#Accounts Officer Jobs

[wasabi-gumdrop]

Kabru has a secret admirer in the castle!

[fuumiku]

It was Maid Day today yesterday a week ago so I got struck by inspiration to draw the worsties, and it ran away from me into a whole AU where they’re coworkers at a maid cafe. She’s a med student & this is just a part time job, and this is his depression job while he gets his life back together. He needs something he can be workaholic about to forget what it’s like having a personal life and personal issues. He’s actually the accountant, but the new hire janitor (Izutsumi) doesn’t show up for half her shifts and is a sloppy worker, so he gets the extra work of doing her job on top of his because he’s undervalued and overworked. Of course, janitors also have an uniform to keep the aesthetic cohesion as they go about cleaning the place, of course.

Senshi’s the part time cook you only see slivers off, he’s kind and warm when you do see him and have a chat but most shifts he’s in and out the kitchen without a trace. Laios and Falin are regulars because Falin and Marcille are besties & in the same med school, Laios accompanies Falin as she visits her friend at work and gets hooked on the food. Chilchuck has to remind Marcille to work instead of chatting with Falin for an hour, and next thing he knows she’s distracting him from work too. That’s it that’s the AU. Inspired by this idol AU fanart a bit <3

This was not meant to be birthday gift but well…… Happy bday Chil!!!

Read from left to right

[raenegade-accio]

Beware the following mindless deranged rambling that randomly hit me at 3am, but I can't be the only one who felt this way when playing for the first time...

Not having Officer Singer conspiring with Rookwood was a big fat missed opportunity

And whether it was intentional or not, it was all perfectly laid out for a plot like this since the start!

From her first theatrically heroic appearance in Hogsmeade:

As a Magical Law Enforcement Officer, I assume Singer is equipped with the basic knowledge of evacuation procedures e.g. steeling all persons away from the ongoing threat and ensuring they exit the area safely.

But what did she do instead?

Luring the massive troll into rampaging further into Hogsmeade, leaving a pair of 15-year-olds completely out in the open, vulnerable to new imminent dangers. And sure enough, as soon as MC and Natty/Sebastian were alone, another troll bursted in, mere seconds after Singer left the scene.

What's not to say she was only there to clear of any potential civilian witnesses, using the first troll to scare them away under the guise of doing her job, while the second troll quickly comes crashing in, with MC being served up in a silver platter.

Later we saw Singer comes running back and is understandably surprised to see MC unscathed. We get this strange piece of dialogue:

She didn't bother assessing, or at least securing the crime scene when it's literally the first step to ensure an initial investigation can later be conducted properly. Instead she does the complete opposite by having someone else to practically wipe it clean of anything worth further investigating; there definitely would’ve been debris or bits of damaged armour with lingering traces of dark magic, now all gone. Then she just vanished, leaving a couple of teenagers alone in an deserted area, again.

Later we meet Rookwood for the first time.

From here we learned that Rookwood watched the whole incident unfold, implying he planned to abduct MC at the first chance he got, one which Officer Singer very conveniently provided. The only thing stopping him was seeing the new kid had absolutely Thanos-ed a troll using an unfamiliar form of magic.

And he wasn't exactly discreet either. Rookwood, an infamous criminal gang leaders was allowed to so nonchalantly wander around Hogsmeade in the broad daylight and it was clear he could to barge into public establishments whenever he wanted while openly threatening a pair of minors. A Dark Wizard who was now actively stalking a literal child got to walk away scot-free. Pretty lenient...

At this point it wouldn't be too outrageous to say Singer is systematically participating in organised wizarding crime. Here's an interesting piece of dialogue from Rookwood:

"Favours." now we have proof that Rookwood somewhat has a little power in the Ministry. There could've been a transactional relationship between Rookwood and Singer too.

British policing wasn't exactly well liked; venal and corrupt as it was, elite officers colluding with criminals weren't new.

Assuming it applied to the Wizarding World too.

At the era HL takes place (the 1800s), bribery and cover-ups were daily occurrences, which could garner favours that often came from the very criminals from whom corrupt officers have collected in exchange for "turning a blind eye".

This one's a bit of a stretch to be honest, but it may have explained how Rookwood evidently was able to be as active as he was for "months." And it certainly would make more sense in how Singer maintained keep her position a lawwoman that's reputable and admired by the locals as long as she did despite her blatant inactions, considering the possibilities he helped pulled some strings.

It'd be too easy to claim Officer Singer was never fired simply by theorising the Department of Magical Law Enforcement were as unfit, unintelligent and incapable as the forces from the Victorian Metropolitan Police.

But it's later found out the locals felt very differently:

People trusted her, relied on her. They felt safe whenever she's near and all have nothing but praises for her.

Imagine the potential - the level of public outrage and betrayal - among the common folk, that the person who was supposed to defend them has been aiding the Ashwinders extorting, threatening and bullying them this whole time, possibly allowing said group access to all the needed private information to terrorise them even further (e.g. their names, private residences, workplaces and occupations, and all that of their loved ones, too)

This can easily be backed up by Natty’s questline: A Basis for Blackmail

We meet a few of the victims - targeted by Theophilus Harlow, another notorious Ashwinder leader and Rookwood’s right hand man - most notably Mr Isko Rabe and his wife.

Harlow knew their names, where Mrs Rabe worked (Gringotts), what she and her husband do for a living (bank security and curse breaker) and where they lived (to plant the threatening note and destroy their garden). Both careers are as high profile as they are dangerous, so it’s not surprising Mrs Rabe was approached about extorting the bank itself. What is disquieting was that their private homes were infiltrated a little too easily, especially concerning her husband is a talented curse-breaker.

Interestingly, Mrs Rabe and officer Singer were likely colleagues (as per the cutscene of the first Hogsmeade troll attack, you can see Mrs Rabe following closely behind Singer). Someone with Singer’s position would have all the necessary connections and know-how to learn all she needs to someone of lower rank, especially when divulging them to a powerful gang leader she may had been conspiring with…

—

I got so excited because I was convinced there would be a twist of some sort, where we may get to pull a Houdini or a Scooby-Doo then unmask Singer as another sleazy dark witch that's been undercover and lying to the locals for years, secretly exploiting with Rookwood and manipulating the same people she's meant to protect.

I was so mentally prepared for the scandal, already so gleefully imagining the reactions of the villagers, the teachers or students from the sheer betrayal after speaking so highly of her and putting so much trust in that woman.

Imagine my disappointment when I find that she really was just hilariously incompetent 😂

Shit, even MC themselves pointed this out ( after local businesses were being extorted and a student was just kidnapped by a group of adults:

I can always incorporate this post in the fic, that'd be fun.

[superbellsubways]

keep thinking about wtf kind of office job my computery gijinka guys even work for .. i was thinking some paper company but then I realized wait .thats literally just The Office.

[creepyjirachi]

okay hear me out. i know i love science and i’m very good at chemistry and physics. but what if i became a fucking accountant

[morsmortish]

share the bartybella office au thoughts to your legion of devoted fans 🙏

oh the bartybella office au thoughts run DEEP. it feels like everytime i think of them my brain drifts over to picturing barty, dressed in an unironed white shirt and rumpled navy suit trousers, draped over the side of bella’s cubicle, trying to be Smooth And Suave until she almost successfully manages to staple his fingers together and sends him toppling to the floor in a panicked escape, whilst she laughs in her typical maniacal way. the first post about this au is here, but it’s taken much more shape since then.

i’m thinking about them at an office christmas party…bella is in a black (VERY LOW CUT!!!) evening dress with a slit all the way up her leg and pointy heels and diamond earrings and thick eyeliner and she just looks so fucking great. and then there’s barty. who rocks up in his battered old toyota forty minutes late in a pair of ripped jeans that are more hole than fabric and a tattered old heavy metal band shirt that has a stain from 2016 on it. bella takes one look at him as he stands awkwardly in the doorway, all gangly limbs, and marches over, dragging him by the ear to the bathroom where she proceeds to yell at him for his lack of formal attire and Repeatedly Maims Him with the plastic cutlery she had just moments ago been using to eat the trifle brought by molly weasley. he’s trying to shield his face from her lethal use of the spoon, but he’s also grinning and continuously making remarks that are fully intended to Rile Her Up because this sick twisted weirdo of a man is somehow enjoying himself FAR too much. (bella is also having a blast and she hates it because how has this sleazeball of a human being barely out of his teenage years managed to become one of the best parts of her job????)

i know i said in my last post that nothing would ever actually happen between them, but barty fucking junior is a stubborn little shit and if he wants to seduce his hot much older supervisor? he will seduce his hot much older supervisor, and nothing i say will be able to stop him. barty has his nepotism-hire internship for a year and even his most valiant attempts (terrible pick up lines and making his teams profile picture an ab pic) aren’t be enough for bella to stoop that low, but after? when they meet again, somewhere, somehow? you can bet she is finally caving into her desire to be worshipped by him. and then there’s something addictive about the way he makes her feel like the most important person in the world, the way she knows he is at her beck and call, the way she finally gets to experience what power feels like. and she can’t give him up after that, even if there was any world in which he would let her go.

[lensdeer]

working with microsoft products is so fucking miserable I have never felt less in control of what I'm doing

like bro why even bother offering an "embed on your site" option if you're gonna demand user sign-in anyways? why did I have to manually fuck with URL query strings to create a direct download link? IF YOUR EMBED SUCKS SO MUCH WHY WON'T YOU LET ME DO IT MANUALLY WITH <object type=application/pdf data=""> AND THE DDL LINK AAAAAAAAAAA

I guess even if I waste multiple days working on this it's still faster than putting up with GoDaddy's dumbass limitations for uploaded files

[hydnes]

i love fear and hunger fans

[msburgundy]

i think we could drastically cut down on stupid takes about """capitalism""" if we popularized the term "knowledge work"

[hecho-a-mano]

we should have testosterone and estrogen dispensers at office jobs just like we got coffee machines in 'em. "Just gonna go get some T pills with John from accounting, wanna come :D?"

[vilnan]

do you ever think about what kind of lives your dragon age ocs had if they lived in a modern AU

[variousqueerthings]

started just telling job'n'benefits related stuff that i'm disabled. used to tiptoe around it and talk about how certain work-spaces "might" be a bit much, because I get too tired and overwhelmed (because they kept saying I should go work in hotels, hotels!!!!), and they'd give me some of this odd modern "oh we just need a good change of attitude, believe in yourself" nonsense that's really just repackaged "stop being a lazy cashdrain" rhetoric.

so now I tell them straight: if I work for 4 hours on one day in a stressful environment, then I will need the whole of that day to prepare for it and the whole of next day to recover because I will be too exhausted, so I will have lost out on two days for four hours of work and then I make them agree with me that that isn't sustainable for a good deal of employment (the simplest version ofc, I know it varies depending on how supportive the environment is, how many breaks I can take, how interesting the work is etc. but they don't need all of that. they don't get it, so I don't tell them).

it's not going to change anything in their systems, because they're all only tuned in to two kinds of work (high physical continuous effort or calling a million people on the phone per day to get yelled at by), but it's at least a little victory watching the job people do a double-take on that piece of information. yeah I'm not just tired like everyone else. I am measurably too tired to do the work you're trying to push on me. now what? nothing? cool, good talk. until in two weeks when we will have the exact same talk.

[dwemers]

I’m so excited I’m like literally shaking

[hella1975]

the boys' first commentary on keating's lessons being cameron and neil saying 'that was weird' / 'but different' is getting to me like the entire film is a narrative on the suffocation of heavy academia and how it prioritises certain subjects (medicine, law, business, engineering) while condemning creativity and passion and how institutions are promoting conformity and grades-over-wellbeing teaching methods more and more as you both move up the elitism scale and as time goes on, and how that was okay for these kids and like so many generations before them they were going to let it happen to them, but one teacher was different. one single teacher told them to seize the day and make their lives extraordinary and he made them look directly at the state of things, and for a little while it was beautiful but they're just kids; how could they ever change things? and sure enough it catches up to them and the institution wins because it always does and suddenly the suffocating thought of what neil is so sure his life is going to be is so daunting and terrifying that he cant even face it

[found--family]

why is there no fic of accountant!cas helping dean with his taxes?

[abstergo-industries-hr]

Good morning Abstergo family!

As a reminder, Abstergo outsources its café and dining services to a third-party contractor. Which we functionally control through shell companies and very specific stock ownership percentages, but for tax and liability reasons we are not responsible for. Complaints about the cleanliness of facilities and quality of refreshments should go to them, not us.

Our new first floor lobby barista, Moussa, has been extremely patient and understanding with patrons, but wishes to remind everyone that neither he nor his predecessor sets the menu and/or the pricing of cafe items. He would also like to stress that the cafe stall currently and has always passed stringent food safety checks, and is in no way related to the food poisoning incident among Sigma Team last week.

Also…I think we may owe the British lobby barista an apology. I don’t think he was that bad at his job—the coffee and snacks being sold just suck. I hope he wasn’t fired or anything because of our complaints.

I hope everyone at Abstergo has a productive and wonderful day!

- Bree from HR

Hastings wasn’t fired. He’s on medical leave, and probably will be for a while. Also, his coffee absolutely sucks, just ask his wife. But, he manages to get amazing intel, so he’ll probably back to work once he’s better. Sorry in advance, but you should really get your coffee somewhere other than a evil corporation.

By the way, if anyone has a problem with Moussa, please come see me. The Assassin in the walls needs someone to stab.

- Clay the Intern, who just happens to hear things.

Moussa is cool. No complaints.

- Intern Jaxon