#AmicitiaWeek | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

amicitiaas · 7 years ago

Text

[FIC] Dad-Bod

Synopsis: Clarus’ Saturday milk runs and trips to the butcher force Gladio and Iris to take action into their own hands when they don’t agree with his fashion choices.

Characters: Gladiolus Amicitia, Iris Amicitia, Clarus Amicitia.

Pairing: Gen/ implied Clarus/Regis and Gladio/Ignis

Wordcount: 6355

Rating: T (There is one f-bomb)

Read it at AO3

Amicitia Week Day 1 Prompt: “You are not leaving the house like that!” @amicitias-week

>>OMG DID YOU SEE DAD *eyes emoji* *eyes emoji*

Iris’ text alert chimed off his phone but it was already heralded by a yell coming from upstairs. Usually the norm in this house. He was in the middle of a King’s Knight game and her text notification banner interrupted his match.

Barely moving from his comfortable spot on the couch in the living room, he shot back his reply.

>>No why?

>>Do I want to?

Last time she sent a text like this a couple months ago, she sent him old photoshoots from decades ago she found with their dad in embarrassing fashion attire. Like pretty bad. Bell-bottoms, corduroy—just not a good look for him.

>>Check Crystal Clear’s Royal Outing Alert column.

Gladio clicked the link she sent him only for her to just reply with a screenshot.

>>It’s soooo bad.

It was. Clicking on the text banner, he opened a photo of their dad on the street not far from their house. From the angle, he could tell it was probably a paparazzi shot and boy did they get a good one. Their dad had grocery and paper bags in his hand, a pair of shades on, and a Crownguard cap, but also the shortest Crownsguard running shorts he’d ever seen on anybody and a Kenny Crow shirt he’d received as a gift from Talcott that was two sizes too small and said “Kenny-licious.”

And the shoes. Gladio shook his head. Mogs. The foam clog moogle-themed shoes that old people and toddlers wear. Why. Why did Iris ever think that was a good idea to get him for his birthday?

It was bad. It was so bad. He had to put an end to it.

But first he had to see what the full damage was. Bracing for the hit, he returned to his browser and let the article load.

Dad-Bod Alert!

In a rare outing, Clarus Amicitia, Shield of the King, is seen leaving Duscae Butchers last Saturday with some prime cuts. For those unfamiliar with the Amicitia family, arguably the second most famous family in the Kingdom, Clarus is known for his privacy and shying out of the limelight. His kids, Gladiolus, 22, and Iris, 14, are much more conscious of their celebrity, however.

Gladio was tempted to click the links that they provided for both of them but kept reading,

But Papa Amicitia was seen sans-heirs as he apparently went out for some much needed meat, and at 54, he’s still got it. Training and keeping up as the King’s Shield requires lots of protein and he’s well equipped. (The grocery bags too!) A an anonymous source reveals the Amicitia weekly butcher haul is nearly twelve pounds of gourmet and regular cuts of meat. Must need a lot to feed two Shields and a growing teen! We wonder what the daily training routine for the Amicitias is, but even if most of us at Clarus’ age have a dad-bod, it’s clear that this is not the case with him.

Rocking a pair of Mogs, the Captain of the Crownsguard is keeping up with legs day from what we can see as he is repping a pair of standard issue Crownsguard shorts, giving us a hint of that juicy booty, and arms day is still m very much in the routine as those Arm-icitias are nearly bursting out of a faded Kenny Crow shirt. Any eagle-eyed readers can catch a glimpse of the Crest of the Shield, an ambiguous bird tattoo that each Shield places on their body when they take their oaths. Clarus’ is a bit modest compared to son Gladio’s, but he’s still one tough cookie regardless. Even though he’s got his heirs lined up and devoted much of his time to the King and the duties of the throne, Clarus remains unmarried, but anybody who wants a bite of this beefcake will have to stand in line after the King.

We give this Royal Outing Alert a 7/10.

“Are you reading it?” Iris squealed, running down the hall and appeared over the balcony. “Juicy Booty. They wrote that. And beefcake. Oh my gods I’m going to throw up.”

He frowned up at her. “Oh I know. It’s so bad.” That’s not even counting the insinuation between his Dad and the King, which, even though it was true, was known by only a handful of people and adamantly denied by the Citadel. Didn’t stop the public from talking about it though.

Simultaneously walking down the stairs and texting furiously, Iris said, “Who’s writing this? Who seriously thinks dad is attractive in that.”

Gladio sat up. “Well, at least you give him some credit.”

She glanced up from her phone halfway down the stairs. “I mean, yeah, you agree dad’s not bad looking but not like that. Never like that. Who let him out? What were we doing that day?”

“We were both home. He must have snuck out when we were busy or something.”

For as popular as they were they never really had any problems with the press and it helped that they’ve all been prepped with how to handle that aspect of their lives. But how the hell, with all their failsafes, contingency plans, protocol, Monica, Dustin, Jared, did this slip by? Just. Nope. Just their dad, second most powerful man in the kingdom just flaunting it for everybody to see all his untanned bulk and glory and he didn’t know or didn’t care. Or both.

His phone chirped; a text from Noct.

>>OMG, Is that your dad??!?!?!?

>>Are those MOGS?!?!?!

>.WHat arE THOOOOOSE

He could almost hear the ugly snort that he probably made. “Ugh, that little shit,” he muttered.

“You too? I’m texting like eight people right now. It’s a nightmare.”

Gladio shot a text to Ignis to try and get some help.

>>Hey Iggy I need damage control.

His reply was dripping with sass.

>>Unfortunately I don’t do fashion. Not when my supervisor is involved. Perhaps His Majesty can be of assistance?

Punching in his reply, he nearly broke his phone.

>>Iggy you little shit help me.

>>Now, now, none of that. *Kissy face emoji*

Sighing, he tilted his head back on the couch. “Ignis is no help.”

“I don’t blame him. Maybe he’s having second thoughts about dating you.” Iris sat on the armrest, laughing at her dig as she still texted away. “We’ve got to do something.”

Gladio rubbed at his temple. “‘Hey Dad, your fashion’s bad and you’re embarrassing us.’”

She hummed negatively. “Nope that only affects us. Gotta say it in a way he’ll understand. More like: You’re tarnishing the family name and embarrassing the King.”

“Oof, brutal. Hit him where it hurts.”

“Desperate times call for desperate measures, Gladdy.” She looked up from her phone. “And it’s an Amicitia solution. Effective, efficient.”

“So you’re gonna tell him, then?”

“I thought you were going to.” She gave him the face she always gave when she was trying to charm her way out. It almost worked.

“Nope. I don’t want to get extra training for a month with him and Cor.”

“You’re an adult!”

“You’re his favorite,” he shot back.

“Uh, yeah? And I want to keep it that way.”

“Should we get Jared involved? As back up of course.”

“—Backup for what?” Both of them whipped around as their dad slid open the kitchen door and joined them in the living room.

Iris rounded her eyes at Gladio but transitioned smoothly into the “charm anyone” face she just gave. Smiling, she said, “Oh we were just planning a little surprise for Talcott. A little Kindergarten graduation.”

Their dad bought it and Gladio stored away the information of how quickly she could lie out of her ass.

“Oh, he’ll enjoy that! He loves you two. Do you need anything from the store then? I have to run and grab some milk.” He gave a pointed stare at Gladio. “Somehow even the spare gallon of whole milk is gone and I—”

“—‘And you hate that almond shit.’ We know,” Iris said.

Clarus made a face but it was quickly transitioning into a smile. “Yeah. It’s just water,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t know why you like it, honey, but at least one of my kids gets it.”

Gladio saw Iris give their dad a once over and good reason too. He was wearing his crownsguard running shorts again and an old Coernix shirt.

“Oh, are you just running up to change?”

Clarus shook his head “Nah, I forgot my keys. I left them in my jeans upstairs,” he said, beginning to run up the stairs two at a time.

Iris raised her eyebrows at Gladio and mouthed Tell. Him.

“I’ll get it, dad,” he blurted. He couldn’t think of how to tell him without a strategy.

He paused almost at the top but smiled. “It’s alright, son. Normally I would but I want to stop by the butcher and see if they have what I’m looking for.”

“And we know how picky you are,” Iris droned on, exasperated at his determination to go out on his own.

Clarus shook his head. “I like that of all the lessons and history I’ve taught you, my habits are what you throw back at me.”

“Because we love you, daddy,” Iris said, almost pained. “No matter what you like. Or don’t like. Or dress,” she said under her breath.

“Hrmm?”

Gladio grinned.

“Huh? Oh I said ‘Oh yes.’ My friend Varinia just texted me and said she’s going to be in one of my classes. You remember Varinia?”

“Yep. Short hair, mother works for the bank and father is an artist?”

“That’s the one, pops!”

“She still interested in joining the Crownsguard? I know she missed first assessment, but I’ve seen her on the field during one of your matches.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, if she is, and if you like her enough, let me know and we can schedule something.”

Iris shrugged. “I mean she’s a friend, but not like a best friend, y’know?”

Clarus snorted. “Pretty harsh. And they say I’m the one with high standards. But anyway I gotta get going.” He jogged the rest of the way up.

After they made sure he was far enough down the hall, Gladio looked expectantly at her.

“Okay, I couldn’t either.”

“Well then I guess we’re the kids with that dad.”

“You mean the dad who everyone is afraid of? Yeah. And we’re those kids who don’t want to hurt their dad’s feelings.”

“Or get conditioning with Cor.”

“Yeah that, too.”

“Okay, I’m heading out!” Clarus called from the other stairs at the end of the hall.

“Okay!” Iris called out.

“Love you!” Gladio added.

Her phone chimed a few more times and she sunk down on the couch next to him. “Ugh, this is a nightmare. I have to live knowing my dad has a juicy booty. And there are a bunch of people so thirsty for him.”

...

The next Saturday, they both checked the gossip sites and found yet another article and picture about their dad and his milk run. This time, the adjectives were “DILF” and “sugar daddy” and went into great detail about how strong he was and how much milk he must be drinking to be in such great shape.

Normally, these kinds of articles and gossip were left ignored. Honestly, it was an ego boost and kept the media off their backs, and the media also knew to stay several feet away from them. The only instance they had personally interfered was an internet post about Iris and a dress she wore at an event last year and they shut that down real quick. No one wants a lawsuit and maybe a personal visit from the Amicitia family. As a comment in a forum went, “People like their teeth in their mouth,” and he agreed, because he had spent some time imagining some training dummies were the internet trolls and no one felt that the decommissioning of them due to “excessive wear and tear” was out of place.

The public was eating up these articles because their dad was so reclusive when it came to the press, literally anything about him goes viral. But it also meant they had to suffer through his popularity and fashion choices.

More alarming was the fact that a photographer seemed to be following their dad around, enough that he figured where to find him consistently on Saturdays; a potential security issue. They all had tails; standard procedure for high profile officials and their families, supervised by Monica and Dustin, but far back enough to forget about. Mostly they were for Iris now, keeping an eye on her daily routes or trips to the mall if he or their dad couldn’t be with her, but the extra guard was nice, able to give them some semblance of normalcy.

He spoke to their assigned Crownsguard—this month it was Lyra, but she hadn’t been able to hone in on the guy. Maybe today they could catch him and have a quick chat. Just like they were trying to do with their Dad. They’d figured out he was heading out right after his personal training sessions, when he indulged in a high calorie shake, hence the attire.

“Okay, I’ve got his keys,” Iris said, “but you better back me up.”

“I got ‘cha, but you gotta butter him up.”

She cringed. “Please, no more food wordplay when it comes to him.”

“My bad. Yeah, I haven’t had an appetite for anything juicy lately.”

“Please stop.”

“Kids, have you seen my keys?” Clarus called down from upstairs.

“Kitchen!”

She raised her eyebrows, signaling Gladio to stand by the sliding door.

They heard their dad come down the stairs, a spring in his step. Gladio noticed he was oddly gung-ho about heading out lately, enough for him to wonder if he was doing it on purpose. He didn’t blame the guy for trying to be a normal dad and citizen for once, especially with his workload.

Today’s outfit consisted of the same very high running shorts—Gladio tried his very best not to be reminded of any booty juiciness—his crownsguard cap, his thick dad glasses, and a Meldacio shirt that was old, like maybe he got it when he was his age outside of the city.

“Hey, Daddy,” Iris said sweetly, “Goin’ somewhere?” She had positioned herself strategically in front of the kitchen door, keys in her hand.

Clarus adjusted his cap, scratching his hair that was getting too long for his liking. “Just the grocery store. We’re out of milk again.”

She shot a withering glance at Gladio because it was his fault the milk was gone and therefore his fault dad was going out looking so…dad-like.

“Aren’t you going to change?”

He placed his cap back on. “Nah, I’m fine like this.”

“Uh,” Iris glanced at Gladio for a second, unsure, then she set her jaw and he felt a swell of pride at her determination, despite the potential consequences. “We don’t think so. Maybe put on some jeans.”

Clarus looked down at his attire. “What’s wrong with this? It’s perfectly fine.”

“For you. But the gossip websites have picked up on it.”

Their dad raised his eyebrows, daring her. “And?”

She crossed her arms, standing her ground and she reminded Gladio so much of their grandmother. It was uncanny. But she also looked exactly like their dad in the moment. “And it’s causing us some concern.”

Clarus glanced at Gladio. “Is it?”

Gladio shrugged. “I mean, yeah, you should look at it.”

He shrugged too, the corners of his mouth pulling down. “You know I don’t give a damn about tabloids. You know the protocol. Both of you. Let Monica handle it. Otherwise it’s not important. Keys,” he said.

“Just please, dad. For your children’s sake. For the sake of the kingdom, don’t go out wearing that.”

“Iris,” he said seriously, “give me my keys.”

Exasperated, she threw up her hands at Gladio.

“It looks like the same person’s been taking a picture of you,” he brought up, trying a different tactic. “The pictures from the last three weeks have been from the same angle and location.”

This time Clarus turned his full attention to him. “This has been going on for three weeks and you haven’t mentioned it?“

Oh shit. Abort. Abort. Of course his dad would focus on the security angle. It was The Tone, and he actively worked to placate him. “I’ve spoken to Lyra and Monica, they know. But like, we—Iris and I,” he clarified, “Just thought if you didn’t give the guy what he wants with your attire he’d stop.”

He and Iris watched him exhale, his jaw ticking, a sure sign of him keeping his anger in control. “I’ll deal with this later. Keys.”

Iris handed it to him and he headed out the door. The door to the garage didn’t slam so they took that as a good sign.

“Well, that went…well,” she said simply.

Gladio gritted his teeth. “Well, at least we told him.”

“I don’t think that’s what he got out of this intervention.” She leaned on the counter. “Also that was so scary.”

Copying her posture, he laughed. “That was being a teenager. You’re lucky dad’s still struggling with you growing up. If I pulled that shit he’d give me extra conditioning for a month.”

“How do you know he won’t give me that? Or make Lyra babysit me? I already convinced him I don’t need you around all the time.”

“Ouch. Don’t gotta be so harsh about it, sis.” She was growing up before his eyes. And it was never a burden watching her. As a toddler maybe but that was a different story.

“Whatever. It’s only because you’ve sworn your life to Noctis that he let off you being my personal bodyguard.”

“C’mon, admit you like having me around.”

She rolled her eyes. “As my brother, yes. As my babysitter, no.”

“And now we both have to babysit dad.”

“Ugh, I know. ‘You are not leaving the house like that!’ Honestly, I feel bad because dad doesn’t do that to me and he’s such a great dad, but I have to do it to him? I’m so lucky. Some of my friends have super ridiculous parents and can’t do anything, especially after that dress incident.”

That sparked an idea in his mind. “You might be on to something.”

“Policing Dad?”

“No, I mean we tried one avenue. Time to try another. Let’s see if we can find this guy who’s making our lives a living hell.”

“And make his one,” she said a bit too enthusiastically. She punctuated it with a fist pounding into her hand.

“I mean, I not gonna condone unnecessary violence, but I’m not gonna stop you from making well-meaning threats.” Iris packed a mean punch but she had an even harsher way with words. Probably the result of two Shields raising her, but Dad didn’t mind, and neither did he. He’d seen her put grown men in their place. Once, they were taking the subway and she reprimanded a jerk who was harassing a woman. Didn’t even flinch when the man threw insults back at her.

“What’d you have in mind?”

“Let’s go for a little ride.”

...

Technically, Amicitias didn’t make threats unless they could back it up, and they have the advantage that everyone knows they can. Lots of Houses liked to flex their political muscle, which Amicitias made a point not to do, but he was confidant their dad wouldn’t mind if they flexed the real muscle they trained hard for every day.

In the car—an unmarked Crown Car used to stay under the radar—Gladio tossed his phone to Iris. “Look at the pictures and see if you can spot anything familiar.“

There was one line of sight area of the garage exit from their house to this street, the corner of Veritas and Fortuna, and it probably meant this photographer was hanging around this area waiting for their dad to pass by.

He drove slow, plotting out a course. “So if I was dad, I’d want the most efficient and safe way to get to a place. So Fortuna to Pious and then straight down Corona.”

“Oh, but don’t forget he hates that one crosswalk on Pious Street. With the median—”

He nodded. “—And all the jaywalkers. I know. I went with him to the butcher’s once and they closed off Corona for construction and we had to take it and he was so pissed. I had to hear it the whole car ride. ‘Like lol you’re on the Council, buddy. You can change that.’”

Iris laughed. “Yeah and then he’d shrug and say ‘people are people’ and that his job is to protect the King not jaywalkers who choose to not follow conveniently placed crosswalks.’ Take Sixtus Street. Dad makes me practice driving down there when we go to the coffee shop.”

Turning onto Sixtus, he said, ”You are brutal, you know that? I need to be careful what I say around you or it might come back to bite me in the ass. Also you’re lucky. Dad made me start practice driving since I was thirteen just in case of any emergencies or I had to pick you up from school for said emergencies. Which makes sense I suppose.”

“Fourteen’s no better. He wants me to drive so slow. And at least you didn’t have Cor the Impatient telling you to run yellows.”

“Oh yeah, did dad ever tell you the story about when Noct was born and Cor wrecked the Regalia with the King inside? He was so pissed.”

“Oh man, can you imagine? He must have been. Like. He has one job and Cor nearly ruined it.”

“I don’t have to imagine with Prompto and Noctis and that Audi he got for his birthday. Even Ignis banned them from taking it out.”

Gladio did his best to push the idea of losing Kings and Princes in car accidents. “So where are we? I don’t take this route.”

“Left right here,” she pointed out. “On Quintus. That’ll take you straight to Corona and the butcher is right on the corner of it.” Pinching the pictures on his phone, she zoomed out, adding, “And actually, I think this is where our guy might be. Like here’s those tall apartments and that billboard.”

“I mean, I’m driving, but I trust you.”

She glared sidelong at him. “You mean when you drive me on the main road you’re okay reading texts but suddenly on stakeout you’re Mr. Safety?”

“You mean that one time when we had a medium level threat and I had to get confirmation from Ignis on Noctis’ safety?”

“—Shhhh!” she said suddenly, taking off her seatbelt to lean forward and pointed. “There’s dad!”

Sure enough, he was parallel parking right in front of the butcher shop.

Surveying the cars ahead of them and any potential alleys, Gladio looked for anybody tailing him. “So our guy is one of these cars. Look for anybody with a camera or phone.”

“So…everybody, then?”

“You know what I mean.”

They had the advantage of darker tint for confidentiality but he drove at an acceptable speed to not draw attention. It would be just their luck if someone honked impatiently at them and spooked the photographer.

“Anything?” He looked at oncoming parking spots as well.

“Nope. Need me to be bait?”

“Dad would kill me.”

“No he wouldn’t. It’s a good strategy. Did I tell you about that time he took me on stakeout once?”

“Bullshit.” He pulled in to a spot four units down from where his dad parked.

“He did. I mean, granted, there were like five undercover Crownsguard and even a couple of Glaives on standby but I was never really in any danger. All I had to do was ask a lady which way was the bus.”

“Oh yeah, I remember that op, but he never mentioned you were bait.”

She raised her chin. “Hrmm. Probably didn’t want you to get jealous. You draw so much attention now with your tattoo. And general you-ness.”

This time Gladio rolled his eyes, his attention landing on a dude with a messenger bag getting out of his car. “Wait a minute.”

Iris followed his attention to the thirty-somethingish man in jeans, a hat pulled low, and a large leather messenger bag slung across his body. He was parked across the street from them.

“Ew, he looks like someone who takes shady photos for a living.”

“Bingo.” As their dad exited his vehicle and walked around the street corner to the entrance of the shops, the man they were watching took out a DSLR TEKTON camera from his bag.

“So what’s the game plan? ‘Hey you creep! Stop following our dad or we’ll kick your ass!’”

He snorted. “Yeah something like that. If you don’t mind being bait.”

She shifted in her chair, eyes wide and gave a fist pump. “Aw yeah! OPERATION: Flower Children Rescue Bird Dad is Green!”

“So I’m not gonna ask how long you’ve been waiting to use that.”

“Oh since I was five,” she grinned.

“Well, it’s perfect. So dad will get milk then head to the Butcher’s. That’s his thing. You’ll stand like on the corner, out of dad’s line of sight, but pretty close to that dude’s car and get his attention somehow but don’t look like you’re trying to get his attention.”

“Okay, I’ll pretend I’m on a phone call with you and name drop you. Should do the trick.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Actually, yeah that’s perfect, sis.”

Her grin grew. “And you? Do what you always do? Show some muscle, scare them shitless?”

“Yup. That’s Our Brand.”

“Alright, Flower Bro, let’s go!”

They both exited the vehicle, Gladio keeping his eye on the photographer. He didn’t like the feeling of using Iris as bait but that was his big brother alert going off.

“Hey,” he said, stopping her before she crossed the street, “I know you can handle yourself, but just in case I can’t get to you in time and he tries something, remember, punch him in the throat and kick him in the balls. Real fights are messy.”

To her credit, she didn’t look offended, probably because she’s been convincing both him and their dad to let her be more active in things. Surprisingly, their dad’s actually been the more reasonable one, but he was still the Big Brother.

“Gladdy, I got this!” she said confidently. “I’m not some pretty Noble girl who can’t do anything. I’ve been training just as much as you.”

He smiled. “I know. Just don’t like to see my little sis in danger that’s all. Now let’s kick ass, Flower Sis.” He set up a high five and the strength in her return clap give him the reassurance he needed.

Gladio watched as she crossed the street, her phone in hand, but it was her assessment of the buildings and the street that impressed him. She took up the best vantage point, out of sight of the butcher counter and one parking spot down from the photog’s car. Taking out her phone, she started mid-conversation and he could hear her from here.

“Gladdy, you where are you?!? You were supposed to pick me up twenty minutes ago!”

He shifted his eyes back to the photographer. Nothing yet. Still focused on Dad.

“I don’t care that you had to take the Prince for training. Tell Noctis not to be late!”

Oh wow, even a dig at Noct. She was playing the hell out of this, all the right keywords. And also he was so glad he wasn’t actually on the other end of this fake phone call. The mention of Noctis turned a few heads, even the photographer.

She rolled her eyes, but he could see she knew she had the dude’s attention now. She started walking slowly in front of the car then stopped to hit the message home.

“Gladiolus. Hadrian. Amicitia! Pick me up or I will tell dad you left me here.”

Holy shit, that wasn’t even his real middle name but it struck terror in his heart at her tone. The photographer looked like he’d just struck gold. And technically he did. Iris was off limits, for the most part, when it came to the press. No unapproved pictures of her at, going, or leaving school. Nothing where she was without Gladio or Clarus because she was underage. And those were also pretty rare because they put hard stops on that.

Their guy looked around, checked to see if their dad was still in the shops, and Gladio even put his head down to maintain his cover. The dude crossed the street and acted like he was walking back to his car. But even from here, Gladio saw him point his camera at her and heard a shutter close. Big Mistake.

Iris was pretending to text furiously on her phone right in front of the dude’s driver side door. She did a quick glance again to see that both he and the man were heading towards her. Gladio was a few steps behind him as he crossed the street.

“Excuse me,” the man said, and Gladio thought he was going to talk to her but he instead went to open his car door.

“Oh sorry, sir,” she said, still in her role, but when he opened his door, she reached out and slammed it shut. The photographer looked up at her alarmed.

“Hi,” she said sweetly, her smile dangerous and chilling. Oh man, he better make sure she doesn’t just sock this guy in the face.

“Hello?” he said, cautious. “Iris, right?”

Her smile disappeared. “Right you are.”

He took a step back and bumped into Gladio just as he closed the distance.

“Hey, buddy, good day for pictures, huh?” Gladio said, leaning on his car. “Mind if I take a look?” He held his hand out and the man turned pale when he looked up at him, wordlessly handing it over. “Pretty nice. An Rx-2900, right? AF-R 14-24mm lens?”

The man nodded.

He whistled. “That’s a $2000 lens. Got my friend one of these for his birthday. He’s a photographer with a very good eye.”

He couldn’t believe he using Prompto in a threatening manner, but here he was, and all that jargon he shared with him finally was paying off. Prompto would flip out and think it was so cool when he told him this story.

“I-If you break that, I’m sending you a check,” he said, finding his voice. Gladio tried not to laugh at how pathetic he sounded.

Smiling like Iris was, he said, “Break it? I just wanted to see it.”

The photographer slowly started putting his hand in his pocket and Iris noticed it.

“Ooh, whatcha got there? Maybe you should turn your phone off and put it on top of your car, that way nothing bad happens to it, too.”

Glaring, the man took his phone out of his pocket and shut it off in front of them and placed it on the hood.

“So my friend,” Gladio continued, turning on the camera, thanking silently Prompto had showed him how to operate it, “He likes to take pictures of anything, but he does this thing where he doesn’t follow people around,” he paused, scrolling back through the pictures. “And take pictures of people’s dads.” He flipped it around to show him and Iris. “I mean, it’s a pretty easy thing to do right?”

He started deleting the pictures of his dad one by one.

“And he’s got great subject matter, too. Our other friend, his dad’s the King! Can you believe it? And I’m sure—and I know, because I’m in some of them—he’s got compromising pictures of the prince, too. Parties, pranks, sharpie mustaches, that kinda thing, because they’re teens, but he knows not to sell them.”

Of course, in his freshman year, Ignis had Prompto sign a non-disclosure agreement that was more specific than Noctis’ other classmates, but that was besides the point.

He stopped on a picture of Iris, and it took some self-discipline not to ground pound the camera. He had to remember that they had wanted to do this in broad daylight so that people saw them, saw the tattoos that showed who they were.

“Anyway, I’m getting off track. You look like a smart guy—smart enough to camp right on the corner of Veritas and Fortuna, which also happens to put you conveniently on the edge of two hundred yards, the perfect distance to stay on the legal side of the Princeps Law. But, maybe not too smart because you’re in violation of the main part of the law which states something about stalking and harassment. It’s like the second sentence.”

“You can’t prove anything.”

Gladio pouted in a mockery of thinking. “Sure about that? We have receipts. You took them and sold them. But are you confidant enough that if I run your plates it won’t match a car that’s been in our neighborhood several times this month?”

It was a bluff, although they did have cameras, but the man looked even paler.

“There’s one more thing,” he said, turning to Iris, “This picture of you, Iris, reminded me of it. Isn’t there an addendum?”

Iris smirked. “Oh the Flower Clause? It’s pretty new. Added last year. Named after me because some creep took a picture of me, sold it, and posted it on the internet. But you weren’t gonna do that, right?”

Gladio deleted the three pictures of her. “Don’t worry, we gotcha covered, my dude.”

He handed the man back his camera. “You know, we don’t mind pictures being taken of us. We know we’re a popular family. Nothing wrong with that, but you need to stop with this harassment of our dad.” He leaned closer so people passing by wouldn’t hear his next words. “And I swear to Bahamut and every Astral I will dance on your face if you take another picture of our dad or any of us. If I even see you near my father again, our house, or Astrals help you—my little sister, I will end you, got it? Do not. Fuck. With. Us.”

Iris leaned forward. “Was that a yes I heard?”

Gladio tried his best not to laugh again because Damn, Girl, take it down two notches.

“Yeah, I got it,” he answered.

“See, that was easy.”

They let him get in his car and watched as he drove away.

“We did it!” Iris exclaimed, giving him a tight hug. “Geez, and that felt so good too!”

He smiled. “Yeah it does, but don’t let it get to your head. This was an extraneous circumstance.”

“I know, but oh my gods did you see his face? He almost shit his pants.”

This time he finally did laugh, because yeah, they did scare that guy shitless. Even if he did try and press harassment charges, it was literally a he-said-they-said and technically they didn’t break any laws. And they literally had the law on their side.

“So since we’re out, how about a celebratory milkshake? Insomniac is just around the corner,” Iris pointed out.

“You betcha, sis. OPERATION: Flower Children Save Bird Dad was a success.”

They made it back home at the same time, Clarus pulling in the garage next to them. “Where were you two off to?”

“Oh we went to get some milkshakes,” Gladio said, handing the milkshakes to Iris. “We brought you one. I mean, I know you went to get some milk but we felt bad about earlier.”

“Yeah, daddy.”

He helped his dad unload the groceries, three bags on an arm each as they headed into the kitchen.

“Oh, thanks. Why didn’t you stop by the butcher’s? I couldn’t decide between the Galadhian brats or the Garula and Lucian pepper.”

Collectively, they placed down all their purchases on the kitchen counter.

“Oh man, the Lucian Pepper? Those are my favorite,” Gladio said. They were imported straight from Duscae and you could tell the difference between the free-range meat outside of the city and the ones they kept in farms here, hence the rarity.

“I know,” Clarus said, removing them out of the bag. “So I got them. Plus, I figured I’d get you some celebratory brats.”

Iris looked confused at him. “What’s the occasion?”

Clarus looked over his glasses at them, raising his eyebrows. “You tell me?” He pulled out his phone and brought up a picture he had taken of them from across the street. “How was OPERATION: Flower Children Save Bird Dad?”

Both Gladio and Iris shared a surprised look.

“You know about that?”

He grinned. “Of course. I never forgot the story you wrote in second grade about the secret mission with your family.”

She cringed. “Oh no! You still remember that?”

Still smiling, Clarus pulled Iris into a hug and kissed the top of her head she had put down in embarrassment. “I loved it. Just like I loved seeing my children threatening some jackass who’s been following me.” He lifted his head up and added, “But if I ever hear you say I said that, I will deny it.”

Laughing, Iris slid the milkshake for him across the counter. “We’re sorry. Honestly, Daddy, you can wear whatever you want. Mostly it was that some guy was constantly taking pictures of you and I had to hear about it every day. Just, please don’t make me read that you have a juicy booty ever again.”

He looked amused. “Juicy booty?”

“Oh my gods,” she said, stepping out of his hug. “It’s worse when you say it.”

Gladio shrugged. “It didn’t bother me so much. Not as much as ‘Sugar Daddy.’”

Iris held her hands up. “Oh my gods, stop. I don’t even want my milkshake anymore.”

“Hrmm. Maybe I should read the tabloids more.”

#AmicitiaWeek #gladiolus amicitia #iris amicitia #clarus amicitia #scriptura #amicitia sibling #amicitia family

101 notes · View notes

thedarklordmegatron · 7 years ago

Text

Amicitia Week - Day 5

Prompt: Gladio learning to braid hair for Iris @amicitias-week

Characters: Gladiolus Amicitia, Iris Amicitia, Crowe Altius, Libertus Ostium, Nyx Ulric

Rating: T (Gladio says a few swears)

I just realised this didn’t post when I went to edit Day 6...whoops!

There was no doubt in Iris’ mind that Gladiolus was the best big brother a girl could ask for.

When daddy was busy he would take her to the park for ice-cream, take her shopping for new shoes and always helped her find the prettiest ones, and when she had a really bad nightmare he’d lay down beside her and sing or read to her until she fell asleep. But there was one thing that both Gladdy and her dad couldn’t do. Braid hair.

Daddy had tried ages ago. It hadn’t gone well and she’d ended up with super short hair after Jared was force to cut away the mess he’d made. Those had been dark days. Never again would she have hair shorter than some of the boys in her class. Now her hair was long again, well...sort of, and she really, really wanted to have some of those pretty hairstyles the other girls wore. But those other girls, especially Laeta, always went on about how their mamas did their hair for them, and Iris didn’t have a mama. She couldn’t go to Aunt Monica. Her hair was even shorter and she never did anything pretty with it.

Which left only one person.

One person who she was going to have to work super hard on if she wanted to get him to learn.

“Gladdyyyyyyyyy!” She screeched, running up the staircase towards her brother’s room - ignoring Jared’s calls for her to use her indoor voice.”Gladdddyyyyyyy!” The door at the end of the hall was thrown open as her brother came charging out, sword in hand and looking terrified. “Gladdy!” She collided with his legs, wrapping her arms around them and whining.

“What’s wrong?” He demanded.

“You gotta braid my hair Gladdy! Laeta said I don’t look as pretty as her cause I don’t have a mama to make my hair look nice! But you’re the best big brother Gladdy and you already paint my nails for me, and pick my dresses, and daddy isn’t allowed to touch my hair cause it looked so bad last time and-” She was cut off by Gladio covering her mouth with a chuckle, banishing his sword back to wherever it went.

“Breathe Iris,” He sat himself down on the floor in front of her, “Right, start again and go a bit slower this time.”

Iris nodded and took a deep breath, “Okay. Laeta was being really mean,”

“The redhead with the super curly hair?”

“Yeah her. She said I don’t look as pretty as her cause I don’t have a mama to make me look pretty. And that I look like a boy cause I’m always around you and daddy.” Gladio frowned and took her hands in his.

“There’s nothing wrong with the way you look Iris-”

Sniffling Iris climbed into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck, cutting him off. “But I wanna look pretty like them Gladdy. I wanna prove that you’re better than their mamas.” His arms wrapped around her, pulling her into a warm hug. “You and daddy are better than any mama but I had to cut my hair off last time daddy tried to help, and you always pick out the best dresses and stuff.” Gladiolus stayed silent for a few moments, his fingers running through her hair in a comforting gesture. “Please Gladdy.”

“Give me some time to practice and I’ll see what I can do okay?” Iris nodded “I’m not promising anything but I’ll definitely try.”

“You’re the best Gladdy,” She muttered into his chest.

There were few things left in the world that could shock Nyx. He’d seen and fought the stuff of nightmares, watched people survive the impossible and had seen Libertus actually manage to get a date. However, he couldn’t bring himself to move from Crowe’s front door because there on the floor of the living room was Crowe, her back pressed up against the couch while Gladiolus Amicitia - the Prince’s gods damn Shield - and Libertus sat behind her. And Libertus was walking Amicitia through the basics of braiding. How was this his life?

“Right...so I just tie it in a ponytail?” Gladiolus asked uncertainty.

Libertus nodded and watched as he did just that, “Yeah that’ll do. So now you’re going to divide it into three equal parts, or as close to equal as you can.” He leant over, watching him closely. “That’s fine, just smooth them out a bit.” It was almost comical watching a man used to stabbing things attempt to be gentle with Crowe’s hair while she played on her phone. “Okay, so hold the left section in your hand, the right in your right and try to keep the middle bit between these two fingers.” Gladiolus remained silent as Libertus moved the section of hair into his hand.

“Why the fuck am I doing this?” Gladiolus muttered, focusing on the task at hand.

“Because you’re a good brother.” Crowe shot back, finally looking up from her phone and waving Nyx over. “Did you bring the donuts?” Scoffing Nyx held up the paper bag, “Good man, now gimme.” Nyx say himself down beside Crowe, handing over the bag and looking back to Libertus and Gladiolus.

“So you’re going to cross this section,” Libertus pointed at Gladiolus’ left hand “Over the middle section, the left will then become the new middle, and you’re going to switch it from your left to your right.” This time Nyx couldn’t stop himself from snickering at the confused look on Gladiolus’ face. “No, like this.”

“Fuck my life.” He grumbled but allowed Libertus to move his hands.

“Cross the right section over the middle and switch it around again...eh, that’ll do.”

“So,” Nyx began, kicking his legs out and leaning back on his hands, “Not that it isn’t nice to see you, which it is big guy, any reason you’re learning to braid hair? Ain’t like you’re going to do it with your own hair.”

Without looking up from his task Gladiolus replied “Cause my sister asked. Apparently some of the girls at school are being assholes, saying she’s ugly cause she doesn’t have a mum to do her hair.” Nyx could respect that. He would have, and had on several occasions, done anything Selena asked of him, especially if it meant seeing her smile.

“And you’re learning so you can do her hair for her.”

“Bingo.” He made a triumphant noise, releasing Crowe’s hair and grinning at the frankly awful braid. Grabbing the braid, Crowe pulled it over her shoulder, running her fingers along it. “What’d you think? Passable.”

“Passable, needs some work but not bad. Wouldn’t necessarily let your sister walk around with this in her hair, at least until you can make it look smooth.” She turned to look up at him, “Iris is lucky to have you.”

Gladio shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck “I’d do anything for her. Thanks for letting me practice on you.”

Crowe grinned at him “Not a problem, but you owe me.”

“Owe us both,” Libertus piped up with a grin of his own. Gladiolus groaned and dropped his head onto the back of the couch.

“Yeah, yeah. Just don’t ask me to commit treason and we’re good.”

Three weeks after she first begged Gladio to braid her hair, Iris strolled into school with her head held high, dressed in one of her favourite burgundy dresses and her hair in an immaculate braided chignon bun.

Iris knew her brother was the best brother ever. There was nothing Gladdy couldn’t do.

#gladiolus amicitia #Iris Amicitia #Nyx Ulric #Crowe Altius #libertus ostium #Amicitia week #AmicitiaWeek #Day 5 #ficlet #vex writes

42 notes · View notes

halcyon-writings · 7 years ago

Text

Amicitia Week Day 3: To Take Care

@amicitias-week Situational Prompt: Gladio and Iris take care of Clarus SFW Slight AU: Clarus survives, somehow. Warnings: Regclar is established, mentions of blood and other injuries (but the description is not too graphic) Read Day 1 Here: x Ready Day 2 Here: x

When Cor had believed that nearly anyone that could possibly still be alive had left the Citadel, he should have ready to leave. Leave the razed building, to leave the crumbled city.

Yet, he continued to search. The further he went, the fewer survivors he found. The remaining Crownsguard dwindled in numbers as he continued, choosing to either watch over the living, or leave altogether. He didn't blame them. This kind of thing wasn't easy for most to see.

Only a few of the crownsguard had continued on with him.

Then he found the King. A broadsword impaled into the ground, through his chest, in a sick display as the sword held him up. The sheer irony of it all was how the King remained standing.

Soon enough, he was alone, and when he got to where the meeting would take place, he found the council there, bodies strewn about, blood on the ground, and then Clarus. His own sword stabbing him through the abdomen, pinned onto the wall.

He was going to turn, but the faintest sound of someone who was barely breathing reached his ears.

Someone was still alive.

It was odd, seeing their father like this, barely alive on the cot they had given him as soon as they arrived at Lestallum.

Iris had called all four of the boys, but as they were in the middle of a hunt, they didn’t see it until afterward, having collected their rewards and going to the Regalia to find someplace to stay for the evening.

That plan went out the window once Gladio called her back, worried about what could have happened for her to call everyone as they all packed up and made their way back to Lestallum.

Cor had found him, she said tear tracks still on her cheeks, and although he managed to do the minimum and somehow was able to bring him here with some other survivors, no one was certain if their father would survive the night.

To everyone’s surprise, he did.

But how could one break the news to him that King Regis was dead?

As ‘secretive’ as they tried to be, the true nature of the relationship between the former King and his Shield was obvious to those that knew them well.

The heartbroken expression on Clarus’ face when he learned the news was on that neither of his children would ever forget, even if they wanted to.

They started off small, Gladio telling him things about the hunts they were on, a funny joke that Prompto had told him that day, anything to get his father’s mind off of what had happened in the Citadel. Iris did her part too, talking to her father about all the things she had done in Lestallum so far as if she were a vacationer and not a refugee from the destroyed capital of Lucis.

At night, Iris would curl up on her father’s side, careful of his wound. Gladio took a bit more convincing but he too joined in on the cuddle pile, on the other side of Clarus. It reminded them both of when their mother was alive, as they were growing up, whenever one of them had a nightmare, they’d all pile into someone’s bed and sleep. As if each one of them was protecting each other from a nightmare.

It would take time for the physical, and mental wounds to heal. But for them, it was a good start.

#AmicitiaWeek #gladiolus amicitia #iris amicitia #clarus amicitia #regis lucis caelum #regclar #mine

44 notes · View notes

peri-crone-al · 7 years ago

Text

Gladio’s Birthday

Day 2 of Amicitia week, and best boy Gladio’s birthday.

Happy birthday, sweet soft flower boy.

@amicitias-week

It had been a long day. If Gladio were honest with himself, it had also been a disappointing day. It shouldn’t matter to an adult man – especially the sworn Shield of the Crown Prince of Lucis.

In truth, it did, though.

It hurt. A lot.

It hurt that, other than quick texts this morning, none of his friends had acknowledged his birthday.

Even Iris, who usually went all out, had done nothing more than give him a cupcake with a candle at lunch.

Now, here he was, hauling said Prince around on a huge list of pointless tasks and errands.

At least Noctis had bought him a drink when they had taken a short break from these stupid errands.

And, to top it all off, heavy clouds had rolled in this afternoon, obscuring the sun and pouring buckets of water on them.

The lights of the city glistened in rain-soaked reflections as they drove, finally arriving at their last stop – a delivery company.

They walked inside, Noctis gave the attendant his information, and two boxes were brought out, a small one and a huge one.

Gladio grimaced, realizing why he’d been dragged along on this trek.

“Why in the Six didn’t you just have these delivered to your place?” He snapped as he hefted the biggest box.

At least I could have spent the last few hours celebrating a bar with other friends.

“These packages need special handling,” Noctis replied, carefully setting the smaller box in the trunk of the car. He waited until Gladio settled the big box beside it and closed the trunk.

They climbed into the car.

“To the Citadel, driver,” Noctis called out.

“Can you just drop me at my place?” Gladio asked, ready for this pathetic day to be done.

“Sorry, big guy,” Noctis answered. “I still need your help getting these packages inside.”

Gladio grunted and sat back in the seat, arms and legs crossed.

It was a very quiet twenty-odd minute ride.

The driver dropped them at a small side door and popped the trunk.

“Thanks.” Noctis tapped on the roof as they climbed out.

The part of the Citadel they’d entered was peaceful, being reserved for visiting dignitaries.

It was odd, but Gladio was too irritated to care by now.

He followed Noctis through the halls to an unremarkable door. It took the prince a moment of jiggling the doorknob while balancing his box on one hip to get the door opened. He flung it wide, stepping aside, searching for the light switch.

Gladio stepped through the door a split-second before Noctis hit the switch.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLADIO!!!!”

A loud chorus of voices yelled out as he was still blinking in the bright lights.

Unknown hands lifted the box out of his grasp as his vision cleared.

Standing arrayed in front of him were his friends and family, a certain prince wearing the biggest smirk he’d ever seen. A banner was hung from the ceiling, over a table laden with gifts and food.

A huge cake sat on the floor, reaching almost to his own shoulders, lit with twenty-three candles.

The gathered crowd started singing, and Iris grabbed his hand, dragging him to the cake.

“Make a wish, Gladdy!” She said, clapping her hands and bouncing excitedly.

He chuckled and closed his eyes.

I wish to be surrounded by the people I love for the rest of my life.

He opened his eyes, sucked in a huge breath, and blew all of the candles out with no problem.

As the crowd around him cheered, the top of the cake flipped open, revealing Prompto, wearing a ridiculous moogle hat. He grabbed a handful of cake in each hand and clapped Gladio’s cheeks, laughing.

“You didn’t really think we’d ignore your birthday, did you?” Noctis sauntered up beside him.

“I’ll admit, I was starting to wonder,” Gladio laughed.

“You have no idea how hard it was to keep this whole thing a secret. I hope you won’t be offended if I never plan another surprise birthday party for you.”

Gladio wiped at the cake on his face, then reached over and smeared a dollop of it on Noctis’s nose.

“That’s all right, princess. I appreciate this, though.”

#amicitiaweek #gladiolus amicitia #ffxv fanfiction

15 notes · View notes

mereelskirata · 7 years ago

Photo

@amicitias-week - Day 1 - Amicitia Tattoos.

Birds/Feathers are so difficult to draw T v T but I tried. Anyways here’s WoR Gladio and Iris with their sweet tats!

#amicitiaweek #final fantasy xv #gladiolus amicitia #iris amicitia #ffxv #coradoodle #i'm close to finishing the coloured version #i'll upload it when finished

14 notes · View notes

amicitias-week · 7 years ago

Text

Only a few days left until we get things started! Who’s psyched?

#Amicitiaweek #gladiolus amiticia #clarus amicitia #iris amiticia

9 notes · View notes

snaurus · 7 years ago

Text

PROMPTS: amicitias-week - prank wars

Pairings: None Ratings: K Categories: Humor Warnings: None

Ignis is so out of his league.

If Square gave us one beautiful, wonderful thing, it’s the allusion that Gladio utilizes his wit for the occasional hijinks. I mean, Noctis blaming him for waking up in Dissidia NT? STUPENDOUS. I can only imagine he honed such skills growing up with someone as crafty as his little sister.

But one thing I did miss is the fact Ignis and Gladio never seemed to rib each other very much. They both obviously have the capacity to have fun, but I wish they’d let loose a little bit more... And so this response for Day 6 of @amicitias-week was born.

[ AO3: Part 1 ]

#AmicitiaWeek #amicitias-week #gladiolus amicitia #ignis stupeo scientia #final fantasy 15 #final fantasy xv #ff15 #ffxv #video games #final fantasy #prompt: prank wars #snarechan's writing #my writing #PROMPTS #writing challenge #underhanded artist

30 notes · View notes

mako-lies · 7 years ago

Link

Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Final Fantasy XV Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Iris Amicitia & Her Mother Characters: Iris Amicitia, Gladiolus Amicitia’s Mother Additional Tags: Mother-Daughter Relationship, World of Ruin, Tattoos, Background Aranea/Iris, Implied Cor/Grace, Grace Amicitia Series: Part 10 of The Ruin Summary:

Iris shows off her ink and gets to the bottom of that secret Mom’s been keeping. Mostly, though, they drink wine.

Written for @amicitias-week. :)

#iris amicitia #amicitiaweek #final fantasy xv #within the ruin verse #grace amicitia #sorry for the link #tumblr was being dumb #my fic

5 notes · View notes

juvenileridge · 7 years ago

Photo

@amicitias-week day 9: make up of day 7 (flowers)

sometimes when you’re suicidal you draw a beautiful man and his flower.

#amicitiaweek #gladiolus amicitia #ffxv #final fantasy xv #gladio #my art #it's 4 a.m.#sadly still alive and drawing #i was going to do iris but i am so tired

111 notes · View notes

widget-2 · 7 years ago

Photo

You are NOT leaving the house dressed like that! (Part 2)

The Shield doesn’t give much thought to what he is wearing/not wearing. He really just wants Iris to bring a jacket. Since she’s already sporting his hand-me-down b-ball jersey, she borrowed his hoodie too. Order is restored in the Amicitia Household.

Amicitia Week - Day 1 - @amicitias-week

#AmicitiaWeek #ffxv #gladiolus amicitia #iris amicitia #gladio #one cannot have dialogue about what G is NOT wearing and not illustrate it #i try #clearly G is not the fashion chocobro #though he picked up a certain term from the immaculate one

283 notes · View notes

halcyon-writings · 7 years ago

Text

Amicitia Week Day 5: Personal Stylist?

@amicitias-week

Prompt: Gladio learning to braid and/or paint nails for Iris. Having long hair? #JustAmicitiaFamilyThings

Read Day One: x Day Two: x Day Three: x Day Four: x

In hindsight, learning how to keep his hair up was actually really convenient. For both aesthetic and training purposes.

Well that, and because of Iris needing help doing her hair for school. Of course, this is before Iris decided that long hair just was not her thing anymore and took it upon herself to cut it with a pair of scissors, much to their father's chagrin as they had to bring her to a salon to fix the uneven cuts.

The meme of their father facepalming while Iris looked delighted in the background was still going around somewhere probably.

The internet was a vast place. So he found a lot of videos that Iris sent him the links to for the different hairstyles she wanted him to try out.

(Growing up, it had been their mother who helped with any hair, and Clarus wasn’t bad at it per say, but, using a vacuum to tie a ponytail should not be a normal way to do hair, and as funny as it was at the time, no one wants to be lectured by Jared as he menacingly holds up a vacuum hose).

Every day after she came home from school, she bragged about how everyone loved her hair and wanted to know who did it every day. To which she’d respond that she had her own stylist, jokingly of course.

However, Gladio did have to put his foot down when Iris brought out the nail polish. But with her skills at guilt tripping, Gladio’s defense didn’t last for long and he eventually caved.

Their father was down for the count as soon as she brought out the big guns: the puppy eyes. He had already resigned to his fate by the time Iris convinced her big brother to allow her to paint his nails for ‘practice.’ But it didn’t mean he couldn’t have his fun either, choosing bright colors for her own nails.

And then word spread on how well Gladio was able to do nails. Oddly enough a lot of people wanted him to paint their nails. (Even getting Ignis as a ‘customer’ was a bit surprising, then again, he wore gloves a lot, so no one really saw them.) No one asked him about the hair though, which was a little disappointing he’ll admit.

Well if there was any consolation about this whole thing, it was that if the Shield thing didn’t work out, Gladio could always put that he knew how to do hair and paint nails on his resume.

#AmicitiaWeek #clarus amicitia #gladiolus amicitia #iris amicitia #as soon as i saw this prompt i knew exactly what to do for it ajksfjakjfa #mine

32 notes · View notes

amicitiaas · 7 years ago

Text

[FIC] Fun and Games

Synopsis

Characters: Gladiolus Amicitia, Clarus Amicitia, Iris Amicitia, Cor Leonis, Prompto Argentum, Regis Lucis Caelum. Mentioned Noctis and Ignis.

Pairings: Clarus/Regis, Gladio/Ignis

Wordcount: 2527

Rating: T

Amicitia Week Day 6: Prank Wars

@amicitias-week

“Why do we have a fire extinguisher out?”

Prompto was the first to actually notice anything, or, more correctly, say something, because this has been going on for years that no one questions it anymore. Everyone claims they want no part of it but everyone always takes sides. There was no neutral ground.

“Don’t worry about it.” Gladio finished replacing all the candy in Clarus’ candy bowl to licorice which Cor hated with a passion.

For good measure, he left a few crumpled wrappers near the bowl so it looked more enticing.

“Do the pranks ever really get so intense that you actually need it?”

“No,” Gladio said, then added, “Well, there was one year Ignis got so startled he actually did use magic. So that’s why we have it out. For our magic users. But no one’s ever gotten hurt, which is the important thing.”

“How many people are involved?” Prompto glanced around Clarus’ office, taking in the ancient weapons, tapestry, and boatloads of paperwork, his first time having ever been in here.

“It started out years ago when my dad, Cor, and the King were about our age. The main rivalry is between my Dad and Cor and everyone kind of just picked a side. Well, Iris is on Cor’s side and I’m with my dad. Don’t bring that up.”

“Okay, duly noted. And everyone just pranks each other?”

“Yes and no. It’s for one week of the year and you’ll know when it starts.”

Yesterday kicked off the week, with Cor replacing his dad’s usual CrownCar pick up with a Moogle Car, its bright red nose, red pom on the antenna the brightest things on the street. Iris lost it when Monica pulled into their driveway and the horn honked a cutesy, but obnoxious ‘kupo.’ Obviously her idea but executed by Cor.

Monica smiled and gave Clarus an “I’m sorry, Sir,” and his dad shook his head. “No you’re not,” he said, and called up Cor. He could overhear the conversation perfectly.

“Don’t be late,” Cor said over the phone.

“I’ll walk.”

“Get in the car, Clarus.”

His father had stood his ground. “Fuck that.”

“Get in the fucking mooglecar.”

Conveniently, Cor and Iris had moved all their other cars and hid the keys, so both he and his dad had taken the MoogleCar to the Citadel.

“Oh man,” Prompto said after hearing the story. “I knew I missed something good yesterday.”

Picking up the extinguisher with one hand, Gladio thrust it into both of Prompto’s arms. “Showing your true colors, then?”

Prompto looked panicked. “What? No! I mean, you gotta admit that’s a pretty good one.” Then, “Do I have to pick a side though?”

Gladio peered sidelong at him as he closed the door to his dad’s office. “How do I know I can trust you?”

“Have you seen my face?” The blond’s expression was one of pure sunshine. Still, even Ignis had turned against him a couple of years. Usually he was annoyed, because the King rescheduled meetings. Despite them dating, last year Ignis had given him a quick peck on the cheek and a “Sorry, love,” before Noctis had warped beside him and drew a penis on his cheek in sharpie before he had to train recruits.

“I have. And I know better. You’re still a recruit though, so you’re still new to the game.”

“I know not to get on anybody’s bad side. At least the ones that matter.”

Gladio smiled. “You’re not impressing anybody by staying neutral. If there’s even a chance Cor or my dad thinks you’re on the other side, they won’t forget.”

Shifting the extinguisher from one shoulder to the other, Prompto sighed. “I don’t have a choice, do I?”

“Pick a side, Argentum. Want to impress the Immortal, who is only the Commander, I might add, or your current Boss, the Captain, my dad. And me, your future boss.”

“What side is Noct on?”

He scoffed. “Cor’s. Probably to get back at me.” He caught Prompto’s look. “Oh, I’d still die for him in a heartbeat, but this week, I wouldn’t trust him as far as I can throw him.”

“And I’ve seen that, so sign me up, Boss!”

“Alright then.”

Gladio made sure his dad’s door locked automatically and as they turned, saw Cor walk down the administrative hallway to his office.

He looked suspiciously at Gladio and then at Prompto. “Prompto,” he acknowledged, his usually greeting. Gladio had picked up that Cor favored—in that odd way of his—Prompto because of their similar upbringing. Perhaps he believed Prompto would side with him this week.

Beside him, Prompto gave a nervous smile. “Marshal.”

They kept walking, but slowed to watch as Cor tentatively checked if his door had been fiddled with and pulled up a log on his phone to see who had accessed it since he was gone.

Gladio grinned. He’d used Monica’s card. Cor believed he had Monica’s fealty this week, but his dad had made a deal with her after the MoogleCar incident.

Cor opened the door slowly and when nothing fell, they saw his shoulders relax slightly.

“What are we waiting for?” Prompto whispered.

There was a loud airhorn blast as the door opened all the way and Gladio laughed. “That. Added it to his doorstop.”

“Very funny, Gladio,” Cor barked from his office.

Prompto snorted. “Oh my gods.”

“Oh, we’re not done.”

Another airhorn, this time louder and longer blared, followed by a very tired, “Godsdammit.”

“And on his chair,” Gladio revealed. “C’mon, we should check up with my dad. Also, I don’t want to push my luck when Cor figures out we switched all the keys on his keyboard.” He typed with two fingers and always looked at the keys. How a physical prodigy didn’t put all that to muscle memory stumped him.

///////

“Hey, Da—” Gladio stopped mid-sentence when he saw his hair. “Whoa. I thought you came home to change shirts?”

“I did,” Clarus answered and pointed at his purple hair. “This was from this morning.” The dye worked even more because his hair was more white that brown now. He was still working out who was responsible. Iris? Cor? Both of them had ample time to mess around with his training bag.

Gladio looked at the sandwich ingredients he had spread out on the kitchen counter.

“I’m making you one, too, Son.”

“Thanks. You could always shave it? It’s getting a bit long, anyway.”

Clarus paused his spread of mustard. “I’m not giving Cor the satisfaction of that again.”

“Again?’

“I never told you? It’s how this whole thing started. Lay down the cheese and the lettuce and I’ll tell you.”

“Deal,” Gladio said, heading to wash his hands and the lettuce.

“Regis and Cor had a bet,” he started. “I think he was annoyed with him.” As they all were back in that day. And still now. “Cor was a handful before…” he paused, the emotion of Cor’s ordeal and shift in personality hitting him again. He shoved it away. Nope, not today. “Before Taelpar Crag. Anyway, Cor lost. So he had to shave a part of my hair. Did such a shitty job of it, couldn’t fix it without shaving everything off.”

Gladio laughed. “What?!? I always thought you cut it to look more formal for the coronation and duty and all that.”

Clarus gave his beautiful long hair a moment of silence. “Nope. I’d still have my hair like yours.” He grinned. “Then everyone really can’t stop saying how much you look like me.” He shook his head, retuning back to the sandwiches. “That little shit. Messing with my hair. And he’s done it again. Doesn’t understand the real value of hair. It’s why he cuts his own hair and has that stupid half bowl cut.”

Gladio snorted. “I wondered about that. It’s been the same for years.”

He gestured with the butter knife in his hand. “You better watch yourself. And your sister. Lock your door when you sleep. I don’t like that look in her eye.”

Gladio gave him an odd look. “You really think Iris will do something? She’s your favorite.”

Clarus hummed negatively. “Not this week. This week she is working for the enemy. That’s not our beautiful, sweet Iris. That’s a monster.” He pointed at his hair again, nearly getting mustard in it. “You think half the pranks Cor comes up with are his idea? Nope. She’s the mastermind.”

Finished with the cheese, Gladio got up to put the condiments away in the fridge. “Okay. And how did Iris side with Cor?”

Ah yes, his son probably guessed it was sibling rivalry, and Iris did always make it a point to go against her brother, but this was brainwashing.

Clarus sniffed dramatically. “I, regrettably, used my innocent baby girl as part of a prank on Cor, but when I went to laugh in his face and retrieve her, he had already turned her to his side. Also, you know you have about twenty Kenny Crow stickers stuck to your back right?”

He sighed. “Cor must have figured it out.”

“How many did Prompto manage to put on him?”

“Thirty-five. I honestly thought Prompto was gonna chicken-out, but he’s a natural prankster. Why’d you have to change your shirt? Twice?”

“Someone replace my hand sanitizer with lubricating jelly. After I changed into my spare, Regis made his fealty known with an exploding pen joke.”

"You know that fades after a few minutes, right? They’re probably setting you up for more pranks right now.”

Clarus pinched the bridge of his nose. Iris probably revealed that he would fall for it, too. He was in charge of security of the kingdom and all it took was his fourteen year old daughter to be his demise. “You still with me to shave Cor’s sideburns?”

“Yeah, I—”

“—Hey, daddy,” Iris said, rounding the corner, surprised to also find Gladio there. “Oh. Is this what you guys do when I’m at school all day? Did you at least make me a sandwich?”

“Hey, sweetheart,” Clarus said cautiously. “Sorry, I didn’t. Why are you home so early?”

She put her bag down on a counter and made a face at him. “I’m half-day today, remember?”

“Or, did Cor sign you out of school?” he asked suspiciously. He made a mental note to look into revoking his authorization to do that whenever it was prank week.

“Seriously? Shouldn’t both of you be at the Citadel?”

Gladio shrugged.

So did Clarus. “I noticed you haven’t said anything about my hair.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Do you want me to? Anyway, can you still take me to get my haircut?”

Clarus made a face at her.

“Don’t give me that, dad. I told you last week. This is for real. Not a prank, I swear.”

“We’ll see. It might have to be Gladio today. I’m a bit behind on work today. Had to come here to change my shirt.”

“Maybe if all of you didn’t do pranks all day…”

“Watch it, don’t act like you aren’t a part of this.”

She held up her hands. “Hey, I haven’t pranked either of you. I’m too busy with mid-terms.”

He saw Gladio considering his watch and then witnessed the exact moment he fell for his sister’s charm. “Alright, sis, I can take you. But if you try anything—”

“—I won’t,” she smiled, a little too widely. “I promise.”

////////

His phone buzzed and Clarus had to force himself not to look too eager to answer it. Regis had called him for a special council with the Immigration Panel, then excused himself with ‘urgent matters,’ a wink at Clarus, and a ‘Lord Cicero, I sincerely apologize, but please feel free to list any and all grievances, no matter how trivial, with with our Lord Shield.’

The last ten minutes he’d had to listen to him drone on in that terrible monotone of his about why Galahdian food was too spicy and why it returned his ulcers. Which he also explained had to do with stress from his time in Galdin. In Galdin. What the hell was there to stress about in Galdin? He almost blurted it out in the council chambers. At least no one dared to ask about his hair.

It was Gladio’s call that had saved him. He had to excuse himself and answered it outside in the hall.

“Dad! She’s a monster! Do you know what she did?? Shut up—that’s not—”

Iris was laughing hysterically in the background. “—Ohmygods you fell for it! Don’t worry, we can still tell if you’re mad—”

“—Cor blocked traffic! He sent me on detours on a planned route—”

Gladio hung up and Clarus wondered just what his daughter and Cor had done. He considered calling him back just to give himself a bit more time before returning to the chamber, but decided that Regis had left it up to him, even if he was pretty sure it was a prank.

As his hand was right about to reach the brazen handle, a cane, a familiar cane, tapped it and barred his entry.

Clarus turned around to find Regis smiling at him.

“Enjoying the meeting?”

Shrugging, he said, “I’ve sat through worse.”

“Apologies.”

He turned, folding his arms and leaning against a column. “What was so urgent you had to leave, my king?” He was the only one who could question Regis.

“I needed to sign the amended trade regulation documents before three.”

Clarus smirked. Regis’ political persona did not work on him, but he liked to give him the benefit of the doubt most times. “Fair enough.”

Lowering his cane, Regis stepped closer, nearly in his personal space. “Thanks for being a good sport, my Lord Shield. And earlier as well.” He lowered his voice. “It’s always a delight to see you remove your shirt.”

Clarus hummed, his attention flicking to his lips for a moment. Regis did always make it up to him after he had his fun, but it was their rule to never do so in any of the public areas. Still, perhaps Regis would break their rule this one time and he would allow it.

To his delight, Regis did, leaning in to give him a quick kiss, but then the cane came back up and Regis held it across his chest, pinning him to the wall. To his defense, he could very easily overpower his King, but Regis gave him a wicked smile, knowing that he would not.

“You traitor,” he whispered, even as he remembered that technically, Regis was the one who started this whole damn thing.

“Treasonous words, my Shield. You’ll have to be punished. Marshal?” he called out.

Cor appeared from around the corner, his smile just as wide as Iris’s had been earlier, and Clarus knew he was in trouble.

“Hey, Clare,” he said, pulling out electric clippers. “An eyebrow for a sideburn. That’s about fair, wouldn’t you agree, Your Majesty?”

Both Regis and Cor’s smiles grew. “I believe so.”

As he turned on the clippers, Cor said, “Don’t worry, it’s just one. I’ve got another eyebrow taken care of already.”

#amicitiaweek #gladiolus amicitia #clarus amicitia #iris amicitia #prompto argentum #cor leonis #regis lucis caelum #scriptura

27 notes · View notes