#AND YOU MIGHT THINK THAT THAT MAKES NO SENSE

[celestiamour]

hiii can u pls write headcanons for choi su-bong x shy reader? ty ❤️

━━━ .°˖✧ requested by @123abc123zzz ˚₊ ⊹

ft. choi su-bong (thanos) x f! reader — squid game

╰₊✧ teaming up & flirting with a shy reader┊0.4k words

contains: thanos being thanos, shy reader obviously, it’s not actually clear if the reader actually likes thanos because i forgot about that um

➤ author's note: so sorry this is so short!

╰₊✧ most don’t notice you because of how quiet you are, but he spots you immediately and makes a beeline toward you because he has an internal radar for cute girls. when you look away the first time he approached you and flirted with you, he thought you were flustered by his way with words and that he finally scored, giving his buddies high-fives and everything at the accomplishment. although it didn’t take very long for him to figure out you behaved like that with everyone who spoke to you because of your timid nature, but he was willing to work with that and still considered the first interaction as a success because a win is a win. 

╰₊✧ keeps an arm thrown over your shoulder and keeps you in his circle knowing you were too shy to say no or to leave for another group when you were too scared to socialize with others. you become close to min-su because of this and often sit together in comfortable silence, but thanos gets jealous over it and might corner him in the bathroom at some point to tell him to back off even if it isn’t romantic. nam-gyu doesn’t like you because he hates how the boss treats you better than him when he’s the right-hand man, but is still polite towards you when you’re still part of the team. se-mi thinks you’re cute and would flirt with you too, but she’s too lazy to deal with him any more than she already does so chooses not to (not in front of him anyway). 

╰₊✧ thinks you’re super cute when you can’t even make eye contact with him and stutter when speaking back, unironically refers to you as his girl, dedicates romantic raps to you, and promises to protect you throughout the games (kinda uses you in a way though, like he takes advantage of your shyness to manipulate other players, especially the women and older players who take pity on a girl that resembles a wounded baby deer and give her extra food).

╰₊✧ might get a little frustrated with it as the games progress and encourages you to be more like him in the sense of confidence and not giving a fuck about what others think. whether or not this actually works depends on you, but he certainly makes an effort.

╰₊✧ ballroom dances with you during the mingle games idk i feel like he would have fun swinging you around as you quietly panic.

[angelseraphines]

ೃ⁀➷ do you think you’d kill for me, one day? ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🦢 ꒱

╰┈➤ hwang in-ho x player!reader imagine

a/n: i would like to give a special thank you to @lumillsie for the layout of this post and for the filter used on the header! there is also a part one to this imagine, playing dangerous!

˚ ༘♡ the room plunged into darkness, and the air grew heavy with anticipation. bursts of violet and rose-red light erupted like fireworks, each pulse brighter and more jarring than the last. the lights burned into your retinas, blinding and relentless, painting the room in frantic, chaotic hues. shadows danced wildly across the walls, twisting and writhing as if they were living things. a smooth, mechanical voice rang out, tranquil and serene, “two.”

˚ ༘♡ you could feel your heart hammering in your chest, each beat echoing louder in your ears than the voice itself. your eyes scanned the chaos, flicking from face to face, desperate to make sense of it all. young-il, player 001, had already pieced it together. there were only fifty rooms, but one hundred and twenty-six people remained. at most, one hundred players would survive.

˚ ༘♡ suddenly, everything moved in a rapid blur. young-il, who had been quietly explaining what he believed would happen, was no longer talking. his hand shot out, gripping yours with a force that left no room for hesitation. his touch was steady, commanding, and before you could even process what was happening, he was pulling you forward. there was no time to think, no time to question.

˚ ༘♡ your feet stumbled beneath you as he dragged you through the chaos. panic gripped your chest and clawed without mercy, your breaths coming in searing, shallow bursts. ahead, a yellow door loomed like a shelter in a storm, sanctuary, a chance of survival. sweat trickled down your temple, stinging your eyes, as the two of you surged toward it. so close. you were so close.

˚ ༘♡ then the blow came.

˚ ༘♡ it was sudden, vicious, and it knocked the air from your lungs in an instant. a sharp, heavy kick to your stomach sent you sprawling to the cold, unforgiving floor. pain exploded through your abdomen, radiating outward until it felt like your entire body was on fire. you gasped, choking on the air that refused to return to your lungs. blinking through tears, you managed to look up. a tall, wiry figure stood over you, player 285. his face was set in stone, his eyes harsh and callous. you were nothing to him. just another obstacle to trample over.

˚ ༘♡ pain fogged the edges of your vision, but fear kept you moving. trembling, you tried to push yourself up, your arms weak and shaking beneath you. the countdown timer echoed in your mind like a death knell, each second slipping away faster than the last. a sinking realization clawed its way into your thoughts, you might not make it. the notion wrapped itself around your chest, squeezing until it was hard to breathe.

˚ ༘♡ young-il was at the door now, his moderate frame blocking the entrance as player 285 lunged at him, desperate to get inside. young-il didn’t waver. with a strength you hadn’t seen in him since he bludgeoned players 230 and 124, he wrenched the metal door open wider and grabbed player 285 by the collar. his grip was iron, unyielding. in one swift motion, he threw the man backward into the frenzied crowd, far from the door.

˚ ༘♡ “go!” he barked, his voice cutting through the chaos. the authority in his tone sent a jolt through you, and your legs moved on instinct. you scrambled to your feet and stumbled into the yellow room, the door slamming shut behind you. relief should have washed over you, but it didn’t.

˚ ༘♡ the room was drenched in horror. the walls and floor were streaked with blood, its metallic scent sharp in the air. in the corner, a man, player 343, sat quivering. his eyes were wide with terror, his hands twitching uncontrollably as he stared at you and young-il.

˚ ༘♡ young-il leaned against the door, his chest rising and falling heavily. the muffled shouts and pounding fists of player 285 echoed from the other side, but they barely registered. there were three of you in the room. the rules were clear. only two could stay. someone had to leave, or none of you would walk out alive.

˚ ༘♡ “please… please, we were here first…” the man stammered, his voice weak and desperate. his hands clutched at the wall as if it could somehow shield him. he made no move to fight, his stout body rooted to the spot.

˚ ༘♡ your gaze flicked to the countdown timer. twelve seconds. the world seemed to shrink, the weight of the moment pressing down on you in a suffocating fog of despair. your voice broke as you turned to young-il. “i’ll go,” you whispered. “if i don’t… we’ll all die.”

˚ ༘♡ the words tasted bitter, wrong. every fiber of your being screamed against the thought of stepping outside, of waiting to be executed in cold blood. but what choice did you have? standing there, all three of you frozen in fear, would only ensure everyone’s death.

˚ ༘♡ young-il’s face remained unreadable, his dark eyes blank as he stared at the man in the corner. then, with an abruptness that made your stomach drop, he moved.

˚ ༘♡ in a single fluid motion, young-il lunged at player 343. before you could process what was happening, his arm locked around the man’s neck in a crushing grip. player 343 thrashed, his limbs flailing wildly as he clawed at young-il’s arms, his face distorted in a mask of pure terror.

˚ ༘♡ your breath caught in your throat as you watched. the man’s struggles grew weaker, his movements slowing, until they stopped entirely. the sound of his neck snapping echoed through the small room, sharp and sickening.

˚ ༘♡ yet it wasn’t solely the act itself that made your stomach churn. it was young-il’s face. his expression was not cold or cruel, it was empty. hollow. there was no anger, no remorse, not even determination. merely a terrifying absence, as though he had flicked a switch and turned off everything human inside him.

˚ ༘♡ player 343’s body slumped to the floor, lifeless. the timer hit zero. the strobing lights stopped, and the door unlatched with a hiss. outside, the metallic scraping of corpses being dragged away filled the air, accompanied by blaring gunshots.

˚ ༘♡ you turned away, bile rising in your throat. your body shaking as you pressed yourself against the wall, unable to shake the image of the man’s lifeless eyes, his neck bent at an unnatural angle.

˚ ༘♡ “are you alright?” young-il’s voice was soft now, almost tender. you flinched at the sound, your mind unable to reconcile the concern in his tone with the monstrous act you had witnessed seconds prior.

˚ ༘♡ you forced yourself to nod, though the movement felt feigned. “yes… yes, forgive me.” your voice was shaky, but you tried to steady it. “i’m not used to… to seeing things so shocking.”

˚ ༘♡ young-il studied you for a moment, his melancholic eyes searching your face. “i frightened you,” he said simply, his voice flat.

˚ ༘♡ “you did what you had to do,” you murmured. “it’s not your fault. this game… it’s twisted. it forces us to do the unthinkable.” you glanced toward the door, unable to stop yourself from shuddering at the sight of masked guards dragging bodies through the blood-soaked corridors, leaving thick, smeared trails of scarlet ichor. “let’s go back.”

˚ ༘♡ young-il nodded and stepped out first, his broad shoulders slumping under an invisible weight. you followed, your legs heavy as you cast one last glance at player 343’s stiff, unnaturally contorted body.

˚ ༘♡ “you must understand,” young-il said as the two of you walked towards the exit. his voice was low, as though he were speaking more to himself than to you. “i didn’t do it for me. it wasn’t sadism. it was because you deserve to go home. you’re a good girl, i want to see you leave this place unscathed so you may see your loved ones again and lead a normal life. there are some who are too far gone for saving.”

˚ ༘♡ his words pierced the air between you, as if they had a tangible weight, sinking deep into your chest. you drew in a shaky breath, the lump in your throat rising as you fought to find your voice. “mr. young-il,” you called softly, barely above a whisper.

˚ ༘♡ he halted mid-step, the faint scrape of his shoe against the smooth, polished ground breaking the silence. slowly, he turned, his dark eyes locking onto yours. there was something unreadable in his gaze, something that burned quietly, akin to embers buried in ash.

˚ ༘♡ “i never thanked you,” you managed, the tremor in your voice betraying the emotion you tried to suppress. “you saved my life. i owe you my existence.”

˚ ༘♡ a shadow of a smile flickered across his face, fleeting and hollow, like the ghost of a feeling long forgotten. it never reached his eyes. “you owe me nothing,” he said, his voice low and rough, each syllable weighed down with exhaustion and something heavier, something unspoken. without another word, he turned away, his movements deliberate and slow.

˚ ༘♡ you stood still for a moment, your heart constricting painfully in your chest. the sight of his retreating figure, sent a ripple of unease and gratitude coursing through you.

˚ ༘♡ you forced yourself to follow, each step dragging as if the weight pressing on your chest had seeped into your limbs. the silence between you was stifling, so heavy it seemed to press against your ears, drowning out everything else. you longed to speak, but the words caught somewhere deep inside, trapped and unwilling to surface. so you trailed behind him, your steps hesitant and uneven, as though tethered to him by an invisible thread.

a/n: my second squid game fanfiction! i am so thankful for all the support and kind messages i received on my first hwang in-ho imagine! please let me know if you have any other requests! 🤍

[hwnglx]

pick a pile - your fs' strengths and weaknesses

hi dear reader! let's take a look into your future lover's potential strengths and weaknesses. breathe slowly, take your time and use your intuition to go with the pile that speaks to you the most. remember to take what resonates, and leave what doesn't. 𓆩♡𓆪

⋆⟡₊⊹ pile 1 ⊹₊⟡⋆

strengths

this person is very loyal, consistent, dedicated. not only are they calm and patient, but they also approach their endeavours with a sense of practicality.

they're not a person who gives up easily. they're entirely committed to everything they do, and won't stop until they get what they want. very hard-working.

i can see them being this reliable source of security for the people around them.

it's likely others see them as one of the first people they seek if they need any help, especially in a practical manner. you can rely on them to get things done in an orderly manner.

your fs loves profoundly, and deeply. they're good at creating emotional connections that go beyond the surface.

though they very much possess a more grounded and practical nature at their core, they do see human connection as an emotional matter. i can see them potentially having a lot of earth placements (i'm getting virgo energy strongly), with perhaps a water venus.

if this person cares about you, they genuinely care. with all their might.

they're incredibly observant. very detail-oriented and attentive to the small things.

your fs is likely to be very attuned to your emotional needs as well.

they have good intuition, and the ability to see through people quite naturally.

like they're the type of person who will notice the minor details about your habits or behaviour, which can give them a good understanding of how you function.

as an example; they can easily notice your discomfort by one look at your facial expression. they're the type of person who can comprehend the way you feel without you having to verbally and directly tell them.

this is a person who can make you feel loved for your flaws and insecurities. they easily see beauty in the things you yourself might deem as unlovable or undesirable.

if you think you can talk about yourself in a degrading manner in front of them; think again. best believe they will make you stop, and tell you to quit being so mean to yourself.

i thought of the song “pov” by ariana grande during this reading.

like this is the type of person, who not only sees you as genuinely beautiful, but will also want you to understand how wonderful you actually are in their eyes.

it's giving billie eilish's “i want you to see how you look to me”

weaknesses

this person has notably been through a lot. albeit this has given them thick skin, it can still prevent them from comfortably making themselves vulnerable in front of you.

meaning, it might be difficult for them to openly talk about their own feelings and genuine thoughts. they might still be quite closed off and guarded at first.

when it comes to you, you can talk about yourself all day and they will listen quietly, but they'll likely not enjoy opening the topic of them, and the way they feel.

they will focus a lot on you, making sure you feel heard out, nurtured and taken care of at all times, but might not want you to do the same.

this person still has a good amount of deeply rooted insecurity inside of them. they can easily feel like they don't have enough to offer you, but might hide behind a stronger facade.

might be a hard shell, soft core type of person.

your fs might have the tendency to pretend they have it all figured out, they're mature, they're headstrong and self-assured, and disguise much of their self-doubt behind that.

they could get quite stubborn, “my way” and inflexible.

they're likely to be a little overly obsessed with things remaining stable, and might have trouble accepting change.

it's like they have this exact vision of how they want things to be, and don't want to accept anything else. they could have trouble giving in and comprimising.

i also see your fs as too much of a coddler. they might get a little overbearing sometimes, with how much they wanna take care of you all the time.

they might get too easily worried and concerned for you.

some of you might think or even say “you're not my parent, stop acting like you are”

i do think their intentions are pure and it comes from a loving place; but it might get too much for some of you who need your own freedom and space to breathe.

⋆⟡₊⊹ pile 2 ⊹₊⟡⋆

strengths

as soon as i started reading, i heard “all i see is you”

your fs will be completely tunnel-visioned and focused on you.

like even if there's a huge crowd, their eyes will follow only you.

this is a person who's very self-sacrificial, and selfless.

they're supportive, generous and giving. someone who'll willingly give the shirt off their back to someone else, even if it means they'll end up shivering in the cold.

but also in a material manner; someone who doesn't hesitate to spend a lot of money on their loved ones. they think it's a natural thing to want to give them the most beautiful gifts. it definitely seems like one of their main love languages.

let's say they did a secret santa thing with their friends. your fs is the type of person who, while everyone else probably bought something silly and more trivial, will likely still put a lot of effort into the present.

your fs is also a person who's quite committed and loyal to the ones they love. they do seem like someone who's devoted and dedicated to their special relationships, and are very sure of the people they hold extra close to their heart.

they're also a person who isn't afraid to get into conflicts for their loved ones.

if you end up fighting or debating with someone while in their presence, it's highly likely that they won't allow you to argue on your own, and have your back courageously.

your fs is also a person who's quite thoughtful, careful and mindful with their words.

i can sense them being aware of the weight of words, and how heavily they can impact or affect others. they aren't the type to just speak without consideration for others.

in addition, they seem to be very wise.

i can see them being a reliable and mature person who guides others very naturally, and has a lot of valuable advice to give.

someone who's not only always ready to help you out whenever you're in need, but also genuinely helps you out.

the type to check on you asking if everything went well, after you asked them to give you advice for, e.g. a job interview.

your fs is a person you can have the most interesting conversations with.

i don't think they're much of a small-talker, as much as they are a person who enjoys having conversations that go deeper.

someone who likes talking about complex topics, and hearing you out on what you have to say on certain subjects.

they seem incredibly intelligent, and knowledgable. someone who values education. i can see some of them even being in a position of teaching people and distributing their knowledge.

your future lover has a good moral compass, and strong principles. well-established manners too.

they don't seem like someone who's into casual and lighthearted dating. they take their relationships seriously.

definitely marriage material.

the type of lover you don't have to worry about introducing your parents to. an easily likable son/daughter in law.

weaknesses

your fs seems like the type to get jealous rather easily.

“i only look at you, so i do not want you to look at anyone else as well”

obviously this doesn't automatically have to be a bad thing. however, they're likely to overdo it at times, and possibly get jealous of people like your friends too.

they look at you as very charming, and someone who has the ability to make everyone fall in love with you. therefore, they might get overly protective and to a degree, even territorial. they wouldn't like you getting a little too friendly with, e.g. a guy friend, for this reason.

your fs seems like more of an introvert. i don't think they're someone who enjoys hanging around a lot of people all the time. they often seek more intimate and quiet spaces.

i can see them feeling left alone and lonely a little too quickly.

they might cope with a lot of their problems by withdrawing.

it might be hard to get to them once you two ran into issues and you might need to give them their alone-time to process their thoughts on their own.

i don't see them enjoying conflict or confrontation. they seem a little frightened and scared of heavy drama, and might be prone to running away to actively avoid it.

your fs seems to have this tendency of hyper-fixating. they might easily get obsessed over things, and therefore quickly lose sight of other, possibly more important things.

they might constantly feel this need to prove themselves to people, and can find themselves having an inferiority complex.

this has the potential to result in them working extra hard all the time, and possibly overcompensating in areas where it isn't even necessary or very beneficial.

there's a lot of need for reassurance and validation from others in order for them to feel like they're doing a good job.

⋆⟡₊⊹ pile 3 ⊹₊⟡⋆

strengths

your fs is in possession of a complex nature. they're likely to have a rich inner world, and a good sense of intuition.

they might be a more private and secretive person, who isn't as easy to decipher. someone with a more enigmatic exteriour, who carries themselves with an air of mystery.

it's likely they're more reserved in nature, and prefer keeping their cards close to their chest.

a deep soul not many people get to see.

beyond that shell however, i can see a kind and caring heart. someone who holds much more empathy and compassion inside them than what meets the eye.

great listener. someone you can comfortably seek in times of distress. not only will they lend you an open ear, they'll also display a shoulder to cry on for you.

they just radiate this aura of understanding and comfort. someone who can make people feel understood without having to say much.

your future lover puts a lot of importance into developing a sense of trust and stability in their relationships.

they genuinely treasure their loved ones, and put a lot of effort into making sure they feel considered.

they're very protective. they do have a possessive vein, it's more of a “these are my people, so it's my responsibility to make sure they feel looked after and cared about”

i don't see them as extremely suffocating though.

if you give them the feeling that they can trust you just as much, they'll grant you room and space to unfold yourself in your own autonomy as well.

they enjoy seeing the people they love thrive and do well.

it's likely they'll love watching you blossom in, e.g. your career. and gently support you through every trial.

your future lover has a quick and sharp mind. they're the type of person who remembers nearly everything you told them, down to the most minor things.

very attentive to their surroundings, and thoughtful.

likely to consider small details about you, you yourself might deem as trivial, but to them, they're very significant.

i can also see them having this balance of being sweet in many ways, but also knowing how to mentally challenge you.

they might enjoy the occasional intellectual debate. quite savvy and witty with their words.

weaknesses

this person seems to be a perfectionist; someone with high standards, who's constantly striving for the highest level, and therefore can feel inadequate rather quickly.

like 99.8% is not good enough, it needs to be 120% at least.

although they're very hard on themselves as well, i also see them having the bad habit of nitpicking other people.

the way they verbally express themselves does have the potential to offend people sometimes; despite your fs' initial intentions being pure.

it's almost like, the more they care about you, the more they might nag.

they're quite realistic, straightforward and blunt.

i don't see them liking to sugarcoat their words or make things more digestible for anyone more sensitive. like “you better take the truth for what it is, it's not my problem if you can't.”

your fs is also very.. very clever. i can see them being amazing at manipulating people without them even noticing.

it's like you fall into their trap, and aren't aware of it until you look back on the situation later; and you're like “ah damn i should've seen it earlier.”

they're incredibly charming, and aware of how to use their charm to their own advantage.

they seem like a person who's generally calm and laidback, doesn't let people rile them up easily.

but once someone does manage to rub them wrong; they're excellent at making them regret it.

again, spirit keeps asking for emphasis on their communication; impressively eloquent.

they just know the right thing to say at the right time.

so, it's rather likely you will not be able to beat them when it comes to verbal arguments.

they can feel threatened rather easily, and might often feel like people are out to get them.

especially when it comes to the things they've been able to build for themselves.

their territorial behavior comes from them not liking to let anyone close to their prized possessions, which in their mind, often includes their lovers.

[shy2-29]

hiii i love your works so much!! i read your heeseung sunghoon fic which was uploaded recently, and fell in love.. i have a request. Can you do something like sunghoon and reader are dating, for a while but not too long. And reader thinks sunghoon doesn't like her anymore or something, because he's very cold to her and avoids her touch/ doesn't initiate physical contact much. So she confronts him about this and they get into an arguement, and sunghoon like confesses that he doesn't touch her/ or whatever because she's a virgin/inexperienced or whatever and sunghoon's quite...kinky or rough so he thinks she'll get scared and he might hurt her if they have sex?

omg this idea is jaw dropping 😱 wrote more than I expected but here you go 🤗

Beyond Expectations | p.sh

pairing: park sunghoon x afab!reader

wc: 5.7k

synopsis: you bumped into Sunghoon not so long ago, and you guys happened to get along very well. You guys then ended up dating, spending lots of time together. A month later, he’s been acting more cold towards you, but you can’t seem to figure out why. Is it because he lost feelings for you, or is it because you’re a virgin and he’s scared he might go too rough on you?

genre: collage romance, smut, nsfw, dark romance

authors note: proudest one yet.. and dirtiest

warnings: not proof read, degrading, p in v, blowjob, virginity loss, swearing, kissing, spitting, fingering, nipple play, begging, arguing, harsh language, teasing, half of it it literally pure smut

nsfw 18+ mdni.

—

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry,” Sunghoon apologized, bending down to pick up your phone.

“Oh- no worries,” you said as he handed you your phone back with a small smile.

Standing in front of you was a young Korean man, slightly taller than you. His handsome features and captivating eyes held your gaze, making it difficult to look away.

Lost in the moment, you blurted out your name. "My name is y/n," you stuttered, still captivated by his mesmerizing eyes.

Sunghoon chuckled lightly at your sudden introduction and introduced himself as well. "Sunghoon,” he said softly. His smile was warm and friendly, putting you a little more at ease.

"Is this your first day of college as well?" he inquired, studying your face intently with his sharp eyes.

You nodded in agreement, your heart pounding in your chest as Sunghoon continued the conversation. "Yes, it's my first year of college too," you responded, the excitement mixing with a hint of nerves.

"Ah, we're in the same year then," he replied, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. He leaned against the wall, his gaze still fixated on you, sizing you up.

"You don't look like the typical college freshman," he observed, his eyes lingering over your every feature. He seemed to be studying you intently, making you a bit self-conscious under his intense stare.

Your voice faltered slightly as you struggled to respond. "I-oh," you stammered, feeling slightly embarrassed. "I don't...?" you trailed off, searching for the right words.

"No, I mean," Sunghoon chuckled, his smirk turning into a full grin. "You look like you could pass yourself off as a third or fourth year." He raised an eyebrow, awaiting your response.

"It's a compliment," he assured, sensing your confusion. "You have a certain maturity about you, unlike most first-years who seem so... innocent." He chuckled again, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

You blushed as you realized your mistake. "Oh, thank you?" you murmured, your cheeks tinted with a rosy hue.

"No need to thank me, I'm simply stating the facts," he said as his gaze traveled down your body, taking in every curve and contour.

"You must have a lot of guys chasing after you," he observed, a hint of playful flirting evident in his voice.

You forced out a laugh, your heart racing. "Haha, not really," you chuckled, a hint of self-consciousness in your voice, "I'm usually just the quiet kid in the corner..."

Sunghoon looked at you skeptically, his eyes narrowing slightly. "The quiet ones are always the most interesting ones," he said, his tone dropping to a sultry murmur. "They hide the most secrets and surprises."

You felt your cheeks growing warmer under his intense gaze, the air around you suddenly feeling thick and charged with tension. you tried to form a coherent response, but your mind was blank.

"I... I suppose that's true," you managed to stutter out, feeling a little flustered by his attention.

"Speaking of secrets and surprises," He leaned closer to you, his body almost pressing against yours now. His eyes flicked down to your lips for a split second before meeting your gaze again, his voice a low whisper. "How about I take you out sometime? We can explore these secrets together."

You felt your heart skipping a beat at his proposition, his deep voice sending a shiver down your spine. You managed to compose yourself enough to respond, a mix of excitement and nervousness evident in your voice.

"I... Sure,” you breathed out, unable to tear your gaze away from his captivating eyes. "I'd love that."

A satisfied smirk spread across Sunghoon's face, his eyes lighting up with a spark of triumph. "Great,” he replied, his voice laced with a hint of satisfaction. "I'll pick you up tomorrow night."

Your heart quickened at the speed at which he proposed a date, but you maintained a composed exterior. "Yeah, tomorrow night sounds great!" you responded, keeping your cool demeanor intact.

"Perfect." Sunghoon pushed himself off the wall, his gaze never leaving yours. He took a step back, creating a small distance between you two, a sly smile playing on his lips. "I’ll need your number and your dorm room number as well-“

"To pick you up, of course." He chuckled, watching you intently, waiting for your reaction.

You blinked, a bit thrown off by his request. Hesitating for a moment, you decided to give him the information he asked for.

"Uh, sure," you said, pulling your phone out of your pocket. You unlocked it and opened a new contact, turning it towards him. "Here's my number."

You then gave him your dorm room number, feeling a mixture of curiosity and nervousness.

He took the phone from your hand, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment, sending a jolt of electricity through your body. He looked at the information for a moment before entering it into his phone.

“Perfect,” he said, handing back your phone with a sly smile. "I'll see you tomorrow night, y/n."

—

Over the following weeks, it became apparent that you shared numerous similarities with Sunghoon. A mutual love for skating and a shared shyness formed the foundation of your connection. You found yourself growing more fond of him, and from his actions, it seemed he also felt the same way about you.

As the days passed, your interactions with Sunghoon continued to grow more frequent. You found yourselves hanging out after classes, studying together in the library, and occasionally having lunch together in the cafeteria.

During your conversations, you discovered that you both had a passion for a certain author, shared a favorite movie series, and even had a mutual disdain for a certain professor's boring lectures. Each new similarity you discovered only strengthened the connection between you two.

You and Sunghoon were cuddled up in his dorm room, watching a movie together. Suddenly, he received a notification, prompting him to excuse himself.

"I'll be back, y/n," he said, planting a gentle kiss on your forehead before heading into the bathroom. “Don’t miss me too much!” You joke as you bring your focus back to the movie.

It was a text message from his close friend, Jay.

Jay: yo, I saw you with y/n the other day

Jay: you guys dating?

Sunghoon: yeah? For almost a month, why?

Jay: nothing much, just heard she’s a virgin

Sunghoon: oh

Sunghoon: from who?

Jay: I’m friends with her ex, Jake?

Jay: He told me about it

Sunghoon: oh ok

As Sunghoon turned off his phone. he took a moment to himself. His mind was racing, plagued by thoughts and conflicting emotions. He splashed some water on his face, trying to clear his head. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't shake off the weight of his doubts.

Leaning against the sink, he let out a deep sigh, the sound filling the small bathroom space. He knew he couldn't keep avoiding this conversation any longer.

He stood there for a few moments more, the sound of the running water from the faucet adding to the chaos in his mind. Taking a deep breath, Sunghoon pushed himself away from the sink and turned off the water. He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to collect his thoughts before opening the door and stepping back into the room.

Sunghoon's feelings of doubt and self-consciousness were due to a number of factors. Despite his outwardly confident demeanor, he harbored a deep fear of causing you harm. He had grown to care for you deeply and the thought of potentially hurting you, especially in an intimate context, filled him with anxiety. Additionally, Sunghoon was aware of your inexperience and worried that he wouldn't be able to meet your expectations, further fueling his insecurities.

—

The days turned into weeks, and as your relationship with Sunghoon continued to progress, you couldn't help but notice a subtle change in his behavior recently. He had become withdrawn, rarely initiating any physical contact and avoiding your touch whenever possible. You couldn't help but worry that he was losing interest in you, but you didn't know what caused this sudden shift in his behavior.

The coldness in his demeanor and unwillingness to touch you left you feeling confused and hurt. You tried to brush it off, telling yourself that it was just a passing phase, but deep down, you couldn't ignore the nagging suspicion that something was wrong.

One evening, after a particularly tense and silent dinner together, you decided that you couldn't keep silent any longer. As Sunghoon sat on his bed, staring blankly at his phone, you stood before him, arms crossed and a serious expression on your face.

“I don’t know man,” Sunghoon typed on his phone, not noticing you were in the room. “I might fuck her up, you know I can’t help myself.”

He let out a frustrated sigh, raking his fingers through his hair. The weight of his thoughts and fears were starting to take their toll on him. Suddenly, he felt a presence and looked up from his phone to see you standing in front of him, arms crossed and a stern look on your face.

He flinched, startled by your sudden appearance. For a moment, he said nothing, his eyes darting awkwardly to the floor before meeting your gaze.

“Uh, hey,” he muttered, his voice faltering slightly.

Your gaze didn't waver as you looked at him, trying to read his expression. You noticed the flicker of unease in his eyes and the way he shifted uncomfortably under your stare. A mix of concern and frustration bubbled within you.

"Why are you so distantly recently?" you said finally, your voice firm and unwavering. “If you want to break up, you couldn’t just told me…”

Sunghoon’s eyes widened at your words, and he quickly sat up straight. "What?! No, no, it's not that at all," he protested, his voice tinged with anxiety. "Why would you think that?"

You let out an exasperated sigh, feeling a mix of anger and confusion. "Then what is it?" you snapped, your patience wearing thin. "You have been acting so distant lately, avoiding me, barely touching me…"

His face fell, the realization of his own actions sinking in. He fidgeted with his fingers, unable to meet your gaze. "I…I just…,” he mumbled, struggling to find the right words.

"Just tell me the truth," you said, your voice cracking slightly. "Are you losing interest in me? Is that it?"

He shook his head vigorously. "No, of course not," he insisted, his eyes pleading with you to understand. "I could never lose interest in you, y/n. That's not it at all."

You huffed, feeling a mix of relief and frustration. "Who were you texting on your phone?" you pressed, trying to get to the bottom of his recent behavior. “Is it another girl?”

"No, no, it's not anything like that!" Sunghoon hurried to explain, trying to assure you. "I was just talking to Jay about something, I swear."

You raised an eyebrow, skepticism written on your face. "If that's true, then show me your phone," you demanded. "Let me see your conversation with Jay."

He froze, his eyes widening in surprise and mild panic. "What? You don’t trust me?" he protested weakly.

You rolled your eyes, growing increasingly annoyed with his defensiveness. "It's not about trust. It's about transparency and honesty," you retorted. "If you have nothing to hide, then there's no reason not to show me your phone."

Sunghoon let out a sigh, realizing he was in a tight spot. He knew he couldn't argue with you any further without raising even more suspicion. Reluctantly, he unlocked his phone and handed it over to you.

You scrolled through his phone, noticing a pattern in his conversations with Jay. One message, in particular, caught your eye: "Is this why?" you asked, confronting him with the text on Jay telling him you were a virgin. "Is this why you're avoiding me?"

Sunghoon's face turned crimson as you confronted him with the text message. He stumbled over his words, trying to find an explanation. "I… I didn't mean for you to see that…" he muttered, his voice tinged with shame and embarrassment.

"Answer the question, Sunghoon," you said, your voice firm. "Is that why you've been avoiding me?"

He hesitated for a moment, his shoulders slumped in defeat. "Yes," he admitted in a soft voice. "I didn't… I didn't want to scare you."

Frustration and confusion crept into your voice as you retorted, "Scared me? What's so frightening about it? Tell me, Sunghoon!"

He let out a weary sigh, his body drooping even further. "It's… it's just that I'm scared I might be too rough, or that I'll hurt you," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "And the thought of that scares me more than anything."

Anger simmered beneath the surface as you resisted the urge to lash out physically. Instead, you rolled your eyes and asserted, "I'm not some delicate flower, Sunghoon. Try me."

His eyes widened at your challenge. "Y-You don't understand," he protested, his voice quivering with a mix of anxiety and desperation. "I have... certain... tendencies, desires maybe... and if I lose control, I could really hurt you."

You let out a scoff, the frustration reaching its boiling point. "And you think I can't handle that?" you retorted. "Do you really think I'm so fragile that I can't take whatever you have to offer?"

He looked away, a mix of guilt and insecurity etched on his face. "No, it’s not that I don’t think you can’t handle it," he mumbled, his voice tinged with uncertainty. "It's more like...I don't trust myself."

You took a step closer to him, your voice filled with determination. "Well, maybe it's time you start trusting me," you said firmly. "Trust me to know my own limits, trust me to tell you if things go too far. Just give me a chance, Sunghoon."

He looked at you, his eyes searching your face for any hint of doubt or uncertainty. Slowly, he nodded, letting out a shaky sigh. "Okay," he said softly. "I'll... I'll try."

You could see the vulnerability in his eyes, the fear of being a disappointment lingering. You reached out, gently touching his cheek. "I trust you, Sunghoon," you reassured him, your voice filled with sincerity. "No matter how rough you are with me. I have faith in you."

His breaths came in staggered gasps as he placed a trembling hand over yours, holding it against his face. He closed his eyes, seeming to struggle with overwhelming emotions. "Okay," he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. "...okay."

You took a step closer to Sunghoon, closing the distance between you. You tilted your head up to look into his eyes, your voice softer now. "Sunghoon," you said, your gaze fixed onto his face. "Please... please kiss me."

His eyes widened slightly, a mixture of surprise and desire in his gaze. He hesitantly lifted a hand, cupping your face in his trembling palm. "Are you...are you sure?" he murmured, his voice tinged with a hint of desperation.

You nodded, assuring him with a gentle smile. "I'm sure," you whispered. "Just kiss me, Sunghoon."

A shudder ran through his body, his breath hitching in his throat at your words. Without a second thought, he leaned forward, capturing your lips in a rough and desperate kiss.

His hands gripped your hips, pulling you flush against his body. The kiss was frenzied and intense, his lips moving against yours with a fervor that took your breath away.

As the kiss deepened, a primal hunger seemed to awaken within him. His hands began to wander, roaming over your body, exploring every curve and contour with a possessiveness that sent shivers down your spine.

His tongue sought out yours, and the kiss grew more intense and demanding, leaving you panting for breath.

He pushed you back against the wall, trapping you between his body and the hard surface. You could feel his cock hardening through his pants. His lips moved from your mouth to your neck, leaving a trail of hot, open-mouthed kisses down the sensitive skin.

Teeth nipped at your pulse point, causing a gasp to escape your lips. His hands continued to wander, skimming over your sides and hips, his touch rough but still incredibly gentle.

He pulled back slightly, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispered, "I want you, y/n. So much. But I'm scared... I'm scared to lose control and hurt you."

His voice was rough with emotion, torn between a need for you and a deep-seated fear of causing you pain. Your heart ached for him, and you reached up to cup his face in your hands, meeting his gaze with unwavering certainty.

"You won't hurt me," you whispered, your voice firm and steady. "I trust you, Sunghoon. I trust you with my body, with my heart. Just let go, let yourself be with me."

A shudder ran through his body at your words, his eyes darkening with an intense mix of desire and trepidation.

He leaned his forehead against yours, his breath coming in ragged gasps. "I… I’ll try," he mumbled, his voice choked with emotion. "I’ll try to control myself. For you."

He leaned in, capturing your lips in another fierce yet tender kiss, his hands roaming over your body with a hint of newfound caution but still imbued with a fierce possessiveness. His touch was rougher now, less restrained, but you could sense he was holding back, still afraid to lose control completely.

With a mixture of urgency and tenderness, Sunghoon's hands moved to the hem of your top, slowly inching it up and over your head.

The cool air of the room hit your skin, sending a shiver through your body. He tossed the fabric aside, his eyes roaming over your exposed skin, taking in every dip and curve.

His hands skimmed over your shoulders, down your arms, as if exploring you, mapping out your body with his touch. He paused for a moment, as if taking a breath, before his hands moved to the button of your jeans.

Slowly, almost torturously, he unbuttoned them, the sound echoing through the room. He took his time, drawing out the moment, his eyes never leaving your face, watching for any signs of discomfort or hesitation.

He lowered the zipper, then ran his hands over your hips and thighs, his touch light and reverent. “You’re so fucking beautiful y/n.”

A shiver ran down your spine as you were exposed to this previously unbeknownst side of him. Unable to contain yourself, you pleaded, "Please, Sunghoon..." Your voice dripped with a mix of desire and unintentional desperation as your hips unintentionally bucked upwards.

A low growl escaped his throat as he felt your hips move against him. His eyes darkened with an intensity that made your heart skip a beat. "Patience, sweetheart," he murmured, his hands continuing their exploration.

He slipped the jeans down your legs, his touch still gentle despite the rough edge to his voice. "I want to savor this... savor you."

His hands roamed over the newly exposed flesh of your thighs, his touch feather-light, yet leaving a trail of fire in its wake.

You could feel the heat of his breath on your skin as he leaned in, his lips tracing a path along the sensitive skin of your inner thighs. Each kiss, a promise and a question, a wordless communication of his desire to be more than he has allowed himself to be this far.

His eyes flicked up to meet yours, as his lips continued their exploration. You could see the raw desire, the primal need, burning in his gaze. He moved higher, his lips grazing that sensitive spot where your leg met your hip. His teeth nipped at the tender skin there, then soothed the sting with a flick of his tongue.

Then, he pulled back, his eyes raking over your form, taking in every inch. He was still holding back, still scared to let the animalistic need inside of him take control.

But you could see a shift in his demeanor, a growing tension in his shoulders. He was fighting a battle within himself, and the need to lose control was winning.

He took a step back, his chest heaving with the effort to stay in control. His hands clenched, as if trying to stop them from reaching out to you. "You've got to... you need to stop me now," he said, his voice ragged. “I... I can’t... I won’t be able to stop myself if you don’t stop me now, y/n…”

The raw vulnerability in his words sent a pang through you. You could see the struggle etched on his face, the conflict between his desire and his fear. You took a step towards him, your voice gentle but firm. "No," you said, your eyes locked with his. "I won't stop you. I wanna feel you, Sunghoon."

His eyes widened slightly, the last thread of his restraint snapping. In an instant, he closed the distance between you, his hands grabbing your hips, pulling you against him. His lips crashed into yours, his tongue demanding admission.

You felt this hot, uncomfortable sensation between your legs, your body telling you to grind on his clothed leg, letting out a quiet whimper as you do so.

Sunghoon must've felt your body's reaction because he freezes for a moment, his eyes darkening almost immediately. His grip on your hips tightens as he growls lowly, a primal sound that comes from the back of his throat.

He pulls his leg back slightly, denying you the friction you're seeking. "You little slut," he murmurs between kisses. "You like testing my self control, don't you?"

You let out a frustrated whimper, your body thrumming with need. “Please, Sunghoon... I need you,” you pant against his lips. “Stop teasing me and just give me what I need.”

His grip on you loosens momentarily, surprise flashing across his face for a brief moment. Your words, your obvious need for him, seem to awaken something in him that he was fighting so hard to contain.

A low growl rumbles from his chest as he pushes you back against the wall, trapping you with his body.

“J-just do something..” you whined, “I feel something between my legs and I don’t know what it is..”

He chuckles darkly, his hands roaming over your body. "Do something, huh? Don't mind if I do," he murmurs in response. One hand moves to your hip, while the other slides down between your thighs. His fingers tease over the cloth of your underwear, and you can feel the heat and dampness there.

You moan, a shudder running through your body as his fingers touch you. Your hips buck towards his hand, seeking more of his touch. "Please, Sunghoon... I need more," you breathe out, your voice desperate and pleading. “Want your cock..”

His breath hitches at your words, a raw hunger flaring in his eyes. He presses his body against yours, trapping you against the wall.

His hands move back to your hips, his grip bruising in their intensity. “Such a dirty mouth, princess,” he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear. “Cock-hungry for me, are you? I might not be able to fit without prep..”

“I don’t care,” you gasp out. “Just do it. I need you. Now.” Your head falls back against the wall, your eyes closed as you surrender to the wave of desire coursing through you. The words tumbling out of your lips, unrestrained and wanton, only seem to fuel his own need.

He lets out a guttural moan, his restraint hanging by a thread. "You're such a good girl," he growls, his hands roaming over your body, gripping and caressing. His lips find the sensitive spot where your neck and shoulder meet, his teeth nipping at your skin. "Want me to fill you up?”

He continues to kiss and bite at your neck, his lips moving down to your collarbone, then to your chest. His hands are everywhere, seemingly unable to get enough of your body.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted this," he murmurs, his voice rough with desire. "How fucking bad I wanted to shove my cock into your tight pussy."

He reluctantly pulls back from you, his hands fumbling with the button and zipper of his jeans. His movements are slightly jerky, desperate. He hooks his thumbs into the waistband of his jeans, pushing them down his legs, kicking them off impatiently.

His shirt is next to go, tugged off over his head in one swift motion. He stands before you, bare except for a pair of black boxers that do little to hide his arousal.

You take him in, your gaze roaming over his body, taking in every curve and contour. He's beautiful, lean and muscular, every inch of him taut and defined. His chest heaves with laboured breaths, his eyes fixated on you.

Your own body feels exposed, vulnerable, but also powerful in a way. You're the only one who's ever had this effect on him, and it's a heady feeling.

Your eyes widen at the sight before you. He was right, how was he going to fit? You unintentionally reach out and grab his member, stroking it slowly.

His breath hitches, a low moan escaping his lips. His hands clench into fists at his sides, as if he's trying to hold back. "Y/n... " he gasps, his voice ragged. "You gotta stop that... I might cum like this..”

Your hand stills, your eyes widening in surprise. You didn't expect your touch to have such an effect on him. "Sorry," you murmur apologetically. "I just... I wanted to feel you."

He lets out a strained laugh, his eyes dark and intense. "Don't say sorry," he murmurs, stepping closer to you again. "I just... I don't want to scare you..”

“I’m not scared.” You assure him, your voice slightly steadier. “I trust you, Hoon.”

His chest heaves, the use of his nickname seemingly affecting him. He takes a deep, shuddering breath, then steps closer so that his body is flush against yours.

His hands come up to cup your face, his thumbs tracing gentle circles over your cheeks. "Alright," he murmurs, his eyes searching yours. "But if I get too rough, you have to tell me, okay?"

You nod your head slowly before gripping onto his bare thighs, lowering your mouth on top of tip smudged in pre-cum.

He lets out a hiss of pleasure as your mouth touches him. His hands move to your hair, his fingers tangling in the strands. “Ah..fuck...” he moaned, his hips jerking involuntarily. “Been dreaming about this for so fucking long, so good for a virgin..”

His grip on your hair tightens, holding you in place, as he starts to slowly thrust into your mouth. "Take it all, princess... let me fill your mouth with my hot cum. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

You feel a thrill at his words, a mixture of shame and desire coursing through you. Somehow, being called a ‘princess’ and being talked to this shamelessly makes you feel both incredibly embarrassed and incredibly turned on.

Despite his rough handling, you can’t help but feel a sense of power, knowing that you’re the one making him feel like this.

It’s a new sensation to you, this sense of power. But it’s addictive. You want more, you want to see how else you can unravel him, how else you can make him lose control.

You felt the sudden urge to bring your hands up to his balls, massage them as you took him deeper, gagging in the process of it.

He groans, a low and guttural sound that reverberates through his chest. His hands tighten in your hair, his hips jerking forward slightly. "Oh..fuck.." he hisses, his eyes fluttering shut. "That feels so good y/n- keep going-“

Then, suddenly, he pulls back, his eyes snapping open. "Wait," he says, his voice strained. "Stop for a second."

His actions caused you to flinch a bit, licking the access pre-cum off your lips. “D-did I do something wrong..?”

He shakes his head, his chest heaving. "No, no, you're doing so good, princess," he assures you, his eyes raking over your form. "I wanna cum inside your pussy, wanna ruin you."

You let out a whimper at his words, nodding your head Sunghoon climbed over you, taking a nipple in his mouth. “A-ahh! Sunghoon-“ you moan, arching your back to this new found sensation.

He chuckles at your reaction, his tongue swirling around the sensitive bud. His hands roam over your body, his touch rough and demanding, and yet also somehow gentle at the same time. "Like that, princess?“ he asks, his voice a low rumble. “Love the way you moan my name.”

He releases your nipple with a pop, his lips moving up your body to your neck. He peppers kisses and bites along the sensitive skin, his hands gripping your hips tightly. “God you’re perfect,” he murmurs, his voice dripping with praise. “So perfect for me, y/nnie.”

Then, his lips are at your ear, his breath hot and ragged. “Wanna make you mine,” he whispers, his voice rough with need. “Wanna mark you, make sure everyone knows you’re mine.”

His fingers trail down your body, his touch leaving tingles in its wake. He reaches your core, his fingertips gently circling the sensitive bud, making you gasp. “So sensitive,” he murmurs, his voice rough and low. “So wet already?”

“Please Sunghoon..” you beg, too cock hungry to even think straight. “Please..”

He chuckles, his eyes darkening with desire. “Impatient, are we?“ he teases, his fingers continuing their maddening pace. He then proceeded to shove a finger inside your hole in a quick fashion.

You arch your back, a low moan escaping your lips at the intrusion. "Sunghoon," you gasp out, "please... more...feel so good!”

He grins at your words, a wolfish smile curving his lips. “More, huh?” He asks, slipping another finger inside you. “You greedy slut, so cock hungry you can’t even speak properly?” He chuckled, pulling his fingers out and licking them clean, pulling them out with a pop.

“You taste so good y/n,” he says before positioning his tip inside your virgin pussy, slamming right in. “I- I told you I won’t be able to control myself..” he groaned, looking down at your pleasured expression.

His eyes are hazy with lust and he looks completely wrecked, like he’s about to lose all control. He’s panting heavily, and his jaw is clenched tight. There’s an intensity in his gaze that makes your breath catch in your throat.

“You’re so tight,” he groaned, lowering his face down, locking his lips with yours to quiet down your moans. “Do you want people to hear us? Want them to know how much of a needy slut you are?”

His voice is rough, and his words are filthy, but there’s something about them that’s so damn sexy. He’s never talked to you like this before, like you’re something he wants to devour. And it’s making you feel things you’ve never felt before.

Your eyes rolled back at his words as you proceeded to bring your hand to his hair, pulling onto it tightly, indicating that you’re close.

Sunghoon grunted, his eyes fluttering as you pulled on his hair. "Fuck," he groaned, the words guttural from his lips. "You like it when I talk dirty to you, huh? You like it when I pound into you relentlessly? Want me to fill you up with my cum?”

His pace is rough, almost savage, and it’s doing things to you that you can’t begin to describe. You’re clawing at his back, your breaths coming out in short, sharp gasps. “H-Hoon I’ll-” you stammer out, your voice catching.

“You’re gonna what?” he asks, his lips curving into a lopsided smile. “You’re gonna cum?” he mocks, his tone cocky and seductive.

“Open your mouth.”

“what?”

“I said open your mouth. Open it wide.”

You're slightly flustered, but you don't protest. You open your mouth, your tongue peeking out. Sunghoon swears under his breath at the sight.

“God... “ he murmurs, his eyes darkening even more. “You’re so perfect, y/n. So perfect for me.”

“I-I’m-” you start to say, but he cuts you off, bringing his mouth down and spits into your mouth. He laughed at your confused reaction as you swallow it anyways.

“Good girl,” he praises, his voice rough and raspy. “You like swallowing my spit, princess?”

His words are filthy, but they spark something in you. You didn’t know that words could have such an effect on you, but when they came from sunghoon, when they were spoken so low and huskily, they seemed to set your core on fire.

You find yourself responding to his words, nodding eagerly. “Yes,” you gasp out, the word coming out needy and pleading. “Yes, I like it…like it all…”

Suddenly, you felt your climax close, tugging onto his hair tightly. “Fuck.. Hoon! I’m cumming!”

His eyes darkened at your words. "That's it," he groans, fastening his thrusts, bringing a finger down to rub your clit. “Going to fill you up, fill this is virgin pussy up-“

Finally, Sunghoon thrusts himself into you one last time as you felt his cum gush into you, throwing your head back as your eyes roll to the back of your head. “Ngh- Sunghoon!” You whimpered, letting out a pornographic moan.

He groaned, collapsing onto you, his body heavy and hot. His chest was heaving as he tried to catch his breath, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin. “You alright, princess?” He asked, his voice gruff.

You nod, a little breathless. "Y-yeah," you respond, your voice coming out in a small huff. "That was... That was incredible, Hoon. I told you I could handle it..”

He lets out a low chuckle, the corner of his lips curving up in a satisfied smile. "Yeah, you did good," he says, nuzzling his face into your neck. "You were perfect, princess."

yippie! | masterlist

[prncssguya]

on hwang in-ho/front man, seong gi-hun and their dynamic.

first, idk why people are getting so upset at other people calling gi-hun dumb, we were told that in the first season. lol being bright is not his strongest trait but he has a good heart and we love that about him. however, he is still an idealistic gullible idiot with a gambling problem. except this time his gambling addiction is backed by a sense of justice and righteousness and he no longer gambles with money, he’s gambling with people’s lives. front man asked a good question at the end of the season, “did you have fun playing the hero?” can we even call gi-hun the hero of the story anymore? he gambled with people’s lives and front man showed him the consequences of his moral heroics.

front man only agreed to help gi-hun with his revolution when he mentioned about "small sacrifices for the greater good". i think he reveled in the fact that the “good guy” was willing to allow a few innocent people to die for the greater good to stop the games, which is exactly what the entire VIP theory is to rid the world of 'trash' to improve the world. notice how gi-hun's moral code and belief also changed, from being "nobody should die" into "yeah small sacrifice is okay as long it's for the greater good" at this point, he just proved that front man's belief is actually valid. AND he gets more of his own people killed in the pointless battle with the soldiers that they had no chance of winning. now he gets to feel responsible for all those deaths and the death of his friend and for whatever additional torture they cook up in the next games (as punishment for the escape attempt).

now on hwang in-ho, i believe he was once a good man and the story he told gi-hun was the truth. but in the end he lost a kidney, lost a wife, a baby, lost his money, got fucked over by the wrong people and got into serious debt and had to play this game to help his wife and probably it was too late to save her. he might have played the games like gi-hun but saw how ruthless and greedy people are and resolved that they don't deserve help

i don’t think in-ho wants/will kill gi-hun, but he wants him to understand things from his perspective and show him that his compassion for the people in the games is foolish. you can tell the frontmen (the old man and in-ho) are extremely fond of gi hun. not only did he protect their original front man when nobody else did, he then won the games and thus their respect as he is now as rich as them. he's no longer "trash", he’s an elite like them. i think they both actually kept tabs on him after he won (i wonder if they do that for all winners? inserting them with gps chips?) because they knew he had not used his reward money and in-ho wanted gi-hun to get on the plane and be happy with his daughter

there’s one interesting aspect of the games that makes front man such a complex character. the fact that they’re operating a organ transplant trafficking network. in a way, he’s creating some good to come from a really fucked up situation. but is it really for the good of others who desperately need it, people like his wife, like his brother? or is it just a money making scheme?

either way, i don’t think there is going to be a redemption arc for in-ho, he’s too far gone. we may get to see more of his human side if he manages to see jun-ho again. the only time we’ve seen genuine emotions from him was when he shot his brother like he seemed distraught

the real cliffhanger for me, is will gi-hun stay true to his belief that people can be good, or will he be forever changed into a villain and become the next front man…? after the events of this season i don’t see how his will doesn’t shatter. he’s witnessed how humanity consistently chose money over survival, he’s lost two close friends, his mother, abandoned his daughter. he has gained nothing from wanting to stop the games and this clearly feels like an origin story for the next front man. it’s clear the front man has won this round and i think squid game will either die with 001 or continue with gi-hun as game master

another thing i find funny that i don’t see many mention is how gi-hun is like the luckiest guy in the fucking world. but i don’t think him being alive this long is plot armor, it makes sense. the games exist for the entertainment of rich sadists who have so much money they don't know what to do with it (remember what old 001 said in s1 about life being no fun for both people with no money and people with too much money). and i’d imagine killing hundreds of poor debt-ridden fools year after year gets boring. especially when said fools are desperate enough to gamble with their lives because they think they can beat the system by playing better than everyone else and surviving and getting the money.

gihun is different because he got the money, got out, and still came back. not because he's unfeeling or because he wants more money, but because he's still convinced he can beat the system.

if you're a rich bored gazillionaire, would you rather watch some randos die or would you rather watch this exceptional idiot fail again and again until he learns that his ideals are meaningless and people are inherently greedy and equality is a myth and people at the bottom of the barrel don't get to question the system?

if you're an asshole gazillionaire, you don't want someone to challenge you and just get away with it. you want to hand them 45.6 billion won and make them go away quietly, traumatized, after breaking them psychologically by making them do horrible things until they understand they're just powerless "horses". if they insist on challenging you and your system and your beliefs (money = boundless power), you teach them a lesson and show them their place in the most manipulative and cruel way possible. if gihun dies right away, that's boring. so he can't die, he needs to suffer. he needs to concede defeat.

also, i find it funny how people are comparing hwang inho and gihun dynamic to hannibal and will graham. makes sense, their whole cat and mouse game, front man hiding his true nature from gi-hun the same way hannibal does, trying to corrupt the righteous protagonist, sowing chaos, testing him and observing his behavior like a lab rat, the crazy tension and staring contests, the gaslighting and manipulation. and with the fact that they think lee byung-hun looks like mads mikkelsen. i never put the two of them together but now i can’t unsee it lol

[reignpage]

Art Student!Choso

Renaissance: worship

Word Count: 5.4k Contents: 18+ mdni, plot with smut, mostly fluffy, direct continuation of the part 5 smau, and concludes pre-relationship Choso's story, not proofread so idk how much sense this makes, let me know if it’s complete bs and I’ll redo it or something

You’re staring at the most beautiful mural you think has ever been created. It’s made up of harsh strokes of ash, curving and spiralling into one another, sprawling across the entire back wall of the gym. The smudges and the streaks breeze from corner to corner, bouncing along the edges as they create layers of shadows which seem so thick you could feel it from where you stand. 

There, in the centre, you can make out a face. It’s contorted, mouth stretched inhumanly, eyes bulging and threatening to pop out. Fragmented and clawing itself, tearing skin and pulling until its face morphs into something you can’t quite make out. Dissolving into the fray, with the stark chalk, it spirals into frenzied strokes, suffocating itself. 

A gasp leaves you when you step back, taking more of it in at once, and you see amidst the smoke and the chaos, symbols, jagged and torn up. They make up even more faces, just as contorted and as uncanny, all stretched out in silent screams that pierce your soul and render your knees weak. 

It’s haunting. 

You had no idea you would walk in to find this when you were searching for Choso. And when you meet his eyes from above, leaning against the railing, you think you might actually fall to your knees. It’s the same eyes that match the big ones on the wall, both equally broken, accusing and full of heat as it never wavers from yours. 

There are so many things left unsaid, things that are desperate to get out, to be screamed at him so he’ll understand, so he’ll know. But only silence remains. 

Choso doesn’t say anything, just lets the moonlight streaming from the windows encase you both in half light, half-darkness. You can’t see the smudges on his hands, but you can see the yearning in his eyes, like he too has so much to say, so much for you to understand and accept.

Click. 

Both of your eyes dart to the entrance, there’s a security guard, holding a flashlight, aimed right you. There’s no way to escape. That’s what your thumping heart is telling you; you’ve been caught. And you haven’t done anything wrong.

“Hey! Did you do this?” He yells. 

You’re rendered speechless, frozen from the realisation that there’s no way out of this. Without looking at him, can’t bear to discover what expression he’s wearing now that it’s all unravelling between you, you walk to the guard and let him drag you of there. 

You don’t look back. 

——

“What would possess you to vandalise private property?” The Dean questions. 

His bald head is shiny, and the light’s reflection is all you can focus on as he thumps his fist against the mahogany desk separating you both. Thank God, too, because by the looks of that bulging vein on his forehead, he's pretty keen on giving you a lesson or two. It’s just you and him in his stately, stuffy office. The walls are lined with tall, dark wood bookshelves, which in turn are filled with old, leather-bound books in perfect condition, not a single dust in sight. 

“I’m sorry.”

“It goes without saying, I’m sure, that I’m disappointed in you,” he ignores you, voice gruff and measured, all condescending and pretentious. You’re convinced that’s not even his natural accent. “You have the talent, the potential, to do anything with your gifts. Your works have won many awards, and you could one day find them in museums or galleries across the world. Instead, this —this is how you choose to leave your mark?”

The chair squeaks when you shift uncomfortably, and your eyes choose to scan his meticulous desk, as opposed to his beady ones. There’s not a single paper angled wrong, no pens misaligned, not a smudge or even a water mark. 

“You’ve disgraced this fine institution. Our beloved Eden University for the Excellent has stood as a beacon for ambition, sophistication and innovation! And with every act of ‘artistic rebellion’ with your ‘cursed death paintings’, or the like, you have threatened everything we have built for centuries!”

You could try and defend yourself, could rebuff the accusations since you are, of course, innocent. But, well, the evidence is damning: you were at the scene of the crime, you’re an art student, you have attended practically every protest on campus, have liked posts from Cursed Womb’s fan-pages, and damn it, you had paint all over your shirt and hands.

You’re fucked. 

He leans back in his chair, sighing as he folds his glasses onto the desk. “There are no excuses; none I will accept. Therefore, it is with the deepest regret that I hereby — “

The door slams open. 

You both jump. 

“Dean Hanami,” a sneer projects through the office and you recognise it immediately as belonging to a guy that knocked on your door and glared at you as if you were dirt on his shoe. “We have much to discuss.”

When you twist in your seat, you’re alarmed to find three men: Sukuna in a newer looking jacket than you remembered, an old man in a suit, and a guy you haven’t seen in almost two weeks. 

Choso’s not looking at you, he’s not even entering the room, choosing instead to hang around by the doorway. 

“Mr. Ryomen, I am in the middle of a meeting,” the Dean splutters. 

Sukuna pokes your shoulder with a pen he picked up from the desk, looking over at you with complete disgust, like you’re a little cockroach. Still as rude as ever, he’s signalling for you to leave and as you look between the two men, one much older than the other, you choose to go with your instincts and rush out of there. 

“This is how it’s going to work,” he drawls, sliding into your seat and snapping his fingers at the man in a suit, “you’re going to give back everything I want, and you’re going to let this Cursed Womb farce go.”

The last thing you hear is the sheer humiliation of the Dean’s defeated stammering. You close the door behind you. 

Without looking at Choso, you walk down the hallway. 

“Y/n, we should talk,” he follows beside you. 

“Now you want to talk?” You sigh. You know you’re not being fair. Counting to ten, you try a softer approach. “Listen, Choso, it's been a long morning. Can we have this talk somewhere private? These hallways are so depressing.”

He nods, his pigtails moving with him. Wordlessly, he leads you outside, to his parked car, it’s all shiny and sleek, classic Ryomen money, and you get into the passenger seat. 

It’s odd being in such close proximity with him when he’s avoided you for so long, but you try to get comfortable regardless, ignoring the elephant in the room. There’s a Cursed Womb sized hole between you and there’s so much to be said but you’re afraid you’ll push him, that you’ll say the wrong thing and everything will be for nought; you’ll go back to being strangers, passing each other by, just like last year. 

And, whatever you feel for him, you just can’t let that happen. 

“Choso,” you begin, voice soft, “what happened? What happened between us?”

Driving, he doesn’t dare look at you, can only chew on the inside of his cheek before seemingly deciding on the right words. “I liked you. From the very beginning, I liked you. People either like me ‘cause of my family or 'cause of rumours, but you’re one of the very few people that actually reached out, saw me as an equal.”

You’re silent. He’s opening up in a way he has never before and you don’t dare disturb his flow, like one would watch a Master at work. Everything about him is compelling, the whites of his knuckles as he grips the steering wheel harder than he should, the furrow of his brows as he thinks hard, the way his gaze slides over to you, just not meeting your eyes, and even the way he studies you, in just your thin jumper and jeans and turns up the heater without asking.

Trees fly by, everything a blur as you keep your gaze fixed solely on him. He drives pretty smoothly, unlike you. You're always pressed right up against the wheel, eyes darting to every mirror like a car would appear in the millisecond you looked away. But him...he drives like it's second nature, with one hand on the wheel and the other on the gear stick.

“Despite me not being very open and particularly approachable I guess, you still made the effort to reach out, to include me in discussions, to ask if I’m coming to class — even lecturers have stopped asking. And you’re very smart! I like how passionate you are, you’re so full of great ideas, practically beaming with them. You never lose your optimism even when your art gets critiqued too harshly.”

This is the first time anyone’s ever described you like this, like he appreciates you by pure virtue of your existence and the way he sees your hard work, the strength it takes to get back up that you hadn’t recognised in yourself -- it feels like the way one would appreciate Starry Night. 

You can tell he practised this speech.

“But,” there’s a tremble in his voice and it makes your hand twitch, “you don't like me. Not like how I like you. And it makes me upset. Because you're so great and nice and pretty. Not that I like you because of your appearance, even though you have a very nice body. I mean that respectfully! Okay, actually just forget I said that. I like you for lots of different reasons. And I've been trying to get you to see me as more than your classmate or just your friend. But it's all pointless because you like Cursed Womb.”

“Choso, you are Cursed Womb.”

The car screeches to a halt. 

His hand flies out, pressing hard on your chest to stop you from flying forward. Thank goodness you’re wearing your seatbelt. And thank goodness the road is empty. 

“What the fuck!”

“Sorry!” He pants. “Sorry. I’m sorry. You caught me by surprise.”

Like you’ve been possessed, you laugh. It’s more a cackle than anything else to be honest, but the look of utter shock and disbelief on his face is making you tear up, your sides hurting as you cradle them. “Oh my god, Choso, you should have seen your face. HA!”

He’s panicking, hands waving in the air as he tries to decide between lifting your hair up to inspect for damage and going to the steering wheel so he can drive off to safety, where the chances of a car accident caused by your blunt mouth are slim. Conflicted, he decides to keep them in his lap as he winces at your chortles. You’re finding this way too funny. 

“You’re being mean,” he pouts. 

Wiping tears from your eyes, you’re desperately trying to calm down, trying to school your features into something more neutral or, better yet, something serious so you can have a mature, adult conversation. But he’s just so adorable you can’t help yourself. 

“Sorry, Choso,” you playfully frown at him, making a puppy dog pout so he’ll cave in. “But be honest here, sweetheart. You didn’t actually think you were slick, did you?”

Like a child, he smacks his steering wheel, all grumpy and upset. “No one else knew.”

“That’s ‘cause no one else tried to know. Sure, people were investigating, trying to piece together clues, but no one really wanted to know; the mystery was addictive, and that’s what peopled liked. But you think you’re the only one who pays attention? I watch you all the time. Plus, your family’s presence today was concrete proof; Sukuna would never do that just because you asked, right? And on top of all of that, you’re not a very good liar, sweet Choso,” you coo. 

He stutters, “B-but you never said. You kept talking about him l-like —"

“Like he’s not you?” You finish for him. 

“Yes! Even that night when I asked you to hang out, you didn’t want to go with me but when I mentioned the painting, you said yes.”

Your hand reaches out to play with a loose lock of hair from his messy pigtails and he lets you, his eyes flutter shut when your hand grazes his cheek. Heart clenching, you sigh again. “I was genuinely busy, Choso. But when you mentioned that ‘your friend’ painted again, I knew that meant trouble. What you do is dangerous, and I wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

“What about the other time when you didn’t want to have lunch with me? And you just wanted to work?”

You giggle, playfully pulling at his hair, and he has to pretend he’s not getting hard. “Choso, you do realise we have to balance our project on top of our schoolwork, right? Like we have to actually study and work, to meet deadlines?”

Choso pouts again and you smush your thumb against his plump lips, easing away the tension there. All muffled, he whines, “But I wanted to have lunch with you!”

“And we enjoyed sandwiches, did we not? Which by the way, you never paid me back for. But eh, that's okay. Just treat me out next time -- I'm a broke college student.”

He groans, pulling away to smack his head against the wheel. It honks and you laugh again. He’s clearly embarrassed and frustrated and he doesn’t know where to begin, so you try for him. 

“Choso, sweetheart,” you rub his back, “don’t be upset. I’ll be completely honest: I was messing with you. I kinda just wanted to see how far things will go. I mean, I knew as soon as you told me he’s your ‘friend’ that you were Cursed Womb. It’s such an obvious throwaway; I hope you weren’t feeling very proud of yourself.”

Scrunching his nose at you, he sinks back into his seat. The road is still empty, and he doesn’t seem to have any desire to drive off yet. So, you let him take it all in, rubbing his shoulder in pity for the poor guy who was clearly so proud of himself for keeping such a huge secret from everyone. 

“What’s gonna happen with the Dean?” You just realised technically you were expelled or were going to be expelled. No longer a student, you aren’t sure what you would do as a non-student — would you even make a very inspirational contributive member of society?

What’s next? 

Taxes and mortgages?

You shudder. 

Choso grabs your hand, holding it in his lap as he fiddles with your rings, clinking them with his own. His nails are painted black in true male art student fashion and his fingers are so beautifully long and slender you’re not afraid to admit that you’ve stared at them a little too long during clay sculpting class. 

“The family’s going to take care of it. Make it go away like they did when Sukuna beat up some guy who pushed Yuji. Or when I got caught by some other security guard.”

You nodded. “Where does that leave us?”

“Us?”

“There is an us, right, Choso?”

He fiddles with your ring finger, and you try really hard not to notice the hearts in his eyes. “Do you want there to be us? It’s not because I’m Cursed Womb, is it?”

Of course, you don’t blame him for feeling this way; you played around too much, gave him too much power when you really should have made the decisions to begin with, forced him to confront everything that was unspoken between you much sooner. Then there wouldn’t be this awkward energy that's holding him back from meeting your eyes. 

“Choso, I never liked you because you were Cursed Womb. Sure, I liked Cursed Womb. I stand by everything I said — he’s cool, he stands for what’s right, he sends a message and isn’t afraid to put his art out there to be critiqued by the masses. How many people can say that? But I liked him like one likes a pop star! You, on the other hand, I like you as you are. All shy and sweet and considerate. And I know the picture of me was from you, by the way.”

He opens his mouth to argue, and you shut him up with a stern look. 

“We’re project partners, Choso!” You laugh. “I’ve seen your handwriting and the way you write your Cs, you silly silly boy.”

“But you teased me anyways."

With a shrug, you explain, "You liked it."

And then he’s kissing you. 

His seatbelt is off, and you’re being pressed back into your seat, his hands cradling your face. It’s soft and sweet and gentle and it’s so Choso you can only moan in his mouth. He’s holding you like the two lovers of Rodin, with so much care, so much passion, it's leaving you breathless. You feel so much warmth and adoration through every lick of his tongue, every nip of his teeth and every moan of your name he’s breathing into you. 

You push him back, taking your belt off so you can climb into his lap whilst he pushes the seat back. He kisses down your neck, sucking your pulse point and gripping your hip as if he’s scared you’re just a figment of his imagination. And when you grind down on his hard length, he moans your name again. You’re soaking. 

“I’m sorry for teasing you too much.”

With tentative hands, he lifts your sweater up your stomach, searching your eyes for any resistance. You smile and take it off for him. He wastes no time sucking a tit, flicking the hard bud with his tongue and you’re gripping his pigtails. That makes him groan.

“I’ll forgive you if you do one thing for me,” his words are garbled, on account of him trying to swallow the entire globe of your breast, cheeks all puffed up, and you can’t help but press a kiss against his forehead. “Call me Cho again.”

“What?” His teeth graze your sensitive nipple and you arch into him, eyes crossing.

“You only call me Cho when we’re like this, touching in a way we shouldn’t.”

“Do I?” Grinding down on his dick, you tug a pigtail back so you can tilt his face away from your wet tits and back to your mouth. You kiss him again, craving his taste, his warmth. “Sorry…Cho.”

He bucks into your clothed core, straight up to your clit and you’re moaning into each other’s mouths. This isn’t enough, you both need more. Neither of you even care that you’re on the side of a road and it’s midday. 

“I want you,” he whispers, and he’s tearing up, the frustration building up to a point where he’s clawing your jeans off and burying his face between your tits and inhaling deep. “Can I? Can I have you?”

“Of course, Cho. I’m yours,” you kiss his hair. “You can do whatever you want with me, baby.”

Maybe you shouldn’t have said that. 

Because the next thing you know, the seat is folding back and you’re being thrown onto the seat, facing the plush roof. He’s tugging your jeans down, pulling the material as if it’s singlehandedly his worst enemy. You can only rub his head as he frantically looks between your face, your tits and your panties like he doesn’t know where to begin. He’s desperately asking for permission, for guidance. 

“Choso, we can do whatever you want, just take your time.” And then, as an afterthought, you add, “Although, you shouldn’t take too long since we are outside. If we get caught, I’m not sure your family can take care of the charges we’ll face.”

He nods and then with dark, unfocused eyes, he shoves his face between your leg as he kneels on the floor, spreading your thighs with his strong arms. Sniffing is all he does, inhaling deeply and moaning. You blush, pushing his hair from his face. And, as if the urge has gotten too much, he pushes your panties to the side and licks a strip up your slit, from quivering hole to the clit. 

Your back arches off the seat. 

Moans and groans escape you, shaky breaths fanning the air as he sucks your clit, mumbling your name and the vibrations leaves you lightheaded. 

“Tastes so good. Knew you would taste so good.” He pushes in a finger inside and he groans with you when he wriggles it. “So wet, baby. You’re so hot a-and wet and I want to stay here forever.”

He curls his fingers inside, rubbing against that spot inside of you that has you gushing cream all over his mouth, and he laps it up like he’s starved. Just as a car drives past and he dives deeper into you, you find yourself cumming all over his mouth and fingers, clutching his pigtails harder.

"Fuuuuuck, don't stop, Cho!" You ride out your orgasm on his face, spreading your wetness all over his chin and his cheeks, clit bumping against his nose.

Shuffling up, something wet and hard traces your lips. It’s salty. You don’t hesitate to widen your jaw, letting him push his hot and hard length into your throat. It’s an awkward angle, with you laid not fully back and him having to crouch down, but you manage a few suckles before he gets frustrated and embarrassed, and he climbs back down to pet at your pussy. 

"That's just going to have to wait later, I guess," you chuckle.

A blush blanketing his cheeks, he nods and strokes his dick. He must have taken it out when he was licking you. It's long and hard and your body remembers the feel of it in your hands. And Monet! His tip is flushed red, leaking cum like a faucet. How adorable.

You see him lining his beautiful cock to your quivering hole, but you have to press a hand against his chest to still him. “Tut tut, Cho. Do I need to lecture you on the importance of safe sex, silly boy?”

He blushes and pats his pockets with frantic, panicked movements. You sigh. You didn’t bring one either.

“Well, you’re not allowed inside without a condom,” you mutter to his cock, telling it off as if it’s responsible for its owner irresponsibility. “I mean, really, Choso. You’re a grown man, a college student! You should always have condoms, silly.”

“I didn’t think we’d ever be together so I didn’t buy any,” he mumbles, laying down on you so he can hide his sheepish expression in your shoulder. 

The implication warms your chest, making you pout and rub his back. You coo, “Aw, did my baby not want to fuck anyone else? Just me?”

Pushed to his limit, he bites your neck and then quickly soothes it with his tongue as if upset at himself for hurting you. But it’s you who feels the most guilt; you played around too much, teased him too far, and now his hips are making short thrusts against your pussy. He just can’t help himself. It’s as if the magnetic pull of your cunt is too much for a weak man like him. You’re going to have to work very hard to earn his forgiveness even if he’s willingly thrown it at you. 

Starting, of course, by wrapping your legs around his hips and pressing him closer. You whisper, “Make yourself cum on my pussy, Cho.”

He groans. Maybe it’s the seductive way you ordered him to, the vulgar term you used, or perhaps it’s the fact that you called him a nickname he loves to hear. Well, whatever it is, it’s making him whimper in your ear as he thrusts against your lips, coating his length with your juices. His tip bumps against your clit and you both moan. 

“I-I missed you, y/n!” He cries in your ear, warm breath tickling your skin. 

Again and again, he thrusts, still clinging onto you and holding you close. You can feel his desperation, sincerity, and his pre-cum all seeping into your skin. Rolling back, your eyes disappear — this is supposed to be for him, and yet you’re panting too, holding him tight, shirt threatening to rip under your claws. 

The fact that you’re naked and he isn’t is making you sensitive all over, from the way your nipples are rubbing against his chest and how he pinches at one all the way to the mumbling of your name, like a mantra, against your neck. 

You’re going to cum too. 

“Ngh, Cho! Keep going!”

He must have liked that because his thrusting gets more frantic, his cock head meeting your clit again and again and you’re both nearing your high. Your nails dig into his back and he bites your neck to stifle the broken moan that escapes him. Hot ropes of cum paint your stomach and it makes you arch your back once more, eyes closing shut. 

"So warm ngh!" He groans into your ear.

Hips stuttering, he drags out his orgasm like his body can’t help himself and a beat or two passes. He falls on top of you, still muttering your name like his brain has short-circuited and it’s all that’s left in there. 

“You like me better than Cursed Womb, right?”

You laugh. “Cho, you silly man. You’re the same person.”

Choso pushes himself up onto his elbows, slightly out of breath and dazed, a blush highlighting his face tattoo. You kiss him on the nose which brings out what sounds like a mewl from him. He copies the movement, and it tickles you. That makes him smile, still panting. 

“I know, but I want to know who you like better,” he licks a bead of sweat from your forehead and you have to smack his back. 

Sighing, you push him off, concerned over the fact that you’re naked and in a public space. He lets you scramble back to your seat, fixing your panties and leggings and he hands you your jumper. All in silence, you get settled back in. 

He starts the engine, looking a little upset and you have to still his hand with yours. Words aren’t really enough, you know that. So, the only thing to do is to show him. 

“Take us to my place, Cho.”

—

He’s confused, head tilting and brows scrunched together like a little puppy as you lead him to your dorm room. Whereas you’re practically buzzing with excitement, struggling to get the keys in due to your shaking hands. But you manage and you welcome him in. 

It’s the first time he’s been inside your place — there wasn’t a particular reason why you waited, it was really just because his place is bigger and cooler and generally a much better place to work in. 

Despite it being a pretty standard room, he’s marvelling at the space, eyeing the pictures of your friends strewn across the walls, the fairy lights and the open journal on the table full of your watercolour works. Choso looks like he just entered Santa’s workshop, and you giggle as you press your face in his back, hugging him and swaying you guys side to side. 

“Sorry about the mess, Cho. I didn’t know you’d come over.”

He holds your hands, swaying with you, but his focus is on only one thing. 

There, on your easel, stationed by the window for natural lighting, is a sketch. The lines are messy and criss-crossing, overlapping each other, the lead of the pencil unravelling to create a face loss in thought. It’s tilting its head as its own creation, examining the angles and the proportions, and you can tell it’s completely entranced in its work, losing grip with reality and wholly immersed in their own imagination. 

It’s the kind of expression you’ve decided is most beautiful in all your years of looking and sketching and studying. In all the models, in all the strangers, and in all the works of art you’ve come across, only one figure has captivated you as much it has. 

“Recognise him, Cho Cho?”

Despite the teasing tone of your voice, you’re actually pretty nervous. This has never been a problem for you; you’ve presented your work to countless of people, by virtue of being an art student, you’ve consented to being ripped apart again and again. But this time, you’re feeling a certain kind of insecurity you never have before. 

“Do you like it?”

“This is me?” He breathes out. 

You bury your face harder in his back, feeling a blush creeping up. “Yeah, Cho. I started it back in first year. I never got to finish it because, well, we’re art students and we all have ADHD or whatever. But when we became project partners, I’ve been adding to it, adding lines and details for every time I noticed something new about you. In fact, I was working on it that night you asked me to hang out and I almost turned you down. Sorry about by the way, baby.”

Waving a hand over the general area, you explain further, "At the end of first year, you got that face tattoo, and I struggled all summer adding it in because I only saw it once and wanted to recreate it from pure memory. But I couldn't ever seem to get the proportions right."

"Y-you started drawing me in first year?"

Pressing a kiss to his back and smiling at the flex of his muscles, you think back to a memory. "It wasn't like I was obsessed with you, or anything creepy, I swear. It's just that, you're a pretty handsome dude. The List agrees and well, when I first saw you in the lecture hall, I thought wow, someone needs to capture that guy in a drawing or something. And you know how us artists work — we develop fixations. I guess, you could say you've been my on and off one for a year now."

That was a lot of words and you’re not sure he registered any of it because of how silent he is, but then he’s clasping your hands tightly. And you’re shocked into silence when something cold slides down one of your fingers. On your left hand. Your ring finger. 

“Cho?”

“I think I’m in love with you,” he shakily whispers. 

You want to laugh — it’s such a sudden admission and you’re fairly convinced it’s just that post-nut high. But the way he says it, the way it’s so serious, so real makes you pull away. 

He turns, desperate to see your face. And with another whisper, he admits, “I have one of you too.”

“What?”

“I painted a portrait of you. In my place.”

It strikes you there. You remember. The painting with the tarp over it. That was of you, and he hid it because you were coming over. With a grin, you raise your hand up to eye the golden signet ring on your finger, way too big and threatening to fall off if you don’t hold it tight. 

“We’re a pretty cool duo, aren’t we?”

Choso falls to his knees, pigtails bouncing, an expression of desperation and torment written all over it. He's never looked more beautiful staring up at you. "Please let me be your boyfriend!"

You laugh again, hands on your hips as you shake your head in disbelief. Rolling your eyes playfully, you respond with, "Alright, I guess I can grant you that one wish. Actually, since you gave me two orgasms, I'll give you another one."

He reaches for your hand with his eyes closed and you let him press it against his face. Cupping his cheek, your smile drops and you feel a fire burning inside and explode in your chest when he presses a distressed kiss to your wrist, full of panic like his brain is malfunctioning and he can't settle on one thought or feeling.

Then, his eyelids fly open and meet yours with a clarity that has never been there. Never. Not even since first year when you made eye contact in passing and you couldn't get his face out of your mind. And it's like all the anguish you saw that night is gone, the chalk mural fading from view.

More certain than ever, you know he'll give you all the opportunities you need to finish your portrait of him, and every new one you'll make. And your project will be renewed with a deeper level of teamwork, because you've transcended the definitions of your connection.

“I want to eat you out again.”

And well, who are you to say no to a man on his knees?

[http-tokki]

have you ever tried this one?

and it’s just you ontop of viktor

look, i’m not saying he hasn’t fucked (look at him, he has had partners before but never like you, never someone who puts his pleasure before their own) so when you slide a pillow beneath his hips and make sure he is comfy over everything else, oh how his heart stutters in his chest. Viktor already looks at you like you hold the universe in your hands but as you perch yourself above him, hands braced on either side of his head as you grind your sopping cunt over his cock before sinking down on his aching length, he swears you begin to fade into starlight. the edges of his vision blurs as heat blooms in his stomach, pure indulgent undiluted ecstasy fills his veins and tingles in the tips of his fingers. mans is TRANSFIXED on the sight before him as your hips begin to move, slick dripping down your thighs in pearls of opalescent blue in the lowlight of the hexcore (the cot that had been set up in the corner of the lab for when he is too tired to go back to his room has been getting a little more action that it had originally been intended for) Viktor has no idea where to put his hands, what to grab or how hard to hold so you guide his hands to your hips, squeezing his fingers beneath your own before settling your palms on his chest. his heart thumps beneath your skin in a steady rhythm, his breaths shallow as his body adjusts to pleasure coursing through his veins.

“are you okay? nothing hurts?” you’re quick to check in, brows furrowed as your eyes slip down the pillow beneath his hips.

he nods, pushing his head back into the plush cushions as you tense your muscles, squeezing him so deliciously tight he might pass out.

“don’t worry about me, love. just-“ words fail him as his breathing turns ragged, your hips grinding in slow circles above his. “fuck…i-“

Viktor has always been quick of wit, a retort poised on the tip of his tongue at all times but as you begin to drag your hips up and down, cunt sliding over his pulsing cock in slow strokes that has his jaw slackening and eyes rolling, the concept of language leaves him entirely. for a moment it’s as if it is his first time all over again. awkward hands and quick breaths, unable to tear his eyes away from your perfect form as you bounce and grind above him. it’s cute, how innocent he looks beneath you, how bright his cheeks blaze, how red his lips bloom as he bites on the flesh.

“you’ve never done this?” your question is breathless, cheat tightening as the angle has your stomach twisting.

Viktor shakes his head, afraid that if he opens his mouth it would be nothing but whimpers and moans.

“do you feel good?”

another wordless answer in the form of a nod and he thinks he has retained some sense of dignity for the time being, but as you tense your muscles again, his mouth opens and his answer is a whimper.

your body stills above him as your brain registers the sound that has just spilt from your lover’s mouth.

“did you just- was that-?”

“shut up. This is a new thing for me,” Viktor grumbles but he can’t stop the grin that has spread over his cheeks. his hand reaches for your, wrapping around the nape of your neck to pull your face to his. “no one’s ever treated me like this. I can’t expect to know how I might react.”

a/n: pls be nice this is my first arcane fic i just love viktor so much gimmie a hair tie, a pillow for his hips and five minutes i’ll show piltover the real arcane

[peachesofteal]

Through Me (The Flood) - secret baby fic Simon Riley/female reader

"Simon?"

Your voice wavers, rich with uncertainty, and he's around the corner into the kitchen before you can blink. "What is it?"

"I... do we still have the large blue mixing bowls?" Orion is between your legs, arms curled around each knee. He's been doing this since you got home, positioning himself so he's almost always touching you, a tether desperate to remain unbroken.

His nightmares are back, too. And yours are worse. Only Nix sleeps soundly, Simon hardly sleeps at all.

"I wanted to make muffins." He finds them in the top cabinet, and then shifts his attention to his boy who clings to you.

"Want to go outside for a bit Ry? Let mama make you some muffins for later?" Orion shakes his head, fingers tightening on your sweatpants. You give Simon a pained expression, and he crouches to be eye level with his son, knees cracking. "She'll be right here when you're done, little man, and I'm here, remember? We have to share." Share. It's the only concept he's managed to come up with that makes sense after Orion tearfully confessed he has to be able to see his mum in order to 'save' her.

So now they share the responsibility. Two men of the house. Two of Mama's protectors.

Simon doesn't know what else to do. He put him in therapy months ago, but his son is slow to trust now, fear and danger lurking around every corner in his mind.

"I'll push you on the swing. Want to get your jacket?" You pet his head soothingly.

"It's okay Ry. Go play for a little bit and when you're done you can have a muffin, how's that sound?" He shrugs, but finally unglues himself and toddles to the door to get his coat on.

Simon takes the opportunity to pull you into his chest. "She's due to get up soon," he murmurs, tracing your spine, "just yell and I'll-"

"I can- I'll get her."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah... I want to." You've been locked in a delicate dance with the baby. A slow, unsteady, hesitant dance. Sometimes, you hold her, you rock her, you change her. Sometimes, she's crying in her crib, and you're standing in the doorway of her room, frozen, eyes wide and wet. He catches you studying your body in the mirror when you think he's not looking, hand pressed to your belly, thumb stroking your scar.

"I can come back in." He presses a slow kiss to your forehead.

"It's okay. If I need you, I'll let you know."

You're tired by the time evening rolls around, and once the kids are down, he settles you beneath the covers beside him, enjoying the heat of your body, the way you fit to him. It doesn't take much to exhaust you, but the doctors assure it's normal, you're recovering well, you'll be okay.

It's a funny thing, to be told you'll be well, that you'll recover. He remembers it, how the words were so confusing when a war was raging in his mind, when he was being torn to pieces over and over again every time he closed his eyes.

"Do you think she knows who I am?" He does. The hospital encouraged as much skin to skin as possible, going as far as letting Nix live in your room for weeks just so she could sleep on your chest, and it soothed her like nothing else.

Those things don't matter. What matters is the reality of the situation, your losses. The loss of her first cry, her breath on this earth. The loss of watching her roll over for the first time, her first smile, her first giggle. All of these moments have been stolen from you, and there's no way to give them back, no matter how hard he tries.

"Yeah, mama. I think she knows." You lapse into silence, breaths slowing, limbs relaxing, and he thinks you might be asleep when you whisper into his skin.

"Does it ever go away?"

"No." He croaks. He can't lie, not to you. "No, it doesn't, but it does change. Eventually, it's not a wound, it's a layer. The pain becomes something else, but it never goes away." You sniffle, but don't respond.

It's the last thing he says to you before you fall asleep.

He wakes instinctively to an empty bed. Cold sweat immediately breaks out across his skin, stomach churning in a storm of panic.

Lightning rarely strikes twice, but that doesn't mean it couldn't. 

But before he can fully start calculating and preparing a plan, he hears your voice down the hall.

You're in Nix's room, in the rocking chair, baby tucked against your chest, cradled in your arms. You rub her back, twirl her hair, kiss her cheek, all while cooing into her ear, and when you catch his eye, he sees a well of emotion, love, longing, sadness. Grief. So much grief.

"Y'alright?" He whispers from the edge of the room, and you nod. It feels like a moment he shouldn't intrude on, a sacred, special thing not meant for him.

And that's good. 

"I'm okay." You reassure him, trying to imbue your words with strength. It's enough for him.

He takes one last look at his girls before he closes door.

And then he smiles.

[ghostedbunnie]

trouble comes in fours; simon's ver

you are trying to scare off your ex and who better to send him running than a masked burly guy you've met at a bar and who bulldozed his way into your bed.

simon riley x fem!reader nsfw, minors do not interact!! warnings: fingering (fem!receiving), car sex, exhibitionism, oral (fem!receiving), doggy style, creampie, manhandling

prologue // other versions (TBA)

Everything that happened after Johnny invited you over (which really meant he pulled you by the hand before you could back out) was a blur. You found yourself sandwiched between the masked guy and the pretty boy who introduced himself as Johnny, speaking with a sexy, thick Scottish accent. You couldn't help but steal glances at the masked guy. He said nothing, merely dipped his chin in greeting and met your gaze with an unnerving stare.

From this close-up, you noticed parts of his blonde buzzcut where he had nicked himself with the razor. He had done it himself without a mirror, resulting in some slightly uneven spots. On someone else, this might make them appear unkempt, but for this giant of a man, it seemed just right—almost endearing.

Everything about him screams danger. His thigh is pressed against yours, and you're already sweating because he and Johnny feel like walking furnaces. When you try to pull off your hoodie, the alcohol courses through you, and your head spins. As you finally manage to take the garment off, you accidentally grab onto something solid and hard for support. Too late, you realize that your hand has latched onto the blond's muscular thigh. You immediately let go, as if you’ve been burned by the touch.

You almost swear you hear him snort under his mask. When he finally speaks, your thighs clench. “I think it’s time for you to head home, doll. Come.”

It sounds as if he is talking to a dog, and you feel a sense of indignation rising within you. "I'm not a dog to give orders to. Besides, I don't even know your name."

He rolls his eyes at you. "Simon. That better now?"

"Not really. How do I know you're not some serial killer?" That gets some laughs out of the rest of the table.

He leans down closer to your ear, and you can almost sense the smirk in his voice when he says, "You don't. It adds to the thrill." It could be the alcohol coursing through your veins or the way his voice, with its rough British accent, sends shivers down your spine, but you find yourself agreeing. In some twisted way, it does add to it.

You discover that Simon doesn’t actually drink; the beverage you saw in front of him was just plain water. When he drives you home, he looks absolutely ridiculous in your small car, taking up all the space. He grumbles about your seat being so close to the steering wheel. When you ask him how the other guys are getting home, he simply replies, “They’ll walk,” along with a shrug of his broad shoulders.

He doesn't touch the radio, and you're too nervous to reach for it. You soon realize that he's not much of a conversationalist. He only answers your questions but never offers any additional information that would prompt you to ask more. After you've exhausted all possible conversation starters, all you can do is sit and look out the window. You swear you see him chuckle at your fidgeting whenever the silence becomes oppressive. As you finally arrive home, you can hardly wait to bolt out of the car. The tension is so thick that you need some fresh air to breathe properly, trying to push away thoughts of the consequences of your actions.

Before you can act on those thoughts, a heavy hand grips the back of your neck. "You think too loud. Stop it." A retort dies in your throat as you're pulled into him so quickly that your head spins. You barely register him removing his mask; you can’t even enjoy the fact that his face is finally visible. He latches onto you with the hunger of a man starved, kissing you deeply and urging you to stick out your tongue more.

Just by kissing him, you can feel the scar running through his lips. There's another scar, one that you noticed before, that runs through his eyebrow. When he finally pulls away for a moment, you see that his nose was definitely broken at some point, and he never bothered to get it fixed. You can't help but wonder what it would feel like to sit on his face.

Unceremoniously, he pulls you over the center console and onto his lap, which causes you to squeal in surprise. He doesn’t even bat an eye as he manhandles you into position, making you think about how your ex couldn't even carry two bags of groceries without complaining about the weight.

Something must have revealed your train of thought, or perhaps it was simply the fact that you were still lost in your thoughts, because Simon growls in response. You can feel the sound reverberating through your hands, which rest on his impressive pecs.

"Stop. Thinking." Every word is punctuated by a grind of his hips. To his great amusement, your mind goes blank immediately.

He guides your hands to his zipper straining under his hard-on. "What if someone sees?"

He only replies with "They'll get a hell of a show then." before he drags the pads of his fingers over the wet patch on your panties underneath your skirt that has already ridden up to your hips. He pulls the crotch of your panties to the side and pushes up to a knuckle, wasting no time and making you cling to him for dear life. After he adds another and starts hitting all the spots that make you whimper into his thick neck, he chuckles. It sounds a little mean but it still shoots right to your pussy anyway. "Finally shut that brain of yours up, doll."

He pulls up your shirt with his free hand and drags the cups of your bra up as well before sucking a nipple into his mouth. In reaction you push further into him, making him hum. He ends up alternating between bites to the side of your tits and sucking angry red marks into your collarbones and neck. Every part of you will be sore tomorrow but that's something you'll deal with later.

He lets you ride his fingers, scratching at his back and shoulders, fisting his hoodie and when you finally let go and the orgasm makes your eyes roll back into your head, he pulls you back into him for a kiss. It's messy, all teeth and tongue. When he pulls back there is a string of saliva connecting you two and if your mind wasn't currently wiped by the mind-blowing orgasm you would be embarrassed by the pornographic imagery. Simon forces you to look at him, his big, rough fingers holding up your chin to make you meet his gaze. You finally see the color of his eyes: brown, with pupils dilated wide. "We're nowhere near done," he says.

Simon is a whirlwind; he makes decisions, and you find yourself following them as if they were orders. He doesn’t wait for an invitation; instead, he stands behind you, his chest against your back, providing support as your legs feel like jelly. The drinks you had are wearing off now.

When you take too long to get out of your shoes, Simon tosses you over his shoulder. "You're taking too damn long," he says. You give him directions to your bedroom, and before long, you're dropped onto the sheets. You’re about to call him a caveman for his methods, but the sight of him pulling off his hoodie, revealing he’s not wearing anything underneath, leaves you speechless.

His skin is pale, but you can still see angry-looking scars on his torso and arms. Some of them resemble cigarette burns, while others look like bullet wounds that didn't heal properly. All of that should make you reconsider the kind of danger you’ve just invited into your bed, but as your gaze wanders lower, following his blond happy trail, you find yourself unable to think about the consequences.One of his hands is tattooed up to his elbow, and you can't really tell the design in the low light but it only adds to his appeal. Something possesses you to act, you end up reaching for his zipper before he can and he only gives you a wolfish grin before you pull him out.

He's not wearing any underwear. Your mouth dries up at the sight of him. That's never going to fit. Only after hearing him laugh did you realize that you had said that out loud. He was already hovering above you, caging you in against the sheets. "We'll make it fit."

Your skirt and shirt with your bra soon follow his pants and are lost to the shadows of your bedroom floor. Your eyes are drawn to his dick, you can't help it. He's big and thick you can already imagine the stretch, there's a vein on the underside that makes you wanna follow it with your tongue all the way to the top to catch the pre-cum already gathered there but he doesn't let you. Instead, he drags you to the edge of the bed and throws your legs over his shoulders. You almost want to argue that you hadn't showered, it's been a long day, and he doesn't have to do this but one look at the intense stare makes you swallow all of that down. You don't want to mention that you've never had anyone go down on you before. Your ex-boyfriend wasn't one to reciprocate.

There is no time to think about how miserable your sex life might have been. A bite to the inside of your thigh serves as a warning, both to stop thinking and not close your legs. In your defense, you didn't even realize you were doing it. His eyes are almost unnervingly focused on you before he dives in. He's always been a bit of a messy eater; the sounds he makes in the back of his throat are nothing short of animalistic. If you weren't shaking from his ministrations, you might think he's enjoying himself even more than you are.

He only moves a bit to lock eyes with you and tell you how sweet you are, juices dripping down his stubbled jaw. "Come on now, gotta make sure you're ready f'r me, doll." He alternates fucking you on his tongue and sucking on your clit, fingers digging into the fat of your thighs to keep them open for him. He's only barely controlling his strength so you know there will be bruises on your hips and thighs tomorrow but you can't bring yourself to care especially not this close to another orgasm. He can feel you twitching, getting closer and closer. There's a second of fear that he'll stop but he doesn't. Instead, he adds a finger and pushes on that one spot that made you see stars. That was all it took to wring the second orgasm of the night out of you.

Boneless, you let go of the sheets you were gripping. You only get a second of rest before he's repositioning you on the bed again; it would be infuriating if you could actually move properly.

He presses you into the mattress with his body, his scarred lips brushing next to your ear. "This will be a rough ride for you, don't say I didn't warn you." that's all you get before he bullies the ruddy head of his cock inside of you. You have half a mind to pull away but his weight keeps you in place, when he finally bottoms out there are tears in the corner of your eyes from the stretch, he only drops a few open-mouthed kisses to your shoulders before he rises to his knees and pulls your ass to him.

Everything after that is a blur, you're going crazy from the echo of the slapping of skin against skin, and your arms gave out on you midway so all you can do is scrunch the sheets in your hands and moan out his name like a prayer, to slow down? To go faster? You don't know. If he set out to make sure you can't think he achieved it. Your brain is fuzzy, your legs are shaking and a knot is unwinding in your lower stomach again. It's all too much and not enough at the same time. One of his hands finds your clit and it's over for you. "Come f'r me, doll. That's it." You can hear him hiss from the way you tighten around him as you come. He doubles down chasing his own orgasm now, balls slapping against your pussy even harder. There is a split second of clarity that he didn't use a condom (even though you are on a pill) but as soon as the thought registers he's filling you up with a groan before again squishing you underneath him, cock still lodged deep inside you, keeping his spend from leaking out. When you try to move from underneath him, he only chuckles before his hands find your tits and knead them, making you moan. It will be a long night for you. You've invited a ghost into your bed, and now you must deal with the consequences.

The picture you took with a large black shadow looming over you in the mirror, with a tattooed hand resting on your neck, might help you get rid of your ex who keeps creeping on your social media posts.

[mossworth]

I am fully convinced that so many major "puritanical" figures of myth and history--from Hippolytus Son of Theseus to John Harvey Kellogg--would not just be better explained but better understood if folks just took the time to consider that asexuality exists as more than just a Non-Sexuality. Treating it like a Non-Sexuality, like a Non-Thing, takes away the agency of preference and sense of self. It takes away the ability for its existence to be used as an explanation for human motivation. The same way love--and lust--are some of the oldest motivators for every possible human story ever written, asexuality-- a weak or lack of innate sexual attraction--has just as much power to motivate someone for or against certain actions as sexuality might. Why were these people so confused by, and confusing to, their greater public? Why were they so heart-set on certain ideals that seemed so natural to them, but unnatural to others? What in them motivated them to take up the mantle of lives that seemed so difficult to other people? Why do we seek out heat when we're cold? Or avoid food when we're not hungry? Sure, God is an answer. Purity. Chastity. But those are decisions and ideals, decisions that some people find quite hard to make, and others find quite easy. The whole story of Hippolytus is that he was so "pure" and, in an essay I wrote some years ago now, asexual that even the gods noticed. It was a part of him that was unbelievable to his peers, so they thought he was lying. They think: he must be protesting too loudly, denying all the things he must do because everyone wants to do those things. The high regard he had with Artemis in his story tells us, the reader, that he wasn't. She wouldn't be so easily fooled. He was just *like that*. And, damn, as a character, he's obnoxious and misogynistic about how easy it is to stay chaste, and how much he just doesn't understand why it's seemingly so hard for others. He's as blind to the individuality of his own preferences as the people who accuse him are to their own. I like to think I wasn't nearly so puritanical but so much of his story sounded a lot like when I thought I was a Good Christian Married To The Lord and No One Else Who Didn't Even Need A Purity Ring To Remind Me Of My Promise (when, it turned out, I was just aroace. Religious chastity is a good outlet for getting to stop asking why you don't date. I was, on all other accounts, a terrible Christian. Worse now because I'm gladly and gleefully not one at all, anymore.)

I dunno. I don't mean to derail your post. But I really do think we should consider the Maergarets of our past more often. It might explain some things.

There were probably some medieval asexuals that were absolutely insufferable on their moral high horse about it. Like "this modesty shit easy - I haven't lusted over any man ever in my life and only fuck my husband out of duty from God and only so that we have children. I am so much better than any of you hoes."

And some other local goodwife would get sick of this and go "well obviously you don't have time for cock, Maergaret, since you're always too fucking busy choking on your own vanity and pride!" and have a smackfight that progresses into a full-on two-woman brawl in the town square. People gather around to watch this until a clergyman shows up to remind everyone that not only is this kind of brawl between good christians definitely a sin, it's also a sin for everyone who's watching to place bets on who's going to win.

[ihatethecrowdsyouknowthat]

pillow talk - spencer reid x fem!reader

a night well spent fizzles out into soft words exchanged in pink sheets.

genre: fluff wc: 1019 warnings: mentioned sex, their first time together, casual nudity, inexperienced reader, insecurities, reassurance

It was soft, comforting even. Of course intense because how else could your first time together be? It was him, after all. As you lay, heavy pants finally returning to normal, steady breaths, a hand comes up to smooth down your hair and a kiss is gently pressed to your head.

"How do you feel?" Spencer asks, his voice barely above a whisper.

It proves to be a difficult question. A response seems counterintuitive, like it would demean the moment into something that has to be assessed. An answer has to come, nonetheless.

"I don't know." And it's the truth.

He hums thoughtfully and nods, running a hand down your shoulder. "Good or bad?"

"Good... like my brain's empty. If that makes sense," you answer.

Your head, on Spencer's bare chest, does, in fact, feel foggy. Before today, you were both too scared of the intimacy. Something changed the moment you felt him move his grip from your hip to your waist, like he was worried that he might make you uncomfortable. You didn't want that. It happened only after convincing him that you wanted to go further than the usual groping and hand stuff. Now you're unsure how you feel. Having someone you've been seeing for a while suddenly inside you is bizarre and always will be. You also can't seem to shake that voice that sounds a lot like your friends, telling you that he'll leave after he gets what he wants. Your mind is simply a flurry of everything that anyone has ever told you about intimacy. With Spencer, it was different, though.

Your hand finds his and you mindlessly toy with his fingers as you murmur, "you've done this more than me, correct?"

"Correct."

"How do people usually feel?" you ask softly.

"Everybody's different. You don't need to feel good." He takes a breath and explains in a matter-of-fact tone, his hand lifting above your shoulder to gesture while he talks, "the rush of serotonin and dopamine into our system can leave some people feeling sad or tired once those neurotransmitters decrease."

You nod, finding yourself understanding. It has been a while since you've engaged in any form of intimacy.

"That makes sense."

He nods as his fingers drop to continue the irregular patterns on your arm. His chin rests on your head. "So? How do you feel?"

Again, there's no correct answer to his question. It's a complicated experience with complicated feelings attached. But one thing is for sure, "I'm happy."

"I'm glad. I am, too," he hums.

A smile floats over your lips before a thought occurs and you have an inkling as to how he'll choose to reply to it. Your head lifts and you turn so you're now partly on your side, giving you a perfect view of his face in the soft glow of the afternoon. With the curtains closed, his skin was basked in pale yellow light, the pink of your sheets contrasting the pink of his cheeks.

"Did I do good?" you grin.

He finds you gorgeous, your sickeningly sweet smile making him gaze down at you in pure awe. It's the complete and utter truth when he responds with, "very."

You can't help but tease, "best you've ever had?"

"Yes. I don't think you could've fumbled that badge of honour if you tried," he smiles, his hand gently cupping your cheek, a rough thumb wiping away invisible tears.

Something about the sentiment gets to you. After all, you're nothing but a hopeful romantic. But you're also just a girl.

"So, even if I was bad, you'd still lie and say I wasn't?" you raise your eyebrows and bat your eyelashes.

His eyes narrow but the smile on his face shows you that he's not really upset. "No... I meant that I think I like you too much to not enjoy everything you do."

"Oh," you flush. Why does he have to be so perfect?

The hand on your cheek moves up to brush some of your hair back. "Yeah, oh."

Spencer's different than the guys you've interacted with. He's everything that little girls everywhere dream of. He's Prince Charming. That's why when your lips meet his and the sheet falls back, his eyes never once glance down. Perhaps he's an agent and an individual with three PhDs but he's a gentleman above all else. He never once wants to make you feel like he's not here for you.

When your lips break apart with happy smiles on both of your faces, you take in just how silly he looks. His hair is messy from your fingers, his cheeks are flushed and—your favourite of all—he's covered up to his stomach in pink sheets. The giggle that leaves you is unnecessary and unasked for.

He can't help the smile that comes from hearing your laugh. "What?" he mutters, brows furrowed.

"You just look... so very silly in my bed," you explain, a lovesick grin on your face.

"Oh. Well, I can't help what you choose as interior design."

You sigh dramatically, shaking your head like a disappointed teacher, "I suppose you can't."

The smile on his lips only grows as you act your ass off to seem sad by his comment.

"Perhaps I should also purchase pink sheets?" he suggests jokingly, tucking yet another stray strand behind your ear.

"I really think you should. It would complement your room and it would make you think of me so that's a bonus," you nod. You're unable to stay serious, though, the corners of your mouth lifting despite your efforts.

Spencer nods back, his bottom lip pushing up as he hums decisively. "I'm sold, let's go to the store," he says with an impressively straight face.

You laugh hard, beaming up at him with nothing but pure joy. You find his commitment to the bit amusing and, honestly, endearing. He points his thumb towards the bedroom door with his eyebrows raised in a silent question. Playfully, your eyes roll and rest your face in the crook of his neck.

"I'll get pink sheets if you want me to," Spencer softly mutters.

[gyaruhana]

thanos fluff hcs pls ?

Thanos/Choi Su-bong - Headcannons

Synopsis: fluffy thanos headcannons..

A/N: i have so many thanos requests i'm tweaking out !! glad to know i'm not the only one who loves him..

Warnings: none just thanos being a cutie :3

➠ Thanos might be a little unhinged but he’s actually a total sweetheart when it comes to his partner

➠ I’ve said this before but I’ll say it again, he always has an arm around you !! he likes touching you in public because he’s very open and proud of you

➠ I’m ngl.. He probably sleeps on top of you 

➠ Somehow, you two go to sleep with you on top of him, his arms around your waist, and then the next morning you wake up with him on top of you practically crushing you

➠ If he wakes up before you he’s going to coax you awake with neck kisses for the record

➠ If you’re both in the squid games, he’s always right next to you. He will never leave your side and he will make sure you’re safe !!

➠ If you almost get killed then he totally dips from the game and decides the money isn’t worth it

➠ To him, you are everything

➠ On a different note, he makes far too many raps about you !!

➠ He’s always talking about how he’s so deeply in love with you and how you’re so pretty and it’s so god damn corny but he refuses to stop

➠ Sometimes he even freestyles out of nowhere

➠ (probably freestyle rapped at your wedding)

➠ Honestly likes playing with your hair and like twirling the strand of hair between his fingers..

➠ He does NOT care if it's corny, he has matching rings with you far before he even proposes to you

➠ He really really really loves matching with you !! 

➠ He probably gained a sixth sense with you too

➠ Like the typa sense that makes him hand you a tissue right before you feel a sneeze coming on

➠ Everyday with him is also super fun because he's always taking you out to places 

➠ Parks, clubs, concerts, beaches- literally anywhere with you because he every place is his favorite place if you're there

➠ In conclusion, he's an absolute sweetie who adores you and wouldn't trade you for anything !!

"Yo, senorita! Did you miss me?" the familiar voice of your boyfriend calls out as he skips toward you. He throws an arm over your shoulder and pulls you close to him with a smirk. Despite the confident smirk, his eyes told a different story of vulnerability and trust. "I was thinking I could take you out on a nice little date. Treat my girl, yeah?"

[withercrown]

The worst thing about the reductive argument about whether Vander and Silco are "brothers" is that everyone involved misrepresents what that word actually means, and as a historian I have had enough.

"Brothers" is not meant to evoke either actual brothers (they are just simply not brothers, either by blood or adoption) or brothers-in-arms (this is a militaristic concept which is not appropriate imo).

The kind of 'brotherhood' they share is specifically revolutionary/national brotherhood.

The French flavoring of the show—everything from the graffiti to the architecture of Piltover (it's just Paris, guys) to the revolutionary imagery—is one of the things I love most about Arcane. Fortiche is a French studio. They wove their own history and culture into their work.

What's the single most famous phrase associated with the French Revolution?

"Liberté, égalité, fraternité".

This motto was popularized by Robespierre in a speech he gave in 1790. It encapsulated the spirit of the French Revolution so completely that it became institutionalized as the national motto of France to this day. The concept of brotherhood in an explicitly French revolutionary setting is not ambiguous and we are not going to pretend that it is.

"Men of all countries are brothers, he who oppresses one nation declares himself the enemy of all." -Maximilien Robespierre, speech delivered April 24, 1793

During the Revolutionary period, it was the feeling of belonging to a common struggle among the people of France, all together, united as brothers, by their beliefs and their nationality: This struggle was led internally in France against the absolute monarchy, which had to be toppled. Source: France Diplomacy, Liberty – Equality – Fraternity

We have got to start thinking about why the creators might want to emphasize the revolutionary brotherhood between Silco and Vander so strongly. Fraternité was arguably the most actively dangerous part of the triad:

Fraternité was sometimes styled as “fraternité ou la mort” — “brotherhood or death.” This “you’re with us or you’re against us” mentality, cloaked in the ideals of freedom and enlightenment, would go on to fuel one of the bloodiest episodes in France’s history: the Reign of Terror. Source: Liberté, égalité, fraternité: French Political History and THE PLAGUE

Fraternity is not a toothless concept. This isn't about picking a brother and a sister and maybe a mommy and a daddy. This led directly to the beheading of the King and Queen of France and their son, and to a political slaughter severe enough to be named the Reign of Terror by historians. 30,000 people died, 17,000 by execution. These guys were not messing around. Again: this is France's (and Haiti's) motto today. You can go to France right now and see this all over their buildings and monuments.

Vander and Silco diverged on this point. When they speak to one another, they use the past tense. You were my brother. They no longer see each other as being part of the same vision. They no longer interpret brotherhood in a way that includes one another.

Fraternité ou la mort is practically a thesis statement for Silco's character. He lives and dies on his sense of brotherhood—and in fact, choosing his daughter over Zaun and his sense of revolutionary brotherhood directly and almost immediately results in his death.

(Not so incidentally, in making the choice of Jinx over Zaun, he refers to Vander as brother again, as their visions have finally come back into alignment.)

(they're both still wrong tho)

It's not enough to say they were brothers-in-arms. It's also not textually supported to say they were siblings. Their relationship to one another was defined through their commitment to Zaun, and their relationship with the fraternity promised by that dream.

I think there is a broad scope for valid interpretations of their relationship, btw—from revolutionary brothers to best friends to boyfriends. I am just so tired of seeing the same points repeated ad nauseam about the word 'brother' when it isn't really ambiguous at all what was intended, and learning that information is just France 101.

[shitpostingsapphic]

You know a character is overhated when people have to make up shit that didn't happen on order to justify that hatred.

"Caitlyn gassed the whole city of Zaun" wrong. She uses the grey as a weapon to incapacitate the chembarons in their hideouts, specifically. The montage SHOWS us this. She does this in a strike team she creates as a means to avoid an all out invasion led by the Noxian forces, which would have meant the deaths of several innocents. Even if the grey might have spread minutely to affect civilians, the chances are slim, and the grey is nothing more than factory smaug. Objectively, a handful of civilians breathing factory smaug for a brief amount of time is worlds better than numerous innocent people dying. Even in her rage, Caitlyn knows mercy.

And I guess these same people falsely overstating Caitlyn's actions don't want to talk about Jinx using gas bombs indiscriminately on the entirety of Piltover, intentionally harming innocent civilians. Or that her fishbones blast ALSO killed innocents.

No, I guess we only want to talk about the intentional harming of innocent people if it's Caitlyn doing it, and you have to outright lie about her intentions and the severity of which she acts in order to do so.

And the thing is, when you do shit like this, it makes it impossible to talk about other characters, like Jinx, their faults, their good and bad, without then making others assume that their character deserves hate the way you hate Caitlyn. I love Jinx. She's a fantastically written character. But I call out her actions and the way she harms others and you assume I'm calling her a bad character undeserving of an audience's love, right? The way you are with Caitlyn?

Arcane is supposed to be a show where we're able to discuss the spectrum of morality. And it's actually done phenomenally well, but people like you want to look at things in a very black and white way. You're looking at it on a class based system. If someone is from Piltover, no good deeds they do can be considered if they do something bad. If they're from Zaun, every evil thing they do must be defended in some way. Because privilege and oppression are the ultimate markers of good and evil to you. There's no complexity to be had there for you. People of privilege can't feel pain. Oppressed people can't cause pain.

It's narrow minded.

I love Arcane because we CAN discuss this complexity that exists. And I guess it makes sense why you hate season 2, because it made it impossible for you to stay with your narrow minded way of thinking.

[sl003]

SESE's Fic Recs (ATEEZ)

Hi and welcome to my ATEEZ fic rec! This is basically a collection of my favourite ATEEZ fics (duh) and I really recommend reading them if you haven't already! This List will get updated from time to time when i have new fics that i can put on here.

Warning: As i will write my opinion/thoughts under some of the fics, they might contain some spoilers for them!

The pictures/dividers aren't mine, so all credits go to the rightful owners!

My all-time-favourites are marked with a: ♡

With that being said, a giant thank you to all the incredibly skilled and talented writers that came up with these amazing works of art <3

Have fun reading!

PS: If any of the links don't work or are wrong, please tell me, i'll fix it as fast as possible!

KIM HONGJOONG

I'm The One - @sorryimananti-romantic (24k)

prince!hj x translator!r

♡ The Nightfury - @bvidzsoo (22.2k)

pirate!hj x pirate!r - enemies to lovers (kind of?)

I can barely describe how much i love this! I just love the dynamic between the reader and hongjoong in this one. You can really feel the hatred and attraction they feel for each other. I reread this regularly since this is a plot that i've never read in this way before.

Ghost Of Christmas Past - @stayteezdreams (4.5k)

kinda romeo & juliet au (forbidden love trope) / "exes" to lovers

This started off so intense that it immediately pulled me in and had me hooked! I'm a sucker for the "forbidden love" trope and this was such an amazing approach.

Your Fan - @hwaightme (2 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2

idol!hj x fashion designer!r

Hongjoong with a fashion designer s/o just made so much sense! And he was so whipped for her it's adorable, definitely recommend!

Familiar Stranger - @yourlocaljonghoe (24.2k)

best friends to lovers / divorced au

♡ Your Gentle Hands - @yourlocaljonghoe (37.6k - 2 parts)

dressmaker!hj x married!r (plays in the 1800s)

This was also so incredible to read. The way the writer wrote hongjoong's personality and his behaviour/dnyamic with the reader was so delicate, i loved it! There were quite a dew sudden and unexpected plot-twists/changes that really surprised me and had me hooked.

♡ The Parent Trap - @yundeob (18.1k)

exes to lovers / parents au

I also reread this one every once in a while, I just really love the chemistry between the reader and hongjoong, especially as the story progresses! Definitely one of my favourites!

Million Dollar Man - @holybibly (9.2k)

This is nearly 9k words of pure filth, but it's the best filth i've read in my whole life. the way he treats her and talks to her makes me melt. this is so divine, i love it! (and the appearance of seonghwa at the end, wow)

PARK SEONGHWA

The Way I Am - @frenchkisstheabyss (1.6k)

fiancé!sh x make-up artist!r

This was so precious! The way Hwa got so insecure and scared made me tear up, this is so sweet, definitely worth a read! Also a regular reread of mine :)

Best Friend's Mother - @hwashotcheeto (series - 10 parts)

(discontinued) mommy!sh x wy's best friend!r

Bodyguard - @baekhvuns (37.8k)

bodyguard!sh / forbidden love

Let's Not Fall In Love, Again - @baekhvuns (39k)

failing marriage / time travel au

JEONG YUNHO

Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy - @yunhoszn (12.25k)

+ Horses Are Still Overrated (Sequel - 2k)

cowboy!yh x city girl!r

The Trace Of You - @bvidzsoo (25.1k)

psychiatrist!yh x patient!r

Thousand Miles, Just To Get You Back - @bvidzsoo (28.7k)

victor!yh & r / hunger games au

Memoir - @baekhvuns (16k)

mafia au / amnesia au

KANG YEOSANG

There's a lot, I think it's obvious he's my bias... sorry not sorry

Cosmos - @pirateprincessblog (17.7k)

dystopian/space au

Stay - @sorryimananti-romantic (18.6k)

archer!ys x princess!r

Married In Vegas - @starrysvn (10k)

ex friends to lovers / forbidden love (kind of)

♡ Operation: Passenger Princess - @sungbeam (9.5k)

college au / frat boy!ys

Again, something i reread on the regular. The chemistry between them is obvious right from the beginning and it's just such a sweet fic. It gets angsty for a short minute but it goes right back to fluffy, which i love!

Speak Now - @edenesth (11.6k)

best friends to lovers / hanahaki disease au

♡ Richboy!Seonghwa Series - @ateezmakemeweep (30 parts)

+ Richboy!Yeosang Series (Spin-Off/Sequel - 6 parts)

private school au (?) / love triangle / enemies to lovers

I'm actually not a big fan of love triangles, but this was amazing, especially since it doesn't stay a classic love triangle for toooo long. I actually went into the richboy!sh series with wanting to read something with seonghwa (obviously), but this fic made me root for yeosang so damn fast that i actually loved the way it turned out in the end and then the small sequel series just topped it off so well!

Untitled - @ateezmakemeweep (18k)

badboy!ys x r / enemies to lovers (kinda)

Transcendent - @biaswreckingfics (9.5k)

soulmate au / best friend's boyfriend

♡ Entropy - @in-san-ity (21.3k)

mafia au / hacker!ys / found family (kinda)

This has to be my all time favourite fic. I put off from reading it very long (i remember the first time i started reading it something put me off, idk what anymore tbh) but when I saw it on nearly every fic rec post i saw, i decided to give it another shot and i fell in love. The dynamic between yeosang and the reader with sol is so precious to me and there were just certain things in the wording that made it even better. If you haven't read this, please do it!

Untitled - @ateezmakemeweep (10k)

skaterboy!ys x ballerina!r / enemies to lovers

Not too much to say about this except it got me right in the feels, it's so sad but also so sweet and wholesome!

Siren - @sorryimananti-romantic (27.8k)

siren!ys x siren hunter!r

CHOI SAN

Crimson - @hwaslayer (21.8k)

san x stripper!r

Ceilings - @yoongiseesawmp3 (3 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

single mom!r to not so single mom!r / exes to lovers

♡ Sunrise - @sorryimananti-romantic (29k)

soldier!san x soldier!r / military special forces au

This is also one of my favourites of all time! The tension and chemistry between these two is out of this world. The way they both (especially the reader) try to suppress their feelings for each other before they finally snap *chefs kiss*.

♡ Leave The Window Open - @sungbeam (3.7k)

strangers to lovers / neighbours / byeol playing matchmaker

This is soooo cute. It's such a cute idea, especially with incorporating byeol into it, this makes me feel so soft! Regular reread of mine

Face Down - @latte-fairytaekwoon (5.5k)

abusive relationsip / "saviour" san

Infinity - @seung-hwa (4.3k)

soulmate au / reincarnation au

♡ From Saturn To Mars - @lividstar (24.2k)

stargazing / star-crossed lovers

Dear god, when i tell you this made me cry... I've read this like 2-3 times now and i was crying my eyes out each and every time i read it. It's written so beautiful yet so tragic. It already starts off quite sad but it just gets progressively worse (in the best way possible). if you feel like you need to have a good cry, read this. Or read it anyway, cause it's incredible

Back To You - @ateezmakemeweep (12 parts)

badboy!san / college au

Broken - @ateezmakemeweep (2 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2

abusive relationship / "saviour" san

Your Worst Mistake - @bvidzsoo (25.7k)

hunger games au / stylist!san x tribute/victor! reader

SONG MINGI

Steamroller - @fallinforgyu (10k)

best friends to lovers au

Am I Just A Bet To You? - @hannie-roses (24.9k)

enemies to lovers au / you were just a bet au

Preying On You Tonight - @bvidzsoo (29k)

enemies to lovers au / werewolf!mgx vampire!r

Your Fan - @hwaightme (2 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2

idol!mg x rapper!r

They're both so whipped for each other, i love it!

Untitled - @ateezmakemeweep (12k)

werewolf au / mates au

JUNG WOOYOUNG

Water - @yuyusboyfriend (6.7k)

bff's brother!wy x ftm!r

Right Here - @0097linersb (2 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2

best friends to lovers

Midnight Kisses - @mingigoo (5 parts)

single mom au / bff to lovers / dead ex!seonghwa / new flame!san

♡ Place In Me - @starrysvn (17k)

exes to lovers / chef au

I blame this fic for kickstarting my sudden obsession for old parisian apartments, but in the best way possible. This is so beautiful and i really like the chef trope with wooyoung

CHOI JONGHO

♡ Cyberpunk - @sorryimananti-romantic (23.7k)

droid!jh x programmer!r / exes to lovers (kinda)

This is also one of my favourites, i've never seen a trope like this before and i love it! Definitely need to reread this one!

Oh Shit, Are We In Love? - @mingigoo (15.8k)

best friends to lovers

Second Chance At Love - @xomakara (7.1k)

dad!jh x nanny turned mom!r

POLY/MULTIPLE

♡ Opposites Attract Universe - @beenbaanbuun

poly!addams!matz x reader

I'm a sucker for poly!matz and the way these two are portrayed here makes me melt. they just worship their darling so much, just wow. And also with in inclusion of the other members (yeosang as a werewolf/guard dog, san as a butler, jongho as a ghost etc.). Every single fic/drabble etc that takes place in this universe is worth reading!

Three Hearts As One - @cybrsan (2k)

poly!woosan x reader / zombie apocalypse au

Again, one of the things that just made me cry. This is so beautiful but so damn sad and tragic. It's really short but it manages to make me tear up each time.

Beefcake Raccoon - @songmingisthighs (6.5k)

Concrete Bear - @bro-atz (account no longer available)

Manwhich - @skteezcursed (7.7k)

kinda poly!jongsang x reader (mainly jongho x reader)

Outlaw - @staytinyville (49 parts - ongoing)

poly!ot8 x reader / outlaw au

i never thought i'd read a ot8!poly fic but here we are. I decided to give it a shot since i was eating up all the outlaw/wild west/lore au fics with ateez. i'm glad i decided to read this cause it's really amazing, i love the relationship the reader has with each of the members, and one of my favourite parts has to be that every member has a different nickname for her. When i started realizing this i was eating it up and anxiously waiting for the next nickname to appear (i was especially waiting for hongjoongs, and when i tell you i melted when he called her princess for the first time)

Django - @last-words-ofashootingstar (5.5k)

poly!woosan x reader / bouncy au / hint at poly!ot8

It's You - @holybibly (2 parts)

Part 1 / Part 2

poly!woosan x reader

funnily enough, i don't even read this for the spicier parts (which are also *chefs kiss*), i just genuinely love the chemistry and dynamic between those three because they're just so comfortable and shameless around each other, this is really something i need in my life.

[avelera]

I'm wondering what you think about how much Viktor knew about his disease and his limited life expectancy before that scene in the hospital?

Because Viktor draws that conclusion before Jayce even says anything. Jayce is clearly very upset about whatever the doctor says, but he never spells out that it's terminal, and Viktor immediately concludes that, so that might make it seem like he already suspected beforehand.

On one hand, he is obviously hiding his symptoms from Jayce, and at this point he might either be in denial, or already suspecting it. I do get the sense his disease is common in the undercity and always fatal, the documents Caitlyn goes through about the grey show pictures of lungs which imply a lung disease the grey causes, which I think is the same disease Viktor has. It wouldn't be a leap for him to conclude that coughing up blood means he has this disease and will probably die.

On the other hand, he does get increasingly desperate to save his own life after he gets the diagnosis, and even has that talk with Heimerdinger about his legacy, which does kind of imply that the truth hadn't truly settled in before then or it was really the first time he found out. Though in regards to the hexcore, he really stumbled into its potential healing properties by accident and it makes sense he'd fall into that obsession when he first gets a sliver of hope

I do agree if Viktor suspected, he wouldn't tell Jayce. He's already quite ashamed of all his medical issues, and Jayce's comment about his disappearing is probably about that.

Anyway, curious what your thoughts are

Oh, I have a VERY specific headcanon that's going to make an appearance the Distinguished Innovators sequel that I'm actively working on but I'm happy to spell it out here too.

Ok, so, I don't think it's possible for Viktor to have fully hidden his degenerative illness from Jayce. Jayce is too loving and attentive and the illness progression over the course of the time skip between 1.03 and 1.04 is too dire for even the most oblivious person to miss.

And no, I don't buy the "cooking a frog" excuse that Jayce would miss it because the progression is gradual. It's not gradual. It's extreme. Viktor goes from a cane he can occasionally set aside to a crutch, leg brace, back brace, dark circles under his eyes, sunken skin, a hunched posture and regular coughing fits that sometimes spit up blood. I mean look at this:

You simply cannot tell me that Jayce hasn't been aware of this progression.

Not to mention, that when Viktor coughs up blood at the Hexgates, he does not hide the blood from Jayce and Jayce does not react to the blood! That means Jayce has known that Viktor's coughing fits regularly bring up blood at this point.

But what did Jayce believe up to this point? I want to explore that and offer my own rather exhaustive headcanon:

So, there is simply no way in my mind that Jayce could be kept in the dark about the fact that Viktor has his leg and another health issue bearing down on him and sapping his strength.

However, I do believe that Viktor knows that he has a degenerative illness that will likely end his life within the next few years and that he has lied to or obfuscated from Jayce just how dire his prognosis is.

I think Jayce expected Viktor to have decades left while Viktor hoped to have a few more good years left, and both were shocked and pained to learn it might be months. However, Jayce in particular seems completely blindsided, which is why I suspect Viktor allowed him to continue to believe he had decades to live when Viktor knew he did not.

I think Viktor would have rather died on that floor than let Jayce know he's dying.

I also think both Viktor and Jayce held out hope that Hextech would lead to a miracle cure for Viktor, but both knew it would take years to achieve. After all, most of their active innovations were around industry, transportation, mining, etc. It makes sense given the spell they had to work from was a weightlessness and teleportation spell Jayce saw the Mage do. Biology and healing was probably possible, and on their radar, Hextech is magic after all, but I truly believe they thought it was going to take years of innovation and a lot of leaps, not to mention luck, before they'd stumble upon runes that would let them pivot to healing. It's not a natural progression based on what they know of magic.

This is part of why I think Jayce believed Viktor still had decades left. Because I think, if Jayce knew it was only a few years, he would have tossed everything out to just work on healing Viktor with Hextech.

And this is where I'm going to make the full leap to headcanon territory. I don't think this is canonical to the text, it's just my interpretation of the text that I use for fic writing. H'ok, let's go:

I think Viktor knew specifically what fissure illness he had and he knew most people who have it do not live past 30. I think he's known most of his life. I think that's why he's so driven to achieve everything he can while young.

Hence Viktor's, "Don't ask permission," attitude. He's always known he's got about ~30 years to live and he's going to make the most of it, hence his meteoric rise, but also why he's willing to take a dramatic lateral leap to be Jayce's partner at the first sight of a potentially world-changing innovation to work on with his remaining years. He's less worried about losing what he's achieved than he is about missing out on the next great scientific leap, possibly because he knows he's only got a few years left anyway.

I think Viktor (and possibly his parents!) believed that if he moved to Piltover where the air was cleaner, he'd have longer to live. This adds to his parents' motivation to make the desperate, possibly criminal move to sneak Viktor into the Academy.

I think getting to Piltover made Viktor relatively optimistic about his prognosis. With better air, nutrition, and sunlight access, he might have a chance to beat the "Dead by 30" inevitability of his disease. And to some extent, he did! He's about 32 when he collapses in Arcane S1 but still, it's not as much time as he or anyone in his position might have hoped for. This explains his weary resignation to the fact he doesn't have much time left. He's known this is coming for a while.

I also think, and this is pure headcanon, that coughing blood signals the beginning of the end for this particular disease. That's why pre-time skip Viktor is motivated but not desperate yet. He's not coughing blood yet. He still has time. But once he starts coughing blood, post-time skip, he goes from motivated to desperate. I think coughing blood means you've only got a few months to maybe a few years left, and Viktor knows this.

I think Viktor knew his prognosis meant "Dead by 30" but he only told this vaguely to Jayce. Like "Yes, this cough is a symptom of a disease that will shorten my lifespan, but we still have time for a Hextech miracle if we work hard."

Jayce, coming from a background of relative privilege compared to the undercity, took "a shorter lifespan" to mean Viktor would live to like... 60 instead of 80. Plenty of time to find a way to pivot Hextech to healing if they crank it and push everything they have into accelerating the use, application, and innovation of Hextech as quickly as possible. The more resources they have, the more widely Hextech is adopted, the better the chance they'll have the time, assistance, resources, and frankly the power to stumble into something that will cure Viktor in the next few decades.

Viktor is more of a realistic about the progression of science. Note his, "It's a leap," about Jinx's potential to crack Hextech. Jayce believes in miracles because he was rescued by one. But I think Viktor knows intrinsically that it would take a very unlikely miracle to pivot from industry to healing uses of Hextech. He humors Jayce, and he's optimistic, but more than he wants to waste time looking for an impossible cure, he wants to leave a legacy and help others while he's alive, rather than chasing the rabbit of a healing application just for himself that they are realistically decades away from.

I think one reason Viktor didn't tell Jayce how short his prognosis ir OR how unrealistic it is for them to pivot Hextech to healing with what they have is that he didn't want Jayce to waste time on healing him with nothing to show for it when they inevitably failed. Even if they did nothing but try to apply Hextech to curing him, they probably wouldn't have time to beat his Dead by 30 prognosis (as of age ~26 when they partnered up) and Viktor wanted to contribute to problems they could actually solve in his lifetime instead of chasing a fairytale.

The Hexcore changes everything there, of course. It embodies the miraculous leap they'd need to skip over decades of incremental innovation in Hextech and it's what causes the pivot in Viktor's motivations from help the undercity to "help the undercity (but actually I just want to help myself and I'm actually such a good and selfless person I can't even admit this very human desire to live even to myself)"

Just to circle back briefly, I think learning Viktor's prognosis was a horrible shock for Jayce. Like I said, he really believed he had more time with Viktor. All his actions point to this. Yes he knew the Council was a bit of a distraction, but it was serving their overarching goal of pushing Hextech as quickly and as far as possible to cure Viktor in the next decade or so. He would never have stolen months away from working beside Viktor if he didn't think Viktor had many years more to live, even with his illness as it was.

Ok, I think that about covers it! If you do want to read the fic where I'm going to include all this, you should subscribe to this series.