#AND ASIDE FROM THAT YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP
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AURGH auwarghh the autistic parental trauma... the epi was wacky hijinks then dropped this on us out of nowhere... (sobs) laios... laiiiiooooos
#he just like me fr#dungeon meshi#laios touden#actuallyautistic#aphelion.txt#dunmeshi#laios#autism things#im definitely chewing on that marcille lore/angst too but the laios nightmare sequence hit close to home!!#dont think falin had a great relationship with their parents either#i mean aside from being willing to abandon her in the dream. idk if that's 100% accurate to how they acted.#it didnt seem like her affinity for ghosts was gonna go down real good in that flashback#also i need to write that post abt how falin has girl autism (dont ask me what that means unless you want to enter an unskippable cutscene)#actually its pretty easy to hit most dunmeshi chars w the hammer of autism laios is just the most obvious#senshi hyperfixating and having meltdowns (Waterwalk Incident.) and low empathy for people until he's gotten Attached#i need to go find that post someone made about chilchuck being the token allistic it was so fucking funny#i have like 3 more dunmeshi autism metas in my mental queue apparently. please make me shut up
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I think about this image often
"The gang hates me and only lets me stick around cause of Darry and soda!"
BOY YOU'RE THE GANGS LITTLE BROTHER DONT PLAY WITH ME

#the outsiders#the outsiders movie#the outsiders novel#ponyboy curtis#two bit matthews#two bit mathews#two-bit Matthews#you don't understand#oh my god#no cause two-bit realized there was something going on with pony#asides from his friend dying but fuck ykwim#and he realized pony wasn't feeling good and checked on him#NO AND HE WAS WORRIED TOO#you okay pony?#you feel kinda hot#ITS SO FUCKING SWEET#NOT EVEN TALKING ABIUT HOW HE SPENT TH EDAY WITH PONY TI MAKE SURE HE DIDNT SPIRAL#Somethign something that one post about how pony would've khs if the gang wasn't there#just all the little things two does for the gang :(((#he's such a brother#getting Johnny a coke#or dally a gift from the shop#going to get and buy the book for them :(((#giving pony some change for the bus#BEING WILLING TO DRIVE TO TEXAS FOR THEM OH MY GOD ILL NEVER EVER SHUT UP ABOUT THAT#TWOBIT YOH ARE THE PERFECT MAN#AUGHHHHHHH I NEVER STOP THINMIMG ABOUT IT
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You think Neil ever admits that the cheerleaders from Millport didn't like him and when Aaron finds this out it gets a genuine laugh out of him.
Neil refuses to see Aaron for the next week (other than practice of course) because whenever Aaron looks at him he scoffs at Neil & it drives him insane.
#shut up capt#'only josten would have beef with a cheerleading squad. you werent afriad of riko moriyama but you were scared of them??'#'andrew you have to dump him your boyfriend makes no sense.'#aside from that what the fuck did neil do that he had to avoid an entire cheerleading squad#how did he manage that#neil josten#aaron minyard#aftg
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Right and his work menaces (Brent and Karen).
I don't remember last I mentioned it but apart from crude nicknames to people (except Chris), he also just puts them in his phone really weird (except Chris, who is literally in his phone as Chris). And I bring this up because in Right's phone, Karen is saved as "Lawful Obligation".
#my characters#oops i fell in love#can you guys tell im stressed and hyperfixating on my own fucked up ocs cause i am#also brents nickname at work and in rights phone is fuckwad#and hes like yeah if im called anything else at this point by right its weird and uncomfortable#and when it is finally approached as if paul is only in rights phone as shitty-ex (answer) now that hes an excoworker#what was he in rights phone BEFORE the transfer#and right is like annoying dickwad ... karen is like oh i see thats why you call him a dick still#thats like a nickname from his phone name#and brent has to ask why fuckwad and dickwad and right looks at him and takes a deep breathe before saying#because i like the word wad and it is very comforting bc like a wad of paper ? you can throw it away#and so if i realize i gotta get rid of attachment i wad it up#also dont tell paul that dickwad was a form of attachment or he will never shut the fuck up about it#karen and brent both swear to never mention it to paul#paul is honestly such a weird anomaly in the plot bc he doesnt directly work at the same police station#but he is CONSTANTLY a topic of gossip or annoyance or updates#hes literally karens best friend! aside from chris he was one of the few right worked with who HAD touch privileges before right banned it#hes also just genuinely well liked but no one can actually tell him or he will become insufferable#which is a crime that rick is guilty of once when he meets paul and karen introduces him#and rick is just OH i know that name! youre her best friend#and she looks so betrayed and paul looks so delighted and stunned and radiant over this fact#and rick makes up for it before the night is over which is why karen forgives him - he made paul back in his place#anyway yeah right has lots of fears and hes my bundle of anxiety and i love him and his atrocious nicknames#i think i would die if i gave someone a rude nickname even affectionately irl#also also final note on this ig#since right is a detective and not always at the station its worth pointing out brent and karen just work taking calls and#doing misc other work at their desks which are nearby so they 100% bond and its wonderful#ok i lied final note on them is#for a very long time karen has to check with right to make sure she isnt annoying brent because he doesnt emote well#and shes scared she wont know if shes annoying him please help youre like the only one who reads his moods accurately
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Hey so hot take: Eurylochus gets too much shit for opening the bag of the winds. He has a whole ass song RIGHT BEFORE Keep Your Friends Close where he expresses his doubts and immediately gets shut down by Odysseus. “Oh, well, he trusted these little wind monsters over his captain.” Wrong. He felt the need to look for himself because he didn’t trust the “Open Arms” approach and DEFINITELY doesn’t trust a gift from a god. He’s not evil. He’s human.
#epic the musical#eurylochus epic#eurylochus epic the musical#idk man if i told my friend ‘hey i’m starting to have doubts/lose faith in you’#and they came back and were like ‘this is a gift from a god. don’t worry about what’s inside (:’#after pulling me aside and essentially telling me to shut the fuck up#i’d open the fucking bag too#plus he had no idea that would lead to poseidon killing over 500 men#how the fuck do you anticipate that?
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in light of lie detector tests irl being mostly bullshit, especially so for people with anxiety, combined with fandom shoving all their mental disorders onto their faves cuz projection is fun, i propose a much more chaotic take on zuko joining the gaang wherein toph can NOT get a fuckin read on this guy and kind of wants him to just sit down and breathe for a second thanks, your heartrate is giving her a headache
#as with most of my ideas#time for jokes#the gaang ends up at a standstill cuz they really DO need a firebending teacher#but they cant fuckin tell if zuko is lying#at first they assume he's just like azula#but then toph's genuine concern for his heart health shuts that down#and so they begin opperation calm zuko the fuck down#which does not work at all#cuz the gaang suddenly switching from 'mm dont trust you' to 'hey lets do a spa day' is concerning to say the least#and then joke prompts aside#the angst potential if toph ever misinterprets anxiety as a lie#especially in the early days of zuko joining the gaang#things could go wrong pretty fast#is hyper anxious zuko pretty ooc? yeah#do i care? no#two versions of any character in my head#one is classic best efoort interpretation of canon#other is a free for all of headcanons and projection#both are valid and both are constantly pinging around in my head#you dont get to choose how i play with my dolls asgjfhdh#atla#zuko#toph#book three#insp
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ok rewatched the ending bits, i really dont think sevika joining the council was even meant to be a fix-all for piltover and zauns issues i think it was intended to show just a step in the right direction
#you REALLY cant fix something that fucked up in a season but you can at least show hope for the future#thats what a lot of the stuff surrounding zaun is about when you boil it down#hope for a better future and steps in the right direction#the other councilors clearly didnt look that pleased with her being there and neither did SHE#so i dont think they ever intended to neatly tie up the conflict it wouldnt have felt right if they did no matter how it was handled#so yk. kinda glad it wasnt just SOLVED but that it was show there was SOMETHING being done to fix things eventually#shut up virgil#arcane spoilers#...yeah im not sleeping tonight LMAO im too hopped up on the dopamine from this show#again. writing issues aside. god fucking damn what a show
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sooooo... *twirls her hair* how many asks should i send until kuwagami art. jk as well. the real question will be: does it happen often that someone else’s art inspires you? in fandom spaces specifically
well you see it’s like a loyalty card program, every 10 asks or so you get a complimentary kuwagami
just kidding you can just breathe in my direction and I’ll be tempted to draw them. kuwagami blast! (you've caught me on a... just okay art day lol)
(people still like kabedons, right?)
anyway for my actual answer: in terms of direct inspiration, it doesn't really happen much? the last two times i did art directly based on someone else's work is probably this one from this fic, and also that time i drew art of someone else's judgment au. oh! and there's that moriohpsycho art based on this comic! (filthyguts' work is so very. hgngngghh. very good.) nothing else really comes to mind, and when i think of the other things i've been into recently there hasn't been as much opportunity for that to happen...
flex and herds = strong fixation but lmao. almost nobody else made stuff about them. nobody is surprised umineko = surprisingly i don't read much umineko fanfiction? and in terms of illustration, i certainly picked up imagery and indirect inspiration but nothing concrete enough for me to give an example... now that i think about it, i did once draw andromalius from redaction/sunny, but that was years ago, and also mostly because i was acquainted with the writer. ...i don't have that artwork on hand right now death note = didn't really get involved with the fandom + i enjoyed my own ideas well enough! ...i can't recall if i drew long-hair-L art before or after seeing other artists do it. and as for everything else the same kind of reasoning applies. didn't really get involved with the fandom or wasn't really compelled to make art in response to stuff i saw, or i just don't remember anymore.
buuuuuuut if we're opening this up to just... pulling ideas from other people? then yeah, all the time, though that kind of goes without saying when you have a creative hobby. ...it's probably going to be hard to come up with examples of this since it's more ambiguous.
there's uhhhhhh... kuwana listens to nickelback which was a @/four-white-trees invention, wasn't it? (EDIT: and @/overdevelopedglasses!) (not tagging in this post so he doesn't feel obligated to read my big ass ask responses 💀) as of writing this, it's not posted but i did end up making kuwagami art based on a nickelback song so. yknow. there's that LMAO
for sawashiro and arakawa, i do sometimes go reference @/todayisafridaynight 's art to help me with my own. ("how did he draw this part of the suit? oh, like that huh? hmm" <- this kind of thing)
and um. i'm not trying to pander to you (at least not this time), but genuinely it's one of the few examples that come to mind at this moment. but when i was writing my first kuwagami fic, i could feel the influence of the ever-changing on my brain... was turning over some of your ideas there...
you remember this? (you even pointed it out in your comment on my fic, and i should've said something then, but whatever i'm saying it now)
that was absolutely because of this
(obligatory poke at anybody else reading this post that you can read passthroughtime's fic here.)
so, um. yeah. not really sure what else to add to that. pretty self evident i think. (i'm always talking about the ever-changing but i don't think i can overstate the impression it left on me at the time)
anyhow there aren't really any other examples off the top of my head! these are all recent examples so they're not so difficult to recall, but there are probably others i've forgotten...
#jitxt#started writing this unsure if i could give many examples and i ended up with more than i expected. nice!#sunny is a very good piece of umineko writing and i should reread it with the author's notes toggled on. and also read redaction#“shouldn't you have read redaction first” n-no. shut up! (besides i think renall said it was fine)#nobody remind me of that 20k note post that's just an uncredited screenshot of sunny. it'll piss me off#as cosmic balance i ought to shill sunny as much as possible#anyway uhhhhhh. the everchanging.#i am awful about receiving compliments (i never know how to respond aside from a rehearsed “thank you”) but i sure am great at giving them!#apologies if i'm laying it on too thick but#1. i am being truthful and#2. i figure it's reparations for all the time i spent as a lurker on the kuwagami ao3 tag#the explosion in my brain when i realised that “the nice person who leaves lots of tags on my kuwagami art”#and “the person who wrote that REALLY FUCKING GOOD FIC” were one and the same. crazy. and now we are mutuals ❤#it is a little funny thinking of when i'd read your and four-white-trees' work before meeting you#real life foreshadowing for me meeting you both....#i still have these discord messages of me telling a friend about both your works#basically: (reading an update to the everchanging) wow that was depressing (reading a joke in four-white-trees' fic) nevermind i'm good now#i ought to reread the everchanging and take detailed notes on all the parts i like#just so you know your impact on my brain lol#kuwana calling yagami a pretty boy and meaning it sincerely oh my GOD. rewired my brain
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Hey does anyone still think about the thematic differences between Supernatural and the Wayward Sisters and how self-isolating male hunters are compared to community-building female hunters and how this was shown from the Harvelles to even arguably Missouri Mosely and even Samuel Campbell who is his daughter's father almost more than a man himself (especially in Season 6) is not immune to this?
And how the Wayward Sisters could have been built not on sacrificing yourself to this singular all-consuming relationship with your brother and sacrificing yourself for the world second or in name only, but instead on what it takes to cut yourself into useful and digestible pieces for the sake of keeping your place in that community because you're almost certain that it's This Community or Solitude Forever (Alex you can never escape the life no matter how much you don't want it you've gotta pitch in do you want your family to die on this hunt Claire you know you'll never find anyone to love you unless you make yourself softer and then are they really loving you are you even worthy of love anymore Jody your husband and son would still be alive if you listened and learned you can't lose another child in every sense you can't quite let your children be defenseless children either and you know so well how sick this fear makes you and how you're dealing with it the wrong way your son got to be a child but your daughters can't be that vulnerable Even Donna you have Your Role to play here you're not good enough as a hunter but you're funny and happy and you don't take up that much space so that's exactly how much space you're given to exist in).
And yes, a lot of these things are echoes of Kripke Supernatural but instead of too-intimate and dark and quiet confessions that the Winchesters share and know that no one else could ever have the context to fully understand it's Community it's All Our Problems the humiliation and shame is all-encompassing because there is no privacy Everyone Sees You Everyone Knows You Everyone Wants To Fix Help You.
#Not to disappoint anyone but This Is Still About Lucifer#QuietWings' Amnesiac!Lucifer turning up at the Wayward Sisters' house has been growing like mold inside my skull#I could rewrite several episodes and two full seasons at this point#But apart from how Gender Lucifer is and how there is a lot of female-coding in S5 the Community is a little more apt than Brother focus#Because yes Lucifer losing Michael and Gabriel and Raphael and God is tragic but Lucifer Went To Prison and lost Community and the World.#Lucifer has no place that wants him aside from Hell and the demons are a constant reminder of his fall they were the sin that triggered it#(There's no depth to his relationship to the demons - Lilith could've been different - but Lucifer asks for worship and wants Love)#But Lucifer would not be immune to the Community Needs. It only works because they think he's just a moody angel with the amnesia at first#But after the revelation he has to atone for his sins by Community Work it's only if he tries real hard that they can Forgive a little#But never Forget. (They've come to rely on an archangel and they've pissed off archangel-sized monsters. They're fucked if he's free)#But Where Else Would You Go Lucifer? You want to make this work because this is your spider's thread your Only Chance#Sam Winchester is the boy you waited for millions of years to be understood by and he can't look at you without wanting to throw up#Sam saw the ugliest parts of you and that's all he understands but fate tricked three unremarkable humans into seeing you as an angel#As a devoted servant as a guardian as a cherub ruled by love singing to yourself in the morning as you take care of your humans#They saw some ugliness of course you are prideful and you are Too Much your anger turns to hail when it's supposed to be silent or words#But you have a place. It's washing the dishes. It's braiding Claire's hair. It's peeling your vessel's skin off to show Alex the veins.#You're happy you're so happy it betrays a little bit of righteous rage bc you have a place and it's Good and you just have to be careful#(Why haven't you learned to shut up after Everything it cost you the first time? Why can't you understand love means bending a bit?)#You're happy but living in a vessel means folding yourself small and you can Never be comfortable. But where else can you go?
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Gotta be honest, making the TB bearer of Oronyx's Coreflame is lame as hell
#Likely won't happen bc we already know there is going to be 12 Chrysos Heirs (one for each Coreflame)#The 8 originally introduced and the 4 silhouettes from the 3.0 announcement (can't remember if it was an announcement or trailer)#And the new ones we saw in Tribbie's trailer#But also yeah like Dan Heng said at the end taking the Coreflame would be extremely binding the TB to Amphoreus#like that's literally the essence of one of their gods and you're just gonna take it and leave after the end of the Trailblaze mission?#Tbh the great thing about HSR's Trailblaze missions so far is that it shows you can perform incredible feats and help#without being front and center--really the importance of being the first follower#Taking the Coreflame and being front and center just feels...wrong#Also an aside note LOVE the parts where people are scheming against the Heirs and Krateros basically echoed all the stupid complaints#About Aglaea and Mydei was like 'shut the fuck up'
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#even though you fucked me over#I still wish you nothing but the best#I have a feeling you’ve moved on and have you’re own place now#and maybe even have a partner that you’re devoted to#if that’s true I’ll be happy for you#I hope my time will come#but putting myself and my jealousy aside#everyone deserves happiness and love#no matter how much they’ve fucked up in the past#I just thought I closed that chapter awhile ago#but for some reason the bitch in charge of my dreams#keeps throwing them in there#same with a bunch of other people from my past?#I’m like ok thanks I’d rather not think about those people but guess here we are 👌#shut up rosie
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desperate want to go up to that one progressive NSFW artist guy who nigh-on exclusively draws lesbians, in an extremely "this is porn directed AT (relatively milquetoast yada yada) sapphics" sorta way, and just. shake him. explain. not insinuating shit about his/your character it just makes my brain hurt explain yourself
#LIKE I ALREADY *KNOW* THE ANSWER#THE LEGENDARY 'HIMEJOSHI THAT ACTUALLY OPERATES LIKE A FUJO BUT IN REVERSE' IS OUT THERE (AND IRRITATING)#STRAIGHT GUYS WHO TAKE VOYEURISTIC PLEASURE IN THE INTERLOCKING FEM YET DON'T DO SO STRAIGHT UP SADISTICALLY. EXIST.#AT LEAST ONE OF 'EM HAD TO GO INTO THE ARTS SKLDGKHGDSKLSDG#BUT GAHHHHHHHHHH WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP AND BE A WORSE OR BETTER PERSON#if you know the guy i'm talking about you get a fucking. prize.#the prize is nothing sorry#also its w___________ K_________ and i don't hate him or anything#me accidentally directing internet rage his way would be fucking comedic given how god damn huge a chip on my shoulder i have for people#who've done way fucking worse in the same field. as in 'actually done bad things at all aside from be a guy' LMAO#its just. he's just the right blend of 'perfectly inoffensive but why are you here' (from what i've seen) to actually be funny and not. lik#'making blood sacrifices as i speak to try to hex you' levels of garbage#...also i didn't count the spaces up there his last name is NOT that long
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craziest thing u will ever learn is that u can make stuff even if its shit
#make bad art#truthfully#i used to throw out sketchbooks constantly if was so bad aside from the blatant waste its like#leave room for improvement and allow mistakes#i stopped drawing for a very long time at one point because i just felt like ohhh whats the point if its gonna be bad#shut the fuck up#the more you do the better you get#etc. etc.
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thinking about the pipeline from "[grabs face] don't EVER do that again you fucking idiot" to a healthy mix of "[holds face] has anyone told you how radiant you are when you smile" and "[holds face] focus on me (grounding)" is so healing. local jaded doctor loves his partner is not news to me and yet every day i'm just like "NITHRAL LOVES HIIIIIIM :SOBS:" like. y'all don't understand how much this man and ship mean to me.
(honestly i wonder if this is how yaevinn feels but from a first-person perspective. i think that's what the wobbly smile means. it's "on every level except physical i am giggling and kicking my feet".)
#; the citrus speaks#; lemon thesis moment#kind of a little#; healing hands#i never shut the fuck up about them i'm sorry#i think about them a lot#like maybe too much but by following my tumblr dot com you've agreed to be subjected to it#so actually maybe i'm not sorry#in fact i don't think i am#i love them and that's that! and i will talk about it until my lungs and fingers give out!!#ANYWAY that aside i uhhh love them a lot#and i feel like every day i somehow find a new facet of their relationship that makes me go AAAAAAA#and today it's “nithral loves yaevinn and there are about a bajillion reasons why that makes me emotional”#thank you molly for giving such an absolute gift of a character i love him and i love the love he and yaevinn share#i just. holds him so gentle#precious friend character#eeee#anyway#; lemon's inane ramblings#editing to add: honestly it is a pipeline but i feel like yaevinn isn't exempt from “[holds face] what the fuck was that. don't do that.”#which honestly even more healing#he cares so much and i want him to know that it's okay!!!! grrrrrr#feelings
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Which one is the one with the Legg tattoos I wanna chew on him
THAT'S ANDY 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 HE'S MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE WHO I LOVE SOSOSOSOSSOO VERY MUCHY MUCH 💝💕💘💖💓💗💕💝💞💖💓💖💓💕💗💝💖💘💖
from left to right: joe trohman (lead guitar), andy hurley (drums), patrick stump (vocals/rhythm guitar) and pete wentz (bass/lyrics)!! fall out boy band of all time full of sweet little lads hallelujah amen
#shut up kell#ask#shanie-the-komania-toyaddict#i figured i'd tell you all of their names here so that next time i'm talking your ear off abt them i can say names and you'll have visual#patrick is my favourite member bc i relate to him the most but ANDY IS SUUUUUCH A CLOSE SECOND FOR ME#if i'm thinking abt pre hiatus he IS my favourite tbh. andy's so good he's sososoosososo lovely#absolutely jacked. completely covered in tattoos excluding his face and. Well.#vegan. straightedge. engaged to a drop dead gorgeous goth woman. father to three teeny tiny dogs.#drums like a fucking machine. lives in pussytown usa solely due to his vibes#his voice is soft and sweet it's like butterflies exit his mouth despite his intimidating appearance. he's so charming#in five billion bands aside from fob but fob is His Band and he Loves His Fucking Boys#and he's a fucking loser ass nerd. what more could you ever want#andy hurley call me back andy hurley i want to give you sweet little kisskiss please baby
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i still can't get over my roommate implying i was autistic and my friend pulling out her phone to show me the "i'm like if a beautiful woman was an autistic little boy" meme that she'd been saving for the occasion someone acknowledged it
#HELLO#guys i try so hard to be normal how the fuck are people noticing#ALSO WHY ARE THEY ACKNOWLEDGING IT#my other friend who is actually diagnosed with autism is also such a little bitch about this#if i flinch at noises or say something a lil too blunt he pulls me aside and goes 'are u having a tism moment' cause he's terminally online#just the audacity of people to point out that ur being weird when ur being weird. HELLO RUDE#my roommate and i had a long convo about this because she's Implied this multiple times#and the first time she said it in front of people. after we went home i was like 'do u really think im autistic'#and she went 'well you know i think it's a spectrum and you're def on it but also i know lots of autistic people who have happy lives!'#and girl what the FUCK. why are u so comfortable talking to me like that#i just got very very agitated because someone's phone was ringing for a whole fucking min and they were just ignoring it. what's WRONG WITH#HER. and im allowed to have sensory issues without it being autism ok shut the fuck up#anyways. i truly don't know how im supposed to react if someone says something like this. because a. im not diagnosed#b. people are far too comfortable armchair diagnosing me. like im not Trying to be different from what's socially acceptable leave me alone#c. but i also don't want to make a big deal about it because they're just jokign around but also the joke is that im constantly weird#can someone tell me how im supposed to react to this#honestly im kinda scared to post this on the autism website.#please don't be too mean to me
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