#ALSO that thing has so much benefits??? damn. and here i always wondered why my family keeps giving it to me
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I got food now yay yippee!!! My mom woke up and heat up the mami that was actually still in the fridge? I forgot bout that.
#aria rants#also... actually... the milk was Way more of a help than i thought cuz it managed to get rid of wtv else was making my stomach hurt#and im also starting to think that it wasnt the vitamin b complex but the consequences of my actions once again... orz#so like-- i ate braised sweet potato leaves like-- the other day. but i got too excited i think i didnt got to chew it properly o<-< AUGH#ALSO that thing has so much benefits??? damn. and here i always wondered why my family keeps giving it to me#whenever Stuff happens to my body cuz turns out the leaves packed with so much health benefits
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Moon Conjunct Venus + Moon Trine Ascendant Synastry Based on My Personal Experiences 🔞
This may not resonate for everyone, so if it doesn't hit, please let it miss. There are 18+ topics included this so minors, do not interact. 🔞
Their Moon conjunct your Venus
This aspect is wonderful if you're both feeling each other. They can and will read you like a book without even needing to turn the first page. If you've ever seen or been in one of those couples where the one person knew exactly what the other one wanted or needed, without ever discussing it, even once? Yeah, those are the vibes here. You will be loved exactly the way you want to be loved and if things don't work out, there is a good chance the breakup could leave you feeling destroyed for quite some time, even if you were never in a relationship.
This aspect can make it very difficult to be "just friends" with if either person wants more from the connection, but even platonic friends with this synastry aspect will be the kind of friend that you give the spare keys to, can call at 4 in the morning whether for an emergency or just to sob about something stupid, and who you allow to come over without calling first-in fact you welcome it and aren't surprised to come home and find them asleep on the couch or something like that. Like this is the friend that you're more like family with, if you're not in a romantic connection.
If you ever get in a mood and start talking about "everyone this" and "people always/never that," they aren't offended because it doesn't even cross their mind to think they're included in that pile. There is no guarantee that things will always be perfect or work out with this placement, obviously it depends on factors in the whole chart and other things like time, place, circumstance, and so on. And of course, anyone who can read you accurately has the ability to use that to manipulate and harm rather than help and support you, but that's a risk of life in general. All I'm saying is: with this aspect, when it's good, it's DAMN GOOD.
To give you an example, I had this synastry with a Scorpio moon several years ago (I'm a Scorpio Venus). We met at an event and hit it off so well that we were talking outside the venue for nearly 4 hours, annoying his friends and mine. Ended up bringing him home with me and I fully expected him to disappear into a cloud of dust the next day, but he didn't. We didn't end up working out beyond friends with benefits, but he's NEVER been rude or unkind to me once. Extremely patient, always calm no matter what and very sweet to me whenever we run into each other somewhere in the city every couple of years.
The way he handled me emotionally was just beautiful, I can't think of another way to put it. Most of my friends at the time would ignore anything I did creatively - not him, he found one of my books and posted it on his story with a cute caption saying how much he loved intelligence and that he was proud of me. The type to show up in the rain and keep me company when I was sick (back when I lived alone), even though he had class, work and practice all that day. The first time we hooked up, I was getting my laundry together and wondering why he hadn't left yet. He picked up the bags talking about, "Nah I got 'em, lead the way to the laundromat, why would I leave you to do this by yourself."
TMI / TW (mentions of sexual activities, body fluids, menstruation/periods) so again, minors, get out of here and the rest of you proceed with caution or skip to the next paragraph.
He was very much empathetic and also body positive-absolutely nothing seemed to gross him out. I have so many examples, but let's go with something both extreme and spicy. I was bundled up, laying on his shoulder and trying to deal with menstrual cramps while we were watching a show and him going, "Oh you know I read somewhere that orgasms can ease those, may I?" I'm there like, may you what? sure?? I'm curious?? Next thing I know, he's got a towel down, yeets the tampon and dives in head first talking about "a period ain't stop nothing but a sentence." And, well? All I'll say is.. at least ONE man knows where the clit is! ibuprofen, who? where? 😂😈
Obviously that's a bit much if you're a vanilla type (but a Scorpio moon + Scorpio venus? baby we was freaks, what can I say? lmfao) but this is just an example I mention because the important part is not once did he bring up getting off himself. No hinting for a quickie or a BJ like you might expect. I even offered because I was used to guys doing seemingly selfless gestures only to be guilt-tripped shortly after, and he was just like, "Sorry, what? No, you're not feeling well, I wanted you to feel better, plus I don't need to get off all the time, I read it's healthy to ignore the urges sometimes." (Idk if you could tell, but he REALLY likes to read, loll).
That's what I'm talking about with the Moon-Venus conjunction. This kind of synastry will vary in the specific ways it's expressed of course, but all other things being equal, someone with their moon conjunct your venus will intuitively know what you want and need to feel loved, and it works because it blends very well with their own emotional needs. If the moon person tells you they enjoy doing something for you or with you without expecting anything in return, believe it. It sounds like a lie because of the types of people who would lie about that, but with this aspect, chances are they meant that shit.
Not only that, but you'll feel like you've known them for a long time. That's because you'll also understand their emotional expression on an intuitive level. This isn't as one-way as it could sound. Oh, no, not at all. You will feel like you've met before and find yourself making time and space, and finding energy for them even out of thin air. You could live in a tiny studio that you'd never share with anyone and then find yourself cleaning out your closet on a Sunday afternoon to "make a little space" for their extra work uniform or even as tiny as keeping an extra toothbrush, clearing a hook in the bathroom, keeping their favorite snacks in the fridge, stuff like that. You'll generally feel at home with each other and trust can build VERY quickly. Others could even wonder if you're okay, especially if you're normally a paranoid person.
With Scorpio moon guy, he accidentally left his wallet the first time he left my place and I called him when I found it. His response was "Oh I left it at yours? Oh good, that's okay then, I'll come get it at some point this week, let me know what days you'll be home". He knew me for less than 24 hours at the time, lol. 3 months later he had the door code to my place and there were two toothbrushes and two towels instead of one LOL, trust was never an issue and it certainly wasn't the reason we didn't work out either! We basically just couldn't really keep pace with each other because... we had a 6 year age gap. Completely different life stages. I have a feeling if we both were a lot older, it would have worked out. Literally nothing else was wrong with us.
Now, that was with me being the Venus (and Ascendant-see below) person. I'll be honest, as a Capricorn moon, I'm curious about how it would be if I meet a Capricorn venus romantically. I wonder how that would play out all the time, and I think I'll let that remain a mystery until it happens, then I'll hopefully still be blogging then and come back and tell yall about that too. THAT BEING SAID... I do have this aspect (as the moon person this time) with a platonic Capricorn venus friend I had for nearly 13 years. We would literally be in each other's houses (and hair and business lol) all the time. We had yearly festivals we always went to together, talked almost everyday, knew how each other was feeling before the other one would even say anything. Mopped each other up off the floor when going through shit. She punched a guy I was dating who cheated on me, and I introduced her to a mutual friend who I thought she might like to date, and then cussed the hell out of him when he didn't pull his weight like I thought he would. Things like that.
The friendship ended nearly 7 years ago but I miss her every day. I remember what happened, but in hindsight, it seems so foolish now and I miss her every single day. We would have been friends for 20 years by now and I don't have a lot of regrets in life, but that is one of them. She hurt me but I handled it so poorly both before and after she reached out to talk that it just destroyed the entire foundation of our friendship. I haven't even tried to get over it because I don't want to. To me, that would be just disrespectful, I feel like it's something I need to carry with me as a reminder to do better next time. I'm sure you see by now that this is a quite an intense and dynamic placement!
Bonus Observation:
Moon Trine Ascendant Synastry
If someone with their moon conjunct your venus ALSO has their moon trine your ascendant, WHEW that is hot. Not only will the emotional connection be strong, but they will find everything about you on the outside just as enticing as the inside.
They genuinely enjoy the way you express yourself and can have a lot of patience for any shenanigans you might get up to. These people will watch you from across a crowded room all evening and suddenly appear by your side just before you leave to tell you they think you're attractive and want to get to know the rest of you beneath the surface. And it's rarely ever creepy. They'll know just how to approach you. I've had this synastry aspect a few times and it's always been like that. Genuinely charming. Perfect rizz.
This kind of synastry, as I said earlier, will leave you in absolute shambles if things don't work out, especially if you don't encounter this synastry often in your connections. Personally, I'd consider this one of those aspects where one or both of you can feel like the other was a soulmate, or "the one that got away," and end up being celibate or single (if romantic), or becoming asocial (if platonic) for a long time after splitting up. That or cycling through a series of awful relationship and friendship rebounds in an attempt to find them in another person.
Not too much on me for this, but there's a country song by Colt Fold that I'd loved for half a decade now called 4 Lane Gone. I'm sure there are other songs out there that would capture this better, but this is the one that stuck with me.
Something about the way this artist captures the feeling. Wistful, you can tell dude is acting strong, but knows damn well a good thing just got royally fucked up. Maybe I'm just melodramatic (I'm water dominant after all), but have a listen and see if you get what I'm talking about.
Idk. From my experiences with these aspects (been lucky enough to experience it with more than one person), I'd say it gives a pretty good idea of how either side could feel when it ends. Probably more so the Moon person, though, as they're likely to react like this to either a) being the one to end the relationship prematurely and regret it, or b) being blindsided by the Venus/Ascendant person up and leaving, and taking so long to process and recover from the shock, that by the time they chase after them...they're...well...four lanes gone. Lol.
youtube
Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Been raining for three days
On the fast track to the highway
Trying to save a little time
Lord I never should have tried
Taking this back road shortcut
Now I’m way stuck, so sunk
I’ll never catch her now
So I just put the tailgate down
She’s probably somewhere doing 95
I got nothing but this cooler and time
[Chorus]
I cracked one waiting on a ride
Two or three just to pass the time
While she’s headed to a new town
And I’m too lost to be found
She probably thinks that I don’t care
Stuck in the rut in the middle of nowhere
And just my luck I’ll be here all night long
Man, I’m bummed out back road buzzed
And she’s four lane gone
Yeah she’s four lane gone
[Verse 2]
Every empty beer can makes me
Miss her like hell, man I can kick myself
For the place and the shape I’m in holding me back
Yeah my wheels keep on spinning
And she’s ticked off blacktop fast
[Chorus] x 1
[Bridge]
While I’m stuck here all alone
With a midnight natty light
One more chance I’ve blown
[Chorus] x 1
[Outro]
I’m out here all alone
Yeah she’s four lane gone
She’s four lane, four lane gone
Yeah she’s four lane gone
She’s four lane gone
#synastry observations#astrology observations#astro notes#astrology#astrology signs#astrology tumblr#moon conjunct venus#moon trine ascendant#synastry#relationship astrology#friendship#friendship astrology#relationship
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So when I wrote down that Big Undertale Meta Post about how Sans probably doesn’t remember RESETs at all and why that’s cool - I got a lot of responses to the tune of ‘that’s probably canon but I’m still gonna enjoy Sans Remember fics because of the angst’. And, well... first I want to emphasize that those are very good and correct responses! Like ‘I acknowledge might or might not be in the text but I am also gonna explore alternative ideas Because I Enjoy Them’ is a Good Damn Position to have! Transformative Fandom is Transformative on purpose! Engage with the text and it’s various analyses but don’t let it chain your creativity or fun!
It’s just that… all of the people saying that they prefer Sans Remembering ‘for the Angst’ make me think that maybe folks are kinda ignoring the incredible angst potential of Sans NOT remembering.
My original post focused on how cool it is that Sans manages to be so on-top-of-things even though he doesn’t remember anything - but let’s not ignore the fact that this situation is also grim as shit.
Through some mysterious super-science or whatever, Sans has managed to discover that his timeline is being RESET and altered constantly (before the Player came along, Flowey had already managed to basically 100% the entire Underground) and he has no memory of what's going on and what exactly is being altered.
He knows he might’ve gone through the same day over and over and over again thousand times but he’s simply not aware of it. It’s all the helplessness and lack of forward momentum of a classic timeloop and none of the benefits of memorizing occurrences or acquiring extra information. That’s exactly the thing that drove him into his depressive spiral.
That line always strikes me. It’s like… Sans suspects that without the meddling of capricious immortal time gods, he’d be a much happier and motivated person. But he doesn’t know for sure, because he can’t remember how he was in some distant ‘original timeline’. He is essentially fighting to avenge a version of himself that might not even be real.
Like, yes, it is very impressive and badass how well Sans trained himself to notice every tiny little hint that might indicate that a RESET happened - but it’s impressive because the deck is stacked so heavily against him. And it is very impressive and badass how Sans managed to turn his weaknesses into strengths during his Boss Battle - but it’s impressive because these are usually huge weaknesses. Trying to work to solve a timeloop that you can only infer is going on through context clues is quite a hopeless and desperate mission!
Another bit in the Sans fight that I often think about is his unique reaction if you kill him and then RESET to Fight him again.
With how skilled he is at reading expressions, Sans probably knows what that ‘weird expression’ means, he knows the Player killed him once before and is here to try again. And yet he still goes along with the same attack plan he has, the one he knows killed him in that previous timeline. Why? Because he doesn’t know where the flaw in his plan was exactly, he can’t even begin to guess. So he has no choice but to go along with the plan he knows did kill him, because that’s the only thing he has.
You know, the thing about Sans, is that he always plays his cards very close to his chest. It’s very hard to tell what exactly he’s thinking. That’s probably why so many people do believe he remembers RESET. If any non-Flowey character remembered RESETs, only Sans would be remotely able to hide it so well. But for me? It makes me wonder how much of his Troll who Knows Too Much persona is a bit of an act as well.
You know, Sans’ deduction requires some keen observational skills - does he ever second-guess his conclusions? Living on constant high-alert that something has been reversed or that someone knows something they shouldn’t requires fostering a lot of paranoia, and that can’t be healthy for him. Is he ever overcome with doubt on whatever something was really an indication of a timeline RESET or not? How does he feel when he realizes something horrible happened on a previous timeline (for example, his brother dying) but he doesn’t know about the context to feel sure that he can stop it from happening again?
I also think about it in terms of his relationship to Papyrus in general. Sans tends to hide so many things from Papyrus, especially in timelines where the Player is particularly kill-happy...
In part it’s about his perception that Papyrus’ kindness and pacifism is born from naïveté and thus the only way to preserve it is to hide the cruelty and harshness of the world from him (Undyne also does that). But also, with the paranoia and helplessness Sans lives in every day - is it any wonder that he might believe that ignorance is bliss?
I do truly think it’s beautiful how fandom can experiment with cool non-canon ideas! There are probably so many great emotional angsty ideas tied up to Sans remembering RESETs! I just feel it’ll be a shame if people ignore just how dire and depressing Sans’ canon situation also is!
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Green Scarf, a Scarf Exclusive, out NOW on Patreon! 💚🏇🏻🧣
Horseback riding. A rainstorm. An injury...Tensions are high for Elvis and Reader. Taking place in June 1969. this Scarf Exclusive is a prequel to Pink Scarf and hopefully gives a little insight into Elvis’ state of mind in terms of Reader, and why things ignite between them so readily at the beginning of Pink Scarf. It may also give insight as to why Reader is having such strong emotions towards him the night of his Vegas comeback.
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SNEAK PEEK:
...
As the two of you ride out of the barn and onto the property and into the sweltering evening, he truly lets himself consider what it might be like if he just took what he has wanted for so long. It’s not just your body he needs—he aches for your soul, your love. He can never forget, as much as he’s tried, the way you writhed above him all those years ago, unknowingly changing him forever. He wonders, if you knew, if he told you he loves you and always has, what you would do.
Of course, even if he did bring it up, there is no guarantee you would have him, not after all this time.
“You’re awfully quiet over there, Mr. Presley,” you say playfully, yet with a tinge of concern, as you pull up next to him, snapping him out of his daydreams.
He clears his throat, trying unsuccessfully to think of something witty or charming or silly to say. But he gets preoccupied all over again when he looks at you, trapped in your beautiful eyes and the way your breasts bounce in time with the stride of your horse.
His cock twitches against his leg, as if he were a horny teenager.
Control yourself, asshole.
Forcing himself to look away from you, he does the only thing he can think of to distract himself. “Let’s race,” he says, eyes glinting with mirth.
You throw your head back and laugh.
“What?” he questions, smirking at you.
“You’re just such a boy sometimes,” you reply, eyes dancing.
Elvis makes a show of looking down at himself and then back up at you, grinning wide. “Last time I checked!”
“Mmhmm.” You may not realize the way your eyes wander over him, taking him in a little hungrily, but he sure does. It sends heat curling down his spine and his cock twitches again, alerted to the shift in your gaze. He suddenly wants to drag you off your horse and take you right here on the grass.
The air sits heavy and thick, and it is not just from the weather. He pulls in a labored breath.
“Ready? Set?” he says, shaking the tension away by looking into the distance and trying to keep himself from doing something monumentally stupid.
“Don’t you dare cheat!” you shout, but he’s already digging his heels into Rising Sun.
“Go!” he yells, already galloping away.
“Dammit, E!” you cry from behind. He chuckles as he hears you try to catch up.
The sprint does its work, honing and expelling his energy, and his thoughts fly away as he leans forward, pushing his horse to go faster. He loves the thrill of speed and the hint of danger it provides. It makes him feel alive. It makes him forget all the ways he covets what he cannot have.
Fat drops of rain begin falling from the darkened sky, splattering on his face and shirt, but he pays them no mind. He is distracted momentarily by you catching up beside him, grinning at him as you start to pass. Normally, he would do anything to win, but he’s so damn enamored with you today that he just relishes in the freedom and joy on your face. It’s when he realizes he hasn’t seen such happiness from you in a long while that the pang of guilt stabs him in the chest.
And it’s all my fault.
He shakes away the brutal thought and forces his head back in the race. Flying across the property through the rain, the two of you hedge each other the entire way as the fence comes into view. He’s inching ahead when suddenly he hears you scream.
...
Taglist Pt 1
@eliseinmemphis @russian-soft-bitch @tattywood
@sassanoe @thella @suspiciousmidge @hiddlepiddlediddlewiddle @carolinesbookworld @juggernort @aesthetic-lyss @stitchattacks @donnamarie23
@littlebitofgreen @paigevis @bugg06 @xhannahbananax03 @artlover8992
@18lkpeters @frozenhuntress67 @girlblogger2002 @kendralavon7 @misspresley
@be-my-ally @whositmcwhatsit @vintageshanny @ellie-24 @thatbanditqueen @powerofelvis @from-memphis-with-love
@precious-little-scoundrel @stylespresleyhearted @prompted-wordsmith @crash-and-cure @elvisgf @ohjustpeachy1 @lookingforrainbows @fic-over-cannon @godlypresley @ab4eva @whatstruthgottodowithit @elvisabutler @amydarcimarie @idontwanttoputanything @callieselvisobsessed @captainamerica1235-blog @xenaspace3-blog
@simplyamberj @claire-elvisgirl @everythingelvispresley @louisejoy86 @deniseinmn
#green scarf#scarf exclusive#scarf universe#pink scarf universe#elvis presley#elvis#elvis presley x reader#elvis x reader#austin butler elvis#if you’re looking for trouble#you came to the right place#pink scarf#💚🏇🏻🧣#elvis 1969#elvis smut#pink scarf prequel#angst#hurt comfort
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Alright so here is something a little different for you all! I hope you like it! Please let me know!
I’m writing a new Fic under the same name as my Captain Rex one but this time it’s a Bad Batch version. If it goes well I will keep writing it. Let me know what you think!
Cyare Verd *Beloved Warrior* Bad Batch edition
Chapter One
Honestly.....this is quite literally the last place I want to be. One time, and I mean one time Cid THOUGHT she was doing me a favor and I owed her. The only thing Cid did for me was get me a job. I happened to be one of the 'lucky' ones - if you can even call it that - when the Empire bombed Mandalore. Needing the money, I guess Cid thought a favor meant throwing my life on the line for her benefit, while paying me enough to put fuel in my ship and replenish SOME rations. Cid was never my favorite, but we do what we have to do. I have a skill set she wanted and she had something I wanted.
Out of the blue she calls saying she's got a job that needs my help. I said no naturally, but then she reminded me I 'owe' her. I know damn well I could storm in there and take her and her mercs out myself...however, she does pay and I wouldn't mind some dirty work. "Fine....I'll be there in 2 rotations", "You'd better be quicker than that, I haven't got all day", the woman makes my blood boil..... "Alright, alright, Udessi (Calm down), I'll be there by morning". I end the link before she can say anything else. I really have no interest in conversations further with her.
I ready my ship (a Kom'rk class fighter also known as the Gaunlet star fighter) or the jump to hyper space. The only reason why I told her 2 days was to get under her skin. We both know I could be there as soon as I want but honestly? I love butting heads with her. I swear if this mission doesn't pay well or pan out, I'll ruin her...
————
Having spent an unfortunate amount of time at CID's before I was used to the ships coming to and from Ord Mantell. However, this time there was one I did not recognize. It looked to be an Omicron-class attack shuttle but it was definitely modified. I land my ship next to it, and head over to admire it.
I take a walk around the hull of the modified Omicron, stopping at the front to use my HUD to scan it. Standing with my hands on my hips I let out an impressed hum. "Not bad. Looks like someone did all the work themselves. Quite impressive" I say flipping my range finder back up.
"That would be because I did it" Says a voice behind me. I spin around, drawing my dual Westar-35 blasters aiming them at the source. I'm met with an individual in black and red plastoid, datapad in hand, "I'm of no harm to you" he says putting up the visor to reveal goggles. His big bright brown eyes give me a once over, "Mandalorian. It's a wonder there are any left after-". I cut him off with a loud sigh and reholster my blasters before storming off toward Cid's. I immediately start to feel bad for the poor guy. My reaction was not really called for, but the loss of my home...of Mandalore, is still raw. The open wound, being pressed by a stranger who likely has no idea what's it's like was rather irritating to me.
————
Cid's Parlor is loud and crowded - as usual. I made my way to the bar where the blue Twi-lek bartender who I haven't seen in ages immediately recognized me. "Long time no see. I was starting to think you wised up" she joked. Poor girl always listened to me complain, but I'm probably the only person here who has ever shown her any sort of kindness. "Unfortunately I'm a little low on rations to be wise" I laugh. A rather large, obnoxious man comes over to me "Wow, that must be real Beskar.......Wonder what kind of price someone would pay for th-th-that...." He slurs a little at the end. I eject my vibro blade from my vambrace and press it to his neck "Try to take it from me and I'll find out how much someone will pay for your head" My words laces with venom. The bar tender laughs and slides a shot across the bar at me. I let go of the man who was rather caught off guard. Some of the other patrons at the bar are starting but I could careless. People usually stare when they see 'one of my kind'. "Don't mess with Mandalorians" someone says across the bar. I glance down and see another group of men in black and red plastoid - must be the poor guy from earlier is with them.
I slide my helmet off, letting my blonde hair fall. Placing my helmet on the bar top, I take the shot. The bartender nods over my shoulder and I sign knowing what's coming. "Aren't you a sight for sore eyes" Cid says throwing an arm over me like we are old pals. I roll my eyes "I'm not here because I want to be. Lets get on with it" I grumble. "No 'Hi Cid, how are you?'" She asks. "Nar'sheb (shove it)" I say with a polite smile on my face. She has no idea what I said to her but there's a snicker from someone close by.
————
"You know some day that attitude of yours is going to get you in trouble" Cid scolds me. "I'm not here to discuss my 'attitude'. What's the mission?", Cid stands behind her desk and crosses her arms "Fine, I need you to help out a group of fine gentlemen." She starts to explain. At this point I'm losing my patience "I work alone". "Not this time, look I'm sorry about the last job alright? You needed the credits, I had a job, but this time will be different I swear. These guys could really use someone with your skills. Dooku's private stash is being relocated by the empire and I want you to help them get as much as possible". The fact that she said Empire had my attention and attitude immediately shifts. "I thought you might like getting back at them and I promise I'll give you 20%" she continues noticing my mood lighten. "35 and it's a deal" I counter back. "Hey! I gotta pay those other guys too. I feel I'm being quite generous", "Fine 20%, Now who are these guys?", "They call themselves the Bad Batch. Wait here I'll go get them" and with that she heads out the door.
I set my helmet on her desk and lean against one of the book cases lining the wall. I fiddle with my gloves and my vambrace until the door opens. Cid, followed by 4 men - one of which was the guy from the landing zone - and a kid? Each of the men remove their helmets to reveal their faces. Clones? I stand up straight and rest my hands on my blasters. “Take it easy there Mando these are the good guys” Cid rolls her eyes after seeing my body language. The kid strolls over to me - clearly not intimidated at all - and sticks out her hand “Hi, Im Omega”. I quirk a brow at her before offering my hand, “This is the part you tell me your name” whispers Omega. “Right, Ni ceta (sorry). I’m Raven” I finally tell her. Her boldness takes me by surprise. I like this kid. Omega looks at the others who are standing there in silence. She nods my direction, and the largest one of the 4 pushes past, “I’m Wrecker! I like to blow stuff up!” He says very loudly. I shake his hand which compared to my hand - even with gloves on - looks like it could crush mine. “Wrecker, I feel that last part was not necessary” says the one from earlier - still holding a datapad. “I’m Tech by the way. We met briefly earlier” he continues. “Look I’m sorry about-“ I start before he cuts me off. “No need, it was rather insensitive of me to speak to you that way”. This causes the other two - one with a skull tattoo on half his face and the other with a socket for an arm. “So that modified Omicron is yours then?” I ask causing the one with the tattoo to now look at me. “Actually it’s my ship, the Marauder. I’m their Sargent, well was their Sargent and this is Echo.” Echo waves at me with his socket arm and a soft smile. I nod, “Look, no offense but whatever this mission is I can promise it’s dangerous. I don’t really feel like bringing a kid along with us is going to be a great idea” I say gesturing to Omega. “Hey! I go on plenty missions!” She protests. “Look, Omega. I like your spirit I do, but your a kid. I’m not going to let something happen to a kid” I explain to her. “She goes with us” Hunter says in a gruff voice, putting his foot down. I can see a little of myself in the way Omega is looking at me. She seems like a smart kid but I’ve seen enough damage the Empire has done, I’d hate to see this kid caught in the middle. I choose to say nothing and shake my head. “Let’s get on with it, shall we?” I ask grabbing my buy’ce (helmet) and sliding it over my head. With that, we all head out to the ships.
————
When I start heading towards my ship, I hear someone call out to me “wouldn’t it just be easier if we all rode together?” Omega asks. I stop and turn around “How do I know you won’t leave me behind?” I ask. I don’t really trust these guys. I mean how could I? The clones - even though it was at Palpatines hand - were the reason the Republic fell and we are in this mess. These guys seem different but I don’t have a reason to trust them. Omega, almost like she is reading my thoughts says “you can trust us, we aren’t like the others”. The others. I scoff to myself. Without saying anything I head up the ramp to my ship, gather a few things, and come back out to see Omega standing where I left her. The rest of the group must have gone to their ship. “I knew you’d come around!” She about jumps for joy before leading me onto the Marauder.
Omega shows me to ‘her room’ and tells me I can leave my bag there. I’m a little hesitant at first but I don’t have any other options at the moment. The only things in this bag are a couple changes of regular cloths and some rations. I’ve not got much to lose that isn’t my beskar these days. She then gives me a brief tour of the ship, ending at the cockpit where Hunter and the rest are talking…about me. Well, I didn’t actually hear them say anything specific, but by their body language and the way Hunter stiffens before he even saw me told me everything I needed to know. I decide to speak up, “I know you don’t trust me and that’s fine. We don’t have a reason to trust each other but once this mission is over and I’m paid I’ll be gone. You won’t have to worry after that”. They all glance at one another except Hunter, he’s watching me. “That seems reasonable” Tech says very matter of factly.
Seeing that there are no more available seats, I sit on the floor leaning against the wall. “So what’s the plan?” I ask a sliding my buy’ce (helmet) off. “Get to Serenno and scout the area.” Hunter says without looking over at me. I sigh, “That’s not much of a plan but I can improvise.” I hear a clunk and look over to see a curious Omega with my buy’ce (helmet) - she almost dropped - in her hands. “Sorry” she says when she notices she’s been caught. The rest of the batch turns to see what she had done. Hunter frowns and looks as if he was about to scold her, I give him a look before turning to her. I smile “It’s alright, you can’t hurt it. It’s already got a lot of scratches on it”. This kid makes me soft and I don’t know why. I mean she is just a kid after all. She turns it over in her hands, “where did you get it?”. Before I can answer Tech is already explaining it, “Mandalorian armor is passed down through families. Sometimes it is even reforged for the wearer.” Omega looks to me to confirm the story and I nod. “Not many people know much about my people, how is it you know so much?” I asked Tech. Wrecker lets out a loud sigh “ughhh you had to ask…” Tech gives him a looks “You see, I spend much of my time doing research and as you may know we are clones of Jango Fetts.”, “Yeah but you guys don’t look like the others” I point out. “We are….well….different. Each of us had a unique genetic modification. Wrecker is brute strength, Hunter had enhances senses, I have high intelligence, and Crosshair-“, “He’s with the Empire now” barks Hunter, interrupting Tech. “What about you?” I asked Echo. He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, “I was originally with the 501st under General Skywalker. There was an accident and I was blonde up, capture by the techno union and they made me mostly machine”. Hearing his story pulls at my softer side, “Ni ceta (I’m sorry)” I say to him. He gives me a soft smile.
“Woah” Omega interrupts the mood - thank Maker. She’s got my buy’ce (helmet) over her head, which quite honestly is kinda funny. It’s definitely too big for her. “This tech is outdated. You know, Tech could make some upgrades to this if you wanted” her voice sounds kind of funny through the modulator. I mull it over for a second, “We’ll see kid” I laugh at the image of her tiny frame with the giant buy’ce (helmet) on. I notice Hunter is watching the exchange between her and I out of the corner of my eye. I can tell by her silence she is playing with the HUD. “So how do you know Cid?” Omega asks. “You’re quite the curious one aren’t you?” I point out. She giggles and shrugs - still wearing my buy’ce. I sigh sadly, “After…..Let’s just say I was in a rough patch and needed some credits. Now I prefer to bounty hunt, but I refuse to work for the Empire”. Maker why am I spilling my guts to this girl? She’s a kid. This is probably the most I’ve ever talked about myself to anyone other than Cid. Which I know now was a mistake. Omega - reading the room - slides off my buy’ce and sadly looks at me, “Something bad happened didn’t it?”, I sigh again “I’d rather not get into it”. Hunter turns back around in his seat facing the front window. I glance over his direction this time. “What’s his deal?” I ask Omega. She looks fondly his way, “He’s really protective of me, of us really. He’s my family”. “Hold on to that kid. It’s special” I say to her. She looks at me with a smile.
I decide to lean my head back against the wall and close my eyes for a moment. I feel someone approach and a tiny head lay in my lap. I glance down to see Omega curling up to me, with my helmet still in her arms. She trusts too easily. Some day that might hurt her….like it did me….the only difference is, she’s got them and I had no one. Let’s just hope that’s enough.
Next Chapter
***A/N***
Thanks for reading! This is a little different than my last Fic but I thought I’d throw something else out there. I didn’t find a whole lot of Hunter Fics and definitely not one with a Mandalorian OC or reader so I figured I’d give it a shot. Let me know what you think!
#star wars the clone wars#starwars the bad batch#tbb hunter x reader#tech bad batch#crosshair bad batch#echo bad batch#wrecker bad batch#omega bad batch#the clones#the bad batch#mandalorian reader#hunter x oc
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KM Discord Server
As a POC (SE Asian) who was also dogpiled on a much a smaller scale in another discord server, and as one who'd witnessed in real time the events that unfolded in December 2023 in the KM discord server, I think the one thing that's been lost in all this chaos and drama is the human decency of giving people the benefit of the doubt.
Feel free to skip this section!
And for a little background, here's my experience: I reblogged a post on my blog and ranted about a few headcanons that I don't agree with in the tags. Some people read my tags, and concluded from that one post that I'm an outright ableist. Mind you, it was one day, and one post when I had absolutely no filter. Yet still, in which case, the conclusion drawn about me was fair, since in retrospect, I see where I went wrong. Again, I was frustrated for one day in that post and did not think of my tone whatsoever. I face the repercussions of that misjudgment today. For the record, just because I'm a POC, it doesn't mean that I'm immune to hurting other people, no matter the fact that that was never my intention. I did hurt certain individuals with that one damn post and the tags I wrote, and I'll be apologetic and remorseful about it for a long time. But having said that, I'd honestly expected certain people in this fandom to be mature enough to reach out in private first and ask for some clarifications, not to be immediately gossiped about in the discord server we were a part of. On top of that, besides that one incident, I hadn't even realized there was already growing resentment towards the metas I've written for KP/Kimchay, besides one of the few times I brought up personal frustrations I experienced as a POC. Lol
From what I've noticed with this incident in the KM server as well as the small discord server I was a part of, when POC share their own cultural context and understanding of something, not just the piece of media for which is the reason why we were all there in the first place, the knee-jerk reaction for most westerners are almost always to think of those things as "fandom policing."
In fact, in a separate conversation from my experience, one of them even said, "it's not so much about culture!" LOLOL To have that sentiment hurled towards me, while I was speaking of my frustrations of when culture erasure takes place in conversations of certain topics, while the conversation took place in a discord server meant to celebrate an Asian piece of queer media…was quite an experience. XD Goodness, I can only wonder what it's like to be able to have the privilege to say that so easily. That's all I'll say. Ha~
Yet still, from my own point of view, do I call the people who hurt me “individuals with a colonizer mindset” and that other word that’s hanging around right now and unsaid, just because of these few incidents? My knee-jerk reaction is to say yes, considering I wasn't even given a chance to explain myself, but I'll clamp that knee-jerk reaction down as much as I can, because despite everything, I still personally think the KM discord server and that other discord server still did more good than bad (not by much though), in the grand scheme of things. Those servers allowed for some instances of astounding cross-cultural communication (even if it also allowed rampant western ignorance to thrive), and for what it's worth, there are still good people in this community, despite everything.
And at the end of the day, who am I to hurl hurtful labels towards those who'd hurt me, when I hardly even knew them in the first place (two of them I never even talked to, LOL), and I know to myself that they meant no harm at the end of the day. Even if they certainly didn’t hesitate to throw the label “ableist” at me without a second thought.
It's a serious thing to throw a label like that at someone, even if my own experience as a POC who was dogpiled on by a number of westerners...hmm, let's stop that train of thought.
Getting back on track. Even still, these opinions I hold won't erase the experiences of other POC members in this fandom and in the KM discord server, the hurt they've experienced, nor can I speak for any one of them.
I think the bad habit of knee-jerk reactions—specifically the knee-jerk reaction of those wanting to protect the KM discord server in the way that's perceived to result in the least amount of drama, the gut instinct to not want to be caught in the crossfire, the conscious choice to tolerate such things, for the sake of preserving the safe space that one has left—is pretty much what's dominating the behaviors of people responsible right now.
The mods who run such servers like the KM server and others like it—they're not perfect, but I would have at least expected from them to be more open and proactive to the concerns of its POC members. Perhaps it's too much to expect that they would be equipped to handle very sensitive issues as the ones its POC members experienced, but damn...the bar is quite low, even just to meet the minimum.
And that's the most frustrating thing, to be honest. All this time, in all these various situations for those who’ve spoken out, it's the POC members of the community who are ALWAYS the ones who are pressured to having to give people the benefit of the doubt, to have to be careful of what they say, but NOWHERE in these situations is that sentiment even remotely returned to POC.
It was the POC members affected by the incident in December who had to remain patient with the mods, it was the POC members who had to face the backlash of negativity that happened, it’s the POC members of the community who’ve had to face the accusations of fandom policing, it’s the POC members of the community who have to face daily micro aggressions in this fandom, when all we’ve done is express opinions and our viewpoints.
At the end of the day, it’s POC members of the community who face the repercussions of having spoken out, yet the rest of the westerners in this community have the damn luxury to walk away, unscathed, to think to themselves that they did nothing wrong.
So I’ll be blunt this one time: yes, for the most part, there are good people in this fandom, there are. But even so, not a single one of us here is perfect, we’re all human.
And if I do say so myself, there is indeed quite a desperate need for fandom spaces, not just the KP fandom, to decolonize their ways of operating, starting with: giving POC the benefit of the doubt and actually trying to handle our concerns with some effort.
#KinnPorsche#KimChay#kinnporsche the series#KM discord server#yet again#another piece of Asian queer media#being taken over by westerners#and their callous attitude towards POC#what else is freakin’ new
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late night conversations
Description: Up late at night and unable to sleep, Regis runs into Ashley, and they have a conversation about many things.
Context: Takes place sometime after something to look forward to but probably can be read without reading it beforehand. It gives context to some of the conversations in the fic. Picture mostly here for flavor. I was going to reinstall my flycam mod to get a picture of them in conversation... but I misplaced my edited Coalesced so here’s this instead.
Pairing: Kaidan Alenko/Regis Shepard
Warnings: None, although Regis does not have a high opinion of Vakarian, and discusses why he chose not to recruit him.
“Can’t sleep?” Ashley asked as she joined him at the mess table, sitting across from him.
“Side effects of my L2 implants. Kaidan gets debilitating migraines, and while I do as well, I also get bouts of insomnia.” Regis sighed, tapping his fingers on the table. “What has you up late?”
She turned away from him. “Nightmares.” She didn’t elaborate, nor did Regis ask her to. If she wanted to talk, Regis would gladly oblige, but he could tell by her curt tone she was done talking about it.
Regis nodded. “We’ve seen some shit these past few missions. I’m here if you need me.”
“I know. You are a damn good CO, Shepard.”
“Thank you.” He cleared his throat, not really knowing how to respond to the compliment. “Want some tea?” He gestured over to the kitchenette. “It helps me.”
She shrugged. “Sure. I’ve never been much of a tea drinker but who am I to pass up an opportunity for you to do something for me.”
Regis rolled his eyes as he stood up from the table. “Well, you’ve never had my tea before, so maybe I’ll change your mind.”
He leaned against the counter after grabbing and preparing his preferred blend for nighttime relaxation, waiting for the water to boil. She joined him, crossing her arms against her chest. “I’m surprised Alenko didn’t come out with you.”
Regis smiled, setting out two mugs. “He’s a heavy sleeper, but if I don’t come back to bed in a bit, I wouldn’t be surprised if he pings my omni tool.” “Probably wondering why you didn’t just wake him up in the first place.”
“Yeah, well, I hate to disturb his rest. It’s a point we agree to disagree on.”
“I swear you two act like newlyweds, but haven’t you been together for a long time?” Ashley asked.
“Ten years, give or take, but this is the first time in a while we’ve been together for an extended period of time,” Regis said, taking the kettle and pouring the water in the mugs. “Got together a few years after biotic training, joined the Alliance together, and now we’re here.”
“Damn. I’ll get the full story out of you eventually.” She whistled.
“Maybe after I’ve gotten some sleep.” Regis huffed out a laugh. “We’ve been there for each other for so long, and while the Alliance definitely complicated things, we were able to power through it.”
“And now you’re here, abusing your Spectre benefits so you two can share a bed together,” she echoed, nudging his arm. “I would offer to go ring shopping with you, but something tells me you already have that figured out.”
Regis pulled out his dog tags from underneath his sweater. “I do.”
A black tungsten band with tree branch engravings rested next to his dog tags on the chain. Originally belonging to his father, it was one of the few things Regis had of his.
Atlas Shepard died in a freak shuttle accident before Regis was born, and he mourned the loss of what could’ve been. His father was earthborn, something Regis wished he was able to claim.
Instead, he was born in space on his mother’s ship, and rarely was able to spend time on Earth with his father’s family.
He took off the chain and handed it to her. “It’s beautiful,” she said. “I think it would fit him well.”
“Thank you. It belonged to my father,” Regis explained, taking the chain back from her. “He died before I was born, but my mother gave me his ring when I turned eighteen. He always kept his actual ring safe with her, even when they were apart, going for the tattooed option instead. I’ve worn it on me ever since.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” she said. “I didn’t know.”
He shrugged, moving to remove the tea bags from the mugs. “It’s not something I talk about much, so don’t worry about it. Even the scarves that Kaidan and I wear are because of him, something he put on his own armor to set himself apart.”
He held out a mug to her. She took it with a smile.
“I would offer to give you a hug, but I’m not sure it’s something you want.”
Regis pulled her into a side hug. “I appreciate the thought, now try your tea.”
She took a sip after squeezing him back. “Not bad, Skipper.”
“Thank you.” He replied, taking a long sip of his. Just what he needed. A warm drink with a friend.
“You can tell me to fuck off if I’m overstepping, but are those tattoos on your right arm because of that ring?” She asked after a moment of silence.
He nodded. “Yeah. Based on the Yggdrasil tree. Makes me feel like I’m connected to Earth and to him.”
“Just like the scarf, so you could connect yourself to LT and to your dad,” She observed. “Making him part of your family.”
“And one day I’ll order you a scarf and make you a part of it officially,” he said, smirking at how she nearly choked on her tea.
“Seriously?” She asked, hesitant, after clearing her throat and setting down the mug.
“Of course. You are part of my crew, and I’d like to consider you a friend.”
“You really do care,” she smiled. If he looked closely, perhaps he could see a little wetness gathering around her eyes. He chose to ignore it.
“Black and blue would look good,” he continued. “I’ll see to it after this mission is done. Maybe even get you a nice, requisitioned set of gear since I’m also recommending you for the N program.”
She blinked a few times in surprise. “I need to sit down,” she said, walking back over to the table. “Why? Why all this for me?”
“Because you are a damn good soldier who doesn’t deserve the shit you’ve been given. If my word can help you climb out of the hole, then why shouldn’t I give you that chance? Your marksman scores rival my own, you work excellent under pressure, and you’ve grown to work well with a diverse team. As your CO, it’s an obvious decision,” Regis explained, rejoining her at the table. “I don’t do this lightly, as I’m sure you’ve heard the stories of my teaching days. You’ve earned it.”
She took a deep, shuddering breath. “God, Shepard, you really know how to catch someone off guard. And in the middle of the night? I’ll be more coherent about this after I’ve slept on it.”
“But do you accept it?” Regis asked. “I am sorry for springing this on you, but it’s something I’ve been preparing for a while. Anderson is also backing me on this.”
She blinked a few times before breaking out into a smile. “Hell yeah I accept, but give me time to really think about it, y’know?”
“As much time as you need.”
Ashley finished off her tea, pushing the mug to the side. “This was not how I expected this conversation to go.”
Regis chuckled. “Well, how did you think it was going to go?”
“Thought I was going to get more juicy Shepard secrets out of you, but instead you render me speechless.”
“Well, I’ll let you ask another question. Maybe two.” He winked, finishing his tea.�� “It’s only fair since I’ve learned a lot about you and your family. Ask away.”
She glanced down at the dog tags still resting against his sweater. "You know, I'm curious. Why didn't you recruit that C-Sec officer, Vakarian?"
With the way she kept glancing at his dog tags, he didn't expect her to go down that route, but it was a valid question. “I had a hunch about him that I didn’t like. Way too insistent he was right about Saren but had fuck all to prove it. After gaining my status and grabbing Tali and Wrex, I realized I never followed through on his lead. So, I used my status to access his file, see what kind of officer he was.”
“I’m guessing you didn’t like what you saw.”
“No. Evidence tampering, witness coercion. Hell, even assault, among other things. A loose cannon like that on my crew? He would see justice as a means to an end, any way necessary,” Regis explained, shaking his head. “Disappointing, but ultimately, I saw him as a liability. If he can’t handle the rules of C-Sec, I doubt he would have followed my orders in the end.”
“He probably just heard ‘Butcher of Torfan’ and thought you would be all for it,” she said.
“I never made that decision lightly.” He looked away. “I embraced it, but it has pinned me as someone who will get the job done, no matter the cost. While that may be true sometimes, it’s something I try to avoid.” He sighed. “Yes, I imagine he had a certain image of me.”
“I gave the order knowing damn well it was the only way out. I took the fall so everyone else would survive, while I became the monster. The demon. The Butcher. But the families of the dead know what I did for them, what I sacrificed to make sure they got what they deserved, to ensure their loved ones died with honor and not the shame of my order. The thing is? I wasn’t the only one in support of it, but I made damn sure that the Alliance thought it was only me. And look what it gave me. Scars, a path to N7, and a title that makes my mother hate me even more.”
Regis ranted to Kaidan after the events and trials of Torfan, hoping the other man would understand why he did what he did. What it did to him. Kaidan listened and continued to support him, despite everything.
The promise to have each other’s back was not about to be broken that day.
“You’re a good man, Shepard. Don’t let that title force you into being something else. I’ve seen the way you think, and I can tell you weigh all the options before jumping in. It’s what I respect about you,” she said, finishing off her tea. “Sorry for bringing it up.” More surprised she hadn’t already brought it up, he waved it off.
“Go on, ask what you really wanted to ask. Don’t think I didn’t see you looking at my tags,” Regis said, teasing a little.
She rolled her eyes. “Fine, but you asked for it. Do you ever worry about losing that ring if something were to happen?”
He raised an eyebrow, surprised she went there of all places, but he obliged. “Sometimes. I don’t like the idea of dying somewhere I cannot be retrieved, but once I had this ring, I didn’t want to part with it. Then, once Kaidan and I made it official, I knew I wanted to give it to him one day. Either way, if something does happen, he’s the one that ends up with everything of mine. I just hope it never comes to that.”
“Thank you for telling me that, I guess I was just wondering how you thought about the ‘what ifs.’ Not sure what came over me there.” She rubbed at her neck, looking a little embarrassed.
Regis took a stab at it. “Might it have something to do with your nightmare?”
“Maybe.” She sighed and stood up from the table. “I really need to try and get some more sleep. You should too.”
He could guess about what it was really about. She’s the sole survivor of her squad on Eden Prime. No time to give them the respect they deserved. Some even put into research to find out what the geth were capable of and how to defend against it.
Regis did not want that to be his fate. An experiment. He remembered the look Ashley gave him when he ensured Bhatia got his wife’s body back. One of surprise and respect, probably thinking he would’ve instead denied the man’s request.
Would it have helped the Alliance? Likely.
At that moment? Regis did not care for what the Alliance wanted.
“Yes, he definitely should. Love, get your ass back to bed, please.” Kaidan emerged from his quarters, his hair mussed up and curling, looking more than a little annoyed.
Oops.
Ashley laughed. “Told you so! Good talk, Shepard. Next time, let’s do it at a more reasonable time.”
“I make no promises,” he said, moving to put the mugs in the sink to be dealt with later. “Good night, Ash.”
She nodded and headed back to the crew quarters.
Kaidan stood outside the door with his arms crossed. “Told you to wake me.”
“And you know I never will, Kaidan.” Regis yawned. “Shit, it’s going to be a long day tomorrow.”
“Whose fault is that?” Kaidan reentered their quarters; Regis followed behind him.
“My damn implant’s.” Regis muttered, removing his sweater and his fatigues, leaving him in his boxers.
Kaidan rolled his eyes, deftly removing his uniform and crawling back under the covers. “In any case, did you have a good talk with Ashley?”
Regis settled in next to him, putting Kaidan’s arm around him, snuggling in close. “Yeah. Told her about the N recommendation, among other things.”
“Hmm. How did she take it?” Kaidan asked, holding Regis tightly. Clingy bastard.
“Shocked but well overall. I really do think she has the potential to succeed in the program.”
“I agree. Now, go to sleep, Regis.”
“You do too, you know.”
“Yes, love.”
“You’re ignoring me, aren’t you.”
“Because I want you to get some sleep. Need me to grab your meds?” Kaidan turned around to face him, cupping Regis’s face in his hand. “I just worry about you.”
A part of Regis wanted to go ahead and just give Kaidan the ring right then and there, wrapped up in his love and support, but he wanted to do it in front of their family, surrounded by their friends and loved ones.
Regis leaned into the touch. “I know. I’ll be fine.”
“Right. Next time, wake me.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too. That’s not a yes.”
“It’s not a no!” Regis smiled and yawned once again. “Alright fine, I’ll get some sleep.” He leaned in and pecked Kaidan on the lips.
They wrapped their arms around each other, and soon Regis fell asleep listening to his lover’s breathing, content within his arms.
#regis shepard#mass effect#mshenko#ashley williams#cleric's writing#mass effect fanfiction#good conversations were had but sprinkled with by usual tragic implications :)#i swear it hurts me too#kaidan alenko
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.
honestly even 9 years later the whole situation with my dad STILL feels like a nightmare. even after all that time and all that therapy, it haunts everything. there's always going to be a before and an after in my life. and that doesn't mean i can't have a GOOD life, i fully intend to, but like
THIS is the impact of suicide. lives forever altered, parents and children and siblings and spouses for whom this Event becomes the turning point of everything that comes after. people who become statistically more likely to also engage in many various forms of self-harm as result.
seeing a suicide lauded as martyrdom/heroism/principled political action is painful in a way i don't know how to express. im obviously biased, but, unfortunately, i also feel like i'm more qualified to talk about this topic than many. i wish i wasn't.
please. your life is important. it is worth so much more than your death ever could be. there is no cause in the world that is benefited by further violence and death, there is no moral stance that can be legitimized through ritual suffering.
like i don't CARE if self-immolation has been used as a form of protest in the past. a) those people actually belonged to the group under fire and b) the fact that it was an effective form of protest does not make it inherently good. there are OTHER WAYS to fight back, ways that don't involve doing the oppressors' work for them, permanently taking yourself OUT of the resistance.
to give your life for others is noble, to TAKE YOUR OWN LIFE in an act of political theater is misguided at best and self-absorbed at worst. here you say "i can give you this moment of spectacle, going out with a bang, but now i am done helping. Now you are on your own. I am very purposefully no longer here for you, but it's okay because it *might* make others care."
i am angry and devastated and disgusted by how the online left has been treating this tragedy. if you're so god damned dedicated to the cause and find this man so admirable then put your money where your mouth is. Except you WON'T because *it is not the act of a stable person who has things to live for.*
and people wonder why the left can't get anything done
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Kinktober 2024: Car Sex
2 weeks in! We're almost halfway done with the entire thing!! I hope you guys are in for a ride. (Pun fully intended)
Ship: Aurelia Ryder/James Vega Content Warning: fighting, aphrodisiac, dubcon (just cause of the aphrodisiac), p in v, supernatural au Length: 2.1k (The fucking shortest one out of my Kinktober)
Aurelia waited on the curb outside The Last Line with her arms loosely crossed in front of her as she watched the traffic for the familiar shape of Vega’s car. They were going on a mission together which was odd as he never wanted to pair up with her. Claimed that he’d be too distracted trying to protect her than on the job, which she called absolute bullshit on. She could take care of herself just fine. That Amazonian blood from her mother helped in that regard, despite being a bit diluted. She’d gotten enough of it to gain the benefits, and only a few of the downsides. She leaned her weight onto one side when it didn’t look like James was going to be picking her up anytime soon.
“I should’ve sat inside,” she grumbled as the people walked around her. Aurelia ran a hand over her hair, trailing over the braid that went down her back. She perked up as the SUV pulled up to the curb and he rolled down the window with a cheeky grin. “You’re late,” she said as she opened the door and slid inside.
“I had to pick up something for the mission. And I also got you this,” he said as he placed the coffee in the cupholder next to her. Aurelia glanced down at it when she buckled in and then at his cheesy grin.
“You think you can just bribe me like that?” Aurelia asked while reaching for the cup.
“I do. You’re pretty easy to bribe, mi vida.” Aurelia wrinkled her nose at his observation before he pulled off into traffic. They were on their way to a scouting mission and she still wondered why Vega wanted to partner with her. He parked his car in the semi-empty parking lot near one of the last shopping malls in their town, a relic of the past is what Alec described it as.
“What kind of mission are we doing anyway?” Aurelia asked as he pushed his seat back. She arched an eyebrow as she watched him and he reached and released the seatbelt around her. “James…” Aurelia warned him before he grinned at her. “If you don’t tell me what we’re doing here, I’m going to wear a silver choker for a week.”
“You’re evil, you know that?” Aurelia just crossed her arms and glared at him. “Fine, fine. Here’s the report,” James said as he handed over the file to her. Aurelia flipped it open and her lips thinned as she recognized the description. This demon in particular was hard to catch. Somehow it always managed to slip through their fingers like smoke, and Archer vowed he’d track the damn thing down and wring its neck himself. Aurelia hadn’t paid much attention. She rarely worked cases with desire demons or other supernatural creatures that would invoke that kind of reaction.
“The demon has been seen only attacking couples that are…” Aurelia trailed off and her eyes jerked to his with a mutinous glint in them. “Having sex in cars.” He recognized the warning in her eyes but he hastily went on to explain his plan.
“We aren’t really going to be doing it. But if we can be convincing enough then the demon will show up.” She sighed and shook her head.
“I don’t usually work these kinds of cases Vega, and you know why right?” He looked so confused as he stared at her, Aurelia had the sinking realization he truly didn’t know why. “I don’t work them because that kind of effect… I’m more susceptible to them.” James still looked at her strangely and she heaved a weary sigh. “Any creature that produces an aphrodisiac effect, like a desire demon? I have no defenses against them. I can’t resist. Half the time I get a nose full of that and I’m down for twice as long as you or Archer would be.” Aurelia explained carefully and she saw the horror in James’ eyes as he realized what kind of risk they ran with her there now. “Do you have a mask or something? No, that doesn’t work that well either. Ugh, I’m trusting you to be the levelheaded one this time,” she told him as her finger poked his collarbone.
“Me?” Aurelia laughed but nodded.
“Yes, you. As soon as this demon shows up, I’m going to be useless. I’ll have maybe thirty minutes before that aphrodisiac effect kicks in, and then I’m not going to be able to move until it wears off.” She tilted her head back against the seat as she waited for James to say something. She’d never wanted to reveal that was her weakness, but there they were. Only Archer and her father knew why she didn’t take on any of the succubus or desire demon missions.
“I won’t let it hurt you.” Aurelia looked over at him and her eyes crinkled with her smile and laughter.
“I’d hope so. But we’ll go ahead and get this mission started. Now that you know what’s at stake,” she said before she shifted and soon straddled his lap in the car. His hands rested on her hips with his thumbs stroking just above the waistband of her jeans. It was a cramped fit and her left calf threatened to cramp up if she didn’t move it. Her shoulders and back were hunched over, she cursed her damned height sometimes. Aurelia leaned down and covered his lips with hers, she savored the way his fingers dug into her hips when her tongue swept against his bottom lip. They didn’t have to wait long for the demon to show itself, the sickly sweet smell of opiates reached them soon after their lips connected. Aurelia clenched her jaw and shared a look with James. He nodded and they braced for whatever the demon was going to do next.
Aurelia yelped when the window shattered next to her head, and a lavender clawed hand reached in to grab her braid in a merciless grip. “Bitch.” Aurelia didn’t waste time. She grabbed her braid by the base of her skull and yanked the demon towards the car. A victorious smirk curled on her lips when the demon screamed out in pain as it slammed into the side of the car. It released her braid and she opened the door. Aurelia slipped out and stood between the demon and the SUV. She’d buy James enough time to get the weapons he’d need to take down the demon.
“A Ryder? Oh, you’re the female Ryder. My night just got so much better.” The demon’s lips curled back in a vicious snarl. Aurelia bit back the shudder that threatened to go down her back and she fought against the throbbing between her legs. This was more potent than she thought, normally she had a little time before the effects sank their hooks into her.
“Yeah? I’m about to make it a nightmare for you,” Aurelia told them before she tossed her coffee at the demon’s face, still piping hot. The screech ratted her teeth but she didn’t have the luxury of hesitating. She’d seen Vega slip to the side of the SUV and she could only hope he’d be quick. Aurelia lunged forward just past the demon, pivoting on her heel, and grappling the demon. The head of the demon barely came up to her shoulder but they were as strong as any giant Aurelia fought. Her muscles strained to keep them from escaping.
“Vega!” Aurelia snapped, more harshly than she intended, and she finally saw him skirt around the back of the vehicle. The demon screeched and James dropped the dagger. Aurelia knew the risks she was about to incur. A desire demon’s scent was a potent aphrodisiac but would only last for an hour or two, in her case three or four. If a desire demon bit you… Aurelia resigned herself to a long night and stuck her arm in the demon’s mouth to muffle the screeching. Lycanthropes were weak to sound and she knew that screech was mind numbing for James. Her arm cut off the sound and James recovered quickly. Aurelia winced as the demon’s fangs sank deep into her arm and she saw the victory light in their eyes but Aurelia merely sneered.
The demon’s mouth dropped open when the dagger slammed into their chest and Aurelia winced as well. The end came through and stabbed her a little. She wanted to cry because saliva was bad enough, but blood? She wasn’t going to remember her damn name for almost a damn day at this rate. James looked up as Aurelia stepped away and he saw the blood stain on her shirt.
“I’m fine. I’m fine. Make sure. Make sure you finish, okay?” Aurelia asked as she waved towards the demon’s body on the asphalt. He nodded and she stumbled towards the car, her mind already hazy with heated fantasies. She clenched her teeth and grabbed the first aid kit and bandaged her arm. That was as far as she got. Aurelia shut the door behind her in the backseat and she tugged off her pants. James could take her straight home after this.
The heat consumed her thoughts and she was already on her third orgasm when he flung open the door. His nostrils flared as her smell reached him. She managed to mumble a sorry, she was sorry about ruining the seats. He climbed in and shut the door behind him, shifting her until she straddled his lap in the backseat. “Mi vida.” Aurelia whined at the nickname, her lips covered his in a clumsy, sloppy kiss and her hands cupped his cheeks as she nibbled at his bottom lip. She felt his cock straining against his pants beneath her but she wanted to taste him. Her tongue dipped inside to tangle with his, and she groaned at the taste of adrenaline. His fingers curled in the back of her shirt when the kiss turned darker. Her fingers trailed down his face to his chest and to the hem of his shirt. She ran her hands up his abdomen, taking the shirt with them. His hands slid under her shirt, cupping her breasts in his hands and squeezing.
She groaned at the heated pleasure consuming her body. Her pussy was drenched, his lap was drenched from her. James set his teeth against her shoulder as he felt how far gone, she was. Their lips parted when she tried yanking his shirt over his head. He twisted to pull it off and tossed it to the side, only to groan when her hands tossed her shirt to the side. He saw where the glass peppered her skin, the tiny red marks littering her skin showed him that. He wanted to hold off, she was probably in a lot of pain from her injuries, but when he suggested it. She’d devoured his lips in a heated, sloppy kiss once again.
“Just fuck me, James.” He growled and pulled her close. He wanted to have some patience for her. Aurelia reached between them and tugged until his cock sprang free from his jeans. Before he could even utter a word, she was sinking down on him. His head fell back against the seat with a hiss and groan. His fingers dug into her hips as she didn’t give him a second to orient himself. Her hips rocked against his, chasing that finish line for both of them. Aurelia leaned in and kissed him while she bounced on his cock. His hands cupped her ass, squeezing tight with each groan he heard from her.
“Fuck. Slow down,” James whispered but she wasn’t paying attention to him.
“No.” He shuddered when her teeth nipped at his throat. His neck was always his sensitive spot, and she knew it. He clenched his jaw and let his head fall back. James groaned as her body squeezed down on his cock and his name left her lips. He thrust up to meet her and bit out a harsh curse when his own orgasm slammed into him. His breathing was heavy and choppy when her body slowly slumped forward.
“Take me home James. Please. It’ll only get worse from here,” Aurelia whispered and he felt his cock stirring at her words. “At home, not here. Okay?” Aurelia asked and he agreed. She slid off his lap and he tucked himself back in before climbing into the driver’s seat. He saw her stretched out in the rearview and those strong fingers dipping between her legs.
“Fuck, Aurelia.” She wanted to whine at the growl in his voice. The lust wouldn’t let her think straight anymore. The only thing she wanted was to get off, and to keep getting off.
James knew it was going to be one long ass drive home with his girlfriend in the backseat masturbating. Hopefully the cops wouldn’t mind if he broke a few speeding laws.
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Just adding few points from myself:
Law was after poneglyphs in the timeskip after all, huh. Maybe we really overlook his declaration about going after the one piece treasure. Seems he was 100% serious about it.
This really explains why he asks Robin here about it, it's to make sure. Seems before that moment he was searching for poneglyphs blindly and went after each and every one he heard about (Pirate island was a good shot, I will give him that). Now finally he has a clear direction. I wonder how does he know that he has to search for the poneglyphs to find the one piece tho?
God damn it, he's even MORE reckless than I thought he is. He hijacked a passenger ship ALONE? Picked up a fight with the whole Hachinosu on his very own?? That's even more crazy than what Garp did! And people claim that Luffy with Law is like madman paired with a normal sane guy. Wrong! Those two fit into same insane category, excuse you??
From the sound of it, that was yet another mission he did while leaving Hearts behind. Polar Tang is not even used for this little escapade. Imo that means Polar Tang was left behind with Law's crew, while he proceeded on his own. Sounds like a pattern to me...
I'm not surprised he orchestrated the whole thing (we were told he was the mastermind of Rocky Port Incident after all), neither that he worked together with Koby, that much I figured out already. I even expected him to be like "let's work together, I will gain something I want from it, and you will as well" (it means Law was the one who put Koby in charge of saving passengers!). What I'm surprised about is that Law also worked together with Blackbeard of all people. I thought Blackbeard would just waltz into Hachinosu after all is done and take over the unprotected island, but nope, apparently Blackbeard can also take some initiative instead of just benefitting from actions of others. Interesting that Blackbeard isn't beyond cooperation as well, huh.
Not surprised Law had no problem working with a Marine and one of the worst pirates out there. It never stopped him before lol. Caesar, anyone? Law did have an actual agreement with him! It's funny how people either gloss over this fact like it was never a thing or overemphasize it to prove that Law is no better than Caesar is.
I'm so tempted to write a post in which I would mend together Law's grand plan, but I'm always hesistant before stepping into murky waters. But this SBS reveal about Rocky Port Incident actually does fit my hypothesis so far, even better than I expected it to, hm. Choices, choices...
I guess it's because I have no clue why Law told Luffy they will be enemies from now on, at the end of Wano. It doesn't really add up. Law's deep dedication to Luffy, Law's goals aligning somewhat with his, Law starting to open up more to people, and then boom, the "enemies" bomb got dropped instead. I have a few reasonable explanations, but I always feel like I'm missing a major piece of the puzzle.
The Rocky Port incident...
...turned out to be another instance of Law meticulously crafting a plan only to shoot himself in the foot, then forming an emergency alliance and somehow turning the tide in his favor. That's incredibly consistent 😭
But now everything makes more sense. It seems Law's intended bargaining chip for becoming a Shichibukai was to hand over a Poneglyph/rubbings to the World Government, and he was accepted not because he submitted 100 hearts of random pirates, but primarily because he played a key role in taking down Ochoku and saving some VIP royalties (also for securing the Poneglyph, I suppose).
According to the translation we have in hand rn, the name of the vessel Law hijacked was "Rocky Port". We know there's a port in Hachinosu with the same name. Maybe it was named after the ship after this incident.
But what "important" Poneglyph was there, anyway?
I don't think it's the missing Road Poneglyph. Probably a Rio Poneglyph protected by the resident pirates. I wonder if Law was originally looking for the Road Poneglyph possessed by the man marked by flame, but then changed his target. Curious that he didn't know two of the Road Poneglyphs are possessed by pirates, let alone Kaidou and Linlin..
The chaos that broke out was not part of Law's plan, he was lucky that Blackbeard arrived to join the fun, and they could come to an agreement. Koby, on the other hand, was probably the only marine who agreed to work with the pirates, and thus was able to save the most number of innocent 'Rocky Port' passengers.
I'm pretty sure it was Law who proposed the alliance. Scoring cookie points aside, his conscience surely kicked in. It wasn't his style to drag a ship of innocent civilians to a devil's nest, so he offered to form a pact with the marines to reduce casualty. Without his presence that buffered both sides, a three way alliance wouldn't have been possible.
I had a hunch that Blackbeard and Law might have worked together for some time. But why did Blackbeard need to work with Law? Was Ochoku that strong?
It seems Law didn't know Blackbeard could use two fruits at once (during their flight at Winner island), so Blackbeard likely didn't go all out. Possibly it was of Blackbeard's best interest to secure his victory without greatly damaging the island that he was soon going to rule, so he decided to follow Law's plan. He likely invited Law to his crew too, similar to Kuzan.
In retrospect, it makes sense as to why the alliance with the Straw hats puzzled Law so much, it wasn't because he didn't expect the chaos but because it was entirely different from his previous experience.
I didn't expect the main story the dive deep into Rocky Port incident, it was only a matter of time until we got a short summary. There's enough meat to it to extend it into a short comic, and there's plenty of time in future.
For now, I'm looking forward to the Japanese fanworks flood on Monday 🍿
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Baxter Avenue
“So who’s your new man ?” Eyebrows furrowed you cocked your head to the side wondering what Urban was talking about.
“My new man ? I have no new man. Who told you I was with anybody anyway?.” You told him he smirked blowing a cloud of smoke opposite to where you were sitting.
“I got a whole lotta friends in Louisville Y/N. You know they gonna tell me who they seen you on the avenue with.” Urban told you before tossing out his blunt to the side of the sidewalk once done.
Urban and You were well friends with benefits while on the road with Jack he made sure Sunni and Cozane and a few of his other friends looked out for you and kept guys away from you. Back in High School the girls hated you and the guys wanted you but you never really understood why because you were always self conscious in yourself.
“So you got people watching me now or what? That’s kinda creepy don’t you think Urban.” Laughing as you leaned your back into Urban’s chest. It was your idea to go out for a picnic and spend some much needed quality time with Urban, he was back in town for a few days before it was back on the road with Jack.
“They aren’t watching you ma they’re just well making sure you’re alright and good when I’m not here. What’s wrong with that huh? I can’t have extra eyes on my girl or what.” He asked leaning down and kissing your cheek making you smile and giggle. He always knew how to make it feel like you had endless butterflies flying around in your stomach.
“Well I mean I guess it’s not a bad thing but you know guys don’t even approach me Urban or find me attractive. I really don’t understand why you find me attractive maybe it’s why you don’t officially make me yours.” You mumbled twirling around the sunflower in your hand Urban gifted you when he first picked you up from your house.
“First of all stop saying that shit you’re everything and more ma you’re so damn beautiful and gorgeous. Remember all them girls in High School that wouldn’t even speak to you or the entire football team and how they would drop whatever they were doing to help you. You’re everything and more Y/N, I’m the one who doesn’t deserve you.” Urban expressed making your heart flutter at his words.
You’ve known Urban you’re entire life and he wasn’t one to express his emotions but hearing that come from him was enough to know he truly did love you and had love for you.
“I’m also glad it’s just us here two because I wanted to know, will you become my girl? I want you to be mine.” Urban told you making you lean your head back on his chest and look up into his blue eyes and smiled.
“I’d love to be your girl Urban and maybe even Mrs. Wyatt I feel like Y/N Wyatt has a wonderful ringtone to it don’t ya think?” The two of you instantly laughing Urban shaking his head before connecting his lips to yours.
“I love you ma.” Urban said as he leaned against the tree watching how you took your hand in his and measured the size of his hand against yours. He smiled softly, you were his everything.
“I love you too Urban.”
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Father of Mine – 2/2
Character: Bruce Wayne x Daughter!Reader
Summary: With the tragic passing of her mother, Y/N learns to the truth of who her father is.
Word Count: 4,100+
Warnings: absent father, subtle violence, mention of family death
A/N: The reader is described as tall in this fic. Bruce Wayne is 6′2 and I’m tall, so I’m indulging myself with no apologies. Read it or don’t.
Part 1
Bruce was working in the cave when Alfred interrupted him.
“Master Wayne, a guest has arrived unexpectedly.”
Bruce gave him a strange look. Hardly anyone showed up to the manor unannounced.
“Ms. Y/L/N,” Alfred added.
“Right,” Bruce sighed.
“She’s waiting for you in your office.”
Bruce found Y/N pacing in the room, refusing to take the seat that he was sure Alfred offered her.
“Y/N,” he greeted, remembering how she disliked the formalities last night.
She whipped around at his greeting. “Am I your charity case now?”
He feigned confusion. “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”
She looked offended by his lie. “Don’t insult my intelligence. You paid all of my outstanding expenses that my mother left me.”
Bruce opened his mouth.
“Don’t try to lie to me,” she warned.
Bruce closed his mouth.
“Look, I don’t need your help,” Y/N sighed in obvious irritation. “Did you or did you not pay them?”
He took in a shallow breath, “I did.”
Y/N clenched her jaw as Bruce finally admitted his deed.
“I was only trying to help.”
“You can’t just throw money at me and expect it to make up for being a no-show.”
Bruce tensed.
Did that mean…Did she know?
“You read the letter?” He asked.
“No,” she clarified. “But I figured it out.”
“I had no idea,” he tried to tell her.
“I don’t care,” she almost snorted.
“You have ever right to be angry with me…”
“I’m not angry. I’m annoyed.”
She took a defiant step toward him and crossed her arms.
The heeled boots she had on caused her already tall height to make her be eye to eye with Bruce.
How many people had faced off with Batman and cowered with fear?
But she didn’t submit or show any signs of intimidation.
“Do you think I cried myself to sleep every night as a child, wondering where my dad was or why he didn’t want me?” Y/N hissed.
Bruce didn’t respond.
“You think I give a fuck about the father-daughter dances? Or whatever the hell people think dads are only capable of doing?” She narrowed her eyes. “The thing is…I didn’t need you. I didn’t need you then and I don’t need you now.”
Bruce felt sick as he listened to her.
“I have the sneaking suspicion that you wouldn’t have been there for those anyway,” she added roughly. “My mom loved me more than enough. I didn’t need anyone else. And she made damn sure of that.”
“So I’m not your charity case to make yourself feel better after my mom made it clear she thought it was better to keep me from you, than to ever tell you that I existed. Says a lot about what kind of person she thought you are, huh?”
When Y/N finally stopped, she was taking deep breaths.
Bruce wondered how long she had that all bottled up. He didn’t think anything she said was a lie. Y/N didn’t need him. That had become clear.
She had grown up to be a successful, intelligent, and independent young woman.
And she got that way without a father figure of any sort.
After a few moments, Bruce finally bowed his head and cleared his throat. “I never intended on making you feel like a charity case.”
Bruce saw as Y/N took in a deep breath and the guilt slowly took over her expression.
“Look,” Y/N sighed, “we finally know the truth. Let’s just…let’s just move on with our lives. OK?”
Bruce couldn’t deny that the suggestion hurt.
After processing the news over the past week or so, he realized he wanted to get to know her. This wasn’t the first time a child of his had been dropped on him far too late. He had failed Damian in so many ways because of it.
But Y/N was a young woman, fully developed and independent now. And Bruce couldn’t help but wonder that him being absent from her childhood had only benefitted her.
“If that’s what you want,” he finally told her.
Y/N didn’t know him well enough to hear the underlying pain in his words.
So she simply nodded and walked past him, having nothing more to say.
——————
Bruce adjusted his tie. He wanted nothing more than to rip it off his neck.
But he was on his best behavior tonight.
This year, the Gotham Gazette was given the honor of hosting the Pulitzer Prizes. And since Bruce and Wayne Enterprises donated quite a large sum of money to the Gotham Gazette, they felt inclined to invite him.
Bruce had every intention of skipping, until he found out that Lois Lane was receiving an award and Clark would also be attending.
He figured the least he could do was congratulate her and say hi to both of them.
That’s why he was trying to find them as soon as possible so he could and get the hell out of there.
Bruce finally spotted Clark talking to a woman whose back was to him. All he saw of her was the black dress and y/h/c hair.
He made his way over.
Clark noticed him when he was a few feet away.
“I see you’ve finally left your cave,” he teased with a lift of his brow. “I honestly didn’t expect you to show.”
But when the woman Clark was speaking to turned to look at him, Bruce swore he felt his heart stop.
Y/N’s eyes widened slightly, clearly just as surprised at seeing Bruce.
None of this went missed by Clark. “Oh, do you two know each other?”
Bruce didn’t know how to respond. What would Y/N want?
So he hesitated.
“I shot him for a cover once,” Y/N answered quickly.
She was a shockingly smooth liar.
Maybe she got that from Bruce, too.
But she didn’t realize that Clark could hear her heart rate quicken, catching the fib.
“And how exactly do you two know each other?” Bruce asked, recovering quickly.
“Y/N works with Lois a lot,” Clark answered. “She basically refuses to work with any other photographer.”
Y/N managed to force a smile.
“I should actually go find her and say my congrats,” she answered.
“And I need to hunt down a drink,” she mumbled.
Both men caught it.
Clark was rather taken aback by how she fled.
The Y/N he knew was always charming and kind, usually life of the party. He’d never seen her dodge a conversation in such a way before.
As soon as she was out of hearing range, Clark gave a intimidating glare to Bruce.
“Want to tell me what that was about?” He asked Bruce.
But Bruce only clenched his jaw.
“Past fling?” Clark asked with a somewhat disappointed tilt of his head.
“No. Nothing like that,” Bruce quickly corrected.
Not only did the idea make him feel sick. But if rumors started of the two of them being romantically linked, Bruce knew it would only make Y/N hate him more than she clearly already did.
Thankfully, Clark took his denial seriously.
“She’s not my biggest fan,” Bruce added darkly.
“Y/N is a good friend,” Clark told him – almost in warning. “Lois and her have become rather close over the years.”
Then Clark smirked. “She does know how to hold a grudge though. And she’ll make your life hell...if you deserve it.”
Bruce’s brain hurt as he realized how easily Y/N and his path’s could’ve crossed. She had been friends with Clark and Lois this whole time?
“I’m happy for her,” Clark added.
“Happy for her?”
Clark looked at Bruce as if it was obvious. “She’s being awarded tonight, too.”
How could Bruce not have realized? Why didn’t he think of looking at the list of people being awarded tonight? He’d been dreading attending so much that he didn’t even consider it.
“Bruce?” Clark asked with concern.
“Hmm?” He was not one to hum or mumble.
“You alright?”
Bruce didn’t have a lot of friends.
But Clark Kent was one of them. And him and Diana had noticed how Bruce was acting off for weeks now. Bruce was notorious for remaining stoic and giving nothing for people to try and guess what he was thinking or feeling. But they both knew it was something different.
Someone over Bruce’s shoulder suddenly waved Clark over.
“If you’ll excuse me,” Clark told Bruce politely.
Bruce’s first instinct was to leave now that he knew Y/N was also in attendance.
But he knew he couldn’t act so cowardly.
Was he really that scared of his own daughter?
His eyes glanced around the room looking for her.
He spotted Y/N at one of the bars.
Either her conversation with Lois had been quick, or she simply used that as an excuse to get away from Bruce.
Bruce walked up beside Y/N at the bar.
He knew she felt his arrival by the way her body tensed.
“Had I known you would be here I would not have attended,” he told her while looking straight ahead.
Y/N ignored his apology. “How do you know Clark?”
“He’s a friend,” Bruce answered casually.
Then he allowed himself to take a sideways glance at her.
Her jaw was clenched.
He wondered what thoughts she was holding back.
Y/N really did remind him of her mother.
When they were together, Bruce was convinced she was the prettiest girl in the world. He wondered if Y/N had found someone in her life who told her the same.
“Congratulations on being honored tonight,” Bruce offered sincerely.
“Thank you,” she answered shortly.
A beat passed between them.
Bruce was about to give up and leave her be.
“Does Clark think I’m one of your one-night stands now?”
Y/N might not know Bruce well, but everyone was familiar with his romantic history. He wasn’t one to keep the same woman around for long.
“No,” he quickly answered. “I made sure to prevent such a rumor from starting.”
Y/N finally slowly turned to him, her annoyance clear. “And you’re convinced that he really believed you?” She asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Yes, Clark has always been rather good at detecting a lie.” His tone was so confident that it left little room for argument.
But Bruce knew a losing battle when he saw one.
He dipped his head. “Enjoy the rest of your night. Congratulations again.”
But Bruce lingered, debating if he wanted to say what was on my mind.
“You look very beautiful. Just like your mother.”
There was nothing creepy or contrived about it.
Y/N blinked at the compliment, completely taken aback.
“Goodnight, Y/N.” Bruce dipped his head and finally surrendered, leaving the party.
Y/N felt a presence behind her shoulder as he watched him leave.
“Was Bruce Wayne just hitting on you?” Lois asked with amusement.
“No. Not at all,” her tone was dazed and confused.
“He’s a good guy,” Lois told her lightly.
“Doubt it.”
“I mean it,” Lois insisted. “The media has given him a bad image. But I think he likes it that way,” she shrugged. “It’s not easy for him to open up. He’s not quick to trust.”
Lois thought she was building up a possible suitor for Y/N, having not a clue that she was describing Y/N’s father to her.
But Y/N was too busy thinking about how much Bruce sounded like her.
—————
A few weeks had gone by since Bruce and Y/N had run into each other at the ceremony.
It got Bruce to thinking: would he and Y/N had run into each other at some point in life – even without her mother’s posthumously confession?
Y/N knew Lois and Clark, lived in Gotham, seemed to know the same people through her work that Bruce was forced to interact with to keep up his persona.
Would he have sensed a connection had that been the case?
The possibilities kept Bruce up at night…along with the guilt that had already been eating away at him since he first read the later. And he’d read it 100 times more since.
Of all the boys, Dick was the only one that knew of Y/N’s existence. And if he hadn’t been at the right place at the right time, Bruce never would’ve told him. He had just been in shock after reading the letter that he blurted out the realization while Dick was in the same room.
Since then, Bruce didn’t linger in a room alone with him, knowing Dick would finally let all of his questions loose. And Bruce wasn’t ready to answer them.
While Tim was the one to connect them, he never followed through with what the situation was. He already had too much to deal with on a daily basis. Tim simply thought he was doing a nice favor for a beautiful woman.
But if Bruce had told him, Tim would immediately do every possible background check on Y/N. He would be suspicious of the timing and underlying motives. He would probably assume that Y/N’s end goal was to get money or fame – or both. Bruce knew eventually Tim would come to the conclusion that Y/N wanted neither of those things. But it would still get an unnecessary rise out of the boy.
Bruce didn’t even want to think about how Damian would handle it. He knew his son felt a certain level of pride from being the only blood-son of his. Knowing he had a sibling – and an older sister at that – would most likely enrage him. And that wouldn’t make anything better.
Jason…Well, Jason would get a kick out of Bruce letting down yet another child. And it would just be worse that she was blood related. He’d be curious about Y/N. Hell, he’d probably be tickled by the no-bullshit attitude Y/N had towards Bruce and her harsh efforts to keep him out of her life completely.
Now, Bruce sat at a Justice League meeting.
They were only a few minutes into a council session when his communicator started going off.
The boys knew not to contact him unless it was an emergency. So, he quickly excused himself and stood to leave the room.
“What is it?” Bruce answered, his Batman voice in full form.
“There’s been an attack at city hall,” Dick reported back hurriedly.
Bruce frowned. The boys had handled much worse things on their own before. There had to be more to it than that.
“Scarecrow,” Dick confirmed. “He released a fear toxin. It’s bad Bruce. The mayor has been infected, along with half of their staff. I think it’s a new string. Our antidote doesn’t seem to doing anything. Even if it did, we don’t have nearly enough for the amount of victims.”
“The others?” Bruce asked quickly – meaning Damian, Jason, and Tim.
“They’re fine. Jason’s trying to get everyone out before they inhale too much. Tim and Damian went after Scarecrow. GPD is in a panic.”
Bruce turned to see Clark had raced to his side. Clearly he had been eavesdropping on the conversation. But the expression in his face prevented Bruce from getting into an argument about it.
“What?” Bruce asked him, knowing something was wrong.
“Lois and Y/N were at that council meeting,” Clark breathed out.
“We’ll be there soon,” Bruce told Dick before hanging up.
—
Bruce thought he knew fear from the few times his boys had been in trouble. But it was nothing compared to the fear he had knowing it was Y/N this time. She wasn’t a trained vigilante; she was just an innocent civilian. Bruce had not insured that she was trained and could take care of herself.
As soon as Clark dropped them on the ground, they were in the midst of the chaos.
“Lois!” Clark yelled.
People were too distracted to notice Superman and Batman had arrived.
Bruce looked over to see Lois rushing to Clark. He could tell it took all of Clark’s willpower not to embrace Lois from his relief.
“Are you OK?” Clark asked as he dipped his head and his eyes raced across his wife’s body.
“I-I’m fine. I got lucky. Somehow I was out of range of the gas explosion.”
“Y/N?” Bruce interrupted. “Did you see Y/N?”
“She was helping these kids get out and I was getting shoved out of the building. I tried to get to her but it was impossible with everyone’s panic. I think she’s still in there.”
Before Bruce could turn to Clark to come up with a plan, Clark flew into the building. A few people finally noticed the presence of superheroes and started murmuring.
“Nightwing, Red Hood – I’m at the front entrance of City Hall.”
Clark flew back to them not even 30 seconds later.
Y/N was unconscious in his arms.
“Oh my god,” Lois muttered at Y/N’s condition.
“She’s gone into shock. We need to get her to the medics,” Clark informed them. “She was exposed to the toxin more than the others.”
But Bruce was already shaking his head. “They won’t be able to help her.”
Clark gently handed Y/N to Bruce as he explained, “There are others in there.”
Just then Nightwing and Red Hood dropped in front of them.
Nightwing immediately recognized Y/N and his eyes shot up to Bruce with worry.
“Nightwing, I need you to take her back to the cave,” he tried to sound as controlled as possible.
Bruce was confused why Dick hesitated to take Y/N out of his arms.
“Do you have the batmobile? I brought my motorcycle,” Dick sounded apologetic when he explained.
Jason stepped forward before Bruce could answer. “I got her.”
As if she were the most fragile being ever, Jason carefully took Y/N’s unconscious body from Bruce’s grip. He could see in Bruce’s gaze that she was someone special. How and why, Jason would figure out later.
Jason had seen Y/N trying to help as many people before she was completely poisoned from the toxin. She’d risked her life to help.
Watching Jason cradle her into his body caught Clark off guard, always seeing the brute strength and almost animalistic energy from Red Hood whenever they so happened to fight beside each other.
“Meet us at the cave,” Bruce clarified. “Alfred will know what to do. We have to help out here more.”
Jason nodded before he hurried away with her and rushed to his hidden car.
——————
Y/N’s eyes snapped open and she shot up, sitting in a cot.
“Hey, hey, hey,” a voice she didn’t recognize said beside her. “You gotta relax.”
She turned to see a mammoth of a man sitting beside her, wearing vigilante gear with at least two guns being displayed at his sides. But it was the red helmet completely hiding his face and true voice that made Y/N feel uncomfortable.
“What the fuck,” she groaned at the sight of him.
Just a few seconds later, two men rushed into the room.
Bruce walked in still in his Batman uniform, but without his cowl – to Jason’s shock.
Clark was beside him, making Jason confused as to why he was still here. Surely he would want to be with Lois.
Y/N took in the sight before her.
“You were poisoned with a new strand of Scarecrow’s toxin,” Superman explained.
Y/N had seen plenty of pictures and shaky video of him. But now that the man stood before her, she immediately recognized him.
“Clark?” She gasped.
He didn’t say anything. But his expression didn’t fight her realization, just silently waited for the truth to settle.
“Does Lois know?” Was her next question.
Clark smirked at that. “Of course.”
Y/N gave a slight nod.
But now her attention switched to Bruce.
The Batman symbol was large across his chest, and his cape was still intact.
She looked around her surroundings and then up at the ceiling.
They were in a cave.
“You’re…you’re…” she couldn’t finish her sentence.
“Batman,” Bruce finally offered.
Y/N’s eyes were wide with panic.
How was this possible?
Now that the others had exposed their identity, Jason felt inclined to take off his helmet. Clearly, it was making her uncomfortable.
The hiss of his helmet being removed caused Y/N to finally look away from her father and to Jason, who still wore a domino mask. But it was far less frightening than the helmet.
“We’ll give you two a moment alone,” Clark spoke for both him and Jason.
Jason nodded and stood up from the seat beside Y/N, and walked out.
Clark lingered in the doorway. “I’ll be right outside if you need me,” he told her.
He might’ve revealed his Superman identity to her, but she was still his friend.
Y/N managed to nod in thanks, but was clearly still shook by all this news.
Bruce very slowly made his way to the chair that Jason had just been sitting in.
“How are you feeling?”
She shook her head. “Body’s sore. Migraine is killing me. What happened?”
“You were more exposed to the toxin more than the other victims. Jason brought you here. We had to make a new anecdote, and quickly.”
Bruce wanted to add that she could’ve died. But he didn’t see the use in scaring her.
“Oh,” was all she managed to mumble.
An awkward silence settled between them.
“Very few people know the truth about me,” Bruce explained.
Y/N’s gaze flickered up from her lap to look at him.
“I don’t expect you to forgive me. But I figured I couldn’t ask you to allow me into your world if I didn’t allow you into mine.”
She was silent.
“Y/N…” Bruce cleared his throat. The time had come. “The reason I left your mother was because I was starting this life. I pushed her away to protect her. I knew I couldn’t be the man she deserved while also being Batman. Had I known the truth…”
His words died out. It was starting to become harder to control his emotions.
He leaned forward in his chair, just getting slightly closer to her.
“Had I known about you, I would’ve…” He cleared his throat to try and hold back his tears. “I never would’ve abandoned you or your mother.”
He leaned back then. “But I know those are just words. And to you, they probably sound like empty promises for the past.”
“She never knew?” Y/N whispered.
In the few moments she was allowed to process this information, her mind immediately wondered if her mom had known about Bruce’s double life all along. And that’s why she kept him away from her.
Bruce shook his head.
“Thank you…for trusting me enough to tell me your secret,” Y/N finally told him. “I promise I’ll never tell anyone,” she quickly added, feeling like she just needed to clarify that to him.
He gave her a small small, “I know.”
Y/N winced as she thought about how terrible she’d been to him all this time. Now that she knew the truth – the whole truth – she was looking at everything with a new perspective. Even what she knew about Bruce Wayne, the spoiled socialite... it was clearly all wrong.
He used it as a cover. It was all a cover.
“I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you,” she whispered shakily.
But Bruce shook his head before she could even get the apology out.
“Do you think it’s too late for us?” She breathed.
Could they ever find any fragment of a father-daughter relationship?
Y/N was an adult – she had been for years now. And she made it clear she didn’t need nor want a father.
“Believe it or not, this isn’t the first time this has happened to me,” Bruce sighed.
Her brow furrowed. “This meaning…?”
“My son, Damian. His mother kept him a secret from me. She didn’t reveal his existence until he was nine. And she only did it in an attempt to disrupt my life.”
“This seems to be a rather strange pattern in your life,” Y/N couldn’t help but point out.
Bruce glared at her, causing her to chuckle.
“My point is,” he continued, “I don’t think it’s ever too late.” And he cleared his throat quickly. “That is, if you want to try.”
“I think I do,” she answered with a shy smile.
It was the first time she’d done so in his presence.
“I don’t know anything about raising a daughter,” Bruce rubbed his face as he attempted to make the joke. But she could tell there was sincerity there, too.
“Well, I’ve already been raised,” Y/N laughed.
There.
That laugh.
It brought Bruce back to his teenage years. It sounded so much like her mother. Her face lit up just like her’s had.
“You remind me so much of your mother,” he gasped.
Her face dropped at his confession.
“Really?”
He nodded. “She said you were just like me. But there’s more of her in you than I think she ever realized.”
Bruce saw his much his words effected her.
Y/N’s eyes were shiny with tears, but she managed to hold them back.
“So what now?” She quickly asked, obviously trying to distract herself so she wouldn’t have a complete emotional breakdown.
“Well, Alfred should have dinner ready soon. Would you stay?”
She gave him a tear-filled smile. “I’d like that.”
“You can meet the rest of them,” Bruce told her casually as he stood.
“The rest of them?”
He nodded. “Well, you only have to meet Damian now. You already met Jason, Dick, and Tim in passing.”
“And here I thought you had no idea how to be a father…” Y/N muttered with amusement.
Bruce helped her get out of bed, making sure she was alright to stand and walk on her own.
“Well, depending on which of them you ask, they might tell you that you’re right.”
--------------------
Thank you to everyone who read the first part. Let me know what you think <3
BONUS: This Game of Ours
#father of mine#father of mine part 2#bruce wayne reader insert#bruce wayne x daughter#bruce wayne x daughter!reader#batman x daughter#batman x daughter!reader#batboys#batfam#bruce wayne angst#bruce wayne fic#batman fic#batman universe#batman family
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There is such a specific feeling that comes with reading any part of 3tan that I don't think I could ever fully explain.
But I think it's kind of like this part. Like getting together with people you care so much about on a nice summer day. People who you've seen and supported through their worst and vice versa. The 3tan couple feel to me like my best friends who I'm always rooting for because they make me believe in love and that there's someone out there who's exactly right for each of us. Rereading parts of this series feels like recalling stories that never get old or looking back on fond and special memories with friends. It's just such a genuine comfort and each character is so well-established that every time I laugh at their antics it feels like I've known them my whole life.
That being said, I was feeling this so much in this part, feeling like I was there, that the notes I took are mostly just reactions and exclamations lmao. But I feel like they illustrate my point quite well, so here they are.
"Prepared, you bring your weapon of choice to the door: a spoon, slathered with delicious batter, and your tongue in just a second." Lmaooo my eyebrows actually raised when I read that. I always love when OC gets like that but I feel like it also always backfires because Yoongi manages to be the bigger menace somehow.
"A hat, a tank, and the jewelry you love to hate." 😫😫😫
"Except now, your sundress is a lot more revealing than the last. And it’s very obviously covering your two-piece, a new one that you’re only confident enough to wear because of the man standing at the door." Double 😫😫😫. Hottest couple in the world award absolutely goes to them. Maybe fate made them have to hide their relationship for a while because the world is not ready to witness them in all of their glory yet. I know I'm not, and yet I want it so bad 😔😔😔
"But based on all the talk you keep hearing, it seems like the week was long for everyone, so you can deal with the labor if it makes them feel better. With a soft huff, you think that even you yourself can benefit from your cooking at this point." Pls OC is so sweet 🥺🥺🥺
"You can’t let something like that get to you, especially given all the ways Yoongi’s proven himself." So so nice to see OC remind herself of this, the way her mindset is changing is truly awe inspiring.
"If your brother is paying for your groceries, his best friend is paying for your hospital bills." Lmaoooo he really should. What a damn menace!
“Go outside,” Reia gently interrupts while Yuri chuckles. “Tell us what you’re making and we’ll do it.” Cute cute cute.
"Completely missing both rolls of paper towels on the table by the grill." Pffffft. He is so!!!!!
“Both of you deserve to be happy,” she finally says, and you feel a slight pang in your chest. “Out of all the people I know, I’ve always wished good for you two the most.” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
"Shiv is unwavering. “Yeah! Isn’t it heavy?” Shiiiiiv. I love Shiv! But also he's wasting his time on OC because she is way too whipped for a certain someone lmaooo.
“Tae! Wait, you brought”—a squeal flings out of your mouth when you spot Yeontan, arguably your favorite among the two partygoers—“My baby!” Eeeeep the star of this chapter!!!!
“He almost kissed me.” There's something so special about the fact that OC can share these things with at least one person. Because I could totally see how all of this would be overwhelming, I don't know how she's able to keep quiet about it. But Tae really is such a good friend and I'm so glad she has him 🥺
"Even though you’re having a wonderful time, you knew that something was missing. But why does that something have to be in reach and unreachable? Why does having him closer hurt worse?" 😭😭😭😭😭
“This fucking dress,” he rumbles low, fisting a bunch in one of his hands before pressing it to your hip. “Fuck this bet, I’d take you right now if you let me.” Brooooooo. I have no words lmao just 😳😳😳
“Dude. Your back looks fucked.” Aaaaah the line!!!!! I love it when they're put in these situations lmao. It's kinda funny watching them scramble for excuses and get all flustered. It's not as funny thinking about the inevitable confrontation when bro actually finds out one day though. I'm actually surprisingly excited about that, even though I feel like there will definitely be some angst before things get better.
"There was a night where you think you went too hard. But that was after a long ass day, and you knew the two of you didn’t have enough time." 😳😳😳
“And what’s her at.” Fr lmaooo, that's a fair question.
"One day, one day, one day soon, maybe that can happen in this universe, too." Yes, it will happen, it has to 🥺
"You bolt back home, wings flapping in your chest when he drops the backpack and crushes your little hop in one last hug. His grin makes this kiss one of the ones you’ll remember forever, and you wanna etch the way his damp hair feels in your fingers right alongside it." 'bolt back home'... home only referring to the house or to Yoongi too 🥺🥺🥺
“I’m gonna keep wearing them until you pick.” Love love love when OC is like this! I just love seeing them teasing each other and being happy, I hope soon they can do it freely too.
“Okay, well your name is Shimmy right now so do that. In more.” Aaah I saw all the asks talking about Dom and Shiv and I totally agree that it would be a cute dynamic.
"He did love holding the camera back then." I really want to know more about OC and Jungkook's history and I'm sure we'll get to at some point. I need to know all of the reasons behind their break up so that I know whether to keep being endeared by him or not lmaooo.
"Fuck, is that a lollipop?" 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴
"jackson trash [12:51am]: Made it home. I don’t know how I ever stayed out so late, y’all, I am tired! This is ridiculous." Lmaoooo I can't with their screen names.
"The second thought is one you can’t fully explain, but your heart is definitely warmer. It’s almost fact that you can’t be any safer than this." Aaaw I feel the same way after reading this.
"Rinsing soap from your sunkissed arms, you wonder what would happen if that wasn’t the case anymore. If Yoongi could spend more nights here, too, filling a void that has been looming over these walls ever since…" Man, OC and bro really must have gone through a lot huh 😔😔😔 No wonder he's so protective of her.
"Yoongi [2:37am]: You up?" Hehehe I saw that 3tan lollipop is already in your plans and I completely support it of course.
Gosh this was just... it seriously just made me smile the whole time I was reading it. I love all of these characters, I love that each of them has a unique and individual personality and I loved seeing them all together like this and having so much fun. I feel like the next part of the main story line will be a bit more serious, so a light chapter like this full of teasing seems just right.
summer bbq (3tan) | myg
title: summer bbq pairing: 3tan!yoongi x reader(f) series: masterlist | three tangerines | fireworks | house party | basketball | stay | sidewalk talk | friends | dalo | like that | anytime | sundress season | yoongi’s interlude | forfeit | flutter | video call rating/genre: pg13 (18+) ; angst , fluff ; brother’s best friend au, implied age gap au summary: the summer cookout at your place is fun as hell despite the way you have to avoid yoongi looking like sin incarnate. but when he gets asked an unavoidable question, you suddenly feel exposed. and very, very cold. note: this is a drabble for the three tangerines series! undisclosed whether it’s in the main storyline or not, so it’s a standalone for now. also, this is for the person that sent the first bbq message, the people that also wanted this drabble, 🍰 anon for the belated bday gift, and everyone else that is looking forward to anything 3tan! thank you for digging me out of a creative slump and rejuvenating my spirit fr<3 note 2: i have what you call a… proposition for y’all. at the end. ehehehehe see you on the other side! warnings: …this yoongi is just unfair🥴🥴, language, alcohol consumption, house parties, uhhh some food play sdkjlf, uhhhh lollipops lol, jimin is a little shit, but so is yoongi!!, body worship lmfao, tense situations, angst :((, kissing as a warning uh huh, kitchen as a warning you know how it is, chains :))))), yoongi in a tank, yoongi on the phone lmfao, wet yoongi l o l, just all the yoongi’s i fear, shiv raises some brows..?, there’s some rly cute moments in this :’)), despite all the menace-ry loll drop date: march 27th, 2023, 12:30am est word count: 9.6k💀💀💀
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“Hey, Yoongi’s at the door!”
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three’s company | kai & taemin (m)
title: three’s company pairing: taemin x reader x kai genre: smut, fwb request: “hello!! can I req a kai and taemin with female reader smut fic?” word count: 4.4k warnings: MMF threesome, oral (female and male receiving), deep throating, fingering, unprotected sex (don’t try at home 🚫), cumshots, some spanking, taemin has dom tendencies, the aftercare is a bit lacking i think sjdfklfsk a/n: i have not written a proper threesome fic in so long, this didn’t come as easy to me as i thought it would 🤧
at the beginning of the fic—if you don’t know about taemin’s infamous slippers here are some references lol
“Open the door for your best friends!”
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” Taemin’s head peeks through the crack in his front door only a few seconds later, and he grins at the sight of you and Kai standing on his front step, overnight bags in hand. “Took you long enough.”
“We would’ve got here sooner if Y/N didn’t take a hundred years to find her favorite slippers,” Kai says, snorting.
“I can’t go anywhere without them, they’re part of my bedtime routine,” you protest, stepping inside as Taemin opens the door wider for the two of you to come in. “And I am not wearing Taemin’s rat fur shoes as a consolation prize like he tried to make me do last time.”
Taemin rolls his eyes at your complaint. “Rat fur slippers or not, you have no problem stealing all my other clothes.”
“It’s not my fault your clothes are so cozy.”
“You say that every time you steal our stuff,” Kai points out, walking past you both to make himself comfortable on Taemin’s couch. “How many of my poor hoodies are hanging up in your closet, never to be worn by me again?”
“Just the right amount,” you insist, dropping your bag to the floor and jumping onto the couch with Kai, splaying yourself across his legs and the couch cushions. He grins at you like you’re an overexcited kid and leans against the back of the couch.
“You’re so goofy. I hope you don’t plan on having me take care of you all weekend like the last time you ate too much sugar and crashed like hell,” Kai says, tapping his finger on your forehead and making you swat his hand away.
“No, I’m not gonna do that again...I don’t need to be babysat, Jongin!”
Taemin passes by the two of you on the couch and pinches your thigh as he goes; fortunately for him, he’s fast enough to escape a slap from you. “Don’t worry...even if it does happen, we’ll take good care of you.” He leaves with a joking smile as he goes into the other room, though the teasing note in his tone makes you wonder for a brief moment.
—
A few hours later, the three of you are in the kitchen preparing snacks for your movie night—which usually ends up with you and Kai doing most of the work because Taemin tends to be a mess in the kitchen. Kai’s phone pings from the living room, and he leaves the both of you alone to go check what it is. Taemin sidles up to your side as soon as Kai exits the room, and you give him a questioning look when his arm goes around your waist.
“What do you want,” you deadpan.
“Don’t be so mean to me.” His tone is playful, but the lips at your ear are not so innocent. “We haven’t even seen each other in a while.”
“I know, which is why I’m astounded at your inability to keep it in your pants. You should’ve had plenty of practice by now.” Taemin gives an amused laugh, his eyes watching the doorway the entire time, and while the coast is still clear he takes the opportunity to press his hot lips against your neck. You shy away from him, but only because you don’t want to get caught.
One game of Truth or Dare with Taemin more than a year ago had gotten out of hand—a game the three of you usually played together, but Kai had been busy with EXO’s promotions for Obsession at the time—and the next thing you knew, you were sleeping with one of your good friends.
You knew that friends-with-benefits arrangements often ended in flames—you’d seen it happen too often with your other friends and their sexual partners—but you didn’t regret anything about the situation. You both enjoyed the sex, and it hadn’t managed to ruin your friendship, so neither of you saw any real reason to stop. No regrets—except for maybe the fact that you were keeping it secret from Kai.
It was Taemin’s suggestion and you went along with it, though you weren’t really sure what difference it made. He always acted as if letting the younger man know would be too much shock for him to take, or maybe he’d find it awkward to continue hanging out with you two, which you found ridiculous (it turned out fine with him, why did it need to be kept from Kai?) but you weren’t interested in arguing about it.
Taemin looks like he’s about to say something else, but he’s suddenly zipping away from your side just as quick as he came. You see the reason why when Kai walks back into the room seconds later, seemingly unaware of Taemin’s earlier antics. You screw up your mouth and glare at Taemin for almost getting caught when all this secrecy was his idea.
Kai raises his eyebrows. “What’s wrong? Don’t tell me Taemin is bothering you again.”
“When is he not?”
“Stop pretending like you don’t love it.” Taemin pulls out aegyo that makes both you and Kai cringe like you’ve been stung. Taemin laughs at both your expressions, though he’s also a bit embarrassed for even trying to use the cute card on you; you rarely fell for those tricks of his.
Kai shakes his head. “This is going to be a long weekend.”
—
Despite Taemin having more than enough space in his home to host all three of you in your own rooms, you all end up in Taemin’s bed when you decide to turn in for the night. Kai swore he was only stopping in to talk before going back to his own room, but he never left his side of the bed even after the overhead lights were turned out. You lie in between the two men the whole time, enjoying their body heat on either side of you and the comfort of having them nearby.
Kai is already knocked out on your left, but Taemin remains awake, his eyes sparkling with devilment in the dark. He angles his body more towards you, lying on his side, and you mean to ask what he’s doing and why he’s not asleep yet when his hand lands on your thigh.
Your lips part and your mouth moves aimlessly for a few moments as his hand works up and down your thigh, warming you up. “Jongin…” you finally whisper, and both of you know that you speaking the other man’s name is not you trying to call out for him—it’s a warning.
“...is asleep,” Taemin says, unfazed.
“This is wrong,” you mutter, but you don’t make a move to stop him when his hand comes closer to the space between your thighs. Taemin brushes his fingers across your pubic mound as he reaches his hand over to your other thigh, teasing you. “You were the one who wanted to keep all this hidden. Remember that.”
“Correct,” he responds, still sounding perfectly casual about the entire situation. “And we still can, if you just be quiet for a little while and let me do this.”
“Can’t you wait until later?” Your voice comes out strained. When his hand inches closer to your inner thigh again, you don’t know whether you want to ask him to stop for his own good or go further. “Like when he’s in the shower or something?”
Taemin slides his hand fully between your legs now, the heel of his palm rubbing against your clit. “I have to touch you.” He says it like he doesn’t know what will happen to him if he doesn’t get the opportunity now. The tinge of neediness in his voice breaks something inside you and makes you want to relent without a single question more.
The sudden movement of his palm on the most sensitive part of your body causes you to jerk, and your elbow hits Kai right in the side by accident. For a tense moment, you think maybe you haven’t woken him, but then he grumbles and gently shoves you back. “Why are you elbowing me?” he murmurs, and then you freeze when he turns his head and opens his eyes to look at you. His eyes are only cracked halfway, but even in the dim room you know there is a good chance he can see how Taemin’s hand is now halfway tucked into your sleep pants as he begins his descent into your underwear. You stay stock-still as if that’ll make him unable to see you, which feels as ridiculous as it sounds.
“I-it was an accident, sorry,” you stammer. Kai doesn’t respond right away, too busy blinking his eyes against the dark. Then he says,
“If you two are going to do that, go in another room.” He scoffs and turns over, and you’re mortified. He sounded completely nonchalant about finding the two of you in a compromising position, which makes you wonder; does he somehow already know about the arrangement you two have? Maybe neither of you were ever really as sneaky as you’d thought.
“You should join us,” Taemin suggests, throwing yet another wrench into the situation. Kai’s body stiffens beside you, and there’s silence before he faces you both again.
“Join?”
“Aren’t you being a little—”
“Yes, join.” Taemin interrupts you, and you roll your eyes, pinching his arm. “Don’t pretend like you haven’t thought about it before.”
“What does that mean?” you blurt out, jerking your head to look at Taemin. What secrets have they been keeping from you? Kai looks equally bewildered, which makes you more confused.
“I—when have I suggested anything like that?” Kai argues, though his voice is uncertain.
“You don’t have to. You are easy to read, Jongin.” Kai makes a disapproving noise at Taemin’s statement.
“Easy to read? What about you thinking you were being sneaky with Y/N this whole time—”
“Well, I thought we were pretty damn clever—”
“Look, if you two are just going to go back and forth, I’m going to sleep—”
“Fine. Let me join, then.” You want to complain at being interrupted again, but Kai’s words make you pause. And then his eyes drift over to you, his face turning towards yours on the pillow and his voice becoming more yielding. “If you’re okay with it.”
You feel a bit winded, never really expecting him to say yes. But now here it is, out in the open and waiting for you to take hold of it—or shun it away. You also know yourself well enough to understand the second choice isn’t even an option for you. Taemin waits in silence to see what your answer will be, though the corner of his mouth is already lifting in a smirk because he can take a good guess.
“Okay. Then let’s do it.”
With your acceptance, there’s a tense pause as everyone waits to see what the other will do first.
Taemin makes the first move by sliding his hand the rest of the way into your underwear, his fingers dipping down to feel you. You’re not as wet as he’d like yet, which he immediately seeks to remedy by rubbing your clit and bringing his plush lips to your exposed collarbone.
“Kiss her,” Taemin says in between laying kisses of his own across your chest. Kai stays still for a moment longer, and you wonder if he’s regretting this decision, but when you glance up at him his eyes are glued to where Taemin’s hand is moving beneath your pajamas. Finally, he tears his stare away from the scene playing out in front of him and meets your gaze, coming closer to press his mouth on yours.
More often than not, Taemin’s kisses are heated and frantic, as if he can never kiss you enough—which is not to knock his experience or skill, because he has more than enough to satisfy you—but Kai is soft and slow against your mouth, kissing you deeply and intensely like he might not get to do it again.
Taemin laughs quietly against your neck at how you grow wetter beneath his fingers from this one kiss.
Kai’s touch is a little more tentative because he hasn’t done this with you before, but his hands go to the hem of your shirt. He goes underneath the fabric, pushing it up your stomach along the way, to touch your breasts. Your nipples harden at his touch, and he rolls them between his deft fingers. It doesn’t take long for him to begin desiring more contact, and he shoves your shirt up above your chest, lowering his head to take a nipple into his mouth.
Taemin situates himself further down to let Kai have his way with your upper body and introduces one of his fingers into you, sliding the slender digit inside and crooking it up to find that soft spot. You twitch around him, your thighs tensing and flexing, and he keeps his lips pressed close to your hips, biting the skin there and then dragging his tongue across the places he’s just irritated. You’re already feeling overwhelmed at having both men pleasure you at the same time, and you’re not sure how you’re going to make it through the rest of the night.
Your pulse races against Kai’s mouth as his kisses travel to your neck, making you shiver. “Does that feel good?” Kai asks, his voice low, and you nod without a second thought. You belatedly realize he’s referring to Taemin's actions when you notice his eyes have drifted below the waist again. He seems entranced with the way Taemin fingers you, or maybe he just wants a turn for himself.
“It does,” you say, as if your nod wasn’t confirmation enough. Your words trail out of you in a breathless whisper. Kai soon shifts lower down your body just as Taemin eases another finger into you, which makes you moan softly. You think your heart might beat out of your chest when Kai settles himself beside Taemin, and you can guess what’s about to happen.
“Are you going to have her all to yourself?” Kai remarks, his tone joking.
“I was here first.” Taemin grins deviously, but he shuffles over to make more room for Kai between your legs.
As Taemin keeps moving his fingers inside you, brushing them against your g-spot and making you moan desperately, Kai lowers his head and drags his tongue over your clit. You gasp sharply at this brand-new sensation; the sight of it is even more erotic than you could’ve imagined. Kai wraps his mouth around your sensitive clit and Taemin observes closely as the other man sucks and licks into you. Though Taemin sometimes likes to pretend he isn’t as easily aroused as you know he can be, he can’t hide the way his breaths grow rushed and his face becomes more flushed.
The soft but intense sucking of Kai’s mouth and the smooth strokes of Taemin’s fingers have you careening off the edge faster than you anticipated, and your legs scrabble against the sheets as you toss and turn in the tide of a strong orgasm.
Kai comes back to your upper body when he’s finished, leaning in close to where your head rests on the pillow. Your chest heaves as you try to regain your breath. He smiles down at your supine figure, pressing another kiss to your lips. “You’re so sweet,” he murmurs against the seam of your mouth, and he slides his tongue in to let you taste yourself even more deeply.
Between kisses, Kai pulls your shirt the rest of the way off. You end up doing the same for him—with his help—and you run your hands over the newly exposed skin, feeling the soft but firm ridges of his abs underneath your palms. The length of his cock presses against his sleep pants, half-hard and still rising. Somewhere below you, Taemin removes your panties and pajama pants from around your ankles, and even though you feel spent, your body is already reacting to the idea of him pressing your legs open wider and pushing into you.
“Turn on your stomach,” Taemin instructs, though he’s already grabbing your hips and shifting you over before you can do it yourself. He doesn’t miss the opportunity to palm your ass as he does, his digits dipping down between your legs like he’s going to start fingering you again. Some nights, he can spend forever doing just that—pulling you apart with his hands and mouth and denying you his dick until he finally feels like giving it to you.
His plans for tonight are a little different, though.
Taemin taps your lower back and says, “I think you know what to do.” You can’t see his face, but he must be giving Kai a certain look because the other man smirks, shaking his head.
“Come closer,” you say to Kai, because just as Taemin predicted, you know exactly what he expects you to do. You run your fingers up the length of Kai’s strong thighs, feeling the hard muscle of them and bringing your hands up higher to caress the bulge straining against his pants. Kai’s eyes grow heavier as he watches you palm his dick, and he settles himself in front of you with his legs spread.
You could probably occupy yourself all night with pulling reactions out of him and teasing him, getting to know what he likes and making him drip sticky precum down your hand. You are too eager to see his dick and feel him in your mouth, however, so you drag the waistband of his pants and underwear lower to bring it out. It’s thicker than Taemin’s, pretty and tan with prominent veins, and you can only imagine how it’s going to feel once he actually gets inside of you. Kai watches you with burning eyes as you grip the base in your hand and get his dick wet with your saliva, sliding your tongue across the shaft. A heavy, shaky breath leaves him when your mouth makes the first contact.
Behind you, Taemin’s cock nudges your entrance and then pushes in, and you whimper from being stretched while Kai’s dick bumps against your lips. Taemin keeps his hands on your ass as he begins thrusting into you, taking his time with it and building your pleasure up with slow thrusts. You want Taemin to move faster and send you spiraling headfirst into pleasure again, though. You whine with your mouth still around Kai’s tip, which makes him give an answering moan.
“Stop playing around and swallow his dick, Y/N,” Taemin taunts you from above. He angles his hips a bit differently to find your g-spot, and you make a choked noise when he locates it, causing Kai’s dick to slip from your mouth.
“Shut up, Taem. It’s not like you’re making it easy.” Taemin gives a sudden rough thrust in answer to that, and even Kai grins at the pleasured expression on your face and the surprised yelp you let loose.
“Try harder.” Taemin insists, and he lands a swift slap on your ass. It’s not harsh, but it’s enough to make you cry out. “You want her throat around your dick, don’t you, Jongin?”
Kai raises his eyebrows at Taemin’s words, but the twitch of his cock in your hand and the bob of his Adam’s apple are unmistakable. “Can you take it?” Kai asks you, voice thick with desire.
“Give it to me.” You open your mouth, sticking your tongue out for Kai to slide in. You’ve deep-throated Taemin numerous times before, and you are impatient to let Kai try it now. His gaze darkens, and he grips his cock and leads it deeper into your mouth. He shudders visibly when the warm, wet heat of your mouth envelops him. He hesitates for a moment, like he doesn’t want to go too deep and hurt you, but you look up at him from beneath your lashes with your best pleading eyes and he is completely lost to your longing expression. His stomach tenses when he pushes further, feeling the tight space of your throat squeezing around his tip. More precum drips from him.
“Good girl,” Taemin whispers from above, his eyes glued to the back of your head. He leans forward for a better view so he can watch Kai’s dick disappear between your lips, and that movement ends with his hips pressed flush against your ass, his length as far in you as it will go. You moan helplessly around Kai as Taemin continues fucking you at this depth and angle, one of his hands gripping your hip tightly. You feel beyond full, unable to think about anything other than the two men inside of you.
“Don’t come yet.” Taemin pushes into you as steadily as ever, rushing towards his own climax as his breaths grow more broken-off.
Kai groans as your tongue slides sloppily against his shaft, your body being repeatedly pushed forward by Taemin’s thrusts. He doesn’t even have to do much work to fuck your mouth. He only keeps his hand at the back of your head, more because he just needs to touch you somewhere rather than trying to control the pace. The wet and filthy sounds of his dick hitting the back of your throat bring him ever closer to his end, but Taemin’s gaze gives him pause. “You’re telling me not to come yet?”
“You still have to fuck her,” Taemin says, smacking your ass again. He slows his pace momentarily to lift your hips slightly, sneaking his hand beneath you to circle his fingers around your clit, and your body tenses as you give a stifled cry. “You’ve got to feel her. This pussy is so fucking good, isn’t it, Y/N? Want him to fuck this needy little hole? You’re already getting tighter around me just thinking about it...how dirty.��� There’s no way to respond with your mouth currently occupied; you only give a low, shuddering moan.
“F-fuck.” Kai abruptly pulls himself out of your mouth to stave off the orgasm threatening to overtake him at the sight of you looking so fucked-out. Like Taemin said, he definitely wants—needs—to be inside of you at least once before the night is over.
“J-Jong—” You want to beg for him to put his dick back in your mouth, gripping his thighs and trying to get closer, but those attempts are lost when your climax finally comes crashing over you. Taemin keeps his hand on your lower back to prevent you from squirming away from him as he continues thrusting into you throughout your orgasm, overstimulating your already wired senses. Weak with pleasure and shaking, you let Taemin use your body to get closer to his own end, which you’re more than happy to do.
Seconds later, Taemin is pulling out of you and stroking his dick, spilling his cum on your lower back and your ass. He lets go of his dick and slips it between your ass cheeks, thrusting between them and milking himself of the last few drops. He smirks at the messy creation he’s made all over your skin.
When Taemin lies on the bed next to you, Kai sheds his pants and takes his place. Kai gently turns you onto your back and grabs your weakened legs, pulling them around his waist, and you let him maneuver your body as he wants.
When he pushes into you, you almost want to sob at the way his dick spreads you open, sliding deep inside your oversensitive pussy. His eyebrows crease together at how you feel around him, so warm and wet.
Kai’s pace is not as quick as Taemin’s; his strokes are deep and hard as he buries himself inside and pulls nearly all the way out. Your lingering pleasure is stoked even higher by the intense way he’s fucking you, and your muscles feel like they might cramp up, but he keeps your legs spread open for better access.
“Is it good, Y/N? Do you love it?” Taemin asks from beside you, his voice light and airy as if he’s in awe of it all. His hands sneak over to your breasts, and his lips soon follow.
“Fuck, yes.” Kai brings one of your legs up to his shoulder to get a better angle. His gaze is burning as he looks at you and Taemin—Taemin sucking your breasts, your knitted eyebrows and half-open mouth, the sight of his shaft disappearing into you. “You feel s-so good. So fucking deep...” You grab Kai’s arms on either side of you, nails pricking his skin.
“Y/N…” Kai’s voice has grown rough, tinged with desperation. Sweat drips from his face and down his abs. His pace increases, and the tension tightens in your lower stomach again as his hips slap against yours.
Taemin grips your chin and turns your face towards his, sliding his tongue into your mouth in a wet kiss. At the same time, he moves his other hand lower to stroke his fingers across your clit, and this pushes you off the edge into a dizzying orgasm. It’s strong enough to turn your whole world blurry with an endless ecstasy.
When Kai gets close, he pulls out like Taemin did to jerk himself off and come across your stomach, painting your skin with his warm cum. His groans are deep and rich and lovely, and they make you clench with the last waning vestiges of your orgasm.
Kai lies beside you on the free side that Taemin isn’t occupying, keeping one hand on your thigh like he needs to have some part of you always touching him.
“We need to clean up,” you mumble, uncomfortable with the cum drying on your skin, though you’re also trying to battle the increasing sleepiness threatening to drape itself over your eyes like a veil.
“Maybe later.” Taemin throws an arm around your waist and cuddles his face into your neck. Kai grins and nudges his nose against your ear, tickling your skin. Their breaths fan over your skin, and you sigh and close your eyes, contented despite the mess.
“Fine. As long as you carry me to the shower later.”
#taemin smut#kai smut#taemin imagines#kai imagines#kai scenarios#taemin scenarios#taemin fic#kai fic#exo smut#exo fic#exo scenarios#exo imagines#shinee smut#shinee imagines#shinee fic#shinee scenarios#ambw scenarios#ambw kpop#ambw imagines#ambw smut#ambw fic#superm scenarios#superm fic#superm imagines#superm smut
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can you give me muggle jily recs pleaaseeee <3 :D
HOW MANY HIGH-QUALITY MUGGLE JILY FICS ARE THERE?? TOO MANY TO COUNT. *cracks knuckles* BUT I am here for the challenge. Jily AUs are my JAM.
Again, shoutout to our amazing @jilyarchive friends who tag every wonderful muggle jily au they come across. here is the link that will take you to their tags page. You'll find links to specific tropes and AUs :')
I've searched through my own AO3 bookmarks and history tabs, and I present to you 28 jily muggle fics that I LOVE. I am THRILLED thinking about all the good things in store for those that read these wonderful stories. This list took me ages to make because I went through and reread most of these brilliant fics. Happy reading !! xx
properly improper by @lizardcookie
“Marry me,” Mr. Potter repeats, closing the distance between them by striding back up towards the sofa, only to stop and crouch to one knee right there at her feet, looking up at her. Burning. “Pick me,” he elaborates. “Pick me, choose me, love me instead.”
- this fic is the reason why I comment the way that I do (spoiler it's because it's amazing)
The Wedding Ring by @mppmaraudergirl
What is undeniably worse than attending your sister's wedding looking as desolate and forgotten as a wilted houseplant? Drunkenly ringing your ex-boyfriend and asking him to be your date.
- SOBS UNCONTROLLABLY AT THE PERFECTION
Oh my god, they were ROOMMATES by @magic-girl-in-a-muggle-world
Silly one-shot, Muggle AU with Fem!Jily as pining roommates and Marlene as their matchmaker.
- the fic that brought me back to jily and inspired my deep obsession of fem!jily
Swipe Right, Swing Left by @downn-in-flames
The unspoken rule of using dating apps in D.C. is that you always start with where you work.
James Potter, it seems, never picked up on that one.
- giddy just thinking about this gem
'Tis the Damn Season by @petalstofish
It doesn't feel like Christmas for Lily Evans, not after losing her parents to COVID before the Holiday season. She anticipates spending Christmas all alone until a boy from her past shows up and offers her a mutually benefiting deal that has her calling him 'babe' just for the weekend. 'Tis the damn season, after all.
- cries in respect for lyrical writing
Watch Me Unwind by @maraudersftw
Lily Evans hates her job, hates the bigoted customers she has to serve as a bartender at the richest club in the city. But the one person who makes bearing all of it worth it has someone else in his arms tonight. (Rated: M)
- obsessed with the way the plot jumps around the time line in this
oil be there for you by @abby10fanfic
Texting/Social Media AU: Lily and James haven't spoken for 2 years. But that's all about to change thanks to Peter and his involvement in an essential oil pyramid scheme. Featuring boss babes, toxin-free lifestyles, binding contracts, and a very oily journey.
- YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE HOW FAB THIS IS
a matchmaking mission by @downn-in-flames
James Potter has a mission: get Sirius Black and Remus Lupin to finally admit that they both fancy the pants off each other by Valentine's Day.
His partner in crime? Lily Evans, Remus' flatmate, who he also happens to be slightly in love with
- DOUBLE the amount of pining idiots in love :")
about time by @jilyss
'sure, yeah, I can accompany you to that black tie event for your work tonight. wait. why are we on a red carpet?'
- this is my emotional comfort fic, your honor
whiskey business by @elanev91
Sirius Black has a (bad?) habit of picking up hobbies that take over his and James' flat -- this most recent one? Homemade vodka that James now has to try and peddle to everyone in the building.
- hysterical! must read!
Fashion Disaster by @maraudersftw
James Potter is roped into an awful dare by his best-mate, which involves him wearing atrocious pieces of clothing for all days until Christmas as dictated by Sirius. If this wasn't terrible enough, he now has to contend with his maddening crush on the beautiful saleswoman at the clothing store.
- classic hijinks that I live for
it wasn't a pity invite by @elanev91
Part of the December "Winter Tropes" Jily challenge. Prompt: my family invites you to join our holiday meal as an obvious setup and omG i’m so sorry
- awkward Christmas date that owns my heart
spice and honey by @clare-with-no-i
tagging along with her food reporter sister to profile James Potter, London's hottest young chef, is not how Lily Evans pictured her Monday going - especially if he's anything like Petunia’s described.
needless to say, she's in for a whirlwind at Chez Maraudeur.
- I'm one re-read away from printing this out and putting it on my bookshelf.
Waffle Wars by @elanev91
There's only one waffle maker in the dining hall and it literally always breaks. So, naturally, the only reasonable course of action is to meticulously map out when it's working and, ultimately, do a heist.
- the witty narration in this fic can not be matched
You Can Hear It In The Silence by @alrightginger
Lily is non-verbal and deaf in a world where the things your soulmate says about you end up written on your skin. She has known about her soulmate since she was seven, but knows they don't have a clue she exists and possibly never will.
- exquisite, cue me sobbing forever
out the window by @displayheartcode
A new family moves to Ottery St Catchpole.
- everything I could ever want in a fic, forever in my mind rent free
The Christmas Guest by @thegodmachine
An Evans Family Christmas: Petunia is bringing her fiancé and Lily is bringing her…Friend…
- petunia pov that gives me WINGS
Football, Calculus, and Cappuccinos by @moonawrites
At eighteen years old, James Potter has a lot going on. He's a rising star navigating the politics of professional football, the pitfalls of sudden fame, the fallout from choosing his dream over his father's company... and a serious crush on the red headed new barista at his favourite coffee shop.
- I'm still working my way through this fic, but trust me when I say its a GEM
if u like pina coladas by @zephyrcove
Lily is desperate for a date to Petunia's wedding, James has been pining, and their friends meddle ;)
- explain to me how characters can be so perfect via texting fics?
Shelf Awareness by @ghostofbambifanfiction
It's too far out of her way and she's wasting so much money, but Lily can't help but return to the bookstore every weekend, where her passion for good literature has, perhaps, been unexpectedly reignited by the messy-haired, pun-making, rather handsome bloke who works there.
- you absolutely must know that I binge read this and then immediately REREAD it
How to win a witch in 10 days by @adenei
“She’s going to find some unsuspecting wizard, get him to fall for her, and then do all the things that turn men away to get him to break things off! Won’t it be the best way to see what witches do that drives men crazy?” But what happens when the man in question is a blast from Lily Evans's past? A Jily Magical AU based on the romantic comedy "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days."
- fic based off of a rom com? YES PLZ :’)
The Fight Before Christmas by @ghostofbambifanfiction
The heartwarming Christmas tale of Lily Evans and James Potter - two plucky kids who hated one other, until the day they really, really didn't.
- complete sucker for this one
All This Time by @thejilyship
James and Lily grew up next door to one another. Their bedroom windows giving them glimpses into the others life, and also offering prime opportunities to argue with each other over every little thing. They never figured out how to be friends when they were kids, but now that they've graduated from college and are home for the summer, they have a second chance to get things right.
- one of my favvvv tropes
Let Me Love You by @thejilyship
With only a month until she's set to take the throne of Gryffindor, Lily is informed that she'll have to get married or choose to give up her throne. She never thought she'd have to even entertain the idea of an arranged marriage. Enter, James Potter.
- cries in princess diares AU
The Fabulous Baker Brothers by @frustratedpoetwrites
Lily walks a different route home from work and stumbles upon a cute little Bakery with an even cuter baker in the window.
- yes yes yes to embarrassed pining.
Marigold Mornings by @mppmaraudergirl
This is a fun game she thinks, as she removes her hand from his side and reaches up to run it down his chest. He catches her hand in his own, takes a step forward so that her nose nearly brushes against his shirt. She can feel the heat radiating off of him—or maybe it’s from her. He licks his lips and her eyes are drawn to the motion. She knows it is a bad idea, absolutely knows it.
- incredible storytelling featuring dynamic characters :') a favvv
Welcome to Pettyville by@women-inthe-sequel @alrightginger
When Lily Evans accidentally sends a text to the wrong number, she isn’t expecting to find the right person behind it. She can’t stop talking to Prongs. The only thing is, Prongs can’t stop talking about the girl in his class. What could go wrong, other than the number?
- LOVE SQUARE ANYONE
The Kiss a Stranger Project by @alrightginger
“What’s your name, then?” she asks, realizing they haven’t even properly introduced themselves yet. She nervously crosses her arms.
You shouldn’t kiss a guy without knowing his name first.
Right?
- THIS ONE WILL LIVE IN MY MIND FOREVER
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Hey, you once mentioned something about Tom Riddle being a little suicidal. Your new post reminded of that and I wonder why you think that. It’s the complete opposite of what the books want you to think.
Alright, it’s time, let’s do this.
My standard disclaimer whenever we venture into the dark pit that is my thoughts on Tom Riddle: I’m going to say a lot of controversial stuff that fandom generally doesn’t agree with, I will say so much of this shit that I simply do not have time to explain it all, I expect 99% of you to disagree with me and the other 1% to be so horrifyingly offended that I dare to contemplate a world in which Tom isn’t always an overly competent psychopath that they leave me notes telling me to take this trash out of their character tags.
We good? Alright.
So, when I say a little suicidal, I mean that he is suicidal.
Not on the level that he’s going to kill himself tomorrow, or even has plans to kill himself, but in that he makes very strange decisions for someone who desperately wants to live.
And yes, I realize I speak blasphemy given that Tom Riddle’s entire m.o. is supposed to be his crippling fear of death.
Oh man, this one’s going to be so long.
So, my reasoning comes down to a few things:
The location of the horcruxes and the nature of their protections.
The events of Deathly Hallows and Tom’s final actions in the novel
The nature of horcruxes and what it means to not only be able to create one but what it does to you (caveat that I am going to headcanon hard here and speak utter blasphemy)
So, let’s start in order this time, because I think the first two are actually far easier for me to explain.
The Location and Nature of the Horcrux Protections and the Trouble with Backdoors in Security
So, first, the horcruxes are all conveniently located in Great Britain. Not even just in Great Britain, all in places that Albus Dumbledore and later Harry Potter can track down with relative ease, all fairly close to each other.
Now, part of this is undoubtedly attributable to Tom’s overly romantic nature.
Yes, Tom Riddle is a giant romantic, though not necessarily in the traditional sense everyone thinks of. The film “Patton” and its treatment of Patton comes to mind. Tom Riddle is a man enamored by a sense of greatness, of being remembered in this world rather than fading into oblivion, by the significance of places and times in history not only of the world but of himself. He creates an entire, grand, persona for himself because to live an ordinary life for him is to be worthy of nothing.
So, given that, of course Tom places the horcruxes in sentimental locations that have personal meaning to him.
However, it also makes them perilously easy to find and collect.
By itself, this wouldn’t spark my notice.
The ability to destroy horcruxes are not easy to come by. There’s only one basilisk and it’s by chance/Lucius fucking up that Harry gains access to the necessary basilisk venom. Using Fyendfire is an incredibly dangerous thing to do and just as likely to blow up you and the next three towns over as it is to destroy a horcrux. And if there are other means of destroying a horcrux they’re just as hard to come by or just as dangerous.
It’s not quite throwing it into the fires of Mt. Doom from which it was forged but it’s pretty damn close.
So, really, without JKR’s convenient Deus Ex Machina giving both him and Dumbledore the means to actually destroy these things, Tom Riddle’s horcruxes are pretty damn safe no matter where we put them. As we see from the locket, which Regulus manages to collect but Kreacher cannot destroy even after several decades.
However, what does spark my notice, is that the horcruxes can be collected by someone other than Tom Riddle when it appears as if they were never intended to be. What do I mean by this?
From what we see, there’s no benefit to Tom if the original horcruxes are found by anyone. He doesn’t seek them out to restore his original body, they’re just anchor points that should be hidden at all costs. So, he’ll never need a Death Eater to go collect them for him should he be indisposed (indeed, to do so would require a tremendous amount of trust in people he has very little trust in).
So, why hide them in such a way that others can access them? There are canon based options which would have prevented anyone else from reaching them. Given the existence of age lines, I imagine Tom Riddle could make some arbitrary barrier keyed only to himself. There are mokeskin pouches, such as the one Harry is given in the seventh book, which we know can only be accessed by whoever they’re keyed to. There’s the Fidelius Charm which, true requires a secret keeper which Tom would be very meh on, but options exist.
Tom Riddle could wipe the locations of his horcruxes off the face of the map. He chooses not to. Which leads me to believe that, at least on some unconscious level, he wants the horcruxes to be found.
Then we have the protections.
Specifically, I’m thinking of the locket here.
Yes, the protections are very formidable, but they’re also goddamn weird.
Rather than make the horcrux simply inaccessible, kill all those intruding, instead the intruder has to go through a very “Saw” like puzzle in which they drown themselves in despair until they finally get the locket, at which point they likely suicide by zombie.
More, there’s no hint that there’s any other way to retrieve the locket.
Backdoors in security are a very bad idea. What they do is weaken the security as a whole and, if you can take a short cut is, it means that someone who is clever enough and motivated enough can to. Dumbledore is both clever and motivated enough, and I imagine if there was a way to get the horcrux that involved not doing this ridiculous task he would have done it.
More, we’d be back to the land of Tom making sure only he can access the horcrux by requiring a password, keying it to his magical signature, or something so that no one else could get it.
Which means, that’s right, if Tom wants to get the locket he’s drinking the goddamn despair juice just like the rest of us.
What kind of a person would do any of this?
I’ve gone over this before, but I don’t think Tom Riddle’s crazy. Rather, in this case, I think he’s driven by an unbelievable amount of nihilist rage and is also quite depressed.
Tom goes to collect his horcrux, “Ah, it’s time to remember what a miserable life I’ve led and the sheer awfulness of my own existence. Good, I was starting to feel a little too happy. Let’s see if I get eaten by my undead, vengeful, victims today.”
The Events of Deathly Hallows and Tom Riddle’s Death
I think Tom Riddle’s final death in the books was suicide.
Tom takes over the Wizarding World, finally, and it’s as miserable as ever.
He’s trapped in this sham, barely functional, probably very painful body. His Death Eaters are completely out of control and for all that he wanted society to burn it’s now burning and no one’s even learned anything from this. Children in Hogwarts are being routinely tortured and have now staged a rebellion in which he’s having to slaughter them (I have reasons to believe that this is not what Tom Riddle wanted, at all, but that’s best saved for another post), and then he learns his horcruxes have all been destroyed without him even noticing.
There’s so little left of him, he has accomplished nothing, and there’s Harry Potter back from the dead yet again, gloating at him that love conquers all and Tom Riddle will never understand.
And Harry’s right, Tom Riddle will never understand, the world is meaningless and flat to him now and he finally understand that there’s no point to it. I think Tom Riddle decides he’s done. He’s just done.
He enters in a duel with Harry Potter knowing the weird nature of their wands. Now, it can be assumed he used the Elder Wand, but we know they get locked in Priori Incatatum , and that makes no damn sense with the Elder Wand (well, wandlore in general is silly, but I’m working with what JKR gave me here). So I choose to take JKR at her somewhat established canon and say that, no matter what Harry thought, Voldemort was using his original wand.
He throws out the killing curse, despite having now witnessed Harry resurrecting twice to this thing, and within two seconds it rebounds and kills him.
Voldemort’s death is a lot like this scene from the recent, terrible, 2020 live action Mulan (10/10 do not recommend). Now, we’re supposed to think that this scene is the witch saving Mulan’s life and thus showing her hope for the next generation. In actuality, the witch literally flies into an arrow she could have easily deflected from Mulan’s path. It’s a suicide that Mulan is too stupid to notice.
Tom chooses suicide in the most ridiculous, flamboyant, and easily written off manner one can and no one even notices. Instead Harry crows that he has personally defeated Voldemort, with the power of love no less, HUZZAH!
And the castle parties.
The Nature of Horcruxes
I almost don’t want to include this because it’s so... well, I’m really drifting far from canon and fandom now.
However, with horcruxes, there’s always an overriding question of why Tom is able to make so many when we don’t see anyone else with these things around (especially as it’s clear that murder doesn’t simply happen for those that now have horcruxes).
Usually, you have fic authors just sort of shrug and go, “Well, he’s that evil, I guess.” Sometimes you have them go, “No one else is crazy enough to keep going, and that’s why Voldemort’s cuckoo bananas.”
One very good explanation I’ve seen is that it’s because most people, when they murder, feel remorse immediately. The soul split happens, but they’re haunted by the murder for the rest of their life, and thus the horcrux isn’t made. Voldemort, feeling nothing when he kills anyone, is thus able to make them even for when he’s only indirectly associated with the death in question.
However, to me that never really jived philosophically.
Mostly, I simply cannot imagine that tearing apart your very soul is an act of indifference. Here’s how I see it: to do something like that to yourself, you must care, you must care beyond all imagine and human endurance. Your soul literally cannot abide it and saws itself in half, purging what you cannot stand about yourself the most.
The remorse part is, yes, remorse for the act and the victim but more to the point it is the ability to forgive and reaccept the worst part of yourself. That part of yourself that you purged and destroyed, which is nearly impossible to do and might very well destroy the fabric of who you are).
In other words, while creating a horcrux is an abominable act of hatred, it is also one of profound self-hatred.
Tom Riddle loathes himself so much that he is able to do this over and over and over again.
As Tom Riddle goes on he makes himself into less and less and less of himself until he probably doesn’t even know who he is anymore. He just knows, whatever is left of him, he loathes that too.
And then, of course, he gives up, runs into the nearest flying arrow, and dies.
TL;DR: Tom Riddle’s is a miserable existence that ended in a miserable if unintentionally hilarious manner
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