#ALSOOO that 1 thing where its like

[soliddaddy96]

oh im so emo

[boygirlctommy]

saw the new alien movie! it was. um. well. there certainly was an alien in it

[nomaishuttle]

omg also im soo mad i e been listening to rhis worldbuilding podcast at work and it was giving me lots of ideas but i had to turn it off bc i took like..an hour on a room bc i was so focused on jt and my beautiful world.. and i forgot all the ideas i had 😭😭 all i can remember is my fairy thing and that isnt even a from today thoufht

[cchallucination]

Just a stupid ramble

I don't care what ANYONE says, Drew totally has some sort of cursh on Jake; Henry and Liam know abt it too. You might think: but he's dating Zoey, he can't be gay. (Well he was dating Zoey lmao, they broke up in the most recent episode)

BUT NO.

Being closeted is a thing. There's a chance that he's gay and just has some internalized homophobia, so he dates Zoey as a way to 'prove' he's straight. Also, throughout the series it is shown how shallow this relationship is, and just how little they seem to like each other. And Zoey is literally a gold digger and cheating on him sooo…… ALSO IN EPISODE 6, when Jake sees him in the mall and goes to hide from him, DREW LOOKS SO UNHAPPY, PROB CUZ JAKE "COULDNT" COME

Okay now that that's out of the way…. Even if he was gay, Jake is just his best friend, how would you think he has a crush on him?

PERFECT EXPLANATION FOR THIS.

In episode 5, in the starting scene in the cafeteria Drew gets annoyed when Jake isn't listening to him. He also acts Jealous over Jake thinking abt the music club, saying, AND I QUOTE "Y'know, I'm starting to wonder if you prefer their company over ours." You can't tell me that isn't showing blatant jealousy over it!!! Then Henry mentions that it makes Drew sound Jealous, and Drew BLUSHES tell's him to shut up, then AGAIN I QUOTE "I'm just saying, you used to care to listen to me." ME. He wasn't talking about him, Liam, and Henry when he said that, just HIMSELF!!! AND THE LOOK HE GIVES JAKE AFTER JUST…IDK IT SCREAMS JEALOUS BOYFRIEND ENERGY. Also then they start discussing how Jake is doing the competition to confess to Daisy, and when Liam is talking to Jake telling him to just confess normally, DREW LOOKED SO SAD. I MAY JUST BE DELUSIONAL BUT HE FR SEEMED SAD ABT IT. Then Jake has to leave cuz he's going to be late for music practice, and Henry (our fav character <333) says, once again I quote, "Don't look so blue, Drew. I know it must be sad to see your boy running off to the music freaks, instead of into your arms" and Drew blushes AGAIN. Alsooo its worth mentioning that Drew is rarely seen smiling. But every time he IS smiling (with maybe ONE exception), he is with Jake!!! ANOTHER THING I FIND THAT REALLY SUPPORTS THIS THEORY. Drew acts supportive towards Jake's crushes, but it seems like he only is when he feels like Jake won't get with them. Like with Daisy!! In episode 1, when Liam tells Jake he should just ask Daisy out already, Jake says he's "waiting for the right moment" (When someone says that u know damn well they ain't doing it) And Drew doesn't think he's actually going to do it, saying, and I quote, "You've been waiting for the 'right moment' for years" if this comment doesn't show you that he clearly doesn't see Jake taking a step to get with Daisy, then idk what else could. But Drew see's that Jake seem's to be taking an interest to Hailey, he doesn't act the same way. Well, at FIRST he does. Once again, I'm using episode 5 to support this lmao, when Jake is distracted during the game, Drew and Liam come up asking why he's making them lose blah blah, he looks over to where Hailey is and pretty much puts two and two together. He teases Jake in the moment, clearly thinking nothing will come of it. But when he sees they are spending more time together, he gets angry over it. Also when Jake says he doesn't like Hailey in this scene, his "Okay" comes off as so angry lmao. Also in episode 9 (the episode that genuinely makes me wanna kms /hj) When Jake is acting all blue, and finds out it's about Daisy, he seems SO annoyed over it. (Though, to be fair, it could be bc he justs wants to spend some time with his friend without him moping abt shit, but still.) When Drew says "Are you singing for Daisy, or for Hailey" He doesn't seem happy about either option fr. When Drew gets reminded of how Jake is singing for Daisy for Hailey specifically, two girls he thinks Jake likes, he has angry outbursts (once again, bro is so jealous) Drew doesn't even bother to mention Zander by name, his anger is clearly just about how close Hailey and Jake have gotten. And what about Daisy? Her and Jake barely ever speak, so Drew isn't nearly as bothered about that.

OKAY. That's all I feel like writing, but there is quite a few more examples throughout tmf that could support this theory!! Just a note, unless Drew has a redemption arc and becomes less judgemental and controlling; this relationship would be toxic, and I understand this. I don't want Drake to become canon (Well if drew has a redemption arc..then maybe I do…) and I don't believe it has any chance of becoming canon, though I really do think that there's a possibilty of Drew liking Jake. Which makes me rlly feel bad for the dude even if he is sort of an asshole :(

[struck-by-the-rain]

was inspired by a few other ppl on here to drop some of the kind of cringy tropey lore I made up about these 2,,, mostly how they met n stuff and how I personally see emm.... im v normal about them I prommy

maintagging this perhaps but it's under the read more so if u dgaf u can just look at the silly picture

ok sooo

they meet completely by accident because This Space Kicker In Particular (who I'm calling SK) gets a try again in space soccer and crash lands outside the karate family residence. he's fine though, probably because he's subject to cartoon physics or something (might rewrite this bit of the lore bc it's kinda goofy but it's the first thing I thought of).

v predictably they start out playing soccer together, like they take a ball to the park or whatever n just having a kick around. but they move on to hanging out in a non-soccer context pretty quickly. i imagine sk's really curious to see what earth is like (it's probably his first time there), like he's filled w whimsy and joy just to go to the cafe n stuff :) joe is meeting him behind seniors back!

sk isn't joes only friend - hes friends w yuka n the wandering samurai n a few others, but i don't know if he's actually close with them? partially because he's busy training, partially because he's quite a reserved person, n to me at least I think he struggles a lot with self-doubt/feeling inadequate for anyone around him (partially as a result of the way he was raised). not to get Angsty on main but I think he ascribes wayyy too much of his self worth on his training... I think he has a tendency to try and isolate himself from others, both physically and emotionally

sk is the opposite (tropey ik lmao) - he's v outgoing, silly n carefree almost to the point where he gets on people's nerves sometimes (he's cowboy sk's "annoying little brother" to me). I don't think he fully gets/realises exactly why joe is v reserved but I think he manages to grow close w him in spite of that... idk how to word it. but I think he's such a ray of sunshine he's able to break through whatever exterior joe has put up for himself (ik how cheesy that sounds but yeah)

ive made a post about this before but joe is v v v affection starved (because Basement) and does a terrible job at hiding it to the point where he just melts over the smallest things. sk meanwhile is suuuuuper physically affectionate so yeah

I haven't worked out exactly when this happens but I think they just kinda fall for each other over time, it takes a while for both of them to realise its mutual tho....

joe alsooo gets flustered veryyyy easily (source: karate man 2 ds superb screen). sk probs picks up on this right away lmao

im thinking sk is out here dropping the most obvious hints... but joe refuses to believe that sk would see him in that way. idk he probs does the wildest mental gymnastics assuming that sk is just being nice or it's like,,, a social norm up on his planet lmfao.

but yeah he eventually works it out too in the end... probably partially because he begins to learn to be a bit more confident in himself over time. i think they get to a point where they both v much know it's mutual but r too awkward to do anything about it/don't wanna mess up their close friendship/are too worried about the logistics/implications of living on other planets n senior. so they don't like acc Say anything or whatever for a while. but it's obvious n only gets worse over time lmfao. see the pic above the cut

blehhh silly thought but I hc sk to be besties with 6switcher who I think gets fed up of his shittt... like hes just like "Oh My God Please Just Tell Him. Like Please".

in my mind palace they end up going to the battle of the bands (joes a huge fan of the rockers but he's never been able to see them live before). and ummm after the concert they end up sitting outside live house ogu watching the stars together,,,, and u kno,,,, they kith.... woaw,,,,, but yeah I think because botb is the 1 time in game they "meet" (if u can even call it that) I thought it would be cute if it's where they end up getting together as a couple :)

hmmm like inconsequential shit unrelated to the main story but they find remix 9 cat as a stray kitten at some point during all of this n joe takes it in... i think I could do a follow up post about what happens next in the lore after botb because this is already mega long but they eventually end up living together on sk's planet and the cat comes w them :)

oh adding this on acc after I posted it, but I think when joe meets sk it's like,,, the first time in his life where he hasn't felt lonely...

[lonestardust]

The funniest thing is that both of those mentions of sleeping in together were before/during a conversation about having kids.

Anyway, I love your takes on justice and the closure it brings, because I've definately seen some things that annoyed me. Some people just skate over the trauma Carlos has after hearing his father being shot in the doorway of his childhood home and in front of his mother. Like that's something that he should just get over and then he'll be happy. And yeah I love TK and I wouldn't know what to do in the situation that they're in either, there's no side to pick or better option to choose here (not that it matters because it's obvious that they're adopting Jonah) but TK definitely could have been more sympathetic. I think the fact that they're definitely getting Jonah makes me more sympathetic towards Carlos, because I know TK will get what he wants here. And I've seen a lot of people saying that Carlos has been putting work first for a year and a half but actually, it was 1 year (if even that because we don't know what happened immediately after the wedding), then they went to counselling, and then they made it obvious that Carlos was putting in a LOT of effort to be more present. In fact, it was explicitly stated on screen.

Sorry for the rant, just sometimes it pisses me off that people think forgive and forget is the only way to go. And Gabriel's murder was about corruption in the police force or whatever, was Carlos just supposed to let that go???

I swear I love TK so much, and really my issue isn't with him here, it's with the people defending the way he went about it the adoption thing by saying that he had every right to act that way because Carlos should have gotten over his trauma by now.

yeah i think that's a parallel here haha also rip to dreams of sleeping in after having a kid

I was actually gathering up my thoughts about it in a post, how it's often dismissed, who carlos is as an individual, his values, his views etc and thus who he is in all of this. which I'm so curious to see how involved the rangers are in murdering Gabriel, how carlos could come full circle to "how could I've been so wrong" but as in the major realization of "I was right about them from the start. I wasn't stuck on my own, i got played and was left alone" (ugh let me see him in full force taking down these motherfuckers with his bare hands!!!!!)

that's my problem with this storyline actually. i don't expect neat reactions during calamities but alsooo the lack of grace from TK was way out of line for it's at a time where it feels like an imperative approach from him about something he has to act on its compelling urgency immediately despite knowing that carlos (no matter how much he'll be shown to have agency in this later) is not ready and especially now. especially in the call scene after. it's like he doesn't recognise carlos, weaponizing what he's going through against him and then going head to head about it.

and maybe that's just my opinion but a lot of this feels like it's on the storytelling this season. (which I understand the shortcomings of a short season etc but) the over reliance on telling and filling the gaps instead of showing did shoot the story in the foot for a storyline that needed more cohesive pattern and concrete evidence to carry itself. like i can't clearly track the after and before results of carlos' effort of being more present because his on screen absence-presence ratio feels normal in terms of having a third party naturally consuming time and effort beyond work and other cases. but we're also being told in the therapy that carlos isn't in fact present as he should be but again we see carlos' absence being about falling asleep during sex after giving TK a thoughtful candlelit dinner, or spending lunch break together but losing himself in his own train of thoughts regarding a case, which isn't borderline. I just wanted to see more clarity here instead of feeling like TK is compromising on how carlos shouldn't be working on the case at all even though that's not the case and TK is so supportive.

that's also why the birthday stuff felt more disjointed because we see carlos giving his all here for TK. and I imagine a scene where it shows carlos excusing himself to take a case related/work call before the guests arrive and TK being alone in the last minute adjustments, would've balanced out things more. but no we've TK's concerns and exasperation over what carlos is doing for the case more than we've see his support, we've seen carlos' presence more than we've seen the absence that we're told happens very often. the choice of narration isn't really presenting a cogent case.

[yourlocalnameless]

ok so I think ima actually explain all my pjmasks gacha remakes so yeah LESSGOO

first up carlyyy!!

-She has headphones as you notice. I added them since I thought "Hey if cartoka wanted to tell Carly something from the other room bro can just talk into bros mic and Carly would hear it" besides that I also think shed listen to music while driving around for fun. (These headphones are also used when Carly and cartoka troll kids in roblox)

-I'd like to think when Carly found out abt race car drivers on earth she saw that for some reason a bunch of them wore scarfs (pretty sure they dominated scarfs its a universal rule that all racers must have atleast 1 scarf at this point) so she stole one for herself (Pop off I guess!!??!!???!)

-the glasses were a gift from octobella for her birthday. (She wears them to sleep too)

-AS YOU CAN SEE SHE HAS AN EYEBROW PEIRCING. YOU CANNOT EVER CONVINCE ME THAT HER CANNON SELF WOULDNT WANT PEIRCINGS. I STAND BY THIS.

-that bandage on her leg is not just for fasion purposes but also protection for a recent injury that she got while driving and accidentally crashing (Cartoka tried getting her to put the damn bandage on but she was kicking, screaming, fighting for her life since she didn't want to put it on. Cartoka was so tired he just tied the bandage over her pants 😭)

And that's it for Carly! If u got any questions for her design just ask

Next up is the icon, the legend, the moment, the queen herself. Octobella 😍😍

-I gave her double ears cuz HELLOOOO she's literally a fish (well she's an octopus but still) HER EARS LOOKING LIKE FINS IS SUCH A VIBE.

-Id like to think she's really crafty (POP OFF QUEEN 🥰🥰😍😍) SO all her clothes are made from stuff she found while searching around in her moat or stuff she stole.

-OK SO U SEE THE BACK PART OF HER HAIR?? My headcannon is she has hydrokenisis!! This is a useful skill when it comes to fighting but alsooo she uses it to make her hair (Or tentacles) to look more fluffy and fuller (MERFOLK BEAUTY HACK FR 🥰🥰😍😍‼️‼️🙏🙏)

-"WHY DOES SHE HAVE LEGS??" Glad u asked. Remember that episode where octobella changed herself into gekko? Yeah I'd like to think she has multiple forms she uses to make her life easier. This is one of them!! This is her half human half octopus form!!

-The stars on her hair?? Dead star fishes 🥰

-that yellow thing on her head?? Coral she kept alive w magic

-the crown??? Thats a necklace she made that she kinda didn't like as a necklace so she's wearing it as a drooping crown.

And that's it for my girl bells!! If u have any questions let me know.

MY NEWEST CREATION GEKKO!! OK LESSGO

-First off the clips in his hair all have a specific reason of being like that

-the sun flower is bc he likes gardening

-the cat one was a gift from catboy

-and the pumpkin is to remind him of the pumpkins he raised that orticia took 🥰

-as a dancer myself (I'm a ballet dancer) we wear legwarmers so our legs don't get cramps AND LOOK AT THAT GEKKO IS ALSO A DANCER SO THAT GIVES ME AN EXCUSE TO ADD LEGWARMERS.

-he got sick of only the color green so he dyed some parts of his hero costume (He kinda regrets it)

He has a hood to cover his identity instead of a mask now!! (This is bc I genuinely start tweaking when I can't give a character eyebags and adding a mask would equal no eyebags so ☠️)

AND THATS IT FOR GEKKO IF U HAVE ANY OTHER QUESTIONS ABT HIS DESIGN ASK AWAYY

[youremyheaven]

Hey, I always end up here for some reason. I actually do have a lot of people I want to ask about but it would take an eternity, but I would like to ask about relationships. I never dated but I did attract the boys I liked, some moments just happened for 1 or more years but I couldn't date them or anything, I don't regret nothing but I do remember them messing bad and it always ends up with me and my dignity, and I choose latter. They do remember and "seem" to like me even after months, as I heard from my friends after I stopped talking to them which I don't what's happening like where was your courtesy before? With such failed attempts in barely seeing them made me question my own taste. If I remember I know they reciprocate the feelings from here and there but they never told me directly, it's like I've to put efforts which I mostly don't and I don't want to assume anything so I just have to move on. I take my time and they end up doing bizzare things so I create some distance. There was a guy who did confess after whole ton of my hardwork but it was such a trashy experience, I didn't settle of course but my goodness never in my life again. I just gave up on this matter overall, let's see what happens next. I want to be a little delusional for a while. Can you talk about V a little bit, I was curious because I relate to him a lot and I thought of it as romantic before but I don't think it's the same now, I don't know what I'm trying to say but you haven't talked about him much either and I wished to hear this from your side? So if you just want to add something? Maybe I'll know myself a little too? Can you also talk about my attraction to such partners and them being weird?

i dont know if i entirely understood what you were trying to say

but basically you attract boys you like but even if they seem to like you, you don't get them to confess or be straight up with you??

IF this is what you meant,

boys who dont tell you they like you are weaklings. a lack of clear communication means they dont like you enough to risk their pride getting bruised. if a guy genuinely likes you, he'll risk it all and be straightforward with you

guys hold back when they have multiple thoughts running through their head and ideally their only thought should be bagging u

what goes on in their heads is none of our business and it doesnt matter. a guy who does not actually be clear with his intentions and does not pursue you is NOT worth your time. leave them in the dust.

idk how young you are but since you say you dont have any experience dating , i feel like saying this, its okay to want to be desired and wanted by others. there is nothing wrong with it. its biological and natural.

so ask yourself if you just wanted a bunch of admirers or if you actually wanted to date these guys

i know it can be really confusing and stressing as well tbh when someone gives you mixed signals but honestly just leave it at that. theyre being shady because THEY have shady intentions. no man with actually good intentions would hesitate to approach you directly my queen<333

idk how useful this is but im someone with a very "a win is a win" mentality lmao in the sense that if i liked someone and they liked me back, thats a win 😌😜

you did hear from your friends that those guys liked you, so likeeee 👀💅🏻

the number of people who like you, who you have mutual liking with etc will always exceed the number of people you actually date bc thats just math

if 10 guys like u and u like them back, u cant date all 10 in one go (or maybe u can but u'd have to figure that one out urself 🤡)

alsooo men being weird is just ://// how a lot of men are. many guys are straight up bizarre ://// dont take that stuff personally

about V (taehyung), he's actually my least favourite BTS member tbh,, idk if its because he's a Revati Moon (atmakaraka) with Mars in Uttara Ashadha amatyakaraka or what but he's always struck me as a guy who was kinda tough to be around. i dont think he's horrible or anything but his Shravana Venus, UA Mercury and Mars, Moon conjunct Ketu,,, its a weird combo,, he himself is a bit offbeat and eccentric but he would expect his partner to be kinda traditional and modest. i just dont like malefic influenced men i guess :///

something about his sweet boy act feels insincere to me. and as someone who has been around manyyyyy Revatis ,, i dont like that ADHD type behaviour they exhibit (im not making fun of anyone who actually suffers from ADHD and nor am i equating a mental condition with a nakshatra, i just dont know how else to describe the way manyyy Mercurials act??? yk all those funny reels and tiktoks about how gen z has a short attention span and communicate in a weird way bc they're chronically online, yeah, thats how a lot of Mercurials act)

a bit of a self-drag but i went to a girls school until i was 15 and had never interacted with a guy my age, after switching to a co-ed school at 16, i had to learn how to deal with guys from scratch. its a whole different world ill tell u. i think atp due to your lack of experiences with dating, you just dont know what to expect and how to deal with it. and thats okayyy,, this is just a part of life and youll figure it out for yourself as you go. dont stress out too much and dont worry about it tbh,, there are 8 billion people on this planet, there has to be a decent guy who will be honest, as well <333

[sketchguk]

Hiii ! this is soulmate anon! IM sooooo excited your posting again???? is this the fic you talked about the last time i sent an ask???? It sounds sooo good!!! I havent't read a lot of Taehyung fics so its more exciting! And how have you been??? I've beeen very busy in april and may, I'm thinking about going back to school for my masters too ... Are you working on your collab too??? Very nice to see you writinggg , the teaser was awesome ! Alsooo I hope our favorite couple gryfinddor soonyoung and his ravenclaw princess are doing well ehe <3333

Soulmate anon, I've missed you !! <3 I'm excited to post again too !!! Don't look at the publish date of my 'recent' fic otherwise I might cry :') !!!! But if you end up reading this Tae fic, you're in for a very wild ride <3

Even though you were busy, I hope you've been doing fulfilling things !! I'm proud of you, and I'm happy to see you in my inbox again 💛 What do you want to study if you get your masters?!! That sounds so exciting !! I'm always a huge advocate for learning and self improvement (even if the education system is inherently fucked up akldjadf). You'll do amazing with whatever you decide to do !

I've been well !!! I mentioned having a new job a few months ago, but it was kinda temporary because I work at a university and the semester finished a few days ago. As for other updates, I saw Yoongi on day 1 of his tour <3 I even saw Tomorrow x Together and Sabrina Carpenter earlier this week. Music is the only thing I will ever splurge on LOL. Now I just want to write for a little bit before I dedicate myself to studying for my teaching certification hhh

The progress on the collab fic is a little slow, but I'm doing my best to work on it. I wanted to post other stories in hopes that sketchguk dot tumblr dot com will have some more exposure before the release of the collab loll. I've been away for so long, so I want others to have a small taste of my writing !!

Soonyoung and mc are happily bickering <3 I actually had a really cute headcanon idea a while ago. My mom told me a story of my grandma who loved to garden. She planted tons of vegetables !! But whenever she dug through the soil, she'd find peanuts, and for the life of her, she could not figure out where they were coming from. It turns out, our neighbor liked to feed the squirrels, and they would plant their nuts in our garden LOL. This is very much soonyoung x mc energy ahaha

[arlecchno]

IM SO GLAD YOURE ALSO LOVING SUMMERS FIC IM LIKE ACTUALLY SO IN LOVE WITH IT (insert me going batshit insane) alsooo do look forward to more stupid banter in the middle of supposedly serious situations , they are the best and there are more . stan mcs little water creations tbh

bleh , honestly all my other writing works are old and i think pretty shitty at this point but i can link you to some if you really want (or i could write you a short story / drabble , i feel like thatd be less embarrassing on my part lmao , lmk if you want that) about my games though ... 1 2 3(WIP) the first two are well over a year old now , plus primarily unedited , so dont mind any possible grammar mistakes or generally terrible story flow (i swear ive gotten better since these 😰) and the third was also created last year (for a school project) , im slooowly chipping away at finishing the code haha ...

I ACTUALLY COMMENT ON MY OWN DOCS AS WELL !!! there arent much of them because .. well i havent wrote much outside of my private dms LOL

i also think it is insanely fun to comment on my own work

aand ive contacted my friends (aka my two and only true loves /p /hj) about the kinnie thing .. and one of them sent me this to fill out

youre not wrong actually haha , am i that easy to read ?

im an ambivert , i dont like seeking out social interaction irl unless its one of my close friends or im just that bored , but i do get really loud / energetic when i am comfortable (i think you can tell that by how much goddamn energy i put into these asks) but my "social battery" still drains relatively fast i cant handle people very well lmao honestly , my and cynos reasoning for making our terrible jokes align a bit , although most people (apart from my irl friends apparently ???) dont find me intimidating , my main motivation when i slip in puns is to get people to laugh at how terrible they are , because im well aware theyre pretty bad (or all my friends just have the same broken sense of humor i do) . but yeah , i guess now theres two people on my genshin kin list now why do i kin both of the artificial humans in the game -

lets play a game where we ask eachother random questions , so its easier to end things off lol , got a window in your room ? if so , rate the view it has !

- jellyfish

yes the summers fic is so good thank you very much for recommending me it 😖🫶

AND YOOO THOSE GAMES ARE CUTE HAHA i liked nel and akira!!! also impressive how you did 2/3 of them in scratch,, i've had very little experience with it from like a few years back when i took a computing class and damn was it hard as hell 😵‍💫😵‍💫 so kudos to you man

glad i'm not the only one who comments on my own fics on docs LMAO and like you said, it's insanely fun!!!

the way that you're technically all of the above in the bingo 😭😭😭 and that drawing is sooo pretty!£8483£!!£! is that you or an oc of yours? (either way i've been eyeing it ever since i started typing here, hehe)

sooo i basically predicted what you're like irl?

i think for the most part it's because i'm a bit similar to you in some sort of ways, i'm only ever close with my closest friends and can get tired by interacting with people sometimes 😞 but the downside is that everyone finds me scary HAHA 😭😭 my friends had told me a bunch of times on how intimidating i look, when i really just have a normal expression on my face... apparently they said i always look like i have murder on my mind 🚶‍♀️

you now have another addition to the kin list, congrats 🤗

GREAT GAME!!! i do have a window in my room but it doesn't really have a great view... i'm currently living in a shitty apartment for the time being and the only thing i see from the window of my room is my neighbour's unit from my apartment complex 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ so i'd probably give it a 3/10 T-T

now, a question for you! what's the most silliest thing that you currently own? (it can be a purchased item, a gift you got, etc)

hope you're having a great day jellyfish ^^

[beesmygod]

All the DC baddies are showing up to give you good recs! I'm not sure if you're interested in different ethnic food at all, but if you head just north of DC on the metro over to Arlington/falls church/Tyson's you can find a huge array of different restaurants. There's tons of Vietnamese, Thai, Bolivian, Salvadoran, Peruvian, Afghan, Indian, etc! You can't go wrong with just looking at the map and choosing a whatever sounds good.

Alsooo, I have like no friends in DC, so if anyone on anon wants to reach out, let me be your friend!!

I LOVE VARIOUS ETHNIC FOODS. actually, is georgia browns still any good and if not, where do i get the good soul food. please. its been so long.

literally every single one of those foods sounds amazing. in particular the best indian food ive ever had was some hole in the wall in dc that i not only cant remember the name of but the only thing i remember about it is that it was 1 room that was just a counter and they had some celeb pics on the wall

[mizugucci]

omg hi……. 🎵

omg hiiii this was so hard... i hope you like this tho! ^^

position: ALL AROUNDER easily!!!! you're good at literally everything but i think your passion would be dancing, choreography, and perhaps even writing lyrics. you'd be directly involved in a lot of the creative design bc you have such a good eye for it. you'd also be one of the older members, but like fake maknae kind of. until you get serious and then people r like wow....

group name: ok bare with me for the explanation but your group name would be astroglia !! all lowercase and if possible in bold letters. astroglia are a collective bunch of star shaped (!) cells in the nervous system (brain and spinal cord specifically) and astroglia help form the physical structure of the brain but also do a LOT of functions for the entire body -- kind of like, saying your whole group is the foundation for the new era of kpop bc every member can do SO MUCH. all rounders indeed!! but ALSO. science is always growing & scientists r always learning, so theres the aspect where you guys never give up on yourselves. you're always learning. there are 5 members bc of the 'star' shape and obviously i chose this partly cuz you’re so smart my god

concept: lets go science concept!!!!!! each comeback is a new type of science, personally my favorite would be the chemistry one where all you do is cause explosions. your fans favorite concept though is the AI creation concept, where you fight against clones of yourselves (see: onf) ALSOOO for a halloween concept ver. you do a modern version of Frankenstein its great! theres just soooo much you can do with the generic 'science' being the overhead concept. a dark/horror concept could be a forensic science concept where u have to solve a grisly murder using your FS skills.... fascinating

debut song: i wasnt sure what 'sounds' go with a science concept so like im a bit lost but its probably very electronic sounding, and idk why but 24k's only you comes to mind for this, especially the chorus and that 'bloop' part lol idk but just know it matches your concept!

fun fact: each of your albums are named after a different scientific discipline! and while your group, astroglia, are in the nervous system (aka the BRAIN), your fans are called atria (a main part of the HEART) bc your fans are your heart!!!!! brb crying. also one of your members decides to go back to uni to study some sort of science bc they were so inspired lol and youre their #1 fan and supporter its so nice. you quiz them on stuff. you do the same thing for your fans, they always tell you about upcoming major exams and u ask them a bunch of questions on vlive to help them study.... truly the best idol

send me a 🎵 and ill create a kpop group with you in it, based on you and/or your blog!!

[twdmusicboxmystery]

damn word count 😒...I think this is why Bethyl is still SOOO much promoted by TWD and it's still so hot in the fandom becuz their story is off of an evergreen love story : BEAUTY AND THE BEAST! Oh btw, I had 1 question, have you seen 11x07 in AMC+ ? How's it? Are there awesome Beth and Bethyl proofs and symbolism in it? Just curious lol. Alsooo, someone was saying that something big would happen in 11x08 ( someone's death I guess?) that's why they didn't release its trailer or something in AMC+

Sorry I'm so behind on my Asks. I've already put out my posts on 11x07, so I hope they answered your questions. I have seen 11x08 and I loved it! Lots of big things happen. Our fandom will be especially pleased where the Daryl/Leah dynamic is concerned. I was pretty much jumping up and down with happiness at what happens.

The only spoilers I'll give (really only spoilers by default) is that no, we don't see Beth. No, Leah doesn't die. And there is one semi-big death, but it's not a mainstream member of TF or anything, so I didn't find it terribly shocking. But I do really like where things end up at the end of 11x08, and I think you all will, too. By the time this gets posted, it will air live in just another day or two, so you won't have long to wait. Xoxo! 🧛‍♂️💞

[kolcheksluver]

I CHEERED!!! So for context Sydney and David are from this fx show called Legion. Its in the xmen universe, Syd can’t be touched cause she’s a body switcher and David is a telepathic telekentic. He had a parasite, another mutant, feeding off of him for yearsss and they js got it out and in s2 he was gone for like a yr cause he was somewhere they don’t really explain but in s2 the parasite ( his name is farouk ) is tryna get his body back cause atm he’s js a conscience. Syd was being manipulated by Farouk towards the end of season two to warp her perception of David cause, even in s1, she has been defending his ass up and down even when he was shady as shit. And then they have a confrontation where Syd holds him at gun point and is generally js acting not like herself and. The vibes js give the end cabin scene.

ALSOOO Lucy Gray’s whole trust thing & Sn*w lying to her about the third person vs David also being secretive as shit towards her and not telling her he crossed the one ( 1 ) boundary he set, nothing physical with future Syd ( this sounds weird with no context ) and even though that one wasn’t TECHNICALLY his fault, he still should have told her.

Back to the confrontation; Syd shoots him but his friend Lenny has a sniper and SOMEHOW manages to shoot the bullet, iirc, knocking them both out and David’s up before she is so he does what any totally sane person does ( /sar ) … suppresses Syd’s memories so she has absolutely no recollection of what Farouk showed David. They get back to this facility they all stay and work at, Division 3, and David’s all like oh after farouk’s trial — cause atp he has his physical body back — we’ll leave and get a nice house on the countryside just us!!! And that with Sn*w and Lucy Gray dipping from d12.

Syd naturally ends up finding out the truth about what David did to her and they put him in this force field cause he actually might end up destroying the world so they’re tryna prevent that but it doesn’t work. And so he’s tweaking inside of it thinking they all betrayed him and are siding with the thing that essentially ruined his life. And Sn*w tweaking when Lucy Gray dips, good for her, and shooting all the mockingjays and shit.

So in conclusion: rip Sydney Barrett you would have loved Lucy Gray🙏🏻and David does not become a dictator but he DOES become a cult leader so

I need someone to ask me about the season two syd and david and snowbaird parallels PLEASE IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE PLEASE GOD SOMEONE ASK ME ABOUT SEASON TWO SYDAVID AND SNOWBAIRD PARALLELS I’LL PULL UP RECEIPTS, PROOF, TIMELINES, SCREENSHOTS, FUCKING EVERYTHING!!!!😭😭

[avnkin]

The Pogues - Chapter 1 // Midsummers

Pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader

Warnings: underage drinking and swearing I think that’s about it

Word count: 2k

Summary: You were a kook, born and raised but when a messy breakup with your boyfriend takes place you find comfort in the people who you’d been taught to despise and keep away from your entire life, the Pogues.

(A/N): the first chapter, yay! i’m so excited for this series i’ve already sort of planned how I want it to go alsooo this is a s l o w b u r n fic or an attempt at one lmao so i’m again just sort of introducing the idea of JJ and the reader getting together,, this isn’t my best work but eh also please don’t be afraid to give me feedback I love hearing from y’all so my inbox is always open, thank you for reading!!<3 (not my gif creds to owner)

series masterlist

The day you’d been dreading had finally come, Midsummers, the event had already begun when you’d just finished getting ready, you subtly admired yourself in the mirror that stood before you. You and Sarah had decided on wearing the same dresses just different colors hers was white and yours was black, your curly hair rested on your shoulders, running all the way down your back, your mom had paid a makeup artist to come to your house and do yours and hers make up a couple of hours ago since she wanted you to look your absolute best tonight.

You sighed running your hands down the dress before moving towards the door your fingers hesitantly hovering above the doorknob, knowing exactly what was awaiting you downstairs, you took a deep breath, straightening your back and fixing your posture since you knew your mother was going to comment on it if you didn’t before opening the door and making your way downstairs.

Standing at the bottom of the steps was your mom who gasped when she saw you and quickly ran over to the dining room table grabbing her camera and capturing every single step as you made your way downstairs. “Mom stop” you laughed the flash momentarily blinding you, she engulfed you into a hug as soon as you got to the last step “I’m sorry sweetie but you look absolutely incredible” she gushed taking one more picture as you turned towards your dad who smiled down at you his eyes glossing over “my little girl” he breathed pulling you into a hug your mom capturing the moment with her camera, “thank you for doing this sweetie, now come on let’s get going, we’re already running a bit late” he smiled putting his arms around you and your mom as you made your way out of the house.

As soon as you arrived you immediately went to look for Sarah ditching your parents who simply waved you off getting used to your antics. When you spotted Sarah in the crowd and she did you, you guys practically ran to each other, “evening madam” you spoke in a fake English accent “may I say you look absolutely dashing tonight” you commented “yes, yes you may” she replied trying her best to sound posh before engulfing you into a hug “that accent was bad” you laughed as you let each other go “It was, I was gonna let it go” she chuckled along with you.

“Come on Mary’s gonna sneak us some ‘adult beverages’” Sarah winked at you, wiggling her eyebrows “exactly what I need right now” you replied following her into the crowd where you both took turns hiding behind Mary as you took countless sips of the alcohol she passed you guys.

A little later in the evening, you felt just a little drunk, but not so much where you couldn’t hide it and keep yourself together. You had managed to steer clear from Rafe most of the night aside from the fact he had to escort you along with the rest of the girls and boys, but you knew your luck was bound to run out at some point.

You and Sarah were currently in the middle of the dance floor jumping and dancing to the music having the time of your lives when Sarah decided to grab your hand in an attempt to spin you in a circle but when you spun halfway you stopped abruptly when you were stood face to face with someone you were not expecting to see tonight.

“JJ?” you questioned furrowing your eyebrows as the blonde boy stared down at you quickly reaching his hand over your shoulder passing Sarah a note “It’s a, uh, it’s from Vlad” he winked at her, you looked over at Sarah who was practically beaming as she grabbed the note out of JJ’s hand “Vlad?” you questioned turning around to face her “I’ll tell you about it later, cover for me!” she yelled as she made her way out of the crowd.

“What the hell” you frowned finding yourself without a dance partner, you turned back around only to see that JJ was still standing there, you had to admit he looked hot in the waiter's outfit he was wearing, his hair brushed back, the white shirt wrapping itself around his muscular arms just right.

“You wanna dance?” the words just kinda fell out of your mouth before you could register what you were saying and who you were talking too. JJ was taken aback by your question but sure enough one of his hands found your waist as the other interlocked with your fingers, gently swaying you around.

“Who’s Vlad” was the first thing you could think of saying as you both stared down at each other “John B” he replied, spinning you around before pulling you back into his chest, you giggled letting your hand rest on his bicep. “You’re a good dancer” you beamed “likewise, princess” he hummed smirking down at you “princess huh? that’s new” you smiled feeling like you were walking on air as JJ’s hands tightened around your waist and yours found their way around his neck.

Your moment was interrupted when Mr. Dunleavy tapped JJ’s shoulder asking for another Dewar’s and Tonic drink, “right away sir” JJ replied waving the old man of turning back to face you, when he did you found yourself taking a better look at his face and you noticed the bruises and the cuts that covered his sun kissed skin “what happened?” you frowned running your fingers lightly over his bruised cheek “that would be the works of your lovely boyfriend” he remarked “ex-boyfriend” you corrected him, he seemed pleased at your response but before he could reply a hand was placed on his shoulder and he was quickly turned around, big surprise it was Rafe.

“I was wondering if you could get me a mai tai my friend” Rafe quipped, this isn’t good you thought eyes connecting with Rafe’s “yeah how about you make that two Pogue” Kelce backed Rafe up. 

“Rafe stop” you interrupted moving so you stood in between him and JJ. “So what Y/N you’re dating Pogues now?” Rafe scoffed eyes burning holes through yours “No, but even if I was its none of your business anymore” you argued crossing your arms over your chest, raising an eyebrow at him.

“You know what gentlemen I’m actually on the clock right now” JJ spoke before Rafe could answer you, placing both his hands on your shoulders lightly pushing you out of the way so he was now facing Rafe “you guys look spiffy” you chuckled at JJ’s words “I actually got a couple of orders ahead of you so why don’t you guys go help yourselves to some hors d’oeuvres” JJ suggested slowly starting to back away from Rafe and Kelce, “hey guys JJ’s gonna serve us some hors d’oeuvres” Rafe called out to the rest of his friends motioning for them to come over “Rafe don’t-” you began but JJ cut you off “I’ll be right back”

“Yeah we're actually gonna follow you just to make sure-” but before Rafe could finish JJ ran into the building Rafe and the rest of his friends following shortly after “shit” you mumbled making your way inside, one against five wasn’t a fair fight and you weren’t about to let your ex-boyfriend beat up JJ just because you asked him to dance with you.

It took some time for you to find them since they’d quickly disappeared out of sight but eventually, you heard familiar voices coming from near the locker rooms “hold him still. What-what do you think? a four iron right?” you heard Rafe’s voice, you panicked knowing you couldn’t stop this on your own “keep his head still I’m gonna line this” shit shit shit you thought “very Rafe of you huh? five on one” JJ could be heard “if you could please stop talking it’s very disrespectful. I’m trying to hit a ball” Rafe’s words quickly snapped you back into action as you did the first thing you could think of and ran to find one of the security guards, as soon as you spotted one you ran up to him “excuse me, sir, there’s something going on in one of the locker rooms” you panted leading him to it.

You pointed him towards the direction of the guys and he quickly walked over “gentlemen” he spoke causing Kelce to let go of the neck hold he’d had JJ in “is there a problem here?” he asked, you walked in shortly after glaring at Rafe who scoffed, quickly putting two and two together, eyes darting between you and the security guard, JJ’s eyes looked up into yours and he smiled “pardon me officer no there’s not an issue I just- actually yes there is an issue uh, we got a criminal trespass in progress here, beep! call it in right, I’m in violation of all kinds of shit sir, but these young gentlemen” JJ breathed out going to fix Kelce’s tie who slapped his hands away “don’t touch my shit” Kelce barked down at him “but these young gentlemen caught me sir and they’re about to take me away. And that’s what you should do escort me out of here” the security guard rolled his eyes grabbing JJ’s arm and dragging him out after him.

“Fix that tie son” JJ teased pointing at Kelce “you’re looking spiffy too. You Powerpuff girls have fun” he waved them off, it was hard to hold in your laughter at his words, your eyes quickly found his and he smiled at you winking just like he’d done in the restaurant the other day. This boy was going to cause some problems in your life you just felt it as you watched him get dragged out by the security guard.

“Real classy Y/N” Rafe scoffed making his towards you “whatever Rafe it wasn’t a fair fight and you know it” you argued turning to walk away but he quickly grabbed you preventing you from moving any further “you just watch yourself alright I don’t want to have to do something I don’t wanna do because you can’t control yourself” Rafe retorted obviously implying that you were sleeping with JJ “you know what fuck you Rafe” you spat stomping away from him and back out into the crowd of people.

You felt relieved once you saw Sarah had returned and you quickly ran towards her, but as you were about to tell her what had happened you were interrupted by by JJ’s voice yelling over the crowd of people “it’s okay everybody! Do not panic. Leave it to the men and women in uniform. Let’s hear it for them” he started clapping as the security guard desperately tried to drag him away “Rose! you look like lady liberty” JJ pointed towards Sarah’s stepmom causing you and her to giggle as you looked over at each other.

“Let go of him!” Kiara suddenly yelled, drawing all attention to her “you can’t just boot him, I invited him here, I’m a member of this club” she stated her parents quickly trying to get her to back down but she ignored them. That’s when JJ took his chance and pushed the security guard away from him making a run towards the exit.

“Hope I’ll be seeing you around Y/N, you look dashing as always” he smiled coming to a halt next to you grabbing your hand and bringing it up to his lips placing a small kiss on top of it, you blushed thanking him as he raised your hand up, spinning you around one more time before he gestured for Pope and Kiara to follow him which they did despite the protest of their parents. You felt a weird feeling of calm wash over you as you watched the three of them run away, John B quickly joining them and JJ saluting you as you both made eye contact one last time.

“We’re screwed” Sarah sighed putting an arm around your shoulder as you both watched the two boys who managed to capture your attention disappear into the night “yes we are”.

tag list: @k-n-e @avashroom @sspidermanss @free-pool-trash @we-are-only-halfway-home93 @k-k0129 @charoum @daygiowvibe @maybebanks @treestarrrrrrrr @whothehellistova @chasefreakinstokes @http-cherries @dolanfivsosxox

strikethrough means Tumblr wouldn’t let me tag you :( If you want to be added to the taglist let me know!! also please notify me if I forgot to tag you. <33

[ttttaehyungie]

sincerely, but no longer yours | chapter 1

sincerely, but no longer yours | ex!kim namjoon x reader

☘  genre | angst, exes au

☘  summary | It started as a coping mechanism as getting the words out provided a form of catharsis. But now you can’t stop writing these love letters, even with the knowledge that they’ll never get sent. After all, who writes love letters to their ex?

☘  word count | 4k

☘  rating | PG-13

☘  warnings | some fairly heavy angst, breakup

☘  a/n | ok SO I’m finally working on a multi-chap for the first time in forever :o and ofc this is the first series that i’m working on in this blog! alsooo am kinda ashamed to admit that i’ve actually NEVER finished a series ever 🙈🙈 sooo this is a challenge from me @ myself 🤭 so yes come along with me for this ride hahahah and pls kick my butt if i leave this series as another one in the unfinished pile

You can have Manhattan, ‘cause I can’t have you -- Sara Bareilles, Manhattan

Pulling your jacket around you a little tighter to keep the bite of the night air at bay and hitching your duffel bag a little higher up your shoulder, you board the bus. The bus conductor asks for your ticket and you let go of it for the first time since you bought it, giving him the flimsy paper that’s now imprinted with the shape of your thumb under the stress of your tight grip as you held onto it like a lifeline. After a quick inspection, he passes it back to you and you take it from him wordlessly.

“Hey.” You look up at the conductor in surprise, gaze finally torn from where it had remained on the ground all this time. “You alright?”

You don’t allow yourself to consider the question lest the tears come and you cause a bigger scene than you already have. With a tight-lipped smile that probably isn’t fooling anyone, you nod at him, and traipse to the back of the bus before he can probe any further.

The comfort of the back corner of the bus brings you the tiniest smidge of relief, especially after you place your duffel bag on the seat next to you, creating a barrier between you and the rest of the bus. Not that there would be many people, if any at all, at such a late timing. Nonetheless, the little bubble created by your makeshift barricade brings you some security as you settle into your chosen seat gingerly, as if you would shatter to pieces if your movements were too rough. Your emotional state sure feels that way, fragile and on the brink of falling apart any time now.

You’re not sure how much time passes before the bus doors finally shut and it begins pulling out of the bay. It carries a sense of finality. You’re really going home. The cityscape, drenched in the black and orange hues of nightfall, goes past as you watch through the window- slowly at first, then becoming a blur as the vehicle picks up in speed. The plans you had for the weekend are now truncated and left behind with the city.

The emptiness hits you once again when the bus pulls onto the freeway and the city sights are completely gone. Only the inky black of the night sky accompanies you now. You are alone. On this bus, yes, but in more ways than that too. You let that fact sink in.

It’s too dangerous to let your thoughts overtake you right now, so you occupy yourself by playing Sudoku puzzles on your phone, which has strategically been placed on airplane mode. The methodical problem-solving that the puzzle requires of you submerges your mind in a sea of numbers. Which is your intention. And before you know it, the bus is slowing down and you look up from your device to the familiar scenery of your hometown. On any other day, it would fill you with warmth, but right now it doesn’t.

Now having arrived at your destination, you gather your belongings and alight from the bus. It’s just a daypack and your duffel bag which is bursting at the seams with how many items you crammed into it. You would have brought a suitcase if you knew, but how were you to predict the events of tonight? Though, you surmise, you should have seen it coming and could have prepared yourself better.

You’re trudging home and you’re maybe ten minutes away when it begins raining. Great. As if this day could get any worse. It makes your clothes stick to you in that cloying way and the chill from the night has you shivering almost violently now. But you plough on home, only focusing on getting one foot in front of the other and repeat, repeat, repeat.

Finally at your front door, it’s a struggle to get the key in the door with how badly your hand is shaking. Whether it’s from the cold or something else, you’re not sure anymore at this point. After countless tries, you finally manage to jam it in and turn it quickly so you can just get into the safety of your home.

The noise that results from the way you throw your duffel bag and daypack down, your rain-soaked jacket quickly following suit to form a messy, wet heap in the middle of the entryway, announces your arrival. Hoseok pops his head out from the archway that leads to the living room, the sounds probably interrupting his late-night Netflix binge.

“____?” You can hear the concern in his voice, and you refuse to look at him, instead focusing on wrenching your sodden shoes off of your tired feet. “Where’s Joonie?”

The mention of his name causes something like a switch to flip in you. Your brain finally, finally catches up with reality, and the numbness you lulled yourself into for the past few hours dissipates just like the pricking of a balloon. It leaves you gasping in pain, the way the emotions suddenly come flooding through you. The hurt viciously demands to be felt.

With a shaky exhale, you look Hoseok in the eye. The gravity of tonight’s events finally cements itself in your brain and the tears you’d been holding back come spilling out uncontrollably as you mumble your next words out brokenly.

“We broke up.”

It’s been weeks since you and Namjoon broke up. The constant cloud of desolation that plagued your every waking moment in the immediate aftermath of the breakup has finally eased up somewhat.

Being a high school senior turned out to be a lifebuoy in some ways, giving you solid things to cling onto in the midst of your emotions of loss and confusion. It’s not healthy, you know, but the academic content provided a sense of constancy that you sorely needed and the rigor of it all kept your mind from wandering too far into the depths of your sorrow.

Yet you knew this could only go on for so long. At some point, these emotions will eat you up from the inside out if not acknowledged and sorted out. Pain is just like that, it will gnaw at you with subtlety but with certainty. Repressing the feelings is just simply unsustainable.

You’re really lucky to have an older brother like Hoseok. That first night, when you finally broke down and let the tears turn into sobs that wracked through your entire being, he’d quickly gathered you up into his arms and had given you a shoulder to cry on. God knows how long you spent in that state bawling seemingly endlessly, but Hoseok had let you just get it all out without asking any questions, the immensity of his patience and quiet strength of his presence lending you a pillar of support that you desperately needed at the time. Later that night, when you were showered and tucked in warm under the covers, you watched through puffy eyes as he unpacked your belongings from your duffel bag and carefully wiped them dry or chucked them into the laundry basket as was appropriate.

When he reached for your daypack, you stopped him. You were barely able to croak out your opposition, your throat raw and wrecked from the earlier barrage of emotions. Still, Hoseok caught it, and nodded empathetically. He respected your wishes for privacy and only wiped the exterior of your daypack down before leaving it in the corner of your room.

And in the corner it remained. Aside from your absolute necessities, which was really just your keys and your wallet, you’d procrastinated unpacking your daypack. Till now, that is.

Not that there was much to unpack anyway. Most of the possessions you’d retrieved from Namjoon’s dorm room that night had been hastily dumped into your duffel bag in the single-minded mission to get out of there as soon as possible. You know exactly what items remain in the daypack- a bottle of water, a pair of shades, some chapstick, surprise tickets you’d bought online to a movie from that fateful weekend that went unused, and an envelope tucked away safely in the inner pocket of the bag.

The daypack and its contents weighed on your mind the same way it sat in the corner of your room- silent, untouched, yet unbudging. It’s plain silly how afraid you’ve been to confront these items, items that are inanimate and void of meaning apart from what you yourself have ascribed to them. In an attempt to hold off the full brunt of your misery, somehow you’d deluded yourself into thinking that leaving the daypack as it is would preserve things as they once were. You lived in self-denial, as if the breakup had not happened. As if the weekend trip just had not taken place at all, and was waiting to happen instead. The daypack was waiting for you to sling it over your shoulders as you head jovially out the door to the city and to the arms of your boyfriend.

But no. You heave out a sigh. Things have changed. You and Namjoon are no longer together. Holding onto a delusion is ridiculous, and you need to move on. And the first step to doing that is to get rid of this centerpiece that your fantasy revolves around.

The items in the bag get dumped onto the carpeted ground of your room unceremoniously as you unzip the daypack, turn it upside down, and shake out the contents. Whatever mystique you’ve built up around these simple items is now shattered as they lay scattered on the floor. The shades and chapstick return to your dressing table, the bottle of water and expired movie tickets get dumped out. And the envelope… you throw it into your desk drawer and slam it shut before the temptation to tear it open overtakes you.

That was the first of many letters that were written, but never got sent.

You never intended to make it a thing. It just… happened one day. Staying focused on school and college applications could only provide so much distraction from the whirling emotions bottled up inside you. No matter how tightly you attempted to keep a lid on it, wistful nostalgia still crept up uninvited.

And naturally so. This neighborhood, your high school, heck even your own house is filled with the ghost of the memory of him. Namjoon had been a significant presence in your life before he was even really yours. You still remember the day Hoseok brought his newfound friend home, Namjoon’s lips pressed tightly together in his attempts to keep his sniffles and tears in, his knees scraped, bruised, and bleeding from what looked like a pretty hard fall on the playground.

“Mum!” Hoseok had called out. “I need band aids!”

“Hello,” Namjoon mumbled when your mum came hurrying out of the kitchen to see what was wrong. “Sorry to be a bother.”

Namjoon had always been a klutz, but it was his clumsiness that had birthed the close friendship between him and Hoseok. After one too many accidents on the playground, Namjoon had been too scared to go home to face the inevitable reprimanding that would come. Hoseok had offered to patch him up at yours instead, and the camaraderie that arose from that incident had sealed their friendship as an unbreakable one. Unfortunately, as big as Hoseok’s heart was, his little seven-year-old hands were not the gentlest. From your spot at the top of the staircase, peering through the grills, you saw how Namjoon winced at Hoseok dabbing antiseptic on his knees, and you came bounding down the steps to rescue the stranger that sat on your family’s sofa and that had somehow wormed his way into a soft spot in your heart with his teary pout.

“Hoseok,” you demanded, your tiny hand outstretched and waiting, voice tinged with petulance. “Give me.”

Hoseok relinquished the first aid items to you and watched as you cleaned his new friend up, your brow furrowed in careful focus, little hands fumbling but your touch delicate. After you applied the twin band aids on both of Namjoon’s knees with all the meticulousness that a five-year-old could muster up, you patted his thigh and smiled at him.

“All done!” you declared. And you’d never forget the sight of his dimpled smile beaming up at you in response.

If only you could. You shake your head, as if it would shake the memories away. The paper before you on your desk remains as blank as it was twenty minutes ago when you sat down to get started on revision. But having known Namjoon for over a decade made it too easy for you to just get swept away by the deluge of memories of him. You tried to keep it in, but it kept leaking out. And perhaps that’s what you need- to just let it out.

The first touch of the pen to paper has you pausing, wondering how you were even supposed to start. But the moment you begin- Dear Namjoon, - everything comes spilling out in prose. Hardly having to pause what with the way your thoughts just keep flooding out onto the paper, the inked words flowing out in streams, you finally let go of the firm grip you’d kept on your feelings up till now and express your frustration, your loss, your confusion all out in one huge cathartic spew. You write till you feel emotionally dry, but in a satisfying way, chest feeling lighter than it had in weeks. But as your ballpoint pen swirls the complimentary closing- Sincerely Yours- you can’t help but laugh at the sardonic humor embedded in it. The sincerity in your words is irrefutable. But you’re no longer his.

Folding it up and sealing it away in an envelope, you chuck the letter into your desk drawer where it joins its predecessor. Now with a clearer mind, and a renewed focus and vigor, you’re finally able to set to work on the mountain of revision materials that await you.

The first letter was a gushing myriad of feelings. But the subsequent letters solidified into one obviously discernible emotion- anger.

Once you came to terms with the fact that he’s not coming back, and that he basically threw away the relationship, it had you boiling mad. How much had you sacrificed for this relationship?! You’d basically shuttled back and forth between your hometown and the city almost every other weekend to visit him on campus, juggling your family and your grades and your friends back home and college applications just to make your long-distance relationship work. And how did he repay your efforts? By withdrawing from you and refusing to talk things out despite your gentle, persistent probing. You’d heard that he’d been in a slump and confused about the future- Hoseok, while his best friend, was your brother after all- but you’d never imagined he’d be confused about you.

And so you took your rage out on paper once again, your words harsh as you wrote candidly. It’s not like he’d ever get to see it anyway.

But anger is tiring. After penning a few letters full of scathing lines you’d never have the guts to actually spit out in person, your wrath was quelled and soon gave way to grief.

In the same way with your anger, you chose not to deny your sadness, but leaned into it instead. The end of your relationship was something worth mourning, you decided, and you let yourself embrace the sorrow fully and deeply. It was especially difficult knowing that he was still in contact with Hoseok, while you had been completely cut out of his life. But you can’t blame either of them- you can’t demand that they revoke their friendship over what happened between you and Namjoon, nor would you ever desire for that to happen. Hoseok, on his part, managed it to the best he could, taking his phone calls in a room separate from you. But you can’t control the wave of dejection that runs through you whenever you spy Namjoon’s name on his caller ID.

You’re used to the routine by now. Whenever the emotions get too overwhelming, whenever there’s just too much that you want to say to him but that you can’t, you engage in the therapeutic act of writing your letters. Then you seal them up, and chuck them away, out of sight and out of mind. The grief gets easier to deal with too, especially with the excitement of receiving college acceptance letters and your high school graduation date that’s drawing closer and closer.

Of course, that in itself brings its own strand of sadness too, as you imagine having to separate from your friends and family and leave your childhood home behind. But the notion of getting to carve out the path to your future leaves a giddy anticipation that overshadows all other feelings.

And in that strange, paradoxical way that time seems to pass in- every hour ticking by so slowly, but the weeks whizzing by in the blink of an eye- it’s just as your five-year-old self had once proclaimed, “All done!”

Your life now packed into boxes that are piled into the car, one last check of your room to ensure that nothing important is left behind, a final look at the place you called home for all your life up to now, and you’re off to college. As you watch the sight of your neighborhood through the rearview mirror pull further and further away till it disappears entirely, you know you’re leaving tons of memories behind. Memories of Namjoon, yes, but also memories of your growing up years with your family and friends who have made you into who you are today, able to venture out and face the world with courage and confidence.

Maybe it’s that experience of individuation that has you finally accepting it. No more whirlpool of emotions, no more anger, no more grief, no more emptiness. Just peace. You’re single, separated from Namjoon. And you’re ready to take on the world and live your life like the boss woman you are.

“____,” Hoseok wails, pouting as he approaches you with outstretched arms. You barrel into him, relishing the warmth of his embrace and stowing it away for the days ahead. His eyes rove over you as he holds you at arms length so he can take you in for the last time in a while. He sighs. “My baby sister is all grown up and going to college and away from me.”

You laugh. “I’m still in the country, Hoseokie, it’s not like I’m halfway across the world. You can come and visit anytime.”

“But you’ve never lived further than a minute’s walk from my room. How am I supposed to deal with you being hours away from me now?”

“You’ll get over it soon, you big baby.” You duck out under his arms and slap his butt with the playful affection that’s always characterized your sibling relationship. Your parents are waiting by the door of your dorm room and you go over to give them their share of goodbye hugs.

“Thank you for all the help with moving and unpacking today,” you say, voice muffled as you speak into your dad’s chest. He strokes your head and you lean into his touch and savor it.

“You’ve got one more box there, you sure you don’t want our help with that?”

“No, it’s fine, I can handle it.”

It gets increasingly hard to hold the tears back and the difficulty only spikes tenfold when you turn to see your mum holding back tears of her own. Her perfume and her own natural scent that lies underneath that that you inhale as you hide your face in her neck while the two of you hug very nearly pushes you over the brink. But you manage. Knowing your family, it’s a given that someone will shed tears at some point, and you’re all (barely) holding it together for each other.

Hoseok comes up to hug you from behind so that you’re now sandwiched between him and your mum, which only prompts your dad to envelop all of you in his arms too.

“If it ever doesn’t work out- not saying that it won’t, because you’re super smart and the most driven kid I’ve ever known- but just, IF ever,” Hoseok rambles into your hair, “you can always come home and teach at the dance studio with me, ok?”

“Thanks Hoseokie. But you know I have two left feet, so I don’t think that’s gonna happen.”

“They’ll make an exception for you. I’ll make them make an exception for you.”

You laugh and extricate yourself from the group hug through a series of wiggles that only provides further proof of why you’ll never make it as a dance instructor the way your brother has.

“Ok, it’s getting late and you guys still have a long drive ahead of you.” You shoo them out of your room. After your final goodbyes, you return to your room quickly, knowing that the sight of their figures leaving would be unbearable.

Needing a distraction, you busy yourself with unpacking your last box of belongings. It’s nothing too difficult- your family had spent the afternoon helping you with the major to-dos like wiping things down and setting up your larger decor and lighting fixtures (read: copious amounts of fairy lights strung everywhere) just the way you liked it. All that remains now are some photos with friends, the few pieces of jewelry you owned, your humble make-up collection... and a shoe box stuffed full of letters that you didn’t dare to leave back at home where it would be at risk of being discovered by prying eyes in your absence.

Finding a place for your various items was a simple task to complete. Within ten minutes you were done unpacking, washed up, and tucked into bed for your first night ever living apart from your family. You roll over onto your side- your sleeping environment may be different, but your side-sleeper habits will never change.

As you peer out the window and take in the campus sights that seem foreign now but that you know will become familiar in time, you’re struck with a funny thought. What a turn of events your life has taken.

This is not the dorm room nor the campus you thought you’d be attending all those months ago when you were making your way down to the city. You’d embarked on that trip in gleeful anticipation at being able to deliver the good news to Namjoon, only to have that trip abruptly cut short, and the news remained in an envelope that never got to its intended recipient.

That weekend triggered a rerouting of your life, setting you on a new path that had brought you here to this campus instead. Not that you regret it, or feel like you settled for something less, not at all. You’re at peace with your decisions. It’s just an intriguing thought that things could have turned out so differently if that one weekend hadn’t happened, is all.

On impulse, you clamber out of bed to retrieve the shoe box that you’d shoved into the corner of your closet. Rifling through the stack- wait, did you really write this many letters?- you finally find the envelope you’re looking for.

Tearing it open gingerly, you pull out the sheets of paper contained within. It’s a rueful kind of feeling that washes over you as you skim over the words that you’d written back in what feels like an entire lifetime ago. The excitement you had felt at the prospect of the long-distance aspect of your relationship finally coming to an end after two long years was blatant in your letter.

But when it became obvious that Namjoon had gotten tired of trying to make things work, what you’d initially thought of as the golden ticket to saving your relationship turned out to be fool’s gold instead. You pull up the second sheet of paper- a photocopy of your acceptance letter to the same college your then boyfriend was attending- and you can’t help the ‘what if’s that fill your mind as you run your thumb over the college emblem.

Guess your dreams of a future where you lived in the city and where Namjoon was still in your life would remain just that- a dream.

Or so your naive college self believed.