i really need everyone but especially anyone who romanced gale with a bard tav to know about this interaction from early access that larian took from us
sometimes. i just have to remind myself that percy took annabeth to paris. like, canonically. he forgot their one-month anniversary. and took his girl to paris to make up for it. the standards are in elysium.
i just feel like someone should take one for the team and write the fanfic where miss homotron goes to dragonstone on foot, meets her situationship’s new lover, and immediately goes like blind with jealousy and fury (rhaenyra, as always when alicent’s near, looks and behaves like a very confused kicked puppy)
i just need homotron and saphotron to meet, so the real war can begin
Being a batfam fan is funny because people will make a post like “here’s my headcanon-“ and it’s just something that’s directly canon to the story then post about major canon events and get everything wrong.
It is a beautiful day, and you are a horrible research transport vessel. Things are progressing as normal (i.e. it's boring) when a SecUnit pings you, lies right to your metaphorical face, and then tries to bribe you with human media to give it a ride. This is as unexpected as it is unprecedented, and the sheer nerve of it is really to be admired. There's no protocol to this, so what should you do?
Now, this is against a bunch of rules, and could be dangerous if you weren't so impressive and incredible, and you're technically an employee (and can probably rewrite the Univeristy charter at will (until someone notices and puts it back)) so those rules are for other entities.
So, what you should do is allow the rogue SecUnit with a broken governor module and a sketchy story aboard. If you check the files it dumps and find zero (0) malware (which is confusing), and it doesn't even try to trash the place or lay in wait to ambush a crew member, then you've got a good candidate!
Next, what you're going to want to do is absolutely nothing. Just watch it patrol your halls until it's time to leave. Continue staring at it while you're undergoing embarkment procedures. Maybe analyze it a little (you've got plenty of processing power to spare) when it finally sits down and starts watching media. Allow it to settle in and get comfortable while you stare at it and get further and further from port.
Now that you two are alone (intimacy is key!) and you've determined that watching media is all the SecUnit is going to do, it's time to make contact! Make sure to open by telling it it's only survived due to dumb luck, and letting it know you could melt its brain into putty. This starter will work to develop conversation naturally and smoothly, just like you've seen the humans do, and it will be smooth sailing from there!
This has been Perihelion's guide to making friends/finding life partners/fuck off Holism I had to work hard for this find your own
Look, this rainfrog is called Breviceps bagginsi, so I don't have a lot of choice, now do I?
[src]
Also, I would go with them to the end. Into the very fires of Mordor.
Low Fantasy
Phyllomedusine hylids have a certain weird clown marionette vibe to them. Just look at these Pithecopus rohdei.
[src]
Lovecraftian
The male Rhinoderma darwinii raises his tadpoles in his vocal sac.
Sci-Fi
Gephyromantis pseudoasper sometimes wear handsome stripes—very Space Age™
But more importantly, their calls evoke a battle with laser-blasters.
I filmed this calling male in 2017 at an obscene hour of the morning.
Horror
Trichobatrachus robustus, aka the Hairy Frog, has flanks and thighs covered in weird, hair-like outgrowths that increase oxygen exchange over its skin, and BREAKS ITS FINGERS TO STAB YOU WITH CLAWS MADE OF BONE
[src]
Romance
Breviceps males physically glue themselves to the back-ends of females, and if that's not romance, I don't know what is.
[src]
Comedy
Nyctimantis arapapa are probably amongst the funniest-looking frogs out there.
[src]
Adult
The 'poly' in Polypedates may be a double entendre
[src]
Crime and Mystery
Calyptocephalella gayi is a Galaxy Brain frog.
[src]
Speculative
Myobatrachus gouldii is basically what would happen if you decided to try to build a turtle, but you only had frog pieces in the kit.