#And I tried to go to the transsexual tag it was like

[midnight-soulless-system]

Google actually considers transsexual as an inappropriate website, it's so sad but also hilarious

[spookygingerr]

Weekly Tag Wednesdayyy!

Thank you @piefrans ur sooo amazing for sending me this blank bc of my copy and pasting difficulties. ur also just the bestest ever. what a slay of a human being.

also thanks for the tags Evie @energievie, Kaka @stocious, Jess @jrooc and Pie @piefrans

Name: alice

Age: nosho - 11 months + 34 days

Location: wouldn’t u like to know

And now...

What is your DJ name? i would be the worst dj. i’d just make u listen to my music all the time.

If you were a genre of music, what would it be? i was written by taylor swift

What would you title your biography? professional yapper

What are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? dance like nobody’s watching, dance more, and a little bit more

What subject do you wish was taught in every school? either critical thinking or philosophy. i just think everyone should have the opportunity to learn how to think for themselves.

also. i wish they actually taught us where things are in geography.

When was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? i recently started weight training at the gym, about 3 months ago

What is the most underrated city you have ever visited? i’m really not a city person, i do love Whitby but it’s a town. still people don’t talk about Whitby enough so that’s my final answer. it’s my fave place in the UK

What day in your life would you like to relive? i don’t have a specific day in mind but i’d love to relive a childhood christmas with all my family when it was all still magical. i’m not a christmas fan now, for reasons, so i’d love to go back to when it was fun.

If you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why?

i wish i could just click my fingers and be washed and dressed with makeup and hair done like sabrina the teenage witch.

How long would you last in a zombie apocalypse?

an hour

What would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable?

science isn’t really my strong suit

If you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose?

under the sea. i love sea creatures.

this one was really different and fun!! thanks @energievie !!!

im tagging…

@transmickey @creepkinginc @transmurderbug @transsexual-dandelions @em-harlsnow @heymacy @mybrainismelted @jademickian @astaraels @roryonic @doshiart @deathclassic @mickeym4ndy @sgtmickeyslaughter @callivich @ian-galagher @crossmydna @lee-ow @burninface @sleepyheadgallavich @mickittotheman @thepupperino @vintagelacerosette @spacerockwriting @sam-loves-seb @pookiebearmick @chicanomick @blue-disco-lights @especially-fuk-u

[burninface]

Weekly Tag Wednesday!

thank you for tagging me @deedala @lingy910y and @samantitheos !!

name: face

age: 23

astrological sign: 🏹

upon which continent do you reside: asia

tell us how you're feeling right now using 3-5 emojis: 😶🍫🎮⏰

whats your favorite flavor of gum? blueberry

whats the last movie you watched? poor things, and it's not really my thing…

what was your worst subject in high school? history, I really couldn't handle it when it came with politics

whats the job you stayed at for the shortest period of time? I'm on my first job now so I have nothing to compare with? maybe get paid by helping my professor managing her online shop lol

whats your favorite thing to do at an amusement park? eating cotton candy!!

what condiments go on top of the perfect hot dog (meat or plant-based)? I have never had vegan hot dog before but I would like to try one day! and idk?? I don't usually eat hotdog, the few times I eat it I just put various vegetables on top and add random sauce on it (only tried mustard, ketchup and hot sauce), no combination can be called perfect so far. guess I'll check everyone's answer later and take notes of all recommendations 📝

cincinnati chili, thoughts? just googled this and it looks delicious, but it's not easy to find in my area so maybe I'll try to make it myself someday

do you sleep with a plushie? yes! a sharkitty (a big shark with four cat paws), my bestie gave it to me as my birthday gift and I love it sm

how do you feel about thunderstorms? I only love thunderstorms at late night, cause I find them inspiring and they can create an unique atmosphere, but I don't like them when I'm trying to sleep

what's the last animal you touched? does insect count? if yes, a beetle, I was trying to remove it from one of the instruments at my workplace. if no, a stray dog near my home who showed her belly to me for rubs.

grab the nearest item with words on it that ISNT a book and tell me the final word: "soak", from the tags on my jacket

you ever forgotten to do an assignment until the night before its due? yes it happened

I'm tagging @transsexual-dandelions @em-harlsnow @deathclassic @sluttygallavich @thepupperino @vintagelacerosette @creepkinginc @piefrans @mickeym4ndy @spookygingerr @mmmichyyy @blue-disco-lights @doshiart @atthedugouts hi there my mutual friends, have a nice day!!

[thepupperino]

Weekly Tag Wednesday

Helloooo I was tagged by @spookygingerr, @sgtmickeyslaughter, and @deedala this week--thank you!

What is your current hair like? I like to think it's blonde but yesterday someone told me that it's not which made me sad, and it's like a couple inches past my collarbone? And a middle part because I was influenced by the gen zers

What is your natural hair like? This is it

What’s your favorite hair style/color you’ve had? I miss Florida because my hair was so light from being in the sun all the time

What hair style/color do you find most attractive on other people? (if you have a preference) I do not know that I care

What’s your biggest hair regret? Either when I got bangs last year or in middle school when I tried to dye my hair brown and it turned red

What’s the longest your hair has ever been? Belly button length

What’s the shortest your hair has ever been? ? A bob probably

What’s your go to style when you’re due a hair wash? PONYTAIL

Tags below :)

@transsexual-dandelions @transmurderbug @transmickey @sleepyfacetoughguy @sleepyheadgallavich

@gallapiech @celestialmickey @too-schoolforcool @crossmydna @heymrspatel

@look-i-love-u @energievie @mybrainismelted @jrooc @lee-ow

@purplemagpie @bawlbrayker @deathclassic @creepkinginc @flamingbluepanda

@gallafics @iandarling @darlingian @ian-galagher @lingy910y

@lupeloto @palepinkgoat @pookiebearmick @vintagelacerosette @whatthebodygraspsnot

@wehangout @whaticameherefor @takeyourpillsbitchh @xninetiestrendx @zutaralesbian

[sam-loves-seb]

weekly tag wednesday

thanks to my lovelies for the tags <3 @spookygingerr @transsexual-dandelions @deedala @heymacy @gallawitchxx

name: sam

age: 26

location: home of the 2024 nba champions

and now...

what is your DJ name? dj sammy spins

if you were a genre of music, what would it be? indie rock

what would you title your biography? what the hell is going on (seriously can somebody tell me)

what are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? steal some shit, probably commit some other non-violent crimes, then maybe try and uncover some state secrets

what subject do you wish was taught in every school? literally copy and pasting bee and so many others but: financial literacy !! i still feel like i know nothing !! also on a less serious note: world geography, because it has taken me a shockingly long time to figure out where some things in the world actually rae

when was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? a few weeks ago i tried a new beverage of the alcoholic variety called Sun Cruisers and they were quite good

what is the most underrated city you have ever visited? davos, switzerland (probably not that underrated to some but i had never even heard of it before i went and now i think about it constantly)

what day in your life would you like to relive? the last day of school before spring break during my senior year of college. it was a friday, i had no classes, i spent most of the day with my roommates hanging out and that night we got tipsy and watched mamma mia and jumped on the couch and scream-sang all the songs

little did we know that a week later the world would end.

i went to florida for 5 days for spring break and when i came back, the dorms were closed, classes were online, and everything was completely shut down starting monday because of covid. we had to move all our stuff out, and i never lived with those roommates again. we're all still friends, but i rarely see them because we live far apart.

this answer got away from me but yeah. that last day with my perfect roommates in our perfect apartment dorm. that's the day i'd relive if i had the chance.

if you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why? showering. it's so tedious. i know it needs to be done but god it's so much effort. why can't i be instantly clean?

how long would you last in a zombie apocalypse? honestly i think i would last pretty long in a zombie apocalypse if i tried, but the more important question is would i want to last in a zombie apocalypse? probably not. is there an end in sight? a cure? is this just the world now? i think my survival skills are high but my will to live is low in this scenario

what would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable? if scientists figured out teleportation i think that would be the most shocking thing to me

if you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose? a city view. i want an office in a high rise that overlooks boston. that would be cool.

tagging anyone who hasn't played yet cuz it's almost technically thursday by now <3

[deathclassic]

tag game wednesday, thursday, friday? idk what time it is

thank you so much for tagging me, it really means a lot.

@energievie @stocious @gallapiech @spookygingerr

@transsexual-dandelions @mickeym4ndy @heymacy @wehangout

@mybrainismelted and @sgtmickeyslaughter <3

name: molly

age: 25

location: australia, you can figure out where

what is your dj name? the dj name generator gave me 'jackets and hats'

if you were a genre of music, what would it be? oh metalcore 100%

what would you title your biography? all our gods have abandoned us

what are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? mild crimes, go to concerts, travel

what subject do you wish was taught in every school? how to be an adult 101

when was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? um not sure, i guess i had to make a complaint to my manager about being shouted at by a customer so that was a first?

what is the most underrated city you have ever visited? hobart is quite nice

what day in your life would you like to relive? probably february 27th 2014, soundwave music festival, first music festival ever and got to see some incredible bands that day,,,,green day, a day to remember, mayday parade, asking alexandria, avenged sevenfold, motionless in white, black veil brides, alkaline trio, panic at the disco, rob zombie, placebo,,,,,,so many great bands

if you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why? idk why but brushing my hair, it's easy to brush but i hate doing it

how long would you last in a zombie apocalypse? oh id die instantly

what would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable? proof of more mythical creatures???

if you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose? the forest, or the bush

dont think anyone wants to be tagged by me rn sooooo

[bardnuts]

I saw your tags on my Durge/Durge art, and I had to come over and ask you about your OC! I was a creep and tried to just look around your blog but I’m a sucker for lore. I wanted to pop by and just ask about them - Though I see you have something on AO3 if I’m not mistaken, so I may hop over there and peak. 😀 🎶

OHHH my god yes I have a thing about collecting bard durges because I think it's such an inherently funny combination but also if you do it right you get to make a genuinely frightening bard--which is, also, conceptually kind of hilarious.

idk exactly how to summarize Twill at short notice except that Orin hit him so hard he turned into a clown. He was a Whispers bard before he joined the Temple of Bhaal, but also in my version of things the Temple of Bhaal is sort of a Spirit Halloween vibes-wise, so he was never really that scary (aside from the wanton murder and unchecked necrophilia I mean). He's sort of a perpetually sweaty transsexual human man with an inexplicable charisma score of 22. I've had friends describe him as Harrier DuBois with Problems.

He did use the nickname "Dirge" before Orin bashed his brains in, but mainly so he wouldn't have to put down restaurant reservations as "The Dark Urge" while there's an active serial killer investigation going on. He likes wordplay, but nobody spelled it right anyway.

Thank you soooo much for asking because I have like a 30-minute essay about him cocked and loaded at any given time.

[femboymilkovich]

another tag game im catching up on whos shocked!!!!!!!

tagged by @spookygingerr @transsexual-dandelions @heymacy and @iansw0rld for this one, doubling up below with a similar one!

Name: sarah

Age: 29

Location: bumfuck california

And now...

What is your DJ name? Dj anxiety probably im always anxious lmfao

If you were a genre of music, what would it be? sleep token x deftones x chappell roan?????? yeah

What would you title your biography? what the fuuuuuuuuuuck??????????

What are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? steal some shit, cause some mayhem and then dance like an idiot

What subject do you wish was taught in every school? oh i dont know, how to budget, how to run a house etc like more life skills that are actually important!!!!!!

When was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? uhhhhhhhhh drawing a blank here......... or well.....its not family friendly ehehehe gonna leave it at that lolllllll

What is the most underrated city you have ever visited? uhhhh yeah no clue

What day in your life would you like to relive? getting married? uh the birth of my kids. yeah

If you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why?

oh my god laundry fuck that shitttttttt

How long would you last in a zombie apocalypse?

an hour maybe id probably off myself and save myself the panicked hysteria

What would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable?

science isn’t really my strong suit (stealing you answer alice lol)

If you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose?

oh the forest! i love trees and woods and yeah

and now this one from @spookygingerr @thepupperino @transsexual-dandelions and @iansw0rld

rules: list 3 things you’re excited about for today.

I'm going to pride on the 29th!

I ordered myself a new shirt for said pride event

its friday!!!!!!!

not tagging anyone else since ive already tagged a bunch while catching up and i dont wanna be annoying lol

okay love you byeeeeeeeeeeee

[moved-please-leave-me-alone]

this is so random but i saw your tags on that one post about music lore can i have a weird weezer fact . multiple if you'd like

He has once starved himself for an entire day just to see what it'd do to his songwriitng process. This resulted in the song Hold Me

He has written 2 songs he claims to be about gay sex. I say claims because Rivers FUCKING Cuomo tends to just. Say shit a lot. But there is one that is way more explicitly about gay sex. The supposed gay sex song [more specifically one he took 3 shots of vodka and a pill of ritalin to write supposedly about gay transsexual prostitute sex] is Hash Pipe, which has no officially released lyrics which has spawned entire conspircies. The one that's more obviously about gay sex is about gay drug addicted prostitute sex, and is One More Hit, with an oh-so-infamous pre-chorus.

Speaking of gay Weezer, in 2016 when he was making the white album, Rivers FUCKING Cuomo made a tinder account to go on [platonic] dates with men and women for new song ideas. His wife was perfectly fine with this, apparently.

For the third Spongebob movie, he made a song based off one of his most famous demos, and just replaced some words with Spongebob things

He tried to make a space-themed rock opera, but scrapped that for Pinkerton. Not really a fun fact I just want people to listen to Songs From The Black Hole

I have more but my memory loss is unfortunately stronger than my autism which is FUCKED. UP. but also thanks for asking :3

[discyours]

What made you decide to stop being a transmed?

This was already in my FAQ tag

I got exposed to some of the flaws in their logic around the same time that I got fed up with the community’s negative mindset. The world health organisation reclassified transsexualism to be a sexual health condition rather than a mental illness, and everyone I was following was crying about how tucutes got their way and made it impossible to access medical transition, how trans people are now in the same category as pedophiles, and how transsexualism was no longer classified as a health condition at all, none of which are or were true and it would’ve been extremely easy to figure that out by reading past the headlines. They wanted to be miserable, they wanted to be outraged, they wanted to be victimised.  As for the flaws in their logic, a radfem messaged me (back when I was still strongly “anti terf”) and got me around to the idea of neuroplasticity. That reduced my faith in the idea that transness was caused by being born with a brain that has “the wrong sex”, especially after I tried to bring up these concerns and got the same response transmeds always provide - walls of links to studies with little to no relevance to the point, which nobody ever actually reads.  At that point I left the community, and the more time has passed the more critical I’ve gotten of transmed ideology. I’ve never been able to access medical transition but I did seem like a “tru trans” to the transmed community. They convinced me that if I was truly trans, I had no other options and I would be miserable for the rest of my life/might as well kill myself. The idea that my dysphoria was rigid, essentially incurable and Meant Something (not just “I feel discomfort in my body” but “I am in the wrong body”) made it so much worse for me, and I couldn’t start healing until I somewhat let go off those ideas. Also I reidentified and it hasn’t killed me so, there’s that. I guess I still agree with them that transition should not be as readily available as it currently is, but I don’t believe that any of the barriers they propose will be able to keep out anyone who would regret transition, and I don’t think that transition is beneficial to everyone they label as Truly Trans. 

[burninface]

🍾Weekly Tag Wednesday Friday🎉

FINALLY, after overtime work for three days straight, I can leave work on time and have time to finish all the interesting tag games 😇 it's a 3 in 1 post so:

first thaaaanks for tagging me ling @lingy910y , Al🧊 @spookygingerr, dean @transsexual-dandelions , deanna @deedala , sarah @atthedugouts 💖

name: face

age: it’s year of loong🐉 and 🐉 is my animal sign

location: bed

what is your dj name? well… hddnd, pronounce upside-down puppy

if you were a genre of music, what would it be? Fusion, a little bit of this, a little bit of that

what would you title your biography? Random Dream Generator

what are the first three things you'd do if you were invisible? It sounds boring and nerdy😴: 1)test out the how invisible I am, will all my metabolic substances also be invisible. 2)test what will happen if I intake some drink or food, or use skincare. 3)find out how would I look like in mirror/camera/photos

what subject do you wish was taught in every school? adulting classes and death education, maybe sex education and mental health too.

when was the last time you tried something for the first time and what was it? I tried osmanthus cheese ice cream today (I just picked out the box from my trash bin to check the English title lol), it tastes… meh😌

what is the most underrated city you have ever visited? I don't know? I never check much negative comments about a city before I go there...?

what day in your life would you like to relive? If I can relive it as my recent self, then maybe the day I birthed. if I can only relive it as my past self, then none of them.

if you could eliminate one thing from your daily routine, what would it be and why? Picking up my hair all around my home😩

how long would you last in a zombie apocalypse? Depends, if it’s bite-you-and-you-die kind of zombie, about a week I guess (with all my skill learnt from zombie games lol). If it’s bite-you-and-you-become-zombie kind, at first day I’ll be bitten (out of curious) and I’ll try my best to write down how it felt like to become a zombie.

what would be the most surprising scientific discovery imaginable? I’m actually living in my dream and my dreams are my real lives neuron regeneration/ braindance (physical sensations, emotions, and thoughts recording technic in cyberpunk2077, but ethically it may won’t be achieved)

if you could have any view out your office window, what would you choose? As far as it’s natural scenery, I’m ok with it

🎊pinterest tag game🎊

thank you Al, deanna, nosho @creepkinginc , julia @blue-disco-lights , tee @mickeym4ndy for tagging me💕

rules: search up fashion, pantone, mood, and food on pinterest and then save the first picture that comes up.

that outfit looks like smth I'll be interested in enough to try out in the shop but then never choose to buy. and that pantone pic is just…… so me. and I got the same mood pic with tee! the last one, not a fan of green onion😬

🍦positivity tag game🍟

thank you Al🧊, ling and keely @thepupperino for tagging me do this💝

rules: list 3 things you’re excited about for today.

1 after overtime work for three days straight, I finally can leave work on time! 2 I finally left work on time! 3 I LEFT WORK ON TIME!

Ok, just kidding 😗

1 after overtime work for three days straight, I finally can leave work on time! 2 ELDEN RING Shadow of the Erdtree released today! 3 Adam Lambert has a new song cvnty released on today too!

No tagging anyone since I'm late but just go ahead if you want to do any of these games!

[thepupperino]

Weekly Tag Wednesday

Hiiiii everyone! Thank you to @sgtmickeyslaughter, @catgrassplantdad, and @spookygingerr for the tags!

Name: Keely

Location: Utah :(

Age: 29

You have an unexpected extra day off work or school!  What are you going to do? SLEEP IN and hang out with my husband and dogs and watch TV or a movie

What is your favorite way to spend a summer day? Please I'm such a boring person...if I'm with people I love I'm happy

What is your favorite way to spend a winter day? Please see above and add hot chocy

What do you do to unwind at the end of the day? Chill out on the couch, watch a show or a movie, watch tiktoks, sometimes I'll write if I'm motivated and/or inspired

Do you play any sports? No :( I tried to join a cheerleading squad and tore my ACL at the second practice and now I've been scared away

Other than fanfic, what is your favorite genre to read? Please I don't read. Cutie queer romance (so like fanfic but not)

What is your comfort movie/tv show? It used to be Saw III but I've grown a little sick of it. Survivor is good to pass the time. Gallavich Scenes master playlist on youtube. Now accepting recommendations for comfort media

Do you write or draw? I write a little bit sometimes. Art is amazing to me I wish I had a shred of talent

What other arts or crafts do you do? Uh I know how to crochet but I haven't touched it in months. I want to start scrapbooking?

Describe your perfect breakfast: I'm not a huge breakfast girly but @too-schoolforcool and @celestialmickey and I went to this beautiful place for brunch last week and I want to order my little cloud iced latte again and I've got a hankerin for some french toast right now

Tags below :)

@sleepyfacetoughguy @deedala @sleepyheadgallavich @mybrainismelted @stocious

@transsexual-dandelions @transmurderbug @transmickey @creepkinginc @jrooc

@iandarling @darlingian @ianmickgallagher @mickeym4ndy @depressedstressedlemonzest

@bawlbrayker @crossmydna @hazeisblue @jademickian @lingy910y

@mick-ian @palepinkgoat @piefrans @pookiebearmick @themarchg1rl

@vintagelacerosette @whatthebodygraspsnot @wehangout @xninetiestrendx @look-i-love-u

[transhorrors]

holds mic out... actually there's nothing i would love more than hearing you talk about fandom's views of how trans men are allowed to exist in both fandom and transformative works :)

bestie............... thank you

honestly, doesn't it always come back to a/b/o and mpreg? and i felt this way before i was consciously trans and it's only gotten more pronounced as i've pushed forward into the non-fanworks world of fiction writing. there's a distinct lack of trans characters in both, but there is an especially noticeable lack of visibility and representation for ftm/transmasculine characters. i've speculated a lot about why this is (best i can come up with is the societal fear of a surprise phallus is greater than the surprise of a lack thereof, but this is a really hard thing to articulate and incredibly nuanced, and it'll take me way off topic), but people in general are just incredibly adverse to writing trans male characters, in particular trans male adults. adults who hold positions of power and adults who have sex and adults who fuck up.

and trust me: i have tried to read a/b/o. i have tried to understand the appeal. but i'm just like, goddamn, why are so many girlies choosing wet ass when you could just write a trans character and fucking have your cake and eat it too! trans men have dicks, natural and surgically! if you're that obsessed with needing two cocks, you can still have that with a trans character, and you don't need this gross, cissexist trope that requires ass pregnancies.

and that segues nicely into how fandom writes characters when they are actually written as trans which is... still woof. because it's never just normal. 80% of it is pregnancy whump, "woe to me, for i, a transsexual, am pregnant, and this is the worst thing that could ever happen to me". obviously there's nuance to this (hell, when i was a teen i wrote a polyam series where my trans character got pregnant. i also wrote a lot more porn than angst, though, it wasn't just endless angst), but when that's all there is?? and when it's not pregnancy angst, it's g or t-rated, which, fine, whatever, but why can't we have casual pwps? why is it so hard to get casual explicit stuff with a ftm character? fandom is full of all kinds of weird porn, but i have actually gotten yelled at by Fandom Girls for asking why people write a/b/o over making a character ftm lol.

obligatory "if people aren't comfortable writing trans characters, i would obviously rather ignore their weird cis porn than have to suffer through shitty trans fetishization". but also. people should learn how to write trans characters, in fandom and in general. a character can (and, imo, should) be trans without that being the whole plot. the problem is trans people still exist primarily as inspiration/tragedy porn in the cisgender eyeballs, and so we don't get to just... be a character. we don't get to have casual sex or get put into cutesy little au's or any of that.

(that's also why i'm happy that my chris/adrian series has been doing well because like..... this is not meant as shade to anyone in the ao3 tag. but right now, besides me, there's, like, 2 other trans adrian fics that i would go back and reread. everything else is a/b/o, and one tagged as "mpreg" that i refuse to touch on principle. but the two good ones are i think both t-rated. we have far more fic for breeding kink, which, fine, whatever. and i really want other people to write trans adrian, because i think combining his obsession with identity makes him FASCINATING to write as trans, and i want people to get fun and freaky with explicit stuff like they do when they write him as cis, but also i trust a maximum of 5 or 6 writers to do that decently. and at this point, i've dissected and analyzed so much fucking trans media that i just emotionally and mentally cannot. spare the time of day for people who are still doing it objectively wrong. lol)

[arandomuser17]

Thank you so much for the tag! :))

1. Are you named after anyone?

No, my parents chose my name completely by chance, lol

2. When was the last time you cried?

Like yesterday, for an exam ://

3. Do you have kids?

No

4. Do you use sarcasm?

It depends on the context, but usually yes, I do

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Probably the eyes, the gaze. It's something that I always find peculiar about people.

6. What's your eye colour?

Hazel brown :)

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I like them both, lol

8. Any special skills?

Mmh, I'd say making a mess every time I try to cook something..../hj Although I always manage to eat something good, lol

9. Where were you born?

In the South of Italy :D

10. What are your hobbies?

Mmh, I love reading, taking photos, going for a walk and exploring the corners of this city :)

11. Do you have any pets?

Well, I used to take care of my grandparents' pets... But now I've moved away, so I haven't been really seeing them :(

12. What sports do/have you played?

Currently I do karate, which I've been into for a few years. When I was a kid, I also tried swimming (which I loved) and dance (which I absolutely hate)

13. How tall are you?

1.73 metres

14. Favourite subject in school?

I never kinda had a favourite subject... I loved almost everything I studied. Now I can't wait to study astrophysics at uni :)

15. Dream job?

Aerospace engineer!

I'm tagging (but no pressure): @transsexual-isopod-god @rue-cimon @bog-o-mine @romanticvampire @low-wisdom @my-ancient-marss @arbielikestrains @thegyusorcerer @artemis-aro @panicking-skywalker @transgender-rex and anyone who wants to do it! :)

Thank you for the tag @ohmeowmy ^_^

1. Are you named after anyone?

I don't think so. Never heard my parents say they had any reasoning for my name. My online name is not after anyone either.

2. When was the last time you cried?

A few days ago (not that common of an occurrence though, last time before that was a few months ago I think)

3. Do you have kids?

No

4. Do you use sarcasm?

Very rarely

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Very first thing is probably their clothes. Also I notice sort of how they are holding themselves and their general demeanor.

6. What's your eye color?

glasses wearer

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

I like happy endings but also sad endings.

8. Any special skills?

pretty good pattern recognition (from autism lol). tbh this is even more of a factor in me being good at academics than having a good memory is.

9. Where were you born?

on Earth

10. What are your hobbies?

Mostly just math, I read textbooks or do problems in my free time. I also like reading other things, but I'm sort of slow at it because I pause and think and try to remember everything I read. I like birds and birdwatching. I play piano. also tumblr if it counts as a hobby

11. Do you have any pets?

Yes. (sorry not saying their names or whatever for infosec reasons)

12. What sports do/have you played?

Currently none. For many years I did dancing (and it was the only sport I was actually good at at like a competition level) and tennis (was shit at). Also did swimming but quit because I hate wearing a swimsuit and being wet.

13. How tall are you?

not sure

14. Favorite subject in school?

My favorite subject like in general is math of course. It was really boring/easy at school though, and obv this is just my perspective and what different people find easy or challenging differs. but for myself I found it really understimulating. I'd say my favorite subjects in high school were chem and geography (because that's where I felt I learned any significant amount and also sorta geography-adjacent stuff is some of my special interests so yeah).

15. Dream job?

research mathematician

no pressure tags: @gogocactus @klavierpanda @horse-music @jbis @felipe-kuso @igotmyionyou32 @biblicallyaccurateryo @girlmicrowave @thesimstwo @our-summer-is-winter and anyone else who wants

[vaspider]

Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I tagged you in a reply I wrote to a post about transandrophobia, because I thought that you may have more info/opinion to input.

If you don't want to/can't respond or anything, that's totally fine! I just know that you probably know more about the issue than I do and that you've talked about transandrophobia before.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know so that you didn't feel like, idk pressured? Caught off guard?

Hope you have a nice day <3

Yeah, the reason I didn't see it before now is that the OP apparently has me blocked, which, whatever, but I don't feel pressured to respond to anything. I will if I want to or I won't if I don't want to. Anyway, here's what I had to say: You covered it pretty well, and it's fucking exhausting to see people talk like trans men/transmascs don't have experiences that we go through that trans women/transfemmes don't go through.

We could call it 'Tuesday problems' or 'transmascantagonism' or 'Steve' and there would be a problem with that, though, because the issue is not that we used "the wrong word" to talk about these specific issues that we have as a community and as individuals, the problem is that we are daring to talk about them as problems at all. We tried calling it transmisandry, we called it transandromisia briefly, we called it ... lots of things. But the problem isn't really that the word is bad, it's that we're daring to actually say "actually, we're not collateral damage in this, it's not okay to just brush off our problems, and you can't just sit there and say that we don't have specific problems which are unique to our experience."

And it is FUCKING WILD that the OP thinks that the concept of putting a prefix on an existing word is like, what, stolen from transfemmes? Are you fucking kidding me? All of our community words are compound words. The concept of transmisogyny is 'taken from' transgender, which was 'taken from' transsexual, which was 'taken from' the fact that Latin words get turned into compounds in order to express complex concepts, you absolute fucking cabbage. Nobody 'stole' or 'took' the concept of making compound words from anyone else. That's nothing that transfemmes can have, like, jurisdiction over. 'Misogyny' is a compound word too, and if you're going to start slinging around accusations that something was 'taken,' why aren't you making up another word to talk about transmisogyny, because that was 'taken from' misogyny?

Oh, right, because that's fucking ridiculous, that's why you're not doing that. Because this is just a way to try to delegitimize transmascs talking about our unique struggles without suddenly having other people leaning over our shoulders and saying SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP. That's the actual fucking problem.

That's why this has been a fucking problem literally every time that there's a word to discuss our issues, no matter what that word is or who made it up.

From now on I'm just going to refer to it as 'Tuesday Problems,' which has nothing to do with anything, it's just a random-ass phrase, and see how fucking long it takes people to complain about that.

Except not, bc transmisandry and transandrophobia are both fucking a-ok words, and no one trying to claim jurisdiction over the creation of a Latin compound word is going to stop me from using useful fucking words to describe concepts which require compact and discrete description.

[elsewhereuniversity]

About Face

“Do you have any questions about your prescriptions today, uh…m-miss?” The pharmacist’s question is laced with assumptions about who you are. It’s not great, of course, but it’s also not worth your time to fight about today.

“No, I’m good,” your smile and voice are sugary-sweet, but your eyes are daggers as you take the bag and turn back towards the door. The heat and humidity are already staggering at 8 am and you are immediately made sticky by the brief walk to your car. As you start it up, there’s a brief chime of email-receiving from your phone, but you ignore it. Then there’s another ding, this time your lab-mate, Valerie, texting you.

Hey, u almost in?                                                                                     In like 30min. had to stop by pharmacy

K. Jill was looking for u. Also ugh that paper for tomorrow, I’m not even a  birdsong person lol

Lol get over it, I had to read one of your fancy neuro papers last time. Did jill say what she needed me for?

Whatever lol. She didn’t say.

                                                                        Ughhhhhhh

Jill, Dr. Dominguez, is your advisor, and you know you need to get her some figures and sections of your thesis soon, but these damn stats…well. There’s a reason you prefer spending your time traipsing off-trail through the wilderness over sitting in front of a computer all day. Not that this part isn’t interesting and important too, but come on.

Traffic is moving at a sluggish pace, of course, so you’re lost in contemplation and dread of the analyses you need to attempt running today, and the inevitable conversation with Dr. Dominguez that will have to happen at some point. As the traffic finally begins to move, you grit your teeth. Maybe it’s time to consider actually asking for help. I have no fucking clue how to do multivariate shit…You stare ahead as you inch forward, before a frustrating, jolting stop at a red light. Your eye is drawn to a kid crossing the road, wearing a grey hoodie. They look forlorn, for some reason you can’t entirely enumerate, and you glance back at them as the light finally turns.

The sun isn’t very high yet, so there are still some odd shadows stretching across the sidewalk, but you could’ve sworn that the kid had no face.

****

You manage to put the pharmacist and your grandma and the obviously-just-a-trick-of-the-light-I-mean-how-else-could-that-be faceless kid out of your mind for the rest of the morning and actually get some results you can work with from the analyses you’d been worried about. And when Dr. Dominguez pops into lab to talk to you, she is actually impressed at both the pace and quality of work you’ve delivered thus far. In fact, you’re feeling pretty damn good about everything, despite the earlier unpleasantness, so you decide to grab some lunch and hang out with some of the other grad students and lab techs.

Lunch-special sushi in hand, you plop yourself down at one of the rundown old tables in the work room. Valerie is there, along with Raul, one of the grad students from a micro lab down the hall, and Jackson, one of the general lab techs. Everyone says hi, but you’re only vaguely following the conversation as you dig into your spicy tuna roll. Something something TA stipends being cut. Which is such bullshit, of course, but nothing new. You’re just about to jump into the discussion when you get a Facebook notification. It’s your cousin, who tagged you in a post. You stare for a good five seconds at your phone.

Just remembering the good times with my cousin before he decided to be a transsexual.

And then a picture from when you were 14, a picture you’d thought you’d deleted from every conceivable online location. A picture that highlights pretty much every single aspect of your body that made staying in the closet completely untenable. Everything just always happens at once, huh.

“Fucking asshole,” you mutter, and are surprised to feel the hot prick of tears in your eyes.

“Becca, you alright?” Valerie asks, and you belatedly realize that everyone at the table heard you and is now staring. They think you were talking about one of them, or responding to something they said.

“Uh, yeah, sorry. Just something my cousin posted. She’s—she can be such a jerk. Don’t worry about it,” you say as you hastily wipe away the tears.

“What’d she do?” Jackson asks. Valerie glares at him so fiercely that he rolls his eyes and holds up his hands, “Just, like, if you wanna talk about it.”

You sigh. You’re not precisely going stealth, but you also don’t just talk to everyone about being trans. Have you actually come out to Jackson? Valerie knows, and Raul, but you don’t think you’ve ever directly talked to Jackson about it.

“It’s—it’s fine. Just, she posted a picture of me from before I came out, and I really hate thinking about any of it.” You speak with a bit more force than you intend.

“Why is that a big deal?” Jackson asks, taking a bite of his pasta. Valerie glares at him again and Raul just shakes his head.

“It’s just…it took me a long time to figure it out, and I don’t particularly like being reminded of that. And it’s not great for dysphoria, either.” You say this distractedly as you go to the post and untag yourself.

“That’s really rough,” Raul says, frowning.

“Sorry, what’s that word?” Jackson asks with a raised eyebrow, “I guess I just don’t get it? It’s just a kid picture of you, what’s it matter?”

And that does it. You stand abruptly, “I need to get back to the lab.” You hear Valerie and Raul berating Jackson as you walk away, but you’re just so very done. You toss the empty sushi container in the trash at the corner of the hallway, near one of the windows overlooking the main walkway through campus. And you nearly trip over your own feet as you swivel to double check something down below. A gray hoodie. A child with no face looking over their shoulder as they turn a corner.

****

You don’t mean to take the wrong street. It’s already been far too long a day between all of the inanity with your extended family and Jackson. And everything you tried to run after lunch was a bust, making you feel like Dr. Dominguez’s praise earlier was completely undeserved. Given all of that, you decided to get takeout again, even though you really should be cooking, so you’re walking to pick up your order. It is early evening, the shadows having elongated to embrace nearly everything, and while debating whether it’s even worth confronting your cousin about the jab, your feet simply take you the wrong way. You don’t even notice, until you’re standing in front of an empty park that’s three blocks over from where you should be. Or, wait.

Not empty. One lone figure, sitting quietly on one of the swings, wreathed in shadow.

You’ve been walking quite quickly, but over the course of a few steps have come almost to a stop. With a shiver, you glance around the area, but no parents or adults are in sight, and the figure looks young, even from a distance. 12, maybe? Maybe the kid lives in one of the nearby houses? Probably. Should you call someone? Who? Not the cops. They’d just as soon arrest or hurt the kid as help them. It isn’t that late, leaving the kid be is probably the most prudent course of action.

But. The kid feels…familiar. Even from a hundred meters, you can see that their shoulders are hunched, their hands are tight on the chains of the swing. The gentle creaking as those chains move with the slight shifts of the kid’s body is despondent in a way that is known to you, somehow. So, against your better judgement, you leave the sidewalk and walk across the damp grass to the edge of the playground. When you step onto the sand, the kid’s head jerks up and their shoulders tense further, raising almost to their ears. You stop walking and from the new angle a streetlight throws the kid’s grey hoodie into stark relief.

“Are-are you okay?” you have to clear your throat to get the words out and your voice sounds weak and tinny in the still, silent park.

The shoulders shrug. The kid is also wearing jean cutoffs, their scuffed sneakers unlaced.

“Do you need me to call someone?”

A sharp shake of the head, and then their hands release the chains and fall into their lap.

“Don’t need anything,” the kid’s voice is low, you can barely hear what they’re saying. Gingerly, you take the last few steps to the swing set and awkwardly settle into one of the worn rubber seats. Only after you have already done this do you think to question why you are so compelled to talk to this child who—maybe? how?—has been dogging you all day.

“I said I don’t need anything,” the kid says in an emotionless voice. Their face is still completely shadowed by their hood and shaggy hair.

 “I just—look, kid, I think I’ve been where you are, and—”

The kid cuts across you, “I tried to tell them today. But I…couldn’t, I didn’t know how to, so I just ended up saying I like girly shoes and wanted some or whatever.”

Oh. So you were right. You know exactly what’s going on. In fact, you’re pretty sure you had that precise conversation, once.

“That’s tough,” you acknowledge, slowly pushing back in the swing, which creaks beneath you, “It took me a long time too.”

There’s silence. Then:

“That’s what I was worried about.”

You start and quickly glance over at the kid, who has finally turned to face you.

She doesn’t have a face, which, you suppose, really shouldn’t be a surprise. You weren’t seeing things, earlier. There’s just a smooth expanse of dark olive skin. The featureless head tilts to one side and she speaks again.

“I thought you might recognize me.” The voice is plaintive. With every word, you feel a sense of vertigo, like there is a mouth, somewhere, that is making those sounds, that it’s right in front of you, but you cannot perceive it.

You are breathing very rapidly, “I thought—how do you know me? What’s, I mean—”

“This?” the kid gestures at her face, “I don’t know, I can see but I can’t see myself, I dunno what’s going on. All I know is I was walking to the park and then I was here, or I mean, on the road this morning and saw you and I followed you and I just want to go home or just sleep or just melt away but I can’t, okay? There’s just nothing.”

Without noticing, you have sprung to your feet and are backing away from the faceless girl, the faceless girl who can’t tell her parents who she is. Who you are.

“I didn’t want to think about it,” you whisper. Why are you even responding to this? This is a hallucination, or a dream. You’re just reacting to the whole bullshit situation with your cousin and Jackson and that fucking pharmacy tech. Did you fall asleep back in the lab, is that it? You pinch yourself, but no luck, “I came out and that was what I needed. Okay? Why dwell on, on, on all of that shi—stuff that happened before?”

The girl is still sitting placidly in the swing, though her hands are once again clenched around the chains.

“I knew you were me, I guess. So I followed. I don’t think anyone else notices me either, not that that’s anything new,” The note of bitterness in her voice cuts you to the bone, “I thought maybe you—me, future me, whatever—would be able to…fix me? But nothing’s changed, has it?”

You’re backed up to the slide now, “Why are you doing this? What even are you?”

You slump against the side of slide, your knees suddenly weak, “This cannot—this is bullshit, I don’t know how you’re doing this, but—”

The faceless girl is in front of you now, hands jammed into the front pocket of her hoodie. She stands there, contemplating her future self, “I just want to understand,”

The kid, proto-Becca, or whatever or whoever she is, sure sounds like a kid desperately trying to make sense of something, and not some ghoulish nightmare creature.

“Just stop,” you say in a hoarse voice, “I just don’t want to think about it, I shouldn’t have to think about it, I just want to move forward.”

“Yeah,” proto-Becca abruptly falls to her knees, and draws them up to her chest. It takes a few seconds for you to understand the sounds that the kid is making are sobs.

You hug your own knees and contemplate getting up and running away and just forgetting about all of it: this faceless phantom of your childhood self, your relatives’ inability to accept your reality, the absurd, useless, pointless stats and analyses. You’re crying too, desperately trying to refocus on the here and now, instead of being drawn down into the rabbit hole of loneliness and regret and fear that always consumes you when you think too hard about those years in which it felt like your whole body was turning against you and you couldn’t find any satisfactory explanations for what you were feeling.

But the sounds of proto-Becca, of proto-you, sobbing into her knobbly knees bring you back to the present. Ironic, that. No matter what else, however she got here, whatever happened to her face, she’s a kid. She’s a kid. She’s. A. Kid. You were a kid.

You furiously wipe your eyes and nose and sit up, scooting a bit closer to proto-Becca.

“Hey, I’m sorry,” you say in as steady a voice as you can manage, “I was scared, and, and, and I lashed out. It’s not your fault, kid.”

She doesn’t lift her head, but the sobs are quieter.

“I mean, kid, no offense, but you don’t have a face. And somehow you’re me, right?” Okay, that came out meaner than you meant it to, “The truth is that I’ve done my best to forget pretty much everything that happened back when I was…you, I guess. But I can’t.”

She sniffles, “I’m trying to tell them, I am. But the boys at school, every time I try to talk to Mom or Dad I see those boys laughing and yelling and coming at me and I can’t, I don’t—know how I ended up here, or what to do about this or anything. I just want things to be normal.”

And, finally, you get it. Not why she’s here, or how, or what any of this means, but, at least, what to do. You’ve tried to help kids who were like you before. You’d never have told them that they needed to keep their feelings concealed, that they needed to not do anything so as to avoid reminding you of your own past. So why, then, are you doing it to yourself?

“Is it okay if I come sit next to you, maybe give you a hug?” you ask, as gently as you can.

You get a glimpse of the faceless face from behind the curtain of hair, “I—I think so?”

You get to your feet, a task far more laborious than you feel it should be, and cross to her. When you plop down by her side, she twitches, but it’s toward you. Slowly and carefully, you wrap an arm around her narrow shoulders, and hold her close. She’s still crying, and the hood has slipped from her dark curls.

“It’s okay that it’s taking time,” you say, “It’s really, really hard. I meant that. There’s…nothing out there. No one to explain to you, to, uh, us, what these feelings mean, really. I remember. I remember how much it feels like you’re just stuck in the same looped computer program. Endlessly completing the same actions with no idea why, only feeling like something isn’t right. And so scared of what happens if you do anything that breaks that loop.”

“That’s pretty much it,” she says with a note of wait, that wasn’t completely in my head???, “I don’t see how I can explain to anyone, especially Mom and Dad.”

“I think all you can do is be honest. There are some resources out there, although maybe they aren’t published yet,” you glance sideways at her, “But if you just…elucidate those feelings you’ve been sitting on, it at least opens the door to them comprehending.”

“I guess so,” she sighs, and then giggles, “But also, like, no offense, that was, like, a really freakin’ pretentious way to say that.”

You snort and ruffle her hair, “Whatever. Something for you to look forward to, then.”

She’s quiet for a bit and then, quick like a bird, she wraps her arms around you too, “So I’m gonna tell them, then?”

You shrug, “When you’re ready. Whenever that is. And I promise, you are no lesser if it takes a while. Okay?”

“But you’re still going to hate thinking about me, right? I mean, about how long it took me, you, to finally do it?” her head tilts.

You sigh, “I don’t know. It’s hard, I won’t pretend it isn’t. But I think I can at least say that it’s okay. That it’s not my, or your, fault.”

When you look up, her face appears. Smile first. Broad and full of braces, her quick and nervous brown eyes darting to your face and then back to her knees.

“You’ll be fine,” you say, giving her one last squeeze, “I’m the living proof, right?”

Her laugh lingers in the air as she fades away.

x