#ALSO I DID NOT REREAD THIS FJDHGFKD SORRY

[rillils]

what side of the bed do steve and bucky sleep on

hallo my dearest nonnie :3 here are some thinky thoughts for you, at least the few I could fit here bc the brain wouldn’t stop producing increasingly ridiculous scenarios lol

before the war

when they push their beds together, which is on most nights, Bucky tends to sleep on Steve’s left side, for practical reasons (as well as the simply, purely self-indulgent concept of getting to fall asleep next to Steve, that is):

one, that’s the side where the window is, and on the colder nights, when chilly draughts will creep in through the crack in the broken frame (that’s been sitting askew since about February ’37), Bucky can curl around Steve’s shivering frame, his chest to the curve of Steve’s back, his arm wrapped carefully around Steve’s waist, and shield him from the cold.

(Steve pretends not to know this. Steve may also pretend he’s asleep when he inevitably snuggles back into Bucky’s warmth, and settles his arm over Bucky’s arm, his hand over Bucky’s hand where it spans Steve’s soft stomach – and if somehow their fingers lace together, filling in each other’s gaps, it’s really nobody’s fault.) (Steve does not pretend he doesn’t love feeling the bow of Bucky’s smile against his neck whenever this happens.)

two, laying on this side gives Bucky access to Steve’s good ear; which is good, because Bucky wants Steve to hear him when he whispers Good morning, always spoken first, always sweetest, and listens for Steve’s sleep-rough Mornin’ in return;

when pre-dawn has barely colored their bedroom in soft blue and periwinkle, and Steve tries to roll away and slip out of bed first, have coffee ready in its pot for when Bucky gets up; and Bucky captures him in his arms, cajoles Steve back into their private cocoon; he wants Steve to know it when he murmurs, Shh, we got time. We can stay a while still. He wants Steve to hear him say it, say we, say us, and he wants Steve to catch the meaning behind it, the holy trinity of You and Me and Home hidden in that one syllable, and feel Steve shiver sweetly at the sound of it;

and on those nights – those nights when Steve’s body opens up for him – when Steve guides him inside and lets Bucky move them together–

when he twists his head back to seek Bucky’s mouth, offering up his cheek, his neck to Bucky’s hungry kisses, Bucky needs him to hear it – the desperate whispers of Please, the breathless praise of Stevie, Steve, Steve, so perfect, drivin’ me insane, doll, the helpless stream of I love you, love you – Bucky won’t let Steve miss a single ounce of it.

now

I think, when Bucky first comes back, being hyper-aware of his surroundings most of the time, the instinct to take the side of the bed that’s farthest from the door is strong, even more so when they’re spending the night away from home for one reason or another;

Steve doesn’t mind. Steve doesn’t even wait for him to ask anymore – he simply claims the door side of the bed for himself, places his broad, strong body between Bucky and the lurking shadows outside and makes a point of tangling their legs together under the blankets. If they want you, he’s said before, his lips sealing the vow against Bucky’s temple, they’ll have to go through me.

this doesn’t guarantee that they won’t, occasionally, wake up on the opposite side than the one they fell asleep on;

mainly in the summer, when Steve starfishes his large mountain-sized self in the middle of the mattress, and then Bucky has to work around him and/or crawl over him (any instances of him elbowing Steve in the guts during this process are totally and entirely accidental) just to go take a piss at 2 AM, and crawling back to his original spot is just too much work (and work means more heat, and more heat means more sweat), so he just plops down in the nearest corner available.

(Things may also get interesting on warmer nights because sleepy, overheated Steve has a tendency to chase after Bucky’s metal arm like it’s the holy grail and he’s stuck in an abridged episode of Monty Python, which is why sometimes – but don’t tell anyone – sometimes Bucky detaches the prosthetic from his shoulder, sticks it in the fridge for a couple of hours, and then leaves Steve to hug it like a teddy bear. Honestly, it’s worth it just to hear Steve’s sigh of relief, and watch his brow smooth into serene sleep. It’s nice while it lasts.)

My point is, no matter which side they’re laying on, as long as they’re together, they’re happy either way 💕💕💕