#And Kevin had coached them for the past year so you know this man was a stupid hero in their minds

[bookburners]

I don’t think the upperclassmen see Neil as sad and traumatized as much as they see him as a feral but deadly cat or chihuahua that they fed a couple times and is now theirs forever.

[otdiaftg]

The King's Men - Chapter Three

Day: Thursday, January 4th Time: 7:40 PM EST

Wymack pounded on the wall, calling a pause to the scrimmage, as Neil headed for the door. Neil let himself onto the court and headed for the goal. Andrew slung his racquet across his shoulders at Neil's approach. Neil knew better than to call Andrew out with an audience, so he stopped as close to Andrew as he could and kept his voice down. "Coach wants to know what you have against the offense line." Andrew slid a look past Neil to the court wall. "He can ask me himself." "Or you can answer me since I'm already here," Neil said. "There are only nine of us left. If we lose anyone else we're out of spring championships. You know that." Neil waited a beat, but of course that wasn't enough to get a reaction. Andrew looked bored of this conversation already. Neil put a hand up in front of Andrew's face, neatly blocking his view of Wymack, and waited until Andrew looked at him again. "I want us to get to finals. I want us to be the ones who finally bring the Ravens down. After everything Riko's done to us, don't you want that, too?" "You say 'want' so freely," Andrew said, "when I have told you a thousand times before I want nothing." "Probably because you're spending all your energy on not wanting anything," Neil shot back. "But if you can't grasp that simple concept, I'll put this in terms you do understand: this is a game we can't afford to lose. This is how we get to Riko. This is the only thing we can take from him that will actually hurt. Let's rip his rank out of his fingers and show him he had a reason to fear us all along." "Do your teammates still think you're the quiet one?" Andrew asked. "Our teammates," Neil said, with emphasis, "want this as much as I do. Stop cutting them off at the knees before they have the chance to try." "I don't believe in giving people chances." "I didn't until I came here," Neil said. "I took a chance on you when I decided to stay. You took a chance on me when you trusted me with Kevin. Is it really that hard to support them when they've been with you every step of the way?" "What will you give me in exchange for my cooperation?" Andrew asked. "Because revenge isn't good enough?" Neil asked. "What would it take?" Andrew didn't have to think about it. "Show me your scars." It was not what Neil was expecting, which was probably why Andrew asked for it. Neil opened his mouth to protest, but the words died in his throat. Wymack and Abby had already seen them, and the Foxes knew they were there. He'd put Andrew's hand to his ruined skin back in November to earn Andrew's trust. Neil had promised Andrew the missing parts of his truth if they survived the year. He hadn't thought Andrew would settle for a visual. "When?" he said at last. "We are going to Columbia tomorrow," Andrew said. "Now walk away and tell Coach to mind his pay grade. I will not let him get away with this a second time." Neil didn't understand, but he nodded and left.

Art used with permission by llstarvasterll. Thank you @llstarcasterll !

[eyes-of-mischief]

weekly fic recs | 46

fandoms: aftg, atla, dc, mdzs

aftg

raze it to the ground by ilgaksu

It stops being about Neil entirely, and it starts being about this: Andrew is really, really fucking tired.

Dead of Night by NikNak22

(explicit) (graphic depictions of violence, rape/non-con)

It’s Kevin’s senior year at PSU, and things are…okay. But that changes when a single question from a nosy reporter sends his life spiraling. The descent is slow and maddening – memories and trauma from his past weave together to form the image of the man that stands there today. As Kevin begins to look around him with a new and critical eye, though, he’s no longer sure that man is who he wants to be.

So the question is - when faced with the truth, is it a case of Kevin finally getting what he deserves? Or is it about time to prove a lot of people (including himself) wrong?

Aka the fic that’s all about Kevin Day.

Clickbait by Frostandcoal

It is fitting that Josten is set to don a Dragons’ uniform. Like his new mascot, Josten is a fire-breathing, relentless, somewhat mythical creature whose very existence seems larger than life. And Minyard is the perfect manifestation of a Cyclone; an inescapable, violent maelstrom of unpredictability, where your only chance of survival is to hunker down and wait out the storm.

What happens when a dragon battles a force of nature? That’s what we’re all waiting to find out.   The media reacts to teammates-turned-rivals in the summer before Neil Josten’s first year in the pro’s.

Latchkey Child by vicariously kingly (pelted)

(underage)

The segment’s title declared EXY’S DARLINGS - WHERE WILL THEY GO FROM HERE? in a yellow banner along the television screen's bottom. It was a spotlight feature on where Kevin Day and Riko Moriyama were planning to go after their high school graduation. Of course they were expected to join the best, but a few reporters speculated on favoritism from the Raven’s coach if they signed on at Edgar Allan, and if that’d impact the Exy prodigies’ relationships with their potential teammates.

Usually his mother would box his ears for looking at anything Exy-related, but he changed the channel long before her shower finished, the black ink on a younger Day’s cheekbone haunting him worse than the date in the corner.

( Neil wakes up seven years younger, and, slowly, takes matters into his own hands. )

atla

While Mighty Oaks Do Fall by WitchofEndor

High Sage Kenji blesses Fire Prince Zuko with the resilience of the reed, who bends in the wind and never breaks. When he is done, Fire Prince Ozai narrows his eyes, seemingly displeased by this blessing. But Kenji does not speak for himself; he is only a vessel. 

-

The newly-crowned Fire Lord Ozai offers his firstborn son to service in the temple.

This turns out to be a catastrophic mistake.

rabbitbrush by curiositykilled

There’s the sound of Katara groaning and Toph thumping Sokka with a rock, but Zuko’s chest is tight and cold. He can’t laugh at Sokka’s pun. He has to swallow to speak.

“Azula’s not going to prison.”

dc

An Internal Affair by nirejseki, robininthelabyrinth (nirejseki)

Leonard Snart, the CCPD Captain of Internal Affairs, is known as Captain Cold for a very good reason: He hates corrupt cops with a merciless vengeance, and once you're on his list, you're in serious trouble.

His next target?

A CCPD lab tech named Barry Allen who's developed a suspicious habit of disappearing at random intervals.

Family You Made (Go Back, Do it Again) by JUBE514

He’s nine again– nine and new and knows so many things now so rather than try to go back–

He thinks he has the chance to make things right.

The bright blue trainers he puts on are a pair he hasn’t worn in forever, something he never thought about after he grew out of them (will grow out of?) a year from now, and sets off into the night and into the rain.

The plan he has in his brain is not really a plan, moreso just a couple of half thrown ideas and maybe five steps into building back the life he had in the most painless way he could.

Maybe, he thinks, maybe this plan can start off with the family he misses– because he’s sixty and most of them too injured or too old or too dead–

Call him selfish but he misses them. He would rather find them than get himself back into that lonely existence he called a life before he woke up at nine.

Dick makes do because that’s all he can do really.

-

Dick gets sent back in time, but don't worry, he's got this. (Probably)

mdzs

Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller

He can’t get Jin Guangyao’s words out of his head.

If he’d only believed in Wei Wuxian, if he’d only been willing to stand up for him, could it all have been avoided?

Bend by ana_cp

(explicit)

Wei Ying does not have a crush on Lan Zhan anymore. Those feelings have been gone for a long time. He's over Lan Zhan. He is.

Deep down, he knows they'll never be compatible in a relationship. Even though Lan Zhan is gay. Even though Lan Zhan is also into BDSM. Because Lan Zhan is a Dom.

And so is he.

-

or, Wei Ying makes some very wrong assumptions about Lan Zhan's preferences, finds out just how far from the truth he is, and immediately makes a plan to fix it.

[simonsrosebud]

the one where someone doesn’t know who kevin day is, pt. 5

part one two three four

extra kalton content

games are over for the rest of the winter, and since winter break doesn’t officially start for another week it means that kevin spends most of his time at dalton’s apartment.

which, to be frank, isn’t any different than normal.

what is different, is that now kevin has much more free time to worry about meeting dalton’s family. how did he let himself get roped into staying there for a week?

oh right. because he’s trying to be a good boyfriend. and being a good boyfriend means doing this for dalton because it’s important to him. that’s probably why it’s stressing him out.

kevin flinches when a carrot hits his cheek. “come back to the present, will you?”

he drops his head back against the sofa. “sorry. i zoned out.”

and when dalton is dropping him off at his class for his first final of the semester, “are you okay?”

kevin shrugs. “i’m nervous about meeting your family.” he looks at dalton’s lap instead of his face.

dalton puts the car in park and leans over the center console to kiss his cheek. he stays there for a moment. “i know it won’t help to say there’s nothing to worry about, but it’s still true. they’ll love you because i love you.”

oh.

oh.

what?

“what?” kevin drags his stare up to dalton’s face. he’s smiling, he knows exactly what he’s done.

and dalton takes kevin’s face in his hands. “i love you. and i don’t expect you to say it back, and me saying it probably isn’t helping to make you less nervous, but thinking about me loving you is probably nicer than thinking about meeting my family.” he kisses kevin. “you gotta go, kev.”

kevin’s mouth is still hanging a little, and when he drags himself out of the car he leans into the open window. “you-you’re just gonna spring that on me and leave?”

“yep. and you’re going to think about it when you’re doubting yourself taking this exam.” he puts the car in drive, and blows him a dramatic kiss. “text me when you’re done?”

“no- i mean, yes, but-“

“good luck, love you!” and he drives off.

kevin watches his car until it turns the corner, and tugs at his hair before going inside.

he may have failed his exam, he may not have. he can’t really tell. either way, he lies a little to dalton when walking out. just got done, still have to wait for the class to end the exam before we can leave.

that kinda sucks. just txt me when ur done

kevin doesn’t know who to call, but his thumb eventually lands on abby.

“hey. are you okay? i feel like you never call me,” she laughs, and kevin grimaces. he should do it more often, then.

“i’m just stressed about something and… you’re the only person i thought to call.” he sits on a nearby bench outside his building. before abby can say anything he gets back to it. “dalton said i love you this morning and i don’t know what to do about it.”

“well, kevin, you don’t have to do anything about it. you can say it back? if you feel the same way?”

he does. he thinks. does he? is it just him thinking he should say it back because it’s the nice thing to do? he and thea never said it.

kevin shakes his head. his relationship with thea was toxic and a little fabricated.

kevin freezes. he’s never said i love you to someone and meant it. he takes a deep breath. he’s so fucked up. he knows he’s fucked up and it makes his head spin, but he can’t dwell on it because more of his reality would crash around him, and he’s already working through enough of it with bee behind the scenes.

“kevin?”

“i’m here. i don’t know if i feel the same, yet.”

“i know. you don’t have to say it. you can wait until you’re ready, or you don’t ever have to say it if you never feel it. he seems nice, i mean, i’d surely think that he’d be okay with you waiting?”

why did he call her? no one really knows his relationship but him.

he calls dalton. “i’m out, now. can you take me to the stadium?”

kevin shoots on an empty goal, hounding balls at cones for what’s probably close to two hours before the door opens.

wymack looks at him expectantly. “remember when betsy said you shouldn’t be spending more time here than necessary? like you did last year with the god-awful night practices?”

kevin plants the end of his racquet to the ground. “i had a lot on my mind.”

wymack retreats back through the hall. kevin follows. “should i be playing dad or coach right now?”

kevin doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to him saying things like that. about being his father. it’s not like he ever thought of him as just his coach, the day he found out that david wymack was his father that’s all he’s been able to think of him as in his head. the reality of it is just… different. shocking, even now.

“both?” wymack turns, an eyebrow raised. “dalton told me he loves me. i can’t say it back yet, so i don’t know what to say to him when i see him.”

he crosses his arms. “hey, dalton, you know i’m basically head over heels for you as anyone can tell, but i can’t say i love you yet because i’ve got shit up here that i need to settle first.” and after a moment. “too coach?

kevin shrugs. “it’s what i expected.”

it’s close enough to what he tells dalton, too. just without the head over heels and softer wording of “i’m fucked in the head”.

and he feels a little lighter when dalton kisses him and tells him it’s okay. “i told you you don’t have to say it. are you uncomfortable with me saying it again? do you want me to wait?”

and he doesn’t want to- or know how to say no, i need you to keep saying it until i believe you. i need you to keep saying it so i don’t forget. so that i know you mean it.

instead, he shrugs. he’s been shrugging so much lately. he’ll turn into neil. “i like hearing it.”

“kay.” dalton smiles. “i love you, then.”

he wasn’t planning on telling dalton anything past that, but then they start making out, and dalton lies him down, and he panics. “hey.” he says.

dalton has his lips on his neck. “hey.”

“no, hey, stop, d.” and he’s off of him quicker than he can comprehend.

“are you okay?”

“yeah,” he breathes. “no, i’m fine, i just…” he sits up. “i… can’t say i love you yet because i’ve never said it to anyone.”

“i’ve only been in two other real relationships before this, that’s okay-“

“no, i mean.” he sighs. “when i was... with the ravens, you know... saying i love you, or even like, oh love you man to a friend just... wasn’t something that-that we did. especially the way i was raised, i may have said it to a friend once or twice. but i don’t...” he looks up, and dalton feels pain in his chest from the pure vulnerability in his eyes. he slides his hands up gently to kevin’s face as he whispers, “i don’t think i’ve ever said i love you to anyone and meant it.”

“hey,” he whispers back. “that’s okay, kev. that’s okay.” he hugs him and kevin takes the biggest breath ever as he tucks his face into dalton’s shoulder.

and two weeks later, kevin’s standing on the porch of the miller family home in bowie, maryland.

he glances down at the address in his notes. this is the right one.

he should have let dalton pick him up from the airport. he knows he feels bad about it, but he didn’t want him to see how nervous he was.

he knocks on the door.

it opens after a few moments. a girl almost his height stands inside the door, and kevin panics. “hi.”

but she grins. “hi! you’re kevin! come in!” she steps back and it’s so fucking warm in the house compared to outside. “i’m so excited you’re here, dalton told us all about youuu” she coos as she leads him further into the house. dalton is shouting as he runs across the kitchen to turn down the stove to stop something from boiling over, and when he turns he grins.

“kevin!” he very obviously tries not to run over to hug him, and almost lifts kevin off his toes. “how long have you been here?” he whispers.

“twenty seconds.”

“oh good. okay. how was your flight?” he shrugs. “okay, cool, uh, let’s take your bag to my room.”

dalton kind of rushes them downstairs. his room and a spare bedroom are the only ones down there, and when he shuts the door behind them he takes a deep breath. “i’m sorry. i’m really nervous. my family’s kind of loud and my sisters are those people who just kind of act like they’ve known you for a while within five minutes of meeting you, so they probably won’t care to be weird in front of you. and my dad acts real tough and he’ll do the dad thing from movies and hammer you” kevin has no idea what he’s talking about. “um, and my sisters are annoying and if they bitch at each other just ignore it- it’s just what they do. and i just-”

“dalton it’s fine!” kevin shrugs out of his coat. “you forget i’ve lived with andrew, nicky, and neil. every awkward or tense moment is created because of them.”

he also knows how to school his expression in strange situations. again, he’s grown up in the spotlight.

so dalton leads him back upstairs where his mother is standing at the stove and his two sisters are at the table leaned close and whispering. they stop and both turn when the boys come up. “sorry, stole him for a second. um, mom, this is kevin.”

“oh, call me anne. it’s so nice to finally meet you! dalton’s told us plenty.”

“you as well. i’m just glad i was able to come out here this winter.” he’s got on his press smile on instinct. he’s so nervous, he feels like he’s sweating.

“i’m carmen, this is bella!” the girls wave from their spots at the table, and before he can say hello carmen speaks up again. he’s not complaining. “so you play exy? bella plays exy.” bella elbows her. “what!”

“i really don’t. i joined intramural at school so my friend wouldn’t be alone. i’m really bad.”

“not terrible, he could teach you some moves. he’s incredible.” now kevin shoots dalton a look. “what.”

“no, it’s okay, i mean i know who you are.” kevin’s stomach drops a little. “not like- i know that you’re famous for exy, i don’t like know you.”

kevin’s trying hard not to regret coming. why did he think he could act normal with someone else’s family?

but surprisingly, things smooth out after a few more minutes of painstaking conversation. granted, after kevin meets dalton’s father after comes home.

“kevin day. it’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.” he’s proud of his handshake, but mr. miller doesn’t pay it any mind.

“george. nice to meet you.” he nods, and grabs a bottle from the fridge. “beer? dalt, you get him a drink?”

kevin stiffens as he sits back at the table. “i don’t drink, sir.”

george frowns for a moment. he doesn’t remember how old dalton said he was. “you’re not underage, are you?” only three years younger, right?

“no, i just don’t drink.” anymore.

“fair enough.” he sits back at the table, and gestures towards his face. “see you’ve got a tattoo. why the face?”

“dad!” carmen is doing homework on her laptop, but looks up with a shocked look on her face. “don’t be rude,” she mumbles.

“i’m just asking!”

kevin honestly doesn’t know who to go by, but he feels his dad is the right route. “it’s a cover up. the one under it was a cocky premature thing with... uh, my, my-”

“his kind of brother.” kevin wishes carmen would butt out. but he has to play nice.

“oh! i’m sorry, i thought dalton said you were an only child.” and his dad actually seems sorry that he got his information wrong, despite it not even coming up yet, that kevin feels bad. he balls his fists under the table.

“we weren’t related. i just grew up with him. my family situation is... complicated.”

george holds his hands up after a speedy glancing at dalton. kevin thanks god for whatever face dalton must have made at him. “not my business to intrude. forget i asked about the face.”

and then things smooth out. they eat dinner, and kevin helps put dishes into the dishwasher to boost his morale with anne before joining dalton and his sisters in the living room. he sinks into the couch. dalton looks bored at what bella has on, the history channel, but kevin zones in on it. he tends to watch it a lot when andrew and neil aren’t there. or while he’s doing homework.

an hour in, both kevin and bella are enamored by whatever segment they’re playing. when dalton gets up to grab a drink, carmen smiles to herself and tosses a mini pretzel at bella, it lands on her sleeve, but she doesn’t notice.

she shakes her head. she does the same to kevin. it lands in his hood, and when he doesn’t move to take it out carmen leans forward.

dalton walks back in and lingers when he sees her. “you ever watch these two watch the history channel?” he frowns. what? “you could cut the sexual tension with a knife!”

bella snaps and kicks carmen. dalton rolls his eyes and sits with his head in kevin’s lap. carmen looks at him with a challenging brow. dalton isn’t going to let her win her little experiment.

he leans up and kisses kevin’s chin. “wanna go downstairs?”

kevin slides his hand into dalton’s hair, looks down at him for a moment. “soon. there’s still twenty minutes left.”

dalton’s jaw drops. carmen cackles.

at least he’s fitting in.

the rest of kevin’s trip to maryland at dalton’s family home are when they go to NYC for a day, and when he and dalton are just lounging around at the house and kevin says i love you

[falcqns]

Fame Dr: like what sort of things do you do, like acting/training for roles (like stunt training and stuff), photo shoots, premieres? How do you deal with the paparazzi? Do you ever get overwhelmed? I’m afraid I’ll find it super scary and not fun, I know I could script that stuff out but idk if I should

when it comes to training for roles, it just depends on the movie! here's my roles and what i did to prepare:

tv shows:

The Witcher S3: i did some sword training, and learned to ride a horse again (i used to be a horseback rider but havent ridden in years so it was nice to brush up on it!). i had a dialect coach as well as i needed a british accent lmao

The Orville New Horizons: no real training required, just read a few books that Seth recommended to me so i could understand what i was saying and met with Neil Degrasse Tyson with Seth as well and he answered any questions i had

Criminal Minds: nothing really, although i did take a refresher psych course, and met with a forensic psychologist and a profiler to interview them and get a taste for the work they had to do on a daily basis

Murdoch Mysteries: nothing! just team bonding really, which i did with all of them!

The Falcon and The Winter Soldier: not my first marvel project but i sustained an injury during The Witcher shoot so i had to rebuild by core muscles a little. i also read the comics about my character.

Movies:

We're The Millers: no prep i literally showed up and did what my mom told me to do lmao

Knives Out 2: team bonding which was scary and i had just come off of The Witcher shoot (literally less than 18 hours after wrapping) and was exhausted but we all went out and partied. other than that, i met with Rian and rewatched the first one

Batman v Superman: oh dear lord. i put myself through literal hell for this role but i dont regret it. i was eating as healthy as i could and working out every day, plus fight training, and taking extra ballet classes to make sure my body was in the best shape it could be (shit was rough) so i could do my own stunts. met with Zack Snyder and read all the comics Kara is in. I only met with Henry once as despite being in the same film, we were only in 2 scenes together, and one of them i didn't talk so we barely connected (he literally forgot that we were in the same movie and thought they'd recasted the original actor for Justice League the big dummy)

Mama Mia Here We Go Again: i took some refresher vocal lessons since i've only ever sang praise songs in church.

Mockinbird: my first marvel project and it literally knocked me on my ass. i thought the training for Batman v Superman was rough, it was nothing compared to this and the sheer amount of time and choreography that goes into a single fight scene oh my gosh. when i wasnt training, i was reading every single marvel comic that had my characters parents in it, and was meeting with illustrators and writers because my character wasn't in the comics, but was actually an original character that took over the internet bc of a fanfiction in 2012, and they decided to add her in lol so that meant making new comics that fit into the mcu timeline and giving my character a back story before the movies. i also met with so many marvel executives, was constantly doing interviews and meeting new people and trying to adjust to script changes practically hourly. i literally couldnt move or speak when i got a break from filming. i loved every second of it though!

Spiderman No Way Home: had just finished filming Man of Steel 2 so no training needed physically, but rewatched my past marvel projects and reread some comics that Kevin told me to to remind myself of the character

Enola Holmes 2: read the Enola Holmes book series and a few Sherlock books. i also watched Sherlock Holmes (the one w rachel mcadams as she played my character before i did) but thats about it. Henry actually remembered who i was and recommended me for the role

Secrets of Dumbledore: wand training! i took a beginners latin course to help with pronunciation at the request of JKR

Multiverse of Madness: no retraining, finished filming NWH and went into preproduction for MoM immediately

Drawing With Light: re read the book, met with the author, and met with my dialect coach again

They Both Die At The End: met with the author and reread the book!

and ngl, i despise photo shoots. i hate them with a passion, but i power through because i know they're important, but other than for promo, i don't do photo shoots which can sound weird considering im working on a makeup line with Sephora but i chose to have my siblings model it instead (with their consent of course).

and premieres can be fun if you make them fun! the red carpet usually lasts for an hour or two before the movie actually starts, and (at least for me) i only ever do between 3 and 5 interviews on the carpet because anything else overwhelms me and i'll shut down. i spend the rest of the time talking to fans and taking photos, and i'll go into the theatre early to give myself a noise and speaking break before the movie starts, and then the movie starts, and its so much different from a regular movie screening. everyone stays until the end credits, every one claps for everyone, and not a single person gets up during the movie (u didn't hear this from me but my mom wears depends for premieres just in case). the director and executives and producers usually talk to the audience and thank them and things, and sometimes it happens before and sometimes i happens after. just depends on the timing and the studio really!

i fucking hate paparazzi. i don't hate the people bc i know they're just doing their job, but i find it a tad ridiculous they have to approach me while shopping for pads and ask me how i feel about Pete Davidson and Kim Kardashian dating WHEN WE HAVENT BEEN TOGETHER FOR 3 FUCKIN YEARS. they can take photos of me all they want, i dont care. they can literally blast "ava aniston shops for period products at 3 am in dri fit shorts, puma socks, birkenstocks that are falling apart and a red henley that looks like it belongs to chris evans" all they want but to ask me about an ex's new relationship pisses me off and crosses a line. and dont get me started on the way they were when my grandma passed away because how dare i go get a coffee when i should be at home comforting my grieving mother 🙄

and i absolutely get overwhelmed. my dad has gone viral a few times because he doesnt hesitate to yell at the paparazzi when they cross a line or when he can tell i'm overstimulated. i'm very thankful that i have someone like my chrissy boy who can tell when i've had enough and am going to meltdown/shutdown and removes me from the situation (literally called his mom to come and get me in front of them because they all know not to mess w mama lisa and her babies)!

you can always script these things out, but i didnt, because it gives me a better appreciation for celebrities and the things they go through, and i personally think its a part of the experience. and messing with the press is kind of fun (in the middle of gaslighting them into thinking chris and i are married and we're having tons of fun with it) so just remember that its your dr and you can change whatever you want within reason!!

happy shifting and i hope this helps! <3

[jemej3m]

Yo. Yo. Yoo. A Highschool musical au. Yeah you heard me.

bruh cross clique relationships are my jam

pt. 1? maybe

*

When they’d first met, Neil had been hiding from everyone else on the roof of the ski lodge. Wymack had brought him on holiday and encouraged him to join in with the teen party going on in the karaoke lounge with Dan and Kevin, but he’d taken one look and noped the hell out. 

Curled into a ball, he had never expected his angsty teenage silence to be broken by another short, bad-mannered boy, equally as distasteful of loud gatherings and soda-stupid teenage shenanigans. 

There had been something very familiar about him, like Neil had seen him before.

He also had a pack of cigarettes. 

Neil had yearned for one, like he yearned for his mom, and Andrew had asked for his name in exchange for the lighter. They’d sat in silence, letting the dulled sounds of music and cheers wash over them like a particularly persistent draft.

When Neil flinched away at the first pop of the fireworks, Andrew had frowned. And when Neil had explained they sounded too much like gunshots, Andrew gave him his number, scoffing at Neil’s old flip phone. 

Then he’d proceeded to bitch about his cousin, the one who had dragged him and his twin brother on a ‘bonding’ trip, and was then forcing him to move across the country so they could all live together. it distracted Neil from the gunfire overhead: whether or not that had been Andrew’s intention, Neil thought he’d never know. 

He assumed he’d never see Andrew again. 

But then school started up again.

Guess who was the new kid?

*

Andrew didn’t think that high school movies were actually grounded in reality till he moved to Palmetto State high. But the minute that he walked in through Palmetto State High’s front doors, he was instantly proven wrong. 

Aaron, who had already done his freshman year and half his sophomore year here, seemed unfazed. He was a generally unfazed person, expect when Andrew purposefully ignored him and then smashed his ass at Mariokart. Then he’d lose his temper but ultimately be angrier at himself, because he didn’t want to be anything like his mom had been. 

Andrew never had the chance to meet Tilda. She’d died just before they met: her will was the only reason that Aaron had found out about Andrew in the first place.

Aaron shoved his glasses up his nose and neatly ducked past a set of boisterous jocks who were bouncing a basketball to one another. 

“I already hate it here,” Andrew muttered, following after his brother. 

“It gets worse,” Aaron sighed. “Wait till you see the Exy jocks. The cheerleaders are - ” his face screwed up for a second. “Not all bad.” 

“What are you?” 

“We,” Aaron insisted. “Are nerds. Did you think you’d be able to escape the fact that we’re identical?” 

“I’m not a nerd,” Andrew muttered, shoving his hands into his pockets to hide the bracelet he wore. Bee had given it to him as a parting gift: it was the solar system, to scale, with the space between the planets made out of carbon fibre. 

“Are you kidding? The only thing you moved in with was a box of books.” 

“Whatever.” 

They brushed by the office, Aaron ignoring the freshman’s offer to take Andrew on a tour of the school. Her name-tag read Robin and she was clearly unfazed by their complete disregard of her presence. 

“History first,” Aaron huffed, squinting at Andrew’s timetable. “Good, we’re together. History sucks: we have Mr Moriyama, and his shitty nephew Riko is in that class too.”

“What’s so shitty about him?” 

“You’ll see.” 

Fantastic, Andrew thought. The day was shaping up to be an absolute nightmare. 

“Mr Minyard,” drawled a nasally man who lingered by the door. When he saw Andrew, his eye twitched. “And Mr Minyard. So the attendance sheet wasn’t an error.”

Aaron just muttered something under his breath and dragged Andrew by the sleeve. The tables were set up in spaced-apart rows, but the back was already claimed by a group of delinquent-looking attention vacuums. The others were all crowded around one boy, who had his feet kicked up on the table in front of him and an uncanny resemblance to the history teacher. 

He looked between Andrew and Aaron and sneered. Before he could open his mouth to say something, his uncle clapped his hands and called the class to attention. 

Just as Mr Moriyama was about to start the lesson, what could only be described as the human embodiment of disaster. 

When Andrew recognised him, his cheeks went red. 

“Mr Josten,” Mr Moriyama said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “How is it that you are always late to my class, when your brother’s already here?” 

The brother in question looked nothing like Neil. He was taller, paler, with black hair and green eyes. He was also glaring at Neil, like that was going to make a difference. 

“My bad,” the red-head shrugged. 

“Detention,” Mr Moriyama said. 

“I have practise,” Neil retorted. And - oh, god, he was a jock. A smart-mouthed sporty boy. Fuck. Andrew thought he’d never see the boy from the rooftop again, but here they were, sitting in the same history class. 

“Should have thought about that before you were late,” the greasy man sneered, sending Neil on his way. Neil slumped his way past the desks till he saw Andrew sitting behind his brother, eyes widened with shock. 

Andrew, involuntarily, found himself giving Neil a small salute. Neil’s lips quirked up as he slid into his chair, letting the first lesson of the day finally begin. 

*

Neil jogged into practise late. This wasn’t surprising to anyone, least of all Wymack, who was leaning against the plexiglass with a knowing frown. 

“Could you stop antagonising Mr Moriyama’s own nephew in his class?” 

“In my defence,” Neil admitted. “Today’s detention was because I was late, not because I accidentally spoke my thought about Riko out loud instead of reciting them in my head.”

“Get on the court, you little shit,” he said, though not without fondness. Neil had been adopted by the Exy coach at the end of his freshman year, when he’d figured out why Neil was breaking into the changerooms to sleep. 

He jogged up to Kevin, who was less than impressed as he stood by the goal. 

“What the hell, Neil?” 

“The only reason I was so late was because Gordon still hasn’t forgiven you for getting him kicked off the team and he likes to hang around my locker to take it out on me!” 

Dan, Wymack’s other adopted child and team captain, was standing nearby and laughing. “Don’t try and flip this on Kevin: you just like picking fights with Seth.” 

Neil grinned at her. “It’s so easy.” 

“Oi!” Wymack called out. “We running drills or not?”

When he saw the blonde head of hair bobbing up and down, Neil’s grin faltered slightly. He was still in shock that Aaron had a twin, that the twin had moved here, and that twin had been the exact person Neil had met on the roof of the ski resort a few weeks ago. 

No wonder he’d found Andrew’s face so familiar. He was truly an idiot for not picking up on it.

Andrew sat down, high in the bleachers. Neil felt a strange prickle at the back of his neck, like he had when they’d talked for hours up on the roof. 

Practise went too fast after that. Neil stayed behind to help his coach pack up, Kevin and Dan bickering about plays as they went off to the showers. 

Coach went off with the equipment, giving Andrew a cursory glance. Perhaps he recognised Aaron’s face: the boy had nearly done tryouts for the team at the start of freshman year but chickened out. 

Neil skipped the steps, leaping up three at a time. Andrew was lounging on the bleachers, head cocked to the side. 

“So,” Neil said. “You never mentioned that you were moving to Palmetto.”

“We were in a random Colorado ski lodge,” Andrew rolled his eyes. “What were the chances?” 

“Clearly high enough.” Neil perched on the seat beside him. “So, Aaron’s brother, huh?” 

“Obviously.” 

Neil grinned. “Give me some slack: it was dark. I suppose you’ll be following him around, at first?” 

Andrew just shrugged. “I don’t have anything better to do.” 

“Do you like Exy?” 

His eye twitched. “I’ve played before. Why?” 

Neil felt his grin widen. “You should try out.” 

Andrew crossed his arms over his chest. “Aaron says I’m doomed to be stuck with the nerds, so long as I look like him. Apparently that’s a big deal here.” 

Neil faltered slightly. “Well, yeah. Everyone kinda sticks to their own. I’ve always wanted to join the Olympiads, but they’d never let me on the team. I’m good at math and physics, but I’m on the Exy team. They don’t associate with jocks.”

“Olympiads,” Andrew mumbled. “Jesus Christ.” 

“Hey!” 

“This entire school is a disaster,” Andrew said, notching a cigarette between his lips and spun the lighter between his fingers. “I don’t give a shit about their stupid cliques.” 

Neil felt something warm in his chest. He’d always felt the same. “Careful. If Riko thinks you’re kicking up dust, he’ll retaliate. He likes to think he owns the place and prefers that everyone just sticks to their own.” 

Andrew trotted down a few steps before looking back over his shoulder at Neil. “Well, he can just get in line.” 

Huh, Neil thought, when he couldn’t get Andrew’s smirk out of his mind for the rest of the day. This is new.

*

gosh, teenagers r so melodramatic 

@filteredred don’t call me out on hypocrisy 

[darkblueboxs]

Shades of Sunset

Twenty years in the life of Andrew Minyard

Read here or on AO3 (check ao3 for content warnings)

*

Andrew is five years old, and he thinks orange is the most beautiful colour in the world.

It’s the colour of his favourite popsicle flavour, or what he’s sure would be his favourite popsicle flavour if Mrs Dunnard ever bought them popsicles. Instead, she buys the same tasteless frozen meals over and over again, oven fries or chicken nuggets or potato smileys. Andrew lets the smileys turn to mush as he fights the other foster kids for elbow room at the kitchen table, but he doesn’t smile back at the wobbly potato faces. He clears his plate all the same, because the kids who don’t get smacked.

He presses his face up against the glass in the freezer aisle and imagines the taste of sunset on his tongue.

Andrew is seven years old, and the upstairs neighbours have a ginger tabby cat. It winds around his ankles when he’s hiding in the backyard, a bright beacon amongst the dirt and scrub of the cracked earth, and Andrew can’t help but reach for it like a moth drawn in by candlelight. For a single, fragile moment, Andrew’s trembling fingers meet something warm and soft, softer than Andrew can ever remember feeling. Then the cat twists around and sinks its claws into Andrew’s arm.

Andrew clutches his forearm to his chest, watching as beads of red well up and glisten before dribbling down towards his fingertips. It’s a new kind of pain, stinging, sharper than the bruises he has grown accustomed to, but he doesn’t cry. Crying never made it stop. The next time the tabby comes near him, Andrew throws rocks until it bolts for cover with a hiss. He watches as it scrambles over the peeling fenceposts and out of sight, wishing he could follow it into the wilderness.

 Andrew is twelve years old, and when Cass sees him staring at the creamy-yellow wallpaper of what will soon be his own bedroom, she asks what his favourite colour is. Andrew tries to remember the last time someone asked, the last time someone cared, and for once his perfect memory draws an absolute blank.

“Orange,” he whispers, and Cass lights up. Together, they coat the walls with marigold paint, and when Andrew spills it down his front, Cass just laughs. His room is so bright that it almost glows, painting Cass in warm, saturated hues as they sit side-by-side, puzzling through Andrew’s homework until the rattle of keys in the front door alerts them to the rest of the household’s return. The sunbeam colours of day paint his world into a hazy mirage of safety, and for that Andrew suffers the blood-orange nights that follow. Soon, however, the light and dark bleed into each other like watercolour paints, and Andrew decides that if he cannot have one without the other, then it is safest to want nothing at all.

 Andrew is fourteen years old, and he is sick to death of orange. The juvie uniform is offensively orange, as though trying to burn the observer’s eyes out, as stark a warning as possible: approach with caution. Andrew pulls the starchy, cheap cotton over his head, and it feels as though he has worn nothing else all his life. He lets himself tumble into the faceless sea of uniform faces, not caring where the tides will take him.

 Andrew is eighteen years old, and he wishes he could be surprised when Dan pushes the fox fur-orange windbreaker into his arms, but under the ebb and flow of drug-induced mania there is truly no feeling at all. Of course the universe would continue to taunt him with too-bright uniforms that cling to him like wet sand, scratching at his lungs as he breathes around a sewn-up smile. Minyard, it says in white lettering, as though the neat stitching can tie him into this ludicrous new life with the power of a name that barely feels like his own. If their coach thinks that putting them all in one horrendous colour will magic them into a team, he has another thing coming. Uniform does not mean unity, and Andrew stands in the goal and watches distant sunburnt figures grapple and tumble across the court, stick loose in his hand. When the ball shoots past him, he doesn’t even flinch.

They can tell him what it means to wear these colours and stand on this court until the cows come home; Andrew doesn’t care. Nothing gets under his skin anymore.

 Andrew is nineteen years old, sitting in the plastic stadium seats and watching as their newest recruit races across the court. He’s a blur of orange and white, quicker than a fox and twice as sly, and Andrew doesn’t trust him an inch. He may have grown accustomed to passing his days engulfed in the campus colours that scream school pride from every street corner, but Neil makes the colour new all over again. Off the court, he hides himself in washed-out blues and greys, shrinking into his oversized hoodies as though hoping to be swallowed by them. On the court, however, there is no hiding, nor any inclination to. Neil stands on the court like he was born to rule it, throwing himself into the game with the kind of whole-hearted determination Andrew believed only Kevin was brain-dead enough to be capable of. Off the court, Neil treats the Foxes’ luminescent oranges like he would a target painted on his back. Here, he wears them like a shield.

He suits them.

Andrew doesn’t know what to make of their newest recruit, not yet. But he will.

 Andrew is twenty years old, and something has gotten under his skin. The pipe dream in the shape of a man stares at him across the Easthaven hospital waiting room through unmasked, ice-blue eyes. Back at the dorms, Andrew takes him up on the roof, peels back the plaster to see the fresh tattoo bruising his cheek. Not if it means losing you¸ he says, and Andrew resists the urge to throw him off the roof then and there. His hair is a single drop of colour against the grey sky above, deep auburn like campfire embers. Andrew didn’t think Neil could have been any more of a danger until he returned from the nest beaten within an inch of his life, the new colours streaking through his hair like a warning, threat, threat, threat.

Andrew looks at Neil, and puts a name to the burn of sensation flickering in his gut.

Andrew hates Neil, hates how softly he looks at him, hates the molten want that Neil pulls effortlessly through his veins. Above all, he hates the deep orange tint that now flits in and out of his periphery like the wings of a monarch butterfly as Neil buries himself into Andrew’s chest and fills his lungs with smoke. In the dead of night, Andrew imagines how soft Neil’s tousled curls would feel between his fingers, and wants, wants, wants for something he cannot let himself have. He remembers the sting of claws raking across his forearms all too well, knows where the path of wanting will take him if he isn’t careful.

Andrew hates orange, and hates Neil for making him feel anything about it at all. But he knows how to protect himself, knows how to keep himself back from the cliff-edge of feeling that nearly killed him once already. He won’t fall again.

 Andrew is twenty years old, and Neil’s lips taste like sunset.

 Andrew is twenty years old, and Andrew is falling. He laps the stadium once, twice, the dispersing rioters and flashing police cars blurring into a black jumble of sound and movement, but it doesn’t matter, none of it matters, because he can’t find Neil, and he had forgotten, forgotten how it felt to fall, to fear, was this fear, was this-

He almost misses the racquet lying battered and forgotten amidst empty soda cans and discarded ticket stubs. He picks it up as though he’s never seen one before, and even though the team colours have been scuffed and dirtied in the fight, it’s still the unmistakable Fox orange peeling between his fingers, white strings torn and unravelling. He picks up Neil’s bag, thumbs through his phone, and parts of him unravel too.

Andrew finds his way back to the team bus, takes one look at Kevin’s expression – broken, wild, and filled with a grief that couldn’t be explained by anything other than-

Andrew sees red.

 Andrew is twenty years old, and for the last twelve hours his world has been nothing but shades of grey shot through by occasional bursts of uncontrollable wildfire-red. Dragging Wymack along behind him like a ball and chain, he sees the men standing outside the motel room, and the final thread of his control pulls and snaps as he shoulders his way inside, not caring if he breaks a wrist in his desperation, and then-

White plaster. Blue eyes. Auburn curls.

Safe.

 Andrew is twenty-three years old, and his vision is swamped in sparkling bursts of confetti, a glittering shower of oranges and whites that tumble from the rafters like autumn leaves. The crowd is on their feet and screaming enough to shake the court’s foundations as the final score to end the season glows overhead. Neil collapses at the sound of the buzzer, striped orange bandana holding his auburn curls back from his face. They glow like embers in the stadium lights, which backlight his head like a halo. He turns to Andrew and smiles.

Andrew decides that orange isn’t so bad after all.

 Andrew is twenty-five years old, against all odds. His team’s uniform is green. Their team, as soon as Neil’s transfer paperwork goes through. Andrew won’t miss orange, much, but he will miss seeing Neil in it.

Or perhaps not. A blur of colour glides past his periphery, and Andrew pushes himself up in bed to watch as Neil pulls a jumper Andrew has never seen before over his head. He catches Andrew looking, and his lips quirk upwards.

“You like it?”

“No.” It’s something chunky and hand-knitted, perhaps a gift from one of the Foxes, and it hangs so long on Neil that the hems of his boxers barely peak past the bottom. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

Neil glances down at his bare legs, then back up, smirking. “I don’t know, am I?” He rolls back onto the bed, which strikes Andrew as counterproductive to getting dressed, but he has no interest in complaining when Neil climbs into his lap, thighs pressing into him on either side. Andrew runs a hand along Neil’s leg against the grain of his hair, slow, pensive. His fingers soon collide with soft amber wool. Neil tilts his head teasingly to one side. “I thought orange was your favourite colour.”

Andrew tangles his fingers in the collar and uses it to tug Neil in against him. “I hate it,” he murmurs into Neil’s ear, and follows it with a brief press of his lips to the one point below Neil’s earlobe that always makes him shudder.

“Like you hate me?”

“Yes,” Andrew says.

When Neil’s lips meet his, they taste like sunset.

Andrew is twenty-five years old, and he thinks orange is the most beautiful colour in the world.

*

Thanks for reading!

[xlady-saya]

Hello! I don’t really use this account a whole lot but I wanted to go ahead and make a pinned post, which I’ll hopefully remember to update frequently lol. Anyways, here’s a collection of the fics I’ve written for aftg, andreil, and others so far ^^

progress comes in small steps series [complete]

and we’re just starting to get it [Rated T, 11.1k]

Neil is nothing and everything all at once, the entire universe for Andrew, however small of a universe that is. Even Aaron is starting to see it, though the pieces still don't line up.

And Andrew is trying to convince Aaron that he's never jealous? Yeah right. You don't spend your entire life being denied, being hurt, going through foster care with nothing to call your own only to be okay with someone else trying to take the one bright piece of life you call yours.

Or, Aaron is done with Andrew's shit and makes it his job to prove his brother wrong.

there’s always more to learn [Rated T, 12.3k]

The subject of Katelyn and Neil hasn't felt like dangerous territory in a long time, but Aaron feels the bomb countdown already coming to an end before Bee even opens her mouth.

"Well, the two of them are so alike," Bee goes on, oblivious to the tension leaking into the space. Her smile is pleasant, teasing. "It just goes to show how you and Andrew have similar tastes despite being so different."

The world freezes on its axis.

Andrew inhales a little too loudly the same time Aaron chokes on his spit. "W-What?"

trust is a slow process [Rated T, 7.3k]

If Katelyn had been stealthier, she could've escaped the crowded dance floor without Andrew seeing her.

But of course, she's no Neil.

Or: Katelyn and Andrew spend some unwanted quality time together, and Katelyn sees things for what they are.

someday there won’t be scowls [Rated T, 8.1k]

Neil finds that even with his mind's best efforts to hang onto the wounds of the past, his opinion of Aaron just isn't what it used to be. He can thank Andrew and Katelyn for a lot of it, but his own observations certainly help.

When he sees Aaron like this, the mix of worry and adoration on his face as he thinks of Katelyn, Neil can't help but feel too exposed himself.

It's a start.

I want this touch to be familiar [Rated E, 38.1k]

Deep down, Andrew knew he would always reach this crossroads, a time where the thought became too strong to ignore.

Going all the way with Neil. It's not something he can continue to avoid thinking about. When Andrew looks back to the days where he held Neil's hands down, when he never got off with him in the same room, he's forced to acknowledge how much he's allowed.

Not allowed. Welcomed. Wanted.

But that’s not all there is to it, and the desire to make a decision finally makes itself known.

if magic exists, you’re the closest thing [Rated T, 16.2k]

The concept of love is not one Andrew understands.

For a long time, it escaped him. It's always fuzzy, always distorted. He'd given up on it long ago, so why is he still chasing answers?

Whatever the reason, he's content to blame Jean Moreau for a lot of things, Katelyn too.

It's their fault he's here, at the happiest place on earth.

this red is for you [Rated T, 10.8k]

Katelyn never considered herself capable of doling out violence.

It has always been a far away thought, dampened by college courses and late night dates with her boyfriend. She lives a stereotypical life, despite everything she's been through with Aaron. Aside from her growing connection with the notoriously troublesome Foxes, nothing much about her life has changed.

Even then, she's learning she's still able to surprise herself. When Katelyn witnesses Neil defending Andrew, her own protective rage rears its head, ready to be explored.

And maybe that's a good thing.

an unconventional crossing [Rated T, 8.1k]

Aaron likes to believe he and Andrew have a lot more practice navigating their conversations now. And he’s right, mostly. But sometimes, challenges arise at the strangest times, and especially when their significant others are concerned.

In which Andrew and Aaron run into each other at the grocery store, and choose not to part ways.

the roads I traveled with you [Rated T, 35.5k]

When his brother gets engaged, Aaron doesn't expect it to send his head spinning as much as it does. Marriage has always felt like a dream, or a nightmare, one he never thought either of them would be able to achieve.

In that moment, Aaron remembers what he's always known, what keeps his head above water. He wants to be with Katelyn forever. That's never been a question. But marriage hadn't been brought up. For so long it was this abstract concept, a fantasy. He'd always reasoned with himself that it would happen, rationally of course it would, but now...

Now Andrew has made the idea a reality, and Aaron has to confront his own wants for his future.

one shots/multichapters

I’ve had a love of my own [Rated T, ongoing]

Despite everything Neil could’ve imagined for his life, he never thought he’d be here, finally giving the world the interview they’ve always wanted.

It’s been decades, but even with his numerous accolades and sports wins, he finds that they’re the least important thing about his life.

Neil can’t help but laugh. Andrew would be so annoyed if he were here.

Of course, Neil only wants to talk about him, and the life they spent together.

slurred [Rated M, 1.6k]

They're not the type of people to give up control, but with each other they're willing to bend the rules.

growing pains [Rated T, 10.6k]

Stuart knows it’s perfectly normal for teenagers to have crushes. That’s why he’s not surprised in the slightest when Neil starts acting strange; lighter, happier. However, what he doesn’t expect is for the crush to leak into his everyday life—or literally take up residence in his house. Or: five times Stuart knew Neil was hiding a nighttime guest, and one time he actually met him.

your hands are mine to hold [Rated E, 6.7k]

It has taken a long time for Thea to accept a lot of aspects of their past. Her eyes track the fear in Kevin's eyes, emboldened by how his own resolve wears it away year by year. She'll never take that sight for granted.

It's hard to ignore the weights on both of them, with their lives so eaten up by the Exy world and memories of the Nest, but one thing has always remained consistent.

Thea trusts Kevin Day with her everything, and she'll never hesitate to follow him into battle.

better than a night light [Rated T, 7.3k]

Neil hasn’t had the chance to examine the feeling of fear in a long time. He’s all too familiar with it though; from the nightmares, to the memories of a cold basement floor, he knows the feeling like the back of his hand.

But this fear is new, loaded with ridiculousness and a complete lack of reason. It’s nothing more than pixels on a screen, far away theories that can’t hurt him like his past can.

Maybe that’s why he’s beginning to not mind it as much. It doesn’t hurt that Andrew is also there to hold him through it.

Playtime [Rated E, 6.7k]

There was a time when Andrew might've questioned being so into this.

Not anymore.

take what you want [Rated E, 5.4k]

Laila has come a long way from her freshman year, past all the worries and pressure to behave a certain way. She never thought she’d realize it here, lounging poolside with her girlfriend.

The urge to seduce Alvarez is just too good to let go.

a product of absence [Rated T, 7.8k]

It’s funny, Andrew thinks, that this would be seen as a curse in any other situation. Two people, thrown apart by time and circumstances, desperately searching for one another.

But Andrew has never doubted Neil’s return. He’s not running, he’s not worried. It’s perhaps the only waiting game that’s been worth it, that he understands, because this bond with Neil has only ever made sense to him.

In another life, Neil made this much clear: they would always find each other in the end.

here I am, there you go again [Rated T, 17.5k]

There's many things about the past Neil chooses to leave behind, and most of the time it's for the best. For some reason though, his brain can't help but cling to the last memories of him.

"My Ex." Neil bites his tongue at the word, because it never feels right. At this point, so many years later, that man is no one. A stranger. He shouldn't presume to know him anymore than his ex should presume to know Neil.

If he remembers Neil at all.

But Neil should know better than anyone that the past always has a way of catching up to him, and this time, he's not as willing to run as he might've initially thought.

losing battle [Rated M, 3.4k]

It's always been Nicky's dream to be closer with his cousins. However, when he opens Andrew's mail to find more than he bargained for, he finds himself regretting the wish. Unfortunately, no matter how much Andrew's warmed up to him in the last few years, Nicky's pretty sure he'll die (literally) if Andrew finds out.

Nicky's mission begins.

temper, temper [Rated T, 3.7k]

"You paid for the deluxe package," Neil says as he scrolls through his payment history to find his client's invoice. His system is simple:

Basic Package: Fuck you. A general statement of displeasure and a brief description of the wrongdoing.

Intermediate Package: Fuck you, with passion. Everything in the basic package, but with additional insults. Customizable for an extra fee.

Deluxe Package: Fuck you to hell. Everything from the first two packages, for an extended period of time, and with extra viciousness.

And it looks like Andrew Minyard is the unlucky soul today.

a new contract [Rated T, 7.2k]

Neil’s request is simple on its face, but infinitely complicated given his history.

“Convince your team to sign me.”

And this was Andrew’s deal: If Neil can prove that he’s serious, that he can build a new life for himself so that he doesn’t end up crawling back to Riko, Andrew will convince his coach to recommend him for recruitment in the fall.

Yes, it was meant to be black and white…

But Andrew should’ve known better. Nothing ever is.

What a Rush [Rated E, 1.6k]

It's always Andrew's goal to stretch Neil's pleasure to its limits, and he's barely begun to scratch the surface.

locked together [Rated E, 8.3k]

Andrew licks his lips and tugs on the tail of the beast inside him, righting it so it can point him in the direction of what he's searching for. Neil looks good on top of him, panting and giddy, and it's rare that Andrew doesn't want to flip them over and make Neil fall apart.

But...every once in a while...

Well, he's relaxed today. He wants to listen, he wants orders, he wants to be controlled so long as the control comes from Neil.

do you like scary movies? [Rated T, 22.5k]

To say Andrew has never seen the benefit in the make-believe would be a lie. However, he finds less and less use for it as he grows older. He especially fails to see the benefits of anything from the horror genre; he’s made plenty of his own mistakes, has seen more than enough to terrify him in his life. He doesn’t need to rely on jump scares and idiotic protagonists.

But when he meets Neil, self-proclaimed horror archivist, he finds that maybe he never gave the genre the credit it was due, and he ends up thanking the dull movies eventually…

They lead him to Neil, the realest thing he’s ever known.

[walkwithheroes84]

Saved By the Bell (2020) Thoughts

 When the original Saved by the Bell ended in 1992, I was still in elementary school and certainly hadn’t watched it’s first run. But over the years - via repeats - it has become something of a comfort show for me, that I turn to when I’m feeling down or just need something cheesy to chill out to. So, hen I heard about a reboot on the Peacock network, I was unsure. 

Now, having finished the ten episode season in just two days, I’m really hoping people give this show a chance. It knows what it is and what it is the child of and it lovingly pokes fun at and embraces it. All while actually showing real issues that people are facing today.

Here are my real-time after thoughts on each episode. Warning for spoilers. 

1.01: Pilot

Zack becoming Governor to get out of a parking ticket and then having no idea what to do is a very Saved by the Bell plot line. But, I love that he's not getting away with doing a bad job and the people of California actually seem to be upset with him. Also random, but - I wonder if Kelly is a doctor and why she hasn't kicked Zack to the curb if he's become such a skeevy person? I guess it is true love.

Jessie and Slater and still adorable, even as platonic friends. However, it's sad that she's kept her son so dependent on her and that it appears that Slater peeked in high school.

Lexi and Mac would be completely unlikeable if played by anyone other than Josie Totah and Mitchell Hoog. Right now, they are just unlikeable, but could grow as the series goes on.

Devante and Aisha are good and I look forward to their characters being explored more.

Daisy is fine, but I don't think she's a strong enough character to be the "lead". Many reviews have called her the "lead" and the "character viewers follow the most" and I'm not sure the character is strong enough for that. Haskiri Velazquez is capable in her role and is doing fine, but the character is a bit bland at the moment.

Principal Toddman: finally a principal that is trying to make a difference and isn't bumbling around and letting the students get away with anything.

The "running for school president" story felt straight out of the old series, with Lexi and Mac doing it for a parking space. But, I liked that in the end (it was 2 days show time and just 30-something minutes our time) they only let Daisy have the job because they didn't want to give up their spring break - not because they learned any sort of real lesson.

From previews I was a little worried that they might try and go with a Mac/Daisy pairing, and I really glad that it doesn't look that way. Yes, it feels like they might pair them down the road (if the show gets a season 2 and beyond), but for now Daisy seems more annoyed with him and Mac seems indifferent to her. It looks like the show might go with Jamie/Aisha, which could work.

1.02: Clubs and Cliques 

The theater clique is basically so cliché that its amusing. I love that they were all desperate to get Devante involved and keep him in the group chat, but he was just so disinterested. Lexi's line that she would fall for him if he kept ignoring her? Ha.

Jamie's inability to basically function as a normal fifteen/sixteen year old is alarming. The fact that he couldn't tell he is bad at football and that he makes raw food? Like, Jessie, who did you raise? That said, the football team having a "Feelings Helmet" was just amusing to me. The Bayside students are just so over the top insane.

There is a large part of me that wonders what the heck happened in the raising of Mac. Kelly had six siblings. She was raised in a working class family. I can't see her raising her son to be this entitled brat who apparently calls her stupid. And, I honestly can't see Zack allowing his son to end up an idiot who just floats through life.

But, I guess that's the point of the series: the Bayside students are all clichés and over the top archetypes of rich kids. None of them are really all that likeable and I find myself rooting for Devante, Daisy, and Aisha while wanting Mac, Lexi, and Jamie to grow up.

1.03: The Bayside Triangle

Knowing that Jamie and Lexi have been friends since they were little kids and she now has a crush on him and doesn't know how to handle it? Very relatable and makes me like her a bit more. She's right - for a lot of reasons, it can be weird to have an old friend like you.

Aisha trying so hard to fit in with the Bayside students is a bit sad, actually. It feels like she's giving up a part of herself to be who they think she should be.

Mac and Jamie's fight felt like it was straight out of the original series.

It's sad to know that Zack and Slater are no longer friends. I wonder why.

Devante is totally my favorite at this point. He just wants a fresh start and it's sad that Aisha and Daisy suspected him of wrongdoing because of his past.

Again, the fact that the students do all this weird stuff and no one at the school seems to notice or care . . .I feel that is purely making fun of the original show, but I love it.

1.04: The Fabulous Birchwood Boys

Lexi and Devante need to become best friends and stay best friends forever. Let's keep it platonic and fabulous. Also, his friends from his neighbor? I need to see more of those boys.

Jamie and Mac Freshmen year? Dorky as all get out. Lexi's fear that no one would like her. So heartbreakingly real.

Daisy having access to money for one day and becoming an entitled monster...that also felt very real. And, I'm really glad that she didn't take the easy way out and said she was sorry to the other members.

Since Mac never even asked Post Malone and since he got the other kids back - I'm starting to think the kid has more depth and empathy than I originally gave him credit for. That or Daisy is rubbing off on him. If they did Daisy/Mac down the road, I think it could work.

I felt so sorry when Lexi realized that Jamie had asked Aisha. I think they are headed for a Lexi/Jamie/Aisha love triangle, and I have to say that while I see Lexi/Jamie (because of her crush), I don't see Jamie/Aisha just yet.

Finally, Slater obsessing over the gym floors? He really did become a stereotype of a gym coach.

1.05: Rent-A-Mom

Jessie still having anxiety about caffeine and knocking what she thought was caffeine pills away from Mac was great.

Speaking of which - poor Jessie and her marriage. :( How did she end up with such a wishy-washy husband?

Slater and Aisha bonding while trying to making the team tougher was great. I cannot believe Jamie gives heartfelt speeches before games. What the hell, man? They really are pushing Jamie as the "sensitive man-child".

Jamie also mentioned that he was starting to like Aisha, but I still don't really see it. Am I alone in this? A start of a friendship, sure. But, a romance within the next few episodes - that would move too fast. Then again, it is a "teen show" and romance on those tend to move quickly.

Lexi and Mac trying to help Daisy was kind-of sweet in a weird sort of way. I like the looks into the home lives of the gang. It gives us a better understand of who they are as people.

1.06: Teen-Line

DeVante clearly facing racism and even classism at Bayside was really well done. I love that Lexi was ready to help him, because he has become such a great friend to her. Those two have really bonded and I love it.

Mac becoming a payphone, but not realizing it kind of made me smile. But what was even better was the way the school completely went into chaos after the students lost their phones. It couldn't have been more than three hours and the school already looked like a deleted scene from a post-apocalyptic film. Oh, and Mac using the rope to get in and out of the room, while the rest of the group used the door. . .loved it.

Aisha and Jamie. . .I feel like she's with him because he's attractive and sweet. There doesn't seem to be any real depth to their relationship. Though to be fair, there isn't much depth to Jamie's character - he's a satellite love interest to Aisha and Lexi.

1.07: House Party

Lexi finally seeing that she is a good (or at least better) person? I like that she is growing. Out of all the characters, I think she has gotten the most character growth (out of the kids) this season.

So. . .Mac does all his schemes because he's scared of being abandoned by the people he cares about and feels neglected by his parents? It's cliché, but. . .okay.

I'm still not really feeling Aisha/Jamie, but I'm not hating it. The relationship lacks depth, so I'm not terribly invested. But, I'm sure if I went back and watched any of the TNBC shows (without my nostalgic glasses on) those romances won't have much depth either.

Daisy trying to go wild, but instead having to be locked in a closet and making out with a coat? Eh, I get that they were poking fun at the darker and "edgy" teen soaps, but, eh.

Slater really grew during the episode and realized that it's time to leave high school behind and start acting like a real adult, and I'm proud of him.

1.08: The Todd Capsule 

Lark looked amazing. I'm so happy that she is doing so well these days.

So now we know where Screech is: on the Space Station with Kevin the Robot.

I was actually sad to learn that Kelly didn't follow her dream of becoming an actual doctor and is instead selling a fake wellness brand or some nonsense. Though, I will admit the Zack/Kelly scenes had me giggling a bit. They have become so shallow and weird, but I'm living for it. And when Zack said she was the only woman he's ever been with? That was a great jab, at least to me, at the way teen shows always do the "one true pairing" thing.

So glad Jessie now knows that Slater still has feelings for her. Can't believe her husband is having an emotional affair with one of his characters. This show can be so ridiculous.

The time capsule was a great addition to the episode, especially as they remembered all the plots that didn't make sense or were just weird: Jessie's caffeine addiction, putting on a ballet so Zack could graduate, saving a hotel in Hawaii.

How dare the gang (expect Lisa, who is a Queen) not remember Ron-Ron!

I hate - hate - that the PTA basically went behind everyone's back and is going to use the money to send the Douglas children back to their school. Yes, they can use the money to buy new things, but they will still have issues in that school. It's pure racism and classism.

Devante having a crush on Nadia (I think that's her name?) is super cute.

Loved Lexi and Daisy bonding and Lexi seeing that sometimes guilting people into things works just as well as being fake-nice. Though, you think she would have learned that by now.

So, Mac has always struck me as a character that is straight out of a 90s teen sitcom, and he still acts that way. But, I love that the show is trying to show some depth to him: he's acting out for attention from his dad. He has modeled his whole personality after his dad's high school personality in order to get attention. It's a storyline that has been done a million times (and will be done a million more times), but it fits his character.

1.09: All in the Hall

The Douglas principal saying that every few years people try and come in to "save" the school ,but than get bored and leave, because they've already gotten what they want - to feel good about themselves? Yeah, I felt that. It was so true to life, the way people rush into some new cause and than abandon it once they have gotten praise or its no longer trendy.

So happy to see Principal Toddman standing up Jade and sticking up for his students. He and Devante should have more scenes together. I like how they play off one another. I really just love Devante - he's probably my favorite.

Aisha finding a way to stay at the school via sports was very smart, but I can also see how Daisy would see it as selfish. Aisha does have a way of thinking about herself first and than others after. I think that has to do with her ultracompetitive nature - she wants to win, even if it mean leaving others behind.

Jamie got a bit more depth in this episode - finally. It was sweet that he wanted Aisha to stay, despite only having dated her for six weeks or so. He went about it completely wrong, but it was sweet. It's good that he sees that he's more emotionally intelligent than anything else.

The Aisha/Jamie stuff - eh. I never felt it to begin with, so it was no big. I'm glad that they sort of acknowledged that while he loves her, she just likes him and it was a relationship built more on physical attraction and sweet moments than anything else. I mean, they are fifteen.

Mac and Lexi feeling empathy and trying to help Daisy was nice. It's clear that they have both grown to care about Daisy (and Devante and to a lesser degree Aisha). I also enjoyed the small tease of Mac/Lexi with them both agreeing that they would totally hook up, because they are both so hot. Who doesn't love two shallow people admitting they are shallow? Though, I still think the writers are slowly - maybe - setting up something with Mac/Daisy. Maybe. Possibly.

I laughed out loud when Daisy ran into Jean (or is it Dave?) at city hall and he just kept denying that they had met before, but they clearly had.

Daisy's breakdown and her nearly doing drugs and the group hug - complete with Jamie discussing some random talent show we never saw (a jab at the original show airing episodes out of order?) - was just so classic teen sitcom. I loved that they pulled back from that by showing Mac reaching for the joint during the group hug.

1.10: Showdown

Overall the season was much better then I thought it would be and I'm really hoping that they are able to work in a season 2. I don't know if they could do several seasons, but I think they could probably do 2-3 more seasons of 8-10 episodes each. They still have a lot to focus on: relationships, class differences, the fall of the Morris family, Jessie's marriage breaking down and how that plays out with Jamie and even Slater, etc.

I really liked the two throw away lines of: Zack asking "Remember Tori?" and Kelly responding with a confused: "Huh?" and then Kelly quickly telling Mac that his father is not Jeff.

I wouldn't say Zack learned a valuable lesson, so much as he realized that he only wanted to stay Governor because he didn't want to be a loser. Which I guess is a lesson in a way, but he's still a bit of a slime ball.

I'm so glad that Slater told Jessie he was sorry for teasing her in high school because she protested and that he's happy today's teenagers are more willing to speak out about their beliefs. And, I'm even happier that Jessie stood up to her stupid and selfish husband.

Aisha and Daisy ganging up on Devante and than realizing that the clicks at school need a common enemy was great. What was better was Lexi, who has had the most character grown this season, willingly becoming the scapegoat.

Mac still needs to work on his daddy issues, but he's getting there. Hopefully he and his parents can really bond during quarantine.

Jamie telling Lexi that the only reason he wasn't sure if he wanted to date her was because she's been mean in the past was very sweet. Do I think the show is headed for Lexi/Jamie? Yes. Do I think it will last? No.

I still have a feeling that, at some point, they will do a Mac/Daisy pairing. Or at the very least have Mac develop a crush on Daisy, which will be interesting to see.

Other thoughts: I love that the show was able to poke fun at the clichés, corniness, and weirdness of all the late 80s-early 00s teen sitcoms/dramas that people my age grew up on; while at the same time exploring current day issues, without getting too preachy or pushy. They used pop culture well, without it feeling overly done. Someone else has mentioned in several threads that the show reminds them of the show Community, and I have to agree - it really does have an "early" Community vibe to it. I know a lot of shows are being cancelled or not renewed due to Covid, but I really do hope they give this one a second season. I really want to see where they go next.  

Cast List:

Main Haskiri Velazquez as Daisy Jiménez Mitchell Hoog as Mac Morris Josie Totah as Lexi Haddad-DeFabrizio Alycia Pascual-Peña as Aisha Garcia Belmont Cameli as Jamie Spano Dexter Darden as Devante Young John Michael Higgins as Principal Ronald Toddman Elizabeth Berkley Lauren as Jessie Spano Mario Lopez as A.C. Slater

Recurring Mark-Paul Gosselaar as Zack Morris Tiffani Thiessen as Kelly Morris Ed Alonzo as Max Cheyenne Jackson as René

Guest Lark Voorhies as Lisa Turtle

[thejostenator]

The Foxhole Cinema: Chapter Eight

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Neil slotted the dustpan and brush back where they had been at the beginning of the day, which already felt like it had been years ago. If working at The Foxhole was like this every day, he might actually start sleeping well again. He’d never gotten a good night’s sleep whilst on the run, but then again, he hadn’t at his Father’s house either. The last time he got a good night’s sleep was probably the one night he and his Mother spent at Uncle Stuart’s house in England after fleeing.

Even though Uncle Stuart was nice enough, his job as a lawyer was just a cover for gang work. It seemed like everyone in Neil’s life was embroiled with criminals somehow- Neil's Father had been a shady man playing at the big leagues by kidnapping Kevin, but Stuart was a genuine gangster. Neil’s mother hadn’t wanted them to go from one crime family to another so that had been a temporary stay, and even though he had Stuart’s number memorized, he had never called it.

Wymack watched him in stony silence before beckoning him closer. “Alright Josten, get a move on. We need to reach Abby’s before midnight so I can stop Kevin from doing something stupid whilst drunk.”

Neil nodded. “Sounds like a difficult task.”

“Don’t I know it,” Wymack sighed, and turned to leave the Cinema. Neil followed him out, close enough to look polite, but also far enough to avoid any malevolent hands or feet.

They were the last two to leave, so Wymack locked the door behind him. Everyone else had left earlier in the day, as their shifts ended, but Neil was forced to wait for Wymack to finish up whatever he was doing so they could leave together. Nicky had left first, wishing him a teary farewell as if they weren’t going to see each other tomorrow. Kevin and Aaron had ignored him as they took their leave, and Andrew had given him a two-fingered salute. Allison had been preoccupied with Seth, but Renee had flashed Neil another of her sugar-sweet smiles and offered to stay with him whilst he waited, but he had turned her down- he didn’t want to spend any more time with her than he had to.

She had accepted that without question.

Unfortunately for Neil, he couldn’t keep up the safe distance from Wymack once he was in his car, which was a two-seater and far too small for a man Wymack’s height. He had to stoop to fit through the driver’s seat door, but luckily Neil had no such issue. His issue lay with Wymack’s hands, and tracking their every move has he adjusted the rear-view mirror and shoved some fluffy dice dangling from it out of the way.

“Abby’s car,” Wymack said as an explanation.

“That explains a lot,” Neil said drily.

“Look,” Wymack said slowly, “You’ve only been here for one day, but you’re still a member of the team, got it?”

Neil nodded, despite the fact he disagreed. He may work at The Foxhole, but he was not part of the team.

“So,” Wymack continued, “Don’t let Minyard push you around. If he starts some shit, you come to me. Christ, if anyone starts some shit, you come to me.”

“Do we need a heart to heart right now, Coach?” Neil huffed, borrowing Andrew’s nickname for Wymack, who groaned in frustration at its use.

The rest of the drive passed in tense silence, and when they reached Abby’s house Neil clambered out of the car as fast as he could, unwilling to be trapped in an enclosed space with a grown man for any longer than possible. Wymack was not as oblivious as he had seemed when they first met, so he placed himself resolutely out of Neil’s personal space now that the option had arisen, holding out that little olive branch.

Neil took it as the peace offering it was and rung the doorbell. The front door swung open within seconds as if the woman inside had been sitting by the door waiting. She had a motherly smile and she looked Neil up and down with a gaze that was somehow both critical and comforting.

“You must be Neil,” she said, moving aside to let him in. “Please make yourself at home.”

Neil slipped off his shoes, and although he was wearing socks, they had enough holes that he could feel the cool floor against his feet. Running away from assailants constantly hadn’t left any of his clothes in the best shape (although these were the only ones he had left now, courtesy of Lola- he was starting to regret not taking the few seconds to kill her). Abby took in his threadbare socks with something akin to pity in her eyes and ushered him into the kitchen, Wymack following at a safe distance.

“We’ll get something in your stomach and then show you to the guest room,” Abby said, pulling a tray of steaming Mac n’ Cheese from the oven and heaping a serving of it into a pastel pink bowl- Neil wondered if she was the one who had chosen the Break Room’s colour scheme.

“Thank you,” Neil said, digging in.

Wymack and Abby both scooped out their own servings and sat down together, opposite Neil.

If there was one thing Neil didn’t miss from before being on the run, it was small talk at his Father’s dinners. Abby seemed determined to draw him out into conversation, commenting on her favorite popcorn flavor (salted caramel) while Wymack grumbled about Allison dumping her job on Neil since it was his first day. At that, Abby sweetly pointed out that Allison was under a lot of stress, and although it wasn’t the right thing to do, she was only doing it to go help Seth.

Neil zoned out at that point- he’d never met Seth, and if even his girlfriend called him ‘the dick’, he probably wasn’t that good of a person.

“Neil?” Abby asked, and it sounded like it wasn’t the first time she’d said his name. Neil snapped back out of his head. “You seem tired. Do you want to head to the guest room now?”

Neil nodded, edging away from Wymack as the older man rose from the table. Wymack noticed the action and sent a meaningful look to Abby, who shot one right back before leading Neil from the table.

The Guest Room had a dark colour scheme, in stark contrast to the rest of the house, with steel-grey curtains that hung down over the windows and coal-black bedspreads, but the walls were covered in movie posters and star decals that matched the gold highlights on the sheets and pillows. A door in the side lead to a conjoined bathroom. It was clear they’d put a lot of thought into it. Abby sat down on the bed and patted the spot next to her. Neil sat down next to her, just out of the reach of her hands. He automatically trusted her more than Wymack, but his Mother hadn’t been afraid to raise a hand to him if it was necessary for his safety.

“Neil,” she said slowly, “You’ve only known Wymack for just over a day, and me for about half an hour, so you have no reason to trust us yet.”

Neil nodded. That was something he understood- not trusting anyone, always being ready for a betrayal. Maybe Abby understood that too.

“But,” she continued, “I hope you give us a chance to earn that trust. I don’t know what you’ve been through in the past, except that it probably wasn’t good.”

“An understatement,” Neil said wryly before he could stop himself.

Abby fixed him with a gaze Neil couldn’t quite interpret, somewhere in the thin realm between pity and compassion. “As soon as you started working at the Foxhole, you became a valued part of the team. But, that also means you will have to spend time around Wymack. I want you to understand that you are in no danger from him.”

Neil sighed. “It’s instinct.”

Abby nodded, some semblance of understanding in her eyes. “I may not know exactly what you’ve gone through, but everyone at the Foxhole has a had a hard past, and this is all about giving people chances. But that’s not just for teenagers. You need to give us adults chances too- chances to show you we won’t be like the people from your past. That’s all we ask of you.”

Neil sighed. “I’ll try.”

That seemed to be enough for Abby, as she rose from the bed and made her way towards the edge of the room.

“Thank you. There are pyjamas on the bedside table, and toothpaste and toothbrush in the connected bathroom,” she paused in the doorway. “Goodnight Neil.”

“Goodnight Abby.”

[ninyard]

Could you write something with a Nicky & Kevin friendship or just supporting each other, set at any point during the series

you know what anon I don’t think I’ve ever genuinely thought about Nicky n Kevin’s friendship before ?? But! What a fantastic friendship it is!!!! I think there’s a pretty pivotal moment in the series of their relationship, but obligatory CW for The Raven King Chapter 11 (the thanksgiving dinner) before we get into it

First of all I think when Kevin first arrived in PSU, and when he was staying with Abby, still healing his broken hand, Nicky was the only fox except for Andrew who visited him regularly? Even Andrew didn’t really “visit” at that point, but Nicky was the only one who pro-actively wanted to see how Kevin was doing, instead of asking Wymack or Abby or gossiping between the team. It was probably in part because Nicky LOVES breaking a good story, but mostly it was because of the fact Nicky is such a genuinely kind person? He knew how alone Kevin must’ve felt after being essentially banished from his “family”, with no future in sight or a will to live, really. So Nicky showed up. He always brought a gift, and even though Kevin didn’t really speak much and really seemed to hate Nickys fast, drama-filled way of speaking, he never told Nicky to leave.

When Andrew came along and took Kevin under his wing, that kind of drove a wedge in between any semblance of relationship they could’ve had. It was Andrew And Kevin, and that was it. Andrew didn’t see a point in leaving room for Nicky in that. But Kevin never forgot what Nicky did for him, and even though they’re practically opposite types of people, Kevin and Nicky never had beef, like literally ever. Nicky tried flirting seriously with him once, but Kevin scrunched up his nose and shook his head and for the first time Nicky didn’t persist. They really just had this unspoken respect for each other, but their relationship was never really much more than that. Whereas Kevin’s relationship with Andrew was a joined-by-the-hip kind of deal, Kevin and Nicky more so looked out for each other in the smallest ways. When Nicky sprained his wrist during practice the end of freshman year, Kevin was there for him to show him the best ways to move it to build his strength back up and to take care of it so it could heal properly. When Nicky was struggling with some type of homework on the bus to a game, Kevin would peek over his shoulder and nonchalantly point out the answers. When Kevin was starting to play again, Nicky always offered to play defence to help him regain his strength against an opponent.

But you know, as soon as you mention Nicky and Kevin my head INSTANTLY goes to the aftermath of Chapter 11 in TRK. Like, Kevin had to go downstairs after finding that situation, and presumably Nicky had no real idea. So Nicky looks in the Kitchen window, while talking to his mom about nothing, and he sees Neil and Aaron head out of the kitchen. He watches Kevin follow. It’s not long before Luther is back outside with a look on his face that says nothing good, and then Nicky sees Kevin. He’s on the phone, chewing at his fingernails, face white like he’d seen a ghost. He leaves the table, overhearing Kevin reciting his parents’ address and they lock eyes when he enters the room. Kevin’s eyebrows are knitted together like he’s about to cry. He puts a hand out when Nicky tries to push past him. It takes him a minute to hang up, and suddenly Nicky’s heart is racing and he’s desperate to go upstairs. Kevin can’t find the words.

“Andrew’s hurt.” The words don’t do it justice. It feels like a lie coming out his mouth. “Nicky,” he tries to push past again. “I don’t know if you should go up there.” Nicky turns back to see his mom and dad watching them. They look like they’re about to follow. Nicky asks if he called the police or an ambulance. Kevin says both.

“Who hurt him?” Nicky doesn’t know what to say. He can hear the mumble of voices upstairs.

“I don’t know.” Kevin’s voice is almost a whisper. “There’s so much blood.” And then Nicky shoves him out of the way and suddenly Kevin’s following him up the stairs and Nicky’s reaching out to hold Andrew’s face, Neil holding a blanket around his presumably naked bottom half. Kevin nearly got sick at the sight again. He’d seen enough blood in the nest, he’d seen enough rapes and tortures and beatings and dead bodies, but this was so much worse. This was messy, this was family, this was Andrew’s abuser killed at the hands of his brother, blood on the wall of Nicky’s childhood bedroom.

So Andrew and Neil leave in the ambulance, Kevin and Nicky left to take a taxi to the police station, waiting for Aaron who left in cuffs, waiting to give their statement. They don’t say much, but Kevin puts a hand on Nicky’s shoulder when he finally cries, and leaves his own shoulder free as a place to cry on. They’re told to leave without Aaron and they’re left alone again in Columbia, waiting for David to bring Andrew home safe. Neither of them have much of an appetite to eat, and it’s a while before either of them speak.

“Did you see it happen?” Nicky is staring at a wall, hands wringing around the end of a pillowcase. “Did you watch him die?”

“No,” Kevin fought off another panic attack that crept up his throat. “Did you know who he was?”

They skirted around the topic, afraid that if they said what really happened, it would be real, it would be unfixable. But Kevin knew Nicky needed him, until somebody else came back. Can you even imagine how much Nicky must’ve been in shock? I don’t think he even called Erik until the next day, you know. The only person he spoke about it with was Kevin, and when Betsy arrived he cried with her for ten minutes before a car was pulling up and he knew it was Andrew. Kevin and Nicky had never spent so much to me alone, but there was a strange comfort in the air. Kevin was the rock that Nicky needed, and Nicky was the distraction Kevin needed. Kevin wasn’t a hugger, really, but when Nicky asked to be held, he pulled him into his chest and didn’t let go until he was ready. They both comforted each other that night, but they never spoke about it again. Nobody else had to know that they’d practically broken down in each other arms, half in shock, half processing the trauma they’d just witnessed. Nicky had never been exposed to something like that before; Kevin knew it was a life-changing event for him. Nicky didn’t have any sort of ideas of superiority about his relationship to Andrew, either. He knew how much Andrew meant to Kevin, how he had walked in to see his protector so vulnerable, so hurt. He knew Kevin had to say that word down the phone to the operator, and how he had to say it to Coach, too. And he had to say it again and again and again to the cops in the station.

I know it’s an extreme example of their friendship, but I think a lot of it goes unspoken. That night was the night where their respect for each other became physical, and visible. It became more than just nods across a court or a pat on the shoulder after a good game. They were all they had that night. Just Kevin and Nicky, alone for god knows how long, just waiting, trying to keep it together. They each took a shot of whatever spirit they could find before Betsy arrived, and nobody had to know about that either. They coped in their own ways after that, but it really solidified how much they cared about each other, I think. Kevin texted Nicky for the first time that week, a couple different times, just to see if he was okay, how he was doing, if he needed anything. And oh man, did that mean the absolute world to him. Kevin and Nicky’s relationship is probably one of the more unexpectedly close relationships in the series, when I think about it. They didn’t experience what happened that night in the way Andrew or Neil or Aaron did, but the way they looked out for each other when both their worlds came screeching to a halt in the upstairs bedroom in a house that was no longer home? Unmatched.

There’s definitely softer/“fluffier”/funnier instances of them being friends but my mind couldn’t NOT let me write about this cos it was all I could think about SORRYYYY

[turnupbrock]

Noise Complaint- Colby Brock

This is a request from one of my amazing readers on here. "Can you do one where the reader is Sam or Jakes neighbor and they are trying to sleep or edit so they go over and to tell them to quiet down and they meet Colby or something like that please. And anonymously please"

 Tired was an understatement. You were exhausted. After a long day, you were just finally coming home at 1:30 in the morning. Which was insanely annoying because you knew that you were going to wake up late the next morning. It was a stressful day, you woke up late for your hair appointment which in turn, made you late for your nail appointment, then of course you were late to your photoshoot which was supposed to be at 12 in the afternoon, but instead you made it there at 12:45 due to traffic. Plus you had to film a couple of videos with your friends plus your own video, then they wanted to go shopping which lead to hours of spending money, and then finally you all made it back to their shared house, where you lost track of time, hints why you came home so late. It wore you out.

You didn’t even care that you left all the bags full of your new clothes and jewelry laying on the floor of your living room. All you wanted to was go change out of your uncomfortable clothes, wash all the makeup off your face, and go to sleep. You were asleep on your feet- dead on your feet? Whatever the saying was. You sighed in satisfaction as you patted dry your freshly cleaned face. Looking up in the mirror you saw you now clean face accompanied with your puffy eyes, eyelids hanging low. Walking into your room you took satisfaction with the dark and coolness of the space. Slipping on an oversized shirt and some pajama shorts, you finally crawled into bed.

There were no dreams playing in your head, just blackness, pure peace. That was until loud music invaded your peaceful sleep. You groaned and turned over in bed, you threw your leg over the large space, looking for a cold spot. Once you found one you smiled softly and snuggled your face into your pillow. The music continued to play loudly through the walls making you groan and lift your head to look at the wall. You knew your neighbor, it was Sam with his girlfriend Katrina. She didn’t live with him but she was over a lot. You met them a couple of days after they moved in last year. You guys weren’t close but you were friends. With being neighbors and being friends you came up with a knocking code. Two is to say that you’re being too loud, three is that one of you needs something, and four is just to say hi. Raising your wrist you knocked on the wall twice. After a minute of not getting a response, you knocked again but this time a little louder. Again no response.The music still blasted, keeping you awake. “Fuck” you groaned while getting out of bed.

You bother to fix your messy bun, you just slipped on your vans that were laying on the floor next to your bed. Wrapping your arms around your body, you walked out of your apartment and straight to the door next to yours. Lifting your hand you finally banged loud on the door, not caring if you sound like an ass. You were tired and they were keeping you up. You kept in mind that it was a friday and that it was the weekend, time to party. Finally the door swung open to reveal a tall man with platinum hair and red solo cup in his hand. He offered you a soft smile before smirking, “Saaam you’re in trouuuble” he yelled into the full apartment. You smiled and shook your head at the boy who just shot you a wink and walked away. Sam approached the door but before he could get a word out, Katrina barreled towards you, almost knocking you over. “Oh my god,” Kat gasped in your ear. “I missed you girl.” Releasing her from the hug you reply, “Missed you too babes”

Sam chuckled and pull Kat to his side, “So what’s up?” he asked, his eyebrows drawing in together. You sigh, “ I’m really sorry Sam, you know I love a good party and I bet that this is an amazing kickback and I hate to interrupt-” Sam cut of your rambles with a cute chuckle and shake of his head, “Yes Y/n, I’ll turn down the music” You let out a breathy laugh and shook your head. “Sorry and thank you.” “Of course.” You turned to leave but Sam stopped you, “Wait I have some new merch that will be released in the next few days but as you know, me and a couple of my friends are starting to move tomorrow so let me give you some pieces now.” he explained. “Oh, okay. Great. Thank you sam.” “No problem dude, come in.” Sam stepped back, letting you in. You stepped in and you became very aware of the fact that you were in pajamas and the large shirt made it look like you had no pants on. Katrina saw the hesitation on your face so she slipped her arm around your waist and started to lead you into the living room where all of their friends were in. “It’s okay girl, you look fine.” she reassured you. You slightly nodded your head and gave her a smile.

“Guys this is Y/n, Sam’s neighbor.” she announced to the group. “Y/n that is Corey, Jake, Reggie, Ariya, Kevin, Griffin, Mike,” she pointed to each person as she said their names. “That is Tara, Devyn, Xepher, and Cassie. Tara is Jake’s girlfriend, Cassie is Reggie’s, and Xepher is with Griffin.” “Who used to be my girlfriend,” the one named Mike pointed out. You folded your lips in your mouth, “Welcome to the family meeting” Kevin said, smiling a brilliant smile. You smiled back, “It’s nice to meet you all.” They all seemed nice and you loved their style, it was just like yours. But one guy caught your eye more than the rest, the one with the striking blue eyes and blue hair to match. You eyed if for a moment before looking away because you didn’t want to get caught staring like some creep. Just then Sam came out of his bedroom holding a black hoodie that said xplr written on the strings that tighten the hoodie, a light pink hoodie that said never normal on it, a black shirt that also said never normal, and a white shirt that said I think she wants to be me on it. “Here you go,” he said when handing them off to you. You loved them and how soft they were. “ Thank you so much Sam but you didn’t have to do this,” you said taking them from his hands and laying them in your arms.

Sam wove his hand in the air, “No problem really, I just want some of your merch when it comes out,” he said, winking at you. You giggled and nodded your head, “Sure thing.” You turned back to the group and gave them one last smile and wave before making your way to the door again. “Goodnight guys, thanks again.” “Goodnight Y/n.” Sam said giving a soft smile before closing the door just to open it a second later, “I promise to keep it down mom,” “oh fuck you!” You laughed before walking into your apartment. You could hear their mixed laughter, making you laugh to yourself before closing your door. You walked back into your room and laid down, your mind still having the blue haired boy in your mind, you didn’t hear his name when Kat said it but you swore it started with a C or something around there. You smiled to yourself when you heard the music turn down. Laying back on the bed, you fell right back asleep.

“So who was that?” Mike asked Sam once him and Kat sat back down on the couch. “Oh that’s our neighbor. She does Youtube just like us, met her a couple of days after moving in here. She’s super nice.” “And pretty.” Kat chimed in. The girls nodded in agreement, “Yeah she was gorgeous.” Tara said. “How come she never came over for pizza night? You’ve known her for what? Almost a year at this point?” Reggie questioned. Sam shook his head and reached for his red solo cup, “I have in the past but she said that she didn’t want to intrude on a friend thing. I told her that she wasn’t but she insisted.” “That sucks, I would love to get to know her.” Devyn pouted, slumping into the couch. “Maybe I’ll convince her to come to the next one,” Kat suggested. Which everyone agreed to. Colby couldn’t stop thinking about how beautiful you were. Clean face, no makeup and you still were beautiful. You seemed nice. “Hello. Earth to Colbyyy,” Kevin said waving his hand in front of his face. He shook his head to try and clear his thoughts, “What- sorry. What’s up?” Kevin smirked, “Whatcha thinkin about?” Kevin teased his friend. His cheeks flushed and he felt them heat up, “ Nothing.” “Mmhm. So you weren’t thinking about the hot neighbor?” Ariya asked, tilting his head. Colby’s cheeks heat up more, “OOOO he’s blushing!!” Tara yelled pointing her finger at Colby’s red face.

“Shut up,” he grumbled. Everyone shared a laugh before all conversations resumed and the night went on for another hour and a half before everyone left. Colby threw his keys on the counter before tiredly waddling into his room before crashing on his soft bed. The next morning he woke and reached over to try and grab his phone. But when his hand landed on his nightstand, his phone was nowhere to be found. He lifted his head and groaned when he couldn’t see his phone. Colby sat up and threw on a hoodie that he had lying on the foot of his bed before walking towards the apartment door. Looking at the clock on the over he saw that it was 11, he knew that Sam would be up. Once he reached Sam’s door, he raised his fist to knock, soon after Sam’s voice rang out, “IT’S OPEN!” Colby opened the door and walked in, “Hey brother, I left my phone here last night. Have you seen it?” he asked. When he looked up he saw Kat and you on the coach, “Oh yea, it’s on the table brother.” Sam called from his kitchen where he was packing his silverware. “ Thank you.” Sam hummed in response.

Colby walked into the living room where you and Kat were. “Hey, Y/n right?” Colby asked. You looked up from the tiktok that Katrina was showing you. “Yup. I’m sorry I missed your name last night.” you said your smile morphing into a slight frown. Colby internally melted from how cute you looked in that moment. “Colby,” he replied. You smiled wide at that, “I love that name.” you complimented. Colby smirked, “I would love to have your number.” Your eyes widened, “That was smooth as fuck. I’ll give you points.” You laughed. Katrina and Sam laughed at your remark, “Give me your phone,” Colby smiled and threw you his phone, you pressed your number into it then threw it back. Colby smiled at the name, you put your name in with a black heart at the end with a winky face. You stood up from the couch and yawned, “I’m going to take a nap but I’ll see you guys tonight?” You asked about fixing your pants and looked over at Sam. He nodded, “Yup.” Colby’s eye’s widened along with his smile, “You’re coming over tonight? To hang out with us?” You laughed at Colby’s dumbfounded expression and nodded, “Yeah, figured I’d give it a whirl.” You teased. Colby playfully rolled his eyes, “haha very funny. We’re very funny and nice.” You winked at him, “I’m sure you are. See you later neighbors.” Kat stood up and followed you to the door.

“I wanna take a nap with you!”

[zmediaoutlet]

in support of wildfire relief, @balder12 donated $20, and requested Sam/Kevin with hair play. Thank you for donating!

to get your own personalized fic, please see this post.

Kevin feels he deserves a little better, than this. He doesn’t exactly—he wasn’t exactly used to booze, hadn’t ever really had a drink before he met the Winchesters that wasn’t the cherry schnapps his mom sometimes drank—and okay, so most of the time when he’s gotten drunk it’s been entirely on accident. But still. Whatever Dean drinks is some kind of weird dollar store swill (assuming they sell alcohol, at the dollar store, which to be fair he doesn’t know but he assumes that if they do then what Dean buys would be of that quality), and Kevin is a friggin Prophet of the friggin Lord, so if he’s going to be drinking then he should be drinking—he doesn’t know. Fine wines. Something laced with myrrh, whatever myrrh is. He was going to take Comparative Religions his first semester of college; he never got to find that out. He never got to go to college. Sam did.

Sam. That’s right. Kevin—he has a plan. He deserves better, he thinks. He’s been working on the tablet because that's his job, and he knows that he has a duty and he isn't going to shirk it. His mom had taught him better than that. Still, he thinks—as a Prophet—as a man, which he guesses he is—he shouldn’t just be… relegated to homework duty. Study session captain, providing all the notes. Even if the notes were triple-highlighted and with meticulous bullet points, and made sure that everyone in the group actually passed the exams. Or could take down heaven, or… whatever the hell the Winchesters have planned. He’s the brains behind the operation. He deserves a little something, for all the effort.

He’s pretty much finished the bottle Dean thought he’d hid. Kevin’s never had horse pee but he suspects that horse pee would be better. It’s a plastic jug, and it stings going down, but he needs some kind of courage and apparently the Winchesters are too cheap to keep myrrh-booze around. He finishes his cup and combs his hair, in front of the mirror in his room. His head feels like it’s bobbing at some long tether, past the end of where his neck should be. His lips feel numb. It’s kinda cool.

He doesn’t knock, at Sam’s room. When the door opens it’s dark and he bangs it into the wall. There’s a jolt, and in the light streaming in from the hallway he sees Sam twisted around, a gun in his hands, the blankets a mess. "What," Sam says, in that voice. Kevin smiles at him. Sam blinks. "Kevin. What?"

"Yeah," Kevin sighs, and crosses the room and crawls right up onto the bed, his limbs all heavy. Sam turns onto his back, surprised, meets him. Kevin’s in socks and sweatpants and the Harvard sweatshirt Dean had given him as a joke, except that Kevin actually loves it and wears it whenever he gets a chance, and Sam’s hands settle on his waist, gripping in through the soft fleecy crimson, holding him. Kevin sighs again, settles in. Sam’s lap, his bed. Firm as a rock, like Kevin’s, but—warm. ‘Cause Sam is there.

"Hey," Sam says, cautious, and Kevin makes a small noise and leans down, lassitude soaking through him from all that shitty shitty booze, and Sam tips his head up and meets the kiss, soft. Soft, but steady, and bracing. He’s like a colossus, Kevin thinks, distantly pleased. That was a good vocab word. The Colossus of Sam. He lips at Sam’s mouth and gets a slow breath, and Sam tipping his head so it’s in the right place, and the kiss is—easy, like that, because Sam makes it easy. His mouth, firm but yielding when Kevin asks, and he doesn’t make fun of Kevin for being shy, or for not—not really—knowing what he’s doing. His hands shift, on Kevin’s waist, slip over his back, over the Harvard sweatshirt. Under it, just the edge of his fingers, and Kevin smiles against his mouth and drops his head, the booze swirling steady and dragging as hard as gravity, pinning him into Sam’s lap, making him laugh.

"You’re in a good mood," Sam says. Smile in his voice. Sam, happy. That doesn’t happen too often. Another slow drag of hands, up his back, and Kevin sits back into them, lets Sam take his weight because he totally can. Door’s still open and there’s enough light in here that he can really see—Sam, in a black tee, his hair a little mussed from sleeping, his eyes on Kevin above him. "What's up?"

"I have a plan," Kevin says. He tries to make it sound serious but he doesn't feel all that serious. Sam's eyes narrow a little, looking at his face. "I think—"

"Are you drunk?"

"That," Kevin says, with dignity, "is not relevant."

"Wow," Sam says, "you really are," but he doesn't sound mad or anything. There's a dimple peeking, in his cheek.

They shift a little, Sam moving under his weight. Not that Sam seems to think his weight is any impediment. Kevin's knees spread on the rock-hard mattress and Sam ends up with his back firm against the headboard, his hands still laced easy around Kevin's waist, looking at him. He's an inch or two taller than Sam, sitting like this, and he laughs a little, enjoying it. The top of Sam's head is nice, who knew?

"You have a plan," Sam prompts him. The corner of his mouth keeps turning up, before he makes it go thoughtful again. "Let's hear it."

It feels distant right now. "Well," Kevin says, and drifts for a second. Sam's body is—it's not like he didn't know this, but Sam's body is—nice. Feels nice. He presses his hands against Sam's pecs and they flex, whether on purpose or not Kevin doesn't know but. Wow.

"Kevin."

"I think you should kiss me," Kevin says. Not what he meant to say.

"Is that the plan?"

He grips Sam's shirt, rolls his eyes. "I mean, it is now," and gets Sam to smile briefly before there's the lean up, a big hand between his shoulderblades to keep him balanced while Sam presses their lips together. Firm-and-yielding, and when Kevin's mouth parts on a little breath Sam tips his head and makes the kiss a little—more yielding, a little wet, enough that Kevin's belly already warm from the booze feels like someone turned it to boil.

"How's that," Sam says, when he pulls back. Soft. Smug. Shithead.

"You suck," Kevin says. Somehow his hands ended up in Sam's hair and he plays his fingers through it. It's soft. Sam showered, before he went to bed, and his hair's clean and probably conditioned and just… nice, like the rest of him. "I deserve more than this."

Sam sits still, letting Kevin tangle him up. "You do," he says.

Kevin tweaks a long wave, there at Sam's temple, focusing. The plan. "Yeah, I do," he says, like Sam was arguing. "I mean, I know I'm not like—whatever, hot or a—a stud or something, but I am a Prophet and I feel like I should get more than a kiss every once in a while. Anyway, I don't see anyone else around here that you could make out with, so you might as well—"

"Wait," Sam says, shaking his head, but Kevin does have a plan and he got drunk for this, okay, so he's not going to be interrupted.

"—and if you're like, holding back because I'm a virgin, you don't need to worry about that, all right, because I've read like a lot about it and I figured out my mom's kid-safe password for the internet when I was eleven, okay, so I know how it goes."

Sam's grip on his sides is tight and Kevin squirms. The hands go looser but Sam's staring at him. "You're—Kevin." Kevin makes a small noise. Duh, he's Kevin. Maybe Sam's drunk too. "Kevin, you're twenty."

"I'm twenty-one," he says, offended. Just because the Winchesters lose years all the time doesn't mean everyone else does. He drags his hands through Sam's hair again, sweeping it back from his face, and Sam's giving him this look that he doesn't really get. Sam looks at him a lot in ways he doesn't really get.

"Twenty-one," Sam says, after a few seconds. Kevin nods. "Sorry."

There's a pause, again. Kevin's comfortable, now he's said his piece. He plays with the ends of Sam's hair where they curl forward. It's really different to his, which pretty much just lays there unless Kevin experiments with products. Sam's got—body. Kevin glances down, where Sam's chest rises with his breath, and grins. Yeah, he's got body.

"When I—after that hunt. When I kissed you." One of Sam's hands slides to the center of his chest, right over where it says Harvard. "Was that the first time someone…?"

"I had a girlfriend," Kevin says.

"That's not an answer."

Sam's as bad as his debate coach used to be. "No," he says, exaggerating it, "it wasn't my first kiss." Might as well have been, because he and Channing hadn't been any good at it. Kissing was just wet and kinda gross, Kevin had thought, until a month ago when Sam had looked down at him with this glad proud look on his face after Kevin had given them the research they needed to figure out their hunt, and he'd said you really saved our asses, and Kevin had looked up at him and Sam's face had changed and he'd, very softly, touched Kevin's chin, and Kevin had felt like he'd lost his balance and Sam had looked back and forth between his eyes—like a movie, Kevin thought, dumb in the moment—and he'd dipped, and it had been…

Sam's hands are under his sweatshirt, now. Just holding his back, his thumbs idly stroking. "Tell me what you did with your girlfriend," he says, and it's just an easy suggestion but also it kinda sounds like Sam does sound, sometimes, when something's a suggestion but really it's an order. How he talks to Dean, when they're prepping a hunt.

Kevin's weirdly pleased to be on the other end of it. "Studied mostly," he says. It's just honest but for some reason Sam smiles. He cards his fingers through Sam's hair again. "And—well, I guess this, too." Sam raises his eyebrows, questioning, and Kevin says: "This. I used to braid her hair for her. For dance performances."

"Really," Sam says, and Kevin shrugs. He squirms closer, in Sam's lap, and loosens the fall of hair behind Sam's left ear. Yeah, there's enough. He tips Sam's chin so he has space and starts in. Sam laughs softly. "Okay. Uh—Kevin." Kevin ignores it; he's busy. "When you… did you ever want to do more? With your girlfriend? More than kissing, I mean."

Sam's hair is great to work with. He unwinds a little and restarts with a french braid, instead, since it's so smooth. Sam asked him a question, though. "Um, not really," he says. Three over two over one over two. It's a soothing pattern, very rhythmic. Like differential equations. "It felt awkward. I mean… it was Channing, you know?"

He admires the effect, curving around Sam's ear, and turns his chin again to do the other side. Sam lets him, holding still for it.

"But you want more," Sam says, while the braid forms perfectly over his right ear. "With me."

Kevin pauses. There was something—different, in Sam's voice. He plaits the last inch, finishing, and he's—aware maybe, more than he has been, of Sam's hands on his skin. They're just sitting there, low on his back, the thumbs still gently moving. "I mean," he says, and bites his lip.

With the sides braided, Sam looks like a Viking. He's big enough to be one. "Did you know that Vikings actually had a much better standard of living than most people think?" Kevin says. "They were really big into bathing."

"Yes, I knew that," Sam says. He sits up more and Kevin's weight shifts, in his lap, so that he grabs onto Sam's shoulders to balance, but of course with Sam's hands on his back he wasn't going to budge at all. Sam's hands shift to his hips and he kisses Kevin again, leaning in quick without his usual careful bend where it feels like he's asking to make sure Kevin's okay with it—Kevin sucks air, opens his mouth, and Sam's tongue is—oh, wet but it's not—not like it was, with Channing, and he makes some weird noise and has his fingers in Sam's hair again, at the back where it's so soft, gripping, trying to make sure he doesn't just float away. Sublimation, solid to gas in a second.

"You're hard," Sam says, quietly, when he pulls back. Kevin's dizzy. Oh, he is. He looks down, between them, and Sam's thumb is dragging down the waist of his sweatpants a little, and he is—yeah—bulging there, really obvious. His belly throbs.

Sam's other hand cards through Kevin's hair. It feels nice and he closes his eyes, just feeling. Sam kisses him again, shallow enough that he can still think, and Sam's thumb drags around the curve of his jaw, and Sam's other thumb slips over, to under his bellybutton, rubbing there a little. "You deserve more," Sam says—funny tone—but that's agreement at least, and Kevin's skin goes hot all over. Not drunk enough to be nervous but he…

When he opens his eyes Sam's cheeks are a little red. Kevin wonders suddenly if he's hard, too, but with Sam's eyes on his he doesn't want to look down. "Let me just take care of you," Sam says, abruptly. "You're drunk and I don't—for tonight, at least. Just let me."

Kevin has no idea what that means. "Okay," he says, because he'd probably agree to anything when Sam looks like he does, right now, when he's—feeling as much as he is, right now.

Sam's mouth turns up, on one side, and then the world tips—Kevin's on his back, his head by the footboard, and Sam's leaning over him with his hand planted on the mattress, Kevin's knees spread around his waist. He reaches up and grips into Sam's hair, the ends of the braids fraying loose. "Yeah, hold on to me," Sam says, soft, encouraging, and Kevin closes his eyes and feels the silky warmth under his fingers, and does.

[yespleasetommyshelby]

When I was your man ~ Jay Halstead

Song imagine based on ‘when I was your man’ by Bruno Mars. ~ It’s super long, my apologies

‘Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now, our song on the radio but it don’t sound the same...’

Jay clenched his eyes shut moments after opening them, reaching out he felt the cold side of the bed, hoping it had all been a dream and that when he woke she’d be lying there in his old t-shirt hair sprawled across the pillow, but with no luck, she was really gone.

Trudging his way to the kitchen he switched on the radio as he waited for his coffee machine, the first song just happening to be the song that they shared their first kiss to that night in Molly’s, while celebrating Adam and Wendy’s engagement... What had gone so wrong?

“Jay talk to me! Please!” She begged watching as he opened yet another beer before strolling back over to the coach.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Jay shrugged focusing back on the Hawks game on tv, not knowing just how badly he was hurting her.

“You was kidnapped Jay, beaten and tortured for hours before the team got to you, it’s been three weeks and you haven’t said a word about it, it isn’t healthy.” She said moving to stand opposite him, next to the tv that was slowly losing his attention.

“I’m fine! The team got to me in time, I’m okay!” He raised his voice, feeling his temper rising he clenched and unclenches his fists to try and stop the storm he could feel inside.

“No! You’re not fine, you’re not okay, sure the bruises have healed and you were cleared for work but you are not okay! You’re constantly mad about anything and everything, you only leave the apartment to go to work, you’ve barely been able to look at me since you got home! You are not okay Jay.” She said quietening down as she got to the end of her short speech, feeling the tears slip down her cheeks she hastily wiped them away before looking back at Jay, his attention still on the tv, although he was barely concentrating.

“You know what Y/N, we’re done. I don’t need you nagging at me to talk all the time, I’m fine.” He yelled standing up and finally looking at the worn out girl standing before him, the bags under her eyes and the tear stains lining her cheeks, feeling his anger dissolve instantly he slowly reached out towards her. “Y/N, I’m sorry ple-“

“You know what Jay, you were right, we’re done.” She shrugged dropping her arms down to her side before walking into their shared bedroom.

“I didn’t mean it like that, please don’t go.” Jay said quietly as he followed her to into the room, regret and guilt instantly making their way to his heart as she looked up at him with sparkling eyes and a sad smile.

“Jay, I’m done, I can’t deal with your mood swings anymore, just, make sure you talk to someone, okay?” She looked over at him as she lifted her duffel bag over her shoulder. “I’ll always love you Jay Halstead.” She whispered placing a chaste kiss on her love’s cheek before walking past him, out of the door and out of his life.

6 months, he thought to himself as he watched his cup fill up, the stench of coffee filling the space in an instant. 6 months without her smile, her laugh, her eyes, her touch, her, he missed everything about the girl who had managed to snatch his heart in an instant. The girl who knew just what to say on his rough days, who could always see through his lies, she could light up a room just by walking in but most of all he missed how much she loved him, how much they loved each other.

‘When our friends talk about you all it does is just tear me down, ‘cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name...’

“Soo, guess who’s bringing a guest to Platt and Mouch’s wedding.” Kim grinned as she practically skipped over to Kevin’s desk, raising an eyebrow he silently told her to carry on, he’s always ready for some gossip. “Y/N is bringing an old friend from highschool.” She smiled before showing him the texts that she had shared with the girl the night before.

Jay could feel his heart split when he heard Kim, just hearing her name brought back the sharp pain of regret, there was a lot of things that Jay regretted in his life but none compared to the day he let her walk out. Now, not only was he going to have to face her at the wedding but he was going to have to stand and watch as she spent her night with a man, a man that wasn’t him, and that broke his heart just that little bit more.

‘I should’ve brought you flowers, and held your hand, should’ve have gave you all my hours, when I had the chance... Take you to every party ‘cause all you wanted to do was dance...”

She had missed the ceremony he had been checking every time the door opened, Kim had said it was something to do with work but she’d definitely be at the reception, she promised. As he sat out the back of the dance hall Jay couldn’t help the smile that came to his face as he thought about the memories that he and Y/N shared over the course of their year relationship, yet a tear escaped as his thoughts turned to all the little things he could’ve done to keep her.

“Look how pretty those are.” She grinned pressing her nose against the store window, flowers of every colour and arraignment filling her sights, a gleam in her eye that went unnoticed by the man standing behind her, nose stuck in his phone. “God, I love flowers.” She smiled over at him, quickly frowning as she noticed he wasn’t paying any attention. “Jay?”

“Yeah, real pretty.” He agreed, not really knowing what to, before starting to walk again. With a sigh she took one last look at the flowers and stepped away to follow him, making it no further than ten steps he stopped, he had to get to work, he always had to get to work.

“Hey baby.” She greeted him with a kiss as he walked through the door to their apartment, home after a long day chasing criminals and trying not to be shot at.

“Hi.” He muttered, quickly dumping his coat on the table in favour of picking out an ice cold beer from the fridge.

“So, Kim said that their having a karaoke night at Molly’s.” She said suggestively, moving closer. “You know we’ve never really been dancing before.” She mentioned, dropping a subtle hint that she wanted to go and dance, to let go of life’s stresses.

“Not tonight Y/N, I’ve had a long day.” He sighed walking away with his beer in hand, not realising the look of hurt on her face as she watched him go, she knew she was losing him.

“Hey! Look who decided to show up!” A voice from inside echoed catching Jay’s attention, she must be here, he thought to himself, she was the only one who wasn’t there yet.

‘Now my baby’s dancing, but she’s dancing with another man...’

“Hey guys!” She grinned as she rushed over pulling her friends in for a hug as she let go of her ‘dates’ arm, it had been an agreement with Trudy that she would bring a date to the wedding, even if Trudy had to set it up herself, which she did.

“Who’s your date?” Adam asked motioning over to the man who was looking around the crowd, not feeling as though he belonged with the crowd.

“That’s Jason, he’s Trudy’s nephew, apparently we both needed a date to keep her happy, so here we are.” She smiled thinking back to their agreement. “How are things?” She asked casually although Adam knew what she really meant, ‘How is he?’

“Broken.” He shrugged, eyes searching the room for the man he was referring to. “Things haven’t been the same since things ended Y/N, he misses you like crazy.” He told her watching as pain appeared in her eyes before she blinked and it vanished.

“I wasn’t first priority, Adam, I wasn’t even in his top ten priorities, there was always something more important or more urgent that needed his attention, I loved him Adam.” She said thinking back on their failed relationship, the squeak of a door opening caught her attention, looking over to see the man she’d been missing for the past few months walk in, still looking as perfect as ever but a slight twinkle missing from his eyes, his smile was no longer as bright as she’d remembered it to be. “I still love him Adam.”

As he walked back into the room the first thing that caught his attention was her, his eyes finding her like it was natural she was stood talking to Adam a small smile on her face, a smile that once would have been wide, bright, able to light up a whole room. Mentally preparing himself he started to walk over to them, but what he hadn’t prepared for was for her to be tapped on the shoulder and whisked away by some tall, dark and handsome man who spun her onto the dance floor.

“Hey man.” Adam spoke, tearing Jay’s attention away from the couple on the dance floor. “You good?”

“I lost her man, she should’ve been dancing with me.” He sighed watching as she smiled and laughed while being spun in a circle before falling back into her dates arms. “Now she’s dancing with another man.” His heart hurting as the words left his mouth, patting Adam on the shoulder he trudged his way past the couple towards the bar where he sat in his own pity party.

‘Although it hurts, I’ll be the first to say that, I was wrong... Oh I know it’s probably much too late, to try and apologise for my mistakes, but I just want you to know...’

Tired from the spinning Y/N handed her partner over to Kim and headed towards the bar in need of a drink, spotting Jay sitting on his own she sighed and decided it’s now or never, they need to talk, at the very least to get some closure.

“Hey.” She said quietly as she slid onto the stool beside him, thanking the bar tender as they handed her the drink she had ordered.

“Hi.” He said stunned, looking over at her he couldn’t believe that she was actually sat there talking to him, the past few months he had spent his time imagining what he would say if he had the chance, a chance to make things right. “I’m sorry.” He said smiling sadly at her for a brief second.

“Jay..” She trailed off not knowing what to say, the pain on his face making her heart feel like it was breaking all over again.

“Y/N listen, I am so sorry. I know I wasn’t the best boyfriend, shit, I wasn’t even a good one full stop and I know that now. I didn’t treat you even nearly as good as you should’ve been treated, I just wish it didn’t take me losing you for me to realise how special you are.” He said sadly, picking up his beer and taking a swig, trying to hide the pain he was feeling.

“Hey, don’t think like that, you was a great boyfriend, when you were around.” She said part-jokingly but mostly seriously and Jay knew that, he could always tell when she was serious, when she was lying, or just when she needed some time alone.

‘I hope he buys you flowers, I hope he holds your hand... Gives you all his hours, while he has the chance, takes you to every party ‘cause I remember how much you love to dance... Do all the things I should’ve done, when I was your man...’

“I know things didn’t work out with us and I regret it everyday, every night, everytime I close my eyes.” He said reaching over and taking her hand, feeling the warmth he’d been dying for the past 6 months, no idea that y/n had missed the feeling just as much, maybe even more. “But I hope he treats you better than I ever did, I hope that he gets your subtle hints about wanting flowers and isn’t so engrossed in his phone that he forgets by the time you pass the next stall.” He said thinking back to all the times he had noticed you looking at flower displays. “Make sure he holds your hand in public so everyone knows you’re his, and don’t let him get too caught up in work like I was, am, spend every hour you can with him. And I hope he takes you to every party he gets the chance to, Ive always regretted not taking you to dance because I remember just how much you love it.” He said smiling slightly, intwining their fingers.

“Jay..” she whispered staring down at their hands, her heart breaking all over again hearing him telling her that it’s okay if she moves on, and how lowly he thinks of himself because of this whole situation. “It wasn’t all bad, you made me the happiest person alive just by being mine, I don’t need every second of your time or flowers or even to go dancing, I just needed to know I was a priority, that I was important to you.” She said sadly looking down, feeling a warm hand cup her cheek she looked up to see Jay staring at her like she was the most beautiful thing in the world.

“You were the most important person in the world to me, hell, you still are y/n, just promise me he’ll treat you better than I ever did.” He said letting go of her hand, finishing his drink he stood up and started to walk away before a small hand grabbed onto his wrist and pulled slightly, holding him back.

“He’s gay Jay.” She said with a small smile. “We both had an agreement with Trudy that we’d bring a date to the wedding, I didn’t have any one to take and neither did he, so we made our own agreement, I’m still in love with you Jay Halstead and I don’t think I’ll ever not be.” She shrugged pulling him closer, so close she could smell his aftershave and see the small hairs above his lip.

“I love you y/n.” He said placing his hands on either side of her face, looking in her eyes for any sign of doubt.

“I love you too Jay Halstead.” She smiled bringing their lips together in perfect sync, both feeling more whole than they had felt since their relationship had ended.

“I promise you,” He began as he pulled away. “I will treat so much better this time.” He smiled slightly.

“I know you will.” She smiled, feeling as though her life was full again.

** I apologise for the ending, I had no idea where I was going with this one.. Anyhoes, feel free to send any requests :) **

[joos-ten-10]

Immortality

I don’t know how or why this idea popped into my head, but it did and demands to be written. So here you go - an immortal AFTG fic that nobody asked for.

It had been at least two centuries since his mother had performed the spell on herself and her son that made them invulnerable to natural death. There were loopholes, though. They could be hurt, even killed by manmade weapons. Neil’s mother had met her fate that way - through a weapon Neil’s father favoured. That was almost three decades ago.

Neil had been running since he was ten years old, and now, hundreds of years later, he was still trying desperately every day to escape his father. He was holed up in a town in the middle of nowhere called Millport. He knew there were others like him. His father was even an immortal. It was why he was still chasing Neil to the present day, though Neil suspected that even death wouldn’t stop Nathan Wesninski from tracking down and murdering his son.

It was in Millport that he met a face he would recognise even if he didn’t have photographs and drawings and letters from the man it belonged to. Kevin Day, formerly known to Neil as Cóemgein in their younger years, had been a part of Neil’s journey, having crossed paths many times. There was something in Kevin’s face that made Neil know he recognised him too, though he didn’t say anything.

“Damnit Minyard, this is why we can’t have nice things.” the man who’d chased Neil exclaimed as he caught up to the fast boy. Neil had been stunned, even hurt, by the fact that one of Kevin’s teammates had whacked a heavy piece of wood into his stomach. Neil knew why they were here, and it took every inch of his being - which wasn’t a lot - to decline their request to join the team. Neil didn’t understand why Kevin had been so stupid to recruit him, or why Kevin’s mother had created the sport that they were here to get to Neil to play. The publicity Exy had recieved almost immediately after being created was spread worldwide, and Neil thought that surely their secret of immortality would be outed. But then Kevin’s mother, Kayleigh, had died in a car accident, and Neil knew that Kevin was put into the spotlight more than ever. He looked twenty-one, but Neil knew he was over three hundred years old, and even older than Neil.

“What should I call you?” Kevin asked once the two had been left alone. Kevin had asked his coach to leave them so he could convince Neil to join them. “Which name do you go by these days?” Kevin had known Neil throughout many phases of his long life - he’d known him as Alexander, Dimitri, Christopher, and even Stefan - though the two hadn’t met in the past five decades. “I am sorry to hear of your mother’s death.” Kevin said, polite as always. Neil nodded once and sighed.

“As I am to hear of yours,” Neil matched Kevin’s tone, who nodded in response. “You can call me Neil.” Kevin nodded again, clearly realising how close it was to his first name as Neil knew it was. “And as much as I hate it, I will agree to join you. I’ve spent two centuries running from my father and his sadistic ways. I want to finally live for once.” Neil gestured around him. “This. This has not been living. This was surviving.” Kevin smiled grimly and clapped Neil on the shoulder, guiding him out of the room. The injury Kevin had obtained almost a year ago was very real. He had been injured badly, and though it would heal, as all immortal wounds would eventually - unless they were terribly life-endangering - it was clear Kevin had made it seem his wound was worse than the reality of it in order to keep up public appearance.

The next time Neil saw Kevin it was at the Foxhole Court. Shortly after arriving, the man who’d joined Kevin and David Wymack to recruit Neil, invited him to a club in Columbia. His name was Andrew Minyard, and Neil, who’d never had much of an interest in anyone romantically, found this man attractive. He didn’t know how to explain it, but after two centuries of reading and running, and being devoid of emotions except for fear and the constant need to keep moving, Neil thought it might be love. His mother had drilled into him the fact that he’d never be able to have a relationship with anyone who wasn’t like them. He’d tried with Kevin a few times when they’d met, but found neither of them felt that way about the other. 

The next few months were full of keeping secrets, playing Kevin’s mother’s game, and trying to survive while figuring out his feelings for Andrew. By the time he cemented the words ‘I Love You’ into his brain and was about to speak them to Andrew, Neil was kidnapped. It wasn’t the first time, and Neil doubted it would be the last with his father still alive. He’d been dragged to Baltimore, which hadn’t been named Baltimore when Neil was young, and tortured by both his father and his right-hand Lola Malcolm. One of the unlikeliest of saviors had found Neil - his uncle Stuart. His mother’s brother. 

“Nathaniel?” Stuart had said. After hearing ‘Neil’ for years, it was enough to make the boy wince. “Where’s your mother?” he asked desperately. Neil only shook his head. Stuart’s face turned to stone and he motioned for his ment to kill Neil’s father. Neither of them flinched with the way Nathan’s boy was hit with bullets and fell to the floor, and Neil couldn’t help but release a breath. Another thing was climbing up his throat, and soon enough, his food from the day before was on the floor. It was like a weight was lifted off Neil’s shoulders, though he didn’t know what that was. He soon passed out, and woke up in a hospital.

Two FBI agents told him that they had questions for him, though Neil refused to speak to any of them until he saw his team. Until he saw Andrew, really, but he wouldn’t tell either of them that. “They’ve probably gone home already,” one of them said to Neil. He laughed at that. Despite everything, Neil knew it was his father’s laugh. He told them that they wouldn’t leave without him. Refused to believe that Andrew or Kevin would leave without him. But Kevin had. Many times. Andrew was Neil’s only hope at something permanently temporary.

They eventually agreed to let Neil see his team, and as soon as he saw Kevin, the other man’s eyes went wide. “Neil,” he said. “You’re, you’re mortal.” Neil was confused. Kevin switched over to French, one of the many languages the two spoke. “I can feel it around you. You don’t have the aura of an immortal anymore.” Neil knew instantly that was what he’d felt as he’d thrown up the day before. His curse was lifted. “Also,” Kevin continued. “Your mother told me on one of our passings that she’d connected you and your father’s life; if one of you died, the other would become mortal.” Neil scanned the small hotel room for the man he most wanted to see, and then heard the door open. He turned his head and saw Andrew dragging their coach behind him. They were handcuffed together, but Neil jerked forward on unsteady feet and grabbed Andrew’s face in his hands. Andrew didn’t recoil. A good sign. Neil took that as the Yes it was and kissed him. They’d had a ‘nothing’ for months, something Neil hadn’t been against, since he knew that Andrew would grow old and Neil would never, but now there was opportunity for whatever they had to be a ‘something’. This was all Neil wanted, and he was never letting go.

[defensefilms]

You’re Going To See A Different Side Of Me If Joel Embiid Wins MVP

January 30th

I’ve taken it easy. If I was acting the way every one of my impulses was telling me to act, I’d be on the internet looking a fool, trolling every NBA fan page I can find but I’ve held myself back like Tony Soprano!!!!! 

There was a time people legitimately thought this dude was Greg Oden. There was a time people legit thought this man was never going to play an actual NBA game. The 76ers were ridiculed for drafting this man and post season failures against Boston and Toronto, 3 years in a row, gave life to their criticisms. Sixer fans have had to hear it all. From former NBA legends and veterans to TV analysts, everyone took a shot. No one gave Embiid the benefit of the doubt and acknowledged the lack of floor spacing. Everyone expected Hakeem Olajuwon-level domination without ever looking at how Hakeem’s Houston teams were built. He was surrounded by shooters. So when the Sixers brought in new General Manager Darryl Morey, a man intimately familiar with building jump shooting teams, his first order of business was to add jump shooters.

Fast forward to now, let’s bust a count. Embiid is currently averaging 27.7 points, 11 rebounds, 2.8 assists, 1.4 blocks and 54.6% shooting from the field. The intent to dominate is clear and evident. Embiid backed this up again with 37 points, 11 rebounds and 3 assists against the Minnesota Timberwolves this past Friday night. He’s on an absolute tear but that doesn’t mean that all are appreciating the greatness.

By now you know how this goes. This is the NBA and at the cost of common sense, reasoning and even good journalism, the rules of NBA media will be upheld. Which means someone, who is paid to know better, is going to talk nonsense.

Step up to the plate Fox Sports’ Chris Broussard, who, the morning after the Sixers beat the Lakers in glorious fashion, went on to First Things First with Nick Wright and started talking all kinds of nonsense about how Embiid is “underutilized”. The criticisms that Broussard levelled at Embiid were the exact things he has worked on. Does Broussard not see Embiid posting people up? I guess we’re going to ignore Embiid’s career high in usage percentage? I don’t even understand what the media does anymore. The beat reporters, I have no issue with because they don’t have the liberty to select narratives. Some of these TV analysts don’t watch the games and they are starting to admit this more and more. This isn’t even the first time Broussard has been caught slipping but I’m off that.

 Here’s a nice 17 minute video of Joel Embiid post moves for the non believers. And here’s another one, for those that insist on posting up being a brute force affair and these are Embiid’s highlights against the Lakers. Embiid went to the free-throw line 13 times in that game so make of that what you will. 

Back to Embiid though, this man is on an absolute dominant run and very well could be the first center since Tim Duncan (if you count him as a center) or Shaquile O’neal, to win MVP. Without doubt the most dominant big man since either of those guys retired. 

However the man that Embiid has truly patterned his game after is Hakeem “The Dream” Olajuwon.  During the post game interview of the Timberwolves game on Friday night, Embiid actually goes in to detail regarding his approach to drawing fouls. Here’s the 10 minute clip of the presser and he starts talking about getting fouled in the last 3 minutes or so. Indeed you’re seeing that reflected in his numbers as well where he’s averaging a career high in free throw attempts at 10.1 per game. That’s a telling stat when we’re talking about low post scorers. For example, all of Hakeem Olajuwon’s highest scoring seasons came when he was able to get fouled at least 7 times per game. It’s fun hearing Joel talk this way and those Olajuwon comparisons are especially eerie when you hear this. He mentions making defenders “pick their poison” and that’s how you know he’s reaching the highest levels of sophistication when it comes to his post game. 

Check out this here piece of internet gold. It’s a clip of Hakeem Olajuwon demonstrating post moves, followed by clips of him executing the same moves during games throughout his career. Watch how he always understands where his defender is and what his defender is taking away based on his body positioning. He is always making the defender “pick his poison” and his technique is so great, so perfect, that he can find and take the shot that his man cannot possibly guard at the exact instant his man is most susceptible to that shot. If he drives to the basket and his man is diligent and is able to contest near the rim, he’ll stop, fake, spin and find ample room to get a jumping hook finish. Books should be written about Hakeem’s post-scoring technique in the same way books were written about Coach John Wooden. No jokes. 

So check out these Joel Embiid December highlights/compilation. In literally the opening clip, Embiid is guarded by Orlando Magic center, Nikola Vucevic. Embiid intitiates, as all good centers do, by getting post position and once he gets the ball, he faces up Vucevic who gets in the golden chair position. Embiid takes one bounce to Vucevic’s outside, which is Vucevic’s left and Vuc does a good job of staying in front of Embiid and guarding the drive attempt but Embiid stops and spins to Vuceviç’s right and Embiid gets a dunk at the rim with his right hand. That’s the kind of tet-a-tet, pick your poison approach to low post scoring that effectively means there are no right answers for defenders and that makes a center un-guardable. 

A lot of this probably has to do with the era that we’re in but we’re not seeing the right level of appreciation for what this man is doing. When Steph Curry was on his run there was nothing but chatter about how great he is. Russell Wesbrook was praised to the high heavens for his triple-double MVP run. James Harden was elevated to superstar status for performing an entire season of the craftiest, grimiest, low-down, foul drawing tactics and even he had a bunch of media carrying his water. What those guys have in common is that their styles of play are more eye catching and even in Harden’s case people like watching him shoot. I have to wonder whether the voting media will allow aesthetics to sway their decision because it almost happened to Giannis Antetokounmpo. What I want to know is where is the pro-Joel media and why aren’t we hearing more from them? ESPN’s Max Kellerman is appearing to fight the just fight. So for once, the city of Philly is actually gonna have to ride with him and forget about the Carson Wentz nonsense. Other than that, Embiid’s competition in the MVP race, LeBron James and Kevin Durant, will have far better representation in the television media. Embiid leads the race at the moment but we do not have as much time left as we would in a normal, non-covid season. It’ll be interesting to see how it goes but I’m backing my guy on this. 

Here’s a cool Joel Embiid-Hakeem Olajuwon Video compilation and here’s the coolest video complilation of Joel Embiid scoring.