#Also like. If your thing gets approved does that make you a moderator who is immediately responsible for everyone in your community?

[novorehere]

So like… tumblr wouldn’t manually approve a community that said the word vore in it, would they? Have any of you who are braver than me tried and succeeded?

[the-phantom-author]

also i know i’ve been super MIA but i’ve been on my popstar!gf shit 🤞🏻🤞🏻😔😔

i’ve been thinking that maybe when hasan went to disney w fear& she goes to because they literally love her and want her to do something gahdammit go outside!! stop writing!!! (cue hamilton lyrics “WHY DO YOU WRITE LIKE YOURE RUNNING OUT OF TIME WHY DO YOU WRITE LIKE YOU NEED IT TO SURVIVE!!!”)

and they didn’t actively put her on camera like not purposefully but she would be seen holding hands w hasan or he would have his arm around her shoulder in the background and fans were like OMGGGG we miss her!!!!

she slowly started making some super small appearances on stream, maybe she’d just come and sit with him, she’d put her feet in his lap while she’s out of frame and writing in her journal, always new lyrics. chatters can see he’s rubbing her legs or feet or whatever

maybe when he has something non political on to watch she will come and sit, and just rarely speak but it’s always so funny when she does, she just kinda sitting back and letting him lead and just enjoying sitting w him and his hand on her thigh (not that he doesn’t do it off stream but its always nice to be touched by hasan)

one night she walks in to sit with him but it’s a night that shit is really popping off in politics and he’s started having so many maggots (MAGA followers, that’s what i call them🫶🏻) and the hate and criticism starts and the disrespect because she’s a woman, she’s much younger, her career and dating life, literally anything, and hasan is PISSED after the stream. he saw the chat, he knew you did but you’re always great at ignoring that stuff. but ultimately hasan is like no, i don’t want you on any streams right now

which angers her because um hello she can make her own choices he can fuck right off with that

and it makes him angry that she isn’t listening and understanding his side

they have a few days of pouting, space, but inevitably he misses her and he knows neither of them communicated it well so she comes over and make up and ⚡️make up⚡️

so it’s back to not being on stream but hasan IS NOT going to allow his stream to become a place for hate to fester for her. all of these chatters saying that shit?? permabanned, you’re done.

when it’s something super important like say when the election is actually happening, she will make the rare appearance and he’s closing chat for the duration or having mods go through and approve/disapprove of each comment

to sum it up::::: they’re still the hottest couple known to man and boy does he engage in pda and she still has so so many people that love her. she just needs space from the public eye.

Maggots is insane

The amount of small blips of her that chat gets to see in the Disney stream. Like, if Fear& can't get their gay to come, they might as well get popstar!gf, who is a close second.

They see glimpses of her, on the small word ride, she goes with Will to watch the fireworks, at the gift shop, sharing snacks she's bought from the vendors, ect ect.

And yes, smaller stream appearances, especially when hasan doesn't have a guess, she's just beside him with her journal, he mic is one, just incase she ever wants to say things, so it's no uncommon for chat to hear her mumble lyrics, or for her random no filter commentary.

She gets so upset by his banning of her in his stream room, if only because it makes her feel like hasan doesn't trust her ability to know how she's feeling about things. It does evolve into a fight/argument between the two of you. You take yourself and your cat and leave his place for a bit. It's a lot of silence on both of your ends. Hasan, as much as he likes to communicate about those kinds of things, feels like he's justified and doesn't want to be the first to cave. And popstar!gf, she knows that she is right. He caves first. And yes, the two of them do makeup and /make up/

Her making a full camera appearance! Chat is down and heavily moderated. She's on camera, and in Hasan's chair, hasan is next to her and not the main focus.

They are both happy and healthy and hot as fuck. All is right for that moment in time, even if she does go back to being offline afterward.

[shipfishwrites]

i've been wanting to get into pern rp, do you have any tips/suggestions?

hey sorry for the late response, for some reason tumblr forgot to tell me

thank you for this ask!! i would love to answet it fully and completely but it would be a very long answer!! basically a breakdown of how to scope out an rp that will fit you.

here are some broad based ideas to get you started as you shop for an rp:

check activity. find an rp that aligns eith your preferred activity level -- if you want to perfect every post and trade replies weekly, look for evidence of that, if you want daily replies, look for that

check recently approved characters to see if they match the vibe you want -- a lot of times the lore doesn't match the vibe of the site, so something can look really cool based on the lore but actually have become a different vibe over time

pern rp particularly has a pretty bad time with staffing all of their ranker-players. if eventually attaining a ranking/leadership/plot relevant character is your thing, look for evidence that the admin team does that (evidence, not them sayimg so in the rules)

here's some things i do that may not work for you:

i don't bother to read the rules until i've basically made up my mind if i'm going to try to play there. i go for the dragon info page (and wher page if the site does whers) and read through the description of the canon and special colors. are greens forced/expected to be stupid sluts? are bronzes forced to be noble knightly chads? biiig pass. the way these pages are written can give you a great idea about how flexible and story-oriented the site intends to be. i lean hard either "let me do anything" or "make the restrictions interesting" so ymmv

for jcink rps: go to the bottom of the site, get "today's active topics" and change it to see the past month. pay special attention to who is active in the rp. look at their characters. see if the vibe is right for you

check out the adopts!!! mega points if the admins are cleatly trying to get people to enter leadership positions. big demerits if there is some kind of ban on newbies having leadership. (buying rankers can be neutral or bad, it depends on the site)

for getting into pern rps specifically:

for this purpose i'm going to assume you, nonnie, are somewhat familiar with the books and at least passingly familiar with the art and commentary in the pern tag here on tumblr. i assume you like the books?

it is very important to remember that if the site you are looking at is up front in praising the books, says they really love them, etc., this is a BAD SIGN.

pern rp fandom is (maybe a little bit uniquely?) in an argument with canon, not in conversation with it. there are so many aspects of canon that just suck in an rp setting (ex. lifetime appointment of the senior weyrwoman, meaning the only way to shake that up is for her to die, everything about flights) that even the most canon weyr has yo make concessions to make it playable/comfortable in a group setting.

so if a site up front is like "we're canon. not like those other sites. we actually care about the lore." this is actually a dogwhistle for blatant transphobia, homophobia, favoritism, and really shit moderation. likewise, a tone of anger or vitriol towards more canon-leaning sites is a red flag, they tend also to have extremely narrow views on what the "right" way to play is.

the best way to play a pern game is to take the books as a framework, like baking a cake, that's your flour and egg, you're getting the structure from there but your cake isn't going to taste good unless you get a site willing to spice it up with its little extras and go to the effort of putting some basic butter and baking soda in there to fluff it up. pern in the novels does not work as an open, public rp, it's not a recipe for cake, so everyone adjusts it, the people who say they don't are Lying.

anyway

suggestions

i don't feel comfortable recommending an rp for you nonnie without knowing what you're most interested in. i have heard that at least one site is just starting up so that could be a great place to start.

i'm in the middle of making a site but it's not ready yet

@ followers, kindly recommend your rp spots for nonnie! (don't just drop the ad, give them a feel for the rp. don't leave out the rough bits either, we all know every site has them)

[ems-wrens]

Dragon Age: Veilguard Spoilers Ahead

Just finished my first playthrough of Dragon Age: The Veilguard and while I had a lot of fun, I can definitely see where a lot of the complaints are coming from.

Preface with this is the first DA game I've ever played, and the knowledge I have of the previous titles is limited.

First things first, the things I liked:

Holy shit the combat. That was crazy. Coming from someone that avoids combat focused games (sims and Minecraft, or any mobile game), or has realized they prefer turn based (Baldur's Gate 3) combat, I absolutely loved DA:V's combat. It felt like I was literally flying around the battlefield, and I was only playing the warrior class. I've heard mage goes absolutely crazy in this game and am excited to try it out. It's also really beginner friendly with combat. I've played some of the Spider-Man ps4 games and those were an absolute nightmare (part of that does have to be attributed to my unfamiliarity with console, but I've never been able to pick it up even after hours at a time playing).

Character creation. Oh my god I'm in love with the character creator. I've seen more than a few people complain that their Rooks always look like a gigachad with the jawline but honestly, skill issue. Like genuinely. It took me less than 10 seconds to figure out how to give my Rook a softer jawline and rounded cheeks. I liked the variety in body types and shapes (looking at you bg3 with your body types boiled down to tits or no tits, and occasionally tall titties or tall no titties).

I will say it was disappointing that, despite all the time spent in character creation, I rarely saw Rook. At most, you can see the general body shape and their face for most of the game. A few armors are more revealing, and let you see more of Rook, but all of the casual wear (that I found, I know I missed a lot of them) seems to cover Rook neck to toe. I would have also liked for some of the tattoos and body paints to have been locked for certain Rooks (either permanently or until a certain point). At minimum, labeled in a way that I got a sense of the world itself.

I knew going into the game that elves in DA were the only ones I ever saw with face tattoos, so my Rook (a human) did not get one despite how pretty I thought they were. But I really feel the vallaslin should have been locked for non elf Rooks in character creation. Sure, you can make the argument that to someone like me, who's playing this game as their first entry, would have no clue why they were locked and potentially be frustrated and confused, but that's what the world-building of the game is there for. I also think it would have been interesting if Rook couldn't paint or tattoo the symbols of other factions on themselves until they'd gotten a certain approval from that faction (i.e. my Shadow Dragon Rook couldn't paint Warden symbols until a moderate or excellent standing with the Wardens), however I realize that would probably be a time-consuming endeavor for the devs.

I also really enjoyed the companions. They're fun and have a variety of personalities, without ever being evil (I'm not really a fan of evil companions). I also enjoyed all of their stories, even if the conclusions for some of them didn't make the most sense (the game pushing you to free the archive despite Cyrian dying for it and it being Bellara's life work, I get that it had the potential to be dangerous, but also that was a wild "good ending" for someone who actively studied history her entire life to just...throw all that knowledge away).

While I would never seek to be in the disapproval zone for any character (I'm a people pleaser and even fictional characters need to approve of me or I'll Cry), I think the companions not being able to have negative disapproval is kind of disappointing. They can disapprove of your choices, but honestly as long as you're still bringing them on quests and completing their personal quests, ending the game with anything less than 8 approval across the board is probably very difficult (my lowest was Neve, who still managed to be at 9.5 by the end of the game, and I wasn't doing anything crazy to win her approval and missed a ton of her quests bc I didn't go back to the lighthouse to talk to my companions enough). It could have been so interesting to have companions that would leave (similar to bg3) if you had low enough approval. It wouldn't even require Rook being evil, they could just be constantly making decisions that companion doesn't like. Or even companions that are less helpful and willing to share their contacts if you keep pissing them off, making you the player less willing to bring them along, but knowing it's the only way to actually get them to help.

Okay, the things I really didn't like.

The romance. What the fuck. Granted, I've only romanced Taash at this point, but holy hell. It starts so strong and sensual (they sniff up your neck for gods sake to smell your pheromones), and then you really don't get too many scenes after that. I'm not really one that cares about romance and sex in games, but if you're gonna promise it, I will be expecting it.

From what I've heard, basically every romance in the game is similar to this. Strong start, weak ending with a fade to black sex scene (I've heard Davrin's is the most explicit, but I think I've heard it said that his is still fade to black after undressing). And like, I have nothing against a good fade to black. I don't need to see these characters bumping uglies, but at least give me some foreplay or something before you do so. Undressing and picking Rook up, then fading away to when Taash and Rook are just cuddled up on the bed after is...kind of disappointing. "You sure know how to welcome someone back." (Stated right after supposedly having sex, which i'm not convinced of considering Rook still had their undergarments on) Yeah, I wish we'd gotten to see any of that, Rook.

The writing. I'm not gonna say it was like, the worst thing ever and god-awful and I'll never play the game again, but you can definitely tell it was sitting in development hell for over a decade. Some of it is pretty shaky (how, in this entire group of people, did no one notice Rook would talk to "Varric" semi frequently, and no one decides to confront them. After Rook helped all of them through their issues. That just feels careless, and like Rook is sidelined in their own story, which we'll get to). Some of it outright doesn't make sense (the codex entries for the Crows and their in game behavior never matches up right; what do you mean this is a brutal group of assassins that torture the children they take in to make them better assassins, but also they're just fun cute freedom fighters). Also, from what I've gathered, Solas just straight up being a liar in the final act goes against his entire character from the previous games? Again, I'm not overly familiar, but even just my experience with DA:V, him turning out to just be a liar feels like it undercuts him massively. After promising Rook he won't bring down the Veil, actually, yeah no he's still gonna do that, except it's partially just a play on words because the Veil won't come down by his hands, but killing Elgar'nan is what'll do it instead. That reveal...feels like it was supposed to be more clever than it actually was. "Oh the god of lies and deception deceived me, how could I have not expected this turn of events?" Like, I'm sorry, it would have been so much more interesting had he done literally anything else.

Rook. Oh my god. Rook feels, at times, like the village idiot. The amount of times they say "huh?" or "um, what?" is ridiculous. My Rook is from Minrathous, it was in the character creation. Viper knows Rook. Neve knows of Rook prior to meeting Varric. Why, as we're walking around Minrathous, is Rook constantly asking questions about things, or having confused responses when Neve explains something inherent to the city. And listen, I love Rook's general attitude. I like how they're kind of feral no matter what response you choose (sometimes the dialogue options are just "pick how unhinged you wanna be"), but why, in their casual dialogue, do they seem to know absolutely nothing? Also, and maybe it's just my game, why does it feel like the companions never really talk to Rook much when you're traveling. They talk to each other almost non-stop, but almost never to Rook directly. About, occasionally, but Rook is normally silent and uninvited to these conversations.

It feels like Rook is an outsider to the companions. And I've seen a lot of people say that it feels like Rook isn't even a main character in the game, which after finishing it, yeah. The companions are the main characters, not Rook. Rook almost takes the mentor role for the companions to make sure they're ready for the final battle, but no one ever checks in with them until after Rook was presumed dead in the Fade. No one ever tries to help Rook through their issues, or ever asks if something's bothering them after they've all decided they need to work through their personal shut before fighting the gods. Towards the end, especially after being in the Fade, it almost felt as though Rook was the companions Varric. There to teach them, build them up, and ultimately die for them.

Now, I know Rook doesn't actually die, and the companions do spend a lot of time rescuing them, but it feels...brushed over. I've seen some different things from others, but none of my companions brought up how much they missed Rook after getting them back. None of them checked on Rook except Taash, who even then, let it drop fairly quick. The relationship between Rook and their companions feels very one-sided. Rook so clearly cares (and cares deeply) about their companions, while the companions seem at times nearly indifferent to Rook.

Anyway, these are just my thoughts that I needed to get out. I don't normally go on tangents about things like this, but I don't have anyone to talk to about this game irl and it's been driving me up a wall.

I don't hate the game, and that's a lot of the reason I've been hesitant to interact with anything critiquing it because some critiques have been valid, some have really, really not been. I liked the game, and I will be replaying, but there's some issues that are hard to look past.

This is a little rambly, and I didn't check over to make sure it made sense, but...yeah.

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 13: Budding Spring - Episode 15: Ketchuped Thoroughly

Employee A: I apologize for the inconvenience.

Employee A: We are doing relatively well in English-speaking countries and Asia, but this region is difficult and not a lot of people within the company can help…

Employee A: I’m considering out-sourcing, but I have yet to receive approval. Please at least correct the parts that don’t make sense through machine translation.

Chikage: I can do this much quickly, it’s alright.

Chikage: …

[Keyboard keys clicking]

Chikage: (Is this the last one?)

Chikage: — —

Chikage: (... Same last name? I’m starting to develop a bad habit of reacting on reflex.)

-

Tsumugi: It’s been a while since the voting period started, but the notifications for debut performances don’t seem to be letting up.

Kazunari: There are still a lot of announcements about new theater companies being formed and member recruitments~

Kumon: Oh yeah. A kid in my class also said they wanted to try acting.

Tsumugi: As more people are exposed to theater, more of them want to try it out.

Tenma: And because of the SNS voting, more and more companies are focused on online distribution.

Omi: While working on a photoshoot the other day, I met someone who works in the video industry, and they said they suddenly got a lot busier.

Yuki: There’s also comments from overseas on online reviews.

Tasuku: As they said in the press conference, the New Fleur Award is revitalizing the world of theater.

Azuma: That’s amazing, considering it’s only just begun.

Sakyo: Yukio-san’s the kind of person to be smack-dab in the eye of the storm when it comes to theater. 

Guy: He has gotten busier as the award gains more attention. He has been doing a lot of interviews together with Kamikizaka.

Sakyo: Well, I’m sure Reni-san’s handling that part just fine.

Yuki: The reviews on En.com are also increasingly rapidly, but there’s a lot of bad ones.

Yuki: Even plays by famous troupes and screenwriters have comments like, “They spoke too fast, and I didn’t understand a thing, the costumes were cute tho”.

Yuki: There’s also, “I didn’t understand why, but they suddenly broke into contemporary dance. It was interesting overall, however.”.

Azami: Honest but harsh, huh.

Sakyo: They probably don’t understand the artistic beauty of theater and are just sharing their first impressions of it.

Tsuzuru: They’re interesting to read, but it’s scary to think how that might be us next time.

Sakuya: I wonder what they’ll say about us…

Izumi: Don’t think about it so much and get discouraged. We’ll be fine if we do things as we usually do.

Itaru: Tru. If we worry about it too much and worry our fans, we’ll be putting the cart before the horse.

Yuki: It’d be a good idea to keep review checking in moderation.

-

Yuzo: Good morning.

Tsuzuru: Good morning.

Sakuya: Good morning! Thank you for today!

Izumi: Sorry for calling you here when you’re also busy with your own troupe.

Yuzo: I don’t mind.

Itaru: Have you thought of any strat for the New Fleur Award, Yuzo-san?

Yuzo: We’re just gonna do what we usually do. The pre-voting stung, though.

Izumi: MANKAI Company came up 70th.

Yuzo: We got 103rd.

Sakuya: Lower than us!?

Tsuzuru: Even though you sell out all your tickets and have a loyal following…

Yuzo: Most of our fans are pretty old.

Yuzo: There’s probably people who didn’t know about the pre-voting, or they just didn’t know how to participate.

Yuzo: It seems like it’ll be an uphill battle, but all we can do is be ourselves.

Yuzo: Well, this round ain’t over. We’ll go at our own pace, with no rush.

Yuzo: Still, Yukio-san threw a curveball at us like he always does. I’m always amazed at what he can come up with.

Izumi: Haha… You can say that again.

Yuzo: Alright. If you’ve finished getting ready, let’s start.

Sakuya: Yes! Thank you very much!

-

Yuzo: …

Izumi: What do you think…?

Izumi: (It’s been a while since I last felt this nervous…)

Yuzo: Hah… As rough as ever.

Yuzo: Since it’s a sequel to your debut performance, your interpretation of your characters is good. What you’re lacking on is spirit.

Yuzo: And Tsuzuru, you’ve still got your doubts about the script, so you can’t concentrate on acting it out, yeah?

Tsuzuru: … Yes.

Yuzo: The rest of you guys are too caught up in wanting to put on a good show in order to produce good results for the ranking.

Yuzo: Having to put on a good performance is common sense. I’m sure you guys understand that by now.

Yuzo: So, you need to think about what you want to convey and achieve through this performance on top of that.

Yuzo: Do you want a better place in the rankings, or do you want to show how much you’ve grown…

Sakuya: — —

Yuzo: It’s not a bad thing to want the audience’s reception to be positive, obviously. But if that’s all you’re aiming for, then this is all just a way to earn points.

Yuzo: All your thoughts will be things like, “if we do this we’ll get more popular and get more points” and “if we do that we’ll get extra points”. But what we’re doing here is theater, not a competition.

Yuzo: What is you guys’, what is the Spring Troupe’s acting all about? Who are you doing it for? For what purpose?

Yuzo: You’re doing a sequel for your debut play. What did that debut mean to you guys?

Yuzo: If you’re going to go through with this, wouldn’t it be a good idea to discuss and re-evaluate your origins?

Yuzo: …Heh, but do so with some self-discipline, yeah?

Izumi: (I wonder if Yuzo-san also has various concerns regarding the New Fleur Award?)

Izumi: (No, I’m sure troupes other than Yuzo-san’s do too… It’s not just us.)

Izumi: (What role should our theater company have in this world of theater that is rapidly changing in front of our eyes…)

Izumi: (We may have to re-evaluate the direction we’re headed in.)

-

Citron: It’s been a while since he ketchuped us so thoroughly~

Masumi: Criticized us so thoroughly?

Itaru: But he’s upped his kindness levels recently.

Chikage: Doesn’t that mean he approves of us?

Masumi: But the parts that are no good have become much harder to fix.

Sakuya: That’s true… We can’t come up with an easy answer this time. Our acting… Our origin…

Tsuzuru: It’s surprisingly difficult to just be ourselves.

Chikage: Probably because we’re the ones who understand ourselves the least.

Izumi: We chose to make a sequel of our debut performance with the intention to go back to our roots and remember our beginning…

Izumi: So, what do you think was the best thing about the original RomiJuli?

Sakuya: Honestly, I think I was pretty bad at acting. All I had going for me was how badly I wanted to act.

Tsuzuru: Though those feelings of yours haven’t changed.

Sakuya: Yes! If anything, I love and treasure acting even more now.

Masumi: So, we have to find what our current selves are “lacking”.

Itaru: I do feel like my current self is more absorbed in acting than I was back then.

Chikage: Our bonds have deepened, and we’ve all leveled up.

Citron: I can not think of anything we’re lacking~....

Masumi: But I understand what Yuzo’s saying.

Tsuzuru: Right… He’s also right about me still doubting the script.

Chikage: A difference from our debut performance, huh… For better or worse, it’s no longer our “first time” acting.

Itaru: You mean, like our freshness has disappeared? I guess a writer’s debut work always has a certain kind of oomph to it.

Sakuya: A “beginning” only comes once, so it’s not something we can replicate…

Tsuzuru: So in a sense, we’ll never be able to surpass our debut performance…?

Itaru: Sad but true.

Masumi: Something that can’t be surpassed despite our growth…

Itaru: A “first time” and the image of innocently rushing forward both have a certain kind of impact.

Sakuya: Hmmm…

Izumi: …

Izumi: (Everyone’s mood dampened.)

Izumi: Let’s put this on hold, think about it individually, and then have another meeting.

Tsuzuru: ‘Kay.

Itaru: … Good idea.

[Phone vibrating]

Sakuya: Oh–

Izumi: The meeting’s over, so it’s okay if you go out.

Sakuya: I’m sorry, please excuse me.

[Sakuya walks out]

Sakuya: — —Hello, This is Sakuma speaking.

Sakuya: Ummm, I’m sorry. About that…

Iv: long af maint shiki: i’ve got a test tomorrow, so i might not be on much Iv: we start on thurs Kar: gl Iv: aren’t you also starting soon Kar: been at it since the day before ytd Iv: oh you already did shiki: you’re so chill about it momo has entered the chat Kar: sup shiki: you’re late today Iv: have your tests started too? momo: i ran away from home Kar: sudden mood shift lmao

previous episode | masterpost | next episode

[detransdamnation]

I think I might not actually be trans but I don't know where these feelings come from then, what caused them and what to do against my dysphoria. I just want to be a woman again. do you have any resources on this? thank you in advance

Hey there, Anon.

Unfortunately, there aren't too many resources for dysphoric detransitioned people and what few do pop up either don't last long, cater exclusively to youth or the parents of them, or (in my personal opinion) don't actually do all that much to tangibly help us as people. That isn't to say that the resources do not exist, period—but from what I have seen, they are largely community-based and almost exclusively online (which can open its own can of worms), as academic and medical efforts where they do exist more often concern dysphoric people who are actively transitioning, or wish to make that leap.

That being said, frustrating circumstance does not mean that you cannot take steps to try to help yourself. It's difficult for me to know what, exactly, to suggest, as I don't know you, so I can't make too many assumptions on what, specifically, may have contributed to your dysphoria and what you may find helpful. But not all hope is lost. I scoured the Internet looking for something that could help you, and although most of what has been put out there suffers/ed from the same things I listed above, I did find one organization that may be of interest to you. Gender Dysphoria Alliance aims to better understand dysphoria, all the ways it can present, and the best ways to help those affected by it. This could be helpful to you if you are looking specifically for well-rounded conversation that is supportive of detransitioners and centric of homosexual and female sex rights, critical of the ways in which the transgender community approaches things but also not inherently gender-critical and not necessarily dismissive of transition as a legitimate option for some. There is a members' forum specifically for those who are impacted by dysphoria to participate in, although in order to join, you will need to receive approval from a moderator to ensure the space remains reflective of its intent and target group.

Insofar as the process of working through dysphoria goes, if you are wondering where to start, I came across this archived Substack post entitled Alternatives to Transition: A step-by-step guide to thinking your way out of dysphoria without repressing it*. This is a short, concise article which, coincidentally, outlines more or less the same approach I took (and still try to take) when dealing with my own dysphoria; that you said "I just want to be a woman again" in your submission makes me think it may be helpful for you as well. In essence, dysphoric people—as a feature of our dysphoria—are prone to hyper-analysis and extreme black-and-white thinking. We tend to see (the ideas of) men and women as (often rather extreme) caricatures of stereotypes—leading us to believe that we are, or are meant to be, the opposite sex (or even another gender entirely) because we do not fit those stereotypes. In the process of this re-identification, we lose the ability to understand that very few people are actually adequately described by any of their sex's stereotypes to a T—and simultaneously, that virtually no non-dysphoric person looks at menial things and categorically assigns them a gender (in general, or to know how to conform or not to conform) like we do. In short, we're too in-our-own-heads emotionally to logically understand how things actually are. This isn't our fault as dysphoric people—but it does mean we're unlikely to get anywhere until we learn to reformulate our thinking. This post gives you specific direction on how to start that process.

But dysphoria rarely happens "just because," and in deconstructing your own, you may find that your dysphoria was only secondary to another, greater issue, whether environmental or psychological. This is a little more difficult to give guidance on, as dysphoria which has been influenced by the surrounding environment isn't something that one can change overnight, or even necessarily escape from. As far as psychological issues go, it'd be easy for me to suggest therapy; however, I don't like to because I find it to be a canned response, especially nowadays. It's unhelpful to people who do not have the monetary means to go to therapy, as well as insensitive to those who have had bad experiences which turned them off or even set them further back.

On top of this, what is a great barrier for dysphoric detransitioners in finding psychological help is that many gender psychologists are geared to only support circular, gender-affirmative treatment (i.e., transition is the cure for your dysphoria because you are transgender) in their practice, which—should go without saying—isn't helpful to us as detransitioners, and may even inadvertently harm us. I don't mean to dissuade you from going this route if you feel you need it, or to be overall pessimistic about the state of things (although I'll admit I am)—but I also find it imperative to be honest about the difficulties you may face in finding someone who would be beneficial to you in your specific situation. I will say that in my research for you, I did find one website which offers more well-rounded therapy for dysphoric people; however, it's not something I'm personally comfortable publicly endorsing on my blog because the website itself admits that the advertised therapists are not vetted by the organization itself (meaning at minimum, they agree with the mission statement and probably won't blindly affirm your dysphoria—but that's about all that's guaranteed). Still, if you would like to have this on hand regardless, you are free to message me for the link.

Finally, if you happen to be struggling with the ways in which the transgender community or gender theory has harmed you but are struggling to put the "why" and "how" into words (or just want reassurance that you're not crazy for feeling hurt), I'd like to direct you to The New Thought Crime*. This is a series of five blog posts. Very long read, very information-heavy. However, when I was in your same position coming up to three years ago now, teetering between the two paths, not sure if I even wanted to "take the risk" and disenfranchise myself from something I had spent so many years working so hard to carefully craft for myself, this was what ripped the blinders off and forced me to realize just how much I was harming myself by transitioning. Nothing has ever made me feel so seen and heard in such a dark place. It is initially advertised as for detransitioned women but it is genuinely helpful to everyone no matter their sex, identity, or previous or current relationship with the community. I would recommend it to anyone and everyone.

I hope this points you in the right direction. I wish you luck and perseverance.

*P.S. If you find either of these posts helpful, it would be wise to save them elsewhere, as The Wayback Machine as of late seems to be falling short of its prerogative in archiving lost or deleted Internet pages. Go figure.

[makerofmadness]

People talk about needing to recognize terf rhetoric but I think y'all need to learn how to recognize proshxtter rhetoric too. I keep getting jumpscared by this stuff on my dash 'cus I blacklist proshxt-related tags so they stand out really easily. Even then often I'll see posts that say basically the exact same things as these proshxt posts that aren't tagged as such but I refuse to reblog them because I recognize the type of language used and the topics discussed.

Like bruh if people are complaining about "Puritanism" regarding fanfiction 9 times out of 10 they're just mad that people don't think there's any real benefit out of writing little jimmy x old man johnson smut fanfic with glorified prose going into detail on every stage of buttsex unless you're a groomer trying to use it to desensitize impressionable kids to pedophilia

they act like any form of fxcking moderation and standards is an attack against queer people, even when other queer people are complaining about this because most of us don't approve of kid diddlers either. Also Wattpad has rules and people still post gay mpreg constantly (which is not against the rules) so your point falls apart right there, stop trying to equate pedophilia with queerness you're setting our community back and playing into some of the very homophobic stereotypes that surround us. Just use a site that isn't ao3 for once in your lives and stop gaslighting yourselves into thinking that that's the only place where gay fanworks are allowed when clearly it's not. (No I am not blindly bashing ao3, I do think its tag filtering system is incredible and should be adopted by more websites in general because it really is a miracle for finding the kind of stuff you want. I'm just saying that I found it kinda pathetic how people treat it like any other site is fxcking 1984).

and these people act as if us not wanting child grooming material is equal to us saying that we don't think those topics should be covered at all. Obviously fxcking not, before any proshxtters try to say anything: I am literally one of the like three fans of the white day game series on here and those games cover some REALLY dark topics, including pedophilia. Among other things. The difference is in how it's handled. White Day covers it as a harsh reality and a dark facet of teenage life, one teen starts an affair with her art teacher and becomes pregnant, and she later takes her own life. Stuff like this does indeed happen in real life. And the game doesn't give detailed descriptions of sex scenes between them (which really isn't needed and doesn't benefit anyway except people who get off to it). It doesn't let itself become material used to perpetuate the very topic it discusses. Basically it's not gratifying.

i swear if I see like one more proshxt post on my dashboard I am going to actually try to make a guide to the dogwhistles and things to look out for, but for now I think I've discussed enough to make these posts a little more apparent. Obviously not everyone who reblogs these posts are proshxtters, but the inability to recognize the posts as being from these people is concerning.

[terraliensvent]

Things Tycho needs to implement for the mod apps:

Please hire fucking adults. Not 19 year olds, please hire some people that are over 21 and have more developed brains. Preferably 25 and up.

Heavily restrict the ability to make mod customs. I know that a LOT of people only want to be staff to be able to make customs, and this isn't a good thing to be able to do right off the bat since Tycho needs mods who want to work, not make money making designs. I think mod customs should not be allowed for at least 6 months AFTER mod trial is over. Work on the species, that's what you were hired to do, not make customs. If you want to make and sell designs, apply to be a GA, not staff.

Mod myos. There's too many mod lim myos floating around and these should not be tradeable. If mods get myos as payment every month, they should get two options. Lim myo, not tradeable. Modified myo, tradeable. They get to choose just one.

Also I think Tycho needs to go through the shambling remains of the staff and get rid of loose ends, like Kea. Kea does absolutely fucking nothing for the species except occasionally vote on staff matters and do transfers, which literally any other staff member can do. All she does is ignore trade offers for her obvious trades that totally aren't entertaining offers, which aren't even allowed btw, and she'll talk about opening up customs to get people to throw themselves at her for her art. She needs to be removed as a staff member and made a GA, since that's what she's best at. Plus she's just conveniently taking a break and ignoring all the work that needs to be done and making Tycho and the other few mods do everything themselves. If Kea can't be a functioning staff member in this moment when we really need them, why do we need her at all? Karma, too. Why are you guys taking a break and making everyone else do all the hard work so you can just come back when it's all over and reap the benefits? You guys suck. Either step up and do your job or quit.

i agree with everything you said here anon

on your first point, it def goes back to the maturity thing for me because, while previous mods and the owners are “adults,” 18 and 19 is still pretty immature (and you can really tell based off of the controversies that have happened just within a year)

on the second, i really think terras should make more use of the “official artist” role. i agree that a lot of mods seem to just sit on their ass and make customs/adopts, which, if you want to just do art then say that!! dont present it like youre gonna actually moderate if ur just pumping out adopts, thats why theres the official artist role

for the third point, i actually think tycho does have plans to mitigate the myo situation (you can see that in the conversation i had with him here), so i think theres gonna be some progress there

on your last point, i agree as well; i think kea especially is one of the people who would benefit from being an official artist instead. she has the admin role but ive literally never seen her be an administrator of anything. doing approvals is something that really anyone can do, and the main thing ive ever seen from kea is customs and adopts. i dont think ive really ever seen her answer questions or design help, and as far as events go the only one shes been visibly a part of is the birthday one that just happened (and honestly if i didnt just go and check right now i would have totally forgotten shes an ADMIN, not just a regular mod)

i think delegation of staff and staff responsibilities is a big thing that needs fixing, since its been an issue basically forever in this species. design and prompts take forever to approve, but when its ever suggested to get more mods it was always “we have enough!” yeah, you have an overabundance of mods that just wanna make fucking adopts and nothing else. just make them official artists and have the mod role for people that can actually work.

[ububunes]

Will literally not stop calling that stupid fucking site Twitter or a tweet a tweet. idc what stupid name they come up with. i want that bird back and i want that annoying 50 year old lameass out of his spot as ceo.

I don't like to ageshame or whatever but Elon being like 50 and asking people to call him technoking or whatever stupid name the next neocities prompt site tells him to pick. Man have some shame. Maybe I'm just weak but I'd die of shame on the spot before publicly asking to be called technoking. I can't imagine an ex seeing that or my child seeing it. I'd like. Expel every single awful thing in my body that would make me even ask or say that. Do you want your dick sucked that badly. Are you that lonely. That desperate for. I don't even know?? Attention? Acceptance? Approval?? Other a words????? Yeah okay 'ububnes' is kinda dumb but I've got shame y'know. I can acknowledge that. And not to sound. Absolutely sick in the head but I am an empath (<- aka knows the skill of empathy and is able to actually try and understand what others are going through instead of firing someone because they 'arent working enough' (I still cannot believe he did that without even realizing who he fired. The only time he is funny is when he is not trying to be.)) I can usually tell when people are uncomfortable with what I'm doing and I just don't think Elon can, or he just has too many people who just agree with everything he says and blah blah blah so that he can't even recognize when he's saying something dumb as shit and dragging his barely alive reputation. I would never be able to agree with Elon politically specifically because he does not seem to actually care that much and just does whatever he thinks is 1. Funny and 2. Will get him profits (for the companies he cares about owning anyways.) that any time I hear Elon say anything ever I'm like "ok but does he really mean that." Yeah free speech wooo cool pog but like.... You can't just allow ALL speech Elon... You're allowed to limit specific types of speech dude... Remember when like. Right after he bought Twitter there was like an absolutely unprecedented amount of hate speech suddenly on the site. As in more than usual for Twitter. That's literally why Elon. Some people will post stuff that is LITERALLY illegal in the worst possible way dude. You have to have some limits and moderation!!! It might sound contradictory but you CAN be pro free speech but still limit hate speech. They can still think and say all of that, just not on your platform. I remember how when it happened my mom genuinely thought "it was the liberals" doing the hate speech. Girl what!!! I'm not going to say no liberal ever has done hate speech but the influx of hate speech when the pro free speech guy bought Twitter... It's gonna be people who are 1. Just kinda awful people 2. Want to test how far they can go 3. Sorry mom, more likely conservatives. Anyways they absolutely missed out on the chance to rename to "twt" I don't know where x comes from and I don't care it sounds dumb and like... Idk. Not Twitter. I also said this on my twt but y'know how Facebook rebranded to meta while they were in huge privacy scandals and scandals in general to instead hopefully change public perception of the company and grant them a "blank slate" to hopefully build a new better image. I'm sure that isn't similar at all.

I slept in and just woke up, so here's what I've been able to figure out while sipping coffee:

Twitter has officially rebranded to X just a day or two after the move was announced.

The official branding is that a tweet is now called "an X", for which there are too many jokes to make.

The official account is still @twitter because someone else owns @X and they didn't reclaim the username first.

The logo is 𝕏 which is the Unicode character Unicode U+1D54F so the logo cannot be copyrighted and it is highly likely that it cannot be protected as a trademark.

Outside the visual logo, the trademark for the use of the name "X" in social media is held by Meta/Facebook, while the trademark for "X" in finance/commerce is owned by Microsoft.

The rebranding has been stopped in Japan as the term "X Japan" is trademarked by the band X JAPAN.

Elon had workers taking down the "Twitter" name from the side of the building. He did not have any permits to do this. The building owner called the cops who stopped the crew midway through so the sign just says "er".

He still plans to call his streaming and media hosting branch of the company as "Xvideo". Nobody tell him.

This man wants you to give him control over all of your financial information.

[mjpiercesblog]

Prologue, Part 1

1.           Liam

7 years ago

“Last question in the final stand-off between the Ewing’s and the Barneses,” the moderator states, kindly on board with our rather dated references. We’re in the pub after a day of focused listening and presenting at the 80’s TV conference at Aberystwyth University. We’re exhausted and wired and a little high from the company of so many people interested in the same thing we are. Our group of maybe ten people who have gone out tonight has divided into two teams for the pub quiz, both naming ourselves after one family in our epic Dallas standoff. We drew even and this last set of questions will decide the winner. The 50-something owner of the pub indulges our references with jokes and puns and winks in our direction. “Oh – this one is a good one, period-wise,” he jokes. “In 1996, princess Victoria of Sweden was diagnosed as anorexic. Which clothing brand then came out with a plus-size clothing range as a response?”

“H&M,” Gina says without hesitation.

“How do you know that,” I ask in wonderment.

“Now, hold on. Are you just saying that because it’s the only Swedish clothing brand you can think of,” Jim asks, because he’s the kind of know-it-all PhD student who likes to question women’s expertise. We all hate him, but unfortunately there’s always one. And it’s the conference high of sitting in stuffy rooms and drinking bad coffee all day, sustained by these tiny packets of biscuits, that makes you put up with anyone. Plus, academia is small, chances are that me and Jim will wander in and out of each other’s orbit for the rest of our careers.

“No, I’m saying that because I know it,” Gina says, baring her teeth at Jim.

“What other Swedish clothing companies are there,” he smirks.

“Let’s just go with H&M,” I say quietly, dreading that I need to take a side. Our teammates Amanda and Ollie are engrossed in other conversation at the end of the table and won’t get involved here, I’m sure. I slink down in my chair, almost hide under the table.

“Fjällräven,” Gina starts, “Stutterheim. Happy Socks. Björn Borg. Need I go on?”

“Fjällräven makes rucksacks,” Jim says defiantly, but it’s that kind of childish defiance people have who know they have lost. Him and Gina engage in a staring contest, until Jim gets up to go to the bar, asking loudly, “another round?”

Gina and I give our drink orders, then slowly turn to each other and she lets out a relieved giggle when she finds approval in my gaze. “H&M it is,” I say and write the answer down before I go to the bar to hand over our answer sheet. As I plonk myself down in my seat again, I ask: “How do you know more than one Swedish clothing company?”

“My dad is Swedish,” she admits. She is black, with light skin, so I hadn’t expected her to be half Swedish. Maybe it shouldn’t surprise me. That button nose of hers should have given it away. “And I’m only half-sure about all of them. They all may be Danish. I was gambling he doesn’t know any himself.”

I have no idea what my face does. “You were bluffing,” I ask.

“Well… yes, I guess,” she shrugs. “Or maybe no. I kind of knew from something my grandmother said, but I also wasn’t sure. And he was being a prick. And… seriously… what British person knows a different Swedish clothing company?”

Of course, the questions before this were more difficult, it may still be the wrong answer. And Jim might be a prick, but he could be an aggressive prick, or a prick who holds a grudge. And what if he ends up on a hiring committee that interviews you ten years down the line. The possibility of a drunk pub quiz night from when you were a PhD student hanging over your head makes me shudder. To miss an opportunity because of H&M. Better stay quiet. Stay neutral. Don’t offend anyone. I wish I had Gina’s confidence. I wish I could bluff, but people can immediately tell when I’m unsure. It’s really better if I don’t say anything, because it gives away any uncertainties.

I hum in agreement with Gina and then change the topic to something different. Jim returns to our table with our drinks and Gina gets up to join the other table, no doubt to escape Jim the prick, but my bland conversation probably also didn’t help. Which means that I’m stuck with him, also when the moderator announces the pub quiz winner. Even though H&M was the right answer, the others got more answers right this round, making the Ewings the winner, a fact the moderator makes a lot of jokes about. He even returns to the mic every time he comes up with a new one. Jim leaves Gina’s H&M answer without comment, congratulates the other team with a smile and tries to draw me into conversation about footie scores. He’s boring as hell, trying to impress me with his ‘masculinity’ credentials as if I care. I’m longing for a pink drink, if only to signal to Jim how little I care. Instead, my pint goes increasingly stale. I hate beer, only took one out of politeness when Gina bought the first round and then got stuck with it when Jim asked, “another one?” How do I always land myself in these situations? Too diplomatic to ask for the drink I want, too much wanting to keep the peace to tell Jim that he is the reason people hate white, straight men. I can’t even get myself to hint that I’m gay. Maybe if I proposition Jim, I can finally get rid of him. It feels hours later until I finally build up the nerve to excuse myself to the bathroom.

The pub has a round bar in its middle and the bathrooms are upstairs. When I come back, I stay on the side of the bar facing the stairs. Our tables are on the other side of the bar, so I’m out of sight of Jim the prick. I sit down on a barstool, rest my arms on the bar, then plonk my head down on them and groan.

“What’s wrong, poppet,” I hear a voice ask. From the nasal voice, I expect someone who is embracing rainbows and unicorns and uses the word ‘fabulous’ a lot. He may very well do that, but when I look up, it’s to see a very tall man. He’s taller than me, has a lean, trimmed body and muscular arms. His grey t-shirt is so tight it looks painted on, and it is visible how well defined his abs are.

“I got stuck with Straighty McStraightface over there and can’t anymore,” I whine.

  “Did you tell him to be less straight,” he asks.

I laugh. As if I’d ever do that. “Can you just give me the most girlie drink you can think of?”

“What would that be,” he laughs. His laugh is wonderful. It is both, high-pitched and full-throated at the same time. “You know, gender is a construct, right?”

“I do know,” I answer. My PhD is partly in gender studies, but somehow, tonight is testing all my beliefs. “Just give me something pink, please? And please refrain from telling me pink was once a boy colour or that plenty of women don’t like pink. Let alone pink drinks.”

“What will it be,” he leans on the bar, contemplating the issue. “Vodka cranberry? A cosmopolitan? I should warn you, my job is handing out beer and small wine bottles to drunk students. My barkeeping abilities are limited.”

“Would a vodka cranberry be safe?”

“Well, poppet, you are the first one to ever order one, so we’ll see.” He winks at me and turns around to grab the vodka, pours it in a glass, then gets cranberry juice from a fridge. He leans down, which gives me a view of a beautiful, tight ass in those tight jeans that do wonders for his thighs. I bite my lip at the sight. He adds the cranberry juice to the vodka, and I take a sip.

“Wow, that’s disgusting,” I explain. “Can you give me a gin and tonic instead?”

“Sure,” he smiles. “Are you sure you want this? Because I’ll pour you drinks all night, poppet, but it’s going to get expensive if you order all the girly ones only to hate them.”

I laugh at that: “I actually know I like that one, girly or not. It’s just a shame it’s not pink.”

“I can do something about that,” he proposes. “But I’ll repeat: I’m not a bartender. Overwhelming me with more than two ingredients is putting a lot of trust in me.”

“That’s okay. But if you’re really brave, you can attempt a lemon slice.”

He smiles at me and places a lemon slice at the rim of my glass, then tells me what I owe him and turns to the girl waiting next to me. I immediately miss his attention but dig out my wallet to get the money ready. I see him move deftly along the bar as he serves other customers and collects their money. He still hasn’t come to pick up mine. I wonder if he’s forgotten about me, but I’m patiently waiting anyway.

When he comes back, he immediately jumps into our conversation again, as I hand over the money. “Listen, poppet, I’m working here until around half twelve. If you want to stick around, I’d love to go for chips with you after. Or we can have a drink somewhere else. As you can see, I’m busy now.”

I grin widely. I’m so happy he wants to spend more time with me. “I’ll wait,” I agree. He takes my money and I grab my drink and return to my group, this time taking a seat away from Jim. They leave and I tell Gina with a wink that I’m staying behind.

“No way, the hot guy,” she asks excitedly, pointing wildly (and not subtly) at the bar. Jim’s face is blank. His face doesn’t exactly scream homophobia, but he’s also not happy. Or as impressed as Gina is. Maybe he’s disapproving? Did I tell him about Luke? Shit, I don’t remember. And why do I care anyway? I met the hot bartender when I was hiding from Jim the prick, after all. And I haven’t done anything and am not planning on cheating on Luke tonight. I just want to see that smile again, hear that laugh. Be in his orbit.

The bar staff clean and lock up around me. It’s uncomfortable. I offer several times to wait outside, but the kindly manager won’t hear of it. Then the bartender strolls my way and leads me outside. “I’m Ian, by the way,” he introduces himself.

I chuckle. “I’m Liam. We rhyme.” He bursts out in that wonderful laugh again. “Imperfect as it is,” I add.

“What do you want to do now,” Ian asks.

“You’re local. And you promised me chips.”

“How do you feel about chips, slathered in cheese, on the beach,” Ian asks.

It is a still summer night, the beach isn’t far, the stars and moon shine brightly, and his face is mesmerising. “Sounds great,” I reply.

We walk in silence and get our chips, walk down to the beach, and sit down at a quiet spot. Some students are having a beach party to our right and to our left is a pier with a bar and a nightclub, the music a “thump” in the distance. There are drunk people buzzing around it.

“How do you not have drunk people wandering into the sea all the time,” I ask, observing the partiers.

“Well, there’s around one a year,” he says so matter-of-factly that I have to laugh. He makes me laugh so easily, so freely. I haven’t laughed like that in years.

“Sorry,” I remind myself, schooling my face into something more serious. “Obviously, it’s very tragic for their friends and family.”

Now he laughs. “It’s okay. It’s usually freshers who don’t understand how they react to alcohol. It’s sad because they just disappear, leaving families and friends with so many questions. But… it’s also many other things,” he trails off, his eyes twinkling in the starry night. We sit in silence. “So, Liam, what do you do?”

“Can we not do that,” I plead. “I can give you my academic credentials, you can give me yours, but… who cares?” My dad cares. Luke cares. But I don’t want Ian to. It feels like we’re outside the real world, where it doesn’t matter who we are outside of this moment. Where it doesn’t matter what we do or who we are with. “I’m happy to discuss your passions, but let’s not discuss if we are getting our degrees in it or if we made sensible choices.” I don’t want him to be another person who wonders aloud what you do with a PhD on 1980s US TV.

“Yes,” he says, sounding relieved. “That sounds great.”

“So, Ian, do you know any constellations?” We finish our chips and lie back on the sand and look at the stars, locating the big dipper and Orion’s belt. Our knowledge of constellations exhausted, we make up our own. We lie closely together, our shoulders touching, our heads so close we can whisper to each other. Conversation flows easily as we tell each other about favourite books, films, and TV series.

It feels like hours later, when he asks: “So, what do you want to forget?” Of course, he noticed. We met when I was hiding, after all.

“Myself, I guess,” I shrug, which means I feel his biceps pressed against mine. “I just find it difficult to stand up for what I believe in sometimes.  I wish I could be more assertive,” I explain. The honesty feels good. It feels so easy to say, but I don’t think I’ve ever said it out loud before.

“Why do you find it difficult,” he asks.

“I don’t know. I can live with not being liked, I think. But do you know that look people give you when you openly disagree with them? Like you just humiliated them? I can’t do that.”

“Humiliate,” he asks, confused, turning on his side.

“Yes, as if you’ve personally hurt them.” My dad always looked at me that way. As if I’ve stabbed him in the heart with my disloyalty. “I know, I’m just supposed to let everybody else deal with their own feelings. I know, the patriarchy makes me feel that way. But I feel it anyway.”

“You know, poppet, everybody feels that way.” He sighs. “It takes guts to stand up to someone. It’s hard. You can train it, though.”

“I have to, don’t I?” I turn to him and hide my face in his chest. I breathe him in. He smells amazing, even this late at night, after working all night. He smells of sweat and alcohol and aftershave and… the spicy-sweet scent of himself, I guess. It’s objectively wonderful, even though it should be disgusting. And I like that he’s not humouring me, that he’s honest. A hint of challenge in his voice.

“It’s just something to practice,” he says, touching the small of my back.

“To be fair, we never would have met if I hadn’t had to hide from Jim the prick,” I smile, looking up at him. He smiles back.

“What did Jim the prick do that you had to hide from him?”

“He was being a sexist prick,” I reply.

“So, it’s Jim the sexist prick, to be exact,” he says, and I laugh.

“Well… yes. Who, very strangely, reminds me of my dad in some way. They don’t look the same, but… it’s a similar brand of putting people down. Making me feel like I’m shrinking.” Of course, I was aware of this, but I hadn’t admitted it out loud before. Maybe it’s that we haven’t exchanged our credentials, maybe it’s that we likely will only have this one night before I return to my life, but it’s easier to be honest with Ian. Here, under the stars with the sound of the waves gently crashing in the background.

“Tell me something about yourself nobody knows,” I ask Ian.

“I really like cooking,” he says. At my confused face, he adds: “You don’t know this, but everybody thinks I’ll do something different that makes more money. My family has no money, they really want me to earn. My mum is a lunch lady, and my dad does construction jobs, but his back hurts and he won’t be able to do that forever. If I made a lot of money, they could retire.”

“But you like cooking,” I say quietly, understanding how impossible it feels to disappoint parents. I can’t help myself and stroke along his cheek, looking seriously at him.

“Yes, I like cooking,” he says. He says it so quietly, almost whispers. It feels like he’s admitting something terrible to me, something he never said out loud. Like he’s trying out how the words feel in his mouth. Which is what I asked for, after all.

“What do you like about it,” I ask.

“The way different ingredients complement each other, even draw out new flavours in each other that you didn’t notice before. Or some don’t go together at all.”

“What do you like to cook?”

“You’re going to laugh at me,” he chuckles.

“It’s important. I promise I won’t laugh.” We are lying on the sand facing each other by now. We’re not touching, but we lie close together, speaking quietly. It’s as if the world around us seized to exist.

He takes a deep breath: “I like to experiment with vegan and vegetarian burgers.”

I can’t help but sputter out a surprised laugh but try to make it clear I’m not laughing at him. “Why do you think I’d laugh at you for that? That’s a pretty good thing to cook. Somewhere between high-concept kitchen and the lowly burger. Can be gourmet or the Quorn stuff.”

“I think I’m just used to all the man’s men guys from my degree and my dad’s friends who think you’re not worthy of your genitals if you don’t eat meat,” he admits.

“Well… they’re wrong. You got your genitals for free. And a tongue to taste different flavours.” I try very hard not to think about how else I could prove to him the worth of these genitals and tongue, but… no.

“I wish it was that easy,” he says, sadly.

“I know,” I try to assure him. “Dads are…” what are they? Demanding? Shit? Hard? Difficult? But you still want desperately to please them. To be recognised as their equal. And you do so many things to please them. Including choosing your boyfriend based on what they want. It’s something I rarely admit to myself. I love Luke, but I also think both of us got tired of our dads constantly criticizing our relationship choices. Of branding us sissy boys or worse. “Complicated,” I settle on.

“That they are,” he agrees. “Anyway, I like the kinds of flavour profiles you can create with a burger. How it’s not about creating a proxy of the meat version, which is what the Quorn things do, but how you can let your imagination go wild. It just needs to fit between two buns, that’s the only rule. You can go truly wild with it,” he chuckles. It’s difficult to see in the dark, but I think he’s blushing.

“That sounds amazing.”

“It is,” he says excitedly and then details a mushroom based recipe he tried the other day. I don’t understand what he’s saying at all, but he is so excited, so full of passion that it makes me feel truly privileged to hear him talk like this.

We talk until the sun comes up. There are still two panels at the conference, which I’ll skip, before I drive back home to Cardiff. Ian walks me back to my seafront hotel. We stand in front of it for hours, until the sun is fully up. Then we give up trying to separate and go for breakfast and talk more. Then we go back to the hotel where we now really, really need to separate. When he steps towards me, his face moving closer to mine, clearly for a kiss, I quickly say: “I… I have a boyfriend.” It feels like a record scratch. He moves back with a look of betrayal on his face.

“And you are only mentioning this now,” he asks, looking crestfallen.

“I… I’m sorry.” I could have just not said anything. I’m driving home soon. I’ll probably never see Ian again. I could have kept it to myself. But we’ve only been honest with each other, shared an honesty we likely never shared with anyone. That kiss would have tarnished everything. I want to explain more, say more, but I can’t come up with anything that will make him remember me as anything else than the guy he wasted a night with.

“Well then,” he stretches out a hand for me to shake and I reluctantly take it. “It was good to meet you, poppet,” he says and turns around. I watch him walk down the street until he turns a corner.

I go inside, get my stuff from my room, and then check out and get my car. I’m not sure how I manage the drive home. Considering how dangerous Welsh roads are at the best of times, it’s a suicide mission. When I get home, I’m not sure if it’s sadness about Ian or exhaustion that makes tears well up. I sleep for a few hours, then text Gina from the conference that I’m alive and Luke that I’m back.

I only met Gina this week, but it feels like I can share things with her I can’t with others. She’s seen Ian, she was there. She can confirm he’s real, that I didn’t make him up.

A few days later, I ask Luke for an open relationship, at least for when either one of us is away. Only I ever go away by myself for conferences, but he doesn’t challenge me. If I sometimes imagine his lips on mine are Ian’s, nobody knows. But I’m glad we never kissed. It stops me yearning for what never would have been anyway.

[maneaterwithtail]

[QUOTE="kage15oni, post: 101686863, member: 106939"]

To be fair, have you see the country he is in lately? There is only so much unjust some people can take before alternate options look appealing.

That's why despite people can generally agree Killmonger's plan is flawed, you can find alot of people getting where he came from.

[/QUOTE]

Like many an entertainer he can say things like this with his words never been held to an account half as much as the people he will be charming

He answered gentlemen He is legitimate in the sense that rage is as much a part of the civil rights process as noble intention one tempers the other

And there is something toYou said about the final box of liberty but I don't think that we are a nation or in a situation as a wholeWe're mostly using the first 3 and no small part because thanks to social media we think that the final one is the most effective with no side effects or negative consequences

After all who has more power the dictator of Turkey or the moderator of his own private webform in terms of his constituents

At the very least he can point to a very authentic feeling of what it feels like to be marginalized and how it can seep in

And at least part of it is well for the longest time the holy grail of black summer rights and the caucus was the first black president where we had it and now we are here

A certain level of disillusionment is always going to set in but especially if there were further harm or continuedInequality as a whole or a greater sense of awareness of antipathy based on race relations ideas and assumption

This is This is important in one way the episode about Leandra marine Xavier most were willing to ignore xavier's presence when he was just a nobody in her bedroom but when he was in front of the camera possibly going to claim absolute authority and the importance of being decenter and representative of the Empire possibly even its head of state in the instance that Leandro was in any way incapacitated Even more so when there's this sense that he can just do this without anyone else's approval or assurance that they want to put their trust or representation in him

They were perfectly fine with all the rules that determined this without their input for generations but now that this involves one of the Empire marrying outside of their race when by their very nature they have to have many non bird descended subjects- they even make up their Royal guard - There's a million and one point of order and loyalty tests that are just downright grotesque

And we see how this greater social tension has an interpersonal one in terms of the relationship between Charles and Leandra

More importantly than all of that though is the fact that this is done in a backdrop to very much deconstruct or say how Romeo and Juliet does not actually solve pre-existing tensions and romantic or cultural identity defining tales cam have a split reception

Charles Charles here's a great foundational myth of the Empire and the first thing he does is to construct it as a means of forcing someone into submission when it has just as much elements of to some people and association a piece or a cinderella story

That's very much Tie's in as Bo de Mayo what point out his own experiences as a black queer person because pre-existing social norms cues and myths or folklore either actively exclude him or due to his own personal experience have to apply only partially in an ill-fitting manner and so if he says yes to them he's also saying yes to all of the b******* that they've enabled

So if you're So if your choice is the perfect bride who grants you absolutely authority over them so that that way you can maintain peace or a malicious actor Who keeps saying they're doing this for your shared identity regardless of what their actual actions would result in and if they do actually make a consideration that's worthwhile

It's so much easier to go with the gangster rapper or social vitriol shitstirrer Huey freeman than say George Washington carver-esque or Uncle Ruckus figure.

Especially Especially if they can make you feel both seen and powerful against your immediate foes ignoring the fact that making yourself entirely defined by the people who hurt you so that you can hurt them back actually forbids you from accomplishing the very thing that they are supposedly defending

Magneto for all of his power cannot truly built only destroy. Charles power as well as hope and reconciliation and morality allow for an actual bridge to be built along with the foundation for a community but we also see that it's no easy thing it's not just feel good tactics it involves a great deal of personal risk compromise loss and it's hardly rational looking. Worse while it may not see me from the outside both people use power in a way that diminishes your agency and sense of safety and self but Charles is much more immediate to the point he's very easy to hate. Where as magnito is very easy to admire especially if he's using that power in a way that may give you something that you believe that you need or want

Rogue wants revenge and do not feel weak and vulnerable

Bobby wants a family that actually accepts and loves him without any sense of diminishment or loss

Guy with an extinction level of event in his back pocket kind of offers that

It's very It's very much humanizing the terrorist or the gangster or the ethnic themed criminal

While showing that the rule of law is very often the tyranny of the majority or the presumed righteousnessof the establishment elite

This gets more This gets more so if as a result of their special ability your transgressiveness they can offer something that someone commonly might take for granted such as the intimate touch or ability to act with flike rent display to the greater society celebration

We may not remember this but a few years ago someone basically had one the equivalent of the illottery in the form of an NFL draft pick but this man was gay his boyfriend basically hugged and kissed him publicly on television as a celebration of his basically entering a lifestyle that can very much raise him to celebrity status honor and accomplishment

This is hardly unprecedented for sayGirlfriends who have barely been dating their man for half of a year and regardless of the value of the relationship it's just as soon as a natural or moral thing for them to do sure some people may throw some judgment some way way more than they need to

But it basically cost him his well-earned reward and it was a debate a literal public debate about how much he was allowed or violated protocol to basically romantic and publicly affectionate with his boyfriend who had stood by him while he was training his body to the point of excess in order to accomplish his goal

This is hardly a first or isolated incident especially for black men who especially lately have been embracing less traditional displays of masculinity

A common notice is that you see a lot of queer or queer appearing Blackman now from the son of Magic JohnsonTo a bunch of adopted fathers with their daughters and so on and so forth and this I imagine also ties into what would inspire say bodemayo and how he would approach the plotline of Gambit rogue immagnitos love triangle

it's hardly unique and only about say being able to be in an open straight appearing relationship VS a closeted gay one in terms of physical affection. in fact there's a lot more going on in terms of disability Or hell even hypergymy.. I could very much see that lived or observed experience if not one that he's personally experienced the 1 who would find very personally relevant as it observed phenomena and think that very much affects his life how he would direct or latch on to presenting these 2 desperate elements rogues romance life and how it's led her to these 2 different men and why she would be torn between them

Even more so with the man and his own issues in terms of how much and how confident you can be in his relationship with rogue who's always in this weird marginalized liminal space where everybody knows they have strong affection but they're not really officially or exclusively an item

Again do you not see saying some applicability for being say a black man who is gay and working in entertainment where a lot of them all whole lot of them have had to be relatively on the download or out of sight in terms ofIs their relationships.

Yes it's true Luther Vandross came out as gay much to everyone's partial mockery but what they miss is that he often spent a large amount of time cultivating an image in order to come off as a lady's manAt the very least a highly romantic figure with almost all of his songs as well as public presentation having very little. Celebration or presentation of his long-term partner

I mentioned all of this in order to again tap into the sense of frustration that tends to be labeled queer or black range or what have you

And that's why if you suffer any setback let alone devastating violent ones by a perceived authority or a lack of support from an authority if they didn't immediately turns around to well let's throw us a revolution because it's the only thing that makes sense

So even if you can point to a very public very hatefield action like a depulse club shooting that turns out not to have actually been homophobic but opporto mystic that doesn't change the fact that it triggers that sort of reaction even more so because it makes shows what in terms of tragedy people expect of the minority and how little they expect of themselves to the minority

The problem with this is we don't really see this except for maybe president Kelly everyone else who's alive with the x men is in fact pretty much doing the right thing of being a good Ally

Including Including telling them s*** they don't want to hear or like Hey look I get you guys are hurting but destroying the property of people who did not in fact attack you is going to do the exact opposite of make them open their purse strings and say that they should Dedicate time Blood sweat tears and their own wallets To your recovery when you guys keep doing stuff that indicates that you are perfectly fine with holding hands with known vicious criminals who have even tried to kill you just because you share an identity

Where you put personal social identities like being mutant over being American.

Even more so when you start attacking people who actually are helping you and in fact paving the way to gather intelligence in order to further your cause of getting who the targets are as well as overall Justice and turn the opinion of the public on your side

Yes it sucks that you actually have to do this or something that should be a cut and dry matter of we are the victims let's find the bad guys

That That is the sign of very real discrimination and bias

That doesn't change the fact that some people are actually putting in the effort alongside you in order to do so even as you are less able to do so yes because of your minority/discrimination status

And your reward to them is f*** y** I shouldn't have to do this and you're just as guilty as the people who loaded up a war weapon and devastated a bunch of innocent people who you are spending time money and possible career reputation in order to further the cause of humanizing so that that way we can hopefully turn this around

Cause seriously Tilby has every right to say "you know what Hank f*** y** we're through. no more free interviews where I basically fluff you guys to make you look sweet and marketable so that that way everybody basically signs off on you because they're not really thinking

[bulgariansumo]

I see a lot of people in the tags feeling like they can't share their original work until it's complete and published since there's no place like AO3 for original stuff. But there are! Here's a few of the more popular options.

(Note: Traditional publishers tend to not want stories posted anywhere before they do, so keep that in mind.)

Tapas

Tapas is a most known for its webcomics, but it allows webnovels now, too. The most popular types of stories right now are Romance Fantasy (specifically Isekai Regency Romances), Action Fantasy, and BL.

There are slightly different genres available for webcomics, but for webnovels, the genres are: Romance, Romance Fantasy, Fantasy, Action Fantasy, Action, BL, GL, LGBTQ+, Drama, Mystery, Thriller/Horror, Science Fiction, Comedy, and Non-fiction. Stories are allowed to have three genres, but the first one determines where it shows up in searches and rankings. For example, my story is LGBTQ+, Science Fiction, and Slice of Life, but it only shows up in the LGBTQ+ section.

You can tag your story anything you want. Individual chapters are taggable, but that's just for fun, it does nothing for searchability.

Tapas emphasizes bite-sized content, so novel chapters are only able to be up to 15,000 characters (a little over 2,000 words) in length. Users can like and comment on each.

Images go a long way on Tapas, even if you're writing a webnovel. On your story's page, there's space for a banner, the cover (of course), and every chapter can contain a different thumbnail picture. Here's what mine looks like:

Personally, I like to switch the thumbnails with each full mini-story in my novel. I know someone who switches thumbnails based on PoV character, and I've seen people keep the same thumbnail throughout their whole story. It all depends on what you want!

Tapas has a full ban on AI-generated images and text. Mature content is allowed so long as it is appropriately tagged. They're a little stricter on images than text. As long as you're not writing porn without plot, hate speech, or something illegal, you can write pretty much whatever.

There is a Tapas Forums and a Tapas Discord. Personally, I find it easier to chime in and talk shop in the forums. However, the Discord is where Tapas announces contests and offers feature opportunities.

Royal Road

Royal Road is a website that caters to fantasy, sci-fi, and other speculative novels, with a current emphasis on LitRPG Isekai. But you can post other stuff there!

The site has a list of preset genres and tags. You can select up to four genres and however many of the tags you want. Here they are. The images are a little blurry without zooming in, but I included alt text.

If you hover your mouse over the question marks beside each label, it'll show you its definition just in case you're like me and don't know what some of these tags mean.

Your story goes through a 24-hour approval process, and if the moderator decides that it's fit for the site, it goes through.

Just as a heads up, this site has a reputation for being very strict about sexual content, even when it's appropriately tagged. The FAQ doesn't mention there being a limit, but among authors, it's understood that only 10-15% of the words (or chapters??) in a story can contain explicit sexual content. Sometimes less. So be aware of that.

Instead of likes or kudos, stories have the option to be reviewed on a 5-star system. These reviews are either be a short overview of your opinions on a story, or a more in-depth, "Advanced" review rating Style, Story, Characters, and Grammar separately. This helps (or hinders) a story's visibility. However, if you're friends, family, or live in the same house as the author, you MUST state that in the review, or the author could get into trouble.

Readers can comment regularly, but there's also an option to make it so that they can select passages to point out grammar mistakes and things like that.

You can insert images in chapters, but only if they're hosted on a different site, like Imgur or here on Tumblr. You can also put a poll in each chapter.

Royal Road allows AI-generated stuff on its site. There's an option to mark stories as being AI-generated or AI-assisted (using something like Grammarly to spellcheck or clean up wording). The site does have an in-depth search system that allows you to exclude stories tagged this way. However, there's still a lot of stories that use AI covers.

The site also has forums with a bunch of different sections. There's one specifically dedicated to swapping story reviews, but some people there will read, comment, and review on other people's stories just for fun.

Wattpad

Wattpad is probably the most well-known original writing platform. Its most popular story type seems to be any romance involving a rich and/or powerful guy. Sometimes he's a werewolf.

Its list of genres includes: Action, Adventure, ChickLit, Fanfiction, Fantasy, General Fiction, Historical Fiction, Horror, Humor, Mystery/Thriller, Non-fiction, Paranormal, Poetry, Random, Romance, Science Fiction, Short Story, Spiritual, Teen Fiction, Vampire, and Werewolf. You can only pick one of these per story, but like Tapas, you can also tag it anything you want. Each story is allowed 25 tags.

Pictures can be added to chapters, along with a picture, gif, or video above each chapter. Chapters can be commented on and liked. Wattpad's most standout feature is the ability to do in-line comments, where you're able to comment on specific lines or paragraphs. Also, you can see a chart breakdown of your readers' ages and genders.

Wattpad allows AI covers and AI text, and unlike Royal Road, there's no way to filter it out. The site used to have forums but got rid of them mid-2020. It also got rid of DMs earlier this year.

Archive of Our Own

The average person reading this knows more about Archive of Our Own than I do, so I'm just gonna say: AO3 allows original works so long as they're "fannish in nature," otherwise, they'd prefer you not post them there. Original works are tagged under the Original Works fandom.

General Tips

Do not under any circumstances join Webnovel. It's well known for predatory business practices.

If anyone DMs you on one of these sites wanting to sign you onto another, ignore it. It's probably sketchy.

Read other people's stories if you have the time. There's a chance they might like yours too.

If you don't know where to start finding other stories to read, participate in Read for Reads (Review Swaps on Royal Road). Not every story is gonna click with you, but I've found some of the coolest hidden gems from those.

Forums on novel websites are usually full of other creators. Advertising might get you a new reader or two, but not many.

Some of these sites (especially Royal Road) fall victim to web scrapers posting stories to another site. The good news is that they also copy usernames, so the authors still get credit. Also the views and likes on the other sites are often made up. No one really visits these them except for the authors who found out they've been stolen from. I don't really know what the end goal is... I think Tapas might the safest from this, since you can't copy-paste text from there, but that's just a hunch.

Was wishing there was a positivity post for original fiction writers since I see so many about how fanfic writers are doing so much for their communities even when they're not actively writing, and then I thought:

Be the change you want to see in the world.

So this is a positivity post for the writers out here who are working very hard on stories with no established community. Who can't talk about their blorbos and plot lines and brainstorming to anyone and expect them to know what any of it means. Who don't have much to share publicly, but are hoping they will one day.

You're doing a lot of hard work, and I recognize and appreciate what you're putting into the world, even when you're resting.

[forlorn-plushie]

Chicken Fries, Chicken Tenders, Popcorn Chicken

Chicken Fries: if you were only able to eat food consisting primarily of dipping sauces for the rest of your life, what would you concoct in order to get by?

How like, strictly defined is dipping sauce? If it's just any dips I am making so many breadbowl type things with like, artichoke dip and such. Is queso a dipping sauce? Does it could as primarily if I dip deep enough?

In order to not die I'm gonna have to make my own sauces for sure, just to get enough vegetables and protein and things that are not sugar and fat.

I like a generous interpretation of "primarily" where as long as I dip really aggressively I can eat any sort of dip on like, chips or bread if it's a really thick dip I can get a lot of on a single piece. I think I could live that way. I already love eating slop, this is fine

Chicken Tenders: You are suddenly confronted with the fictional character you have thought about the most, who declares they are deeply in love with you. How do you respond?

I don't even know who this would be. My memory is bad so I don't really know how long my Arcs have been. Recently it's probably my Arknights blorbo Pramanix, but there's a good chance it's actually someone else from a previous era.

But let's go with Pramanix. First things first I am so fucking dead. I can not overstate how dead I probably am. I have to win the approval of Kjera, her personal attendant, de-facto girlfriend, and local god. I have to win the approval of her brother, a man who has never completely trusted anybody and who I have mentioned previously I would probably try to fistfight on principle. I would have to have general favor with Degenbrecher, Gnosis, and Cliffheart.

There's no fucking way! I'm a mess!!! A total disaster! Even if I got my shit more or less together? Still not someone the cast would be happy with, even though I would be. Maybe Kjera wouldn't kill me instantly? I'm not a jealous sort, and Kjera is a good and cool person who I would do my best to be close to in this situation. If I can establish that I'm not a threat (not in a pushover way) I should be okay.

But fucking SILVERASH? No way no how. I do NOT know how to talk to people like him. There's no way he'd approve! It'd be a small miracle to not get murdered in this situation before I meet him.

I am now realizing the question is not "what happens" but "how do you react". I suppose that's my answer - my anxiety takes over and envisions all the ways I'm going to get killed about this. I'm probably also very, very confused.

It's not going well.

Popcorn Chicken: Spheres cease to exist, and are replaced by another shape of your choice (which is not derived from a circle OR a three dimensional polygon with vertices enough to emulate spheres) of any level of dimensionality. What shape do you choose?

I don't post about it too much here, but I am moderately obsessed with Minecraft. So, naturally, I'm gonna say cubes. This also makes a lot of math way easier.

The other answer I considered was the icosahedron, because d20 lol.

[medicalsuppliesworld]

Sleep Right and Avoid Sleep Apnea

Sleep apnea can be helped by changing the way a person sleeps. This can't happen if the person changes their sleeping position. For people with sleep apnea, it is best to sleep on their side. When a person sleeps on their back, gravity pulls their relaxed tongue down onto the soft tissues of their throat. This makes it hard to breathe and causes loud snoring. Putting an extra pillow under your head lifts it off the rest of your body. This keeps the tongue from falling down into the airway. The best height for the head is between four and six inches, because anything higher than that can cause a stiff neck or a sore shoulder.

Interventions in medicine

There are several ways to treat sleep apnea. Sleep apnea mouthpieces are usually recommended by doctors. These are tools made to help people who snore too much or grind their teeth, which is called bruxism. Most sleep apnea mouthpieces are made to fit your mouth perfectly so you don't choke or lose them.

Several people who use sleep apnea mouthpieces and doctors looked into their pros and cons. Since these devices are meant to ease pain and make you feel better, it's important to take the time to read reviews of the different ones on the market.

One benefit of using a sleep apnea mouthpiece or a mouth guard for snoring is that it stops sleep apnea and excessive snoring right away. Unlike surgery and other permanent dental devices, it does not hurt you. Also, it's only worn at night, while braces and dental splints have to be worn all day long so everyone can see.

There are, however, some bad things about it. Since it is small and easy to carry, it is easy to lose. In the same way, some people don't like to have something in their mouths while they sleep. Some people may take a long time to get used to it, which can make them feel bad and keep them from sleeping. Like teeth, these mouthpieces should be cleaned and brushed. More or less, mouth guards that haven't been cleaned well can be very dirty.

CPAP

Continuous Positive Airflow Pressure is what CPAP stands for. It is the most common way to treat sleep apnea that is moderate to severe. A mask is used with a CPAP machine to give a steady flow of air while sleeping. It's like getting oxygen at the hospital, but without the big green tank. Some CPAP machines are now made to be small, which makes them easier to take with you when you travel.

Having a CPAP device is helpful because it keeps air flowing through the airways while you sleep. This makes sure that the brain and the rest of the body get enough oxygen. When people used the CPAP machine, their bodies got better. Some of these claims are that you will have more energy during the day, be able to focus and concentrate better, and, most importantly, sleep better. On the other hand, the cons are the same as those of sleep apnea mouthpieces. Since the CPAP is worn on the outside of the body, the person who uses it may find it annoying or uncomfortable at first. For some people, it keeps them from changing their sleeping position because the device might move.

The people who made the CPAP saw that its big, tight mask was a problem, so they made the Provent. Provent comes with nasal cannulas that go over the nostrils. This is smaller and doesn't get in the way as much as a regular CPAP. Aside from the fact that the cannula and mask are different sizes, Provent is more expensive than the standard CPAP.

Popular Brands of Mouthpieces to Stop Snoring

There are well-known brands of devices that stop snoring that have been approved by the FDA. Snore-Ex, PureSleep, and ZQuiet are the three most well-known brands.

Snore-Ex is a device that you put in your mouth to help stop snoring. Snore-Ex is better than a custom mold made by a dentist because it costs a lot less. The mold is made so that it will fit any mouth as long as you follow the step-by-step instructions that come with it. It can also be used with a CPAP, which makes the benefits of the product even better. Snore-Ex can also stop you from grinding your teeth at night. Snore-Ex is a good deal because it helps with both snoring and teeth grinding.

PureSleep is another product that is OK with the FDA. It is a self-molding retainer that moves the lower jaw slightly forward from its normal position while sleeping to stop snoring. This helps open up the airways and reduces the vibrations that make snoring sound. PureSleep comes with a top and a bottom that can be put together. The good thing about PureSleep is that the mouthpiece can be adjusted to fit the user's bite. Once the pieces are joined, the device is boiled to soften which makes it mold perfectly on the teeth in less than a minute. PureSleep is proud of its patented, adjustable design, materials that have been approved by the FDA, and dentists who recommend it.

A dentist named Dr. Avery Lieberman made the ZQuiet device to stop people from snoring. Because he has been a Dental Sleep Specialist for 20 years, he is one of the most knowledgeable people in this field. He made ZQuiet out of soft elastomer that is free of BPA and latex. By doing this, he was able to follow the FDA's strict rules about keeping people safe. To use ZQuiet, you put it in your mouth. It keeps the airways in the throat open by moving the jaw forward. The developers of ZQuiet are proud of their "Living Hinge Technology," a mechanism found in the device that allows the jaws to move naturally during sleep. Since this product is made of a soft type of rubber, people are less likely to wake up with sore jaws.

Sleep apnea and loud snoring have no right to keep anyone from getting a good night's sleep. Thanks to our sleep experts and dentists, we can treat sleep apnea and get a good night's sleep with their helpful inventions. "Sleep is the best way to meditate," the Dalai Lama once said. Because sleep and rest help a mind and body that have been working all day to feel better.

[pariahsparadise]

what could have been

masterlist

requested by @bellatheslytherclaw - hii, since you did the oliver wood nsfw headcannons i wanted to make one more request for himm. could you write a angst to fluff one shot where oliver broke up with the fem!reader (you decide the reason) and then they reunite years later? thank youuu 💗💗💗

word count- 1.2k

pairings- oliver wood x fem!reader

author’s note- i hate this omg, i’m so sorry. this is a complete wreck, i had absolutely no idea what to do. hopefully it’s still readable? idk, not proofread, i can’t bear to go through this mess again. ALSO I’M VERY SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE I HAD NO IDEA WHAT TO DO. (the assistant is 100% me when it comes to any ship btw, just so you know what inspired his character.)

warnings- swearing. i think that’s it (?)

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

It had never been this bad, Fred thought.

Sure, the Gryffindor Quidditch captain and his girlfriend had a tumultuous relationship, and they often fought and squabbled over the littlest things, but that was all in good nature. It was clear to everyone who knew them that the two were deeply in love, and he and George had been running a long-standing gamble about when the two would get married.

Based on the shouts coming from Oliver’s dorm, he was going to lose.

“You’re not listening!” you screamed, tears of frustration leaking from your eyes. You immediately turned your head away, refusing to let Oliver see.

“Well, maybe I’d listen if there was something worth hearing! All you’ve been giving me for the past hour is a bunch of excuses, can’t you just tell me the truth?”

You nearly let out a sob at his response, having tired of this argument ages ago. “Merlin, would you listen to yourself? I have been telling you the truth, there’s nothing going on between Percy and me! He’s literally your best friend, and you know I would never-”

“My best friend that you seem to have taken quite a liking to in recent months, wouldn’t you agree?” spat Oliver, eyes bright with anger. “What, am I not good enough for you anymore? Not smart enough? Is that it? Does the fact that I’m nothing but a stupid, stupid, athlete bother you?”

Your mouth opened in a protest, but quickly stuttered shut as you watched Oliver raise his hands to his head, effectively cutting off his view of you. You fell silent as his shoulders silently shook with what you could only assume were sobs, and you immediately went to his side. Right when you were about to put your arms around him, he spoke up again, voice muffled against his skin.

“Go. Just go.”

Your heart fell to your stomach, your feet concrete on the floor. You didn’t dare breathe, lest he notice that you were still there. But he did anyway, and though he didn’t remove his hands, his voice increased in volume, any sign of vulnerability he might’ve showed earlier gone.

“Just leave, for fuck’s sake!”

So you did.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

It had been years since the two of you broke up, and you were proud to say that you had finally moved on. Graduating Hogwarts after excelling your exams, you immediately found work in the Ministry of Magic, working as both an Alchemist and a Communications Officer. You oversaw and moderated all connections with MACUSA, a mediator of sorts between the two countries.

“Miss L/N?” came the timid voice of your assistant from the hall, and you wondered why he sounded so...awed. “Your next appointment is here.”

“Send them in,” you said, checking your watch. Whoever they were, they were 20 minutes late, and you decided to give them a piece of your mind.

You never got the chance, as your mind was reduced to shambles when you recognised the man who walked through that door.

Oliver seemed even more shocked than you did, stuttering through his words as he took in your office and you. “W-when Coach said that L/N would be approving my passport, I didn’t think he’d mean Y/N L/N.”

“Oh- um, well, surprise!” You said awkwardly, with too much enthusiasm, not knowing where to look. Oliver had filled out even more since the last time you saw him (if such a thing was even possible), muscles in places you didn’t even know could have muscles. His brown hair was about the same attractive length, his brown eyes as warm as the day they had first found yours. They found yours again, and you felt your insides mesh into a puddle.

A yelp from outside brought you back to reality, and you sighed, knowing that your assistant must have fallen out of his chair while trying to eavesdrop. Gesturing to the seat in front of you, you cleared your throat, trying to push the blush away from your cheeks.

“Let’s get this done, then.”

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“You’re going to America?” was the next thing you said, breaking the tense silence that had fallen between the two of you.

“Aye,” he said, hand rubbing shyly at his neck, “Playing in a match, it’s pretty important.”

“I don’t doubt it, it’s in practically every newspaper I’ve seen,” you laughed, sifting through his documents. “I’m happy for you, Ollie.”

The nickname fell from your lips so easily, you didn’t even notice it. Oliver did though, the hitch in his breath an obvious tell. He looked back down at your desk, watching your hands card through the papers, not too different from the way they used to card through his hair. He shook the memory away, looking up at you through his lashes. “And you? Are you happy for yourself?”

You paused, thinking your answer through before responding, “I am, mostly. Great job, great apartment, great friends.” His face fell slightly, but your keen eyes caught the change in his demeanour, so you hastened, “That doesn’t mean that I don’t miss what could have been.”

Oliver stops breathing, the room is more silent than a tomb. You stamp his passport and file his documents away in silence, and he leaves without so much as a goodbye.

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“Mail!”

Your secretary nearly falls over his own feet as he barrels into your office, throwing down a letter on your desk. You start, a hand shooting up to rest on your heaving chest as you gasp, “For fucks’ sake, what did we say about knocking?”

Your assistant couldn’t care less, as is obvious by the way he practically bounces around your room, as if his shoes are made of springs. “Read it! Read the letter! Now!”

Glancing at the vanilla envelope, you freeze, eyes falling on what’s gotten your assistant so worked up.

Directly under your name is the return address. The letter is from Oliver Wood.

Exchanging a glance with your assistant- his look is gleeful, yours confused- you open the envelope. Finding two tickets and a letter, you set the envelope back down, examining the contents.

Y/N,

I miss what could have been too. I miss the thought of our family, our house, our children racing around in the yard as you scold me for buying them new brooms, but you don’t mean it. You love me, just as I love you.

I miss your hand in mine, your lips on mine, the smooth curve of your calf, the magnificent arch of your eyebrow. I mourn the loss of a future together, what was once our dream.

But I don’t want to miss what could be.

Come to America. Watch me play. Let me take you out for a drink to celebrate our win, or to drown myself in if we lose. Laugh with me as I twirl you around, cry with me as I shout obscenities at the referee. Be with me, love me again.

Or don’t. Maybe I misinterpreted yesterday.

Merlin, I hope I didn’t.

Yours always,

Ollie.

Your eyes shine with unshed tears, you look up to meet your assistant’s keen gaze. “Well?” he demands, about to burst with glee. You feel your mouth stretch into a smile, you can almost hear his jubilant answer when you ask,

“How does a trip to America sound?”

[sanctuaryforalluniverses]

We have to be careful here, though.

I agree that adulthood is special -- after a long fight, I have achieved a mental peace I couldn't have imagined even a decade ago. I'm at a point where I can find real joy in teaching children the things it took me so long to figure out on my own, the things that will prepare them for the long, complicated process of growing up. I also agree that everyone, of every age, desperately needs to accept a great deal more responsibility in their daily actions. If a 10-year-old can learn to turn their homework in on time and not be a dick, you can learn to get your vaccines and pick up your damn garbage.

But what on earth does that have to do with stuffed animals? The Harry Potter people need to accept the fact that J.K. Rowling is as toxic to human life as a nuclear meltdown, but there are thousands of adults the world over that manage to be wonderful members of society while being active members of cartoon-related fandoms. If you think the joys of adulthood Tony Morrison was talking about is spending your free time obsessed with your 401K and what your neighbors are doing with your yards, then there is something VERY wrong with YOU.

And it's very clear the person writing the article doesn't have ADHD, which is not precocious or cute but something that can actively fuck up your life on a regular basis and as much a disability as missing an eye. True, you should keep up with your medication if that's right for you and work to come up with coping mechanisms for things like forgetting texts -- and probably find some nicer friends -- but dismissing something because you don't understand it is a HELL of a lot more childish than forgetting a text. Theory of mind (a.k.a. realizing other people have different needs, experiences, and desires than you) is supposed to develop in childhood.

One more thing. In my experience, there are only two groups of people who are this obsessed with making sure that people are seen as “mature” and “grown up” -- children and teenagers. 

Who needs to grow up now?

“Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.” - C.S. Lewis

This was an interesting article to read. I think it's a little simple but still fun to skim thru.