#An essays worth of me hyping myself up lmao

[foolishlywandwaving]

Oooo good luck on your exams!!!

What are your favorite study/learning methods? I love a good flashcards situation, plus just writing down everything I know.

THANK YOU - think they went well! I'm excited to catch up on fic updates and reply to stuff generally :)

good q on study methods - I've found a pattern that works for me over the years, and how I study/learn now is v different to how I studied for exams when I was a teenager/undergraduate.

thoughts on cramming can cramming work? yes and no. I crammed throughout my undergrad, all-nighters, covering a module's worth of lectures in 24 hours. did I do well? actually yes. I had decent short-term memory back in the day, so my method then was to take out my old notes/audio transcripts from my dictaphone (long before recorded lectures were A Thing), and write everything down verbatim. everything. in tiny, cramped handwriting. the success of cramming depends on the subject and what is expected of you. anything more engineering/maths-based is difficult. more essay/factual recall-based? I could absolutely get way with cramming HOWEVER cramming is simply awful for your physical and mental well-being. I swore to myself I would never live like that again lmao, off red bull and monster, terrible takeaway meals, two hours of sleep a night, high-level anxiety bowel movements (tmi). just. hell no. I was a wreck after my finals

being an Adult and work-life balance it turns out you DON'T have to live like the above. who knew??? I still have to do professional exams in my thirties, when I have so many other commitments than before. sometimes I wonder where I would be professionally if I hadn't pissed away my twenties ... anyway. I had fun. nowadays I think you're better off turning up to class and working through your problem sheets, practicing past papers, going through extra worksheets, teaching your friends. is that more effort? of course it is, and I obviously didn't do this when I was eighteen. I sort of have a list now of what's important to keep myself sane during mandatory exam prep:

nothing I learn during revision is new. it is revision. throughout the year/term/module, I keep up in class, ask questions throughout if I don't know, form study groups (with a highly selective group of friends, no deadweights), find and collate all the past paper questions, practice my examinations/clinical reasoning, and most importantly, spend the most time possible on the job with people I admire professionally.

batch cook. batch cook. batch cook. no takeaways, no shit meals. have a set time for food breaks in the day

eat healthily throughout. drink lots of herbal tea because I hate water. a big salad a day. lots of study snacks and treats to keep going

exercise!! don't neglect that. have socialisation with friends during a group sport activity. following that ...

don't neglect friendships; they just might have to change during a busy period. I won't drink but I'll go to the pub for a couple hours after studying. I won't miss a big birthday, I just may join for the dinner and not the party after. I will never miss a wedding

set goals and stick to them. I have so many tips and tricks now on how to keep myself motivated and have a high-output I may write down.

if you have a writing (rather than exam) deadline, don't be afraid of writing absolute garbage and then EDIT. don't be scared of the blank page. just shit it out

rely on your partner/friends/family. and do the same back for them when they are busy. get a hype man, be the hype man

and good luck with all your exams! I have faith in you anons. now eat your vegetables

[saintinblack]

ok idc about “cool jobs” anymore I’m going working in a nonstop shop RIGHT NOW idc if I actually get into university I’m just gonna study troughout the night idc idk it’s vi season holidays are over NO TIME TO STAY DEPRESSED Leo season has hit my Leo moon and reminded me what it’s like to depend on your family and I HATE IT so what if it’s 700 a month and I get no sleep I NEED A JOB UNIVERSE IM MANIFESTING AN EASY TO GET JOB IM CAPABLE OF BEING AN OK EMPLOYEE IM CAPABLE OF HAVING MY SHIT TOGERHER AND MOST IMPORTANTLY DRUGS TAUGHT ME HOW TO STAY AWAKE FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME stop being a bitch yon all my favourite artists and writers have done insane seemingly impossible shit to stay alive and change the world AND IF I HAVE TO WORK 2/2 NIGHT SHIFTS TO FEEL OK WHILE STUDYING PHILOSOPHY I MIGHT AS WELL DO IT YON YOURE A T H E L E M I T E AND YOUR CURRENT STATE OF YOUR JOURNEY TO FINDING YOUR WILL HAS TO DO WITH BRING FINANCIALLY INDEPENDEND AND I HAVE TO STOP MAKING EXCUSES TO STAY IN MY COMFORT ZONE THAT ISNT EVEN COMFORTABLE

YOURE GONNA BE 20 IN EXACTLY 6 MONTHS and you’re gonna feel BAD being 30 with no job LIVING WITH YOUR DAD and experience has shown EVEN WORKING A SHIT JOB MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER and the past two weeks have shown NOT WORKINg ALL DAY MAKES YOU DEPRESSED AND PSYCHOTIC AND FUCKS YOUR SLEEP CAUSE YOU DONT GET TIRED ENOUGH and it FUCKS WITH YOUR SELF ESTEEM

a human is useful and valid and good if they’re 20 and have no job And live with their parents especially if they’re as crazy as I am and in an ok world I would be able to just make art and focus on not offing myself but if I wanna make that ok world reality I have to keep my shit together and push trough my inability to function

GOT NOTHING TO LOSE BUT A SHITTY INCARNATION

OBJECTIVELY THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN IS ME COMPLETELY LOSING MY GRIP ON REALITY

WHICH IS CONSTANTLY A THREAT ANYWAY AO GO FUCKING ACT ON YOUR DESIRES AND SHUT THEM UP BEXT TIME THEY CALL YOU LAZY

[goldenscript]

ah u and i both are putting off english hw. i have a rough draft due monday and whole lotta other shit for the class but here i am. doing none :-) GIRL I CAN WRITE A WHOLE DAMN ESSAY ON OIKAWA AND WHY HE DESERVED MORE. god i love that man sm he’s fighting for my ass and soul with kook. I cant remember the last time i DIDNT spoil myself with a movie tbh.. And UGH im just curious as to how everyone’s gonna work together since the avengers are kind of in a sticky sit atm with the members and (1/?)

everything BUT THE WORLD AINT READY FOR WAKANDA DUDE. ngl t’challa didn’t have a strong intro for me during civil war, i remember being like ‘ok u got claws whats good’ but now it’s like OK KITTY SHOW EM WHATS UP!! what story app was it bc it sounds interesting! it’s good that you’re challenging yourself, it’s so important for artists and authors to venture out of their safe zones (something that i know i struggle with a lot still)!! tbh with u i never got into twilight, i watched the movie (2/             

and i was like ok wats the hype dude. but then again ive always been a huge critic when it comes to real life supernatural teen romance stuff but when it’s an anime/fics im like >:O GASP WHAT’S NEXT >:O LMAO. for me ideas come and go and i do my best to thread them together but a lot of times im like.. wtf this doesnt make any sense *SCRAPS*. ok ur pretty spot on with that, jin would most DEF be the cafeteria lady that everyone ogles over despite the nasty ass goop he plops down on their (3/?             

plate, but i mean his smile is what makes everything worth it right?? he would def work at the same school with yoongi to which everyone thinks is unfair esp kook but hey boy shut your roach ass up. then there’s tae and jimin who somehow landed the delivery boy jobs together. it would be more crack+slice of life tbh haha. (4??/) -sjsu     

girl i hella put off my english draft due today too jdshfjsfh luckily my teacher doesn’t grade drafts for content and more or less for completion. since this paper is like 1500-1800 words he was like “it’s ok if you only have a few paragraphs” done so bless that ‘cuz i got my points for it. AND OMG GIRL. I FEEL THAT THO. LIKE I FEEL SO STRONGLY FOR THE CHARACTERS AND I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. i want them all to succeed gdi. & mood, i love kook with my whole heart n soul 2.

honestly i always spoil myself with movies but i told myself not to do it for black panther and that’s probably it ahahahah. but yooooooo, i haven’t seen civil war yet LOL. i haven’t even seen winter soldier so i was like “Well i obvi can’t watch civil war then” jkdsfhs soon tho. just so i can keep up with the storyline. & ok i had to search and redownload it but it’s called heroes rise! it’s like a trilogy app bundle and you gotta pay for it (sorry boo but it’s so fun and i rec it!!!!!!!)

it’s something i just gotta do, man. i wanna try diff genres to find my niche so if it’s hard then that just means i gotta work to get it together. ^_^ and i read the book and i was having a huge moment for vampires and werewolves, that’s the only real reason why i liked twilight so much LOL. i can’t write vampires for shit tho ‘cuz i feel like that’s one genre i can’t really…. satisfy myself with? l.j. smith (author of vampire diaries and night world) made such a profound impression on me with that genre so i can’t hold a candle to her kjsdfhksjfh but i think it just makes more sense to like it as an anime since they’re technically animated and usually the plots are a lot better, more cohesive than most real-life depictions.

ahahahahaha, yes thank u! they’d have pockets of issues like sometimes wishing they had powers again. probably namjoon messing around in the library trying to read up on godly stuff, maybe trying to find a loophole on their sentence. or something pops up like “alright bitches,,,,,,,,,,,,,,” and their past starts coming back to haunt them LOL.

[idrils]

gonna leave this post open for a day or so, spider-man homecoming thoughts under the cut (big spoilers!!)

can’t BELIEVE how cool they managed to make the vulture

like i tend not to read up on these movies before they come out, like ‘here’s who michael keaton is playing’ or ‘here’s the bad guy’ or whatever, bc like...... i’m gonna go see it, i wanna find out Cinematically. but as soon as michael keaton put that fucking fur-lined bomber jacket on i was like Oh Dear, he’s gonna be the senior citizen who robs banks

but he was fucking radbaloney, scary and sort of sympathetic?? a better written villain than the fucking vulture had any right 2 be lmao

very happy with the diversity, not just in the principal cast but also in the crowd scenes. it actually looked like real new york city, as opposed to the homogeneous white supremacist version that filmmakers have been using for far too long

THE

TWIST

HOW DID I NOT SEE THAT COMING, IT WAS SO EFFECTIVE

ned is everything, i’m so proud of my boy

if i think too long about how tony is still working on prototypes for cap’s shield i will collapse in on myself

TONY. OLD DAD MAN. distant dad man. his characterization seemed kind of......... all over the place a bit?? ik that a coming-of-age story trope is like, making the disapproving father figure proud but the way he treated peter was confusing. idk, maybe i am missing something obvious

i really dig how the kids actually dressed like KIDS. like, clothes that didn’t always fit right, peter’s endless supply of nerd shirts (i relate, oh my god, i wore almost exclusively mathlete and ‘if you’re not the solution you’re the precipitate’ and ‘physics: we pull our own mg’ tshirts in high school), mj’s cute-grunge look and Ned’s Hat and all

peter is the least subtle about his Secret Identity, he is taking lessons from barry allen, he’s hanging out JUST OUTSIDE A HOUSE FULL OF HIS CLASSMATES WITH HIS SUIT AND NO MASK. every other sentence he calls himself spider-man. he talks with ned In Public in normal tones of voice about spider-manning. peter. please. keep it in your suit, you’re not even trying

HYPE about may finding out who he is lmao. keeping that shit secret from her is such a staple in the comics, it’s very refreshing that she can be an ally to him

WHEN PETER COMES HOME IN HIS ‘I SURVIVED A TRIP TO NYC’ SHIRT AND HE’S HEARTBROKEN WITH TEARS IN HIS EYES. I HAD NO IDEA A HUMAN COULD LOOK SO SAD. LET ME HUG YOU YOU DARLING BOY, YOU ARE DOING YOUR BEST AND I’M SO PROUD

me every five seconds: what a good boy

PETER IS JUST SO GOOD. HE FEELS SO RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING AND HE HAS THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD ON HIS FIFTEEN Y/O SHOULDERS AND HE’S SUCH A GOOD BOY

i’m tearing up now.just thinking. about what a good boy he is

i can’t believe tony invited him to move upstate and live in like, Avengers Dorm. HE IS A CHILD, TONY. HE HAS AN AUNT AND FRIENDS AND A HOME AND HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL. there’s this new trend (even supported in some newer comics - gillen, i want to say? but idr) that tony is Anti-School, college dropout, all his doctorates are honorary etc but he LOVES LEARNING and even as recently as cap civil war gave a ton of grant money to mit students!!!! i KNOW that HE KNOWS how important school is for PETER THE BABY GENIUS

like is it supposed to be viewed as Character Development or Realizing Pete’s Worth that he goes from ‘i have some pull at mit, why don’t you focus on school’ to ‘quit school and avenge full time’??????? what a bad

CAP’S EDUCATIONAL SHORTS. i can’t - i just - this jackass - 

literally thirty seconds before the final stinger i said ‘ ok marvel you know we’re all sticking around, wrap it up’ and then - THE AUDACITY, THE NERVE

he was wearing THE WORST cap costume of all, the one from 2012 avengers until some undetermined time before winter soldier, so am i to understand that within 2 weeks of defrosting the old man the new york public school system (or the NATIONAL public school system????) was like ‘read this, talk to kids about puberty and detention and physical fitness and please look like a complete and utter schmuck while you do it’ ??? give the guy a break i beg you

steve rogers is the guy y ou LEAST want your students to be like, if you are a School Authority. you know that fucker was getting in fights in the hallway and turning in impassioned essays about the poor treatment of non-white non-dudes in america and his long-suffering teacher was like ‘steven this is a math class’ and smoking asthma cigarettes

we now know that ned and peter are star wars nerds, so #confirmed that pete was fucking with old man tony in civil war when he called empire ‘that old movie’??

‘come on peter - come on spider-man - come on spider-man-’ CUE ME CRYING FOR SEVERAL HUNDRED YEARS

honestly i want to see tony’s POV of this - not bc he is my fav (he is) but bc i want to see him try to justify all of his bad choices in this movie. I’M STILL STUCK ON THIS. there is no reason not to listen to peter, or to foist him off on happy, when happy relates all the peter stuff to tony anyway!!!! like, ok, tony had the worst dad so he knows how Not To Dad, and i KNOW i am being redundant bc i have ALREADY SAID it is a staple of the coming-of-age genre (and lbr, most Young Superhero stories) that the adults Didn’t Listen when The Kids Were Right, but even if tony is Emotionally Distant, he’s not dumb, and leaving peter out of the loop (’who do you think called the fbi’ - WHY WOULD YOU NOT TELL PETER THAT WAS THE PLAN, HE IS A NATURALLY INQUISITIVE YOUNG MAN WHO FEELS RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE, YOU SHOULD RELATE, YOU SHOULD KNOW HE IS GOING TO CONTINUE INVESTIGATING) was very very dumb and i am heated about it

mj was CRIMINALLY underused but it looked like they set her up for a bigger role in the next one so /shrug emoji

there was so much absolutely classic parker bailing on shit to save the world, it’s not a spider-man story if his entire social circle isn’t worried he’s doing shady shit and/or always low-key pissed at him for flaking

dong lover cameo was very funny (now we’ve had 2 members of derrick comedy doing mcu cameos, let’s throw some dominic dierkes in the mix) and given that he was credited as aaron davis and mentioned his nephew, COULD IT BE that miles will someday be a part of the mcu, show me That Dude

[recordedscratch-blog]

4,6,14

oh dope a response to the question thing n shit thats cool

it waaaaas for my fav band my future piercing n the last time i cried

soooo uh i think the last time i garbled upon the subject i was fuckin spurtin like crazy bout milo who is still fuckin like

legit to the heart n core of my soul not even kiddin hes like my musical spirit animal

buuut since goin juts about him twice is redundant ill just go fuckin crazy over soomeone else for a tick

iiiid say probably aesop rock

i fuckin went bananas over him before when i found out that he skated despite him saying that he could in “lotta years” but like knowing that he can still pull off impossibles is slick so i got hype off that anyways

but hes legit for real his instrumentals are absolutely fuckin excellent on their own but his bars are worth their gold on their own since usually they are just drippin with some kind of meanin

he just has a great way of wording shit man the way that he can be so fantastical with his lyrics is absolutely inspiring

there was even a study that compared rappers and their word diversity and aesop was so above fucking EVERYONE that his result wasnt even properly represented in the graph because youd have to expand the whole thing at the cost of space to the other rappers so hes just stuck at the end like outlier georg

i mean hes outpreforming a high number of major players like drake n mf doom n the ENTIRE WUTANG CLAN PUT TOGETHER its fucking outrageous

you can find the chart here https://pudding.cool/2017/02/vocabulary/ hes just so fucking dope

in terms of piercings id like to say either on my fuckin butt or something or like lobe and industrial bars cuz those are cool n shit

i wanted to get like a tongue stud for a while but then i heard its super easy to idly chew on those things and fuck up your teeth something real good which sounds exactly like something id so nah lmao

i can see myself swallowing em by accident too and id probably like cut up my insides and then die like a big old idiot

the doctor will look over my corpse and point and laugh and be like hahaha what the fuck this isnt even a thing that fucking happens what a loser

anyways the crying one uhhhh

[ PRIVATE ]

k so like i normally fuckin hate sharin this shit cuz its a bit too much

since shit doesnt matter to other people and all bein fuckin open bout it does is like

make rando people worried about me n shit?? n i dont wanna do that cuz it feels like im just jumping people with my bullshit n forcing them to feel bad

n then it becomes a fucking assblast festival in my honor and name and people will put down hard pity about it and bother me bout it like they know my shit

some rando fuckin internet strangers actin as my moral compass as if i asked

as if im this idiot puppy dog who needs to be pitied and babied and guided cuz boohoo he feels bad

even talkin bout it openly is essentially a call for attention and i aint no pussy

but my therapist be tellin me i need tbe more open more so ill spill this shit i guess

by the way if you copy paste this shit or put it somewhere or fucking do anything with what im spittin i will fuckin hunt you down and expose you like the piece of shit pussy coward you are

i dont even give a fuck if you pass me on this i will fight to put down your ass n get your ass tossed off your job or some shit

but uh

yeah anyways

last time i cried was like a few weeks ago cuz like i was at work n it was a tuesday and since jack shit happens on tuesdays right

cept the only thing was some new album was coming out that day but thats chill

but some fucker came in with this huge trade in and is making me go through his dead granddads music movie collection of 100+ which is horrible but fuckin FINE whatever

i end up having to juggle this transaction with people trying to buy said album and calling to ask if i have said album which stressed me out like fuck cuz this trade in guy was a bit of a fucking grunch when i had to do other things that werent his thing because “he was there first” but other people would get grunchy when theyd get ignored or put aside for trade in guy because it “they deserve just as much attention as the next customer”

or theyd be forced to wait a good bit because im busy with something else

not like everyone was like that but one person is enough to ruin the mood right

anyways that wasnt the thing that really set me off to cry

well not directly anyways

in foresight i could have just said bad work day and not give an essay bout my horsecrap but i already typed it all out so fuck it you asked

it was just a bad day and there was a lot of moments that made me feel stupid and i just really hate feeling stupid

so anyway i finished my shift n finished up and just rushed off to the employees bathroom since it was the closest secluded place n i just needed a fuckin moment to just

destress i guess

enclosed spaces make me comfortable i guess idk

so im just on the toliet lid down holding my head in my hands holding the weight with my elbows on my knees and im just

getting more and more upset

like ill think about a mistake ive made that day then ill think about a worse mistake ive made in the past and get upset more

then ill get upset at myself at me holding those past grudges and get upset how i cant just let go of shit all together

and then ill get upset about getting upset about this SAME issue AGAIN and it just keeps looping through it over and over again like feedback between a microphone and a speaker

which is so infuriating because i KNOW that its happening all over again but i cant stop being a just

huge pussy and crying about it

so uh yeah i cried all like that and it was pretty awful

[ PRIVATE END ]

fuckin stubbed my toe haha it sucked