#Agamemnon

[firstknightvulion]

Is it any surprise I like me some Greek Mythology?

I hate the modern depictions of Helen/Paris/Menelaus.

Menelaus was a nice guy, Helen was manipulated by Aphrodite and Paris is…Paris. Fuck that guy. Not literally, he doesn’t deserve it.

The Iliad be like:

Paris: Any advice for your dear husband as he goes out to duel?

Helen turns to Paris. She is wearing ‘Team Menelaus’ hat, a ‘I love my real husband shirt’ and her right hand is covered by a ‘Menelaus #1’ giant, foam hand.

Helen: Die. Preferably, screaming.

Paris watches Helen stand atop the walls. She raises her shirt, flashing her boobs in Menelaus’ direction. On them is written ‘Kick His Ass, Baby’.

The entire Greek army stares. Except Odysseus. Menelaus gives them the death glare. The entire Greek army awkwardly looks away. Except Odysseus.

I also love the idea of Odysseus and Menelaus being Ancient Greek Wifeguys.

Odysseus walks into Menelaus’ tent. Menelaus looks up hopefully.

Menelaus: *hopefully* Wife?

Odysseus: *shaking his head* Not wife.

Menelaus: *sadly* Miss wife.

Odysseus: *sadly* Miss wife too.

Several hours and jugs of wine later…

Agamemnon steps into the tent.

Odysseus and Menelaus: *drunk and crying hysterically* Want wife!!!

Agamemnon backs out of the tent.

I also also feel like Helen may harbor some resentment towards Aphrodite.

Aphrodite appears in front of the Palace in Sparta.

Aphrodite: *smiling happily* Hey, gurl!

Helen immediately runs up to her and decks her in the face. Aphrodite goes down like a sack of bricks. Helen returns inside. Menelaus looks between the unconscious Goddess and the threshold of his home. After a moment, he follows his wife inside and closes the door. Aphrodite lays there for several hours.

[patrokronk]

The Trojan wars began for Helen yes but they ended because of Patroclus and I think that’s beyond beautiful

[smallsinger5901]

#1 achilles hater bc what do you mean he and agamemnon both nearly kill each other bc neither wants to give up the girls they kidnapped on the warpath, then when athene makes him he says ‘fine, but muuummmmm please make zeus kill all of my allies while i sit out of the fight until they come crawling and begging back to me 🥺’ and thetis agrees??? Like motherFUCKER that includes all of your OWN MEN! That includes PATROCLUS!! I hate all of these men but agamemnon and achilles most of all because of their stupid fucking egos and petty tantrums

[imaginarythingys]

It’s crazy that this is basically canon

That one scene..

Agamemnon: Few seconds ago, I lost my dear brother Menelaus.

Menelaus, bleeding from a noticably non-fatal spot: Quit telling everyone I’m dead! Agamemnon: Sometimes I can still hear his voice…

[simoondraws]

"The horse and the infant"

[inflamedautistic]

The Iliad is probably one of the funniest books I ever read

Like I'll be having a not-so-good day, then remember how Hector had given himself an entire pep talk to fight Achilles. He saw Achilles running full speed towards him and proceeds to just book it.

Or when Menelaus got shot by an arrow in like in an ultimately nonfatal spot, and Agamemnon begins prematurely mourning him while he's standing there like 🧍‍♂️” you're scaring the men.”

Or when Odysseus is walking around the camps with a royal scepter and is just beating people with it if he finds them packing or suggesting to leave.

Or when Hector is brainstorming on how to face Achilles and for a moment goes, “Maybe I could talk with him, we’re both princes, we can both be rational, I could reason with him… that's a horrible fucking idea.”

I have more, but these, in particular, really tickle me.

[nilo05]

agamemnon if athena had not intervened

[interretialia]

~~~

(anno nono Belli Troiani) Agamemnon: Cur vos non oblectatis? Agamemnon: Diserte vobis imperavi ut hoc faceretis.

(nine years into the Trojan War)

Agamemnon: Why is no one having a good time?

Agamemnon: I specifically ordered it.

[incorrecthomer]

[at Achilles's funeral] Agamemnon: *places his hand on the pyre and sobs* Agamemnon: How could you do this to me? We are so understaffed.

[smoolio]

Decided to revisit some Iliad designs and polish them up! Semi-canon to my EPIC designs. Odysseus is just too jacked lol

[calciumyum]

Epic (and iliad) Modern AU, they like messing with Agamemnon Ref by extrafabulouscomics, picture under the cut!

[wolfythewitch]

i'm not really sure what to caption this

[mushyooms]

feasting in Sparta

[kyleesarthell]

Iphigenia...

[neteyammeowmeow]

ARCANE STUDIO FORTICHE MAKING AN ILIAD/ODYSSEY HIGHSCHOOL COMING OF AGE MOVIE EVERYBODY MOVEEEE EVERYBODY MOOOOVEEEEE GET OUT OF THE WAY

[duckysprouts]

“fair enough”

by the way, i’m doing the math and they are like in their mid 20s when odysseus framed palamedes, lmao. and you think your workplace hostility is bad?

anyway, love ody but he can be such a dick