just never felt right... The hardest part was telling my parents... That was scary.
- Yeah, I can imagine... But your parents love you, I bet they understood...
- Yes they did, although they asked me like a million times if I was sure... They even made me doubt sometimes...
You both laughed.
- Oh missed this - she said smiling.
Your laugh died and you swallowed nervously.
- What? - you asked.
She looked at you.
- Us. I miss you Y/N, so much... I miss our friendship.
You weren't expecting that answer. You didn't know what to say, although it was obvious you had miss those moments too. And it only made you feel guilty.
- Wanda... I'm sorry I ruined everything for us... I shouldn't have tell you anything that night...
You didn't look back at her, but she did look at you.
- Y/N, you didn't ruin anything... That night it was me the one that screwed up.
- No - you answered - You had a boyfriend and I was your best friend, I wasn't supposed to feel anything other than a friendship... And even if I did I should never tell you just because you were happy with Vision... I should've respected that.
Another silence.
- Can we please drive somewhere else to talk? - she asked.
-To talk? - you asked unsure of what it meant.
- Yes, I feel we need to sort this out, I really miss you Y/N... I wanna try to restore our old friendship... If you want it too, of course.
You thought about it before answering. After some seconds you changed the car direction.
- Yeah, let's talk.
You drove to a nearly park. It was getting kind of late and the place it was almost empty, just a few people walking by. Wanda found a bench for the two of you.
- I don't know what to say - you admitted nervously.
She looked at you.
- Well, first of all, I want you to know that you didn't ruin anything... I understand the reasons why you choose to cut contact with me, if anything I was the one to ruin our friendship, the way I reacted wasn't the best... I'm sorry for making you feel bad.
- Wanda...
- Let me finish - she interrupted you - I know you feel bad because you said you love me, but I want you to understand that I could have had a better reaction... Leave you alone in the hallway was the worst thing I've done.
- It's fine Wanda, you were respecting your relationship and Vision...
- I just wanted to say sorry Y/N, i wish I would had a better reaction.
You nodded.
- I appreciate your apology, but don't worry about it anymore ... I already forgive everything.
- You did? - she asked curious.
- Yes, I realized you were shocked with my confession... There was no way you would've react differently...
- Maybe it was... But there's no way to turn back time right? At least I finally got it out of my system, I wanted to apologize a long time ago.
You smiled kindly. The two of you stared at the sky in silence.
- Your text, the letter you sent me... I think I understood better after reading it... - Wanda said - Thanks for saying all of the nice stuff about me, you really are a goof friend...
- All I said was true Wanda, we've been best friends for so long I couldn't get myself to hate you.. I mean I probably felt like hating you back then, but that was probably more sadness than hate... But all the things I wrote were completely true.
She smiled and hugged you. The affection surprised you, but you just smiled and reciprocated the hug.
- So it's all good between us? - you asked - I want my best friend back.
- Yes! - she answered excited - Yes, everything is fine.
You smiled at her.
- I'm glad.
She was bouncing her feet happily.
- Now tell everything about UCLA, how you've been doing there?
You told her everything about college, your classes, your friends, about your tennis games and everything than ran through your mind in that moment.
You mentioned Sharon briefly, not paying too much attention to the details of your relationship with her.
And the she dropped the bomb: she told you she broke up with Vision.
She explained to you her reasons to end up the relationship and you did nothing but listen.
And when she cried, telling you about her breakdown in college and the moment she decided to leave, you hold her. For a moment it truly felt like you went back in time.
You drove Wanda to her home, and she told you she would call you to make plans for the rest of the summer.
Pietro said hi from his window and you smiled at the sight of your friend.
On the way back home you smiled to yourself. You had a warm feeling on your chest and felt butterflies in your stomach.
Everything was perfect for some days. You and Wanda spent more time together, you even helped her send her application letter to different universities, including UCLA. She wasn't sure at first, but you talked wonders about the college and about how amazing it would be to have her at campus until she finally accepted. It was only a matter of time to hear back from the universities.
But the following week you noticed Peter and Kate get suspicious and secretive around you. At the beginning you thought it was a little bit odd, but then they started to laugh everytime you walked into a room.
It got to a point where the situation became unbearable.
- Okay what is happening? - you finally asked them one day before getting into the movies.
Kate looked at you nervously.
- What....What do you mean? Nothing is happening...
You looked at Peter.
- You will tell me what is happening Peter Parker... Everytime I walk into a room you two laugh and you've been too secretive lately.
They looked at each other.
- Let's tell her Peter, she will have too know anyways - Kate said.
- Tell me what? - you asked confused - I'm not mad or anything I just want to know...
Peter sighed.
- We planned a surprise with Sharon... She's coming to visit in three days.
It ttok you a second to react, and when your brain finally understood what they just said you couldn't help but smile.
- Really? She's coming?
- Yes - Kate answered happily.
- Why didn't you tell me before? I could have help her... Does she have a flight yet? Or do you want me to...
Peter interrupted you, giggling at your excitement.
- Hey Y/N, don't worry, everything is fine and ready, she'll be here in three days, her flight lands on Saturday at noon...
You smiled again and thank them both for their help.
Wanda arrived later that afternoon. Neither of you mentioned Sharon through the whole movie, it was just when you were driving Wanda home when she noticed you were happier than other days. Peter and Kate were in the car with you too cause you asked them to go to house to arrange everything for Saturday.
- You look pretty happy today Y/N - she told you.
- Well, I feel really happy Wanda - you answered with a smile.
- Can I know why? - she asked happily too.
That's the moment it dawned to you. You never told Wanda about your relationship with Sharon. And as you were thinking of this realization, Peter was faster than you to answer to her.
- She's happy because her girlfriend is coming to visit her on Saturday - he explained.
- What?! Your girlfriend?! - she asked confused.
Wanda was shocked to say the least. You never mentioned a girlfriend on the days before, and the news hit her like a bucket of ice water. She didn't know how to feel about it.
You two were recently fixing your friendship. She didn't know if you were still having feelings for her cause she never asked you in order to not jeopardize what you had. But a girlfriend was a factor she didn't consider.
- Yes! Her name is Sharon, we've been planning this surprise for days - Kate explained.
That's when you interfiered.
- She's not my girlfriend - you said nervously looking through the mirror to see your friends - Sharon is my friend, I think I mentioned her before...
Wanda tried to remember and she slightly nodded. She remembered that name.
- So... she's not your girlfriend? - Wanda asked.
You looked at her unsure of what to say.
- Well... It's complicated, we've been dating for a few months now, but we haven't... You know... Make it official
She nodded again as she swallowed dry.
- Maybe it's time Y/N - Kate interrupted - You could ask her now that she's coming... We can help you!
Peter second Kate on the idea and they started rambling about it.
But you noticed a change in Wanda's behavior. She wasn't laughing anymore. Suddenly she got quiet.
You bumped her shoulder to caught her attention.
- Hey, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about my relationship with Sharon, and it's not because I didn't want to... I just forget about it to be honest, and as I said, Sharon and I... We're not officially together yet, we're just... - before you could finish your sentence she interrupted.
- Hey Y/N, it's fine, don't freak out about it... It's just it took me by surprise, but I'm happy to see you happy...
She gave you a reassuring little smile.
- Thanks for understand Wanda... It's been difficult for me to open myself to this feelings... I think it's the first time I I say I'm dating Sharon out loud.
_ I get it, it can be complicated, but don't worry Y/N, if you and Sharon are comfortable with what you have, you don't need to rush it.
You smiled and her.
_ Thank you - you said.
It looked like the conversation about Sharon died right there, but the moment Wanda stepped in her house, she walked straight to her brother's room.
- I just don't know how to feel Pietro... I'm really confuse. I know it might sound selfish to say but I can't believe she didn't tell me before about this girl.... Everything would have been different
- What would've been different? - he asked
- Well, you know, the approach with her... You know I like her Pietro, since we were little, and now that i broke up with Vision... I thought she was single... You know what I mean.
Pietro analyzed her sister's expression.
- You were expecting to date her?
She sighed.
- Well, not straighly date her but... I was expecting some sort of awakening for us... The start of something more.
Pietro looked at her worried.
- Wanda, don't joke around this... You know she loved you, but now with this new information maybe it would be better if you move cautiously... I wouldn't want for you to get hurt.
Wanda buried her head in her hands desesperatly.
- I truly believed this would be our chance... We could be something more...
- You can daydream all you want Wanda, but the truth is, she has a girlfriend now and you have to accept it. And let me be honest with you, I don't think it was correct from you to go close to her with those ulterior motives, if you wanted to date her you should have told her before offer a friendship.
- No, I truly want to fix up our friendship, it is the most important thing for me to save. I just thought it would be nice if something else happened...
Pietro sighed.
- Well, I wish you good luck sestra, when this Sharon girl arrives you're gonna need to find the strength to see her fooling around with Y/N, and I can tell you, it's not gonna be nice...
Wanda barely slept that night. She imaged how would it be with Sharon around. And she thought that it was probably what you felt when she started dating Vision, you had to see her with another person, basically being replaced.
Ohh, only if she knew back then about your feelings. For sure everything would be different.
And she wasn't wrong.
From the moment you picked up Sharon at the airport you two became inseparable, although she was stying at Kate's house cause she basically lived in the Bishop's mansion, so there was more than enough room for her.
Wanda told you to enjoy the first days with her alone. She said you could show her the town and explore the place together, she would tag along later.
You thought it was a good idea. But you also noticed a changed in Wanda's behavior since Peter and Kate mentioned Sharon was your girlfriend. You didn't want to speculate around her feelings, but you couldn't help but ask if she was feeling left out, or replaced. You two were recently getting close again and you didn't want anything to jinx the progress.
But no, Wanda said she wanted to be your friend again. Nothing more.
Sharon was being a delight, as always. Being with her was easy, you never had to think too much about it. And that was probably what you liked more. But now, with her in town you felt tlike something was missing. Sharon made you happy, and she was a good company, but something felt odd at the thought of being more than just... that.
However, you took her to all the fun and interesting places around, telling her a little about the local stories. Peter and Kate sometimes would go with you, but they left you alone as much as possible, totally rooting for you two.
It was on her fifth day there when you planned to visit the amusement park with Sharon, Kate, Peter, Wanda and some other friends.
Wanda was a nervous wreck to say the least. She was wondering how this new dynamic would be. She knew you would spend more time with your girlfriend, she knew you would kiss her and hols her hand and make her laugh. So she prepared herself to control any sort of jealousy reaction she could have.
But the reality hit her as soon as you parked in front of her house to pick her up. She naturally walked to the copilot seat, only to find a blonde girl already sitting there.
- Hey Wanda, this is Sharon Carter, my friend from college. Sharon this Wanda, my best friend - you made the introductions, and the two girls smiled, saying how pleasure was to meet each other.
- I guess you're having a backseat today Maximoff - Kate said, opening the door for her.
- Yeah, I guess today I will be third-wheeling you and Peter back there - Wanda replied, laughing at the guy's reaction.
You laughed at the joke too. Luckily for her you didn't noticed that the passive aggressive answer to Kate was because she felt uncomfortable with the situation.
The rest of the days didn't turn easier for her. You would spent most of your time with Sharon, making silly jokes and fooling around.
Wanda undoubtedly felt jealous. She couldn't help it. And she hated herself for making you feel the same way when she was with Vision.
At some point she just stopped showing up for your get-togethers. She knew she was being selfish, but seeing you with Sharon was driving her mad. Everytime she tried to spend time with you, Sharon had to be there.
But her breaking point reached her on Kate's birthday party. In the middle of the reunion, Sharon's parents called her and she walked up stairs to attend the call.
Wanda found you sitting alone in the sofa and she decided to go talk to you. She was finally having your attention all to herself, you were telling her some dumb joke about ballons, a little bit flushed because of the drinks you had that night, your hair alredy a mess after dancing... She thought you looked beautiful. She tucked a hair behind your ear and you smiled sweetly at her...
It was a very cute moment, just you two talking, so close from each other. Until a pair of arms suround you from behind, you looked up from your seat on the couch and smiled at Sharon.
- Hey! Did you finished the call with your parents? - you asked her.
- Yeah... They just wanted to know about my week but a cut the call soon to be back... Did i miss anything? - she asked, looking at Wanda and you.
- No, i was just telling some jokes, and Wanda was the lucky one to hear them - you said.
Sharon hugged you tighly and Wanda wanted nothing more but dissapear.
- Oh well, i hope Wanda doesn't mind but i need to steal you for a second... there is something i wanna tell you.
Wanda denied with her head.
- Oh no, it´s alright, i was about to leave anyways... Pietro is in his way to take me home so... I should be getting ready.
You said goodbye to Wanda and followed Sharon out to the garden. Wanda remained in place, looking at your hands intertwined with Sharon as you walked out. She left the house as soon as you were out of her sight.
Sharon Carter was a very intelligent girl. Her aunt Peggy taught her to be perceptive, to pay attention to the little details, so it was no surprise to know that she almost immediately noticed the tension between you and Wanda.
She wasn't aware of the full story, she only knew that you and Wanda had a fight before leaving for the university, but it was fixed almost immediately as soon as you had the opportunity to talk about it.
But she had a feeling that there was something more than just "friendship" problems. And that feeling sting her harder the moment she saw you and Wanda talking on the couch. She was too close to your face, and the smile you were giving to her... She needed to do something.
That is the reason why, that night, she asked you to be her girlfriend. You were a bit tipsy, and the euphoria of the moment made you say yes to her right away.
It was just the next morning, when you woke up a little hangover when you realized what had happened last night. You wanted to feel happy, but something just didn't feel right.
Sharon was a great a person, and you knew she would be an amazing girlfriend but now that you were official, something felt off to you.
Perhaps it was because it took you so long to be an actual couple. However, you couldn't just go and tell her you weren't sure about being her girlfriend. You felt some sort of responsibility towards her, like you needed to respond to her feelings. You couldn't just ask her to go back to just date again.
So you got use to the idea of being girlfriends. It couldn't be that bad. At the end, you liked her, she liked you. It could actually work.
Wanda found out about your, now official, relationship a few days later. She noticed how Sharon started to use pet names with you "Babe this... Babe that". She also started to be more affectioned towards you, increasing the PDA at a hundred percent.
She cried once you confirmed it to her. Not in front of you, of course, but at the safety of her room.
She knew she didn't have any right to feel that way, but she couldn't help it. She wish it was easier to let you go.
You still tried to make time for her though, not wanting to jeopardize your just restored friendship. But Sharon always wanted to tag along in your plans. One day Wanda just stopped going out with you, avoiding any uncomfortable moment between your girlfriend and her.
You noticed this change in her behaviour, and when you expressed this concerns with Sharon, she just brush it off saying: Well, perhaps it's for the best, that way we can make more plans for the both of us.
You were confused at her answer, but you just let it go. You'll make plans with Wanda later to talk to her alone. Sharon, in the other hand, made her goal to keep you as away from Wanda as possible.
In the latest days of summer your friends planned a weekend getaway to go camping. Wanda didn't want to go, but everyone told her it would be fun. She turned down every invitation until you were the one to ask her to go. When you knocked on her door that night she didn't find the strength to say no to you. It would be just one night though.
So, there she was, walking next to Kate and Peter looking for a good place to establish the camp. You were walking some steps ahead of them with Sharon by your side, and Wanda was already regretting going.
You had planned spend time with her during the camp. That's why, the moment you found the right place, you asked Wanda to help you set up the tents, meanwhile, Kate asked Sharon to help her take out from the cars all the food they brought.
Sharon walked away, not without giving you a last glance. All she saw was Wanda smiling at you while you read the instructions for the tent.
At night, Sharon asked to talk to you in private. You had spend all the day bounding with Wanda, laughing and making jokes, and you could tell Sharon wasn't happy at all.
- I just don't understand why are you so determined on spending time with her... I'm your gilfriend and i'm here, you should be spending more time with me - she said.
- Sharon, i'm sorry if you felt left out, but Wanda is my best friend... we've been distant lately and i wanted to spend more time with her before the summer ends.. you and me, we alredy spent a lot of time together...
She sighed.
- I know baby, but she needs to understand you have a girlfriend now, that she is not your main priority anymore... Now, please, let's just go to eat some smores and have a fun night.
You just nodded and she kissed you.
You were mad at her. For some reason. Deep down in you, a tiny voice was trying to scream. And that voice was saying that Wanda would always be your main priority.
Later at night, when you found yourself unable to sleep, you sneaked out of the tent you shared with Sharon. You were surprise to find Wanda sitting next to the campfire.
- Hey... Can't sleep? - you asked to caught her attention.
She turned to look at you.
- Yeah, something like that... Kate snores - she said smiling.
- Ohh really? - you laughed - That's quite funny... So you can't sleep because of her snores?
She nodded.
- Yep, i'm kind of a light sleeper, any sound can keep me awake all night.
- Well, then i'll be glad to stay awake all night with you - you said taking a seat next to her.
- Are you sure you want to do that? - she asked- I kind of noticed that Sharon...
You interrumpted her.
- I know, but i don't care. Wanda you're my best friend, if i wanna spend time with you i will spend time with you... I'll deal with Sharon later.
Wanda felt nostalgic at your words.
- What's wrong? - you asked.
She looked at you.
- It's just that... your a better friend than i am. You have a girlfriend and still try to make time for me... i never did that back when i was with Vision.
You smiled at her words.
- Wanda... we are kind of adults now, if i kept acting like when i was in high school i would have a problem. I'm more mature now, i guess i can have a girlfriend and a best friend. You were younger and he was your first boyfriend, i now understand why you acted like that.
- This is what i'm talking about, you're a better person than me Y/N, i don't deserve you.
- Hey don't say that. You are one of the best persons i know Wanda, you can't keep punishing yourself for things you did when you were 16. Like i said the other day at the park, i forgive you, i did it a long time ago.
She looked at the sky.
- I just wish things were different. If only i could turn back time... - she said desperate.
- Wanda please stop, let's just enjoy this moment, okay?
You offered her a hug that she replied immediately. Then you just chill under the stars.
- I got into UCLA - she said out of nowhere after some minutes.
- What? - you asked excited - Are you serious?
She nodded her head smiling.
- Yes, the letter came in this morning... I got in.
- Wanda that is amazing... we will be together in college, like we always dreamed about!
You kept celebrating her for some more minutes and then you just went on talking about the campus and the city.
Wanda watched you in awe, how your eyes sparkled when you talked, the way you smiled and expressed. And she fell deeper for you. When she heard you talk about your future plans with her she couldn't help but daydream about a life by your side.
She daydreamed about living with you, being your girlfriend, marrying you, having kids with you... God, she wanted you bad.
That's why, immersed in the euphoria of the moment, the next words came out of her mouth.
- I love you so much...
And your whole world stopped right there. You stopped your explanation of why your dorm hall was the best in the campus to look at her straight in the eyes.
- What?
Wanda knew there was no turning back. She said it, and she decided to stand to her words.
- I love you so much Y/N, you really don't have and idea of how much. I love your eyes, your voice, your personality; i love your stupid jokes about life... I love how you talk, how you move, how you walk. I love how you treat me, how you protect me. I love how, despite everything i've done, you're still by my side... I think i just love everything about you.
You hear her speak and your heart beat at hundred times per second. The words you always wanted to hear, she was finally saying them.
- Wanda, what are you talking about? - you asked, still in disbelief.
The girl's heart was about to explode. But she needed to keep talking, she couldn't stopped just then.
- Y/N I don't expect you to reciprocate my feelings, not after everything I put you through... But i just need to come clean, can i be honest with you?
You nodded dumbly. You had so many questions, but you knew nothing would come out of your mouth. So you let her talk.
- Y/n i drop out off college because of you, and before you blame yourself, it was mostly because i missed you... You and i had a dream, going to NYU together was our thing, and it shouldn't have been with Vision... I guess, not only the college thing but everyhting, it was never Vision. It was you all along. You were my first love Y/N, i shouldn't have give up on you... on us. Yes, our friendship is the most important thing for me, but if we could be something more... Ughh, now things are just weird between us, and that sucks... and i miss you - she knew she was rambling, but she needed to get everything out - and now you're with someone else, and that's fine but, i just wish it was me... Because even when i made mistakes, it was always you.
When she finished talking you were loss for words. Your heart, your mind, nothing was working correctly. It was like the whole world faded because Wanda told you she loved you.
That's all your mind registered: she loved you.
- Wanda... i don't know what to say to be honest - you said.
She was a mess, her heart was beating like crazy, she was all flustered because of the nerves and her whole body was shaking. She wanted to hear your answer, but she was also afraid of what she might hear.
- I wish things were different too... - you said looking at her - You know, i'm really confuse right now. Sharon... she's someone special to me, i wouldn't want to hurt her, i guess now i understand what you felt about Vision. But, i want to be honest with you too... I don't want to lose you again, you're even more special to me... I want you to be in my life forever. It truly seems like timing never work for us, right? - you joked, making her smile a little - We can be friends Wanda, i'm really excited to be in college with you, if you want that too... I just don't want to lose you.
She started to cry.
- Oh Y/N, i would love to be in your life forever, even if you're not with me, i don't want to lose you either... Thanks for giving me a second chance.
You hugged her even tighter than before, now crying as well. You two stood there for some minutes, melting in each other's embrace. When you broke the hug you noticed it was almost 2 am, so you decided to go back to your tent, wishing her good luck with Kate's snores.
You didn't have much sleep that night though. Your mind kept you up all night.
Wanda told you she love you. She confessed her feelings for you and now it was up to you to take the chance. You looked to your side and found Sharon sleeping soundly. You knew it was unfair for her that you felt that way, but you couldn't deny your feelings: deep down you knew it was Wanda, cause it had always been Wanda.
The next morning you and your friends left the camp and went back home. Sharon noticed you were a little bit quite, but when she asked you about it you just said it was because you hadn't sleep well. Wich wasn't completely a lie.
You spent two days more with her before she flied back to Los Angeles. She was excited cause she got her acceptance letter from Princeton. You were happy for her too, but the situation made you wonder about your future with her. She wouldn't be around UCLA anymore, and that would change your whole dynamic.
She told you not to worry, kissed you one last time and went back home.
In the remaining days you prepared your luggage to return to the university.
Wanda was in some sort of trance. After you told her to be just friends she felt happy cause you would still be in her life, but she also was sad because it wasn't in the way she wanted.
When she told everything to Pietro he told her it was brave to come clean with you, but he was also worried for her sister's feelings.
- I know Y/N well enough to know she won't hurt you, but i'm worried you two are making a mistake. This whole thing of "let's just be friends" can be risky for the both of you.
She just replied:
- We're still friends and that's all that matters, we'll live our college dream together and everything will be fine.
You flied back to Los Angeles, now with Wanda and her parents.
Pietro flied back to Switzerland.
And Sharon flied to New Jersey.
The first weeks of the course went normal. Wanda loved the campus and was thrilling because you were there with her. You showed to her all of your favorite spots and you two settle a schedule to spend time together, mostly studying.
Wanda immediately felt the change from NYU. She was genuinely excited for her classes, she genuinely loved the school, she didn't have to pretend cause she felt happier.
You were happier with her there too. Although something was still feeling out of place.
You thought it was because Sharon wasn't there anymore. You used to call her every night to tell her about your day. She told you all about her campus and her program. You listened to her attentive, but she knew something was off. She could feel it too.
But both of you were too afraid to mention it.
The days passed, and everything felt like a roller coaster for you: in the day everything was exciting and brilliant because you spent it with Wanda. But at night, when you talked to Sharon over the phone, everything felt wrong. Every night you went to sleep with a pit in your stomach wondering why you couldn't be happy with Sharon, but why you felt so complete with Wanda.
Sharon Carter was a very intelligent girl. From the moment you told her Wanda was going to be with you at UCLA she knew you two were doomed. She didn't have to know your complete history with Wanda to know she was someone special for you. Someone who she couldn't compete with, cause she'll always lose to Wanda if it was up to you.
But as intelligent and perceptive as she was, she was firstly, a girl in love. So, leaving behind any insecurity, she was hoping you would chose her. That's why she tried to make things work for the two of you, for as long as she could. A month was enough to completely wear out your relationship.
As intense as her love was, she knew she couldn't alter the course of fate. She recognized that you had alredy found your way with another person, and Sharon understood that she had to let you go, accepting that this time, she couldn't change the destiny of your love.
Sharon called you, like every night. But this time there wasn't any softness in her voice. You knew, from the moment she said you needed to talk, what was the night was heading to.
The conversation was long, tired, and full of regretness. She regretted meeting you. You regretted taking it too far. Both of you regretted making each other so unhappy.
Needless to say, it wasn't an amicable breakup. She cried and you didn't stop asking for forgiveness until she said goodbye and hang up the phone.
You spent your night alone. You cried, but when the sadness left your body completely, you felt lighter. As if the crying had washed away the guilt and the weight from your soul.
The next day you told Wanda about your break up with Sharon. She asked you if you were okay and you mindelessly said yes.
- C'mon Y/N, you know you can be vulnerable with me, there's no need to put on a brave face.
You insisted that everything was fine, and after a few more attempts, she dropped the subject to avoid making you uncomfortable.
She was surprised to hear the news. Sharon seemed like a nice girl, and even when she knew she wasn't veey comfortable with your frienship, she wanted for you to be happy.
She tried to avoid having any inappropriate thoughts, but she couldn't stop herself to wonder about you and her. She knew you had just come out of a relationship, everything was still too fresh, but deep down, a flicker of hope had ignited in her.
You on the other hand was confused with yourself. You wanted to feel bad, to be sad, to grieve your relationship with Sharon. You felt like a complete idiot for not feeling bad. God, your girlfriend had broken up with you, and it had mostly been your fault, but you couldn't feel sad. After crying that first night when you broke up, you never cried again. Now what you felt was guilt for feeling nothing.
Some days later Wanda asked Pietro to call you. She was worried about you cause she thought you were keeping all your pain to yourself. So she decided to call in the big guns.
When you saw Pietro's name on the phone you were excited but a little confused. He made small talk for a while and told you about Switzerland and his girlfriend. When he finally dropped the bomb on why he called you, you couldn't say you were surprised.
- She's just worried about you Y/N.
You sighed.
- I know, but there's no need to be worried, i'm fine.
- Y/N, i'm on the other side of the world and i can tell you're not fine, i can hear ir in your voice. Wanda thinks you're keeping it all to yourself and she just wants you to have someone to talk.
You knew there was no use in trying to denied anymore. Pietro was a close friend. You grew up together as well. He was like a brother to you. That's why you decided to finally speak to him.
- It's just that... I have nothing to talk about Pietro.
You told him all your concerns about your break up with Sharon and you vent with him.
He listened to you carefully, not saying anything at first.
- Why do I feel like crap? - you asked when you finished - I really wanted this relationship to work, i felt something for Sharon, without a doubt. But when things fell apart i felt almost relived that it was over... I'm such a jerk.
- No, you're not, everyone has a way to cope, and just because you're not miserable and sulking doesn't mean you're bad, please don't torture yourself over it. You truly believed you wanted to be with her, you gave your best effort in that relatioship but you can't force yourself to love someone. Sharon was special, but maybe you tried too hard to love her. But why?
You felt your heart racing at his question. You knew damn well why.
- I think i was afraid of what could happen if i wasn't with Sharon.
- So you used her... and don't get me wrong, it can be really fun as a distraction, but when it's over, you think about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart. Maybe that's why you feel nothing but freedom. Now you can make your own decisions Y/N.
You ended the call a minutes later.
For some days you thought about what Pietro said. You were experiencing so many emotions that you asked Wanda to suspend you study sessions together for a few days.
Wanda thought you were taking time apart from her because of your break up. Maybe you wanted time for yourself without her.
It sucked for her cause she believed you were best friends again. But even if you weren't her best friend, she knew you would always be friends.
It was almost ironic. You two never got the timing right. She shot you down and then you did the same to her and now...
She needed to focus her attention on something else.
She sent you a text letting you know she would be at the volleyball tryouts, so if you needed anything you'll knew where to find her.
You texted her back a thumb up emoji and a happy face, wishing her good luck.
You were alone in your room when suddenly Pietro's words rang in your head: Now you can make your own decisions Y/N.
A power took over your body and you walked out of the dorm hall to go to the volleyball court. You were nervious, but you had something to do.
Wanda was talking to the volleyball coach in her office, answering some medical questions fro the formal papers, when you suddenly opened the door.
- Y/N, what are you doing here? - she asked confused.
- Hey, emm i'm sorry coach, i just have to say something...- the coach nodded at you and you looked back at Wanda - Um, are you free for dinner tonight?
- Yes - Wanda said shocked.
- All right, then it's a date... - you said smiling and closing the door to leave.
Wanda smiled like never before. She felt on cloud 9. Her face was all red and her body shaking in excitement. She looked at the coach, rememebering where she was.
- I'm sorry, what was the question? - she asked nervously.
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#wanda maximoff#wanda maximoff x reader#wanda x y/n#wanda maximoff fanfiction#marvel#wandavision#wanda fanfic#wanda x you#wanda maximoff x female reader#elizabeth olsen x reader#lizzie olsen#elizabeth olsen fanfic#elizabeth olsen x you#lizzie olsen x you#lizzie olsen x reader#lizzie olsen fanfic#marvel imagine#wanda imagine#elizabeth olsen x female reader
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Something Real
A/N: Requested? No. Did I have any real plan for this? No. Would I like to write something non angst-y for Cassian for once? Yes, but today is not that day.
Warnings: None (unless you count this not being proof read)
Words: 758
Nothing felt real. How could it with a life built almost entirely on lies? Lies for survival, for information, for security. There was safety in lies. No one could get too close. No one could see the real version - if that version even existed anymore. There were just the lies. One piled on top of the other until it created this new person, one who doesn’t look back, doesn’t feel.
That was until you met him. Someone even more closed off than you. Someone willing to do anything they had to do in order to get the job done.
Cassian Andor chipped away at you, slowly, gradually, as if he were carving life into a statue made of stone. He took his time learning things about you that you had deemed insignificant. Things that Cassian had realized were truths. Your favorite fruit, your small expressions and tells that told him when you were upset or anxious. Things you hadn’t realized you needed to hide.
In turn you picked up on his habits. The quirk of his brow when he was taking in new information, the twitching of his hands when he grew restless, the far away look he would reserve for when he thought he was alone - no one watching. But you were observing, curious, mind racing at to what or who could be occupying his thoughts.
Tonight was a quiet night, a rarity on the base. No new mission, nothing needed of you. Still, sleep evaded you. You sat outside, cool night air brushing past you. Eyes turned up towards the star you took a calming breath.
You felt him before you heard him. Your body tuned to his like a magnet. He quietly sat down next to you. Wordlessly, he passed you a cup and placed a blanket gently along your shoulders.
You turned your gaze to him, but Cassian was already looking forward. You sipped on the warm drink as you tried to steady yourself. Being around Cassian was unnerving. He knew you in ways no one else did. Ways you yourself had long forgotten. The thought terrified you.
“Why?” you choked out.
Cassian didn’t bother looking at you, his gaze fixed on the horizon. “Why, what?” He said softly, his body relaxing as he leaned back - hands splayed behind him.
You weren’t sure what you were asking. Why care about me? Why bother? “Why me?” You clipped out, your body shifting to face him.
“I don’t understand,” he turned to face you now. His eyebrows furrowed in a way that made you want to press your thumb and smooth it out.
“Why do you try so hard to know someone who doesn’t exist? I don’t exist anymore, Cassian. I am whatever and whoever the rebellion needs me to be. What I want and who I was don’t matter anymore.”
Cassian let out a soft laugh at your statement. “I know who you are - as much as you know who I am.”
“How can you know who I am when I don’t even know?” You were frustrated, agitating clearly in your words.
“You know who you are. Even if you don’t want to acknowledge it,” Cassian met your eyes, “You are brave even when you don’t feel it, you are kind to everyone - even to those who may not deserve it, you fight everyday because it is what’s right. You see everyone for who they are - even when you cannot see it in yourself.”
“I don’t know what’s real anymore, Cass,” you whispered, tears pooling in your eyes.
“My feelings for you - that’s real.” Cassian leaned his forehead against yours. “This moment, here, is real.”
You took a deep steadying breath, your thumb grazing Cassian’s cheek. “I don’t want to lose you.”
That was the truth. The real truth. Fear of losing Cassian like you’d lost everyone caused you to live the lies. If no one knew the real you, they could never get close. You’d never have to feel that gaping loss, the fissure that never closed but only grew bigger.
“I’m afraid, Cass,” you murmured. You could feel Cassian’s smile against your hand.
“Someone I loved very dearly once told me that that’s just love. It can’t be helped. But I’m willing to be afraid with you - to have something real. I want that - with you.”
You pulled Cassian in for an embrace, blanket falling off your shoulders and forgotten.
If Cassian was the only real thing in your life you’d hold onto it with everything you had - for however long you had.
#cassian andor x you#cassian andor imagine#cassian andor x reader#cassian andor#star wars#star wars imagines#star wars x reader#star wars imagine
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I have a potentially funny/potentially angsty scenario to run by you out of curiosity.
So, Lucifer has never used his workshop at the hotel, right? What if one day out of the blue, he has the sudden impulse to finally go into his workshop for the first time in months?
It's just another one of those days where he has nothing to really do around the hotel, so he randomly decides to go to see how much time he can kill in the workshop. He doesn't intend to be in there long, and everyone else is busy, so he doesn't bother telling anybody where he's going. Why should he? It's only going to be for a few minutes, a half hour at most. Why, he doesn’t even bother bringing his phone with him, and besides, the battery's dead and needs to charge anyway. Damn adhd/depression combo.
So Lucifer, without telling anybody where he's going, pays a visit to the workshop that hasn't gotten any use since it was made. The workshop that the majority of the hotel residents and staff have probably either forgotten was there or never knew existed in the first place. He's only expecting to be in there a short while, maybe do a little painting, maybe a little crafting, maybe a little tinkering. Just futz about for a bit until lunchtime rolls around...
He ends up unexpectedly hyperfixating like crazy and doesn't leave the workshop for a minimum of three days.
So, my questions are:
How long does it take for anybody to find him?
Who is it that does eventually find him?
In the event that nobody finds him because nobody thinks to check the hotel workshop, how long does it take for Lucifer to come out of his fugue state and re-emerge on his own?
And finally, when Lucifer does stumble his way back to rejoin society - probably very tired, very hungry, and very much in need of a shower - how much trouble is he in with the rest of the hotel? Particularly Charlie and Alastor?
Optional Bonus Question!
What is the project Lucifer ends up hyperfixating on?
Apologies for the late answer, I've been out of town.
I can't go into the workshop too much because it will end up as a plot point. But!
How long does it take for anybody to find him? That evening. Lucifer might have to spend a night or two wondering where Alastor is, Alastor has no such patience and will find him. There is no hiding in the hotel from Alastor.
Who is it that does eventually find him? Alastor because he’s just getting used to sleeping with someone else and he’s not about to stop now.
In the event that nobody finds him because nobody thinks to check the hotel workshop, how long does it take for Lucifer to come out of his fugue state and re-emerge on his own? Alastor would absolutely find him, but his record for hyperfocus is well over a year, and in that case, he only snapped out of it because he was running out of room for ducks.
And finally, when Lucifer does stumble his way back to rejoin society - probably very tired, very hungry, and very much in need of a shower - how much trouble is he in with the rest of the hotel? Particularly Charlie and Alastor? Charlie would be filled with anxious concern and care. Alastor would physically pick him up and carry him to the shower, complaining the entire time about how he stinks, how dare he do this to them all, does he have any idea how concerned Charlie was for him, such disrespect, look at the state of your hair, have you no shame...
Optional Bonus Question!
What is the project Lucifer ends up hyperfixating on? How to fix a sentient broken microphone.
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