#Also Bart's like 19 here
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I keep forgetting how MASSIVE Bart's dad is
Gatdamunit
Also lookit bby Bart when he still had his tail mybbyboy
#Bartemus Bagiery#bart the bard#Mordren Malbus#unseelie fae#sidhe fae#like seriously Mordren was HUGE because he got UP there in age unlike a lot of his predecessors#Also Bart's like 19 here#just a baby#and full of anxiety and general angst lmao#highlord#fae#tales of alor#tablet doodle
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I have a prompt for you, in light of the recent (very entertaining) DCU aus you've posted. If you were going to do a batfam-are-cryptids-but-now-the-justice-leauge-meets-them thing, how would you do it?
Have I told you thank you yet, @somestorythoughts, your prompts and responses make me so happy. Also I almost always end up with more to write, which is fun.
Now back to the important part.
Fair warning, I screw with ages and timelines with this one. There is no canon here
I think, as far as a cryptid status is concerned this will be a ‘Batman is a founding, and funding, member of the Justice League, but has never revealed his identity’ kind of idea (with all the precautions therein to make sure even the metas can’t guess his identity). There is some speculation throughout the Justice League that Batman does not actually have a civilian identity, that he is the spirit of justice possessing a cape and cowl (Seriously there were three attempted exorcisms). It is known that Batman always works alone, and that no one is to set foot Gotham, a few of the youngest members disbelieve that Gotham even really exists.
However there are always rumors that can’t quite be dispelled. No one in the Justice League can figure out the Watchtower’s firewall (designed by Oracle). Through the years there have been half heard conversations by the JL that almost sound like a wellness check after a fight, going either direction over a com line they can’t access. Sometimes during particularly difficult fights masked strangers will appear, most of which fight with styles similar to Batman, only to vanish again without a word. A few swear they have caught code names (Robin…or maybe Red Robin…Or was it Red Hood…no it was really Black Bat…there might be a BatGirl????) but no one can confirm anything.
In addition, it is impossible to quell the rumor that entering Gotham uninvited means you will disappear. Not every time and no one can figure out the difference between being escorted out and vanishing, but there have been several heroes from the community who vanished after entering Gotham over the years.
What’s really happening is that I love the Young Justice Team and want a way for it to work with Cryptid BatFam.
Two of the most notable, the first but certainly not the last, were Bart Allen, Impulse, and Cassie Sandsmark, Wonder Girl who entered the city limits together to try to prove that they too could be heroes. Both were 15 when they vanished. Unknown to anyone else, at the same time an unnamed clone of Clark Kent and Lex Luthor was also sent into Gotham, as a test of some kind.
All three of them, for different reasons, entered feeling abandoned or dismissed by the people around them. So when they encountered Tim Drake, as Robin, age 14; he called dibs and adopted them on the spot (Tim: These are my children Cassie, Bart, and the newly named Connor. Yes, I carried them in my very own womb and I am very proud of all of them. No, I will not accept questions. Batkids: Cool! Niblings. Batman<sighs>: At least tell me you didn’t kill someone to acquire them. Tim: I just told you, I birthed them myself). So Cassie, Bart, and Connor are absorbed into the BatFam. Both Bart and Cassie decide against telling anyone where they are, with Connor not really having anyone to tell. It should also be noted that the JL avoided asking Batman about the whereabouts of the kids who vanished after entering Gotham, they didn’t want to admit where the kids had gone.
Three years later, Jason, as Red Hood (Jason did not die here, though it was close. He still took on the moniker of Red Hood after a beating by the Joker), age 19 happens upon Roy Harper, age 20 after Roy had a fight with Oliver and does the same thing. Only Jason dragged Roy home and introduced Roy home as his newest brother, giving Bruce a crazy look that said under no uncertain terms that Bruce better break out the adoption papers immediately; never mind that Roy was not underage.
At the same time Raven, originally 26, was de aged to about 8 due to an attempted possession by her father, accidentally portals into Gotham and practically climbs Dick Grayson,age 22, in fear. The effects of the spell and the portal wiped her memories past her physical age. So now Dick has a daughter as well, who he thinks is a Gothamite since he never saw the portal. As far as anyone from Justice League Dark can tell there was a portal leading to Gotham where Raven disappeared but no one knows what happened (Batman and his family are looking for an adult Raven and never connected her to the 8 year old Rachel that became Dick’s daughter).
Others also disappear, having been adopted by the Waynes
What I am saying is that Gotham is considered quite a bit more dangerous to the caped community and the Batfam encompasses a few people it might not have otherwise. I think it would be funnier if Batman was not aware of his family's cryptid status (It never occurs to him that his kids have never been invited to join any of the younger generation teams).
Something sparks a partial return of Raven’s, now around 14 or 15, memory, enough for Rachel (who is the current Robin) to realize she is Raven. At her request, Batman announces this at a meeting and her intention to remain Dick’s daughter and Bruce’s granddaughter. The JL react confusingly (they are all losing their collective minds at the thought that Batman has kids AND grandkids). His response that one of his sons made him a grandfather when the boy was 14 does not inspire confidence. Eventually, and I do mean this takes ages, it leads to the entire Batfam coming up to the Watchtower. In spite of the masks Barry recognizes Bart, and after a moment the Wonder’s also recognize Cassie. Both had been desperately missed (the feelings of abandonment had been a misunderstanding). Though the Wonder’s and the Speedsters both try to hug their missing members, it becomes clear that you can pry them from their mother, Tim, introduced as Red Robin, only when Red Robin is dead.
The Speedsters look at each other, shrug, and immediately start lobbying Red Robin for Visitation (it does not matter that Tim’s kids are all adults with their own lives in Gotham). The Wonders do not have a chance to do the same as Connor, code name Agent C (he decided he did not want to be a field Vigilante, instead he has taken on a support role, like Alfred, where he is their Mechanic/Mechanical Engineer), drops the bomb that he is a Clone of Superman and Lex Luthor (Connor had not been told enough by the scientists at CADMUS to know what was going on, or even if Lex was aware his DNA was being used but of course the Bats did a DNA, he didn’t even know what the lab was called or where to find it).
Superman does make the connection to CADMUS labs, which he had shut down a few years earlier-though he never put those reports in the Watchtower computers as he considered it an internal matter (Batman would like it noted that all of the Batfam reports end up in the watchtower computer and is irritated that the other heroes do not do the same).
Connor had been the only ‘viable’ clone but all the records (whether viable or not) had been stamped with ‘failure’, so Superman had not known that there should be a clone of him out there somewhere. Also the intervening years of being able to process, ‘hey this person I knew, and was once friends with, stole my genetic material to try and create a new person without my consent or knowledge’ without having to deal with the results of said actions (Compounded by the guilt of not being able to look at this miniature version of himself without making the connection to his enemy Lex and his violation, knowing intellectually that it was not Connors fault for being created or that Connor was created specifically to be a weapon against Superman, but still not able move on emotionally, not enough to be responsible for a child) added to the fact that it is pretty clear that Superman does not need to be responsible for Connor means that superman can verify that Connor is happy where he is, which he is. Then Superman can, with a clear conscience-since Batman is undeniably paranoid enough to have a plan if Connor becomes a villain or an actual problem, offer to help with unexpected powers and have Connor meet the rest of his family.
So Red Robin is simultaneously mediating the reunion between his three children and their other families, all the while ready to take down a Cape that breathes wrong in their direction.
Red Hood, sans helmet but with a mask, is creatively and rhythmically cursing Green Arrow out on behalf of Roy (I want you to picture a Red Hood that practices and excels in the art of Flyting). Green Arrow had made an immediate, and poorly phrased, inquiry into Roy sobriety. Roy has been sober for almost 3 years.
Damian, codename Firebird, is critiquing several of the last major fights and their fighters while having a discussion about blades and underwater fighting with the Aqua family. He is also keeping a protective eye on Nightwing and Robin, who are facing off against JLD (who would like to see if what happened to Raven is reversible-mostly to make sure she is healthy and whatever happened is stable, Nightwing and Robin are taking it to mean they want Raven back instead of Robin).
Steph as Spoiler, Cass as Black Bat, and Duke as Orphan are explaining to a largely horrified audience of former Titans the complicated legacy of the Batman, Robin, and Batgirl names in Gotham (The current Batgirl, Helen Wayne-12 year old daughter of Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne- is standing with Bruce and Alfred-mask firmly in place. She is new to the name and this is her first mission outside of Gotham). It is at this point that the Justice League finds out that there are a number of times when the Batman they dealt with was NOT the same person. Someone also brings up the rumor that Batman is actually a haunted piece of clothing, to the entire BatFams bemusement.
At no point during this process does anyone in the Batfam reveal their civilian identities (save the ones that are now known, like Bart, Cassie, and Roy). They also do not admit to the fact that every single one of them steals and impersonates each other frequently (Tim holds the honor of having patrolled, handled an Arkham breakout, and met with someone outside of Gotham, and handled a world wide invasion in every vigilante identity from Gotham successfully).
It also should be noted that this does not provide clarity to the Justice League about any topic regarding Gotham or its vigilantes.
#i love to answer questions#and prompts#batman#batfamily#batfam#the justice league#dc universe#The Batfam are cryptids#No Canon#bruce wayne#Tim Drake#Jason Todd#jason todd lived#bart allen#cassie sandsmark#kon el kent#Tim Adopts Young Justice#the Justice League is so confused
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Sherlock & Co - Mailbag Episode 4 Transcript
00:00-00:29 *Intro Music*
00:28 John: Hello there, Mister Flatmate.
00:31 Sherlock (Resigned): What is it and why have you got your laptop?
00:34 John: It’s that time! My fine fellow-
00:34 Sherlock: For goodness sake. *sounds of him moving on furniture*
00:36 John: Oi, where you going?
00:38 Sherlock: I’m getting my cushion.
00:39 John: Your cushion?
00:40 Sherlock: Yes. Here. This one.
00:42 John: That- that’s Mariana’s.
00:45 Sherlock: Ah, it’s mine.
00:46 John: I know it’s her’s. I bought it for her for Christmas.
00:50 Sherlock: Are you sure?
00:51 John: Yes, because you don’t support Real Sociedad and she does.
00:56 Sherlock: *pause* I could.
00:57 John: Yeah, you could, but you don’t. Ok- *gibbers* It doesn’t matter. Just sit on the bloody cushion. Fine. Qs! And indeed As! Here we go. Uh, ahem, mm, just a disclaimer here, to the patrons. Um. I’m old. Uh, I’m thirty-four. If-if I see a question in the Discord, I-I just ask it. Uh, if it’s in the wrong order or i-if I’ve missed some out. It’s-it’s probably just me not seeing it. So, y’know. Right-o! Uh-Ooo! Off to a flyer here! Milque asks, “Favorite tube line?”
01:29 Sherlock: Victoria.
01:30 Yeah, Victoria. Yeah, yeah. Generally, most Londoners will give that answer. Umm, y’know clean trains, not too many stops, and some big stations on there. Y’know King’s Cross, Euston, Oxford Circus, um Victoria, obviously. Um, some other lines worth mention: Bakerloo brings a certain vibe. B-bit of a sort of kooky, deranged, but pleasant elderly uncle that doesn’t wash kind of vibe. Uh, central line is possibly the most hated, ah, especially during the summer. Um, Piccadilly gets a lot of people headed to Heathrow, so it comes with a lot of baggage. Hah! Literally clambering over suitcases on that one. The Elizabeth line is amazing, but seems to be closed or delayed most of the time. Um, so thanks for listening to TubeCast!
02:20 John: Heh, right. Next question! SaraHawke722 asks, “How do you both know Stamford?” Stamo! The Stamster! I think therefore I Stam. Heh, uh, I-I added those bits. They didn’t say that. Uh, right. Sherlock you go first.
02:36 Sherlock: I met him at St. Bart’s.
02:39 John: That’s uh Saint Bartholemew’s Hospital in London
02:42 Sherlock: I know.
02:43 John: Yes, I know, I’m just telling the listener.
02:45 Sherlock: *pause* Right… I met him at St. Bart’s. There was a study on skin grafting that he was undertaking. I initially made a number of enquiries about the study, he then hired me to work with him on it. Then after that he wanted me on other projects that I didn’t find that interesting, but *with emphasis* he did let me use the lab.
03:03 John: Great, uh ok, um, I met Stamo in Freshes week at University. Um, the University of London. W-which is kind of affiliated with UCL and King’s College London.
03:15 Sherlock: By kind of affiliated, you mean it’s for their underachieving undergrads.
03:19 John: Uh, sorry mate, what University did you go to, exactly? *silence* Yeah, right, thought so. Uh, by the way, um, few of our American listeners have mentioned that you and Victor went to college together. College in the UK is sixteen to eighteen, generally speaking. Um, but, sorry Sherlock, posh lads will sometimes call boarding school a ‘college’. Uhh, I d-I don’t know why. They also call their private boarding schools ‘public schools’. So, yeah, I know. Weird lot. Uh, anyway, yeah, met Stamo at University of London in Freshes week, we both liked football. He’s a Villa fan, Aston Villa that is. We, we kinda were, uh, both out of our depth a little bit with medical degree life, so y’know maybe stuck together. Which. Which was stupid really as you should probably attach yourself to some smartarse, but hey! Y’know! Live and learn! Uh, he started to do well at Uni. Um, he went on to y’know big-big private practice and cosmetic surgery for the most part. And I got shot at for a living, so. Yeah. Listen in school, kids. Listen in school. Uh, WeirdScience asks “Do you believe in ghosts?”
04:32 Sherlock: No. Do you?
04:33 John: Uh, no. No, no. Joff asks “Sorry to be intrusive doctor, but did you suffer any hearing loss during your army days?” Pardon? *wheezing laugh* Ha, uhh no. No, seriously, I did. Um, I burst an ear drum, twice, um, actually, in Afghanistan. I-in my right ear. Uh, thought it was fine, but then after Ukraine when I was getting a full body M.O.T. as it were, there were signs of hearing loss. Um, yeah, but I’ve been lucky I think. I hope it doesn’t get worse as I’ve built my career in audio now. So. Yeah-yeah, but uh a little. A little bit. Um, JellyBaby says, “Dogs or Cats, podboys?”
05:18 Sherlock: I prefer vermin.
05:19 John: Hm. I uh prefer dogs, through and through. Yeah. Um, y’know I like a cat, but they don’t get me. Dogs get me. Ain’t that right, Arch? Heh. Uh, don’t know where he is actually. He’s probably downstairs with Mariana. Catonk asks, “What’s your favorite musical?” We-well it won’t be ‘Cats’! Hahaha! Ahh, Sherlock, your favorite musical?
05:43 Sherlock: What’s the one with the man?
05:46 John: The. The one with the man. Um. Right. You’ve just described the entirety of art and media there.
05:54 Sherlock: He has a piano and he lives in a cave.
05:57 John: Piano in a cave?
05:59 Sherlock: There’s a girl he loves. He-he-he’s got half a face.
06:01 John: Ohh! Phantom of the Opera.
06:04 Sherlock: Yes! I thought that one was okay.
06:07: Great. Yeah, no, it’s a good’un, it’s a good’un. Good answer, I like Phantom. I like Les Mis. I know that’s a boring answer, but some incredible songs in that. Uhhh, yeah. Question via email here from Sartori, “Did you feel bad for Violet Caruthers, because I did.” Um, well yeah, I did. Um. She, uh- I-I-I don’t know how to put it, really-
06:34 Sherlock (interjecting): Had given up control of her life.
06:36 John: Yeah, it was- I don’t know- confidence shot to shit? Th-th-the truest sort of victim I think I’ve ever seen, really. She just, uh, she couldn’t grasp the wheel on her own life. Like Sherlock says. Was that why you were reluctant on that case, Sherlock?
06:55 Sherlock: Very much so. Men had muscled in and filled the gaps she had created from her own insecurity. I didn’t wish to be yet another imposing presence.
07:05 John: But we were.
07:07 Sherlock: We were. And what good did it do?
07:10 John: Saved a bloke’s life?
07:11 Sherlock: Mm, we didn’t pull the trigger but we may as well have. And we set the process in motion.
07:18 John: Welllll… right. Yeah. Okay, didn’t think this q and a session would get so deep. Um. But, yeah, t-that, uh… Welcome to True Crime! *awkward huff laugh* Yeah, we don’t always run off or cycle off into the sunset. Um. Yeah. Uh, okay. Mush-Pit asks, “How many languages do you know?”
07:47 Sherlock: Many.
07:48 John: Great.Uh, why?
07:50 Sherlock: When I was young, I often fooled myself into thinking perhaps it was my grasp of language that was the reason that I didn’t quite fit in. So, I decided to try a number of other languages to see if they worked as a better and more effective means of communication. I wondered whether the nuance and subtle signals of the English language were what was holding me back from social environments. So, I attempted other languages.
08:14 John: Right, and how did that go?
08:15 Sherlock: It’s the same. It would appear it’s nothing to do with language.
08:20 John: Yeah, I’m inclined to agree with you there. I’m rubbish with languages. Ha, it never sticks for some reason. Um, hole in my brain I think. Mariana is also a dab hand at the old languages. She cracked open a bit of Russian the other day. I nearly ducked for cover! * laughs at his own joke* Uh, *clears through* RangerPip asks, “Have you seen any of the fan content Sherlock?”
08:42 Sherlock: Yes, because you keep showing me. And sticking things on the fridge.
08:46 John: Uh, yeah because they’re cool. They’re really good mate! Just-just you wait until I show you the presentation.
08:52 Sherlock: The what?
08:53 John: Nothing. Right question via email from Unbelted, “Does the fingerprint in your logo make an ‘S’ and is that deliberate?” Yes, um is the answer to that. My idea, thanks. Uh, Jones asks, “What’s our spice tolerance?” So, um, right. Okay, yeah. I can go really spicy for Indian. Uh, I can hit the searing temperatures of the Madras and the Vindaloo no problem. Lot of Brits can actually. But I tell you what, Indonesian and Thai spicing I feel. Geez, whew, that is-is a whole different realm of spice. Um…phew. S-sherlock?
09:32 Sherlock: I like the sensation.
09:35 John. Yep, uh. Anything else to add?
09:39 Sherlock: It depends on my emotional connection to the food.
09:42 John: Of course, of course. Well, a-a-as mentioned in Gloria Scott, Sherlock will only eat certain foods if he’s in the right mood. The mood for food, heh. Uh, right-o. Few general questions asking how pancake day went. Uh, yep. No dramas. Went well. Went ‘flipping’ great. Eh? Hehe. Uh, yeah, uh oo! Questions and comments. A lot from North American Podpals, uh, about me describing a woman as ‘tasty’. Um. So, ‘tasty’ is a Carol Watson word. Uh. T-t-the sort she would use for young, handsome men that she flirts with when she can. Um, don’t know what the American equivalent would be? Um? Yeah, you know, what’s a lame word used to describe someone as good looking? Y’know what would an elderly woman use basically…get in touch! Right, another question here. Uh, by the way, when I started this whole question and answer thing, Goalhanger and I thought this would be a great way to field questions about cases. Um. Y’know about the people we meet, about the nature of the crimes we’ve dealt with, uh to fill in possible knowledge gaps, and impart little gems of information that expose the murky nature of crime. Um. Which takes us to this question from Saphhster, “John, what are your thoughts on ranch dressing?” *long pause* I mean, yeah. I like it. I like it, it’s good stuff. Um, Sherlock is nodding. Uh, it’s audio mate. Great. Thanks for your contribution. Uh, Tonky asks, “Does Sherlock have any tattoos?” Apart from my face on his bum. Heh, that’s a joke. That’s a joke, don’t write in. Sherlock, tattoos?
11:26 Sherlock: A spiral on my hip.
11:28 John: What?! Alright, well let’s see! Get it out. *sound of clothes being moved/removed* Oh, well that’s rubbish.
11:34 Sherlock: I know.
11:35 John: Why’d you get that done?
11:36 Sherlock: I-it’s scarring from falling out of bed. I had it filled in because it looked like a spiral.
11:42 John: Okay. Sarah Hawke again with a question, “What is your advice about dealing with a noisy flatmate? Would love both your takes on this lol. I’m at Uni and have a noisy and slightly annoying flatmate. Somehow I’ve agreed to live with them next year as well.” Um, okay Sara Hawke, w-
12:03 Sherlock (cutting John off): Try to tune them out as best you can. Bring in other elements to distract you from their noisiness.
12:09 John (cutting Sherlock off): Sorry, what are you doing?
12:10 Sherlock: Answering wonky-blonk’s question.
12:12 John: It’s not ‘Wonky-Blonk’, it’s Sarah Hawke. Who’s Wonky-Blonk?
12:15 Sherlock: They’re all called that.
12:17 John: Look, I live with a noisy flatmate, alright, it’s clearly directed at me.
12:20 Sherlock: They said both of us.
12:21 John: Yeah, but they added a ‘lol’, okay. That means they recognize the irony of you being asked.
12:26 Sherlock: Why?
12:27 John: Because you initiate a fucking marching band at three am every night. Ssssake. Uh, yeah, Sarah Hawke, I would say get some earbuds. Play music. Uh, white noise is good. Um, oh, I l-looked into this. You can get quite cool soundproofing panels on Amazon. Um, they don’t look awful and they do kind of work. Sometimes. Uh, yeah, right, anyway. That’s it. Thanks for the ‘Qs’, hope you liked the ‘As’ and we will see you soon. He’s wav-He’s waving. It’s. It’s audio m- For god’s sake-
13:00-13:30 *Outro Music Plays*
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#sherlock holmes#john watson#sherlock and john#transcript#transcripts#goalhanger podcasts#my transcript
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Bring Me Home Arc 2 Part 19
This brings the total word count for arc 2 over 31k words. But it also brings us nearly to the end of the arc! There'll likely only be one more part after this which I hope to have out next week (but my first nephew is going to be born any day now, so no promises).
Story Summary: Tim and Danny are both neglected by parents who care more about their work than their families. They deal with this by spending too much time online and find each other playing MMORPGs. They keep up their friendship as Tim becomes Robin and Danny becomes Phantom and don't bother keeping secrets from each other.
Find Arc 1 Here
Arc 2: Part 1, Previous
Word Count: 1.3k
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Rob: get back here now Rob: All 4 of us are needed
Before he even finished typing his last message, Bart was at his side. Just in time to see Danny mutter something and shoot an ectoblast at his parents who were thrown back with the force of it, destroying the podium and leaving a burn mark on the ground. People immediately began panicking.
“Shit,” muttered Tim. “Cassie, let’s go. Impulse, try to help where you can.”
“You’ve got it.” Bart gave them the bag that held their uniforms and rushed towards Danny.
Cassie and Tim joined the fleeing crowds, but slipped down the hall rather than outside in search of somewhere to change. Unfortunately, the first bathroom they passed had a camera pointing at the door. But a short way down, they found a janitor’s closet that didn’t.
“Not glamorous, I’m afraid,” said Tim.
Cassie laughed. “We’ve used worse.”
“True enough.”
Bart kept texting updates to Tim’s relief.
Imp: They’re in the basement Imp: Walker is confirmed possessing the mayor Imp: SB with me
As soon as the messages came through, Tim was hacking into city records to find the blue prints for the building.
“Come on, Rob,” said Cassie. “We need to get going.”
“Just finding the best way to the basement!” said Tim. A few more clicks and he had it. “Got it, let’s go.”
“Fucking finally.” Cassie cracked the door open and peered outside before throwing it open.
“Go right!” called Tim.
He overtook her and led her to a door. It was the matter of seconds to pick the lock and, rather than wait for him, Cassie just picked him up and flew him down the flight of stairs.
They burst out into what was clearly a service area. Ahead, they could hear the sounds of fighting. Cassie continued to fly them forward when they ran into Superboy.
“Superboy!” called Tim.
One of Danny’s classmates, Paulina, came running around the corner and Conner held up a blaster. “Stay back!” he called.
She screeched and held her hands up. Behind her came Dash, face contorted into a growl. The girl looked between Conner and Dash and screamed again.
“Kon!” called Tim, “Focus on Dash. I don’t think she’s overshadowed!”
Cassie set him down next to Conner and shouted, “I’m going to look for Phantom and Impulse!”
Conner shot at Dash and Tim assembled his Fenton Rod. To Paulina, he said, “Hey, sorry about that. We thought you might still be overshadowed. I’m Robin and we can get you out of here.”
“Don’t get near me!” she yelled at him. “Dash! Are you okay?”
The ghost had been expelled from him and he was sitting on the ground rubbing his head. “Paulina? Where are we?”
Tim pulled out a thermos and sucked in the ghost. “You’re in the basement of the City Hall building. Stairs are that way—” he pointed “—go up them and take a left.”
Paulina rushed to Dash’s side and pulled him up. With one last glare at Tim and Conner, she led him towards the stairs.
Tim let her go without arguing.
Instead, Tim and Conner ran towards the sound of fighting, only to see Maddie crouched behind some pipes with a bazooka pointed right at Danny.
With a curse, Conner flew towards her, yanking the weapon out of her hands. Tim was just a few paces behind him, and when Maddie drew another weapon poised to attack Conner, Tim used his staff to knock it from her hand.
“So you have been brainwashed by the ghosts,” she spat the last word. “Well I won’t let you win.” She kicked at his head and Tim ducked, using the motion to attempt to swipe at her other leg with his staff.
But she jumped over the attack and Tim had to roll out of the way of her downward kick.
“You’re quite good,” he commented.
“I’m a ninth degree black belt,” she said as she used the distance she’d gained to pull out a tube of lipstick. With a twist, she shot a laser at him.
“Creative, too, I see.”
Tim glanced over at the others to see Wulf had reappeared and was helping them. Unfortunately, though, Maddie was good enough that he had to keep most of his focus on her. She shot another laser and Tim used his staff to vault over it and close the distance between them.
“Look,��� he said, “You don’t understand. Phantom is trying to stop the invasion.”
“He’s lying to you. All ghosts only want to hurt humans.”
Tim swung his staff and Maddie twisted out of the way. He still managed to graze her side and she let out a grunt of pain. He shifted his position so he could see his friends more clearly.
Only to watch the Mayor grab hold of Danny and fly him up through the ceiling. Two ectoblasts hit the area just after they disappeared. Wulf followed them through the ceiling and Bart ran off at the same time.
He was distracted enough that Maddie managed to kick him hard on the side. Tim let out a grunt of pain and tried to catch his breath. Before she could land a second attack, Conner was there restraining her.
“Thanks,” said Tim.
“Anytime. Sorry I wasn’t able to help sooner.”
Tim waved the apology off as he grabbed some zip-ties from his utility belt. “We’re both trying to help the people of Amity,” he told Maddie as he retrained her ankles and wrists.
“If you’re working with the ghosts, you’re only going to hurt them.”
Conner didn’t try to hold back his snort. “If you could see past your own prejudices, you’d see how fucking wrong you are. Especially about Phantom.”
“Superboy, take this”—Tim handed over a thermos—“go see if you can help Phantom. Wondergirl and I will make sure no one else’s hiding down here.”
They had barely started their search when Danny sunk back down into the basement with Bart and Conner in tow. Wulf followed them.
The sight of them had Maddie cursing up a storm again and Phantom sighed. “Ma��am, everyone is fine. I made sure of it. Here, I’ll take you upstairs where Da— uh, Jack is and you’ll see.”
“Phantom,” started Tim, but he had no idea what else to say. He just knew he didn’t want Danny anywhere near his parents while in his ghost form.
But Danny waved him off, picked up his mom, and flew them up through the ceiling again. Less than a minute later, he was back down.
“You know, she’d ground me for using even half of those words,” he said with a smile. No one laughed and Danny sighed. “So today was a disaster.”
“What did Walker do?” asked Tim.
Danny buried his face in his hands and groaned.
Bart ended up being the one to explain. “He held Danny to him and pretended Danny was kidnapping him in front of all the people outside City Hall.”
Tim closed his eyes and tilted his head back. “Shit,” he breathed out. “Disaster is right.”
Danny let out a slightly hysterical laugh. “At least Paulina now thinks I’m a good guy.”
“She does?” asked Conner. “She ran from Rob and I.”
Danny squared his shoulders and imitated slicking his hair back. “Guess it’s just my natural charisma.”
Tim laughed, but it was short lived. “I seem to have made things worse for you.”
Danny bumped their shoulders. “And I don’t doubt it would’ve been just as bad, if not worse, without you. Thanks for trying.”
“We shouldn’t linger here,” said Bart. “What if Maddie comes back?”
Danny sighed and pulled out his phone. “My sister will be looking for me, I’m sure. Let’s reconvene at the park in, like, an hour?”
“We’ll bring food!” offered Bart.
Tim pulled Danny into a hug. “See you then. We’ll figure this out.”
Danny just sighed. “I hope so.”
-----
Next
And that's the end of the action! Hope you enjoyed. Once this arc is finished, I'll probably take a hiatus to get this fixed up, Arc 1 of Ghost!Robin fixed up, and the Bad Reveal AU finished. I want all of those finished and up on AO3 before Christmas if I can manage it.
I no longer do tag lists for this fic, but please check out the Subscription Post if you want to be notified of updates.
#dpxdc#my writing#bring me home#at least all the ghosts are taken care of?#and wulf wasn't sucked back into the ghost zone with walker this time#though now amity doesnt trust the justice league#or ghosts#oops
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20 Simpsons Psychic Predictions That Came True 🚀
Hey there, fellow Simpsons fans! 🎉 If you’ve been following The Simpsons, you know that this iconic show isn’t just about laughs and donuts (though we love those too). It’s also about some eerily accurate predictions that have left us all scratching our heads. 🤔 How did this cartoon get so many things right about the future? Grab a seat, grab a donut 🍩, and let’s dive into some of the wildest psychic predictions from The Simpsons that actually came true! 🚀
🌟🔮✨ Curious about what the future holds for you? Just like The Simpsons predicted some mind-blowing events, you too can uncover what’s in store for your life. Click the link below for your own personal psychic reading and get insights that might just amaze you:
1. Donald Trump’s Presidency 🇺🇸
Season 11, Episode 17 (“Bart to the Future”)
In this episode from the year 2000, Lisa becomes the president and mentions that they inherited quite a budget crunch from President Trump. Fast forward to 2016, and Donald Trump becomes the 45th president of the United States. What the what?! 😲
2. Smartwatches ⌚
Season 6, Episode 19 (“Lisa’s Wedding”)
During a future vision of Lisa’s wedding, her fiancé uses a watch to make a phone call. This was in 1995, way before smartwatches became a thing in the 2010s. Talk about being ahead of the curve! 📱
3. Disney Buys 20th Century Fox 🏰🦊
Season 10, Episode 5 (“When You Dish Upon a Star”)
In 1998, there’s a scene showing the 20th Century Fox sign with a subtitle “A Division of Walt Disney Co.” In 2019, Disney actually bought 21st Century Fox. Coincidence? I think not! 🎬
4. Video Chatting 💻
Season 6, Episode 19 (“Lisa’s Wedding”)
Again in Lisa’s Wedding, we see video calls being made. This was years before Skype, FaceTime, or Zoom became part of our daily lives. The Simpsons were definitely on to something here! 🖥️
5. The Shard in London 🏙️
Season 6, Episode 19 (“Lisa’s Wedding”)
In the same episode (wow, it’s like a crystal ball!), we see a skyline that includes a skyscraper eerily similar to The Shard, which wasn’t built until 2012. 👀
6. Lady Gaga’s Super Bowl Performance 🎤
Season 23, Episode 22 (“Lisa Goes Gaga”)
In 2012, The Simpsons showed Lady Gaga performing at a concert, suspended in the air. Fast forward to 2017, and Gaga did exactly that at the Super Bowl halftime show. Fly, Gaga, fly! 🎇
7. Nobel Prize Winner 🏅
Season 22, Episode 1 (“Elementary School Musical”)
Milhouse predicted that Bengt Holmström would win the Nobel Prize in Economics. And guess what? Holmström did win it in 2016. Way to go, Milhouse! 📊
8. Ebola Outbreak 🌍
Season 9, Episode 3 (“Lisa’s Sax”)
In this 1997 episode, Marge suggests that Bart read a book titled “Curious George and the Ebola Virus.” Years later, in 2014, there was a significant Ebola outbreak. Chills! 😬
9. Siegfried and Roy Tiger Attack 🐅
Season 5, Episode 10 (“$pringfield (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)”)
The show depicted a white tiger attacking entertainers similar to Siegfried and Roy. Tragically, in 2003, Roy was indeed attacked by one of their white tigers during a performance. 😥
10. U.S. Wins Olympic Gold in Curling 🥌
Season 21, Episode 12 (“Boy Meets Curl”)
Homer and Marge compete in curling and win a gold medal. In real life, the U.S. men’s team won the gold medal in curling at the 2018 Winter Olympics. Sweep that, skeptics! 🥇
But wait, there’s more! Let’s keep this prediction train rolling with some honorable mentions that didn’t make the top 10 but are still pretty mind-blowing. 🚂💨
11. Horse Meat Scandal 🐴
Season 5, Episode 19 (“Sweet Seymour Skinner’s Baadasssss Song”)
Lunchlady Doris used “assorted horse parts” in the cafeteria food. In 2013, a scandal erupted in Europe when horse meat was found in various beef products.
12. FIFA Corruption Scandal ⚽
Season 25, Episode 16 (“You Don’t Have to Live Like a Referee”)
The episode features a storyline involving corruption in the World Football Federation. In 2015, several FIFA officials were arrested amid a corruption investigation.
13. Farmville 🚜
Season 9, Episode 12 (“Bart Carny”)
In this 1998 episode, kids are seen excitedly playing a yard work simulator game. Fast forward to the 2000s, and Farmville became a massive hit on Facebook.
14. Faulty Voting Machines 🗳️
Season 20, Episode 4 (“Treehouse of Horror XIX”)
Homer tries to vote for Obama in the 2008 election, but the machine keeps changing his vote to McCain. In 2012, there were real reports of voting machines changing votes.
15. Beats by Dre 🎧
Season 8, Episode 14 (“The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show”)
In a scene from 1997, we see a character wearing what looks like modern-day Beats by Dre headphones, years before they existed.
16. Mutant Tomatoes 🍅
Season 11, Episode 5 (“E-I-E-I-(Annoyed Grunt)”)
Homer grows mutant tomatoes after using nuclear power on his crops. In real life, scientists created genetically modified tomatoes that glow in the dark.
17. NSA Surveillance 🕵️
The Simpsons Movie (2007)
The movie depicted the NSA spying on citizens. In 2013, Edward Snowden revealed that the NSA was indeed conducting mass surveillance on American citizens.
18. Shard Building in London 🏙️
Season 6, Episode 19 (“Lisa’s Wedding”)
We see a tall building in the London skyline that resembles The Shard, which was completed in 2012.
19. Michelangelo’s David Censorship 🗿
Season 2, Episode 9 (“Itchy & Scratchy & Marge”)
The episode shows Springfieldians protesting against Michelangelo’s David being exhibited. In 2016, Russian campaigners did try to cover the statue.
20. Autocorrect Fail 📱
Season 6, Episode 8 (“Lisa on Ice”)
Dolph writes a memo that says “Beat up Martin” which gets autocorrected to “Eat up Martha.” Apple’s iPhone autocorrect has had many such hilarious fails.
It’s wild, right? How does a cartoon get so many things right? Well, it’s probably a mix of clever writing, sharp observation, and maybe a bit of that Springfield magic. ✨
And it's not just us hardcore fans who are intrigued. Thanks to the internet, more and more people are discovering the spooky accuracy of The Simpsons' predictions. Social media platforms are buzzing with theories and speculations. Reddit threads are filled with fans dissecting episodes, and YouTube is packed with videos analyzing every prediction. It's like a virtual treasure hunt where every frame might hold a secret clue to our future! 🔮
Some folks even believe that the writers have a time machine or some sort of psychic ability. While that’s probably a stretch, it’s fun to think about! One thing’s for sure – The Simpsons will keep surprising us with their uncanny knack for predicting the future.
Whether you’re a longtime fan or just curious about the show’s “psychic” tendencies, it’s clear that The Simpsons is more than just a TV show. It’s a pop culture phenomenon that continues to influence and amuse us, while also making us think twice about what might come next. So, next time you’re watching, pay close attention – you might just be getting a sneak peek into the future! 🕵️♂️✨
Stay curious, my friends! And remember, the truth is out there… or maybe just in the next episode of The Simpsons. 🌟🚀
#divination#psychic#tarot reading#free readings#pick a card#pick a pile#free tarot#daily tarot#tarot community#tarotblr#tarot cards#tarot#future spouse#astrology#spirituality#crystals#witchcraft#meditation#manifestation#witchblr#spiritualawakening#mysticism#numerology#occult#wicca#tarot deck#the simpsons
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figured i'd ask you since you're like, The Flash Fam Expert, but do you happen to know the rough ages of the flashfam? like i know irey and jai are nine, ace is somewhere in his late teens, and wally has to be late twenties at the youngest but i can't find many specifics on other characters and wasn't sure if you might be able to help!
OOF. That's a rough one buddy. You don't understand what you have just unleashed upon the world.
God. Alright.
Irey and Jai are nine physically and mentally. Chronologically speaking, they're still toddlers but don't worry about it.
Ace is around 17? Not yet 18 but older than 15. I would bet on 17 but 16 wouldn't be crazy either. Avery is the same age.
Jay and Max are over 100 but by how much, I couldn't tell you. They play their age close to the chest. Physically they look 50-60 though.
Here's where it gets tricky.
Barry, Wally, Jesse and Bart.
So, Wally would've been in his early 30's when his children were born. Definitely by the time Barry came back Wally would've been at least 30.
However, during the N52 reboot everyone got deaged around a decade younger, Wally included. Wally came out of the Speedforce wearing his Kid Flash costume, indicating that he was physically 19 at the oldest. It's been a few years since Wally emerged, so physically he would have to be around 21 at this point.
Wild! I know!
So yeah, Barry would've been... late 30's? Ish? When he died. He came back at roughly the same age and chilled for a bit. He would've had to have hit 40 at least by that point. But speedsters also don't really physically age? So he looked like he was in his early 30's.
The N52 reboot hit, putting Barry at... late 20's- early 30's. I would say, by now, that the man is at least 30. Potentially even 35. But he looks 25 because speedsters don't age. (Iris would be around 30)
Bart is going to be the most wild one here. Alright. I'm speedrunning this one, so if you don't understand what is happening, I'm sorry but it is too late for you.
He exits the time portal at physically 12, ages to 14 before stabilized. He ages to 16 at which point he disappears. He comes back as an adult for a year but is killed. He comes back, again, back at 16 and is allowed to chill for a bit (potentially a year), bringing Bart to 17 years old (physically) when Flashpoint and the N52 reboot hit.
Bart was somehow spared the ~10 year deaging but he wasn't spared the deaging entirely. Bart pops out looking around 12-14 years old again. He runs around for about a year ish, which brings Bart to physically 13-15 years old currently in comics.
HOWEVER, it must be stated that, like Wally and Barry, Bart's mental age has never been reset. His mental age did not reboot with his body, so mentally Bart is around 19-20 years old.
Jesse... Jesse is weird. DC likes to keep Jesse ambiguously young. When in doubt, Jesse is around the same age as Wally. So, currently she would be around 21. The same applies to Linda.
So yeah. It's weird because Barry was a guy in his 30's with a little baby ten year old Wally and there was at least a 20 year age difference there. And now it's maybe 9 years? But also Barry looks 25 because he's a speedster, so it looks like Barry is only 4-5 years older than Wally.
Honestly if you went off looks alone, it'd be Jay (50), Max (50), Barry (25), Wally (21), Jesse (21), Avery (16), Ace (16), Bart (14), Irey (9) and Jai (9). Which is WILD?! Their family looks like two gay dads adopted 8 kids. Other than Max and Jay, they all look within five years of each other. It's wild.
Speedster aging man... They just... don't. They don't age. They live on Neverland time 24/7.
#dc#dc comics#flash fam#flash family#the flash#kid flash#wally west#impulse#bart allen#barry allen#speedsters#jay garrick#max mercury#jesse chambers#jesse quick#irey west#jai west#ace west#avery ho#surge#thunderheart#linda park#iris west#OH ALSO WALLY HAS A CANONICAL 6 ISH YEAR AGE DIFFERENCE WITH ACE#because ten year old Wally coexisted with toddler (3-4?) Ace. so following that. if Ace is 16 then Wally is 22. if 17 then 23
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hi! i read your dc timeline (fantastic job btw) and had trouble following all the titans/teen titans/young justice/outsiders stuff. so i was wondering what's the difference between those four groups/how many iterations of each group there were/who were their members?
Thanks! The differences between these groups is fairly easy to answer. The membership and iterations...not so much. I will first link to my (Teen) Titans reading order, which gives the gist of each era, and my Young Justice reading order (both preboot only).
Like any teams that last more than a few years, all four of those teams have had various iterations with various lineups. At the most basic level:
"Teen Titans" was initially a team of the original sidekicks (think Dick, Donna, Wally, etc), but has since become the default name for DC's current team of young heroes, whoever they may be.
"Titans" is specifically used for teams with that original generation of sidekicks, but now grown up as adults.
"Young Justice" is for the 90s generation of kid heroes (okay, some introduced in the 80s; think Tim, Bart, Cassie, etc), and has really only been used as a name for that group/generation.
And "Outsiders" is actually typically a Batman-led team of fully adult heroes that has the least overlap here--except for one particular iteration of the team in 2003 with young adult heroes, including Dick, Roy, and Kory.
tl;dr: The Titans and Young Justice are based on specific groups, the Teen Titans are any kid heroes, and the Outsiders are mostly irrelevant just with one major exception.
This means that:
Young Justice and the Titans have existed at the same time, one as the teen generation of Tim/Bart/etc, one as the young adult generation of Dick/Donna etc.
The Teen Titans and the Titans have existed at the same time. Though the naming is more confusing here, the idea is the same: the Teen Titans are the teen heroes (typically Tim-generation for this, maybe even younger), and the Titans are the Dick-generation young adults.
In recent years, the Teen Titans and Young Justice have existed at the same time. Young Justice remains the Tim-generation, and the Teen Titans are either an even newer, younger team (think Damian, Crush), or just DC's latest attempt at capitalizing on the famous name (typically with the characters known from the animated show: Raven, Cyborg, etc).
The Outsiders may or may not have existed in conjunction with any number of these, because they usually draw from a whole different set of potential characters.
As for the number of iterations and list of members...Yeah. Putting that under a cut.
A Pre-Flashpoint History
I’m going to thoroughly cover Titans/Teen Titans/Young Justice here, but I will be a lot less detailed on the Outsiders because I don’t know them as well.
The Teen Titans I (60s, 70s) sprang out of a team up between Dick Grayson/Robin, Wally West/Kid Flash, and Garth/Aqualad. The team was officially founded and formed by the fab five: those three, plus Donna Troy/Wonder Girl and Roy Harper/Speedy.
This team would have like a dozen other members at various points over the years, including Lilith Clay, Mal Duncan/Guardian/Herald, and Hank and Don Hall/Hawk and Dove.
They also briefly had a mostly-offscreen spinoff, the Titans West, which included such members as Gar Logan/Beast Boy, Bette Kane/Flamebird, and Hawk and Dove.
The Teen Titan got together in mid adolescence, and had a lot of cheesy adventures against such foes as Mad Mod and Ding Dong Daddy. They broke up when many members starting going off to college or otherwise moving on in life.
The New (Teen) Titans (80s), reassembled by Raven to fight her father, were half a reformation of old members (Dick, Donna, Wally, plus Gar now going by Changeling) and half new members (Raven, Koriand'r/Starfire, Vic Stone/Cyborg). As they were already all 18-19 when the team started--minus youngster Gar--the "Teen" was soon dropped from the name. Wally would end up leaving this team, and others like Joey Wilson/Jericho, Kole, and Danny Chase would join. Former Titans and allies, like Roy and Garth, would periodically show up to help out as well.
This run took a more serious tone and had a lot of character progression. It's when many of the first generation of sidekicks changed identities: Robin to Nightwing, Wonder Girl to Troia and later no codename, Speedy to Arsenal, etc. It also introduced such villains as Slade Wilson/Deathstroke (including the famous Judas Contract story with Terra), HIVE, Brother Blood, and Komand'r/Blackfire.
The original Outsiders I were also formed in the 80s, led by Batman and including iconic members like Black Lightning and Katana.
In the early 90s, the New Titans fell apart for a variety of terrible reasons and had massive shifts in membership. Half of them left or died or were completely changed; others like Leonid Kovar/Red Star, Pantha, and Miriam Delgado/Mirage joined, and the whole thing was a mess.
After a lot of spiraling, the team was almost entirely swapped to a largely new group funded by the government and led by Roy/Arsenal, including Gar, Miriam, Grant Emerson/Damage, Kyle Rayner/Green Lantern, Bart Allen/Impulse, Rose Wilson, Martix Supergirl, a maybe-new-maybe-not version of Terra, and more. This group was still under the New Titans name and in the same run, despite little member overlap. They split up when the government pulled funding.
Apparently there was another iteration of the Outsiders II briefly in the mid-90s, but I truly cannot tell you much about it. Still unrelated to the younger generations.
The Teen Titans II (mid 90s) were the first group to use the name with zero tie to the founders. Led by a de-aged Ray Palmer/Atom, this group consisted of teens kidnapped by aliens and genetically modified--Toni Monetti/Argent, Isiah Crockett/Joto, Audrey Spears/Prysm, and Cody Discoll/Risk. This run only lasted a couple years.
Young Justice I (late 90s/early 00s) sprang out of a team up between Tim Drake/Robin, Superboy (later named Kon-el), Bart Allen/Impulse, and Secret. The team shortly added Cassie Sandsmark/Wonder Girl and Cissie King-Jones/Arrowette, and later Anita Fite/Empress, Slobo, and Ray Terril/Ray. Under the vague mentorship of Red Tornado, this group had wacky coming of age adventures.
This is also when teams start to overlap:
The Titans I (late 90s/early 00s) formed out of the original (teen) Titans just really missing each other, okay? This team melded together the original fab five (Wally now the Flash; Garth now Tempest), Cyborg and Starfire of the original New Titans, Grant/Damage of Arsenal's New Titans, Toni/Argent of the second Teen Titans, and new-to-the-titans Jesse Quick. Other old Titans appeared here and there (Rose Wilson as Lian's babysitter <3), and a number of the starting group left along the way.
Events in 2003 broke up both Young Justice and the Titans simultaneously, and members shuffled around.
A few of the now-former Titans joined the Outsiders III (mid 00s), the one version of that team relevant here. The team was formed by Roy and initially led by Dick, and included members like Grace Choi, Anissa Pierce/Thunder, Metamorpho/Shift, and later Jennifer-Lynn Hayden/Jade and Kory/Starfire. This team was kind of a disaster (compliment) and the series took an adult tone with mature themes.
(Note: I dig the 2003 Outsiders, but there was no reason for them to be called the Outsiders. It’s just hollow name reuse for no reason.)
Meanwhile, the Teen Titans III (mid 00s-early 10s) formed with a combination of older members from the New Titans--like Kory, Vic, and Gar (Beast Boy again)--and younger members from Young Justice--Tim, Cassie, Kon-El Conner Kent, and Bart. Others like Raven and Mia Dearden/Speedy joined later.
Honestly I’m having a hard time cleanly describing the tone/identity of this series. It was a superheroes series about a team of young heroes/sidekicks. Idk. It exists and ran for a long time.
After the Infinite Crisis in 2006, everything in DC jumped One Year Later. Over the course of that missing year, the Teen Titans had a variety of rotating, mostly second-string members. But that’s really just briefly seen in 52 and never had any real appearances, so whatever.
After One Year Later, the team did have a major shake up. All the young adult members left, leaving just the teens, and many new members joined. And left. And joined. And left. I think Cassie is the only consistent member. There is a lot of turnover in the back half of this series, but some Teen Titans here include: Rose Wilson/Ravager, M’gann Morzz/Miss Martian, Eddie Bloomberg/Kid Devil/Red Devil, Jaime Reyes/Blue Beetle, and Amy Allen/Bombshell.
This constantly-rotating team would last all the way until the New 52.
Meanwhile the older generation kept switching:
The Outsiders also had a shake up after One Year Later, when it turned out they were all now fugitives for accidentally maybe doing some bad stuff. (Most important to me, Roy left so what is even the point now. “Dick is still there,” yeah but he’s not being a bitch (entertaining) anymore; he’s just grumpy.) Much of the team was gone by now, but they added Owen Mercer/Captain Boomerang Jr and Katana.
Only like a year (irl) later, Batman decided he wanted this to be his team again, and almost the entirety of the team swapped out for the Outsiders IV, which was more like the original/standard line-up, with only a few from the unusual 2003 iteration.
With the Outsiders a team of real adults again, many of the young adults were freed up. And you know what that means! Titans II (late 00s): these friends truly cannot stay away from each other. It’s a combination of the original team and the NTT: Dick, Roy (now Red Arrow), Donna, Wally, Kory, and Vic.
And also Gar and Raven kept moving between the Titans and the Teen Titans, because DC couldn’t decide how old they were supposed to be after Raven’s de-aging.
Despite the great line-up, these Titans were not to last, as DC was making a lot of changes and half the characters had other things to do. Dick had to replace a missing Bruce as Batman. Wally was always over-taxed as the Flash on the JLA and the Titans. Roy’s daughter was killed, leading him to relapse, in what everyone naively thought was the worst writing Roy would ever have before the New 52 proved just how much worse it could get. The team fell apart.
Slade Wilson/Deathstroke swooped in to form the Titans: Villains for Hire (early 10s) a team of villains and morally grey characters like Cheshire, Osiris, and [deep sigh] downward spiral Roy (now Arsenal once again), all with their own agendas.
(Note: it’s dumb as hell that this team was called the Titans. It was even more hollow name re-use. Come on, DC, just make up a new name for once.)
In the very end, the villain part split and there was a glimmer that a healing Roy and a resurrected/not evil (long story) Joey Wilson might make a new Titans team, an abandoned idea that lingers in my mind to this day...
But t’was not to be because--
A Prime Earth History
Flashpoint blew up and rebooted the entire universe.
This recap will be shakier, as I have not read anything from the latter part of it. (Still trapped in the New 52 over here.) Also I’m going to stop recapping the Outsiders entirely, sorry.
In the New 52, all history and most of what made DC good was erased. The Titans had never existed.
The (New 52) Teen Titans IV (early/mid 10s) were, in their continuity, the first team of that name. This team included rebooted, in-name only versions of Tim Drake [redacted]/Red Robin, Cassie Sandsmark/Wonder Girl, Kon-El/Superboy, Bart Allen Bar Torr/Kid Flash, Kiran Singh/Solstice, Miguel Barragan/Bunker, etc.
The theme of this run was “bad writing” and the tone was “awful”. Somehow it lasted the entire New 52 and into Rebirth.
My knowledge is really, really shaky after this:
The (Rebirth) Titans III (late 10s) formed with the original generation finally reunited, after fans revolted in the face of DC trying to erase Wally West from existence. This team had the fab five and fellow original (Teen) Titan, Lilith/Omen.
Then the (Rebirth) Teen Titans V (late 10s) formed, with a bunch of iconic young adult characters like Kory, Vic, and Gar, plus teenager Wallace West/Kid Flash (not that one; there are two Wally Wests now) and Damian Wayne/Robin. Apparently Damian is the leader of this team despite being the only child on it and. why. I don’t understand.
At some point that team revamped and became entirely a team of youngsters like Damian, Wallace, the new Red Arrow/Emiko Queen, and Xiomara Rojas/Crush.
Young Justice II (late 10s/early 20s) reformed after a while, with the universe slowly restoring bits from New Earth. This team was Kon, Bart, Tim, Cassie, and a few new peers like Jinny Hex and Teen Lantern.
The (Teen?) Titans Academy (early 20s) I believed formed with the idea of older, established Titans like Vic, Donna, Kory, etc mentoring a whole bunch of very new young heroes who I’m looking at the wiki list for and boy that’s a lot of names. Huh. I think this one is still ongoing?
Which means we have reached the present, and my list now ends.
I wonder if this makes the top 5 for my longest posts.
#*#ask#anon#*dc#dc#dc ref#dc timelines#dc comics#teen titans#titans#young justice#outsiders#dick grayson#tim drake#wally west#roy harper#donna troy#conner kent#bart allen#rose wilson#starfire#what am i doing i'm not tagging even half these characters before my hands cramp and die#there's too many#''how many iterations of these teams were there and can you list all their members'' you might as well ask me to kill god#i mean i'm gonna give it a good shot but it's a lot#10to2
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I realised I never created a list of links to each of my Batfam Bingo Card stories when I completed it, so here is that list. Thank you to those who have read the stories, liked them and even re-blogged them! :D
Also on AO3
Care - Tim & Bruce & Alfred
2. The Big Damn Kiss - TimKon
3. Titus - Damian & Dick & Titus
4. Crossover Fic - TimKon & BillyTeddy (Wickling)
5. War - TimKon & Dick & Jason
6. Wally West - Dick & Wally
7. AU: Zoo - Batboys
8. AU: Secret Agents - Dick & Jason & Tim
9. Fear Toxin - Dick & Jason & Tim
10. Idiots In Love - TimKon
11. AU: Magic - Dick & Jason & Tim
12. Can't Touch Each Other Curse - TimKon
13. Don't You Dare Pity Me - TimKon & Dick
14. AU: Ghosts - Jason & Tim
15. Hurt/Comfort - Tim & Dick
16. Amnesia - Tim & Bruce & Dick & Jason
17. Did Not Get the Guy/Girl - Jason & Damian
18. Baby Fic - TimKon
19. Villainous Crush - Jason & Tim
20. Down - TimKon
21. Clark Kent - TimKon & Batfam & Clark
22. Dark Fic - TimKon & Cassie & Bart & Dick
23. Steph Brown - Tim & Steph
24. Piano - Dick & Jason & Tim & Damian
#batfam bingo 2019#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth#stephanie brown#clark kent#wally west#kon el#conner kent#timkon#batbros#sibling relationship#dc comics#fic list#fanfiction
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Sideshow Bob x Vampyre Reader
(wwdits)
You were in the store, on your own since your familiar was too scared to leave his house. He said something about some guy, called Sideshow Bob being released a few days ago. He's scared of him killing him, which is preposterous, if anyone were to threaten you or him you'd kill them, or at the very least scare them away. You looked at the products in front of you, without the boy here how were you supposed to know what these things properly were? Bart's dad, Homer, had asked you to go get Duff, or whatever the hell that means. You see someone you think works here.
"Errr, excuse me, do you happen to know what duff is and of its whereabouts?" You asked the scrawny 19-year-old, he turned looking at you.
"Um, if I'm remembering correctly, I think it's on the 11th aisle," he replied.
"Why thank you," and then you quickly disappeared around the corner, looking for the 11th aisle. When you finally got there you looked around and spotted cans that said duff on them. As you grabbed them some teenagers walked past.
"Hey, it's not Halloween, loser!" You turned to face them.
"And good evening to you too, my young fellows!" You said, they gave you weird looks and walked off. You looked back down at the cans in your hands, whilst doing so you could sense someone looking at you. Thinking it were the teenagers again you snapped your head up in that direction. You made eye contact with a man, who was most certainly not the teenagers. He smiled nervously not wanting you to recognise him from the news. Now you got a good look at him, you noticed his hair was shaped like a palm tree, a maroon one. Your eyes scanned down the man, he had a blue shirt on with a bit of a round middle, your eyes scanned lower to his beige pants, and then your eyes lingered on his shoes, in all your time you had never seen feet that size. You were cut from your thoughts as the man started walking towards you and talking. He didn't want you to figure out who he was, little did he know you don't look at the news. "Don't listen to them, I like your costume," he said smoothly. You looked at yourself then back at the man in front of you.
"What costume?" you asked confused. The man looked dumbfounded.
"I-I-I duh um," but before he could explain himself he could hear a phone ringing. You got it out of your pocket once you finally found it, answering it it was Homer.
"Heeeeellllooooooooo," you said strangely.
"Have you got my beer yet?" Homer whined on the other end.
"Oh! oh yes! The cans with liquid inside" you said waving the duff around, whilst Bob stared at you.
"Just hurry up already!" Homer cried like a baby on the other side.
"Ok ok" You sighed, you looked back up at Bob.
"Goodbye palm tree man," you waved to him as you walked away, leaving Bob to wonder what had just happened.
--------
You walked past the Flanders' house and saw Ned waving at you from the window, you felt uneasy, you could feel all the crosses and religious stuff in that house, you ran away and got to the Simpsons' house. You had already been invited into this house before, so you formed into vapor and seeped underneath the door.
"I'm back!" you yelled, Homer came running.
"Heeeeeyyy...how did you get in-*gasp* Beer!" He then suddenly went sour.
"Only six!" He grabbed the beer off you and walked back to the couch. You then went up the stairs, walking to Bart's room. You opened the door to get hit in the head with a rock, that had been fired with a slingshot. It didn't faze you, it practically did nothing.
"Oh it's you, I thought you were Sideshow Bob, sorry" Bart sat back down on his bed looking sad.
"S'fine," you said in a monotone voice, you smiled ruffling his hair.
"Get some rest kiddo," Bart giggled. After Bart had finally fallen asleep you went to the window to watch stars slowly move across the sky, you were also waiting for it to be morning, your bedtime.
----------
You climbed out of the coffin you and Bart had disguised as a toy box. It was finally the start of the night. You walked up to Bart's window and opened it quietly, and tried your best to quietly close it. Once that was done with you transformed into a bat. You flew all the way to the park. You found a spot you wanted to land and transformed back and landed on your feet.
You calmly walked down the path, but your lovely stroll was soon rudely interrupted. A man in a hoody had walked up to you with a gun.
"Give me your wallet!" he shouted, you stared at him, waiting for him to correct his mistake.
"If you continue, you will regret this," you said emotionless.
"GIVE ME YOUR FUCKI-" You cut him off, grabbing his throat, and you shoved him into the grass, he shot you in reflex and it didn't really do anything, there was blood but it healed quite quickly. You showed your teeth and sunk them into the man's neck, draining his whole blood supply and discarding his body. His blood didn't even taste very nice. You started walking again, while you were walking you noticed a figure ahead of you. As you got closer you realised it was the man from the store. You quietly snuck up behind him.
"Fancy seeing you here," you said startling him since he didn't know anyone was there. He turned around
"It's you from the shop, you called me Palm Tree Man," he said recognising you.
"Well, I don't really know your name," you said childishly.
"Robert," he said thankful that someone doesn't know him as a criminal.
"Sooooooo, what are you doing out this late?" you asked, he was taken aback.
"I-um I like walking at night, you?" continuing the conversation.
"I just had my breakfast!" You said happily.
"ch-bu-h-what? Breakfast?!" He asked, not sure if he heard correctly.
"Yup" You answered starting to walk again, he started walking with you. That's when he noticed the bullet hole in your clothes and the blood on your shirt.
"Oh my! Are you alright?" he questioned concerned, you looked down.
"Huh? Oh! Yeah, it's nothing" You smiled walking backwards. Bob knew it was most certainly not nothing but he didn't push because he'd only just met you he doesn't want to scare you away. You were enjoying talking to this man, you kept walking until he had stepped on a rake, he flinched closing his eyes waiting for it to smack him in the face and for the pain, but it never came. He opened one eye and saw that you had quickly grabbed the rake before it could hit him. He looked at you, your face looked so, angry. All of a sudden you were happy again and flung the rake into the sky and it disappeared. Bob watched in awe as it didn't seem to come back down.
#sideshow bob the simpsons#the simpsons#x reader#sideshow bob#sideshow bob x reader#fanfic#vampire#vampire reader#vampyr#sideshow bob x vampire reader#the Simpsons x reader#robert terwilliger#robert terwilliger x reader#wwdits#wwdits reader#im a simp for the 🌴#im a simp#🌴
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It's stupid how antis lie that Jenny was 16 when she slept with Chuck when they have no issue with Nate and Damien being involved with Jenny even though they"re the same age as Chuck. Her 17th birthday was a week before Nate's 19th in 3x17 which took place on April 5th and two months after Chuck's 19th. 3x22 was said to have happened in May therefore Jenny was 17 since her birthday is March 30th and Chuck 19 since his birthday's in January when they slept together. When Serena was 16 Carter jokingly wrote about her sleeping with billionaires in 1x10 which is creepy considering she was a minor and he was in his 20s. I do enjoy season 3 Vanderbaizen and their relationship outside of that creepiness. Not as creepy as him sleeping with Blair when she was in high school. He was groping Blair's leg when she was sitting alone at the bar heartbroken and he offered to buy her a drink even though unlike him she was under drinking age and primarily slept with her to get back at Chuck rather than genuine admiration. Even creepier since it's brought up in season 5 that after sleeping with Blair Carter stole and wore her underwear to a dinner. In Chuck and Jenny's case they were both heartbroken and under drinking age. I do like Carter more than Chuck but wouldn't consider him better. Even though Carter was ethical enough to help Elle flee when requested by Chuck I do find it questionable for him to have been a member of a secret group that had unwilling sex workers since Elle said she didn't want to be one and that if they tried to leave that profession they'd get killed since they knew "too much," and was forced to change her name and move far away. Disgusting how Bart was actively part of that ring for many years (since the 90s). It's one thing to not intervene against that illegal activity but another to actively have dubious/nonconsensual sex with sex workers who are forced to remain in that ring and some of them may have not wanted to be in it in the first place. It also bothered me how Bart only yelled at Chuck when an adult stripper was all over him in 1x7 when the adult deserved to be yelled at. Like Jack it was indicated multiple times that Bart was also into much younger women. Bart was just more reserved and protective over his reputation than Jack was, perhaps due to his age. He had dirt on everyone due to his detective and therefore knew Jack slept with Blair when she was in high school and continued to do business with him and didn't criticize him, even while also knowing since season 1 Chuck loved Blair. I found it inappropriate how Bart was feeling up Pauletta's lower back as her employer and it's understandable how Chuck thought he was hooking up with her since that's not how a boss is supposed to behave with an employee. It was also creepy how it was stated Tripp liked Serena years before they had an affair since she was 18 and he was 26 when they dated.
hi!! this came through twice but I'll just answer it once 🫶🏻🫶🏻 there are some super good and interesting points here and I'm gonna try to break them down a l'il so
exactly!! chuck didn't sleep with jenny when she was underage nor was their age gap too much, especially if you take chuck's birthday as being in may instead of january meaning he was still 18 and jenny was 17. people love jenny and nate then turn around and hate chuck when the age difference is almost identical, it's so hypocritical and kinda odd like why does nate get a pass on all his questionable behaviour but chuck gets hate for things he never even did 😭😭
I never really liked the blair/carter thing and when u add in the age difference it's crazy like why was carter beefing with high schoolers and using a vulnerable blair to get one up on chuck, like I get why blair was in that headspace but carter just entirely took advantage of her and no-one really mentions it. also I always forget the underwear thing bc it's SO unnecessary and weird like what was the point of making a mostly forgotten fling even more bizarre. I definitely preferred carter with serena as I think he actually had feelings for her, but tbh I don't really like him and I think a lot of his fans are blinded by sebastian stan being attractive and just ignore carter's behaviour (again while they vilify chuck for the same or less)
truthfully I also forgot a lot about elle and the sex ring but it's definitely weird that carter was a member and that it just... kept going on?? bart being a member was fitting for him but also odd bc was he still sleeping with those women while he was married to lily?? it's all just kinda insane
I've always thought bart was just a massive hypocrite about chuck and women, and YES I've always thought that his hands were inappropriate on paulette like no wonder chuck saw that bc it didn't look platonic or reasonable at all. I'd never really considered that bart would know about jack and blair (which... I've already said I find that incredibly gross and pointless) but ur so right he never said or did anything about it. also the fact that bart always put the responsibility on chuck (a literal teenager) to behave appropriately when he's grown up with a serial womaniser as a father and an equally womanising uncle like why aren't u talking to the adult women here or trying to set a better example
omg yes like tripp... why were u into a teenage girl when u were engaged/dating someone ik every man loves serena but why so many grown men like it's just weird and creepy and serena deserves better
#ask#answered#gossip girl#chuck bass#carter baizen#jenny humphrey#nate archibald#blair waldorf#bart bass#serena van der woodsen
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Impulse (1995) #23
IDK Max, you haven't really been teaching him the ins and outs of hero-ing, just how to vibrate so far as we have seen. Maybe if you took the time to listen to him and change your approach you might understand that Bart is still operating under VR rules, because he was in VR for a possible relative 19 years, and you can't just undo that in 4-6 months with no guidance other than 'vibrate' and 'don't use your speed'.
Impulse (1995) #23
FUCK
This should have been a ground breaking moment for Max to understand what he needed to do to adapt his approach so Bart could understand him and be successful. BUT.
Impulse (1995) #23
Max just sees it as a failure. There's more to this than Bart though. Max is also dealing with his failed relationship with Helen hanging over his head, and his own past mistakes. It contributes to Max going into total emotional shutdown.
Max went to Manchester, with Bart - specifically so he could be close to his daughter Helen. But when Helen rejects him, and when Bart shows that 'none of his training stuck' it just snowballs together to make Max feel like the failure.
Even so, the one who suffers is Bart.
Impulse (1995) #23
Have you ever had someone PISSED at you, and you knew they were pissed, but you didn't know WHY they were pissed or what you even did, they refused to talk to you, and you were a kid, so you didn't have the communication skills to reach out to them, so you just did whatever you possibly could think of to make the person happy with you, but it fucking failed and you were powerless in your situation because no matter how much you tried to show that you were GOOD you weren't?
That's how this feels.
Max was more pissed at himself than at Bart but all Bart knows here is he's mad and he doesn't know why.
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Modern Westeros/Freaky Friday Au
Creativity has gripped me again. And when I meant grip, I meant it is struggling me like Homer Simpsons to Bart.
It takes place in a modern Westeros like my previous au, only that the monarchy is already abolished decades. Houses, however, are still relevant like the Targaryen, Hightower, and Stark. The idea that Rhaenrya (they're nonbinary/masculine, use they/he pron. and prefer the name Rhaenor or Rhae) is dating Alicent, and they're in college. They both in college, either in their first or second year (they're both 19).Rhaenor is pursuing dracology (Syrax here, still a dragon but size of a large cat), and Alicent is majoring in theology (still a devoted 7-faithist, but she is an Adolent (a Reformative denomination of the 7-faith).
The idea is that, after having pre-marital sex with Alicent the previous night, Rhae wakes up in her canonHotd-bed. Like a typical person will do, she freaks thr fuck out, summoning a maid which Rhae scream at, which summon her swonshield she also scream in flight (she naked mind you). Meanwhile, canonHotd Rhaenrya is in Rhae and Modern Alicent (who is naked, too) and she too freak out and cause Alicent and cat-size Syrax freak (she almost burned down the dormitory, again).
The idea that the two try to navigate in her alternate self, though canonHotd characters immediately know Rhae isn't their rhaenrya. One idea is that instead of switching body, their actual bodies change places (so Rhae will have her undercut short-hair), and Rhae kept her phone. And shenanigans assure.
Like the idea Rhae is allowed to attend Small Council meeting, and she outstanded all the Council members by her high school degree (mind you, a private academy because they're a nepobaby and how they met Alicent) and like 4-5 college terms. She awestruck and said outloud that Maesters are abolished and seceded by a college-like system. Beesbury immediately likes him while Melos hates his guts. When he questioned that they should examine if Rhar's has his maidenhood (all of them keep mispronouns them), Rhae will laugh at him and said maidenhood doesn't exist.
Another is Rhae meeting canonHotd Syrax and going apeshit: "look at you! You're fucking huge! My baby is now a mighty dragon now!" And Syrax doesn't really mind them.
Also, Rhae having his phone freaks out all the canonHotd characters, too.
#hotd#house of the dragon#rhaenrya targaryen#alicent hightower#rhaenicent#modern flip au#wlw#sapphic#hotd fic#hotd fanfic
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Okay I've been READING COMICS finally. I've not had anything on my TV watch list (that I wanted to watch), and I've had a lot of free time, so. Comics.
Green Arrow (1988) Vol. 1: Hunter's Moon, Vol. 2: Here There Be Dragons
I'm going to be honest I liked these way more than I was expecting to. The very prominent politics of this one are very wobbly compared to the Adams/O'Neil GA/GL, but it's a little more modern in its sentiments. Surprisingly progressive on gay men and East Asian characters, surprisingly regressive on Native American and Black characters. The colouring had a lot to contribute to that read. Grell's pacing is solid, his ongoing here has a lot more light in it than in Longbow Hunters, and his Dinah kind of dips in and out of being a really strong character and disappearing again into a kind of generic female cattiness. Art on this one has that wonderful late eighties/early nineties quality where the linework is starting to explode in what's creatively allowed. It's very pretty. Planning on picking up Vol. 3 as soon as I can track it down.
Green Arrow (2001) Vol. 1: Quiver
Okay, I understand why people like this one. It's a deep-cuts, I would have been lost if I hadn't been reading at least a little chronologically through GA comics, and it's very very good. It's stuck a little in the nineties curse re: art, and I got so thrown by he-looks-white!Connor Hawke it's almost funny, but the pacing is amazing amazing. Very few comics are paced this well, where something substantial happens every issue in an organic way that moves the story forward. Also extremely politically stuck in its time period; if Grell was worried about China and Iran and Cold War/post-Cold War politics, this one is concerned with 9/11 and what's going to become War on Terror talking points. Shout-out to having more Tim Drake mentions than several recent volumes of Batman I've read where he's theoretically Robin.
Green Arrow: Stranded
This one is cute. 10/10 for kid Oliver's green hoodie, it's fantastic. This one strongly resembled Batgirl: Shadow of the Bat in tone, where they're preserving what they can about the canonical origin story but kind of glossing over the details and hoping the cute art will carry the violence past concerned editorial/parental eyes. It's fun, it's about a twenty-minute read and Oliver's crazy archery glee plus the pressure of having to take care of other people really strengthen the comic. It does a nice little loop where Oliver doesn't really have to learn anything about himself except that he can be brave when he needs to be, but his dad has to learn something about him. (Sometimes GA writers talk about the stranded-on-the-island era as a kind of "life lessons" era and it drives me bonkers. So this was nice.)
We Are Robin (2016) Vol. 1: The Vigilante Business
This comic...really lost me. I really liked it conceptually and as a Gotham/batbook. The art was fun and dynamic and the Duke voice was excellent crazy fantastic. But regarding the actual narrative, it moved way too slowly. Even after six issues I'm not sure what the actual drive of the story was, and none of the dangling threads were resolved. I had really wanted to read this, but it's definitely pushed Vol. 2 and Robin War farther back on my list, because this was more frustrating than entertaining to parse. Not helped on my end by really not having any context for what was going on in New52 Batman; this is potentially better if you read it in a row with the subsequent volumes, but I wouldn't know yet.
The Flash (2016) Vol. 19: The One-Minute War
Okay this was...not exactly what I thought it was going to be, because it didn't really deliver on the promise of the premise of a One-Minute War. It was, however, extremely fun silly comics story, and it completely sold me on reading the rest of the Adams Flash run. Bart Allen my boy Bart Allen. <3 Also Irey! And Jai! And Linda! And Wally! Really crazy Flash speed force stuff that made the sci-fi part of my brain go whizz-bang-whirr with joy. I read all that GA and decided I was definitely a batbook fan, but I read this and seriously considered that I could become a big Flash fan. Anyway, I had a lot of fun with this one. Strongly recommend although it's Vol. 19 and if you don't know all the characters it won't make any sense and I think it will be much less fun. It's a character story. (On which note, I wish it had tried to be less girlpower. Stronger Linda/Irey characterization here would have done a lot for it.)
Nightwing (1996): Brothers in Blood
I can't believe I found this, I was literally so psyched to read this. I love Jason as a villain, he's just somehow the perfect combination of compelling antagonist character and so, so lame. Everything about this plot was ??? but the tentacle guy coming out of nowhere was a huge plus. Jason should've got to keep the tentacle powers I'm just saying. Dick's just very Dick Grayson in this thing, his life is a mess, it was surprisingly tonally coherent but also very much...not my tone? The last Nightwing I read I think was Taylor's and the shift between the perfect TT apartment and Dick's definitely illegal loft here, with a pretty redheaded girl being mildly snarky in both, is...weird. The more things change the more they stay the same? He also looks about fifteen years older here than he does in TT's run, which is just funny. Kind of confirmed for me that Nightwing (1996) is almost definitely a very good comic that I probably won't enjoy that much. And that Jason's Actual Villain Era is fantastic and I should hunt down every appearance. He's so much more interesting before he became a moral conundrum for Bruce to be sad over.
#oh goodness since this write up I've read even more#will save them for next time#now I need a tag for my reporting on comics...#penny dispatch#oh yeah I like that#please take this lightly this is just some idle thoughts if I'm going to seriously reflect on any of these you will know
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My Predictions for Caleb and Sophia
For the uninitiated: Caleb and Sophia are two characters that feature in short videos produced by the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society intended to indoctrinate Jehovah's Witness children. They're two young children, siblings, raised as Jehovah's Witnesses and dealing with many of the problems growing up as one brings. For people raised as Jehovah's Witnesses, it brings back a flood of insane memories. I kind of can't help but like them. The kids go through things I went through myself, and as I watch I imagine what they're feeling in that moment. The things I would have felt. The thoughts and emotions I would have suppressed. If you're curious I recommend looking them up on youtube. Owen Morgan aka Telltale has a bunch of videos where he reacts to them and provides commentary. He's just one of many that cover the videos.
Whenever I watch a Caleb and Sophia video I always speculate how they end up. So here's my predictions.
We'll start with Caleb, since his story is one that easily could have been mine. Caleb is the Bart Simpson. He's a kind of rambunctious kid. He would like sports and video games if he was allowed, but he doesn't have those outlets available to him so it all becomes bible study and chores. He's given busy work at meetings and field service, and eventually he gets given "privileges" like working the soundboard and passing the microphones around at the Watchtower Magazine study or organizing and manning the literature counter. Eventually he'll make Ministerial Servant, which is the rank below Elder in the congregation and basically means he's being groomed for command. But thankfully he's never going to be an Elder. He's eventually going to be put in charge of the congregation's other rambunctious young boys, and will be responsible for studying with them and indoctrinating them into the Watchtower Society's beliefs. He's going to be seen as a role model and success story. His post high-school years will see him juggling his responsibilities with the congregation and working in a trade. Statistically window washing, but any given trade is likely. He'll apprentice under another Jehovah's Witness, possibly a relative, who is also likely an Elder who now holds his economic and social future in his hands. Now you'd think with all this going on, is Caleb happy? Well, that depends. He might genuinely be if he's kept too busy to really think about his life or what he wants from it and is too sheltered to experience anything more. But that's really difficult to do. Most JW young men get to experience just enough of the world to give them a taste, and everyone has a vice. Statistically it's porn and smoking. Chances are he'll get caught once, repent, lose his privileges, and then eventually make a slow return shortly after getting married. Caleb is getting married by 19 at the latest. He's full of so many hormones and urges if there's no release he's going to pop. So he'll marry literally the nearest non-related Jehovah's Witness girl roughly his age. If there are none nearby, he'll meet one at a convention or (scandalously) JWdate. Yes, that's real, and it's kind of an open secret because dating websites are not really what a JW should be about. Somewhere in the following years he's going to be working hard at his trade, trying to regain his status as a Ministerial Servant, and figuring out how to live with this stranger he rushed into marrying. Maybe they can make it work. Maybe they can't. I can't say. But kids will be happening soon. Eventually Caleb is going to hit a crisis moment where he needs to decide whether or not this is the life he wants. There's a roughly 66% chance he doesn't. He's got to make a choice. Does he stay in the life he has? Can he leave the Watchtower Society behind and still keep his family? That I can't say. I like to think his wife also has similar doubts, and through this their bond strengthens, they come to truly love each other deeper than they did when they first married, and leave together, sparing their children from the same life they were forced into. But doing that means they'll only ever have each other. Sometimes that's enough. Sometimes it isn't. His wife could divorce him, taking the kids and leaving him alone. He'll eventually find apostate material online and become fervently anti-JW, with only bitter memories among the ashes of a life that never had a chance to be anything but this.
Next we'll turn to Sophia. Some of my story for her is pure conjecture based on what I've seen from friends I grew up with. When I see Sophia, I see specific girls I knew growing up and I think of things they've told me about their lives. I don't have any experience being a girl in the Jehovah's Witnesses, but her story is one that I feel is honestly similar to mine just with her dealing with all of the added pressure of being a woman in a fucked up patriarchal clusterfuck like that. I'll have to make a part 2 for her, as Tumblr has a character count. I will reblog this post with that when I am done with it. Thank you for reading this far. I hope this provides some insight.
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No Evil and Bechtile Test.
I got bored and decided to see how many episodes of no evil pass the bechtile test.
for those of you who don't know the bechtlile test is this:
1. has two (named) women,
2. talk to each other about
3.something other than a man.
----- so here are the episodes and the reason they do or do not pass.
Ep 1. No, only has one female character.
Ep 2.No, has multiple named girl characters, but no one talks in this episode.
Ep. 3 Yes, calamity and kitty talk about the ponies on the coat.
Ep 4. Yes, if singing counts was a conversation.
Ep. 5 No, two named girl characters. they have a conversation but Paula and kitty talk about Huey and why he has rocks tied to his tail.
Ep 6. No, two named characters talk, but not to each other.
Ep 7. No, no one talks
Ep 8. Yes, wrip and calamity carry the episode
Ep 9. yes, calamity and kitty talk about borrowing a pumpkin.
Ep 10. Yes, Kitty asks calamity where her pumpkin and scarecrow is. also the Angle complementing kitty.
Ep 11. yes, discussion of how to heal the sick of Macoy
Ep 12. yes, Kitty asks angle why she is here.
Ep 13. maybe... yes, if chief is a name then calamity and chief talk with each other, like asking why they have a barn full of chupacabra.
Ep 14. No. its a story, but no conversation between named female characters, just Wrip saying that Vinkel had no tail.
Ep 15. yes. calamity says that she'll pass out without the poppy charm.
Ep 16. No! great song but no conversation.
Ep 17. yes Wrip tells calamity off about kidnappings and kitty tells her the tuning fork is hers.
Ep 18. yes. Frida talks to calamity and kitty. Frida also talks to Emonia about a note.
Ep 19. yes. everyone has a conversation.
Ep 20. yes. calamity and kitty talk about what they are doing.
Ep 21. yes. Wrip shows calamity what black bart looks like. kitty talks to angle
Ep 22. No, I love Paula, she's great, but she's the only named character that talks. we don't know what ichabod's mothers name is.
Ep 23. yes. calamity and kitty have a short conversation. also Paula MVP this episode.
Ep 24. yes, Emoida, Frida and Emily , discuss the dolls Huey gave them.
Ep 25. yes. is ASL talking according to the Becktle test? I mean ASL is a conversation. so I count it.
Ep 26. no, Zotsiketsil and Paula chat with other characters, but not each other.
Ep 27. yes. angle gives permission to Emily and Emoida to stay in Richland and they compliment her dolls. how old is angle? she probably made the Dino dolls. but that means she needed to find their bones.
Ep 28. No. the characters don't talk to each other.
Ep 29. No. the characters don't talk to each other. great character work though.
Ep 30. no, Paula slays again but only talks to guys.
Ep 31. No. Ah clark.
Ep 32. No.
Ep 33. No.
Ep 34. yes. calamity says it's not safe to travel at night to kitty. also hoop snakes my beloved.
Ep 35. yes. calamity says no to kitty. and calamity and kitty talk to murder about the mercy bow.
Ep 36. No, kitty and calamity talked a lot, but never too eachother about something other than corn. though kitty asks murder about finding a medicine man. and they? she? nods.
Ep 37. No, only one feminine character speaks and they are an unnamed charecter. this is still one of my favorite episodes.
Ep 38. yes, kitty and murder talk about fixing the temple. also introduction of mama! I adore grandmother spider, but I may be biased.
Ep 39. No, kitty, calamity and Xochiquetzal talk, but not to each other. the stylization of the game is so nice, creepy bones, but nice.
Ep 40. No only the nurse ratchet looking charecter talks. also that second nurse is great. she's fun to watch even though she dose not say a word.
Ep 41. Yes, Paula and Calamity talk about travel and getting vineyard jailed. Wrip and Paula also talk about the conning the towns. ah the kids are always a delight.
Ep 42. yes? calamity and kitty talk about city bureaucracy.
Ep 43. yes. kitty and calamity talk about jailbreak. man Charles is so dramatic. it's still funny that he only started to look like a villain when he joined the good guys.
Ep 44. No.
Ep 45. No.
Ep 46. Yes. man the kids are so fun.
26/46 pass the test.
a bit more than half.
I gotta admit that the beck tile test is not the best test for figuring out representation, it's better than nothing, and this was more of a fun exersise more than any sort of serious analysis. its also a test that is clearly designed more for film than it is for shorts.
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jpeg my beloved i come bearing ao3 wrapped questions! a lot of them, like always, so feel free to pick and choose 💕💕💕
5, 9, 18, 19, 25, 28, 29, 30
greeting you with a kiss on both cheeks <3
9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?
I love JayTim!! There are just so many Situations to put them in and they work for, like, every single dynamic ever. I have so many Ideas for them.
18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?
Bart. Bart Allen my beloved. He is such an incredible character and probably my ultimate blorbo and he is kind of hellish to write for. I mean, goddamn, how do you write the internal monologue of a guy who is literally written in canon as someone who thinks largely in images? It won't stop me, but it sure as hell will slow me down.
19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?
Mayhaps some more KonBart. Just the YJ98 team in general INCLUDING Cissie, Anita, and Greta. My girls don't get enough love. I want to pepper in more obscure bits of canon about the whole lot. And also try writing some orgy/foursome porn!
25. Did you receive any gifts this year?
I have received the priceless gift of support and appreciation from all the wonderful people who like the stuff I make <3
(But if this is specifically referring to the gifting of fics on ao3, then the answer is no.)
30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?
Lol, Bean, it took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that you are, in fact, jumpingbean14. Imagine my shock when I found out that one of my biggest supporters was one of my biggest supporters ffffff.
5, 28, and 29 answered here!
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