#ANYWAYS UGH I NEED PRACTICE WITH DIFFERENT THINGS.. 😭😭

[squishosaur]

anyway good morning guys i wanna draw something that isn't the same 4 guys over and over again. beloved followers and mutuals pls tell me about your fav ships or blorbos and i will draw them for you 💞

[mountainficss]

HIHIHIII 🦈 HERE !!! having a wonwoo thoughts again .. (im crazy in love with that man.) but anyways thinking abt him making u wear his glasses while he fucks u cuz it just turns him on ..

or vice versa where he wears his glasses just cuz he likes to see every expression and reaction u have while he fucks u😭😭😭

anyways love u take ur time cuz poopoo bum school is a pain in the ass giving u all these assignments u got important things to do. like writing these fics (super important business!!!) LOVE U 💗

-🦈🦈🦈

!! mentions of: unprotected sex

HIHIHI ANON I MISSED YOU AND I LOVE YOU SM! 🩶🩶🩶 no and honestly i feel you wonwoo is so pretty…i have the fattest crush on him it’s unhealthy. and omg i know school is so lame 🙄 it’s never even hard work it’s just sooo time consuming. i’m telling you my professors want me to be bored out of my mind. but anyway!

ohhh the idea of wonwoo being turned on by you wearing his glasses is so…UGH i love that. you’d probably just snatch them off his face for fun, running away with them and sliding them on to see his reaction. you’d smile at him widely and you’d be met with an astounded look from wonwoo. he would know you took them just to mess around and had an innocent intent, but oh seeing you in his glasses would turn him ON. his brain would flash him an image of you underneath him wearing nothing but his glasses, and he would feel his cock immediately stiffen in his pants. he’d hastily make his way over to you and pick you up, practically throwing you over his shoulder and carrying you to your shared bedroom. in seconds wonwoo would be tearing off your clothes, giving you needy kisses while you let out dreamy sighs. his glasses would still sit cutely on the end of your nose, and your eyes would meet his through the lenses with a dazed look. he felt like he was going insane seeing you looking so cute in his glasses. and your bare body would just make his cock throb harder. “keep them on,” he’d command breathlessly, tugging his shirt over his head and untying his sweats. “’m gonna fuck you while you wear those.” you’d smile devilishly at him as he fishes his cock out of his boxers, twisting his hand around it and throwing his head back in pleasure. “do i look cute in them?” you’d tease, reaching a hand up to adjust them playfully. wonwoo would groan as he peered down at you, fisting his cock faster at your actions. “you look so good,” he’d sigh, feeling you wrap your legs around him and pull him closer. “need to feel you.” he’d line his length up to your hole, pushing in slowly as both of you gasp at the stretch. he’d bottom out in one thrust, your tight heat making him feel dizzy. he’d study your face as he gives you time to adjust, admiring the soft blush on your cheeks and your cute expressions as he starts to rut into you. his cock always made you feel so full, and this time would be no different as he glides easily into you. he’d cup your cheek with one hand and you’d wrap both of your hands around his forearm, turning your head to teasingly kiss his palm. he mutters a small fuck and runs his thumb along the temple of his glasses, feeling you tighten around him. “can i take these back, baby?” he’d ask, his voice strained from trying to hold back his quickly-approaching orgasm. “need to see you. wanna see the faces you make.” you’d chuckle at him asking for permission as if they weren’t his glasses, releasing his arm to take them off. you’d slide them back on his face slowly, watching the moment he seems to really see you. his pupils would dilate at the sight of your lewd expressions, and he’d struggle to not roll his eyes back in ecstasy at the way you look at him. his hips would pound into you with quick thrusts, repeatedly hitting your sweet spot and bringing you closer to climax. “you’re so pretty,” he’d mumble mindlessly, leaning in to press a kiss onto your forehead. “really like when you wear my glasses.” you’d thread your fingers through his hair, gripping the strands as your orgasm washes over you in a powerful wave, threatening to send wonwoo over the edge too. he fucks you through your climax, feeling his cock pulsing inside of your heat and filling you full of his cum with a drawn-out moan. he’d hover over your weak form as you both try to catch your breath. “well,” you’d pant, releasing your grip on his hair and running your fingers through it to soothe the sting. “i like when you wear them too.” <3

taglist: @imprettyweird , @jeonghanpill , @bangantokchy , @caratboy , @bewoyewo , @c-hanniehae , @wonvsmile , @haolovre , @aaniag

[allaboutnayeli]

Omg fic idea I NEED but can't do

Reader is a teacher in a kindergarten and elisa comes and surprises her with lunch. She introduces elisa to the class and the little girls go crazy all over elisa because they have a crush on her 😭😭

(I really need to study ap bio 💔)

kindergarten painted hearts [e.de almeida x art teacher!reader]

prompt: elisa surprises you by bringing your forgotten lunch to your job and it seems some kiddos gained their first crush.

author notes: this plot is actually so cute tho like ugh elisa with kids>> anyways hope you like this bestie! (and you need to lock in on that studying fr).

you and elisa met nearly fourteen years ago. with you both playing at the same youth club in y'all's hometown. football at the time was just a way for you to fill your schedule after school and on the weekends. you were an energetic kid, so your parents decided you needed to work out some of the energy with athletics. meanwhile, you could tell football was an passion for elisa. the first day you saw her show off her defensive skills at practice, you just knew she would go far; and that she did.

you two became best friends after a while of playing together. getting ice cream after practice or games, sleepovers that one of you always begged your parents for, being separated at practice because y'all distracted each other, and more became a part of you two's blooming friendship. eventually that friendship turned into something more. with elisa being the one to ask you out at your highschool graduation party. it was nearing the end of the party with elisa laying on your bed. her eyes half focused up at the ceiling and half focused looking at you sitting beside her. you were looking at some turkish telenovela on your tv.

"uh, y/n?" she murmurs, barely audible. still you hear her, looking down at her with a smile.

"yeah, eli?" she bites down slightly on her lip as you speak out the words. god her heart was racing and she swear she could feel her palms starting to sweat. "not that it matters or anything, but.. do you like girls?" elisa asks. closing her eyes in slight embarrassment the moment you narrow your eyes at her.

the embarrassment fades once she hears you say, "yeah. do you?"

elisa feels a string of confidence go through her as she sits up. scooting back so she is shoulder to shoulder with you. "you already know the answer to that," her head is turned so her nose is touching the tip of yours. "mhm. i just wanted to confirm.." you say softly. your eyes looking into hers. the nervousness elisa was feeling is so evident in her eyes that it almost makes you giggle.

"i hope i'm not reading this all wrong, but.. can i kiss you?" she asks, licking her lips. you don't even give her a response back. just pulling her into a kiss as your hands go to hold onto the back of her neck.

yeah, that was elisa and yours first kiss. that kiss led to you two now being a loving, committed relationship.

after graduation you proceeded to forget about your soccer days and put all your energy into your university. long days filled with studying in an elementary education major with an art minor. being creative was a passion that had been simmering inside of you for years, it was your calling so after getting you college degrees, you went and became a kindergarten school art teacher. that entire time elisa was by your side. supporting you in your studies. and you were supporting her too. elisa went into professional women's football just like you thought. the defender spent some time at different clubs before eventually landing a contract with paris saint germain, her current home away from home. you were there the entire time; coming to games, bringing her snacks to practice, and massaging elisa's body after a long day of training.

now you two are happily engaged and planning a wedding. your relationship is known to the public, but is kept quite private in general with you just wanting things to be kept simple.

your students at your school obviously knew you were engaged to someone. the decently sized diamond ring on your finger is an automatic attention grabber for a bunch of five year olds. all they know is that you have a pretty ring and sometimes mention how your wife is sorta chaotic like them sometimes & that's it. you did plan to introduce elisa eventually since some of your students loved football. you felt it would be such a cute moment, but with elisa's busy schedule it was hard to find a good time for her to come in. unknownst to you that moment would come sooner than you thought.

all because you forgot to bring your lunch to work one day.

it was an wednesday which was usually the most chaotic and messy day of the week. it's the middle of the week so the kids are already feeling tired from monday, but excited for the upcoming friday. those two emotions together make for rowdy students who can't seem to focus on anything.

the first half of the day before lunch is exhausting to say the least. one of the newer students, léa, kept refusing to sit next to her bestfriend ameila over "such a big problem." in reality, the little French girl didn't want to sit next to her bestie because ameila shared her breakfast apples with another girl; typical kindergarten friendship jealousy. resolving this problem required you to stage a mini intervention. five year olds are surprisedly stubborn when it comes to apologizing, but it ends well. with the two bestfriends going back to being their usual clingy selfs to each other.

then another problem was a little boy named samir who has been your student since the beginning of the school year. the boy was tall for his age with him reaching your hip and he took advantage of that too many times to count this morning. grabbing toys out of his classmates hands then holding them up above his head, touching things he shouldn't like the glass heart you have on the top of a shelf near your desk (it was a gift for your birthday from your fellow teachers), and constantly taking out toys that would usually be out of someone of his age range's reach. an absolute pain in the ass; even with his adorable big brown doe eyes and little afro. still, an absolute pain.

by the time lunchtime comes around you are wondering why you even picked this career. kindergarteners eat in their classrooms at your school, so you couldn't even escape the little rascals for a single moment but it's all good. usually the students are more quiet and focused on eating than doing something they shouldn't.

you pull out the cart of lunchbags from the closet. calling up the tables by number to come grab their lunchbags. once all the little kiddos have their lunch it's finally time for you to sit down at your desk and enjoy the lunch you packed.

you start to search through your bag, looking for the lunchbag you always bring. remembering that you cooked and packed some fried chicken with fried brown rice with vegetables makes your stomach growl. yeah, you need to find that lunchbag right now.

"what the..?" you mumble to yourself as you come up empty handed. you swear you remembered packing the lunch in your bag the night before, but apparently you didn't.

you stand up, planning to just go ask ms. janie who is the first grade math teacher to come watch your class while you go out and buy some lunch. just as you open the small closet next to your desk to get your coat here comes a knock at the door.

"someone's at the door, ms l/n!" shouts out manon. she's one of the loudest and chaotic kids in the entire class, so you knew the moment she said that all the other little rascals would get hype too. all the kids are not very interested in the door. the knock from before made some of them perk up earlier, but their food and whatever kindergarten level conversations they were having were way more interesting then some knock at the door.

léa and ameila are now gossiping about who could be at the door. "i bet it's mr. walker or ms. bernard!" ameila speculates loudly. her ponytail wearing bestfriend shakes her head in disagreement. "nope. it has to be mr. martin. he said he would bring candy on friday, but maybe he wanted to do it early," léa says.

you just ignore the conversations going amongst your students as you open up the door.

standing there is elisa with your lunchbag in hand. a mischievous smile sitting on her lips, "forgetting something, babe?"

the surprise that comes over makes you stay silent for a moment before fully processing that your fiancee was standing in front of you at your work place. "what are you doing here?" you ask with a smile as you take the bag out of her hand. opening it to look inside and see if it has the right contents inside. "practice was cancelled and when i came home i noticed you left your lunch so i decided to bring it to you since i missed your face," she says. her words make you roll your eyes lovingly.

you can hear your kindergarteners (barely) whispering about who is at the door. with your body covering up most of elisa's as you stand in the doorframe, they couldn't make out who it was.

"that doesn't look like mr. martin," léa says as she tries to sit up more in her seat to catch a glance of who is at the door. ameila does the same thing, "i think it's some boy. maybe that's ms. l/n's son! i knew she had a kid and just wasn't telling us."

you hear everything clearly since kindergarteners are a least good at projecting their voice unlike with whispering. "well come inside and come meet my children away from home," you turn and come more into the classroom. going back over to your desk real quick to set your lunch aside. elisa walks inside and closes the door behind her. the french player's smile grows wider as she look at all the eyes on her.

your students look at her in half confusion and half curiosity. you just know they're going to ask way too many questions. most of which are going be a little too personal. "alright you guys.." you say as you come and stand next to elisa in front of the class. "meet my fiancee, elisa. she's a footballer," the moment you say that the boys in the class look more hype. a few girls as well. especially gabriela who sits with her ronaldo jersey on in the back of the class.

samir is the first to raise his hand. you sigh before signaling him to speak. he smiles as he says, "have you played with mbappe?" the question is innocent enough but it makes elisa laugh. you give her a light slap on the arm and she stops. clearing her throat before saying, "no. girls and boys don't play together at my age," elisa says.

that one question and answer makes all the other little kindergarteners in the classroom want to say their own questions too. with it being only ten minutes left of lunch, you allow elisa to handle all the questions while you go munch on your lunch.

those ten minutes pass quickly as you chew happily on your food. you finish half of it by the time class is supposed to start, so you pack it back away and leave the lunchbag on your desk. a warm smile graces your lips as you look over to see elisa sitting at the back of the classroom with a small group of the girls in the class.

the conversation they are having makes you almost laugh, but you stop yourself. you come over, saying, "it's time to go put your lunchbags up in your backbags girls."

gabriela is the first to groan. pouting as she looks at elisa. "you look strong, elisaaa. can't you put it up for me?" she whines as she pouts at the french player. the sight is adorable but makes you question a few things since gabriela is probably one of the most independent kindergarteners you have ever since. now she wants elisa's help? elisa just smiles at the compliment. patting the five year old's head.

manon and ameila who were also at the table pout at elisa too. five year olds can be quite impressionable at the worse moments. now you have three kindergarteners who don't want to get up and put up something themselves.

"girls, those are your lunch bags not elisa's" you say, but still five year olds are stubborn at times too so the three just continue looking at elisa.

"it's fine, babe" the french player says before standing up. you sigh at her; she was basically going against your words in front of your students and now you just know for the rest of time elisa is here, those three will be listening to her not you. still elisa just shrugs as she grabs the three lunchbags laying on the table. "which backbags are y'all's?" you hear elisa say as you walk back to the front of the class.

you can see the puppy lovesick smile on all three of those kindergarteners faces and knew the rest of class was probably going to be more difficult than usual.

and you were completely right. the whole rest of the class ameila, manon, and especially gabriela trailed behind elisa.

when it was time for math and you were going to hand out the materials, those three wanted elisa to instead. same thing when it was time for science and you were helping everyone get on their experiment gear. gabriela clung to elisa's side and asked her with a pout to help her out. ameila stood on elisa's other side and asked the same thing. both blushing once the french player finished helping them. it was very cute to see and what happened at the end of the day was even cuter.

it was the last few minutes of the day with the kiddos finishing up their art projects. the assignment was to draw something that represents love. gabriela was hyperfocused on hers. making sure to make it way more beautiful than she usually does for art projects.

at the end of the class as you were telling the kiddos goodbye as they one by one got picked up by their parents, gabriela walks up to elisa who's sitting at your desk. Chewing on some gummies you had laying around (they are for children but she really doesn't care). the little girl shyly taps on elisa's thigh. "hm? what is it, gabs?" the french player asks as she sits up a bit, smiling at gabriela.

the little kindergartener's heart was racing so fast as she holds out her little card. It's pink construction paper with a red heart on it. on the heart it says my favorite footballer. "before ronaldo was my favorite but now.. i think i want a elisa jersey," gabriela says. elisa smiles as she accepts the card and pulls the five year old into a small hug. "this is so cute, thank you!" elisa says as she pulls away.

you just smile as you see how happy gabriela looks. she gives elisa a shy wave before grabbing her backbag and coming to the door. you pat her head as you say, "have a good evening, okay, gabs?"

she smiles up at you and shakes her head as her mother approaches the classroom. you speak to her for a few minutes before letting gabriela go. closing the door once she was fully gone. thankfully all the parents were on time today and all the little rascals were gone.

you turn to elisa and smile, "she's totally crushing on you." elisa just shrugs with a smug smile, "can't be helped i guess?"

you come over to your desk, still smiling as you ruffle elisa's hair. she pouts slightly. not enjoying the feeling of her hair being all messy. "always knew she was sorta into girls. i think she has a little crush on ameila," you say.

"oh? so i wasn't her gay awakening?" elisa jokes. you roll your eyes before saying, "oh no you definitely was. you made her realize she may be a little into girls. i bet that tomorrow she will be showing her crush for ameila way more than usual."

and you were correct as the next day gabriela wore a jersey with de almeida on the back and was sharing her snacks with ameila. you caught the two giggling as ameila braided gabriela's hair. an obvious blush sitting on gabriela's face.

[karizard-ao3]

Sex and sexuality is a prevalent theme in NGE, and especially in EoE. What are your thoughts about this?

I've been sitting on this one (and therefore the other asks in my inbox because I like to do them in order) for a few days to see if I could come up with a nice, coherent answer, but, as always, I can't so I must ramble instead.

One of the things I appreciate about the way sex/ sexuality is addressed in NGE/EoE is how messily and amorally it is portrayed, because I feel like that's very realistic. Clearly, it is important to apply morality to sex in practice (like, getting consent, respecting the sexual boundaries of your relationship(s), etc), but internally it's all a sloppy grey area, and sometimes people are going to do questionable things in moments of weakness (ex. try to hook up with an ex's bff who you don't even get along with because you're drunk and still upset about the breakup). And we see that a lot in Evangelion, as well as the characters' conflicting feelings about it.

For instance, Misato. Do I actually think she was attracted to Shinji? No. I think she cared about him very much as a guardian, but when she didn't know how to comfort him/ encourage him, she turned to offering sex. I read someone saying that she sees sex as a source of comfort due to sleeping with Kaji as a way to get over her father's death, which could be true, but I'm not sure that seems quite right to me. I believe she uses it as a tool in some ways. As an escape in others. And as a way to manufacture emotional connectedness in other instances. Sometimes all at once. And we see that she feels conflicted about it as well, because she's not sure if she loves Kaji or is using him. Then, Queen Daddy issues saw her ward in a bad spot and, with everything going to shit around them, she tries to use sex as a tool to motivate Shinji and also show him that she cares about him (even though it was so incredibly inappropriate 😭). Anyway, for Misato, sex is the cure to the hedgehog's dilemma, I suppose!

And then there's Shinji. The only time he seems able to make any kind of advance towards Asuka is when she is asleep, which I do not think is a sign that he is a predator but more an indicator of how deeply pervasive his inability to open himself up to other people is. It is *symbolic*. It's not okay what he did, but I think we are supposed to see it as a symptom of his own self loathing, and that he wants to reach out and touch people but is too afraid to make the move when they are able to perceive him doing it. Shinji masturbating to Asuka's exposed body at the hospital was obviously wrong, but it also seems like the summary of his relationship with her and the version of himself that exists through her. I'm trying to think how to describe it. i've written and deleted so many things. I don't know. Ugh. When she cannot see him, he can finally reveal how desperate he is for her to be with him. She is the one he seeks out when everything goes to shit, although if she were awake, I don't think he could have been so honest about how much he needed her. But she's in a coma so he is free to beg her to wake up, then, when her robe falls open... you know. It's like he's carrying out his half of a relationship in a bubble, without every offering her the chance to join him. And he hates himself for it, just like he hates himself for what he did in her hospital room. He knows masturbating to her unconscious body was wrong. He knows she is more than just jackoff fuel. He know she deserves to actually be held and loved. But he is immobilized by his fear of rejection and how others see him (and also so unbelievably horny because he's a teenage boy). The kiss between him and Asuka is really unfortunate because if either of them had just given the other any kind of indication that it was special to them in any way, I think things would have gone a lot differently. Shinji believes Asuka was just doing it because she was bored and mad about Kaji being out with Misato (right? Am I remembering the circumstances right?), and then, because Shinji just stood there, Asuka believes that Shinji only let her kiss him because she grabbed his nose and forced him, and not because of any affection for her. They were both too afraid to be honest. Maybe if Asuka had been more patient, Shinji would have closed the space and kissed her. Maybe if Shinji had held her, she wouldn't have run away after, screaming about it being a mistake. Maybe it wouldn't have gotten to the point where the hospital scene played out the way it did.

Which brings me to Asuka, who is the last one I will talk about because I think these three are the ones with the more convoluted attitudes towards sex and also this is already getting long. I think Asuka was really profoundly affected by her father finding and hooking up with another woman while her mother was ill (her mother's doctor, no less). I think it gave her the belief that a woman who is able to provide sex is a woman who will receive loyalty and love. She throws herself at Kaji, an adult who she feels safe with and wants the approval of, because, to her, that is the way to secure his affection. When we first meet her, she shows off how big her boobs got. Could that not be her way of announcing that she is lovable? But Kar, you might say, she freaks out about boys looking at her panties and things. To which I say: Yeah. She's 14. She's putting on a show, just like in everything else she does, trying to prove to everyone that she is worthwhile. Look how artlessly she comes on to both Shinji and Kaji. She wants to be seen as sexy and desirable because to her that's a means to an end, which is making sure people have a reason to want her around and notice her. What she really wants to be cherished. If Shinji had been able to show her that he reciprocated her interest/attraction, then I think there would have been a natural progression in their physical relationship. In closing, Asuka exists in a perpetual state of conflict because she demands love in whatever way she thinks the can obtain it, but she does not actually know what the love she needs looks like. I think if someone simply hugged her and stroked her hair and told her how brave she's been, she would sob for a day and a night.

Whew. And, of course, my thoughts might change after I finish my rewatch and eventually get my hands on the rebuild movies and rewatch in the future, but that's where I am on the subject right now. And I didn't even address Shinji and Kaworu. But, I think that whole thing is pretty straightforward. Kaworu pretty much ignores all of Shinji's reservations and showers him in praise and affection and Shinji goes all heart eyes because it's the first time he's felt wanted and he's bi.

[cocozydiaries]

more mha dr asks!!!!!!!!!!

do u have any ideas for your hero costume etc.

anyone you're excited to meet??

any sort of idea on what you look like (physical description ig)

YESS MORE ASKS!! love these sm coz i gotta dig through the depths of my mind to answer them.

question when you guys ask me stuff do you like the overly long answers or should i keep it short? coz like the original answers were wayy longer this is literally me tryna keep it short😭 i actually have a problem

Hero costume:

tbh like most things i’m leaving this one for when i shift there but unlike most things it isn’t coz i want my subconscious to decide. Honestly i do not have the sense of style needed to come up with a good hero fit HOWEVER my drself does!!

i definitely want smth either pink or blue. me and uraraka are gonna be twinin🤭!!

i also know that i want smth kinda flowy. i loooove dresses and i mean i feel like smth flowy would just match my water based quirk yk?

i don’t have any inspo but honestly i’m probably not gonna look very hero like😭

anyways might be kinda odd but i looooove magical girl type of outfits sm! and before y’all go “but that’s so impractical for hero work!” not for me it’s isn’t 🙄

i genuinely did script i have a magical girl type of concept tho but still sorta practical to work in😭

Who i’m excited to meet:

i already know ik them in my dr but i cannot wait to meet my dr family! might be kinda cringe but i actually just might like my family??

i scripted in my cr sibling’s because idk🧍‍♀️. tbh i just can’t imagine being anywhere without them😭

i also can’t wait to meet my cat!! My family adopted a ton of pets because rich people but I specifically ended up with a stray cat i found at the pharmacy.

funnily enough that’s actually smth that happened to me here! except my mumsies said i can’t have the cat so instead the pharmacy took her in but i still get to visit her whenever i go there (she’s so lovely i love her sm!) anyways in my dr i ended up getting to adopt her instead. happy ending yippee.

AND I CANT WAIT TO SEE HER SHES LITERALLY MY BBY☹️ i also scripted (for my own mental health) that pets live wayyy longer now by like 10-20 whole more yrs coz i cannot imagine any of my kids dying before me

if you were wondering the total amount of pets we got a cat, dog, snake, and duck. and like random bird feeder thingies my parents added to the garden. the whole food chain ong

ig i’m also excited to meet up with some old childhood friends? Genuinely asking tho would it be weird to meet up with someone you used to be really close friends with but haven’t seen in a few years😭? Me and my drself are both baffed.

AND OCHAKO ML🫶🫶 i’m gonna meet her at UA probably BUT I HOPE I MEET HER BEFORE THAT TBH😭 but trust we’re gonna be besties

i scripted i’m super good at baking coz she mentioned she likes sweet stuff so i’m gonna spoil her with all sweet stuff i make😈 devious plan

Appearance stuff:

since this is a safe space… i feel i should share that i did in fact change my appearance. I don’t have a specific face claim (i wanna be surprised tbh) but mostly i just changed some of my facial features to their best version. looksmaxxingcore unironically i fear💔

i scripted that my face looks pretty and whatnot (in a very like unique way coz ugh she’s so different and quirky and unique🙄) but i still look and feel familiar to myself.

Also idk if you guys have heard that theory but like apparently after spending enough time with someone you start to look like them? Ik that theory generally means like clothes and aesthetic rather than actual facial features but i did script that even tho me and my siblings are adopted we somehow look similar to each other and our parents.

But the biggest change is probably my hair. in a reality where i can have any hair colour and you think i’m not going pink?

anyways i scripted that i have like pink streaks of hair in my otherwise black hair!! gonna match so well with my hero outfit!

smth like this!!

tbh it doesn’t matter coz i do dye my hair often so i’m probably gonna end up with a ton of different hair colours anyways

aside from that my hair is still its lovely curly self! i love my curls and never wanna get rid of them but i did script if i like straighten my hair that it STAYS straight even if i sweat and whatnot. i haaaaate when you get those curly little wisps peeking through coz of that😭

anyways that’s all for now! i love answering asks sm so this was real fun but i also love hearing about ur mha drs SO TAG ME IF YOU POST ABOUT THOSE

[charmedreincarnation]

What you said about the law is so REAL. My friend was super into the law before I was. And my mom was into law of attraction when I was in elementary school and would tell me our thoughts hold power and she would talk about manifesting. And I didn’t care for it tbh 😭 I was kind of into my own way of manifesting. Tbh I probably just ran away from accountability 💀💀 But then IDEK what happened, it was like a light switch flipped and I started using the law and believed in it. I think it found me when I needed and was ready for it

I was utilizing the law when I was like 5. Thinking about reincarnation when I was 10, even though I was avidly Christian ! even my non Loa friends, Especially as children lowkey all utilized the law in one way ot another without realizing. Then as I got into it I started finding it in everyday people for it to be more real, and realistic for my journey to apply it to myself.

The dude who sleeps throughout class but still manages to get the best score everytime. The law

The girl who never takes track practice seriously, but gets first place at the meets. The law

The dude who realistically shouldn’t have as many friends and a love life yet, som how even manages to not surprise you with their charisma. The law

Those pathological liars (my girl sza I’m sorry) who lie about everything thing but it starts to manifest into their own life for no reason. Bruh the law. it’s here and people use it without knowing all the time. Genuinely almost everyone, even if they’re not conscious about it.

People can use it negatively too

I had a friend who had super strict parents. Even stricter than my traditional African and Latina parents. I also had another friend with super strict parents, same as friend one, but different experience

Friend 1: never asked to go out bc parents would say no. Never snuck out, never tried or wanted to go out because what’s the point, “they’ll say no anyways” then she’d say oki I’m going to ask them today, and would decide to give up on the bus ride home before even seeing her parents.

Friend 2: same family different assumption. When people ask her how she’s coming out she responded “I’ll find a way.” If I told her, how her parents always say no.. she would say “ not this time or why would they” even tho I knew who her parents were and what they would say. They always ended up saying yes.

A lot of us on our journey are friend one.” I can’t get into the void, I’m probably the only one who can’t so what the point my 3D sucks waa waa.”

“I’m going to live my desired life tomorrow Fr! (8:00pm) “ugh my meditation didn’t work, this shit is fake”

“Y’all don’t know my story, I’ve never succeeded in manifesting but I swear I’m living in the end”

(Exaggeration obvi for comedic effects🙄)

Because you’re already giving up before you try, and assuming it won’t 😭💗 lesson of the story, be friend 2 👍

[kamiversee]

okay, i calmed down a bit. holy shit what a chapter. this chapter is possibly one of the most intense chapters you've posted yet, if not the most. the only other chapters that immediately come to mind in terms of emotional intensity are the ones including Gojo's tearful confession and the chapter with the "last kiss." this chapter devastated me on a completely different level. the drama had me reeling and i loved it so fucking much. well done, Kami. really well done.

i'm going to try to not sound like a broken record since you already know my immediate thoughts based off of my past few anons 😭 it's so interesting that Choso immediately goes to call Geto's brother shitty, yet later on in the chapter Geto refers to them at friends. Choso's denials are believable since he does seem like a major introvert and only really goes out of his way to socialize with the reader, but i wonder if we'll ever meet Kenjaku in this fic. or is this a sneak peak as to who we may meet in a certain sequel...? 👀👀👀 KAMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!! why do i feel like you're going to draw some parallels between Suguru and his brother's relationship to Choso's relationship with Sukuna. i'm not sure how it would go, but if you do choose to do that i feel like it would floor me.

i love that this chapter is unveiling so much of Choso's toxicity holy shit. i know it's all related to his possessive nature, but the anger issues had me taking breaks and walking laps in my room at 1:30 am on a work night. the way he's upset about things we aren't even aware of (how "flirtatious" we come off in a regular conversation) was expected but the way it built up to him exploding was just *chef's kiss*. the way still calls us little pet names, especially after that huge fight, stung me.

not only did this chapter reveal so much about Choso, but it really does solidify how toxic the reader is for him as well. there's no such thing as a perfect character (even though these jjk men get so close) but this was a perfect reminder that despite everything, the reader has her own red flags to work through as well. will she ever? probably not bc holy shit that passage was so perfect and needed. also, who wouldn't act that way in that kind of situation 😭 swatting OUR hand away when HE is the one causing the scene? omfg it got me so mad LMFAOOOO

also the reveal that Sukuna is a physically abusive asshole? omfg. it makes sense for his character but still, the contrast of that info to how we knew him is intense. it's a shame that he's so fucking hot 😭😭😭 with the things he's done, i understand why Choso has the feelings he does. but holy shit dude, the reader didn't know 😭 why tf is he taking it out on her 😭😭😭

Suguru that motherfucker. i hate now smart and intentional he is with every fuckin' action he does in this series. UGH. the way he had me cringing (in a good way) to the point of having to take breathing breaks after practically every line. especially when he said "Go after him, idiot."

KAMI. YOU 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵 OH MY GODDDDD. IF IT WASN'T OBVIOUS THAT WHAT THE READER IS TO CHOSO, GOJO IS TO THE READER, HOLY SHIT. YOU'RE PRACTICALLY POINTING A NEON-LIGHT ARROW TOWARDS THAT PARALLEL. such a genius way to reuse that line. once i read that, it fucking clicked. the same fucking line Geto says to Gojo in chapter 8 after their first big fight. oh my fucking God Kami. reading that made me have to put down my phone and stare at the ceiling for a bit. so fucking well done. it's lowkey so funny how Geto has been there for so many of the big fights. i'm so fucking excited to see how this develops. my brain is so fried once again.

- ☃️

Smirks. Chat, it’s time for another Kami yap session, LETS GOOOO

1. Gojo’s breakdown chapters & the chapter where Choso leaves (chapter 19 I think) were one of the only chapters that made me tear up while I wrote them😭 Well, aside from the next one I’m abt to drop- ANYWAYS THOUGH, glad you enjoyed it like always ^.^

2. See, here’s the thing about Kenjaku’s mentioning, he was only brought up to show two things; One, Choso has friends and a life outside of the reader, and Two, Choso and Geto have more of a connection/knowledge of each other than what might’ve been expected :)

It’s also another slight anime reference bc like I’ve said previously, I do tend to mirror things such as friend groups or actions to the way things are done in the anime & Choso’s appearance was always made with Kenjaku so, why not make that a factor here yk?🤷‍♀️

3. There actually are already some parallels ^.^

Notice how Choso calls Kenjaku shitty & Suguru snaps back by saying Choso’s brother (Sukuna obv) isn’t any better. Then, you also have Yuki who points out that both men haven’t told the reader anything about these terrible brother’s of theirs, despite both men having connections & intimate moments with her.

It’s kinda meant to show that there is a lot the reader simply doesn’t know. That was honestly somewhat the point of the past few drama chapters! There’s a list of things she learns all in the span of one day, from Gojo’s obsession to Sukuna being abusive— she learned all of that within a single day.

Anywho, the parallel is simply that the men who she claims as her type both have done similar things to her in regards to opening up🤷‍♀️

4. I wanna note that a lot of people are calling Choso’s actions here toxic. Now, I’m not going to disagree of course but, I will just say, his moment of blowing up isn’t unnatural. Choso’s not the best with his feelings, as we can see, and imagine you’re in his shoes for a moment.

How would you react to everything he was just told? Do you think you wouldn’t have blown up as he did? Especially when you consider how passionate he is about his brothers, more specifically, Yuji.

Just wanted to throw that out there! Yes, he shouldn’t have yelled the way he did but this is something that’d been building up & because he’s such an introvert (I am too ngl) it’s not unusual for him to have a sudden outburst as he did seeing as he typically keeps his thoughts and emotions inside rather than wearing them on his sleeve :)

5. Yep, I want people to understand that she herself is not perfect in anyway. The reader just gaslit the hell out of Choso & played on the fact that he believes she knew nothing about Sukuna.

NOW before y’all jump on our mc, while it is toxic & bad, she only does that for the benefit of everyone if you think about it. I said this earlier but she has learned a shitload of info in one day. With that, she’s just as stressed and tensed as Choso is atm so she uses her situation in order to manipulate Choso into telling her the truth about everything.

Think about it, she could never manipulate Gojo into telling her his truth and as said, the last thing she wanted was to go through that again, especially with someone like Choso who typically tells her everything.

Yes, yes it is bad that she did that but in a way, it was for something positive such as forcing Choso to open up to her. Not only that, it also gives her a path to reveal other things to him ^.^

6. Again, Choso didn’t exactly mean to blow up on her but he’s been tense the entire time so it was bound to happen. He’s not blaming her, he’s just upset and is unsure of how to properly express tht as we can see💀

And I think I said this to a few anons so far but, who knows the last time Choso & Sukuna interacted with one another? Given that & based on what the reader experienced, we don’t know how long ago Choso saw Sukuna be abusive to women, now Yuji on the other hand is different ofc because Choso clearly states Yuji’s current age and that kinda shows that tht abuse is ongoing.

7. When I tell you, I WAS SMILING SO HARD AS I WROTE TS. I LOOOOOOOOOOOVE making parallels so I literally went back to the chapter with Gojo & Geto just to recall what Geto said to him and then I was like “Yup, time to reuse this shit😈”

AHH I LOVE DOING THT SM UGHHH

But yesyes;

Gojo —> Reader —> Choso

It’s so perfect too ^.^

Ty for reading, mwah, ily <33

[gurugirl]

Hey Guru! I hope I’m not bugging you. I need relationship advice. Have you ever heard of the American Pastor Steven Anderson. Well, I know his nephews. They go to school with me, or they went to school with me. Now they are going to Bob Jones University. Anyway, I really liked one of them. But then he said he didn't like catholics and wasn't allowed to talk to me anymore because his parents said they don't want him to have a relationship with a catholic. I’m really upset. I wish he would just talk to me. I wish there was any way to communicate with him. But the only way that will happen is if I see him in person. I am trying to convince my parents to let me go to BJU for college. But my parents do not really like how strict that school is. What are your thoughts on everything? They are really cute. I can send a pic if you want.

Ugh 😑 Okay so I had to look this pastor up and that college and hon… I cannot tell you what to do or what to believe but if you go to that college I would imagine you’d be miserable (I would be).

Not only are some of their rules very odd and concerning they seem to have been openly racist (based on their past policies) and they are forcing super conservative fundamentalist religious practices on their students and disciplinary action if you don’t comply. Girls are treated differently than the guys, aren’t allowed to wear pants (???????), and no dancing bc it’s sinful.

Girl… don’t do it. It’s not worth it. No guy is worth it. You’re young and you deserve a positive college experience and you’ll meet someone else who’s probably more on your wavelength. If these guys are going to BJU I wonder if they agree with some of the more problematic ideals and if so, if I were you, I wouldn’t want to have anything to do with these boys at all. That’s just me.

Also you could face expulsion for looking at this side of tumblr and reading fic if anyone found out 😭

It sounds like you’d be in a prison 😵 I wouldn’t do it. I’d stay away from boys that liked/agreed with this kind of thing, which it sounds like they do after what he said about you being catholic. Even BJU made a post saying Catholicism is a cult so I have a feeling that boy believes that too.

I say stay as far away from that boy and that college as you can! Not worth it ❌

Xoxo

[kaneydas]

was watching akira for a second time and the wave of kaneda obsession hit me like a truck and now i can’t get enough of him :((( it’s scary how there is virtually NOTHING out there like yes ik the movie is like 30 years old but cmon guys

anyway ‘m thinking of kaneda who is so in love with you but doesn’t know how to say it and knows he doesn’t express it enough so he tries so so hard but ends up embarrassing himself that it’s cute :( he gets all frustrated when he stumbles over his words

rightttt, I’m with you, it’s really weird that there’s literally nothing out there tbh. also kaneda is <3333 so I don’t blame you. I present to u this weird scenario thing-y… not sure if its exactly what u wanted😭 (it should probably be longer too but oh well)

Kaneda could, after some overdue self-reflection, admit that he was a lot of things. Arrogant, reckless, stubborn – but in the end; the one thing no one could accuse him of being was a coward. At least, that’s what he thought. But then, he sees you one day, you’re pressing down on his wounds with a cotton swab drenched in antiseptic, looking up at him through your lashes, and suddenly his heart can’t stop pounding in his ears.

You ask him what happened, how did he get hurt, did he get into a fight again? Kaneda doesn’t answer at first, eyes focused on your face, unmoving. Then your lips, and he can’t stop thinking about how much he wants to press his own against them until they bruise. Until you’re gasping for air.

But he doesn’t, and he doesn’t understand why. Instead he laughs and tells you he tripped, and you clearly don’t believe him, but decide against pressing further into the matter.

Kaneda doesn’t hesitate, most people know that much. He doesn’t know why it’s different around you, though, he can’t get you out of his mind ever since that day. He can’t be with you, it makes him nervous but he can’t be without you either, it makes him feel even worse.

Actually, what makes him feel the worst, is when you decide to give the tiniest bit of attention to anyone else. And so, when he practically pulls you away mid-conversation from Tetsuo one day, you’re taken aback to say the least, not to mention annoyed.

”What’s your issue?” You question, arms crossed, and Kaneda doesn’t seem too happy either. ”We were talki-”

”Well, don’t talk to him! He’s a loser,” Kaneda grumbles, and you know his words harbor no ill intent towards his best friend, he’s just grumpy (for whatever reason). ”Just talk to me, alright?”

”Were you jealous?” You ask, all your previous annoyance suddenly gone. ”You’ve been distant lately, I thought that… I don’t know…”

”Well, uh, y’know,” he stumbles, cursing himself slightly for it. ”Just been busy lately, y’know how it is…”

”Really? Is that all?” You continue to prod. ”You’re not mad are you? You can tell me anything, you know that.”

He wants to curse your kindness, how do you tell someone you’ve been avoiding them because you love them too much?

Don’t be a coward, Kaneda, he tells himself.

”It’s nothing, really,” he assures and a moment of silence passes. ”Uh, you know that I care about you, right?”

”Um,” you pause, taken aback. It’s not like him to be so… emotionally forward. ”I care about you, too,” you smile.

”And I-I, I like you a lot.” He continues and you nod, slowly.

”I like you, too. You know you’re one of my best friends.” You reply, clearly confused.

”Ugh, not like-” he hesitates before covering the lower part of his face, which was an uncharacteristic shade of red, with his hand. ”Do you really need me to fucking say it?”

”Say what?” You smile, suddenly understanding the situation. What an idiot, you think, good thing he’s cute. He seems to turn even redder under your gaze.

”Listen, okay, I love you… Fuck, you happy now?” He says, averting his eyes from yours. ”So if you don’t feel the same, just tell me, alright? It’s fine-”

”God, you’re stupid, you know that?” You laugh, your own face slightly red, as well. ”Just… will you hold me?”

”Uh,” he stumbles, again, as he processes your words and suddenly, it’s as if your old, cocky Kaneda comes back when a smile spreads on his lips. ”I’ll do you one better, sweetheart.”

He pulls you in by the waist, arms somewhat shaky, and he presses his lips against yours – strangely clumsy and unpracticed. The heat of his face radiates against yours and you can’t help but wish you could melt into each other.

Maybe he’s not a coward after all.

[vampireimiko]

𝐤𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐨 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 !!

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬, nothing but fluff <3

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞, this would've been a oneshot but i didn't really have it in me to write a one

⬤ okay so, with hawks being a pro hero and such, you two didn't really get to go on many dates without people interrupting to ask for his autograph

⬤ don't get me wrong, the man loves his fans and attention but he was with his s/o and wanted time with you alone !

⬤ he felt really bad because you two could never really be able to have a proper date where it was just you two :(

⬤ he briefly remembered how you mentioned wanting to go to the fair with him

⬤ so hawks decided to rent out a WHOLE fair just for the two of you

⬤ ugh rich people 🙄

⬤ but no fr it was such a sweet thing for him to do

⬤ so fast forward to you guys' date, it was amazing !!

⬤ you guys rode bumper cars, did those huge swing thingys and eventually ended up on a rollercoaster

⬤ and too your surprise keigo was scared of them ???

⬤ "YOU LITERALLY FLY HOW ARE YOU SCARED OF ROLLERCOASTERS ?!"

⬤ "YEAH BUT NOT THIS FAST."

⬤ after the ride was over you started laughing hella hard at him💀

⬤ and the whole time he was like :(( and after that you apologized and kissed him, still laughing a bit at him <33

⬤ "I'm sorry baby, I'll make it up to you when we get home. But first let's get cotton candy, ride the ferris wheel and then we can go home !! " you beamed at him

⬤ when he heard that damn comment about making it up to him at home best believe he RAN to the cotton candy booth

⬤ "I NEED TWO COTTON CANDYS, PLEASE HURRY AS FAST AS YOU CAN."

⬤ nigga??? calm down 😟

⬤ but anyways after you two got the cotton candy, keigo practically dragged you too the ferris wheel😭

⬤ "SLOW DOWN, IM GONNA FALL."

⬤ when you two got too the ferris wheel keigo felt like he was literally vibrating ⬤ ???

⬤ "Finally we're going slow now 🙄 " you said eyeing him from the side ⬤ "I'm sorry, let's just enjoy this for now." He said coming behind you and grabbing your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder ⬤ the view you two were getting was immaculate

⬤ all the city lights were hitting your skin perfectly ✨

⬤ DONT even get me started on how the moonlight was hitting you, my gawd ⬤ "Shit, I can't wait to get you home. Your literally glowing right now."

⬤ "Why thank you baby 😊 "

⬤ when that ride was over best believe he picked you up in his arms and FLEW to the car.

⬤ guess he really wanted to see what you had in store for him at home, but that was a different story for a later time <33

𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ; this was rushed if you can tell💀 but nevertheless enjoy. also if you liked this don't be shy to ask for more <33

𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧

[lovehimeri]

WARNING : horror , stalking , blackmail , threatning , character death , dark themes , gruesome details , gore

Tbh the inspiration for this was a song..I didn't plan to post creepy stuff on this account as it was just for cute stuff but oh well 😭 creepy alkaloid fanfic with some hiiai angst ig!

In this world , it's common knowledge that the strong eat the weak. Ever since he's  been a young one , he was taught to always know his place. Through the years , he learned that not everything adults say is true~he developed his own special way of thinking..But what happens when fright and terror turns into something else...? A weapon , one way to destroy everything he ever cherished .

The streets were dyed with a crimson color. The sound of chattering red leaves rustling in the wind was comforting~as some people might say . Fall is everyone's favourite season , isn't it? Is there even anything slightly better than piles of shimmering leaves gathered neatly, the fresh smell of wet grass after a long night of rain , the warm taste of hot cinnamon cocoa , the dark figure lurking in the shadows , waiting for the perfect moment to strike and swing a thick , metal axe at their poor prey..

"You barely ate anything! I'm not keeping up with this new routine anymore , Aira!"

"Moooom! I'm an idol now , I need to watch what I eat!" The little boy quickly puts on his shoes and hugs his mom , who hugs him back with a long sigh .

"Be careful on your way to school . There have been reports of people going missing these days..I don't mind if you walk with some friends , but straight from school to home , got it?" The woman spoke with a slight shake to her voice . Her son fails to match her worried expression as he grins and opens the door .

"You always worry so much mom , I'll just walk home with hiiro-kun!" Aira runs out and shuts the door behind him . 

'Waaaaaah! The trees are really giving their all this season! So pretty!' 

He loved admiring the scenery on his way to school . Aira was lucky to be able to see the beauty in many things , and only the bright side of the world . After all , he was just a young , innocent boy..

"Good morning!"

"GYAAAH!! HIIRO-KUN—you scared the life out of me! Did your parents never teach you to not sneak up on people from behind?! Especially when they're focused in something!" 

"Sorry , I'm sorry—you can let your anger all out on me like you always do!" The red head gives a cheeky grin , like he always does when he gets scolded by aira .

"No...that sounds like bullying! I do not bully people" Aira crosses his arms .

"Right..hiiro-kun , do you mind if we walk home together? My mom says people are going missing recently , I tried to shake it off but I do feel uneasy just thinking about being followed—that's kinda why I was scared when you came up behind me.." The boy anxiously rolls a piece of his hair in his fingers .

"Of course! Don't worry Aira , I went through a lot of special martial arts practice back in my hometown. I am fully capable of protecting you if anyone tries to steal you! Though I think no one should..I like having Aira by my side , so if anyone tries to take you away from me , I might have to severely injure them!"

"Sheesh , Hiiro-kun! You can't say things like that! it sounds reeeeally creepy!"

"But wouldn't it be creepier if someone takes you against your will? Wouldn't you feel so scared without me , Aira?" 

The blond boy looks down , thinking deeply.

"We arrived at school anyway! We're in different classes , but if you feel unsafe , you should call me! I will always be able to find you with my special senses!" 

Aira feels at ease when he's around hiiro .

"Teehee , alright , if that's what you want . Don't forget we'll walk home together later!" Aira giggles as he runs off to class . 

"Good morning , Ai-chan!" One of his classmates greets him as he walks through the door . Instead of a smile , he frowns . 

"Ugh , I told you not to call me that" Aira places his bag on the side hanger and sits next to his friend .

"It just suits you nicely! You're so lucky , you're popular and everyone loves you.."

"What's with the sudden switch? You don't seem so happy.." 

The other boy rests his face in his palms , as he looks sweaty and anxious.

"I'm just..really worried about you . You've heard about the missing reports lately , haven't you?" 

The blond boy nods.

"Well...my dad was watching the news this morning , I happened to pass by him and heard something on the tv . the police found 3 bodies out of the 10 missing cases , and all 3 of them belonged to popular idols..and the photos they showed...I don't think you should know about this either"

"No please! You gotta tell me , you can't just stop here" aira begs his friend to tell him more.

"I'm sorry if you get nightmares later then..here's the website , scroll down a little and you'll see the photos..but don't throw my phone in panic!" The boy hands aira his phone with the website on the main page , aira shakily takes the phone and scrolls down . The first photo that meets his eyes is a decapitated body , spine out and laid aside it , whatever is left of that body is a pile of rotting flesh and scattered intestines , the body wasn't clothed , and the chest area looks like it was cleanly cut open , all the insides poured out and instead of a heart , something that looked like a head , stripped of every inch of skin , rested inside the empty chest area . Aira couldn't stare any longer , he pushed the phone onto his friend , fighting back the urge to throw up the small amount of food he ate at breakfast . His eyes wide at the horrific idea that a human being is capable of painting their hands with someone else's blood , and transforming the image of another perfectly-shaped human into this..

He was even more terrified at the idea that he could be this monster's next victim .

"I-I'm sorry! I shouldn't have let you see that..I wish I lived near you so we can walk home together . Are you going to be okay?" 

"Y-Yeah..I think..I'm walking home with hiiro-kun , y-you know? The boy from my unit?" Even when he tried comforting himself with the fact that hiiro is walking home with him , Aira couldn't shake that image from his brain the entire day . The terrifying details and thoughts—what if the last day of his life is today? What if even hiiro can't protect him? What if he makes the horrifying discovery of hiiro's body one day? He wouldn't let himself live to see another day if anything bad happened to any of his friends .

Five more minutes until the last school bell rings for the day , Akiomi walks in with an announcement .

"I'm very sure all of you already heard about the missing reports these days , so we advise you to walk home in groups and look out for each other . There won't be any classes starting from tomorrow , until the police lets us know that it's safe for students to come back . In the meantime , please stay at home and only go out if necessary" 

The teacher's announcement only made Aira feel more shaken . He just wanted to go home and sleep in his bed , and hope that this day will pass like a bad dream . Once he heard the bell ringing , he grabbed his back and rushed to find hiiro , not bothering to say his goodbyes to his friends .

"Hiiro-kun!" Aira hugged hiiro with all his power as if it was the last time he gets to hug him.

"I'm here , aira! Why do you look out of shape? Did something happen?" 

"I'm just..I just really want to go home..let's just leave" he grabs hiiro's hand , but the other boy doesn't move.

"I'm sooooo sorry aira! I promised sagami-sensei I will help clean up the gym after school , everyone was too scared to volunteer so I did!" Hiiro rubbed the back of his neck .

"Are you serious right now?! I..I'm really scared! I've seen things that you haven't , you don't understand how dangerous this is! You're ALWAYS like this , Hiiro. You never take anything ever seriously! If I don't make it back home alive , I'll never forgive you!" And with that , aira stormed off .

'Ahhh you have to focus! Keep your guard up! If I see anyone acting suspicious I'll just scream for help..I guess' His mind was blurry with thoughts , he didn't notice the familiar person waiting for him by the school gate .

"Aira~right here" 

"Tattsun-senpai? Why are you here?"

"Your father called and asked me to drive you home~the reports of missing people only go higher by the minute , he was worried about you . Let's go~"

Aira smiled . He truly felt safe with a trusted adult like tatsumi , not someone who'd leave him behind like hiiro...

As he got into the car , something didn't feel right . Why did his father trust Tatsumi out of all his friends to drive him home..? Even if they were friends and in the same unit , wouldn't his father trust someone more "responsible" in his eyes..?

And then he noticed Tatsumi driving in a different route .

"T-tattsun-senpai..? This isn't the road I usually take-"

Shit . His quivering voice gave it all away .

"I know~I'm just avoiding traffic , and I'm passing by a store to grab a few things , I hope you don't mind~"

Aira tensed up . Tatsumi was his friend that he could trust , he would never actually kill him..right.......right?

"I won't be late~" Tatsumi leaves the car . This was Aira's chance . 

Once he sees the green haired man disappear into the store , he opens the door and runs as fast as his legs could carry him . 

The adrenaline pumping in his blood from the suspicious situation he just encountered helped him run faster . He didn't bother looking behind , and while he was still running on the main road he figured out tatsumi could still see him when he leaves the store , without thinking , aira runs into an empty , dark alleyway .

Barely running a few meters into the dark area , his senses stopped him .

'What am I doing..! My fear took over me..tattsun-senpai would never..! Or would he...just shut up! Wait...is there someone sitting by the wall there? They could be gangs..or even worse..! I need to go back..but..tattsun-senpai..God this all that dumb hiiro's fault! Wait..didn't the person notice me? I've been here long enough to be noticed..they might just be drunk..in broad daylight?'

"U-uhm..excuse me?" The boy approaches the person crouching on the floor , but the closer he gets , the more he regrets it..

His hand flew to his mouth to stop himself from gasping too loudly . His legs shook , but no matter how hard he tried to move away , he felt as if he was frozen in place . He wanted to scream , cry , throw up , die...

He never would have imagined that one day he would witness a scenery as gruesome as this one . He just discovered a dead someone's remains , and even worse , he hated how he could recognize those blue locks and frail figure as his beloved senpai, hajime shino . He knew it was him , how can he not recognize the purple heart keychain he gifted him on his birthday , hanging from his bag the was thrown next to him?

His senses kicked back in before he would expose his position even more , and he turned to made a run for it , but got caught as fast as he tried to move . Someone is standing behind him , pinning his arms with their own , and their other hand muffling his noises . He couldn't help but break down in tears . He just wanted to scream and cry and beg to be spared . He didn't want to die . All the regrets of his previous actions made him choke on his tears . He should have never left tatsumi's car , now he's going to die and the last words he ever spoke to hiiro were stained by his anger and fear .

"Shhh..not a sound little bird~ or you'll end up like the messy thing you just saw" 

Why did the voice seem familiar to him?

He wanted to speak , ask who they are , what their motives are , he wanted to let out anything , just a few minutes long enough to convince this monster to let him go and live another day .

"I'll loosen my grip now , but don't think of running off anywhere , I can find you~" the taller person slowly loosened their grip on aira's body as they sensed he wanted to say something .

Aira took a few moments to breath and cry silently , his knees buckled and he fell to the ground , shaking and trying his best to silence his sobs .

"P-Please don't kill me! Not now..! I'll do anything—please!"

He couldn't look up to see his friend's murderer , he didn't even want to . He couldn't imagine what terrifying expression this monster could be wearing right now . It must be a really fun thing for them to haunt down little boys and kill them .

"W..what? Are you..aira-san?" 

Aira's eyes widened in shock . He finally understood why this voice was so familiar to him .

He slowly and shakily looked up to meet the person's eyes .

"H-huh?"

"I feel so, so bad you had to see this! I'm so sorry , I'm horrible , I should die instead!"

"M..mayo-san?"

Aira , still shaking in shock , couldn't believe what he was seeing . He hoped it was just a hallucination due to the insane amount of adrenaline running through his veins—he was still hoping it's just a bad dream .

"I won't hurt you..please don't be afraid of me!"

Was he seriously saying that right now? Aira's eyes couldn't deceive him..it's true . Mayoi is the one behind all those disappearing , and behind his dear friend's death .

Mayoi kneels down to aira's level , brushing his tears away with his bloody hands .

"It's really my fault for not cleaning up my mess~I feel so bad a cute and innocent person like yourself had to see this~" mayoi smiled . How can he smile? It's that same smile he wears when he's really happy about something..was he lying this whole time?

"Mayo-san..are you..happy? Are you..seriously happy? Did you hit your head?" Aira pushed mayoi's hand away from his face .

"Hehe..of course not~ I'm not doing this with my own will~ I can't control it , aira-san . Please believe me" mayoi pouted .

"N-No..you're a liar..you..You killed shino-senpai..you.." aira broke down in tears again .

"I didn't do it on purpose~people make mistakes~" mayoi reached a hand to pat down aira's hair , but the little boy slapped it away .

"Please don't touch me..I want to go home" aira cried . 

"Don't get on my nerves , aira-san~ you've already seen what I can do when I'm mad.."

Mayoi's voice change sent a shiver down Aira's spine .

"O-okay.. I'm sorry..please let me go home in one piece and I swear I won't tell a soul about this!" Mayoi could easily let him go , as long as he keeps in touch with him,  he knows aira won't tell on him . But something about aira's begging and his undying will to live made mayoi rethink about his decisions . 

"I'm doing this because I love you~" without a warning , mayoi hugs aira. The blond yelps at the sudden action , and completely shuts his eyes and buries his face into mayoi's shoulder , as he could clearly see Hajime's corpse from the position he was in .

"And because I love you , I want the best for you~ so be a good boy and do as I tell you from now on~"

"What..?"

Aira hears a clench , with a sharp pain in his left side , his eyes widen as mayoi pulls away from him , his body goes cold and he freezes in place. 

"Now if anyone asks , I saved you from an encounter with the 'mysterious' murderer, if you keep it that way , I'll let you live~ you're a cute shining idol , I don't want you to end up like your little friend over there~"

Mayoi pulls out the sharp knife from Aira's side , licking the blood away .

"Hm..doesn't taste as good as I had imagined..alright , I'll take you to the hospital now!" Aira struggled to keep up with anything mayoi has said , he struggled to breath or keep his eyes open , the last thing he saw was mayoi's sickening smile as he carried him and ran off . After all , the monster that grew within him of his own selfishness , desires and feelings that have been buried a long time ago . It's all out now and it will take a lot more than a series of killings to stop it…

[stormblessed95]

My Thoughts While Watching Memories 2020 Discs 1 - 3

Had multiple people ask me to post my thoughts and feelings about moments from memories as I make my way through the DVDs. Here are my thoughts condensed and definitely not all of them or over everything from the first 3 discs! 💜💜 Like I said before, I typed most of this out as texts to @1imstillme3 and I'll mostly be copy/pasting over here with some refinements and adds in. If you are not wanting to see spoilers for things in the memories DVDs and talk about moments that happen, please just skip over this post!

Disc 1

BangBangCon The Live

Track list:

Dope

Boyz with Fun

Like

Just One Day

Jamais Vu

Respect

Friends

Short snippets of UGH and Zero O'clock

Black Swan

Boy With Luv

GoGo

Anpanman

Spring Day

This whole first Disc was just the concert performance. It was amazing, as we should all know. My favorite performances personally were Boyz with Fun (Tae and Hobi! And they were all just having fun!), Just One Day (Jin and JK with the rose! the smiles!), the previews of UGH/00:00 (their voices, their engery, Jimin! Yoongi!), the units (i love them so much. Namjoon having a blast in particular and Vmin giggling at the end), Boy with Luv (the umbrellas!!) and Gogo (Jungkook! Their energy!). I'm bad at narrowing things down. Sue me. Also Jungkook laying directly in front of the TV with a giant smile watching Vmin perform friends and then comparing his pinky to Jimins as soon as Vmin get back to the group makes me SOFT. Hobi making bracelets for all the members over Vlive and then giving tbem out to everyone in between songs was the sweetest freaking thing. He is the sweetest man in the world. Protect him. Including ARMY in the group hug at the end was insanely adorable.

Disc 2

BangBangCon Behinds, including VCR, Rehearsals, Dance Practice and D-Day making films:

It was the absolute cutest. Bang bang con morning of interactions and how they all showed up to the set were almost separated by unit which was funny. The 2seokkook unit with Jamais Vu. And then NamGi and Vmin showed up at varying times together too. It was cute.

Hobi, Jin and JK are eating before they get ready for Bang Bang Con and they are 100% parenting the hell outta JK 🤣 worried about his sleep, how he is eating, if he is getting enough sunlight. "I told you to get 30 minutes of sunlight a day, it's good for you" JK just smiling and nodding along.

Hobi leading dance practices and giving advice is one of my favorite things to watch. Like 100% absolutely. And Jin worked so hard, relearning the choreo on his own time since he had to miss group rehearsals the first 2 days.

Jimin took charge a lot during practice with the umbrellas, it was really nice to see him working so hard to get the details right. Hobi stayed later than everyone to review details of their practice all the time and remember what they needed to work harder on the next day. Just main dancer things

Jimin praising Tae for his idea to do BWL with Umbrellas and the different things he came up with for the performance. And then both Jihope reaching over to touch on him and praise him. It was so sweet and cute.

NamJin saying that their families were watching BBC together too 😭😭 all so precious. It is obvious they all worked so so hard to give us the best show they could. It was clear that it was odd and weird for them to do this performance for the first time without ARMY but they made it work. Yoongi kept saying make some noise anyway and Jin kept trying to include us in their conversations regardless. JK kept reading the comments and being so cute. I love them so much!

Disc 3

MOTS7 Dance Practice Film:

Remember the clip of JM teaching Tae cartwheels and how soft it was? What they didn't include was JK being junping when he saw them and teasing V by saying HE can do cartwheels and being like I can even do it on both sides. And then did some cartwheels and almost kicked Jin in the face 🤣🤣🤣 Suga also was so perplexed. He was asked what are you doing like 3 times and finally was just "No really. Why are we doing cartwheels right now? What is happening?" And JK was doing his cartwheels and vmin totally ignored him to continue doing their own thing. Namjoon also was asking why they are doing this right now and was confused. Lmao just Maknae line things I guess. But still that was such a cute moment with Vmin.

Jimin is so hardworking. So talented. He took charge so much with helping the members with things and with his solo dances here

Everyone complaining about being stiff and needed to stretch more because of so much practice. Everyone expect 3J, dancers extraordinaire.

MOTS7 Jacket Shooting Film:

Jin should be illegal omg. He bodied this whole shoot. Every single concept. But Especially the first one. My goodness.

3J have so much fun together. It's not stop laughs every single time they do anything and they slay it at the same time. One of my favorite units ever. There was SO MUCH jihope in the MOTS7 jacket shooting video as a whole. Hobi was all over Jimin quite often.

The pyramid photo shoot was the most chaotic thing I witnessed through this whole jacket shoot. They could not stop giggling. There was so much ass grabbing. JK laying his whole body on top of Jimin connecting at every body point, literally don't think he was on anyone but JM lol. Tae looked like he grabbed Jimin's ass at one point. Tae with his hands all over Jins hips. Hobi literally grabbing and shaking Jins ass. All the hands going everywhere. All the guys teasing each other, Jin yawning. Honestly was this just an excuse to touch each other? You don't need one! 🤣 Suga just peacefully perched on top of everyone else with no worries of being squished

Honestly this whole shoot was just them having fun and sharing their positive energy with each other.

Shadow and Ego Making Films:

When Jimin visited Hobi on the Ego set he said he drove 3 hours to see him. And got all shy when Hobi was telling him how good he looked and he was dressed so nicely. And Jimin said he wanted to look nice to see Hobi 🥺 All the other guys were recording for the album so Jimin couldn't stay long because he wanted to also visit Yoongi and then he also had to go and do some recording. They work so hard and Jimin still made sure he went to see Sope on their sets and you can see how much it meant to both Hobi and Yoongi to see him and get that visit. They both perked up and had more energy after Jimin left and they continued shooting. Jimin gave them so many compliments and told Yoongi how cool he was and the set was when he watched him shoot for a bit. And he brought them both ice cream treats. An angel

Sope were also so sweet and clingy even though they weren't together. Talking about each other and wondering how they were doing for their shoots since it was at the same time. Video calling each other during break. Getting videos from the staff of what the other was doing AT THE MOMENT on their set lol just the most precious bond 🥺🥺

Black Swan MV Making Film:

Remember how everyone was saying jimin was jealous of the taekook backhug at the end of the black swan MV shooting? Or that JK was trying to make him jealous or that they broke up. Or there was some kind of tension between KM? Yeah, we get like an extra like 3 or 4 minutes of them talking during that part in memories and through that whole time, TK are just looking at Jimin like he hung the moon and the stars as he laughs and talks about the MV. How they shooting in LA and how cool Hobi is for shooting CNS internationally here in LA before. And him smiling and looking fondly back at the both of them. Jimin was laughing and having a good time but also he was exhausted. When it wasn't his turn to talk, he wasn't as animated, he was tired. If he made eye contact with TK, he looked so fond at them, and if someone else spoke to him, he responded with smiles. He was so obviously not upset and TK weren't doing anything wrong and JK wasn't trying to be petty. He looked so in love with JM honestly. We know how much he liked Jimins black swan look.

I talk ALOT about my other favorite parts of the black swan memories stuff in previous posts. You can find them on my masterlist under "Jikook posts" and then "memories 2020" topic. My favorite moment from the black swan MV making is definitely the overly flirty way they were speaking to each other when Jimin was teasing JK about getting to go home before he found out that he had to stay late with JK to be his shadow. The way he used honorifics with JK and their tone of voice. The flirt level was intense. Lmao

ON Kinetic Manifesto Making Film:

Tkkrs speading a clip around of JK checking out Tae and making it seem like a sexual thing from On Kinetic Manifesto shooting film. Cutting out the before and after bits that are actually 3J all checking out and complimenting Tae on his temporary tattoos and outfit for the shoot since he just finished getting them done and finally joined the rest of the guys 🤣🤣 He was the last one out and made a wonderful entrance. His tattoos and outfit were striking and deserving of compliments. It wasn't a sexual check out it. It was a hype up session between the dance line. I loved seeing it. It also highlights yet again, the important of context. There was no full body "I want him" check outs. It was a check out of his new tattoos down his neck/chest and face. Which, understandable. Hobi also told him that he was bringing out his inner demon for the song. Loved it!!

Jhope while reviewing footage for ON, why did all the clips I see cut it before Jhope went "wow that was hot Jimin" after they saw his shoulder move. Jimin just yes, yes thank you. And them all saying that Jimin exposing skin would bring them in more views. Lmao the ARMY call out was NOT necessary.

Jins jacket was not silver?! They decided they had too many members in black jackets so they spray painted his black leather jacket on the set!

ON MV Making Film:

Jin acted out his feelings of despair during the ON MV with the dead Dove by imagining he had worked super hard to get to max level 100 on a game and then his account was deleted and he had to start over 🤣🤣 Why are they like this? I love them.

Jin, JK and Hobi were the only ones shooting on Day 1. Hobi scolded JK teasingly to make sure he lays down and plays dead properly during his scene. When JK got to leave first, Jhope asked him to wait for him and JK just was like "what?" No idea if he waited or ditched him for home. Lol

Tae being the sweetest boy while everyone else ate snacks during JKs solo shoot, Tae went and delivered and hand fed snacks to the crew that was around and camera men and fhen fed JK a snack as soon as the camera stopped rolling. He was making sure everyone who still had to be working still got to enjoy the tasty snacks 🥺 An Angel. We don't deserve him.

Vmin dancing and being so sweet together to show the young girl on set with them how to dance so that then she could do it with Tae too. He dipped Jimin and then dipped her and I melted. They are so good with kids. The smiles were SO BIG.

SBS Inkigayo Making Film:

Vmin accounts posting Tae tapping Jimins ass as they get ready to perform black swan. Jikook accounts posting JM tapping JKs ass in the black swan pose. Reality: JM tap JK ass, Tae tap JM ass, JM tap JK, Tae tap JM.... JK confusion 🤣 Vminkook ass tapping chain

Jin and Jimin bickering over the black swan inkigayo stage. Jimin teasing that he got a lot better but he needed to move back in time so thay JM could get in. Jin saying it was the stages fault because he can communicate with the stage and it told him to dance longer. Why are they like this?!

Please. Yoongi said the stylists dressed him up in a space suit and asked if they were sending him to NASA 😂 his outfit for Inkigayo week 2 performance lmfao

Taekook being silly with the choreo before practice and then convincing all the hyungs (with Jins help) to do finger hearts during the ON bridge part since it's the last performance for the show they are filming to show ARMY love. Everyone was trying to convince Hobi to do the heart thing on stage officially since it was technically their last performance for the show. And Hobi didn't truly get on board with it until Jimin did. And when I say Jihope main dancers and the unofficial performance directors for the Tannies, this is what I mean!

When they did the hearts for the stage, everyone laughing super hard at Tae's cute heart. Namjoon told him to do it the same way for the offical recording. And then giggling over JKs dramatic heart while he sings HIS heart out on the bridge. Everyone, except Jimin. Jimin looks so freaking endeared and fond watching that playback during JKs heart part 🥺 I melted. He loves him soooooo much.

Namjoon and Jimin talking about how sad they were that they weren't performing with ARMY is taking me out 😭 Yoongi giving Jimin his signature comfort smile as he passes by knowing Jimin is sad 😭 and JK coming up to rub his neck/shoulder briefly to comfort him. Omgggg.

Wow! Okay, so that's it for the first 3 discs. Obviously this isn't even close to everything that happened. I mostly just discussed what personally stood out to me. For more in depth stuff over some Jikook moments in memories, be sure to check out my masterlist. I'll post more parts to this as I make my way through memories if people want me too! Thanks! I hope you all have a wonderful day!

[sparrow-stunned]

Okay okay i just need to ramble about the yandere xiao fic because woah it was so 😭🥰

It genuinely filled me with pure dread to the point i closed my curtains and it’s been a long time since anyone’s writing was able to do that. So like very props to you because your writing??? Absolutely immaculate 😩👌

A lot of writers forget that the yandere trope is supposed to be terrifying yet also enjoyable for the reader, like they just write a kidnappingbut make the character slightly overprotective, but not really intimidating. But you, oh you managed to capture that feeling of horror, the slow loss of hope, the drowsy feeling of separating yourself from reality because of it all just ugh it’s so perfect, love it so so much.

Also i was crying during the end, when Eula came to save us 🥺 it made me so sad, the lost love between darling and her. I was practically screaming in my head “no!! Eula run away!! Don’t die for this!!” And i’m so glad she (hopefully) got away without any extra harm to her. I hope she got to go live a happy life and find someone else to love her, getting to move on from the reader. Sad but I wish only the best for my favorite woman <\3

Anyways sorry for the rambling!! It’s just that your writing is absolutely perfect and i will be re-reading that fic for a good few weeks, i just absolutely had to let you know how perfect that fic

wow, thank you for such a wonderful comment! please don’t be sorry —it’s not rambling to me—because it honestly made my day. I love reading comments/feedback/thoughts about my fics, since my perspective as a writer is very different from that of a reader.

it’s funny that you mention it filled you with dread, because when I write yandere fics, I don’t consciously go for that kinda mood. it just kinda happened with this fic, with the background and characterization.

the xiao I chose to portray was a bit removed from what I would describe as canon xiao—more animalistic, less restraint, none of that morality struggle nonsense, especially considering that he’s really not grappling with things like karmic debt. less traumatized, and a lot more dangerous. so yeah, that mental divide between him and darling, where he truly does not understand what he’s doing wrong, means fun times for everyone.

as for yandere portrayals, soft or sadistic or whatever, i read depending on mood; coincidentally, before writing, I happened to read this amazing darkfic, dead dove do not eat variety. really made me in the mood to write something fucked up—so with the anon request, i was like... how about 'let’s have sex while i'm forcing you to look at a man I killed for you while in a puddle of his blood'

on the one hand, hot. on the other, what the fuck.

(also, I will be honest and say that my brain was in constant thirst mode while writing some parts…)

fanfics are very much personal preference. different strokes for different folks, as the saying goes! I like yandere fics where the danger is subtle. for me, it’s not so much about the capture, but moreso the ✨implications✨. yes, I am indeed a fan of things like suspense and slow burn haha.

i definitely think there’s room for many types of portrayals, though I’m happy to hear you liked mine! my personal preference is focusing on the psychological aspect, which you can definitely see in the fic when darling just kinda goes.. despondent. your comment about the loss of hope and their separation from reality is spot on!

Poor Eula… I was considering having a more, um, gruesome ending, but I love her too much to really go through with it. she’s quite a comfort character for me, so it'd have been jarring to write. I had a lot of fun writing the Eula and darling scenes though, since they were so cute.

overall, a big thank you for the feedback! I really, really appreciated this ask, and I’m happy to see you enjoyed it so much!