#Also i love ts so much
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Roman being a supportive boyfriend~
Realised y’all never got to see this one so here you go, put way too much effort into this for a silly meme but hey it turned out good- unironically the best thing I’ve drawn in a while
#I love my boys so much#sobbing#also this virgil is so pretty???#idk how I did it but he’s got no business being that pretty#I kinda need this as an au now#sanders sides#prinxiety#virgil sanders#roman sanders#ts virgil#ts roman
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EVERMORE by taylor swift (feat. bon iver) — “and i was catching my breath, floors of a cabin creaking under my step. and i couldn’t be sure, i had a feeling so peculiar, this pain wouldn’t be forevermore.”
my #swiftiegiftexchange2024 for @lovesickallovermybed!!!! 🫶🏽🫶🏽
#HIII HII HII how are you <3333 SO sorry for being slightly to the party but HII#i saw that you are currently recovering from surgery and i‘m wishing you all the best and =a faster recovery 💗💗 i hope you’re okay and#are feeling and getting much better every day 💗💗💗#i’m your anon swiftie and it was really nice to get to know you!! 🫶🏽 you’re super super talented and your gifs are so so STUNNING#it was such an honor to be your anon for this event and i had such a fun time making this !#i was SO excited when i saw that some of your favorite ts songs are evermore and idsb. really really sorry i didn’t have the time to make#something for both because my laptop went dead for sometime and i ended up only having the time to make this 😭#evermore the song is something i hold and cherish deeply in my heart too and it was something that has seen some of the worst of my days#and so i decided to do this song for your gift instead!#i can’t really gif much and couldn’t even try#because my laptop in which i had installed ps in went rip so i decided to make you this#(slightly messy sorryy) scrapbook of my view of the song! i tried to incorporate some of the descriptive lyrics and the objects mentioned i#the song and i hope you like it 😁!#and because i think evermore is also something that IS meant to be incredibly personal to the people that listen to it#i decided to include some photos (+added highlights on every lyric that has ever touched me which is almost everything as you can see 😭)#of some of my journal pages on which i rewrote the entire lyrics (except bon iver’s addition 😅) in ‘21 when the song meant to me the most!#i hope you're having a great dayy love 🫶🏽🫶🏽#SwiftieGiftExchange2024#taylor swift#tswiftedit#evermore#*my edits#nadine.mp3
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There’s this deep possessiveness at the center of Luffy’s chest whenever he looks at Sanji.
Come with me. Be mine. I want you.
But he can’t take him by force - no matter how much he wants him. Sanji has chained himself to the Baratie with ropes made of grief and guilt, and he’s hard-pressed to let go, even now.
People don’t stay for Luffy, but he’s hoping Sanji may stay with him for the sake of his Dream. That’ll be enough - to have Sanji by his side while they accomplish their dreams together.
Or maybe, he’ll stay with him for the sake of Nami. Luffy knows the way the others have written Sanji’s flirtations off, but there’s a depth to Sanji’s feelings, visible in the way that he looks at Nami like she’s the prettiest thing he’s ever seen, like he’s blessed to have her near him. Maybe Luffy’s not worth staying for, but Nami is. It's why he’s going after her despite everything she says.
No matter the reason, he just needs Sanji to stay.
#thinking of this AU where luffy is immediately heads over heels in love with sanji but sanji is in love with nami#so luffy just has to deal with unrequited love and jealousy because he wants sanji so much but sanji is straight#he's also just more insecure and thinks he isn't worth staying for so he'll take sanji in any way he can get him#meanwhile sanji has a love at first sight thing for nami#and nami definitely has feelings for him too#but she's also pretty messed up with the whole arlong thing so she's just not in the right headspace for a relationship#she buries that shit until after the ts#HOWEVER by the time that wholecake rolls around sanji kind of moves on with luffy after realising that he unconditionally loves sanji#and like finally sanji allows himself to be loved back#and luffy who never thought that hed ever have sanji romantically is just soo happy its insane#and nami's happy the two of them are happy#could maybe be lusanami or sanlunami now that i think about it#but anyway#monkey d. luffy#black leg sanji#fanfiction#one piece#sanlu#lusan#sanami
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i watch baseball for the plot... (© eguchi kazuki)
#love supporting my national t*ts. i mean team. i mean…..#why’s he built like that???? to throw a ball? to swing a bat? to be my wife?????#also. the nikkan sports write up that accompanies these photos just says:#SHOHEI OHTANI’S BEEFY MUSCLES.#ON CLEAR DISPLAY DURING PRACTICE IN SHORT SLEEVES.#yeah………#there’s so much…#shoulders#arms#belly#shohei ohtani#baseball#world baseball classic#team japan
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the thing is this blog and the cuda blog go far and wide in terms on interest but i am at all times one hurtful interview from having a meltdown about mario ferraro...he was so excited to be here...BRENT BURBS WAS HIS MENTOR...slowly everyone he loved or was mentored by got traded...then he had to do it alone while cooch was gone!!! um with mikael granlund and luke kunin. but he was alone!! today ouagh "we owe them better after the last five years" MARIO YOU HAVE ONLY BEEN HERE FIVE YEARS!! DOES IT HURT TO BE THE ONE WHO WAS CHOSEN TO BEAR WITNESS TO THE END OF ONE DYNASTY AND THE HUMBLE BEGINNINGS OF AN NEW AGE!! all these damn ass prospects and young guys talking about how excited they are, how they've never felt this way about the beginning of a season how they're gonna do it for the city the fans they're gonna bring back hockey to san jose.....mario do you feel that same sense of wonder and promise!! mario is there somewhere within you the echo of the young kid who took his best friend to the top of a mountain in marin on a off day during the covid season to say look at the bay area: it's ours......????
#if they don't give him the c after cooch i'm rioting#also if grier trades him. even thinking about that makes me want to throw up#also i briefly thought i was having a panic attack bc my chest felt tight and i was like am i for real abt to throw up over mario ferraro#then realized i tied my dog's baby bjorn too tight to my chest so i can't. breathe#i love him so much 😭😭😭😭#mario not my dog#i mean i love my dog too but his elbow is currently jammed into my ribcage and he won't move it even when i try#i wouldn't put mario in a baby bjorn he is too big#''damn ass prospects'' we are heading into season 4 of the william eklund experiment if you count the 9 games he played in 2021#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#hockey for ts#san jose sharks /
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🔮✨
#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#baldur's gate 3#bg3#baldurs gate 3#bg3edit#ch: gale dekarios#vg: baldur's gate 3#series: baldur's gate#edit: mybg3#long post for ts#guess who got the mod to work#the op of the mod also re-designed the bun and it looks SO MUCH better now#i love this hair style with this robe in particular#cozy wizard vibes~#i might make some gifs later (((':#i wish the robe also had a hood and that that hood wouldn't change the hair#a girl can dream
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Yeah the ts crit community really is mostly on tumblr. If any crit on twitter is brave enough to call out thomas or even just ask a SIMPLE INNOCUOUS question like ‘hey whens the next sanders sides coming out’ they get dog-piled by his followers. Just now my twitter tl algorithm made some posts pop up from ppl I don’t even follow and they’re just defending thomas + his patreon and saying that we’re just angry jealous ppl who don’t understand what goes on behind the scenes for him (as if THEY do?).
I swear, the die-hard fans that are still left, I’m sorry, they’re not a fandom. They’re a cult. A cult of personality centered around one man, purely there to keep stroking and defending his fragile ego. They’re no better than the sw*fties or any other group of ppl driven by blind devotion, obsession and white knighthood.
Oh 100%, there's next to no ts crit community on twitter, I got curious and checked a few days ago, searching stuff like Thomas Sanders Critisism, TSS Criticism, TSS critical, stuff that's used over here and the only thing that got anything was the first, but then it was just showing stuff with "Thomas Sanders" or even just "Sanders" in the post. So it's hard to organize that kind of community, plus the die hards and Thomas being on there.
I'd say the only place the fandom is pretty active is on Twitter, and that's soley because of Thomas, because he interacts with the fans and makes it so that there's motivation to make tss stuff. You know there's a community on there for it and if you're lucky Thomas will see it and retweet it. Otherwise it's kind of a joke that the fandom is dead until it's breifly revived whenever a new episode comes out. Which then leads to parasocial relationships and the idea that somehow continues to persist that Thomas is a poor boy who can do no wrong and if he did do wrong he didn't actually know any better. Never mind he's thirty-fucking-4. And his fans are half his age.
One this I do kinda disagree with is the idea that all his die hards and current fans are like 14, which I just don't think is true, I think they were like 14 when the last proper episode came out, and are now more along the lines of like 18 or around there. He's got a lot of patrons, including 17 people who paying $125 a month, that money has to come from somewhere and I doubt it's all from allowances.
#I cannot stress enough how much I hate twitter also I rarely go on there#and the last time I did I made a post responding to someone who'd found us critters#then had to block that person for my own peace of mind#I really only go on there when someone posts about some bullshit Thomas said on twitter and I go to verify for myself#which is how I found the apology posts from both those people Thomas got needlesly offended by then guilting into saying sorry#which is pathetic#again he's 34 he's been online a long time and should know how to handle people not calling him gods gift to youtube#but he can't#anyway that's my rant#thanks so much for the ask anon asks really do mean the world to me and I love responding to them#ask#ts crit#ts criticism#ts critical
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God, I've been thinking about Remus and Patton in canon, but I haven't known what to say, but now with the finale being worked on, I feel like this is a good time to talk about this. Cause if you go back with a fresh mind (blocking out fanon concepts and just watching the actual material), Remus and Patton don't hate each other at all. In fact, in a platonic/foil kind of way, I think they complete each other, and work well together like Roman and Logan.
Remus never once in canon has insulted Patton. He has offered up uncomfortable ideas, but if anything, Remus has encouraged Patton. He gives him a creative blessing for sanitizing, and seems genuinely confused and surprised when Logan brings up Patton being an issue. Remus and Patton also bounce off one another, what with the creative thing in DWIT, but also in the asides with the "kill-joyman" bit and their interactions in the incorrect quotes (and who can forget the air fryer and Remus being genuinely excited and curious about it). Remus never intentionally goes after Patton, and when you would expect him to lash out at Morality, it's said to the group instead of him directly.
And if you look at Remus' few appearances in canon, Patton's presence actually seems to temper him slightly. DWIT, WMPG (Christmas 2023), incorrect quotes, and the asides are VERY light compared to WTIT. While you could call it a change in approach, it's really not. Remus always behaves this way toward Logan specifically, and in WTIT he is intentionally pushing the other far beyond his comfort. Patton not being brought up to help the issue intentionally makes Logan's problem with Remus worse. Which implies Remus does change his behavior slightly around Patton.
But, if Sanders Sides has shown anything across its run, it's to not underestimate the intelligence of any approach or person, regardless of how smart they appear on the surface.
So if Remus was trying to stoke what he imagines is important, he's not going to intentionally kill Thomas' drive by driving him to the brink. I think a lot of people forget that Patton is passion, not Roman. Roman is romantic and creative, but Patton is the actual feeling of passion and motivation for a project. And without that, Roman (and likely Remus) are just thoughts that get lost. And so it makes perfect sense for Remus to not actually hate Patton. Because Patton has never done anything to him, and is the only way that Remus can actually have his thoughts voiced out.*
*Remember that the Split is not canonical or confirmed. There's nothing saying that something like that happened, as Logan said it was "Like an ovum" which would imply this was how they were born. On top of this, if Remus was mad at anyone for separating out the sides like the Split implies, it would be Janus because he decided what was allowed and safe to be known. Patton probably was a contributing factor, but knowing how Patton reacts to changes in environment and nostalgia, I doubt Patton would've actively chosen to change something so drastically. I could make a whole post about this and why the Split isn't really corroborated in canon, but that's another discussion for another time.
#ts remus#remus#remus sanders#ts patton#patton#patton sanders#ts sanders#ts sanders sides#sanders sides#Oh boy was this in the drafts for a while huh?#But I think it's a good discussion to have#since so much fanon has muddied the canonical storyline and people don't seem to recognize the actual canon interactions as 'canon' anymore#so i thought this little analysis would be fun to clear some air#also love them both and i wanted to write about them so :p
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It upsets me sm that there aren’t inaction figures for TS, Brandi, and Bethany when they’re the main characters of their movies
#view askewniverse#why does the shit demon get a figure and not the female main character. what.#ALSO NO MUSE FIGURE IS CRAZY I LOVE MUSE WHERE IS MY GIRLLL#oh well. At least strikes back had four girl figures :T#also no Rufus figure is crazy where is my boyy I love that guy. I want figures for all the dogma characters honestly#and I just love TS so so much I wanna hold him in my hand and shake him around :(( but alas#ok I guess Brandi isn’t TECHNICALLY the main character but TS is the main character and she’s his love interest and blah blah whatever#SHES IMPORTANT AND I LOVE HER!!! ISNT THAT ENOUGH#hmm maybe I’ll try drawing some of these characters in the animated show/figure style#gotta study the style a little bit more and get a feel for it first!#bleats
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Vocaloid and One Piece collab when...
I like vocaloid and i also like one piece. So i doodled them together. This concept has been in my head for the last like week and i finally put it to digital canvas. I might draw luffy and miku again but more refined and in a "chibi-er" style like meiko and robin since that fits the vision i had in my head more. Thats just the sketch that really inspired me to actually keep it going and i still think its cute regardless!
Bonus of luffy eating the leek
#vocaloid#one piece#monkey d luffy#nico robin#meiko vocaloid#miku#hatsune miku#meiko#oracle draws stuff#IM GONNA MAKE MORE!!! this is just all ive got rn and i really like how robin and meiko one came out so i wanted to share#ive never drawn post ts robin before but ughhh i love her so much#robin and meiko felt like such a fitting pair#i havent fully decided on some of the others but i am scheming rn#if you also have thoughts about this i am open to suggestions for duos though!
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and then i breathed
(a/n): AND SO I JUST STARTED TYPING (enter danny devito meme). basically, i started with an idea for this and couldn't help but keep writing so please enjoy!! serving up a nice view of kennedy x bucky in the stalag because that's where we really see the most development from them, more than anything. and to say the least, i am majorly misty-eyed over this and especially kennedy's character. when first developing her character, i didn't realize how much she'd develop up until this point and i am absolutely loving every bit of her in this angsty, hurt/comfort perspective. and of course, bucky makes the perfect person to put opposite her in so many ways. someone who equals her in humor and dialogue. i sincerely hope you all enjoy - this is almost a love letter to the kennedy x bucky girlies. thank you!! :D
The sound of the plane breaking in half had hit her like a slap in the face.
She remembered the sound so vividly that when the silence consumed her, her mind became overwhelmed by that very sound - the intrepid ripping of metal straight in half as she launched herself out of the belly of the plane, pulling the cord on her parachute, swinging through the war-torn sky alive with flak, enemy fighters and bullets, dangling out in the air, half-hoping something killed her right then and there.
She could hardly remember the feeling - landing in the middle of Germany, mind an absolute wreck, looking around for signs of Lieutenant Bradshaw or Lieutenant Carlisle or even some of the boys who'd been deposited into Silver Bullets after the 100th had run thin and they'd split the girls up.
Jenkins, their co-pilot, Hefner, their bombardier, Thillburn, their radio ops, or their turret ball gunner, Stalinker, their other waist gunner, Klinger, and tail gunner, Gronkowski.
None of them had shown.
She was half-hoping Margie was somewhere nearby, but had come up empty-handed.
She remembered the words that had come through the comms when Lieutenant Bradshaw had said they needed to bail out.
The ringing of that fucking bell.
The sound still wrung around in her head when she wasn't doing something to keep her mind distracted. She remembered it like a stop-motion picture. Flashes of moments that she wasn't sure were even real, but were true enough that her body reacted in ways she couldn't explain.
She watched herself stand in the belly of the plane, pulling the wounded Thillburn over, and attempting to wrap his crooked arm that was knocked into the worst possible position, the blood coating his shoulder and chest, soaking through his coat and covering her hands in a sticky mess.
She remembered him yelling, his words clouded by fear, nothing but a blank thought in her mind - what had he been yelling? What had he been trying to tell her? Were those his last moments of human contact before she helped to plunge him out of the plane? Was he alive? She'd known the kid for a few weeks, with only a few missions run alongside him, but had he been dropped out of that plane and lived? He had family back home, he had a life, a girlfriend he'd been writing to. Was he alive?
The look in his eyes sometimes came back to her a night, when she settled into her bunk and stared up at the wooden ceiling; it came back like a bad dream each night. His eyes boring into hers, begging to keep him alive. The thought made her skin crawl, it made her heart race, it made her want to lose it, trapped in this stupid excuse of a camp.
"You gotta stay with me, Thillburn!" Kennedy had yelled, her throat hoarse practically, her hands slick with blood as Thillburn writhed there on the ground, the whole plane creaking and screaming through the air, parts flying off and exploding off behind them, the yelling in her comms enough to make her vomit, the bell ringing overhead, the entire plane contorting and spinning through the air like the nightmare it had been. Over and over. Thillburn screaming.
Jenkins yelling to bail out, his form appearing in front of Kennedy, as he pointed and yelled to the opening. Her wide eyes filled with terror as she watched Jenkins pull Stalinker up from the ball turret, half-dead on his feet, blood dripping down his face, a giant piece of flak hanging out from his chest.
Kennedy remembered looking up and seeing Lieutenant Bradshaw dropping down from the cockpit, landing with such precision and calculated gusto, that Kennedy was sure that only force on the plane that had kept her level-headed in that moment was seeing Lieutenant Bradshaw come towards the group and calmly manage the situation.
Moving the frantic Jenkins towards the opening and telling him to go, hastily removing tags from Stalinker, and helping Kennedy to guide the flailing Thillburn to the belly of the plane to drop out.
Kennedy remembered the look in Annie's eyes; fear bathed in absolute horror and uncertainty - yet shoving it aside for the crew. To uphold command pilot the best she could. Kennedy remembered hearing Thillburn screaming for her as he went flying out of the plane, like a rag doll in his parachute begging for mercy.
"Kennedy!" he had screamed out into the open air, "Kennedy!"
And that's when she shot awake, her whole body in a damn-near paralysis, as her eyes locked on the wooden bunk above her, the sudden realization of the silence succumbing around her and where she was, along with the pounding of the blood in her ears, racing - over and over.
Slowly, she shifted her gaze away from the top of the bunk and towards the tiny room, all the members of the 100th that were there, completely and entirely asleep. It brought her a slice of comfort to see Lieutenant Bradshaw curled up on the bunk beside Captain Brady, her tiny bit of dirty-blonde hair hardly visible with the current hold Brady had on her there.
Annie put out so much for Silver Bullets that having her safe there in the arms of someone who would lay down his life for her, was a comfort. She could see the laden forms of Major Cleven, Bessie, Crank, Murphy, and Hambone around the place, along with Benny who was in the bunk above Margie, who nearly lay on death's doorstep on a bad day. Days of her current state had left her barely alive, but she was slowly improving.
Slowly, Kennedy brought her gaze towards the window and felt her heart nearly launch out of her chest. Bucky Egan was stood there by the window, his form unmoving, and his head slightly hung downward, his hair looking as if he had tried to get it into some sort of conformed place, but had failed. He looked so much more….quiet, in this light. Where he looked as if he was the only person awake in the room, trying to come to terms with whatever the hell they were currently in. His broad shoulders were still pronounced and held high, but there was something distant and withdrawn about his form that she was sure if she kept staring, he'd fade to black.
"You okay?" Kennedy locked her eyes on his form by the window and swallowed, "I know you're awake, Farley." Kennedy slowly reached her hand up to her chest, attempting to calm her racing heart and keep quiet. She felt if she tried to talk to him now, her heart would pound out of her chest fully and her words would get clogged in her throat enough to make her physically sick. And Bucky would see right through her like she was glass. In the cover of night, she let her walls down for herself and she didn't want another soul to have to see her like that. Broken and vulnerable and cracked all over. Bucky didn't need that. None of them did.
"You were mumbling in your sleep." Bucky whispered quietly again from the window and she heard him shift a bit, like he was moving his weight from one side to the next by the window, his voice still muffled - he wasn't looking at her. Kennedy swallowed.
"Bad dream." she whispered out, her voice unsteady, "I'm fine." She heard Bucky let out a quiet puff of air that sounded a bit like a breathy laugh, but she didn't bother. It seemed by this point, despite all efforts, Bucky could read her like an open book whenever he pleased.
"You sure?"
"Positive." Kennedy answered back, softly and quickly, an uncontrollable pinprick of a smile on her lips, "You get that sorta stuff in your mind with the shit we've all been through." She was playing it off, she was trying to make it seem like it wasn't a big deal - even if she could still hear the bail-out bell ringing in her mind. Over and over. Again and again.
"What was in it?" Bucky asked her, a genuine softness to his voice that made her heart give a dull pound, "Your dream?"
"Nothing." Kennedy said quickly, louder than she wanted - she heard someone shift on a bunk across the room a bit. She blinked a few times as her heart began to race.
For a moment, lying in that bunk, with the only person awake in that room being Bucky, she wanted nothing more than to be standing beside him, reveling in his presence and his body heat and his tall form, telling him everything in that dream and letting him tell her they were fine, that things would be okay, that in a way, it wasn't real. Even though it was. But she felt glued to that bunk. Frozen.
"Nothing?" Bucky said, a hint of a smile on his lips - she could always tell when he was smiling through his words and she couldn't see him. His voice became a bit deeper, and a bit lighter all at once, with a slight hint of surprise and hidden joy he didn't want you seeing. But she heard it every time. "Nothing at all, huh?"
"Serious." Kennedy offered back, "I'd tell you if it was bad. I'm fine." Bucky let out a soft laugh as she continued staring at the top bunk, her mind slowly crumbling into shambles. She wanted to be there beside him, she wanted some form of comfort that wasn't a wooden bunk and the bitter cold. She wanted him.
"C'mere, Farley." Kennedy slowly turned her head and found Bucky, for the first time, looking right towards her bunk, his eyes glowing a bit more in the darkness, reminding her, surprisingly, of Frank, Marianne's cat back on base. Watching her with that look in his gaze that drew her in enough to want to get up from the bunk.
Kennedy slowly shifted, and pulled her long legs over the edge of the bunk, before letting her feet slide to the ground. She stood there for a moment before turning to him and taking quiet steps towards his figure there against the window.
As she approached him, in this sudden quiet atmosphere, where it was just the two of them for once, not another soul awake, she felt every inch of his gaze on her. The moonlight outside reflected the side of his shadowed face enough for her to see that sad, far-off look in his eyes, and the hint of a hollow smile on his lips.
"What?" she asked him, regretting that she could get nothing better to come to mind when she was suddenly stood by his side. She watched Bucky grin at her in the darkness, from right there beside her and looked out the small window again and nodded.
"First time you see the stars out here?" She followed his line of sight and looked out the dusty window pane and, for the first time, just as he had stated, saw the stars. Glowing, twinkling there above them, ever-present and shining just as brightly as they had when she was a small child back home in Boston, staring up at them at night, praying for the future. For a moment, the world went still and she was that young girl again looking at the stars.
"Yeah, actually." she whispered back to him, looking up at the dark sky, before slowly glancing over at him, his full face illuminated in moonlight. For the first time, up-close, she got a good look at the scars on his face, underneath his eyes, the bruising (which was finally, slowly fading) and the way his eyes seemed more sunken in than she remembered. She swallowed.
"How long have you been awake?" she asked him quietly, watching as the corner of his lip curled upwards at her voice.
"Long enough." he whispered, and then shrugged, "Happens nightly. Don't get as much sleep as I want. Half the time, I stay awake because I don't need one of those German fuckers coming in here and pulling some shit." Kennedy stared at him, her heart pounding at the way his jaw had clenched and his eyes had gone dark.
"Nightly?" she asked him, resisting the urge to reach out and tenderly touch that face of his and tuck him into bed. These boys pushed themselves to the edge, it was no wonder all the girls were acting the way they were with these boys out here. They had no one but each other and youth brought a sense of maternal instinct to them all half the time.
"Yeah," Bucky said quietly, before glancing over at her, his eyes big like a puppy-dogs, "it's why I knew you were awake. You stopped breathing heavy - you hear that sorta stuff when you can't sleep at night." Kennedy watched him, her eyes flicking between his eyes and those scars on his face and she suddenly wanted nothing more than to wrap him in her arms and tell him in some way the world would be okay again.
"You've been up every night since you got here?" Kennedy asked him softly, "Bucky…." Bucky let out a soft chuckle and shook his head before looking at her.
"Kenny, it's fine." he said quietly as he leaned towards her slowly, that little nickname Judy usually called her rolling off his tongue with ease - it was always Farley, always, always Farley, what was this? "Never been better. Hey, I'd tell you if it was getting bad, alright?" Kennedy watched him sling her words right back at her and sighed slightly, her worry rising to levels she wasn't sure had been possible.
"So," Bucky said, glancing back out the window they were leaned up against, smiling slightly, "what was going on in that dream of yours?" Kennedy sighed and she heard Bucky laugh quietly.
"Are you seriously going to keep asking me that?" she managed out back to him, as quiet as she could.
"Maybe." he said with a humorous tone to his voice, "You get all passionate when I piss you off, so, maybe."
"I really wonder what goes through your head sometimes." Kennedy whispered back, with a slight bit of teasing in her voice, before she felt reality wash over her and she couldn't help but look to him again, regaining that feeling of wanting some sort of comfort. She couldn't work out the feeling of her nightmares, or that feeling of being alone in that bunk and trying to fight off her mind - it was making her go crazy.
"You wanna know?" Bucky asked her, gently nudging her shoulder, his voice suddenly more serious than she'd heard it ever before, sending her a quiet smile, "I'll tell ya." She watched him, her eyes unable to turn from his in a way that made her eyes glued to his.
"I'm really fucking scared of the way this place'll change me." he told her quietly, that smile on his face fighting to stay on his lips, like a part of him was trying to convince himself that he wasn't scared, that this wasn't what he was feeling, that this wasn't the reality, "That I won't ever get back to the person I was before getting dropped in here like a sack of potatoes." He let out a weak laugh and leaned against the window pane again, "Fuck." Kennedy watched him slightly from her tilted head and watched as he struggled to keep that smile on his face.
"Keeps me up at night. All this shit." Bucky said again, trying to do some more, further, convincing for himself, to make it all plausible. Kennedy felt so quiet beside him that she was sure she felt like a nuisance because of the fact she was saying nothing. But it felt like Bucky was saying things that he'd bottled up and was now forcing out because of the fact it was spilling over at this point. And he was trying to pull it all back in, but failing.
"You're still Bucky Egan to me." Kennedy said, her voice, for the first time in weeks, firm and confident. She looked over at him, with a nod. "You always will be." Bucky smiled at her, tender and gentle, and nudged her shoulder affectionately.
"Thanks, Kenny." he said quietly and she smiled at him with a nod. Then, both their gazes were set out the window pane again. But Kennedy was itching to say something, to get her voice to work. She felt like she needed to say something else. Almost awkwardly, she reached up to rub behind her neck before glancing at Bucky again.
"I was reliving when the plane got hit." Kennedy said quietly, causing Bucky to look towards her with a mixture of surprise and worry written all over his face, "The dream. It was like I was on the plane again as it went down. As Annie told us to bail. It happens all the time. At night, even when I nap. It's always in my mind. Those final moments." His eyes worriedly washed over her face as she stood beside him, suddenly any sort of stars or moonlight seemingly forgotten about and his focus solely on her.
"Every night?"
"Mostly." she offered, with a nod, "You get used to it. The bail out bell. The plane snapping in half like a toothpick. The screaming." Kennedy shivered, with a nervous smile on her lips.
"You could've woken me up." he offered to her and she shook her head.
"I usually just count back from 100 and then I'm asleep again," she told him quietly, "my mind's usually blank the second time I get myself to sleep anyway." Bucky stood frozen beside her, his body ridged and his eyes hard and narrowed. He slowly nodded, like taking in what she was saying was physically hurting him.
"Thillburn?" he asked her. She must've been mumbling his name on her lips at night. He must be dead.
"Radio ops." she said quietly, "He was half-dead when Annie and I got his parachute on him and got him out. Haven't seen him since."
"What happened to him?" Bucky asked, his voice distant.
"Flak got him…..I think. Came right through the side of the plane." Kennedy managed, as her eyes became misty, "He was begging for me to save him, ya know?" She looked over at Bucky and that moonlight bathing his face and sniffled slightly, before shrugging and looking back down at her fingers, knotted into one another, her thumb rubbing in that same spot over and over when she was worried. She let out a shuddering breath.
"Kennedy, Kennedy, he yelled, over and over. Don't know if I even did anything to save him." Kennedy managed out, "I just hope he landed somewhere…..and if he went, it was peaceful. Ya know?" She looked to Bucky and watched him nod firmly at her - even just seeing him acknowledge her was enough to know in a way that she wasn't crazy deep down. That someone was listening to her and she didn't sound like she was talking out of her ass to him.
"Stalinker. Ball turret gunner," Kennedy offered looking over at Bucky, "must've died on impact. Flak got him." What if that had been Judy, Kennedy thought quietly, feeling her stomach turn.
"Jenkins, our co-pilot. He disappeared somewhere in the clouds." Kennedy said softly, "They were shooting at us after we jumped out. The Germans." Bucky's grip on the window pane made his knuckle turn white and she saw him glance over at her with a stern look in his gaze.
"It just…it lives in my mind. That moment, those 15 minutes of hell," Kennedy said softly, "it's so stupid, but I just can't get it out of mind. Thank God for Annie, hell she was the only stable one of us up there. She's the only reason I'm probably alive."
"Bradshaw's pretty good for that, huh?" Bucky said, his voice more strained than it had been and she nodded as she looked over at him, "She keeps us all going more often than not." Kennedy managed a shaky smile and nodded to him as her eyes welled with tears. He slowly looked towards her and noticed that look in her eyes, nearly quicker than herself and offered her a weak smile.
Bucky didn't take another second though to reach out to her shoulder, closing that small distance between them, rubbing his hand against her shoulder, in circles, over and over, allowing her to catch her breath for a moment, knowing he was right there beside her.
"It's not stupid, Kenny," Bucky said quietly, his thumb brushing against the bare skin on the back of her neck, "you know that. The shit we went through, how we all got here. It was all fucking hell. Thought I was gonna die out there. I'm half-surprised I'm even standing here talking to you now."
"I'm glad you are."
"Thanks, Kenny." She managed a watery smile his way as he smiled weakly back. They watched each other in the quietness for a moment, and she watched as Bucky smiled wider at her, which made her feel safer in that moment more than anything else.
"C'mere, Kenny." he said quietly, pulling with that arm on her shoulder to him. And with how weak and broken she felt, she took that small step between them, and let him pull her into his arms, collapsing into his warm embrace, her face breaking against his chest, as his arms wrapped around her, holding her up against his form.
Kennedy had become pretty good at crying without making a noise, but with each tremor that came from her body, she could hear her silent whimper in the back of her throat that was enough to make her fracture more.
The sound made her think of when she was younger, racing after her brothers on Main Street, unable to catch up to them because she was the youngest sibling and the shortest with the smallest legs. And she'd usually trip and split open her knee and be sobbing her heart out. And then her brothers would come back and coddle her and wrap up her knee with some fabric from one of their shirts and help her back home for her Ma to fuss over.
And soon enough, it happened all the time, and she was able to mask it all. She'd brush off her brothers and her Ma and she toughened up, so she could keep playing.
Eventually it became her way to hide everything from everyone.
But with the way Bucky was holding her, she knew he was looking through her like glass, like he always did.
Kennedy could feel his warm breath from his slow-moving breathing, washing down on top of her as his one hand stayed steady on her lower back and the other lingered between the back of her head and her neck, her unruly hair mused in his fingers as he continued to hold her there. A part of her told her to stand up, move away from his embrace and his arms and him; she was strong enough on her own, she could handle this. But her other half told her to stay there, let him hold her, in the cover of darkness, in the middle of the night - someone was willing to hold her there and not let go. No one had ever been like that towards her, no previous person in her life had been such a way around her.
Holding her in the cover of darkness to try to chase away any sort of nightmare like the ones she always had.
Slowly, she turned her cheek against his chest and listened to the soft pound of his heart in his chest. Her cheeks wet with fresh tears, her eyes itchy and no doubt beet red, she couldn't help but relish the feel of his arms around her - he was so warm, so present, just standing there. It was like the ocean waves had crashed over her, pummeling her down onto the sand, and were finally, slowly receding again, letting her breathe. Kennedy slowly pulled her face from his chest and looked up to search for his eyes again and found him already watching her with that quiet look of his; she attempted to smile.
"I'm sorry if the front of your shirt is wet. It's cold enough as it is," she whispered quietly, her voice sounding like she had been yelling for hours, "thank you, Bucky." Bucky quirked out that lopsided grin of his.
"I don't mind. Honored to have a woman like you wrapped in my arms," he whispered back to her quietly, a small laugh following, "I think we should do this more often." Kennedy sniffled out a small laugh, reaching her hand up to flick his shoulder in her weak attempt at protest that she always did with him. But with the way he was looking at her and holding her, she couldn't keep up their usual banter it seemed and just let him hold her.
"You think?" she whispered back, and then sniffled, smiling slightly, "You tell anyone about this and it's on-sight, alright, Major?"
"Yes, ma'am." he said, his voice low as she let out a small laugh and rolled her eyes at him, not entirely minding the feeling of his gaze on her and hands pressed onto her back. She watched him for a moment, before he cleared his throat.
"Hop in my bunk," he said quietly, "you'll sleep better. I'll be your knight-in-shining-armor or some shit. Fight off the nightmares." Kennedy watched him, her cheeks blazing, her eyebrows rising in surprise.
"Uh…really-"
"Yeah, yeah, seriously," Bucky said, "anyone's got questions, I'll give 'em their answers, alright?" Kennedy watched him.
"And to think you were heckling Annie and Brady because they were doing the same thing-"
"Kenny." Bucky said giving her a look and she couldn't help but chuckle softly.
"I punch sometimes in my sleep." she muttered.
"You can punch me whenever you need."
"Bucky." He let out a small chuckle.
"C'mon." he said softly, nodding his head towards his bunk. It was at least 10 degrees colder when she pulled from his embrace and they slowly trekked over to his bunk. She glanced at him and his tall form beside her and he nodded her on encouragingly. She pulled herself up into the bunk and rolled to the wall-side before shifting a bit and turning her head towards him, watching as he sat down and settled down inside the bunk beside her. He made a quick move of laying the blanket over them, keeping the few inches between them, very much a present and existing thing.
"Get some sleep, Kenny." Bucky whispered softly this time. She was staring up at the wooden ceiling of the bunk above her again and could feel her heart beginning to race. His body heat next to her was a help - with the wall on her other side. She felt comfortably cocooned in for the first time, knowing if the Germans were to come in, Bucky was right there.
Kennedy slowly shifted her head to the right and looked towards Bucky again and found him wide-awake, staring at the ceiling of the bunk above them, too. She couldn't help it. She rolled onto her side and then shifted closer towards him, causing his eyes to meet hers again.
That silent stare down lasted for a solid minute, before she pressed her body up against his side and wrapped her arms around herself before pressing her face against his arm and letting out a sigh, his warmth infiltrating her body and making her feel at peace for once.
And to say it didn't take long for his own arm to lift up and pull her closer, as she quickly snuggled in at his presence wrapped around her body, his touch firm, but gentle, was an understatement.
"Someone likes to cuddle." he whispered to her. She grinned against his ribcage, before sniffling.
"Shut up." she whispered back. He chuckled back.
She could finally breathe.
#the ANGSTTTT#going back to my roots#listen i love a light-hearted piece as much as anyone but#angst is where i truly feel my brain kick in#LMAOOOOO#angst or hurt/comfort or both#it really butters my roll ya know?#kennedy x bucky#kennedy farley#bucky egan#john egan#john egan x oc#silver bullets#masters of the air#mota#mota writings#also....#annie x brady#annie bradshaw hehe#ANNIE U ARE TOO GOOD MY GIRL TOO GOOD!!!!! we all need an annie in our lives <3#kennedy here just really hits me#i myself in her in many ways i wont lie#just wanting to be strong for the ones around her#breaking down when night finally dawns#yeah - that hits me deep and kennedy u beautiful girl deserve only the best#bucky here was a perfect counterpart to this entire spiral of these '15 minutes of hell' that kennedy talks about#brb emotional about these more than anything#kennedy is also so the archer by ts coded send tweet#SOBBING THEM
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Did someone say more buff Virgil hcs? No? Too bad!!
Remus has definitely handed him melons and stuff and begged Virgil to crush them in various ways
"Bench press me!!" "Why?" "Because it's hot!!"
Despite being capable of crushing skulls and bones, Virgil is capable of being the most gentle guy in the world
Remus has broken bone? Virgil can pinpoint the break without causing much pain
The first time anyone other than Remus figured out that Virgil was ripped was when Roman was trying to get his measurements.
He didn't realize that Virgil was with his brother at the time. He absolutely flirted like crazy because he has some taste
that's the only day Roman learned his brother scored a total hunk
Remus is no weakling by any extent, but he will pretend to need help with lifting things just to see his man in action
Remus is pleasantly surprised every time Virgil scoops him up because he's not a skinny dude (chubby Remus hcs coming soon)
One time Patton accidentally shrank his shirts in the wash (or Janus did it on purpose) Virgil was upset that he kept tearing them when he moved. Remus was not at all
Virgil produces more body heat than anyone else. Remus takes advantage of that with his cuddles.
When they're cuddling and Virgil is either bummed or distant, Remus has no problem squeezing his pec and then telling him they should go bra shopping. His ramblings snap Virgil out of it
Virgil once woke up to Remus doing laundry on his abs. He was dehydrated and being in a tub didn't help
Fuck yeah more Beefcake Vee >:}D!!! Of course Ree's not gonna stop drooling over his B U F F Emo's bod and purposely puts those guns to the test to fuel his Gay thoughts but the Spider's shrunken clothes only fuels it even more by letting him imagine his Emo ripping his shirts Hulk Hogan style to free those Anxietitties XD (The chaotic Duke can and will purposely spill water on him if it means that shirt is coming off XD)
#also i fucking L O V E vee being warm it's the reason why ree loves winter so much <3#dukexiety#remus sanders#virgil sanders#roman sanders#patton sanders#janus sanders#ts remus#ts virgil#ts roman#ts patton#ts janus#sanders sides#thomas sanders#asks#answers#brandstifter-sys#not a countdown
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sidestober day 22: screenshot redraw
logan as dr. finklenstein? genius
#i loved the new asides so much!!! silly song silly scenario silly costumes#sanders sides#logan sanders#sanders sides fanart#ts logan#logan sanders fanart#digital art#my art#illustration#i never draw logan so this video was perfect inspiration- i had to draw him at least once for this challenge!#also i got lazy and didnt draw the background- sue me jkdhskds
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2023 CHARACTER WRAPPED top 9 characters I loved in 2023
tagged by @difanghua @cowtiekento @edwards-teach — thank you for the tag hanyi, malina, and elio ♡
I only chose my faves from shows I watched this year, otherwise the list would be endless ^^'
tagging: (no pressure!) @kanbayashis @misakarose @icythot-bakubitch @evakant @mx-sinisters @ashiromina @milaghoul @sugaaz @userfrieren @usernanami @peskyfirefly @karura @taz-skylar @luffys @queenrojpag @himawaari @koushuwu @smol-ackerman + anyone else who wants to!
characters + honorable mentions under the cut
violet evergarden (violet evergarden)
shirosaki yuusei (atarashii joushi wa dotennen)
suwa rei (buddy daddies)
william james moriarty (yuukoku no moriarty)
vash the stampede (trigun stampede)
mu qing (tian guan ci fu)
mukouda tsuyoshi (tondemo skill de isekai hourou meshi)
iwakura mitsumi (skip to loafer)
yato (noragami)
honorable mentions: kim dokja (omniscient reader's viewpoint), lu guang (shiguang dailiren), katsuki yuuri (yuuri on ice), jiang cheng (mo dao zu shi), ryu hwa (myoryeongui hwangja), lloyd frontera (yeokdaegeum yeongji seolgyesa)
#*gifs#this was so much fun!!#SO HARD TO CHOOSE THO#it physically pained me not to include my main blorbos ;A;#they're from previous years so they didn't fit the criteria#so off to honorable mentions they go#i wanted to showcase my newer faves tho!! 2023 truly was a godsend for blorbos#here's hoping 2024 brings many more :3#also jiang cheng beloved !!! i would've loved to include u but i've only watched the live action so it would've been the odd one out#and a couple of honorable mentions to my faves from manhwas too <33#also why did i choose scenes that were so hard to color.......#ask games for ts
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it took way too long but I am so so glad I finally found out about ts!underswap because my main complaint with undertale swap AUs was that they always swapped everything to the point of basically just being reskins of the original characters and not doing anything interesting with the concept of role-switching, so to see a swap fangame that keeps the characters’ original personalities which actually changes how they work in the role they’ve been swapped into is basically everything I ever wanted from a swap AU
#sans as a small town superhero/vigilante is so so so much more interesting than just#sans but he’s actually papyrus#papyrus being his energetic cheerleader is so fitting for a swap. and also it’s just sweet#I love you crossbones ts underswap#undertale#ts underswap
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ONE GOOD METTACRIT DRAWING
MULTIPLE BAD VARIOUS GUYS DRAWINGS
GO PLAY TS!UNDERSWAP NOOOOOOWWWWWW
#undertale#my art#mettacrit#burgerpants#chara#undertale au#ts!underswap#I LOVE THIS FANGAME SO MUCH ITS SO GOOD#the journal that chara gets is so silly every time i walk three steps i check the journal again the crayon drawings are so good#mettacrit is also so cool i want to put him in a blender 😔😔#ok that's all goodnight my beautiful gamer army
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