#ALL THE SNIPPETS WE GOT ARE OF THEM FOOLING AROUND AND BEING HAPPY

[itsachocolateslife]

the closer we get to the release date of jjk s2 the more i lose my sanity

[arkhammaid]

i'm curious.. you mentioned that you have many drafts, which would you love to finish? (and maybe post)

literally all of them-

no but seriously. i have a few favorites amongst my ideas which have been written out by a few sentences/paragraphes and just have been stuck like this forever because i just... dunno. don't have enough brainpower to fully write the idea out

much much yapping about some of my fic drafts rotting on the fic graveyard below the cut <3 i warned you... i wrote so much...

f1 fic drafts

son of helios!oscar

this fic is a weird mix between greek mythology and... my love for oscar. basically, oscar's biological father is helios, who, unlike the greek gods, still exists because he IS the sun. his mom did some praying (unintentionally) and asked for a son. helios gave her one. he is also a very present father and also loves oscar's sister's like his own children. yada yada, some background history of oscar's childhood and speculation of the grid about this unknown man who always seems to be around oscar but isn't a family member (can you tell... i'm a whore for outsider pov)

logan/max time travel fic

you guys know these drafts exist, so you should also know that these are just... existing and not doing much more. lol

omega!charles x omega!max

this is... just. brain barfed onto paper, i literally have snippets of outsider pov (ollie, alpha's on the grid, some chat snippets), and a cringe attempt to get back into smut writing... i have failed btw

dc fic drafts

bruce wayne x slade wilson

okay now this one... jason is slade's kid, dies and due to this, bruce finds out slade is actually his father, not willis. (yada yada, someone with an s being in willis' phonebook... it's all connected). bruce, the honorable fool he is, finds slade and brings him the news. slade is.. well, mad, because 1. his kid died and 2. his kid got treated like shit. slade really gets into bruce's head, and it's very much rancid vibes. in the end, bruce aka batman still doesn't kill, but everyone knows that deathstroke does... yeah.... and then jason comes back and is in for a surprise....

damian wayne discovers fanfic

oh boy... this one is a total brainrot. basically, damian spends too much time on his phone and discovers ao3, wattpad, tumblr, etc. he becomes a minor celebrity on tumblr due to his... damianess i would say. bruce tries to cut down his screentime, damian is not happy and as revenge he writes a superbat fic. and then, everytime someone makes him mad, he writes a fic about them. yeah. i have nothing to say for myself

fem!slade wilson x jason todd

a 5 + 1 fic, where jason discovers not only his mommy issues but also the fact that he has a massive competency kink. of course. i have written one out of the six parts

fem!jason, red hood!jason, arkham knight!jason

basically... fem!jason and ak!jason end up in rh!jason universe, they're like "okay we're triplets now" because they've all suffered beneath the same people. it's just pure chaos. as of now, they've already claimed they're clones of either lady shiva, deathstroke, batman or wonderman (with a dash of constantine because how else can you explain the magic swords) and everyone is left scrambling to actually find out if they're their clones. in the end, slade claimes them as his kids, because they were like "we will fight against you and if we win, you're our father" and he was just too amused by it. as you can see, it got crack

game of thrones

time travel robb that somehow became a girl

girl!robb thinks for the longest time, that her 'memories' of boy!robb are a warning of the gods. she has a mental breakdown before the weirwood tree and accidentally makes a blood offering. yada yada, she claims her own wolves, has some ravens as pets. important tho, the whole north is ready for her to become the next lady stark, since for the longest time, she only had sisters and no brothers. ned sees how special she is and gets approval of robert for girl!robb to become the next warden of the north. due to this, he prepares her much better. the south of course, is mad about it, but they can't do shit. meanwhile the old gods continue to torture girl!robb with visions of the future, if she doesn't keep her family north...

greek mythology in the north

basically, the old gods exist but they have the names of the greek gods. people of the north guard their religion more, targaryens grow obsessed with it, once they find out the starks own the winter crown smithed by hephaistos, from the sword and heart of the night king. which can't be true, because obvs someone from their line would defeat the night king (they forgot hephaistos is technically a fire god... yeah not really smart of them). just some ramblings about the south viewing the north as barbarians, while the north is just chilling

crossovers

sansa stark x jason todd

jason dies again, the old gods drag him through the multiverse or whatever (very murky explanation on how he ended up in westeros) and he swears fealty to sansa, when she was stuck with ramsay. i have actually gotten pretty far, but i'm stuck on where the starks search for alliances and end up going to dany for dragonglass. jason is also a son of shiva in this one, because why not

fem!jason todd x marvel

something something along the lines of jason always having potential, be it as robin, as assassin, as monk, as priest, as someone practicing magic in every universe. and in one universe dr. strange comes across jason and takes her in

bruce wayne x sung jinwoo

universe hopping, jinwoo claims bruce as his and that's it. it's well known that robin has a pet monster that looks like a giant ant and everyone in the universe knows that batman is the beloved knight of death. do with that what you will

jjk x genshin impact

yada yada, more universe hopping, megumi ends up in mondstadt, gets a hydro vision and learns the art of healing from barbara. people assume he's from inazuma, and think his father has left the clan due to the war. he does the same thing as the traveler, and just goes around in teyvat. i've gotten until liyue (and zhongli almost wanting to kill megumi because he sensed 'dark' energy from him, similar to the abyss)

got x peaky blinders

the northern nobles somehow end up in the modern world right during the ww1. i don't have much here, only specific scenes. like arya and lyanna mormont walking around with a gian dog (nymeria) and playfighting each other, while tommy is taking a double take at jon snow (who let his hair grow out and looks a bit like a woman from afar so pretty he is) because he has a sword on his back. don't ask me what was going inside my brain, i don't know myself

percy jackson x jason todd

percy has to marry someone or else becomes a god, since he's already a prince of olympus. since annabeth died due to plot reasons during the war, percy goes on search for a mortal to marry. but because gods are assholes, this mortal has to be someone. he comes across red hood who has ties with the all caste and is not immortal, so he is someone to respect. percy approaches jason by offering protection if he would ever need it. they marry, batfam doesn't know, and while they're not in love, they're friends (yes, they will fall in love, why wouldn't they)

jason todd x deamon targaryen

honestly i'm trying to decypher my own notes to this, but basically, jason founds his own assassin group, going around saying he comes of the al ghul family. no one in westeros/essos knows who this is, and he's like, well obviously we wanted it that way. daemon comes across him, has bi panic, they fuck. daemon finds out jason is magic (as in has magic sword and his wounds heal on his own) while jason gets creative with his english master and yaps about the al ghuls being demons and dragon slayers. daemon gets obsessed, while rhaeneyra is on denial because no, he can't be a sword swallower. now i would like to quote a note on this document "jason is very manipulative, fully knowing he can never let daemon run to rhaeneyra in order to prevent war (he's just delulu and likes his dick)". wow, no notes, 10/10, i don't even know if i meant for jason to have knowledge of this world???

[dumbass-tumbler-cryptid]

Could you post a slightly longer snippet? (How are you feeling? I hope you're feeling a little better)

Sure! Since I just talked about drunk!Spider here’s a snippet of that from Cabin.

And thank you for asking! I’m starting to get better but I’m still not fully there yet. This is probably a little tmi but when I was at the peak of being sick I was coughing up junk about the size of a frog and just as green. Now it’s more the size of a dime so improvements. Also I went a good two weeks of barely being able to speak my chest was so constricted. Now my voice is almost back to normal but I still get choked up if I get a little too loud. So yeah still recovering, and very tired but I am on the mend thanks to all the medicine I’m on.

Enjoy the snippet! 💕

****************************************************************

While he sipped on a bottle of Sprite the adults around him all drank beer. It was fine at first, Miles easily making conversation with his relatives, laughing with them, having a good time. But as the party wore on the heavier drinkers in the bunch started to show the effects of their alcohol.

“Psstt…M.J” Lyle loudly whispered. He was red faced and slightly unsteady on his feet. “You want to try one?” He held out a beer for him.

Truthfully the answer was yes. He was curious to know how alcohol would affect him. But he didn’t take the offered drink. “I don’t know if Pa…”

Lyle rolled his eyes. “Hey Colonel!” Pa looked up with a start, having been in a deep conversation with Uncle Ja.

“What!” He hollard annoyed.

“Can I give M.J his first beer?”

Pa sighed, “does he want to try it?”

Lyle looked at Miles prompting him to answer. “Sure, I guess.”

Pa threw his arms up. “Fine then. If y’a end up likin’ it you can have two more then you’re done. Got it.”

“Yes sir!” Lyle eagerly handed him his first beer. Miles tentatively took a sip. It tasted like carbonated bread. He didn’t love the drink but he didn’t hate it either. After a few swigs he got used to the taste, downing the thing like nothing. Mansk handed him another, along with a burger, telling him to, “always eat something when you drink.”

The burger tasted so good too. The best he’d ever had, hands down. He was feeling so incredibly happy, not a thought in his head as he continued to eat and drink. His relatives suddenly seemed to find him much more entertaining, all of them crowding around him, making pleasant conversation, but with an underlying feeling that they were waiting for something. Too soon, his second beer was gone, Uncle Fike supplying him with another. His last one. Or at least the last one Pa said he could have.

When no one was looking he snuck his fourth drink out of a cooler. Then later a fifth. And a sixth. “Miles….” Pa called, giving him a hard questioning look.

Miles was unfazed. Grinning from ear to ear he approached his father, wobbling slightly as he went. “Yeah.”

“You’ve been nursing that beer for a mighty long time”

Miles rocked back and forth on his heels, twisting a lock of hair around his finger. “Sure have.”

Pa snatched up the hand that was playing with his hair, holding him securely by the wrist. “And how many drinks have you had?”

He shrugged, “how ever many you said I could have.”

His father grunted, “and how many was that son?”

“Aaahhhh ….six.”

Pa sighed, pinching the bridge of nose. He cupped his son’s face in both of his hands, studying him. “Eh, you're not that drunk. You're just acting a fool because it’s your first time. I’ll let it slide since this is your party. But you best believe we are going to have a talk about you disobeying me, got it?”

Miles gave him a heavy, clumsy nod, then stumbled into a hug. “Thanks Pa.”

His father chuckled, returning the hug. “Guess you’re a cuddly drunk.”

[little-peril-stories]

Whumptober 2023, Day 8: "I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier."

Whumptober 2023 Masterlist

Read at your own risk! They're only snippets of a larger story, with no resolution that will be posted online anytime soon; they are being posted out of order; and the characters don't have names. Enjoy!

Contents: angst, death, murder, arrest, vicious rumours/false accusations

Previous | Masterlist | Next

Word count: 1250 || Approx reading time: 5 mins

"I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier."

Teaser: And to be safe, she needed to be free—far from the man who’d taken her away because he believed he could, that his royal blood made him all-powerful, that he deserved to have his fists curled tightly around anything or anyone he pleased. He’ll never let go, she’d said. He’ll never give up.

"I'll never be a hero who all the citizens adore / But if I hide to save my life, what has my life been for?"

The scholar watched her go.

He watched her vanish, watched her wide eyes shimmer with tears as she made her escape.

Met her gaze when, for the most agonizingly beautiful instant, she looked back.

And then was gone.

“I’ll distract him,” he promised. Breath stuttering in his chest, he wrapped his arms around her and wondered if she could feel how his heart thundered against her shivering form.

“Come with me,” she whispered. “Please. But we have to go. Now.”

We have to go. Away from here, away from the castle, away from the place that had turned her visit from a holiday into hell.

He wanted to. Oh, how he wanted to say yes, to let her cling to him—and to let himself cling back—for all of eternity, to let centuries pass them by in perfect harmony and happiness. He wanted to. He wanted her.

“I don’t want to go without you,” she said, squeezing more tightly.

He needed her.

He needed her safe.

And to be safe, she needed to be free—far from the man who’d taken her away because he believed he could, that his royal blood made him all-powerful, that he deserved to have his fists curled tightly around anything or anyone he pleased. He’ll never let go, she’d said. He’ll never give up.

That she had escaped his grasp on her own was a miracle.

If he finds me again, he’ll never let me leave.

So the scholar pulled away, clasping her hands as their bodies peeled apart, loath to put any cruel, miserable distance between them, yet knowing he had no choice. He made his promise again. “I’ll distract him.”

Of course, she knew; she must have; she knew him inside and out; she knew his very soul. He was no soldier, no fighter. “What—what are you going to do?” Her fingers tightened, still tangled in his. “They think you’re the one who—”

“I know.”

“They think you killed me.”

“I know.”

She shook her head, those fragile bird’s-wing bones trembling against his. “Please don’t—You can’t—”

“I’ll just distract him long enough for you to run,” he said. Tugged his hand free. Brushed a lock of hair from her dirt-streaked cheek, relishing the silken smoothness of her skin for what was sure to be the very last time. “Then I’ll—I’ll run. I’ll find you.”

Empty words, a hollow promise, a vow of nothing.

“But they think you did it,” she said again, echoing the rumours, the warnings that had been circling him for days, the words that would haunt his memory for the rest of his life. “They’ll arrest you. They’ll kill—”

“They won’t.” He did not know if that was true. “I can’t let him hurt you again. I won’t.” Overcome with too many thoughts, too many fears, too many jabs of paralyzing terror that would conquer him if he allowed it, he drew her close again. One final embrace.

Against him, she shuddered.

“I will find you,” he whispered, despising himself for the lie. He wrapped his coat around her to hide her stained and ripped dress, almost unrecognizable from its former loveliness. Why hadn’t he thought to give it before? “Now. Run. Please.”

“Don’t get hurt,” she said. There were tears on her cheeks. Why? He wished she wouldn’t weep for him. He was a liar and a coward, a fool who’d spent an entire lifetime quailing at conflict and lying to himself. To the end, he knew, those things were what he would remain, even as he did this, this preposterous thing, this stupid but courageous but illogical but selfless thing.

Nothing but a coward.

I love you, he was supposed to say, sealed with a kiss that contained everything that swelled inside him but which he could not put into words. Instead, he said, “Run.”

The scholar watched her go.

***

He was no fighter, but he was a magicwielder, and he was in love with a girl who everyone else believed was dead—who, they believed, he had murdered in cold blood.

He could not protect his reputation, but he could protect her.

He saw the looks, the gazes that turned from confusion to suspicion to astonishment. As recognition flashed across their faces.

I’ll distract him.

But the soldier—who was supposed to see him and, bound by duty, arrest him for his supposed crimes—kept walking, even as those he commanded realized that a wanted man was in their midst.

The commander would find her. He was looking for her, and she could not outrun him. He would find her and bring her back to the prince, and they would lock her away, shut her up in the dark. A girl of leaves and sea air and sunlight, and the prince and his commander would keep her until she wilted and died.

He would use her, she’d choked against his shoulder. She had something they wanted, something she’d kept hidden from everyone, something they’d discovered and were unwilling to relinquish.

No. The scholar wouldn’t allow it. If she wanted to hide, she must have had her reasons.

If he let the prince take her away and hurt her some more…

He wouldn’t forgive himself.

Never.

He raised his hands, magic crackling at his fingertips, and he froze the commander in his tracks. Although he saw the man begin to shake and his eyes to bulge in confusion, other images overtook his senses: her gleaming tears, her torn dress, her bruised wrists.

Her teasing, pealing laugh, the ethereal whisper of her hair against his fingers, the musical sweep of her bare feet through fragrant, luscious grass.

He unleashed his magic and watched the soldier stiffen, as if his bones would crack and shatter. He halted. He fell.

“Commander!”

Shouts from far away.

“Commander?”

And then—

“It’s—it’s him! There!”

He was discovered now for the act he was committing, but the scholar knew he could not run. He was weak. A coward. A liar.

Words flowed over him, words he knew he should heed, but he had to stop the commander from getting up again, had to keep the attention on him, had to make sure she got away.

“Commander!”

“Don’t move!”

“He’s magicwielding!”

“Someone stop him!”

“Sir!”

“Stand down!”

“Commander!”

“He’s not breathing!”

“Get him!”

“He’s dead!”

The scholar released his hold, sudden dread coursing through his blood.

Dead?

No.

No.

He hadn’t wanted to—

I’ll distract him. Run. Please.

A diversion, an opportunity.

That was all he—

“I said, he’s dead!”

How?

The scholar stared down at his hands, hands that had never before wielded power strong enough to do what he had just done.

A crowd pressed in around him—too many, too many. Someone knocked him to the ground, and as his glasses went flying and the world turned to a soft watercolour blur, he was awash in shattering pain and biting terror.

“You killed him!” someone roared. “You killed the commander!”

“N—no.” It couldn’t be true. But they’d said. He hadn’t. But they’d screamed it out. He’s dead, he’s dead. But he was a coward, and he was weak. You killed him. But he couldn’t have. “I didn’t—”

“He’s dead, you murdering bastard!”

I wasn’t trying to—

Noise rose around him, furious and panicked, coalescing into one thick wall of sound. Words and words and words and screams and words and bellows, so many voices, too many, too much. Nonsensical. Foreign. Commander. Magic. Him. The girl. Dead. Dead.

Under arrest.

Murderer.

Dead.

Doomed.

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[look-at-the-soul]

WIP FILENAMES TAG

Thank you so much for the tag @there-goes-thefighter 🥰

Rules: reveal the titles of the documents in your wip folder and tag as many people as there are documents. Let others ask questions about the ones that interest them and post snippets or explain the contents as you see fit!

Here is my WIP:

✨ Lenny Miller series “The Runway” (Part 6) request by @l1-l4

Y/N and Lenny go away for a couple of days after rumors are leaked in the press. He just knows the perfect place to hide and provide Y/N with some privacy. Things will soon escalate for them in the intimate department.

✨ “Daydreamer” Robert Fischer (One shot) for my Adele challenge song request by @raincoffeeandfandoms

After reading this song is about Adele daydreaming about her former boyfriend who was bi and she was trying to imagine him being “the perfect man”, I got the idea to Y/N being “daydreaming” about how her life would be perfect if only Robert was actually there for her.

✨ “When we were young” Cillian Murphy Special part for my Adele challenge for my in going series “The Photoshoot” request by @zablife

Cillian and Yael go back in time down to the highway f memories, no spoilers will be posted, don’t worry.

✨ “All I ask” Tommy Shelby x reader (one shot) for my Adele challenge song request by @runnning-outof-time

Still figuring out the plot for this

✨ “Love you in the dark” Tommy Shelby x reader (angst request) and I decided to base this on an Adele song as well request by @l1-l4

As Tommy got Grace pregnant, Y/N decides to move on, but Tommy keeps trying to win her back, there’s a battle between what they feel and what she needs to do.

✨ Cillian x reader “Dance” prompt tagged by @notyour-valentine 🥰

He decided to take it slow with the tequila that night, there would be plenty opportunities to get drunk but he got to celebrate ten years of marriage once.

Spotting the beautiful bride among the people around her, he smiled pleased.

“Mrs. Murphy?” He chuckled at her surprise. “May I have a word with the bride?”

And my on going series:

✨Look at the soul- Part 10

“Is this one of those stories they love to portray in movies right?”

Cillian looked at him confused.

“I’ve known you since you were a noisy teen, don’t try to fool me.” Enda adjusted the glasses on his nose. “You have fallen deep for her and I don’t blame you to be honest… I mean, who wouldn’t?”

Cillian’s eyes moved around the theater without locking eye contact with Enda. He remained quiet.

“It’s alright to move on, it’s been a while.

✨“The Photoshoot” - Part 47

“I just found out I got pregnant, this wasn’t planned but… it feels wrong in some way because I know the hard path you guys have been through.”

At first the news shocked him, but he couldn’t help but feel genuinely happy for his sister so he gave her a reassuring hug.

“Everything will be alright.” He added with a smile.

“I didn’t know how to tell you because I don’t want to hurt yours or Yael’s feelings.”

But he interrupted Orla immediately. “You don’t have to feel guilty about anything… let me deal with this.”

Deep down he knew he was trapped between two walls; feeling happy for his sister and guilty of telling his wife while they were trying to adopt.

“Congratulations.” His hand came to rest on his sister’s head in a tender touch.

Bonus: I’m working on a new Tommy Shelby series, but I want to have at least 4-5 parts before posting.

Oops I got carried away, but lately I’ve had so many ideas and I don’t want to have my drafts piled up…

Tagging no pressure: @notyour-valentine @everythingelseisextra @zablife @theshelbyclan @raincoffeeandfandoms

[walker-extended-universe]

WIP Wednesday Game

stolen from @kedreeva

Rules:

Post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can’t share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it!

3x14 August got kidnapped AU

“I don’t need an apology.” He cut his mother off and allowed himself to give her a curt look. “I need to know he’s okay. Try his phone; he may not be able to answer but we should be able to at least trace a location. I’m going to go report back to James so he knows we’re looking at a potential hostage situation.” And also maybe deliver an I fucking told you so but that could wait until he knew August was safe.

He stormed back to the parking garage to find James. “Walker, there you are. How’s-”

“August is missing. Kevin’s also in the wind. I wonder if those two things are connected,” he said through grit teeth.

“Ah, well-”

“Don’t,” he snapped. “I don’t want your apologies or any excuses. I want my son home safely. Make that happen and I might not do something to you that’ll cost me my badge.”

Cordell/Lucia storm

The woman stared at him. “...Right….And who are you?”

“Oh! Right. Uh, my name is Cordell Walker. And you are?”

“Lucia Reyes.” She sat up, holding the blankets to her chest. “I- I’m sorry, I don’t understand how I ended up here. I was on my way into town….”

He nodded and sat down on the other side of the table. “It’s okay. That storm is pretty bad; I’m not surprised you got turned around, especially since you were traveling on foot. Once it clears up, I’ll be happy to give you a ride to wherever you need to go.”

Cordell/Lucia dream

He just wanted to sleep and forget everything for a while. He closed his eyes with a heavy sigh and wished for sweet dreams.

When he opened his eyes again, he wasn’t in his own bed. Or even his own house as far as he could tell.

This dream again. He sighed and rolled out of bed.

It started a few weeks ago. He went to sleep one night and woke up here. “Here” being some kind of weird dreamworld where he was a ranch hand sometime in the frontier days. He’d work with the horses, eat some delicious chili with the family, and then head back to bed, where he'd wake up back in his own life, perfectly rested for the day.

Emily/Hoyt

It was just supposed to be a simple raid. Sure, there was always a risk with his job; they all knew it. But Cordell always came back alright. Maybe he had a scratch or a bruise or, heaven forbid, a stab or a shot wound, but he always came back.

Maybe Emily had just grown naive enough to fool herself with pretty lies like that. Otherwise, that phone call may not have destroyed her so completely.

She tried to shove it down. There was so much for her to do. She had to make preparations for the funeral- his real funeral, not that ponyshow the county was putting on for their Fallen Ranger.

[parcequecestnotreprojeeeet]

Hi, it’s me, Fanfic Anon #2. Based on everyone’s convos about the Papotin's trailer and Brigitte’s potential response, I wrote this piece. I’m looking forward to his whole answer because the snippet we already got is making me melt even if I’m super angry that someone actually asked that. I’ll probably write something after the interview on Saturday, but for the moment …

(PS - to the Anon mentioning the Elle interview, the quote from Brigitte was: “And by the way, Emmanuel was never in my class. Any fool who claims that I used to read his poems and his homework is lying.”)

She was having a great time watching this interview from her spot safely back in the corner with the cameras and the editor’s bank. While she loves her husband, and is happy to support him in whatever way he needs her, including being there for every major TV interview, some of them were a lot more boring than this one.

But that joy came to a crashing halt when she heard him read out the question (could it even be called that?) passed to him on a sheet of paper: “He is the president, he must set a good example, not marry his teacher.”

She couldn’t breathe. Once again, she could feel the hard, judgment filled stares of everyone around her, could hear the phantom ghosts of the years in Amiens parroting their venom over and over in her head until she wanted to run, to hide. It was a trauma that never really went away, for no matter how much the passage of time had dulled their words and the feelings, one snide remark, one snarky comment, one question like this brought it all back to the surface.

“I never taught him!” she wanted to scream. “He was never in my class!” But she knew that just like those comments had been received previously, no one would listen. No one cared about the truth, about the reality.

For his part across the room and surrounded by others who were a mix of shocked at the audacity of the question or giving approving glances to the contents, he was stewing with rage.

“Set a good example,” he wanted to scoff. Where was this outrage when Hollande fled like a coward from his mistress’ apartment with his silly little jacket and helmet on his silly little motorbike? Or when Sarkosy divorced and remarried within a year - his first year in office? Or how about all the secret families housed at the Élysée? Or affairs that kept the President from actually governing?

But he, a man who has loved and has been faithful to one remarkable woman his whole life, a man who has lived a fairytale (at least, that’s how he would describe it), he gets told he’s the bad example?

He is half a mind to lay into the sexism and ageism underlying the question, or to point out that hypocrisy in blatant cutting words. Another part of him wants to launch into a soliloquy extolling everything he loves about his wife (even if that would take ages) just so someone would maybe finally understand just how of a no-brainer it was for him to fall in love with her. There’s even a small part of him that just wants to call it quits right now and storm out of the interview. He can’t keep putting her through this, can’t keep watching people tear them apart, tear her apart.

But he knows he can’t do any of that. So instead, he settles on the most obvious truth he can think of, the simplest way to express the complexity of his feelings, the depth of his love. “Love is something that is stronger than you, and it transcends you.”

His love for his wife is, was, and will always be stronger than him, just like he knows her love for him is, was, and will always be stronger than her. It’s why, 15 years of marriage later, 2 presidential elections and 5 and a half years in office, 7 grandkids, kids’ weddings and divorces, and happiness and heartbreak, but not in equal measure, they are still together, still as in love now as they ever were, despite whatever stupid comments anyone else makes. Their love is stronger than everything (see - a fairytale).

She can hear him responding despite the buzzing in her ears, knows he’s talking about love, his love for her, she can just hear that word love over the din in her head. It’s enough to keep her grounded for now, return her back to reality where there’s still more questions to go and a lunch afterwards.

After the interview, they second they unmike him he is at her side, whispering, “are you okay?”

Smiling softly at him, she replied, “do you love me?”

“Of course I love you,” he answered her instantly, forcefully.

“Then I’ll be okay,” she stated simply, slipping her hand into his with a gentle squeeze. “As long as you love me, I’ll always be okay.”

Helloooo fanfic anon #2! ❤️

This piece was really beautiful! At some point, I almost forgot I was reading a fanfic and not actually my thoughts... or even their own thoughts!

It’s interesting how we all seem to have reacted the same way with that particular question on the teasing video... really really curious about the all thing.

Thank you so much, fanfic Anon #2! ❤️❤️❤️

[yoonia]

Hi Dia ☺️

I love that you’re making content that shares little snippets of your creative process. I’m always interested to know the ins and out on how something is created. What prompted certain things and why. I think it reveals so much about the author themselves, why they choose to explore a topic and how they express those things. It might be silly for others but I find it so so fulfilling to learn about other people and their process in that way!!

I also want to note that (spoiler), the convo reader had with Hana’s Mom was one of my favs too!! I think it’s something reader needed to hear from the beginning… that what happened wasn’t her fault. I’m not sure if it would have had the same impact on her if she did hear it when the wound and grief was more fresh. This scene in particular was almost magical. I have no other way to describe it. But it’s similar to how I felt when I read slow dancing when JK met the girl in Jeju? I think was, when he was going through his crisis. You place certain characters in just the right moments when they’re needed. It’s almost magical, fairytale-like and it makes me all happy and giddy.

And lastly, the smut. Lmao. I really liked this part:

I found hobi running after reader into the bathroom super cute. I was laughing along. But it was this section in particular that… I thought was really hot:

My laughter died along reader’s. Imagining hoseok like that…swaying. 😵‍💫 it when from a cute little fooling around moment to such a spicy moment it gave me whiplash. In my mind I always always imagine Namjoon to be particularly gifted in that area. and know I’m like wait hobi

Anyways, I hope you’re doing well ☺️🤍

Oh, thank you! I do enjoy sharing my behind-the-scenes moments once or twice. Sometimes I'd share or talk about them with my friends but after I first started doing my audio sharing thing and a few ask games about my writing process, I always found it so much fun to share those moments with others. I guess it makes it more fun to show how much I enjoyed the whole process behind the story. For this one especially, there are a lot of stories behind the process that I'm interested to share with those who are curious about it :)

Thanks for pointing out about the side characters and their roles! I feel like we all need that "voice of reason" at least once in our lives to help us think about the pros and cons of our life decisions, and I always thought about how it would help the characters find their way through their conflicts without making it seem too unrealistic. I loved Tasha's role in Slow Dancing even if I initially didn't really plan to give her that much role until I started writing the story, while in this one, I decided to add Hana's mom because we never really got to see Hana's side from the first story. If this part was done in the first story, perhaps the conversation wouldn't help much with her grief being so great, but now that she's open to accepting everything she needed to understand about the past, this conversation seemed to happen at the perfect moment.

omg yes, that smut part!! I'm grinning so wide right now seeing the snippet you shared lol because I honestly think this part was my favourite to write for some reason. especially with that detail *coughs*. I loved writing about how carefree and passionate they are about one another. I don't know, I can just imagine Hoseok being...this person for some reason lol

[alexiethymia]

snippet (res ipsa loquitur)

“Look who’s here. Professor Yang’s favorites!”

Professor Yang raises an eyebrow at that, as if to say that he didn’t have favorites, but Professor Kim Eun Sook pays him no mind. Dear friend though he may be, and though she would trust him with any case, his hard-ass act didn’t fool her. He could say whatever he wanted, but his subtle actions belied his fondness for his once-students turned professionals. Just the fact that he regularly invited them back to Hankuk to discuss cases was just one example.

“I don’t know about Prosecutor Han here, Professor Yang’s protégé that he is, but I’m certainly no favorite when I had to be Erica Shin just to get him to eat with me.” Lawyer Kang has certainly grown up to become a balanced professional, but Professor Kim is happy to see that she’s kept that refreshing bluntness of hers.

“If being Professor Yang’s favorite means additional work like getting called back to school, then I’d rather be your favorite.” Prosecutor Han for his part hasn’t changed much either. Although he’s settled into himself now, becoming as calm in actuality as he sometimes presented himself back in school, that teasing gaze towards Kang Sol A was still present how many years later.

Professor Yang just stares deadpan at what he deems to be nonsense from his former students. “I never taught the both of you to be lax as students, much less as professionals.”

“We’re just joking, Professor,” Kang Sol A – Lawyer Kang now – can easily look her once-savior in the eye and smile, as Professor Yang just raises an eyebrow, “You know we’re always glad to help with whatever we can.”

“We must have inherited your curse as a workaholic, Professor,” Prosecutor Han jokes. Even when he was just Han Joon Hwi, and not yet Prosecutor Han, he never had that fear towards Yangcrates. Frankly, he admired him, though it had always been a complicated emotion with the way all their fates had been tied.

“Ehem. Who would have thought that when I asked you to come hand-in-hand to my office so many years ago as students, you’d be doing it again and again now that you’ve become professionals.” Professor Kim is only half-serious. Even then she’d had an instinct about these two – one with the sharp mind and logic and the other with the fiery heart and passion. They would balance each other out, though she wouldn’t have picked up on it if not for Joon Hwi’s propensity to be a knight-in-shining armor for his then frazzled seatmate.

Kang Sol A mock-scoffs before smiling prettily, while sharing a gaze with an amused Joon Hwi. It was good to see that they still got along marvelously so many years later.

Professor Yang stares long and hard at them as if they were a crime scene he was investigating, before going on ahead and asking Joon Hwi to follow. Eun Sook’ll poke at his thoughts later though she’d be lucky if he felt like sharing them.

“See, you really are his favorite,” Kang Sol A nudges Joon Hwi playfully, while he only chuckles. “No need to worry Lawyer Kang. You’re my favorite at least.” Both Eun Sook’s eyebrows raise at that. With time and his new position, it seemed as if Joon Hwi had gotten more direct, if at all possible. Ah but perhaps, Eun Sook thinks while observing how Kang Sol A just laughs in response, rather than time it was circumstances that forced him to change his approach.

A slight movement behind Professor Kim’s desk catches all of their attention, and a doting smile appears on Eun Sook’s face.

“Aigoo. Is this your daughter Professor Kim?” Kang Sol positively beams at the small curly haired girl hiding shyly behind the Professor’s desk. She was so adorable! It reminded Sol of Byeol when she was at that age. Looking sideways, she sees Joon Hwi sporting an equally wide and fond smile. It was no wonder. With how he was with her younger sister, first when they’d met and until now, Kang Sol surmised that he must be ridiculously fond of children as well. Distantly she thinks that he’d be a wonderful father someday, although uncharacteristically cynical, she also has to admit that she doesn’t exactly have any good bases for comparisons.

“Yes,” Professor Kim says, proud, like all mothers are, “Say hi to oppa and unnie here. They work with the law just like mommy.”

Funnily, it’s a race between them for the privilege of lifting Professor Kim’s daughter up in their arms, but Joon Hwi lets her win (much like he always does). Kang Sol A openly cooes, while Joon Hwi hovers closely to the both of them, also introducing himself to the young girl.

It’s such a heartwarming sight that Professor Kim almost wants to take a picture of it, even if it would be inadmissible as evidence later on.

They’re momentarily interrupted when someone enters the legal clinic.

“Ah Miss, it’s so wonderful to see you again.”

“Ahjumma!” Kang Sol exclaims happily upon seeing the lady who ran the Bad FaMa website enter the legal clinic. Seamlessly, she adjusts Professor Kim’s daughter on her hip, before transferring her to Joon Hwi who carries her on his arm. “How are you? What are you doing here? It’s not another defamation case is it,” Kang Sol asks worriedly. Of course, she’d defend her properly this time since she was now a full-fledged lawyer, not only giving half-baked assistance and having to rely on Joon Hwi because she wasn’t prepared yet.

“Ah no, no need to worry Miss – ah my mistake, it’s Lawyer Kang now isn’t it? You sure showed them didn’t you.” She smiles warmly, proudly, at Kang Sol, and Kang Sol gets happy flutters in her heart and stomach, “I volunteer here at the legal clinic sometimes. Professor Kim has been helping me out with lobbying for stricter child support laws, and the other lawyer who volunteers here - Lawyer Jeon - has been helping me with cases of single mothers. She’s been telling me all about you. I’m really glad to see you doing so well.” Though it’s been a while since Kang Sol has seen her – since when she was still a law student in fact – the older woman and that case will always hold a special place in her heart. She considers it as her first case, and though it did cause a slight rift between her and Joon Hwi, she had been the first person outside of smug Second Judicial Exam Passers and terrifying law professors who had genuinely thanked her for the legal service she provided. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that Kang Sol owes a lot to her for reigniting her reason for studying law in the first place.

“And Prosecutor Han, I’m delighted to see you’re doing great as well.” Joon Hwi inclines his head at her while responding in kind. Even with a child on his arm, he looks every bit the respectable Prosecutor, and Kang Sol could sometimes shake her head in amused resignation at how flawless her – (Friend? Best friend? Family?), - at how flawless Joon Hwi is. She shakes her head for a different reason this time around, to get rid of that brief interruption in her mind.

Ahjumma smiles, full of maternal care. “What a lovely daughter,” Joon Hwi and Kang Sol exchange wordless glances and smiles, fully agreeing with her assessment – Professor Kim’s daughter with her soft curls, and shy and polite demeanor really was just too cute for words, “the both of you two have,” – before freezing in their tracks.  

Ajhumma seems not to notice the slight disturbance in the force, nor Professor Kim’s silent but far from inconspicuous chuckles, since she goes on, “Perhaps I’m just biased, but I’d always thought that the both of you suited each other well, even back then. And to see the both of you with a daughter of your own makes me really happy. We have enough parents who abandon their kids, but I know you would be such loving parents who would do everything and anything in your power to protect your daughter.” She grasps Kang Sol’s hands in her own and says sincerely, “Congratulations to the both of you.”

Prosecutor Han for all of his brilliance in court seems for the first time at a loss for words. It was a misunderstanding yes, but a reasonable one in Eun Sook’s mind. She would have probably thought the same, and yet for all that Eun Sook imagines they’ll just brush this off and regain their easy momentum, the pause lasts far too long this time around, and Professor Kim suddenly worries.

Kang Sol is frozen, and looks to be a million miles away. It’s to the point that the woman grasping her hands finds her smile slowly falling. There are no flustered denials, nor a hint of red anywhere. Kang Sol is blank, and this worries Professor Kim since the younger girl has always been full of life, of emotion, and to see this is disconcerting. Joon Hwi sees her from the corner of his eye, and Professor Kim is suddenly transported back to that Civil Code classroom so many years ago, for he once again saves her from having to answer, as always reliably following-up after her.

He slowly lowers her daughter down who immediately rushes to her. Upon seeing that, realization breaks across their guest’s face. “She’s not our daughter, but Professor Kim’s,” he explains smoothly, although it may be a bit redundant now. That seems to snap Kang Sol from the daze she’s in as she energetically reassures their guest that there was no need to worry regarding the misunderstanding. 

Eun Sook picks up her daughter and sends a questioning gaze towards Joon Hwi who seems reluctant to meet it. He smiles that characteristic smile of his, the one that seemed to say that he had everything under control, that there was nothing that could trip him, before politely excusing himself from the room to follow after Professor Yang. “He must be tired of waiting.” He doesn’t rush, nor does he run. Both his voice and gait are measured and paced, and though he catches Kang Sol A’s eye in that form of wordless communication that Professor Kim observed was common to him, her, and even Professor Yang, Kang Sol A seems to break it first to rejoin her conversation with their guest and her.

Joon Hwi stares a little longer at her profile before exiting.

The warm atmosphere the legal clinic had when the two had entered earlier seems to have dissipated.

Professor Kim really cannot help but worry.

[seodami]

Dearest treasure | KTH

|PART1| |PART 2| |PART 3|

Summary: Every kid in town was afraid of Kang Taehyun, the old -slightly creepy- man living alone for years and years in the same run down house. Every night he would go into his backyard with a shovel and dig a hole into the earth. No one knows why and there are kids rumouring about him burying people. Jungwon was a bright kid, wanting to find out the truth behind this widely spread rumour for a school project. And what he found out would change his life forever.

Genre: fluff, angst, flashbacks, story of life, snippets of life, tiny bit humour

Warning: old Taehyun, mention of death, mention of suicide/suicidal thoughts, death

Word count: 10152 (all 3 parts)

Pairing: Kang Taehyun x reader, (Yang Jungwon)

Note: Wow okay so this story took me a while to write and I listened to hours of das music to finish this🥺 this was honestly an emotional rollercoaster. But I’m so glad it’s finally finished so I can post it on here yayyy!!! I hope you like it an enjoooyy (please tell me if you cried I would really appreciate your responses haha bc I did)

Main masterlist

2089 (present)

Deathly silence hung in the air as thick as smog. In Jungwons eyes pooled tears, ready to spill over the edges to fall into free fall and drop heavily onto his trousers. His heart was burning, not finding any suitable words of comfort or understanding for the old man in front of him. His throat felt like it was tied up so tightly, he couldn’t breathe. Oh, how didn’t he know? Oh, how could anyone talk bad behind his back? So much hurt…

Mr. Kangs head hung low, not daring to make any other noice than his sniffling nose. Hot tear drops were silently dropping down, it felt suffocating just watching him so full of hurt and sorrow. Suddenly Jungwon felt sorry to let him relive his whole life together with the terrible pain even the young boy could feel.

“I- I…I never could…forgive myself. It was my fault-“ the once handsome mans face was dark and the wrinkles now seemingly even deeper full of regrets and unspoken words. “You wouldn’t understand, boy-“

Jungwon couldn’t form any appropriate words at that moment and let the sadness let him take away just for a little longer. His story was heavy… he felt like he just heard something he shouldn’t have heard. Something so private and fragile. It had touched him more than he had thought.

“I didn’t want to live anymore… it was all worthless since then… I had no motivation to keep going.” His voice became a tad more stable, yet still quiet and weak. His tired eyes met the innocent boys and for a second the old man could see his younger self inside his big brown eyes. Sadness and nostalgia rolled over him and he averted his gaze.

“I tried ending my life many times since that day- it never worked no matter how much I wanted it… and then I just…I just mouldered…alone, broken- and just a shell of my old self. I wasn’t the once happy, bright, clever boy anymore. I could never be that again…”

Jungwons heart felt heavy, breathing wasn’t bearable. His hands unconsciously reached forward to the tiny lost figure sitting in his sunken mould. It was a simple touch but for Mr. Kang it was the first reassuring and comforting gesture he had received in a long long time. It made him tear up stronger, still staying silent. The young boy wanted to be there for the old man. He wanted to show him that he wasn’t alone in this.

Moments of depressing, yet healing silence passed, just the ticking of the old clock in the dark living room was heard. “I’m so sorry Mr. Kang…” Jungwon finally whispered, unsure if the man spoken to even heard it. He couldn’t do much but be there in this moment. Quite honestly he felt like crying himself. But he wanted to stay strong for him.

“One day-“ Mr. Kangs voice shook a little but he kept talking. “-I remembered the time capsule. My dearest treasure. So long ago. And I made it my life mission to find it. One last moment to hold onto and…look back to.” A thick single tear slowly rolled down Jungwons cheek. So that was it. That’s why… and everyone had dragged the vulnerable man down, putting even more dirt into his deep wounds.

“I-I searched everywhere. But…but i just…forgot. It’s my last wish before I finish this…” life he wanted to say. Finish his life. It made the school boy unbelievable sad. Oh how much he must’ve suffered his whole life. And before Jungwon could’ve decided differently, a strong feeling of wanting to help and support creeped up to him.

“I’m gonna help you Mr. Kang. We will find your treasure.” Jungwon reassuringly took the heavy, wrinkled hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. It was the first time since that day, that he felt hope again. Just a tiny tiny splinter but it was there. Hope.

The next hours, both of the males digged holes through the whole garden, not saving any sweat, too focused on finding the mans greatest desire. Mr. Kang had already reached his limit after three holes, following with the 14 year old boy leading him towards an old wooden garden bench to rest on. Jungwon on the other hand was full of verve and energy to fulfill his dearest wish. To find his dearest treasure. Mr. Kang watched him with surprise and thankfulness, never had anyone gone all the way out to help him with something so important to him. There was never someone who he could’ve went to. After that day, he had broken off all the contact with his old friends. He wanted to feel alone at some point. He deserved the pain. That’s what he had always told himself. But now he was old and weak and just wanted nothing more than to be finally reunited with his beloved family. He missed you everyday. He heard his daughters laughters everyday. And he saw his son running around outside in the garden everyday. He finally wanted to be with his family everyday.

It had already gotten dark and cold at this point, Mr. Kang had brought the hard working boy a jacket and a warm tea. The sun was already long gone, just the small lights from the veranda and from the street shined over towards them. Jungwon was still digging, his once tidy school clothes now full of dirt and dust and drenched in sweat. He couldn’t give up. He knew that. So he kept digging and digging. The moon was fondly watching at the pair below, shining just a tad brighter tonight for them. Short friendly small talk about school went quickly over to heartfelt conversations about life and this and that. Nobody, not even the moon, would’ve thought that the bitter, lonely 87 year old Taehyun and the bright, cheerful 14 year old Jungwon would’ve ever even crossed paths, yet life showed again how unpredictable and full of surprises it could be. This night, a tight bond between the two men was woven. So unexpected but yet so lovely.

The clock already told them it was 6 minutes before midnight when another noice cut through the silent night air. A metallic sound. Gasping, Jungwon threw the shovel away, excitement now rushing through his veins. He fell onto his knees, not caring about the moist soil on his trousers. His hands digged through the last part, brown earth now sticking behind his nails, and moments later, he pulled out a medium sized metal box, securely wrapped in plastic. Jungwon felt like he just won the Olympics, he felt like he did it. He did it…

A quick gaze onto the bench showed him the sleeping old man, now seeming even tinier than before. With shaky steps and a weird feeling of proudness and fulfilment, Jungwon waddled over to the sleeping form, gently waking him up. The box in his hands was tightly in his grasp, not letting go. Mr. Kangs heavy lidded eyes flew open in an instant when he saw the metal box in the boys arms. Tears burned in his thankful eyes, reaching towards it with shaking arms. Everything felt heavy, yet his heart felt the lightest it had felt in a long long time.

“Thank you…so much.” Tears were now unstoppable rolling down his cheeks. It squeezed Jungwons heart, knowing he could make this man happy again, fulfilling his last wish. The both of them moved up to the house again, warmth engulfing them with its now familiar scent. Comfort. The old man reassured the boy to stay but seeing the box being opened, Jungwon felt as if he got to see something way too private. But he stayed, looking over the sniffling mans shoulder when he pulled out a small pink toy dolphin. His hands were shaking. “This was my daughters. It was her favorite toy when she was…two years old.”

Taehyuns heart clenched, seeing all his treasures in front of him. He desperately pressed the small toy against his chest, letting all his emotions in. It was intense, yet it was all he ever wanted. Seeing the familiar drawings of a green giraffe, sitting on a cloud with a family next to it. He could read all their names above the figures. Oh Taehee…

Looking through the photographs, old memories surfaced and made the man tear up even heavier. He didn’t knew how much he really had missed them. It was as if his empty shell was slowly filled again, reliving all of your best and worst moments. He saw a picture on his old friends Hueningkais 18th birthday. All of his friends were there, cake smeared all across your faces, the brightest smiles someone could ever see. The day he had first met you… Another picture had all of your friends sitting around a small bonfire, being cuddled inside blankets. Taehyun saw his younger handsome self smiling unsure into the camera with you sitting beside him. He could only laugh sadly at the memories of your camping trip where he first had kissed you, the guilty feeling just as clear.

“She looks so happy here…” Taehyun noticed with a testy smile, gently touching your face on the picture, seeing you and him laying on a bed, arms tightly slung around your frame, as you held the camera. His large eyes showed nothing but the purest form of love as he looked over to you. Oh he was such a lovesick fool. “You were a pretty couple…” Jungwon whispered, glancing over the handsome young man and the pretty women. He wished to find someone in his life later, he could look at with just as much love as he did. Taehyun nodded, pulling out the next photo. It was the two of you kissing in front of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, big smiles on both of your faces. Taehyun remembered, it was when he courageously decided to fly around half the globe to you to fix your relationship. He didn’t want to give you up, thank god he didn’t. Another photograph showed you holding your first ultrasound picture, tears streaming down your face. You were both so young and already on the way to becoming parents. It was scary, yes it was one of the most scary moments in life but it was all worth it. The next picture showed you in the hospital bed, looking weak, yet happy. Taehyun was kneeing down next to you, his gaze focused on you and the tiny newborn baby in four arms. A tear dropped down onto the photo but he quickly wiped it away. “Our little Taehee…”

The next picture showed a kissing couple dressed in a gorgeous white dress and a neat black suit. The priest between them was smiling fondly at the newlywed couple. On another one he could see the couple dancing in midst of their guests, white petals laying all over the place. Taehyun sobbed, holding a hand over his mouth. Jungwons hand reassuringly squeezed his shoulder. He was there for him. Taehyuns and your parents were dancing next to you, he could see his friend Yeonjun and Beomgyu dancing with each other playfully and many more of their closest circle. It had been so long. And he missed it. It was such a happy memory.

There were other photographs with you being pregnant, both of your baby pictures, your friends and your parents and a ton of little Taehee running around bubbly in her adorable dresses and overalls. Taehyun hadn’t seen these pictures in a while and it tore his heart into a million pieces. The last picture was inside your new house, the house he never could bring over him to leave. You were all sitting on the carpet, smiling into the camera. The little baby boy snuggling closer in his blanket and the girl pressing a soft kiss onto his tiny head. Taehyuns arms were slung around your frame, head laying on your shoulder relaxing. They were so happy. So happy.

He pulled out an edition of your favorite book with a hand written text inside: ‘For Taehee and Taejun- may they find wisdom and happiness in their long lives. From mum and dad’ Taehyun remembered. Oh he remembered everything. You two would always read this book together since your honeymoon, where you discovered it in one of the local bookstores. Since then it had always be your favorite book. And it hurt him seeing his children never got to read it. Their future was just robbed because of one moment. It was unfair. Why did he get to live when they couldn’t? He never understood.

The last thing Taehyun pulled out of the box was the pink letter littered with dozen of glitter stickers. ‘To my love’ stood on top of it in your cursive handwriting. He gulped, knowing exactly this was made for him personally. It was the letter he dreaded reading. The moment he waited for. The reason he wanted to find this box in the first place. His love. Jungwon stood stiff and still next to him, not daring to say a word. With shaking fingers, he carefully opened the envelope without tearing it. He could immediately recognise your pretty handwriting and already teared up when he read over the first sentence. ‘To my dear love Taehyun, whom I always love’ with another nod, he dared reading through the heartfelt letter.

‘So this is where life led us, what? To be quite honest with you, my 17 year old me would’ve never thought about marrying the handsome boy from Hueningkais birthday party, let alone have his children and buy our first house together. Life went wild with us, am I right Tae? But I regret nothing. Not even when I stole your favorite hoodie out of your closet without you knowing. Everyone was so done with my reckless personality and I often felt misunderstood in my younger days as you know. But you just always seemed to just see the best in me. Even when I felt like giving it all up. You were always there for me. And you were the only one to fully understand and accept me how I am. This is something I never told you in person but I can’t remember how life was without you before. In my mind, you were always there and I know that you will always be there for our family in our long future. I hope when you read this, we are both still happily married, watching our children and grandchildren laugh about all our ridiculous photos inside this box. And Taehee, oh she must be so happy to see her favorite toy again haha. Taehyun, you are my best friend, my first love, my first heartache, my true soulmate and the best husband in the whole world. You are and will always be my love, no matter how time will turn our lives around. We are always together. I love you always,

Your dearest wife Y/N

(P.S. don’t worry about getting old, you are still my handsome prince I fell in love with!)’

At this point, Taehyun was a sobbing mess, not caring what the young boy might think of him. This letter had touched his soul, his deepest heart. He felt every word you’ve written just as if it was you whispering each of them into his ear. He never felt the urge that strong before to be by your side, hug you, kiss you all over your face, tell you how beautiful you were and whisper how much he loved you and would forever. His life made sense only with his family by his side. There was nothing left to live anymore for Taehyun. And he knew that for a long time already.

Jungwon in this moment didn’t knew what to do anymore. He felt like he had fulfilled his mission, making the old man happy for a last time. With quiet steps, he took his video camera, he totally had forgotten and put it in his backpack laying on the floor abandoned. It was his sign to leave, let the man dwell in his emotions and memories. He was done here. With careful steps he went closer to the sobbing man again, softly putting his hand on his shoulder. He looked up as if he knew what the boy was about to say.

A small smile was on his wrinkled lips, clenching on the boys heart. He weakly pushed himself up just to pull the sweaty, in dirt covered student into a warm embrace. It was the first hug since ages it felt like. The hug remembered Jungwon of his own grandmother and tears stuck in his throat. He missed her. “Thank you so much, Jungwon. You are a wonderful kid. You’ve fulfilled my dearest wish. I will forever be thankful to you. May you be blessed forever. You were the only one willing to listen. Thank you.” Jungwon nodded in his shoulder, trying not to burst into tears on the spot but failed nevertheless in the end. He was so glad seeing the happy man in front of him, now seeming even younger than before. The deep sunken eyes didn’t seem frightening anymore. They were warm and welcoming. He could see sparkles of youth inside them. Yes, Jungwon did the right thing.

When the clock showed sharply half an hour past midnight, Jungwon bid his farewell to the man, he weirdly would consider his friend now, knowing he could sleep well tonight. Taehyun insisted on him keeping the jacket he gave him as well as one of the pictures inside the box for his school project and as a token of gratitude. On his quiet walk back home, he smiled endearingly down to the old photograph he carefully held in his hand. It was the last picture. Where the family of four smiled happily into the camera, sitting onto the fluffy rug Jungwon recognised now. He would treasure this picture forever. It was a generous gift, knowing how important it had been to Mr. Kang. He was so thankful.

The next day, Jungwon excitedly presented his project in class. Even though his mother yelled at him concerned where he was until this late, he managed to edit the video for his project, tearing up in the process but still felt motivated to keep going. It was important that he made this his best project. Not for him or his grade, no, it was for Mr. Kang. He was determined to change everyone’s horrible opinion about the old man.

It was eye opening for everyone. Even Park Jongsong, the scary older student, couldn’t come up with a counter attack and stared wide eyed at the screen in front of the class. It was freeing, knowing that just a bit of courage and kindness could lead you to such wonderful moments. He changed everyone’s opinion about ‘Killer Kang’. And he managed to make an old sad man happy again.

After school, the kind student hurried over to Mr. Kangs house. In bright daylight, the garden looked like a battlefield with tons and tons of freshly digged soil laying all around. Now with a much happier feeling, Jungwon crossed the chaotic lawn, knocking energetically onto the old wodden door. After a while he still hadn’t heard any steps so he tried knocking again. “Mr. Kang? It’s Jungwon. I wanted to show you the finished project. It went amazing.” The boy excitedly bounced on the balls of his feet, too giddy to stand still. There was still no answer, so Jungwon made his way towards the backyard, now being familiar with every inch. He had a weird feeling in the pit of his stomache.

And when he saw the open veranda, the old man sitting in his mould on the old couch, Jungwon let out a relieved breath. With careful steps not to step inside one of the many holes in the ground, he made its way over to Mr. Kang, not without knocking on the wall outside. Still no answer. Maybe he hasn’t heard it or he was sleeping. Jungwon waddled over to the familiar couch, seeing Mr. Kang sitting in his usual spot with his eyes closed. He looked so peaceful, Jungwon first thought the old man was sleeping tightly. Yet when there was still no answers or reactions from his side and when he noticed there was no movement of his upper body, he understood…

Mr. Kang passed away last night. Tears welled up in Jungwons eyes and he heavily let them flow when he saw all the contents of the metallic box scattered around the small desk in front of him. The photos, sorted into time accuracy, the book untouched, the adorable drawings of his young daughter, the green giraffe smiling cheekily at him. The pink letter was open and the neat handwriting was still the same as yesterday. And in Mr. Kangs hands, layed the pink toy dolphin.

Jungwon went onto his knees beside him on the fluffy carpet, letting his hot tears fall freely without restrictions. He may had lost a friend today but he knew deep down, the old kind man was happily reunited with his family. He had gained everything he lost. And for that…how could Jungwon still be sad?

For now and forever, the courageous 14 year old boy, who acted righteous and kind, carried Kang Taehyuns life story out into the wide world, spread his last words so no one would forget the once mysterious man everyone feared to look at. Kang Taehyun, a man who got everything he wished for and then got it taken away from him. A man, who loved dearly. A man, whose story would never be forgotten.

[smilexcaptainx]

Can i get a chris when you two acted on a movie together (not as love interest tho cause shes only 22) and became good friends so they decided to quarantined together in readers LA home bc chris was worried about her being alone. Reader got asked to be part of the mv for "stuck with you" and so she asked him to slow dance with her for it (since thats what everyone was doing) & thats when he realized he has very strong feelings for her heheh

request an imagine here

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: Happy 2021! I’m just cleaning out all the requests from my inbox. You guys are truly amazing, and I love all the sweet messages that are sent to me. I love you guys, and I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 1.2K

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Chris bit into his folded pizza that you had teased him about earlier. You always found it odd that he ate his pizza that way, but it just gave more of a reason for Chris to make cute remarks back to you. He had been a good friend of yours ever since you starred in the same movie as him. He always claimed that you stole the spotlight from him, but you would just play along and agree with him.

When Quarantine had hit, Chris was more than happy to invite you over to his place and spend as much time with you as needed. Many nights of board games, movies, videogames, and just hanging out talking about life. You had gotten to know Chris on a deeper level. What shocked you the most was that he had gotten an Instagram!

It was like teaching your father how to use technology, but Chris eventually got used to the app. Tonight was one of those nights of a movie night. Chris had bought a pizza for the both of you to share. Chris had paused the movie for you to use the restroom. He was peacefully eating his pizza before he realized that you had been gone for a long time.

Normally, he would start the movie without you, but he knew how much you’ve wanted to see the movie. He wiped his hands onto his blue jeans after taking the last bite of his pizza. His ocean blue eyes scanned the area of the living room as he chewed up his final bite. He swallowed his bite and raised an eyebrow.

“Hey, [Y/N]! Where’d you go?” Chris called out, moving his plate off the couch and onto the little table in front of him. “You still alive?”

Chris lightly chuckled to himself as those words left his mouth. Although he found it humorous, he knew that it wouldn’t be funny if you actually were extremely hurt. Chris cleared his throat and rose up to his feet. He walked around the couch and started to go on a hunt for you through his house. He checked every room, every bathroom, but you weren't present in any of them.

Chris was beginning to worry. He speedily made his way back to the living room, only to see your figure sitting on the couch. Chris released a sigh of relief. He was glad to see that you were safe. If anything bad were to happen to you, Chris knew that he possibly wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. Chris walked up to you from behind.

“BOO!!!”

You shrieked in fear, your phone slipping out of your hand. Luckily, it landed on the cushion beside you instead of the ground. Chris wheezed out his laugh before patting you on the head. 

“That’s what you get for worrying me,” Chris joked, walking around the couch back to his seat. “Anyways, can we start the movie back up?”

You slapped your hand onto his back as he lowered himself down onto the couch. Chris froze as he felt your hand push him back up.

“You almost sat on my phone you fool,” You said, swiping the phone from the cushion. Chris smirked. “There, now you can sit down.”

Chris plopped down onto the cushion beside you, immediately swiping your phone from you. You gasped as you had lost the possession of your phone. You glanced over at Chris who had wide eyes.

“No way, is this the Ariana Grande? As in the girl from that one Nickelodeon show?” Chris asked, swinging his eyes over to meet with yours. You nodded. “What’s the occasion?”

“I-It’s nothing,” You stuttered, retrieving the phone back into your hands. Chris stared at you in disbelief. You sighed in defeat. “Fine. She asked if I could be part of her newest music video. It’s called stuck with you.”

“I don’t see any problem with that.”

“Um, the issue is that I need to find a dancing partner, which I was thinking would be you,” You explained further, his eyes piercing into yours. Your heart skipped a beat. “I’m a terrible dancer Chris, and you know that.”

“Unfortunately, that is true,” Chris said, slowly rising up to his feet. You remained seated as he descended his hand toward you. You shifted your eyes between his hand and his eyes. “But I’m not going to give up on teaching you.”

“I guess you could say that,” You mumbled, sliding your hand into his hand. Chris assisted you off of the couch. “Wait, before we start. I can play the song, you know, so we can get a feel of what it is. She said that she just wanted just a little slow dance sort of thing.”

“Slow dance? That sounds easy,” Chris said with a nod. “I’m ready when you are.”

You quickly pressed the play button. The song blasted through your phone speaker. Chris could already tell what the feel was. As you were focused more on listening to the song, Chris turned your attention from the phone.

“[Y/N], it’s a great song, but I kind of want to dance,” Chris said, pulling you closer to him. “I’ll lead the way.”

Chris kept you close as he began to sway back and forth. Your eyes fluttered shut as you got more into the song. It was romantic in a way, and you couldn’t be anymore happier. Chris was the only one you remotely even planned on slow dancing with, and now that it was happening, it felt like a dream. You gently laid your head against his chest as the song continued.

His presence had never felt so sweet. Chris tightened his grip onto your figure, smiling widely to himself. He couldn’t fight those butterflies that were appearing in his stomach. Never did he think that he was going to fall for someone like you so soon. He knew so much about you, and wanted to continue to learn even more.

He could feel himself falling for you the longer you remained close to him. He felt extremely intimate with you this very moment, and he couldn’t love it even more. Before Chris knew it, the song had come to an end. The sensation of having you this close to him lingered with him. You didn’t even realize that the song was over before Chris stopped moving.

You blinked yourself back into reality. You raised your eyes to meet with his diamond blue eyes.

“And you say you can’t dance,” Chris scoffed, causing you to blush lightly. “Anyways, is it time to start recording?”

“Yeah let me-”

“I want to record it on my phone,” Chris said, sliding his phone out of his back pocket. “I want this video on my phone so I can post it on Instagram afterwards,” Chris said, making you crack a small smile. “I want to show the world how terrible of a dancer you are.”

You acted offended and playfully whacked Chris on the shoulder who just laughed at your response. Chris set up his phone to record as you restarted the song. You two returned to your positions. Chris held tight onto your hand and smiled brightly at you.

“I know that we’re only supposed to do a snippet of us dancing,” Chris said, stepping closer toward you. “But I want to dance with you through the entire dance again. The first time was nice.”

“I agree.”

The moment you smiled up at Chris, that was when he knew. Although he was stuck with you, he was also in love with you.

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Feedback is always welcome!

I do not own this gif.

Credit goes to the owner!

my wattpad

[galactic-magick]

Remember Me: Agnes/Agatha Harkness x Reader

Request: Ok so I have this idea for a wandavision fic. Agatha had a wife prior to westview, and the wife comes looking for her and gets zapped into the hex. The wife loses all memories prior to westview so when she sees Agnes for the first time she’s like head over heels in love with her all over again. Agnes of course absolutely recognizes her and remembers everything and decides to woo her wife into marrying her again. Of course shenanigans ensue. Also Agatha doesn’t want to just give her wife’s memories back cause she wants to protect her. I also think the wife’s personality is pretty opposite to Agnes’s, I see her as more quite and innocent, but still bubly and positive. I know this is a lot lol but I just think it would make a great fanfic!

Summary: You and Agatha have been married for years, but a rough fight causes you to take a break for a while. When you’re ready to try again you go looking for her, but accidentally get sucked into the hex in the process and lose all your memories.

Words: 3.6k+

Warnings: spoilers, some angst

Author’s Notes: This fic got pretty long cuz I just kinda ran with this amazing idea, hope you enjoy! 

Taglist: @nyx-aira @midnight-lestrange @thestrangeundoing @dreamydanvers @sleep-deprived-athlete @dr-robotnik-said-hella @fallingfor-fics @p-nymph​ @thelanawinterrs​ @sunproud

-

-

-

You feel…lost.

It’s as if something was at the tip of your tongue, something extremely important was on your mind a few minutes ago, but you can’t think of it for the life of you.

You’ve always struggled with directions, so you know you probably took a wrong turn. You remember driving into a town called Westview, and you’re pretty sure you’re here now, but your mind feels fuzzy. You can’t recall anything that happened to you before driving here. Your body feels like it got ripped apart and put back together, if that’s even possible.

You try your best to shrug off your concerns, and you start to feel more and more at home here. You know what, you have been here your whole life. You grew up here, you have friends here, and you never want to leave.

Despite that, though, you have no idea where your house is. You drive around, searching for anything that looks familiar, to no avail.

You see a woman picking some flowers outside, so you pull over and get out to talk to her.

“Good afternoon!” you wave. “I don’t believe we’ve met, I’m Y/N,”

“Hello!” she smiles. “I’m Wanda. Are you one of my neighbors?”

“Oh, um, yeah! I’m in the neighborhood,” you nod. “Those flowers are beautiful. Is there a special occasion?”

“Yes, actually! It’s me and my husband’s anniversary today! I’m planning a romantic evening to surprise him when he gets home. One of my other neighbors gave me some ideas and tips,” she laughs. “Oh there she is again!”

You turn around to look at the house next door, and see the most beautiful human being you’ve ever seen in your life. There’s something familiar about her, like a distant memory. She waves at Wanda, but when she sees you she stares. She can’t take her eyes of you, like she’s seeing a ghost.

“Agnes! Come here a second!” Wanda calls her over. “This is Y/N, she also lives around here. Have you met?”

“Oh…”

She’s wearing a gorgeous yet simple plaid dress, and her smile is captivating. There’s a gleam in her eyes that’s magical, and you find yourself falling a little too hard for someone you just met. You’re not usually the type to lay your heart down so quickly, but something about her is different.

“Oh, no! I don’t think we have!” Agnes snaps out of her trance and shakes your hand. “I’m Agnes,”

“Y/N,”

“Lovely to meet you,” she momentarily turns her attention back to Wanda. “Now, is there anything else you need for tonight? Extra candles, more magazines, makeup?”

“Some more candles would be amazing, thank you,”

“Great, I’ll drop them off in a bit,” Agnes glances at you again. “Would you like me to walk you home, darlin?”

“Sure,” you start walking together down the sidewalk. “I’m sorry if this is weird, but I feel like I know you from somewhere,”

“Do you now?”

“Maybe you just have one of those faces,” you sigh. “Anyway, I honestly can’t remember where my house is. I’ve always been bad with directions,”

“Did you just move here recently?”

“Maybe?” you scratch your head. “I…think I’ve always been here, but maybe I left and came back. Is it weird that I can’t remember?”

“Not at all,” she smiles. “Is this it?”

You look, and there’s a house just a few down from Wanda’s that you can almost swear wasn’t there before. But it looks like home, it looks familiar.

“Yes! This is it!” you race up to the door, and find a key that fits perfectly in your pocket. “How’d you know this was mine?”

“I just had a feeling,” she says.

“Well, thank you very much,” you reply, about to close the door.

“Wait,”

“Hmm?”

“Would you like to get some ice cream tomorrow?”

You nod, a bit surprised she’s so interested in you, “Sure,”

 -

 You meet up again at the ice cream parlor the next day, and you’re shocked when you get there that Agnes has already ordered your favorite, and a couple scoops are in your grasp within a few minutes.

You sit down together and start eating it, “How’d you know this was my favorite?”

“Oh…um, you just seem like that kind of gal?” she takes a spoonful of her own.

When you’re both done, you take a walk around town, waving to other people you think you’ve seen in the neighborhood. It feels a little strange that you’re hanging out with Agnes for hours as if you’ve been friends for years, but at the same time it feels so right. It’s almost like she knows everything about you already, yet everything is still a mystery.

Later in the afternoon you attend the talent show together, and you find yourself laughing especially at Wanda and her husband Vision’s performance. Some of their tricks fool you enough into thinking they might be real, but how could they be? Magic is all just a trick on the eyes, isn’t it?

You say goodbye to everyone and turn in for the night, and you have a strange dream.

Agnes is there, but she looks different. Older? Younger? You’re not sure.

She smiles at you, and takes your face in her hands. She presses a kiss to your lips, and doesn’t let you go until you can’t breathe.

You continue to see snippets of you and her together, each time in a different place, maybe even a different era. You’re happy, it seems, the love is deep and strong, something so good you didn’t think it could exist.

Until the last one.

You’re yelling at each other, but you can’t make out the words, not even your own. You can almost feel tears streaming down your cheeks, and Agnes takes her bags and leaves. You fall on the couch, completely miserable. You can’t tell what happened, but the aching in your chest is enough to tell it was the worst thing you’ve ever experienced.

When you wake up the next morning, you don’t remember anything.

 -

 The world is now in color, but you honestly can’t recall what it looked like yesterday, so it doesn’t seem strange to you.

You get a call from Wanda telling you she’s pregnant, and you congratulate her excitedly. She asks you to keep it under wraps except for close friends, which makes sense since it’s so early on.

Even though you have plenty of time before the baby arrives, you decide to go out to the store and pick out some stuff you could give her. You’ve never had children of your own so you’re not sure exactly what she’d need, but you know the basics, like clothes, teething toys, and blankets.

You look through the racks and piles, picking out a few things you think would be cute.

“Don’t tell me you’re pregnant now too, hun,”

You jump, and you see Agnes behind you.

“Oh! Agnes, hi!” you exhale quickly. “No, no, I’m not. I’m just picking up some things for Wanda. Maybe we could plan her a little baby shower or something?”

“I’m just kidding, hun. And that’s a great idea!” she pushes her cart forward a bit. “I’ll catch up with you later, okay?”

You nod as she hurries away.

 -

 As you’re walking home, you see Agnes chatting with one of your other neighbors, Herb. You don’t particularly hear or care what they’re saying, but you stop in your tracks when you see something purple coming out of Agnes’s fingers.

Herb’s eyes roll back for a moment, and then they carry back on in conversation. After a few minutes Vision runs out of the house and talks to them a bit, then they all go their separate ways.

Maybe you were just seeing things, but something about that interaction was really weird.

You catch up with Agnes down the street, saying hello and asking how she is. She doesn’t seem to know you saw what happened, so you decide to ask yourself.

“What was that purple stuff coming out of your hands?”

“What?” she chuckles, scoffing as if you’re crazy. “What are you talking about?”

“I was walking by Wanda’s house earlier and I saw you talking to Herb, and there was something coming out of your hands. Maybe it was just weird light or reflections or something-“

“Oh, yes, that must be it,” she pats your shoulder. “Say, how about we grab some dinner or something?”

“Really?”

She raises a hand and strokes your head and hair, and it feels like a wave of calm rushes over you. She murmurs some words you can’t understand, and you forget what you were going to say.

“What was that for?” you giggle, cheeks flushing a bit at her tender touch.

“Oh, there was just something stuck in your hair, dear,”

 -

 “Agnes,” you say, after taking the last bite of your dinner. You’ve had a wonderful night, you don’t think you’ve smiled and laughed so much in your life, and she makes your heart feel like it’s transcending to peak happiness.

“Hmm?”

“I really love hanging out with you,” you’re too nervous to say the actual words you want to say, and you desperately hope she understands.

“I love hanging out with you too,” she reaches for your hand. “I’ve missed you,”

You cock your head, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, nothing,” she laughs. “It’s just…been awhile since I’ve had someone in my life that I care about so much,”

You sigh as she squeezes your hand, “Do you believe in soulmates?”

“I might,” she grins. “Why?”

“I just…I know it’s so weird, but I feel like there’s something between us that’s beyond our control, you know?” you talk fast, hoping getting all the words out quickly will help you to say what you’ve wanted to say since you first met. “Maybe we were together in another life, another universe, I don’t know, it’s just…it’s not just me, right?”

She shakes her head, and you can almost see a tear in her eye, “No, it’s not just you,” she kisses the palm of your hand. “I wish I could tell you everything, I really do,”

“What do you mean?”

“But I can’t,” she stands up and waves her hand in front of your face, all memories of your conversation slipping from your mind. “It’s for your own protection sweetheart, I promise. Once I figure out how all this is happening, we can be together again,”

 -

 Agnes walks you home that night, but you don’t want to leave. You’ve had such a wonderful time with her, and you can’t bear for it to end.

“Do you want to come inside?” you ask.

“Oh, honey, I don’t think I should,” she laughs.

“Please,” you beg. “Just for a little bit? I have some tea and cookies,”

“Alright,” she sighs. “Just for a little bit,”

You start boiling the water and arrange some cookies on a plate as Agnes sits down on the couch.

“What kind would you like?”

“I’ll take anything,” she says.

You return with a cup and plate for her and plop down on the cushion, “You know I should probably apologize,”

“For what, dear?”

“I just feel like I’ve been a bit forward, which is weird since I’m normally super reserved and shy, but I just feel so comfortable with you, ya know?” you sip your tea. “I feel like I’ve said or done something wrong. I can’t remember what, but I definitely did,”

“Oh darling, no,” Agnes shakes her head. “You’re perfect,”

“Really?”

“Yes, just as you always have been,” she lifts your chin and leans in, capturing your lips. “My everything,”

 -

 You never knew what head over heels felt like until now.

You wake up smiling, barely able to contain your emotions. You kissed Agnes last night. You kissed Agnes last night.

You. You did.

You head over to Wanda’s that morning, wanting to meet the twins and give your gifts. When you walk in they’re crying very loudly and Wanda and Vision look stressed out of their minds.

“Hey, Wanda!” you give her a hug. “Baby troubles?”

“Yeah, they just…won’t stop crying,” she sighs in exhaustion.

“Do you need any help?” you ask. “Also, I got you some stuff,” you hand her the gift bag.

“Oh! Thank you so much!” she smiles in appreciation. “And yeah, could you? I’ve tried everything, but if you have any ideas on how to calm them down go for it,”

You start to rock the cradles a bit, when you hear the doorbell ring.

“Hiya kids!” Agnes strolls in. “Hey hun,” she winks at you.

“Oh Agnes!” Wanda says, relieved to have yet another person to help with the situation. “Oh, Y/N, could you actually grab some milk for them? There’s some formula on the counter in the kitchen,”

“Yeah, sure!” you smile at Agnes, your heart pounding a bit before you turn around to make the milk.

As you’re stirring, you hear Vision escalate into a panic, and then it falls mysteriously silent.

“Do you want me to take that again?” you hear Agnes say.

What?

“You want me to hold the babies, should we just take it from the top?”

You hear Wanda laugh and the conversation continues on normally. You finish mixing up the milk and head toward the living room, but you meet Agnes running in to look for some liquor.

“Agnes! What do you think you’re doing?” you whisper.

“What do you mean? I’m just trying to help with the kids, just like you!”

“Yeah, but, you’re acting really weird,” you shake your head, staring at her in disbelief. “What were you talking about in there? Taking it from the top? What does that even mean?”

“Oh, honey, don’t worry. I’m just a little jazzed up today!” she kisses your cheek.

“Y/N! AGNES! The kids are gone!” Wanda gasps.

You rush in, and all of your turn around towards the stairs to see two definitely not baby boys in front of you.

“Ah, kids. You can’t control ‘em, no matter how hard you try,” Agnes chuckles, taking a sip of her drink.

Are you the only one that finds it strange that the twins randomly grew older right in front of you?

 -

 That evening you go on another date with Agnes. She doesn’t bring up anything that happened this morning, but she does mention the tragedy of Wanda’s family’s dog passing away. You feel awful, especially since they got him recently.

For the most part it’s a normal date, you’re still very much in love with her and you have an amazing time.

But by the end of it when you’re heading back home, the eerie feeling returns, and you can’t keep ignoring it. You need answers, and you need them now.

“Something’s not right here, Agnes,” you observe. “Everyone here acts weird, especially Wanda and Vision, and even you sometimes. I don’t get it,”

“Darling-“

“No!” you snap. “Every single time I’ve brought up feeling weird with you or in this town in general you distract me so I forget about it. You know something Agnes, I can tell you do. Why won’t you be honest with me? If we’re gonna do this relationship thing, we need to be honest with each other,”

She takes a deep breath, “I can’t,”

“Why not?”

“I can’t now, but I will,” she says. “This weekend, Halloween. Meet me at my house and I’ll tell you and show you everything,”

“Do you promise?”

“Yes, I promise,” she nods, then leans in to kiss you. “I just have to do a few more things first,”

She walks away.

 -

 You stand outside her house on Halloween just as she asked, dressed in a cheap witch costume you found in your closet.

“Oh, look at us!” Agnes opens the door, eyeing you up and down and grinning. “We match!”

You laugh as she takes you hand and leads you to her car.

Before she pulls out, she turns to you, a glaze of fear in her eyes.

“Are you sure you want to know everything?”

“Yes,” you nod.

“Okay,” she presses down the pedal and drives.

She passes by all the familiar streets, into the neighborhoods you’ve never seen. There’s people outside that are barely moving, and the farther you go, the more frozen they become. It begins to scare you a bit, but you trust Agnes to explain everything to you when you get to your destination.

She finally stops the car at the last stop sign on the edge of town, and everything ahead looks like an empty field.

“You don’t remember how you got to Westview, do you?” she asks.

“No,” you shake your head. “I think I’ve been here a while, but my past is fuzzy,”

“But somehow you have memories of me?”

“I…” you search your thoughts. “I felt like I recognized you when we first met, yeah. But I don’t think they were actually memories,” you look into her eyes. “Why, do you think they’re real memories or something?”

“I know they are,”

“You mean, we were together before?”

“Yes,” she nods, and her gaze falls to the floor, unable to look at you. “But it didn’t end well. I made a lot of mistakes, and you asked me to leave, so I did. I’ve been all over the place, and I ended up here. Then all of a sudden, you were here too,”

You can’t believe what you’re hearing, “How come I don’t remember any of that?”

“Wanda created and controls this town. She wiped and changed your memories,”

“Wanda?” you scoff. “How would she even do that? And even if someone could do that, why would they? She’s so nice, you really think she’s controlling me?”

“I don’t know how she’s doing it, that’s what I’m trying to find out. But I know it’s her. She’s the only other magical being in this town, and she got her powers from an infinity stone. Maybe it’s just that, maybe she’s a mutant, maybe it’s chaos magic, I don’t know. But she’s the one,”

You shake your head, almost giggling at how ridiculous it sounds, “Agnes, no, you’re not making any sense. Magic? Infinity stones? Mutants? Are you serious? Come on, just tell me the truth,”

“I am telling you the truth,”

“Stop lying to me!” you storm out the car door, walking back towards town. Agnes calls after you, but you keep going. “I can’t be with you if all you’re going to tell me is complete bullshit!”

“Y/N!”

Your feet lift off the ground and you spin around, flying through the air towards her. You scream, and you see that same purple smoke coming out of her fingers that you saw before. She pulls you against her, one arm wrapped around your waist and another cradled around your head.

“It’ll all make sense now, sweetheart,”

She whispers a spell and all the memories flood back into your mind. Your real first meeting, your first kiss, your first date. Your wedding day, your first house. You see every moment, the good and the bad, the way she looked at you like you’re an angel every single day. You relive every anniversary, every holiday together, every tradition you shared, and finally the last moments together, and the day you decided you wanted your beloved wife back.

“Agatha?” you whisper.

“Yes,” she crashes her lips to yours, taking in everything she loves, everything she missed. You wrap your arms around her neck, kissing her deeply, a smile escaping every so often. You don’t care that it’s messy, you don’t care if your teeth get in the way, you’re in love and you never want to let her go again.

“I’m so sorry, darling,” she exhales, breathless.

“No, I’m sorry,” you say between more kisses. “I can’t live without you Agatha. I can’t,”

“It’s okay, we’re together again,” she slithers her fingers into your hair.

“But what now?” you wipe your teary eyes. “If you’re right about Wanda using magic to control everything, what do we do?”

“I’ve been dropping clues to make Vision suspicious, and I’ve been trying to get her to crack,” she says. “I have a feeling she might make it all crumble on her own. If it’s chaos magic like I think it is, it’s unpredictable and she might lose control if she keeps it up much longer,”

“Do you…think she’s doing it on purpose?”

“She has some consciousness of it, yes, but I don’t think she’s trying to hurt anyone,” Agatha replies. “But at the same time, I don’t think she’d hesitate to hurt anyone either if someone threatened her,”

“Oh,” you fall back in her arms a bit so you can look up at her. “How come you didn’t return my memories when we first met again?”

“I wanted to protect you. I was afraid you might get targeted if Wanda found out you remembered who you are, I doubt she’d hurt you but I couldn’t risk it,” she runs her thumb along your cheek. “Plus I thought it might be fun to fall in love with you all over again,”

You laugh, “It was kind of fun,”

She pulls you in for another kiss, “I love you, sweetheart,”

“I love you too,”

She holds you close, making up for all the lost time. You’re not sure what will happen or what you’ll have to deal with next, but you’ll do it together. Always, no matter what.

[thatdoctorharvey]

Hi howdy ho neighborino! I’ve been reading some of your fics and I love them! I was wondering if you could write something where the farmer has married Harvey but Harvey gets jealous of the other bachelors that farmer has high friendship with angst. I saw the flowers fic and I thought it was super cool but it would be cute for things to work out in the end

Okay so for this one, I saw the perfect opportunity to do a little snippet of how my Harvey x Reader book is going to be. It’s not gonna be anything directly from the book but it will give you a pretty good idea as to how everything will be written.

Also, for the sake of Sam can’t pick out a name for his band, I’m going to use the name of my Uncle’s former band (I got his permission, don’t worry). This will be important.

I did kind of incorporate flowers into this as well. Gotta have the flowers prompt with a good ending too, right?

I also apologize. The pacing for this is a bit rushed and there isn’t much Harvey at the beginning but you’ll see why.

This was the last thing you expected. It had been years since you had been to the city. Yet here you were.

“You ready for this (y/n)?” Sam asked you, seeming to be pretty pumped up.

“Always!” You replied, brushing your hair out of your face.

You looked beside you at the equipment. It was just the mics and guitars, the rest being among the other band members. For once, you were nervous. The last time you performed in the city, you had made a fool of yourself. You silently hoped no one remembered as it was the reason you ended your musical career.

Abigail suddenly tapped your shoulder from the seat beside you, leaning into the isle and waiting for you. You quickly snapped out of your little trance and leaned to her, feeling like a teenager back in high school again.

“What’s up?” You asked.

“Are you and Harvey okay? I didn’t see him talk to you when we were loading up and he’s all the way in the back.” She asked you.

You took a quick glance back to the crowd of townsfolk on the bus. Sure enough, there he was, the very back of the bus, by himself. He looked to be bored as he stared out the window.

“I mean, he’s been very meh lately with talking to me, but I’ve also been practicing with you guys a lot for the past couple months to prepare for this.” You looked back at her. “He wasn’t happy when I said I offered to sit with the equipment to make sure it didn’t break on the way there.”

Abigail looked to Harvey and then quickly back to you. “Shit. He saw me looking.”

“So, (y/n), I was thinking, maybe we could perform one of your old songs?” Sam suddenly interrupted. 

You and Abigail both looked to him. It didn’t take long to realize that, not just Sam, but Abigail and Sebastian were looking at you now. They had been talking about this for a while and had been practicing when you weren’t around.

“Wh..which one?” You asked, a little nervous.

“We won’t tell you until the end. That’s when we want to perform it!” Sam smiled brightly.

Abigail grabbed your hand. “Pleeeeease! It’s a good one!”

You sat back in your seat and let out a breath. Harvey had only heard you sing a select few times, but to hear one of your old songs with how he’s been acting. It just wasn’t a good idea...But it was just a song, right?

“What the hell, let’s do it.” You suddenly said, looking at your guitar case beside you. “But just one!”

All three of them fist pumped and looked to Pam, who was giving them a dirty look. Luckily, they had arrived at the spot they would be performing so they had a valid excuse to leave.

“Alright you four! Get your stuff and get off the bus!” Pam grumpily said in a semi-joking manner.

“Don’t gotta tell me twice.” You mumbled to yourself and grabbed as much equipment as possible. Kent and Demetrius helped get everything off the bus and onto the stage. Everyone riding was going to have some fun in the city until the concert, aside from a select few who would stay and help set up. Harvey was not one of them.

“Alright, (y/n), once we get set up, do you mind doing your thing while we check equipment?” Sam asked.

“Sure! I know none of you will sing into the mics to test them so I might as well.” You jokingly replied, taking off your hoodie to show the upper half of your band outfit. It was a bit revealing but nothing super intense. It also hugged your body fairly well. “Let’s get this going so we can get this show on the road!”

All three of your bandmates cheered. This was big for all of you. Sure, you’d had a few decent sized crowds in bars before, but this was a whole new thing. You were about to perform on a stage! A real stage! There weren’t just going to be drunk men and weird girls! There were going to be hundreds of people! Even your husband was going to be there!

...Harvey…

“Hey! Come on, you gotta help me with the mics.” Sam suddenly said, snapping you out of your thoughts. The sky had darkened a bit but not too much. Just enough to notice that time had passed.

“O-oh! Sorry! I got distracted.” You said and walked to your mic. “Just let me know when you have them all on.”

Sam nodded and went to the little booth, turning all the mics on and muting all but yours. “Good to go! Abigail, Sebastian, you know the routine.”

The three of you nodded and began the process. You had done this many times back at home. You had performed some of your more family friendly music during the events through the year, and of course, this meant you had set up the mics before.

So there you were. The middle of Zuzu City. The crowd began to form as your singing began to test the mics. Even though it sounded weird since you had to move from mic to mic, it still sounded good. You didn’t know that your husband was listening though. And the song you were singing was hitting him like a ton of bricks. Memories...Was he nothing but a memory now?

Soon enough, the time came. The crowd stood in front of the stage, the townsfolk among them. You couldn’t seem to spot your husband though, but you knew he was out there. Perhaps the lights were making you unable to see him. They were already affecting your vision.

“Hello everyone!” Sam spoke. “We are from Pelican Town!” He seemed to be oddly confident, something that everyone in town knew wasn’t right, especially for a first big performance like this. “And we are the Block Party Massacre!”

And just like that, everything began. Everyone began to play their instruments and you sang. The crowd cheered and clapped after each song. Once you reached the final song, you nearly cried. Some of the people in the crowd began to sing along. It brought back memories and it truly touched your heart to know that  your fans still remembered your songs.

But, like everything else, the concert came to an end. You helped get everything cleaned and loaded up before looking around. At last second, you saw Harvey getting on the bus. Immediately you went to Abigail.

“Hey, you mind sitting with the equipment? I...I think I should sit with Harvey.” You asked her.

“Sure! Just, go easy on him. He looked pretty hurt, especially during the last song.” She replied.

You simply gave a nod and hurried over to the bus. You took a breath before getting on and looking at the seats. Harvey was still in the same place, the very back. You made your way back there, slowly sitting beside him. He jumped a bit, seeming to have been in his own world.

“O-oh. Hi.” He said when he realized who had sat beside him.

You offered a smile. “Hi my love. Did you have fun?”

Harvey just gave you a look. Not one of love nor hate. More like hurt. Out of instinct, you gently grabbed his hand, turning your body to face him.

“Harvey. Look at me.” You said softly. “What’s wrong? You’ve been like this since I started practicing with them.”

The doctor looked at you for a minute and then to your hands. He wanted to say so much but his anxiety ridden mind wouldn’t let him.

“Do you love me?” He suddenly asked after a few short moments.

You offered a soft smile and rested your head on his shoulder. Was that why he was making a big fuss?

“Of course I do! I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t. What made you think I didn’t?”

“You...You just never talked to me and you always got home late and you were so close with Sam a-and Sebastian and Abigail an-”

“Harvey.” You placed a finger on his lips as you looked back up at him. “You are the only one I love. I tried making you breakfast and dinner but you always let it sit out. I tried to talk to you but you always ignored me. I thought you were pushing me away, so I started opening up my schedule to practices. That’s what I’ve been doing the past few months.”

The doctor didn’t know what to say.

“Answer me this; would I ever want to leave you, my comfy pillow and cuddle bug, for Sam?” You poked his belly for emphasis on the pillow part. “You are everything I wanted and more. Hell, I didn’t even know what I really wanted until I met you.”

“But...The song…”

“I wrote that a long time ago. Didn’t you hear? People were singing along. How would they know a song the band wrote if they had never heard it before?” You chuckled a little bit and hugged him.

“I…” Harvey slowly wrapped his arms around you. “I guess that is true.” His grip tightened slightly, but not enough to hurt you. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey. It’s fine. We can cuddle when we get home. That always cheers you up.” You said happily. “Just, please communicate with me next time. I don’t want you to be hurt like this. It hurts my heart.”

He kissed the top of your head, looking up when he heard the bus start up. “Yeah...I’m sorry. I’ll do better next time.”

And with that, you two headed home.

BONUS

The fire crackled as you rested on the couch. It was a rather peaceful night, the sky clear and the animals not too loud. Crickets could be heard if you listened closely, but you didn’t want to listen to them. You would rather listen to something else.

“(Y/n), are you certain you’re comfortable?” Harvey asked, a hand rested on your back. The other held a glass of wine that he’d been sipping on. “You don’t look to be.”

“Oh trust me Harvey, I am.” You assured your husband, nuzzling a bit against his belly as your arms slightly tightened their grip around his waist to indicate a hug. “I am always comfortable when I lay on my pillow.”

He blushed and took another sip of his wine before setting the glass on the side table. He was half laying on the couch, you on top of him. On the coffee table in front of you was a vase that contained a small bouquet of flowers. He had made it for you once you two had gotten home as an apology for his behavior. In return, you gave him some of your finest wine that you had planned on selling to make up for everything.

“I love you Harvey. Don’t ever forget it.” You half whispered, looking up at him.

The doctor couldn’t help but smile back, his face still red. “I love you too (y/n).”

“I will never forget it.”

[shashawip]

Mia Asking Jason About His Feelings For Roy While Cooking

Summary:

Mia asking Jason about his feelings for Roy while cooking, and Jason didn’t deny it.

Notes:

English isn’t my native spoken language so there can be grammatical errors.

This snippet is from an originally planned fiction revolving around Roy, Jason and Mia with Mia being the witness of Royjay’s developing relationship. I may never find a chance to finish their story so I will just post moments that I enjoyed writing while picturing their world. Hope you enjoy.

Published on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33110860

——

It wasn’t Mia's turn to cook today, but not like she minded it and all. She’s in a good mood lately given how well the day job has turned out, and the camaraderie she’s developed with the colleagues at work.

To be frank, the two other housemates’ cooking skills just weren’t satisfying. Jason was alright, if he really paid attention and invested his time to cook. Same cannot be said for Roy, however, who was an entirely different story. The only edibles on his menu might just be that ham and cheese sandwich he seemed to be barely able to assemble.

Mia hummed in joy while she poured her lasagna sauce into a rectangular Le Creuset, which had already been layered with some pre-made lasagna sheets. She raised her eyes to look at Roy who’s sitting across the kitchen island, while still preserving her attention down at the stoneware.

“I never knew you’d be so interested in a wooden door before.” Mia chuckled.

Roy seemed to be dragged out of his lost thoughts and back to the world by her voice, quickly moving away his glaze, looking a little embarrassed. He’d been fixed to the stool he’s sitting on and stared at Jason’s bedroom door with his head rested in his elbow in the same position for quite a while, even the oven had been pre-heated.

Mia continued to work on layering sheets and pouring the mixture from the saucepan, the warm steam spreading the fresh smell of tomato, garlic, slightly caramelized pork and veal bolognese along with other goodness that’s been well combined into the open air kitchen. She kept her head down while going on, “Figured what’s getting into your head. Now that James and I are dating, Jason seems like about to start one himself, you’d be thinking of finding someone to hang out with too?”

Roy admitted almost immediately, let go of an unnoticeable sigh for Mia seemed to not be aware what’s really going on in his mind. “Didn’t you always mention that girl… the one on that team you and Dick were on back then, was it Danielle?” “Donna.” “Donna. Anyway. I don’t know, maybe you can try contacting her again?” Roy looked a little confused by her suggestion. “Donna… she’s a partner and a good friend that’s all. Also I haven’t caught up with the Titans for quite some time.” “But there is always a chance out there somewhere, right?”

By now Roy seemed to have lost interest in this topic, and just shook his head towards the room that Jason was in, and steered the conversation back to what’s happening in there. “You can’t know… that girl, she came here and was after Jason…” Mia knew what he’s going on and about, “If you ask me, well, from a female perspective, what she’s after from Jason could not have been any more obvious.”

Just a little less than half an hour ago, a silver white long haired girl walked in from the front door of their apartment without giving any heads up, she promptly glanced over the room, including Roy who was laying on his back in the couch at the time, and Mia who’s busy preparing their dinner behind the counter. She briefly studied the situation, confirmed with the cook which bedroom was Jason’s, then dashed and disappeared into that room with a not-so-gentle bang as she closed the door, leaving Roy and Mia completely dazzled and curious.

Roy exchanged looks with Mia as he got up. He thought that girl looked familiar before he remembered that he, or rather, him and Jason had met her on the plane from Gotham back to Star City. She was sitting across the aisle, had started to strike a conversation with Jason around halfway of the flight. Roy hadn’t paid them too much attention as he curled up comfortably in his window seat and napped almost the entire time. When their plane had arrived and the seatbelt signs turned green, and Jason stood up to reach their backpack from the overhead bin, Roy saw the girl had slipped a thin piece of paper into the back-pocket of his jeans.

Roy had never seen her again after they got back home, until just now. He bet that Jason had contacted her without him and Mia knowing, and for Christ’s sake, he’d exposed their secret headquarters - an apartment on Winnick St that the three of them would scramble each month to come up with the rent for - to a stranger that hadn’t gone through their little gang’s trust test.

Mia saw him shuffled around yet eyes glued to that door, so she ordered him to buy some more basil leaves from the store that apparently her topping sauce is now short of. Roy groaned before leaving the apartment, still managed to strike a last look at that door that the girl has vanished into.

Some time later, the girl has finally decided to stomp out of that room again, she glimpsed over Mia, without saying a word then bounced across the communal space before walking right out, seemingly assuming oneself to be one of, otherwise, the owner of the house.

When Jason emerged just a little later too, Mia then stared at the ceiling and started talking at loud to herself, “Gotta be impressed with all the soundproof works of these walls, you can’t even hear a thing that you’d expected from the other side.”

Jason said that he and Roslyn merely spoke while in there and nothing more had happened. He looked around and asked where Roy is. Mia told him that she requested him to go to the shop and get her some more basils. Jason pondered on that. Mia figured out he’s gauging whether he should go out too, “I thought he might want some air for himself seeing that both his housemates are romantically involved in a relationship.” Jason started to look confused.

Mia thought to herself, Mia Deardon, don’t you screw this one up. She made an effort to calm her tone of voice before speaking up again. “That girl and you, aren’t you a thing or about to be?” She probed in a slightly joking way.

“A thing?” Jason now looked even more puzzled, as if this image of presumed future has never come across his mind before, “I don’t recall anything remotely like that ever discussed in our conversation.”

Mia stopped what she’s doing and pointed a silicon spatula at him, which was still covered with warm tomato chunks, “Jason, when you let a girl walk into your room, you should be prepared to provide her the chance of a mutually respectful association that is what we called a relationship, instead of just fooling around and walk away like a jerk.” Though in this particular scenario, the female individual seemed to matched that perona more, Mia had no intention of pointing that out.

“I’ve not even had a clue how she found this place, I thought she’s just some upper manager of a business, not some sort of a detective.”

Mia squinted her eyes, clearly not buying, “You know, usually a girl found out a guy’s address through a text message or a phone call.”

“Trust me, Mia, I’ve never even asked for her number.” Jason wiped his forehead and started to feel the angst up his gut, but he tried hard to not let it unleash upon Mia. “Do we have enough ingredients for tonight?” He indicated the kitchen bench filled with mixing bowls and food scraps with a nod. Mia gave it a thought, then answered, “We might have just run out of paprika, can you give Roy a ring and ask him to get a jar from the shop?”

“I’ll head down myself, don’t think he can hear the call right now.” Jason turned around to leave. Just when the door’s about to be opened, Mia called his name.

“Jason, do you love Roy?”

His hand on the doorknob came to a sudden halt. He paused for a second, “Why’d you say that?”

Mia took a deep breath, giving her best to not give away the fact that she’s rehearsed over and over what’s coming next. Instead of answering the question, she continued, “I’m not saying the kind of brotherhood you’d shared with Dick or your other partners from the cop shop, what I meant was something like Ollie and Dinah, like between me and James.”

Jason looked to be caught off guard with what she’s just said, and Mia for one was happy with how this whole situation had been going, as he at least didn’t just abruptly deny the question nor went on interrogating why the hell she’d stir up some shit like that. She heaved a sigh of relief, carefully thanking herself for the sharp observation and analysis she’d secretly inducted on themselves.

Jason looked at her, without saying a word, seemed to be still waiting for her to go on. So she did. “Roy is the kind of person that, how should I put this, would rather let his feelings sink than swim if you don’t show anything to him first. Probably why he and Ollie never saw each other eye to eye when they came across.” Jason nodded in agreement. “If he thinks that the other person doesn’t share a mutual feeling, I bet you he’d take it to his grave than ever speaking up about it.” This actually has contradicted to Roy’s impression on him, as he always saw the guy as carefree and weren’t shy about showing his affections towards the others, but Jason wasn’t going to oppose otherwise and just let Mia kept on.

“He had a crush on a girl in that crime fighting group he was in before, always claimed that he wasn’t good enough for her, so the girl never found out his feeling for her in the end.” Mia fixed her eyes on him, her spatula had now dropped to the bench surface as she leaned against the edge with both of her arms, looking at him demurely, “He’s recently acting more and more like that again. I don’t know about you, but here’s what I thought, if that other person this time at least showed him some sort of hints, maybe he wouldn’t have too many regretful undone deeds to carry with him to his tomb after all.”

Jason lowered his head and thought on that for a moment, his hand already loosen from the doorknob and he just noticed how his palm had been sweating all this long. He turned around to face Mia behind the island, who’d clearly done speaking and was waiting patiently for a response. Jason found her gaze again as he meticulously raised his eyes, “And you think this person… is… me?”

Mia grinned, “We both know that his current social life, or rather, his only life is devoted on bringing down that Merlin’s evil little scheme, which the whole operation comprises only two people, and he’s surprisingly one of them.” She could not have been clearer than that who the other person she’s referring to.

Jason couldn’t bring himself to let out of a word. There was too much to be said, too many questions bursting in his chest. When did Mia start to notice Roy’s altered behaviours as she described? How did she work out the confidence to ask him about it and not even worry that she might’ve been wrong? Did Roy ask her to feel him out, or was her perception of Roy’s feeling for him even legit?

“Jason, hello, someone in there?” His thought had been interrupted with her teases as he drown, “So let me ask again, Jason, do you love Roy? The kind of love like between Ollie and Dinah?”

The former Robin had let out a deep breath before cracking her a smile, “I’m gonna go get us some more paprika from the shop.” Then he opened the door and left the apartment.

None of the three housemates had ever demanded paprika when they had lasagna night, Jason knew better than that, and he secretly thanked Mia a thousand times as he sprinted downstairs.

——

End of snippet

End notes:

I draw Royjay fan arts from time to time, if you liked this story you’re welcome to also check them out on my Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shashawip

[wackybuddiemewbs]

Random Buddie Fic Snippets - Shadow

AKA, it's me, back on my regular bullshit. This is part of a fic that continues to ghost through my Word files, mocking me relentlessly. And now I pass the mocking on. Bon appétit. Basic idea is that Buck disappeared after the lawsuit without a trace. For mysterious reasons.

Eddie breaks into a run the moment he parks the car. He still can’t believe it that some asshole tried to blow himself up on a plaza in bright daylight, the same plaza Chris and his friend from school went to on exactly that day. His ears had been glued to the radio throughout the drive as he got announcement after announcement, one more horrifying than the other.

“The man has a bomb belt.”

“He has taken a hostage.”

“A young woman.”

“Special forces have been blocked due to traffic.”

“A man stepped in.”

“They struggle. There is a knife.”

“There is blood.”

“Both men are going down.”

Eddie shakes those thoughts off, pushes them as far back as he possibly can as he runs through the masses of people gathered around the plaza. Because apparently, even a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest will get peoples’ attention more than it will get their survival instincts to run the hell away from a bomb.

He runs into Deborah, the mom of Christopher’s friend, nearly misses her, then halts. His ears are whooshing, his heart is pounding so hard he can feel it in his throat. She keeps rambling on about stuff he doesn’t care about. And if he wasn’t a first responder who knows better, Eddie would want to shake her right now to just say it straight: Where is Christopher? Is he okay? Because that’s the info he needs to know how to get his feet to work again.

If this were Buck, I’d have all info in the first three seconds of…

Eddie stops himself. Buck is no longer with them. He left, which is why his son is at the plaza with Deborah and her two kids rambling on.

At last, at last, between the many sorrys, Deborah can finally bring herself to say that Christopher is fine, which makes even less sense to Eddie. Because if he was fine, then why wasn’t he with her? Isn’t she supposed to be watching him?

“He’s by the ambulances. He wouldn’t leave.”

Eddie isn’t sure he says something in reply to Deborah before he starts running again, though he reckons she won’t hold it against him. Even if she does, he doesn’t bother to care. Eddie needs to get to his son. Maybe Christopher was hoping to see some familiar faces. Maybe he’s waiting for his dad to jump out of one of the trucks.

Eddie can finally slip through the onlookers to the ambulances. Just as he takes off running again, he can hear Christopher shouting shrilly. While his son screaming is not exactly calming, it makes Eddie breathe a little easier. He is alive. He can hear him. Everything else, he can fix.

Eventually, Eddie finds his son sitting on top of a gurney halfway rolled into the back of one of the ambulance cars. Next to him stands a very frustrated paramedic, trying to reason with Christopher to climb off the gurney and let go of the someone actually lying on the gurney. Though Christopher holds on as if his life depended on it.

What is going on here?

“Christopher!” he shouts as he approaches.

The paramedic turns around as he sees him come near. “Hey, you are from the 118, right?”

“Yes, Eddie Diaz,” he confirms. “That’s my son. Is he okay?”

“He is fine, he just won’t let me load up the guy I’m supposed to take to the hospital,” the paramedic laments, pointing at his son holding on to the person’s lower leg like a little monkey to a tree branch.

“Christopher! I”

“Dad!”

“I told you that you can’t be in the way of paramedics working! They got to help people who are hurt,” Eddie says. While he doesn’t want to upset his son, he knows that there is due order, and Christopher is disrupting it.

Eddie motions past the opened door of the ambulance car.

“I am not letting go of Buck!”

Buck?

Eddie blinks, tears his gaze up, forgets how to breathe all over again.

“Hi, Eddie.”

“Buck.”

Buck is on the gurney, shirt cut open, his side bandaged, seeping some blood. The guy who went in after the bomber took the hostage – Evan Buckley. His former colleague, former best friend, the guy who’d told him instantly if Christopher was okay, who never would have left him out of sight – until he did. The man who disappeared after the lawsuit. The man he hasn’t seen in over a year.

He can tell that this is actually Buck. Just that it isn’t. He looks nothing like the always cheery, smiling guy who lit up any room he entered. Sure, the face is still the same, Eddie would know that birthmark anywhere. And yet… there is no spark to his blue eyes. His hair is cut as short as it will go. Eddie can tell that he has even more muscle to him than he used to, even before the firetruck exploded and he was in top shape. But what makes it so much worse is to see the distance, the way he can’t seem to hold on to Christopher but tries to gently keep him away. Because nothing in this world would prevent him from letting that kid close to him.

At least we all thought. But that man is full of surprises, we learned. Even more so now.

This is Even Buckley, but he looks like a strange version of himself dropped off in the wrong universe.

Like a ghost.

Like the ghost Chimney said he saw in that burning building the other day.

Could it be…?

“Could you please talk to your son?” the paramedic interjects, pulling Eddie out of his thoughts abruptly. “I get he’s scared for your friend, but we can finally get moving again after the traffic was re-navigated and he needs to go the hospital.”

“I already told you that the guy didn’t hit anything vital, Jack,” Buck scoffs. Normally, Eddie would say that this is Buck as he knows him, but there is that edge in his voice all of a sudden that puts him on that same edge. The words come out just the same way, the voice is the same, but they ring hollow, they never make it to his eyes.

“He knifed you, dude.”

“I used to like you until a hot second ago, man.”

“Buck?” Eddie asks simply. The younger man’s eyes instantly flicker back to him, and Eddie can see his sudden discomfort as he bows his head.

“For the love of God, either you take your son, or you take him inside so we can drive!” Jack shouts.

“We’re going with you, Buck!” Christopher screams, holding on even tighter.

Eddie decides right at that moment. Okay, he doesn’t really. His body does as he grabs Christopher and gets him off Buck’s leg under much protest. Jack loads Buck inside – and then Eddie climbs in with Christopher in his arms right after. He ignores the protests coming from buck all the same.

“Fuckin’ finally,” Jack groans, setting everything up.

“Language,” Buck scolds. “There’s a kid here. Also, you just turned out to be my least favorite paramedic, Jack. Just so that you know.”

“I’m not here to make friends,” Jack says as he slams the door shut.

“With that attitude, you are sure as hell ain’t getting any,” Buck shouts after him.

“We are ready to roll!” Jack calls out, tapping his hand on the side of the car as he makes his way to the front.

“You know you’re just making a fool of yourself, dragging a guy to hospital, even though all you’d have to do is disinfect and stitch, yeah?” Buck tries to reason, but Jack isn’t having it, “Not taking any chances.”

“Coward.”

“Buck,” Eddie tries again. It seems to be a little magic trick, as Buck’s attention instantly return to him. Though it’s a piss-poor magic trick, really. Because Buck won’t even look at him. Can’t, for some reason. Instead, he keeps his head fixed on some of the equipment on the other side of the ambulance.

“Trust me, I didn’t plan on this,” he says feebly, some of the tough masquerade momentarily slipping.

“How are you in LA?” Eddie wants to know. He can see the shift in Buck instantly as he rounds his shoulders. “Plane.”

“Will you at least look at me?”

Buck turns his head. Eddie tries to read the emotions, but it’s like he gets the door shut in his face before he can take a look inside. And that even though they used to know each other so well.

How did we come to this?

“Buck, we haven’t see you or heard from you for over a year,” Eddie tries to reason. “Some more information than having come here by plane would be appreciated.”

“As I said, didn’t plan on this. Though of course I’m always happy to see Chris…,” Buck says, managing the smallest of smiles at Chris still snuck in his father’s arms. “Though I would have hoped for… different circumstances.”

“So you wanted to come see us?” Eddie asks.

Buck doesn’t answer, which is answer enough for Eddie.

“What were you thinking, going after that guy anyway?” Eddie can’t help but ask.

Buck shrugs at him. “Just had to. Will say though, that he brought a knife to a bomb fight came as a surprise. Thankfully, he was just as surprised to me bringing fists to a knife fight.”

“Why are you being that reckless, huh?” Eddie can’t help but scold. “You could’ve gotten yourself killed.”

“Yeah, or I could’ve watched as anything within a periphery of half a mile would’ve blown up,” Buck retorts. “Easy equation to my mind, really.”

It shouldn’t be that easy, though, Eddie thinks to himself bitterly, but he doesn’t say it. He has a million questions, but they won’t come. Because he knows Buck won’t give those answers. There is a wall between them that wasn’t there before, not even when Eddie was overcome with so much anger over Buck’s behavior about the lawsuit.

So he just sits back, makes sure that Christopher stays secure in his arms.

Once they arrive at the hospital, things set back into motion fast. Buck has a small moment of victory when he’s getting wheeled inside, arguing that Eddie won’t get the doctors to let him pester him like Jack did.

Joke’s on Buck in the end when Eddie talks to the receptionist because he forgot to update his emergency contact list, in which Eddie is very much included.

“See you in a bit, Buck!” is all he says as Buck is wheeled away.

And Buck shows him the finger as he is taken away, well aware that Christopher can’t see as he is resting against Eddie’s chest.

After that, Eddie makes himself not at all comfortable in the plastic chairs he loathes with a burning passion. He gets out his phone, hoping that he can get through to Maddie at least. Maybe she will have more luck trying to give Buck a piece of mind, but as he checks his phone, there is no signal. No calls, no internet. Looking around, he can see that the same issue applies to many people waiting – and the staff as well.

While Eddie still doesn’t believe in all-powerful universes, he will have to say: Well played, universe.

An hour later, Eddie is none the wiser and Christopher asleep next to him in the small room they were brought to, as this will be where Buck is supposed to come back to after his tests and examinations are finally over.

Christopher could provide at least some context to how they ended up like this. The kid is too smart for his own good at times, it turns out. He caught sight of Buck when he took on the bomber and saw that he got hurt. And since hurt people go to ambulances where people like his dad save them and make them better, this is to where he went. And he would threaten Deborah with his crutches, which Eddie will have to lecture about later. Once he found Buck, he just crawled up the gurney and didn’t take no for an answer.

Another fifteen minutes later, Buck is wheeled into the room, looking tired and pissed and just a bit more like the guy he remembers, the man who hates being in hospitals with every fiber of his being.

For a time, they just sit in silence. It is Buck who can’t take it anymore in the end, and snaps, “You can stop staring. I already have a puncture wound, don’t need to get stabbed by the evil eye now, too.”

Eddie shakes his head. “How are you still joking about this?”

“Because I still find myself utterly hilarious.”

“We didn’t know where you were for over a year. No message. No nothing,” Eddie accuses.

You disappeared. You left. You left the 118 behind. You left your family behind. Maddie. Christopher… me…

“And that you know I’m in LA right now was not part of the plan, I told you.”

“Why wasn’t it?” Eddie wants to know.

Buck shrugs, his voice non-committal. “I made the cut. I’m the bad guy. I know. Rules of the game.”

“I’m just trying to understand, Buck.”

“There’s nothing to understand,” Buck argues. “I had no intention to run into you guys. I went away. I didn’t want to cause further upset by coming back. I didn’t choose to be here. It was because of the job.”

Speaking of…

“What job is that anyway?”

“Water slide tester,” Buck replies, his face perfectly blank.

Eddie snorts, shaking his head. “Piss off.”

“I slide around the world.”

“Would you take this seriously for one second?” Eddie demands. He can’t believe this guy sometimes, many times. Can’t he see the damage done? Can’t he see how out of line it is to joke about it?

“I think I’ll pass,” is all Buck delivers. And it pisses Eddie off to no end.

“So that’s all I get? After all that’s been?”

Buck licks his lips, folds his arms over his chest, winces at the strain against his aching stomach. “Yup.”

Eddie can’t even say he is angry. Okay, he is angry, but one good look at Buck’s face and he can see how the mask is slipping. He sees pain there, thinly veiled by his quipping. He notices the longing in Buck’s eyes whenever he allows himself to look at Christopher dozing peacefully, only to pull away as though he got electrocuted for letting that emotion happen.

Just what is it with the man he used to know so well? How could they become strangers in the course of a year?

Eddie doesn't get to finish the thought as a doctor motions inside. Buck’s attention instantly bounces over to the dark-haired man.

“Hello Mr. Buckley.”

“What’s the news, Doc?” he asks.

“Good news for you, actually,” the doctor says. “You are free to go.”

Eddie shakes his head, as though he was trying to get water out of his ears. “Wait, what? What of the test results? Is there tissue damage? Is it ruled out that there is no internal bleeding? Won’t you keep him overnight? Did you even look at his medical history? He’s on blood thinners…”

“Haven’t been for almost half a year,” Buck argues.

Eddie blinks at him. “What?”

“… Surprise?” Buck holds up his hands, pulling a face.

“Still!” Eddie shouts, turning back to the man in scrubs.

“It’s really more of a nick,” the doctor tries to assure him.

Eddie has seen the bloody bandages. He knows that this is bullshit. Just what is this doctor doing?

“Told you. AndJack,” Buck chimes. “Joke’s on both of you.”

“He got stabbed. With a knife,” Eddie argues, still not quite believing it that he has to point that out to a medical professional.

“I saw. And we treated it. Just needed stitches and a shit ton of antibiotics.” He hands Buck a clipboard to sign some things.

“A shit ton. Could you be any more precise?” Eddie asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Chill. Doc will know what he’s doing,” Buck argues, though Eddie pays him no mind. His eyes are now set on that pathetic excuse of a medical professional and Eddie is ready to throw a fit, if he has to.

“We need to keep the beds clear for emergencies,” the doctor adds, as though that was in any shape or form reason to release a man who just got stabbed. With a knife. After he was on blood-thinners – apparently – half a year ago.

“It’s workday, I know you aren’t…,” Eddie tries, but Buck interjects, “Doctor’s orders. Gotta listen to the experts, c’mon.”

He looks back at the doctor standing beside the bed, handing the clipboard back. “Okay, all signed. Thanks, Doc.”

The doctor studies it for a long moment, then nods his head.

“You are seriously just going to go?” Eddie asks, not quite believing what’s happening.

“The doctor said I could.”

“Look, if it puts you at ease, I will get my colleague in here to speak to you to get a second opinion while I take Mr. Buckley here to get his medication. Then you can rest assured that all is as it should be,” the doctor tries, his tone now mild.

Nothing is as it should be. Absolutely nothing.

This whole situation is abnormal. Buck shouldn’t be in hospital. He shouldn’t act like this. He should be spooning Christopher on the bed, cuddle him and kiss his head. He should have asked for Maddie by now. The 118 should be on the way here. Buck should still be working with them, with him. They should have movie nights on Fridays and Buck should babysit Christopher at least once a week. They should watch games together and doze off on the couch. Buck should ask for juice and burritos. Eddie should be making arrangements so that Buck can spend the night over at their place, so that he isn’t alone after such an event. There should be a spark in Buck’s eyes. He shouldn’t feel like a ghost. None of this should be. And yet, it is.

“Show the way, Doc,” Buck says, cutting through the silence. Eddie looks up.

“I’ll just get you a wheelchair, hold on.”

Buck sits up. Eddie doesn’t miss how the air leaves him for a moment, but he still pushes on. Eddie rounds the bed, extending his arms to steady Buck, but the younger man just holds up his hands, gritting his teeth.

“Don’t.”

It’s no demand. It’s not aggressive. It’s a plea. And a desperate one.

Eddie holds up his hands to give Buck space as he folds his legs out of bed, ignoring every instinct inside himself to hold on anyway, if only to calm the tremor in Buck’s body the way he used to do it when he saw him this upset.

“I’m sorry for all this,” Buck mutters, not looking at him. “I’m glad Christopher is safe.”

“You know, just because you didn’t plan on seeing us, you still can.”

“No, I really can’t. Thanks, though.”

“Ah, you’re already up, Mr. Buckley. See? He’s doing great. Will be as good as new in a matter of days,” the doctor chimes as he comes back inside with the wheelchair. He helps Buck settle in, though Buck is basically doing it entirely on his own.

“We’ll be right back.”

Eddie watches as the doctor wheels Buck out of the room, out into the busy hallway. He tries his phone again, still no luck. Though he could really use some support here. Because none of it makes sense to Eddie anymore.

------------------------

“Coast’s clear,” Neil says, peering around the corner.

Buck hits the other man in the arm, hard.

“Hey! What’s that for?” the other man whines, pulling back into the storage room he maneuvered him into at Buck’s behest written on the clipboard.

“You didn’t have to put on an act as a doctor, you jackass,” Buck grumbles as he pulls the hoodie over his head, ignoring the pain flaring up in his side.

Just a nick my ass.

“I watched enough Grey’s Anatomy to know my way around,” Neil snorts. “I totally pass as a McSexy.”

“He’s an ex-Army medic and first responder, dude,” Buck argues. “Also, you are not McSexy, you’re McSaggy.”

“Ah, so it’s the ex-ex!”

Buck hits him again.

“You slut!” Neil laughs. “I guessed you had a thing for Latinas.”

Buck hits him again for emphasis, though he knows it’s all lost on a guy like Neil. He also knows he shouldn’t be surprised by the guy anymore. But the moment he rolled in with the white coat and the toothpaste smile, Buck will have to admit he was shocked. Though that was basically his modus operandi throughout the day. First the bomber, then Christopher, God, Christopher, and then Eddie.

“Okay. I checked, you can use the stairway…,” Neil tries to say, but Buck cuts him off. He’s tired and not up for faux tactic talk. “Dude, I know that hospital better than I’d like to. Just tell me where to in the parking lot.”

“Towards the back. Black sedan.” He tosses him the keys. “And you won’t be driving.”

Buck rolls his eyes as he stuffs the keys into the pocket of the hoodie. “No shit.”

“Wanna bid adieu to lover boy?” Neil asks, though not really.

Neil always says one thing, means the other, then says what he means, then he doesn’t. On most days, Buck enjoys Neil’s company. He’s at least fun to talk to, when he isn’t being a little bitch about it. The guy keeps a calm head in any situation without a stick up his ass. But right now, everything in Buck hates him. Though even that, Buck knows, is just projection.

It’s myself I hate.

“I did over a year ago,” Buck answers, whether to assure Neil or to remind himself, he isn’t quite sure. “Let’s just get moving.”

“Hoo-yah.”

Buck looks back out the hallway to see Eddie still standing in the doorway, fuming. He hates to see him like this, to leave him like this, but it’s just another thing to add, in the end. To all the hatred Eddie and the others are entitled to feel. Because yes, Buck is the bad guy in this. He knows it’s true.

It’s what he left behind, 413 days ago.

It’s what he won’t ever go back to, no matter the amount of days passed.

“Coast still clear?” Buck asks.

Neil checks, nods. Buck takes his cue and ducks out of the storage room, swiftly making his way to the staircase.

He leaves the comforting thought behind that maybe, someday, Eddie will forgive him this, all of this, and remember only the times Buck wasn’t there to wreak havoc in his life.

Buck finds the car with ease and he climbs in with not as much ease. Because his side is burning and he needs to sleep. He rather sleeps through nightmares than live through them.

Neil emerges a few minutes later, laughing to himself as he gets into the driver’s seat.

“Nice of you to make me call him a taxi,” Neil points out. “The lines are still dead, as could be expected, but I could get through with the super fancy, not at all fancy-looking phone we got.”

Buck noted that down on the clipboard as well, of course. It’s the damn well least.

“He left his car at the plaza,” Buck almost whispers.

Neil starts the engine and pulls out of the parking lot, eyes fixed on the road. “You okay?”

“I was stabbed, so I’m bloody terrific.”

“Good, then you’ll be delighted that we’ll be staying a while longer,” Neil informs him.

Buck leans his head back. “You’re fucking me, right?”

They had a plan. Just two weeks. Just this case. They had the network down. They should have been done with this guy thanks to whom he took a knife to the stomach today. That should have been it. He should have a flight booked out of here, away from the eyes haunting him in his dreams, the questions that burned on Eddie’s lips, though he wouldn’t say them. Because he never does.

“For as long as you don’t turn out to be a hot redhead with no appendages between the legs, no, I’m not fucking you.”

“How long?” Buck sighs. It’s not like he has any illusions about it: He will have to tay for as long as it’s demanded of him.

Rules of the game.

“At least another two weeks,” Neil lets him know. “The big boss man agreed with your assessment about how the network operates. And apparently, there’s been additional intel that just came our way. Get this: The pack leader is supposedly in town right now.”

“Fuck,” Buck curses. He hoped that that person’s appearance would be as far away from L.A. as is humanly possible. His prediction was that with the evidence gathered here, they could narrow down the pack leader and then move before the network spread any further. But the pack leader is here for a show, and it will blow.

“Big boss man also said you get the rest of the week off to heal up, coz you actually belonged in hospital”

“No shit,” Buck snorts, trying to find a comfortable position he knows he isn’t going to get.

“But so long you take it easy, you should be fine.”

“I appreciate the care,” Buck snorts.

“Oh please, I don’t care a rat’s ass about you. You’re just damn good at the job, is all…,” Neil says jovially, but then adds in a smaller voice, “Couldn’t help but notice, though.”

“Notice what?”

“You didn’t kill the guy.”

“Damn, you’re observant,” Buck scoffs.

“We are trained to shoot first, ask questions later.”

“I thought I could talk him out of it. And I did, after he stabbed me, fine. But no one turned to human confetti.”

“Precisely. You had a gun on you, of course you did,” Neil argues. “You could’ve just taken the shot.”

“Risk would’ve been higher for him to release the trigger, had I taken the shot. I had to get close anyway. Like that, I had a chance to wrestle the switch from him,” Buck replies. “Also, that means we have two witnesses now we can squeeze out for information regarding the pack leader. Normally, we only get to pick up their pieces.”

Neil shrugs. “Just saying, don’t slip into old habits. You’re no longer a firefighter. You see a bad guy? You kill a bad guy.”

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t hear you,” Neil huffs.

“Don’t be a bitch and drive, damn it.”

“I mean it, Buckley,” Neil adds, grinding his teeth. “I have no intention to get dragged into your problems. You can’t turn the switch? You gotta go.”

Oh, and how much Buck would love to. But even if Neil may hate his guts, Buck is where he belongs, where he belonged long before he could fool himself into believing that his place was in a firehouse with red furniture and a house wherein the most adorable kid lives and plays video games.

Even if I wanted to, if you wanted me to, there’s someone who wants me to say. And he calls the shots. Rules of the game.

“I made a call based on the evidence and my experience,” Buck reasons, because it’s still true. He took a risk based on what he knows himself capable of.

“Good, just checking.”

“There’s no need.”

“There better not be. We have a mission to fulfill.”

“Hoo-yah.”

[bigskydreaming]

Okay haha I lied, whoops I do that. THIS is the last one. Again from various parts of ‘Kings of the Sky’ but since I was talking so much about Dick’s grandfather, why not some snippets of him from this series too. (For this AU I imagined what if Dick’s paternal grandparents lived into their eighties, like do we KNOW they couldn’t have? Hmm? Don’t answer that if we do, shh, let me have this. Anyway, so here Dick’s grandmother died when he was two and his grandfather when he was five.)

Dick is retelling this story about him and his grandfather to Jason and Cass.

************

“But there is no King of the Sky, Dickie,” he’d said to me then with a wink. “That’s the joke, you see? No one can claim the sky as theirs, no one can own it. Send your armies to seize it in your name and all you’d see is legions of empty-handed fools all grasping at air! There’s no way to draw your borders, no foundation on which you could build any walls. And where would you even put your throne?”

“He’d laughed then, mischievous and wheezing, as he recalled all the courts the circus had entertained back in its glory days, when Europe’s nobility would always each host some circus or troupe or performers at various festivals. All the kings and queens for whom he’d performed his signature feats, who’d show him off to their most important guests afterwards. The ones who had been invited specifically so they’d see that this court held only the grandest of celebrations, that they and their guests were entertained by only the very best of the best.”

“Oh, but they were always so eager to introduce me by title,” he’d said, rheumy eyes still somehow keeping their sparkle. “There they were, kings and crown princes, pushing me forward and telling their guests to come greet me, this commoner they were all too glad to proclaim royalty no different to them. After all, any king can present his guests with an entertaining spectacle, but how much grander is the king who hosts the spectacle of being entertained by another king? Ah, but they were always more than happy to elevate me if but for the night…in doing so, they elevated themselves as well. Up we all went, all without feet ever leaving the floor!”

“Names can be such a funny thing, don’t you think?” He’d sighed and sort of mused then, stroking his chin like he was pondering some great mystery. “Meaning nothing and everything all at the same time. That’s a powerful trick. Useful too, if you can master it.”

I know I started giggling then, just because as far back as I can remember, names were always kind of a…almost a passion of his, I guess you could say. It was just this thing he did, it was like he could never just let a name be. There was always some trick to a name, he’d insist. You just had to find it. Its why our family colors were red, yellow and green, as a matter of fact. All in only the brightest hues of each, combining to make us the complete opposite of the Gray in our name.

"The crowd comes in to see the acrobat named Grayson,” my grandfather would say, “and what do they expect from just the name? Drab, unremarkable, likely to be lost in the shadows, from just the sound of him. But then he dives off the platform in a burst of colors impossible to miss and the crowd gasps, expectations shattered in an instant….and from there, they think, what more surprises might possibly await? And already you have them at the edge of their seat, eyes caught by the colors of a costume its impossible to lose sight of. You command their attention, you’re unencumbered by their assumptions, and they’re yours from that moment on. And all of that from just a pop of color, a warning that you are not what they thought….and a name. A Flying Grayson, up above as expected, yet unexpectedly the brightest thing in the sky. An inherent contradiction. An impossible sight you can’t help but to see.”

“Anyway, so there I was,” Dick said, straightening up and shaking his head with a slightly rueful smile, as if to physically pull himself out of the undertow of memories tugging him further away from where he’d begun. “Already giggling just from his little chin-stroking act as he started talking about names, because I knew he was bound to say something silly next, just from that. And he’d jumped a little, and turned in his chair to face me directly and with his full focus, because Grandpa thrived off of an engaged audience like nothing else.”

“Yes, a powerful thing, a name,” he’d continued after a moment that was either a dramatic pause or me thinking anything longer than ten seconds might as well be the same as an hour, at that age. “But a tricky business, naming things, as you first have to know what a thing is, before you attempt to claim it by naming it what it is not. Because being named can just as easily be a powerful trap, of course. If a man doesn’t know himself well enough to know he is not what a name claims, he can wind up stuck in a cage that’s not sized to fit him. Simply because he doesn’t know he has more than enough room to slip free of it if he tried.”

“Then he leaned down close enough to me to whisper, and looked around as if checking we were alone before dropping into a raspy whisper like we were conspiring. “But a man who knows what he wants and knows what he’s capable of, and can put the right name to both….that’s where the real magic is. Do you know what kind of power your name has?”

“Richard means lion-hearted,” I remember reporting after some thought. And that he blew a raspberry right after that like he was the five year old of the two of us, but then, Grandpa was just like that sometimes. “Yes, yes, true enough,” he said, making a face like he’d tasted something sour, “But I don’t mean the one your father picked probably to spite me for naming him John in the first place. No matter how many times I tell him I had nothing to do with that, I lost the right to name him in a card game with your Grandmother. Although for the record, I still maintain I didn’t lose, she just cheated. But I still have no idea how she did it so I have to respect that, I suppose. But no. Not that name. The one your mother gave you.”

“And of course then I knew he meant Robin, and said so, and he asked what that meant to me. And I remember thinking long and hard about that one, because as I said, I knew even by that age what Grandpa was like on the subject of names, and so I was sure there was some kind of riddle or game in what he was asking, I just wasn’t sure where. So finally I just referred back to what my Mom always used to say, about me being born on the first day of spring, and being her little Robin. And he just nodded, and then he asked: And do you remember the first time you called yourself Robin to someone else, and why? What you said then?”

*******************

And then from the very last (intended) installment, ‘Its a Long, Long Way To Tipperary,’ again with Dick telling this to Jason and Cass and finishing a conversation started earlier in the series:

“Names have power,” Grandpa said to me, on one of the last days I remember with him before he passed away. We were sitting outside in folding chairs and watching the stars, until he got too cold and we had to go in. But while we were out there, so much of what he said…I didn’t really understand most of it at the time. Honestly, even what I thought I understood, I realized years later wasn’t really right. I could follow the words but so much of what he meant, I didn’t even begin to understand until I happened to look back to that night years later.

But for months I’d heard my parents talking when they thought I couldn’t hear. I’d seen him doubled over and coughing more and more frequently, how tightly he clutched a blanket around him when it wasn’t really all that cold. I may not have fully known what was coming but I think I knew on some level that something was coming to an end.

And I remember him talking so fast that night, words spilling out so quickly in a confusing mess like he couldn’t take the time to shape them properly and just had to get them out….I remember soaking it all in, as much as I could, knowing that it was important even if I didn’t know what it even was, or why. Like I was trying to just….absorb it, make it a part of me the way it almost felt like it was bleeding out of him. I don’t know that the thought, the image of him dying that summer, of soon being without him, I can’t say whether that actually ever occurred to me. I just know that I knew urgency, and I knew Grandpa was only urgent when it mattered, so I listened without understanding and somehow managed to store most of it away. And honestly, I don’t know that he was even trying to make sure he was understood, or even caring….so much as just trying to get it out of him, like what was most important was just that he said it and it was heard. Maybe just so he knew it wouldn’t die with him.

“But however it got there, however it was I managed to remember clearly enough, there it all was, and right when I most needed to hear what he’d said to me that night. The things nobody else could have told me because nobody else knew the secret language of names that he seemed to speak, that he’d spent his whole life learning all so that maybe he could somehow in that find his own name. Not the label he’d been left with, a description or title.....but a name, the one each child is supposed to get, something to say who they are, not merely what.”

“Names have power,” he said to me that night. “They can be magic in the right hands. A man who knows who he is knows his own name. And the things you can do with that, the doors that can be unlocked…oh, Dickie, my boy. There’s a door to anywhere if you can speak the right name when asked for a key. But its not enough to just say them and throw them around, its not the sounds, the words, its what they are. You can’t pretend to know a thing, to know yourself. You have to really, truly know. But once you know….for a boy as bright as you, there’s no end to the possibilities.”

“So here’s what you must always remember, the real trick of it all…..names have power. But the power isn’t in the name. The power is in what you put in that name. You can’t claim a name and therein take its power, you see….because you have to know first what you’re trying to take from it, what you see when you look at it. What you want it to be, want it to give to you, what you want it to make you when you say this is me and I am this. Your father named you Richard, though he calls you Dickie. You were born a Flying Grayson and thus you always will be. Your mother named you her little Robin, born on the first day of spring. And all of these can be you, because no one is just one thing. And yet none of them are you unless you claim them to be.

So if you are to be Robin, as your mother named you but is only you if you choose to say yes that is me…..before you claim it fully, before you truly make it yours, you have to look at Robin and what you want the mirror to show when you look in it and say I am Robin and this is me. You have to see Robin not as even your mother sees her Robin, but as you see your Robin.

That’s the danger and that’s the trick.

You can’t claim Robin while seeing only what someone else sees, and think that by claiming it you’ve claimed its power….instead you’ve just claimed a trap, donned a self that doesn’t suit you because it is not you, only something someone else thought could be you.

Because in claiming that, you claim everything that comes with it….and then you will never be free to be more than whatever they thought you could be. There is no power in that, no potential, no freedom…..just the limitations you’ve accepted as your own, because someone thought you limited by such things, and yet you agreed that they were right when you claimed the name….but only the name as they shaped and imagined it to be.

So who is Robin? What power do you see in that name? Don’t reach out and seize it the moment someone sets it forth in front of you, assuming that is all it can be, the highest it can ever take you. Never claim a name if you haven’t first looked at it as you first see it...and then imagined it bigger, and then imagined it deeper, and then imagined it greater...and then kept going until you can’t imagine any more. And only then will you know what that name is…..when you say this name is who I truly want to be.

Robin is a bird, yes, Robin Red-Breast, a creature of spring, of the air, of new life. You can claim that and make it yours but first…..what else could Robin be?

Can not Robin just as easily be Robin Hood or Robin Goodfellow? Couldn’t you be? And why even be just one, when you can be all three?

No man is ever just one thing, and any man who thinks that he is has more dreaming to do. 

So be Robin, in as much as you imagine Robin to be. Be the bird that flies, or the champion of the poor, or the merry trickster whom even kings fear. Or be all of them in one….there’s power enough for all of that in just that one little name….so long as you put it there first.

Its that simple, and its that tricky. There is no in between. You are whatever you claim as you - but the good and the bad, for better and for worse. The space that name holds and the walls that hold it in.

So if you remember nothing more, Dickie, Richard, Robin times three or however many more Robins you might be…..if someday you say I taught you nothing else, there’s nothing else I gave you or left for you to take with you wherever you go, hear me now, and remember this:

No matter how well you might think it suits you at first, the name you claim because it fits you as you are....will never be more than a trap.

The power in names, the true power…..only comes from claiming the name that fits the you, that you would dream yourself to be.

You can always be more than you are. And any name that tells you otherwise is not truly anything but a lie.

Many kings of the earth have laughed as they introduced your family as Kings of the Sky throughout the years. But the jest they don’t get is for all their riches, they were the ones content to claim titles and deeds that leave them trapped on the ground, confined within borders of their own makings, sealed behind walls they chose to erect between them and everything that was not theirs and thus would never be. But a King of the Sky soars above all of that, needing none of that…..because the sky has no end, and is so much vaster than any of that could ever be.

So if you would someday choose a crown, my little Prince of the Sky, never seek yours on the ground. Reach for one bigger than the ground could ever hold….only that could ever fit all that you might someday be.”