#And said he was the one in the wrong for... walking past her car that he saw us get in.
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uchispeach · 1 day ago
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Sycamore Tree (Ch. 6)
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Dark! Rafe Cameron x Fem! Reader
Warnings: DUB-CON, rough sex, virginity loss, corruption kink, slight dacryphilia, manhandling, possessive & manipulative behavior, violence, addiction & mentions of drug consume…
A/N: Shit’s about to go DOWN. Also, sorry for the slow updates. I was just in a bad mental state.
This fic will contain dark content: such as dub-con/ non-con and violence. You have been warned.
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“Do you really have to leave?” John B’s voice sounded like a saddened plea. You felt a strange wave of shame warming up your body as you finished digging for your keys inside the tote bag’s mess. “I’m sorry, I promise I’ll double my shift tomorrow” Your joke came out as lighthearted, the opposite of your current uncomfortable state. “You better, cause’ Pope is unbearably insufferable when you aren’t here.”
The dark haired boy snored softly from the old living room’s couch, his singular crutch resting next to him.
Seeing the still present bandage covering his one knee made your heart sting a little, either way, you waved your blond friend goodbye and followed the path to the front yard.
The crack of the rusty door wasn’t loud enough to disturb the couple sitting at the porch. Neither did your footsteps create any sort of distraction between them, it was not until you walked down the set of stairs and wrapped your fingers around your car’s handle when you dared to interrupt. “So, you’ll cover me today at The Wreck, right?” Your voice was made purposefully deeper to dominate above the sound of passionate kissing between Kiara and her boyfriend.
Your sister separated her lips from the rebel boy’s, only to grimace at you in an exasperated face. “Guess I’ll fucking have to.” Her annoyance grew clearer on her features, probably regretting owing you a favor. “Thank you…” You said softly, smiling sincerely at her while hopping on the driver’s seat.
The way your fingers wrapped around the steering wheel was unusual, too much strength applied to a rather simple action. A weird feeling installed itself on your chest, polluting the excitement of seeing the blond once again.
Rafe had leaked its way into you, maybe deeper than you wished for. Sneaking around with the Kook didn’t feel quite right at all times, primarily knowing it had to be kept a secret from your friends and sister. But he wrapped you in his life with such intensity you didn’t know how to tell him ‘no’.
These past few days had been unimaginably perfect with the blond boy. Hours spent tanning under the sun while resting on his toned chest, soft kisses on the lips by the edge of his Olympic pool and restless midnight calls, ones less innocent than others…Still, you hesitated before stepping on Cameron's vast land.
The noise in your brain made it harder to recognize the tumultuous chaos waiting around the corner. A pained groan was the first thing you got to decipher from the mix of aggressive shouting. Your movements failed to be cautious as you rushed to the scene.
Rafe’s motorbike laying uncaringly on the ground took you by surprise, such an expensive and imposing machine being treated with such anger. Then, there was a thud; like a sack of rocks crashing against pavement. But the most brutal part of it all, was seeing your lover holding his abdomen in prominent pain.
Your gasp was enough to catch his attention, and you ran to his side with desperation when a trail of blood went down his mouth. “What is wrong with you?” You were acting foolishly, screaming and whining at the well-known plug and delinquent standing right in front of you, acting all offended at the sight of a hurt loved one.
Barry had his chest puffed out, big tacky sunglasses combining with his uncared for hair and dirty tank top. His fists were tensed on a harsh squeeze, proving the pent up violence - shown in the form of blood accumulated on his knuckles.
Your palm rested carefully on Rafe’s forearm while your knees clashed against his side. A simple inspection to his form told you they had been fighting for a prolonged amount of time. Still, a raw batch of burned flesh twitching near his wrist made your eyes widen in worry. “Go away. Now!” The tone of your voice wasn’t intimidating to the black haired boy at all, not when it sounded more like a sob than an actual demand.
The Cameron boy coughed, rumbling chest causing even more pain to his bruised ribs. “Get out or I’ll call-” Barry stepped closer, and you considered shielding the blond with your own body as you saw the crazy look on the Pogue’s face. “You better get me my money or I’ll put a hole between those lame ass eyebrows of yours. Fucking junkie!” He pointed a shaky finger, trembling in clear fury.
He stomped closer, moving his limbs with aggressiveness. “Don’t!” You screamed at the thug when he kneeled beside. “Meanwhile…” he mockingly moved away, effortlessly standing up along the motorbike. “…I’ll take this lady with me.” His sandals clutched the pedals with force as he started the engine.
“You know your deadline, country club. Don’t make me come for your cocaine filled ass!” The last threat was thrown as he rode away. Your shocked state wasn’t enough to pull you away from the responsibility presented at your sight. “Rafe, stay still.” Your plea went silent to Cameron's ears as he supported his palms and knees on the rocky path. “Hey, take it slow.” You reached out for his tensed arm, trying to comfort the storm going on inside him.
You were quick to jump when your contact was received with a hiss. A clear complaint to the abrasive touch on one of his multiple wounds. “I’m sorry.” You felt pathetically lost at the situation, not sure on how to act or what to say to avoid adding any stress to his already stressful situation.
He completely ignored you while his clumsy limbs tried their best to lift him up. “Fuck!” He barked at the third failed attempt to walk off the scene. “Here…” You whispered shyly while offering your frail shoulders as support for the burly boy.
His face grimaced, knowing he had no other choice but to accept your support. Your panting was almost suffocated by Rafe’s curses as you struggled to take him inside the mansion.
Out of breath, you guided him to the all-white couch. A piece of furniture that could only be chosen by Rose’s expensive taste, its functionality as small as your skill to position Rafe on a swift move. “Shit…just drop me.” He demanded in his deep voice, warm breath caressing your sensitive ear. “Okay, just…be careful”
Even in his vulnerable state, you couldn’t help but notice the veins popping up over his flexed muscles, their presence intensified by the trauma all his body had just went through. The blond closed his eyes while facing the ceiling, fed up attitude convincing you not to make any instigation.
You stood frozen in the spacious living room, feeling useless at the lack of ideas running through your brain as the blond wriggled in despair. Then you remembered:
“Rafe, calm down.” Your little self begged the relentless kid to know some peace. Younger Rafe continued making a big mess with all the kitchen drawers. “It was right here, where did that stupid hag put it?” He shook the wood cupboards as if they were mere boxes.
“Rafe” You stepped closer to the frenetic being, your poor friend trembling in frustration as he dug deeper into the endless silverware. “What?!” He reacted late and enraged, closing his fingers on a vile grip as his teary eyes finally faced you. “You’re bleeding.” Your small fingertips brushed against the open cut angrily bleeding on his forehead.
“Who cares?!…” His breathing grew more intense as his sobs became closer. “…my dad is going to kill me when he finds out.” You saw his bloodied knuckles tensing while his palms went up and down his face, roughly rubbing his childish features. “We will explain to him…” Your tiny neck went sore when being tilted to the side for so long, but you were desperate to see those two blue orbs.
“Explain what?…that I disobeyed him once again and broke his shitty bike.” He took you by surprise when his stronger grip terrorized your shoulders with careless movements. “I’m such an idiot.” A tear fell sourly down his smooth skin, entering between his pink lips and giving him a salty taste of his own fear.
“Where’s your first aid kit?” Carefully, you removed his strong hands from obstructing your freedom. “Restroom” His voice came out fragile, throat tired from all the shouting and crying.
And as you made your way to the cabinet over the toilet, you couldn’t help but take some steps back and show your chubby face from the room’s inside: “It’ll be all okay…” You tried cheering him on with a juvenile smile on your tender lips, still, Rafe looked quite frozen in his stressful state.
Not much has changed since then, he still handled vulnerability with excessive rage and aggressiveness. “I’ll get you some bandages and something to disinfect those wounds.” You spoke quietly, tip-toeing your way to the rest room’s drawer to find the dusty metallic box.
Your eyes tried to stay glued to the Red Cross decorating the white cover, even though the blond’s burning stare was clearly calling so deeply for your attention. Your conviction didn’t last long, and you were quick to meet his deeply focused orbs.
His stare moved with you, millimeter by millimeter, almost as he was scared you would dissolve into thin air and leave him all alone. You would never do that though, and that was proved when you kneeled betwen his legs to reach that red and twitching skin on his long arm.
You could swear his pupils polluted his gaze, making it darker as he saw you skillfully wiping the dirt particles from his exposed pain. “I’m sorry…” The liquid started dripping down your wrist as you squeezed the cotton a little too hard. It was rare for an apology to leave that snarky mouth you had grown to admire so much. “I’ll take care of it. Yeah…I’m a proactive type of person, I-I” He clearly struggled with putting the right words in the right sentence.
You simply looked up at him in empathy, sweet lashes moving slowly in the air as your soft features did your best at consoling him. “I know.” You really didn’t, but you knew better than to contradict him. And it seemed to work your way, because he stayed calm for the rest of your tending.
(…)
Helping the heavy young man climb the endless stairs to his room wasn’t an easy task, not when his rigid muscles buried against your delicate figure.
You were an expert at putting others before yourself, that’s why your comfort and peace had become the last of your priorities as soon as you saw the blond suffering. He looked quite calm by now, as peacefully as he allowed himself to be while laying on your naked thighs.
His strong and rough fingertips gripping your leg’s flesh with a securing force. While his other palm circled his way around your waist, making sure you wouldn’t move a single centimeter away from his warmth.
You didn’t know what possessed you to interrupt his therapeutic-like session, maybe it was his nose burying selfishly against your flesh, the forming redness around your hips or the careless squeezes he gave your stomach in hopes of calming his own demons down; but either way, you took the unjustified decision of altering him with an abrasive question: “Are you consuming again?”
Your naivety had limits. You had heard the rumours, the whispers, the jokes, you had seen the photos with the white lines in the background and the crazed look on his beautiful eyes in certain wild parties; he had himself given you a hint or two of his unhealthy habits. Still, you were dumb enough to believe he had stopped recurring to those self-destructive tendencies as soon as you moved by his side. You had thought the company you provided, alongside the words of encouragement and love were enough to pull him away from that evil source of entertainment. Perhaps the disappointment had clouded your mind.
A pained moan escaped your throat when his cold rings stung your exposed skin. He wasn’t joyful at all with your newfound curiosity. “You have no idea what it’s like.” His voice was monotone, almost like an automatic response being played on a haunted recorder.
“You cannot do this to yourself…it’s-“ You flinched at his sudden strength. Hard rock chest invading your personal space as his overpowering form stood imposingly. “I said you don’t have a fucking idea what it’s like!” Spit flew to your face, forcing you to squeeze your eyelids together in hopes of disappearing.
Your jaw was squished tightly by a set of calloused hands. “Listen to me!” The angle he took had his face looking scary, shadows sharpening his already intimidating features. “The pressure, the lack of respect, the loneliness…it’s too fucking much!” The angry vein reappeared on his front with the aggressive display.
You stood frozen for a moment, feeling nauseous at the distress in your lover’s voice. But something revolutionary happened deep inside, causing you to peel your eyes at him while wiggling in the forceful hold. “Hurting yourself won’t help!” Now, your hands were the ones surrounding his mandibule.
“You have to stop doing this to yourself…” Salty water started accumulating in his inferior eyelashes. His pink lips lightly wobbled, showing his deep rooted sadness. “Please, Rafe.” The smooth skin of your thumbs caressed his cheeks with so much empathy, it had him closing his teary eyes.
“Please…” you muttered from the depths of your heart. Your rosy lips received him with tenderness, stealing his words away as you moved your mouth against his in a quicker pace.
The Cameron boy was quick to react, affectionate tongue craving a taste of your own wet muscle. The kiss was consuming and passionate, showing a deep connection coming from both ends. You were receiving everything he had to give, almost as he had the power to discharge all his problems on you.
A trail of saliva kept you attached when he finally pushed away. A hungry spark was present in his deep stare, pushing you to the king size bed with a rough impulse.
The soft sheets contrasted the harsh palms who tugged brutishly at your top, desperate for the bare skin waiting under the thin fabric. The ripped bra didn’t cause any new sounds for you, you were practically used to his mean ways.
The teeth on your sensitive mounds were still startling for your mushy brain. He bit into your nipples as if they were made of candy. His expert licks and twists had you arching your back and gripping the blanket with an inhumane strength.
Rafe seemed to enjoy cupping your wet breasts with his huge hand, smirking at the perfection in which they covered the whole area. The massages were short but they still managed to provoke some sweet mewls from your part.
Shyly, you decided to peek at the suddenly arrogant blond, catching a glimpse of his predatory features as he started going down your belly, trying to reach a fairly unexplored place. Nervousness leaked through your pleasure as his expert digits unbuttoned your shorts. “I need to be inside of you.” He said with frenzy, swift moves ensuring your bottoms ended up on the bedroom’s floor.
“Rafe, wait.” Your whimpering took the seriousness away from your weak demand. The boy’s tongue wetted your underwear further by sucking right above your favorite spot. Light spasms were sent all over your spine as the wet patch on your cotton panties grew bigger with his relentless thirst. “I’m gonna’ stretch your pussy so good.” He groaned while sliding the small piece of clothing down your legs.
You always knew he was a big guy, but having him on top of you had your lungs feeling like they were about to give up. “You’re entirely mine…” Your heartbeat accelerated to an abnormal velocity as soon as the sound of his belt hitting the floor reached your ears. “…I’mma show you real’ soon.” Curiosity took the best from you as your eyes immediately searched for him.
His cock was already leaking pre cum from its huge head, the blond took advantage of it by rubbing the liquid up and down his own length. The veins on it glistened, making his member look all more intimidating.
The size of it had you growing nervous, its pink tip looking desperate to be let in. “I…” your instinct kicked in, forcing your nails to make contact with his toned pelvis. “Open those pretty legs for me.” The order was followed by a harsh tug on your neck, long digits keeping you still against a pillow.
Rafe desire was shown to be primal as the friction with your own sex had him grunting in pleasure. “Fuck, it’s perfect.” One of your legs had been pinned against your chest, letting you completely helpless at his attack.
Swallowing was hard to do when his excitement provoked his hand to wrap harsher around your throat, still, the scream that ripped from your larynx wasn’t completely choked. “Oh, shit!” His curses were raw, just as the intrusive member that had been pushed inside your tight walls.
At first his pace was slow, drawing languid wails from you. Then, he got cocky, too overwhelmed by your warm and soaked hole.
“It hurts.” You managed to express as your body was rocked up and down by Rafe’s beast-like thrusts. “Take it, fucking take it…all of it.” The man above you was possessed, possessed by the way your pussy sucked him in.
Big fat tears ran down your puffy cheeks, and even though they were a beautiful sight, the blond’s attention was captured by your unruling breasts - mounds of plump flesh jumping at the attack-.
The wealthy Kook’s stamina wasn’t something to play with, you had seen him playing sports, riding his motorbike and lifting heavy weights but you had never imagined he could be so brutal and mean when it came to sex, not when your experience had been nonexistent before him. In contrast, he seemed to be in his element, lifting your knee higher to pump harder onto that one spot he found to make you scream.
“Oh, fuck…I’m breaking you in half!” His lips stretched in mockery as he saw the red streaks of blood decorating his pulsing dick, proof of the innocence he had just ripped you from. “Rafe!” Your vocabulary was shortened to whining and moaning out his name, accompanied by short pleas of mercy.
Either way, mercy wasn’t in his vocabulary, not when his tip bruised against your cervix in such delirious ways. “Not one single man apart from me will ever get to touch you.” You were sure your neck was turning all types of purple as he applied more pressure. “You understand?” He did a particularly harsh trust, making you tremble with the promise of a nearby orgasm.
“Yes! I’m yours…I’m yours.” Rafe chuckled when your own hips crashed against his, desperate for a bigger friction. “That 's right…you’re my little slut.” The blond looked for your warmth, nearing his chest with yours to bury his nose in your clavicle. “Can you feel me?” The question was non verbally answer by the high pitched cry that escaped your throat as he pressed on your belly bulge -the protuberance caused by his monstrous length-. “I’m all up in your stomach.” His canines brushed harshly against your jaw, and you didn’t need to see his face to know he had a wolfish grin decorating it.
His name sounded like a prayer coming from your honeyed vocal cords. “That 's right. Come all over me.” And you did, his sentence releasing the knot that had been building up your belly for the longest time.
And as your climax washed all over your senses, Rafe continued to push your limits by grinding deeper against you, causing a deeply embarrassing wet noise. Your fluids received him with squelches. He rejoiced on the overstimulation coming from your tight sex, squeezing him in delicious spasms.
You became putty in his hands, not even worrying when his thrusts became slower and his breathing faster. Too thrilled by the lust and attentiveness in the wet kisses he gave your chest, and the romantic promises of possession he mumbled into your brain.
You were still riding your high when a prolonged grunt left from the depths of his throat, the sticky feeling of a foreign liquid filling you from the inside had you cringing. The sensation was warm and overwhelming, not like anything you had experienced before, alongside the soft drilling of his cock in your now cum-filled cunt.
“You’re not getting rid of me, ever.” He muttered against your stammering heart, choking you with calloused digits for the last time.
(…)
Rafe’s black truck shone under the moonlight, causing you to catch a glimpse of your reflection on the spotless paint. Your strapless white dress had a nice flowy skirt to it, well accompanied by your also white kitten heels.
The outfit was fully orchestrated by the blond, as he seemed to enjoy styling your whole look. He undressed you and dressed you like a life size doll, caressing every curve and dip with his skilled palms. He enjoyed sniffing your hair while carefully passing the comb between your silky strands and perfuming you with his own personal scent; it was all too personal and intimate.
Your hands were in front of you, both gripping your cute purse while waiting for your attractive date. “Let’s go, doll” You jumped at the sudden voice, only relaxed at the familiarity of it. “I’m more than ready…” You gave him a small smile, turning your head around to receive his gaze. He hummed in response, nearing his chest to your back while reaching out for your dress.
His digits slipped under your top, holding the fabric before gliding it up, causing your cleavage to stay well hidden. “Now, you’re ready.” His lips were shortly on yours before he helped you climb up the vehicle.
The leather seats of Rafe’s Range Rover felt like heaven, the soft lighting and his intoxicating cologne only making him more irresistible. You couldn’t help but notice how good he looked in that moment—effortlessly charming, like he owned everything around him. Rafe crossed his arms, taking his time before starting the engine. “What?” You asked in a funny tone, finding him cute as he smiled with one side of his face.
His half smirk grew bigger, and you couldn’t help but giggle a little. “Just tell me.” You patted him softly on the bicep, feeling playful. “Open the glove compartment.” He blinked at you.
A spark of excitement could be seen in your big eyes, growing bigger as you saw two white boxes shining brightly at you. “Can I?” Your politeness pulled you back from opening them. “Of course, pretty…they’re all yours.”
You squealed in happinesses, deciding to uncover the smaller one first; a gold open cuff bracelet was revealed to your sight, looking delicate and ethereal in its cushioned place.
Your fingers brushed against the smooth material, soon surprised by the small crevices on it; a combination of four perfectly symmetrical letters read: ‘Rafe’.
The Kook took the piece of jewelry from your hold, as well as your arm. He leaned over, kissing your wrist with delicacy before making you wear his gift. “Everyone should know…that you’re my girl.” Heat travelled fast to your face.
“It’s so beautiful.” Rafe seemed satisfied with your reaction, a cocky grin on his handsome face. “There’s more…” He signaled to the other box. “All right…no!” Your eyes focused on the big image showcased on the front: A brand new phone.
“No, Rafe! I-” His sigh made you go quiet. “Yours was all broken,” the device kept on your purse had a simple scratch, but it just seemed to be no longer useful to the blond. “Come on, it’s pink…I know you love pink.” The wink he sent your way had you growing even more flustered.
“Okay…” You prolonged the word, not fully convinced with his ways of spending but still grateful. “Thanks!” You jumped to his side on a cozy hug.
(…)
Each step you took made your legs feel heavier, you didn’t know if it was the heavy weight of Rafe’s shredded arm around you, or the physiological effect of the loud voices and rap music coming from Kelce’s house, either way, your hands started sweating when the multiple voices of drunk teenagers came to your ears.
The party was already in full blast when you both arrived, making your anxiety rise even more. And it didn’t help that everyone seemed to recognize your blond companion: “Yo, Rafe” you could hear from multiple guys, all with similar looks to the last mentioned -polo shirt, surfer shorts and an expensive watch on wrist-. Still, that didn’t destabilize you as much as the sour looks some girls sent your way or the creepy faces a couple of boys made when staring at your silhouette.
One thing was clear: being with the Cameron boy was signing a contract with unrequited attention. “Stay by my side, all right?” You awkwardly nodded, not too sure on what to do with yourself.
Rafe slightly drifted away from you, catching the attention of a random brunette. She seemed friendly enough around him, showcasing a flirty smile while he whispered in his ear: “Hey, if you guys got any cash. Downstairs, okay?” The girl agreed with a bite to her lower lip, scanning your boyfriend from head to toe before leaving the room.
The next target was the party’s owner, who approached the blond with a big smile on his face. “Yo, Rafe. Where you been at?” They were both unashamedly loud, doing a handshake before smirking at each other. The taller one didn’t lose his time, patting Kelce on the back while making his proposal: “I got some yayo. Spread the word.” The voice of a leader he had, because the dark haired boy was quick to run around the house looking for contendants.
Rafe looked you straight in the eye, ringed digits combing through his hair with slight stress. You nervously smiled at him, trying to downplay the bizarre situation. “C’mon” He signaled for you to come, and you did, allowing him to guide you by the waist.
(…)
You didn’t exactly remember how you ended up there, or how long it took for the couches surrounding you to fill up with energized Kooks, all you knew was that your current position wasn’t comfortable at all. Fancy glass table filled with rolled dollar bills, dusty credit cards and mountains of white powder.
The metallic smell of money made you feel even dizzier and it didn’t help that the blond was counting every single buck right next to you. His heirloom ring shining mockingly at you while your ass sat prettily on his lap.
You had complained when he forced you to throw your naked legs over his meaty thigh, feeling embarrassed at the nosy eyes pointing at your exposed figure. It didn’t feel any better when Rafe decided to occasionally pinch your hips or squeeze your ass with his whole palm.
His sudden touchiness could be blamed on the lighted blunt resting on someone’s hand. He had blown the smoke on your face before saying how much he liked having you all to himself, clearly being freed from all decency.
The rest had even laughed when an intended sexy bite on your lower lip ended up being too harsh and making you flinch.
Either way, Rafe had managed to pull some of your worries away with the sudden presence of weed in your system. Nevertheless, a new arrival had you connecting back with your five senses. “You know, 60 dollars isn’t enough for the amount of coke you’ve being doing tonight, but-” Heavy footsteps echoed through the spacious room, coming from a stomping Topper. “Top! Hey! Top” Effusive shouts left Rafe’s snarky lips, gaining the attention from the grumpy guy.
The shorter Kook was in a bad mood, seemingly aggravated as soon as his eyes found you. An annoyed look was all he showed you before completely focusing on your companion. “What’s up?” His answer was as nonchalant as his attitude. “Sit down, man!” The order was clear, leaving Top no other choice but to take a seat right next to you. “You want a bump?” An unknown blonde girl patted the Kook’s shoulder, hoping her seductive eyes would convince him of snorting a line.
You saw your boyfriend’s friend hesitate in the midst of the pressure coming from all the other participants, and for a second you thought of intervening. That was before he completely leaned over the sofa to consume the biggest line of coke you had ever seen in your entire life.
“Woo!” He stood up in frenzy, causing a deep chuckle from the blond under you. “Hey. Take it easy, man…This is your first rodeo.” Rafe commented to the coughing boy whose movements were nothing but coordinated. “Hell no, it ain’t!” He flexed his toned chest at the adrenaline, sitting right back down and rolling a new dollar bill with his trembling hands.
“Rafe, don’t you think-” Your brows furrowed together at Topper’s abruptness. A few recreational drugs in your lungs wouldn’t make you dumb enough to believe this was entirely right.
“Tch. Just focus on me, nobody else…” The Cameron boy said while gripping your chin with force, pulling your sight away from the chaos.
His slightly red eyes made him seem cuter, as well as his tensed jaw.
Even with his brother’s handsome face above yours, you couldn’t help but notice a familiar girl standing on the corner. Sarah had her arms crossed over her chest, and the look on her face was more shocked than angry.
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sosa2imagines · 2 days ago
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Hey can I please request a Lloyd x reader where she is his ex-wife but he wants her back? Maybe they have a child together (they're the only people who he is really sweet and soft with, he lights up when he sees them) and idk maybe their child wants them together too? He's trying to find excuses to see her or kiss her and he has their child as a support?
Idk whatever you find interesting or have inspo for ❤️
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Thank you for this amazing ask. I hope you like it. Warning- Little angst and fluff.
Your hands tremble slightly as you pack your son's backpack for his weekend with Lloyd. It’s a routine exchange, one you've done countless times since the divorce, but the familiar ache always lingers. 
Sharing custody of Victor is always a bittersweet affair. Every time you see him, the resemblance to his father becomes more and more apparent. His bright eyes and mischievous smile are like a living reminder of what you once had together. Yet, despite the pang in your heart, you push your feelings aside, knowing that this arrangement is for the best.
The doorbell rings, and you exhale deeply before opening it.
Lloyd stands before you, immaculate in his polo shirt and with that same cocky smirk you've come to know all too well. Despite your best efforts, your pulse quickens at the sight of him, a reaction you've tried to suppress but have never been able to completely control.
Damn that moustache! Always been your weakness.
You fix your expression, forcing a neutral smile as you step aside to let him in. You're used to this routine by now, but the sight of him still dredges up a mix of emotions you'd rather keep bottled up.
“Ready for our little guy?” he asks, his voice annoyingly smooth, like melted chocolate. Victor bolts past you, yelling, “Daddy!” as Lloyd scoops him up effortlessly, peppering his son's face with exaggerated kisses that make the boy squeal with laughter.  
When your son was born, Lloyd had named him Victor, saying he's his biggest victory in life.
You force a polite smile, ignoring the way Lloyd's eyes flick to yours, softening. He always looks at you like that, like you're still the most important thing in his world, even after everything.  
After Sierra Six.  
The memory burns like acid. Sierra Six had been your breaking point. Lloyd's obsession with catching the rogue operative consumed him, pulling him deeper into his dangerous world and further away from you. You had begged him to walk away, to prioritize his family, but he couldn’t let it go.  
“You don't understand, Sugar!” he'd said during one of your final arguments, his voice sharp but his eyes pleading. “This isn't just a mission. It's personal.”  
It became personal for you too, when Six's retaliation nearly cost you and Victor your lives. A car bomb meant for Lloyd had detonated outside your home, leaving shards of glass and smoke as a grim reminder of the risk you couldn’t live with anymore. You’d left that night, taking Victor with you, and filed for divorce shortly after.  
“Thanks for packing his stuff…” Lloyd says now, breaking you out of your thoughts. He hesitates, then adds, “You could come with us, you know? We're just going to the park.”  
“That’s your time with him…” you reply, keeping your tone neutral.  
Victor tugs at your sleeve. “But, Mommy, you should come! Daddy says he misses you.”  
Your breath catches, and Lloyd clears his throat, awkwardly running a hand through his perfectly styled hair. “Victor, buddy, why don't you go grab your soccer ball from the car?”  
Once Victor bounds away, Lloyd steps closer. “He’s not wrong…” he says softly, his gaze holding yours.  
“Lloyd…” You start to protest, but he cuts you off.  
“I know I screwed up. I know I didn’t protect you the way I should have, but I’m trying, Sugar. I’m trying to fix things. For you. For Victor. For us.”  
You cross your arms, a shield against the vulnerability in his voice. “You can’t just say these things and expect everything to magically go back to how it was.”  
“Then let me show you...” he says, taking another step closer. His hand brushes yours, testing waters. “Let me prove it to you.”  
Before you can respond, Victor runs back, his soccer ball in hand. “I got it! Mommy, are you coming with us?”  
Lloyd kneels down, pulling Victor into a side hug. “Tell you what, buddy. Why don’t we see if we can convince Mommy to join us next time, huh?”  
Victor pouts dramatically, his big eyes, the same shade of blue as his father’s turns on you, “Please, Mommy? Daddy says families should stick together.”  
Your heart squeezes at the sight of them, your two boys. Lloyd stands, his eyes never leaving yours, and he leans down just slightly, so close you can feel the warmth of his breath.  
“Think about it…” he murmurs, before pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. It lingers, a promise in its tenderness, and leaves you standing there, your resolve crumbling ever so slightly.  
As they walk away, Victor waves enthusiastically, and Lloyd throws you a smile over his shoulder. It’s cocky and hopeful all at once, like he knows the kiss wasn’t just for show.  
Maybe, just maybe, he’ll find a way to win you back.  
The weekend passes slowly without Victor. You spend the quiet hours tidying up, trying to distract yourself from the lingering thoughts of Lloyd’s kiss and the words he left unspoken. But no matter how hard you try, you can’t stop replaying his plea, “Let me prove it to you.”  
On Sunday evening, Lloyd drops Victor off as planned. Your son runs inside, chattering about their adventures at the park, the ice cream truck they chased down, and how Daddy let him drive his tiny remote-controlled car.  
Lloyd lingers at the door.  
“Can I come in for a minute?” he asks. His tone is careful, cautious, as though he’s testing the waters.  
You hesitate, but something about the vulnerability in his expression makes you step aside. “Just for a minute…” you say.  
Victor is already in the living room, playing with his toys, oblivious to the quiet tension between you and his father.  
Lloyd takes a deep breath, his hands stuffed into his pockets. “I’ve been thinking about what you said the other day. About things not magically going back to how they were.” He pauses, his gaze locking onto yours. “You’re right. They won’t. And they shouldn’t. Because I want things to be better than they were before.”  
You swallow hard, your heart beating faster, “Lloyd, I…”  
“Let me finish, Sugar.” His voice softens, and he steps closer, closing the distance between you. “I’m not asking you to forgive me overnight. I’m not asking you to forget what I did or the pain I caused. I just… I’m asking for a chance to show you that I’ve changed. That I’m trying to be the man you and Victor deserve.”  
Tears prick at the corners of your eyes, but you hold them back. “You think one kiss and a few sweet words will fix everything?”  
“No!” he says firmly. “But I think being here, every day, showing you how much I care… that might. I’m not giving up on us, Sugar. Not now, not ever.”  
Before you can respond, Victor runs up to the two of you, holding a drawing in his little hands. “Look! I made this at Daddy’s house!”  
The picture is messy but a clear stick-figure family of three, all holding hands. Above it, in Victor’s uneven handwriting, are the words, “My family.”
Your chest tightens, and you glance at Lloyd, whose eyes are filled with unshed tears. He kneels down to Victor’s level, gently ruffling his hair. “That’s a beautiful drawing, buddy.”  
Victor grins and turns to you. “Mommy, don’t you think we should be a family again? Daddy’s been so sad without you.”  
You look down at your son, then at Lloyd, who is watching you with a mixture of hope and fear.  
“I don’t know, Victor,” you say softly. “It’s… complicated.”  
“But you love Daddy, right?” Victor asks innocently, his big blue eyes staring up at you.  
You hesitate, the truth sitting heavy on your tongue. “Yes…” you finally admit. “I do.”  
Lloyd stands, his expression unreadable. “Sugar, I know I’ve made mistakes. And I’ll spend the rest of my life making up for them if you’ll let me.”  
Victor tugs on your hand, his face lighting up with excitement. “Please, Mommy? Let Daddy stay.”  
The weight of the moment presses down on you. Slowly, you nod, your voice barely above a whisper. “Okay. Let’s see where this goes.”  
Lloyd’s eyes widen in surprise, and then a rare, genuine smile spreads across his face. “You mean it?”  
“Yes,” you say, a small smile tugging at your lips. “But you’re on thin ice, Hansen.”  
He chuckles, his confidence returning. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, Sugar.”  
Victor cheers, throwing his arms around both of you, and for the first time in a long time, you feel a flicker of hope.  
Maybe, just maybe, you can be a family again.  
The days that follow are a whirlwind of emotions. Lloyd takes your cautious ‘okay’ as a challenge to prove himself, and he doesn’t waste any time.  
He starts small, picking Victor up from school, helping him with homework, and showing up at your door with dinner. Each time he’s around, you find yourself torn between wanting to push him away and feeling your walls crumble a little more.  
One evening, as you’re washing dishes, Lloyd appears beside you, drying a plate you hadn’t asked him to touch. “You know,” he says, his voice low and teasing, “we make a pretty good team.”  
“Lloyd, I don’t need your help.” you say, trying to focus on the sink.  
He leans in closer, his breath warm against your cheek. “You might not need it, but I like being here. With you.”  
Your face heats up, and you elbow him gently. “Back off, Hansen.”  
But instead of retreating, he grins and presses a kiss to your temple, quick and soft. You whirl on him, glaring. “What do you think you’re doing?”  
“Testing my limits,” he replies smugly, holding up his hands as if in surrender. “You’re adorable when you’re mad.”  
You roll your eyes, but the blush on your cheeks betrays you. He notices, of course, and his grin only grows wider.  
Lloyd’s efforts intensifies over the period.
Over the next few weeks, Lloyd becomes a constant presence in your life. He shows up unannounced with groceries, fixes the broken cabinet in your kitchen, and even surprises Victor with a mini soccer goal for the backyard.  
One afternoon, while Victor is napping, you find yourself sitting on the porch with Lloyd. He’s unusually quiet, his gaze fixed on the horizon.  
“Why are you doing all this?” you ask, breaking the silence.  
He looks at you, his expression sincere. “Because I lost you once, Sugar. And I’m not making that mistake again. You and Victor… you’re everything to me.”  
The raw honesty in his voice leaves you speechless. Before you can think of a response, he leans in, brushing his lips against yours. It’s soft, tentative, as if he’s giving you a chance to pull away. But you don’t.  
When he deepens the kiss, his hand rests gently on your cheek, you lose yourself for a moment, the familiar warmth of him overwhelming your senses.  
When you finally pull back, your heart is racing. “You’re impossible…” you mutter, your cheeks burning.  
“And you’re beautiful,” he replies, his lips quirking into a lopsided smile. 
Despite your reluctance to admit it, Lloyd’s persistence begins to wear down your defenses. He’s patient with Victor, kind to you, and relentless in his mission to win you back.  
One night, as you’re tucking Victor into bed, he grabs your hand. “Mommy, do you still love Daddy?”  
Caught off guard, you glance at Lloyd, who’s standing in the doorway, watching you with an unreadable expression.  
“I…” you start, unsure of how to answer.  
“I know you do,” Victor says confidently. “Because you smile more when he’s here.”  
Lloyd chuckles softly, stepping into the room. “Our kid is a great observer, you can’t hide anything from him.” he teases.  
“Go to sleep, Victor…” you say quickly, pressing a kiss to your son’s forehead before retreating to the living room.  
Lloyd follows you, closing the door behind him. “He’s not wrong, you know,” he says quietly.  
You sigh, turning to face him. “Lloyd, this isn’t easy for me. You broke my trust…”  
“And I’ll spend the rest of my life earning it back!” he interrupts, stepping closer. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved, and I’ll fight for you every day if that’s what it takes.”  
Tears well up in your eyes as you finally let the weight of his words sink in. “I’m scared…” you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.   
“I know,” he whispers, cupping your face in his hands. “But I’m here, Sugar. I’m not going anywhere.”  
The next morning, you wake up to the smell of pancakes. Victor’s laughter echoes from the kitchen, and when you walk in, you see Lloyd standing at the stove, flipping pancakes like he’s been doing it for years.  
“Morning, Sugar,” he says, flashing you a boyish grin. “Thought I’d make breakfast for my family.”  
You shake your head, but there’s no hiding the smile on your face.  
Later that day, as the three of you play soccer in the backyard, Victor pauses and looks up at you. “Does this mean Daddy’s staying forever?”  
You glance at Lloyd, who’s watching you with hopeful eyes. Slowly, you nod. “Yeah, buddy... I think it does.”  
Victor cheers, throwing his arms around both of you. Lloyd pulls you close, pressing a kiss to your hair.  
“I love you…” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion.  
And for the first time in a long time, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, you could have your happy ending after all. 
 
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kelpiemomma · 1 year ago
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I think I've become either incredibly jaded or living where I do has made me into a massive contrarian who has to argue everything
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solelifauna · 3 months ago
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Yandere Batfam & Neglected Reader Prt. 4
Unemployment was not on your bucket list.
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The rest of your shift dragged on, each minute weighed down by the persistent presence of Dick, Cass, and Damian. They loitered, the tension in the air thick enough to choke on. It was unnerving, knowing they were there—observing, calculating. You tried your best to ignore them, focusing on the customers and getting through the shift, but their eyes on you were impossible to shake.
Eventually, you glance at the clock. Your shift is finally coming to an end. A wave of relief washes over you. Soon, you’ll be out of here. You’ve been expecting a call from Alfred any minute now, either letting you know he’s “on the way” or already outside waiting for you. You clutch onto that thought, hoping for a quick getaway.
But that’s when you feel it, a firm hand on your shoulder. You flinch, startled, and whirl around to find Cassandra standing right behind you, her eyes sharp and her smile almost unsettling in its warmth.
“Y/N,” she said softly, her tone gentle but somehow–wrong.
“Can I–um–help you?” you ask, your voice betraying your unease. Cass is just as overtly intimidating as the others, if not more so. You know who trained her, you know what she's done, what she's capable of.
“We’ll take you home,” she says simply, the statement hanging in the air like an unbreakable decree.
You blink, not sure if you’ve heard her right. “What? I—Alfred’s picking me up,” you stammer, trying to figure out why the hell they’d want to take you home instead.
Cass’s smile doesn’t falter. “Change of plans.”
You glance past her toward the table where Dick and Damian are waiting. They’re already standing, Dick’s usual smirk plastered on his face, while Damian looks like he’s already irritated by the mere suggestion of you being in the same car as him.
“Uh..” You contemplate walking home, imagining the quiet and cool Gotham air being far more appealing than sharing a car with these three. Maybe it’s not that far to walk? Maybe you’ll survive the trip on foot? But you know better than to argue with them—not when Dick is involved.
With a resigned sigh, you nod. “Okay,  I guess. I still need to get my bike though.”
Cassandra hums in approval.
The walk to the car was stifling. Dick led the way, his usual playful grin in place, but there was an intensity behind it that made your skin crawl. Damian followed closely, his silence more oppressive than any words he could’ve said. When you reached the sleek black car, one of Bruce’s more extravagant vehicles, your hesitation grew, but there was no turning back now.
As you slip into the backseat, you find yourself next to Damian, who's already glaring out the window like you’re the most offensive thing in the car, and the leather seat that smells faintly of expensive cologne. Cass takes the passenger seat, her calm demeanor oddly comforting despite the situation, while Dick slides into the driver’s seat.
The car hums to life, and soon enough, you’re speeding through the streets of Gotham. The tension inside the vehicle is thick, almost unbearable. You stare out your window, watching the city blur by, trying your best to disappear into the seat.
“Y/N,” Dick’s voice broke the silence, far too casual for the tension in the car. “You didn’t tell us you were working at that cafe.”
You shrugged, not trusting yourself to say much. “Didn't think I needed to? Why does it matter?”
Dick’s eyes flicked to you in the mirror, a glint of something dark behind his seemingly easy going demeanor. “It seems as though there's a lot of things you haven't told us (Y/n), hmm?”
He just completely ignored your question, and like an idiot, you dignify his question with your own response.
“I don't know why you in particular care, considering you haven't bothered to in the past four years.” You remark, crossing your arms. 
Dicks smile only widened as he cooed at your response. “Oh I don't care (Y/n), but you can't just do whatever you want, right? Your last name’s still Wayne last time I checked, do you know what that means?”
His eyes flicker to you, staring at you through the rear view mirror. You just shrug nervously, you had no idea where he was going with this.
“It means you’re not allowed to just fuck off and do whatever you want. What happens when you’re working and a rouge or random criminal recognizes you? It’ll be our job to drag you back.” He says smiling all the while. Dick doesn't really curse, not like this anyways, and it's starting to scare you. 
There was something sinister beneath his seemingly friendly demeanor. The way he was talking about you, it made you feel more like a possession than a person. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, eyes flicking to Damian and Cassandra. None of them seemed to be fazed by Dick's words. It was like they all understood something you didn't.
"Look," you muttered, "I just needed the job, okay? I didn’t think it was a big deal."
He just nods, “Which is why you'll be putting in your two week’s notice.”
Hold the phone.
“I'm sorry what?”
“I'm sure I spoke clearly, didn't i?”
“I'm–I'm not quitting my job.”
“Yes you are. In fact, you're going to call your boss and let them know right now.”
“You’re fucking crazy if you thin–”
“I'm not asking (Y/n).” He says, a certain edge to his voice. “Call your boss.”
You’re scared. You don't know why he’s doing this. Shaking, you pull out your phone, staring at the screen as if it could somehow save you from this situation. You know they won’t let you get out of this. Not with the way Dick’s smile is hovering on the edge of something dangerous, not with Damian’s silent approval and Cassandra’s eerie calm. The power dynamic is suffocating—this isn’t a request; it’s an order.
“Call,” Dick says again, his voice now a warning.
You swallow hard, your fingers trembling as you scroll to your boss’s number. You want to refuse, you want to stand your ground, but the fear of what would happen if you did keeps your rebellion at bay. You press the call button, and the phone rings in your ear.
“Hello?” your boss answers, their voice friendly and unsuspecting.
“Hey Daniel, it’s Y/N,” you say, your voice shaking. “I—I’m sorry, but I have to put in my two weeks’ notice. I—uh, I can’t work here anymore.”
There’s a pause on the other end. “What? Y/N, is everything okay?”
No. “Yeah, it’s fine,” you lie. “I just… something came up, and I can’t keep the job.”
Your boss hesitates, clearly concerned. “Are you sure? If this is about needing time off, we can work something out—”
“No, I’m sure,” you cut them off, glancing at the rearview mirror, where Dick’s eyes are still watching you with that unsettling intensity. “I have to go. I’m sorry.”
You hang up before they can ask more questions. There’s a sick feeling in your stomach, like you’ve just lost something.
Dick hums in approval. “Good. That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
You don’t respond. You’re too numb, too angry to even find the words to fight back. The rest of the car ride is silent. When you finally arrive back at the manor, you slip out of the car without a word, making a beeline for your room. You can hear them behind you, talking quietly amongst themselves, but you don’t care. You just need to be alone.
The worst part was, you didn't even get to go back for your bike. Gotham wasn't exactly known for its secure parking spaces, especially for a bike left unattended for hours. By now, it was probably stolen or stripped for parts. Another loss to add to the growing list.
You collapsed onto your bed after a long, hot shower, letting the steam wash away the dried coffee and lingering bitterness of the day. The frustration and humiliation clung to you, but you tried to push it all aside as you buried yourself in mundane distractions. Homework? Done, though half-heartedly. Your phone? A welcome relief, a way to escape the reality of what your life had become.
The phone call with your friends was a lifeline. You started by relaying the bizarre events of your day—Dick showing up at your workplace, forcing you to quit, the awful encounter with the Karen who’d thrown coffee in your face. Arya and Ethan were outraged on your behalf, their voices rising with indignation as they expressed disbelief at how ridiculous your life had become.
“What is wrong with him?” Arya had exclaimed after you explained how Dick had basically forced you to quit. “It’s like he gets off on controlling you.”
Ethan chimed in, his voice laced with sarcasm. “It’s the Wayne family, what do you expect? They think the world revolves around them.”
The conversation shifted to lighter topics eventually, giving you a break from the heavy reality of your situation. Arya’s excitement over the girl she liked responding to her Instagram story was a welcome distraction. She went on a rant about how this girl was clearly the one, and you and Ethan couldn’t help but exchange amused glances over the phone. Arya’s giddiness was infectious, and soon the three of you were laughing—deep, real laughter that made you momentarily forget about everything.
But, as with all good things, the fun came to an end with a knock at your door. You sighed heavily, already knowing what was coming.
"Master (Y/n), it’s time for dinner."
The familiar voice of Alfred carried through the door, his polite yet firm tone unmistakable. You groaned, dragging yourself off the bed with all the enthusiasm of someone heading toward their own execution. Dinner meant facing Dick, and after the day you'd had, that was the last thing you wanted to deal with.
You swung open the door, forcing a smile for Alfred, though you knew he could see right through it. "Hey Alfie, how was today?"
Alfred smiled, ever the picture of calm. "All good in a day's work, Master (Y/n). Might I inquire how work today was?"
You couldn’t help but grimace at the mention of work. "It... it was alright," you said, though the weight of your words made it clear that was a lie. Alfred’s raised brow told you he wasn’t fooled.
"Well," you sighed, the reality sinking in further as you spoke, "it doesn’t matter anymore anyways. I quit today."
Alfred’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. "But my dear, I thought you adored working there? Whatever did happen?"
You couldn’t hold back the bitterness in your voice as you answered, "Dick."
Alfred’s eyes softened with understanding, and the sympathy in his gaze was almost too much to bear. "Ah, I see. I’m sorry you’ve had to do so," he said, and you could tell he genuinely meant it.
"It’s not your fault, Alfie," you replied, feeling a pang of guilt for dragging him into your mess. "Which is why I wanted to ask if I could have dinner in my room today? I don’t think I’ll be able to stay civil with Dick sitting there."
Alfred gave you a sad smile, one that only deepened the dread in your chest. "Usually, it would be more than allowed," he began, his voice gentle, "however, today your father has requested that you attend dinner no matter what."
Your heart sank. "What?"
"Yes," Alfred said with a hint of regret in his voice. "Unfortunately, you don’t have much of a choice today, my dear."
You stared at Alfred, dumbstruck. Since when did Bruce care whether or not you were at dinner? He barely acknowledged your presence most of the time, and now suddenly it was a demand?
Alfred gave you one last apologetic look before he turned to leave, his footsteps fading down the hall. You stood frozen in place, disbelief washing over you.
What the actual fuck is happening?
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joelscurls · 1 year ago
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best kept secret
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pairing: dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader
words: 6.7k
summary: In an attempt to keep your relationship secret, Joel agrees to a blind date set up by his best friend / your father. You don't take it well.
warnings: 18+ minors dni, pre-outbreak, age gap (reader is in her early 20s, Joel is 36), secret relationship, angst, explicit smut, oral (f!receiving), unprotected piv, semi-public sex, car sex, creampie, some fluff; lmk if I missed anything!
a/n: so sorry it took me almost a month to post something new ffs - life got busy and my inspiration simultaneously disappeared. but we're back, baby! anyway, dbf!joel owns my ass, so here's my rendition of him. as always, ty to my baby @javisashtray for reading this over for me and helping me through the creative process <3
Joel’s bedroom window offers a perfect view of the sunrise; of shy, pink light creeping over treetops and the roof of your dad’s house across the street.
It’s gorgeous — breathtaking, even — maybe because you can count on one hand the number of times you’ve actually seen the crest of morning. You’re far more privy to late nights and sleeping in as long as you can push it,  never been one to be up with the lark, so to speak.
You don’t mind the early wakeup call, though, not when it’s this: Joel’s head tucked between your thighs, his tongue rolling lazily over your clit, your eyes still adjusting to the light as he spreads you open for him.
He’s humming against you, his coarse beard tickling soft skin, thumbs dug into muscle to hold you in place as your back bows reflexively off the mattress. He looks so sweet like this, so eager to please, staring up at you with blown pupils.
“C’mon baby,” he purrs. “Just gimme one before you go.”
They’re the first words he’s said all morning, the first thought that’s necessitated utterance. His voice is hoarse and deep and drips honey-sweet at your core. 
Even so, despite how badly you want to — because you always want Joel’s mouth on you — you’re not sure you can. 
Because you need to get home before Denise next door leaves for her early shift. Before Susan a few houses down takes her dog out for a walk.
Before the neighborhood wakes and somebody sees you leaving Joel Miller’s house. Or worse, before your dad catches you slipping into the house in yesterday’s clothes, your car in the driveway still cold.
But with another experimental flick of Joel’s tongue, you forget all that, a content little sigh slipping past your parted lips, betraying you.
Just one, you tell yourself, and then you’ll head out.
“Fuck, okay — yeah,” you breathe, twisting your fingers into the roots of his curls.
With your permission, he buries his nose in your mound. Licks at you again — with more purpose, this time. One long, drawn out lap followed by another.  
He’s so gentle with you, so careful, caressing your folds with his tongue like they’re made of paper. It’s a dizzying juxtaposition to the way he laid you down last night and fucked you, teeth scraping your neck and cock bruising your cervix.
You’re still sore, your walls tender where he stretched them, but your pussy is drooling nonetheless, surely making a mess of the bedsheets underneath you.
Because you’re insatiable when it comes to Joel. 
For the past few weeks, since the first time you’d found yourself in his bed, you’ve craved him. Regardless of how sated he’s left you each and every time, you’ve needed more. 
It’s dangerous and stupid and undeniably wrong, having a fling with your dad’s best-friend. But you’re finding it difficult to consider the morality of it all when just his tongue makes you come harder than any other man’s cock ever has. 
That tongue, now dipping into your apex, drawing more slick out of you as his thumb finds your swollen clit — It’s overwhelming how good it feels, how good he is at this.
He’s bringing you to the edge languidly, savoring the taste of you, the feel of your silky flesh. It’s like he doesn’t want this to be over, needs to stretch the moment as far as it’ll go, milk every last second before you slip from his grasp.
But it’s going to end soon; it’s inevitable with the way he’s laving your pussy, the crushed velvet of his tongue gliding through your folds so wet and warm. Your orgasm is building, and you’re powerless to stave it off any longer.
“Joel,” you warn, his name a high-pitched whine. 
“Shh, I know babygirl; it’s okay.” 
Two of his fingers hook at your entrance and push in, pacifying you as his thumb continues working your clit. “I got you. Let go for me, sweetheart.”
The soothe of his voice floods your senses like nitrous; renders your body loose and your head foggy. You come apart with a string of shattered breaths, eyes rolled back and fingers twisted into the duvet.
Joel talks you through it: that’s it, pretty girl; so good for me; always so good for me, and though he sounds so far away, his words are the only thing keeping you tethered to reality.
The world comes back into view slowly. Air settles in your lungs. And you can’t help but laugh at how fucked-out you feel when you peer down at Joel, his gaze already locked on you, expectantly.
“Okay?” he asks, rubbing at your inner thigh.
“Yeah,” you exhale, corners of your lips pulling taut. “More than okay.”
He smiles back at you. Props himself up with hands planted either side of you on the mattress and hovers over your feeble form.
“Good,” he whispers, dipping his head down to kiss your forehead, your nose, your mouth. He licks into you, letting you taste yourself on him — a little sweet, a little bitter — and his lips are so soft that you nearly melt. “Did so good, angel.” 
You want nothing more than to spend all day in this bed with him. Return the favor a few times over. Learn what he looks like in the afternoon sun against the backdrop of navy blue sheets. What he tastes like after his coffee rather than before.
“I don’t want to leave,” you admit against his mouth and he frowns, taking one of your hands in his. He presses a kiss to each of your knuckles, one by one, his eyes never straying from yours.
“I don’t want you to either, darlin’. But you can come back tonight, yeah?”
Tonight. Hours away. A whole day between now and then. But it’ll have to do. 
“Tonight,” you repeat. Solidify it. 
You slink home just as the street lights dim.
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The house is quiet when you enter, apart from the incessant ticking of the grandmother clock in the living room. It sets off a throbbing in your head, a dull pang right at the front of your skull that you massage with two fingers as you ascend the stairs.
You move cautiously up each step, wincing at every creak of old wood. It must take minutes to reach the second-floor landing, and then you’re tiptoeing past your father’s room, listening for signs of sleep behind the seal of his door. Sure enough, you catch it, a single, drawn-out snore, loud enough that you let your feet fall, shuffling the rest of the way to the bathroom across the hall.
You immediately crank the shower on, climbing in as soon as you see steam. Lathering your skin with citrus-scented body wash, the smell of sex washes off your body and down the drain.
The warm water soothes your sore muscles; bittersweet relief. You stand there until the stream grows icy, stepping out and toweling yourself off just as you hear the familiar blare of your dad’s alarm on the other side of the wall.
By the time you’ve dressed and made your way downstairs, he’s already in the kitchen, nursing a cup of coffee with his back to you. 
Sink empty, counters borderline sparkling, a coaster tucked under his warm mug — your father is a neat man. He does not take kindly to mess.
God forbid, anybody disrupt the sacred balance of his home; move something and forget to put it back, break something of his that should be kept intact.
“Hey.”
“Hey, kiddo,” he yawns. Turns to face you. “You were up early. Heard the shower going.”
“Couldn’t sleep,” you lie.
“Something on your mind?”
Heat blooms across your chest and up your neck. There’s no way he knows — you’ve been far too careful. Still, you’re on edge, and the question lodges itself between your ribs uncomfortably as you frantically search for an answer.
“Uh, n-no,” you stutter. “Just work stuff, I guess.”
He seems to buy it, reaching for the percolator and re-filling his mug with a sigh, “Just gotta give it time. You only just started. Plus, it’s your first job out of school. They don’t expect you to know it all right away.”
It’s good advice, if not misguided. You nod as if you’re absorbing it, taking it straight to heart. As if your mind isn’t preoccupied.
You grab a mug from the cabinet. Fill it with coffee and creamer. Perch yourself at the breakfast table and take a slow, steadying sip.
The caffeine has just about seeped into your bloodstream when-
-there’s a knock at the door.
Your dad shoots you a puzzled look, one which you immediately return. Who could that be, so early on a Wednesday morning?
And when he pushes open the door to reveal none other than Joel, you just about fall out of your chair. Your nails absentmindedly dig into the wood of the table in an attempt to brace yourself.
“Oh, buddy — hey! Come on in,” your dad says, patting him on the back as he steps over the threshold. “Wasn’t expecting you.”
You grasp the handle of your mug like a lifeline. For a fleeting moment, you worry the ceramic will shatter in your hands.
Joel is dressed — blue cotton t-shirt covering his broad back and the deep, red scratches you left there when you dug your nails into skin, your legs hiked over his hips and your face tucked into his chest.
The pair of boxers peeking over the waistband of his jeans are different from the ones you pulled off of him last night, the ones he shimmied back into before you slept cradled in his arms.
He’s a different Joel here, now — your father’s friend, your neighbor — not the man who breaks you down with his tongue or the one who calls you his good girl while you take his entire, throbbing length. 
No, this Joel, standing in your kitchen in the presence of your father, has never betrayed him. Hasn’t tasted his friend’s daughter or felt the tight embrace of her wet, warm cunt around his cock. This Joel is reliable, honest, not one to do harm.
You do not desire this Joel, cannot. You must look at him with apathetic eyes. Must keep the boat of your longing at bay. 
Easier said than done. It’s as if your desire for him is a feral beast, fed by his touch and left starving in its wake. You feel like you’ve just run a marathon, sweat beading at your collar as you not-so-subtly follow the subconscious flex of his hands, the bunching of fabric over his biceps.
His voice bounces off the backsplash, and your fingers tighten around the handle of your mug.
“Yeah, I uh — I went to make myself coffee and realized I was out. Was hopin’ you might have some to spare?”
He can’t be serious. He came over for coffee? He couldn’t get some on the road?
“I’m afraid she took the last of it,” your dad’s eyes point to you, and you ignore the burn of Joel’s gaze when his follow.
“Ahh,” he says. “‘ts okay. I’ll grab some on my way in.” 
His fingers taptaptap on the edge of the countertop, bottom lip tucked between his teeth like there’s something else. Another reason he came here.
And then you spot it — your wallet, dark red leather, poking out the top of Joel’s back pocket. 
You must’ve left it in his room before you hurried home. Somewhere amongst the mess of trinkets and trash on his dresser. You half-remember dropping it there last night as he’d kneeled in front of you and peppered kisses up the length of your leg.
Thankfully, your dad is oblivious as ever, giving Joel the perfect opportunity to inconspicuously slip you your wallet when he turns around and crosses the kitchen, placing his empty mug in the sink. 
Joel sidesteps once, twice, extending his arm and snapping it back as soon as you have the wallet in your grasp.
Your father clears his throat. Spins to find Joel exactly where he was. “I’ve been thinking,” he starts, wrestling a slice of bread out of the bag and dropping it into the toaster, “I gotta set you up with this co-worker of mine, Deb.”
Joel freezes. You watch as the color drains from his face and his large hand anxiously cards through dark curls. You’re pretty sure you freeze too, breath caught somewhere in your throat until your dad turns to you and you remember to exhale. 
“You know Deb, right, honey?” he asks. You mentally flick through the rolodex of your dad’s coworkers. 
There’s Leanne, tall redhead, hosted a potluck a few months back at which you tasted the worst mac & cheese you’ve ever had. And Barbara from accounting, who he got into a heated argument with over who makes the best BBQ in the city. You only remember her name because he hadn’t shut up about how wrong her opinion was for a full week. 
This woman actually thinks the Smoke Shop has got better ribs than Lou’s. I said to her, Barbara, your taste buds must be absolutely torched.
But Deb? You don’t recall a Deb. Still, you’re pretty sure you hate her, just in hearing her name in this context. 
You shake your head, no. 
“Well, I guess you haven’t seen her in a while. She was there that day I brought you into the office.”
“When I was ten?” you retort. 
“Yeah, I guess it was that long ago, huh?”
You shrug. He returns his attention to Joel. “Anyway, Deb – she’s around your age, just got divorced about a year back, and she’s a real nice woman. I think you two would really hit it off.”
“Is that so?” Joel replies. You swear his voice wavers. If your dad notices, he doesn’t say anything.
“You’ll like her Joel, I promise. I mean, when’s the last time you went out with a nice lady? Not since – what was her name — Jean? And if things were going well with her, I’d hope you’d tell your old friend.” The toaster pops, and he retrieves his slice of toast. Grabs a butter knife from the utensil drawer.  
“No, I ain’t seeing Jean,” Joel sighs. Flashes you an apologetic glance as your dad slathers his toast in artificial purple jam, blissfully unaware.
“Well, you gotta get back out there!” 
Joel’s gaze rolls to the ceiling. “I don’t know – I’m just not real interested in datin’ right now.”
You exhale, then — a quiet declaration of relief that seems to go unnoticed — unperturbed even when your dad continues his pitch. 
I’ve known this woman for years Joel, I’m telling you, the two of you’d be the perfect match; she’s a looker too, real pretty.
Ew. Tuning him out, you check the clock, find that you only have a few minutes before you need to get going. You stand from the table and make your way toward the sink with your now-empty coffee mug in hand.
Would I ever lead you astray? your dad is asking just as you brush past Joel. His hand, idle by his side, catches the fabric of your blouse and you have to fight to ignore the pinprick of electricity it ignites under your skin.
“No, I know,” Joel grumbles. “I trust your judgment ‘n all, ‘ts just-”
“Will you just give her a chance?”
“Jesus; fine.”
The mug slips from your grip, falls into the sink with a clang.
Your dad glares at you, expression softening only when you gesture to the still-intact ceramic lying on its side in the basin.
He’s quickly distracted, then, jotting a series of numbers down onto a scrap of notebook paper, the blue ink pressed in so hard that it’s beginning to bleed through. 
“Atta boy,” he drawls, sliding it across the counter. Joel pinches it between two fingers, folds the paper without looking at it and stuffs it into his front pocket. 
“Promise you’ll give her a call tonight? I may or may not have already talked you up, and I need to know you’re not gonna make me look bad here.”
Joel has to see you staring at him out of the corner of his eye. He must. If looks could kill, he’d be six feet under already. But he’s refusing to meet your gaze, eyes glued to the cabinet directly in front of him as he nods. “Yeah, I’ll call her tonight,” he says, a small, unconvincing smile pulling at the corner of his lips. 
He’s actually agreeing to this?
You need to get out of here before you say something rash.
The anger bubbles in you slowly, then all at once, threatening to boil over as you slip on your shoes and sling your bag over your shoulder. 
Marching toward the door, you offer a half-hearted bye, not bothering to look back before you leave.
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The office is already milling with people by the time you stroll in, ten minutes late. 
The conversation between Joel and your dad is still running laps in your head as you sneak past your boss’s door.
It sticks there through the morning and well into the afternoon, your dad’s words an incessant earworm: I think you two would really hit it off.
The thing is — you can’t blame Joel for saying yes to the setup. Not really. Your situation is complicated, messy, bound to end badly.
Maybe he’d be happier with Deb. 
They could take walks together, stroll through the grocery store or down the street  hand-in-hand. Throw dinner parties and shamelessly gush about their relationship to their friends. All without fear of being caught doing something wrong.
Because that’s what this is, you and Joel — it’s wrong. Not like you weren’t already well aware of that. Leave it to some woman you’ve never met to rub it in.
The day passes infuriatingly slow.
The pile of emails in your inbox only grows larger by the time you’re due to clock out, stack of reports on your desk barely touched. You wince when your boss stops by your cubicle on her way out, eager for an update.
“Sorry, Linda; a couple of these were more time-consuming than I’d hoped,” you lie. But you can tell she doesn’t buy it, not one bit, her expression souring as you shuffle through papers.
“I need these done by the end of the week, no matter what.”
“Of course,” you mutter, face heating with embarrassment. “I’ll get them done and on your desk by Friday.”
“Thanks.” Her heels are already clacking on tile when you open your mouth to apologize again, your sorry lost to the ether.
You gather your things and scramble to your feet as soon as she’s out of view, not sticking around to watch your computer power down. By the time you get to your car, Joel’s number is already dialed on your phone.
He picks up after two rings.
“Darlin’ — are you okay?”
It’s admittedly uncharacteristic for you to call him so early. You usually wait until after dark, when you’ve both retreated to your respective bedrooms, away from listening ears.
But this can’t wait. It’s been eating at you all day, digging into your work. If you don’t talk to him about it, you’re going to end up unemployed. You don’t bother to ask if he’s still on the job site, around other people. “You’re going on this date.” It’s not a question. More of an accusation.
“Baby,” he sighs. You try your best to ignore his molasses drawl and the way it seeps into your chest. 
“Why didn’t you say no?” 
“How could I?” he groans. “There’s your dad, askin’ me if I’m seein’ someone, sayin’ he’s already told this lady about me – what am I supposed to say?”
“I don’t know.” Your voice comes out a whine. “Make something up. Tell him you’ve taken a vow of celibacy.”
He laughs, low and breathy on the other end. “Yeah, baby. Think he’d believe that one, f’sure.”
“Fuck,” you huff. “I just— I don’t-“
You want to tell him not to go. To cancel. Fake his own death. Do whatever it takes to get out of this. But you have no right, not really. The two of you aren’t dating. You don’t have any control over what he does or who he sees. And you don’t want that, no. You just want him to choose you.
“I don’t wanna go, darlin’. I really don’t. But if I do this, I think it’ll get him off my back for a while. He won’t have a reason to suspect that I’m foolin’ around with his daughter.”
Fooling around. His phrasing is a metaphorical punch in the gut.
It’s not exactly a lie. You haven’t put a label on this thing, whatever it is. It’s been purely physical: lips slotted to lips, tongues pressed together, swapped sweat and saliva. But hearing it reduced to two words, words with such a casual connotation — as if you haven’t been driven by overwhelming desire — makes your stomach churn.
Joel doesn’t seem to clock it when you go quiet, a cocktail of rage and sorrow sloshing around your insides. “It’s for the best,” he adds, a shot of hard, burning liquor. 
“Yeah,” you say defeatedly. Choke back the pathetic tears that creep up your throat. “For the best.”
He ends the call with the excuse of bad cell reception. Promises to talk to you later. You’re not sure that you believe him.
The phrase fooling around curls up in your head, a wet dog, its fur dripping into the crevices of your rattled brain the entire drive home.
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You dodge Joel’s calls for the remainder of the week.
There’s no use in talking to him when you have nothing to say, when you know any words you attempt will be overtaken by tears.
Even so, it doesn’t stop him from trying. His number lights up the screen of your phone at least twice a day.
He leaves voicemails that you do not listen to. You can’t. The last thing you need is his syruppy drawl in your ear. You’ll break; you know you will.
So instead, you delete them. Rid yourself of temptation.
But you still ache for him — a devastating truth. You lumber through the days, bones heavy with hurt. Find yourself kept up at night by thoughts of Joel and the infuriatingly soothing timbre of his voice, the intoxicating callous of his fingertips against your soft skin. 
It’s a lonely thing, yearning for Joel Miller.
On Friday, your father beams at the dinner table. He’s grinning like a child as he stuffs a forkful of rice into his mouth.
“Joel and Deb’s date is tomorrow,” he says. “Think they’ll really hit it off, don’t you?”
You’re dumbfounded for a long moment — can’t believe that this is your life now: being asked about your thoughts on Joel and the ever-elusive Deb as a couple. When it takes too long for you to answer, your father’s fork stills pointedly on his plate, and you sputter.
“Oh! I mean, I don’t know. Like I said, I don’t remember Deb.” You can’t help your condescending tone. Your dad doesn’t seem to catch it anyway. 
“Well,” he says, “I think they’ll be a match. Hoping so, anyway. The man has been such a hermit lately — maybe if he has a lady, he’ll get out more!”
“You sound real excited,” you grumble. Stab four peas on the prongs of your fork.
“It is exciting. I’ve never set anyone up before. And the best part is, the place they’re going to — the Tavern — it’s got rooms you can rent out for wedding receptions. Just imagine if down the line, they got mar-“
“Dad,” you stop him. You think you’ll be physically sick if you let him finish that sentence. “Sorry, I just — I’m really tired, all of a sudden. I think I’m going to head to bed early.”
It’s not a complete lie. You’re emotionally exhausted as a result of the past couple days. Sleep sounds like a much-needed, blissful escape right now.
Your dad doesn’t question you. He just nods. Swipes your plate from in front of you and brings it to the sink along with his.
Of course, you find it impossible to actually drift off that night. Tossing and turning, you battle the glaring urge to get up, slink into the home-office and look up directions to the Tavern. 
Not that you’re planning to go there anytime soon — you’re just curious. That’s all. 
Around midnight, you give up, pad down the hallway and into the room parallel yours. The computer dials up slowly, and you chew your bottom lip as you wait. 
You snatch a piece of paper from the printer and a pen from the #1 Dad mug that sits next to the monitor. Click on the internet icon and type the words into the search bar.
This is definitely a bad idea. Maybe the worst you’ve had in a while.
You jot the address down anyway.
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Downtown Austin is buzzing with life. 
Patrons spilling out of bars, tourists striding down the street in their brand new Stetsons – it almost distracts you from the task at hand. 
At just past seven, you’d told your dad you were going out, meeting a friend for drinks. He’d been a bit taken aback, seeing as you’re not very social these days, but he’d seemed happy. Relieved. 
That’s not what you’re doing, of course.
No – in reality, you’re turning into the parking lot attached to the Tavern. It’s packed to the brim with cars, but you still manage to find Joel’s truck, its license plate number burned into the back of your mind after countless mornings of absently reading it as you snuck past.
It’s idle and empty when you inch by, and even though you knew he’d be here, on this date, your heart still sinks. Because maybe a tiny part of you had hoped he’d stand Deb up. 
You should leave. It was stupid to come here in the first place. What are you going to do — storm inside and demand that he leave with you?
You consider it for half a second, groaning when you realize how pitiful you are. Defeated, you swing your car into a spot at the back, facing the building, and shift it into park. You hug the steering wheel dejectedly.
From here, you have a straight-shot view of the restaurant’s entrance, a set of double doors at the side of the building. Groups spill out every so often, every pair that emerges causing your back to arch reflexively.
Joel and Deb are probably discussing their interests right now, bonding over a shared connection with your dad. You can vividly picture the smile likely plastered across his face — the same one you’ve elicited with sweet filth whispered in his ear.
And you’re here, sitting in your running car, watching the door. Your pulse thumps obnoxiously loud in your ears.
Minutes pass like molasses, slow and thick. You watch the clock on the car radio obsessively, betting with yourself on what time they’ll leave. After thirty minutes of nothing, you’re convinced that they’re going to close the place out.
But then the door opens again, and you straighten up, immediately met with the sight of Joel and Deb. 
She’s talking animatedly, eyes widening every few words, blonde hair wafting around her narrow face. It’s undeniable that she’s stunning, even from far away; possesses the kind of beauty you see on magazine covers in line at the grocery store. The jealousy that pools in your gut burns like acetone in an open wound.
She takes his arm as they walk toward the parking lot, and he lets her, despite the rest of his body appearing strangely rigid.
You wonder if he’ll take her home. Lead her to his truck, help her up the step to the passenger seat and sneak a look at her ass under her dress before shutting the door. If they’ll leave her car in the lot for the night, come back to retrieve it in the morning once he’s helped her forget about her loser ex-husband; let the scent of her perfume seep into the bed sheets to cover up yours.
But he doesn’t lead her to his truck. You watch as they unexpectedly turn down a row of cars, disappearing from your view completely, his arm still locked with hers. 
He could still kiss her. Press her against the car. Promise her that he’ll call — and he will, first thing tomorrow. He’s probably just being a real gentleman. Treating her like a woman he might want to marry someday. 
Maybe he knows, after just one date, that she’s his soulmate. He’ll buy the ring in a couple weeks. They’ll be engaged in a month’s time, and he’ll say he just couldn’t wait any longer. 
She’s the one thing I’ve been missing.
You stew in the agonizing unknown for what feels like hours before Joel materializes once again, backside illuminated by headlights as he strides toward his truck.
And then — he stops. You see the exact moment he notices your car in the parking lot, his eyebrows threading together and his hands splaying over his hips.
He’s staring directly through the windshield. At you.
Fuck.
He takes a few slow steps. Stops in front of the hood. Narrows his eyes and flexes his jaw.
With a deep breath, you unlock the doors. Gesture for him to get in the passenger side. 
He immediately rounds the car, prying the door open and climbing inside just as a SUV pulls out the row he and Deb had walked down. 
The door slams when he yanks it closed. The sound echoes through the cab of the car.
“You wanna fuckin’ explain what you’re doin’ here?” he snaps. You’re afraid to look him in the eye, embarrassment and now, anger, spooling hot behind your ears.
You know you’re in the wrong. You shouldn’t have followed him. But does he have to be so hostile?
When your gaze finally meets his, he looks — distraught — jaw clenched and lips set in a straight line. His fingers absently dig into denim-covered thighs.
“I don’t know,” you mumble, “I just wanted to see how you were with her.” And it’s the truth; not one you want to be admitting right now, to him, but it’s the truth nonetheless.
“Doesn’t give you the right to spy on me.”
“So what was I supposed to do? Sit at home and mope while the guy I was seeing is on a date with someone else? Oh no, I’m sorry,” you throw your hands up, form air quotes with your fingers, “the guy I was fooling around with.”
This seems to strike a nerve. His jaw twitches, and his fingers still on his lap.
“It wasn’t like that,” he grits
“No? Isn’t that all this was to you: fooling around?”
There’s a beat. Joel sighs. 
“No — fuck, no. Of course not.”
His expression softens. A crack in solid stone. “I tried callin’ you,” he says, voice barely above a whisper.
“I know,” you admit.
He nods. Another beat.
“Did you kiss her?” you ask.
“No.” He says it with intent, with promise, eyes firmly locked on yours now. 
Your mouth goes dry.
“No?”
“No,” he repeats. “I didn’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I didn’t want to.”
“You don’t want her?” 
“No,” he says flatly, his pupils bulging in the lamplight, black bleeding into the brown of his irises. “I don’t want her.” 
“Why not?” 
He leans forward. His weight presses into the center console and his breath fans your face — warm, tinged with the scent of cheap beer.
“I don’t want her,” he says, voice an octave lower, “because I want you. I thought you knew that?” 
The radio drones between the two of you, some classic rock song you think you recognize flitting through the speaker. Your pulse beats staccato in your throat, off tempo.
“You want me?” you ask, a little breathless, and the next words you say are beyond dumb, beyond reckless, but you say them anyway. “Prove it.”
Joel doesn’t hesitate. He closes the slight distance between you and kisses you, hard, his tongue frantically sliding against yours through parted lips.
It’s sloppy, and desperate, and you feel drunk on the taste of him, on longing laced with carnal need. He’s groaning into your mouth, grabbing your head with both hands, burying his fingers in your hair — as if he can’t get close enough, as if he’ll only be satisfied once he’s swallowed you whole. You’re pretty sure you want him to.
Your hands move frantically to his t-shirt, then, bunch into the fabric and pull. You need to feel the skin underneath, need to rove your hands along his bare chest. He accommodates, tugging the shirt by the back of the collar, lips separating from yours ever-so-briefly to bring it over his head and toss it onto the backseat. 
And then he’s back on you, licking into your mouth again, eliciting a whimper from you when his hand wraps around the side of your throat, just under your jaw. 
Your palms splay across his torso, wander over warm, golden skin. You’ve missed this, god, you’ve missed this — but it’s still not enough. You need to feel more of him. In your mouth, in your hand, in your cunt — you’re not picky. Just need him in whatever way he’ll provide.
“Joel,” you whimper into his mouth, fingers winding around his bicep. 
He pulls back. Peers at you through hooded eyes. “What is it, baby?” he asks through labored breaths. 
“Need you — please.”
He immediately unbuckles your seatbelt. Lowers his seat back and manhandles you onto his lap. You go easily; slot yourself to him with legs folded on either side of his thighs. 
Wrapping your arms around the back of his neck, you grind down into his lap. His cock strains against denim underneath you. He groans when you swivel your hips and brush the heft of it again with your clothed heat.
“You gonna let me fuck you?” he asks into your mouth, his forehead pressed to yours.
Your breath catches. 
You know what he’s really asking: are you going to  let him fuck you here, in the parking lot of a public establishment, where anybody could see?
But you don’t care. In fact, you’re way past caring, the emptiness of your cunt too painful to ignore any longer. Let them watch him take what’s his.
You nod frantically. “Yes,” you pant. “Please.”
Joel nods too, as if he’s accepting his fate. He’s going to fuck his friend’s daughter in the passenger seat of her car. There’s no way around it — not when you’re begging for it. He’s going to give you what you need.
“Okay,” he soothes, “I got you baby.” 
He helps you out of your pants, then; clumsily maneuvers them down and off your legs along with your panties and tosses them aimlessly into the back.
He doesn’t bother to take his jeans off. Lets you unzip them and pop the button open, your nimble fingers making quick work of it. And then you’re pulling his cock out of his boxers, stiff and leaking in your grasp.
You steady yourself with hands on his shoulders just as he begins to pepper placating kisses along your neck. “Go ahead baby,” he whispers into your ear. “Take it; it’s yours.”
His head falls back against the seat as you stroke him a few times and line his cock up with your dripping entrance, his hands clasped around your waist. 
You sink down slowly, savoring every inch of him as he burrows in deeper. He’s so thick, stretching you like it’s the first time again, your walls fluttering as they relax around his cock.
“Fuck,” Joel slurs, fingers digging into your skin impatiently when you still, fully seated on him.
“Gotta move baby — please move.”
He’s so fucking deep, though, his cockhead bumping your cervix, and your entire body feels gelatinous atop him. A cloying sort of heat hangs around your head. You swivel your hips weakly, your forehead falling to rest on his with a heavy sigh.
Joel is happy to take control, bucking up into you so hard you see stars. You can’t suppress the string of moans that spill from your mouth, and Joel doesn’t seem to mind. He’s just as loud, anyway, his broken sounds bleeding into yours, bouncing off glass and leather.
Neither of you can muster an actual word, though, not with him rutting up into you, sheathing himself in your pussy over and over again. He’s relentlessly hitting that spot — the one that has you practically clinging to him for dear life. 
It’s approaching too quickly; he’s going to make you come.
One of your hands flies to the roof of the car in an attempt to brace yourself, flat palm pressing into it so hard you worry it’ll pop. 
Joel takes the opportunity to drag you down in his lap, spearing you on his cock, and the sudden change in angle makes you cry out.
“Oh f— ahh, oh my—“
“That’s it,” he coos, “you got it, babygirl.”
His words tip you over the edge, your entire body locking up as you gush around him. You’re wetting his lap, slick splattering his thighs, and he loves it, his fervid moan telling you so.
His movements begin to falter then, hips stuttering underneath you as he chases his own high.
“Cmon, baby,” you goad, “please fill me up.”
He grunts when he spills inside, his face nestling in your chest, heaving as he works through it and begins to come down. You don’t move, not that Joel would let you, still holding you on his lap like he’s afraid to let you go.
You nuzzle into his embrace as his cock softens inside you.
You stay like that for a while, probably too long given that anybody could easily look into the car and see you straddling him. You don’t have the energy to care.
Eventually, you lift your head from its spot on Joel’s chest. Look up at him with bleary eyes.
“Joel,” you say.
He meets your gaze, face shiny with sweat and his hair a mess. He looks gorgeous like this, you think. The way only you get to see him.
“Yeah?” He grazes along your arm with featherlight fingers. His touch raises goosebumps on your skin.
“Did you mean it?”
“Mean what?”
“About wanting me.” In truth, you’re not sure you want the answer. But you need to know, definitively, if Joel is yours. You’re done sharing him.
“Oh, baby,” he drawls. “Of course I do. You’re all I want. Do you want me?”
And it’s a stupid question. He has to know that. You’re nodding before he can even finish it. “Yes,” you breathe. “I want you, Joel”
“Then it’s settled. It’s me and you. No more…interlopers.”
You giggle. Reluctantly separate yourself from his body and re-dress. You settle back into the driver’s seat with achy legs.
You’ve never felt more content than you do in this moment.
Still, you’ll have to hide — won’t be able to share the news of your new relationship with friends or coworkers, your dad — and neither will Joel. 
You don’t care much, not as long as he’s yours, but you need to be sure he feels the same.
“Joel,” you stop him as he opens the passenger-side door to get out. He stills with one leg swung out the door.
“Yeah, darlin’?”
“Are you sure you don’t mind…being a secret? Don’t mind keeping me a secret?”
He looks at you like you have two heads.
He pulls his leg back into the car. Shuts the door and leans over the console again.
Taking your chin between his fingers, he forces your gaze. Makes sure you’re listening.
“I want you — doesn’t matter who knows or doesn’t know. Long as you’re mine.”
Your chest tightens, and your heart squeezes inside your ribcage.
“I’m yours?”
He smiles. Presses a chaste kiss between your eyes, on the tip of your nose, on your lips. The same way he did the other morning. 
It all feels somehow sweeter, now.
“Yeah, angel. You’re mine. My girl.”
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end notes: tysm for reading! please consider commenting and/or reblogging if you enjoyed! I've been toying with the idea of turning this into a series so lmk if that's something you'd be interested in hehe.
Also, I hopped on the bandwagon and made a sideblog for notifs! I'll be doing away with a taglist from here on out, so follow @joelscurlsupdates & turn on notifications if you wanna be notified when I post a new fic :-)
tag list: @janaispunk @amanitacowboy @fhatbhabie @frannyzooey @lola8888673
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luveline · 5 months ago
Note
hiya jadey! A hotchner!reader x spencer request for you <3 Maybe Spencer comes home a little tense/snappy from a case and reader misinterprets it as anger towards her so she starts clesning and catering to what she thinks Spencer needs so he isn’t angry at her anymore? (even thought he never was.)
She sort of regresses into what she did when her adoptive parents weren’t pleased with her :(
love you love you love you superstar!
i love u <3 | fem, 1k
cw past emotional abuse
The door to Spencer’s apartment closes with a distinct clunk. Certainly shut too hard. 
It sends a horrible feeling deep into the very pit of your stomach. Like you could cry, then and there. You frown at the odd feeling and stand to shake it off. 
Spencer’s home. 
“Hey,” you say, calling without seeing him, making your way into the living room from his kitchen to find him at the door. 
His bag looks heavier than usual on a slouched shoulder, his hair puffy. He must’ve showered before they flew back into Virginia and air-dried his short curls. He drops his bag on the floor, scrubbing his face, nose and eyes screwed up tightly as his glasses push up to his forehead.
“You okay?” you ask.
His face flickers. “Fine.” 
It’s not the greeting you’d wanted. Maybe you’re egotistical or something but you’d at least expected a hug. He’s the one who invited you over, surely he wants to see you?
The queasy feeling worsens. 
You give him a little kiss on the cheek to test the waters. “Missed you.” 
“Yeah, I missed you too.” 
You aren’t convinced. Spencer rubs his face again, trudging to the couch to lay down. 
You send yourself into a tailspin. Looking around the apartment, you can see why he’s unhappy. You left your cup on the coffee table, your handbag on the armrest, there’s so much to clean up and put away. 
His silence means you did something wrong. 
He asked you to be there. He left you the key. But maybe he didn’t really want you there after all. 
When you were younger, you’d get home from school, and a half hour later your father’s car would park in the driveway. You’d get this feeling, then, a tenseness, not necessarily fear but anticipation. Some days it wouldn’t matter, and most days he’d come through the door like a animal to be coaxed into softness. You’d convince him to be angry at something else. Enable his fury, agree with every word he said. 
Smiling, calmed, he’d walk into a spotless kitchen and find a pan soaking in the sink. I just wish you’d have some fucking consideration, he’d say. Or, Really? Or he’d sigh like he couldn’t believe it and slam a cabinet door. 
Nothing was right. You weren’t worth any patience.
“Dove?” 
You peek around the doorway again, your tidying having taken you to the kitchen to wash your cup. “Yeah?” you say. 
“What are you doing?” 
“Just– just cleaning up.” 
“It’s fine. It’s clean, don’t worry about it.” He frowns at you. “Are you okay?” 
“‘Course.” 
His frown deepens. Spencer only ever frowns when he’s confused. When he’s upset he tends to press his lips together in an accidental pout, and when he’s angry, he’s stony. Spencer’s good at profiling because it’s his job. You learned it at home. Seeing anger in things most of all. 
“I’m fine. Are you okay?” you ask, wiping your hands on your shirt. “Sorry, I should’ve asked how the case was. It was tough, right? It– I mean, they’re all tough.” You smile as you sit on the couch beside him, one leg tucked underneath you. 
He shakes his head. “I’ve missed something. I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong.” 
“Nothing’s wrong.” 
“You’re not acting like yourself.” 
“Sorry.” You wince. “I thought you were having a bad day?” 
“I am. Or, I was.”
Spencer holds out his hand. When you take it, he pulls you toward him with the care of someone who knows what it’s like to be startled, shuffling toward one another to be knee to knee. He holds your arm like it’s all of you, pressing you to his chest. 
For a while, you just sit there. Quiet, almost silent, the apartment rests around you. Spencer frowns at your hand as he draws lines up and down your arm, but slowly his frown softens, and you realise your stress has faded with it. Spencer isn’t angry. And if he were, it’s not with you. 
“Sorry I shut the door hard when I came in,” he says. 
You feel caught. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not fine. Today was really bad, I got into it with Emily and the case… I don’t know. But coming home to you…” 
Spencer curls your fingers over his hand and presses them to the underside of his chin. 
“Thank you for coming over,” he says. “Did you eat?” 
You can’t help smiling, turning your hand slowly to cup his cheek, to hold him still. “I was waiting for you.” 
“Well, you decide and I’ll go pick it up.” 
“I can’t come with you?” 
“Do you want to?” He turns into your touch, glasses pushed against his eye, his lashes on the lense. 
You take back your hand. “Sure.” 
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, we’ll walk. It’ll be nice, the weather’s not too bad.” 
“You feel okay?” he asks. 
“Worried about me?” 
“What your brother might do to me,” he says, nodding into the joke. Then he cracks just as quickly and tugs you in to hug you sideways. “Worried about how I made you feel.” 
It wasn’t Spencer’s fault, but you don’t want to talk about it anymore. You push up taller than him to encircle his head and neck, pressing your nose into the soft crop of his hair. He squeezes the small of your back with similar gusto. “Got my wires crossed,” you mumble. 
”Want me to uncross them?” 
You say, Please, and Spencer pushes you away from him to put your arms firmly on the right sides of you, uncrossing you, and kissing you on the nose. 
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navybrat817 · 3 months ago
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Sweet as a Berry
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Pairing: Farmer!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader
Summary: You go to the local market to buy berries and meet the man of your dreams.
Word Count: Over 3.5k
Warnings: Fluff, meet-cute, flirting, tension, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?)
A/N: Welcome to my Bountiful Harvest AU ( or Farmer Fall as discussed with @thezombieprostitute and @witchywithwhiskey ) and our intro to farmer!Bucky. Thanks to @yenzys-lucky-charm and @targaryenvampireslayer for letting me babble about this man. ❤️ Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby , but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @saradika-graphics . Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
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Your weekly trip to the farmers market was one you looked forward to. A place for merchants to come together to offer an abundance of products, there was always something to browse or discover. Today you only had one thing on your list: berries for your pies. Frozen fruit did the job, but you preferred to bake your pies with fresh fruit. Buying from the market was also a way to support local farmers. Maybe one day you'd even bag a handsome farmer for yourself. It was a silly fantasy, of course, but your mind liked to wander some days.
Not that there was anything wrong with city men, but they couldn't compare to a man working on a farm. There was just something about a guy who knew how to work with nature and provide, wasn't intimidated by hard work or afraid to get his hands dirty, and had a strong body and character due to his work ethic. You liked to think you’d make a good wife and take care of him the way he’d take care of you. You also liked to imagine a handsome man walking inside after a long day and stripping down and wanting dessert before a hearty meal. And by dessert, you meant you.
For now, you were only a farmer’s wife in your dreams and journal.
The gravel crunched under your tires as you turned down the road, the market coming into focus. You made good time and managed to snag a decent parking space. A little bit of walking wouldn’t hurt. Plus the day was nice enough that you wore one of your sundresses, the soft breeze pleasant against your skin once you got out of your car.
Lively chatter greeted you as you got closer to the stalls and booths and expertly weaved your way through the bustling crowd. The various produce and flowers created a kaleidoscope of colors, brightened more by the brilliant rays coming from the sun. The earthy fragrance that blended with the sweet and ripe aromas was one you only encountered here. There was nothing else quite like it.
Quick movement in front of you made you come to a stop, your heart jumping. Had you not been paying attention you would've collided with a little boy. “Mama, there's Dada! He’s getting honey!” He shouted as he ran past and threw his arms around a man’s legs.
“Walk, please, and watch where you're going!” His mother said after him, a both fond and exasperated look on her face as she gave you a tired smile. “I’m so sorry about that.”
“No apologies,” you smiled. He hadn't done anything wrong. “I wish I had that energy.”
“Same. I’d bottle and sell it,” she said over her shoulder.
Watching as the woman went to her son and husband, both of them looking at her like the sun rose today because of her, you felt a twinge of sadness. Your trips to the market were solo, always had been. You longed to have a partner to go with, someone to put his arm around you or hold your hand as you picked out items together. Even better if the two of you could make a family down the line.
With a wistful smile, you shook yourself from those thoughts. There was no reason to feel sorry for yourself. Just because you didn't have that in the present didn't mean it wouldn't happen in the future. You had to have faith that the right one would come along at the right time.
For now, you would find some berries and be on your way.
Walking a bit further, you spotted a booth you hadn't seen in your previous visits. The sign that read “Barnes’s Berries” complete with hand painted fruit pieces piqued your curiosity as you stopped in front of it. As the customers in front of you paid for their bundles and blocked the view of the person assisting them, you took a minute to admire the range of berries reflecting a spectrum from blues to reds. Your mouth watered from the sight. There were so many things you could do with these. Pies, jams, cakes-
A deep, husky voice asked, “Is there anything I can help you with?”
You made some sort of sound as you turned around, your heart pounding in your chest. The man in front of you was tall with thick thighs that deliciously filled out his jeans. The rolled up plaid shirt exposed part of his arms. The left was covered in tattoos and the ink couldn't hide the muscles or veins. If anything, it accentuated his strength. His chest and shoulders seemed to go on for miles, too. The chestnut hair that fell below his chin and stubble on his face gave the already handsome man a rugged look.
Sapphire eyes crinkled when you made eye contact and he smiled so softly that you couldn't help but smile in return. A man of his size and stature working a berry stand when he looked like he could easily chop wood or build his own home was otherworldly. He didn't just step out of your fantasy. He took your thoughts and made them better than you could've imagined.
“Is there anything I can help you with?” He asked again a bit hesitantly when you didn’t answer his question. “If you're still looking, please, take your time.”
“You’re real, right?” You asked, your face heating up as the words left your mouth. A giggle followed because you couldn’t believe you just said that. “What I meant to say is, yeah. Just looking for now,” you added to save face, smoothing out your dress for no reason.
Amusement filled his eyes, the soft smile still tugging at his lips. “I sure hope I’m real and not just a figment of your imagination.”
You wished you could reach out and touch him to “prove” he was real, but didn’t want to weird him out. “Not a figment of my imagination,” you said, but that wasn’t totally true. You very much imagined a man like him when you were alone at night. “But I don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” It wasn't like you knew every single vendor, but you would've remembered him.
He sure as hell had a face worth remembering.
“I’m Bucky,” he introduced, offering you his hand. His grip was gentler than you expected, but there was no mistaking the roughness in his touch. The man worked with his hands and it showed. “This is actually my first week here.”
You said your name, proud that you remembered it with the way he was staring so intently at you. He stood a bit close, too. Close enough that you could smell his woodsy cologne. Subtle, yet enticing. “I hope everyone has been welcoming.”
“Most have been very friendly, which has made my job easy,” he said. You could imagine with his looks and friendly demeanor despite his size that he’d have a lot of repeat customers. “A couple of my friends recently started selling here, too, so it’s good to have some familiar faces close by.”
“That’s really nice. I’m sure they're glad you're close by, too,” you smiled. You wondered who his friends were. “Did you have to travel far to get here?”
“Yeah, they’re good guys,” he smiled back, your heart racing when he ran a hand through his hair. “Not too far since my farm is only a few miles away, which also makes things easier. Makes me wonder why I didn't do this sooner.”
You nearly swooned. Your dream man was becoming dreamier by the second. “You have a farm not too far from here?”
It would’ve been easy to assume he did since he had a stand here, but not everyone who worked the market had their own land. It was also easy to assume he wasn't married since you didn't see a ring on his left hand or any sort of tan line or indentation to indicate that he removed a ring. A man like that though probably had a partner. It wasn't worth getting your hopes up.
“Yeah. I have a few acres. Beautiful place. but if I’m being honest it gets a bit lonely since it’s just me out there with no one to share it with.” He scratched the back of his neck with a small chuckle and avoided your gaze. “I don't know why I said that. That’s kind of embarrassing.”
Your stomach did a funny flip. Not just because he pretty much let it slip that he wasn't with anyone when you assumed moments ago that he was, but from the urge to comfort him taking over. You wished you could wrap him in a hug.
“Well, I don't have a farm, but I understand feeling lonely some days,” you admitted. Being vulnerable with a complete stranger wasn't how you expected your day to go, but you wanted him to know he wasn't alone in that feeling. “And it’s not embarrassing,” you assured him. If anything, it was endearing.
He slowly met your gaze. “I appreciate that.” He rubbed the back of his neck again as your heart began to race. “I hope you don’t mind me saying so, but I find it hard to believe that someone as sweet and beautiful as you gets lonely.”
The compliment left you momentarily dazed before a shy smile graced your face. You could've said the same thing about him. Maybe the instant connection you felt wasn’t so one-sided. “Well, I do. Even coming here, I’m usually by my lonesome” you said, the words not at all bitter. Just honest. “And do you call all potential customers sweet and beautiful?”
“No, I don’t.” He continued to gaze at you before he cleared his throat. “But you said potential customer. If I made you uncomfortable…”
“You didn’t.” It was gentlemanly that he wanted to make sure that his comment didn’t put you off. “There’s a stand a little further down that I sometimes stop at, though your berries are extremely tempting.”
Bucky’s brows pinched before he snapped his fingers. “Jed, right? He’s actually not here this week. Had an accident recently. Broke his leg.”
You gasped. “Oh, my god. That’s awful.” Jed was a kind, older farmer who had been there for as long as you could remember. A hard worker who didn’t deserve any kind of pain. “I hope he heals quickly.”
Bucky nodded solemnly. “So, do I,” he said, clearing his throat. “I’m no Jed, but is there anything I can do to get your business today?”
The hopeful look in his blue eyes had you smiling slightly. “Well, I-”
“Wait. Let me try to guess what you’re specifically looking for before you tell me.” He waited until you nodded. “Clearly berries, but not for anything like a fruit salad or an everyday snack,” He rubbed his chin thoughtfully and you tried not to giggle when he grinned triumphantly. “Pies. You want berries to make pies. Blueberries, right? Maybe blackberries, too. And if I had to pick a third, raspberries.”
Your mouth fell open. Was he a mind reader? “Yeah, that’s exactly it. Blueberries, blackberries, and raspberries. I have this triple berry pie recipe that I love and I make the crust from scratch and…” You bit your lip to keep from rambling. He didn’t need to hear all that. “Sorry. I just like to bake.”
“No apologies.” His light touch to your arm surprised you as he met your gaze. “You sound very passionate about it and I like that.”
You found yourself nodding, unable to tear your gaze away. It took everything within you to not blurt out how gorgeous he was. And on top of that, he was kind? Maybe he wasn’t real. “I am passionate about it. And not just pies. Other treats, too,” you said, nodding to the strawberries. “Those would be perfect for mini shortcakes or scones.”
He studied you with an appreciative smirk. The sundress was a good choice. “I have no doubt your treats are delicious and you are making me very hungry,” he said, your heart thudding. The smirk disappeared as quickly as it appeared when he gestured to his stand. “And I think they’ll be tastier with my berries.”
You blinked, stuck on the fact that he called your treats delicious. It wasn’t a big deal. It wasn’t like he called you delicious and he hadn’t tasted anything of yours, though you’d find a way to bake something and deliver it to him personally if he asked. “You sound very confident, Bucky.”
He puffed his chest out. “I take a lot of pride in all my crops. Tell you what,” he said, stepping away from you to grab a sample cup. “Why don’t you try some and see how you like them? If they aren't the best berries you’ve ever tasted, I’ll shut my stand down and let you on your way.”
“You’ll really shut your stand down? That’s a big wager,” you smiled, his fingers touching yours as he handed the cup over. It heated you up all over again. “The look of them alone is amazing,” you said, the vibrant berries beckoning for you to have a bite.
“Taste amazing, too, but I’ll let you be the judge of that.”
Bucky shot you a dazzling smile as you tried the blueberry first since that was the berry you were most interested in purchasing today. You didn’t care if it was mortifying, you outright moaned at the flavor when you bit down on the small and plump piece of fruit. Not overly sweet or acidic as the juice coated your tongue. It was the perfect balance. So much that you licked your lips and craved another.
Your eyes honed in on the rise and fall of Bucky’s chest before your gaze flickered to his face. His eyes were darker and you realized after a moment that he was staring at your mouth. A look like that could’ve made you choke on your breath, but it somehow gave you a burst of confidence. Testing the waters, you tried the blackberry next and made a show of licking your lips again at the sweet and succulent taste. The groan he let out shot a burst of heat between your legs.
God, he looked like he was ready to eat you whole.
“Delicious,” you said in a sultry voice you didn't recognize.
“You, um…” He brought a hand up and brushed his thumb along the corner of your mouth. You quivered when he showed you the drop of juice that you missed. Without breaking eye contact, he licked the drop away. It was a look that melted your insides when he said in a gruff tone, “You're right. Delicious.”
“Excuse me?” A woman spoke, making you jump back a bit from Bucky and pulling you both out of the moment. She might as well have dumped a bucket of cold water over your head. “I’d like to buy these.”
Your heart continued to race when you saw disappointment flash in his eyes. “Go ahead,” you smiled. He was there to do a job after all, not chat and flirt with you. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Bucky turned his head toward the customer. “Of course, ma’am,” he smiled, still glancing back at you momentarily as if was afraid you’d walk away if he didn’t keep an eye on you.
Biting your lip, you held in a giggle as you tossed the sample cup into the small wastebasket. You swore you felt him gazing at you as you gathered up the bundles. Maybe you didn’t need to bend so far over to get the last bundle, but was it wrong that you wanted him to look? It wasn’t every day that you had a kind, handsome farmer flirting with you. It would have you walking on cloud nine for the rest of the day.
Turning toward the table to pay, you gasped when you nearly collided with Bucky. He managed to grab your arms to keep you from falling and you somehow didn’t drop a single bundle as he stared into your eyes. “You know, I think you’re even sweeter than my berries,” he spoke in a low voice, swiftly taking everything from your hands and lining them in a box before your brain could process what he said. “This everything then?”
“Yeah.” You blinked and got your money out to pay. “Thanks. And keep the change.”
He shook his head when he saw the amount you gave him. “Oh, I couldn’t do that.”
“Please. I insist,” you smiled. He took a lot of pride in his work and any extra change could go toward that.
“I’ll keep it on two conditions,” he said, nodding to the box. “One, you let me be a gentleman and help you carry that to your car, that way you’re not stuck carrying it around.”
You nodded, butterflies in your stomach. “Okay, if you insist on being a gentleman.” He was nice enough that he wanted to step away from his stand and carry something for you. He really kept getting better and better. “And the second condition?” You asked with a coy smile. Maybe if you were lucky enough he’d ask for your number.
He reached behind him and presented you with another sample cup. “One more for the road? Please?”
You stamped down your disappointment that he didn’t ask for your number, which was more than okay. “How can I say no to that?” You popped the berries into your mouth without hesitation. They tasted ever sweeter than the first sample you had and you watched his eyes go to your neck as you swallowed. “Thanks. You really do have a gift,” you added to distract you from his heated gaze.
He looked humbled by the compliment. “I really do appreciate that,” he said, glancing over your shoulder to nod at someone. “Steve! You mind watching the stand until I get back? I’m gonna help her carry these to her car.”
You turned just in time to see a gorgeous blonde just as large as Bucky jog over from the stand across the way. “That’s nice of you, jerk. Real gentlemanly,” he smiled, giving you a small nod. “Ma’am.”
“Punk,” Bucky mumbled, but the affection was evident.
Another giggle worked its way out. Where did these men suddenly come from? Was there something in the water you didn’t know about? “You don’t need to call me ma’am, but thank you. And you’re right.” Your eyes went back to Bucky. “He is a gentleman.”
“And this is my cue to get you away from my friend before he says otherwise,” Bucky teased, steering you away with one hand while he balanced your fruit in the other.
“I don’t think I’ve seen him here either.”
“That was one of the friends I was talking about earlier. Has a farm, too, but his real passion is art,” he explained, his arm brushing against yours as he walked close. “He actually helped make my sign since I’m hopeless with that stuff.”
“That’s really nice,” you said, falling into a comfortable silence with him as you both maneuvered your way through the crowd. Once you got to the parking area, you pointed out your vehicle. “I’m just over there.”
Bucky’s gaze flickered over to you as you got your keys out. “I’m really glad you stopped at my stand today.”
Your heart fluttered when you caught the sun shining along his hair. “I’m glad I did, too,” you said softly, unlocking the car so he could set everything inside. Thank God it was clean. That would’ve been embarrassing. “But I should let you get back to work.”
He shifted on his feet, like he wasn’t quite ready to go. “Yeah, I should go.” He stepped forward and took a breath. “But I don’t think I can go back before I ask you to go on a date with me.”
You blinked. This wasn’t a drill. Bucky was asking you out. His tone was so gentle, his gaze so compelling. He was mesmerizing. He could’ve asked you to do anything and you likely would’ve done so without question.
“You want to take me out on a date?” You questioned, your mind screaming that your response was the wrong answer. This wasn’t a fantasy. It was really happening.
With an unsure chuckle, Bucky brushed a hand through his hair. “Too forward?” He smiled a little. “I’m sorry. I just thought that we…”
Your heart reacted to his uncertainty. It took a lot for anyone to put themselves out there and you wanted him to know it was worth the risk. “Not too forward at all, Bucky,” you smiled and placed your hand on his left arm, happy when he smiled back. “I'd love to go out with you.”
He took your hand in his when you went to pull your hand back. “I’m really glad you said yes,” he whispered.
“Me, too,” you sighed at his warm touch. It was the beginning of something special. You could tell. “So, when would you like to go on that date?”
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And that is our intro! Now here is where it gets interesting: This story will go down two paths, one light and one dark. Be on the lookout for the continuation and choose your path (or choose both 😏). Love and thanks for reading! ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi
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pnutbutter-n-j-elyy · 7 months ago
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When They Call You Clingy So You Distance Yourself| Maknaeline Pt2
Warnings: Cursing, Mentionings of Death, Mentioning of Needles in a Medical sense
Pt1 Pt3 Hyungline  (xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
JISUNG|
"Please leave your message after the tone."
Jisung sat on the couch, his leg shaking anxiously. Minho sat next to him and tried calming his friend, as Felix walked in with a cup of hot chocolate, setting it down in front of Han.
"I'm sure its just the silent treatment." Minho comments, leaning back into the couch. "See one time I told my wife she talked to much and so she had the audacity to stay silent the entire week...she would only talk to the cats." He said. "I'm sure it's probably the same thing."
Changbin walks into the room and joins in the conversation. "Yah! You got it all wrong! She's probably crying because of her hand and can't come to the phone."
Hyunjin pipes in, poking his head up from the couch where he was trying to take a nap. "Yeah! So that means you have to go apologize. Grovel Jisung. GROVEL!!!"
Jisung's leg is still shaking, and he starts to gnaw on his thumb nail. "Somethings not right..." He mumbles. "I can feel it...it's a different type of anxiety...something...something isn't right."
Chan comes into the room and his face is pale. "Jisung...come here for a moment?"
The boba eyed boy felt a pit drop to his stomach as he walked towards his hyung.
"What's the make and model of Y/N's car?" He asked quietly.
"It's...it's a foreign car...Lin...Lincoln...its...blue. Why? Why are you asking."
Chan licked his lips nervously. "Jisung...they could be wrong but a staff member said they had seen...there was...its..."
"What? They saw what!" Jisung's right hand found his other, and he started twisting his finger, picking at himself anxiously. "They saw what hyung?!"
The aussie boy's face was grim as he spoke. "There was a pretty bad accident near the hospital. The staff member had said they weren't sure but thought they saw Y/N's car. They were pretty certain since there aren't a ton of cars that look like her's..."
"Sh-she's not..." Jisung mumbled.
"I'm gonna go grab the car." Chan said quietly, walking past the rest of the members, who stared into the kitchen with confusion.
"Hyung...?" Jeongin called out quietly sounding like a lost kid as he watched his leader walk to the key dish. He looked back at Jisung who looked as if a little piece of him just broke off. He looked numb. Jeongin turned to the rest of the members who were all watching in concern as well.
Minho walked up to Chan and asked him something lowly, his posture straightening in shock when he heard the news. Minho looked at Jisung who was silently sliding on his shoes.
He motioned for the rest of the members to leave the room and he followed suit right after, too scared himself to look at his younger friend as he walked by; afraid he would see his heart break even further every second that passed.
"Hyung...what's going on?" Seungmin asked when Minho entered in the living room. He sighed and waited to answer until he heard Chan's car drive off.
(////////////////////)
The smell of the bleached floors and sterilized surfaces were the only thing keeping Jisung grounded in the present moment when him and Chris walked into the lobby of the hospital.
"Excuse me, is there a Y/N L/N here?" Jisung tried to block out the quakiness in Chan's voiced. He viewed you as family as much as everyone else in the group. And if Jisung gaslit himself into believing that Chan wasn't scared - then he could easily gaslight himself into believing that you were safe and sound. The receptionist looked through the system and shook his head.
"My apologies but I don't see a Y/N...L...L-L...L/N..." While struggled to pronounce your name; Jisung felt his mind go down all the worst possible scenarios.
What if Y/N is at the morgue. What if on impact she- what if she...
"Excuse me but do you have an unidentified foreigner?" Chan asks. "From a car accident."
The receptionist immediately perked up in understanding. "Yes! There was a lady she was pulled from a blue foreign car! They were trying to find her point of contact. She was brought to that win-"
He was interrupted by a small group of nurses and a doctor running down the hallway and a scream down the hall.
"She's flatlining!" Jisung couldn't even comprehend his feet moving as he followed the team of medical professionals down the hall- even though Chris called out for him to wait.
He pushed his way through the crowd of people into the room and couldn't even hear the monitor give one long continuous over the thumping of his heart as numerous nurses and doctors tried to revive the lonely patient on the bed. You had left to give him distance. Something he had asked for.
It was his fault. His fault entirely.
He couldn't breathe and as one doctor announced time of death another turned to see the chubby cheeked boy stumbling back and falling onto his floor from shock. The doctor rushing over to tend to him as he started to black out.
No...No. She's not. She can't be. God, no. Please. Please. It's my fault. I asked her to leave. She can't be gone. I asked her to leave. I only meant a minute, not for the rest of my life. Please...please.
I'm sorry Y/N. I'm sorry.
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
FELIX|
"I shouldn't have yelled at her." Felix mumbled to himself as he turned into the dorm days later. 3 days to be exact.
He had felt frustrated after work due to arguing with Hyunjin over something he couldn't even pinpoint now. And it was even more stupid because Hyunjin didn't even remember, and they agreed to amount it to the stress they were facing with some rumors and controversy started up by toxic netizens as they reached closer and closer to their comeback day.
They had to play so much damage control that all Felix could do - and any of the members really - was think about how to keep things in control until the higher ups could completely clear everything before things got out of hand.
"Yeesh!" He groaned banging his head against the headrest in front of him, the driver shooting a concerned look in the rearview mirror before parking the car and unlocking the doors.
Felix nodded his head in thanks and walked inside immediately going to his room with his belongings, ignoring the "welcome home"'s and "your back's from the other members.
He closed his door, and poured out the contents of his shopping bags.
He had gotten the replacements he needed for his gaming setup.
And head also gotten you a ton of gifts.
He placed out five different plushies, one white teddy bear with a black and gold bow, a baby chicken plushie, a toddler sized stuff lamb that was also rather coquette, and plushy of a smiling taco and lastly one of a green and blue boba.
Which one would she like best...all of them maybe?
He then started sorting out all your favorite treats, some self-care products you liked a lot, the collector's edition of your favorite book and movies series, a gift card to your favorite coffee shop, a couple of notebooks and other little miscellaneous items you liked. He had also been able to persuade your bias from another group to give him a rare pc of them since he had heard you mention it before.
Should I just give them all to her?
He groaned again as Seungmin walked in looking for him.
"Passing a kidney stone or something hyung?" He asked as he closed the door behind him.
"No...just trying to figure out how to apologize after I insulted my girlfriend's intelligence and mental development, yelled at her, cursed at her, mocked her, and dismissed her genuine care and concern for me in under thirty minutes of me walking into her home." Seungmin's eyes widened and he looked to see keyboards new keyboard sitting neatly in an amazon box.
"Over a game? Damn, I didn't know the stereotypes were accurate." He said, arranging some of Felix's gifts into the basket he had gotten to transport them to you.
"I'm sure Y/N-ie is feeling rather hurt though...but you've been acting off ever since you left her house earlier this week. And usually you're a sensitive overthinker when it comes to her. I would have assumed you'd have been at her door crying within the hour after it happened."
Felix sighed. Why do you think I had a puffy face at practice the next day?" He mumbled. "I went back a couple hours later because I was mean Min...she...I haven't seen Y/N look so scared before. I was scared. That maybe it had made her see me differently. So I waited a couple hours to make sure everyone was calm but when I went in she wasn't there... she wasn't there."
Felix sat down on the bed and played with the end of the ribbon on one of the plushies.
"To be honest...I found a bunch of rags in the trash. I could have sworn she had bought them last time we went shopping which wasn't too long ago...but they were frayed and almost to the point they were just a loose thread. I mean...she took varnish off the table Seungmin..."
His voice began to wobble.
"I got so frustrated that I yelled at her. And she had never heard me like that before so it scared her into manic frenzy?" He let all the tears he had been holding back stream down his face. "I horrible Seungmin. How could I do anything like that to someone I love?"
T?he puppy like boy wrapped his arms around his usually bubbly hyung and sighed. It only made Felix cry harder because he knew that physical affection wasn't something he normally got from Seungmin.
"It'll be okay. Y/N loves you. You'll be forgiven. This is the first time. The first major fight is always hard. You just have to recognize it won't be the last. And you have to figure out how to pull through."
Felix nodded as Seungmin pulled away. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me, we're brothers." He said, patting Felix on the head twice.
"And it is my brotherly duty to tell you that Chan- Hyung asked for you to do the dishes, but that I'll do them so you can go see Y/N in exchange for you cleaning the bathrooms for me later."
He had a devious smirk on his lips and Felix didn't even hesitate to take that offer.
He'd take any offer, make any deal, in order to lead him to making things right with you.
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
SEUNGMIN|
It was getting to the point that Stays were noticing it.
Seungmin didn't have that life in him that he usually did on stage and the fans easily surmised it to be because him and you were fighting.
It was a simply thing to deduce really when no one spotted you at the concert - but you were still the only other account Seungmin followed minus those of his members and the band as a whole.
And with the way you and Seungmin's chemistry was almost palpable, the fans were more than assured that you guys hadn't broken broken up do to his mood being low but not rock bottom.
Well...they were almost assured. But it seemed to be growing less and less by the day due to you not being sighted anywhere.
Due to you wanting to be petty, and hurt Seungmin, even just the tiniest bit.
Which completley backfired.
Seungmin was onstage and the atmosphere was electric. He silently applauded his members and the crew since the sixth show was an absolute success. But the minute the blaring music, the bright lights and the scream of fans died down as Chan spoke to the audience he couldn't hold it back anymore.
The thoughts that had been flooding his mind in the quiet hours of the night had surfaced and he couldn't help but break down right then and there.
Changbin walked over, simply thinking Seungmin was crying from the overwhelming sense of love and joy he felt for his fans- but immediately identified it as something else when his younger friend squatted down, pulling his arms straight out in front of him and ducking his head as he cried.
He immediately bent down with Seungmin and he looked up as he cried desperately.
"H-Hyung p-please don't let her leave me alone...I'm lonely without her...Please...I don't wanna be alone..." Changbin shielded the boy from the prying eyes of fans, and Hyunjin catching the drift came over as well, while the other members did things to keep the audience from wondering why Seungmin was wailing with a brokenness many of them were fortunate enough to not understand.
You on the other hand were rotting away on your bed.
You had been replaying the interaction you had with Seungmin over and over.
You felt like being petty and purchased a ticket to a group Seungmin was well aware of you stanning long before Stray Kids.
The same group which contained a member you biased long before you even set eyes on Seungmin.
A member which made Seungmin somewhat self-concious. While you always called him beautiful, and gorgeous, and intimate names that held the same deep feeling as you held for him; he couldn't help but watch you giggle over a guy that wasn't necessarily what you would consider beautiful - but was evidently dripping in sex appeal.
It had always worried him that you didn't find him desirable in that way, but just romantically. Even if you assured him countless times that it would only ever be him that you were interested in, and he fully believed you he couldn't just shake that seed that had planted itself there.
The concert was on the day of their last destination. And you felt like it would be the perfect jab at him for dismissing your complete adoration for you to a "burden".
But the more you sat at home thinking about it the more you realized you never wanted to hurt Seungmin purposefully.
That even if he hurt you a thousand times over you would still run back to him because he was both the pain and cure.
And deep down you knew he loved you just as much - if not more - than you loved him.
He loved you enough to risk his entire career to ask you out, when you hadn't known each other very long and there was a high chance of you saying no.
But you could never say no to Seungmin.
You pressed the heels of your hands to your eyes to stop the tears you had in your eyes but it did nothing but rub the eyeliner you had on into your eyes causing a painful irritation.
"Shit," You mumbled grabbing your phone to use the cameras as a mirror. But as you were picking you nail scratched your eye. "Fuck! Ahhhhh!" You whined feeling another rush of tears coming.
You tried seeing if your eye was okay when you got a notification on instagram.
It was soon followed by a bunch more and a bunch of message requests.
You clicked to see what the post was and nearly felt your heart sink as you watched your boyfriend breaking down on stage.
You had never seen him so distraught; nor did you know him as one to cry much.
You immediately sat up in bed, ignoring the pain from earlier and watching the screen intently.
I hurt him. You thought to yourself.
I hurt him. I got back at him...didn't I want this? For him to feel what I felt that night?
You looked through the countless messages, all asking if you and Seungmin had broken up.
Some stays even pleading with you to not hurt their precious idol.
But it was much too late for that.
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
JEONGIN|
"Hyung can you drive faster?"
Jeongin anxiously bounced his leg up and down in the back seat.
He had been crippled with anxiety for the past six days as he had waited to return from filming their boys trip.
Especially after Changbin had informed him that you had been put in the hospital.
Although no matter how hard he begged the staff that had accompanied them for filming refused to let him leave due to the "importance of this specific filming venture".
He had called you over 100 times by now he was sure of it. Each of his calls deflected.
He had called the ITZY girls on numerous different occasions as well to see if you were doing okay, if they could tell him what was wrong.
But each time the conversation was cut short due to a strange reason, without much detail given other than-
"Y/N is fine."
"We haven't been able to visit since our staff won't let us rearrange the schedule. But she's fine."
"She's fine, just resting."
Fine. What the hell is fine supposed to mean? They sounded guarded; as if they knew something and just refused to tell me.
The minute Jeongin started seeing lots of foot and automotive traffic he felt his heart quicken.
"Hyung just drop me off at Y/N's house first."
"Shouldn't you go change? And maybe by a few gufts as an apology? You were an ass." Changbin comments as he scrolls through Amazon looking at different protein powders.
"I just want to see her." Jeongin said gripping onto the head rest that was behind Hyunjin's head.
Chan mumbled in the back, stirring from his sleep. "Just drop Innie off...it'll help soother his anxiety." He said turning back towards the window and putting his head against it for a couple more minutes to nap.
Hyunjin typed your address into the GPS, and redirected his route to head over to your place.
Jeongin settled back into his seat, his knee still jumping up and down until Chris put his hand on it squeezing it gently to get the maknae to stop.
"It's okay..." He murmured sleepily. "She's okay...just be there for her...I bet its hard." His cheek pressed against the window and he started to doze off again.
The hidden meaning of Chan's words was something that Jeongin wasn't able to interpret, but it just made him want to see you more.
To get down on his knees and beg you to forgive him for being so careless.
So heartless and insensitive.
You had reaached out to him for help, and maybe if he would have helped you in the moment - instead of tearing you down then everything would have been okay right now.
He could only imagine you laying sick in your bed. Cold and lonely.
He wanted to run to you, comfort you and be able to hold you as you cried into his arms.
He wanted to be the boyfriend he usually was, the one you could easily embrace. The type of boyfriend who would go to the ends of the Earth to protect you; or to find someone who hurt you.
He wanted to be enough.
But in order to do that he had to apologize first.
So as he stood at your door, tyoing in your passcode (your guys anniversary), he ran through all the things he would do to apologize.
Do I apologize before I hug her? Or do I hug her first...she might be crying since she's so sick maybe I should-
When he opened the door, he was not expecting to see you lounging on the couch with a bowl of assorted candy in your lap as you watched a 24 minute long compilation of Gojo edits.
You looked at Jeongin with wide eyes, an airhead mid bite in your mouth.
If it were any other cirucumstance Jeongin would have laughed at the oddity of the situation.
But instead his chin started to tremble and he began to cry.
You instantly rushed over to him, because no matter how petty you wanted to be you couldn't stand seeing the adorable man you loved so much cry.
"Innie- why..."
"I thought- I thought you were..." He couldn't even finish his sentence for the next few minutes as he just sat in your foyer crying.
You rubbed his back, even though you still felt a little annoyed by his antics of the previous week. And that he had interrupted your you time.
Which reminded you of something.
"I'll be right back Innie." You said as you headed towards your bathroom.
But with the amount of anxiety Jeongin had dealt with for the past week he couldn't stop himself from following you moments after.
You didn't notice that he had, so you proceeeded to do as you had been doing ever since you got home from the hospital.
With the click of a button, a small needle pricked your middle finger, and ruby red blood pooled from the small space.
Then a much lengthier needle pierced its way through the insulin bottle you had kept in your medicine cabinet and you pulled up the length of your shorts up to inject the liquid into the fattier part of your leg.
You winced in slight pain, still trying to get used to this new change in pace; in lifestyle.
When you took the needle out, putting it in the makeshift biohazard bin you had made, all the other needles clearly visible, you heard a soft little sniff.
You turned around to see Jeongin, staring at you, his brows furrowed and twitching slightly as he watched you with concern, the slightest hint of betrayal, disappointment and pain in his face.
"Jagiya?"
(xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
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jupiterpilgrim · 1 month ago
Text
The Elf Who Couldn't Help
Christmas Special 🎄
Miyeon x Male Reader
word count: 5K
Tumblr media
You're wandering through the crowded mall, Christmas music blasting from every direction as you try to check off the last few items on your shopping list. The usual holiday chaos surrounds you - parents dragging screaming kids, teenagers hogging the benches, old people walking too damn slow. Just another December afternoon.
That's when you spot the Santa's workshop setup near the food court. There's a long-ass line of hyper children waiting to sit on Santa's lap, but what catches your eye is his helper elf. She's this tiny Asian girl in a green costume that looks about two sizes too big, desperately trying to wrangle the kids into some kind of order.
"Please stay in line! One at a time!" Her voice is high and stressed as a group of boys completely ignores her, ducking under the rope barriers.
You can't help but chuckle at how overwhelmed she looks. The elf costume is ridiculous - striped tights, pointy shoes with bells, and a hat that keeps sliding down over her eyes. But there's something endearing about how hard she's trying, even as chaos erupts around her.
And she's undeniably adorable too.
"Fucking hell," you mutter under your breath as another kid breaks free from the line, causing even more chaos. The girl's shoulders slump in defeat as she tries to restore order. This will definitely be a long day for the poor thing.
You continue with your shopping, but find yourself passing by the Santa setup a few more times. Each time, the poor elf looks more and more frazzled. Her dark hair is escaping from under the hat, her cheeks are flushed, and she's practically jogging to keep up with all the line-cutting kids.
"Please, one at a time!" the elf girl pleads, her voice cracking slightly. You notice dark circles under her eyes as you walk past.
After finishing up your shopping, you head to your car feeling accomplished. That's when your phone buzzes - a text from your mother saying your cousin - yes, that cousin - decided last-minute to join Christmas dinner.
Fuck.
Now you need another gift.
With a sigh, you trudge back into the mall. The Santa setup is gone now, packed away for the night. You quickly grab a generic gift card (he's not worth much effort anyway) and head back to the parking lot.
That's when you hear it - soft sniffling coming from between two cars. You pause, keys in hand. The sound continues, clearly someone crying. Following the noise, you find a small figure curled up against a tire, wearing that ridiculous elf costume.
"Hey... are you okay?" You ask gently.
She jerks up with a gasp, hastily wiping her eyes. It's the same elf from earlier, but her makeup is smeared and her eyes are red and puffy.
"I'm fine!" She squeaks, trying to force a smile. "Just... just taking a break!"
You raise an eyebrow. "In the parking lot? At night?"
She deflates slightly. "Okay, maybe not just taking a break..."
"I saw you earlier, helping Santa. Rough day with the kids?"
A bitter laugh escapes her. "That obvious, huh?" She sniffs and wipes her nose with her sleeve. "Everything went wrong. The kids were crazy, I couldn't control them, I dropped hot chocolate all over myself... and now they're firing me. Said I'm not 'elf material.'"
"That's harsh. Those kids were like wild animals though, not sure anyone could have controlled them."
She shrugs, looking down at her ridiculous pointed shoes. "I really needed this job though. Even just through Christmas..."
"I'm sorry. I'm sure you'll find something else soon." You hesitate for a second, then you say your name.
"Miyeon," she replies softly.
"Nice to meet you, Miyeon. Look, this might sound weird but... would you want to grab something to eat? You look like you could use a friend right now."
Her eyes widen. "Oh! That's very kind but... I don't know you. And I probably look terrible..." She gestures at her tear-stained face.
You grin. "Come on, who doesn't want to have dinner with a Christmas elf? I promise I'm not a serial killer. We can go somewhere public with lots of witnesses."
That gets a small laugh out of her. "I really shouldn't..."
Right on cue, her stomach lets out a loud growl. Her face turns bright red.
"When's the last time you ate?" You ask.
"Um... breakfast? Maybe?" She admits sheepishly. "I was too nervous to eat lunch..."
"That settles it then. Come on, my treat. Consider it my good deed for the holiday season."
She bites her lip, clearly conflicted. "You really don't have to..."
"I want to. Plus, how often do I get to take an elf to dinner? It'll make a great story."
Finally, a real smile breaks through. "Okay... but only if you promise to drive me home after?"
"Scout's honor," you reply, helping her up.
You lead her to your car, noticing how small and vulnerable she looks in the ridiculous elf costume. During the short drive, you learn that Miyeon is a college student who needed extra money for textbooks next semester.
"The mall job seemed perfect," she explains. "Decent pay for just two weeks of work. But I guess I'm not cut out for dealing with kids."
"Those weren't kids, they were tiny terrorists," you reply, making her giggle.
At the diner, you slide into a booth and watch in amusement as Miyeon demolishes a huge plate of pancakes. She pauses between bites, suddenly self-conscious.
"Am I being rude? I must look like such a pig..."
"Not at all. Eat up - you've earned it after this sitty day."
Other diners keep glancing at your table, probably wondering why there's an elf having breakfast for dinner. Miyeon shrinks under their stares.
"Don't you need to return the costume?" you ask.
She shakes her head. "Had to buy it myself. Waste of money now..."
"Seriously? They made you pay for it? That's fucked up."
"Yeah... I spent most of my savings on it too." Her voice wavers slightly.
You study her as she eats - she really is cute, even in the silly costume. There's something genuine and sweet about her that draws you in.
"So what are you studying?" you ask.
"Art history. Everyone says it's useless but... I love it. There's something magical about understanding how art has shaped human culture throughout time."
Her eyes light up as she talks about her studies, hands gesturing animatedly. You find yourself smiling at her enthusiasm.
"That's actually really cool. Most people just chase whatever degree will make them the most money."
"That's what my parents wanted me to do," she sighs. "They think I'm wasting my time. The mall job was supposed to prove I could be responsible and support myself but..." she trails off, looking down at her empty plate.
"Hey, no matter what they think. Do what makes you happy."
She gives you a grateful smile that makes your heart skip a beat.
After dinner, you drive her home as promised. She lives in a small apartment complex near campus.
"Thank you so much for everything," Miyeon says sincerely. "I don't know how to repay you."
You pretend to think hard for a moment.
"Hmm, how about drinks tomorrow night?" you suggest. "No elf costume required."
Her eyes widen. "Are you... are you asking me out?"
"Unless that would be weird?"
"No! I mean... no, it wouldn't be weird. I'd like that." Her cheeks flush pink.
"Great. I'll text you?"
She nods, typing her number into your phone. As she gets out of the car, she turns back one more time.
"You know... maybe getting fired wasn't the worst thing after all."
The next evening, you meet Miyeon at a cozy bar downtown. She looks completely different out of the elf costume - wearing a simple sweater and jeans that highlight her petite but curvy figure. Her dark hair falls in soft waves around her face.
"Wow, you clean up nice," you tease. "Almost didn't recognize you without the pointy ears."
She rolls her eyes but smiles. "Never mention that costume again. I'm trying to repress those memories."
Over drinks, conversation flows easily. You learn that Miyeon moved here from Korea as a child, that she has a passion for Renaissance art, and that she secretly loves terrible reality TV shows. She's funny and smart, with a dry sense of humor that catches you off guard.
"So what do you do?" she asks, sipping her cocktail.
You tell her about your job, making her laugh with stories about your weird coworkers. As the night goes on, you find yourself moving closer together, knees touching under the table.
"Want to know a secret?" Miyeon says, slightly tipsy. "I actually hate Christmas music now. Hours of Jingle Bells on repeat will do that to you."
"I don't blame you. That shit's torture."
She giggles, leaning into you slightly. "You know what else? Some of those kids were evil. Like, actually evil. One bit me!"
"No fucking way!"
"Yes! Right here!" She rolls up her sleeve to show you a small bruise on her forearm. Without thinking, you gently run your fingers over the mark. Her skin is incredibly soft.
Miyeon shivers slightly at your touch, looking up at you with those big dark eyes. The air between you feels charged suddenly.
"Do you want to take a walk in the park?" you ask softly.
Shd nods, biting her lower lip.
The winter air nips at your faces as you and Miyeon stroll through the park. Christmas lights twinkle in the trees, creating a magical atmosphere despite the late hour. Snow crunches beneath your feet as you walk close together, shoulders brushing.
"Thanks for tonight," Miyeon says softly. "I really needed this after... you know." She gestures vaguely, probably referring to the elf fiasco.
"Hey, I should be thanking you. Not every day I get to rescue a damsel in distress from a parking lot," you tease.
She playfully shoves your shoulder. "I wasn't in distress! I was just... strategically regrouping."
"Is that what we're calling crying behind a car now?"
"Shut up," she laughs, but moves closer to you as a cold breeze whips past.
You find a bench overlooking a small pond, its surface reflecting the colorful lights. Sitting close together for warmth, you can smell her light floral perfume mixing with the crisp winter air.
"You know what's funny?" Miyeon says, watching her breath form little clouds. "If I hadn't been such a terrible elf, we never would have met."
"You weren't terrible. Those kids were demons."
"True. But still..." She turns to look at you, snowflakes catching in her dark hair. Her cheeks are pink from the cold and maybe the drinks. "I'm kind of glad it happened."
The moment feels perfect - the lights, the snow, her eyes shining as she looks up at you. You lean in slowly, giving her time to pull away if she wants to.
Instead, she meets you halfway.
Her lips are soft and slightly cold from the winter air. The kiss is gentle, tentative at first, then deepening as she sighs against your mouth. Your hand comes up to cup her cheek, thumb brushing away a snowflake.
When you finally part, Miyeon's eyes stay closed for a moment longer, a small smile playing on her lips.
"Wow," she breathes.
"Yeah," you agree eloquently, making her giggle.
The next few days pass in a pleasant blur. You text constantly, sharing memes and stories about your days. She sends you pictures of terrible Christmas sweaters at thrift stores, you counter with photos of your coworker's increasingly elaborate desk decorations.
You meet up again for coffee between her job hunting attempts. This time she's wearing an oversized sweater that makes her look even tinier, hands wrapped around a steaming peppermint latte.
"I had another interview today," she sighs. "At a bookstore this time."
"How'd it go?"
"Well, I didn't cry or spill anything, so better than the mall job already." She takes a sip of her drink, leaving a foam mustache that you resist the urge to kiss away. "But they said they're looking for someone with more retail experience."
"That's bullshit. How are you supposed to get experience if no one will hire you?"
"Exactly!" She throws up her hands in frustration. "It's like they expect me to emerge fully formed from the womb with five years of customer service experience."
You think for a moment. "You know... my friend works at that art supply store downtown. I could put in a word?"
Miyeon's eyes light up. "Really? You'd do that?"
"Of course. Plus, it's related to your major kind of. You'd be surrounded by art stuff all day."
She practically bounces in her seat. "That would be amazing! Thank you-thank you-thank you!"
Her enthusiasm is infectious. You can't help but lean across the table to kiss her, tasting peppermint on her lips.
The art store interview goes well - Your friend's recommendation carries weight, and Miyeon's genuine passion for art shines through. They hire her for a temporary position through the holiday season, with potential to stay on part-time after.
"I start Monday!" she tells you excitedly over the phone. "And the employee discount is amazing. I'm going to buy so many fancy pencils."
You celebrate with takeout at her tiny apartment near campus. It's cramped but cozy, walls covered in art prints and fairy lights. You sit on her futon eating Chinese food straight from the containers while she tells you about all her plans.
"The manager said they do workshops sometimes too. Like, teaching basic techniques and stuff. Maybe eventually I could lead one!" She's practically vibrating with excitement.
"Look at you, moving up in the world. From disgraced elf to art guru."
She throws a fortune cookie at your head. "Never mention the elf thing again! I'm trying to maintain some dignity here."
You catch the cookie and crack it open. "'A surprise encounter will lead to lasting happiness.’ Huh, guess these things are right sometimes."
Miyeon blushes, ducking her head. You set aside the takeout containers and pull her close, kissing her slowly. She melts against you, fingers curling into your shirt.
The makeout sessions are becoming a regular thing, but neither of you pushes for more. It's nice, this slow build of intimacy. Learning the little things about each other - how she scrunches her nose when she laughs, the way she absently hums while reading, her habit of stealing sips of your drinks and more.
You help her prepare for her first day, picking out an outfit that's professional but still her style.
She texts you updates throughout the day:
"OMG there are so many types of pencils. How are there this many pencils??"
"Just had to explain to someone why they can't return used paint. Why are people like this?"
"A kid just asked me what colors taste the best. I told him blue. Hope I don't get sued."
After her shift, you meet her for dinner. She's tired but happy, chattering about everything she learned.
"And did you know there are pencils that cost like $50 EACH? For one pencil! But they're so smooth, feel this!" She pulls a sample pencil from her bag, making you test it on a napkin.
"Very smooth," you agree, charmed by her enthusiasm. "Worth $50?"
"Maybe not $50, but with my discount..." She wiggles her eyebrows suggestively.
The days leading up to Christmas pass quickly. You help Miyeon learn the store's inventory system, quizzing her on different types of paper and brush sizes. She introduces you to her favorite cheap noodle places near campus.
One evening, you're walking her home when it starts snowing heavily. She tilts her head back, sticking out her tongue to catch snowflakes.
"You know what?" she says thoughtfully. "I actually kind of miss the elf costume. Just a tiny bit."
You raise an eyebrow. "Stockholm syndrome kicking in?"
"No, it's just... if I hadn't taken that stupid job, if I hadn't been so bad at it... we wouldn't be here now." She stops walking, turning to face you. "Sometimes the worst things lead to the best things, you know?"
You brush snow from her hair. "Very philosophical. Must be all that art history education."
"Shut up," she laughs, standing on tiptoes to kiss you. Her lips are cold but her mouth is warm, tasting like the hot chocolate you shared earlier.
When she pulls back, her eyes are serious. "Thank you. For everything. The job, the support... just being there."
"Hey, I got something out of it too. How many people can say they're dating a former mall elf?"
She groans. "I take it back. You're the worst."
But she's smiling as she says it, snowflakes catching on her eyelashes, and you think maybe those fortune cookies know what they're talking about after all.
The art supply store keeps her busy through the holiday rush. You bring her coffee during her breaks, watching her explain different types of paints to customers with growing confidence. She's in her element here, surrounded by creative supplies and fellow art enthusiasts.
"A lady asked me to recommend brushes for oil painting today," she tells you proudly. "And I actually knew what to suggest! I'm becoming one of those knowledgeable retail people."
"Better than being one of those retail people who hides in the stockroom to cry," you point out.
"That was ONE TIME," she protests, but she's laughing.
Finally, about two days before Christmas, you invite her over to your place for dinner. You've cooked before, but tonight feels different. There's an electricity in the air, an unspoken anticipation.
Miyeon shows up wearing a simple red dress that hugs every curve. Her dark hair falls in soft waves past her shoulders, and you catch a hint of floral perfume when she hugs you hello.
"Something smells amazing," she says, following you to the kitchen.
"Don't sound so surprised," you tease. "I can cook sometimes."
"Sometimes being the key word." She peers into the pot on the stove. "Remember the Great Pasta Disaster of last week?"
"Hey, how was I supposed to know the sauce would explode like that?"
She laughs, stealing a piece of garlic bread. "My ceiling is still stained red. My landlord thinks I murdered someone up there."
Dinner is comfortable, filled with your usual banter. But there's an undercurrent of tension, a charge building between you. Every accidental brush of hands sends sparks down your spine. You catch her staring at your lips more than once.
After the dishes are done, you move to the couch with glasses of wine. Miyeon curls up against your side, fitting perfectly under your arm. You can feel her heart racing.
"This is nice," she murmurs, tracing patterns on your thigh.
"Yeah?" Your voice comes out rougher than intended. "Just nice?"
She tilts her head up to look at you, eyes dark and intense. "Maybe more than nice..."
You cup her face with one hand, thumb brushing her cheek. She leans into the touch, breath hitching slightly.
"Miyeon..."
"Yes?"
"Do you like me?"
Instead of answering, she surges up to press her lips against yours. It starts soft, tentative, but quickly deepens into something more urgent. Her tongue slides against yours as she shifts to straddle your lap, dress riding up her thighs.
You run your hands up her sides, feeling her shiver. She grinds down against you, drawing a groan from your throat. When you break for air, her pupils are blown wide with desire.
"Bedroom?" You manage to ask.
She nods frantically. "Please."
You stand, lifting her with you. Her legs wrap around your waist as you carry her down the hall, still kissing. You nearly trip twice, making her giggle against your mouth.
Finally reaching the bedroom, you put her back on the floor, your fingers gently touch her cheek, she looks up at you with such trust and want that it makes your chest ache.
"You're sure about this?" You have to ask.
"I've never been more sure of anything," she replies.
That’s all you needed to hear.
Your hands roam over Miyeon's body, mapping every delicious curve through her thin dress. She arches into your touch, soft moans escaping her perfect lips. When you kiss down her neck, she threads her fingers through your hair, pulling you closer.
"I've wanted this for so long," she whispers, her voice trembling with need. "Ever since we first met..."
You gently bite her neck, making her gasp. "Me too, princess. You drive me fucking crazy." Your hands slide down to squeeze her ass through the dress. She feels so perfect, so soft yet firm.
Miyeon grinds against you, her breath coming faster. "Please... touch me more..." She guides your hand to her breast, letting you feel her hardened nipple through the fabric.
You waste no time sliding the dress straps off her shoulders, revealing more of her flawless porcelain skin. Her medium breasts spill free, pink nipples begging for attention. "Fuck, you're gorgeous," you growl, taking one peak into your mouth.
"Ohh! Yes, suck them..." She holds your head to her chest as you lavish her breasts with your tongue, alternating between gentle licks and firm sucking. Her moans get louder when you graze your teeth over the sensitive buds.
Your hands push her dress down further until it pools at her feet. Miyeon stands before you in just her lacy panties, her face flushed with arousal and slight embarrassment. You drink in the sight of her nearly naked body.
"You're staring too much," she says shyly.
You gently grab her wrists. "It's because you're fucking perfect." You pull her close for a deep kiss, your tongue exploring her mouth as your hands roam her exposed skin.
She melts into the kiss, pressing her breasts against your chest. You can feel her nipples hard against you through your shirt. Her hands tug at the fabric. "Take this off... I want to feel your skin..."
You break the kiss just long enough to pull your shirt over your head. When your bare chest meets hers, you both moan at the contact. Her skin is so incredibly soft against yours.
"Bed. Now." You guide her backwards until her knees hit the mattress. She lies back, dark hair fanning out on the pillow as she looks up at you with those innocent yet lustful eyes.
You crawl over her, leaving a trail of hot kisses from her tummy up to her neck. Her hands explore your back, nails lightly scratching. When you grind your clothed erection against her core, she gasps.
"Can you feel how hard you make me?" You thrust against her again, making her whimper.
"Y-yes... I want to see it..." Her hands move to your belt, fumbling with the buckle.
You help her undo your pants, kicking them off along with your boxers. Your cock springs free, already rock hard and leaking precum. Miyeon's eyes widen as she takes in your size.
"Like what you see, princess?" You smirk as her hand wraps around your shaft, stroking experimentally.
"It's so big..." she whispers, thumb brushing over your sensitive tip. "Will it... fit?"
"We'll go nice and slow, baby. But first..." You hook your fingers in her panties, sliding them down her legs. You spread her creamy thighs wide apart, admiring how her pink pussy glistens with arousal. Her outer lips are puffy and swollen, inner folds glistening with her juices. The musky scent of her cunt makes your mouth water as you lean in closer. “Fuck, you're already so wet for me.”
"Please..." she whimpers, squirming under your intense gaze. "Stop teasing and lick me already!"
You give her a wicked grin before diving in, dragging your hot tongue through her dripping slit from bottom to top. The taste of her pussy explodes across your tongue - tangy and sweet like ripe fruit. She cries out and bucks her hips up into your face.
"Fuck! Your tongue feels so good!" Her fingers tangle in your hair as you focus on her clit, circling the swollen nub with firm strokes. You can feel it getting harder and more pronounced under your tongue.
Holding her thighs open wider, you bury your face deeper between her legs, eating her pussy like it's your last meal. Your tongue alternates between fucking into her tight hole and flicking rapidly over her clit. Wet sucking sounds fill the room as you devour her cunt.
Her pussy is absolutely drenched now, cream coating your chin as you feast on her. You slide two fingers into her clutching channel while continuing to assault her clit with your tongue. The walls of her cunt squeeze your digits hungrily.
"Holy shit, don't stop! Right there!" She grinds her pussy against your face, chasing her pleasure. "I'm getting so close already..."
You curl your fingers to massage her g-spot while sucking her clit between your lips. The combination has her writhing and moaning uncontrollably. Her thighs start to tremble as her orgasm builds.
You increase the pressure and speed, determined to make her cum hard on your tongue. Your fingers pump in and out of her sopping pussy while you flick her clit mercilessly. She's so wet that obscene squelching noises accompany each thrust of your fingers.
"Fuck fuck fuck! I'm gonna cum!" Her back arches off the bed as her climax hits. Her pussy clamps down on your fingers as waves of pleasure course through her. You keep licking and sucking, drawing out her orgasm until she pushes your head away.
But you're not done with her yet. Not so soon. As she lies there panting, you reposition yourself between her legs. Her pussy is still twitching with aftershocks when you dive back in, this time focusing solely on her sensitive clit.
"Wait! I just came—ahhhh!" Her protest turns into a moan as you suck her swollen clit between your lips. You can feel her trying to close her legs but you hold them open, continuing your relentless assault on her pussy.
The oversensitivity quickly transforms back into pleasure as you work her towards another orgasm. Your tongue swirls around her clit in tight circles while three fingers pump into her dripping hole. Her cream coats your hand as you finger-fuck her roughly.
"Oh god, I can't... it's too much!" But her hips are rocking against your face again, chasing the building pleasure. You can feel her pussy getting even wetter, if that's possible.
You alternate between broad strokes with your flattened tongue and quick flicks directly on her clit. Meanwhile your fingers curl to hit her g-spot with each thrust. The combination of stimulation has her climbing rapidly towards another peak.
Her moans get higher and more desperate as you drive her wild with your mouth and fingers. You can tell she's fighting the pleasure, still sensitive from her first orgasm. But you're determined to make her cum again.
"Please... I can't take it... gonna cum again!" Her thighs start shaking as her second orgasm approaches. You double down, sucking her clit firmly while hammering your fingers against her g-spot.
She screams as she cums, her pussy clamping down so hard on your fingers that you can barely move them. You keep your lips locked around her clit, sucking gently to draw out the intense pleasure.
When her orgasm finally subsides, you slowly withdraw your fingers from her quivering pussy. They're absolutely coated in her cream. You make eye contact as you lick them clean, savoring her tangy flavor.
"Holy shit..." Miyeon pants, still trembling. "That was incredible. I've never cum that hard before."
You smirk and dive right back in, making her yelp in surprise. Her clit is swollen and ultra-sensitive now, perfect for what you have planned. You flatten your tongue and lap at her pussy with long, slow strokes.
"No more, baby, I can't..." But her protests are weak and her hips are already moving against your mouth again. You can feel her getting wetter as you continue eating her out.
This time you take it slow, building her up gradually. Your tongue explores every fold and crease of her pussy, occasionally dipping into her hole to taste her essence. When you finally return attention to her clit, she's practically begging for it.
"Please... need to cum again..." Miyeon rocks desperately against your face, seeking more pressure. But you keep your touches light and teasing, driving her crazy with want.
You trace letters on her clit with the tip of your tongue, spelling out filthy words as she writhes beneath you. When you finally slide your fingers back into her clutching pussy, she moans in relief.
"Yes! Fuck me with your fingers while you eat my pussy!" Her dirty talk spurs you on as you pump three fingers into her dripping hole. Your tongue works her clit with firm, steady pressure.
Her pussy is absolutely gushing now, cream running down your wrist as you finger-fuck her roughly. The wet sounds of your fingers plunging into her cunt fill the room along with her desperate moans.
You curl your fingers to massage her g-spot while sucking her clit between your lips. The dual stimulation has her climbing rapidly towards another orgasm. Her thighs start trembling as she gets close.
"Gonna cum again! Don't stop, please don't stop!" She grinds her pussy against your face, chasing her pleasure. You increase the pressure and speed, determined to give her the most intense orgasm yet.
Her back lifts clear off the bed, her body trembling violently as the orgasm tears through her. Miyeon's cries of your name echo in the room, her voice breaking into a series of desperate whimpers. Her pussy clamps down on your fingers, pulsating in rhythm with the waves of pleasure crashing through her. Her hands clutch at the sheets, knuckles white, as her thighs twitch uncontrollably. You don’t let up, your fingers continuing to work her through every shuddering moment of ecstasy, curling and teasing until she lets out a sharp gasp and pushes your head back, her hips jerking away.
"Stop, stop! Too much," she pants, her chest rising and falling rapidly, her body glistening with sweat.
You lean back, watching her recover, her hair splayed out like a halo against the pillow. Her cheeks are flushed deep red, lips parted as she struggles to catch her breath. She drapes an arm over her face, giggling weakly. "Wow... that was—like—insane. I didn’t know you were this good with your hands."
“Take your time,” you say, your tone soft but teasing as your gaze roams her utterly wrecked form.
She peeks at you from beneath her arm, her eyes still hazy and unfocused. Her thighs quiver as she stretches her legs out, one hand brushing against her stomach as if grounding herself. “Okay, just give me a second,” she murmurs, her voice shaky, a tired smile playing at her lips.
While she lies there, basking in the aftershocks, you reach over to the nightstand. Your fingers brush against the foil packet, and you tear it open deliberately, watching her out of the corner of your eye. Her gaze snaps to you as you roll the condom onto your throbbing cock, her pupils dilating slightly.
"Already?" she whispers, a flicker of excitement chasing away the exhaustion in her expression. You smirk, positioning yourself above her, letting her feel the heat of your body pressing against hers.
"Yes. Ready for me, princess?" You position yourself at her entrance, rubbing your tip through her folds.
She nods, pulling you down for a passionate kiss. You can feel her trembling with anticipation.
"Tell me if it's too much," you murmur against her lips as you start pushing in. The head pops past her tight entrance, making you both moan.
"Oh fuck... you're so big..." She bites her lip, adjusting to the stretch as you slowly feed more of your length into her.
You go inch by inch, letting her pussy accommodate your size. Her walls grip you like a vice, so hot and tight it takes all your control not to just slam in.
"That's it, baby, taking my cock so well..." You bottom out, fully sheathed in her warmth.
You stay still for a moment, letting her adjust while peppering kisses across her face and neck. When her hips start moving against you, you take it as your cue to move.
You start with a few slow, shallow thrusts, just to get her warmed up. Miyeon's moans are soft at first, but they grow louder with each push, urging you on. You can feel her nails digging into your back, her legs wrapping around your waist, pulling you deeper into her. The angle changes, and you hit something inside her that makes her cry out.
"Fuck, right there," she gasps. "Don't stop."
You don't plan to. You pick up the pace, your hips moving faster, your cock sliding in and out of her slick pussy. She's meeting your thrusts, her body arching up to take you deeper.
"Faster," she begs, her voice ragged. "Please fuck me faster."
You grip her hips, your fingers digging into her soft flesh. You start really giving it to her, your balls slapping against her ass with each stroke. The bed creaks beneath you, the headboard banging against the wall as you pound her tight pussy.
"You like that, huh?" you growl in her ear. "Like getting fucked hard by my big cock?"
"Yes!" she screams. "Oh god, yes! Your cock feels so fucking good inside me."
Her words dissolve into incoherent moans, her body writhing beneath you. You can feel her getting wetter, her cream coating your shaft and dripping down her ass, making a fucking mess of the sheets. You can see it glistening on your cock every time you pull out, can feel it easing the way as you slam back in.
You lean down, your teeth finding her neck, biting down as you fuck her even harder. She cries out, her body convulsing around you. You can feel her pussy clenching, her walls squeezing your cock.
"Fuck, you're close," you groan. "I can feel it."
"Yes," she pants. "I'm gonna cum again. I'm gonna cum all over your cock."
You can feel your own orgasm building, your balls drawing up tight. But you hold back, determined to make her cum first. You want to feel her lose control, want to feel her pussy milking your cock.
You reach between them, your fingers finding her clit. You rub it in tight circles, your cock still pounding into her. She screams, her body bucking, her pussy clamping down on you like a vice.
"Cum for me, baby," you growl. "Let me feel you cum all over my cock."
And she does. She cums hard, her body convulsing, her pussy pulsing around you. You can feel her cream coating your cock, can feel it dripping down your balls. You keep fucking her, drawing out her orgasm, making her cry out with each thrust. Gradually you slow down the pace, each time your cock goes deep inside her, it pulls out slowly, you stay at this teasing pace until she catches her breath, then when you finally pull your cock out of her, without warning, you lift her shapely leg, exposing her dripping pussy and those delicate feet with festive red toenails.
"What are you doing?" she asks, watching as you grip her ankle.
"I'm gonna worship every inch of you," you growl, bringing her foot closer to your face. "Your pretty little toes look too tasty to resist."
Miyeon giggles nervously. "Nobody's ever... Oh fuck!" she gasps as you take her big toe into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it. The polish is smooth against your tongue as you suck gently, watching her face for reactions.
"Does that feel good, baby?" You ask between licks. Her toes taste clean with just a hint of salt from sweat.
"Mmmhh... it's weird but... kinda nice," she admits, wiggling her toes against your tongue. You take two toes in your mouth now, sucking harder as your hand slides up her thigh.
"Your feet are fucking perfect," you tell her, kissing down to her arch. "Just like the rest of you." Your fingers find her pussy lips, already swollen and slick from earlier. You gather some of her wetness and start rubbing slow circles around her clit.
"Ohhh..." Miyeon moans, her leg trembling in your grip. You alternate between sucking her toes and licking long stripes up her sole while your fingers work her pussy. Her cream coats your digits as you slide two inside her tight channel.
"So wet for me," you growl. "I love how your pussy gets all creamy when you're turned on." You curl your fingers, finding that special spot that makes her whole body jerk.
"Fuck! Right there!" she cries out, grinding against your hand. You keep the pressure steady, pumping your fingers as you lavish attention on her feet. Her pussy clenches rhythmically around you.
"You gonna cum again for me?" you ask, increasing the pace of your fingers. "Gonna soak my hand with that sweet pussy?"
"Yes! Please don't stop!" Miyeon pants, her head thrashing on the pillow. You can feel her getting close, her inner walls fluttering. Just before she peaks, you withdraw your fingers, making her whine in protest.
"Not yet baby," you tease, releasing her foot. "I want to fuck you while I suck these pretty toes." You position yourself behind her, keeping her leg lifted. Your cock slides easily through her folds, gathering her wetness.
"Please," she begs. "I need you inside me..."
You press just the tip against her entrance, making her squirm.
"Tell me how bad you want it."
"Please, baby, I need to feel your big cock deep in my pussy! Please fuck me... I'm so empty..."
Unable to resist her pleading, you thrust forward, burying your full length in her tight heat. "Fuuuck," you groan. "Your pussy feels amazing." You start a steady rhythm, not too fast yet, wanting to build her up slowly.
Miyeon moans with each thrust, her pussy gripping you perfectly. You capture her toes in your mouth again, sucking hard as you fuck her. The dual stimulation has her writhing.
"Oh god... that's so... unngh!" She can barely form words as pleasure overwhelms her. You increase your pace gradually, driving deeper. Her cream coats your shaft, making obscene wet sounds with each stroke.
"You like having your toes sucked while I fuck this tight pussy?" you ask, releasing her foot momentarily. "Such a good girl, taking my cock so well."
"Yes! Love it... love your cock..." she gasps. You've never heard her talk so dirty before. It spurs you on, making you thrust harder.
Her pussy starts clenching erratically around you as you pound into her. You can tell she's getting close again. This time you don't let up, determined to make her cum hard.
"Something's happening..." Miyeon pants suddenly. "Feels different... like I need to pee..."
"That's it baby," you encourage her. "Don't fight it. Let go for me." You redouble your efforts, angling your hips to hit her g-spot with each thrust while sucking her toes enthusiastically.
"But... unngh... I can't..." she protests weakly, even as her body tenses up.
"Yes, you can! Cum for me Miyeon. Fucking squirt all over my cock!" You slam into her faster, feeling her pussy spasm around you.
"Oh god, oh god, OH FUCK!" Miyeon screams as the dam finally breaks. Clear fluid gushes from around your cock, soaking the sheets beneath you. Her whole body convulses as she experiences her first squirting orgasm.
You keep thrusting through her release, prolonging it as much as possible. More fluid spurts out with each stroke as she trembles uncontrollably.
"That's it baby, let it all out," you growl around her toes. "So fucking hot watching you squirt."
Miyeon can only moan incoherently as waves of pleasure crash over her. Her pussy clamps down so hard it nearly pushes you out, but you maintain your rhythm until her orgasm finally starts to subside.
You gently release her foot and slow your thrusts, giving her time to catch her breath. She looks absolutely wrecked in the best way possible.
"Holy shit," she pants when she can speak again. "What... what was that?"
You chuckle, still buried deep inside her quivering pussy. "That was you squirting, baby. Felt good, didn't it?"
She nods weakly. "Amazing... I didn't know I could do that..."
"Oh we're just getting started," you promise with a wicked grin. "Now that I know how to make you squirt, I'm gonna make you do it again and again..."
Miyeon whimpers at your words, her pussy clenching around you. You can feel she's still sensitive, but also still aroused.
Perfect.
"Ready?" you ask, starting to move inside her again. She moans in response as you lift her foot back to your mouth...
Your cock slides easily through her creamy folds as you build up a steady rhythm once more. Miyeon's moans get louder with each thrust, her oversensitive pussy gripping you like a vice.
"Such a good girl," you praise her between licks to her foot. "Taking my cock so well after that huge orgasm."
"Feels so good," she gasps. "Everything's so sensitive..."
You angle your hips to hit her g-spot again, making her whole body jerk. "Think you can squirt for me again?" You ask, increasing your pace slightly.
"I... unngh... maybe?" Miyeon pants. "Still feels like I might pee..."
"That's normal, baby. Just let it happen." You suck her big toe into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it as you fuck her deeper. Her cream coats your shaft, dripping down onto the already soaked sheets.
"Oh fuck... oh fuck..." she chants as the pleasure builds. You can feel her starting to tense up again, her inner walls fluttering around your cock.
"That's it," you encourage her. "Let go for me. Show me what a good little squirter you are."
Your words push her over the edge. With a sharp cry, Miyeon's pussy contracts hard and another gush of clear fluid sprays out around your cock.
"Fuck yes!" You growl, maintaining your rhythm as she squirts. "So fucking hot watching you lose control like this."
Wave after wave of pleasure rocks through her body as you continue fucking her through the intense orgasm. Her toes curl against your tongue as more fluid spurts out with each thrust.
When her release finally subsides, Miyeon lies there trembling and gasping for air. You slow your pace but don't stop completely, knowing you can wring at least one more orgasm from her oversensitive body.
"Please..." she whimpers, her body trembling beneath you. "It's too much... I can't..."
"Shh, baby," you murmur, your voice steady and firm. "You can take it. You can take everything I give you." You slow your thrusts a little more, letting her catch her breath, but not enough to let her come down from the peak. "You've got one more in you. I know you do."
She shakes her head, her hair sticking to her sweat-slicked face. "No, I can't... I can't..."
"You can," you insist, your cock still moving inside her, stirring up her pleasure again. "You're a fucking goddess, Miyeon. You can take every inch of my cock. You can cum all over it again."
You increase your speed, your hips moving faster, your cock hitting that spot inside her that makes her scream. You can feel her pussy clenching around you, trying to keep you in, trying to milk you.
"Oh god," she moans, her voice rising in pitch. "Oh god, oh god, oh god..."
"That's it, baby," you growl. "Feel that? Feel my cock hitting your g-spot? You're gonna cum for me again. You're gonna squirt all over my cock."
"I'm so close... I'm so clo—OH GOD!" she cries out, her body tensing, her pussy gripping you like a vice.
You can feel her right on the edge, her body coiled tight, ready to snap. You lean down, your teeth finding her earlobe, biting down just hard enough to send a shockwave through her.
"Cum for me, Miyeon," you command, your voice low and rough. "Fucking let go. Let me feel that pussy explode. Let me see that squirt. Do it, baby. Fucking do it now."
She screams, her body convulsing, her eyes rolling back in her head. "I'm cumm—AAAAH!"
You can feel it, hot and wet, gushing out of her, coating your cock, dripping down your balls. You keep fucking her, drawing out her orgasm, making her scream with each thrust.
"That's it, baby," you groan. "Fuck, that's so good. You're squirting all over my cock. You're such a good girl, Miyeon. Such a fucking good girl."
Her body is shaking, her pussy still pulsing around you. You slow your thrusts, letting her ride out her orgasm, letting her come down slowly. You're about to cum, right on the edge, but you hold back again. This is about her.
This is about Miyeon.
You gently pull out of her, your cock still hard and glistening with her cum. You move down her body, your tongue tracing a path down her stomach, down to her pussy, your hands stroking her thighs, your touch gentle and soothing.
The bed beneath her is a fucking mess—sheets soaked through, the scent of sex heavy in the air. You can see the wet spot spreading, a testament to her pleasure.
"Fuck, baby," you murmur, your voice soft but filled with awe. "Look at this mess you made. You're so fucking sexy."
Miyeon's breath hitches as she looks down at the wet sheets, her eyes wide with a mix of shock and satisfaction. "I... I didn't know I could do that," she admits, her voice shaky. "It felt... god, it felt so fucking good."
You smile, your fingers tracing patterns on her inner thighs, feeling the slickness of her cum. "You squirted, baby. You fucking squirted all over my cock. It was the hottest thing I've ever seen."
She shivers, her body still sensitive from the intense orgasm. "I've never... I've never felt anything like that before. It was like... like my whole body just let go."
You lean in, your tongue lapping at her pussy, tasting her, cleaning her up. She jolts, her hips bucking slightly, but you hold her steady, your hands gripping her thighs.
"Shh, baby," you soothe. "Let me take care of you. Let me clean you up."
She relaxes, her body melting into the bed as you take your time, your tongue exploring every inch of her pussy. You can feel her shivering, her body responding to your touch. The taste of her is intoxicating, a mix of sweet and salty, pure fucking heaven.
"You taste so fucking good, Miyeon," you murmur, your voice low and husky. "I could do this all fucking night."
She moans softly, her fingers tangling in your hair. "It feels so good... I can't believe I did that. I can't believe I squirted."
You look up at her, your eyes meeting hers. She's watching you, her eyes soft and hazy with pleasure. You smile, your tongue giving her one last lick.
"You're so fucking beautiful, Miyeon," you whisper. "God, you're so fucking perfect…"
"But you haven't come yet," she suddenly notes.
"You're right. And where do you want my cum, princess?" You ask.
"On my face... want to taste you..."
"Fuck... Okay. Yeah, right. Get on your knees, baby,” you ask her as you quickly remove the condom.
Miyeon looks up at you with those innocent eyes as she kneels before you, her pretty face flushed with arousal. Her lips are already swollen from all the kissing, making them look even more cock-hungry than usual. You grab a fistful of her silky black hair, guiding her face closer to your throbbing shaft.
"Open that pretty mouth for me baby," you command, tapping your cock head against her plump lips. "I want to see how deep you can take it."
She parts her lips obediently, sticking out her pink tongue to lap at your sensitive tip. The sight of your precum glistening on her tongue makes your cock throb with need. You slowly feed her more of your length, watching in satisfaction as her lips stretch around your girth.
"Mmmmph," she moans around your cock, her eyes fluttering closed in pleasure. She clearly loves having her mouth filled, eagerly sucking and slurping as you push deeper.
You start with slow, shallow thrusts, letting her get used to your size. Her tongue swirls expertly around your shaft as you slide in and out between those perfect lips. Wet sucking sounds fill the room along with her muffled moans.
"That's it baby, take my cock," you growl, tightening your grip in her hair. "Your mouth feels so fucking good."
She responds by taking you deeper, relaxing her throat to accommodate more of your length. Tears form in the corners of her eyes as you hit the back of her throat, but she doesn't pull away.
If anything, she seems even more eager.
You pick up the pace slightly, fucking her mouth with measured strokes. Her lipstick is getting smeared all over your cock, marking it with traces of red. The sight of her face getting messy already has your balls tightening.
"Such a good little cocksucker," you praise, watching her cheeks hollow with suction. "You love having your pretty face fucked don't you?"
She nods as best she can with your cock stuffed in her mouth, humming in agreement. The vibrations send pleasure shooting through your shaft.
You pull out briefly to let her catch her breath, a string of saliva connecting her lips to your cock head. She gasps for air but immediately opens wide again, eager for more. Her face is already a mess of smeared makeup and drool.
"Please fuck my face harder," she begs, voice hoarse. "I want you to use my mouth like a pussy."
You don't need to be asked twice. Gripping her head firmly with both hands, you slam your cock back between her lips. This time you don't hold back, setting a brutal pace as you fuck her throat. She gags and chokes but takes it like a champ, her eyes watering heavily.
The wet sounds of her throat getting pounded are absolutely obscene. Drool runs down her chin and neck as you use her mouth roughly. Her hands grip your thighs for support but she doesn't try to pull away or slow you down.
"Fuck yes, take that cock," you grunt, watching your shaft disappear repeatedly into her willing mouth. "Going to paint that pretty face white soon."
She moans eagerly around your length, clearly excited by the promise of a facial. You can feel your orgasm building as her throat muscles massage your sensitive head.
Your thrusts become more erratic as you get closer to the edge. Her face is an absolute mess now - mascara running down her cheeks, lipstick completely ruined, drool everywhere. She looks utterly debauched and you haven't even cum yet.
"Get ready baby," you warn, feeling your balls tighten. "Going to cover that beautiful face."
You pull out just in time, the slick heat of her lips giving way as you grip your shaft tightly, aiming at Miyeon's upturned face. Her mouth is already open, tongue stretched out, her eyes locked on yours with a look of pure, desperate need. "Give it to me," she breathes, her voice thick with anticipation. The sight of her waiting so hungrily for your release sends a jolt through you, your cock twitching violently in your hand.
With a guttural groan, you let go, the first rope of hot cum splattering across her forehead and sliding down to her nose. She gasps softly, her breath hitching as the next thick jet paints her cheek, followed by another streaking across the bridge of her nose. Your hand works your shaft steadily, aiming with intent, making sure to glaze her perfect lips thoroughly, the creamy mess dripping onto her tongue as she moans in satisfaction.
She doesn’t flinch—if anything, she leans into it, her tongue sweeping over her lips, savoring every drop that lands in her mouth. You’re relentless, emptying yourself onto her until her face is a masterpiece of your desire, every inch of her skin marked with your seed. Thick streaks cling to her lashes, a stray drop dangling precariously from her chin before falling onto her chest. By the time you're finished, she’s a vision of debauched perfection, her flushed cheeks and parted lips framed by the glistening evidence of your climax.
"Fuck," you mutter, your voice hoarse as you admire her. "Look at you. My perfect, filthy girl."
She moans softly, tilting her head as you bring your cock closer, your tip still sensitive but eager for more. Slowly, deliberately, you use your softening length to spread the mess across her skin. You smear the cum over her cheeks, tracing her jawline, rubbing it into her lips before sliding down to her chin. She stays perfectly still, her eyes closed, a serene smile tugging at her mouth as she basks in the attention.
“You’re so fucking beautiful like this,” you whisper, your voice thick with awe. “That pretty face deserves to be covered in my cum every day.”
Her lashes flutter as she peeks up at you, her voice soft but dripping with satisfaction. “I’ll let you paint me whenever you want. I love how it feels... so warm, so dirty.”
Your thumb moves to her lips, smearing the last of the cum over them before pushing lightly into her mouth. She sucks on it obediently, her tongue flicking against your skin, her moan vibrating through your thumb.
When you finally pull back, you grab a handful of tissues, leaning down to clean her face. You start gently, dabbing at her cheeks and lips, but you can’t help but pause to admire her wrecked state—the messy hair, her flushed skin, her swollen, cock-bruised lips. Even as you clean her, the heat between you lingers, your touch lingering on her skin as she smiles up at you.
"You’re mine, Miyeon," you blurt out unconsciously, but there’s no mistaking the edge in your voice.
"Yours," she repeats, her voice a dreamy whisper. "Yeah, I'm yours.”
After changing the sheets on the bed, you both collapse onto the fresh, clean mattress, exhausted but content. You pull Miyeon close, her body fitting perfectly against yours as you snuggle together. The room is quiet, the only sound the soft hum of the city outside the window.
Miyeon props herself up on an elbow, looking down at you with those dark, beautiful eyes. "So... this isn't just a one-time thing, right?" she asks, her voice soft but hopeful.
You pull her in for a kiss, your lips lingering on hers. "Definitely not," you murmur against her mouth. "Unless you want it to be?"
"No!" she says quickly, then blushes, her cheeks turning a cute shade of pink. "I mean... I really like you. Like, really really like you."
You smile, your heart swelling in your chest. "Good, because I really really like you too," you say. "Even when you're not dressed as an elf."
She groans, hiding her face in your neck. "Are you ever going to let me live that down?" she mumbles, her voice muffled.
You chuckle, your arms tightening around her. "Nope. It's how we met, it's part of our love story now."
She goes still in your arms, her body tensing slightly.
"Love story?" She asks
Shit. Too soon? You think to yourself, wondering if you've fucked up. But then she's beaming up at you with that bright smile that first caught your attention, her eyes sparkling with happiness.
"Yeah," you say softly. "Love story."
She kisses you again, pouring all her feelings into it. When she pulls back, her eyes are sparkling with happy tears. "Best Christmas present ever," she declares, her voice filled with joy.
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sturniolosblanket · 6 days ago
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texts w/ brothers bsf!matt + drabble
pt. 5
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it had been two days since you last talked to matt. you didn’t want to admit the fact that him sleeping with another girl pissed you off. you didn’t want it to mess with you as bad as it did.
with you and matt being apart you realized how much you pained in his absence. how you ached for his touch. you would do anything to hear his voice, his laugh, even his moans and whimpers. you missed everything.
it didn’t take long for nate to notice something was wrong. he wasn’t going to push you, but he didn’t like seeing you like this, so after you came home from class one day he decided to check on you.
“hi.” nate said standing at your door, not moving so he doesn’t strike a nerve.
“uhhh hi?”
“are you um.. like okay?” he leaned against your door frame.
you sat up on your bed and crossed your legs, pulling a pillow to your chest, “i don’t know.”
“you know you can talk to me right?”
“no” you said half joking
“cmon don’t be a smart ass, i’m here for you y/n. you can talk to me about whatever is wrong.” he said tilting his head.
seeing your brother desperate for a reason as to why your acting so off broke your heart. you wanted so badly to tell him, to confess all your actions and sob to him about his horrible friend.
“i..” you start thinking about if you really want to risk matt losing his best friend, and your brother hating you, “i don’t think you wanna hear what’s wrong.”
“what is it a boy?” he asked chuckling
“um yeah actually,” it wasn’t a lie but somehow felt like it.
“oh, well you don’t need a boyfriend anyways.” he said shrugging
“it wasn’t a boyfriend nate,” you said your voice starting to tremble
“you wanted him to be?” he said hesitantly taking a step into your room
you thought about the question for a second. you yourself didn’t know the answer to the question. you knew you had a crush on matt, you had ever since your were little, but a relationship? you had always thought of it more as ‘friends with benefits’ but the more you thought about it, the more you realize how intense your feelings for him were.
“are you like in love or something?” he asked breaking the silence from his previous question.
were you in love with matt?? you didn’t think you were. i mean, he’s a fuckboy and your brothers best friend. sure you guys had amazing sex, you love his dick, the noises he makes, how dominant he is, and how good he was at it. sure he was funny, you loved his corny pick up lines, his stupid jokes, and his laugh. sure he was a good person, you loved how deeply he cares for his brothers, how he would listen to you anytime you were upset, and how well he treated your brother. you loved everything about matt, but you weren’t in love with matt, were you??
“i don’t know” you simply replied to your brother.
“well do you wanna go for a drive?? clear your mind??” nate suggests
“sure. thanks.” you smiled up at him. he just nodded at your turning around to walk out of your room.
“i’ll be in the car.”
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matt’s pov
the truth was, being away from her fucking sucked. i wanted to text, but i didn’t want to push her. i only hooked up with another girl to hide my feelings from myself. having feelings for someone wasn’t normal for me. usually i can fuck someone without catching feelings easily, so when i realized i felt something for y/n, i fucking someone else to get her out of my head.
fucking someone else only managed to make things worse. the whole time all i could think about was her. no one felt like her, sounds like her, tastes like her. she was unique. she was herself, and that was what i liked about her.
the past two days i spent trying to get her out of my mind, but everything reminded me of her. something as simple as her favorite show coming on the tv would fuck with my mood. i tried seeing other girls, but i couldn’t bring myself to even touch anyone else. it all felt to weird, weird it wasn’t her i was touching.
nate had told me that she was acting different. that she wasn’t coming out of her room, and wasn’t really talking to anyone. that broke my heart. she’s hurting because of me. i hurt her. i hated that, but what i hated more was i couldn’t bring myself to apologize.
i was seated one the couch of a party, alone. i wasn’t particularly looking for anyone to hook up with, so when a girl came up and planted herself on my lap i thought about turning her away, but i didn’t. it felt weird, almost like i was cheating even though i knew i wasn’t. knowing how bad she was already hurting made it feel like i was doing something wrong, even though i knew i wasnt. but was i?
“you got a girlfriend or something, baby?” she whispered in my ear
“no”
“then touch me.” she said grinding herself on me.
she leaned down placing a kiss on my lips. she deepened the kiss, grazing her tongue on my bottom lip. she pushed her tongue into my mouth, trying to fight for dominance, but i barley reciprocated so she easily won. the only thing i could think of was wishing it was y/n.
“yo yo yo” i heard a familiar voice say. i pulled away searching for nate. i found him greeting our other friends before he spotted me.
“yo what’s up, matt.” he said dabbing me up.
when i looked behind him i saw her. staring at me, staring at the girl on me. she watched her hands explore my body, snaking up into my hair, falling onto my chest. she leaned in to kiss me again, but i swerved her only being able to focus my attention on y/n.
“are you in love with her or something? i thought you didn’t have a girlfriend?” the girl spoke up staring over at y/n
her question hit me like a truck. i never missed a girl this much in my life, i never felt sad over a girls absence, but for some reason i wanted her to come back to me like crazy.
i tried my best to hide these feelings from myself, but i couldn’t. i loved the way her hair smelt, the way her eyes crinkle when she laughs, the way she tenses up under my touch. sure i loved certain things about her, but i wasn’t in love with her. was i?
y/n looked like she had seen a ghost. it was like she snapped out of a trance, and she suddenly booked it for the front door. i pushed the girl off me and ran after her, but by the time i got to the front door, she was no where to be found. she wasn’t outside, in the bathrooms, up stairs, downstairs, gone. fuck
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xoxo, isa
a/n: sorry:,( comment ‘❄️’ to be added to my taglist and i’ll add you!🩵
taglist: @matteatmeout @littlefreak-liz @mattsplaything @kayla-hearts4sturniolo @isasflorals @harls-sturn @h3arts4harry @rcklessheavn @chrissysturnzz @rafesapprentice @mattysketchup @imobsessedwithtaylorswift @emely9274 @trvqvoiisee @heartsforsturniolo567 @rafecameronsbitch @annsx03 @slutmattout @trevorsturniolo @h3arts4nat @beersangel @sturniolosluttt @sturnzpro @slutmattout @rainebow333 @nmegamett20 @ivysturnss
dividers by: @bernardsbendystraws
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aliyahwritings · 2 months ago
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THE CONTRACTED HEART — Rafe Cameron (09)
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MASTERLIST | Basketball Player & Model!Female Reader
Summary: Rafe Cameron, a basketball star, needs a marriage to fix his image, while Model!Reader needs one for citizenship. They may be the perfect solution for each other.
Warnings: smut, descriptions of violence, jealousy, usage of drugs, talks about body image/ed, angst, and lots of bickering. Reader is confident, a people-pleaser, has a traumatic past, and is a sunshine with an attitude. Rafe is a whore, possessive, cocky, and secretive about his past.
Word Count: 4.7k
Aliyah's Notes: y'all are getting fed cause this chapter and the next one are gonna be cute asf so enjoy :)
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Three days before the engagement party felt like an endless marathon, with every hour packed to the brim with decisions and errands. The morning started early—too early for your liking—as Aisha and Nina practically dragged you out of bed.
Nina, ever the “mom” of the group, had already prepared an itinerary. She stood in the kitchen, arms crossed, her phone in hand, while you slumped in a chair, still clinging to the remnants of sleep. “Alright, ladies,” Nina began, her tone brisk, “we’ve got a packed schedule. Venue first, then flowers, then caterers. We’ll fit in the designer appointment after lunch, assuming someone,” her eyes flicked pointedly toward you, “doesn’t take forever to make decisions.”
Aisha smirked, sipping her coffee as she leaned against the counter. “You know she’ll take forever. She was debating the color of napkins for twenty minutes for her birthday party.”
“Because they matter!” you protested, sitting up straighter, your natural energy kicking in. “The wrong napkin can throw off the entire table aesthetic. Imagine gold chargers with plain white napkins—horrible!”
Aisha groaned dramatically, while Nina pinched the bridge of her nose. “God give me strength,” Nina muttered in Tagalog under her breath before clapping her hands. “Alright, let’s move. The decorator is expecting us in twenty minutes, and I’m not letting us be late.”
The three of you piled into Nina’s car, and the drive to the venue was filled with your endless chatter. You couldn’t help yourself; you were excited. Ever since your night at Rafe’s, you’ve been walking around with a weight lift off your shoulders, and a smile on your face. “Okay, but seriously, do you think white and gold is too basic? Should I add a pop of color? Like blush pink? Or emerald green! Oh, that could be so chic—”
“Breathe, Miss. Yapper,” Aisha interrupted, shooting you a look from the front seat. “You’ve already settled on white and gold. Don’t backtrack now.”
“She’s just overthinking again,” Nina said from the driver’s seat, her voice calm but firm. “You always do this, sweetie. Just trust your instincts. They’re good… most of the time.”
“Most of the time?!” you repeated, feigning offense.
“Girl, you’re the one who almost ordered heart-shaped balloons for your ex’s retirement party,” your best friend deadpanned.
“He always complained about his job, alright! I thought he was happy to retire.”
The two of them burst into laughter, and you couldn’t help but join in. They always knew how to make you laugh, even when your perfectionism threatened to take over.
When you arrived at the venue, the decorator was already waiting, surrounded by samples of linens, centerpieces, and lighting options. The grand ballroom looked beautiful even in its unfinished state, with its high ceilings and floor-to-ceiling windows letting in streams of sunlight. But you could already see a million tiny things that needed to be fixed or adjusted.
Nina took charge of logistics, confirming delivery times and setups with the decorator, while Aisha kept you in check. Every time you tried to change something—a table arrangement here, a floral display there—Aisha would cross her arms and give you a warning glare.
“Focus, Y/N. You’re going to drive this poor decorator insane,” Aisha muttered as you debated, for the third time, whether the table runners should have a satin or matte finish.
“It’s not insane to want things to be perfect,” you argued, though your voice was tinged with doubt.
“It’s insane when you’re deciding between two things that look exactly the same,” Aisha countered.
“Pale beige and normal beige are completely different—”
Nina swooped in to mediate, her tone soothing. “Look, kids, both options are gorgeous. Y/N, pick one and move on. We still have three more stops today.”
You sighed, finally nodding and pointing to the matte finish. The decorator gave you a grateful smile, and you moved on to the next decision.
By the time you left the venue, your head was spinning, but there was no time to slow down. The next stop was the florist, where the three of you pored over bouquets and arrangements.
“Peonies are elegant, but are they too soft for the theme?” you mused aloud, holding up a sample.
“Peonies are fine,” Nina assured you, already checking her phone for the next appointment.
“Roses are boring,” Aisha chimed in, inspecting a cluster of orchids. “But these could work. They’re dramatic. Like you.”
You stuck your tongue out at her, earning a rare laugh from Nina. “She’s not wrong,” Nina said with a small smile.
The florist walked you through the arrangements, but your perfectionism struck again. You wanted everything to complement the aesthetic without feeling overdone. Nina stepped in when she sensed you starting to spiral.
“Y/N, just pick a theme and stick with it,” she said gently but firmly. “You can’t have every flower in the world at your party. Less is more.”
Aisha nodded in agreement. “Listen to her. She’s right. For once.”
Nina rolled her eyes but didn’t dignify the comment with a response.
Eventually, you settled on a mix of peonies, orchids, and eucalyptus, feeling a little more confident as you left the florist.
Lunch was a quick stop at a café, where you barely had time to scarf down a sandwich before heading to your next appointment. The designer fitting was a whirlwind of fabrics, sequins, and pins, with you trying on dress after dress while Nina and Aisha offered their unfiltered opinions.
By the end of the day, you were utterly spent. You stumbled through the door of your apartment, exhaustion hit you like a ton of bricks. You kicked off your heels, letting them clatter onto the floor, and flopped onto the couch with a moan. Your feet ached, your head was pounding, and the thought of the work you have for tomorrow made you want to cry.
Just as you were debating whether to order takeout or crawl into bed and call it a night. Your phone buzzed—-your new phone that you bought yesterday after losing your original one and your keys at the charity event—-on the coffee table. You reached for it, squinting at the screen.
Rafe: “Longest. Day. Ever.”
A small smile tugged at your lips despite your fatigue. You propped yourself up against the armrest and typed back.
You: “Tell me about it. I’m so dead! Who knew choosing flowers could feel like a full-body workout?”
His response came almost immediately.
Rafe: “Yeah? Well, at least you didn’t have to run for AN HOUR!!! My legs feel like they’re about to give up on me.”
You: “Poor baby. Want me to send you a trophy for Most Exhausted Future Fiancé-to-Be?”
Rafe: “Ha. Ha. So funny.”
Rafe: “Are you sure we’re not married yet? You already sound like a nagging wife.”
The audacity of him made you chuckle and roll your eyes. You typed quickly, unable to help yourself.
You: “Excuse you? If I’m a nagging wife, then you’re a whiny husband.”
Rafe: “Whatever you say, nagging wife.”
You let out a quiet laugh, shaking your head as you sank further into the couch. The teasing back-and-forth was an oddly comforting way to unwind after such a chaotic day.
You: “Seriously though, did you at least eat? Or are you surviving off your ego again?”
Rafe: “Does a protein bar and water count?”
You groaned audibly, your fingers flying across the screen.
You: “No, Rafe. A protein bar and water do NOT count. A protein bar is not food; it’s a snack. Please tell me you’ve got something decent in your fridge.”
Rafe: “Define ‘decent’…”
You: “I’m going to kill you.”
Rafe: “That’s very romantic, baby, but you’re avoiding the question. What’s the verdict? Is my fridge decent enough for you, Your Honor?”
You: “No.”
You: “Knowing you, it’s probably full of water bottles, expired vegetables, and mystery leftovers. Am I wrong?”
Rafe: “I don’t like this attack on my character.”
You: “Answer the question, Cameron.”
Rafe: “Fine. Maybe you’re right. I don’t have the energy to argue. Or to cook, for that matter.”
You sighed again, a twinge of concern sneaking past your teasing. You guessed he pushed himself hard during training, but the least he could do was take care of himself after.
You: “Alright, what do you feel like eating? I’ll bring you something.”
Rafe: “What? No. You just spent all day running around. You don’t have to do that.”
You: “Too late. I offered, and I’m not taking it back. So, what’ll it be?”
Rafe: “...You’re really doing this, huh?”
You: “Absolutely.”
Rafe: “Fine. Surprise me. Just nothing too fancy. I’m starving.”
You: “Got it. Be there in an hour.”
Rafe: “Angel.”
Shaking your head, you pocketed your phone and headed to the kitchen. After a quick assessment of what you had on hand, you decided on a simple but satisfying dish: chicken biryani. 
Cooking helped you relax after the chaotic day. The process of measuring spices, chopping onions, and stirring the pot grounded you, your mind focused on creating something warm and filling. By the time the dish was done, the air was fragrant with the scent of saffron, cardamom, and cloves.
You packed the biryani into a container, added a side of pudding kheer for balance, and grabbed some naan for good measure. After a quick freshen-up, you were on your way to Rafe’s penthouse.
When he opened the door, the sight of him hit you like a punch to the gut. Rafe stood there in low-hanging sweatpants that clung to his hips, no shirt in sight, leaving every inch of his toned chest and sculpted abs on full display. His damp hair was a tousled mess, drops of water clinging to his skin, catching the light as they slid down the defined lines of his torso. He leaned casually against the doorframe, his gaze raking over you with a mix of cocky amusement and exhaustion. The lazy grin tugging at his lips was enough to make your pulse stutter—and the way his voice dipped, low and teasing, when he finally spoke didn’t help. 
“Well, well,” he drawled. “Look who showed up. My nagging wife bearing gifts.”
You rolled your eyes, forcing yourself to focus on the container in your hands instead of his sexy, very sexy abs. “You want dinner or not, Cameron? ‘Cause I can take it back?”
He instantly straightened up. “Come in, Your Honor,” he stepped aside to let you in, his grin widening when he saw the bag in your hand.
The penthouse was dimly lit, the warm glow of the city skyline visible through the floor-to-ceiling windows. You set the food on the kitchen island, trying to ignore the way he was watching you with that infuriating smirk.
You looked at your attire, and rolled your eyes. “Stop staring at my ass and grab plates,” you ordered, sounding stern.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, clearly amused, but he obeyed.
The two of you sat at the island, the meal between you. You put your hair in a bun, and said; “So, this is chicken biryani—” you pointed to it. “—and this is kheer and some naan.”
“This looks amazing, Y/N,” he let out a groan of appreciation.
You blushed at the compliment. “Thank you. You ever had Asian food before?”
“I had sushi and ramen with my team—”
You chuckled. “I meant South Asian food, Rafe.”
“Oh. South Asian…”
“Yeah,” you nodded. “You know, Indian, Sri Lankan, Pakistani, etc… Did you?”
He shook his head. “I don’t remember. I eat basic white man food, to be honest.”
“I realized,” you laughed. “Well, eat well.”
Rafe took his first bite, and his eyes widened. “Yo! This is delicious, what the fuck?”
You smiled, watching as he devoured the food like he hadn’t eaten in days. “Told you protein bars wouldn’t cut it—”
“You’re not going to eat?”
“I already ate,” you lied.
“Bullshit,” he said, giving you a pointed look. “Have some with me. I don’t like eating alone.”
You hesitated for a moment before giving in, grabbing a fork and joining him. The two of you ate in companionable silence, the tension of the day melting away with each bite.
For a brief moment, it didn’t feel like you were preparing for an engagement party or navigating the complicated arrangement that had brought you together. It felt easy, natural—like something that didn’t require overthinking.
You stood at the sink, sleeves rolled up, rinsing off the plates and containers. Warm water rushed over your hands as you scrubbed away the remnants of biryani and naan. The scent of spices lingered in the air, a comforting reminder of the meal you’d shared. Behind you, Rafe leaned against the counter, his tall frame relaxed but his eyes fixed on you.
“You know,” he said, his voice cutting through the quiet hum of the faucet, “you really don’t have to do this.”
“You’ve said that already,” you replied without turning around, focusing instead on rinsing the plate in your hand.
“Because I mean it. I can clean tomorrow,” he quipped, folding his arms across his bare chest.
A chuckle escaped you, and you tossed him a look over your shoulder. “Some of us were raised to clean up immediately after eating. It’s a brown girl thing—no one leaves the kitchen messy in my house.”
Rafe raised an eyebrow, his lips curving into a smirk. “Ah, so it’s cultural?”
“Hell yeah,” you replied, turning back to the sink. “If my mom ever caught me walking away from a pile of dishes, I wouldn’t live to see another day.”
“Sounds intense,” he teased, though his tone was laced with curiosity.
“You’re just white,” you shot back, and he laughed. “But also… I kind of like it,” you admitted, your voice softer now. “It feels wrong to leave things undone. Like you’re disrespecting the meal or something.”
Rafe was quiet for a moment, and you could feel his gaze lingering on you, not with judgment but something that felt closer to admiration.
“You’re kind of incredible, you know that?” he said finally.
You blinked, caught off guard. “For doing the dishes? Your standards are low, Cameron.”
He laughed, the sound deep and genuine. “No, I mean… just in general. You don’t have to cook for me or clean up after me, but you do it anyway. And you don’t even make a big deal out of it. You’re just… thoughtful.”
His words made you pause, your hands still under the running water. For a man who often masked his feelings behind sarcasm and cockiness, the sincerity in his voice hit you harder than you expected.
“Well,” you said, trying to keep your tone light, “don’t get used to it. Just because I cleaned your kitchen tonight doesn’t mean I’m signing up to do it forever.”
Rafe grinned, stepping closer. “Noted. One-time deal.”
You rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you shut off the faucet and reached for the dish towel. “Besides, I wasn’t cleaning for you. I was cleaning for my own peace of mind.”
“Still,” he said, his voice dropping slightly, “thanks. For all of it.”
You glanced over at him, caught off guard again by the softness in his tone. The cocky grin he usually wore was replaced by something more subdued, more genuine. It made your chest tighten in a way you weren’t ready to think about.
“It’s not a big deal,” you said, your voice quieter now. “Just food and a few dishes.”
“To you, maybe,” he said, leaning against the counter beside you. “But it’s been a while since anyone’s done something like this for me. I don’t even know the last time I had an actual home-cooked meal.”
That admission tugged at something deep inside you, a mix of sympathy and affection you weren’t quite prepared for. You focused on folding the towel in your hands, hoping he wouldn’t notice the way your cheeks warmed.
“Well, someone has to make sure you don’t live off protein bars and bad decisions,” you said lightly, trying to steer the conversation back into familiar territory.
Rafe chuckled, the sound low and warm. “Guess I should count myself lucky it’s you.”
Your eyes flicked up to his, and for a moment, you forgot how to respond. The way he was looking at you—soft, unguarded, and almost reverent—made your heart skip a beat.
“Alright, stop,” you said, breaking the moment and brushing past him toward the counter. “You’re making it weird.”
“Making what weird?” he asked, following you with an amused grin.
“Everything,” you shot back, grabbing your bag. “And don’t think I didn’t notice you slacking off while I did all the work. Next time, you’re cleaning.”
“Deal,” he said, holding up his hands in mock surrender. “As long as there’s a next time.”
You hesitated at the door, looking back at him. His smirk was still there, but so was that softness in his eyes, the one that made it hard to look away. Bag slung over your shoulder and shoes slipped back on, ready to leave Rafe’s penthouse and head home for what was left of the night. The day had drained you, and though the quiet domestic moment you’d just shared with him was nice—unexpectedly so—you still needed to recharge for tomorrow’s chaos.
“You don’t have to leave yet,” he said, almost too casually, as if trying to disguise the sincerity in his tone.
You paused, glancing back at him. “Rafe, it’s late. I’m exhausted. You’re exhausted. We both need sleep.”
He shrugged, his mouth curling into that boyish grin that usually meant trouble. “So? Five more minutes won’t hurt. Sit down, relax. You’ve been running around all day.”
You narrowed your eyes at him but relented, curiosity getting the better of you. “Fine. Five minutes,” you muttered, dropping your bag onto the floor again and heading to the couch.
Rafe followed you, sitting on the other end of the couch, though he shifted closer. His arm rested along the backrest, his entire posture relaxed in a way that only made you more aware of him.
“So,” he began, his tone lighter now, “what did you actually do today? Besides fighting with tablecloths and flowers, I mean.”
You groaned, leaning back into the cushions. “It feels like that’s all I did. The decorators kept bringing me options that were either too tacky or too plain. And don’t even get me started on the florists. Nina kept trying to keep me on schedule, Aisha rolled her eyes at every single arrangement, and I was stuck in the middle.”
His laugh was low and warm. “Sounds like a nightmare.”
“It was,” you said, though there was a faint smile tugging at your lips now. “But somehow, it’s all starting to come together. Slowly. Painfully. I think we’re making progress.”
He tilted his head, watching you with that quiet intensity he always seemed to have when you weren’t paying attention. “You really care about this party, huh?”
You hesitated, the weight of his gaze making it harder to brush off the question. “Yeah, I guess I do,” you admitted softly. “I mean, if we don’t make it believable then I’d have to go back to my country, and I can’t let that happen.”
Rafe was silent for a moment, his eyes never leaving yours. The soft light in the room cast shadows across his face, making him look more vulnerable, less guarded than usual.
“You’re putting so much thought into it,” he said finally, his voice quieter now. “More than anyone else would, I think.”
You shrugged, your gaze dropping to your hands. “Just doing what needs to be done. Nothing special.”
“It is special,” he said, his tone firm but gentle.
The sincerity in his voice made your chest tighten. You glanced up at him, meeting his gaze for a moment that felt like it stretched on forever. There was something unspoken in his expression, something soft and unfamiliar that made your heart stutter.
“Okay, your turn,” you said quickly, needing to break the tension. “What did you do today, besides run yourself into the ground?”
His smirk returned, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Practice, drills, meetings. The usual.”
“You make it sound so thrilling,” you teased, crossing your arms.
“Oh, it’s a blast,” he said with mock enthusiasm. “Nothing like running suicides and lifting until your arms feel like they’re gonna fall off. And then sitting in a room listening to people tell you how to market yourself better.”
“Sounds glamorous,” you said, leaning back into the couch with a small laugh.
Rafe chuckled, his gaze softening as he watched you. “It’s not. But then again, you make flower arrangements sound like boot camp, so I guess we’re even.”
You smiled, letting the comfortable quiet settle between you for a moment. The hum of the city outside was faint but constant, a reminder of how late it had gotten.
“I should really go,” you said, breaking the silence and sitting up.
Rafe’s hand reached out, brushing against yours as he spoke. “You don’t have to.”
The softness in his voice caught you off guard, and for a moment, you stayed still, his fingers lingering near yours. The space between you suddenly felt smaller, charged with something neither of you were ready to name.
“Rafe,” you said gently, pulling your hand back, though your voice betrayed your hesitation.
“Stay a little longer,” he said, his eyes searching for yours. “This is… nice. Just sitting here. Talking.”
Your heart thudded in your chest at his words, and you looked away, pretending to straighten your bag. “I can’t. I’ve got another long day tomorrow, and so do you.”
He sighed but didn’t argue, leaning back into the couch. “Alright. But you owe me another five minutes next time.”
You laughed softly, shaking your head as you stood. “Sure, Cameron. I’ll pencil it into my busy schedule.”
He followed you to the door again, his presence warm and steady behind you. As you stepped into the hallway, you glanced back at him, your smile softer now.
As you moved toward the door, your bag slung over your shoulder, Rafe trailed behind you, his hands tucked casually into the pockets of his sweatpants. The quiet between you was comfortable, a marked contrast to the constant noise of the day. Just as you reached for the handle, his voice broke the silence.
“So… my dad called today,” he said, his tone light but deliberate.
You paused, turning slightly to glance at him, curiosity flickering in your expression. “Oh? What about?”
Rafe leaned against the frame, his posture deceptively relaxed. “He wanted to ask about you.”
The corners of your mouth lifted in a faint smirk. “Me? Why? Should I be flattered or scared?”
He chuckled, though it came with a hint of exasperation. “Because you’re about to be my wife, and you should definitely be flattered. He’s been… curious, I guess. You’re kind of a hot topic at the moment.”
Your brow furrowed as you adjusted the strap of your bag. “What do you mean?”
Rafe shrugged, though his eyes flickered to yours briefly before looking away. “He’s been asking when he and Rose can meet you. Sarah’s been on my case about it too. She wants to meet you again. It’s like they’re more excited about this whole engagement thing than I am.”
There was an edge to his words, not quite bitterness but something close to it, and you stepped back from the door slightly, your curiosity deepening. “Is that… a bad thing?”
“No, it’s not bad,” he said quickly, though his jaw tightened ever so slightly. “It’s just… predictable. My dad’s all about appearances, and this engagement makes us look good. You make me look good.”
His words were meant to sound casual, but the weight beneath them was unmistakable. You softened your tone as you leaned against the couch. “Rafe, if you’re not comfortable with all this, you can tell me. I’m not going to—”
“It’s not that,” he interrupted, shaking his head. “It’s just… complicated.”
You tilted your head, watching him carefully. “How so?”
He hesitated, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “My family has this way of… making everything feel like a performance. You know? Like, they’re not just happy about this engagement because it’s a good thing for me. They’re happy because it’s a good thing for them. My dad’s already talking about how it’ll ‘strengthen the Cameron name,’ and Rose keeps mentioning how much she ‘adores your poise.’”
You blinked at him, momentarily caught off guard. “Wait, your step-mother said that? About me?”
He laughed lightly, nodding. “Yeah. I think she’s obsessed with you already.”
You couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped you. “Wow. And here I thought winning over your dad would be the hard part.”
“Oh, don’t worry. He’ll grill you like a steak the second he gets a chance,” Rafe said, his tone teasing but his smile tinged with something softer. “He doesn’t trust anyone, especially not when it comes to me.”
You frowned at that, your arms crossing instinctively. “Why not? You’re… I mean, you’re his son. Shouldn’t he trust you the most?”
Rafe’s smile faltered for a split second before he masked it with another shrug. “Let’s just say my track record isn’t exactly spotless. And my dad… he’s always been more interested in results than reasons. This marriage? It’s a result he likes. That’s all.”
The raw honesty in his words caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didn’t know how to respond. Finally, you stepped closer, your voice quieter now. “Rafe, if this is too much—if your family’s involvement is making it harder—I can talk to them. Set boundaries or whatever.”
He shook his head, his eyes meeting yours. “You don’t have to do that. It’s not your problem to fix.”
“Maybe not,” you said, your gaze unwavering, “but it’s my problem now too.”
“Such a good wife already,” he caressed your cheeks softly, the corner of his mouth twitched, his smirk returning faintly. “You’re really taking this whole ‘teamwork’ thing seriously, huh?”
“I’m a perfectionist,” you replied, matching his tone. “Can’t help it.”
He chuckled, the tension in his shoulders easing slightly. “You’re too good at this, you know. My family’s already halfway in love with you, and you haven’t even met them yet.”
“Maybe I should be worried,” you teased, though there was a softness in your voice now.
“Don’t be,” he said, his tone quieter as he let his hand down your face. “If anything, they’re the ones who should be worried. You’re gonna walk in there, charm everyone without even trying, and leave me to deal with their unrealistic expectations.”
You laughed, the sound light and genuine, and Rafe found himself leaning just a little closer, caught up in the warmth of the moment.
“Well, if they’re anything like you,” you said, your voice still tinged with amusement, “I’m sure I’ll survive.”
Rafe’s smirk faltered for a moment, replaced by something softer, something you couldn’t quite name. “They’re nothing like me,” he said quietly, almost to himself.
The words hung in the air, and for a moment, neither of you moved. His gaze lingered on yours, steady and unguarded in a way that made your breath catch.
“Rafe…” you began, your voice trailing off as his expression shifted ever so slightly, something unreadable flickering across his face.
But just as quickly as the moment had come, it passed. He straightened, his usual smirk slipping back into place like a mask. “You should probably get some rest,” he said, his tone lighter now. “You’ve got a big day tomorrow.”
You blinked, startled by the sudden shift, but nodded. “Yeah. You too.”
He followed you to the door, his presence steady behind you as you stepped into the hallway. As you turned back to glance at him one last time, his expression softened again, his blue eyes holding yours for a beat longer than necessary.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” he said, his voice quieter now.
“Goodnight, Rafe,” you replied, your chest tightening slightly as you walked away, the weight of his gaze following you long after you’d gone.
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chapter ten
693 notes · View notes
shdysders · 2 months ago
Text
too late
pairing: jenna ortega and reader
summary: in which, after weeks of hesitation, you finally decide to tell jenna the truth—only to realize she has plans of her own.
word count: 7.1k
warnings: sensitive topic - lung cancer
authors note: in honor of november being lung cancer awareness month.
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It began with a cough.
Not the kind that comes and goes with a cold or allergies, but one that lingered—sharp, persistent, and out of place.
At first, you brushed it off, chalking it up to stress or the changing seasons. But days turned into weeks, and instead of fading, it seemed to grow heavier, like it was pulling something deep from your chest.
You'd ignored it longer than you should have, convincing yourself it was nothing.
Jenna had even teased you about it once or twice, her laughter light and dismissive as she handed you a bottle of water and told you to "take better care of yourself." You'd laughed along with her, but deep down, something about it unsettled you.
When the pain started—a dull ache beneath your ribs every time you took a deep breath—you knew you couldn't ignore it anymore.
That's when you made the call.
The appointment came and went in a blur.
The doctor had been kind but direct, asking questions you couldn't answer with certainty. How long had the symptoms persisted? Had you noticed anything else? Fatigue, weight loss? You'd nodded at some points, shook your head at others, feeling like each response was pulling you further into a place you didn't want to be.
"We'll run some tests," they'd said, their tone neutral, almost too neutral. "Just to be safe."
You'd left the office that day with a sinking feeling you couldn't quite explain, like a storm cloud had settled just over your shoulders. But even then, you told yourself it was nothing.
It had to be.
When the call came, days later, their voice was calm but edged with something you couldn't place.
The voice on the other end, professional but cautious, had asked if you could come in—today. It wasn't a suggestion; it was an urgency wrapped in sterile politeness, and that was when it hit you—that it wasn't nothing.
The drive to the clinic had felt like an eternity. The silence in the car had been unbearable, but every time you'd reached for the radio, your hand had fallen back into your lap. Music felt too loud, too intrusive, as if it would force you to acknowledge the knot in your stomach that had been tightening since the moment you hung up the phone.
The streets blurred past you, familiar landmarks losing their meaning. All you could focus on was the road ahead and the gnawing thought that something was wrong—something worse than you wanted to admit. Your hands had gripped the steering wheel so tightly your knuckles turned white, and at one point, you'd realized you were holding your breath without meaning to.
By the time you'd pulled into the clinic's parking lot, your chest ached—not just from the persistent cough but from the weight of your anxiety.
You'd sat there for a moment, staring at the sliding glass doors, wondering if you could just... drive away. Pretend the call never happened. Pretend nothing was wrong.
But then you'd thought of Jenna. Her face had flashed in your mind—her smile, the way she always seemed to know when something was bothering you, even when you tried to hide it. You couldn't hide this forever, and if you didn't walk in now, it would only get worse.
The waiting room had been quiet, save for the soft hum of a fish tank in the corner and the occasional murmur of voices. You'd checked in at the front desk, the receptionist's cheery smile making your stomach twist, and then found a seat near the window.
The minutes stretched on.
There had been an older man across from you, his hands trembling slightly as he flipped through a magazine he clearly wasn't reading. Beside him, a woman with a scarf tied around her head stared at the floor, her expression distant.
You couldn't stop wondering about their stories—what they were going through, what battles they were silently fighting. Compared to them, your cough and aches felt trivial, like you didn't belong in this space.
You'd convinced yourself, even as you sat there, that you were wasting everyone's time. That whatever was happening to you couldn't possibly be as bad as what these people were enduring.
Maybe it had been an overreaction to come at all, you thought, even though you knew deep down that wasn't true.
When your name was finally called, your heart jumped into your throat. You stood, legs feeling unsteady beneath you, and followed the nurse down a hallway that smelled faintly of disinfectant and something metallic.
She'd led you to a small room and asked you to wait for the doctor, her smile kind but fleeting, as if she knew what was coming.
The seconds ticked by in excruciating silence. Your eyes had scanned the walls, landing on a framed picture of a mountain range, a feeble attempt to make the space feel less clinical. It didn't work.
When the door opened, Dr. Patel had stepped in, clipboard in hand, his face calm but serious. He'd greeted you with a nod, his usual warmth muted, and gestured for you to sit.
You'd perched on the edge of the chair, your hands clenching and unclenching in your lap. Dr. Patel had sat across from you, his gaze steady but unreadable as he placed the clipboard on the desk.
"I wanted to go over the results of your tests," he'd begun, his voice measured, like he was trying to soften the blow before it landed.
He'd turned his computer screen toward you, the image of a scan glowing faintly against the dim light of the room. He'd pointed to an area on the scan, circling it with the cursor as he explained the findings.
The words he used were clinical, detached, but you caught enough to piece it together. Something about nodules, abnormalities, and how the mass in question hadn't been there before.
And then he'd said it. The word you'd been avoiding, the one that made everything crash down around you.
Cancer.
You'd felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. For a moment, you couldn't breathe, couldn't think.
The word echoed in your mind, bouncing around like it didn't belong there. You'd stared at the scan, your eyes unfocused, as Dr. Patel continued to explain the next steps—biopsies, treatments, consultations—but his voice had become background noise.
You hadn't cried, not then. You'd just nodded numbly, your hands gripping the arms of the chair so tightly you thought they might snap. Your chest had tightened, the ache you'd been ignoring now unbearable, but you'd forced yourself to stay still.
When the appointment ended, you'd walked out of the clinic in a daze. The world outside had felt too bright, too normal, like nothing had changed when everything had.
You'd sat in your car for what felt like hours, staring at the steering wheel as the weight of it all pressed down on you. And for the first time, you'd thought about what this meant—not just for you, but for Jenna.
How would you even begin to tell her? How could you?
She was the person you turned to when things felt too heavy, the one who always knew how to make everything seem a little less impossible. But this time... this time felt different.
You'd closed your eyes, leaning your head back against the seat, trying to imagine how the conversation would go. You could see her face so clearly in your mind, the way her brows would furrow, her lips parting as she searched for the right words.
You could almost hear her voice, the way it would waver as she asked, "What does this mean? What do we do?"
And that's where your mind stalled—because you didn't have the answers.
You didn't know what it meant, not really, and you definitely didn't know what to do. The idea of seeing that kind of fear in her eyes, of being the reason her world tilted off its axis, made your stomach twist.
Then there was her work. Jenna had always been busy, but lately, it felt like the world was pulling her in a million directions at once.
She'd been running from set to set, juggling interviews, photo shoots, and endless calls with her team. You'd seen how tired she was, how she tried to hide it behind a bright smile whenever she came home, but you could see the strain in her eyes.
How could you add this to her plate?
The thought hit you like a punch to the gut, the realization settling in with a kind of brutal clarity. If you told her, it wouldn't just be your burden anymore—it would become hers, too. And that wasn't fair. Not when she already had so much to carry.
You'd opened your eyes, staring at the dashboard, trying to convince yourself that waiting wasn't the same as hiding. It wasn't like you were lying to her, not really.
You just needed time to figure things out, to understand what this meant and what came next. Maybe once you had more information, once you knew what the treatment would look like or what the prognosis was, it would be easier to tell her.
Or maybe that was just an excuse.
The truth, the part you didn't want to admit even to yourself, was that you were scared. Not just of the diagnosis, but of what it would do to her.
Jenna was strong—stronger than anyone you'd ever met—but this felt like too much, even for her. You couldn't bear the thought of seeing her break under the weight of it, of watching her world shift because of something you couldn't control.
And then there was the selfish part of you, the part that didn't want to see the pity in her eyes. You didn't want her to look at you differently, to start treating you like you were fragile or broken. You didn't want this to define you, not yet, not in her eyes.
So you'd made the decision, sitting there in the stifling silence of your car. You wouldn't tell her—not now, at least. You'd keep this to yourself, at least until you knew more, until you could figure out how to explain it without falling apart.
It wasn't an easy decision. In fact, it felt like the hardest thing you'd ever done. But as you sat there, the weight of it all pressing down on your chest, it felt like the only choice you had.
You thought that, for now, you'd carry this alone.
But after a while, things felt different.
The days had turned into weeks, and with each passing one, the weight of the secret grew heavier. It wasn't just the diagnosis itself; it was the way it bled into every part of your life, a shadow you couldn't shake.
And Jenna—she'd started noticing.
It was small things at first, things that were easy to dismiss or laugh off.
You'd caught her watching you more closely when you coughed, her brow creasing ever so slightly. "Maybe you should get that checked out," she'd said once, the words half-teasing but laced with genuine concern. You'd waved her off with a smile, promising it was nothing, but the look in her eyes had lingered.
Then there were the nights when you'd felt too drained to do much of anything. Jenna had curled up beside you on the couch, her hand brushing against yours as she asked, "Are you feeling okay? You've seemed... tired lately."
You'd blamed it on work, on stress, on anything but the truth, and she'd let it go—though not without a small frown tugging at her lips.
The tipping point had come a few nights ago, when you'd caught her staring at you in the mirror.
You'd been brushing your teeth, the rhythmic sound filling the quiet bathroom, when you noticed her reflection watching yours. "You've lost weight," she'd said softly, her voice more curious than accusatory.
"I haven't noticed," you'd lied, avoiding her gaze.
She'd hesitated, her arms crossing over her chest as she leaned against the doorframe. "Maybe we should book a check-up or something," she'd suggested, her tone light but her eyes serious.
You'd shrugged it off again, changing the subject, but the way her gaze lingered on you made it clear she wasn't convinced.
And that's what finally pushed you to make the decision. You couldn't keep brushing her off, couldn't keep pretending everything was fine when it clearly wasn't.
She was already worried, even if she didn't fully realize it yet. And sooner or later, she was going to piece things together on her own.
So when she told you she finally had a night free—no calls, no meetings, no obligations—you decided it was time.
The two of you had been planning this date for weeks, trying to carve out time amidst the chaos of her schedule. It wasn't anything extravagant, just dinner at your favorite little spot downtown, but it felt significant in a way you couldn't quite explain.
You told yourself it was the right moment, that you couldn't keep putting this off. You didn't know where this illness would take you next or how much time you had before the symptoms became impossible to hide. The coughs were more frequent now, the fatigue harder to mask. It was only a matter of time before Jenna noticed something you couldn't explain away.
This wasn't how you'd wanted to tell her—not like this, over a quiet dinner on what should've been a happy night. But you didn't see another choice. You couldn't keep lying to her, and you couldn't bear the thought of her finding out some other way.
As you got ready for the evening, the weight of the decision settled over you, heavy but resolute. You weren't sure how you were going to say it or what words you'd use, but you knew it had to be now.
Tonight, you'd tell her.
You'd been rehearsing the words in your head all day, trying to prepare yourself for what felt impossible to say.
But now, sitting in the car, you couldn't ignore the way the air seemed heavier, weighed down by something you couldn't name, and Jenna—Jenna wasn't herself.
She'd been trying to act normal, you could tell. Humming along to the radio, her fingers drumming against the steering wheel like she always did, glancing over at you every so often with what you guessed was meant to be a reassuring smile.
But there was a tension in her movements, a stiffness that wasn't usually there.
It was subtle, barely noticeable if you weren't paying attention. But you were paying attention.
Her hands gripped the wheel a little tighter than usual, her knuckles pale against the leather.
Her gaze lingered too long on the road ahead, as if she was focusing on anything but you. The way she adjusted the air conditioning, even though it didn't need it, or fiddled with her bracelet, slipping it up and down her wrist—these weren't things Jenna usually did.
Your chest felt tight, and not from the illness.
Had she figured it out? Had she found something—a paper you'd forgotten to throw away, maybe, or a note scrawled hastily with an appointment reminder? You'd been so careful, but the thought that you'd slipped up sent a sharp pang of anxiety through you.
You replayed everything in your head, scanning for mistakes, for signs. She hadn't said anything outright, but that only made it worse. If she had found something, she wouldn't confront you about it—not Jenna. No, she'd let it fester, trying to give you space, trying not to pry. But that didn't mean she wouldn't act differently.
And she was acting differently.
Even the silence between you felt louder than it should have, thick and charged with something unspoken. You'd always been able to sit comfortably with her in quiet moments, sharing space without the need to fill it. But this wasn't that. This was an entirely different kind of silence, one that pressed down on you like a weight you couldn't shrug off.
Your mind raced, chasing every possible scenario. Maybe she'd pieced it together herself, noticed more than you thought. Jenna wasn't oblivious.
She'd seen you brush off dinner more often than not, heard the cough that hadn't gone away, seen how you'd flinched the other day when she wrapped her arms around your ribs from behind. She'd even asked, once or twice, if everything was okay.
"You're sure you're fine?" she'd said a few nights ago, her brows knitting together in concern as you forced down a glass of water to stop the coughing fit. You'd laughed, waved her off, told her you'd been pushing yourself too hard at work.
And maybe she'd believed you. Or maybe she hadn't.
The thought gnawed at you as you stared out the window, the glow of passing streetlights streaking across your vision.
You turned to look at her, and for a moment, she felt impossibly far away. She was still Jenna, your Jenna, but there was a distance now, something fragile and strange sitting between you. Her profile was calm, unreadable, her lips pressed into a line that wasn't quite a frown but wasn't a smile, either.
You tried to convince yourself that you were imagining things, that your own guilt and nerves were making you see something that wasn't there. But deep down, you couldn't shake the feeling.
When she finally pulled into the restaurant parking lot and shifted the car into park, she sat there for a moment, her hands still on the wheel.
"You okay?" she asked, her voice steady but quieter than usual.
"Yeah," you answered quickly, too quickly. "You?"
"Of course," she said, the words slipping out a fraction too fast.
Her smile came next, bright but brittle, like it might crack if you looked at it too closely. And as she turned away, unbuckling her seatbelt and reaching for her purse, you caught a glimpse of something in her eyes—hesitation, maybe, or something close to it.
You didn't know what it meant, but it lingered, heavy in your chest, as the two of you made your way inside.
The restaurant was warm and softly lit, the kind of place where the low hum of conversation mixed with the faint clink of silverware on plates. You'd picked it because it was one of your usual spots—familiar, comfortable, with memories stitched into every corner. But tonight, none of that comfort seemed to settle in.
You couldn't stop picturing how the night might unfold, how Jenna might react once you finally told her. Would she cry? Would she be mad—at you, at the world, at herself for not noticing sooner? Would she try to fix it, as if sheer determination could somehow erase what was already happening?
The thought of her being mad was the one that stuck, looping endlessly in your mind. Would she think you'd waited too long to tell her?
Or worse, would she be upset that you'd told her at all, that you'd burdened her with something so heavy when her life was already so full?
You could see it so clearly—her soft features hardening, her voice laced with frustration as she asked why you hadn't come to her sooner. Why you hadn't trusted her enough.
You swallowed hard, trying to keep your nerves from spiraling further out of control. But it didn't help that Jenna was acting off. You'd been together for two and a half years—long enough to notice when something wasn't right. And tonight, something definitely wasn't right.
She was trying, you'd give her that. She smiled when the waiter brought the menus, chatted with him about the specials like she always did, and even reached across the table to brush her fingers lightly over yours. But her smile didn't quite reach her eyes, and her touches felt more like a distraction than a comfort.
When the waiter came back to take your drink orders, she didn't hesitate. "A glass of the house red," she said, her voice steady, almost automatic.
You were about to do the same—it was your thing, after all. A little tradition you'd fallen into on dates like this. But the doctor's voice echoed in your mind: Avoid alcohol, caffeine, anything that might add strain. So instead, you said, "I'll just have a Diet Coke, please."
Jenna's head snapped up, her brows knitting together as she looked at you. "No wine?" she asked, her tone light but curious. "Since when do you skip wine?"
You scrambled for an excuse, heat rushing to your face as you waved it off. "Just... not feeling it tonight. Wanted something lighter."
Her eyes lingered on you for a moment, like she didn't quite believe you but wasn't going to press the issue. "Alright," she said, leaning back in her chair. But there was a flicker of something in her expression—confusion, maybe, or concern. You couldn't tell.
As she turned her attention back to the menu, you tried to steady your breathing, but your chest felt tight. You knew she noticed things, little things, even when you thought you'd been careful. And now you couldn't help but wonder if she was piecing them together in real time, one by one, until the truth clicked into place.
You looked down at your hands, twisting the napkin in your lap as the nerves swirled in your stomach.
You weren't sure how much longer you could keep this up—pretending everything was fine, acting like tonight was just another date. Because it wasn't. And you weren't sure how to tell her that without everything breaking apart.
And still, you couldn't shake the feeling that she already knew.
But you tried to keep the conversation going, forcing yourself to focus on Jenna and not on the crushing weight of your own nerves.
She talked about work, the projects she was excited for, the roles she'd recently turned down. You asked questions, nodded at all the right times, even laughed softly when she mentioned something funny one of her co-stars had done. But the way she was looking at you—it made it impossible to relax.
Her gaze was soft, too soft, like she was trying to protect you with just her eyes.
There was a sympathy there, gentle and unspoken, that only made your stomach churn harder. Did she already know? Had she pieced it all together? The thought gnawed at you, turning every word you said into an effort just to keep up the act.
By the time the food arrived, you were too nervous to eat. The plate in front of you looked like it belonged to someone else—steaming, perfectly plated, entirely untouched.
You picked at it, moving the food around your plate, but your appetite had vanished. Every nerve in your body was screaming, the weight of what you were about to say threatening to crush you.
You didn't understand why. You loved Jenna. You loved her more than you could ever put into words.
She was the reason you smiled when you didn't feel like it, the reason your laughter didn't sound hollow. She was the first person you thought about when you woke up and the last one before you fell asleep. She was your person.
And that's why you had to tell her.
You told yourself that over and over again. This wasn't just about you. Jenna deserved to know. If there was anyone you wanted to be the first to hear, it was her.
Not a friend, not a family member—Jenna. Because no matter how terrifying this was, no matter how much it hurt, she was the one who deserved to know the truth.
You tried to convince yourself that it didn't matter how she'd react, that you'd find a way to deal with whatever came next. Whether she stayed, whether she left, whether she cursed you out for not telling her sooner—it didn't matter.
This illness was a part of you now. There was no escaping it, no undoing it, no pretending it wasn't there. And if Jenna didn't want to stay, you'd have to accept that, too. But you couldn't let her find out some other way. You had to be the one to tell her, no matter how hard it was.
A little while into the dinner, you glanced up from your untouched plate, the words balanced precariously on the tip of your tongue. You were going to tell her. Right now.
But then you noticed Jenna again. She was fiddling with the edge of her napkin, her fingers smoothing and crumpling it over and over.
She hadn't touched her wine glass in minutes, though she'd ordered it with enthusiasm. And when she wasn't fidgeting with the napkin, she was twisting her bracelet up and down her wrist or tapping her nails lightly against the table.
Her nervousness was palpable, radiating off her in waves. And it made you pause.
She looked like she already knew. Like she was bracing herself for something—maybe for you to say it out loud. The realization only made your own nerves spike higher, your throat tightening as you tried to steady yourself.
What if she was waiting for this moment? What if she'd guessed and had been dreading it ever since? It was impossible to tell, but the thought made the words stick in your throat, suddenly too heavy to push out.
You took a shaky breath, gripping the edge of the table to ground yourself, but the question remained, lingering in your mind like a storm cloud: Did she already know.
The silence between you was thick and unyielding, like a barrier you couldn't push through. You stared at your untouched plate, willing yourself to speak, to just get it over with. Your heart hammered in your chest, each beat echoing in your ears, and you felt like you were teetering on the edge of something vast and terrifying.
Just say it, you told yourself. You've rehearsed this a hundred times. Just say it.
But the words didn't come.
Your throat felt dry, the air between you charged with everything unsaid. And then, in that fragile quiet, you finally opened your mouth, the beginnings of your confession trembling on your lips.
"I—"
You barely got the first sound out before Jenna interrupted you.
"I need to talk to you about something."
Her voice cut through the moment like a sharp blade, and your eyes snapped up to meet hers. She froze, realizing she'd interrupted, her brow furrowing in apology.
"Sorry," she said quickly, her hands lifting slightly as if to physically backpedal. "You go first."
The tension in her expression, the nervous energy radiating off her, should've made you more anxious. But instead, you felt a wave of relief so profound it nearly knocked the breath out of you.
You didn't want to say it.
You didn't want to tell her, to put it into words, to make it real. Because once you said it out loud, there'd be no going back.
The illness that had already seeped into every corner of your life, consuming your thoughts and your body, would become something undeniable. And it wasn't just your burden anymore—it would become hers, too.
So you nodded quickly, your voice barely above a whisper. "No, it's okay. You go."
Jenna hesitated, her eyes scanning yours as if to make sure you meant it. Then, with a small, almost imperceptible sigh, she shifted in her seat, her fingers tangling together in her lap.
You watched her, noticing for the first time how truly nervous she looked. Her hands moved constantly, fidgeting with the hem of her sleeve, twisting her bracelet, pressing her palms flat against her thighs.
For a fleeting moment, your mind latched onto something completely irrational: Was she going to propose?
The thought felt absurd, but it burrowed into your brain anyway. The way she was avoiding eye contact, the way her fingers clasped and unclasped like she was gripping something small—it all seemed so... deliberate. Like she was holding onto something important.
You could almost picture it: a velvet box, hidden in her jacket pocket, the hinge creaking as she opened it to reveal something glittering and perfect. Her nervousness would make sense then. Proposing was a big deal, a life-changing moment, and Jenna would want to get it exactly right.
It had to be that. Maybe it was wishful thinking, your mind scrambling for anything to distract you from your own nerves, but for a second, you almost let yourself believe it.
Then Jenna spoke, and it all came crashing down.
She didn't look at you right away. Her gaze dropped to her lap, where her hands were still fidgeting, and she swallowed hard before starting. "I've been thinking about this for a while," she said softly, her voice barely audible over the hum of the restaurant.
Your stomach dropped.
Her words were slow, halting, like she was trying to choose them carefully but wasn't quite sure how. She glanced up at you briefly, her eyes heavy with something you couldn't place—sympathy, maybe, or regret—before looking down again.
"It's just..." She paused, exhaling shakily. "With everything going on—with my career, and the projects, and traveling all the time... it's a lot. And I know it's not fair to you."
You didn't respond. You couldn't.
"I'm barely home," she continued, her voice trembling slightly. "And when I am, I'm... distracted. By work, by everything I have to do. I feel like I'm constantly being pulled in a million different directions, and no matter how hard I try, I can't... I can't give you the time or attention you deserve."
Her hands tightened in her lap, her knuckles pale against her skin. She looked up at you again, forcing herself to meet your gaze even though it clearly took effort.
"You've been so patient with me," she said, her voice thick with emotion. "So understanding, even when I didn't deserve it. And I hate that. I hate that I've let things get to this point, where I feel like I'm failing you."
She gulped, her Adam's apple bobbing as she struggled to steady herself. "I've been thinking about this for a long time," she repeated, almost as if she was trying to convince herself now.
The words hung heavy between you, suffocating in their weight.
"I just... I think it's for the best if we—if we break up."
The final words came out like a whisper, but they might as well have been a shout. They echoed in your head, over and over, until they drowned out everything else.
She was still looking at you, her expression raw and vulnerable, waiting for you to say something—anything. But you couldn't.
Because in that moment, it felt like the ground had opened up beneath you, pulling you into a freefall you couldn't escape.
For a moment, you couldn't even process what she'd said. It didn't feel real, couldn't feel real. The restaurant around you blurred into nothing—voices faded into static, the clinking of plates and glasses became a distant hum. All you could hear was the sound of her words echoing in your mind.
Break up.
You blinked, and suddenly your throat was tight, your chest heavy, and your vision stung with tears threatening to spill over. You tried to swallow, but it felt like there was a lump lodged in your throat, growing bigger with every second of silence that passed.
All you could manage was a quiet, broken, "Oh."
It was barely a sound, barely anything at all, but it carried everything. All the confusion, the hurt, the disbelief—it was packed into that one syllable that trembled out of you. And the moment it escaped, you felt like you were collapsing from the inside out.
Your hands trembled slightly as they rested on your lap, and you clenched them into fists to steady yourself.
But it didn't work. Your chest felt like it was caving in, your stomach churning violently as if you were going to be sick. You suddenly felt more ill than you'd ever felt before, like every bit of strength you had left was being drained out of you all at once.
You blinked again, and a tear slid down your cheek before you even realized you were crying.
Jenna didn't look away.
Her gaze stayed locked on you, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears, and that only made it worse. It made your chest tighten further, your throat burn hotter. Because why was she crying? Why was she crying?
If she thought this was the right thing to do, if she believed that breaking up was the solution, then why did she look like she was on the verge of breaking, too?
The thought stirred something sharp and bitter in your chest—something close to anger.
You didn't want to be angry, not at her. You loved her more than anything, more than yourself, more than anything you'd ever known in this world. But in that moment, it bubbled up anyway, unbidden and ugly.
How could she say this was for the best and look like she was about to cry? How could she sit there, tearing you apart with her words, and act like she felt guilty about it? Like she didn’t want to do this but was doing it anyway.
If she didn't want to do it, then why was she?
Your hands unclenched, trembling as you wiped hastily at your face, trying to erase the tears that kept coming. But it was no use. They kept falling, hot and relentless, leaving tracks down your cheeks that you couldn't hide, even if you tried.
"Okay," you whispered, though it wasn't okay. Nothing was okay. But you didn't have anything else to say. Your mind felt blank, empty except for the deafening echo of her words and the ache that spread through your chest like wildfire.
Your lips parted like you were about to say more, but nothing came out. There was so much you wanted to ask, to scream, to cry, but the weight of it all held you frozen. You could only sit there, staring at her through the blur of your tears, wondering how it had come to this.
Why now? Why like this? Why, after everything you'd been through together, was this the moment it all fell apart?
Your heart felt like it was breaking, splintering into a million pieces you didn't know how to put back together.
You stared at her, searching her face for something—anything—that might explain this, that might soften the blow. But all you saw was sadness and guilt and resolve. And that, more than anything, made you feel like you might throw up.
You didn't know how to respond—what could you say? Everything felt so wrong, so heavy, and all you could do was sit there, your throat too tight to speak, your heart too shattered to form words.
And Jenna, maybe out of nervousness or guilt—or both—began to ramble again. Her voice was softer now, tinged with a slight tremor, like she was trying to steady herself but couldn't quite manage it.
"I—I've just been thinking about this a lot," she said, her words spilling out in a way that didn't quite connect. "With... everything. My work, how busy it's been, and I don't know. I've been trying to figure it out, and it's like—like maybe it's just too much."
Her fingers fidgeted in her lap, twisting her rings and pressing into her palm as if she could ground herself that way.
Her gaze flicked up to you, then away, then back again. She looked like she was searching for something—understanding, forgiveness, anything—but couldn't seem to hold your eyes for more than a second at a time.
"It's not that I don't care," she added quickly, almost desperately, her words tripping over themselves. "You know I do. You know I care about you so much, and that's why—" She stopped mid-sentence, pressing her lips together hard, her brows furrowing like she didn't know how to finish the thought.
Her voice was uneven when she started again. "I just—everything's so complicated right now. With filming, with traveling, and—and I feel like..." Her words faltered again, and she let out a shaky breath, her shoulders sagging as if the weight of her own thoughts was too much.
Her sentences were fragmented, scattered, like she didn't fully know how to explain herself. It wasn't an argument, wasn't a definitive declaration—it was just... messy.
And that made it worse.
Because nothing she was saying felt concrete, nothing felt like a real reason. It was all just vague, unfinished thoughts that left you sitting there, trying to piece together what she actually meant. Trying to figure out if she even knew what she was saying.
Jenna swallowed hard, her throat bobbing as she glanced down at her lap again. "I don't know how else to say it," she murmured, almost to herself, her voice barely audible.
But that didn't make it any clearer.
All you could do was sit there, still frozen, still unable to speak, as she rambled on, her words tangling together in a way that felt more like she was trying to convince herself than explain anything to you.
And it felt like every word she said was chipping away at something inside you, leaving you raw and exposed and aching.
You couldn't even process the idea of why she was doing this, because she wasn't giving you a reason—she was just... saying things. Vague, messy things that didn't feel like they added up to anything but heartbreak.
"What were you going to say?" She asked, clearly getting the point of her rambling not helping anybody at the table. You felt your stomach twist violently. Her tone was soft, hesitant, like she was trying to patch the cracks she'd just shattered into existence, but it only made everything worse.
You stared at her, your heart thudding heavily in your chest. Was she serious? Did she really think she could just ask that now—after everything—and act like it hadn't happened? Like you weren't sitting here, choking on the weight of her words, trying to make sense of it all?
You couldn't believe it. And yet, part of you could. This was so her—to try and smooth it all over, to shove the pieces of normalcy back into place even when it was painfully obvious they didn't fit anymore. But you could see it in her face, in the way her lips trembled and her eyes flicked nervously over your expression. She knew it wasn't working. She knew this was ridiculous.
Still, you couldn't answer right away. Because, what could you even say?
What you were going to say—what you needed to say—wasn't something you could tell her now. Not after this. Not after she'd sat across from you and torn everything apart, leaving you to sit here, raw and exposed, trying to make sense of her fragmented reasoning.
You couldn't tell her. You couldn't tell her that you were sick. Because now it would look like a desperate attempt to make her stay, to guilt her into taking it all back. And that was the last thing you wanted.
No—more than that, it would make it real. Actually real. Saying the words out loud, to her of all people, in this moment, would make it something you couldn't take back. And you weren't ready for that. You weren't ready for any of it.
"It was nothing," you muttered, your voice flat and quiet, barely recognizable as your own. You stared at the table, refusing to meet her eyes, because the weight of her gaze was too much to bear. "Just... nothing important."
You hoped she'd leave it at that, though you could tell from the way her expression softened into something unbearably sympathetic that she didn't believe you. She was probably going to ask again, probably going to try to dig deeper, but you couldn't give her more. Not now. Not like this.
She didn't press you for more, but the silence that followed felt louder than anything she could have said. You didn't look at her, didn't dare, because you knew what you'd see—concern, confusion, maybe even guilt—and you couldn't take it. Not after everything.
You tried to focus on the table in front of you, the half-empty glass of soda that had gone warm, the plate of untouched food that suddenly felt miles away. But your mind wouldn't stop racing.
This wasn't how you'd imagined it. None of it.
All the words you'd rehearsed, the courage you'd spent all day building, the carefully planned moment—it was gone now, swept away like it had never existed. And no matter how much you wanted to, no matter how desperately you wished you could take it all back, it was too late.
Too late to say what you'd come here to say. Too late to stop what she'd said instead. Too late to fix whatever had been shattered between you tonight.
And now, you'd have to face it all alone.
The waiting rooms. The cold sterility of hospital walls. The appointments that stretched on longer than the days themselves. You'd prepared yourself for those things, or at least tried to, but you'd never prepared for doing it without her.
You couldn't blame her. You wouldn't. But that didn't make it hurt any less.
You swallowed hard, willing the tears to stay put, and reached for your glass, if only to give your hands something to do. The carbonation fizzed on your tongue, sharp and bitter, but you barely tasted it.
And as Jenna's gaze lingered on you, hesitant and uncertain, you told yourself the same thing you'd been trying to believe all night.
You would be fine. You had to be.
Because now, it was too late to say otherwise.
739 notes · View notes
trashmoutth · 2 months ago
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You wanna keep arguing now?
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Dean Winchester oneshot Summary: Reader and Charlie go on a hunt by themselves and it goes wrong. Now you're stuck in a motel with a pissed of Dean Winchester. Pairing: Dean x f!reader, implied Sam x f!reader (platonic) Warrning(s): NSFW, minors dni!, smut, angst, mentions of death, arguing, english is not my first language and I didn't write for awhile but my spn obsession is back and I felt the need.
„What the hell were you thinking?!“
He was furious with you, you knew that. But after two weeks of being cooped up in the bunker you were starting to go crazy. So, when Charlie called to ask for your help on a vampire case you did not think twice about it. You weren’t exactly a full-fledged hunter per se, but you’ve had some experience in the past couple of years. You’ve helped the boys fight demons, angels, even leviathans, so you believed you could handle yourself against some punk-ass vamps. Not to mention, Charlie was a friend, and you were bored out of your mind.
You left a note for Sam, took one of the cars from the bunker (well, borrowed) and drove off to meet with Charlie. What you did not expect was the case going downhill as quickly as it did. The vamps captured you, fed on you and were trying to decide weather to turn you or kill you, when he came barging in. He took the entire nest out in less than five minutes and set you free. Charlie broke her leg so he dropped her off in a hospital and was currently driving you back to the bunker.
You were grateful to him for saving you, of course, but you knew that he was fuming. He was driving for an hour without saying a word to you and you could sense the anger coming off of him. He didn’t even turn the music on so you sat there uncomfortably in complete silence, only accompanied by the sound of the car engine.
“Dean…”, you tried to begin a sentence, but he quickly cut you off.
“Shut the hell up! I don’t wanna hear it!”
You took a deep breath. You tried to keep your cool because you knew you were in the wrong here, but the way he spoke to you started to make you angry.
“Dean, I know I shouldn’t have left, but you and Sam were working your own case and Charlie needed help…”
“If Charlie needs help, she can always call me! Or Sam! Or Cas! What the hell were you thinking?! Just leaving the bunker like that?! No note, no anything…”
“I left a note!” you protested.
“Well, I didn’t get it!”
“I left it on Sam’s table…”
“Oh, I see! That’s nice! So now you and Sam are keeping stuff from me? That’s great…”
You rolled your eyes. He was so dramatic.
“It’s not like that…”
“No, no, no, you know what? That’s fine! You and Sammy have something going on, I don’t give a crap, but the next time your ass needs saving don’t call me!”
“Well, I’m not the one who called you, Charlie did”, you said calmly.
 He shot you a dirty look and stepped on the gas pedal.
“Jesus Christ, man, slow down!”, you gasped.
“Oh, so you can walk into a vampire’s nest all by yourself, but my driving is too much for you?”
He did slow down though. You spent the next thirty minutes driving in silence and then he pulled over in front of a motel.
“Come on”, he said and opened your car door for you.
“We’re stopping here?”
“It’s a five-hour drive to the bunker and you’re still bleeding”.
“I’m not bleeding…”
“Just get out of the car!”
You let out an annoyed sigh, but you listened to him. Truthfully, you were feeling a little dizzy. He booked a room for the two of you and practically carried you inside. He placed you on the bed, took out the first-aid kit from his car and started patching you up in silence.
You could tell by the look on his face that he was still angry, but his hands were gentle and careful. You were trying to think of something to say, something that would make things better, but nothing came to mind. You just observed him. His jaw was clenched and his eyes gloomy, but there was something else in them. Like a trace of… fear? Maybe.
You weren’t unaccustomed to Dean being mad at you and it was so easy to forget why he was that way. He cared. He cared more than anyone you’ve ever met. As much as you bickered, you knew he loved you in a way, and that he was simply scared to lose you.
“Dean…”, you tried again, “I’m sorry”.
He didn’t answer. He didn’t even look at you. He just clenched his jaw harder. You took that as a sign he might actually let you speak now, so you kept going.
“I know I shouldn’t have left like that, and I know I screwed up. I thought I could help, you know? Charlie needed backup and you and Sam were busy… I just thought I shouldn’t let her go on a hunt by herself. I’m sure you wouldn’t have wanted that either. I was just trying to do the right thing… Like you would’ve!”.
His eyes finally met yours. He wasn’t that angry anymore, but he was annoyed at your words.
“You are not me!”, he finally said.
Ouch.
What’s that supposed to mean?
“Well, maybe so, but any backup is better than no back up!”, you defended yourself, “And if it weren’t for me, Charlie would’ve gotten a lot worse than a broken leg!”
At your surprise, he chuckled. Now you were the one who was starting to get angry.
“Don’t laugh at me!”, you said firmly, “You are looking at me like I’m some kind of idiot! Or an amateur! I know I may not have been raised a hunter like you and Sam, but I’ve been through a lot worse than what happened today! I fought by your side against Lucifer and Lilith and Eve and Dick friggin’ Roman! I’ve saved your ass personally multiple times! I’ve been dead! I’ve been to hell! I’m not some stupid civilian, Dean! After everything that happened, I’m… I’m a hunter! Weather you like it or not! Weather I like it or not! I might not be your calibre of a hunter but…”
“Woah, woah, slow down, hunter!”, he raised his hands defensively, “That’s not what I meant!”
You blinked in a surprise.
“Then what exactly did you mean?”, you asked, still frustrated at his tone.
He let out a silent groan.
“Listen, I know you are good at the job. I know you are tough and can handle yourself. Even though today was a bust”, he added in accusatory tone.
You opened your mouth to say something, but he quickly interrupted you.
“But when I say you are not me…”, he shook his head, searching for the right words. He closed his eyes for a second, trying to collect himself and finally spoke again, in a calmer tone.
“Listen, I screw up too! Hell, I’ve screwed up more times than I can count! And you’re right, you’ve saved my ass a lot! So have Sam and dad and Bobby… but if something happens to me, then that’s on me! That’s my own friggin’ fault! But it’s my job to protect you! And if something happens to you… I just couldn’t live with that!”
You listened to him in silence, trying to figure out what exactly he was saying to you. A part of you understood. The guilt, the responsibility he was feeling. You wanted to help him. To help him with that weight he was carrying. To tell him everything is ok and that you understand. But all that came out of your mouth was:
“It’s not your job to protect me, Dean”.
He flinched. Something twinkled in his green eyes and his voice turned cold again.
“I get it, I’m sure you would much rather have Sammy watching over you but I’m afraid I’m all you can get right now!”.
You raised your eyebrows in a surprise.
“What?”, it was all you were able to say.
“Listen, I know you two have something going on and the last thing I want is to get in the way of that, sweetheart”.  
You shook your head, and a small smile appeared on your lips before you could stop it.
Is that what this was? This entire tantrum? Was Dean Winchester… jealous?
“I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about”, you said sincerely.
“Sure”, he replied.
“Dean… Sam and I… we’re friends, that’s all! I mean I love him, he’s like a brother to me. Like a big, nerdy, dorky brother I’ve always wanted! And I’d do anything for him, just like you would. But… I could never be with him!”, you made a grimace and laughed.
“Yeah, okay”, he said.
“Why don’t you believe me?”, you laughed out loud this time. You just couldn’t stop it. This entire conversation was so bizarre.
“Because I’m not blind. He’s the one you always turn to when you need something, he’s the one you always call, text, talk to… hell, you left him a note today, didn’t you?”.
“Well, yes…”
“Like I said, I get it! I’m not trying to be a dick!”, he said, “It’s fine by me if you have a thing for each other, I’m glad even… you both deserve to be happy! All I’m saying is, it would be nice to get a heads up when you’re about to do something stupid, especially if I’m the one who’s gonna end up having to save you!”.
“Dean Winchester, I promise you I’m not trying to screw your brother!”, you yelled out,
“The reason I left him a note and not you is because I knew you were going to act like this! You would tell me to turn my ass around and come back home and if I didn’t you would come to get me, just like you did! And THEN you would yell at me just like you did! I’m not picking favourites, it’s just that Sam is easier to deal with sometimes, that’s all!”
“Oh, so I’m difficult to deal with, is that it?”
“Hell yes, you are!”
“So why do you keep dealing with me?”
“Oh, you’re such a damn idiot!”, you stood up from the bed in exasperation.
It was a mistake. The blood rushed to your brain, and you swerved on your feet. He jumped up and grabbed your shoulders with jungle cat-like reflexes. The look on his face went from irritated to worried in a matter of a second. It made you want to chuckle, but you held it in.
Goddamn, did you love this man.
“I’m fine, I’m fine”, you said quickly.
His eyes and voice both softened as he tried to get you back on the bed,
“Maybe you should get some rest. We can keep arguing in the morning”.
You rolled your eyes at him.
“Why do you want to keep arguing with me?”
“Trust me, sweetheart, that’s the last thing I want to do with you”.
Your heart stopped for a second. Your eyes widened and you looked at him in shock.
“Excuse you?”
He let out another sigh and tried to sit you down once again.
“Nothing, just go to sleep”.
“No, no, no, I don’t think so”, you said, shaking your head and turning around to face him, “What was that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing, I’m just saying crap. Don’t pay attention to it”.
But you wouldn’t let go. It’s been months since you first started noticing the change in Dean’s behaviour towards you. When you first met, he annoyed you so much and as far as you could tell, the feeling was mutual. You really were closer with Sam for a long time and the only reason you tolerated Dean was because he was his brother. And because well, he did save your life a couple of times. But then you died and came back and Dean, well… changed. You thought it was because of the guilt he felt over your death. Metatron did kill you because of your involvement with the Winchesters.
But it wasn’t just the guilt. You two started going on hunts together, he trusted you, he talked to you and looked at you like he’s never done before. You started suspecting he might have developed feelings for you that were more than just friendship, but there wasn’t an opportunity to bring it up. And you wanted to bring it up. You wanted to bring it up so badly.
“No!”, you protested and looked directly into his eyes, “What did you mean? What do you want to do with me?”, you asked, almost teasingly, but with a genuine desire to receive an answer.
He noticed the change in your tone and his eyes twinkled. His hands were still gently resting on your shoulders, making sure you don’t swerve again. He raised one of them and slowly brought his fingers up to caress your cheek. His touch was soft and warm, but it made a shiver go down your spine as if you were touched by lightning. You raised up your hand and gently placed it on his in affirmation. A small smile escaped both of your lips’.
You were still glaring into his eyes, waiting for him. Finally, his hand cupped your cheek and he brought his face to yours, slowly pressing his lips against yours.
The kiss was deep and gentle and warm, and it left you feeling breathless. You pulled him closer to you, running your fingers through his hair. He responded in the same way, sliding his hands down your waist and grabbing your thighs to lift you off the ground. You locked your legs around him as he carried you over to the table that was placed in the middle of the room.
He placed you on the table as his hands began exploring every inch of your body, his lips never leaving yours. Before you could even form a coherent thought, his hands were all up in your hair, over your chest, your thighs… In the moment they reached between your legs you let out a soft moan and arched your back, leaving your neck so beautifully exposed to him. He took advantage of that and moved his lips down to your collarbone, gently kissing and sucking on it. You pulled him even closer and moaned again. His scent was everywhere. He was everywhere. And it wasn’t enough.
You started to unbutton your plaid shirt but his fingers were quicker than yours.
You smiled at his impatience.
“It’s okay, the buttons won’t run away”, you said.
“I wish they would”, he muttered, making you laugh joyfully.
He smiled and kissed you again, unbuttoning your shirt completely and taking it off you in one fell swoop.
You tried to unbutton his now, but he was already out of it before you could even try.
“God”, you teased him, “You’re so impatient!”
“You have no idea”, he groaned, lifting you up again and crashing you both onto the bed.
He was placing hungry kisses all over your chest and stomach. His fingers then reached down to unbutton your jeans and you shivered in excitement as he slowly pulled them off you.
“Open your legs for me, sweetheart”, he said in a low tone, his eyes looking up to you as they were glistening with excitement and desire.
You bit your lip as you felt another shiver go down your spine.
“Open them”, he repeated.
You did what he asked, slowly spreading your legs as you felt the wetness and the pulsating sensation coming from between.
He gently moved the fabric of your underwear to a side, exposing you to him. His hungry eyes met yours once again as he gave you a soft kiss right between your thighs. You arched your back slightly and grabbed him by the hair, pulling him closer as he kissed and licked and sucked.
“These are getting in the way”, he said quietly and finally took off your panties.
You couldn’t help yourself and another moan left your lips, much louder this time. This encouraged him to go faster as you were becoming a moaning mess underneath his tongue. The pressure started building and building and building… and then he suddenly pulled away.
You widened your eyes in shock, desperate to pull him back down, but he pulled you up instead.
“I’m not done with you yet”, he said quietly as his breath tickled your ear.
You groaned in frustration.
“Now who’s impatient?”, he asked with a teasing smile.
“God, you’re so mean!”, you said.
“We’ll see about that”, he said as he reached down between your legs again and started rubbing your clit. He then slowly pushed one finger inside of you, stretching you out and earning another moan from you.
“Oh, God”, you whispered.
“You like that?”, he asked and added another finger.
You moaned again in response.
“Am I still mean?”
“Yes, you are!”, you responded.
He pushed you back on the bed while placing himself on top of you. He unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans. You reached out and gently cupped the growing bulge in his boxers making him groan quietly. You gasped in excitement. He was so hard.
He noticed your reaction and smiled.
“You see how hard I am for you?”
You bit your lip and nodded. Then you slowly pulled down his boxers and took him into your hands.
You’ve imagined him like this countless times, but you were still pleasantly surprised to see how big he was. You gripped him firmly and began to stroke his shaft as he groaned again.
You licked the tip and then put the rest of his length into your mouth, gently sucking on it. He moaned and tangled his fingers in your hair, pulling you closer.
You sucked harder causing him to cuss and moan again. You loved the sound of it. Your fingers found their way between your legs, and you began touching yourself as you sucked him off.
He seemed to like that even more and by the sounds he was making you could tell he was close.
“You’re going to need to slow down, sweetheart”, he said in a hoarse voice, “Or I’m going to cum without even being inside you first”.
You sucked on him a couple more times but then you let go. He pulled you up to kiss you, but you just pushed him down to the bed and climbed on top of him. His eyes widened in excitement as you guided his length to your entrance and slowly began to ride him.
You loved seeing him like this, messy and desperate for your touch. He gripped your thighs and moaned your name, his eyes staring deep into yours, begging you to fuck him harder.
You gave him what he wished for and began moving your hips faster and faster as you both cussed and groaned.
“Yes, yes”, he was whispering between the moans, “That’s it, ride me baby, please!”.
You were so close, and by the looks of it, so was he. You gripped each other closer as the pressure was building once again. You pulled his face close to your chest as he was about to come and finally, reached the so very anticipated release.
You held each other like that for a couple of minutes, trying to catch your breaths and then you finally laid back in the bed.
He pulled you close to him as you buried your face into his neck, just breathing in his scent. You were laying like that in silence for a little while, not really knowing what to say. Not really needing to say anything. Until he finally started chuckling like a little kid.
“What?”, you raised your eyes to him. “Well, do you wanna keep arguing now?”, he asked with a grin. You laughed too. “Oh, definitely! Just let me get some water first”.
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mister-001 · 3 months ago
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POISON
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content: Yandere Platonic Batfamily x Neglected Reader
sinopse — you were neglected from a young age, you could no longer take all this neglect and the looks they gave you, as if you were an insect next to them, your option was to run away, and so you did, but on the way, you meet a certain clown, one who charts your path, you might think that's how it ends, but you're very wrong, you can't defy your family, and look who came to haunt you, I mean, look who came to take you home.
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Warning: mentions of violence, murder, mentions of torture, violence, mentions of drugs, Reader is a girl, manipulation, violence against minors, torture, Cigarette use, negligence, joker being the joker, Yandere behavior, defined gender, blood.
chapters: 02
A/N: Firstly, you can call me Shin or Lay, feel free, sorry for the defined gender, I feel more comfortable writing for the female gender, but don't worry, I will write for other genders too, I'm just trying to feel comfortable first, I ask you to be patient with me, I can't be very active, I have a life to prioritize, health first, English is not my first language, Portuguese is, I'm using the translator, so if there is an error you already know Who to blame, I'm writing because I like writing, so don't rush me, sorry if there are any grammar or spelling mistakes, drink water and take care of yourselves, Take care little lamb...
Enjoy it while you can...
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You can't run away forever little bird...
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eyes were glued to the tomb in front, the tombstone well cared for and clean, a sigh came out of the little girl's mouth, more tears filled her eyes, even though she had this stoic expression, it didn't stop her from crying, until the stronger ones cry...
A hand was placed on the little girl's shoulder and she looked at the person, the middle aged man looked at her with pity, she had lost her mother so early, poor girl, at such a young age, already lost someone, the man smiled softly and nodded towards the car
The girl always had the curiosity of meeting her father, of course, her mother always said that he was a rich playboy who wouldn't have time for her, but even so, as harsh as those words sounded, the little girl knew that this was a lesson, a fact, and it seems that her mother was right, as always...
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Bruce considers himself to be at least a somewhat decent person
I mean, he may not be what people call perfect, but he tries to be decent, behind that expression, there is someone who was much happier before...
Well, when a little girl arrived at Wayne Manor, he tried to do what he could to calm down first, yes, it's not the first time he's had a child, but this time is different, this little girl, is his, she contains the same blood, she is not adopted, she is really his daughter
He tried at first, but then why didn't he try later?
Because he let her slip out of his hands
He should have been there for her
He wanted to have been there for her, but the city needed him
But she also needs it, you know?...
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Once again being ignored in this mansion, the dark halls that haunt you, stopping when you saw your older brother, Dick, he looked at you and just walked past you as if you didn't exist, you felt another piece of your heart break, with a sigh you walked again
Once again heading to the dark halls of the mansion
You were playing with dolls in your room, and looked at the door when you heard footsteps, your brother, Jason, walked by irritably, once again, it was always like this
You just went back to playing alone, with yourself and your silence...
It's like they say, silence is a person's best friend...
Footsteps are heard as a little girl walks through the halls once again, heading to the kitchen while looking for Alfred, she clutched the Batman plush and stopped in a room, she was going to knock on the door, but someone had already opened the door.
The little girl looked at her brother, Tim, and tried to speak, but he simply closed the bedroom door, leaving her standing in front of the door while looking at the wooden door in front of her.
With a sigh she turned and went back to looking for Alfred.
The little girl was helping Alfred and lost the Batman plush, while looking, the girl saw two girls talking and laughing, they were her sisters, Barbara and Cassandra, she likes to call them Barb and Cass, but when she went to talk to them girls, they just walked past her, Cass was kind enough to pet her head, but still, they completely ignored her existence
Again...
You were next to Damien as you clung to his jacket in the morning, a boy decided that you were the best option to bully, but Damien didn't like it very much and now the boy was on the floor bleeding, his nose was definitely broken. , he was crying in pain while Damien was looking on with disgust and disdain
You..., well you were scared, you hate seeing people bleeding, it makes you sick, you just wanted your stuffed animal back...
Startled when Damien finally looked at you with that serious expression, you quickly released the sleeve of his jacket and looked into his eyes
_ "you are weak, you will never be a Wayne, that must be why your mother died, because you weren't strong enough to save her, you can't even protect yourself alone, who guarantees that you can protect someone, I'm the most new, and I still know more than you, for once, be useful and grow "
You froze, as if time was standing still, with your eyes wide in surprise, you looked at the ground and nodded slowly as you closed your eyes to keep the tears away, it hurt, it hurt a lot, it hurt more than the scars you have from that day, the day your mother died, the day you were sent to a dark place...
Damien just walked past you and stopped in the hallway, leaving you alone, with just your tears...
You were in your room crying, tears rolled down your cheeks, holding onto the only thing you had, your Batman plush, you wanted Batman to save you just like he saves Ghotam...
You were too distracted to notice that someone entered your room, footsteps came closer to you and you felt arms around you, with a start you looked at the person, only to see Alfred
Without saying anything you allowed yourself to cry more as you clung to him.
Alfred caressed your back gently as he sighed softly, he just wishes someone in this mansion could see how brilliant you are, how amazing you are, if only there was something he could do...
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LOOKING at the Tombstone, everything was silent, the silence was deafening
Yes, you ran away, and I'm not saying it in a metaphor, I'm saying you actually ran away from the mansion, well, I wouldn't consider running away, because I'm pretty sure walking out the front door and no one stops you isn't considered running away, but which is a consideration for those who have never had one...
Now here you were, in front of your late mother's tombstone, the only one who taught you and gave you affection when you needed her most, no one can replace your mother, no one at all, you would get blood on your own hands if necessary, for She, you destroy the world...
Walking through the dark streets of Gotham was you, as you held your Batman plush close, you couldn't stop feeling that feeling of someone following you, well you were right but the worst part is being right about wrong feelings...
That's why you looked back, and didn't see anyone, but when you looked ahead, your heart felt like it was going to leave you, trying to calm your breathing you dared to look at his face, the smile that doesn't fool anyone, the clothes, the hair...
You weren't mistaken
You wish you were mistaken
But this was really him...
With an amused smile in front of him was none other than someone with his own macabre thoughts...
_ "Well, well, if we don't have a little clown, alone... I don't need to introduce myself, you must know me, but I have education and I'm going to introduce myself anyway, I'm the... Joker...
Batman will like the little gift, well, if he can have his little friends, I can also have a little clown with me, don't you agree?, of course you agree, come on, little clown, let's introduce you to Gotham City..."
You looked at the man in front of you with fear, your brain was screaming at you to run, but your legs seemed glued to the ground, frozen, paralyzed...
panic settled in your body when you felt arms lifting you, you tried to fight, you tried to make him let go of you, but you shivered when you felt something come into contact with your skin, of course you knew how to put one and one together, you grew with your Mom, so you obviously know that he injected something into you, injected something into your neck...
You felt tired and stopped fighting, your eyelids slowly closed as you tried to keep them open, but it wasn't enough and you fell into a deep sleep, a dreamless sleep...
A broken heart will never be broken again if the pieces are already too small, but who said you can't step on the pieces...
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BRUCE felt something was wrong, a bad feeling, he double checked his kids and found every one of them, but the more he looked, the more he felt something was wrong, so he went to look at the cameras in the batcave, wrong move ...
Looking at the cameras, he finally figured out what was wrong, his daughter, his little daughter came out, she ran away, he felt panic rising inside him, and he heard a noise behind him, and when he looked he saw Jason looking at the recording of the video. security camera with a death glare, before Bruce nodded as Jason quickly turned and went to warn the others...
That's why now they were all in the Batcave, looking at the security cameras, Tim blamed himself for not being able to stop this, he made so many plans, because he can't make a plan in case this happened, now she was lost, in the darkness of Gotham City, a dark place...
But they will find you, no matter what it takes
They will burn down Gotham if necessary
It looks like it won't rain water from the sky, but rather blood...
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A/N: hello little lamb, I hope you liked it, it wasn't my idea, I was inspired by an account that had this great idea, sorry for any grammar or spelling errors, and sorry again for the defined gender, remember to take care of yourself, little one little lamb, bye bye, take care...
Signed: 𝙇𝙖𝙮...
Autor : @trashpanda0000 @dhanyasri @marsmabe @caged-birdies-blog @vanessa-boo
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etclouie · 3 months ago
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kinktober day twenty five - uniform sex
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𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 summary: two of your childhood friends owing you a favor helps out when they stop you for speeding (Shane Walsh and Rick Grimes x fem!reader)
𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 setting: pre apocalypse 
𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 warnings: smut, threesome, unprotected sex, p in v, creampie(it’s shane), handjob, oral (rick receiving), no lori or carl😶, reader is described as to be the same age as rick and shane/was in the same year of school as them, shane and rick are lowk dirty cops here (they bang reader to let her off), readers described to be wearing a dress, pretty sure that’s it
𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 word count: 1.9k
𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 a/n: no comments
prev day | next day kinktober masterlist | main masterlist
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you were on your way home from work, hitting all the quieter roads and failing to stay at the speed limit. 
on any other day, you wouldn’t have been stopped but today was different. everything that could’ve went wrong today did, just like now. 
you seen the sirens flash behind you, and pulled over with a sigh. rolling down your window and waiting for the cop to walk up to your car, but the look that crossed your face as you met his eyes had a sigh of relief leaving you. 
“Shane?”
you questioned, eyes flicking from his face and then down to the badge pinned to his chest. the gold pin reading ‘Walsh’, a last name you’d grown overly familiar with. 
“mhm you know how fast you were going?”
he asked, his elbow resting lightly on your wing mirror. his eyes flicking from you and the back towards his partner still in their patrol car, unaware of who the other man was; but the feeling in your stomach had your mind racing to your other old best friend— Rick Grimes. 
“was ten over the limit, max”
pleading your case, which made him chuckle. his head shaking from side to side as he moved to cross his arms in your open window, his face inches from yours. 
the minty scent from his gum filling your senses from your closeness, eyes flicking down to his lips before his voice was pulling your attention back to him. 
“still over the limit sweetheart”
a shiver going down your spine at the nickname, eyes finding his again and meeting the gleam in his eyes. 
a pool of warmth setting in your belly under his gaze, leaning closer to him and murmuring out softly. 
“remember that favor you owe me?”
another chuckle pushed past his lips, watching his head shake as he stood upright again, motioning towards his patrol car towards Rick. 
the older of the two moving over to your car, a telling smirk across Shane’s face as he nodded his head towards you. Ricks hands resting on his hips as his eyes met yours, for the first time in years. 
“hm you remember that favor we owe her Rick?”
the favor that you’d brought up was dismal, something from your last year of high school. you’d done both boys a big favor, helping them get out of school for the day while they done something you don’t quite remember. but they both said they owed you one, and now felt as if the perfect opportunity to use up that favor. 
“from high school?”
Shane nodded in response, smirk broad across his face as his eyes skimmed down your body. his right hand reaching for the door handle and pulling open your door, arms crossing over the top of it as both men peered down at you. 
“and how exactly do you want us to repay that favor for you?”
the innuendo was there, all three of you felt it. gulping as you unbuckled your seatbelt before slowly climbing out of your car, heat shooting through your body. 
the road you were on was hardly used by people, so the chance of someone driving by and seeing the three of you was unlikely. 
“you know how Walsh, don’t be dim”
he huffed out a laugh at your words, eyes flicking over to meet Rick’s while he shut your car door. 
sandwiched between both men, your back to Shane’s chest while you faced Rick. 
“gonna let us have fun with you sweetheart?”
Shane’s persistent talking left Rick quiet, not that he minded. it allowed his eyes to rake down your body, stopping at the hem of your dress that Shane was now eagerly pushing up. 
“you’re stunning”
Rick drawled out, his hands lifting to grope at your boobs. his thumbs swiping over your hardening nipples through the fabric of your dress. 
letting out a breathy moan at his touch, back arching towards him while Shane grounded his hips against the swell of your ass. the bulge in his slacks prominent and throbbing in his boxers. 
“reckon she’s soaked for us Rick?”
the words barely registered in your head before one of Shane’s big hands were snaking into the front of your panties to swipe two thick fingers through your folds, pulling more moans from your chest. 
“oh fuck”
you and Shane breathed out simultaneously, yours needier than his. 
whining as his hand pulled away from your cunt to show Rick his now soaked fingers, that smirk still across his face. 
“shit sweetheart”
Rick’s voice dropped an octave, one of his hands keeping your left boob in his hold while the other cradled your jaw. pulling you into a deep, heated kiss— all teeth and tongue while your hips pushed back onto Shane. 
the pool of heat in your belly deepened, warmth settling through your body while both men lavished you with their undivided attention. 
Shane fumbled with his belt, the clank of it sounding as he got it open. breaking the kiss with Rick to glance back at him, his fingers tugging down his zipper while he spat his gum out to the side. 
“ain’t gonna keep you waiting much longer, promise you tha’”
he told before leaning in to kiss you as best he could, hands leaving his slacks to pull your panties down to your knees. the fabric drenched in your arousal. 
“can’t leave Rick without any pleasure darlin’, ain’t fair tha’”
he broke the kiss to mumble against your lips, pulling back enough to meet his gaze. nodding slowly, the words formulating in your head in little coherency. 
turning back to Rick, missing the way he worked open his belt and pushed his slacks down to his mid thigh. practically ogling at the sight of his cock, hot and hard and standing to attention. 
the look on your face must’ve shown your surprise, stood still in place— mind reeling and trying to make sense of what your current situation actually was. 
Rick must’ve sensed your hesitation, big hands cradling your face while pulling you into a softer kiss than before. 
“you sure you wanna do this?”
his soft questioning made your heart warm, almost swooning at his care. 
“want this— want both of you”
those words were all Shane needed to push himself into your warmth in one smooth thrust, his chest flush against your back as he buried himself to the hilt. his lips brushing against your ear as he murmured out lowly to you. 
“c’mon sweetheart, take care Ricky”
your left hand grabbed at Ricks shoulder, helping him move closer before he was kissing you again. tongue licking its way into your mouth and tangling with yours, while your right hand took hold of his cock. 
the tip of him leaking beads of precum, his hips rocking into your touch while Shane slowly started moving his hips against yours. 
“there we go”
his voice came out hoarse against your ear, hearing the smirk across his lips and breaking the kiss with Rick to glare back at Shane. 
“easy darlin’, we’re paying back that favor we owe you”
you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at him, his hold on your hips growing tighter as he continued to roll his hips into you. 
each drag of his cock against your walls making you moan lewdly, hand squeezing around Ricks cock and pulling a shaky groan from him. 
your hand moving slow and almost teasingly along Ricks length, twisting your wrist on the upstroke to pull more and more groans from his chest. his hips rocked into your touch and the head of his cock continued to leak, his precum helping to lubricate your strokes. 
“like that darlin’ fuck, yeah just like tha’”
the lilt in his voice grew thicker, hips chasing your hand while Shane continued to thrust into you. his left hand shaking around to your front and pressing two thigh fingers to your clit, drawing tight firm circles against you and drawing whinier moans from your lips. 
the whole scene was lewd, but you felt as if you were in paradise. 
old feelings for both of them resurfacing and feeling as if you were playing out your fantasies. 
“Rick-“
words failed you, but the way your eyes flicked between his and his lips gave away what you wanted. another kiss. 
he was leaning in to press his lips to yours again, your hand continuing along his cock while Shane continued to play with your clit. 
your walls fluttering and squeezing around him had a groan falling from his lips, his forehead dipping to rest on your shoulder before he was mumbling out. 
“shit sweetheart, squeezing me real tight”
the pool of warmth in the pit of your stomach was at its boiling point, ready to tip you over the edge. 
and with the way both men’s hips were canting desperately into your touch, you knew they were close too. 
continuing to pump Ricks cock, his breath hitching while his cock throbbed in your hand. teetering on the edge, but they both wanted you to cum first. 
“close, fuck ‘m close”
your admission had Shane’s hips moving quicker against yours, the sound of skin slapping against skin pulling your focus back to the man behind you. 
each drag of his cock felt too good, the head of him hitting the one spot over and over again that had you seeing stars. his fingers pressing tighter circles against your clit had you toppling over the edge. 
cunt spasming around him as your climax hit, the force of your release had your slumping against Ricks chest. face in against his throat and your hand squeezing around his cock as you tried steadying yourself. 
“there we go, atta fucking girl”
Shane’s praise hit your ears like a familiar melody, his hand soothing across your hip while continuing to rock into you. 
fighting off his climax as best he could, but your walls fluttering around him again had him toppling over. whining against Ricks throat at the feeling of Shane’s cum shooting into your warmth, each stutter thrust he gave spilling more of him into you. 
“jesus you’re perfect”
he pressed a kiss to your shoulder, both of hands softer now across your hips. keeping himself buried to the hilt, and keeping his cum stuffed in your pussy. 
Ricks hands cradled your face to pull you back from his neck, nodding his head as you met his gaze. 
on the pinnacle of his release, wanting to spill his load down your throat. his hands gently moved your head towards his cock. 
your mouth warm and welcoming, and your lips wrapped securely around his cock. 
he only had to give a couple bucks of his hips until he was groaning out your name, his climax hitting him and his cum shooting into your mouth. rope after rope of white filling the warm cavern of your mouth before pulling out to let you swallow. 
“shit— gonna let me fuck you now angel?”
swallowing down his release, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and standing upright against Shane again. 
readying yourself to answer when a call came over both of their radios, both of them groaning in annoyance. 
Shane reluctantly pulling out of your warmth and pressing another kiss to your shoulder while a pout worked its way into your face. 
“shit, we gotta go darlin’. think we can let you off with a warning now”
he told as they both tucked themselves back into their pants, Rick even helping to pull your panties back into place as Shane’s cum started to seep out of your cunt. 
Rick placing a kiss to your temple before they were both walking back to their car, calling out to them as they both opened their doors. 
“call me sometime”
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⋆˚࿔ reblogs are highly appreciated 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
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inkdrinkerworld · 6 months ago
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High Hopes 3
part one part two
cw: reader comes from a very tense and abusive home, verbal abuse, allusion to physical abuse, bad sibling relationships, fluff, angst, Remus is a sweetheart and the best almost bf ever
wc: 7.5k
Remus: On a scale of one to ten, how mad would you be if I said I found out your birthday passed and got you a gift?
You read the text as you’re exiting your class building and frown. Your birthday passed just after the new year, and you hadn’t told Remus because you hadn’t even been in the country. 
In lieu of an answer, you call him. Remus picks up on the second ring. 
“What did you get me?” He laughs down the line and you feel your stomach twist into knots. 
“Hello to you too, princess.” Since the Summer weekend sleepover thing (you’d still not decided what to call it), Remus had decided that was your new nickname and as much as you pretended to hate it, you loved it more than the others. 
“Hi Remus,” you breathe, eyes on the street as you cross and begin the walk back to your apartment. “What did you get me?” 
You can just tell he’s shaking his head. “It’s a present, why would I spoil that surprise?” 
“Because I’m impatient?” You rebut quickly. The walk back to your apartment is short, but the lingering winter makes it feel never ending. 
It also doesn’t help that you’d chosen style over cosiness- you’re in a long sleeved baby blue dress and a pair of boots that barely lick past your ankles. 
“I’m at your apartment, dove. I’ll give it to you when you get here.” 
Your eyes widen at the same time your heart constricts. “Remus, I’ve got like ten minutes left on my walk back!” 
As easily as he suggests anything to you, “Do you want me to come get you? It’s minus four right now.” 
“No, that wouldn’t make any sense,” you hear his car start. “Remus Lupin, I’m serious, I’m like one street away.” 
“So I’ll cut your walk short,” The engine roars across the line. “It’s cold, baby.” The fondness in his voice and his sparsely given ‘baby’ is what makes you stop. 
“Fine,” you try to sound much grumpier than you are and fail. “I’m at the coffee shop on the left.” 
Ten seconds later, Remus is there; his grey car collecting droplets of fine snow. 
“Hi,” you say as you slide in the passenger seat, your hands rubbing together making Remus frown. 
“And you wanted to finish the walk.” He flicks on the heating as he turns and goes back where he came. 
“How did you find out about my birthday?” You ask, fiddling with your bag to get out your water bottle. 
“Marlene mentioned that you wouldn’t be able to spend it with her this year and I asked when it was.” 
You hum, “It’s a little inconvenient having your birthday just after the new year,” Remus looks at you funny. “I like winter, don’t get me wrong, but a spring birthday would’ve been ideal. Like maybe in March.” 
He rolls his eyes, pulling into your parking lot. 
“How do you know when mine is?” He asks, helping you out of the car and then grabbing a bag out of the backseat. 
“Sirius and James talk a lot. Your gift is currently in transit.” 
Remus’ eyes shoot up, “When have you been hanging out with those two?” The ‘without me’ is implied and you look at him with a sly smile. 
“Jealous, Remus?” 
He tuts, figuring you out immediately. “You’re not winding me up, princess.” He holds the door open for you as you walk in and Remus sighs as he gets a whiff of your newest perfume. 
The couple of times he’s been to see you since the start of the semester, you’ve been wearing this intoxicatingly creamy vanilla perfume that has just a touch of something spicy to it that has been driving him mad. 
“Why would I be winding you up?” You toe off your boots and then look at him. “I’m gonna take the fastest shower known to man, but there’s food in the fridge and cookies in a Tupperware somewhere on the counter.” 
Remus shakes his head, setting his shoes beside yours. “I’ll wait for you, take your time.” 
You’re out of the bathroom in twenty minutes, in a matching jewel blue set of loungewear and a pair of socks. 
Your hair is tied back exposing a tiny tattoo behind your ear that Remus wants desperately to kiss. He’s on his laptop when you get out, typing away at what you assume is his book.
Remus doesn’t go here, he’s got a fancy writing degree already and he’s got an editing gig that he tries playing off as no big deal- but it is. 
He’s on ‘vacation’ though- meaning, he’s been on sick leave for the last four days so he can spend your first week back at school with you. Not that you know he’s been using his sick days for you. 
“Is roti okay? My mama dropped off some this morning.” Remus has yet to meet the old woman, but the fondness that overtakes your tone lets him know she’s at least half as lovely as you. 
“It’s perfect, dove. What do you want to look at?” He sets about finding your newest psychological thriller- Hannibal- and then makes his way into the kitchen to help you. 
“How was your day? I forgot to ask.” You mumble as you crack the ice into glasses before Remus pours some soda into them. 
“It was alright, got a couple more pages done of the book and then got high with Sirius.” 
You smile, a quiet smile that Remus thinks is going to stop his heart. “How was your classes?” 
You groan, “Long, boring and even longer.” He chuckles, leaving you to bring the glasses while he brings both plates to the living room. 
Remus sits in the corner of the sofa, he isn’t as slick as he thinks he is for sitting with a clearer view of the front door than you have. 
You appreciate the sentiment nonetheless. 
“Can I open the gift first?” Remus watches you with a rapt curiosity. He thinks you’re akin to a kid on Christmas- eyes bright, and hands shaking as you practically bounce in your seat. 
“Yeah baby,” he can’t help the sticky affection that slowly coats his words- an affection that only grows and spreads like warm honey. 
Remus watches you carefully tear the wrapping paper off the gift, his lips quirked just so as he watches your jaw drop. 
“You didn’t,” you murmur, shock and disbelief in your voice as you pull the wooden box out of the wrapping paper. 
“Open it,” the box in your lap is walnut colored, carved with spirals, flowers and dots and divots. The carvings are coloured in bright reds, oranges, yellows and some pinks. 
The lock resembles an ancient rusted clasp lock and as you unlatch it and reveal rows and stairs of chains. 
“Remus,” your voice is all clogged up and your bottom lip trembles and Remus wonders if he’s overdone it. 
“Yeah?” Your fingers trail along the crystal chips on the chains and you find your heart has cracked open. 
“This is the loveliest gift I’ve ever gotten,” the words are whispered into the air, your dinners cold as you take in every single chain in the box. “They’re for my glasses, yeah?”
“They are, pretty girl.” 
Silently, you close the box and put it to the side. “Thank you,” you blink and your tears tumble down your cheeks. His hands reach to wipe your cheeks gently. 
“You’re welcome.” You climb into his lap, Remus’ hands hold your hips. 
“You know you’re the first person since Marlene to get me something thoughtful?” 
Remus knows it’s meant to be a flippant comment, but his heart breaks for you. 
“Dove,” your heart clenches. “You’re breaking my heart.” His hands move up to cup your cheeks.
“I don’t mean to,” you say softly, shrugging one shoulder but Remus sees past the nonchalance you’re trying to exude. He doesn’t understand how someone as lovely as you has been treated so weirdly. 
He gives you an out though because he doesn’t want to push and push and push, “C’mon princess. Eat your dinner.” You take it and your plate as you press play. 
Remus notices you don’t move out of his lap but only smiles when you turn and start eating. 
“You’re staying the night?” You ask after you’ve both finished your dinner. 
Remus inhales, “What time is your first class tomorrow?” 
You pull away from him a little, “Eleven,” you have a hopeful look on your face that makes his answer easy. 
“Yeah I’ll stay the night.” 
You smile so big Remus thinks his heart stops. 
Then you get serious, “Wait, how do you feel about sharing the bed?” You ask the question softly, and Remus frowns. 
“I’ve shared the bed with you before, dove.” 
You shake your head, “I have a um,” you stumble for the words. Remus smiles. 
“A stuffy?” He asks quietly and you nod, nibbling away on your bottom lip. 
“Yeah a little yellow duckie,” Remus’ smile only widens. 
“That’s sweet, dove.” 
“You don’t think it’s silly?” He shakes his head. 
“How come I didn’t see it when we were at the other house?” He asks, his thumbs caressing your thighs. 
“I put him back in my suitcase, and I felt really bad about it too. I left it unzipped a little,” Remus kisses your temple as he chuckles. 
“You’re the sweetest fucking thing in the world.” 
Changing the conversation, “Do you want chai?” 
Remus’ eyebrows shoot up, “You have chai or do you need to make it?” 
You shake your head, a tired smile that’s a little teasing, “Jamie dropped it off for me when he came to see Lils.” 
Remus’ eyebrows shoot up even farther, “Jamie?” 
You giggle, “Yeah, s’what you guys call him.” 
Remus is a little indignant, “Jamie?” He repeats and you laugh even more. 
“Are you jealous, Remus?” 
Your hand reaches to the nape of his neck, twisting the sandy brown hair there as he deliberates. 
“Of James getting a nickname?” He asks and you nod, letting your fingers scratch his scalp a little. “No dove,” Remus fights the shiver that threatens to climb his back. “I’m not even a little jealous,” 
He leans into you, your noses bumping. “Why not?” Your breaths mingle as you lean even closer to Remus. 
“Because,” his hand cups your neck, his thumbs punching your chin upwards. Your chest heaves, “You’re already breathless and I haven’t even kissed you yet, princess.” 
“Please.” 
Remus smirks, wicked and impish. “No,” you whine and Remus almost rethinks his answer. “Go heat up your chai, pretty girl.” 
“You’re no fun,” you hop off his lap and head to the kitchen all the while Remus chuckles, his head against the back of the cushions as he watches you flit about the kitchen. 
-
The next time Remus sees you it’s after possibly one of the worst days of your life in a long time. Everything had gone wrong and there’d been a pit in your stomach all the way to your apartment. 
Just as you were about to walk in, your phone rang and without looking, you answered it. 
“Why does that boy keep going to your apartment?” 
You pull the phone from your ear and curse softly when you see, ‘Devil’s Right Hand,’ displayed on the screen. 
“What?” You really don’t have the energy today. 
Your father doesn’t seem to care though, “The boy. The one with the grey car.” 
As if you’re ten and not a grown ass woman, “Because we’re friends.” 
Simple, succinct and it would’ve been sufficient for any other regular parent. 
Your dad is anything but. 
“And he doesn’t leave till the morning? Do you think I’m an idiot?” 
The ‘yes’ in your brain wants so badly to slide off your tongue. You manage to bite it back. 
“I don’t understand the problem. I’m an adult, I can do as I please. You don’t even pay for the apartment, Mama does.” 
You hear the low simmering anger in your father’s tone. “Your grandmother gives you too much leeway.” 
You roll your eyes, “I’m not in the mood for a fight, was that all you wanted to know?” 
“Girl, watch your tone, it’s not a long drive to your place.” 
You shiver at the threat. “Can I go please? I have coursework to do and I’ve got exams to prep for later this week.” 
“Oh sure, coursework. Come home this weekend, your grandparents are at the house on Sunday.” 
Your body sags as you hang up the phone, the backs of your eyes burn with exhaustion. 
With a sigh, you unlock the door and get into your apartment. 
You don’t even bother to change or sit still, instead you just jump straight into your work; hours pass before your phone rings again. 
This time, it’s Remus.
“Hey,” he doesn’t like your tone, or the way you sigh the word. 
“Hi dove, I’m outside.” 
You’re relieved when you see him. He looks warm and cosy. His hair looks pillow soft and his sweater is a faded yellow one against the brown of his corduroy jeans. 
“I brought snacks,” he says, jingling a plastic bag in his hand.
You don’t smile quite as big as you normally would’ve and Remus frowns. “Long day?” He asks as he steps in, kissing your forehead when you nod. 
“Yeah, I’m just finishing up my coursework and we can have dinner.” 
Remus waits for you, busying himself with plating up dinner- leftover Chinese food from yesterday. 
“C’mon baby,” he murmurs, rubbing your back as he sets both plates on the coffee table and starts the tv. “Have some food and then get back to it if you like, but I need you to eat.” 
You look to argue, but he’s not commanding you. He’s not demanding anything from you, he’s nudging you to look after yourself. 
For a moment, you get stuck in just looking at him and your mind whirs. Remus is unlike anyone else in your life- he doesn’t take, he doesn’t shout and make threats, he doesn’t force you into a box or anything of the sort. 
Instead, he gives you room and watches you, watches you be yourself and encourages you to be yourself. It makes you emotional for a minute, the back of your throat burning as you come to the realisation. 
 “Coming,” you whisper, Remus’ eyes track your movements, and he smiles a little when you sit right up beside him, your forearms brushing. 
Dinner is quiet, little conversation here and there because Remus can tell you’re exhausted. 
In that sense, he washes up the dishes while you shower and he tidies up the living room before double checking your door is locked. 
He’s pouring hot water over the tea bags when you come out of your room, dressed in the softest look pyjamas he’s ever seen. 
“Oh you look cosy, princess.” You go bashful under the lovestruck tone to his words, walking into the arms he has open. 
One hand goes to the base of your neck, holding firm as his other hand squeezes around your back. 
“Tired?” He whispers into your hair and you hum. 
“I can have a cuppa though, not that tired.” 
You barely make it halfway through your cup before your eyes are closing and your head is lolling onto Remus’ shoulder. 
“Poor girl,” he murmurs, setting his cup down and sliding his hands under your thighs and around your back. “S’okay dove,” he coos as you stir, your nose brushed up to his neck as he walks to your bedroom. 
“Stay,” you mumble as he sets you down and Remus smiles. 
“M’right here dovey, not going a place.”
Remus wakes up to you moving around in bed, your legs kicking and your body thrashing. 
“Hey,” he croaks, voice cracking from sleep. “Dovey,” he mumbles, his hand rubbing your arm. “Baby wake up.” 
His nose brushes your cheek, hands shaking your shoulder a bit as your tossing worsens. 
“Wake up dove,” he whispers, stroking your neck. 
“Remus?” Your voice shakes, eyes open wide as you try to get your bearings.
“It’s me baby, I’m right here.” Your heart is racing as you sit up, Remus following suit. 
“Sorry,” you whimper, brushing your cheeks as you feel tears fall. Remus flicks on your lamp and his eyebrows thread together.
“Nothing to be sorry about,” He tucks you into his side. “Wanna talk to me about it?” 
His hand creeps under your shirt, his knuckles dragging up and down your spine. 
“Was just a dream,” you whisper, not quite sounding yourself. “A bad dream.” 
Remus nods, “Yeah, it was just a dream, pretty girl. Your pulse is pounding though, babe.” He can feel the harsh beat of it against the knuckles on your back. 
You shut your eyes, reliving the scenes in the dream vividly. 
“It’s a recurring thing,” you start, letting yourself be comforted by Remus’ hand on your back and the faint scent of his citrus soap. “I’m little again and my dad is blue mad, breaking glass and screaming in my face.” 
You take a shuddering breath and Remus tries his best not to react with his body. 
“I was about ten or eleven I think, by that time our relationship wasn’t salvageable. I can’t even remember what he was so upset about but I always seemed like the perfect target. ‘Specially when I started telling him off for being mean to my mum.” 
“Baby this was real?” You nod, Remus lets himself for a moment, imagine little you stopping grown adults from arguing and he feels his chest tighten at the thought. 
“He tried coming at me and mum with a piece of the glass. It was just a mess. The fight only stopped because our neighbours came to get me.” 
He feels your tears wet his shirt, but he doesn’t care. Not when you’ve started shaking again. 
“You’re alright baby,” his words sound like a promise whispered into your hairline. “You don’t have to go back to that, I swear you don’t.” 
“I think the reason I had a nightmare was because he called earlier. Said to come home on Sunday and that he knew you were staying over.” 
Remus can’t stop himself from stiffening then. He hates the frustration and defeat in your voice. 
“Do you want me to come with you on Sunday?” The offer is as easy as the breath he inhales. 
You look up at him, eyelashes wet and stuck together, lips and cheeks swollen from crying. 
“I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Remus smiles- a sad smile. 
“You didn’t ask,” he kisses your nose. “Think about it okay? I won’t be offended if you say no, pretty girl.” 
You nod and tuck yourself back into him. 
“Do you think you can go back to sleep or do you wanna watch something?” 
You think for a long time, “Will you hold me till I fall asleep?” 
God his heart really is breaking. Who could hurt you? 
“Till you wake up, dove.” 
Remus wakes up before you do, his arms still wrapped around you, and you’re more on his chest than on the bed. 
His mind wakes faster than his body, racing with thoughts of little you and the things you’ve lived. He finds that you hide it well. The hurt, the pain, the everything. One look at you wouldn’t reveal that, all anyone would see is a rich girl living with her parents and doing whatever she pleases; but under the surface? 
You’re so like everyone else, but so singular that it stops his breath a little. 
You don’t have class today, so he decides quite quickly that he’s letting you sleep in. The only thing you have to do is finish the last bit of your coursework and then Remus thinks a day doing your favourite things- shopping for books and having tea- is in order. 
He also wants to start breakfast, you’d mentioned a couple nights ago that you’d been craving blueberries and he’d had a hankering for pancakes. 
Remus tries moving out from under you but your fist closes around his shirt and he stays put. 
Breakfast can wait a bit. 
“Remmy?” You wake shortly after, the sunlight peeking through the curtains tickling your eyes. 
“Yes, dove?” His hand is stroking your arm, his blunt fingernails dragging slowly makes it hard for you to open your eyes. 
“Time is it?” You stretch as he reaches for his phone. 
“Just gone past ten,” you settle right back into his chest with a sigh. 
“Can you wake me up again at eleven?” You ask at the same time Remus asks, 
“Do you wanna go out for breakfast?” 
You hum, “What’re we having?” 
A yawn tears apart his answer, “Blueberry pancakes? Or bagels? Either or, I don’t mind.” 
“Are you making pancakes?” He can already tell where the question is headed. 
“Yes, do you have everything for them?” You nod then you shake your head. 
“Except the blueberries.” 
Remus pulls you and the covers a little closer. “Want me to go in to the grocery and get them?” You shake your head. 
“I’ll settle for whatever fruit I’ve got in the house.” Remus tuts. 
“Would you prefer blueberries?” He asks, his fingers dancing across the nape of your neck. 
“Yeah,” that’s all he needed to hear. 
“I’ll make you some tea and head out,” Remus isn’t allowed to slide out from under you, your thigh on his hip pins him down.
“You don’t have to,” you say bashfully, an intense guilt that’s completely unnecessary creeps into your voice and Remus has to slide his hands to your neck and push your chin up under your jaw. 
“You’re not inconveniencing me, pretty girl. I’m getting them, coming back here and making pancakes and then we’re going either to the beach or the bookstore.” 
You shake your head as best as you can with Remus holding your jaw. “You don’t have to do all of this just because I had a bad dream.” 
He tuts, “I want to take care of you. I’ll just be fifteen minutes.” 
You nod, accepting your defeat in the argument. 
In the time Remus is gone, you find yourself going through photo albums and reminiscing on the days when things were a lot easier. 
You stop on a picture of you and your grandmother and you sigh. Grabbing your phone, you dial her number. 
“Hello, Mama?” Your voice wavers as you speak. 
“Yes, Bebo?” You smile at the sound of her voice. Instantly, you feel like you’re being swaddled in her arms and like your troubles are eased. Your home name falling from her mouth with such familiarity also makes your chest ache. 
“I’m having trouble,” you say honestly. “I don’t know how to forgive anymore.” 
She sighs, you can hear shuffling in the back and things knocking about and then you hear your grandmother’s voice. “Bebo, you don’t have to forgive everybody.” She says, and you sniffle. “Not everyone needs that, or deserves that.” When you don’t answer she worries. You and your grandmother have an insanely close relationship, summers were spent in her back garden and on the beach near her house. She knows you as well as you can know any person. 
“Do you want me to come over? I can bring you lunch.” You take a minute to consider and know in your heart of hearts that she would be on her way if you said yes. 
“No,” you take the conversation to a different direction quickly. “Are you coming over on Sunday? Dad said.” 
You can hear the smile in her voice, “Yeah, I miss my grandkids, Bebo.” 
You’d seen her just three days ago but it feels like a month ago. “I miss you too, Mama. Would it be weird if I brought someone for dinner?” 
She gasps, always one for a good bit of gossip. “Like a boyfriend? Bebo, I’ve been waiting for this!” She sounds so excited that the image of her smiling wide behind her glasses warms your heart. 
“You don’t think dad will make it a thing?” 
She puffs out air, “Your dad would make the sun coming out a thing if he wanted to. I need you to not live your life according to him, Bebo. He’s my son, but he’s a little shit and he doesn’t rule you or anyone else.” 
You sigh, chest shaking under the weight of your withheld thoughts. 
“Is that why you don’t want me coming over? Your boyfriend is over?” You giggle, feeling weirdly like she’s right beside you as you tuck your phone between your cheek and shoulder. 
“He went to get blueberries because I wanted pancakes, and he’s not my boyfriend, Mama.” She scoffs, you smile. 
“But you like him and he’s nice?” 
“Super nice, like tooth rotting nice. And he’s really gentle and calm too.” 
You can see your grandmother’s smile, and find yourself doing the same. Even more so when you hear the knock on your door. 
“You deserve nice, gentle and calm, Bebo. I’m sorry I couldn’t have kept you kids for longer.” 
“Mama,” you gasp the words as you look through the peephole and find Remus standing there with the groceries. “You did and are doing enough. You’re not in charge of his actions, he is.” 
Remus’ eyes narrow as he sees your glassy eyes as he steps into the apartment. 
“I know Bebo, I know.” 
“I gotta go, but I’ll call you to let you know if I’m coming okay? If I am, would you bring,” she cuts you off. 
“Of course I’ll bring you coconut fudge Bebo, I’ll make it on Saturday so it doesn’t get stale.” 
Remus starts about the kitchen, but you can tell he’s intrigued about the conversation- or at the least, who you’re on the phone with. 
“Thanks Mama, I love you.” You see a little smile break out of his face even as he faces away from you to measure the flour. 
“I love you too Bebo, go enjoy your boyfriend.” You laugh scandalously and hear her chuckle before you hang up. 
“How’s your grandma?” Remus asks as you come into the kitchen and sit on the counter near him. 
“She’s good. I called her to talk about the nightmare but I kept getting too sad so we just talked about other stuff.” You swing your feet as you watch Remus mix the wet and dry ingredients. 
“Is she also going to dinner on Sunday?” He poses it conversationally, because it is but he also wants a feel for who’s there at these dinners. 
You nod, stealing a blueberry from the carton. “She’s always there. I think she comes because she knows if she’s there my dad will be in check for the whole night;” you smile when you eat the blueberry and find it’s sweet. “She’s pretty scary when she needs to be.” 
“I don’t doubt that, dove. You’re the same way, can tell there’s a little fire behind all that niceness.” 
You roll your eyes, “Whatever you say Lupin,” Remus sets your griddle on and oils it as it heats up. “Would you really want to come on Sunday?” 
He pours three pancakes on, “Unless I have to do something strange, then yes I want to come.” 
“If I told you that there was an initiation process that everyone’s super anal about, that would be a deal breaker?” Remus looks at you wide eyed and then notices your poorly hidden smile. 
“You’re a menace.” He says as he flips the pancakes, another raucous laugh bubbling out of you. 
“On occasion.” Remus stacks three for you and reaches for the syrup in the cupboard above your head. “But Mama, my granny, will probably badger you about your ‘intentions’ and whatever else.” 
You thank Remus for the pancakes with a kiss on his cheek. “Eat,” he says, cutting your pancakes for you, making you smile. “I can handle badgering. But I should warn you, I don’t hide anger well.” 
You wave off his concern. “Oh he won’t be out of line, Mama keeps him in check. And I just ignore him anyways.” Remus doesn’t like the way you shrug like your dad being a prick is no big deal, but he decides you’ve shared enough for the day. 
You don’t start eating till he makes his own stack and switches off the stove and that makes him smile a little. 
“Do you have a preference for the beach or the bookstore?” He asks in between bites of breakfast. 
You think for a moment, “Can we go to the bookstore? There’s a couple books I want to check on.” 
Remus nods, not really caring where you go, just that you do something you like. 
-
You decide against Remus joining you, not sure if you’re ready for him to see the circus that is your family. 
Your Mama is on the front porch, sipping what you know is coffee as you get out your car. 
You send Remus a text, Made it. I’ll let you know how it goes. 
His response is immediate, My offer to come get you is always on the table, princess
“Where’s your boyfriend?”She asks, standing to hug you.
“Told him that it might be too much, didn’t want to scare him off.” You try to sound as chipper as possible, but your grandmother knows you. 
“He’s not in control of you anymore, Bebo. You can’t give it to him.” 
You nod, diverting the conversation. “How’d the fudge turn out?” 
You have a couple bricks with her and your older brother in the garden out back before they’re ready to serve dinner. 
There’s a quiet stillness that covers the remaining winter, the coffee and coconut milk fudge just enough to make it seem like the tranquillity could last forever. 
“Mama said you have a boyfriend?” your older brother asks, protectiveness and amusement in his tone as you look up at him wide eyed and shocked. 
“I told her he’s not my boyfriend. Not yet.” 
“She really wants him to be. He made her pancakes and he spent the night.” You tut at your grandmother’s gossiping. 
Your brother smiles, “I’d like to meet him sometime, you look happy again.” You just nod, scared that you might say something that gives away how much you really really like Remus. 
“Dinner’s ready,” your mum comes out on the porch, giving all three of you a soft smile before going back in. 
Dinner is great until the round-the-table questions get to you. You’d avoided it for a couple courses, but it appears your luck is out. 
“How was your coursework?” Your dad says it like it was an actual lie, you don’t miss the vile amusement in his tone, like he’s waiting to catch you in a lie.
“Lots of reading, but I think I got above 85 which is great considering this professor is known for failing students for less than 75.” 
Your dad isn’t satisfied. “What was it about?” 
You stiffen in your chair, you don’t like the implication that you’re lying. “Capital punishment, recidivism and how the two coincide.” 
Your mum can tell your dad is still not pleased, so can your grandmother and she sets him right with a look. 
“Do you need her professors to start running their coursework topics through you? Are you going to call the school next because you disbelieve everything?” 
The table is tense as your grandmother and your dad have a stare off- not that she’s at all concerned about him. 
Your younger siblings feed off your dad’s energy, their own question hot and ready and aimed at anyone with answers.
 “How is it fair that she moved out?” And “Why does Mama pay for her apartment and not just tell her to move back home? It’s silly how much she’ll do for attention.” Or “Maybe if she just came home dad wouldn’t be so upset?” You can’t even get a word in, stunned silent as you realise this is how they see you.
It’s when your younger brother and sister say, “You always make it about you, you’re Mama’s favourite and that pisses us off. Dad doesn’t like you because you think you’re better than us, and it would all be better if you just made a clear decision- do you want to be in the family or not?”, that your breath quickens at their words, your heartbeat roaring in your ears. 
The part that hurts is that they’re too young to know all the things that have happened, they don’t get why it’s so hard for you to sit here even on bi-weekly Sunday dinners and play nice with your dad.
Your food suddenly loses taste when your dad sends an evil smile your way, your stomach rolling.
They don’t understand that you’ve taken their beatings, that you’ve suffered horrid treatment just so they wouldn’t have to.
“Either way, we don’t care. I think we’d be better off without you if I’m honest. All you do is mope and complain, you wouldn’t even have half the shit you do if it wasn’t for dad. He’s not the monster you make him out to be.” 
Your older brother cut them glares, “Enough! You don’t speak for this entire table, find somewhere else to be.” They scamper off, your brother doesn’t even give your dad the time of day, he looks at you immediately. 
“Go take a walk, Bebo.” He’s the only one of them that likes you, the only out of three siblings that actually knows you, that knows what this is doing to you and you’re grateful for it. 
Mama sparks into heavy, brash Urdu, all of it aimed at your father who more than deserves it- these are his spawn. 
You try to think through your feelings, try to sort them into neat and tidy boxes but it just winds you. 
You can't take deep breaths, they’re all shallow and sharp. Your chest aches, a concave feeling to it as you worry about the sharpness of your breath. It only worsens your ability, your breathing even shallower and you can’t seem to stop the cycle. 
You reach for your phone, pulling up a breathing video and trying your best to follow it, your breathing evening the longer you follow along. 
When you can inhale fully, you call Remus. You need him. 
He picks up on the second ring, “Hi, dovey. Everything okay?” 
“I think I should’ve let you come.” Your voice sounds ragged, like you need to cry and Remus’ skin prickles. He wishes he was there too. 
“Need me to come up there?” You debate it, you really do, and maybe if you didn’t feel like such a shitty person right now you would’ve said ‘no,’ but you need Remus and his sound mind and advice. 
“It’s a thirty minute drive.” you say, hearing things rustling in the back and Remus moves the phone from his mouth as he calls to someone. 
“I’m heading out, text me if you need anything.” Then the phone is closer. “Just had to tell Siri and Jamie. I’m on my way, princess.” 
“Drive safely, Remmy.” you sound so sad, Remus wishes he could just apparate to you now. 
“I’ll see you soon, baby. Stay somewhere safe, yeah.”
Tears gather in your eyes at how easily Remus could tell that you were frightened, that you’re in need of some place soft to land. God, you can’t wait for him to be here. 
The front door opens, your older brother coming out on the porch with a heavy sigh. 
“You have to tell them Bebo,” he says softly and you shake your head. 
“Why? So they can think I’m just lying to make him look bad. I’m okay with this arrangement.” 
Your brother takes a seat on the porch swing and pats a spot next to him. 
“Are you actually?” You inhale, thinking it over for a brief moment. 
“It hurts, of course it does. But I used to be mean too, this is them being mean back.” 
Your brother rolls his eyes, “It’s not like they’re ten. They’re sixteen and they’re horrid.” You take your spot next quickly- like if you chance a slow moment the tears will come. 
“But just to me. You get to be the best sibling they have, while I’m the problem black sheep sibling who can’t help but be macabre.” 
“You’re not macabre. You know you’re not. You just lived some dark shit to spare them and it’s time to stop. They can handle it.” You wish you could do it, it might make things easier, but you’re scared. 
“Maybe next time, it’s too charged in there now.” You sigh, head touching the back of the swing. “Do you think I’ll ever have their love?” The tears stream down your cheeks anyway as you think about the idea, as you hear their words rattle around your head. 
Your brother sighs hard, not sure if your siblings would ever wake up from your dad’s spell. Instead of saying anything, he guides your head to his shoulder. “Take a nap, Bebo.” 
“Remus is coming soon. Would you wake me when he gets here?”
“‘Course, Bebo.”
Your grandmother comes out right after you fall asleep, touching your sticky cheek with a weathered hand. 
“They’ll break her, you know. They’ll break her spirit and she won’t hold back anymore.” She sounds sad, like she can see it happening already.
“Mama, she won’t break.”  your brother says, reaching for her but she bats him away. 
“She’s not like you. You brush it off, she can’t. It weighs her heart. Every time she leaves here she looks so sad, so heavy and cracked. I can’t see her crack again, do you remember it?” 
Tears fall down her cheeks, but she doesn’t try to wipe them, she just stares at your sleeping form. 
Your brother sighs, leaning on her shoulder as she sits on his other side. “I remember,” he says quietly, the memories of you being withdrawn dancing behind his eyes. “Her boyfriend is coming here.”
“Really?” She asks and your brother nods. 
“She told me to wake her up when he gets here.” 
Mama smiles, “I’m glad she called him.” 
Remus arrives about forty minutes later, your brother sitting beside you about to shake your shoulder when Remus steps out of the car and shakes his head. 
“Let her sleep a little,” your brother’s confused by his request. 
“She asked me to wake you when you get here.” 
Remus smiles despite his anger. He’d stewed all the way to your dad’s house, wondering if you’d be hurt, if you’d not find a quiet place and the argument would keep going. 
He didn’t know what he was walking into, and finding you asleep is much more welcome than the sadder visions of his brain. 
“Would you tell me what it’s all about? Or what sparked it all today?” 
Remus sits on the floor near the foot of the swing, his hand holding onto your ankle as he looks to your brother. 
It’s clear to him, your brother, that Remus cares about you. His eyes haven’t strayed from you for more than thirty seconds, always coming back to rove over your face like he’s making sure you’re still there and still okay. 
Your brother hesitates- he’s never spoken about this with someone outside of the family. “They have warped perceptions of her; our younger brother and sister. They think she’s ungrateful and just doesn’t come home to get dad riled up- she doesn’t come home because they don’t know what she’s done so they didn’t have to get the dad we got.” 
Remus frowns harder, his thumb rubbing a circle on your ankle. 
“And she doesn’t want to tell them?” There’s no judgement in his tone, just curiosity. 
Your brother shakes his head. “She doesn’t think they’d believe her at this point. I’m always trying to talk her into it, but I think it runs a bit too deep to dredge up just like that.” 
Remus nods, eyes fixated on you as you sleep. “Will she want to tell them goodbye?” 
Your brother smiles, “If you leave without meeting our grandma, I think she’ll never forgive you for leaving without her ice cream.” 
Remus laughs, nodding as he stands. 
“You should wake her up first, I’ll go tell Mama you’re here.” Remus waits till your brother walks off into the house to sit beside you. 
You’re not sure how long you’ve been asleep, but sometime later you feel Remus’ hand on your cheek, thumb a little calloused as it rubs at the apple. 
Only he wakes you up this gently. 
“Princess, wake up. Miss your face.” 
“Hey,” your eyes peel open slowly, a little smile spreading on your face. 
Remus’ smile is small, but not forced. He could never do that with you looking up at him- especially with your sleepy eyes. 
“Was the drive okay?” 
He chuckles, it’s belated that you notice you’re alone with him on your front porch. Your brother’s car is still parked outside and so is your grandmother’s. 
“Yeah it was, pretty girl.” 
Remus kisses your forehead, his hand holding your face even though it’s a little sticky with your dried tears. 
“Your brother went to get Mama.” He says softly, letting you twist your body so you were leaning into him. Your entire front body was pressing against his ribs. 
“I’m so tired, Remmy.” Your voice cracks as you speak, Remus can’t bear it. He hates it that you’re this sad. 
“I know baby,” his words are whispered into your hairline, his hand moving to cup the back of your head as he feels the quiet tears soak his shirt. “We don’t have to stay here any longer than you want to.” 
You sniffle and nod, letting Remus pull you further into his lap so he can hold you. 
“This is Mama,” you hear your brother’s voice and the light steps of your grandmother and then feel Remus lean forward. You assume he wanted you off his lap, but his hand anchors your hip to his as he shakes the older woman’s hand. 
“Remus.” He introduces himself and she smiles. 
“You’re handsome,” you laugh when you catch Remus’ cheeks flushing. “I have your ice cream here, Bebo. He won’t come out, locked himself away in his office.” 
You shrug, “Doesn’t matter. I’m ready to go.” Remus nods, taking the tub of ice cream for you, letting you climb off his lap before standing. 
“Give me two minutes, baby.” You kiss his jaw as you go, the car keys in your hand.
“She’ll be okay right?” 
Your brother smiles at Remus, Mama frowns. 
“She’s a fighter.” He says but Mama shakes her head. 
“She might not have any more fight left in her.” 
Remus knows what she means to say. He remembers how Sirius had been, the brave faces and attitude to hide how sad he was. He looks at the car and spots you with your head against the glass. 
“Just be patient with her.” Mama says and Remus nods.  “She’ll tell you everything soon enough. She looks at you like you individually hung the stars.” 
Remus blushes again, not really knowing what to say. 
Your older brother pats his shoulder and goes inside, “I think I’ll head out too.” He goes to his car, but not before stopping at Remus’ and giving you a kiss to your forehead. 
Remus frowns, “Does everyone disperse after they fight like this?” He asks your grandmother, not wanting to push but trying to understand. 
“Bebo can’t take more of this, you’ll see. I set him straight, he leaves her alone for months and then starts over. It’s like a cat and a mouse- always prodding and slapping and poking until the mouse has had enough.” 
“And the mouse does what when they’ve had enough?” 
Mama smiles, like she’s holding out just a sliver of hope that it will happen. “Revolt.” 
Remus gives her a hug and makes his way to the car. 
As soon as he opens the door, you smile. Tired lines all over your face as your eyes barely open. 
“Wanna stay over?” You ask, cheek smushed to your shoulder as you look at Remus. 
“How abouts you come over to mine? I’ve got fluffy blankets,” Remus kisses that spot where your forearm and upper arm meet. “Oatmeal raisin and chocolate chip cookies,” a kiss to your shoulder, right on the beauty mark. “And I’ve got all your favourites on dvd.” 
The last kiss is right on the corner of your mouth, chaste and sweet and it makes you smile even more. 
“Sirius and James won’t mind?” 
Remus rolls his eyes, “They’ve gone on their own lover’s retreats today.” Wrong, Remus kicked them out the second he’d hung the phone with you. 
“Okay, but can we stop by my place to get my stuffy?” 
Remus chuckles, “Course we can, dovey. That way we’ll both have clothes at each other’s place.” 
You tut, clipping on your seatbelt as Remus turns over the engine. “You’re not getting your sweater back, Remus.” 
He only rolls his eyes as he pulls out of your dad’s yard, tipping his chin to the ice cream tub. “Will that be okay on the drive?” 
You nod, “Yeah, we can have some with the cookies tonight.” 
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