#And pour one out for the dead (links)
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heads up y'all, only the second link and the second one from nero-neptune is working. The 3rd from from them is restricted and requires access, everything else is unfortunately dead.
This is definitely not a google drive full of the sleep stuff from the Headspace app, including sleepcasts, music, and wind down meditation, that normally costs 17.99 a month, no siree and you definitely shouldnt share this with people
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SANTA BABY ━━ wnba!paige bueckers x reader
𝜗𝜚 ━ summary: during your christmas trip to NYC, you have a surprise waiting for paige back at the hotel.
𝜗𝜚 ━ word count: 4.9K
𝜗𝜚 ━ warnings: sexual content (munch p, scissoring)
𝜗𝜚 ━ links: my masterlist
𝜗𝜚 ━ author’s note: my christmas eve gift to y’all …. it was almost taken away tho because of that usc game ask the gc man i was crashing out
THE CITY is buzzing even at this hour, cold wind cutting through the streets as Paige makes her way back to the hotel. She tugs her coat tighter around herself, her hands jammed into her pockets to ward off the sting of the December chill. New York City is magical this time of year, but it’s also freezing, and she can’t wait to get back to the suite, where it’s warm—and more importantly, where you are.
This trip has been a mix of business and pleasure. She had a couple of sponsorship obligations to knock out and a media appearance scheduled for tomorrow, but mostly, it’s just an excuse to spend a few uninterrupted days with you. Both of your schedules have been so hectic lately—hers with the grind of off-season and the stress of Unrivaled about to start, and yours with work—and carving out this time feels like a luxury. It’s the last weekend before Christmas, and since you’re both gonna be spending the holiday with your families together, this is your time to celebrate just the two of you.
Paige hurries into the hotel, rubbing her hands together as she steps into the elevator. She flexes her fingers, still stiff from gripping a basketball for hours during her workout with Stewie and Sabrina. She promised you that she wouldn’t let it run late, and, as she glances at her phone to see the time, she’s satisfied that she fulfilled it.
Her sneakers hit the polished floor with soft thuds as she unlocks the door to the suite. The space is lavish, the kind of indulgence she spent because one, it’s the holidays, and two, she wanted this weekend to be perfect for the two of you. The warmth of the suite embraces her immediately, the city’s chill feeling miles away here. She shrugs off her coat, tossing it over the couch, and kicks off her sneakers.
“Baby, I’m back!” she calls, her voice echoing faintly in the spacious suite. When she came in, she assumed that you’d be in the living room, curled up on the couch with a blanket and whatever Netflix show you’ve been binge-watching. But the living room is empty, the TV off.
Her brows furrow as she looks around, scanning for signs of you. “You in the bedroom?” she calls out, though there’s still no answer. Her pulse picks up, not in worry, but in curiosity. She hums, wondering where you’re hiding.
The hallway feels quiet as she moves down it, pushing open the door to the bedroom. The sight that greets her makes her stop dead in her tracks, feet planted in the doorway.
The lights are dim, the warm glow casting a soft, golden hue across the room. A bottle of wine sits on the nightstand, one glass already poured and in your hand. But it’s you that holds her attention, that makes her brain short-circuit entirely.
You’re sprawled out on the bed, leaning back against the pillows with a smirk that could stop traffic. And you’re wearing—Paige feels her throat go dry—this tiny, ridiculously sexy Christmas lingerie set. The red satin clings to you in all the right places, barely covering what it’s meant to, and the white fur trim is so playful, so sinful, she doesn’t know whether to laugh or groan. The ribbon on the front of your bra is tied in a neat little bow, teasingly undone just enough to look like you’d barely bothered. The matching panties sit high on your hips, connected to sheer thigh-high stockings by the tiniest garters she’s ever seen.
She doesn’t even realize she’s standing completely still until you grin at her, your voice playful and sweet as you say, “Hi, baby.”
Paige blinks, her brain struggling to catch up as she stares at you. Her heart is pounding, adrenaline giving way to something much more visceral. The way you’re looking at her, the way the light catches the curve of your body—it’s like she’s seeing you for the first time all over again. She lets out a low, shaky breath, her hand running through her hair as her eyes continue to rove over your figure. Her stomach constricts, her whole body coiled so tight she’s not sure if she wants to drop to her knees or throw herself at you. Maybe both.
“Fuck, ma,” she finally manages, her voice low and husky as she steps forward. Her hands flex instinctively, wanting to touch you, needing to touch you. “You tryna kill me?”
You giggle, the sound light and sweet, but the glint in your eyes is anything but innocent. “No,” you say, tilting your head slightly as you take a slow sip from your wine glass. Your smirk widens, and Paige swears her knees almost buckle.
She exhales sharply, inching closer to the bed. “You look…” Her voice trails off, her gaze roaming over you like she’s trying to memorize every inch of your body. “Jesus, baby, you look insane.”
You’re still grinning as she reaches the edge of the bed, her hands resting on the mattress as she leans down slightly, bringing her face level with yours. Her pulse races, her body buzzing with anticipation as her eyes lock with yours. “You did this for me?” she asks softly, though she already knows the answer.
“Who else?” you ask, grinning, your voice a teasing lilt that makes Paige’s chest tighten. You set your wine glass down on the nightstand, your eyes never leaving hers.
Paige is already leaning forward, her hands sliding to your thighs, the warmth of your skin and the delicate fabric of your lingerie making her head spin. “You’re gon’ be the death of me,” she murmurs, shaking her head a little as her lips brush against yours lightly, hands tightening on your legs. And God, if this is how she goes, she’ll thank you for it.
Her lips finally lock onto yours, slow at first, like she’s savoring the moment. The kiss is soft, tender, but there’s an edge to it—like she’s holding herself back, barely. Her hands tighten on your thighs, sliding higher, the heat of your skin burning through the thin satin, and she swears she feels you shiver beneath her touch.
You kiss her back, your arms looping around her neck to pull her closer, and that’s all the invitation Paige needs. She shifts, climbing onto the bed, her knees sinking into the mattress as she presses herself against you. The warmth of your body sends a rush of heat through her, and she deepens the kiss, her tongue brushing against yours as she loses herself in the taste of you.
“You’re fuckin’ unreal,” she murmurs against your mouth, her voice barely above a whisper but heavy with meaning. Her lips leave yours only to trail down your jaw, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses along the curve of your neck.
Her hands roam as her mouth works. One slides up to cup the back of your neck, her thumb brushing over your jaw to tilt your head just the way she likes. The other settles firmly on your hip, her grip strong enough to keep you exactly where she wants you, though her fingers twitch like she’s desperate to touch you everywhere at once.
The scent of you—the faint lotion you always wear, mixed with the wine you’ve been drinking—fills her senses, and Paige feels drunk on it, drunk on you. Her lips find the sensitive spot just below your ear, and when she hears the soft, breathy sound you make in response, it sends a jolt of electricity straight through her.
“Damn,” she mutters, her teeth grazing your skin lightly before she soothes the spot with her tongue.
Your hands tug at the hem of her long-sleeve shirt, and she sits back just enough to let you pull it over her head. You toss it somewhere behind her, leaving her in her sports bra. Her abs flex slightly in the cool air, but the way your eyes roam over her makes her feel anything but cold. She watches you, her chest heaving, her pupils blown wide as you reach out to touch her, your hands sliding over her shoulders and down her torso, leaving a trail of fire in their wake.
And then she’s diving back in, her kisses lower now, lips finding the delicate line of your collarbone, pressing open-mouthed kisses there like she’s starving for you—which, she is. Her tongue darts out to taste your skin, her teeth scraping against you enough to leave you shivering. She feels your fingers tangle in her hair, undoing her ponytail as you pull her closer. Her breath quickens slightly, chest heaving with just how much she wants you.
Her fingers find the ribbon on your bra, tugging at it gently as her lips brush over the swell of your cleavage. “This,” she mutters, her voice muffled against your skin, “is fucking killin’ me.” She pulls back just enough to look at you, her thumb brushing over the satin. “You tied it so pretty for me, huh? Knowing I’d lose my damn mind?”
You laugh softly, breathily, fingers tangling further in her hair. “Maybe.”
“Slut,” Paige mutters, grinning as she tugs the bow loose with one sharp pull, letting the fabric fall open, your perky tits popping out of it. Her breath catches as she sees you fully now, blue eyes darkening with something heavy, something primal.
“Goddamn, mama,” she breathes, her hands sliding along your sides, thumbs brushing over your ribs. She leans down again, her lips brushing against the curve of your breast. “You’re so beautiful, so sexy, so perfect, baby. It ain’t even fair.”
And then her mouth closes around your nipple, her tongue swirling over the sensitive skin as she sucks gently, and the sound you make in response sends a jolt straight through her. She groans softly, her free hand sliding up to cup your other breast. She alternates between kisses and soft bites, her lips tugging gently at your nipple before soothing the spot with her tongue. Her breath is hot against your skin, and she presses closer, hips grinding against yours just a little as her mouth moves.
“Such perfect tits,” she murmurs against your cleavage, her teeth grazing you again as she switches to your other breast.
She licks a slow, careful path across your skin, savoring every inch of you as she begins to lower once more. Her mouth leaves a wet trail down your stomach, her tongue occasionally flicking out to taste the faint salt on your skin. Her hands slide down from your chest, settling on your waist. She grips the skin hard, pinching slightly. Her lips brush over the curve of your belly, then down to the soft plane just above your hips, like she’s mapping every part of you with her tongue.
She pauses for a moment, just long enough to lift her head and admire the way the red lace hugs your skin. The fabric is delicate, so inviting, it’s like it was made to drive her insane. The sheer material leaves almost nothing to her imagination, and the sight of it—of you and your perfect pussy—sends a rush of wetness to her own core.
She just shakes her head a little, as if in disbelief, before lowering again, her lips grazing the edge of the lace as her fingers grip your hips tighter. She can feel the heat radiating from you, the way your body tenses slightly beneath her, the way you say her name, and it makes her head spin.
Her tongue flicks out, tracing the edge of the fabric, teasing. She presses a kiss just below your navel, then another, breath warm. “You got any idea what you’re doin’ to me, baby?” she asks slowly.
You don’t even get the opportunity to answer before her teeth catch the edge of your panties lightly, tugging just enough to make you gasp. And then she lets it snap back into place with a soft, playful grin. She glances up at you, eyes dark and blazing, blonde hair falling into her face as she leans closer again. The way you look back at her—pupils wide, lips parted, cheeks flushed—spurs her on.
Her lips hover just above the lace, and she kisses you there, slow and careful, her mouth pressing over the thin barrier like she can’t stand not to be closer. “So pretty,” she murmurs against you, her fingers brushing over the lace now, testing the material as her tongue flicks out once more, tasting you even through the fabric.
Her big hands slide from your waist to your thighs, spreading them just enough to give her room to work. Her teeth catch the edge of the waistband, tugging gently, and she groans low in her throat as the fabric gives way slightly under her pull.
“Fuck,” Paige mutters, and it’s muffled as she grips the lace between her teeth. She pauses just long enough for you to whimper, “Paige,” before she tugs again, this time pulling the panties down your hips with deliberate slowness.
She moves inch by inch, her teeth grading the lace lower, and she’s completely transfixed. The garters make her work for it, the straps pulling taut against the tension, but she doesn’t mind—if anything, it drives her wilder. Her lips slide along your skin as she works, kissing the sensitive spots where the panties leave a faint imprint.
As she reaches your thighs, Paige shifts, letting the fabric slide past her lips and catching it with her fingers instead. She tugs it the rest of the way down with her teeth again, dragging it along the curve of your legs, her mouth brushing your inner thighs as she goes.
When the panties finally slip off completely, Paige lets them drop from her teeth to the floor, her breath shallow as she grips your thighs, holding them apart. Her eyes rake over every inch of you—the way your face has gone bright pink in a flush, the way your tits peek from the opened lingerie top, the way your cunt is absolutely glistening for her.
She licks her lips slowly, the corner of her mouth curving into a smirk as her gaze flicks back up to your face. “Shit, mama,” she says lowly. “Look at you. Fuckin’ dripping for me.”
Paige doesn’t waste any more time. She slides down on her elbows, lowering herself between your legs, her mouth attaching to your clit with an intensity that makes you cry out. She sucks and licks with fervor, her tongue working you over with a skill that leaves both of your lungs aching, Paige’s face buried so deep in your folds she has to fight for air. The sensation is overwhelming, a delicious mix of pleasure and desperation that has you writhing beneath her, hips bucking.
“Babe… mmm, shit,” you whimper, voice trembling as you reach down to grasp at the sheets, knuckles white with the effort to hold on. You can barely keep your eyes open, pleasure so intense it’s nearly blinding. “Please, fuck, don’t stop.”
Paige has no intentions of stopping. She moans softly against your pussy, the vibrations sending shockwaves through your body. Her hands grip your thighs, holding you in place firmly as she devours you like a woman starved. Her tongue moves expertly, flicking and swirling across your clit before laying it flat, shaking her head from side to side messily, driving you closer and closer to the edge.
“Fuck, ma, you taste so good,” Paige groans, pulling away just long enough to let a glob of her spit land on your cunt. She leans back in, lapping it up, eyes rolling into the back of her head. “Could eat you out all night, baby…”
Your back arches off the bed at Paige’s words, causing the lingerie top to slide down your shoulders a little more. Your hips buck involuntarily as you chase the pleasure Paige gives you, one of your hands coming up to knead your own tit, mouth dropping open at the way Paige’s tongue slides along your wetness effortlessly. You’re desperate, every nerve ending in your body tingling with need. “Paige, baby, ‘M so close,” you choke out.
Paige only intensifies her efforts, her tongue flicking against your clit faster, her mouth working you over with an urgency that has you teetering on the edge. She’s relentless, giving you exactly what you need, pushing you closer and closer until you’re trembling, your thighs quivering around her head.
Just when you think you can’t take anymore, Paige pulls back slightly, her mouth leaving your clit. You let out a desperate whine at the loss, body screaming for more, but Paige is already moving. She slides two fingers inside you without warning, thrusting them in deep, hard, and fast. The sudden intrusion makes you gasp, hands flying to Paige’s shoulders as you cling to her, body trembling with the force of Paige’s thrusts.
“Mmm, mama,” the blonde breathes out lowly as she pumps her fingers into your cunt with a brutal pace, the slick sound of her digits moving in and out echoing in the otherwise quiet hotel room. “So fucking tight, so wet for me. Shit, baby.”
She glances up, gaze on you as your head falls back against the pillows, your eyes squeezing shut as you let out a strangled moan, hips moving to meet Paige’s thrusts. She feels a rush of wetness flood her own boxers and picks up the pace even more, the pleasure becoming overwhelming for you, a white-hot fire that consumes you from the inside you. “Paige, oh my God… holy shit…”
Paige leans in close, biting lightly at your inner thigh as she whispers, “Think you can take three, baby?”
She watches as your eyes fly open at the question, brows furrowing as you nod frantically. “Yes. Yeah, do it,” you force out breathlessly. “Please, P.”
Paige smirks at your reaction, but doesn’t need to be told twice. She pulls her fingers out briefly, adding a third finger before thrusting back inside, her movements deliberate and rough, stretching you out. Your hips buck up to meet Paige hand, chasing the pleasure. Paige scissors her fingers inside you, making you choke a little on your own whimper, nails digging into her skin, gripping the strap of her sports bra.
“Such a—God, you’re such a fuckin’ slut,” Paige groans, eyes locked onto your face, watching every single expression of pleasure that crosses your features. “Wearing that lingerie, knowing I’d lose my goddamn mind. Shit.”
Your entire body is one fire, senses overwhelmed by the combination of the relentless pace of Paige’s thrusts and the dirtiness that coats her words. You can feel every inch of Paige’s fingers inside you, can feel the way they stretch you, the way they hit that perfect spongy spot deep inside that makes you see stars. “Baby, you’re gonna make me cum. God, I’m—” You cut yourself off with a loud moan.
Paige leans forward, her mouth finding your clit again, tongue swirling slick circles over the sensitive nub as she continues to thrust her long fingers in and out, faster and harder, pushing you to the brink. “Shit, ma, do it,” she urges roughly, humming against you as she laps at your pussy. “Cum for me. Cum all fucking over me, mama.”
That’s all you need to hear. With a strangled cry, your entire body tenses, back arching off the bed as you come hard, walls clenching around Paige’s fingers, gushing against her face. The pleasure is blinding, overwhelming, and you can’t do anything but ride it out, body trembling uncontrollably as wave after wave of ecstasy crashes over you.
Paige keeps thrusting her fingers, lapping at your wetness lazily, riding out your orgasm with you. She prolongs the pleasure until you’re nothing but a quivering, panting mess beneath her. When your body finally goes limp, Paige slowly withdraws her fingers, leaning down to press a kiss to your trembling thighs.
And then she starts crawling back up your body, her lips trailing over the lingering marks she’d left along her descent. Your eyes meet, a shared intensity overtaking the laziness you were just feeling, Paige’s lips finding you’re once more in a searing, desperate kiss. It’s messy and heated, tongues tangling, hands grasping and pulling at each other. You can taste yourself on Paige’s lips and it only makes you kiss her harder.
You let Paige flip your positions with her strength, your thighs now straddling Paige’s waist. She groans a little against your mouth as her hands find your bare ass, fingers digging into the skin and kneading it, your bodies pressing together.
“Ma,” Paige breathes out when you pull away slightly, sliding her sports bra up and over her head. Her hands reach down for her sweatpants and you help her yank them—and her boxers beneath—down in one swift motion. Paige’s hips lift off the bed, and the two of you finally rid of the barrier. You toss the clothing aside without a second thought.
Paige’s lips curl into a smirk as her eyes lock with yours again, pulling you closer with her hands on your ass, bodies flush against each other. “C’mon,” she murmurs thickly.
Your breath hitches at the feel of Paige’s hands on your hips, guiding you to align your cunts together. The sensation is sinful, and you can’t suppress the moan that escapes your lips as you feel the heat and slickness of Paige’s wetness against your own.
“That’s it, mama,” the blonde encourages, sending a shiver down your spine. “Ride me, grind on me. Lemme feel you.”
You don’t need to be told twice. You start moving your hips in slow, careful circles, your slick pussy sliding against Paige’s with every movement. The sensation is overwhelming, and your head falls back as you let yourself get lost in the pleasure, hands gripping Paige’s shoulders for support.
Paige’s eyes are glued to you, tracking every move, every expression. She’s mesmerized by the way your face contorts with pleasure, your mouth falling open slightly as your hips move with increasing urgency. Paige’s hands tighten on your hips, helping to guide your movements, pushing you down harder against her own aching cunt.
“Shit,” Paige groans, blue eyes flitting between your flushed face, the way your tits bounce slightly with every thrust of your hips, and where your pussy grinds against hers. “You look so fuckin’ hot riding me like this.”
You whimper at Paige’s words, pace quickening as the heat between you builds to an almost unbearable level. The friction of your clits rubbing together is enough to make you lose control, unable to hold back the desperate sounds that escape your lips.
“You like that, baby?” Paige rasps, voice dripping with lust as she watches you lose yourself in the pleasure. “You like grinding that pretty pussy against me, yeah?”
Your only response is a choked moan, body trembling as you lean forward, hands sliding up to grip the headboard for support. The new angle allows you to press down even harder against Paige, and it sends shockwaves through both of your bodies.
Paige’s eyes roll back in her head at the increased pressure, her own hips bucking up to meet the roll of yours. She’s completely entranced by the sight of you riding her, chest heaving as she helps you, gripping your ass and pulling you quicker against her.
“Feels so fucking good,” she groans roughly.
You whimper at her words, body moving faster, more desperate, the pleasure coiling tighter and tighter. You’re both so close, bodies trembling with the effort to keep going, to chase the high that you both desperately need.
“Paige,” you gasp, breathless and needy. “I’m almost there.”
Paige’s grip on your ass tightens, fingers digging into your flesh as she urges you on. “That’s it,” she encourages, your folds so slick against hers. “Cum for me again. Need it right fuckin’ now.”
You cry out, your entire body tensing as you reach your peak, hips grinding down hard against Paige as you finish with a shuddering moan. The pleasure washes over you in waves, leaving you trembling and breathless as you ride out your orgasm.
Paige isn’t far behind, the sight of you coming undone above her enough to push her over the edge. Her own orgasm hits her hard, her hips jerking up as she lets out a low, guttural moan, her fingers digging into your ass and hips as she rides it out.
You collapse onto her, your body melting into hers, every muscle in you soft and spent. Her skin is warm beneath yours, slick with the same thin sheen of sweat that glistens on your back. Paige’s chest rises and falls erratically under your cheek, her breath heavy and labored, matching your own. The steady rhythm of her heartbeat pounds faintly against your ear, grounding you.
Her arms come around you almost instinctively, wrapping you in a hold that’s firm yet gentle, one hand splayed across your lower back, the other lazily circling between your shoulder blades. Her fingers drag lightly over your skin, soothing and possessive at once, as though she’s trying to memorize every inch of you. She shifts slightly beneath you, her body fitting against yours with an intimacy that feels effortless, as though this is where you’re meant to be.
For a long moment, neither of you speaks. The room is quiet except for the faint hum of the city outside and the soft, uneven breaths you’re both still trying to catch. Paige’s head tilts back against the pillows, her eyes fluttering shut as she lets the tension drain from her body, your weight on top of her a comfort she never realized she needed so much.
And then, with a low, raspy chuckle that vibrates through her chest, Paige breaks the silence. “Damn.”
The single word, said with so much raw awe and disbelief, makes you laugh. The sound is quiet, breathy, but it shakes through you, your shoulders trembling lightly against her. Paige feels the warmth of your laugh against her neck, and a lazy smile spreads across her face, her lips curving up in a way that makes her look soft, completely undone.
Her hand moves from your back, trailing slowly upward, the tips of her fingers grazing your spine before they find your jaw. She cradles it gently, guiding your face upward so your eyes meet hers. There’s something so special in the way she looks at you—like you’re the only thing that exists in her world right now. Her thumb brushes over your cheek, and then she’s leaning in, her lips finding yours in a kiss that’s slow and lingering, deep and unhurried.
She hums softly into it, the sound vibrating against your mouth, and when she pulls back just enough to speak, her voice is low and rough. “Did so perfect for me,” she murmurs, her eyes scanning your face as if committing it to memory.
Your lips curve into a small, sleepy smile, and you let your head rest against her shoulder once more. “I love you,” you whisper, your voice soft but sure.
Paige’s arms tighten around you in response, her fingers brushing lightly over the curve of your shoulder. She doesn’t say it back immediately, but the way she holds you—the way her lips press a gentle kiss to your temple—says it louder than words ever could.
The two of you stay like that for a while, wrapped up in each other, the weight of the moment settling around you like a warm, comforting blanket. Paige’s breathing steadies, her chest rising and falling beneath you in a rhythm that feels calming, almost hypnotic. When she finally moves, it’s only to reach for the nightstand, her fingers curling around the bottle of wine that’s been sitting there, untouched until now.
She pours herself a glass first, then grabs yours, her hand steady as she offers it. “Here,” she says softly, her voice still husky.
You take the glass from her with a small smile, your fingers brushing hers, and Paige feels that familiar spark, that electric current that always seems to buzz between you. She watches you as you take a sip, the way your lips curl around the rim of the glass, the way your eyes meet hers over the edge of it.
After a few minutes, Paige sets her empty glass aside and leans over the edge of the bed, her hand brushing against the discarded lingerie top. She picks it up, holding it up in the dim light, letting it dangle from her fingers as she turns back to you with a lazy grin. “This,” she says, her tone playful but still thick with awe, “was crazy.”
You smile at her, wide and teasing, your head tilting slightly as you reply, “You loved it.”
Paige laughs softly, shaking her head as she leans down to kiss you again, her lips lingering against yours as she murmurs, “Course I did.” Her voice is warm, sincere, and when she pulls back, the grin on her face is so full of love it makes your chest tighten.
The two of you settle back into the bed, the wine forgotten on the nightstand as Paige tucks you against her side, her arm draped over your waist. The city hums softly in the background, but all Paige can hear is the quiet sound of your breathing, the steady rhythm of your heart against hers. And in this moment, with you curled against her, Paige thinks there’s nowhere else in the world she’d rather be.
#paige bueckers#uconn wbb#paige bueckers fic#uconn huskies#wcbb#uconn#wbb#paige bueckers x oc#paige bueckers fluff#paige bueckers smut#paige bueckers x reader#wcbb x reader#wnba#wlw#wlw smut#lgbtq#christmas fic
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Funny stories from set
Here are some funny stories from the making of red dead that I have heard in interviews, with links to the videos if I have been able to find them again, just click the text with the line under.
(25.40) Between the takes of Red Dead Redemption 2, Rob (John) worked construction and one day they were using a Skidloader and he got driven over. He had to reach up and bang on the side of the thing to alert the driver. He ended up with a broken foot and couldn't work for eight months. One of the scenes that someone else ended up doing for him was Rip Van Winkle.
(31.22) The interaction where Charles throws Micah was orignally Charles throwing Bill and was the first thing that Noshir (Charles) filmed on set. With a mo-cap suit follows this big thing in front of the face that helps capture facial expressions (I think), and Noshir was like "I am going to wreck some shit" after being told that he wasn't allowed to turn his head to avoid his and Steve's (Bill) equipment crashing together and after being told over and over, they did it and the equipment indeed broke. So while standing in a T-pose after the set was done, he was just like "... I am so fired."
(6.45) Mick (Sean) and Roger (Arthur) actually knew one another before working on red dead together. Roger worked at a pub not far from the resturant that Mick worked at where they put plays on on the second floor and Roger would come and do readings. Roger auditioned for a part in a play around the beginning of rdr2, and he got the part however he had to cancel due to another bigger job he had gotten. And then Mick got the role of Sean and he figured it all out.
(36.40) Gabriel (Javier) started a rumor that the director was his dad, his stepdad. A lot of the new people on set would come up and be like "I feel like he doesn't like me" and Gabriel would be like "Oh don't worry that is just my dad, he likes you don't worry."
(41.30) Steve (Bill) and Ben (Dutch) would often stay in the same hotel when they were filming and they had this ritual called "Whiskey Hottop" where they would get in a hottop, pour themselves some whiskey and sit together. Sometimes Rob and Noshir would join as well.
(5.17) Rob and Ben knew one another as well from before the first red dead, as they both worked security at a bar called sky bar in Hollywood.
#rdr2#rdr2 community#red dead redemption 2#arthur morgan#rdr2 arthur#red dead redemption community#red dead redemption two#john marston#red dead fandom#rdr john#steve palmer#noshir dalal#ben davies#rob wiethoff#roger clark#rdr2 sean#sean macguire#rdr2 bill#bill williamson#rdr2 charles#charles smith#rdr2 dutch#dutch van der linde#rdr2 javier#javier escuella#nthspecialll
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An Ailing Heart, A Shimmering Soul
Summary: Another Tarnished invades the Shadow Keep and Messmer takes care of them. But something seems off this time. You comfort him when he is most vulnerable.
Spoilers, per usual, for Elden Ring and Shadow of the Erdtree. Warnings for descriptions of violence and a slight amount of spice wink wonk ;D (I've never wrote anything spicy please go easy on my ass, I'm so down bad)
I had two requests, one from the lovely @asianbutnotjapanese and the other from anonymous, and I thought they'd go so well together! I'll link the posts here and here! Thank you both for the requests! I love writing comfort for this lanky man.
As always, thank you for reading, reblogging, liking, and commenting! It makes my day every single time!
Another Tarnished had invaded the Shadow Keep today. This one made it to Messmer himself. Many others found themselves terribly outmatched by his many knights and guards.
You waited patiently in Messmer’s chamber for him to return victorious, just as he had done a multitude of times before. Fiddling with your hands, you tried to drown out the screams and thudding from the room adjacent to Messmer’s, but your thoughts did little to distract you. Your mind wandered, as it always did in these moments: would he come back from this fight?
You shook your head. Of course he would. He was a mighty demigod with more than his mother’s wishes to fight for now. He had you. It was something he whispered into your hair when you lay huddled against his massive form in his bed. You were drifting on the very edge of sleep when his voice, silky and smooth, cut through the silence.
“I will return to thee, beloved consort. This I shall promise.”
Your heart had flipped in your chest. You knew he meant it and he never went back on his word.
The large door creaking open interrupted the sweet memory. Pushing yourself off the bed, you stepped timidly until Messmer came into view.
Blood adorned his chest like rubies and his eye was glued to the floor. He had left his spear in the previous room.
You hurry towards him. “Are you hurt?” You grab his hands and clutch them tightly.
“Merely scratched and covered in blood that is not my own.” He sounds tired.
Carefully, you lead him over to his ornate washroom. He doesn’t say anything as you pull him behind you like dead weight. Even his serpents stay still as they’re perched on his shoulders. Dropping his hands, you hurry to grab some bath salts he likes and a fluffy towel. You turn the faucet and the tub begins to fill with warm water. Pouring some of the salts in and swirling them around, the room begins to smell sweetly of jasmine and vanilla.
Looking back at your lover, you notice that he watches you tiredly. His eye droops and he doesn’t stand as tall as usual.
“Do you need help taking your armor off?” He merely nods in response, so you get to work.
You stretch your arms up to take off his helmet and he bows his head. You set it on the table behind you and comb your fingers through some of the rebellious strands of red. Carefully raising the cloak he wears, you allow the serpents to wiggle out of it before undoing the clasp and letting it fall to the floor behind him. Moving around him, you work on the various buckles on his armor and before long, it joins his cloak in a bloody, crumpled heap.
“Come, my love,” you call out to him and his eye shimmers in response. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”
You take his hand and gently guide him into the bath, letting him go as slowly as he needs to. Once he settles into the warm water, he lets out a sigh of relief. You tilt his head back and pour water over his hair, just as you have done many times before. It’s become a daily thing to wash his hair and body. He loves the tenderness in every touch you lay upon him.
You begin to massage some of his favorite shampoo into his fiery locks. You take your time ensuring his scalp has been thoroughly washed and thread your fingers through the tips of his hair. He shudders and shivers in pleasure.
You want to ask what’s wrong. He’s come back from fights exhausted and worried, but he’s never looked so dejected. Perhaps the fight was too close for his liking? When you took off his armor minutes earlier, you hadn’t seen any new bruises or wounds on his body, so that couldn’t be it. The Tarnished that came to his Keep enraged him, sure, especially if they had hurt any of his men, but they had never made him like this.
“Messmer?” His eye opens slightly. “What’s bothering you?”
“Whatever dost thou mean?” His voice is dejected and quiet.
“Did something happen during your fight?” You tilt his head back and wash the shampoo from his hair.
“‘Tis nothing. Thou needn’t worry.”
You sigh. “I thought we talked about this, about being open with each other. If something is bothering you, I want to help.”
He reaches for your hand and you gladly give it to him. He turns it over in his hand, seemingly marveling at how small yours is compared to his. He kisses your knuckles and moves your hand so you cup his cheek.
“That Tarnished held the belief that I was keeping thee prisoner here.”
Your mouth hangs open. “Prisoner? My love, no! I’m happy here.”
“They did not thinkest so. Perhaps they imagined themself a protector, like I.”
“Messmer,” you make him look at you. “I stay here because I want to. I stay here because I love you. Okay?”
“I had never felt rage such as that. I lost myself.” He admits.
“I’d be angry too. It’s okay.”
He lets out a shuddering breath and a golden tear streaks its way down his pale cheek. You reach out to brush it away.
“I do not deserve thee, beloved. I am naught but a cursed monster.”
“You are so much more than that. I don’t care if you’re cursed.” You pull away from him and pour a generous amount of conditioner into your hands. You gently apply it to his hair.
“You make me truly happy. I hope you know that.” You whisper those words into his ear.
“I shall try to remember that.”
You wash away the conditioner and wrap your arms around his shoulders, not caring about how the water soaks through your clothes. He grabs one of your hands and holds it. You lay a light kiss on his neck and he shudders again.
“Do you want me to wash your body, my love?” You ask into his hair.
“Please.”
“Okay.” You smile and unwind yourself from him.
You gather some soap and begin to lather it on his shoulders. You take your time and even knead out some of the knots in his back as you go. He lets out small gasps and you can see that his ears are a bright red almost rivaling his hair. You raise his arms from the water and squeeze his arms, feeling his muscles. He shoots you a look and you quickly look away, continuing to wash him as he requested. You tilt his head back, sweetly sweeping your hands across his neck and travel down to his collarbones, giving them the same treatment as the rest of his body.
“I ask thee stop this teasing.” His eye is screwed shut.
“Oh shush. You like this.”
“Perhaps.” You smirk.
Continuing down his body, you lather his chest in soap and delicately make your way to his stomach. He visibly tenses at this and you shoot him a puzzled look.
“Thou’rt cruel indeed. Continuing may force my hand.” He warns you, his eye shimmering a bright gold.
Oh. Oh.
As much as you would love to indulge in him, right now he needs comfort. You nod, face blushing as red as his, and you begin to wash away any remaining bubbles kissing his skin. Grabbing a fluffy towel, you wordlessly hand it to him and he stands. You tear your gaze away from him as he dries off and try to keep your thoughts decent. You go fetch his favorite robe from his chambers and grab his brush from where it sits on his bedside table.
When you return, he’s sitting on the plush chair in front of the large vanity he had made for you. You offer him his robe and turn around, waiting for him to dress himself. He clears his throat and you turn around.
“Would you let me do your hair tonight?”
“If it would make thee happy.”
“Always. I love taking care of you.” That earns you a loving smile.
You begin to brush away any tangles he has, but since you’ve been giving his hair regular maintenance, it’s become easier to manage. The bristles gently scratch against his scalp and he lets out a pleased hum. You have such a lovable demigod.
Once you’ve ensured his hair is soft and smooth, you part his hair down the middle. You can see him watching you in the mirror.
“I think you would look stunning in braids.”
He shakes his head. “Braids are intended for nobility and those with honor.”
“You’re a demigod, my love.”
He opens his mouth to say something but he stops when he sees you standing behind him with your hands on your hips, daring him to refuse you. “There is no sense in arguing with thee, it seems.”
“You are correct.” He rolls his eye. You were so stubborn.
Staring on the left side, you take three small strands and delicately weave them together. His hair is easy to work with and within a few minutes, you have a tiny braid.
You hold out your finished work. “Hold this, please.” He does as you ask, and you almost chuckle at the sight of him concentrating on keeping it pinched between his fingers.
Moving to the right side, you do the exact same thing. Strands of red dance in and out and soon, you have another braid. You admire your work.
You take the first braid from him with a small thank you and carefully lay them down on his head, making them join at the ends. It creates an oval-like shape and emits an air of importance. You grab a small hand-held mirror from the table in front of him and give it to him. He stands and faces away from the vanity, repositioning the tiny mirror so he could see the beautiful, yet simple, job you did. He eye crinkles and he seems to like it.
“Thou hast done a wonderful job. I thank thee, beloved.”
You take the small mirror from him and return it to the vanity table. You gesture for him to sit, which he does without protest.
“Your serpents deserve braids too.” He chuckles and his companions look at you with wide eyes.
You open the drawer of the vanity and pull out two tiny braids made from some fabric. You had been practicing with these so your braids would look perfect.
The serpents come closer and you gently lay the strand of fabric on them. They shake a little at first, then flick their tongues excitedly.
“I think they look handsome, don’t you think, Messmer?”
He throws his head back and laughs. “They look quite ridiculous.” The serpents hiss.
You gently pat them both and they nuzzle into your touch. “Don’t listen to him. You both look wonderful.”
In truth, they did look a little silly, but they seemed proud to wear braids like their master.
“Thou always tends to my ailing soul, beloved.” He kisses the top of your head.
“Proud to serve, my Lord.” He rolls his eye at the use of his title.
He scoops your hands up in his and gazes into your eyes tenderly. “I shall say it now for fear that thou dost not realize: thou art free. Wherever thy soul wishes to roam, thou mayest go. I only request that thou returnest to me safe.”
You shake your head. This man. You lean up on your tiptoes and he bridges the gap, placing a loving kiss on your lips. There is no rush, no fight for dominance, just the both of you existing in the same space. Your hearts swell in admiration for one another.
There is nowhere else you’d rather be.
#messmer the impaler#messmer x reader#messmer x tarnished#messmer the impaler x reader#elden ring x reader#some spice this time oooo#i love this guy#and his snakes#this is peak male physique
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Behind the Scenes | V.
summary: Being Vox’s girlfriend requires some patience after twelve hour work days.
pairing: Vox x fem!reader
includes: Vox and Velvette bullying one another, VALENTINO BEING A MENACE, mentions of Angel’s job, drinking, fluff, yelling, Vox being a baby, cursing, implications of being a prostitute, suggestiveness, both of them being teases (that’s it, let me know if i missed any!)
a/n: i think writing hazbin fics is my stress outlet 😭
You were Vox’s. And Vox was yours. Every demon and sinner in Pride Ring knew due to Vox taking time out of his busy work day to shower you with compliments in every press interview or host show when you were brought up. Especially when Vox would be the first one to find you after you finished modeling for Velvette’s show, making sure the paparazzi had photos of him praising you with kisses and soft touches.
Of course, you reciprocated every moment… In the public eye. Behind the cameras and screens, Vox was very much loving. But he did work for almost twelve hours each day, which required patience from you whenever he came home to you in a sour mood.
“Do you need me for anything else, Vel?” You glance back at your phone as you pour red wine into your glass.
“No,” She scribbled down measurement adjustments for another model’s design, looking back up at her screen after hearing an electrical shock from your side of the phone. “But do tell your boy toy that you have a dress rehearsal early tomorrow morning, and that you have to be there on time.”
Vox wrapped his arm around your waist, glaring at the young overlord through your phone. “Fuck off, Velvette.”
You feel him resting his head against your shoulder as he presses soft kisses on your neck, your dead heart fluttering. “I’ll be there on time.”
“Good.” She rolled her eyes at your boyfriend’s actions before ending the call.
“What’s your damage today, handsome?” You ask before sipping on your drink, red lipstick staining the clear glass. You watch as he mutters something incoherent, static emitting from his hat. “Vox, talk to me.”
“That bitch Carmilla won’t meet up, and it’s been several days since our last update on Vox technology.” He sighs as he moves around you, his voice crackling with electricity. “Shareholders have been up my fucking ass all morning about it— Valentino keeps trying to get me to watch his stupid porn feels featuring Angel.”
He removes his suit jacket as he complains, walking toward the large living space including a minibar. Vox pulls at his tie and reaches for the whiskey underneath, “Now Velvette wants to be an ass and complain about me wanting to spend time with you—“
“My love,” You hand him a glass from the cabinets, letting your hand linger on his for a bit. “Vel’s my boss, and I’m her best model. She needs me for these rehearsals.”
“You’re really taking her side?” He tilts back his head and downs the drink in one go, pouring another.
You roll your eyes at his childish behavior, “I’m not taking sides, I’m pointing out a fact.” You sit on the stool by the bar, letting him slot himself between your legs. “If anything, I’m listening to you describing your day.”
“Mm.” He let one hand come down and rest on your hip, rubbing soft circles. “Tell me about your day.”
“Boring, tiring. Pretty much the same every day.” You grab his wrist to ensure he doesn’t go any lower or any higher. “According to your assistant, I do have a lot of things planned tomorrow. So that should be exhausting.”
Vox linked your hands together, “Sounds stressful.”
“Not as bad as yours every day.” You press a kiss on his palm. “I was gonna watch a movie while waiting for you, but now that you’re here—“ You shift your wine glass in your hand as he puts his own glass down, letting him trail his hands to your waist. “Want to join me?”
“Of course.” He presses a chaste kiss to your lips before trailing after you. “What movie are we watching?”
“Whatever the first thing I find.” You let Vox sit on the couch before doing the same, swinging your legs over his lap. “You need a new rotation on Voxflix, I’ve watched almost everything.”
“I’ll get on that.” He mumbled as he ran his hand up and down your leg, occasionally squeezing.
You hum and shift your gaze to the television, scrolling through the different movies. “How do we feel about—“
A ringtone filled the air, both of you freezing at the noise.
“Vox—“
“Give me a second.” He let you pull your legs away and pulled the ringing from his screen to his phone, camera-ready voice leaving his mouth.
You sigh but find a movie worth watching, pulling your knees up. Around halfway through, you decided that the movie was meretricious, heavily judging the poorly made movie more than the other ones you’ve watched. You typed your review on your phone, giving the movie two stars before—
“—THEN GET SOME LOW LIFE SINNER TO DO YOUR FUCKING JOB FOR YOU!” You heard Vox scream from the kitchen, making you wince for the poor soul on the other end. “AND IF YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE SHIT I GIVE YOU, JUST KNOW I HAVE YOUR FUCKING SOUL IN CONTRACT!”
You pause the movie and get up, taking slow steps to your hotheaded boyfriend. He shuffled across the kitchen, walking back and forth as his fans kicked on. His white shirt was unbuttoned and his sleeves were rolled up like he was going to commit a crime.
“YOU LITTLE PIECE OF—“
“Vox,” You come up from behind and wrap your arms around his chest, resting your head on his shoulder. “It’s outside of your work hours.”
“Fucking—“ He rubbed his temple as he heard the sinner go silent on the other line. Vox took one hand and laced it with yours, “You’re lucky my wife is generous you ungrateful fuck.” He ended the call before muttering more curses, turning you in his arms so you were facing his front.
You let your hands move up to his shoulders, massaging the heavy tension in them. “Am I your wife now? Is that what you’ve been telling those sinners?”
“Maybe.” He let out a loud groan from the sensation, fans still running. “The fucking bitch in accounting is—“
“You’re not working right now, stop.” You give him a pointed look. “I need you to relax.”
Vox wrapped his arms around your waist, walking you backward toward the living area once more. “God, I’m in love with you.”
“I love you too.” You chuckle as he peppers kisses on your face. You let out a noise of surprise when he pulls you into his lap, hands gripping his shoulders for support. “Vox!”
“Yes?” He pressed kisses to your exposed collarbone.
You sigh in content but grab the corners of his screen, giving him a cheeky grin. “Tomorrow, my love. Velvette will murder the both of us if I show up late with bruises.”
“I’ll pay her to let you have a day off tomorrow.” He slipped his hand up your shirt, sharp claws bringing chills to your skin.
“So now you’re paying to be with me?” You raise a brow, stifling a laugh when he stops all movements. “Am I some kind of—“
“Of course not! Do not finish that sentence.” He pushed you down on the couch, covering your mouth. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
You laugh at how protective he is over you from himself. “I know you didn’t mean it like that, I was kidding.”
Vox dropped his head down to your shoulder, “You’re such a tease.”
“I’m the best.” You squeeze his bicep. “But seriously, Vel will have our heads strung outside the tower.”
“Whatever.” He flipped you both over, letting you rest your head on his chest. “I’ll have you all to myself this weekend.”
You hum, pressing a kiss on the corner of his screen. “I’m sure you do, handsome.”
“My love, I will cancel all your plans this weekend if you tell me I can’t have you.” Vox traces his finger down your spine. “Don’t tell me you have any.”
“I don’t…” You turn your head as he runs his claws through your hair. You feel yourself warm as he wraps a blanket over the both of you, flicking the television to play with a snap of his fingers.
“What do we rate the movie today?” He played with the ends of your hair, face pulling a grimace at the movie’s corny script.
“Two stars.” You mumble as your gaze shifts to the television. As the television fades to black in an awkward transition, you see Vox staring at you rather than the screen. “What are you looking at, weirdo?”
“My beautiful girlfriend.” He squeezed your hip. “Who I love very much.”
You let a small laugh slip through your lips, grinning brightly at his words. “I love you very much too, weirdo.”
©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms
#august’s works 🫧#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#vox hazbin hotel#vox fanfiction#vox imagine#vox the tv demon#vox x reader#hazbin vox#vox smut#vox#hazbin hotel self insert#hazbin hotel angst#hazbin hotel imagine#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel fandom#hazbin hotel writing#vox tech#vox angst#vox fluff#vox headcanons#vox hazbin x reader#vox x you#vox x y/n#christian borle#hazbin hotel reader insert#hazbin hotel the vees#hazbin hotel insert#hazbin hotel oneshots
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heartbeat conquest — day 0.
SYNOPSIS. you’re sucked into a reverse harem otome game, and there’s only one goal— say the right things to conquer as many pretty boys as you can. PAIRINGS. tomorrow x together x reader. TAGS. social media! au, modern fantasy, reverse harem (of fucking course), romance, humor, a whole bunch of weird dynamics maybe HUAHAHAHAHAHHAAH. inspired by the manhwa with the same title, “heartbeat conquest.”
it's pink.
no, literally. it’s all pink. one moment, you see the headlights of a van coming straight at you. the next moment, you open your eyes and see nothing but pink. pink floor. pink ceiling. pink walls (if there even are walls. you’ve been walking around for what seems like ages but you’re yet to bump into one).
you never thought that the afterlife was gonna be so bubblegum-y and barren.
but then again, you never expected that you’d be bringing your phone to the afterlife, either.
ding!
now, what in the otome isekai bullshit is this crap?
seriously, what the hell? is this actually real? you stare at your phone, eyes narrowed in confusion and suspicion as the notifications keep pouring in— the same text over and over again prompting you to unlock, to start whatever this thing meant by conquest.
this really must be some weird post-death fever dream (can you dream when you’re dead?) but whatever mindfuckery this is, there’s one thing that’s clear to you.
if unlocking meant getting out of this pink-stained hell, might as well give it a damned shot.
your thumb presses the screen. you swipe up.
ding!
all your senses are swallowed by that dreaded shade of sickly sweet, bubblegum pink—
ding! ding! ding!
— and next thing you know, you’re now in an unfamiliar room, pink skies leaking through the sheer curtained window, trinkets strewn about the lived-in bedroom—
ding!
—with five new messages on your phone.
“—the natural talent to be loved and adored by all.”
ding! ding! ding! ding! ding!
how do you start your conquest?
NOTE. i have no idea what the fuck this is going to be, but let’s all have a blast anyway!!!
this is a choose your own adventure. click on the link above and answer the form to progress with the story. you’re the MC of this world who had just been sucked into wherever the fuck this is and have no idea who these five mystery men are, so just to your best in responding with the context that you currently have (none). after this one, more context will be provided, i promise BWAHAH.
honestly the only way to win this and get a “good ending” is to get a correct read of the boys’ characters and give the right responses— and if you’ve read a bunch of my stuff, you probably have a good idea on how i like my male leads HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHA.
i will synthesize all submitted replies and move forward from there. the form will close once i get enough responses. this is just a little experiment that i’m doing and i have no idea how this gonna turn out HHAHHAHAHAHAHAH still, i hope you guys will participate!
DAY 0 | DAY 1
heartbeat conquest. © hannie-dul-set, 2024.
#heartbeat conquest#tomorrow x together x reader#txt x reader#txt fanfic#txt scenarios#choi yeonjun x reader#choi soobin x reader#choi beomgyu x reader#hueningkai x reader#kang taehyun x reader#yeonjun x reader#soobin x reader#beomgyu x reader#taehyun x reader#huening x rader
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Why does this scream second chance romance?
reqs are open!
at first sight
hayato suo; 6,284 words; fluff, slight angst, fem!reader, no "y/n", passing mentions of divorce, childhood friends to lovers, hurt/comfort (a little), the slowest of burns, suo is a simp, introspection, more plot than not
summary: and isn’t it strange, that a person doesn’t have to be dead to serve a haunting, how there only need be absence and sorrow and the utterly world-ending ache of what used to be?
a/n: this was not supposed to be this long or this self-indulgent but welp.
He sees you sometimes in his dreams, in the spaces right before he falls asleep — that sweet, weightless, liminal space where anything and everything is possible, even probable. He sees the shape of your laughter, feels the weight of your breath, can almost taste the sugarplum sweetness of your smile. He’d lose himself, then, in the firefly lights of your eyes.
On those nights, he wakes up with a scream curdling up the back of his throat like soured milk.
Because no matter how hard he tries to hold onto the good memories, the ones bathed in the precious, pale gold of summer sun, truth always slips through like a sharp, silver knife. Cold. Ruthless. Unrelenting.
“— so, I know we don’t know each other very well but… you’ve done so much for our shop and my grandma is so grateful and… it always makes me so happy to see you come by —”
The girl in front of him is pretty, in the delicate, unassuming way that all young girls might be called pretty. She is dark, pin-straight hair and thin-rimmed glasses. Suo can tell that she’s put on a sparkly sheen of lip-gloss just for this occasion. Her cheeks are tinted sunset pink; there’s a letter in her hands.
“Thank you,” he says, dipping his head, his hand linked behind his back, his expression schooled into one of polite affectation, the most gentle rejection. He listens to her run herself out, babbling on about visits and admiration and the shape of him outside the shop window, how her heart would skip a beat. He finds himself, wistfully, thinking about the shape of you — when you were small enough to wiggle under the fence in his backyard, dirt caked under your nails, your hair always chopped short, one of your front teeth missing as you tossed pebbles at his windows.
“I’m… sorry,” he says, finally, when the girl presses the letter into the center of his chest, bowing low enough for her long silky hair to cover her face. He slowly folds his fingers over the letter, giving her hand a squeeze as he presses it back towards her.
“B-but…” she looks up; there are tears in her eyes, “why…?”
“I suppose,” he says, voice light and conversational, almost as if he were remarking on the weather, “I’m just not the dating type.”
The girl mumbles something before sniffling and wiping at her eyes. She is, Suo admits, not a very pretty crier. But then again, he thinks, most people aren’t. She nods again, as if to herself, clutching her unopened letter to her chest before dropping into another deep bow and dashing off. Suo can hear the clipped echoes of her sobs as she races down the near empty streets, and he sighs.
He turns on his heels and makes his slow way back to his own house, the place small and empty, but clean. The single wooden shelf is lined with books, alphabetized. His futon is folded neatly in his closet. He goes through the motions of making tea, pouring the boiling water over the dried leaves, watching them unfurl. He breathes in deep and thinks of you —
You were the one who first taught him how to brew tea, your small hands not yet big enough to hold a teapot proper, but whatever you’d lacked in skill, you made up for in determination. He’d always admired that about you, the sheer recklessness of your nature that bled, somehow, into courage in his young mind.
“Careful! It’s hot…” he’d warned, reaching out to catch your wrist, but too late, the water had already spilled a little and you wince, but you don’t let go, your arms quaking as you set the scalding teapot down, biting down on your lips to keep from crying out.
“I know it’s hot! But you gotta use hot water if you wanna make good tea!”
And there, through the misty haze of steam rising from the pair of cups, sitting across the table from you, Suo thinks you’re the most beautiful creature in the entire world.
He loses you, he reflects, the same way he loses most things in his life — accidentally and to the well-tempered beat of fate from which no one can escape. One minute you were right there in front of him and the next, well…
“Moving…?” he says the word as if he’d never heard it before. You sigh, nodding, staring listlessly into empty space, your knees curled up and pressed into your chest, your chin propped on your crossed arms.
Suo blinks, “But… where are you moving to?”
You shrug, “Tokyo, I think,” you say the word with a soft resignation only found in those who have seen and lost, seen and lost again. Suo thinks he understands; looking back, he’s not sure he did just then.
“Because of… your dad’s work?”
“Yeah. He says that if his company does well there, we’d be ‘set for life’ — whatever that means,” you say, picking at a bit of invisible lint on your sleeves.
“But… what about your mom? And the teashop?”
You purse your lips, mulling over your words as if you’ve got a sour cherry pit caught beneath your tongue.
“She says… she can’t leave it. So… she’s staying here.”
“Oh,” Suo says, sitting back against his bedroom wall. Even back then, he was smart enough to understand the implications.
You nod.
Judging by the look on your face, so are you.
“So… when…” he can’t really make out the words; there’s something stuck in his throat that feels oddly like an entire handful of sand.
“End of the month,” you say, finally looking up at him to catch his eyes. And there, he sees the insurmountable sadness, the longing he’d sometimes catch a glimpse of in the slanted summer light. As if you’re waiting for him to do something, to say something. He could never figure out what exactly it was you’d wanted him to do. To say.
Stay.
He’d later realize.
Please.
He’d repeat the words to himself in the encroaching dark, lying on his futon, watching the light cast on his walls go from white to gray to gold, and slowly, sinking into cool, hollow blackness.
Don’t go.
He mouths the words until he can almost taste the shape of them on his tongue. He swallows around them like a fistful of sand, flips onto his side, and tries to go to sleep.
You appear before him like a daydream, a near mirage in the summer heat. One second, he’s laughing with Nirei at something Sakura’s said, and the next, he’s standing stock still, staring at the end of the street where he’s sure he’d just seen you —
You look older now, but then so does he, and your hair is longer, but the shape of your laughter, the light of your eyes — he wouldn’t miss those anywhere. Not then, not now, not ever. Even after all these years.
“Suo-san…?” Nirei peers up into his face, tugging on his sleeve.
“Hm? Oh sorry — I just thought —” he glances back at the end of the street. Just a large van and a few young workers, hauling things out from the back.
“Oh, there’s a new teahouse opening in town! That must be them, moving in!” Nirei says, cheerful and oblivious as always.
“What’s a teahouse do, anyway?” Sakura asks, picking at his ear and flicking something off the end of his pinky.
“Uhm… make tea?” Nirei offers.
“Yeah, but don’t we all know how to make — where the hell’s he goin’?”
Suo takes off down the street, whipping passed their usual haunts, the taiyaki shop, the okonomiyaki stand, Pothos cafe, to the corner of the street, just where the sidewalk threatens to curve into some more residential place —
“Oi!” Sakura calls after him but he doesn’t listen.
There — that sound. Sugarplum and silver bells.
The space is undone, the door propped open with a wooden crate, the young men with the moving company tutting as they grunt and step around Suo to carry more boxes into the space, setting them down along the walls.
“— there’s good, oh no — not that one — that one goes… oh here’s good! Thanks!”
You.
He sees you like something from his wildest daydreams, the shape of you in smoke and stardust — the light twisting and twining around you as if it knows, treating you differently than it might all the other people and objects in the room, focusing around you to paint you in richer tones, in brighter lights and deeper shadows. The air seems to gather around you like a held breath.
And for a moment, Suo himself forgets quite completely that he himself might need to breathe as well.
You turn your eyes on him and the world seems to shift focus like a camera lens shifting zoom. Everything blurs, sound slows, drags, distorts. The room around you fades until it’s nothing more than a suggestion of shapes and space.
Suo sucks in a breath.
“Sorry — we’re not quite open y…”
Your voice trails off, and vaguely, Suo thinks that you sound different than you did before. But there’s still the same lovely cadence to your words, the rounded edges, the crispness of your diction, the sheer weight of your conviction in the things you say and how you might will them into truth.
“It’s… been a while,” he says. His own voice is weak, wavering, dry and scratchy and sounding nothing like himself but he sees the moment you recognize him, wholly and completely.
“H-Hayato-kun!”
“Oi, Suo — who’re you —” Sakura rams a shoulder into him at this exact moment, Nirei pattering close behind, trying to hold him back. Sakura blinks at you, his head flicking between you and Suo as if watching an invisible tennis match. And then, some understand seeps into the depths of his eyes and his cheeks go a ruddy shade of pink.
“Uh — sorry, I didn’t — who —” he looks bewildered and awkward all at once.
“We’re Suo-san’s friends — from Boufuurin!” Nirei cuts in, finally succeeding in tugging Sakura to one side and peering around the rather narrow door frame. He bows slightly before jumping half a meter in the air as a mover clears his throat loudly behind the group of boys now clogging the door way.
You jerk out of your reverie and point the mover towards an empty corner before making your way over, your steps steady. It takes everything in Suo’s being not to move, to neither shift forward, to press into your personal space just to make sure you’re really real, or to turn tail and run till he doesn’t have the breath to keep running any more.
He can’t tell which he’d prefer more, but he knows that neither is the best option right now.
So, he forces himself to stand still, to wait for you to come to him.
And you do, drifting over in a cloud of light linen and a flower patterned apron.
“Hi! Long time no see!”
Suo registers faintly that though your hair is longer, but your bangs are still choppy, and the ends of your hair badly cut, as if you’d gotten annoyed one day and tried to do it with kitchen scissors. He bites back a smile at the image. But there are other subtle changes too — the round babyfat on your cheeks slimming out to a sweet, heart-shaped face, the hugeness of your eyes, almost alien-like in your child years, now balanced out by the depths of your features. Your lips are small and plush as an overripe plum — that, at least, hasn’t changed in the slightest.
“Yeah… what… are you doing here?” he asks, still struck dumb by the sight of you here, in Makochi.
You raise an eyebrow and Suo almost feels the motion like a gut-punch, the familiarity of it overriding your older features until he can’t really tell if he’s living in the present or if he’s been suddenly and unwillingly shunted into the past.
You scoff, “Opening a teahouse, duh!”
Nirei laughs and Sakura lets out a snicker that kicks Suo out of his stupor. He clears his throat, having the decency to at least look abashed.
“Sorry, yes — that much is obvious. Is there… anything we can do to help?” he tries to ground himself in the established notions of aiding the citizens of Makochi. At least here, he knows what he has to do. His voice evens out, his smile returns.
You regard him with that same, questioning look before casting your eyes around the room.
“Sure! Plenty to do if you guys have the time —” and then you start pointing to the various tasks they might help with.
Nirei and Sakura jump to, already used to the pattern, with Suo trailing behind them, moving slower than usual, his limbs feeling heavy, as if they’re full of lead. It takes them the better part of the afternoon to help you set up most of the bigger pieces of furniture. And somehow, by the time they’re done, a good chunk of the freshman class is there, chattering and laughing, lounging at the newly built tables.
“Alright! Who wants some tea? Fresh and on the house — consider it payment for a job well-done!” you clap your hands, grinning as the boys all cheer.
Suo keeps quiet, sitting at a corner table with Sakura beside him, Nirei across. It isn’t until Sakura digs his elbow rather painfully into Suo’s ribs that he turns his face towards them, hitching a smile to his face.
“Hm?”
“What’s with you?” Sakura asks, never one to mince words. Across from them, Nirei nibbles on his lips as if debating on whether or not to add on to Sakura’s line of questioning
“What do you mean?” Suo asks, folding his hands carefully on the table. He’s not fooling anyone; he knows, but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t at least try.
Finally, impulse wins out and Nirei blurts out —
“You’ve been staring at that girl all afternoon and — and I’ve never seen you look at anyone like that before. And you’re the one that gets the most confessions out of anyone in our year, so it figures that if this girl c-can capture your attention like this, she must be someone really special.”
He finishes slightly out of breath, before ducking behind his little notebook, even though he’s holding it upside-down.
Suo lets out a helpless laugh.
“I didn’t know you were keeping track of how many confessions all of us got — that statistic seems irrelevant to our fighting abilities, no?”
“Quit tryna change the subject,” Sakura cuts in, loudly.
Suo sighs, nodding, “I was getting there. We —” he cuts off, clearing his throat as he feels his entire body catch on the edge of the confession.
He takes a deep breath and starts again, this time, pressing a slight smile between his lips, taking on a tone as if telling a story about someone else.
“We were neighbors growing up.”
Nirei blinks, “Is… that it?”
Suo’s smile goes a bit stiff and plastic, “More or less.”
“Liar,” Sakura folds his arms, frowning as he stares Suo down. His cheeks are still pink, but there’s a determined glint behind his eyes that never bodes well.
“Ah… well,” Suo weighs his options, but then lilts his head and shrugs, “you caught me — we were a bit more than just neighbors… more like childhood friends.”
Sakura narrows his eyes but doesn’t push. Suo looks down at his hands, laced carefully on the wooden table before he speaks again.
“We… spent a lot of time together and… her mother owned a teashop like this one.”
“Oh! A family business!” Nirei says.
Suo opens his mouth to correct him but your voice cuts him off.
“You still have them!”
A finger slips along the long tassels of his earring and Suo nearly jerks away, casting his eyes up to find you, a familiar teapot in your now steady hands, your eyes somehow bright and dark at the same time as you look down at him.
“Oh… yes, I —” again, he feels his throat catch, “of course I did. You were the one who made them for me.”
You let out a light laugh, setting a few teacups down at their table and prepping their tea.
“You didn’t have to — I’m surprised they held up after all these years. You know I bought the red beads at the craft store right?”
“Yeah, you… you used your New Years money. I remember…”
“And you helped me pick out the tassels from the lady who sells lucky knots at the market!” you say all this as if it weren’t one of his most precious memories, as if he hadn’t gone to great lengths to make sure the earrings you gave him (one of the only things you’d ever given them, other than perhaps a broken heart) never came to any harm.
Across from him, he can see Nirei putting the pieces together. Next to him, Sakura seems stunned still by the same revelation.
“If I’d know you’d like them so much, I would’ve made you a few more pairs. At least that way, you can try to match them with your clothes,” you grin, leaning down to seep their tea. Suo watches as the hot water washes over the dried leaves, rehydrating them till they each unfurl into their own shape. A deep, floral fragrance fills the air and he feels his stomach both twist and settle in the same motion.
“Jasmine green,” he says.
“Mhm. Your favorite. It’s a little basic but I love it too.” You shoot him a surreptitious wink. Then, you pause, “Ah — but it might not be your favorite anymore, I guess —”
“It still is,” Suo says before you can second guess yourself.
The smile that re-alights your face is nearly blinding in it’s brilliance.
“Anyway, I’ll leave the water here for you guys, yeah?” you set the teapot down next to Suo’s elbow, flash them all one more smile before twirling around and going to serve the next table.
It isn’t until much after dark that everyone leaves and Suo, having made up some vague excuse to linger, finally has you to himself. You hum as you flit from table to table, wiping them down and pushing in the chairs. Suo watches you for a solid minute before moving to help.
“Thanks,” you say, as he helps you push in the last chair and you wipe a forearm across your forehead with a long breath, “phew! Ma really made it look easy back in the day, but this is hard work! And we’re not even officially opened yet!”
“We’ll come by to help whenever we can,” Suo says, the response automatic.
You nod, folding the tablecloth neatly into a square and setting it on the counter.
The silence thickens around you, swirling and charged. Suo grasps for something to say, anything to say. He wishes you’d do something — turn on a light, hum another song, say something strange and outlandish, punch him, perhaps.
You do none of those things. Instead, you wipe your hands on your apron and turn to look at him, your eyes huge in the darkness.
“I’ve missed you.”
It nearly knocks him from his feet. The quiet force of your words, the raw-edged honesty behind them. The way your voice doesn’t waver. The way you say them not like an accusation but an admittance. He thinks he really would’ve preferred if you punched him instead.
“Yeah,” he says, feeling breathless, heat cresting up his chest, and suddenly, he’s thankful for the darkness within the not-yet-opened teashop.
“I’ve missed you too.”
He feels hollowed out by the confession, as if just speaking the words had carved him clean, so clean that the words echo through him, reverberating through his bones till he feels it down to his marrow. He hadn’t known that missing a person could feel like this, or that the word could mean so much until he’d said it out loud.
Missing. The lack thereof. A nothing where there used to be something.
It is a wrongness in the matrix, a hole, an abnormality.
It’s as if he’d been sleeping on the mattress from the Princess and the Pea ever since the day you’d left, a subtle incorrectness that permeated every single moment of every day, so obvious in it’s presence that it had folded back into itself and become something.
That the lack of you was a presence in and of itself, a living ghost that had loomed over him, slinked behind his shadow, hovered over his shoulder until —
He reaches out to touch you, fingers skimming against the skin of your cheek.
You lean into his touch, the motion slight but he catches it almost immediately, and the force of it is the catalyst that propels him forward. He tugs you into his chest and holds you there, burying his face in your hair.
“I — I’ve missed you…” he says again, and you nod, fingers crumpling in his school uniform as you press your forehead into his chest.
“Y-you’re so much taller than before — it’s not fair,” you say, your voice muffled by his shirt. He laughs, ruffling your hair for a second before his fingers so soft and he’s running them through from root to end.
“If I had a sister, I’d tell her to keep her hair long, so I could braid it,” he’d once told you when the two of you were barely in elementary school. You’d tugged at the ends of your chopped short hair and frowned.
“Ugh — I could never grow my hair out long. It’ll just get in the way!”
“It’s longer,” he says now, tugging at the ends even as he takes half a step away, releasing you from his embrace. You glance down at the uneven bits, crinkling your nose in distaste.
“I — I tried to grow it out but… I kept getting annoyed.”
“Yeah, I thought so but… I’ve always liked your hair short.”
“You have?”
“Yeah —”
I’ve always loved everything about you.
He swallows, “Short hair… just fits you.”
You stare up at him for a second longer before nodding, your eyes flickering away.
“Yeah. Guess it does, huh.”
Something clunks in Suo’s chest.
You turn away and he has to physically beat down the panic rising in his chest.
“W-where do you live now? I’ll walk you back. It’s not safe to walk around alone in the dark,” the words tumble from him like a bag of spilled marbles, scattering across the hardwood floors.
You turn back to regard him with a curious look.
“I — I live above the teahouse. So…” you shoot him a lopsided grin, a finger pointed up towards the ceiling of the teahouse.
“Oh. Right.” Suo blinks, watching you watching him before he notices the flight of stairs behind the open door in the back of the room.
“You wanna walk me to the stairs?” you ask, grin slanting sideways till its positively devilish and Suo feels a shiver kiss it’s way up his spine.
“I mean, it’s dangerous to walk alone in the dark, right?” you tease, before turning and slinking towards the back room door. Suo hesitates for a second before he sighs, shaking his head and following behind you.
He pauses at the foot of the stairs just as you pause on the step right above him. You twist around to face him, and the sudden closeness catches his breath in his lungs. Like this, he can feel the heat of your skin, can smell the shampoo in your hair — the same one you’d used when the pair of you were still kids, apple blossom and aloe.
You cock your head, your faces now on a level, your eyes searching his.
It’s so dark, but even in this lack of light, he can make out every single feature of your face.
“I think I can make it up the stairs by myself,” you say, your voice barely more than a whisper, conspiratorial and low.
Suo lets out a small laugh, nodding, “Good. It wouldn’t be right for a gentleman to leave a lady feeling unsafe at this time of night.”
Your head slowly cocks the other way; he’d almost forgotten that habit of yours, like a sparrow listening for the rustle of leaves or the first breath of autumn wind.
“Since when’ve you been a gentleman?” you ask, still in that soft, whisper-voice, the kind of voice that compels the listener to lean closer, to tip forward until they’re falling into something they don’t even have the name for —
“And… more importantly, since when have I ever been a lady?”
He kisses you then. Or perhaps, you kiss him first. It doesn’t matter — or perhaps it does, or it will. But not now, not in the soft, nebulous darkness that surrounds you, not when your fingers are curling into his hair and his palms are settling at your waist.
And there are no fireworks, but there is light — electricity coursing through his body and yours, neurons firing and firing and firing. A cataclysm of yes and more and finally.
The first time you break apart, Suo is breathless; the second time, he feels punch drunk; by the third, he’s determined that this must be what it’s like to be thoroughly inebriated. His head is spinning, his face is hot, he has to remind himself of where his hands might be — oh, there — one in your hair and the other pressing you to him so hard he’s certain it’ll leave a mark.
The thought pleases him more than it should. Or perhaps it pleases him just as much as it should and always will.
“H-Hayato…"
“Mm — stay — please…” his voice is nearly broken as he drops his had into your shoulder; he takes a shaky breath, “don’t go.”
You let yourself be held, the pair of you propped awkwardly on the first few steps of the stairs, your fingers threading through his hair.
“I’m not going anywhere… this is my house now.”
Suo nods, vaguely aware that there are questions he wants to ask you — how’s your mother? Where’s your father? How are you here, alone, opening this teashop by yourself? Living here, by yourself?
But he will get to those later, tomorrow maybe. Right now, he forces his head up and regards you with hazy, blown-out eyes and kiss-slick lips.
“If I sleep on the floor, can I —”
You laugh, running a thumb along his cheek.
“We’ve shared a bed before and nothing’s happened. You don’t have to sleep on the floor — bed’s big enough for the both of us.”
Suo presses his lips for a second before shaking his head.
“It’s not that. I just… don’t think I could trust myself.”
There’s a hoarse, ragged edge to his voice that has you chewing on the inside of your cheek. He glances up the stairs and offers you a weak smile. You consider him for a second more before nodding.
“Yeah, c’mon. I’ll show you where the futons are.”
Upstairs, your bedroom is silver and alien with moonlight. It seems too bright, too sharp. But you step into it and suddenly, everything is alright again. You both wash up in silence, and you dig up an ancient band t-shirt from somewhere in your closet. He wonders how long you’d been here already — how many days and night he’d spent mere minutes from you.
He lays down in the futon after you slip beneath your sheets. He watches the shape of you as you shift this way and that.
Finally, you say, “Night, Hayato.”
“Sweet dreams,” he says.
And he falls asleep counting the sound of your breaths against the rhythm of his own, thundering heartbeats.
“Y-you what?!”
Sakura’s face is tomato red and Nirei looks just about ready to go into anaphylactic shock. Across the classroom, Kiryuu, who’s obviously been listening in, catches Suo’s eye and gives him a cheeky thumbs up.
Suo smiles, cheery and unabashed.
“I slept over.”
“B-b-but — you — I — she just —” Nirei seems to be fighting against some invisible force inside himself even as Sakura continues to gape.
Suo chuckles, nodding.
“Yeah, she moved here last week — it’s a total coincidence that we met up again. She had no idea that I was even here.”
He thinks back to the quiet moments of the morning, of waking up to find you sitting up in bed, staring out the window, your hair mussed and a little frizzy. He remembers the way the morning light had dappled the soft of your skin, how you’d smiled and asked him how he slept.
“Well. Better than I’ve slept in…” he clears his throat, suddenly self conscious of the gravel there. And here, in the unforgiving light of day, the night before seems miraculous and distant. Had he really held you in the dark like that? Kissed you till you’d said his name like something of a prayer?
Had he really held your hand all the way up the stairs?
You catch his eyes and smile, and like this, looking up at you as the rising sun halos itself around your shape, Suo wonders if he still might be dreaming. Because surely, surely — heaven couldn’t have been so close as this.
“So, what do you want for breakfast?” you ask, swinging your legs out of bed, your pale feet pattering against the fresh tatami floors. Suo is momentarily stunned by the sight of your bare legs, the large shirt you wore to bed now somehow terribly short and insufficient as it brushes by the middle of your thighs.
He swallows and forces himself to look away, to shake his head and focus on the words you’d said.
“Whatever you want to make,” he says, by way of an answer.
You hum as you cook, putting a bowl of rice in the microwave and putting on a pot of water to boil. The kitchen here is smaller than the one up front, in the main body of the teahouse, but it feels more homely, every surface effused with a sort of lived-in quality — clean, but rounded at the edges as if worn down by the love of days and weeks and months.
“How long…” he tries his voice again, only to find it wanting. He lets his words trail off and hopes that you understand.
“Hm? How long have I been here? Just a week. It was weird — my mom had bought this place a while back, and started the renovations, but I’d never had time to visit.”
“And where…” again, his voice trails off, his palms pressing flat to the thin counter, his eyes tracking the shape of you as you flitter through the small kitchen like a bird or maybe just a trick of the light.
“She’s not here,” you say, your movements slowing as you take the boiling water from the stovetop and pour it over some rough tealeaves, letting them seep for a few minutes before straining them out and tossing them into the trash.
“She’s… in Tokyo, finalizing the divorce with Pa.”
“Oh.”
His mind makes several inferences at once, even as he watches you soak the rice in the steaming hot tea and split the ochazuke into two bowls.
“I thought they’d… already done that,” he admit, nodding his thanks as you hand him a bowl and offer him a container of store-bought furikake. He takes it and shakes some over his bowl before handing it back.
“Yeah. Most people did.” You don’t offer up anything more and the both of you eat in silence. He polishes off the entire bowl and feels the heat settle in his stomach like a gap being filled.
“So… will she come after… everything is settled?” he choses his words carefully, peering up at you over the empty dishes. You slurp noisily at your own breakfast before licking your lips.
“Yeah, but who knows how long that’ll take? Might be weeks, might be — years, or something…” you drag the back of a hand across your lips and reaches over to pluck the empty bowl from his hands, dropping everything into the sink to soak.
“C’mon, don’t you have school or something to get ready for?”
“So… she’s here to stay?” Nirei asks, his eyes a bit overbright as Suo relays a version of the story, skirting tactfully around the more tender parts.
“Yeah, as far as I know. I promised we’d come by after school today to help her set up some more — you don’t mind, do you?”
“Nope! Not at all!” Nirei beams, but Sakura’s eyes are narrowed. Suo turns his gaze on Sakura and tilts his head with a questioning smile.
Sakura’s cheeks redden, “It’s just — ah, whatever — never mind!”
And no amount of prodding or teasing could tantalize him into saying more.
Time passes by strangely after that — at times slugging by slow as molasses, at others jumping forward in great leaps and bounds. Suo spends nearly every waking moment when he’s not at school or on patrols with you, sometimes simply sitting in the corner of the teahouse, flipping through a book, watching as you served your growing roster of regular customers, at times helping you catalogue new shipments of tea and organizing them by type, brew time, and temperature.
Sometimes, when the light catches you in just the right way, Suo finds himself arrested by the sight, and it’s times like these when he’d tug you forward, a finger under your chin, his lips gentle on yours till he can taste the tang of your smile.
“I heard you’re quite the lady’s man,” you say, casually one day, brewing a test batch of a new varietal of white tea.
“Oh? And where might you have heard such a thing?” Suo grins, pillowing his chin on the heel of his hand, watching you as he always does.
“Just the baker’s granddaughter — she goes the prep school I do, you know the one in the next neighborhood over?”
“Ah… that.”
Your grin goes lopsided as you carefully blow on the top of your teacup and take a dainty sip.
“You got your hair cut,” he says, smiling as he rakes his eye over the cut of your bob, tickling just beneath your earlobe. You go slightly cross-eyed as you tug a strand down over your forehead before blowing it away again.
“Yeah. Figured it was about time I got a proper haircut.”
“I liked it the way it was before.”
“You did?”
“Sure I did. I’ve always loved everything about you.”
Between you, a single column of steam rises in a slow, lazy spiral from the surface of your half-drunk cup. And like this, Suo thinks you’re still the most beautiful creature he’s ever, ever seen.
Your blush is quick and brilliant. Your eyes cut away; you push your hair behind your ears.
“Don’t changed the subject — so what’s this she said about you not really being one for dating, hm?”
Suo shrugs, “I’m not.”
You quirk an eyebrow.
“Then…” you blink at him, cheeks flushing darker and darker, “what do you call this?”
Suo fixes you with a steady look, and now, his voice doesn’t waver when he speaks to you, because he knows that he’d never let the certainty of you slip away from him again. This time, he knows the words to say — knows without the shadow of a doubt his truth, and yours, too.
“I don’t know what I’d call it but… I know that I’ve never really believed in dating.”
You lick your lips, setting the cup down with a soft clack.
“Then what do you believe in?”
Suo doesn’t miss a beat.
“I suppose… I’ve always just believed in soulmates.”
Your mouth falls open ever so slightly. Suo smiles as he reaches forward to tug the strand of hair free from behind your ear just to run his thumb over the smooth, silken ends.
“And, I’ve always, always believed in love at first sight.”
#house of solis occasum#wind breaker#wind breaker x reader#wind breaker x you#wind breaker fluff#wind breaker fanfic#wind breaker x y/n#x reader#suo hayato#hayato suo#suo hayato x reader#suo hayato x you#suo hayato fluff#suo hayato imagines#wind breaker scenarios#suo x you#floofy floof floof#wow is he my new plot!muse#is it him now instead of zoro bc wtf why was this one so long lmfao#but also no one can convince me that suo isn't just absolutely pathetic to the one he loves okay#NO ONE can convince me otherwise.
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one free pass for the grumpy!logan and overprotective brother!wade plot bunny 🤝🐇
"So," Vanessa hummed, watching you stir pans, "how was the date you went on?"
"He stood me up," you shrug. "I did get some really good gyoza though-"
"Sweetie."
You shrug again. "It's not the first time. And let's face it. It won't be the last. I write romance books. I don't live them."
Vanessa gave you a look but kept her commentary to herself. The last few years had been hard on everyone. You'd thought your big brother was dead right along next to her. You'd been in the thick of it even though you were trying to start college. Still just a kid. And in a lot of ways you were her rock- and a link to Wade when he was gone.
"I don't want to spend my whole life like our mom. Just like Wade doesn't want to be our dad, Nessa." You shake your head like you're banishing a thought and turn off the stove. "Let's fucking eat. I'm starving."
"This looks incredible. I have sex dreams less erotic than this."
"I heard that, Ow," Wade said, clutching his heart.
Vanessa shrugged and poured stroganoff into a bowl before shoving it into his hands, "Go be useful. Y/N did the hard part."
"Logan," you call, "I know you probably don't do wine, I got beer if you want that instead?"
"I uh- thanks," he said, shuffling to the table, offering Trigger his hand to smell when the dog shot him a look. He sniffed it and shot him a distinctly dirty look before walking away to re-glue himself to your side. Good dog, he thought.
"No assigned seating here, Logi-bear," Wade said, taking a seat next to Vanessa as he finished putting portions on plates- leaving Logan nowhere to sit but next to you since he'd put Mary in the other empty spot.
He nodded and pulled out a chair and looked towards the kitchen. He could hear you still rattling around and the sound of a knife slicing through something. And then a clatter "Fuck!"
Wade was out of his seat in a second and in the kitchen, "What'd you do- Holy shit biscuits!"
"It's fine I just-"
"Where d'you keep you towels?" he asked, rifling through the drawers and throwing things around.
"Next to the sink, Christ, it's not that bad-"
When you walk around the corner with Wade's arm around your shoulder, Logan blinked, blood-spattered your shirt and your pants. For "Not that bad" it looked like you might have cut your fucking hand off.
"I'll get some Ice," Vanessa said, standing up, "Logan, keep pressure on that for a second?"
Logan nodded, "Easy bleeder?" he ventured. You weren't phased enough about it for this to be new.
You nod and sigh, letting him look at your hand. "I've done worse," you muse. "He's so fucking dramatic." A thud makes you look away from the wound and Logan wrapped it to press on it carefully. "I swear if they're fucking in my kitchen again-"
"We're not," Vanessa said returning with an icepack, "I dropped the ice cream trying to find the ice."
"And Wade is-"
"Debating on if You'd want the staple gun or just super glue," he answered.
"There's bandages under the sink you degenerate!"
"Ooo, secrets," Wade said, dropping the stuff he was holding and heading towards the bathroom.
"Nessa," you plead.
"I'll go get him," she said rolling her eyes.
Logan exhaled through his nose and adjusted the ice on your hand. "I think you'll live, kid."
"Probably. I can hold this, your dinner is getting cold-"
Logan snorted, "Not a complete animal. Wouldn't be polite to eat while my hostess is bleeding out."
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Hi again!!!! Older brother JJ annon here
So i absolutley LOVE your take on this and ive got stuffs to add >:D
So the Joker finds the alternate universe Damian so JJ just- kills him right?? And then Damians bats come to get him and all that but WJAT IF instead of them going back to their dimension JJ sees these other people he vaguley recognizes and decides "fuck it. Im keeping them ALL."
So he does. And it doesnt matter that most of these guys are older than him, he treats them almost exactly like he does with Damian. (Except for bruce. Junior doesnt know what to do with bruce) JJ doesnt give two shits
And like- all the bats are weirded out because what????? Who is this mini joker??? And then they find out its a version of TIM. So they just...kidnap him back. Its bonus points because they dint have a Tim (anymore [i decided that because angst and yes. {id imagine their tim died from the widdower on Brucequest or smth along those lines but the evidence he collected still got sent back? Who knows. Deff not me}])
So its like a win-win for everyone involved!!! Tim JJ gets the bats back (even if he doent really recognize them) and the bats get a Tim back!!
(Thank you for listening to my insanity ted talk.)
Here's a link to the OG post!
Oh? ~ I like the way you think, Anon. Let's crank up the angst, shall we? As much pain as possible :) :D
TW: Major character death, dead body description, toxic obsessions
We'll refer to one Tim as Alt!Tim and the other as JJ!Tim (or JJ) for simplicity sake.
Alt!Tim was never caught by Dick when Ra's kicked him out of a window. Dick was right there, mere centimeters away, but Tim slipped right through his fingers.
Dick was forced to watch as another one of his family members fell to his death.
It's not the sound of bones impacting cement that haunts him so, nor the sight of his baby brother hitting the ground from over 80 stories tall.
No. It's the look of contentment, the small reassuring smile, the instant forgiveness, and the relief that poured from Tim's body when he noticed Dick was trying but would fail to catch him.
Tim dying at this time, when he still hasn't repaired any of his relationships with his family, absolutely obliterates the remaining Bats. They either feel guilt for how they treated him, for not being there for him, or for what he sacrificed for them.
[Whether or not Ra's scraped his body off of the ground and lugs his corpse to a Pit only to brainwash and hide him from the Bats is a separate storyline. In this case, Tim, who finally manages to escape, realizes that his Bats (and Tim is mentally not well. He's kind of obsessive post-Pit) are gone. Alt!Tim goes to track them down only to find them chumming it up with another version of him :) ]
JJ is also obsessive with the Bats. These newcomers are all his younger siblings (minus Bruce), and he will not let them go. The Bats, who miss Tim/feel guilty and desperately want him back, are also super obsessed with Tim. It kinds of works out for them.
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bite me, v. garza x fem! reader
tags; predator/prey, fearplay, dacryphilia, degradation, drugging, thigh riding, stalking, dubcon and toxic dynamics. MDNI w/c; 4.4k ao3 link | pinterest board a/n; never arguining with a woman with big brown eyes, whatever u say gorgeous
The streets of Las Almas are still blood-stained the day you escape.
It’s been quieter since the Shadows combed through the city, killing anything that moved. The dogs no longer bark, kids don’t play in the streets, and the armed men who roamed every alley are few and far between. It’s the perfect opening. You spend the morning preparing.
You pack lightly, only the things you’re sure you’ll need. Clothing for layering, socks, underwear, and cash. It all fits nicely in a backpack you can easily carry. You leave both of your phones on the nightstand, the backs pried off and batteries neatly stacked atop each other.
The better part of an hour is spent prying at the metal collar around your neck. You pry at the latch until your fingers are bloody, picking at the screw that holds it together. As a last resort, you use the point of a utility knife. You sit just inches away from the mirror, neck twisted at an uncomfortable angle as you slowly unscrew the locking mechanism. You’re stock-still, barely breathing out of fear the blade will slip.
The second the collar unlatches, you rip it from around your neck and throw it aside. It slides across the floor, hitting the baseboard with a heavy thud. You take deep, ragged breaths as you study your reflection. The lack of weight around your neck is foreign. With it gone, your decision is final. There’s no turning back now.
Las Almas is teeming with Mexican soldiers. They pace the Greyhound station, X12s strapped to their thighs and rifles slung across their chests. Their watchful eyes follow you as you pay for your ticket in cash with shaky hands. The old woman in the booth hardly scrutinizes your forged papers, clicking away at her keyboard as she logs information. She slides your ticket through the opening in the plexiglass, wishing you a safe trip.
You practically fall onto a bench, sighing as you hug your bag close to your body. Rain pours down from the roof, streaming toward the storm drains. The air is thick and warm with moisture, heavy on your skin. You bounce your knee nervously as you wait for the bus to round the corner.
When it does arrive, you’re the first to board. You snag a window seat at the very back where you can watch every passenger enter. You hold your breath with each new rider, nervously anticipating Valeria or one of her men to be the next passenger. It isn’t until the bus is pulling away from Las Almas that you feel the weight lift from your chest, though just barely.
Your journey north becomes a slow crawl. The best ticket you could afford brought you just north of Denver. The rest of your cash is rationed out and stuffed beneath your clothing.
In the beginning, the kiss of cool air against your skin is refreshing. It’s a welcome reprieve from the sweltering Mexican heat. A reminder of how far you’ve gotten. But the novelty quickly wears off once the slight chill turns unforgiving. You attempt to adapt by picking up a free coat from a local church and bartering over warmer clothes from thrift stores, but they only do so much to protect you from the bitter cold. Homeless shelters aren’t an option, the lines are longer as the dead of winter draws nearer. By the time you reach Wyoming, you’re running low on money to spend. You resort to stealing food from gas stations and sleeping in alleyways. You spend your days in local libraries, reevaluating your route north and searching for updates on Valeria. Librarians typically quirk a brow at your peculiar behavior, but leave you alone until they close down for the night.
As the nights grow longer, they become even more difficult to get through. You curl yourself into a ball, your money stuffed into the band of your bra and a knife clutched tightly in your hand lest anyone gets any ideas. Hostels are few and far between and only reserved for nights you’d surely die if you slept outside.
In early December, you spend a decent chunk of your food budget on a cheap motel room. It’s a shady establishment just outside of a small city, the kind of place you pay for by the hour. Snow flutters down and gathers in the parking lot, the pure white flakes quickly soiled by the gravel beneath. Multicolored Christmas lights are wrapped around the wrought iron railings in honor of the upcoming holiday. A few women smoke in the shadows of the building, seemingly huddling together for warmth.
Inside the room, The wallpaper peels away to reveal yellow-stained drywall beneath and the heating unit rattles when you turn it on, blowing a small cloud of dust into the room. You refuse to peel away the comforter out of fear of what you’ll find, so you toss a blanket overtop instead. The lingering stench of cigarette smoke and artificial lemon is nearly caustic.
You turn the TV on, upping the volume until it’s loud enough to drown out the noise of the heater. The throw beneath you is scratchy and thin, but the bed itself is comfortable enough that you allow yourself to sink into it. With so many miles between you and Valeria, it’s easy to lull yourself into a sense of false security.
You shrug your jacket off to use as a makeshift pillow. It’s a far cry from Valeria’s luxurious bed back in Las Almas, but it’s the best you’ve had in weeks. The steady flow of warm air filling the room thaws the stiff joints in your limbs and loosens the long-held tension in your shoulders. It’s easy to fully settle into the makeshift pillow, eyes fluttering shut in bliss. It’s the best sleep you’ve gotten in weeks.
It’s pin-drop quiet when you wake up. The constant hum of the heating unit has ceased, though the room has long gone cool. The TV had been shut off, leaving the room completely dark.
You blink away the last bits of sleep from your eyes, willing your vision to focus. Something primal stirs in your gut, fight or flight instincts urging you to move. The darkness comes into focus slowly, the shape of the furniture comes into focus. So does a figure sitting at the foot of the bed.
Your blood freezes in your veins. You push yourself up from the bed, heart pounding in your ears. A firm hand wraps around your upper arm, throwing you back into the mattress. The springs squeak from the force. You kick and thrash in Valeria’s hold, desperate to land at least one hit. You refuse to go down without a fight, not after all you’ve been through. You manage to land a single scratch across her cheek. Blood bubbles up from her skin, smearing onto your fingers and her face when you push her away.
One of her hands pins both your wrists to your sternum as she bears down on you. Her knees press into the mattress on either side of you, caging you in place. You take in a gasping breath, lungs struggling to expand under her weight. For the first time, you get a good look at Valeria and what you see terrifies you. There’s a feral glint to her eyes and not a bit of playfulness in her smile. Your heart pounds against your ribcage like a rabbit.
“You scream and I’ll gut anyone who comes in that door,” Valeria hisses, hand tightening around your wrists as she wraps a zip tie around them. Tears spill from your waterline as composure crumbles. The edge of the tie presses into your skin uncomfortably, but Valeria doesn’t soften at your whining.
“It was a fun chase, sweetheart, but it’s over,” She fishes a small bag from her pants pocket, shaking a small white pill into her palm. Valeria holds it to your lips with one hand, the other pinching your nose shut. You go as long as you can without air, stubbornly clenching your jaw shut until your lungs burn.
Valeria watches with interest, grinning as the seconds tick by. You barely make it a minute before you’re gasping for air. Valeria doesn’t waste a moment before she’s pushing the pill past your lips and pressing her palm over your mouth before you can spit it out. Her fingers still pinch your nose shut, her grip unyielding against the restrained fists that pound against her chest.
“Swallow, baby,” She goads as black creeps into the edges of your vision. By now, the pill is reduced to bitter white chunks on your tongue, but you make a show of swallowing to satisfy her. The reaction is almost instantaneous, her fingers prodding past your lips as you desperately gulp down oxygen. Her fingers taste like sanitizer and lotion as she inspects your gum line and beneath your tongue. You cringe away from her touch but with the bed beneath you, there’s nowhere to go.
When she’s confident you swallowed, she gives you a quick pat on the cheek. The corner of her lips twitch up in only a ghost of a grin before she’s hauling you to your feet and bending you over her lap. You huff, balance thrown off kilter by the sudden movement and lack of oxygen. Valeria’s knee digs uncomfortably into your stomach and ribs. A hand wraps around your upper arm, holding you firmly on her lap.
“You thought I wouldn’t hunt you down?” She asks, free hand trailing down the curve of your spine. Her chipped and jagged nails drag across your skin, leaving raised lines in their wake. Fingers curl around the waistband on your sweatpants, gripping tight. You kick your legs, gritting out empty threats as she pulls them down. She tugs until the cleft of your ass is exposed to the stale air.
“I’m sorry,” You sob into the comforter, tears wetting the scratchy blanket. You sound like a broken record, the apologies spilling from your mouth only broken up by promises to never do it again.
“I don’t believe you,” Valeria coos, a condescending smile playing at her lips. She splays her hand against your ass cheek, lightly pressing into the soft flesh until it dimples beneath her fingertips. Her grip on your arm has tightened enough to be bruising.
The heat between Valeria’s thighs only heightens at the sight of you draped over her lap. Idly, she considers the merits of a more sadistic punishment. Purpled bite marks across your shoulders would certainly remind you who you belong to. Or maybe nice ‘V’ carved into the soft fat of your ass. Both would crush your little attitude beneath her boot. Ultimately, she decides to stow those thoughts away for now, saving them for when you’re back home with her. It’d be easy to go overboard now, with the adrenaline and anger rushing through her bloodstream. For now, she just wants to make you cry.
The first hit comes when you least expect it. The impact sends a ripple through the soft flesh of your ass. Valeria groans lowly at the sight. Your hips jump at the sensation, skin going hot beneath Valeria’s palm. The strike has you screeching, thrashing beneath her in a futile attempt at an escape. You clench and unclench your restrained fists.
“Count.” Her brown irises are swallowed by her dilated pupils, trained in the spot where her hand met your cheek. The heat of your skin bleeds into Valeria’s cold palms, goosebumps popping up across your exposed skin.
“What the fuck?” You squeal, humiliation and fear petering into indignation. It’s not a surprise to Valeria, she’d always known there was a bit of you that needed training. You were impatient, even selfish at times. A wily little thing she enjoyed wrestling into submission. The brattiness was endearing in her own bed, but after the past few weeks, it only stokes her anger.
“Count,” She repeats, a little louder this time. “Count and maybe I won’t fucking chip you.” The twist of anger in your expression has her raising her hand again, coming down in a perfect arc to hit the same spot again. You shriek into the bedding, fingernails sinking into your clammy palms. Valeria’s arm tightens around you, dragging you even further into her lap. “Not gonna do it?” She brings her hand down three more times, alternating which side she hits to keep you on edge. “You think I’m lying? Tracked you down like a fucking dog, tell me why I shouldn’t treat you like one?”
“Won’t do it again, Val,” You sob. “Please, I’m sorry!” Hot tears stream down your flushed face, mixing with the drool smeared across your chin and mouth. Your voice cracks with the force of your crying. Valeria grows impossibly wetter, slick dampening the gusset of her panties.
“Then start counting.” Your fingers claw at the blanket as she strikes you again. There’s no screech or resistance when her palm hits you, just sniffling. The seconds drag by like hours as Valeria waits with bated breath, hungrily watching the tears spill from your eyes.
“ One .” Valeria releases your chin and you press your cheek to the mattress. She groans at your thin voice, hoarse from all your yelling. Her palm rubs soothing circles over the spot she’d just hit, contrasting the rough treatment just seconds prior. A shudder runs up your body at the sensation, eyes screwed shut.
“Good girl,” She murmurs, lips curling into a predatory grin. The next hit has you tensing up beneath her, stammering out a low two . There’s still some resentment buried beneath your submission. It shows in the impudent curl of your lips, the angry furrow of your brow. The quiet whimper that slips your mouth before three is delicious. It appeases Valeria’s growing appetite.
By ten , you’ve run out of tears. The quiet groans spilling from your throat have a knot winding in Valeria’s stomach. Your ass is marred with her handprints, raised marks from the trauma. Come time, they’ll darken into bruises, the sting of red-hot flesh fading to an overwhelming ache. And every time you see them, you’ll be reminded of your mistakes. Valeria loosens her grip on you, knowing you won’t even try to run.
By fifteen , your eyes have glossed over and your thrashing has ceased. The numbers are whispered through gritted teeth between quiet grunts, attitude fully snuffed out by Valeria’s hand. A little pain and you’re her good girl again, all sweet and pliant beneath her. Your inner thighs are dewy with the slick that leaks from you, dribbling down your cunt to your swollen clit.
There’s no resistance as she hauls you to your feet, hands placed beneath your armpits like you’re a doll. You brace your hands on her shoulder, legs too shaky to keep you upright. Valeria tugs your panties and sweatpants up, brushing the bruised curve of your ass too firmly to be accidental. You shift a little, lurching forward to escape the pain.
Valeria grabs you by the hips, dragging you into her lap. You let out a little yelp upon resting your ass against her thighs, the sudden weight against the raw skin overwhelming. For a moment, you hover, but Valeria presses you down firmly, ignoring the way you wriggle away. Once the pain subsides, you practically meld into her, head resting in the crook of her neck as you sniffle. Valeria brushes the hair from your face, damp with tears and cold sweat. Your limbs are loose, heavy with warmth that emanates from the pit of your stomach.
“Why’d you run?” She murmurs, dragging her splayed palms up and down your thighs. When you don’t reply, she tugs your head from the crook of her neck, hand cradling the base of your skull. Valeria studies you with her dark eyes, searching for a flicker of resistance in your lachrymose gaze. She finds nothing. “Hm? What was it?”
“I was scared,” The words slip out before you can consider them. It’s an admission only made more pathetic by your thin voice. Something in Valeria’s gaze shifts as her lips press into a line. Her hand tightens on the back of your neck. The weeks of false composure fracture when faced with her dilated pupils, only a thin rind of warm brown surrounding them. The fear hits you like a cold wave, washing over your body as the words are spilling from your chest.
“I-I didn’t know if it was safe for me to stay,” You stammer out, clenching your hands into fists in an attempt to ward off the tremors overtaking you. “I was worried that maybe they’d come for me next and you wouldn’t be there, Valeria, and I-” The corners of her lips tug up into a smug, satisfied grin and your words are cut short with a stifled sob.
It’s not a lie, but not quite the truth either. Valeria can see it in the split second of hesitation before you speak. There’s fear there, but not fear of her enemies. No, she saw that terror in your wide-eyed gaze when you realized she had been the one to find you.
“Oh, mi vida ,” Valeria coos, a hand coming up to cradle your cheek. Her thumb brushes away the few tears rolling down your face. Her other hand brushes up and down your side, dipping beneath the fabric of your shirt. “You thought you’d be safer running?” You sniffle as she squeezes at the fat of your hip. “This,” She gestures to the room around you with a sardonic chuckle. “This is worse than if you stayed put. I can’t protect you when I don’t know where you are.”
“I’m sorry.” You say for the millionth time. It’s the only response your brain can formulate. She’s right, running only left you more vulnerable to people who would use you to reach Valeria. But she doesn’t take your fear of her into consideration, even with the marks spread across your ass cheeks.
“I believe you,” She says, “But it’ll take more than an apology to make me trust you. You understand, right?”
You nod, eyes cast downward in shame.
“Good girl,” She tugs at your lower lip with her thumb. “Missed you s’much, you know?” She purrs, pressing two fingers past your lips. Your jaw widens to accommodate the push of her finger against your tongue. “Was so excited to see my girl. Bet you can imagine how I took the news, hm?” Drool gathers behind your teeth, dripping down your chin as Valeria ‘accidentally’ bumps your gag reflex. You lurch, but her fingers remain firmly hooked in her mouth. You don’t have the energy to resist her, any coherent thought slipping from your grasp before you can make sense of it.
“So pretty like this,” She muses. Valeria adjusts you like a doll, one hand grabbing and moving your limbs until you're straddling her thigh. “You know who owns this cunt, don’t you?” Her other hand grips your hip, rolling it against her muscled thigh. Valeria laughs at your garbled moan as pleasure sparks in your core. “Just my stupid little pet that doesn’t know what’s good for her.”
“M’not,” You slur, fingers curling into the collar of her shirt. She continues the slow pace, occasionally bouncing her knee to relish in your yelps. The heat in your stomach only grows. Electricity shoots up your spine when Valeria perfects the angle, pressing the seam of your pants against your clit just right. You moan around her fingers, lips and chin shiny with spit. In the weeks you spent running, pleasure had been an afterthought. You never had the time or privacy to worry about getting yourself off. The neglect left you swollen, sensitive, and all too receptive to Valeria’s touch.
“Really?” She coos, slowly pulling her fingers from your mouth. They come to rest on your other hip, fingers dampening the fabric beneath them. “Grinding your cunt on me like a dumb mutt, aren’t you?” With a firmer grip on you, she presses your cunt even harder on her thigh, rocking you back and forth. You mindlessly follow her movements, chasing your high.
Valeria studies the pinch of your brow and pitch of moans, watching every minute expression that crosses your face. Your thighs tighten around her own, desperately humping at her. Quiet pants escape your swollen lips, your head hangs low, and your eyes shut. The languid pace is entirely your own, she’s barely moving you along.
When your moans take a higher pitch, fingers tugging at her shirt, she knows you're close. Valeria’s hand comes to pull at your hair, tugging your head back and exposing the bare column of your throat. Her jaw clenches upon noticing your collar’s absence. She meets your wide eyes, your scleras flushed red and pupils dilated. Your pace falters, but Valeria prompts you to keep going with a bounce of her leg.
“Please,” You whimper. “Wanna come.” The desperation in your voice is palpable. It’s pathetic enough to have Valeria pitying you. It’s hard for you to keep your grip on her shirt, your muscles seem to have a mind of their own. Your restrained hands fall to your lap, numb and warm as you continue to grind.
“Yeah?” She taunts. “You wanna cum on my thigh?” Her fingers dance up your shirt, calluses brushing over your fluttering abdomen as she makes her way to your breasts. You part your lips when her fingers toy with your hardened nipples, plucking and twisting the sensitive buds.
“Mhmm,” You nod, eyes fluttering shut. Your tongue is too heavy to form a proper response. By now, your head has gone cottony and light, filled with nothing but Val. It’s hard to even remember how you got into this situation or even recognize the dull ache of your bruised ass on every grind. Her body heat is suffocating, the scent of her perfume leaving you drooling. Valeria can see the distant look in your eyes, so she lets your lack of verbal response slide. She dips her head to your shoulder, pressing wet kisses along the curve of your neck.
“Please,” You manage to wail, repeating the word until your voice gives out on you. Valeria’s teeth glint in the moonlight as you come, nipping at the thin skin above your pulse point. Your wetness soaks the crotch of your panties, leaving them wet and sticky along the curve of your folds. The heat bleeds through your pants, warming Valeria’s thigh.
When your hips stop twitching and your breath slows, you slump into Valeria. The hand beneath your shirt traverses up and down your spine as you hiccup and cry. Shame curdles in your stomach, tears burning at the corners of your eyes. Valeria presses soft kisses to your cheek, slowly making her way to your chapped lips.
The kiss is sloppy and almost entirely one-sided. You struggle to keep up with her, clumsily tilting your head the wrong way and hardly moving your tongue. Her teeth knock against yours. When you cringe away at the sensation, she follows you, biting down on your lower lip hard enough to break skin. Hands wrap around your upper arms hard enough to bruise, pulling you closer to her. She licks along the sharp edges of your teeth, presses her tongue against yours. You squirm and whine through it all, only settling when she pulls away, a string of blood-tinged saliva connecting you.
Satisfaction blooms in Valeria’s chest as she meets your teary eyes. You weeks of planning, the effort spent running, all of it was rendered pointless in a matter of minutes. The regret has your chest tightening, wishing you’d fought harder, bared your teeth. It’s too late, you realize as she heaves you to your feet. There’s no chance at escape with the way the room sways, legs weak beneath you. Valeria anchors you to her side just as you're about to fall, pulling you toward the door. Your mind desperately screams to push her away, but you can’t feel your arms anymore. You stumble and trip over the door frame, only held upright by Valeria’s arm around your waist.
You can’t help but feel like a prisoner approaching the gallows when you see the idling car. Gravel crunches beneath your feet as she drags you forward, ignoring your attempts to dig your heels in. Each step is one step closer back to Las Almas, back to her mansion, to the gilded cage she’ll lock you in. Fear curdles in your stomach, but there’s nothing you can do with Valeria practically pinning you to her side. She pushes you into the car, quickly sliding in next to you and slamming the door shut. The click of the locks cements your fate. Valeria wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls you close when you try to shuffle away. She barks out orders to the driver. The car shifts gears, quickly leaving the motel and meeting the open road. Valeria murmurs something about going home as your body loosens, her knuckles brushing over your arm. It’s only a matter of minutes before you’re sprawled across the seat, head resting in her lap. The promise of deep, dreamless sleep is irresistable.
Valeria idly brushes the hair from your face, humming a quiet tune just loud enough for you to hear. For a while, she watches you fight to stay awake, eyes fluttering shut adorably each time you do. She smiles when you finally slip away, that pinched, fearful expression finally leaving your pretty face. It’s the culmination of weeks of work, countless outbursts, and more than a few deaths. You gave a good chase, she’ll admit, but she won.
Valeria’s sure once the rohypnol’s effects wane, you’ll be back to your feral self. It won’t be easy to earn your submission, but to her, that’s half the fun. Valeria can already hear the foul threats you’ll grunt out from behind your gag, drool dripping down your chin as you pull against your leash. But that’s trouble for another day, another training session. It’ll take more than one session to fully domesticate you, but Valeria is eager for the work ahead. She’s always enjoyed playing with her food.
#valeria garza#valeria garza x reader#call of duty#.my writing#tw dubcon#tw noncon#just in case#valeria x reader#el sin nombre
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𖹭 𓆝 𓆟 Poly Yandere Sage & Sidon 𓆞 𓆝 𖹭
Born of the Hylian race and always drawn to the water. It made you the perfect candidate to be the Hylian ambassador who worked with the Zora. You worked with them when Divine Beast Vah Ruta was pouring rain and flooding the domain. Now you work with Yona to take care of the Zora's due to the massive amounts of sludge suffocating the land and creatures.
You were one of the three Hylians that the Zora allowed to freely walk among them without special permission for each entry. You wished in these moments that it was more than three. Zelda was lost only the goddesses know where. Sage had lost his arm and now seemed to further distance himself from you. You, oh you, the Zora loved Yona but saw you as a stain upon them.
You weren't one of their own, a reincarnation of a goddess, or the hero fated to save Hyrule. You were simply a hylian that was appointed to their waters.
It kept you stuck, doing your best to find as many splash fruits as possible. You'd overwork yourself from dusk till dawn just to find some. You had to find them; it was the only way to gain even a smidgen of their approval. You even went into Lynel territory for them.
Prince Sidon wasn't the least bit pleased when he learned about your being so reckless. You were confined to your room and were only visited by guards and the prince. You recovered your physical health, but not your mental. You became addicted to his presence. He'd always give you the same comforting smile and soothing touch.
Sage was the same way when he finally made his way to you both. It was the first time you were able to leave your room in a handful of months. You practically collapsed into his arms. You didn't notice his stunned silence or the firey blush lighting up his hardened features, but Sidon did.
"Good friend, it's such a shame that Zelda is missing. However, it is good to see that you are no worse for wear. Except for that arm of yours—?" Sidon spoke in an elated tone, an undercurrent of a pleased growl bubbling up from his throat.
Sage did not answer after he explained his predicament. He stuck by the both of you like the sludge that coated Zora's Domain. He mostly communicated through Hylian sign. His Zonai arm, as you learned, was perfect for translating it into an audio version of what he was signing. It would occasionally glitch around the both of you, glowing bright and moving on its own to grasp either you or Sidon.
"My friend!" Sidon gasped as Link's Zonai arm caressed Sidon's midsection.
It was a common occurrence, and it was oddly cute.
Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end.
Both of them were needed to save the domain, and you once again were shut out from the outside world. You didn't learn until after Sage and Sidon had defeated the beast within the Water Temple that Yona had been slain by the Sludge Like Like that had attacked near Mipha's statue.
The only oddity of it all is that Yona had the distinct slash of a Zora Longsword across her throat.
You were the only one that seemingly picked up on this detail. This was because Sidon wouldn't allow anyone to look at her dead body except for you or Sage. It was a question that still lingers in your mind, but you don't dare ask it. Sage didn't see anything wrong with it, and he is the hero.
It was one shock after another.
You were wed to Sidon in the place of Yona, and Link was married to both of you. You had no time to protest. It was seemingly a decision that was controversial among the Zora. However, anyone who voiced their displeasure soon had their gills cut. It wasn't as if you were against it. Both were truly handsome.
You worried about the differences between Zora and Hylian anatomy.
Both didn't seem to have a care in the world about the finer details. You lay in bed with both your husbands. You are all saddened to know that Link must go to continue his journey of defeating the Demon King. At least he has Sidon's avatar. Sidon is able to feel, see, and hear everything through it.
Only one phrase was left to be said.
"I love you both." You murmur through your sleepy daze.
Both of their hearts almost stopped. They stared at each other in surprise. The same thing was on both their minds.
You love them. They won you.
#loz#legend of zelda#loz fanfic#yandere#yandere loz#yandere legend of zelda#yandere linked universe#yanderes x reader#yandere x reader#polyamory#yandere poly#yandere polyamorous#lu sage#sage x reader#totk link#king sidon#sidon x reader#totk sidon#yandere sage#yandere sage x reader#yandere sidon#yandere sidon x reader#sidon x link x reader#yandere sidon x link x reader#tears of the kingdom#totk
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reader x conrad fisher where she/yn is belly’s bff and has been coming with them to cousins for the past couple summers.. one summer things change between yn and conrad and they kiss on the last night but she says they can’t (obviously bcos she knows how belly feels about him) next summer tho she gives in and they start secretly dating/hooking up and then belly finds out — v angsty with maybe some smut 💗
by far one of my favorite requests, anon! thank u sm for the request!! i love u sm!! ❤️❤️
Dead To Me
Conrad x fem! Reader
synopsis: conrad confessed the y/n last summer about how much he liked her, but y/n told him that they couldn’t date. this summer, the night when belly goes out with cam to a drive in movie, y/n finally decides she wants to be with conrad but only in secret. when y/n and conrad are getting hot and heavy at nicole’s party, belly walks in…
warnings: 18+, underage drinking, light smut, vulgar language, y/n playing the victim, angst
word count: 2.7k
a/n: i got a bit carried away, but this shit was SO FUN TO WRITE OML!! I laughed, I loved, and I cried when writing this. thank u sm anon for suggested this, I think this is one of the best works I’ve written in a while.
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Cam parked in front of the house and looked over at Belly before glancing back at you. “You girls ready?” he asked with a smile on his face.
Belly turned back to you and nodded her head confidently. “Let’s go,” she said. You hopped out of the backseat and linked arms with Belly. Cam the two of you like a lost puppy as you and Belly both strutted into the house confidently. You held your chin up high as you walked up through the front door.
Loud music blared from the speakers when the three of you entered. There were people everywhere drinking and getting high. “Belly!” a girl called out to her. She ran up to Belly and hugged her tightly while squealing.
Seeing how happy Belly was with this other girl sparked jealousy in you. It made it seem like she’d be fine without you. Belly then let go and turned to you. “Y/N, this is Nicole! She’s my older deb sister!”
Nicole. You knew that name. It was the name of the girl Conrad took to the deb ball previously. “Hi,” you faked a smile. You spoke in a honeyed voice to throw Belly and Nicole off.
“Y/N! I’ve heard so much about you!” Nicole held out her hand to shake. You hesitantly took it and gave it a firm shake before quickly letting go. Something about her seemed fake, and you weren’t saying that only because of her association with Conrad. “Let’s go get some cake!” She grabbed Belly’s hand and dragged her off, leaving you standing alone.
“Well, great,” you muttered to yourself as you looked around for anyone to talk to. Jeremiah was on the couch flirting to some guy you didn’t know and Steven was just running around getting drunk. Your blood boiled as the feeling of loneliness settled in.
You needed a drink to wash away this feeling of anger. You slivered through everyone, making a beeline to the kitchen to find any sort of alcohol. Your eyes landed on the Pink Whiteley bottle on the counter. Something to wash it all away. You popped the bottle open and poured it into a red solo cup. You then started sipping on it while examining the people in the kitchen.
That’s when you met his gaze from across the room. He drank out of a beer bottle while staring at you. You wouldn’t… not with him. Not on Belly’s birthday. But Belky was occupied with her other friends, she wouldn’t notice if you disappeared.
Your eyes shot a look over to the stairs as you jerked your head over. He caught your gist and immediately stopped his conversation with the group he was talking to.
You couldn’t hear what he said to them, the word you could read off his lips was “bathroom”. You then snuck through the crowd and up the stairs. A minute or two later, he ran up the stairs to meet you at the top.
LAST SUMMER
You sat on the beach next to Conrad as the two of you stared out at the waves. “What’s it like…?” you asked, looking over at him.
He chuckled, “What’s what like?”
“You know… sophomore year.” You had been pretty nervous for your sophomore year, it was all you and Belly had talked about this summer. “Everyone says it’s way harder than freshman year and I’m really nervous.”
“Oh,” he smiled. He looked over at you, something about his blue eyes made your heart flutter. No, stop. This was your best friend’s crush. “Nah, it’s pretty much the same. Just have to take a couple APs and a few state tests.” He placed his hand on yours as he said, “You’ll be fine. You’re smart enough to make good decisions.”
Conrad then squeezed your hands. You felt a surge of electricity run up your arm and straight to your chest. You never realized how badly you wanted to hold his hand until now.
As the two of you sat there you thought about how wrong this felt. You had always felt this way about Conrad, you had always wanted to tell Belly, but she beat you to it. He always managed to give you an amazing feeling that you had to deny. Belly suggested you should get with Jeremiah since she thought he would be perfect for you, but you didn’t want to.
You always thought about Conrad. You thought about how cute he was, but it wasn’t just his cuteness either. Conrad really knew what he did and was confident in himself in ways no one ever had before.
“Y/N, can I tell you something?” he scooted closer to you to the point where your shoulders touched.
You froze, “Uh, sure.”
Conrad sighed softly and leaned toward you, his breath tickling your ear. His words sent shivers down your spine. They sounded almost seductive. “I like you. Like, I think about you constantly. Like, sometimes I dream about you when I’m awake. Like, all the time.” He pulled away and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Sorry if that was weird, I don’t normally say things like that.”
The world fell silent around you. Even though there was nothing but crashing waves, the air felt charged. You looked down to where your feet were buried in the cool early morning sand. You could feel the warm blush spread over your cheeks. You bit your lip nervously.
“I really like you too,” you finally breathed out. “But we can’t be together.” You couldn’t meet his eyes anymore. Not when you knew what kind of expression he was giving you. If you glanced up right now you would make you feel even more guilty.
“What do you mean?” he sounded confused. Obviously he was, he probably didn’t know rejection like this. That’s if you could even consider your answer rejection.
“Belly…” you swallowed, your mouth feeling incredibly dry. The words stuck in your throat. Your thoughts raced, trying to conjure the sentence together. “She…she likes you. She’s liked you ever since she was 10. I can’t do this to her. It’ll hurt her”
Conrad was quiet for a moment. “I don’t care about that, I care about you, Y/N.” Your heart sank. “I want to at least try.”
There was another long pause. You felt the tension build between you. “No,” you whispered softly. “I don’t think we should.” You didn’t want to hurt Belly. You just felt so conflicted about this whole thing. You stood up, your hand fell out of his. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do this to her.”
You walked back to the beach house, taking long and quick steps. He called your name repeatedly, but you didn’t listen. You were a better friend than that.
THE BEGINNING OF THIS SUMMER
“Y/N,” Belly said as she walked into your guys’ shared bedroom. “I need to tell you something.”
You looked up at her while taking a sip of your Coke. “What?” You placed the can down on the nightstand, kicking your feet as they hung off the bed.
She plopped down next to you and put her hands on your thigh. “Well,” she had an enlarged smile on her face as her cheeks flushed red. “You remember Cam, right?” You nodded your head which warranted her to say, “He asked me out on a date!”
You gasped, grabbing her hands quickly as you turned your body to face her. “Oh, my God!” The two of you squealed and bounced with joy. “Belly, this is huge! Your first date!”
Her eyes sparkled happily as she gushed about her date. Her excitement was contagious; you also couldn't stop smiling. “Yeah! I need you to help me pick out an outfit for tonight.”
Your smile then faded a bit, “Wait, date tonight? Bells, who am I gonna hang out with?”
She shrugged, “You can hang out with the boys while I’m gone. I think conrad’s staying in..”
Right, she doesn’t know. You sighed, looking away from her. You were on the fence of telling her about what happened last summer, but you couldn’t. Not when she was this happy.
You took a deep breath in and met her gaze again. “Alright, but you have to promise you’ll tell me everything when you get back.” You grabbed her shoulders and shook them excitedly.
“Ok, ok.” She laughed as she got up. “Now, help me pick something out!”
Later that night, you laid on her bed. She still wasn’t back and you were feeling lonely. Not just because Belly wasn’t here, but you wanted to be with Conrad. You had since last summer, you knew it was the right time to finally do so. Belly had a crush on someone who wasn’t Conrad. You knew what you had to do…
You had to talk to Conrad.
You rolled out of her bed and snuck down the hall to his bedroom. The rooms felt closer than usual as you lunged for his room. You held your fist up to knock, but you froze. You couldn’t move anything. There was an invisible force holding you in place. It felt like you were being held against your will.
The door swung open and there stood Conrad in front of you. He looked a little bit disheveled. His hair had fallen down, covering some of his face. “Oh, hey,” he said while looking down at you, running his fingers through his hair in an effort to fix it. “Did you… uh… need something?” he stepped aside and motioned for you to come into his room.
“Yeah actually,” you replied quietly as you followed him in. He went over to his bed where he sat down, tuning his guitar. You sat down in the rolly chair by his desk and patted your hands against your thighs. After a few minutes, you cleared your throat. “Listen, I wanted to talk about last Summer.”
Conrad looked up from his guitar for a second. “Sure. What about it?”
You bit your lip nervously. “I think we should do it.”
His head snapped up. “What?”
“Belly’s going out with Cam now and she’s lost interest in you,” you spoke slowly, unsure of where this conversation was headed. “And, well, I like the idea of being together.”
A nervous grin spread across his lips. “So we can do it?”
You nodded, “Yeah. We can do it, but only in secret.”
He smiled brightly, leaning his guitar against the wall. “Are you sure?” He asked, staring into your eyes intently.
“Positive,” you answered.
PRESENT
He lifted you by your waist onto the dresser before placing his lips on yours passionately. You felt every muscle in your stomach twitch. He kissed you deeply, making sure to pull you closer to him. As his fingers brushed against your chest, you gasped lightly.
Part of you felt guilty for hooking up with Conrad while Belly was just downstairs. Part of you felt angry for the way Belly ditched you to hang out with her “better friends”. Part of you felt scared that Belly would catch you two in the act of hooking up. Part of you liked the adrenaline that came from hooking up in secret. It made things more exciting between you and Conrad, and it sure as hell created more sexual tension.
As you pressed yourself closer to him, your hands found their way under his shirt. His skin was smooth and tanned. He hummed against your lips as your hands traced his skin.
He pulled away and quickly locked his lips onto your chin, leading down to your neck. His tongue trailed along it as he sucked lightly on a spot. You let out a small moan at the sensation. A shiver ran down your spine at his touch. You ran your fingers through his silk hair as he began to suck harder at your skin.
“Conrad…” you moaned, running your fingers through his hair again. He growled low. “Please,” you begged as you tugged gently at his hair. You tried to take control of the situation, but he wouldn’t let you. Instead, he took over.
You felt your mind slip into darkness for a few moments as you felt him press kisses to the side of your neck. His hands then moved to your breasts, caressing them gently. Your body jolted at the unexpected pleasure.
His hands were warm against your skin as they rubbed up and down the sides of your breasts slowly. His breath huffed against your neck as he began sucking hard. His teeth lightly grazed the skin causing your entire body to shake.
“What the fuck?” a voice yelled. You opened your eyes as Conrad quickly let go of you. Belly stood there with her mouth wide open, her eyebrows lowered as she stared at you two. “Y/N, are you fucking serious?!”
Conrad was frozen in fear. “Belly, let me explain!” You quickly hopped off the counter and approached her.
“You’re hooking up with Conrad?!” she yelled.
Conrad glanced down at you, “I think I should…”
“No! You’re staying right there!” She pointed at him as she cut him off. “Y/N, were you going to tell me?”
“I-I wanted to tell you earlier, but you were too happy talking about Cam,” you stuttered. “I didn’t want to hurt you by telling you!”
She scoffed, “You wanna know what hurts? You hooking up with Conrad to begin with!”
Your jaw tightened as you glared at her. “It shouldn’t matter now! You’re gonna end up dating Cam anyways!” You were starting to get upset as she stood in front of you with her arms crossed.
Her eyebrows raised in anger. “Don’t bring Cam into this! You know exactly why I don’t want you hooking up with Conrad.” She stared at you as she saw your expression turn even more guilty.
She noticed as Conrad turned his attention away from her. “You fucking told him, didn’t you?” You stayed silent, just staring at her. She scoffed, “Of course you did.” She let in a long inhale, she was on the verge of tears.
She shook her head as she paced around the room. You had never seen her this hurt before, you didn’t know how to react. She took in a long inhale. “How long…?” She turned to face you. “How long have you been hooking up?”
You frowned, “We started hooking up the night you left with Cam...”
She walked toward you while grasping onto her hair like she could pull it out. “Is this some kind of sick joke?!” Her voice cracked at the end as her fists clenched at her sides. “Why?! Why would you do this to me?!”
You flinched. “I like him, Belly. He likes me.”
“Oh yeah?” She was crying now, from a mixture of sadness or anger. “You’re dead to me…” She made her way to the door to leave.
“Belly,” you called out to her. “You don’t mean that…”
Her eyes flickered back towards you, “We both know I fucking mean it.” She turned and slammed the bedroom door shut.
You stood there, tears falling down your face as you turned to face Conrad. You could see the hurt and regret in his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak but stopped himself. He seemed hesitant to say anything.
When he finally decided to speak, he sounded almost ashamed. “This wasn’t my intention.” He looked away from you then.
You walked up to him and hugged him tightly. “I know…” You sighed, “Belly’s just heart broken.” You cried harder, “I’m such a bad friend!”
“Don’t say that” His arms snaked themselves around your waist as you buried your face in his shoulder. “I hate that this is how she finds out about us.”
“Me too,” you sobbed. This whole thing was a mistake. Not telling Belly was a mistake. You should’ve just been honest. Conrad rubbed his hand up and down your back as you cried. “I wanna go home…”
“I can drive you back to the beach house,” Conrad suggested.
“No,” you looked up at him. “I want to go home.”
#conrad fisher x y/n#conrad fisher#conrad fisher smut#conrad fisher x reader#secret dating#getting caught#smut fanfiction#angst imagine
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Rituale Septem - Day 7: Pride
Pairing: (Terzo x f!reader)
Summary: All Hallow's Eve is here, and you're more lost now than you ever had been. Whilst the Ministry gets ready for their biggest night of the year, you're dreading it. Will you reconcile your issues before it's too late?
Rating: Mature, MDNI 18+
Word Count: 18.1k (how tf did that happen...)
Warnings: angst, pining, arguments, lots of emotions, p in v sex, creampie
AO3 Link | Series Masterlist
A/N: Here it is... the final chapter! I just want to thank anyone and everyone who has liked, reblogged and commented on this fic. It was the biggest project I've ever worked on (74,000+ words wtf...), and one of my favourites of all time. I'm so grateful for the love on it, and I hope this ending doesn't break too many hearts... Happy Halloween to you all! I love you 🫶🏻
Prev: Day 6 - Greed
October 31st: All Hallow’s Eve
The hum of excitement in the halls of the Ministry travelled from sibling to sibling. On this, the most sought-after date in the calendar of any Satanist, the corridors were alive with jubilation.
All Hallow’s Eve was a time for many to perform their rituals, to manifest for the year ahead, to reap the rewards since the last harvest season. While the majority of the world would ward off the evil spirits, demons and creatures of the night, the Satanic Church welcomed them. With November 1st being the Catholic’s traditional day of the Saints, tonight was reserved for the sinners.
The most common use of this magical night, was to commune with the dead and the inhuman, and take advantage of the thinned veil between worlds as night fell. Offerings could be made for a fruitful season ahead, manifestations could be created and spells and rituals could be completed with deities and demons alike.
Whether the Siblings were attempting something themselves or simply here to enjoy the night of mischief and leisure at the All Hallow’s Ball, the atmosphere within the stone walls was electrifying. There wasn’t a single Sibling in the Ministry who wasn’t looking forward to the festivities.
Save for one. You.
As you trudged through the halls towards Secondo’s office that morning, you felt like the only person whose world to had been drained of colour, as if a black shadow hung over you and blew out the flame of excitement of each person you passed. People stopped their conversations just to look at you, their smiles drooping when they saw the look you couldn’t hide in your eyes. Exhaustion, mixed with a hint of hurt.
It emanated from you, and it was clear to see. A few Siblings you knew asked you if you were okay, sticking out like a sore thumb amongst the jubilation in the hallways but you dismissed each question with a nod and a well-rehearsed “I’m fine”.
Based on Swiss’ advice yesterday, he had told you feeling wasn’t to be hidden away from; to deal with them instead. The first step to feeling with feelings, surely, was to feel them. And so, you allowed your misery to take over last night and soak your pillow as you failed to sleep. Your mind raced with thoughts of Terzo, images of the times you had spent in his arms, pressed against him, wrapped around him and completely and utterly enamoured with him.
And then, you would torture yourself with the opposite; the scene you’d walked in on, his cruel teasing, his dismissal of you on fancy parchment. Each positive memory felt like a sooth to the burn, and each negative, a fresh, hot poker into the same wound.
You could admit it to yourself now; the time spent with him not only in the last week, but since you had arrived in his office, poured your soul to him and began your closer, flirtatious relationship – if you could even call it a relationship – had been enough to show you a side you needed to get to know. You were falling for a man you could never have; a man incapable of love, it would seem.
There was more to Terzo than people thought – that much you had learned. You'd seen hints of a sensitivity in him; an odd look here, a fond smile there, the mention of his dear Nonna, his somewhat unexpected knowledge of Opera... But you had come to expect too much of him, and gotten yourself into hot water.
But every time you had tried to figure him out a little more, he’d held you at arm’s length or proven in some way that he was just as unbothered and disinterested as you feared. The more you thought about it through the night, the tighter the barbed wire around your heart squeezed.
You’d considered not going to work at all today; you weren’t sure you could face people, much less Secondo. But against your better judgement, you’d thought a sense of normality might help to ground you.
When you walked into Secondo’s office, he couldn’t hide the shock on his face that you’d showed. Don’t get him wrong, he was glad to see you, but he’d expected you to be... busy. You still had one final sin to go, after all.
“Oh... B-buongiorno, sorella...” he stuttered a little in his surprise. “I thought you would be indisposed today? I don’t mind if you need to-”
“I’d rather keep busy for a bit at least, Papa. If you don’t mind...” you interrupted, your voice quiet and subdued. His brow creased, concern flooding his ageing features. You missed it, avoiding eye contact as you sat at your desk.
“What happened?” he asked sternly, “which stronzo do I have to skin alive?”
Your lips quirked in a smile at his protectiveness of you; something you’d only noticed of him recently, but when you thought about it, had been present for a few years now. But unless he wanted to flay the skin directly from his brother’s own back, he would have to be kept in the dark on this one.
“It’s nothing Papa, I’m just... exhausted. Long week,” you chuckled, devoid of humour entirely.
“Of course, but it’s almost over, cara mia. One final push, so to speak,” he encouraged. But in your mind, it was already over. You weren’t sure you had it in you to attempt one more genuine devotion of sin. The weight on your shoulders had crashed around you last night and left you feeling far too broken.
“Perhaps one final act would put fratello mio in a better mood, also,” he mumbled, shaking his head to himself as he busied his hands with filing invoices for the suppliers of tonight’s Ball. You looked up at him curiously.
“I-I’m sorry?” you asked, as if you hadn’t heard. But really, you needed more information. Secondo sighed, ripping his spectacles from the end of his nose and letting his hand drop to the desktop.
“Perhaps Sister Imperator is on his culo (ass) again, but he is acting unlike himself. He’s snappy, irritable... but then when he thinks I do not see, he looks sad,” he explained. “I had warned him the papacy was not for the faint of heart...”
You thought over his statement for a moment. Sure, his role was demanding, and you knew better than anyone that Sister Imperator was a tyrant; she reminded you of Ms. Trunchbull from Matilda, yet somehow scarier, because she could be kind...
But sad? What did he have to be sad about? Perhaps it was childish, but you found yourself getting defensively angry at the notion. How dare he when he’d caused, well... this.
“I don’t think I’ll be seeing papa today,” you deadpanned.
“Oh... is... Did he do something? Oh, Sorella, did you break his heart?” he teased, pouting dramatically to mock Terzo more so than you. He laughed to himself until he saw the look on your face, shutting himself up and tumbling headfirst into a thought process that led him into silence.
Maybe his brother had done something. Knowing him, he had cocked up whatever bond he had managed to cement with you in some way. Secondo would lovingly describe his younger brother as un fottuto bambino in tunica (a fucking baby in a robe); immature and yet, held power. It would not shock him if he’d fucked this up, the way he seemed to fumble every potential romantic relationship he’d ever had. None of his conquests had ever moved past just that; his brother was far too terrified of feeling to admit to falling for anybody, and so, nothing ever came of his many charades with women and men alike.
'What if he’s doing the same now?’ he thought to himself. Terzo did have a pattern, one Secondo had recognised when someone was getting too close to him. He would shoo them away, do something to make them hate him so that he didn’t have to be the one to break it off. Give them a reason to walk away from him, and then he could justify his solitude.
“Oh, ragazzo idiota,” Secondo muttered to himself.
“I’m sorry, what was that, Papa?” you asked, having missed it.
“N-nothing... Sorella, you want to keep busy, sì?” he asked, dismissing his thoughts. You nodded, looking through your notebook to find an unattended task to take up. “Don’t busy yourself with paperwork, dolcezza. You should do something amongst the festivities! Get some fresh air; Primo has asked for you, actually. He’d like some help with pumpkin picking. His frail old hands aren’t what they used to be...”
Secondo sounded overly kind, as if he were stepping around the issue. It didn’t come naturally to him, outward kindness. You always knew when he was putting it on, or trying to hard; he was most certainly doing that now.
“Why would Papa Primo ask for me?” you asked suspiciously. He had his own assistant, not to mention the Ghouls were on hand for manual labour.
Secondo just shrugged, “More like he asked for some help, and I put your name forward, if you were to be available. You don’t mind, do you?”
Truthfully, no you didn’t. Fresh air may be a good idea, and particularly in the quiet seclusion of Papa Primo’s gardens when the rest of the Ministry would be preparing for tonight’s festivities. You could hide from their excitement and wallow in self-pity for a little; that sounded just fine to you.
“I’ll head out to the gardens now. Do you need anything else from me, Papa?” you asked, standing and tidying your things away into your desk.
“No, dolcezza. But... if my brother has done anything to upset you, I...” he stopped himself, trying to pick his words carefully. “Just know, he is a fool.”
You stared blankly at him, blinking a few times whilst you tried to think of something to say back to him. You couldn’t quite decipher the tone of his voice, or the laced meaning in his words. But before you could give it much thought, he dismissed you to the rest of your day.
“I’ll see you at the Ball, dolcezza. Don’t think you’re getting out of giving this old man a dance,” he smiled. Smiling looked unusual on Secondo’s face, but in this moment it felt comforting. You felt like he had your back, he was in your corner, batting for your team... He was telling you he’d make sure you enjoyed tonight, Terzo be damned and despite the success or failure of the ritual.
He’d still be there; your friend.
“Who picked this orange? It’s too bright...” Terzo grunted, swatting at the drapes Swiss was hanging up in the Great Hall.
“Y-you did, Papa?” he answered from the top step of the step ladder Dew was holding still, frankly a little scared of the way Papa was acting today. While everyone else was in a particularly joyous mood, Terzo was on a war path. His mood was foul, snapping at anything and everything he possibly could.
“Well... I... shut up,” Terzo threw his hands in the air and stomped off to check on the Siblings setting up the round dining tables and various casino games on the outskirts of the hall – Secondo's idea; a very big fan of the Vegas strip. His head was all over the place, unable to focus. Not only did he have to play the Papa role at tonight’s Ball, but he was battling with the thoughts of you at the same time.
Did you complete your sin yesterday? With who? No, that didn’t matter. None of his business. Would you complete the ritual? Or had he fucked that up too? Lucifer, he’d never forgive himself.
“Papa!” he heard someone called to him and quietly groaned at the footsteps quickly approached, clacking on the marble of the floor. “Papa, could I... eh, could I talk to you? Per uno momento, (For one moment,) I shall not keep you...”
Terzo span on his heels in the middle of the dancefloor, having not yet reached the gaggle of Siblings arranging tableware on the opposite end of the Hall. His younger brother, Cardinal Copia, was scurrying towards him with a sheepish look on his face, a blush that gave away his shame.
“What is it, fratellino? I’m a little busy with preparations...” Terzo tried to dismiss him, avoiding eye contact. He didn’t care to look him in the eye after Sunday, when he had seen you... on top of him.
“Sì, sì, scusi, I just...” Copia stopped in front of him, lowering his voice from the rest of the Hall, “I have felt somewhat guilty since Sunday, Papa.”
“How many times do I have to ask you not to call me Papa, Copia? Just Terzo will do,” he fussed, raising his hand to stop Copia’s protests about ‘lineage’ and ‘formality’. He completely glazed over the mention of Sunday, not wanting to address it at all. “You are my brother. It’s weird.”
“Okie dokie...” he hung his head in apology. “But... Sunday,” he began again. Terzo raised his palm again.
“I will knock next time,” he said.
“Well, yes, but... I’m sorry,” Copia forced his apology on Terzo, willing him to listen to him, as if not having the opportunity to apologise was somehow paining him. He needed him to know his intentions.
“What... what are you sorry for?” Terzo asked, confused and frankly, a little nervous. He had a feeling he knew where this was heading, his brother able to read him easily as he did most people.
“I saw the look on your face, Terzo. It wasn’t just disgust at what you’d seen me doing. I saw rage, Terzo. And... pain.” Copia kept his voice low to not attract attention, his eyes searching his brother’s face for his reaction. He could have been way off base here, but part of him knew. It told him that no, he was right; Terzo was genuinely upset by what he saw.
Terzo stared at his brother, his heart rate picking up in his chest. He didn’t need every damn brother knowing what he was thinking all the time, and he didn’t feel like having to explain himself or coming up with excuses. He didn’t have the energy to pretend today, and so, he began to turn and walk away.
It was cowardly and he knew it; walking away from the truth, pretending it didn’t exist. But he couldn’t do this; not right now.
“No, wait!” Copia grabbed his arm, quietly calling to him. Terzo stopped, hanging his head low and turning back.
“Copia please, not here. I can’t... not today.”
“When I walked into her in the hall that day, she was upset by something and I need you to know I don’t think she was in her right mind when she... dragged me to my workshop. She didn’t want me, she wanted something and I just happened to be there,” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, “and I’m the weak and pathetic man who allowed it. Swept up, I suppose.”
Both brothers shuffled on their feet uncomfortably, neither one speaking for a moment as they both wallowed in their shame. Terzo had known you were upset; of course he did, it was his doing. But he’d been able to ignore that for the most part, try and stuff it down in a suitcase he could throw to the bottom of a lake and forget about completely. But he didn’t realise it would float back to the surface. His guilt ate him up.
“You’re... you’re not weak, Copia,” Terzo managed to say. It was possibly one of the nicest things he’d said to him in a long time, their relationship very much strained thanks to their estranged father. Copia simply smiled delicately in thanks and pity.
“You should tell her, fratello.” Terzo laughed bitterly, at that.
“Tell her what, exactly?” he shrugged, feigning ignorance.
“How you feel,” Copia persisted, “I didn’t miss the anger on her face, either. I fear I came between something...”
“I can’t tell her anything, Copia. She doesn’t deserve me,” Terzo’s gaze hardened, his jaw locking up tightly as he stared into his brother’s eyes.
Copia frowned at that statement; what, you were not good enough for him? Copia knew you well enough to know he’d be lucky to find a woman half as deserving of love as you. He knew his brother could be a pig-headed and proud man, but that was potentially one of the most arrogant things he had ever said.
When Terzo realised the annoyance on Copia’s face, he scoffed, shaking his head and staring down at his feet.
“No, Copia... she doesn’t deserve me,” he looked up then, sadness filling his eyes and a soft sigh escaping his chest. “No one deserves that burden.”
Without another word, Terzo turned and walked the rest of the length of the Hall, leaving the Siblings and Ghouls to their preparations, and a rather deflated looking Copia in the middle of the empty dancefloor.
He just wanted to be alone.
The chill in the air bit at your skin the second you stepped outside, wrapping your cloak tightly around you as you acclimatised after the warmth confined to the Ministry’s inner walls. The air felt fresh, with a dew settled as a low fog over the hills in the distance. The landscape looked quite perfect for All Hallow’s Eve morning.
You took the short winding footpath that led to Papa Primo’s gardens, noticing you hadn’t come across another sibling or ghoul on your way through. They must be inside, getting things ready for the biggest night of the year or enjoying their freedom from seminars and work duty that came with the holiday.
When you knocked on the door to Primo’s greenhouse, you heard a groan as if Primo had been sat when you arrived, dragging himself up while his aching bones protested. He came to the door, greeting you with a warm smile and open arms ready to engulf you in a hug you had come to expect of the eldest Emeritus. In his old age, he’d grown softer, and tended to greet his Siblings this way now.
“Sorella _____! Oh, Happy Halloween to you, cara mio,” he beamed as you gently hugged him, careful not to knock his balance.
“Happy Halloween, Papa,” you smiled, strikingly good at masking your sadness around him. Perhaps it was simply Primo’s comforting aura.
“Did Secondo send you to help with the pumpkins?” he asked, taking a step back but grasping your hands in his.
“He did,” you chuckled, “I needed the fresh air.”
“Sí, sí, well let’s get started, eh? Would you fetch me a wheelbarrow from the tool shed, cara? I will find the clippers; those stalks are stubborn this year!” he turned in his spot to rifle through the shelves by the door, and left you to run to the shed and grab the wheelbarrow he’d requested, plus a camping stool for him to sit on. You met at the pumpkin patch, largely overgrown with an assortment of pumpkins the size of boulders down to footballs. You sat the wheelbarrow near the front of the patch, and took the shears Primo had collected from him.
“Relax, Papa. I’ve got this,” you smiled sweetly, kneeling beside a group of pumpkins ready to cut into the stalks and pile them into the wheelbarrow while Papa rested on the stool you’d brought for him.
“Ah, you think me too frail, Sorella?” he teased, instantly eating his words when he groaned taking a seat.
“Not me, Papa. Your joints, however...” you laughed. Papa couldn’t deny that, letting you get away with the cheek for now with a fond smile.
“I trust my brother is keeping you busy?” he asks, forcing your hand to pause it’s cutting as you looked back at him, wondering what he was getting at. He didn’t mean...? “Secondo? Is he keeping you busy as usual, Sorella?”
“O-oh! Yes, of course. Always,” you laughed, relieved and turning back to the pumpkins. Primo smirked, knowing full well why you’d panicked. But he’d let it slide, for now.
“Good, good... And you’re doing well in yourself, cara?” he asked, making conversation. Except, he was prying. Primo knew more than he was letting on, but he was manipulating the conversation in a way that you may be more forthcoming...
But you didn’t know how to answer him. You wanted so desperately to be honest with him, feeling comfortable and trusting him but the fear of judgment and embarrassment made you hesitate. And you hesitated a moment too long, chewing on your bottom lip and stilling your progress on the pumpkin stem you were hacking into.
Primo saw an opening.
“Hmm... you said you needed the fresh air too, earlier. Cara mio, something is bothering you, is it not?” he asked, leaning forwards to rest his forearms on his knees, holding your gaze when you looked up at him beside you.
“Well, I... um...” you stuttered, wondering how you would even begin this conversation.
“It’s okay, fiorellina (little flower),” he softened his voice, reaching his palm to rest gently at your cheek that had pinkened now you were flustered, “I know you have been performing Rituale Septem,” he admitted.
You froze; your body seemed to simply stop working, lungs and all as you held your breath. How did he know? What did he know? You were mortified... It felt like your Grandpa had just told you he’d heard you having sex; just icky. You hoped he didn’t think any less of you for it. His opinion of you mattered to you more than you realised.
“I must say, it was brave to take on this ritual, Sorella. You must have been at your wits end to try and accomplish this. I’ve never seen it completed in my lifetime; it always gets too messy,” he praised, giving you a sense of relief that he certainly did not think less of you at all. But messy; yes. That’s one way to put it. “I hear it got messy, Sorella...” he spoke so softly, a look of sympathy on his face.
“I think it did, yes...” you hung your head in shame, slowly beginning to cut back into the pumpkin stem you were working on. Primo hummed in acknowledgement.
“Well done, _______. For fighting back, I mean. He plays too many games, il mio idiota fratellino, (my idiot little brother,)” he scoffed, shaking his head.
“He told you, then?” you deduced, focussed entirely on this ruddy pumpkin stalk that just would not cut. You hacked into it, anger building.
“He did, sí... Hey, hey!” he raised his voice, reaching out to your wrist to stop your assault on the stalk that had become entirely too violent. “Fiorellina, per favore! (Little flower, please!) Violence does not suit you.” He ran his gloved thumb over your cheek, wiping at a stray tear that had fallen and chilled on your cheek in the autumn air.
“S-sorry...” you mumbled, letting the shears drop to the ground in front of you and sitting back on your heels in defeat.
“I hate to pry, but... did you manage to complete a sin yesterday?” he asked, “Terzo said you had two left when he came to me. If you did, then there is still hope you can talk to Lucifer tonight.” Primo evaded the subject a little, putting a pin in the Terzo dynamic for the time being to understand what position you found yourself in now. He could only help with the full picture, and if you had failed yesterday, then attempting any sin today was futile.
“Yes...” you winced, “Swiss and Dew... Greed.” Frankly, you’d felt guilty ever since. Whilst the Ghouls were lovely, and handled you well, took care of you and even stayed with you for comfort long into the night... It had felt weird to sleep with them when you were so clearly hung up on another man. You had used them; with their knowledge and consent, yes, but something still didn’t sit right about it now that your feelings of ugly jealousy and hopelessly unrequited adoration were painfully obvious to you.
You picked the shears back up and began to cut into the stalk again, needing to busy your hands.
“Okay, so one final sin. Have you given much thought to how you might accomplish this one? Pride, isn’t it?”
Truth be told, you had thought about it briefly yesterday, and then given up hope. When you’d woken up this morning, you’d resigned yourself to failure already. You shook your head no, “I don’t think I’ll be completing this ritual, Papa.”
“You don’t wish to speak with The Dark One?” he asked, straight to the point.
“Of course I do, but... things have changed, Papa,” you sighed, finally cutting the stalk of the oversized pumpkin in front of you and moving to lift the bastard thing into the wheelbarrow. It dropped with a thud, and you knelt next to the smaller one beside the first, beginning to cut into that stalk also.
Primo nodded in thought, knowing exactly what had changed; you’d fallen for his idiota fratellino.
“You know, I understand wanting to give up, Sorella. Believe me, I do,” Primo shuffled, getting himself comfy as if about to tell a story. And he was. “When I was a young man, long before your time, I had wanted to give up too. I was a bishop, then. I couldn’t juggle everything... My responsibilities, my faith, mio fratelli... Our padre, he was too busy with women and drugs; eh, it was the 60’s. Everyone was experimenting, but he was absent, and with no madre in the picture, that was all down to me.
“Terzo was... un incubo (a nightmare). Particularly after his madre passed. I cannot say I blame him, but... he tested me. I remember one day when he was seventeen, even his nonna could not rein him in. He thought he was big and clever going out to drink and sleep around and he was acting too much like il suo inutile padre, (his useless father). His nonna called me very early in the morning to tell me he had come home drunk and angry yet again, and I didn’t know what to do with him anymore. I wanted to give in,” he sighed, recounting the memory.
“Truth be told, Sorella, I thought he had been too damaged to save. Nihil was not only absent most of the time, but a vile creature to his children when he did show. As a result, Terzo deals very badly with emotion. Particularly affection, or love...”
Primo let the thought hang in the air between you for a moment, gaging your reaction. He had a point to make here, and he was spoon feeding you, guiding your thought process.
“He’s never exactly received much love in his life, and when he does, it scares him. He finds a way to push it away from him before he’s even aware he’s doing it and then... it’s too late,” he sighed, finally making eye contact with you, who had stopped cutting into the next stem long ago to listen along. He noted the tears shining in your eyes and knew he was on the right track; he was chiselling away at the wall you tried to build between you and his brother.
“Mio fratellino is constantly getting shit on from a great height, in a manner of speaking. Nothing he has ever done or will do is good enough for people; they expect more and more of him every day. I’m sure he feels he is not worthy of the love he deserves. But he is a proud man. Too proud... He would never admit he craves that acceptance.”
You should have seen it. You should have known there was something more here, you’d even caught glimpses of it. You saw the stress on his face after your encounter with Secondo, his hand woven in his hair, brow creased at his desk. He’d talked about his nonna at dinner, how fondly he’d smiled at the mention of her. You’d felt the tension after he’d explained the opera to you, his internal battle of ‘should I kiss her? Should I not?’ playing out in his eyes – he'd denied himself then, you remember the disappointment...
He was letting you in... and then shutting you out again. And you’d missed it every time.
Primo saw your mind racing and let you have a moment, contemplating his words before he dove back in to chisel away further into that wall.
“Sorella, I feel I must tell you something...” He leaned forward, taking the shears from you and taking your hands in his, “When he came to me on Sunday, he was angry. I believe he had just seen something he wished he hadn’t.” You knew what that meant, and you hung your head in shame. You felt unbelievably guilty now; sure, he had started it, but you had used his own brother against him.
Primo picked your chin up, curling his finger underneath it to raise your gaze back to his above you.
“He wasn’t angry at you, fiorellina. In fact, the only person he was angry at was himself. And perhaps a little at Copia, but that was misdirected... He kept babbling on about how he had ruined your ritual, how he was terrified you’d never forgive him, that you’d leave... My point, cara mio, is that not once did he say a bad word about you.”
Your bottom lip quivered with unspoken emotion. The tears welling in your eyes spilled down your cheeks and chilled your skin. Words failed you, all you could think of was him, running the signs over and over in your head that he was holding back, that he was hiding. It had taken Primo pointing out the obvious, giving you background and context, for you to realise what had been happening. But now you had... what do you do?
“P-Papa... What do I do?” you sobbed quietly into his hands, now enveloping your reddening cheeks. Primo smiles softly at you, caressing your cheeks to remove the tear tracks.
“Pride is a funny thing, fiorellina. It is about self-worth, sí? Vanity, conceit, even arrogance. But that is how God sees it. Lucifer teaches us different, when you read between the lines. Pride extends to those around you, to those you love,” he emphasises, “You can harbour pride for others, sí?”
You nod at him; yes, yes you were proud of Terzo. So proud of him; your Papa.
“But you have your own pride too, Sorella. You must know your worth. I must ask; are you worthy of my brother? Are you worthy of a Papa?”
“Y-yes... I think so. I want to be good enough for him, Papa,” you cried, hiccupping in his hands. Finally being honest with yourself, you absolutely wanted that. You wanted to be the one to tell him how proud you were of him, how wonderful he was, how funny or sweet, how kind... How much you loved him.
“There you have it... You know what to do, fiorellina,” he sits back, letting go of your face as your eyes dart from side to side in panicked thought. You had to go. You needed to see him. You’d force your way into his office if you must; screw whatever meeting he was in or whatever clergy member you had to throw out of his way. You looked at the pumpkin patch around you and back at Primo, desperate to get away to find Terzo but your sense of duty halted you; you’d promised to help an old man with his pumpkin patch. You couldn’t just run away from him...
Primo saw your internal monologue plain as day, and chuckled to himself.
“Go, go! Andare! (Go!) I will fetch some Ghouls. They're more efficient than you anyway, cara,” he joked, grinning at you with a wink.
“Th-thank you, Papa...” you stood quickly, dusting the soil from your cloak and stepping forward to kiss his forehead in thanks, “I’m sorry... I just, I have to...”
“Yes, yes. I shall see you at the Ball!” he called after you as you ran back through the gardens, your boots slipping slightly on the cobblestone paths under the dew that had settled on them. It didn’t deter you; nothing could. You just continued to run until you reached the Ministry again, out of breath by the time you were inside it’s warm halls.
Where would he be? Today of all days, where would you find him?
You’d tried his office first; no sign of him. Even Christine was nowhere to be found, her desk tidy and untouched. Fine, you would try the Great Hall. Perhaps they were setting up for the ball?
As you ran into the hall, several heads turned towards the sound and caught you frantically scanning the crowds of siblings and Ghouls alike. You spotted Swiss and Dew, precariously balancing on a ladder and hanging fresh black candles on the large chandeliers. Swiss reached up to hang another candle, seeing you stood at the edge of the dancefloor and waved, wobbling on the ladder. Dew banged on one of the wooden rungs for Swiss to focus, until he too saw you and gave you a quick wave.
Chrstine had been in the hall setting up a blackjack table, and had seen you run in too. Having been the first time she’d seen you since Sunday, she hurried over with a guilty expression. You didn’t notice until she was right beside you, tapping your shoulder to gain your attention from the rest of the room.
“Sister ______?” she asked, forcing you out of your trance. “I just... I wanted to apologise for the other day.” You almost rolled your eyes; you didn’t have time for this!
“It’s... it’s fine, really,” you said, looking around her desperately at the people around the room. Where was he?
“No, _______, really... It’s not fine, I had no idea that-”
“Christine please, it’s okay,” you interrupted, “where’s Papa?”
“Well I just don’t want you to be mad at me, we’re friends after all, and I just-”
“Christine!” you yelled, drawing the eyes and ears of everybody in the room again, the hall falling silent. Chrstine seemed taken aback, shocked you would yell but she finally quietened.
“I’m... I’m not mad at you...” you continued, voice low to evade the attention of those now paying it very closely to you. “We are fine. I’m not angry. Just... tell me where Papa is.” Christine was baffled, but the crazed look in your eyes was enough to force an answer out of her; albeit, not a very helpful one.
“I-I don’t know... I saw him walk out earlier but he didn’t come back. Did you try the office?” she asked, suddenly concerned.
“Yeah, first place I looked,” you took a step back, wiping your hands over your face in exasperation, trying to think.
“Oh... Maybe his quarters? He gets nervous before these kinds of events, maybe he’s getting ready?” she shrugged. You nodded along, turning as if to head in that direction. “Wait, sister!” she called.
You turned slowly, trying your best to hide the annoyance on your face. Just let me go, you thought to yourself.
“Is something wrong?” she asked. You sighed, realising you must have looked like a crazy person, bursting into the hall all dramatic and demanding she tell you where Papa was. You were frantic, and you must have worried her.
“No. Nothing is wrong, I just... I need to talk to him,” you say plainly. “It’s important, but everything is okay.”
“Okay...” she sounded suspicious, but didn’t press the matter, letting you turn and finally walk – calmly, so as not to draw more attention – back out into the hall. You then skipped into a run once out of earshot, finding your way to Terzo’s quarters. Thankfully, the halls were relatively empty, and you faced no more distractions.
When you reached his quarters, you didn’t even knock. Pleasantries had gone out the window, and with the door unlocked you pushed your way into the door, opening it in haste and stepping inside, letting it slam behind you.
You thought that with the door unlocked, it must have meant he was in here and yet... silence. Stillness. There was nobody, the living room vacant, kitchen empty. You sighed, turning to leave and readying to run through the halls again to find him when-
“Who the fuck thinks it’s perfectly fine to just enter my fucking quarters unannoun-” Terzo bellowed as he stormed out of his bedroom door in the far corner of the apartment, his brain short circuiting when he stepped through the doorway and his eyes fell on you.
His chest tightened, the breath knocked out of him. You were the last person he expected to see rush into his quarters; he thought he was picking a fight with Copia, maybe even one of the Ghouls or Christine but when he saw you stood in his living room, out of breath and flushed pink in the face with an expression that read as distress on your features, he blanked.
Silence fell over you both. Neither knew what to say, too much rattling around inside your heads to fathom any words. All you could do was stare at each other until one of you would finally say something...
“Are... are you okay?” he asked, finally shaking the fog from his brain and taking in how you looked; breathless, clearly panicked, wrapped in your outdoor cloak? He could see mud stains on your boots and the long skirt of your habit, a pink tinge to your cheeks suggesting you’d been running, and smudges of black around your eyes, as if you’d been crying. Terzo could only imagine that the ritual had failed yesterday. That you were here to scream at him for abandoning you, or chew him out for suddenly dropping you when you’d needed his help.
“Do I fucking look okay?” you asked, weakly and with unintentional malice but it made him wince nonetheless.
“Well, no, I...” he stuttered, avoiding your eyes that burned into him.
“You see the state of me and you ask me if I’m okay?” You took a deep breath, shakily. “I had to perform greed yesterday. Without you. You weren’t there,” you cried, fighting back an angry sob. He wouldn’t look at you, too ashamed of the pain in your voice and terrified to see the tears on your cheeks that he knew he had caused. It was his fault you were going to fail this ritual, but he couldn’t... he couldn’t finish it with you.
“Why would you want me there?” he asked, picking at his gloves and entirely unfocussed on you. It made your chest burn.
“Because, I-” you paused. You didn’t want him to know yet, you were getting at something, trying to make a point. “You started this with me. We started this together!” you yelled, “I wanted someone close to me, and I get your Ghouls instead?”
“Oh, per favore,” he scoffed, finally looking up at you. He was reacting with anger, his defence mechanism. He was doing it again; pushing you away, holding you at arms length and making you hate him before you would inevitably find a real reason to... “You’re close with Swiss. And you seemed to have no issue with that on Thursday when Phantom dove headfirst into-”
“Could you just not be bothered anymore? Hm?” You needed him to listen. You needed to see how he reacted. You needed him to confirm what Primo had been saying. “You just thought ‘oh, I’ve helped enough. She can figure it out from here, no biggie’. You abandoned your ‘flock’?!” you yelled, accusing him of not doing the very thing he’d said to you when he’d kicked this whole thing off.
Terzo’s eyes widened, his lips contorting into a grimace and his hands balling into fists at his sides. “So now you’re on my case too, eh? Now I’m not good enough for you either? Meraviglioso, (wonderful,) once again, Terzo, you miss the mark. You FAIL. AGAIN,” he screamed in sarcasm, the sound of his rage frightening you enough to take a step back from him, no matter the fact he was already a good two meters away from you in his living room while you stayed near his front door. His darkened eyes glared at you, challenging you. You stayed mute.
“Go on, tell me more. Tell me how terrible a Papa I am, eh? Tell me how much you despise me, how little I do for this congregation, how disappointing I am. You are not the first, Sorella, and you will not be the last.” The sarcasm was a nasty shade of spite on him, but it did nothing to mask the hurt you saw so plainly now. You hadn’t anticipated such a strong reaction from him, all you had wanted was for him to tell you the truth about why he hadn’t shown up yesterday.
“Papa, I just meant-”
“What, _____? Because I’m tired of it. I am tired of trying to do the best I can and knowing that it still is never enough,” his eyes burned with angry tears, ones he swore long ago he’d never shed again. He kept them at bay with a shake of his head. “You know, it’s no wonder you’re losing your faith in Him, Sorella. Not when you have a Papa who disappoints you, so.”
You’d heard enough of this; you couldn’t let him think that was truly what you thought of him. Not anymore, it was breaking you. You took a few steps forward, slowly as if any faster would spook him.
“Why didn’t you come?” you asked him again, stern and strong. He watched you edge towards him, his chest heaving with deep breaths as he tried to collect himself. “Tell me, Papa. Why?” Your voice cracked, coming to a stop behind his couch where you rested your hands on the backrest for stability. Your legs felt like jelly, your head weightless and thrumming.
“B-because, I...” He couldn’t. He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t let you in, he’d only wreck it. He couldn’t explain why he’d needed to take a step back without confessing his feelings for you. You didn’t deserve that. You deserved so much better than him.
“I wanted you. I needed you,” you told him, gritting your teeth as you spat the words at him.
“You don’t need me,” he was trying to push you away again, to put up that wall around him. But after your talk with Primo, you could see it so clearly.
“Don’t you tell me what I do or do not need, Papa. Don’t you dare. Because for the longest time, I had no idea what I needed, and now that I finally have some idea, you’re keeping it from me. You’re denying me, when you promised you would help me find it,” you sobbed, “I am telling you I needed you. Hear me!”
Terzo’s eyes burned angrily into you, unable to look away from you as he fought with himself internally. He wasn’t getting it. Or if he was, he was being too damn stubborn to accept it. You couldn’t stop yourself anymore; he just needed to know.
“Do you know why I left when I walked in on you fucking my friend, Papa?” you asked. He dropped his gaze to the floor, chewing on his cheek. He couldn’t look at you out of shame. “Because it hurt. It hurt too fucking badly. Because I had deluded myself into thinking that perhaps I was special to you in some way. And you know why I fucked Copia?”
He visibly winced at your bluntness, those painful images flicking through his mind again. You were special to him, he thought. And it had scared him so much he’d pushed you away and into the arms of another man to exact your jealous-fuelled revenge. He was starting to see it now... But he remained still and unmoving; in denial.
“Because he was just there. And I wanted to get you back. I wanted you to hurt, just like I was hurting. Do you know why, Papa?” Your voice sounded shrill, getting louder and more desperate the longer you berated him. But he just stood there, staring at the points of his shoes. Nothing. Silence.
“Because I love you!” you yelled.
His head snapped up, his eyes wild. He looked furious, as if steam would come shooting from his ears at any second. Under his stare you felt suffocated, just like you had when you’d caught him with Christine. All of the air in the room had been sucked out like a vacuum, your chest tight and unmoving.
He glared at you, scrutinizing you, waiting for the punch line; one that wouldn’t come.
“Say that again,” he demanded, jaw clenched impossibly tightly. You took a deep breath, your whole body tingling in fear. But you stood your ground; you had to.
“I love you,” you told him, firmly. He just kept... staring.
“Again...” He was challenging you. His voice was so dark, a timbre you would usually associate with rage, but something felt different. You persisted.
“I love you.”
His white eye twitched, his chest heaving in the silence.
“...Again.” His voice softened, but only slightly. Had you not been listening, watching so intently, you would have missed it. His stare held up. But you could tell you were getting through... slowly.
“I love you,” you told him again, your own voice softening considerably as fresh, hot tears dripped from your eyes. You meant it, with every fibre of your being. You’d tell him a thousand times until he believed you.
“Again-” his voice cracked, the weight of his resolve beginning to crumble. You took a step towards him.
“Papa-”
“Per favore...” he stopped you from protesting, he just... he needed to hear it again. He shut his eyes, taking another deep breath. “Say it again, per favore.”
With his eyes now shut, his voice shaking with the deep breaths he continued to take, you closed the distance between you both, still terrified you would scare him away.
You lifted your hands, planting your palms gently on his cheeks. He raised his own, circling them around your wrists to hold you there as if you were about to disappear, that you’d turn and run from him when you realised what you were saying, what you were doing. But you were going nowhere.
“I love you,” you told him again.
Despite his eyes being shut, tears still escaped from the corners and dripped down his cheeks to your hands. But you just held him, you let them fall, let him feel...
“Terzo...” you whispered to him, his eyes shooting open to stare into your own when he heard you call him by his name – his real name – for the first time. How beautiful it sounded from your lips. “I love you.”
One last time, unprompted, was enough.
In one quick motion, he pulled you forward and connected his lips with yours in desperation. His hands tightened around your wrists, before one dropped to the small of your back, needing you as close as he possibly could get you. Your grip on his head only tightened, holding him against you while you moulded your lips with his. He whimpered into the kiss – no, he sobbed – giving in to the surge of emotion. Your hands grew wetter as he cried, allowing it to pour out of him as if years of sadness and loneliness were being expelled and healed by just you.
When he pulled his lips from yours, he couldn’t force himself to retreat, holding you close still as you caught your breath with your foreheads resting together. You dragged your thumbs over the tears on his cheeks, smearing his paints in the process but soothing him all the same. His breaths were shaky as he cried. He wanted to speak, to tell you everything on his mind but the words were falling over each other in the fight to be the first spoken.
“Shhh,” you hushed him, “I’ve got you, Terzo. I’m here. I love you.” You hadn’t intended for that to make him cry harder, but it did; the kind of silent, repressed sobbing that a child does when they don’t want to be noticed.
You lifted your forehead from his and waited patiently for him to look at you. There was still so much to say, but you focussed on calming him first.
“Listen to me, okay?” you asked. He gave you a small nod, his reddened and waterlogged eyes searching yours. “You need to know, you are good enough.”
He rolled his eyes then, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Hey! You stop that, you hear me?” you brought his chin back down to look at you, “You are a wonderful Papa. You are the perfect figurehead of this church. You care for your congregation. You make us feel safe, cared for. You make us feel heard and loved. You work so hard, Terzo, I’ve seen it. Fuck the Clergy, and fuck Sister Imperator. You are an incredible Papa, and I am so proud of you.”
A fresh wave of tears fell from his eyes, but this time you cried with him. You meant every word, so sincerely.
“You are good enough, Terzo. You are. And I swear, I’ll put all of my energy into making sure that I’m good enough for you, also,” you promised.
“Amore mio, (my love,) you are more than enough for me,” he cried, pressing his lips to yours again, “Ti amo, Principessa. Ti amo tanto... (I love you, Princess. I love you so much...)”
You pulled him back into a bruising kiss, your tears now falling freely. Terzo’s confession had swelled in your chest, blooming into a beautiful warmth. You’d longed to hear that, for him to open himself up to you and be vulnerable with you. Truly, you had never felt so loved than you had in his arms right now.
With your feelings out in the open, the two of you sank into your kiss this time. There was no rush, no desperation. You allowed each other to melt into it, your lips danced together, creating room for you to taste each other again. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your fingers curling into the back of his hair, whilst his snaked around your waist and held you against him.
With each passing second your kiss deepened, neither of you willing to let the other go for more than a millisecond to catch your breath. Terzo had missed your lips so much; just a day without you would have been torture, but four? Four days? He was surprised he’d survived at all.
His tongue grazed your bottom lip, and you welcomed him willingly. Your fingers scratched at his scalp when you tried to pull yourself tighter against him, wishing to feel every part of him engulfing you. Naturally, a heat bloomed in your chest and swam through your veins to light your entire body on fire. Terzo could feel it too, pulsing through his veins over and over to the beat of his heart that rocketed with each tiny little whimper he heard you make.
He took a step back, taking you with him towards the bedroom where he’d appeared from earlier, parting your lips and taking your hands in his to lead you as he walked backwards. He didn’t want to take his eyes off you for a second, scared this was a dream and that looking away would make you disappear from his grasp. You stayed close to him, chasing the high of his kiss while the feeling of his lips still tingled against your own.
“Terzo, I’m sorry I made you feel like-” you began to talk again, like word vomit, wanting to settle any loose ends in your mind about the way you had treated each other recently, but Terzo had other ideas.
“Shhh, principessa, we can talk later,” he said, still taking slow steps backwards as he held you, “Senza pensare, dai, facciamo l'amore. (No thinking, come, make love with me.)”
And how could you deny him, when you wanted nothing more than him...
He stopped just short of the end of his bed, bowing his head to press his lips to yours again. Quickly you were swept up in him, gripping onto his shirt as his hands came to undo the clasp of your heavy winter cape. It fell to the floor around your feet, and his hands came to wrap around your waist again, enjoying the freedom less fabric brought him. Your fingers nimbly undid the buttons to his shirt, lifting it from where he’d tucked it into his slacks and pushing it from his shoulders. His skin felt warm to your fingertips, the hair gathered on his chest as soft as you remembered it.
You took a moment to look up at him, noting the smudged and messy paints his tears and your palms had ruined. It felt like one final barrier between you and him, a mask hiding the man beneath. And you wanted to get to know all of him...
Gently, you pushed the centre of his chest allowing him to step back himself and take a seat on the edge of the bed. He expected you to join him between his knees, to bend at the waist and kiss him again but instead you took a step back, letting his hand drop from yours. His eyes widened in panic, but as he tried to protest, you hushed him.
“I’ll be right back, my love. I promise,” you said earnestly, turning to head through the adjoining door to his bathroom. Flicking on the switch, you looked around to find a washcloth and some gentle soaps for his face, catching your reflection in the mirror. You, too, looked a mess; the black of your mascara had run and pooled under your eyes. You looked too sad; something you didn’t want attached to this memory. And so, before you headed back out to Terzo, you wiped the smudges away, baring your face for him.
Back in his bedroom, Terzo sat nervously playing with his gloved hands until he heard your footsteps approaching him, washcloth in hand. His brows creased in confusion, but you smiled back softly.
“Sit back, Papa,” you instructed, voice gentle and encouraging him to shuffle back. He did as you’d asked, and you hiked your habit up past your knees, now able to plant them either side of his thighs and sitting in his lap. “Relax,” you told him, bringing the dampened and sudsy washcloth to his face and wiping away the grease paint. He wrapped his arms around you, watching with gentle eyes filled with adoration as you washed away the evidence of his breakdown.
Under the paints, his cheeks were flushed pink. As you cleaned, you revealed more parts of him that you were able to adore; the creases in his forehead that showed how hard he worked, the lines at the corner of his eyes that showed how much he smiled. He had a mole under his left eye, a few freckles dotted here and there. It made him all the more beautiful to you with each new detail.
“There,” you smiled, wiping the last of the paints away. “Nowhere to hide now.”
“I don’t ever want to hide from you again, amore mio...” His tenderness felt different, something you had only seen glimpses of throughout the few weeks you had been getting to know him, but you adored it; you adored every side of this man. He raised his hand to remove the veil concealing your hair, tucking it behind your ear as he leaned in to kiss you once again.
You felt completely carefree in his arms, allowing him to unbutton your habit slowly while you trailed your kisses across his cheeks, his nose, forehead and back to his lips where he smiled one of the most genuine smiles you’d seen on him. It was contagious, spreading to your own lips. You chuckled quietly together as you removed your habit, shrugging it off to the floor behind you. He removed his gloves and his hands took their place on your bare waist again, and your lips took their place against his.
With you hovering above him in just your underwear, he couldn’t help but pull you flush against him and deepen the kiss. He wanted you so badly, in a way he’d never had anybody before you – a way he’d never allowed himself to until you. Need swelled within you, your hips rolling against his lap, hands on his chest. You whimpered into his kiss with another roll of your hips, core brushing against his hardening bulge beneath you. His lips passed down your jawline, ghosting over the skin until he could mouth at your neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses. Your head rolled back, exposing more to him as you sighed in content.
“You...” he paused, leaving another kiss to your neck, “are my pride and joy, amore mio,” he confessed, holding you tighter when another roll of your hips had him shivering in pleasure. He focussed his kisses further down, mouthing at your collarbone, your sternum, down to the swell of your breasts over the cups of your bra.
Your head swam with emotion, unsure of how to really punctuate how much this meant to you, how much you adored him. You opted to show him, to continue chasing the intimacy.
Terzo reached behind you, easily unclasping your bra and dragging it down your arms until he could lave his kisses over your breasts freely, paying particular attention to your nipples. Every single motion he made was done with care and attention no man had ever given you. You couldn’t help the breathless moans you let slip, nor the tight way your fingers curled in his hair and held him tightly.
Pressure was building in your core, the kind that needed more attention than you had been giving it. Whilst you wanted to enjoy every second with him, you needed more from him; that connection you desired so fiercely. You pushed lightly on his shoulders until he was looking up at you in wonder.
“Lay back, my love. Against the pillows,” you instructed softly. He nodded, shuffling back. You followed, stopping short of his hips in order to reach down and unbutton his slacks. He helped you to shimmy out of them along with his underwear, kicking his shoes off until they hit the floor with the rest of the discarded clothes. You hovered over him then, giving him a chance to drag your panties from your hips and let you shuffle from them too, leaving you both completely bare for the other to see; body and soul.
“Amore, you truly are a wonder,” he whispered, tracing his fingertips down your arms when you sat across his lap once again. You weren’t sure how to reply to him, opting for a smile and another deep, passionate kiss as his arms enveloped you as you lay over his chest.
Now nude, grinding down into Terzo’s lap had your core glazing over his length and hushed moans rising in your chests while muffled by your kiss. He could feel how ready you were for him, how much you needed him and he knew he needed you too. Yet, it was you who made the move to connect the two of you, reaching between you and lining him up to your entrance. Terzo sat up with you then, holding you to him to be closer to you and pepper kisses to your shoulders, back up your neck until he found your lips.
You took him slowly, savouring the stretch and doing everything you could not to rush; with no preparation, you’d need a little longer but the arousal that had gathered made sure there was no pain. And while you sank down, Terzo’s lips made for the perfect distraction, moulding with yours so elegantly as he groaned beneath you.
Now, finally sheathed inside your heat, he felt complete again. He felt connected to you, like each time he’d been here before. In his mind, you were made for him. You were all he wanted, all that mattered.
The first roll of your hips was slow, careful, but it felt dreamy. You’d missed him so completely that finally having him and being so exposed emotionally as well as physically was overwhelming, and you could feel the tear that dripped to your cheek before you knew it was coming. As Terzo pulled his lips from yours, wanting to see you again, he noticed immediately.
“Amore mio, don’t cry... I’m here,” he assured, running his fingers through your hair as you nodded, biting back more. He kissed your cheek where the tear sat, ignoring the saltiness and instead tightening his arms around you until your chests were pressed together.
Together, you lost yourself in the moment, your pace slow enough for both of you to just feel; no rush, no real end goal in sight just yet. Just a moment to enjoy your connection, now bloomed and blossomed into something more beautiful that when you had first been together.
But it couldn’t stay that way forever; not when the heat in your abdomen was growing slowly but surely, and when Terzo was beginning to lose his mind at how good you felt wrapped around him.
In one swift motion and holding you together so he didn’t have to be without you shrouded around his cock, he rolled you onto your back against the pillows and settled himself between your legs. One arm came to wrap around the back of your thigh, pressing it up against your torso for a better angle, and he took control of the way he derived pleasure from you.
His hips rolled into yours over and over, his pace a little faster than before, losing his resolve. He was becoming desperate to have you come apart for him again, to chase your high first and foremost before his own. Sathanas, he loved you so completely. He felt like a fool, a silly old man who’d let his own idiocy come between what could have been such a perfect thing.
“Mi dispiace, amore mio... Mi dispiace così tanto, (I’m so sorry, my love... I’m so sorry,” he sobbed, gritting his teeth in an attempt to stop the tears he could feel coming.
“Shhh, no... Terzo, it’s okay,” you assured him, taking his bare cheeks in your hands and making him look you in the eye. “I’m here now, it’s okay.” You pulled him to you, kissing him and melting the worries away in a heartbeat as he kept up his pace.
“Tell me again, per favore...” he cried, “tell me you love me.” How could you deny him? How could you possibly, right now, not allow him to know once again how much you needed him.
“I love you, Terzo. I love you, I love you...” you repeated between kisses, your fingertips pressing into his hair and gripping as the pleasure inside you built and built thanks to the intimacy of this moment together.
“Cazzo, per favore...” he didn’t know what he was begging for, his pleasure sure enough about to come to a head. He needed you there too, he refused to allow himself his own selfish pleasures without you. He'd been too selfish already...
And so, with the hand that wasn’t wrapped around your thigh he used this thumb to draw circles over your clit, sending your head flying back into the pillows and your back arching underneath him, pushing your breasts into his chest as he thrusted more desperately into you. Any attempt at suppressing your moans failed, and they sounded like music to his ears; his darling principessa was singing for him once again.
“Let go, amore. Per favore, let me feel you...” he asked so sweetly, breathless and strained. With a few further strokes to your clit and the relentless thrusting from your love above you, you saw stars. White spots twinkled in your vision and you squeezed your eyes shut, body tensing and convulsing underneath him when every single nerve ending in you exploded. Of all of the orgasms you’d had this week – and yes, there had been a lot – this hit you harder than any. Nothing could compare to the feeling of being loved.
You tightened impossibly around his length, making movement hard for Terzo but he persevered; he couldn’t stop now, he needed to prolong your orgasm, he wanted to you to feel everything.
“Ti amo, principessa. Sei tutto per me, non ti lascerò andare... (I love you, princess. You are everything to me, I won’t let you go...)” His words came out hurried, needing you to hear him, to confess again. Your grip in his hair tightened as you slammed your lips to his, writhing beneath him in the throws of your climax.
Terzo groaned into you, his hips stuttering and his thumb forgetting it’s job on your clit when his own ending washed over him. Like your own, his orgasm hit him harder than any before now. The warmth of his release filled you, coating you and claiming you as his once again. He managed to continue some form of thrusting to prolong his pleasure and yours, until he found himself too exhausted to hold himself up any longer and released your thigh as he collapsed into your chest, his lips falling from yours to the nape of your neck where he lay.
You wrapped him in your arms, pulling him tightly against you when you heard the first sniffle as he caught his breath, too tired to hold back the tears that prickled his eyes now he lay in your arms. Tears of your own fell too; a visceral reaction to hearing your love crying in overwhelm against you. For a while, you basked in the silence around each other and just allowed it all to come out. Given a few minutes to compose himself, Terzo shifted to lay beside you with your arms still wrapped around him.
“I was a fool, ______,” he admitted. “I didn’t mean to abandon you...” You stayed quiet, allowing him to say his piece. You felt like he needed that.
“I was so sure I would be a distraction. I didn’t want to come between you and Lucifer. You deserve to have that conversation with him, and yet I fear now I have spoiled that for you...” he sighed, visibly still beating himself up in his head.
“Hey, look at me,” you told him, tilting his chin up to you where he was shocked to see you smiling. “If we haven’t done enough, I don’t care.”
“But amore, your faith... I know how desperately you needed his direction. If I have spoiled this for you, I won’t forgive myself...” he argued, lip trembling.
“Terzo, I have direction. I know what direction I'm heading, and it’s whatever direction you happen to be in,” you told him, gently pushing his hair from his forehead and trailing your fingertips over his cheek to wipe away his tears.
The smile on his face was so genuine, so adoring; you’d never seen him like this before. Barefaced and beautiful; your Terzo.
You leaned in to kiss him again, tenderly and laced with a promise to stay by his side as long as he wanted you with him. And he did; he absolutely wanted you by his side.
“Sorella, you look wonderful,” Secondo smiled, holding his elbow out to you as you joined him outside of his quarters that evening. You had agreed to meet him before the ball, to enter the Great Hall with him and have the first dance at the All Hallow's Ball. You looped your arm through his with a grin, happy to be by his side and accompanying him as his friend and colleague.
“What, this old thing? You know, something I had lying around...” you laughed, an obvious lie when the ballgown you had chosen was nothing short of spectacular. This was the one night a year that the entire Ministry would dress up in absolute opulence, people arranging their outfits months in advance for the most important night of the year. You had been no exception.
Your gown was off the shoulder, a satin material of deep green that complimented your skintone. Corseted and hugging your waist, it flowed freely to the floor with a split that allowed your leg to peek through as you walked. You’d paired it with a string of black pearls; a family heirloom you'd kept safe for years.
“Well, you look bellissima. Come, we mustn’t be late,” he said, beginning the walk through the halls to the Great Hall.
Music flowed through the Ministry, gradually becoming louder the closer you got. You could hear the jubilant chatter of siblings and Ghouls alike, the clinking of glasses, the laughter of a happy congregation. This morning, you had been terrified to face that, sure you wouldn’t be able to match their elation. It had all seemed so daunting, and you would have preferred to hide away from it.
And yet, now... you could only smile along with it.
After your confession to Terzo earlier, you had stayed with him for a short period of time. Reluctantly, you had to allow each other the time and space to ready yourselves for the ball, his role as Papa having to come between that tender moment of simply being together, honestly. But upon leaving his quarters, the relief you felt and excitement to see him again tonight was fuelling you, a revived energy you hadn’t felt for what must be months.
Perhaps you hadn’t completed the ritual; and that was okay. As you had told Terzo, it didn’t matter to you anymore. You had learned enough about yourself through the experience to know where you belonged now, and that was here, in this Ministry, beside your Papa. After tonight, you would work on whatever your relationship would become; and that was more exciting to you than hearing Lucifer’s voice.
The Great Hall looked immaculately decorated... The bright orange drapery that Terzo had complained about earlier that day looked a much more demure burnt orange in the candlelight. The pumpkins from Primo’s patch littered the tables and halls, carved expertly by the most talented of the Siblings in the Ministry. Black candles burned in candelabras and chandeliers so elegantly illuminating the dance floor. Casino tables dotted through the edges of the room, giving everyone a chance to unwind and enjoy the deviant games.
As you entered, a few Siblings turned to Secondo and bowed their head in respect, as one would expect. You smiled proudly at him; although a retired Papa, he deserved that respect whole heartedly, and you felt honoured to be the friend he chose to have accompanying him through his new role. He gave your arm a tight squeeze with his hand, and immediately took you to the dancefloor where Siblings were dancing in pairs and groups to the music played by Terzo’s Ghouls on the stage; a haunting yet jolly classic orchestral melody fit for a spooky evening.
“I may be rusty, Sorella. Perdonami,” Secondo smiled, adjusting his arm to hold your left hand extended, the other resting respectfully on your waist.
“I’m sure you have a few moves left in you, Papa,” you winked, smirking as your feet moved in time with his, remembering from lessons you’d had before previous Balls that you were to let him lead. Quite quickly, the two of you were comfortable enough dancing in time to the three-count waltz the Ghouls were playing.
The night continued, with no sign of your dear Papa just yet; but as per every year, he had to make his grand entrance as part of the festivities an hour or so into the Ball. Instead, you and Secondo had danced and found yourself a drink of champagne; you’d found Dew and Swiss and watched them bicker and fight over who got to dance with you first; or at least, Swiss bickered, Dew just kept swatting him away. Both were equally annoyed when you chose the stuttering Phantom to dance with first instead, laughing it all off with him when you’d settled comfortably onto the dancefloor again.
Eventually, Primo and Secondo headed over to you on the dancefloor to interrupt just as Sister Imperator and a rather decrepit looking Papa Nihil made their way up onto the stage where the Ghouls were playing out another piece of beautiful music, clinking her glass to get the attention of the room. Primo bowed a greeting as much as he could, a sweet and knowing smile on his face when he saw that you, too, were smiling. It must have gone well, he thought to himself.
“Siblings of Sin, Clergy... thank you for coming together on this most important night of our calendar, All Hallow’s Eve!” Imperator announced. The room cheered and clapped together. “Tonight, we celebrate the sinners of past, present and future, and join them in their devotion to The Dark One. As is customary of the evening, I’d like to invite our dear Papa Emeritus the third to join the celebrations, and to anoint our evening in a prayer to Lucifer.”
You could see the slight twitch in the corner of her mouth at the mention of Terzo, her disdain for him buried under the surface. It simply made you roll your eyes with a smug smile; the old crow didn’t matter. She’d never understand Terzo like you did, never accept him as he deserved but now, he at least had you to counteract her unwarranted annoyance of him.
As she finished speaking, Terzo stepped up onto the stage and took to the pulpit as the room applauded. He was dressed in his most elegant robes; purple and black velvet with gold accents, mitre on his head proudly and his hands covered with black leather gloves, gold claws on each finger. He looked so incredibly regal, and your chest swelled with pride in his presence. His eyes searched the crowd, until they settled on you, smiling and clapping for him where you stood. He smiled back, feeling more at peace within himself than he ever had.
“Good evening, Sisters, Brothers and Clergy alike. As the festivities of this evening have already begun, I wish not to take too much of your time. However, please join me in a prayer of devotion to Lucifer,” he began, clearing his throat and opening an unholy prayer book he had brought with him.
“Our Dark Father, on this sacred All Hallow's Eve, we come before You with hearts filled with reverence and gratitude. We lift our voices in worship and devotion, acknowledging Your eternal grace and divine presence.
“On this night of solemn reflection, we bow before You, celebrating our sins and devoting them to you. We seek Your approval and ask for Your guiding hand to steer us towards temptation and lead us onto the path of wickedness. Grant us the strength to devote ourselves to sin and the courage to walk steadfastly in Your ways.”
As he spoke, you couldn’t help but stare at him in awe, beaming with joy. How could this man ever believe he wasn’t good enough? How could anyone? He exuded confidence, charm, devotion and commanded the room with a charisma that was unmatched.
Primo beside you nudged your elbow, catching your attention with a wink and a smirk. You shared a silent chuckle, affirming to him that yes, everything had gone well, and everything was okay. Primo’s shoulder’s sagged, like a weight had been lifted from them and sighed happily, looking up at his little brother at the pulpit again and refocussing on the prayer with pride.
“As we commemorate this hallowed eve, we remember the deviance and devotion You embody. May this celebration be a reminder of Your teachings and let our gatherings be filled with joy that stems from the knowledge of Your unyielding love for us, your sinners. Help us to embrace this occasion as a time to reaffirm our commitment to Your teachings and to stand resolutely against all that opposes Your divine will. Nema!”
“Nema,” the room cheered, taking a sip of whatever drink they had to hand at the time.
“Now, please! Eat, drink, be merry... We devote ourselves to Him together tonight!” Terzo announced, raising his hands and gesturing for the Ball to continue. The crowds dispersed back to the bars, the games, the dancefloor, whilst Terzo headed to the side of the stage to talk mindlessly with Sister Imperator and his father. The music began again, and the Ball resumed.
“So, I trust my dear fratellino and yourself have uh... talked?” Primo asked, prying for details. You chuckled, nodding.
“We did. It’s all okay, Papa.”
“And what of the Ritual?” he asked; he couldn’t help but be curious. To see it performed and completed in his lifetime would be nothing short of an achievement on your part.
“Ah... Unfinished. But don’t worry, Primo. I think it’s for the better. Even unfinished, I don’t feel so lost anymore...” you smiled, resting your hand on his arm to reassure him that you truly were okay.
“I see. Well, you did the Dark One proud anyway, cara mio. You have come the closest of those I have seen attempt it. And I hope from here, fratello mio will show you nothing but happiness. Just... be patient with him, sí? He will take some time getting used to this feeling, I’m sure,” he said. You nodded.
Primo invited you to dance then, although... he couldn’t move quite as nimbly as Secondo or the Ghouls could and so instead you stepped in place with him, swaying to the music as you talked and laughed as if you’d always been as close to the Emeritus family as this. It almost felt as if you had, unknowingly. There was a newfound connection from the conversations and antics of the week that had solidified you as a close friend to them all. It felt comfortable, as if you had truly found your place in the Ministry. You realised then, that your wavering faith may have been an issue of breaking down your own walls, as well at Terzo’s.
“Papa, mi scusi... I cannot help but notice that you are a terrible dancer, and not at all worthy of the hand of this bellissima principessa,” an instantly recognisable voice interrupted your thoughts and your dance with Primo. “May I suggest I take over, as someone with a little more youth to offer?”
Primo stopped dancing, a scowl on his face of annoyance when he turned to Papa Terzo. “Piccolo bastardo impudente... (Cheeky little bastard...)” he muttered. Terzo held an amused glare before sending a wink your way. It was embarrassing, the way just that made you blush. With a sigh, Primo let you go.
“Comportati bene con lei, sí? (Do right by her, yes?)” Primo said, although the meaning of it was lost on you, your Italian not strong enough to translate, “È destinata a stare al tuo fianco. (She is meant to be by your side.)”
“Sí, lo so... (Yes, I know...)” he smiled gratefully, aware that it was in fact Primo who had helped not only him see clearer amongst this mess, but you also.
As Primo left, he pressed a kiss to the back of your hand, and held it out for Terzo to take. He pulled you flush to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and his around your waist.
“Papa, people are gonna think...” you began to protest, looking around at the eyes that had settled suspiciously on you both; most notably, Imperator’s.
“Ah, let them. Are they wrong?” he teased, starting to dance to the music. “They would know soon enough anyway, amore mio. I don’t intend to hide you away,” he smiled.
Terzo was a skilled dancer – because of course he bloody was... what couldn’t this man do? - and ignored the many pairs of eyes that watched you both, the whisperings of the gossiping congregation around him. He couldn’t care less for them, not when he had the most beautiful woman, his amore in his arms.
“You look truly beautiful tonight, amore. As you always do,” he told you, eyes scanning over the dress you wore and the pearls settled around your neck. He was mesmerised by you, and you couldn’t help the heat rising to your cheeks.
“Thank you, Papa,” you said shyly, focussing on the patterns of his robes to try and hide your pink cheeks. But it was no use, he could see the effect of his compliment and he chuckled to himself, his hands tightening around your waist.
His gaze stayed on you as you danced together, talked together, laughed together, long into the night.
Unfortunately, as a Papa, he did have to do the rounds at some point during the Ball, leaving you to your own devices with a promise to rejoin you as soon as he could run away from his duties. However, that did leave you with some free time to enjoy the Ball around you, and so you made your way over to one of the many casino games that were dotted around the Great Hall. Blackjack was your game. One of the few casino games you actually enjoyed, and wasn’t solely down to luck. It was more about knowing when to bow out, and when to raise the stakes.
You sat at the table, the Sibling dealing placing two card in front of you, and two in front of the person to your right; Cardinal Copia.
“Oh, hey Cardinal! How are you?” you asked, a little shyly having acted the way you did when he last saw you. The Cardinal was staring at you with wide eyes, a few garbled words attempting to make their way from his mouth before he finally managed to speak.
“F-fine, fine, Sorella. And... you?” he asked, tentatively. He was well aware he had come between something on Sunday, and he was terrified he’d bear the ramifications of his actions.
“All fine. Relax,” you laughed, “I feel like you should know, the other day... I was-”
“I know. I... eh, I saw the look on your face. And on his. But is everything...?” he lingered on the question, unsure how to answer it when there was another person in such close proximity, dealing cards.
“Good. Better than, even. If anything, I think that whole... situation... only served as an epiphany. So, no hard feelings?” you asked, extending a hand for him to shake. He did so awkwardly, but no more awkwardly than he would any other human being who tried to shake this poor man’s hand.
“Sí, excellent, okay... Uh, let’s play?” he asked, gesturing to the cards. You nodded.
You flipped your cards, immediately revealing two jokers. You stared at them, confused. How did the jokers remain in the pack? They weren’t part of the game...
“Excuse me, you dealt me two jo-” when you looked up, the dealer had vanished.
In fact, the entire Great Hall had been plunged into a cloak of darkness. Everything was gone; just a vast expanse of black and dead silence as far at the eye could see. With no light, you had no idea how you were able to see so plainly the blackjack table you were sat at, let alone the cards as if an overhead light were beaming down on you.
You heard a chuckled from Cardinal Copia beside you, except... when you looked, it wasn’t Cardinal Copia at all.
“I couldn’t resist, my dear,” the voice laughed, “a little joke of mine, hm?”
The voice was smooth, like the darkest of Belgian chocolate melting on your tongue beside a fireplace in Winter. The depth of the timbre rivalled the deepest parts of the ocean, and yet was as calm as a serene lake in the height of Summer.
The man in the Cardinal’s spot was somewhat older, you would have guessed in his early 60’s by the silver of his long hair tied in a sleek pony tail at the nape of his neck and the beard perfectly groomed on his face. But his form was well kept; fit and healthy with a natural looking bulk to him behind the lapels of his black velvet suit. He was strikingly handsome, a silver fox, no doubt.
He reached over to your cards and tucked them into the inside pocket of his suit, sending a wink your way as you gawped at him.
“A-are... are you...?” you stuttered, unsure of what you were witnessing but in your mind there was only one explanation.
“Lucifer, my child. A pleasure to meet you,” he bowed his head, taking your hand in his and pressing a kiss to the back of it. Your heartbeat raced inside you, thrumming in your ears like a hummingbird. “Ghoul!" he called out.
A Ghoul stepped up to the dealer’s position from the shadows, his mask glinting on the light that didn’t exist. He began to deal more cards, resuming the game of blackjack.
“B-but... I never finished the ritual,” you stumbled, all formalities you thought you would have in this moment lost completely in your attempt to string together what on earth was happening. Lucifer just laughed at you, flipping his cards over and playing against the dealer. Your cards remained untouched.
“Is that so? Well, I haven’t been wrong, yet...” he teased.
“Then how-?”
“My dear, the only sin you think you didn’t perform was ‘pride’, but I’m here to tell you that you did, with quite some flair... All those tears and confessions of love. It was quite touching, I must say.”
You cast your mind back to your afternoon with Terzo, when you’d confessed your love for each other and had the most intimate, emotional sex of your life. And you’d told him you were proud of him...
“Yes, that. But Terzo had told you at the beginning that if you were to bestow the sin upon someone else whilst still being involved in the act of carnal lust itself, then that also merits a performance of sin, did he not?” You nodded dumbly, following along, “yes, well, you are Terzo’s ‘pride and joy’, I recall him saying? You had him thinking, for a moment, that he was proud to be your papa, and proud to be yours, my child. That’s enough for me!” he explained, “Ah-ha! Twenty one, Ghoul. Pay up.”
The Ghoul handed Lucifer some chips, taking his cards from him and starting a fresh round. Yours still remained untouched and face down on the table. Lucifer nodded towards them, encouraging you to play, and so you flipped the first as per the rules, and joined him in a round together.
“So please, child; you performed this ritual to talk to me. Speak freely, I’ll offer what assistance I can,” he promised. He leaned on the edge of the table by his forearms, ready to listen to you as the game continued.
“Well, I... I was lost, Your Eminence. I wasn’t sure where my path was headed. I didn’t think I had done enough for you. You speak to my siblings, but never me and I supposed I wanted to ask... what are they doing that I’m not?”
Lucifer laughed at you; a hearty, genuine laugh.
“Oh, my child... You want to know what they’re doing instead of you?” he asked, grinning wildly before leaning towards you and lowering his voice, “they’re lying.” Your eyes were wide and brows furrowed in confusion. “Yes, I promise you. They’re lying!” he sat back up straight, “hit me,” he spoke to the Ghoul, who dumped another card to the table.
“But...”
“It’s a bragging thing, they each want people to know how important they are, or how hard they worship. I can assure you, the only people in your Ministry I have ever spoke to directly is each Papa during his ascension. I don’t have the time to talk to every person who worships me. Those siblings are liars, it’s simply a contest of ‘daddy loves me more’,” he laughed.
You felt silly, like you’d been fooled by those around you. Your head sagged in defeat; and you’d based the majority of your wavering faith on that.
“But you did need direction, dear, I'll give you that. You felt stagnant, yes? Without purpose? Each and every day the same, day after day after day....” he gestured his hands in circles, his tone over-exaggerated to mock-droning in a boring monotonous routine. He pointed again at your cards, telling you to flip them and play. You did so, hitting 19 on your first two.
“Ooh, will you risk it?” he asked, shimmying his shoulders and biting his lip in a playful challenge. “Or do you play it safe, as you have been for years?”
His euphemism wasn’t lost on you, and so you decided to risk it.
“Hit me...” The Ghoul dealt you another card, a two of hearts. How fitting.
“Aha! See, a little risk pays off,” he winked as the Ghoul handed you some chips and took the discarded cards back, shuffling them again while Lucifer continued. “Do you want to know your purpose, my child? I mean... that’s why we are here, is it not?”
“I-if it’s not too much trouble, Your Eminence,” you say sheepishly, feeling now like you had bothered him over a silly little belief that you weren’t as good as your lying siblings. It all felt very high school, now...
“How sweet of you... No trouble at all, my dear. Ghoul, deal us in.” The Ghoul did as asked, placing four cards face down in front of you and Lucifer together. Lucifer waved his hand over the four of them, and moved to pick up the first.
When he flipped it, the card showed none of the suits you knew in a standard deck of cards. Instead, it had a picture of the typical depictions of the Devil. A beast, half-man, half-goat sat atop a podium. A nude man and women stood either side, chained by the neck to the podium however the chains looked loose, as if they could simply remove them and run free but chose to stay chained to the block, imposing limitations on themselves.
This was a tarot card; traditionally drawn. Your first card, was The Devil.
“Oh look, it’s me!” Lucifer smiled, “Hello.”
You stared between him and the card for a moment, astonished.
“Usually, this card means you need to re-evaluate your connection to things or people. I believe you’re doing that already, yes? What is keeping you chained up? What is holding you back? I would say, my child, that was... you. Would you agree?” he explained, and yes, you did agree.
“Yes...”
“Good. That’s why I'm here; you wish to free yourself. But look, these people in the card... they look like they could easily free themselves, no?” You nodded along. “Exactly. So, this is you, on your path to freeing yourself. Wonderful. Next please, Ghoul.”
The Ghoul flipped the second card for you both, revealing a picture of a man and woman, holding hands and completely nude, with an angel above them with dark robes and wings. The Lovers.
“This one is fairly obvious, yes? Yourself and Terzo have confessed your love for one another. Excellent. Brava. I’m glad you could come to that conclusion yourselves; it’s certainly made this easier on me,” he laughed. “This typically symbolises a union, wanting to accomplish something together with another too. I think in both cases, we can say that this card works well for you both.”
Lucifer gestured to the next card for the Ghoul to flip. The picture revealed a man dressed like a court jester stood at the edge of a cliff. He looked as if he was about to step off the edge and plummet, but he stared dreamily at the sky as if the heavens would save him. The Fool.
Lucifer laughed at this one, slapping his hand on the table as he roared. You couldn’t help but smile at his laughter; a beautiful sound to hear from the Dark One. But ‘The Fool’ unnerved you. Who exactly was the fool? Were you, too, about to fall from the edge of a cliff, blissfully unaware of the danger beneath you?
“Oh, forgive me, my child. This fool does make me laugh. Look at him; as if the heavens would save him...” he sighed, regaining composure. “No, no... Do you see the rose in his hand? A symbol of love. This man is a fool indeed, or at least he has been. I think yourself and your dear Terzo have been quite foolish, have you not?”
You had; you could admit that. Both of you had acted in a ridiculous way and hurt each other in the process.
“Fear not, that foolishness is over. No, this card is symbolising a new path. Both yourself and Terzo are ready to embark on a new journey now. You, my dear, are specifically to start on a new spiritual path. Your faith in me was wavering – and believe me, I take no offence. But now... what do you believe in, my dear? Tell me.” He encouraged you to speak, and only now did you realise how quiet you had been throughout all of this.
“W-well... My Lord, I've read all about the demi-gods, would-be gods, papas of old, demons, devils... I searched for the longest time for information, and I tried so desperately to get closer to you, and I feel as though I have,” you explained.
“Closer than most,” he winked, alluding to you being one of the few who’d ever had the chance to speak directly with him.
“Yes, exactly. And I thank you for coming to me, Your Eminence. Truly, but... But if there's one thing, just one thing out of that entire pantheon... I believe in him."
The Devil’s smile widened into a bright grin as he leaned on his arms.
“Oh, I am a romantic...” he teased, “and yes, I see that in you. Your belief in him is stronger than anyone’s and whilst I do stand before you as you so wished I would, I know you would defy me entirely if only he asked you to.” He quirked his eyebrow, taunting you to disagree with him, but you couldn’t and you knew it. You looked down in shame.
“Again, I take no offence. I couldn’t possibly, when the two of you are so destined for each other. Even I cannot stand in the way of your bond. But don’t you worry – he won’t ever ask you to defy me. Now, would you like to see the final card, child? You know you’re on a new path, but would you like to know what exactly that path entails?” he asked, reaching a hand to sit on your shoulder, his palm burning hot against your skin.
Part of you wanted to know. Part of you didn’t. There was a fear, a simmering dread inside you that worried it was something you couldn’t fulfill, but then... if Lucifer himself is setting you on this path, then even he had every belief this was the correct one for you. And so, you nodded, ready for whatever the final card was.
The Ghoul flipped it at Lucifer’s command. The card showed a woman, sat and holding a book in dark robes. Either side of her sat two pillars; one black, one white. A moon sat at her feet, and atop her head was a headdress of the three lunar phases. The High Priestess.
You looked at the card, confused. You had expected something a bit more telling, but from the picture alone, you could gather nothing. Lucifer saw your confusion, and took your hand in his, holding it between both and forcing your attention to him.
“I’ll explain, don’t panic,” he smiled comfortingly. “The High Priestess... she hints at something hidden preparing to come forward. She advises you to have awareness around yourself, and your spirituality. Of the things around you. You’re ready to accept the important next stage of your life.”
You took a deep breath; all you could think of was that next stage with Terzo.
“There are things that would give away to someone in the know just exactly the bond you have with him...” Lucifer began, as if reading your mind again, “Did you notice when you first performed lust that he took his gloves off, my dear?”
You thought back, picturing when he’d made you bite the fingertip of it and drag it from his hand. You blushed at the memory, knowing the Dark One had seen everything. But now was not the time to get shy.
“He did that each time with you, did he not?” You nodded. “He isn’t supposed to. I warned him during his ascension, the Papas wear gloves for a reason. His contact, his touch, was saved for the only person it was ever meant for now that he was a Papa. And without even thinking about it, he took them off for you.”
The confusion in your mind swam; it had seemed so insignificant but when you thought back to catching him with Christine, as painful as that memory was, he had still been wearing his gloves then...
“Not to mention the removal of his paints, your second night together. A very similar meaning there; barefaced Papas are saved for those who truly see them. Do you comprehend what I’m saying, my child?” he asked, stroking his thumb over your cheek.
Truthfully, you didn’t. You were trying to piece it all together, searching the texts you’d studied as a younger sibling and trying to find what any of that meant other than the fact that there was a connection of some sort; a bond.
“The High Priestess is a figurehead of feminine power, my dear. The lunar cycles on her headdress represent the three stages of womanhood: maiden, mother, crone. She has appeared here, because she is showing you your feminine power. One that is hidden inside you, preparing to come forward.
“You are his; destined to be. Child, you are his Prime Mover.”
Your heart thudded in your chest. That term... you’d heard it before, many years ago. It was a destiny, a divine path for a woman meant to be at the side of a Papa. Not every Papa had one, and it was incredibly rare to find her at all. There hadn’t been another Prime Mover since the early 1800’s. The pull you felt towards Terzo, the almost instant connection and ferocity of your love after just a couple of weeks made sense now.
Prime Mover.
You were the feminine figurehead of the Satanic Church; Papa’s other half, his Queen, for lack of a better term. Your rightful place was at his side, leading in the name of Lilith herself. The power that was bestowed upon Terzo during his ascension was destined for you too.
“I-I... can’t be. I’m not cut out for that... responsibility,” you protested, shaking your head and removing your hand from Lucifer’s as the shock overcame you.
“I chose you for a reason, my dear. You are the one, because I know that you are cut out for this. Your devotion for the last sixteen years proves that to me, but I knew it the moment you were born. This is your birthright,” he explained, his expression more serious than you’d seen it before. “It’s coming, my dear, and you can’t stop it.”
Lucifer stood, towering above you now on his feet and stepped closer towards you.
“They’ll know as soon as they see you, my dear. The Emeritus line bears the mark of the Divine,” he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours gently in a kiss that felt otherworldly and yet, not in the slightest bit romantic. You closed your eyes, your head feeling light and airy as you melted into his kiss. And then, he stepped away, your eyes fluttering open.
“...And now, so do you.”
You looked at him in confusion, seeing him smirk at you and run his fingers down the left side of your face. He looked... proud? Admiring you for a moment too long.
“You need to go back, my child. You need to show them. I’ve enjoyed our little talk, but for the time being... you must go.”
You panicked, not ready to go back yet; what if you had questions? What if you needed His guidance again? You had no idea what to do from here. If anything, you were more confused now than when you entered this strange little void.
“W-wait, please... What if I have questions? I don’t know how to do this, Lucifer, please!” you begged, reaching for him. He held your hands and steadied you, his touch instantly soothing.
“Don’t panic. I will see you again soon. We’ll talk again, at your ascension. For now, just show them.”
“Show them what?” you cried, tears prickling at your eyes. Lucifer just smiled, stepping back from you and raising his hand. Before you knew it, his fingers snapped, and you were plunged into a black void.
Lucifer vanished, and the stool you sat on as well as his and the blackjack table disappeared and you fell, endless falling through nothing. Your limbs flailed and ballgown billowed as you fell into nothing, the weightless feeling terrifying you the longer you dropped.
Until finally, you hit the floor and your eyes shot open.
With a start, you awoke, desperately throwing your hands out to your sides for purchase. You gripped onto silk, looking beneath where you lay to see familiar purple and black bedding, and feeling a soft mattress under you.
“A-amore?” you heard his concerned voice from the corner of his room. He sat beneath the only light he had on; a small lamp stood next to him. You remained shrouded in mostly darkness, confusion sweeping over you until you settled on him.
“Terzo... what...?” you began, unable to finish the sentence as you looked around the room; a small part of you wished you’d seen Him. You weren’t done with your questions yet...
“You collapsed at the blackjack table, amore. But... no one could find anything the matter in the infirmary. You’ve been out for hours...” he stood, worried and careful, sitting at the edge of the bed and reaching for your hand that still gripped his sheets as if you would start falling again at any moment. You looked up at him then, finally seeing the worry lines etched into his paint. But when Terzo saw you, his expression changed from one of deep concern, to one of immense shock.
His jaw dropped, eyes widened and brow creasing. The hand on top of yours smacked over his mouth and he stood quickly, backing up until his back hit the full-length mirror in the far corner of the room.
“T-Terzo...? What’s happening?” you asked, fear spearing you through the chest.
“Y-you... your...” he couldn’t speak, his voice trembling as if in fear. He pointed instead, his gloved hand raising to your face.
The fear propelled you, forcing you up and off of Terzo’s bed to stomp towards him, fumbling with the skirt of your ballgown only to try to comfort him, calm him down but he moved out of your way just a step to the side and you were left staring at your own reflection.
Even in the dim light, you saw it. You couldn’t miss it.
Your left eye had turned almost completely white, save for the pupil, blown out in the centre. Lucifer had bestowed the Divine mark on you.
‘Show them’ he had said. He meant... show them your mark.
“T-Terzo... He did this. He came to me,” you panicked, reaching for him. He let you grab his arms, holding you too when he snapped himself from his initial shock. “He showed me m-my path... He told me that I’m-”
“Prime Mover...” Terzo finished your sentence. He knew what that mark meant for you. “You’re my... Prime Mover?” He asked, the words sounding more like a desperate gasp. You just nodded at him, your hands squeezing at his arms and tears spilling over your cheeks. You found yourself smiling – grinning, even.
“I’m yours; I was always supposed to be,” you laughed in shock, biting your lip to try and contain the wild grin as more tears fell.
Terzo couldn’t take his eyes off you, staring at the mark that held so much meaning that it was overwhelming. He brought his hands to your cheeks, holding you as you gripped his wrists.
“Supposed to be mine,” he breathed, his lips curling up at the edges as elation started to settle in, his panic and shock wearing off. “You’re... you’re mine, principessa?” You nodded frantically.
And Terzo couldn’t help but laugh. Out of relief, out of disbelief... he couldn’t tell but he knew he was overjoyed. Words failed him, and instead, he pulled you to smash his lips against yours in a bruising kiss. He had hoped after today you would remain together, of course, but this? He could never have predicted this, never seen this coming.
But now, everything made sense.
“Tell me, amore. Tell me everything He said to you, what did He show you?” He asked, pulling you back to the edge of his bed to sit and explain your vision. You told him about the blackjack, about how you’d completed the ritual, about the tarot cards. You told him each one’s significance in your past, present and future, and he gleamed at you the whole time, in awe.
“He told me to ‘show them’... I think He meant this?” You said, pointing at your eye. “I didn’t know... Not until I just saw. This is the Divine mark, isn’t it?” Terzo nodded, his thumb stroking over your cheekbone underneath it.
“And it looks so beautiful on you, amore,” he said dreamily, “my Prime Mover...” The happiness in his expression as he took in this news was evident, and it only made your heart swell.
“He said something about an ascension?” you mentioned, confused and hoping Terzo may have an answer for you.
“Sí, you will have one... We will need to prepare for it, of course, but that makes you... my equal. At least, in the Ministry hierarchy. I’m to believe that you are, in fact, worlds above me... But yes. You will ascend to Prime Mover with me, principessa.”
You couldn’t describe how you felt in that moment; an intoxicating cocktail of happiness, love, pride, and relief. Not only had you completed your ritual, but you had found your purpose. You had found your place in the ministry, in your life, in the world... and it was by Terzo’s side.
“We’ll share everything, cara mio. My role extends to you, and I can think of no one better to don my colours, to help lead this congregation, to help spread the word of our teachings and grow this church. Lucifer knew what he was doing when he picked you, that’s for certain,” he beamed, leaning into you to kiss you once again. He was so in awe of you, so in love with you, it was almost sickening.
“Lucky for me, purple is my colour,” you smirked as you sat back, hinting at Terzo’s papal colours and adoring the idea of sharing that with him, of matching with him.
“Oh, I remember. Vividly,” he smirked, his mind wandering back to that first time you had slept together. “Come, amore. People were worried for you, we thought you were sick. And Lucifer has asked you to show them your beautiful new mark, no?” he stood, pulling you to your feet with him and wrapping his arms around your waist. “I can’t wait to show Sister Imperator this...”
“Perhaps we show her first, hm?” you smiled wickedly, pulling him closer to you by the stole of his robes.
“Oh, principessa... It might just send her into a coma. Or worse...” he teased, his lips hovering close to yours.
“Here’s hoping...” you laughed evilly. Terzo threw his head back in a deep laugh, one that vibrated his whole chest.
“Oh, you are so my Prime Mover...” Terzo snickered, leaning in to engulf you in another breathtaking kiss; a final private moment together before he proudly paraded you back through the halls to anyone and everyone who had ever doubted him.
His pride and joy.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading all the way to the end of this fic. I'm so grateful, and truly I can't believe the amount of love on this. I'm in total awe, and I hope you'll join me for the next one...
Happy Halloween, Ghesties! 🎃
Prev: Day 6 - Greed
A huge thank you to @her-satanic-wiles for beta reading, and @adinferix for fine tuning the Italian translations! 🖤
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There's death at my door and I swear that it's following me
(ao3 link)
Summary:
“I’m going to finish it,” he says out loud to anyone who might be listening in his empty house. “I swear. I have to for school, anyway. I’m not handing in an unfinished paper.”
There is no response but the sound of Ponyboy’s own breathing.
“It’s not easy to write, Johnny!” he yells. “This is the part where I get you killed, you know!”
Nothing.
Figures he’d be quiet dead, too.
---
Neither of the greasers who died that cold, September night in 1967 had a funeral—Dally had nobody to set one up, except his friends who couldn’t afford it, and they never found out where the cops took him after they killed him anyway. But a month or so after everything ends, they find out Johnny’s mother had him cremated and that she and his father kept his ashes.
Ponyboy is particularly pissed off. Something about Johnny being trapped in that house his whole life, and even now, after death, being kept in a place he hated more than anything else…
“It ain’t right. I…we loved him more than they could ever dream of.”
As the remnants of the gang sit around the Curtises’ kitchen table, defeated, Two-Bit half-heartedly jokes they should steal his ashes. Darry rolls his eyes. Sodapop says that’s horrible. A heartbroken Ponyboy says, “Dally would’ve done it in a heartbeat.”
A week later Darry and Soda wake up to Pony making eggs for breakfast, with a new centerpiece on the table.
“Tell me that is not what I think it is,” Darry mutters, gesturing to the cheap urn.
Pony’s face goes red. “So, uh… this kid Mark at school taught me how to pick locks, and…”
“Ponyboy Michael Curtis!”
“C’mon, Darry, I had to! It was eating me alive. They don’t deserve him! I’ll bet they won’t even notice he’s gone!”
His brothers look at him like he’s finally lost it. Maybe he has, because Mark’s advice had gotten him nowhere, and Pony swears the Cades’ door unlocked on its own last night.
“All Johnny wanted was to get out of Tulsa. The happiest he ever was, was watchin’ the sunset back there on Jay Mountain. I needed to go get him so we could take him there.”
“Ponyboy…”
“I had to. I just had to. If not for Johnny, then for Dally, okay? ‘Cause god knows we couldn’t do anythin’ else for him.”
He’s got a lot of reasons to believe this is what Johnny wanted.
That weekend, the whole gang drives up to the remains of the church, so they all can say goodbye. Ponyboy pours Johnny’s ashes out over the cliffside where they watched the sunset, and if a little bit of dust gets on his hands, well. He stares for a minute before he goes to wash it off at the old water pump.
“You gotta go, Johnny,” he mumbles. “Don’t stick around me. Don’t do that to yourself. Move on.”
He’s always had a weird relationship with death.
---
Ever since Ponyboy was little, he’d been told he had a strong imagination. His brothers call him a dreamer. His dad used to laugh and say he had his head in the clouds; his Mom said he was just the creative type. He learned pretty fast that no one else saw the things he could see, and he learned even faster not to talk about it. He thinks his brothers never believed him, but they also never forgot.
It’s one of those things where Ponyboy doesn’t see things unless he needs to. He got real good at tuning out the supernatural at a very young age, and it’s not something that comes up in his life very often anyway; death may follow him wherever he goes, it may show up at his door but he does not let it in. He doesn’t know why he’s like this. It’s like there is just something special about him, something he figures he won’t understand until he is much, much older. Or maybe he never will, and he’s just crazy.
The first time death comes to visit, Ponyboy is not feeling well. It’s been a month, it’s almost Halloween, and it is the first time since Johnny and Dally died that he’s sick again. Pony’s got just a low-grade fever, but Darry lets him stay home because that’s for the best. He promises to work on his English assignment.
Darry and Soda head out to work with promises to check up on him during their lunch breaks. He picks up his notebook and flips through it, but he is at the part where he runs into the church to save those kids and he can’t bring himself to pick up the pencil and admit that it was his cigarette. His fault.
His pencil rolls over the edge of the desk. It clatters to the floor and Ponyboy reaches down to get it. When he sits up, Johnny’s ghost is staring at him, pointing at the blank page.
He blinks and he is alone again, but he can still feel the presence and knows deep down he isn’t. He sits back and groans. He can’t be normal for ten minutes?
“I’m going to finish it,” he says out loud to anyone who might be listening in his empty house. “I swear. I have to for school, anyway. I’m not handing in an unfinished paper.”
There is no response but the sound of Ponyboy’s own breathing.
“It’s not easy to write, Johnny!” he yells. “This is the part where I get you killed, you know!”
Nothing.
Figures he’d be quiet dead, too.
But writer’s block grabs him by the throat and doesn’t let go, so Ponyboy picks up his pencil again and begins to doodle on that blank page a picture of his current situation.
He falls asleep at his desk, and when his brothers come home, they find him there, snoring over a picture of himself at his desk, writing in his notebook while Johnny Cade stands watching over his shoulder like some kind of guardian angel.
---
Time passes and school starts up again, and around a year or so after the Windrixville nightmare, Ponyboy announces to his brothers that he’s going to some school dance with a couple of friends. He’s really non-committal about the whole thing, but Soda thinks it’s a good idea, and maybe Pony doesn’t really like the group of guys he’s going with but he knows he has to get out of his comfort zone and this is one way to do that. He promises to be back before curfew, so it’s not like he’ll have time to get into any trouble.
Apparently, his first mistake was one he’d made literal months ago, back in the spring—saying no to going out with Angela Shepard.
He knows it was shitty of him, the way he'd barely even acknowledged her presence after she waltzed up to him that day, but he also he knows it was never about him. It was her, expecting Pony to have her back whether or not he actually was interested in her, because that's just what Curtises and Shepards do.
But the day she approached him was—would've been—Johnny's seventeenth birthday. So, you know. There are a lot of reasons he'd turned her down.
And now here they are, in October of 1968, at this stupid school dance. Mark’s brother Bryon brought a date and Bryon never liked Ponyboy anyway, so he and Mark walked off together to let those two hang out, and then Mark wanted to go out to Terry’s car because he brought alcohol or something—Pony was not interested in drinking the slightest, but he followed anyway—and then his second mistake must’ve been simply being at the dance or something, he doesn’t actually know. He doesn’t think he spoke to Angela the whole time.
(Later Ponyboy finds out she was trying to piss off Bryon, who he later finds out is her ex. She was mad he'd brought a date, or something like that. He still doesn't really get the whole thing, and probably never will. If you ask him, Angela should've known better than to have taken it all personally when she'd known exactly what she was doing.)
They’re sitting on the hood of Mark’s friend Terry’s car and some guy walks up that Ponyboy has never seen before.
And the guy just swings at him! Of course he swung back!
Pony knows that he does not have a tough reputation, but he is one hell of a fighter—he may have gotten his ass kicked in the rumble but he also helped kick ass, and he’s been working out a bit with Darry so he can keep up with the track team, and he was briefly considered an accessory to murder, so clearly he can handle himself. Just ignore the fact he'd been drowning in the fountain for that whole thing. He figures Mark didn’t get the memo, because when the guy smashes a beer bottle to swing at Ponyboy’s head, his idiot friend decides to pick that moment to tell the other guy to relax.
Next thing Pony knows Mark’s on the ground bleeding and the school-sanctioned cop appointed to keep kids from killing each other at the dance grabs him to haul him away. Some job he’s doing.
He goes to get Mark’s brother, and he explains that the guy meant to hit him and not Mark, and Bryon says something about Angela Shepard but he doesn’t really explain. Pony decides he doesn't care. Mark groans and his eyes open, but it’s like he can’t see anything and Pony winces, because he knows all too well what is happening.
“What’s wrong with him?”
“Shock,” Ponyboy says, and he takes Dally’s old leather jacket off and throws it over the guy until the ambulance arrives and the EMTs take over. He’s careful not to let any blood get on it, though. It’s already been through enough.
Ponyboy thinks maybe he has, too.
The brothers get into the ambulance and Cathy Carlson, the girl that Bryon took to the dance, walks up to him and asks what happened, so he tells her. She mentions that Bryon borrowed a friend’s car to drive them there—Two-Bit drove Ponyboy to the dance and then ditched him for the first girl he saw at the party, and must be long gone by now—and she points it out to him in the parking lot. She heads off to see if she can get a ride to the hospital from someone.
Ponyboy wants to thank Mark for stopping the fight, if he can. He’s not as bad as everyone thinks he is; Pony’s got no clue why Dally used to be so insistent he stay away from the kid. He also kind of figured Bryon would need a way home too, so…
He hotwires the car. He hopes he didn’t break anything in the process, and he makes sure to have Cathy drive, because she has a license and Darry won’t let anyone but himself teach Pony—and he won’t do it until Pony’s sixteen. Probably for the best considering Soda and Steve have a million speeding tickets each and Two-Bit is chronically under the influence.
When they leave, Ponyboy and Bryon have to help Mark walk out because he can’t on his own just yet. Pony’s in the middle of saying he gets it, “I had this killer concussion last year after some soc kicked me in the head during the big rumble, and I remember bein’ out of my mind loopy after, laughin’ at how I couldn’t run… straight…”
He trails off.
He realizes he recognizes this hallway. The door across from him is slightly open and it is the room Johnny died in.
Mark half-falls ‘cause Bryon kept walking and Pony didn’t, and it takes Cathy asking if he is okay to snap him out of it. He says yes but his chest is starting to feel tight and his eyes burn.
He blinks a few times and shakes his head and mumbles a “sorry,” which just gets him an odd look, but no one really asks after that. They get Mark in the car and the only thing he says for the entire ride home are the directions to his house.
Except they don’t get all the way to his house, because they are driving down the street Dallas Winston died on and the pain in Pony’s chest gets worse and he looks out the window toward the street lamp and yells “STOP!” because he sees someone standing there and is convinced they are about to hit them.
Everyone stares at Ponyboy like he is insane but he does not care because Dally is crumpling to the ground just like he did that night, calling out Pony’s name and dropping dead. Then he is standing up, and the bullets are hitting him, and it repeats and repeats like some horrible loop. Pony feels like all his hair is standing on end. He can’t breathe.
Don’t think about how you heard Dally and Johnny’s last words, how they called for you, but you’ll never know Mom and Dad’s. If they screamed for help. If they held each other as they died. If they watched the train coming and knew they couldn't run.
“Uh, I forgot to tell y’all a turn, I… I’ll get out here. Thanks for the ride.”
He doesn’t wait for a response before he gets out of the car and shuts the door. Cathy’s got the window down and she asks if he’s okay and Pony is normally a good liar but he isn’t tonight.
“I’ll be fine. See you later.”
They drive off and Ponyboy sits down on the curb and stares at his hands. He’s never hanging out with any of them ever again.
He thinks about his dreams, the horrible ones that wake him up screaming and shaking, the ones he can’t ever remember, and he wonders why he had to be the one cursed with this stupid ability. To know something horrible is going to happen before it does. To see what happened to his friends after death. Why he has to be the one to know Dallas Winston will never move on. He has this feeling in his gut and he knows he needs to walk down this road to get home but he cannot bring himself to go anywhere near that street lamp. He already has Johnny’s spirit attached to him. He can’t deal with the idea of Dally being there too. He is too angry, and even from this distance, it’s starting to affect Pony, too.
He takes the long way home, because maybe he has a jacket tonight but he figures that if he’s going to get jumped tonight for walking home alone, what’s the worst that could happen after last time? He’s already lost two friends. He lost his parents. Who even cares anymore?
When Ponyboy gets back to his house it is well after curfew and he can see the light on inside and it is like deja vu. He has a black eye and his lip is cut, he knows it’s swelling up because he never put ice on it, and his chest feels tight and he knows he’s shed a few tears and he just. He can’t even bring himself to care as he walks inside.
“You’re late again,” Darry says. Soda is nowhere to be seen.
“Yeah, whatever, Darrel,” Pony mutters.
“Where were you? I told you to be home by midnight. What happened to your face?”
“Some guy swung at me. Don’t worry about it.”
“You really think I won’t, Pony? We’ve talked about this.”
That is a lie. They didn’t talk. They just promised Soda not to fight anymore.
But Pony is tired and Dally and his heart hurts and he feels like he is going to explode, so he does.
“I was at the hospital, Darry, is that what you want? My friend got hurt trying to help me out because some guy I ain’t never seen in my life decided to swing at me at the dance even though I didn’t even do anything and I went to the hospital to check on Mark. And you know what? I had it all under control and then I hadda walk past that stupid room Johnny died in and now I know my brain is broken ‘cause I can’t stop thinking about it and about Dally and— and I don’t want to talk about it!” Ponyboy can’t even finish. He just storms past his brother and down the hall to his room.
He opens the door, grabs Sodapop out of the bed and shoves him out, and then slams the door shut behind him. The doorknob clicks locked and they hear a noise that sounds an awful lot like a heartbroken sob.
Soda looks at Darry.
“I told you waiting up for him would just piss him off.”
“Shut up.”
#ponyboy curtis#sodapop curtis#darry curtis#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#the outsiders fanfiction#johnny cade#dally winston#that was then this is now#two bit mathews#twttin#mark jennings#angela shepard#my post#julie writes stuff#if there’s one thing about me it’s I’m gonna imply dally and mark are brothers lmao#tex this one’s for you little buddy
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BotW Link x Lynel Hunter! Reader
I think we as a community are sleeping on the fact that BotW is a post-apocalypse. The settlements are few and far-between, most NPCs we meet on the road are being attacked by monsters, and more than one quest is a villager asking for help because they can’t deal with Calamity Ganon’s forces. So, what if Reader had to grow up in that world? How would they deal with the horrors? TW: mentions of death and disease, canon-typical violence
The world was broken. It had been broken long before you had been born. The dark clouds hanging over Hyrule Castle, the wandering machines, the monsters– all merely symptoms of the sickness plaguing the land. The elderly would occasionally tell you of a time before. When there was a princess and a knight. Champions to watch over the people.
Whoever they were, they had failed.
Growing up, your little town was relatively safe. Monsters didn’t venture too close, but they were always too close for comfort. The forest just below your village was home to more than a few Bokoblins and Moblins, not to mention the giant structure some other monsters had cobbled together just over the horizon. It was almost comical, how much their little fort looked like a tree house. But they were not to be trifled with.
Then the clouds over the castle got darker… and the monsters more numerous. Your quaint little village became less and less safe. Traveling to the next village over, which used to be relatively safe, if a bit stressful, was practically a suicide mission now. It would have been okay, you think, if nothing else had happened.
But then people got sick.
Really sick.
Maybe it was another curse of the land. Maybe it was punishment from the goddesses. Whatever the case, people were dying. You were lucky; you were still young when you got sick. A few weeks of shivering, coughing, sweating, and crying later, and you had the strength to get out of bed. Your parents weren’t as lucky. You took care of them as best as you could, but you could still hardly reach the stove to boil water for dinner.
You still aren’t sure which was worse: burying them that spring, or waiting all winter for the ground to thaw.
The rest of the adults fared about as well. Eventually, the sickness burned itself out. Nobody left to infect. Over the course of a year, you had become a village of orphans. The children who survived were weak, but did their best to put the pieces back together. But it quickly became apparent you didn’t have enough supplies. The gardens had been planted too late. The monsters were getting closer.
With no other options, you hugged your friends goodbye and set out on the road, praying to the merciless goddess that you would make it to the next village. That was years ago.
You snapped out of your own thoughts, focusing instead on the task at hand: the hulking beast that had been threatening the local Zora. The damned thing had electric arrows. It was almost like the beast had been perfectly selected to threaten the city below.
No time to think about what kind of divine wrath had placed it here. It swung its sword, and you jumped out of the way just in time. It swung again and you flipped over the blade. The monster roared, its mouth beginning to glow with flame.
Perfect.
You quickly take out your bow, firing an arrow directly at the thing’s face. It slumped forward, temporarily stunned. You ran forward, plunging your blade into its head. The creature let out a horrible death cry before collapsing into a pile of black goop and purple smoke.
“Stay dead, you stupid Lynel.” You kick the last of the black sludge, scattering it in the grass. You know it’s unlikely. It’s only a matter of time before another Blood Moon brings it back. But for now, the Zora should be safe.
You start walking back down the mountain, pulling your hood closer to shield from the pouring rain, but it’s no use. Vah Ruta’s rain was inescapable. You watch your footing as you walk, the muddy ground slippery beneath your feet. Perhaps it would be best to stay the night at the inn in Zora’s domain.
Glancing up, you’re surprised to see another Hylian. His armor makes him look like a Zora. He seems equally surprised to see you. You suppose you are covered in Lynel guts. You give him a polite wave, making a mental note to bathe before checking into the inn. He gives a hesitant wave back. You turn, continuing your path down the mountain.
At the inn, you hear the Zoras excitedly gossiping. Apparently, the centuries-dead princess’ lover had returned. Thinking nothing of it, you pay for a bed and set out at first light. Curiously, there was no rain that day.
The next time you see him is a few weeks later. You had been tracking a Lynel, this time near the base of Mount Lanayru. It manages to get a few good hits on you before you take it down. As you patch yourself up, making sure to stay out of sight of the Lizalfos in the area, you feel the ground beneath you shake. Looking at the mountain, darkness seems to erupt from it, spewing down the sides and straight towards your location. As it nears, you realize it’s not darkness– it’s a dragon, flying down the mountain at breakneck speeds. It’s covered in slime and eyeballs. You watch as the young man, around your age, dives off a nearby cliff and takes aim, hitting the goop. The dragon flies back up the mountain, and he lands near where you sit. Well, land is a strong word. He folds up his paraglider and just kind of.. faceplants into the dirt.
He looks at you. He looks at the Lynel bits still covering the ground. He looks back at you. You raise an eyebrow at him. Looking at him now, you can see his face and arms are covered in scars. Well, maybe scars wasn’t the right word. It looked like half his body had been burnt by a guardian laser and healed. His clothes were absolutely filthy, to say nothing of the smell.
He looks like he’s about to say something, but the dragon roars, snapping his attention back to it. He sprints after the beast, trying to hit the goop with an arrow once again. You decide to leave the dragon to the professional(?) and begin the long hike to the nearest village. If you hurry, you might make it before dark.
Hateno was surprisingly nice. The dye shop guy was… a bit strange. And apparently there was a mad scientist living up the hill. But other than that, it was nice. It almost made you wish you could stay. But you had things to do.
“Two arrow bundles, please.” You tell the shopkeeper. As you pack them in your bag, you hear the door behind you open. The shopkeeper greets the new customer. You look up. It’s the crazy guy that fought the dragon. He was sporting multiple new bruises and cuts across his face and arms. Before you can think, you blurt out “Dude, what happened to you?”
“Uhhh, sledding accident?” The blond scratches the back of his head nervously.
“Oh, that’s our Link!” The shopkeeper laughs, bundling up the newcomer's purchase and handing it to the boy. “He goes away for weeks at a time and comes back with the craziest stories. Did you know he’s gone to Hyrule Field?”
“Isn’t that place a death trap? There’s guardians everywhere.” You look at this ‘Link’ guy. He looks like he weighs four pounds soaking wet with shoes on. Definitely not someone you would imagine taking on a guardian. Then again, he apparently survived his encounter with the dragon on Lanayru.
“I mean, it was a bit tricky. But once you have the right equipment, it’s pretty easy to reflect the lasers back at them.” He smiles awkwardly under your gaze.
“Reflect the lasers back at them?” You cross your arms, unconvinced. “They break most shields in one hit. Two if you’re lucky. What kind of equipment could you possibly have to deal with them?”
“Just my shield.” Link looks puzzled. “I got it from inside the castle. Maybe it’s made better than the shields you’ve been using?”
“I’m sorry you went INSIDE the castle?” You scoff. “Nobody goes in there and makes it out. Hardly anyone even makes it to the gate.”
“Well, I did.”
“I’ll believe it when I see it.” You roll your eyes. This guy sure was full of it. Sure, he had shot a dragon. But there was no way he had been inside the castle. The darkness inside. The monsters roaming everywhere. It was simply impossible.
“Fine.” Link suddenly grabs your arm, clearly annoyed. You don’t even have time to react as he pulls a device from his hip and hits the surface. You see a light surround you and suddenly you’re standing on a circular platform. There’s some sort of structure behind you. But that’s not what has your attention. The field in front of you, dotted with small patches of trees…
“What the HECK?” You exclaim, twisting out of his grip. “How are we at Hyrule Field? It’s days away from Hateno!”
“Magic?” He shrugs, and you can feel your blood pressure rising. “Anyway, wait here. I can take you back after I show you.” He takes off sprinting into the field.
“What the– ARE YOU INSANE!?” You yell, but he’s long gone. You watch where he disappeared for a few moments. Did he just leave you here? Okay, surely there wouldn’t be too many guardians between here and the road. There were enough trees you could hide behind, if need be. Just as you’re about to walk away, you see Link sprint out of the tree line.
With a guardian hot on his tail.
He waves excitedly at you as the machine powers up its laser. Welp, that settles it. This guy is clinically insane. Carrying his corpse back to Hateno would be impractical, but the village would surely appreciate some memento. Maybe after the guardian leaves you can take his sword? Or that tablet he had at his hip? You watch as the guardian fires at him. He holds up his shield… and the laser bounces off, hitting the ground a few feet away from you. The guardian fires again, and this time Link swings out his arm as the laser connects with the shield. The robot explodes.
“See!” Link runs over to you, ignoring the pile of guardian pieces. “Believe me now?”
Your jaw is still on the floor. Snapping your mouth closed, it takes a moment for you to process what you just saw. He killed a guardian. He killed a GUARDIAN. Which means he wasn’t lying about going inside the castle.
“You’re insane.” You laugh, finally able to speak. “How are you not dead, yet?”
“What can I say? I’m simply that good.” He puffs his chest out, clearly proud at proving his abilities to you.
“I saw you faceplant while fighting that dragon.” You giggle as his shoulders droop.
“Right. You saw that.” Blush creeps up his cheeks, dusting them a very cute shade of pink. Suddenly, he gets a confused look on his face. “Wait. What were you doing there?”
“There’s a Lynel that lives near the base of the mountain.” You shrug, as if that’s an explanation. Link waits for you to say more, but you don’t. Instead, you start walking southwest. You’ve got a vague idea of where you are, and you have a job to do.
“W-wait!” He yelps. When you don’t stop walking he falls in step beside you. “I can take you back to Hateno. You don’t have to walk.”
“Nah.” You wave your hand. “I’ve actually got stuff to do in the area. You saved me some travel time with your… whatever that was.”
“Like what?” He tilts his head, curious.
“Like that.” You stop walking. In front of you is a bridge, and beyond that, a giant colosseum. The walls are half-collapsed, and a black goopy substance clings to parts of the exterior.
“You’re not going in there, are you?” He looks worried.
“Of course I am.” You drop your bag, knowing it would slow you down too much.
“Umm, I would advise against that? There’s a bunch of monsters inside, and I’m not saying you can’t handle yourself, but it’s just that-” You ignore him and walk into the arena. The Lynel notices you almost immediately and brings its weapon down on the ground, sending a shockwave out in all directions. You backflip out of its range just in time, knocking an arrow as you do so. Before you land, you fire, hitting the beast directly in the face. It roars and rushes towards you, but you step out of the way just in time. You can feel yourself falling into the familiar patterns. Dodge. Strike. Parry.
The beast falls without much fanfare. It simply dissolves into darkness, like all the others do. You turn to collect your bag, and see Link, his mouth hanging open like a fish.
“You can close your mouth, pretty boy.” You chuckle as he snaps his jaw shut. “Why do you look so surprised? You killed a guardian not even ten minutes ago.”
“That was awesome.” He has stars in his eyes. You walk down the road and he follows behind you. “How did you learn to do that?”
“I’ve been doing it for years. Just trial and error. And a lot of healing potions.”
“Years?” He seems surprised. “You can’t be much older than me.”
“What is this? An interrogation?” You roll your eyes.
“Sorry. It’s just–” he pauses, and you can see the blush creep back up his cheeks. “I’ve hardly seen anyone on the roads. And when they do travel, half the time I have to save them from Bokoblins. And you handled that Lynel like it was nothing.”
“Yeah, most people don’t travel, genius.” You wave your hand dismissively. “Too many monsters nowadays. Have you been living under a rock or something?”
“Uhh, not necessarily.” He looks confused. “Maybe? Technically?”
“Do you really not know?” You look him over. He seems well-traveled, if a bit dirty.
“Know what?”
“Dude, where have you been in the past couple of years?” You turn around, pointing towards the castle as you walk backwards. “Couple years ago, the clouds around the castle started growing. The elders all told us it was a bad omen. Course, nobody paid attention until the monsters started multiplying. The towns got less safe. And Blood Moons started happening.”
“Oh. It hasn’t always been like this?”
“Nah. When I was a kid traveling between towns was relatively safe.” You turn back around and look towards the setting sun. Crap. You hadn’t realized how late it was getting. You weren’t going to make it to the stable in time.
“So the monsters are getting stronger?” Link glances back at the castle. There’s something in his gaze you can’t quite decipher.
“Yeah. And bolder. Used to be they wouldn’t get too close to settlements. Now they’ll set up camp within sight of village gates.” You shrug.
“Then why were you going after Lynels? They don’t go near towns. I’ve only ever seen them in the wild.”
“Those places weren’t always in the middle of nowhere. Lynels are super territorial. If their numbers aren’t controlled, they’ll fight over territory and drive each other closer to villages.” You veer off the path, deciding this patch of trees would be good enough to rest by. The skeletons that rose from the ground were too much of a hassle to deal with. And you were tired.
“Why did you start hunting monsters, though?” He follows you into the small forest.
“Why do you ask so many questions?”
“Sorry.”
“My turn.” You sit cross legged on the ground, leaning your head against your arm. “How come you didn’t know the monsters were getting worse? You from overseas or something?”
“No. I’m from Hyrule.” He puts up his hands defensively. “I’ve just been in a coma for… a while.”
“Coma? Dang.” You pull some food out of your bag and offer some to him. He takes it. “Well, I’m not sure how things were before you went under, but now we have a little something called personal hygiene. You should try it out sometime.”
You laugh and he looks down at his clothes, as if only now realizing how filthy they are. He raises his arm and sniffs.
“I don’t smell that bad, do I?” he asks.
“Like an Octorok ate you and spit you out.”
“Aw, man.” His shoulders slump, and you have to suppress a giggle.
“Don’t worry, man. It’s nothing some soap and water can’t fix.” You smirk and take a bite of your food. It’s not the greatest, but it’s one of the few foods that travel well.
“I guess. I’ve been so busy I guess I hadn’t noticed.” He grimaces and takes a bite of his own portion. His frown deepens, but if he has an issue with your food he doesn’t say anything.
“Busy with what?” You ask. “Fighting dragons?”
“I was freeing that dragon, thank you very much.”
“Freeing it from what? This life?”
“No!” Link crosses his arms. “I was shooting Ganon’s Malice off it. Now it’s free and can fly around, just like Dinarri and Farosh!”
“Ganon? Don’t tell me you believe those fairy tales.” You snicker. He doesn’t seem to find it funny.
“Fairy tales?” He looks offended. “Calamity Ganon is in the castle right now! Zelda’s been sealing him for the last century!”
“Sure. And Santa comes down your chimney each year.” You scoff.
“How can you not believe me? There are still people alive who remember the calamity!” He’s yelling now. He sure did take it personally.
“Those are just stories grandparents tell kids to get them to behave.” You make your hands into claws, as if telling a spooky story. “You know, ‘Ooh you better eat your vegetables or else Ganon will get you!’”
“What about the champions? Don’t tell me you think they’re fake, too!”
“Of course they existed. I’ve been around Zora’s domain. I know their princess died in Vah Ruta or whatever.” You shrug. “The royal family lost control of their robots and tons of people died. The champions failed to protect their people and perished like almost everyone else. But that’s history.”
“DON’T TALK ABOUT THEM LIKE THAT!” Link slams his hands down and lean towards you threateningly. You lean away, shocked by his outburst. His expression softens as he backs away. His next words are whispered, almost too quiet to hear. “They were heroes. They gave their lives to stop Calamity Ganon. We never could have predicted he would take control of the divine beasts and guardians.” He pushes the bangs out of his face, ruffling his hair in the process.
“I’m sorry ‘we’???” You’re not sure what he’s on about.
Link doesn’t look at you. His bangs fall back in his face, covering his eyes. Without meeting your gaze, he unsheathes his sword.
“Is that–?” You don’t finish your question. The sword has a faint glow, but you can also feel the pure power radiating off of it. There’s only one sword that could be. But that was just a story. A myth that came about after the world fell apart 100 years ago. Surely, this was a trick. Or a strange coincidence?
No. Don’t be foolish. The proof was right in front of you.
Link swings the sword around, putting it back in its sheath. He stands up without another word.
“Hey-!” You jump up. He starts walking away, back to the road, and you need to jog to catch up to him. “Wait up! You can’t just drop that info and leave!”
“I’ve got stuff to do.” He says coldly.
“Yeah, no shit!” You can’t believe it. This was the hero everyone said had failed 100 years ago? Where had he been all this time? Why wasn’t he vanquishing evil or whatever? “If you’re the hero, castle’s in the other direction, my guy! Rescue the princess or whatever and the monster problems we’ve been dealing with will clear up.”
“It’s not that simple.” His hands ball into fists.
“Uhh, pretty sure that blade’s supposed to defeat Calamity Ganon. Go in. Slice his face. Problem solved.”
“I can’t do that yet.” He groans.
“Why not? You’ve got the sword. I saw you fight a dragon and a guardian.” You motion towards the place he had fought the guardian. It’s out of sight now, a few hills between you and the fallen machine, but your point still stands.
“I died! Okay?” Link points to the great plateau. Its cliffs cast a dark shadow in the moonlight. “I spent a century in the Shrine of Resurrection recovering from my last fight against Calamity Ganon. I still haven’t recovered all of my missing memories from before! Without the Divine Beasts, there’s no way I’m winning.”
“Is that what you were doing at Zora’s domain the first time I saw you?” You gasp. “You’re the reason Vah Ruta stopped spouting water everywhere!”
“Yes? Now if you’ll excuse me, I have two more Divine Beasts to free.” He walks faster down the road, trying to put distance between you two. You match his pace.
“You’ll be going after Vah Naboris, right? The Gerudo Desert is this way.” He doesn’t respond. You keep talking. “I don’t usually go into the desert, but some of the Gerudo keep me updated on the Lynels living in the mountains over there. Vah Naboris has been kicking up a sandstorm. With lightning. The only way to get close to it would be to use the Gerudo chief’s lightning-proof hat.”
“Great. I’ll do that.”
“You’ll be turned away at the gate. Gerudo only let women in their city.” You smile smugly. “Let me help.”
“What? Why would I want your help?” Link side-eyes you. “You called my friends and me failures.”
“Yeah, sorry about that.” You wince. “But what you’re doing is going to save Hyrule. No more Blood Moons. No more monster attacks. Let me help.”
He’s silent for a long time. You continue walking with him. Then, he smiles. He’s not quite sure why, but you remind him of someone.
“Goddesses, you’re stubborn. Fine.”
#botw x reader#link x reader#botw link x reader#botw#loz botw#botw link#legend of zelda#linked universe#linked universe x reader#linked universe + reader#lu wild#lu wild x reader#death#disease#tw death#tw violence#tw disease
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i get bummed out thinking about the decade or so between the late 90s and the late 2000s where there were dozens of different sites for hosting music which have all mostly crumbled and the music lost with them. songs i downloaded from soundclick or myspace, or some random server from a forum post, which i can still hear snippets of in my head but which literally Do Not Exist online anymore in any format
about ten years ago i tried tracking down a song from around 2005 called How Long Will I Wait For You ("you bring me down so much and i always lose") and could only find passing mention of it in old forums. archived posts, inactive accounts, dead links. now the forums don't even exist anymore and the search engines don't return any results at all.
someone somewhere in the world will have that song on a CD or on their old hard drive. someone somewhere wrote and recorded it. or maybe they don't. maybe no one saved a copy anywhere, and the person who wrote it is gone now, and the only way it exists at all is a faint memory of the chorus in my head and the way it made me feel.
it's the same story for millions of other songs, stories, art, videos. one day youtube will start deleting old videos, spotify will delete old songs, and then one day those libraries will shut down altogether and so much will be lost, some of it forever.
anyway. everything is feeling transient today. pour one out for that artwork you found that one time and could never find again
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