#AND!! its red panda scar! which i have been meaning to try and take a crack at for months ^-^

[artsy-book]

SCARIDARTY DANCING FOR @sincerely-nines ^-^

[lifeofclonewars]

Zoolffe, Stinker, Zoost, Gonet, and Glo Koon

Did someone say modern AU!Wolfpack? No? Here you go anyway. This is long than I originally anticipated. Part 4 of Pun Wars but, as always, can be read alone. AO3 link in the post below on my blog if you’d prefer to read it that way.

Summary: 

Grr has renamed Curveball to Stinker

Stinker Hey!

Booster Seat You should’ve seen that coming, vod’ika

Stinker Maybe, but that doesn’t make me like it any more

-

In which Wolffe helps his buir watch over his brothers (including Boost) at the zoo, Sinker acts like the little brother he is, Comet gets lost, and Plo gets decked in glow sticks.

—–

Wolffe wanted to help his buir out, he really did. But his vod’ikase seemed to have doubled in mischief-making since he left for college ten months ago. Now, home for the summer after his freshman year, he could point out all the things that had changed in the months he’d been away. 

Like Boost’s haircut. Were all fifteen-year-olds that moody and prone to shaving most of their hair and dying it red? Wolffe had always been grouchy— since he was a baby and likely would be till he died— so he couldn’t use himself as a base of reference. But seriously, what had Boost been thinking? It wasn’t even ginger or anything close to that. Nope, he had to go full-blown maroon.

Not that Sinker had been any better. The thirteen-year-old’s hair was silver. Upon seeing it, Wolffe had not been able to tell if it had been the result of a prank, dare, or just sheer free will. He had told Sinker it made him look like a tiny, old man. The brat had kicked his shin and told him it looked cool in retaliation. A few weeks later and he still didn’t know, and he didn’t plan on finding out. 

Comet, thankfully, hadn’t changed his hair. But he was ten, so it was bound to happen in a few years. Rather, the little rascal had taken to playing more pranks, mouthing off often, tackling Sinker and Boost (and once, an off-guard Wolffe, not that he’d admit it out loud), and then acting like a total sweetheart in front of their dad. He wasn’t quite at the teenage-brat stage Sinker had begun and Boost was well into but it was on the horizon. 

“Yes! We’re finally here!” Boost exclaimed, pumping his fist in the air. The car made its way through the parking lot while their dad chuckled from the driver’s seat. 

Boost, Wolffe, and Comet sat in the back, allowing Sinker the passenger’s seat. A year ago, the teen might have boasted about it, but now it was automatic. Comet was still too young and, well…Wolffe and Boost hadn’t felt too good about sitting in the front since—  

Now wasn’t the time to think about that.  

The maroon-haired teen had been the most excited about the trip to the zoo. He had pleaded and pleaded and even made a presentation he proudly gave. Buir had entertained him and sat through it, then revealed the presentation hadn’t been necessary: he had already decided on a date for them to go. Now that the day had arrived, Boost was practically vibrating in his seat from anticipation. 

“Yes, it appears we are,” their dad responded. “Look at all this pandamonium.” He parked the car under a little sign with a cartoon panda displayed. Groans rang through the vehicle. The puns had begun. 

“Well, at least we’ll remember where we parked,” Sinker muttered under his breath. Wolffe rolled his eyes at his little brother. Thankfully, since he sat behind said brother, Sinker couldn’t see or react to it. 

The five Koons clambered out of the car and headed for the entrance. Buir led the way and Wolffe brought up the rear, making sure his brothers didn’t stray too far from each other. Soon enough, tickets were bought and shown and bags were checked and the family was in the zoo. 

At the first bench, they set down their two backpacks. “Alright,” buir stated, pulling out two things of sunscreen. “Let’s get this over with.” He handed one to Wolffe and they set to work, applying it to themselves and to the little rascals. After that, baseball caps were placed on heads, and sunglasses passed out. Wolffe took the backpack buir didn’t grab, and then they set off to see the Big Cats at Boost’s request.  

“Tigers, lions, and bears, oh my!” Comet said as they approached. Since he was ten, he was starting to get the hang of some of the references his aliit made that weren’t strictly cartoons. He’d been eagerly adding his own to the mix. Sinker smiled at him and gently punched his shoulder.

“Oh my, for sure, though the bears aren’t over here. Just wait ‘til the dad jokes for this start.”

Not a minute later, buir, being dragged along by Boost, who had a firm grasp on his hand, turned to his other sons and said, “Why are tigers terrible storytellers?”

Sinker sighed and indulged him. “Why?”

“Because they only have one tail!”

Boost snickered, coming to a stop in front of the tigers. Without looking at the plaque with information, he began to spit out facts about the striped cats. 

Buir listened, giving Boost his full attention. While Wolffe appreciated the care his dad was showing, that left him to make sure Comet didn’t try to climb up anything either. That was another habit he’d picked up. Most kids are little monkeys when they’re younger because they found it fun and were curious; Comet just liked to make things difficult for his ori’vod.

Instead of climbing on the railing, Comet had apparently made up his mind to try to dig his feet into Wolffe’s back and try to climb up him instead. Wolffe grunted when he landed a solid jab in his side but otherwise didn’t react. 

The little monkey somehow succeeded and clung to his older brother piggyback style. How he did it around the backpack was beyond Wolffe. Comet thumped his forehead against the back of Wolffe’s head. 

“Hey, hey Wolffe,” he said. “I wanna go see the penguins.”

Sinker perked up at that. “I wanna see the penguins, too!” It was the most excited he had looked yet.

Boost, having finished his ramblings, overheard his brothers. He frowned. “But I’m not done here!" 

"I can take Comet and Sinker by myself,” Wolffe found himself offering. Hmm.

Now buir was frowning at him. “Are you sure you want to, Wolffe?”

“I can handle it,” he reaffirmed. 

“Alright. Keep your phone on and stay together! Be safe, have fun." 

"Yep, we got it, buir. Bye!” Sinker was now the one to grab Wolffe’s hand and drag him along. “C'mon, you big lump nugget." 

"I’ll send you all the jokes!” Boost called out as they left. 

Sinker grunted as he pulled Wolffe along. “I come up to your shoulder now, this shouldn’t be this hard!" 

"Comet’s still on my back,” he reminded. Comet waved from where he was. It’s not like Wolffe was being particularly cooperative with the pulling, either. Sinker didn’t seem to register that, though. 

“Oh.” He dropped his grip on Wolffe’s hand, giving up. He pulled a map out of who-knows-where, double-checking they were headed in the right direction.

“Stay in sight,” Wolffe reminded. Sinker nodded and moved to Wolffe’s right but didn’t take his hand. “Sinker.” Wolffe turned his head to look at him.

Sinker turned, eyebrows scrunched together. “What?” A beat. “Oh, right! The eye…” He switched to Wolffe’s left easily. 

“That’s better.”

They continued on their way, occasional comments coming from Comet. Things like, “Wow, I feel so tall. Maybe I’ll be taller than you one day, Wolffe!” and “This is farther than the map looked.“ Once, even, "That cloud looks like Boost when he’s mad,” which got a few chuckles. 

Wolffe’s phone buzzed twice when they were almost to the exhibit. 

Chat: The Wolfpack

Booster Seat

Why don’t leopards play hide and seek? They’re always spotted!

Curveball

Wayii!

Wolffe shook his head at the messages and put his phone back in his pocket. The small group rounded the corner, and they came across a small building, appropriately decorated with various kinds of penguins. A mixture of photographs and drawings spanned the sign reading “Lina Soh Penguin Cove” and accompanying wall.

Comet jumped off his back and would’ve made a run for the exhibit, had Wolffe not managed to snag the collar of his t-shirt and hold him back. Together, they calmly made their way in, thank you very much. 

Once inside, both Sinker and Comet took off their sunglasses. Sinker placed his on the bill of his cap, while Comet took them completely off and hung them on his shirt. 

“Aren’t you going to take yours off?” Comet asked.

“Nope.” Enough rude people had openly stared at him already today because of the scar. He didn’t need the added attention a visible prosthetic eye brought. 

“Oh, okay.” Wolffe patted his vod'ika on the back, then shifted his hand to Comet’s shoulder to make sure he didn’t run over the people in front of them. He struggled against the grip for a moment but stopped when Wolffe’s grip tightened a smidge. 

Comet stopped in front of every single exhibit for at least a few minutes. He rooted himself to the spot when they reached the one that had a few rockhopper penguins— according to the sign on the glass— waddling around. His eyes brightened, jaw dropping slightly as he tugged on Wolffe’s shirt to grab his attention. 

“Those guys are like Lovelace in Happy Feet!” 

Sinker chuckled next to him. “Yep. I gotta say, that was not what I expected you to say.”

The youngest scrunched his nose, eyes narrowing at his silver-haired brother. “What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“It means you’re unpredictable,” Wolffe deadpanned.

Sinker made a face at Wolffe and answered Comet himself. “No, it means that movie is older than you so I didn’t expect you to make a reference to it.”

“You didn’t say anything when I referenced The Wizard of Oz earlier!”

“That’s a classic! Everyone knows it! But a movie from over te—” 

“One of them is walking this way,” Wolffe interrupted. If the duo kept that up, he was bound to have a headache by the end of the day. Nevermind the fact he’d volunteered himself for this. 

Comet and Sinker snapped their heads to the exhibit where, as per Wolffe’s word, a rockhopper penguin was waddling closer and closer to the glass. They gasped in unison and Wolffe couldn’t help but shake his head fondly at his vod’ikase. It was like they’d never seen one before despite what they had just been arguing about.

There was a small rock formation that served as a perch for the penguins to get close to the visitors. The glass was tall enough people couldn’t just reach in and steal a penguin or for a penguin to somehow hop their way out of the exhibit without a zookeeper there. The one Wolffe had pointed out had swum the small pool of water between the rocks to waddle along the perch. Comet waved to the flightless bird when it looked his way and it tilted its head. 

Comet gasped. “Did you see that? He saw me!”

Sinker peered at the sign on the glass. “This says his name is Vandor.”

“Hi, Vandor!” Comet said. His smile stretched wider, bright enough it nearly melted the ice in the room. Sinker took out his phone, taking pictures of Vandor and Comet interacting.

It took them another forty-five minutes to make their way through the rest of Penguin Cove. After his interaction with Vandor, Comet demanded they stop in front of each exhibit and read the signs to learn each and every individual penguin’s name. From there, he would find where each of them was, call out their name, and try to get them to react to him. He was remarkably successful with a good percentage of them. All the while, Sinker took pictures and videos, undoubtedly sending some to buir and Boost. 

Right before the exit, Wolffe stopped his brothers and made them put their sunglasses on again. Using the lull, Sinker announced, “Buir sent me a dad joke in response to the pictures.” Wolffe gestured for him to continue. “Why don’t penguins fly? They aren’t tall enough to be pilots.” 

Comet burst into giggles. “Hey, that’s a pretty good one.”

“For buir’s standards, yeah, it is,” Sinker agreed. 

Wolffe held back an eye roll. “Where do you gremlins want to go next?” he asked instead.

His question prompted Sinker to pull out the map again. “Hmm. Well, I want to go to the primate house but that’s a long ways away. We should go somewhere closer first, right?”

“That would be preferable, yes.”

Comet tugged Sinker’s arm lower so he could see the map as well. “The polar bears are close.”

“I’m okay with that.”

“Great, that’s where we’re headed, then.” Wolffe took the map this time and placed it in the backpack. His phone buzzed again as he slung the bag across his shoulders. 

Booster Seat

What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries? An investigator!

“I guess we know where those two are now,” Sinker commented.

The group spent a decent amount of time at the polar bears, though not as long as the penguins. From there, they saw the bears, which were just across the way from the polar bears. Sinker and Comet made a wide array of comments. From “They look meaner than any teddy bear I’ve ever seen” to “That one looks like Warthog” (which got some strange looks since Warthog was their bulldog), to even “Why are so many of them sleeping?”

After that, Comet got restless. He began to fidget more and Wolffe’s worries he’d start to climb up something he shouldn’t increased. While reapplying sunscreen, the truth finally came out: he wanted to switch groups. Wolffe had to pull up the family group chat to ask.

Chat: The Koon Cocoon

Howl are you?

Comet wants to join your group. Where are you?

Buir

We’re by the hyenas

Howl are you?

He says nevermind then

Ghosty Boi

Lol

Buir

Would you like to meet up for lunch?

Howl are you?

I think my bag has all the packed lunches, so that’d work best

Buir

Great. How about the playground by the children’s zoo? Around 12:30

Hook, Line, and— 

Works for me

Howl are you?

Sounds good

They had another half an hour to kill before they had to set out towards the meeting area. Sinker insisted they went to the wolf exhibit, “‘cause you gotta see your namesake, Wolffe!” and because it was conveniently on the way to the playground. With a sigh, Wolffe relented and they made their way to it.

Once there, they noticed none of the wolves were outside; rather, they had all gone to the indoor section of their exhibits. The “Lothal Wolf Lodge,” as it was so aptly named, had a striking resemblance to the outside of the Great Wolf Lodge water parks. 

“I think they should rename it the Wolffe Koon Lodge,” Sinker said as they entered.

“We don’t have the money for a donation big enough for that,” Wolffe responded.

Sinker huffed. “Well, maybe I’ll become a millionaire so I can and I’ll tell them to name it after you when I’m older. It’s a pun! It has to be done!”

“I thought you didn’t like puns,” Comet said. “You always groan when buir says them.”

“That’s because they’re dad jokes,” Sinker replied. “Puns on their own are okay. When said by dads is when they decline.”

“You make puns sometimes,” Comet pointed out. “Which might make them dad jokes in the future.”

Sinker cringed. “Let’s not think that far into the future.” He turned to the first exhibit and ignored his brothers. Wolffe chuckled lightly and followed his younger brothers through the lodge. 

After Comet and Sinker debating which wolf looked most like Wolffe and which one acted most like him, they agreed they were hungry enough to head the rest of the way to the meetup. Which was fortunate; had they taken any longer, Wolffe would’ve had to herd them outside himself. 

Comet climbed up onto Wolffe’s back once again, but not before Sinker was handed the backpack. It must’ve been more comfortable for him but it meant Wolffe got more pokes to his head and shoulders as Comet distracted himself as they walked. There was no reason for the poking— he was just acting on his little brother instincts, it seemed. 

The playground they met at had equipment that was styled after different African animals. Slides, swings, monkey bars, and plenty of picnic benches and grass. Given the time, the area was crawling with families of all sizes and ages. Shrieks, laughs, and the gentle murmur of talking floated through the air as they approached. 

Looking around, no open picnic benches were available. Something waving out of the corner of his eye caught Wolffe’s attention. He turned left towards it. There was Boost, waving both arms as obnoxiously as possible at a table he and buir had managed to secure. Sinker took off, as fast as a hunting lion, excited at the prospect of food. He tore the bag off his shoulders and opened it, digging around for his lunch box with only a breathy “Hi” to greet their dad.

Wolffe walked over and set Comet on the ground by the time Sinker and Boost had found their lunches and started eating. “Hi, buir,” he greeted.

Buir smiled. “Hello Wolffe, Comet. Glad you could make it safely.”

“Hi, buir!” Comet exclaimed. “I have so much to tell you about what we saw!” Delighted, buir beckoned Comet over and they sat together as the ad’ika began to talk his ears off. 

Soon enough, everyone had eaten their lunches and shared anecdotes of their day. Boost was ecstatic the day was turning out so well; it had been his idea, after all. 

Shoving his scraps into the closest trash can, Boost raced back over. “Okay, so I looked it up and the next dolphin show takes place in about twenty minutes. That gives us the perfect amount of time to walk over there and find good seats in time for it to begin. What do you guys think?”

“A dolphin show? That sounds pretty cool,” Sinker said. Comet nodded his agreement. 

“It’s settled then,” buir announced, clapping his hands together. “We’re all going to the show.”

The three youngest cheered. Once the table was cleaned up and back to how it was before they used it, the aliit set off. Once again, Boost and buir led the way with Wolffe in the back and the other two between them. Already, the afternoon was set up to be intriguing, to say the least. 

—

The dolphin show had actually been rather fun. Boost had wanted to sit in the splash zone and had to be reminded they didn’t have any extra clothes with them. Apparently, the prospect of walking around in wet clothes wasn’t appealing, as he then advocated for two rows above the splash zone. They did sit exactly two rows above it, close enough for some droplets to hit them but no need for ponchos or a change. Buir made one pun, letting the zookeepers make the rest (there were plenty): this show is fintastic!

After that, the Koons had gone into the section of the Chuchi Aquatics Center to see the dolphins underwater. Along with that, they were also able to see seals, orcas, and a cute little otter family that waved at Comet and Sinker. On the other hand, poor Boost couldn’t get them to wave to him.

“It’s because you stink since you never take showers. They can smell it through the glass,” Sinker teased. Of course, that led to buir and Wolffe temporarily separating the two before they could start arguing. 

While the aquatics had been fascinating, Wolffe’s vod’ikase were still a tad restless, energy levels high from their lunches. As a result, they walked back over to the playground they had eaten lunch at. Upon arriving there, Comet noticed the Organa Family Children’s Zoo and detoured them towards that instead.

Buir let the pups free once inside. The children’s zoo consisted of a building with multiple activities and an outdoor, fenced in-area with a petting zoo, a small aviary, and other outdoor games. Coloring sheets, a stuffed animal hospital, mini-classes, matching games, and more spanned the inside. Hopscotch, more lessons, and even a see-saw enhanced the outdoor experience. 

Boost ran for one of the lessons, Sinker for the aviary, and Comet for some sort of puzzle. 

Buir took interest in the signs on a bulletin board, announcing upcoming events. A multicolored, vivid poster caught his attention. He beckoned Wolffe over and tapped on the poster. “How does this seem?”

In tree-frog green read “Glow and Behold, a Fluorescent-Themed Event for all ages!” A quick scan through told it was happening tonight, after sundown, for guests who paid extra for passes. Zookeepers would be showing off the bioluminescent critters the zoo had, have glow-in-the-dark activities, and have a few presentations and shows along the same theme. 

He hummed. “I think Boost will like it. Comet will like the excuse to stay up later. Sinker might want to go just for the glow sticks.”

Buir chuckled. “Yes, that was what I was thinking. Would you like to go?”

Wolffe shrugged. “I’m fine with it either way. But if it’ll make them happy, I’m more willing to stay.”

“I guess that means we’re going to go, then. I’ll just need to purchase the tickets. Can you watch your brothers while I go do that?”

“Yeah, that won’t be too hard in here. What are we going to do about dinner?”

“I’m sure we can find a reasonable enough restaurant somewhere in this zoo.” Buir took a picture of the poster, probably as a reminder of exactly what he was buying tickets for when he got to wherever was selling them.

“Alright, be safe and quick.”

Buir grinned at him. “Always, Wolffe. Keep your brothers out of trouble.”

“That’s easier said than done.”

With a pat on the back, buir left. Wolffe found an empty seat and sat down. He took the chance to look through the notifications that had built up over the day. He’d only been looking at the chat ones so far. His brothers kept themselves occupied. Even if Boost and Sinker may have been on the upper end of the age range the children’s zoo was aimed at, they nevertheless found things to do and methods to have fun. At one point, Boost convinced the other two to join him in one of the lessons. They came back over to Wolffe afterward, spouting fun facts about pachyderms. 

Before he knew it, buir had returned, tickets safely tucked into his backpack. They spent a good hour more in the children’s zoo, leaving only once Boost got antsy to see the snakes and, as Comet put it, “other slippery, slimy creatures.” There, another dad joke was told: Why are snakes difficult to fool? You can’t pull their leg! Boost jumped at the opportunity to hold a boa constructor when a zookeeper offered. Sinker stayed a safe distance away and took pictures, laughing at some of the faces he caught on camera. 

Snakes, then the hoofed animals such as zebras, camels, donkeys, and antelopes. More pictures, more sunscreen, more bickering. A stop by the giraffes, okapis, cheetahs, and wildebeests. Comet was shocked to find out what warthogs really looked like, outside of their dog’s name and Pumbaa. They even caught a short program in the lemur house. 

Coming out of the program, everyone was getting snappy with each other. That could mean many things but, given the time of day, simply meant one: dinner time. Sinker pulled out the map and listed off the options at buir’s request. 

“I want to eat there,” Comet said, pointing to a restaurant on the map.

Boost scrunched his face up. “But that’s so far away. We should just eat here,” he pointed to a different spot. “It’s a lot closer, which means we’ll get to eat sooner.”

“Both those options suck.” Sinker yanked the map away from them. “I don’t know if you guys can read or not, but those places only have stuff we ate for dinner the past few days.”

“So?” Boost snapped. “That just means I actually liked what we ate for dinner. Just because you’re such a picky eater doesn’t mean we all have to suffer.”

“I’m not a picky eater!” 

Comet snatched the map out of Sinker’s hands as the bickering continued. Wolffe reached over and grabbed it himself. He handed it to buir. “Why don’t you pick? They’re never going to decide on anything and I don’t care where.”

Buir picked somewhere that satisfied Sinker’s food choices, still had options Boost and Comet would eat, and was different from the three restaurants that had been argued over. It was small compared to other eateries they had passed throughout the day but that, if anything, established a cozy, family-friendly atmosphere. The Savanna Shack— decorated with giraffes, gazelles, cheetahs, and more—  replicated a pit-stop on a safari. The waitstaff dressed up as tour guides and their waiter even had a stuffed African elephant resting across his shoulders. 

Bickering calmed as bellies were filled. The snappy bickering, at least. They were brothers: bickering happened twenty-four/seven whether they registered it or not. Everyone was content with the adventures of the day. 

After dinner, the crowds thinned, more and more guests leaving as the normal closing time loomed closer. Only those with tickets to the presentation stayed scattered around the exhibits. All things considered, it was a decent number of bodies; enough for clusters at every exhibit but not the overwhelming presence that it had been. 

At the Australian animals, buir somehow had a bucketload of jokes to tell. If Wolffe hadn’t known his dad had prepared them all the night before, he’d have thought he’d looked them up discreetly during dinner. 

“Can a wallaby jump higher than a building? Of course, buildings can’t jump!” directed towards Sinker, who groaned. “Are you enjoying the koala-ty time?” was said to Comet, who smiled and nodded. “What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!” to Boost, who shook his head. “Are your brothers platypushing your buttons?” to which Wolffe held back a “No, but the puns are.” Had it been Boost, he’d probably have said it, but since it was buir…best not to. 

Like all good things, the peace came to an end. “I want to go to the primate house,” Sinker announced. “I said so this morning but I still haven’t been able to.”

“I don’t want to go there,” Boost retorted. “I want to see the Arctic animals.”

“The three of us already went there,” Sinker said. “You missed out, boohoo.”

“I want to see the bison and buffalo,” Comet piped up because what is an argument without the youngest butting in with their opinion. 

Wolffe sighed. “Guess we’re splitting up again. Same groups?”

That appeased them. Buir nodded his confirmation; the groups split off. Wolffe, Comet, and Sinker were sent off with one more pun. “Did you hear about the awful jungle party? Somebody forgot to bring the chimps and dip.”

“Alright, adike, bison and buffalo are first.” Sinker opened his mouth to protest and Wolffe held up a hand and continued. “They’re on the way to the primates. I promise we’ll see them.”

Sinker’s lips twitched downwards for a second but he nodded once and let them continue on. 

Once at the exhibit, they learned that buffalo and bison are different, despite most people using the word interchangeably. Buffalo lived in Asia and Africa, bison in North America and Europe. Huh. Guess you learn new things every day, even on summer break during college.

“They don’t do much,” Comet said as he watched a bison chew grass in front of them.

“Most of the animals we’ve seen don’t do much when the zookeepers aren’t around,” Sinker pointed out.

“That’s not true. I got the penguins and the otters to wave at me.”

“You’re a special case. That doesn’t happen to most guests.”

“The otters waved at you and Wolffe, too.”

Sinker shared an exasperated look with Wolffe. There are some battles you just can’t win. 

Somehow, Comet found a way to waste a full hour at the buffalo and bison. He took his time reading each sign, asking clarification for every word he didn’t know, and even some he did know. He tried waving at the buffalo, seeing if they’d look up at him. When they didn’t, he tried the bison, who also didn’t. Slow, small steps were around the exhibit as he moved to look at the individual animals. Why he was doing so was beyond Wolffe. 

Soon enough, Sinker had had enough. “Why are you taking so long! Ugh, you little brat, let’s go already!” 

Comet looked half-ready to either punch, bite, or tackle his older brother. Wolffe repressed a sigh and tried to intervene. “Sorry, Comet. We have been here a while. It wouldn’t kill you to move on, would it?” The expression turned from one older brother to the other. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Wolffe’s phone started a consistent beat of buzzes. “Wait a second.” 

Pulling it out, he noticed an alarm was going off. It was his daily reminder to take his brothers on a walk, something he’d been doing to let buir relax after dinner, get some of his vod’ikase’s energy out, and as an extra way to hang out with them with what time he had. The alarm was easy to turn off, but as he went to put it away, a non-buzzing notification appeared. 

Comet began to sidestep his way away from Sinker and back to the bison behind him. Coincidentally, he brought himself closer to Wolffe in the process.

“Hold still another second,” Wolffe ordered. Comet stopped. “Buir’s typing.” Sinker pulled out his own phone as the notification rolled in.

Chat: The Koon Cocoon 

Buir

Calling all Koons

Howl are you?

Comet’s right next to me

Hook, Line, and— 

Yeah?

Ghosty Boi

Hi

Buir

Hello, Boost

Ghosty Boi

:)

Buir

Just a reminder to reapply sunscreen and that we’ll meet up again for the fluorescence demonstration

Howl are you?

Yessir

Hook, Line, and— 

Yep yep yep

Ghosty Boi

👍

Chat: The Wolfpack

Curveball

Boost, aren’t you standing right next to him?

Booster Seat

Hmm maybe

Curveball

I can’t believe you

“Do we have to?” Comet grumbled when Wolffe pulled the sunscreen from the backpack. “The sun’s gonna set in a few hours, anyway.”

“You said it yourself, it’s in a few hours,” Wolffe replied, squirting some onto his hand and grabbing Comet’s arm to rub it on. “And buir said so. You don’t want to disappoint him and end up with a sunburn, do you?”

“No,” the ten-year-old muttered, scuffing the ground with his shoe but otherwise submitting to his fate.

“I’ve put on so much of this I’m faintly sticky,” Sinker remarked, rubbing some into his own arms.

“You’re not rubbing it in enough, you should know that.” Wolffe finished with Comet and moved onto reapplying it on himself. “You still have some visible on your neck, by the way.” Sinker scowled and rubbed at his neck harshly for a second before continuing on elsewhere. 

Once done, the bottle took its spot in the backpack. “Primates?” Sinker asked, looking more optimistic than he had a second ago.

“Primates.” The teen set his feet. “No running.” Sinker rolled his eyes and settled for a brisk walk instead. 

They made it to the “Sheev Palpatine Primate House” in record time. The structure loomed high, dark, and mysterious, casting a long shadow on everything around it. From the outside, there was no hint of the liveliness and cheer the rest of the zoo showcased. Had it not been for the sign, it could be mistaken for a large corporation’s administrative offices, or maybe even a sinister government building. Looking at it sucked the joy out of the atmosphere and forbode guests from entering.

Wolffe quirked an eyebrow at Sinker. “You still sure about this?”

He gulped, then nodded. “Yeah. The interior’s bound to be better than the deathtrap the outside looks like, right?”

Sinker took the lead into the building, Comet not far behind him. Through the doors and up some stairs— the architects must have planned carefully for this to work; bringing the rising reminder humans are primates, too— and they were in the exhibit proper. Inside, neither took off their sunglasses, nor their hats. Rather, they stared in awe at the sight before them. 

Thankfully, Sinker had guessed correctly. Greenery spanned the open exhibit from floor to ceiling; lush and healthy, food and cover. Sturdy trees stood tall and proud, vines hung lazily across them. It was a snapshot straight out of a jungle. Rocks, both fake and real, climbed the walls, providing seating and exercise for the primates. Lining the wall was a path, extended out as a bridge over the middle of the expanse and connected to another wall-hugging path on the other side before disappearing into a smaller room. Educational plaques made their appearances at even intervals along the railing protecting the walkers from falling. A small stream circled its way around the edges of the floor. Windows, nearly the length of the ceiling and far wall, lit the habitat with a soft glow kissing every branch, human, primate, and structure it touched. And that wasn’t even touching the activities and range of primates at home around the building. 

Who would want such a vibrant view so obscured and hidden from public eye?

Groups peppered the path. Some were smaller, a couple and their baby or a trio of friends. Others were larger, an extended family enjoying a vacation or a small summer camp group, energized and giggling.

If Wolffe snuck a picture of starry-eyed Sinker and Comet for possible blackmail or possibly because he wanted pictures of his brothers whether he’d admit it or not, nobody caught him and nobody needed to know. 

Phones took pictures up and down the path, Sinker’s included. They moved along at a slower pace than other groups; many passed them before they reached a quarter of the way through. A grin rested on Sinker’s face the whole time, delighted he got what he came for. 

Chimpanzees, apes, and gorillas interacted by the stream below. Food passed between a handful of them, like an interspecies picnic. Howler monkeys and baboons roamed the trees, rocks, and floor, passing each other nonchalantly. Primates of all shapes and sizes hung in trees with their young, cradling them gently, teasing each other, relaxing. A splash sounded as one small monkey pushed the one next to it into the stream; the interaction reminded Wolffe of Boost and Sinker at the pool. 

Comet and Sinker paused halfway across the bridge. Leaning over the railing, Comet seemed to be trying to look under the bridge, causing Wolffe to drag him back by the collar before he fell in. 

“I know there are nets, but let’s not test them out, okay?”

A sheepish smile made its way to the youngest’s face. “Sorry.” 

Another group made their way closer to them, also stopping for pictures on the bridge. Thankfully, there was still a decent amount of room left to move. Behind them, Sinker snickered. Wolffe turned, Sinker now to his left, Comet now at his back. He raised an eyebrow but Sinker merely smirked as both their phones buzzed. 

Curveball

Attached: primate-house-adventures.jpeg

The picture was of a pair of orangutans seated in a tree. To the side, not in focus but visible, stood Comet and Wolffe. The former, as happy and enthusiastic as at the penguins and leaning over the side; the latter, scowling out at something. Whether it was Comet or the monkeys wasn’t clear. One thing was clear, however: Sinker had taken it moments before Wolffe had pulled the rascal back.

Booster Seat

Lol, you good there Wolffe?

Grr

I’d rather not have siblings in nets, thanks

Booster Seat

Was he trying? Sounds about right

Curveball

Sure looked like it

Grr

I’d say I don’t think so 

But he’s been doing stuff like that more often recently

Booster Seat

Lol yeah, he’s definitely got Fett blood in him

Sinker had enough of the bridge, evidently, as he started to walk off and to the other side, half paying attention to where he was going, half glancing at his screen. Wolffe began to follow after, certain that Comet was right behind them. 

Booster Seat

Still:

Wolffe for #1 Brooding Face

Grr

Wow, thanks

Booster Seat

You’re v welcome

Curveball

Daily reminder that Wolffe is a grump yvw

Grr

I’d say you’re wrong, but…

Booster Seat

But…

Grr

Ever since I got home…

Booster Seat

Oh?

Grr

You’ve been the main reason

Curveball

WOW

Booster Seat

😂😂

Grr

Nope, that was directed at you, too, Booger

Curveball

BOOGER jfkdafj;ads

Sometime in the midst of the chaos of the chat, Wolffe idly noticed they had made their way out of the primate house. Sinker had paused here and there and looked up, Wolffe matching his pace. Outside the house, in the back and the opposite side of where they had entered, a small garden with a winding path presented itself. Looks had been deceiving in more ways than one with this building. Large boards along the path told more information about jungles and rainforests, including how an average citizen could help with conservation. 

Despite this, the chat continued to buzz, a total disregard for where the brothers walked. They wound their way through the garden and towards the nearest bench. 

Booster Seat

I, unfortunately, can’t think of a good comeback to that

Curveball

You can think of all those puns but you can’t think of a comeback

Booster Seat

Those were 100% Dad I thought that was clear

Grr

Can confirm. Watched him look them up last night

Curveball

Creepy

Grr

He was in the living room, di’kut

At a bench, they stilled. Comet hadn’t whined about not knowing what was going on, which was a bit odd, but not too concerning. Maybe he’d found himself some patience. Without looking up, Wolffe reached out his right hand to clasp Comet on the shoulder— 

And only hit air.

Kriff.

He spun, head swiveling, unable to find what he was looking for. Oh, oh no. This was not good. This was not good at all. 

His phone got turned off and shoved down his right pants pocket. “Sinker,” he said, somehow sounding calmer than he felt. “Where’s Comet?”

Sinker’s head snapped up. “I thought he was next to you. Is he not?”

“No.”

Sinker’s eyes widened. “Wait, so you mean—”

“Yeah,” he croaked out. “Comet’s gone.”

“Uh oh.”

“Sinker.” He gulped, Wolffe’s voice hardening. “I know it’s been a year, but do I need to remind you I don’t have a right eye? And that I need you to be my eye, which includes telling me if our brother has gone missing?!” Before he knew it, Wolffe was lecturing his younger brother. Out of nowhere, his thoughts crashed down violently as the desperation of the situation fully sunk in.

This was great. Just great. Splitting up was a bad idea after all. He should’ve known better. Buir always had good reasons to be concerned, why hadn’t he listened to him this time? He was really gunning for Worst Older Brother of the Year, wasn’t he? Why did he ever think he’d be able to handle this? 

He took off mid-sentence, Sinker to his left and keeping up, headed back the way they came. His head stayed consistently scanning back and forth, looking for a clue, a hat, a pair of sunglasses, a laugh, a whimper, anything that could lead them back to Comet. 

Why had he thought he’d been good to watch over two rambunctious brothers? He couldn’t even avoid a car crash after driving for a few years. It’d only been one since he lost his eye and Boost gained his scars. He had felt fine when he’d suggested it but this showed that he wasn’t as adjusted as he thought. He knew he only had half of his former vision, he lived with it every day. And yet, he still dismissed it when Comet moved into his blind spot, didn’t check in like he should have. Like he was supposed to. 

Nope. No. No. Now was not the time to delve into those…issues. Focus. 

Find. Comet.

He didn’t pop up along the way back to the exit of the primate house. Hopefully, that meant Comet parked it where he was. Speed up. They needed to walk around the building and go through the front. A glance left. Good, Sinker was still there, frowning at his phone. His own buzzed for the nth time in the past few minutes in his pocket and he ignored it. Sinker was probably texting one of the chats, updating them on the situation. They had more pressing matters at hand. 

They rounded the corner and raced into the building, throwing the door open, skipping steps as they hurried into the exhibit. Wolffe barreled his way down the path, shoving past the few people scattered along the trail who didn’t get out of his way. He might have growled at one person who gave him a stink eye but that didn’t matter. No signs of lost little brothers along the path or the bridge. 

He glanced down as he hurried across the bridge. “Good, he didn’t fall into the nets,” he said, only half-registering them as coming from his own mouth. “Keep up,” he barked at Sinker, who had been falling behind, about two steps behind where he had been. 

Across the bridge, into the smaller exhibit and still no glimpses. He wasn’t where Wolffe had last seen him. He wasn’t in the section right past where he had last seen him. The end of the building, the stairs. Not on the stairs. Down the stairs, don’t trip, don’t fall, shove open the door. The door slammed open from the force and he raced through the frame. He turned to his right, and— 

There was Comet. 

Deep breath. The poor ad’ika looked frightened out of his mind, eyes taking in the sight of his brothers. Scanning him quickly, Wolffe couldn’t detect any injuries on him. Thank Force. Sunglasses gone, hat askew and clothes rumbled, but no signs of injury. His shoulders dropped ever so slightly and he stepped over to his vod’ika, leaning down so they were at approximate eye level. 

“W-Wolffe,” Comet whimpered. Oh, poor child. “Wolffe! I’m so sorry! I was still looking at the monkeys and I thought I was next to you still but it turned out to be a guy who looks like you from behind and I tried looking for you but you were already gone and by the time I was out here, I remembered I shouldn’t move if I got lost but I didn’t want to go back inside the building and so I thought here was better than anywhere else, and—”

“Shh, we’re here, you’re safe,” Wolffe whispered, cutting off the ramblings that had sped up as he said more. Tears glistened in the corners of Comet’s eyes and the weight that had lifted off Wolffe’s shoulders resettled with twice the force. He reached forward and pulled the little rascal into a gentle hug.

“I was so worried you wouldn’t find me! An’ I lost my sunglasses but I’m not sure how. That was so much worse than getting sidetracked in the grocery store.”

His arms tightened. “Shh, it’s okay. I’m sorry, vod’ika. It’s not your fault. You did what you were supposed to do, that’s a good thing. It helped us find you. I’m so sorry. It’s not your fault, it was mine. I should’ve been paying more attention and I will pay more attention from here on out. I’m sorry. Don’t worry about the sunglasses; they’re replaceable but you aren’t.” 

An idea popped into his head. “Ah, you’re too big for this, but screw it.” He lifted Comet off the ground and half-set him on his hip, one arm under his legs to hold him up, the other wrapped around his back. Comet latched on, burrowing closer and clinging. His head found the nook between Wolffe’s neck and left shoulder and buried in, arms taut across his neck and shoulders, hat knocked back further. 

Sinker stepped up to Wolffe’s left, feet light, and pulled the hat from the black hair. With a glance at Wolffe, he opened the backpack and shoved it inside. Zipper pulled up, he hesitated, then threw himself at the duo. Arms tightened around both backs and the teen dipped his head near Comet’s ear, mumbling his own soothing words and apologies. 

The three stood there, wrapped together for a minute before Sinker pulled away when the door opened and a small family shuffled out. Eyes flickered at them, trying to be respectful but also curious. Wolffe watched them scurry down the path and make their exit. Sharing a look with his silver-haired brother, Wolffe made his way through the gardens and around the posters himself, Sinker walking as close as he dared. At the exit, they stopped. Where to go…?

Glancing around, Wolffe noticed they weren’t too far from the playground they had eaten lunch at, the children’s zoo on the opposite end of the expanse of grass. He told his plan to Comet, who nodded stiffly against his shoulder. With his right hand, he reached out for Sinker. The teen complied quietly, who also nodded when Wolffe told him the plan. 

Wolffe tried to walk as evenly and gently as he could, careful not to jostle Comet too much. His grip on Sinker stayed firm as they made their way to the park. 

The equipment was much less crowded than last time. Normal closing time having long since past, the other families had to have been there for the presentation and were killing time and energy. Laughter and the sounds of childhood memories in the making still rang out but nowhere near the roar it had been earlier in the day. Only a handful of picnic tables were taken; ones that were held exhausted parents, the odd older sibling, and a grandparent here and there. 

Picking the closest table, Wolffe sat down. “Gotta move your leg, bud,” he whispered to the boy in his arms. Comet let Wolffe swing his leg around and readjust him so they could both sit comfortably. The backpack was wrestled off and placed on the table, contents presumably jumbled up in Wolffe’s frantic search. He leaned his back against the table and Comet curled himself tighter around his ori’vod, legs across his lap and arms tight around his chest, face buried in his side. Wolffe’s left hand came up on its own accord and started rubbing soothing circles into Comet’s back.

Sinker gingerly sat to Wolffe’s right. He folded his hands in his lap and looked out at the children running around on the equipment. 

At last, Wolffe was able to drag his phone out of his pocket and turn it on. No doubt, Sinker had been messaging one or possibly both chats while they’d looked. And the likelihood of Boost, being Boost, responding and goading in at least one of them was sky-high. 

There were thirty-three notifications from the Wolfpack group chat. Ka’ra gaa'tayl kaysh. Opening the chat and scrolling to where he’d left off, Wolffe saw the last message he’d sent in his haste to turn off his phone and start looking for Comet.

Grr

Besides, I was goifjdaskljakldsa

Booster Seat

Uh, Wolffe? Why’d you…do that?

???

Curveball

Uh oh

We’re in big trouble now

Booster Seat

What happened?

Curveball

Comet’s gone

Booster Seat

Jfkldasjkldaj WHAT

HOW DO YOU LOSE HIM HE’S SO CLINGY

Curveball

Don’t tell buir

Wolffe’s reactions are kinda funny tho

Booster Seat

Do tell

Curveball

Well, besides the lecturing me part. That sucks.

He’s hardcore panicking rn

Guess we’re retracing our steps oop

Booster Seat

Is he gonna ask anyone if they’ve seen him?

Curveball

His brain cells are turned off so no

Booster Seat

Kjasdfk;klas;klfadskjadsfkl

😂😂😂

Curveball

Headed back through the primates now

OMG HE LOOKS LIKE AN ACTUAL WOLF

People are literally JUMPING out of the way

Booster Seat

Buir’s looking at me funny stooooop fdkjfkasjs 

I’m trying my best not to cry laugh!!!!

Curveball

“Good, he didn’t fall into the nets”

Run Wolffe Run

Wait, no, wait for me!!!

Wayii, slow down!

Booster Seat

I’m dying. I’m dead. You’ve killed me. 

I’m seriously gonna get in trouble with buir soon 

But don’t stop

Curveball

We’ve found him

Please don’t tell buir

Booster Seat

I promise

There were many options Wolffe had to deal with this. The one he decided on probably wasn’t the best, or the most mature, but it was his favorite. Nothing like a little brotherly affection, right?

Grr has renamed Curveball to Stinker

Stinker

Hey!

Booster Seat

You should’ve seen that coming, vod’ika

Stinker

Maybe, but that doesn’t make me like it any more

Grr

:3 Suffer

Booster Seat

w h a T did I just see

Stinker

My eyes! I’m scarred for life now

Grr

Good. Suffer.

Booster Seat

I think I liked you better when you were at college

Grr

I liked you better then, too

Stinker

Great, now that that’s settled, let’s not lose Comet again

Booster Seat

Yeah, that’s pretty important, Wolffe

Grr

I hate you both

With that, Wolffe turned off his phone and put it away before turning to Sinker with a frown, who was pocketing his own phone. “That really was unnecessary, you know. Sorry for the lecturing, but the texts? Not needed to be done that way.” His now empty hand rested on Comet’s leg.

Sinker was smart enough to look slightly guilty. “It was kinda funny, though,” he mumbled. Wolffe leveled him with a stare. “But I won’t do it again and I’ll help you more next time,” he amended. 

Wolffe nodded once. “I thought so.” Sinker continued to stare at the playground. A frown etched itself onto his face and he huffed to himself. Wolffe rolled his eyes. “Go swing or whatever, I don’t care. Just stay in sight.”

The silver-haired teen ran off like a cheetah with his brother’s permission. Wolffe turned his attention back to the little brother still curled around him. 

“Wolffe, ’m really sorry,” Comet muttered into his chest after a moment of quiet. Or, as quiet as it could be with kids shouting on the playground a few yards away.

“You’re okay, vod'ika.” Wolffe ran a hand through Comet’s hair, ruffling it somewhat. “As I said, you did what you were supposed to. I’ll pay better attention in the future." 

Comet propped his chin up on Wolffe’s chest and gave a tiny, sad smile. "Can I go swing with Sinker?”

“Yeah. Stick close to him." 

He took off, leaving Wolffe at the picnic table with the backpack and thoughts and feelings to sort through. 

—

When Sinker and Comet were finally ready to venture out to the rest of the zoo, they had time left for one more exhibit before they had to meet up with Boost and buir for the fluorescence demonstration. The sun had begun to set, casting long shadows and an orange glow over everything. Light jackets, tucked into the proper backpacks before the groups had split, were thrown on as the evening chill settled in.

Comet kept squinting, even with his hat back on, as they made their way to the birds of prey, which they had compromised on. Wolffe took off his sunglasses and gave them to Comet. He could handle more stares if it meant his vod'ika was more comfortable. 

This time, Wolffe made sure he had a hand in both his brothers. Sinker to his right, Comet to his left. This way, even if he couldn’t physically see one of them, he still had the reassurance they were still there. Neither protested; Comet looked like he’d have grabbed Wolffe’s hand if he hadn’t offered it first anyway.

His phone buzzed again. "Sinker?” he prompted. 

With his free hand, Sinker pulled out his own phone. “Boost sent another one of buir’s jokes.” He cleared his throat and put on an exaggerated drawl. “What’s the opposite of a fancy dog? A meerkat.”

“What’s a meerkat, again?” Comet asked, pulling himself closer to Wolffe’s side.

“Timon in Lion King is one,” Wolffe answered. 

The lightbulb above his head was almost visible. “Oh, yeah. We passed by them earlier, didn’t we?”

Two nods in response. “Yeah, you were more eager to see the giraffes,” Sinker said. 

Comet nodded to himself. The trio lapsed into silence until they were in sight of the “Yavin Birds of Prey Aviary”. 

Silence accompanied the trio at this exhibit, the antithesis of the penguin cove. Had that really been that morning? Not even twelve hours ago. Force, what a long day it became. If someone had told Wolffe a few days ago that today would consist of splitting into groups per his own suggestion, losing Comet, finding Comet, a gazillion dad jokes, and a fluorescence demonstration, he’d have laughed in their face.

“Only the owls are really awake,” Comet noted, his voice ringing in the nigh-empty room. 

Wolffe gave a low hum in acknowledgment. He leaned against some railing or another, watching the other two walk about. One other couple stood by the eagles, dead on their feet and swaying towards each other. Looks like it had been a long day for everyone.

The skylights drifted from deep orange to violet to navy to black, slow and delicate, soothing over the aches of the day like a worn, favored blanket. Had they been out in the country, a dazzling array of stars would have poked through the endless black, displaying the galaxy for all. So close to the city, the small pinpricks were satellites and planes, a backdrop to the skyline filled with lighted windows and blank spaces. 

It was easy to lose track of time staring at such a sight. Time was an odd, fickle thing. Stretching anxious situations longer, shortening precious moments to a blur. Freezing in place when contemplating the world, galaxy, universe. All too much yet far too little.

“How much longer?” Sinker asked, sliding up next to Wolffe, snapping him from his reverie. 

As if on cue, their phones buzzed.

Booster Seat

You guys need to hurry up this is amazing

Buir is DECKED in glow sticks

Grr

Proof or it didn’t happen

Booster Seat

Attached: Plo-more-like-Glo-Koon.jpeg

Stinker

Oh, I have to save that

Grr

Same

Stinker

What an icon

Booster Seat

He says thank you Sinker

Stinker 

Lol 

“With that amount of glow sticks, he’ll be easy to find,” Sinker commented. 

Comet stood on tiptoe, trying to get a peak. Wolffe lowered his phone and showed him the picture. His eyebrows shot towards his hairline. “Woah. I didn’t know that many could even fit on a person.”

“He’s a giant, walking glow stick,” Wolffe agreed, putting the phone up and extending his hands to his brothers. Energy renewed thrummed between them again. They had a presentation to crash. “Let’s go.” 

—

How do you find a giant, walking, glow stick of a dad? By having eyes. Given that it was a fluorescent show, everything was aglow in neon greens, blues, pinks, and oranges. But all of those in close proximity and moving? Easily buir, and a sight to see. Not even the trees had that many glow sticks on them. 

“I’m glad you all decided to stick around,” buir greeted them. They all let it go, teetering on the edge of exhaustion that would be whisked away when the festivities began soon.

Rather, all but Sinker. “You’re my ride home, I had to stay,” he grumbled. The lights reflected off his silver hair, tie-dying it bright and eye-catching, hats and sunglasses having been taken off at the aviary. Groans rang out.

“Somehow he made it worse,” Wolffe caught Boost griping under his breath.

“How was the end of your day?” buir asked politely. “Boost and I had a zootastic time.”

Sinker gave a half-hearted shrug but responded, “Tiring,” when Boost nudged him in the ribs. 

“It was a unique experience,” Comet replied smartly.

“We survived,” Wolffe said. Buir turned to him, and he stepped closer, addressing the perplexed expression. Making sure the others couldn’t hear, he expanded. “Something happened that might make Comet a bit jumpy for the rest of the night. We took care of it. It can wait until tomorrow when we aren’t so tired.” 

Buir clasped him on the back. “Good to know. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

Wolffe let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. He turned back to his brothers. “What do you snots want to do first?” They all mocked offense and gave their answers, launching into a night of fun.

They quickly found out there aren’t many naturally bioluminescent creatures on land, and most of them were small and creepy crawlers. Glowworms and fireflies, and a certain kind of snail. Marine animals, on the other hand, there were aplenty. The ones the zoo did have were on display: a respectable aquarium for various fish and a glass case with the terrestrial ones. Zookeepers who had a penchant for acting put on multiple shows that were “fun and edumacational” for kids. 

Worm-on-a-strings that glowed had been handed out, along with glow sticks. Every Koon had at least one glow stick bracelet on; Boost later sneak-attacked them into wearing some on their heads. Comet got a glow-in-the-dark penguin painted on his cheek. 

Giant, glow stick tic tac toe. Making zoo animals out of glow sticks. Neon, bright bubbles that, when popped, left a burst of color on what it landed. One station directed how to make a firefly jar to— temporarily, they stressed— hold the bugs. Ring tosses with bracelets, glowing paints. A certain presentation involved tossing various glow sticks into the air as responses to what the kids learned. 

Vivacious and vibrant in the dark, laughter and cheers filled the night as friends, families, and strangers shared a luminous evening to remember.

—

Wolffe stared at the picture frame in his hands. The frame was decorated with animals of all shapes and sizes, the small zoo logo in the left corner. Inside the frame rested a picture of the Koon brothers, covered in glow sticks and worn out but all with various sizes of smiles plastered on. His younger brothers had raced to the computer to print out the picture as soon as they stepped back inside their home. A better print-out, on photo paper and not copy paper, was to be printed in the next few days, but they had wanted Wolffe to have the picture as soon as possible.

“Now you’ll have something to take to college to remember today,” Comet had insisted. Boost and Sinker had nodded fervently in agreement.

Their last stop of the night had been at the small shop by the exit. Buir had decided to let them all get one reasonable thing as a memento, especially since their trips to the zoo were few and far between with their usually busy schedule. 

Comet found a stuffed rockhopper penguin and immediately named it Vandor— it looked like penguins were setting up to be his latest obsession. Boost got a zoology book which, looking back at his actions throughout the day, made sense. Sinker wanted Wolffe to get a tiny wolf figurine but got it for himself when Wolffe told him no. 

That had been the turning point. As much as Wolffe insisted he didn’t need to get anything, Sinker pressed that he did. Soon enough, Comet and Sinker had banded together with him. They scoured the shop for the perfect object. When they approached him with the frame and a picture picked out, he couldn’t say no. His vision might have blurred for a moment but they didn’t need to know that. 

A knock at his bedroom door had him set the frame back down on his desk. He rose and opened the door. There stood Comet. “Aren’t you supposed to be asleep? It’s late, vod’ika.”

“I know, but I was having a hard time falling asleep. Can I sleep in here instead?”

After what they had gone through today, it was the least he could do. “Fine. No snoring.” Comet gave him a lopsided grin and slipped past him. He launched himself onto Wolffe’s bed, digging himself into the covers. 

“What?” he asked cheekily when Wolffe turned to look at him.

Wolffe rolled his eyes half-heartedly. “I’ll go get ready for bed. No drooling on my pillow, either.”

Comet gave him a mock salute as he went to brush his teeth.

Twenty minutes later, Boost came in to grab something from his desk. He paused when he saw Wolffe lying on his bed, Comet draped across his left side on his stomach, arms and legs sprawled out. Wolffe was scrolling through his phone, the lights off. Boost opened his mouth to say something but Wolffe glared at him and put a finger to his lips. “He just fell asleep,” he whispered.

Boost hesitated. Instead of grabbing whatever he came for, he grabbed his pajamas and started to get ready for bed. When done, he walked over to Wolffe’s bed. “Dogpile!” he exclaimed softly, before flopping straight down onto the mattress and his older brother. Wolffe let out an “oof” at the impact but otherwise didn’t react as Boost settled in.

Ten minutes after that, Sinker slinked into the room. “Wolffe?” 

Wolffe grunted and moved a hand from his face which belonged to a still awake and very annoying Boost. Sinker took that as his cue to come over. He was already in his pajamas and his eyebrows furrowed as he took in what was happening.

Boost had positioned himself on his side against Wolffe’s right side, right under Wolffe’s elbow which was bent from holding his phone up. He’d taken to bugging Wolffe by throwing his hand out and letting it rest wherever it landed and waiting to see if Wolffe would move it or not. It got old real quick. 

“Uh,” Sinker looked unsure how to continue. “I was gonna ask if you knew where Comet was since he wasn’t in his bed, but it looks like you’ve got an extra blanket there.”

Boost lifted his head slightly. “It’s a dogpile now. Join us!”

“More like a wolf pile,” Sinker quipped with a smirk. 

Siblings have to make things harder than necessary, of course, so Sinker climbed over all three of his brothers, lifted Comet to be even more on top of Wolffe, and squished himself into the space he made. “G’night, guys,” he mumbled. He made himself comfortable and was out like a light. 

Wolffe and Boost shared a look. “You better fall asleep that fast,” Wolffe said, nudging the top of Boost’s head with his elbow. 

“Only if you get off your phone.”

“Deal.”

Little did they know, as buir went to check on his boys like he did every night before heading to bed himself, he felt the need to check on the older two’s room first. The door had been opened a smidge, the lights off. He knocked gingerly and cracked the door open more. 

There were his boys, all cuddled up and fast asleep, somehow all fitting on the twin bed. Warthog had wandered in at one point and was curled up against their feet. His chest filled with warmth as he observed the sight. He took a picture or two, smiling to himself. On his way out, he made sure to close the door. What a sweet sight after a draining day. It was begging to be shared in the Fett parents chat.

—

Chat: Fett Dynasty

Think Outside The Fox

Jate vaar’tur, my lovely aliit

Attached: wolfpack-snuggles.jpeg

[Multiple people are typing]

Werewolf? There Wolffe!

N O T A W O R D 

[37 new messages]

-

Mando’a Translations

Buir: parent

Vod’ikase: Little brothers (plural)

Aliit: Family

Ori’vod: Big brother

Wayii: Good grief! 

Vod’ika: Little brother (singular)

Ad’ika: Little one, son, daughter

Adike: Plural of Ad’ika (see above)

Di’kut: Idiot

Ka’ra gaa'tayl kaysh: Stars help him. 

Jate vaar’tur: Good morning

Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it. Congrats on getting to the end! 

[whatdoyouthinkmyjobis]

Hunters on the Hellmouth

masterlist

first chapter

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AN: This chapter was inspired by BTVS 7.09 “Never Leave Me.”

Warnings: threats of rape, implied torture

Chapter 25: House Full of Hostages

The sun was barely up, but the Scoobies were already nervously waiting in the living room while Buffy and Dean were busy with the vampire upstairs. "I'm not sure I've heard a worse idea," said Willow, "and that includes the time Xander covered a pepperoni pizza with M&Ms."

"I knew The Supremer would have its moment in the sun,” Xander replied.

“Spike killed a bunch of people, so Buffy and Dean brought him back to the house?” Dawn asked in disbelief.

“Willow’s back in the house,” said Anya.

“That’s different,” snapped Dawn. “Not like you can judge.”

“I’m just saying we’ve seen this from Buffy before,” Anya continued. “She’s not always with the group think of who to kill and who to not-kill. Frankly, I’m surprised Dean is going along with this lunacy. I thought he’d be more black and white and stabby about this. Plus, bonus he-man points for killing Buffy’s ex.”

“If Dean thought the best option was staking Spike, he would have done it,” said Sam, “but he thinks Spike’s more valuable alive at the moment.”

“It’s not just Spike.” Willow paced as she calculated the possible outcomes. “They think he’s being controlled by something. Okay, what if it pushes his big red murder buttons while he’s here? Or worse! What if it comes for him? I mean, it’s followed him from the school basement, to town, and to that old woman’s house. Who’s to say it won’t come here?”

“It already did,” Dawn said grimly.

“For being the head of the Kill The Bleached Bastard Club, you’ve been very quiet, Xander.”

Xander stood up and headed for the kitchen. “Anyone want some cereal? I hear it’s in peak season.”

Spike’s head pounded, a feat since he didn’t have any blood to pound. Several parts of his body ached and tingled the way it did when it was trying to heal, the way it did when he’d been in a fight.

He opened his eyes, but his vision was blurred, no doubt from the blow to his head. From the smell, he could tell he was in Buffy’s house. It was a concentrated scent. The vanilla extra sweet, the lilac fresh, the sex overpowering. Last time he’d smelled this was in his lower, more perverse moments when he’d sneaked into Buffy’s bedroom to rifle through her underwear drawer and steal souvenirs.

Something was holding down his arms, his legs, his body. He was tied to a chair, but why? “Buffy?”

“Sorry, buddy boy, it’s just me,” said an unfriendly, rumbling voice.

“‘Buddy boy?’ Are we besties now, Dean?”

The prior night came back to him in flashes. A room full of vampires. Drusilla. He’d begged to be staked, but instead, he was in Buffy’s home. She didn’t know the danger her mercy put everyone in.

“Why ‘aven’t you killed me?” Spike asked again, his vision coming into focus. “Know you’re aching to.”

Sitting on the end of the bed, Dean set his elbows on his knees and leaned in as if about to share a secret. “Because of Buffy.”

Momentarily delighted, Spike ran his tongue over his lip, licking the stale blood. “Got you on a short leash, does she?”

Dean looked at his hands and rubbed them together like he was trying to brush off dirt. “I hated you the moment I laid eyes on you. Hated the way you talk, the way you move. Hated the hungry way you look at her. And then I found out you were a goddamn vampire.”

“Stop. You’ll make a monster blush.”

Dean rose from the bed, scratching his neck, and wandered over to a collection of photos on Buffy’s bulletin board. He had probably seen the pictures a hundred times as he passed in an out of her bedroom, but he inspected them silently as if they were brand new.

“You know what I like about Buffy?” Dean asked.

Spike rolled his eyes. “Do tell the inner workings of your torrid love affair.”

“She has so much life in her.”

Spike snorted. Buffy was a nightmare. A killing machine. A creature of the night deadlier than any he’d ever known. Life wasn’t her gift.

Undeterred, Dean continued, wistfulness in his voice. “She wants to grab all the life she can. Most hunters I know are dead men walking, withdrawn alcoholics just waiting for the inevitable. But Buffy, she has hopes and dreams and friends, the sort of friends who would put themselves in danger for her. Good friends.

“And for some crazy ass reason, she considers you one of those friends.”

This was not what Spike expected to hear when tied to a chair. “She, she said that? Those words?”

“She keeps saying, ‘Spike has a soul now,’ as if that can erase your past. But I was reading the other week about how vampires are empty husks led around by their demons. And reading your history, William the Bloody. Maybe that was you. Somehow I can’t imagine a blood-thirsty demon wanting to shack up with a soul.”

His piercing gaze on Spike, Dean said, “I know the look on a man’s face when he’s been forced to do something terrible.”

“You ever ‘ave a demon in you?” Spike asked.

Dean shook his head but said nothing.

“It’s like those cartoons with an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other, only the devil is alone and steering,” Spike said with a sneer. “I learned ‘ow to wrestle control back from this piss poor roommate. Thought getting my soul back would put me firmly in the driver seat, but I still ‘ear it growling up a storm, telling me what to do.”

“What’s it telling you now?” Dean asked.

Spike flexed his arms, but the rope held tight. They weren’t taking chances. “It wants me to rip your ‘andsome face off, cut you to bits. It doesn’t like you at all.”

Dean snorted as if Spike had told a pathetic joke.

But it wasn’t a joke. This wasn’t the time for posturing, for cock fights. He needed to understand the threat that sat before him. “It doesn’t want to kill ‘er. It wants to rape 'er, destroy ‘er. I will suck Buffy dry while I fuck ‘er, when she comes back, she’ll be all mine. Maybe I won’t kill you, just snap your neck and leave you paralyzed, keep you around as a blood donor, ‘ang you up in the bedroom so you can watch us ‘aving a good shag. Real question is, do I kill the little bit, take ‘er as she is, or let ‘er ripen a few more years?”

“You ain’t gonna do any of that.” Darkness took over Dean’s face.

“You know what I’m capable of.” Spike wasn’t sure himself anymore; the demon’s voice was worse than he remembered.

“I know what I’m capable of. If you’ve turned evil sock puppet, I’ll do what she can’t.”

Buffy wouldn’t be able to kill Spike and he knew it. She’d lost all perspective dropping him, a live grenade, in with her friends. He needed to make sure Dean would do the right thing despite what she wanted. ”Raping Buffy’s just unfinished business. She tell you about that? Tried to fuck her a few months ago, but didn’t finish the job. And she still likes ‘aving me around.”

Dean smirked before twisting back and socking Spike in the jaw, knocking his chair over and loosening a few teeth.

Buffy was searching for another phone number, hoping to find Giles, when she heard banging up in her bedroom. “What happened?” she asked Dean as he came down the stairs.

“Spike’s chair fell over.”

“Really?” She grabbed Dean’s right hand and rubbed her thumb over his red knuckles. “Put some ice on that. How’s the rest of you?”

He pointed to the bandage on his neck. “Just a new scar for the collection.”

“And the other thing?”

Wincing, Dean adjusted himself. “Not gonna feel like screwing tonight, if that’s what you want to know.”

“That was sort of off the table anyway seeing as there’s a vampire in our bedroom.”

Poking at the mix of business cards and paper scraps on the counter, Buffy tried to remember which numbers she’d called. Giles wasn’t answering his cell or his landline. The coven that helped Willow heal said they hadn’t heard from him in months. She picked up a heavy card on linen stock and tapped it on the counter. It was a simple design, just a phone number and the name Quentin Travers embossed in gold letters.

“I’m going to call the Watcher’s Council,” she said to Dean, who was watching her as he iced his hand.

“You need a gun that big for Spike?”

“I’m sure they’re chomping at the bit to help a vampire. No, Dean, this is bigger than Spike. It’s bigger than us. Whatever is controlling him, I’m sure it’s not planning to gift the world with pocket pandas and chocolate. Then there’s my blood-soaked visions.”

She crossed the kitchen and buried her face in his plaid shirt. Still smelling of basement dirt, he felt warm and solid in her arms. Present. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Dean, but I feel alone in this. Yes, you’re here. We have Sam and Willow, but we can only hit so much if we don’t know where to strike. Without Giles, I -- I feel lost.”

Tucking a lock of loose hair behind her ear, Dean said, “I know the feeling. So what do I need to know ‘bout these Watcher guys?”

“I’m hoping they’ll help me find Giles. I’m afraid they’re going to send someone with a disapproving scowly face and stuck up accent. Someone I’m going to have to argue with. Someone who’s going to get all nosy about you and where you’re from.”

“What happens if they find out?”

“Don’t know.” Buffy stood up and smoothed his shirt. “If they try anything, I’ll put on my protective girlfriend pants and rescue you.”

“My hero,” he said, leaning down to kiss her.

“There’s a crazed vampire upstairs, and you’re making out?” said Sam, who’d stolen into the kitchen.

Buffy estimated she’d had three seconds not thinking about the crisis they were in, three seconds away from the brink of tears, but before she could respond, Dean was embracing her. “Sammy, you’re interrupting a very important strategy meeting.”

“I can see that,” he replied, eyebrows up and dimples of disapproval on display. “You’ve got a room full of nervous people who want in on the plan.”

“Spike’s been in contact with the mysterious It more than any of us. We need to find out what It’s told him, how It’s communicating with him, and how It’s making him kill,” said Buffy.

“Do you actually see him sharing any of that info?” Dean asked.

“Maybe. We’ll start with kid gloves. He was pretty messed up at that house.”

“Let me know when you want me to step in for the messy stuff,” said Dean. “Maybe we should take him somewhere else so Dawn doesn’t hear?”

How long had he been alone with Spike? It couldn’t have taken her more than half an hour to shower and change, but he was already beating on the vampire. Once, she’d seen Dean cry, near hysterics triggered by memories of Sam’s death, of consequential decades spent in Hell torturing and being tortured. Knowing what he’d been through, how could she ask him to step into that role again? “I don’t want you to step in for the messy stuff.”

“You think it won’t go that far?”

“I’m not saying I don’t need you. There’s plenty to do. I’m saying the torture tools can stay in the trunk.”

“How can I help?”

Fucking grocery getter for a monster, Dean grumbled to himself. He appreciated that Buffy didn’t want him involved in interrogating Spike; he didn’t want her to see him like that, to know what he was capable of. Still, he’d rather be back at the house keeping an eye on things than out buying pig’s blood for his girlfriend to feed the vampire. Willow, nervously wringing her hands in the passenger seat, knew all the places in town they could hit for this unpalatable snack run.

“Can you turn that off?” she asked.

Dean bit his tongue and ejected the cassette. “Not a Metallica fan?”

“I like rock and alternative stuff, but that was making me so nervous, my skin was all prickly.”

“Relaxes me,” Dean said.

“You’re joking, right?”

“It’s easy to get lost in. Their early stuff has these beautiful, complicated melodies and long ass guitar solos you just don't hear anymore, which is one of modern rock’s biggest tragedies. Tell ya what, I got a copy of this on Sam’s computer from a concert they did with the San Francisco orchestra, and I bet you’ll like it backed by violins and stuff.”

“And if I don’t?”

“Then Buffy won’t be the only person in the house with shit taste in music.”

Willow snapped to look at something out the window and yelled, “Stop the car! Stop the car!”

Dean slammed on the brakes, and she bolted down the sidewalk after a short blond boy in a large black coat. Quickly finding a place to park, Dean chased after her and found her scuffling in an alley.

She had the boy pinned against the wall and was practically spitting in his face. “You don't know the first thing about pain, but I'm willing to give a lesson.”

“Help me! Please, save me! She’s trying to kill me!” shouted the kid when he spotted Dean.

“Hey, I was speechifying!” whined Willow.

“Ginger, you wanna fill me in?” Dean asked. He’d never seen her violent and pushy, but it was hard to believe this trembling kid with a puddle of piss forming at his feet could possibly be any threat.

“Remember Warren?” Her voice was dark, dangerous.

“Killed Tara. Suffered the consequences. Got a pretty strong mental picture.”

“Andrew here was one of his lackeys.”

“I didn’t kill Tara!” Andrew protested, trembling. “I had nothing to do with that. Buffy beat us so bad, I was packing up to leave town.”

“Shut up, you worm. Dean, check his bag.”

Near the mouth of the alley was a brown paper sack with a blossoming bloodstain. “Please, don’t be a cat. Please, don’t be a cat,” Dean muttered. “Looks like someone else went to the butcher. We got some fresh meat and a whole lotta blood. One of ‘em popped open, but he had eight quarts.”

“Pull the car around. Do you think he’ll fit in the trunk?”

Dean huffed. “I can fit three of him in the trunk.”

Xander and Anya searched Andrew’s coat while the Winchesters tied him to a chair in Dawn’s room, a pile of stuffed animals transfixed on the scene.

“I won’t tell you anything,” their new captive squeaked, “no matter how roughly you manhandle my body. Seriously, you should maybe touch my body some more.”

Sam rolled his eyes and left.

“You don’t want me handling you, kid. I’d take your fingernails first, then start asking questions,” Dean said before following his brother out the door.

Standing in the hallway, they could hear Xander and Anya start their good cop, bad cop routine. “We’re gonna make you squeal, little piggie!”

“Today has only increased in crazy,” Sam sighed.

“Double the hostages, double the fun?”

Sam shook his head. “Where are all the pieces?”

“Whatever the big boss is has visited Dawn, Willow and Fangs McGee, who’s been killing people on request, but cuz a that chip, he ain’t supposed to be able to do that. The little one --” there was a smack and thump behind Dawn’s bedroom door, “fancies himself some sorta criminal mastermind. Willow said he can conjure up some pretty sick spells, so she’s thinkin’ he’s connected to whatever hell else is going on.”

“And he was one of the people who killed Tara?”

“No, he was in on the world conquering part of it, but was seriously afraid of Buffy beating the shit outta him. You shoulda seen him in the alley with Willow. Pissed himself.”

“Like all criminal masterminds,” Sam said dryly.

“She did skin his buddy.”

Xander and Anya came out of Dawn’s room looking stern before closing the door and dissolving into a giggle fit. “Did you see that?! I made him cry!”

“You’re a good bad cop,” Xander beamed.

“He was annoying me, and I wanted to slap him, so I went ahead and slapped him!”

“Oh, nice line there about the fingernails, Dean. You really helped get him ready to spill. ‘Course he jumps every time Willow’s mentioned too. Where is Will?”

“She’s downstairs folding laundry with Dawn,” Sam replied.

“Sinister, thy name is Willow. Okay, An, you go relax for a bit, and I’ll go pretend to be the weasel’s friend.”

“Feel free to turn up my demon reputation but gloss over how I can’t bring any of that pain anymore.”

“Never underestimate your ability to cause people pain,” said Xander before ducking back into the bedroom.

Anya smiled a love-swoony smile. “Xander’s so sweet. He still believes in me.” Pleased with her accomplishments, she practically skipped down the stairs.

Over an hour later, Buffy, looking exhausted and downcast, found Dean in the kitchen making a late grilled cheese lunch with Dawn. She fell into Dean’s arms, groaning as he rubbed her back. “Not going so hot, baby?”

“The whole blood-eating thing is super gross,” she said into his chest. “It has to digest or absorb or whatever happens inside a vampire. I skipped the biology lesson. He’s too exhausted to explain anything.”

“I’m sure that’s it,” Dawn grumbled.

“What do you mean?”

“He always wants to spend time with you, right? Now he’s got you alone in your bedroom feeding him. Spike’s gotta be thinking that’s pretty hot.”

“Ew. This just got worse.”

Dean held her face in his hands and smiled at her. He hated seeing her stressed like this, hated her feeling backed against a wall, hated her feeling so lost. “We got a pile of sandwiches with your name on them.”

“Not true,” said Dawn, grabbing two. “The ones with pickles are mine.”

“You need to eat and sleep,” Dean said gently. “Go curl up on the couch an’ take a nap. You’ve been up all night, barely slept the night before. No use grinding yourself down. I’ll make sure he stays tied up.”

Grabbing a non-pickled sandwich, Buffy said through bites, “Sam’s sort of taking up the entire couch, and last time you were alone with Spike, you punched him.”

“He deserved it.”

“No doubt, but I don’t want to lose you. I’ll sleep eventually.”

Sleepy eyed, Sam stumbled in. “I’m gonna head out for a few hours. Shower. Change.”

“Give me a minute,” Dean said before his brother disappeared. “What do you need me to do, Girly?”

Willow and Buffy sat on Willow’s bed, arms around their knees, listening to Andrew’s whimpering and Spike’s muttering.

“I could organize the basement,” Willow said, her voice hollow, her eyes far away. “Or I could build some sort of padded panic room for the panicking.”

Buffy grabbed her friend’s hand and squeezed. “Dean said you were a badass when you spotted Andrew.”

Pale, eyes wide, Willow nodded. “I-I figured he couldn’t be good news, but…” She leaned over and curled into a ball, her head on Buffy’s lap.

“Where does having him in the house fall on the weirdness scale?” Buffy asked, combing Willow’s hair with her fingers.

“You know that nightmare where you walk into class and there’s a test you forgot to study for?”

“Nightmare. Yeah. Sure, Will,” said Buffy dryly.

“It’s pass/fail, and I don’t remember any of the material.”

But it went beyond Andrew. Her mind buzzed with the past and a thousand what ifs. But something else was crowding out the flashbacks of Tara’s death.

Dread grew in Willow’s heart. Something was very wrong with Spike, she could feel it wafting off him, a similar disharmonious buzz as when she tried to get a read on the Winchesters. She’d noticed it a bit when she saw the demon in him, but brushed it off as a side effect of the spell. Now it was a war drum charge pounding on the other side of the wall.

Anya, working out some post-demon stress, had climbed deep into her bad cop role. So deep, Xander was having a hard time pulling her off Andrew, crying in the fetal position on the floor. “Anya, honey, that’s enough!”

“Isn’t this why you untied him, so the cowering would be more satisfying?”

“I’ll tell you anything, just keep the psycho chick away from me!”

“Let’s start with why you came back to Sunnydale.”

The bedroom was starting to reek of blood. Spike preferred the Buffy smell, but three quarts in, he was perking up, remembering.

“I didn’t know the bleedin’ chip ‘ad stopped working.”

“Would it have made a difference?”

“Don’t know. I don’t remember killing anyone. I mean, I know I did it, not denying that, but I don’t remember it. You know like ‘ow when you find a ticket stub in your pocket, and that proof in your ‘and is the only memory you have of a shoddy movie? It’s like that. I don’t know what I was thinking, feeling, doing, just that I turned and buried them.”

“Has that been happening a lot? The memory loss?”

Arms crossed and scowling, Dean stepped forward. “We have a bigger problem. Andrew is here. You know how he ties in.”

“Yeah, what of it?”

“Do you remember what happened in the basement last night?” Buffy asked. “You said Drusilla was there. You said she visited you in the school basement every day. What did she tell you, Spike?”

“That’s right. Dru was always there for me. Supporting me. Singing to me. She may ‘ave been mad, but that woman knows for love and loyalty, unlike some. Got myself resouled and was left to talk to hallucinations. ‘Ow’s that for a hello?”

Buffy rose from the edge of the bed and paced the room. “Spike, this isn’t about us.”

“It really isn’t,” Dean said. “This is about the sorry pickle you’ve got yourself in. Tied up. Confused. Still hungry. And right through that wall, answers. It’s you or him.”

“I know what you’re tryin, Dean, but I’m not falling for it.”

Buffy stiffened and looked around the room. “Spike, do you see Dean? Dean’s not here.”

Dean plunged his hand into Spike’s chest; sizzling, sharp, it felt like a lightning bolt to the heart.

Spike’s fangs descended. With a swift jerk, he broke the arms off the chair and swung at Buffy, scratching her face with the broken wood. He kicked her down and charged at the wall. Breaking through to Dawn’s room, Spike grabbed Andrew by the throat and bit him. Hands tugged at him, swatted him, but he clamped down harder. Andrew had to be stopped. A strong pair of small hands grabbed him by the shoulders and threw him into the door frame.

Spike shook his head, confused as to why he was suddenly on the floor, untied, and with a crowd gathered around a small blonde boy. Buffy stomped toward Spike, and kicked him in the face.

The tiredness made Buffy’s fingers stiff as she checked the lock on Spike’s manacles once again.

“Sure this will ‘old me? I don’t want to ‘urt anyone.”

Without answering, Buffy headed upstairs to her friends. She was tired of talking, of trying to figure out what was happening, of what she was even fighting. She wanted a giant plate of sweet and sour chicken and the freedom to sleep for three days.

Dawn was curled under Willow’s arm on the couch. Sitting on the coffee table in front of them, Buffy said, “I’ll call Dean. You can stay at his place until we get this sorted.”

“You shouldn’t have told him to leave, or, you know, invited a killer into the house,” Dawn grumbled.

“Thank you for the hindsight alert, but who else was going to patrol?”

Xander and Anya came downstairs. “Good news, Buff, is that Spike didn’t rip any electrical when he Hulked the wall. Bad news is there’s zero privacy for you and Dawn. The hardware store is closed, but if the Winchesters lend a hand, we can get it like new tomorrow.”

“Thank you. Anya?”

Anya, twisting one foot like a little girl, was staring wistfully at Xander.

“Earth to Anya?”

“Yes?”

“How’s Andrew?” Buffy asked.

“Sorry, with the interrogation, the fighting, and the manly construction talk, I started to feel a little aroused, which obviously pushed Andrew from my mind. Oh, well, the little twerp will live. I patched up his neck and tied him up again.”

“Other than Anya’s attraction to drywall, did we learn anything for all of this mess?” asked Willow.

“We did get our stoolie to sing,” said Anya, with a proud smile. “Andrew came back because he was having visions of a seal that he needed to give blood to for vague evil purposes. He was about to clarify, when KA-BAM! That’s the sound Spike made with the wall.”

“Did Spike tell you anything, Buffy?”

“What happened to Willow and Dawn has pretty much been an everyday occurrence with Spike, but he thought the ghosts were part of the soul guilt. He said he sees me and Drusilla the most. I yell at him, and Drusilla encourages him.”

“Good cop, bad cop!” Anya interjected.

“Maybe. He was talking to invisible Drusilla at the vamp house. Screaming at her. Upstairs, he was talking to Dean--”

“Oh God!” Dawn gasped. “So this baddie can look like anyone? Not just the dead? How do we know who’s real?”

Buffy sighed and unloaded the Winchesters’ secret. “Dean has died before. So’s Sam.”

Mouths agape, the Scoobies stared at Buffy. “Well, that explains your relationship a bit,” said Willow.

“Were you just not going to tell us this?” Xander asked. “Seems kind of important with a costume-loving evil on the loose.”

“A lot has happened in the last couple days, okay? It slipped my mind. Anyway, Spike thought he was talking to Dean, then he just...changed. He wasn’t even like the Spike who came to kill me in high school. He was different.”

“Perhaps we have a Manchurian Candidate situation,” said Xander, who was met with silent stares. “C’mon! It’s a classic! Okay, so Angela Lansbury has brainwashed her son for the Communist party. Every time she wants him to kill someone, she tells him to play solitaire, and gives him the mission when a certain card triggers his sleeper agent side. Only in our case, Spike is the son, the trigger is some unknown message from the undead person, and mystery baddie is evil Jessica Fletcher.”

“So what’s the mission?” asked Willow.

“When Spike broke free, he knocked me down, then went straight for Andrew, like he had a purpose. Anya, you said he was about to tell you what the seal is for. That has to be connected.”

“What now, Buff? Should we interrogate Andrew some more?”

“Stake Spike?”

“No.” Buffy stood up and stretched. “It’s past eight. Dinner, then plan. I’ll call Dean, and if someone could pick up a giant order of Chinese food, you will officially be my favorite.”

Leaving the phone to the important task of food fetching, she trudged up the stairs to the cellphone in her wrecked bedroom. She wanted a little privacy anyway. Her friends all expected her have answers, plans, foresight. With Dean, she could cry, maybe even gripe a little, and he respected her, still followed her lead even if it was something as distasteful as getting blood for Spike.

She’d just reached the top of the stairs when the lights went out and robed figures crashed through the windows and doors. Two bolted toward her, staves held high. She snatched one staff and butted the owner down the stairs, but the other sneaked past her. She chased him to Dawn’s room. With two daggers drawn, he stood over a whimpering Andrew. Grabbing one wrist, she spun the intruder around and headbutted him before yanking the blades from his hands. As she stabbed him in the chest, she swung back and gutted the second assassin who’d appeared behind her.

Checking that the upstairs was secure, she bolted downstairs calling for her sister. “She’s okay,” said Xander, standing over a bleeding body, Dawn shaking on the floor behind him.

Anya was by the broken back door, shaking awake Willow who was bleeding from a head wound.

“Looks like the house got the worst of it.”

Crouching over the assassin Xander had killed, Buffy felt a nauseating recognition. The robe. The runes branded over the eyes. “I know these guys. I’ve been dreaming about them for months. They’re the assassins in my visions. They -- they went straight for Andrew.”

“That makes sense,” said Anya. “If they’re connected to what was talking to Spike earlier, it knew who was here and where. Your house was a sieve even without the windows broken.”

“Spike,” Buffy whispered. “Has anyone checked on Spike?” She ran to the basement, practically tripping on the stairs. Against the wall hung an empty pair of manacles.

Spike’s head was throbbing again, and he could feel someone yanking on his arms as they tied him up. “You know, I’m getting right sick of being battered about.”

He opened his eyes to see the smirking face of Buffy lit by torchlight as robed figures with mutilated faces dug up a seal. “I told you there would be consequences. Andrew is possibly the most pathetic human I’ve ever met, yet you failed to kill him.” Two of her minions approached Spike with knives and began carving into his chest and stomach. He bit his tongue to deny her satisfaction. “Since he failed to bring me a blood sacrifice, you’ll have to do.”

Whatever he was tied to was hoisted up so he was parallel to the goat-faced seal below, his blood filling the grooves. “Buffy will stop you,” he hissed.

“Yes, Buffy. You didn’t kill her like I asked. You didn’t kill Dean either. Now they’re on to me. I was tired of hiding anyway, and I have some friends who want to play. Spike, do you want to meet a real vampire?”

The goat face disappeared under the pool of blood. The arms of the pentagram around it turned up and twisted to create a staircase. A gnarled grey hand struck the dirt, and a bony creature with a full set of spiny teeth rose from the ground and roared.

next chapter

[thebluesideofthemoon]

The Wall #49: SHEEP AND WOLVES

Welcome everybody to another entry of The Wall. On this week... your mom! Heh. Oh, I wish- I'm sure she's a wonderful lady. I said I was going to review Batman v. Superman but... eh, I then kind of lost interest and heat after a while- besides, the movie still sucks balls, so it's not like anything's changed. No, this week's review takes us on another stop of our international animated tour- Russia! The big mother of all cold herself, Mother Russia blessed us with this animated outing that was so good that it didn't get imported to the States. "Why might that be?" you're probably asking yourself, well I'll answer that right now: ... I HAVE NO IDEA! Maybe it was some sort of communication error (which wouldn't make sense as this movie has a fully dubbed English version, so... I 'unno), maybe they changed their minds at the last minute, or maybe because it's so mind-meltingly awful that they pulled the plug on its release before the studio would embarrass itself. Considering my last review it may be easy to assume that anything I would review afterwards would automatically be less positive. That may be true, but that doesn't mean that I wouldn't have good things to say about it- hell, last week I saw one of my favorite movies this year (which I'll review later), and I've been itching to gush about it here. But no, I'm going to talk about Sheep and Wolves instead because, what better way to transition into my Worst Movies of 2016 by going from one of the best animated movies of the year to one of the absolute worst? Let's dive in, why don't we~?

(Music: Undertale- CORE)

I don't mean to be disrespectful, I like to think I'm a nice person and I will give anyone a chance, unless you’re Zack Snyder, or David S. Goyer, or Warner Bros., in which case you can piss off any day now. So when I write the things I’m going to write, I don’t mean this as just me trying to be mean, but as a way to try and help a small studio like the one that made this movie understand why your product doesn’t work, so I will try to be as cold and clinical as I can to explain just what is wrong with this movie. But first the plot, and you might want to sit down for this one.

In this movie we have a wolf named Grey (voiced by Tom Felton. Yes, THAT Tom Felton) who is a goofy but kind wolf who wants to live life as a carefree spirit, that is until he crosses the path of a big bad wolf named Ragear (voiced by Rich Orlow, whom I’ve never heard of) who is adamant to become the new leader of their wolf pack since their current leader Magra (voiced by Jim Cummings. Yes, THAT one, too.). However, Ragear gets shut down by Magra by telling him that he will not be ascended to be leader of the pack unless he faces off in a duel with another wolf, who just so happens to be Grey. Grey steps up to the challenge and they’re due to fight in three days to see who is more fit to run the wolf pack. Meanwhile, Grey faces a bit of problem when a surprise he had planned turns out to dash the dreams of his girlfriend, Bianca (voiced by Ruby Rose. Yes, THAT- I’m not going to keep this gag going or we’ll be here all day), who thought Grey was going to ask for her hand (paw?) in marriage. She accuses him of being very immature and in desperate need of change. Trying to find a way to change, Grey stumbles into this caravan full of gypsies and he talks to their leader(?) named Mami (I don’t know who she’s voiced by) who gives Grey this potion to help him change, but things go south when Grey gets turned into a sheep and is not only unwelcome, but hunted down by the wolves due to sheep being their prey. So he runs away and ends up getting knocked out, only to wake up in the sheep village. He’s being taken care of by an ewe named Lyra (China Anne McClain), while being suspected of by this skeptic sheep named Zico (Ross Maraquand) who questions his whereabouts and goes on to find clues about this new mysterious sheep that just showed up in their home. Grey believes that he’s in a bad dream but then decides to blend in once he starts meeting the sheep folk. Meanwhile, Ragear becomes impatient by Magra and his ban to keep them from hunting prey like wolves (which for this universe doesn’t really make much sense), so instead of waiting for his duel like Magra ordered, he just kills Magra and ends up taking the position as the wolves’ leader and wants to lead the wolves to hunt for the sheep so they can eat… well, like wolves. Grey discovers this and now wants to protect the sheep from this possible massacre, while it becomes hard for him to keep his true identity intact with his new kin. How will all of this be resolved?

I don’t take this long trying to give a simple plot synopsis, but I wanted to break down this entire setup to give you a hint as to what’s wrong with this movie. If you want me to sum this movie up really quickly it’s just yet another “fish out of water” story, and with a twist that isn’t even that unique to this kind of movie. The movie is a bizarre combination of both Shrek 2 and Brother Bear in terms of plot, but it’s nowhere near as funny as the former, nor (while flawed) as engaging as the latter, and while I have serious problems with Brother Bear I can tell you it pulled this story off a LOT better than Sheep and Wolves.

Since I’m going to dip into my issues with this movie (which is a LOT of them) I may as well get my positives with the movie out of the way, because they’re very minimal- it’s actually just one: the movie is really pretty. While it’s pretty obvious that this is a low-budget movie thanks to the very small amount of environments featured in the movie, not to mention that just like Sing it shamelessly copy-and-pastes characters and shots everywhere, the scenery of the movie actually manages to be pretty stunning. I like how the environments look, they’re vividly-detailed, very colorful, and the lighting also manages to look really good, especially when they stand out against things like grass or the fur on the wolves. The animation itself is also not bad. It’s far more lively than something like, say, Ratchet and Clank, and it has an art style that suits the animation better than a movie like The Wild Life. Even though I have HUGE issues with the character design, they managed to make a really appealing-looking movie and I do think that’s something that deserves some serious credit. It’s obvious to me that the people working on this movie have some good talent in their hands, and I’m saying this because I stop being nice right here. Because the problems with this movie are far too many for me to recommend this as something anyone reading this should watch.

Let’s start with the character designs. While the general look of the movie is really appealing and colorful, the actual designs of the characters leave a lot to be desired. There’s no real better way for me to say this, but the characters all look like how a middle-school furry artist would draw his furry wolf OCs (original characters, for those of you that don’t know) when first starting on DeviantART. They’re far more humanoid than anthropomorphic, which really stands out with characters that have more stylized and cartoony designs. It’s almost as if the characters were all designed by completely different artists, however this is an approach that worked in its favor in a movie like Secret Life of Pets, but here they stick out like a sore thumb. All the wolves are top-heavy and just look ridiculous when they run on all fours. I also had this same problem with Alpha and Omega six years ago (funny how they’re both movies about wolves), but the hair is really off-putting. Most of the wolves have pretty much anime hairstyles which just look distracting and out of place. This is really noticeable on a character like Bianca who basically looks like a human chick that just so happens to be cosplaying as a wolf. With the sheep this gets even more bizarre, as there are sheep who clearly look like anthropomorphized sheep, standing right next to sheep that have more human-like features that are kind of distracting, NEXT to other sheep who just look like they’re a human and sheep that probably fused together like in The Fly. Again, it’s highly distracting because they’re not anthropomorphic like the characters from Sing or Zootopia, and yet they’re also not animal enough to be like the animals from The Secret Life of Pets or even The Wild Life. It’s like they’re stuck in this strange uncanny valley of anthropomorphism and it’s kind of off-putting to watch. Mami is the only one who manages to make this work, though it probably helps that she’s hardly in the movie. Grey looks alright by all standards, except for his dumb Emo Peter Parker haircut.

From what I’m sure you can gather I’ve said about the story, it’s pretty much also copied and pasted from… anywhere else. It combines traits of Shrek 2, Brother Bear, The Lion King, too many romantic comedies to count, Kung Fu Panda 3, Shark Tale (another disaster full of clichés and off-putting character design)- it borrows so liberally from other movies that it even borrows their flaws as well. Shark Tale needs no explanation, it has the dopey character who is in love but cannot spit it out because God help him “he’s just awkward” (oh please), it also borrows a problem unique to a movie I reviewed not too long ago, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer: The Movie, in which it is full of really annoying cartoony sound effects that get really, really fast. By the way, I said this movie ripped off The Lion King (why on Earth do we have TWO animated movies that came out in 2016 that thought this was a good idea?) and it does so in the Magra’s death scene. Ragear shoves him off the cliff in a way that’s not too dissimilar to Scar throwing Mufasa into the wildebeests. It doesn’t help that both just so happen to have a character voiced by Jim Cummings, which makes the resemblance even more obvious.

Though speaking of terrible sounds, the voice acting isn’t that great. I mean sure, you have people like Jim Cummings who would sound awesome if they even just read the phonebook, but much like Morgan Freeman in Ben-Hur, he’s not doing anything new. Tom Felton… I have NO idea what the hell he’s doing, it’s like he’s trying to sound American and fail horribly at it, but he’s at least trying. Ruby Rose just straight up did not care about this movie at all, she could not sound any more disinterested if she tried, which isn’t only a serious problem because it just sounds bad it also makes her character come across as really uncaring and self-centered, which becomes a MAJOR problem thanks to one particular scene from the movie that I’ll get to. Believe me, I will. Still, this is pretty bad- it’s almost as if the voice actors weren’t allowed to be given a second take or something like that.

But what’s even worse than the voice acting is the score. I’ve complimented good scores before and lambasted bad ones like Accidental Love, for example. It had a score that was highly annoying, bouncy, and would never shut up. It was trying to be a “whacky, silly” score that instead of trying to get you to laugh it only made you cringe. So yes, an overly-goofy score is one issue but thanks to this movie the opposite is also true. This movie has a score that is far more surprisingly dramatic and intense than you would think which gives me the impression that this movie is really trying to get me to take it seriously… and this is the same movie that has a Rocky-style montage of a character trying to give themselves a concussion. AND FAILING AT IT. Sure, that’s meant to be the joke, but this is much less justifiable in countless scenes of something dramatic happening only for it to get cut-off by some awkwardly-inserted comic relief. Oh God, it’s like Epic all over again.

The absolute worst part about this movie is the characters. I’m not going to spend much time on them because I could write an entire essay on just what’s wrong with this cast, and this review is getting really long as it is. So I’ll say this, they vary from being really stupid, to being really annoying, to all-around unpleasant. Grey is kind of a goofball, but other than that he’s just your generic main character and he’s one of the better characters. His best friend sheep who is lovestruck cannot say a word to her about his feelings to save his life, which is not just an awful cliché in and of itself, but his voice is really annoying and her never shuts up. The big bad Ragear is clumsy and gets beaten up a lot, so it’s pretty much impossible to take him seriously as a credible threat and the only time he succeeds at anything it’s simply because the plot just felt like it needed to keep going. Lyra is your generic “nice girl” type who pretty much has no personality aside from, well, being nice, except for one particular scene where she chews out Grey for giving her little brother, Shia, the influence to have him run off from the sheep village to fight off wolves himself, and this happened AFTER Grey saves his life as well as a scene in the movie where she scolds her little brother for being an irresponsible little shit who doesn’t listen to anybody. And Shia, oh I despise him. Not only does he have a really annoying voice and attitude, he’s one of those characters that should have died far sooner than he does (which is never- spoiler alert) because he does anything BUT listen to someone who’s trying to do nothing but HELP HIM. He’s by far one of the most irritating characters I’ve seen in any movie this year- he’s up there with Steel from Max Steel, The Enchantress from Suicide Squad, the Colleens from Yoga Hosers, and pretty much EVERYONE in Collateral Beauty- and it doesn’t help that he gives a really awful message at the end of the movie which pretty much amounts to him saying that you shouldn’t kill someone because it will make you just as bad as they are, which is normally a message that has a lot of weight to it, but when the person who is trying to kill you is DOING EVERYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO TRY AND EAT YOU, and you fight back in self-defense!

I also mentioned Bianca, and out of all of the bad animated movies with forced-in love interests she’s by far the worst. Now, she’s at least thankfully not forced into a relationship with Grey (they already have one at the start of the movie) and the way his little problem is resolved isn’t by true love (but it’s not less dumb). The reason why I hate Bianca the most is because of one particular scene where she pretty much ACCUSES GREY OF CAUSING RAGEAR FROM KILLING MAGRA AND MAKING HIM THE NEW LEADER, and all because he was trying to change himself to prove to her that he’s not an immature clown. It’s somehow all HIS fault, and at no point does she ever get called out on being a colossal bitch. Though Grey DOES call out the sheep for being whiny, pathetic, and annoying, it doesn’t really leave a very satisfying impact when it’s ruined by the scenes that precede and follow it. I HATE EVERYONE IN THIS MOVIE. This movie was just like Collateral Beauty all over again- I really thought I was going to be in for something bland, but not THIS annoying and unpleasant. I really hate this movie, thanks to its combination of terrible tonal shifts, bland story, irredeemable cast of characters, and ho-hum voice acting. It’s easy to see why this movie never made it to the States. (2,541 words. Can't believe this one took me almost a week to write, but I needed to get my thoughts collected so I could express just what the hell was wrong with this movie.)

This is a really foul movie. I don't really get this kind of enjoyment out of something that fills me with dread and hatred- I would much rather be talking about things I really love, like Zootopia, but this is the kind of movie that is not only so bad that it's wasted your time, but it'll ruin your day!

Yes, I give this movie a 2. And how appropriate because now I can make more room for my best big project. That's right guys, The Wall #50 is going to be... THE TOP 10 WORST MOVIES OF 2016 I'll see you all there.

[aegyo-beauty]

Ｍｙ Ｃｕｒｒｅｎｔ Ｓｋｉｎｃａｒｅ Ｒｏｕｔｉｎｅ (012017)

Hello, Lovely!

5th blog post YAY! Again I would love to thank everyone who had liked my Innisfree no sebum mineral powder blog, 100 likes and counting. I'm so amazed at the amount of attention I've been getting I'm very grateful, I've had some lovely conversations with some friends here on Amino I'm just amazed at how lovely everyone's been so THANK YOU 🍑

I thought I should let my friends (all of you) know about my personal skin care routine! DISCLAIMER: I am by no means a skin care expert, I do whats been working for me, it may not work for you but it does work for me. At the moment I'm still testing things out, I mean I'm still using a westerner eye cream and I am in hope to find an amazing Korean one! So if you have any recommendations please let me know and they will go on my wishlist, Thank you in advance!

Okay, let's get started!

Ｂａｃｋｇｒｏｕｎｄ Ｉｎｆｏ:

I do wear makeup nearly every day as I'm working or I'm at school. I love makeup and feel the need to do it every day (don't judge I do it for me, not for anyone else, I enjoy 'painting' my face). But I do have to say after a long day I'm hyped to take it all off, best feeling every.

Just info on my skin type too, I have an oily T-zone (nose, cheeks forehead and chin) cheeks and the surrounding of my face is dry too. I have past acne scarring, which has faded and not a big problem. I have small pore which I treat every week with a mask, I don't do any nose pore strips nor do I use that tool that brings the sebum out, I just leave it. I do suffer from acne ( I'm only 17, I'm a teen so I'm not threatened by pimples, I'm still young!) which I never pop my pimples, I leave them to do it thing and I have somewhat sensitive skin, like super sensitive to acidic masks (*caugh lemon).

01.Ｂｅａｕｔｙ ｗａｔｅｒ

I first start off with a Beauty water, taking my eye makeup off first, ensuring everything off. I know this is a westerner brand, in all honesty, this was like my first 'skincare' product I ever got, I've been using it for the last 3 years! 

Product: Simple Kind to skin micellar cleansing water.

How: I usually put some of the water on a cotton pad and softly wipe my eye makeup off, ensuring that everything is taken off before going on to the next step.

02.Ｏｉｌ Ｃｌｅａｎｓｅｒ

Secondly, I use an oil cleanser, I always use a water-based cleanser around my eyes as oil cleaners seem to make my eyes foggy (?) and I hate that. Everyone knows this brand, I personally like it. The oil does get my foundation off my face while not being harsh which is a benefit!

Product: Banila co. Clean is zero (original)

How: Using a spatula, I grab about a 10c coin amount and rub it into my face, I usually message it in bringing it down to my neck. I usually do this before I go into the shower so when I'm in I run warm water and wash the oil away, it turns almost milky.

03. Ｗａｔｅｒ Ｂａｓｅｄ Ｃｌｅａｎｓｅｒ

The third step is cleansing all of the oils off, I usually use a foamed based cleanser which I know isn't the best to use as foam cleanser can spread germs, but like I mentioned before it works for me and I haven't practically broken out from using a foam. I usually wash my face with a foam cleanser in the shower which is easiest for me. 

Product: Innisfree Green Tea Cleansing Foam

How: Squeeze as small amount of the product (10c coin size) onto wet hands and rub onto a wet face massaging it into the skin ensuring that all of the oils and makeup comes off, wash with warm water. 

Ｒｅｃｏｍｍｅｎｄａｔｉｏｎｓ

Another great foam cleanser is the Innisfree Jeju Volcanic Pore Cleansing Foam!

04. Ｅｘｆｏｌｉａｔｉｏｎ

I usually exfoliate about twice to three times a week. It really comes down to how I feel, if I've worn thick makeup that day or I feel the need to exfoliate, I never do this too hard just enough to ensure that I've softly scrubbed the dead skin away.

Apologies for the dirty packaging its been in my shower, where I usually keep it as I do most of my cleansers!

Product: Skinfood Black Sugar Perfect Essential Scrub X2

How: I usually (as mentioned) do this in the shower, so I grab a small amount and water it down a little bit before i softly scrub over my face washing the srub off after scrubbing my face for 50 seconds to a minute. 

Ａｎｏｔｈｅｒ Ｅｘｆｏｌｉａｔｉｏｎ Ｍｅｔｈｏｄ

Now and again i change it up and use a peeling gel, which i feel can provide better results, i defently see and feel the difrence afterwards.

Product: Holika Holika Lazy & Easy Egg Smoothing Egg Peeling Gel

How: Squeeze a small amount onto hand and rub into face and watch how your dead skin forms into little balls, wash away with warmish water.

How cute is this, I love Gudetama!

05.Ｔｏｎｅｒｓ

I actually love toners, they have actually help with my past acne scarring and seem to balance my skin's redness! Plus toners make your skin feel as soft as a babies bottom. 

Product: Skinfood Black Sugar Perfect First Serum in Light

How: I usually shake some into my hand then I pat it into my face and neck. If I'm feeling fancy I'll pour some onto a cotton pad and swipe all over my face and neck. 

06.Ｓｅｒｕｍｓ

I actually just started using serums as I was kind of lost as to what they do, but honey can I tell you I'm so happy I tried it. My acnes has healed up a tonne (still have some left but it's fading which is positive) and my pores seem to be smalleer (not that they were big, to begin with). My skin legit drinks this in, i love it!

Product: Innisfree Green Tea Seed Serum

How: Like the toner, i pump two pumps into my hand and dab (please don't) into my face and neck.

07.Ｅｙｅ Ｃｒｅａｍｓ

Eh, I I'm sorry I don't have any Korean products to show you but this is what I've been using for the last 5 months, I'm looking for a Korean eye cream so if you have any recommendations I'll be highly grateful.

I know I'm young (17) but I still hope to keep my under eyes hydrated, that's all. I don't care about bags or darkness I just hope for them to be nice and hydrated.

Product: Olay Anti-Ageing Eye Cream 

How: I lightly dip my finger into the cream and light tap it around my eyes bringing it onto my lids.

08. Ｍｏｉｓｔｕｒｉｓｅｒ

I've had a hard time trying to find the one (not that I've had a massive look around) and I've just started using this again, I say again because I started using it about 1 -2 months ago and I started to break out. I want sure if it was something else (as I was trying other things) or it was this product. Well, I confirm that this wasn't the problem. I've been using it the last 3 - 4 days and I haven't broken out and it seems to do the job, not sure if it's going to be great in winter. It's summer where I am right now...prays. 

Moisturisers I've been using for 2 years or so, I was so bad with my skin before. Definitely, notice the different in just hydrating my face!

Product: Etude House Moistful Collagen Cream 

How: I spoon a little on my hand (clean) and dot it around my face then I rub it in (not too hard) and round my face bringing it down to my neck. 

ＥＸＴＲＡＳ

This section is just other things I do now and again, spot treatments, mask, sleeping mask etc.

Ｓｐｏｔ Ｔｒｅａｔｍｅｎｔ

I usually use two things, I know one of them is a little harsh but for me, it works and it doesn't leave scarring.

Product: Thursday Plantation Tea Tree Oil Antiseptic

How: I usually put some tea tree oil on a q-tip then apply to the risen pimple before bed, in the morning I make sure to wash my face.

Product: Nexcare Blemish Clear Cover

How: Peel off a sticker and place over a pimple, let that stay one overnight and in the morning peel it off, carefully. You can actually see all the junk come out off onto the sticker, ew!

Ｓｈｅｅｔ Ｍａｓｋｓ

Sheet mask does wonders to the skin, you can get all different types brightening, moister, pore tightening etc. I usually use mask 2 - 3 times a week depending on how my skins feeling and looking. 

I've been using sheet masks for the last 1-2 years, these were the first skincare items I had even before moisturisers. I use to get mine from The Face Shop, the only Korean place in my city. I love them so much.

Product: Olive Young X DreamWorks Sheet masks (Fav: Kung Fu Panda)

How: After toning your face place one of these onto your face and leave for 20-30 minutes afterwards pat what's left into your skin. 

Ｏｔｈｅｒｓ:

-Innisfree Rose, Strawberry and Honey Mask

-Etude house Hydraulic and Snail Mask

-Too cool for school Egg Cream Mask

-The Face Shop Mung Bean Mask

-Nature Republic Snail Mask

Ｃｌａｙ Ｍａｓｋ

I do switch between sheet and clay mask every week, for me sheet masks are something that quicker and easier and clay mask are something I use when I'm not busy and have time to sit down. 

These masks are popular and everyone knows them, I personally love these two the most out of clay mask that I've tried. 

Product: Innisfree Jeju Volcanic Pore Clay Mask 

How: I use the little spatula (that was in my ELIZAVECCA Carbonated mask review) and put a good amount into my hand then I spread it onto my face and leave it for 30-35 minutes. Afterwards, i wash it off with warm water and pat my face dry. 

Product: Elizavecca Milky Piggy Carbonated Bubble Clay Mask 

How: Using a spatula I spread onto my face and let it bubble for 5 minutes, then I wet my hand a message my face for 2 minutes, washing it off with warm water.

I have a review on it if your interested if I remember ill leave the link here (*)

Ｓｌｅｅｐｉｎｇ Ｍａｓｋｓ

Now and again when five had a busy day and haven't had the time to put a sheet mask or clay mask on, then ill stick with a sleeping mask. These are great for something quick to use.

Product: Laneige Water Sleeping Maks

How: Apply a thin amount on your face before bed. When you have awoken wash this off with the little bit of water and notice how squishy your face is. 

Product: Too cool for school Pumpkin Sleeping Pack

How: Apply a thin amount on your face before bed. When you have awoken wash this off with the little bit of water and see the brightening effects. 

Ｒａｎｄｏｍ

I got this as a freebie in Beyond and have been using it the past month, it's just a simple body moisturiser but it's so good, smells great too! 

Product: Beyond Deep Moisture Body Emulsion

How: Put an appropriate amount into hand then spread over wanted dry area on the body, it's not oily so it's okay for wearing during the daytime !

Thank you for reading this very long post, I hope this was somewhat informative!

Thank you for your support again x

Till next time, Peach out 🍑

[dreamguardian]

Monochrome

Title: Monochrome

Word count: 890

Trigger warning(s): N/A, at least nothing that I can think of?

Summary: No longer could Phantom be called Raphaëlle, though there might have been tiny bits of her former self left in her.

“Did you know her?” Phantom asked. “I mean- me? This Raphaëlle girl… Whoever I was before all of this, did you know her?”

Amélie bit her lip as she lowered her head to stare at the floor tiles. She remained silent for a bit.

“I did.” she finally declared, tilting her head back up to meet what she’d been trying to avoid: Phantom’s cold stare.

“Then…who was she to you?”

She dropped the question without a single hint of emotion in her voice. As she processed it, Amélie felt as if her insides were being twisted around, a knot forming in her stomach. Surely, it would be best to be upfront about this, yet doubt lingered. Phantom had once been Raphaëlle, her beloved daughter, though it was obvious that the child she’d raised was no more, washed away from countless sessions of brainwashing. Phantom didn’t even look like her daughter…at this point, she was basically having a conversation with an entirely different person – if you could even call Phantom a person. She remained hesitant to answer the question, wondering what Phantom would do with this newfound information. And though the question surely felt personal – invasive, even, she deserved every right to anything that could help her put tiny pieces of her past back together.

“Raphaëlle was my daughter.”

“I see… It must’ve been hard to lose her, then.” Phantom’s words were compassionate, but Amélie did not fail to notice that same lack of feeling that lingered within the assassin’s every word, as if every remark of hers had been a pre-recorded message.

“Indeed.”

“And instead of getting her back you got…” Phantom designated herself with a motion of her hand. “Whatever that is.”

Phantom glanced out the window by the side of her bed.

“What was even the point in saving me? I wonder…” she placed a hand on her chest, where underneath her shirt remained the scar left from her attempt to bring an end to her life.

Amélie opened her mouth, but Phantom stopped her before she had the time to produce an answer.

“Rhetorical question.”

Phantom looked back at Amélie, than at the stuffed toy sitting on the nightstand. She grabbed it, inspecting the panda bear as she stroked its fur. By the looks of it, it certainly hadn’t been bought recently as some sort of “get well soon�� gift or anything along those lines. Though it smelled fresh, someone likely went through the trouble of washing it recently, the bear had clearly been played with and tossed around a lot, maybe it had even found its way into an animal’s mouth – a dog, quite possibly. One of its ears had been ripped off and sewn back on using a red thread, the colour being what had attracted Phantom’s attention to this particular detail.

“This belonged to her, didn’t it?”

“It was her favourite toy.” Amélie said, grabbing the panda from Phantom’s hands. “Her first doudou, actually. She named it Dānsè and couldn’t sleep without it; never let go of it since the day she was born, until…”

She felt tears coming up to her eyes, suddenly remembering the night Raphaëlle ran away from the hospital. It was just before the girl was due to be released, and when she and Lena had come to pick her up the following morning, ready to bring her home after being deprived of her presence for months, they’d found her room – a plain hospital room very much like the one they sat in in this moment – packed with police officers and hospital staff. On the floor laid the stuffed panda, and their daughter was nowhere to be found. She had vanished once more, as abruptly as she had resurfaced a few days prior.

Years later, Overwatch agents first encountered the dreaded Talon operative only known as “Phantom.” No one expected them to be nothing but a child, and some had learned not to underestimate or show mercy to the mysterious assassin in virtue of their age. But nothing could have prepared them for what was hiding behind the mask.

And when the mask finally fell, when the truth came out, it felt as if the world just turned upside down. Phantom was nothing more than a soulless killer, a puppet on which Talon pulled the strings. Yet this killer had Raphaëlle’s face, and that couldn’t be ignored-

“Why Dānsè?” another question on Phantom’s part caused Amélie to snap out of her thought process.

“Oh that’s because- I think it means “monochrome” in Chinese.”

Phantom nodded, apparently satisfied by the explanation – though Amélie couldn’t be quite sure due to the blue-skinned girl’s limited ability to express feelings. A quick look at the clock on the wall notified the woman that time had flown by faster than she thought and that she probably should get going. She bit farewell to Phantom, and headed for the door. She was about to open it and walk out, Phantom called out to her.

“Wait.” She said. “…Do you mind if I keep the panda?”

Only now did Amélie realize she was still squeezing Dānsè in her left hand.

“Oh, not at all.” she replied, stepping back towards the bed where Phantom was sitting and handed her the toy. “Take good care of it.”

Maybe there were still bits of Raphaëlle hiding within Phantom, after all.

Author’s note

Here’s kind of an apology for all the Phantom angst.

Also, doudou is a French term often used to refer to a comfort item such as a stuffed toy or a blanket.

[boobachu]

Why 100 reasons not to kill youself is bullshit

I’m in a bad mood and I’m bored out of my skull so I’m gonna fill out answers to that post going around

1. We would miss you. Who’s we? I left the internet a week and no one noticed.

2. It’s not worth the regret. Either by yourself if you failed or just simply left scars, or the regret everyone else feels by not doing enough to help you. Okay this is kinda true, the main reason I haven’t blown my brains out yet is fear of screwing it up and becoming a vegetable.

3. It does get better. Believe it or not it will eventually get better. Sometimes you have to go through the storm to get to the rainbow. No it doesn’t! Well, technically it gets better enough for you to feel pain when it gets worse than it ever was,

4. There’s so much you would miss out on doing. I’m dead! I can’t miss shit when my brain isn’t on!

5. There is always a reason to live. It might not be clear right now, but it is always there. This isn’t even a reason, five and you’re already stuffing this full of bullshit.

6. So many people care, and it would hurt them if you hurt yourself. Literally I can’t remember the last time someone told me “hi” or “Hey wanna do something?” No one cares I exist and nothing I can do will change that.

7. You ARE worth it. Don’t let anyone, especially yourself, tell you otherwise. Why?

8. You are amazing. Yeah that must be why I can’t get a home or even cook.

9. A time will come, once you’ve battled the toughest times of your life and are in ease once again, where you will be so glad that you decided to keep on living. You will emerge stronger from this all, and won’t regret your choice to carry on with life. Because things always get better. Well it’s been 25 years... nope, never happening. I’m only getting worse and worse.

10. What about all the things you’ve always wanted to do? What about the things you’ve planned, but never got around to doing? You can’t do them when you’re dead. I CAN’T DO THEM WHEN ALIVE EITHER!

11. I love you. Even if only one person loves you, that’s still a reason to stay alive. You can’t love strangers.

12. You won’t be able to listen to music if you die. So?

13. Killing yourself is never worth it. You’ll hurt both yourself and all the people you care about. Okay good?

14. There are so many people that would miss you, including me. I literally don’t know OP. This is why suicide prevention is total bullshit. No one actually cares about you, they care about making themselves feel better through platitudes.

15. You’re preventing a future generation, YOUR KIDS, from even being born. I’M STERILE

16. How do you think your family would feel? Would it improve their lives if you died? If they’d care, they’d have actually shown even a little bit of empathy.

17. You’re gorgeous, amazing, and to someone you are perfect. Bullshit.

18. Think about your favorite music artist, you’ll never hear their voice again… Who cares?!

19. You’ll never have the feeling of walking into a warm building on a cold day That’s literally the worst feeling, you have to take off all your clothes cuz it’s suddenly hot as hell and then you have to put on the jacket to leave and ugh it’s the worst. 20. Listening to incredibly loud music Who cares? 21. Being alive is just really good. It’s literally not.

22. Not being alive is really bad. You’re not even trying, you’re just filling bullshit to hit that 100 quota.

23. Finding your soulmate. SOULMATES AREN’T REAL 24. Red pandas Ew

25. Going to diners at three in the morning. Diners don’t exist! Where are these diners? I live in fucking Texas!

26. Really soft pillows. In the coffin. 27. Eating pizza in New York City. I’M POOR 28. Proving people wrong with your success. That dream died a decade ago.

29. Watching the jerks that doubted you fail at life. Literally all the jerks I know are mega successes. Hell look at ProJared, Jontron, Pewdiepie! This world rewards being the worst!

30. Seeing someone trip over a garbage can. Meh 31. Being able to help other people. No one needs my help, they have others.

32. Bonfires. scare me. 33. Sitting on rooftops. SCARE ME

34. Seeing every single country in the world. No way jose. 35. Going on roadtrips. I’ve already done that, now I’m poor.

36. You might win the lottery someday. Yeah that’s stable. 37. Listening to music on a record player. Who cares?

38. Going to the top of the Eiffel Tower. I’M SCARED OF HEIGHTS STOP 39. Taking really cool pictures. WHO CARES

40. Literally meeting thousands of new people. Who don’t give a shit about me, next! 41. Hearing crazy stories. Who cares? 42. Telling crazy stories. No one cares.

43. Eating ice cream on a hot day. This really doesn’t seem worth it. 44. More Harry Potter books could come out, you never know. So murder-suicide JK Roling.

45. Traveling to another planet someday. No way 46. Having an underwater house. NO

47. Randomly running into your hero on the street. I have no hero. 48. Having your own room at a fancy hotel. WHo cares? 49. Trampolines. I HATE THEM

50. Think about your favorite movie, you’ll never watch it again. I’M DEAD

51. Think about the feeling of laughing out loud in a public place because your best friend has just sent you an inside joke Yeah, that’ll never happen.

52. Your survival will make the world better, even if it’s for just one person or 20 or 100 or more. It literally doesn’t!

53. People do care. That’s not a reason 54. Treehouses What do they care too? LOL

55. Hanging out with your soul mate in a treehouse Soul mates aren’t real.

55. Snorting when you laugh and not caring who sees I already do that, doesn’t matter.

56. I don’t even know you and I love you. Impossible

57. I don’t even know you and I care about you. More possible but still difficult

58. Because nobody is going to be like you ever, so embrace your uniqueness! Thank God, I’m a horrible person.

59. You won’t be here to experience the first cat world emperor. Big whoop 60. WHAT ABOUT FOOD?! YOU’LL MISS CHOCOLATE AND ALL THE OTHER NOM THINGS! Well I’ll be dead so meh

61. Starbucks. Worst thing ever 62. Hugs. Scare me

63. Stargazing. I’m always scared a spider will exist. 64. You have a purpose, and it’s up to you to find out what it is. My purpose is to die.

65. You’ve changed somebody’s life. So?

66. Now you could change the world. I already did.

67. You will meet the person that’s perfect for you. Nope, I’m too bad of a person. 68. No matter how much or how little, you have your life ahead of you. Actually yeah, the nazis might turn me into soap so it might be better to die now.

69. You have the chance to save somebody’s life. So?

70. If you end your life, you’re stopping yourself from achieving great things. You already said this.

71. Making snow angels. Texas 72. Making snowmen. TEXAS

73. Snowball fights.

TEXAS!!!!

74. Life is what you make of it. Which is why I want to die. 75. Everybody has a talent. Who cares!

76. Laughing until you cry. I can’t cry no matter how much I want to and honestly that’s a big fuel of wanting to die.

77. Having the ability to be sad means you have the ability to be happy. Nope, depression. 78. The world would not be the same if you didn’t exist. The world is always changing.

79. Its possible to turn frowns, upside down You literally just said this.

80. Be yourself, don’t take anyone’s shit, and never let them take you alive. This is literally advocating suicide. Wow you suck at this LOL

81. Heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary. Be your own hero. Poor

82. Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means that you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections. No, it means waking up not wanting to die and having something to look forward to and being able to do what you really really want to.

83. One day your smile will be real. The wind blows waftfully 84. Having a really hot, relaxing bath after a stressful day. I’m too big for my bathtub.

85. Lying on grass and laughing at the clouds. I’m scared of spiders.

86. Getting completely smashed with your best friends. Alcoholism runs in the family and I don’t want that.

87. Eating crazy food. Ew no

88. Staying up all night watching your favorite films with a loved one. No one loves me.

89. Sleeping in all day. Already do that cuz depressed

90. Creating something you’re proud of. If I could, I wouldn’t want to die.

91. You can look back on yourself 70 years later and being proud you didn’t commit I’m pretty certain I’d die of famine by then.

92. Being able to meet your Internet friends. I’m literally terrified of meeting them. 93. Tea / Coffee / Hot Chocolate Who cares

94. Sherlock season three. This is literally advocating for suicide, wow you’re bad at this! 95. Cuddling under the stars. You already mentioned this.

96. Being stupid in public because you just can. Wow that’s really worth living for 9__9

97. If you are reading this then you are alive! Is there any more reason to smile? No, there’s literally no reason to smile because my future is blighted.

98. being able to hug that one person you haven't seen in years I’m scared of hugging.

99. People care enough about you and your future to come up with 100 reasons for you not to do this. You literally didn’t!

Many of these are just repeats and almost all of it is nonsense!

Like if I could enjoy any of this shit, then I wouldn’t want to die in the first place!!

Either that or your “reasons” were horrible awful things I’d never want to do.

Deadinparadice, you suck.

100. But, the final and most important one is, just, being able to experience life. Because even if your life doesn’t seem so great right now, literally anything could happen You mentioned this many times.

Well that was a shitload of fuck, what were they thinking?!

You wanna know real reasons not to kill yourself?

A) If you fuck up it’s going to hurt like hell

B) If you don’t die because you fucked up or if some asshole saves you, there’s always going to be something wrong with you

Whether it’s colorblindness, mental hiccups, or being a fucking vegetable, the lights are on but nobody home

C) It’s scary

Otherwise, suicide happens when you have no place in the world, when your depression gets so bad, and it ALWAYS gets that bad eventually, that you can’t take it anymore.

Like, if other people can take these platitudes and feel better, more power to ya, but all this shit just feels like being mocked.

Like it’s sooooo easy to want to live.

As though life is going to be wonderful always.

There’s literally a genocide going on along with a massive extinction event, and all the fascists, authoritrians they all got nukes so one day it could all end.

There’s nothing to look forward to.

On top of that more and more it feels like I have no place anywhere in this world.

If I were braver I’d take the shotgun and end it, but I fear pain so much I’m scared of running cuz I might trip and skid my knees.

Life is nothing but misery.